#higgs monaghan fanfic

[raiiner]

lord help me. crossdresser version below

[wintrsss]

『Having a Crush on a Porter』

Fandom: Death Stranding

Characters: Sam, Higgs.

Genre: Fluff, Headcanon.

Warnings: Slight spoilers to Higgs' backstory, but nothing major; mention of stalking. Reader is gender neutral!

A/N: 'DDS' is delivery dependence syndrome for those who don't know/ forgot! It's mentioned in Sam's part.

Requests open!

.ೃ࿐

-

Sam Porter Bridges

Sam isn't one to want to interact other porters, he's just there to get the job done, nothing more

You two just coincidentally met at the same location when completing your orders

And then it happened again. And again... and again. That was when you just had to get to know eachother, you of course starting the conversations, which then lead you two to become friends after a good while

Sam is always looking out for you, telling you to take breaks when you need and telling you to watch out for the MULEs during your deliveries, wouldn't want you to get DDS or getting your things stolen

If he finds an area that was hard to traverse or has a lot of timefall, he'll put up upcoming warning signs or, if he's got the time, build timefall shelters with you in mind

In his opinion, he doesn't think you should be a porter, but that's just his worried self talking

'This job is too dangerous, you shouldn't waste your life on something like this', is something that runs through his mind when he thinks about you, but he knows you're fully capable of handling yourself out there, as much as he hates to admit it

Would he confess to you? Most likely not, unfortunately

Sam is more of a lone wolf type of guy with all he's been through, so not only does he prefer to keep it that way for those reasons, but he doesn't want to ruin the already existing relationship between you two

Sam fears losing you, both to death and if you were to end your friendship

So if keeping the good friendship he has with you comes at the cost of the two of you not developing into something more, then so be it

Let's just hope it's you who confesses for him

-

Higgs Monaghan

Unknowing enemies to lovers lol

In all honesty, he only took interest when he saw you frequently talk to Sam while delivering

And he knows Sam of all people wouldn't have a friend, I mean come on! Why would anyone want to talk to him?

So what was with you? He couldn't get it off of his mind, and he didn't want to admit he was jealous that Sam got the attention of someone who genuinely liked being around him and he didn't

And so he made it his duty to take your attention off of Sam and onto him instead, as he can't stand Sam of all people having something he doesn't

It doesn't take long for him to thinking of you romantically, with all the stalking he's done on you

You're his new pizza delivery person from now on, get ready to have your email spammed by a certain 'Peter Englert'

Look, he already likes to mess with Sam on his deliveries, do you really think you'll be any different?

Though, it won't be done by the same hate he has for Sam, rather, he does it out of his own enjoyment of watching you struggle with deliveries

He'll even go as far as to mess with you while you're delivering his orders, but not too much since he still cares about his pizza

But if you manage to deliver his things on time and in good condition, he'll be sure 'Peter' gives you many compliments on your delivery, ever so grateful for your effort

So basically, during your time as a porter, you'll be shown both his "good" and "bad" sides without even knowing they're the same person

If he ever decided on trying to confess to you, he wouldn't say it outright, deeming it a bit too "cliché" for his tastes. Instead, he would write for you in one of his emails (or in all of them until you finally realize lol) a secret message for you to decipher on your own

Which is just him spelling out something like 'I like you' or 'ur hot' with the first letters of his sentences. Nothing too complex, but also enough to let that nerdy side of him out

[moosifers]

Sad But True | Fragile & Higgs Monaghan | 2K words | Teen | Tags: Angst, Hurt No Comfort, the Beach (Death Stranding), Bad Things Happen Bingo

What happened between Fragile and Higgs on the Beach.

READ HERE

My first entry for @badthingshappenbingo for the prompt Rejected Apology :)

[danddymaro]

Fate | Higgs Monaghan x Reader

Another idea somewhat Similar to Follow me , where he finds the reader stranded.

Wordcount: 1061

Fate

The gold-trimmed edge that your exploring digits slid across felt icy as it met their numbness.

It felt like nothing, yet something simultaneously, and in your delirious mind, you couldn't fathom what stood before you.

As you looked up the image of death that stared down, he, himself, was intently focused on your caress; on the acceptance you greeted it with as your knees visbally quivered.

-As your mortality was evident.

"Stay with me…" you begged.

Although it'd been a possibility, you'd always feared dying alone.

But even so, If you'd spent your life seldom, would it be greedy to ask for just a touch of mercy at your end?

Even if it was from death itself.

Somewhere in your mind, where all of your collected thoughts that hardly mattered went, it existed.

"Please?" you were not above begging, hoping to trade off your end with something kinder.

Your hazy vision became even more obscured by your sorrow, making gloom and gold the only thing you could make out.

Heavy thunderstorms boomed far in the distance, their echoes, though merely fractions of their true roar, still making you shiver as they reached you.

'It's cold…'

"It's So cold," you shivered, and you dared to complain with a shattered smile.

You broke before the sky did, and as you did, you cried.

The soaked ground beneath you felt as though it'd swallowed you down with each step you took, and before you collapsed to its suffocating demise, you put all of your strength into holding on to what was closest.

The hooded figure held genuine curiosity that was conveyed by the slow head tilt that proceeded as he watched with interest.

-then surprised at your desperation as your arms held onto his legs.

Much more, when you looked up at him with strangely beautiful eyes that held not only the sorrows of the day but the ghosts of their predecessors.

He felt something odd, something forgiving.

a hand gloved in the same thick, black material that draped over his golden, ghastly face came down to you.

It fell to the crown of your head with its large palm before it dipped down and slowly shifted.

Soon, the back of his fingers scaled down your somber expression before it rested, as the deep blue gaze hidden behind shadows and thick lenses admired you.

Death, as you knew it gazed down at you with a flourish of something tangible as you existed with peace in the comfort of his single hand that had done nothing but form craters and bring disaster.

Beneath his mask that hid his true face, Higgs smiled.

He did so gently as he tutted at such a precious find in this world of seemingly endless cataclysms.

He came down to your level, and as your lip quivered while you tried to speak, a finger was pressed to them, gently seeking silence from you.

"Shhh..."

If only you knew how alluring you looked when you gazed up at him so utterly hopeful for his mercy, you wouldn't later have the insistency to question him on the matter.

★ ★ ★

"Higgs," you said with interest as you looked over to the large beast he created, bringing it forth with the same hand that had been so gentle with you before and had never once searched for you amid the dooms he created.

"Darlin?" he asked back with a soft purr, hardly turning to look at you, only shifting his eyes.

And without the placement of that mask you've gotten so used to gazing at, you could actually catch the moment his eyes greeted yours, rather than just feel it.

Against your will, your smile formed, although it was soft and nearly nonextant as he addressed you, never with your name, but with something sweeter.

You stepped closer to him and as you did, the gear you wore, and that had once felt like just a bit too much felt like a second part of you.

Either by coincidence or careful planning, it matched his, and it made you feel somewhat closer, moreso when he'd been so animated when he'd presented it to you, pointing out the detail.

-Especially the cloak that flowed just a bit longer than his did.

"More coverage," he murmured as he brought down your hood and marveled at you with what started off as a musing pout, then morphed into a triumphant grin.

He made sure to clothe you properly, where not a drop could reach you, and it was without a doubt he cared about you.

But why?

"Why do you keep me around?" you asked him, and as self-deplorable as the question should sound, you held more curiosity than anything.

You could see his eyes gently close as a little smirk tugged at his lips,

"That little question of yours..." he murmured as his mask manifested, and he finally decided to turn to you, approaching you with ease.

And the man who almost always had something to say, fell silent.

Soon reaching you, the back of his fingers began to caress the length of your face before they dipped down your chin and fell to his side again.

If only he could tell you why he'd kept you so close, saving you from the timefall; why he'd created rifts in dimensions to ensure your safety while knowing nothing about you.

-if only he knew himself.

But all he could really tell you was the events of the day, just as you remembered them.

As he approached you, he moved just as the beast he created did, with a predatory stalk that rounded prey before it pounced.

Soon he stood behind you, and as his arm fell over your shoulder and crossed your chest, he held you close, his obscured face resting by your neck.

He took in a long breath while your body submitted, falling back into his embrace that felt so familiar and comforting.

"Fate... I suppose," he murmured coyly as the sky roared, and the air felt thicker.

And if you admitted to anyone else how much you loved the atmosphere now, you'd be considered just as deranged as the man who held you so gently now.

"So cold..." you breathed, not really bothered by the weather, finding warmth in your gear, and the transferred heat of his embrace.

" Hold me closer...."

[savage-rhi]

Brisk Harpy: a courier organization dedicated to helping colonies out West primarily in areas where the UCA/Chiral Network can't reach. Gene Dawkins took up work at Brisk Harpy following her departure from Middle Knot City.

DUAT: A team of 6 individuals recruited by an offbranch of the UCA to allegedly assist with research pertaining to BTs and Beaches. Rumor has it the 6 are embued with special abilities and powers that give them domain over entities...Of course, that's hearsay. There may also be a 7th member but nothing substantial evidence wise as come forward.

**my new Death Stranding fanfic isn't coming out for a while, but I felt like making logos for two organizations that'll be featured. If you've read Sky of Atoms, Brisk Harpy should be familiar. DUAT though, is something new 👀

[skys-metro]

Chapter four is finally up 👉👈

[filthycasualhobbies]

Sacrifices

One day I might actually be able to write things in the order they're supposed to go, but for now, I'm just writing the moments that pop into my head.

-------------------------------------

In the darkness behind his eyelids, all he could hear was the crunch of sand under a pair of patent leather pumps as they slowly circled around him. His angel of calamity, silently appraising him as he knealt on the beach, waiting for her direction. He was suprised when instead she asked him a question.

"Where do you go?" Her tone implied curiosity, though something a little darker seemed to lurk beneath. He ignored it.

"I'm just lookin' around, checkin' on Sam, keepin' things in motion." He gazed at her beautiful face as she stood over him, her brow knit in what seemed like disappointment. Lowering herself, she took his chin in her hand. The smile that curved her lips did not reach her eyes.

"Liar."

It felt as though he was being pushed deeper into the sand by the weight of her gaze. Clearing his throat, he lowered his head. "They've got nothing to do with this-"

A soft scoff left her lips. Her hand dropped from his chin and she stood, pacing a few steps away before turning back to face him, her disappointment now clearly clouding her features. "They have -everything- to do with this." Amelie sighed, her voice soft and reasoned. "There can be no hesitation here. No distractions. You know that."

Beneath his hood Higgs' jaw clenched. If she knew about them, she should know that they were only waiting for it all to end. Waiting to watch the world go up in flames together with him. How could that possibly be a detriment to their end game…?

"I know."

"Sacrifices must be made. The greater the sacrifice, the more powerful it is." Amelie returned to him, lowering herself once again, reaching to carefully push back the hood of his cloak, smoothing his hair. "You do this and there will be nothing stopping you. Not even Sam." She cupped his cheek. "Do not forget your purpose."

Higgs closed his eyes, lowering his head. His reply was a whisper. "Yes ma'am." He leaned back, away from her, pulling his hood back over his head, hiding his face once more. Careful not to appear avoidant, he slowly rose to stand, his breath steady. "Of course, I'll take care of it." He bowed before vanishing in a flurry of chiralium, leaving his extinction entity alone on her beach.

[fallenlostboy]

Finally I can post this here because it's FINISHED!!!!

(There's still editing going on, chapter by chapter, but it's officially finished!)

I'm so excited and so thrilled!

Thank you so much to my friends in The Beach discord server and especially to @skys-metro for screaming into the void late at night with me about ideas and plot bunnys

💚💚

[cuddlypillow]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Death Stranding (Video Games) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Higgs Monaghan/Reader, Higgs Monaghan/You, Higgs Monaghan & You, Higgs Monaghan & Reader Characters: Higgs Monaghan, Reader, You Additional Tags: Smut, Shameless Smut, PWP, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, no y/n, GN!READER, genderneutral reader, Fingering, Sex, Rough Sex, mention of choking, Higgs has total switch energy, top higgs, Not Beta Read Summary:

You and Higgs get surprised by heavy timefall on a patrol run for the Demens but you know how to waste some time.

[cn-4amsleeper]

Sometimes I’d encounter a paragraph of what I thought to be a Higgs x Sam fanfic and then it’s just Death Stranding official novelization.

[sanctaignorantia]

Higgs is the type of person who has cold feet and Sam is the type of person who has very warm hands, Sam will always warm Higgs...

@love-bigboss1fan-me this is for you! Thanks for request! ❤️

I can doodle something for you

[thepaperpanda]

The Tarry Gift || Higgs Monaghan x Reader (yet Sam makes a short guest apperance too!)

Summary: it had to be a simple delivery after a longer time of being indisposed. Little did you know that the client was Higgs Monaghan himself

Warnings: none     

Words: 2728

Authors: Cass & Bear

A/N: This is a comedy fic. We wrote it accidentally while just playing around with writing a thing for Higgs Monaghan character but it came out so laughably that we decided to share it with you! ENJOY!

You hoped for a lot as for the first delivery since a long time but instead, you’d gotten pizza delivery. A fucking pizza.

You took the box and headed to the destination.

When the terminal beeped, Higgs narrowed his eyes. Quickly a realization came - it could be nothing but pizza! 

Oh, how much he hoped to finally meet Sam in his bunker! 

How much he craved to see Sam's face when he will realise that Peter Englert was no one else but Higgs himself!

Before putting his hood on, he checked his makeup and smiled at his reflection in a mirror. "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the meanest of them all?," He smirked widely to his reflection so the whiteness of his teeth glistened back in a light of lamp and Higgs chuckled.

He checked his outfit for the very last time and walked to open the door.

"Oh, Sam Bridges! Guess you're happy to..... Who the fuck are you?"

"Who the fuck are you?," You asked with a frown, still holding pizza box in your hands.

The last thing you needed now was being insulted by an aspiring beauty guru. "I have your pizza, mr Englert."

"Where's Sam Bridges?," He asked, measuring your features from the bottom to the top.

You shrugged. "He left before I did. Even if he is my friend I don't really know where he is. Why do you ask?"

"Nevermind. Oh, where are my manners? Please, come in, come in," he gestured at you to get inside the bunker.

"Uhm…," You felt confused, most of the time you interacted with holograms and no one ever invited you inside. "Uhm, I don't know if I should."

"Oh, don't bullshit me!," He simply grabbed your forearm and pulled you inside. When he did, the door closed automatically.

Now you felt scared as fuck and the locked door made you scared even more. "Uhm... Your pizza,” you passed the box to the man in the hood.

With his hood still on, Higgs grabbed the pizza box from you and humming happily he went further along the narrow corridor. "Oh, c'mon! Don't stand like an idiot. Get in!"

You swallowed heavily and nodded, following him. You didn't like it but you had no other option.

The corridor led to a huge chamber.

The walls were covered with handwriting, maps and pictures of no one else but Sam Bridges.

Almost in the middle of the room there was a couch and a table. Under the table there were empty pizza boxes.

Man flopped on the couch and opened the box he was holding in hands. He grabbed a slice of pizza and took a bite. He hummed. "Delicious. Make yourself at home. Want some?," He asked, offering you pizza. "Salami and ham."

You looked around and felt the shivers moving up your spine. This didn't look good and you wanted to run. "No, thanks… I don't like salami or pizza itself."

He shrugged. "Whatever you say, honeypot," he replied and ate his slice of pizza only to grab another

"Don't call me that. I don't even know you. Why am I here even?!," You growled angrily while rubbing your elbow.

"The name's Higgs, the particle of God that permeates all existence. You brought pizza and you are the friend of Sam Bridges who is my greatest enemy of all time. So technically, you're kidnapped," Higgs claimed.

You blinked, processing what he just said. "Excuse me...? You kidding, right? I wanna go out. Let me out."

"Take a seat and have some pizza. Rest. Make yourself at home. You're not going anywhere."

"I don't like pizza!," You growled. "I want to go home! I have other stuff to do."

"Shhh, shhh, shhh, stop talking, I can't gather my thoughts when you're yapping like a puppy," Higgs finished his pizza and laid on the couch.

"LET ME OUT YOU, PSYCHO!," You yelled and stomped a few times.

He didn't listen. After a long moment he got up and walked to the desk where a laptop was placed. He took it with him and sat back on the couch.

You frowned and moved closer to close the laptop with your palm. "Let me you! Do you understand English?"

"Can you stop yapping, pretty please?," He pulled the hood off his head and furrowed his brows.

"Can you stop being a dick and let me out?!," You growled. "Sam won't just come because I am gone."

"Oh, he'll. I'm mailing him, don't worry, he's going to come for you," Higgs replied. "If I was a dickhead, you'd be tied up and I'd put a rag into your mouth to shut you up. I didn't do anything. I even offered you pizza! Ah, people are so ungrateful these days."

"Says the guy that kidnapped an innocent woman. You want me to be grateful for keeping me here?," You asked in disbelief, crossing arms over your chest.

"Oh-ho, I heard the storm has come! It's better here I think, you're dry and not exposed to BTs. Or... Are you truly safe here?," He smirked wryly and snapped his fingers.

Without a blink of an eye the floor turned into tar and a creature formed out of it. It was a lion BT with a golden snout. It roared at you.

"Holy Beach!," You whimpered and sat on the couch right next to him, pulling knees right under your chin. "Take it away! I am sorry! I will be good!"

The lion tilted its head and shook its mane, roaring and yawning. Next, the creature licked its paw and sat right in front of you.

"Don't worry, it won't hurt you unless I order so," Higgs informed as he was writing the email.

You only nodded your head, too scared to even move or breathe.

"If you need a hug, you can just tell me," Higgs chuckled. "I'm a great cuddler."

Lion hit your knee with its paw, roaring.

"I would never touch you, ever. I am scared of this thing," you explained, pointing at the lion and whimpering loudly when it hit your knee.

"Don't you see? He demands being petted," Higgs glared at you. "Go on. Pet him. Like this," he reached out and stroked the mane made of tar.

You nodded and slowly tried to pet the lion how Higgs instructed you.

It resulted in a loud purring that was followed by a tail wiggling, sending some tar on the walls. Soon, the lion laid down, his belly exposed.

You looked at Higgs. "Really? I thought BTs are more scary," you said and bent down to scratch the lion's belly.

Lion's paw started shaking as you hit the very right spot. The puring became louder. 

Higgs raised his brow while looking at you. "Ah, right. They are scary, indeed. Just don't try this with others outside because they'll kill ya," he reminded. "Ah! Done! Now we only gotta wait for Sam to come and rescue you from the oppression!"

"You think I am that stupid to pet every BT I see?," You asked with a frown. "I don't think he will come but I at least can pet the lion..."

Lion grabbed your arm with both front paws and pulled you to him more so you fell off the couch. 

Higgs chuckled. "I forgot to tell you that he is too demanding sometimes."

"I can see! I will need a shower… Ah, I just took one before I left the facility," You sighed sadly, petting the lion.

Lion opened the snout and trailed its tarry tongue across your face.

You only whimpered and sighed defeatedly.

Soon, the terminal beeped again.

"Your saviour has come apparently!," Higgs informed you excitedly and rubbed his hands together getting off the couch.

He walked to the main door of his bunker and put hood back on. He touched the touchpad on the wall and the door opened. "Ah, Sam Bridges! We can finally meet in person!"

Sam put the case he was holding in his hand down on the stone floor and cocked his brow. "Higgs. We do know each other."

"Yes! But technically you came here to meet Peter Englert. So?," He sent Sam  a wide grin.

Sam let out a sigh. "Higgs. I know you're Peter Englert. Now, can I get Y/N back?"

"Yes, please! I'd like to go home, even if I like the lion!," You yelled from the floor while you were still petting the creature. Too bad you couldn't keep it.

Sam narrowed his brows. "Excuse me, is she inside? How? What for?"

"I'll share a secret with you," Higgs put hands to Sam's shoulders and leaned forward to trace the tip of his tongue along Sam's cheek. "I let her in and she enjoyed our common time."

"Get off, man!," Sam pushed Higgs off and wiped his cheek with the top of his gloved palm. "Y/N! Move on!"

You rubbed the lion's snout. "I started to like you. I need to go now, you cute, little thing. Maybe we'll meet again and you won't eat me then!," You said to the creature and got up to quickly run to Sam. "Hi," you give him a smile as soon as you step out of Higgs' bunker.

Sam measured your figure from the bottom to the top with shock written on his face. "Were you fighting BTs? Did he do something to you?," Sam asked, pointing right on Higgs who instantly shook his head for no, raising his hands up.

“He locked me in his safe room and was rude to me but at least he let me pet his BT lion. It's messy as hell but I really loved it," you explained with excitation, looking at Higgs. "Too bad I can't have one."

Higgs sent you a grin and snapped his fingers once again. Within the blink of an eye once again a little puddle of tar appeared at the entrance and a little BT lion cub stepped out of it, meowing loudly.

"Omg, hi, little one!" You laughed and picked the creature gently up. "You are mine now."

"Hola, hola!," Sam raised his tone. "You're not going to take a BT with you. Put it back, now, I am not joking, Y/N. You won't get the BT from this deluded guy."

Higgs crossed arms over his chest. "Let her. This BT belongs to her now, you would have to chop the cord off."

"Exactly. It's mine," you looked at him with an innocent smile, hugging the cub.

The BT lion cub reached its tiny paw towards Sam, but the man immediately took a step back. "This is sick, ridiculous. What are you thinking, Y/N? That we'll get back to Bridges with that BT hidden in your backpack? And you," Sam pointed at Higgs. He was so done with Monaghan's actions and shady plans. "You better get the fuck out of my sigh, I'm so done and believe me - I would kill you but I know it won't affect you in any goddamn way."

Higgs chuckled. "It's good to be a repatriate after all, huh? Y/N, you can keep the BT," he winked at you.

"What's the fucking point of kidnapping her though," Sam pointed at you, "When you simply let her go? What the fuck is going on!"

You pet the cub and shrugged. "He was really disappointed when I came with pizza. So if I understood it correctly, he didn't plan to hurt me and only wanted to get your attention."

You moved a little closer to Sam. "Trust me, he must be a big fan of yours. His walls are decorated with your pictures," you whispered.

Sam cringed at the simple thought of his photos being attached to Higgs' walls. 

"I planned on killing you," Higgs claimed openly. "But she came instead of you, and she brought a good pizza. So I rethought my idea and today I won't kill anyone. What a lovely day, isn't it?!"

Higgs approached you and Sam and wrapped his slender arms around you two. "What a lovely day for the encounter!"

You cringed at the hug, knowing that Sam must have felt really uncomfortable with this.

Letting out an awkward laugh you patted Higgs' shoulder. "Yes, yes... It's nice but please, can you let us go?"

Monaghan measured your features with his steel blue eyes. "It's a shame such a beautiful woman is wasting her youth on being a porter though," he touched your cheek with a gloved hand and then leaned down and forward to get on the level of your head. "But due to the fact you were rather a good hostage, I'll let ya go," after these words he licked your cheek. "You taste so good."

Sam cringed harder at the sight and simply yanked you out of Higgs' grasp. "I have enough of you, I mean it," Sam told Monaghan who only chuckled. "What's so funny, Higgs? Maybe it's time to get a life, something?"

Higgs rubbed his bearded chin before replying. "You see, Sam, haunting you and turning your life in a fucking mess became one of the most beloved and fascinating hobbies of mine lately," Higgs concluded with a happy tone. "You're so much fun, aren't you? Especially when you're making all those grimaces of yours when I cause the tar being all over you," Higgs summed up.

Sam closed his eyes for a brief moment, trying to cool himself down. "Amelie created a goddamn psychotic monster," he summed up, his hands clenched in fists.

"Sam, let's go, okay? You two can fight some other time. If he lets us go, let's use it," you said, petting the little lion in your arms and starting to walk away. "Thank you for the lion!"

"The pleasure is mine and mine only, Y/N, it's a pleasure to meet you though. Remember, the name's Higgs!"

Sam dragged you down the hill, right to his car. "Are you insane?"

"Hey! He kidnapped me, did you forget? Okay, maybe more like inviting me inside and locked the door but I felt kidnapped!," You stated. "And since when do you touch anyone?!"

"Since you pissed me off with the childish behaviour of yours, Y/N, he could have killed you."

"Like you see he did not! Overall he was even nice to me. He gave me a little lion!"

Sam let go of your hand. "Don't get fooled by his sweet face," Sam raised his finger up, shaking it in front of your eyes. "He might look cute and behave cute but it's his deluded facade. He's a fucking delusional psychopath who gifted you with the fucking BT. It's nothing normal in this."

"But look. It's my BT now, it won't hurt me or anyone. It will be okay," you said and nodded. "I know but look, he didn't hurt me and I am fine."

"So maybe get back to his bunker and you two can live a happy life, how about that?," Sam growled. "Get in. Time to get back to Bridges as you spent more than half a day with the main terrorist of America."

"I was kidnapped! It's not like I could just leave. You also took your sweet time to get there," you let out a sigh and got in, rolling your eyes.

"I was working and getting throughout BTs territory to get your ass saved, Y/N, so don't bullshit me about me being delayed," he instructed as he took a seat at the wheel.

"Okay, sorry.”

"Ah, and put this fucking thing to the trunk, I don't need the upholstery to be covered in tar," added Sam while pointing at BT lion cub that was on your lap.

"It's connected to me. If the cub is going to the trunk then I go there as well," you answered, petting BT head.

"For fuck's sake. If your sweet tar cub will leave a single tar spot inside, I'll cut the cord, understood?," Sam growled

You rolled your eyes and looked away.

"And please, next time refrain from delivering pizza."

"Not my fault that this is what I get to do. You know that it's not my choice," you sighed looking out of the window.

Sam only nodded in silence. "So at least try to verify to whom you are delivering."

[wintrsss]

『S/O with High Level DOOMs』

Fandom: Death Stranding.

Characters: Sam, Higgs, Cliff.

Request: Can you maybe do Headcannons for a reader with high level DOOMS? Like sometimes just forgetting that (other then higgs) their S/O doesn't have DOOMS like they do? Not in like a dangerous situation but more like teleporting behind them and scaring them accidentally. How would they react and so on with things that just come with being a high level?

Genre: Fluff, Headcanon.

Warnings: None. Reader is gender neutral!

A/N: I'm sure you only wanted Sam and Higgs, but I included Cliff bc I love him <3 let's pretend he knows abt DOOMs

Requests open!

.ೃ࿐

-

Sam Porter Bridges

You'll scare the hell outta him if you teleport without letting him know about it, but with how reticent he is, you probably wouldn't notice

He only knows a handful of people who have DOOMs and only two can teleport, it's rare for him to see one who can. Can't blame him for getting a little alarmed

He is more than happy to pass you some spare cryptobiotes in the case you getting tired from teleporting. You clearly need them more than he does

He will get a little worried once you tell him you're at a high level, with all the repercussions it has, but other than that, he won't dwell on it too much

Sam isn't very good at dealing with emotional problems, but he is a good listener. If you need an ear to talk to about those nightmares, he'll stay quietly at your side. Sometimes he'll say some things that Amelie told him to make him feel better, hoping they'll help you too

He'd rather you not resort to any sort of violence unless it's self defense; there's no need for it. But hey, if you really wanna let off some steam, you should do it to the MULEs or something to clear the area for future porters. Do some good with it at least, right?

-

Higgs Monaghan

Half of him is excited to see you at a higher level like he is, the other half wants to show his superiority to you in every way

Sure, you can teleport like he can, but can you control BTs? Nuh uh, didn't think so

So yeah, with the many times he tries to brush aside your dooms abilities as less than par (compared to him), he's totally forgotten at least once

But after the first scare, you wont get him again! That's a promise!

With nightmares however, he may not understand your fear in them, seeing as he's already accepted mass extinction. He'll probably just tell you to go back to sleep without any thought

But if he sees you really shook from it, he'll at least try to comfort you, but it'll end up seeming really half-assed; he's just not used to cheering people up

Higgs isn't gonna be the one to dissuade you from any violent urges you may experience with DOOMs, in fact he's going to fuel the fire and encourage you to act upon these thoughts. Only thing he draws the line at is you hurting yourself

-

Cliff Unger

I would not advise trying to scare him with your teleporting because you WILL get put to the ground

He wasn't an army captain for no reason, his reflexes undoubtedly prove that

But with how tired you get from doing that, Cliff strongly advises you to not use it so often, especially if it's for your own pleasure of getting a reaction out of him

You having DOOMs fascinates him, he'd love to learn more if you're willing to tell him about it

He can empathize to an extent on the nightmares you receive from this condition, having had plenty of his own in the past, he'll do his best to try to comfort you during the bad ones, rubbing your back and whispering soft affirmations to you

He knows he doesn't have to, but he likes to wipe away your chiral tears

Cliff doesn't want you following the same path of destruction he's gone to, so he'll keep on eye out in any changes in your behavior so that he can help in any way he can

[samfrancis94]

Stranded (Part 1)

=======================================

This is the first part of a piece of DS fanfic I am writing that centers mostly around Higgs and a potential future where he gets a second chance at life (because he deserves it!).

(Also, my first written piece of fanfic here, so yay!)

Trigger Warning : Suicidal idealisation and depression

=======================================

It was useless; there was no way off this godforsaken place.

“Bed made, lie in it, all that bullshit,” he mumbled to himself as he continued to cough up seawater from his mouth, still lying on the dark sand of the Beach as he ran his fingers through it.

Higgs had been trying to leave the Beach for a while now. He thought that he would be able to bear with it ever since Fragile left him here "for good", and for the first few...days? Weeks? (He wasn't sure how long. Time flowed differently here, slower.) Well, when he first started out, it was fine. It was not really that much different from when he was stuck in that bunker with that man whom he called 'Father', and when he was hiding out in that bunker just west of Lake Knot City. He thought it was going to be a breeze.

But 'time' went and things worsened. The skies remained the same dull grey with the same clouds always seemingly rolling in from the same directions without any real meaningful changes to their patterns, and the briny sea air was beginning to feel increasingly stale and stagnant despite the breeze. The dreary, barren landscape surrounding the beach offered little to no stimulation and the tides were unchanging. The abject and dull 'sameness' at which everything around him seemed to be keeping to was slowly driving him mad. And it was then that he decided, that he needed to get off of this Beach.

However, no matter what he did, nothing seemed to work. He tried to jump at first, but that only reminded him that that bitch Amelie had taken all of his powers from him, so no. He tried to walk inland, hoping that if he continued to do so long enough, he might end up finding something that would suggest a potential exit point. He had gone in every direction that he could think of, and as soon as he reached a certain distance, he found himself crawling out of the sea back to the same beach with his lungs burning with seawater.

It was then that he started taking his chances with the sea. He theorized that since it was what always brought him back, it must have a door or portal of some kind somewhere.

If only that were true.

No matter how many times he dove in in search of that door or portal, much like when he was walking inland, the moment he arrived at a certain distance, he found himself back on the beach. This time, it was as though the sea about him would melt away and he would then fall onto the beach, as though he had been dropped in from the sky. And that hurt as much as -- if not more than -- having to crawl out of the sea choking and suffocating.

Having exhausted all possible means of escaping, Higgs was left with only one option. He had wondered if it would work, considering he wasn't even sure if he was alive to begin with. But what else could he do?

So, he waded into the water and like before, he went under, but this time, he didn't take a breath. He simply allowed himself to slip under and let whatever air was left in his lungs to bubble its way out through his nostrils and...

Needless to say, it didn't work. He found his way back to the Beach again, somehow, and this time, he was retching up dark bitter seawater from his burning lungs.

It was useless; there was no way off this godforsaken place. And even if there was, what then? It wasn't like things would be any better for him than they were when he was still...'alive'. Where would he go? What would he do? Who would even want him?

"Bed made, lie in it, all that bullshit," Higgs repeated to himself, as more seawater spilled through his chapped lips and tears flooded his eyes. He pulled his legs up to his aching chest and pressed his face into his knees.

===================================

Special thanks to the amazing @voidoutbt, @missteal1-blog ✒️✒️✒️ for helping me to proofread and edit this piece, and also with the trigger warning. ❤️🤍💙

Illustrations are done by me. If you wish to see more of my art, please head over to @samkuchingdraws. 👨‍🎨👨‍🎨👨‍🎨

===================================

[danddymaro]

Death Stranding | What I Have To Do

Previous:  Stolen Princess

Thoughts are italics in quotations = ‘Example’

Flashbacks are in italics = Example

A/N: ((Most of this takes place before the previous chapter.))

I honestly wish I would have put this in before, but oh well.

Word Count : 5256

What I Have To Do

Thunder trailed the route he took. Darkness cast over the footprints behind him as he continued to walk along the trail of pretty little flowers that would soon see an end.

“ Oh darling,” Higgs started, holding the woman close, cradling her body, and sharing as much warmth with her as he could. 

Smiling softly, he didn’t look back, instead, looking up at the clear sky before him and the wonderful azure that painted the atmosphere, 

“A little piece of heaven in this hell,” He said while he took one step forward, the long stride ending in a short spin of bliss.

“- The sound of this rain, I don’t think I could ever hate it.” he mused.

“- Because It’s our sound.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

- Hours Prior

The unrelenting sound of the seemingly never-ending, weighty downpour remained a part of the background as the two stayed awake together throughout the night.

 The occasional thunders that boomed outside had, for the most part, gone ignored in a sort of, 'out of sight, out of mind,' stand against the world and whatever assault it had to deliver, which wasn't too much unlike how life had become since the world had changed. 

Since life had become a survival; 

Since the explosion.

Tentatively, (f/n) looked up at Higgs, watching as he skimmed his eyes past every word of the book that lay before him.

He'd found it on a shelf a day prior and had been very languidly reading through the written words with what seemed like mild interest.

He wasn't entirely absorbed with it based on how much he frequently took it upon himself to look towards her and speak, paying more attention to the scattered talks they had throughout the last few hours than the piece of literature he had on the table.

(f/n) had difficulty not smiling when he looked at Higgs. 

He was a very sweet person, and they seemed to share a common trait ; 

They wanted someone there, or rather, they yearned for someone there. 

Higgs always had a strange, soft gloom in his eyes, and it always hit her when she aligned her sights with him because she identified with it so much that it felt like a reflection of her own gaze. 

'I would have never have imagined it, never have expected it... but I'm happy he's here,' She thought to herself, not quite sure she could really refer to him as a stranger anymore.

- Not when they’d share so much.

Perhaps if the tremendous storm had hit off while she was still alone she would have simply given in, accepting that her seldom, lonesome life was just so miserable, there wasn't a reason to keep trying. 

There would be no reason to wait for sunlight. 

There would be no reason to keep checking her emails, daily and desperately.

There was no reason for anything when the only thing that awaited her was an eventual, lonely death to pair with her uneventful existence.

 'But...' she then thought to herself, all as she retained a placid smile that barely lifted the corners of her mouth in the most delicate manner ever mustered, 'But I have a guest,' she added, musing over how even if she wanted to simply wither away now, it wasn't just her.

‘I have a friend,’ she thought with giddiness.

Originally she would have let happen what would happen, and it wasn’t like she would have had a choice anyway. She would meet an end whichever way, the only difference being that alone, she wouldn’t have put on a brave face.

She wouldn’t have battled through every day with a smile, a true expression that was of a person that had something left to enjoy.

She wouldn’t have hoped for one more day each and every night, hoping to somehow extend the hours of the day and prolong the ghastly visit of the reaper.

It would have been different before Higgs, but now she had company, pleasant company, and she wasn't going to let any of the wretched gloominess from the outside seep through just then.

Someone else occupied a seat in her home, and it felt so lovely. 

It felt like something she didn't want to let go of just yet. 

Somewhere, far deep within the crevasses of her mind, she hoped that if it was fate for her to fade away during the heavy downpour, then at least her last moments should be with someone else. 

There was still no reason to look forward to anything beyond the downpour, but at least smile now she could smile.

Her last sentiment would be something treasured and tender.

'This is …nice,' she thought with lightheartedness, the heavy aching that had been weighing down her heart lessened, but only somewhat. 

Try as she may, the returning thought of the Bridges porter always pathed way, because it was a different type of heartbreak she felt for him. 

It was something so different and set apart that it was hard to ignore.

It was the same kind of ache she'd only ever read about before but never felt before then.

'In a dream world...you come back,' she mused. ' even if it ends in tragedy, you come back,' she added with a tart touch to her presently sweet smile.

'We'd say goodbye to each other.' She thought while only fantasizing a rather laughable, and overromanticized reenactment of the last novel she'd read.

‘You’d look at me, and you’d tell me how much you’ve missed me. And I’d tell you how much I don’t care...

Because you’re there with me now.

And that’s all that matters.

You’d touch me, and it’d be the first embrace we have...and the last thing I remember before I know what lays beyond. 

She then scoffed, the small sound accompanied by a playful eye-roll that was coupled with a slow, bemused shake of her head.

'- like that would ever happen,' She finally added. 'You're busy...and I'm here.'

By then it'd been a total of six days of continuous rainfall that had not deterred by much. 

Small, open windows of sunshine lasted for only a few minutes before the unkind showers continued, and as she realized that there wasn't even enough time to take a grateful breath during the interludes, she stopped waiting to be graced by the touch of warm rays.

She stopped trying to venture outside, and it had been then that she wondered if her visiting guest would become a permanent habitant because for some reason the thought of him also dying hadn’t really dawned onto her.

"And here I was thinking I'd die alone," she dryly muttered, the words leaving her before she could truly process what she was saying. 

It was rather morbid to say given the situation, because the matter at hand was that, they could very well die. It was the grim reality. 

For a fraction of a second, she expressed worry through a grimace as she registered her own words that were supposed to be more thoughts than anything.

"Here’s to that," Higgs said so with a huff, and while his head was more tilted down, looking over what was an old, torn novel before him, it was at the perfect incline to still meet her gaze.

As (e/c) colored eyes fell over his, she found amusement dancing in the blue orbs, giving her reason to smile again. 

Calming, she was done away with most of her worry as it was replaced by something more innocent.

Embarrassment perhaps, an aftermath of not only her silly ramblings but the look he gave her, more specifically the playful chiding that came from them.

‘You know that was bad right?’ he silently questioned her. 

‘Bad...but funny.’

- At least that’s what she understood.

She felt like she understood him, and he, in turn, did the same for her.

She hardly ever needed to explain things to him, because somehow, he just understood.

Darkness enveloped her home from the outside, but within the safety of the little, underground enclosure there was a graceful light that overpowered the dismay that existed for miles.

All the while, throughout every day that he spent with her, he retained a true, content smile, one that rarely ever faltered. 

Every so often Bridges became a passing topic, and even then he managed to stay rather content. 

Because it wasn't Bridges that watched her face morph from enjoyment to sadness. Then, as the sadness settled in, it wasn't Bridges that managed to make her smile after that.

- Higgs was. 

He was there, and he wasn’t leaving without her.

As they sat together throughout the evening that ultimately turned into night, a sweet smile was on his face as he listened to her speak, enjoying the pleasing sound of her voice as she made conversation with him.

He'd only halfheartedly stared down at the printed words before him as a pastime before eventually, his hand gently moved to shut it, moving it aside as he looked at her, not at all bothered to give her all of his attention.

She'd started with the little sarcastic statement that somehow lead in to an actual conversation. 

Somehow, there was always something to talk about, and while silence was always rather peaceful to him, there was something about the sound of her voice that made him feel calm.

It made him feel happy as well.

The entire time he'd sat there and breezed through the boring book, he wondered if she'd save him from its clutches and just talk to him, truly bringing him out with a talk that would give him a reason to keep his eyes on her.

And eventually, it happened, and he’d been overjoyed, silently overjoyed because he couldn’t tell her how much he loved her. 

Not yet, at least.

She was enthusiastic to keep chatting, and he wouldn't dream of putting an end to the chat, even if, for the most part, it was one-sided.

'the more you tell me,' he started, all while walking past her, feeling so much at home, that he didn't ask where most things were, or if he could help himself to anything.

Part of it was just him marking his territory, and the other being that she truly didn't seem to mind, going as far as to encourage him to take what he needed, do what he wanted, and walk as though this were his own home. 

The only limits he had were her bedroom, but of course, that was understandable. 

As much as he wanted to visit her throughout the night, watch her, touch her and simply breathe the same air she did, he waited for the next day. 

He was compliant.

- Respectful.

He was, what he felt she deserved.

 'the more you keep going,' he went on as, unwillingly, a soft sigh of happiness left him, 

'- The more I fall,' he thought with certainty.

'The more I'm here...' he then added, 'The more I understand you, and the more you become mine.'

'Have you told him half the things you tell me?' he asked himself, liking the idea that even if Sam had gotten the opportunity to be in her presence more, Higgs could go even closer.

He’d dug deeper.

His chest felt warm as throughout all the while that, that thought had occurred, his heart encouraged the musing, 

'  She's not like this with him.'

‘- I know her more.’

He wanted to touch her, even if it was just his arm grazing hers, he wanted some form of contact to go along with the feelings that festered within him. 

But with a soft sigh, smiled instead.

He hummed in response to her, just to let her know he was listening to her and paying attention, all as he took the liberty to pour her a drink.

 A sweet, aromatic waft of air traveled to him as he poured the tea, and he couldn't help but halfheartedly glare down at the drink with traces of guilt.

Guilt, that felt like an infectious negative eating him from within, spreading wildly.

Everything was going well, so swimmingly, it was astonishing. Everything was in his favor, and yet, somehow, there was just a touch of shame that he swallowed down as he prepared her serving.

' I came here...to do this,' he thought to himself, knowing that eventually, the little world they shared had to crumble.

Eventually, they had to face reality.

"I need you to go there," the young, blonde-haired woman said as she informed him of the location, one he recognized quickly, and he felt something knot up his stomach.

Actual bile threatened to rise from his stomach, and as a result, his mouth was shut tight, lips pressed together firmly.

With the same wretched expression of sorrow that created a mask of false innocence she always wore, the blonde-haired woman looked over at him, 

"I want her out of the way," She said lowly, finalizing her decision, and it was only then that he looked up at her, his gaze narrowed.

In her own world, she didn’t feel the hot sear of his gaze, or the sharpness of the blades he shot at her.

"-If you have to create a void out and take everything along, then do so," she ordered.

Her words were spoken in the same manner as always, always having a touch of plea in them even while she made commands to him, as though somehow, she were the true victim.

- As though she had true, justification.

The golden mask he wore was placed perfectly over his face, and if she could see his eyes, she'd know that the little playful tone he spoke with was just as a façade as she, in her entirety was,

"An entire void out?" he mused, "What? Are you Afraid of a little girl in the middle of nowhere?" He mused aloud, the statement making Amelie's mouth turn down as she swallowed down bitter spit.

She looked as though she’d tasted something inhumanly sour with how quickly and viscously her features had twisted.

In her heated state, Amelie didn't question why his voice had been so low, nor how, there was even the slightest sense of knowing in regards to the targeted individual.

Instead, in all her ignorance, she turned from him, looking over to the waters of the beach, glaring at it and hiding the storm that brewed in her own eyes as she bitterly scowled.

"-It's because of her," she then said sharply, nearly hissing. "He goes to her at every moment he can!" she added.

“...And the way he talks about her,” she said while spinning back to face Higgs, her eyes on the verge of tears.

'He..?' the man thought with confusion at first. 

"During every moment I see him, she's there, like a ghost I can never see but have to hear about!" she exclaimed, pain evident. " He mentions her like she's this existing being that's not of this world...like she's the only thing that matters to him," she added, and it clicked. 

It all clicked. 

(F/n). 

His (f/n), the one that was far from all the other shit and wretchedness, was the same person Amelie would occasionally maunder over, never addressing her or truly mentioning her, but having enough spite to grumble over and vent as Higgs halfheartedly paid attention.

(f/n) was the same person Sam had met and couldn't stop visiting.

- The same one he seems to act strange and bashful over when she's brought up.

- The same one that Amelie would listen on about with concern that had spiked into spite when Bridges admitted that when his mind wanders, he thinks of her. Much more that he hopes that somehow, a dream would manifest, something to replace the nightmares he has.

Amelie was jealous because before (f/n), she'd been Sam's comfort. 

She'd been the only reason he had until he found (f/n).

" Is this about that little errand you sent him to do... 

Or about keeping him all to yourself?" Higgs asked suddenly, already knowing that even if both would be true, it was envy that fueled it most, all by the way he watched her stiffen. 

"If she's gone," he started, feeling his heart suddenly ache as he said so, and he had to take a long inhale to continue, "You'll be his only reason he has," he said knowingly. 

"Just make her go away..." Amelie pleaded, her voice terribly soft.

During then, something in (f/n) clicked, and her face became startled with sudden surprise while a sharp gasp left her, 

“Oh!" She then peeped, a quick realization falling upon her, and making her abruptly stop. 

The reaction affected him as well, the impulsive sound startling him. 

Quickly looking over his shoulder, he caught her horrified expression, his own eyes wide as he froze. 

 "I’m so sorry!" she suddenly exclaimed, the apologetic cry calming him just a bit because he realized that it wasn't that she'd somehow figured out who he was, or suspected any treachery from him. 

Instead, her outburst was something that came from a rather endearing, and considerate mindset.

 "I'm so sorry," she said again, the second time nearly grimacing, "I didn’t mean to keep you up!” She then said while offering him a sheepish smile, not even noticing how ridged he'd been or how much relief washed over him afterward.

She then seemed to deflate, as slowly, the enthusiasm she'd been speaking to him with began to die out, leaving him with just the soft sounds of her quieting, nervous chuckles.

'Are you kidding me?' he wondered with amusement, ‘I just love listening to you...’ he mused, shaking his head while he held back a chuckle of his own.  

"Don't apologize," he told her, truly feeling that he didn't have a right to one. 

“But I- “

"No, No," he then insisted, playing off the sternness that had been weaved in his words at first, stopping whatever argument she had as well.

 " I'm having fun!" He assured her, dismissively waving his hand to try and convince her that he was being sincere and not just polite.

“I’d rather stay awake with you than be alone with my thoughts all night,” he argued, the words holding just a touch of bitterness.

 "So come on, and I'm warning you, If you don't keep talking, then I will," he cautioned her, forcing a chuckle from her. "And my stories aren't as sweet as yours," he promise her, and he was being entirely truthful. 

There was hardly anything soft about him, except, perhaps her.

"- And I don't mind," she said without hesitance, and he softly nibbled on his tongue, because he had the urge to tell her everything.

Foolishly, he wanted to just spill everything to her.

'Would you understand?' he thought to himself, reasoning he already knew the answer, but just hoped for that off-chance as impossible as it could be.

'If you knew how many times I'd cornered him like a damn rat...

If you knew that I'm the very thing you pray against...' he then added, knowing how much she worried over the other man.

‘Would you forgive me?’ he wondered. ‘Or would you forget this part of me exists? Would you just see me in the way he’s probably already told you to see me?’

He was silent, far too contemplative to notice she waited for him to speak and tell her the very stories she'd find dreadful.

She could see how pensive he became, as well as how much his expression had darkened, and after a thoughtful hum, she slowly took the reigns again, 

"Ah...You know," (f/n) then started, not at all confident in her words as they stumbled out, "I don't mind a lil drizzle," she admitted, offering him a lukewarm smile as she told him. 

She'd tried to think of something quick to distract him from whatever it was that turned his mood, and that was the first thing that came out.

She reasoned that he had a visiting, bitter thought and wasn’t quite ready to share yet. 

As a kindness, she thought she should draw him back to her instead. 

He needed a distraction, and she did her best.

so far he'd made it clear he didn't mind if she spoke, and he seemed to have something in mind, something grave she wanted to pull him back from.

" It might sound like I hate it with how much I complain, " she started, and before she continued, he scoffed, suddenly snapping out of his daze.

"You? complaining?" he asked her with mock disbelief. " No....not you," he added, well aware of how much she complained about the continuous showers. 

Rolling her eyes, she continued, "Anyways, I complain about the storm we have now, but to be truthful, sometimes, I look forward to a little bit of rain," she then said while playing with the doily that decorated the round table, idly hooking her fingers onto it with no real reason but to mess with it.

"It isn't that I despise the rain itself...because I don't..." she confessed to him.

"Soft showers are lovely," she said softly. "They're relaxing, almost sedative at times." 

"I don't hate the rain...but lately..." she murmured with a little sigh, "Lately, it’s been too much, and I haven’t been able to sleep.” She told him. 

"My problem is that it hardly ever stops," she said while closing her eyes tightly.“ It’s been making me really anxious,” She revealed. 

"It's been making me feel really uneasy, and when I feel like that, I just toss and turn if I try and go to bed.

So, I don't even bother to try and rest," she went on. “And even when I do...I feel tired still,” she explained.

“I guess that’s why I'm still out here, ” she said so as a self-realization.

"It feels like walls are caving in on me, and I have to find something to blame so I can just... just keep going. 

I try to distract myself though. You know, doing little things to try and get my mind off of..." (f/n) then trailed off, her lips pursed together as she hummed. 

"... everything," she added, having an entire catalog of things that left a bitter taste at the mention.

“I’m so tired and sleep can’t fix it. I don't know if you feel that way too sometimes," she added.

"- So frustrated and tired," she elaborated. “I wonder if my silly ramblings make any sense,” she then said.

During then, he gazed down at her serving of tea, blankly staring down at it as he took in her grievances.

"- Sometimes," he admitted, not telling her that the truth was that it was every day.

The nightmares that tormented him made sleep nearly impossible. 

He either woke up in between thick sobs or stayed awake until his eyes burned and there was hardly ever an in-between.

Lately, however, he’d had the luck of living through the ‘Hardly ever,’ moments.

Being around her felt …nice.

"I get nightmares frequently," he revealed to her, "So sleep isn't an escape for me like it is for everyone else," he informed her.

“It’s never really been an escape for me,” he added with a grimace.

 "Being a porter... I was...I am away a lot. Most of the time I'm alone." he said while a touch of remembrance graced him as he thought back to the innocence he used to have.

he thinks back to the sadness that floods him and has stayed.

He thinks of all of his failures and how no matter what he did, death was at the end.

"I don't have to bother anyone that way. That’s the good thing about being alone," he mused the thought aloud, knowing he had trailed off the point he was trying to make, if there had been any to begin with.

“Anyways,” he muttered, all while continuing to gaze down at her serving, eyeing the blend with an expression that held a halfhearted glare, 

"I've got something for us here, " he said before slowly turning back to her. “It should hit the spot,” he said while gently placing the mug before her.  

"- Extra sweet..." Higgs informed her, his smile sincere as he mirrored her gentle expression.

' - just like you,' he inwardly mused, '...just for you,’ he thought while slipping the little flask back into his pocket as he took his seat across from her. 

" Higgs ?" she then breathed as her hand touched the handle, the downhearted expression she wore stilling him because there was nothing in between them. 

It was just him and her, truly bared, yet another layer stripped.

 "Do you ever feel like...like you don't want to be here?" she wondered, seeming ashamed at asking such a thing. "like...you don't want to be anywhere?" she asked him, and his surprised expression that quickly turned soft gave her a strange sense of comfort. 

He didn't judge her for such an inquiry, nor did he look at her with pity.

Instead, it was like he was looking at her with understanding, and all without a single word, he made her feel normal, accepted.

" Yeah," he then breathed, sounding tired as he answered her. 

"But right now...I like being here," he admitted to her, meaning it.

He watched as her eyes shinned, beyond the wetness that had suddenly welled within them, there was a happy, little twinkle in the (e/c) colored eyes. 

There was a short silence in between them one that lasted only a few seconds short of a minute before she spoke again,

"-I like that you're here," she said back, a little quiver to her voice she then masked with a soft chuckle.

' I like having someone around.

I like not feeling lonely.

I like knowing I'm listened to.

I like knowing you're here.

I like you.' 

'you deserve sleep,' he thought with falling shoulders, ' You deserve so much more than this,' he added while watching as she drank down the warm drink with such an appreciation and trust that it twitched at his heart.

she didn't think twice about it, and if she had it was only because of the temperature of the beverage that forced her to go slow.

During then, he released a soft exhale through his nose,

' It'll be alright,' he thought with guilt as he continued to watch her indulge in the rest of the helping with not a single bit of hesitance or shred of doubt.

He could reason that perhaps she was distracted by their conversation, or maybe it was the soft vulnerability that she had for that moment itself, but truly, he knew that it was simply her naiveté that let him take advantage. 

It's the very thing that let him into her home.

'You know the world is shit, but you don't let it rot you, ' he thought with admiration. ‘ You’re not stupid...you’re just too sweet.’

'You feel so alone, and you could try to find an escape. But instead, you just keep going.

You force yourself to keep going because you know deep in your heart, there's something there.

 Even when you’re close to your end, you feel there’s just one thing there.

And you let it give you reason.

And somehow, you stay sweet. 

You stay hopeful. 

Even when you've got misery flashing in your pretty eyes, you're not letting it get the best of you,' he thought with pride.

'Even when your suffering, even after sobbing out your entire heart...you manage to smile,' he added with the same awe. 

'You bounce back, and you glow just as gracefully. 

You continue to find beauty in this filth.

You manage to do something, that until I'd met you felt impossible.' 

Higgs's soft-toned blue's watched the young woman as, steadily, her demeanor shifted.

The lovely radiance of her (e/c) colored eyes slowly dimmed, and at that, the kind smile he offered her became firm, his two lips pressed together until they seemed thin.

her left hand balled before it pressed over her left eye, and her other joined in-suite, her right hand giving the respective eye the same treatment.

A yawn forced its way out of her, the airy sigh sounding terribly sweet before it was suppressed by her cupped hands.

"That's some good tea," (f/n) chimed before another long sigh escaped her, forcing little tears to well in her hazing eyes.

She began to slump, and gradually, she leaned forward, inching closer to the surface with incoherent murmurs as she tried to stay up.

"Higgs..?" she whispered in a soft moan as she watched his blurry figure approach her.

As he moved from the other end of the round table his index and middle finger slid over the surface, slowly trailing until they found contact with the vulnerable beauty.

"Shhhh..." the hushing noise that arose from him was tender, but not as gentle as the touch he graced her with. 

Delicately, his hand caressed her (h/c) colored hair while his eyes stayed attentive to her lovely face and its serene expression as she lived through the last bit of resistance she had against the exhaustion.

She hummed in response to the touch, slowly blinking until she could hardly keep her eyes open.

"I'm happy you're here..." she said beneath her breath, still not understanding what was happening.

Smiling, he responded,

 "Same here sweetheart."

Yet again she murmured his name and something else that he didn't quite catch.

 The same tender hand eased her (light/dark) hair from over the back of her neck as he wore a loving smile.

Slowly, he inched closer, soon nuzzling her nape with a warm murmur of her name being released.

A battered breath left him, fanning over her exposed flesh before he soothed his lips onto the little patch of skin, the press lasting an uninterrupted minute he indulged himself in. 

"I lied," he whispered. "And I'm sorry," he added, and if she could hear his soft apology she’d just know he was being true. 

She’d know that there was true guilt in his voice. 

She’d know that what he did was because he had to.

" I lied sweetheart...I don't like being here. I just like being anywhere you are..." he said with a quirky, little grin.

And for that moment he looked innocent and sweet.

"I'm keeping you safe darling, " he pouted. " From Amelie...From Bridges...From this world."

The blue glow to her cufflinks remained until his hand gripped the end that encircled her wrist. 

His hold was strong enough it shook and it was all that he needed to sever the ties that needed to be destroyed, 

"You don't need Bridges anymore," he said as they were forcibly snapped open, the blaring red that glowed with alarm, landing on the floor.

"I'll tell him for you," he said lowly. "I'll let him know you don't need him. 

I’ll let him understand that you never needed him.

That you just needed to wait for me. 

And here I am." 

If anyone were to see him then, all they would gaze upon is a man that was devoted, a man too far gone to take anything less than what he now had in his hands,

"- I'll tell him you're mine now. 

So You don’t have to worry about any goodbyes.

Because I know how much they break your heart."

Next Part :

[savage-rhi]

Dawkins: A Death Stranding WIP

Summary:

This is a little WIP section of a new Death Stranding fanfic I've been developing based around my OC Gene Dawkins. Some may be familiar with Gene in my fics Sky of Atoms, and Death Stranding Rewind. These stories followed Gene and her relationship with Higgs Monaghan. With this new story, I'm making it more centered on her own life with an overarching plot that ties in with what we know from the game (and possibly DS2 when it comes out). I don't anticipate writing for this story until my other works are complete, but I wanted to put this out for fun and see if there's interest. Feel free to reach out or reply if you want. Thanks for reading!

Gene had never in her life felt this cold before. Her skin trembled while sweat pooled down her face. She felt warm like a fever had taken root. The single blanket provided to her seldom helped, even as she bundled further. Her legs dangled over her assigned coffin, feet gently touching the tiled floor. The piercing cold had her retreat with a hiss. She lifted her right foot up, setting it across her lap, and inspected her sole. There should’ve been frostbite or even a burn given how painful it was. Nonetheless, there was no sign of such a wound much to Gene’s relief. 

��They weren’t kidding about side effects,” Gene murmured to herself with a laugh. Furrowing her brows, she realized it would be a while before she could enjoy being back in the land of the living. Especially when her body or Ha, was registering that her spirit, Ka, returned from the Beach and the five planes. 

Despite having an easy time reintegrating, Gene’s mind was rattled at all she had experienced. The Beach, and all the others connected, were as intricate as stars in a galaxy; boundless. And like stars, beaches shimmered and exploded; returning to the dust from wence they came with new ones coming to take the mantle. 

The BTs were another thing that overwhelmed her. On earth, they were more or less the boogeymen of the modern world; a byproduct of the Death Stranding and its calamity. On the five planes, they had their own ecosystem and life cycle. Gene could scarcely remember it entirely, but when her Ka had walked among them, something clicked. There was a purpose to everything, even monstrous creatures with nuclear capability if they contacted the living. 

“Hey, sleeping beauty!” 

Gene turned her head, seeing Odd standing in the doorway carrying a medium-sized box. 

“Is that you, or my sleep paralysis demon?” Gene quipped with a tired laugh, shaking her head. 

“Would both be a sufficient answer?” Odd chuckled. 

“Depends if you want to get hit in the face or not,” Gene shrugged with a grin. Her eyes followed Odd as he ventured further into the room, and pulled up a stool from afar to sit across from her. 

“How are you feeling?” 

“Like I died,” Gene answered point blank. “Does this happen every time you go Walking?” 

“For a while, yeah. Your Ha will get used to it.” Odd nodded truthfully. He let out a breath he had been holding back since Gene had undergone the ceremony and smiled.

“I knew you’d pull through!”

Gene canted her head, raising a brow in suspicion. 

“What?” Odd asked.

“I swear I hear doubt in your voice.” Gene grinned. 

“Nah, never.” Odd chuckled, waving off the accusation with his hand playfully. “Although, you had me worried back there, on the shores. Most have their breakthrough before ascending to the Beach and five planes.”

“Guess I'm special," Gene murmured, recalling how terrifying that ordeal was. One moment, she was feeling the energy of all atoms in the air and sky, and then a wave of tar crashed into her being and pulled her into the ocean. “I’m glad you and ANUBIS were there to pull me out, or...I guess I should be calling you SET now considering the circumstances.” 

“It’s about time you started treating me with some authority!” Odd chuckled and further laughed at the playful grimace Gene evoked. 

“Don’t get all cute,” Gene countered. “You may be the better Death Walker, but I’m still the best porter between us.” 

“You do have me in a bind there,” Odd admitted with a soft laugh. His expression changed, going from carefree to concerned. He held it for a while, glancing over Gene as if looking for a hidden injury. “I know you already told me, but for clarity's sake, what did you see during your breakthrough?”  

“I can’t remember it all. It was sudden, like a light going on and off.” 

“Try to remember the core of it.” Odd encouraged. “The feelings you had, and any images of significance.” 

Gene made a face, feeling the hairs on her arms stand. She remembered drowning, feeling the very essence of her Ka expanding and contracting before a fury of images was suddenly downloaded into her consciousness. Deep down, she didn’t know if she would ever recover from it.

She closed her eyes, trying to give her brain the chance to sort through what experiences her Ka had taken into itself. 

“I saw the world,” Gene began, and gesticulated with her hands to emphasize her points. “And out of this…void, came a large snake. It coiled around the globe ten times over, squeezing what it could. Then the snake stretched its neck and looked up at the sun. I saw it rise, sprinting toward it. Its mouth opened, and it swallowed the rays and eventually, the whole sphere, but the sun escaped and the snake retreated back into the darkness.” 

Gene opened her eyes when she was done recounting. “Then I saw you and ANUBIS pulling me out of the surf.” 

Odd, nodded. The concern he displayed from before died down as he smiled with pride. His fingers gently tapped the medium-sized box, and he offered it to Gene. 

With a shaking hand, Gene retrieved the box. She raised a brow at Odd after glancing between the package and him.

“What’s this, a funeral gift?”

“More like a welcoming present.” Odd corrected with a laugh. “You survived the ceremony, the breakthrough, and found your patron. It’s only fair you earned one of these to help you travel to and from the Beach.” 

Gene began to unwrap the box, her smile growing big as each layer was peeled back. When her mask was finally revealed, Gene paused to look over the details. It reminded her of a half-face Oni mask that samurai would wear into battle, to scare the souls out of their enemies. The structure was reptilian in nature, resembling the maw of a dragon. The teeth were small, save for a pair of fangs that a cobra would be envious of. The mask was near pitch black, and the teeth were covered in gold chiralium. Though Gene knew this was a tool for her new job, it was also a work of art. Something crafted with devotion.

“Did you make this, or did the UCA?” Gene asked in awe. 

“Yours truly!” Odd gestured out with both his arms and grinned. “Once you told me what your breakthrough was on the Beach, I started carving with the printers as soon as I woke up.” 

As Gene combed over every inch of detail, she noticed a small inscription on the lower left side of the mask. In silver etching was inscribed the numbers 006 with a dash in between, and a name in all caps. She furrowed her brows, then finally peered up at Odd who gave her a beaming smile, much like the ones used to wear all the time when they were both children. 

Odd stood up, rummaging Gene’s hair playfully. In between exhausted laughs, and Gene shoving his arm away, Odd crouched in front of Gene. The determination in his eyes had her smiling back in admiration. 

“I better let you rest. You’re gonna need it before we go Walking again.”

“More like I need to hibernate.” Gene snorted. 

“Then I will speak no more!” Odd chuckled and rose to his feet. He ventured to the door of Gene’s quarters. Before disappearing from view, Odd turned around, meeting Gene’s gaze. 

“Welcome to the DUAT, APEP.” 

With a wink, he was gone and Gene’s eyes fell back onto the mask. Her fingers traced over the word APEP and she swallowed. 

The serpent eating the sun came back to her. Except, the sphere didn’t escape from the clutches of the giant reptile. The planet disappeared into its gaping maw, and then there was darkness, and what could only be described as a supernova and fire following suit. Then came the screams of billions. 

A part of Gene wanted to tell Odd the truth; that there was more to her breakthrough than what was shared. Nonetheless, Gene couldn’t help but feel the need to keep to herself. It could wait until later. She and DUAT had bigger problems; capturing those responsible for destroying Middle Knot City.

She playfully put the mask on her lower face, and breathed in deep while her eyes closed. There would be justice.