#hi in case your wondering where ive been life has been kicking my ass and also ive been churning out drawings that nobody cares about

[side-sidecast]

queen and her lover who somehow forgets that his job is loving her

[just-dreaming-marvel]

A Loss

MAIN MASTERLIST

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 2,125ish

Summary: You find out some news, but also overhear a conversation that affects the news. You go out on a mission, knowing you shouldn’t.

Warnings: injury and loss of life.

Notes: this was requested. Hope y’all enjoy.

It was weird. You hadn’t even realized you were 6 weeks late until you woke up, throwing up on the floor right next to Bucky’s bed. Thank heavens for FRIDAY’s immediate response for calling the maid and that your boyfriend was out on his morning run with Steve. You cleaned yourself up and quickly left for the store before anyone could even notice you were gone.

You were anxious the whole time. Knee bouncing, hands shaking, heart racing. You felt like you were going to pass out as you allowed yourself to pee on that little stick you had just bought. You paced inside the bathroom of your private room. You didn’t want to chance Bucky walking in on you. Plus, you were terrified. Bucky and you and been dating for a little over a year now and not once had the two of you talked about marriage or family. You wanted that all with him, but you feared that he didn’t want that all with you.

When your phone’s timer went off, you froze. It took you what felt like hours to convince yourself to look at the results. It was positive. You were pregnant. The joy that filled your heart did not fill your eyes. Tears of worry filled your eyes and your mind began to wonder how Bucky would take the news. 

“FRIDAY?” You called out. “Where’s Bucky?”

“Sargent Barnes is currently watching TV with Captain Rogers in the common room,” the AI responded. “Would you like me to get him for you?”

“No, I can get him myself.”

You were shaking with excitement and fear as you went down the hall, heading towards the common room. As you drew near, you could hear the men talking about something. You listened closely.

“You can’t tell me you didn’t think that baby in the diaper commercial wasn’t cute, Buck,” Steve teased.

“I never said it wasn’t!” Bucky replied. “I just just ‘eh’.”

“You and Y/N ever talk about having kids? Starting a family?”

“No,” Bucky responded, almost too quickly. You froze, hiding behind the wall to still listen in. “That’s not for me. Maybe back when we were still in the 40’s, definitely not now. Can you imagine, me, being a father?” Bucky scoffed. “Carrying around a child with this metal arm? What stories would I tell it anyway? About that time I murdered Stark’s parents? Can you imagine—“

“Alright, alright,” Steve chuckled. “I get it. Have you at least talked to Y/N about this? She might have an opinion on the matter too.”

“No I haven’t. And I don’t plan on it until she brings it up.”

“Seriously, punk?”

“I don’t want to ruin what we have.”

“And you’ve never thought that, with all the sex you two have, a baby might just accidentally happen for the two of you?”

“It couldn’t. She’s on the pill and we always use protection.”

“Always?”

“Whatever the case is, she’s on the pill. And I’m not meant to be a father. Can we drop this now and go back to watching football?”

You handed your had covering your mouth, trying not to let them here your sobs. Quickly, yet as quietly as you could, you ran too your room. You ordered FRIDAY to lock everyone, including Bucky, out as you curled up onto the floor and cried. You had no idea of what to do.

~~~

“Hey, doll,” Bucky knocked on your door later that evening. “You in there? I haven’t seen you all day.” No response. “I thought that we could go out for dinner.” Again no response. “Y/N?” He tried the door. “You okay in there? Why can’t I get in?”

“Miss Y/N has ordered that no one be let into her room,” FRIDAY informed Bucky.

“Not even me?”

“Yes.” FRIDAY was silent for a moment. “She is not feeling well and wishes to be left alone.”

You were on your bed, still crying, and listening to the conversation Bucky and FRIDAY were having.

“She’s not feeling well? Why didn’t she tell me?” Bucky began knocking again. “Sweetheart, please, let me in. Let me take care of you.”

“She wishes to be left alone,” FRIDAY repeated.

Bucky sighed. “Just… let me know if you need anything.”

You sobbed as you heard Bucky’s footsteps fade away. You wanted him. That’s all that would be able to comfort you right now, him holding you. But you didn’t know how to tell him about the baby growing inside you. The baby he didn’t want.

~~~

The whole team was woken up in the middle of the night. An emergency mission, and everyone was needed. You knew that you were in no condition, mentally and physically, to go, but it was your job to. It was clear to everyone that you were avoiding Bucky, which didn’t settle well with anyone. You were all on the quinjet, listening to Steve and Tony debrief while you got ready.

“Here,” Bucky said quietly, coming over to you. You were struggling to put your parachute on. “Let me help you.”

“I’m good,” you responded, moving away. The hurt in Bucky’s eyes was impossible to miss. 

“Did I—“ Bucky swallowed. “Did I do something wrong?”

“Now is really not the time to talk about this, Barnes. we’re headed in for a mission.”

“Y/N.” Bucky gently grabbed your wrist, turning you to face him. You looked up at the ceiling as tears tried to form in your eyes. “What’s wrong?”

You ripped your hand out of his grip. “When were you planning on telling me you didn’t see yourself starting a family with me?” Now everyone’s attention was on you and Bucky.

“Doll, I don’t know what you’re—“

“Oh, don’t play dumb with me. I heard you talking to Steve.”

“When did I— oh… Oh, that was— Doll, please, let me explain.”

“Over the drop zone,” FRIDAY announced.

“I think I’ve heard enough,” you growled. You were the first to the ram, jumping off to the fight below.

“What have I done?” Bucky looked at everyone else helplessly.

“Focus on the mission, Buck,” Steve said. “Deal with your personal life later.”

~~~

Each team member was grateful that everyone had come. It seemed that HYDRA had brought in their whole forces. Bucky had tried to stay close to you but was separated quickly in the fight. Everyone was basically on their own. 

You were fighting off flocks of HYDRA goons. Using all your senses to notice any new agent from any direction. It was exhausting, but you were making it look easy. Until, the need to throw up arrived. And you couldn’t hold it back.

“I need…” You panted over the comms, trying your best to hold the bile down. “I need… some help over here…”

“Y/N, are you alright?” Bucky’s panicked voice filled everyone’s ears.

“I… I can’t…” You fought off one more HYDRA agent before collapsing onto your hands and knees, emptying your stomach of all it’s contents.

“Are you throwing up, L/N?” Clint asked over the comms.

“I’m on my way, Y/N!” Bucky shouted. “Stay put!”

“Can’t,” you wiped off your mouth as you kicked an opposing agents legs out from underneath them. “I’m being attacked from all— AH!” 

Searing pain was felt in your stomach. Another one immediately following. One of your hands went to clutch your stomach as the other kept you stable on the ground.

“Y/N!” A chorus of voices sounded in your ear.

“I’m on my way, Y/N!” Bucky sounded terrified. More terrified than anyone had ever heard him before.

The HYDRA agents surrounding you were taken out in one turn of Tony’s lasers as he landed.

“I’ve got her, Barnes,” Tony stated, picking you up. “Meet us at the quinjet.”

“T-tony-y,” you groaned in pain.

“Hang on, Y/N.” He flew you to the quinjet. “You’re not leaving us just yet.”

“I’m… preg— preg… nant….”

“What?” He laid you down on the med-bay table, hoping he did not just hear what he had just heard. 

“I’m… p-pregnant…”

“Barnes, you have 30 seconds to get on this quinjet before I’m leaving your frozen ass.” Tony hurried to the cockpit.

“Why?” Steve asked. “What happened?”

“Y/N’s pregnant.”

“What?!” The chorus of voices exclaimed.

“And… and it’s not looking too good.” Tony turned just in time to see your body completely give out. “FRIDAY get us in the air!” He hurried back over to you, pressing his metal hand on your stomach. “We’re leaving now, Barnes!”

“I’m here! I’m here!” Bucky yelled, running up the ramp as the quinjet was lifting off the ground. “Oh my—“ He fell onto his knees beside your head. “Y/N.” He cried, resting his forehead against yours. “Please… I didn’t mean it… please fight. For me. For our child… I can’t live without you…”

~~~

You were rushed into surgery immediately. Leaving Tony and Bucky helplessly waiting in the other room. The team wasn’t far behind, finding more fight in them after hearing about your condition. They were all in the med-bay waiting room in the Tower, either unable to sit still or being about to sit too still.

Bucky wouldn’t let anyone near him. He stayed on the other side of the room, pacing as he mumbled to himself in Russian and pulled out his hair. Dr. Cho came through the doors 8 hours after you had been taken back. Bucky rushed up to her, but was unable to speak. He feared what the response might be.

“How is she?” Steve asked, resting a hand on his friend’s shoulder.

“Y/N pulled through,” Dr. Cho answered. “She’ll need a good two months off missions, but she’ll survive.”

“An-and… the…” Bucky swallowed as he tried to get the words out. “The baby? Wh-what about the baby?”

Dr. Cho’s eyes gave it away before she could even speak. “The baby didn’t make it. I’m sorry, Sargent Barnes.”

Bucky stood there, clenching his fists before beginning to pace again. The team watched, not knowing how to comfort their friend. Bucky let out a heartbreaking scream as he punched through the wall. Letting the tears fall, he fell onto his knees. His sobs were the most heartbreaking thing any of them had ever heard.

~~~

There was something heavy on your legs. That was the first thing you noticed when you began to come to. The next things were the bandages around your abdomen and the IV in your arm. Slowly blinking to adjust to the lights, you opened your eyes. You looked down to your legs to see Bucky. His shoulders were trembling as he let out quiet sobs into your legs. That’s when you knew.

“I lost it… didn’t I?” Your raspy, quiet voice had Bucky head snapping up in your direction.

“Oh, doll.” Bucky’s eyes were red and puffy. You had never seen them that way before. He gently took hold of your hand, running his thumb across the back of it. “You had me so scared there.”

“The baby, Buck… Is it…” Tears filled your eyes as you trailed off, unable to finish your thought.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.” You didn’t try to stop the loud, painful sob that ripped through you. “I’m so sorry for everything. For what I said. I honestly didn’t mean it. I was scared and I thought that Steve and I were just joking around. If I would have known…. I never should have said any of that to begin with…”

“I was coming to tell you the news, when I heard you two… it broke my heart…”

“I’ll never be able to apologize enough… this is all my fault.”

“No,” you shook your head, “it’s not… I knew what I was risking going out into the field… I was being stupid. I should have insisted on staying here.”

“Will you ever forgive me?”

“I… I honestly never hated you. Just heartbroken… I want you to be honest with me though… do you see a future with me?”

“That’s all I see… that’s what terrifies me. The thought that one day you’ll wake up and realize that I’m not good enough for you and leave… that’s why I haven’t brought anything up. I don’t want this to end.”

“James Buchanan Barnes, I love you. And I never plan on leaving your side. Ever. You here me? And if you ever have those awful thoughts again, you come straight to me, alright? I love you.”

“I love you too, doll. Oh gosh—“ He leaned up and kissed you, hard. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I love you, so much.”

“I love you… And I’m sorry.”

[haikyuuwaifu]

Selfish

Kuroo x Reader x Kenma

MASTERLIST

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Warning: Angst, swearing, implied sexual acts

MASTERLIST

PART IV:

The second time:

Third year was a time of stress, college, and change. Kuroo knew from the time he was in his third year of middle school, that he wanted to leave Japan for college. He had never been anywhere  outside of his home country. As laid back as he was, he busted his ass to keep up with his grades. Sure, he partied and had a good time; but he ensured he did well so he could apply to schools like Yale and Harvard. His hope was to get accepted into Harvard. He had heard from former Nekoma graduates that parties in America were wild and he wanted in. Harvard offered a great business program so he figured he’d kill two birds with one stone. You had no plans to leave Japan. As much as you liked the idea of going with Tetsu across the world, it wasn’t your dream. Aside from the New Years incident the two of you hadn’t had another issue. He stopped going to parties for the rest of that year and you two spent all your free time together or with Kenma. The summer before your third year Kuroo was made captain of the Volleyball club and suddenly all the parties started sprouting up again. As uncomfortable as it made you; you trusted him. He stopped inviting you out to parties and just went out on his own. The start of third year found you building time tables and study material so you could do well and get accepted into Miyagi. Instead of spending time with Tetsu at lunch, you were huddled in the library. After school you were usually at the internet cafe or occupying Kenma’s floor as he gamed. While you were busting your ass Kuroo was living the high life. School had never been difficult for him, so he never really had to try. He spent his lunches talking to the cheerleaders and the other sports captains. He would make sure to text you throughout the day, but more often than not if you didn’t text first; he wouldn’t bother. After practice he would go out with the girls of the volleyball team or the cheer squad. It depended on who got to him first. In his mind, what he was doing was harmless; you were his best girl, but you were never his actual girlfriend. Too bad no one thought to inform you of that fact.

As third year carried on the two of you spent less and less time together. When entrance exams came around you spent an entire week holed up in your room preparing. Kuroo spent the whole week in a different girls bedroom every night. 

After the New Years incident the year prior, things were awkward between you and Tetsu. Kenma being caught in the middle asked you what happened. When you explained what happened Kenma only shook his head and carried on with the game he was playing. He didn’t tell you, but that one moment solidified the fact that he just didn’t want anything to do with Kuroo anymore. He only dealt with him during practice and if he had to deal with him on the weekends it was solely because you were there. Any other time he pretended he was busy or ignored any form of contact Kuroo attempted.

While Kuroo decided to party and sleep his way through third year; Kenma was the one who made sure you were eating enough. He learned how to cook and made an extra bento for you every day. He made sure you weren’t overworking yourself and dragged you out of the library after he finds out you’d been sitting in there for hours. Sundays were usually days where you and Kuroo would go out and do something, but with studying and exams; you stayed in and he was hungover. Kenma ended up shutting his games off on Sundays and dragging you all over Tokyo. As much as he hated going out and dealing with people, he didn’t mind going out with you. In the time that he had come to know you, he had grown to see you as someone more than the giver Kuroo liked to take advantage of. 

Kuroo, though selfish, wasn’t an oblivious idiot. He knew deep down that if Kenma could he would tell you about what he had been doing. As aloof as Kenma seemed, he had always been a perceptive child. And he knew that Kenma had grown to respect you. Sometimes Kuroo would feel guilty about the things he had done, and the way he had treated you. But more often than not he would forget about it as quickly as the thought came. You were his best girl afterall, you’d never abandon him. He knew you didn’t have social media outside of FB. You never saw the need for it, so he made sure to keep his posts private and vague; just in case Kenma saw something he felt the need to share with you. 

Entrance exams came and went. You and Tetsu received your letters and were sitting in his bedroom waiting for the other to open it. He had no idea that you didn’t apply to any schools outside of Japan. You had no idea he only applied to Harvard. You knew what his dream was, but deep down you had hoped that what you had was enough to compromise. Ripping your letters open you both screamed as you received the best news you could possibly hope for. Clutching the letter to your chest you smiled. “I got into Miyagi Tetsu, I got into Miyagi!” He looked at you a little confused. “Miyagi?” he questioned taking the letter and reading it over. “Why would you only apply to schools in Japan?” he asked looking up at you. “I told you, Miyagi was my first choice; I want to be a teacher in the prefecture I grew up in.” You murmur softly folding your hands together. Shaking his head he scoffs. “You can be a teacher anywhere baby, and you can learn anywhere...you were supposed to come to Harvard with me.” taking your hands in his he pulls you closer. “We were supposed to go to the US together. Maybe its not too late for you to a-” cutting off his sentence you pull your hands back and shake your head. “I’m not leaving Japan Tetsu...this has been my dream since I was a child. You should be happy for me.” you declare getting up and placing the letter on your desk. “And what about my dreams? You knew I wanted to go to the US.” he demands standing and facing away from you. Touching his shoulder he shrugs away from you. “Sometimes  I wonder who puts more effort into this.”he states making his way towards the door. Opening it he waves his arm, “I need time to think, so you need to go.” You sigh softly, grabbing your bag. You whisper an apology as you make your way to the front door. “I’ll call you when I’m ready to talk [name] I can’t even look at you right now.” he states watching you walk out the front door.

You spent that evening mulling over all the times you and Tetsu had talked about the future. You recalled him mentioning Harvard and going to the US together. You couldn’t help but feel guilty for overriding his opinions. You had spent so little time together this year that you had forgotten. Laying in your bedroom staring at your ceiling your eyes started bristling with tears just waiting to fall. You felt so guilty for pushing him aside. For not communicating your thoughts and opinions. You loved him after all. Neither of you had ever said it, but you felt that you never had to say it. He must have known you loved him. While contemplating whether or not you were actually going to leave Miyagi your phone started ringing. It was Tetsu. You answered immediately and at first all you could hear was loud music in the background. A few seconds later you heard Tetsu talking into the phone. He was drunk and he had called you to pick him up. You spent 15 minutes trying to get a location out of him ignoring the lewd moaning in the background. Hanging up the phone you grabbed your parents car keys and threw your shoes on. Twenty minutes later you made your way to his most recent location. Weaving through the sweaty bodies you looked around trying to find his signature hairstyle. You walked up the stairs knocking on doors. You reached the last door on the left that was slightly open. 

Placing your hand on the door you push it open only to drop your keys at the sight of Kuroo, head back, mouth open. His pants are around his ankles and his hands are knotted in a strange girl's hair as she takes him into her mouth. “What the fuck Tetsu!” you screech at him. His eyes snap open, red from the alcohol he ingested before you got there. “Fuck, baby no!” he scrambles to pull his pants up as you grab your keys and make your way down the stairs. Rage and sadness fueling your feet to move to the car before letting your tears fall. He follows you stringing out half drunken apologies. “Baby, no...I’m sorry...fuck I’m sorry.” he sobs falling to his knees gripping the back of your knees as you stand in front of the drivers side door. “Fuck, I’m such a fuck up baby.” he sobs. You try to shake him off but he just grips you tighter. Sobs getting louder he pulls you closer. “Don’t leave me [name].” he begs into your thighs. “I know I’m a fuck up, but please...I can’t do this without you...I can’t have a future without you.” the crack in his voice ebbs your anger slightly. Turning you peer down at him and watch as the tears stream down his face. You sigh softly, and stroke his cheeks. “I can’t do this again Tetsu, I came because you called and that’s what I walked into?” you asked. Pushing his face into your thighs he squeezes softly. “I had too much to drink, I was upset because I want you to come to the US with me.” you stroke his hair softly as he continues to explain his reasonings. “I’m sorry I kicked you out earlier. And I’m sorry I said I didn’t support you.” He mumbles softly. “I want you to be happy, and if going to Miyagi is what makes you happy then...we can do the distance.” You pull him up and snuggle yourself into his chest. “Forgive me baby, I need you. You’re my best girl.” he smiles at you softly stroking your cheek. And with the soft smile you find yourself forgiving him once again.

@dabilove27

PART III|PART V

A/N: Angsty Angst >:]

[hermannsthumb]

"newt isn’t sleazy and is also too busy wrestling with the ethics of hitting on his hot TA if the guy is 5 months older than him to even notice" pleeeease write this

Anonymous asked: "When I Kissed the Teacher" AU ft professor newt and his hot 5-month-older TA hermann

and coincidentally, this older one

Anonymous asked: i just rewatched mamma mia 2 and was wondering if i could request a "when i kissed the teacher" newmann fic?? love your writing!!!!!!

Ask And Ye Shall Receive. sorry ive been MIA 😔 concept from this post I made earlier this month. idk what class newt teaches that hermann would be qualified to TA for but just like, decide for yourselves

---------------------

Newt’s never been a list-making kind of guy, or--for that matter--even really a planning ahead kind of guy, but certain circumstances have thrown his life more out of wack than usual lately, and he kind of needs the stability the like of things like lists offer. Desperate times and everything. Or, at the very least, Newt is desperate. 

So Newt plans, and plots, and deliberates, and he even agonizes a little, but most of all, he makes a list.

On one half of the page, he writes pros. On the other, he writes cons. On top, he writes--what else?--Hermann.

The problem started in late August. Newt knew for months he was going to be assigned a teaching assistant come that semester--it was him, after all, who’d suggested it to the dean in the first place--but the Hermann Gottlieb of extensive, impressive, overachieving CV and overly-former cover letter was a far cry from Hermann Gottlieb in the flesh. Newt expected a dork, frankly. Someone too socially awkward to feel brave enough to thank someone for holding a door open for him. He expected a PhD student so eager to please he’d cater to Newt’s every whim, whether it was grading horrendous freshman lab reports or fetching him a sandwich from the commissary between class sections. 

They met for the first time at the campus coffee shop. Hermann was dressed in an oversized pair of slacks, a threadbare green sweatervest, and honest-to-God saddle shoes; the buttons of his Oxford were done up all the way, from the collar to the cuffs, and an ornate cane was settled against his thigh. His haircut was tragic. “Dr. Geiszler,” he said, all clipped and English, and held his hand out to Newt. “Hermann Gottlieb. It is a great pleasure to meet you. I’m an admirer of your work.”

"Sup,” Newt said, and tried to bump their fists together.

Newt knew he was in deep shit then. It wasn’t just because Hermann was gorgeous (which he was, in a sort of weird, frumpy, ripped-outta-1945 way), or that the scowl he proceeded to level Newt with made his soul wither and his heart race a little bit too fast, but both of those things in conjunction with a big one: Newt was, and is, so fucking love-starved. It’s an unfortunate byproduct of being made a professor when he was as young as he was and completing a PhD before he completed puberty. His early twenties should’ve been spent dyeing his hair terrible colors and adding to his already impressive tattoo collection and having questionable hookups with other young twentysomethings; unfortunately, the only young twentysomethings Newt ever seems to come across are his students, and he has a very strict code of ethics. Not to mention it wasn’t like he was getting any action before that as a weird, gangly teenager with peers several years his senior. He was bound to latch onto the first genius hottie who crossed his path who wasn’t trying to flirt their way into bumping that B- to a B+. And better yet, Hermann is five whole months his senior!

The shit only got deeper when the semester started. No, Hermann was not the sort to fetch Newt sandwiches, or coffee, or Aspirin from his office, nor was he the sort to handle the dreaded lab reports (at least not unless Newt handled them with him), and he definitely wasn’t eager to please. Newt, anyway. If anything the opposite was true: he seemed to actively derive enjoyment from undermining Newt at every turn.

“Wrong,” he’d mutter during class if Newt screwed something up in a lecture, or “No, Geiszler, you’re doing it wrong again,” or “How in the blazes did you get three bloody PhDs when you can’t even do simple addition?” and snatch Newt’s dry erase marker away to scrawl his own answers on the whiteboard. It was less like having a TA and more like having...well, a bitchy, annoying co-teacher. Or, God help Newt, a colleague. And boy, did he wave those five months over Newt’s head like a fucking flag. Newt was immature; inexperienced; clearly not as serious about his studies--his completed studies--as Hermann. Meanwhile Newt’s class (bright young twenty somethings, taller than Newt, cooler than Newt, with more friends than Newt) would giggle and snicker, and Hermann would look smug.

It drove Newt fucking batty.

It also made him, like, super turned on.

The two can co-exist. Apparently. Hermann Gottlieb is already helping Newt discover new and existing concepts; what a fucking excellent TA he is. Someone give that man a raise.

So Newt draws up a list, and he writes Pros, and he writes Cons, and he writes Hermann. The pros are regrettably easy to come up with, because Hermann is Hermann, and (bitchiness and undermining of Newt aside) it’s unfair how many he has. Hot. Stupid sexy accent. Stupidly smart. This is crossed out and replaced with so smart he makes me feel stupid (in a good way), because it seems like an important distinction. Glasses on chain. Mysterious. (In a tall, dark, and handsome way. Sort of. Average height--which is tall to Newt, pale, and handsome. He still scowls more than he talks, which makes him feel mysterious. In a Bronte sort of way. Newt can picture Hermann drawing a billowing cloak around his shoulders and stalking some desolate moor in the moonlight, though in this case maybe’s more of a puffy parka than a cloak.) In tiniest font of all is makes me laugh, because Hermann does, goddamn it, with his snide asides and cutting remarks and sarcasm, often not even directed at Newt when it’s just the two of them alone in Newt’s office at night.

The placement of “is my TA” on the chart is acting as a particular annoyance to Newt, entirely on account of the fact that he can think of several pros and cons for that as well, and he’s not sure whether to nestle it between dark eyelashes and once called me a moron in front of my class and I got a hard-on or beneath sweaters smell like sweat and mothballs, has annoying tic of clearing throat when lost in thought, and the dick wins 86% of our arguments. Sexy forbidden fling. Abuse of power. Is older than me so it's not as weird as it could be? I’m his boss. The school’s paying Hermann though, not Newt, and it’s not like he’s going to scurry off to the dean and demand Hermann’s funding slashed if Hermann turns him down (which he’d most likely do). But it still feels like a breach of ethics.

On the other hand, Hermann is exactly the sort of guy he’d try to pick up at a bar if he still did things like that. (Tenure, rather than giving Newt breathing space to kick back and relax a little, has only increased his obsession with his work, and now when he gets a Friday night free to himself he mostly switches crap on the TV and falls asleep with his cat on the couch.) It’s about the experience, the impossible task of seducing someone who--by all accounts--is too straight-laced and tight-buttoned to indulge in something that debase. They were always the best in bed. Tension, Newt knows, has to snap at some point.

He’d like to wrap Hermann’s personal piano wire around his thumb and bang away at the keys until it snaps, too. Ethics, Newt thinks (folding up the list and stuffing it out of sight), his ass.

Newt sacrifices a Friday night with his cat and Unsolved Mysteries in favor of working on a solution to his Hermann Problem. Swamped with work, he tells Hermann over the phone, it fucking sucks, dude, I could really use your help in my office, and Hermann grumbles, and snaps that Newt should learn to be better prepared for his own damn classes, but declares he’ll be on campus in half an hour and that Newt will be ordering him takeaway for dinner as an apology.

The door swings open at half past five. Hermann is bundled in that heavy parka and scarf (which, even for a Boston November, still looks a little too warm), and his hair is damp. “Is it raining?” Newt says, perhaps stupidly, because there’s not a single droplet of water anywhere else on Hermann’s body.

Hermann makes a face at him and pushes the door shut with his cane. “No,” he says, tersely.

“Then why...” Newt touches his own hair.

“I was taking a bloody bath,” Hermann snaps. “I don’t work on Fridays, as you well know, Newton.”

The use of his full first name stings Newt oddly even as the notion of Hermann luxuriating in a bathtub excites him. “That’s Dr. Geiszler,” Newt snaps back, because goddamn it, he’s Hermann’s boss, he deserves respect, and then mentally adds a small, depressing tally to the Cons half of the board. Ethics, ethics. 

“Oh, I’m terribly sorry, Dr. Geiszler,” Hermann says. He throws his scarf and coat viciously at the small couch in the corner of Newt’s office, then takes his usual seat across from Newt. “Well? Where are those papers it’s so crucial we grade?”

Hermann in a bathtub, Newt thinks. Hermann naked. Papers, Newt thinks. “Papers,” Newt says, and he shoves a stack at Hermann with twice as much force as he means to, causing several to flutter to the ground. “We need...to grade them,” he says. Hermann naked, in a bathtub, maybe some candles lit around him, some nice music on, daydreaming about that wretched professor he works for. Damn it. “I have a pen,” he says. “To grade.”

“What on earth are you saying?” Hermann says. “Be quiet. I can’t concentrate with your abominable prattling on.” Then he mumbles something that sounds like incessant, rips the top paper off the stack, and begins to slash at it in red ink. He doesn’t bother gathering the two from the ground.

Why did Newt invite him here, again?

Oh, right. He pushes his glasses up his nose and feigns casualness, pulling out another paper for himself to grade. “A bath,” he says. “Just to, uh, relax? Or...?”

Hermann narrows his eyes. “Or?”

Newt shrugs. “It’s Friday. Were you getting ready for a date or something?”

This time, Hermann’s mouth twists down into a frown. Almost suspicious. “Why do you care?” he says.

“I don’t,” Newt says quickly. “Just making small talk.” God, he could picture some stud of a computer science PhD candidate winning Hermann over with techno babble--or maybe one of his fellow students, ugh, maybe they made a study group together that meets Friday nights, and Hermann was getting all gussied up, goddamn handsome astrophysics grad students--

“I was relaxing,” Hermann says. “You must be aware at this point you cause me a great deal of stress, Dr. Geiszler, on a daily basis.”

“Oh,” Newt says.

He gives up on the small talk after that. Hermann’s promised takeout arrives--a small carton of pad thai--as does Newt’s--a large carton of the spiciest thing they had on the menu--and they eat in silence. They have about three-quarters of the papers to go when Hermann suddenly sits back in his seat with a groan and rubs at his eyes under his granny glasses. “Bugger,” he says. “I can’t fathom this one for the life of me. I’m too tired.”

“It’s getting kinda late,” Newt agrees. “Maybe we should--”

“It’s not that,” Hermann says. “I had a glass of wine earlier, and--oh, it doesn’t matter. Your students need to learn how to write in a way that’s actually bloody legible--it’s like chicken scratch.”

Newt hops up and leans over his shoulder, squinting down at the page. Hermann’s hair smells nice, like something floral, and his skin has a small hint of what could almost be cologne. Why is Hermann wearing cologne? “Okay, let me see it,” Newt says, struggling to keep from getting lightheaded at the close proximity to Hermann. “I’m used to that kind of shit.”

“No,” Hermann says, drawing the paper close to his chest. “I am perfectly capable of managing it on my own.”

“Dude,” Newt says, “let me look at it, seriously. Hermann--”

He manages to tug it away from him. The handwriting is pretty bad, but the math seems to be worse. “Didn’t they do the readings?” Newt mutters under his breath. “That’s not even the right equation for the diameter. I gave them a cheat sheet, man.” They’re junior year engineering students--they should know this shit.

“I know what the equation is,” Hermann snaps. “I can grade it on my own. Give it back.”

“I didn’t say you didn’t know,” Newt says, “I said this kid--”

“It’s the radius squared--”

“Hermann, dude,” Newt says, “I know you’re--”

And that’s when Hermann grabs him by his skinny tie and kisses him, hard. 

They stare at each other afterwards. Hermann’s eyes are as wide as saucers; his mouth is hanging open. Newt’s tie slips from his fingers, which then fall limp to his lap. “Holy shit,” Newt squeaks.

Hermann is gone with a swish of his parka and a loud clack of his cane. And with a stack of papers Newt still has to somehow get through. Figures.

Their next few classes together are subdued. Hermann doesn’t interject any of his biting commentary or corrections, or even offer critiques of Newt’s lack of professionalism (when in the past his skinny jeans were such an easy target), and when the period is over, he practically sprints from the classroom before he and Newt can be alone together for even a second. It’s fine by Newt. Whatever. Maybe Hermann can get over it over Thanksgiving break, and Newt can try to get over the memory of Hermann’s strong fingers tugging him down, Hermann’s floral shampoo, Hermann’s chapped, wide lips against his, the little grunt of shock Hermann made as he did it, like he couldn’t believe his own audacity...

It’s not likely.

It’s December, the last week before finals, and Newt’s in his office bundled up in a sweatshirt (because the heat never seems to fucking work in here), revising a draft of an exam, and dreading the thought of trudging home in the snow, when there’s suddenly a knock at his door. Anticipating some overeager freshman here outside of office hours, he doesn’t look up as he says “Come in.”

A familiar clearing of a throat.

Newt shoots straight up to his feet. He knocks a mug of coffee to the floor in the process. “Hermann,” he says. “Uh. Hi. What--what are you doing here?”

Hermann shuts the door behind him, then takes a careful step forward. He’s back in his big dumb coat and big long scarf. “I thought I ought to tell you myself first,” he says, primly. “I’ve submitted a request to the dean to be reassigned to another professor next semester. Our research interests are far more in line, and I don’t imagine our personalities shall clash as much.”

“Oh,” Newt says, pretending his heart isn't sinking in his chest like a hunk of lead. Was he that bad of a kisser? He feels like he deserves a second shot at it--he wasn’t ready last time, you know, he bets he’d really wow Hermann if he had a fair heads up. “Are.. are those the only reasons why?”

“No,” Hermann admits. “They’re not.”

He crosses the room, and corners Newt against his desk before Newt even realizes what’s happening. “They’re not,” he says again, then adds in a murmur (lifting one hand to brush his fingers against Newt’s hair), “Dr. Geiszler.”

Neither of them talk much, after that.

[writing-for-me-at-this-point]

Hurt S/o! | Shikamaru + Kiba + Shino | ANGST + Fluff | HC’s

Request: This is my first request so please forgive and correct me if I do something wrong. I was wondering if you could maybe do an angsty headcanons for Shikimaru, Kiba, and Shino from Naruto’s reaction to their S/O getting seriously injured protecting them. If the S/O recovers or dies and the enemy is all up to you, I’ve just noticed a real lack in content for them and I’m craving it hard. Please and thank you!

Word Count: 1953 words

Page Count: 5.5 pages

A/N: i got so caught up in writing this it became way too long lmao. im sorry i forgot about naruto :( but i hope you do enjoy the rest! i made sure to end everything well. i have a shit ton of angst requests so i thought id leave this on a happier note :)

Tags: @bipolartryingtosurvive

Shikamaru Nara

- I could see this being during the Hidan fight.

- Hes set the plan in motion at that point.

- And you’re to make sure Hidan is distracted for the time being .

- Hidan may be an ass, but he isn’t dumb.

- He notices how you are keeping him from Shikamaru.

- Fucking LIVID

- You notice how hes shifting your fight closer to Shikamaru until he gets to the point where he definitely can get a deep slash into the Nara.

- You knew he was trying to get to him.

- You were fast, one of the fastest in the village, but that was because you were fairly weak when it came to strength.

- You tried to zip around, gaining speed and momentum, and within seconds- right when Hidan was going to bring his scythe down on Shikamarus neck, you slammed your body to his side.

- Shikamaru flew away as Hidan managed to get a large and deep slash into your body; you felt it start from under the right side of your ribs, curving across your stomach, and finally finished above your left knee.

- You didn’t feel it until you fell to the ground- shock really is a bitch.

- And then you felt the dull sting grow and blood dripped from the wound.

- The stinging grew into a pulsing and unbearable ache, and you knew for a fact he cut through each muscle in the way of his scythe, but your organs were nipped ( at best ) in the process.

- You couldn’t hear what was going on.

- You heard your heart beat in your ears, it was deafening, but you focused on your breathing and trying to keep calm.

- You trained for this- having a close friend beat your ass near death so you could focus on remaining in a state where you could prolong the inevitable.

- Yeah you thought of the most wild scenarios, and managed to prepare for them- turns out it worked out well.

- Once Hidan is buried Shikamaru went straight to you, managing to help out with Ino and Choji, stopping some of the bleeding while getting you to the village.

- You’re passed out at that point, so Ino cauterizes the wounds ends, the part under your ribs and the entire thigh.

- Shikamaru starts freaking at this point, he almost passes out, and Choji has to get his ass back together.   

- Once you get back to the village Tsunade is ready to go, with Sakura by her side your ass isn’t ending up on that stone.

- It takes about four hours to get you all settled, and into a private room, out of critical.

- He’d stay by your bedside, your hand in his till you woke up.

- “Shika…?”

- “Oh my gods, [ Y/n ]!”

- “Hi”

- Your soft giggles helped ease this poor boys heart.

- “You look awful.”

- “Don’t look too hot yourself.”

- “Wow. Okay.”

- “Get up here, you need some sleep. And don’t even deny it.”

- He took off the bulky clothes, only in his pants and tank top, climbing in next to you as you settled your head on his chest.

- “Thank you for taking care of me,”

- “Thank you for not dying.”

Kiba Inuzuka

- Being in Anbu had its ups and downs.

- But mostly downs.

- Okay. Only downs.

- But you managed to find your light, in a childhood friend and now lover.

- Though- he managed to act more like a puppy than a boyfriend at times.

- You didn’t mind though, and you lived your life peacefully after having to leave Anbu due to an injury that limited your eyesight greatly and it hindered all sight starting at arms length.

- Though, when in Anbu, its always- ALWAYS expected to have an old rival or two come back for more, even when one is retired.

- And here you were, walking through the forest with Kiba and Akamaru, talking about his past mission with Hinata and Shino.

- He got so excited to tell you that he didn’t notice the shift in scents in the air, and you couldn’t see ahead or through your peripheral.

- It happened so fast.

- Too fast.

- One second you were smiling with his arms around your waist, his chin on your head as you both laughed with Akamaru yipping.

- The next you were slipping from his arms, and blood was pooled at his arms, the slash at your neck was gruesome.

- Your hands went to your neck as Kiba yelled, Akamaru going after the person who came from the shadows.

- “No. No. No. No. No. No. [ Y/n ], NO!” He was panicking, picking you up quickly as a hand wrapped around your throat, gripping it so tightly you almost couldn’t breathe.

- Almost.

- You learned to stay calm in situations like this, and with Kiba’s harsh grip you didn’t have to waste any energy to help with the bleeding, so you focused on breathing and not getting your heart to pump too fast.

- “Tsunade! Fuck- get a medical nin! Now!”

- He yelled, running into the village again, where many were coming to help you out.

- Akamaru had come back by then, his mouth bloodied as well, but nothing else- indicating he got a good bite on the fucker.

- You made it to the hospital before you lost consciousness, making Kiba worry even more, because THAT was never a good sign.

- He had to be the one to lay you down on the table and his grip never wavered, getting into a sterile room and waiting for some instruction.

- He was freaking out inside, he wanted to cry and let go, just hold you- but you would die if any of that were to happen.

- He had to stay calm for you.

- He wasn’t going to let you die.

- The tell him to let go quickly and all hands go to your neck, working quickly to stop the bleeding, while a nurse came to get Kiba cleaned up and situated.

- His mom even came to help the boy, who looked dead while staring at your room, not even wanting to go in.

- “Boy." 

- Oh did she go off, telling him to go to his girlfriend and be a man.

- He did want to go, but he couldn’t help but feel so… helpless.

- "Helpless? Helpless! Boy, you do understand you just saved your girls life? That if you weren’t there she’d be laying there dead?”

- Kinda rocked his shit, but thanks mom.

- He went into your room alone first, your neck was bandaged and you looked pale, with blood and other IV fluids being attached to your arms.

- He noticed the especially dark bruise on your neck.

- It could have been either from his hand or the surgery, but he still felt bad.

- His mom came in and sat with him on the other side of you.

- They both held your hands and visited you till you woke up.

- “I lived bitch.”

Shino Aburame

- I honestly can’t see his S/o getting hurt so bad.

- Because when you think about it his bug control is OP AF.

- Like he can essentially control you with a bug.

- I would go with someone would be after him, but since they can’t get to Shino- you would be the best option.

- Get hurt him physically so lets do it mentally and emotionally :)

- Poor boy

- I could see this being when your both adults, and teaching the younger generations, including your kids :)

- And you’re chilling on your house rooftop, that you’ve decorated with couches and tables and such, even hanging lights around.

- You had Shino build a retractable sliding glass on top in case it rains.

- If you’re having trouble imagining this- think Fast and Furious ending where everyone is eating dinner together.

- Yeah that’s ya’ll with the rest of the group :)

- You’re relaxing, reading a book and curled into the couch and drinking some tea or coffee or hot cocoa ( THEY’RE ALL VALID ) 

- You had gotten up a second to go to the large chest you had near one of the tables, to pick out a fluffy blanket.

- You never noticed how someone had mixed a poison into your drink, because they were gone before you could even decide on a blanket.

- Your kids would have been home soon, and they knew you liked to hang out up here, especially Shino since he kept the bees up here.

- You settled down and read some more, before taking sips of your drink.

- You noticed it tasted weird, and you had gotten up to check it out you felt your head get light, and your throat was stinging- making you cough horribly.

- You honestly felt like death was coming for you, and you knew something was wrong, but by the time you had gotten to the door you fell down and struggled to breathe.

- “Hey mom, Aponi kicked me-”

- “Shut up! Adonis don’t be- Mom!”

- “Mom?!”

- Your kids started freaking out, with your little girl noticing how strange you looked and saw the cup that was broken at your side.

- “Addy! Get dad! Mom drank something!”

- “Alright! Stay there- I’ll be back!”

- They managed to get their dad and Uncle Kiba, with Aponi looking to the cup- having some of her bugs recognize what was in it.

- “Dad! Its Saifu Ants! Someone poisoned mom with Saifu ants!”

- Shino had gotten some for himself and used their toxins to create an antidote.

- You were currently at the hospital, and declining rapidly, stressing out everyone around you.

- Even Naruto came and the dude is Hokage and is busy as hell.

- “You should all be prepared for the worst.”

- Everyone’s hearts dropped, and Shino couldn’t be there- he was helping making the antidote.

- It took about 20 more minutes until Shino came rushing in with it.

- Everyone made their way to your room and god.

- You were so pale, you honestly looked dead. Your kids only knew you were alive due to the heart monitor and your weak chalkra signature, your breathing was supported by a machine and even then your lungs sounded horrible.

- God Shino worked as hard as he could so fast.

- He felt like his heart stopped, that everything was moving too fast for him and he was going to pass out.

- Thank god his eyes were covered cause he had tears in them the entire time.

- He felt his soul ripping apart, what would he do if you left him so soon? The kids?

- You had gotten the antidote in time- but not before the poison had it’s time with you.

- Your lungs were destroyed and your heart was weak, your muscle was torn down.

- But you made it back to them.

- Everyone held a sigh of relief.

- You were a little off at first- still sleepy and slurring.

- After a few month you were able to leave- with everyone visiting you in the meantime with what had been going on in the village.

- Once you made it home you collapsed on your bed with Shino, easing his heart just a bit.

- Your kids jumped in too, snuggling up to both of you, with Aponi on your chest and Adonis on your stomach.

- “You scared us. Please, don’t do that again.”

- “It’s okay. I told you. You can’t get rid of me that easy.”

- “Like I’d want to.”

[veeranger]

Thoughts on Halo Reach's plot and best to worst noble team members?

you know ive actually been a lot more critical towards reach lately because i think it fails on the biggest thing it advertised: noble team. characters have never really been the strong suit of bungie’s writing (idk who destiny is so dont @ me) and while this isnt usually a major issue, it is an issue when a game wants to sell you on this squad of your teammates it wants you to care about or at least be fond of. ODST and Reach both have a cast of characters that could be really interesting but since halo is a shooter and not really a storytelling kinda game series all they really get are a few lines here and there and some cool moments, nothing really solid or anything to get a glimpse at who they are. maybe thats kinda the point though since spartans are all fucked up broken people like inherently. i dont think thats why bungie did that though

as for reach’s actual plot, i think it works well for what it is, a playable tragedy that tells you the conclusion up front. halo fans who are any level above completely casual knew that reach got completely glassed right before the start of halo ce and the advertising of this was very clear. the fact that you’ve never heard of spartan 3′s or noble team before was a pretty clear indicator of what their fates would be before you even turned on your xbox. the game literally opens with your smashed helmet embedded in the ground as a tombstone to your inevitable heroic sacrifice. reach invokes the same kind of feeling as star wars rogue one, you just know things wont end well for our main characters but you know that their deaths will pave the way for the main series protagonist to eventually win the whole damn thing 3 games/movies from now. 

so even with this in mind you go through reach and you think “wow things are going pretty well, we’re holding out own against the covies and even striking back at key targets” and maybe you forget whats going to happen or you dont and you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop. and boy fucking howdy does it drop. jorge dies thinking he just saved reach and as you fall through the atmosphere you realize how hopelessly fucked you are. thats where the game enters its second phase, the “we’re fucked but still fighting” phase, as opposed to the first half of the game where things were still somewhat hopeful. noble six wakes up like a week later to half the planet burning and civilians being slaughtered as they try to evac. the first level of the second half of the game features you busting your ass hard to clear an evac point for civilians only to see them all get shot down and die. its brutal stuff, especially for halo who had never shown the conflict though that lense. 

what follows is a parade of squadmate deaths as your numbers dwindle with every level until its just you and emile, and then just you. unlike in rogue one you actually aren’t immediately told what the key item in this quest is, in this case its cortana, the equivalent to the death star plans in rogue one, the most important thing in the universe since cortana will be the one to slipspace jump to halo 04 and kick off a series of events that will lead to the survival of humanity. but once you get this item suddenly it all makes sense, carter is told this is “what his spartans died for” and to you that means a lot more than it ever would to him. 

reach ends with a profoundly impactful epilogue level where you just. are doomed. you can’t hold out forever and even if you could there’s no rescue coming for you. noble six gave their life to save the universe and never even knew it. the fact that their death isnt a cutscene but you actually yourself have to try to stave off death or just take as many elites with you as you can before they get you, it really adds so much to the impact of the final noble team death. nevermind that six isnt a real character it does work in this case because you’re seeing it from a first person perspective.

so overall my thoughts on reach is that despite the major flaw of not making you care enough about noble team (unless you do, this is my personal view) it does its job very well in portraying the desperate struggle of humanity against a threat that they cannot possibly comprehend or rightfully stand up against, but despite devastating loss the small victories they achieved still ended up mattering in the end. 

now as for noble team i wont do a best to worst but ill give my thoughts on everyone

carter: hardass commander type, not much to say imo. his death scene was his best moment and i wish his relationship with kat had been fleshed out more because it was so so funny to see her pull his strings to get what she wants. you can tell he has the respect of everyone, especially emile. 

kat: the only girl! i actually like cat, im glad they gave her a buzzcut instead of trying to make her sexy or anything even if they did give her that ass in her armor. shes the typical smartass better than you genius character but it works, especially with that accent. i wish i could be friends with her, there was that scene right before she died where she confided in six that this was also her first glassing. her death was kind of shock value to me and i wish she could have at least died with a little more dignity like the rest of noble team but alas :(

jun: probably my least favorite. i cant really remember much of this guy. he’s the only one who got to live and i kind of hate him for that because he was the least interesting of the bunch. 

emile: certainly the most iconic of all the noble spartans. he comes off as sadistic but not a maniac, he listens to carter when he speaks and is on good terms with kat even through his obvious inability to really connect to other people. this is certainly because of the fact that he’s a spartan-3, he’s probably the most “inhuman” of the bunch. i wish his relationship with jorge was given a little more, i liked how despite his pushing jorge early in the game he still mourned his death, and yet refused to carry his dogtags because he knew six was the one who was entrusted with them. his death was very iconic i think everyone remembers that. 

jorge: the big man himself, his death is what set the tone for the second half of the game and was probably pretty impactful to most people playing. i always thought it was interesting that he was a spartan-2 and not a 3 like the rest of noble, i wonder why that was. his relationship with halsey was interesting and it showed that not all spartans hated the devil woman for what she did to them. his defining characteristic was his big heart and that was especially interesting for a spartan-2, that he managed to hold onto something like that through all the shit he probably went through. 

[briefololtragedy]

Something to Stay Part 4

Sakura X Itachi

Prequel to Say anything

Itachi doesn’t like being called Uchiha-san.

Rating G

Call me by my name

It was 4:55 when Sakura rushed into the locker room to change into her scrubs for the day. She was always at least 15 minutes early, but this morning it was hard to get up. Sasuke had so many questions and worry for his brother, by the time she go to answering all of then it after 11pm and she wanted to crash into bed, which she did the moment she got home. Shower be damned!

Her alarm woke her from sleep at 430, apparently she snoozed it at 4am. Next thing she knew she bolted out of the bed, almost tripped on her bedding that was now on the floor of her bedroom. When she says almost tripped, she means full on face plant to the floor. A quick shower to wash of the hospital grim just for it to be replaced by a new layer. There was no time to dry her hair, which she put into a quick messy bun. Looking in the mirror after throwing on a simple pair of skinny jeans and oversized T-shirt with a bowl of ramen on it, she noticed the bumps on her face and the slight break out she has gotten due wearing surgical mask so long yesterday and only eating cookies. Looking at her watch, it was 445, the time she normally got to work. She grabbed her Toms and ran out the door.

Sakura made it to handoff just as the clock hanged to 5. Kabuto looked smug. “You look like a walking disaster this morning. Try to put yourself together before seeing patients. We don’t want you giving them a heart attack with how dreadful you look.”

Sakura found herself having to count to 10. She could not punch Kabuto, in the face multiple times, it would be unprofessional. She was sure he was upset with her getting to assist yesterday. They had 20 patients to cover. Kabuto took 4 and split the rest between her and the other intern. Anticipation and worry came to her briefly, knowing that she would have to take care of Itachi. She hoped Sasuke and his parents got what ever peaceful rest they could obtain. She heard the nurses complaining how Fugaku demanded them be able to stay past visiting hours to see that Itachi’s needs were being meet. She planned to pre-round on him last, so she could make a quick escape to meet before the formal rounds with Dr. Senju.

She finished going through the charts of her other patients in record time and able to quickly examine them with no problems. She had a couple appendectomies, cholecystectomies, and hernia repairs. She had one hernia repair who tried to get a little to handsy when she was examining his abdomen. Sakura made a mental note to have a nurse with her the next time she had to be in the room with him.

She had 20 minutes before she had to meet with her team. She planned on taking 5-10 minutes to quickly check on Itachi and then get coffee. She already downed her first cup when she was sitting in front of her computer. Sakura also didn’t care to fix her appearance, aside from her dark circles, she looked presentable. She wasn’t here to appeal to the male sex, she wanted to learn and follow in the footsteps of Dr. Senju.

Hana quickly gave her a report on how Itachi was doing. He had woken up in the middle of the night and went back to sleep after some pain medication was given. His family had left before he fell asleep, which came to be a relief for the nurses working. He was still resting this morning.

Sakura took a deep breath, gently knocked on his door. Hearing no response, which she expected, she entered.

Many years have gone by since she last saw the oldest son of Mikoto and Fugaku. From what she remembers when she was 11, he was a tall, dark, intimidating force. He once snuck her some dango that Sasuke didn’t want following her punching him in the face. His parents weren’t happy with her. She had ran off into their gardens after the incident.

This man laying on the bed sleeping was not the picture that she carried with her all these years. He looked paler than normal, his lines under his eyes were more pronounced, IVs in both his arms, and the IV poll on his right side. His heart tracing looked steady, no arrhythmias. Oxygen saturation was perfect. His breathing pattern and heart rate on the lower side confirmed he was in a deep sleep.

“Uchiha-san, its Dr. Haruno. I will be taking a quick listen to you and then will want to look at your surgical incision.” She had placed on her hand on his left arm, gently trying to get him to stir. She then went about assessing him this morning.

It was now time to look at his incision and knew she would have to be more forceful when trying to get him awake. He started to stir.

“Uchiha-san, its Dr. Haruno. I am just going to check your abdomen quickly to make sure everything is ok. How is your pain?” Those words brought Itachi out of his dream world and as he opened his eyes he was met with the most color he has ever seen, bright pink and emerald. He was once again reminded of a cherry blossom field.

As his eyes started to focus more he was met with Sakura. Gone was the scrawny little thing, and now before him stood a grown women. She still had delicate features, gone was the baby fat of her face. Her hair was on the top of her head in a bun. No makeup on her face, which was a breath of fresh air compared to the other women he has come across over the years.

“I will need to bring your covers down to get access to your bandages, is that ok?” Her eyes were warm and welcoming. She had a comforting hand on his shoulder.

He didn’t answer her right away, but went to slowly push his blankets down. The slight crunch he did caused pain to shoot through his abdomen.

“Uchiha-san you should let me do that for you. It wasn’t even 24 hours ago that you have an intense surgery. I will let nurse Hana now that you will need one of your as needed pain medications.” Her voice was smooth like honey.

He didn’t even notice as she removed the bandages on his abdomen and inspected the site. She worked quickly and professionally. After she was done looking she redid his bandages with fresh gaze and tape.

“Do you need anything else Uchiha-san?” He didn’t know why she was acting so formal with him, but he could understand it. They hadn’t seen each other in years, she wasn’t even a teenager the last time they met. He couldn’t remember ever holding an actual conversation with her.

“No Dr. Haruno. Have you heard from Sasuke any?” He couldn’t help but ask.

“I haven’t heard from him since last night. Hopefully he is getting some rest along with your parents, all of you have been through a lot. I almost thought you wouldn’t remember I'm friends with Sasuke.” She had a slight smile on her face. She was staring at him and it was then that he realized it was because he hadn’t said anything in reply. Itachi got caught up staring at her eyes, those dazzling emeralds.

“Sasuke talks about you and Naruto, well as much as someone like him can… Would it be possible to get something to drink? My throat feels raw.” He had to kick himself for asking her about the drink, he was an absolute idiot.

“Of course. I’ll see if one of the nursing students can bring you something. They are pretty good at checking in on patients and helping out. Dr. Senju and the team will be around later, get some rest Uchiha-san.” Sakura had brought his covers up to his chest and walked out the door. For some reason her saying Uchiha-san didn’t sit well with him.

A few minutes later he was brought multiple cups of water and students more then welling to help him. it was when his nurse came in with some pain medication that they were shooed away.

Itachi didn’t know what to do with himself now. When was the last time he was idle for so long.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Sakura made it just in time to get a new cup of coffee before starting rounds with Dr. Senju. It was hard keeping an indifferent face when talking with Itachi. She couldn’t help as she acknowledged how attractive he was, but she wasn’t an airhead preteen anymore. She was able to separate work and her personal life. While Itachi muddied the water some, she would be professional with him and his family when they came into the hospital.

A proud smirk made its way onto her lips as she brought up her coffee cup to her mouth. She had beat Kabuto and the other intern to the meeting spot. She only had to make it though 3 more days until she had a day off. Sunday would be a glorious day!

Jin was the second to arrive, he was one in her first year class. He stood a head and half taller then her, he had an average build, his coloring was brown hair and brown eyes. Unlike her, he had a tan to his skin. He was doing a trauma rotation, but belonged to the orthopedic surgery program.

“ Wonder where Yakushi is? I heard you got to scrub into that surgery yesterday with Dr. Senju, man is she scary! “ She couldn’t help but be irritated by his voice, it wasn’t his fault that she was having the start of a migraine.

“He should be here soon, maybe he heard about a new case for the day.” It was unlike Kabuto to not have arrived by now. At times Wednesday could be a slow day compared to the other days of the week. Starting Friday - Monday you would get the reckless injuries that were brought about by too much drinking and wanting to have a good time. A couple of weeks ago it was a party boat that capsized when too many people were on it.

“Where is Yakushi? I’m ready to round, it was a long ass day yesterday. “ Dr. Senju came up, tea in hand. She was not Kabuto’s biggest fan to start and him not being here was not a way to get off her bad side.

“Dr. Senju, sorry to interrupt but Dr. Yakushi was pulled into a surgery with Dr. Orochimaru.” It looked like the nurses had sacrificed one of the nursing student’s to deliver the message. Sakura didn’t know the name of the poor girl, but could see her shaking.

A grumble came form Dr. Senju, her lips pressed together. “ Let get started. I take it you two are carrying the majority of the patients anyway. We will round on them and then you two can finish charting. You two will be up for first assist on the next surgery. Decide among the two of you who will take it when it comes.” She then started walking down the halls.

Rounds were lightening fast. It was decided that Jin would take the first surgery of the day since Sakura got the one yesterday. Jin vanished to do his work, while Sakura took to sitting at one of the empty computers at the nursing station. The gossip from the nurses would put Ino to shame. ‘notes and then lunch.’

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

“Shisui leave Sasuke alone. “ How many times did Itachi have to stop those two. Sasuke had gotten back at Shisui for giving his cell number to some of the nurses. Sasuke’s phone wouldn’t stop going off. In retribution apparently Shisui’s Instagram was hacked and was announced that he was undergoing treatment for multiple STDs, his prior conquests were not to happy about the announcement.

Shisui had come with food from Mikoto. Sadly he was unable to eat it due to being on clear liquids. The aroma itself was making Itachi’s mouth water. Itachi refused to let either Sasuke or Shisui eat his food and made them put it in the mini fridge in his room.

“I heard you have little Sakura-chan overseeing you. Aren’t you a lucky dog. Sasuke I don’t know how the two of you never got together even for a night.” Sasuke looked ready to attack. Itachi wasn’t aware that his cousin knew Sakura. Shisui initially worked for the family law firm, but then branched off with itachi to do pro-bono work. He typically got in later then Itachi and stayed to close up the office, where Itachi opened it. Shisui had guilt from not being to the office sooner he may have been able to prevent itachi getting shot.

“Uchiha-san I have come to check on you quickly. Sasuke-kun said that you may be in pain.” Sakura was at the door, her presence stopping the inevitable match between Sasuke and Shisui.

Sasuke looked annoyed and Shisui straightened up. Itachi could already tell Shisui was putting his best flirting face on. “Sakura-chan I have to ask if it hurt?” Sakura looked at Shisui annoyance spreading on her face.

“Shisui we have had this conversation before and I’m not currently in the mood to put up with your ridiculous pick up lines.” Sasuke was annoyed he knew his cousin was doing this to get on his nerves. He and Naruto made it their mission to make sure the guys wanting to date Sakura where fully screened, much to the annoyance of Sakura. She had to keep most of her relationships a secret, unless they were creeps. The creeps she held no remorse for when the two idiots chased them away. Just because they watched out for her didn't protect her from having her heart broken a few times, before she decided to focus solely on her training.

“Come on lets go find something to eat since Weasel here wont share his food.” It was then that Sasuke’s stomach started to grumble, he was in agreement to finding food and some tomato juice.

 After dumb and dumber left Sakura was able to speak to Itachi. “Uchiha-san I know you have been having increased pain and wanted to make sure you were doing ok. Is there anything that you need? “

“Why do you call be Uchiha-san? “ Itachi blamed it on his pain medications for having no filter.

“What am I supposed to call you? I think Shisui has dibs on Weasel. “ she looked playful, mischievous look behind her eyes. It reminded itachi of the little girl he remembered from another time it seemed.

“I would like it for you to call me by my name Dr. Haruno. I feel like my father should be in the room when you say Uchiha-san. “ Sakura couldn’t imagine anyone calling Fugaku by anything other than Uchiha-sama. His face would probably get as red of the tomatoes that Sasuke adores so much in anger.

“Itachi-san considering you are older than me doesn’t that make you an old man?” Before Itachi could reply Sakura’s stomach decided to interrupt their conversation.

‘I forgot to eat lunch again! Two appendectomies came in that Jin and her split, which was around lunch time.’ Sakura couldn’t help but be embarrassed.

“Excuse me Itachi-san, but I will leave you to get some more rest.” Itachi didn’t want her to leave. She was a breath of spring in the shade of beige room.

“My mother made me a bento and my doctor has decided to only let me have liquids. I don’t think she would mind me giving it to you.”

Sakura was speechless. Mikoto’s food was a precious commodity, one that Sasuke refused to let anyone have. “I can get some food in the cafeteria, that was made for you and I’m sure you would like to have it once you are cleared for a regular diet.”

“I’m sure my mother would make me a new one when the time comes. This one hasn’t been in the fridge long and will still be fresh. I insist that you take it. Although I do ask that you enjoy it here as a way to repay me. I could use company that doesn’t want to punch the other person in the face.”

“Well that’s an offer I can’t refuse.” This meal would be the first of many, neither of them knowing that at the time.

[cupcakemolotov]

Scatter the Die

I was originally just going to reblog my old post but I couldn’t find it and I decided that I couldn’t be bothered to keep digging for it. I decided to pull a lalainajanes and update/edit/re-post a thing to see if it will get me off my ass to finish the sequel. Also, I apologize, because I’m pretty sure I’ve changed the title of this thing twice now so oops.

You can find it here on A03 if you prefer.

Caroline shivered beneath the blankets she'd been tucked into, thankful that the bone jarring shakes were finally easing. One of the disapproving medics had surprised her clothing change and trussed her up like a thanksgiving turkey, but she’d been cleared from taking a ride to the hospital. A warming IV did not sound like a fun way to spend the rest of her day, and the last thing she’d have expected was to brush off her was hypothermia training in New Orleans of all places.

Magic had changed a lot of things over the decades, but the last few years had been particularly difficult. The veil was thinning and monsters sometimes wore human faces. Humanity sat poised on another apocalyptic event, and they fought it one case at a time.

Today wasn’t likely her last brush with death.

But her own state of well being wasn’t her highest priority. All around her cops and feds scrambled to collect evidence, trash bags and waiters being handed as they worked against the clock. The evidence was disappearing with the muddy rain, and once gone, they’d have no chance to collect it.

They owed the dead cops more than that.

Mouth tightening, Caroline watched the other ambulance pull out, it’s lights flashing as it’s wheels hit pavement. To lose a rookie on his first day in Homicide would be a kick in the gut for the department that was already reeling from two deaths. She could only hope he pulled through.

Goddammit.

Two weeks ago, what should have been an open and shut suicide had turned into a horror movie gone bad. What lived behind the veil was hungry and angry. Assuming her department was allowed to keep so much as a paper lip attached to the files of this one, explaining the deaths to the grieving families wouldn’t be easy. There was no right when nightmares gorged.

Oh, the Feds would make all the right noises at there having been a cop-killing Fae running loose and offer little else. It was why she’d taken to making two set of notes. So that when her case file disappeared she’d still have her back up files. But in this case, even if the Feds did make an evidence grab, at least they knew the murderer was dead.

She’d seen to that much.

"Detective?"

Caroline bit the side of her cheek at the familiar voice, glancing over to find Special Agent Mikaelson walking towards her. In his hands was a steaming takeout cup, and his jaw was set at an angle so rigid she wondered how he hadn’t cracked teeth. He wasn't wearing a coat in respect to the drizzle, and his curls looked riotous. For a moment they stared at each other before he offered her the cup.

Wary, she wiggled a hand free, and was amused to discover it was hot chocolate. Taking a careful sip, she tipped her head. "Agent?”

He leaned against the side of the ambulance with eyes that were once again dark with things she'd no intention of reading. "I've been told to keep this short."

"Elena can be fierce," Caroline murmured as she glanced over at the brunette EMT who was assessing another injury. "But she means well."

"Friends?"

She shrugged. "It never hurts to make them."

A quirk of his lips at the slight accusation in her voice. He didn't look at all bothered by her jab. She might have admired his thick skin, but it honestly just made her want to punch him in his perfect teeth.

"I owe you an apology."

She paused, the drink inches from her mouth and studied the lines of his face, both brows arching. "For what exactly? I have a list, if that’d be helpful.”

A hint of a dimple before he slipped one hand into his pocket, face sobering. "You make a habit to carry cold iron with you, Detective?"

The knife was an old safety blanket, born from teenage years spent knowing that a fae nightmare had killed her mother. Years later, the truth might have freed that particular fae from its fate, but Caroline had stopped feeling comfortable without cold iron around her.

Special Agent Mikaelson from the FBI Department of Weird didn't need to know that.

"My captain encourages police officers to carry iron, Agent. Shall I dig out my handbook?"

A flicker of something bright slipped along his pupil, and Caroline tilted her head, gaze narrowing. She knew what magic looked like. Until that moment, she'd have sworn Mikaelson was human. A complete ass, but human. Now, she wasn't so sure.

"That knife wasn't department issued," Mikaelson said with a hint of a blade in his voice.

"I'm sorry," Caroline said serenely after she took a slow sip of her drink. It was really good hot chocolate. She wondered where he'd gotten it. "Where exactly is this apology?"

His eyes were calculating, as he studied her. Those disgustingly long lashes lowered to hide his gaze, and when they lifted, his pupils were golden. The blue of his iris had narrowed to a thin band, and the color had changed to something several shades brighter. It was like looking at the heart of a star.

But other than those eyes, he somehow managed to appear completely human.

Her mouth ran dry.

"We underestimated her," Klaus said and the crisp tones of his accent had sharpened a hair. "Fortunately, it appears that you were also underestimated, and that was a lucky break. My sincere apologies, Detective Forbes, that you were pulled into a situation you shouldn't have had to deal with."

Something about his tone irritated her, and she concentrated on that instead of how she could almost feel his words on her skin. Taking a careful, deliberate sip of her drink, Caroline forced herself to hold his gaze.

"I'm a cop," she said bluntly. She didn't back down from his gaze, even when the tilting of his head wasn't quite… right. "It's my job to deal with the unexpected. How long have you know what we were hunting was a she and what it could do, Agent?"

He long had he known that this… woman could drown someone when they were standing between four walls? Caroline was certain she'd dream of screaming, the saltwater scent and the taste of brine in her mouth. The monster who'd had no face that Caroline could describe with words, she'd had no interest in another woman. The rage, the worst of the water had been used to attack the men who'd stood around her as they'd examined the scene. Surprise had been the only reason Caroline had won, surprise and an old, old habit.

Watching the life go out of a nightmare was no easier than watching a human die.

Those glittering eyes studied her. "I'm afraid that's classified."

"Is it now," Caroline said slowly, a hint of drawl elongating her vowels.

"You're a bit of an enigma, Detective," Mikaelson said, the calculation in his gaze turning to iron she recognized. "Your mother murdered; yet, you worked to clear her supposed murderer's name. You’ve filed a number of complaints with the local bureau when they couldn't produce information on a number of supernatural killers."

"Families deserve the truth," she said stiffly. "They also deserve to know what justice has been given. It's not that difficult a concept."

"Sometimes, truth isn't the right answer."

Caroline tossed the last of the hot chocolate on the ground and stood, unwrapping herself from the blankets. The oversized clothing was a little ridiculous and her hair was a tangled mess scraped into a wet bun, but right then she couldn't care. Pasting on a fake smile, she hoisted the ends of her pants so she wouldn't trip. "Yeah, well, in that case, why don't you shove that apology up your ass."

His brow arched. She didn't like how much taller her was than her when he straightened, and she lifted her chin to scowl when he stepped into her space. "Regardless, the bureau will extend its apologies to you and your precinct."

Her teeth ground together. "So that's it?"

"The case is closed."

"Oh yeah? Care to tell me what the motive was exactly?" Caroline asked. “Or why she picked men. Cops. People I worked with.”

"I'm afraid that's classified as well," Mikaelson said.

"Donovan has a daughter," she said carefully. “They all had families.”

Those burning eyes softened a hair. "The loss of any life is always a regret."

Caroline showed him the edge of her teeth. "And this mythical apology of yours. Will it include using cops as bait?"

The smile wiped from his face and his chin lowered, so they were nearly eye to eye. It struck her again, how pretty he was, with his scruffy jaw and burning eyes. His magic should have frightened her, but all it did was piss her off. He'd had this magic and she'd almost drowned.

He was such a dick.

"Is that what you believe happened?"

Of course that was what happened. Mikaelson was obviously not human, and Caroline had seen this kind of maneuvering before, when her mother had been killed. Had seen good and honest men, used as easily discarded chess pieces. She wasn't stupid and she resented that he thought she was but this was also not a battle she could win. Not today. But maybe tomorrow.

So instead of picking the fight she really wanted, she shrugged. “Are you saying you weren't using us?”

"Be very careful, Forbes," Mikaelson warned, gaze tracking a curl as it tumbled across her cheek, the wild colors in his gaze shifted like tectonic plates. "There are things in this world you don't want to engage."

Caroline wasn't sure if he referencing himself or whatever had happened to fellow cops. Not that it mattered. When had she ever let something stop her from getting answers for the families who'd had a loved one stolen? Knowing that a killer was dead meant nothing if you couldn't grasp why.

She knew that sometimes there was no good answer. This wasn't one of those times. Still, she'd no reason to tell Special Agent Klaus Mikaelson that, did she?

"I'm just a murder cop."

Mikaelson laughed. Deep and rich, dimples flashing, he watched her as the gold and wild blue faded from his eyes. "It'd be easier if you were, Forbes."

It was on the tip of her tongue, to ask him what he was. What caused eyes to shift to molten heat that way, while the rest of them remained normal. What kind of power did he have? But she sensed a trap there, saw him waiting and refused to give him the satisfaction.

Bonnie might know, anyway.

"Apparently your case is closed," Caroline said with sugary sweetness as she shifted to walk away. "So, here's to hoping I never see you again."

"I don't believe it will be quite that simple, Detective," Mikaelson said softly, voice laced with warning as she moved towards the squad cars.

She rather thought it was.

Three days later, when her Captain brought up that the FBI were digging through her old cases, she was irritated. When the official letter offering her a both an apology as well as position showed up, she dug up the card that had been left on her desk and the number she refused to input into her phone.  She never replied to the Bureau directly, but she did send a single text with a picture of a letter on fire.

The response had left her grinding her teeth.

Some things are inevitable, love.

[macklives]

homestuck recap

i hated this so fucking much bc my 2 am bitch-ass didnt want to read a recap thats probably longer than any slowburn out there

anyways here it is

also, uhhH sorry im using this as a end of session discussion bc that shit gets explained in her as well. and im not writing up more recaps of a recap so this is where im done for the day. (by done for the day i mean last nights session, im still doing a liveblog soon. i just wrote this yesterday)

also that this is long

you dont have to read it, theres nothing of importance

ive been coping with humor to get me through it

neato.

have fun with what i suffered through:

why was “beta” the only thing unhighlighted?

like did i miss a page???

OH its the beta version of HS thats why

damn its like 5 pages and thats it

mmh

well youll all be happy to know im clicking every single one of these links again bc i like looking back like ahh i remember that. good times. also in case i forgot some shit existed.

do you think andrew had fun writing this? or was he like “fuck”

thats a lot of fucking package talk. good thing im not confused as of now and remember it pretty clearly. of else, this early on in the recap, id be screwed.

god remember when i did an analysis on each item and what it did

i feel as if i have the technology engrained inside my head right now

cruxite, alchemeter, all that jazz

flashbacks are starting up already

yeah, that was the good part in homestuck where i knew 100% that i probably would continue on this liveblog in its entirety, ngl

that one explosion scene. bc it kept me going.

OH W A IT SHIT

i just realized how the intermission spades probably fucking foreshadowed the whole jack revolts thing and gains the ring, which was also technically JOHNS fault considering he slashed up the doll in the first place

my god, i guess thats the only good aspect of the recap. looking back at things and realizing the missing pieces.

oh that makes sense for the whole “this prototyping had no effect on the enemies, since he was already in the medium” i didnt actually think about that

little did rose know where that would get her right now

oh yeah

there’s still the whole entire lab terminal thing and how mom basically knows the place exists. i guess we’re still venturing onto that and itll come up later when we find out how mom knows SO MUCH about the game.

still think shes some weird spy or secret agent

i kinda love her ngl

anyways, theres literally no reason for skaia to produce a cloning machine. so technically, they only sent the meteors in, right? so who put the cloning machine in if not mom?

oh yeah that impact was nerve wrecking asf

and still at this point in the comic i called dave fuckboy red

huh, how times change

i hated reading that whole paragraph ngl, the frustration just kicked me in the boobs again

yeah nobody else got tornadoes, huh?

OH that makes also much more sense

bc she did prototyped them before she entered the medium.

i gotcha

man one of my favorite edits i made, rose hitting that meteor with a bat

are you

telling me

the exiles structures they arrived on were in the form of the items the kids used to enter the medium?

THE EGG

THAT EXPLAINS “EGG”

of course it was 413 years ago. that was never explained. simply vague “many years in the future....” but i expected no less from this

man serenity is the most wholesome character in hs no doubt

damn thought andy here was really gonna spoil us jade’s planet

okay cool, im glad i now have the layout to the whole “their stations went to the coordinates of the home button” shindig

man i honestly dont know what else to say besides “yeah cool recap” when i already pretty much know what went down? ofc im looking into each link and shit and adding in things when i see fit, but otherwise its just me going “ah good times” yknow

the whole meteor thing kinda makes sense now?

we’re still missing a few pieces of info but we’re getting there, folks

oh yeah that reveal

god jade and dave have it in the shits for parents huh

bro isnt the best and jade has a fucking dog

who lowkey

is doing better than bro

who knew a fucking dog is a better guardian than bro lmfao

dreambot = terminator. im telling you.

sorry im still on that idea and it will never leave unless i have the actual proof in front of me that its not going to become a thing. meaning, ive finished hs and theres still no terminator dreambot or either andrew himself gives me a canon letter with “the robot is not arnold, mackenzie, pls just let it be”

why is the entire game session highlighted

i swear to god if this is like to a second recap or smth of the whole game session i may fucking CRY

okay thank god its just a design of the skaia layout

which is honestly cool

idk why its blurry tho but i can at least see the layout now. which is honestly how i pictured it anyways.

yeah, john did make a huge impact in his friends’ life and i find that so fucking touching

yep. got that. everything loops around. cool.

especially when the trolls come in. god we havent even gotten to that recap portion yet, we havent even gotten to the INTERMISSION

pls can this be the halfway point to the recap

AT LEAST

so they were exiled after the whole jack: ascend thing, right? considering theyre way in the future. man no fucking wonder.

speaking of jack

man that whole dad and jack interaction was gold, ngl

OH THAT EXPLAINS THE RING THEN

and wow, andrew’s really giving us the best female content huh. andrew is the true god of equality and diversity.

also hey, i didnt realize that wow. so PM tricked the queen in showing the parking ticket to be able to take the present from jack. she’s a smart cookie, that one..

she and PM basically snitched on jack and it was the best thing that has happened to me so far

oh yeah okay

but why did AR panic over bec? bc thats something we havent learned yet, right?

anyways

exile town, the only town which should exist. facts. i dont make the rules.

noice

i love PM being queen. like.. thats canon now. shes an actual queen.

yeah that was a fun game and the consorts were cute

fuck yeah the dick head

hate them even more now that i know john was killed because of them

anyways, i wonder what dick move dave’s denizen did? maybe thats why its filled with lava bc the denizen was like “fuck it. make the land red. kill them all”

UH WHAT

WHAT

OH MY GOD HOW DID I JUST FORGET NANNAS LETTER LIKE THAT LMFAO

THEIR TITLES WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!

so i still dont know what they mean but i can gather it has something to do with the game giving them abilities. considering dave is the “knight of time” and he can go back in time. whack.

which means john can either control someones breathing or simply wind. and rose is... like that one girl in the winx club who does the sun shit. bc whenever i think of light powers, i think of stella.

and jade is space. witch of space.

nice

i have no idea what that means ngl

okay finally

we’re at the trolls

maybe this recap will end soon

i remember when i thought they were internet bullies

yesss

someone asked if i basically knew the trolls were on a different veil than the kids, so not presently with them, and i know lol. i was making a joke before btw. jsyk. dont think im incompetent to forget these things when sometimes i choose to forget it so i can add in a joke

it be like that, i annoy many

then again, pls dont assume im trying to say im not incompetent bc im also a fucking dumbass and DO forget shit and i have no excuse

imagine being so bored on the meteor, your last resort is speaking to aliens

ngl me if i was ever trapped on a meteor and could potentially do that

nah ik its bc its their only hope at helping with their session or whatever tf CG said to john. but there was BOUND to be a conference meeting between them like “okay guys. humans. that needs to be sorted out” and you just hear CG screaming in the background

i cant wait to meet them honestly bc im growing on all 4 of the ones we’ve seen already. and on top of that, i know what they look like and i know theyre not THAT bad, just a little on the crayy zee side sometimes

but theyre trying

OH MY GOD

I GET IT

FUCK

DOES THAT MEAN THE INTERMISSION IS *APART* OF THE MAIN FUCKING STORY??

AND SPADES IS WV FOR THE TROLLS

GOD D A M N

wow

i didnt expect that. but maybe the signs were there and i was just willingly choosing to ignore it or smth bc “haha couldnt be, right”

flashbacks to how i thought the trolls were humans

anyways, i guess he got his revenge on the kids version of “snowman” ie the black queen. but really

he did not have to do that. he could have cut off the finger and fled. but he decided “nah, lets implode her” so the loml is dead and all i got was a catchy song

i knew they were different types of “bullies” but now i just have to replace bullies with uhh

trolling strategies

anyways, this is cute. i love how they’ve come to be friends through mutual frustration. good part in the comic.

i wonder why it explodes

more importantly

....

terminator time?

this was my favourite sequences of dialogues in the whole entirety of homestuck. that is to say the back and forth thing that the kids went through to become a sort of wingman for the other.

absolutely gold.

all except AT’s rap.

GC was the only smart one with the linear shit

anyways fuck he still has to kill the denizen now but apparently its hard to beat for a sleeping dick head so

that will be fun for the future

john will probably need to kill A LOT of imps to get there

yeah rose is a badass bc she slayed that thing with needles of all things

OH and the white queen was the cursive

damn did AR ever do the whole guide process to a kid yet? maybe he will with dave, idk

oHHH

i fucking SEE

thats why he said DNA

to use it and replace all the life forms in the ocean

fucking neat wow

man that sounded sarcastic but im genuinely impressed bc all i got was bullshit as i read jaspersprites log

so thats the secret. it was “meow” bc that somehow translates to the genetic code she needs then. and that code apparently took fucking years to write as well. sick. whack. oh man.

derse is very pretty, ngl

and wow shit

“dave had already been awake in his tower all along without realizing it” how tf does someone just

do that, awake in both places at once

i didnt even fucking realize that fact as i read that pesterlog wow

ah yes, around the time things got confusing

okay so the capsule makes sense bc at first i didnt know it was a fucking time capsule so i got confused as to how it just apparated the game lmfao

the more you know i guess *twinkle*

i find that a neat concept tho

like the whole whatever you prototype affects the imps and shit

yeah so that whole “he had no advice” basically impacted his future

no shit dave wanted to reset things bc he probably thought he caused some sort of bad butterfly effect and killed his best friend

fuck calsprite thats all im gonna say

i read that first sentence and i think i got an aneurysm

and then everything else just made me sad again

i mean good thing he fucking did amirite?

we got pain at first but now we got cool shit like idk

fucking DAVESPRITE

damn idk how that works

will rose have like two minds now? or will this be some steven universe fusion shit?

“and understood their meaning” course well i fucking didnt so could you pls elaborate, rose?

okay but then what the fuck did he use that was inside the fucking box

bc i thought he used his knife?

im only every going to refer him as that now, thank you andrew

alright okay..

god that was a lot

i dont know what will happen once i click on those links but i am going to see that for myself bc i refuse to add ANYTHING ELSE

[unholyhelbiglinked]

Summer of 89′ | 003

Read from the start | Read on AO3

There was an undertone of bleach in the air. Something that didn’t hit Chloe the second she walked through the sliding doors. Instead, it was gradual. Creeping up the back of her throat and clouding her lungs until she couldn’t recognize it at all. It used to bother her, the scent of bleach.

Everything was too clean in the hospital for her liking. She had grown up in a home that wasn’t afraid to get dirty. Mud was tracked against the kitchen floor when a good heaping of rain was dumped on their ranch property. The tub was rimmed with a line of black after every bath as a child- because dirt was natural. Messes were natural, or at least they were when it was anywhere but here.

Chloe closed her umbrella, letting the stray drops of water slide down her hand and past the cuff of her jacket until the cold streak touched her elbow. She dug her boots into the black mat right past the doors, leaving behind the very dirt she was self-conscious enough not to leave tracked against the Hospital lobby.

It was relatively desolate considering the full moon hung in the sky like a golden ornament on a Douglas fir. It wasn’t peak flu season, and Chloe thanked the higher powers for that. But that didn’t’ stop everyone from faking coughing fits and begging her to test for a fever one more time because their temperature was sure to have spiked over the last two minutes.

She punched the code into the worn-down pad next to the second set of doors and was met with another long white corridor lined with shy wooden doors. The sound of machines whirring, and IV’s dripping carried on like white noise. She walked with confidence.

“Doctor-“The voice echoed against the walls as one of her latest interns trotted up next to her. Her magenta scrubs stuck out like a beacon in a white sea. She quickly flipped the metal chart back to reveal a paper. “I’m so glad you’re here. I was wondering if you could take a look at the medications given to 207. Doesn’t seem right to me.”

She was annoyed. She would have been annoyed at anyone at this moment, reminding her of a job she kept for one summer at a sandwich shop. Customers came so frequently that that same disgruntled edge of dissatisfaction pulled at her. Still, she nodded and glanced at the chart.

Sixty-four-year-old Damion Coves. A repeat offender of the Emergency room, once or twice a month if Chloe could remember. A strong reason she had given the patient to her Intern in the first place. Sometimes it was a broken arm, but most of the time it was in relation to a back problem he refused to fix. He had worked as a fisherman for countless years, hauling product and gutting sea life.

“Hydrocodone and acetaminophen?” Chloe mumbled, as she furrowed her brow and looked up at the doe-eyed girl.

“Yes, Ma’am. He’s been complaining about the pain escalating. Demerol hasn’t done the job in quite some time and by the looks of it, he’s refusing the surgery.”

Chloe hummed, “He doesn’t like his odds against the possibility of being paralyzed from the waist down. Switch these to Propoxyphene. Damion Coves is an alcoholic, the second you pump him full of those and send him on his way he’ll stumble off the docks.” She shoved the metal chart back into her hands “Get to know your patient. You can smell the bourbon on his breath from a mile away.”  

She continued her journey until she made it to her office. It was three corridors deep, surrounded by cool cement and filled with old copy boxes that had case files. Ways she would teach her interns with gallbladder removals and that one stomach-churning patient who was almost sawed in half at the old mill.

Chloe breathed in the musty scent and flicked on the light. Her desk was the only clear thing about the office- despite her working here for four years, having the place all to herself. There was one picture of her girls hidden away in the bottom compartment of her filing cabinet. Her computer was covered in yellow sticky notes, and a nametag rested in the center of the surface.

“Ilene” She scoffed before pulling on the white coat slung over the chair and clipping the metal to the collar.

Her rounds started in a few minutes, she left the stuffy office and walked back into the sterilized hallway. She made it the nurse’s desk without another interruption and grabbed the stack of metal charts left by the attending on first shift.

“How are you tonight, Chloe?” her breath caught, she was halfway through the notes on Mrs. Robinson’s chart. She silently cursed herself for not hearing the heels against the linoleum. “Ilene.”

She drew in a deep breath, “Oh, absolutely fantastic, love these overnights.”

“fewer people.”

Chief Mary Saxe leaned against the counter next to Chloe, a smug look on her face. She had pulled her hair from the usual bun and let the curls move over her shoulders in waves. She was graying but in the most flawless way possible. Her jacket was pressed and her shirt was tucked in with professionalism despite the ungodly hour.

She had a point. It was quiet at night, visiting hours had faded away to nothing and the only people Chloe had to deal with were those listed in the charts, and whoever found themselves in the ER with appendicitis or a fever too high to register.

The two of them started walking towards the front of the corridor again, a round of silence plaguing them both before Chloe spoke. “You don’t have to babysit me, I’m fine.”

“I’m going to pretend I believe you.” She stalled before grasping Chloe’s elbow and bringing her to a halt. “I’ve known you for a hell of a long time, practically watched you grow up. You always get weird around today.”

Chloe swallowed roughly “You don’t have to worry about me. I’m here to do my job. Save lives and kick ass. Your motto, remember?”

“No, yes, I remember just. I’m speaking to you as a friend, not a colleague here. If you need to leave, I understand.”

“And I’m telling you as your friend, I’m okay. In fact, I would rather be around other people then shut in my room binge-watching the bachelor with a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream. So, can we please get on with rounds and just drop this?”

Doctor Saxe stared at her for a few moments, trying to figure out if Chloe was being genuine or not. She eventually decided that it didn’t matter if she was. Both of them continued on their way and made it to the first patient behind curtain number one.

It always felt like a game show to her. She never knew what would be behind the thin veil of plastic. Of course, she could always look at the chart before she went in. But that would take the fun and surprise out of it all.

The same intern that had approached her earlier about Damion seemed to have done all the heavy lifting. The little boy that sat on the bed directed his strained attention. His hair was adhered to his head with rainwater and mud. His arm was being placed carefully into a splint, and his mother was pacing a hole into the linoleum.

She stopped mid-stride and turned her hawked expression to the two doctors. “oh thank god, this girl looks too young to be a doctor.”

“Ma’am, I assure you, Stephanie has gone through all four years of medical school.” Chloe said slowly “And she’s doing a fantastic job. Mind telling me how this happened?”

She quickly forgot her anger towards the doctor, switching the string of her own son instead. “I told him not to go outside. Said that there was a storm coming and it was best to stay out of that old treehouse of his. But he never listens. The wood got too slick and he fell, broke his arm.”

She nodded and Doctor Saxe watched the situation unfold. She stayed silent, keeping a lingering eye on Chloe more than anything. Her arms were crossed and Chloe minded herself, directing her next questions towards where the kid sat and kicking his feet.

“Anything else hurt, little man?”

“Nothing does.” The mother answered in a clipped tone instead. Cutting off her son completely.

Doctor Saxe capped her hands together once and boasted a smile. “Okay! Stephanie, ma’am, why don’t’ we go out into the hallway to discuss how to take care of that cast. I know it’ll be hard to keep it dry in this weather- but we’re going to show you how.”

Chloe mouthed a thinly veiled ‘thank you’ as the woman and her intern cleared the room completely so she could do the rest of the exam. She slid on violet gloves and pulled a stool over to the young boy. He seemed comfortable, if not sleepy from today’s events. There was a thin line of blood on his chin and another on his forehead.

“Did you hit your head at all, when you fell?”

He gestured no “I don’t think so, I heard my arm break. Johnny broke his arm at the ice rink two years ago and it sounded the exact same. I didn’t think it would hurt that bad.”

“Oh?” Chloe gave him a smile, gently getting a better look at the lacerations “Yeah, it’s not the greatest feeling in the world but you know what? You’re very brave for getting through it. And look at that amazing cast you have! Is blue your favorite color?”

“Yes! And look, someone already signed it!”

Chloe lifted her eyebrows. Stephanie had just been finishing it up when they walked into the room. His mother must have worked fast, maybe even kept a sharpie in her purse wedged between some hard candies and wet wipes.

“see.”

Dread owned Chloe Beale in that moment. Directed all of her thawed blood to rush past her ears and her vision to fog up. She stared at the words scribbled in silver sharpie against the polymer-coated cast. The lettering was neat and precise, too well thought out to be ignored. Too concrete to be imagined.

Summer of 89, remember?

[goddamnmuses-a]

Dan Watches: Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope

Alright so I did this for Episode I which you can find here and then Episode II which you can find here and then Episode III which you can find here. So here’s my weird live reaction/note taking/whatever this is.. to Episode lV.

I remember this being my favourite of the original trilogy because it sets everything up and basically kick started everything but lets see if that changes when i’ve finally got through all of these. 

Also I’m just watching whatever version i can find online because I can’t be bothered to go and find my dvd of it so yeah.. whether we get weird updated version or original effects or whatever, who knows. 

All the old effects like how C3p0 looks and r2d2 are impressive. 

There wasn’t really anything in the opening crawl i felt like commenting on, no big THEY DID THAT IN THE OPENING? but i guess it’s the first one that came out so that makes sense. 

WTF did the stormtroopers use to get that door open, that was so explosive wtf.

Also the blasters are like set to 10000 and smoke is everywhere. 

How did nobody shoot the dorids?

Yooo little Ani nice suit my dude. 

Hold on, she sent a msg with r2 to go to Obiwan which for 1 howd she know he’s alive? I’m gonna presume her dad said or something and 2.. ..why not just.. go yourself? 

So when they’re set to stun a Stormtrooper can shoot someone no problem

Also we dont get enough stun weird circle blaster shots

Ohhhh she didnt go because the scan for lifeforms thing alright ill allow it

but my dude.. even so.. maybe just shoot it just in case? like.. droids exist and people know about them?

DARTH VADERS LITTLE HANDS ON HIPS! Omfg he’s like “God damn, this bitch again.”

This Vader is a sassy boy. 

I love this guy who works with Vader and doesnt mind chatting back to him. 

Loving the droids in the desert. 

R2 does not look like it would work in a desert. 

C3 like “He tricked me into going this way” stop being a lil bich. 

WOOTINI!

The crawler thingy is badass. 

I thought that was a magnet it was just a big sucky pipe. 

GONK

Oh yep theres the new effects. 

Droids sleep? I guess power saver mode. 

Wtf is that dome droid

Luke! Luuuuuke! Iconic 2 words there. Well reused for that episode of Rebels where Obiwan watches from a distance. 

Bocce.. what a classic language. 

OMG OWEN JUST LET HIM GO INTO TOSHE STATION TO PICK UP SOME POWER CONVERTERS JEEEEZ 

How is that “wasting time with friends” and not chores, going into town to get something sounds like a chore to me. 

Why did they get an atromech anyway? Like.. what’d they need the other droid for? 

C3 is a real bro lbh, if it wasn’t for him, R2 would be with the jawa still. 

Oooh oil bath. sexy. 

I wonder if people ship R2 and C3 because tbh it makes sense to me. 

Luke got an erection at the mention of the rebellion. 

Now it’s getting harder at that random blurry image of his sister. 

R2 is a cheeky lil shit. 

This is just some good home life shit. 

Dat soundtrack. 

You know what.. it’s a really nice home. 

Is it just me or is Owen dressed kinda Jedi-y. 

So is “Sand People” like the racist way to say “Tusken Raider”?

Obiwan, thats a ridiculous fucking noise. 

“Hello There” iconic. 

You know what the Prequels do add a lot to this. 

A young Jedi named Darth Vader.. im sorry.. thats just not a name. 

For someone who wants to get off the planet, Lukes like “Naa but i gotta get home”

Obiwan also just being like “You know what, fuck it here.. lets go.”

You know what as much of a bitch as that guy who gets force choked is, he’s a good actor. 

Also Tarkin yay. 

NOOOOO OWEN AND BERU! YOU BASTARDS!

I feel like he should have dropped to his knees or something there. 

That is a scary droid. 

Cool door close. 

Thats a weird ass CG droid with a hole in. 

None of the other storm troopers gonna wonder why Dave’s being weird? 

Wahey! Figrin Dan and the Model Nodes! Love that Jizz music. 

Who just ugs on the back of a bartenders shirt? Wtf Luke

Yo he didnt even pay for his drink, free drinks?

Who gets the death sentance in 12 systems and goes around bragging? 

The first arm cut off and theres all sortsw of blood which there shouldnt be because lightsabers cauterize the wound, tut tut. 

Gooood scene with Han and Obi, honestly i keep forgetting to comment because im just watching xD

Wahey! Greedo 

If we’re doing a han shot first thing.. Greedo shot first in this version and missed and then Han shot him but tbh i prefer the Han shot first.. makes him more interesting. 

Jabba looks smaller. 

Casual Boba Fett appearance. 

Yooo Poncho. My boy Cal approves. 

Fuck those weird long nose aliens. 

The Falcon looks so good. 

Get those poor guys by the Death Star laser a damn rail. 

We just cool with igniting the lightsaber in front of Han and Chewie? Chewie at least knows wtf it is.

Chewie is a badass. 

Let the Wookie win. 

WTF that isnt the lightspeed effect.. it’s like a weird blanket tunnel 

The fact they get onto the Death Star with no issue is kind of ridiculous. 

The motion of Darth Vader is kinda just.. not fitting right. 

Han just pat Chewie like hes a dog. Rude. 

Han just gets caught up in this without a choice rly. 

He just wants those sweet credits. 

Also Set Design on Star Wars is amazing. 

Leia just lounging all sexy like 

Also does she have a stain on her tit? .. Not that im looking >.>

The Jedi being called a religion is kinda weird but i guess accurate. 

This has to be the worst star to a friendship for all three of them. Chewie seems cool though. 

I also thought the trash compactor scene was earlier on in this movie than it is. 

Who the fucks voice was it that said “Thats your imagination” ? 

How the fuck are they standing if the water is that deep?

I liek the touch of the monster whos name im sure i learnt but forgot let go as if it knew the trash compactor was about to turn on, that implies it has a safe spot down there that it stays. 

Some of the voices sound off on this but ah well 

Hans already a little Handsy with Leia but i think Harrison Ford was sleeping with Carie at the time so like.. i get it. 

Obiwan just strolling about, as you do. 

I love just these giant pits with walkways with no rails. If I worked on the Death Star it’d be a nightmare for me to get around. 

“NO WAIT THEY’LL HEAR!” ...and they’re not gonna hear you shouting?

Stormtroopers just shooting the shit is the best. 

You know what with everyone being like “Wow that ships a shitheap.” I can understand why the prequels made their ships look nicer and newer. 

I love that shooting a door panel in star wars just makes it so the doors wont open at all, thats some good shit. 

Lukes as bad of a shot as a Stormtrooper. 

First little kissy incesty moment but hey it was on the cheek, universally thats fine but im sure at the time this was him setting up that Luke and Leia were gonna end up together, before he decided they were siblings. 

Vader just standing there, lightsaber already out like “Ahhh Mr.Kenobi I’ve been expecting you”

As lack luster as the chroeography is in this fight im kinda thinking of it as like, they’re reading each other, like Obiwan and Maul’s final fight. 

I don’t really know why Obiwan just chooses to die like that but heyo. 

Vader stomping on Obiwans clothes? Why? I guess because he gave himself to the force and thats the first time he’s seen that? 

I love the gunner seats moving around, idk why i just love it. 

Whats the point of the ear peices if they’re just gonna shout at each other. 

Not mentioned it until now but everyone says Leia wrong. 

They’re really harsh to Han tbf

This is like if you got an Uber to a place and then the Uber driver got pulled into a police station because you’re a terrorist and then you have a go at the Uber driver for wanting to leave after he’s got you out of there. 

Another kiss for Luke.. .. okay

I like how Biggs earlier scenes are deleted so when he shows up it’s just this random dude who somehow knows Luke

That air traffic control guy has no idea what hes doing, nobody is even in the air yet or moving, wait. 

Man X wings are cool, makes me think of Battlefronts VR mission thing where you get to pilot one and it’s the coolest VR thing ive done. 

For a space station the size of a moon you’d think they’d have enough fighters to just wipe out the rebels no biggy. 

ALSO if they know the rebel base is on that planet, why not just blow that planet up? 

YAY WEDGE

The targetting computer seems very invasive. 

Those turrets are useless. 

I would have rated it if they let that random dude blow up the Death Star.

Tarkins thinking face is beautiful. What a man, 

If Luke missed this shot, everyone knows he’s turned his targetting computer off, so they would be PISSED

RIP R2. 

HWHAT!? 

Woooo Mr.Solo. 

Well.. Well done Luke you killed a lot of people, some just trying to do a job and live their lives. 

Han, Leia and Luke all went off together all holding each other.. like.. Threesome? 

I’m sorry but after that, someones doing some fucking. 

Leia just giving her lovers, dont @ me, a medal. Thats why Chewie doesnt get one, he wasnt there for the orgy. 

R2 looking fresh. 

You know what, that is a good complete story that actually works on its own, i appreaciate that. 10/10. :P

[osmw1]

Dimension Wave   Chapter 13 — Cheesy

I’m standing in front of the cave. In my hand is my fishing rod with a sinker threaded onto the line.

“Let’s do this then.”

They silently nod in response and I cast my line. I have fine control over my rod, thanks to Fishing Mastery IV. The hook sinks right into the Lizardman Dark Knight. It probably dealt a point or two of damage, but it can hardly be called an attack. But it did exactly what I wanted it to—pulling its aggro.

“It’s comin’! Get ready, everybody!”

I’m not even sure if I did any damage to it, but it’s rushing towards us at the speed of lightning. If this were any other monster, we’d be instantly destroyed, but…

Kaboom!

The Lizardman Dark Knight slammed into the mouth of the cave accompanied by a terrible crash. Yup. The Lizardman Dark Knight doesn’t fit through the entrance. There are a lot of games where you can trap monsters by getting them to clip against objects. It’s an easy way to level up, but devs usually patch stuff like this out pretty quickly. Fortunately, it works in Dimension Wave. And it goes without saying that there’s a chance of it not working, but after discussing it between the three of us, we decided to try it out.

“Let’s kick its ass!” “Understood!” “Aye!”

The rest was straightforward. All we had to do was use the weapons and skills we had to and keep on attacking the trapped monster. I took out my Cetus Longsword and started hacking away at the trapped Lizardman Dark Knight too.

Unfortunately, I don’t think I’m doing too much damage. My strikes connect with a dull clank. I couldn’t tell from a distance, but now I know that it’s not only clad in armor but also covered in scales. Its defense is accordingly high too. I look over and see Shouko endlessly thrusting and swinging as well. Yamikage has some kind of scroll-shaped magic tome by his mouth and begins chanting. Moments after, a black visual effect appears, and he starts absorbing green orbs from the Lizardman Dark Knight.

That’s probably his Drain, a dark magic spell. Shouko and I aren’t using any skills though. We don’t know how much HP this boss has, so it’d be hard to guess if we’d make up any energy expended.

“This guy is literally so tough. Can you even win fighting normally?” “I have heard talk of a party defeating it before.”

We strike up a conversation, but our hands hadn’t stopped.

“’Tis naught but a rumor, but supposedly, they had tanks occupying the monster while they blasted it with light magic from a distance.” “I see. Its physical defense is as high as it looks to be.”

It’s just a guess, but I don’t think we’re quite fit to fight this Lizardman Dark Knight. The folding fan doesn’t do much damage and Drain is a dark-type skill. Our chances of winning are zero if not for cheesing it. My attacks make an unpleasant clank when I hit it and that’s with my strongest weapon I have. Oh, and if I had to say, I think a metal axe or even a blunt melee weapon would fare much better.

“In any case, if it doesn’t make any strange movements, we can just keep on wailing on it.” “Okay!” “Aye!”

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step is what they say. Just gotta keep at it.

Thirty minutes later.

“I-It’s still standing. How much freakin’ HP does this bastard have…”

If we get too close, it’ll strike back at us. We’re barely managing to outrange it. Especially with Shouko. The range on her fan is short, so she’s gotta occasionally parry its attacks. Not to mention, the AI causes it to try to run away from time to time. Naturally, I summon it back with my fishing rod. Seeing how I’m able to manage that says a lot about how smart the AI is.

“Perhaps it has regenerating capabilities.” “Nay. ‘Tis but because our offense is lacking.”

Well, that’s true, but I’m about average, I’d say. It’s been seemingly forever since we’ve attacked this monster, resulting in its armor crumbling and even scales ripped off. Still, it’s tough mentally to keep this up for a whole hour on a single monster.

“Be nourishment for my spirit. Drain!”

Yamikage’s been spamming Drain endlessly for 30 minutes and now even has more Energy than Shouko. That’s to say, he has about 27,000 right now. The Lizardman Dark Knight sure has a lot of HP.

“Whoa?”

As soon as the familiar green orbs get drained by Yamikage, the Lizardman Dark Knight moved in a peculiar way like nothing seen before. It keeled over with a deafening wheeze. It crumbles and slams onto the ground while luckily, causing no earthquakes.

“Hath it finally perished?” “Hey! That’s a death flag right there!” “Hmm, aye. I have left my younger sister behind in my hometown. Therefore, death must wait!”

… god damnit. I like his enthusiasm.

“Goodness… whatever are you two doing?”

Shouko shot a chilling glance over at us while confirming that the enemy is dead. Bosses feign death too. I raise my guard and get closer.

“Be wary. It may be feigning death.” “Gotcha.” “That is unlikely.” “Why’s that?” “Dark it may be, but it is still a knight. I believe it would have more honor than to do something so cowardly.”

Hmm, she’s got a point. It’s normally the demons and tribals that play dead, I think. Well, I guess the Lizardmen are a tribe, but still, it’s a knight. It should be honorable. More honorable than us, at least. We’re the one who trapped it and cheesed it to death. But ignore that.

“As for drops… we obtain a Fragment of Darkness and Dark Spear Splinter.” “We may sell those for a hefty sum.”

It’ll make us a good bit of coin, though I’m not exactly broke. Well, it doesn’t hurt to have more money. According to Yamikage, that two-handed spear is a material and a very desirable one for spear-wielders because of its dark element.

“Such is the prowess of a gutting-type weapon, true to what the rumors say.”

The real issue now is what to do. I glance over to Shouko and give her a look. Honestly, I want to gut it. I don’t think I’d get another chance to gut it. And likely, what we’d get from the monster would be really good for weapons and armor. A side of me is saying to keep the secret but the other side of me really wants the boss loot.

“We’re buddies that took down a boss together, so I guess I’ll tell ya…”

There ain’t nothin’ better than boss drops.

“If you are fine with it, Kizuna, then I believe it is for the best as well.” “Hmm? What is the meaning of this?” “Well, just watch. Speed Gutting…”

After chanting the skill, I take my Cetus Longsword and start to butcher up the giant Lizardman Dark Knight. I can’t do anything about the armor and scales broken off of it, but I can harvest the rest of his scales, bones, flesh, teeth, eyes, skin, tail, and even blood. But, for some reason, I can’t make use of what I broke off of it in the fight. It’s like the complete opposite of that certain monster hunting game.

“Egads…”

Yamikage mutters out in shock. Since this is a boss monster, I got as much material as I did from the Giant Herring. The Giant Herring must’ve been the boss of its species too.

“What on earth is this? Hath the items increased? Doth gutting-type weapons not increase our drops?” “It is poorly explained in the manual, but this is the proper way of using a gutting weapon.” “Never have I been more surprised in this world before!”

I can’t tell whether he’s really that surprised or his acting is just overboard, but his words are filled with zeal. Well, even if he tells everyone about this, we can still make plenty of cash if we sell these boss items quick enough.

“Then, shall I keep this a secret too?” “Huh?” “It seems as though Misses Kizuna and Hakoniwa were both keeping this undisclosed. As gratitude for saving my life, I, too, shall bring this secret to my grave.” “W-Well, I’d appreciate it if you would…”

And to think he had almost killed us. I’m glad he changed his mind. If he’ll keep it a secret, then I really don’t have any problems with him.

“However, I doth have an issue to discuss…” “What is it?” “May I perhaps join your party?” “… why?” “I have been playing alone up till now.” “Is that right?”

Shouko questions him. He’s got such a weird build. It’s no wonder no one’s letting him in their party. I almost blurted that out loud, but I held my tongue.

“It may hath been on your tongues already, but I have a communication disorder.” “…?”

… what was that? Unfortunately, I had no clue. Some might think his roleplaying is over the top, but I think most enjoy it. At least Alto or Romina wouldn’t have a problem with it.

“Many times, I have wished to join a party, but I always end up unable to.” “I am sorry to hear.”

Shouko’s totally starting to let her guard down. It totally reeks of a scam.

“Question.” “Aye?” “You said you have a communication disorder, but you’re talkin’ to us just fine.” “Speaking like this—like a ninja—seems to help.”

What kind of reasoning is that? At least come up with a better excuse.

“Mine heart is pounding as we speak now.” “Goodness! Kizuna, let her travel with us. We are fellow Spirits after all!”

What is this feeling? Like I’m watching my friends getting swindled? W-Well, I guess a party wouldn’t be too bad… hmm?

“What did you just say?” “We are fellow Spirits after all?” “No, before that.” “We should travel with her? “Yeah. ‘Her’?”

Yamikage’s wrapped up in all black. That’s not something you could tell at first glance. There’s even black cloth wrapped around their mouth, so it’s hard to tell by their voice.

“I am embarrassed to show my true face in front of others, but if we are to fight together, then please, look at me.”

Saying that, Yamikage unravels the black cloth…

—and reveals a beauty girl with silver hair.

contents: /prologue/ /ch001/ /ch002/ /ch003/ /ch004/ /ch005/ /ch006/ /ch007/ /ch008/ /ch009/ /ch010/ /ch011/ /ch012/ /ch013/ /next/

(please support me on Patreon or Paypal)

[julesthequirky]

Forget Me Not -One-

Summary: You wake up as Y/N Winchester, having no recollection how you came to be, all you know is there’s a Djinn out there and you have to find it. It’s your job, your duty, except the world isn’t as it should be. Castiel isn't Castiel and he’s claiming you aren't you. Or are you?

Warnings: Dissociative Identity Disorder, angst, language

You woke with a start. A blue curtain was pulled around you and you heard the steady beep of a machine beside you. The last you remembered was crashing through a window and hitting your head on the ground. Then darkness.

The Djinn! You had to find out where it had got to and how many more people it had caught.

You sat straight up and gave a gritted cry as you pulled out the IV. You wrapped your wrist with a cloth and quickly dressed. They didn’t appear to be your clothes, because none of the items contained plaid or denim. You grabbed your shoulder bag and left your little cubicle. You kept your head down just in case anybody recognised you.

Outside it was warm and the sun beat down on your head. You looked around the busy bay, not recognising anything. You spotted a sign. Vancouver General Hospital. Vancouver?! You weren’t even in America! You should have been in Iowa!

“Ah, shit!”

At that point, your bag started buzzing and ringing with some top 40’s chart hit. Urgh. You rummaged around until you found the offending sound. On caller ID you saw “Bae” on the display. Who the hell is Bae? You answered and put the phone to your ear.

“Hello?”

“Honey, oh thank God, I’ve been worried sick. Where are you? Everyone’s looking for you.”

Across the line it sounded a little like Castiel with a little less grit in his voice.

“Cas?”

There was a pause. “Did you hit your head again?”

Again? What the hell did that mean?

“What? Forget that” You waved a hand in front of your face as you spoke. “I need to get back to Iowa. There’s a Djinn, help me out.”

You heard a sigh.

“Oh baby, you hit your head hard, didn’t you?”

“Look, I may have had a tumble but I’m fine. Just get me to Iowa.” You ended the call.

You stood, wondering and waiting for Castiel. You walked circles until the boredom kicked in. He had called you baby and honey. Those words weren’t usually a part of his vacabulary. You knelt down on the sidewalk, dropping your bag to the ground in the process. Inside you grabbed a thick filofax and pulled it out. Inside it was full of thoughts and reprisals of days. On one side of the file, you saw your name and the anti-possession symbol. You flipped over the page and saw ‘read me’. You scoffed.

Below the sign was a letter. With your name on it.

 Y/N Winchester,

 Stay where you are and read this before doing ANYTHING.

 Answer all calls from ‘Bae’, you’ll recognise him, I promise. Let him know where you are so he can pick you up. Tell him the last thing you remember. He’ll be able to correct you. Listen to him.

 You are me. Integrate your life with my life. Do the things I would do. Wear the clothes I would wear. Listen to my music, read what I read, meet with my friends, go to the events and meetings.

 Last but not least: there are no monsters. They’re not real. The world you’re in is different from mine. So, please, don’t go searching.

 Y/N Collins x

 You shook your head. Whoever this lady was she had a stick up her ass. You hated being told what to do, everyone knew that. You stuffed the planner inside the bag. In there you found keys, a planner, a phone, power bank and cable, earphones, D&G sunglasses and two platinum gold rings. Maybe you could pawn them for cash, though it seemed whoever this so called other you was, they were loaded.

Fifteen minutes later a sleek black SUV pulled up beside you. The door opened, a foot stepped out, in bright trainers, leg clad in light blue denim. Anther foot followed and you saw Castiel in a dark blue shirt. His hair was wild and fluffed. He looked good. Sexy even. He’d always looked good in his usual getup, but this was different and you couldn’t keep the shock off your face.

“Cas, you got new duds! And a car!!”

He smiled at you then pulled you in for a hug. Your eyes widened. Cas was never one for physical affection.

“Oh my God, did you get a personality transplant?” you asked after he released you.

His eyes turned downcast as sadness tinged them and he gave you a weak smile.

“Let’s get you home shall we?”

“What? Home? God, no, Cas, I need to get to Iowa. There’s a Djinn.”

He reached into your bag and pulled out the filofax. He held it up.

“This has instructions for you when this happens. You need to read them.” He flipped it open and you rolled your eyes.

“I read her letter.”

“You did?” He looked at you, gripping the planner in his hands. “Well, that’s good.”

You looked at the car, at him and where you were.

“Did you lose your angel mojo or something? And how come you happen to be in Vancouver like me? I don’t even know how I ended up here.”

“I’ll explain on the way.” he said and gestured to the car.

You sighed and complied with his request. The interior of the car was plush. It was all leather and faux marble. He closed your door, walked round to his side and slid into the drivers seat, shutting the door after him.

It was cooler inside. He had the air-con on. Before you could talk a call came through. He answered. The voice you recognised.

“Hey, I got your text, is everything okay? Did you manage to find her?”

“Sam?”

There was a pause before either of them spoke.

“She hit her head, didn’t she?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“I am right here, I can hear both of you.”

Castiel looked to you “I know, and ill explain everything to you once we get back, I promise. Meet us back at my apartment. Both of you.”

“Of course, man. We’ll be there. Need me to let Bob know?”

“I’ll let him know.”

“All right, see you soon, bye.”

“Bye.”

The call ended and it wasn’t too long before you pulled up to a luxurious block of apartments. Castiel cut the engine and stepped out. You stepped out and followed him. You eyed the doorman and Castiel pulled you through the atrium and into an elevator. He jabbed the 9 button. It was maddening how fast it took to reach the floor. He took you along a corridor and around a corner. Leaning against the wall by a door were Sam and Dean.

“Sam, Dean! What the hell are you guys doing in Vancouver? There’s a Djinn in Iowa!”

Dean looked at Sam and then to Castiel and back to you.

“Crap, you weren’t kidding. What do we tell Bob?”

“Nothing, I’ll tell him.” He opened the door, placed his hand on your lower back and guided you in.

You were amazed by the sheer size of the place. During the whole time you had known him, he hadn’t said the slightest about owning a large place. When he lost his wings, he had been homeless. This was a shock.

“Oh my God, Cas, I didn’t know you had money!”

As he guided you to a grey couch, you were astounded by the art he had on his walls, in awe of the oak sets he owned, and finally you sat. He sat opposite you as Sam and Dean sat on either side of you.

“You told me to be real and to be myself if this happened again, so I will. Firstly I’m not Castiel. I’m Misha, and they’re not Sam and Dean. They’re Jensen and Jared. We, all four of us work on a show called Supernatural where we play these characters, except when you hit your head, you weren’t yourself, you were somehow your character.”

You looked at him, letting it all sink in. You hoped to God this wasn’t true.

“There are no monsters. They don’t exist. There is no Djinn, darling. You don’t need to travel to Iowa. There, however was a Djinn in the last episode you played, from last season and we are now just picking up the season after being on hiatus.”

You couldn’t breathe.

“It can’t not be real.” you said after a few minutes.

“It’s true.” He stood up and went to the mantle, grabbing a photo and taking it over to you.

“This is us, on our wedding day.”

You took the photo from him, and saw yourself adorned in a white lace gown with 3/4 sleeves, holding a bouquet of white roses. Beside you was Castiel, or Misha.

Your adrenaline spiked and you flew up and pushed the photo into his hands. Your breath came out in a pant and you felt the nausea rising. This was not your reality. Your reality was fighting monsters alongside your brothers.

“I married fake Castiel.” you gasped your world turning upside down.

You stumbled out of their way, holding a hand to the wall, your other pinching the bridge of your nose, trying to get your breath back and desperately trying to make the dizziness go away. A hand touched your shoulder.

“Honey-”

“Please, don’t. I-I’m not her.”

His hand fell from your shoulder.

“She said when this happened to integrate you with everything she did. Why don’t you try it?”

“No…No. She’s so organised. I’m not. She writes her thoughts out in that planner of hers for Christ’s sake. I bet she even has restroom breaks in there.”

“They’re for you to read. Why don’t we take you to set?”

“Do you think that’s a good idea, Misha?” Fake Dean asked.

“It might help her to adjust.”

The set. Of course. You looked at them.

“Take me there.”

Forget Me Not Tags:

@ain-t-bovvered @ezilyamuzed

Misha Fic Tags:

@goobykeding

[clanzenith]

THE WHOLE STORY

So like, im super busy with work and life BUT i really miss doing fr stuff so like, before i forget all of the lore i wanted to write out and stuff im just gonna condense it all here and give it stories and art and stuff that link back when i have more time SO SPOILERS AHEAD

tl;dr for all of this: Knight-Paladin Caroline Adopts The World And Maybe Almost Dies???

also @your-local-birb in case you wanted a lore ping

So from where i left off, Caroline and the Paladins have adopted Iago, having no clue that he’s got a ship full of his own fam waiting the harbor

Caroline & Co don’t really let him sneak off to go see them or anything because for some reason all of the Guardians in town have been disappearing and that is Not Good for a group that is made ALMOST EXCLUSIVELY OF GUARDIANS

and iago is too nice/shy to say hey i gotta go ive got kids n shit so he just kinda lets it happen

ANYWAY as it happens my main girl Queen Absentia, in trying to find the Guardian that she sired her own brood with (He comes in later) accidentally ends up kidnapping Iago and a few other paladins in the whole “Round up all the guardians and we’ll find him eventually” plan.

Which is a big deal because 1.) He’s the actual clan leader here and you KIDNAPPED HIM 2.) Caroline adopted this child already and SHE IS PISSED AND OUT FOR BLOOD and 3.) Iago is technically the one child (egg really) Absentia had while she was alive way back when and so she’s finally reunited with her baby (that she died protecting) which is kinda wonderful but she’s kinda dead and possessed by the shade and Iago has no clue what she’s talking about so

That’s a huge mess that needs to be sorted out

Eventually she and Iago sort things out and his emotionally fragile ass has to shut down for a little bit because he’s got a mom??? and a sister??? but they’re all shade touched and That’s Bad but also they’re all really nice to him and he needs some fucking sleep

But ofc right as things calm down Mom #2 (Caroline) Kicks the door in with the rest of the Paladins + OG Clan Zenith looking for him and to Destroy the Demons

In the process we have three boss fights;

FIGHT ONE: ARNOST He strong and fast but also a reanimated corpse of someone Caroline & Co knew so they appeal to his dead memories and get him on their side right before he almost kills them (Caroline’s adoption powers save us again)

FIGHT TWO: CROUTON My baby is just, relentless. She and Arnost are just going at it hard and honestly its anyone’s game but eventually Iago wakes the fuck up from his emotion coma and calms them both down, at which point Caroline and the others realize that Crouton is family and adopt her too (she just kinda goes along with it because hey this family thing is new and seem nice and these people are Strong)

so everything is good right? WRONG

FIGHT THREE: momther ABSENTIA

so mommy’s pissed

and everyone is exhausted 

and the weird magic that kept her looking and acting alive up until this point has just worn off

so the fight is long and hard but eventually, in order to defeat Absentia who is too far gone for Iago or Crouton to see her as Mom anymore they all give Caroline the last of their magic/energy to use her Shade Fighting Powers against her. 

But it comes at a price

In a flash of light, they both disappear, and everyone thinks they’re both dead 

Spoiler: only kinda

And this takes us into Arc 2: Finding Mom(s) and Ruling a Kingdom ft. Emelius the Rebel Doppelgänger

Anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk there’s a lot more little details and side stories but i wanted to get the basic plot down somewhere so i don’t forget or at least get it out there in case i never get to writing it

Bonus Super Spoiler: what if, two moms......same body??? :O

[bigbrothernetflix-st]

EPISODE THREE

“this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off!” - nash

HOH: Nash UPSIDE DOWN: Joey & Saira NOMINEES: Brianna & Gina POV: Jacob FINAL NOMINEES: Emma & Gina EVICTED: Gina (11-1), Jake (WALK)

ARIA

https://youtu.be/SyHPQkbxxw8

JOEY

WATCH THIS AGE LIKE MILK:

I feel great!!!!! Nash winning means my ass aint going up, I gave her 2 tokens, and she gave me 1, and I feel fantastic heading into this week

SAIRA

i feel okay about nash being hoh, she wasn't my first choice but i don't think im in any danger of being nominated (hopefully haha) im not sure who i WOULD want to be nominated, i just know who i wouldn't want, so as long as they're okay i'm good!

JEV

I'm once again feeling pretty good this week. I've grown pretty close to Nash since nominating her in week 1 and she told me and Nathan we aren't going up so, there's that! She's told me Gina is going up and will be her target which I'm not thrilled about but hopefully Gina can pull some miracle and win POV. I'm a little worried about Emma and Jake too, as they've both said they haven't spoken to her much which is dumb, bc like hello??? its week 3, i feel esp with Jake, I can understand Emma bc Nash keeps leaving her on read but I don't think Jake has even tried much (crying emoji) So hopefully they can ALSO pull something out

JAKE

FUCK MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate everyone in this game t b h. why can't people just follow with a plan and go through with it like it aint that hard to put your chips on one person from your alliance so youre all safe like........ i dont think these ppl understand strategy and it's TIRING. i frankly am over people relying on their friendships to get themselves through another week bc fucking nash won an alliance-based hoh comp. now we have to deal w this fucking friend group running the house another week. i don't know if i'm safe i'm honestly probably going to be put up??? even tho nash is the one that CONSTANTLY ignores my PMs even tho ive given her paragraphs to respond to... she's gonna do whatever her little friends want her to do. i mean that's what she literally said to me. i was like pls don't nom me <3 and she was like "im not making any promises im just doing whatever the house wants me to do" like girl............ lkjghklsdfjhg what kind of dumbass bullshit response was that. just tell me you're putting me up or you're not. youre a big girl you can make your own fucking decisions.

i give nash what i would give any hoh if they won and that is "i'd never ever nominate you it's never even crossed my mind" and hoping that's enough to make her wanna keep me. she might think im not going after her but, if she's smart, she'll send me out the door this week before i can retaliate. 

im super super worried that jacob will be like oh jev n jake aligned in BBHOS9 u should put them up together since jev nominated you week 1. like i feel like she'd do ANYTHING jacob tells her at this point cuz shes just another one of his sheep so like hoping im good w jacob but he's such a wildcard idfk

at this point im just hoping me or emma don't get put up and if we do there will be a veto to be won and a nash/jacob to come after next so...... period

ARIA

yall i feel so fucking cracked and tired of everything but itS FINE!!! I got this easy peasy!! Im not going to always feel motivated but im doing my best and thats valid baby!!! So lets jump in, first off lets start with a random information dump of things i've collected

-jacob has talked about me w/ nicholas during pasio

-monty and jacob have a connection ( i dont even remember how)

-nathan nash (maybe jacob) obviously tight lmao

-joey monty close

-Jake made a counter alliance to Jacob's (actually joshes) alliance made of me gina saira emma and josh

-josh emma me alliance

-JOEY RECORDS CALLS

-Jake is wary of nathan (but also thinks hes cute ugh)

-told jake im wary of pasio peeps so he might nom them

-Jacob alliance STILL isnt created

-called with josh and told him that jacob is wary that the alliance isnt made yet

-jacob josh have a pregame

-told josh, saira and nick have a pregame

-josh kiki close

-josh thinks saira is a social threat 

-josh prefers jev over nathan

-told monty to talk to jake more

-told joshua jacob is the most connected person

-got back to nash gina doesnt like her

-jacob kiki nash confirmed trio alliance

-nash told jev gina is the target (jev then told jake)

-josh thought jacob was the original maker of the alliance

-jake thinks jacob/josh are snakes

-jake also thinks jacob-josh-nash-kiki-bri-nick-nathan are an alliance

-josh wants to play the middle w/ me :uwu:

 So from here I want to get into how my ideal week will go and how it will realistically go. IDEALLY Nash noms jev and josh with them not winning veto and the house gets rid of a utr social threat but realistically its gonne be gina and jake with gina going bc she doesnt talk to anyone of have any motivation for this game (I LITERALLY WROTE HER A PARAGRAPH TO SEND TO NASH TO NOT BE NOMINATED AND SHE GOES "hmm idk maybe ill send it" LIKE????) 

Okay the other thing im freaking out about is bc i feel like theres tension between me Jacob Josh and Jake and im not sure what it is about. I mean i kinda do but im missing key components. The whole situation just doesn't sit right with me at all and I feel very at odds with them in a weird kinda way. I've explained this so many times but i have such a bad feeling that josh leaked the janelle alliance to jacob and is more with him than me and now josh is setting these two sides against each other and i just heard from him that nash isnt nomming him so now im really uncomfy ughhhh i have such a bad feeling and i really need to work on people like jev saira monty to make sure i have people behind me i can fall back on, but also im getting the vibe jake really really trusts me which is great because i want to go far with him as well, unless hes just misting me SUPER hard ughhh

god i just have such a bad feeling about this week buts its fINE totally fine ill work it out eventually,,,but now its trust ranking time yay

1.Gina (youre so inactive i adore you!)

2.Joshua (kid GANG!!! thank you for trusting me sometimes <3)

3.Jake (hes a crackhead but hes my crackhead)

VERY BIG GAP

4.Emma (shes chilling what a lovely gal)

5.Monty (better inactive than be active and a threat)

6.Nathan (youre kinda sketchy but hes like a funky older brother)

7.Josh (youre at the center of a balancing act i wonder if u can keep it up)

8.Nick (they always give such an honest vibe,,,,,i dont trust it)

9.Brianna (shes so sweet but the sweetest angels make the fiercest demons)

10.Jev(,,,,your on slightly thicker ice than joey but combined with a little more charisma)

ANOTHER GAP WOOT WOOT

11.Joey (youre on THIN fucking ice buddy,,,,please be more open w/ me)

12.Saira (im begging for u to talk game to me,,, but also since we havent talked u cant snake me yet)

13. Jacob (idk ily sm but youre so fcking connected and idk if i reached ur inner circle yet)

14. Kiki (my favorite furry)

15.Nash (please talk to me im begging ill do anything please plsease plaease plae-)

So update ive been talking around and wow this game loves looking at my allies and kicking them in the kneecaps while spitting in their eyes ugh. So nash is probably leaning towards nomming jake and Gina with gina as the target (really weird that jake is nommed makes me think jacob had some influence there) but in that scenario best case is that veto is used and anyone but josh goes up and that person leaves easy fucking peasy!! Anyway i just talked with josh and apparently jacob was the one who came up with the alliance idea which is interesting bc he tried to pin it on josh. Anyways not to totally contradict my initial rant but me and josh had a really good chat where we're kinda in the same position between two groups (the og alliance and janelle) and we dont know if we should make the og alliance and with who bc of janelle so we're struggling to see whats the correct move from here....or maybe josh is completely misting me but i fucking hope not ugh- either way im surviving this week and thats that!!

JEV

I'm realising that I'm getting myself into a pretty tight position since I have firm alliances with Emma & Jake and Nash & Nathan, as well as being extremely close to Josh C, which could prove difficult for me down the line, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

KIKI

https://youtu.be/6cn8xUFWqhA

BRIANNA

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1XvZzg3dTEZ89VeFbG3bxk4JFNtr7Ixm0/view?usp=sharing 

i had to use google drive bc it wouldn't take my file on youtube :((((

JEV

So right now I've somehow accidentally wriggled my way into conspiring with Nash on how best to take Gina out, which is so dumb of me because I don't really want to see Gina leave this week, but at the same time I'm having to fight Nash's decision because she wants to put Emma up beside her and... I can't let that happen because I'm worried Emma would leave over Gina

JEV

So I'm speaking to Nash, taking the heat off of Emma by telling her I feel she could be a number for me/her/Nathan down the line, and now I'm pushing for Brianna to go up since Nash wants someone who 100% wouldn't leave over Gina and I'm thinking like... WHO would vote to evict Brianna, but at the same time I'm feeling super terrible about it because Brianna is a literal angel

JEV

Wow a lot going on so I'm trying to update as best I can, Nash is saying she's going to randomise for who goes to the upside down so I'm having to encourage her not to include me or Nathan in the randomisation just incase she needs us for strategising but REALLY its so I can stay and hang around and try my best to keep Emma from touching the block at all this week.

NASH

sorry for nominating women i didnt mean it.

EMMA

If i am being honest the more this game goes by i get so unmotivated and its only week 3 i suck because well in bbgames like galar and almia i mostly played from the bottom now im like alright i kinda want to fuck up my game for fun but kinda pisses me off a bit that i almost could of been nominated if it wasnt for jev but that pisses me off so much i tried talking to nash but i get left on read i dont take things 100x personal unless if somebody is being mean like laughing etc but knowing that i would be on the block over brianna when i did try talking to nash its still hurts a little but if somebody like gina wins veto if i get on the block it issss what it isss i guess but i played on the bottom way to many times maybe i can do this??

JEV

So my efforts worked and Brianna went up instead of Emma, now I've just gotta hope neither of the noms win POV/that the POV isn't used so I don't have to throw someone elses name out there to Nash :flushed:

JOSH

hello ladies and gays. straights aren't welcome here.

today, we are feeling GOOD because the person we nominated just a few days ago won power and STILL didn't nominate me. is that iconnery or what? i was honestly ready for my ass to be TOAST but i did approach nash before they won HOH and had a conversation about where we stood and they said i would be OKAY this week bc we did start talking. we love to see it, yes we do!

the nominees this week are gina and brianna and.. even though i'm in two different alliances with both of them, i'm not mad at either of them going up. i don't REALLY talk with either and i'd be happy to see either one of them go. the tricky part will be figuring out WHO to vote when the time comes, but we have a POV to happen before we get there. we'll SEE.

if i had to choose, i'd probably send brianna home simply because i find her a bit CHAOTIC where i feel like gina isn't really going to cause a lot of waves with me. she's much more quiet whereas brianna is more likely to be able to pick herself back up.

some other fun events going on:

jake was NOT happy about nash winning and thought he was going to get nominated because of it. he was about to RIP nash a new one and is really brewing with how much he hates them. MAKES ME LAUGH A LIL BECAUSE IT WAS SO UNWARRANTED BUT NEVERTHELESS, it's something to note that jake does NOT like nash.

i think aria is my number one right now bc we get along really well and have very similar opinions. i'm really open with how i talk to her so i'm HOPING she's not spilling everything i say to someone else but i don't think she WOULD? i dunno. i love her energy and i'm hoping we can SLICE AND DICE together in the middle.

my strategy is to take my HOH under my belt and take a step back for a minute while my two alliances (one: jake, aria, gina, emma, saira, me & two: jacob, aria, brianna, kiki, me) get picked off back and forth. i'm going to see if i can craft a narrative for them to go after each other but we'll SEE. there are a lot of people in the middle i enjoy a lot more than some of the people in my alliances so IDK. i feel like some people got thrown into these alliances that i did NOT want but they were kind of forced in so i don't trust it. and i think people KNOW because i'm not very chatty abt it in the chats (and i haven't even made one of the chats. am i supposed to? idk)

anyways that's all for now x 

ARIA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp71zzR-wgE

someone help

JAKE

https://voca.ro/g2ZQWs9x8du

JEV

Not miss Nash coming to me asking how I'd feel about being renom :flushed:

JEV

So I literally just woke up from a sleep and in the space of 30 minutes have had to talk Nash out of renomming me, Emma or Jake since we've just made an alliance together so I warned her that probably wouldn't work out for us in the long run. We narrowed it down and she shortlisted Aria, Josh C, Monty & Nick, and I have spun her to try and get her to nominate Aria, because 1. I don't wanna see Josh C go up and 2. like with Brianna I feel nobody here would vote to evict Aria, and Nash wants Gina GONE (crying emoji) so I feel this was the only logical renom to suggest.

JEV

The conversation has turned back to Emma and I just really don't wanna let that happen because I do feel like she'd leave over Gina. Part of me is saying not to stick my neck out too much to save Emma but at the same time she's my number 1 in this game and I hope she'd return the favour if she was in my position.

NASH

this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off! 

ARIA

Well,,,, FBSFJDF I feel like im making so many of these but honestly this game changes everyday so please dont be too annoyed by me uwu, the mood swing i had just this DAY was insane so lets begin w/ the general info-

IN TIME LINE ORDER

-Jev told jake that something about noms but acted dumb when I asked

-Gina/Joshua/Aria alliance created!!

-Saira and Josh are close

- VIDEO DR GOES HERE

-Jake spills Emma-Jev-Nathan-Nash-Jake alliance with Emma/Jev/Jake being a trio as well= Jev created the alliance

-Jev prefers gina out

-jake doesnt believe in screenshots or recording calls

-Jev and Jake are close

-Jev/Jacob/Jake all played together before

-I leaked Bri's backups to Jake as well as Jacob's trio with Nash and Kiki

-nash almost backdoored jev bc he wasnt responding to her

-jev was the reason i was almost otb

-I WAS ALMOST OTB

-Josh AND Jacob both want Jake out

-Bri thinks nash's comp ability is scary

-Nash and Nick are close 

-Jacob nervous about Bri's backup leaking

-Jacob barely talks w/ saira and monty

-made a final three w/ jacob josh called malibu

So now im debating whether its morally okay for me to analyze what happened in the living room in a game sense. FBSdffan So lets run down things in chronological order and I might mention my thoughts if they arent too controversial, Nathan leaks the alliance with jev/nash/jake/emma. Eventually emma says 'i wanna know who put these thoughts in the hohs head" and nick starts to shut the discussion down which is an interesting contrast to their earlier attitude where they were very for the drama continuing, which leads me to begin they had some sort of hand in it. Nathan goes on to say he likes nash on a personal lvl which jake analyzes as a nod to a friendgroup and a mini confrontation between nathan and jake occur. I believe that part was just a misunderstanding on both parties account. Then happy discussion until Jake calls nash out for being in the diary session for too long which leads to a discussion of house guests over analyzing production and using that as a strategy which is ultimately unfair and also at this time I believe nash was going through itTM leading to their friends to be slightly defensive on their behalf (which is valid) and i after rereading things i really hope that they're okay, ultimately this leads up to frustration on Jake's part and his ultimate quit. 

I mean where do i go from here? I have the Bri's angels but that did get leaked to Emma on Jake's way out so i need to figure some way to micromanage that where i think im gonna make a emma jev alliance and work with them as a trio in the future (if gina goes) but rn i feel like this force of energy that is Bri's backups is gonna body for a bit but i think theyre gonna throw hoh leading me jev or emma to step up and body a bit. Like i think i might actually win hoh and nom nash and monty with a nick potential renom bc im BORED and nash continuing to skate by without even talking to me is not valid, and monty is so not here its like??? HEWWO??? but idk thats making big moves i may just chill a bit for now but i dont want jev and emma being targeted in the future bc theyre gonna be numbers for me and thats on PEWIOD!

HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L25lY813N1k&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=4&t=0s

[angeltriestoblog]

The One With All The Books: My favorites + tips on how to get out of your reading slump!

Ever since I was a kid, I've been obsessed with books: while most children I knew then were preoccupied with Barbie dolls and battleships, I immersed myself in fictional worlds and found trusty companions in protagonists who embarked on adventures that transcended the limits of the physical universe. Back then, I would sleep with them under my pillow, read them in the backseat of our family car even on rather turbulent road trips, and turn to them during boring class discussions.

Over time, they ended up shaping my opinions and world views, fueling my hunger for knowledge, and inspiring me to put my own thoughts down on paper. It's safe to say I wouldn't be the person I am now, had it not been for my love for the written word. Which is why I find it odd that I haven't made any of the standard recommendation posts that would normally be found on the personal blog of someone like me. In an attempt to fix that, I'm sharing with you my eight favorites of all time, not only to give them a fitting tribute (that will still not be able to do their profound impact any justice), but also encourage you to pick up a good read! Who knows, maybe it'll change your life as much as it did to mine!

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle

As a kid, I loved both science and fiction, but always saw them as two concepts completely opposite from each other. When I found out that they could marry and live in perfect harmony in a genre of their own, I was over the moon. It was exciting enough, getting to teleport across universes by folding the fabric of space and time, encounter terrifying creatures who somehow parallel actual people on Earth, and learn about obscure scientific concepts. But, the fact that it manages to tie in the triumph of good over evil, and the power of familial love was just the cherry on top for me. I brought this with me everywhere I went for a solid two months, obviously with good reason.

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

My mom had recommended this to me in high school, and I put off buying it for so long because I originally thought I was "too old to be reading stuff like that". Much to my surprise, what was practically disguised as a children's book, with its simple prose and watercolor illustrations, served as both as a moral allegory and criticism of the way adults operate in today's world. Though its length can trick you into thinking it's a fast read, most passages demand to be looked at a second time, reflected on, and shared to the nearest person—if you're the type to protest against annotating, you might have to rethink your stance.

Inkheart by Cornelia Funke

When I was in grade school, my parents had this rule where I was only allowed to buy a new book during special occasions, to control the growing number we had piling up in our house. I remember seeing this in the NBS branch in Glorietta, and having to wait until the end of the quarter to ask my parents to get it for me. Oh, well: as the cheesy saying goes, "True love waits." Although if there is anyone who loves books more than I do, it's Meggie Folchart, as she has inherited her father's gift of bringing fictional characters to life. But, when disaster strikes, as it always does, she must learn how to harness this special power and save her family. The world-building and imagery is unbelievably rich, Funke doesn't just paint a picture in your head: she creates a whole ass movie. No wonder eight year-old me put her up on a pedestal.

To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before (the entire series, but maybe the third was my favorite) (ok it was, don't tell the two others) by Jenny Han

The blurb at the back of the book certainly doesn't do it justice: I remember finding this at a nearby Fully Booked and putting it down instantly, dismissing it as another cliche YA novel. Sure, Lara Jean Covey has to deal with all five of her unsent love letters to her crushes being mysteriously sent out, but she also grapples with important issues such as identity, family, and—in the third book—the future. I read Always and Forever, Lara Jean during the summer before I entered university, and every single line resonated with me so much I paused at the end of every chapter to take a crying selfie. Plus, Peter Kavinsky is my literary dream boy: if I ever expect my future significant other to take me on a cross-country road trip to go antique shopping, they'll only have him to blame.

Why We Broke Up by Daniel Handler

We're taught that we shouldn't judge books by their covers, but I'm glad my twelve year old self decided to brush that aside when she bought this. Although I didn't end up reading it until five years after, I devoured the thick hardbound in a day and a half, and was reduced to a ball on my couch shortly afterwards. I know the book has the most self-explanatory title, but it's just that it takes on the universal experience of first love and heartbreak so authentically. The stream of consciousness writing style and slow pacing may be an issue for some, but I reckon it adds to its charm, as it allows Min to take readers through all the motions of a relationship in a way so relatable, entering her headspace feels like slipping into a second skin.

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey

A friend of mine in high school had complained to me that her mother had made this required reading for her, and I suggested I'd take it off her hands for a bit. I ended up going through her copy thrice in a month. (Ah, what I would give to go back to the days when I could still afford to read on school days.) An issue a lot of books that claim to "change your life" have is that they elaborate on these supposedly groundbreaking ideas, yet fail to break them down into doable action steps. Fortunately, Covey shares his practical advice in a structured manner, complete with examples, illustrations, and the occasional dad joke, freeing it from any preachy or condescending undertones. I don't know how to say that this is the only self-help book you'll ever need without sounding like someone from the Home Shopping Network.

When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi

This paperback intimidated me from the moment I first saw it on a shelf, because of the metaphorical title and steep price. But, good thing I got around to buying it eventually: this harrowing story is told by a promising doctor with his whole life ahead of him, who turns into a patient as soon as he is diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer. Reading this was difficult, because I knew that no matter how hard I tried to dissect and reflect on the questions of life and death being posed by the author, I could never come close to understanding how he felt. But, that didn't make the experience any less necessary.

Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

Creativity is a rather difficult concept to talk about in depth, because it seems so abstract. This is why the author advises readers to treat it as a living entity: one that bestows the best of ideas to those who nurture it, complements the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, and demands our full participation despite the looming presence of fear. I finished this on a school bus ride home from school, and the minute I got home, I marathoned Gilbert's TED talks and keynote speeches on YouTube: there is a distinctly tender, somewhat spiritual quality in the way she speaks about her craft, that easily makes you hang on to and follow every word she says.

Now I know books aren't everyone's go-to when looking for a way to pass the time: I've heard people say that they can't find time for it, that there's nothing out there that piques their interest, or they simply don't have the patience, given that social media posts and Netflix shows practically hold our attention spans captive in this day and age. While all are valid points, they can clearly be worked around! I was in a funk during the start of my Christmas break, because I hadn't touched a non-academic book since the new school year had started. But, I managed to finish four in the span of a month, and am currently on my fifth, as of this writing. Here are some tips I have, just in case you want to kick your reading slump in the ass as well.

Start small. Like with any habit you want to build, introduce the behavior in small increments: five push-ups, five minutes of meditation, fifty pages of a novella. Then, once you're starting to get the hang of it again and you don't feel your two brain cells shrieking for help because they can't figure out if "lived" is an actual word in the English language, you can increase it depending on your progress. This happened to me when, thanks to a notably bad case of tsundoku, I had amassed 14 (!!!) unread books in a year. I decided to tackle as soon as my vacation started, so I kicked it off with a rather easy read: Matilda by Roald Dahl, 232 pages thin, with numerous drawings.

Read something you'd actually enjoy! It's gonna be hard to stay engaged in something that doesn't excite or entice you: reading is supposed to be a hobby, not a household chore. Find something written on an interest of yours, a field of study that you've always been curious about, a person that you've looked up to for forever: I truly believe that there is no topic that hasn't been written about at this point in time.

On a somewhat related note, don't be afraid to DNF books that don't satisfy you. A lot of us pick books up because everyone else loves it, and are afraid to put it down for the fear of being othered. But, if we've all come to believe that we should sever ties with people who no longer serve us, what makes it any different for books that just don't touch our lives? I remember reading The Bell Jar when I was 13 because it came highly recommended by someone on Instagram who I found really cool. It was far too heavy for me, but I couldn't find the heart to shelf it especially after how much it cost me.

Remember that physical copies are not the only way to go. Thanks to the presence of audio and e-books, one can now enjoy stories anywhere and any time, without the daunting feel of several pages, or the burden of lugging around heavy hardbounds. (Although you are missing out on one of the best parts of reading: new book smell. Your loss.) One might find it easier to process the information this way, or even appreciate whatever the author has to say.

Talk about it with a friend! They could help keep you accountable in following through your reading goals, give you solid (and sometimes even personalized) recommendations, or accompany you in mourning over the death of a major character. It's always been a dream of mine to start or join a book club for these exact reasons, but I'm afraid this post is possibly the closest I could get to that right now. Nevertheless, I'd love to hear your suggestions and give you more of my own! Drop me a message here (or here, here, and here!) if ever you're interested.

Love and light,

Angel