#hes just....... so shaped..... hes just a guy........
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scentedluminarysoul · 1 day ago
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One German politician, who will likely run for chancellor next year, got really confused
Context: he's a Nazi and hates gendering and women. As you may know, German is a very gendered language. Our "neutral" for occupations and such is actually the male form, so you can imagine that that shapes thinking.
So, the female form is often formed by attaching "in" to the male form. The plural would attach "innen"
But "innen" can also mean "inside"
So. Certain cuts of meat are called "Innenfilet"
There was a tweet by that guy being super angry when he spotted that on a package of turkey meat, saying "I'm sure the turkeys are really happy to be gendered correctly"
When. It had nothing to do with gender and just described the type of cut
Anyway. People are really fucking angry at nothing for no reason, just to be angry
Again, this guy, a Nazi, might become chancellor next year...
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the filling in question was chicken
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alchemistc · 2 days ago
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Harry twirls a lock of dark curls between his fingers. Tips his chin against Tommy's head and stares up at the ceiling. He considers not asking, this time.
The sex is good, and Tommy's funny, and if he closes his eyes he could imagine there could be something - Tommy twitches and shifts his hand lower like he might be gearing up for another round, and it breaks the fantasy. That's new.
"Tell me about him," Harry says, and Tommy's eyes tip up to glare at Harry.
"Making an assumption, there," Tommy warns, but Harry just raises an eyebrow. Six years of this and Harry knows better than to expect Tommy would show up at his door for any reason other than to get his mind off of something - someone else.
"So we're both asses," Harry intones. He needs to call the super, see what they'll do about the water stain on his ceiling. "Tell me about him."
Tommy sighs. Twists, drifts away to the second pillow, and Harry's done this enough times not to mourn the loss, exactly. It's not like he's ever told Tommy -
"He's too young. Impulsive. New."
Harry fails to hold in his snort. "Okay."
Tommy at 34 had been a fucking hurricane. Newly out, no holds barred, he'd jumped right into the deep end and let the storm whirl him around. They'd been friends, for the first six months, Harry a watchful presence while Tommy made it his mission to be more than the guy in the dark corner getting a risky blowie fifteen minutes before last call. To be out - not loud, that wasn't Tommy's style - but to at least be himself.
He'd lasted two months in a real, actual relationship before he'd shown up at Harry's door with a six pack and a box of condoms.
"He looks at me and sees this - cool suave guy -" Harry shifts, nearly interrupts because that guy is exactly what Tommy projects, even if he doesn't mean to. Fucking Scorpios. "- and I was falling for him."
Yeah. Harry can extrapolate from that. Tommy fell ass over tea kettle and then got spooked.
"He's just so fucking open with himself. No brainworm goes untouched, and he can't hide his emotions for shit, and he's so goddamn stubborn and so goddamn ready to bulldoze through every hurdle ahead without looking back at the damage, and..." Tommy trails off. One hand shifts down to hitch the duvet up over his hips, and Harry adds the duvet cover to his list of laundry. "I gave him too many chances to slow down on his own."
"What, did the kid ask you to marry him or something?"
"He's the Himbo," Tommy retorts, and it takes Harry a moment to make the connection. He whistles through his teeth just to watch the scowl fall into place on Tommy's face. "And the connection freaked him out so much he asked me to move in. To his bachelor pad loft." Harry waits. "It has two balconies, Harry. Two."
"...he knows you have a mortgage, right?"
Tommy shoves at his shoulder. "It doesn't matter. We're just - the timing wasn't right."
"Did you want it to be?"
That's always the thing he ends up hung up on, in Harry's experience. Tommy's scared out of his mind to be the right person at the wrong time. Always has been. There's probably some mommy or daddy issues hidden in there somewhere he hasn't explored. Tommy's eyes drift up to the water stain. "Don't these apartments all have the same layout?"
This is the shove-off. This is his hint not to push. "Yes, and I really don't want to ask how the upstairs neighbor flooded their bedroom. Back to the guy." He's never been one for acknowledging unspoken cues.
"Buck," Tommy says, and the name sounds harsh in his mouth.
"Buck," Harry repeats, and pictures Tommy's usual type - tall, light-eyed, more smiles than common sense. There was always something distinctive, too - freckles, a scar, weird shaped ears.
"I miss him."
It doesn't hurt the way it had those first few years, when Harry was convinced that eventually Tommy would see him as more than a friend to blow off steam with. Still. There's a twinge there, beneath his rib cage.
"So stop missing him. That's an option, isn't it?"
And Tommy does that thing - that frustrating, enchanting thing, where his whole body seems to hold the emotion flickering across his face. "I walked out on him. I dug the damn knife in just to make sure he wouldn't try to convince me to stay."
"Would you have? Stayed?"
Tommy's quiet. The sweat has cooled on his skin, and the lights coming in through his window dance across the skin of his shoulder, his chest, that stupid thick neck of his.
The phone he left on the bedside table is dark, but that doesn't stop Tommy's gaze flicking to it.
"Cards on the table, Tommy?" Harry sucks in a breath. Blows it out through his nose. "Once upon a time, I convinced myself you were it for me. That I'd be satisfied with what you gave me, and I wouldn't ask for more. I cut you out of my life for eight months when I realized how fucking dumb that was."
Tommy frowns. Harry hadn't really ever expected him to notice.
"I've seen you through shitty relationships, and one sided ones. I've heard all the bullshit you and Greg put each other through. I've been there for every fucking heartache."
And he'd offered up his body like it was absolution for always being fucking thrilled when a relationship ended.
"You called me Evan," Harry murmurs, and Tommy's eyes go wide. That's never fucking happened before. This thing wouldn't have lasted nearly as long if he'd ever heard another man's name in his bed before. "You should shower. Go home. Take a day or two, if you need it. But I know for a fact you wait this shit out, justify coming to me with time and space from whatever guy has you strung out. I know it's been a minute already, and I know you've never sounded so unsure about cutting someone loose."
Tommy's gaze flicks to him.
"Whatever it is that's got you so scared of this guy, figure it the fuck out. Because it sounds to me like you fell fast and hard and hit a fucking wall before you ever thought to tap the brakes. That's not fair to you or him. Call him. Text him. Show up at his door with a bouquet or an industrial size bottle of lube and figure your shit out. Together."
Tommy stares at him for a long, long time in silence.
"Them's the brakes, huh?"
Harry hates that he knows exactly what Tommy means. Still, he clarifies. "This is your forever guy." Six years of watching him flail and learn and grow and hurt and love and fuck. He knows a thing or two about Tommy and his flights of romance. Knows this lonely man has never sounded quite so lonely before. "You don't need me, anymore."
He's quiet as his eyes drift back up to the stain. "I'm not his forever guy." Harry can't actually refute that, considering he's never met the guy. But he knows Tommy. Knows exactly how captivating he can be. Knows Tommy's a sucker for that starry-eyed look that so often has meant not love, as Tommy reads it, but idolization. "What if I'm not his forever guy?"
Harry digs toes into the spot in the duvet where Tommy's knees should be. He shifts Tommy about half a millimeter. "He has a nickname you don't call him except when you're punishing yourself. He dated Abby and that shared history didn't scare him off. You'd never let yourself fall for a guy that wasn't throwing clear signs that it was serious. I'd put my odds on him doing something weird and wholesome every time he thinks about you until his entire two balcony loft is filled with trinkets or treats and he still can't get you off his mind."
Harry's never seen Tommy's face do that before. Not in the throes of a honeymoon phase and not in the worst of a bad breakup. It's some awful mixture between unbridled hope and abject despair.
Harry thinks it's probably fair to hate him a little, for that face. He's earned the right.
"If he kicks you to the curb, I'll take you to one of those expensive wine tastings you pretend to hate, and I'll let you drink all my samples too." It's not an idle promise. Tommy may pretend to hate it but Harry fucking loves wine tastings. "If he doesn't..." Harry shoots him a fond look, "...knowing your type I'm not invited to the wedding anyway, so I guess then I'd been seeing you around."
Something shadows his gaze for a moment, but he's quick to hide it, to smack Harry on the chest like they've just had a good game, to shift out of bed and into his briefs before Harry can blink. He doesn't love Tommy. Not the way he'd have liked to, years and years ago. Still, when Tommy shoots him the dorkiest finger guns known to man and scoops up the rest of his clothes to take to the bathroom with him, Harry still wonders what it's like to have him enough to love him fully.
---
The name catches him off guard every time he hears it. 'Evan' isn't hard to filter - Evan had been a popular enough name to immediately write it off but Buck wasn't white noise of a name
Buck was a character in a movie, an old grizzled war vet, a dog. The name Buck wasn't popular enough not to hear it every time it was so much as whispered in his direction.
The coffee shop isn't crowded, but it's not dead either. When the girl at the counter calls out an order for Buck, sliding three cups down the counter, Harry can't help but look up.
A tall broad shouldered hulk of a man smiles a dimpled smile at the barista, and Harry watches him palm two cups and grab the third one in one practiced move. He's cute, Harry thinks. Maybe his grandpa ordered, Harry thinks, a little harder, and then caves, following his path through the three-tops littering the lobby.
Harry catches sight of him without being noticed. He's grinning, one of those rare earnest ones that make his ears rise and his face crinkle like a Shar Pei, hand spread out over something lying open on the table. The little girl on the seat to his right is a surprise, but Harry hasn't spoken to Tommy in two years. Maybe he's had enough time to get his mind around the idea that he's nothing like his father. The girl responds to something Tommy says by palming at as much of his face as she can reach and turning to the man now approaching their table.
"Uncle Buck!" he catches, another firm tug at the part of his brain that's been stuck on this for too long. The man barely gets all three drinks on the table before the girl is launching herself up into his arms, and it's too late for Harry to turn away without notice. Tommy's gaze shifts across the room and lands right on him.
He looks like he might wave Harry over, and Harry would rather die than know whether Tommy would introduce him as an old friend, or by name like Buck should know it. He tips a smile Tommy's way. Raises a brow at the man - Buck - and gets lips being sucked behind teeth in response, and then a slow, subtle head tilt.
Good. Good for him. Harry's never wanted anything for Tommy but to see him incandescently happy.
Witnessing it from a distance is better.
Buck twirls his - niece? - flops her back down on the bench seat next to Tommy and bends to say something that includes a pinky promise. He's got a wine-dark stain just above his brow, and Harry can't quite hide the tip of his smile.
Harry's name rings in his ears as he picks up his drink, and he's halfway to the door, feeling proud of himself for not turning back, when he hears the chorus of three laughs erupting from the corner where he'd taken his last good look.
He'd seen the ring on insta, a week and a half ago. Just an uncaptioned picture of two bands balanced one over the other on a rock, a killer sunset sky blurry behind them. No tags. 102 likes and counting.
Harry pushes through the doors and only glances through the window to watch Tommy tip his head back in laughter for a second, before he's cleared the coffee shop and rounded the corner back to his office.
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dcxdpdabbles · 2 days ago
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ok but office supplier is even funnier if jason hasn't been declared legally alive again and danny starts dating him thus allowing him to both be and not be part of the wayne family
"I have a date," Danny says one random morning as he refills the office snack bar. Danny, in his own words, is one of the highest-paid employees. He has chosen to create a snack center for all Wayne employees. He has one on every three floors, filling it with fruits, chips, chocolate, pudding, and drinks.
And a cabinet with free samples of stationery supplies he thought more people should know about. Next to the supplies, he wrote the name of the product, where to buy, and even recommendations of
Everyone felt really touched by this and started bringing snacks and drinks to help him. Half the time, Danny only refilled the stationary since everyone was happy to have a community snack bar.
"A what!?" Jack from accounting gasped. Danny didn't pay him any mind; he was too busy picking between the flower and moon mini-planners.
Both were pocket-sized, but one had a workout addition, while the other had a section to track books for readers. He felt like there were more readers than gym goers, but he didn't want either to miss out if he picked one over the other.
"A date," he responded after placing both options inside the basket. He'll have to wait to introduce the amazing erasable pens he found, but he could make it up next month.
"With who?" Demanded Sara. She worked in PR and had been attempting to have him attend at least three parties with the Waynes in the past month alone.
"Peter. I met him a week ago at a street fair. One of the personal pen makers I follow would have a booth, and I was dying to see them." Danny pulls a box from his pocket, showcasing the fancy navy blue pen. "This is the George Washington Battle of Princeton edition. It has the painting of the battle wrapped around it, with careful silver-golden details on the cap to resemble the colonial era and a golden-edged nib; this is one fine fountain pen. It cost me five thousand and nine hundred dollars."
"Danny, please focus- five thousand? You spent five thousand on a pen!?"
Danny puffs out his chest, smiling broadly. "It was worth every penny!"
"That's-never mind. Are you sure Peter is a good person?" Jack pressed, "Because I know a great man. Mr. Drake-Wayne! Wouldn't you rather go on a date with him?"
"But Peter bought me easrsers that were shaped like fried chicken. They came in bucket. See." He ramages through his bag until he pulsl out a palm-szed bucket with chicken shaped earses inside. "Isn't it cool?"
"I'll admit that's pretty cool," Sara conceded but shared a quick glance with her coworkers. Danny wonders why they all look so worried. This wasn't that expensive. Peter only used ten dollars for it. "Do you like Peter?"
"I don't know. It's just a first date." He shrugs. "I don't usually have those. Not many people are willing to listen to me ramble about stationary."
"You know who would love to listen to you?" Jack throws an arm around Danny's shoulder. "Mr. Drake-Wayne!"
"Mr. Grasyon-Wayne!"
"Mis Wayne!"
"Mr. Wayne!" Everyone turns to stare at Gary, who flushes, "Bruce Wayne, not Damian!"
That caused some head nods and a few scattered comments about how the age gap was still alarmingly large, but if both were consenting adults, who were they to oppose it? Danny stared back as everyone debated whether Danny and Mr.Wayne should date.
He glances down at his heart-shaped notepads and figures they are right. It's not like he has any feelings about this date. He just agreed to get the passers.
Taking out his phone, he sends Peter a message to cancel their date. He should go out with someone because he likes them, not because they may allow him to discuss his interests.
Jason despairs somewhere on the other side of town as he reads the text for his second persona- a living citizen Peter Todd- from the guy who he saw at the street market going gaga over pens. The guy was so cute, too.
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wonderjanga · 3 days ago
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Here's a stupid dumb crack idea you can't really die in Fawcett City like you can get hurt cartooningly but you can't die like getting hit in the head when it acts of like a mild inconvenience and gives you a headache and a scar but you won't die from it
If you leave faucet for a long time then you can die but everyone there is Immortal and kind of unaging unless you want to age
Captain marvel forgot to tell the Justice League this while fighting a villain who proceeded the flash when acts in the head
People in Fawcett don’t die. That was something the Justice League hadn’t known when Marvel had called them for help to fight some villain. Everything was going fine and dandy at first. They were winning, obviously, but then something just had to happen. A piece of the rubble somehow, you couldn’t ask any of them, fell on the fastest man alive who wasn’t able to dodge for whatever reason?Everyone, besides Marvel and the villain, who were still fighting by the way, went quiet as a mouse.
Supes: *looks horrified* “Oh my Rao! Flash!?” *flies over and lifts the rubble up*
Flash: *wobbly stands up, springing up and down like an accordion* (accordion squash)
Marvel and the villain didn’t even look their way, meanwhile, everyone is trying to get Flash to stop being a human accordion.
Supes: “Keep him still!”
GL: “I’m trying!” *using his ring to try and hold Wally still*
Batman: “Try harder.” *is trying to administer a sedative*
After that whole fiasco…
Marvel: “Hey, guys, I apprehended the villain. Where were you- why is Flash passed out on the floor.”
After they explained, seeing all their traumatized and scarred expressions, Marvel finally explained that in Fawcett, people couldn’t die. Not unless they wanted to anyways. When most Fawcitizens got hurt, they bounced back very similarly to Tom and Jerry. A wonderful demonstration of this conveniently happened when someone nearby just happened to run off a roof, hovered in the air for a solid fifteen seconds before looking down and then proceeding to fall. They then dug themselves out of the human shaped hole they left, dusted themselves off and walked off like nothing happened.
Safe to say, none of them wanted to come back to Fawcett after this. Though unfortunately, there are still times they have to visit.
Goon: *evil laughs and runs up to Batman and shoves a couple sticks of TNT into his hands*
Batman: *can’t safely throw it anywhere because of the civilians around so it blows up*
Goon: *pointing and laughing*
Batman: *standing there, somehow still alive and covered and soot. He blinks rapidly before grabbing his shark repellent and emptying the entire can on the goon’s face, eyes, and mouth*
As for why Bruce was so pressed to the point where he emptied an entire canister of shark repellent on the man? He could feel the soot everywhere. It somehow got under his mask so he feels it on every inch of skin near the upper part of his torso.
Don’t worry though, this chicanery happens to everyone else too. Like, every single Lantern that has entered Fawcett has taken a comically large hammer to head and has gotten a large bump as a result.
Marvel: *walking by when he does a double take seeing John* “Oh my Gods, what happened-”
GL(John Stewart): “I DON’T want to talk about it.”
Then there was the time Hawkgirl was chasing after a villain one time and they happened to get into Fawcett. She actually slipped on a conveniently placed banana peel. Then, the villain she was chasing stepped on a rake and got a good smack to the face.
Marvel: “Hawkgirl! What’re you doing here?” *flies down, happy to see his friend*
Hawkgirl: *gestures to the villain with a long red line down their face from the rake’s pole* “I was chasing them.”
Marvel: “Cool, cool, cool, uh… what happened to his face?”
Hawkgirl: “He stepped on a rake.”
*silence*
Hawkgirl: “Why do your people just have bananas and rakes laying around?”
Marvel: “What…?”
In conclusion, nobody besides the Fawcett heroes like being in Fawcett.
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octuscle · 2 days ago
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Model Job
Chester didn't know much about the modeling job he was hired for. He had been told to come in a blue suit. A neat hairstyle was required. The studio was a sober room in a functional office building in an industrial area. Nothing glamorous, but that wasn't what he was after. He was after money. Dirty money. He had a bunch of creditors breathing down his neck, and if he didn't want to be evicted from his apartment, which was way too expensive for him, he had to get this job.
The guys waiting in the casting room largely fit the current stereotype: bearded, tattooed, manly. Their hair was either super short or their long manes were tied back in topknots. But a few of the men looked just like Chester: well-groomed hair, clean-shaven, no visible tattoos. But in contrast to Chester, these men were usually rather petite, almost feminine. Chester was well-groomed, but clearly a real man. He prayed that this was the type of man they were looking for. Because then his competition would be very manageable. If they were looking for a guy with a mane and a full beard, however, he had no chance.
The waiting time was endless. The men spoke little to each other. Again and again, someone was called into the casting room, and mostly a disappointed or angry man came out. Chester was just happy that he had a charging cable for his cell phone with him. And that there was Wi-Fi. This way he could pass the time and did not have to rely on the goodwill of others to recharge his battery. After what felt like an eternity, someone called out, “Chester Cavendish?” It was unnecessary to call his name. Chester was the last to wait. But it was good to hear his name. His name was part of his capital. Not that he had anything to do with the Cavendish family, the Dukes of Devonshire. If he had their money, he wouldn't have to model. But the name sounded good. Respectable. Impressive. Hopefully it would help.
“Mr. Cavendish, if you would please stand in the spotlight over there.” Chester did as he was told. He had only been able to catch a glimpse of the panel that had to decide his fate. Now he looked into the spotlight and couldn't even guess what was happening behind it. ”Move naturally, Mr. Cavendish. As if you were waiting for your girlfriend in front of the hairdresser.” Chester took a few steps, turned around, paused, always careful to show the spotlight his best side.
“I don't know,” someone murmured. ‘He looks too much like old money to me. Too well-groomed, too upper class.’ ‘The problem is that we don't have anyone else.’ ”If he was a bit more relaxed. A bit more peppy.”
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“Okay, that's better. Brown shoes, five o'clock shadow...” ”I think so too, much better for our target group!”
Chester began to feel more comfortable. Apparently, his type was well received by the client. His type matched his name. Black sheep from a good family. Good background, but slightly rebellious appearance. “He looks a bit conformed.” ‘Yes, the hairstyle is not bad, but he could show a bit more skin.’ ”You said it, sex sells”
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Chester hadn't been sure whether it would be too intrusive to wear a sleeveless shirt... But it didn't seem to be a problem. He posed a bit more provocatively. And the muttering from the other side of the spotlight was obviously approving!
“I don't know about you, but it's too 90s for me. Too metrosexual.” ‘I agree.’ ‘And he could do with a bit more muscle too.’ ”Mr. Cavendish, how many times a week do you train?”
Chester wondered what difference it made how long it took him to get his muscles in shape. He was proud of his muscles. It was damn hard work, after all.
“Four or five times a week. But call me Chester. Mr. Cavendish was my father!”
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“Thank you, Chester. And it's impressive what you've achieved in the gym!”
Chester listened, but only understood fragments. “…a little bit...”, “…too well-behaved...”, “…bad boy...”. It was difficult for him to continue playing the waiting game.
“Chester, do you think your normal job and modeling go together? Or is that a problem for you?”
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“No problem! I still work a bit in my dad's construction company, dudes! He'll understand if I have to go on camera.”
Whispering again... And then, “Yes, he could indeed look more like a construction worker.”
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Chet was slowly beginning to lose interest. He wasn't a model, he was a handyman... But he also wanted to be an influencer. That's probably why he had to do this kind of shit.
“Sorry, Chester, I forgot. How often do you go to the gym?” “Name is Chet. Gym is like for wimps. I hav me fuckin' workout six days a week at the construction site. N' three times a week i go boxin'.”
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“I think we have the perfect candidate.” “I agree!” “But somehow he's not quite up to date yet, is he?” “Yeah, a few tattoos maybe.” “What do you think of blond hair?” ”Deal!”
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Chet was the epitome of the C-Class celebrity. We knew him from a few modeling jobs, we knew him as a fitness influencer, we knew him from trash reality soaps like Love Island. But just a little bit. He wasn't famous. But he made a lot of money. And for an airhead like him, that was quite a lot!
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revelboo · 1 day ago
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Do you have any plans to write for any mtmte villians? Pharma, tyrest, the djd, overlord etc? In the mtmte rodimus fic brainstorm mentiones that there might be humans outside of the lost light as well, so i wonder if that's how you plan to write those ones (assuming you will at some point) 🤔
I do. Two little guys and one rabid dog today
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L.G. Fuad
IDW Tarn x Reader
• “No,” he growls, trying to walk away from Nickel and that organic animal she has in her servos. Ignoring as best he can when she jogs after him. Megatron, give him strength to deal with this lunacy. Especially as she cuts him off and holds it up at arm’s length, it’s little head lolling forward. Out cold either from terror or the trauma of being caught by the Pet. And he knows exactly why Nickel had saved the thing, it’s even smaller than she is. “We have a pet, remember?”
• “But it’s cute and helpless. It needs us,” she protests. Helpless just means weak and weak things don’t survive. Don’t deserve to survive. Optics narrowing behind his mask, he vents tiredly. Wouldn’t it be better to leave it here to die or have let the Pet mauled it? It’s not like any of them know anything about organics, but staring down at Nickel, there’s no denying her. She’s asks for so little and does so much. Relenting, he kneels to prod at the thing with a servo and sensing victory, Nickel thrusts it into his hands. “Watch it for a second.” And she’s hurrying off leaving him with this small, pathetic thing warm in his servos.
• Wanting to demand she come back, because letting her keep this thing doesn’t mean he wants anything to do with it. But it shifts in his servos, a little hand bumping against his palm. And the skin is red and broken from the Pet. It’s honestly amazing there’s not more damage, almost like the Pet was playing not trying to kill it. Studying the little thing, it’s the similarities that nag at him, make him uncomfortable. Its little face is curiously almost Cybertronian. Similar body shape to a crude protoform, same number of fingers as his own servos. Just horribly, eerily soft and organic.
• Carrying it to a chair and sitting in the medbay, he uses the clawed tip of a servo to nudge its head. Like a Cybertronian, but not. A mockery really. Too weak and fragile to be anything like they are. Little bones under flesh that will snap with the slightest pressure. So why does he keep toying with it? Touching it to feel that strange soft give its skin has or the steady beat of its heart. It’s alien and ugly. Soft and warm. Not his problem at all and he needs to stress that to Nickel. This thing is her pet, not his. He doesn’t care if it lives or dies at all even as it curls into a ball against his servos and makes a soft, pained sound, forehead pressing against him.
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softness-and-shattering · 3 days ago
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Thank you, that makes a little more sense to me.
Its always that assumption that trans guys can access medical transition and then easily go stealth for the rest of their lives. Marriage would still be difficult, though obviously not being married was worse for women, but it was still a symbol of being a proper adult. And theres people nearly died from attempting at-home surgery. And there were those laws about how many clothing articles assigned to the 'opposite' gender one was allowed to wear and it was NOT safe if you were found out unless you were extremely lucky. And thats if the person was succeeding at stealthing at all. What about all the guys who never transitioned, who couldnt?
And like. So many of us have died young. Im sure some people did transition and get the hell out of dodge and disappear into obscurity.
This line is just bothering me "Transmasculinity pushes away feminized restrictions on labor; trans femininity is labor."
If a trans guy survives to a point where he can succeed at passing and at being stealth, yes he can skip out on the way womens labor is limited. (I assume thats what 'feminized restrictions' mean). Thats a pretty big if. Im sure it has happened, its just always the assumption that all trans guys achieve that and thats not true.
And then the second part, 'trans femininity is labor" I dont dispute, femininity is always labor even when its joyful. I also think 'passing' and certainly transitioning is also labor for everyone, those arent exclusive statements. It takes learning to stop shrinking yourself down to not take up space, changing ones voice without hormones, picking up mens mannerisms and how they speak, thats also labor. Figuring out clothing especially if ones body isnt the 'correct' shape and size.
But yeah this is also isnt necessaroly fact, its an analysis based on what the writers could find in I assume our written history. At which Im also not an expert and have a lot to learn still. Im sure it would also help to read the whole of the quoted texts but I dont have spoons for that.
Thanks again :)
wait where are all the trans guys
Historical-anthropological research, especially the work taking place before the 21st century or outside the West, tends to focus entirely on transfeminized groups. So when reading these works it’s pretty natural to ask — wait, where are all the trans guys? This is a reasonable question with a few clear answers; this post is something quick I can point people to.
The central condition of transfeminized groups' absorption into feminist activism has been to accept a kind of symmetry with select TME groups through the understanding of trans femininity as "gender variance." Under this framework, transfeminized groups' social position can be understood as a consequence of gender variance and some abstract violation of cis norms; this was proposed by people like Susan Stryker and Emi Koyama [1], among others, and continues to structure trans inclusion today. It also fails when considering several basic aspects of these groups:
Transfeminized groups are associated with hyperspecific labor practices, most frequently sex work, but also hair styling, drag, makeup artistry, acting, and other forms of 'gender work.'
Metropolitan transfeminized groups appear in the archive as highly clustered and active groups connected with, but usually intensely split from, the masculine men they fucked.
Transfeminized groups become a kind of 'third gender' on an epistemic level; they are Known to wider society before and after “coming out” in a way that USAmerican transmasculinity has only recently vaguely approached.
Transfeminized groups are heavily clustered in labor practice, social organization, and epistemic position, although this is not universal -- certain strains of USAmerican transfemininity have become a bit more labor-agnostic in the last two decades, not-so-coincidentally alongside more general currents of gender-labor liberation. The messy strains of trans male identity recovered from the archive and from current practice tend to lack labor, social, and epistemic coherence. As Aaron Devor notes in FTM, his 1997 history of FTM men, trans men in the 20th century tended to transition out of cities and into the countryside, finding low-profile places they could exist in. These practices, and the earlier "female husband" practices described by Jen Manion, relied on the labor-agnostic nature of transitioned manhood in order to disappear from public life. Transfeminized groups, on the other hand, are categorically restricted from the main form of economic life historically available to women -- marriage. Their labor practices are heavily constrained and have almost always revolved around some form of 'gender work:' as Susan Stryker put it, you need to get people to pay you for being a trans woman. Transmasculinity pushes away feminized restrictions on labor; trans femininity is labor.
Because transfeminized identities are so often labor-identities, and because their specific brand of 'gender work' and hormonal/silicone/surgical embodiment usually requires both specialized training and community support, nearly every metropolitan center in the world developed highly centralized transfeminized groups over the course of the 20th century [2]. As Ochoa notes, this visibility is partially due to epistemic visibility (everyone knows what a trans is), partially due to group structure (people work and train each other), and partially due to the selectively visible demands of finding clients. Fledglings come in with a way of being that is always already visible to society, but changing the body to match and learning how to fully enact and slowly contest the third-gender labor-identity they've been given takes a lot of community support.
So as labor-identities, transfeminized groups tend to a level of labor/community/epistemic coherence that has no clear counterpart. The news archives we have of trans men (as seen in Manion) position them as singular and easily absorbed back into the female gestalt; the cisgender feminist/gayguy/AIDS researchers that form the bulk of historical-anthropological work saw them as unnecessary to their grand theories of gender; the communities themselves have been materially fractured and, for the groups that rise out of lesbian-feminist activism, only partially committed to their own existence. The result of all this is that there is no clear equivalent to the "transfeminized groups" of Jules-Gill Peterson; there is no symmetry to trannydom, and while additional work to unearth trans manhood in the archive remains extremely valuable, sometimes the necessary level of label-coherence and social existence just isn't there.
[1] Stryker, "My Words to Victor Frankenstein Above the Village of Chamounix: Performing Transgender Rage," Emi Koyama, "The Transfeminist Manifesto" [2] As seen in Namaste, Invisible Lives, Prieur, "Mema's House, Mexico City," Kulick, "Travesti," Newton, "Mother Camp," Ochoa, "Queen for a Day," Hegarty, "The Made-Up State," and plenty more. Most of these works came out in the late 80s and 90s due to a combination of the feminist "third gender" craze, the burgeoning field of masculinity studies, and AIDS.
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caelivir · 2 days ago
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hold me down | oliver aiku
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synopsis. oliver’s always been different with you. he doesn’t figure out why until tonight.
pairing. oliver aiku x fem!reader | wc. 1.8k | genres. established relationship + fluff + pet names (princess & doll) | warnings. only a little suggestive cuz is it really an aiku fic if it isn’t?
notes. ooc oli because he would never in a million years do this but im just a girl and i have dreams okay. also a little late on this but thank you for 500 followers. i love love love you guys so much.
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when oliver comes home, he’s burnt out. the combination of a workout with the athletic trainers and an afternoon practice back-to-back had drained the life out of his muscles. he makes a note to never do one after the other ever again.
oliver sets his duffel bag by the side of the living room couch. he lets his weight fall back on the cream colored cushions. he takes a moment to stare up at the plain ceiling before his eyes flutter shut.
he ascertains that he wasn’t asleep for long when a gentle shake at his thigh slowly yanks him from his state of slumber. his mind is still groggy, yet oliver can already confidently guess who would dare to wake him just by the shape of the hand on his thigh. it's the only other person he gave a copy of his apartment key to. he doesn't question why you're here. he's used to you coming over to stay a few nights.
“you okay, oli?” you ask, hints of worry laced in your pretty voice.
“mhm.” oliver hums. he picks his head up. "no need to worry about me, princess."
you’re fresh out the shower. he realizes this after he picks up on the addicting scent of your coconut and vanilla bodywash that you keep stashed in his bathroom; he senses that there's something else mixed in with it too. he recognizes it to be hints of orris and cedarwood, a combo that he finds on his own clothes. his eyes travel and the sight of you in his shirt nearly makes him pounce on you. he doesn't have the energy for that though, so he opts for reaching out for your hand.
"are you sure? i only woke you 'cause i didn't want you sleeping on the couch. do you want to move to the bed?" you gently squeeze oliver's fingers. "i'll clean out your practice bag too if you want."
"no."
"no?" you chuckle in bewilderment at your boyfriend's sleepy defiance. oliver weakly pats his thighs. you bring your eyebrows together in thought.
your eyes had widened ever so slightly, and he knew you just figured out what he wants. you shake your head. "we don't have to today. you're tired."
"mmm, don't care." oliver denies your refusal and pats his thighs once more. he sees you sigh, the falling of your chest pushes the air out of your lungs, but a soft grin replaces it instantly because who are you to defy him?
you approach oliver, hiking up one leg to come down on one side of his body with the other following immediately after, settling your weight on his lap. your arms drape over his shoulders.
he squeezes your hips before asking the signature question. "how was your day, doll?"
"let me think." you play with the green tips of hair at the back of oliver's neck as you rack your brain for interesting moments to share with him.
oliver isn’t sure how this habit started, but he couldn't be bothered to determine the exact details of its beginnings. all that he’s certain of is the fact that this little routine you’ve developed with him is the best part of his day.
he adores the feeling that comes with your entire weight resting on top of him. he loves being able to take in every detail of your beautiful face up close. he’s addicted to your voice and the stories that you inject into his veins.
he'll admit, some days it’s not even about hearing about your day, some days oliver would use this established routine as an excuse to get touchy with you. his hands would wander down to your ass and you'd throw glares at him. your narrowed eyes would only egg him on more. in response, he’d sit up straighter to kiss your neck, sucking and nibbling at that one sweet spot that makes you scratch at his back. you’d lose track of your story, trading details in for stutters.
you'd say that it’s sly and underhanded. you'd chastise him for not listening, but some days you’re just as unfair. oliver could be in the middle of sharing his recollection of the photoshoot he had earlier in the day when you decide to sneak your hands under his shirt. you’d play dumb as he shivers beneath you, your doe eyes encouraging him to continue. he’d try to carry on with his story, but all he would be able to focus on is your palms running up and down his abs. you'd nod your head as he speaks, there’d be a twinkle in your eye that lets him know that you’re fully aware that he’s on the verge of snapping and taking you right there.
other days no words are exchanged at all. oliver can read your mind just by having your mouth on his. he can tell just by the way you tug on his hair and whine against his lips that you badly missed him.
and sometimes oliver isn't able to be there with you at all. he deems those days to be the worst. they're reduced to facetimes where you try to hide your pretty face from him. the calls lag and crash because some days he's halfway across the country or on an entirely different continent.
today doesn’t fall into either of those categories, and he's most definitely thankful that it isn't the last. today, oliver is solely focused on hearing from you. he lets your rambles take root in his bones. he studies you as you talk. the lights in your eyes rival the stars. the smile on your face as you recall the dog you saw at the park could kill a thousand men. the fire of your touch could set the world ablaze.
oliver is well-aware that he's not worthy to be graced with such beautiful sights. he's no saint. his past is stained with his unfaithfulness and his trail of many relationships. he isn't sure why you gave him a chance despite knowing what he's done. you had said that at least he was being honest about it, but that had only left him with more questions than answers. shouldn't that make you more put off about dating him?
he chooses to ignore it; he shoves the question deep into the corners of his head until it's practically invisible. instead on picking apart that question, he focused on you.
throughout your ongoing relationship, he's put thought into your dates, making sure that they're never exactly the same. he spoils you rotten but not with lavish gifts. the one time he did you were severely unhappy at his thoughtless spending, and thus he made a note in his mental archive to reserve such actions only for your birthday (and anniversaries). instead, he ties your shoe laces for you and he fixes your jewelry. he kisses away your tears when you cry and learns the recipes to your favorite meals. he sits you up on the surface of the sink in his bathroom and brushes your teeth for you when you're too tired to do it yourself. he lets you drag him into doing skincare and makeup because it gives him an excuse to admire how cute you look when you're focused, and he gets to relish in the feeling of your hands brushing against his face.
it was baffling. when oliver first started realizing how much he does for you, he felt like an alien had possessed his body. there was something that had latched itself onto the controls of his brain. that had to be the reason why he was acting so out of character. when he told this to itoshi sae, he was called a fucking idiot and a loser, and looking back, he probably was. the answer, the explanation for his new behavior was in front of him the entire time.
it's simply because-
"i love you." oliver utters out loud. your hands freeze in his hair. whatever you were saying previously dies on your tongue.
"huh?"
oliver blinks slowly. the words had slipped out unintentionally; the gravity of them crush him suddenly. the aftertaste of them is foreign, like they were never supposed to be spoken from him. it's new territory. it's the first time oliver's said that to you in the four months you've been together. it's the first time he's said that to anyone for that matter.
he contemplates taking it back, as if he could ever extract the words from the air and shove them back down his throat. but why bother with jumping through those loops? he has no good reason to take it back. he has no use spinning a truth into a lie. so instead, oliver offers you an upturn of his lips, his heart threatening to break out of his chest. he soaks in all of your microexpressions. your mouth is stuck in a cycle of opening and closing, your eyebrows drawn together in disbelief.
"idiot." you mutter shakily, gnawing at your quivering lip. you bury your face in the crevice of oliver's neck. it makes him smile. he knows your tells. you're about to start crying. "do you know how long i waited for you to say that?"
oliver pulls you in closer, wrapping his buff arms around your waist. "i know." he acknowledges. "i'm sorry it took me so long to realize it."
you tug hardly on his hair to get back at him. the pain spreads to his scalp, and he can't find it in him to be mad. "damn princess." he chuckles.
you remove your head from its hiding place. both of your hands slide so that they rest on either side of oliver's neck. in the light, he can catch the path of tears that fell from your eyes. "yeah, well, you deserved it."
"i know."
"i love you." you breathe out desperately. the four words that have been boiling inside you, the four words you've managed to cage up finally rush out and crash down like waves.
"yeah?" oliver smirks. you lean in closer, and he gives your waist a quick squeeze.
"yeah. i love you so much." you whisper in front of oliver's lips before he closes the inch gap between you two.
usually, when oliver kisses you, he's does so as if he's a starved man; he wants to devour you whole. this is nothing like that. he substitutes his hunger for softness. his lips are gentle against yours as if to prove himself to you. he wants you, with every fiber in his being, to believe that his words are true. his 'i love you's' are real and honest and come from the deepest parts of his heart. when you pull away, you both look at each other as if your each other's entire world.
"i love you, princess." oliver says. the words are still unfamiliar on his tongue, but he thinks he can get used to them. he'll say them as many times as he needs to if it meant that he can see that blinding smile on your face.
oliver aiku is no saint, but he'll do anything for you.
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drizzledrawings · 7 hours ago
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CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT HOW JAYCE DID NOT BAT AN EYE, A SINGLE EYELASH, ABOUT VIKTORS AUGMENTATIONS????? EITHER TIME?????????????? like the fact that viktor wakes up from his goop coma and is like "holy fuck dude im like for sure not entirely human wtf am i rn?????" AND JAYCES IMMEDIATE RESPONSE IS "omg ur alive and ily" IS WILD HOW? ARE PEOPLE STILL DENYING THAT THERE IS LOVE THERE??????????? like im screaming about the finale but IVE BEEN SCREAMING SINCE ACT ONE WTF
No like he is so chill with it he simply doesn't care, all he wanted was for Viktor to still be breathing, to be alive. he sees his purple naked body and does not care, he just hugs him, and wraps him up in a blanket. he was sleeping in the lab where he was healing Viktor even though he was visually injured
he cries when he sees him after the explosion, he rushes to save him, first thing, and spares no thought to anything or anyone else.
He gets MAD at Mel for only saving him that day when he stands in the room where it happened. He still cares so much about Viktor even though he is trying to put an end to what he's doing. He fully believes it's not him. He STILL loves him
Anyways, hhhhhhhh, they're soulmates across all possibilities, and their relationship goes beyond romance and platonic love. They are destined to be together in every possibility. Their relationship is simply not a brothership. I'm sorrrrryyy.
I know I'm rambling so much, but LIKE! One guy doesn't dictate their relationship. An entire team worked on the show. Different writers, animators, and actors shaped them—many of whom support this!
I'm ill
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burrowdarling · 3 days ago
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Take It Easy
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Summary: With everything that's gone on this season, you decided Joe deserved some much needed time away.
Pairings: Joe Burrow x gf!reader
Warnings: implied smut minors DNI
Note: Hi! I was finally able to get around to the request from this anon. I hope you enjoy it! Some good ole bye-week comfort with some steam.
Word Count: 2k
Check out my Masterlist here!
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It had taken quite a fair bit of convincing, but you were all packed up heading a few hours away to a cabin with a couple other guys from the team and their significant others. Joe was beside you in the driver's seat, making you passenger with Sam and Jess passed out in the back. Evan and Gracie were in another car about 15 minutes ahead. Your trunk was filled with all of the supplies you could possibly need for the weekend with a few more hours on the road ahead of you. 
After how you’d seen Joe beat himself up this past week, you knew you had to do something to take his mind off of things. A trip like this has been something you’d wanted to do for a bit, but the bye week felt like the right time to get everyone rest for the remainder of the season. Joe was reluctant at first, still heading to the facility at the start of the bye week, head strong and adamant that he needed to be doing everything he could to get the team in shape. You’d had to talk him through things, getting him to understand that his body needed a break and having a few of the guys could help him to talk to other people who would get it. He’d only agreed to a few days, but you still took that as a win in your book. 
You knew he was trying so hard, carrying so much weight of the team on his shoulders. It was a burden he could only hold alone for so long before it did him in. Joe didn’t relax much during any typical season, but this felt like a special exception to his strict routine. You were trying to drill into him that rest was just as productive and all of the other components he prides himself on.
Joe was lightly drumming along to the beat of the song softly playing from the speakers, your music left on shuffle from earlier in the drive. You were excited to get away with everyone, knowing the guys needed a break during the bye week and what better way to spend it than up in mountains unplugged for a few days. His right hand found its way to your thigh, light stroking you out of your thoughts. 
“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” Joe asked, glancing in your direction. He looked so soft like this, wearing a hoodie and sweats with his hair down. His expression was calm, any signs of stress that had been showing on his face weren’t currently evident. You hadn't gotten to see him like this much recently, taking him in while you had the chance. 
“I was just thinking about how nice this trip is going to be. I’m really glad you agreed to go, I wanted to be able to do something nice for you and figured this was a perfect time to go”.
Joe sighed, humming constantly as his hand gently squeezed your thigh three times. It was a signal you both can come up with during your early days of dating, a nonverbal way to say ‘I love you’ and a simple reminder you were there for that person. The gesture brought a small smile to your face.
“I’m glad we invited some of the guys, but I can’t wait until I can get you alone” Joe spoke, keeping his voice low in case anyone had woken up. His voice held a rasp and desire that would cause you to fold right there in any other circumstance.
You felt Joe's hand begin to climb your thigh, sliding closure to the apex of your thighs. You placed your hand on top of his, applying a bit of pressure to halt his movements.  
“Slow your roll cowboy, we're not even there yet” you spoke chuckling.
“Cowboy? I’d gladly save a horse and let you ride me any day” Joe said with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows. He looked over at you, tipping his nonexistent hat to really seal the deal. You couldn’t help, but laugh at his antics. Joe
You lightly patted him on the shoulder, rolling your eyes in his direction with a smile on your face “yeah, yeah focus on the road so we get there in one piece”. 
“Yes ma’am” he said with a short nod, turning his attention back to the road ahead.
By the time you had arrived, it had gotten late and you all were ready to get everything in and turn in for the night. You tried to do everything as efficiently as possible, creating a system of the guys bringing everything while you and the girls got it all sorted out inside. Once the last thing was brought in, the guys began to explore the place you had booked. You tried to keep as much of it as a surprise for Joe as you could, keeping the details limited.
The cabin itself was nice, a cozy feel hitting you immediately. There were plenty of bedrooms for everyone, a pool table in the living room, finished with a fireplace. There would be plenty of room in the kitchen to cook for the weekend, opting to stay in as much as possible to really unwind. Downstairs there was a small room that led out to a patio hosting a hot tub, the main thing that had really sold you on this place specifically. You could tell by the vibe it was going to be a nice few days getaway with each other even if you weren’t completely alone. 
You and the girls got to cooking, the guys finding enjoyment out of the pool table. You could feel yourself getting lost in your thoughts again as your eyes fell on Joe, leaning against the table laughing and joking around with his friends. When it was his turn to play, he bent over and steadied the pool stick expertly between his fingers. Joe’s hands were always something that you had found attractive and this instance was no exception. You knew exactly what those hands were capable of, causing a shiver of desire to run down your spine. The look of focus on his face completed the narrative you were writing in your mind, making your thoughts not so innocent. 
You were snapped out of it by a bump to the hip by Gracie, coming back into the moment and food you were preparing in front of you. A knowing look had crossed her face followed by a wink as she went back to what she was doing.
“It’s good to see him with a smile on his face again” Jess said, you nodded in agreement. Joe’s happiness was contagious, leaving you to finish your cooking with a wide smile on your face.
Everyone finished up dinner, deciding to head to bed and be ready for the day ahead. 
“I really wanna go enjoy that hot tub before bed, we had such a long drive and it’d be nice to unwind just the two of us” 
“I’d like that, I also brought that one suit you really like” you said with a mischievous grin plastered across your face and you made your way down the hall to your room.
“The red one?” Joe called after you, sounding eager.
“You’ll just have to wait and see Burrow” you said, tossing his suit out and closing the door behind you.
By the time you made your way down to the hot tub, Joe was already there getting everything set. You stepped out onto the patio, the sounds of the door closing alerting Joe to your presence. Joe let out a low whistle at the sight of you, letting his eyes rake up and down your barely covered body.
“You’re absolutely breathtaking sweetheart” Joe said, extending his hand to help you get into the hot tub. 
“Thank you babe, you know I had to bring your favorite” you told him, stepping into the hot tub and letting out a moan at the sensation of hot water and got comfortable.
Joe got in after, settling on the opposite side of the tub and letting his shoulders drop at the feeling of hot water relaxing the tension in his muscles. He let his eyes close, fully submitting himself to relaxation, a groan escaping his lips. The sounds he was making had you clenching your thighs together, still feeling worked up from earlier. You loved seeing Joe when he got worked up, but you also loved these moments when he was able to be unguarded with you. 
“C’mere, I feel like you’re so far away from me” Joe said, lifting his arms out of the water to gesture you over.
You swam over next to him, gently pushing his shoulders to turn him to the side and settled your hands onto his shoulders. You began massaging his muscles, leaving tender kisses across the top of his back, hearing the soft sigh escape his lips.
“I know I don’t tell you enough, but I appreciate all that you do for me. You're my biggest supporter in my corner and I want you to know how loved you are. I know I don’t always show it ” Joe said quietly.
“Of course Joey, loving you is the easiest thing I have ever done. Watching you get to do what you love for a living every week is one of my favorite things. You go out on that field and put your entire soul into it. I know you’re doing everything you can Joey and I know everything will work out eventually” you said, hoping he would take on some of the confidence in your words.
Joe wordlessly spun you around to face him, lifting you onto his lap. His hands fell to your ass, giving it a gentle squeeze while your arms settled around his neck, your lips connecting in a passionate kiss. 
“I really don’t know what I'd do without you sweetheart. You’re my rock, my safe place, there’s no one else I’d rather come home to every night” Joe said, his lips finding your neck trailing kisses down to your collarbone. 
“I’m right there with you, Joey, you have no idea” your words trailing off as he continued his assault with his mouth, biting and sucking your throat to the possibility of leaving marks.
He used the leverage to ground you into his lap, feeling his growing erection beneath you. A gasp caught in your throat, Joe taking the opportunity to let his tongue find its way into your mouth, fighting for dominance.
“That feel good, baby? I want you to feel just what you do to me "Joe groaned out, eliciting a whimper from you.
This was the sweet friction you’d been craving from him all night, letting your head fall back as pleasure overtook you. This only spurred Joe on more, watching how he was able to make you feel as good as you were. Seeing you fall deeper into your desire only made Joe grind harder against your clothed center. It was getting harder and harder for him to control himself, his patience thinning. You brought your head back up, leaning in letting your lips ghosting over his ear as you spoke.
“I’ve been craving you all night Joey, i want you so badly” you lightly whined, nipping at his lobe.
Joe reacted as quick as he could, scooping you into his arms as he carried you out of the hot tub and into the house. You broke out into a fit of giggles at his movements, careful to keep your volume down for your housemates. The remainder of your night would be spent relaxing in a different way.
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zorosangell · 1 day ago
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⛥゚・。 onigiri
synopsis: zoro's on a training binge and refuses to bathe... that is, unlesss its with you (let's be real he would absolutely do this shit)
cw: nsfw (implied), lots and lots of comfort, zoro's a little emotionally constipated, you and nami are besties, he really does love you a whole lot, etc.
a/n: just wanted to let you guys know that both this and piña colada are filler chapters in protector. i haven't posted all the chapters on here but if you wanna read it on wattpad then heres the link: PROTECTOR--wattpad
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"(y/n)! You have to save us! I can't take it anymore!" Nami exclaimed, bursting into the kitchen with a dramatic flourish. 
You paused mid-shaping, looking up from your rice ball and raising a brow.
"Nami? What's up?" you asked, confused, and a little concerned. "Is everything alright?"
"No... it's not..." she sniffled, walking up to the bar and taking a seat before slumping herself over the counter. "And it's all Zoro's fault..."
With a small smile, you quelled your original worries, allowing your shoulders to sink and your hands to return to their work.
"What'd he do this time?" you chuckled, carefully kneading the rice in your hands, molding it into a triangle. "Leave his sweaty towels on the ground again?"
"Worse..."
"Shook the deck by dropping one of his heavy weights?"
"Even worse..."
You hummed with thought, doing your best to recall the worst of your swordsman's many transgressions against your navigator.
"Ate the tangerines off one of your trees without asking?"
"Somehow even worse than that..."
You gave up with a laugh, unable to come up with anything else.
"I fold," you smiled, patting a thick piece of seaweed onto the rice ball. "What'd he do?"
"It's this stupid training binge!" Nami groaned, lifting her head from the counter. "He's been working out in the crow's nest for six days straight! And he's starting to stink up the ship!"
Frustrated, she slammed her fist on the wood, her grip tightening with hilarious fury.
"I tried to go up there and get him to bathe, but he completely blew me off!"
With a huff, her gaze lifted to you, and almost immediately softened, curbing her anger if only by a hair.
"You know this warrior-training nonsense better than I do... so could you please talk him into washing his ass? Pretty please!" she pleaded, clasping her hands together and  throwing on her best puppy dog face. "At this rate, he's gonna fumigate the whole Sunny..."
With a soft grin, you nodded, placing your finished onigiri on a plate with the rest of them.
"I got it covered," you assured, picking up the plate and walking out from behind the counter. "Don't worry about the thing."
"Thank you, (y/n)!" she cheesed, jumping up from her seat and throwing her arms around your neck, pulling you into a tight hug. "Have I ever told you how much I love ya?"
You chuckled, using your free-hand to return it happily.
Your best friend never failed to make you smile.
"I don't think you'd ever let me forget."
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"Zoro? You still in here?" you called, peeking your head into the crow's nest, the rhythmic shink of his weights letting you know he was, indeed, still in here.
Though, before you could hear a response, you were bombarded by a smell that could only come from a man immersed in his work.
'Or immersed in his musk...'
Fighting off the urge to scrunch your nose, you walked further into the room, the shadows giving way and revealing the man of the hour in all his sweaty glory, toiling away with a freakishly large and heavy weight.
"5566... 5567... 5568... 5569... 5570..."
You watched quietly, with both awe and intrigue, as he swung the weight around with perfect control, almost as if it was a training sword.
His back muscles rippled and twitched with each minute movement, stretching and flexing to accommodate the weight's large size, the veins in his forearms and neck bulging with concentration.
Not to mention his grunts of effort, which were awfully similar to how he sounded when he—
"Y'need somethin', (y/n)?" Zoro asked, ripping you from your thoughts, while still keeping up his cadence and count. 
A tinge of warmth settled on your cheeks, having been caught, but you quickly shoved it away, focusing on the task at hand.
"You've been at this for a while, Zo'," you started, flying into the air and toward one of the even larger weights that sat across from him, taking a seat. "I think it's time you took a break."
"Can't," he grunted out, his swing in perfect sync. "I gotta get to ten-thousand... Then I've got a high intensity leg circuit... before I switch over to core."
'Gods...'
To, quite literally, anyone else, this workout would kill them.
"But it's almost midnight. And from what I've seen, you've only slept for two hours in the past week," you added, concerned.
"That's part of my training," he huffed, grinding out his 5863rd swing. "On the battlefield... I won't be well rested... gotta make sure I can still be at top form in this state..."
You sighed, jumping down and landing next to him.
You should've known this was gonna be a struggle.
"That, I understand... but the least you can do is take the rest of the night off. You can always start back up in the morning," you tried again, a little firmer. "Besides, you smell... over-worked."
But he, yet again, denied, this time saying nothing at all, the shink-shink of his weight filling the silence.
You huffed, cheeks puffing with frustration.
'Looks like I'll have to pull out the big guns...'
Slyly, you rested your hand on his shoulder, his movement halting and flesh tensing under your touch.
"C'mon, Zo'... just one little bath?" you pleaded, your voice lowering to a sultry tone, one you knew made him agree to almost anything. "I promise I'll do all the work... you won't have to lift a finger."
Looking at your face, Zoro couldn't help the sudden extra beat to his heart, as it was something he became accustomed to while being in your presence. 
He didn't understand why his knees felt weak when you talked to him like that, or why the tension in his shoulder was magically relieved by your touch.
But what he did understand was that he now had the sudden urge to sit down.
'Dammit...'
You were dangerous.
With an "annoyed" groan, he caved, dropping his weight and allowing you to take his hand, leading him toward the exit of the crow's nest with a giddy smile.
And though he tried to mask it, he couldn't help but be infected by your warmth, the feeling so potent that he had to physically bite back his smirk.
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"How's the water?" you asked, picking Zoro's discarded clothes off the ground and tossing them in the hamper as he sank into the large bath.
He let out a heavy sigh, allowing his eye to softly drift shut, "Amazing," he admitted, resting his arms on the tub's rim. "Nice 'n' hot, how I like it."
Internally, you pumped your fist in victory, covering your tracks by turning your back to lay out one of his towels.
With a grin, you grabbed the plate you'd rested on a nearby table, "Y'hungry? I made some onigiri."
He glanced at you with a slightly widened eye, pleasantly surprised.
He forgot you could cook.
Before Sanji joined up, you were the one who cooked for the crew, grilling, frying, and sauteing whatever the guys could catch.
And from what the swordsman could remember, it was pretty damn good, but he hadn't had your cooking since Water 7.
"I figured you would need a little pick me up after all that training, so I stuffed 'em full of sea king meat."
Tentatively, he took one off the plate, staring at it as if it was some sort of alien thing.
You combined his two favorite foods...
You knew his two favorite foods...
"You didn't have to do all this..." he stated, glancing up at you.
"No shit," you lightly chuckled, taking a seat on the ledge. "I know I didn't have to. I wanted to."
Sending a feather, you snatched the shampoo from the bathroom counter, bringing it back to you.
"You've been working hard... so I figured you deserved something nice."
Just as you were about to squeeze some into your hand, Zoro realized you still had your clothes on, and was suddenly confused.
"You're not getting in?" he asked, muffled by the delicious, stress-melting food in his mouth.
You paused, turning to him with a raised brow, "Did you want me to?"
And without an ounce of hesitation—
"Yes."
Your chest buzzed at his quick answer, and you gave him a warm smile before standing up and turning around, pulling off your shirt and tugging down your shorts.
And with your back turned, Zoro allowed himself to gawk freely, eyes greedily taking in the soft curves of your body as they were revealed to him.
Your hair swished past your hip as you bent over to pull your shorts off your ankles, giving him a perfect view of the globe of your ass, along with a tiny peek at your core.
'Goddamn...'
How he was going to keep it together, he had no clue.
"Alright," you sighed, carefully stepping into the water before situating yourself back on the ledge, squeezing some shampoo into your hand. "Gimme your head."
Smoothly, he moved over to sit between your legs, facing the wall as your fingers carded through his hair, massaging his scalp in a way he never thought possible.
It felt like heaven.
You let out a small chuckle as his head practically fell into your lap, heart nearly melting as his eye slid shut with a content hum.
'Adorable...'
With that as motivation, you pulled out all the stops, raking your nails through his hair, using your thumbs to massage the pressure points behind his ears, peppering kisses along his hairline.
The whole nine.
At one point, you were almost completely positive he fell asleep.
When you finished, you used a pitcher to carefully rinse the suds out, making sure all the shampoo was gone before finally sliding into the tub yourself.
But before you could do anything else, Zoro quickly grabbed your hips, carefully pulling you into his lap.
He didn't say anything, but his eyes made it perfectly clear what he wanted you to do.
And, of course, you obliged, grabbing a sponge and softly gliding it across his chest, pressing kisses on his bruises, your power healing them away.
You went on like this across his entire body, diligent in making sure you didn't miss a single one, completely oblivious to the look he was giving you, or the feeling in his chest.
It was as if you were hanging the stars in the sky right before his eyes.
The man wasn't used to so much love and affection all at once, and he was beginning to realize that he'd barely shown you any.
His heart and his head began feeling as heavy as lead, guilt digging into his chest at the revelation.
 The last thing he wanted was for you to think he didn't care about you, because, in all actuality, it was the complete opposite.
"You alright, Zo'?" you asked, tenderly cupping his cheek in your hand, brows furrowed in concern at his sudden shift in expression. "You want me to stop?"
"No," he firmly assured, adjusting his grip on your waist and abruptly hiking you up higher on his lap.
You let out a small yelp of surprise at the sudden movement, though your attention was quickly stolen by the man staring up at you, his eyes swimming with hesitation and uncertainty.
Smoothly, one of his hands slid up to the small of your back, his thumb drawing small, anxious circles on your flesh.
"I..." he paused, taking a few more seconds to gather his thoughts. "I'm not good at this..."
Your face fell almost instantly, confused, "What are you talking about?"
"This," he clarified, glancing at the bath, shampoo, and empty plate. "Gestures... romance... it's not exactly my thing."
He let out a sigh, the sound, along with his expression, making it clear that we was beating himself up over the matter.
"But I want to try... for you..."
A warm smile settled on your lips, his honesty both incredibly appreciated and incredibly admirable.
His communication skills had come a long way.
"Can't promise I'll be as mushy as Curly Brow... or the gentlemen Nami thinks I should be—"
"You wouldn't be you if you were," you assured with a grin, resting your hands on his chest. "If I wanted a mushy, gentle guy, I'd pick up any guy on the street. And you, Zoro, are not any guy on the street."
You let out a small chuckle, resting your forehead on his.
"Besides, I like my guys a little rough."
"Oh, do you, now?" he smirked, teasingly, his hand coming around to cup the back of your neck, pulling you close.
You let out a happy squeal as he pressed his lips against yours, your body melting into him instantly.
As you relished the feeling of his strong hands gliding against your skin, you kissed him back, using your position on his lap to get the angle on him and further deepening the kiss.
Both of you were outpouring gallons upon gallons of emotion, the atmosphere so heavy and passionate that as far as you both were concerned, there was no one but the two of you on the ship.
Though, to Sanji's severe disappointment, and Nami's severe annoyance, it was not just you two on the ship.
You and Zoro's little After-Bath "party" in the bathroom was heard by everyone on the crew (except for Chopper, thankfully), and marked the last time Nami ever asked you to make Zoro take a bath. 
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quantum1mmortality · 2 days ago
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oooooo I have so many ideas…
If you have a kid with curly, how does he react as a father? He gives me SUCH STRONG girl dad energy and I can’t tell you why. This man is a GIRL DAD. How is he as a parent? Does he cook? Can he help his kid with math homework? Is he a family man? I’m so curious to see your thoughts on this.
Prob like the 7th request I've gotten for dad/dilf Curly 😭😭 also to my very special anon who has been in my asks for a very special Jimmy request, give me a few days, it'll be out love 🪽(I'm busy asf rn)
Tw/cw; none!! All sfw this time :) see guys I can be family friendly when I want to be
Not proofread
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I've actually gone over this in the tags of a different post, I do think Curly would be a girl dad. He'd want twin girls and you guys canNOT tell me different.
After you come home from the hospital, Curly would do literally everything for you and the new babies. He'd prepare healthy meals for you, he'd help clean and feed the babies, if one of them started crying in the middle of the night he'd insist on being the one to take care of it, etc.
Basically the bare minimum but is still praised because the bare minimum is hard to come by now.
I see Curly as the type of man to be raised by a single mom and having no father figure. Morbid? A bit, but it helped shape him into the super awesome sauce girl dad he is today.
Because of having an absent father, Curly would go above and beyond to make sure he's present in his children's lives. Any days he has off, he's spending time with you and your new baby girls. Oh, his daughter's are in a school play? He's calling off work and showing up with flowers and chocolates for both of them. Shit like that
Curly would come into work late or just take the day off completely if you needed extra help with the kids. He'd leave work early to pick them up from school if you couldn't. He WANTS to be there. And just remember guys, if he wanted to, he would.
Curly would also try to be home early so he could read them bedtime stories. Idk I just think that's cute.
Once they start growing up, he's getting more into their interests. Curly would be the type of dad to let his daughters put makeup on him and have them do his nails. He would happily walk into pony express as a well known captain and have nail polish everywhere on his hands BUT his nails.
And yes, he would help his kids with their homework. Something about Curly makes me think he took mathematics in college, and I can safely say he is breaking every generational curse by not making your children cry over their math homework.
BONUS CONTENT!!!; Curly would want older twin daughters (obviously, we just went over that) and a younger boy. He would want to name the boy Dallas, but I can't think of any names for the girls. He'd like the name Phoebe a lot, so probably that and maybe a name like Sophia for the other twin.
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A/N; too many curly fics, must make master list
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rootspiral · 3 days ago
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Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 4 part 7
(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])
(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1])
THIS IS THE LAST EPISODE 4 ENTRY I SWEAR
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agatha: why yes I'm listening politely because I'm being sociable, not because this story concerns me in any way shape or form
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she did NOT want TO DO IT AGATHA. HE WAS HER SON TOO AGATHA. did you ever give her a chance to SAY any of THAT. damn rio is (metaphorically) fighting for her life here. waiting centuries to catch her wife with her guard down next to a random fire, and then reworking her LONG PLANNED SPEECH into bite sized easily digestible bits so that her emotionally stunted soulmate doesn't run away screaming
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I was doing MY DAMN FUCKING JOB agatha
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agatha looks away like whooops! wasn't listening! wasn't looking at you! no sir, not me!
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that's right. acknowledge her feelings. show her that you understand but that you're hurting too. be mature. you're doing great. god the way she swallows and stares right ahead, so determined. this is such a crucial moment for her.
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agatha: i'm stone cold. I'm a wall. this is not affecting me in the slightest. I'm bored, really.
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lilia not missing a word of what rio's saying
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lmao the neutral pronoun lasted two seconds. she's not even trying to pretend like she isn't talking about agatha. and the way she nods to herself like yes, I did the best I could with this. so, there.
"she is my scar" is going to the sapphic annals, isn't it?
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LMAOOOO the unblinking cat stare. rio is like I WAS TALKING TO YOU DUM-DUM. I KNOW IT, YOU KNOW IT, EVERYONE AROUND THIS GODDAMN FIRE KNOWS IT. CAN YOU PLEASE PLEASE FUCKING TALK TO ME PLEASE DEAR GOD
and agatha doing a teeny tiny side glance and going whoooooooops not looking! I'm NOT looking! I'm not even here! and scrunching her face more and more trying to keep it blank
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AND she's gone. she's so predictable lmaooo. every dang time.
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awkwaaaaaard
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rio with her soft smile again! with the little amused eye roll! never getting mad at agatha's antics. she's like FINE I'll come after you, you BIG BABY. the patience this woman has
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lilia is so scared of rio because somehow, through her exceptional Seer abilities, she knew instinctively that this is her mortal foe. but something funny has just happened: here in front of her there's just a regular little guy, a bit odd maybe, doing her little thing, trying to talk to her ex. might it be... might it be that death isn't a monster, that it's just a thing, a strange but natural thing that happens to everybody? lilia cannot accept that quite yet. so she grabs rio and says no, no. I've seen what you are. you're scary, you're evil, you're dangerous. this is lilia's survival instincts kicking in. we are simply wired to fear death, that's just how humans are. it takes an exceptional mind and soul to see past that.
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oh god, here we go, here we go. deep breaths (I'm telling this to myself tbh. i need the pep talk)
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stroking her hair so gently. soft, tentative.
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hey, subtitle people??? what the fuck??
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rio just stands and stares. lets agatha decide what comes next, goes at her pace always
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the haiR CARESSING
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the HUG. the BIG SIGH. this bitch was running away screaming from rio just yesterday. and here she is. her love. her partner. she finally acknowledges rio's pain and all that they lost and all that they were (and still are tbh) to each other. THIS is what rio was looking for. she's not flirting to manipulate and deflect now, she's not being somebody else. this is agatha cracked open and bleeding love and sorrow
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and they melt into each other, and they're rocking each other back and forth, with all their pain and tenderness and longing
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agatha with her face buried in rio's shoulder. I'm unwell
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and then agatha gently pushes rio back and strokes her hair and cradles her face like she did so many times before and leans in and here I am giving you a play-by-play and running a commentary like a totally normal and sane person would
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you know what makes for a perfect onscreen kiss imo? no it's not tongue, although these two will give us plenty of that too. it's the TREMBLING. THE HESITATION. THE YEARNING.
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rio and her superhuman willpower. couldn't be me.
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and and and and and agatha looks at her puzzled for a second and doesn't register what's happening and dives for a kiss again she's so far gone. the feral animal noises I'm making you have no idea
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THE ICY SHOWER
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THE STEP BACK. THE MOST PAINED SMILE
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THE REGRET
I think one big reason why agatha is always so calculated is because she's afraid her instincts will take over. she does something big and spectacular and stupid and then calls it a 'calculated risk' when it was actually a rush of fear, desire, sorrow, anger that she couldn't control. tonight rio has managed to poke a little hole into a carefully constructed dam, and now all the water is rushing out and tearing down the walls. agatha has rio in her arms and her shape, her scent, her skin are so nostalgic and familiar. her brain goes on autopilot, she's been lonely for so long, she is FAMISHED for love and connection and sex and acceptance. rio wanted her to open up, but agatha doesn't do half-measures. rio wanted her to give for a change, but agatha can only ever take.
rio HAS to put a stop to it. she puts logic before heart, one of them has to and you know agatha isn't gonna. more than anything rio wants to take this one perfect moment and run away with it, but instead she tears herself away and asks, what happens next? what happens if I have to take billy away from you? that reanimated corpse, that freak of nature who walked into your life only yesterday and took over?
billy is now part of the equation and rio cannot ignore it. she has been so gentle and careful with agatha, easing her into a reconciliation that is now in jeopardy because here comes billy maximoff like a sword of damocles! what happens if agatha takes her back only for rio to break her heart all over again? there would be no coming back from that. rio cannot help being the grim reaper just as much as agatha cannot help being a succubus, and she is almost at her breaking point here. because she is hurting too! she is sick of having to be the mature one! she's sick of always coming in second after all of agatha's issues! turns out there's a limit even to the heartbreak an impossibly old and wise being can take.
(and now I need a smoke and a future episode that is just 30 minutes of hot but soft cuddles and kisses and sweet nothings. please.)
once again a big shoutout and thank you to all the people reaching out and leaving comments, it's incredible to hear from you all @crybabyheathen @onceuponalegendbg @idkbroletssee @psychicsolanum @73chn1c0l0rr3v3l @a-tad-bit-obsessed @a-rusty-bucket-of-woes @miacheezytoon @isagrimorie @april-december @aquaaquila and I'm probably forgetting someone but I see you all and I appreciate you so much!
and now for something extra
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Vi and Jayce being gym bros in a modern AU!! I love them so much.
I need them to do dumb shenanigans together so bad. Like just being in the same room together neutralizes their brain cells.
Like Jayce is a big-name scientist known as one of the smartest people in the world, but he and Vi get together to hang out, and the world starts seeing them do the DUMBEST SHIT on tiktok.
And the internets like, “this is world-renowned genius scientist Jayce Talis??? The guy who did all of these world-changing scientific papers??? Who revolutionized prosthetics, mobility aids, and medicine with his partner Viktor Talis??? Making… weapons shaped like genitalia in his forge??? With a random butch- IS THAT FAMOUS BOXER VIOLET KIRAMMAN????”
Them getting drunk together and breaking stuff with “My girl is mad at me :( I hope I die T^T” in the caption.
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cutehoons02 · 1 day ago
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I NEED TO MEET MY HUMAN PILLOW??
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*pairing: bad boy producer Chan x good girl
*tags: problems of insomnia, mocking, teasing, not understanding each other, little jealousy, fluff at the end
* synopsis: Chan has been unable to sleep for more than 4 hours for almost a month and maybe he will just have to find his soul mate to overcome his insomnia…
If you like i would write a second part
* word count: 4k (Tell me if you like this kind of stories:)
—REBLOG if you enjoyed
© cutehoons02 all rights reserved 2024.
(English is not my native language)
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Chan loved to produce music, he could be one of the most famous idols and love performing and dancing in front of thousands of people or singing vintage songs to his fans but one thing that stimulated him more and more was spending hours producing, correct verses of poems he had written while he was on the other side of the world or, start to try to feel the rhythm of melodies that were beginning to take shape in his head but also in his console and computer; that was the thing he loved most about being a singer not the events where everyone was impeccably dressed and looked like puppets. He also loved to produce because he could only do so after the exhausting dance workouts or the various recorded content they did during the week for fans, all the other members of the group went back to their dorm rooms to rest or walked around the Korean capital like normal people; instead, he was for weeks, let’s not fool ourselves, he always suffered from insomnia and did not even remember how good it was to wake up after a nice eight-hour sleep. That night was another night out in his studio composing or writing down some verses for the next album, the only company he had was that of his little dog who was snoring and making beautiful dreams, he was a little bit jealous because he too would have wanted to sleep so happily and at 4 in the morning he lay down on the sofa that he had bought for other members and began to scroll through various social notifications until his eyes were closed for a few hours.
Y/n had been working for the Stray Kids for almost a year in the social media department, loved how every week she could knock down his ideas and have even for twenty minutes of fun members recording funny challenges in the pool while they tried to record, while they were traveling to some European city for some event such as the fashion week; with her caramel macchiato and sweet pretzel she walked into the floor where most of the employees had a small recreation room with a small kitchen and tables, but a light coming from the studio where they were recording songs made her turn back. Y/n was a curious person and sometimes he did not want to have all this curiosity. Still, without thinking about it he knocked slowly at the door and after a minute without an answer, he came in. She saw the leader of Stray Kids lying on his belly with slightly ruffled hair and wearing a baseball hat sleeping peacefully with his dog next to him who had already seen the foreign presence of Y/n and ran down to lick them a shoe. Chan was really the representation of the dream boy of Y/n but after a year they had very few interactions together and those few they had were embarrassing, only Felix knew of the small crush she had on Y/n for Chan, but Chan behaved as if it did not exist or perhaps he had never liked because he always wore something pink, always had in his hand one of those coffees all processed even worse that drink green color called matcha, or sometimes brought them homemade cookies to cheer and give a little sweetness to the guys after hours of training and this thing always made him raise his eyes because not even a year later all hung from the lips of Y/ n and did not understand why. It was almost 8:30 and all the other members were coming to work Y/n thought it wasn’t so nice to find all the other members making fun of Chan because he was sleeping in a super sweet position. Still, his face was squashed in the pillow and those beatings of his "children" would have played a few tricks on him, so Y/n slowly spiked with his little hand hidden in the sweatshirt in Chan’s side but did not move an inch, had never touched him by a centimeter and was seriously nervous in the pottery touch so for a moment she set aside her shyness for the leader and slightly pulled him off, heard a small sound coming from his mouth and the arm that he had dangling in the armrest of the sofa put it into the Y/n sweatshirt and his heart began to pump slightly more than necessary. He hated the effect it had on her and hated how everyone got along instead she was to his eyes like a ghost, Y/n put his slightly cold hand in Chan’s face and looked at him for a second before talking to him "Christopher Bang Chan get up there are paparazzi at the door taking pictures of you!" raised his voice slightly to wake him, Everyone knew of Chan’s fear of the paparazzi but he seemed to be seriously in his dream world so he took his pretzel and put it under his nose as if it were an animal and pulled his hair out of his hat and gave him a slight slap in the face with the sleeve of his sweatshirt and after a few seconds he saw two hazel eyes looking at her evil and immediately moved away from his grip and dropped his sweet pretzel in Chan’s chest.
Of all the people who could find him in that state, the girl who smelled of cotton candy and spring flowers had to wake him up! “Do you know that it is strictly forbidden to enter my studio, especially for a person who has nothing to do with music?" He got up slightly from the couch and began to sit as if it were a feline and saw for a second the eye of Y/n linger in the black underwear of the Supreme, knew the effect he had on girls but a sweet smile formed on his lips because even the sweet and shy Y/n had a soft spot for him, but he immediately turned away and went to his Cafe, It was obviously not a normal coffee but had cream on top and little bits of sugar, Chan tore his eyes, how could you drink something like that to wake up if they had invented the existence of a nice steaming cup of coffee without sugar to wake up.
"Uhm sorry, i didn’t want to invade your privacy but i saw a flake light coming from your studio and i had thought that someone had forgotten it on or i was afraid that you were.." You didn’t even finish the sentence because with a snap he gave you the sign to be quiet and nonchalance got up and started drinking from your straw your caramel macchiato and ate even a piece of your pretzel. “Or maybe you were just curious and wanted to pry and invade my privacy" Rolled your eyes and looked at Chan "I didn’t want to invade your privacy i would never, i was saying that, i was afraid something happened to you or maybe you left the light on for that i entered, i even knocked for almost a minute but no one answered me" you had never had such a long conversation with the leader of the group and in your head, you did not want to seem cynical towards him but he had seriously misread you. "They never told you that it’s bad manners to roll your eyes in front of a person, god how do you drink this thing at 8 o'clock in the morning to wake up is definitely disgusting. Well now you see I’m fine so you could leave i don’t need a little girl to take care of me!" was literally finishing that concoction of sugars and saw Y/n to caress his dog. “I know it’s rude to roll your eyes in front of someone but it’s not my fault if when you wake up you’re slightly bad mood, there are personal rooms with a bed because people need to feel comfortable and sleep, It is not healthy for your body and mind to sleep at work and especially in a sofa that is also small for your physique, if you have problems with sleep there are a lot of purely natural remedies. God, how does this little dog worship you if you’re like that?" Chan looked at you very badly and he laughed slightly "In addition to not tolerating your presence, are you psychoanalyzing me? What do you know about my insomnia problems Y/n, It’s not your business and i repeat, I have no need to listen to the advice of a young girl at her first steps into the world of adults so go away and thank you for this breakfast 5 stars Michelin i will never try again in my life to drink something with so many sugars" You felt the door open and Felix with his angelic hair entered the room laughing "Don’t tell me you spent the night here again inside Chan, you have to seriously find some remedy for your insomnia because you behave like a jerk with everyone, Even with Y/n that is the sweetest girl on this planet" The two guys looked at you, one was smiling instead of the other would have never met you. “Let me be Felix didn’t start the day well and I have to do not know how many things with you, and the less time i’m away from sweet things the better!" A small puff came out of your mouth and you greeted Felix before heading into the recreation room where everyone seemed happy and relaxed.
Chan without even realizing it was chewing and sipping little sips of your caramel macchiato and Changbin was literally open-mouthed, his leader had not had a drink with so much sugar in his life and drank those drinks only Y/n. "Why are you drinking a caramel macchiato with double cream and double caramel? Don’t tell me you’ve overcome your insomnia thanks to some sugars?" Chan looked at Changbin first and then in his hand, the glass of Y/n's half-finished drink had drunk it all himself without anyone’s help. " You know i don’t like to waste food so for once even if this thing is literally disgusting i’ve bought it" The group members nodded but were extremely worried about their leader because it was almost a month that he had not slept peacefully for more than 4 hours and had tried everything, from herbal teas, some members have even tried to sleep with him but with little result, natural herbal infusions, medicines, they had even taken him to make especially relaxing massages to see him fall asleep and relax but none of these things made them see their leader relaxed and sleep for even 6 hours."You know i saw a series where a guy could get sleep when he was with his lover maybe it’s happening to you too, maybe your soul mate is close to you and fate is trying to give you some signals to try sleeping with her and relax. I read on the internet that many couples can only fall asleep when they are together maybe you are also doing something like this!" Chan had seriously the balls to listen to his members at that time. "Sure Han, you see somewhere my soul mate with whom i can share my beauty sleep. I thought i had raised normal human beings, not dreamers who believe in fairy tales of fate". A light knock removed the problems of Chan’s insomnia and Y/n came in with a bag of gingerbread-shaped cookies all colored, Chan at that moment would have wanted to have a thousand paparazzi in front of him instead of the young content creator of the Stray Kids with her perfume of cotton candy and flowers, "We have to go record some content in the terrace but before i brought you some cookies, i know that many of you love them so..." Chan did not finish the sentence in Y/n that he took his bag and threw all his cookies into the basket where there were all the empty boxes of fried chicken with the liquid of various drinks. All members looked down at Y/n and then at Chan "What the fuck is going on with you Chan, Y/n had made those cookies, especially for me because you are so bad with her?" Chan looked at Han furiously and with a veil of sadness Y/n leaving the room and maybe it was true he had to find some remedy for his lack of sleep because he had never felt so tired, a bad mood and bad with a person.
It had been a few days since that episode and Chan had not slept much and his appearance was getting worse even with the makeup to perfection he seemed extremely tired and hurt from all the events that had happened, he tried to talk to you but you were immediately away from his gaze and deserved it, some members with him were distant and angry, but the others had tried again to make them drink insomnia-cures and take care of their leader as he had done with them countless times. It was nine o'clock in the evening and he had just finished recording a piece for the new album with Felix "Chris, i think it’s better if we stop working today and go for a night walk. We can also get some drinks or snacks during the walk" Chris nodded, he loved spending time with his Australian friend so they found themselves walking near Han River in an area that they had never been to. Chan saw Felix get up and give him a bag full of snacks both sweet and savory. “Well now i think it’s time to come home at 11 o'clock in the evening but you want to go into your study or our dorm you will have to go apologize with Y/n, see that house with red bricks? She lives with her friends from the university and surely they will be awake because there is light on. Do the right thing because no one will open your dorm room or even your study, good night Chris!".
Chan was speechless until he saw the Uber with Felix inside and started walking to the apartment you shared with your friends, had serious fear and embarrassment to play but heard from the small lobby the laughter of your friends and took courage. "Second floor, the black door I left you a tip in the door good work" a voice unknown to him made open the door of the hall, started to climb up to the second floor quickly and in front of if there was a tiny girl with red hair with the slightly opened mouth "Do i look or do you look frightfully like the boy who is attached to the posters in Sunaa’s room, where is my dinner? Oh my, you’re not the pizza boy but that guy who sang that Green Day song that Y/n had to spend a whole night editing for videos of your concert". Chan thought he was living in a simulation who was this Sunaa who had her posts in the room and who was this chick who spoke like a machine? "Uhm nice to meet you, i'm Bang Chan i know that maybe it is really me in the posters in your friend’s room, there by chance, Y/n in the house, i should talk to him" Sunaa’s friend let him in the house and a smell of chocolate cake came from the kitchen and a girl slightly busy checking the oven watched him enter their kitchen "Y/n is taking a shower but in 5 minutes she will be here, make yourself at home, you want some cookies, freshly baked cake, hot tea with cookies..." the other girl was trying to get her cake out of the oven and gave Lily the red-haired girl a little look. " Sorry i don’t often come to this house except for my boyfriend so when i meet strangers if i’m slightly embarrassed i talk about it, i am Lily a friend of Y/n, the pastry lady next to me is Sarah, Sunaa the girl with your posters right now will be over the ocean somewhere because she’s a hostess and you know her Y/n works for your group" Chan felt slowly less embarrassed and looked carefully at the kitchen that divided the living room with a large white sofa and two pink puffs. " I would be fine with a glass of water and a cookie, it’s okay if I’m the one who should be embarrassed at this moment to show up at 11 in a house made up only of girls". “Don’t worry Lily’s boyfriend comes to visit her at 2 am to sleep with her even for only five hours we are used to, oh Y/n look who came to visit you is Felix right? It’s not that Bang Chan you say so much that he is an asshole to you but that he finds him extremely" would run with the hair half wet by your friend Sarah to put a hand on his mouth and watch Chan amused while eating a cookie, you had heard an extremely and uncharacteristically familiar voice coming from the living room but you thought it was your brain to make it here, instead there really in front of you was that individual Bang Chan sitting in your living room with a grin.
"What are you doing in my house? Do you want to make fun of me, to throw your anger on me and invade my living space and also in my house?" Your friends looked at you slightly surprised, but you were always the one who tried to make peace when there was a difference between them. " I just wanted to talk to you Y/n and i would like to do it in private" Chan looked at your friends and bowed and saw you walking down a corridor and entered a beautiful clean room with obviously a slightly pink bed, some vinyl of artists like The Weeknd-Childish Gambino-Ariana Grande-Beatles etc, There were lots of pictures of you and your friends and family attached, but one thing made him smile and warm his heart you had some Stray Kids albums and lots of photos you took with members during your travels. Until that moment he knew you had become friends with the other members but he did not realize that this year with some you had really formed a good relationship of trust and mutual friendship, especially with the youngest ones who were almost your age.
"I’ve been a serious asshole to you for the past year and i don’t even know why, at first i did not even notice your presence but slowly i saw that you were always with some of the group and bothered me because you were always so happy and positive with everyone but this is not a reason why i had to act like an asshole with you. I even brought you your favorite snacks i guess, i don’t want to start with lies about our relationship, i didn’t know that you lived here Felix brought me and he gave me this bag." You knew that Chan was a smart guy and good with everyone and annuities, honestly, you did not expect to see him at your home and much less in your room, you could not stand it because even if your room was slightly large it took too much space and you felt suffocated. "Understood, it was not necessary to come here to me at almost midnight you could tell me even at work and then there is no relationship to start, we have never been friends or who knows else so" A slight yawn formed in your mouth and you watched Chan look at you like a puppy and then sat down in your bed "Well i could first apologize to you and then slowly become your "friend" as you are with Felix or Han" You were seriously tired of everything and every one and you didn’t want to become friends with Han also because your heart was beating faster in his presence and this thing did not happen when you were with Han or with Felix. "I accept your apologies Chan but at this time i would only sleep and it is now midnight and i know that the Y/n is awake and head on his shoulders is going to fall asleep standing, what do you say we talk about this face when i’m ready and with a good caramel macchiato hand that gives me the right dose of sugars to wake up?". Chan was a bit amazed by the honesty that you had to get him away from you but you said you wanted to talk to him awake so maybe he didn’t completely lose hope with you. " Sure, it was better as you said yourself if i spoke to you at work not at midnight when you can see that you are really tired and that you are looking forward to sleeping maybe i should go. Don’t need me to walk you to the door go to bed tomorrow at 8 we must be ready to go out of Seoul to record" You saw him coming out of the door and heard a light whisper "Blessed are you that you will sleep this night".
you walked in his direction and you took an arm and made it turn "If you want to sleep with me, in the sense of trying to sleep not to do strange things, oh god you got me right? I know you can’t sleep anywhere but my bed is the most comfortable and i also use a special fragrance that I itch every time I change the sheets to relax and make me sleep better if you don’t snore and if you don’t get too excited there’s room for you too because it’s enough big" Chan looked at you carefully, your cheeks were slightly reddened and you hid your hands in the big sweatshirt that you wore as pajamas and a smile formed in his mouth "You have a strange way of asking things Y/n, Meanwhile I tried them all so if you’re not embarrassed to have a guy in bed with you willingly also because I don’t even know what part of Seoul we are and I have no desire to go back to the dormitory." " No embarrassment I asked you and then you’re not the first guy who sleeps with me, as long as you don’t snore or that you don’t move much" Chan felt a pinch of protection or maybe jealousy towards you and nodded sitting in your bed, He took off his sweatshirt and a slightly over t-shirt where he showed extremely big biceps and thank god he had on pants because he would not be able to sleep in jeans. You looked at him carefully but turned away immediately because you did not want to be a maniac because of his biceps or his big hands, Chan knew the effect it made you carefully, and a smile formed on his lips, and lay down in your bed. " Well thank you Y/n, tomorrow morning i will offer you a caramel macchiato or i will go to get it at dawn while it is already much if i can sleep for three hours" Y/n raised her duvet and became small as she entered her bed and made herself comfortable near the end of the bed on her side.
"Don’t be so negative, try i can imagine things that make you happy i know the sea in Australia or beaches before trying to sleep you, i do this when i’m nervous and then i can sleep" Chan saw you so far away from him that he started to laugh "Y/n, you can sit back and relax. In what sense do you imagine beautiful things? don’t tell me that before falling asleep you fantasize about me!" You looked terrible Chan and threw your pillow in his face "Are you crazy? Why should i ever dream about you when i have to put up with you already at work and even when i enter Sunaa’s room i must see your face! The less i have you in my thoughts the better" Chan was seriously laughing at the situation that you had just created and for a while, he did not feel so happy and worry-free before going to bed. " You said that you imagine beautiful things so you will surely fantasize about me, i'm the most beautiful of the group, Y/n. Now however you sleep that tomorrow morning you have to be presentable at work otherwise you will take words" You looked up and lay down, giving Chan your back and without being seen you smiled and i put a hand on your head for the slight embarrassment that was growing in you.
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revelboo · 1 day ago
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Gah, the swindle fic was so, so good!!! I feel so bad for saying it, but I was talkin’ about Swerve, the lil dork that runs the bar in Lost Light!!! I’m so sorry!!! 😭
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This little bozo!!! :)
Yes, you were xD I was working on the next Scavengers when I saw it and my brain just went: Swindle. Ignore me, it’s cold and I’m struggling
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Lose Control
IDW Swerve x Reader
• Placing a clean glass back where it goes, Swerve surveys his kingdom. Aside from Trailbreaker sprawled across the bar top making a low rumbling sound as he recharges, the bar is empty and quiet. It’s something he never thought he’d have, a space to call his own. Where he’s in charge and listened to. “Third last call, big guy,” he says, reaching out to nudge Trailbreaker with a servo. “You know you can’t keep sleeping in here.” Mostly because when he wakes up, he’ll start drinking again and he can’t open if Breaker drinks all the inventory. Again.
• “Seriously? Don’t make me drag you,” he groans, knowing it’s an empty threat. Trailbreaker is as big as two of him and then some. There’s no budging him short of going and asking Magnus for help. And listening to the complaints about his bar and Magnus’s love language- rule violations. No, he’d rather take his chances with one very over energized mech. Which means babysitting all night to protect the bar. Frag.
• After kicking Trailbreaker’s stool again, he wanders around the bar. Bored and tired. “I don’t care if you’re my best customer,” he mutters, dragging a table slightly away from a wall. And there’s a sharp cry and a tiny shape darting from the shadows. Somehow that manages to wake up Breaker. Everything seems to slow as he sees the small form running alongside the bottom of the bar, sees Breaker shift and slide out of his stool, a ped coming down. And he’s running, diving with his hands outstretched. Feels that soft body hit his palms as Breaker steps on him instead and comes down on him.
• Flung off balance, you roll end over end and go sliding. Realizing that the big monster had almost stepped on you without even noticing and the smaller one had pushed you out of the way to take the brunt of the impact himself. Your confused brain is screaming at you to run, but as your rescuer groans, you can’t. “What happened?” The bigger one complains as the red one hits him, flailing to get free.
• “You’re crushing me,” Swerve snarls, venting raggedly as he gets loose, head turning to find the human still there, eyes wide as you stare up at him. Tensed to bolt, but waiting instead. “Hey, tiny.” Wiggling his fingers at you only makes you back up a step, expression uncertain. “I wouldn’t run. I at least see you,” he tries, as Trailbreaker gets to his feet and staggers away, gawking. Of course he’d heard the rumors of Brainstorm’s screwup, but the machine was destroyed. Right? And you glance from him to Breaker and back, and take a tentative step forward. A human that shouldn’t be here, doesn’t belong. Too small to survive, and he gets being smaller than every other bot except maybe Tailgate. He’s short, but you can be stepped on. “Little things need to stick together.”
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