#hhhhh five... months.. later

[cosmobrain00]

hey evryone !! chapter 14 of Moonlight on the River is FINALLY up for anyone who wants to read btw<3

[castle-dominion]

c4x14 the blue butterfly THIS EPISODE IS SO GOOD I WAS SO HAPPY THE FIRST TIME I WATCHED IT & I WATCHED THE AUDIO COMMENTARY & NOW I GET TO LIVEBLOG IT IDK IF I'LL BE ABLE TO GET THROUGH THE EPISODE TODAY BC IT IS THAT GOOD I WILL HAVE TO PAUSE IT AFTER EVERY LINE I SWEAR

Starting off sexy af, love the music love the costuming (even tho 40s colours were not ideal) love the singing love TJ/LP/BS love everything about this ugh I am dying & I have played maybe five seconds of the episode Ugh the way they talk mmmm I remember when I first watched casablanca & then it was ages until I had the chance to see double indemnity (which actually takes place 10y before this but shush) & heck the way we start off in the middle with castle/JF doing the investigation mmmmjsfhkjhdsjfs it's just sooo good so good so good. "I'm lookin at her" hhhh their eyes meet across the bar aaaaah this is so good.

You know before they flashed forward I thought this might have just been an AU.

Love this fellow's outfit she's so new york. Is ship coming in a figure of speech? We've heard it before. Does it just mean they are coming into money or getting something good like a job promotion? JE: Well, if you can remember anything else, can you please give me a call? SRO manager: Don’t hold your breath, hot shot. *walks out* KR: I think she likes you.

Banks: [we last spoke] Two months ago, which is crazy, ‘cause there was a time we couldn’t go two hours without talking. Glad s2 rysposito aren't here bc espt would make fun of ryan for calling jenny sm. Maybe he was an entomologist. Yo stan owes someone A Lot of money

KR: Just a bunch of books about mobsters and Manhattan in the ‘40s. Castle should read them. he'd probs enjoy them & he's a speedreader too. Ooh the diary! RC: Uh, this diary in Stan’s stuff, it’s also from the ‘40s. It sounds like it belonged to a private eye. Listen to this. “Usually wives turn on the waterworks when shown pictures of their husbands stepping out, but not this dame. She wanted payback. So what’s worse, that I pitched woo with a client, or that I invoiced her for services rendered after?” espt sounds so good when he uses the term "right on" I like it RC: Um, Beckett? Can I take this home for the night? I mean, it might be the key to what Stan was looking for. KB: You just want to read it because you think it’s cool. RC: Yeah, well, that, too. KB: Okay, just so long as…you… [Castle is already walking off with it.] KB: Bring it back in the morning.

Mmm music, old diaries, this is so good. I love the transition bc I could hardly tell what with the VO & the bourbon. Joe Flynn/Rick Castle: So, I figured I’d kill two birds with one stone with a little hair of the dog that bit me. What does that mean?

Oh Martha/Florence Kennard I love! Ugh the outfit the coat the accents & vernacular mmm! The way the characters have a bit of their counterparts in them is so good. Kennard is just enough like martha & susan sullivan can play her so well

How did you know it would change your life? When are you writing this diary? Is it the evening after today or is it days later or what? After the case entirely? Picture of map of manhattan in the 40s. Oh that accent is... something. Gosh alexis is a baby how is she a married woman? hhhhh I can't say everything I love abt it "my shingle" Was her name really vera mulqueen? Was sally's maiden name sally mulqueen? *dabs her eyes* $15 in 1940 is worth $325.85 today or at the time, what 2012? $245.99 in 2012. That much a day plus expenses, hoo that's a lot Ugh the costumes, the acting, the preproduction... JF/RC: Looking at that photograph, all I could think was… Me: Hot dang? JF/RC: what a beautiful doll.

Ugh the scenes of the city jjghhjkfhghg

I KNOW THAT GUY HE IS MR SCOFFIELD I THINK, FORSHADOWING OMG Satchmo Besty Sinclair <3 ugh she sings so well. & I love this music & I love dancing but I do better with big band music I think. I would loooove to dance there. Shrapnel in my hip? From ww2? Well I love how we get to learn about So Much of the character but it is only mentioned in passing. He is such a big character but we only get these little pieces of him & it was just one mention of shrapnel but it tells us a lot about his character. She's pretty af! & you can see dempsey there in the background. gorillas lmao is that what you called your henchmen back then? You got it boss. RC/JF (V.O.): What was I thinking? This dame was trouble on two legs. I kept telling myself to look away. [A tough-looking man steps up next to Beckett/Vera.] RC/JF (V.O.): She was with Tom Dempsey, for crying out loud – the most ruthless mob boss New York has ever given birth to. [Beckett/Vera kisses Dempsey on the cheek.] Ooh his outfit! RC/JF (V.O.): Dempsey sent over two of his gorillas – an Irishman and a Cuban on loan from some Havana mob family. You can loan henchworkers? [Ryan/irishman and Esposito/cuban tough-walk over to Castle at the bar.] Esposito looks almost normal but ryan looks way out there. KR/Moxie: The boss wants to see you, boy-o. Ooh that accent tho. (my canadian ass first thought "newfie" lol but they say bo'y not bowy or they even say b'y) RC/JF: Sorry, boys. My dance card’s full. JE/Cuban: This isn’t a request, compadre. *shows his gun* That accent too They get to have fun & play other characters. But the characters are not too far off. Their ties too btw, wowie

& the music! Audio mirroring! RC/JF: The waiter? I’ll take a whiskey. The boys here can share a sloe gin fizz. LMAO Great fight scene! Going to clip that for sure! Words cannot describe how I feel about this. (noo not the kitchen! ugh the way he picks him up) & ngl that booty as he throws him into the alley? Nice.

RC, probably not what JF actually said: You should see what my face did to the other guy’s fist. Vera/KB is wearing the fur over her neck entirely. Covering up the goods. Que passando? I speak french not spanish but is that "what's going on?" like "what has passed?" Doesn't put the tapped R before the D, yeah lol. Ah finally revelas the necklace!

Woah that was kind of jarring to jump back to present day but heck yeah! RC: The Blue Butterfly. It’s a necklace. That’s why Stan Banks was killed. Why am I narrating? Because you were just imagining this guy's day while reading his narration & bc it's what hot girls do. u never talk to yourself? ig it is different from narrating...

OMG WHAT A SEXY INTRO THERE

Ok so what I know from acting is from the moment you hit the set you need to use your accent, you cannot just slip it on & off easy so filming the ryan parts & the henchone parts must have been, well, something. Gosh I can't believe we only get one audio commentary of this ep. I want more, more I say! Also I like ryan's patterned red tie & red vest but that striped shirt? The only reason it's ok is bc he is mostly covering it with the vest. It has red stripes. He has a lot of buttons on the sleeves of his jacket. American flag lapel pin today. With smth else ig. Ooh blue diamonds. I miss when blue diamonds were sexy & white diamonds were just there. RC: *passes his papers to ryan* KR: *shows it to Beckett as if castle didn't already hold em up for her to see*

RC: Turns out the Blue Butterfly disappeared sometime in the ‘40s, and rumor has it, it’s hidden somewhere in The Pennybaker Club. If he found it…a million dollar-necklace? Talk about motive for murder. By the way, Ryan, say “boy-o.” [meaning he really was imagining these people in these positions] KR: *looks up from the papers castle gave him* Boy-o. RC: “Boy-ohhh.” KR: Boy-o. RC: “Boy-o.” KR: Boy-o. RC, accented: “Boy-o.” KR: Boy—O. ??? *looks to beckett* [they go back to talking about the case & rick doesn't get nazi gold but SS officer diamonds which is the same thing. Cursed necklaces? stealing stuff from nazis? mob bosses? this is right up castle's alley.] KB: Okay, Ryan, you see if you can get a hold of the bookie. Castle and I will go back to the crime scene. KR: Okay. RC: Boy-o' KR: Boy-o RC: Boy-o' KR: Boy-O RC: Like a leprechaun. KR, with an angry "ew" face: Castle! RC: Sorry.

RC: Can you blame the guy? I mean, she was gorgeous. Castle how do you know? You are reading it not seeing it. You are imagining beckett there. I was too caught up in the story to think about the "animosity back home" they kept saying Castle is so right. Minor hidden safe, very hidden secret safe. I love how castle insists on telling the story to get to the part abt the safe. RC: Well, people didn’t waste time back in the ‘40s

Oh gosh look at her dress... lmao the transition

KB: Did you just say, “Kate”? Are you picturing the P.I. as you, and me as the gangster’s moll? RC: What? No. And I didn’t say “Kate”. I said “Fate”. “Fate’s heart quickened.” I was being poetic. (chuckles nervously) God. Anyway, as I was saying, they were just about to kiss when… Why not just read from the diary & say the PI was being poetic? Maybe she would read it & call him out tho. Or ig he was reciting from memory

Oh I love the collar on Esposito/Cuban Henchone rn! Raises his fists like that lol & then Besty/Lanie saves the day & gosh that is a good kiss. "mixed laundry" XP Betsie/Lanie almost sounds normal lol

Two Brunos? Interesting word. Well they are not here right now actually so...??? So you became the girl of a mob boss to wear his jewelry? That's it? That's the reason?

KB & me: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT'S IT? I'M NOT ONLY INTERESTED IN THE SAFE I'M ALSO INTERESTED IN THE STORY. btw I like her coat with that red scarf it's v pretty. KB: Well, why would you tell a story when you don’t know the ending? RC: If you wanted a beginning and a middle and an end, I have 27 novels you can choose from. XD

Ray Horton: Stan? And who— who killed him? KR: JE: RH: Me? Why would I kill my business partner? 10g for a diary?

RC: So, I traced the diary. Stan did his research. He purchased it from the granddaughter of Joe’s old secretary, a woman by the name of Ruth Huntsacker. Ah that's where the diary came from KB: Look, Castle, I admit that Joe and Vera’s story is fun and romantic, but whatever happened back in 1947 has nothing to do with who murdered Stan. RC: Uh… (chuckles) I’m not so sure about that. Our bookie alibied out. But ballistics came in, and we got a match. The .38 caliber revolver that killed Stan was used in an unsolved double homicide…in 1947. WOAH NOW THIS IS GOOD. This is so so sexy. Ok so vera mulqueen is her name so sally scoville probably made that mistake when meeting joe flynn on purpose.

RC: Murdered. That’s too bad. I really thought those two crazy kids were gonna make it. KB: Yeah, not exactly the ending I was hoping for. RC: I didn’t even know ballistics went back that far. Me, who watches murdoch mysteries: Oh ho ho! The man also invented blood types & fingerprints & tape & silly putty & (he didn't actually invent any of this he's a fictional character) KB: You know what? I bet you Dempsey caught the two of them trying to run away together, and he killed them. But how does Stan’s killer get Dempsey’s gun sixty years later? KR: Unless Dempsey killed Stan. He’d be, what, like 90 years old? But it’s still possible. RC: Couldn’t have been Dempsey. He died of a heart attack four months after Joe and Vera were killed. KR: Ah. RC: Still…we should dig up that 1947 police report. There could be something in there about the gun that could shed some light on Stan’s murder. KR, resigned: All right. I’ll go to the warehouse and I’ll pull up the old case files. RC: Oh, wai- oh, uh…I want to go. KR: ? *looks to becks* KB: *shrugs* KR: Uh…okay. RC: Can I drive? KR: I don’t care. RC: OwO!!! Espt always make ryan take passenger & beckett never lets castle drive so this is fun. But is it a police car or a personal one? bc castle is probs not allowed to drive if it is a police car.

Belasco is pretty for an old guy. Watercrafter lookin dude.

Someone else accessed your police files? Nice location u got here. Different place to film in. RC: Damn it, Joe. You old sap. Dizzy with a dame and got yourself cooked. KR: So, Mr Bogart, what exactly are we looking for here?

CB: Of course not. When I asked to see the alleged diary, he refused, and yet, he wanted access to all my research on The Pennybaker Club. I mean, really, the whole thing was absurd. Yeah that is kind of rude...

Esposito's hair is... interesting. Short but long enough that he brushes it & parts it.

KR: It feels like we’re looking for a needle in a haystack, except for, we can’t find the haystack. RC: Who needs a haystack when the needle is right here? Wait I just realized-- where did they get that previous photo of tom dempsey?? Wait nvm it was in castle's internet search along with the initial photo of the blue butterfly

Love the transitions "Hatchet men" lol Doyle, my nova scotian uncle has that last name. Lots of scottish & irish immigrants there obv. It's like newfoundland but less intense. Then PEI is like nova scotia #2. RC/JF: So every clover-loving Irishman worth his salt will be huddled around a radio tonight, cheering good ol’ Jimmy on. You’re gonna wait till a rousing part of the fight. Then you’re gonna excuse yourself. Whoever’s assigned to be watching you surely won’t be paying much attention. That’s when you slip right out the back door, where I’ll be waiting for you. that's way too easy. No way theyre going to let that happen But hey they are both so good looking. JF/RC: Look at me. I’m a new man. I’m a better man. I haven’t even had a drink since I met Vera, Girl it's been like a week. Then again for someone who consistently drank himself to sleep in his office, maybe this is a miracle. What if she doesn't have a sister HA I WAS RIGHT

KR, with his cheek in his hand, listening: What happens next? [btw I like his wedding ring, it's rly pretty. & also I love seeing it, he is In Love.] RC: I don’t know. That’s the end of the statement. KR: But if Sally wasn’t Vera’s sister, then who was she? [I love how castle is getting everyone invested in this story] RC: Sally set up the P.I. It’s a classic film noir twist. KR: But whhhy? RC: I don’t know. :D KR: What was Sally up to? [Ryan he only knows as much as you do! He may be a writer but you are a detective] RC: I don’t know. :D KR: Do you think she was connected to Dempsey? *takes the file* RC: I don’t know, :D but isn’t this great? KR: KR: *double take from castle to the file to castle*

YESS THE ADVENT OF WEST SIDE WALLY At least espt excuses himself before taking the call. That's the polite thing to do. Becks sharing the file with some other detective there. the little things make the show

Man has a wedding ring... WOAH TOM DEMPSEY Nice outfit! the makeup team possibly could have done a bit more to make him look related to tom dempsey not genetically identical to him imo but whatever that's just me Wait no maybe they did do enough about it I think. it's good.

So how do you know his real name was stan? Pillar in the community...? Oh guest book at betsy's funeral, that's how he figured it out. TD: No, I did not—I did not shoot him. Stan—Wait. Stan did find it? KB: Come on. You tell us. TD: I don’t know. I was not there! "was not" rather than "wasn't" I like it

Ok espt what are you wearing? Today you are wearing a dress shirt & a tie which is nice (if different from your frequent pyjama look) but grey on grey with THOSE greys does not work bud.

Ah good grammar <3 Jerry Maddox was the old bartender??? (But ik how this goes, why would he sign his name that way in the guest book?) JE: Good job, Castle. RC, like a puppy: Yeah? JE: .. Yeah.

The med guy calls him jerry too. I see. Aw she offers homemade soup <3 Beautiful blue eyes on this man, love the old music too. JM: but I was just a bartender back then What did you become later then?

Ooh interesting, he says: Of course. It was a big deal back then. Dempsey, the fella that owned the club, shot them in cold blood. So confirming the story But then when rick asks: The same year, do you remember a woman named Sally Scofield? She was a redhead. In 1947, she would’ve been about 18. JM looks really confused like he doesn't know her. Which would make sense for Jerry Maddox, but he looks overly confused bc he is JF trying not to reveal that he, well, you know.

Gina? Ooh different person narrating! Except... not really a different person narrating ; ) Drops the pretty girl for a new, younger, pretty girl. Ew. Then again she was there bc she wanted to wear his bling RC: & Sally? JM: Couple months after, uh, Vera and that P.I. got whacked, Dempsey died of a heart attack. RC: (yea I asked abt sally bro) JM: The evening of his funeral, in walks Sally, all dressed up. Ordered a whiskey neat, slammed it back, gave me a big ol’ crocodile grin, said she was free. Then she strutted on out the door, and that’s the last time I ever saw her. Interesting claim... it's a revenge story. It would be SO good from the other point of view, you're in the hold of a mobster & then he dumps your mom for the younger prettier thing & mum kills herself with pills bc this pretty girl wanted bling & your mob daddy wanted a pretty girl so you kill the pretty girl & probably kill the mobster too? That would be good except we know it didn't happen like that & it ends up a tragedy. RC: Somehow she used the P.I. to do it. JM: >:(

KR, pink shirt no tie, cute af as usual: So…West Side Wally. May I call you Wally? WSW: I prefer West Side. I LOVE HIM SM WSW: Whoa. Cagney and Lacey, [XD] you can stop right there. I wasn’t living in the club two days ago. I had already gotten bought out by the other guy. [but u leave your sleeping bag & stuff?] KR: Bought out? JE: By the other guy? yeah babes that's what he said. I love west side, he's great.

No he cannot do his show from prison b'y Oh & again he looks good he has nice style too. Bull whip. That's cool ig. lol so dramatic holding his hand as he says stan was holding the necklace Sure bestie.

Wasn't it so that she could kill vera or smth but dempsey did it for her so she ended up faking his heart attack instead & she killed the one who stole her mother's spot & the man who dumped her mom? Except wait why would maddox only see her in 1946? Maybe that's when he started idk. Do you trust what a man has to say abt shoes? Also there are many pairs of shoes, they could have both had those shoes... except then you said she'd be wearing heels. RC: Beckett, I just realizes something. KB: ? RC: "I Can't Give You Anything But Love." KB: ???? Ouh louis armstrong Satchmo! But listen maybe he played this club many times & that's why they BOTH fell in love with his music.

the fear on their faces when they get called by their old names <3 so good (sad)

He really really sounds like Castle's Joe Flynn when he says: Lady, you got it all wrong. WHOA THE MED AIDE? Huntsacker? His mom sold the diary. Her gramma was mrs kennard. He's back here after all this time. yk that's a good point. He is gently being a spy but then some other guy bullies them lol. But for how long were these two pretending to be the bartender? Frankie Benjamin Huntsacker the aide called him jerry earlier when the detectives came to talk.

"Bushwhack" lol

GASP THE BLUE BUTTERFLY Ugh the MUSIC tho! *casually touches it with his hands* How much of it was paste? Apparently the one they actually made was made of blue sapphires & they auctioned it off for charity. There are plenty of minerals that you can use in place of diamonds. Moissanite & white sapphires are both subs for diamonds. I'm sure blue sapphires can replace blue diamonds, except blue diamonds are typically not as coloured as a good quality blue sapphire.

Joe you said that any irishman worth his salt would be around the radio, not the cuban & mob boss too. I can't believe dempsey let her go but ig he was focussing on the fight. Hoo that leg The ice? Oh the bling, the diamonds Oof she just killed lenny! Yeah Sally was totally a victim! That's sooo cool they just ran away & burned the bodies & UGH THAT'S SO GOOD I'VE BEEN WANTING TO LEARN HOW TO LIGHT A MATCH ON MY THUMB FOR YEARS They probably lied tbh... You know, didn't want to get caught for a murder they did so many years ago, they did not struggle for the gun & have it accidentally go. Girl it is not up to YOU to decide. Tho I do like your decision. JF: We don't know how to thank you RC: I do Ok but here's the thing, how would they get by without the money they were going to get from this thing? Also hold on didn't this guy have a fake? The writer believes it was always a fake, castle believes it was switched out back in the 20s, Jerry & Viola (Joe & Vera) seem to think that they hid the BB but Frankie got his hands on a fake... idk I KNEW the brick would be a thing! Oh the music <3 RC/JF: Let the bastard spend the rest of his life not knowing his prized possession is right under his nose. Love <3 <3 <3 woah that dog! Tell them it was fake or tell them someone found it? The way he pulls her in like that <3 ALWAYS <3 <3 <3 How did they make it without the money from the BB tho? That's why they concocted this plan in the first place Weird ending but So Good I love it! ugh too good! Brilliant!

I am going to transcribe the audio commentary I swear.

this episode is one of my faves & I know I say that abt a lot but DANG this one was golden! So freaking good! So Freaking Good!

[gayandvibin]

Me: *makes a fuckton of annotations for my school sketchbook, really actually tries for once, works on it for the whole 10 weeks I'm off, is really excited about the concept I'm going for*

My art teacher: hmm, idk I just don't see the journey?? I can't SEE, visually, where you're going? When you explain it to me verbally I get it, I just feel like you need to be here to explain it, yknow? I'm sure if I read it, it's there but -

Me, stood there for half an hour:

[yutadori]

i didnt think fixing my sleep sched would be this hard i almost want to give up -nobara voice- gah gah GAH

[2ynjns]

when their fem!friend turns into a 5-year-old || tomorrow x together

scenario: you turned 18 years old a few months after huening kai did and one day you woke up into your five year old self. having to live alone away from your family, you didn’t know what to do so you decided to call your best friends and told them to come to your place as soon as possible.

yeonjun

as soon as he arrives at your place, he is shocked

but lord knows how this man loves kids

HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HE GOT EXCITED SEEING WILL AND BEN FROM TROS?!

Anyway

“y/N?! who’s kid is this?! WHERE ARE YOU?! whY DO YOU LOOK LIKE HER?! IS SHE YOUR HIDDEN LOVE CHILD?!”

“no mf! it’s me! y/n! in my 5 year old self”

he would NOT question how why what where and when

he’s just be like “AWWEEEE Y/NNNNN SO CUTE” and hugs you

would take care of you

he’s going to *try* to help you go back to your normal form

but he’s lowkey praying inside that you’d stay as your 5 year old form

you’d be like >:(( HELP ME PLEASE

and he’d just be like cooing at you

“aweee little baby” “don’t be upset! you’re cuter this way.”

and you’d be like (- _ -)

eventually you would give up asking for his help

so you’d just sit on the couch alone pouting with crossed arms

he’d giggle at the sight and take a picture of you and would send it to the other boys

but he’d cook food for you so you won’t be upset anymore

“do you want some ramen?” and you would be nodding furiously

you’re one hungry babie

then after he cooks you would try sitting on the dining chair but it’s too high

so he’d giggle EVEN MORE and help you up

he would carry you everywhere with any way possible

he’d carry you like a sack, or like a newborn, or like a toddler

he’d most likely follow you around to watch you, like a kid, well technically you are

he would also hold your hands everywhere you go

“jjun, it’s still me, just even smaller.”

“well i still need to follow you around, what if you need help? what if you hurt yourself? look at you and your tiny self.” and he’s gonna shake his head

you took a nap with him on the couch, your tiny form laying on top of him like a baby

then you woke up and you realize you’re at your big form again

BUUUT yeonjun, instead, is in his 5 year old form

“OMG YEONJUN?!?!

soobin

mans is whipped as hell

without question, he’d know that small child inside your house alone is you

he wouldn’t even question if you were another kid or what, he just knows it’s you

WOULD IMMEDIATELY CALL THE OTHER BOYS

not to help you, but to tell you how adorable you looked

he would dress you up and do your hair

he’d treat you like a literal kid

he would dare to help you because he’s enjoying taking care of you

chile- you’d look like his kid no cap

he’d quickly go to the store to buy a cute dress and cute hair accessories

then he’d dress you up and put clips on your hair

“do you also want toys? i’ll get you some.”

you were like “well if you help me get back to my old form, i’d very much appreciate it.”

“uuhmmm… no.”

he would be forgetting your actual form and you’re mentally 18 years old

so when he makes you shit on his lap and play with you like a kid, you’d be like “bro i’m 18”

he’d stop working and stare at you

error 101

“oh yeah huh.”

he loves playing with your hair

treats you like his daughter

just like with yeonjun, you would give up and just let him do whatever he wants to do with you

he would brush your hair and tie it into two pigtails and put two big bows

soobin your hidden infantilization kink is showing LMAO

anyway, you’d need cuddles

so he’s be sitting on your couch and you’d be sitting on his lap, facing him and your face against his chest

rubbing your back and tapping your buttocks like a kid

you’d fall asleep, snoring lightly

few hours later you’d be waking up on the floor, in your normal self

you got up happy

and once you saw a small body laying on your couch, you’re like

(O . O)

“SOOBIN YOU’RE 5!!”

beomgyu

this mf

as soon as you explain to him that you transformed into your younger self….

would make fun of you

and laugh at you

“HAHSJIHSADHHEK Y/N IS A KID HHHHH”

you’d cry, you really didn’t want to make fun off most especially you’re way smaller now and you can’t hit him

so he’d stop and say sorry

he wouldn’t help you either

not because he doesn’t want to, he just don’t know how to

so instead, he’d take you out on an amusement park

and he’d make you have fun in your little self

“do you wanna ride the carousel?”

you’d look at him weirdly while you waddle away from him

“sure i guess.”

you got in the ride and chose the light blue horse

but guess what, because you’re tiny you can’t get on the horse

so he’ll carry you up

and poke fun of you again

“aigoo wittle y/n is even wittle”

then he’d crack a laugh

you’d get upset and pout, then you’d look away

throughout the whole ride you would be looking away from him

not paying attention on what he’s babbling

once you leave the ride he’s kneel in front of you

“did i make you upset? awe i’m sorry” :(

then he’d pat your head

and hug you

you’ll be hugging him back, wrapping your arms around his neck

then, he’d just carry you, legit

and next stop is the ice cream stall

still carrying you

“why did you carry me?” “you walk slow,” you’d roll your eyes

the worker would coo at you and beomgyu

“awee your sister is so cute! here you can have this strawberry ice cream for free!”

then eat it in one bite, “beomgyu, i want more”

the worker is like o.O how??

anyway you got your second ice cream

at the end of the day, beomgyu slept with you in your bedroom. he’s cuddling you as if he’s protecting you from the monsters.

the next morning you felt small hands wrapped around your waist

so you opened your eyes and looked down

“omo. gyu wake up! i’m big now and you’re the small one!”

taehyun

taehyun taehyun tsk tsk

he’s the most rational one

at first he wouldn’t be convinced that it’s you, that you’re the kid

so he’d search for big y/n inside your place

to find out there’s no big y/n around and realizes that the small y/n is the big y/n in the small y/n form

if that makes sense

WELL ANYWAY

he’d sit on the couch, then he’d also sit you on the couch

examine you from head to toe

then he’d just smile widely and lift your small feet

“hehehe so smol”

You: >:(((

he’d pull your hair playfully to annoy you because this man is secretly whipped for you

he just keep on denying it

he’d also take a lot of pictures and videos of you

mostly to keep it and blackmail you with it

he’s the only person who’s gonna try to help you go back to your normal form

although he doesn’t want to, he’d still help you

“how did you turn like... this small?”

you blinked and sipped the chocolate milk that he gave you

“i woke up like this.”

(-_-) “y/n you’re not beyonce”

>>:((( “i’m not lying! i literally woke up and i’m 5 instead of 18!” you fought

you crossed your arms which made you spill the chocolate milk on your shorts

*shakes head*

he’d try to look for clothes in your closet that would fit your small body

but no clothes meh meh

he’d quickly run to the nearest store and get you the cuTEST jumper set and headband

he just found it cute, d w he doesn’t have a bad dollification/infantilization kink unlike soob

he’d also grab some tteokbokki on the way

lowkey worried if you were doing okay alone at your place

but like even though you’re mentally 18, you’re still physically 5 so for some reason he thinks you’re lowkey incapable not in a bad way tho

my god you would devour the tteokbokki

“jeez, don’t eat like a kid.” and wiped your mouth

you sitting in the chair with stacks of pillow to boost you up, also waddling your feet since it doesn’t reach the ground

“technically, i AM a kid.” *munches on tteokbokki*

while you’re bored on the floor, laying on your stomach, taehyun is just on his phone

you had no idea but he’s quietly searching about your situation

you suddenly fell asleep

he heard your snores

he cooed and guess what

more videos!

he also fell asleep on the floor, both of you laying on your stomach and facing each other

around midnight you felt a sudden urge to drink water

so you opened your eyes

and yoU SCREAMED

“TAE YOU’RE A CHILD!!!!!”

huening kai

this loud mf will scream once he steps inside your place to see a child sitting on the floor holding your phone

“Y/N WHO IS THIS KID?!”

“shut up! i’m y/n! get your butt over here and help me!”

he was lowkey scared to be near you

but he’s be sniffing you, lifting your arms and legs

then he’d giggle

“heh you’re cute.”

he’d take you to his dorm actually

although all the boys are there cooing at you and babying you, you’re just in kai’s room mostly

he’d give you all his plushies

compare your size with his plushies’ sizes

then he’d giggling some more

once you felt a little tired you laid in his bed with arms open looking up in the ceiling

“being a kid is boring.”

next think you know he’s rubbing your belly

WILL RUB YOUR BELLY NON STOP

okay but you know how kid’s bellies are usually rounded and not flat?

exactly

that’s why kai loves to rub your belly

he’d give you piggy back rides

don’t really know how to baby you because he’s a baby himself

but he understand your baby nature

babies unite!!!

he’d let you braid his hair or tie it

you’d be sitting in the couch and him on the floor while you put random clips on his hair

then the other boys would videotape it

“look at both of our babies… aigooooo!” -txt

would make cupcakes together

your little self would just be passing the ingredients to him while he does all the work

but hey it’s still teamwork yk

after both of you would be high of sugar

very very energetic

also is obsessed with your laughs

the pitch is higher and cuter

so he’d purposely make you laugh

and he’d be clapping bc of how adorable you are

would ask the older boys to order you food just for you too

“c’mon hyung, little y/n is hungry”

“just tell us that YOU are hungry”

still ends up ordering a lot of food

you’re slurping the jjajangmyeon and he’s be hella ready to wipe your mouth for you

would also clip your hair back

but he’d accidentally pinch your scalp instead

“kai, that hurts!”

“eeehhh sorry :””(“

after eating all the food

you’d be knock out on his bed

then him next to you

both of yall cuddling a plushie each

he wakes up first tho

“y/n wake up! you’re normal!”

you opened your eyes to see a 5 year old kai

“am i dreaming or you’re 5?”

[mannatea]

gilbert... no, gustave.... 👀

patricia is hte death knight? mmmmaybe? hmmmmm

love that fleche the spy is still just hanging around

loved killing my old pals my old chums

annette went up and crit the shit out of edelgard though so that was cool

dimitri u got le stabbed because u are le dumb

oh cool

“they all died and left me behind” yeah and this man will too. it’s cause ur mediocre

“fuck off boi nobody died for you” lol

i’m like -_- about rodrigue because honestly like...kiiinda assumed he’d kick the bucket since he wasn’t fully recruitable to my knowledge and uhhh dimitri had to slow down his feral slobbering or i was gonna have to put him down myself, so. love it when characters die to calm down other characters that’s super fun. almost as fun as when they die to motivate them. /sarcasm

look at that, the man took a nap

his almost complete switch of personality is unsettling af

anyway everyone all “but what about rhea” i mean i get it but like...it’s been five years. what’s another couple months at this rate lol

oh hey felix called dimitri by name whoa wild

felix doesn’t seem that torn up about his dad’s death

i guess he

lol

died like a true knight

fINALLY sylvain is like, “i don’t know if i can forget the stuff dimitri did tho” cause like jfc was nobody gonna say that?? 

even felix is like surprisingly nice, though kinda pissed at the idea of people knowing that he feels that his dad woulda been glad to die if he could see how much it helped dimitri. bet that stings a bit, eh lad?

oh god so many supports...

catherine x dimitri C = “look at that young maiden wielding a giant lance! how adorable!” “i was thrown off by your haircut!” please tell me it was a bowl cut. but seriously that was a nice lil support

dedue x dimitri B = hhhhh goddamn this is the good stuff this is the delicious lord/vassal shit we love to see

ashe x dimitri B = it’s okay, good to see ashe’s heart being acknowledged as pure, especially by dimitri

mercedes x dimitri B = “teach me to sew!” lol ok i’d think this was cute but it’s mostly like...kinda eh to me. he’ll be a king he won’t need to know how to mend anything. i feel like this is just fluff without much thought in it, even if it’s pretty wholesome.

ingrid x dimitri B = “glenn truly loved you” damn boi right out the gate. also yikes at the shit ingrid is saying... i bet she’d have loved chatting it up with her former future father-in-law because they both really out there like “he died a true knight” i mean whatever brings you peace but JEEZ... stay away from felix. at least dimitri also thinks it’s fucked up LOL. but then ingrid immediately contradicts what rodrigue said when he died which is “glenn gave his life for you” HAHAHA geez. this conversation is mega cringe. finally though, ingrid is the one who is kinda messed up. honey ur living in a fantasy land even though you scolded ashe already that legends aren’t reality. :U

flayn x dimitri C = “there were a few suspiciously crunchy bits here and there” god it’s true then...dimitri doesn’t give a shit what he eats he has NO bar for food quality. son...do you not have tastebuds. this was cute tho. feels REAL fuckin weird after the timeskip tho.

dimitri x sylvain B = DIMITRI HIDING IN SYLVAIN’S ROOM LOL. okay sure. “it’s a what” “does she have a dagger, dimitri” “nobody’s ever accused you of being funny” goddamn sylvain i didn’t give you permission to bully dimitri but i guess it’s fair.

speaking of daggers are we gonna loot that from edelgard’s corpse later? that’d be fucked up

annette x dimitri B = okay but i want to hear the stories about how they were as littles

dimitri x gilbert c = was okay, not really that exciting if i’m being honest.

dimitri x felix B = that was weird, but thanks for the free sword lmfaoooo. i feel like this is at least going somewhere

annette x gilbert C = gOD okay they’re just gonna come right out and tell us gilbert has been pretending all this time he didn’t know her like WTF that’s so upsetting. “yet i am no father” cool now shut up and accept grace. “APOLOGIZE TO MOTHER” yeah seriously. gilbert, you’re an idiot.

god the sheer amount of supports is just overwhelming. and like. frustrating. just the tIME it takes to get through them. LOL

[beerecordings]

Could I please get some favored puppet au content? 👀 with Chase and Anti, perhaps with them going through a very routine day? (I can send another ask with one of those sentence prompt if that's too vague)

Favored Puppet AU:  Based on the relationships in this post, Anti has certain egos he’s kidnapped and come to favor. Some are his “pets,” some he genuinely sees as friends.  (Chase, One: Anti realizes it might have become attached to the human man it’s been haunting for months now and decides to steal him for its own.)

Trigger warnings for mentions of human sacrifices and monsters eating humans, including children. It’s only briefly mentioned, not a real plot point, but it’s from Anti’s perspective so it’s very straight-forward about it.

Part 1/3.

Sleepy human.

Anti sits beneath his little loft room, listening to Chase breathe.

Hhhhhhh – mmmmm. Hhhhhh. Mmmmmmh. Cough. Hhhhhh.

Breathe through his nose. Peaceful like birds singing.

He makes the whole house smell like human – warmth, oxygen, faint vanilla from the shampoo Anti bought him from the dollar store. Anti doesn’t mind. Anti likes vanilla, and warmth is okay, and when he comes home, the air in the house moves and circles and spins because Chase is there, breathing. Hhhhh – mhhhh. Sleepy, sleepy human.

It makes Anti sleepy too. What time is it? The moon is going back to bed. The sun is coming back. He’s been out all night hunting. Insomnia, Chase calls it. Wouldn’t you rather rest?

The thought of wanting to sleep was not something that had ever occurred to Anti before Chase. What is sleep to a fairy in the human world? Just a chance for your enemies to hurt you.

But Chase’s sleeping makes him tired too, these days. Chase’s sleeping makes him want to rest.

He climbs the ladder up towards the little loft room, where Chase’s bed is tucked against the one wall. His warm body splays out over the blankets. Anti falls onto the mattress besides him without fanfare and Chase mumbles, throwing an arm over him. Anti lies still, staring up at him, at his quiet face. Chase does not wake to the smell of him or the touch of him or the words that he whispers in his broken voice before he lets his eyes slide shut. Chase no longer wakes for Anti’s presence.

These days, they rest together.

--------------------------

“Beep beep beep.”

Chase’s eyes slide irritably open to the sound of Anti mimicking his old alarm clock.

“Beep. Beep beep.”

“Have you decided that’s a comfortable spot?” grumbles Chase, glaring down at the demon resting the weight of most of his body against his ribcage.

“Beep.” Anti glares back at him. “Beep beep beeeeep.”

“Five more minutes.”

Anti sits up and digs his elbows into his lungs.

Chase makes a noise like “hurk!” and squirms to get away, only ending up pinned down to the bed, yelping as Anti digs his sharp little elbow right beneath the ribs.

“Torturer!” shrieks Chase, grabbing him by the shoulders and flipping him onto the bed.

They both know from experience that if Anti wanted to he could lift Chase up by the back of the neck with one hand or pin him down even if he struggled with his whole body against him – they had a long learning curve in terms of Anti trying to figure out how to keep him quiet when he was upset, though they figured it out eventually. But play was also included in the learning process, and Anti, for all that he could tear Chase’s head from his spine with his bare hands, allows himself to be pushed down onto the bed and held by the shoulders, growling up at Chase with dog’s teeth bared in his mouth.

“You’re the worst,” says Chase.

“Beep,” says Anti one more time, and boops his nose. “Eat food time.”

“Are you going to cook for me?”

“No cook! Chay cooks. Sssstupid.”

“What should I make?”

“Make house smell like meat!”

“Bacon it is.”

It’s been thirteen months since the day Anti shoved him into the car and drove him away from his burning apartment building. And Chase, well – he’s adjusted.

He can’t wake up without Anti waking him up, but Anti makes sure to wake him up, so what does it matter? Chase says it’s not healthy, sometimes. Anti hates that. They’ll be in the middle of a good time and then Chase will go quiet all of a sudden and start shaking his head. “This isn’t healthy. Look at me. This isn’t healthy. I know it’s not.”

But luckily, those moments are becoming fewer and fewer.

Anti purrs, lying back on the bed as he watches Chase stretch, listening to the pull of his muscles and the pop of his joints. He’s getting stronger and fatter. Anti is pleased.

“Come on, then,” says Chase, brushing his hand over Anti’s hair as he passes. “Let’s get some food, mister.”

Anti glitches down the stairs and waits for Chase to follow, heading for the kitchen. “Bacon, bacon, bacon,” he chants at him, pronouncing it incorrectly in his glitching, electronic-sounding voice. He gets the bacon out of the meat compartment and tears the bag open with his teeth, letting the last bits of pink pig’s blood stain his teeth before handing it over to Chase. “Cook.”

“What noise does it make?” Chase tests him, taking the bacon and setting the frying pan on the stovetop.

Anti frowns, irritated. S’s are hard for him. He glitches back and forth across the room for a moment, shape-shifting his mouth.

“Sssssszzlll,” he manages finally, his eyes lighting. “Hsssss.”

“Yay,” Chase laughs. “Good job.”

Anti simpers, pleased with himself, leaping up onto the counter and kicking his legs back and forth. Yes, things are good these days. Things are good and getting better all the time. His pet. He made the right choice all those months ago.

The bacon does sizzle, flecks of hot grease leaping out of the pan. Chase stands carefully back as he fries it. Anti comes closer, watching it with a mild sort of contentedness in his eyes. He sticks his hand above the pan and lets the grease jump up onto his skin. Black burns gnaw into the white flesh, revealing veins and bones in his hands, though nothing bleeds. Nothing on Anti ever bleeds.

And Chase just cooks, unperturbed. Anti lifts his hand up to show it to him.

“Gross,” says Chase, smiling.

“No, cool,” says Anti. “Lit.”

Chase laughs so hard he almost drops the frying pan.

“That’s my fault for using lingo around you, dude.”

“Dude,” repeats Anti. “Lit. That’s my fault.”

“Say, ‘I am a grumpy baby.’”

Anti cocks his head at him, squinting his eyes.

“I am a grumpy baby,” repeats Chase, grinning. “Come on, you can do it.”

“Mmmmmh. Grumpy baby,” he growls, leaning forward with his teeth out.

“Hey, hey! What did we talk about? No biting!”

“Play,” protests Anti, mashing their skulls together, looking at Chase’s ear.

“No, no biting even for playing. Humans don’t like getting bit. Most of the time.”

“Grumpy baby,” grumbles Anti, stepping back again and pacing around the kitchen. “Grumpy.”

Chase turns around, leaning back against the counter and smiling at him as he watches him meander around, glitching and transporting. Eventually, Anti glitches back into his space and picks up a piece of bacon.

“Have you had bacon before?” he asks politely.

“No, I ask you that,” laughs Chase. “You know I’ve had bacon before.”

“Have I had bacon before?” Anti corrects himself, tilting his head.

“I don’t know, have you?”

Anti tilts his head again. Right, left. Right, left. Like a curious bird. Chase reaches up and scratches at his beard and Anti melts into his touch, purring.

“Try?” offers Chase.

“Try,” repeats Anti, sticking a piece of bacon in his mouth.

It’s good. Pig flesh and fat.

“Sssszzzl,” he mimicks quietly, putting his head down on Chase’s shoulder, because he owns him and he’s allowed to. His pet. His. “Hissss.”

“Good job,” says Chase softly, scratching the side of his head. “Good job, Anti.”

And it’s not healthy. And it’s not right. And Chase knows.

But he doesn’t care anymore. Or not very much, anyway.

“Sszzl,” he says back to his monster, petting his hair. “His.”

------------------

“Okay, ready?”

“Okay!”

Chase throws the baseball and Anti swings, sending it sailing into the air and off towards the pasture. It startles Brego and they laugh as she kicks her legs and storms off to the other side of the field, making all the chickens start running around in alarm too.

“You have good aim, Anti!” says Chase. “I’m going to throw it high.”

“It hits it high, so,” says Anti, readying his stance again. He strikes the ball almost straight up and laughs when it comes crashing down and slams into his face, darkening a bruise across his cheek, only for the purple and black to disappear again a minute later.

“Now you,” says Anti.

“No! You throw it too hard!”

“Oh, throws it too hard?” He picks a ball up off the ground. Chase shrieks and sprints away, covering his head with his hands as Anti tosses the ball up and down in his hands and races after him. Halfway through he transforms into a dog and ends up tackling Chase to the ground, barking at him and dropping the ball on his chest, pinning him down with his paws.

“Ewww, dog slobber!”

“Slobber!” screeches Anti, bouncing on his paws. That’s a new word! “Slobber, slllllhlhhlob.”

Chase laughs, scratching at his ears. “Slobber!”

“Slobber.”

“There you go!”

“There you go,” replies Anti fondly, covering his face in dog spit even as Chase groans in protest. “There you go.”

Chase giggles and takes his head between his hands. “Pretty puppy,” he says, cajoling him.

“Puppy puppy.”

“Pretty puppy.”

“Party puppy.”

“Party puppy’s pretty good too.”

“Party pastry pupper good good?”

Chase laughs. “Too many p’s all at once?”

“Pp pp pp,” answers Anti politely, transforming back into Chase and letting his hands press into his shoulders. Chase reaches up to touch his short brown horns and smiles in the afternoon light.

Yes. Happy. That’s how Anti likes him. This is how it’s meant to be. They play around until Chase’s heartbeat is racing like strong, healthy human hearts are meant to, and Anti feels pleased with most everything that exists.

Twenty minutes later he is sitting against the door of the bathroom, knees to his chest, listening to Chase cry his eyes out.

----------------------

“Sad?” whispers Anti, knocking their heads gently together. “Why is Chay sad? It’s okay. Hey. It’s okay. Me and you. Me and you.”

“I’m just being stupid,” he sobs. “Just don’t go.”

Anti purrs unhappily at him, patting his back. He wraps Chase up in his blankets and cocoons him against his body, and for a second Chase squirms – Anti has noticed that some ways of moving him make him embarrassed and he’ll say things like “I’m not a baby!” – but then he settles again, weeping into his sleeves and cradled against Anti.

“Something made him sad,” says Anti. “Poor Chay. Sad Chay. I hate that. Don’t be sad. Hey, chill, man, it’s okay.”

“Chill, huh?” Chase chuckles weakly, blinking his red eyes up at his monster. “Say freesh avocadoo.”

Anti cocks his head back and forth, back and forth, growling playfully a little at Chase, knowing he’s being teased.

“Freesh,” he experiments, digging his fingers into Chase’s side. “Freesh? Fish accordion.”

“Good enough,” says Chase, managing a smile.

Anti smiles back at him. Chase works on wiping away his tears, still snuffling.

“Why are you sad?” murmurs Anti, knocking their foreheads together.

“I just have a headache.”

“Oh? I’ll get Tylenol-lenol-lenol. I’ll get Tylenol. There, you said it right. Okay.”

“No, Anti, I don’t want Tylenol,” sighs Chase. “I just need to rest a little and drink some water. I never feel like that helps.”

“No, you’ll take it,” Anti insists, heading down the ladder.

He sees irritation flash on his pet’s face even as he descends. Chase comes down after him all grumpy. Anti can tell it’s grumpiness because his face gets scrunched up and he huffs a little when he breathes, his nose getting thin and then not-thin again, thin and then not-thin.

“I said I didn’t want some. Can’t you just listen to me for once? I’m getting a cup of water.”

Anti pours a Tylenol into his hand and turns around to grab Chase by the hair.

“Hey! Stop it, you know I don’t like getting grabbed!”

“Hey, be good,” Anti insists, tugging him close. He gives Chase a quick slap, not enough to hurt him, and Chase yelps in alarm and hits the floor on his knees. Anti trained him to do that pretty quick. He can also make him lie his whole body back against Anti’s just by grabbing his neck or make him stop fighting with a warning squeeze around both his wrists. He’s not hard to keep in line. It’s nice. He’s a really good human. Anti hooks his hand in his hair and pulls his head back, patting his cheek gently.

“Come on, so, swallow.”

“I don’t want it! Ow, ow, Anti, too tight!”

“No, not too tight,” says Anti, rolling his eyes. “You’re just being baby.”

“No, I’m not! You can’t slap me and drag me, Anti, you’re scaring me! I’m not a baby!”

“Yes! When it actual really hurts, you don’t say ‘ow’, you go quiet and squirm like a little rat boy.”

Chase tries to get up and kick him in the shins, scowling, which makes Anti laugh. He wrestles him onto the couch, curling his free hand warmly through Chase’s hair as he struggles and complains, pushing at Anti’s hands. Anti knows he’s just being whiny. He’s fine. He pushes the medicine between Chase’s teeth and holds his mouth and nose shut until Chase, with a broken little yelp, swallows.

“There,” says Anti politely, patting his head as he sits back. “Not so bad. Good Chay.”

Chase looks at him with watery eyes, his lip beginning to tremble. Anti pouts, squirming himself now. He hates it when he’s crying because of Anti. But he supposes he should have seen it coming. Chase gets all weepy sometimes when Anti does things like lock him somewhere or drag him. Anti doesn’t really get it. How long will it take him to come to terms with the truth that Anti could make him do anything he wanted to? He doesn’t understand.

“Stop, stop, shush, Chay,” he chirrups hopefully, getting onto Chase’s lap to press him back into a hug. “Don’t be crier again.”

Chase curls in on himself, trying to squirm away from Anti. Anti pulls him apart again and manipulates him into a hug – he knows Chase likes them – and he holds him down until finally he stops trying to get away and hugs Anti miserably back, beginning to cry hard.

“Oh, silly,” mumbles Anti, shaking his head against his shoulder. “Nothing to cry about.”

Chase hides his face in Anti’s shirt and weeps, shaking against his body. “Anti,” he cries. “Anti.”

“Just being silly. Just have to listen. Not so bad. He’s so sad today! Puppy doggy mister cry cry. Hey, I’m here. I’m right here. Not going away away.”

Chase makes himself a little ball, which Anti has to admit is kind of cute. He’s like one of those little black bugs that rolls around when you scare it.

Did he scare Chase, pinning him down and force-feeding him?

No. Can’t be. What is there to be scared of? He’s never hurt him since he took him, not on purpose, so they should be good now. Chase is just being weepy because he’s like that. Sometimes humans cry and it’s nobody’s fault. He wraps around Chase’s little roly-poly body and purrs against him, pushing their faces together and rubbing his back like he likes. Chase whimpers and wraps himself close around him, soaking in his comfort. Anti is pleased. He’s good at taking care of his human.

“Why still upset?” says Anti, running his hands through his hair, massaging at his scalp. He likes the way he can feel his skin move over his skull, just a little. “Heard you earlier. Crying in the bathroom too. And yesterday. Crying while you’re feeding chicken chicky chicks.”

Chase quiets down a little, blinking up at Anti, shaking his head weakly.

“No, no liar. Heard you. My ears are better than yours, mister.”

Chase sighs, resting against his thigh, his face red and splotchy with crying. He reaches out absent-mindedly and scratches his weak human nails over Anti’s knee. Anti shifts slightly, surprised. That feels nice.

“Can’t explain it to you,” grumbles Chase, mouth trembling.

“He tries,” Anti commands.

“You don’t even understand my language sometimes, let alone what I’m actually fucking feeling.”

“I learned English for you!” protests Anti with a flash of irritation, pulling on Chase’s hair. “Filthy tongue, bleck! Yucky! Why don’t you learn something respectable to speak, huh? You didn’t even try to learn Irish for Anti.”

“Cause you garble every word you’ve ever spoken and I can barely understand your English as is!” yells Chase, wriggling again. “Stop it, hey, don’t yank on me! Let go! Anti, let go! Now, stop, ow!”

Anti sighs indulgently, shaking his head, and pins him gently down until he stops struggling. That’s always the easiest thing with him. He doesn’t really have a lot of fight in him. He’d be one of those humans who would stay around camp and look after the babies and make food and things in the old days, Anti would put money on it. And that’s okay. It just means that he needs someone on his team who will look after him in the ways he can’t. Anti is the walls around Chase’s camp and the hunters who bring food back to him. Chase is the warmth that waits at home for him. It’s nice. He gets it, now, why humans lived like this. Why some of them still live like this. Together.

“I don’t like it when you make me do things,” cries Chase.

“I know,” purrs Anti, giving him some honest sympathy. “I know. Humans proud.”

“I miss the things you took from me! I want – I want – ”

“What? I’d give you anything, handsome.”

Chase gives a small snort, startled out of his tears. “Anti. We’ve talked about this. Not just any terms of endearment you hear on the TV fit for me.”

“Oh? You’re not handsome?”

Chase laughs a real laugh this time. “Okay, yes, I’m handsome, obviously. Super handsome. Almost unbearably so, let’s be real. But most of the time people don’t call each other handsome as a nickname unless they mean something by it.”

Anti grumbles. He hates human rules and dumb human. It’s Chase’s fault for making him watch rom-coms. How is he supposed to know? “I’d give you anything… kiddo?”

“Still no.”

“Buddy?”

“Haha. I mean, sure. Or you could just call me Chase.”

“Dumbass,” supplies Anti politely, stroking at his beard.

“There you go. That’s the right one.”

“Definitely.”

“Anti, you stole me away from everything I had,” says Chase, letting out a sigh that flutters the hair around Anti’s head. “Do you get that?”

“What did you have?” asks Anti. “Nothing. Mean people and a shitty apartment. Hurting yourself and waiting for me to kill you.”

“No, but Anti – fuck.” Chase turns his head away from him, something bitter in his eyes. “I… it was mine, you know? It was mine. And it was scary when you took me away. And you hurt me for a long time before that, man.”

“It was nothing,” answers Anti, stroking his hair. “You were so unhappy. Yeah?”

Chase sighs again, deep and tired. “Yeah… yeah, that’s true. But I just… I just…”

Anti leans in close over him, sharing body heat. For long minutes, they lie together, quiet.

“What is it you miss?” asks Anti. “Like you said. You miss things Anti took you from.”

Chase closes his eyes, hiding against his thighs.

“He tries,” Anti prompts again, gentler. “He tries.”

“I want my baby,” Chase weeps, a sudden heartbreak in his voice, like the tape on something broken inside his chest has fallen apart again. “I want my baby again, Anti!”

His baby?

Anti lies against him in silence, trying to think as Chase sobs against his legs. His baby wasn’t even there at the apartment. He hadn’t seen his baby in a long time.

“Anti… Anti did not take baby from Chase,” he protests, confused. “It does not bother with little kitten babies.”

Chase is crying too hard to answer. “Hunter,” Anti hears him crying. “I want my son.”

Anti doesn’t like how hard he’s crying. He puts a warm hand around Chase’s throat and purrs loudly at him, trying to make him quiet, but at the same time, he thinks this is one of those things that humans just cry about. When he was young, men would sometimes kill babies on the altars of the gods he served, and he remembers how the woman would come looking for her child every time if she was alive to do so. But there was the blood and nothing he could do about it. That’s how he feels now.

“Baby is dead,” he says softly, rubbing Chase’s shaking chest. “Has been dead long time. Years now? One, two? You told me so.”

It doesn’t make Chase stop. Anti sits back and shakes his head and just holds him. Pressed against his warm body. Listening to his broken breaths.

“I’m sorry, love,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry, Chay.”

Chase holds onto his hands and doesn’t answer, tears running down his face.

----------------------

Naps can be good for humans, or that’s what Chase has told him. Anti has suspected that this was just an excuse for Chase to crash on the couch every day, but today it’s alright.

He lets him sleep.

In the meantime, he cooks, because there are some days Chase says he doesn’t want to, and often when Chase is sad he doesn’t want to do things. Anti knew that even before he took the human out of his apartment kicking and screaming, What he has learned since then is the sort of things that Chase likes to eat. He did not respond particularly well to the Ramen, frozen corndogs, and plain bagels Anti had been bringing him at the start, and when Anti – in one of their first real conversations – demanded to know why he only ever ate that shit at his apartment but didn’t want it now, Chase explained complicated things like “fruit” and “being broke and exhausted and lazy and stupid” and “protein” and such. Anti began bringing him different foods.

Chase likes dried cranberries and kettle-cooked popcorn, ground beef in brown sugar and soy sauce and rice vinegar, Doritos, bananas, dried apple slices, orange juice by the gallon, sweet tea, pasta with parmesan and whipping cream, and oven-bake pizza with meat from at least three different dead animals on top. He likes cakes, too, but will never eat the whole thing alone – he always goes “Anti, have a piece?” and makes him eat at least a couple bites. Says eating cake alone is sad. Anti likes buttercream frosting.

He heats up some soup for Chase, thick potato soup with green onions and bacon from breakfast and a lot of nice yellow cheese, watching it rotate in the hot metal box above the oven until everything is warm and creamy. He puts it in a nice little bowl with a picture of a corgi on it and carves up a couple juicy white peaches, adding a glass of orange juice and some of the cottage cheese Chase eats in lieu of all the dairy he doesn’t like – his hatred of milk and yogurt is passionate.

He carries them over to the couch, touching Chase’s chin.

“Up, up,” he prompts him gently, and his human stirs awake on the couch after a good hour-long nap and looks up at him with big, red eyes. Anti’s always thought his eyes were pretty. Even when they’re all cry-cry red, the irises are sky-sea blue. Anti coos at him and offers him a spoonful of cottage cheese. Chase sticks it mournfully in his mouth and sits up, letting Anti stack his lunch around him on the couch. “Anti want you to eat.”

“I want you to eat,” Chase corrects him unhappily.

“There he is,” says Anti, petting his chin. “All okay, pet.”

Chase sniffles and doesn’t answer, sucking down his orange juice. Anti leaves him to wake up.

He has other things to cook.

“You remember what I told you yesterday?” he calls. “That Anti is having over company-panions. Companions? Company?”

“Oh, shit,” groans Chase. “Are they still coming over? Anti, they scare me.”

“Silly,” laughs Anti. “Just dumb fairies. Not even powerful as Anti. Nobody powerful as it is.”

“He, Anti, not it, you’re not an it.”

“Okay, Chay, I know you don’t like ‘it.’” Anti pulls a couple hearts from their refrigerator – well, he thinks ‘their’ as if he didn’t kill the couple that owned this house and then bring Chase here to replace them – and fries them on their big black pan in Crisco and Chase’s favorite taco seasoning. Taco Bell seasoning, reads the little packet. Live mas.

“I still don’t get what you mean by fairies either,” grumbles Chase. “Growing up nobody told me that fairies look like monsters and like to kidnap or eat people.”

“Because Chay American,” says Anti. “And young. Older days, people know what we are, their grandpa and grandma tell them the stories because they have seen us themselves. But nobody told Chay. He only has his story-tales, like his Happy Potter and Doctor Who Is It.”

At least that makes Chase chuckle, but he sobers up again soon. “Nobody’s going to try to eat me this time, are they, Anti?”

Anti growls, hackles rising just at the thought of it. He flips a heart in oil and watches it splash across the oven top.

Anti himself lost the taste for human a few thousand years ago, and he never wants to regain it even for a mouthful of Chase’s enemies. His god used to eat human sacrifices by the barrel and, when he was told to eat too, it would make Anti sick to the stomach, human blood corrupting his form until he could barely even rise some days, torn nearly in half by the pain. The great snake was never happy to find him retching up what he’d been fed. Real Unseelie should be able to take it. Anti had been small at the time and all he felt was guilt for his failure, shaking with terror when the jaws of the great snake would halfway swallow him in warning. He was glad when Padraig killed it. He hasn’t eaten human since.

Dark thoughts. He shudders, hugging himself for a moment, something he’s seen Chase do, and then he goes back to cooking. It’s deer, anyway. Even humans eat deer. The point is, he knows what his company will like for dinner, so he’s been buying up hearts at the market in the town. He might not eat any himself. He had bacon this morning with Chase.

Chase comes over while he’s cooking, still sniffly and quiet, and he puts his chin on Anti’s shoulder and leans against him. Anti scratches his beard with his free hand. Chase closes his eyes. Anti can’t remember if humans can sleep standing up or not.

“Go do something other than eyes closed,” says Anti, patting his back. “Go, go. Garden, shower, games, clean, horsie.”

Chase mumbles something non-committal, but he obeys. A few minutes later, he is outside in the crisp fall air. All he’s doing is petting his horse, but it’s better than just lying around. Anti knows he’ll feed her and then probably move on to his garden next. He took care of it all summer, even on his sad days. All his plants are offering him heavy harvests now. Humans can turn love into zucchini.

Anti hears himself purring. He finishes the hearts and goes outside, throwing on one of Chase’s big comfy coats and a pair of sunglasses for the smile of the sky, and he sits on the porch and drinks orange juice while Chase tears up weeds from the soft dark earth with his palms and his hoe, just like the farmers Anti has watched from the hills all his life.

-------------------

“Ah, fuck.”

The ground explodes beneath the little gold boy’s feet and Chase’s character goes flying. He grimaces and restarts from his checkpoint, sitting forward in his determination.

Anti plucks at the pages of Ranger’s Apprentice. Chase talks about this series enough that Anti bought it for him, and now he’s trying to figure out the appeal.

“Fucking guardians keep getting me,” mumbles Chase, readjusting his grip on the controller.

He creeps through the field, crouched down low in the grass. His little golden boy wears a mask and ties his hair up like a warrior.

Anti glances over and then to the game. He turns his head down to the book again, casual as can be – and then emits a small, beeping tune.

Chase sits up straight, whirling his character around for a second. Anti goes quiet, not reacting.

“I know I just heard one, holy shit,” says Chase, getting frustrated as Link turns and turns.

Anti makes the tune again. Chase draws Link’s bow, spinning around.

There’s a pause.

Anti snorts out a laugh.

“Hey! Fucker, that was you!”

Anti laughs hard as Chase descends on him, babbling insults and punching at him. “Asshole!”

Anti shakes with amusement, intercepting Chase’s fists and squeezing them in warning, pushing his human back towards the couch. The tune plays again.

“Oh, I’m not falling for that again!”

A guardian blows up the ground at the character’s feet and Link goes flying.

“Goddammit!”

Anti slides off the couch, laughing til he coughs. Chase growls and falls after him, driving his weak, playful humans blows into his arm. Anti headlocks him and drags him into his lap, giggling as Chase growls in mock fury, struggling without heat.

Chase ends up playing his game splayed across Anti’s lap. Eventually he gets past the guardians, slinging Link’s blow around with precision. He’s gotten pretty damn good at the game. Anti watches his little character charge headfirst at his enemies, firing off arrows, and he feels a rush of fondness for him.

“Chase,” he says.

Chase looks up at him, grinning. “Huh?”

“Nothing,” says Anti.

He’s a good pet.

He’s a good… well. He doesn’t really get human words. But he’s good. He’s good.

Anti doesn’t want to see him sad anymore. This is how he should be. This is how he deserves to be. He puts Ranger’s Apprentice down and watches Chase play, and he thinks and thinks until his company arrives.

--------------------

“You’re going to do what it told you to, right? You’re going to stay upstairs like good boy? Or should it tie you down again?”

“Anti, it’s I. What I told you to do. And yes, I am. I’m not interested in meeting anything that even slightly resembles how you were when I first met you.”

Anti laughs. “Anti scary to Chase.”

“You literally tormented me, don’t even joke.”

Anti hums the lullaby he used to scare Chase with. Chase hisses and shoves at him, shaking his head. Anti laughs.

“Okay, okay! Silly puppy. But really. Be good, okay? Stay upstairs.”

“I will.”

“He promises?”

“I promise,” says Chase, touching Anti’s arm for a second.

He’s a touchy-feely little human. Some of the men don’t like to touch each other unless they’re fighting or they have to, but Chase has always liked to touch. He will put his hands on your shoulder or your hand even if he’s only just met you. If he knows you well, he will slouch over you like a blanket or rest against you at random or sometimes just slide his fingers over and graze across your arm or your hip or your back as he passes. Always nice about it, though. Nice, yeah. It is nice.

“But you trust these guys, right, Anti?”

Anti laughs aloud. “Trust them? How stupid I would have to be! If you hear us start to kill each other, just get under the blankets and be quiet. I promise I’ll win, okay?”

He gives Chase a beaming smile.

Chase covers his face and groans into his hands.

[irazor]

hhhhh OR 78

(like a jealous even or smth… idk whatever is inspo to the magic)

Babe! 

Here’s part 3 of the childhood friends au for you. This turned out… even longer, haha, hence the ‘read more’. I hope you’ll like it! ❤️

(part 1 | part 2)

78. “I’m just looking out for you.”

The evening sky is a dark blue, and the late August air chilly as Isak opens the window above his desk.

“What are you doing?”

He turns his head to see Even watching him, standing on the floor with an amused grin on his face.

“Just wait. You’ll like it.”

In fact, he’s not too sure that Even will like this.

But he’s got enough hope that it’ll impress him. So, he reaches for his shirt pocket and, with a smile, he produces the joint he snuck in there when Even said goodbye to his parents in the hallway.

Even raises his eyebrows. “That’s what they taught you at scout camp?”

“Yeah.” He leans back against the window frame. “Among other things.”

Even gives him a lop-sided smile, before he climbs the desk and leans back against the other side of the window.

The dark shades under his eyes are even more pronounced now in the dusk, as are the hollows beneath his cheek bones.

Earlier on, when it’s been more than a month between their family dinners, it’s always been because of Isak’s mum. 

This time, however, it’s been over two months since the last one, and she’s been more stable than in a long time.

It could, of course, be due to the summer holidays. To the fact that he was to scout camp for ten days, and that Even was on some exchange program thing in England for three weeks.

But he can’t shake the feeling that, this time, the hiatus has something to do with Even.

Not that he hasn’t heard from him – they’ve been texting on and off, but they haven’t talked. And sometimes there’s been a delay of several hours, even a day, before Even has replied.

Usually, the month-long breaks between dinners have at least included a few nights of hanging out, just the two of them.

But this time he didn’t see Even at all. Two long, dry months, and he hasn’t even been able to decide if it’s been for the better, or worse.

At first sight of him in the hallway earlier, though, he knew. He’s missed him so much, so fucking much – he’s just been really good at imagining that he hasn’t.

And maybe he imagines the shade flashing across Even’s face as he holds out the joint towards him, or he doesn’t.

“Don’t you want some?” He raises an eyebrow at Even. “It’s good stuff.”

“Is it?” Even eyes the joint, then him. “Where did you get it, by the way?”

He shrugs. “Jonas has this new guy in his German class who fixes us up.”

“Did you try it?” Even bites his lip, a serious look on his face.

Isak rolls his eyes. “Don’t worry. I’ve been smoking before, it’s no big deal.”

“I’m just looking out for you.” Even gives him an undecipherable look. And then, at last, he reaches out for the joint and lifts it to his mouth.

God. The way Even looks when he smokes.

His full lips closing around the white paper, his blue eyes almost grey in the evening light. The red glow from the tip when he takes a drag a stark contrast to his pale face.

The tips of Isak’s fingers already tingle as he accepts the joint back. “It’s good shit, right?”

“Yeah.” Even looks out the window, gaze fastened somewhere in the distance. “Hope they don’t come to check on us. Your parents, I mean.”

“They’ve never done that before.” Isak takes another drag, the weed crackling in the silence. “Why now?”

Even shrugs. “Nah. You’re probably right.”

He looks at Even again, and wonders if he’s noticed how casually Isak knocks the ashes off the stub, or that he hasn’t coughed even once. If he’s seen that Isak has grown a whole five centimeters during the course of this summer.

They pass the joint back and forth in silence, until it’s finished, Isak’s limbs glued to the desk, his head swimming.

“Holy shit,” Even says as he unfolds his long legs from the desk and slides down onto the floor. “This is intense.”

Isak can barely will his mouth to cooperate enough to answer, and the room spins as he leans forward to close the window, one hand on the frame to steady himself. “Uhh. Yeah.”

For a moment, he thinks he’ll slip, but then he manages to catch the window and close it. When he turns around, he sees Even sitting on the floor, leaning against the side of the bed, eyes closed.

His legs are wobbly as he climbs down from the desk and sits down beside him. “Hey. You – you okay?”

Even nods, but keeps his eyes closed. “Yeah. Whoa. I’m just – can we just sit here?”

“Yeah.”

It’s not like he’ll tell Even, but he hasn’t smoked that many times before – and never this much, this fast.

So much for trying to impress him.

He closes his eyes as well, but everything around him spins faster and faster as he does, so he pries them open again, trying to focus on something outside of himself to keep from feeling sick.

And first thing he sees is, of course, Even.

His arms are thin, and the skin on them is pale, despite the long, warm summer. A few stray hairs stand in the wrong direction, a path of brown freckles lining the sleeve of his t-shirt. His collarbone is visible through the thin fabric, and a thought flashes by – there’s something he should ask Even, something he’s been wondering –

It flits away just as fast, and he’s back to watching Even. His full lips, slightly parted, his eyelashes resting on the top of his cheeks, the soft strands of hair falling over his forehead.

He’s never wanted anything more than he wants to kiss him right now.

His fingers are itching, and the skin on his whole body tingles, like there’s something alive underneath the surface. But his limbs feel like they’re made of lead, heavy against the floor, unable to move.

Suddenly, Even blinks, opens his eyes, and looks straight at him. And time stops.

It’s probably due to the weed, but in this moment, it feels like the only things to exist are him, Even, and the sound of their breaths in the silent room.

Neither of them say anything, or move. His whole body still molten into the floor, his head glued to the side of the mattress. His hand on the floor between them, still and unmoving.

The blue of Even’s eyes is pale, his pupils dark and wide, and Isak both sees and hears the apple of his throat move as he swallows.

He has no idea for how long they sit there, suspended in time, breathing, staring at each other, the air between them thick and non-existent all at once.

Until a sharp knock on the door tears the moment apart.

“Isak?” His mother’s voice sounds distorted, like it’s filtered through water instead of a thin wooden door. “Even?”

He clears his throat. The movement feels disconnected from himself, like it’s someone else’s body doing it, before he hears his own voice, hoarse and thick. “We’re – we’re sleeping.”

“Almost,” Even adds, his voice gravelly.

There’s a moment’s silence on the other side of the door, before his mother says “Alright. Goodnight then, boys.”

“Goodnight.” He lifts his hands and turns them over, to see if they still feel like his own.

The high is already starting to wear off, and in a not too pleasant way, the tingling on his skin more and more uncomfortable. “Maybe we should go to bed.”

Even nods, slowly. “Yeah.”

They brush their teeth in silence, Isak sitting on the toilet seat, Even leaning over the sink, one hand on the cabinet beside him.

The prickling feeling in his limbs hasn’t subsided as he lies in bed a few minutes later.

It’s like he doesn’t fit into his skin, like he’s too big and too small for it all at once. Like he should get out, go somewhere else, but has no idea where.

He tries to lie still and not wake Even by scraping his feet against the bedsheets, but it’s more and more difficult with each passing second.

Just as he’s about to turn and get out of bed, Even’s voice comes up from the mattress on the floor, and it sounds smaller than he’s ever heard it.

“Can I sleep in your bed? I don’t – I don’t feel so well.”

To be honest, he’s not sure how do handle the thought of Even in his bed right now.

But, on the other hand, lying here alone is an even worse option.

“Okay.” He scoots a little closer to the wall to make room for Even, and bites the inside of his cheek.

As the mattress dips behind him, he tries not to tense up, but he’s not sure how well he manages.

His whole body feels like a live wire, alight with anxiety from the weed, and from the knowledge that Even lies only inches behind him.

And then Even’s chest is against his back, Even’s arm is around his waist, his hand on his shoulder, and he wants to cry with relief.

It’s like his touch draws all the discomfort out of him, makes it seep out and dissolve, leaving only warmth and contentedness behind.

His throat constricts, and the inside of eyes prickle. If this isn’t supposed to be his, why does it feel so fucking right?

He tries to breathe steady, tries to keep control over his body and not lean too much into the touch, and then Even exhales, his breath warm on his neck.

“I – I felt really weird there for a while.” His voice is low, cracked, still small.

He swallows. “Me too.”

“Thanks for… for letting me sleep up here,” Even says next. “I – it feels a lot better now when I’m with you.”

It takes all of his efforts to not turn around in that moment.

If he would, he’d never be able to hold back from kissing Even, to let every inch of their body touch.

And what if Even would reciprocate, hold him and kiss him back, and then regret it when he’s sober?

Having Even like that and then lose him would be worse than never having him at all.

So he lies still, stares into the wall, and settles for the weight of Even’s arm across his chest.

It’s not until Even’s breaths have evened out and become heavier, that he dares to stroke his thumb over his wrist, the pulse beneath the thin skin slow but steady.

–––––

It’s still dark when he wakes up.

At first, he doesn’t realize that he’s awake. Only feels this encompassing, intense feeling of contentment, of fullness and belonging, and he recognizes it from somewhere – a dream? a memory?

Until he suddenly becomes aware of where he is.

Lying with his face in the crook of Even’s neck, his nose and lips touching the thin skin over his pulse point, with his arm slung around Even’s back, Even’s arm around him, their legs intertwined.

Just like the last time.

Horrified, he snaps his head up, and opens his eyes.

Only to find that Even – unlike the last time – is wide awake, and is looking straight at him.

His eyes are pale in the dark, his breathing steady, and he blinks, once, twice, but he doesn’t take his eyes off Isak. Just watches him with a sincere, serious look on his face.

“Why – why aren’t you sleeping?” His own voice sounds hoarse, cracked.

Even bites his lip, then releases it. “I… don’t know.”

His stare is unwavering, and Isak doesn’t know how to look away. “How… how long have you been awake for?”

“I don’t know. Does it matter?” Even’s voice is low, almost a whisper.

And then he lifts his hand from Isak’s back and puts a stray lock of hair behind his ear.

The look in his eyes is so fond as he does it that Isak is sure his heart will stop.

He doesn’t know what to do with himself. Doesn’t know where to put his hands, doesn’t know how to breathe.

Even’s arms are warm and heavy around him, and maybe he should move away. But he can’t. He can’t move a limb, not a single finger.

Only watch Even as he watches him, his thumb brushing over Isak’s cheek, his face suddenly closer, mere inches from his own.

Isak holds his breath. Waits. Holds it.

And then, just like that, he doesn’t have it in him to wait anymore.

He grabs hold of Even’s t-shirt at the back of his neck, draws a breath, and kisses him.

It’s just a touch of lips at first, before he pulls back, breath short, throat tight with what he’s done. Even’s are lips parted, and his eyes wide and full of wonder.

And before he has time to turn around and bury his face in the pillow, Even slides his hand around his neck, and kisses him back.

How many times has he imagined this, awake or in his dreams?

He has no idea.

All he knows is that he never thought it would feel like this.

As Even presses their lips together, opens his mouth and tilts his head to the side, he can feel goosebumps rise all over his skin. His mouth is so warm, and it sends tingles all the way down his spine as their tongues touch – only a brush, but it feels so much. 

And nothing could prepare him for the smallest, most important details: how Even’s breath warms his upper lip when his nose is aligned with Isak’s own. How his eyelashes tickle against his cheek. Or how his breath stutters as Isak dares move his hand down to his upper back, and press him closer.

They kiss and kiss and kiss until he loses track of time, without any idea how long they’ve been lying here. His chest feels tight and endlessly full at the same time – if he could, he’d crawl inside Even, let himself be surrounded by him and stay there.

To be honest, he’s a bit afraid of what will happen when they stop. What Even will say. What will become of them.

Right now, he’s not sure he wants to know. 

So, he keeps kissing him, again and again, ignoring the way his lips tingle and that his mouth starts to feel dry.

At last, Even draws back and lays his head down on the pillow. His eyes are wide, and he licks his lips, swollen and red. It’s silent for a beat as they watch each other, and Isak holds his breath, waiting.

Until finally, Even lifts his hand to Isak’s face, cards his fingers through the hair at his temple, and speaks.

“Do you – do you remember that day when I waited for you? At school?”

He feels weightless, short of breath. “Yeah.”

“Do you remember what I said? On the sidewalk?” Even’s palm is warm and big against his cheek, unmoving.

“You – you said that you didn’t know if you were into guys. Instead of girls.”

“No, I didn’t.” Even moves even closer, their foreheads touching.

“Yes. You did.”

“No.” Even smiles, and traces his eyebrow with his thumb. “I said a guy.”

He rolls his eyes. “Okay, then. But I – I didn’t know what you meant, if you meant like, someone specific, like someone in your class, or guys in general –”

“God, Isak.” Even’s eyes almost disappear as he smiles even bigger, and shakes his head. “You’re so fucking thick sometimes.”

But the way he says it makes Isak’s insides fill with warmth.

“I’ve missed you so fucking much this summer.” He lets his own hand come to rest around the back of Even’s head.

Suddenly, Even’s face is serious again, his eyes blank. “Me too.”

“Where were you?” He moves his hand down to Even’s neck, fingers carding through the hair behind his ear.

“I – can we talk about it later? I really wanna tell you… everything.” Even bites his lip, before he looks down at Isak’s mouth, and then into his eyes again. “But – right now, can we just… kiss again? Please?

Even’s pulse beats quickly underneath his palm, alive, steady.

They do need to talk, of course. About a lot of things. What this means. Their parents, the future. Everything.

Right now, though, there’s only them, here in his bed, under the duvet.

So he nods, and holds on to Even’s neck, before he leans in, and kisses him again.

[littledoggy-girlcollar]

A Hot Fucking Take

Kara has kept in touch with... whatever that ship Mon-El and Winn are on is called. Because, duh, the dude she liked once upon a time and also her best friend is on there, and also Brainy wanted to keep in touch with them in case anything happens.

Winn figures out a way to do on-command contact, like phone calls. Kara and Mon-El (because they have that connection of having had their planet blow up) end up calling each other all the time to just rant about stupid shit, whether it’s about saving people or just bullshit they’ve had to deal with that day.

Eventually Kara starts confiding in Mon-El about her friendship with Lena. The first time it happens he’s like “uh-huh” and lets her go on. The second, third, and fourth times she does this he does the same thing. The fifth time Kara’s like “Mon-El... I think I might have a crush on her” and he just SCREAMS really loudly so someone comes to check on him (Winn, Imra, whoever) and he’s like “no I’m fine” and as soon as their gone he turns back to the camera (think of it like FaceTime) and whispers “jesus christ fucking finally you goddamn idiot how long did it take you to figure out for God’s sake I was ready to come back to Earth just to smack you over the head” and Kara’s just like ��hhhhh.”

So a portion of their calls becomes dedicated to Kara yelling about Lena for five minutes to three hours. Mon-El starts bringing popcorn (Winn managed to genetically engineer the kernels. He also occasionally sits in and steals some from Mon-El’s bowl even though he has his own. Kara smirks every time that happens).

When Winn’s not there Mon-El tells Kara about his own love troubles.

One day Kara calls very excitedly and starts rambling and blushing and zooming around the room. Alex is in the background with some wine and her own popcorn just sitting on the couch watching her. When Kara finally calms down enough to speak in coherent sentences (at least half an hour later) all she manages to say is “LENAKISSEDME” before flying out the window and screaming. Alex starts laughing, Winn shrieks and falls out of his chair, flailing and laughing, and Mon-El just sits in stunned silence for a second. When Kara comes back he yells “son of a BITCH WINN-” because he made a bet about who would make the first move and now he’s on decontamination and toilet duty for two weeks.

After they’re all done freaking out Winn goes to grab whatever the ship’s equivalent of red wine is and listen to Kara gush about it for another hour before she has to do stop some dickhead from blowing up a tower. As soon as the call ends Winn turns to Mon-El and goes “so how and when do we tell them” and Mon-El says “in person. So like in a month. Our time reactor is malfunctioning and I don’t want to attempt a space AND time jump at the same time so we need to...” and Winn sighs and listens to him ramble.

A month later Kara and Lena have talked about their feelings and have started dating (the most unbelievable part of this whole thing I know). They’re going to Kara’s apartment for Game Night but the door is already open. They go in Mon-El is sitting on the counter and when he sees Kara he just goes “BITCH!” and Kara goes “BITCH!” and tackles him off the counter. Somewhere in the apartment Winn pops his head out of a room to watch them wrestle. When they finally stop, Kara has him in a choke-hold. Lena is standing in the doorway feeling Confused. She looks at Mon-El and is like “you called yourself Mike right” and he wheezes (from the chokehold) “yeah” and then because Lena is slightly Jealous she goes “didn’t you two used to date” and Mon-El.

Mon-El snorts, twists to face Kara, and between fits of laughter manages to yell out, “HEY KARA REMEMBER WHEN WE THOUGHT WE WERE STRAIGHT?!” and Kara and Winn start laughing with him because guess what? The fanfic writers were right once again, Winn was in love with Mon-El, and then Winn walks up and kisses him and Kara says “MON-EL HOW COULD YOU KEEP THIS FROM ME?!” because not once in the past month had Mon-El mentioned that he had finally made a move. Then Winn says “actually I did” and Kara says “SON OF A BITCH, now I owe Alex a month paperwork duty!”

Then they all have Game Night and it’s a fuckkng Gay Time.

[kusunogatari]

[ ObiRyū October | Day Fifteen: The Other Children ] [ @abyssaldespair ] [ Uchiha Obito, Suigin Ryū, Suigin Reiji ] [ Verse: White Hands of Healing ] [ Previous || Next ]

There’s a noticeable tension in the house this morning. Lying awake in bed long before he needs to be, Reiji stares up at the ceiling, brows wilted and greys flickering as he thinks. He’s never been so nervous in his entire life.

Granted, his life has only lasted about six years so far, but...well, up until this point, nothing has ever had him quite so rattled. It’s this morning that Reiji is to attend his first day of school at the Academy.

At first, it wasn’t even a certainty that he would go. While a bit of a mixture of his parents in appearance, he took an early shine to his mother’s side of things when it came to chakra. Given his age of course, neither Ryū nor Obito had yet to give him any real training in either of their fields. Both, admittedly, had assumed he would follow their path. But as his introductory year loomed closer, they finally sat and had a talk about it.

“What do you think, Reiji?” Ryū had asked, giving her son a smile. “You can do whatever you want to do. You can learn to be a medic, or a shinobi...or anything else! Would you want to go to the Academy?”

Reiji, only five at the time, had glanced between them nervously. While neither of them gave any sign of bias, just looking to him curiously, he still felt a pinch in his gut. If he chose one...would the other be disappointed?

“Can...can I still learn to heal if I go?”

“Of course you can! But we don’t want you to put too much on your plate at once,” Obito advised. “You might wear out.”

“But...I can…?”

“If that’s what you want,” Ryū confirmed with a smile. “We just want you to be happy.”

He’d agonized over it for days, weighing his options. Even at that age, Reiji knew of the scarcity of his bloodlines. There were only two other Uchiha besides his father...that being his uncle Sasuke and his child. And his mother was the very last of her clan, though they had always been rare. If he only learned to be like one...then the other might be lost forever…!

In truth, he wasn’t sure if he was suited to be a shinobi. Like his mother, he was a bit meek, shying from the idea of hurting someone. But...Obito had told of how shinobi weren’t just fighters. They were protectors. And Reiji certainly wanted to protect his family.

So, after nearly a week of thinking, he decided he would go.

Now that the day is here, however...he’s been doing nothing but thinking over his decision again. What if he’s making a mistake?

“Reiji…?”

Broken from his thoughts, he looks to his door, seeing his mother peering through. “Kāchan…?”

“I had a feeling you might be awake.” Stepping into the room, Ryū crosses until she can perch on the edge of his bed. “...nervous?”

He gives a shy nod.

“It’s okay to be nervous. This is something brand new, that you’ve never experienced before. But I promise everything will be just fine. You’ll get to make some new friends, learn new things...it’s going to be great!”

“Really…?”

“Really. And you know your father and I will do all we can to help you.”

That takes a slight edge off of Reiji’s nerves. “...what if I mess up?”

“Messing up is part of life, dear. Everyone makes mistakes, even the best of us. Did you know your father missed the entrance ceremony when he was your age?”

“W-what?!”

Ryū nods, unable to help a smile. “But he still made it into class just fine. And he graduated, and became a shinobi despite making mistakes. He didn’t become a chūnin his first try, either. And...well…” Something falters in her expression, Reiji tilting his head in curiosity. “...your father, as we’ve told you, followed a bad path for a while. But in the end, he chose to make things right. So, as long as you keep trying, and do your best...things will turn out all right in the end. I’m sure of it.”

“So...if I don’t become a shinobi, or...or a medic...will you and tōchan be...angry?”

Ryū’s eyes widen in shock. “Of course not! Reiji, the only thing that matters to us is that you live a happy and healthy life. Maybe you wouldn’t like being a medic, or a shinobi. But that’s just how things are. Everyone is different. You just give it a try, and see how you feel. If you don’t think it’s the right path for you, well...we’ll keep looking until we find it. Okay?”

“...o-okay…”

“Now...it’s about time to get up, so you get dressed, and I’ll go start breakfast. Your father is already up, too.”

“Will you…both come with me?”

“Of course we will.” Gently ruffling his hair, Ryū gives Reiji a smile. “Everything’s going to be fine. No matter what happens, your father and I will always support and protect you.”

A few more of his doubts settled, Reiji nods and rises as his mother takes her leave. A light jacket is pulled on over his shirt and trousers, making his way into the belly of the house.

Obito, seated at the table, immediately notices his son’s entrance. “There he is! Are you excited?”

“I guess so…”

“Ah, don’t worry. It’s okay to be nervous. All the other kids will be, too - it’s the first day for everybody!”

Moving to sit, that gets Reiji to pause. “...yeah…” He hadn’t considered that.

Ryū then brings over their plates, and the little family has their breakfast together.

“Will we have a test the first day?”

“I don’t think your sensei will be that evil,” Obito laughs. “It will probably be mostly getting to know everybody, and asking what you know. You won’t start any real work until tomorrow. And your first year will be easy!”

“And I’m sure you’ll make lots of friends,” Ryū adds with a smile.

“What if nobody likes me…?”

“Impossible,” Obito counters. “You’re too nice not to make friends.”

“Just be yourself, and people will make up their own minds. You’re a very sweet boy, Reiji. You won’t have any trouble, I’m sure.”

Once the meal is done and dishes cleaned up, Reiji’s parents help him pack up his bag and start the trek to the Academy. Ryū takes one hand while Obito takes the other, the three of them leaving the house behind. All the while, butterflies continue to hatch out in Reiji’s stomach. Like his father told him, he tries to remember that everyone else will be nervous, too.

The yard outside the building is filled with both old and new students and their parents, many standing in groups and chatting as they await the sensei for each class. Reiji doesn’t really recognize anyone...he hasn’t had much chance to meet anyone his age yet. Any kids in their neighborhood are a few years older than him.

And it doesn’t take long to notice something...odd.

Though no one directly stares at them, there’s a strange sort of...separation between his family, and everyone else. None of the other children make to approach, or any of the adults, either. Glancing up to his parents, Reiji tries to understand. Ryū’s expression is neutral, eyes scanning the yard. Obito, on the other hand...looks a little tense.

“...tōchan…?”

His father glances down, and then manages a flicker of a smile.

“First year students, this way please!”

Hearing the call, Reiji tenses. But at the same moment, he feels tightening grips on both his hands.

“You’ll be just fine,” Ryū assures him.

“And we’ll be here to pick you up once your classes are done.” Obito takes a knee. “...just remember, no matter what anyone else says...you’re a good boy, Reiji. And we love you.”

Though meant to be reassuring, his father’s words only bring a small spark of worry to his gut. But there’s no time to discuss it as the other first years gather around their new sensei. Slowly slipping from his parents’ grip, Reiji gives them a nod, jaw clenched and chin trembling.

Obito slips an arm around Ryū, the pair of them watching as the children are led into the Academy.

“...do you think this was the right choice? What if someone -?”

“It’s going to happen sooner or later,” Obito murmurs. “We’ve tried to be open at the proper pace. I think he’ll be fine. He knows enough to make that call for himself.”

Brow wilted, Ryū leans against him with a sigh. “...I hope so. I just don’t want someone giving him trouble on our account.”

“You mean my account.”

“You know what I mean.”

“We can’t hide the past from him forever.”

“And I don’t want to! I just...want to tell him when the time’s right. Having him here, around the other children...it might be out of our hands.”

“If he has questions, we’ll answer them. We knew this would happen eventually. Someday, he has to know what I did. And then...he can make up his own mind.”

Ryū glances to her husband, seeing the conflicting emotions in his eyes. “...you’re right. He loves you. You’re his father, and you’ve changed. I’m sure he’ll understand. Just like I did.”

“...I hope so.”

     Hhhhh, I'm...not sure I like this one OTL For some reason I just could NOT get into this one. I left and came back several times, and just...phhht. Maybe I'll revisit it later, since I wanted to add a scene IN the classroom, I just...don't feel it today, I guess. Admittedly I've got some burnout going on between irl stuff, and two daily challenges for the month. But I WANNA do these, so...darn it, I'ma do them. Today's just a blegh day.      But yes, for now that's all for this one. I'll try and come back to it another time and give it a bit more substance. Thanks for reading~

[cringeytumblorg]

Day 13: Sunset.

Ship: Tsutsu (Tsuburaba x Tsuyu)

He never thought he would ever get to see the sunset with her, nor even get to be with her at all. But there he was, after so many months of trying to get close to her.

At first he thought it was just a temporary crush. That it wasn't anything more than that, and it was all just because of the very weird and awkward situation he had been put in.

But he quickly realized it wasn't just as simple as that. It was complicated, very complicated. And two months later, he had finally accepted that the girl wouldn't get out of his mind, even if he didn't really see her much and they never even interacted.

Love felt warm most of the time, but at the same time cold. Very cold, and it hurt him whenever he saw her with someone else. With someone she was close with, and who had more opportunities of being with her.

Specially when he saw her spending so much time with her best friend Kirishima, who clearly had a very nice relationship with her... That made him very sad.

There was also the thing about their classes being rivals, and how Monoma would murder him if he found out that he had fallen for a girl from that "terrible" class.

He still hated her class, but he couldn't hate her. And he had tried fighting those feelings for some days, denying them. But he couldn't lie to himself anymore. And after finding himself desperately trying to at least be able to see her from a distance at lunch time or after classes, and thinking about her all day... He gave up.

He also was scared that it would just be a perverted thing, since the whole tongue being wrapped around his whole body and mouth... Even if it was necessary to stop him from using his quirk, it would probably be taken by the others as just pervyness.

But this definitely wasn't pervyness. It had been his first kiss. A very weird one... But it still counted. And she probably hadn't even thought about it, but to him it meant a lot. He also was curious about it... Was it her first "kiss" too? Was he the first person being victim of her unconscious kiss? He really wished so.

It took him almost five entire months. It took him two months to finally and thanks to some of his friends, get some excuse to talk to her. She was so friendly and adorable, but he still got very nervous around her every single time they talked.

They started to talk more often, but not much. He was too afraid of asking her for her cellphone number, and he thought it would be inappropriate and awkward.

It took him four months to finally ask her to go out with him. Not really go out with him, but go out with some of their friends AND him. He had told some of his friends to go with him to the mall, and tried his best to ask Tsuyu in a cool way to go with them, since they were already considered friends.

He also said it would be fun if she asked some of her friends to go too, not wanting that to happen at all but trying to hide the fact that it definitely was because he only wanted to see her.

She took Kirishima, Mina, Ochaco and Midoriya with her to go to the mall with them... Who were the "only" ones free.

And it took him almost five months. Five months for him to finally be able to for the first time, ask her to go out with him. Alone.

He still tried to hide the fact that he liked her, and only asked her to go with him as "friends". So it wasn't really a date, but he was proud of himself for finally getting to spend time with her alone.

For it to not sound like he had planned anything and like it was just a random idea he had, he waited for her at the door of her class.

When she got out, he lied saying that he had invited some friends to go to a lake near there that he really wanted to go to to see the sunset, but they had all said no. And that he had asked her to go with him because they were friends and he really wanted to go with someone.

She accepted right away, and so he asked her to wait for him so that he could get something he had forgotten about. He ran to his locker and got a black bag out of it, which Tsuyu was curious about but didn't mind enough to ask.

It was a frog plushie. He had bought it for her a long time ago, but never had the excuse to give it to her. He had actually bought two of them, one to keep himself and one to give to her. If things went right, he would finally give it to her that afternoon.

They were sitting near the lake, watching the sunset. There was a perfect view of it, and it was very beautiful. Like her.

He blushed at his thoughts, thinking about how lucky he was to be with her in that moment. Even if she didn't even know what his true intentions and feelings for her were. Even if she probably didn't like him back, and never would.

-"Tsuburaba-chan, I am glad you asked me to come"- the boy loved her voice, and hearing her say his name. And adding the "-chan" at the end of it. He loved it when his eyes met hers, and when her words were only directed to him. He loved being next to her, spending time with the one girl he wanted to be all the time with. She smiled at him and let out a croak.

-"I-I am glad you accepted to come with me, T-Tsuyu-chan"- He felt very dumb whenever he got nervous. He almost only stuttered when talking to her, and he hated that. He really hoped that she didn't already know he liked her.

-"I am surprised it took you so long, ribbit"- The poor boy sitting next to her was very confused and scared. He perfectly knew that she was very blunt, and he was scared of what she would say next. He saw her cheeks getting red, which made his get read too. And which caused him to immediately turn his face to the sun, which was slowly hiding... Like he would anytime soon if she kept making him nervous.

-"W-what do you mean, Tsuyu-chan?"- He tried his best to avoid stuttering this time, but he still couldn't. He gulped. The girl turned to look at the sun too, and took a moment to reply.

-"I know that Tsuburaba-chan likes me, ribbit"- his heart starting beating faster than ever. He wanted to run away and disappear forever. He loved her, but he hated that she was so blunt sometimes.

-"H-How do you k-know that, T-Tsuyu-chan?"- they both turned to look at each other. The two teenagers with the round and big eyes managed to make them even bigger, very surprised.

-"I didn't. It were just speculations, but you just confirmed it"- At least she hadn't reacted in a bad way, which meant that at least he hadn't to carry with that weight on his shoulders. And that they would still be friends at least.

-"T-that's very evil of you, Tsuyu-chan"- they both chuckled, his comment successfully clearing the air from awkwardness. And then she smiled at him and petted his head, which he didn't expect at all.

-"I like Tsuburaba-chan too, ribbit"- she said as her face turned a bit redder, and she did her classic finger-to-cheek thing and tilted her head. She looked so adorable.

-"W-what!? Since when!? Tsuyu-chan, don't play with me!"- he said poking her free cheek, frowning a little. He didn't like this teasing.

The girl giggled and sweetly kissed his cheek, which made the boy's heart completely melt, and he gasped.

-"I am not joking, ribbit"-

@bnha-rarepair-month

Notes:

•My English really sucks, sorry.

•I don't know anything about Kosei and I think I made Tsuyu too ooc too, so I am very sorry about that-

•It's 3 am and I have many more prompts to do hhhhh- I decided to write today because sometimes it's easier than drawing-

[decepti-thots]

So first off: thank you so much to everyone who has filled this in! It's still gonna stay open for a little while longer, but this seems as good a number as any to start collecting the info on:

nudges you. geddit. geddit. hehehe.

Now! I am very glad indeed that I ran this, because the results were a little different than I was expecting, tbh! Let's break this down:

As expected, a not-insignificant chunk of people selected basically all the options for 'interested in'.

Less expected: there's a roughly equal split between people who are exclusively interested in doing a fic rec 'week' and people excluively interested in doing a monthly fic rec thing on a specific day. Neither group is insignificant.

There's a bit of a bias overall towards the weekly option having suggested/optional themes, and the monthly option being a free-for-all.

The thing is, neither group has a large enough lead over the other that it wouldn't be omitting a huge chunk of the folks who expressed interest. So right now, while I'm not 100% committing to this, I'm thinking the best approach might be: kick things off with a big weeklong event with suggested themes for each day (probably five), and then after that, given the interest, pick a day of the month to run a regular free-for-all fic rec thing on. That way, if a whole week seems intimidating, you can still join in after when we start up the monthly thing, and if you just want to do a focused event and then forget about it, you can do the weeklong event that kicks it off.

Some other stuff:

Everyone said they want it on Tumblr, to noone's surprise. A few folks then also said they were interested in Twitter and Dreamwidth. TBH, given uhh… recent developments… and the likely exodus of a lot of fandom activity from Twitter in the coming months, I'm not really gonna commit to doing anything on Twitter at the moment! hhhhh we will. see. Dreamwidth got a surprising number of replies- a small overall percentage, but enough that if folks are interested, I will happily dust off my old DW and make a comm or something to post to. I'll happily moderate a DW comm, that doesn't seem too big an ask as DW runs pretty slow-and-steady these days.

I have addressed why there won't be a Discord here.

Multiple people wrote in saying it would be cool to have something on AO3 directly. I'm gonna be honest, I'll need to have a think about whether there's any tools on AO3 that would facilitate something. Its fic rec tools are, shall we say, rather underdeveloped. But I'll think about it. There might be something!

Almost everyone wanted an event account to exist, so that'll be a thing. I'm gonna have to think about how to handle NSFW recs etc, as I really want this to be accessible to everyone as much as possible. I'll turn it over in my head a bit. Probably content guidelines for the rec itself plus requirements for blacklist tagging would be a good place to start?

I'm really pleased that folks were overwhelmingly interested in the comment fest idea! There was more of a split on when to do it though: about 2/3rds wanted it during a rec event, and 1/3rd at a different time. So I'm leaning towards combining the two for the week itself, but I'll think about it, because I would love to really encourage as much participation in that as possible.

I'll leave this accepting responses for now, but next I'll be thinking about when it might be best to run the weekly event (probably sometime in January, but I'll run a poll regarding best dates etc for folks later this month I expect) and possible (optional) themes for the weekly event.

Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to respond and/or signal boost, and if anyone has any direct questions etc do feel free to drop me an ask if you like! :)

[INTEREST CHECK] - Transformers fic rec fandom event!

Hi everyone!

I've put together an interest check for something I've been thinking about for a while: some kind of event in Transformers fandom to encourage people to post fic recs (and possibly comments alongside it)!

In fandoms I was in back in ye olde LiveJournal times especially, I always really liked fic rec weeks and monthly fic rec days/events, because they encouraged people to get in the habit of sharing stuff they had found and liked, so I've considered potentially running a TF one for a while now.

I wanted to get an idea of what kind of format people would be most interested in, so I made an interest check:

Please consider checking it out and sharing it!

I will also be posting it over on Twitter.

Thanks, folks!

[nyarados]

hhhhh so my longtime/childhood best friend and I started dating like last year and then she had to move like four months later across the country bc her parents got divorced. so we broke up because we thought it’d be too hard to have a long distance relationship and that’s both put a strain on our mental health and stuff but...

now it’s been like five months since she moved and we still talk everyday and yesterday we FaceTimed for like ten hours and the entire time all that I could think about was how much I still loVE HER! LIKE SHE’S THE MOST CARING PERSON I KNOW AND SHE’S SMART AND BEAUTIFUL AND WE COMMUNICATE SO WELL?? gahhhh i just miss her a lot D

oh my godddd I’m like crying this is so soft but sad I really hope you get to see her soon?? long distance probably isn’t that bad I don’t think and you guys are talking everyday anyway. if your hearts are still tied then no amount of distance between you can tear you apart

[beware-of-you-98]

get to know me

tagged by: @sc-rp

How old are you?

20

Surgeries?

none

Tattoos?

so i met tonight alive again back at warped tour and jenna was having a small little meet at the dickies tent and i asked her to write out world away for me bc the song means so much to me and i got the tattoo a few months later (a few days after i was officially five years clean from self harm) (first pic is a few days after i got it; it was still healing/second pic i just took a few minutes ago)

idk when i’m gonna get this but i know its soon; its a casting of my dog’s paw print with the pride flag colors in it

Ever hit a deer?

no

Sang karaoke?

not in public but i’ve sang along to songs with my friends/siblings in the car

Ice skated?

i don’t think so

Ridden a motorcycle?

no

Ridden in an ambulance?

no

Stayed in the hospital?

no

Broken bones?

i think?? my pinky?? (i didn’t go to the hospital for it) and idk about my knee cap bc that’s still fucked and i didn’t go to anyone for that either so 🤷🏼‍♀️

Last phone call?

my mom

Last text?

my last text was to my friend reassuring her i was okay

Watched someone die?

i held my dog as she died on our way to the vet’s (she got hit by a car and we had to travel almost forty five minutes to an overnight emergency vet- she died like ten minutes before we got there; yes it’s her paw i want to get tattooed)

Pepsi or coke?

neither i don’t drink pop

Favorite pie?

i’m not really a pie person

Favorite pizza?

ooh uh maybe roasted veggie pizza or vegetarian buffalo chicken (i made it a week or so ago and hhhhh i want it again; everything was vegan except the chicken)

Favorite season?

fall

Favorite color?

i’m not sure maybe green

Recieved a ticket?

this question gave me anxiety i prolly jinxed myself lol

Sunrise or sunset?

sunset

Favorite Christmas song?

idk if this counts as a christmas song but i listened to it a lot the past few years in the week leading up to christmas: something ‘bout this time of year-the summer set

Cupcakes or cookies?

cookies i think but i’ll eat cupcakes too