#hibby my friend hibby :)

[lamouratorrrrry]

save me white girl

[expatesque]

How do you make new friends in London in your mid-late 20s? Feeling pretty lonely and don’t know where to start!

Oh pal same. London is so hard - when I went to Bermuda it happened so easily and naturally, coming back here has been like a cold shock. But I'm not giving up, I'm taking my Bermuda lessons back with me.

What I'm doing:

- starting with the obvious. Inviting the girl I've always had good chats with to get lunch after tennis drill. Actually properly going to dinner with my secretary. Reconnecting with people from the past who I've fallen out of touch with.

- being more present. Less time with headphones in, more aware of the spaces around me. Hasn't worked yet but who knows, I could meet my next best friend at a bus stop.

- being open. The best thing I learned in Bermuda is that many, many more people can be good friends than just those I would naturally gravitate towards. When options are limited (the entire island is 51k people, and the pool of people around my age without kids was way, way smaller), you're more tolerant and willing to try things out. And I made such a good group of friends out there, with people who I probably wouldn't have said more than two sentences to in London.

- saying yes. To all kinds of things. Another Bermuda lesson: getting out of your comfort zone is a good thing, and it's easy to make fast friends when everyone feels silly.

- making the first move. Anti-British to talk to strangers, I know but I'm not British so fuck that. Compliment that girls earrings, make a joke about how long the line is to the gal next to you in the queue at the bar, ask the cool person at work for coffee. Brits are shy reserved, so if I have to do more work, fine. It's a small price to pay.

- lean on friends of friends. Who has your friend been talking about for years that you haven't met yet? Meet them. Throw a house party and tell people to bring people you don't know. Start telling your friends to bring their friends and colleagues along to drinks. I read this excellent article recently about what life was like before cell phones and man, it sounds pretty good. I'm going to try to establish a standing bar that my friends know I'll be at on a certain night to encourage more unplanned fun.

That's what I've got - anyone else have advice?

+ sleepover saturday

[ryctone]

I just realized I never posted Hibbi's 'new' ref here? That's a crime???

Anyway doomed by the narrative siren my beloved;; more about her under read more with some slightly reworked story for her!

She's a siren now if you haven't noticed or didn't know, can transforms into a land cookie at will(no longer linked to her necklace), is still part of the Cookies of Darkness but not necessarily an official member; she owns D.E a favor... Kinda like Butter Roll Cookie's situation.

Has been alone since she was a guppy because sirens are often solitary creatures and often abandon their offspring as soon as they're able to swim.

As a guppy she managed to travel to the Duskgloom Sea where Black Pearl Found her and sort of adopted her, since B.P knew how powerful a siren could be with their hypnotizing songs, Hibiscus became like a 'henchman' for her to lure ships further into the Duskgloom Sea and sink them more efficiently. Dysfunctional merfolk family/J

As a teen she meets Praline Cookie, a girl part of a hunter monster organization and daughter of the head of that order, she got a crush on her for the longest time and actually became friends, but the moment she confessed it put a rift in their relationship since Praline was in love with someone else (Raspberry Mousse Cookie, who btw didn't return Praline's feelings) causing them to separate ways for many years.

After some years pass Hibiscus abandons Black Pearl to live her own life and would have a child; Sorbet Shark Cookie(who's part mermaid, don't ask who the other parent is that's not important /LH), since they were the only thing she had she decided to fight her instincts and raise them for as long as she could, best mom really.

However after going out of her nest to get food one day, she's captured by pirates and forced away from her child for days. And when she finally escapes, blood on her sharp teeth, she comes back to a destroyed nest, her child is just gone.

She's spirals into a manic state trying to search for her child, not finding them anywhere, telling herself they had to be alive. It came to the point where she ended up washed up to land, starving and alone... Until she's found by Dark Enchantress...

Bonuses facts:

Has a pet named Minty-pus, a salt rock octopus that has stayed by her side for a long time, good for emotional support.

'Hunted' by Praline Cookie as Hibiscus was marked as a 'monster' by the Praline Order Praline Cookie is part of.

Sort of sarcastic with those who annoy her.

Very protective towards Poison Mushroom and acts as a sort of mother figure to them, probably because she remains them to her own missing child.

She's now a popular singer, her songs can absorb the love from a cookie if she wants and store it in her necklace, transforming into magic power.

Sorbet Shark was very young went they went missing and doesn't remember Hibiscus at all.

Still has a crush on Praline and will 'jokingly' flirt with her went they have an encounter with each other.

Actually very scared of D.E.

If she was in canon maybe she meets Gingerbrave and co. at the beginning of the story trying to block their way like the other Cookies of Darkness by seducing hypnotizing Chili Pepper with her song and make her fight for her.

She's conflicted about serving the Enchantress but thinks it's the right way to find her child, and has developed a bit of a selfish personality.

[acsy]

Idk whether it's because I'm attracted to men or if there's gen a problem with hsr women, but so far all my favorite characters are males and idk this just feels odd.

Like so far all the unhinged female characters have some elements that just ick me a bit and thus unable to like them (sparkle), or they're genuinely interesting characters but they're just so...passive (Ruan mei), or they're like so fanservicie in a "mommy" way which like, i don't mind but i don't like (kafka), or I just don't like them straight up.

Like I guess some close seconds are Stelle and Herta but that's it, and since we only have doll herta so far I'm not THAT invested yet (waiting for 5 star herta).

They have so many cool female characters, but none of them are to my taste, I like unhinged women with sass and the only one who does that without that "ooo mommy step on me" voice or attitude is Herta, like please I was kinda looking forward to jade but her demeanor is so... idk, I liked her concept, her lines and behavior I find interesting too, but the way she plays them and her design? Just tick me off. Same for sparkle she seemed so fun until she wasn't, she kinda just fell flat on her face after giving out the buttons and became irrelevant, idk I like Sampo because despite being unhinged in a funny kinda crooked businessy man way, he still is pretty tame compared to the rest of the masked fools and I'm curious about his past. Sparkle kinda just feels like they wanted to make a character with glamorized schizophrenia without giving her schizophrenia, and then just over played her role at the Start before forgetting her.

Sunday is a very interesting character, ratio too, they both have this overlap between behavior, belief and ideal in different ways and I like that, they have depth beyond surface level behavior. But most female characters just give everything away as they speak to you, you don't find out more and go "wooow" like I did when I found out about boothill's backstory, and even when they expose everything in the story like for Sunday it was "show don't tell", we got flashbacks, a fight scene, some dope monologues, tension building. And idk, I suppose I'm just picky.

Argentie is just funny tbh, head empty just beauty, but with the recent reveal of his backstory and the friend monster ordeal, he's starting to grow on me, especially because of how enigmatic the knights of beauty are we only met one and when he did he was rizzing up a plant before diving into nihility to pop out a few people like it was nothing.

I want a woman who seems just as simple minded as Argentie, no thoughts just Idrilla, but without any mommy or eeby hibbie uwu quiet vibes I'm so sick of cool women having such lackluster speech and behavior.

Give me unhinged herta, just more herta lore I'm starving.

Topaz is probably the closest to my fav type of character but she isn't unhinged enough :(

[demi-romantics]

Hello there, idk if you've been asked this question before but how would you describe being Demi romantic? Like I'm super confused about that. at first it didn't bother me but then I started feeling weird towards one of my close friends. Previously I identified as aro but I'm so sure anymore, can you please help me?

Being demiromantic essentially means that you do not experience romantic attraction until you form a close emotional bond with somebody. Once such bond exists, it’s possible for a demiromantic person to experience romantic attraction but it does not automatically happen. From there on, it’s up to chance just like for any other person.

I of course don’t know what kind of emotions you are feeling towards your friend. They could be strong platonic feelings (wanting to be around them, wanting their attention, wanting to make sure they are happy) or could also be romantic feelings (wanting to be close to them, possibly want to hold hands or cuddle, possibly feeling nervous around them/around the thought of holding hands). The complicated part is that strong romantic and platonic feelings can be very similar to each other.

To try and figure out if I have a squish (friend crush) or crush (romantic crush) on somebody I generally try to imagine myself doing romantic things with that person (how would I feel if I would kiss them, cuddle them, etc) and if it gives me the hibbie jibbies I usually can be sure that it isn’t romantic attraction.

I hope this helps! Feel free to ask follow up questions if I wasn’t clear enough!

[thereal-danysaur]

MY FRIEND’S FROP OC‼️

They made a new one so Hibby (the frop above) is getting replaced

@sgrbwni

[daintydoilypon]

Do you fear anything, mod?

I've kinda lived through my worst fear several times, which is the death of family or friends. I have had 14+ people pass away. You can kinda let go of grandparents, that's to be expected, but 11 of those were my friends/classmates/friend's siblings.

Otherwise, I do have the fear of throwing up and my teeth falling out, gives me the hibbie-jibbies.

[in-this-light-on-this-evening]

Alright, now that we know I’m planning a trip to Wales, I have a fucking concern because I just realised I will have to rent an RHD car and that, my friends, is giving me the hibbie-jibbies.

How does one drive that thing while being used to only LHD cars?!

[doyouthinkimenjoyingthis]

Sept 19, 2015

My mom's mission when I was in elementary was to find me friends. She would enroll me in academies, befriend mother who has the same kids same age as mine. She'd encourage me to go to Sunday schools and is actually a cult and the church leader Apollo Quiboloy is a shady, trafficking guy. Didn't meet the guy but my friend Frances Jean and her family watches the channel. I couldn't stand even 10 minutes of the program. I am catholic and I like the whole sacramental processes of the mass. The Sunday school went on only for a year. It was fun it wasn't like we are indoctrinated to do some religious shit it's just normal catholic shit. But we weren't allowed to carry a rosary. I have a rosary with me which was a gift that I've gotten from a nun when I was christened at 6.

LIn the morning, there's a morning mass. The kids are separate as not to disturb the adults. All the adults are inside this hall in Lucban Elementary School. They don't come out until five. While we kids, we have all the fun. The rides are free so mom didn't bother driving or dropping me off.

My friend Frances and I have this closer relationship. She has a unique condition. For her age, she has white hair. I just searched about it and it's Vitiligo according to google. Didn't read much. She was bullied for it off course and being called a grandma but I guess she wasn't bothered anymore by it or she just got used to it. Because she seems really strong or resilient. I'm a sensitive child, I wouldnt last that.

Anyway, in this church, I've known kids who have very troubled childhood like we only discuss those in abnormal psychology kind of troubled. One of them, I went to school with her younger brother.

She told us her story about how she is abused by her father.

DSWD has taken actions already but I felt weird about that because I don't refute it's true. Sometimes I can't help compare myself to that girl. We all live in the same neighborhood, we just live a little bit above. And when I come out of my house, I look at every person living their lif , acting nicely, smiling--unknown to me thy have nasty little sins. Unforgivable. Inhumane.

And you know whats the funniest part is itcan be someone closer to me. The worst part is you could have stopped it. You actually have the right tools and connections to do so but you can't because you didn't know enough.

Frances lives in the same neighborhood as me. Yes in a subdivision too but not all subdivision are bougie. Frances and her family of 5 children, her mom works in a government agency Department of Something-- a professional but like she gets pregnant every year. The father not sure he seems normal. But he was kinda funny weird especially during my glow and grow as a teen.

All men except my father and brother in laws are funny weird to me while growing. I know why and it's giving me hibby jibbies .

I've been hanging out with them since I was a kid. But they all live in this one bedroom apartment basement in the in law's building. I didn't think of it as weird back then. I didn't think I was lucky that I got my own room and that my parents are very particular about personal space and privacy.

It has no windows. My dad didn't want me hanging out with them because he doesn't want me to pick up "squatter habits" as he points out. I don't think he's being matapobre but what he meant is he doesn't want me to pick habits that they have like imagine being in the slums-- noisy and stuff, swearing and fighting, drugs, alcohol.

Frances would tell me things that would hint that something is wrong in the family.

Living in a one bedroom apartment is already one of them. I told you about my father's job and he says that small houses am with no privacy encourages child abuse.

I still sleep beside my parents up until I was 5. I had my own room but when Roxanne and Ronaliza was adopted I shared the room with all fourofnus. As family especially stormy seasons, we still like to sleep in one bed, sharing body heat and scary stories. But we all have our rooms. I had to share mine with Roxy and Ronnie when my sister Sally movrd out because dad says she's already 16 and needs her own privacy. The three of us 9 year olds are stuck in a bunk bed and one bed.

I mean what sthe point of that segue as that I can't imagine being that many in that four walls that is too small. Our room is even bigger than that. I mean we do that we sleep altogether occasionally I just can't imagine me being in her situation.

We have a big house with the rest rooms. My parents have their own bathroom.

We have a wide space so we don't get to look at each other the whole time. Imagine being that many and wherever you go whatever you do you you will see them in every angle tests sick

One time Frances told me that her mother was so angry that she made her sleep outside. It was February. She slept in a 5 inch wide bench just enough to accommodate her very thin body.

It was a punishment.

One time when I was 13, I slept outside to punish my parents. Make them feel guilty.

I would see these purple marks around her neck and wrists but she would hide it.

I shared food with her because she wasn't fed. She has no lunch and her lunch money was 20 pesos which wasn't going to buy a decent one.

So I tell my mom to put more and my mother is more than happy too. Until she learned about it because the teacher said that I'm very nice girl because I share my lunch.

Mom was mad and told the kid directly notto ask food from me and thinks Frances is using me.

She made her under the list of friends I am bit allowed t hangout with. So she enrolled me in a judo class Soni won't go to Sunday school.

I remained friends with Frances against my mother's wish which is funnily against her wish to because she wanted me to be friends with her in the first place since we are neighbors, goes to the same school, loves cartoons and books, and that her grandma is a doctor. Frances grandma is also our kagawad and we often come along for the campaigns.

So anyway, until we were in Grade 5, I still hear about this mini abuses of her mother. By that time we've got our menses. I had mine in January 2006 and she got hears before we started Grade 5.

I would hear how his father is weirdly affectionate of her. But I've never thought of it as something bad which afain--irony.

By Grade 6 I had other friends-- the kind of friends my mother wanted for me. Come from a nice family, middle to upper class, high achievers and plays ay least one musical instrument.

W ehave kind of separated but we hangout when watching anime together at 5:00.

By the end of our elementary, she was given money and pleaded me t hang out before we separate schools. I didn't want to because her life is so tragic and i dont want to hear anymore of the abuses or grooming she is getting from her parents.

So we went out chaperoned by her creepy dad to the cinema and watched a very traumatic movie Bridge to Tabitha. Then had some buttered chicken after.

She has gone into special sports program IN city high Andi went into special sciences in UB. I was friends with Jimmy then, and she couldn't understand why I'm friends with her.

I'm friends with the people my mother dislikes. And I'm enemies with people my mother likes and I had to endure.

Maybe I really am a trashy person. I'm not supposed to be well adjusted Buti know now the reason why. I'm queer and I'm into different and more interesting people.

So anyway we were talking the three of us while I learn how to sortmy laundry in our laundry space upstairs.

Frances is helping me how because I don't know how to do laundry.

She said she's going to her aunt and she's going to Davao to serve Christ.

I know that Frances has once dreamed being a nun. She was just like me who has the kind of devoton to God except that I am abit skewed and she's not.

Whenever reproductive system comes up, she tells us that she'll enter the sisterhood not the kind of sisterhood in travelling pants.

Our science teacher would point out that girls would say that off course due to fear of sex, pregnancy and childbirth. On a side note, she claims that we are just saying that now that most of us will be mothers.

Just one of us will become a mother superior.

But in Christian sectz, there's no vocation such as being a priest and a nun.

I was confused and it's not even a real church. Because Apollo Quiboloy is a big fatliar I know.

Because my soeciall talent is sniffing bullshit.

So it was our goodbye.

"Paano volleyball mo?"

I asked

She said she'll still fo volleyball.

I've learned years later the truth from a neighbor, DVD auntie (because she hoards DVDs and we borrow from her) about what is happening

It devastated me because she's been telling me but i didn't help her. At first I didn't know why I was so angry hut I realized it's because of that.

I think that these has just been stories to me just like how my father's cases ee just cases. They are just stories. It's like you cant feel sorry for a movie because it's not real.

And I theorize that swhy bad things happen a lot and worse it gets normalized because good people doesn't do anything.

After Frances left with no contact whatsoever, I moved to different schools. I encounter many of these shocking stories that people are supposed to be in jail for.

But you know when you get thisnkun of stories you don't think about going to the police station to report it. You listen and thinks having this secret or knowingsomethign illegal is cool.

So I stay away and notform attachments so I don't need to know.

Should I have reported it or done something. I have no power or energy.

I stepped into the City High and the students' stories are heartbreaking. The you hear more stories involving even adults who are supposed to protect you because we still are children and are powerless. So when a friend told me this story about her cousin involved with an elderly teacher we were both about to puke. But did we do anything? No. We just stood there in disgust and gossip. At least she didn't laugh about it because I neighborhoods thats what I hear they will year you down spread gossip but won't do anything about it.

But we didn't. We talked about it at night (she was my nanny) and express disgust. Because,the man is 50 something and we sorta mock and imagine the kind of sex they are having. Like imagine fucking a grandpa.

It's awful and disgusting. My mom if you know that Tv5 program SE likeswatching it because of this unbelievable drama that are so trashy squatter like and happens to most Filipinos. She sees the struggle of others as entertainment. Lives of Filipinos are really juicy. And gossip is one real serotonin trigger.

But what Ive learned from my friend Frances shit happens to everyone.

Evil things happens not only in certain communities, classes, educational or socio cononomicak backgrounds. It can happen to the closest ones.

I've closed my doors to any other human attachments and that was a tme I struggle with faith. I stopped being friends with these bougie friends.

I remained a few I share interests with but not too close. It's almost out of duty.

And speaking of Faith that how things changed for me.

Another person to the list my mom don't want me to be friends with.

When I grew out going to academies, dad starts bringing me sports clubs like tennis, golf and squash to enhance my physiquenand social skills but it's actually where you can find a suitable boyfriend and potential rich husband. Someone's who's already rich.

My mother said "never marry for potential."

I believed her. All my sister's did believe that and that's why they delayed dating until they are established and went from dating to marry and snagged decent husbands. Five of my sister's married youngmen actually so it's not applicable.

Julie married her own student. That's classic grooming.

Now I'm going to exit for a while-- I used to go to this DEPED school near our house because most of my friends in the neighborhood go there.

But in just a year of staying there, many shit happened. Child abuses, drama, suicide, spirit possessions and mean teachers. So my mom was horrified and found a nicer school.

Yes just a year. I also entered a local quiz completion hosted by RPn. Can't remember anyway.

She stopped setting me up with friend when I was 13. She realized I'm having my own personality and that I will choose my own friends noatter how she hates it. She was healing from surgery.

Jimmy was my only friend and Eunice.

We spend time watching DVDs and singing and dancing to Britney Spears. Their moms are cool. My mom wasn't and doesnt like it but it's what I wanted.

When I transferred to City High when I was 14, I cried because my friend is going back t Manila. A really good friend turned out she's my crush.

She gave me money so I can join in the goodbye party.

She doesn't get angry when I'm drunk. But she breathes in and out. She knew I was having problem with my faith and she's really worried about me going the bad wayn

I continue to have bad friends bit it barely turned me bad.

I told you-- I'm more of an observer. A voyeur. It's like watching Tv.

My mom since then met all my friends even those from the church service off course and she was glad that I'm in touch with spirituality.

And Constant is there but then he died.

My mother told me that life is an elevator. Whether you go down or up, people leave.

I never thought it has affected me. Because the following years creating new bonds became really different.

It's like I cant anymore.

When I turned in college since I'm not a cool girl, I asked my mother a lot of money for books and a laptop. That's all I've been doing. No friendships except for Hollmae and a few.

She met them and is satisfied that's found my own tribe. I think my mom is a successful parent through med. S e made me trust her. She made me be the rgin anymore. And when I told her whom I lost it, she's not even half surprised. She got hurt off course but she accepted it.

Parents usually look at their kids as still their little angel who is innocent and they think they can't do antyhing that seems bad.

Mom never looked at me as if I don't deserve to be treated like a baby anymore.

Nothing d

[alba8688]

Chapter 18

Word count:4807

Warnings :18plus minors DNI

Eddie pov

You would have thought because I was in New York on vacation with my girlfriend.I wasn't going to Be in school but right there I was wrong she still managed for me to do school being miles away .

What can I expect when my girlfriend is a teacher ..

Saying it  like that gives me the Hibbie jeebies.

So, She even had uncle Wayne call the school for me to have online classes while I was over here.

Supposably saying  I was sick.

but I was ok with that for sure it meant I didn't have to set foot in that hell hole we call school.I mean I can be at home while still at school. That is so awesome .But still not cool at all.

"Dani!!!"I whine while waiting for my English teacher to send me the work I am supposed To do.

"Eddiieee!!" She mímick me ,she was sitting next to me, sending the substitute the work for the day .

"Baby I want to cuddle ." I pouted

"That's not metal for you Munson." She looked at me and smiled, "but I could cuddle ."

"Yeah ?" She got me all excited ,I was about to turn off the computer when she stopped me .

"We can cuddle when you're done with your work ."

"You wound me Sweetheart ." I fell back to the couch like I fainted .

"Stop being such a drama queen, Edward ." She told me and got up, closing her laptop and left me alone to die of boredness .She left me alone to my misery .I should die this morning .

———————-

Liam stopped by today with great news telling us  that his mother agreed for them to see Nathan while We were staying here in New York. She agreed to every weekend of this month .I don't know how he did it .

Maybe he sold his soul to her but whatever he did it worked .

She even let him stay the night as well and now Dani and Liam were Happier than ever and I was happy for them too .

But Somehow I felt there was something evil behind that lady being too nice and I hope I wasn't wrong but still ,today I would be calling Robin to talk to her dad .

I know he could help us .Because he has help me and uncle Wayne especially when uncle Wayne had to get custody of me when I was younger .

Before I started my next class I decided to call Robin .But first I thought of what I was going to tell her .Without revealing our little secret .

After I had practiced what I was going to say I dial Robin's number .

R:"Hello ."  Robin answered

E:"It's me Eddie ." I said nervously

R:"Of Course it's you Dingus I have your number saved ,what's up ?"she sounded cheerfully as always .

I could hear a bunch of noise in the background and of course she answered her phone during school .

Probably walking to her next class.

E:"Umm I need a favor for a friend ."

R:"ok what's going on ?"

I try my best to explain everything that was going on to Robin with Nathan and she said she would give me a call back when her father got home. I didn't tell her who my friend was because she said that she didn't like getting involved in her dad's business and I was glad for that .Because I didn't have to tell her that it was our history teacher .i hung up the phone and saw that it was almost time for my next class .So I got ready taking out my textbook and whatever else I needed. And when I was done with all this Cuddle time.

Online classes were the easiest thing for me honestly especially because I didn't have to see the faces of Jason and his goons.At first when Dani said that  was going to take online classes I didn't know how I was going to do it because I didn't own a laptop never bought one because I didn't have the money .Dani Offer to buy me one but I decline she already spend so much so I decide to use some of my savings to get me one .

So two days ago Dani and I had gone computer shopping looking for a laptop for me i didn't want nothing fancy just something where I was able to do my work ,but it was hard there was so many types of computer I fell in love with one it was beautiful and the sales person said I could play games on it it was just like Dustin's computer but the one I saw was a laptop it was a gaming laptop but it was way over my budget .But it talked to me and I decided to take it and when it came time for us to pay Dani kept insisting she will pay for it for me but i denied telling her she had already done enough paying for the whole trip plus I told her I had some money save up .

So yes I got myself the gaming computer and I couldn't wait to show Henderson so we can play together online but wait I don't have internet at the trailer ,But Dani has internet in her apartment ..

That same day Dani took me to see all the places she loved in New York and afterwards my feet were killing me.

Why did we have to walk everywhere ?

When it came time for dinner Dani wanted to lay once again but I didn't feel right. I mean I wasn't used to a girl paying for my stuff. I usually am the one paying for everything and now here comes Dani who wants to pay for Dinner and for trips .She is so independent .I mean I love that about her but I also want to be able to spoil her .

I have nothing against that but I have never met a girl like her. She always tells me that we have to be equal to each other .I love her way of thinking honestly.

———————

My online classes just resulted in me doing assignments the teachers will send me .

Dani  helped me with some of my work so I was able to finish them on time .

She wouldn't give me the answers but she would explain in a more easier way for me to understand .She even gave me homework from her class which I thought wasn't fair because I was her boyfriend .She chuckled when I told her that.

"Sweetheart, that's not the way it works ." She teased me then leaned into me pecking my lips "in School im Miss.Henderson." She bit my bottom lip sliding down my neck slowly. She knows how easily I get turned on by her and is like she is doing it on purpose while I'm doing homework .

She then moves her lips up to my earlobe, biting it and nibbling it "So do your homework." She whispers seductively and walks away leaving me with a huge boner .

"Dani !!" I whined ,I heard her giggle from the kitchen.

But she wanted to play the teasing game but if she only knew I could play it better .

Suddenly my phone rang but it wasn't a normal call, it was  FaceTime and guess who it was .

"Hello ." I answer not turning the camera on

"Eddie, how are you feeling ?" A worried Dustin asked.

"Cough ,I'm ok ." I did my best to do a sick voice

"Turn on your camera ,everyone is here, we got worried when we heard you were sick ." Shit what am I gonna do now ?

I pretended to cough again and walk to a more close area because this apartment had windows everywhere; it was mostly windows than walls .

I walk to the room passing Dani who was laying down in bed half naked wearing only panties and one of my shirts .

She saw me and lifted her shirt up for her panties to show even more .

"You fucking kidding me sweetheart!!." I whisper yell.

She patted the bed and I sat next to her not turning the camera on .

"Eddie, are you still there ?" Dustin shouted

"Yeah I'm here ." I responded ,Jesus Christ

Danielle you were going to be the death of me .

"Well we want to see you !!" The boys shouted

Fucking he'll what do i do?

So I just turn on the camera not showing my face but the ceiling .

"Eddie, where are you?" Dustin ask

"My room." I lied ,I was bad at lying and I knew because I would start panicking .

"Yeah ,sure, don't lie to me, that ceiling doesn't look like your room." Dustin raised a brow .

I look up the ceiling how the fuck can he tell how my ceiling looks.

I turned my head to the side and Danny wasn't there anymore.

Where the fuck did she go ?

I continue talking to the boys for a little longer. They all ask me questions of how I'm feeling and when I'm going back to school.

Henderson was the one that kept asking me the most weird questions .

Saying why my room looks so different,and how exactly did I feel .He even told me he went to visit me at the trailer but uncle Wayne told him I was asleep.

Uncle Wayne was the best for covering for me .

Henderson even mentioned Dani was in New York for a job thing .I have no idea why he told me that is not I care .supposably.

The door from the restroom opened and I almost choked on my saliva coughing this time actually coughing not fake coughing when I saw Dani .

She walks out wearing this black lace bra pair with the same underwear more like those pieces you see in a Victoria's Secret magazine .

And fucking fuck she look hot .

My mouth fell open looking at her walk this way , moving her hips side to side and laying down next to me .

"Eddie, are you ok?" One of the boys asks and I just nod looking at Dani who is laying down next to me looking at me with those eyes full of lust .

Her hand moves to her Breast then slides down in between her legs  and she starts to gently rub circles on her clit ,she covers her mouth muffling her moans .

What the fuck was she doing ?

"I gotta take my medicine bye Henderson." I hung up the phone so fast and placed it on the side table. I didn't even let poor Henderson speak ..But I'll deal with him later .

Now I have something important to take care of and that something important being my sexy ass girlfriend ..

Now my focus was Dani who was giggling as she stood up putting her two fingers in her mouth tasting herself, sucking them clean.

"Sweetheart, are you trying to get us caught ?" I tell her

"No." She says innocently battling her eyelashes .

Then she crawled on top of me and pushed me down in bed leaning down to kiss my lips .

She licked my bottom lip asking for entrance and I didn't have to think twice in letting her in my mouth.Her tongue entered my mouth and I tasted every single part of her mouth in mine .

Dani started moving slowly back and forth on my clothed cock and fuck it felt good everything she did felt good without thinking I let out an embarrassing moan.Then Suddenly she stood up out of nowhere and I instantly missed the feeling of her on top of me .She then pulls down my boxers all the way down to my ankles and I push them off .Then she crawled back stroking my dick slowly .

"Fuck !!" I grunted

She look at me and smile and lower her mouth down to my cock and then swirl her tongue around the tip and fuck that felt amazing .

She pushed down my length taking everything she could inside her mouth while giving it gentle strokes with her hand.Danielle Henderson Owned me right now she had me moaning like know-one ever had before and honestly I didn't care I was loving every second of it.I grab a fist full of hair on my hand and move her head up and down my length .She watched me with teary eyes but wouldn't stop her motion.

And fuck she look sexy as fuck pleasing me.

"Shit oh fuck Baby stop ." I grunt "I don't want to cum yet ." I tell her

She smiles at me and stands up over me positioning herself on my cock and slowly lowers herself down my cock, both moaning in unison by the sensation.

Fuck she drove me crazy the things she made me feel where out of this world .I don't know how much I could take watching her bounce on my cock.I grabbed her ass, squeezing it tightly helping her move faster up and down my cock Dani wasn't holding back she was being very vocal today and that shit was driving me crazy yes I've heard her make those beautiful noises for me but today she was out of control and I was loving it.

"Eddie, I'm.." She moan trying her best to make a sentence but wasn't able to because her orgasm hit her out of nowhere coming undone all over my cock her arousal dripping down my balls  and I got to tell you that fucking felt amazing her walls tightening around my cock squeezing it tight making me come inside of her hard .

I don't know what it was but it was one of the best orgasms in my life .

She leans down to peck my lips .

"Fuck Dani what was that ?" I said breathlessly trying to catch my breath.

"I just love you ." She kisses my lips passionately with me still inside of her .I could feel myself getting hard again and i hear her giggle

"Someone's ready ." She says and I guess it was time for round 2.

She smiles in the kiss and continues kissing me and I flip her around in all her fours smacking her ass .

What a fucking perfect view I had .

I took my cock in my hand and teased her entrance with my tip ."You want this ?"

"Yes." She responded

"Yeah you want my cock baby ."

"Yes ,Eddie please ." She begged and who was I to deny my queen I gave her what she wanted .

"Baby you don't know what you do to me."I tell her But I could fucking die in her arms tonight with the way she made me feel .

——————-

That week we had so much sex that I didn't know how my dick was still working right now .And if she wasn't wearing that thing in her arm not to get pregnant I would be so worried right now because I came inside so many times that I lost count.and for sure she will have gotten pregnant .

Today was the weekend finally no school time to rest for school work and we were also taking Nathan to the zoo.I was pretty excited and also nervous because I wanted to make a  good impression on Nathan .I wasn't trying to replace Liam I just wanted him to like me .If you would have told me a year ago that I would be trying to impress a 5yr old I would have laugh in your face because I'm not good with kids and look at me now brushing my damn hair so it be a mess wearing a hoodie so I won't be cold and practicing what I'm going to be saying to him without a bad word on a sentence .

Why was I so nervous to meet a 5yr old !!!

I mean I was also nervous well not nervous I don't know how to feel about this one because

I didn't like the fact that Liam was going with us, I was doing it for Dani and her son .I know i'm going to have to see him more now that I know they have a son together .Even though it was weird for me knowing that Dak had a son an actual son and she never told me about him .

I'm not mad at her it's understandable her wanting to keep it a secret .Maybe she thought I wasn't mature enough to handle a kid I mean come on I'm still in high school a 20yr old in high school well about to turn 21 but I'm still In high school !!!!

I needed to calm down before heading out to the zoo. I didn't want to stress Dani out more than she was .

————-

When we arrived at the zoo Dani ,Nate and I waited for Liam to arrive .The whole time that we were waiting Nate kept staring at me. He wouldn't keep his eyes from me .

Maybe I had something in my face .Or was it because I was holding his mom's hand!

"Hi." I heard a small little voice said .

I look down to see Nate looking up at me smiling .

I looked at Dani then at Nate .Maybe he was talking to his mom but Dani was busy on the phone talking to Liam.

"H-hi." I stuttered

"What's your name ?" Nate asked me

"M-my name !" I say pointing to myself .

Nate just nods yes

"Eddie ." I responded

"Eddie,I like how you dressed." He smiles pouting at my hoodie .

"Y-you like my outfit ?" I smile a big toothy grin. A kid has never liked my outfit ever. They are always too scared of me but Nate likes my outfit and Holy shit !! He just held my hand .

"Dani?" I whispered, trying not to scare Nate away and maybe he would let go of my hand .

"Yeah baby ." She answered, looking at me .

I signal with my eyes to Nate who is holding my hand.

"He is holding my hand ." I mouth

Dani punches her brow and looks down at Nate and seeing Nate holding my hand brings a smile to her face then it fades away when she hear Liam's voice calling her name .

Yup the moment was ruined.

Nate ran up to his dad  and jump into his arms .Liam seem so happy seeing his son I've never seen this side of him I've only met the asshole part of him but then again the moment was ruined when Liam and Dani started arguing of who was going to pay for the entrance.So to stop the arguing I decided to paid while they where busy arguing with each other plus I still had some money saved up for the road trip I was supposed to take next summer.

"Come on." I tell both Dani and Liam after paying for the tickets ,Nate runs up to me and holds my hand .I smile at him and start walking inside the zoom.

Which by the way was fucking huge .

I didn't even know where to start .

With my free hand I try opening the map I was given at the entrance and scan it carefully.

Holy shit this zoo was big I didn't even know where to start .

"Where do you want to go ?" I asked Nate who was already looking up at me .

"Wherever you want to go ." He tells me sweetly.

"Ok, let's see here." I tell him looking at the map trying to figure out if to go left or right .

"What ?" Liam asks, standing next to me while I look at the map .

"I paid already ." I tell Them closing up the map and I just let Nate guide me ,he seems to know where to go .So I'd follow my tiny tour guide to wherever he was taking me ..

I was excited as much as Nate was but I wasn't gonna show it.I was trying to keep my cool in front of Liam. I didn't want him to think I was immature or something.

Well maybe I was .

But I wasn't gonna prove him right was i?

"Eddie, look at the Tigers!!" Nathan said, pointing excitedly to the tiger exhibit where two tigers were playing or maybe fighting or where they were ??

We both stand watching the tigers like two kids. To be fair Nate is a kid. I'm just well excited .

———————————————-

I was snapping pictures like crazy all day of all

The animals and Nate and Dani and some of Liam with them .I mean I can golpéate him he wasn't being an ass right now .At the moment .

We continued walking, watching all kinds of animals and also we made a quick stop at the gift shop .

I got super excited when I saw the penguins. They were so cute. I mean they were just penguins, they were whatever doing their penguin thing .

"Are you having fun ?" Dani hugs me from behind.

"Yeah ." I reply looking at the penguins jumping into the water .

"It's our secret baby ." She whispers standing next to me .

"Huh?" I ask her looking at her with a raised brow

"My metal head likes penguins is our secret ." She pecks my lips

I scrunch my nose and peck her lips .

"No I don't ." I chuckled

"Eddie !!!" Nate runs to me "Did you see the garafes? 🦒."

The 3 of us chuckled because we actually understood what he meant .

"No take me ." I tell him and he grabs my hand leading me to see the garafes as he calls them.

—————————-

After the zoo we all Went to get some Pizza which Liam decided to pay for everyone which I couldn't complain about.I mean free food tastes better .

After our exciting day we all headed back to the apartment to watch Madagascar which Nate had chosen to watch .Because he said that the movie was filmed in the same zoo we were at and who was I to tell him that the movie was a cartoon and they didn't really film it there .

So when started the movie started Nate came and sat in between Dani and me .The biggest smile grew on my face when he held my hand on his .I could hear Dani and Liam whispering of how Nate has never been like this with anyone .and I could swear I heard Liam said that I was a good guy .

Nathan fell asleep on my lap halfway through the movie and I felt special that he liked me .

He actually likes me .

Dani looked down at Nate and at me "he likes you." She says softly "I like him too ." I peck her lips

"Thank you for not running away."Dani pecks my lips once more ..

My phone rings interrupting the moment .I groaned and pulled away and looked at the number and it was Robin so I answered fast.

"Hey Buckley ." I answer

"Hey Eddie, my dad wants to speak to your friend. Is she there with you ?" She ask

"Yeah she is here ." I look at Dani and at Liam

"Yeah they are here." I replied I passed the phone to Dani and Liam Who put the phone on speaker and started Talking to Robin's dad telling him everything about Nathan and what Liam's mother had done .

He told them that it would be a hard case because they had signed the custody papers but if they had enough proof and Liam's dad was willing to confess that could help them a lot .

While Dani and Liam  talk to Robin's dad I pick up Nate gently and take him to bed to  the other room..I lay him gently in the bed and take  off his shoes and  cover him with the blanket.

I didn't even recognized myself right now fucking a kid to bed .I mean never in a millions would have I thought u would be doing this .i always  thought i would suck at being a dad I mean i know he is not my son .But he was Dani's son and i hope that one day he would accept me .

Before leaving I turn on the nightlight we had bought for him today at the zoo and close the door to the room.And walk back to the living room with Dani and. liam.I never thought I would say that in a sentence because I hated that guy .But here I was going to the zoo with him, Dani and their son .But I did all of that for Dani because I love her .I don't know what that guy has against me well I do but I never did anything to him .

While Dani and Liam talked to Robin's dad I  decided to catch on some of my homework.

Which wasn't too much .But I wanted them to have their privacy .

After they hung up ,Dani came looking for me.I was in the room doing homework at least that's what I told her but in reality I was researching how to be a dad .I wasn't going to tell her that because I didn't want to embarrass myself .

"Hey baby." Dani coo sitting down next to me in bed

"Hey sweetheart how did everything go?" I asked her closing my laptop .

"Well it was good I guess there's a lot of things that need to be done it's a long process but we got a case ." She smiled weakly .

I pulled her close to me and kissed the top of her head "everything is going to be fine sweet girl ." I coo

"I'm sorry Ed's." She said softly

"Sorry for what?"

"For not telling you about Nate ." She choke on her words

"You have nothing to be sorry about, sweetheart,but I'm not gonna lie. I was a bit surprised and I also panicked ." I paused and sat up straight with my back against the headboard.

"Why scared ?"

"B-because I was afraid Nate wanted to like me or that I was going to suck at being a f-father figure ." I said the last part almost as a whisper .I couldn't believe I had said that to Dani. What if she didn't think I was a good father figure too.

"Ed's baby really ?You thought you wouldn't be a good father figure for Nate ." Dani's voice sounded so squeaky so I turned to look at her and she was crying .

"Hey ." I jumped to bed and held her tight in my arms .

"Ed's y-you want hiccup to be Nate's hiccup dad too?" Dani cried .

"Sweetheart I love you so fucking much and I would do anything for that little boy in there."I pouted to wall that separated abates room from ours .

"Like making our trip short and going back to Hawkins ?"

"Even that sweetheart ."

I didn't mind that our trip was gonna be cut short ,but I know it meant Dani and Liam weren't gonna be able to see Nathan for awhile again .

Or at least I was hoping that His mother would let him stay with Dani for a while in Hawkins .

We had to go back to Hawkins so Dani and Liam could take whatever evidence they had to Robin's dad plus he had to go over the case .

———-

Around 10pm Liam left saying he was gonna go home and rest because tomorrow morning he was going to talk to his mother .

After a long day Dani and I went to take a shower together and after that we went to lay down in bed ,her head resting on my chest and my arm around her rubbing her arm softly with my thumb.

"I really hope we can get Nate back ." She says softly

"We will sweetheart." I kiss the top of her head

"Thank you Eddie ." She looks up at me

"For what ?"

"For sticking here with me today ,I-I know you don't like Liam ."she tells me

"I did it for you Princess and trust me when I tell you that I'll do anything for you ."

And I would do anything for her .If she asked me that she wanted a star I would get it for her .I cringe thinking that it was actually me thinking like that but I didn't care for Dani I could be as sappy as I could be .

————-

After a while Dani fell asleep ,I stayed awake thinking of  everything that has happened since we arrived here in New York, like finding out she had a son ,then what I told her in new years I couldn't believe I actually promised to Marry her one day ,I think I was really going crazy for her .

I hated the word marriage ,now I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and Nathan .

Love really made me change.

Next chapter

[lilfriedpatata]

Changes.

I feel unbothered by the idea of leaving home - I started to look up other countries I might be interested in visiting, but then I thought "I don't even wanna come back here in the first place, the reason why I want to leave is just so that I never come back to the old me." So I did throw the idea of back-pack travel around Europe.

"What if we go to the great land of England?" I said to myself. The more I learn about this country the more I love it - I hope this is not just a flashy feeling I'll forget in a couple of days. Because taking this leap is literally the scariest thing I could ever think of - me, alone, in a different country, across the globe? I get the hibbie jibbies every single time I think of it but in a good way.

I've been a kid my whole life, who never had to make any decisions whatsoever in her life, but now I see myself trying to get to adult stuff and it freaks me out - yes I know I'm 22 but according to my therapist I'm stuck, trauma things I suppose.

So I want to take it step by step, if I get confused I can always ask... right? The first step is getting a passport, that's an easy part. Next - I don't really know.

This would be SO much easier if had a family member, a friend, a friend of a friend... someone, ANYONE who's done this before. It's hard to be alone in this in a way, specially with my anxiety crippling right behind me. I wanna stay positive and I want to try but sometimes I wish someone could help me figure it out. Sometimes it seems like a lot - even if it's not, idk.

I know changes are hard, but I've been through them since forever so I don't even know why this is triggering me so much - maybe my therapist would help.

Actually, I want a new therapist, one that can give me more than words, I think I need to go deep into the roots of this trauma (that could possibly go way back) but I'm not sure if it's worth it.

I think I'll focus on one big change in a while. I'll be getting a cat soon, that made me less sad. Let's start there. There's no rush... yeah, no rush.

°ೃ ༄

[theuntitledduser]

Chapt 2

A troubled task for a love that last (don’t judged me for this title)

“The night just started and I’m already feeling sh!tty��� Lady macaron said to her self as before this she was included in a sudden food fight normally she was more than excited during these activities but sadly tonight was not the night for her because she was originally planning to visit her “good friend” Bonz eye cause lately she has been thinking about her a lot and when she is near her she can feel what we call “butterflies in the stomach”

Lady macaron:ugghh now I gotta clean up

The macaron said to her self as she walked in disgust and cake frosting all over her as she was walking back to the sweet shop she accidentally bumped into the science alliance when they were carrying some science tools and equipment for something

Lady macaron:ughh! What is this *frighten by the unknown liquid on her*

Starscoper:umm *looks worried at team mates* not to worry umm let me help you up

Lady macaron:*hits Starscope’s hand* I can perfectly get up on my own now

Lady macaron:Now I think I said what…..is ….THIS *waving her hands to her body covered in still unknown liquid and is visibly angry*

Dr Flaskentein: ummm uhh here how about Starscope to the lab to get checked just in case

Starscope after several hours later: okay you seem to be fine with all your test you may go now

Lady macaron:you sure sure

Starscope :yep super

Lady macaron:hmmm make sure of that

Starscope:mmmm

*Lady macaron leaves slamming the door*

Starscope:whoooo thank the stars she finally left *wipes sweat off*

*suddenly hears a sound of a printer printing something*

Starscope :*grabs it and reads it* uh oh

*some time later*

Lady macaron:ahh vinally

*the macaron said to her self looking at herself at a really shiny glass at the sugar shocks place finally cleaned off any cake or weird substance from earlier*

Lollylicks:eyy Lady can you help us carry this lollipop we’re going to try to put this in the fountain apparently the Science alliance put a new machine to make the water vibrate making waves

Lady macaron:Uhh guyz as much as I want to help I really can’t really right now especially since that food fight earlier also I have to visit-

Lollylicks:aww come on lady we’ll also let you ride the lollipop

*the lollipop whined*

Lady macaron:*sigh*okay fine let’s go

*they arrived at the fountain*

Lady macaron:*really sweaty and out of breath* okay iz this okay now

Lollylicks:yeah thanks Lady your a real friend wanna try it first my treat

Lady macaron:no itz okay Lols there’s no need for that also I really need to go now bye

Lollylicks:oh okay see ya…….wow she is fast

Starscope runs to lollylicks:Hey! Have you seen Lady macaron anywhere

Lollylicks:yeah she just left actually Why?

Starscope :wha where WHERE!

Lollylicks:geez dude I don’t know she just ran she said she’s going to see someone chill out you’re giving me the hibbie geebies vibes

*Meanwhile*

Lady macaron: *sigh* vhere is Bonz eye?

*she sees Bonz eye with a tux similar to the one she wore at the bot prom speaking to herself and the macaron decided to follow her near enough to the sweet shop that was when lady spoke up saying*

Lady macaron:vell vhy don’t you try to practice with the real me?

*which shocked the bonzai Lady macaron always found that shocked face the bonzai tree had on right now was quite silly and interesting to see since she rarely sees her like that so she found it rather amusing*

Lady macaron:oh what are these *sees the flowers and grab them* vho are these for bonz eye vho’s the lucky lady huh *waves them around*

Bonz eye:uhh they are actually for you lady

*when Lady macaron heard that from that certain bot she felt those “butterflies in the stomach” feeling in her stomach again it hurt but in a good way she had no way of explaining it but her face could very much explain it with her expression from her eyes to her mouth and to the blue energon flowing through her face making it visibly blue*

Lady macaron:ohh umm * clears throat* anything else bonz eye

Bonz eye:umm I was also wondering if you wanted to go out with me on Saturday if you are free

*the macaron realized the embarrassment and blueness on the Bonz eyes face realizing how the she felt about her not even being able to look at her she couldn’t help but chuckle about it as she found it A very cute thing and when the bonzai upped her head to see why she was laughing the macaron decided to give her a little peck on her cheek near her mouth as she didn’t want to get to far right away*

Lady macaron:*chuckles* vhell see you then Bonzie~

*she said walking back to the sugar shocks place feeling quite happy even though what happened with the food fight, and the mysterious substance all of it was worth it for that question by that bot*

*the hole was about to close signifying the end of this chapter*

Starscope :wait wait wait hold up *fits in the hole before it closes* if you must know the thing that I just realized is that Lady macaron is-

Narrator:but bup bup hush make it a cliffhanger for the viewers they’ll find out and the two lesbies that are being told about in this very fic

Starscope :but she is-

Narrator:okay you’re really pissing me off now good bye *snaps fingers*

The end

Lady Macaron x Bonz eye

The question

Today err tonight is like any other night the bots were partying, the night guard was being interrogated by the agent everything is going well for tonight- but where’s the lost bots!?

*Meanwhile at the lost and founds*

*the lost bots were helping Bonz eye cause tonight was the night Bonz eye was going to ask out the sweet Lady Macaron*

Bugertron:you can do this Bonz!

Kikmee:Yeah Bonz,umm do you normally do your ties like that here let me just-

Dimlit:Here some flowers aswell Bonz eye Jackie helped me pick them out and added some perfume aswell *hands them over to Bonz eye*

Bonz eye:gee thanks guys a lot how will I ever thank you

Bugertron:of course Bonzie and you can thank us by going out there and asking a very important French pastrie*pushes Bonz eye out of the lost and found leading Bonz eye to start her journey to the sugar shocked place*

*while Bonz eye was walking to the sugar shocks thinking about how will she approach and speak lady macaron*

Bonz eye:Hey lady- no *clears throat* hi! Lady would you like to- not quite wasup-nope!

*while the bonzai was constipainted about what to say she was basically up in the clouds about this she did not notice she was being followed by a very cheeky macaron*

Lady Macaron:Vell vwhy don’t you practice whit the real me bonz eye

Bonz eye:OHH lady! *the bonzai was completely red err blue from realizing that the macaron was just right there listening to her* *clears throat* how long have you been standing there *looking away from embarrassment*

Lady Macaron:mmm long enough *sees the flowers in Bonz’s hands* ohhh *grabs them* vho’s the special bot Bonzie~ *waving the flower in her hands*

Bonz eye:Oh umm, soo this are actually for you Lady *she lowered her voice in that last part out of embarrassment*

Lady macaron:Ohh *blushes* umm thanks you iz Zhat all Bonz

Bonz eye: Umm *exhales* I was also wondering if you wanted to go out with me this Saturday aswell *the bonz said getting more blue that she can be compared to a blueberry*

*the macaron noticed change in the Bonz eye’s face*

*Suddenly a chuckle came from the macaron when Bonz eye upped her head she was shocked as she received a small peck on her face very close to her lips*

Lady macaron: *chuckles* sure…..well see vou zhen Bonz eye

*the macaron says as she walks away to her candy store which Bonz eye just realized she was already in front of*

Bonz eye:oh *puts her hand on the place Lady had just kissed her on* okay…….it worked out not bad

*back at the lost and found*

*Bonz eye enters the door*

Bugertron:hey hey- *got pushed by Kikmee* ack

Kikmee:OH my gosh there you are *grabs Bonz eye by the arms tightly* tell us everything and don’t leave out a single detail

Clogstopper: yeah Bonz did ya do it or not big ma- I mean girl

Bugertron:guys give her some space okay but what happened

Bonz eye:*exhales* I did it!

Dimlit:Whooo good job

Bonz eye: *laughs* thanks guys

Bugertron:*looks up* okay gang *claps his hands together* it looks like the mall is bout to open so time to sleep okay

The end

[thedetectiveofinaba]

If there’s any advice I want to give when researching for backgrounds for a verse/visuals/plotlines it’s that you should listen to your gut feeling and stop if you feel tired of the amount of content and/or get unmotivated or overwhelmed. A small break doesn’t mean that you’re abandoning that ship and you should rather take things slow than force yourself to finish it in one sitting. Not everyone can binge watch sth for the same amount and that is OK. Sometimes your emotions or the events in the game cause a reaction you couldn’t have foreseen and you need to calm down from that - and that is something nobody should be forced to justify to anyone. 

I did that mistake in digging up lore for XY games and with the Rival Run I had and the arcade fighting spin-offs (P4A and P4AU) & got a long-lasting emotional effects from both. Thankfully I realized how I can use that as a way to flip the bird at my brain who thought they could have the upper hand: The afterburn and disappointment of XY is something I have been able to use in my writing for Serena and Calem and showcase how spite or “I want to prove someone I can do thing X or do it for their sake” never works. As for the P4A and AU? I figured out what I want to focus in and adapt the two routes I want to highlight how my girl would see it from her perspective and deciding that I will focus on that when I feel like it.

You can have outer motivations but they never work as their own thing: you need the inner drive and interest to keep up the pace. If you don’t want to do sth but feel like you need to in the writing hobby, just don’t do it. You will be grateful you chose to listen to what your heart really wanted. If you want an example on that failing, look no further than my Serena on defeating E4 just to kick Diantha out or Terra from KH: BBS. He tried to use darkness, spite and “since I got this chance, I will prove to Eraqus that I am as good as Aqua” as a source of strength and look where it got him. A state of mess and he needed to use more effort in getting over the emotional turmoil.

[miengsol]

14, 29, 30, 39, and... 25, but pre & post Mana opinions; for Pain TM 😭 and J !!

meta meta meta!! ( ft. uncommon questions w/ @undrowns ) || still accepting!!

14. what animal do they fear most?

hmm, he's not as big of an animal person as other people might be ( although he can appreciate a doggo when he sees one! i actually think he'd be great with a cat which i should let him get some time in the future alas- ) BUT insects of any kind do give him the hibbie jibbies. pls don't give him a close up of an insect of any kind, including butterflies. flies are the creepiest of them all probably.

29. do they usually live up to their own ideals?

yes and no. and i say that because from an objective perspective, he does. he really does practice what he teaches to erza- mercy, compassion, understanding, and selflessness. however, he's so hard on himself he doesn't think he's actually any of those things. his guilt makes it difficult for him to see himself as a good person so even if he acts like a good person, he doesn't think he actually IS a good person. it's one of those cases where someone is instinctively a trait without even realizing it.

30. Who do they most regret meeting?

daniel. mana. maybe if they had never met him, they would still be alive. okay honestly, i don't think there's really any one calum necessarily regrets meeting, because he thinks pretty much everyone he's met has had good intentions. and therefore, how could he blame them when things don't go...well. that being said, he does look back on his college days and wish he didn't stick so closely to KSA ( korean student association ) when there were people outside of that circle that he clearly clicked with better.

39 was answered so instead i'll do 38. what memory do they revisit the most often?

college times with mana and daniel! one example is during cram season when they were studying together in the library. daniel started drawing gudetama on a post-it note and mana said it looked more hopeless than tired. daniel disagreed. they bantered before turning to calum for the final verdict. calum was sleepy and did not take sides much to their ( mock ) displeasures so daniel gave him the post-it note to judge later.

this was also the moment when calum began using post-it notes on the daily.

25. what are their thoughts on marriage?

( wow winter, i thought we had a truce here- jk thanks for the pain 😭 )

pre-mana's passing, he highly recommends it to anyone who has a loving and stable relationship with their partner ( hint, hint when's the wedding tirora?? ). it means always having someone to come home to, someone who has chosen and promised to stay by your side for the long run.

post-mana's passing, it's not something he's ever considering again. well actually, you gotta include romantic love in this as well. he doesn't think he's deserving of marriage, let alone romantic love....bc if he wasn't able to save his wife ( ie. survivor's guilt talking here, survivor's guilt talking here ), how could anyone else trust their life with someone like him? basically, it's something he would want for his friends ( if they desired it ), but it's not something he sees for himself any time in the future.

J) did you have to manipulate or exclude canon factors to allow them to create their character?

he's an oc so technically whatever i say about him is canon, but that being said....WELL U SEE WINTER, so you know the original storyline calum used to have. my thesis was actually a huge part in changing his story to the way it is now. i had to be willing to change the original canon of his backstory ( specifically the part before he started dating mana ) in order for the thesis to actually...flow? there needed to be more conflict and tension specifically between mana and calum so separating them after they graduated was the way to go. also by changing calum's childhood to a slightly more unhappier version, it also helped with explaining why he's so much of a people-pleaser.

now as for his present and events that led up to it- you've heard me say it before!! i wanted to give calum more agency in his story and this was the best way i could come up with. it couldn't just be calum JUST moving forward with the passage of time, he needs to have something that's going to make him WANT to move forward. and that something is erza.

[hibernia-1]

My “real” name (so many of my friends - also in “real life” - call me Hib that the lines are blurry, also Hib suits me like a glove) has tons of opportunities for spelling errors (this goes for both my surname as my given name). And boy, are people going out of their way to MAKE THEM ALL! 

So this was funny to me.

Something else about names... I always like it when people give their own twist to my name(s). One of my Irish friends can’t pronounce my (RL) name, so he always calls me an English version of it. Which, for an Irishman with a traditional Irish name, is a very ironic thing to do. But mostly he just calls me ‘G’ (first letter of my RL name).

Another friend of mine always calls me ‘Hibby’. An old schoolfriend usually says ‘Hibje’ (diminutive for ‘Hib’). The Colonel and The Team and Mr James use ‘Miss Hib’. And @conduitstreetcat went for ‘Hibs’ today in a very kind message, and I liked that a lot as well.​

Names are fascinating and powerful.

[saintbrown]

Alright, so I started listening to The Magnus Archives and decided to post about my thoughts on each episode, 10 episodes at a time, while they are still fresh in my mind, because why not. If you don’t know what TMA is, it’s basically the audio recordings of an archivist of the Magnus Institute, which deals with the supernatural. John, the archivist, puts into audio format the archived statements of people who believe to have had an encounter with anything that the Institute might be concerned with. While it is classified as a horror podcast, I wouldn’t really call it a “keep you up at night” horror, more of a “that’s a really interesting monster of the week” kind of horror. Welp, with out further ado, let’s start with the first ten:

1) Angler Fish - A pretty good start to the series, the Angler Monster is an easy concept to understand, and I appreciate that John is skeptical of the statement since the guy was drunk when he found it, and there fore had to look into the matter to confirm it, it adds realism to the premise of “institute that investigates the supernatural”.

2) Do Not Open - Now here’s a guy that knows his supernatural, coffin that says “do not open”, he doesn’t open it, it starts to scratch when you put stuff on top of it, he stops putting stuff on top of it, it starts to sing, he plays louder music, it tries to have him open the coffin while sleep walking, he puts the key in a block of ice, fucking git gud casual. We never do find out what’s in the coffin, but by the singing and the mind control I would wager it was something akin to a siren.

3) Across The Street - I have to admit that I’m not quite sure what happened in this one, mostly because there were window thingamajigs that I’m not familiar with, and there fore could not picture. My best bet is that this dude, or a different monster all together, had to keep an eye out so he wouldn’t get body snatched by some psychic chameleon guy, and then he dies, the end.

4) Page Turner - A word to the wise folks, if a book is leather bound, written in Latin and gives you headaches when you read it, then not only is it not a good buy, it’s most likely cursed as all hell. I do like that at the end, John is just like “Christ, another one? How much can one men write in a life time?”

5) Thrown Away - This one just sounds like some ancient warlock was taking the piss by seeing how much creepy shit he can throw out before someone goes insane. The guy at end had the right idea though, you see a metal heart with someone’s name engraved in it, don’t even think about it, just burn that shit. Speaking of which...

6) Squirm - Now this guy really has his priorities straight, your lady friend bursts into a bunch of worms? Burn it, burn your whole apartment while you’re at it. This one really gave me the hibby jibbies, bugs crawling inside my skin is one of the things that really freaks me out. Also, I’ll bet you anything that that guy has worms in his bladder now, if nothing else.

7) The Piper - Not much to say about this one, the description of the embodiment of war is pretty interesting, but other than that there isn’t much to speculate. This one just kind of is what it says it is.

8) Burned Out - Kind of a standard ghost story, but the schizophrenia aspect gives it a “did it actually happen” feel until the end. I do wander if the guy with the bones in his hands is a monster that will show up later. What does that even mean? Does he only have his hand bones, or does he have half a skeleton in each hand?

9) A Father’s Love - You know, despite the fact that he was a serial killer and a cultist, this guy seemed like a pretty ok dad. 4/10, might daughter again.

10) Vampire Killer - Now here’s a character that deserves his own movie, homeless guy that kills vampires? Sounds like a franchise to me! It’s always interesting how vampires are depicted in different works of fiction, and this one is no exception, with how they boil down to human shaped psychic leeches that burn easily, shame that he died before he could say anymore about his other encounters. It’s funny that, out of anything so far, vampires seem to be what John is the most skeptical about.