#heyyyyyy how are we feeling tonight? :^)

[deepseagraveyard]

I want to see you, one more time.

it's CRAZY how wonderful and similar the plot/central relationships are within my two favorite series, I absolutely need other people to get this galaxy brain moment (please watch Madoka Magica: Rebellion and Fionna and Cake if you haven't yet, it's life-changing):

loving relationship is tragically doomed, person A's love for their s/o makes them the most important person in their respective universes

s/o becomes deity after using wishmaking, performs universe-bending sacrifice to save, protect, and end the suffering of person A

despite person A's freedom, they still suffer. The only thing more miserable than living their old fate is living in a universe where their s/o doesn't exist at all

s/o and person A "meet" again in a false world created from person A's mind and heart (no idea how it'll play out in F&C, I know that bus stop scene will destroy me)

person A becomes willing to sentence themself to eternal misery/entrapment to relieve others around them of the ""burden"" that is them and their grief

considering how the madoka movie ends (homura paralleling madoka's sacrifice but instead, becoming an Evil Deity™️ and reforming the universe so she can live out her desire of existing in peace with madoka + friends, I'm summarizing btw the actual ending is VERY crazy) I have NO idea how F&C will carry out simon's arc. either way I'm prepared to cry very hard. Give them their deceased god gfs back!!! I need my favorite cosmically separated couples to be together happily <3

[books-and-omens]

Heyyyyyy I’d really like to talk more about the ball, who’s with me.

Because for all its glitter, the ball is dark. No, seriously, it’s dark. It’s eerie, it’s disturbing, and the narrative doesn’t shy away from showing us just how much. 

As in a classic fairytale, mortals are being spirited away into another realm to dance through the night. Here, however, we see exactly who is orchestrating the dance, and why.

And we empathize with him, but watching Aziraphale has never been so painful or so unsettling.

Nina arrives distraught and is immediately hit with the realization that she doesn’t feel distraught, even though she knows she should be feeling it. She confronts Aziraphale and he just tells her: oh yes! :) no long faces tonight! And she is disturbed throughout the ball, thinks she is losing her mind, questions and fights the enchantment… but from time to time, the enchantment still takes hold.

And just—

Aziraphale. Aziraphale, you do know that manipulating people is wrong, don’t you? You… do know that? And yes, of course, neither Crowley’s nor Aziraphale’s approach to morality is human. They are eldritch, they are otherworldly. It was Crowley who changed the paintball guns into real guns in S1, though of course, the humans still had choice in using them.

But the ball is still different.

We’ve never seen Aziraphale do anything quite so disturbing before, or go so obviously deep into his own delusion. There are moments during these scenes when even Crowley, permanently frustrated, is very nearly disturbed. (“Angel! What are you doing?” or “Making it rain is one thing, but a BALL?”)

I fully think that by that point in the story, Aziraphale is not all right. He is in an anxiety spiral, denying reality fiercely, obstinately, disastrously, not listening to any of Crowley’s hissed warnings. Yes, yes, he is giddy, he is in love. It’s so very important for him that everything go RIGHT this night, the night he gets to dance with Crowley. Is he even aware of everything he is conjuring up, of the enchantment he has woven? The humans who step through the doors of the bookshop change: their clothing, their mood, their speech patterns… By this point, is Aziraphale doing this consciously at all? Or is reality conforming to his expectations, forcing everyone into a replica of the nineteenth century while Aziraphale himself, distracted and smitten, works himself up to inviting Crowley to dance?

In the first few episodes, as fear and danger grow, as Aziraphale is faced with the danger specifically to Crowley (I don’t see why he would risk his existence for you, Shax tells him in the car), Aziraphale only denies reality all the more fiercely, only holds on to his plans tighter, only puts more force into them and exerts more control (really, rather like the archangels with their Great Plan).

And the ball, beautiful and otherworldly and eerie as it is, is also a dire warning. 

In the morning, it will be Crowley, not Aziraphale, who will get told off for manipulating Nina and Maggie. Aziraphale won’t reflect on this. He won’t be forced to reflect, and Metatron will manipulate him in turn.

There is a plan to follow. The show must go on.

GOD the ball is so dark.

[samcarpentersgirlfriend]

HEY HEY HEYYYYYY

Would you please write Mickey Altieri x Fem reader where she is Derek’s sister, (say they are twins or something) and Mickey really likes her…

But Derek is like really overprotective because he heard what happened between Sidney and Billy a year back and is worried that something similar might happen to reader, with all the killings going on again.

You’d be amazing if you did this but don’t feel forced :) 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

hi!! sorry this one took so long, I loved the prompt and kept starting and restarting because I wanted this to be at least a little bit decent . hope this is what you wanted!! (as always, feel free to let me know if it isn’t <3)

“PROTECT ME?”|| MICKEY ALTIERI X READER 𖤐₊˚.

summary: above

word count: 1.4k

warnings: fem!reader, swearing

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹

Despite the recent string of murders, the Windsor campus remains as busy as ever. The college quad in particular is brimming with life, hordes of students rushing to their next class or simply sitting down, enjoying the warm spring sun. You yourself sit cross legged leaning against the trunk of a tree, laughing as Mickey tells you about the making of his latest short film.

“You know, you should be in one my movies.” Mickey says offhandedly. “One of my class movies. Get your mind out of the gutter.” He adds after seeing the look on your face. “Unless you want-“

The look Derek sends him is so uncharacteristic that it almost looks comedic. Almost.

“Hey, I’m kidding.” Mickey says. “It was a joke. But seriously,” he says, sending you a boyish grin that practically makes your heart skip a beat, “we should totally talk your potential film career sometime. Maybe over dinner?”

It’s hardly subtle, but you can’t bring yourself to care when Mickey Altieri is the one who’s asking. “I’d like that,” you answer simply with a smile. “I’m free tonight if you are?”

Mickey opens his mouth to speak, but he’s interrupted before he even gets a word out.

“Actually, you’ve got that test tomorrow, remember?” It’s your turn to shoot Derek a look now, irritated when he simply pouts like he’s doesn’t know exactly what he’s doing.

“Yeah, and I’ve already studied. I’ll go over my notes in the morning, Derek.” You know your tone sounds totally bitter, but you’re starting to grow annoyed with your brother. It feels like recently you’ve barely spent any alone time with Mickey, and every time you come even close, Derek swoops in with the perfect brother routine to make sure you stay firmly away from the man. Mickey asks if you want to study with him over at his place? Derek offers to come too and sits between you both the whole time. Mickey asks you to go the movies with him? Derek needs your help planning a surprise for Sidney. Mickey waits for you outside class and asks if you want to and sit outside with him? Derek overhears and invites himself along. It’s completely infuriating.

Even now, you don’t miss the way your brother keeps glancing over at his best friend, trying to be subtle but failing spectacularly. It’s like he’s worried that if he looks away for too long, Mickey will pounce on you right there and then. If only, you think to yourself. You know it’s definitely… unconventional to have a massive crush on your brother’s best friend, but how could you help yourself? With his constant flirting and all around charisma, you were always bound to fall for Mickey Altieri. And from the looks of it, he seems to like you too. Which makes Derek inability to simply get lost all the worst.

“Still, I don’t think that mom would be too happy to hear that you’re neglecting your studies to go on dates. I mean, that’s what it is right, a date?

That bastard.

You honestly don’t know why he cares so much about your potential love life - or lack of so, all thanks to his stupid meddling. You glance over to Mickey, who simply stares at Derek slightly dumbfounded. You can see the hidden annoyance in the way he tenses his jaw though, his usually carefree and casual expression clouded over with something darker.

“You tell mom and I’ll never speak to you again,” you say, only half exaggerating. “Besides, I don’t really see how it’s any of your goddamn business in the first place.”

Derek just looks at you for a moment, huffing when he’s met with nothing but your impatient gaze.

It’s Mickey who breaks the silence, clearing his throat awkwardly. “I’m gonna give you two a minute,” he says, before he disappears just out of your line of sight, his eyes locked on you as he walks away.

You decide to wait until you’re sure he’s out of earshot before talking. “What are we doing here, Derek?” You ask, exasperated. “Is this because you don’t want me dating your best friend? Do think it’s gonna make it weird or something? Hell, have you fallen out with Mickey?

“What? No, We’re fine!”

You can’t help but scoff at that. “Seriously, Der? You’ve been anything but fine all week. I mean, you’ve been my own personal Mickey guard dog recently! You don’t think you at least owe me an explanation to why that is?

Derek sighs, finally looking up to meet your gaze. “Fine. But please don’t take this wrong way, okay? I’m only trying to protect you.”

It’s so unexpected that a laugh bubbles from your throat. “Protect me? From Mickey? What the hell do you need to do that for?

“Well, what with all the… killing going on, wouldn’t you rather be safe than sorry?” And I’m not saying Mickey’s behind it,” Derek adds, seeing the look on your face, “but is that a risk you really wanna take? I mean, last time it all happened, it was Sidney’s boyfriend the entire time. And I can’t let you get hurt too, I-“

“Derek.” You sigh, your expression softening. “I’m glad that you care so much. And I understand that you’re worried - I do. But Mickey’s not Billy Loomis! He’s your best friend, for fuck sake! And even if, on the tiny, tiny off chance that he is behind it all,don’t you think that it’s my mistake to make? I trust him, Der. And if you can’t trust him, you should at least trust me. Besides, Mickey’s not even my boyfriend! Well, maybe if you actually left us alone for a minute…” You trail off, biting your lip as so not to laugh at the distaste on your brothers face.

“I still don’t like it.” He argues, his expression stern.

“And you don’t have to,” you shrug. “I like it, and I like him. A lot. You’re gonna have to learn to live with that. Can’t protect me forever.”

He sighs, and you know you’ve finally gotten through to him. “I know that. I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“And you won’t,” you say, relief washing over you as you pull Derek into a quick hug. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, it looks like if I’ve got a date to arrange.”

You don’t stand around to see Derek’s reaction to that, and you bound over to Mickey instead, finding him pacing around a nearby wall.

“So, what was all of that about?” He asks. “Is your brother pissed at me for trying to defile his sister?”

“I talked to him.” You say, pointedly ignoring that last question. “He’s okay. He only wants the best for me.”

“Hey, I only want the best for you,” Mickey says suddenly, stopping and taking your hands in his. Within an instant, you’re acutely aware of how close he’s become, and you can’t help but flick your gaze down to his lips for the briefest moment. “I would never fucking hurt you.” And he says like it’s imperative that you know.

“I know that” You murmur. You can’t help but wonder how Derek could possibly think Mickey was dangerous, not when he’s always been so caring and gentle with you. Especially not when he looks like this, so beautiful and vulnerable, with a fire burning in his eyes so fiercely that it captivates you completely.

Mickey must notice you staring, and you don’t miss the smile that tugs on his lips.

“Now that we’re alone,” he says lowly, making you shiver ever so slightly. “Can I-“

You don’t let him finish his sentence. Within an instant, your lips are on his, and you hear the breath hitch in Mickey’s throat. It takes him only a moment to regain his composure before he’s kissing you back eagerly, his hands moving to your waist in an attempt to pull you closer still. It all feels so familiar, and you can’t help but feel reassured by the comfort that fact brings you.

After what definitely isn’t long enough, you pull back and take a deep breath, the small smile on your face the perfect reflection of Mickey’s. You catch Derek’s eye and try and send him the most subtle thumbs up you can, satisfied when his frown slips ever so slightly. Small victories.

“So,” you say, turning your full attention back to Mickey once more. “What is it you were saying about dinner?”

[livelaughwhump]

Heyyyyyy! I adore your worrk!!!!!! If it's not a bother, could you possibly make something where Elliot has to be intubated because he can't seem to keep any food down?? Post captivity? If that's too graphic or you're not taking requests that's totally understandable.

Masterlist

Thank you so much!! Of course! This is such an interesting idea and I was very excited to write it! Unfortunately, this probably won't be a canon drabble, because Elliot's eating habits don't actually get this bad, but it's still a fun idea!

I hope you enjoy!

Content: disordered eating, feeding tube, self-hatred, self-deprecation, vomiting, body image issues

If I missed any content warnings, please let me know!

-

It was 2 a.m.

Normally, the team's safe house would be quiet and asleep, but tonight, a fog of anxiety and dread hung over the house and every team member inside. The lights were on and there was not a sleeping soul inside.

The team was crowded around the bathroom, watching as their youngest member violently vomited up everything in his stomach, just as he'd done for the past three nights.

Broderick was crouched behind Elliot, softly rubbing his back and whispering comforting and reassuring words into his ear. "It's okay, sweet. Just let it out, you're okay."

The rest of the team merely watched from the doorway. The looks on their faces were so terribly sad and exhausted. They hated seeing Elliot like this.

Meanwhile, Elliot's bright red face was covered in tears. Snot was running from his nose and a mix of drool and stomach bile dripped from his lips. He felt absolutely miserable and pathetic. A loud, heavy sob erupted from his chest once he'd finished. His nose and throat were burning, his mouth tasted of stomach bile, and his face was smeared with snot and tears. He felt like the physical depiction of the word 'worthless', and all the while, his friends were watching him. He'd never felt so ashamed.

"Is that all, sweet?" Broderick asked, once Elliot had finished. Elliot gave a slight nod, his face still turned toward the toilet bowl. He couldn't bear for his friends to see his face.

"How are you feeling, love?" Yvonne asked. Her voice was soft and soothing, like always, but Elliot couldn't help the shiver that ran down his back at the sound of it.

Elliot sniffled, his nose burning with the action. "I'm-I'm sorry," he mumbled, almost incoherently. "I-I thought I could do it this time. I-I thought I could..." Elliot couldn't finish his thought before he dissolved into a mess of pitiful sobs. He buried his face in his hands as Broderick continued to rub his back.

Lyra's heart broke as they watched the display. It had been almost a week since they'd started introducing real food back into Elliot's diet, but every time without fail, he threw it all back up again within a matter of hours. He was losing more weight and his skin was growing paler by the day. Lyra didn't know what to do, but they hoped Broderick would.

"Why don't we get you back to bed, love?" Yvonne offered.

Elliot choked on his sobs. "I-I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Don't be sorry, darling. You didn't do anything wrong," Yvonne said as she helped Elliot to his feet. He wobbled a bit, and Yvonne had to help him stand. It had been getting harder and harder for him to remain standing for long periods of time. He was growing too weak, and that thought terrified Lyra. Elliot couldn't afford to keep losing weight. Pretty soon, he wouldn't have anything left to lose.

As Yvonne led Elliot back to his room, the rest of the team stared at Broderick, waiting for him to answer the unasked question hanging above their heads.

Broderick sighed and shrugged. "This isn't good, you guys."

Landon scoffed. "Yeah, I think we got that."

Broderick threw his hands into the air in exasperation. "Then, what do you want me to say, Landon?" The medic exclaimed. Yvonne approached from the direction of Elliot's room, silently entering the circle, but no one seemed to notice her. "I wish I could tell you that everything's okay, but it's not! This is the fourth night in a row that he's woken up vomiting, and nothing that I've tried has worked! I thought this was just a mild case of refeeding syndrome, but it's so much worse than I thought and I don't know what to do! Is that what you wanna hear, Landon?" There were tears in Broderick's eyes now, and one by one, they began to fall.

Lyra's lower lip was wobbling. "There's nothing else we can do?" She asked, her voice trembling almost as much as her lip. All eyes turned to her. Broderick lowered his head. Lyra suppressed the sobs building in her chest. "Please, Broderick. I can't lose him again. There has to be something else we can do. Please!"

Broderick shook his head. "Lyra, I'm-"

"No!" Lyra interrupted. "There has to be something else! I don't care what it is! I'm not just going to give up on him, like everyone else in his life has!" Lyra took a deep breath to steady themself. They were exhausted and frustrated and so, so scared. "I'm not just going to let him die, Broderick. That's not an option."

Broderick sighed again, his tense shoulders heaving. "Lyra, I-" he broke off, a thoughtful look on his face. After a few seconds of tense anticipation, Broderick said, "There may be one last thing we can do."

Lyra's eyes widened, but before she had the chance to ask, Yvonne beat her to it, "What is it?"

Broderick bit his lip and scrunched his nose. "The only thing I can think of is implementing a feeding tube."

Landon, Karine, and Lyra all exchanged wordless looks. "A feeding tube?" Lyra repeated. Broderick nodded. "So, what exactly does that entail?"

Broderick folded both arms over his chest. "I would insert a nasogastric tube into his nose, through his oesophagus, and into his stomach."

"But it wouldn't make him throw up?" Yvonne asked.

Broderick shrugged. "It shouldn't, but there's no guarantee. It's only a short-term solution, but it should at least get his stomach used to being full again."

"But what if it doesn't work?" Landon asked.

"Then, our only other option is to take him to the hospital."

Karine shook her head. "Not an option. I don't trust hospitals the way I trust you, Rick, and you know why."

"So, you want me to do it?"

"Shouldn't we talk to Elliot first?" Lyra asked. "This is about his wellbeing, after all."

Broderick nodded. "Of course. It'll be completely up to him. We'll ask him first thing tomorrow morning."

The sound of a soft sniffle followed and all eyes turned toward Elliot's room. Elliot stood in the doorway, wrapped in a fluffy blanket, with the most miserable expression on his face.

"Oh, darling, what are you doing out here?" Yvonne asked, rushing to his side. Elliot turned his gaze down to his feet. "You should be in bed."

Elliot sniffled again. "Just...heard yelling, and I...I'm sorry for eavesdropping."

"Don't be sorry, bud," Landon said. "Hey, it saves us the trouble of having to tell you."

Elliot didn't say anything. He swayed on his feet, but even he didn't know if that was from exhaustion or nerves. He'd heard absolutely everything, and the deep anxiety in the pit of his stomach only worsened with each second of silence.

"So," Broderick began. "What do you think?"

Elliot glanced up. "About what?" He asked.

"About...going on a feeding tube," Broderick clarified. Elliot's face turned pink and his gaze wavered. "It's completely your decision."

Elliot's chin was trembling. "Will-Will it hurt?"

"No, sweetheart, of course not. I would never do anything to hurt you. It might be a little uncomfortable going in, but I can give you some pain meds, and after a while, you won't even know it's there."

Elliot bit his bottom lip to stop the trembling. "If-If I don't do it, am-am I gonna...am I gonna die?" Unlike Elliot's last question, this one was met with hesitation. Elliot's heart dropped as tears flooded his dull eyes. "I don't-I don't wanna die," he cried. "I don't wanna-" Elliot's weak legs gave out as he buried his face in his hands and sobbed.

Lyra rushed over to his side and caught him just before he hit the ground. They gently sat and positioned him on their lap, hugging him and rocking him gently. "It's okay, sunshine, you're not gonna die. I won't let that happen to you."

Elliot wept into Lyra's shoulder. "I'm...s-scared."

"I know, love, but it's going to be okay. Broderick's done this before." Lyra turned their gaze on the lurking medic. "Right?" They questioned.

Broderick nodded. "Of course, I've done this loads of time, back in..." Broderick broke off and glanced at Karine, who wore an unreadable expression. "Um...I'll just have to gather the supplies and we can get started whenever you're ready."

Elliot sniffled and looked up with teary eyes. "Wh-What if I'm never ready?"

Lyra hugged him tighter and carded their fingers through his hair. "It'll be all right, Elliot."

Elliot shook his head, pleading eyes staring into Lyra's. "But I don't wanna do this." His voice was small and quivering and it broke Lyra's heart.

"You'll be fine. I'll be there the whole time to hold your hand and talk you through it. Like Broderick said, it won't hurt. It'll just be a little inconvenient for a while. That's all."

Elliot's gaze dropped to the floor. "Okay," he whispered.

Lyra forced a weak smile as they cupped Elliot's face in their hands. "Hey," they said, bringing his attention back up to their eyes. "Everything's gonna be fine. I promise."

Elliot looked absolutely pathetic. His cheeks were sunken and covered in tears. His eyes were red and swollen, snot dripped from his nose and his sandy-blond locks stuck to his sweaty forehead. He was in desperate need of a bath, and probably a hug. Luckily, Lyra was able to provide one of those things in that moment.

Lyra wrapped their arms around the small man on their lap and gently squeezed. Under normal circumstances, Lyra would've hugged him as tight as they possibly could, but now, he was so small and frail that they feared they would crush him if they tried. So, they simply opted to gently hold him against their chest and whisper softly into his ear, "I won't leave your side, sunshine. I won't let you go through this alone, I promise."

. . .

After some brief deliberation, the team ultimately decided to wait until the next morning to implement Elliot's feeding tube. The poor man was already terrified, and performing the procedure at two in the morning with little to no sleep didn't seem like the best idea.

All in all, the procedure took a little over an hour. Elliot had tried his best not to fight it, to remain perfectly still, but he'd been shaking the whole time. The worst part of it was when Elliot had to swallow to tube down himself. It was uncomfortable and invasive and the panic that overwhelmed him made his throat feel tight, which only worsened the discomfort.

When it was finally over, Broderick held a mirror up to his face and said, "What do you think?"

Elliot stared at his reflection as Lyra encouragingly squeezed his hand. There was a thin tube sticking out of his right nostril, hooking around his ear. The tube was taped to his face, and Elliot could make out some sort of colorless liquid moving through it.

The sight made him want to cry, but he forced a fake smile to his face and said, "Th-Thank you, Broderick."

Broderick smiled back. "You feeling okay?"

Elliot nodded. "Just...tired."

"Okay, get some rest, then. I'll be just out here if you need me." Elliot nodded again and Broderick quickly left him and Lyra alone. The second that Broderick was gone, tears began to slip down Elliot's face. He continued to stare at his reflection in the handheld mirror. His hands shaking as he did so.

"Elliot?" Lyra said. Elliot flinched, having completely forgotten that they were even there. "What's wrong? Does it hurt?"

Elliot shook his head and began furiously scrubbing at the tears on his face. "I hate this," he sobbed, dropping the mirror and burying his face in his hands.

Lyra held his hand. "What do you mean?"

A particularly loud sob came from Elliot's throat. "I-I hate b-being so ugly and u-useless! I hate that I can't eat like-like a normal person! I hate that I-that I look like this." Elliot's shoulders heaved with each loud sob he released. His whole body was trembling. "I just want to be normal," he mumbled. The words were muffled by his hands, but Lyra still understood.

Hearing that broke Lyra's heart. It hurt them enough to know that he needed the feeding tube, but to hear that it was only making him hate himself more than he already did? They didn't know what to do. He didn't deserve any of this.

"Well, it-it won't be on long," Lyra assured him. "It's just until your stomach gets used to being full again. Then, we can take it out and try out regular eating again."

Elliot shook his head. "I'm so ugly," he cried.

"No, sunshine, you're not. You are not ugly. You're still pretty, even with the tube."

Elliot lifted his face from his hands and gazed at the mirror once more. He took a few minutes to look at himself once more before he looked at Lyra and said, "I don't feel pretty."

Lyra's heart dropped. "Oh, sunshine." She scooted closer to him and gathered him in her arms, guiding his head to rest on her shoulder. "I'm so sorry. I wish we didn't have to do this to you, but we didn't have a choice. We weren't trying to make you feel ugly or useless. We just want you to get better. We want you to love yourself again."

Elliot sniffed. "I just want all of this to be over," he whispered.

"I know, sunshine. Someday, it will be. I promise. This won't last forever."

Elliot gently touched the tube running from his nose and behind his ear. As much as he hated it, he had to remind himself that it would make him better, which would make his teammates happy. All he wanted was to make his teammates happy.

Elliot glanced up at his best friend. "Do you...really think I'm pretty?"

Lyra smiled. "You're beautiful."

Elliot's gaze dropped. "But would you say that even if I wasn't?"

"Elliot," Lyra snapped.

Elliot's face burned bright red, and he hunched his shoulders to try and hide it. "I'm sorry," he squeaked.

Lyra sighed. "This is only going to make you feel better. We'll take it off once you've gained a bit of weight."

Elliot nodded. "Okay."

Lyra tilted their head to the side. "Are you gonna be okay?"

Elliot shrugged and laid down atop his soft bed. "Just...wanna sleep 'n f-forget about...everything."

Lyra nodded, helping him pull the soft comforter up to his neck. "I think that's a good idea. You've had a long twelve hours." She pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead and began to make her way out of the room, but not before she turned and whispered, "Goodnight, sunshine."

Elliot sniffled. "Goodnight, Lyra."

Once he was all alone again, he closed his eyes and started to cry.

-

Sorry this took so long! I've been super busy and haven't had much time to write! Also, sorry if this isn't entirely medically accurate lol, I'm not a doctor. I hope you enjoyed, though!

If anyone else has any drabble requests, suggestions, or questions for me or my characters, please send them to me!

Taglist:

@l-antre-des-merveilles @pigeonwhumps @nicolepascaline @burningkittypoet @whumpinggrounds @suffering-and-misery @make-them-scream @honeycollectswhump @rabass @whumpdreamz @clairelsonao3 @rosewriteswhump @cepheusgalaxy @pinkraindropsfell @mj-or-say10 @considerablecolors

If anyone else wants to be added to or removed from the taglist, please let me know!😊

Or if you only want to be tagged in main chapters

[nightlifeseries]

Tori in college Pt 5

Jane: Heyyyyyy ladies. How are we feeling tonight. *taps mic* Is this thing on? 

April: Girl stop goofing around. The professor should be here any minute. 

Lena is sitting by the lecture room across the hall. Lena sees Tori in the hall before class. 

Lena: Hey Tori ! 

Tori: Hey how are you? Are you gonna head to the lecture? 

Lena: Yea. I grabbed a bit to eat first. This professor is usually late. Have you heard about the party tonight?? 

Tori: I heard there were a couple. 

Lena: Are you going? 

Tori: Yea you know it. 

Lena: I hear all the fine boys from the other sobriety will be there. 

Tori: Really? I am ready for some new meat. I look forward to it. 

Lena: LOL 

Youtube

[peachsayshi]

HEYYYYYY PEACH!!! It’s your evil!suguru advocate anon here (hope you missed me 😉). I like to self appoint myself as your voice of reason 💕 which means I heavily encourage you to write about evil!suguru. I know I said I’ll wait a while (like this 🧍🏻‍♀️) cause you were being oh so generous with the drabbles you made for my previous asks but imagine how happy I was when I saw your post on evil!suguru x Virgin reader 🥹. So the moment you’ve been waiting for😈… “hi peach! Voice of reason here, PLEASE PLEASE WRITE ABOUT YOUR IDEA IF THE INSPIRATION IS THERE!! I mean we can all agree that he is the love of our lives and we should really celebrate that don’t you agree? *whispers* you know you want toooooo~ hey peach I just had this AMAZING idea I think you should hear 😃 ✨evil suguru✨ ahhahahahahaha 😀😐🫣🥵” Well, that’s all I have to say and I leave it to you to make your final decision 🫡

Hello, my Evil!Suguru Nonnie! 💕💕

I hope you didn't think that I have forgotten about this post. I just need to find myself in the right kind of mood to write evil!suguru and it seems like it’s your lucky day 😈

A/N: (minors & ageless blogs dni)

TAGS: geto being evil & manipulative, forbidden romance, corruption kink, dub con, virgin reader, cock warming, fluffy and angsty at the same time? 

For Suguru, being with you is about possession - it’s about claiming your body as his own in every way possible. He thrives off your naivety and takes pride in watching you squirm because it feeds into his power over you. 

You were such a meek human, humbly arriving at his temple with your vulnerability on your sleeve, and pleading him to save you. He happily cured you of all your ailments...but he manipulated you into being indebted to him, which meant that he had a perfect excuse of keeping you around. 

Nobody had the courage to question why he had one of these “monkeys” shadowing his every movements but Suguru made it a point to emphasize that he was making an example of the lesser kind. 

He still had his reputation to uphold despite what was happening behind closed doors. 

Suguru secretly indulged in using your body to service him, sadistically challenging himself by basking in the pleasure of your company.

He enjoyed tasting you between your legs, and playing with your own sanity as he edged you to your release. He humiliated you by having you ride him bare, repeatedly making a mess of his clothes every single time you both climaxed. He kept you close to his chest as he watched you touch yourself with sheer amusement, taking in your breathless cries when you reached your orgasm. 

You were an object for his own entertainment, but tonight he had failed to commit to his cardinal rule of refusing to have sex with you. 

How was he supposed to hold back after you admitted your inexperience? 

He could feel you trembling beneath him when he aligned the tip of his cock to to your entrance. Your nails dragging down his chest and leaving strikes of red when he finally pushed, and your eyes rolled to the back of your head from the unfamiliar sensation. 

His heart pulsed against your palm and Suguru intertwined his fingers with your own to allow you to squeeze his hand instead. Your body relaxed underneath his strong frame, your lashes flattering back open and you were surprised to meet the tender gaze in his eyes. 

Your lips parted when you inhaled, the warmth rushing to your face from how close his mouth was to your own.  You’ve always thought he was striking, but with him merely inches from you, you were able to really see the beautiful details in his features.

You contemplated his face, mapping over him as he found himself doing the same thing with you. 

His eyes were dark, like the mysterious abyss of space, and mirroring the locks of his hair. You could see the slight bags underneath them, taking a moment to ponder if he ever actually got a full night’s rest. You followed the line of his nose before focusing your full attention on his lips. 

You gulped at the realization that he’s never actually kissed you before, and shivered when you were reminded with the fact that it’s because doesn’t care for you.

He was repulsed by you - by your kind, and you knew that he truly hated you with every fiber of his being.

A fact that he repeatedly shared.

There was a fear that climbed up your throat because you knew that this man would hurt you. You threw caution out the window when you gave yourself to him, instantly regretting not thinking this through and wishing you didn’t just follow his command like an obedient fool.

You turned your head away. 

Your fingers tightened around his hold, but then released when you felt a kiss on the side of your neck. The act was so soft, you didn’t even notice the brush of Suguru’s lips on your skin. Then there was second one just below your ear, a third to your collarbone, a fourth to your shoulder.. each one steadying your erratic heart. 

“You’re lovely...” he murmured against your ear, in a tone that was completely foreign to the deadly shaman you’ve grown accustomed to serving. 

Your mind must be playing tricks on you and you returned to meet his stare for clarification, “I’m-I’m sorry, Master Geto, I didn’t hear-”

His lips met yours, and everything went still.

You didn’t expect your body melting into him as little sparkles twinkled behind your closed lids. You didn’t expect him to loosen his hand and allow you to tenderly caress his jaw when he slowly took the time to taste you. Nor did you expect him to sigh with relief as he lifted away before pressing his forehead on top of yours. 

He held your cheek in his hand, his thumb tracing over your puffed bottom lip.

“Nobody can know,” he breathed.

His words were cold enough to put out the slow flame that had been sparked, and you recognized the unspoken threat when he slowly laced his hand around your neck.

As long as you kept your mouth shut, you would be protected.

Yet, there was something else in his order that you couldn’t brush over - something that could have easily been mistaken as desperation.

You nodded your head agreement.

Suguru tracked his hand down to your waist, while the other held one of your thighs open.

“Good girl,” he praised while hiding his smile against your neck, before pulling out and making you moan in response as he carefully thrusted back in.

TAGS: @damn-geto @pensivespecter @ekaterinatepes @jelly-jellx @lollipopd @shuxjodie @mikasackrmann @alreadyblondenow @nanamikentcs @aizumie @mrsmorgenstern @artemisthestar @velvetlight333 @sluttoru @smoothy-ve @bisexualwomanofcolour @bloombb @shadowsorceress @dont-ask-me-pls   

[devils-dares]

heyyyyyy! first off, congratulations on 100!!! you so deserve it!

next, i'm here to request prompt 34 from prompt list 1 because i'm feeling v soft tonight.

i hope you have a lovely rest of your night! 🥰

thank you so much, my love!

34. “Why are you wearing my sweater?” “Because it smells like you.”

The coffee pot was practically empty by the time you went to go refill for what must’ve been at least the fourth time in two hours. Not wanting to waste any longer yawning, you settled for the coffee ground laden liquid at the bottom of the pot. Putting a couple extra sugars in the steaming cup to balance the bitterness, you grabbed your cup and settled back into your floor nest of legal paperwork.

It was now 1:47 AM and you were sure that whichever intern at the DA’s office sorted these papers was going to have the pleasure of being strangled by you. Highlighting words and key phrases wasn’t fun, but it would help Foggy and Matt with progressing in the case. Sighing, you spoke out loud to yourself, stopping every few minutes to rub the sleep out of your eyes. You let your head rest on your hand as you read, which turned out to not be the smartest move as you fell asleep.

About 30 minutes later, you were awoken by heavy pants and pained grunts. You snapped up and snuck into Foggy’s office, grabbing the baseball bat he kept by his desk. Heading to the kitchenette, you raise the bat and before the man on the ground could say anything, you whacked him with it.

“Ow! Wait, stop!” You hear him say. He struggles to get up and once he does, you slowly back up until he hits the lightswitch, illuminating his figure and more specifically, the horns on his head.

“You’re- you’re devilman, uh, Daredevil! What the fuck are you doing in my office?” You say, putting the bat down.

“Heh, good question. What are you doing here at 2 in the morning?” He says as he finally stands straight. It’s then that you realize how much bigger he is than you.

“Just- uh, work for my bosses. Let me grab a first aid kit, I know we have one. You see, I uh, got a boss, little bit of a klutz, that one. He’s blind and always comes in bleeding in some way. I keep it stocked for emergencies.” You walk to your desk, situated next to Karen’s. Digging through your drawer, you finally find the bright red box. As you walk back to the kitchenette, you see that he’s taken his cowl off.

“Oh! Sorry, here I’ll just leave it on the counter.”

“You’re wearing my sweater, did you take it from my office?” He says as he turns around.

“Matt? Holy fuck! Come here and sit down, let me patch you up. Oh gosh, I hit you with Foggy’s bat, I’m so sorry that must’ve hurt.” He chuckles at your rushed words.

“Take a breath, sweetheart. I’m okay.” He finally takes a seat and helps you take his top off.

“My god, Matt.” He grabs your hand as you gasp at the vast amount of cuts, scars, and bruises.

“It’s alright, most of them look worse than they actually are. If you don’t want to help me, I understand.” You shake your head at that.

“No, I got you.” Wetting a rag with rubbing alcohol, you grimace when he sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth.

“So I’m a klutz, huh?” He chuckles.

“Shut up, had I known you were parading as the devil at night, I would’ve just said insane. How do you even… you’re blind, right?”

“Yes. It’s… complicated. I was blinded by chemicals, so, to make a long story short, when it took away my eyesight it enhanced my other senses. I can kind of see a weird 360 outline of everything.”

“Yeah, complicated.” The two of you fall in a comforting silence.

“You don’t have any other questions? Don’t want to scream at me or hit me?”

“No, I’m just, I’m thankful for you, Matthew.”

“You- you are?” He questions, but the steady rhythm of your heart tells him that you’re not lying.

“Yeah, absolutely. You’ve saved so many people… including me.”

“Seriously?” He tilts his head towards you, eyes glazed over but still conveying concern.

“Yeah, uh, my fourth night in Hell’s Kitchen. My friends made me swear up and down that I’d go out with them. I came out a little tipsy and was shoved in an alley, but before the dude could lay a single finger on me, the devil was there. And now the devil’s my boss, so there’s that fantasy out the window.”

“Fantasy? You fantasize about me?” A smirk plays on his lips.

“Cram it, Murdock.”

“Okay, answer this question then.”

“Can’t you read minds?”

“What? No! Who told y- anyways. Why are you wearing my sweater?”

“It- I uh, hm. It’s cold, and I forgot my jacket.”

“No you didn’t, it’s right over there on your chair. So don’t lie to me.”

“Fine! It smells like you, okay? And it doesn’t hurt that it’s oversized and criminally soft and warm and- mmf!” You’re cut off as he presses his lips to yours. Your hands slowly inch their way up his face to finally tangle in his hair as his hands hold your hips in a featherlight touch.

“I’m sorry, I just really wanted to do that. You’re cute when you try to reason your way out of things.”

“Yeah, well I’m not the lawyer here, am I? And uh, if you ever happen to get the urge to kiss me again, you go ahead and do that.” He rumbles out a laugh.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Are you all done playing doctor?”

“Yeah, yeah. Shut it, your bandages look pretty. Please don't scare me again.”

“After that whack with Foggy’s bat? I’ll be sure to announce my arrival.”

You groan out an apology and he kisses your forehead.

“Can I ask you another question?” He murmurs, lips still against your forehead.

“What am I, on the witness stand?”

“Why are you here?”

“To save your ass, of course.”

“I’m being serious.” He cups your face in his hands, stroking your cheeks with his thumbs.

“Realistically, I hate being alone. I can't stand it. I can't sleep, can't unwind. I come here to do work and burn my brain out so I can't overthink anything.”

“Come home with me.”

“I’m not subjecting you to my snoring and drooling.”

“No judgement. And you can take as many sweaters as you'd like.”

“...Promise?”

He laughs and kisses you again.

“I couldn't say no to you even if I tried.”

[sinfulspencer]

HEYYYYYY RO!! CONGRATS ON THE 600! I meant to send an ask.. but I forgot-

Cherry: send me a song you love and I'll write a blurb for it!

So the song is..

Drum roll please

Boyfriend by Dove Cameron!

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Rating: mature (18+, minors DNI)

Warnings: cheating, dirty talking, hair pulling, vaginal fingering, semi-public foreplay

Words: 1.9k

A.N.: I love cocky Spencer. He’s a bitch. Also, that song gave me slutty vibes so I had to write a smut blurb. Hope you like it.

Aurora's 3k followers celebration Send your request here. I have my anons turned off for personal reasons, but if you want to request something and stay anonymous (so people won't see your @ when I post your request) please DM me.

I can’t believe we’re finally alone I can’t believe I almost went home What are the chances? Everyone’s dancing And he’s not with you The universe must have divined this What am I gonna do? Not grab your wrist?

“Thank you for staying with me tonight.”

Spencer leaned against the car door. “I’m sorry he ditched you.”

Sighing, I looked down at the tip of my shoes. “He’s a bit of a dick sometimes.”

“It’s your birthday and he left you here to go bowling with his friends.” - he added, crossing his arms to his chest - “I’m not sure he’s just ‘a bit of a dick’. I’d say he’s an ass.”

Snorting at the choice of his words, I shrugged. “He’ll make it up to me, I hope.”

Despite my date’s behaviour, I enjoyed the night out with Spencer. It had been so long since we spent some time together and it felt refreshing to convince him to dance with me, share orange juice non-alcoholic shots with him and laugh at the people who were dancing on the tables. 

“I’m not sure he will, darling.” - Spencer said, glancing behind me - “He was supposed to celebrate your birthday with you and…”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” - I shut the conversation down - “Stop it.”

He nodded, accepting my limit. “Sorry.”

I leaned besides Spencer against my car, staring at the dark sky above us. He was right, my boyfriend was supposed to be with me for the night but instead he chose to be with his friends - people he sees almost every day at work, at his place, everywhere while he struggled to find free days to be with me. 

Maybe it wasn’t meant to be between us. 

“We’re alone now.”

I turned to look at my friend. “Yes, we are.”

I didn’t read too much into his words, leaning my head on his shoulders and allowing Spencer to hold me in his arms. He smelled like peaches - and maybe it was because I spilled my peach juice all over his shirt before we came out of the club. 

Spencer tapped the back of my hand. “Listen, there’s something important that you should know.”

“Hm?”

“I could be a better boyfriend than him.”

My lips parted at his implication and I pulled away from him. “Spencer, I…”

“Have you never thought about this before, hm?” - he asked, taking a step closer and putting himself in front of me - “Are you denying how happy you are to be with me right now?”

I couldn’t talk, completely flabbergasted by the way he was behaving. I had a hint something was going to happen between me and Spencer when he held me in his arms and danced with me inside the club, but… I never pictured us together the same way I should have.

Spencer would’ve been a much better suitor for me than the dickhead I was with, I didn’t have any doubts on that - and maybe I should’ve thought about it.

“I, listen…”

He silenced me, cradling my face in the palm of his hands. “I am a better boyfriend than him.”

Spencer kissed me before I could reply to him, before I could even think about pushing him away - and maybe I didn’t want to. Maybe I was waiting for a chance to taste his lips, for having a glance of how my life would turn if I chose him instead. 

Pressed with my back to my car, Spencer kissed me to prove to me that everything I was feeling in that moment - anger, passion, devotion, happiness - could be amplified if I let him do what he was silently begging me to. He could turn those feelings into something powerful, into something so intense that would burn both of us and leave us craving for more. 

My lips desperately searched for his’ when Spencer pulled away to breath, before diving back in for another kiss. My hands were pawing at his chest, trying to find a way to get what I wanted without making the situation more messy than it already was.

I was celebrating my birthday with my friend instead of my boyfriend.

And I was kissing that friend, instead of my boyfriend - but I didn’t care, it felt too good for me to stop and realise how wrong everything was. At that moment, it felt like all those pieces of a puzzle came together and formed the most beautiful of images.

Spencer ran his hands down my waist, reaching for my thighs. “If I could give you some advice, I would leave with me tonight.”

He didn’t need to tell me that twice, because I was already nodding my head. 

Our lips connected again while his hands sneaked underneath my skirt, feeling the warmth of my skin finally in contact with his fingers. Despite the weather being slightly colder than usual, I was burning up - a fire deep within me was spreading through my body and I needed Spencer to extinguish it. 

“Spencer..”

He silenced me again with a peck on my lips, looking around in the parking lot. “I wasn’t joking when I told you we were alone.”

Gasping at his implication, I pressed my hands on top of his. “We can’t, it’s… What if someone sees us? You can’t get caught with your hands under my skirt like a pervert.”

“Hm, maybe I like that.” - he shrugged, making me chuckle - “This would be just the prelude of something else, if you want.”

I hesitated, looking around in a desperate attempt to make sure there was no one else besides us in the parking lot. There were people near the entrance of the club and there were cars driving around, but they were all far away from us - and couldn’t really see what was going down between me and Spencer. 

When I turned to Spencer, I smiled at him. “Make me feel good.”

“Gladly, darling.”

Spencer leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss at the base of my neck, before pulling away and staring at me while his hands did all the talking. I knew he wanted to kiss me again and I was dying to feel those lips against mine, but we had to be alert - we couldn’t get caught like that. 

We didn’t want to, despite the idea being incredibly arousing. 

“Stop me if it’s too much or if you change your mind, okay?” - he said, brushing his fingers over the damp spot in my panties - “You’re already soaked. Fuck.”

I brought my right hand behind his neck, nodding. “Yes, yes. Please, touch me.”

“Anything for the birthday girl.” - Spencer replied, hooking his index under the smooth fabric of my panties - “But I need you to look at me the whole time. Can you do that for me, angel?”

Nodding my head once more, I ran my fingers through his curls while Spencer slid his index between my folds. He could feel how wet I was - and it wasn’t just because his cock was pressed to my inner thigh, but also because he was taking someone who didn’t belong to him. 

It turned me on, it was so hot, so intoxicating. 

“So pretty and so needy, aren’t you?” 

I bit my bottom lip, rolling my hips so that he would get the hint. I needed to be touched and I needed to feel his for a few moments - I needed to know how it felt to belong to Spencer for one night. 

“I dreamed about doing this for so long, angel. Touching you like you deserve, bringing you pleasure, serving you like I know I was meant to.” - Spencer leaned forward and gave me a kiss on the lips, while his index pressed against my entrance - “Do you feel what you do to me, angel? Do you feel how badly I want you?”

I was trembling under his touch, completely under his spell. “Yes. Please, Spencer.”

His index slipped right inside of me and I was forced to suppress a long moan, covering my mouth with one hand before I collapsed against Spencer’s chest. If there were any people around us, they would  probably think we were hugging.

I squeezed my thighs around his hand, but Spencer didn’t stop touching me. His fingers caressed me and stroked me from the inside, eliciting more moans that crashed against his chest so that nobody could hear us. No matter how exciting the idea of getting caught was, I couldn’t let that happen. 

Just like how I should've let that moment happen, but my frustration and my pent-up desire towards Spencer got the best of me.

“Don’t hold back, angel.” - Spencer whispered, using his free hand to grab me by the chin - “ Let me hear how much you like when I touch you.”

I stared into his eyes, forgetting about the music coming from behind us and the sound of cars passing through. I focused on the pleasure he was bringing me with his fingers, pushing me closer and closer to that delicious edge I was seeking. 

The way he was looking at me made everything feel even better. 

“So good, Spencer.” - I whimpered, grasping the car handle with a hand - “So good.”

His fingers pressed inside of me as I covered my mouth with a hand, hiding my face against his chest. Spencer chuckled when he realised how close I was and how I was slowly losing control, as my moans became louder.

He was basking in the pleasure he was bringing me, moving his hips against my thighs in an attempt to get some relief. I wanted to bring him the same amount of pleasure, but his fingers kept going in and out of me at a quick pace - I was too distracted, too needy to do anything. 

His name fell from my lips in the shape of moans and curses, before the pleasure washed over me and tingles ran through my body. 

“That’s it, angel. Come for me, come on my fingers.”

Spencer’s voice encouraged me to move my hips, riding my orgasm ‘til I was completely flushed against his body and I couldn’t breathe right. Every inch of my body was on fire as I hid my face in the crook of his neck, repressing every whimper that could roll off my tongue. 

When I was able to catch my own breath, I laid pressed to his body. Spencer pulled his fingers out of me and brought them up to his lips with no shame, staring at me as his tongue cleaned my essence off.

My thighs were shaking and I felt my face get hotter, blushing hard at the sight in front of me. He was so shameless and I loved it, probably more than I should have.

“Spencer, fuck.”

“Next time you’ll see him, you’ll remember this moment.” - Spencer whispered to me, grabbing my chin - “Unless..”

I slid my arms down on his chest, struggling to hold onto the fabric of his shirt. How could he talk to me about my boyfriend after what he just did to me? Giving me what I had been craving from him for months? 

“You..” - I whimpered, straightening my skirt with my trembling fingers - “Take me home. Now.”

Spencer hesitated.

“If you want to show me that you’re better than him, take me home.” - I added, looking up to meet his gaze - “I dare you to do it.”

Spencer waited to see any sign of hesitance on my features, but I wanted to be with him more than anything. I was in a relationship, but a failing one and I had no shame in admitting how horrible and wrong the situation was.

It didn’t change anything. As a matter of fact, it turned me on even more.

Trouble came in pairs, so what was wrong about jumping in feet first?

[duckugou]

get you the moon

Bakugou x female reader

cw: a lil angst, comfort

aged up

come to my asks to be a part of my taglist! just let me know what kinds of fics/ what fandom/ what characters/ etc you want to be tagged in!

Requests are open!!

-----------------------------

|Bakugou POV|

Seeing her with someone else killed me. Every single time. Sure, she said she was single, but I see the way they look at each other. He looks at her like she's the entire world- which she is. But shes my world. Shouldn't be his. Maybe I'm just selfish. I don't care.

Being around her gave me hope- something I lost a while back. Something I had given up. She gives me that smile and its like everything's okay. She saved my life and doesn't even know it. She's the reason I'm still hanging on. Like that song she always plays and sings to, Get you the moon? "You are, you are the reason my head is still above water" is a good line. "If I could, id get you the moon" God I really would.

But now, his hand is trailing closer to hers and I swear to god if he holds it, I'm going to lose it.

"Y/N! Come here!!" I shouted across the party we were at, making her head jerk to see me, her face filling with light and a smile.

She runs up to me, "Hey Kats, whats up," her embrace is everything right now. No amount of alcohol could compare.

"Nothin- hey want a drink?" I asked, turning towards the kitchen, the y/c/h haired girl following me close by.

"Nah, I'm the D.D tonight." (Designated driver) She spoke over the music.

"Oh- for him?" I seethed.

"Just for like anyone who needs it. You know me, Kats," She giggled, slapping my arm.

That's another thing about her. Shes so damn selfless. Most parties she went to, she didn't drink, just in case someone needed a sober helping hand. She would keep her eyes peeling for other girls that might be in danger or anything- she would swoop in and save the day. She's like the sister everyone needed.

"Don’t fuckin hit me, stupid. Anyways- hows things with uh-. Ya know," I asked, dreading the answer, nodding my head towards the tall guy she was just standing with.

"What do you mean?"

"Like, are you official yet?"

"Officially friends. He's not my type- like at all. He's nice but I mean I've kind of had eyes for someone else," She giggled.

"oh." I snapped. "Well, I need to get back to Kirishima. Sure he needs me or something." I began walking away, leaving her with a sad, confused look.

"Catch up later?" She shouted to me. I waved her off.

So not only is this other fucking prick trying to get with her- but shes got her eyes on another?! Unreal. How is this happening? Shes MY love. Why doesn't she realize that.

I downed my drink, the burning feeling distracting me for a moment. I needed something else. Someone else.

I looked around the room at all the ladies at the party. Nice asses, skinny waists, high ponytails. But none were looking around, ready to help. None had a light in their eyes. None seemed genuine. Not like her.

"Hey hey Bakubro, whats got ya lurkin round the room," Kirishima yelled to me, slapping his arm around my shoulder. I shrugged him off.

"Nothin. Whats got ya drunk already?"

"Oh the usual mixture- where's Y/n?"

"Don't know." I snapped back.

"Oh jeez something has YOU twisted. Alright I gotta go find everyone else- HEYYYYYY-" Kirishima walked off shouting, not wanting to deal with me. Understandable. She was the only one that cared genuinely.

Fuck this is so stupid, I'm jealous of someone that I don't even know!

I went off to find Y/n to maybe apologize? I don't know. Everything is starting to get a bit more fuzzy.

I spotted her through the balcony doors, and went out to join her.

"Oh, hey Kats," she sighed, looking anywhere but at my eyes.

"H-hey I'm sorry about stormin off. I wanna be supportive. Who's the guy you got your eyes on then?" I wanted her to be happy, right?

"O-oh. Nobody." She sighed.

"Really? Because you seemed pretty psyched about him a little bit ago," I inquired.

"Yeah, I mean he's amazing but he doesn't want me," she said, looking off the balcony.

"Well any guy that doesn't want you is a fucking moron," I said, getting mad that some guy would make her feel this way.

She laughed bitterly. "Yeah. He is pretty stupid. He's taller than me, hes got really nice hair, his smile is so nice even if he doesn’t show it often. Hes honestly a dick to most people but once you get to know him, hes the sweetest. Plus He’s gonna be a pro fucking hero. I've grown so close to him, I think I might love him but I don't know."

A bitter taste came to my mouth. He sounded vaguely like me, but she didn't like me?

"Oh. He sounds cool." I said, quietly.

"Y'know Katsuki, I knew you were dumb but I didn't know the extent of it I guess," She said, looking me in my eyes for the first time on the balcony that night.

"Tch- what?"

"You're the only guy I know with a attitude like that, idiot."

Realization hit me like a fucking train. She started giggling, and a smile grew on my face. I grabbed her by the waist and kissed her finally.

I was jealous of my fucking self all night.

[k8fics]

No Pressure

summary: sexting Bo can go many ways (based on the paragraph of consent during Inside)

rating: PG-13 (Bo is 30; reader is 23+), fluff but smut if you squint

Sexting Bo can go many different ways. Most of the time, it ends with you and him satisfied with the results of texting emojis. Or sometimes, like tonight, things end with him begging you to come over.

earlier that day

At 9:38, you received a text from the lengthy man;

BO: heyyyyyy

Y/N: 🙌🏻

BO: 🫂🏡⁉️

Y/N: 🤷‍♀️

BO: 🙏

Y/N: i like when you beg

BO: sooo are you coming over or not ⁉️

Y/N: you’re too old to be using emojis

BO: fuck you

Y/N: 😏

BO: pls🧍🏼‍♂️

You giggle to yourself while reading the last message. It wasn’t uncommon for you and Bo to be texting each other when one of you is horny or just bored, but it’s always been funny to you.

Before you knew it, it was 10 and you received two more chimes a few minutes apart from each other from your phone.

BO: Y/N?

BO: hey listen, there’s no pressure to come over btw. at any point we can stop, i just want to make sure ur comfortable and please don’t feel obligated to come over or send anything you don’t want to. just cuz i want things doesn’t mean i should get them and it’s sometimes confusing because i think you enjoy it when i beg and express how much i want you. but i don’t ever want it to turn into you feeling pressured into doing something you don’t want or feeling like your disappointing me. this is meant to be fun and if at any point it’s not fun for you we can stop and i’m sorry if me saying this is killing the mood, i just feel like it seems like i’m pressuring you

You were shocked by the long message of consent Bo just sent you. You guys only started seeing each other a few weeks ago and every single time you would do things he would always ask before kissing you. You then smiled and typed in your message back.

Y/N: omg im abt to be otw… wait for me

Y/N: i definitely enjoy when you beg for me btw

Around 10:30, you had finally arrived to Bo’s neutral toned house. You knocked on the beige door and Bo pulls the door open, dragging you in by your wrist.

“Hi..” He whispered in your ear, before sloppily kissing down your neck.

“Hi Bo,” you state. Laughing at his greedy actions, “How are you feeling tonight?”

He laughs with you. Laying his head on your shoulder, placing his hands on your hips and moving them up and down your sides. “Is it okay if I kiss you?” Bo asks.

You scoff and nod your head. Bo places a hand on the center of your back, leaning in and pulling you into a deep kiss passionately.

———————————————————————

i think i have to write a part two later but here, take this 😸🤲🏻

[bittersweetmorality]

heyyyyyy uhhhhh could i get like a sub hawks fic pretty please 🙏

literally kisses u . thank u . i have been waiting for a req like this thank u bae <3333 i have been very h word for hawks </3 thank u for letting me be self indulgent

it is a little rushed towards the end i am so sorry pls forgive me anon </3

shift in dynamic (sub!hawks x fem!bodied reader)

☾ genre: smut, 18+

☾ pairing: hawks x fem!bodied reader (no pronouns explicitly specified, but hawks calls reader “mommy”)

☾ warnings: *INHAAALE* PWP, sub!hawks (obviously), oral (f!receiving), dirty talk (m!receiving), praise..... so much praise, edging, PEGHAWKS2021‼️ (pegging), slight overstim????, a leetol bit of aftercare, kind of self indulgent idk i love he </3, (HARDLY EDITED)

☾ w/c: 3k !!

you don’t know how long you’ve been teasing him, been letting yourself get into innocent but compromising positions with him.

bending over to pick up a “dropped” pen in that skirt he oh so loved to see you in, going to “change” only to come back out with your outfit being no different whatsoever except with the new addition of his favorite thigh-highs of yours.

he was so sick of your teasing, and honestly? you lost track of time from how long you had it going on.

“angel... you’re hardly being subtle, you know~” he mused from his position on the bed.

you turn and smirk at him from the doorway, “who said i was trying to be subtle in the slightest?”

you slowly began making your way to him, watching closely at the way he drank in your figure. his eyes darted back and forth from your thigh-high clad legs, to the exposed section just under your skirt, to your breasts that were straining against the provocative, tight shirt you decided to wear this evening.

you wanted to give him everything he ever dreamed of right now, to utterly indulge him-- make him believe he would be in control.

letting him sit up for you to straddle his lap, letting him dominate your kisses. anything he initiated, you complied with. his hands began softly grazing your exposed thighs, trailing upwards-- higher and higher-- you purposely let out soft whimper.

you felt a smirk tug at the corners of his lips, “hm...? you like that, angel?” you felt his hot breath in your mouth.

“yes... oh yes... please kei...” your pleas a mere whisper, “please fuck me...”

he groaned deeply in response, diving back in to taste your lips again— a hungry clash of teeth and tongue from his impatience. you could feel his arousal despite the confines of his clothes already, him grinding against your hips with no shame.

oh, you loved riling him up, especially like this. getting him to get all hot and bothered, going this far to give him a sense that he’ll be in control...

only for you to shatter your façade instantaneously, pushing him down by his shoulders and pinning his roaming hands above his head-- trapping his legs in between yours and looking down at him triumphantly.

“angel?” he sputtered, looking up at you with wide eyes, “w-what’s with the quick shift, huh?” he quickly attempted to play it off as if he still had a grip on his bearings.

a smirk splayed your features in response. you said nothing, but let your gaze flicker back and forth from his swollen lips to his dark eyes.

“w-weren’t you just begging me to fuck you a minute ago, hm?~” he said.

even when he was rendered completely immobile by you, of course he was going to give you his sly tone, his shit-eating grin as he “tried” to keep control of the situation.

oh, but you knew why he did that.

just ‘cause he knew that it would rile you up...

just ‘cause he knew that it would make you have your way with him.

“oh, i was begging you to fuck me? really...” you trailed off, moving your gaze downward, and cupping his bulge harshly with no warning. he hissed in response, sucking his bottom lip in between his teeth, “sweetheart... i assure you, i’m not going to be the one who’s begging tonight.”

“y-yeah right,” he chuckled, “like i’ll believe that. just give it a few minutes, darling. you’ll realize that-- a-ah...”

you cut him off by moving your palm against him, harshly rubbing against his growing erection with no build up. the friction of your hand mixed with the rough material of his jeans sent an immense amount of stimulation right off the bat, catching him completely off guard.

“hm? speak up honey, i can’t hear you,” you leaned down and softly nibbled his ear as you whisper against him.

“f-fuck...” his eyes are now screwed shut as he revels in the friction you’re providing him, your speed ever increasing to render him unable to utter a word.

“oh, well that’s not what you said before, now is it?” you began littering kisses on his jaw, his neck, collarbone... biting occasionally, because you knew just how much he wanted to be marked by you.

you continued to rub him, keigo’s moans getting louder and higher in pitch. he was close.

already.

you giggled against him, the vibrations reverberating against his skin, “oh, you were also so sensitive, right kei? are you gonna cum?”

“y-yes...” he said, utterly breathless.

“do you wanna cum?”

he shook his head fervently.

“baby... use your words...” you gently remind.

“... no. please, not now...”

“mmm... good boy~”

his whines picked up at the pet name, his jean-clad hips beginning to grind against your palm.

you quickly ripped your hand away with a scoff, and keigo let out needy whine, the sound sending a shockwave straight to your cunt.

god, you’ve always loved his voice.

“ah-ah~” you tut, “didn’t you say you didn’t want to cum now, baby boy? do you really want to cum in your jeans like a teenage virgin?”

he shakily exhaled, “... n-no...”

“good. you’ll get what you want, i promise baby. just be patient, yeah?”

he nodded, looking up at you with tear-stained eyelashes. you took this opportunity to look him directly in the eyes while slowly lifting up your shirt to catch the hem between your teeth. he took a sharp inhale at the sight of exposed chest. you decided you would pass on wearing a bra this evening.

good choice.

“mm... kei...” you mumble breathily, snaking your arm down your torso, moving closer and closer to the hem of your panties.

“y-yes, angel?”

you shoot him a glance, taking your shirt out from between your teeth to be able to speak clearly.

“what was that?” your tone was sharp as you addressed him, leaning in close, “what’s my name?”

“m-mommy...”

“there we go, baby boy... that’s right...” your hand trails its way down once again, and you making a show of throwing your head back and sighing as it makes its descent. you begin stroking the outside of your panties, feeling the wet patch that has already seeped through the lacy material.

"kei... baby... already so wet for you..." you sigh, "now enjoy the show, yeah? don't move, baby boy... unless you-- mmm~" you couldn't help but let out a moan, your finger flicking a particularly sensitive spot on your clit as it moved in tight circles on the bud, "unless you don't want your reward..."

you spread your legs out further in your straddling position, giving him a perfect view of your panty-clad cunt. his erection was definitely painfully hard, you thought. no-- it didn't even have to be up to your imagination. you felt his cock strain against your inner thigh, letting out a soft moan at the thought.

you moved your panties to the side to dip a single finger in, sighing at the new feeling and rocking your hips. you opened your eyes to see keigo's reaction to you fucking your fingers-- right on top of him. you could feel his heartbeat from where you were seating atop him as well as his erratic breathing.

slipping your finger in and out of your cunt with ease, you decide to add a second one, beginning to scissor them both to stretch yourself out.

keigo was doing exactly as told-- following directions. only enjoying the show instead of doing anything without permission.

"m-mommy..." he squeaked out.

"yes, baby boy?"

"please... sit on my face. please, i wanna make you feel good, mommy..." his pleas were fucking adorable.

"you want me to fuck your face, sweetheart?" you muse.

"y-yes... please... please..."

"only because you asked so nicely, baby... such a good boy~"

he moans as you shift your position to finally take off your panties and throw them aside unceremoniously. you place your thighs on either side of his head, trapping his head between them and immediately feeling his hot panting breath hit your core.

“keigo, honey... you know what to say if you want to stop, right?” you look into his eyes, patiently awaiting his answer before moving forward at all.

“yes... red.” his big hands squeezed the fat of your thighs, just below your ass as he replied.

“mm... good boy~” you sigh once again, finally sinking yourself down to meet his lips. immediately, his tongue poked out and lapped at the wetness already dripping out from your cunt. he moaned against you, the vibrations sending a wave of pleasure up your spine. god, it was almost like he was enjoyed having you sit on his face more than you.

almost.

you grabbed a fistful of his hair as your body fell forward from pleasure. you always knew he enjoyed having his hair tugged, but you held off on letting him have that pleasure at the moment. until he took your clit in his mouth and sucked, kneading your ass as he held you in place.

and high pitched moan was ripped from your throat, and your fingers tensing into a fist on reflex, pulling at keigo’s hair harshly. the whimper that escaped him was heavenly, his motions becoming more frantic, more needy as he ate you out. he wanted to please you.

he wanted to please you so, so bad.

you felt the coil in your stomach begin to build up, the tension making your mind hazy as the room filled with only your moans and the sounds of keigo’s sinful ministrations against your core. all of his movements now harsh, and a steady transition of his tongue lapping at your clit, and his lips sucking more and more as he knew you were close.

“f-fuck, kei... fuck... a-ah... i’m- i’m gonna cum...” you all but whisper, your voice failing you.

“cum, mommy. please. please cum for me...” he mumbled against you, giving one particularly harsh suck and before you could even process his words, you were thrown over the edge.

your vision went white as your orgasm washed over you in an impeding wave, keigo not giving you enough warning before making you cum with so much force.

“mommy?” his voice snapped you back to reality as you began to come down from your high, “are you okay? w-was i good?”

you shifted from your position to lie next to him on the mattress, looking into his eyes with nothing but pure sincerity as you replied, “baby... yes... oh my god, yes. you were so, so good...” you stroked his cheek warmly with the back of your hand, feeling your heart flutter when he leaned into your touch.

“now, i just have to return the favor now, hm? you were such a good boy for mommy, now it’s mommy’s turn to make you feel good,” you whisper in his ear, nipping at it once before unbuttoning his jeans and sliding them off with ease. you were impatient, and so was he.

“tell me what you want, baby. use your words,” you instructed, stroking his cock with one finger through his boxers.

he squeaked, quickly shying away at your instructions, clearly embarrassed at what he wanted to ask of you.

“sweetheart, look at me,” you held his cheeks with your free hand to direct his gaze back to you, “tell me, i want to make you feel good, yeah?”

he bit his bottom lip.

“...p-please fuck me,” he pleaded almost inaudibly. he doubt you even heard it, and like hell he would be able to muster enough courage to say it again.

thankfully, you heard it. loud and clear.

“you want mommy to fuck your ass, baby? is that what you want?”

“...yes, please...” his cheeks burned at your lewd words. he hadn’t expected you to say it so bluntly, but it was exactly what he wanted.

you leaned down to catch his lips in a passionate kiss, one hand holding the nape of his neck while the other held his waist to draw him as near to you as possible. you wanted the kiss to show him exact how much you loved him-- how you only wanted to make him happy.

“you know exactly how to ask. my good boy~”

you reached over into your nightstand drawer, pulling out purple strap-on and lube, fixing the harness around your waist, and pulling off his briefs completely. you lubed up your fingers, rubbing them against the digits from your other hand to warm it up. you positioned yourself in between his thighs, pulling them apart to give you easy access.

“you okay, kei?” you ask.

“yes, yes... i am...” he responded, looking up at you then to your fingers, his gaze clearly impatient.

you chuckled, bringing your index finger to circle his hole gently, lubing up everything as much as possible before pushing it in, little by little.

by no means was this keigo’s first time experiencing something like this with you, however, any experience that caused him discomfort or pain was lost. you made a constant, extra effort to make sure everything was perfect for him.

when your finger entered him completely, you slowly pumped it in and out, feeling him relax around you as you continued.

“feeling okay?”

“y-yes... you can... add another,” he said.

at his word, you added your middle finger, beginning to scissor them inside him to prep him for what was to come. his gasps slowly began to turn into breathy moans at the sensation, and when you curled your fingers upward to hit his prostate, he whimpered beneath you, hips bucking up to meet your fingers. you held him down with your free hand, making sure you still had complete control.

“third?” you ask.

“yes...”

you quickly comply, adding a third and following the routine you set for the previous digits. pumping in and out, curling them at that spot that always had him uncontrollably whining from pleasure.

you continue scissoring your fingers until you believed he was prepped enough, beginning to lube up the strap that’s been settled on your hips while looking for keigo’s approval once again, “are you ready, baby?”

he nods, a faint “yes...” passing from his lips.

slowly, you push in the silicone cock inside, inch-by-inch and watching his body language with a sharp gaze. he was doing so, so well you thought, the dildo going inside with ease.

“it’s in, baby... all the way... good?” you ask once again.

“good... so good...”

you smile, experimentally letting your hips draw back and slam back into his once. the way his voice cracked, his hands looked for leverage wherever they could find it to control the amount of stimulation he felt...

you swear you were getting drunk off of him.

you begin to set a slowly, languid pace, grinding your hips into his. he bit his bottom lip, “f-faster... please... i promise i can take it...”

you wordlessly comply, placing your hands on either side of his head to get a better angle, and began slamming your hips against him erratically. his desperate moans and whines quickly picking up pace and pitch, and you vaguely pick up mumblings of “so good...”, “oh my god...”, and “so close...”

he looks down at you with a hazy expression. his cock now swollen and leaking from penetrative stimulation, but it was clearly not enough. the way he crooned and leaned into your touch every time you pulled your hips away from him-- oh, you could tell it was just painful for him.

you lightly wrapped your fingers around his cock, your hand not moving, but your cock driving into him even faster-- just to see how he would react. he hissed at the contact, thrusting his hips to create his own stimulation. you didn’t stop him, seeing how close he could make himself to cumming just by fucking your fist. he was so loud, loud moans bouncing off the walls only to be broken by his voice cracking.

“you close, baby?” you coo.

“m-mhm... oh my god.... so close...” his hips picked up speed, the sound of skin slapping against skin almost as loud as his noises now.

“cum baby, you deserve it, yeah? such a good boy...” you pet his hair as you encouraged him, moving your hand and hips to meet his thrusts to make him tip over the edge faster, reveling in the way his eyes screwed shut and his knuckles turned white from gripping the sheets beneath him.

he came with a choked moan, shaking violently as you continued to pump him as felt heavy ropes of cum glide down your hand, his stomach...

you kissed the tip, open-mouthed and wet to make him twitch again under your touch.

“how are you feeling, kei?” you whisper, petting his soft hair as you patiently, carefully slipping out of him. you untie the harness around your waist, setting it on your side table once again and lying beside him.

you waited for his heaving chest to relax and his eyes to flutter open again.

“great... fucking amazing...” he smiled at you, his breath heavy as he panted between his words.

“let me get you cleaned up, yeah? you did so good for me...” you kissed his temple, letting your lips linger on his flushed skin for a bit longer. you pulled away after several seconds, looking deep into his eyes, “i love you, keigo,”

his palm rested on your cheek as he looked back at you, “i love you more,”

he said your name with nothing but love, admiration and pure joy.

you truly were the light of his life.

[mochegato]

If Love is Pain, Let’s Hurt Tonight

“Here's to the painful, miserable, pointless, painful experience that is love,” Marinette held up her shot glass waiting for Roy to join.  

Roy didn’t keep her waiting long.  He raised his glass to match hers, letting out a grunt of agreement before slamming back the drink.  He set the glass back down and studied her for a moment.  She didn’t seem sad anymore, which was good.  He didn’t want to have to console a sad Marinette, and honestly that guy wasn’t worth her tears.  Instead, she seemed resigned after her break up, more lonely than missing him.

Roy knew what had happened as soon as she showed up at his door with a bottle of liquor and a broken smile.  He let her in so she had a supportive place to get over it, better here with him than alone at a bar somewhere, but he wouldn’t lie and say he wasn’t glad they finally broke up.  That asshole wasn’t good enough for her.  What the hell was a stock broker anyway?  Made up, bullshit job.  He never realized the gift he had in her.

Roy wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.  “You said painful twice.”

“I didn’t say it enough,” she looked at him pointedly and poured another shot for them both.  “Here's to crappy dates and worse relationships.”  She raised her glass again.  He nodded and matched her, raising his shot before drinking.

He filled their glasses again and raised his glass this time.  “Here’s to loveless loved ones that make you feel unworthy and unlovable.”

“Heyyyyyy,” she brightened at his participation and raised her glass in agreement and drank.  She filled their glasses again before raising hers.  “Here’s to looking for love in all the wrong places and not finding it where you want it.”

Roy eyed her wryly and raised his glass to drink. He knew all about not finding love where you wanted to find it.  He looked away from her to fill the glasses again, trying to remember if he had restocked his liquor supply recently because they were going through this bottle awfully quickly.  “Here’s to falling in love with villains,” he offered raising his glass.  He may have gotten Lian out of it, but that was the only good thing about that relationship.

He raised the drink to his lips but stopped, noticing that Marinette didn’t do the same.  He raised an eyebrow at her lack of participation.  She had an adorable pout as she contemplated her drink.  “I can’t drink.  I never dated a villain.”

“Villains and assholes,” he corrected, leaning toward her and holding his drink toward her conspiratorially.

Marinette immediately brightened and raised her glass, clinking it against his.  “That I’ve done.”  She downed the shot quickly and winced at the burn down her throat. “Almost exclusively lately.”

Roy poured another shot for her and turned on the television to hopefully distract her from getting too bad of a hangover tomorrow.  The move had questionable success.  The drinking slowed, but didn’t stop.  Instead the distraction seemed to give her more time to think.  Her previously jovial mood had become much more contemplative and quiet.  Finally, after a few more slow shots she over up at him, an introspective frown pulling the corners of her lips down.  “Is it me?”

Roy whipped his head back to her as though he hadn’t been studying her in his peripheral vision the entire time anyway. “What?”

“Is it me,” she repeated, staring at the coffee table. “Am I the problem?  Is that why I can’t find a good relationship?”  She gasped as a sudden realization hit her and turned to him.  “Am I a bad kisser?”

She looked at him desperately causing him to freeze.  He would give just about anything to be able to answer that question, but their relationship had never been like that, no matter how much he would like it to be. He turned away and focused on his drink instead.  “I wouldn’t know,” he muttered.

“Kiss me!” She sat up straight on the couch and turned so her entire body faced him, an excited look on her face.

“What?”

“Kiss me.  Tell me honestly if I’m a bad kisser.”  Roy stared at her, mouth hanging open for a few seconds. Marinette’s face slowly morphed from excited to horrified to sad.  “Never mind. You don’t want to do that.  That was a stupid id…”

Roy launched at her before she could finish the sentence, crashing his lips into hers.  If this was the only chance he was going to have to kiss her, he was going to make it worth it.  He worked his hand behind her head, pulling her close.  His other hand cupped her face as his lips slid against hers.  She whimpered into his lips and ran her tongue along his lower lip.  He gladly granted her access and moved his head to deepen the kiss.  She melted into him and wound her hands around his shoulders to pull him closer then moved them to cradle his face.

They finally pulled apart after a few minutes, gasping for breath.  When her breath had evened out she looked up at him questioningly.  “Well?” she quietly breathed out.  

He stared at her still too dazed to form words. He blinked a few times still trying to process her words.  “Huh?”

She backed away from him as far as the couch would allow and looked down sadly.  “Was it that bad?”

He blinked a few more times.  The words still weren’t registering.  That was one of, if not the best kiss he’d ever had and his heart still hadn’t returned to its regular rhythm.  He looked away as he remembered.  That’s right. This didn’t mean anything to her. It wasn’t about him.  She didn’t love him.  This was about helping her figure out how to keep someone she did love. He shook his head to try to focus on her question.  “It was…” he turned to his drink and filled it again.  “It’s not your kissing,” he reassured her bitterly.

Marinette sat back proudly and filled her glass for a celebratory drink.  “Thanks. You’re really good too.  I mean you didn’t say I was really good, but you are.”

He flushed red and kept his focus on the drink and the television.  This wasn’t about him.  This was about her, helping her get over her latest loser and ready to find the next one.

Marinette watched the television with him for another little while, her proud smile slowly morphing into a contemplative frown. “So it’s just me then.  My personality that drives them away.”

Roy sighed and cursed his luck to be the one she came to tonight.  Why did it have to be him?  Why did he have to be the one she came to so she could recover and get back out into the field and date yet another asshole who didn’t appreciate her?  “Maybe it’s just like you said.  You’re looking in the wrong places.”

“Where should I look instead?” she asked with such earnestness in her eyes it hurt him not to answer her.

“How about right fucking next to you,” he grumbled under his breath, not trying to be heard.

She looked on either side of her and frowned, her brow creasing in melancholy.  “It’s empty.” She looked up at him with glassy eyes. “You think I should be alone?”

“What?” he exclaimed.  That was most definitely not what he had meant.  How is that even what she got out of that?  “No!  No, I… I meant… never mind.”  He gave an exasperated sigh and took another drink.

She watched him for a few moments like she was contemplating him or his words.  She suddenly gasped again and shot forward, her eyes huge.  “What if I’m bad at sex?”  Roy stopped breathing and kept his eyes decidedly focused on the television.  He clamped his mouth shut to keep himself from repeating the refrain that kept running through his head.  Please ask my opinion.  Please ask my opinion.  Please ask my opinion.

Just as quickly as she shot forward, she slumped back against the cushions.  “No, most of my relationships never got that far.  That couldn’t be it.”

Roy huffed out an annoyed breath.  “Of fucking course we don’t need to test that one. Fucking annoying,” he muttered under his breath, taking another drink and quickly filling his glass for another.

“What?” she cocked her head to the side in confusion.

“I said you’re annoying,” Roy shot back without thinking, downing the other shot.

Marinette looked away and chuckled bitterly. “Well, that answers the personality question, I guess.”  She took another shot and leaned back against the couch to focus on the television. “Don’t annoying people deserve love too? I just want to fall in love and have them love me back.  Is that too much to ask?”

Roy winced at her tone.  He hadn’t meant to say she was annoying.  Not really.  He just needed something to say as cover for what he actually did say.  It was something he would say normally and she’d laugh, tell him to fuck off.  But now, she was not in the mood and he should have known that.  He watched her as she pretended to focus on the television, wanting desperately to be able to run his fingers over the creases in her brow to smooth them out, to ease her pain, make her smile.  “No,” he answered quietly, “it isn’t too much.  You deserve it.”

She looked over at him and quickly looked down shyly.  “Thank you. So do you.”

He scoffed and poured himself another drink. “We both know that’s not true.”

“Hey,” she reached out to stop his arm from lifting his drink to his lips.  “It absolutely is.  You deserve so much and you don’t even see it.”  She lowered her hand and shook her head.  “You’re an idiot.”

He let out a bitter laugh and downed the shot. “Thanks.  I know.”

“Because you don’t realize how amazing you are,” she continued.  “You’re creative and loyal and smart, God so smart, and brave and kind and hot and sweet and…”she stopped herself and suddenly backed away again, pouring herself another shot.  “I hate love.” She downed the shot, refusing to look in his direction.  “It only causes pain.”

He blinked at her a few times.  Had she meant that about him?  And why did she transition from talking about him to taking about love?  “Marinette?”

“Yes?”

She looked at him with her big, beautiful, blue eyes.  He could almost fool himself into believing he saw adoration in her eyes.  “How drunk are you?”

She scoffed at him this time.  “Not enough.  Still capable of rational, lucid decision making.  Clearly, need more liquor so I don’t have to think anymore, can’t remember anymore.”  

He watched her avoid his eyes, pretending like she was okay.  And she was pretending.  He was the world’s foremost expert on pretending.  He knew the signs.  “Mari, those people are idiots to not want to be with you, to not want to spend as much time as possible with you, for not realizing how incredible you are.”

“But… you said I was annoying,” she said quietly. She looked up at him with uncertainty and vulnerability radiating from her.  He couldn’t let that continue.

“Marinette,” he started, taking a deep breath to prepare himself for ruining their friendship.  He moved so he was kneeling on the floor in front of her.  “You are annoying.  Your smile is annoying because it’s so bright and blinding.  Your laugh is annoying because it's light and bright and makes the entire mood lighter.  Your huge heart is annoying because it puts you and your heart in danger ALL the time. Your eyes are annoying because they’re clear and kind and make the people seeing them feel hopeful.  Your lips are annoying because they’re plump and soft looking.  Your kiss is annoying because it was warm and mind-blowing.  It’s all annoying because it isn’t meant for me.  That’s what makes it annoying.”  He cradled her head in his hands and gently ran his thumbs over her cheeks.  He furrowed his brow and gave her a desperate look.  “Can we play pretend for tonight?  Pretend we love each other?  Make each other’s pain go away for a night.”

“I don’t want to pretend,” she whispered, moving closer to him until her breath was fanning out over his face.

He shook his head and angled his head to a better position.  “I don’t have to.”  His voice had turned husky and barely audible.

“Neither do I.”  She pushed the last few centimeters to close the gap between them and capture his lips with her own.

<><><><><> 

Roy moaned as the light hit his eyes.  Usually the light didn’t get him unless he’d slept into the late, late morning. He turned over, trying to find respite from the light.  He moved slowly so he wouldn’t wake up Marinette.  His eyes flew open and he shot up.  Marinette! That’s why he had slept late enough for the light to hit him.  He and Marinette had kept each other awake until the early morning.

He looked over to the other side of the bed to see how she felt now that the alcohol had worn off.  The bed was empty.  They’d fallen asleep with his arms around her and her nuzzling into his chest.  But Marinette was gone.  He groaned and collapsed back onto the bed.  He ran his hand over his face and into his hair. She left.  Shit he ruined everything.  She woke up, realized how much of a fuck up he is, and got the fuck out as quickly as she could.

He never should have let them sleep together last night, let alone repeatedly. She wasn’t in her right mind.  He hadn’t been either, but he should have waited and now he’d ruined their friendship.  He jumped at his phone when it started ringing.  Maybe she was calling.  That was perfect.  They could talk about this and figure out where they were, hopefully, if he begged and promised never to look at her again, they could get back to friends.

He almost threw the phone when he saw it was Jason.  “What do you want?” he demanded rougher than Jason deserved. But then again, he had almost definitely done something at some point to deserve it.

“Where are you?” Jason demanded back, rougher than Roy had been.

“In my apartment.  Where are you?” Roy asked petulantly.

“In the garage where you’re supposed to be, asshole,” Jason answered shortly.

Fuck! Roy looked at the clock.  It was after ten.  He was supposed to meet Jason to work on his bike.  He groaned.  This day just kept getting better and fucking better.  He sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed, leaning his elbows on his knees to cradle his head.  “Sorry.  I’m not making it today.”

“What the fuck, jackass?  What am I supposed to do about my bike?” Jason yelled.

Roy sighed and ran his hand over his face again.  Jason needed his bike for a job.  He didn’t have time to wait for Roy to get his act together.  “Sorry.  I… yeah, fine.  I’ll get there in a little bit.”

“Hurry the fuck up,” Jason growled at him.

“Yeah, okay,” Roy answered quietly.

The line went silent for a few moments.  Roy almost tossed his phone at the call ending but Jason finally spoke up again.  “What’s with you?”

“Nothing.  I’ll get there when I get there,” Roy promised already starting to get up.

“Bullshit.  You’re acting funny.  What happened?”

Roy fell back to sit on the edge of the bed again.  “I… I fucked up.”

“What’s fucking new?” Jason scoffed.

Roy shook his head and looked longingly at the wall.  If he was closer, he could hit his head into it a few times, really drive the pain home.  “I really fucked up this time.”

“Okay…” Jason prompted him.

“I slept with Marinette last night,” Roy groaned out.

“Fucking finally!” Jason cheered.  “Fine, you two… wait, what do you mean fucked up?  What did you do?”

“I told you I slept with her.  I… we were drunk.  I shouldn’t have slept with her.  Fuck. I ruined everything.  She’s going to hate me.”

“Pixie’s not going to hate you.  What did she say this morning?”

“She left before I woke up.”  He chuckled bitterly.  “She always was the smart one.  Got out as quickly as she could.”

“Okay, grab something to eat, take a shower, get here when you get here.  I’ve got to make a call.”  The line cut off quickly.

Roy pulled on some underwear and pajama bottoms and tucked his phone into the pocket.  He made his way to the kitchen to start coffee.  Today was definitely a multiple cups of coffee day.  He was going to need lots of coffee to deal with this day.  Maybe he could take a few extra thermoses of coffee with him to the garage.  He just got to the kitchen when his phone started ringing again.  His brow furrowed in confusion when he looked at his phone and realized his screen was still black.  He jumped back when he heard a groan from the couch.

“What do you want, Jay?” Marinette croaked out sleepily.  She sat up slowly, rubbing her hand over her face.  “Why do you want to know where…” she paused to let him speak.  Her eyes widened in surprise.  “How did you…”  She looked around her and squeaked when she saw Roy staring at her, frozen in uncertainty. She gave Roy a timid wave and an awkward smile.  “No I’m… I… uh… still here.  I just moved to the couch.”

She turned away quickly and hunched over her phone.  “I will,” she tried to whisper into the phone.  She sighed and rubbed her forehead.  “We both know you’re not going to kick my ass…” she sat straight up suddenly and glanced back at Roy for a second before turning away again.  “Yes, yes.  Fine.  I got it. Just stop threatening him,” she whisper shouted into the phone.  “I’ll tell him…” she paused again.  “I don’t know if there’s anything to congr…” she stopped when he cut her off.  “I’ll try not to.  Thanks, Jay.”  

She ended the call and took a deep breath before standing to face Roy.  “Hi,” she said shyly, waving at him again, slowly making her way around the couch to the same side as him.  “Jay said not to worry about the garage?”

“You’re still here,” he observed breathlessly, ignoring Jason’s message.

“I… You mentioned a while ago that Lian sometimes still crawls into bed with you in the mornings.  We hadn’t discussed what this,” she motioned between them, “meant and I didn’t want her to find me there if this wasn’t going anywhere.”  She looked away and hugged her arms around herself.  “Sorry, I should have left but I didn’t want to call someone to pick me up and have to talk about it with them and I wasn’t in any condition to make it home on my own and cabs in this town, you know, it’s hit or miss.”

“No, I’m glad you stayed.  I thought…” he paused, cutting himself off and felt his lips spread into a goofy smile. “You stayed.”

“I stayed,” she confirmed with a tentative smile.  Her eyes darted behind him and returned to him, her face becoming serious.  “I can go now though, before she wakes up.  I’m sober enough now.”

He shook his head as he walked over to her, stopping just in front of her close enough for him to reach over and touch her, but he restrained himself.  He wasn’t sure how she felt about last night and he didn’t want to presume.  “Lian isn’t here.  Remember? She was with Oliver and Dinah yesterday and I’m picking her up at dinner tonight.”

“Oh… right… that”s… yeah, you told me that.  Drunk me didn’t remember that,” she hit her hand on her head and gave him a sheepish smile.

He chuckled and started to reach out toward her but pulled his hand back just before it touched her as he realized what might be causing her resistance.  “Unless you were looking for an excuse to get away. We can pretend she’ll be coming out any second,” he offered quietly.

Marinette shook her head slowly, keeping her eyes on Roy.  “I’m not.  I just didn’t want to confuse or upset Lian.”

Roy chuckled and leaned against the back of the couch close to Marinette.  “Finding you in our apartment or even in my bed wouldn’t upset Lian.  She loves you.  She asks for you to stay over all the time.  The only thing that might upset her is that you’re sleeping in my bed and not having a sleepover with her.”

Marinette gave him a relieved smile and leaned against the couch too.  “I guess I can schedule some sleepovers with her. We can have some girl time.”

“And what about me?” Roy asked hopefully.

“Do you want me to have sleepovers with you too?” She asked uncertainly, like she was looking for confirmation that it was something he would be okay with, let alone want.  As though he would ever say no to her.  Like he was more worthy than her.  

He mentally scoffed at the very idea.  She was the prize.  She was the amazing one.  She always had been.  She was a goddess and he was just him.  A screw up who tried his hardest and still screwed up everything he touched.  He kept falling, kept failing and Marinette shined. She didn’t even have to work at it but she still did.  God, he loved her.  And she was staring at him like he was deserving and he really wanted to be.

He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her between his legs.  “God, please yes.”  She let out a shuddering, relieved breath and melted into his embrace, hugging him back tightly.  She pulled away just enough to look up at him with a loving smile.  He cupped her face with his hand and looked over her face studying it in awe until he bent down to kiss her slowly.  He pulled away too soon for Marinette’s liking.  “I just wanted to do that sober.”

“As good as you remember?” she asked with a hopeful smile.

“Better,” he smiled back at her and brushed her bangs away from her face, returning his hand to cup her jaw.  “I’ve wanted to do that since I met you.”

She laid her hand on top of his.  Her eyes shined up at him.  “I’ve been waiting for you to.”  She wound her other hand behind his neck and pulled him down to her lips, capturing them in a passionate, desperate kiss.  His arm tightened against her waist, pulling her closer and holding her flush against him with one hand.  His other hand ghosted over her neck and down her side and back up again, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake.  Her fingers moved to trace the lines of his muscles on his abdomen, chest, and arms.

She whined as he pulled away from her, but squeaked when he picked her up by her thighs to straddle him, walking them back toward the bedroom.  “Let’s start that sleepover now,” he whispered huskily against her lips.  She giggled and pulled herself up to kiss up his neck and nibble on his ear as he struggled to focus on making it to the bed without falling.

 Tags:

@boldlyanxious

[writer-k-pop]

Lil’ Drunk

기억나? Do you remember it?

Description: Alcohol is something you never touch, it's just not your cup of tea. But one night, you decide to throw caution to the wind because you were feeling guilty for being the only sober one whenever Woozi and his friends drink together. But after you drink a little too much, Woozi is called in to get you home safely. Warnings: Swearing Genre: Angst, Fluff, BF!Woozi x Fem!Reader Word Count: 2.4k

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"She's...." Woozi's voice trails off on the other end of the line.

"Drunk." (y/f/n) finishes, holding your phone up to her ear.

"How? She never drinks." He wonders incredulously but at the same time is scrambling to collect his things.

(y/f/n) shrugs, "Well, she did tonight. And she drank a lot."

"Is she gonna get sick on the way home?" Woozi wonders, slightly worried about how he's going to get you home.

"I don't think so. She's just very, mm, very emotional." (y/f/n) says glancing over as you have your head buried in your hands. Not tears yet, just massive amounts of guilt.

Woozi sighs more out of worry than anything. Worry because you really never drink. Partly because you're a lightweight and partly because you hate, absolutely despise, the way alcohol makes your body feel. Gets you all red and itchy and it's not a fun time for you.

"I'll be right over. Could you text me your address?" Woozi asks, slipping on his jacket.

"Yeah, no problem." (y/f/n) says and hangs up before texting Woozi her address. Then she places your phone back into your purse.

Your hands drop from your face then and you continue your previous rant, cheeks are still bright red as is the little amount of chest showing. And from the last bathroom trip, everyone knows your thighs are also cherry red.

"I just, I just feel so so so bad." You lull your head to the side. "Like I know it's not my fault for not enjoying alcohol or the taste or how it makes my body feel but I feel so bad when all his friends are drinking and I'm the only sober one."

"Who wants to play another game?" Another one of your friends asks, trying to break the odd tension you've created. But the question only springs another tangent from you.

"And games!" You throw your hands into the air, "When we play games and it involves drinking I try not play because half of the time Woozi has to drink for me! Why am I always the sober one?" You lean in close to the person next to you to emphasize your question.

"Because you have your reasons." She answers your question with a humored smile. She's clearly enjoying your drunken state as are the others along with a little worry cause they've never seen you drunk or drinking before.

"My reasons make me feel guilty." You pout like a child. "I'm starting to wonder if I should drink more and force myself to get better with it all."

"No, no, no." (y/f/n) quickly shakes her hands in front of her, "That's probably not a good idea. Remember the last time you tried that?"

"When did I ever do that?" You ask, blinking blankly at her.

"Before you finally gave up on alcohol the first time." She reminds you and the memory resurfaces like a bad nightmare.

You visibly shiver and suddenly have a craving for water. "Pass me the water bottle?" You reach out a hand and one of your friends places it in your hand. "I still feel guilty as hell though." You mention after taking a couple sips.

Before you could spiral back into the guilt ridden speech, Woozi knocks on the front door.

"Who's that?" You whip your head around as (y/f/n) goes to answer the door.

She opens the door and reveals Woozi to the room and to you. As soon as you see him, you press your lips together to keep from saying anything about your earlier rant.

"You ready to go?" Woozi asks you, walking closer with a warm smile on his face. If you were sober you would've noticed the tinge of worry in his eyes but you were drunk so that detail went way over your head.

Not wanting to break your newly found code of silence, you simply nod your head though questions are flying through you mind.

Why is he here?

Where am I ready to go?

Is he taking me?

Are we all going together?

(y/f/n) hands Woozi your purse as you stand and walk to his side. Then he wraps an arm around your waist and leads you out of (y/f/n)'s place. You stumble here and there but are pretty stable when walking which brings some relief to Woozi.

"Did you have fun?" He asks you while waving down a taxi.

Again, in your code of silence, you just nod while focusing on staying standing and not letting your butt meet the concrete sidewalk.

Within seconds, a taxi pulls up and Woozi ushers you into the back seat before joining you and telling the driver an address. You're not sure if it's your address or his. If it's his then you're going to be going to an apartment with twelve other guys who will definitely never let you live this down. But that thought hasn't hit you yet.

You let your head fall onto Woozi's shoulder during the car ride and he lazily intertwines your hands together.

"Are you feeling okay?" He asks you quietly and you just nod your head truthfully.

"How much did you drink?" He continues to question you but you only shrug, staying silent.

Woozi chuckles, "(y/f/n) said that you were being chatty and ranting about something. But now you're all quiet."

Again, you just give him a small shrug as an answer.

"Just tell me if you don't feel good, okay?" He asks, concern now seeping into his voice slightly but again, it goes right over your head.

You nod your head and feel your eyelids become heavy. Guess the adrenaline only lasts while your friends are there to keep fueling it.

By the time the taxi stops and Woozi pays, you're about ready to fall fast asleep.

"Just a bit longer, (y/n)." He says and tugs you out of the taxi before closing the door and wrapping his arm around you waist again.

"I really don't want the other guys to see me." You suddenly spit out and Woozi walk falters ever so slightly.

"I wouldn't bring you back to the dorm." He explains, "(y/f/n) lives closer to your place anyway."

You gasp, "You know (y/f/n)?" You ask, shocked in your drunken state.

"We've met a few times and she called me tonight to come and pick you up." He explains.

"Why would she call you?" You wonder, "I was fine. We were all fine."

Woozi sees the tiny opening in the conversation and dives straight for it, too curious to be stopped. "Well, she said you were getting emotional."

You place a hand over your chest, "I was? No, I wasn't. I was just explaining how I feel bad because my boyfriend and his friends like to drink but I always end up being the sober one. And then my one friend had to mention games and then it only reminded me how my boyfriend - his name's Woozi by the way - my boyfriend always has to drink for me if we play games and how terrible I feel about it because he has to drink twice as much." You inhale dramatically after rushing the last bit as your breath ran out with it.

Woozi stays silent and internalizes your words. In all honesty, your soberness never bothered him. He didn't mind drinking for you since he had a pretty good tolerance and drinking for you allowed him to get to an enjoyable buzz quicker than if he was drinking for just himself. And again because of his tolerance, he never minded that you were sober. He was always essentially sober when his friends drank so it was nice to have you around as another sober person. Plus he knew you detested the feeling you got when you drank so he respected that and never tried to get you to drink.

"Heyyyyyy." You point to your front door, "This is the same number as my place! Has your place always been the same number as mine?" You ask, turning towards him with wide curious eyes.

Quickly unlocking your front door, he chuckles, "No, this is your place." He says and opens the door before you go bounding inside.

"Woozi! Look!" You exclaim, gesturing to your couch, "It's my COUCH! I sat right here while you and all your friends drank that one time." You plop onto the couch and groan while squeezing your eyes shut, "And I was the only sober one that time too."  

Closing the front door, all Woozi can do is shake his head and chuckle at your current state.

-the next morning-

Rolling out of bed, a low throbbing in your head makes you groan. Stumbling towards the kitchen, your mind replays hazy dream like memories of you going over to (y/f/n)'s place, deciding to throw in the towel and drink, and drink some more, then Woozi showed up and brought you home where you think you screamed something about your couch before talking about being sober.

"You're awake." Woozi states the obvious as he stands next to the coffee maker, "I was just about to come and wake you up."

You give him a half smile, the most you can muster with your headache raging, "My head is killing me, do I have any painkillers or something?"

Woozi chuckles and points to the dining table where a large glass of water sits next to a napkin with two painkillers. "Way ahead of you. And drink the whole glass. It'll help."

You nod and pop the pills into your mouth before washing them down with the entire glass of water.

"Did I really drink that much last night?" You wonder and head into the kitchen to refill the glass.

"I don't really know how much you drank." Woozi admits while pouring out his coffee, "But yeah, I would guess it was a lot."

Leaning back against the counter, you let your head fall forward in dismay.

"Do you remember it?" Woozi asks, copying your position opposite of you.

You nod slowly, "It's foggy but I remember pretty much all of it, yeah."

"You want to talk about it?" He offers a small smile.

"Don't you have to get to work?" You wonder, looking over at the clock in concern.

Woozi shrugs his shoulders, "Work can wait for a little. Plus I don't technically have to be in for a few hours."

You sigh and purse your lips, "Why was I talking about being sober?" You ask, still curious as to why the word 'sober' kept appearing in your memories.

"Well, you kind of get emotional when your drunk, apparently. And last night, you kept ranting about how bad you felt that you are always the only one who's sober when we get together with my friends." Woozi fills you in and your face drops in embarrassment.

"Oh fuck me." You groan and rub your hands over your face. "Oh, god, that's, oh god."

Woozi walks up to you and pulls your hands away from your face, "You know it doesn't bother me right?"

Looking at him, you ask, "Being an emotional drunk or being the only one who doesn't drink?"

A light smile touches his lips before he answers, "Both. But I'm mostly talking about you being sober while my friends and I drink."

"Really?" You question him, "Are you sure it doesn't bother you?"

"Of course not." Woozi says, gripping your hands a little tighter.

"Even when they make you drink for me when we play games?" You ask, scrunching your lips together.

"Even when they make me drink for you." He repeats your words with a light tone, "It doesn't bother me in the slightest. In fact, sometimes I enjoy those times."

"You- why?" You stutter, curious.

"Because of my tolerance, on a normal night I can barely get a buzz enough to tolerate the others but on game nights, when I drink for you, I reach that comfortable buzz faster." He explains, "And then Dokyeom, Hoshi, and Dino become ten times funnier."

He chuckles and you try to control a smile by lowering your head down but a little giggle comes out anyway.

"But I already talked to the guys." Woozi continues which brings your head up to meet his gaze. "I asked them to quit it with the 'if you're playing a drinking game, you need to be drinking alcohol' rule. They said fine so when we play, you can sip whatever drink you want to."

"Why?" You ask, feeling gratitude to Woozi but also some confusion as to why he would do that.

"Cause I was starting to sense that it wasn't sitting right with you that I was drinking for you." He tells you, "Yes, I picked up on that. I'm your boyfriend, I could read you after like six months of dating."

"Damn, I guess I gotta get better at hiding my thoughts then." You joke and Woozi rolls his eyes.

"Good luck." He offers encouragement with a touch of sarcasm and you stick your tongue out at him.

But Woozi quickly wipes the scowl away with a soft kiss to your lips.

"Thank you for talking to the guys. You really didn't have to." You tell him with a grateful smile.

"I kind of had to. They really were being pushy with the whole thing." He says, matter-of-factly. "Hey, can I ask why you drank yesterday in the first place?" He wonders, wrapping your arms around his waist before placing his around your waist.

You shrug, "I guess I was kind of tired of being the sober one so I just grabbed a drink and drank it."

"But you hate how alcohol makes you feel." He reasons.

"I do. But I just was feeling so guilty about possibly being a downer cause I don't drink that I guess, I just didn't care last night." You explain and rest your head on his chest/shoulder. "And I don't think I'll do it again. I really hated the feeling. And my body got so red, I swear it looked like I was sunburnt."

"Ah, more like you had just belly flopped into a pool." Woozi corrects your simile and you shoot a look up at him.

"What?" He counters your look, "Someone had to get you into your pajamas and you were in no state to do it yourself."

You bury your face into his neck as a blush blooms on your cheeks.

Woozi laughs and hugs you closer, "It's okay, you were an adorable drunk. And by the way," He shuffles the two over to where you can see the living room and he points to the couch while laughing, "That is indeed your couch."

[pretendingboyfriends]

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A/N: heyyyyyy i know this took a long time to finish BUT shit happens and mental health comes before fanfiction. anyways, i hope u guys love this part and pls do not hesitate to send comments, suggestions, etc. when you’re finished and pls don’t forget to reblog!! also, thank u @sunflowers-styles​ and @fromyourstrulyh​ for beta-ing this part it would be a mess if u hadn’t <3

Warnings: angst, sadness, slightest bit of sexual tension, deidre being a bitch

Word count: 6.5k+

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Harry’s aching to talk to you. He still has no clue what he did wrong and he desperately wants to fix things, but you won’t even give him the chance–refusing to do so much as make eye contact with him when speaking. You’re humiliated. Not only because you wanted to kiss him, but also because you made it seem like he did something wrong. However, being your non confrontational self, you haven’t gained the courage to explain anything to him. Plus, you don’t want to make Deidre suspicious, so you force yourself to act just as casual as you had before and, of course, she hasn’t noticed a thing.

The day has been nothing out of the ordinary, you’re sprawled across the couch with your leg in the air, allowing your toe-nails to dry after their first coat of olive green nail polish. The weather is exceptionally nice and your hair is still wet from the dip in the pool you had taken earlier when the sun was significantly hotter than it is now. Harry left for groceries an hour or so ago and now you’re just waiting for Deidre to come out of the bedroom so that the two of you can go out and do something together.

“Okay, so-” She calls from the end of the hallway as she walks, “There’s this party tonight that the boys invited me to and I think you should come with me.”

You frown, swinging your legs back over the edge of the couch so that you can sit up straight and look at her. “What?”

She shuffles through the doorway in a crop top and skirt, her shoes clutched in her hand as she runs her fingers through her hair. “C’mon, It’ll be fun! We haven’t gone to a party together in ages.”

“I thought we were gonna go out together, just the two of us. Wasn’t that the whole purpose of this beach getaway? Just us spending time together?”

She shrugs, “I mean, we never really made a plan, it was just an idea.” 

“Well, that’s not fair,” You bite, standing from your spot on the couch and crossing your arms over your chest. “I feel like it was implied that we were going to hang out tonight and now you’re going to some party with people you barely know?”

She rolls her eyes, “We can still hang out at the party!”

“No, Deidre, because I don’t want to go to a party with a bunch of people I don’t know!”

“Oh, come on,” She groans, “Nobody knows anyone at these parties, we’re all just there to have fun!” 

“I still don’t want to go.” 

“Fine. I’ll just go by myself, then.” She huffs, hunching over to slide her shoes on.

You take a deep breath, “I don’t think you should go either.” 

“Oh my god,” She groans, “What are you, my mom?”

“No, I just think, as your best friend, that going to a party with a bunch of people you don’t know very well--a bunch of men you don’t know very well--isn’t a good idea.”

“It’s just a party, I don’t understand why you’re so worked up about it!” She yells, arms flailing around her in frustration as she walks across the living room to the door. 

You drag both your hands down your face, groaning in exasperation. “Deidre, you met these guys a few days ago and they’re asking you to get drunk with them. How do you not see how dangerous that is?”  

“They’re nice guys, they would never do anything to hurt me!” 

“You don’t know that!” You retort, “For all you know, they could be planning to drug you and drag you back to a room to do who knows what to you!”

You hear the honking of a car horn coming from the front of the house and she huffs, shaking her head at you as she leans forward and grabs her purse from the coffee table. “I’m leaving. I’ll send you my location when I get there.” And with that, she’s gone.

You’re left alone in the house, the only sound that can be heard is the choked sob that erupts from your chest as soon as the screen door slams shut behind her. Tears spill down your cheeks with each sob, your body collapsing into the couch before you drop your head into your hands. All you can feel is anger, frustration, and anxiety. You’re concerned for Deidre, however, you’re also infuriated with her. She’s selfish; so selfish, in fact, that she doesn’t even consider that you and her entire family might be affected if anything terrible happens to her. 

You sit there on the couch for what seems like decades, your body wracked with sobs as tears stream down your cheeks. Every emotion from the past few days has suddenly burst from within you and you’re unable to contain it.

Finally, after gathering your emotions as much as possible, you lift yourself from the couch and trudge to the kitchen for some comfort food. Swinging the fridge door open, your eyes almost immediately land on a large, unopened bottle of red wine.

“Fuck it.” You mutter, reaching forward and grasping the chilled, glass bottle by its neck. You place the bottle on the counter as you recklessly search for a corkscrew in one of the many drawers lining the countertop. Moments later, you’re mustering every bit of strength inside of you to open the bottle with the screw and after nearly 10 minutes of struggling, the cork pops out with a loud “THUNK”.

You sigh, reaching for the cabinet above you for a wine glass out of reflex, but you quickly decide against the use of a glass and gulp the liquid straight from the bottle. You know your behavior is reckless, but you can’t find a single part of you that cares. You need the pain and frustration to go away somehow and drowning them with an $11 bottle of wine would suffice for now. 

Dragging yourself out to the patio, you allow the thick, heady liquid to slide down your throat and settle into your empty stomach as you plop yourself into one of the chairs. A loud rumble of thunder in the distance draws your attention from the bottle, causing you to pull it away from your lips for a moment. You watch as a faint, almost unnoticeable, drizzle gradually turns into a steady shower and then into a heavy downpour. The scarce amount of people that had been on the beach when you first stepped out onto the patio are now shoveling all of their belongings into their arms as fast as they can to avoid being trapped in the downpour.

Soon, the beach is completely vacant. Not a soul is in sight and, oddly enough, you’re drawn to it. Nearly two-thirds of the bottle is resting warmly in your stomach at this point, so your decision making skills are not the most reliable, but something’s telling you to go out and sit in the rain. So, after chugging the rest of the bottle (and quickly rushing inside to use the bathroom because alcohol on an empty stomach is like a free pass to pissing yourself), you allow your intoxicated brain to wisp you down the patio stairs and into the thick, sopping wet sand.  

Your clothes have already begun to soak through from the rain as you stumble along the shore, but you can’t bring yourself to care. Your eyes are swollen and bloodshot from crying and your head is throbbing with every step you take. Then, you stop, allowing your body to drop down into the sand before looping your arms around your bent legs and tugging them to your chest.

It’s nearing dusk as you sit there, the sun slowly sinking further and further beneath the horizon behind thick clouds. Your clothes are completely soaked through by this point, but, in your drunken state, you can’t find a reason to care. Tears begin to spill down your cheeks again, mixing with the rain drops already pelting your face and you don’t even bother to wipe them away. Your chest feels numb from the sobs that incessantly wrack your body, but you can’t find the strength to stop. It feels like you’re trapped. Unable to escape the sinking loneliness that increases with every moment of every day and ignoring it only makes it worse. 

When you’d first agreed to the trip, you were given a sense of hope. You thought that maybe, if you were around people that made you happy, your loneliness would dissipate and you wouldn’t feel like this anymore; but it’s only become worse.

Unbeknownst to you, Harry is sprinting from his car with an armful of groceries to the front door of the beach house and swinging it open. He calls for Deidre, then calls for you finding silence within the house. He frowns, stumbling further into the living room towards the kitchen so that he can set the large, paper bags down on the table to relieve himself of their weight. He leaves the bags there and begins to search the rooms, finding each one of them empty and becoming even more confused. Lastly, he slides the patio door open to find each chair empty, the empty wine bottle sitting alone on the metal patio table. He steps out, shutting the door behind him before walking to the table and taking the bottle into his hands. The glass is still damp with perspiration, but there isn’t more than a few tablespoons of wine left sloshing at the bottom of the bottle. He places it back where it had been resting before as he lifts his head to look out at the beach. The downpour is so thick that it’s difficult to make out any sort of shapes, but when his eyes land on your figure in the sand, his heart nearly leaps from his chest. 

He calls your name as he bounds down the porch stairs and into the sand, jogging to where you sit with your knees pressed to your chest. You turn to him with a sorrowful expression, lip quivering uncontrollably with your weak sobs. 

“What happened? What’s wrong?” He stutters, dropping to his knees beside you with one hand on your back and the other on your knee. “Are you hurt? Should I call somebody?”

You shake your head. “M’alright.”

“It doesn’t look like you’re alright,” He frowns, reaching his right hand up to gently turn your face towards him. “Wh- why are you- what’s going on? Why are you out here in this weather all alone?” 

The rain is still incessant and it’s hard for either of you to see anything but you’re able to sense just how much Harry cares. You wipe your nose with the back of your hand and shake your head. 

“Dee went out,” You slur quietly. “Then, I had a bit of wine.”

“You’re crying.” He points out.

You shake your head again, avoiding his eye contact. “S’just the rain.”

He sighs in defeat, hand dropping from your face as he pushes his wet hair from his own. “C’mon, let’s get you inside.” He grasps your hands gently as he stands, pulling you up with him. You stumble slightly, falling into him and his arms reflexively wrap around your waist, mumbling: “Easy, darling.”

The unremitting mizzle of rain pelts against the both of you as he drags you back up to the house with one arm wrapped around your waist. Your head leans lazily against his shoulder and your body melts into his due to  the alcohol coursing through your veins. Keeping a tight grip on you, Harry quickly leads you up the porch stairs and back inside the house, careful to keep you from tripping over your own feet. 

The temperature of the house is slightly cooler than outside and you’re unable to keep your teeth from chattering as you step inside. Harry notices this.

“Stay right here, I’m gonna go get some towels.” He mutters, shuffling off down the hallway and leaving you standing soaked, shivering, and intoxicated in the entryway. He returns within a few moments holding a stack of fluffy pink towels (courtesy of the beach house owners), quickly unfolding one of them and wrapping it around your shoulders. You tug the fabric around yourself, teeth chattering as you take a deep breath and look up at him through bloodshot eyes.

“Thank you.” 

He nods, taking a towel for himself and leaning over to shake out his dripping hair. You step past him into the hallway, walking towards your bedroom with the towel still wrapped around your shivering frame. The house feels like it's spinning with every step you take, your hand pressed against the wall to support yourself as you guide yourself to the bedroom. You know Harry’s watching you, longing to ask you why you were out in the rain completely wasted, but you don’t feel sober enough to trust him or yourself. 

Stumbling into your bedroom, you shuffle through your drawer for some dry clothes, settling on an oversized sweatshirt and sweatpants. You don’t even bother with closing the door all the way as you peel the wet clothes from your skin, carelessly dropping them onto the carpet. After you successfully pull the sweatshirt on, you attempt putting on the sweatpants, discovering that in your drunken state, finding the correct leg hole is much harder than you anticipated. So, after struggling for all of one minute, you huff and throw them aside. 

“Need help?” 

You glance up from where you sit on the edge of the bed to find Harry leaning against the doorway, dressed in a dry t-shirt and sweatpants. You frown, “Were you watching me?”

“No,” He pauses. “I mean- just for a moment, but I swear I didn’t see anything.”

You nod slowly with a yawn, “It’s okay. I’m too drunk to care, anyway.”

He chuckles at that and watches as you stand, stumbling to the upper end of the bed and pulling the comforter down to make room for you to slide beneath it. You plop yourself onto the mattress with a yawn, patting the empty space beside you and looking up at him. 

He raises his eyebrows, “Y’want me to…?” You nod at his unfinished question, giving him a small, drunken grin. So, after a moment of hesitation, Harry walks over to the bed and climbs into the empty spot beside you with your eyes glued to him the whole time. He sighs, “What now?”

“Will you… hold me?” You request quietly, avoiding his soft, virescent stare. 

He pauses. There isn’t a single fiber of his being that doesn’t want to feel your warmth against him, arms looped around your waist, nose buried into the crevice of your neck; but he knows that you’re drunk and he can’t be sure that you won’t regret anything once the intoxication has passed. 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah,” You shrug. “Unless, of course, you aren’t comfortable with it,”

“I am, but you aren’t fully… ‘here’ right now and I don’t want you to regret anything.”

You sigh, “I think I’m sober enough to ask you to harmlessly spoon me to sleep.”

“Alright,” He nods, moving to lay on his side, head against the pillow. “C’mere, then.”

You smile to yourself, leaning over to switch the small bedside lamp off before allowing your body to lie against the mattress fully before turning to face away from him, waiting for him to wrap his arms around you. The hem of your sweatshirt rides up with your movement and, although you’re completely oblivious to it, Harry notices. His eyes focus on the soft skin of your hip and the thin fabric of your panties resting against it. Fuck. Swallowing the heavy lump wedged in his throat, he moves forward and loops his arm around your waist, tugging your back into his chest with a quiet grunt. 

One may assume that two people in this situation, given the status of your relationship being strictly friends (in the lightest sense of the word), would feel uncomfortable or awkward, but both of you, somehow, feel a sense of relief. Two long, breathy sighs emit from both of you in unison as your bodies fit together like two pieces of thread, meant to intertwine perfectly to create a beautiful piece of clothing. 

The two of you lie there in the dark silence, taking slow, deep breaths to calm your fluttering heartbeats as the tension builds. If you were sober, you definitely wouldn’t have even considered being in this situation, but since there’s nearly 25 ounces of liquid courage coursing through your veins, you’re unable to keep yourself from being brutally honest about what you want. Silently, you move your hand from where it rests on the mattress, sliding it over his hand that rests just between your stomach and ribs and taking it into your own. He feels your hand, but doesn’t say anything.

Every sense of your caution has been thrown to the wind at this point, so you don’t even consider hesitating when asking: “Do you remember that song that came on the other day when we were in the car?”

He’s caught completely off guard by your question and frowns. “I-uh, yeah, I remember. ‘Dancing With Myself’?”

You nod in acknowledgement, silence settling over you again for a few lasting moments before you speak again. “The other day when you were talking about the meaning of that song, how it sounds upbeat and happy but the lyrics are actually him talking about how lonely he is, it reminded me of myself…” You pause, sighing quietly, trying to blink away the inevitable tears. You can sense that he’s listening, though, so you continue. “I just- sometimes it’s hard for me to feel at home with people even if they are my friends, and there are many times when I just see myself with them and I just don’t even feel like I’m there. Like, despite being in a room full of people, like the song says, I’m dancing with myself, trying in vain to make myself look like the exact opposite of how I feel. It’s like I just have to go through life alone, despite the people around me.”

He’s quiet for a while and it scares you. Maybe you said too much. Maybe he’s uncomfortable. You squeeze your eyes shut, preparing for the tears to spill and then he speaks.

“Is that- is that why you were crying?”

“Partially,” You whisper, staring straight ahead into the dark room. Harry’s arm moves a little and then you feel his fingers brushing against your hand before lacing his fingers between your own without a word. His body presses closer to yours and you ever so faintly feel his lips against your shoulder for just a moment. 

“I’m sorry.”

You squeeze your eyes shut, letting the tears fall and trickle down onto the pillow where your head lays. “It fucking hurts,” You take a long, shaky breath. “It hurts when I can’t even tell my best friend about how I feel because I feel like I’m being selfish for giving her the weight of my issues.”

“You’re not being selfish,” He whispers, squeezing your hand gently. “If you’re hurting, she should be there for you no matter what. Just like you are with her,” He pauses for a beat, taking a deep breath. “I think you’re one of the most caring people I have ever met. You have always been there for Deidre even though recently she’s been a bit of twat to you.” 

“Yeah,” You chuckle at that and he breathes a small laugh, tightening his arms around you. Silence settles around you once more, and you think that maybe he’s fallen asleep but then he stirs and moves his hand from yours to tilt your face and body in his direction, leaning over you. Your eyes meet as he gently swipes his thumb against your damp skin, collecting the tears that had just escaped from your eyes with a small smile. Just as he is about to drop his hand from your face, you grasp him by the wrist, pressing his large palm to the curve of your cheek. His gaze flickers between your lips and your eyes, even in the darkness of the bedroom you’re able to make out each other’s faces and you see the edges of his lips curl up into the faintest smile. 

“Also,” You breathe, thumb stroking the skin of his wrist gently, “I’m sorry about the other night.”

It takes a moment for him to process what you mean, but when he does he shakes his head. “No, no, it was my fault. You didn’t want me to kiss you and I shouldn’t have crossed your boundaries like that. I’m sorry.”

“No, Harry, that’s not-” You sigh, “I just- I was afraid it would mess things up with Deidre and I was putting her feelings before my own, which I now realize wasn’t fair to either of us.” You motion between the two of you.

“I get it,” He nods, watching as you take his hand from your cheek and interlock your fingers between his. You’re still mildly intoxicated, so your confidence levels are also quite a bit higher than normal. Harry watches you in silence, the two of you mindlessly fiddling with each other’s fingers like it was the most normal thing in the world for you to do. And then he clears his throat. “So, you- you did want to kiss me?”

You pause, bottom lip slipping between your teeth as you look up at his face. “Yeah.”

“Hm… good to know.” 

Silence falls over the two of you again as you focus back on your fingers dancing against his. You want to keep talking to him; You want to say ‘fuck it’ and throw every bit of caution to the wind regarding Deidre, falling into this “scandalous” affair with her brother; You want to tell him how you feel, express every bit of longing you’ve had for him since the first day his dimpled smile met your gaze, but you’re finding it harder and harder to keep your eyes open, the alcohol in your system taking over and pushing you to surrender. So you do.

You yawn, “I think I should probably go to sleep now.”

“I can leave if you want…” He responds, lifting himself up from the mattress slightly, but you stop him with a quick shake of your head, tugging his arm back around your waist. 

“Stay until I fall asleep?” 

He smiles to himself, arms tightening around you as he nuzzles his face into your hair. “Okay.”

Harry hadn’t intended on falling asleep with you. He’d planned on waiting until you fell asleep and then would  sneak off to his own bed, but it’s morning now and the two of you are lying fast asleep in the exact position you were in the night before. His arms wound tightly around you, chest pressed to your back, and his nose pressed into the base of your neck. In a way, the warmth and peace his arms give you feel completely normal; like you’re long-term lovers, dozing in the soft morning sunlight, awaiting the new day.

The alarming screech of your ringtone rudely interrupts your slumber and causes you to lift yourself from the mattress and angrily slap your hand around in search of your phone. Finding it, you squint at the illuminated screen to see Deidre’s profile picture and name, you groan and push yourself to sit up on the mattress as you slide your finger across the screen to answer the call.

“Hello?” You croak, knuckling frustratedly at your puffy, sleep-filled eyes.

“Hi,” She sounds out of breath, almost frantic. “I know you’re probably still mad at me but everything is okay. I didn’t come home last night because I ended up passing out on Jeff’s couch after everyone left and he failed to wake me up, even though I told him to. But yeah, um, I’m sorry, I’m on my way home. Please don’t be mad at me.”

You should be mad at her, but it’s early and your hungover brain is making it harder for you to form any sort of emotion. “It’s fine. We-I fell asleep early anyways so I didn’t notice.”

She sighs in relief, “Okay. Well, I’ll be home in like 10 minutes,”

“See ya.” You mumble half-heartedly before the line cuts out and you’re dropping your phone into your lap with a yawn. Somehow, during that conversation, you’d completely forgotten the presence of Harry. That is, until he clears his throat and shuffles on the bed, causing you to turn and look at him. 

“G’morning,” He mutters, his deep, syrupy accent tainted with sleep. “Was that-?”

“Deidre, yeah,” You finish, rubbing your hands over your face. “She’s on her way.”

“Oh… then I should- I should probably get out of here,”

You nod and he pushes the comforter off of his body, sliding over the side of the bed and planting his feet against the carpeted floor. Once he’s left the room, you drag yourself out of bed to change into something a bit more appropriate.

Your memory of the night before is somewhat of a blur due to the amount of wine you’d consumed, but you do remember the things you said to him right before falling asleep; the way he touched and held you like you were his own. Your heart flutters at the memory of the way he brushed a fallen tear from your skin and spoke to you in a soft, soothing voice. You’ve deceived yourself by saying that this is just a crush, because it’s more than that and deep down you’re slowly beginning to realize it. 

After pulling on the clean, discarded sweatpants that, in your drunken frustration, had been left in a crumple on the floor, you make your way to the kitchen. Harry’s there already, spreading mashed avocado onto freshly toasted bread before lightly salting it with garlic salt and placing a perfectly fried egg on top. He’s humming to himself as he works to make more slices and you smile, clearing your throat to catch his attention.

He turns his head in your direction. “Oh, hey! Do you want one slice or two?” 

“Um, I’ll have two, please,” You respond, slowly making your way across the small kitchen to where he stands at the counter. “You didn’t have to make breakfast, though,”

He shakes his head as he sucks a bit of avocado from his thumb. “It’s no problem, really. I don’t mind.”

Just as he finishes his sentence, Deidre walks through the front door, calling: “Hello! I’m back!” 

You walk through the kitchen doorway to find her at the door, sporting the same outfit as she had been last night. Her hair is tied up into a messy bun, though, and her shoes are in her hand instead of on her feet. 

“Good morning,” You greet.

She tosses her shoes aside and smiles at you. “Hey, I’m sorry about last night. Can we talk later?”

“Yeah, sure.” You nod and give her a small smile back, lacking the energy to still be mad at her and giving into your tendency of forgiveness. 

As she follows you into the kitchen, she greets Harry with a quick ‘good morning’, grabbing a fully assembled piece of toast from him before scurrying off for a shower and leaving the two of you alone once more. It’s easier being around him now. There’s a hint of tension now, but it isn’t malicious or uncomfortable tension. You feel drawn to him even more than you did before and you can tell he’s feeling the same way. 

“God, Harry, that was so good.” You nearly moan as you wipe the crumbs of toast from your fingertips.

He smiles, swallowing and wiping the corner of his mouth. “M’glad you liked it.”

“You’ll have to teach me your cooking and baking skills someday,” You chuckle, subtly hinting at spending more time with him. 

He downs the rest of the coffee in his mug, humming. “I’d love to.”

You smile at him, standing to take your dishes to the sink and holding out your hand for his. He frowns and shakes his head. “None of that, I’ll clean up.”

“At least let me help.” You pout. 

He chuckles. “If you insist.”

You follow him to the sink, watching as he takes the dishes and begins to rinse them and hand them over to you so that you can place them into the dishwasher. There really isn’t much of a reason for you to be helping him, but you’re finding it hard to keep yourself away from him. The giddy flutter of your heart when his fingers brush against yours and the flirtatious smiles spread across your faces makes you feel utterly alive and you never want it to end. But, eventually, there are no more dishes to clean and you’re in desperate need of a shower, so he thanks you for your help and the two of you go your separate ways.

Cold, frothy water splashes against your bare feet as you walk along the sandy shore. Your sandals are dangling from your fingertips and your loose-fitted jeans are rolled up to your shins to allow a more comfortable stroll. The sun is just beginning to set, casting a peach hue along the crystal-like water as it rolls lazily back and forth. 

Deidre is a few feet behind you, collecting a lone seashell she’d spotted during her stroll. A quiet moment passes and then she’s beside you again, palm stretched out into your direction to show you the small, detailed shell with a glowing pride. 

“Oh, that one’s gorgeous.” You gush at its beauty, taking it between your own fingers to examine it further. It’s a small tulip shell, only about two inches in size, but its shimmery, pearlish gleam is almost breathtaking under the dim sunlight. 

“Think I’ll try to find another one and make them into earrings.” She smiles as you place it back into her hand. 

“Yeah, that’d be cute!”

The two of you have only just left the beach house in an effort to be somewhere alone so the two of you can talk things out. Deidre is silent for a moment, both of you ruminating the possible ways to begin the conversation. Then, she speaks.

“I’m sorry for leaving you like that yesterday, that wasn’t very cool of me.”

You smile a little, “Thanks. I’m sorry for getting so upset with you. I definitely could’ve handled that better.”

She nods. “Yeah. I think we both could’ve handled that much better.”

“Definitely,” You agree, kicking the damp sand with your bare feet. “I just think that, you know, you promised to spend time with me on this trip and I feel like I’ve barely seen you. And I’m glad you’ve made friends, but I’d kinda like to just spend time with you at some point.”

“Yeah,” She sighs, “I’m sorry.”

You turn to her, stopping in your tracks and opening your arms for a hug. “Are we good?”

“Of course.” She smiles and wraps you into a giant bear hug, causing both of you to stumble on the sand a bit. Both of you are giggling uncontrollably once you pull away, nearly falling into the sand beneath your feet. 

“I’ll race you back to the house,” You smile deviously, planting your feet in the starting position and waiting for her to do the same. 

She smirks and positions herself beside you. “Oh, you’re on.”

The two of you bolt towards the house at top speed, sand kicking up behind you in big clouds as scurry along the beach under the pale evening sunlight. 

You reach the house moments before her, immediately collapsing into the sand in front of the stairs to catch your breath. Deidre is quick to stumble up behind you, nearly skidding to a stop as she takes several big gulps of air through a laugh. 

“Still got it,” You wink at her, a similar image of the two of you in the same positions at a much younger age flashing across your mind briefly. 

She flashes you a mocking smile with a tilt to her head and then the repetitive ring of her phone in her pocket interrupts the moment. You watch as she tugs it from her pocket, sliding her finger across the screen and lifting it to her ear with a peppy greeting to the other person on the line. Immediately by the tone of her voice you know exactly what’s about to happen. She’s going to do exactly what she’s been doing since the trip began– or rather, since the two of you were teenagers– she’s going to sputter out a mouthful of excuses and then she’s going to leave.

“Okay, I’ll be out front in five minutes! See ya!” She says before sliding her phone back into her pocket and smiling at you. “That was Jeffrey and his friends, they invited me out again tonight and I promised I would go.”  

She doesn’t even fucking realize...

Sheathing your blinding frustration with a tinge of annoyance, you nod, motion up the stairs before mumbling: “Well, then, you better get going.”

Watching her scurry back up the stairs and into the house, your heart sinks into your chest. She’s so used to you just allowing things like this to happen that she doesn’t even realize how much it’s hurting your relationship and how much it’s hurting you.

After dropping your sandals there you find yourself wandering from the bottom of the stairs back out into the shore, lazily kicking at the shallow water whilst your arms are wrapped around your chest. It’s gotten much darker and people are beginning to filter out through the dunes, lugging their belongings or simply just walking hand in hand. 

The waves crash repeatedly with a lulling, crisp sound that drowns out all other sound in your ears. The air is warm and so is the wind as it swirls and whips around you, causing the loose fabric of your sweater to flap obnoxiously. 

Faintly in the distance, you can hear the screen door of the back porch swing shut and it draws your eyes back up to the house where Harry bounds down the stairs with a smile on his face. A smile just for you.

“Hey!” He calls, gasping for air as he jogs towards you across the sand. You wave back at him with a small smile, crossing your arms over your chest as you stand and wait for him to reach you. 

“Hi,”

“You alright?” He frowns, stepping closer to you. 

You sigh, fingertips pressed against your forehead in a weak attempt to hide your distress. “I- uh, yeah I’m okay.”

“Doesn’t really look like it,” He says, tilting his head to examine your face a bit better. 

You squeeze your eyes shut in an attempt to hold back the tears beginning to build at the edge of your lash line, taking a deep breath. “It’s just- fuck, Harry, she keeps doing it. She keeps telling me that she wants to spend more time together and then she just leaves me. And she doesn’t even fucking realize it,” You look back up at him in the dim evening lighting, wrapping your sweater clad arms around yourself. “Like- what am I supposed to do? She doesn’t listen to me.”

A pregnant pause follows when you finish speaking before Harry speaks. “I don’t know if you can really do anything. Deidre is going to do what she wants to do, regardless of how it affects you.”

He’s right. As much as you never thought you’d actually admit it to yourself, you know he’s right. It feels almost as if a weight has been lifted off your chest; a weight that’s been there since you and Deidre blossomed into teenagers and she gradually began to treat you this way. And then you’re looking back at Harry, gears turning in your brain at a pace that’s almost too fast for you to process. Then, without any sort of caution or judgement as to what it might result in, you’re surging forward pressing a hand to the back of his neck, beneath his mop of hair, and frantically pulling his lips against yours. 

It takes a millisecond for him to react, but then he’s kissing you back harder, long arms coming to wrap around your waist and press you into his chest as his soft, supple lips move skillfully against yours. Every long, heart aching year that passed that you had grown to care for him flashes through your mind; every smile he directed at you; every time he wrapped his arms around you in a giant bear hug, mumbling: “Nice to see you,” in your ear; every moment that you spent falling in love with him. 

He’s the first to pull away, arms unwavering from their place around you. “What about Deidre?”

You stare back at him for a moment before shaking your head, mumbling: “I don’t care.” under your breath, eyes flickering down to his lips before both of you are lunging forward once again. 

Both of you stumble around on the sand for a moment and then Harry falls back into the sand, ass first, bringing you down with him. The two of you are a fit of giggles and snorts as you land in the fluffy, damp sand, limbs tangled between limbs. You land with your legs straddling his slim waist, hands planted against the sand beneath him, hovering over him with a smile. He gazes back up at you with his own dimpled smile, his hands resting cautiously on your hips. He stares at you, studying your face as the two of you catch your breath before he says something that has your stomach twisting into knots and your skin bursting into flames. 

“You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,”

You lift one of your hands to cover your face, giggling nervously at his words as he lifts himself to sit in the sand with you in his lap. “I’m serious.”

“Why?” You whisper in response, hands coming to rest on his shoulders. 

“God,” He mumbles your name, “You might not see it, but I see it. And I’ve seen it since we were kids; since I was 18.”

You’re speechless, unable to form a full sentence to respond to him, so you just grab his face between your hands and latch your lips onto his again. You stay like that, lips dragging against each other’s lazily until the sun finishes setting and the only source of light comes from the bright glow of the moon. And then he pulls away again, hooded eyelids trained on yours. 

“Let me take you out. Like, on a date.”

You smile, “Okay.”

don’t forget to reblog if u enjoyed!!<3

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[ch4nb4ng]

Shine

Pairings: fem reader X hyunjin (a little bit of minho)

Warnings: oral sex, penetration, possible (?) harsh words (like rejection), masturbation 

Word Count: 10.3k

A/N: i have not posted for a while and i do apologise ive had a lot of family stuff going on. this took me a while to write so i hope you enjoy it :)

The sudden arms around your waist took you by surprise as you scooped the ice cream from the tub to your glass.

“Hi y/n,” Hyunjin giggled, his muffled breath dancing across your neck. Your body froze, unable to comprehend what had just happened. Yes, he had always been this touchy feely kind of person, but the amount of flirtation had increased recently; it was frustrating.

He used to be this cute little boy, full of life and innocence. Short black hair that used to flop over his eyes, bare, pale skin; pretty much as plain as they come. Hyunjin always had such a gentle nature about him. He supported you in whatever you wanted to do and dream of. He was the dictionary definition of a best friend. His personality didn’t change, but other things began too, especially for you. You were high school sweethearts. Always at each other’s hip, studying together, hanging out together at parties, after school; wherever. You both got into the same college, deciding to live together. That was when things began to take a turn. From growing out his hair, dyeing it blonde, getting a lip ring (and multiple other piercings), and, not to mention the multitude of tattoos he started to get carved onto his body was making you feel a different way. Even the way he dressed. You wouldn’t be able to lose him if you went out; the clanging of the chains dangling from his hips and neck was impossible not to hear. He wasn’t the pure, wholesome boy you used to know, and that had become a very, very pressing problem for you.

“Heyyyyyy,” you gasped, breath heavy from the slight scare attack he gave you. Your eyes automatically gazing at the slightly exposed skin showing due to the unbuttoned first button on his loose shirt.

“Oh my god Hyunjin,” your eyes widened, pushing his clothing to the side, “you got another tattoo?”

“Yeah what do you think?”

You ignored his question, starting to analyse it heavenly. A large, striking dagger; god, that was sexy. Biting down on your bottom lip, you giggled, lightly tracing your finger across the outline.

“I do like it actually.”

You smiled, looking up at him. How were the two of you suddenly so close? A hand was resting on your hip, you couldn’t help but feel the heat rush to your face. God he was such a fucking flirt, it was so irritating. Like he loved to play with you; see how much of a reaction he could get from you. You were clearly wrapped around his finger. It wasn’t like he wasn’t intelligent either. He began to know his way around girls, you would be completely dumbfounded if he hadn’t yet worked out the feelings you had for him. You wouldn’t even think twice, but when he’s looking at you, like that, inches away from your lips, it was hypnotising, leaving you wanting more every time. The cocky smirk fell from his face, spinning away from you and dropping onto the couch to watch some tv. He looked at you, playfully smiling as he pat the empty area next to him, inviting you to sit with him. Unable to refuse, you scurried over, legs slightly pushed against his as he flicked through the channels for something to watch. A comfortable silence fell over the room as you rested your head on his shoulder, a lively hum escaping his lips at the gentle contact.

“Are you doing anything tonight y/n?”

“I was going to ask you actually, do you think you could help me with algebra prac tonight?”

That playful smirk returned to his face, making your stomach swoon. How could he not know the effect his mysterious look had on you? You tucked your hair behind your ears, abruptly standing up and walking to your room, shutting the door behind you. Hyunjin’s eyebrows furrowed at your shortness; it somehow began to make his heart hurt. Immediate panic came over him as he ran after you, gently knocking on your door.

“Y/n?”

No response.

“Y/n? Is everything okay?”

“Yes Hyunjin,” you reply, opening the door with a smile. A wave of relief flooded through Hyunjin seeing you happy. He wanted nothing but for you to be happy. It was when he became the happiest. If you showed him any sign of sadness or stress, he felt like he was losing his mind. You were his number one priority. Regardless if he had a million things going on, you being content was the only thing that had mattered. 

You snapped him out of his thoughts, clicking in front of his face as you let him come to your room and take the seat next to you at your desk. Opening your book made his eyes automatically widen. You felt puzzled, beginning to stress slightly. If he didn’t know how to do it, how would you learn? Hyunjin was the only one who could actually get through to you when it came to understanding the multitude of theories you had to memorise. You felt your shoulders, which were previously tense, relax once he stood back up, letting his hands rest on you, thumbs digging slightly into your muscles as he began to analyse your work. A muffled whine escaped your lips at the feeling of his touch; so delicate, yet so rough. Tilting your head, you pushed your hair to the side; nothing more needed to be said. Hyunjin chuckled, enjoying your playful antics. His fingertips traveled across your skin, slowly reaching up to your neck. Rolling your head forward, you became limp. It was so exhausting putting up a facade in front of him. Just this one time, you could give into his touch.

“Y/n you’re so tight-”

“What?”

Your body froze. You weren’t sure if you had heard him correctly.

“Your muscles are so tight, is this really stressing you out?”

“Oh,” you replied, slightly relieved, “uhm, yeah it is. I honestly don't understand it at all.”

“Well we cannot work under these conditions,” he gasped, “get on your bed for me why don't you?”

You were flabbergasted. 

“Y/n, get your mind out of the gutter,” he snickered, causing you to playfully hit his arm.

You followed his instructions, stomach pressed against the quilt of your bed. Your eyes were closed, slightly becoming patient at the way Hyunjin was taking his time with you. 

“Are you ready for the best massage of your life?”

“Sure am Jinnie.”

You couldn’t stop the smile that was forming on your lips. The way Hyunjin climbed onto your bed, sitting on top of you, delicately moving your hair to make sure your back was exposed and bare to him. The way he was leaning down, lips almost pressing to your ear as his fingers began to sink into your skin. A small groan left your lips. Hyunjin had now grasped a good feeling of your body, knowing all the spots that were making you uptight. The temperature in the room was rising, whether you wanted to accept it or not. Your arousal was becoming apparent, core becoming hotter with each passing moment. Thumb digging into every place you longed for him. They began to travel, lingering under the edge of your shirt. It was obvious that Hyunjin’s only intentions were to make you feel better. You weren’t sure if it was the satisfactory chuckle that left his lips every two seconds, or the slight hard on that was becoming pressed against your thigh. Surely this was anything but innocent. Releasing the stress so he could help you with your homework. But the moans leaving your mouth was slowly but surely changing the atmosphere of the originally family friendly, helpful environment that was once created. 

“Your hands feel so good,” you blurted out, quickly burying your face into the sheets. You couldn’t believe you had just said that out loud. Your heart began to race in anticipation, dying for Hyunjin to say literally anything.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better,” he hummed, standing up. An almost whimper escaped your lips. Dabbing your fingers to your forehead, you gasped. You were already sweating. A blush creeping onto your face. If he could make you this hot from a playful massage, imagine what else he could do with those fingers.

Taking your previous position on your chair, your head was feeling dizzy. Hyunjin began to explain the equation, yet all you could think about was his hands wrapped around your neck, trickling down your sides and to your-

“So do you understand it now y/n, y/n?”

“Oh,” you looked up, avoiding his piercing gaze, “um, yeah, i do, thank you.”

“God,” he huffed, rolling his eyes, “you must be real tired huh?”

“What? No Im fine-”

“Let me tuck you into bed.”

“Into bed?”

“Yeah,” he grinned, walking over and pulling the sheets back, “you aren’t listening to me so I think you need to rest, come here.”

Unable to refuse him, you quickly hopped in. Your body was tense, waiting for Hyunjin to leave. But he didn’t. The feeling of his arms wrapping around your torso, muscular frame pressing into your back. Your muscles began to relax straight away, practically melting into him. God, he liked to make things hard for you.

“Let’s get some sleep, and we can go over this in the library, okay y/n?”

“Mhmm,” you hummed, all your senses shutting off for the night. The last thing you heard was his baby breaths, tickling the back of your neck

***

Your eyes were awake, feeling the dishevelled strands of hair sprawled across your face, bed sheets completely tangled. A slick smile spread across your face at the thoughts of last night's subtle, yet not so subtle actions. You slapped yourself across the face. Getting out of bed, you made your way to the kitchen, still drowsy from the good quality sleep, and company you had. Tensions were high all of yesterday, keeping you aroused for a prolonged period of time. Wanting to have some fun, you decided to change out of the clothes you were in, stripping off and wearing nothing but your silk robe as you made your way to the kitchen. 

“Morning sleepy head,” Hyunjin smiled, taking his tongue in between his teeth as he began to look you up and down. One hand on the frying pan, the other leaning on the kitchen bench, “you tryna put on a show for me or what ?”

“Pfft,” you scoffed, joining him in leaning against the bench, “you wish Mr. Hwang.”

“Yeah uh, anyways,” he interjected, followed by a small cough, “i’m gonna have a shower and then we can head to the library.”

“Uh sure bub,” you smile, stealing a piece of toast from his plate, “I’ll go get ready and grab my stuff.”

Sending a wink Hyunjin’s way, you headed back to your room, collecting your thoughts and self together. 

His jaw clenched as soon he saw your behind. A frustrated hand ran through his hair. “God,” he mumbled to himself. Quickly cleaning the frying pan, he headed to the shower, turning the water on, extra hot. Hands relying on the glass frame, he let the steaming droplets run down his body. Eyes closed, he began to think, hard, compartmentalising the many thoughts of you running through his mind. One hand began to trail down his neck, dragging down the center of his body. A small groan escaped his lips, letting his fingertips gently wrap around his base. The combination of water and steam filled his vision as he began to pump himself, images of your exposed body lying in front of him, having you all to himself. His grip became harder at thought, having you moan his name over and over, tongue dragging across his chest, marking the ink that practically covered him. 

“Fuck,” he groaned, “y/n.”

Hyunjin stumbled backwards, letting his back dig into the sidewall as he threw his head back. Grabbing the soap, he held it above his head, letting it dangle across his length. He was already sensitive; the feeling of the cold liquid sending a shiver down his spine. Letting both of his hands now wrap around his cock, he made his own jaw drop. Images of his hands imprinted around your torso, completely manhandling you was making him dizzy. He wanted it, you, so bad.His thoughts were warped on a daily basis; they were all about you. All the times he thought about grabbing your waist, slamming you against the wall as he double pumped himself, jaw dropping open as his hips began to buck up. He was becoming desperate to touch you, to feel you under him. He wanted you squirming, begging for you. He just wanted to make you feel good. 

“Ah fuck y/n, I’m cuming,” he whined, seeing his liquid cover the glass. He stood there for minutes, heavily panting as he came down from his high. Eyes wide open, head snapping forward, Hyunjin turned off the water, quickly dressing himself and heading out to the couch to wait for you.

***

“Do you get it now?”

“Yes,” you exclaimed, “finally, thank you Hyunjin.”

What felt like hours of studying was finally paying off. Having hyunjin as your teacher was another bonus of course. The subtle grazes against your leg, his small thumb rubbing circles on your back. You were surprised how your body never went into sensory overload. Hyunjin’s touch was delicate, yet so enticing. Like he knew exactly what he was doing to you. His daily entertainment; how flustered could he make you? You adjusted your posture, a nervous cough escaping your chest, making Hyunjin chuckle.

“y/n, are you okay?”

“Uh yeah,” you shrugged, “why wouldn’t I be?”

“You seem flustered?” he questioned, a hint of innocence in his tone. Placing each elbow on the table, he smirked, gaze strong on you,

“Am i turning you on right now?”

Face beginning to feel hot, you began to laugh, playfully hitting him to avert that fact that you actually were flustered.

“Hyunjin, dont be stupid!”

He began to laugh with you, making your heart hurt a little. You knew it was all fun and games for him and he was just mucking around. Most of the time you found it funny too, but there were moments where you wished that he was being serious; this was one of these moments.

“Hyunjin’s teaching skills are okay from what i’ve seen.”

A huge grin swiped your face as you saw Minho, Chan and Jisung approach your table.

“My favorite people,” you paused half way through the sentence, turning to Hyunjin, “how are you guys doing!”

“I’m doing great,” Chan winked, making you gag on the spot. The boys began an uproar of laughter, completely dying at the way you completely rejected him. He was always harmlessly playful with you; this was regular banter you shared.

“Anyways,” Minho interjected, “we are all doing good, studying of course, the usual. I wanna go out though.”

“Oh my god yes,” Jisung gasped, “that’s such a good idea!”

“We haven’t gone out in so long,” you sighed, “I’m down.”

All of the boys clapped. What felt like a stressful, exhausting energy became a peaceful, relaxing one. Going out clubbing with the boys was so much fun. Things sometimes went south, but nonetheless, when everyone’s drunk, everyone’s having fun. 

“We just finished studying actually,” Jisung smiled, collecting his books and standing up, “if you guys are done we can go out for dinner tonight and then go out?”

“Oh um, I'm gonna study for a bit longer,” Hyunjin interjected, “and then I'll meet you guys out.”

Nodding in response, the rest of the boys got up, making their way back to their dorms. Minho remained seated.

“I-I’m gonna study for a bit longer as well. We can get something to eat and meet you guys later?”

You smiled at them; that was until you felt a heavy blow to your backside, causing half the students to turn and look at you.

“Hyunjin,” you whispered, “what the fuck was that for?”

Playing with your fingertips previously, Hyunjin wrapped his fingers around your wrist, pulling you back down, letting his ink covered fingertips sit on your neck,

“You know I'm just mucking around,” he whispered, moving closer to your ear, “were you thinking of something different?”

Pulling away from him, your eyes widened, playfully hitting him once more before grabbing your stuff and finally leaving. 

Waiting for a cue of privacy, Minho coughed obnoxiously, steering Hyunjin’s gaze away from behind.

“So,” Minho began, “y/n looked real cute today all snuggled up against you.”

“Oh,” Hyunjin nervously chuckled, “i don't know what you're talking about.”

“You know,” Minho leaned closer to him, “I think i’m gonna ask her out.”

Hyunjin’s jaw clenched. A pang hit him at the base of his stomach.

“Oh,” Hyunjin mumbled, “since when have you been interested in y/n?”

“Uh, since she started hanging around us,” he scoffed, making Hyunjin's fingers curl into his palm, “I was just telling you because, well, you know, you’re the closest to her and incase you guys has something going on -”

“We don't.” 

“Are you sure,” Minho questioned, slightly enjoying how easily he could rile him up, “say something now because if you don't, she’s gonna end up in my bed tonight-”

“I told you, there’s no problem. I'm gonna go back to my room and have a shower, do you want to come then we can go eat with y/n?”

Both boys were now standing, close together. The atmosphere had changed from playful to territorial very quickly. You could cut it with a knife.

“Sounds good to me. She’ll say no though, I know her too well.”

Hyunjin wanted to punch the extremely cocky smirk spreading across Minho’s face. It was no secret that Minho’s reputation with girls was, well, extensive. From one night stands, to threesomes, foursomes, you name it. There wasn’t one thing that this dude had not done. It made Hyunjin nervous. Seeing the way Minho treated other girls made his skin crawl. He didn’t want you to be just a number on his list. You were naive, Hyunjin knew that. He always knew that you always saw the best in people. It was one of the many things he adored about you, but in this current moment, it was making his heart sink. He wasn’t sure why; he wasn’t sure if it was jealousy or Minho’s arrogant agenda, but he was definitely feeling uneasy. 

***

The usual ice droplets that soaked your body felt like fire. Hyunjin was always touchy feely, but the way he had been with you the past couple of days was affecting you so much more than it usually did. The thought alone made you feel lightheaded. A large sigh came as your body pressed up against the glass frame. Your frustration was growing, and you weren’t sure how much longer you could keep these Hyunjin fantasies in your head. 

Stepping out of the shower, you wiped the fogginess sticking to the mirror. Pushing your hair back, you looked at yourself for what felt like a really long time. Nerves began to bundle in your stomach. Something about tonight was different. It began to feel a different way. Your chest jumped at the possibility of something finally happening with him. 

“Pfft who am i kidding,” you yelled at yourself in the mirror, pushing your nose up against the foggy glass, “keep dreaming girl.”

Wrapping your towel around your naked torso, you walked out to the kitchen, finding a few snacks too much on. You had time to procrastinate getting ready. Turning on the tv, you happily munched away, enjoying your favorite show, Jane the virgin. The previous bundle of nerves dissipated as you let yourself sink into the couch. Going out with the boys was nothing out of the ordinary, but the tensions between you and Hyunjin felt the highest it had ever been. What was worse was that it wasn’t the first time that the atmosphere had been intense.

***

“Oooo,” Hyunjin yelled, quickly snatching your phone from your grasp, “who is this you're talking to now.”

“HYUNJIN IT’S NO ONE,” you screamed, standing up in front of him, “can you mind your business?” 

The swipe across his hands to get your phone back failed, causing him to begin running around the apartment, simultaneously scrolling your messages. Sure you entertained other guys from time to time. However, none of them made you feel hot the way hyunjin did. It was practically impossible. Even looking at Hyunjin made you feel like exploding on the spot.

Following his charade of nonsense, frustration began to grow. Chasing him around the house was no easy task. He was fast and flexible. There was no way you would be able to catch him. Coming to a stand still, you sighed.

“Hyunjin please,” you whined, waiting for him to come out of hiding, “if you give me my phone back, i’ll tell you.”

A loud gasp left your lips when you felt him from behind. Hands pinned to your sides, Hyunjin used his force, pinning you against the wall adjacent to your previous stance. Sticking his lips out, he chuckled, blowing the hair that was covering his gently frustrated eyes burning down on you. Nerves were setting in, especially once his cocky smirk began to form on his yet to be touched lips. Letting a hand roam, your mind was becoming dizzy, unable to control what your body was doing. That could’ve explained how your fingertips were spread across his clean chest, nearly half the buttons on his shirt somehow were undone. Were they already like that? Did you do it? You weren’t able to comprehend the situation at hand.

“Y/n,” he paused, “baby. Why are you talking to other guys?”

You could feel the lump forming at your throat. Intimidation was creeping in, lingering the longer he kept his hungry eyes on you.

“W-what do you mean?”

“Come on,” Hyunjin huffed, swiftly dragging his fleshy thumb across your bottom lip, “you don't need other guys. I’m right here.”

***

“What do you wanna eat?”

Minho's presence was putting Hyunjin off guard. All of his thoughts led to you right now. 

“Uh, I don't mind, it's up to you,” he mumbled. He could feel the blood running through his body becoming warmer with each passing second. Opening the door to the apartment made him nervous suddenly. Especially when he opened the door to you in nothing but a petite towel.

“Y/n?”

“Hey hyunjin-”

You spun around, tripping over the carpet in front of you.

“Oh.. Minho’s here too,” you stated, praying to the gods that you were still fully covered. Minho’s facial expressions conformed to those of concern as soon as your body hit the ground. Finger tips traveling to your legs, slowly up your arms, landing on your cheek.

“Holy shit y/n, are you okay?”

“Uh yeah,” you smiled, “I’m fine.”

Helping you up from the floor, Minho reciprocating the innocent smile. You sent a hard glare at Hyunjin after, causing hyunjin to huff, loud. Saying nothing, he walked straight out the fridge, finding any possible beer that was in sight, and, well, sculling it. 

“Hyunjin,” you yelled, running over, one hand keeping your towel secure, the other hitting him on the back, “what are you doing? We haven’t even eaten yet!”

“What,” he hissed, making you uncomfortably step away, “are you my mom?”

“No,” you replied back harshly, eyebrows furrowing at the way he was speaking to you all of a sudden, “God, what’s with the sulky attitude?”

You reached passed, purposefully brushing your barely covered chest across his torso, reaching for a chocolate bar.

“Minho,” you called, keeping your gaze fixated up at Hyunjin, “do you wanna come help me pick an outfit for tonight?”

The question made Hyunjin crush the now empty beer can in his grip. 

“Uh sure,” Minho answered, somewhat courteous about the interaction the two of you just had. He followed you to your room, looking forward to the way you were about to try on these outfits just for him.

“Okay so,” you began, “I have two,” you paused, making sure you were loud enough for the Hyunjin to hear, “you can sit here, and I'll go and quickly change into the first one.”

The look on Minho’s face was delectable. Like he was a kid in a candy store. Placing your fingers on his chest, you gave him a soft nudge, making him fall and lay back on your bed. You turned to your wardrobe, making sure to cautiously bend over and pick out the first outfit. You looked back at him as you walked out the door. The way he spread his legs right open, waiting in anticipation for you was fucking hot. 

A sigh of relief escaped your chest as you closed the bathroom door, finally able to drop this irritating towel and put some actual clothes on. This moment gave you a minute of peace, thinking about what you were actually doing. Harmlessly playing around with Minho to make Hyunjin jealous. Would it even work? Usually it was something you would question and/or doubt. However, it did not matter right now. Whether it made him envious or not, you were sick of having hopes that something would happen. Minho was very attractive, and he had shown previous interest in you before. A little fun wouldn’t hurt right.

“Y/n?”

You rolled your eyes hearing Hyunjin’s voice and knocked at the door. Shimmying into your dress, you sighed, opening the door for him.

“What do you want?”

“Nothing,” he paused, hesitating, “I’m sorry for acting the way I did just before.”

You said nothing, instead, letting him walk in while you began to do your makeup.

“I just don’t understand why you think you can talk to me like that, especially in front of your friends?”

“Because, uh, well.”

You huffed at his hesitation to answer.

“Of course you don't kno-”

His actions spoke louder than words, as they were pinning you up against the glass shower frame. You could feel the magnitude of shivers fall through your spine, yet your skin felt hot, especially in the place he was touching you.

“I do know,” he answered, eyes burning. He sighed, running a frustrated hand through his blacked locks.

“What do you know,” you smirked, looking up at him, bringing a hand around his neck, “tell me.”

The intensity had never been so heavy. Standing there in dead silence, eyes pouring into each other. Inches apart. It could be so easy for you to just reach up and finally, maybe finally, let yourself experience the feeling of those damn lips brushing your wanting ones. You could picture how this ended in your head right now. Legs wrapped around his torso, lips tickling your neck. Hell, you could even somehow reach around and just turn the shower on, give you not only a reason to be naked, but another reason as to why this should happen; right here, right now.

“Y/n, are you okay,” Minho yelled, making you break away from Hyunjin, “you’ve been in there for a long time just to put some clothes on.”

Brushing yourself off, you left Hyunjin to himself, absolutely gobsmacked like nothing had ever happened. He could do nothing, but walk out and see you standing in front of his best friend. Dressing up for him. Showing off for him. Saying that it made Hyunjin’s blood boil was an understatement.

“Wow,” Minho hummed in approval, “spin around for me princess.”

You did as you were told, allowing his eyes to linger on your figure. All Hyunjin could do was just stand in the hallway, jaw dropped. His brain was ringing with anger. Storming off, all he could do was look into the fridge, quickly sipping on another beer can.

Finally stepping out of your room with Minho, Hyunjin huffed, barely paying attention to him. But when he saw you, he could feel the tent in his pants beginning to form. Tight black dress, long hair cascading down your shoulders. You looked perfect to him.

“Ready to go Hyunjin?”

He blinked a few times.

“Um, yeah I am.”

“Good,” you smirked, grabbing Minho's arms and wrapping them around your torso.

***

The music was blaring through the speaker system as you barely stood at the bar, chugging down the 5th round of shots Chan had bought for all of you.

“To friendship!” he yelled.

“Friendship,” you slurred in response, humming at the way the liquid burned your chest. It’s painful the  first time, but after the 5th one, it's the fiery sensation that you want nothing more than to feel again. Everyone was loud and fun, having their time of life. Except for Hyunjin of course, silently sipping on his drink in the corner. You stumbled over to him, somewhat heavily slapping him on the shoulder.

“Hyunjin,” you smiled, feeling your eyes get smaller, “what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“But you aren't acting like the Hyunjin that I know.”

You pouted, digging your index fingers into his chest.

“Nothing,” he snapped, “I’m fine.”

His response made you pissed off to say the least. But giving him a good scolding or fighting him was not even worth your energy. Why was he being so sulky? He was the one who pushed you against any hard surface whenever he was mad. The one who teased you with massages, lingering gazes, sinful touches. The thoughts of those many moments became a sudden sensory overload. You hurried away, quickly grabbing Minho's wrist and dragging him to the dance floor.

“Dance with me,” you whispered, grabbing his wrist and placing them on your sides as you turned to face away from him. Closing your eyes, you let the music pour into you, head lying in the crook on Minho’s neck as you let your body explore him. The satisfactory groans that left his lips and slipped into your ears felt like paradise. It felt so good, feeling someone finally reciprocate their interest in you. His grip on you was strong, thumb digging into your sides as he pulled you close, letting you feel his hard on from behind you. A deep hum left your throat, making him smile against your lobe.

“Feeling okay baby?”

“Mmmm yeah,” you chuckled, “I can tell you are.”

The deepness in your voice made him spin around. You threw your head back in satisfaction, allowing his lips to cover your neck in delicate, feverish kisses. Wrapping your arms around his neck made him chuckle, allowing him to pull you even closer than before. He wasn’t shy, that’s for sure. You shivered, feeling the hard grip he had on your left thigh, hooking it around and lifting your leg around him. You looked up at him, seeing the darkness pooling behind his eyes as he told you to jump, allowing him to carry you. Your hands were in the air, completely loose and carefree as you continued to sway to the beat of the music. This was the first time you had felt so light. Everything felt so easy at this moment. Minho was giving you the attention you had been craving from Hyunjin for so long. You looked down at him, the previous dark facade long gone as he looked up at you with nothing but joy and admiration present. It made you smile. 

“Y/n,” he yelled, bringing you back to his level, “let’s go sit at the bar, I want to ask you something.”

You didn’t complain, trailing him out of the human traffic of the bar. ‘Of course,’ you muttered to yourself, seeing the only two available stools being right next to hyunjin and some random girl that he was feeling up under the table. You rolled your eyes; of course he was entertaining someone else. You ignored him, putting a gentle hand on Minho's thigh.

“Did you say something?”

“Yeah,” he grinned, “did you want another drink?”

“Oh uhm, can you just get me some water please?”

“A-anything for you baby.”

You couldn’t help but giggle, not noticing till now how sloshed he really was. The two of you sat in comfortable silence, patiently waiting for the drinks he had ordered. You let your fingers linger on him, drawing sloppy lines along his inner thigh.

“So,” he began, taking a sip of his drink in between speech, “there’s actually something I wanted to ask you.”

“You did say this from what I recall,” you laughed, scratching your head with your index finger; an attempt at acting puzzled in front of him.

“Yes,” he smirked, placing a hand on the outer edge of your knee, “I wanted to ask if you wanted to go out on a date with me next week?”

His question knocked the alcohol right out of your system, completely sobering you up. You fixed your posture, slight panic settling into your body at his sudden question. It was just fun, wasn’t it? Just using him to make Hyunjin jealous? 

“Um wow,” you gasped, unsure what to say, “this is, well, um, I don't really know what to say.”

“What do you mean?”

Small dribbles of sweat began tapping on your forehead. Pushing your hair behind your ear, you lifted your hand, placing it apologetically over his.

“Minho,” you empathetically smiled, “I think that’s so sweet of you.”

You paused, quickly seeing the way the grin on his face began to turn down.

“And don't get me wrong, you’re a great guy and you have been nothing but sweet to me. But, I, well, I have feelings for someone else.”

The look on his face made you devastated. The hurt was evident in his eyes. Minho grabbed his drink, taking a big swig from it.

“Please say something,” you pleaded, beginning to feel uncomfortable from the painful silence.

“It’s fine.”

Heart beat beginning to race, you could feel it; the sudden change in atmosphere between the two of you.

“It is? Okay good because-”

“It’s fine because I was joking.”

A heavy pang hit you in the chest. Did you even hear him correctly?

“What?”

He looked up at you, a slight chuckle came from him.

“Oh, you thought I was being serious?”

He grabbed you by the wrist, picking it up and pushing it off of him.

“You weren’t being serious?”

“Of course not,” he snapped, “you think I would wanna be with you?”

“Well why would you ask me out if you didn’t feel that way?”

He took another swig.

“Yeah well whatever, it’s a mistake. I can barely even look at you.”

You stood up, blood beginning to boil now. 

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

He rolled his eyes, following you and standing over you.

“Do I have to spell it out for you? I wouldn’t go near you with a ten foot poll. Let alone fuck you? Pfft, your dreaming girl; good luck with that.”

You felt dizzy, unable to comprehend what Minho had just said to you. ‘What a dick’ you thought, before lifting your hand and slapping him across the face. You could feel the tear prick your eyes. You just wanted to fall, break down on the spot. No one had ever said such hurtful things to you before. Hyunjin turned around as soon as he heard the sound. You didn’t want to look at him. You were fuming. Minho just stood there, laughing at you.

“Listen here,” you snapped, “I get that you’re upset that your advances didn’t work, but you have no fucking right to say that to me, or anyone, ever again. Unless you apologise, I never want to speak to you ever again.”

And with that, you picked yourself up, and walked out of there, alone.

*** 

You couldn’t feel anything but the painful throb in the back of your head as you rose out of bed. Taking your phone off the charger you gasped, seeing the multiple missed calls Hyunjin had left you last night. You threw your phone back onto your bed, sheepishly making your way to the kitchen.

“Hey babes.”

You looked up to see a dishevelled Hyunjin waiting for you at the bench. You tried to smile at him, hide the pain of what Minho had said to you last night. Your heart was hurting, so bad. It was hard not to believe what he had said to you. You just wanted to run into Hyunjin's arms, let him whisper sweet nothings and tell you everything was okay; but you knew that if that happened, you would never let him go.

“Morning,” you mumbled, turning your back to him as you turned on the coffee machine, “how are you feeling this morning?”

“Yeah I'm good,” he mumbled back slowly making his way over to you. You sighed, a sharp inhale as you felt his arms wrap you from behind. Luckily, his head was resting on your back; he wasn’t able to see the impulsive tears slip from your eyes.

“Are you feeling okay after last night?”

Your heart sank. Humiliation was settling in; he had heard exactly what he said. It felt like you couldn't breathe. You were gasping for air. Hyunjin grabbed your waist, spinning you around, encompassing you in his embrace. He could feel you. The way your body sobbed against him. Hands against your chest, head curled into his neck. Holding it in was impossible, especially from Hyunjin. He knew you like the back of his hand.

“My angel,” he whimpered, cupping your cheeks and looking down at you, “I’m so sorry about what happened last night. I want you to know that none of what he said is true. You are such a beautiful person inside and out, and you didn't deserve that.”

You finally fixed your gaze back onto him. You had never seen such softness to his eyes before. You felt yourself giving  yourself to him. Vulnerability glowing in your heart as you felt yourself slipping away. His touch on you became stronger, hypnotising almost. Your hands found their way onto his body, unsafely creeping under his shirt and messily being dragged across his stomach. The front he attempted to put on was priceless; you could feel his body tensing underneath your corrupt touch.

“y/n,” he paused, slowly taking his hand from your body that he so desperately dreamed about, “I have to, uh,  go to class, but we can talk about this when I get back.”

Hyunjin sloppily grabbed his back and stumbled out the door, leaving you utterly speechless. It was the first time you could sense his nerves from something you did. A frustrated sigh left your lips. Nails digging into your palms, you stormed to your room, slamming the door behind you. 

“God,” you growled, aggressively falling onto your bed. Your eyelids suddenly felt heavy, but your mind was nonstop. 

The possibilities of finally having him was on a constant loop. The way his pupils changed when he looked at you. The shiver you could feel when you touched him. The ideas of what could have happened if Hyunjin didn’t leave was driving you up the wall. His voice played in your head, as if he was right next to you, whispering the praising words you longed to hear. A moan slipped from your lips, hands now sliding down the sides of your body as your mind became more vivid. The ache between your legs becomes stronger with each drawn out breath. You chuckled, replacing the ache with the thought of Hyunjin's tongue. You sat up, quickly stripping down to under garments. You took a quick look at yourself in the mirror; leaving you feeling anything but delirious.

You bit down on your bottom lip, letting your hands roam once more. Feeling the heat dance across your cheeks, you giggled, making yourself nervous at the thought of his summery breath cascade down your neck, blonde tips to follow. It’s like he was an island of fantasy and desire. All you could do was touch yourself. Letting your fingertips under the hem of your panties and into your folds. A sigh of relief slipping as you felt your legs become weak, falling back once more at the already immense pleasure you got from yourself. This was your way to reach the destination. The island of fantasy; desire; Hyunjin. Your stomach tensed at his name. The smile on your face could not be wiped off at any moment. Eyes closed, you could finally picture it. Hyunjin standing over you, a sadistic yet admirable facial expression hijacking his features, wishing that his lips were on your clit instead of your fingers.

“Baby,” you groaned, “Hyunjin, touch me.”

The slight cringe entering your mind at the way your voice broke at his name. ‘God how pathetic,’ you thought to yourself. He wasn’t even there and the effect he had on you was that strong. You continued your playful assault, teasing yourself at your entrance. Index finger gently prodding, you became dizzy. You were already close. The cause as to why was unknown. Were you really that good at touching yourself? Definitely not, the manifestation of every single thought of him was coming together, almost becoming overwhelming. 

“Hyunjin,” you choked, “I just want to be such a good girl for you. Please let me-”

“You wanna be a good girl for me, don't you baby?”

Your neck snapped, eyes widening at hyunjin staring down at you. 

“H-hyunjin,’ you stuttered, grabbing your pillow and covering yourself, “I c-can explain, I-”

“Shut the fuck up,” he retorted. He said nothing, tucking his hair behind his ear as he began to undo the buttons on his shirt. There was nothing you could do, but, well, stare. You propped yourself onto your elbows, feeling him wrap his arms around your torso, gently pressing your lips to every inch of his skin marked in ink. Hyunjin’s gaze was strong, never leaving your eyes as his smirk grew wider. Things were moving slow, way too slow for both of your liking. 

“You like what you see?”

“Please,” you scoffed, leaning your chin onto his stomach, “it’s nothing I haven’t seen before.”

The look in his face was priceless. Smirk rapidly dissipating from his lips; he was pissed. It was obvious. Jaw clenched, tightly gripped fists. Something you had never seen before on him. You looked down, noticing the purple covering his knuckles. You grabbed his hand, panic settling in you.

“Hyunjin what the fuck happened are you okay?”

He said nothing, ripping his hand from your grip and dropping to his knees. The smirk obviously returned at the way your legs involuntarily spread for him.

“Oh, this,” he questioned, flexing them out in front of you, “this is what happens what you’re a fucking dick to my princess.”

His fingertips traced your hem, violently teasing you. You lifted your hips, attempting to have 

Hyunjin’s fingers ‘accidentally’ slip over your clothed core. But he chuckled, hooking his arms around your legs and pushing them down, giving you no room to squirm. He chuckled; the level of power he had over you was something he had dreamt of. He began to chuckle; he couldn’t help it.

“Fuck y/n,” he groaned, snaking one hand from under your leg and onto your panties, sending a noticeable shiver down your legs, “you dont know how many times i’ve dreamt of this. Seeing you like this, all hot and bothered under me.”

You couldn’t help but groan at his words, feeling the edge of his middle finger press against your hidden clit.

“Fuck,” you mumbled, already on the brim of feeling overwhelmed.

“Am I making you too hot baby,” he pouted, increasing the pressure on your soft spot, “you like how I talk dirty like that about you?”

“Mhm,” is all you could manage to stumble out. Your body began to squirm, making Hyunjin smile at you. His hand trailed on your folds, gently travelling back to your hem of what felt like suffocating clothing covering your heat. Muffling groans escaped your lips, frustrated at how slowly he took them off. The way his pupils dilated was like a kid in a candy store. Tucking his hair behind his ear, he inched closer, lips moments away from having him where you needed the most. You let your eyes flutter shut, anticipating the moment you had been waiting for. Confusion hit when you felt hands balancing on either side of you, soulful kisses trailing up the center of your body until you opened your eyes, seeing his regard fixated, looking down into yours. You felt like a feather, his body hovered over you as he leaned closer, finally connecting his lips to yours. It was sloppily, lips out of time and teeth clashing. Not the kiss you expected, but you couldn't complain. Hyunjin slipped his tongue into your mouth, tongues colliding as he erupted a delirious fire inside of you. Your bodies began to collide, passions electrifying, lighting up the room as his hands wrapped around your hips, thumb kneading at your bones as your hands dug into his neck. Things were going slow before, but there were no more concerns about the pace now. Hyunjin’s lips were always nice to look at, but the way they felt was a whole different story. The cloud-like texture of them was making your head move in nothing but circles. You were in heaven, already thinking about how they would feel against your skin in other places you had become desperate fir. Such thoughts were interrupted when you felt him leaving your lips, sucking hard on your bottom lip. His eyes lingered on you, chest heaving, breath heavy as he lifted you up, tossing your, compared to his, small frame. A look of innocence played on your feature as Hyunjin pinned both of your hands above your head. 

“Hyunjin what are you doi-”

“Shhh baby,” he hissed, crawling back to face level, tilting his head to reach your ear, “don't move okay, I’m gonna make you feel so good,” he paused, pressing a kiss to your lobe, “just like the million times I imagined it.”

A satisfied whine left your lips as Hyunjin created a new trail, stopping at your neck. You wrapped a hand around his neck, wanting to push his lips into your skin more.

“Uh uh baby,” he chuckled, pinning your hands back to the ordered position, “be a good girl and keep them up there for me won't you?”

“Yes sir” you mumbled, a low hum of approval heard from him. He continued his savoury touches, harshly sucking on any skin above your chest that was left unmarked. His fervent touches were making you increase in sensitivity with each moment passing. A hand hooked around your back, effortlessly unclasping your bra and letting your breasts become exposed.

“Fuck,” he sighed, hunger increasing, “has anyone ever told you that you were made like a piece of fucking art?”

The compliment made you blush, hard. No one had ever said such complimentary things before.

“Uhm, no,” you whispered, scared that someone would hear you. Hyunjin frowned, eyes becoming hard as he looked up at you.

“No one’s ever told you that before,” he huffed, sticking his tongue out in front of your left nipple.

“No,” you inhaled, fear engaged as Hyunjin’s shift in demeanour appeared.

“That makes me so fucking mad,” he growled, attaching his lips to your nipple, “you’re the sexiest fucking girl ive ever seen y/n.” 

A choked whine left your lips at his words, and his tongue trapped around you, hands flicking the other.

“Fuck Hyunjin I-”

“Unfuckable,” he interjected, “how can you be when you fucking look like a piece of fucking art?”

He refused to rest. His fingers began to trail, teasingly grazing your sides as he let them travel, stopping right on top of where you wanted him the most.

“I had to add to the artwork that is you baby.”

He had now lowered himself back to his starting position. On his knees, lips in line with your pussy as he let a finger slips between your folds, your stomach jolting with electricity at the light, yet tantalising feeling he gave you.

“The marks all over your chest,” he puffed, almost like he was out of breath from just looking at you, “they are nothing but little flowers I added to a beautiful canvas.”

You could barely think about what he was saying as he pushed the finger into your entrance, a high pitched mewl coming from your chest as he began to pump.

“God Hyunjin-”

“Tell me princess,” he interrupted, adding another finger, “tell me all the dirty things you’ve wanted me to do to you.”

“Fuck,” you groaned. The cocky smirk on Hyunjin’s face, lips slightly agape,”there’s so many times when I have thought about you.”

“Tell me baby,” he groaned, letting his breath tickle the skin on your inner thigh.

“In the shower, on the kitchen bench, the couch in the living room. You doing me from behind, on top, letting me ride you,” you moaned, “but this, right now, this is my favorite.”

A grunt of thrill left his lips, an attempt and analysing the many thoughts you had about him made him feel completely justified. On the brink of pure anger, you thrusted forward, barely feeling the impact of his lips on your folds. 

“Shhh,” he whispered, curling his fingers, forcing you to lay still, “let me allow your fantasy to become a reality.”

A loud groan left your chest as Hyunjin finally allowed his tongue to plunge into you, harshly grazing your clit. The feeling made your body jolt, jaw fully lax as he your gave yourself to him. Hands running straight into his hair, you gasped, seeing him notice the way you constantly push the front strands his blonde locks behind his ears. 

“Fuck,” he mumbled against you, quickly sitting up, “this fucking hair is too long.”

Your legs shut, too weak to keep them open as Hyunjin frustratedly fisted his hair and teethed the string off his wrist, wrapping his hair into a high ponytail, front pieces gently left out, sprawling across his glistening face. As soon as he looked down, he couldn’t help but chuckle. Manhandling your delicate thighs, he bit down on his lips, aggressively spreading them open to regain his access to your sweet spot.

“Already so weak are we?”

You couldn’t help but feel humiliated as he kept his gaze on you, unforgivingly, letting his tongue rapidly circle around your clit. 

“Oh my god,” you managed to stagger out, another hum of approval entering your heat, vibrating and spreading to the rest of your body. God he was so good at this. Always making you feel good. Like you were the number one princess in the best castle. Even if it wasn’t sex, Hyunjin always found a way to make you feel better. But this. This was a whole new level of pleasure.

“Mhmm,” he grunted, replacing his tongue with a finger from his opposite hand, “how close are you baby?”

The clench around his fingers was enough, Hyunjin slightly amused. The combinations of the multitude of fingers and his extremely rough tongue on your clit was sending you to another dimension.

“Far out I knew I was good at this, but baby, you’re so easy to make cum.”

“N-no im not,” you whined, Hyunjin throwing his head pack in pure joy.

“It’s okay baby,” he cooed, picking up the pace of his fingers, “you don't have to put on a front for me.”

“Hyunjin c-cum,” you gasped, barely able to strangle anything out of your lips, “g-gon-na c-cum.”

“Yeah? You’re gonna cum for me?”

“Yeah.”

“You wanna cum for me baby?”

“Y-yeah I do.”

“Come on baby,” he growled, “cum for me like the good girl you are.”

His words couldn’t help but send you over the edge, strangled echoes of pleasure filling the room as he continued his pleasurable assault, loving the way your hips convulsed against his overstimulation.

“Fucking hell,” you cried, pushing his fingers out of you, “you made me cum so hard Hyunjin.”

He smiled, crawling back onto your bed, towering over you once more.

“There’s nothing else I want to do in this world apart from make you feel good baby.”

You couldn’t help but giggle, leaning into his lips to taste your sweet filled juices glistening his chin. The kiss was gentle, soothing from the intense orgasm you had just come down from. He created another trail, tongue dragging across your neck and back down to your chest, pressing an arousing kiss in between your breasts.

“I can't help it,” he smirked, “I just want to wanna mark you all over, let Minho know that you’re mine.”

His words made you feel light headed. Mine? Usually something like that made you wanna throw up. But the way Hyunjin said it, with so much hunger and vice, it was like you became bound to him. Anything he wanted to do with you would be impossible to say no.

“Then f-fuck me,” you mumbled.

“What was that?”

You slipped from underneath him, turning him around and pushing him onto the bed, hands firmly placed against his chest as you climbed on top of him. Hyunjin’s eyes became full. Full of fire, lust, hunger, anger. He played it cool at first, but now, now he was desperate. You let your hands now travel his body, one hand tracing the outline of his abs, the other behind you, palming his rapidly hardening cock.

“Fuck me like you own me, Like you want everyone to know I’m yours.”

The words were enough to send him into a craze. He quickly rid himself of the draw string, keeping a tight grip on his sweats, pushing down his pants to his knees. It came to your surprise when he had nothing else on, leaving him to follow your pursuit of complete nakedness. You lifted your hips off of his stomach, readjusting to let your clit sit on top of his pulsating cock that was lying flat against his stomach. A sharp inhale came from his chest, absolutely frothing at the way you rubbed your wetness against him.

“Fuck you’re so wet still,” Hyunjin chuckled, a deep grunt escaping leaving him.

“You like that?” You smirked, biting down on your bottom lip.

“Yeah baby,” he moaned, hands gripping your ass, giving you a soft blow. His hands were soft, icy, goosebumps becoming visible as you leaned back, gripping the base of his cock. the air was becoming desperate, and so were you. If you had a cent for every time you thought about this very moment, you’d be riding him in the royal palace.

A wave of goosebumps charged onto your skin as you lifted your hips. Hyunjin’s hands scattered over your ass, he helped guide you, excruciatingly slowly as your hand kept him still, allowing his cock to become buried inside of you. A groan of relief escaped each other’s lips as your walls became stretched, body feeling numb already. He was a big boy, causing your head to fall onto his chest. you needed time to adjust to the slight ache his length gave you, but you weren’t complaining. As soon as you bounced up and off of him, you felt as if your hole was whimpering, already desperate for him to be back inside of you. you continued with a light bounce, barely fitting any of him inside of you. 

“Fuck,” he mumbled, tightening his grip on you, “go deeper.”

You did as you were told, increasing the intensity, sitting back up and letting your hips freely roll onto him. Your mouth became heavily agape, an open invitation for Hyunjin to shove his fingers inside. your eyes became closed, fingers wrapped around his wrist as you lapped his digits with thick saliva.  The way you effortlessly took his heavenly inked fingers made his head spin.

“you’re such a good girl,” he smirked in between throwing his head back, “i bet Minho would be fucking dying for this kinda treatment.”

The mention of his name was a slight bruise to your ego; nonetheless, it simultaneously gave you motivation, determination to prove what he had been missing out on this whole time. How he would dangle girls in front of your face at any moment. How he teased you to no end almost every single day. Everything was coming out, and it was completely out of your control.

“Far out Hyunjin,” you hissed, ripping his fingers from your mouth, “why are you so obsessed with Minho right now?”

“Because,” he grunted, wrapping his saturated fingers around your neck, “he fucking pissed me off last night, and this morning.”

The sudden connection in your brain became apparent. All thoughts leading to the possibility of Hyunjin punching him made you lose control. So much control that you couldn't recall hyunjin flipping your over, his figure menacingly towering over you as he began to thrust.

“I fuck you so much better than Minho could,” he grunted again, left thumb gently attacking your left nipple, “dont you think?”

You could barely respond. Nothing but a suffocating moan spilled from your throat as his grip on you became tighter. You were on the brink of actually losing your mind. The way Hyunjin filled you up was just, well, indescribable. He just continued, letting the now continuous beads of condensation from his forehead spread across your stomach. 

“Say it,” he growled, a slight punishment created at the way he left nothing but the tip of him inside of you, “tell me i'm better than him.”

“Fuck,” you whined, attempting to sink your hips further down his length. But hyunjin knew better; he was one step ahead. Your desperate, pathetic attempt of getting out of your retribution was nothing but a joke to him. 

Hyunjin scoffed, “I know you want me to fill you up again, but I need to know.” 

His voice was the deepest you had ever heard him speak. The hand that was previously wrapped around your neck had escaped, a tremble that was clear as crystal running down your torso at the feeling of the multitude of Hyunjin’s ice cold rings dragging across your skin.

“You-you’re better than h-him,” you stuttered, trying to gain your previously hindered consciousness from his strop grip, “better than Minho.”

The words alone made him groan. He sure did like to tease you, but even he couldn't keep it up. Your voice became electrifying in his mind, igniting him as rammed his cock back into you; no hesitation. His pace was unforgiving. The lewd sound of skin slapping filling the room at a sound that exceeded the maximum level of decibels an individual could take.

“That’s right I am,” hyunjin moaned, “that fucking piece of shit.”

Your head rolled from side to side, a hand violently gripping your bed sheet. Like your mind went numb, your senses could only follow. Nothing but the scent of Hyunjin’s heat occupying your nose, the sound of skin slapping filling your ears, and your vision hypnotised by the darkness that pooled behind his eyes.

“Mhm fucking hell baby,” you groaned, arching your back, “i can feel myself getting close.”

“Tell me baby,” he chucked, bringing his thumb dangerously close to your clit. You brought your fingertips high, gripping his wrist before he could make a decision that you know would make you fall off the edge and into the black hole that would be your orgasm.

“What is it baby,” he whined, tone laced with concern, “scared that you’re gonna cum already?”

“Yes,” you blurred out, “just a little longer please.”

“And why should i?”

All you could feel was your eyes locking shut, fingers spreading you open and touching any every sensitive skin he could get his hand on. He had transformed into satan. hard thrusts and a heavy hand; you could feel yourself clenching around him as he sadistically chuckled, satisfied by the pleasuring torturing spell he had you under.

“Fuck,” you gasped out, the sound of your voice tainted as your body lunges forward with each thrust, “i’m gonna fucking cum.”

“Hh come on baby,” Hyunjin grumbled, “just a little longer for me now why don’t you?”

“Just f-for you,” you giggled, noticing the way Hyunjin heart was practically about to leap out of his chest. He was working hard to make you feel good; even if you couldn’t tell from the shimmering black ink spread across his chest and down his torso. 

“Baby are you gonna cum?”

Your throat had become empty, completely forgetful of how to speak and use your words. The continuous and uncontrollable clenching was satisfactory enough to give him the answer he needed. 

“y/n, are you gonna cum with me?”

“Please,” you whined, “cum in me, I'm begging you.”

Your words were more than enough. You hummed in satisfaction as you felt yourself slip over, feeling the warmth of his liquid inside of you. His body collapsed, falling next to you as he watched you sit up, enjoying the views of his viscosity spill out of you. You let a finger fall down, picking it up and tasting him. His jaw dropped at what he thought to be such a ludicrous act.

“Wow,” you smirked, letting your tongue sloppily wrap around your finger, “you taste so good.”

Hyunjin threw his head back on your bed, ripping out his ponytail and running his hands through it.

“far out y/n, you don’t know how many times i’ve thought about you saying that to me.”

[raeisgrayte]

Must Be Fa(e)te~ Chapter One

There was a fable my mother used to tell me all the time when I was a little girl. It was about a regal queen, a noble monarch who lead her people with pride, though I always thought the princess was my favorite character. She was a warrior who fought in the great war against the human realm. She was someone who stood up for what she thought was right, like fighting against the humans polluting the beautiful springs that the merfolk of Wellspring lived in. The best part about the princess though, was her rainbow wings. My mother told of how the princess only used them when absolutely necessary. She was more of a walking girl, she liked taking walks through the forest's abundant beauty. She was magical, too magical. That's how I knew my mom was making this up as she went.

I only wish it were true, then maybe I could actually blame a real life person for making me the homosexual I am today. Instead when people ask about my "awakening" I have to tell them I fell in love with a made-up fairy princess when I was 3. Usually they giggle and agree that they knew it at a young age too, but some want to know more about the story. I always tell them, it's a good story after all. It leaves my lips turned up in a smile afterwards, thinking about magic and gay shit.

God how I yearn for some excitement around this town. We all just walk around with somewhere to go. I never saw someone stop by to smell the roses unless they were with a loved one. I let out a large sigh, putting my left hand on the wooden counter in my grandfather's pop up flower shop, Love You Florever. It was a play on the word floral, but I think everyone I tell about the flower shop understands, I just want to make sure. There are the people who give me a strange look and then those who seem genuinely happy that my grandfather was such a punster. I miss him.

I hear the ding of the bell before I can go into one of those really sad moments where I start thinking about all the lovely memories I had with my grandad. I will not be having a sad montage in my head today! Not after what happened last time. I'm still stuck in my thoughts, trying to be funny, when I hear someone clear their throat. I cringe at how awkward I must look right now laughing at my own jokes, inside my head. "Ahaha, heyyyyyy, welcome to Love You Florever! Would you like to-" My brain short circuits when I finally meet the gaze of the goddess who has stepped foot into the shop. Oh lawdy I'm about to faint. She has beautiful almond brown eyes with a mole under her left eye. I'm drawn to the envious length of her lashes and how they brush gently against her cheeks as she blinks. She has short ebony hair that shimmers in the setting sunlight. Her lips curve up in a smile and she tilts her head curiously.

"Would I like to what?" She teases, a small laugh leaving her mouth. That's it, I give up. If there is a God I'm coming to visit you real soon. This girl was beautiful and her voice is so smooth I thought my brain was oozing out of my ears. I feel my face start to flush from embarrassment.

"Oh-um, sorry. I have trouble thinking sometimes." I laugh and scratch the back of my neck nervously.

"Like a medical thing?" She questions, her eyes flashing with concern like she had offended me. My eyes go wide and I shoot out my hand shaking it in a 'no' manor.

"No no no no, oh god no! You're fine, I  mean like my brain just-" I hit my head softly to insinuate that I'm just a dumb gay bitch, "you know, doesn't work? Especially around pretty women- I mean," I drag my hand down my face. "Fuck." I whisper through gritted teeth. This makes her laugh loudly, so much that she wipes her eyes. She lays a hand down on the counter and grins at me.

"Thank you and I totally get the whole brain malfunction thing." She smirks as her eyes search my face. I feel like she's trying to indirectly tell me something. After an awkward amount of silence she bends her other hand at the wrist in the viral tik-tok "hey I'm gay" gesture. If this were a movie I'd look into the camera as everything pauses and I'd say oh my god, a gay.

I shake my head in understanding now. "Ah." I squeeze my eyes shut and let out a small chuckle. "I'm so sorry, um, would you like to buy anything?" I ask with a smile. I was running the store after all. I had to try to make some money. Her lips lift in a big smile and she suddenly looks nervous.

"Well, actually I came in here because you were the only flower I saw in here." First off, rude. She covers her face as a blush starts to form. Second of all, awww. I didn't really know what to say. I mean I could tell she was trying to hit on me, but her game was a little off. We'd just met and I don't know if she's a killer or something- oh who am I kidding?

"Oh really? That sounds about right to me." I smile as her face lights up.

"Oh gosh! I was so nervous but also confident that you weren't straight. I was so scared that I had misjudged you and there would be this whole thing-" Bo Burnham's Welcome to the Internet starts playing and I scramble to find my phone. I look at her apologetically as I finally find my phone buzzing in my back pocket. I see that it's my mom calling me, she knows I'm working the store today. I instantly answer it and turn away from the girl.

"Ello stinky, what are you doing calling me at work?" I ask in a posh British accent. I wait for my mom to reply, but all I hear is silence. Oh my goodness, did she butt dial me? "Mom? Are you there?" A whisper of anxiety drips into my stomach.

"Oralee, did you use my shampoo?" The sound of her voice calms the panic and I roll my eyes simultaneously. Funny how that works. Her shampoo?

"Are you talking about when I took a shower this morning? The strawberry stuff?" I question. I can almost hear my mother's annoyed groan.

"Yes the strawberry stuff, you know I'm going on a date tonight. My hair has to smell like strawberries! You know this." I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose.

"I didn't know you were going on a date tonight. When did that happen? I thought you were done with men and no I didn't use your shampoo." I reply curtly. I hear some shuffling around in the background and then it clears.

"Listen you know I haven't been getting any-"

"Mom! Oh my god! Shut up shut up!" I yell into the phone. I shudder with disgust at the thought of my mom speaking like she was a teen again. I hear her laughing at my pain and I almost hang up. "I cannot believe you, what is wrong with you!?"

"Hey nothing is wrong with me okay? I'm just a bisexual mother who needs two or three people to comfort me in the ways of the b o d y." She whispers the last part and I feel my whole body want to shrivel up and die.

"I cannot believe you. You're a tyrant." I hiss.

"But you love me." She quips.

"Yeah, I do. Now I have to go mom, I have a customer." I smile as I turn around.

"Ooou! Tell me all about her when you get home! Love you!" She yells and before I can ask her how she knew it was a girl she hangs up. I finally look up but the girl that was there before is now gone. I close my eyes and groan. There's goes any hope at living a happy life with a beautiful wife and a dog. I flop down in my swivel chair and continue to watch all the people walk past my beautiful flowers. Everyone was too busy getting somewhere, but I knew one day they'd rush in through my doors wanting some romantic flowers. I close my eyes and take in a deep breath. Yeah, that day will come.

+          +          +          +          +

"Lee do you like this one?" My mother holds up a small red dress with a low v-neck. Her eyebrows wiggle and I can tell she really likes this one.

"Well, let's see it on." I grin as she giddily runs into her ensuite bathroom and shuts the door. I lay back on her bed wishing I had asked that girl to wait for me to finish my phone call. Oh well, I guess it wasn't meant to be. Like most situations with girls, it never ended well for me. There was that time I had a major crush on the barista that worked in the Starbucks across the street from the shop. I convinced myself she had to be gay with how many rings and piercings she had. Turns out that was just how she liked to express herself and I learned quickly that assuming makes an ass out of you and me. You should never place feelings or sexualities on someone you don't know. You shouldn't even do that to someone you do know. Such as myself, I don't like to label myself as bisexual or lesbian, I'm more off the grid I guess. I like men okay, but then some days I will literally vomit at the thought of the male touch. It changes with the breeze to be honest. I just enjoy people's company and if something happens then I guess it does. Though, it never has. My mom has told me the day will come when I want to go serious with someone, but I'm pretty sure she was drunk when she told me that. Honestly I wish I was drunk when she told me that because then I wouldn't have to think that I'm such a failure at this romance shit.  

"So? What do we think?" Mom spins out of the bathroom and into the last bit of sunlight shining through her window. Wow, she looks absolutely gorgeous. I can't help but cover my mouth to hide the smile I have. The dress brushes at her knees and curves up her hips to support her larger than average chest.

"You look gross." I purse my lips and put on my best mean girl face on. She laughs and pushes my shoulder.

"Thanks Lee, I'll be heading out soon. Make sure you take care of Mirage, you know how she likes to let us know when we didn't feed her." I nod and watch as she goes to get ready for a night out. I didn't really care if she went out, I was used to being alone. In fact I appreciated some alone time here and there like everyone else. It was comforting to just be able to scream musical songs without the fear my mom would come join me.

"I'm going to head into my room!" I call into the bathroom. I hear her hum in acknowledgement so I turn on my heel and head towards her door. Mirage, our ragdoll cat purrs as she wraps her body around my legs, nearly tripping me. I grin and bend down to pet her. "Hey girl, you saying bye to mom too? She's going out to find some relief. She's been stressed lately for some reason, but we're going to behave and be nice to her. Right?" Mirage mews at me and I can tell there is nothing behind those eyes. She was just happy to be here. I chuckle and stroke her head. I decide to pick her up and take her with me into my room. I struggle to open my bedroom door with Mirage in my arms, but manage finally to swing open the door. I sigh as I smell the mango air freshener. I set Mirage down on my pink comforter that has a white swirling pattern. Mirage plops down with her muzzle burrowed under the blanket. I smile to myself, it's been a pretty nice Saturday.

I was about to sit down in my desk chair to chill and play some Minecraft, but I realize that I need to close my curtains or else I'm going to forget it all together and I know I'll curse myself in the morning if I don't do it now. I sigh and walk over to my two windows. The purple curtains flutter in the ac gracefully, almost like they're dancing. I grab hold of one of them ready to shut, but as I happen to look out of my window I start to notice someone in the middle of the road. A chill runs down my spin, it was creepy for someone to just be standing there. They could be waiting for someone I guess, but why in the middle of the road? There's a low feeling in the pit of my stomach, but I can't help the peak of curiosity I also feel. After all, my mother was about to go out, I want to make sure she'll be safe. It was a wonderful yet horrible thing that my curiosity would get the best of me every time. I'd so be the first one in a horror movie to just open a random door and get shanked. Anyway, that's not what we should be thinking about right now.

I pear out the glass to try and get a better look at this mystery person. I study their frame, noticing that their back is to me. I tilt my head to try and get a better look, but my eyes widen when I see what looks like them turning their head to look right at me. I audibly gasp as I stumble backwards and trip over the corner of my desk. I thud to the ground and curse under my breath. I rub my back where I hit it on my desk chair. What the fuck was that? I must be so tired I'm starting to see things. I sigh and then laugh at myself. Oralee Turner you cannot just manifest some person in the middle of the road looking right at you. Those are not good vibes. Plus you're not the main character girly, calm down. I mean sure you could be a main character if you put in a little effort but come on let's be real. You'd need to really work on the woe is me mentality. I brought out of my thoughts when I hear my mother's soothing voice behind me.

"Are you okay sweetie? I heard a noise." My mom appears in the doorway and I giggle at her frantic look. This makes her look even more worried. It's fine mom I didn't hit my head.

"Yeah I'm all good, I just need to go to bed I guess. I'm so tired I guess I forgot objects can trip me." I nod my head towards my desk. She clicks her tongue in empathy.

"Did you hurt yourself?" She leans into the room looking for any sign of injury. I shake my head slowly.

"I just bumped my back into the legs of my chair." I grimace as my back throbs.

"Oh hon, I can stay home and put some ice on that? I'll cancel my plans and we can watch a movie together." Her eyes frantically search my face for an answer.

"Mom I'm 18 years old, I think I can ice my own back, but thank you." I smile to try and calm her nerves. I want her to go out and have some fun. She deserved it. She sighs loudly and just when I think she's going to let it go there's a knock on our door. Mirage perks up and mom and I make eye contact. "Door to door service?" I smirk mischievously. I can tell she wants to say something more about our previous conversation, but another knock at the door calls her attention elsewhere.

"We'll talk more when I get home Lee." She turns to walk away but as if she has one last thing to say, she turns back. "Also, she seems like the kind of gal to walk me to her car and such. That's something you should want in someone. A lot of people don't do that now a days you just need to-"

"Mom, oh my gosh just go." I shake my head and try to shoo her away with a hand motion. She rolls her eyes but does as I suggest. I hear a distant voice and debate on meeting this mystery woman, but decide against it. I don't want to ruin the whole thing my mom probably has going. I also don't want this woman to think my mom is a- oh god- a milf. Before I can fold in on myself I hear a notification sound from my phone, which lays forgotten on my bed. "Hey Mirage would you mind growing a human hand to hand me my phone?" Mirage looks me in my eyes and as if directly telling me to fuck off, she hops off my bed and pads over to my closet. "Bitch." I grumble.

I heave myself off the ground with a grunt, only to flop myself down onto my bed. I somehow manage to grab my phone from under my leg. I wonder who would've texted me. I curiously unlock the phone and see a message from my best friend Tabitha.

Tabby: Hey! Let me know if you can make it to the party nerd!

I close my eyes and groan into my pillow. Social interactions in this day and age? No thank you. I'd rather go outside and touch some grass.

Buttface: I'm not sure if Phelo will let me :(

Tabby: You could just go anyway >:( Come on! I'll even drive you!

Buttface: I don't know Tabs, I just feel like it's going to be like last time all over again. You'll be the only one I know and you'll try to set me up with the one lesbian that'll be there. And before you say anything, no- I don't want to loose my virginty to some rando. That's not something cool I want to do.

Tabby: Oh come on that was one time and I said I was sorry :((( She won't even be here this time so you don't have to worry about spilling a drink on her again lol.

Buttface: I will kill you if you mention that once more :} Also fine, since you're a needy bitch I guess I'll stop in. When and where is it again?

Tabby: Don't worry about it, remember I said I'll pick you up! Just be ready around 6 tomorrow :)

Buttface: A Sunday night party? Really? We'll have school the next day.

Tabby: :)

God I wish she was the one with anxiety instead of me. I purse my lips as I remember how many things Tabitha has gotten me into. Like that one time she and I were walking in the park and someone yelled out that we were lesbians and she started to cry. I mean, who does that? Kind of scared me to be honest, I never want to walk with a girl anywhere ever again. Well, no that'd be a lie since women are goddesses and I am a simp.

It's then that I hear another buzz come from my phone. I almost don't look at it, I don't want Tabitha to have sent me something weird. When I look at my screen it's a message from an unknown number. I knit my brows together as I tap the message.

(xxx)xxx-xxxx: Hi, I hope this is Oralee Turner, if not that'd be awkward. You can just delete my message if you aren't her. If you are though, please respond with verification of your identity.

Verification? Who was this? How'd they get my number? This better not be another Tabitha set up. I swear one day I'm going to lock that girl in a room with some random guy I find on the street. I will actually not be doing that because men are scary, especially those who you don't know. I'm about to set my phone down and ignore this obvious scammer message, but for some very odd reason I text them back.

Oralee: Hi? This is she, I don't have your number saved in my phone. Who is this if you don't mind me asking? I don't feel comfortable sharing any information with a complete stranger :( Have to make sure you're not a scammer.

(xxx)xxx-xxxx: I understand completely! Of course you'd be cautious of an unknown number! Let me share some things that might make you a little more comfortable with who I am :) My name is Zandra Dominika and I'm 19 years old. I have your number because of your mother, Phelo Turner! I promise I'm not trying to scam you lol, just reaching out to see how your doing!

I think once I know someone is a female I instantly feel safer. It's... not the best feeling to acknowledge that, but then again it's good to still be aware of your surroundings. This person could still try to hurt me, plus they know my mom's name! That's absolutely fucked. I can't trust them right now. Why would I give them any personal information when they are most likely lying to me right now? Though the name Zandra did sound weirdly familiar. Like I knew it from a distant memory or something. Maybe I had seen it in my mom's memory book? I'd have to go check that out later.

(xxx)xxx-xxxx: I know you're probably taking so much time because you still think I'm a scammer, which is good! It shows that you're careful and smart! I'm glad you're not willing to send birthdates and shit to some rando. I'm not sure how I could prove to you that I'm not a scammer. I also know that I most likely scared you off with how I knew your mom. I could explain that if you'd be willing to listen?

Listen? I mean... I could do that, but no! This could be a ploy to get more information from my phone...or... they could be telling the truth. Damn it! I frown to myself, moving my thumbs to make the number a contact.

Oralee: It seems you know a lot about how I'm feeling and already have some information about me. I think this is all the recognition you need, but my curiosity does always get the best of me. Go ahead, tell me how you know my mother's name and how you got my number.

Zandra the randa: Okay... well I just knew how I would feel if someone randomly messaged me asking all these questions and knowing all these things lol. Anyways, I know your mom because she simply knows my mother. They go way back, like further than you're probably thinking right now. We've actually met before but I think you forgot lmao. We were really close actually, we didn't want to leave each other's side. Your mom is still in contact with mine so obviously I was curious how you were and asked for your number. I do think this is Oralee now so no recognition is needed anymore. I... uh... missed you a lot. It's lonely here.

I have to set my phone down for a second. What? I have a long lost friend? I really didn't see that one coming. I usually wasn't the one for making friends. I guess that gives me some explanation as to why I thought her name was so familiar. I'm going to ask mom to help me find that memory book when she gets home. That brings me back to what Zandra had last said. It's lonely here. What did she mean by that? Did she not live in our state? I wonder where she lives, maybe Montana? I'm going to ask her.

Oralee: So we used to know each other... I'm sorry I don't remember that at all honestly, but when my mom gets home I'm going to try and find some pictures if we have any. Maybe that'll help strike a cord in my brain. I do have a question though, where do you live? You make it sound like we're really far away :(

I straighten myself out on my bed, waiting patiently for a response, but one never seems to come. I wait for a good 10 minutes before deciding to do something other than just waiting. It wasn't healthy to get attached so quickly. I bite my lip. I wonder what she looks like. No, Lee there's no time to be gay now. Mom will be home soon and then you can look in the memory book.

I hope she's hot. You know, there are some days I wish I could just shut my thoughts off, especially the horny ones. She's got to at least be into DND, you know? If she can't enjoy be chaotic while being a mythical creature, I don't want it. DND was a way I could believe in small amounts that fairies are real. I smirk to myself as I think about all the times I tried to seduce something in our campaign.

"Lee? Are you awake? Honey I'm coming up!" I feel my body jolt from the sudden rush of adrenalin. Jesus, I guess my mom is home now. I didn't even hear the door open or a car pull up.

"Yeah I'm awake mom! I'll meet you in the hall." I hoist myself off the bed and shake my head. Shit, I didn't even know what time it was. It's nearly midnight and I have a shift tomorrow at the shop. I'm so fucked. I walk to my door and open it swiftly. I'm met with my mother leaned up against the wall across from it. She smiles sweetly at me, her eyes sparkling with delight.

"I missed you Lee." She holds her arms open for a hug and I instantly accept it.

"You too stinky. I hope you had a good night." I enjoy the smell of my mother, how it calms down my senses. It makes me want to cuddle with her all night watching movies, almost like what she suggested earlier. Shit! I never iced my back! That's going to hurt in the morning!

"Oh I did, it was long." I feel my body tense and I back away from her. My face scrunches up in disgust.

"Mom! God I don't want to hear about your night in that much detail!" I plug my ears like a child and shake my head vigorously.

"Meh, your loss." She shrugs and I can tell she wants to go to sleep. Her eyes are half lidded and she looks very loopy.

"If you're done, I do have a question. Where is that memory book you made when I was little? I got a text tonight from someone named Zandra Dominika. Do you know her?" I question, motioning towards her. She seems to suddenly wake up. Her eyes widen slightly as she processes what I just told her.

"Did you say Zandra finally reached out to you? Well thank fucking god, took her long enough. She's had your number for like 4 years. I thought ya'll would start where you left off, but I can see by your vacant expression that you don't know what I'm talking about." She smiles with a small chuckle. "Well, how about we talk about it tomorrow night okay? You and I can have some finger foods and maybe even some drinks. Talk for a while. I'll explain things to you clearly." She grins and gestures to my room. "Now, what do you say we get some sleep?" She nods and shuffles towards her room.

Well...how am I going to be two places at once? Do I want to go to a party or sit and veg out with my mom. Definitely the latter, but I have to go to the party, I promised Tabs. I'm just going to have to make both work!

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It was Sunday afternoon before I could think of an excuse to miss Tabitha's party. Ugh, why'd she have to be such a good friend. Yeah she's made plenty of mistakes in our friendship, but so have I. I've known her forever, I can't just let her down by telling her I'd come to her party and then not going. I know it shouldn't matter, but I just don't want to deal with her mad at me on top of trying to figure out who the hell Zandra was. My mom seemed to like her enough I guess, but was that just a mom thing? Was I really close to this girl or is my mom trying to get me a girlfriend? I purse my lips as I give that a little more thought. Nah, my mom isn't the type to do that, she's not that desperate to please her gay daughter. She knows relationships, especially those of the gay variety have to take time. They have to happen naturally, not by some silly match making friend. It makes both parties feel very uncomfortable.

"Miss? I'd like to buy those now." I hear someone say. It was a guy about my age who looked pretty nervous. He had that all time popular floofy hair and had sun kissed skin. His eyes were an emerald green, like how you'd see algae in a pond. His face looks like someone took brown paint and scattered freckles all over it. I smile in my customer satisfaction smile.

"Of course! Sorry I was just lost in thought about something going on." I laugh lightly to try and make this situation less awkward.

"Yeah I totally get it! I'm not sure what flowers she'll like, so I'm sort of freaking out about it." He looks up to meet my gaze, his emerald eyes lighting up. "Hey do you think a mysterious type of girl who doesn't really like flowers would like these?" He holds up black nemophilas. I smirk to myself. Did he really have to pick such a literal meaning for a flower? I think this guy is way over his head. He shouldn't be buying flowers for this girl, he should be taking her to watch the stars. She seems like the kind of girl to like that.

"Well, those flowers have a secret meaning, you wanna know what it is?" I raise my brows like I'm about to whisk this guy into a crazy story about how these flowers got their name. He nods his head frantically. "Those are black Nemophilas, they usually are small beautiful flowers, but can bloom in all white, pink, white with some purple, or like what you have there. They're called black Nemophilas but they actually look purple with white around the edges of the petals right? Although it's cooler to think that they bloomed black. They're mostly grown as a houseplant because of their resistance to freezing temperatures." I grin widely. I get so happy talking about flowers. I meet his eyes again and he looks extremely happy.

"Shit. Thank you so much. I'm sure she'll love these." He smiles kindly and for the first time in a while, I see him lift the buds to his nose. He takes a small whiff in and a grin spreads across his face. "It smells like sweat." He laughs.

"I-uh... yeah, they're not known for smelling too nice." I stumble over my words, still shocked that someone actually stopped to smell a flower in my shop. They were always too busy buying the flowers to care about what they smelled like. It seemed like the first time someone had cared enough to take time out of their day to smell the flowers. Instead of picking up the prettiest rose and whisking it away without a second glance my way.

I gulp in, not knowing why him smelling a flower got to me so much. "Uh, yeah if you'll just set them down here I'll get them prepared for you to take." I nod curtly and whisk around to the preparation counter. It has scissors, shears, a spray bottle, and some other gardening things. Get it together Lee.

"Thanks so much for this by the way. Pretty sure she's going to fall in love with me because of the sweaty flowers. My name is Elijah, I think we go to school together." I feel my back tense. Great, he goes to my school.

"Yeah?" I say over my shoulder. "What grade are you in?" I ask. Lee why are you continuing the conversation? You don't even like to talk to your cat most of the time.

"I'm a junior, struggling in Mrs. Groution's English class." I can almost hear the smile in his voice. "You're a senior right?" He prods. Dear lord he has seen me around school.

"Yup!" I reply politely. "I'm just ready to get out of here and graduate you know? I have the case of senioritis bad." What I said was honest. I didn't like my high school. It was filled with fake kids and even more fake adults. We had a "zero tolerance" for bullying, yet some of my friends can tell me stories they've heard that says otherwise. It was just an overall distaste for the whole putting on looks situation. A school wasn't supposed to use kids like that, I absolutely hated it. His voice takes me out of thought and back to the situation at hand. I was having an interaction, I needed to focus on that, no matter how much I wanted to hide from it. There were days like this, the ones where I didn't want to be around people at all, but other days it's better to be around them so I can thrive off of some energy people give off.

"You seem a bit lost in though, I'm sorry I can just get out of your hair." He laughs, but I can tell he's a little hurt by the fact I'm so lost in thought. I feel bad even though I barely know the guy.

"Nah, I'm just a deep thinker you know? I get lost in thought very easily. I'm not the best in social situations face to face." I turn to give him a genuine smile. I see his eyes light up again. Good, he feels better.

"Oh no I totally get how that feels. I hate how our school does this whole," he instantly puts on a fake posh accent, "We have the smartest and happiest kids." He lets out a chuckle afterwards. "Little do they know that half of us are depressed and the other half are too busy peaking in high school to be bothered by their sadness." I turn to look him in the eyes, mine growing wider by the second. We make eye contact and then suddenly burst into laughter. My word, he does get it. Shame on me for assuming Elijah and I would have nothing in common. After a bit I can finally breathe again from laughing so hard. I wipe my eyes still giggling lightly.

"Here are your flowers Elijah, good luck." I smile as he graciously takes the flowers and waves enthusiastically to me as he leaves. The smile stayed on my lips for the rest of my work day. Then it was time for me to get ready for Tabitha's party. Joy to the world.

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I ended up wearing something comfortable over cute. If anyone had issue with it, I'd just tell them to fuck off. Well, not actually, I'd just think it. I was in some black sweats with a stretchy maroon shirt. I slipped my off brand crocs I got from a farmers market with my mom a couple years ago and a cute anklet. I pull my hair up in a pony to keep it mostly out of my face. I had normal blonde hair that was naturally pretty curly, but I had a Great Aunt who would give me perms every once in a while. Noting this, I pull some curly strands to frame my face so it didn't look so round. I put on a dangly bracelet and my chain necklace. I'm overall happy with my look, but I'm sure Tabitha will have something to say about it. I decide to put on some gold rings to match the chain in hopes that they'll suffice for her.

I stuff my phone and some earbuds in my pocket and then grab a few dollars out of my wallet. I could need some cash for food later, not sure. I do a once over of myself in the mirror and pat my pudgy stomach. "Oh yeah Oralee Turner you are looking sexy tonight." I give myself finger guns in the mirror and head out my door, grinning to myself like an idiot. I hop down the stairs and towards the front door. Mom hadn't come home yet from errands so I write her a quick note to let her know I'll be back a little later than midnight, seeing as it was getting close to 6 already. Speaking of the time, where the hell is Tabitha? She said was going to pick me up right? I cram my hand into my pocket to find my phone. I unlock it only to find Tabitha had texted me a couple minutes earlier.

Tabby: Hey, I can't pick you up tonight! :( I have to meet up with someone pretty soon so you're going to have to drive yourself!! Sorry babes!

I groan and turn my phone off. This was a great start to the night, because not only did I not like driving, but I was definitely not okay with my car going to a party. I angrily grab my keys from the bowl in the halltree and rush out to my car. I want to be one of the firsts ones there so I can find a good place to sit and an escape route. I start my small car and am met with my comfort station of old rock songs. Okay, maybe this wouldn't be so bad. I pull out of the driveway and roll my window down. The fresh nigh air whips the tendrils of hair I pulled out around my face, it's slightly annoying, but I like the fresh air. It smells like rain and it was such a cool night. It's about a couple minutes into driving when I realize Tabitha didn't tell me where this party was being held. Damn it why am I still even trying to go to this thing? It's like I felt some kind of pull to go and I hated that Tabitha could just pull on my heart strings like that. I pull over into an abandoned parking lot and pull out my phone.

Buttface: where the fuck is this party again?

The reply is almost instant.

Tabby: Ah, it's at this jock's house. 1987 Elmore North, I think his name is Elijah, come on get here girl!!

My eyes widen and a grin spreads across my lips. You sneaky son of a bitch. Did Elijah buy those flowers for Tabs? Maybe this is why I felt such a pull to go to the party. I can get to know Elijah more and if he's that cool then maybe the people he invited are pretty cool too. I feel like a ton of bricks have been lifted off my shoulders as I set my phone down in one of the cup holders. His house was a short drive from where I was now, it would only take me about 2 minutes to get there and his neighborhood is rather large, meaning big houses, meaning there's bound to be a dog to pet. Count me truly ready to party now.

I make it to his house and hop out of my car. I feel lucky that not a lot of cars are there yet and that I can see Tabitha's. Should I have brought something? No, I did help him pick out those flowers. I subconsciously put my hands in my pockets, walking up to the backyard gate which is open. There are outside lights set up and small campfire flickering in a stone firepit. There's a deck with a grill and below ground pool near the fence line of the property. It's a pretty nice backyard, but I only see a couple people out here and none of them are anyone I know. I hurry up and spot the glass sliding door to the inside. Of course it's a glass sliding door. I clumsily wander over to the door and slide it open. I'm hit with warm air and a yelling voice coming from deeper in the house. I glance back to the group outside which consists of 2 boys and 3 girls all chatting about an English assignment. I definitely don't want to try to join in on their conversation so I step inside and shut the door from behind me.

"I thought we had something Tabby!" I hear a familiar voice yell.

"Well you don't know shit! And don't call me that! I should have never come here! Damn it!" Once I hear my friend's name I'm on my way to find her, when I do find her, I find Elijah with her. Tabitha has the flowers clutched in her hands, breaking the stems. Elijah breaks his angry stare from Tabitha when he spots me. He looks almost shocked to see me, but his demeanor changes when he puts it together that I'm not here to be on his side. "What took you so long Lee? I was waiting for you!" Tabitha stares at me with pleading eyes, her grip on the flowers hardening, I can tell by the way they droop even lower to the ground.

"I-I had to drive myself and I didn't know where I w-was going at first." I look between the two of them. "What's going on?" I shouldn't have come here. I shouldn't have come here. Why did I come here? I take a few steps backwards.

"This fucker thought flowers where his way into my pants." Tabitha hisses and tosses the flowers to the ground. I wince. I get that she was upset, but the flowers didn't do anything. They had a nice life after all, I cut and prepared them. Someone actually stopped to smell them. I got to share facts about them! I never get to do that! "Well fuck that." Before I can think she stomps the flowers into the hardwood floor. Her boot cuts into their stems and when she's done it's a mess of petals and leaves.

"I wasn't trying to get into your pants!" Elijah finally shouts. "I actually just wanted to be a gentleman because so many fucking guys out here are disgusting!" I can tell he's upset about her stepping on the flowers and her words by the way his voice wobbles and his eyes flit between the crumpled petals. I'm upset now too. I can't really tell why I'm so upset but I meet Tabitha's eyes with tears in my own. My brows are drawn into an angry expression as I glance down at the mess by her feet.

"I-they-you- those flowers had no part in this... why'd you do that? You know how I feel about flowers Tabs. They have lives too." I meet her gaze again. I want her to apologize but all she does is roll her eyes.

"They're not alive Lee, don't be such a pansy. For fuck's sake can we focus on my problems here?" She hisses. A chill runs through my body. I can feel my blood boil and freeze almost simultaneously. Elijah stares at her in disbelief.

"Fuck you." I hiss and squeeze my eyes shut. The tears finally break over the barrier and fall down my cheeks. I rush out the way I came, a sick feeling settling in the pit of my stomach.

She knows how I feel about them! She knows how much they meant to my grandad. How much shit he had to go through to keep the shop going. He raised me, teaching me about the different effects flowers could have. Flowers were a language not spoken by many.

"Lee! Lee wait I'm sorry! I was angry! Lee-" I run. I run until I'm outside and shutting the door. Why'd I come here? Why'd I do it? God I was so stupid? Stupid. That's me. No no no no, fuck! I ball my fists and wipe at my face. I realize the group outside is looking my way and I curse under my breath. I turn on my heel and fast walk the fuck out of there. I try to make the tears stop falling, but they keep streaming down my face.

"Fuck, fuck, shit." I curse, then suddenly I knock shoulders with someone who grunts because of the impact. I stop in my tracks, I may be upset but my mother taught me manners. "Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-" I finally look up to see who I bumped into. A tall girl about my age stands in front of me. She has pink hair tied into space buns and heart shaped glasses on. Her earrings are also in the shape of hearts as well as the choker she's wearing. She has high-waisted jeans on with a flowy blouse to match. She was absolutely stunning. She even had a beauty mark under her eye that stood out in the moonlight.

"It's okay," She pauses as she gets a better look at me. "A-are you okay?" Her brows instantly knit in concern. Shit, has she noticed I'm not mentally stable already?

"I-uh... yeah I'm fine." I decide to answer. "I... I'm actually going." I sigh. She purses her lips and then frowns.

"That's too bad, you seemed cool. I was hoping to talk some more." She grins. I nod in agreement.

"I am pretty cool, but I should really get going." I jab my thumb towards where my car is.

"Lee?" I whisk around to see Tabitha at the gate.

"Shit." I hiss. "See ya, I gotta go!" I yell and practically Olympic sprint to my car. I unlock my car as fast as I can and hop in. I turn the key and start to back out when I see Tabitha waving wildly in front of me. Yeah, I'm never going to another one of her 'fun' parties. I shake my head and wipe at my face. Pansy? I tense as I speed towards home. Never again.

I get home around 8:45pm and to my surprise my mom is home. I pull in behind her car and put mine in park. I don't think this night can get any worse. I get out of my car, lock it, spin my keys around my fingers a couple times, and then head towards my front door. Before I can open it, it's opened for me. "Evening sweetie, what brings you home so early?" My mother stands in the doorway with a frown on her face. I sigh and lightly push past her into the house.

"Oh you know, just too cool for the party life." I give her a fake smile and she clicks her tongue.

"That bad?" She questions. I nod and flop down on the couch. It's then that I notice the memory book on the coffee table. Her eyes light up. "Oh yes! Miss Zandra, you wanted to see a picture of her right? Now, since you're home so early we're going to have lots of time to look at pictures and discuss, but I need you to have an open mind." She gives me a stern look. I roll my eyes.

"Mom, I'm a gay teen, I have to keep an open mind at all times." I fire back. She pauses for a moment then nods her head in agreement. She flops down next to me grabbing one of the books. I snuggle up next to her, loving her comforting scent.

"Ah here's a good one, it's of you guys when you were little." She flips the book for me to see the picture. It's little me with that appears to be strap on fairy wings on my back, same for who I'm assuming is Zandra.

"That's her?" I point to the other little girl. She nods and coos about how cute we look. Zandra has the same sparkly dress up wings on. I chuckle at how cheap they look. Mom flips a couple pages and gasps.

"Oh and here's a more recent picture of her!" She taps the page excitedly. My eyes widen as I scan the photo in front of me. Pink hair tied back in regal braids, a white dress with gold accents trailing up the bodice, her slender arms folded in front of her, and those same sparkling wings on her back, only about four times the size. I gasp as my eyes follow what seems to be a swirling pattern in them.

"I-is she into fantasy shoots or something?" I choke over my words. She was beautiful. It takes me a moment to finally notice the glimmering gold crown around her head. It has a hanging purple jewel dangling in the middle of her forehead. My eyes trail down her face and land on a beauty mark under her eye. If my eyes could widen any more I think they did at that moment.

"Um, well not exactly sweetie, there's been something I've needed to tell you for a while now."

Of course.