#hes acting a fool hes not having a psychotic break

[itsjustpoopeh]

I just want to remind everyone once again bc I'm so fucking tired of seeing it

Eddie's will doesn't give Buck jack shit as far as rights are concerned as long as Eddie is alive. he is not Chris's legal guardian or anything at all at this point. unless Eddie made some other legal arrangements that he also did not tell Buck about, if Eddie is incapacitated Chris goes to his nearest family. that's his grandparents. periodt

(and I'm not even getting into how fucking easy it would be to get it overturned if he did make other arrangements ESPECIALLY if he didn't inform Buck about them)

[shadystranger]

I never took dean's extremely antagonistic attitude towards sam drinking blood as compared to anything else really seriously. While in first seasons they were still new to weird and their reactions might have been not as desanitized as later seasons it was always kinda clear he was illogical about this. The immoralness of demon blood was a pretense at most. An excuse dean could latch onto to clad his deep-seated personal unadulterated hatred to sam seeking someone else. And also his insecurity that his place- his entire purpose is easily being replaced/filled by ruby and taken right from under his nose and he's so driven up the wall he acts unreasonably and borderline psychotic like locking sam up and emotionally manipulating him to prevent it, when that doesn't work he resorts to violence. He was rationalizing his ugly feelings of hostile defensiveness and jealousy as some kind of a higher moral endeavor, but it was painfully obvious that was not the case. Dean literally at some point implies he agrees that sam is doing good and he's willing to accept him back but ruby is a deal breaker he unintentionally makes a visible distinction between it being a corruption/-humanitydescend issue and a more gripe that demon blood is rooted in dependence on demons and/or the constant need for supply; leaving sam not entirely dependent on dean alone. (Combine this with dean's emphasis on them finally being together and for nothing to come between them in s2&1)

Sam killed demons, he could exorcise people without killing them, he could kill Lilith and prevent the apocalypse (what they believed at the time) all objectively good acts. But dean blatantly did not care. Because his issue was never in the moralness of it or ''becoming less human'' hell this guy covered up for sam in an instant when he killed a hunter without thought. He threatened anyone to not lay a finger on sam when he thought sam was 100% going to turn into a monster and start killing them all (rather wanted to stay with him). Come demon blood and he suddenly is narratively very expected to kill sam out of moral obligation? Nahh it's a very fucked up psychotic break from a possessive driven mad who used up all his cards and is not willing to hand down what he finally owed to someone else so he's going to make sure no one else can have what he doesn’t. Dean stringed bobby along with him thinking they were both doing a savior mission for sam's ultimate sake and the world's when they were both on very different pages. Heck bobby is not the only one dean had fooled it was the audience and the narrative too. Insanely ironic

[whetstonefires]

A funny defining feature of mxtx's writing, as a danmei novelist, someone who is technically working in erotica, is she seems to be unable to seriously visualize a competent top.

Like. She will imply that competent topping took place, or might be about to. She will state that somebody performed the fuck act in an enjoyable way that probably wasn't super weird and confused.

But all her actual sex scenes seem to involve the top being cognitively compromised (drunk, in a confused dream state, in a fuck-sword-driven psychotic break, etc), or just straight-up not having any idea what he's doing and making a fool of everyone involved in the process.

Any of these alone would just register as like, genre convention deconstruction or something, and she certainly is doing that. Maybe hualian will get some x-tras eventually and we'll have another datapoint, but the fact that she's opted to take the sex off-page entirely so far for MC-mk3-the-ones-who-aren't-a-trashfire kind of ties into the pattern imo.

The question is, does she just find (penetrative?) sex so fundamentally weird and unpleasant that's the only kind of sex scene she can write, or is she taking refuge in irony because a fully sincere sex scene that's still laughable is super embarrassing, and she Will Not be Airplane? Or does she think incompetence is sexy???

I don't think it's that last one, but people have many different tastes and kinks in this world.

[3dfangs]

I dont know how else to say this, but fully ignoring and pretending a disabled / psychotic (coded) homeless person doesnt exist is actually evil of the people around him. I dont care how power hungry or how much of a bad person he was / Is. They knew he was there. They knew what he had gone through (to some extent). And they fully left him for dead.

Do you not think their werent points where he genuinely was so low he would have taken the help? Even if he snapped back out of it and did do something shitty, does that not mean he still doesnt deserve help? Is the take really 'Hes selfish so he doesnt deserve actual help'. Does that not sound fucking shitty at all?

Yes, hes not a good person. Yes, he can be as evil as the player allows him to be. Yes, he does bad things. But doesnt make him less of a fucking person. Being ignored and abandoned and abused is not what he should have to go through. Yeah hes stubborn, yeah he makes bad choices. But hes still a living thing. As much as his puppet like form might fool people into see him as less.

And as stated, he can only be as evil as the player let's him be. If you're being evil, hes of course gonna use that to his advantage. Hes gonna take anything he can get to get out of his shitty position and get his strings off him, get into 'heaven' or as close to it as he can. Hes clearly an extremely broken person and yes he does bad things. I'm never gonna say hes not a flawed or bad person, but hes still worthy of someone, anyone, helping him.

From canon we know none of his past friends helped him, why would anyone else in the city do so? Why would anyone else have reason to help him? All his part friends pretended like he didnt even exist. Do you know how fucked up that is? Can you imagine how fucked that would be for someone with clear delusions to have to go through? They didnt even care again till he was actually dead. That's fucking cruel. Acting like they're not bad (or at least handled the Spamton situation horribly) is laughable.

Not only that, at least one of them is ACTUALLY just as bad a person! Fully also using the snow grave route to their advantage, or at least attempting to before being put in the ring they try to sell you to kill MORE people! And knew what it would do! They had no excuse of wanting to break free of any situation or any sort of deeper reason to this that we can tell. There literal only motive is power (from what can be assumed). This doesnt make Spamton less evil in snow grave of course, but why did another addison also try to use the situation to their advantage? We know what Spamton wants or has to gain (freedom, heaven, power, control of him and possibly others, etc.) But what an ad who already seemed to be well off have to gain? And why did they have the ring in the first place?

Going back to my main point tho. Tldr: Spamton is a homeless person who shouldnt be ignored or taken less seriously just because hes not inherently 'good' or 'perfect'. Hes still a person and doesnt deserve to suffer just because people want to pretend he doesn't exist because it would be easier for them then actually trying to help him. And yes, that does make his ex friends bad when it comes to how they handled the situation. Not because they were trying to be or that they're inherently bad or evil. But Spamton is allowed to be as mad at them as he wants for how they choice to treat him.

[babymetaldoll]

DIWK: Chapter eleven: "Can't get you off my mind"

|Word count:  9,7K

Summary:  Reader struggles with her feelings for Spencer and tries to work with Seaver. Neither of those things works. Spencer's headaches are getting worse. Also, it's Anderson's birthday! Things are getting a little more complicated.

Warnings:  Hardcore fools in love. It's getting painful to watch. Spoilers of Criminal Minds Season 6 Episode 11. 25 to life. Cursing, and frustration. Alcohol consumption. Assholes being blind.

A/N: Please don't hate me! but these two are just so blind, it hurts!

Masterlist

Chapter one | Chapter two | Chapter three | Chapter four | Chapter five | Chapter six | Chapter seven | Chapter eight | Chapter nine | Chapter ten | Chapter eleven | Chapter twelve | Chapter thirteen | Chapter fourteen | Chapter fifteen |

.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.•*•.

Spencer's point of view

Psychotics in a break always evolve. Well, I was psychotic at that minute of my life, but the only things evolving were my migraines. They were driving me insane. I could feel them taking over my life, my head, my sanity. I could feel my good judgment slipping through my fingers every day, especially since (Y/N) had started acting strange.

It wasn't like she had stopped talking to me or hanging out with me. But I could feel a void growing between us every day. And it was driving me insane. I couldn't understand where it had come from. I just knew it was eating me alive.

Morgan was having a bad day. One really bad day. The man he had vouched for parole had just murdered a man after nearly 70 hours of freedom, and now the team was trying to solve the whole case. Don Sanderson claimed he had been framed guilty of the murder of his wife and baby daughter, but after 25 years in prison, the first thing he did as a free man was to murder someone else.

It made no sense.

We had visited the murder scene. Hotch was still on a leave, so it was just Prentiss, (Y/N), Morgan, Rossi, Seaver, and I. Emily was in full "training agent's duty," walking Seaver through every step of the procedure, which was very nice of her. It was her first case after the incident in New Mexico, and she was eager to do better work than that time. She was nearly jumping all over the place, taking notes.

I talked with Garcia on the phone because he was worried about Morgan, and then I walked to (Y/N), who kept a safe distance from Emily and Seaver.

- "The bullets were in the other room, but the gun is right here,"- I said as I looked around the room. (Y/N) turned to me, ready to speak her mind, but Ashley spoke first, which annoyed her beyond belief.

- "Maybe killing him was an accident."

I looked at my best friend as Prentiss and Ashley continued talking. She just crossed her arms and walked around the room. She surely wasn't dealing well with having Seaver around. I wanted to ask her something, anything, but nothing came to mind.

- "Sanderson was out of prison for what, Reid?"- I answered Emily's question but didn't even turn to look at her. My eyes were following (Y/N), moving around that room.

- "At the time of the murder, 51 hours."

- "He's free for 2 days and change? What's the big hurry to find this guy?"

- "Are you ok?"- I whispered and stood next to (Y/N) as Prentiss and Ashley kept analyzing the scene.

- "Yeah, just tired."

- "Do you wanna have dinner with me tonight? I didn't see you this weekend, and I thought we could do a movie night."

(Y/N) took her time to answer, but finally, after a moment, she nodded and agreed.

- "Movie night sounds nice."

- "Great, ‘cos I rented your favorites."- I might have sounded more excited than I should, but I had really missed her those days, and I may or may not have watched and read Pride and Prejudice a couple of times.

- "Did you? Really?"

- "Yes, I was hoping to spend some time with you."

- "Are you coming, Spence?"- Seaver interrupted us and looked from the door- "Rossi called. They are interviewing Sanderson at the BAU."

- "Yeah, we are coming,"- I answered and looked away. (Y/N) shook her head and walked outside in silence the second Prentiss called my name, and I couldn't follow her. Which, I guess, was a good thing.

- "Is everything ok?"- Emily stayed behind with me. She raised an eyebrow, watching (Y/N) walking out of the room as Ashley waited for us by the door.

- "Yes?"- my answer came more as a question because I honestly didn't know what to say- "Everything is ok, Emily."

- "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I have the feeling (Y/N) isn't thrilled to have agent Seaver around."- I almost chuckled at her words and just nodded.

- "It's not like she has made it hard to tell. She literally yelled at her at the jet."

- "Is she mad at me because I am supervising her training?"

- "I don't know. I don't think so… she hasn't told me so. Well, she hasn't talked to me much lately."

- "Why? Did you fight?"- Prentiss wide opened her eyes and moved a little closer to me, trying to read my expressions.

- "No, I don't know what's going on. She just… we…"- I couldn't find the right words to explain my mind, and I think Prentiss knew it, ‘cos she didn't push me.

- "You should talk to her."

- "Yeah, we are going out tonight."

- "You have a date?"- Ashley walked over and asked me with a short smile. I cleared my throat and shook my head right away.

- "No, just meeting with a friend."

- "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to intrude,"- Seaver blushed and looked at her shoes. Prentiss smiled, probably reading something I wasn't seeing.

- "Come on, Rossi is probably waiting for us at the BAU, and I'm guessing Morgan is not in a good mood."

For the rest of the day, I tried to find a moment alone with (Y/N). I needed to talk about what was going on. But it was impossible. We worked late, rereading the original case files, trying to find something that might help us help Sanderson. But it was frustrating and nearly impossible.

So around nine, we decided to call it a day and go home.

- "Are you in the mood for Chinese?"- I looked at (Y/N), gathering all the things as I stood next to her desk- I thought maybe we could get some take-out from that place you love on our way home.

- "Sounds nice. What are we watching?"

- "Pride and Prejudice, Coraline, maybe Beetlejuice. You pick, I've got all your favorites,"- (Y/N) narrowed her eyes, looking at me in silence- "What?"

- "So you rented movies ‘cos you wanted to hang out with me?"

- "Yes."

- "You usually don't rent movies. You rent documentaries."

- "Yes, but I wanted to do something different this time. I told you I missed you."

(Y/N) blushed as she stood in front of me, biting the inner part of her cheek, trying not to smile. I looked at her, nearly beaming, excited to see her reaction. I had felt so scared to lose her, feeling her pushing away from me. It was a balm watching her so happy, and just because I missed her.

- "I love Pride and Prejudice,"- Ashley said from her desk- "I've read that book so many times, I think I can recite it."

I looked at her and nodded with an awkward smile. I knew she was just trying to be nice ‘cos she was new at the BAU, and she was also trying to be nicer to (Y/N), to get on her good side. But that wasn't the way to get to her. Maybe I had to talk to Seaver and explain that my best friend is a special woman.

Neither of us answered her comment. We just stood there, looking at her in silence, until Anderson walked over and waved.

- "Hey agents, before you go, I wanted to tell you, this Friday I'm celebrating my birthday, and I'd love to have you over."

- "Of course, Sonny!"- (Y/N) wide opened her eyes and clapped. She had called him "Sonny" since they sang "I got you babe" by Sonny and Cher in the karaoke at the Christmas party the year before.

- "Happy birthday, Anderson!"- Derek waved.

- "Thank you! We'll gather at a bar nearby. I'll text you the address."

- "We wouldn't miss it for the world,"- Prentiss added and smiled- "Do you mind if we tell JJ and Garcia?"

- "Please do! I haven't seen JJ since she left, and it would be amazing to have her over. You too, agent Seaver."

- "Thank you!"- Ashley smiled and nodded- "Count me in."

I could feel (Y/N)'s eyes rolling, annoyed, even when I wasn't even looking at her at that minute. I grabbed my bag and my coat and held her hand.

- "Bye, guys! See you tomorrow!"- that was all I said as I dragged her out of the bullpen. Emily waved at us, and Derek cut me an evil grin I could decode easily. I just ignored him and turned to the door.

- "Have fun, pretty girl!!"- Morgan chuckled at his own words, and (Y/N) just smiled and winked. Why? Probably to show him she didn't care about all his teasing, ‘cos nothing was ever going to happen between us.

(Y/N)'s point of view

It might have been childish, but I had to take advantage of Morgan's innuendo just to show Seaver things could happen between Spencer and me. It had been immature and silly, but I just felt like I needed to do it. It was like a stupid animal instinct that forced me to mark my territory.

I shouldn't have done it. Spencer wasn't mine. Not even close. And I had to stop being jealous of Seaver. If he didn't want me, he had the right to be with anyone else. But just the thought of Spencer being with someone, anyone, made me feel sick in my stomach. I hated being in love with him. I honestly did, ‘cos I didn't want to ruin our friendship with useless feelings. Spencer wasn't in love with me. He was just my friend. My very thoughtful, cute, adorable, and lovable best friend.

I was fucked. Completely and utterly fucked. Even that second, sitting on that couch with Spencer, I couldn't focus on the movie. I pretended, but I didn't even pay attention to it. All I could think of was how warm his body felt sitting next to me, like a gigantic magnet that called for me. I could simply just move my hand and intertwined his fingers with mine. Or lean in closer, rest my head on his shoulder, feel how he wraps an arm around me, and melt in his embrace, like I had done a million times before.

But I couldn't. I had to stop that daydream of a domestic and romantic life with Spencer. It wasn't healthy. It wasn't sane. But most of all: I wasn't real. And I was never going to move forward in life if I kept thinking those movie nights meant something.

- "More popcorn?- Spencer handed me the bowl, and I shook my head- "You have been awfully quiet considering we are watching Coraline."

- "Well, we are supposed to watch the movie in silence,"- I answered and didn't take my eyes from the screen.

- "You have never done that."

- "Maybe I wanted to give it a try."

I grabbed a bunch of popcorn just to keep myself busy. I could feel Spencer's eyes on me, and it was killing me ‘cos I knew I didn't have to look at him. If I did, I wasn't sure how I would react. I was overthinking everything and anything you might think of.

- "Are you ok?"

- "Yeah. Sure."

No, I wasn't.

- "(Y/N), can you look at me?"- Spencer paused the movie and turned to me. I hesitated, thinking my best friend is an amazing profiler, and I didn't want him to know how I felt about him ‘cos it didn't want to ruin our friendship.

After a few seconds, I moved on the couch and raised an eyebrow. His brown eyes stared into mine in silence for a moment, trying to read me.

- "What is going on?"

- "Nothing,"- I lied and frowned- "Why are you so obsessed with the idea something is going on?"

- "‘Cos I have this… feeling."

- "You got a feeling?"- I chuckled, trying to be funny but failing completely. In the end, I just stared into his eyes for what seemed to be a million years but were, in fact, just a few seconds.

- "Are we ok?"

- "Of course, we are, Spencer."

- "You never call me that"- he frowned immediately, almost hurt.

- "What?"

- "You just call me Spencer when we are on a case, and there are people around us. But when we are home, I'm never Spencer to you."

"When we are home." That killed me. I hadn't realized how badly I wanted that to be our home, to have a life with Spencer.

I was in love with my best friend. I was spending every single hour of every single day of my life with him. That wasn't right! If I knew he didn't have feelings for me, why was I doing that to myself?

- "(Y/N)?"- Spencer's voice took me from my thoughts. He looked so worried I didn't know how to convince him there wasn't anything wrong, considering it felt like everything was wrong.

- "What is it?"

- "Please tell me what's wrong."

- "I told you, nothing is wrong. I just called you Spencer. That's your name. It's a lovely name. I had never met someone called Spencer ever before in my entire life. You just called me (Y/N), not pumpkin, cupcake, chipmunk, or ma chère,"- he sighed, frustrated and maybe a little annoyed.

- "Nothing is wrong, honey. I'm really ok. Just tired, maybe feeling a little invaded with Seaver in the team"- I knew he knew I hated her, so I had to blame her in a way.

- "Why?"

- "You know I'm not her fan... I hate working with her,"- I kind of chuckled at my own words because I was trying to make a joke out of my awful reality.

- "It's just for a few weeks,"- he tried to reassure me, probably to ease my mood, but the truth was I hated how it always felt like he was defending her.

- "One week, one day, it's the same torture,"- I shook my head and turned to the screen again.

- "Don't be dramatic."

- "I'm not dramatic! I just hate how she is always playing the victim ‘cos her father is a serial killer. She is clearly overcompensating! Besides, we have all gone through bad shit in our lives, and no one is using it as a tool to get things in life."

- "I don't think that's what she is doing."

- "No? Do you think she belongs at the BAU? She is a trainee agent who almost got killed in her first assignment. She works hard, and she is not stupid, I give you that. But she is not top of her class. She is not there ‘cos she is the brightest. She is there ‘cos Rossi, Hotch, and probably Prentiss felt bad for her after what happened and decided to let her hang around and learn something for a while. If you ask me, I think there are more qualified trainee agents we could use in the team, but Seaver played her "my father was a serial killer" card and got the job. And who knows how many times she had done it before, and how many times she will use it again."

Ok, that may or may not have been too hard, but it was exactly how I felt. There was a deep silence in Spencer's apartment. The movie was still paused, and after my speech, Spencer just looked at me with wide-opened eyes. I just sighed and regretted every word that had left my lips ‘cos they made me sound bitter and shallow. But at least they didn't tell him the truth: that I was jealous of the thought Seaver might get his attention. Scared that he could look at her the way he had never looked at me. Just to imagine I could bump into them kissing terrified me.

- "Maybe I should just go home,"- I whispered and tried to stand up, but Spencer grabbed my arm and pulled me back onto the couch.

- "No, please. Stay,"- his voice was a whisper but still managed to shake me.

- "I don't wanna argue with you, honey,"- I thought I would speak too loud, but no, I actually murmured, matching his tone of voice.

- "We don't have to talk about Seaver anymore. Just watch the movie with me. You love this movie."

- "You love this book,"- I added and looked at him. He smiled. God, that smile is going to be the end of me.

- "It's just so dark! But it has such a good message."

- "Not all nice people are good people?"- I just spoke about what the book had meant to me ever since I was a little girl, and Spencer analyzed the whole plot again in less than a minute.

- "I was going to say overcoming your fears, but I like your analysis the most."

- "Of course, you do, ‘cos it's better,"- I teased and stuck out my tongue to him. Spencer just stared at me and nodded.

- "You might be right. Yours is much better,"- he kept his eyes on me for a few more seconds and continued smiling until he snapped from his thoughts- "More tea, ma chère?"

- "No, honey, thank you. I'm good."

I cut him a quick smile and sat back on the couch, trying to relax. I knew it was going to be impossible, but I honestly didn't want to leave. I wanted to be with him. I had stayed home alone the whole weekend, hidden underneath a pile of blankets, in something that looked pretty much like a fort, according to Lu's words. She had stayed with me Saturday night ‘cos I told her I needed a girl's night. It was my poor attempt to stay away from Reid, and she was happy to help.

Ok, Lu didn't know I wanted to stay away from Reid. I just told her I needed a girl's night. I really didn't want to deal with all her questions. You have the right to avoid dealing with your feelings from time to time if you can. And I told Spencer Lu wasn't feeling so good, so I wanted to spend some time with her. He sounded disappointed ‘cos he was making plans for our weekend off but understood completely I needed to be with my friend.

See? Spencer made it so easy falling in love with him! He was so thoughtful it freaking hurt!

I couldn't fight the feeling anymore and rested my head on his shoulder. It felt he was waiting for me to make that move, ‘cos in a few seconds, his arm was wrapped around me protectively.

- "I know Lu needed you, but you missed a whole weekend of cuddling on this couch watching your favorite movies with me,"- Spencer whispered, bumping his head carefully against mine. I bit my lips and smiled, not taking my eyes away from the screen.

- "We do this pretty often"- that was all I could answer.

- "At least once a week for the last… thirteen-month two weeks, and… four days."

- "I love how precise you can be when it comes to our friendship, honey."

Calling it a friendship hurt me at that point, but it was what it was. Spencer chuckled and just nodded. We enjoyed our company in silence for a moment. His fingers drawing figures on my arm and my head resting on his shoulder, letting his smell invade me. It was heaven.

We were finally watching the movie… though what I really wanted was to watch a movie with Spencer instead of actually watching it. But that was the nature of our relationship. We were friends. Friends don't watch movies.

- "No way,"- I argued when his cellphone rang and interrupted our moment- "Please tell me we don't have a case."

- "We don't,"- he quickly answered and picked up the phone- "Hello? Hi… it's ok, tell me"- he didn't stand up or moved from me. He kept holding me tight against his body and finished his call by simply saying.

- "We can meet tomorrow at seven at work. I can help you with your test."- I hated those words immediately.

- "It's not a problem, see you tomorrow. Bye."

I was afraid to ask ‘cos I knew the answer. The knot on my stomach was the fair warning of what had just happened. That bitch had ruined our moment yet again.

- "What are you doing tomorrow at seven?"- I did my best to sound as casual as possible, but I knew that conversation might not end well. He hesitated. I could nearly hear his neurons struggling to find the correct answer to that question. Until he simply whispered:

- "Please don't get mad."

- "Why would I?"

- "‘Cos Ashley just called to ask me to help her study for a test…"

I took a deep breath and held it for a few seconds, doing my best to calm myself down at least a little before speaking.

- "I'm not mad, Spencer,"- I tried to lie as smoothly as possible. I even cut him a smile and looked into his hazel and confused eyes.

- "I know you don't like her, but I had offered to help in case she needed any… what?"

- "I'm not mad, really,"- I smiled again and turned to the screen- "We said we were not going to argue, and besides, she just called to ask you for help. That's not something to be mad about, right?"

Technically I wasn't mad. I was beyond furious.

- "Are you sure?"- he narrowed his eyes, baffled- "Not that I want you to be mad or something, but we just argued over her, and you said you felt invaded by her… so…"

- "Yes, but I don't wanna argue anymore. I don't want you to think I hate Seaver because I don't. And most of all, I don't want her to be the reason we fight. I don't wanna fight with you. Ever."

Spencer sighed, relieved, and smiled, pleased with my answer.

Spencer's point of view

Something felt off the following day when I walked into the bullpen and saw Ashley waiting for me by my desk with two cups of coffee. (Y/N) had said everything was ok, and I decided I wanted to believe her. But I had an awful feeling about everything that was going on.

- "Hi!"- Ashley smiled and handed me a cup- "Figured you might appreciate one of these for making you wake up earlier."

- "Thank you"- I smiled awkwardly and held the cup- "Are you ready?"

- "Yes, I brought all the notes from the class and my books…"- she set them on her desk and giggled as I went through her notes, sipping my cup- "I feel back in high school…"

- "Why?"

- "I wasn't the best student back then, and I always had to ask my classmates for help,"- I couldn't help but think of something (Y/N) had said the night before.

- "And are you a good student at the academy?"

- "Yes, I think. I'm not in the top three of my class, but I have good grades. I'm just not… a genius, like you."

Her eyes lingered on my face, and her cheeks blushed after a few seconds. I frowned, not getting why she was embarrassed. Was it just ‘cos she didn't have the same honorifics as I did?

- "I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified,"- I simply answered, remembering how many times in my life I had ever said something like that. Way too many, to be honest.

It was hard to focus on the subject when Seaver kept asking me personal questions every five minutes. She seemed more interested in knowing about my childhood in Las Vegas than learning about profiling and victimology.

- "Good morning, kids!"- I turned around and smiled at Morgan, so glad to see him I might have actually felt a little relieved- "What are you doing here so early?"

- "Hey! I was just helping Ashley with her test,"- I stood up and walked from her desk over his- "And about you?"

- "I have a meeting with Strauss in a while, and Sanderson's case didn't let me sleep. It was better to come here and start working than to keep on rolling on my bed. But I'm glad you are here. Wanna help me go through a few extra files?"

- "Of course!"- I left the notes I was holding on the closest desk and walked with Morgan to the conference room.

I considered our session with Seaver finished, mostly ‘cos for the last ten minutes, she had been asking about me. What I liked doing outside the BAU, favorite bands, hobbies, anything. I answered her questions and kept trying to push her to study. I didn't want her to blame me if she failed her test.

- "Hey, kid."- Morgan whispered after a few minutes and took a look around, just to make sure no one else was near. I looked at him confused ‘cos he was never that careful to say anything in the office.

- "Is everything ok?"

- "Yes?"- I answered, though it sounded like a question ‘cos I wasn't sure what he was talking about.

- "Are you excited to have Seaver on the team for the next month?"- I shrugged and kept reading the file in my hands- "Come on, Reid. She is clearly sweet to you."

- "I don't know what you are talking about."

- "She has a crush on you, kid."

- "No, she doesn't!"

- "Come on! Are you blind?"- I stared at Morgan, not getting what he was talking about- "Man, Seaver gives you loving eyes even when we are on the field!"

- "She does not!"- I knew I was blushing. I hated those kinds of conversations, and Morgan always made me feel awkward when he hinted I should flirt with a girl or just talk to them.

- "And I would appreciate it if you didn't say anything like that ever again."

- "What's the matter, kid? You don't think she is pretty?"

- "I don't look at her that way!"- I buried my head in a file and tried not to notice how he scanned my whole face, looking for micro expressions.

- "I see. Are you afraid (Y/N) might get jealous?"- Morgan chuckled at his words and tapped on my back a few times, making me flinch- "Relax, man. I'm just kidding!"

- "I don't like those jokes, Derek. Really."

Morgan kept his eyes on me a little longer and nodded. I did my best not to show how I really felt, but somehow, I failed miserably.

- "You know, kid, it would be much easier if you just told (Y/N) how you feel about her,"- Derek's voice was soft and even more concerned than I thought he could be. I nearly shook when I heard him, so I failed my mission of remaining stoic.

- "Reid, it's ok. There's nothing wrong with having feelings for her."

- "I don't… like talking about this,"- I whispered and closed the file- "Can we just focus on work, please?"- Derek nodded and stayed quiet for a few seconds. But I knew he wasn't done yet.

- "Reid, listen. I know you are not really fond of sharing how you feel with us, I know you share almost everything that happens in your life with (Y/N), and as your friend, I've always felt glad and relieved to know you have her. But if there's something you can't tell her, and you need to talk to someone, you can count on me. You know that, right?"

I nodded and looked at him. That conversation took me back to the year I was using and had to keep it secret from my friends. I knew I could count on Morgan if anything happened, but I really wasn't comfortable sharing my thoughts, feelings, and fears with people. (Y/N) made it so easy. Was it ‘cos I loved her? I just always felt I could tell her anything. That had never happened to me before with anyone.

- "Morgan, Strauss was looking for you,"- Rossi walked into the room holding a cup of coffee and stared at us, raising an eyebrow- "Everything ok?"

- "Yes, we were just going through some files,"- Morgan stood up and grabbed the case folder- "I'll be right back."

- "I'll finish reading all these,"- I said and pointed at the box filled with more files. Morgan nodded and walked away.

- "Do you need any help?"- Seaver walked over that second and smiled at me. I stood up and shook my head.

- "Thanks, but I'm basically done. I'll just go make myself another cup of coffee."

- "I'll go with you!"- she smiled and waited for me by the door. Rossi looked at me and raised an eyebrow. I just cut him a straight smile and walked to the kitchenette, followed closely by Ashley.

(Y/N) walked into the bullpen that minute. I watched her as she opened the glass door and took out her jacket. It felt like the time passed in slow motion as she walked. I couldn't help it, I just smiled as soon as our eyes crushed, and for a few seconds, life was perfect. Just to know she was there, smiling at me made everything worth living.

See why I couldn't tell anyone how I was feeling? They would make fun of me. Morgan would never understand the agony and the dimension of my love for her. He would just tease me. I wonder if he had ever actually been in love 'till that point in life.

I didn't want anyone to know what was happening to me ‘cos I was sure they would make fun of me, and that was the last thing I needed at that moment. So I did what I knew best: I locked it all inside and waited for it to burn me alive.

- "Good morning, chipmunk!"- I stood by (Y/N)'s side and smiled as she left her things on her desk and turned to me. She just looked into my eyes, and my brain turned into mush.

- "Good morning, honey bunny. Did you sleep well? You look tired."

- "Yeah, I just got up extra early today to help Seaver, and now I was helping Derek with some files."

- "Do you need a hand?"

- "Sure!"- I didn't even analyze my answer. I just spit the words, thinking it would be amazing to spend some time with my friend, working together.

- "Hi (Y/N), how are you?"- that until her face changed completely when Seaver waved at her- "Spencer, do you want me to make your coffee?"- I froze and turned to her in silence.

- "No, thank you. I'll… just… wait a little before having another one. I just had my third cup."

- "Three cups in already"- (Y/N) narrowed her eyes and turned to her desk, giving me her back- "How long have you been awake?"

- "Not as long as Morgan, I tell you that,"- I pointed at him, walking out of Strauss's office and heading back to our conference room.

- "Let's help him, then."

(Y/N) walked quickly, and I followed closely. I wished I hadn't said no to that coffee. I really needed one to go through that morning.

During that morning, Derek questioned Sanderson again and finally took him and Rossi back to his house, trying to trigger any memory that might help us crack the case. Meanwhile, the rest of the team and I stayed back in the office, repeatedly going through the case files. So far, all we knew is that a team had attacked Sanderon's home and framed him for the murder of his wife and daughter.

The whole day, I focused on work ‘cos it's my favorite escape, and clearly, there was something more important to think of than whatever was going on with my life. But my head was killing me. The migraines were starting to get more intense, and I think they got worse the more thinking I gave to my relationship with (Y/N).

- "It sounds like we need to profile a dormant killer"- Ashle's voice surprised me when I was pouring myself a cup of fresh coffee in the kitchenette.

- "A very lucky one. He was essentially given a gift, a patsy in the form of Don Sanderson, and he'll do anything to protect that story."- I answered, thinking I didn't want to be in Sanderon's shoes, trying to clear my name of something I hadn't done.

- "When someone has a secret this big, everything becomes a lie."

Somehow, Seaver's words hit me. I'm sure she didn't mean to strike a nerve, but she did. I had been in love with my best friend for too long, and now it was starting to affect my life. I didn't want it to get in the way of work, and we were at work most of our time together. But there was nothing I could do about it. I just had to keep on faking everything was normal.

- "He'll most likely be pathological,"- I nearly choked at my own words as I tried to shake away the thoughts from my head.

- "So, we're looking for a liar in D. C. I thought we were trying to narrow this down."- Ashley tried to joke and waited for my reaction but didn't get anything. Instead, I just cut her a straight smile and walked away.

By the end of the night, Morgan had gotten the unsub. But I was still a mess. It had been the longest day in weeks, not just ‘cos I had barely slept the night before, but because I was overthinking everything that happened around me. It was exhausting.

- "Are you coming, Batsy?"- (Y/N) asked me and grabbed her bag after putting on her coat. I stood from my desk and nodded.

- "Yes, ma chère."

- "Where are you guys going tonight?"- Derek asked and smiled at us- "No. Don't tell me, planning this year's matching Comic-Con costumes"- I chuckled and probably blushed, busted.

- "We already settled those, Derek. We are way ahead of schedule this year,"- (Y/N) answered and stuck out her tongue to him.

- "(Y/N), can you give me a second before you go?"- Prentiss stood up and smiled at my friend, who just nodded and walked with her to the conference room. Derek and Seaver looked at me.

- "What?"

- "Do you know what's that about?"- Morgan questioned me.

- "I have no idea."

(Y/N)'s point of view

- "Please don't freak out,"- Emily smiled and turned to me after she closed the door behind her back- I just needed to clear the air a little bit between us.

- "What? Why? Is there something wrong?"

- "I don't know, I just feel you have been acting weird lately, and I needed to know if it has something to do with me supervising Seaver."

I nearly gasped. Not ‘cos I felt insulted but ‘cos I felt caught. I knew I hadn't been subtle about my feelings for Seaver. I just didn't want them to get in the middle of work.

- "I haven't been weird with you, Emily, and I don't think I've been acting strange."

- "Come on, you don't like Ashley, and I offered to supervise her while she works with us."

- "Yes, but neither of those has anything to do with me and you. We are friends, Emily."

- "I know, and I wanna honor that friendship, (Y/N). I love working with you. I just want you to know I'm not… I just… I'm trying to help Seaver start her career."

- "I understand that. We are ok,"- I tried to reassure her, but I knew she could read between my bullshit.

- "Do you think you could try to be a little bit nicer with her?"

- "Nicer?"

- "Yes, (Y/N). She is making an effort to get along with the team, and you've been giving her the cold shoulder since day one." -I crossed my arms on my chest, obviously annoyed and defensive.

- "I have been friendly with her, Emily. I just don't like her, and you can't force me to be her friend."

In my defense, in my mind, that argument didn't sound as childish as it did when I said it out loud.

- "Don't be selfish! Just because you are jealous, you can't deprive her of the opportunity of a lifetime with this team."

Emily's words were knives against my ego and nearly destroyed my facade. I stared into her eyes and wondered how to get out of that situation without hurting my friend. I could pretend I didn't know what she was talking about, but we both knew that was bullshit. I could actually try to tell her how I felt, but it was so humiliating I refused to open up. So instead, I just nodded and smiled at her.

- "I'm sorry that's how you see me. I'll try to be a better version of myself tomorrow,"- and needless to say, I turned around and left.

- "(Y/N), please wait,"- but I didn't stop walking. I refused to continue talking about Seaver with anyone. I refused to deal with feelings or the real world.

- "Everything ok?"- Spencer asked me the second he saw me appear by his side.

- "Yes,"

- "You are blushing. Did you and Prentiss argue?"

- "No, honey. We didn't argue. She just wanted to check on me ‘cos she was worried I was mad at her. But that's all."- Spencer just nodded and looked at me in silence.- "Why don't we just go home and forget about today, honey?"

Easier said than done.

So Seaver was getting under my skin. And it was getting harder to control. That week was hell, and I didn't want to show it. Eventually, I talked with Emily again, and I tried to explain to her I wasn't being mean with Seaver. I just didn't like her. And though I gave Emily my word to be friendlier with Ashley, the circumstances weren't really helping.

Things didn't get any better than Friday night. No, if anything, that was the night that made it all worse. Prentiss, JJ, and I got together at Garcia's house and had a few drinks before leaving for Anderson's birthday. I was making my biggest effort to have fun and ease my mind. Spencer said he wasn't sure he'd make it ‘cos he was tired, and automatically I almost turned out the whole deal, but Penelope literally dragged me to her house and put a beer in my hand.

- "You, my young lady, are going to put some makeup on, a hot dress, and we are going to party!"

- "But PG, I'm not…"- but she didn't let me out of it. Instead, she shushed me and raised an eyebrow, looking pretty convincing.

- "No "but." You are going. End of the conversation."

So she dragged me to the bar, along with Prentiss and JJ, who had left Will with little Henry to join us for what was promised to be one epic girl's night.

Anderson was so happy to see us. He was a sweetheart who was always willing to help us. I knew technically he didn't work at the BAU, but he was always there whenever we needed him. We all felt he was part of the team.

- "Sonny!!"- I yelled and hugged him tight

- "I'm so glad you girls made it!!"- and his smile was priceless- "JJ!!"- he actually yelled when he saw her and ran to give her a triple bear hug.

- "Grant Anderson!! I can't believe it's really you!!"

- "I've missed you so much!! How's Henry?"

- "So big!! I feel I haven't been out with friends in so long!"- JJ looked around, and her face kept lighting up as she recognized more friends and acquaintances from Quantico. I looked around and recognized Morgan already flirting with a woman at the other side of the bar.

- "Looks like chocolate thunder knows how to keep himself busy,"- I joked, and Garcia turned immediately.

- "Have you ever seen him shirtless?"- she asked in a lower voice and leaned a little closer to me, just to make sure no one would listen- "I'm sure it's illegal looking so good in real life."

I laughed and turned to see Prentiss walk to the bar to get us the first round of drinks. Ok, I'll admit it, I was having a great time. I know I didn't want to go at first, but spending time with my work friends and not just with Spencer was refreshing. Not that I didn't do fun things with the rest of the team, but my relationship with Spencer, I mean the friendship that pretty much looked like a relationship, consumed most of my time. But I just loved being with Reid more than anything.

But one night without him wasn't going to be the end of the world. Right?

Right.

Anderson and I danced and laughed. It was all very innocent. And though I've never considered myself a hot chick or whatever, a few guys asked if they could get me drinks, and I kindly declined. I wasn't looking for a one-night stand or anything. I just wanted to have fun with my friends.

- "And where's Reid?"- Anderson asked as we reached our table, where Prentiss and JJ were catching up and laughing.

- "Home, he said he was tired."

- "And? When are you two going to come clean about your relationship? You know, having the confirmation of your romance would be the best birthday present you could ever give me."

- "Grant Anderson, you nosy bastard!!"- I hit his arm and heard his laughter- "You know we are not dating!"

- "Come on!! I mean it! You have to get together! You are like the FBI sweethearts!!"

- "Shut your face!"- Anderson laughed even harder and took a look around the bar

- "So, if you are not dating Spencer, I have a friend who asked about you."

- "Who? What friend? Is he here?"- Garcia shouted question after question as she had overheard the whole conversation and even moved closer.

- "His name is James. He saw you on the news a few months ago, at a press conference with Rossi, and has been asking about you ever since."

I frowned and looked at Garcia, who was wide-eyed staring at Anderson. I had no idea what was going on. It was bizarre.

- "No, thank you?"- I whispered, not even sure of what I should answer at that- "I'm very flattered, Grant, but… I'm really not looking for someone right now."

- "You are not?"- Garcia asked me, and I just shook my head.

- "No, I have too much going on in my life, with work and… well… what we do…"

- "Really?"- Anderson sounded a little disappointed- "Well, in case you change your mind, James is…"

- "(Y/N)? Can I talk to you for a second?"- Garcia grabbed my arm and crawled me to a side of the bar.

- "What? What is it?"

- "Munchkin, you know I love you."

- "Yes, I love you too, PG."

- "That's why I feel like I need to be honest with you, ‘cos you've always been so sweet, and we've known each other for years now, and I feel like if I don't tell you this, you are never going to forgive me."- Penelope was nearly hyperventilating as she spoke.

- "Ok, what is it? You are scaring me."

- "You have to tell Reid how you feel."

- "What?"

- "He has to know! You have to tell him!"

- "I don't wanna talk about what, Penelope"- I tried to walk away from her, but she stopped me, grabbed my arm, and pulled me back.

- "No, (Y/N). He loves you, I'm not a profiler, I don't even play one on tv, but I am sure what I see in his eyes when he looks at you is love… ‘cos it's the same you have when you look at him!"

- "Son of a bitch!!"- the words escaped my lips as my heart nearly left my chest.

- "No, (Y/N)!"- but Garcia lost my attention that second, ‘cos all I could see was Spencer Walter Reid walking into the bar and Ashley Seaver hanging from his arm.

- "What do you want me to tell him, Garcia? To have fun with his new girlfriend?"- I pointed at the door, and her jaw nearly hit the floor.

- "Ok, no. There has to be a reasonable explanation for that!"

- "Yes, but Spencer being in love with me is not the explanation. I'm gonna get a drink."

Spencer's point of view

I was surprised to get Ashley's phone call that night. When my phone rang, I was ready to go to bed. My head was killing me. I had already scheduled an appointment with the doctor for some exams. I was starting to have a bad feeling about what those headaches really were, and I was too scared to tell anyone what was going on. Not even (Y/N).

Actually, of all people, she was the one I wanted to keep in the dark. Why? ‘Cos ever since we met she had taken care of me, I didn't think it was fair. She had taken me into her life and given me a place in it. And sometimes, I felt I was a burden. She helped me overcome all of my traumas and even my drug addiction. She introduced me to her best friends and made me part of her life. (Y/N) had taken trips with me to Las Vegas just to see my mom, ‘cos she knew it was hard for me to do it on my own. If it hadn't been for her, I would have probably spent over a year without visiting her. Now, we took a weekend to see mom every few months.

Why would I trouble her with some headaches? It wasn't fair.

When Ashley called, for a moment, I thought it might be (Y/N), asking me to pick her up. But no. It wasn't her that time.

- "Hey Spence, I'm sorry to bother you, but… are you at Anderson's party?"

- "No, actually, I'm in my house."

- "Why? I thought you were invited too."

- "Yeah, I know, and I was, but I'm kind of tired, and I wanted to come home and get some rest. Why? Are you at the party?"

- "No, but I was getting ready to go. But now I feel kind of awkward asking you."

- "What? What is it?"

- "I just… wanted to know if you could come with me. I'm so sorry, Spence, I didn't know you were tired. I just… I wanted to go to the party, but I feel kind of silly going alone. I wanted to ask Prentiss, but she left with (Y/N) and Garcia, and I felt so awkward asking…"

I wanted to groan, roll in my bed and hide under my pillow. But Ashley was the new girl, and she deserved to have some fun.

- "Don't worry, I'll take you there,"- I know I whispered my answer ‘cos I didn't really want to do it, but somehow I felt it was my duty.

- "Really?!"- and by the excitement in Ashley's voice, it was clear that was what she wanted to hear.

- "I'll pick you up in half an hour, ok?"

- "Thank you so much, Spence!!"

But when I walked into the bar, I knew I had made a mistake. I felt it in my guts. The same intuition I never followed in my personal life, only on the field.

I quickly looked around as Ashley held on to my arm tightly and walked into the bar with a big smile. I soon found Prentiss and JJ talking at a table filled with empty glasses, and my heart jumped inside my chest at the warm, familiar feeling that my friends gave me. I missed JJ very much. And not just as a team member but as a friend who had been taken away from us. (Y/N) always said I didn't know how to deal with change, neither did she, and the shifts in the team always affected me.

Soon I saw Morgan too, talking with Anderson and some other agents. Garcia had to be close then, but I couldn't see her or (Y/N) anywhere around.

- "Come on! Let's get a drink!"- Ashley said and crawled me to the bar.

- "I don't drink and drive"- I said, and she pouted.

- "Come on! You are no fun! Just one!"

- "No, just water. Thanks,"- I turned and scanned the place. Everybody was there, and they seemed to be having fun. Penelope waved and walked to me suddenly. She cut me a short smile and grabbed my arm.

- "Hey, what the hell are you doing here?"

- "I didn't want to come, but Ashley insisted and…"

- "Hi!"- Ashley appeared by our side and handed me a bottle of water- "I'm so excited to be here! We really needed to decompress after everything that happened this week, right Garcia?"

Penelope stared at us, trying to formulate an answer. I could see her making her bet to say something, but she just didn't. Instead, she just turned around and walked away.

- "Is she ok?"- I didn't know how to answer that, ‘cos Penelope's reaction surprised me. Ashley just looked around and grabbed my arm again.

- "Come on, Spencer! Let's dance!"

- "No, I don't… dance, sorry."

Lucky for me, Prentiss showed up and invited us to sit with her at her table. I don't know if she noticed I was uncomfortable, but I was glad to see her. Being in that bar made me feel pretty awkward and exposed.

I had never been much of a party person. I wasn't used to bars and gatherings until I joined the BAU. When I first met Derek, he tried to take me out a few times and be my wingman. It's obvious he failed at that mission. Meeting people at a bar is the most complicated equation I could ever try to solve. It doesn't work for me, no matter how hard Derek pushed me to do it. He said I had to rely on what made me feel comfortable. But no. It wasn't that I couldn't meet people. It was that I didn't want to meet anyone once I met the woman of my dreams. Even when I knew she could never be mine.

When (Y/N) came along, she started hosting these fun "dinner parties" with Frank, Lu, and Mikey, which changed everything. It was the first time I was hanging out with people my age doing things I actually liked doing. It wasn't about drinking or picking girls in a bar. It was about playing Jenga, or charades, eating pizza, and talking about movies and sometimes even books.

(Y/N) said her friends considered me part of the gang, which was all I ever wanted to hear. That I belonged. It's kind of sad when you think about it, but I don't care. I had never felt like I belonged anywhere, and they made me feel like I was one of them. They took me to their rock shows, and I jumped along with the crowd, knowing I wasn't an outcast there. I was with my friends.

You don't know how good that made me feel. And for years, they were my social comfort and cocoon. Then, when Rossi joined the BAU again, he started hosting fancy dinner parties at his house, and I got to hang out with the whole team without being at a bar, pushed to meet people. And it was so good. (Y/N) always said Rossi's arrival had a cohesive effect on us. Not because he brought us together, but the circumstances of his arrival and everything that happened that first year.

This team is no stranger to trauma, and that's a fact. I think Rossi's dinner parties gave us a space to be ourselves, relax, have a few drinks and enjoy our time together. I think that's when we stepped from being friends to be family.

And I hadn't had one before.

I hugged JJ tight as soon as I saw her smiling at me. I hadn't seen her ever since her goodbye party, over two months before, but we had talked on the phone a few times.

- "I've missed you so much, Spence!!"- she said and held my face with both hands- "You and (Y/N) owe me two babysit nights,"- and I laughed, thinking we promised we'd take care of Henry so she and Will could have a date, but we were called for a case.

- "Wait! It was one night!"- I argued, chuckling- "Why is it two nights now?"

- "‘Cos I lost a very exclusive reservation due to the two of you."

- "Technically, it wasn't our fault, we were called in for a case..."

I smiled and sat next to JJ, and Prentiss sat next to me. Ashley stood by the table and smiled at JJ. Right, they didn't even know each other.

- "It's very nice to meet you, Agent Jareau. The team talks very highly of you,"- she shook JJ's hand and smiled.

- "Ashley, right? Prentiss was just telling me you will be taking your remedial training at the BAU. Congratulations, it's a fantastic team to work with."

- "Thank you,"- I took a look around, still trying to find my best friend around. But it seemed useless, and I was starting to feel worried.

- "Where's (Y/N)?"- I had to ask.

- "She was with Anderson a minute ago,"- Penelope said and looked around- "I am going to look for her and bring her here in a second. I'll be right back."

And so, she was gone.

Prentiss and I pretty much interrogated JJ about her new job and the new team she worked with at the pentagon. I sipped my water and half-listened her answer, ‘cos most of my head was trying to register what was going on around me. No, actually, I was trying to find (Y/N). Penelope had been gone for half an hour looking for her, and I was starting to think something weird was going on. Besides, my head was killing me, and all I wanted was to go home. But I hadn't seen JJ in weeks, and I couldn't waste a chance like that.

Ashley talked with Prentiss too, and every once in a while, she tried to engage in conversation with me. But to be honest, I couldn't really concentrate on anything. I just wanted to know (Y/N) was alright.

- "Excuse me,"- I stood up slowly and looked at my friends- "I'm going to the bathroom, be right back."

- "Can you get us another round on our way back?"- Prentiss asked and smiled guiltily.

- "Sure."

- "Do you need help?"- Ashley tried to stand up, but Emily stopped her.

- "He got it, don't worry."

So I was left on my own. I walked around the bar. In my mind, I kept telling myself I was "looking for the bathroom," but I knew very well I was indeed trying to find (Y/N). I had been in that bar for an hour, and I still hadn't seen her. I was worried.

I walked around the bar and found Anderson. He seemed to be a little shocked to see me there but smiled and hugged me. It was weird hugging people, still. But Anderson was part of the team. It always felt like it. We had known each other for years, and somehow it was like he was in the background of our daily basics.

- "Have you seen (Y/N)?"- I asked him, and he widened his eyes- "What?"

- "Yeah, she's right there, actually… "- Grant Anderson pointed and turned around- "Later, Reid."

- "Bye"- I didn't even look at him. I just turned and looked around to see (Y/N).

But my best friend didn't notice me. She was too busy kissing some guy.

I stood in front of her, not knowing what to do. Her eyes were closed, and her arms were around his neck, so clearly, she wasn't in distress, and no matter how badly I wanted to take her from him, I just couldn't.

For a minute, I couldn't believe my eyes. I just stood there and stared at (Y/N), trying to understand what was going on. I always knew she wasn't meant to be mine, but I had never gotten such a brutal reminder. Not even when she was dating Paul. Watching her kissing someone else was shocking. The way that man put his hands on her waist and held her close to him, just like I always dreamt of doing, was painful.

Painful. That was the only word I can explain how it felt.

I stood there for a minute or so. I really don't know how long it was, but it felt long enough to burn in my memory everything I needed to torture myself with for the rest of my life. I stepped back after a minute. It might have been longer; I really can't recall. And all I managed to do was to walk out of the bar and reach my car.

I opened the door and slammed it as I sat behind the wheel. I wanted to cry and yell. But I didn't do either of those. Instead, I stayed still, staring at the nothing in front of me, trying to erase that fresh memory from my head. But it was impossible. (Y/N) was making out with some guy inside that bar, and there was nothing I could do to stop her. So I did the only thing I could do at that minute. I started the car and got the fuck out of there.

–

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Next update: June 23th, 2021

[elizabeethan]

Watch the Sunlight Fade: 8 / 17

Emma Swan finds out that her boyfriend has been hiding something from her: he’s in a gang and trying to get out. Reluctantly, she decides to support him, sticking it out with him until they have enough money to flee to Florida. All she has to do is wait and ignore that feeling in her gut that something is seriously wrong. With the help of a kind and handsome stranger, she just might make it out alive.

Or, alternate summary: I’m horrible at summaries, please just read it.

Something of a cross between a What Still Remains AU and a Sons of Anarchy AU.

A/N: Things might be starting to come together this week! Let me know your predictions.

This chapter talks extremely briefly and ambiguously of Emma not exactly wanting to have sex with Neal. Also, there is a discussion of Killian’s semi-violent past. Nothing is detailed, but let me know if you need more information or anything!! 

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The days turn into weeks, although Emma can’t help but feel as though time is dragging her along mercilessly. Nothing has changed since she found out about Neal, how he’s the brother of the leader of The Lost Boys. Nothing, aside from her feelings of safety and security, of confidence in her relationship, being completely shattered. 

 Every night, she fights off the desperation to walk across the hall and join Killian in his bed, letting his strong arms consume her and blanket her with a sense of ease and contentment. Every night, she fights with herself as she crawls into bed with Neal, a man she thought she loved, and forces herself to put on an act of affection towards him. She forces herself to lie back and accept his convoluted attempts at showing her that he loves her, knowing that he couldn’t possibly. If he loved her, he would never have lied to her. If he loves her, he would let her go. 

 She also fights with herself through the anger she feels, directed inward rather than at anyone else. Sure, she’s mad at Neal for what he’s done, what he’s putting her through, but at the end of the day, she’s the fool to let herself be put in this position. It’s her fault. She should have seen through his lies from the moment she met him, but she was too desperate for love and family and acceptance. He knew that, too, and he exploited her weaknesses like she meant nothing to him. 

 It drives her mad to not know what he’s after. She’s hardly the most skilled person at finding people who don’t want to be found, so why he feels the need to target her specifically, she can’t say. It could be argued that, in some perplexing, psychotic way, he thinks he loves her, but she knows now that this isn’t love. It can’t be. 

 Lying at his side, wide awake through her inability to sleep, she can’t seem to shut her mind off. Each time she closes her eyes, she feels terror at the memories burned behind her lids. Every time she closes her eyes, she sees Neal on top of her, despite her resolve to squeeze her eyes shut each time he decides he wants to be with her. Usually, she’s able to go to another place, letting thoughts of the beach or her happy future serve as a distraction of her fear, but sometimes she can’t ignore the feeling of his rough fingertips burning her skin. 

Sometimes, when she’s in Neal’s arms and struggling to get past the feelings that come along with being with him, she thinks of Killian. Not necessarily in a way of longing for him-- not because she wishes she was with him instead, although she can only assume it would be more pleasurable-- but because of the comfort that he always brings her. Being with him is like being embraced by warmth and safety itself. It’s like the rest of the world turns off, and all that’s on her mind is the soothing way his arms wrap around her and the gentle rise and fall of his chest against her cheek. She doesn’t have to worry when she’s with him. She only has to think about how good it feels to be in his arms. 

 And she’s noticed his physique, too. It would be difficult not to. She noticed that first night, when he lifted his sweatshirt off and pulled his t-shirt up with it. She noticed the other day when he visited her in her cave of an office, leaning his shoulder against the door frame with his arms crossed, muscles bulging out of his sleeves and a tempting smirk coloring his lips as he teased her over the dinosaur of a computer she was working on. She notices the way he looks with almost everything he does, and she knows it's a dangerous game that she’s playing. 

 It’s not like she never found Neal attractive. But knowing what she knows now, she can’t help but to feel slightly nauseated every time she sees his face. She’s got to get out of this. 

 ~~~~

 “Since you did such a good job with the last one, I have another little task for you,” Peter says, his voice teasing and his smirk unsettling. 

 Emma works hard to maintain her composure as she sits straight up in her seat, one she was finally awarded after weeks of standing awkwardly before the group sat at the table. Today, when she walked into the daunting conference room, Peter invited her to sit beside him, beside Neal, and has been leaning towards her in a way that she knows is meant to appear polite, but holds a threatening undertone.

 “Okay,” she agrees, trying to make her voice sound confident and fighting off the fear that never seems to go away. 

 He turns from her to Neal and remarks, “she really has begun to come into her own, hasn’t she?” 

 “I guess,” he shrugs, and a part of her feels offended at his nonchalance. Despite her strong desire to be anywhere but here, she thinks she’s done a pretty nice job of trying to fit in. Ever since Gold spilled the beans a few weeks ago about Neal’s status in the club, she’s held it together fairly well on the outside, with the exception of her initial breakdown. 

 There’s only one person she truly feels comfortable breaking down in front of. Only one person who she really trusts. 

 She hasn’t told Neal that she's found out his true identity. She and Killian have talked about it at length, sometimes able to spend time alone together especially when Neal leaves, and they’ve agreed that it’s for the best to keep her discovery under wraps. Gold’s subtle drop that Neal is his son and brother to Peter was purposeful, and she can’t let him come out on top. She knows, she’s terrified, but she’ll maintain her composure. For whatever reason, Neal doesn’t want her to know, so she’ll keep playing dumb. 

 “Who do you want me to find?” she asks, wanting nothing more than to prevent Neal from saying anything else casually offensive. His small digs at her serve a purpose, she now knows; to bring her down as far and as quietly as he can. 

 “This one may be a bit more of a challenge; a member from a rival gang. While Graham was more of a nomad, this man has ties to the Kings of Elsinore and is better protected. I want you to find out everything you can on him.” 

 “Okay,” she nods assuredly. “Well, I'll take whatever you have on him and get to work, then.” 

 Before she can move from her seat, Peter’s hand is on her wrist, oppressively holding her still. “Not so fast. There’s someone I’d like you to officially meet. Call in Hook.” 

 A man Neal knows, Walsh, she thinks, stands from his chair and walks towards the door, summoning someone inside. She has to stop her jaw from hitting the floor when she sees who. 

 “You two seem to have met casually, but I’d like you to officially meet Killian Jones. He’s gotten himself into a touch of trouble and, as punishment, will be helping you with whatever you need until this man is located.” 

 She gulps, anxiety setting in again despite how hard she’s been trying to keep it at bay. She promised herself she would be strong, refusing to let them get to her, to let them see her squirm. She will keep her promise to herself. “Okay,” she murmurs, forcing herself to peel her gaze from Killian’s. She can’t help but wonder what he’s done to get into trouble with Peter. She selfishly hopes they weren’t caught without her knowledge. 

 ~~~~

 “What happened?” she begs desperately once the door to her small office is shut, Killian ushering her into the room before practically slamming it. “What are you in trouble for? Killian, please tell me they don’t--” 

 “Nothing like that,” he hisses, stepping towards her. With a soft, gentle voice only just above a whisper, he says, “love, you have to stay calm. You did phenomenally pretending we don’t know each other well, but we have to keep up the ruse.” 

 “Sorry,” she whispers. “I know, I just… what happened?”

 “Nothing, love, I promise. I only refused to go on a trip with them last week and Peter feared I wasn’t dedicated to the club’s cause.” 

 “You did?” she asks in surprise. When Neal told her that he wasn’t dedicated, she forced herself to believe him. When Killian says it, she doesn't even consider doubting him. 

 “Aye. Told them I had pressing matters to attend to.” 

 She cocks her head suspiciously and asks, “what were the pressing matters?” 

 “The Mummy Returns was on TV, remember? We watched it together.” 

 She can’t help the smile that breaks across her face, a snort escaping her throat despite her best efforts as she shakes her head and feels a blush creeping up her neck and pinkening her cheeks. “You’re dumb,” she says, and she feels like a child in a playground with a school crush. 

 “Well,” he shrugs, giving her a beaming smile. “Here, love. I’ve got the information we have so far. Time to start digging.” 

 A part of her almost wants to take her time, content to sit in the small office with Killian sitting beside her for quite some time. No one would suspect a thing, what with Peter already telling her that this guy would be harder to find; it’s the perfect excuse to soak in all of the comfort and happiness that Killian brings her despite her circumstances. But she knows they have to keep up appearances so as to avoid being caught in their elicit friendship, so she’ll work at a normal pace and hope no one notices that her smile is genuine rather than the forced one she gives Neal. 

 James Spencer is certainly a hard man to find. If she didn’t already know that he was linked to the Kings of Elsinore, she would be lost, as the man seems entirely enigmatic in nature. He seems like a ghost, her research pointing her absolutely nowhere, but Peter insists that he’s got ties to this rival club, despite her finding no evidence to support his claim. 

 She groans after a few hours, dropping her head to the desk as Killian continues to bounce a tennis ball off the wall in his boredom. It certainly is a punishment for him; the fact that he has to sit here and watch her find nothing is likely eating him alive. “It’s only been a few hours, love, you’ll find something soon,” he tries to console. Her frustration wins out, though. 

 “This is stupid.”

 “Aye.”

 “Are all of these stupid gangs this hard to navigate around?” 

 “Aye, I'd assume so. Although, I've never been a bounty hunter.” 

 She rolls her eyes, picking her head up and glaring. “I wasn’t a bounty hunter. I was a bail bondsperson.” 

 “That’s different?” 

 She holds her hands out, requesting the ball from him and catching it when he tosses it, only to throw it back at him with too much aggression. He yelps and laughs at her too loudly, and she can’t help but smile in response. She settles back into her chair after the short reprieve and sighs. 

 “How can I find someone who doesn’t want to be found if I know absolutely nothing about the environment he lives in?” 

 He hums in agreement, nodding and remarking, “you need an inside man.” 

 “No, I just need to know how a fucking motorcycle gang works,” she grumbles. It’s been a confusing few weeks, and she realizes that, while she’s gotten a few small bits of information, she still has no idea what the club’s actual purpose is. “Like… why even bother having one?” 

 He gives her a soft smile, standing from his chair and dragging it closer to her. “Are you sure that’s what this is about?” 

 “What?” she asks indignantly, giving him a look that she seriously hopes conveys how annoyed she is. 

 “Your little tantrum, love,” he teases. “Is it really about not knowing enough about how gangs work? Or is it, perhaps, more about your need to know everything about a situation in order to convince yourself that you’re safe?” 

 With another glare shot his way, she drops her jaw in surprise and shakes her head. “What the hell do you know?” 

 He smirks. “I know a lot more than you think. You’re a bit of an open book, love. And I’ve known you long enough now.” 

 “To what, psychoanalyze me?” 

 “I may have considered studying psychology, had I gone to university,” he laughs. “I know you’re scared, and I'm beginning to realize that not knowing what’s going to happen, or what’s happening without you knowing, is probably feeding that fear.”

 With another heaving sigh, she drops her head back down, resting it on her arms and nodding. “You’re right,” she concedes, although part of her wishes he wasn’t. It’s true, though, being so in the dark about everything is making her feel weak. 

 His hand lands on her shoulder, staying there for a moment before he gently and slowly scratches his fingertips against her skin and pulls away. “I can tell you what I know, if that’ll help.” 

 She perks up, lifting her head and recalling a conversation from weeks ago in which he told her that his brother was an influential member of the club. “Yes,” she says, and why she didn’t think to ask earlier, she doesn’t know. 

 He gives her a nod and another one of his encouraging smiles, the one that always makes her heart skip a beat, and clears his throat. “What I know is that Neal is older, but Peter is in charge. From what I gather, and I was never privy to much, Neal went off on his own for a while and Peter took over everything. Gold’s always seemed a bit more… hesitant around Peter, but I almost suspect that he favors Neal. Either way, Peter was running things behind the scenes for quite some time before Neal left. When he came back, it was with you on his arm and with Peter happily leading, refusing to give up his spot. No one argued with him.”

 She nods, but it doesn’t tell her much. She’s always known that Neal is more of a follower, happy to do whatever he can to impress his friends. The fact that he willingly gave up what seems to be his birthright doesn’t really surprise her. 

 “So what are they doing when they go away on their trips?”

 “Usually seeking out merchandise. They deal in stolen goods, mostly watches and the like. Typically, a trip is a heist of some kind. A jewelry store, antique shop… sometimes even banks with safe deposit boxes.” 

 Emma looks down to her own wrist, Killian’s gaze following closely behind, and notes the watch she wears. The one that Neal gave her after one of his trips. She shudders and moves to take it off. 

 His hand stops her, looking into her eyes deeply and shaking his head. “Keep it,” he murmurs. “We can’t let them know that you know any of this.”

 “Why?” she asks in a whisper. “Why is it so bad if I know?”

 “I don’t know,” he shakes his head again. “But if Neal hasn’t told you, there’s a reason for it.”

 She nods in understanding, letting her heart rate slow as his hand remains on her wrist, moving down to the top of her hand. She wants to wrap her fingers around his, but she knows she shouldn’t. “Can I ask something about you?”

 “Of course.”

 “Why do they call you Hook?”

 His eyes drop from hers, glancing down at their joined hands, and she watches his brows knit together tightly. She feels his grip on her hand tighten, and despite both of them knowing it’s a bad idea, his fingers weave with hers and he squeezes her hand. She squeezes back. 

 “There are things about my past that… that when I think about telling you, I become…” he sighs, unable to finish his thought. 

 “Killian,” she whispers, “I already know you’re in a gang. Can it really be that bad?”

 “Aye,” he answers immediately, his eyes meeting her own in a desperate attempt to convey to her something she can’t quite read. “I’m not… a good man.”

 “Of course you are.”

 “No. Maybe I’ve never thrown knives at a woman I’m supposed to love, but I’ve certainly… I mean…”

 “Killian.” Her grip on his hand, the one she should release, tightens. “Whatever happened… you’re not that person. You’re good. I know bad people and I pegged you as good the second I saw you.”

 It’s as if he can’t meet her gaze, too ashamed of whatever it is that he’s done. Too fearful of what will happen if she finds out. He witnessed her finding out that Neal has been lying to her, and she wonders if he fears a similar response now. 

 “I don’t-- it’s silly,” he laughs. “I just… I don’t want to disappoint you.” 

 “You can’t,” she whispers. After everything he’s done for her, everything he plans to do for her, he could never disappoint her. 

 He sighs, squeezing her hand once more before turning it over in his and drawing a line across her palm. “I was a-- an angry lad growing up. My father abandoned us, my mother died. I found myself seeking release. Ways to get my anger out. I was never taught anything productive.” 

 She stays quiet, letting him open up to her on his own terms and distract himself by tracing the lines in her palms. “I came here at fifteen. Gold recruited me for… well, to put my anger to good use, in his eyes. He used me-- he’s always been good at picking out someone’s weakness and exploiting it. Whenever he needed information out of someone, he would bring me along and I would…” he sighs again, taking a deep and grounding breath. “I had a favorite weapon,” he mumbles. 

 With a nod, she tries to stay calm, tries not to let fear overtake her. She was fearful of Neal when he held the knives and smirked at her, and of Peter when he pressed the tip of the blade to his finger and smiled. But when she presses her hand to Killian’s cheek and makes him look up at her, she feels no fear. She sees only truth and regret and a longing to be a different person. 

 “It was a hook?” she asks for clarification, but she can see the answer in his eyes. 

 “From Gold’s boat,” he croaks. “That’s usually where we would take… the people we were interrogating. But, Emma, it’s been years. Liam found out and put an end to it. I think that’s--”

 “What?” she asks gently as he cuts himself off, shaking his head painfully. 

 “I think that’s when things started going poorly for him.”

 He’s done so much for her. He’s soothed every ounce of pain she’s felt since she got here, since Neal sliced her cheek and he touched it tenderly. He held her together as she cried harder than she ever had before. He’s vowed to see her out of this danger despite the predicament it puts him in. And still, she feels powerless to help him. He’s sitting before her, broken and in anguish, and she can’t heal him like he has her. 

 All she can do is take his cheeks in her hands and promise him, “that was not your fault.”

 “Emma,” he breathes, his eyes pleading with her, for what, she isn’t sure. “He… he kept insisting I stay out of it. He kept holding me back, refusing to let me go, putting up a fight… I think they got tired of it, eventually. Of someone constantly questioning them and going against their word. He’d still be here if I hadn’t--”

 “No. You had no hand in what happened to Liam. And when this is all over, you’re gonna be able to leave too.”

 It’s bold of her to assume that it’s something he wants. He’s told her plenty of times that he wants to help her escape, but he’s never mentioned a desire to leave himself. It’s bold of her to assume that that’s in his best interest. But when she looks at the sadness and regret in his eyes, a part of her knows that it must be. 

 “I’m sorry,” he murmurs after a moment of silence, and she lets him cast his gaze downwards again. “I should have--” 

 “It’s okay, Killian. The things you’ve done in the past don’t reflect who you are now.”

 “Of course they do,” he nearly spits, clearly angry with himself as he pulls away and throws his head back. “I was a monster then. How can you not think of me as a monster now? I’m no better than Neal or Peter.” 

 “Don’t say that. Peter would probably do something like that now if he wanted to. Would you?” She lets her voice rise just the slightest amount, feeling more intensity than before and finding it necessary to convey to him that she doesn’t see him as a monster. 

 “Of course not.” 

 “And Neal… don’t even get me started. He nearly pulled his gun on me last week because I asked him where he was going. Would you do that?” 

 “Emma,” he says softly, finally looking at her once more, and she knows what he’s thinking. She knows he wants her out of his apartment; out of his life. 

 “You’re not a bad person,” she whispers, leaning closer to him just as he sits forward again, and they’re so close that she can feel his breath warming her nose. “I know bad people. You don’t qualify.” 

 He nods, his eyes deep and soulful as they bore into hers, and says, “I want to be a good person for you.” 

 No one has ever spoken to her like this. No one has ever expressed such a definitive desire to be worthy of her. No one has ever been so close to her and not made her instinctively want to pull away. And when she sees his eyes fluttering shut, his lashes touching his cheeks and casting long shadows in the dingy light, she wants to lean closer.

 She almost does, too, is tempted to close her eyes like he has and touch her lips to his, but there's a swift knock on the door and they spring apart so quickly that she kicks his shin, causing him to bend and silently groan. She cringes in apology as she jiggles the mouse to her computer, begging it to wake up before the knocker enters the room. 

 “Any luck?” Gold asks as he pokes his head in. 

 “None so far,” Killian answers easily, his persona shifting effortlessly and maintaining their cover. “Swan’s searching high and low, but we don’t know much about Spencer’s tactics yet.” 

 “And Hook’s been a help to you, Miss Swan?”

 “Yes,” she smiles, fighting the urge to lunge out of her chair and wring his neck for the name he’s given Killian and his insistence to still use it despite his obvious discomfort. 

 “It’s clear already that you have the club’s future in mind; I'm sure you’ll find something soon enough.” 

 She nods, staring as he walks away and cocking her head in confusion. “So weird,” she says softly once he’s gone, trying to remain quiet as he’d left the door ajar. 

 “What?”

 “That’s the second time he’s mentioned the club’s future, specifically. What does me finding this James Spencer have to do with the future of the club?”

 His response is a shake of his head, a slight roll to his eyes before he stills suddenly. His eyes widen as he looks down, then his brows knit together in thought, and she can clearly see the cogs turning in his mind. It’s like she’s watching him have an epiphany in real time. He looks up at her once, urgently, then he snaps out of it as if he’s remembering where he is, his demeanor shifting entirely as he smiles. “I’m not sure. The old man never makes any sense.” 

 “Killian…?” 

 “I’m sure it’s nothing, love. We’ll just keep working on finding Spencer, alright? There’s no need to worry.” 

 For a brief second, she feels distrustful of him. It’s reminiscent of when Neal tells her not to worry about things that she couldn’t possibly understand. It’s like he knows something, but he doesn’t think she's capable of handling the truth of whatever it is. For a brief, fleeting second, she doubts him. 

 But she can’t let herself think like that. Neal lies to her to protect himself. Killian has been nothing but honest with her, wanting nothing but her safety. Truthfully, if whatever he’s discovered is bad enough that he doesn’t want to tell her about it, she isn’t sure she wants to know. 

~~~~

~~~~

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[topazy]

The Fierce And Broken

2.05

Masterlist

“What do you mean I can’t come?”

“Y/N we have been over this,” Abby sighed. The good doctor was still avoiding eye contact with you. “You aren’t well enough to join us. I’m still very concerned that you might develop an infection, and we need you here.”

You frowned. Octavia, Raven, Clarke, Bellamy, Finn, a few guards and Abby were leaving on a mission because Raven figured out that Mount Weather had been jamming the signa. “What about Raven? She’s injured, or does that not matter because she’s expendable?”

“I never said-”

“But you think it?”

Abby’s face twisted as she stepped closer to you, she looked ashamed. “What did Raven tell you?”

“Nothing,” you scoffed. “She told me nothing but I saw you.”

Abby let out a sigh of frustration as she packed the last of the first aid kit she was taking with her. You weren’t usually willing to confront someone about a situation that didn’t involve you, but you had been seething all night. Raven was your friend and didn’t deserve to be slapped across the face regardless of how Abby felt.

“Tensions have been running high recently, and-”

Shaking your head you cut her off, “I don’t care. Raven is the only reason your daughter, and the rest of us are still alive. She saved us from the grounders and you’ve thank her by treating her like dirt.”

“Y/N...”

“This isn’t the ark,” you shook your head.

Abby cleared her throat and finally looked you in the eye. “I meant what I said before, we do need you here. How would you feel about being trained further in the medical field?”

Her question took you aback, it was unexpected. “I...what would I need to do?”

“Once you are fully healed you can shadow me and Jackson,” there was an awkward pause before she continued. “Regardless of what you think of me, don’t turn down this offer. We need all the help we can get and you have a lot of potential. Think it over and we can talk about it again once I return.”

You awkwardly left the room without saying a word before heading towards the gates of camp where you knew the group was. You needed to say bye to Raven and Octavia before they left. Being so preoccupied with your own thoughts you didn’t notice the person in front of you until it was too late. “Shit, sorry I never seen you.”

Finn shrugged, “it’s okay.”

Despite the fact you didn’t agree with what Finn did in the grounder village seeing him look so lost did pull at your emotions. You couldn’t help but feel sorry for him, you weren’t an expert but you thought Finn was suffering from post traumatic stress disorder, or something similar. So far you’d based your opinion on him from how he’d treated Raven previously, but you’d survived being taken by Anya together. You knew he was a good person and something must have caused him to snap.

“How are you feeling? I heard what the mountain men did to you.”

“Sore but I’ll survive,” you sighed. Finn nodded and began to walk past you when you stopped him. Gently you squeezed his shoulder, “whatever’s happened will sort itself out, okay? Stay safe out there.”

—

“Reyes!” You shouted while walking towards the gate fast as you could knowing they were about to leave at any moment. Raven spun around to face you and the nervous look on her face concerned you. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, “yeah, everything is peachy.”

You opened your mouth to reply when Octavia stepped in front of you with a frown on her face. “Alba, you should be resting.”

“I don’t need to rest O,” you chuckled lightly. “What I need is for the two of you to be safe out there.”

Octavia briefly filled you in on their plan as as she spoke you couldn’t help but notice the way Raven’s brown eyes darted between the two of you. Looking over Octavia’s shoulder you could see Abby and the guards walking towards the group. It was time for them to go. As you watched them leave you couldn’t help but worry with how distracted Raven seemed. It wasn’t like her, she was usually on the ball with everything.

—

It seemed you weren’t the only person Abby had told about her offer to train you as Jackson had found you to give you a gift. An atlas of human anatomy.

You had taken notes of things you didn’t understand, and would ask Jackson about later when the flaps to the tent opened. You were surprised to see Murphy standing there.

He entered the tent as you stared at him speechless. You didn’t know if you should scream at him or hug him. Murphy didn’t give you a choice as He pulled you into him, your head rested on his chest as his arms wrapped around you tightly. Eventually you stepped back, and he brushed strands of hair out of your face. “I thought you had died, then I thought I was going to die.”

You let out a deep sigh, “everything is so messed up.”

Murphy flopped down onto the makeshift bed and let out a loud groan. You noticed a few cuts and bruises that seemed to be decorating his body, “who did that to you?”

“Bellamy. I thought he was going to beat me to death, again.”

“You almost hung him, I could see why he’s mad...this time anyway.”

Murphy chuckled at the expression on your face, before pulling you to lay down next to him. “Yeah, yeah everybody hates me. I know that.”

“I don’t hate you,” you turned to face him. “I still love you John, even though you acted like a psychotic fool.”

“A psychotic fool? That’s probably the nicest thing I’ve been called. Aren’t you going to ask me?”

You were confused. The two of you had lots of things to catch up on, so it wasn’t obvious what situation he was talking about. “Ask you what?”

“If I meant to shoot her?”

A horrible feeling of guilt settled in the back of your throat. This was the tent you shared with Raven and the person who almost killed her was sitting in it with you, but you also knew it was an accident. “You’ve done some stupid shit, but I know you wouldn’t have harmed her deliberately.”

“You must be the only one.”

A comfortable silence filled the tent until you decided to break it. “My dads dead.”

Murphy sat up fast, “what?”

“Uh yeah...” you felt your voice break, “he volunteered himself on the ark.”

Murphy must have known what you meant as he linked his fingers with your own. You shared the story Clarke had told you before explaining what happened in Mount weather. You were more interested in learning what happened in the drop-ship before the grounders attacked, and what happened in Tondc.

—

You woke to the sound of shuffling close by. With a groan you opened your eyes to realise you had fallen asleep while sitting on the ground with the damn book on your lap. Craning your neck in the dimly lit tent you were able to make the figure out.

“When did you get back?”

Raven froze and looked over to you, “just now.”

You sat up and threw the book down onto the bed before stretching your stiff body. Raven didn’t look her usual self, something was off. “What happened out there?”

“I was able to break the encryption on the radio and we can now hear the mountain men. They keep talking about something called the veil.”

Your mouth curved into a smile, “you're a genius Reyes.”

Raven didn’t answer you and continued to get changed. The atmosphere between you wasn’t good, you could tell she was pissed off. She looked extremely uncomfortable when you spoke to her. You wracked your brain to try and figure out what you could have done when you realised Abby could have filled her in on your conversation.

Raven picked the book up off the bed and sat it on top of a bag so it wasn’t on the ground, “I guess I’m not the only genius here.”

“I got asked if I wanted to train more in medical stuff, I think I’m going to go for it.”

“That’s good.”

Sighing you stepped towards Raven, “what’s going on? Whatever it is you can tell me?”

You and Raven had shared a lot and had become close friends since the first night you shared a tent with each other. It hurt to think she was in pain and didn’t feel she could share it with anyone, especially you.

“Just leave it Al.”

The tone in her voice told you everything you needed to know. She was mad. “I shouldn’t have said anything to Abby but I did. She doesn’t get to hurt you like that.”

Raven stepped closer to you, “you spoke to Abby about me?”

You stared at her wide eyed. Shit. “I thought you knew,” the brunette shook her head. “I know you asked me not too, so I’m sorry if you think I’ve betrayed you in some way.”

“Why?” She asked softly, “why did you do it?”

“Because I care about you, and you're going through a lot. The last thing you need is-”

Raven cut you off by pressing her lips against your own.

[kinngxali]

Hey! could I have headcanons of nagito, hajime and fuyuhiko as older brothers and one day their sibling goes missing to play with their friends but doesnt tell anyone but they come back unharmed and their brothers were worried

i love this sm! thank you for the lovely request anon <3

i’m not good with headcanons, so i will refrain from doing them for now.

sorry if this annoys you!

Y/n: your name

F/n: friends name

•~•~•~•~•~~•~•~•~•

Nagito, Hajime & Fuyuhiko looking for their sibling!reader

warnings: slight swearing

.

.

.

Nagito ~

“Hey, Ko!”

Nagito turned around when he heard your voice call out his name, smiling at you. “Yes, Y/n? How can I help you?” You chuckled slightly, shaking your head. You were used to him being quite formal with you, and while it did annoy you at times, he was still your brother and you love him.

“Well i was going to-” You were interrupted by your friend, F/n, swinging an arm around your shoulder with a grin. “Cmon! We gotta go school!” You stood there for a second, debating if you should ask Nagito for a lift instead of taking the bus. “Would you like a ride?” Nagito asked, almost as if he was reading your mind.

“No, we’re okay!” F/n said, before dragging you away when you were about to give your brother a goodbye hug. “Have fun at school!” You heard him shout as you ran to meet with the rest of your friends, before going to the bus.

Nagito noticed that you were giggling, but of course he would never suspect you of doing anything. He was happy if you were happy.

Just as you was about to get off the bus, one of your friends pulled you back into your seat, making you let out a small yelp. “Guys, we gotta get off or we are gonna miss school!” F/n laughed and rolled their eyes, grinning cheekily. “We aren’t going to school, silly.”

“B-but-!?” They brought a finger to your lips and winked, making you blush from embarrassment. Your other friend stood up and laughed loudly. “We’re going shopping!”

“With what money?” You spat out, making F/n shake their head. “Togami-chan’s money, what else?” Togami-chan, Byakuya Togami’s adopted sister (even though they act more like coworkers) stared at you intensely.

“Oh, boy. I have no idea why I’m hanging out with you fools. And why are we on this dirty bus? I did not agree to thi-”

“We love you too Togami-chan!”

—————

5:30pm. You should’ve returned from school an hour ago.

Since he always gets home later than you, you would usually call him or even text him to let him know you were home.

Nagito put down his phone with a sigh, he wasn’t the type of person to worry. It was extremely rare for him, but this time- something felt... off.

Had you ran away? No, you were so cheerful this morning.

He wouldn’t be surprised if you did though, he doesn’t deserve to talk to you.

Maybe you had gone out to a friends house. He could call F/n’s mom?

No, trash like him shouldn’t worry that nice woman with his problems.

“Nagito, you’re spacing out again.” Chiaki waved a hand in front of his face, making Hajime mumble something along the lines of ‘you’re one to talk’ under his breath.

There was no point lying this time, if something did happen to you, he was sure his classmates could help.

“H-hey N-nagito?” He turned his head to Mikan and gave her a warm smile. “What is it?”

“W-well, I don’t know i-if you know.. but I saw Y/n on the bus with their friends earlier, i-it was way past their stop as well..”

Nagito’s mind suddenly went blank.

“No they didn’t tell me. But I doubt they’d tell trash like me their business anyway...”

“We should go look for them,” Hajime stood up abruptly, Chiaki following not long after. “They could be in trouble.”

“I have hope that they’ll be oka-”

Chiaki pulled him up and Mikan bowed and walked away quickly, going back to her original seat. “But we don’t know for sure.”

8:17pm.

“Did you find anything?” Akane shook her head regretfully, making the whole class groan.

“Maybe we should call the police..” Sonia said, glancing at Nagito, who hadn’t stopped looking around. “I don’t know.... Nagito wouldn’t want them to interfere.” Chiaki sighed, looking at her feet.

“Can you guys hear that?” Ibuki suddenly said, surprising everyone since she was being quiet this whole time. “Hear what?” Hajime said, making Nagito run over to them, a desperate look in his eyes. “People laughing.... this way!” Ibuki suddenly took off, Nagito following close behind her. As they were racing ahead of the whole class, Nagito saw a familiar shadow in the distance.

“Y/n.”

Ibuki stood still and told everyone to back down as Nagito watched you playing on the swings with your friends, laughing.

This makes sense. You had been very stressed recently.

Nagito suddenly clutched his head and laughed loudly, almost as if he was having a psychotic breakdown.

That wasn’t the case though, he was simply laughing at how foolish he had been for making a big deal out of something so minor. He even got his whole class to help.

You heard the laughing and stopped smiling, looking over to the road to see Nagito laughing hysterically. You ran over to him and slowed down as you got closer, feeling guilty.

“N-nagito?”

He looked up at you with a blank face. “I’m sorry that trash like me disturbed your time with your friends, Y/n.” You leant down and smiled at him. “No, I’m sorry for not telling you.”

Hajime ~

“How’ve your exams been lately?” Your dad asked from across the table, looking at you. In all honesty, your grades had dropped significantly. Hajime coughed from next to you, earning everyone’s attention. “They’ve been good. Me and Y/n haven’t had any problems with them.” His blatant lie seemed to have slipped past your parents, making you glance to him and send him a small smile, thanking him.

After dinner, you had both gone to your room, and Hajime flopped on his bed. You fell next to him, both of you staring at the ceiling. “So... I saw you talking to Nagito and Chiaki earlier at school~”

“S-shut up! You didn’t see anything.”

A small laugh escaped your lips.

—————

You had snuck out of school to meet up with your friends. It was hard trying to avoid Hajime, but Nagito seemed to be a great distraction as he bombarded him with his hope rant.

When you was about to walk out of the school, you noticed your classmate, Kokichi, sitting on the steps outside. “Nishishi~ took you long enough Y/n!”

Your friendly smile quickly turned into a frown as you tilted your head in confusion. “I’m sorry, you’re coming too?”

“Duh! Why else would I wait for you?” You didn’t know if that was a lie or not, but went along with it either way.

You both walked to the riverbank in a peaceful silence, which was surprising since you never really got to see Kokichi worn out.

“Hey guys!” F/n greeted you both as they stood with Rantaro. “Rantaro? Wait- how do you all know each other?” You exclaimed, “Except for Rantaro and Kokichi knowing each other... since we are in the same class~”

“Instagram.” They all said in unison as they looked over the bridge and into the water.

The sunset was beautiful.

Since the barrier was quite low and wide enough to sit on, with the help of Rantaro, you sat on it, your legs dangling over the edge, the rest of your friends did the same thing, except F/n, who leant on their elbows as they put their hands under their chin.

You all sat like that for hours, and Kokichi even fell asleep on you.

You didn’t realise how late it had gotten until Rantaro had a call from his sisters, and said he had to go home.

6pm.

They all went one by one, with you having to wake Kokichi up at 7pm, since his phone kept ringing.

You sat on there alone, listening to music as you stared at the river underneath you. This was amazing. “Y/n?” You heard from behind you, making you turn and take out your earphones.

“I’ve been looking for you for hours!” He said exhaustedly, frowning as he leant on the barrier just like F/n did before. “I-I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want your ‘sorry’.”

“...”

“Do you even know what time it is?”

“No...”

“10 o’clock.”

“O-oh, I didn’t mean to worry you Hajime..”

He sighed, rubbing his eyes. “I thought you had gone missing... or worse.” You went silent.

Hajime was always protective of you, and you slightly envied him. He was only 3 years older, but he was able to do so much.

“I just... I needed a break. This was nice.”

He smiled at you, calming down. “So this is where you went, huh?” He mumbled, looking at the river.

You yawned and stretched your arms, making Hajime chuckle and pull you off the barrier. “Can I have a piggyback ride home?” You asked, giving him puppy dog eyes. “Whatever.”

He leaned down and you jumped on his back, grinning as you leant down and fell asleep.

Fuyuhiko ~

You were walking to Hope’s Peak with Peko and Fuyuhiko, excitedly showing them your new designs.

“Peko!! What do you think?” You showed her the designs for your clothing brand and she smiled, nodding approvingly. “I think they’re lovely, Y/n!” You grinned and thanked her, before running over to Fuyuhiko. “Hey Fuyu~!” He grumbled and turned around, slowing his pace when he realised he was walking in front of you and Peko. “Do you like it?” He nodded and looked forward again, his eyebrows furrowed. “It looks cool.” You nodded and went back to Peko.

“Any plans soon, Y/n? I’m still up for teaching you some more self defence, if you don’t mind.” Peko asked you, a warm smile on her face. Peko never really smiled at other people, so everyone was always baffled when they saw how gentle she was when she spoke to you, almost like a mom.

As she patiently waited for your response, you tapped your chin. You had made plans to go out shopping with F/n and a couple others today, but you were planning to sneak out of school to do it. “I can do tomorrow, if you’re free?” You replied, earning a nod from her. “You gonna join, Fuyu?” You shouted, making him crane his neck to look at you. “I learned everything when I was younger. You’re just too damn lazy and now you have to do the classes for an extra year.”

You rolled your eyes at his lecture, sticking your tongue out at him.

—————

You ran down the stairs, going past many people you knew. Hopefully no one would strike up a conversation.

“Y/nnnnn!” You sighed as Kaede gave you a big hug, and you hugged her back, waving to Shuichi - who was standing next to her. “Are you planning on skipping class, Y/n?” Shuichi teased as you froze. “Maybe. But if Fuyu or Peko ask anything, you didn’t see me, okay?” They both nodded. “Be safe though, we wouldn’t want to attend a funeral anytime soon.” Kaede giggled, and you let out an uncomfortable laugh.

How did Kaede out of all people, make such a dark joke?

You brushed it off and ran past them into an empty classroom, before opening the window and slipping out - slipping as your feet made contact with the grass.

It wasn’t a graceful landing, but you brushed off your skirt and went to the school gate, to see F/n and a couple others standing there. “Hey! You got the money?” You nodded and gave them ¥150,000 and they thanked you and split it with everyone.

On your way to the bus station, you couldn’t help but think about how worried Fuyu would be, but you really didn’t want a bodyguard following you around while you was with your friends.

5:52PM.

Fuyuhiko growled and slammed his phone down. Where were you? Why wasn’t you answering his calls? Why did you sneak out of school?

Hundreds of questions raced around in his mind and he never had an answer to a single one.

“Master, I’m sure that they are fine-”

Fuyuhiko stood up,breathing heavily. “They could be dead for all we fucking know!” Peko stayed silent, he was right.

Another hour passed, then two hours... everyone was getting frustrated.

Fuyuhiko sat down on a bench and slammed his hand against it in anger. “Master, listen to me.” He looked up at Peko, not bothering to say anything.

“If she snuck out of school on purpose, she’s probably hanging out with her friends. She’s not that irresponsible.”

“She’s right.” You said, walking up to them. “I don’t need a bodyguard everywhere I go, I’m capable of looking after myself.”

“Y/n-” You shook your head, putting a hand up. “Wait, hear me out. I’m sorry, I didn’t want to worry you but I also wanted to prove I can look after myself.”

He didn’t say anything. He just brought you into a tight hug, almost crushing your insides. “Fu-Fuyu, ca-n’t brea-!” He let go, holding on to your shoulders, a stern look in his eyes. “If you don’t want a bodyguard, then I’ll go with you.”

“But that means you’re technically a bodyguard!” You complained, and he walked away, smirking. “Don’t care.”

[beyond-far-horizons]

Very much don't know how I feel about the finale of Moon Knight nor the series itself. The pace was frenetic and there were so many big character choices and twists it was hard to keep up.

Overall i enjoyed it and the series, I think, like the series itself, it bit off more than it needed to and I would like more time to unpack everything and take everything in, esp with the frankly irriting is it real/isnt it real? mental institution scenes.

A few points with major spoilers:

Yey Steven and Marc, that was so touching and the little bit of them interacting and with Layla were priceless!

Marc/Steven sassing Khonshu and Khonshu sassing them back - love that dynamic. Would have preferred more of that and how that played out over a few more episodes.

Layla was a badass and I loved that. The whole thing with freeing Khonshu was a lot quicker than expected and while I was a little disappointed they didn't play things out as id hoped I LOVE that she had ZERO time for his bullshit, reverse -unoed his manipulation in such a feral way, like damn girl! Let me enforce my boundaries like that! So did Khonshu want her as an avatar or not? I think yes while Marc was dead but perhaps he was playing on Marc's fears previously.

Layla as Taweret's avatar - mixed about this, happened too fast and too convenient but Battle Couple Marc/Steven and Layla yes yes yes! That was so awesome, i love the trust and appreciation from all angles there.

Ethan's acting was MVP in this episode. He really conveyed a spiritual devotee's conviction and torment and I loved that, absolutely committed. The acting in this series has been overall off the charts.

Would the real Khonshu please stand up? His intentions are still so shifty, in some ways nuanced which is great and other ways just confusing. I like some of the ideological stuff with him and Ammit even if it turned very 3rd act Power Rangers with their fight scene.

Oneshotting the Egyptian Ennead and off screen too? Gimme a break. That and them being so easily fooled in Episode 3 was disappointing although i understand cost etc.

Ammit, i liked her actually, a bit Cgi but they tried to give her some depth and she rocked that hair for a Crocodile goddess.

The scene with Layla and Marc/Steven sealing Ammit was wonderful - nothing like rebonding with your husband and his alter after their resurrection by engaging in an Ancient Egyptian ritual to seal a raging goddess, dressed as superheroes and saving the world!

Jake, hmmm, maybe. Glad Khonshu is back but a psychotic alter is still a real problem for me. Also I didn't like the dismissal of Layla as not an option for avatar as I was intrigued by the possibilities. Oh well...

So yeah maybe 7.5 or so out of 10, sometimes pushing 8 for the series. Really loved elements and hope to see more.

[lets-get-kraken-boys]

Yandere! Hawks/Keigo Takami X Reader: Caged Songbird~

(Description: Ooo, y’all are in for a treat today~! Hey, my first Gender Neutral AND Yandere fic on this account! And no less, it’s our favorite manwhore, Hawks! I sincerely hope you enjoy reading my story and if you like this fic, don’t worry, I have more yandere fic on the way~! Thank you for your time, consideration, and all the love you royals have shown a simple jester like me!)

~

Fanfiction Lingo

(Y/N) - Your Name

(N/N) - Nickname

~

“Normal speech.”

‘Inner thoughts.’

~

Requester: No One!

Reader Gender: Gender Neutral (They/Them)

Style of Story: Oneshot (Possible Part 2?) // Manipulative, obsessive, and controlling behavior; hints of stalking; kidnapping

Word Count: 1.7K Words

WARNING(s): Yandere themes, so if you aren’t okay with obsessive/possessive/psychotic natures then please don’t read!

~

[P.S: I DO NOT SUPPORT YANDERE TENDENCIES IN REAL LIFE!!! Do not confuse me writing this subject as encouraging it, there is a difference from reading/writing yandere stories V.S real life situations. Please, if someone in your life is behaving like the character in this story (i.e. obsessive, possessive, controlling, abusive, psychotic, sociopathic, LIKE A WACKADOO, etc.) get immediate help! That behavior in the real world is not romantic, sweet, or NORMAL! Stay aware and stay safe.]

~

~

“Baby bird, wait up!” the last person you wanted to talk to right now, Hawks, giggled as he drifted down to glide next to your frantic self. Even though you were already speed walking down the sidewalk away from his apartment where the two of you had previously been 20 minutes ago, you tugged your jacket closer to your frame and scurried faster through the drafty night in a desperate attempt to make him leave.

“Go away, Hawks. I’m done talking with you tonight.” you mumbled as he continued to spin around you in an almost teasing way that further pissed you off.

“Ouch, (N/N)~,” Keigo grabbed his chest where his heart is while floating directly in front of you to block your path with his massive scarlet wings, “Not even calling me by my first name anymore? C’mon, what happened to ‘my hero~’ or ‘Mr. Stud~’? Not even ‘bird brain’?” he mocked in fake shock.

You scoffed and stepped past his fiery feathers, marching down your path while shouting back, “You don’t get that lovey-dovey crap from me tonight!”

Though the rest of the world was dark in the wee hours of the night, the flickering street lamps guided you to the train station that would take you back home to your apartment that you thankfully hadn’t moved out of yet, even though Hawks constantly  whined about you ditching the “dingy” place in favor of the two of you living together in his over-the-top penthouse. You had no roommates to notify that you were heading back after a few days with Keigo and you had long ago left your parents’ house to live on your own so you pressed on, blocking out his pouty, annoyed huffs of air in favor of dreaming about your cozy bed waiting to coddle you in its embrace with no fear of sharing the space with anyone.

“(Y/N), slow down for a second! Why are you acting so weird?” you heard Keigo’s voice and jogging footsteps sound from behind you. You recognized the feeling of his hand trying to circle around your wrist but before he got too comfortable, you snatched it away from him and swiveled your body back to meet his teasing hooded eyes.

“I’M acting weird? What about you! You brought this onto yourself, stupid!” you hissed while stepping a foot back.

Though that action didn’t make him falter, instead he stepped with you and stared you dead in the eye, “What did I do, hummingbird?” he asked with another sly cock of his head.

“Really? Me yelling at you in the penthouse wasn’t enough,” you growled, “You were checking through my phone while I was in the shower like a total CREEP, Keigo! What were you thinking, that I was just gonna come out of the shower, see you looking through my private messages with friends and family without you previously asking for permission to do, and I would say “Oh, no worries, love!” Are you nuts or something?!” you hollered at the hero whose smirk made you want to gift him a punch straight in the face for his cocky attitude.

“It’s fine, baby bird, I’m just checking to make sure everything was okay! You’ve been distant with me lately~,” his eyebrows twitched up and he gave a small pout as his wings slightly drooped to the pavement.

“Wait, hold on, we’ve been on a few dates for the past two months, no where near officially dating yet, and you think stuff like that is okay? You trust me so little that you have to go behind my back and search through my private things, to what? Prove a point to yourself or something? How did you even get my password?!” you barked in his stupidly attractive face.

“Love, you’re overreaching,” Hawks strode over to you and quickly locked you in his strong arms, though you tried to squirm away in disgust, “There are things in this world that a civilian like you wouldn’t understand. Heroes have to make so many hard decisions and as your hero, I have to make sure to be just that, save you from everything and everyone, even yourself sometimes.”

He leaned his head on yours and you heard him take a deep breath in only to let it out with an almost loving sigh while he continued, “There are bad people in this world that I encounter every day and I don’t want you accidentally stumbling on them through the internet. You know, it’s really rude of you to have kept Tinder on your phone even though we’re already in a committed relationship. Good thing you have me here to help!” he chuckled, his hold on your body tightening with each passing second.

Thoroughly creeped the hell out and not one to look past such obvious red flags though his looks tried to deceive you, you finally broke free of his tight grasp and shoved him back a few feet with shaky hands. You kept your hands outstretched in front of you, though you trembled in fear, and spoke in a fake strong voice, “That’s it, Hawks, we’re done, even though there’s nothing really to be done with in the first place. No more dates, no more hanging out, just flat out don’t talk to me ever again, okay? You see me on the street, walk the other way. I sincerely wish you the best with your dating life, but here’s a tip for the next person you seek out, don’t go poking your head into their personal life until you two are more than close. Goodbye, Keigo.” you finished, breaking out into a sprint towards the train station, leaving a flabbergasted Hawks in the dust.

Keigo stood where you had just been and simply stared at your retreating form as you sped off into the night. His eyes glazed over in pure jealousy and rage as his wings poofed up behind him to physically show his anguish. He stood under the buzzing streetlamp for a couple minutes more, processing the information, until he let out a small snicker. His snickering turned into giggling, escalating to laughter, and finally into an uncontrollable hollering. He bent over himself in the fit of insanity and after gulping down the lost air in his lungs as he looked back up to the place where you had previously stood with a menacing glint sparking in his honey-colored eyes.

“(Y/N)’s just...confused...yeah. Yeah! My god, how didn’t I see it before?! I’m such a bad boyfriend! But I can fix this,” Hawks shakily straightened back up and pulled his jacket tighter to himself, smoothing down his ruffled hair and wings, “Yeah, I can fix this.” He concluded to the empty air with a satisfied hum.

“Don’t worry, (Y/N), Keigo’s here to save you yet again~,” Hawks’ crazed smile flashed in the night as he flipped down his wind-resistant glasses.

~

~ Timeskip to 10 minutes later and we’re with you! ~

~

You panted for air as your run slowed into a brisk walk yet again. Now about a half a mile away from the complete psycho you had been with, you felt much safer now than any time you’d ever been around him, pro hero or not. You swiveled around on your feet and looked behind you as you walked down the street backwards, taking careful steps and surveying the area to make sure that weirdo hadn’t followed you. No one behind you on the lonely road, no one hiding in the allies or on the rooftops you could see, and no bird brain flying behind you in the air. It was almost eerie how alone you were but you still smiled, finally free.

“Thank goodness, that was getting awkward. I’ve really gotta stop letting guys with pretty faces fool me into a date.” you huffed to yourself as you remained walking backwards. Pulling out your smartphone from your jacket pocket, you swiped through your device and pushed on the phone app to call your mom to let her know that instead of heading back to your apartment you’d like to spend the night with them, no doubt in your mind that if Hawks was determined enough he probably would have scoped out your place already since ‘heroes have connections’ and all.

As you tried to press the ‘call’ button, you heard the sound of something swiftly cutting through the air behind you but before you had time to react your phone was launched out of your loose grip. You watched as the fast moving object shot and stuck into the ground, having entirely pierced through your phone and the solid cement, rendering the device useless. Nothing but fear raced through your veins as you recognized the weapon as one of Hawks’ scarlet feathers you had happily stroked not so long ago.

Before you could book it once more down the empty street, you felt two strong arms wrap around your arms and torso. You yelped as they constricted around you like a snake wrapping around its prey and began wildly thrashing your legs, trying to wiggle your way out of your captor’s hold. You heard the “hero” sweetly coo in your ear, almost like he was trying to calm a restless baby, and you suddenly felt big gusts of wind push around your body and through your desperate squirming you realized that you were no longer on the ground.

“Relax, baby bird,” Keigo sighed in content as he swung your body up and into his arms, pinning your arms to your side and carrying you like a royal being saved by their knight, “We’re just going back home so you can...calm down a little! You’ve been under such stress lately, haven’t you? That’s probably why you lashed out! I’m so sorry for not noticing sooner, love.” Tears of frustration blurred your vision as your legs thrashed as hard as they could, but nothing could loosen the man’s tense grip.

“Let me go, you...you psychopath!” you screamed out, fast wind whipping past your face as Keigo sped back to your prison.

“Awe~, (Y/N), don’t cry,” Hawks nuzzled your head, a purr rumbling in the back of his throat as one of his feathers brushed away the tears dripping past your cheeks, “Your hero will take care of everything now~!”

~

~ The End ~

~

[azucanela]

DIVINE INTERVENTION [PT 3] OIKAWA TOORU

DIVINE INTERVENTION MASTERLIST

SUMMARY: Everything is perfectly fine. Aside from the fact that Iwaizumi cannot know by any means at all. Ever. Oikawa isn’t looking to die. 

WORD COUNT: 2.2k

WARNINGS: unedited, arguing, 

A/N: i know exactly where i want this story to go but i have no idea how im going to get there. anywho, enjoy some of this 

RULE #1

The rules were simple. And if Y/N was honest, their establishment... made sense. In fact, it had been one of few things Oikawa had done that was actually intelligent— though this excluded volleyball; even if Y/N was annoyed by his antics at times and considered him a fool, his skill in the game was practically unparalleled. And for that, she respected him

Not that she would ever admit it, of course.

The whole purpose was to set boundaries for this little thing they agreed to do— because yes, Y/N had managed to convince Oikawa to go along with her plan. These boundaries would ensure nobody was uncomfortable with the arrangement and hopefully preserve Y/N and Oikawa’s friendship. They’d both seen this trope in an endless number of romantic comedies, and decided that they would be the exception, especially since they were just movies, right? Right.

If Y/N was honest though, she had no idea how she convinced Oikawa to agree to this. But, she’d managed it. However, their little agreement had come with... a few other issues that had to be handled, especially if things were to go as planned. Said plan being to fake the end of their equally fake relationship in one of the coming months and hope nobody ever found out about it. Unless Y/N decided that a little more... divine intervention was called for of course. 

After all, that’s how they got into this mess. And she sincerely doubted the break up would keep away his psychotic fans. Y/N was fairly sure there would be a few home wreckers as well; people trying to ruin their (fake, something Y/N reminded herself of once more) relationship. And those who wouldn’t wait even a week before trying to make passes at Oikawa when they did break up.

So, maybe Y/N would search for ways to extend the fake dating, but only for Oikawa’s sake. Until they found... a more permanent solution.

Right.

Regardless, that wasn’t the only issue they had. This very plan of theirs is how they ended up avoiding Iwaizumi Hajime like the plague.

Seeing as he was both their best friends, there were a few problems here. The first being the simple fact that no matter how hard Oikawa tried— Iwaizumi Hajime had always been capable of reading him like an open book. It was funny, really. Someone so talented in manipulations meets someone who can see past all that, the only other person he’d encountered with such abilities happened to be the one he’d been handling this with. Y/N. 

Her problem was similar. She and Iwaizumi had always been close, meaning he would know. If they slipped up just once, then it would be abundantly clear that they were in fact, not dating. 

It had been one of few rules that they both had agreed on almost instantaneously. Though Y/N found herself curious as to why Oikawa had been so complacent with it, seeing as Iwaizumi was his best friend, she’d been fairly desperate in the moment to maintain her reputation. That and the fact that Iwaizumi likely would’ve bullied her rather relentlessly, and if he did know, he’d chew them both out for being stupid.

Oikawa’s reasoning was similar. Kind of. He had a decent idea of what awaited him if he told Iwaizumi. One thing being a fist to the face, the second was a long conversation that followed said violence. 

Which is how their little fake dating operation became a hide-everything-from-Iwaizumi operation.

“What do we do?”

Y/N looked to him incredulously, shrugging her shoulders awkwardly as she struggled for words, “how am I supposed to know?” She exclaims, still seated in his driveway. Soon, Iwaizumi would walk past to find that Y/N had already arrived and then they’d have to start their walk to school.

This would be more difficult than anticipated.

“I don’t know Y/N, maybe because this is your fault!” Comes Oikawa’s response, hand threading through his hair. “You have the story down right?”

Y/N raises a brow at him, they’d discussed a few possible stories as to how they’d begun dating in secret. Most of the ones that Oikawa had pitched ended up rather... cliché. “You are not making me tell Iwaizumi that Hallmark bull—”

“Well you didn’t offer a better story, did you?” He snaps, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “

Y/N offers him a tight lipped smile, “because I happen to excel at improv.”

Okay, maybe the whole fake dating thing had caused a small rift between Y/N and Oikawa as well. Or just, the entire friend group. Seeing as the pair was at odds, and their mediator was out of the loop, things had become rather chaotic. Very, very fast. 

“You are horrible a acting Y/N.” Comes Oikawa’s response, bringing his hand to the bridge of his nose as he exhaled deeply. “We’re screwed.”

Y/N scoffed, “with that attitude we definitely are.” Though Y/N almost frowns, Oikawa had become significantly... meaner ever since this had occurred. And though Y/N understood that she’d messed up, his behavior was just... off. In an attempt to shake her mind of these thoughts, she grabs Oikawa’s backpack from off the edge of the sidewalk, opening it to pull out a bag of chips he’d brought, “we just need something consistent and simple. Like, you’ve been in love with me since we met and confessed after a lot of contemplation.”

Now, Oikawa was well aware of his new attitude, though he hoped it could be written off as simple annoyance of the situation. He was just looking for a way to handle the simple fact that he was not prepared for this, at all. The thoughts in the back of his mind, the ones he’d buried—or more accurately, thought he’d buried— were resurfacing. And what better way to combat them then by starting a small rivalry until this was over.

“Yes, that makes perfect sense, thank you.” 

Sadly, Y/N had already proved to be one who didn’t really handle such attitudes well. As seen with the girl that she’d punched in the face just a few days earlier. So naturally, any thoughts of avoiding confrontation, went out the window at the sound of Oikawa’s tone. “What is up with you Oikawa, you’ve–”

“Hey guys.” 

Leave it to Iwaizumi to mess up a perfectly good confrontation. Though Y/N can’t help but feel simultaneously relieved by this fact, and stressed as Iwaizumi is here. 

“Iwa-Chan! Iwaizumi! How are you, buddy!” Oikawa exclaimed, making his way over to his friend to pat him on the back.

It felt as though they’d have to be walking on eggshells. Something that had never really been evident in their friendship until now, seeing as they’d all been fairly open. Of course there were a few things, that Y/N couldn’t help but feel reminded of now, almost wincing at the painful reminder of middle school. 

Their group hadn’t been doing so well then. And it had quickly become apparent to Y/N that she was out of the loop, and seeing as she’d been the new addition to the pair... it hadn’t been a nice feeling. 

“Let’s go then?” Y/N asked, looking between the two boys with a tight lipped smile on her face as she rose from her spot on the sidewalk. Opening the bag of chips as she pulled her backpack over her shoulder. 

Maybe it was wrong, but she also felt nice, knowing that for once— she was on the inside. Even though middle school was years ago, Y/N could tell there was something the pair still hadn’t told her. It’d been bugging her ever since they’d arrived at Aoba Johsai.

Alas, now wasn’t the time for that.

“We should probably discuss some things first.” 

There it was.

Oikawa exhaled deeply, opening his mouth in preparation for whatever conversation they were about to have, attempting to decide which explanation was most plausible. But, Iwaizumi beats him to it. 

“I’m happy for you guys.” 

Y/N blanks for a moment before saying, “what?”

Iwaizumi looks to her incredulously as he responds, “what? Am I not supposed to be happy that you two have finally handled the clearly unresolved tension and that—”

“Alright that’s enough, Iwa-Chan.” Oikawa exclaims, laughing breathily as he brings a hand to cover his friends mouth, only for Iwaizumi to look at him dully before shoving him away. 

Rolling his eyes, Iwaizumi adjusts his backpack on his shoulders, “anyways. I just wish you guys had told me sooner but...” He shrugs, turning around to begin their walk down the street and to their school. “It is what it is, now let’s go.” 

Y/N and Oikawa exchange looks, eyes wide as they do so. Both their mouthes gaping open as they scramble to follow Iwaizumi, who finally says, “just don’t let this change anything. And I guess you two can act—” He awkwardly gestures between the pair, “couple-y around me. Just don’t do anything pervy, Shittykawa.” 

Oikawa brings a hand to his chest, feigning offense as he comes to stand beside Iwaizumi, “why would I do anything pervy? Honestly you would be shocked by my dear girlfriend’s actions—”

“I don’t want to know, Oikawa!” Iwaizumi exclaims, shoving his friend away.

Y/N can’t help the way her cheeks warm as Oikawa is launched her way by Iwaizumi’s attack, he stumbles slightly, ultimately walking between her and Iwaizumi before throwing an arm over her shoulders. Though Oikawa’s eyes meet hers momentarily when he does so, a silent question within them. All it takes is a nod and his arm is resting completely on her shoulders and he’s back to his conversation with Iwaizumi as Y/N contemplated all her life decisions. 

Oikawa wouldn’t deny that it had gone better than anticipated but he already knows it’s coming when they arrive at the school and Iwaizumi is practically yanking him backwards as Y/N makes her way inside to speak with her other friends— who’d begun to swarm her almost immediately, questions leaving their mouthes rapidly as they searched for an explanation. 

Y/N can’t help but feel overwhelmed as her actual friends; the ones that are both curious and concerned, seeing as Y/N swore she would never date Oikawa Tooru and fall for her best friend. It wasn’t that there was anything wrong with Oikawa— aside from the fact that he had numerous insecurities and emotions that he refused to discuss even when it was clear everything overwhelmed him—it made sense that so much of the school was practically in love with him when you thought about it.

He had manners, decent grades, was a star athlete, and even Y/N could admit he was attractive. But... he was one of her closest friends and the idea of dating him just seemed... 

Wrong.

Aside from the shock from her real friends, there was the nosiness from the fake friends, the ones she’d never spoken to, the ones who had suddenly decided they were the best of friends and yet spoke trash about Y/N in their free time because she stole their precious Oikawa.

Yeah, the school was just a tad toxic. As if the grueling pressure of academics and intense obsession with Oikawa wasn’t enough of a red flag.

Sometimes, Y/N wishes she had gone to Shiratorizawa. 

“I feel like you know what I’m going to say, Oikawa.” Iwaizumi mutters with a sigh, leaving Oikawa to panic as he meets his friend’s eyes. The grip on his shoulder unnecessarily tight. “I don’t necessarily know what’s going on with you two— just that it’s weird. But I swear if you hurt Y/N in any shape or form—”

“I would never do that Iwaizumi.” Comes his reply, almost instantly. 

Iwaizumi pauses, eyes falling on Y/N who nervously laughs in the distance, her eyes pleading for his help before returning her attention to the group of people surrounding her. “I thought we got past this in middle school.”

“Me too, Iwa-Chan. Me too. But hey, lucky me.”

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes, uncapping his water bottle, “yeah. Lucky you, I’ll forever wonder how you got her to date you.”

“Good question.” Oikawa’s eyes fall onto Y/N, and he turns to Iwaizumi, “now. If you’ll excuse me, I need to go save my girlfriend from all of my psychotic fans.” Oikawa would never admit it, ever, but it had only been a week since Y/N pulled her little stunt and it had become evident that a relationship really was what Oikawa needed to get people off his back.

Things had definitely improved for him, and Oikawa could only wish that he could say the same for Y/N. 

 NOBODY CAN KNOW— NOT EVEN IWA-CHAN. 

[duchessofferia]

Isn’t she just delightful?

Catherine of Aragon has one of the more fascinating media legacies of anyone in the Tudor period, not in terms of how her image has fluctuated over the years, but because of how notably it hasn’t. Other hardcore Catholics of the Henrician court are inevitably vilified in stories from Protestant perspectives - Thomas More, Cardinal Wolsey, Jane Seymour and above all else Mary I, to name a few. “Protestant perspectives” doesn’t just refer to reformation texts, it includes books from the perspective of Protestant figures; usually Anne Boleyn or Elizabeth I, and more recently Thomas Cromwell with Hilary Mantel’s Wolf Hall books. Despite her unwavering faith in both the Catholic Church and her own position, Catherine’s reputation has, up until the past twenty years or so, remained close to stellar; her marriage into the English monarchy at a young age did well to divorce her from her parent’s religious persecutions, and her death some fifteen years or so before her daughter took the throne kept her from being tarnished by association to Mary’s resurrection of medieval heresy laws.

As a Tudor queen, Catherine has largely gone down in history for her irreproachable conduct, even after that history began to tilt towards the side of a religion she opposed - she is known for her charity, her piety, and her belief in her husband’s good nature no matter how vile his behavior grew to be, even at the expense of her own self image. According to Chapuys (who in this case there is no reason to disbelieve) she went to her grave questioning wether Henry’s actions after their divorce was her fault, wondering wether, if she had given him what he wanted, he may not have felt the need to break from Rome, mistreat their daughter and execute two men - one a long term friend and one his own grandmother’s religious advisor. Catherine is a noble figure, she is a tragic figure, she is most of all a dignified figure, and in Tudor media she is always given at least a sympathetic nod if not a complex or three dimensional portrayal. 

The key phrase there, though, is as a Tudor queen. Whatever else she was, Catherine was decidedly not a modern woman, just like all of her female peers living five hundred years ago were decidedly not modern women; her unflinching religious beliefs, her many attempts at producing a male heir and her devotion to her marriage are admirable traits of a female noble of the sixteenth century, less so of a twenty first century wife or businesswoman. She was a product of her time, and modernized or semi modernized Tudor media’s attempts to portray her - specifically the brand of modern Tudor media that sets out to depict Anne and Henry’s relationship as one of Sexy High Romance - always end up turning Catherine into a misogynistic caricature of herself, historical legacy be damned. The blog anneboleynnovels describes it best:

“Catherine’s greatest hurdle has been not Protestant novels, but modernized ones. These are the one subgenre in which her character at best is severely degraded and at worst is completely unrecognizable. It’s not surprising that it should be like this — finding modern corollaries to Anne and Henry, whether in an office, a Hollywood mansion, or a high school, is doable. As for most of the people who surrounded them, while some some people are harder to wrench into modern poses than others, it’s relatively easy to cut and alter those characters to make them work better in a modern setting. Catherine, however, is completely lost here. She needs to exist, or else the central conflict disappears — but she simply doesn’t have a real modern equivalent, at least not in the kinds of societies that modernizers write about; her determination that God had put her in her position and that she had to safeguard her daughter’s legitimacy, and thus her inheritance, is impossible to convey fully, especially since Henry’s historical behavior — taking a presumed inheritance from Mary, forcibly separating the two women, and confining them in residences of his choosing — can’t be precisely replicated in a modern novel without making him at best a creep and at worst a criminal. In neither case would that Henry be an appealing love object for a modern Anne, so his behavior is inevitably made more standard — he’s simply a wealthy man divorcing his wife of twenty years, and instead of taking her settlement and moving on, his wife just refuses to let go.”

As the post on Catherine’s fictionalized history points out, attempts to judge her through a modern lens, particularly in stories that center around that grand, not-at-all-murderous love affair of Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn inevitably fail to produce a balanced assesment. Susan Bordo’s highly modernized study the Creation of Anne Boleyn treats her like a footnote at best and a self righteous fool at worst, while the Catherine of Suzannah Dunn’s The Queen of Subtleties is disgustingly nicknamed “Fat Cath” (stupid cow, how could she let herself go like that after six pregnancies?) and features its leading lady, another ahead-of-her-time portrayal of Anne Boleyn, going out of her way to condescendingly paint Catherine to the reader as vengeful and delusional. Anne of Hollywood and Anne and Henry present the worst portrayals, one a hideous, deliberately unsympathetic drug addict and the other a teenage psychotic forced on Henry by his father, leading her poor, brow beaten boyfriend by the hand.

That’s not to say it would be impossible to write a well rounded modern Catherine of Aragon, but most modernized Tudor novels simply don’t care to try and make her well rounded; she exists solely to be the convenient road block to Anne and a whitewashed Henry’s happiness, a flat example of the Hysterical Woman trope rather than a Queen, a mother, or a politician. It isn’t Anne Boleyn’s fault that this happens (she can’t exactly object) but this version of Catherine never fails to rear its ugly head in Tudor media that aims to portray Anne, literally or figuratively, as a “woman of the future.” Since that reading of Anne has gained momentum over the years, this Catherine inevitably does so too.

What makes the Spanish Princess so unbearable is how blatantly Emma Frost is trying, and egregiously failing, to flip the script on this. Whatever her personal dislike of Anne Boleyn, she is very obviously trying to take this fictitious version of Anne Boleyn that has sprung up over the past few decades - that of the rebellious, sexy, pseudo feminist Modern Woman™ - and apply it to Catherine of Aragon, who was neither rebellious, a feminist or, after six pregnancies, five infant deaths and a battle with heart cancer, all that sexy. The intimacy and very real affection she and Henry shared in the early years of their marriage is stilted and unemotional, replaced by an absurd number of sex scenes and a very out of place “warrior kween” nickname. It isn’t enough for Catherine to organize a massive military campaign and give a speech to an assembly of soldiers while heavily pregnant, real life accomplishments of hers which have gone largely unacknowledged - no, the Catherine of the Spanish Princess needs to literally fight in battle, pregnant belly armor and all, subtly implying that her many miscarriages were the result of her own behavior, never mind the fact that Henry’s later wives had miscarriages as well. The deeply devoted friends Catherine actually had, one of whom served her for decades and risked royal punishment to be with her on her deathbed, are either erased entirely or put into invented conflicts with her. Her relationship with the only one of her children that survived infancy is perverted into a cold, uncaring motherhood, marked by disappointment and a refusal to even hold her daughter, let alone personally teach her Latin, commission scholars to write books for her, and request those same scholars take charge of her education.

In place of all these details, the things that make the historically minded audience love Catherine in the first place, several sordid aspects of Anne Boleyn’s fictional representations are assigned to Frost’s Catherine of The Upside Down: the ~unnatural~ blowjobs and poorly designed French hoods, the general air of cattiness, the excessive nudity, the hatred of her daughter, the inability to sexually please her husband, and the weird sense of anger at all the women in her life all stand out as hallmarks of Anne Boleyn’s less flattering portrayals, but so too do the clear attempts to pander to a feminist audience and sell itself as new age and progressive.

The fouler examples of Catherine as a modern woman aren’t yet the prevalent perception of her; a gaggle of misguided twenty first century books isn’t enough to erase the near spotless reputation she’s maintained for half a millennium. But the Spanish Princess fails to depict a more positive modernization of Catherine because it’s lazy in the attempt - it sees the habit of trying to turn sixteenth century queens into anything but sixteenth century queens and tries to replicate it by taking a handful of theatrical trends and having their protagonist perform them. Those trends have been apart of Anne Boleyn’s portrayal in the media for so long it wouldn’t be that strange to see her acting that way on screen, no matter how historically inaccurate they may be, but to assign them to someone with such a vastly different public history as Catherine is just jarring. She wasn’t like that, nobody thinks she was like that, Tudor media has always known her as being not like that, and the result is something that’s confusing at best and outright offensive at worst. It’s not fun to watch, but it’s interesting to examine, broader context in mind.

(Also credit to @queenmarytudor for that image of Meg and Mary, and seriously, check out anneboleynnovels. They’re great.)

[shushushleep]

A Broken Heart And A Spotless Mind (Series)

Hi, this is my first ever fic and I apologize for my grammatical errors, English isn’t my first language…Hope you like it.

B!D and Lena where Lena confronts B!D about lying to her about Kara being Supergirl but the thing is B!D just like Alex had her mind wiped by J’onn so that she could protect Kara.

Word Count: 1725 Warnings: Angst and Violence

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 

“Kara...Kara Danvers? My sister? Babe you must be kidding me.” You were shocked and you let out a chuckle thinking that Lena is pranking you or something but at the same time you’re confused because of her stern facial expression, “(Y/N), Don’t lie to me” Her green emerald eyes begins to water she’s also confused if you’re playing her and taking her for a fool. “GET OUT (Y/N)!” Her voice is firm “Lena, babe I don’t understand! I would never lie to you” Now your eyes starts to water still confused about the things that Lena accused you and your sisters especially Kara and the whole super friends lying to her. A moment ago you were so giddy and excited to see your girlfriend but then as you entered her apartment you can see that all of her lights are off so you wander until you saw a dim light in the hallway coming from Lena’s bedroom you walked towards it but then you heard a glass shattering so you come running then you found her sitting on the floor, puffy eyes and a half bottle of one of her expensive scotch, you approach her but all she did was to be cold and distant you. “Lena please talk to me, darling please.” Lena looked at you, caressing your cheek and you lean on her hand and she looked you in eye. “You are such a good liar, you are so convincing you know, you made me believed that a Luthor like me is worth loving, but all you ever did was to betray me and treat me like an outsider.” She let’s go of you and turns away from you and as she looks at her window.

“(Y/N), Get out now, or else I have to call security!” You were taken aback you were so confused about why Lena is acting like this but before you go,  you muttered something to your girlfriend, “Lena, I didn’t know what I’ve done wrong, but I wouldn’t lie to you and please remember that.” You look back from the doorway expecting her hug, her running to come back to you or an apology from her but nothing. So you head for the main door to leave her apartment, as you close the door you tears start to fall as you walk to the elevator then as you exit the building, you don’t want to go to your apartment just yet, you wanted to clear your mind so you started walking blindly not knowing where your feet are taking you, a few walks later you ended up in the park, you sat on the bench and then began sobbing uncontrollably, good thing it was night and no one can see you being a total mess. A little later you began to calm down but your eyes still blurry so you began to walk towards to your apartment but as you walk, you hear screeching tires then all of the sudden a black van stopped in front of you and then a man grabbed you and knocks you out...

The next day was game night at J’onn’s place, your sisters, Kara and Alex began to prepare the games and snacks, while J’onn had to run some errands. “Hey where’s (Y/N)?” Asked Alex because it seems unusual of you to not help them to prepare during game night because you love to setting the games and it has always been your routine to prepare a bizarre food combination made out of the snacks that Kara has picked out, like flamin’ cheetos with milk or PB&J with hot fries and other odd food combinations that you’ve conjured. “Oh she texted me last night that she’ll surprise Lena or something and she didn’t come home, so...” Your oldest sister covers her ears “Ok, you don’t have to finish your sentence I get it. It’s just not like her to not answer my calls.” Alex notices that Kara was quiet for some time and seems like something’s bothering her “Alex, I think it’s time to tell Lena about me being Supergirl.” Alex looked at her curiously “And how are you planning to do that? Without (Y/N) finding out?” Kara grabs the nearest chair and sits on it and rubs her temple. “I don’t know how long I could keep doing this to Lena not to mention (Y/N), I miss the little things we do.” Alex remembers those ridiculously things that you do with Kara whenever you two are bored “Like when she throws a popcorn seed and you using your laser vision to make popcorn in the air?” Kara chuckles at that memory “Yeah those little things or when she randomly tips herself over and I catch her every time she falls...” Kara sighs “I miss her so much it pains me to see her like that... her not remembering that I am Supergirl.” The red head puts a comforting hand to the heroine’s back to comfort her. “Hey, her memories will come back, just like mine did...We just have to wait for it to come back to her and if you want to tell it to Lena then I’ll distract our baby sister with something shiny or a candy or whatever Nia and Brainy could do to distract her.” Kara lets a little sigh and gave her a weak smile. An hour passes by and it’s almost eight o’ clock the usual time that Game Night starts. Nia, Brainy, and Kelly are already there and they’ve already started the game, your best friend Nia noticed that you haven’t annoyed or forced her to eat one of your odd food combos, “Hey Kara, is (Y/N) going to attend tonight? Because I’ve been practicing my mortal kombat skills and I’m ready to kick her butt” Nia chuckles but Kara looked back to Alex because they’re now having a feeling that something is a bit off but then someone entered, they look at the person who have just entered the living room, it’s Lena who brought two wine bottles. “Hey, there she is. All we need to wait is for James and (Y/N).” J’onn said but Lena quickly stopped at her tracks by the mention of your name then Kara approached her to hug her with a wine glass at hand then she said that she has something really important to tell her but then Alex just came out from the bathroom and notice Lena but without you and her stomach starts to tingle a little bit with worry but she brushes it of so she came over to greet the black-haired woman. “Lena, hi so glad you could make it.” She hugs the her “Well…It’s been awhile since the last game night because we’re all busy to stop my psychotic brother.” Lena chuckles a little bit and it became silent for a second but then Alex breaks the silence and shifts the topic. “So…Is (Y/N) going to be here any minute?” Lena suddenly froze because for the first time she doesn’t know what to say or how to say it, her mind is debating between her saying that you and her were not in speaking terms if not a breakup then scream at everyone and especially to Kara for lying to her about her identity or to suck all the pain up for just this night, this last night because she didn’t know if she can handle them lying to her face to face, especially Kara. “About that… (Y/N)..” Before she even blurts out the truth about your current situation her phone rings and it’s from an unknown number. “I think you should answer that, It seems urgent because who would’ve call at a Friday night.” Kara says. Lena excuses herself and she goes to the balcony to have some privacy.

“Hello, who is this? My office hours are already finished so you can just send the message to my assistant on Monday morning.” She puts on her Business voice but then her mood changes the voice that she heard from the other side of the phone sends shivers down to her spine. “Lena Luthor. Just the person who I was looking for, took me seventy calls before you picked it up.” Henshaw smirks “What do you want!” Lena’s voice slightly breaks. “Oh Lena, it’s not what we want, it’s about what YOU want dear.” That voice she recognize that voice anywhere, that all too familiar voice of Lillian Luthor. “What do you mean? I don’t anything to do with you .” Lena’s voice hints with anger “Oh I know, but you would anyway because I have something that you treasure the most.” Lena was hit by the realization that even though you broke her heart she can’t ignore or hide the fact that she still loves you even though she’s pushing it out the way. “Where’s (Y/N)?!” On the other side of the room Brainy received a some kind of link from his DEO tablet then he notifies Alex about it then all of then suddenly stopped playing monopoly then Alex turn on J’onn’s TV so they can watch it but then after the Brainy pressed the video they we’re all shocked and Alex, Kara, Nia and J’onn are now tearing up they can’t believe in what they are now seeing from the screen it was a video of you tied up from a chair badly beaten, with bruises and all and a blood on your lips. Lena re-enters the room then she saw you in the video. She dropped her wine glass then it shattered at the impact from the floor everyone looked at her, her eyes can’t stop the tears from falling as she looks at the screen. Then in the video Lillian began to speak. “Give me the Lead Dispersing Device and the Isotope within twenty-four hours, in exchange for your beloved little Danvers.” Lillian holds your chin. “And oh no tricks this time…Or else this will be the last time you’ll see (Y/N) Danvers breathing. Don’t keep me waiting…” The video ended Kara has now somehow clench her hand in anger and her teeth can break through a steal with anger, Alex on the other hand is cursing on the other side of the corner and throws a punch at the nearest wall and Nia’s tears start to fall again.

[frangipansi]

Levi x MC a little yandere

I died seeing this and had to try writing something for it... Hopefully I did it a little justice. Please, if you’re not already, do go follow @pon-ee as they are a simply magnificent artist!

Also, fair warning. There is possessiveness, a smidgen of swearing and a little physicality but nothing too full on. Though these may be triggers for some folk so be warned.

~

MC and Asmo were laughing up a storm as they darted to and from their rooms; deciding on who needed what and from where as they got ready to go shopping together. Levi, who could hear the both of them from his room; began to seethe, knowing MC was spending yet another day in Asmo’s company rather than with him.

“Asmo!” Levi heard her squeal before laughing more. “Cut it out, will you.”

Levi huffed and threw his controller beside him, got up from the floor and headed to the door, swinging it open and looked around as Asmo left MC’s room and headed towards his own.

She popped her head out and glanced down the hall; spotting Levi, she gave him a smile and waved. His expression instantly soured before pulling his head back into his room and closed the door, leaving MC confused.

Who did she think she was? Loudly flirting in the corridors with Asmo then pretending like nothing had happened. He wondered at what point did he stop being good enough for her; he wondered how she even expected him to let her go now. Not now when he was so in love with her.

He was brought out of his thoughts when he heard a knock at the door. “Levi?” She called to him before opening the door. “Can I come in?”

He turned and looked to her peering inside. Since when did she start saying can I come in, rather than I’m coming in? She didn’t even want to be in his room now. “You wanna come in? Come in.” He huffed, turning away from the door.

“Levi, what’s wrong?” She asked as she stepped inside, quietly closing the door and coming up behind him. “Why are you so upset?” She placed a hand on his shoulder.

He scoffed; angry and amused. “You think I can’t hear the two of you flirting.” He snapped; rolling his shoulder to flick her head from him.

“What?” She asked confused. “Who?”

“You and my perfect brother Asmodeus!” He snapped, turning to her. “What, you just suddenly realise I’m not good enough? Sneak behind my back ‘cause you think I can’t handle being dumped?”

She pulled in a breath, her eyes narrowing slightly. “Levi… I’m not dumping you. Why would I do that? And I’m not flirting with Asmo.”

He scoffed, shaking his head. “The whole house can hear you. You don’t even try to hide it.” He accused while closing the distance between them.

MC’s expression soured as she reached behind her for the door. “I’m not standing around listening to this nonsense. You’re being ridiculous.” She huffed and turned while opening the door.

“I’m being ridiculous now?” He snapped, reaching over her head and slammed the door closed. “My girl, trying to hide she’s fooling around… and I’m being ridiculous.”

She gasped when the door suddenly shut and looked over her shoulder; glancing up at Levi now looming over her smaller stature. “Let go of the door!” She barked, trying to open it again but Levi simply slammed it shut if she happened to crack it open slightly. “Levi, stop it! We can talk after you’ve finished having this stupid idea in your head.”

“You’d stay if you really loved me.” Levi noted.

She let out incredulous laugh. “Your attitude stinks. Let me out.” She turned back to the door, trying to pull it open. Flinching and gasping as Levi pressed himself against her; pinning her against the door. “Get off!”

Levi raised his free hand, cupping her chin as he lowered his lips to her ear. “It’s okay…” He whispered; listening to the shake of her breath before she used her body to shove him back.

She whipped round and angrily slammed her open palm across his face; the ring that was slightly too big on her middle finger had spun around at some point, the gem attached to it slicing a cut along his cheek bone.

He brought the back of his hand to his face, applying pressure to the scratch as his body shifted into his demon form.

“Cut it out Levi!” She said with a shake in her voice.

“It’s okay MC... You’ll learn to love me.” He said quietly as he stalked towards her.

MC once again turned to the door and pulled it open, about to slip out when Levi’s hand slammed into it again; right beside her face and she let slip a squeal. “Levi, stop it. You’re scaring me.” She whimpered as she flinched against the door, feeling his breath against her neck.

“MC?” The two of them froze when hearing the passing voice of Asmo singing out her name.

“Why don’t you call out for your new boyfriend to save you?” Levi whispered against her ear.

“He’s not my boyfriend.” She said through clenched teeth; taking a deep breath before forcing herself backward; twisting the door knob as the two fell back.

“Asmo!” She shouted as loud as she could as the handle slipped from her hand; both she and Levi toppling to the ground.

“Oh! There you are.” She heard Asmo chirp as he popped through open the door; his smile dropping as he watched MC scurrying to her feet, kicking at Levi as she ran to the door.

“What’s goin’ on? I heard MC scream!” Mammon was soon standing by Asmo as MC dived into his arms; tears streaming down her face as she tried not to openly cry.

“Get him away from me!” She cried while slipping between the two and latched onto Mammon’s jacket; peering over his shoulder to Levi as he got to his feet.

“The fuck’s goin’ on?!” Mammon barked; eyeing his brother suspiciously.

“So it’s not just Asmo, you got Mammon on the side too now?” Levi growled as he stared at MC hiding behind the older brother. “You prefer fucking those two?”

“Are you fucking crazy!” MC shouted. “I don’t wanna be fucking anyone in this household!” She added while the boy’s eyes went wide.

“Ouch.” Asmo pouted while Mammon’s face flushed pink. “Tell us how you really feel…” He murmured.

“I’ve only ever wanted you, Levi…” She said while wiping her face with the sleeve of her jumper. “I don’t know why you’ve turned a fucking psycho though, but I don’t even want anything to do with you right now.”

Mammon wrapped an arm around MC as his stare filled with anger towards Levi. “What the fuck did you do to her?!”

“Why don’t you piss off Mammon?” Levi growled. “It’s your fault anyway she doesn’t want me anymore.”

“No it isn’t!” MC snapped. “It’s your fault, Levi.”

“I’m sorry but, I am soo confused right now.” Asmo huffed, raising his hands as he looked between the fighting couple. “What is your problem Levi, sweetie?”

“You!” Levi spat. “You and Mammon are my problem! You’re stealing her away from me!”

“What? Because I want to go shopping with Asmo?” MC cried. “Because he’s the closest thing I got to a girlfriend in this fucking hellhole, you think he’s stealing my affections?”

“Hellhole?” Mammon quietly huffed.

“Girlfriend?!” Asmo chirped in delight.

“Stay away from me.” MC choked out, holding onto Mammon’s jacket tighter; Both Mammon, Asmo and Levi gasping at her words “Just, fucking stay away until you sort your shit out. You psychotic fuck!”

Levi seemed to snap out of his dangerous haze; her harsh words dripping in anger and fear giving him the sudden realization of how he had acted towards her.

“MC, I’m… I’m…” He stammered, his demon form diminishing.

“You go full yandere on her?” Mammon growled. “Ya piece of trash otaku.”

“Levi, what is wrong with you?!” Asmo seethed as he stamped his foot, fists balled at his sides. “You’re such a disaster and a weeb, you know that? Come here, MC… a spa treatment is exactly what you need right now.”

Levi watched as Mammon stood protectively at the door while Asmo tentatively took MC’s hands and led her away from the heated situation. “Seriously Levi…” His attention pulled away from MC’s disappearing frame as Mammon’s voice caught him. “The fuck is wrong with ya?”

“I’m sorry…” Levi could only murmur as he felt his legs give out on him and he dropped to his knees. “I don’t know what came over me.”

“Me and Asmo might try and win her over and all, but she’s only had eyes for you.” Mammon informed Levi as he came over to stand in front of him. “Ya pull that shit again though… I’ll fuckin’ break ya.” Levi glanced up at Mammon’s words before getting a boot to the face.

Mammon watched the otaku fall and tumble backwards. “Ya be lucky she ever wants to talk to ya again.”

With Mammon’s parting words, he left Levi alone in his room to mull over what had just transpired; sitting there with a bloodied cheek and nose as he realised the severity of his actions. There was every chance he would lose MC, he terrified her, and all from his own doing.

[serological]

Serological - ‘The Final Word’

It ends, how it began.

--------

Izuku Midoriya, Quirkless, is watching a television. On the screen is a Hero, defying the odds as a wicked and deranged Villain spouts some nonsense speech.

However, things have changed. 

Midoriya has tasted the power that Quirks can bring- he’s stepped into the Pro-Hero world, and hopefully changed it for the better. He had finally, permanently defeated the villain that almost killed his idol All-Might. All-For-One was beaten and powerless, and so was Midoriya. Even as he sits in his hospital bed, covered in bandages and stitches, Izuku isn’t sad that One-For-All is destroyed. It gave him the chance that he never would have ‘had- for a brief, glorious moment, Izuku was the Number-One Hero. It makes sense- the metaphorical scales have been balanced, and Quirks of that potential are far too dangerous and chaotic for society to have access to.

The villain on the screen, however, is Tomura Shigaraki. His League of Villains has dissolved. The PLF was utterly routed and ‘crushed between the defenders of U.A, and the Pro-Heroes led by Endeavour. Tomura’s own mentor is now as Quirkless as Midoriya himself now-is, and all of his dreams of overthrowing modern society lies in tatters. He might have lost the All-For-One Quirk (as a consequence of his mentor’s defeat), but Shigaraki incredible control over his innate Decay still made him a terrifying threat.

On the television, broadcasting all across Japan, Shigaraki is making one final gamble. In his arms, so close to disintegration, he holds the trembling form of Eri. Scared, helpless, and vulnerable. No Mirio to save her, no Aizawa to protect her. She’s back to the way she was, with Overhaul, and something resembling unbridled rage ‘stirs in Izuku’s battered body. 

“If Izuku Midoriya does not present himself to my agents, I’ll-” “-You’ll what?”

The cameraman ‘swung-around to the sudden sound of the intruder’s voice, and to the horror of the onlookers from Class 1-A, stands Hanta Sero, helmet-less. His gaze is firmly set upon Tomura, and it doesn’t shift; like a Wild-West gunslinger spying his rival, it’s like seeing Hanta’s entire world become focussed to the ‘eye of a needle. Midoriya knows that look well- he felt the same ‘way, when he faced All-For-One.

Tomura narrows his eyes, and tosses Eri away. The villain looks the hero up-and-down, and chews at the cracked skin of his lip.

“...You aren’t Izuku Midoriya. How did you find this location?” “You spot an unmarked van without a license plate ‘snatch a little girl away from her guardian? You give-chase.” Shigaraki steps down from his makeshift stage, and moves in-front of Sero, about a few ‘feet away from . “You’re that tape guy, right? I expected Bakugo, or All-Might, or Eraserhead might try and stop me. I don’t even know who you are.” Sero smirks, and spreads his hands wide. He’s feigning cockiness, trying to get under the villain’s skin. “Disappointed?” Shigaraki’s eyes ‘flash with irritation. “...You bringing any other Pro-Hero’s, tape guy? You wouldn’t be stupid enough to face me alone, surely. You know what I’m capable of.”

Sero knows, Midoriya thinks. They all did. They knew all about his hate, his malice, his cunning, his power. Shigaraki might not have All-For-One’s experience, but he had the fury and destructive potential to back it ‘up.

Shigaraki’s face twists into a psychotic grin, as he tear’s away the hand covering his face. “I mean, seriously?! Of all the Heroes that this wasted, crumbling, toothless society has-left, they send a mere NOBODY to deal with the greatest Villain to-?!”

Suddenly, a laugh interrupts Tomura’s speech. The camera moves back, and sure enough, Hanta Sero is laughing like a child on live national television. This moment of horror, of tension, and of fear, is totally overshadowed by this sudden outburst of hilarity from the ‘Hero’ of this strange broadcast.

“Are you kidding me?! Pfffft, hahaha! Oh, you must be some kind of comedian, man-!” Tomura blinks, and stops smiling. “...W-What are you talking about? Stop that. Stop laughing- what-?” Hanta’s familiar, broad-tooth grin returns, at-last, and points at Shigaraki as he continues to laugh like a ‘fool.

“Ha-Ha! Do you really think, that YOU are the greatest Villain of all-time?!”

Shigaraki’s confusion is replaced by rage, and the villain grits his teeth as Sero continues to laugh his ‘ass off, before turning his joy to the camera.

“Hey, guys at home- can you believe this guy? He should try standup or something-!” “Stop it... what are you-” “Nah, I think that Stain guy was the scariest, don’t you? Man, that guy was crazy, but he sure-was a great villain, huh? Ha, hey, do you all at home remember that ‘Dabi’ character? Y’know, I think he had the makings of a REAL villain...!”

Something instantly clicks in Izuku’s mind, even as his confused classmates look with concern at the televison.  Sero knows he can’t beat Shigaraki in a one-on-one fight. If they fought on equal footing, he’d lose to the villain. No... this whole ‘mocking’ gambit is an act. The one ‘thing that nobody ever did to Shigaraki’s face, is the one thing that’s working on both confusing and dislodging him. After all, Tomura thinks that he’s the one on the top. The destined villain, bred to destroy the society raised by All-Might’s earliest work.

A smile breaks-out across Izuku’s bruised face, remembered how entranced he was as a kid whenever he saw All-Might smiling on the television. A Hero’s smile can go a long-way for the scared masses watching at home... and if there’s one thing that Sero has over everyone else in 1-A, it’s that he’s always smiling about something.

Shigaraki finally sees that he’s being upstaged on his own twisted television show, and lunges towards Sero, but the student just ‘dances out of the way. The cameraman struggles to follow this strange dance around the room: Tomura lunges, Hanta dodges. Tomura dives forward, and Hanta flips backwards. 

Eventually, Sero spies a pattern through these wild and aimless lunges, and begins to put on a show for the struggling cameraman: a ballerina’s prancing-pirouette ‘here, or a series of backflips ‘there. In one instance, he manages to slap some ultra-smooth tape on the soles of his feet, and proceeds to skate around the room like a figure-skater.

“Man, come on, Shiggie, I thought you were meant to be good at chasing Heroes!”  “COME BACK HERE AND LET ME KILL YOU!” “Oh, that’s not very sporting! The audience at home would be heartbroken if I made things easier for you~” “GAHHH, BE QUIET YOU WORTHLESS INSECT-!” “Man, for someone who’s appearing on national TV, your scriptwriter is so generic. I’ve heard better ‘lines from Dynamight! Here, let me help you out-!”

Suddenly, a line of tape launches up towards the ceiling, and Sero begins to swing around the large warehouse, with the same level of ‘showmanship he had shown beforehand. He then ‘arcs in middair, increases his speed, and slams both of his feet ‘downwards into Shigaraki’s face. Tomura lets out a gasp of pain, and tries to grab for Sero’s ankles, but the hero is too-fast, already swinging back into the air!

“Anyway, Shigaraki, I have to be honest with you...”

Hanta swings down towards the ground, and onto the raised dais that previously served as the villain’s makeshift ‘stage’ for his televised address. A  broad arm wraps around Eri’s midsection, scooping the girl up before he soars back-up into the ‘rafters. Shigaraki grits his teeth, glaring-up at Sero’s still-smiling face as the hero holds Eri against his chest.  With his spare hand, Sero reaches into his back-pocket, and pulls out his mobile phone.

“...You aren’t the ‘Number One Villain’, anymore. Heh, if anything, I think this little fight of ours have proven one-thing: that the fear you once projected, is now only an act. You’re no more terrifying than a mugger, or a common crook. After all, if a ‘nobody’ like me can mock you, outmanoeuvre you, save your hostage and ruin your broadcast-”

One of the warehouse walls explodes, and Izuku smiles as he sees the battle-worn but imposing figures of Eraserhead, Endeavour, Snipe and Thirteen standing in the smouldering hole.

“-Imagine what they can do to you?” Hanta finishes. He fires a line of tape at the camera, dragging it’s focus away from the enraged Shigaraki and the advancing Pro-Heroes. Sero then stares into the camera-lense for a moment, and his gaze shifts over the floor for a moment, as Eri shivers against his shoulder.

Izuku holds his breath, and the pause is unbearable.

Then, the young man on the screen gives another toothy grin to the watching audience, and a sly, oh-so-familiar ‘wink.

“Have No Fear.”

The feed then cuts-out, and is reduced to static. Normal programming resumes, as the newscaster scrambles to retain some facet of professionalism on-air.

But Izuku had seen enough. He leans back into his hospital bed, closes his eyes, and finally allows himself to take a breath.

Eri is safe, Shigaraki will be placed into Tartarus, and Sero saved the day. Down the hall, the cheers of the doctors and nurses could be heard, but Izuku only sighed with relief, and rolls his head back against the cushion.

His mind wanders-back, to when he was never ‘Deku’, but the Quirkless and shunned Izuku Midoriya. He remembers one of the first questions he ever asked All-Might. At the time, he couldn’t even imagine how much it would change his fate.

‘Can someone without a Quirk, become a Hero?’

--------

It ends, how it began.

[shadow-scenarios]

hey! my bro and I are in a run & I got hit with this idea! So whaT if while Aketchi was playing good against his better judgment he started falling for kind/sweet!reader, & they seem the most hurt by his outburst/transformation - & when they reach out for him like a hug or something he hurts them really bad and snaps out of it to cry over her and confesses all sad & she’s not dead but weakly tells him that he doesn’t need shido cause he’s precious or whatever to her?

Hello Anon!! I had to read this about four times to get the gist of what you were saying but I think I understood. Akechi angst is good for the soul, I swear!

Trigger Warning: Blood ;; Injuries ;; Violence ;; Swearing

- Nexus.

Blooming Villain | Goro Akechi

Kindness was a foreign concept to Goro Akechi. He held his true personality away from the masses under the mantra of ‘ the world cannot be hate you if the world does not know you ’. Suppressing his inner rage & turmoil led to him manifesting a second Persona with the God given gift to make a heart psychotic.

With this, he plunged the world into chaos. They would finally understand the circumstances he was forced into. How sick people made him with their petulant bullshit. How much he despised Masiyoshi Shido. Akechi was the puppeteer, everyone else the puppets.

Until the Phantom Thieves began to make a display. Harpering on about bringing criminals to justice & how evildoers would be punished. Once he ascertained their identities, they would be torn to shreds, crippled by their own mistakes. That criminal trash Akira Kurusu & his band of motley do-gooders were nothing to fret about. It was simple: Laying the blame on them. He dismantled their foundations at the roots by killing off the leader, leaving the rest to scatter in fear of their lives.

Call it detective’s intuition but something was off as he began to piece the puzzle together: It was the bug planted on his phone that finally tipped him off. Everyone had known from the beginning, even if they acted so nonchalantly towards him. If they had listened in on his phone conversations, then they knew about Shido and the manifestation of his distorted desires.

So he waited. Waited for the Phantom Thieves.

The confrontation came on the afternoon of December 15th. It was a grey morning, rimed with frost & dark clouds on the horizon. Entering the Metaverse in his detective prince outfit was jarring but he paid no mind. Akechi watched as they solved the puzzles, obtaining the Letters of Recommendation until they reached the final room.

Engaging them with the princely facade & the psychotic shadows, he was quickly defeated. As to be expected. They began to spout their trash about teaming up, working together, overturning fate by working together. The same petulant bullshit everyone had given him.

Screaming at them to shut up, his transformation began. Akechi had to be stronger than them. No, he was. Loki began to manifest & they all watched in varied states of horror as his true mask began to unveil itself.

Individually, they were easily crushed. Much like ants. However, it was a colony of ants that worked together. Bringing each other back up when one was knocked down. He had almost managed to kill Joker, until one of his pathetic teammates threw themselves in the way. Despite the power he carried as a Wild Card, he was eventually defeated.

Frustrated would never be able to convey anything Akechi was feeling as the last of his energy sapped away. Losing was never a possibility in his mind & the Desperation began to set in. Slaughtering them all would be what he achieved, no matter the cost to his body.

Still, he had lost. All of his ambitions began to crumble around him & he could feel his pulse counting down the seconds he had left to live. They were going to end it all here as his vision began to blur-

A figure stepped out of formation & began to approach. They were decked out in the same fancy garb as all the other Phantom Thieves but there was boldness to the way they moved.

After everything he had put into motion, all of the harm he had caused, she still reached for his hand as he knelt on the ground, his mask shattered. Pieces realigned in his memory. Akechi remembered her as she spoke:

“ Akechi, don’t you want to come with us? ”

It was her. The person he cared about in some sort of twisted sense.

The day they met was supposed to be average. Kosei High was an institution for the privileged, which was what made Akechi despise it so. Plastic smiles & easily hidden facades, no one ever had good intentions when they approached.

He had made a foolish error, losing some of the paperwork he needed for the latest case. It would not have him lose his job as it did not contain any confidential information but it would be tiresome to rewrite. As to not arouse suspicion, he carefully picked his way through the classroom, his body language rigorously casual.

Someone tapped him on the back & he whipped around.

“ You’re Akechi, right? Well, I found some of your detective stuff underneath the desk you sit at & you seemed kinda lost so I thought I’d return it, ” was all she said as a small stack of papers were offered to him. It was exactly what he was looking for.

Taking them into his arm to ensure nothing had been taken from him, he gave her a once-over. Donning the Kosei High uniform as any student would, she seemed mostly composed. Usually, the fangirls were the most distracting part of his career with all the harassment & questions that were slightly too inappropriate to answer but she seemed less bothered about who he was, instead ensuring that he obtained what had been previously lost.

“Ah, thank you. I had been looking for these. It wouldn’t look very good for a detective to lose their work, ” he replied, playing his role.

“ No worries about it, we all lose things sometimes! Anyway, I have to go now, lunch is starting soon. See you around. ” As quickly as the conversation began, it had ended & Akechi was genuinely baffled.

There was one thing he had gleaned from that interaction: Her smile was genuine. She had wanted to help him, in return for nothing.

Second meetings were uncommon but somehow it was possible.

One of the most common places for Akechi to eat lunch was the school rooftop. It was quiet during the winter & the sound of wind rushing through his ears was serene compared to anything the school had to offer. There was something softly screeching open & as he turned to face whoever it was, there was recognition from both of them.

“ Ah. Akechi. I’m really sorry if I’m interrupting something, I like to come up here whenever there’s too much noise, ” she clarified, making no move closer nor further.

“ You’re no trouble at all. I’m merely taking a break as well. ”

So she sat. They talked. It was never about anything important but it was therapeutic not having to regurgitate promises about the Phantom Thieves & serving justice. Eventually it became a somewhat regular routine, as whenever he attended school she was there waiting. This went on for a few months with them exchanging contact information to keep in touch, even when not in school.

Being in denial was not going to help him approach the situation. He liked her. She was counted among one of his very few friends & yet he longed. Ached. Every time she said something, he felt like a fool. Only through years of practise did he barely stutter. It felt both exhilarating & disgusting at the time. No matter. Puppy crushes were easy to smother out.

When he found out she was a Phantom Thief, he felt betrayed. Was he just a source of information to her?

Yet even in the Metaverse when Akechi was essentially blackmailing them, she was still as sweet as ever. Akira insisted on having the two of them in the front lines for almost the entirety of Sae’s Palace & although keeping pace was relatively easy { he had been through entire Palaces on his own }, she always made sure to check up on him whenever possible.

In the Safe Rooms when the Phantom Thieves were to take a break, she insisted on patching up his wounds & try as he might there was no refusing. Her touch was gentle, unlike anything else he had experienced. Even if she casted a healing spell such as Diaharan, there was something all too soothing about the way it helped. It made him want to throw up.

Irrationally, all of his mangled thoughts correlated together: She had betrayed him; She was the one who decided to side with the Phantom Thieves; She would be in the front lines of the battle. He never needed her petulant bullshit.

“ Shut up! I don’t need pity, especially from the likes of you. You’re the one who pretended to care, only to go behind my back & side with them. ”

Something about the way his sword slashed all the way across her body was far too easy. The fabric from her Phantom Thief outfit tore like paper & it was clear the protector underneath did not suffice, as she screamed in agony.

Akechi did not care. He never cared to begin with.

Then why did he catch her?

Watching her blood permeate his costume was worse than any physical pain he had ever experienced. The Phantom Thieves were staring and he almost collapsed from the raw shock. It was obvious she was trying to speak but all she could do was cough up blood.

Working quickly in a panicked haze, Akechi simply put pressure onto her wound. He did not know any healing skills, though he really wished he did right now. Curses mumbled out as a fresh emotion covered his rage, his contempt for those around him: Sorrow.

Someone touched his face & he whipped his head down.

“ I- I know you’re angry,” she uttered through gritted teeth, “ but you don’t have to be. You’re precious. Shido doesn’t need you, Goro. ”

Crying was a foreign concept to Goro Akechi.

Word Count: 1.5k

Publish Date: 01.10.20