Tumgik
#hey! sorry for the late answer! ive been a touch busy :)
Note
oh oh do you have data about jirachi?? there is so little of them and your headcanons are so cool!!
Yes!
Jirachi, as you all know, only wakes for a week before hibernating for one thousand years. However, and this is little known from what I can tell, it can be awoken by a few other things:
-If times of darkness and peril call for it, Jirachi will wake up early and attempt to assist. It's been found a few times throughout history that with great catastrophe certain Mythical Pokemon who are often not seen by the public eye will rise solely to stop the threat before it can get worse.
-Allegedly, a trainer of pure heart could speak to Jirachi, and it would wake for them. I've heard rumors of this happening, however, I can't confirm it as I myself don't have a connection to Jirachi.
On another note, while Jirachi is often seen as a generally benevolent Pokemon, near all the Mythical and Legendary Pokémon fall into a gray area. There are some, such as Keldeo with its strong sense of justice and Giratina with its sway towards the dark, that lean more towards good or evil, but all of them are for, the most part, neutral. That, and I've heard Jirachi occasionally likes to play tricks and twist wishes. It's not every day, and from the documents I scoured, those who were tricked weren't exactly great people themselves.
That's about all I could scrounge up. Thanks for the question!
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milkybonya · 2 years
Text
trust yourself ☆ jeongwoo
order 068, 🐦 anon: large honey milk tea with fresh taro and mango jelly for trsr's jeongwoo
!: a bit of angst here and there because reader is sad :(
#: idol!bf!jeongwoo x gn reader, comfort fluff
[💌: hi anon here you are ! i hope this fic can keep you warm on rainy days even tho its short and not that goodjdjdj!! also trust yourself by balming tiger is so good and so true,, ive added it at the bottom heh]
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having a significant other means sharing the good and the bad with them. it means laughing together, crying together, and everything inbetween. yet, having an idol boyfriend is a bit different... at least, it is for you. Jeongwoo is your everything.. so you don't want to hurt him. you close off when you're sad so he won't have to risk his mood being ruined by listening to you vent.
little do you know, his day is ruined when you don't vent. he's your boyfriend, for pete's sake! he gets worried when you close off and he'd rather cry with you than have you shedding tears all alone.
maybe it's because Jeongwoo, and maybe also you, are both so young. maybe you think that he has to be protected because of his young age. maybe it's something else.
Jeongwoo doesn't know.
he rattles his brain in the waiting room for answers after reading and rereading your text to him.
i'm sorry i've been mia, Jeongwoo. things are not so great and i don't want to burden you with that.
why would you be burdening him? why would you think that way?--
"hey, jeongjeong! watchu doin'," Jaehyuk asks Jeongwoo, sliding in beside him on a touch.
"just thinking," Jeongwoo mumbles back.
"about?"
"y/n and how they won't share their sorrows with me because they don't want to burden me."
"ah.. y/n is just really considerate. but i get you.. it's hard to wait so long for a loved one. you don't have to force anything out of them--how about you just do something they love with them to cheer them up?" Jaehyuk explains.
Jeongwoo's eyes light up and he smiles.
"you're right!"
-
"Jeongwoo, 1 minute until camera rehearsals," a staff points out.
"i know! just let me--" Jeongwoo aggressively types out a text to you, telling you to meet him at your favourite café after his schedule is over. he pokes his tongue out as he types, focusing hard.
once it's done, he puts his phone away and joins the other members to prepare to rush on-stage.
meanwhile, you're at home watching the live of the music performance. you've been having such a hard time these days but your boyfriend and his group always make you feel a bit better. treasure are up next and just as they're about to go up, you get a text from Jeongwoo?! isn't he busy right now?!
you read it and smile, knowing that the typos must be from him typing his message to you in such a rush before his stage.
just watching him perform their comeback already fills you with so much joy, so you're giddy as you get changed and rush out to meet your boyfriend at the café. on the way, you hum treasure's songs, walking a little faster than usual and enjoying the warm breeze.
Jeongwoo is already there, still slightly sweaty and makeup+hair still intact as he smiles in your direction.
"y/n!" he stands up, grinning at the sight of you.
you're gorgeous despite your tired frame, and he's so happy to see you that his knees start feeling weak. you feel shy as you run up to hug him, butterflies filling you as his arms wrap around you. his hug is warm and his scent is like home.
"take a seat, i got you your favourite drink," he says, pushing the cup towards you.
you take it and drink, relaxing even more. the two of you are seated by the window and you briefly glance outside, watching as couples walk together.
"what's the occasion, Jeongjeong?" you ask.
"well... i know things haven't been so amazing for you lately. i just wanted to meet you in person to tell you that i love you and i'm rooting for you," he says, only meeting your eyes after he's done talking. he doesn't want to make you feel worse.
the effort he's made for you makes your heart ache, but in the best way possible.
"if you want to talk to me, i'm here. if not, i'm still here. i'll wait for you. and.. i just want you to trust yourself, no matter what's happening. please know.. it's okay to not be alright, and that things will be alright eventually. just take your time, everything will fall into place!"
you have to fight back tears as you reach for Jeongwoo's hands, giving them a big squeeze.
"i really needed to hear that, Jeongwoo. thank you," you say.
Jeongwoo's own lips wobble as he watches you get emotional, and he stares at the ceiling to stop himself from crying.
"hey, you big crybaby! don't cry because of me, i'll get sad.." you whine.
"i'm not crying!" he says, as his lips quiver more intensely.
you laugh, stroking his soft hair and caressing his cheek.
"i just love you, y/n. i won't let this world hurt you, ever." his eyes sparkle as he speaks to you and your heart is filled with warmth.
in that moment you realize that no matter what happens, you can overcome it, because you'll always have at least once person rooting for you.
and one of those people will always be me, dear reader. me, milky. ♡
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steddieworks · 1 year
Text
you can change (right next to me) - iv
hi!! I'm so sorry that it has taken me forever and a day to update but life has just been busy and hectic lately! I also haven't really been in the mood for writing lately, and I didn't want to post something half-assed just to say i've posted
that being said... here's chapter 4 of the tutor au! things got away from me this chapter and so i'm fairly certain the new chapter count will be a bit longer, but we'll just have to see how the next couple of them go!
happy reading!
read on ao3
Summary:
Steve’s got a soft look on his face when Eddie meets his gaze. “I think I’m ready to go to the doctor for my hearing problems,” he whispers.
Eddie grins, and knows that he probably looks ridiculous, but he literally can’t help it. Steve is being brave - braver than Eddie would ever be, probably, and doing the things that scared him, and Eddie can only hope that someday he’ll be able to do that too.
or,
Steve makes a decision.
Word Count: 10.8k
Warnings: swearing, mild smut, discussions of disabilities
It takes about a week for Steve to make up his mind about the hearing thing.
And in that week, Eddie feels tortured, or maybe blessed, with Steve wearing his glasses. He shows up to class Monday without them, but when Eddie catches him squinting at the board, he walks by and murmurs a soft, “forgetting something?”
Steve seems flustered by it, but digs them out with a huff. He glares at Eddie for a few minutes, or tries to at least, before he breaks, sliding them onto his face and giving him a soft little smile. Eddie grins, waggling his eyebrows and mouthing the word “hot” at him, which only makes Steve blush.
They’re so obvious with it that Barbera fake-gags, which embarrasses Eddie just enough to stop flirting until the end of class. He means to catch Steve before he leaves, just to check in with him and make sure they’re still on for their tutoring session the next day, but Steve is out the door before Eddie even finishes packing his bag. He tries not to take it personally, and when Tuesday rolls around and Steve does show up for their tutoring session, Eddie knows it isn’t really about him. Still, he’s not oblivious to the fact that Steve keeps things strictly business, all school-related talk and nothing else, and this trend continues for the rest of the week.
It’s Friday evening when something finally changes.
They’re at the library for their usual tutoring session, and Eddie is watching Steve as he writes the answer to one of the workbook’s questions, his hand moving slowly and carefully as he writes. It’s quiet in their little pocket of space in the corner, so Eddie notices immediately when someone approaches them on Steve’s bad side.
Not that Steve has a bad side, exactly. It’s just, like… the side he can’t hear from.
The person, who Eddie vaguely recognizes from the history lecture, says, “hey, Steve, do you happen to have the notes from Wednesday?”
Steve doesn’t reply. Doesn’t even look up.
Eddie gives the girl - Delilah? Dina? Something like that - a small smile before reaching out and touching Steve’s wrist.
“Hm?” Steve says, still not looking up.
“Honey, you’ve got a visitor,” Eddie says, voice quiet but close enough to Steve’s good ear that his gaze snaps up, then over, flushing when he sees the girl standing there.
“Oh, hey Nicole,” he says, clearly embarrassed.
Nicole? Close enough.
“Hey, Steve,” she says, clearly confused. “Um, I was just asking if you happened to have the notes from Wednesday. I had a doctor’s appointment and you’re the first person I’ve seen from that class since then.”
There’s a panic-stricken look on Steve’s face as he processes her words. “Oh, um…” he says, shuffling his papers around. Eddie knows his notebook is in his bag still, and he knows that Steve does have the notes, and yet he says, “I don’t have them with me, actually.”
“Oh,” Nicole says, her face falling. “Okay, then. Well, um. Thanks anyway.” She starts to walk away, but Eddie stops her.
“Hey, Nicole? I’ve got the notes, so I can email them to you when I get home,” Eddie tells her. His hand is still resting on Steve’s wrist, so he notices it when Steve turns his hand over, lacing their fingers together and squeezing. Eddie thinks it might be a little thank you.
“Oh, perfect! Thanks so much, Mr. Munson,” she says. “I’ll see you guys Monday!”
Eddie smiles and waves at her with his free hand, while Steve just nods at her before turning back to his work. When his pencil doesn’t move, however, Eddie frowns. “What’s the matter, baby?” he asks, speaking softly.
Steve shrugs, then sniffles, covering his face with his free hand and shaking his head.
Oh.
“Oh, babe,” Eddie sighs sympathetically, scooting his chair closer and bringing his hand up to gently rub Steve’s back. “I… I won’t pretend to know what you’re going through with this. But, can you talk to me? Tell me what part is bothering you?”
Steve shakes his head again, then seems to change his mind and nods instead. “I just…” He trembles, and Eddie waits, patiently rubbing circles onto his back and squeezing his hand again. “Now that I’m like, aware of it, I’m starting to hyperfixate on it.”
“On what?” Eddie asks, although he’s pretty sure he already knows.
“The hearing thing. Like… How many fucking times have I just sat and ignored someone because I just couldn’t fucking hear them?” He’s getting a little louder than is probably acceptable at a library, so Eddie gently shushes him. He looks sheepish for a moment, lowering his head to rest on their intertwined hands. “I just… I don’t know. I feel broken.”
Eddie’s heart fucking shatters when he hears that. He hates to imagine that Steve has been dealing with these feelings by himself for so long before now, but he knows that he probably has. The only thing he can do now is be there for him, but thinking about a younger Steve, struggling with this alone, almost makes him sick.
“I know, Stevie. I mean… I haven’t been through this, but I get the whole… feeling broken thing. But you’re not broken.” A heavy silence falls upon them, and he hopes Steve can read the subtext, because he’s just not sure if he can spell it out for him just yet.
Apparently, he doesn’t need to. Steve tilts his head, looking up at Eddie and giving him a frown. “You’re not broken, either.” Before Eddie can protest, Steve sits up straight, leaning into Eddie’s space a bit more than he normally would, his hand coming up to cup Eddie’s jaw. “No. If I’m not broken, then neither are you. We’re… we’re okay.”
Eddie gives him a little smile, and an easy agreement. “We’re okay,” he says softly. He tilts his head, catching Steve’s hand and pressing a little kiss to his palm. He just can’t help himself.
Steve’s got a soft look on his face when Eddie meets his gaze. “I think I’m ready to go to the doctor for my hearing problems,” he whispers.
Eddie grins, and knows that he probably looks ridiculous, but he literally can’t help it. Steve is being brave - braver than Eddie would ever be, probably, and doing the things that scared him, and Eddie can only hope that someday he’ll be able to do that too.
He kisses Steve’s hand again, holding it in both of his and smiling at him. “I’m so proud of you,” he murmurs. “I’m serious, Steve. I know you don’t want to go, and it’s scary, but I’m so fucking proud of you for deciding that it’s worth it to try.”
Steve has a sort of bashful look on his face, but Eddie’s not backing down. He wants Steve to know, without a doubt, how supportive he is of this decision. “Well, it’s not really that big of a deal,” he mumbles.
Eddie shakes his head. “Okay, maybe not. But that doesn’t mean it’s not scary. That doesn’t mean it’s not brave to do it. And that doesn’t make me any less proud of you.” He uses Steve’s hand that he’s got trapped in his to boop him on the nose.
Steve looks sort of embarrassed, but smiles, ducking his head. “Will you go with me again?” He asks, studying their hands. He brings his other hand down to tangle their fingers together, and Eddie lets him, helpless to intervene when he’s being so sweet and touchy after so many days without it.
“Of course,” Eddie replies immediately. “Always. Anytime you need me, darlin’, I’m there.”
He watches as Steve’s face flushes, and he has to bite back a grin. He’s so easy to rile up, even when Eddie isn’t particularly trying to. “Okay,” Steve mumbles. “We should… finish this?” He sounds uncertain.
Eddie nods, though honestly he could give a fuck less about the stupid worksheet that Murray assigned. “Sure, Stevie. And I can drive you home when we’re done, if you want.”
Steve pulls his right hand away from Eddie’s to grab his pencil, but taps it on the book a few times before speaking. “I was actually thinking… Maybe I could go back to yours? And we could, um… watch a movie or something?” He sounds so hopeful, and has an air of forced nonchalance that Eddie can’t help but smirk at.
Then what he’s asking sets in. “Uh…” Eddie hesitates. Not because he doesn’t want to spend more time with Steve, or course not. But because… he’s not sure he’ll be able to maintain this quasi-friendly distance between them if they’re all alone in his apartment.
“We don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Steve mumbles after a minute of silence. “I just-“
Apparently Eddie has even less self control than he thought, because he just nods and smiles. “No, yeah. Let’s do that. You said you’ve never seen Lord of the Rings, right?” He’s mostly joking, but the wide-eyed, panicked look that fills Steve’s face then just solidifies it. “It’s a long one, so you’ll have to hurry up if you wanna be able to finish it tonight.”
Steve sighs like he regrets ever asking, but gives Eddie a little smile when he looks back down at his work. “Alright.”
~~~
Eddie doesn’t actually make Steve rush through the assignment, but he hints at the correct answers more frequently than he normally would. If Steve notices the difference, he doesn’t say anything, and when he finishes, he lets Eddie help him pack up his things without argument.
If Eddie didn’t know any better, he’d think Steve was… excited.
But surely that can’t be the case. Steve had never shown any interest in any of Eddie’s nerd shit before now, so surely there’s something else. Then again, if Steve’s excited/nervous for the same reason that Eddie himself is… that might be a problem in and of itself.
“How long did you say this movie was again?” Steve asks as Eddie is driving them away from campus, towards his apartment.
“Well,” Eddie says, hesitating. “Um… I don’t think I did.”
“What?” Steve glances at him, clearly confused.
Eddie scratches his chin awkwardly. “I didn’t say how long it was,” he admits, biting his lip a little and avoiding meeting Steve’s gaze.
“Oh,” Steve says. A few seconds later, he shrugs. “Okay.”
Eddie balks at him. Surely he’s not just giving in that easily? Without any sort of estimate about when he can expect to go home?
“Do you… not want to know how long it is?” Eddie asks. The fun has run its course if Steve’s not playing along, but Eddie had expected the joke to last a bit longer, if he’s honest.
Steve just shrugs again. “It doesn’t really matter to me,” he says casually. When Eddie glances at him, Steve is already turned to face him fully. Eddie feels a little bad for avoiding eye contact so far on the drive, realizing acutely that Steve relies on lip-reading significantly. “Are you gonna make me go home if I fall asleep during it?”
Eddie blinks at him. He can feel his face flushing a little, at even the suggestion of the alternative. That he should just let Steve sleep over, like they’re friends, when they are most certainly not.
“Um,” Eddie says, stupidly. “Probably not. For starters, that would be really shitty of you, to fall asleep during the best cinematic masterpiece of our time, and secondly,” he pauses to glance the opposite way before turning right at a stop sign. He normally wouldn’t bother, but… precious cargo. “I could never be that cruel. It’s a long one. And since it’s your first time, I’ll let it slide if you fall asleep.”
Steve makes a noise that’s a bit like a laugh or a snort, and when Eddie glances at him, he’s got a smirk on his face. “That sounded a bit dirty,” he teases.
Eddie rolls his eyes. “No, you’re just dirty-minded. Get your thoughts out of the gutter, Harrington.”
“What if I want them in the gutter?” Steve says, sly and coy.
Eddie clears his throat. “Um.”
Luckily, Steve takes pity on him. “Can we order Chinese?”
~~~
They do order Chinese, and while they wait for it to arrive, Eddie frets about setting up the movie.
“Now this is god-tier shit, alright? And there’s all these layers to the lore, so if you have a question I’ll have to pause the whole thing and-“ Eddie is explaining all this as he’s turned away, but he pauses when he turns around and finds Steve staring at him. He’s got this little smile on his lips, and it takes Eddie a second to get it. “You couldn’t hear any of that, could you?”
Steve breaks out into a full grin at that. “Not really. It sounded sort of muffled, but I got bits and pieces of it.”
Eddie shakes his head, embarrassed. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I-“
Steve steps towards him, shaking his head. “Don’t… please don’t do that.”
“Do what?” Eddie says quietly, hyper-aware of the lack of space between them.
“Don’t treat me like I’m broken. Just… treat me the way you always do.” Steve’s voice breaks, and so does Eddie’s heart.
“Oh, baby,” Eddie sighs. He reaches out for Steve, pulling him into a tight hug. Luckily, Steve goes willingly. “I’m sorry. I’m not… I’m really not trying to treat you differently, like, in a bad way. I’m just trying to be more accommodating, now that I sort of know how.”
Steve nods. “I know. I just… I really hate being like this, Eddie.”
Eddie’s heart feels like lead in his chest, his ribs too tight around the organ. “I know,” he mumbles against Steve’s hair, rubbing his back in long, smooth motions. “Well… not completely, but… I understand why you’re frustrated.”
Steve sniffles. Eddie kisses the top of his head, not even caring if Steve feels the affectionate touch. “Yeah,” he says, tiredly. “Can we just watch the movie? And… and not talk about all my problems?”
Eddie nods, but pulls back to look at him. “Okay, but let me say one last thing?” Steve shrugs, so Eddie takes that as an agreement. “You’re allowed to talk about these things with me. I know you feel weird about it, but just know that I’ll always listen if you need to talk. Okay?”
“Okay,” Steve agrees quietly. “Thanks, Eddie.”
Helpless to his own stupid urges, Eddie leans in again to kiss Steve’s forehead. “Alright. Movie time.”
~~~
The food comes as they’re gathering up pillows and blankets and all the snuggly things that Eddie can find in his apartment. They build a fort of sorts on his sofa, and between the two of them, they’re laughing and giggling at the absurdity of it all, the child-like glee from playing like kids again.
“You know, I’ve never been able to use chopsticks,” Eddie notes vaguely as they settle in to start eating.
“Really?” Steve asks, all curious and amused. “I could teach you, if you want.”
Eddie looks over at him, surprised. “Would you really?”
Steve shrugs. “Sure, why not. C’mere.”
So that’s how Eddie finds himself, sitting in front of Steve, his ass barely hanging onto the edge of the couch, Steve’s thighs bracketing his hips. Eddie’s not sure this is an entirely foolproof method, but he doesn’t argue when Steve tells him where to sit.
“Alright, so, you just hold the bottom one steady like this,” Steve explains, demonstrating on his own hand. “And then the top one is used like a pincer. You just use it to pinch your food.”
Eddie nods, turning his head so that Steve will be able to hear him. “Sounds simple enough.”
Steve smiles, reaching for his hand. “Alright, let me show you how to hold it.” He goes through the whole routine again, this time positioning the chopsticks between Eddie’s fingers instead of his own. “Okay, now try to get a piece of chicken.”
Eddie reaches forward, but nearly slides off the couch in the process. “Man, I don’t think this is the best seating arrangement you’ve ever come up with.”
“Hm?” Steve hums against his shoulder, his arm slipping around Eddie’s waist to hold him. Eddie’s not sure this will prevent him from tumbling off the couch, but he’s not about to turn down the almost-cuddle.
“I said I don’t think this is the best seating arrangement,” Eddie repeats, turning his head to the side to glance back at Steve. “Even though you make one hell of a seatbelt,” he says with a smirk.
Steve blushes, pinching Eddie’s stomach lightly. “Behave,” Steve says when Eddie squeals. “And pick up the chicken! We’re losing precious daylight hours here.”
Eddie rolls his eyes, even as he leans forward once more to try and use the chopsticks. “Fine,” he mumbles. It takes him a few tries, but eventually he does manage to pinch a piece of chicken between the ends of the chopsticks. “Look! I did it!” He cheers, turning quickly in his excitement to show Steve.
Of course, that’s exactly when the chicken slips out from between the chopsticks, landing on the floor.
Eddie sighs. “Fuck this,” he says solemnly, going to put the chopsticks down in exchange for a fork.
“Hey,” Steve protests, reaching around him to scoop the chopsticks back up. “Just because you’re trash at it now doesn’t mean you can’t learn. Here, watch what I do.” Steve carefully leans forward, his arm tightening around Eddie’s chest to hold him still. Eddie feels like he can barely breathe as he watches Steve easily scoop up a piece of chicken with the chopsticks, expertly bringing it out of the bowl without dropping it.
Eddie expects Steve to eat the morsel himself, so he’s surprised when instead, the chopsticks halt in front of his mouth. “Here,” Steve says softly.
He almost wants to tease him, but the fear of breaking the moment altogether forces Eddie to just accept it, opening his mouth and letting Steve feed him. “Mm.��
“Is it good?” Steve asks, his hand beginning to trace meaningless shapes on Eddie’s stomach.
“Yeah,” Eddie finds himself whispering, his throat feeling a little tight, and not because of the food.
What use are their stupid boundaries about kissing if they’re going to do shit like this? He wonders.
“Want to try again?” Steve asks.
Eddie shakes his head. “No, maybe next time.”
“Okay,” Steve says easily enough. Eddie expects him to push him away now, grab a fork and both of them eat like normal people.
That’s not what happens.
Instead, Steve shuffles in his seat, lifting up his legs and carefully draping them over Eddie’s. “Is this okay?” He whispers.
Eddie swallows hard, but nods. His idea of “okay” is so skewed as of now, he really doesn’t know what qualifies anymore. “Yeah, it’s okay,” he mumbles.
Steve crosses his legs over Eddie’s lap, and if Eddie didn’t feel so choked up, he’d probably laugh at the way he’s basically got a human backpack.
“Can you hold my food for me? So I don’t have to lean so far?” Steve asks, his arm tightening around Eddie’s chest.
Eddie nods, but glances back at Steve before he grabs the take-out container for him. “Are you sure it wouldn’t just be easier to sit beside me?”
Steve blushes. “I mean… yeah, it would.” He doesn’t say anything else, staring at Eddie with wide, hopeful eyes.
“I’ll take that as a no, then,” Eddie laughs, reaching for the take-out container with a hand on one of Steve’s ankles. “Here you go, baby.”
He holds the carton close to Steve’s right hand to make it easier on him, then frowns at his own plate. He’s not sure exactly how they’re going to manage it like this, to be honest. He’s pulled from his thoughts when Steve hums in his ear.
“Bite?” Steve says softly, holding out a piece of chicken at the end of his chopsticks.
“Oh,” Eddie replies, surprised. “Are you sure? I can just eat mine.”
Steve shrugs, and for a split second, Eddie thinks he feels the briefest press of lips to his shoulder blade. “We can share,” Steve suggests.
Eddie turns his head just a bit, and their noses brush with the movement. Neither of them move away. “You just want to steal some of my orange chicken,” Eddie accuses teasingly.
Steve blinks, his eyes wide and innocent. “Who, me?”
And really, what happens next is all Steve’s fault.
He licks his lips, just a quick dart of tongue against chapped pink, and Eddie’s eyes drop to follow the movement, helpless.
When his eyes flick back up to meet Steve’s, the innocent look is gone, replaced by something darker, something more intense. Steve carefully sticks his chopsticks back into the carton of chicken and rice, his thumb coming to rub the back of Eddie’s hand, pushing it towards the table.
“Put it back,” Steve says quietly, no need for volume when his breath is already caressing Eddie’s ear.
Eddie obeys immediately, leaning forward and placing the carton back on the table before attempting to twist in Steve’s grip, desperate to face him, to see what will happen next. “Steve,” Eddie murmurs, a little annoyed at the lack of movement he’s being allowed.
Steve doesn’t let him struggle for long. He wiggles to the side of Eddie, pulling his left leg with him as he goes. Eddie hears himself whine sadly, but before he can lament the loss of Steve’s warmth properly, he’s shifting again, and suddenly Eddie has a lapful of Steve Harrington.
“Um,” Eddie says, very eloquently. Thank you, English degree.
Steve is staring down at him from his new perch, his eyes a little wild. His hands are shaking a bit as he brings them up to rest on Eddie’s shoulders, but his voice is calm when he speaks. “I know we decided this was a bad idea,” he says, his voice strong and even. “But, I also think that if I don’t kiss you within the next five minutes, I might die.”
Eddie cracks a grin at that. “You think so?”
Steve nods solemnly. “You can tell me to fuck off if you really don’t want to,” he whispers, leaning in close and brushing his lips against Eddie’s cheek, right where it dimples. “But I… I’ve been thinking about it all day, and…” he pauses, pulling back just a fraction. “I happened to be looking at the student handbook for the university.”
Eddie quirks an eyebrow at that. “Oh? You just happened to be looking at that?”
Steve’s face is definitely a little pink, but he nods, apparently committed to that version of the story. “Yes. And it says that student/professor relationships are frowned upon, but not technically illegal.”
“Oh yeah?” Eddie’s heart is racing. He’s certain he’s got this deer-in-the-headlights look on his face, one that Steve must be able to read as clear as day, even with the reading difficulties he definitely possesses.
“Yeah,” Steve nods. “And since you’re not technically my professor…” His lips drag down Eddie’s jaw, nipping gently when he gets close to Eddie’s ear. “And if this is just sex, not a relationship…”
Eddie’s stomach drops a little at that, and not in a sexy way. “Oh,” he says, struggling to keep the disappointment out of his voice. But of course it wouldn’t be anything past sex - Steve is young, attractive, a star member of the university’s basketball team. He could get anyone he wants to be in a relationship with him, of course he wouldn’t want Eddie. And as pathetic as it makes him, and as much as it hurts… he knows he’s going to let Steve have this. He’s going to give him what he wants, and when he’s through with him, Eddie will allow himself to be tossed aside like trash, even though he’s already halfway in love with the guy.
But it’s that love, that endless well of adoration and desire, that makes Eddie say, “okay.”
Even though it hurts.
“Yeah?” Steve mumbles against his jaw.
Even though it fucking stings.
“Yeah,” Eddie whispers back.
He lets that be the end of their exchanging of words, reaching a hand up into Steve’s hair to gently tilt his head, guiding their lips together in a deep, wet kiss. Steve makes a soft noise into the touch, and Eddie’s other hand falls down to rest on his hip, squeezing gently. His mouth moves softly against Steve’s at first, craving the tenderness of a kiss that he knows is living on borrowed time.
“Fuck,” Steve whispers against his mouth, pulling back just a little. “Do you think we could- would you-“ He stumbles over his words, making a frustrated noise before rutting his hips down into Eddie’s, making him groan loudly.
“Steve,” Eddie says through gritted teeth. “Fuck. Don’t- you shouldn’t do that.”
Steve whines, looking down at him with wide, pitiful eyes. “Why not?” He asks. He’s definitely pouting.
Eddie drops his head back against the couch, overwhelmed with the feeling of Steve in his lap and all his blood rushing south. “God. I don’t know,” Eddie whines back, clutching at Steve’s hips desperately. He scrambles to think of something, anything, to postpone this, even for a few minutes. “Our food,” he finally says, blinking up at Steve.
Steve raises his eyebrows. “Our food?” He asks.
“It’ll… get cold,” Eddie finishes lamely.
Steve snorts, and his lips work into a grin. “Fuck the food, you’ve got a microwave.”
He dives back in for a kiss again, and really, Eddie can’t argue with that logic. His hands map a path from Steve’s hips to the back pockets of his jeans, and he’s not shy about sticking his hands in there to squeeze a good handful. “Fuck, babe,” he groans, Steve nipping at his lips. “Such a nice ass,” he mumbles, tilting his head to catch Steve’s lips again.
Steve pulls back, making Eddie whine loudly. He’d be embarrassed if he had any blood left in his brain to encourage any sort of thought process. Steve grins above him. “You should see it without the jeans. I’ve been told it’s even better that way.” He’s so fucking smug about it that Eddie has to pull his stupid face in for another bruising kiss, more than a little jealous at the mere suggestion that anyone else is seeing Steve’s ass enough to have an opinion.
And that’s stupid, not to mention possessive, of Eddie to even think that, but here they are. He squeezes Steve’s ass again before pulling his hands out of his pockets, bringing his hands around to undo his button and zipper. “Are you sure?” Eddie asks, pausing there, giving Steve every chance to back out. “You can always change your mind, Stevie.”
Eddie isn’t sure what he’s expecting Steve to say to that, but it definitely isn’t a huffy, “I know what I want, Eddie.”
“Okay,” Eddie says softly, leaning in and kissing his cheek. “Tell me, then. What do you want?”
At that, Steve’s cheeks go a little red, though Eddie can’t for the life of him fathom why. It’s not like Steve has been shy up until this point. “I…” Steve trails off, but begins moving his hips in short little bursts of movement. “I want you to touch me.”
Eddie grins, and decides that if this is the only time he gets to have this, he can be a little mean. “Touch you where, baby?”
Steve whines, high in his throat. “Eddie,” he says softly. “Don’t be mean.”
And Eddie can’t help but kiss him for that. “Sorry,” he lies against his mouth. “Should we maybe go to my room? Or do you wanna do this on the couch?”
Steve freezes in his lap, which makes Eddie pull away instantly, looking up into his face for any sign of regret. “Um…” Steve starts, avoiding Eddie’s eyes.
“Honey, what is it?” Eddie asks as he rubs a soothing hand up and down Steve’s thigh. “Talk to me.”
“I’m not ready to fuck for real,” Steve says suddenly, the words bursting out of him in a rush of panic.
Eddie gives him a reassuring smile. “Okay,” he says immediately, bringing a hand up to pet Steve’s hair back. “That’s perfectly fine, baby. Thank you for telling me.”
Steve wiggles in his lap, twin hisses leaving their mouths at the sensation. “I still want to… do something, though.”
“Okay,” Eddie says. He pauses, thinking for a minute, before he smiles at Steve. “You ever jerked off with another guy before, Stevie?”
~~~
Predictably, Steve hasn’t done that, so that’s how they find themselves ten minutes later, both of their jeans and underwear pulled down to their thighs as Eddie strokes them off together with one hand. It’s incredibly hot, his gaze torn between watching the way his cock almost dwarfs Steve’s in his grip, and admiring the way Steve stares down at their dicks, his mouth wide open in shock.
“Does it feel pretty good, baby?” Eddie asks, smirking.
Steve nods dumbly, not a single word escaping his mouth. He’s blinking sort of rapidly, and Eddie wonders if his contacts are drying out. Normally, he’d stop to ask, but they’re both too damn close to worry about something like that right now.
Eddie tightens his grip a little, their dicks slippery enough with precome and spit that they slide together, making a disgusting, perfect sound. Eddie groans, flicking his wrist as he brings the both of them closer to the edge, his mind still not entirely wrapped around the fact that this is happening. They’re having sex. Literal, cocks touching, sharing breath and spit, sweaty sex.
And Eddie loves it.
He doesn’t know how the hell he’s supposed to give it up now that he’s had it, but he knows he’ll do whatever Steve wants, always. If he tells him ten minutes from now that he never wants to see Eddie again, Eddie would probably pack his bags. If Steve proposed, Eddie would say yes in a heartbeat.
Basically, there’s nothing Eddie wouldn’t do for him at this point.
“Close, close, close,” Steve chants, dropping his head back, presenting his neck to Eddie as he loses himself in the pleasure.
Eddie takes that as an opportunity to tilt forward, kissing and biting at the exposed column of Steve’s neck like his life depends on it. “Gonna come?” He mouths against Steve’s Adam’s apple.
“Yes, yes, Eddie, fuck, please,” Steve whines, his hips undulating as he tries to fuck himself against Eddie’s cock and the palm of his hand.
“Hm, if you’re good, I’ll let you come,” Eddie teases, slowing his stroking. He kisses his way up Steve’s throat, nibbling a little at his ear. “Are you gonna be good?”
“Yes, ‘m good, I’ll be s’good,” Steve pants. “Please!”
Eddie rewards him with picking up the pace and sucking a little mark under his ear, which makes him shudder. “Mm, so good using your manners, baby,” Eddie says, his voice breathy as he tries to stave off his own climax long enough for Steve to get his. “Come for me, babe. Make a mess.”
Apparently, that’s all it takes, and Steve is shooting off against their chests, the head of his dick nestled against the edge of Eddie’s. Something about it, the look on his face, the pulsing of Steve’s dick against his, or maybe the feeling of Steve’s come dripping down his cock, makes Eddie reach his. He comes so hard he almost thinks he’s going to black out, and he knows that’s all Steve.
“Fuck,” Steve whimpers, collapsing forward against Eddie’s chest, his head resting on Eddie’s shoulder. “That was so fucking hot,” he says with a light sigh, his body totally relaxed now.
Eddie laughs, his bones feeling like jello as he slumps against the couch, running his clean hand through Steve’s hair. “Did you like it?” He asks, a little nervous for the answer, despite the physical reaction he’d gotten out of Steve.
Steve snorts. “Did I like it?” He mocks, his eyes crinkling when he smiles at Eddie. “Of course I did. That was possibly the hottest thing that’s ever happened to me.”
And that makes Eddie nearly preen with pride. “Good,” he says. He’s still holding his right hand at an awkward angle, trying not to touch Steve with the same hand he used to jerk them both off. He glances down at Steve, who appears to be perfectly content staying there, with no sign that he intends to move anytime soon. “Hey, babe,” Eddie murmurs softly.
Steve makes a humming noise. “Yeah?”
Eddie kisses the top of his head. “How about we go get cleaned up? Would that be okay?”
“But I’m so comfy,” Steve protests weakly. He snuggles further into Eddie then, as if he’s proving his point. Instead, all this does is squish their soft cocks together and smears the come on their shirts.
“I know, but we’re kind of disgusting right now. And you can’t go home with your shirt looking like that,” Eddie explains.
Steve leans back a little, chewing his lip as he studies Eddie, a nervous tic. “Can I sleep here?”
Eddie blinks at him. “Uh… here as in… like on my couch?”
Steve’s face flickers with disappointment, but he shrugs. “Er, yeah, if that’s what you, um… yeah, that’s okay.” He stutters through what sounds like a couple different half-sentences, and Eddie can’t help but smile at him.
“Okay. Yeah, you can stay,” he says. He’d love it if Steve would just sleep in his bed, but he’s not sure that he would be comfortable with that idea. He puts the thought out of his mind, patting Steve’s back. “Okay, let’s go get cleaned, bud. And then I’ll make up the couch for you, and we can actually eat our dinner.”
Steve sighs quietly, and Eddie thinks for a terrible moment that he might change his mind, but then he says, “okay,” and shoves himself up to his feet. He looks down at his shirt, stained with both of their releases, and grimaces. “Uh, have you got a shirt I can borrow?” Steve asks.
Eddie has a very brief vision of Steve, wandering around wearing his clothes. Not even in a sexy way; no, he’s imagining Steve going to class, Eddie’s favorite Metallica tee hugging his broad shoulders. He wonders if everyone in the class would realize it wasn’t Steve’s shirt.
“Yeah,” he croaks out when he realizes Steve is staring at him, waiting. “Yeah, um. We can- there’s clothes in my room,” he says, feeling dumb for even saying that. Obviously that’s where his clothes are. God, he’s stupid.
Steve gives him a little smirk. “Lead the way,” he says easily, stepping back and waving his hand with a flourish.
Eddie shoves himself off the sofa, tucking himself back into his underwear but leaving his jeans unbuttoned. It feels like a lot to make the trip to his room like this, fucked out and filthy, with Steve Harrington trailing behind him, humming fucking - “Steve, is that ABBA?” Eddie asks, tilting his head back enough to look at him, allowing every bit of judgment to seep into his expression.
“Uh,” Steve stalls, and Eddie feels him step on his heel, probably on purpose. “Maybe.”
Eddie shakes his head as he tugs off his shirt, chucking it at the laundry basket in the corner of his bedroom as he steps inside. “Can’t believe you’re singing ABBA in this household. That’s basically sacrilege, you know.” He pilfers through his drawer of all his best band t-shirts, plucking out his very favorite and tossing it to Steve. “Don’t lose this, it’s my favorite,” he warns loudly without looking at him, going back to find himself something.
“Oh, I don’t- you don’t have to give me your favorite shirt, Eddie,” Steve says, despite the fact that he’s putting it on when Eddie turns around. “I’d wear whatever, really.”
And damn, Eddie was right. It really is a sight to see, Steve stood there in his t-shirt, looking at Eddie with those big beautiful eyes. If Eddie wasn’t so spent, his cock would probably be twitching in his pants.
“It’s fine,” he says, shucking off his jeans and grabbing a pair of sweatpants for each of them. “I wanted to see King Steve in a peasant’s clothing, at least once,” he jokes. He’s not sure Steve even remembers that, the whole “King Steve” joke from their high school days, but he doesn’t see the harm in it.
That is, until he catches a look at Steve’s devastated face.
“Stevie?” he asks softly, stepping closer to him. “Did I- what did I say?”
Steve shakes his head, dragging in a deep, shuddering breath. “N-nothing. Just… don’t call me that.” His voice is low, but serious, even as he adds a softer, “please.”
Eddie reaches out, relieved when Steve doesn’t flinch away from the contact. He grips his elbow, rubbing his thumb along the inside crease, and waits for Steve to meet his gaze. “Okay,” he says quietly, watching Steve as he watches his mouth. “I’m sorry, Steve. I didn’t think about it.”
Steve nods, and Eddie can’t help but coo when he steps closer for a hug. “Sorry,” Steve mumbles against his shoulder. “Hate bein’ sensitive about shit like that, but-”
“Hey, no,” Eddie says, pulling away just enough to get a good look at his face. “I want you to tell me when I cross a line, okay? Because sometimes I don’t realize it. Always tell me, alright?” He kisses Steve’s hair, subtle enough that hopefully he doesn’t even notice it.
“Okay,” Steve says quietly before tugging out of his embrace. It’s sooner than what Eddie prefers, and he aches to have him back in his arms the moment Steve is missing from them. He realizes he’s still just standing there in nothing but his ruined t-shirt and boxers, and the distinct embarrassment of being half-naked while Steve is fully dressed is enough to kick him into gear.
“Here,” Eddie says, holding out the extra pair of sweatpants after he’s tugged his own up his legs. “Unless you want to just sleep in your underwear,” he says, trying not to meet Steve’s eyes.
“These are fine, thanks,” Steve replies, and Eddie forces himself to look away when Steve begins tugging his jeans off.
A few minutes later, they’re both dressed in far more comfortable attire, and Eddie is starving. He leads the way back down the hall to the living room, scooping up their boxes of food and taking it straight to the kitchen to be reheated.
“We’ll have to start the movie over,” Steve says from behind him. When Eddie glances over his shoulder, he finds Steve standing there with his arms crossed, leaning against the doorway between the kitchen and living room.
Eddie grins as he sets the timer on the microwave. “You’re a man after my own heart, Stevie. I figured you’d try to pull the wool over my eyes and pretend you’d been paying attention the whole time.”
Steve rolls his eyes, but it’s playful. “Hard to pay attention when I’ve got you coming all over my cock, hotshot,” he says, smirking.
Eddie gulps, almost choking on his own spit as he turns to stare at the food rotating in the microwave. He’s not sure how to come back from that one, his brain moving too slowly in the wake of a good orgasm to even come up with a smooth retort. “Well,” Eddie says after an awkward moment of silence. “This time we have to pay attention to the movie. No distractions.”
The microwave beeps, and he carefully takes out the boxes, turning to find the smirk on Steve’s face hasn’t lessened. “No distractions. Scout’s honor.”
~~~
Scout’s honor, my ass, Eddie thinks nearly an hour later.
They’ve long since finished their food, and although Steve had managed to follow along the first part of the movie with minimal questions, Eddie can tell he’s losing patience, wiggling in his seat and casting glances at Eddie repeatedly. Eddie was serious though, he doesn’t stand for menial interruptions during Lord of the Rings time, and won’t pause it for anything less than an emergency.
“Eddie,” Steve whispers after another ten or so minutes of fidgeting.
Of course, hearing his soft voice, all of Eddie’s concerns fly straight out the window. He turns to him with a little smile, raising his eyebrows. “Yeah?”
Steve picks at a loose string at the seam of his borrowed sweatpants. “Can you pause it for just a second? I need to brush my teeth and stuff, in case I fall asleep.”
Eddie gives him a playful glare. “You can’t fall asleep during the movie, it’s against the rules!”
Steve rolls his eyes, but drops his head back and whines, playing along perfectly. “But I’m so sleepy,” he argues, batting those pretty little eyes at Eddie.
And of course Eddie can’t argue with that. “Okay, fine. I’ve probably got a spare toothbrush somewhere.” He starts to shove himself off the sofa, but Steve’s voice stops him.
“Oh, that’s okay, I’ve got one.”
Eddie pauses, turning slowly to look at Steve. He’s trying so, so hard not to grin. “You just happened to bring one with you?” He drawls, quirking an eyebrow at him.
Steve’s cheekbones flush with color, and Eddie can’t help but poke at them playfully. “Yes, I did,” Steve says petulantly, slapping Eddie’s pestering hands away.
“But you didn’t know you were staying the night,” Eddie says, feigning confusion.
Steve groans, finally breaking. He covers his face, but Eddie doesn’t let that last long, reaching forward and uncovering those beautiful hazel eyes immediately. “I didn’t, but I… I knew I was going to ask.”
Eddie coos at that, can’t help it really. “Aww, Stevie. How long had you been planning that?”
Apparently that’s a line he’s hesitant to cross, because Steve just looks away, back to plucking at the errant strings hanging off his borrowed pants. He shrugs, mumbling something that Eddie doesn’t quite catch.
“What was that, honey?” Eddie asks, reaching out and tugging at the loose thread Steve just released.
Steve sighs, a loud, almost put-upon sort of thing. “I said… I’ve had the toothbrush in my bag for like a week.” His face is decidedly pink now, and Eddie is so damn fond.
He knows he should laugh this off and move on, or try to at least, but one look at Steve’s embarrassed but hopeful face makes him bold. “All you had to do was ask, baby,” he says softly, patting Steve’s knee.
Steve fidgets again, turning so that his knees are pressed to Eddie’s thigh. “But last time, you acted like…” he trails off, somehow looking even more embarrassed than he did before. “Well, anyway,” he says, waving his hand dismissively.
Eddie doesn’t let it go that easily. “Like what?” He asks quietly, saving space for disappointment or regret, but understanding that this is about Steve’s feelings, not his own.
It takes a few long, awkwardly silent moments for Steve to actually make eye contact and respond. When he does finally look at him, Eddie tries to give him a reassuring smile. “It’s stupid,” Steve says, his gaze flickering between his hands and Eddie’s eyes.
“I seriously doubt that,” Eddie says, trying to be reassuring without being patronizing. “And even if it is, I still want to hear it.”
Steve studies his hands very carefully, picking at a hangnail with the utmost precision. He doesn’t meet Eddie’s eyes when he finally speaks. “I just feel like… like you maybe don’t want me around, sometimes.”
Eddie frowns, ducking his head so that he can say his next words with the full certainty that Steve can actually hear them. “Stevie, no,” he says firmly. He reaches for Steve’s hands, gently clasping each one in an attempt to get rid of Steve’s distraction. “I’m sorry that I ever made you feel like that.” He hesitates then, uncertain if he should say anything more vulnerable than that. And of course, what he should do very rarely matches up with what he’s going to do, and he finds himself opening his big stupid mouth again. “Really, Steve. I… If anything, I want you around more than I probably should.”
Steve sniffles, blinking those sweet hazel eyes up at Eddie with nothing short of doubt lurking in them. “Really?” he asks.
Eddie can’t help himself, leaning in and pressing a little kiss to Steve’s forehead. “Always. I want you around always.”
He’s not sure what to expect from the confession, but what he gets is Steve sniffling louder, his hand coming up to clutch at the back of Eddie’s neck. For a moment, Eddie panics, thinking Steve is about to pull him into a kiss, a kiss that he knows he won’t be able to put a stop to even if he tries, but instead, he just presses their foreheads together, taking a deep, settling breath. “Okay,” Steve murmurs.
It takes him a moment to collect himself, and even when he does pull away, he doesn’t remove his hand immediately. “You okay now?” Eddie asks.
Steve nods. “Yeah. I’m really sorry, I don’t know why I got so… I get sort of sappy after sex sometimes.”
“You don’t have to apologize,” Eddie says immediately, shaking his head. “Not for that, and not to me. This is a safe space, remember? You can say anything to me, always.”
A complicated look passes over Steve’s face then, and Eddie has never felt so scrutinized. He can almost imagine Steve walking through the caverns of his brain, inspecting every nook and cranny as he decides what’s worth keeping and what must be discarded. Eddie shivers, unsettled by the intensity of Steve’s expression, and that seems to be what snaps him out of whatever trance he’s in.
“I need to go brush my teeth,” Steve finally says, effectively breaking the tension.
Eddie feels a twin sense of relief and disappointment at that. It had almost felt like… for a moment there, he thought Steve was going to say something else. But surely if he had wanted to say something, he would have. Right?
“Okay,” Eddie replies, scooting away from him on the couch to give him space to go and do what he needs to do. He has a wild, purely self-indulgent thought as Steve is going to grab his bag, and common sense apparently isn’t enough to stop him from saying it. “Hey, if you want to, you can just leave your toothbrush here. That way you’ll have it for next time,” he says, glancing over at Steve and studying him carefully to see his reaction.
Luckily, Steve’s turned mostly towards Eddie, so he doesn’t have to repeat himself. Steve glances up at him, and his lips quirk into a shy smile. “Okay,” he says quietly. “I’ll put it with yours?” he asks.
Eddie nods, feeling a little giddy himself at the prospect. Which is completely ridiculous - something as stupid and simple as their toothbrushes being placed in the same cup is hardly worth freaking out over. And yet… “Perfect,” Eddie says, clearing his throat when his voice cracks.
Steve shuffles off to the bathroom, leaving Eddie alone with his thoughts. He’s not gone for very long, and Eddie has barely made it through one panic-driven cycle of “god, this is wrong, he’s my student, and he was uncomfortable with this at first - wait, what changed?” when Steve returns. He yawns widely as he walks in the room, and Eddie’s nose crinkles at the audible sound of his jaw popping.
“Ew,” he teases. “You’re like a snake, unhinging its jaw to eat a baby.”
Steve gives him a very unimpressed look as he settles back into his place on the couch. “Snakes do not eat babies,” he says with an air of such certainty that Eddie almost doesn’t want to tease him about it.
“Oh but that’s just what they want you to think!” Eddie says, trying to hide his massive grin.
“Sure,” Steve says, rolling his head to the side to give Eddie this little half-amused look. He yawns again, tilting to the side to rest his head on the arm of the sofa, and Eddie realizes how inconsiderate he’s being.
“Shit, I forgot, you’re like, actually tired, aren’t you?” he asks, moving to get up.
Steve’s eyes widen at that, and he tries to disagree, but Eddie can tell from his weak eyes and his posture that he’s exhausted. “No, really, we can finish the movie!” Steve tries, gesturing to the television with one hand.
Eddie shakes his head, standing up and clearing the coffee table of their mess. “Nah, we can finish it another time, bub. You need some sleep.” He takes the trash to the kitchen, washes his hands, and makes his way back to the living room, where Steve is still half-laying down on the couch. “C’mon, gotta take your contacts out,” he reminds him.
Steve grimaces at that, but sits up. “Will you help me? It still kind of grosses me out to do it on my own.”
“Of course,” Eddie replies. “Are your glasses in your bag?”
“Yeah, should be in the case at the top. Contact case is in there, too.”
Eddie dutifully digs it out of the bag, coming to settle on the edge of the coffee table directly in front of Steve once he’s got it. “Alright, hold still,” he murmurs softly before reaching out. He’s gotten the hang of this in the several times Steve has asked for his help, and he’s definitely better at removing the contacts than he is at putting them in for him, so he’s glad that Steve’s mostly got that part down pat. Now that his brain is on that wave length, a nagging thought from earlier returns to his mind. “So… when you go to the ear doctor…” he starts slowly, then pauses when Steve tenses.
“Yeah?” Steve asks when Eddie is quiet for a beat too long.
“If you don’t want to talk about this, we don’t have to,” Eddie says softly.
Steve blinks at him, squinting without the assistance of his contacts, and Eddie can’t help but find it incredibly adorable. “It’s fine,” Steve says with a shrug. “No point in beating around the bush. Like… It’s happening.”
Eddie nods. “Right.” He clears his throat and hands Steve his glasses. “But when it does… Are you prepared for them to tell you that you might need something for that? Like…” He doesn’t want to come right out and say it, a little weary of scaring Steve, or just hurting his feelings.
Luckily, he doesn’t have to have that concern for long, as Steve fills in the blanks for him. “Like a hearing aid?” he guesses.
Letting out the breath he’d definitely been holding, Eddie says, “yeah. Like that. I know it’s just partial hearing loss… Or, well, I think that’s what it is, but… if they say that’s the best option, are you comfortable with that?”
Steve is quiet for a long time. If he wasn’t sitting up, his gaze flickering around the room as he thinks, Eddie would think that he’d fallen asleep. He looks sort of lost, and Eddie can’t even begin to imagine what sort of thoughts are racing through his mind. Eventually, his shoulders slump in what Eddie can only describe as resignation, and he sighs. “I… I guess I’ll have to be,” he says quietly.
Eddie is quick to do what he does best, jumping in to reassure him. “Hey, no. If you don’t want to, I’ll press them for another solution. But… if it’s that or surgery…” he gives Steve a sympathetic look.
Steve knocks his ankles against Eddie’s, staring down at their feet. “I don’t want people looking at me,” he whispers.
Eddie almost responds with a joke, but he knows better now. He knows how sensitive Steve is about these things (rightfully so) and so he knows that would just make it worse. “Why do you think they would be looking at you?” Eddie says, trying to choose his words very carefully. “I’m pretty certain they make relatively discreet aids, so people probably wouldn’t even notice.”
“Maybe,” Steve says noncommittally with a shrug. “But… I don’t want people to look at me… and all they see is the glasses and a hearing aid. Especially…” he rolls his eyes, mostly at himself, and gives Eddie a sardonic smile. “This is stupid, but like… I really don’t want people coming to our basketball games and saying, like… ‘Oh, there goes that deaf kid, who can’t see the ball coming at his face! And did you know he can’t fucking read?’ Like…” he shakes his head. “I don’t want that to be my legacy.”
And Eddie doesn’t really get it, not really. He’s not a member of any sport or club, and even being in a band, he doesn’t think he’s ever particularly given a shit what people thought of him, even though he is a little different, but he supposes that’s just the difference in their personalities. He tries to level with him, and see it through his eyes. “Yeah…” Eddie says slowly. “But baby,” he leans in, putting his hands on Steve’s knees and squeezing. “That’s not going to be your legacy. People are going to remember you because you were an amazing player, yeah, but you know what I’ll remember about you?”
Steve almost seems shy when he asks, “what?”
Eddie smiles at him, reaching up and tucking his hair over his ear. “I’ll remember that you were kind. And hardworking.” He begins counting things off using Steve’s fingers. “Honest, caring, funny, smart.”
Steve’s eyes are wet. “Eddie,” he says softly, like he’s denying it.
Eddie shakes his head, bringing his hand up to his mouth to kiss his palm. “I’m going to remember that you were brave,” he says gently, holding Steve’s gaze. “That you came to me and Murray for extra help, even though you were embarrassed. That you came back to me, even when I had fucked up and said everything wrong, because you chose to be brave enough to let someone help you.” He brushes his lips across Steve’s knuckles. “I’m not going to remember you for your glasses, or for having something in your ear, if that’s what they decide to do. I’m going to remember you, Steve.”
He means it to be reassuring, a pep talk of sorts, but Steve is fully crying by the end of it.
Great. Scratch “motivational speaker” off any potential future career plans.
At first he can’t tell if they’re sad tears or not, but then Steve is lurching forward, wrapping his arms around Eddie’s neck and muffling his tears against his shoulder. It takes him a few minutes of sniffling to get it under control, but Eddie gives him that time, holding him in a loose embrace and stroking his back gently. “Sorry,” Steve mumbles, not so subtly wiping his nose against Eddie’s shirt. “That was just - really fucking sweet, Eddie. I…” He pulls out of his grip for just a moment, giving him a shaky smile. “Thank you. I really needed that.”
Eddie kisses his cheek. “No problem. I’m always here when you need a pep talk. And maybe next time I won’t make you cry,” he jokes softly, thumbing at a stray tear on Steve’s cheek.
Steve just laughs, naturally good-natured about that. “Yeah, we’ll see,” he teases.
Eddie gives him another warm smile before sighing and standing up. “Let me go get you a couple of blankets, yeah?”
Something like disappointment flashes across Steve’s face for a second, but then he’s nodding, watching Eddie disappear down the hall. When he returns with a stack of blankets and a pillow, Steve offers a little half-smile. “Thanks,” he says, watching Eddie as he spreads a sheet across the couch, fluffing a pillow up at one end.
“You want me to tuck you in, baby?” Eddie asks, mostly joking.
Steve gives him that sweet smile, his eyelashes batting softly against his cheekbones as he nods. “Yeah, that would be nice, actually.”
It’s decidedly innocent, and means nothing more than Steve just being silly and seeking some form of comfort, but for some reason, Eddie’s face heats up. “Okay,” he says after an awkward pause. “Um… Lay down?”
Steve does just that, scooting around until he’s resting his head against the pillow, his glasses going a bit wonky on his face. “Can you-” he starts, turning his head a bit.
Eddie nods, reaching out and sliding the frames off Steve’s nose and setting them on the coffee table. “Better?”
“Yeah,” Steve says softly. He’s looking up at Eddie with those big doe eyes, and Eddie has to force himself to look away.
He drapes the fuzzy blanket over Steve first, followed by a quilt his grandmother had made before he was ever born. It’s old and is made up entirely of mis-matched patches of plaid and denim, but it’s probably the most sentimental item he owns. “Warm enough?”
Steve nods. “Mhm.” He looks awful cozy in his spot, and Eddie allows himself to be selfish one more time for the night as he leans in and presses a kiss to his forehead.
“Alright. Goodnight, bub. If you need anything, I’m just down the hall,” Eddie says, giving Steve one last look-over to make sure he’s as snug as he can be. He waits for Steve’s quiet hum of agreement, and then he’s retreating to his bedroom, giving Steve one last look over his shoulder before he disappears from his view for the night.
Behind the almost-closed door, Eddie sighs. God, he wishes he’d just have the guts to ask Steve to sleep in here, with him. Not in a sexual way or anything - no, Eddie just wanted to know what it would be like to cuddle with him for a night, to wake up wrapped in each other’s arms. He huffs and puffs to himself as he crawls into his lonely, empty bed, glaring up at the ceiling as soon as his head hits the pillow. It’s not fair, really. Steve being so close, yet so far away. Perfectly within reach, but also very much inaccessible.
He sighs again, louder this time, as if anyone will hear his passive-aggressive moping.
It occurs to him, vaguely, that he could just go right back down the hall and ask Steve if he’d like to sleep in a real bed rather than the couch. And honestly, even if he says no, what does Eddie have to lose? It’s not like Steve’s going to leave in the middle of the night. Then again, Eddie would hate to even make him uncomfortable enough to even think about that… He goes back and forth several times before ultimately deciding - fuck it. Nothing to lose, might as well give it a shot.
He crosses the space between his bed and the door quickly and quietly, a singular thought in his mind as he reaches for the doorknob.
Eddie has just barely pulled the door open when he bumps into something - or rather, someone.
“Oh, shit, I-” he starts to apologize immediately, then pauses when he registers that of course it’s Steve standing in front of his door. His face is drawn comically around an expression of panic, and Eddie tilts his head at him curiously. “Oh. What were you…” he trails off. It would be a little hypocritical of him to start asking questions about motives now, considering what he was just on his way to do himself.
“Um,” Steve says, his eyes wide. Eddie probably nearly gave him a heart attack, swinging the door open like that before the poor guy could even get the chance to knock. “I got… scared?” he tries, the words coming out more like a question than any real statement of fact.
Eddie can’t help his instinct to tease. Crossing his arms and leaning against the door frame, he says, “oh, did you?”
Steve blushes. “Um… yeah. It’s like… really dark in there, and… and your fridge makes weird noises, and…”
“Hm,” Eddie says, sucking at his teeth like he’s considering the issue. “Well, that’s no good. I can’t possibly leave you out there all alone to fend for yourself against the… fridge noises.” He can’t help but grin as he says it, and can’t bother regretting it when Steve just blushes harder.
He half-expects Steve to give it up then, out of embarrassment if nothing else, but if there’s one thing about him, it’s that he’ll always see something through. Instead, he just nods, casting a weary glance back down the hall. In doing that, Eddie finally notices that Steve’s got the quilt wrapped around his shoulders. Cute.
“Yeah, it would be really… really irresponsible for you to leave me out there all alone. I think I’d be way safer if I…” he seems to lose confidence then, but the longing glance he sends to Eddie’s bed over his shoulder makes his intentions crystal clear.
“I think you’ll just have to sleep in here with me tonight,” Eddie says, feigning disappointment. “Well, come on, then. I hear the fridge likes to claim its victims this time of night,” he says with a grin, gesturing for Steve to come into his bedroom.
Steve makes it a few steps towards his bed before he turns around, giving Eddie an almost desperate look. “You don’t mind me being in here, do you? Because, like, I can sleep by myself! I just-”
Eddie reaches for him, pulling him in via a tug on the quilt. “Honey. I promise I don’t mind. Actually…” He laughs at himself, shaking his head. “That’s why I was already at my door. I was actually about to come in there and ask if you wanted to sleep in here with me. I felt so guilty leaving you in there with just some blankets and a pillow.”
Steve’s face, which had brightened a little at the confession, falls again by the time Eddie finishes speaking. “Oh,” he says, glancing down. “Well, I mean, I don’t mind. I can sleep on the couch, I really don’t have to-”
“Stevie,” Eddie says, his voice full of exasperation. “Baby, I want you to sleep in here with me. I…” he hesitates, feeling that familiar uncertainty that comes with the prospect of being vulnerable to Steve in some way. “I think it would be nice, to not be alone, and… and it would be even better if it was you I was being not-alone with.”
“Oh,” Steve repeats, his voice even softer now. “Okay, then. Should we, um…” He glances at the bed, but his gaze doesn’t linger. Instead it darts all over the room, taking everything in as if he believes it’ll be the last time he sees it. Eddie hopes, selfishly, that it’s not.
“Let’s go to bed,” Eddie says, nodding. He uses his grip on Steve’s quilt-cape to guide him to the bed, walking backwards himself until the back of his knees hit the mattress. He releases Steve just long enough to crawl up onto the bed, patting the empty space beside him as he wiggles under the covers. “C’mon, I don’t bite,” he says, grinning at Steve. “Well, much.”
Steve rolls his eyes, but crawls onto the bed, keeping the quilt wrapped around his shoulders like he’s some kind of little caterpillar. Eddie helps him under the actual sheets and comforter, but Steve seems to have no intentions of letting go of the quilt anytime soon.
Once they’re settled, both of them on their sides facing each other, Eddie yawns. His jaw pops, and they share a grin at the sound. “Like a snake,” Steve murmurs.
It’s silly, but Eddie’s heart swells at the reference to his joke from earlier. “Like a snake,” he echoes.
Steve’s eyes are drooping with exhaustion, and Eddie knows it’s just a matter of time before he loses him to the clutches of sleep. His throat sticks with words he shouldn’t even feel the urge to say, and he clears his throat a few times in an attempt to speak.
“Goodnight, Eddie,” Steve whispers, beating him to the punch.
Eddie nods, feeling ridiculous at the swell of emotion that rises in his throat. Oh, god. He’s really got it bad for him, there’s no way around it.
“Goodnight, Stevie. Sweet dreams.”
Eddie doesn’t sleep a wink.
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seospicybin · 3 years
Text
GAP.
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PART III
I.N x reader. (s,f)
Chapters: Part I / Part II / Part IV / Final
Synopsis: Jeongin made sure you’ll never treat him like a little brother again. (2,9k words)
It had been almost a month since the last time Jeongin saw you, he got his hopes up when Chan mentioned that you would come to the bowling game.
"She just texted me, said she couldn't come!" Chan announced in the middle of the game.
Changbin groaned, "I miss having her around,"
Chan shrugged, "she's been busy lately," as he wiped the bowling ball with a rag.
Jeongin slumped in his seat, feeling lethargic all of the sudden. He thought of things that probably went wrong when he was with you, was it something he said? Or something he did that could cause your absence?
Every thought that crossed his mind led up to the one moment where he conveyed his feeling to you that night, he should have known it would burden you, and he felt so stupid for it. He pulled out his phone and thinking of sending you a text message yet, he knows it would be better to talk to you in person to avoid any misunderstanding.
"Hyung, I'm going," he announced to Chan and Changbin.
"Where are you going?" Changbin asked.
Jeongin got up from his seat and put on his coat, "I have to do something,"
"I'll go with you then," Changbin offered, but Chan stopped him.
"Just let me know if you would be home late, okay?" Chan ordered.
Jeongin nodded, "sure," he answered, then picked up his wallet and phone from the table, "I'm going," then left the bowling alley.
Jeongin was afraid of his choice of time to come to your place, it was past midnight, and you probably were sleeping right now. Should he bail? He asked the question over and over again with eyes staring blankly at your apartment door.
His curiosity got the best of him, and his finger pushed the doorbell. He unconsciously held his breath the whole time he waited for the door to get answered. His heart almost skipped a beat when the door swung open, and you appeared from behind that door,
"Hey!" You greeted.
It took everything in him not to hug you right then and there, he missed you so much that when he saw your smile, his heart felt like bursting into a million pieces.
"Come in!" You told him, stepped to the side to let him in your place.
"Sorry for taking so long to open the door," you said as both of your went inside your place, "I was showering,"
"I thought you're already sleeping," he said, as he took off his coat and placed it on the stool next to the kitchen island.
You shook your head, "you want something to drink?" You offered, opening the door of the fridge, "Beers?" You asked, showing a can of beer to him.
"Sure," he replied, even though he wasn't feeling thirsty.
You brought the cans of beer and sat on the stool next to him, and Jeongin was quick to open the can of beer and hand it to you.
"Thank you," you muttered.
Jeongin opened his can and took a small sip.
"So, how's the bowling?" You asked with a sigh.
Jeongin took another sip before he could answer, "it was fun," he said, "it would be fun if you were there too," he added with a smile.
You chuckled, "I wish!" You said with a sigh, "I've been busy with work,"
You were always so lively and cheerful, and Jeongin got so sad that your eyes were heavy with exhaustion, and you sounded so restless, "is it that hard, Noona?" He asked out of the blue.
"You mean working?" You asked him with a chuckle, "Yes, but I got bills to pay, so," you drew in a sharp breath.
Jeongin sensed the bitterness in your words.
You glanced at him and suddenly felt so bad for giving him such a straightforward answer, "everyone has their own struggles, Jeongin! And you have your own struggles too, but it's okay, we'll get through it!" You comforted him and hoped it was enough to lighten up the mood.
Jeongin went quiet, and you quickly came up with something to ask him, "So, what brings you here?"
Jeongin hummed, "I just wanted to know if you're okay,"
You felt touched by his genuine intention, "I'm a bit tired, but I'm okay," you said to him, propping a hand under your chin and looking at him, "how are you?"
"I'm good," he replied.
You smiled at him, "Great!"
You took a sip of your beer as the silence hung in the air again.
Jeongin braved himself to ask you the things that had been bothering me all these times, "Noona," he started.
Your head snapped in his direction, "yes?"
"I've been wanting to ask you this," he licked his lower lip to draw him some more time to prepare himself, "when I told you that I like you, was it a burden?"
You looked at him with a puzzled look on your face. Yeah, you remembered sleeping with him, and he uttered his feelings during the sex, but you doubted it was for a real thing, so you took it half-heartedly.
"No, it was never a burden to me," you answered, "and I always like you, Jeongin,"
Jeongin smiled and let out a sigh of relief.
"But do you ever think that maybe..." you tried to put your words nicely to avoid hurting his feelings, "what you feel for me is probably a short-lived infatuation?"
Jeongin felt a twinge on his heart when you said it, deep down, he knew you would never take his feeling seriously.
You shortly placed your hand on his, “Jeongin, please, don't take this the wrong way,” you pleaded, “if you put yourself in my place, I think you would understand why I asked you that,”
Jeongin went quiet. It was clear to him that you are older than him and that there were a lot of things to think about, but he felt certain about his feelings and that it was real, it was love.
"Noona, I like you, and I want to be with you," he said it with his eyes deeply staring into yours, "And this is not just some silly crush. I want you, I want us to be in a relationship," he was panting once he finished talking.
You looked at him intently and smiled, "you want to be in a relationship with me?" you repeated his words to confirm that you heard him just right.
"Yes," he replied without a beat.
You chuckled at how eager he sounded, "But I'm hard to please, and I'm fickle," you teased him.
"I don't care," he said
"I'm a lot to handle sometimes," you said to him as you closed in on his face.
He shook his head, "I'll be a patient boyfriend for you,"
You try something else, "I have a lot of male co-workers,"
"Then I'm jealous of them for being able to spend 8 hours with you that you could have spent it with me," he said with a smirk.
You laughed, "I'm sorry I doubted your feelings for a moment. I just had to make sure,"
He closed his eyes and sighed, "I like you, Noona. And it's okay if you don't feel the same way, but please give me a chance?" He asked, his dark eyes sparkling under the fluorescent light.
You nodded, "alright,"
A smile bloomed on his face, "Can I kiss you?"
He looked so cute when he asked for your permission like that and got you instantly nodded at his request.
You closed your eyes the moment you saw him leaning in to kiss you, you felt his soft, plush lips pressing on yours, and his hand gently held the back of your neck.
He sighed the second you opened your mouth to him, his tongue swirling around and tangled it with yours.
You slowly pushed him away, feeling your lungs burning due to the lack of oxygen, “I need to breathe,” you explained.
He combed your damp hair with his fingers, "You must be tired," he said as he saw through your clouded eyes.
"A little bit," you lied. Somehow the kiss made you feel less weary than before.
"Let me take care of you, Noona," he said with a soft smile as he put a strand of hair behind your ear.
You raised an eyebrow at him, unsure what he meant by that.
He got up from the stool and held out his hand at you. You hesitantly took it, and he led you to your bedroom then lay you down on the bed.
"Just lay back," he ordered, and you obeyed.
He kissed you once and twice, you didn't even aware that he was taking your clothes off in the process until the cold night air touched your skin.
He kissed down your neck and chest, briefly sucking on your breasts before continuing his trail of wet kisses down south.
Jeongin dragged his lips along your abdomen, tugging at the waistband of your underwear, sending you sat up straight in a second.
"Jeongin, you don't have to," you said to him.
He lifted his head, his dark, foxy eyes looking straight at you, "I'll take care of you, Noona, don't worry," he said, then gave you a short kiss on the lips.
He pulled down your underwear, and you lifted your hips to help him take it off of you.
You swallowed as he parted your legs open for him, you saw him swallowed at the sight of your flushed, tender core.
You held your breath when Jeongin lowered his head between your legs, biting your lips at the anticipation of what going to happen next.
Jeongin glanced at you and saw your cheeks got red, "you're so beautiful, Noona," he said.
You weren't sure how to react to his praise when his head hovered inches away from your cunt, you smiled at him instead.
Jeongin turned his head to the side and placed kisses down your inner thigh, and every kiss lasted longer than the previous one. He stopped when he got too close to your core. He turned to the other side, dragging his mouth down your inner thigh and again, retracted his mouth once it got too close to your core.
You whimpered, it felt like your blood rushed to your core, and it was aching for him the longer he teased you.
He ran a finger down your slit and you gasped at the sudden contact, he did it a few more times until you got so wet.
"So wet," he murmured as he shoved his fingers to taste your arousal.
Jeongin grew impatient the longer he watched your core getting drenched by the second, he sank his mouth on your core at once.
And you let out a long sigh when you finally felt his hot mouth on your cunt.
You couldn’t take your eyes off of his plush, red lips savoring your cunt and the way he seemed so enjoying it with his eyes closed that you could see his dark lashes rested along with his lids.
Jeongin didn't hesitate to slurp on your essence and licked every drop of it, your hand reached for his head and tangled your fingers in his dark locks.
"Jeongin," you breathlessly called him.
He glanced at you, and you lazily scratched his scalp with your fingers, "that feels so good, baby," you said to him so he didn't mistake your silence again.
Jeongin felt a tingle inside at the pet name you just called him with, he sucked on your cunt a little too hard out of excitement, causing you to cry out and pull at his hair.
He rubbed your thighs as he started to stick his tongue in and out of your hole, while his other hand slipped under your leg, and rested it on the small of your back.
Your breath quickened, and it felt like your body syncing itself with him, you shamelessly grinding yourself against his mouth.
He took that as a signal that he was doing a great job at it, he kept sucking and slurping on your arousal, once in a while pressing his nose on your clit while his tongue was busily protruding your hole.
Your moans became louder and raspier, "Baby, I'm so close," you told him between your moans.
Jeongin picked up the pace, his tongue mercilessly licking, he opened his mouth wider to take your whole cunt and sucked it so hard until you let out a high-pitched moan, but he didn't stop, he kept on doing whatever he could to make you cum.
If it wasn't his hand keeping your legs open, you would've clamped his head between your legs, and he could feel your legs trembling in his grip.
"Baby, oh," you yelped, your head lolled to the side when you climaxed, "Jeongin, baby," you screamed as he sucked on your cunt one more time to finally get himself off of you.
You collapsed on the bed, body convulsing as a flow of overwhelming pleasure rushed through you.
He lay down next to you and kissed the top of your shoulder, putting a hand around you to calm you down.
You turned around to face him, mouth searched for him with your half-shut eyes, and placed a long sloppy kiss on his lips with the taste of your own arousal.
“You take care of me really well," you said to him. You could barely keep your eyes open, heavy with drowsiness.
You kissed him again, "can you stay with me tonight?" You asked him.
Jeongin smiled at the offer, for a moment he thought you wouldn't ask him that.
"Sure," he answered.
You let yourself melt into his embrace, and he pulled up the duvet over your body, "Goodnight, Noona," he whispered to you with his hand rubbing your back to lull you to sleep.
When Jeongin woke up the next day, he got frantic to find himself alone on the bed. He reluctantly got up and looked around your room, trying to find any sign of where you might be.
A moment later, you appeared from the bathroom already dressed for work, you beamed a smile at him the moment you saw him awake on the bed.
You walked up to him and crawled onto the bed, "Good morning," you greeted, placing a quick peck on his lips.
Jeongin smiled back, feeling so relieved that you hadn't left for work yet, "Good morning, Noona!" He slurred his greeting, "why didn’t you wake me up?"
"You sleep so tight. I couldn't bring myself to wake you up," you answered, combing his tousled hair to the back with your fingers, "you look so cute when you're sleeping," you added.
He glared at you, "I told you not to call me that," he said then flipped you over and pinned you down on the bed.
You giggled and closed your eyes as he leaned in for a kiss, the kiss lingered for a moment before he dragged his mouth down your neck.
"Whatever you're trying to do, you better do it quickly because I have to go to work," you told him.
"Don't go," He whined at you and being so adorable doing so.
"I have bills to pay," you whined back.
You glided your hands down his body and eventually landed on his morning wood.
Jeongin hummed when he felt your hand on his erection, he brought your hand inside his pants to let you hold it, "what are you going to do about it, Noona?"
You pushed him down on the bed, "I'll take care of it, of course!" You said.
You pulled his pants down enough to let his cock out of his boxer, you licked your palm wet enough with spit then began slowly pumping it down his length.
Jeongin put a hand under your head and pulled you close against him.
You set a steady pace of your pumps along his length and watched him getting relaxed by the second with lips connected with yours.
With one hand, he unbuttoned the top two buttons of your shirt so he could cup your breast with his hand. He continuously moaned into your mouth as his breath quickened, and you hastened the pace of your pumps on his cock.
You yelped when he roughly grabbed your breast as he reached his climax, his heavy sigh felt hot on your cheek.
He placed a slobbering kiss on the corner of your mouth, "I'll provide for you, Noona. You don't have to work anymore," he casually said.
You burst out laughing on the top of his head, "Tempting," you slyly remarked.
You drew your hand and licked cum that dribbled down the back of your hand and around fingers, you maintained eye contact with him when you were doing it.
He took your hand and kissed the back of your hand, "don’t go," he begged, sulking like a child.
You sat up and started buttoning your shirt back, you would be lying if you didn't feel the slightest bit sad for leaving him as you looked down at his beautiful bare face and weakly smiled at him, "I'll give you the passcode to my place and you can come whenever you want, okay?" You said to him.
Jeongin felt giddy at the promise of having free access to your place whenever he pleases, but that means a lot more because you trust him enough to do that, "Okay," he agreed.
Your smile grew wider as the compromise was a success, then gave him a long peck on the lips before finally getting up from the bed.
He caught your wrist to stop you and said, "Have a good day at work, Noona," with that sweet smile of his.
taglist: @nvcki
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notnahoya · 2 years
Text
- p 1 h a r m o n y -
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ first kiss...
warnings : none !!
AN : Im very sorry ive been gone for so long, ive been very busy !! please request, i need ideas !!
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🍙.... theo
you and theo had been at the fair all day, it was night now, you guys went on the faris wheel, theo had looked at you and smiled, "what? is something wrong?" you said looking back at him, he shook his head no. you and theo have been dating for a few months but you guys never actually, kissed or even really hugged each other. you guys had been talking about how your date went. you had this sparkle in your eyes that he loved so much, he wanted to kiss you so bad. "can i kiss you?" he said, with a look on his face that said he was being serious, "if you want to, you can" you said smiling. you were about to start talking when you felt his lips on yours, his lips were plump and soft like you imagined, and his lips fit perfectly with yours, you pulled away and looked at him. he just smiled and looked away. "why did you wanna kiss me?" you asked just wondering why he did it, "no reason, just felt like it" he said looking at you, you guys slept at your own dorms that night, but the warmth of his lips left a mark on you....
🍙.... keeho
you had been dating keeho for exactly 5 months, you had always wondered what it would be like to kiss him, his lips always looked so plump and soft. keeho invited you over to his dorm cause he wasn't busy that day, of course you went over. you got over there around 5PM and you guys just talked and cuddled each other, you guys were always busy and never got to see each other. you guys had just got done eating and went back to his room and started listening to music, "hey, do you ever just stare at people's lips? just like cause they look so soft and plump and nice to touch or kiss" you said hoping he'd get the hint, he did, he leaned down and kissed you, the kiss sent electric waves through your body, it was so magical. "there." he said knowing you had been staring at his lips all day long, you smiled and blushed a little, you cuddled up into each other's embrace and fell asleep
🍙.... jiung
you and jiung were at the park and it was around sunset, "the sunset is pretty, not as pretty as you though" he said smiling, "god, your so cheesy" you said with a laugh, you guys were talking, just watching the sunset. you were telling him about your family. he was staring at you lips "can i kiss you?" he asked holding your hand, you didn't answer, you just went in and kissed him, his lips were so soft, you never thought they would be, but they were. you guys went back home and watched a movie
🍙.... intak
you and intak went to the mall, not for anything in particular, just for fun. "ooo, this looks nice, im gonna try it on!" you said grabbing a dark red dress and heading to the dressing room. you put it on and realized that it was rather tight, showing your curves. you walked out of the dressing room "intak look!" you said with a big smile, intak looked up from his phone "woah..." he said looking at your curves, he got up, walked you to somewhere more private and kissed you. you were shocked at first but eventually you kissed back, when he pulled away he was very flustered. "what was that for?" you said with a small laugh, "you look good in that dress" he said with a slight blush on his cheeks. he paid for the dress and you guys went home.
🍙.... soul
you and soul had went to the store, cause soul wanted to do some painting that day. you guys went home and laid the paint out in yard and set out the paint and canvases, "soul, im gonna go get changed, okay?" you said so he knows where your going to be. you went and got changed into some old clothes from school. when you went back outside to see soul covered in paint. "oh, hey Y/N" he said standing up "soul, dont you even think about it" you said backing away from him, he some how sneaked his way behind you, he wrapped his arms around your waist, "to late" he said with a big smile, "soul please let me go!" you said squirming around to get out of his grip, "only if you give me a kiss" he said, he had been wanting to ask for a kiss for so long, but was to shy. "promise you'll let me go if i do?" you said not believing him, he nodded. next thing he knows your lips are on his, he was shocked so he didn't kiss back automatically. once you pulled away, he was shocked that you acted like nothing happened. he let go and you guys decided that you guys were done for the day, and went inside.
🍙.... jongseob
you and jongseob had went to the skate park. "jongseob, im gonna fall!" you said standing on his skateboard trying not to fall, even though you were holding onto his arms for dear life. "no you wont, i promise" he said reassuring you that you wouldn't fall. he instructed you on what to do in order to ride the skateboard, after maybe 30 minutes of falling flat on your butt, you finally were able to keep your balance. "jongseob, look!" you said ridding the board with ease, "good job! are you ready to go home?" he said but you didn't hear a word he said, you were so happy that you ran up to him and kissed him. the kiss lasted for maybe 1-2 minutes. you pulled away, "sorry.." you said looking down, "no, your okay! i liked that!" he said smiling, "really?!" you said, he nodded. you guys walked home and stayed at home the rest of the day.
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hi my lovelys! please enjoy this! i hope you guys stay safe and drink and eat!
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bubblyhoney · 3 years
Note
sarah i have thought of another fic request or like a cute idea i guess! i didn’t have anyone in mind when i thought of it so you can write it for whoever you want honestly :)
okay so the reader is a streamer but streams games like animal crossing, standew valley, etc. then (insert who you’re writing for) says they don’t like that game, but later ends up buying it and the reader is like “i thought you said you didn’t like this game” and they’re like “well i like you” and they confuses their feelings and they end up playing the game together and reader gives them a tour of their island or farm
i feel like this request isn’t good, but the scenario seemed cute and i wanted to share it. sorry if this is confusing or just too specific cuz i know it can be hard to write requests like that! but yeah i hope it gives you inspiration and you like the request <3
new horizons
warnings: language, a Marvel reference (hint: natasha said it about tony), stupid idiots who don’t realize they like each other, use of pet names, Uno rage, Hasan Piker's presence
words: 1473
tags: sapnap x gn!reader
A/N: i’ve been trying to catch up a little on my requests (i’ve only got a couple so i’m not super overwhelmed) but school and outside life has been taking up most of my time so this one took me a while to make! tbh— ive never played animal crossing so i did google some of the game mechanics and i apologize if anything is inaccurate about the game…. but i liked relaxing and writing this cute one so thank you for requesting hails :3
requests/inbox status: open
-
“This game is trash.”
Your head quirks, fingers stopped on the screen. You’re in the process of giving your character a cute new nickname; it’s kind of hard to decide between “awkward dude” and “elderly skater”.
“Excuse me?” Your chat comes alive with emotes and ‘KEKW’s, obviously entertained by you and your almost-more-than-friends-friend.
There’s a story for that later.
Sapnap’s rough laugh comes through your headset and he audibly swallows, the sound of a water bottle dropping onto his desk echoing.
“I’m just saying—it’s boring. It’s like Minecraft but you don’t like… do anything.” The grainy image of his bearded face shifts and you see him pull out his phone.
“It’s— you can’t even compare it to Minecraft! It’s a completely different game system—you actually interact with other people live in the game.” You huff out a dramatic sigh, slumping in your chair with a pout. “Just because you go into this lucid state where all you know is ‘touch block, hit George’ doesn’t mean this game isn’t fun.” (He scoffs at your awful impression of his voice. Your viewers love it.)
“Jeez,” he mumbles, fumbling with the cap of his water bottle. “Touched a nerve there, bud.”
You roll your eyes, getting back to the village in the game.
“Don't ‘bud’ me.”
The call falls comfortably quiet, the sounds of him tapping obsessively on his phone and you clicking away filling the silence. A gentle bedroom-pop YouTube playlist remains in the background, prompting you to hum along and glance at the chat to see a flood of “check twitter” and “Y/N TWITTER!!”.
“What happened on Twitter?” You mumble, confused, and pull the website up on another monitor. Sapnap just makes a curious noise, swinging back and forth in a circle. “Oh my God,” you say to yourself, fingertips brushing your parted lips.
“What?”
“Hasan Piker just followed me and retweeted one of my not even remotely political old tweets. Like from a year ago.”
“That’s— wow. Congrats?” Sapnap’s voice cracks, and his ears flush pink the tiniest bit when you glance at his face on Discord.
“I’m gonna go on record and say that he could get it.” You shake your head in disbelief.
Sapnap falls uncharacteristically non-hyper-verbal, so you look past the frenzied chat and to his screen— wait. He muted and turned his camera off.
“Um,” you start, furiously typing question marks in your private chat. “Where’d you go?” You mute and turn screen share off for your stream, concerned that he might’ve fallen off his chair and broken his neck and needs you to call the ambulance.
The characteristic ding of a twitter notification sounds through your bedroom, and you look at your phone quickly.
“That’s where I went.”
Sapnap Tweeted: “all Y/U stans can choke on my dick”.
“Jesus, Sapnap,” you say, and rapidly refresh to read the replies. This tweet was deleted. “That’s so— that barely makes sense, bro. Why— literally what?”
His snicker floods your ears and you relax in your chair. Crisis: averted. “Don’t fucking— what’s wrong with you?”
“I thought it would be funny,” he offers, shrugging, and fiddles with the straw in his water bottle, smile fading. “And also Hasan pisses me off.”
“Why, ‘cause he wants a piece of this? Jealous?” You think back to your viewers, knowing they’re probably spamming question marks and coming to ludacris conclusions about both of your absences. No offense to them. You remember your stan days very vividly.
“I mean, kinda.” He rubs once at his nose, glancing at the camera (and what feels like you) before taking a sip from his water bottle.
“Wow.” You watch one strand of his hair fall from beneath his hat and brush against his full eyebrows. “I’m uh—I’ll get back to my stream. You coming? Or is it time for a Sapnap-snack?”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” He snorts and leans his chin onto the balance of his arm.
“That means you like to take a little snack break mid-stream and come back approximately nine hours later and you didn’t even eat.”
“You know what— fuck you.” He flicks the camera as you laugh at the look on his face.
The teasing mood is easily kept as you switch games from Animal Crossing to Uno, all the while slamming Sapnap with +4’s and skipping the newly-arrived BadBoyHalo at any chance you can get. It unironically pisses him off and he has to take a Sapnap-snack break midway through (only a fifteen minute break this time, during which you and Bad take a “What Kind of Bread Are You?” quiz). The rest of the night is filled with devious cackles (you), loud and sudden bangs that sound suspiciously like someone hitting their desk in anger (Sap) and the stupid barking of Rat, AKA Lucy (Bad). She’s cute but a menace to the sound quality of Bad’s microphone. You sign off stream around 2 a.m. with various forms of thanks and kisses blown to the camera. It’s been a refreshing night, actually; you’ve been busy organizing a partnership stream all week and all your friends have been busy filming or editing or what-not. Quackity had time for a little Roblox every couple of days, though. He’s got your back.
The next time you see Sapnap is after a two hour stream of him try-harding in Valorant and you finishing responding to an email from your partnership in the VC.
“Okay, I’m back.” You hear him shift in his chair and click a couple more times on his keyboard. You perk up in your chair, closing the email browser you’d been looking at.
“Do you want to play anything else? I’m down for anything.”
“Absolutely not Uno. You can go to hell for giving me 6 cards that one time,” he jabs. You scoff, crossing your arms and leaning back in your chair.
“Okay, the +4 was on me but it’s Bad who gave you the last two. That’s not my fault, sweetie.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he mumbles, trailing off as the clicking of his keyboard stops. “Hey, um—Guess what?”
Your heart beats loud in your ears at the tone of his voice. He sounds nervous; that’s never good.
“I’m scared to guess,” you try, playing with a little Minecraft dog figurine you have on your desk with fidgety fingers. “What?”
“I bought Animal Crossing.”
Silence. You stare at his discord icon blankly, trying to reroute the wires of your brain.
“Tell me you love it.”
“Well… I haven’t actually played it— but you said you liked it, so.”
“So,” you repeat him, ears warming but continuing on. “Is that what you tell all your friends when you buy something they like? That it's because of them?”
He seems to choose his next words carefully, pausing a beat to consider your questions.
“Well, I don’t have a crush on all of my friends.”
“You—what?” You stutter, caught off guard and stumbling. What did he just say? “Don’t tell me you mean you have a crush on me.”
“I’m almost positive I just did.” His discord icon stares right back at you, taunting.
“You know, you’re very casual for someone who just admitted they like-like me.” Your cheeks flush pink and you have to press a hand to your chest to keep your breathing sounding stable.
“Yeah, I’m kind of cool like that,” he offers, a huff of a laugh punctuating his statement. The conversation moves into a lull that you can’t help but know is because of you. He must expect you to say something about it, right?
“You are very cool, Sapnap.” You tilt back in your chair, sucking in a breath to prepare yourself for your next words. “And—Isortakindofhaveacrushonyoutoo.”
He must understand you, for you can hear the grin in his voice when he asks “Really?”
“Y-yeah.” You feel like a preteen again, all shaky and giddy in front of the boy you just asked to a middle school dance.
“Um, alright. What do we do now?”
“I don’t know,” you answer genuinely and swing in a happy little circle in your chair. “We could play Animal Crossing.”
“I’m down.”
You swear you’ve never heard more beautiful words.
He keeps his camera off for most of the time you two play, too focused on creating his island and asking you questions about how to fish to turn it on. He silently flips it on when you help him decorate his lawn, needing to show you in real-time the decorations he has bought and where you think he should put them. He looks cute. I mean, of course he does. He always does.
You tell him goodbye late in the night, eyes saying a little more than just “see you tomorrow”.
You like him. He likes you.
It’s even better when you two have matching gardens.
-
A/N: anybody and everybody (especially my precious hailey) let me know what you think!! :]
301 notes · View notes
sanzuslover · 3 years
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daddy tonight
shigaraki tomura x all mights daughter reader
warnings: yandere behavior, stalking, death threats, misogyny?, kidnapping, non-con, domestic abuse, daddy kink, ect.
<3
you were all might’s daughter, everyone fancied you, you shined bright like the stars. shigaraki hated you so much, you were 2 years younger than him, 18, yet you were still a popular and successful hero.
you were ridiculously hot, but that wasn’t all…you were literally his most hated hero daughter, shigaraki had been stalking you ever since you were 14, he was young too so he didn’t see anything wrong with it.
it was a miracle how he didn’t decay you, he could if he wanted to, maybe when you were younger but definitely not now, now you were a hero a real hero and not one in training.
he had smelled your panties and stolen your belongings in various occasions but you never seemed to notice— of course someone like you wouldn’t.
shigaraki wrote everything down about you, he studied and observed you a lot, but lately he can’t since you turned 18 and there’s a lot of other men dying to marry you, who wouldn’t wanna marry all might’s daughter?
ever since you turned 18, you’ve been acting like those dumb whores he hated, shigaraki is a man who is always busy so he still is a virgin, it made him mad how there’s a small possibility that you aren’t one.
it would be unfair he thought to himself, he waited all these years for you yet all you did was go on live tv and show the whole world your very tight hero suit and that cute innocent little face.
you always blushed when being interviewed, he thought it was cute but only him should see you like that, you always looked so needy, like a whore.
he could tell you were a daddy’s girl, always whining and crying when things didn’t go the way you wanted them to— he thought you and him both had that in common.
its 6:38 pm as shigaraki plays with his cock, he keeps on stroking his manhood till he cums all over your face, well the poster in his room that has your face on it.
“i actually am dating someone!” you say
shigaraki almost broke his scarred neck and he looked over to the tv screen and saw you and a man…what? what could you be doing with him? shigarki couldn’t understand.
you smile and blush at the camera and the man puts his hands around your waist, he brings his handsome face close to yours and kisses you, you of course kiss him back, the lady interviewing you cheer you both on.
shigaraki hands fly to his neck and he starts scratching and crying at what he’s seeing right now, how dare you? how dare you (name)? he still can’t understand why.
“…this brat…i need to go now!” shigaraki yells.
he grabs his coat and leaves the new lov hideout, he doesn’t know why but he feels he has been a little too nice to you, you’re taking him for granted.
shigaraki arrives and waits for you, its early and he knows for a fact that you’ll be here late so he just waits in your house, he decayed your front door.
you were a bit drunk and your boyfriend senju had left you, you get in your car and drive back to your house, your dress was so tight it made you mad so you took it off.
you prayed and begged nobody saw you like this, what would people say if they say all might’s daughter with only a bra and panties, they were sexy too.
it was late at night so you could barely see and so it made you calm down a bit since you were almost naked, you went in your bag searching for your keys but almost died as you say your door…it was gone?
“hah what the hell” you whisper to yourself and walked in
you wish you didn’t since now someone was chaining you with some anti-quirk chains, you screamed at the person but they only laughed, the lights were turned off so you couldn’t see them.
“S-STOP Y-YOU WHAT ARE YOU DOING???! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM” you said
the person— man now laughs and your stomach now hurts from it, he was a villain, you could tell with that laugh of his, he came close to your ear, his hot breath hit your ear.
“of course i know who you are (name)” he said slowly
you screamed and started moving trying to fight against him but it didn’t work, he only laughed at how pathetic you looked trying to push him off.
“come here, i won’t hurt you” he whispered in your ear and you just cried and closed your eyes
he grabbed you and pulled you up the stairs where your room was at, he laid you down on your bed and locked the door, he then turned on the light.
you instantly cried when you saw him, he was the villain who invaded ua— the school your dad worked with. he started laughing like a psychopath.
“…that face, ive waited years to see you like that” he said and sized you up and down
you shook your head and cried even more.
“i can’t believe you became such a slut, wearing that really? are you trying to provoke me?” he said as he walked closer to you, he touched your hair with 3 of his fingers
“…(name) do you know who i am?” he asked
“…y-yes” you told him
“no, do you know who i REALLY am?” he asked and looked you in the eyes
you only shook your head and he smiled at that, he started taking his shirt and pants off, you looked at him confused, he was getting naked.
“s-stop!” you told him
you started to move around but shigaraki quickly sat on top of you, he looked at you and you cringed, you shook your head ‘no’ and he laughed.
he grabbed your face with 4 fingers and looked you in the eyes, your eyes looked so innocent and pleading to him, he creepily smiled when you started gagging.
“hahahahah hahahah, so…you smelled me right? i haven’t showered in weeks!” he told you in a mean manner
you gagged and looked at him as if he was the ugliest creature ever to exist.
“plwease ewa you’re so smelly! and ugly! get off me!” you screamed and cried but shigaraki had enough of you
he slapped you and pulled down your panties, he started pumping his 2 bony fingers into you in a unpleasant and fast manner, you cried even more.
“S-STOWPP!” you yelled
“hah, don’t you EVER treat me like that bitch or i’ll kill you!” he yelled back at you
you gasped and looked at him with a scared face, he was threatening to kill you…he wouldn’t do it right? he could end your life with all 5 of his fingers, it terrified you.
“n-no s-sorry…” you whispered and shook your head trying to convince him
“im going to hurt you real bad if you act all naughty now” he warned you
you started to cry and moan when he kept on scissoring you with his fingers, he did it so rough and to his surprise you were really tight, he smiled at this.
he started kissing your cunt and he pulled his fingers out of you, you felt empty and he chuckled when he saw your disappointed face.
he kept on kissing and tongue fucking your pussy so hard and good that you couldn’t stop crying and moaning, this was like heaven to him.
“you like it don’t ya” he asked you
you moaned and cried out to him but this made him mad, what did you do wrong? you should be the one mad, not him.
“when i ask a question you answer me…got that!” he slightly yelled at you
“mhm!” you screamed and cried when he slapped your pussy, it hurts so much.
“s-sir shigaraki” you said and he slapped your pussy again, causing you to moan and cry
“it’s tenko” he said
“h-huh?” you asked, he looked at you and told you
“i said call me tenko” he said and then started rubbing his fingers up and down your cunt.
“ah~uh” you moaned
“imagine what all might must think if he saw you like this…getting fingered by a villain…” he evilly stated
you started crying and screaming at the thought of that, you were a hero…getting fingered by a villain, a villain who hates your dad, how disappointing.
shigaraki turned you around and pushed his dick all the way up your pussy, he then grabbed your hair and whispered in your ear
“your daddy must be proud don’t ya think?” he whispered
you shook your head ‘no’
“doesn’t matter cause from now on im your daddy” he laughed and pulled your hair even more
“w-what do you want ah~” you moaned
“y-you” shigaraki was slightly out of breath, your body looked so perfect like this, all for him.
“w-what do you mean?” you nervously questioned
“you know w-what i mean ah” he moaned as he started slamming faster into you, your ass bounced on his belly and he smiled at this.
“so good~” he whispered
“ah AH t-there!” you moaned and whined, shigaraki groaned.
“so fucking good for me ngh” he moaned, yet all you could think about was your father, it was killing you.
you were getting off to a villain fucking you, how disgusting. you should be ashamed of yourself, what if he came in you?
“hey pay attention bitch!” shigaraki snapped his fingers at you “can’t believe you’re ignoring me”
“s-sowy” you cried and shigaraki pulled out and flipped you over, his hair hitting your face, he was sweating and so were you.
you’re cheeks and lips were red, his cheeks were red too. he then started to put his very long veiny dick in your pussy, he groaned.
“ah~ yes… a woman like you deserves to be treated like a slut…not a hero” he told you as he looked you directly in the eyes, his look was so intimidating.
you whined when he said that, you knew, well more like you believed that if you were a boy all might and everyone else would be way more proud of you.
“i-its hurts s-sir tenko” you whined for him and he started aggressively slamming his hips into you “AHHH~ T-TENKO!”
“mhm i knew you would like this, you’re such a dirty girl, call me daddy” he groaned out, he watched as your tits moved up and down, so hot.
you thought about it, he’s literally fucking you without your permission! he came and disintegrated your door, it was expensive! how will your dad react to thi-
“AGH NGHH D-DADDY, TENKO S-STAWP” you moaned with tears in your eyes and shigaraki drooled all over your tits and stomach, it was so nasty.
“mhm, my good girl, i see you’re learning your place…” he said and a feeling inside your stomach started growing, it felt so hot and you knew what was gonna happen.
“im g-gonna i-ima cum!” you moan out and cum on his dick, your pussy clenched around his dick in a filthy way, how file of you.
“uh-uh what a bad girl…and here i thought you were behaving good” shigaraki told you with a dry laugh, your eyes widened in fear as his hand came to grab your neck.
with tears in your eyes you looked up to him, his bloody eyes were staring into your soul, you started shaking and gasping for air, you thought he was going to kill you.
“i could kill you right now if i wanted to…” he told you and looked down to your red glossy lips “but i won’t…never”.
he forcefully kissed you and you allowed him to since you were scared he was going to disintegrate you, it was a horrifying thought.
he moaned into the kiss, he was waiting for this, to feel your lips on his, even if it was by force…he doesn’t regret anything at all, he loves it all.
with his free hand, he started playing with your right breast, he pinched your nipples and you opened your mouth to protest but shigaraki just inserted his tongue into your mouth.
you arched your back and started kissing him back, the feeling was good but it was bad, this felt like a sin, a very dirty and taunting sin.
he then let go off your neck, and allowed you to finally breathe, it felt good but then he started pulling it in, again, you both moaned.
he started moving, it hurt, he was going a little too fast and the look in his face scared you, he looked as if he going to kill you, what did you do wrong?
tomura had remembered why he even came here…because of that damn tall handsome male, he was jealous and he lost control, something in him was telling him to punish you— that you deserved this.
“you know, i was mad at you…no…i AM mad at you! how dare you go with that brat…he doesn’t deserve you, no one does!” he screamed at you with angry eyes, he then started pulling out of you.
“w-wha-“ you tried to talk but he shushed you and sat on the right side of the bed, he grabbed a fist full of your hair and looked at you in the eyes while talking.
“i spent almost my whole life loving you! and this…this is how you repay me! how embarrassing of me to fall in love with the daughter of the person i most hate in the world! i hate everything and everyone!”
you shook at his words, your tears were falling down your face like a lake, your lashes were wet and scalp was in pain, he was gripping your hair a bit too tight.
“i’ll kill him, everyone! him, your dad, all of them!” he screamed and then started crying.
“don’t you understand…? these heroes, your dad, they don’t love you! i did and do everything for you! yet all you is be ungrateful, i’ll make you learn!”
he pulled you by the hair and off the bed, he pushed you on your knees and forced your mouth opened, you started crying even more and trying to stand up but couldn’t when he pushed his dick all the way in your mouth, down to your throat.
“a-ah yes…now you’re being useful! you need to understand that im the only person who loves you” he said and you looked up to him through your thick lashes and rosy cheeks.
you looked so cute, like always, he thought he could take a picture of you and so he let go of your hair and grabbed his phone that was on the bed, you started shaking and asking questions but he just shut you up with his dick, again.
“i love you but you gotta learn” he said and started pushing your head up and down…faster and faster until he came, it felt so good and he pulled out to let some of his cum fall on your face.
“aww don’t look at me like that, smile, all heroes smile right!?” he said and slapped you when you didn’t smile, you cried and obeyed him this time.
“good good…” he said as he took a picture of you with a sad smile, you looked so hot, all for him, oh and your dad.
“i wonder what all might would say if he saw this…” shigaraki tormented you, you cried and begged him not to show anyone the picture.
“t-tenko p-pwease n-no…” you cried and crawled to him, he looked down on you and kissed you, you kissed back, scared.
he picked you up and sat you on the bed, he told you to go to sleep, but you shook your head ‘no’.
“(name), i said go to sleep” he said as he walked over to you, he got a blanket and covered you with it, he didn’t take off the chains on your wrists.
“…i w-won’t tell anyone about this…just please…don’t show my dad that picture, tenko” you looked at him with sad eyes.
“…okay” he whispered
shigaraki wanted to laugh in your face but, he decided to be nice and so he turned off the lights, and waited for you to go to sleep, and so when you did, he turned on his phone.
everything was going to be so good now, he’ll finally have you, he’s going to cum in you and breed you, he knows you’ll be a great mom.
he laughed at the thought of how all might and everyone would react to this, what expression would all might do if he saw your belly growing, his grandchildren will be the children of a villain, the one who hates him the most.
shigaraki looked at your beautiful sleeping face and smiled, he planted a kissed on your forehead and looked for all might’s number on his phone, he had it since he stalked you.
he clicked on it and send it to him, shigaraki laughed at this, would you get in trouble? doesn’t matter cause tonight he’s your daddy.
{end}
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erin-bo-berin · 4 years
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Prove It
MASTERLIST
This was an anon request of Spencer getting mad at being teased and being motivated enough to prove he’s not vanilla. This took forever from the time it was first requested for me to write and post it, so I’m so sorry to the anon who requested it. It feels like it’s been FOREVER since I’ve posted a smut too, so enjoy some smutty Spencer to start your week. Happy reading!
Spencer Reid/Reader
Rating: M (smut, rough sex)
Word Count: 4,246
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“I will never understand it.”
“Understand what?” you asked.
You sat down in one of the chairs in the jet, across from coworker and teammate Derek Morgan.
You and the team you were a part of, the Behavioral Analysis Unit—BAU for short—of the FBI had just solved another case and were on the way home.
You’d seen plenty of sickos before, so another one didn’t seem to surprise you. Of course, it was disgusting and aggravating, horrifying and awful, but you never pretended to understand unsubs in the first place. So you were quite curious about what Morgan was thinking out loud about.
Spencer Reid plopped down in the chair next to you with his cup of coffee.
How the man managed to live off coffee and actually go to sleep was a mystery to you. At this point it would benefit him to just have his coffee injected into him through IV, that’s how much he consumed.
“This S&M stuff,” Morgan waved his hand, “It’s insane.”
The case they’d just recently closed had involved a guy who had taken his violent sexual desires a step too far and found himself turned on by actually murdering women. Whether it was by choking or gagging, somehow he’d discovered he got a sexual release from killing his female partners.
What started as auto erotic asphyxiation—something that was incredibly dangerous to begin with—had turned to something more sinister and even more deadly.
“When done right, it’s actually not as bad as some of these unsubs make us believe,” Spencer said.
“I’m sure you know all about it, don’t you kid?” Morgan replied, sarcastically.
“Anyway,” he continued, before Spencer could cut in again, “I’m not judging people who do it, it just seems like even when it’s done right, it’s too dangerous to even be exciting. It’d be a mood killer for me.”
“Oh don’t tell me you don’t bring out your dominant side every once and awhile,” you smirked, teasing him.
“Hey, I’m all for some good rough sex. I’m not as vanilla as pretty boy here, but I’m not about to emotionally and physically scar Savannah.”
“Hey! What’s that’s supposed to mean?!” Spencer protested.
Savannah was Morgan’s wife, now of three years. They had a son together, Hank. Being a parent according to Morgan, you didn’t get much “mommy and daddy time”, but even then, it didn’t stop him from shamelessly sharing details about his sex life. You got used to it; it was just a Derek thing anyway.
“Sure, I’ve done some tying up and spanking, but that’s mild compared to some practices in BDSM. I once asked Reid about it and unfortunately learned more than I ever wanted to about it.”
“Excuse me,” Spencer broke in, “What’s the vanilla remark supposed to mean?”
Both yours and Derek’s heads turned to see Spencer’s brows furrowed.
“Kid, vanilla ice cream is spicier than you,” Morgan teased.
“Oh come on, that’s not true!” Spencer retorted, exasperated.
“I’m sorry Reid, I just can’t imagine you being kinky. I mean do you just spout facts during sex or what?”
You held back a snicker although you heard the rest of the team chuckling.
“No, I don’t,” Spencer flushed.
You averted your eyes from his gaze.
You and Spencer had been dating for a little while, the team none the wiser to your relationship. You couldn’t quite defend him without giving it away.
It wasn’t really a secret per se, you just mutually decided not to say anything until it became more serious. You had only slept together a few times anyway, so it wasn’t like you were familiar with his sexual proclivities.
“You’re more vanilla than Vanilla Ice,” Morgan joked, making you choke on your sip of water, laughing.
“How would you know anyway?” Spencer crossed his arms, his face now a deep red, “I could be kinkier than you know.”
“Dude, when’s the last time you even slept with a girl?” Morgan asked with a raised brow, “Wasn’t it that bartender Austin from a case 11 years ago?”
Spencer pressed his lips together tightly. He wasn’t going to say anything and you knew it because it would give away yours and his personal business.
“That’s what I thought. Vanilla,” Derek laughed, standing to refill his tumbler with more whiskey, “Don’t worry Pretty Ricky, not everyone has to be an animal in bed.”
He patted Spencer’s shoulder as he walked by to head to the back of the jet—and the whiskey decanter.
You could tell by Spencer’s pursed lips that he was annoyed.
You promised yourself that when the jet landed, you would apologize.
You had been wrong.
Spencer wasn’t annoyed.
He was pissed.
“Spencer, I’m sorry,” you repeated for the hundredth time.
Once the jet had landed, everyone went their separate ways, so no one was the wiser when you’d climbed into Spencer’s car. You had spent more time at his place lately than your own, so you were heading back to his apartment with him.
The entire drive was filled with tense silence. His jaw stayed clenched all the way home.
“Spence, please talk to me. If I hurt your feelings, that wasn’t my intention.”
You followed him into his apartment, watching as he sat down his go bag and satchel by the door. You sat your own things near his, as well.
You didn’t miss how tense he was, indicating his anger.
“Spence-” you began, but got cut off by his sharp tone.
“Go into the bedroom, take off all your clothes and get on the bed,” he snapped.
You were taken back, unsure if you’d heard him right the first time.
“What?”
“I said, go into the bedroom, take off all your clothes and get on the bed. I won’t repeat myself. And don’t make me do it myself cause you will regret it.”
You stood frozen in place for a second, your mouth opening and closing. By the look on his face, you could tell he was serious. 
“O-Okay,” you stammered, walking backwards to the bedroom.
You had no idea what he had planned, but deep down, you could feel the tingle of excitement beginning to work its way to the surface. Maybe some rough sex would ease his anger.
You were out of your shirt and pants before you reached the bed. You pulled off your bra, letting it fall from your fingertips and then rid your underwear before climbing onto the bed like you were asked to do, laying back.
It was at least a good ten minutes before Spencer came into the room, with something in each hand.
“What’s that?”
He didn’t answer you. 
He sat what appeared to be a glass of ice on the nightstand and grabbed one of your wrists, starting to tie it to the bedpost with what you now realized was one of his ties.
You watched as he tied the opposite one before you spoke.
“Spence, I-”
“Quiet. I don’t want to hear another word from you unless I say to speak,” he growled, climbing onto the bed, hovering over you.
His face lingered above yours, his lips not far from your own. He didn’t kiss you yet, but you could feel his warm breath fanning over your face, the anticipation of his lips finally being on yours making you anxious. 
His nose nudged yours gently as he pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, his eyes lidded, although they occasionally flicked up toward yours. He knew how much you wanted him to kiss you and he was using that to his advantage.
Finally, it came, feather light. It was like kissing a cloud, the faint touch not nearly enough to satiate your needs. You tried to lean upwards to meet his lips again, taking what you wanted, what you needed, but he pulled out of your reach, a wicked smirk on his face.
“Oh so this is how it’s going to be?” you mock pouted.
“My bed, my rules,” he answered.
The anticipation of this kiss made your heart race and your breath hitch. If he was willing enough to deprive you this easily and this early on, what else was he capable of?
When his lips finally met yours, it was in a surprisingly gentle manner, considering you were currently tied to his bedposts. His mouth glided along with yours, the intensity picking up rather quickly. 
His hunger and anger seemed to meld into one as he kissed you roughly, pulling back enough to capture your lower lip between his, his teeth softly scraping over it. A small, satisfied sigh emitted from you, against his lips.
Your mouth parted as you continued to enjoy the feel of his mouth on yours, his tongue being both graceful and teasing at the same time, it moving swiftly over your bottom lip.
You were already struggling with your restraints, wanting to touch him as he kissed you. Normally, your touch was everywhere on him when you kissed. From his face to his shoulders and chest and in his curls, you ravished being able to touch him. But you didn’t have that luxury right now and it was absolutely killing you.
He pulled away, lips hovering over your jaw as he kissed it just slightly, ready to move on to other areas.
“By the time I’m done with you, you’ll have more than enough proof that I’m anything but vanilla,” he whispered huskily, placing a kiss against your throat.
Your thighs clamped inadvertently as you suddenly became even more turned on than you had been previously. He reached over you, towards the ice, grabbing a cube.
You watched him intently, gasping sharply when the shock of cold touched your skin, just along your collarbone.
“You gonna be a good girl and do what I say?” he asked, sliding the ice cube along your chest.
You nodded eagerly, biting down on your lip as he moved the ice over the swell of your breast and across your nipple making them tighten, both from the cold and your arousal. His lips followed the trail of ice over your breasts, tongue moving out to encircle your nipple and flick it. He repeated it on the opposite side and you gave a moan of approval at his explorations.
A trail of water was left behind on your skin as he continued on, gliding the ice down the middle of your chest towards your stomach. You felt goosebumps prickle your skin at the continuous icy cold sensation.
“You’re so hot, you’re making the ice melt quickly,” he purred.
His touch left you as he reached back towards the nightstand to grab another cube. Apparently he’d been right, as the first cube had melted completely. 
Once the coolness touched your skin again you found yourself gasping. As tantalizing as this teasing was, you were extremely turned on by it. You could feel the heat within your body, your core already starting to pulsate with arousal.
“I really hate that I can’t touch you,” you groaned, tugging on your restraints.
“But that’s what makes it fun, sweetheart,” he grinned, placing a kiss on your stomach.
The ice cube moved down one of your sides, over your hip, where he gave it a playful squeeze. Then the cold hit the top of your thighs, his other hand gliding to the top of the opposite one.
You were desperate at the point and automatically widened the space between your legs. If anything, you were going to let him get a good view of just how wet you were.
His eyes flickered downwards then back up towards your face, a satisfied smirk on his lips. You squirmed, anxious for him to do anything.
“Problem, love?” he cooed.
You glared, arching your hips in an attempt to get some sort of contact.
He chuckled, spreading your legs further. You weren’t sure what you were expecting, but the ice moving over your outer lips definitely wasn’t it.
You hissed at the sudden cold, but you didn’t hate it at all. Not like you hated these fucking restraints. You cursed when he pressed it against your clit.
“Fuck, that feels good,” you moaned.
He hummed, looking up at you through his lashes. You groaned in frustration, throwing your head back against the pillow, tugging at your bound wrists again.
You wanted to push his head or his hands to your throbbing core; maybe both at this rate.
“Spencer, please,” you whimpered.
“Okay,” he relented, sitting back on his heels, “You’ve been a good girl so far.”
He reached over you, pulling the knotted ties loose from around your wrists. It was like sweet freedom to you. 
Before you could even touch him, he’d taken a hold of you, rolling you over so you were straddling his stomach.
“Ooh, I’m in control? I like,” you grinned, leaning down to kiss him.
You didn’t quite make it to his lips.
“Think again.”
He grabbed the back of your thighs, roughly pulling you up to sit on his face. This, you hadn’t suspected.
“Oh god,” you moaned lowly as his tongue slid up your outer lips.
His hands held your thighs tightly and he wasted no time diving right in. His tongue flicked your clit and you had to grab a hold of the headboard just to make sure you didn’t collapse on top of him.
Of course oral sex had been a part of your sex life with Spencer prior to this, but never in this way. He was usually more timid about it. But right now, he went for it in a very enthusiastic manner.
“Fuck, Spence.”
You groaned, his lips circling your clit to suck on it briefly before releasing it with a tiny pop of his mouth. His tongue flicked over it again, alternating in speed and pressure.
You had thought it couldn’t get any better until you felt a finger slide into you. You could’ve sworn you almost lost your mind at that point. His finger slowly pumped in and out of you, matching the now slower speed of his tongue that seemed to be licking everywhere but your clit.
“Dammit Spencer,” you groaned, slightly grinding against his mouth for some friction.
You jerked a bit, a surprised squeal coming from you when his hand came down on your ass. It wasn’t a bad reaction though, it had just excited you even more.
“Did you just spank me?!” you asked incredulously.
He hummed, sending a delicious vibration against your clit as his hand came down again on your ass making you moan loudly.
You had no idea there was this side to him.
“Fuck, Spencer, yes baby,” you whined, your hips moving back and forth over his face as his fingers and tongue drove you crazy.
The faster his fingers went, the harder his tongue moved. You were gripping the headboard so tight, your knuckles were white.
“Ah!” you squealed, at an additional spank.
It wasn’t hard enough to be too rough and painful, just hard enough to be incredibly sexy, sending a charge directly to your currently, extremely stimulated clit.
It was also incredibly appealing to you to feel the slight scratch of his facial hair against your nether regions as he ravished you. 
You could feel your entire body tensing, preparing for the rush of adrenaline and ecstasy. Apparently, Spencer could too.
He worked you until you came shattering apart above him. His name mixed with a loud moan and curses sprinkled in.
When the high had ebbed a bit, he moved you back to sit on his stomach, a wolfish grin on his face. You still felt a bit dazed since there was still a bit of buzz left tingling within you.
You noticed then that your boyfriend was way overdressed.
“It’s time to do something about these,” you mumbled, unbuttoning his dress shirt, “You’ve got too many clothes on.”
He allowed you to pull his shirt off, but his hand grabbed yours just as they reached for his belt.
“I am going to fuck you bent over my desk and only bent over my desk.”
He gave you no time to react as he’d already lifted you in his arms and stood from the bed, heading to the living room.
“Spencer, what? I-”
The words died on your lips as he entered the living room and his desk came into view. Normally, it was stacked neatly with his books, files, paperwork that he needed to complete, pens, pencils, a couple of coffee mugs, the works. But now, it was completely clear, showing off its deep, dark brown, glossy desktop.
Heat pooled in your stomach when you realized he’d planned ahead for this. He’d imagined bending you over his desk, having his way with you. You swallowed back a moan, already eager for him to be buried inside of you.
Instead of immediately pushing you over the edge of the desk, he sat you on top of it, facing him.
You bit your lip, quite literally looking up through your lashes at him. His tongue moved over his lips, his hunger for you apparent as his hands traced every inch of you.
From your breasts, down your stomach, to your thighs and around towards your bottom, squeezing it gently, his hands traveled every part of you before capturing your mouth in another kiss.
It was no innocent kiss. It was fiery and filled with the mutual hunger for one another. He was still kissing you when he slid you off the desktop, your feet touching the floor once again.
He turned you and had you bent over the edge of his desk in a matter of seconds. You heard the clink and whir of his belt as he unbuckled it, the sound alone sending a charge through you.
You shifted impatiently, much to his notice. He smirked, running a hand between your legs teasingly, as he pushed his suit pants out of the way with the other hand.
He wasted no time on gentle and loving movements. He entered you roughly and quite honestly, when you weren’t expecting it.
You whimpered. The feeling of your most intimate parts stretching just enough to accommodate him was one of the best feelings in the world to you. 
By this point, you’d lost the ability to be quiet. He’d already brought you to one earth shattering orgasm and that was after the tantalizing ice foreplay that had turned you on beyond belief.
Your constant moans filled the room as your hands gripped the edges of the desk.
Your hips were tight in his grip as he thrust into you fast and hard, your own body bouncing off his in the opposite direction. He, for one, was much louder than he normally was. Grunts, groans, mumbled curses and pants came from behind you as he had his way with you.
His lips hovered over your neck, his appraising moans ringing in your ears.
“Fucking shit, fuuuck, Y/N,” he groaned before attaching his lips to your neck.
He sucked harshly, hard enough to know that hickies would be present for the next few days.
You inhaled sharply, feeling the slight sting of his teeth bearing down into your shoulder, but coupled with your current pleasure, it was actually hot.
Your back arched as he focused on what he’d learned—quite quickly, you might add—was one of your absolute sweet spots, his hips aiding in thrusting deeply within you.
Spencer’s hand snaked up your spine, tangling in your hair, his fingers wrapping around a few strands. It surprised you when he pulled on it, firm enough to pull your head to the side. You moaned at the sensation, ready for him to do anything at this point. You were so turned on, you were a moaning, whimpering mess underneath him.
“Still. Think. I’m. Vanilla?”
Each of his words were clipped, growled into your ear and enunciated with a forceful thrust.
“No,” you rasped, quickly losing control of yourself and becoming delirious from the ecstasy he was providing you with.
“I’m sorry, what was that?” he grunted, halting his movements completely.
You about sobbed in agony, wanting the feel of him back. Your hips automatically moved backwards to get some more friction, but Spencer held them still.
“Tell me,” he groaned, the slight strain in his voice indicating he was struggling with keeping still, himself.
You cursed, craving the delicious sensation of him deep within you again especially since you were on the brink of shattering like broken glass.
“Who’s not vanilla?” Spencer taunted.
He began moving once again, his motions slow and teasing. He slid in and out of you with long, lackadaisical thrusts although he made sure each move was deep enough so you could feel every inch of him within you. 
“Dammit Spencer, please,” you mewled, encircling your hips in small movements.
His low groan that came from above you was telling enough that he was trying and failing to keep his cool.
“Answer me,” he murmured huskily, his lips traveling up your back, hands reaching forward to massage your breasts in his hands.
“Answer me,” he repeated, “And I’ll fuck you like you deserved to be fucked.”
Your mouth dropped, a haggard moan escaping your throat. You weren’t used to hearing Spencer dirty talk and you’d realized that you instantly loved it.
His facial hair scratched your cheek as his mouth moved in the vicinity of it, sucking on your jaw.
“Be a good girl and answer me and I promise I’ll fuck you so hard you’ll see stars, baby girl,” his low whisper came, one hand gliding between your legs, finger ghosting your clit.
“I’ll make you cum harder than you even imagined. Until you’re dripping all over my cock. I wanna fuck my girl, good, Spencer purred.
“Oh my god,” you cried, the overstimulation of his words and his touch finally getting you to lose absolute control of your conscious mind.
“You, Spencer, you,” you moaned.
The only sounds that filled his living room were the mixed moans and the sound of your bodies moving together as he fulfilled his promise and resumed his earlier pace though more erratic this time.
Your inadvertent clenching around him with every move was making him lose control quickly. 
“Fuck, fuuuuck,” you whined, clenching the edges of the desk so hard you knew your hands would be sore later.
In the back of your mind, a small part of you registered that you most likely sounded akin to a pornstar right now, though you didn’t spend much time on the thought. The fire in your veins was igniting the growing pressure in your stomach, like a furnace growing too hot.
It took less than a few moves before you went tumbling over the cliff of ecstasy. Your eyes screwed shut, your vision going completely white behind your closed eyes as you managed out a satisfied, bliss filled cry.
It was like lightning had struck your body except the electricity had come straight from the pit of your belly. Spencer had been right, it was the most intense orgasm you’d ever experienced.
It was the body shaking, breathtaking, best kind of high ever, type of intense.
His own had soon followed as you’d tumbled down the rabbit hole of your own delirium. His hands gripped your sides and his body shuddered behind yours.
“Y/N, Y/N,” he groaned repeatedly, still moving with you, wringing every last drop of pleasure out of both of your orgasms.
His face was buried in the crook of your neck as you arched back into him, reaching behind him to grip his hair as you rode out the waves of pleasure.
It took a few moments before both of you stilled, your breathing hard, heart beating wildly. 
When your senses had somewhat turned to normal and the rushing of your blood in your ears had calmed down, you noticed your legs shaking—a definite sign of a good fucking.
You felt his breath on your neck, his breathlessness matching your own. Your body felt slick against his from all of the exertion, but it had been totally worth it. 
Spencer pushed your hair to one side of your neck, burying his face into your neck sweetly before leaving a gentle kiss there.
“My god, Spencer,” you half laughed, trying to focus the tiny bit of energy you had left on attempting to stand.
Disconnecting himself from you, he turned you to face him. He lifted you back on to the desktop to sit, not caring that your thighs were currently slick with the product of his own orgasm. Your quivering legs were thankful for the momentary reprieve though.
“I know,” he smirked, “Didn’t know I had it in me, huh?”
“Definitely not,” you smirked, lifting your face up towards his.
Your lips met his lazily. You spent a few minutes enjoying one other, mouths parting and meeting over and over, enjoying the post coital consequential kisses before getting cleaned up.
His hands splayed over the tops of your thighs, stroking gently. He may have been rough with you earlier, but you knew his gentle touch was him wordlessly assuring himself you were okay.
You were actually more than okay—you had definitely been well fucked.
“Spencer?” you mumbled against his lips.
“Hmm?”
He pulled away from you, his eyes opening, his dreamy, currently hazy, hazel eyes meeting yours. 
“Remind me to never listen to Morgan ever again.”
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3K notes · View notes
worminstuff · 4 years
Note
hey luv !! your ficus are so good and one of the few things giving me serotonin rn. if it’s not to much trouble, could you do number 20, panic attack, with sapnap because ive been struggling with those lately. tysm !
i wasn’t going to write today, because i’ve also been feeling a bit down, and it’s a bit of a busy day, but for an ask like this i cant say no.
i know you guys don’t know me personally but if you ever need anything (even if it’s an ask like this) please let me know! i won’t mind at all! i love all of you wit my whole heart!!!! i hope you feel better anon, panic attacks are hard, but it’ll all be good once it’s over! and they never last forever! and i’m glad my writing makes you a lil happy, that means so much!!!!!
sorry for all that,,,, here it is!!
Sapnap x reader
tw: panic attack
^^^^^^^^
You were sat on the floor of your bedroom, trembling and overwhelmed. You couldn’t pin point what exactly was causing this panic episode this time, but that could just be because of your panicked thoughts.
Your phone was buzzing, it seemed like it had been forever. With a trembling hand, you reached for your phone. The bright light of your lockscreen lit up your face in your dark room.
20 missed calls from nick❤️
10 missed calls from green man🐢
9 missed calls from sam🙃
15 messages from nick❤️
12 messages from green man🐢
And the list went on, texts from wilbur, from tubbo, and even tommy.
You’d been offline for about 2 or 3 days (you lost count) and everyone was getting worried. You weren’t going to look at any of the texts, as your vision was seeming to blur, until you caught a glimpse of one.
I’m coming over.
It was from Nick. The thought of someone seeing you right now sent your brain into another spiral.
What was he gonna think after he saw what a mess you’d become?
Your thoughts were interrupted quickly when you heard the jingle of keys and your front door open. You’d forgot nick had his own key.
Heavy steps moving quickly through your house brought the gentle giant to your doorway suddenly.
Looking up at him through an ocean of tears you could faintly see his face fall.
His heart broke at the sight of you, instantly he moved over to where you were, sitting behind you with his legs on either side of you. Before wrapping his arms around you he asked gently,
“Can i touch you? Or no touch?” He was quiet, not wanting you to get startled. With only a nod from you he understood and gently pulled you to his chest.
No further words where spoken as he held you through the worst of it, your heaving breath and shakes didn’t cause him to move a bit.
He waited a bit for it to slow, breathing with you, trying to steady your breath. After it was sort of steady, less of hyperventilation, he rested his head on yours.
“Can i run a bath? Or are we hungry? We can go for a ride too...or we can take a nap..or if you wanna call Nikki or Will..I know they usually help with these..” Nick wanted to give you anything and everything. If you asked him to buy tickets to florida to see clay, right now with those teary eyes and shivery hands, he would hand you his wallet instantly.
You turned, slowly, facing him now. You held his large hand in yours, looking at his hands. He lifted one Tucking a small strand of hair behind your ear.
“Did you edit the video you needed done for today?” You looked up at him finally.
He chuckled softly shaking his head. How could you possibly be thinking of that right now.
“I did but it doesn’t matter, what do you need right now bub? How bout some water to start? With some ice maybe?” He stroked your cheek softly, a small smile on his face.
You nodded a bit but when he started to get up a small whimper left your mouth.
“Cant be here and getting you water babe..I’ll be right back I promise.” He gave you a little kiss on your forehead and then got up slowly and made his way out of the room.
Once he came back he sat in front of you, putting the water down gently inbetween you both.
“After some water how about a nap? You look like you haven’t been sleeping good..” his hand gently laid on your knee, rubbing it softly.
You took a sip of the water and nodded shakily.
You both sat as you drank your water in a comfortable silence, until your phone was ringing again. Before you could look at it, Nick grabbed it, glancing at the screen.
“It’s clay. He’s really worried too, how about I answer and just let him know I’m here so he calms down” he laughed a little, and you nodded.
As he answered you could hear clay faintly,
“Oh my god! You finally answered, jesus Y/n I am so worried, so is nick. You need to call him. He’s been a total utter WREC-“
“HEY! Woah there, I’m fine actually but thanks. Y/n’s okay too, I’m with her. Just wanted you to know she’s okay.” Nick cut him off before he went further.
You sort of tuned out the rest of their convo after finishing the water. You slowly scooted a tad closer to Nick, cuddling yourself to his chest. He wrapped his free arm around you holding you tightly. Once he finished talking to Clay, he wrapped his other arm around you.
“I was so worried..next time..try, I know it’s hard but send me something, just a letter and I’ll know. I’ll be here so fast. I don’t care what I’m doing. I’m always free for you. I mean it.”
You only could respond with a nod, and he knew you understood.
^^^
everything will be ay okay, i love you an no matter what you did today I’m also proud of you. Breathing is a hard task yk.
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legendaryoikawa · 4 years
Text
make out with med student!sakusa
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warnings: slightly nsfw, profanities, grammar errors
note: requested by @henny-in-the-hamptons i hope you enjoy this, i apologize too if this took so long to be released hdhdhdhd (anyways i had to open my anatomy book and i was reviewed as well oml)
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how did u guys meet:
so here’s our tall and favorite germaphobe lmao
but you love him even though he’s aloof and comes out like he doesn’t give a fuck
well he does, he hates crowds, a highkey misanthropist but he give exception doe ;))
we know who it is,,,, u hdhdbdhdbdhdbhd <333
you guys dated because u asked him out in this college party and you just wanted to shoot your shot because apparently you are crushing for him for years yet sakusa is like a fucking rock,,,, and bold of u to assume he’ll ask u out >:P
but anywaaaays,,, ur hardwork paid off especially when he pulled his mask midway down his lips
and looked at you directly and said “okay,,”
he’s cold but WHATEVER
at least you made the king agree on going out as ur date for the college party
alexa pls please play bOom Boom BOOm BOOm I wanT U IN MY RoOM skksks
and ur heart is really beating loud especially when he lean slowly to match ur height jdhdhddb
and the way the butterflies roamed in ur stomach when he dragged out the words of “okay” to you,, 
like his voice is like husky but laced with confusion and amusement?? yes okay yes.
so let us zoooooooooom at the party
it isn’t hard to spot sakusa in the college gym because he stands out in a way you don’t expect him to be
like,,,,,,,,,,,,,, homeboy has his hands tucked in his jacket, his mf mask (stan sakusa for a cute 2020) and his curls and His MOLeS JSJBDJ
it was awkward at first especially when u tried to initiate some good topics to start with him 
But HE IS DRY SMH >:(((((((((((((((((((((
but U r moRe than willing to converse w hIm no matter how DRY HE TAKES <3 
but it was heart warming for u especially when he really tried to socialize despite him hating social gatherings in general,,,,
but this is getting long but U gOt sakusa the great to confess to after u have showed to him how persistent U r no matter how hard he wipes u off with his alcohol spray
u have germs but according to him,,,,, 
“u r my only germ <333″ 
ODJBFHJVDHJVDS <333333333333333333333333 
while making out : NSFW !!!!!!
okay so,, makeouts are rare because he IS a med student and let’s be frank he has more time with his books than u
most of his classes are overloaded and he’ll come home dead tired 
or if ur lucky he’ll kiss u then go straight up to work on his assignments
but u do understand because he told u that he cannot commit his hundred percent attention to u and u were like 
“I understand”
but there are times that you will just miss him so hard and u can’t do anything about it so u just let the night slip like the usual 
but of course sakusa is well aware of this and it makes him feel bad but he tried to think of ways to make it up to u
and an idea strikes him,,,, he has an upcoming anatomy exam
;)))))))))))))))))))))))))
he will call u out like,, “hey..”
 and of course you will be so shocked because that was the first time in weeks he paid attention to you and you were like “:O,,,, oh hey babe, what’s up?”
“come here..”
“huh whereee?”
“in.my.room quick!”
and the you yeeted yourself out just to ran all the way in his room
and u were slightly nervous yet excited because,,,, ur not gullible lmao
and then you found him removing his jacket and he’s left with just his fitted top and his varsity shorts
those short SHORTS that r the fabric of sin because god ThOSE FUCkIng THIGHs?
anyways he asked if he could use u as his basis for his anatomy test 
and you were like,,,,,,,,, yeah of course
at first it was pure and serious because he will point things like
“okay his is the clavicle” while pointing at your collarbones and the way ur body shivers after his touch is just = sexual tension
and then it escalates till you ask him what is this certain bone and he couldn’t answer u because
he’s turned on big time 
and was like “fuck this shit, let me study in my own ways” while muttering deeply to himself and proceeded to grab you by the jaw :o
and begins giving you open mouthed kiss while caressing your sides 
then he pointed out,, “this is your platysma” while kissing a part somewhere in your neck 
“do u know why my fucking mouth is attacking you with kisses? it’s because the masseter is the one moving by closing the jaw by elevating the mandible”
“turn around for me”
and you did and he began running his hands thru your back
and after every muscle he names he leaves a kiss or worst a hickey because “it’s my mark so i can remember which is which”
and then he will purposely start all over again from the top of naming your body parts till you got so irritated and pulled him in 
and <3
you can feel his hands roaming around, slightly cupping your breasts while he named it as “i love your mammary gland”
it sounded wrong but scientifically it is right lmao
“we’re still not yet in reproductive system but i can advance study...”
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sorry if this took long enough to create,, online classes just started and I tried to squeeze this in despite my heavy schedule lmao but anyways i am already close to 1k and im seriously happy and touched for all those who followed, and supported my fics even if they’re not the best among all,,, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much!
for those mutuals that i have talked to, i couldn’t reach out to you all because ive been busy with stuff lately but i love u all, always! anyways, i hope everyone will support the other works im planning to release in the future! love lots!
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noritoshiikamo · 4 years
Text
this is how you fall in love
pairing: kuroo tetsuroo + fem!oc genre: friends into lovers fluff with slight suggestive end tags//warning: nothing major // slight suggestive at the end if you squint enough note: the obligatory trio of mine: not well edited, lowercase intended, english isnt my first language im sorry if i murder it. o wow look ive been posting back to back, ive been writing nonstop lately watch me ghost my stories in few weeks guys my brain = rotting, plus lately ive been feeling emotionally abuseddrained so i need something fluffy
listen to this is how you fall in love by jeremy zucker + chelsea cutler for maximum feels
“you’re a lifesaver.”
kuroo huffed, eyes rolling back with a small laugh as he unlaced his sneakers and slipped the room slipper on. it was odd to see the gymnasium without any nets or balls sprawled around. the gym has been closed for a week now in preparation for the upcoming open school event and currently under the art club’s jurisdiction. under her jurisdiction with her canvases and paints and it pained him to see her ruining his sacred place. he carried two plastic bags and holding two boba teas in the same hand. he wasn’t sure which one she was more excited for; the boba, the paints she made him ran to an art supply shop or him. she reached out, the bobas in his hand exchanged as she settled it on the floor, and she squealed at the sight of the plastic bag. he frowned.
yup, not him.
tins of different colors of paint that she ran out mid painting that she forgot to buy had her dialing his number and now it’s all here. all thanks to kuroo tetsuro. she grimaced at the price tags; it was costly than her usual one. usually, she would’ve gotten her supplies online, but desperate measure calls for desperate solution. she could always claim her expenses with the club. typical kuroo, she huffed. he always preached about getting the best, not minding the price tags but she’ll be the victim of his nonstop complaining that he’s getting broke every single day. she tucked a stray hair back and mentally counted how much she owed the man as she arranged the tins on the table.
kuroo noticed that look; same look she had when they are in the math class and he clicked his tongue, “tch, you’re not paying.”
“i’m reimbursing you with the club money,” she shook her head and reached for her bag, “please kuroo, it’s so expensive.”
he reached for her wrist and she dropped the tote bag as he invaded her space. kuroo rested the palm of her hand right above his heart, his own around the waist and another under her chin as he tilted her chin up. his heartbeat was erratic, and she flushed. “it’s okay,” he said, softly. her lips formed into a small pout and he fought the urge to just kiss her.
their dynamic is something even kenma couldn’t figure it out.
they weren’t exactly dating. they are friends, close friends, and classmates. it has always been him, her and occasionally yaku; creating the chaotic duo/trio of class 5. they both played volleyballs, both captains while he’s the middle blocker, she’s their female team’s setter. they knew a lot of each other’s friends from other schools; he was the reason why she dated akaashi keiji from the first place. it was selfish of kuroo to admit to bokuto a month after they started dating that he disliked the idea of them together. typical kuroo is no longer snarky, he felt lost, felt like he was losing his other half. so, he confided to his close friend, the simpleton ace.
“you didn’t make any moves, kuroo, you can’t blame them.”
bokuto noted as them both stared at the two setters, playing around the fallen cherry blossoms. bokuto never seen akaashi smiled that much and kuroo could only wished that she smiled the same way to him. kuroo stared at the half bitten onigiri he’d been holding, suddenly every bite he took tasted bitter. every trace of akaashi on her gave him bitter taste. she liked wearing akaashi’s jersey; kuroo longed to see her in his own numbered jersey; she’s his number one after all. her own jersey number is as same as akaashi. it’s not like kuroo could hate anything he did; he treated her well. akaashi was a perfect boyfriend and everyone knew. that’s why kuroo hates him; he gave him no reason to hate the dude. it didn’t last long however, they drifted apart 6 months later, sending her to kuroo’s doorstep soaked in rain.
he stared at her soaked figure with no thoughts in mind.
“he dumped me,” she said, voice hoarse and shivering.
he was alone and was about to leave for kenma’s, but he couldn’t leave her alone. dropping his keys on the small table by the door, he threw his jacket back in the closet. “come in,” he whispered, pulling her figure in. dropping her bag on the floor, she clutched on his sleeves as she kicked off her soaking shoes. “i’m sorry, my mom isn’t home and i can’t find my keys,” she was a blabbering mess and he hushed her. he left her for a few minutes, coming back with a steaming towel and a clean shirt and pants. “it’s from the dryer. you can borrow my sister’s clothes,” grabbing her hands, they ran upstairs where he took her to the bathroom. she was too quiet, so he called her name. when she looked up to him, her eyes were red. she was no longer crying, more confused and upset. her cheeks flushed and he could see her teeth chattering. he wished nothing but to throw his fist at the man. finally, he got a reason to square up the stoic man; he always hates the way nothing could riled up akaashi.
“he’s stupid for doing you like this.”
she shook her head, “it’s nobody’s fault.”
“then stop blaming yourself,” he ruffled her hair, a small smile appeared from the corner of her lips as she watched him disappeared closing the door behind him. he left her with the hot water running, urgently grabbing the mop and bucket from the kitchen, and wiping the trail of her soaked feet has left before it could ruin the wooden floor.
cant come over, busy, ill tell u later
kuroo texted kenma. the pudding head left him on read.
they spend the night together, sitting on the floor with pillows pilling against the end of the bed as they sat in arms. he had his tv opened to one of the late-night game show. they sat in silence, her head rested on his shoulder and her lips pressed into a tiny line. at the corner of his eyes, he could see her phone’s notifications blaring despite being on mute. the number isn’t saved but it was familiar. she deleted his number already, probably out of rage, but it’s a good step.
tell me where you want me to drop your stuff im sorry i hope youre okay y/n? i heard it was storming did you make it back home? give me a call im calling you okay?
just as like what the message stated, the unknown number called her. it startled her which startled him too. she stared down on the screen, he noticed the grip on the phone and wondered how the phone did not break yet. “can you answer it for me?” she said, holding the phone out to the black-haired man. shocked, he took the phone and pressed the green button. he pressed the phone to his ear and heard her name being called.
“hey man,” kuroo cleared his throat, “listen-”
“she’s with you?” the voice- akaashi asked.
looking down on the girl who was pretending to not have any interest in the call at all, eyes focused on the gameshow, kuroo sighed.
“she is. listen, i think you should leave her alone.”
“kuroo, i know about your feelings. for her. bokuto-san told me about it. if you think that this is the proper way to get her when she’s vulne-”
kuroo bit the inside of his cheeks. he was offended that akaashi dared to call him out like that. “so, what? she made her pick,” the girl turned to face him, brows up wondering what they are talking about.
“that’s low, even for you, kuroo-san.”
their eyes met. he didn’t even realize how deep the cut on his palm where he had balled his fingers into a fist until she touched it. he calmed down. “you hurt her. you have no right to say what’s low or not. be a bigger man, leave her alone,” he muttered flatly, before ending the call. they didn’t break eye contact until he realized what he had done.
“i-i shouldn’t have done that.”
she shook her head, “stop blaming yourself,” a small smile on her face.
that was 3 months ago.
kuroo had made moving on easy for her. akaashi and her remained friendly, although kuroo noticed that she tended to avoid him when possible. the breakup was indeed mutual, but merely on the fact that he lost feelings. akaashi had fallen out of love with her and in love with some other girl but who was she to judge when she was falling in love with the rooster head in silence. they still hang out with bokuto and akaashi but rarely with the latter.
she made him apologized to the fukurodani’s setter too and they remained on friendly term, still practiced together whenever they have training camps together where akaashi had admitted one training night that kuroo and her looks better together. kuroo didn’t say anything, not that he knew what to reply to that (his mind scream fuck yeah we do) but shrugged at his statement. “i guess dating her made you less pain in the ass, kuroo-san,” akaashi joked as they resumed the game.
kuroo was pulled back to reality when he felt his lips brushed against something. his eyes widened when he realized what it was. a quick kiss from her. he blinked frantically, trying to comprehend what had just happened which caused the girl to laugh. “did you just?” he asked confused by what had just happened which she nodded. she bit her bottom lip to hold herself from bursting into a laugh. “god, you should see your face. it’s so stupid. and every girl called you the playboy captain huh?”
he huffed and rolled his eyes, “i am not. i’ve been loyal to one girl for many years now, she is the one who hasn’t notice me at all,” he faked his pout, refused to look her directly in the eyes, praying that she wouldn’t notice his reddening cheeks.
“she must’ve been so stupid,” she teased, her nose rubbing gently against his jawline as she rested her figure against his closer. his chin rested against her head.
“she is,” he looked down on her, his arms around her waist tighter, “i don’t think she knows this but if she leaves me, i think i’ll be so broken inside. is it selfish to say that?” a small frown appeared on her face.
“i don’t think she ever talked about leaving you.”
a grin grew on his face, “so you know who i’m talking about huh?” she fell into his trap. she rolled her eyes and stuck her tongue out, calling him stupid. he studied her face, his grin softened into what yaku and his volleyball team called the kuroo is stupidly in love with y/n but refused to admit face. his fingers ran into her hair which she had been growing out in few months down to her shoulder because she thinks that he likes her better that way. the way she tried to subtly put on make up to look better that the other girls who’s shamelessly flirting with him. she was too stupid to realize that he had loved her beyond that.
he loves the rough pads on her hands from holding her paintbrushes and volleyball. he loves that she works hard for everything she’s doing be it studying, volleyball or arts, she would put her blood, sweat and tears into it. he loves that she would wait for him to buy lunch so they can eat together in class. he would buy her a box of milk which she insisted that she doesn’t need too; but he convinced it would be good for her. he wants the best for her.
he loves that all the missing clothes he’s complaining about is in the back of her closet or on her. his cream hoodie hanging behind her closet door, his random pile of t-shirts in a basket on the floor of her closet that he liked to left beside the mix pile of her shoes and his one big ass nike shoes. her room isn’t messy, it is because she kept the messiness in her closet. she also like to keep random stuff of him too. the one medal he won from a science fair hung on the headboard of her bed, the misshapen looking hand wax sculpture of their hands intertwined from a funfair where she rested a purikura of them on it and a lucky bamboo plant he gave on her birthday to compromise on the no gift rule.
“for luck,” he grinned.
unlike hers, he kept her item neatly in his drawer. your spare shirts that he borrowed and refused to return, extra towel and her toiletries, some of her drawing blocks and a small cat shaped pouch where she kept her allergies medication. mostly hidden because his annoying friends come over often and would accidentally talk about it in front of his grandparents. but, on his bedside table, he has a cup of pencils by the bed where he collected the art supplies she left behind, random markers and paintbrushes, a clay sculpture of a trinket plate she made from art club (she carved a tiny letter k in the corner beside the obvious looking genitalia drawing) and a fake plant which she was sure he will not be able to kill it.
he loves it when she wore his jersey. he lost his mind when he found out that her current season number is the same as his. he’s in love. the first time he saw her in his jersey, the number one jersey on her body was during their training. he lost concentration; mouth hung a bit. he got so flustered that he let lev served the ball straight to his head. usually, lev would be dead by now, but he doesn’t mind. his nose bled but to see her kneel beside him, clutching on his own shirt screaming how stupid he is, wiping the blood away with towel, he could only say how pretty she looked. all his teammates were startled, her included. she clutched on his collar angrily; her knees stung from when she leaped down to his side, but this idiot could only smile at her with a bloody nose. “you are fucking idiot,” she cried out angrily, pushing him away before throwing the towel on his face leaving the pleased third year laying on the floor.
he loves the way she would find a way to impress him, be it as ridiculous as the halloween costume idea she had where they’ll go as the front and end of a horse or as serious as the submitted college application to the same university he had gotten into. “you are not getting rid of me that easily, tetsu,” the evil look on her face as she clicked the submit button send shivers down his spine.
“if you leave, i think i’ll cry,” he confessed, his smile slowly died.
“kuroo tetsuro is going to cry after me?” she teased. he nodded eagerly. “does kuroo tetsuro realized that we are literally moving into the same university? i couldn’t catch a break from him,” she faked her annoyance which he playfully avenged by sending her on the floor laughing as he tickled her. tears trickled down her cheeks as she begged him to stop, screaming to get away from his grip. “please, kuroo, i’m going to pee if you don’t stop!” he obliged, tears prickled the corner of his own eyes from laughing too much. straddling her waist, he gathered her wrists in one hand over her head. “apologize and said that kuroo tetsuro is the best man in your life or i swear i’ll make you pee,” he threatened her playfully, wiggling the fingers of his free hand close to her waist. her eyes widened in fears.
“that’s not fair!”
“apologize first.”
“fine!” she pouted, “i’m sorry, i won’t make fun of you again. now get off me!”
he raised his eyebrow, “andddd?”
“annddd-” a teasing smile appeared on her face as she said the next 5 words that send him to mars and back; “i love you kuroo tetsuro.”
he froze in shock. he heard the words before but never in this way; never for him.
finally, i think i got the calculation, love you yaku! lev you’re adorable but so stupid, i love it! thank you for letting me borrow your game, kenma. you’re the best, love ya!
the grip on her wrists loosened. taking advantage of his shock state, she pushed him back, straddling him by the waist, pinning his own hands above his head, giving him the taste of his own medicine. “i’m not going to leave your sorry ass, tetsu. i hope you don’t regret it,” she leaned down, capturing his lips with a longer kiss. letting go of his wrist, her hand went immediately into his rooster hair while another cupped his cheek, deepening their kiss. she could feel his cold palm resting against her bare waist and she shuddered. between the kisses, he heard her whispering his name. “kuroo, do you love me too?” she asked so innocently with kisses between the words but the way she grabbed a handful of his hand in a fist felt so dirty, eliciting a strangled moan from the back of his throat. she pulled back, staring down on his eyes as his lips moved.
“i love you too.”
nothing in his hazel eye but sincerity. he groaned when she pulled herself out of his reach, missing her warm body as she laughed. straightening her sweater back, pulling her hair back up into a tighter ponytail before she picked up the paintbrush she dropped. the paintbrush left a white stain on the court. as if kuroo wasn’t here, whimpering underneath her a minute ago, she continued her work. “i need to finish the mural by this week and you’re not exactly helping me,” she warned him, pointing the wet brush his direction. through the corner of her eyes, he was propped on his elbows, still staring at her, causing her to blush profusely. it annoyed him that she would tease him, then leaving him high and dry. before she could crack open the new paint tin, he ignored her warning as he tackled her back into his arms.
breathless against her lips, he told her to continue later. the urgency and rawness of his voice made her putty immediately. looking up the man, she pouted her lips.
“kuroo-san,” she whined as he captured her bottom lips.
he elicited a soft moan from the girl. he grinned against her lips. a hand rested firmly beside her head while another snaked under the sweater. there will be bruise tomorrow, she was sure of it, he will make sure of it.
“it will be quick, baby. i promise.”
she has no objection.
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writingsfromhome · 4 years
Text
Nuclear Family II
Part 2: Miscommunications
A/N: part 2!! I was so overwhelmed w how much you guys enjoyed the first part, kind of made my head go blank lol. But now I rewrote it and added more ~spice. Sorry it took so long but I so appreciate all of you engaging w it! 💖
Part I / Part II / Part III / Part IV / Part V
-----------------------------
Sleeping in was not something that existed when you had a child and Harry learns that the hard way. By half past 7, I’m already up because of the poking on my cheeks and when I come out from brushing my teeth, I hear shouts from upstairs.
“Charlotte!” I shout up but I'm ignored. I climb the stairs and locate the door to the small voice. “Charlotte let your dad sleep!” I open the door to Charlie jumping on Harry's bed and Harry rubbing his eyes. His eyes go to mine when the door opens and he lets out a chuckle.
“Parenthood,” I sigh and try to grab Charlie from the bed. She moans to come back and wiggles her way out to run back to the bed. Harry's sitting up at this point and I blush realising he didn’t have on a shirt. I had to stop acting 12.
“I want to play!” Charlie shouts, still jumping.
“Alright you crazy monkey!” Harry grabs our daughter and whispers something to her before attacking her in tickles. She shouts for me to help but when I try to help Harry pulls me into the covers and Charlie climbs atop me to tickle me instead.
“You two sneaks!” I shout between fits of laughter but Charlie soon tires and lays beside me, her head resting on my chest. Harry lies down on the other side of her, propped up on his elbow.
“I’m just going to…” Harry grabs his phone from his bedside table and holds it above us. Charlie already loved posing for cameras, so she grins but I cover my face. “Y/N come on! One photo!”
“Fine but I get to take it,” I bargain. Harry agrees and hands me the phone, shoving in closer so our heads almost touch. I ignore the closeness and stretch the phone above us, getting my good side, and just before I click it I shout “please!” a phrase Charlie used to say when she was younger instead of cheese. It gets a giggle out of her and in the photo her eyes are squinted and her grin is pure joy. Harry is glancing at me with a faint smile on his face while my expression is stretched out in 'please.’
Suddenly the cute family photo disappears as the phone vibrates and a picture of a woman smiling on a boat appears. Harry's girlfriend. My smile curdles as I awkwardly hand over the phone to Harry. It was an abrupt reminder of what Harry and I weren’t, despite the illusion of the photo.
"Let's give your dad some privacy," I pick up Charlotte despite her protests and bring her outside.
"Who's on the phone?" She asks as I seat her on the kitchen counter. I glance at her concerned face and remember that kids were a lot more intuitive than we gave them credit for.
"His friend," I answer as truthfully as I could without breaking her heart. The weeks following our trip Charlie talked so often about having both her mom and dad together-like we were getting together forever. Even though I broke it to her gently, she still carried that flame--I didn't want to extinguish those hopes so early on.
"Is she your friend too?" Charlie asks innocently.
"Just your dad's." I kiss her forehead and then get breakfast started, so by the time Harry comes down it's almost done.
"Shit," Harry says and then glances at our daughter who's too busy with Oreo to notice his language. "I was meant to make you two breakfast your first morning here!"
"It's alright," I shrug, unable to make eye contact. "Just grab a plate."
"I feel awful," Harry joins me in the kitchen. "Have you made coffee yet?"
"No," I glance at the machine.
"I'll do that then."
"Three sugars-"
"And a drop of milk," Harry finishes. "I remember."
"Right," I flush. How odd that we keep tiny details of one another, however useless, for years after we split.
"So I sort of forgot but-"
"Mom!" Charlie interrupts Harry and I tell her it would be a minute.
"Right, well when I was talking just now w-"
"Mom! I'm starving!"
"Charlotte! Give me a minute!" I say sternly before putting the last of her strawberries on the plate. I set Charlie's breakfast up and Harry joins with our coffees. Before we even sit, Charlie begins her monologue about coffee and how she was going to drink it when she's old enough.
"That won't be for a while," I comment, glancing up at Harry who was still standing by his chair.
"I'll drink it when I'm five," she holds up her fingers and counts them down. "Then I can drink it."
Harry and I share a brief glance, him opening his mouth to say something before the doorbell rings.
"Oh sh-uh-I'll get that," Harry rushes to get the door. Charlie spills her juice in the process so I pick up the sippy cup and grab paper towels to mop the spill.
"They're right through here," Harry's voice carries over and he enters again with his...friend.
"Hi," she has a pleasant smile and hips that had obviously never carried a child. My own had never quite recovered.
"Hi," I hold up the dirty towels and quickly lower them, painfully aware of how terrible I looked. I couldn't help but compare myself to Harry's girlfriend-especially when she looked like that.
"You're daddy's friend," Charlotte says matter-of-factly.
"I am!" Her voice raises an octave as she walks towards my daughter. "I'm Miranda it's nice to finally meet you!"
Charlie looks up at me and then back to her. "Why aren't you mommy's friend?"
An awkward silence follows and I can't help but glance at Harry. He rubs the back of his neck before stepping forward towards Charlie.
"I've only just met your mommy," Miranda glances up at me with another smile but this time it's stretched too tight. "But we can all be friends! It's nice to meet you."
Charlie looks at me and I smile at her in encouragement. "Okay," she concedes before going back to her piece of toast.
"Have you had breakfast?" Harry asks her quietly.
"I had a coffee," she answers. "But we'll be late if we don't leave now."
"Have you got somewhere to be?" I ask, unaware as Harry hadn't mentioned it yesterday.
"A friend of mine has a wedding thing," she keeps glancing at Harry even though she talks to me.
"I forgot about it," Harry says. "Miranda reminded me this morning I meant to tell you but the pancake monster kept shouting for her pancakes!"
Charlie giggles and tears into another one.
"We've got to be there half past ten," Miranda says quietly to Harry.
"I'm not even ready!" Harry looks down. "I need to shower too. Give me a half hour."
"This is why I had to come early," she shakes her head at me as if we shared an inside joke. I smile knowing how fake it felt. Harry gives me a pleading look as if to say he was sorry before heading upstairs but I shake my head and go to the kitchen to wash the sticky juice off my hands. I hear Miranda talking to Charlie and stay longer than I needed to in the kitchen before heading out again.
"It was really nice to finally meet you," Miranda tells me after Harry finishes up and they get going. She bends down to high-five Charlotte. "And you too!"
"I'll see you around 5," Harry tells me. "I've left keys so you can just come and go whenever."
"I thought we were going to have lunch together," Charlie pouts, suddenly realizing what this all meant.
"I know love," Harry picks her up. "I forgot about this party I had to go to."
"You never forgot at home," Charlie's bottom lip quivers.
"Dad will be home soon," I take Charlie from Harry before the waterworks could start. "And we're gonna have so much fun together right?"
"It's bullshit!" Charlie shouts. My cheeks colour and Harry's jaw drops before he bites back a laugh.
"Charlotte!" I scold but she runs away from my arms. I meet Miranda's eyes and they're wide as saucers.
"I don't know where she...picked up on that." I say lamely. I never swore in front of her-well rarely did. She must have been listening yesterday. Harry tries to say something about it but I cut him off. "Just go. I'll deal with her."
He hesitates but leaves with Miranda who looks relieved to go. I feel bad for Charlotte, knowing how excited she was to spending her whole first day with Harry and I find myself annoyed at him too for forgetting the event and ruining the plans.
I find our daughter curled up in bed and before I could give her a warning about swearing she's wrapped her arms around my neck and shoves her snotty face in my shoulder, apologizing for saying the bad word.
"As long as I don't hear it again," I say without much conviction. I was too upset with Harry to be upset with her too.
I put Charlotte in front of the TV as I clean up breakfast and try to work through my feelings. I couldn't tell if I was more upset about Harry bailing on us or seeing him with his girlfriend; anyone with eyesight could see they had good chemistry and it bothered me. But I came here knowing he was dating somebody else and knowing nothing would happen between us. But then last night, Harry was more affectionate than he needed to be. Maybe he was working through old emotions too, I figure. Maybe I didn't need to read into every single thing.
I decide that Charlie and I wouldn't feel sorry for ourselves and dress us up to step out. I pay a visit to an old friend and we all go out to lunch-Charlie being kept company by my friend's five year old. As we head out I check my phone to see nine missed calls from Harry and a few texts asking where I was-it was already 6 and I hadn't even noticed.
I text Harry simply saying we were on our way home and listen to Charlie talk about her new friend the whole tube ride home. But once we reach Harry's flat, my mood sours. For starters, his girlfriend is still over and Harry is really upset I hadn't picked up.
"Where've you been?" Harry asks calmly but his annoyance betrays his true feelings.
"Hey," I let Charlotte down. "We were just having a late lunch with y/f/n and time got away from us."
"I've been calling and texting-you didn't hear?" Harry, surprisingly, is still trying to remain calm.
"My phone was away," I laugh off the tension noting that Miranda sat awkwardly at the dining table. "We had the keys so-"
"I was worried," Harry glances at Charlie who was preoccupied.
"You told us we could spend the day out--that's why you gave the keys," I say a little aggressively.
"I wanted-I thought we could go out before dinner since I couldn't spend the morning with Charlotte." Charlie looks up at the sound of her full name.
"I had lots of fun with my new friend," Charlie states and I could tell she was still angry at Harry with the stubborn set of her chin. She'd gotten that from me.
"Just mixed signals," I interrupt. "It's not a big deal-we just need to communicate our plans better, okay?"
"I booked us tickets for a movie," Harry's continues, his voice is definitely bordering on aggressive and I wonder why he was so upset and making such a show while his girlfriend was still here. "And dinner reservations and now that's gone to waste! Keep your phone on you if-"
"No," I say assertively to stop Harry as his voice rises. "I understand I'm living at your place because I had no choice, but you don't get to speak to me like that. We're Charlotte's parents but we're nothing to each other. Next time, don't forget your own plans and communicate to me clearly if you want to go out with all three of us. Now excuse me."
I pick my bag up again and head to the room, my eyes burning and my heart racing. I hear Charlie's little footsteps behind me and I feel guilty that it hadn't even been a day and she had to witness us arguing. Why was parenting so hard?
I stay in the room and don't come out even as Charlie heads back out again when Harry calls us for dinner or when I hear Miranda leave or a movie being put on. I stay on my laptop, working, and ignoring the slight hunger at the back of my mind.
A sharp knock on the door catches my attention. The door opens slightly and Harry stands looking the complete opposite from the afternoon.
"Hi," he lets himself in and leans against the wall. "I wanted to say sorry. I didn't mean to get that upset with you I was more frustrated with myself for forgetting the party in the morning and ruining Charlie's first day here. And I was upset that she was upset with me so I planned something fun with her to make up for it and it fell through too."
I stay silent for a moment, after Harry finishes. I was still upset with him. And that wasn't a good excuse to chew me out in front of his girlfriend.
"I understand that," I shrug. "But I don't appreciate the way you just came at me with all those accusations. Especially in front of our daughter and while your girlfriend was there."
"Miranda's fine," Harry says. "She wouldn't have minded-"
"I minded!" I exclaim. "Oh my god Harry I've only just met her! This isn't my house or my city and to have a stranger sit through an argument with my baby daddy is not very fun."
"Right," Harry gets it. "Sorry. I just...keep feeling like I'm fucking up everything. I wanted Charlie here and to be with her as much as I could and now I have an angry three year old. She only just started talking to me because I gave her extra dessert."
I freeze, "Harry if you gave her extra dessert you're dealing with the consequences."
"What do you mean?" Harry perches on the bed.
"She's going to stay up and be super hyper and I'm not dealing with that."
"Ugh," Harry falls back onto the bed. "This is why I need you. You can't be angry at me, I'm such an amateur at this parenting thing and you're the wise one with all the knowledge like don't give your kid a second helping of dessert."
Harry rubs his eyes from where he lays, his shirt riding up to expose his stomach. I glance away, old feelings stirring up.
"Is there still dinner?" I change the subject.
"Of course," Harry shoots up. "I'll warm some up for you."
As I eat, I'm entertained first by the children's movie and then by Harry dealing with a hyperactive Charlie. She begins hopping around and jumping from couch to couch, tackling Harry and then coming my way. I pick her up and blow raspberries on her belly as she laughs.
"Tire her out quickly," I advise Harry as I go to clean up. "She'll fall asleep faster."
As I settle into bed, my heart twinges hearing the voices outside my room. It sounded like a family, like a family that could be mine. And the thought keeps me up even after the voices die down and Harry carries a sleeping Charlie into the room.
I keep my eyes closed and feel him tuck her in beside me. I sense him standing above the bed, the smell of him grows stronger as he leans over and kisses Charlie goodnight. I feel him hesitate before he presses his lips to my temple. I relive that single moment as he closes the door behind him and Charlie snuggles into me. And I start to realise that staying with Harry was one of my worst ideas yet.
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sparring-hyena · 4 years
Text
the time of our lives.
this one was kinda requested/suggested by @cloakanddaggerthings. they’ve also been a great help in hammering out the finicky details. thanks heaps, mate! 
OR, the one where it takes a year for these two goofs to realise they’re in love.
-
i. New Year’s Eve.
naturally, this is where they start. although, start in a very loose sense of the word. because they were something before tonight. something fiery and intense, but certainly not something real.
they were midnight rendezvouses, sharp remarks that lacked any real malice, and moments that somehow meant nothing and everything. but what they were is irrelevant. because Poppy’s got a reputation and parental expectations, and AJ doesn’t fit into any of that.
so, they stand in the front yard of some frat house, a New Year’s party raging on inside, and fight. they shout and cuss and say things that don’t at all mean but that make this whole thing easier.
it’s with ten seconds of the year left that Poppy says, “i hate you,” and feels something break in her heart.
“i hate you, too,” AJ says as the countdown finally reaches zero.
there’s cheering from inside and then AJ leaves and now Poppy’s standing alone on the front lawn. she ignores the tears that fall down her cheeks and tries to tell herself that everything will be fine.
so, yes, that’s how they start: in the final ten seconds of the year with an i hate you that actually means something else entirely.
ii. Valentine’s Day.
she sees AJ sporadically throughout the day. and that irritates Poppy like nothing else ever has. figures it would be today of all days that she sees her everywhere.
first it’s at the crack of dawn as she walks home after a one night stand that she spots AJ on a jog. they’re on opposite sides of the street, but it’s empty so they see each other.
AJ stops in her tracks and looks right at Poppy, not exactly irritated but certainly not pleased. Poppy fixes her with a glare that says what are you looking at? AJ shrugs and starts up on her jog again, and Poppy huffs and continues on her walk home.
then they see each other on campus way too many times—in the café, on the quad, and in the library. and each time, Poppy’s glare is met with a shrug from AJ.
the last time she sees AJ it’s late. the sun has long since set and there’s a chill that’s set in for the night. she’s on her way home from dinner—some blind date Veronica had set up—when she spots AJ across the street, laughing and walking hand-in-hand with some girl who looks vaguely familiar.
Poppy watches them until she can’t see them anymore, and wonders if AJ saw her this time, too.
iii. spring break.
she goes to Miami for the week with Veronica and Chloe. her intention is to have a fun and carefree week where she doesn’t once think about AJ.
it’s two days into her trip when she finds herself scrolling through Instagram late one night. curiosity nibbles at her restraint until she’s typing AJ’s name into the search bar.
she finds AJ’s profile and the first picture she sees is some candid shot of AJ and that same girl from Valentine’s Day looking at each other with ridiculously cheesy smiles. Poppy switches her phone off and doesn’t dare touch it for the rest of the night.
Poppy goes to a party the next night and hooks up with a girl who looks a lot like AJ. Veronica and Chloe point this out a few days later, laughing over cocktails. Poppy scoffs and tells them that’s complete bullshit and tries to hide her blush by taking a long sip of her drink.
iv. summer break.
the academic year ends and Poppy sighs with relief as she collapses onto her bed. she’s got three months until her final year starts, and three months where she doesn’t have to see or think of AJ.
it goes well at first—the not thinking about AJ. she spends a lot of time shopping and partying and lounging by the pool of her parents’ beach house on Long Island. but there are only so many hours of the day where she can keep her mind busy. so it’s at night, when she’s in bed trying to fall asleep, that her mind wanders back to AJ.
the first time it happens, she groans and rolls onto her side, and tries to flush all thoughts of AJ from her mind. that works. but then it happens again and again, and before Poppy really knows it, it’s halfway through August and she’s thought of AJ every single night since the end of June.
she lays awake in bed and watches the fan on the ceiling spin in lazy circles. her brain summons a long and near forgotten memory of a night a lot like this. she closes her eyes and sinks into the warm embrace of the memory:
she was in bed with AJ. it was either late or early, Poppy can’t quite remember. she decides it probably doesn’t really matter. they were talking and laughing under the quiet blanket of night. and Poppy suddenly remembers how she’d reached for AJ’s hand and never wanted to let it go.
Poppy opens her eyes and glances to her side. the bed is empty beside her, the sheets untouched, and she can almost feel the ghost of AJ’s touch on her hand. she squeezes her eyes shut, trying not to cry, and realises she never did hate AJ. she was probably just scared.
v. Halloween.
there’s a party on campus—isn’t there always? a frat party with costumes and decorations and cheesy music that starts to sound alright after three or four drinks. Poppy slips in later in the night, when everyone’s teetering on the edge of tipsy and drunk.
she moves through the throng of people towards the kitchen to pour herself a drink, and bumps into AJ for the first time this semester.
“hey,” AJ says, awkward and unsure, and Poppy silently regrets everything she’s put her through.
“hi,” Poppy says, smiling and really meaning it.
that seems to loosen AJ up a bit, and she returns the smile in kind.
“haven’t seen you in a while,” AJ says, leaning back against the counter and sipping her drink.
“been busy,” she lies even though that’s something she’s trying to stop.
and AJ seems to understand the lie for what it is. “you wanna go outside for a bit?”
Poppy only nods, afraid that if she speaks, she’ll ruin whatever’s happening right now. it’s quieter outside, the cheesy music and chatter nothing but a gentle murmur. they stand out on the front lawn of some frat house and Poppy gets a strange sense of déjà vu.
“i wish things had been different, y’know?” AJ says, her voice a gentle reassurance.
“me too,” Poppy says, and then: “i’m sorry that i said i hate you. because i don’t.”
a moment of silence passes, uncomfortable and almost tight like a rubber band pulled to its limit. because it looks like AJ’s about to say something important that’ll put them on a better path. but then the front door of the frat house flies open, and a few drunk students stumble out into the yard.
AJ offers Poppy a smile, almost sad and longing. “it was nice seeing you again.” and then she heads back inside.
vi. Thanksgiving.
Poppy doesn’t plan on visiting her parents this year. and besides, they’re going out of town for the holiday. so if she has to be alone, she’d rather it be in the sorority house than in some stuffy brownstone on the Upper West Side.
it’s late in the afternoon when Poppy gets a text from AJ. all it says is are you at the sorority? she stares at it for a moment, debates deleting it and carrying on with her day. but something tells her to respond, so she does.
she says that she is and waits for AJ’s response. she waits five minutes, then ten and nothing comes. Poppy scoffs and tosses her phone onto her bed. it’s not long later when she hears a knock on the front door. Poppy doesn’t think much of it, so she answers it without checking.
she finds AJ standing on the front stoop, grinning like she knows something Poppy doesn’t.
“what are you doing here?” Poppy says. “i thought you’d be on your way home by now.”
“i’m getting an early flight tomorrow.” then AJ holds up a plane ticket, grinning like this has been her plan all along. “and i was wondering if you’d want to come with me.”
“what?”
“come home with me. my parents always cook too much food, so really, you’d be doing them a favour.”
Poppy folds her arms over her chest and studies AJ for a moment. “don’t you want to take your girlfriend,” she says, and maybe she wants her words to hurt a little bit.
“we broke up over the summer,” AJ says, simple and easy.
“oh. sorry.”
“don’t be. it wasn’t working out and hadn’t been for a while.”
“are you trying to use pity to get me to come with you?” Poppy says, and she knows AJ wouldn’t, but it’s kinda fun to mess with her.
“no, of course not! i just wanted to be upfront with you. so, come home with me. please.”
Poppy plucks the ticket from AJ’s hand and says, “i’m only doing this for your parents.”
“of course.” AJ winks and grins. “i’ll see you bright and early at the airport tomorrow then.
the flight is uneventful, although Poppy decides AJ is much too cheerful for seven o’clock in the morning.
when they step inside AJ’s childhood home, Poppy’s immediately struck by just how warm and lived in it all feels. AJ’s mother tells her to mind the mess as she ushers them both inside, and AJ’s father greets them and says hugs’ll have to wait as he gestures to his dirty apron.
they all cram around a too small table in mismatched chairs that creak and rock back-and-forth. Poppy doesn’t care that she’s sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with AJ and one of her sisters. dinner is loud and fun, and AJ’s parents insist on sharing stories from AJ’s childhood. and as dinner winds down and dessert is served, Poppy reaches for AJ’s hand beneath the table and knows that she’ll never let go.
vii. Christmas.
it’s close to midnight on Christmas Eve when AJ appears on the front stoop of the Zeta house. she looks distraught and like she hasn’t had a good night sleep in days. so Poppy steps outside and asks, “what’s wrong?”
AJ looks at her, really looks at her, and Poppy feels something shift in that moment. and then AJ’s talking, words tumbling from her mouth, and it doesn’t look like she can stop herself. then she says i love you and everything goes still.
it takes a moment, but AJ seems to catch up to what she’s just said. her eyes go wide, and Poppy can see that she’s gearing up to apologies. but Poppy doesn’t let her. she surges forward and hug AJ tightly because oh god, i’ve missed her so much.
Poppy doesn’t say the words back, not yet anyway. but she holds onto AJ and tries to show her that she loves her, too.
viii. New Year’s Eve.
naturally, this is where they end. although end in a very loose sense of the word. because they will be something after tonight. something supportive and challenging, but most importantly something real.
they will be promises of forever, witty remarks that are just an i love you in disguise, and moments where the rest of the word falls away and it’s just the two of them together. what they will be terrifies Poppy. because she’s got a reputation and parental expectations, and AJ doesn’t fit into any of that... right?
maybe. but maybe it’s good that AJ doesn’t fit into that. maybe it’s good that AJ had upended everything she thought she knew. maybe that’s what makes what they will be so damn perfect.
so, they stand in the front yard of some frat house, a New Year’s party raging on inside, and finally admit what’s been there all along. they talk and tease and say things they mean with all their heart.
it’s with ten seconds of the year left that Poppy says, “i love you,” and feels that final piece of her heart heal.
“i love you, too,” AJ says as the countdown finally reaches zero.
there’s cheering from inside and then AJ steps closer to Poppy, smiling so bright and warm, and Poppy twists her arms around AJ’s neck and doesn’t once care that she’s probably smiling like an idiot in love.
so, yes, that’s how they end: in the final ten second of the year with an i love you that means exactly what it claims.
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callmeelle22 · 3 years
Text
Blue Dream VII
Pairing: Iris West x Barry Alen
Rating: E
Chapter Word Count: 9, 034
Summary: A series of sporadic dates between Iris and Barry turn into something more, a story in its own making.
Chapter I: Primetime
Chapter II: It's Cool
Chapter III: Anything
Chapter IV: Comfortable
Chapter V: The Way
Chapter VI: Say Yes
Chapter VII: Brave; They fuck with the rain like a soundtrack behind them, like a song that swells and stretches, telling their story, but you're so brave; stone cold crazy for loving me; yeah, I'm amazed; i hope you make it out alive, a song that rises and rises, that sounds too good to be real, that might destroy you, but only in the best way. (Read below or on AO3 linked on the chapter title.)
Chapter VIII: Blue Dream
Brave
Broken hearts are made for two
One for me and one for you
Tell me have you heard the news
We are now in love
Fall break from school is scheduled during the last three days of the last week of October. Before she can take some time off, Iris has midterm articles to write and grade. Barry is busy testing DNA samples or whatever it is CSIs do so they don’t see each other for several days after he leaves her house the morning after Wally’s party.
On the Wednesday of Fall Break, the first day off, Iris lets herself sleep in until almost 10, and then she packs up her bag, stuffing a notebook, a couple of pens, and her laptop in, before dressing comfortably in a pair of dark leggings, and a white oversized CCU hoodie she stole from her brother. Throwing on a pair of white low-top Chuck Taylors, Iris heads out to Jitters. It’s a rainy day, and other than workers who’ve no choice, not many people are out. A storm is brewing for later in the night, the sky dark and cloudy, but for the moment, it’s just a steady rain that has Iris walking carefully to her car and driving a lot slower, thanking her lucky stars that she finds a parking spot right in front of the coffee shop.
Back in high school, especially once her dad had gotten her a used car during the beginning of senior year, Iris and Linda would come to Jitters to do homework or stare at the college boys who would come in. The coffee shop has expanded since then, buying the small antique store that had been next door and adding more seating and a bar that specializes in alcoholic coffee brews. It’s still one of Iris’s favorite places to work because now the manager is a young Black woman with wild curly hair always dyed in one bright color or another and a soft spot for mid to late 90s R & B female singers. The shop is comfortable, with couches and overstuffed chairs in mismatched browns and beiges and blues set up near the walls and windows and several tables, two- and four-tops, taking up the space in the middle. Two of the walls are exposed brick and the others are painted stark white and feature framed prints in wild colors. It’s changed since she was a child, but Iris likes to think that she’s changed with it, that as this integral part of Central City has grown and added light and color and comfort, so too has Iris.
Today, her plan is to outline at least two entire stories from interviews she’s completed over the last couple of weeks before she even thinks about leaving the coffee shop. She settles into one of her favorite spots, a soft navy armchair behind a small circular table. She sets up her laptop, her notebook with her notes, her pens, and once a waiter drops off her brown sugar latte and a chocolate muffin, she lets the sound of the rain, and the Erykah Badu playing on the speakers, get her into her work.
“Hey, beautiful.”
Iris looks up just as Barry stops beside her. She’s been at Jitters for just over three hours now, and her shoulders are cramped and she’s coffee high and hungry. The rain is still pounding down, so hard that it looks like it’s raining sideways, and Iris curses her inability to get any work done in her own home. Besides all that, she’s reeling. She’s just outlined a story of a man explaining the story of the woman he’d loved his entire life: from growing up together in a small city in North Carolina, to becoming best friends and de facto siblings when his parents died and her dad agreed to foster him; from not dating but seeming like it in high school, to falling for other people in college; from having other spouses and children to one night of passion before they found their way back to each other when she decided to leave her husband after his wife died. It was a ride from start to finish, such a roller coaster of feelings—of love and pain and joy and heartbreak—that make Iris feel a bit heavy with them, a little loopy with them.
Barry stands to the side of her, towering above her, in as simple an outfit as what she’s wearing, a pair of black joggers and a white sweatshirt. She’s startled that he's there because she figures that he should be at work, but her heart does tick up at the sight of him. That is, until she lets her eyes rake over his lean frame. He looks a little...down, like a physical manifestation of the story she’s just outlined. His hair is messier than usual and his eyes aren’t carrying their usual sparkle, in addition to the darkening bags that frame them. He’s also a little stubbly, his jaw covered in a fine layer of coarse hair, his pallor a bit ashen.
(Iris will also admit that she thinks he looks sort of, well, good, like this; but that’s neither here nor there and she feels terrible—and maybe a bit perverted—that she’s lusting after him when he’s obviously going through something.)
“Hey,” she responds softly, and she stands up to assess him further. He seems so much taller than her like this, when they’re both in sneakers. She hasn’t seen him since the morning after Wally’s party a week ago when he dropped her back off at her car after spending the night at her place. They’ve talked a bunch and FaceTimed once, but she’s missed him. She reaches up into his hair, rubbing at his scalp a little until his eyes close and he lets out a soft little moan. She keeps at it and then touches gingerly at his face, at some of the moles dotting his cheeks, at the stubble he’s grown. He reaches up to stop her, eyes still closed, and it startles her a little bit. She goes to pull her hand back, but then he holds on to her wrist to bring her hand down and presses a kiss to her knuckles.
She’s never seen him like this. He’s always so open and, maybe not happy, but never so melancholy. There is always a pep to his step, as her grandma used to say, a smile on his face that always said that he feels some sort of contentment in his life. And obviously, people are allowed to have days like this. But it does something to Iris, to see him this way. She wants to lash out at whoever has made him look like this, like he’s drowning in emotions that he can’t easily pull himself out of.
“Bear, you okay?”
He nods, a little woefully, and he catches her eyes again. She bites at her lip as she stares back at him and, on impulse, she leans up to kiss him. It’s just a little more than a peck, something to tell him that she’s there with him; but he takes it a step further, kissing her harder, biting at her lip enough that there’s more pain than she’s expecting. She moans at him and he pulls back, breathing labored.
“I’m sorry,” he speaks. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“It’s fine,” she says. “You didn’t hurt me. Well, a little, but I didn’t hate it.”
That gets a more real smile out of him, and he thumbs at her bottom lip. “Hmm, I guess my good girl is a little bad.”
Iris rolls her eyes and gives him a look, sobering for a minute. “Bear, what’s up? You okay?”
He doesn’t answer her question. Instead, he nods at her table and asks, “you get a lot of work done?”
She eyes him, wanting to ask again. But she knows how she is when she doesn’t want to talk about something and so she lets it go. For the moment.
“Yeah. Or, at least, I’ve done most of what I set out to do.”
He nods, casts his eyes out of the glass, looking at the rain for a moment, watching it fall in heavy sheets. Normally, Iris likes the rain. It’s soothing and she enjoys how it makes the world take a moment to slow down. When she was a little girl, her grandma (her dad’s mother who grew up somewhere at the bottom of Georgia) used to say that when it was raining, and particularly when it was storming, that the Lord was doing His work and that it was the time to be still. They’d have to sit quietly, usually with the TV and the lights off, and just be. And while life doesn’t allow her to drop everything because it’s started raining, there is always a hushed feeling that comes over her when it rains, something tranquil, but also a little turbulent, a little uncontrollable, quite like the very rain she’s reveling in.
“Wanna come over?” he wonders, voice unsure.
She nods readily. “Okay, yeah. Sure.”
He goes to return her mug and plate while she packs her bag back up. He meets her at the door, opening up a large umbrella and throwing an arm over her shoulder to lead her out into the rain. She walks with him past her own car as he takes her a short black away to where his Jeep is parked. He helps her into the Jeep first, watches as she tucks her bag under the seat, and then closes the door before walking around to the other side.
They ride to his house in silence. He lives far on the south side of town, a good twenty or so minutes from downtown if they hit the highway. Instead, he takes the streets, adding another ten minutes to their drive. Iris doesn’t mind; as she said, she likes the rain, and in this big Jeep, tires sluicing easily through the flooding roads in a way her car definitely can’t, she’s enjoying the ride. He had silently connected her phone to his car’s Bluetooth, so she took it to mean that the music choices were hers. She contemplates finding something that he might like, but she figures he likely wouldn’t even be paying much attention. So she decides on one of her slower playlists, ones with songs that dip and fade, that take listeners on a journey of highs and lows, and she lets it play. The lyrics tell too much, so i guess that i should mention; that i am in no condition; to put you in this position; i might fuck this up, although with the heavy weight on Barry’s shoulders right now, she can’t tell if she’s talking to him or vice versa.
He takes them past one of the major shopping districts in the city, past the Apple store and the Michael Kors shop and the one restaurant her dad took her to when she graduated college where pasta dishes run nearer to forty dollars. These shops, and the nicer mall and a couple business buildings that rise as tall as those downtown, lead into longer stretches of road where trees interspersed with beige or cream apartments begin to take up where businesses once stood. He turns into the familiar subdivision that she remembers; it’s a little older than some, which makes sense if his parents were able to buy and pay it off before they were gone. That also means that none of the houses are the same cookie-cutter versions that tend to make up most subdivisions these days, where houses are identical save for the color and the trim and what children’s toys litter the front yard.
He presses a button on his visor and the garage opens as he maneuvers the car so that he can back up into the driveway. He stays in the driveway, though, the music cutting out—but whatever the case, you're my favorite mistake; more than happy to make you—when he turns the ignition off. She waits for him to come around with his umbrella and he half picks her up to pull her out, holding on to her as he walks her through the garage.
She’s as quiet as he is, taking in her surroundings, trying to get a better sense of who he is by what he’s got going on in his house. There isn’t much in the garage; there are a bunch of boxes neatly stacked on one wall, a couple bicycles in another corner. There is a wall full of tools and a couple tables that have science looking tools on them, like a microscope and several bunsen burners and petri dishes, though nothing looks as if they’re currently being used.
He leads her through a door that opens up into the kitchen as he presses another button to close the garage. His house is as cute on the outside as it is on the inside, although she wonders how he might feel if she were to call it cute. The kitchen is large, done in white, gray, and green, with steel appliances, gray marble countertops, and the look of a place that doesn’t get a lot of use. They both stop to toe their shoes off right outside of the kitchen where a couple other pairs of Barry’s shoes lie. His living room is pretty big: a wide space that features a real stone fireplace as the focal point and a large screen television situated above it; a huge sectional in a slate gray with a few throw pillows; and a big square wooden coffee table. It’s masculine and clean without being gaudy or too bro and Iris wonders if he did this himself because even if she never knew her, she doubts a woman who loved flowers as much as his mother would decorate her living room this way.
The dark curtains on the windows are open wide and Iris can see the backyard but the rain coming down in sheets keep her from being able to make out much besides the patio with what looks like a grill and wicker furniture. Iris remembers being told that his dad had been a doctor and his mom some sort of university researcher and the house matches that.
Barry lets her hand go to tug his sweatshirt off, revealing a plain white t-shirt that rises up over his taut belly. She doesn’t avert her eyes, giving herself permission to track how the sweatpants hang off his slim hips and how he isn’t so much sculpted as he’s hard and tight, with just the beginnings of abs. He catches her staring and he smirks at her before dropping down in the corner of the couch, one leg spread out along the seats of the chair.
“Come here,” he tells her, and she moves toward him, sitting so that her back is pressed against that hard chest and his arms are wrapped around her. She grabs a hold of his forearm with both her hands and settles her head in the crook of his elbow. She’s surrounded by his scent, lemongrass and clean cotton, and for a while, the only sounds are his breathing and the pounding of the rain. He touches her, the hand she’s not holding on to stroking up and down her thigh. Her leggings are pretty thin and she feels his touch fully; if she concentrates enough, she can feel those beloved calluses on his hands. He rubs his hand towards the juncture of her thighs and then over her hip and then back again, and like always, his touch ignites something in her, even as she’s wondering how she might be able to help him out of whatever funk he’s found himself in.
“You ready to tell me what’s up?” she wonders a while later.
“Hmm,” he hums, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Not yet. Tell me about your day.”
She shifts so that she can look back at him, noting the way his eyes have darkened a touch, become grayer like the sky outside, and it’s different from the bright blue-green she remembers from the day of the festival or the wicked blue-gray they always are right before he pushes hard into her.
He blinks down at her and licks his lips slowly. It’s not an explicitly sexual act, even if her body thinks it looks that way, and Iris finds herself lost in it, in whatever he’s emanating. It’s erotic in that it’s intimate, a whirlwind of whatever hurt made him seek her out at Jitters, of whatever still lies unexplored between them, of the attraction that doesn’t ever seem to dissipate.
When she pulls herself out, she tells him, “I was working on a story today. One that made me feel a little bit like how you might be right now.”
“Yeah?”
Wanting to look at him more comfortably, she uses his pause so that she can turn around fully and seat herself on his lap, straddling him. His hands automatically go to her hips, one sliding inside the waist of her leggings so that he can touch her skin.
“Tell me about this story,” he requests. She knows that he’s asking so that he can think about something other than what’s on his mind, so she does, giving a little more than she would originally, working out how she might want to tell the story in her blog.
“It was a couple,” she starts, “that grew up together, in the country. They bonded by playing together in the lake, climbing trees, and playing pranks on each other. And then they start to grow up. Their swimming becomes fraught with tension, the bathing suits showing the same skin, but more, ya know, both of them recognizing the differences, cataloging them, thinking about them, remembering them. They don’t act on it, because they’re friends, and he doesn’t actually understand what it means, that he’s 13 and he keeps dreaming about her at night, waking up with a wet bed and a pounding heart. And then his parents die and her dad, who’s a do-gooder in the community and had been his parents’ best friend, takes him in. Now they’re siblings, but of course not. Regardless, it makes it all harder and odder because she sleeps right down the hall from him, their shared bathroom always smells like her, and he understands now, that he likes her smile and the way she speaks and the curves she seems to develop out of nowhere.”
Barry squeezes at her and she pauses as he asks, “And what about her? How does she feel about him?”
“Well he doesn’t know it, but she’s there too. At first she thinks that she’s just conflating it, confusing their friendship. Because she doesn’t laugh with anyone else like she does with him and she never has as much fun with anyone else as she does him and she never feels as comfortable with anyone else as she does him. He’s her best friend. But she sees him, one night, in his room where the door hasn’t fully closed and he’s, well, he’s masturbating, touching himself, eyes closed and moaning, and for the first time outside of the books she’s read, she feels something. And she knows it’s not just because she’s seen him naked because she’s kissed boys before, she’s felt them hard under her before, but something about this feels different for her.
“But she doesn’t act on it. And he doesn’t either, because remember, he only thinks this is one-sided. They graduate. They go to the same college. But their majors are different and their friends are different. She joins a sorority; he gets into a couple of clubs. Their paths separate, even if they still laugh and talk and be when they’re home for the holidays. Then she gets a boyfriend.”
“She never had a boyfriend before this?” Barry questions.
Iris shrugs. “Sure. But it was high school and the beginning of college. They were mostly hookups that didn’t last. This guy is serious. He’s a couple years older, got his own place, and eventually she moves in with him. Heartbroken, he gets a girlfriend too, one of her friends. That doesn’t last long because she figures out that he’s a little bit in love with the main girl, and then he moves on, to someone sweet, someone who’s been not so subtly hinting that she wants to go out with him.”
Barry seems to be engrossed now. She can’t say that the dark look he was sporting is completely gone, but she can see that he’s not as deep in it, interested in the story she’s weaving.
“They go on to marry these people, even if their hearts are not fully in it. His wife has a kid first, her baby comes next. And meanwhile, they’re still friends. Her dad is still his guardian, so to speak; they are together for whatever holidays they don’t spend with their spouses’ families. They still laugh and talk and be. They still look a little too long and want a little too much.
It comes to a head one Christmas. The gods or fate or just some movement on their parts mean that they both go home to her dad’s house with their spouses and children coming in the next day. But her dad is called in to work so they order take out and watch movies in front of a fire. And they laugh and they talk...and they hug and they kiss and they…
“Be?” Barry tries, a tiny little smile on his face.
She matches it. “Yeah. And it’s beautiful, transcendent. But they’re married. To other people. With kids. So they vow to forget it, to never bring it up again. A couple of years pass. They don’t laugh as much, don’t talk as much. She’s having troubles in her marriage. He is too. He actually consults a divorce attorney because he thinks that it’s unfair to both him and his wife, to live like this. And then the wife dies in a car accident.”
“Oh damn,” he mutters.
“Right,” she agrees. “He’s wracked with grief and more than a little guilt, because he loved her but was never in love with her and she had no idea he was going to leave her.”
“What about her? The one he loves?”
“She’s there for him. She consoles him, cares for him, takes his kid when it gets too hard. Her husband doesn’t like it though. Thinks she’s doing too much, thinks that there’s another reason she’s over at his so much. Later, he learns that this wasn’t a new accusation, that even before she and her husband got married, the husband would question their closeness, would wonder what, if anything, had ever happened between them.
“Eventually she gets tired of it. Her kid is older, in their teens now, and she leaves her husband, packing her things and her kid’s too and moving back in with her dad for a while.”
“And what happens between them?” Barry wants to know.
“He and his son come over more. They hang out more, the four of them, going to dinner and to the movies and to the arcade together. And when their kids are gone, at sleepovers or game nights with their friends, they laugh again, talk again. Fall in love again.”
The ending is implied. Iris closes her eyes when she’s done, letting Barry continue to rub at her back, his fingers so so warm on her skin.
“It's a happy ending,” he says, eventually. “But getting there was a little...depressing.”
Iris chuckles softly, lightheaded again at having gone through that again. It likely didn’t make Barry feel any better, but she’ll take the win that it took his mind away from his own problems, if only for a little while.
“Yeah, it is,” she agrees. “But it reminds me that just because it’s not easy and just because it takes some time, it doesn’t mean that things aren’t worth it.”
He nods, slowly, thinking.
“What about things that are...easy? That come like breathing? That start as a simple dance and just, just keep going?”
She stares down at him and she knows that this is rhetorical. She can see the question in the depths of his eyes, feel it in his hands still kneading her flesh. It would be easy to retreat, to tell him that nothing is ever easy, even if the reality is that it is because they are, because they fall into each other so effortlessly, that she’s terrified. There are always hiccups, obstacles, and the fact that she can’t find any keeps her on edge, waiting, anticipating trouble she knows must be coming. She doesn’t want to believe it, wants to stand firm in them—stand firm in the lyrics she keeps hearing, if you decide to stay, know that there is no escape; there's no one here to save you—and she holds onto that as he asks,
“Don’t you think it’s worth it, Iris? Even if it’s this easy?”
She can’t speak, but his eyes are imploring her to answer. Pleading with her for a response. And however terrified Iris is, or however much Iris tells stories, she is not a liar. So she nods and whispers to him, “yes.”
Without waiting for her to say anything more, he kisses her. He squeezes at her waist and leans up to capture her mouth. She meets him with his same fervor and it’s different, this kiss. She knows the passion of his mouth when he’s high, the boldness when he’s teasing her. But this is new, this is fervor, warmth and agony and doubt and pleasure, all wrapped up together.
(Something also tells Iris that there is another word for this, that this is the part of the story where feelings would be laid on the table, where hearts would be splayed open and she’d say it, or he would, and the other would respond in kind, with declarations of adoration, of infatuation, yearning, of any other word that means what she can’t say yet.
But she feels it, what she’s wanting to say, what she thinks he is saying, in this kiss. It is slow and nasty, all tongue and mouth. Her eyes flutter closed at the feeling, at how he licks into her mouth and then sucks on her bottom lip, at how he licks against her tongue and then holds her face to bring her closer to him. She feels it, she feels it, she feels him…)
He stands, holding on to her, and she wraps her legs around his waist, tightening her arms around his neck as he carries her through the house. The kisses don’t stop, though they become shorter, more mouth now, and he takes her down a long hallway past several doors until he turns into one at the end of the hall. She makes a quick note of the light gray and burnt orange decor, the side tables holding books and knickknacks, the one window that spans nearly the entire wall, but she focuses most heavily on the king-sized bed on which he throws on her, the soft comforter half hanging off the bed.
Her clothes come off first, Barry pulling her sweatshirt over her head and yanking her pants over her hips. He comes out of his own clothes as she discards her underwear, and then he’s between her thighs again. But she wants something else first so she taps his shoulder to flip them and then she’s hovering above him.
She gives him a kiss, slow and sweet, and then she makes her way down his chest, kissing as she goes. She loves the feel of his skin against her lips, likes how his skin tastes as she presses tongue kisses on him. His belly clenches and unclenches under her ministrations, and by the time she’s looking back up at him from her position near his crotch, she can see the way his chest rises and falls with his heavy breathing.
She reaches for him, wrapping her fingers around his dick. It’s long like the rest of him, and thicker than she would have expected just looking at him. It’s a pretty dick, the base the same color as him, the head slightly pinker. It’s a little veiny, but the skin is smooth, and already he’s starting to leak. She lifts her eyes to find him watching her, his own gaze hooded. In her peripheral, she sees his hands grip the bed sheets and she revels in how she hasn’t even done anything and his control is starting to slip.
“Tell me what you want, Bear.”
She says the words softly, but Barry doesn’t miss the cheek that lies under it, if the slight smirk he gives her is any indication.
“Your mouth,” he says. “I’ve been dreaming about that pretty mouth wrapped around my dick.”
She shudders at the tone of his voice, at the vision of her on her knees for him. She likes it.
“I bet you have too,” he guesses.
Without a response, she licks him, holding him at the base and running her tongue up one side of him. She does it again, and then one more time, acquainting herself with the taste of him and the satiny feel of him on her tongue, and then she adjusts and covers the whole of him.
“Fuck,” he breathes out.
She hums around him and she sucks him down, taking him until he hits her throat. Then she pulls back until just the tip remains. She licks around his head and sucks him there, letting the spit pool in her mouth, letting it mix with his own wet. She opens her mouth and lets it slide out, dripping down onto him, and her own body starts to drip at his wrecked whisper, “god, baby, look at you.”
She adds her hands, palming his testicles in one and rubbing her spit down the length of him with the other. She finds a rhythm, sucking him down, inch by inch, hollowing her cheeks as she goes, and then stroking his back up. Barry keeps his hand clenched in the sheets, but he cants himself into her mouth, rocking his hips lightly. She’s getting into it, loving the way he responds to her.
“Come here,” he says, suddenly, reaching for her, and she pulls back with a soft pop.
“Barry?” she furrows her eyebrows in question.
He gives her a gentle smile and grabs at her arm; Iris moves at his request, crawling up his body.
“But you didn’t finish,” she says, pouting a little.
“I know. I want to come when I’m inside you.”
She’s mollified by that, and he settles her on his lap.
“You were so good though, baby,” he says, kissing her. “My good, good girl.”
He reaches down to touch her, slipping his fingers easily into her sex. He groans into her mouth at the feel and he pulls back to ask,
“Is this all for me? Did you get wet sucking me off, good girl?”
She nods, rocking her hips against his hand, against his sex still hard beneath her. “Can, can you…?”
He tilts his head at her, fingers still caressing inside of her. “Can I?”
She huffs out a small laugh because he’s always fucking with her. “You said you wanted to come inside of me,” she reminds him.
“I did, didn’t?” He takes his time removing his fingers, eyes on her as he does. Even with the window curtains wide open, the dark sky has the room dark
(and she doesn’t dismiss the fact that the window faces the side of someone else’s house, where they could be seen if the neighbors were so inclined to watch)
and his eyes look a little like molten lead in the faint rainy light like this. He goes to reach over to his bedside table but Iris stops him.
“I want to feel you,” she says.
He licks his lips and she doesn’t mistake the twitch of his dick she feels under her. “You sure?”
“Yes. I’m on birth control. And I trust you.”
He nods once and again, and then he takes her by her hips and slides her down his cock.
After, Iris decides that this time is the single most erotic experience of her life.
They fuck with the rain like a soundtrack behind them, like a song that swells and stretches, telling their story, but you're so brave; stone cold crazy for loving me; yeah, I'm amazed; i hope you make it out alive, a song that rises and rises, that sounds too good to be real, that might destroy you, but only in the best way.
She rides him, and he’s so full in her like this, so deep in her like this. His back is against his fabric headboard and she’s so close to him, her knees jutting into the headboard, her thighs holding around his hips, her breasts rubbing against his chest, nipples pebbling with each brush on those hard planes.
She holds on to him with her hands holding the back of his neck, softly scratching at the nape. But he’s touching her, always touching her, his hands caressing her spine, and then holding her waist, and then squeezing her hips. He guides her: keeps his favorite pace, smooth and languid; bring her up to the tip and fucks her back down; shows her how he wants her to roll her body when he’s full in her, so her clit is brushing the soft hairs on his pelvis, the sensation incredible.
He uses his mouth too: to kiss her throat, deep tongue kisses that’ll leave marks she knows she’ll have to cover up; to whisper against her mouth, “see how easy this is; see how good, baby; fuck, see how good this is; yes, yes, yes, my good girl.”
And Iris feels so caught up in it. She can’t stop looking at him, loving when the lightning slashes across the room and illuminates those eyes, the constellation of moles on his skin, his wet, pink mouth. Her body hums with pleasure, soaking her thighs and his, tightening around his dick as if it never, never wants to let him go. She voices her satisfaction, in soft sighs and heavy pleas, and his name on her tongue like a chant, or better, a song, “Bear, Bear, Barrryyy.” They’re so close, her skin sticking to his wherever they’re touching, chest to chest and ass to thigh. She feels full and whole and filled...with him and with desire and with, and with love, the thought of it making her shudder and close her eyes.
“No,” Barry whispers. “Don’t. Just let it, just let it...stay here with me. Can you do that for me? Be brave for me?”
She nods, head heavy as her body starts to reach its climax, as her body loosens at the same time that it tightens and she has to fight to hold on to him. “Yes,” she moans again, holding his gaze again.
He touches at her face, holding her cheek and staring back. “Good girl.”
She doesn’t know whose climax triggers the other. She just knows that at the same time that her body explodes, fluttering wildly around him, he comes too, so hard that she feels him throbbing against her walls, that she feels him filling her up with his cum.
He doesn’t let go of her right away. He just holds her, hands at her hip and her face, and then he kisses her, cementing what they’ve just done, cementing what Iris feels for him.
“It’s the anniversary of my mom’s death,” he says, out of the blue. “And when I went to visit my dad earlier, I found out that he’s sick, something with his heart, and I’m-I’m reeling.”
It’s been a long while since they separated and Iris climbed off of him to pad into his bathroom and warm a hand towel under warm water to clean them both. They’ve been lying in his bed, only half under the covers as they let their bodies cool. It’s quiet now, so quiet that Iris has thought he’d fallen asleep; she’d almost fallen asleep. But when he speaks, she blinks wide and then turns her head to face him.
“14 years today,” he adds. He’s looking up at the ceiling as he talks, but Iris feels the hand that’s settled at her waist tighten, the move bringing her closer to him. She understands that he just needs the contact, so she turns so that she’s all the way curled on him, one of her legs thrown across him, her arm tossed over him too, hand settled on his heart. It’s beating slow, steady, and so she strokes his bare chest, right it.
“How’d you find out?”
“I was still at school,” he tells her. “It was a Friday and some of my friends had convinced me to go to a football game, so we were there pretty late. Games could run until 11. I was 17 so I had my own car. It was an old car; we’d bought it from a guy she worked with. By this time, my dad had been gone for a couple years, and my mom was always working late at the lab, so when I got home around 10:30 that night and the lights were out, I wasn’t surprised.”
He shifts a little and continues. “I took a shower, put some leftover pizza in the microwave, and just as I was sitting down to eat, the doorbell rang. It was the police looking for her next of kin to tell them what had happened.” He sighs heavily. “I got lucky. The courts let one of my friend’s parents take me in until I graduated a few months later. I was able to get a work study job in college to pay my bills since the mortgage was already paid off.”
He says it all like he was lucky, but there is nothing lucky about losing both of your parents in that matter, even if one of them was still physically alive. Iris knows from experience that he doesn’t want pity, doesn’t want anyone to feel sorry for his story. But she can’t help the way she wants to comfort him, and so she lets herself do that, tightening herself around him, snuggling even more into his chest.
“How are you feeling about your dad?” she asks, mumbling against his skin.
“Devastated. He looked like, like, I don’t know, like he’s giving up. I don’t get to go see him too often, every couple of months, really. And he looked so different from when I saw him last: smaller, frailer. I think there might be something he’s not telling me. Like he’s been sick longer than he says he has.”
“Is he supposed to get out soon?”
“Another couple years. But I don’t know if he wants to hold on that long.”
She feels them first, the tears. She tries to hold him even tighter, tries to crawl into his skin almost, trying to stem his pain. He doesn’t cry for long, just a few sobs, and then he’s inhaling deeply and wiping at his eyes. But it must be enough because he sounds a little hollow when he says,
“And truthfully, I’m not so much sad as I am mad, that he seems to be giving up. On getting out. On me.”
She hums, not dismissively, but because she understands. “Wanna know a secret?”
“Yeah.”
“Sometimes, I hate my mom.”
He sort of jerks up at that. Not fully, he looks down at her, eyes widened in shock. However inappropriate it might be, she finds herself laughing a little at his expression. Then she explains.
“I know that addiction is not a moral failing. I know that she struggled right up til the end. I know both of those things as completely as I know anything else. But sometimes I wonder why my dad wasn’t enough, why me and Wally weren't enough. I wonder what she was trying to find in those pills that she couldn’t find in us, and I get so pissed that she let it take her away from us.”
She’s startled when he moves. He pulls himself from under her, letting her fall onto her back, and then he’s hovering above her, holding himself up on his elbows. He falls into the spread of her thighs, his sex nuzzling comfortably against her still warm center.
“I’ve seen some of the worst effects of addiction,” he says, “when their bodies end up on a slab of metal and it’s my job to dissect the things around them, to even sometimes help detectives dissect their lives to figure out what happened. And something I’ve learned is that it’s always, always about them. Never about the people they love.”
He searches her face, brushing a piece of hair back from her forehead. “And whatever your mom was or wasn’t thinking, you are enough. You are more than enough, Iris.” He leans down and gives her a kiss, deep and dirty, and she moans in frustration as he pulls back from her. He gives her a grin, one more reminiscent of the Barry she’s used to.
“Repeat after me,” he commands. “I, Iris West…”
“Really, Barry?”
“Yes, come on. I, Iris West…
She sighs, but says it. “I, Iris West…”
“Am more than enough.”
She licks her lips then, blinks, works to not let the tears that have suddenly gathered in the corner of her eyes escape.
“Am more than enough,” she whispers, finally.
Barry’s smile turns fond. “Good girl.”
She shakes her head because she doesn’t know what else to do besides kiss him. Which she does, deeply, reaching down to grip him in her palm. She pauses, just for a moment, to tell him “you know that you are enough too, right?” and she kisses the look of awe off of his face. It’s a long while before she stops kissing him, and then it’s only to moan into his mouth, to let him whisper his dirty somethings into her ear.
“What are your plans for tonight?”
They’ve just shared a shower. Barry is throwing on another pair of sweats and a hoodie and Iris puts her own leggings back on, sans underwear, and thumbs through Barry’s closet for another sweatshirt to put on.
(There’s no reason that she can’t put hers back on, but she’s feeling particularly sentimental and she wants to take something of Barry’s with her, something that smells like him, that feels like him.)
“None, really.” She pulls out a red sweater that reads Central City University Track & Field and throws it on over her bra. “Why? You kicking me out.”
Barry rolls his eyes. “Of course not.” He glances down at the watch on his wrist. “Wanna get dinner? And then go with me to my tattoo appointment? It’s at 8 tonight.”
She smiles at that. “Sure.”
They take the highway back downtown. The rain is still beating steadily and there is still the occasional rumble of thunder, the sporadic flash of lightning. He parks a bit further in the arts district, in front of a restaurant specializing in wood-fire pizzas and craft beers. This time, she knows to wait for him to come around and open the door for her so that she can walk under his umbrella. Once he locks his jeep, he grabs her hand, and they walk the couple doors down and into the restaurant.
The place is brightly lit, in direct contrast to the dark sky and even the faint light that had been on at Barry’s place. The weather assures that it isn’t densely packed, just a couple booths of families and what looks like a couple, so they’re seated quickly and easily. They eat fast since they’ve only got an hour before his appointment. In the meantime, they both keep the conversation light. It’s been a day, for the both of them really, and Iris doesn’t think that she can cry twice in a day.
After he pays, she goes to the bathroom and he tells her he’ll wait at the door for her. She goes in and it’s as brightly lit as the rest of the place and she quickly does her business and washes her hands before heading back out to where he knows Barry is waiting in the little space between the outer door and the door to the restaurant.
She walks through the place and out of the restaurant door, likely too quickly and without really looking. She takes several steps, straightening out Barry’s sweatshirt again, and then she’s bumping into what feels like a solid wall, almost falling backward. A quick hand reaches out to catch her, the hand large, easily wrapping around her forearm.
“Shit,” she says, shaking her head to clear it as she looks up. “I’m sorr..Scott?”
He doesn’t move back right away and so she has to look up, up at the man holding on to her. Scott Evans is the literal definition of tall, dark, and handsome. He’d been her editor when she’d work at CCPN right out of college, and she’d had the biggest crush on him. Tall with dark caramel skin and a neatly trimmed beard, he’d been the one to help guide her in the ways of mass story-telling. They’d gone on one date and Iris is not actually sure why they’d never gone on another.
“Iris West.” He says her name slowly, his grin widening at the same pace. He gives her a once-over, slow and heated. “How’ve you been?”
“R-really good,” she says, stumbling a little at that grin. Even if she doesn’t actually regret never seeing him again, Iris can admit that a man this good looking makes her a little tongue-tied.
“Yeah? I’ve been catching your blog when I can. It’s some good shit, West. I can see why you left our little paper.”
“Please,” Iris rolls her eyes with a little laugh. “There’s nothing little about Picture News.”
He shrugs, humble all the way. “Still, I’m proud of you.”
“Thanks, Scott. I appreciate that.”
“It’s the truth.” He looks down at her, swiping at his lips with his tongue, and she suddenly realizes that they’re still too close. She steps back fully from him, glancing over Scott’s shoulders to see Barry watching them, his expression unreadable.
“Um,” she speaks, catching his attention. “I gotta go Scott.”
“Oh yeah; of course. We should get together soon. Maybe do dinner.” Scott looks back out of the window where rain steadily pours. “It’s still raining out. Can I walk you to your car?”
Her eyes don’t leave Barry’s and he tilts his head, waiting for her answer. “Scott, I’m not alone.”
He turns as if he’s just realizing that Barry is standing there. Barry is still quiet and only lifts his eyes to look at Scott when he mutters, “oh, hey man.”
Barry nods. “What’s up?” Then he looks at Iris. “You ready?”
“Yeah, I am.” Her voice is soft, cautious, and she throws one more glance at Scott. “It was good to see you.”
He graces her with that smile again. “Yeah. I’ll see you around.”
Barry takes her hand and they walk back to the truck. They’re on the road again, driving to a neighborhood near her own. For a second, she thinks he’s going to take her home, but he passes the road to her apartment and goes on to a neighborhood featuring several bars and little shops that cater to the college crowd. He pulls into the parking lot of a place called Black Gold, the lights inside near as bright as those in the pizza place.
Again, she waits until he comes around and turns as if to get out. He stops her though, holding the umbrella high, standing in front of her open legs. He does his thing, his stare like he's trying, and succeeding, to get inside her mind.
“That your ex-boyfriend?” he wonders.
She shakes her head. “Ex-boss.”
His expression doesn’t change. “All your bosses look at you like that?”
She swallows at the sudden feel of his hand on her thigh. The rain is pounding and drops fall on them, but she’s not noticing it. Instead, she’s caught in the storm that’s returned to his eyes, in the feel of his hands inching steadily toward her center.
“Don’t tell me you’re jealous,” she says, instead of responding to him.
One corner of his mouth lifts, and the confident, bordering on cocky, Barry is looking at her now, even if that sparkle hasn’t returned quite yet.
“Nah,” he says. “Not jealous. You’re here right now. And you were with me earlier, moaning for me, coming for me.”
He slides his hand between her thighs and because she is, almost literally, always thirsty for him, wet for him, her legs spread easily. He fingers at the crotch of her leggings, and she knows that he can feel her warmth through the thin material. He thumbs at her until she gasps against him, finding her clit in a way that reminds him that he knows her body better than she knows it herself.
“He ever touch you like this?” Barry asks, voice a whisper above the rain. “Make you whimper even without getting your clothes off?”
She is whimpering, as he keeps his thumb on her clit, rubbing on her in slow circles. That’s all he’s doing: touching her with one hand, looking at her with those eyes that tell as much as they conceal, with his voice a deep rumble that rivals the thunder. He might be turned on, but he’s proving a point, naming himself as someone who, well, who owns her, even if she recognizes that no man should claim any power over her.
Heat spreads through her, a low, simmering sort of heat, but it’s enough that her folds grow slicker, start opening like the flowers of a petal waiting to be plucked. He keeps rubbing at her, staying on her clit, staring in her face, so much that she can’t hold his gaze. Because it feels better than it should, and her wet is soaking through these too thin leggings, and her breaths are coming in longer, coming in heavier.
“Tell me he hasn’t, Iris,” he says, commands, and Iris throws her head back, legs widening at their own volition, hips canting against his hand. “Tell me.”
“No,” she moans, eyes fluttering closed. “He never even touched me at all.”
“Tell me it’s just me,” he adds and she’s too far gone to note the pleading in his voice. “Tell me no one has ever touched you like this.”
“No,” she shakes her head. “Just you, Barry, shit, just you.”
“Good,” he groans. “Good, good girl.”
Even if touch is the word he’s using, Iris understands that it’s more. She understands that they’re both wrapped up in uncertainty, never too sure of where they lie in others’ affections, never too sure of where they lie in life at all. She understands that he’s asking her if she feels it too, if she’s there with him, if this too easy, this too natural, feeling is a first for her too.
He’s asking if she’s brave enough to tell him the truth, if she undertands is meaning-understands that I'm no walk in the park; all these scars on my heart; it’s so dark here-even as she’s wondering the same, as she’s feeling the same, wondering if the churning feelings of abandonment make her unworthy somehow. Wondering if he’ll come to see that unworthiness.
Barry leans forward, just a touch away from her mouth, eyes blazing.
“There’s only you too, Iris,” he says, unprompted. “I swear I’ve just been waiting for you.”
He closes the distance to kiss her and that’s enough to take her over. It’s not a powerful orgasm, not like usual, but it does make her shut her eyes tight, make her limbs seize up as she rocks her hips through it. She breathes out, and she can’t stop the little laugh that comes out.
“You really are a dick,” she muses, opening her eyes slowly.
“A polite one, though,” he says, as he stands straighter and holds his hand out to help her down from the car. He holds the umbrella high over her. “See how I’m making sure you don’t get wet.”
“You didn't think of that earlier.”
His grin is devastating but it doesn’t hide the plethora of emotions in his eyes: the simmering lust, the faint traces of insecurity, the grief that’s been hovering all day...the love she doesn’t think he wants to hide anymore.
She hikes up on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on his cheek, and then she walks beside him into the parlor, words flashing in her head like a sign, but if you’re a warrior, there’s nothing to fear; nothing to fear.
And later that night, as she cuddles up next to Barry is his large comfortable bed, she listens to his soft breathing, the sound a melody to the rain still pattering against his windows. She listens and she stares at him, taking in his features, softer than they were before, the stress of today easing away with every second he’s lost to sleep. A flash of lightning lights the room, and it catches her eyes again, the new tattoo, the purple ink bright on his skin, covering the space from a lily on his shoulder to just over his heart. It goes dark again, his room blanketed once more, but in her mind’s eyes, she can still see the vibrant ink on his skin, the pretty drooping petals of an iris.
Cause you're so brave
Stone cold crazy for loving me
Yeah, I'm amazed
I hope you make it out alive
20 notes · View notes
krisdreaming · 4 years
Note
hi! i don’t know if you’re tired of writing them, but the scenario with iwa and kuroo was the cutest thing ever :((( is it alright if i ask for the same thing with tsuki? thank you!
Ahh, that whole 4+1 trope/concept is one of my favorites, so I’m not tired of it at all! I’d love to write for Tsukki ^^ This is a third year AU!
Edit: 4+1 masterlist is here
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Four times Kei thinks he loves you, and the one time he finally says it out loud.
i.
When you meet Kei in his classroom for lunch, you’re carrying two bento boxes. He doesn’t have time to ask you about it, because the moment you sit down next to him you push one toward him.
“Here, I made this for you.” You smile at him, almost bashful. “You haven’t been eating a lot at lunch lately, but I know you must get hungry. Ah, I hope it’s okay that I did that.” After all, the two of you haven’t been dating for so long, only a few months.
“Oh. Well, thank you,” Kei can’t hide his surprise or the small smile that finds itself on his face. “Of course it’s okay.” Why wouldn’t it be? The fact that you’d though of him does strange things in his chest. He pulls the bento closer to him, tugging open the neat knot you’d made in the cloth.
“I did a little research,” You add when the meal is finally unwrapped. “So I put in lots of protein and other stuff that you’ll need for volleyball. Can’t have you getting tired out.” You giggle, and he looks from the carefully prepared meal to your face, smiling expectantly. The feeling in his chest is starting to twist into something else, and it hits him right as his chopsticks are hovering over the rice. I love you. Huh.
“Thank you,” He says again instead, hand coming to rest on top of yours. “Really. This means a lot.” For just a few moments, the world comes to a stop, and he gives your hand a gentle squeeze, hoping it’s enough.
ii.
“I’m sorry. I know this isn’t ideal,” You say when you let Kei in. “It’s just that the babysitter bailed at the last minute, and they haven’t been able to go out just the two of them for so long.” You’re bouncing the baby in your arms, and Kei can’t not notice the tender way you’re holding him.
“It’s alright.” He shrugs his bag off his shoulder. “Ah, so what’s his name?” He peers stiffly down at the child, sleepy eyes already drooping shut. 
“Hitoshi.” You coo, poking your fingertip gently on the tiny nose, which scrunches up at the touch. “Do you want to hold him?” You offer suddenly, catching Kei off guard so much that he nods.
“Okay.” That quickly, you move to settle the baby in Kei’s arms, gently positioning its head in the crook of his elbow. Once he’s situated, you rest your cheek on Kei’s shoulder, peering down at him.
“Isn’t he so precious?” You ask in a whisper, and Kei doesn’t answer right away because he’s all too aware of your hands wrapped around his arm and the gentle look on your face. He sort of likes it. “Hm?” You prompt, and Kei almost jumps.
“Yeah, sure.” He says a little too gruffly. “He’s cute.” He turns and looks at you with three words stuck in his throat, but doesn’t say anything more. This might not be the best time to say it, anyway.
iii.
The evening air is cool as he walks you home, and the light from a streetlamp is playing across your face. You and Kei had just shared a piece of strawberry shortcake at your favorite little cafe, and it’s almost as though he can still taste the sweet berries on his tongue. You giggle, and he thinks maybe it’s your laughter, instead.
He slips his hand into yours, tugging you a little closer to his side because everything comes a little easier in the moonlight. Your conversation is light, chattering about nothing. About everything. He runs his thumb down yours, and at the gesture you pause in what you’re saying to smile softly at him. I love you bubbles up again, and really, tonight might be the perfect time to say it, but before he can work up the nerve, you’re standing in front of your house.
“Thanks, Kei. That was a lot of fun.” You face him, tilting your chin up so that you can see his face better. “I missed nights like this.”
“Me too,” He says softly. “I’m sorry, it’s just with volleyball and all-” You stop him before he can continue.
“You don’t need to apologize to me,” You say firmly. “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m really proud of you, you know? And I hope you know that you have my full support. No matter what. I’ll always be here to cheer you on.”
“I know.” He says, and lets his fingers skim your cheek before leaning in and kissing you, soft and sweet. Your arms wrap around his neck and he puts those three words behind the pressure of his lips.
“Good night, Kei.” You say when you finally pull away.
“Good night,” He echoes, and you lift your hand in a quick wave and turn toward the house before he can say another word.
iv.
Kei catches you in his arms with a soft oof. “I really missed you!” You say, muffled into his shoulder, and he holds you a little tighter.
“I was only gone for one week.” He says, laughter in his voice. 
“Yeah, I know.” You finally pull away to pout at him. “How was the training camp? Were you too busy, or did you have time to miss me?”
He huffs out a laugh. “Oh, it was just as intense as usual. I swear, Hinata and Kageyama are insane. I don’t know if they even slept. They’re worse than the first years.” He shakes his head, and you laugh softly. He missed that sound. “And yes,” He confirms, “I suppose I had a little bit of time. To miss you.” 
You feign a gasp, reaching up to rest your hand on his forehead. “Kei, are you feeling alright?” He narrows his eyes. “To think my stone cold boyfriend would actually admit to missing me!” You splay your hand dramatically on your chest. 
“I’m not stone cold,” He rebuts, crossing his arms across his chest. 
“Weeelll...” Your giggle turns into a shriek as he hooks an arm around your middle, dragging you back against his chest.
“Take it back!” He threatens, lips tantalizingly close to your neck.
“Or?” You shoot him a cheeky grin.
“Hm, glad you asked.” He nuzzles his nose into the juncture of your shoulder and neck, then presses a kiss there. Here, with you in his arms just like this, he feels incredibly light. I love you, I love you, I love you. For each time the words play through his mind, he presses another kiss to your skin.
He had missed you, and it was more than a little.
v.
Graduation. It’s hard to believe the day is finally here. In some ways, Kei still feels like the gangly first year he’d once been, brooding his way through life. He doesn’t think it’s quite sunken in yet that his time here is over. A lot is going to be changing in the next weeks and months, except, he hopes, for one thing. 
The ceremony passes by in a blur of faces and names, and when it’s over he’s clutching his diploma in his hand and scanning the crowd for you. When he finally catches sight of you, you’re already headed in his direction.
“It’s a good thing you’re so tall,” You laugh. “Finding you in a crowd is always easy.” He smiles. “We did it!” You continue, “Can you believe it? We graduated. It almost doesn’t feel real.”
“Well, it’s real,” He says, reaching into his pocket and closing his hand around the cool metal object inside. You’re still chattering as you walk, and he holds onto it until it’s become warm from the heat of his hand. Finally, when the crowd has begun to thin and you find yourselves in front of the school beneath a budding tree, he draws out his hand.
“Hey, Y/N.” You look at him then, expression growing more serious at the tone of his voice. He holds out his closed fist, and after a moment’s hesitation, you extend your hand. He drops the second button of his uniform jacket into it, feeling his cheeks heat up even though he’d promised himself he wouldn’t blush about this. You look from the button to his face with wide eyes, and he nods, smiling, something he can’t quite contain.
“Kei,” You say his name softly at the same time as he begins speaking.
“I love you.” It’s easy. It feels right. “And that’s not going to change, no matter what. You are-” He cuts off, not sure what word can begin to describe everything you are to him. “You’re the most important person in the world to me.”
“Kei.” You say his name again, clutching the button tight in your fist. Your smile is wobbly, but wide. “I love you, too.”
He cups the back of your neck, drawing you closer for a kiss. “I love you,” He says again, against your lips.
-
(If you don’t know, it’s a sort of tradition in Japan for male students to give the second button from their uniform jacket to their crush / s/o as a symbol of their love etc, & from the little I’ve read it isn’t actually super common but it’s cute, darn it, so I used it)
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msmarvelwrites · 4 years
Text
The Winter Ghost - Part 13
Info: A Devastating car crash causes you to lose your memory and start over. The only thing left in the wreckage was the horrific nightmares which plagued your mind. If you knew what today would entail you would have just stayed in bed. But you didn’t and because of that, everything you knew was about to change.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Warnings: Swearing, angst, some smutty thoughts... 
w/c: 2.2k
A/N: Lucky number 13! I’m honestly so caught off gaurd by all the love Ive been receiving on The Winter Ghost. I see all your late night binge sessions and I am SO immensely greatful for your interest. When I first started writing this I didnt really think anything of it, but youve all lit a fire under my ass and for that, I thank you! So please, enjoy and reblog and like if you feel so inclined. 
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His hot breath fanned across your face, sending you into a frenzy like state you had never known before. Heavy breathing, mostly on your part as he placed excruciatingly slow kisses across your jaw. You needed him. More than you’d ever needed anything in your life. It made you sick. 
“Are you afraid?” He asked in a low seductive voice. Swiftly he wrapped his metal fingers around your throat, applying enough pressure to make you gasp. You clawed at his chest, drunk on his murderous touch. You wanted him to make you hurt as bad as your heart did. You couldn't possibly hate a person more than you hated yourself right now. 
“Answer my question.” He shouted, sending a ripple of ecstasy through your body. 
“No. I could never,” You gasped, choking as the walls of your throat began to collapse. 
“Liar.” He sneered. 
You let out an involuntary moan. 
“You good, Y/n?” Sam asked, sitting next to you on the couch as he, Nat, Wanda and Shuri all ate breakfast around the kitchen island. Your hand was lightly wrapped around your neck where Bucky’s was just a moment ago. 
“Yeah, fine.” You squeeked.
But you weren't. You hadn’t been since that morning in the hallway with Bucky. You could still feel the sting he had left behind from his touch. What was wrong with you? You couldn't even begin to unpack that question. Psychiatric help would be a start, though. 
After your memory had returned, the nightmares seemed to subside, only to be replaced with the image of Bucky, devoid of all emotion, seething in rage at your quips. By the third night, you would have gladly have traded, knowing that this was so much worse. 
You couldn't keep excusing your vile thoughts as his fault. They weren't, not entirely. You were the one waking up a needy mess every morning.
“Hey.” Bucky's husky voice filled your senses causing you to stiffen at the sound. The team around you said their hello’s while you tried to refrain from gawking. You had done your very best to avoid him as much as you could, but there were only so many places to hide. Whenever you bumped into each other he would keep his head down and you would run in either direction.
“Steve’s on his way back today. He left to meet Vision and gather intel on an active Hydra base located somewhere on the border of Germany.” Wanda’s eyes lit up at the mention of the name. This must be the famous Android she's always gushing about.  
“Pack up… We ship out first thing tomorrow morning.” Bucky declared, peaking your interest. It had been way too long since you had been back in the field, this was amazing. You could feel the excitement bubbling out of your chest vanish when Bucky’s eyes glanced at you. 
“Y/n, you can uh, keep Shuri company while we're away.” You blinked at him, unsure if you had heard him correctly. 
“No fucking way.” You scoffed. You were not missing out on this opportunity to give Hydra a taste of their own ‘serum’, so to speak. 
‘Captain's orders.” He deadpanned, averting his gaze to the ceiling. You stared at him, lost for words with needy eyes. He’d never tell you, but it terrified him when you looked like that. Small, fragile, though he knew better. He would kill himself before he tainted you. But that didn't make the idea any less intriguing.
“And since when do you listen to Captain's orders?” Nat spoke up before you even got the chance. You nodded violently, looking back to Bucky who only sighed. 
“You know very well why she can't go.” He muttered, fighting tooth and nail not to look at you again. You could sense his uncomfortability but you couldn't look away. 
“She’s not going, then I’m not going.” Wanda sulked. 
“Me too.” Sam mocked her tone. “Seriously, Buck. She’s a tank, we could use her.” He finished, more serious this time. 
Bucky huffed, pinching the bridge of his nose between his flesh fingers. “You gotta take that up with Steve. He and I aren't really on the best of terms right now.” He spoke, annoyance dripping from the last sentence. 
“Easy, I’ll take care of it.” Nat said to Bucky, but she sent a wink at you. 
You were so excited you almost leaped from your seat. You couldn't wait to blow some shit up!
……………………………………….
The next morning you woke up extra early, just to get a jump on everything. Nat had fought with Steve all last night, but eventually he conceded on the sheer fact that if you were there, it would mean double the Wanda power. This was a big base, one he had known of for quite some time now, but it required extra attention. They had been working on recreating your serum, but so far to no avail. You knew exactly where they were going wrong of course. But Steve explained they had been testing it out of Hydra members. The lucky few who survived may not have your powers, but they were still strong. He’d need all the help he could get.
After you were packed you dragged your duffle to Shuri’s lab. She had been working on a few new weapons she wanted you to pack. Just in case, she said. You got there in no time flat, literally vibrating with excitement. 
“You're sure about this?” She asked. 
“Absolutely.” You beamed. She signed, and handed you a small ring. 
“What's this?” You asked, holding the small band in your fingers. 
“It’s a beacon. It will help you hold onto your borrowed energies for longer. It’s like a mini you, only better.” She paused, “Speaking of, are you going to tell me what's in that serum of yours or am I just going to have to keep guessing?”
“I think it’s better kept unsaid. That thing had already caused enough problems. No one should be burdened with it.”
“Maybe so.” She signed.
“Thank you Shuri. For everything.” You half heartedly smiled but before you could leave her arms were around you, pulling you into a hug. You sucked in a breath and tapped her on the back in reciprocation. Physically affection was never something you were good at showing, try as you may. 
When you finally pulled away she sent you a soft smile, and wished you good luck on the mission before you headed out the door. 
……………………..
“Nice of you to grace us with your presence.” Steve muttered, when you finally got to the jet when the rest of the team was loading up.
“It is, isn't it?” You spoke sweetly, throwing your duffle onto the jet. You still weren't really sure where you stood with Steve. Of course you knew of the famous Captain America, even if you didn't remember a few weeks ago. But never did you imagine he would be such a class act dick. Or maybe he was just that way with you? The idea made you smirk, knowing you were the only one to really piss off the Captain was honestly the highest form of flattery. 
You boarded the jet and noticed the rest if the team already suited up. The tactical gear Shuri had made you was tight, and Natasha was living proof of that. I mean, it wasn't fair she had the body of a trained ballerina and New York supermodel. The woman was easily the most beautiful woman you had ever seen while your gear clung to you in all the least flattering ways. 
You quickly shook off the self doubt. It didn't matter how you looked, you were here to kick some ass. 
Well, not exactly. 
That morning Steve had announced that while the rest of the team ‘kicked ass’ you and the Soviet spy would sneak into their mainframe and collect the data of whatever new evil scheme Hydra was working on. 
Though you weren't thrilled to be stuck on recon duty, it was better than nothing. Besides, you were just a little rusty. Though Nat and Sam kept you busy and Wanda had taught you all her tricks, you weren't sure that if it came down to it you'd be able to pull the trigger. 
Better safe than sorry. 
“Are you nervous?” Bucky spoke under his breath, his voice deep and rough. You shivered at the sound. You hadn't realised until this moment that he was seated directly behind you. 
“Are you?” You asked. You tried to add some bite to your words, but they left your lips softly. The tone seemed to surprise Bucky as much as it did you as he half expected to to tear his head off again.
“Sometimes. But, not now.”
“Oh yeah?” Words betraying you once again. 
Ignore him. 
Stop talking to him. 
Stop. Talking. 
Bucky's tongue slipped from between his lips, tugging on his bottom one slowly and effectively knocking you back from your annoying thought and to the glorious man sitting behind you. 
“Yeah. Got this new girl on our side. She’s a totally badass. I know she’ll watch my six.” He shrugged causing a small smile to pull at the corner of your mouth. 
“How do you know she won't just leave you for dead?” She asked, playing along. Part of you, however, was just a little curious. Part of you wanted to ask yourself the same question. In a second, would you protect the man who murdered Tommy? Honestly you weren't really sure. 
“Just a feeling.” He spoke so casually. So sure, you wanted to believe him. It would be easy enough to feed him to Hydra, but you and him both knew you wouldn't have the stomach for it. 
“Huh. You sound pretty confident in that.” You sneered sarcastically.
He just gave you a small shrug, leaning back into his seat and pulling his bluetooth earbuds out of his back pocket. He offered one to you casually. Before you could protest your arm shot out and took it, placing it in your right ear. 
“I like to listen to music before a mission. It calms me.” He suggested, opening his phone, scrolling through his songs before the intro to Highway to Hell began playing. 
A grin spread across your face “I love this song!” You beamed. 
“I know. I remember you telling me something about spending an entire year listening to AC/DC cause’ your dad loved their music. I downloaded a few of their albums after that. Not exactly what I’m used to, but definitely good ass kicking music.” He nodded. 
That stopped you dead in your tracks. You couldn't help the smile that faded quickly from your lips at his words. You were, to say the least, shocked. You must have mentioned your love for the band at some point, but honestly couldn't for the life of you remember when.  
But he did. And he listened to it because you liked them. 
“Huh.” You repeated, turning back around and trying to suppress the butterflies that began erupting out of your stomach. You could hear Bucky behind you drumming his hands on his thighs along to the song. You couldn't help but giggle at how offbeat he was.
“Take off in five minutes. Everyone ready?” Nat spoke through your coms. Everyone gave a thumb up as the jets engine whirled on, vibrating through the aircraft.
You listened carefully as your song faded away and the next one took its place. 
Do I wanna know? If this feeling flows both ways?
You could physically feel Bucky’s mood shift behind you. The Super Soldier serum granting you access to his quickened heart beat and the lyrics mirrored the every present emotions you had been feeling this week.
Sad to see you go. Was sorta’ hopin’ that you’d stay. 
You let your mind wander as you listened to Bucky hum along quietly to the song, low and soft. The sound sending chills down your spine as the memory of your dreams from the past few nights replayed over in your mind. 
Baby, we both know. That the nights were mainly made For sayin' things that you can't say tomorrow day.
Bucky’s lips trailed along your swollen throat, the feeling of pleasure over bruises he had left behind caused you to moan in ecstasy. The way he kissed you, not like before. This time full of lust and something dark. His hands dipped under your shirt, the feeling of hot and cold sending you over the edge as your eyes rolled back in your head. You wanted nothing more than for him to throw you against a wall, any wall and tear you limb from limb.
“I like this song too.” Bucky’s breath fanned across the back of your ear, rocketing you back to the Jet that was beginning to take off. You looked around the small space, praying that Bucky was the only one to notice your breath hitch in the back of your throat. 
Any reminisce of the idea that you had to stay away from Bucky shattered into a million pieces. The hate, still ever present, but you knew damn well that would be the best part. It only fueled your desire. He was going to be the death of you.
Or even better, you'd be the death of him...
.....................................................................................................................
A/N: Gah! Thank you for reading! And thank you to @cutie1365​ for being the best hype woman/ editor around lol. Leave a like or reblog if you wanna show some love. I hope yall’ are having a great week! 
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