#high school sucked man my friends moved away and i legit only lasted one year after that

[clits-and-clips]

Genuinely believe that if I had just been diagnosed as a teenager or in my early twenties I wouldn't have lost all my friends or my ex but hey what are ya gonna do

[akaashioppa]

Forever Will Never Be The Same

pairings: oikawa x reader

summary: The reader finally confronts her husband Oikawa after cheating allegations in the male locker room. angst!!!

warnings: curse words, mentions of the reader having a son with Oikawa, confronting of cheating. 

w/c: 1736

A/N: first time writing for Oikawa :)

Haikyuu Masterlist  Masterlist

“Everyone get out now!”

Your voice echoed off the metal lockers of the locker room. Eyes widened as you made your way into the changing room, not because of the fact that a girl was entering the male’s locker room. It was the fact that Oikawa (Y/N) was coming to kick her husband’s ass. Just as every man passed you to flee, their musky scent filled your nose making you cringe.

After the final whistle of the game, people were scavenging to take pictures with Oikawa Toru except you. Each morning that you woke your husband up he would give you one of those cheeky grins that he was giving the fans right now, the stupid grin was fake. Laughter, jokes, and cries filled your ears, for what reason? The Great King made his grand entrance back to the court, winning both sets with the help of Iwaizumi. The Great King himself showered his fans with love and pictures while you stood from afar, anger flowing through your veins. Knowing the Poker Face King for ten years and having been married to him for two, it was easy to mimic the grin. As girls would pass by screaming about the pictures they took with him you would shoot them that famous grin. 

You timed each moment perfectly, celebrating the win, pictures with fans, interviews with the sports commentators, more fan interaction and now he hits the locker room for a shower. Luckily for you, he was beginning to take his sweaty jersey off, beads of sweat from the previous game were still prominent.

“What are you doing here?” The look on his face was one of a kind, it was a mixture of panic and anger. Nothing to be afraid of, it’s not like he didn’t give you the same look when you caught him at the bar with another woman. Or the time you were driving down the road with his phone constantly going off, every other minute he’d get notifications, this would go on for hours.

The yelling of the men from the locker room made you come back to reality. Have they not seen a woman before or was it because you were standing there looking at their dick prints? A white tint cast over their knuckles from how hard they were holding their towels around their waist. ‘What a sight to see

“You can either tell me the truth or you can tell me the truth there’s no in-between.” You barked at Oikawa, men were still scattering out of the locker room. You barely gave them time to leave before you bombarded your husband with your question. 

The  panic on his face was quite entertaining, he moved in front of you so you couldn’t see his half-naked teammates running out of the locker room.“What are you talking about!?”

“When were you going to tell me that you went to a nightclub with Iwaizumi!? He told me everything so I’m giving you the chance to come clean about it!”

“I didn’t tell you because I knew you were going to be mad.”

“Did you sleep with her?” You got straight to the point, there was no need for you to sit here and procrastinate any longer. This has been on your mind ever since you got those three attachments from Iwaizumi.

“No” He scoffed, “Why would I sleep with her? I have too much respect for you to sleep with her.”

“Oh really, the way you were holding her waist makes me think differently. The way you kissed her neck makes me want to snap yours!” You held up a photo on your phone with him and another girl at the nightclub. His head was in her neck, you could see that he was kissing on it, his arms were wrapped around her waist but his hands were dangerously low.“Respect? Do you even know the definition of respect because if you did you wouldn’t have me out here looking stupid!”

He sat down on the bench of the locker room, his arms were tightly around his chest. Oikawa was already over this conversation, this wasn’t the first time you blew up in the face about this. Nor the second, he respected you in a weird way. He never laid hands on you, or even yelled at you but he couldn’t keep his hands off other women. 

“How do I make you look stupid!? I give you everything you want!”

“Everything but love.” You yelled desperately, the thing about arguing with him about these situations was that he’d always claim that he knew what you wanted. He’d always try to bring light on the situation when he clearly fucked up. He was a great husband, you guys had been dating since high school. Since he got the fame and money things turned upside down, he became a legit monster. 

“I show love to you every day, I make love to you every week!” His voice rose an octave, his hand was flying all over the place when he spoke. 

You were appalled, sickened, offended, that he could say something like that. It hurts to know that he thinks this way, it almost makes you feel worthless. Does he really consider having sex as love? “That’s not loving Toru, that's lust.”

He sighed, his hands were on his knees, he got up to finish packing up his things. “Well, I’m over it. I don’t want you here anymore. Leave”

“How can you give up so easily on us.” You forced his hands away from his bag, he looked at you with a confused face. You poked him hard in his chest slowly provoking him, “I forgave you so many times after you treated me like trash. All the times you cheated and came home with women’s numbers falling out of your pockets. Many sleepless nights just to make sure that your knee would stop bothering you. I wake up every morning to make you your special breakfast so you can be game ready and yet I haven’t given up on you.”

“I’m just tired of arguing with you. All you do is complain about my lifestyle. If you can’t keep up then we shouldn’t be together. How can I keep consoling you after you get all jealous about me hanging out with fans or me taking pictures with my fans? It’s just toxic (Y/N).” He spat back, he didn’t seem angered. It was more of an annoyed look. 

“Because you only hang out with female fans, it’s fine and all but when they’re posting sexual pictures with you, it’s a different story. I scroll down my feed to see you with more women than see pictures of us together. It’s like I don’t exist”

“Whatever (Y/N) I need to get ready for the after-party.”

“What about us? How are we going to fix this?”

“There is no us!” He screamed, his voice echoed off the lockers. He placed his hands on his hips trying to compose himself. “It’s only you and Torio. And me, Torio and volleyball! There is no us, not anymore and that’s it!”

You took a step back, each word was like a dagger in your heart. He would often bring your son into the matter. Ever since your son was born you’ve always felt like you and Oikawa had grown apart. It was like you were forcing yourself to stay for Torio’s sake. There would be days where things were good, on those days you and Oikawa wouldn’t argue. However, when days like this occur he’d make you hurt, you’d always end up questioning your ability of loving. Deep down you felt like you guys were drifting apart but you didn’t want to admit it. It was too painful, Oikawa would have been left if it weren’t for Torio. He wanted his fans and the sports media to look at him as a family man.

“Why is it so hard to ask someone to love me!?” Your breaking point had finally come, you held your hands over your mouth to stop the loud sobs. It was hard to know that your husband and high school sweetheart didn’t want you. You gave up everything to support him with his dreams, family, friends, work, school, and even your fucking sanity and yet she still treats you this way. 

He stood there watching you beat yourself down, he didn’t do anything but place a hand on your shoulder. You shrugged it off, the last thing you wanted was for him to touch you. “Listen I loved you back in high school but now high school is over. You’re still basing this love off of that and I’m not here for it. All these insecurities you have are a bit annoying in my defense. Maybe this relationship would work if you grew the fuck up.”

“You can’t give up on us now. We need each other. Torio needs his dad. ” Lie, you needed him. Yes, Torio needed his dad but you needed your husband. It was crazy to think that you would go back to him but it was just your toxic ways. You never loved anyone but him, he was all that you had. Your life that you lived was based upon him. 

“Look, we can talk about this later if you want, but right now I have thousands of fans waiting for me to show my face. You can either suck it up and go out there with me or you can hit the back doors and go home.”

“Toru…”

“What do you want?” He groaned, he turned back around with an annoyed face. He was fed up with you and even the situation. You knew he wanted you gone, he was waiting for the minute you’d leave so he could go and party. 

Obviously an answer, he was too consumed with himself to even realize that. It was the reason why you came in here yelling at his teammates to leave, you wanted to ask him a question in private. The thought of getting your feelings hurt in front of everyone was not ideal.

“I just asked a simple question. Did you sleep with her?”

You looked up at him for the first him, your vision was blurry but you could see him well enough to see that stupid smirk.“What do you think?”

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s stepkid

Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader

warnings: alcohol mention

a/n: i rushed these so bad i just wanted to post dhhshsnsna

prompt: y/n is pepper’s kiddo!

it was just you and your mom for a long time

pepper and y/n potts

she couldn’t keep up with you sometimes, too busy dealing with the manchild that was mister anthony edward stark

speaking of—

“uh, who’s this?” -tony, pointing at you

“mr. stark, i am so sorry, the school closed because some kid set fire to the science lab and i didn’t have time to find a sitter—”

“no, it’s fine, no need to apologize. hey, kid, you wanna sit in the boss’s chair? i’ll let you run the company for the day!” *cue you nodding* “sweet, would you mind that, ms. potts?”

“oh? no, not at all” *mouthing* “thank you”

“so, uh, what’s your name? no, don’t tell me: ketchup.”

*giggling* “y/n”

“no way! that was my second guess!”

tony wasn’t used to being around kids

he had no idea that he was actually kind of good around them

despite a few minor hiccups

“you sit in my chair and im gonna spin you around, sound like fun?”

he spun you around WAY too fast and you were diiiiizzy, also you fell off the chair

“don’t tell your mom that we did that. she may be my assistant, but she scares the shit out of me. also, don’t say ‘shit’”

dude he just thought you were a cool kid!!!

“hey, you know, ms. potts, you dont really need to hire a babysitter anymore. y/n’s doing just fine hanging out here”

“how am i not surprised you befriended an actual child?”

she still took him up on his offer, you seemed pretty happy

when your mom worked late, you passed out in tonys office

tony and you had your own little secrets (like falling off the spinning chair), tony showed you around stark tower, and you practically lived there

“i got you a happy meal from mcdonalds!” -tony every day after your school

in all honesty, you weren’t the “popular” kid at school...not even close

but tony made up for it

“y/n! i found this old racecar toy in a box of old stuff, you wanna hold onto it for me?”

you kind of grew up in stark tower tbh? it was pretty cool

and as you grew up, you started to notice more

“mr. tony, do you have a crush on my mom?”

“do i what? no, no, i do—who the hell am i kidding? you caught me”

“called it!”

after that you did everything to try and get them together

when your mom was talking to tony, you would stand behind her and wiggle your eyebrows and just taunt tony endlessly

no! tony cannot remember your mom’s birthday for the life of him! you are his calendar now

“dude, why dont you just ask JARVIS to remind you?”

“i may be a genius, but that doesn’t mean i have common sense”

“wise words, sir” -JARVIS

when tony disappeared for 3 months you were so sad???? like you were not okay at all

no

and when he came back, he literally exited the plane saying “WHERE’S ‘T-POTT??’”

(your wonderful nickname. ‘t’ for ‘tony jr.’ and ‘pott’ for ‘potts’)

“my mom missed you”

“oh, i bet she did”

“you turned my child into you, tony. i will never forgive you for this”

“well, at least y/n was here to fill in for me, huh?”

tony wanted to show you the arc reactor but he was actually afraid of scarring you lmfaoooo

but he did let you in on the iron man secret (he knew you wouldn’t snitch)

and just to make sure:

“if you dont tell anyone, i’ll buy you a car when you turn 16”

“man, that’s like, forever away”

“good, maybe you’ll forget by then”

ur mom kinda maybe sorta found out abt iron man :/ she told you that tony was a bad influence

“mom! no, tony’s cool! he’s like a superhero”

“no, sweetie, he’s a rich guy with issues. we’re leaving”

that didn’t last long

not long at all

and soon they FINALLY got together

“jeez, i thought you two would never stop pining after each other”

“couldnt have done it without my wingman” -tony *fistbump*

“as thanks can i have my own iron man suit?”

“yes.” *pepper glaring at him* “no.”

sooner or later your mom and you moved into tony’s house and you got a really big room!!!!

it was completely decked out

king sized bed, flatscreen tv, mini-fridge, microwave, computer, your own bathroom with a smaller tv, a poster of tony??? (you vandalized it and put it in his workshop), and more!!!

okay you were spoiled

“do you like it here? are you sure i made the right choice?” -pepper

“are you kidding, mom? this is awesome! plus, you’re happy, i’m happy, tony’s happy, i think JARVIS is even happy!”

“i am, mx. potts. simply ecstatic” -JARVIS

pepper was really happy!! it was a pretty cool family

you started giving your school tony’s number if you ever got in trouble, you knew he’d cover for you

“mr. potts, is it?”

“sure”

“your child, y/n, punched another student in the face today. we’re very disappointed in their behavior”

“why’d they punch the kid?”

“well, the other student punched y/n first”

“HAH! thank you for wasting my time. send y/n back to class and call me back if something important comes up”

he literally gave you a high five when you got home

“i gave him a black eye!”

“i couldn’t be more proud. i mean, i dont condone violence, but self defense is a whole other story”

a little help in the workshop, tony asks you to hold the flashlight

“why don’t you get one of your robots to hold this for you?”

“are you kidding me, you’re complaining? we’re having stepdad/stepkid bonding time! and dum-e can’t do anything right, i dont trust him”

youve had a few theme park trips as a family ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

also tony has 100% told you to wait in the car and then left you alone for 2+ hours

“i’m not like a regular dad, im a step-dad. want some beer? you can have a little sip. i’d rather you do it in the house”

your mother actually does love how he actually cares about you!

“y/n is 12% my responsibility” -tony

“tony, you are impossible” -pepper

no avengering for you! pepper said no!!!!!!

disappointed but not surprised

iron man 3: y/n potts is put through the wringer

Text Message to Mr. Tony: bro you better come get your girl, me and happy are watching this other guy flirting with her. he’s showing her pics of his ‘big brain’

Mr. Tony: HE WHAT

Text Message to Mr. Tony: Tony he looks creepy i don’t want him to be my new stepdad do something!!!

anyways ur house kinda blew up and ur mom and you kinda got kidnapped and u were right abt that guy being creepy and thankfully no experiments were done on you but like your mom kinda almost died and her and tony were fine!!! all good in the end

you met mr. col. james rhodes that day

“aw, you’re the kid ive heard so much about” -rhodey

“you mean the coolest kid in the world?check.”

“you cant tell me you aren’t tony’s biological child, good god”

you got to meet the avengers later on too! (you’d already met natasha tho, only briefly)

“i know it can be a little overwhelming, right? meeting all these heros, legends even—” -rhodey

“oh, my god, is that thor? thor!!” -you, leaving rhodey in the dust

literally why does pepper trust you around tony something always goes wrong there were literally robots attacking, you were only at avengers tower bc your mom was busy with the company and she thought you’d be safe with the avengers. the AVENGERS.

“please dont tell your mom that i created a bad robot that tried to kill us. the robot will be the least of our problems” -tony

he made happy pick you up and you had to miss out on FUN and it sucked a lot

“it’s okay, y/n! i’m fun, too!” -happy

then your mom and tony took a break and your life got mega-boring for a while, but they weren’t separated for that long. you try not to think about it. it was brutal

Mr. Tony: Does she miss me?

New Message to Mr. Tony: I think so. Either that or she’s crying and drinking wine in the dark for no reason.

Mr. Tony: Damn it, now I feel bad. I miss her a lot. Oh, also, the Avengers say ‘hi,’ I’m in Germany with some bad news, I’ll explain later if you don’t see it on TV first, and I found you the perfect friend! His name is Peter and I think you’d like the school he goes to, it’s in Midtown. Smart kid school.

New Message to Mr. Tony: I’ll look into it, thanks. Also, I don’t like how those all connect. Please update me asap

watching the news to see several avengers arrested, cap on the run, and more!

“maybe it was good i didn’t fall in with the avengers”

tony and pepper finally got back together and you actually transferred to midtown high! peter and his friend group accepted you quickly, it was great. you and flash unfortunately had the most in common

you’d literally text happy right next to peter and he’d immediately reply to you. it hurt peter’s feelings

Momma: Sweetie! I’m working in the office late, leftovers are in the fridge, hope you have a wonderful day at school! 💕

👉👈the vulture tried to kill you for being tony’s stepkid, tony made peter promise to protect you

“y/n, you gotta stay out of harm’s way. mr. stark gave me an actual mission and it’s terrifying, i have to make sure you stay safe”

legit why the fuck was this old man tryna kill you bro grow up

anyyyywayssss your mom and tony got engaged!!

“wow, i thought the day would never come!!” -you

ppl told you tony isnt your stepdad bc ur mom and him werent married but who tf asked

why is the earth always in fucking danger

you and peter were just vibing on the field trip bus and all the sudden: space donut

“go! i’ll cover for you...FRIDAY, call tony”

“...hi there, little one”

“what the fuck”

“oh, so you see the aliens, too? well, at least im not crazy”

tony stark has left the atmosphere

you and your mom were kinda......not chillin tho

she and you didn’t sleep for a few nights, then ppl just straight up disappeared

plot twist: you survived the snap and your family was lucky to be alive, you even got a little sister who became a big handful!

only bad thing was all your friends dusted and you were pretty lonely

but watching morgan grow up kept you busy

“ahhh, shes so big!”

happy times in bad times

bad times!!!!! bc after five years thanos came back as thanos from like ten years ago. outdated thanos. obsolete thanos.

but you made your first and only appearance in the suit tony actually designed for you many years ago

you should have just stayed home tho bc that fight didnt pass the vibe check

“please dont tell me he...no, no, no, no, no”

you and your mom latched onto each other in tears, tony was one of the best people in your life, he made you and your mom two of the happiest people on earth

best stepdad a kid could ever ask for

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight //

[dekusbrokenarms]

Class 1-A Gender and Sexuality Journey Headcanons

This is mostly just me really liking messy self discovery because I am a messy bitch.

Kyoka Jirou

First off, Kyoka is a trans girl. She socially transitioned when she was really young and began medically transitioning in high school bc her parents are super supportive and great (we stan a supportive parent)

She first thinks she's bi when she's 14 and comes out as such at 15

She dates Kaminari for a while second year and after they break up she's pretty certain she's a lesbian

After high school, she has a couple years where gender is kinda nebulus. For a while thinks she's a nonbinary lesbian but then decides she's just GNC and punk but definitely full girl

She gets more comfortable in her gender after that, but starts questioning her sexuality again

And ends up back at bisexual, but like not attracted to dudes. Girls and nonbinary people only please

Also she and Momo reconnect in their mid twenties and hit it off and get married

Denki Kaminari

Denki is completely comfortable calling himself straight up until he's 17

But don't get it twisted, he definitely was already acutely aware he was into dudes

Because wow boys are pretty

But he also just kind of ignores it because OMFG GIRLS

But after his other friends start coming out, he gets more comfortable thinking about his sexuality but doesn't bother labelling it

Specifically he doesn't want to label it because he gets comfortable with it after her starts dating Kyoka and doesn't want anyone thinking he's calling himself not-straight for dating her

But a couple months after he breaks up with Kyoka, he starts fooling around with Hitoshi and like really he's at the point of no return so he just slaps the bi label on himself and goes about his day

Towards the end of third year, he starts playing around with GNC and really vibes with the genderqueer label, but still uses he pronouns because he's used to them

He and Hitoshi break up after graduation and Denki really throws himself into exploring his gender and sexuality

And starts using he and they pronouns and typically dresses on the masculine side of androgynous but with lots of cool makeup

He gives polyamory a shot, but he keeps finding himself feeling like he's third wheeling other people's relationships and decides its not for them

In their late twenties, he and Hitoshi hook up at a reunion party and hit it off. They keep things casual for several months before suddenly they decide to move in together and in a blink of an eye, they're in a legit committed relationship without knowing how it got there but it feels right to them.

Eijirou Kirishima

No flavor for this one. He figured out he was gay when he was 12 and it stuck. His moms are lesbians and support him wholeheartedly.

Katsuki Bakugou

I think Bakugou also grew up with queer people in his life so he was never really in the closet

He was pretty certain he was asexual and aromantic until Kirishima weedled his way into his heart

At 17, he decides that he's probably demi-pansexual and demiromantic but that feels like too much so he just says queer.

This boy knows all the words though. Keeps very up to date with the local and global state of queer communities but doesn't talk about it unless prompted or provoked

At first he was very private about his relationship with Kirishima because it was no one's fucking business but after seeing the rampant homophobia in the hero business, he became very loud and very proud of his boyfriend very fast

Eijirou and Katsuki probably got married at, like, 21 and did not give one shit when people pointed out they were young. And they're together for the rest of their lives so those fuckers can suck it

Mina Ashido

Mina is your classic bisexual disaster and spends her teens and early twenties going between calling herself straight, bi, and a lebsian depending on who she's currently into because this bitch has zero object permanence

She chills out in her twenties though and is comfortable calling herself bisexual at long last

Hanta Sero

Sero is pretty comfortable being straight right up until all his friends come out

He spends a couple months questioning his sexuality before knowing for certain he's straight

But he's that one straight dude that always ends up dating bi and pan girls by complete happenstance

Hitoshi Shinsou

He really does not know what his sexuality is

Sometimes its yes

Sometimes its no

He says queer because he can't be assed to look into any of the microlabels

He just knows he's not straight and that's good enough for him

Momo Yaoyorozu

This girl is a lesbian but trying to convince herself of that was A PROCESS

She denies it for years and years

Its not until after graduation she thinks, but doesn't dare say, she's bi because she tells herself she's "mostly into guys anyway" so "it doesn't really count"

Slowly her percentage shifts away from guys and to girls

She's 23 before she accepts she's a lesbian

But she doesn't come out until she's 28 because she's scared since her parents expect her to end up with a man

Ochako Uraraka

This girl is mostly into guys. Like she's pretty sure she's straight because all the crushes she had so far have been on boys

When she's 18, she starts to suspect she might like girls too but is really too shy to explore that feeling at first

But when she does? Oh boy she will not stop talking about how wonderful and perfect girls are and how unfortunate her attraction to men is because she feels insecure in her validity as a bisexual woman with a preference for men

Tsuyu Asui

Tsuyu has known she's a lesbian since she was 15 and was very comfortable with that

She questioned if she might be bi a time or two but always came back to being gay

She does realize she's an ace lesbian at 18 though but she's also okay with that

Her goals in life are to own a house by a lake with a beautiful wife

Tenya Iida

Tenya is pansexual

Literally he just cannot see why gender would be a factor in choosing a potential partner

He never came out because he was 20 before he realized that this was not the default state and others weren't just being picky by having a different sexuality

And by then, every knew because he made no attempts to hide his partners

He was really stressed at first about it, and asked Tensei why no one ever told him he should be more careful with publicly showing his sexuality but Tensei was just like "we just thought you knew what you were doing, dude. And it looks like it worked out"

Izuku Midoroya

Again, Izuku is too swept up in "nghh girls pretty" to think too much about his sexuality when he's younger

When he gets a crush on Shouto, he doesn't recognize it as a crush at first because it felt so natural and comfortable and he was used to being uncomfortable around people he liked

So he has a crush on Shouto for years before it hits him: Oh I'm not straight

He stays in that nebulous not-straight state for months because he does not have time to deal with that

But once he stops procrastinating his sexuality, he cannot decide if he's bisexual or pansexual or polysexual and he gets super wrapped up in researching microlabels and its super overwhelming

He even questions his gender for a little bit but settles on he's a cis man pretty quickly

He does eventually start dating Shouto and just calls himself gay for a while because it's easier than trying to piece together ten microlabels like he's tempted to do

However after Shouto begins exploring his gender identity, Izuku gets more comfortable just calling himself pan because he realizes that gender never really played a part in who he likes.

Shouto Todoroki

He came out as gay at 14 to piss off his father depsite the fact he didn't actually have any feelings about his sexuality at the time

No he decided he didn't care what his sexuality was. He was gonna be gay.

And he forgot he did that until he was 17 and was like, oh- I should probably figure out my actual sexuality, after being questioned due to his close relationship with Izuku

So he thought about it for about 15 seconds to say, well, I do like Izuku so I'll just be actually gay now

That stuck until after graduation and into his twenties when he started questioning his gender

He figured out he wasn't particularly attached to masculinity or femininity and found comfort in the agender label

They started using gender neutral pronouns and grew their hair out long but that's really all that changed

They came back to their sexuality after that and decided it was just "men"

Izuku tried to be helpful and offered terms like androsexual, but Shouto didn't find them very useful so they like to tell people their gender is no and their sexuality is dude

It gets the point across

Yuga Aoyoma

Okay, so we all know he’s gay

But despite how flamboyant he is, this boy is a closet case

He definitely had a crush on Izuku first year, but he couldn’t handle that yet so he definitely lived vicariously through Ochako’s crush on him

I don’t think he came out until after high school

And zero people were surprised

He probably does drag too

And he’d look fabulous doing so

Kouji Koda

I think Kouji is ace 

I don’t think this is a word he had for himself until he was in his mid twenties

He just assumed he was a late bloomer and he’d been told he just had a low self esteem

But he finds the ace community and suddenly everything makes sense and he feels comfortable in his own skin

Once that falls into place, he discovers he’s also aromantic

He ends up having a platonic life partner and they have lots of pets and plants together

Fumikage Tokoyami

Fumikage figured out he’s bisexual when interning under Hawks. Like fuck, he had the most embarrassing crush on this guy who’s aesthetic is so embarrassing

I don’t think he had much trouble accepting that he’s attracted to guys though

Like a demon lives in his head

He’s mostly suffering because he has a crush on his cheerful, friendly mentor

Dark Shadow is very happy about this development because it’s a chance to embarrass him and make him uncomfortable

Fumikage gets renewed interest in being able to control Dark Shadow to shut his whore mouth

Unfortunately Dark Shadows outs him to his mentor

Fortunately Hawks is really cool about it and tells DS to have some chill and doesn’t give Fumikage a hard time about it, but Fumikage doesn’t get invited back for another internship with him and finds himself assigned to do work with sidekicks afterwards

Mezou Shouji

Mezou doesn’t fuck with gender

It’s not that he necessarily feels disconnected from his masculinity but rather that he just feels like gender is archaic and useless

So he’s pan and bigender (male and agender)

Definitely would make jokes about be attracted to frying pans and this is how he comes out to Fumikage in their third year. 

Rikidou Sato

Rikidou doesn’t really date in high school

Soon after graduation he ends up in a relationship with a girl that lasts five years before he realizes he’s gay

One time someone tells him he should have known sooner since he likes baking so much and he punches them in the face (I like to imagine this person was Mineta for face punching purposes)

He ends up good pals with the woman he was dating and she’s his maid of honor at his wedding :’)

Tooru Hagakure, and Mashirao Ojiro

I’m sorry if one of them is your fave. They’re both straight and cis and have never questioned it even once. 

[thenakedgingerwrites]

The Love Potion

I had accepted that I was gay around freshman year of high school but had never come out. Now a Junior in college, the only sexual experience I had with a man was letting a guy blow me drunkenly at a random house party. Luckily none of our friends overlapped and a word of the encounter was never uttered. However, it made me crave a man that much more. All that to say, I was a convincing straight guy. Most of my friends were guys, and my closest friends were all guys from my high school football team. Most of them stayed in town to go to the local university like myself, so we stayed close. There were pros and cons to that but the major con was losing the ability to experiment and find my true sexuality without the fear of being rejected by my previous 'life.' My risk aversion was subsiding though. Partly due to the blowjob I got a couple months ago, but mainly due to Ben.

After dorms, a few of my friends got a house together near campus. It was a 5 bedroom house and worked perfectly for us. That is until one of our buddies, for a few personal reasons, dropped out and moved back home with his parents. Luckily we were able to find a couple dudes via craigslist that needed a room for the rest of the year, Ben being one of them. There was another guy that was actually the better candidate between the two, but I had pushed that we give the room to Ben. My friends didn't put up too much of a fuss or pry as to why I think he was the right choice, which I'm grateful for. I don't know how they would have taken my rationale being he was incredibly hot. When I first met Ben that day he was wearing khaki shorts that hugged his thighs and huge bubble butt and a varsity T that molded around his rounded, muscular body. Ben was short, maybe 5'8" or so. Definitely the stocky-muscle type of guy, but had maybe been drinking a little more than he should and going to the gym less. What it created was a slightly curvy but still very attractive body, from what I could tell. His face was his best quality though. Everything about him was puppy dog. He had doughy eyes, pouty lips, and an adorable button nose. Short crew cut and the hint of a shoulder tattoo later, I was lusting for him hard. After he moved in, my fantasies didn't exactly come to fruition as I had imagined. The "bump into him after a shower and his towel falls" scenario didn't happen, and he unfortunately wasn't a guy that liked to get naked for the humor factor as some of my other friends were. He did drink a lot which was maybe a gateway opportunity, but our friend circles were different. I tried to make connections but due to my hidden motives, I would always second guess myself or get too nervous. He was becoming more and more a roommate, and less and less a sex toy. And then one day, during lunch with another one of our roommates, he shared that he was super superstitious. He believed in a natural medicines too. His mom was apparently Wiccan, and although he didn't latch on to the religious side of his mother's beliefs he did believe in 'herbal magic' as he called it. We made fun of him a bit and the three of us laughed it off. The cogs had begun to wirr in my mind though. I could use this, but how? A week of googling and research led me to the idea of a love potion. There were a few different recipes or 'spells' or whatever online, and the lust was clouding my judgement as to whether this was a sound idea or not. There was a moment of doubt during the week but after Ben came in from a run, sweaty and shirtless, his round pecs and keg-abs in perfect view, I was able to wave away any hesitation. It took another week for Ben and I to be the only guys in the house for the evening, and it was now or never. I knocked on his door. There was some rustling, but opened it shortly after. He was already in 'pajamas' which consisted of loose basketball shorts and a tight t-shirt with the words "All American" written on them. "Hey, Matt. What's up?" He asked, leaning on his door frame. I was nervous, but needed to be the perfect actor tonight. "I have a.. er.. well a really random question. And it's kind of stupid." He chuckled a bit. "Okay, shoot." "You mentioned your mom the other week, and it got me curious." "Oh god," he started, rolling his eyes, "I promise I'm not a crazy person." I quickly stopped him. "No, no! That's not what I meant. See, there's this girl in my finance course that I've been crushing on hard. We've talked a few times but I don't know if she's interested. I did some googling and it looks like there's this... Wiccan love potion.." Ben's eyebrows raised, he was curious and amused. "Go on..." I felt like he was just looking for the opportunity to call me the crazy one and laugh this all off, but I continued. "Well, I'm desperate and thought I'd give it a try but could use your help. I know it's stupid, but what's a little science experiment anyway?" I laughed it off, trying to pretend I didn't really believe it would work. Which I didn't, for the record. "Well I wholly believe in that stuff, man. Herbs can be a powerful thing. They can release all sorts of chemicals in your mind to mimic emotions like love, fear, happiness, yadda yadda. Did you get a recipe for it?" I mocked a bit, "Wait, you don't have a family secret there?" We both laughed. "I do actually, and I think I have all I need but wanted you to sanity check it. See if it seems bogus." He agreed, and we went up to my room. I closed the door behind us, while unnecessary it seemed more intimate for me and try my plan. So far it was working, but the real test was yet to come. I shared the ingredients and steps I found online, and he agreed with what it was saying. Rosemary brings out this feeling, and this herb reduces inhibitions, and blah blah crazy person talk. It could have actually been a turn off, but even if I didn't believe an ounce of what was coming out of Ben's mouth he sure did know a lot about this voodoo science. And that was impressive on it's own. We worked the next 20 minutes or so creating this 'love potion.' There were a few electric moments for me like when he would help me grind an herb down and our hands would touch, or he would read out the next step and layer in his own 'professional' opinion. At one point, when he was sitting on the ground with his knees up, his shorts slid up his thigh so much that I wondered if he was even wearing underwear. The thoughts were setting me ablaze inside. When it was finally done, he explained the last steps. "So, you basically just need to add a piece of your hair to some of this, and then somehow get her to drink it." "And then what?" "I guess just wait? I'm not really sure how this concoction will work, it could affect anyone differently." Now to setup my plan. "Now I just need to find a clever way to get her to drink some random, greenish liquid. And it won't even work anyway." "Don't question the juice man, this stuff has enough herbs to turn her on to a cactus." He seemed so serious. "I just wish there was a way to test it. Well, you believe it will work so strongly how about you drink a swig. If you try and kiss me after then I'll know it's legit." Ben just laughed. "If only you could be so lucky!" I pushed it, "No really. You can prove to me that it's real. The effect is only supposed to be temporary right?" Ben got a tad more serious. "Matt, I know it will work. You're the one doubting my skills man." "Okay, you're right. I don't think this can work. I hoped it would, but this shit would be in stores everywhere if it really did." I started to ham up my disappointment. "I don't think the FDA would let it get to there. Plus most people are huge skeptics like you, so no one would buy into it." I looked into his eyes to hold a stare for a beat. "You really do believe in this stuff don't you?" "I do. Well, not all of the Wiccan stuff, but herbs and spices are just science. No need to believe anything." I got some confidence up, acting of course, and wagered with him. "Okay fine, I'll test it out." "With who?" Ben asked, admittedly he actually looked confused. Adorable. "You." He furrowed his eyebrows. "That's not funny, Matt." "No, really. No offense, I don't think I'm going to suck your face after taking a swig of this but I'm willing to take that chance." He chuckled, "that's a risky bet." "I don't think we're eye-to-eye on the odds here Ben." I chuckled back to him. He sighed. "Okay, well don't blame me when you think I'm a total hottie." "Don't worry," I sarcastically retorted, "I won't." Ben took a tiny scoop of the liquid into a measuring cup and plucked out a hair from his head. "You want me to drink your hair?!" I feigned minor disgust. "It need's some DNA. I could put some earwax in there if you'd prefer." I stuck my tongue out and agreed that the hair would suffice. "On second thought..." Ben put the cup down and stood up. He reached into his shorts, to my excitement but composed an expression of confusion, and winced a bit. Removing his hand from his crotch region, he held onto a single pube. He grinned. "Seriously dude, fuck you! I'm not eating your pube. Now I know this is a crock of shit." I didn't know how far to push my aversion but was still afraid of being outed by not having a big enough reaction. "This potion is rooted in sexual urges, and so a hair more closely rooted to sexual connotations should be more potent. You're not scared now are you?" Ben teased. "Scared of choking to death on one of your smelly pubes? Yeah." He held the hair up to his nose and took an exaggerated inhale. "It's not smelly." "Ugh." I rolled my eyes and pretended to dry heave. "You better not tell a soul about this." He mimed his other hand zipping his lips. I sighed, "fine give me your damn pube water potion." "Let me remind you this was your idea." "yeah, yeah yeah..." He added the tiny dark blonde hair into the cup and swirled it around a bit then handed it to me. "Bon appetite," he cheerfully said as he handed me the cup. I took it down in one quick gulp and followed with a few swigs of water we had nearby. It tasted like old rainwater some leaves have been decaying in. "Did it taste romantic?" Ben asked. "It tasted like dead raccoon, but that probably just your pube." We both laughed at the situation. The next minute we sat silently waiting for something to happen. I asked when I would feel this magical urge to kiss him and he shrugged. Works different on every person he said again. "Well, I don't think I find you super sexy. Sorry to ruin your night Ben." "Oh shut up, it's only been a minute. Let's play a game. Simon says." "Seriously?" he lost me. "One of the effects of the potion is that you should be willing to be persuaded by me much easier. What's one thing you would never do, even if I asked you to?" "Ben, I'm not sucking your dick. Sorry bud." Again we both laughed. He continued. "I'm not thinking anything that extreme, but good to know. Me either. Try this, stand up." I got up while acting like I was being pulled up by some ghost. "Oh my god Ben, you're a voodoo god!" "I really am," he said, amused. "Now spin around." I did as was told, still hamming it up. "Jump. Touch your toes. Blink your eyes. Pinch yourself." He had me do routine, mundane tasks for a couple minutes. I stopped pretending a ghost was manipulating me at some point and just did as I was told, kind of forgetting what was going on. Then finally he told me to take off my pants. It snapped me back to consciousness. I pushed back against the command accusing him of just wanting to see my dick and called him a perv. He said, "no, no. Just your sweatpants, you goof." Somehow this made it much more palatable and the pants dropped immediately. I stood there in my t-shirt and boxer briefs staring at Ben for my next move. He stood up, walked over to my bed and plopped down face first. He told me to give him a back massage. I no longer really knew what was me and what was the potion, but I honestly didn't care. I got up on the bed and straddled him. After a few minutes of massaging his back he told me to take off his shirt. I did, then continued the massage. His skin was so smooth and soft under my hands. My own butt resting on his was starting to pool blood to my crotch. "Massage my ass" and I did. I shifted down lower and began to knead his huge bubble butt through his shorts. A minute of this and he told me to strip him completely. He helped a little by arching his back, but the shorts quickly peeled down off his legs revealing his succulent globes just asking for my hands. The massage continued and I enjoyed every second of it. His ass was so warm to my cool hands. It was lightly dusted in dark blond hair but not really hairy like some of the guys I'd see in the locker room. It was definitely the biggest though. As I kneaded his butt, I would get more daring with my movements. I would get closer to his crack but the move away. Timid. I began to turn my kneading movements into spreading ones, exposing his hole a little more each time. My thumbs would rub inward towards his hole when I spread his cheeks. It started subtle, I think, but at some point became very deliberately sexual. I had almost touched his little dark rosebud when he said, "Yep, you're gay for me right now." Startled, I jumped off him and stammered my protest. He rolled his head over and laughed. "It's okay dude, it's the potion. I won't tell anyone." I reiterated, "I"m not gay for you dude. I was just giving you a massage, that's not gay." He looked down, "Your boner begs to differ." I followed his eyes and saw my cock stretching against the elastic of my boxer briefs, slightly peeking above the band. I covered up my shame. "I"m not gay" I said again. "I know, Matt. But for the sake of our deal, I've gotta do this." I was about to ask “do what?” but he beat me to it. He turned over to reveal his semi-hard cock and balls, nestled in a light patch of dark blonde hair. "Suck my dick." I instantly remembered that when I drank the potion this is exactly what I said I wouldn't do. However at this point Ben seemed confident that the potion was in complete control and I could finally live out my fantasy without any repercussion. I didn't hesitate. I got back on the bed and shoved my face into his crotch. I hadn't sucked a cock before, and honestly hadn't even been this close to another dick in my life. Ben wasn't fully hard yet, but I could already tell he was bigger than me. Probably only about 6 or 7 inches long like me but much thicker. His balls were larger too. I wondered how I would fit it in my mouth if it kept growing but accepted the challenge. I used one hand to guide his member into my mouth. I only took a couple inches in to wet it with saliva. He tasted so good. Slightly salty but a pretty neutral flavor overall. For some reason I had imagined a cock would taste just like what cum smelled like. I was happy to see it was far less extreme. As I whetted him fully and began to pump him while I swirled my tongue around his head, Ben began to get audible. He started with just some sighs and moans, but quickly began to give me specific directions. "Jack me harder, lick my shaft, suck my balls, swirl your tongue, deep throat me." His hands began to guide my head as well. I gladly took the direction. He had gotten fully erect by now. I came up for air to admire his cock. I was right about it's size. It may even be a bit shorter than mine, but boy was it thick. Although it realistically couldn't have been as thick as a soda can, it looked like it without a direct comparison. "Don't stop Matt!" Ben looked down at me during my break and quickly got me back on task. I sucked and pumped him but I wanted a little more. I took a creative liberty and started to trail my mouth downward. I had seen in hundreds of porn clips guys eating out another guy's ass. I'd never had it done to me to validate if it felt as good as porn made it seem, but wanted to test it out on Ben. I don't think the thought would have crossed his mind, but once I began sucking on his taint and still moved south he got the hint and silently complied. Ben arched back and raised his legs and ass up into the air. I kept one hand firmly around his cock and jacked him off as my tongue made it's fast approach to Ben's virgin asshole. The taste was unique. He had clearly showered some point in the evening, but still I thought it would taste a little like, well, shit. I was delighted to discover it didn't. It almost tasted like a sweet cologne. There was a musky quality but also a sweet aroma. I mimicked all the actions I'd seen in porn. I licked his hole, spat on it, sucked on it. Ben seemed to like just the simple lick the most, and so I focused on that. It didn't take long into this new experience for him to reach climax. His breathing began to speed up and he breathed/growled, "I'm gonna cum." I had a conflict of interest. I had never seen another guy cum in real life, and wanted to watch him erupt all over himself for my viewing pleasure. I also had never tasted another man's cum before, and the thought of taking his explosion into my mouth was incredibly hot too. It was a split second decision, but I threw his hips back down to the bed and wrapped my lips around his cock. Ben tried to push my head off him and breathed a "no, you don't have.." but I swatted him away and brought him to the point of orgasm. He went past the moan decibel and actually yelled in pleasure as he erupted into the back of my throat. The warm, sticky liquid shot ribbon after ribbon against the back of my mouth. I attempted to swallow between bursts but turns out swallowing when there's a cock in your mouth is hard or at least it was for me, so some of his seed dripped out of my mouth and down his shaft. I milked every ounce out of him, and even squeezed his cock like a toothpaste tube to get the last few drops. Ben's intensely tense, and sweaty body turned to putty after a few shudders. I sucked on his cock for another minute or so as it waned in my mouth. Finally accepting that my fun was done for the night, I let it pop out of my mouth. Ben arched up on his elbows. "You have a nice dick." I said, smiling. He chuckled, "that's the potion talking, but thanks." The potion. I had forgotten. Ben read the look but mistook it for more of a panic. He leaned up and grabbed his shorts from the floor, quickly slipping them on. Grabbing his shirt he said, "I should go take a shower. I'm really sorry about this." I tried to stop him but he was out my door and down the stairs in a blink. I just laid there on my bed staring up at the ceiling. My first time sucking a cock was amazing, and of all people it was with Ben: my ultimate fantasy man. I heard the water turn on from the shower the floor below, and took the opportunity to finally pleasure myself. I imagined Ben in the shower and replayed the last hour in my head. I came with more force and volume than I had, maybe ever. I cleaned myself and my room up, and waited to walk down and approach Ben. I finally got the courage a couple hours later but when I approached his room I could tell the lights were off and turned back. I'm not sure if I'd ever get that chance again with Ben. One thing for sure though, I was 100% addicted to dick and needed more. I had lived 21 years without it and had all that time to make up for. How I was going to get it, would be another adventure.

[with-love-anu]

Desiderata: When The Heart Speaks

PART: 8

WORD COUNT: 1.7K

PAIRING: Sirius Black x Reader

SUMMARY:  You had been best friends with James, Remus, Sirius and Peter. Read your journey of love, friendship and jealousy through your wonderful years at Hogwarts. Enjoy!

SERIES MASTERLIST

Sirius was being different. Not that you didn’t like it, but it was new. He had started to call you “my love” which never failed to make you blush. He had stopped flirting with anyone else all together and was directing every bit of his attention towards you. And you were over the moon. You couldn’t stop smiling, giggling as Sirius flirted with you. So, you did the only thing you could think of. You flirted back.

The first time you did it, you saw Sirius’s eye’s widen as a deep red colour tinted his cheeks and neck. He stuttered, amusing you, before muttering some lame excuse and leaving as fast as possible. Your cheeks hurted from how wide you grinned. Lily beside you, eyed you with raised eyebrows, giving you a knowing expression. James and Remus were splayed on the floor laughing so hard they had tears in their eyes. Did you just see your best friend, supposed playboy of the damn school blush and stutter nervously because you flirted with him? More importantly; did he start considering you more than a friend? Did you actually have a chance with him?

It took a while, before Sirius stopped blushing uncontrollably whenever you flirted back. This had been going on for months now. The two of you would tease each other; but it never went more than that. You actually wondered whether this was a part of some big joke. James and Remus continually assured you that it wasn’t.

***

“My love, did you even eat this morning?” Sirius asked concerned as you entered the history of magic classroom out of breath. Your heart gave a flutter. You had overslept and hardly had the time to take a shower before rushing for your first class.

“No. I overslept.” You said sitting down beside him.

“Here, I saved some muffins for you”

He offered you your favorite, blueberry and banana flavored cakes. You beamed at him.

“Why, thank you!” you said in a flirty tone taking one and eating it discreetly to make sure not to get the attention of your seemingly, ever-tired professor.

“Anything for you babe;” he said lowly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

You gulped. He looked at you like he was going to kiss you. You stared at him, his grey eyes looking at you so intensely, it made your heart rate spike up. You were sure that Sirius who was sitting at quite a distance could hear your heart beat. He moved forward, and placed a kiss on your cheek making you look away. You blushed. Hard. You looked forward trying to listen to the professor (or attempting to).

As he droned on and on about goblin wars, you felt Sirius’s hand cover your own. You smiled. You shifted closer to him and heard him suck a breath. Your thighs were touching and your arms were over each other. You pursed your lips to stop grinning. You could see Sirius at the corner of your eyes having a smirk on his face even though his cheeks were tinted pink. Throughout the lesson you were torn between wanting it to end as soon as possible; so that you could stop yourself from yanking his face towards you kissing him until you were both breathless and wanting it to last forever; to stay close to him in case he didn’t want what you did.

When the lesson ended James put an arm around you catching up.

“Have fun in the class?” he asked the two of you wriggling his eyebrows. Both of you flushed. Sirius slapped away his arm from around you put his own. You raised your eyebrows at the gesture and rolled his eyes playfully.

***

“Y/n!!” Sebastian grinned beside you as the two of you worked on ancient runes in the quiet library. “So, Sirius huh?” he said wriggling his eyebrows.

“Ahhhh…” you groaned as you face palmed. Sebastian chuckled.

“It’s okay… I’ll find a place to repair my broken heart!” he sniffed, wiping away a fake tear from his face.

“Awww” you gawked lovingly. “You’ll always be my favourite man!!” you said bumping your shoulder with his. He bumped yours in return. You giggled.

“What are you doing?” a voice came behind you.

You turned to see Sirius. His jaw was clenched and if looks could kill, Sebastian would be dead twice over.

“Studying. Runes.” Sebastian replied gesturing towards the books.

“We are done, actually. So Y/n,” he said turning towards you. “I’ll be taking my leave. Don’t forget the charms lesson tomorrow. Bub-Bye!”

“Sure. Bye.” You watched him as he packed his books to leave. Sirius was beside you fuming silently. You bit your cheeks to stop smiling. It was fun to see Sirius jealous. It was adorable, actually. It reminded you of an angry kitten.

After he left, you gestured Sirius to sit beside you. After all you still had work left. He sat beside you opening and closing his mouth frequently. You sighed.

“You could say what you want Sirius, it’s just me.” You said not looking at him.

He cleared his throat before speaking.

“I didn’t know Sebastian,” he spat his name, “and you were so close”

You looked up at him. You were shocked to find vulnerability in his eyes.

“Sirius,” you started wanting to clear any confusion. “Sebastian is a friend. Only a friend. We tease each other for fun. There is nothing between us. Ever was or will be.”

Sirius looked at you as if trying to determine whether you were being honest. He took a deep breath.

“Yaa… I knew that” he said as if it didn’t matter reading the book in front of him.

“Of course not! You weren’t jealous at all” you said smirking making Sirius stutter yet again.

***

The party was in full swing. Everyone from different houses fifth year and above had come and were having fun of their lives. You wore a black dress that hugged your curves perfectly, hiding what you didn’t want to show displaying your best features. You had curled your hair and applied a bit of makeup too. Lily whistled as she saw you. As you both went down arm in arm you tried to spot your besties. To say Sirius way surprised would be an understatement. His mouth legit dropped when he saw you.

Remus nudged him saying, “Close it, or a fly would enter in”

He stumbled and stuttered, gulping before finally saying, “You look gorgeous”

“Thank you, you don’t look bad either.” You said smiling.

You spent the rest of the evening dancing with Sirius. Man! Did he know how to move! Placing his hands over your hips, your arms around your neck; you swayed to the beats of music. You were hyperaware of the places he was touching you. Your body bloomed with heat and your heart never calmed down. Sirius gazed at you as if you were the only person in the whole wide world. He felt the same.

You were broken out of your trance, as someone spilled something over you. Shit! Your skirt was soaked.

“Fuck- why don’t you clean this up while I wait for you?” Sirius asked solemnly.

You nodded as you went to your dorm muttering some cleaning and drying spells. Once satisfied you went down looking for Sirius.

You gasped as you saw him. He was kissing Marlene. Tears prickled your eyes as your whole body turned rigid. Of-course it was a game to him. Your head felt like it would burst. You turned and ran into your dorm bathroom. No reason for anyone to see you like this. You put a hand over your mouth trying to muffle your screams. You plopped on the cold tiles as you sobbed uncontrollably, your body shaking. It hurt. It hurt so damn much. Sirius never loved you, he never could, he never would. Those jealous girls from the bathroom were right, you were nothing more than a new conquest. You heard knocking outside your door.

“Y/n!! open up, let me explain.” Sirius shouted.

You tried to breathe, but couldn’t do anything except whimpering a bit more.

“NO!” you screamed.

“Y/n, please!” Sirius pleaded.

“Why are you even here? You broke my heart, made a fool out of me; what more do you want? You knew I loved you still you played this bloody game with me!” You shouted.

“Y/n, after all this time, you still don’t know I love you?” Sirius said sucking a breath.

That cleared your mind. He loved you-?

“What?” you croaked.

“Bloody hell Y/n! I am head over heals in love with you, can’t you see? Please, please open up!” he begged.

You wiped your tears and slowly opened the door. Sirius looked at you and cupped your face. He took you to your bed making you sit down.

“Marlene was drunk. I went to take some butterbeer for ourselves and she came out of nowhere and kissed me. I pushed her away as soon as I could grasp what was happening.” He gulped. “I love you. Have for a while now. Even when I didn’t know it. Loving you is like breathing, comes to me naturally and I couldn’t live without it.”

“I love you Sirius,” you said softly looking at him. You were entranced. You both were. Neither of you breaking the long stare. The feelings so long hidden bursting around you. Sirius leaned in. He kissed your forehead. Then your nose. He started peppering kisses along your cheeks, chin and jaw. His hands held you close as your heart pounded violently. He pulled away, cupping your face. He moved closer brushing his lips against yours. There was something about you that made him feel like an inexperienced nervous child dealing with his first relationship. You pressed your lips firmly against him, finally kissing him. He kissed back, fervently as if the moment would break soon and he would have to go back to the unwanted reality. You dragged your tongue against his bottom lip as he moaned and let you in. It felt like a high you never experienced. The two of you kissed passionately, neither wanting to stop. Sirius pulled away as you both heaved breathing.

“Sirius,” you said holding his hand. “Never leave me.”

“Not in a million lifetimes.” He promised.

[nsheetee]

Can I make a request? Jaehyun x reader high school rivalry au. In which Jaehyun & reader are rivals in school when it comes to academics but one day they were informed they had to team up for a quiz bee against other schools. Some sort of enemies to lovers au I guess? 😅 THANK YOUUU!!

a/n: ugh I imagined Jaehyun in glasses throughout this entire thing and it killed me 😅 also, to include the academics and quiz bee part I wrote this based around debate team, that wasn’t exactly what you asked for but I hope it’s okay! 

(warning: mentions of doyoung, jungwoo, and sicheng  /swearing / y’all make out a bit in the end)

alright so let me tell you about your high school’s debate team

the team is as old as the school itself, but during doyoung’s sophomore year, he was given the title of president of the debate team 

(the first time a sophomore has been given the position, and he made sure everyone knew about it too dfbhjh)

every since then, the team has TAKEN OFF and made some amazing accomplishments 

doyoung crafted the team into what it is today

sicheng as head of research (and official tea-spiller of the team)

jungwoo as doyoung’s assistant (a.k.a. doyoung’s emotional support boy)

…and you and jaehyun, some of the best debaters doyoung has ever seen

your passion paired with jaehyun’s charisma and mixed in with both of your quick mouths was a sight to behold for judges

despite this, doyoung was very unwilling to let both of you stay on the team

because you fucking HATED each other

despite the amazing skill of teamwork you both possess on stage, the debate team meeting room was a nightmare

screaming matches every other day

snapped in half pencils

many, many, MANY disagreements

and how did it start? 

during freshman year, your first class in your first semester of school was math- your teacher seated you next to jaehyun :)

every morning at 8am you had to deal with his whining about being tired or how the material was “too easy” :)

and then when you got your first tests back, your grade was one (1) point lower than his :)

and jaehyun says :)

“oh man, that sucks. you should’ve taken up that tutoring offer I gave you”

:))))))))))

and ever since then, you couldn’t stand his big head with his too-clear-to-be-natural skin and his smile that he sent you every time doyoung agreed with something he said instead of one fo your ideas

but you loved debate team, you were all such close friends (despite someone who liked the act up) and those big dumbos were your everything :’)

now, it was the beginning of doyoungs senior year

as the debate team teacher sponsor quietly cried at the thought of doyoung leaving, doyoung was more focused on who would take his spot next year

jungwoo and sicheng were both great candidates, but everyone knew that the only people who could even come close to filling doyoung’s shoes were you or jaehyun

and when doyoung told you both this after a debate team meeting, the tension between you two quickly escalated 

“now, I expect both of you to get along; at least respect each other. if one of you is the captain then you have to be able to listen to them and right now…. the last thing you do is listen to each other” doyoung explained

with that thought, you and jaehyun made your way out of school

“ya know if you could just listen to my ideas every once in a while maybe we wouldn’t be in this kind of mess” jaehyun pointed out as you walked down the empty halls

“I could say the same thing to you” you snapped back and he suddenly stopped walking

“… is this what doyoung is talking about? I think… we both love debate so much, that we just don’t know when to stop” jaehyun laughs and you feel slightly uncomfortable with this seemingly truthful side of jaehyun

he legit doesn't seem like he’s about to laugh at your face 

he just seems like he wants to stop arguing

he does, he’s actually really tired of arguing with your cute face everyday :(

you don’t know how far you can trust jaehyun, but you’ve spent years working by his side

there has to be some sort of connection between you two that allows both of you to work together so successfully

after you tell that to jaehyun, he slowly agrees

“how about this….” you start “after team meetings, we can go to the library and try to… not hate each other”

jaehyun scrunches his face

“the library? how about… the cafe two blocks down?”

you were about to snap at him about “what’s so wrong with the library? huh?” but you took a deep breath in and out

if you were going to stop fighting, change had to start somewhere

“okay, let’s go” 

so you and jaehyun hang out at this hole-in-the-wall cafe after debate team meetings for a few weeks

you didn’t necessarily make your meet ups known to the other team members but… 

you didn’t really want to have the whole team freak out over what could possibly be perceived as dates

cuz trust me

they TOTALLY looked like dates

jaehyun would buy your drink for you 

(until one day he confessed that you drink was hella expensive and you rolled your eyes and started buying his drink from then on)

in return, he would help you on all the math concepts you didn’t fully understand

(you had flashbacks to the first class you had with him when he offered to tutor you but you shook that off)

and when your your brain was completely fried, he would listen to you talk about anything and everything

or if on one particular day you weren’t in the mood to talk, he would fill up the cafe with his low laughter and stories of the stupid things he and his friends do

(when the baristas found out y’all weren’t dating they started making bets on when one of you would confess ewfheb)

your relationship with jaehyun changed from snappy and argumentative to something like a friendship

and this was obvious to the rest of the debate team members 

they were soooo relieved that y’all weren’t fighting everyday 

and that they could spend the meetings getting prepared for competitions rather than settling your arguments

but of course, sicheng was a little too curious about the sudden change in behavior from you two

and he followed you guys after a meeting one day

he watched from outside of the cafe where neither of you could see him

he was shooooook

you guys looked so,,.., weird when you don’t fight but it was even weirder to see you laughing at something jaehyun said and leaning into him as you looked at his papers

he was ssososososoos sure you were dating

(although sicheng was awesome at researching stuff, he seems to have forgotten to confirm his sources on this one…)

(because you were not dating at all)

(yet…)

sooooooo fast forward to the next weekend, there was a debate team competition a few cities away

the school allowed the team to travel and stay over night at a hotel in that city

so the team packed up their things and took the long bus ride and settled into their hotel rooms once they got there

you were flipping through the tv channels in your room when your phone vibrated

with a text from jaehyun

“come meet me in my room”

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) hehe

it was against the rules that your teacher sponsor set before you left for the trip

but you were sure the teacher was already passed out in their own room and that if you were quiet and careful, the other team members wouldn’t hear you walking out of your room and into jaehyun’s

jungwoo, doyoung, and sicheng already broke the rule that the teacher had set for them

they were chilling in doyoung’s room, finished take out on the floor between them and face masks on as they relaxed 

“I keep texting jaehyun to come join us, but he’s not picking up” jungwoo frowned and sicheng snorted at that

“what’s so funny?” jungwoo asked

“we’re on a trip away from home with our own hotel rooms and little to no supervision,..,.. don’t you think jaehyun and y/n would take this opportunity to mess around?”

the room suddenly went very quiet as jungwoo and doyoung stared at sicheng with wide eyes

“…what?” doyoung asked lowly

“oh come on…. you guys seriously can’t tell me you haven’t seen how much closer they’ve gotten-”

“that’s because I told them that one of them would have to be president next year and they need to get along” doyoung defended

“yeah, that’s why they were getting real cozy with each other in a cafe after one of our meetings” sicheng absentmindedly stated, looking at his reflection on his phone as he tapped around his face to settle the mask in

tea? spilled

sicheng’s job? completed

jaehyun and you? in trouble

back in jaehyun’s room, you quietly close the door behind you as you make your way in

jaehyun lays on his bed with only the light from the bedside lamp illuminating his face 

his pajamas have little clouds and sheep on them and you take a moment to tease him about it as you come closer

he grabs your hands and pulls you onto the bed next to him and you both settle down to watch tv

both of your hearts are pounding so loud you think the other can hear it and you squeeze your hand into a fist to keep yourself from physically freaking out

jaehyun was right there… right next to you

if you turned your head, he would be only a few inches away

“there’s nothing to watch?” you ask, trying to get your mind off of your thoughts

“nothing seems interesting… let’s do something else instead”

and that’s how you end up making out with Jaehyun :-)

your lips are moving against each others and your hands are gliding down to wherever you can touch

he rubs your sides and when you react with a small moan he pushes you down and the kiss turns from a “wanting” type of kiss to something slower

like jaehyun wants to savor this moment of your kiss pressed to his for the very first time (it wasn’t the greatest setting or situation for a first kiss but hey, y’all take what you can get)

you barely notice doyoung, jungwoo, and sicheng storming into the room, turning on all the lights and standing in front of the bed, hands on hips or crossed in front of their chest, their face masks still on and frowns settled underneath

you and jaehyun separate from each other in fright, awaiting to be yelled at by doyoung, but instead you break out into laughter at the appearance of the three of them standing in front of you

“when I told you guys to get along, this is NOT AT ALL what I meant”

[wezzaner]

Evie’s and Doug’s relationship develops the best, Pt. 2

So, here I go:

So, picking up from where Pt.1 left off, Evie and Doug made up after the coronation and before the after party.

In Descendants 2, their relationship took the backseat to all the Mal/Ben drama, mostly Mal, Ben was a total idiotic care bear. And that’s okay, I am not complaining at all about Devie being somewhat benched. This is like Disney channel having its own trope of sidelining characters, story arcs and plot lines or just disregarding them completely.

Not the first time, won’t be the last. You get used to it, eventually. (Salty at High School Musical 13 years later, yes, that’s who I am)

You know, as they did with Evie’s intelligence, boxing her into the fashion corner only. Which I enjoyed, but there’s more to Evie than that and she could be both. And they butchered her further in Descendants 3, more on that later as well.

Also, unpopular opinion, Evie and Carlos are much better lead characters with better arcs and Jay fucking deserved better. Mal can go suck it.

Anyway, back to the topic:

Jumping six months later, Evie and Doug are running a business together from her dorm room. Her designing and him handling her finances, you know, like the power couple that they are. Right off the bat, couple goals already.

Which should show how much they both do trust each other.

That should be surprising, given who their parents are. Again, everyone seems to forget that out of all the AKs/VKs couples shown in the movies, only Doug’s and Evie’s actually come from the same story. They should be enemies. They should not be trusting each other so much to the point where they share a business, let alone be in love. That, I suspect, might have slowed their relationship progress a bit. And it’s a very legit reason to be wary of someone.

Scenes breakdown:

Now, their first scene together hits with a banger right away, them sharing an inside joke.

Six months into their (unlabeled?) relationship, Doug is shown to still be insecure about being with her. Actually, about HER being with him. Again, Evie is royal (whether Audrey likes it or not), she is ambitious, hardworking and will go places. And he’s, well...

Doug.

He’s telling her that through her hard work and dedication to her craft, she could be getting everything she had always wanted after all without needing a prince or marrying into it as she was bred and conditioned by her mother to do. That she can get there on her own and she doesn’t need to be a trophy wife. Also, offhandedly telling her that he will help her get there, that they could get there together.

And her tender, reassuring reply is that she doesn’t need a prince because she has him. Like, come on, that’s all the vindication anyone would ever need.

I mean, I would love for someone, anyone, to look at me the way Evie looks at him at that moment. Like, boy, you got nothing to worry about, not one thing. Just look at her face, please.

Honestly, in less than thirty seconds, their relationship progressed more than Mal’s and Ben’s relationship did in that entire movie. I mean they had a conflict and they solved it in half a minute while Mal spent the entire movie erasing everything good about her already-established character. Ben deserves better.

So, moving on.

The next development in their relationship arc comes in a scene with no Evie whatsoever. Doug encounters Jay and Carlos and asks if they had seen Evie. Let’s break this one down, yeah?

Doug is shown to be insecure about being the lesser of the two in his relationship with Evie and believes she deserves better. He is not the most confident individual, directly in contrast with Evie, who has this ridiculously confident aura around her.

And Jay and Carlos lying to him about Evie’s whereabouts couldn’t have helped. Especially because I believe at that point, Doug had become friends with Jay and Carlos to some degree. He wasn’t only questioning his relationship with Evie, but his friendship with Jay, Carlos and by association, possibly, Mal.

So, anyway, the crew got King Care Bear back and they arrive to Auradon prep the next morning. And Doug shows up, bowtie gone, disheveled and sleep-deprived to question whether Evie was seeing someone else or not.

He was in panic over this, and she replies earnestly that she wasn’t, in fact, seeing someone else and she was on the isle with the crew saving Ben. And kind of calls him stupid for ever thinking that.

And Doug doesn’t even care about the whole Ben thing. which I find awfully hilarious.

To sum up:

Slow progress aside, Doug believed in Evie’s business, creativity and ability to be financially stable enough to buy her own castle before it even crossed her own mind. Just because he knew it was something she always wanted. He supported her wholeheartedly, to the point where he was okay working with her, handling finances and deliveries. And probably investing as well. 

The movie did go over Doug’s very obvious insecurities when it comes to his relationship with her. Made it obvious that he was flawed, normal and human, more so than any of the other characters. He gets jealous because he sees himself as the less in the relationship and his reaction is justified, to be honest.

I mean, this is Evie we’re talking about. One doesn’t just LET Evie go, that’s stupid. You don’t lose people like her. No one deserves Evie, she’s too good for all of them. But it’s not about deserving.

I believe they were already in love at this point (such a healthy relationship, too), but reached a mutual mental (or off-screen, really) decision to buckle down, take things slow and see where things go. This is because of who they are and how they came to be, not because of anything else. Actual brain cells, here.

And not everyone is Mal and Ben. Nothing against them, but they are under pressure, with their relationship being public and all. There’s always a sense of urgency with those two.

And with these gifs I rest my case:

Off topic, but please!!

Has anyone noticed that, aside from being a movie musical, Did I Mention and Be Our Guest are the only canon-confirmed numbers? Be Our Guest was performed for family day as some form of (cringe) entertainment.

BUT Did I Mention is the only one that was deadass performed into a legit microphone? And then rearranged for the proposal. Am I the only one seeing Ben rushing out from the dressing room before the game to find Doug to ask him if he could have the band play it after the game? And then a year later gathering everyone else, letting them know he was proposing and then being all like; “Doug, I need you.”

 Doug is Ben’s wing man, and that is that.

[canaryatlaw]

alright, well today was interesting. I woke up in kind of a funk, but right before waking up I’d had what seemed like a lengthy and detailed dream about my high school best friend. I have recurring dreams about her, basically the only recurring dreams I have (I used to get ones where I was driving a car and trying to brake but the brakes wouldn’t work, but they stopped years ago) but they’d been markedly less in the past few years, so it was fairly rare at this point to happen. And it just made me sad, because the dream always involves us making up in some way, and I woke up feeling an aching for something i know isn’t going to ever happen. It’s frustrating to have moved on in every possible aspect of my life (it was 8 years ago ffs) but my subconscious still seems focused on it, and idk what to do about it. So that kinda sucked. But I woke up to my alarm at 11, got ready and got an uber to go to the allergist by 11:30 to make it there for my 12:30 appointment since the drive is a bit of a hike. Made pretty good time and got there with a few minutes to spare, the last time I’d gotten caught in traffic and ended up being late, which of course bothers me to no end. They got me in with the doctor pretty quickly and we talked about what’s been going on since my last visit and that I’d basically surmised my legs get super itchy after shaving, and it didn’t go away when I switched from using shaving cream to a razor with the soap bars on the end. so we ended up doing a patch test to test for allergies to different types of metals, apparently razors can be made from a combination of different metals and alloys so it could take some time to figure out. The patch test thing is basically they taped three patches to my back which have to remain there for 48 hours, then I’ll come back and see what the results are. So we finished up there, the first thing I did upon exiting the building was call my chiropractor because I was supposed to have an appointment at 3 today but being that I had the patches on my back I didn’t think going to get my back cracked and then working in PT was a good idea, so I’m set to go back to the allergist on Thursday and after that go to the chiropractor. I did an uber pool home to try to save some money now that I didn’t have a pressing obligation I needed to get back to, and the ride was actually fairly short, so that was good. Once I got home I picked up some packages I had and dealt with them, then spent a while facetiming one of my twitter friends which was fun. At some point I got an email back from a potential job asking for an interview for Friday, so we set that up, and then they sent me a court opinion and asked me to read it before coming in, and if I had any questions to let them know before then. This is a job I actually applied for like two weeks ago and was hoping to hear back from, it’s actually in Evanston which is technically closer to me than downtown so that could work, and the work is helping write appeals for individuals who have had their disability benefits wrongfully terminated, so that’s definitely something I could get passionate about. So I read the opinion and didn’t really have any burning questions, but figured I should come up with a few that try to communicate I understood what was going on, so I’ll probably do that tomorrow. I stayed on my computer for a while until it was time for The Flash season finale. Overall I thought the episode was alright, not the most riveting of finales but it definitely had it’s good moments, I thought the plot with Wells/Thawne in the future was very well done (and even though I know their future is supposed to be very dystopian, I can’t help but be disturbed by the fact that all these years later the death penalty still exists) and they explained it a lot better because last week I didn’t have any clue what was going on with it, lol. The Nora stuff I was kinda meh on, just not really feeling it. but yeah, it was okay. After that I watched the new episode of Blackish, which I’ve never watched before, because Brandon was going to be in the episode, so I had to watch for him. It was actually really enjoyable, I liked it a lot and two of my tweets about the show got liked by the show’s writer’s twitter account so they’ve been blowing up with likes and retweets all night. Brandon was only in one scene but he played it perfectly and was excellent as always. After that I switched to 9-1-1 since I missed that last night, I knew since it was the season finale it was gonna be dramatic but oh man, this show really does get me in tears every damn week. The plot with the mail bombs had been laid so well earlier in the season to all come together very nicely in the final episode, and you better believe I was in tears watching the community members stepping up and helping lift the fallen fire truck off of Buck while everyone was watching on tv, because that shit always gets me and I’m legit tearing up just thinking about it. so yeah, I appreciate this show for the drama that it is and I’m looking forward to the next season. After that I switched over to netflix and watched a few episodes of Dead To Me, and I ended up getting up to the last episode before calling it a night. During most of this time I ended up frantically searching through my emails to try to find a confirmation email about our flight to New York next weekend, which just was not there and google flights had it shown as I had looked at the flights but never actually booked them but I KNOW I did (well, technically, Jess knew I did) so I ended up calling my dad and having him look up the credit card statement, and thankfully the charge was there in the right place, and I scrolled back in Jess and I’s messages to the day they were purchased and found a message indicated for some reason I had ended up booking them by phone for no reason I can recall at all, and apparently wrote nothing down, which was very weird, but I was just glad we found them, especially because these flights had gone up $300 since we purchased them. I’m probably going to call Spirit tomorrow and ask them to give me the details so I can at least see the reservation online and have info about it, so hopefully that will work. And yeah, once I finished the second to last episode I got in the shower, which proved to be a bit of an event since I wasn’t supposed to like, get water directly on my back where the patches are (it was okayed to shower but to try not to get them too wet) so I ended up trying to wash my hair with my head forward and my hair facing upwards towards the shower head, which was...interesting and I ended up finding a patch of hair after I had gotten out that was still very soapy, so I had to fix that lol but other than that it worked for the most part. And yeah, now I’m here. Got the psychiatrist tomorrow, not too early of an appointment but I’m dead tired because it took me forever to fall asleep last night so I’m gonna call it a night now. Goodnight my dears. Sweet dreams.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #198

“i woke up on the wrong side of my floor.”

What do you get tired of having to explain? It's not something asked frequently at all, but since I had to to new doctors and ER workers etc., I'm not a fan of re-telling the break-up story with Jason. What perk of being “grown up” lived up to your childhood expectations? Independence, though I. Don't act on it much with my dependent ass. Who is your least favorite character in the last show you watched? Shoot me, Sara and Con, but so far Zuko as a villain doesn't impress me. If you weren’t in a relationship with your significant other (or last) and you met them for the first time tonight, would you hook up with them? I wouldn't "hook up" with anyone. Is there a place that makes you sad to return to? It's just better for me to stay away from the place Jason and I took our first prom pictures. I actually returned there last fall to take pictures however; I was fine, but it still felt weird. What is the most morally questionable thing that you’ve done? Idk. Has anyone ever surprised you by changing when you didn’t believe that they could? Dad, 100%. What is the best advice a sibling has given you? Something from Ashley regarding the break-up when I was starting to recover, but I can't remember exactly what. Was there an opportunity that you feel like you missed out on in high school? Hm... thought about this quite a bit, and I actually don't think so? I mean I wish my mental health had been better, but I overall had a fair experience. What was the biggest lie you’ve told a significant other? Idk, it's just about impossible for me to tell an s/o a serious lie; or small ones, for that matter. Maybe that I wasn't mad about something when I was? Idk. Have you ever treated someone badly because someone else treated you badly? I'm sure I have at some point, just not deliberately. What is your favorite lyric from your favorite band? Don't- What is the worst thing you’ve said or done while PMSing? Boy, I've done some dumb shit. Probably self-harm (no, it's not something I do now). Did you have an irrational childhood fear? Oh, I'm sure. None are coming to me now... Well, do you consider serious separation anxiety "irrational?" Do you and your significant other have ‘a song’? What is it? Oh boy, a lot. "Pretty Woman" by Van Halen and Paramore's "The Only Exception" get me the most, though. Do you ever give things away to your friends? Don't really have anyone to do that with. Is there anyone’s friendship or relationship, in particular, that makes you jealous? Nope. Well, it'd be absolutely incredible to have a friendship (so in this case, not counting Sara) like Rhett and Link. I'm not even remotely kidding, they were the ones that made me question my former, humiliating outlook on homosexuality because my heart just yelled at me to ship them & I still do lol. Do you have anyone’s tweets sent directly to your phone? Whose? No. Have you ever caused a lot of noise in a library? No. Do you complain a lot? Eh, depends on the day and subject. Have you ever been to a music festival? Yes, but only to take pictures for a photography class. What was the last thing that completely took your breath away? The blood wolf moon. I stayed up 'til like, 2-3-something to see totality, and it was fucking incredible. I hadn't seen a full lunar eclipse since I was a kid. If your life was a movie, what would it be rated? R, probably... mostly due to excessive cursing lmao. Are you more of a talker or a listener? A listener. Have you ever called in at a radio station & dedicated a song to someone? No. Would you ever go to a protest or be involved in a protest? Sure. When playing rock, paper, scissors which do you usually pick? I think scissors. Have you ever tried to write a book? Yes. Have you ever been hit by a chunk of hail? Maybe a small one? Would you ever try any extreme sports? No. Is it true that if you don’t love yourself, you can’t love another? I've always found that idea as absolute and utter bullshit. Do you ever try making your dream up before falling asleep? I just daydream; I don't like, actively hope it'll transfer into a legitimate dream. Ever been on a golf cart? Yes. Have you ever slapped someone in the face? No. Last person you took a nap with? Sara. Are you embarrassed by anything you have in your bedroom? No. Is your last ex currently in a relationship? Not to my knowledge. Has anyone ever given you roses? Yeah. Would you rather have your parents catch you having sex or smoking weed? asjfpawe quite honestly, smoking weed. The former would probs kill me. Do you owe anybody money? No. How many times have you gotten into a argument with the last person you kissed? Now as adults and not stupid kids, just a handful. Maybe just one or two serious ones. What’s the most positive thing anyone has ever said about you? When I actually had a brain, compliments I got regarding my intelligence meant a lot. Maybe there's something else, but that's just the first that came to mind. What’s the most positive thing you would say about yourself right now? I'm very empathetic and care a lot about cheering people up. Have you ever been to church? What was it like? I grew up going to church, and at no point in my life did I enjoy it. When I was old enough to not be forced to go, I quickly stopped, even when I was still religious. What’s your favorite thing to do on a sunny day? If it's not hot, swim. How many different drugs have you tried? None that weren't prescription. List each drug, and how it made you feel. N/A Which drug do you consider to be your favorite (including alcohol)? Well, I don't even like the taste of alcohol... but I guess that has to be the answer as it's the only one I'll ever indulge in. Who have you had sex with in order from best to worst (you can use initials if you want)? Only done it with one person. What’s your favorite kind of alcoholic beverage? Margaritas. Do you feel like different alcohols have different effects on you? No. Honestly, how good do you think you are in bed? What about oral? Eh, I'm shy, but I don't think I'm bad. It was good enough to get the job done, at least. I fucking hated oral so therefore rarely did it, so idk. What’s your biggest thing you want to accomplish? Overcoming my hard-as-diamonds anxiety. Three favorite candies. Go. Reese's. Sour Punch Straws. Peach rings. What was the last stupid thing someone talked you into believing? Idk. What’s a song that would describe your life at the moment? I legit feel "In The End" by Linkin Park pretty deeply of the late. Man, somehow been a year and still R.I.P. Chester. ;_; What was the last thing that you shared? Idk. Do you ever eat leftover pizza cold? I love cold pizza. Where are you the most ticklish? FEET. When you’re wanting a midnight snack, what do you normally get? I don't have them. Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? Maybe Vulpix. Small and cute and isn't like, actually on fire. Have you ever considered a career in music/acting? No. When was the last time you felt seriously embarrassed? At a VR class when I was talking and completely lost my train of thought and caused like five awkward silences. If your bedroom walls could talk, what would they most likely say? "Bitch u ever move?" Did you ever really believe in Santa Claus? Yes. Have you ever seen a movie that was better than the book it was based on? Maybe? I'm unsure, but I doubt it. Did you like the show Invader Zim? I never really watched it. What’s the greatest/most influential song you’ve ever heard? Ozzy's "Life Won't Wait." Have you ever bought yourself a present at Christmas? I mean, I've been given money to buy something myself. Is there someone that you’re mean to for no good reason? No? I have damn good reason to be unfriendly to Bentley, but not mean. What was the last thing you got out of the freezer? A rat for Venus. How many people signed you latest yearbook? Not too many, but I didn't ask a lot to. How is your mom today? Probably the same as always: Tired and stressed. Do you prefer long or short hair on the opposite sex? Generally, longer hair. But of course it varies on the person. Would you swap your first name for your middle? No, that would sound so weird. Plus I like my name. Would you rather have 10 siblings or be an only? Hm... growing up as an only child would suck, I think. Ten is a hell of a lot, but I'd prefer that over none. What is your favorite soda? Mountain Dew Voltage is my Achilles' heel. Do like country music? No. It's seldom I'll like any. Tim McGraw impresses me most of the time, though, but not to where I'll go look up a song and binge it. Are you afraid of black cats? Not at all. Do you watch the lightning during storms? No, I stay inside. If I'm in a car though, I keep an eye out. Do you like Scentsy stuff? Sure, but I don't buy anything from it. Do you like House? Never seen it. How many tracks were on the last album you listened to? Idr. Which one of your relatives is most likely to embarrass you? Probably Dad. The way he interacts with some people is kinda... weird to where people may feel like he's being rude, when he in no way intends it. You can tell some people don't get him. Are there any songs in your iTunes library that you’ve never listened to? No. Who is the most intelligent person you know? My psychiatrist probably qualifies as a genius. Who was the last female you were introduced to? My personal VR coach. Who was the last male you were introduced to? I have no idea. Who is that last person who harassed and annoyed you? I feel like it was some kid that annoyed me, but idr. Who is the last person who made you feel hurt? Probably Mom. What was the last thing you were worried about? My job future. Are you worried about anyone now? Not really. What time of day feels the most magical to you? Early morning, especially when it's dewy with a light mist and a pink sky as the sun starts to rise... whew. Love it. Who are you jealous of? My sisters and an old friend that's a professional photographer now. What is the last physical ailment you took medication for? Nausea. If you are a YouTuber, are you behind on posting videos? N/A Who is a great YouTuber you have recently discovered? Not really anyone recently. What color is your bathrobe? I don't have one. What is a great pain reliever? Depends on the pain? Are you interested in a guy who has a girlfriend? No. Do you sell any products? If so, what do you sell? No. Are you responsible with money? I believe so, having learned to be very frugal from growing up poor. My weakness is tats, though... I have to make a genuine effort to save for other things. Are you responsible in general? Not very, honestly... but it also depends on what I have responsibility over. Do you use a nightlight? No. Kaiju's and Venus' lights stay on, however, if you wanna count that. Do you have a girl that is strictly a friend that isn’t related to you that you can go to? Not really. Are you “the good guy”, or “the bad guy”, or somewhere in between? I guess the good guy? Have you ever watched the original British Skins? No, nor the American. It disgusted me. Do you like Oreos? Hell yeah. Have you ever had a sex dream about someone you barely know? I don't believe so. Were you a cute baby? I was, dude. Would you ever shoot someone right in the face? If it was in self-defense with someone trying to seriously hurt or kill me, that's right where I'd aim. Have you ever sold drugs? No. Have you ever been shot? No. Are you on good terms with your parents? Yeah. What’s your opinion on border control? It's necessary for the protection of our country. I'm totally for legal immigration, mind you. Have you had any major tragedies in your life? I'd say one event qualifies. What do you think of open casket funerals? No opinion, I think... A part of me feels like the risk of someone disrespecting the body isn't worth it, but simultaneously I firmly feel the actual family and those very close to this person have the right to see them one final time looking at peace. Have you ever had a pet rat? Quite a number. I had two pairs where three died of unknown causes, while one developed cancer and passed. Went through two that died last year; one had to be sick upon adopting her, as she passed very quickly, and her sister immediately followed suit. Adopted Mitsu, later another to try to give her a partner (rats are social and aren't supposed to live alone), but she'd already grown territorial, so the sweetheart had to be returned. Now I just have Mitsu. Could you go a year without sex? It's already been three, and longer wouldn't matter to me. Have you ever wore pajamas a whole straight week? I'm just about always at home in my pj's, and considering I leave like, never... but not the same pair that long. Have you ever waxed your legs? No. Have you ever taught a little kid to flick people off? The fuck, no. Are you more of a taker or giver? Giver. Have you ever itched yourself until your skin was raw? I have permanent scars on both shins from that; my skin becomes unbearably itchy after I shave and then scrub my legs in the shower. Nothing seems to stop it. Do you always clear your history after using the computer? No. Have you ever been chased by a cat? Playing with kittens/juveniles, probably, considering just how many we've had throughout my life. Have you ever had your food stolen by a bird? No. Have you ever dyed your hair light auburn? No. Do you take really good care of your feet? Run now w/ potential TMI: My feet are like. Nothing but thicc calluses from when I would walk like crazy. I haven't been able to get rid of them for nothing, and it's been YEARS. Like, I probably need a professional for this shit lmao. My nails are fine and I keep them clean, it's just the callus ordeal. Is the snow where you live the icey kind or powdery kind? It can be either. Do you get blizzards where you live? I think we've only had one that qualified in my entire life. Can't remember if the wind was bad... What’s the coldest you can remember it ever being? With the wind chill, it was actually around 2 degrees, I think. When was the last time you did something rebellious? Um. Idk. What are your favorite things to create? OCs. What’s an old hobby that you want to pick back up? Reading. :/ Do you ever read books to a pet? No. Which has better craft supplies: Dollar Tree or Dollar General? I have zero clue. Which dollar store do you shop at the most? I think Dollar General? What color is your trash can in your bedroom? I don't have one in here. What was the theme of your childhood bedroom? Baby animals. What color was your nursery as a baby? Idr. What was the last surgery you had? A cyst removal. What’s something you prefer to keep private? Lol yeah, ask that on a survey I'mma share with the Internet. What is something cheesy your high school’s principal has said? Idr. I don't remember much of him other than he was a goddamn ass. Are you more of a rule breaker or rule follower? Depends, but typically, a follower. Are you good at prioritizing? Idk. Which holiday is your favorite to decorate for? HALLOFUCKINWEEN If you’re not religious, were you ever? What made you lose faith? I was raised religious, but just life in general brought me to just theism, which I don't really consider a "real" religion. Is there a particular tradition that you follow from your heritage? No. What are your thoughts on where feminism is today? Yo calm your tits. How would you describe your aesthetic? Likes pastel and soft things but is also gore-crazed and obsessed with dark shit that'll probably lead me to Hell. Are you at all interested in philosophy/theory? If so, what philosopher/theorist caught your attention? If not, would you ever consider reading any? YES; however, as someone with OCD that heavily manifests itself as incredulous ruminations to the point I face breakdowns, I try to avoid philosophical debates. No one in specific has caught my attention, but I mean, I haven't exactly made an effort to learn about anyone. Have you ever played any virtual reality games? What was that like? If not, would you ever like to try? No, but I would LOVE to. Is there anything about technology that scares you? The potential it has to reaching some form of sentience the more and more we advance with it. I ain't about that singularity shit. What’s a song that you know that does a lot of wordplay or anything that you find clever? Shit dude, lots of Otep songs. She can make rhymes and such with the creepiest shit. Bring me back the Otep whose music wasn't just political ranting, please. What do you do before you go to bed? The last thing I usually do is DragonVale. Where did you last go out to eat? Hardee's. Do you have unlimited texting? Yeah. Who of the opposite sex has seen you at your worst? Jason or Girt. Girt came to the ER after my suicide attempt, my lowest of low points, while Jason saw me in absolute hysterics the night of the break-up when I said something suicidal so he came here briefly. I feel each was like... a different kind of "worst," if that makes sense. One was absolute, utter defeat, while the other was seeing a human absolutely shatter. Have you ever won anything from the radio? No. Will you keep your last name when you get married? No. What song are you listening to? Shane Dawson's "Fuck Up" is a Big Mood. Do you know anyone whose name starts with an X? Not that I know personally, I think. When was the last time you took a picture with your pet(s)? Roman like over a month ago, Venus a while before... I rarely take pictures including me because I'm ugly. Who’s your favorite Muppet? I don't know like, any. What’s your favorite monster? (can be Monsters Inc., horror films, stories, or myths, whatever) These are too many options man. I guess probably Pyramid Head. But I'm crazy for cryptids too man, I love me some Jersey Devil and Mothman shit. Have you ever seen a polar bear in person? At zoos. What’s your favorite thing to order from Taco Bell? If you heard me eating cinnabon delights in the next room, you'd have all reason to believe a porno was being filmed. What do you think of off-brand soda? I'm fine with them. Which do you like better – carpet or wood floor? I generally find wood prettier, but carpet is comfier. Getting down on and up off the wooden floor when exercising hurts, though. Buuut wood is also easier to clean... but also louder... why the fuck am I getting this deep into a question jeez idk basically. What embarrasses you the most in front of other people? Being a 23 y/o teenage fangirl lmao. Have you considered running for president? Hell no. If you had to choose one thing you were most passionate about, what would it be and why? Hm... there's a lot. I suppose ending poverty? Or environmental preservation, which I am already extremely passionate about, but I could actually take more action. Where is the most beautiful place on earth and why? I'd imagine the Grand Canyon. It's so vast and ancient and gives you an idea of just how small we truly are. Are ghosts real? Yes. Are aliens real? Probably. Do you know how to play dominoes? No. What food will you absolutely not, under any circumstances, eat? Anything from an endangered animal. Would you ever adopt a child? If I wanted kids, possibly. What is one thing you’re embarrassed to admit you want to try? *shrugs* Is there something you wish you had said sorry for but never did? I wish I'd told Jenna about the Joel thing. Have you been on your first date? If so, how did it go? Yeah, it was fine. Cute really, though unorthodox as he invited my mother along. It actually did make me less nervous tho. What woke you up this morning? My cat meowing his damn brains out. He does this loud, deep meow when he really wants something, and it woke me up. He does that some mornings, and I have no clue why. Your mood? Eh, nervous. I have a short VR class today, and I have to talk to the woman who handles my case, and I don't believe she'll be happy I haven't applied anywhere yet, even though it's been like, five days... I've been working on getting an Office certificate instead. Did you ever watch The Land Before Time when you were younger? I WAS IN LOVE. Do you check your texts right away when you receive them? Usually. What feeling do you have the most difficulty in expressing? Envy. How do you think you would handle yourself in a crisis situation? Have an absolute panic attack and die lmao. But it also depends on if anyone is in the situation with me. Like if someone I seriously loved was endangered, I have a feeling I'd rush to immediately help them. Does any particular season make you happier than others? Why/why not? Autumn. Beautiful and cool. In what circumstances do you feel most at peace? When I'm with Sara and we're both happy and laughing. :') What is the best thing about being a male/female? Female: It's more "socially acceptable" to show emotions. Male: Don't have to worry about menstruation cycles. Do you enjoy hugging people? Do you enjoy receiving hugs? Yeah. Do you think that luck has much to play in your life? No. I don't believe people have premeditated-by-nature good or bad luck. It's all random or related to your own choices. Do you think you are competitive? Do you really dislike losing? In only a few areas; no. What is a talent you wish you possessed? The ability to draw hyperrealistically. When was the last time you went to McDonald’s? It's been quite a while. Maybe around a month. Could you go a whole day without your computer? Definitely not willingly. Have you ever really liked someone to begin with, then changed your mind about them? Yeah, Juan. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone, for more than half an hour? What did you talk about? Most likely Colleen. It was a personal matter, so not saying. Has your ex fallen in love with anyone else, since the two of you broke up? I'm assuming Jason did with Ashley, maybe not. When was the last time you looked at your significant other/crush’s Facebook profile? Been a while. What was the last thing that one of your parents bought for you? Food for me. The last time you went to the hairdressers, what did you have done? A muuuch-needed trim.

[hamilton-one-shots]

160: “ Do you think you can teach me that? ” Philip and John Requested by: A random number generator and my imagination

It looked illegal, so, naturally, Philip’s first instinct was to get a closer look. He moved towards the curly haired stranger and watched as he spray painted the side of the building. He stayed quiet for maybe a minute before his curiosity got the best of him.

“Can’t you get arrested for that?”

The stranger turned quickly only to relax the second that he saw that it was just a kid. “Oh, hey. Why are you sneaking around like that?”

Philip shrugged. “I saw you painting and I wanted to see what was up.”

“Fair enough. And, for your information, this is perfectly legal. I’m getting paid by the owner to make this. It’s kind of like an ad for the store.”

Well, now painting all of those animals on the side of a pet shop made a lot more sense. “Then why’d you freak out so badly when you heard me?��

He sighed. “You know how it is... A guy that looks like me spray painting the side of the building?.. I have a family...”

Philip frowned. He knew that the other had a fair point and it sucked. “Well... Alright. Do you mind if I stick around? I just got off of my shift at Starbucks and my pops won’t be here for a bit. It’s better than wandering around.”

“Yeah, of course. Just keep your distance and watch the fumes. Here.” The man kneeled down and grabbed a bandana from his bag, offering it to Philip. “Breathe through that.”

Philip raised an eyebrow at the other and took a step back. “I’m not stupid. No.”

John looked at him curiously for a minute before it clicked in his mind. “Oh, no, it’s for the paint fumes. Look.” He put the bandana to his face and took a deep breath, then looked back at the younger boy. “See?”

“Right.. Sorry.” Philip took the bandana and held it over his face as the other got back to painting.

“The name’s John Laurens, by the way.” He told him as he started painting another little animal.

“John... Laurens?.. As in son of the senator, Henry Laurens?”

John tutted. “Yeah, the ‘Laurens’ Curse’. I’m not anything like him. He kicked me out the second he found out I didn’t fit into his perfect family portrait.”

Philip’s eyes went wide. “So.. Do you do this for a living?”

John stopped painting and shook his head with a small laugh. “No, I’m sorry. I realize it might’ve sounded that was.” He chuckled and got back to painting. “No, I moved in with a friend during high school and did this for some extra cash, then I went to college. I’m an art teacher at the high school not too far from here and I do this on the side.”

“Really?..” Philip looked up at the painting. Every last detail was almost perfect and he wasn’t even done yet. It looked like all of the animals were going to jump off of the wall any minute.. And this was only his side gig? “You could definitely do this at a way bigger scale for a living. You’re really good.”

John chuckled. “Thanks, I get that a lot.”

“If you know it, then what are you doing being an art teacher? Don’t you ever get tired of dealing with kids who just want an easy A?”

“Well... Yeah, but it’s a lot more than that and it’s definitely more than the pay. When I was a kid, I always drew and paint to relieve stress or just to feel and be happy, but my school didn’t have an art program. This is literally all I had growing up to support me. So I’m trying to give that to other kids, a release and a support system that I never had.”

Philip nodded in understanding. “Where did you say you taught?..”

“King High.”

He smiled widely. “I’m so taking your class this year.”

John couldn’t help but smile from behind his bandana. “Thanks, that really means a lot.”

“Yeah, of course. You seem like a really cool teacher. I’m more of a writer, but this is awesome.” And it didn’t hurt that the guy was pretty attractive, not that Philip would ever admit it out loud.

“Thanks. Why don’t you give it a try?” He smiled and gave him his spray can.

“Wait.. Me? Try to paint something like /that/?” He pointed at himself, then at the wall, wondering if John had lost his mind.

“Yeah. Just give it a try. I can always paint over it if I have to.”

Philip nodded slowly, then turned to the painting. The can he was given was brown, so he tried painting the shape of a dog. It didn’t come out half bad, but the cartoonish style was nothing like John’s more realistic one.

“Hey, that looks pretty good.”

“It looks nothing like yours...”

“Well, that’s the thing about art. There’s no right or wrong way. Your way just isn’t my way and there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re a pretty good artist for someone who’s never picked up a spray can.”

Philip nodded slowly, then picked up a can of black paint to continue, the nose on his dog coming out way too blotchy. “See? I just ruined it...”

John shook his head. “No, spray cans are harder to work with. We can fix it.”

“We?..” Philip was tempted to put down the can and walk away, but something just wouldn’t let him. “Do you think you can teach me that?” he asked, nodding towards the rest of the detailed work.

John nodded without a doubt in his mind. “Of course. If you can, you should come back and we can keep doing this.”

“I would love that.” Philip smiled, before being distracted by someone grabbing him and pulling him away from the wall.

“Philip, what are you doing?”

He shrugged the hands from his shoulders and waved it off, trying to ease his father’s nerves. “Chill, pops. It’s legit, I promise.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry. It’s an ad for the store. You can ask the shop owner. If you want.”

Philip’s father nodded and looked at the can in his son’s hand. “And this?”

“He was just teaching me. I asked. He’s an art teacher and really cool.”

John nodded and pulled out his badge from his jacket. “Yeah, I work at King High. Sorry for worrying you like that.”

“Right.. It’s alright. Come on, Pip. It’s time to go home.” He definitely seemed more relaxed, but Philip highly doubted he actually trusted John too much. So, he just followed him without a word, waving to John as they left. Even if his art had been illegal, Philip new that he definitely made a new friend.

[dancing-the-hellfire-rumba]

Maple April

 Warnings: Unbeta’d, unedted, unediteed, unedtd, oonedted, Your life is awesome as long as you’re happy with it, okay? Okay, Ily <333

Pairing: Jensen x Reader Word Count: 1.8k A/N: Requested by anon! Hope you like it, hon :D I enjoyed writing this a lot, okay? I don’t even know. I’d love your honest opinion on it, hope you can excuse some rushed mistakes and all (point them out if you find them, would ya?) and I genuinely hope you enjoy!

This sucked.

Honestly, you were blatantly lying to yourself while coming here. Deep down you knew it was going to suck, you knew you’d regret coming, you knew you’d end up wanting to get shitfaced more than you’d want to stay sober, yet you still came. You still pressed “Going” instead of “Interested” in the stupid Facebook page your old classmates had created and you still put an effort into your outfit, thinking that maybe, just maybe, time would make them grow out of their trashy attitude.

Surprise, surprise. That wasn’t the case.

The millisecond your foot passed the doorframe, you regretted your life choices.

“Oh my gosh, April is here!”

“It’s Y/n, Shannon” You smiled awkwardly at the leggy blonde that somehow had grown even hotter than her senior-year self. The world was unfair, you’d decided. Her C cup boobs almost burst through the seams of her shirt, waist tinier than a stick and ass bigger than the damn seat. Lord knows how many drinks she had been offered in the past ten years.

“No it’s not!” Shannon scoffed and shook her head in disbelief. “Guys! April is here!”She called again, seeing as no one responded the first time. Sigh.

She pulled you forcefully by the elbow, causing you to stumble a little but everyone seemed to be confused for a second as to who you are. That was until a guy -was it Jack or Jason? - yelled “OH! Maple April!”

“That never even made sense, Justin” Said Clairie, the only normal and actually friendly girl your old class had to offer. She had grown a little taller, a black pixie cut with blue tuffs adorning her head instead of her waist-long raven hair.

“Holy shit, Clairie, you look great!” She gave you a hug, still shorter than you, and nodded her thanks.

“You do too, Y/n” At her appearance you felt a little more optimistic about this night but it was all shattered when she declared she had to run because, wait for it, her younger kid, as in she has multiple,  was messing with the babysitter and his brother.

Clairie. Kids. Wow.

Try telling her past self she’d end up married with kids. The Clairie you knew would punch you in the face.

You thought of your own love life and quickly pushed the thought away, realizing it was almost non-existent.

“So, Maple April,” for fuck’s sake, Justin “what have you accomplished in the past ten years?” Somewhere between yelling and gaining the attention of many bystanders that had only come to enjoy a drink in peace, they had thrust a glass of Johnnie on the rocks in your hands and started asking questions. Many had boyfriends, girlfriends, fiancés or husbands and wives. Others had kids or a successful career, others had published novels or traveled, or all at the same time, and here you were.

“Well… I opened this small little coffee shop in my neighborhood. It’s going pretty well; I bake my own pies and all. It’s great, I love working there.” You grinned. You had wanted to open a cozy, tumblr-like coffee shop since you were a teenager and you were so proud of yourself that you had done it finally, and your facial expression showed as much.

“What, that’s it?” Justin asked with a raised eyebrow. “That’s all you’ve done in ten years? Open a coffee shop?” And then he started laughing. The rest of the group followed along, some doubled over, others looking at their significant others in that ‘pff- she-can’t-be-serious-can-she’ face.

“No husband? A boyfriend, even?” another girl, Margaret, asked in disbelief.

“Well-“

“Hey, sweetheart.” An unfamiliar arm wrapped around your waist and the smell of musk, clean clothes and rain clouded your senses. “I’m so sorry but I couldn’t find a spot to park, the parking lot outside was filled to the brim. I hope I’m not too late.” Your eyes dragged up the muscular, plaid-clad chest, meeting two brilliant green irises.

You did not know this man but, dear lord, he was gorgeous.

It was about time someone asked what the hell is this oddly familiar looking stranger doing right now?

His eyes were almost pleading but something told you he wasn’t pleading for forgiveness, like he was pretending to. He was mentally pleading for you to play along.

A whirlwind of emotions ran through your mind in less than a second when you confusedly concluded, ‘Hey, why the hell not?”

“Uh-I, uhm, su-sure, it’s- it’s fine” You cleared your throat “You’re not?” You furrowed your eyebrows for a second, hearing your statement come out as a question, and gave him a tight-lipped smile, the brightest blush in existence covering your cheeks.

“So? Won’t you introduce me?” He asked, laughing lightly and nudged you subtly. His shoulders slackened a little, seeing you play along.

“Uh r-right.” You turned to your old class, meeting seventeen, absolutely flabbergasted, faces. “Guys, this is my b-boyfriend? Uh-“

“Jensen” He nodded and smiled brightly at everyone. Shannon’s jaw was almost agape.

“Mapl-“She cleared her throat “April, you didn’t tell us you had a boyfriend!” She gushed. “And a famous actor, none the less!”

“But I did tell you my name is Y/n, not April” You muttered, partly for the sake of sarcasm and partly to inform the man beside you that your name was not April. Jensen’s eyes glinted at your comment in amusement. He tightened his hold on your waist lightly.

Wait, wait, wait, hang on. A famous actor?

You peeked at Jensen curiously, trying to remember if you’d seen him before.

Your eyes traced his face, beginning from his fluffy hair that was trimmed at the sides, to his crinkled forehead, perfectly constructed eyebrows –where they plucked? They had to be, no one has such perfect eyebrows naturally-,  ridiculously colored, forest green eyes that reflected the bar’s lights beautifully, a nose that was almost as straight as a ruler but also the tiniest bit crooked, indicating he had had his fair share of fist-fights in his life, plump lips that looked really kissable and to his jawline, one that was so sharp it could cut a damn steak, you were sure of it. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed and like a flash, your mind cooperated and sudden realization dawned on you.

Holy fucking shit.

Jensen Friggin’ Ackles, celebrity, declared hottest man of the damn year from a famous magazine, has his arm around you and is pretending to be your boyfriend.

Uhm, wHAT?!

“Hey” Jensen waved at everyone. Shannon moved quickly towards him, laying a hand on his arm and blinking repeatedly. Justin leaned and whispered something in one of his old friend’s ears, eyes still trained to the man who, for some reason, decided to play pretend in your favor and somewhat rescue you from this situation.

You were confused, to say the least.

“So, Jense, you-“

“Only Y/n gets to call me that”

“Who’s Y/n?” Shannon knitted her eyebrows.

“Uh, my girlfriend?”

“No, no, her name is April” Justin insisted.

Jensen huffed “I think I would know my girlfriend’s name, man” Justin quirked an eyebrow. Jensen looked at me expectantly.

“But… Maple April? Where did that come from?”

“You’ve been calling my girl by the wrong name for the last fourteen years?!” Silence.

Your ‘boyfriend’ looked legit pissed. Well, he was a great actor and all but his eyes glinted with fury, arm protectively tightening around you and the vein on his neck popped up. You could see a fight erupting in a matter of seconds, which both confused you because you don’t know this person that has their arm around you, and warmed your heart a little because even if he was a stranger he cared for you in a way no acquaintance or friend ever has.

You worked on instinct, placing your hand on his chest with gentle pressure and feeling tiny bolts of electricity run up your arm at the touch. Jensen’s eyes turned to your petite frame and saw your pleading expression to please don’t start this, it’s not worth it, and something inside him cracked.

He too was dumbfounded by what great big bags of dicks you had involved yourself with. They had known her supposedly through the entirety of high school and yet they didn’t even know her frigging name! If that wasn’t all kinds of wrong he didn’t know what was. A voice in him told him it was weird to react with such intensity, he didn’t know you, he just saw you suffering from afar and decided to step in. He decided to ignore that voice. He kissed your forehead and muttered “Come on, baby, let’s go,” his arm moving from your waist to your shoulder, pulling you outside.

Only when the chilly air slapped you in the face did you realize what just happened. He dropped his arm from your shoulder and shoved his hands in his pockets.

October had just rolled and both of you regretted not having worn at least a jacket of sorts. You shuffled closer to him, discovering that his arm and torso produced warmth that both of you could use at the moment. You stopped walking next to a random car, looking at the stars. You watched your breath become a small cloud in the air and breathed out a little harder to see it form, letting yourself feel the goosebumps that appeared up your arms and legs. The silence let your mind register what the hell had just happened in such a short amount of time.

“Thank you” You decided to speak up, eventually. “I don’t know why you decided to do it, or why you even bothered, but thank you nonetheless.” Jensen smiled gently.

“It was nothing, really” He looked down at you skeptically before pulling his fist from his jean pocket and motioning towards you. “May I? You look… kinda cold” You quickly slid under his wing.

“Hmph, don’t blame this on me, Mister, you are as cold as I am” Jensen smiled and nodded, licking his lips.

“So, coffee shop, huh?” He asked, genuinely interested. He had heard that?

“Yeah, coffee shop.” You bit your lip, battling with yourself for a second. “Would you like to see it?”

“You flirting with me, Maple April?” Jensen teased you, a cocky smirk forming on his face.

“Last time I checked you are the one having your arm around me” You bit back, chuckling.

“Fair enough.” He stated.

“So? What will it be?” Oh God you’d be pretty fucking embarrassed if he said no right now.

“I’d love to”. Both of your smiles were stretched from ear to ear and a small feeling of accomplishment swelled up your chest. You led him to your car and to your beloved coffee shop, ending up having one of the best nights of your life.

@deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester

@deanssweetheart23

@easelweasel

@nostalgic-uncertainty

@twentyoneredsocks

@dancerwithapen

@mogaruke

@superseejay721517

@blackcherrywhiskey

@super-nerd-atural

@andi-winchester

[closetofanxiety]

Show Review: Survivor Series 2017

I missed the first three of 30 matches, because I was out having dinner with friends, having watched a Chikara show in the afternoon. Let’s try to salvage something from the wreckage anyway, starting with the first match I saw:

The Shield vs. The New Day

I hadn’t been watching the TV leading up to this, so I was a little unsure about the storylines going into it. I guess the overarching storyline here is “red vs. blue,” though, right? The Shield are Team Red, The New Day Team Blue. Both are popular, babyface trios, so that’s a bit of an odd way to start. This had the feel of an indie show in that regard; more about putting together “dream matches” than convincing storylines. Lot of fast, fluid action in this, as you’d imagine: Big E in particular looked terrific doing one of his nutso dives to the outside. I used to want a New Day breakup so Big E could have a monster singles push, but I like these guys as a team too much. Good back and forth, but the Shield wins it with a triple powerbomb on Kofi. 

Rating: Three Survivors.

Team Raw (Alicia Fox, Asuka, Sasha Banks, Bayley, Nia Jax) vs. Team Smackdown (Becky Lynch, Natalya, Naomi, Carmella, Tamina)

Becky Lynch is the only member of Team Smackdown who has a surname, which I assume is why she’s captain. Meanwhile, Alicia Fox is captain of Team Raw because she has the world’s greatest hat. Words can’t do it justice. It’s a triumph of the human imagination. You know Foxy’s been on the main roster since 2008? She does not seem to age.

Team Raw are the heavy favorites here, and get off to a hot start by eliminating Becky quickly. That is ... an interesting predicament for Team Smackdown, which is now down to two OK-to-decent wrestlers (Naomi and Natalya), one green as heck wrestler (Carmella), and Tamina. Also, with the elimination of Becky Lynch, they have lost 100 percent of their surnames. How will Team Smackdown rent a car or check into a hotel now?

Next elimination is Bayley, eliminated by Tamina. We get the Big Lasses matchup we’ve been waiting for, with Tamina and Nia Jax squaring off. Nia looks like Lou Thesz compared to Tamina, who does manage to hit a trio of nasty looking superkicks. It’s a superkick party, if you will. Nia is counted out and eliminated. Mild upset!

Foxy goes out next, pinned by Naomi in a fall that was either mishandled by the ref and timekeeper or miscommunicated by the commentary team. It was confusing, and seconds later Sasha locked in the Banks Statement, forcing Naomi to tap. 

Asuka finally gets tagged in and the crowd goes berserk. She kicks nine bells of shit out of poor Carmella, getting an easy pinfall after a roundhouse kick that was either a legit boot to the goddamn face or one of the best working kicks I’ve ever seen. We’re down to Asuka and Sasha Banks vs. Tamina and Natalya.

Natalya forces Sasha to tap to the Sharpshooter, leading to a 2-on-1 sitch. This Asuka, though, so it’s no problem. She submits Tamina with the cross armbreaker, and then hits a nice combo on Nattie, finishing with the Asuka Lock for the submission win. 

Good match, lot of fun moments, and they really built Asuka up as an ass kicker here, which they singularly failed to do in her main roster debut.

Rating: Four Survivors

Baron Corbin vs. The Miz w/The Miztourage

Corbin, the US champ, is from Team Blue, while Miz, the Intercontinental champ, is from Team Red. The belts aren’t on the line tonight, though. I have not been following this feud at all. It’s heel vs. heel, which is again kind of an indie style move. Maryse is at ringside, and Big Banter keeps jawjacking at her. At one point, he blows her a kiss, plants Miz’s face into the announce table, and then turns back to Maryse: “That’s a what a real man does!” FUCK YES BARON CORBIN. I LOVE THIS SLIMY FUCK. There’s some weirdly old school limb work in this match, Miz gets assists from Bo Dallas and Curtis Axel (resplendent in a bright crimson neck brace), but ultimately it’s not enough. Big Banter is too big, and too bantering. After beating Miz with End of Days, Corbin takes the mic and tells us that he shut all of us up tonight. God bless you, Lone Wolf.

Rating: Two and a half Survivors

The Usos vs. The Bar

The Usos are Smackdown tag champs, the Bar are Raw tag champs. I had high hopes for this match, as the Usos are my current fave tag team, and the Bar are nasty boys who like to go hard. Perhaps because of these expectations, I was a little let down. Don’t get me wrong; this was a fine, gritty matchup between two expert tag teams, but it lacked a little something in the spice department. I like a bit of rooster sauce on my gritty matchups, you know what I mean? Some smoky flavor. Some chipotle. Some reason to care, I guess. At least give me Big Banter talking shit at someone’s good lady wife. 

This match ended with a crescendo of Uso superkicks on poor turkey-haired Sheamus, leading to Byron Saxton pronouncing it “a superkick party,” and dozens of nerds being Mad Online. The match was fine, don’t get me wrong, it just lacked that rooster sauce, that Chettinad delight, that spicy spicy heat.

Rating: Two and a half Survivors. 

Jason Jordan is interviewed backstage. The crowd boos as soon as they see him. Jason Jordan is the new bland babyface hated by all. 

Alexa Bliss vs. Charlotte Flair

OK, this brought the rooster sauce! Charlotte Flair as an earnest babyface is not great, but Alexa Bliss is so good as the conniving heel humiliatrix she instantly gets you rooting for whoever she’s wrestling. Possibly including Jason Jordan.

This was a pretty terrific match. Bliss has proven she can hang in big matches despite her limitations as a wrestler and Charlotte has enough gears to switch up her style depending on the opponent. Good character work here, too, as Bliss gets visibly intimidated and desperate as the match goes on and she can’t manage to put Charlotte away. She tries to hit Twisted Bliss - which, you’ll recall, was originally called the Sparkle Splash - but Charlotte gets her knees up, enabling her to lock in the Figure 8 for the win. A chastened Bliss clutches her title in pitiful humiliation while Charlotte celebrates. I have to say, though, the Figure 8 is a fuckin dumb submission move. It looks laughably easy to break.

Rating: Four Survivors.

AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar

A last minute-ish substitution for the planned Jinder vs. Brock match, and boy, are we ever lucky. Hard to imagine that contest being as sensational as this one. The best match Brock has had in years, and no surprise it was with AJ, who seemingly gets the best out of everyone.

The start of this match was all Bork, though, with the Conqueror Beast Sleeper Repeater tossing AJ around the ring like a ragdoll. This, I think, was important, because the size difference between the two is so unavoidable. You have to at least establish Bork’s initial physical superiority.

From there, though, AJ started chopping down the mighty oak with a series of nasty kicks to the legs, chipping away until he can start using some of his more elaborate offense. This had some really glorious AJ moments, including a springboard 450 splash that looked like a damn Leonardo Da Vinci sketch; “picture-perfect” does not begin to describe the Pythagorean perfection of Styles’ form on that. But, as this is a good story, AJ’s grace is countered by Bork’s brutality, as when the Sleep Eat Beast City Conqueror gets out of the Calf Crusher by grabbing AJ’s entire fuckin head with his fist, and smashing it repeatedly into the canvas.

Bork kicks out of his second Phenomenal Forearm (it is fun to imagine AJ trying to hit the Styles Clash in this match), catches AJ on a springboard from the ropes, and hits the F5 to win. 

Absolutely fantastic match. 

Rating: Four and a half Survivors.

Team Raw (Braun Strowman, Kurt Angle, Triple H, Finn Balor, Samoa Joe) vs. Team Smackdown (Shane McMahon, Randy Orton, Bobby Roode, Shinsuke Nakamura, John Cena)

People complained about this being the Old Man Bowl because of the ages of the various competitors (at 73 years old, Brong is the youngest), but this was, for the first half, a completely fun event with some of the biggest names in wrestling in the entire world over the last 20 years.

The various potential matchups were tantalizing, because of all the histories these men have had with each other, both in WWE and elsewhere; Finn Balor squaring off against Shinsuke Nakamura, Randy Orton against his old Evolution mate Triple H, Angle and Cena in a callback to Cena’s first-ever appearance in WWE. Hell, even seeing Cena and Orton team up together was a blast; it raised all kinds of fun possibilities. Imagine if these guys were a full-time tag team?

Lots of this at first, fun matchups and the crowd going nuts, until two quick eliminations by Brong Strongmonger, who pins both Nakamura and Roode after power slams. That sort of sucked some of the fun out of the room, with Smackdown falling behind, 5-3. Still, one of those three is JOHN CENA, so not to worry.

Cena gets the next elimination, over Samoa Joe by pinfall, and someone on commentary (Graves?) mentions that they both started together in the same company, which is a nice shoutout to the UWF, even if they weren’t mentioned by name. Vince probably has weird rules about that.

Then Cena and Angle are alone in the ring, and it’s fuckin wild, a great reminder of all they’ve done in their careers, two Old Gladiators in the twilight of their runs, facing each other one more time. Angle gets the upper hand and the surprise elimination, leaving just Randall Keith Orton and Shane “O” Mac to take on the four remaining Rawmen.

Orton gets a quick elimination over Balor with the RKO OUTTA NOWHERE, but then Brong Straunchman eliminates Orton with yet another power slam. Power slam, power slam, power slam. The 1980s never ended, folks.

Now it’s Old-Ass Shane McMahon, Shane “Not Really a Wrestler” McMahon, against Angle, Triple Haitch, and Braunt Strontium. Angle, who was humiliated by Shane’s invasion of Raw a few weeks ago, beats the shit out of Vince McMahon’s second-favorite child, putting on the ankle lock for a surefire submission win until ...

Triple H enters the ring and takes Angle out with a Pedigree, dragging Shane on top of the Olympic Hero for the three-count. What is this?? Is Triple H a damn turncoat?? WHAT ABOUT THE OATH YOU SWORE TO UPHOLD THE RAW CONSTITUTION, HUNTER????

No, wait. Turns out Triple H is not a turncoat, he is a Glory Boy. He just wanted to have the big win for himself. He hits the Pedigree on Shane and gets the pinfall. Team Raw win! Smackdown Live is now canceled, and all their wrestlers are unemployed! 

(I should mention that at some point there was a meaningless run-in by Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn, who are the professional Shane dislikers)

What a moment for Team Raw! Triple Ha wants to celebrate with his fellow Raw Boy Brawlawan Strawalawan, but Big Beard Brongstrong has other ideas. He does not like trickery, or Glory Boys. He chokes Triple H, lots of people on the Internet do a “Choke me daddy” gag in response, and then, because he is the man they call Brong Strongman, he hits 300 running power slams on Triple H. EVERYONE GETS A RUNNING POWER SLAM.

Rating: Three Suvivors, I guess? Kind of a muddled finish there, and once again it comes down to the machinations of the extended McMahon family, a group of gross sociopaths I am tired of seeing on television.

[nash-bby118]

Stuck in Hell School: Chapter 1 - Reader Insert

Note: Title is basically saying ‘Stuck in High School.’ 

Note 2: Oh look at that...another Crowley fic that won’t be updated as much as I want it to be. This time it’s a reader insert taking place in a mega AU where the characters are either students or teachers in High School. Oh and it’s ReaderxCrowley too. 

Note 3: Some parts may be inspired by my favorite chick flick ‘Mean Girls’ at some parts of the fic. 

Summary(I suck at summaries): Reader is the new kid in town and at school. During her shadow day with Charlie, she becomes friends with her and her friends and is told the dos and don’ts. Especially when it comes to who to try to befriend and who to ignore and not bother. 

While being told about the ‘Populars’ , she can’t help but notice one guy, Crowley, looking at her and it was at that moment she started falling hard for him. Despite being told how he was a charmer and heartbreaker. And to stay away from him.

Crowley does whatever he can to get your attention, falling for you too but you feel you can’t trust him and that he’s just screwing with your head and heart due to your low self esteem. Meanwhile, queen bee Abaddon loves him too, even though he doesn’t love her back. When she sees the two of you starting to become close, she starts to prepare to make your first year in a new school nothing but Hell. Can you survive the year?

Relationships: Just CrowleyxReader for now. 

Warnings: None other than it’s a long chapter. 

Rating: T for language. 

Enjoy!

Stuck in Hell School Chapter 1 -

Your name was, ‘Y/N.’ You had just moved into a new town with your family and have to attend a new school starting this year, your sophomore year. You absolutely dreaded having to make new friends since your old ones were a few hours away. Not to mention the fact you are very shy, have low self esteem, and have social anxiety too. Plus, you weren’t very popular at your old school so you can already expect what this year will be like.

“C’mon, (Y/N)! Time for your first day of school!” Your mother called.

Groaning, you rolled over to your side and checked your phone.

7:00 A.M.

You wanted to roll back over and sleep for a few more minutes- or hours- but your mom came in and shook you before you even had a chance to fall back asleep.

“Come on. I know you’re nervous, new school and all. But I’m sure you’ll be fine.” Your mom said as you sat up. “Get ready and I’ll make you your favorite breakfast.”

“Okay…” You yawned and stretched.

After your mother left your room, you got up and went into your bathroom where you had placed your clothes last night.

“So not ready for this…” You muttered as you got changed.

Once you were changed, you brushed your hair and teeth and washed your face. Then you put some socks on and grabbed your book bag that was sitting by your bed.

Going downstairs, you put your bag down and sat at the table. It was times like this where you wished you weren’t a only child. Having a older or even younger sibling attending the same school would make you feel more comfortable. Unfortunately, you don’t have one and know no one at your new school.

“I don’t understand why we had to move…” You said, tapping your finger on the table.

“You know your dad’s job requires us to move about.” Your mother replied from the stove.

“Yeah but not hours away.” You said.

“Always a first time for everything.” Your mother shrugged.

You huffed and banged your head on the table, wishing the day was over and done with already.

“Here. Eat up.” Your mother brought a plate of pancakes and bacon over with a cup of chocolate milk.

“Thanks.” You said, lifting your head up, and feeling happy at seeing your favorite breakfast.

You ate quicker than you wished but figured it was just stress that made you eat fast. When you were done, you and your mom hopped in her car so she can drop you off at school.

After arriving, you knew that you had to go to the main office on the second floor to meet with the principal.

“Um excuse me?” You said, walking in.

“Yes?” The secretary asked, looking up.

“Uhh…I’m new here and was told to come here first.” You said and the woman smiled.

“(Your first name, last name)?” She asked and you nodded. “That’s me.” You said.

“Welcome to the school. The person that you’ll be shadowing for the day and will show you around during her study hall will be here soon. Please take a seat until then.” She said and you nodded again.

Doing what she said, you turned and sat down. Feeling sweat dripping down your back already and picking at your finger nails, a bad habit you always do when stressed or nervous.

“Ah this must be our new student.” A male said, coming through from behind the counter. “I’m your principal, Chuck Shurley.”

“Hi I’m, (Your first and last name).” You shook his hand.

“Well, (Y/N), I hope you have a great first day. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to come here and ask.” Chuck said.

“Okay. Thanks.” You said.

“Are the morning announcements ready?” Chuck asked and the secretary nodded. “Good.”

Eventually he left and headed back in his office and after what felt like forever, a girl about your age came running in.

“Oh God I’m so sorry I was almost late!” The girl said, to the secretary. “So is my new friend here yet?”

The Secretary simply pointed behind her to you.

“Hi! I’m Charlie Bradbury!” She introduced herself and you shook her hand and introduced yourself back. “Well, come on. You can put your book bag in my locker until you get yours. Then we got to rush to first period or Mr. Ketch will probably kill me.”

“Um okay.” You said quietly and got up to follow her down the hall.

“Sorry about rushing. Hit all sorts of traffic on the way.” Charlie said. “It’s fine.” You said. “What’s first period?”

“British Literature.” Charlie replied. “Mr. Ketch is a total asshole but at least there are some cute girls in his class.”

“Oh cool….uh…any cute boys?” You asked, not really caring for her preference.

“You’ll have to see for yourself.” Charlie giggled. “Okay I have my books for the next few periods let’s-”

She was cut off by the first bell ringing.

“-get running!” Charlie quickly headed down the hall and to the stairs, you following behind with a notebook and pen.

After running down a floor and zooming through the hallways, you and her finally reached the first period class.

“Almost late again, Miss Bradbury?” Ketch asked, looking up from his desk to see her run in with you following slowly behind.

“Oh come on! I totally have 2 minutes to spare! Besides, I had to stop at the office to get my shadow.” Charlie said, coming behind you and pushing you towards him.

“H-Hi.” You said. “I’m (Your F/N L/N). You’re Mr. Ketch, right?”

“I am. Hopefully you don’t pick up on Miss. Bradbury’s lateness.” Ketch said, shaking your hand.

“Right…” You muttered as he barked at someone to move to another desk, allowing you to sit right behind Charlie.

You quickly went and took your seat and waited for class to start. In the meantime, you either faced forward or looked out the windows that were directly to your left.

Soon the second bell rung and school began. After morning announcements, Ketch made you stand and introduce yourself and say something about yourself. You simply chose to say how you had just moved and that you had a mixed breed dog named ‘Lucky.’

You quickly sat back down and class officially began.

A hour later, you understood why Ketch was considered strict and a asshole. He had practically screamed at half the class for either legit reasons or petty ones.

Especially to some group in the back that you didn’t bother turning around to look at.

“So… see any cute guys?” Charlie asked after class was over and you shook your head.

“I…wasn’t really looking.” You replied.

“Well, we still have six more classes to go. Plus lunchtime too!” Charlie giggled, “Come on, let’s head to second period.”

Throughout the day, Charlie introduced you to all of her teachers and for the most part, you hoped you had them since they all seemed pretty nice.

After 5th period, you two headed back to her locker and grabbed your lunches. Then she showed you to the cafeteria and to the table where a few people that you did recognize from different classes were seated at.

“Hey Charlie!” A boy said. “And, (Y/N), right?” You nodded. “Nice to meet yah! Name’s Garth!”

“Hi.” You said as the rest of the table introduced themselves as Eileen, who you learned was deaf, Gabriel, the class clown, Kevin, the wiz kid, and Castiel, Gabriel’s year younger brother that had poor socialization skills so he liked sticking with him, which Castiel quickly denied.

During lunch, Charlie pointed to the different tables and told you who to watch out for and who is a pretty cool person that you’ll probably get along with. “So that table over there has Lucifer, the average bad boy and Gabriel’s year older brother. Sitting across from him is Balthazar, his best friend and a total ladies man.” Charlie said.

“Best to stay away from them.“ Gabriel informed before Charlie continued.

“At that table alone is Cain. We’ve tried to invite him over but he’s clearly a quiet loner. Which we understand. Hell, you might get along well with him.” She laughed.

“Heh. Maybe.” You said as she continued to point out different students and what they were like and if you should bother making friends with them.

“And finally we have the Popular’s table. There’s a few that are the average jocks like Dean and Benny but they can be pretty cool at times. Dean is especially protective of his younger brother, Sam, who is in Junior High.”

“My cousin, Michael is pretty alright too. Same with this chick, Jo.” Gabriel replied. “However the rest of the girls can be total bitches.”

“Yeah especially the queen bee, Abaddon and her posse, Ruby and Bela.” Garth replied.

“Steer clear of those three in the halls.” Eileen said.

“And if you see them with a guy, don’t ever talk or make eye contact with that guy again. They might think you’re trying to take him away and will make your life a living Hell…” Kevin added.

‘That didn’t sound good.’ You thought to yourself.

As they continued to tell you about them and the dos and don’ts, you couldn’t help but notice another guy sit down at their table. Though you quickly turned around when he and you made eye contact with each other and he smiled in your direction.

“Uh, who is that other guy that just sat down?” You asked, not daring to turn back around.

“Oh that’s Crowley. The last of the popular group.” Cas replied.

“What’s he like?” You found yourself asking.

“To be honest, he can be a real jerk to us guys but I heard he’s a sweet talker to all the girls and flirts with them a lot.” Kevin answered.

“And then proceeds to break their hearts after a date or two. He really likes making girls fall in love with him only to break up with them.” Cas added.

“Wow…” You muttered. “Sounds like a jerk…surprised that the actual jocks aren’t like that.”

“They can be charmers too but they are pretty nice.” Eileen replied.

“Think you’re ready to take on the rest of the year?” Charlie asked.

“I hope so.” You replied, nervously. This was a lot to take in.

“Hey, a funny class is coming up after lunch. Then last period is my study hall so I can show you around during it.” Charlie said, changing the subject.

“What’s next?” You asked.

“Ms. MacLeod’s class. She’s actually Crowley’s mother and is constantly embarrassing him. I know it’s mean to laugh but it can be pretty funny. Especially with how annoyed he gets.” She replied.

“Hehe sounds funny.” You replied and continued on, eating your lunch.

After telling you about the different students and teachers, they started to talk about things that you kept quiet about and just focused on finishing your lunch.

Later on, you had walked into Ms. MacLeod’s class and did the same thing you did in other classes, introducing yourself before taking a seat by Charlie, while the kid that usually sat there had to go back to the only empty seat, which just so happened to be next to Crowley.

Taking a breath, you finally looked around the classroom for the first time today and looked to see who all was there.

A few that you recognized was Castiel, Kevin, Jo, Benny, and Crowley, who you once again made eye contact with. While he looked like he was tormenting the guy next to him.

He winked in your direction and you gave a small surprised gasp as you turned around, feeling he was just screwing with you like the others said he always did. And you being the new kid, made you a perfect target.

For the rest of class you just sat and stared forward at the board but you felt his eyes on you from behind, making you feel nervous. Charlie noticed you tapping your pen on the table you shared, since it was a science class and didn’t have normal desks, and whispered,

“You okay?”

“Yeah.” You whispered back. “First day. Just nerves.”

“Ooh okay.” She said and went back to typing on her computer.

Glancing over, you could tell she wasn’t doing her actual work.

“Oh Fergus~” Rowena said in a sing-song voice. “I know the new girl is pretty but pay attention or I’ll ground you right here and now.”

A lot of kids were chucking at Crowley’s real name while you were busy almost choking on air.

Not only did you not consider yourself pretty. At all. But someone named Fergus was looking at you- oh wait. You suddenly remembered what the others said at lunch about Ms. MacLeod’s son being Crowley.

Though they forgot to tell you that was his real name.

“Did I forget to mention Crowley HATES his birth name?” Charlie asked and you nodded, not wanting to get in trouble for talking.

“Mother, if I told you once, I told you a million times…MY. NAME. IS. CROWLEY!” He put extra emphasis on each word.

“To these lads and lassies maybe but you’ll always be my wee little Fergus.”

The entire room could hear a growl coming from the back of the class as Crowley grew angrier towards his mother.

“Why won’t they let me change this class!?” Crowley questioned.

“It’s simple, son. I make sure you stay here with me.” Rowena chuckled.

“You can’t be serious. That has to be illegal!” Crowley growled.

“Nope. I can do whatever I want when it comes to things like that. Now, back on subject…” She said, going back to the lesson.

As Rowena turned around, Crowley pushed the guy next to him off his chair, making him grunt loudly when he hit the ground.

“And just for that, you are grounded for two weeks.”  Rowena said, not bothering to turn back around. “See, this is why I can’t seat anyone by you.”

“Two weeks!?” Crowley asked.

“Yep.” She looked back. “Care to make it two more?”

Crowley huffed and grabbed the guy’s arm, helping-or more pulling- him up as Rowena grinned and turned back around.

During their little fight, it completely slipped your mind that she said how Crowley was looking at you. That is until Charlie brought it up afterwards and reminded you.

As you and Charlie got up to head to study hall so she could sign in before leaving to show you around the rest of the school, you saw Crowley quickly leaving the classroom, making sure to glance back to you.

“Can’t believe he’s already trying to charm you.” Charlie shook her head. “I-I can’t believe it either.” You replied, nervously.

“Just remember what we told you so you don’t get hurt. Even then, that whole table and I are here for you.” She winked with a smile.

“Thanks Charlie.” You smiled back, feeling you can trust her.

“Don’t mention it.” She said. “He’s not very abusive towards girls just other guys. So I suggest trying to ignore him the best that you can.”

‘That’s gonna be hard when we’re talking about a pretty attractive guy…’ You thought to yourself.

“I’ll try.” You said.

“Have a good day?” She asked and you nodded.

“Yeah…”  You started. “It turned out better than I expected.”

“Great!” Charlie smiled. “Just follow our advice and it should be a good year for yah.”  

“Hm hmm.” You nodded.

After Charlie signed in and showed her paper from the principal that she was allowed to leave to show you around, you guys headed to the third floor and decided to work your way down to the cafeteria in the basement.

You were having a pretty good time walking around and talking about different things and found that you two shared a lot in common. In reality, you truly hoped you had most classes with Charlie or the people that you met at lunch.

Unfortunately, that fun ended with two simple words;

“Hello darlings.” The voice with the very familiar accent said behind the two of you.

“Ignore him.” Charlie whispered and you continued to walk down the hall. “Now come on girls, I don’t like being ignored. Just want to talk is all.” He said and you can hear his footsteps quickly walking towards you.

“Don’t you have anything better to do? Like getting to class for example?” Charlie looked back and asked.

“Touché.” Crowley said. “But I can say the same thing about you. Besides, I always skip last period. Just gym anyways.”

“I have permission to be out of study hall.” Charlie rolled her eyes. “Come on, (Y/N). Let’s go.”

“Ah, that’s right. Your name is, (Y/N). Yah know, I knew the moment I saw you earlier in first period that I wanted to get to know you better.” He said, still following behind you before grabbing your arm and turning you around to face him. “So what do you say, love?”

“Uhhh.” You said, nervous with him being so close. “I…uh… not right now. Okay?” After a few seconds you got your arm out of his grip.

“Seriously, Fergus,” Crowley glared at Charlie. “Go bug someone else. She’s still new and trying to find her way around. Now let us get back to what we were doing in peace. Please?”

“Whatever you say, Charlotte.” Crowley smirked before winking in your direction but you didn’t see it due to looking at the floor, unable to make eye contact with him.

With that, Crowley turned around and walked away. Leaving you with your heart pounding practically out of your chest.

“Charlie…?” You whispered, looking up and watching him down the hall.

“Yeah…?” She asked.

“I-I think we have a problem…” You said.

“What?” Charlie asked.

“I think…I’m in love…” You whispered the last part.

“What?” She asked, unable to hear what you said.

“I said…I think I’m in love…” You said again.

“NO. No way…with HIM!?” Charlie asked and you nodded, confirming.

“I know you said he’s a heartbreaker and a charmer but damn…I can see why now.” You said, your stomach now having butterflies in it.

“(Y/N), PLEASE don’t go out with him.” Charlie said. “I don’t want to see another girl get hurt cause of him.”

“I won’t…I’m sure he’s just screwing with me.” You replied, knowing there was no way such a handsome guy could like you anyways.

“Good.” She said in relief. “Come on, let’s head downstairs to the first floor where the science hallway and gym is at.”

Following her downstairs, you walked into gym and was introduced to the gym and health teacher.

“Hey, you girls didn’t see Crowley right?” Rufus, the teacher, asked.

“Oh yeah he was upstairs the last time we saw him.” Charlie said, selling him out quickly.

Rufus shook his head and clicked his tongue.

“Don’t know what I’m going to do with that boy. His mother isn’t much help either.” Rufus said.

“Yeah. He’s a real troublemaker.” Charlie said.

“And a charmer.” You said without thinking.

Charlie then elbowed you in the stomach, getting you to stop thinking about him momentarily. “So I heard.” Rufus chuckled. “Be careful around him, girls. And make sure she actually listens, Charlie.”

“I will.” Charlie giggled. “Already gave her the whole talk about staying away from him and a few others.”

“Good.” Rufus nodded.

“Anyway, I’m going to finish giving her a tour.” Charlie said, changing the subject.

“Sounds good. Bye girls.” Rufus said.

“Bye!” You said, waving before exiting the gym.

Fortunately, you didn’t see Crowley again for the rest of the tour. So you figured he ditched school and left.

After saying goodbye to Charlie in the main office and confirming you had a pretty good day with the vice principal who just so happened to be Chuck’s sister, Amara, you headed to the front doors where your bus should be waiting for you.

Once on board, checking with the driver first to make sure it was the right bus, you sat down in a empty seat in the middle of the bus and took your phone out, making sure to get everyone’s numbers during lunch.

Mom: Hi honey! How was school? Ready for your official first day tomorrow?

You: It was pretty good! Already made a few new friends.

Mom: See? I told you it wouldn’t be so bad.

You were about to text her back when you heard someone almost above you in the aisle of the bus.

“Ah hem. Anyone sitting there?” You already felt the sweat dripping down your back when you heard his voice.

[pafsins2]

Everything Wrong AND Right With Act Your Age

Here's the one you've all been waiting for. This episode is half of why I started doing Wins, to show a fairer viewpoint compared to my rather salty sins. Speaking of salty sins, let's start.

SINS:

1.This is the final episode in both orders with the normal theme song, and it's used on the most divisive episode of the series.

2.Let's get this out of the way: This is “PHINBELAAAAA!!”: The Episode.

3.Fake out

4.I see they randomly got a budget increase since Tri Stone Area.

5.”We're the co-creators' You can't BOTH be CO creators.

6.If we weren't watching it, we wouldn't have heard you say that.

7.Funny but you did the Perry girlfriend joke in Nerds of a Feather.

8.Do we need this intro when all the other episodes akin to this didn't?

9.The designs suck even though they are exactly as they tend to be like.

10.Only one invention is a sin even the plot is done in a way that has it make sense for there to nly be one small one.

11.They joke about it but the deep voice fits better for an older Baljeet.

12.”Since I've already graduated and been accepted as a professer” Exposition.

13.Buford has an Egorapter haircut.

14.Candace only has this cameo.

15.So with her help, we can send innocent people to jail without evidence? Yay!

16.This reminds me, we never see Jeremy or Stacy. Not seeing them will hopefully not be an issue again.

17.I'll have to kinda of agree with one thing: You could have done the Phinbella side of this story in the present to have a better narrative about them, I guess.

18.Fairly sure I've seen the picking schools conflict in some Disney Sitcoms, making it even more a sin.

19....Irving works for OWCA in the future. Details, now.

20.The others at least tried to change their voices. Jack does not.

21.”I thought he had given up his evil ways when we placed him as a high school science teacher” No, he decided it himself. Yeah, even when they foreshadowing it clear's him changing in the finale was a last minute idea.

22.”He's gone to a better place” He's not actually dead, moving on.

23.Carl dials only 7 numbers,  but  when making a call from the US to The French Polynesia you would have to dial 12 numbers.

24.”Tristate State” Redundancy.

25.”I am so in the friend zone there” Friend Zone.

26.”She changed her eyeballs' Baljeet is good at P&F Sins.

27.”We are guys, we do not talk about feelings” Didn't you want to talk about your feelings back in Hide and Seek?

28.Perry looks exactly the same 10 yeas later and Doof only has different colored hair. They must have aged reaaaly badly between now and Qauntum Bogaloo.

29.Then what is that big contraption?

30.Doof wants to feel the misery of a mid life critis because unlike most people he's not in one. Huh, that's kinda like he wanted to feel the misery of hating Christmas as most people like him do.

31.”Maniup the wha”-That's not at all racist.

32.First boys don't talk about feelings, now the girls are manipulating their men. At least their equal opportunity?

33.Also, THEY SINK BUEET 0/10 WORST EPISODE EVER

34.Some VA's are changed some stay, it's weird.

35.Well, okay now it's REALLY equal opportunity with Baljeet doing it to.

36.Spoilers,nothing comes of this subplot so it's pointless.

37.”We're- girls, it's what we do” Sigh.

38.Perhaps just telling them to do love stuff would be easier

39.Doof isn't forced to pay for the wrecked car.

40.Mishi vanishing makes this bit even more of a sin.

41.Isabella's mom has aged well in 10 years.

42.Cheese romance song

43.The soundtrack version leaves in some dialouge.

44.This is sad and all but maybe you should have just flat out told him before giving up. You know, like you did that one time before the writers- I mean the sprayer thing erased your memory of it.

45.And wait, Isabella gave up and stopped hanging out with them? A little dick-ish to be honest.

46.Phineas sounds roughly fine in most of the episode, but when he sings he's just Vincent Martella.

47.Clip Show.

48.”And now our endless summer is finally coming to an end” Finale-shadowing.

“They would have called us Phinebella” ...+5

53.Teen Isabella is standing on Tween Isabella's foot.

54.They get rid of Candace for this episode, just do the same shitck with Doof getting rid of the stuff.

55.Well, that Doof plot ended abruptly.

56.Just like Isabella's Mom, Linda and Lawrence aged too well.

57.”Watcha doin'?” Boooo.

58.For a Phinbella episode, they don't interact until the very end. And it's slightly rushed, almost like this should have been a special or something.

59.Phineas starts having a thing for Isabella right when she gives up, what cruel irony.

60.Using a Christmas song for the background music.

61. I heard this scene reveals Ferb's full name. Oh man what  is i-”Hey Ferbs” ….............Really.

62.Okay, it's bad enough Montessa went unresolved but they randomly threw it all away just to put her with Ferb thus making all that pointless. I've been joking around but I legit hate this.

63.Vanessa's car only has two seats but when it pulls up next to Isabella it has a third one.

64.They were able to show the lips touching in at2d but not now?

65.Isabella rolls down the window but in the next shot it's rolled up.

66.Abrupt ending to the main episode.

67.”It's just a cartoon' If only both sides of the base on this episode got that.

68.Milly is misspelled as “Millie”

69.Here's a sin for this episode turning most of the fanbase  into dumb idiots. Over a show that had an episode all about how dumb fan wars are.

EPISODE SIN TALLY: 69 (OH COME ON)

SENTENCE:Sick with Salmonella.

...Well, there you go. That's a lot of sins, even for a 22 minute episode. Look, this kind of episode lends itself to sins, okay? Besides, some mock some nitpicking I've seen. But dang, that's more sins than Mission Marvel had. But anyway, hope this side of the base is happy.

Now to please the other side.

WINS:

1.Since this is the last time we see the theme, better point it out as a way.

2.I like the book end with Dan and Swampy, nicely sets things up.

3.”Are we ever going to see Perry the Platypus get a girlfriend?” “No' Nice.

4.You know what? I'm gonna win the concept. Seeing the future with them as teens is cool.

5.Neat invention. Oh hey look there's them building a thing, according to the critics they never do that in this episode.

6.Them being able to be in this many schools makes perfect sense.

7.The fake out with Baljeet's voice is funny

8.Buford as a pretentious film maker is amazing.

9.Candace working in law? Very fitting.

10.The conflict of Phineas having to pick a school is nice.

11.Okay, here's a story: Dan found some nice fan artists and they figured any teens desins they made would just look like hers. So they actually brought her over to do the designs officially, and now she's working on Milo Murphy's Law. Her name is Ashley Simpson and she is a win.

12.I'll defend the future thing to an extent. Some aspects of it add further tension with Isabella going off to school as he realizes this, adding a ticking clock. Plus the deeper romance stuff would have been weird as kids. Could have this still been done in the present? Yes, but I could why the writers thought this was the better move.

13.Irving for OWCA is just awesome. Weirdly fits him too.

14.Carl being the major is nice.

15.It's nice that Monogram is having a good time in retirement.

16.It's interesting how they avoided having Perry interact with the boys, to make it ambitious if they found it by this time.

17.Great lampshading hanging of the eyes in hearts thing.

18.DOOFENSHMIRTZ MMMM  INCORPERATED.

19.I enjoy the Doof plot. First, in concept it's great. Doof actually WANTS a mid life crisi because he actually feels okay. Nice.

20.Also, awesome Doof is awesome.

21.KAZOO SOLO.

22. Baljeet ending up with Ginger is nice evenifbufordwouldhaveeenbetter

23.Fun Fact: Teen Ginger is voiced is voiced by Minga Na. Her voicing Ginger's Mom is fitting enough but she is Michaela Zee's mother in real life.

24.I like the subplot with them trying to get them together. It's pointless but amusing enough.

25.”It is how we love” D'aww.

26.Some funny Doof stuff here.

27.This subplot also gives us the “Doof gets rid of invention” thing which is cool.

28.”We have this sign” Nice.

29.Ginger being jealous of Mishit is amusing.

30.I'll admit it: I really like “What Might Have Been”. Infact, it's the main reason I like the episode. It's very emotional and it sounds really really nice. The emotion is so powerful that you'd have to be a heartless monster not to be sucked in at this point at least due to the effort.

31.This adds a nice tragedy to the whole thing with Isabella having given up and Phineas wondering if he wasted his time on the big ideas. The latter is odd but it's nice in terms of adding tragedy.

32.Leave it these guys to use a fan term in order to rhyme with Samonella.

33.Buford in diaper is a funny visual callback.

34.The Jump instructor pushing Doof is a win.

35.This Lawrence cameo is amazing.

36.Hey, even in the future Paul gets work!

37.”Watcha' doin” Nice.

38.This scene is too nice to dislike.

39.You have no idea how much I love that his full name is just Ferbs

40.Ugh, I guess this a win for Ferbnessa fans. Still not happy about it.

41.If any Phinbella kiss has to be a win, it's gotta be this one. Frankly, I'm glad we got any resolution to them at all. A flawed something is better than nothing.

42.”Well,, that was worth the wait” Agreed.

43.”It's a sweet episode” Yep.

44.Swampy crying is hilarious but weirdly sweet if you know how passionate they were about this.

45.We got hear that nice song in the credits.

46. Swampy still crying is hilarious.

47.One final statement. Yes, this episode is flawed but overall  I think it is good. I'm glad the shippers got their episode, even with all the hyped they caused over it. It's very clear from the behind the scenes stuff that they did put plenty of effort into this and really loved it and  I can't take that away from them. The episode was nice enough but seeing what it means to the creators makes it even nicer. It's a win.

EPISODE WIN TALLY: 47

REWARD: A kiss. (“That was worth the wait”)

Yeah, decent amount. That's more than Clip O Rama and both parts of Where's Perry separately, 2 eps I like more. Weird. I would win most of this stuff no matter what, I mostly was being honest and not just being too nice, hopefully. I do truly like this one fine. If only for what it means to the crew.

Well.....we're almost done. Next one is the finale, than that owca thing. Holy crap. So close. Monday is LDOS but first, some extra stuff. Some wins on the weekend but tomorrow....well, tomorrow is special, you'll see.

Goodbye until then.

[thankguard]

RECAP: OUR TOP 50 AUSTRALIAN HIP-HOP/R&B TRACKS OF 2016

2016 was the year that this scene was finally accepted by mainstream media outlets, played regularly on Triple J and given the opportunity to throw mad rap events at some of the countries’ best live music venues. The number of local rap: artists, releases, managers, parties, radio shows, even blogs exploded too. MANU CROOKS was put on BEATS1 rotation & posted on The FADER. SAMPA THE GREAT racked up over half a million streams on “BLUE BOSS”. BARO blurred cultural/sonic boundaries. TKAY MAIDZA dropped a huge album + landed that KILLER MIKE collab. MIDAS.GOLD, CULT SHOTTA, BIG SKEEZ, I AM D, NICO GHOST & SAVOUR THE RATIONS all dominated live-stages across the country. The GREMLNS, PLAYBACK 808, 1 HUNNID RECORDS & TREXON WAVE showed us the future. These squads are all barely out of high-school, have a strong African heritage and are blowing up against the odds. Almost all of the above was soundtracked by producers: DOPAMINE, MIRACLE, JAMES DAMIAN ANGUS, MITCH GRUANKE & HARVEY who don’t get enough credit. JUNOR launched his AUD$ radio show on SYN which is legit. The PROPHECY BOYZ launched SAUCE - a new brand that will probs do huge things in 2K17. RARE FLOW TV, provided an essential piece-to-the-puzzle, bringing this all to life in quality music videos. Australian rap music is at an all time high. But tbh, it’s going to take another miracle to push it any further. Now that there’s money to be made here, cashed-up copy-cat rappers/labels/magazines/venues with no imagination will find a way to suck the life out of your music for a quick profit. Historically, this has happened many times over, preventing Australians from truly impacting music culture on a global scale. WTF is the diff between us and: Canada, England or America? Terrible artists will succeed if you let them. Donald Trump was elected president. We’re always a stones-throw away from making the next generation of AUS rap fans (and the rest of the world) cringe at us. Question everyone. Even THANK GUARD. Oh, btw. This blog still doesn’t make money. Here’s 50 songs that inspired us to keep hustling in 2016 in between dem long-ass shifts. 50. “VIEWS UP” - NYUON (MELB)

NYUON - an essential character in the MELB rap scene - stretches out the parameters of his sound a little more with each release. “VIEWS UP” saw him lean back towards centre after the experimentally hazy, lilting vibe of his ’15 BYMYSELF tape. With the help of producer ROOKIEPRO he pooled that self-effacing, conscious rap-swagger into his most polished track do-date. 49. “SORROWS” - BLESSED (SYD)

Taking cues from CUDI, UK alternative-pop and their own minds, BLESSED managed to instantly stand out from the rest of the trap-heavy SYD scene last year. Their output in ‘16 was super consistent, and “SORROWS” (our fav) has already amassed over 127K plays on Soundcloud. Early days, but their potential for global appeal is already proven. 48. “I.D.C.A” - 18K (BRIS)

“I.D.C.A” gives you a real wow moment the second those bars come in. 18K’s on that: modern-day BONE,THUGZ & HARMONY/vaguely MIGOS ATL, super-quick flow. His beats are perfect too. Hard hitting, modern trap sounds AND a hint of like CLAMS CASINO cloud-rap as well. 47. “30 DAYS” - DENNIS (MELB)

Mysterious producer/singer DENNIS dropped this one to no reception whatsoever. The mastering isn’t professional, but the song itself and the man’s vocals are world class. You gotta pump the volume ride it to the peak for full-effect fam. Like some new BON IVER shit without the cringe, pretty sure this came out first too. 46. “PRESSURE (ft. JACE XL)” - BILLY DAVIS (MELB)

BILLY DAVIS & JACE XL (RYTHYM SECTION) are both heavily associated with THE OPERATIVES (who monopolised vibes in MELB the last decade). JACE shows off his life-changing soul crooning over some classic BILLY DAVIS instrumentation. This would be a lot higher if it were more relevant to our needs. 45. “NO MORE” - DEEVILLA (SYD)

With this track alone, SYDNEY-based DEEVILLA proved he can write the type of song this scene needs. His flow, lyrics and overall mood on “NO MORE” summed up 2016 perfectly in terms of music & vibe. FLIP TRILL’s production on this one did all the above and more. 44. “RUN UP (ft. FLYBOII & L.U.I)” - LIL SPACELY (SYD)

Got the vibe that BLACK DANNA head honcho SPACELY had a tough 2016. But, being an essential SYDNEY rap-character that he is, the dude still managed to drop some of the livest AUS rap tracks of 2016. On “RUN UP”, he took the chunky, horn-filled instrumental from FAT JOE and REMY MA’s “ALL THE WAY UP”, puffed out his chest, and along with a couple talented homies delivered a growling, arrogant battle track that signalled his readiness to take his music national. He’s already dropped several tracks in ’17. Stay woke. 43. “FIRE” - SQUIDGENINI (MELB)

SQUIDGENINI a.k.a Bella, is one of Melbourne’s better-kept secrets right now. She’s been honing her craft for some time: playing in bands, producing solo tracks and supporting huge artists. “FIRE”, one of her only releases in 2016, instantly put her on our radar. This highly ambitious track features no-bullshit lyrisicm, eccentric production and some straight up vocal-fire. 42. “NAH BRUH, THIS IS WAGE GANG!” - VEENO (SYD)

When BABY VEENO dropped this insane freestyle in October it was criminally over-looked by many (including us). Choosing YOUNG THUG’S timeless “SEE YOU” beat from that G.O.A.T RICH GANG tape proved to us that the man has taste. The ensuing bars instilled visions of VEENO becoming SYDNEY’s trap-SKEPTA in ’17. 41. “CLAP BACK” - SAVOUR THE RATIONS (SYD)

SAVOUR THE RATIONS were one of the most influential, pro-active and entertaining AUSTRALIAN rap crews of 2016 (especially towards the end). KWAME, DOMBA, JAYJAY ASSASSIN, GYBRYLLAH SHYNE & RAJ MAHAL made their biggest moves via videos/live performances. “CLAP BACK” which was dropped on Jan 2nd, 2016 showed the boys doing their ting for their own entertainment. This year they’ll be doing it for thousands no doubt. 40. “BEST FRIEND (YOUNG THUG REMIX)” - BIG SKEEZ (SYD)

This was probably the local track we played most last year. BIG SKEEZ really stood out in ‘16 for his song-writing hustle & originality (highlighted on his S.A.T.T mixtape). Remixing such a familiar, iconic song allowed SKEEZ to let loose in the booth more than ever before, resulting in 3:14 of explosive, feverish trap-fury filled with icy-cold local references/flips. 39. “ALIVE REMIX (ft. BARO & CAZEAUX O.S.L.O)” - ESESE (MELB)

Couldn’t think of a more suitable 2016 MELBOURNE summer-rap anthem than this BARO remix if I tried. It feature local pillars: CAEZEUX O.S.L.O, SKOMES and the ESESE crew - and oozes those heavenly FITZROY day-party vibes. Hearing HENOQ and O.S.L.O both spit new-gen AUS boom-bap masterpieces in rapid succession would’ve brought a tear to the eye of every true BURN-CITY rap-fan this year. 38. “NO MORALS (ft. $KINNY DOM)” - BLACK NAPOLEON (WA)

On “NO MORALS”, BLACK NAPOLEON brought equal parts: slow, deliberate and estatic D double E style booth raps - the kind you’d hear on some UK Pirate radio set to the table. LUCHII, another PERTH-based genius jumped into the mix sounding more like a 6K Gucci, nailing the perfect guest verse. The CAMERON PARK directed-visuals for this one featured no guns, knives or punches thrown, but it still stands as one of the most violent local vids of ’16. #HOMEBAKED. 37. “FUCK THE JUDGE (ft. REMI)” - BARO (MELB)

When BARO dropped the second taste of his soon-TBR JPYNTK tape about 6 months ago, the world was torn in half by the racial violence sweeping the US. It was literally with you everywhere you went, no matter ur skin colour. “FUCK THE JUDGE”, which was released at the very hight of this chaos featured inspired verses from REMI + BARO and was accompanied by the statement: “They're killing my people. They're killing PEOPLE.” The song itself also made another (less important statement) about BARO’s unflinching confidence as a dude/rapper. It was his first absolute crystal clear “fuck u” to industry/fan expectations - a sign that he might be giving the typical AUS rap-sound a much needed kick up-the-butt in 2017. 36. “POTENTIAL (I SEE)” - LORD LEVI (MELB)

When it comes to MELB underground anthems in 2016, LORD LEVI’s “POTENTIAL (I SEE)” is practically unrivalled. The hook, flow and production on this one truly encapsulates the rise of the BURN-CITY outer-suburb high-school trap scene in 2016. LEVI and the GREMLN squad built a dedicated following last year on the back of songs like this. Trek thru any BURN-CITY suburb and “I SEE POTENTIAL” follows u through the streets. 35. “FLEX MODE” - ERIK SANDERS (BRIS)

Brisbane’s ERIK SANDERS blew up out of nowhere last year on the back of several highly-polished, US-influence nu-trap singles. “FLEX MODE” bursts out of the gate with a series of auto-tune inflected bars that twist-and-turn, merging multitudes of impressive melodies in quick succession. This one gets real wild at the end too. 34. “RIDE (ft. REZT)” - LUCHII (WA)

LUCHII has always struck us as an interesting character, but we still slept on the man in ’16. When he dropped “RIDE” like a month ago, we swore to stay woke on the PERTH creative forevermore. This one rides an island trap wave that reminded us of CHILDISH GAMBINO’s “CALIFORNIA” and MAC MILLERS new stuff, but it also hits on something completely new. The vocals reference ATL rhythms/tones AND something else, which MUST have been born in a cloud of green smoke on one of those pristine PERTH beaches. 33. “PULL UP (ft. CIDI, LORD BRAVO, DUT BOL & RANDOLPH)” - BONKI CHOL (ADEL)

In 2016, the TREXON WAVE squad was our guilty pleasure. We legit found ourselves rinsing their proficiently rugged trap cuts more than CHANCE or FRANK. “PULL UP” is the song that started the whole affair. I remember being high af on a Tuesday at like 2PM about 8 months ago just blasting this enchanting MIGOS-style cut on my speakers for an hour straight. Jut listen to BONKI CHOI and homies: CIDI, LORD BRAVO, DUT BOL, RANDOLPH bring the sauce one time. They all flaunt separate styles, personalities and lyrical tendencies on this one, but their skills/delivery are at 100 throughout. 32. “HOW U FEEL” - NICO GHOST (MELB)

Close your eyes and “HOW U FEEL” will take you to a dark, nondescript club setting. Smoke settles in over those eerie trap bells - the calm before the storm. That amazing harpsichord removes any sense of time/location. Your mind is finally empty. Nico spits that FB generation mantra: “I couldn’t really give a fuck how you feel”, lulling you into a false sense of security before ruining your life with intensity. NICO’s 2016 was pretty-much dominated by his wild live-show. But in between sets he found the time to gift us with this the premiere for this one. Was a huge step forward for us. The man’s legit. 31. “MONSTER TRUCK” - ALLDAY (MELB)

ALLDAY is huge - has been for years now. In 2016, he went through a bit of a sonic evolution and we fucked with it heavy. “MONSTER TRUCK” is a song that pushed Australian rap to places in the world it rarely reaches. This one features earnest lyrics, euphoric melodies and a skin-tight flow - years of work/experience all coming together. ALLDAY made some serious global waves last year as unique voice in the world of post-OVO rap music. 30. “LIONA” - NASTY MARS (MELB)

On “LIONA”, future-star NASTY MARS took warm, wavy, lo-fi production ripped straight from a SOULECTION cassette and crafted his own rap/soul-experiment around the peaks and flows of the beat. Although, hardly representative of this guy’s unreleased material, live show and overall position in the AUSTRALIAN rap/soul scene - “LIONA” still managed to take on a life of it’s own… just suss the comments. 29. “BLOOD THICKER THAN WATER” - LUTHER (BRIS)

One of BRISBANE’s most charismatic up-and-comers, LUTHER teamed up with AUS production royalty JAMES DAMIAN ANGUS early last year for a YOUNG THUG/LIL WAYNE style cut that blew us away. The production bangs. LUTHER’s wild, warbling trap-jitterings are fierce, crunchy and at times hilarious. Everything you want in a track like this. The dude is associated with the WORLDWIDE BOYS who will blow up this year. 28. “THIRSTY” - ANFA ROSE (SYD)

“THIRSTY” came last year amidst a never-ending avalanche of consistently jaw-dropping ANFA ROSE & DOPAMINE joint-efforts. Everything on this one from the samples, to ROSE’s perfectly structured verses - to those 808 snares cutting thru your entire being - to the lyrics enforced our theory that these dudes aren’t human. They are computer programs or clones or holograms or something. 27. “MARIA MARIA” - GEEK, CHARLES X & SELASIE WUSSAH (SYD)

This one - easily top 3 most iconic “THANK GUARD” anthems in our entire history. Seeing it live at one of our BONEY parties inspired some of the most emotional dabs ever dabbed. When it dropped back in Jan, it brought out some of our best writing ever too… so I’m just gonna quote myself here.

“On the most polished THANK GUARD Premiere to-date, a dynamic trio of epileptic acid-rappers exchange contrasting melodic flows - in a bid to win a Spanish bae’s heart.” If you don’t know GEEK, CHARLES X (of CULT SHOTTA) or SELASIE WUSSAH by now we don’t trust u. 26. “1 3 1 6” - E L K (ADL)

Adelaide teen E L K bursted onto the scene with last year with “TUTEN KARMEN”, which would have easily made the top 10 if he didn’t remove it from SC. “1 3 1 6”, a different (but equally impressive) joint also blew us away. This one brings guys like MF DOOM & JAY ELECTRONICA to mind instantly, but channeled thru the purity of a fresh, young mind with the voice of a rap-god. In 2016 alone, E L K and his PLAYBACK 808 crew went from bedroom rappers, to the creators of a legit AUS rap movement that looks poised to climb mountains in 2017. 25. “FEELING GOOD FEELING GREAT” - TOYOTOMI HIDEYOSHI (WA)

2 months ago, FourAM head-honcho TOYOTOMI HIDEYOSHI teamed up with producer SNOWEE for a sun-drenched 6K anthem. Some rare RAE SCHREMMURD vibes (if they were slightly more sober). Truly peaks at the end. TOYOTOMI is another young dude whose influence on the culture went beyond rapping last year. From short films, events to supporting those around him - this kid did it all in 2016. 24. “DOPER THAN DOPE (MACHINEDRUM REMIX)” - SK SIMEON (MELB)

One of AUSTRALIA’s best rhythmic-vocalists had a huge 2016. SK SIMEON has been a worldwide reggae force for a minute now. Born in Uganda, recorded his first song at a studio in Dandenong… But last year “DOPE THAN DOPE” - one of his best tracks to-date was remixed by MACHINEDRUM. This version (which sounds good anywhere) took SK’s insane rapid-fire singing and infectious tongue-in-cheek delivery to dance-floors around the world. 23. “NULIFE” - MAIA (BRIS)

BRISBANE neo-neo-soul singer/producer MAÏA returned to form in 2016 with her nostalgic, intimate “LOFI” Mixtape. “NULIFE” - a definite standout will swallow you up whole in a blanket of warm, jazzy melodies and pulsating rimshots. Coming very early in the year, this track really pre-empted a lot of trends that are dominating American music culture as we speak. We predict huge things for MAIA in 2017. 22. “$AUCE” - GREMLNS (MELB)

2016 was the year of the GREMLN in the suburbs of MELB. No other underground AUS rap squad made more of an impact than these guys in the last 12 months. This “SAUCE” video came about after months of anticipation and was defs worth the wait. It showed the GREMSQUAD more polished-than-ever, a bunch of real young talents standing at the crossroads between street-fame and industry acceptance. The video itself is like a cross between an old-school Tarantino movie and a London GRIME vid, but set in some unmistakably murky Burn-city graffiti spots. 21. “BERETTA” - MATT BLACK (SYD)

SYDNEY-based vocalist MATT BLACK exploded out of the blocks last year with a series of MIRACLE/DOPAMINE produced R&B/SOUL singles - the type big labels dream about every night. “BERETTA” is the whole package. A high-concept, slow-burning, futuristic love-song which cleverly compares a lover to a pistol. Two things that (depending on the circumstances) can save you or destroy you, make u feel like a man or a mouse. 20. “EVERYDAY” - DREAM$TEAM (ADEL)

So much love for duo’s with vastly different voices. When you listen to a DREAM$TEAM you got no time for boredom. You’ve got CHARLTON on the first verse who always goes in with this SHAKE070-style flow and A-grade emotionally-charged lyricism, then the other G comes in riding world-class auto-tune vibes that sit somewhere between YACHTY & TRAVI$ SCOTT. The production, which features ZAYTOVEN-style piano, is the opposite of corny… bounces hard & leaves plenty of room for vocals. These guys are insanely talented for their age-bracket. Anythings possible for them in 2017 19. “TENNIES” - TKAY MAIDZA (ADEL)

TKAY MAIDZA, easily one of the most successful artists on this list had a huge 2016. She was spun on SKRILLEX’s OWSLA radio show, played a tonne of festivals in AUS & FRANCE, but most importantly dropped a huge studio album, TKAY, which featured guest verse from KILLER MIKE (Run The Jewels). “TENNIES” was our favourite track from the album, because it combined her signature worldly sugar-rap with some hella uplifting footwork vibes. How often is boundary-pushing music this much fun? 18. “LAPUTA (TAYLOR MCFERRIN REMIX ft. ANDERSON PAAK)” - HIATUS KAIYOTE (MELB)

The one and only MELB-based GRAMMY-nominated future-soul quartet that we probs should have posted by now had to have a presence on this list, at least to show you all what’s possible. Their second album “CHOOSE YOUR WEAPON” is a must listen, but was released waybach in 2015. Last year, TAYLOR MCFERRIN recruited ANDERSON PAAK to rework standout single “LAPUTA” for a remix EP. The results speak for themselves. 17. “PEACEWALKER” - GALLU$, RAIDER KING (BRIS)

GALLU$ was real cult-force down in BRISBANE last year. His influence on the scene transcended his recordings - a huge statement considering the quality of songs like “PEACEWALKER”. This one features some heavy statements screamed with a natural Aussie accent over “GLASSSS” by PYRMDPLAZA. 

“THIS INDUSTRY’S FAKE & THE PEOPLE TALK BULLSHIT // THAT SOUNDS PRETTY OBVIOUS // SO WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING? // QUESTIONING MY OWN MUSIC LIKE // EVERY LINE THAT I WRITE // CAN’T HELP BUT FEEL STUPID.” - nuff said. 16. “ALL OF MI LIFE (MACHINEDRUM REMIX)” - YAW FASO (MELB)

2016 was a year where artists like POPCAAN & J HUS were getting love on THE FADER + DRAKE/BIEBER/SKRILLEX were jacking sounds from the Caribbean and breaking billboard records. When our own YAW FASO shared this MACHINEDRUM remix of his sun-drenched single “ALL OF MI LIFE” the timing was perfect, but as the hook declares, he wasn’t riding any trends. Reggae is one of the few genres that makes you smile, dance and forget about all your issues. This song, bursting with: FASO’s highly motivational reggae mantras, sugary buildups and super-refreshing production does all the above. 15. “IDK” - GILL BATES (BRIS)

With his LESS STRESS, MORE SUCCESS EP, GILL BATES showed a whole new side of himself to the world in 2016. Standout cut “IDK” took the catchier side of AUS rap into unknown territory: substance & self-awareness. Above all tho, it’s just a great song. That larger-than-life JAMES DAMIAN ANGUS production grabs you from 0:01… GILL’s opening line “BEEN DROWNING MY SORROWS // BOTTLE AFTER BOTTLE” takes you into his psyche… Then GILL & JAMES drag you deeper and deeper into darkness before flipping things with a bittersweet xylophone-driven hook. A world-class highlight from one of the best local releases in 2016. 14. “NEVER BEEN” - TYRØNE (SYD)

In the last 12 months, few local artists worked harder than TYRØNE. The SYDNEY rapper/producer legit dropped a full EP Trilogy, brimming with GOAT Australian rap lyricism. Song, after song the guy managed to craft a unique aesthetic for himself and his music – darkness that isn’t fake. “NEVER BEEN”, a real standout encapsulates this dedication to his craft more than any other. That skin-tight baritone flow just doesn’t stop on this one. “I SAY LIFE IS EVERYTHING YOU MAKE IT // ONE THING DAMN RIGHT I AIN’T NEVER BEEN FAKE BITCH” 13. “HIT EM” - I AM D (BRIS)

BRISBANE one-man-movement I AM D flew way under our radar until we heard this one. “HIT EM” showcased D’s near iconic nu-AUSSIE rap tone, through a stream of SKEPTA-like vocal punches that explained every move he would make in the local scene. Little did we know at the time, but he actually went on to achieve everything he rapped on this track. In a matter of months after its release: he got signed to a major label, dropped a hugely successful EP, landed a national tour and stamped his influence on the local culture. 12. “NO FATIGUE (ft. GEEK & SELASIE WUSSAH)” - CULT SHØTTA (SYD)

The video for “NO FATIGUE” really set the tone for CULT SHØTTA season in 2016. They were always a truly unique presence in the Australian rap game, but on this track, they toned things down, unleashing line-after-line of vibrant acid-raps over a relatively sparse bass-driven trap beat. As per usual, CHARLES X, GEEK & SELASIE WUSSAH each brought their A-game, showing off vastly different styles/personas, each challenging different “AUSTRALIAN RAP” taboos in the process. It also marked the beginning of director RUFFY’s much-needed string of ambitious video-work that helped elevate many-a local rapper last year. 11. “FOR GOOD (ft. SAMPA THE GREAT)” - REMI (MELB)

Couldn’t think of a better ’16 feel-good Aus-rap summer anthem than REMI and SAMPA’s “FOR GOOD” if I tried. When your air-con breaks on a 35 degree day, this song could actually save ur life. The production, hook and overall vibe really feels like a classic Triple J anthem, the type that soundtracked our lives. But, obviously everything has been re-worked for the next-generation, creating a crisper, more sonically diverse hit than we’re used to. 10. “EXISTENTIALITY” - OJIKAE (MELB)

“EXISTENTIALITY” is a lovesick vision that’s refreshingly different from the over-saturated BILLBOARD TOP 100-style R&B that the likes of TORY LANEZ and BRYSON TILLER put out. It was also the very first track released by 17 y.o VCE student Matt Cicero, which blew us away immediately last JULY. The guy wrote something original, produced the track himself and whipped out a spine-tingling vocal performance that singlehandedly dragged his ass all the way to the top 10 of this list. 9. “ASSUMPTIONS” - MANU CROOKS (SYD)

“ASSUMPTIONS” was premiered on ZANE LOWE’s BEATS1RADIO show… got our mag a global shoutout AND tore stages apart across the country in 2016. We heard more sides of Sydney game-changer MANU CROOKS than ever before on this one. With help from production masterminds DOPAMINE & MIRACLE, CROOKS departed from them brooding Toronto vibes to show Australia & the world that he can can TURN UP like the best of them. 8. “CALL ME” - DEVARN (MELB)

This song is what THANK GUARD is all about. Sonically, it’s right up our alley… but more importantly it came from a creative young dude who: thinks for himself and punches well-above his weight considering the resources/money some people on this list have at their disposal. It also tells a story we have witnessed for years now…

“ALL OF MY N*GGAS THEY WORK IN THE SUN // WAITING FOR LABELS TO HIT UP THEY PHONE // I WANT SOME MONEY TO GET ME A PHONE” Few rappers can get you on their side like Melbourne’s DEVARN. His vocals are earnest, intimate - when he raps, it feels like he’s letting you into his world. He doesn’t slur his words, or smother them in auto-tune either - you can hear every word the man is saying. Also, huge props for referencing some of our fav underground anthems >> SAUCE (GREMLNS) >> MOOSHAMAD // I HAD A DREAM WE GON’ MAKE IT. Damn. 7. “000000” - MIDAS.GOLD (BRIS)

Last year, Brisbane’s MIDAS.GOLD elevated himself to the Mount Rushmore of this new-wave. Of all the wild trap releases & intimate soul-searching cuts on his huge FOR WHAT IT’S WORTH EP, “000000” had the biggest impact on the scene. It dropped all the way back in JANUARY when local rappers were all bumping FUTURE & YOUNG THUG 24/7, but still didn’t truly believe that an Aussie could incorporate these sounds into their music so convincingly. MIDAS truly made this quality JAMES DAMIAN ANGUS/MO LIASON beat his bitch from 0:01, before abruptly taking the track down a notch in its last third, flipping the beat and creating a Schoolboy Q-esque bleary-eyed, kushed-out vibe that eased the track out from its original energy. 6. “WHIP IT” - BIG SKEEZ

We’ve been huge supporters of BIG SKEEZ for a long time. Every track he dropped in 2016 wreaked of originality in both vision and character. SKEEZ, a dude climbing his way up a ladder of: elegant email signatures, cut-throat managers and concrete industry rules, often collaborated with us thru a simple fb message - or just bumping into him in the city. This made us question the likelihood of his success to some extent, but when this video for “WHIP IT” dropped, it turned all our dreams into a reality. The WAVY BADMON, along with his SYDNEY crew absolutely owned the big screen, turning up like a pro to one of the standout tracks from his under-rated debut mixtape. Seeing this whole evolution transpire before our very eyes gave this CERNE STUDIOS production a real sentimental value for the whole THANK GUARD team. 5. “ABSURD” - ANFA ROSE (SYD)

ANFA ROSE and DOPAMINE’S magnum opus will make you cry like a Canadian watching Drake sing the national anthem. The silky smooth, “Absurd” is a beautifully executed blend of 808s, pianos and harmonies. When it comes to polish, no local track released in 2016 comes close to this one. DOPAMINE stripped back that instrumental, focusing on an ethereal and ominous beat with a chordal pattern that slides effortlessly from note to note. ROSE’s delicate melodies fuse perfectly with the instrumental and his lyrics, which are reminiscent of DRAKE’s odes to RIHANNA, or THE WEEKND’s odes to drugs. 4. “RUN IT (ft. LEVI, PHANTOM & KMALITH)” - MIKE WANG (MELB)

When low-key GREMLN MICHAEL WANG dropped this fire squad track all borders between Australia & America went up in flames. The MELBOURNE underground literally outshone the AUSTRALIAN i-Tunes charts. Nothing would make sense ever again. In terms of flow, lyricism and local impact… this was without a doubt one of the best Australian rap tracks released in 2016. WANG, LEVI, PHANTOM & KMALITH came out, guns blazing with their own jaw-dropping take on that MIGOS-style flow (and this was all before “BAD & BOUJEE” blew up). That little OVO-style hook/breakdown “I GOT BANDS…” really added a whole other dimension to the song too. Don’t even get me started on the message behind these lyrics and their relevancy to our scene, the city of MELBOURNE and the racial/cultural tensions often overlooked by most Australians. 3. “BLOWIN’ UP (ft. MIRACLE)” - MANU CROOKS (SYD)

“BLOWIN UP” was MANU CROOKS flipping the switch and making a statement: his rise to success is about much more than bangerz. Being able to rap and record full-time is any local rapper’s dream and seeing the SYDNEY rapper get premiered on The FADER must have motivated thousands of Australian teenagers to keep hustling in 2016. Honestly, didn’t think someone from this new AUS rap-scene would make the pages of a mag like The FADER for at least another year. That stamp of approval means a lot. Manu’s tuned-up, magnetically charismatic vocals definitely stole the show on this one…Dude just seems to know exactly what to rap and when. But, none of this would have been possible without his equally talented bros: DOPAMINE & MIRACLE who both shined, bright as ever on this one. 
DOPAMINE always knows just the right amount of syrupy autotune to sprinkle over his mates vocals & this beat speaks for itself. MIRACLE’S production and vocals contributions always help bring a track to the next-level. All 3 of these guys will no-doubt make even more Australian-rap history in 2017. 2. “WDUBI (ft. NASTY MARS & MARCUS)” - BARO (MELB)

When the mind of a black sheep is re-configured to entertain the mindless masses, an artist has reached their final frontier. BARO (NASTY MARS & MARCUS) did this last year with “WDUBI” - the first taste from his eagerly-awaited JPYNTK tape. On first encounter, it plays as the perfect Australian new-gen rap jam. But on further inspection, everything about it: the production, vocal stylings and somber sonic undertones expose it for the beautiful alien it really is. All three verses loosely acknowledge US 2K16 rap (CHANCE, GAMBINO etc), but overall this track really does’t follow the rules set by the American market at all - which is why we love it so much. That NIC MARTIN production plays a huge roll in this also. Something about those double-timed snares/claps and the tempo made this one feel so damn refreshing. We really played the fuck out of this one last year. THANK GUARD. Oh btw “AND IF WE HAVE A SON I THINK WE’LL NAME HIM STEVEN” - line O.T.Y 1. “BLUE BOSS” - SAMPA THE GREAT (SYD)

LMAO. In 2016, a lot of local bro’s hyped their shit like crazy. Walking around like the TUPAC reincarnate, talking smack online & sharing videos on FB 10 times a day… and SAMPA THE GREAT quietly drops a song that makes them all look foolish, raising her to instant-legend status. SAMPA is emotionally mature, intellectually elegant, socially conscious. Her words can fight wars or comfort a child. She is the type of person you’d want running for president, let alone running the local rap scene. “BLUE BOSS” is like a world-class 2K16 surprise rap-hit, but also feels timeless. Unlike kindred spirits NONAME & KAMAIYAH, SAMPA keeps her production and overall-vibe as earthy as possible, creating her own unique place in the rap-world. Considering the desperate need for more female rappers in this country, the quality of SAMPA’s vocals and her all-too-rare modest demeanour, we had to give “BLUE BOSS” the #1 spot. Posted by PAULINE HANSON