#here have some valentines that no one will want lol
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honorhearted · 2 years ago
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skzdarlings · 10 months ago
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the ride ; skz ; chan x reader
original ask: requested by @rosequartsz : chan with the prompt ❛ i want to fuck you so badly. ❜ like the reader is the same age as jeongin so chan kinda feels bad but at the same time he wants to corrupt the reader so bad cushsisjsis
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original ask: requested by anonymous : Chan and ❛ please. make me feel good. no one else can like you. ❜ ❛ have a little trust in yourself, i know you can take it. ❜
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pairing: bang chan/reader content info: friends to lovers, chan is a little older than reader, reader is not actually that innocent but pretends to be and they both get off on it lol. some not very safe driving lol keep ur eyes on the road. car sex, dirty talk, teasing, corruption play, puuuuure smut. word count: 2400 words.
masterlist. part of the valentine’s day stories series. credit to prompts. requests are closed.
enjoy!
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“That’s not fair,” Jeongin says.  “I called dibs.”
“Too bad.”  You stick your tongue out at him.  “Learn to run faster, loser.”
Jeongin scowls, once more relegated to the backseat of Chan’s car.   You are sitting pretty in the passenger seat for the fourth day in a row and Jeongin is playfully annoyed about it. 
You and your twin brother have been racing into Chan’s car since high school.  You are both at university now, but Chan still offers the occasional lift.  With storm season making public transit a bigger hassle than it’s worth, Chan has been offering more rides. 
Just because of the weather.  Not any other reason.  Of course.      
You smirk, casting a side-glance into the driver’s seat.  Chan is smiling at Jeongin through the rearview mirror, looking less like Channie, the boy of your teenage fantasies, and more like Bang Chan, the man of your adult dreams.  He is wearing a baseball cap and leather jacket, his whole demeanour oozing an effortless masculinity, the bearing of a competent man who knows he can do anything. 
And still, despite his well-earned cockiness, he has an undoubtedly shy side.  When he looks at you, the tips of his ears flame an embarrassed, fiery red, and his dimpled smile is almost boyish in its sweetness. 
“Right then,” he says.  Then, like the endearingly cheesy goofball he is, he adds, “All aboard, ready for takeoff!” 
“Jeongin,” you say, blinking innocently at your twin through the mirror.  “You have your presentation notes, right?  You don’t want to forget them.”
Jeongin double-checks his bag but you already know he won’t find them.  You deliberately took them out and placed them on the kitchen counter.
“Damn,” he says, quickly unbuckling his seatbelt.  “I thought I put them in here.  Sorry, I’ll be right back.” 
Jeongin practically flies out of the car and up the driveway, leaving you and Chan.  It happens quickly, before Chan can even compute it.  You can see the gears turning in his head, but you are faster, sighing melodramatically while gathering the hem of your skirt. 
“Silly boy,” you say.  “What should we do while he’s gone?”  You draw your skirt up your thighs just enough to tease the skin of your upper thighs. 
Chan is staring there with his mouth open, his words evaporating on his tongue.  He clears his throat after a second, ripping his gaze away.  He looks across the dashboard and laughs, a shy, awkward laugh. 
“Your brother will be back in a second,” Chan says.  “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, yeah?”
He is white-knuckling the steering wheel, like all his restraint is being poured into that physical grip.  Even so, it is not hard to pry his hand off the wheel.  You know a stronger, more belligerent shove could not bend a determined Bang Chan, but the softest touch from your gentle hands will have him breaking in seconds.   
You are slow, casual despite your racing heart, guiding his hand onto your knee.  He makes a little noise that turns your whole body to pure, liquid heat.  You make a similar sound, a faint whimper in the back of your throat, as you slide his hand up your thigh. 
“Channie,” you say, your too-sweet, too-innocent voice part of your acting, but your breathlessness undoubtedly real. 
“Don’t—”  His voice breaks and he clears his throat.  “Don’t say my name like that.  You know—”  
“What do I know, Channie?” you ask, blinking at him with wide eyes while you curl his fingers around your thigh.  You bring your legs together, holding his hand between them.
He visibly swallows, throat bobbing.  The redness has spread from his ears down his neck. 
“We’ve talked about this, baby girl,” he says, his tone stricter, taking on that darker edge that makes your heart – and everything else – gush.   “We’ve been good so far, okay?”   If stolen kisses, open zippers, and groping touches count as good.  “You’re my – you’re my friend.  You should be like a little sister or something to me… yeah?  Yeah… Yeah!”  He shakes his head, pulling himself out of the distraction caused by you unzipping your jacket.  He squeezes your thigh, a firm, warning grip.  “Don’t make this so hard,” he says. 
“What’s hard for you, Channie?” you ask, reaching into his lap and touching his thigh, then higher, finding the evidence of his words.  A shiver moves across his shoulders, his breath catching as you cup your palm around the bulge in his jeans.  “Is it something I can help you with?”  You lick your bottom lip then smile. 
“Oh,” he says.  His eyes crinkle with amusement but there is a score of different emotions on his face, all of them smoldering.  “You really wanna play that game, huh?” 
There is no chance for an answer because Jeongin returns, hopping into the car with his notes.  You and Chan separate, looking out the dashboard window.  You pat your hot skin and try to slow your racing heart. 
Sensing the oddly silent tension, Jeongin narrows his eyes and looks between you.  Eventually, his expression sours like he smells something bad. 
“Oh my god,” he says, then punches Chan in the shoulder.  “Are you fucking my sister!”
“What!” Chan says, getting redder by the second.  “Jeongin, how could— I wouldn’t— I don’t—”
“What, you don’t fuck?” Jeongin asks, then laughs until he is wheezing.  “You can do better, man.”
“Jeongin, shut up!”  You reach back to smack at him, rubbing your hand all over his stupid face and messing up his hair while he wails in protest.   
“All right, all right!”  Chan says, breaking you up.  “Let’s just… let’s just go, okay?  Okay.” 
“Yes, daddy,” you say, mostly out of spite. 
Chan squeaks. 
Jeongin pretends to gag then slumps against his window.  
“I’m gonna need to start taking the bus,” he says, morose.
-
Fortunately, thanks to the impromptu revelation of your shenanigans, it does not take much convincing for Jeongin to find another ride home.  When Chan pulls into the campus parking lot to pick you up, you approach his vehicle with a grin and a wink.    
You slide into the passenger seat, smoothing down your skirt while he sighs.  It sounds more amused than frustrated.    
“Where’s your brother?” he asks. 
You shrug with theatrical exaggeration. 
“Right,” Chan says, starting the car.  “Got it.”
He puts a hand on your headrest to leverage himself, looking out the rear window as he reverses the car.  That proximity alone gets you hot, the temptation to grab him already strong.  You play a patient game, as always, stealing glances and suggestive smiles while he drives. 
Halfway home, you put a hand on his knee.  At first your touch is innocent, tracing slow circles on the denim, then you get a little more brazen, fingertips brushing up his thigh. 
“Baby,” he says in that warning voice, eyes on the road.  Holding the wheel with one hand, he uses the other to stop your wandering ascent. 
“Yes?” you ask with all that faux-innocence.  Rather than fight his touch, you guide his hand to your lap, placing it on your knee. 
Unlike this morning, he does not play nice.  You make a startled, high-pitched sound when he immediately dives under your skirt, his rough palm pressing down where you are already aching.   Your thighs slam shut out of instinct but his hand is where it wants to be, his fingers curled around your pussy in a proprietary touch. 
“What’s wrong?” he asks, his voice playfully mean.  He grinds the heel of his palm against your throbbing clit.  He never takes his eyes off the road.  “Isn’t this what you wanted?”  
“I don’t know what you mean,” you say, though you cannot help but rock yourself against his hand. 
“Mmm,” he says, patting your pussy then stroking your thigh, guiding your legs open again.  “We’ll see about that.” 
You keep your eyes ahead too, pretending not to notice when he glances at you.  Then you gasp because he reaches out and tugs the zipper on your hoodie.  You instinctively clutch it, wearing nothing but a bra underneath, having taken off your other layers to surprise him.  He is the one surprising you, a secret sexy menace under all that shy sweetness.  He unzips the hoodie halfway then reaches past the material to squeeze a handful.  Your body practically sings under his touch. 
“Channie,” you say, breathless again. 
“Don’t worry, baby,” he says.  “Channie’s gonna take care of you, yeah?  Always.” 
“Take care of me how?”  Your question toys with that false innocence, the little game that gets you both hot, but there is genuine curiosity there too.   This game has been escalating slowly over time.  You want more and you are starting to get desperate. 
Chan looks at you.  His gaze moves over your mouth then your body, your skirt rucked up and breasts practically spilling out of your hoodie.  He swears, looking back at the road with that red blush on his ears again. 
“Fuck,” he says.  “I want to fuck you so badly.  You have no idea.” 
His words have a raw, honest edge.  He swallows, hard.  You feel like one tightly coiled ball of tension, ready to snap apart. 
“Please,” you say in that breathy voice.  “Make me feel good.  No one else can like you.” 
You do not make it all the way home.  There is a nearby lookout point at the park, a shrouded parking area that has undoubtedly seen its fair share of hook-ups.  Chan parks there and you dive at each other like randy teenagers.  You climb into his lap, bumping everything on the console on your way, the honking the horn with your backside for good measure.  It makes you both giggle.
Then your laughter is swallowed by hot, desperate, open-mouthed kisses.
“Mmm,” you hum against his lips.  You push his hat off his head and sink your fingers in his curly hair.  “Channie, please,” you say. 
He cups the back of your neck, holding your head where he wants it so he can kiss you thoroughly.  His ravishing touch leaves you shaking with need, rocking against him to no relief. 
“Poor baby,” he says with a little laugh, squeezing your neck then drawing his hand down the curve of your chest.  He unzips the rest of your hoodie.  His mouth follows the same path as his hands, down your chest and back up again. 
He is working you up, deftly and swiftly, using just a few well-placed throat kisses, a few flicks of his fingertips across the sensitive peaks of your breasts.  He seems so composed under you, other than the flush to his complexion, the heat to his skin that has him shedding his leather jacket.   You feel completely undone, half-naked and writhing in his lap.  Your hands tangle together, fumbling around his belt. 
“Let me,” he says.  He gets his belt open and his fly undone, then his hands are on you.  He doesn’t just tug your panties to the side but rips them apart, snapping the seams like they’re nothing.  Then those strong fingers are inside you, finding just how wet and ready you are for him.  He makes a low, guttural sound, thumping his head against the headrest.  “Fuck, baby girl,” he says.  “You know what you do to me?” he asks. 
“I dunno, Channie.”  You pout and bat your eyelashes.  “You better show me.” 
He laughs.  He holds your hips and moves you, positions you where he wants you.  You are pressed so close together, chest-to-chest, so you cannot see when he finally enters you.  But you feel it, hot and hard and filling you, stretching you, almost painful but burning so good.  You slap a hand to the roof of the car, eyes closing as you moan. 
“S-so much,” you say, because it feels like you have been sinking forever and he is still not all the way inside. 
“Yeah, I know, baby,” he says.  His thumb is expertly circling your clit while your whole body seems to soften, changing to fit him, like you were made for this moment.  “That’s it,” he says.  “Have a little trust in yourself.  I know you can take it.”
His thrusts are small, his hands guiding your hips over him, grinding him deep inside you.   Then you are clutching his shoulders, moaning into his neck as he fucks you slowly and steadily.  It is everything you needed and not enough, only spurring more desire.  You know you will need him again, the way he needs you.  Just the way he says your name as he holds you, as he fucks you, as he takes you apart and puts you together again.   It feels like that when you come, when he fucks you through it, saying your name and praising you. 
“Good girl,” he says, barely above a breath.  “That’s it, baby. Just like that.”
When he gets close, he pushes the seat back.   You get on your knees between his legs and take him in your mouth.  He comes with a low groan and another breathless slur of your name.  Then you are back in his lap and his hands are everywhere, clutching you possessively to his chest.  You are both breathing hard, riding the slow come-down of your frantic desperation. 
“Fuck,” he eventually says.  He seems shy again, giggling as he looks at you with a blush on his face.  “We, uh, we just did that, in the car, uh wow, yeah, I, uh—”
“Channie,” you say with a laugh of your own, grabbing his face and kissing him.  He smiles into the kiss, returning it with the same tender softness. 
You kiss for a long time, ignoring the world around you.  Eventually you have to crawl back into your seat and mostly redress yourselves, still smiling and giggling at each other the whole time.  Your phone was buzzing in your bag so you finally check it, rolling your eyes at the message there.   
You show it to Chan who laughs, blushing again, but nods. 
“Right,” he says, “We should probably go get him.”
You laugh too, sending an emoji with its tongue sticking out in response to Jeongin’s message that reads:  My ride fell through.  When you are done not-fucking each other, can you come back and get me?  Thanks.  Sluts.   
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cheeseceli · 10 months ago
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When you have plushies
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Pairing: Ot8!skz × Gn!reader (individually)
Genre: fluff, reactions
Request: so if skz had a partner who sleeps / collects plushies??? maybe also add a little where the reader is a tad bit embarrassed of it?
Warnings: none
A/n: if you saw this when I posted it for the first time no you didn't!
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Bang Chan
Y'KNOW THAT LAUGH OF HIS
The one that's so adorable and it looks like a giggle while his eyes are like crescent moons
THAT ONE
It's the one he gives you while he tries to understand that somehow he is dating the most adorable human being in the whole world
He literally has no problem if you want to sleep with them, will reassure you when it comes to that
"Do you think I can take one of your plushies with me for the tour? It'd make me feel closer to you"
Lee Know
Of course he will tease you
That's like one of the things that are included in his boyfriend package: relentless teasing
He will stop immediately if he sees that you aren't feeling it though
Will take a picture of you cuddling your favourite teddy bear and set it as his phone's wallpaper
AND will buy you some plushies and put them in his dorm
So you can feel more comfortable even when you're away from your own collection
Will never admit but he cuddles with it when he misses you
"Dori was sleeping with the plushie I bought for you. I'm going to send you a pic"
Changbin
Now that he knows, there is nothing stopping him from buying you thousands of plushies
Your collection will double in less than a month if you let him (please let him)
Might even buy some matching ones so you guys can share something in common
But he'll feel a little betrayed if you don't cuddle him to sleep and instead hug the teddy bear
"Why are you cuddling a plushie when you have me right here?? Like, c'mon now!!"
Hyunjin
You know those things where you can make a teddy bear from scratch and then gift it to someone?
He would do that for you😭
Would probably gift you a personalised plushie in your first valentine's
But overall he finds it adorable
Laughs endearingly every time he sees you sleeping while cuddling one
But will not lose the opportunity to replace the plushie and hug you throughout the night
"Would you rather have a dog or a bear as a plushie? No specific reason"
Han
Wants to give names to some of them lmao
And finds you 200% cuter because of it
Like, he knew you were adorable but you always surpass his expectations somehow
And if you get embarrassed abou it he finds you even cuter
But will make sure you don't have a reason to be embarrassed
He will throw himself in the pile of plushies, feeling like he's in heaven and making sure you knows he likes this side of you as well
"This one looks just like you! Oh my God, it's literally you"
Felix
HE LOVES IT
And he would be so casual about it as well??
Like, you'd be kinda scared of his reaction but then he's just the kindest about this
Wants to know about their names and stories you might have about them
The kind of guy who'd stitch one of them if they need to get repaired (I love him btw)
Tries to win plushies for you in those claw machines
"Which one do you want? I'll win it for you"
Seungmin
Is kinda intimidated at first lmao
Like I can see him just standing still while an army of plushies stare at his soul 😭
After the initial shock though I think he'd find it cute
Especially if there is a plushie who kinda looks like him/his skzoo
If that's the case he'll just tease you (while finding it so endearing)
"You should name this one 'Minnie'"
"I'm not naming every single one of my plushies after you"
"Why not?"
I.N
I think he wouldn't react at first, but mostly because he doesn't know what to do
Will you get sad if he teases you? Will you get embarrassed if he says it's cute?
He ends up not saying anything lol
Acts like he sees a huge collection of plushies every day
Might give you some plushies as gifts after finding out
"I just bought a very cute teddy bear in Japan. I'm giving it to you once I come back home."
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Dividers by @cafekitsune
Reblogs and feedback are always appreciated!
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starlightkun · 29 days ago
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⏯ word count: 18.3k ⏯ genre: band au, retired floprockstar/venue manager!kun, rookie/keyboardist!reader, age gap (kun is older), fluff, v v suggestive (lol it’s a kun fic written by me this gets so unhinged im sorry), ft. jungwoo/mark/chenle/jisung as reader’s bandmates, wayv as kun’s coworkers & some special guest appearances maybe?? ⏯ warnings: uhm there’s some maybe weird power dynamics going on here? reader is a former fan of kun’s but like his band flopped and they never met back then so 🤷‍♀️ read at your own peril ig, not necessarily a warning but since i do avoid describing the reader’s appearance in my fics, i wanted to give a heads up—reader is in a punk/alternative band and is mentioned and/or implied to have some tattoos and piercings (other than earlobes). i don’t get super detailed, but since it’s there, i wanted to make sure y’all weren’t caught off-guard ⏯ extra info: set in the same universe as filler episodes & sugarcoated brain, but u don’t need to read those in order to understand this one at all i prommy ⏯ author’s note: those teasers of emo kun for frequency coming out right after i wrote a punk venue manager kun into sugarcoated brain??? oh i was not going to get out unscathed ⏯ now playing… frost – txt | doing this again! – bears in trees | entropy – beach bunny
── ⋆⋅♫⋅⋆ find more stories from backstage at venue:hell here!
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“He played the keys in Vizions!” You hissed, anxiously looking over at the hallway as if Kun might reappear.
“You should see if he’ll sign your album,” Jungwoo suggested with a grin, nudging you with his elbow.
“Or fuck him,” Chenle deadpanned. “You’re in a band now too, not just a fan.”
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“Venue:Hell…” Chenle hummed as he parked the band’s van in the alleyway in the back of the building. “When was the last time we were here?”
“We had a set at their Valentine’s Day event, remember?” You leaned over the console from the backseat. “When the lead singer of Roses for Eyes got decked in face?”
A chorus of ‘oh yeah!’s and other noises of recognition sprang up around you, as well as a few snickers and hisses of sympathy at the memory. You all had already performed that night and were in line for the bar nearby when the incident happened, practically front row for it.
“And we agreed to come back,” Jisung snorted.
“If we can make it out with no broken noses, I think that’ll be a success,” you grinned, reaching over Mark to open the side door.
After grabbing some of your equipment from the back, the five of you approached the back door. It was unlocked, as promised, and you all descended into the cool, dim basement venue.
“Hello? We’re Doing this Again! The new band!” Jungwoo called out from the front of the group. You shut the door firmly behind you.
A young man skidded around into your line of sight, bright smile on his face. “Hey! I’m Yangyang.”
“Our assistant manager is out for the next few weeks, so we’re kind of all sharing custody of you guys,” he explained, gesturing for you to follow him. “I’ll show you the green room, we’ll get the rest of your stuff, then our manager should be out here before your soundcheck.”
Yangyang and another employee, Kunhang, helped unload your equipment from your van, and began setting it up on stage. You learned that Yangyang was their sound guy, and Kunhang did lights and the rest of their tech.
Once your equipment was all set up, Yangyang and Kunhang exchanged uncertain looks, glancing over towards a hallway attached to the main room that you were in. Yangyang shrugged one shoulder and made a gesture for Kunhang to go ahead. The tech rolled his eyes at his coworker, but stepped forward anyway, flashing you all a bright smile.
“We’ll show you around since he’s not out yet. He said he wanted to talk to you before soundcheck,” he explained apologetically.
Kunhang and Yangyang showed you most of the building, ending in the main green room backstage.
“Uh, you can settle in,” Yangyang waved his hands around vaguely. “We’re going to go see if the old man finally keeled over or something.”
“I heard that.” A stern voice resounded from just outside the green room, making the two employees jump and turn around.
A third man had joined you all, focusing an unamused gaze on Yangyang and Kunhang. He was dressed in black from head to toe, a black leather jacket over black button-up shirt and black jewelry glinting from his neck, ears, and knuckles. He wore dark pants and big black work boots too, so you were doubly surprised at how quietly he could move. While you could tell he was older than the rest of you, you definitely wouldn’t call him old. As soon as his sharp eyes flicked over to you from under a curtain of jet-black hair, a jolt of recognition zapped through you, and you grabbed Jisung’s arm at the same time that you bit down on your tongue to avoid making a sound. Your friend’s arm tensed in surprise, but he thankfully stayed quiet too. The newcomer’s gaze went back to his employees as quick as it had flitted over your band.
“Go find something to do,” he shooed them away with one swift hand movement.
“On it!” They replied in unison, shoes squeaking on the concrete floor as they quite literally ran away.
He turned back to you all, taking a few steps in to fully enter the green room. The annoyance drained from his face, and his features became beautifully neutral as he greeted you all politely. “Sorry, I was on a call, it took much longer than I thought it would. If they didn’t already tell you, my assistant manager is out, so it’s a bit hectic around here right now. Normally our weekly act is her responsibility.”
“Is she okay?” Jungwoo asked.
“Yes, she’s fine,” the manager replied. “She’s assisting our usual weekly with their mini-tour. Which is why you all are here, of course. We appreciate you agreeing to fill in for RFE on this temporary basis.”
“Thanks for the opportunity,” Mark replied automatically.
“If you all do well, it might not have to be temporary, hm?” He said, and though his words were kind, his expression didn’t change. You were beginning to taste blood. “I’m Kun, manager of Venue:Hell. Please let me know if you have any issues while you’re here. I’ve delayed your soundcheck already, so I’ll let you go ahead.”
With that, Kun stepped out as briskly as he had arrived, leaving no room for further conversation or introductions.
As soon as he left, Jisung yanked his arm from your grip and looked at you incredulously. “Christ, Y/N, what the fuck—”
“He played the keys in Vizions!” You hissed, anxiously looking over at the hallway as if he might reappear.
“Wait, like that band that only released one album like a decade ago that you’re obsessed with?” Chenle questioned doubtfully. “How can you be sure?”
“She went to like every gig they had,” Mark recounted. “Got us grounded, and then would insist on sneaking out while we were grounded to go to even more. If anybody is gonna recognize a member of that band, it’s her.”
“You should see if he’ll sign your album,” Jungwoo suggested with a grin, nudging you with his elbow.
“Or fuck him,” Chenle deadpanned abruptly, dropping onto the well-used couch, stretching his legs out. “You’re in a band now too, not just a fan.”
“You guys don’t get it, I didn’t just think he was hot—”
“That was definitely part of it,” Mark snorted.
“—He was awesome on the keys! And he wrote all of their songs, and produced their entire album by himself!” You defended yourself. “He made me realize I didn’t just have to do piano recitals and that I could do something like this.”
“Alright, sorry, Y/N,” Chenle said softly. “We were just messin’ with you.”
“Do you think he recognized you? Since you apparently went to so many of their shows?” Jisung asked.
You shook your head. “No way. I never had the courage to talk to them. And that was like ten years ago anyway.”
“I still think you should see if he’ll sign your CD.” Jungwoo patted your shoulder. “It’d probably make his day.”
“I don’t know, clearly the band thing didn’t work out for him,” Chenle added. “He might want to just forget it all.”
You bit the inside of your cheek nervously, then let out a dejected sigh. “Nah, it’s not like I carry the CD with me everywhere…”
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Your set at Venue:Hell that night was a hit, if you did say so yourself. It wasn’t nearly as big of a turnout as the Valentine’s event you’d played at, but that was to be expected for a random Thursday night. The crowd was surprisingly engaged, especially since you were careful to incorporate a couple covers of popular songs into your set.
Running off the stage, the five of you immediately tackled each other in a group hug that was all yelling, elbows, sweat, laughing, and chaos.
“One down, three to go!” You cheered, ruffling up Jisung’s matted hair.
“Oh my god, we’re doing this again!” Mark added breathlessly.
“Boo!” You all immediately jeered at the corny joke he made every chance he got. “Tomato! Tomato!”
He laughed loudly as you and Chenle pushed and jostled him, but not enough for him to fully leave your circle. Jungwoo tugged him back in.
“Good job, guys,” Dejun, a stage tech, congratulated you as he passed by, starting to break down some of the equipment on stage.
Your band broke apart to help the staff shut down the stage for the night as other music played over the speakers of the venue and patrons chatted and danced on the floor. A few came up to the stage to talk with you as you worked, interested both in you all as the new weekly, and what had happened to the old weekly. They seemed relieved to hear that Roses for Eyes wasn’t gone for good, and were really enthused in the feedback they had for you.
After putting your equipment that you would be taking home in the green room, you all decided to stay and mingle for a little while more. If this was only going to be for four nights, you wanted to make them count and do as much as you could to get your band’s name out there. You ordered a drink from Sicheng the bartender, at which time you found out that the 50% employee discount applied to you too for the time being. Turning back to the crowd, you strained to spot any of your bandmates among the bodies.
“Hey,” Kun had appeared next to you at the bar, and you jumped out of your skin.
“Fuckin’ Christ, dude,” you coughed, trying to catch your breath. “Can you teleport or something?”
“Sorry.” He seemed more amused than apologetic. “Good set.”
“Thanks.” You took a sip of your drink to avoid looking him in the eye.
“Who did the arrangement for that first cover?”
“I did. Uhm, it obviously wasn’t for a rock band, so I had to do some tweaking…”
He nodded, looking actually impressed. “You compose?”
“Me and Mark for the most part, yeah. The other guys pitch in on songwriting sometimes, too. Chenle’s adlibs are crazy good.”
“Cool. See you next week.” Kun pushed off the bar, disappearing into the crowd.
Mark and Jungwoo found you still rooted to that spot, robotically sucking down your drink.
“Woah, I know we did good, but I don’t know if it was ‘get absolutely smashed’ good,” Mark laughed, pulling your drink down from your mouth.
“Come on, we got Jisung dancing!” Jungwoo took your drink and put it on the bar.
Your eyebrows shot up at the news that your wallflower drummer had apparently joined in the fun. “Really?”
“Yeah, let’s go!” He grabbed your arm and toted you off with the two of them.
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The next week when you all arrived in the green room, you were a little surprised to see a plate of cookies sitting on the table in the center of the room. You all exchanged uncertain glances, looking around for any clue as to who the cookies were from or for. Jungwoo was the first one to take one from the plate and bite into it.
“Pretty good,” he gave his approval through a mouthful, encouraging the other guys to each take one or two.
You were still wary as you approached, picking a cookie up and taking a small bite. It was soft and chewy, and soon you were taking another bite.
“Oh good, you guys found the cookies,” Kun was in the doorway, having once again snuck up on you all.
Jisung started choking on his cookie, and Chenle had to smack him on the back to get it back down the right pipe. Kun’s lip twitched as he was clearly trying not to laugh, a dimple appearing and disappearing on one cheek instead.
“Did you buy these?” Mark asked, muffled through the cookie in his mouth.
“Baked them, yeah.”
“You made them?!” You stared at him, half-eaten cookie in hand.
“Unless they’re bad, then Ten made them.” He winked at you before slipping out of the room without another word.
“God, Y/N, stop drooling,” Chenle snickered, wiping at your chin teasingly.
You smacked his hand away, glaring at him. “Shut up.”
“You seriously looked like you were about to pounce on him,” Jungwoo added helpfully, tweaking your cheek as he walked by.
“Ugh, you guys are the worst!”
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Week three found you alone on the stage before your soundcheck. Your bandmates were out on a food run, but you didn’t feel like getting back in the van, so you were messing around on your keyboard. The venue staff was also scarce, you had only briefly seen Yangyang since showing up today. Tapping your foot to a familiar beat, you closed your eyes as you hummed a melody that you knew by heart, fingers flitting across the keys. It wasn’t your own band’s song, but one by Vizions, a powerful ballad.
“Haven’t heard that in a long time.”
Errant notes rang out as your eyes flew open, heart jumping out of your chest. “Fuck!”
You spotted Kun down on the floor, covering his mouth as he started laughing. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You always mean to scare the shit out of people.” You rolled your eyes at him, crossing your arms over your chest. “It’s like your favorite hobby.”
“Alright, guilty.” He held his hands up, still grinning. “Seriously, how the hell do you even know that?”
“I used to go to your shows like, all the time,” you admitted, staring down at the keys. “You were like, kinda a big reason I started doing this at all.”
“Wait seriously?” All the humor had fallen from his face as he stared at you with confusion and a touch of wonder, brows furrowed and mouth parted.
“Yeah, I uh—” You grabbed your bag from the ground at your feet and fetched the CD that had been sitting in there for the past two weeks, since your first night at Venue:Hell. “I still have your CD.”
Kun jumped up onto the stage with you, taking the plastic case from you and turning it over slowly in his hands. “I don’t even have one of these anymore. God, I remember desperately trying to sell these at shows after we had them made…” He peered a little closer at your face, then shook his head. “No, I don’t remember you, sorry.”
“It’s okay, I never talked to you guys at any of the shows,” you assured him. “I mean, what if you were creeps?”
He let out a few hearty chuckles at that, nodding. “Okay, fair. Good self-preservation skills.”
“Also, I think someone else was at the table when I bought it.”
“It’s been a while since I’ve heard any of those songs.” He handed you the disc back.
“I didn’t realize you were going to hear me,” you muttered. “When I was playing that, I was just—”
“I’m not mad,” he reassured you. “I’m just… shocked. That’s all.”
“Great, because I kind of want to die in a hole right now, so—”
“When did you realize? Who I was?”
You rubbed the back of your neck. “As soon as I saw you…”
“That makes sense,” he nodded. “I thought I had scared you too, when you grabbed Jisung.”
“You did, just not the same way you scared Yangyang and Kunhang,” you joked. Then, panic flooded your veins as you quickly went to tack on, “I’m not like, obsessed, by the way, I just really like your music, and it was a big inspiration for me to switch from classical to—”
Kun started laughing again, waving his hands in front of him to try to calm you down. “I believe you, I believe you. It’s okay, I swear, I believe you.”
“Oh thank god,” you groaned, covering your face with both hands.
“You’re a lot better than I ever was.” He dropped off the stage, starting to set up the stools around the perimeter of the floor.
“What?! No!” You immediately argued.
“You improved on what I wrote, I heard it. That little—” he imitated part of the melody you had been playing, the fingers of one hand tapping imaginary keys in the air. “—that you changed in the bridge. I like it.”
“I was just messing around waiting for them to get back with the food, I wasn’t—”
“It’s good,” he insisted. “You’re good, Y/N.”
“So were you,” you muttered, futzing with the knobs on your instrument.
“Could you do me a favor?”
“Huh?”
“Don’t mention any of this to my employees.”
“What? They don’t know?”
“No.” He shook his head. “They know I’ve been around the scene for a while, they know I can play, that’s it.”
“Why?”
He shrugged. “Will you do that for me?”
“Yeah, sure, Kun.” You weren’t sure what sudden surge of confidence possessed you in that moment, but you picked the CD up off your keyboard. “If you’ll sign this for me.”
He blinked. “What?”
“You’ve got a Sharpie around here, right?”
“Yeah, in the-in the office.” He pointed over his shoulder.
You hopped off the stage, looking at him expectantly. He led the way through the venue in a bit of a daze, until you got to a door at the end of a cramped hallway. Kun ushered you into the back office, and you tried to ignore how fast your heart was going as you stepped inside. You’d never been in the admin office of Venue:Hell, only ever the main floor area, stage, and backstage.
The walls were plastered in album covers, most of which you recognized. A small futon was pushed against one wall while a desk and office chair were cramped into another corner. Kun dug through a cup of pens sitting on the desk until he had secured a black Sharpie.
“Seriously?” He double-checked with you.
“Seriously.” You pushed the plastic case into his hands.
He chuckled, uncapping the Sharpie with his teeth before quickly scrawling his signature in the bottom right corner. He fanned it a couple times to dry the ink, then handed it back to you.
“15-year-old me would be geeking out right now,” you beamed down at the fresh signature.
Kun spat the Sharpie cap back out onto the desk. “Fifteen?! We always played at 18-plus venues!”
You snickered. “Bold of you to think that I couldn’t get my hands on a fake ID, or that most of those places were actually carding in the first place.”
“Point taken,” he groaned.
“Anyway, your secret’s safe with me.” You made a motion of zipping up your lips and throwing away the key. “And the rest of my band. I kind of already told them.”
“As long as they don’t say anything either.”
“I’ll make sure they know.”
“Thank you.”
“Thank you,” you echoed, shaking the CD case. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
Kun shook his head, gesturing towards the door. “Nothing. Good luck tonight, Y/N.”
“Right. Thanks!” You opened the office door.
On the other side was Yangyang, who glanced between the two of you suspiciously. “Oh. Y/N. What were you doing in there? With the door shut?”
You kept the CD tucked between your arm and your side. “Had some questions about the weekly slot.”
With that, you practically skipped away, giving the sound tech no further opportunities to ask questions. Of you, at least.
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Kun approached the stage from the floor as you all were doing your soundcheck for your final night at Venue:Hell. He waited patiently for you to finish the song that you were on. When he saw that you all had removed your in-ears, he spoke up.
“Got word from Roses,” he started. “They’re going to be moving to every other week when they get back. How would you guys like to alternate the weekly slot with them? My staff and regulars all really like you, we’d love to keep you on. Talk about it, let me know by Wednesday?”
He didn’t wait for an answer from you all, pivoting back around on his heel to take care of whatever else was on his never-ending checklist. The five of you looked at each other, and you already knew the answer. Chenle and Jisung high-fived while Jungwoo hastily took his bass off to grab you and spin you around. You yelped and laughed, half-heartedly smacking his back to get him to put you down as he nearly crashed the both of you into Mark and his instrument.
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At your first performance as a semi-permanent fixture around Venue:Hell, you were antsy as soon as you entered the basement, looking around expectantly.
“I’ll be back in a sec,” you told your friends over your shoulder as you left them on the main floor.
“Where are you going?” Mark called after you.
“I just want to see if Kun’s here, I want to tell him thanks for keeping us on.”
Knowing jeers and snickers sprang up behind you, but you ignored them, walking down the cramped hallway to the admin office. The door at the end was ajar, and you ducked around a precariously perched box of t-shirts to grab the door handle.
Through the crack, you could hear someone humming a faint melody. It wasn’t any song that you knew, but you did stop to listen for probably longer than you should have. You couldn’t help it, you were curious. Finally, when you started feeling like maybe a bit too much of a creep, you knocked softly, pushing the door open even more.
“Yeah?” Kun called out.
You poked your head in. “Hey.”
He looked over at you from the computer screen, nodding for you to enter the office fully. “Y/N, what can I do for you?”
“What song is that?”
“Huh?”
“That you were just humming, what is it? It’s nice.”
“It’s nothing,” he brushed it off. “Just a tune I’ve got in my head.”
“You’re still writing songs?” You asked eagerly.
“No. I haven’t in quite a few years.”
“Really? You stayed around the scene, I figured you might’ve at least had a notebook somewhere? Lyrics in your notes app? Some demos recorded on your phone?” After each one, he shook his head, and your hopeful gaze fell more and more. “Nothing?”
“Nope.”
“Huh.” You sat on the desk next to the computer keyboard, loosely crossing your arms over your chest as you tried to absorb that information. “Do you miss it at all?”
“Writing songs or performing?”
“Any of it.”
“Bits and pieces, yeah,” Kun admitted, leaning back into the office chair. “I wouldn’t go back, though.”
You tilted your head. “Why not?”
“We were broke, for one thing.” He laughed. “Don’t get me wrong, the excitement of having all those what-ifs in front of you, it was awesome. And I do miss the music. But I also like my life now just fine.”
“I didn’t mean to put down what you’re doing now, by the way,” you added. “I was just curious.”
Kun’s eyes crinkled as he smiled up at you warmly. “It’s okay, I didn’t take it like that. I thought I was going to be in the band forever too.”
You looked down at your lap, thinking about your own band, and felt an uncomfortable pressure pushing down on your chest.
“So, did you come in here for anything specific? Or to just watch me create the employee schedule for next month?”
“As thrilling of an offer as that is,” you chuckled, “I did have a real reason. I wanted to say thanks for offering us this slot. We’re all really grateful for the opportunity.”
He nodded thoughtfully. “You’re welcome. I’m glad that you guys accepted. I hope Venue:Hell can be the starting point for much more.”
“Thanks.” You stood back up, showing yourself out. You nearly slammed into Yangyang on the other side, though, and jumped back in shock. “Jesus fucking Christ, Yangyang! Why are you always in the damn hallway?!”
“Why are you always in the office?!” He retorted, just as exasperated.
You rolled your eyes and shouldered past him.
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You had settled into your biweekly sets at Venue:Hell, becoming familiar with the staff, regulars, and rhythm of the venue. A private event was renting out the space tonight, so your set had gotten moved way up, to the early evening. You didn’t mind, it meant that instead of arriving after dark, you arrived before sunset.
Kun was out setting up the stools and tables around the perimeter of the floor when you all entered the building, and gave you a wave of acknowledgement over his shoulder.
“Do you live here or something?” Chenle asked. “I’ve never seen another car out there, and you’re literally always here.”
“I might as well,” the manager mused, continuing to set up.
“Pretty sure he’s a vampire,” Jungwoo laughed. “Never seen him out in daylight.”
“Very original,” Kun replied dryly. “I’m wearing all black, I work underground…”
“You’re old!” Ten interjected from what sounded like backstage.
“I sign your checks!” He immediately barked back.
“Uh, guys?” You looked at your bandmates pointedly. “I think the call is coming from inside the house?”
They all looked down at their own dark outfits and various smatterings of tattoos and piercings, muttering among themselves before walking off. You shook your head, following after them.
The performance itself was smooth like usual, some different faces in the crowd than usual, which you chalked up to the different time. You swore you saw Kun standing in the back of the venue with someone, but they were too far back and shrouded in shadows for you to be sure. After your set, you all couldn’t hang around like usual, having to pack up everything and get out so the private event could start setting up.
Your bandmates had already taken everything else out to the van, you were the only one left in the green room, gathering up the last of your stuff to bring out. You had just finished packing one duffel bag and were stuffing another when there was a light knock on the doorway.
“Y/N, you’re still here.” It was Kun, followed by another man that you only saw out of the corner of your eye.
“Sorry, I’m almost gone,” you promised, rushing even more now.
“First, I’d like you to meet someone.” Kun’s words made you slow down, looking up properly as he gestured to the tall man with him, inked from neck to fingertip. The heavy tattoos and time didn’t make it any harder for you to place the face, though, before Kun had finished the introductions, “Johnny, this is Y/N, she plays keys in Doing this Again! Y/N, this is Johnny, he—”
“—was your drummer in Vizions,” you finished, wide-eyed.
Johnny’s eyebrows went up before his face relaxed into an easy-going smile. “Damn, I thought Kun was bullshitting when he said he’d found a fan of ours.”
“No, I’m real,” you shook your head and laughed.
“Well, I’m honored.” Johnny beamed, holding a CD case and Sharpie out to you. “Would you mind?”
“Huh?” You stared down at the items in confusion. It was your band’s CD, a new press that was available at the venue’s merch table.
“Kun invited me out to see your set. I’m a fan of yours now. I’d be stoked if you could sign my album.”
You looked between Kun and Johnny uncertainly. Kun smiled encouragingly, mouthing ‘go ahead’ at you. That was the final push you needed to take the disc and pen. Your hands shook as you signed across the plastic CD case, and you hoped it hadn’t messed up your signature too much.
“Thanks.” He took both back, fanning the CD to dry the ink. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to check out the bar now. It was an honor meeting you, Y/N.”
“Y-You too, Johnny.” You shook the hand that he had offered, his palm noticeably calloused. “Thank you.”
That left you and Kun in the green room now, and you plopped down exactly where you stood, wrapping your arms around your knees and burying your face in your legs to muffle your screams. Kun chuckled as he patted you on the head.
“Woah, you alright?”
You glared up at him. “How could you do that to me?”
“Do what?” He asked, still laughing. “I thought you liked our band?”
“Yes, but you can’t jumpscare me with your former bandmates!” You whined, hiding your face again.
“If I had told you Johnny was coming tonight, you would’ve been freaked out before going on stage.”
You huffed. Unfortunately, he was right.
“I’m going to take your silence as admission that I’m right.” After another long stretch of silence, Kun added, “He was being sincere, you know. He really did like your set, bought your CD with his own money.”
You pulled your head up, resting your cheek on your knee. “Let me guess—Getting me to sign it was your idea?”
“All him.” At your suspicious squint, Kun smiled, “Johnny likes supporting new acts on the scene. And why is it so hard for you to believe that people actually think you’re good?”
You let out a drawn-out sigh. “Typical—My parents don’t.”
He squatted down in front of you to be eye level with you. “What did they want you to do?”
“My dad started teaching me piano ever since I could sit on his lap and press the keys. They wanted me to do classical,” you commiserated. “The first time I said no to a recital, I thought the world was going to explode.”
“Did it?”
“No. They didn’t get mad, or yell, or force me to do it anyway. It was so… anti-climactic. I had this big idea of teen rebellion in my head, I guess.” You let out another heavy sigh. “But they’ve never supported me since I started doing this. When I bought my first keyboard, Mark had to help me carry it home from the music store. They’ve never come to a single gig, never even ask how it’s going. When I do talk about it, they don’t say anything, just wait for me to stop talking. They just… pretend like it’s not real.”
“If you all don’t talk about your music, what do you talk about?”
“When I’m going to choose a career path, or get married. Pretty much those two things.”
“I’m sorry your parents don’t support you, Y/N. That sucks, and I won’t take that away.” Kun squeezed your forearm, resting his hand there. “I’m sure you know this, but it doesn’t hurt hearing it again—You’re good, really good, whether or not they acknowledge it. And I hope you let yourself see that.”
You couldn’t quite smile, but blinked slowly, and nodded in acknowledgment. “Thanks, Kun.”
“Here,” he stood up, grabbing one of the duffel bags and slinging it over his shoulder, “I’ll help you with your stuff.”
His words had made you feel a little better, but you were slow to move, still self-pitying. Kun held both his hands down for you. “Come on. Normally, I’d let you pout all night, but other people have rented this space and that contract did not come with a pouting keyboardist.”
You reluctantly put your hands in his, letting him pull you to your feet.
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“So yeah, that’s what Retro Rewind is gonna be like,” you finished brightly, looking between your parents hopefully. “Do you think you think you can make it? I-I don’t expect you to stay the whole time, but we’ll be going on first, so just for our set? Maybe?”
Your mom pushed around food on her plate, eyes trained on her dish. Your father took another bite of his food, washing it down with a sip of water. The only sounds in the room were of your breathing, and utensils occasionally scraping against plates. With every passing second, the shame that usually forced you into quietly changing the topic transformed into a white-hot rage, the kind that made you feel like a teapot that was about to boil over, steam bursting from your ears as they went on ignoring you.
“Hey!” You yelled, gripping your utensil tighter. “Look at me!”
Your mother finally met your gaze, her features stern. “Quiet down.”
“I asked a question. Are either of you going to answer it?”
“You do not speak to your mother like that,” your father interjected furiously.
“Well, I’m the one doing all of the talking here, I thought I could speak however I like,” you retorted.
Your mom tried again, “Y/N, please—”
“Please what?” You stared her down. “I try to engage you guys in conversation and keep you updated on my life and get shut down every single time, but I still try the next time anyway. All I’m asking, for once, is that you acknowledge—”
“Acknowledge what exactly?” Your dad snapped, a vein in his forehead popping out. “All you do is recount grimy basement after grimy basement, events that don’t pay you, long stretches of time where you’re not even booked, clearing out your savings to record an album with no label to distribute it. What accomplishments, exactly, are we supposed to be acknowledging?”
You held his eye contact, clenching your jaw so tight it felt like your teeth might break.
“We wanted the best for you, sweetie,” your mom added weakly. “Concert halls, opera houses… not this.”
Broiling hot tears stung your eyes as you stood up, pushing your chair back with a blood-curdling screech of the legs against the floor. You swallowed down the sharp thorny thing growing in your throat enough to speak, “All I wanted was for you guys to listen to me. I didn’t realize you have been. It turns out you just hate what you’ve been hearing.”
Your mom cast her eyes back down to her plate as your father grabbed his glass, lifting it to his lips to drink, his eyes focused on something in the middle distance, looking right through you. The chair was knocked over entirely in your hurry to get the fuck out of there, and the doorframe shook and rattled as you slammed their front door closed behind you.
Running down the sidewalks, your feet pounded the pavement like it had done you wrong, and you took hiccupping gulps of air as tears streaming down your face. When you tripped over a crack in the sidewalk and narrowly avoided skinning your entire face only by skinning your hands instead, you finally slowed down. You hissed in pain as you looked down at your bloodied hands, then up at your surroundings. The street you were on was somewhat familiar. You should be about ten minutes from the venue.
A rather miserable but not terribly long walk later, you were at the backdoor to Venue:Hell. Fumbling your keys from your pocket, you unlocked the door, shutting off the alarm that you were very thankful to know the code to. You washed your hands off in the sink of the women’s bathroom. After drying them with probably too many paper towels, you could see that the bleeding had stopped, and the skin there would just be a bit raw for a little while.
Walking back out to the main floor, your keyboard was still set up on stage from your set last night. Without another thought, you were hopping up onto the stage and turning on the equipment. You needed to do something. Completely ignoring your usual warm-ups, you went right into the most vitriolic, hardcore song that you could think of, uncaring of how hard you were bringing your fingers down against the keys. In fact, the repetitive blunt force sort of felt nice against your bones. A different sort of pain than the anguish tearing through your chest, at least. You lost track of time, only thinking about the music blaring out of the speakers and shaking through you.
“Y/N?!” Kun entered the main floor from the direction of the stairs, plugging one ear. “Y/N!”
You immediately stopped playing. “Oh. Kun.”
“I got a notification that the alarm was set off, and nobody responded to my text saying it was them, so I figured I’d stop by…”
You took your phone out of your pocket. There was in fact a text from Kun from twenty minutes ago in the Venue:Hell groupchat, asking if anybody was at the venue right now, followed by several ‘no’s from the venue staff, other members of your band, and Roses for Eyes.
“Sorry,” you muttered.
He took another moment to look you over, then sighed. “Alright, come on.”
“What?”
“You’re going to break your keyboard like that.” He hopped up onto the stage, shutting off your keyboard and all the other sound equipment. “Come on.”
Interest piqued, and with nothing better to do, you followed him. Kun turned off all the lights and set the building alarm before locking up behind you. He took a sharp turn down the alley that your band normally parked your van in. The two of you walked in silence, which you were grateful for. If he tried to press you on your sour mood, you were sure you’d snap at him and just feel even worse.
Just a couple minutes later, and you were at an apartment building. Kun held the front door open for you, then the door to the stairwell. After an arduous hike up the fourth floor, you stopped in front of an apartment. He unlocked it, and led you inside.
“Is this your place?” You asked, toeing off your shoes by the front door as he did.
“Yup.” Kun pointed to the kitchen sink. “Wash your hands.”
With that, he disappeared further into the apartment. As you washed your hands, you looked around. From where you were, you could see the kitchen and adjacent living room. It wasn’t a very big space, only one bedroom if you had to guess, but Kun kept it tidy. A few vintage framed band posters were on the living room walls that you had walked past to get to the kitchen, and he had a nice plush-looking couch.
Kun returned as you were finishing drying off your hands. You looked at him expectantly. “Now what?”
He guided you over to a countertop, where he had a bunch of graham crackers double-bagged in two ziploc plastic bags. He held a rolling pin out to you. “I need these crushed into small crumbs.”
It felt good to swing the rolling pin down, to watch the cracks form in the crackers as they burst apart, then became smaller and smaller as you kept hitting them. Rolling the rolling pin along the bag would probably be more efficient, but this was more fun. Kun, for his part, said nothing about the noise as you repeatedly whacked the bag over and over with loud bangs. He was busy with something else, you didn’t really care—your attention was fully on the crackers. By the time the crackers were a fine dust, you had worked up a sweat, but the raging tension in your muscles was no more. You were still pissed, of course, but no longer had the itch to slash somebody’s tires at least.
Kun came by to review your handiwork. “Good. Dump that in the bowl, then do the other ones.”
You obliged, opening the bags and shaking out the crumbs into a metal mixing bowl before refilling the bags with a new box of graham crackers. With the bags zipped back up, you went back to work obliterating the crackers inside. You didn’t even realize somebody was knocking on Kun’s front door until he was opening it, and you heard an unfamiliar man’s voice.
“What the fuck, man? Are you doing fucking construction in there?”
“You’re complaining about noise right now?”
“Yeah, I’m trying to fucking sleep.”
“It’s two in the afternoon.”
“Keep it. The fuck. Down.”
“Get out of my fucking face.”
“Whatever. Just keep it down.”
Kun quietly shut the door, calmly doing his locks and deadbolts back up. You looked between the rolling pin in your hands and the crackers guiltily. He wordlessly pulled out his phone, and with a few taps, a hard rock song was playing out of speakers in his living room at full volume.
He rejoined you in the kitchen, having to raise his voice as he explained, “Downstairs neighbor. I can hear him and his girlfriend fucking or fighting every night. Sometimes at the same time.”
You burst into laughter, turning back around to take another swing at the graham crackers. Once those ones looked pulverized enough, you dumped them into the bowl too.
“Done?” Kun asked.
“Yep!” You nodded. “So, what is this for, anyway?”
“Cheesecake bars.” He slid the bowl over to him, pouring melted butter in and mixing them together. “This is the crust.”
“Ooh, sounds good.”
He placed a square glass baking dish in front of you. “Press the graham cracker into an even layer on the bottom.”
You did as he instructed, singing along to the next song that had started playing as you worked. Meticulously smushing the crust into the bottom of the dish, you squinted as you tried to figure out if it was even or not. As your focus increased, your singing dropped out, and you realized that there was another voice humming in the kitchen too, almost unintelligible past the loud music. You looked up from the crust to where Kun was mixing something in another bowl, his attention fully on that. Your ears strained to catch more of his voice.
Then his sharp gaze was on you, eyebrows raising inquisitively. “Done?”
“Yeah, I think.” You straightened up to let him take a look.
He gave it his nod of approval before popping the dish into the pre-heated oven. Kun went back to the other bowl, cracking two eggs into it. You followed him to that corner of the kitchen, hopping up onto the countertop next to the stand mixer. He gave you a brief look of intrigue before continuing on with his task. He secured the bowl in the stand mixer then turned it on. You watched with interest as the ingredients were incorporated together. Kun stopped it, scraping down the sides with a spatula and adding more ingredients before turning it back on. Finally, he stopped the mixer again and took the bowl and attachment from it. He handed you the mixing attachment that had just been in the batter, covering the bowl with plastic wrap and putting it in the fridge.
When he turned around to see you still dutifully holding the attachment, he pointed to it, “You can clean it off. We won’t need it again.”
You didn’t need to be told twice, taking your finger and scooping off a big chunk of batter. It was pleasantly sweet and creamy, and you eagerly licked off the rest. The sink was in arm’s reach, and you leaned forward to deposit the now-clean(ish) mixer attachment in with the rest of the dirty dishes.
Kun rolled his sleeves up to his elbows as he turned the tap on, and you shamelessly ogled his hands and forearms as he washed the dishes. Despite being in the scene for so long, he only had one tattoo between the two areas, an abstract ink swirl that started on his his right pinky finger and flowed around his arm and disappeared into his shirt. You remembered that tattoo from all the concerts you’d attended, watching these same hands play the electric keyboard.
When he held a soaking wet dish out towards you, you blinked at it, startled from your nostalgic reverie. A drop of water dripped off and onto your leg, making you panic and take the bowl from him. “Fine—Ack! It’s wet!”
“Towel’s on the oven door next to you.” He indicated with his gaze before going back to washing.
You grabbed the dish towel from its place hanging off the oven door, hastily drying both the bowl and your own hands. Another song came on that you knew, and you hummed along to the introductory guitar riff as you dried the next dish Kun handed you. As the actual vocals came in and you started singing too, you could hear Kun had started humming as well.
Pushing on his shoulder, you got an incredulous look in return, but simply grinned and pushed more insistently as you sung louder. He shook his head and poured more soap on the spatula he was cleaning.
You pushed his shoulder a third time, taking a guitar solo as an opportunity to say, “Come on, Kun. I know you can sing. And I know you’re not afraid of getting a noise complaint.”
“I haven’t performed in years—”
“You’re not performing! You’re singing with me while doing the dishes!” You gestured at said dishes zealously. “Please?”
He remained silent, then the guitar solo was over, and he joined in when the singer on the recording came back in. You were so surprised that actually worked that you ended up missing the cue, which Kun immediately noticed. He pinched your thigh, and you jerked your leg away from him with a pout, but started singing with him nevertheless. Kun had only ever done background vocals in his band, but you’d listened to that CD so many times that you knew every layer of sound, every adlib, every second of every song by heart. That’s how you could also immediately tell that Kun’s voice had matured in the years since they’d recorded that album. He’d already told you that he was out of practice, but even if he wasn’t maybe hitting all the notes perfectly, there was something richer about his voice now that left you wanting this song to last forever.
Right as he passed you the last utensil, the timer on the oven beeped, and Kun dried his hands off to attend to that, ending your sing-along. He took the cooked crust from the oven, setting it on a cooling rack. After adjusting the oven temperature, he brought the cheesecake batter back out from the fridge, pouring it over the crust. Kun put it back in the oven and set the timer again.
“Fifty minutes,” he informed you.
You swung your feet. “So what are we going to do for fifty minutes? Other than blast music to piss your neighbor off?”
Kun walked into the living room, and you hopped off the counter to follow him. He paused the music on his phone and sat on the couch, picking up the remote from the coffee table, turning on the TV, then tossing the remote at you. “You pick.”
You sat down on the couch too, quickly trying to figure out all the buttons on his TV remote. A few minutes of unsuccessfully scrolling through streaming services later, and you turned it back off with a huff. “I don’t want to watch anything. Can’t we just—I don’t know, talk or something?”
“Sure.” Kun shifted, leaning back against the armrest. “You guys have your setlist for Retro Rewind yet?”
“Ugh—Not about work,” you groaned, dropping your face into your hands.
“Okay… Do you feel better?”
“Huh?”
“Y/N, I walked in on you Phantom-of-the-Opera-ing your keys this afternoon. You looked one chandelier away from burning our shitty opera house down,” he said frankly. “I won’t ask about what—But do you feel better now? Even a little?”
The mention of Retro Rewind and opera houses brought your conversation with your parents back to you, and you pressed the heels of your palms hard into your eyes to banish the thoughts, to keep living in this nice time now with Kun. You nodded. “Yeah. I do. Thanks, Kun.”
“Good.”
“I got lunch with my parents.” You stared down at your feet. “This whole time I thought they weren’t listening to me… They were, they just wish I was somebody else. They really think I’m a fucking failure.”
“Shit…” He breathed out, scooting over to rest a hand on your shoulder.
You let out a sharp laugh, lolling your head around to look over at him. “That’s it?”
“You don’t need me to tell you I’m proud of you. You’re a kick-ass musician without me or your parents.”
“Can you tell me anyway?” You mumbled.
Kun chuckled, stroking your hair. “I’m proud of you.”
His praise made you feel warm, especially with the gentle hand still petting your hair and his playful but genuine gaze fully focused on you. You suddenly had never wanted a man more in your life.
You tilted your head curiously, “Wait, you said your neighbor and his girlfriend are always…”
“Fucking and fighting,” he repeated for you, hand resting on the nape of your neck. “At all hours of the night. At least the nights I’m here, you know.”
“Have you ever gotten payback?”
Kun took a millisecond too long to point to the speakers, as if he’d caught on but wanted to see if you’d really go for it. “I just did…”
“No, I mean…” You stood up, leaning over him and grabbing the back of the couch next to his shoulder, ignoring the roadburn on your palm. “Ever given him a proper taste of his own medicine? Fucking and fighting…”
He calmly watched you. “I haven’t.”
“Do you want to? We don’t even have to fight after.”
“You just got in a fight with your parents, I’m someone older that you used to look up to—”
“Diagnosing me with daddy issues, nice,” you snickered derisively, caging him in with your other arm. “Maybe it’s that. Maybe I feel shitty and want to feel good. Maybe I think you’re like the hottest man I know, and we have at least forty minutes until those cheesecake bars are ready.”
“Forty minutes isn’t a lot of time,” Kun mused.
“Oh?”
His eyes flicked down to your lips, then back up to yours. “You sure?”
You answered by crashing your mouths together, every nerve in your body coming to life. Kun grabbed your waist, encouraging you to sit on his lap. He let out a groan into the kiss when your hips pressed down against his, guiding you to do it again. You wrapped your arms around his neck, tangling the fingers of one hand in the hair at the back of his head, pulling every so often. He kept the rhythm of your hips as he kissed and nipped a wet trail from your mouth under your jaw and down your neck. He bit down harder at the junction of your neck and shoulder, soothing over the indents of his teeth with his lips and tongue. You were already letting out needy, obscene noises and all your clothes were still on. At this rate, his neighbor would never sleep.
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“Ah! That tickles!” You giggled, trying to push Kun’s hands away as they crept under your (his) shirt and skimmed over your sides.
Kun’s chest shook against yours as he laughed, hands continuing to explore your skin again. “Sorry, baby. I can’t help it, I’ve got a fucked out, pretty girl in my lap.”
“And whose fault is that?”
“You want to play the blame game right now?”
The hint of chastisement in his tone made you shift unconsciously on top of him, leaning in to kiss him again. He indulged you, hand coming up to cup your cheek as his tongue slipped into your mouth. You had just grabbed his hand and started guiding it lower when a faint jingle rang in the background, past the blood roaring in your ears and lewd sounds of you two kissing.
Kun pulled away with a regretful sigh, planting one more lingering kiss on your lips before whispering, “The cheesecake bars.”
“No,” you whined, dragging out the ‘o’ as you pulled his mouth back to yours.
“Yes,” he mimicked you, also dragging out his vowel in a petulant tone. Kun flipped the two of you over, depositing you on the couch and taking advantage of your surprise to loosen your arms around his neck and stand up. He stretched his arms over his head, walking into the kitchen.
You slumped into the couch cushions, opting to rest your eyes for the moment. You could hear Kun turn the timer off, open the oven door, and take the pan out before setting it on the cooling tray. Then, his footsteps reentered the living room, and you peeked your eyes open again.
Kun stopped in front of you on the couch, tucking his hands into his sweatpants as he looked down at you. With you wearing his shirt, you could very clearly see his other sporadic tattoos on his bare torso—over his hip bone, ribs, one on his inner bicep, shoulder, and you knew there was one on the back of his neck too. He cocked his head as he looked down at you. “Taking a nap?”
“Yes. Honk shoo mimimi.”
“That’s too bad. The cheesecake bars have to cool for one to two hours.”
You sat up straight. “I can nap later.”
He offered his hand. “Come on, I’m fucking you in a bed this time.”
“Couch isn’t so good for your old bones?” You teased, accepting his hand as you went to stand up. Your legs wobbled, and you only stayed upright because you were already holding Kun and used him for balance.
“I don’t think I need to say anything,” he snickered, pulling you closer until your back was against his chest. “Let’s go, my pretty girl deserves a real pillow.”
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Kun reentered his bedroom with a plate stacked high with cheesecake bars and glass of water. You smiled as he sat down in front of you, insistently handing you the water first. You gulped down half of it in one go before reaching for a cheesecake bar.
As soon as you bit into it, you groaned in appreciation. “So good.”
“Do you always make obscene noises when you eat?” Kun scoffed.
“Sorry,” you mumbled through another mouthful. “‘S really good.”
You held the rest of the cheesecake bar in your hand out to him. He wrapped his hand around yours, holding it still for him to lean forward and wrap his lips around your fingertips, taking the food in one bite. You watched him, unblinking.
When he finally let your hand go, you were snapped from your trance. “Now who’s being obscene while eating?”
He laughed, covering his mouth to keep crumbs from flying out.
Noticing that it had gotten darker out, you glanced at the time on his bedside clock. “Do you have to go to the venue tonight?”
“No, I’m off today.” He squeezed your thigh. “Not kicking you out.”
You looked down at his hand on your leg, your fingers tracing his ink up along his arm. There was a small clink as he set the plate down on the nightstand, then he was tilting your chin up so you’d look him in the eye. You twisted your head out of his gentle grip, looking back down, away from his too-intense gaze.
“You’re pouting again, baby,” he stated, breaking the long stretch of silence.
“Maybe so,” you admitted with a huff. “It’s my thinking face.”
“And what are you thinking about?”
“What—” Your throat closed up as your brain was going too fast for your mouth to keep up with. You decided to pick a simultaneously simpler yet much harder question, “Now what?”
Kun raised an eyebrow. “I need you to be more specific, because I don’t think you’re asking about dinner.”
“That’s what I mean! Are we going to eat dinner together? Or is that too much? Is it going to be just work from now on or like… something else? Some people just know but I don’t! I don’t know anything and I can’t do that!” You covered your face with your hands to hide your tears from him, embarrassed at your outburst, embarrassed to be young and insecure and having the ‘what are we’ talk right after sleeping with an older guy, embarrassed to be crying in front of him, embarrassed, embarrassed, embarrassed. God, that’s all you’d ever done since you’d met Kun, embarrassed yourself.
“Ah, Y/N,” Kun sighed, taking his hand back. “I’m too old for this shit. I thought you were awesome the first night we met. When I got to see you perform, then you told me about the arrangement you made. Even after I found out you knew about my old band, I tried to support you as crew because I figured you wouldn’t want to get tied down to an old flop like me.”
You sniffed, messily wiping your face on the sleeves of Kun’s hoodie that you were wearing. Finally meeting his eyes again, you said, “This whole time, you’ve been getting on me about not believing that I’m a good musician. Why can’t you believe that you were too? I haven’t seen a keyboard or anything around here, you don’t write songs anymore, don’t tell anybody about it at all, you won’t even sing while doing the dishes!”
He smiled bittersweetly and shrugged. “We didn’t make it.”
“You run an underground punk venue, you should know that success doesn’t equal skill!” You insisted. “Or are you the exception for some reason?”
“You… are probably right. It seems I have some esteem issues to work on as well,” he acquiesced.
“You’re not a flop, at least not to me. And even if you were, you’re a lot more than that too.” You crossed your arms. “Like, if anything, you’re just retired.”
“Okay, now that really makes me sound old.”
“Says the man who literally just said, quote: ‘I’m too old for this shit.’”
“About the petty relationship stuff.” He wrinkled his nose. “Retirement is just too far.”
You giggled at his reaction, and while he rolled his eyes, the corner of his lips twitched, betraying his amusement too.
“Let me be even clearer then,” Kun declared, sandwiching one of your hands between both of his. “If you want something—a relationship—I’m all yours.”
You practically launched yourself at him, throwing your arms around his neck and locking your lips together. He let out a noise of surprise, wrapping his arms around your waist to steady you nevertheless. You mumbled ‘mine’ against his mouth, to which he immediately nodded, cradling the back of your head and pulling you closer. He slowly eased back onto his elbows, encouraging you to straddle his hips as his thumbs stroked the bare skin of your thighs. You grabbed his shoulders, pushing him flat to the mattress as you disconnected from the kiss, sitting up higher to look down at him. He looked up at you, arching an eyebrow as he stayed down.
“Now what, pretty girl?” He questioned.
“Say it again?” You requested sweetly, leaning down to kiss his throat.
“I’m all yours.” The words vibrated under your lips, and you moved back up to kiss them right out of his mouth.
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“Welcome home.” Mark was sitting on your couch when you got back to your own apartment the following afternoon, feet kicked up on the coffee table as his fingers flitted over a video game controller.
“Feet!” You reminded him loudly, throwing the front door closed.
Your roommate removed his feet from the coffee table, sitting forward with his elbows on his knees instead. He kept his eyes on the TV screen as you walked by. “So where were you?”
“I told you, I had lunch with my parents.”
“All night?” He snorted.
“You’re a smart boy, I’m sure you can figure it out.”
You went into your room to change out of your outfit from yesterday. You had already showered at Kun’s place but definitely needed some fresh clothes. Emerging from your room in a new set of pajamas, you plopped down onto the couch and stretched your legs into Mark’s lap.
“You usually give me a heads-up in case the guy’s an axe murderer,” Mark commented, shifting to accommodate your feet. “Were you wearing a crew hoodie for the venue when you walked in?”
“We work there?” You pointed out rather than admitting that it was actually Kun’s. “Anyway, sorry I forgot to text you. He wasn’t an axe murderer, by the way.”
“Figured as much when you came back with your head attached.”
When his character onscreen died, you snickered. “You suck.”
He turned the TV off, sitting back as he asked, “How’d lunch go?”
“Awful. They finally said the quiet part out loud: They think I’m a failure and will never support me doing this,” you sighed.
Mark winced, but nodded sympathetically, more than familiar with your strained family relationship. “Damn, I’m sorry, Y/N. I really thought they would’ve come around by now.”
You shrugged. “Yeah, it fucking sucks. But we’re really good, even if they’ll never come to a show.”
“Hell yeah!” He offered a hand out, and you smacked yours against it in a resounding high-five. “Ooh, hey, a couple of the guys from RFE told me about this guitar shop that I wanted to check out. Do you want to come? We can get dinner after?”
“Sure.”
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Rock music played over the speakers of the guitar shop, guitars of all shapes and sizes covered the walls and displays, accented by the neon lights lining the floors and ceiling. You meandered with Mark, letting him gasp and gush over the instruments as you kept your hands to yourself, looking at the cool variety that was in stock.
“Anything in particular you guys are looking for?” The man that had been sat behind the glass counter called out as your path through the store brought you closer.
When you turned to look at him over your shoulder, intending to let him know that you all were just looking, he lifted his head from where he had been replacing the string on an acoustic guitar, shifting his long hair from his face and granting you your first good look at his features. He had large sunglasses perched on his head, dark makeup around his eyes, his nails painted black, and thanks to the black bleach tie-dyed tank top he wore, you could see the chain and lock tattoo going around one of his biceps.
You screeched to a halt, desperately smacking Mark to make sure you weren’t seeing things. Your friend yelled and fought back, swatting at your hand. “Dude, what the hell?”
The worker was still looking at you, amused confusion on his face as he tilted his head curiously. “Is everything okay?”
“Sorry, this might be weird—Were you in a band like ten years ago?” You asked hesitantly, despite being very sure of the answer yourself.
Whatever he thought was going on, he clearly hadn’t been expecting that, looking pleasantly surprised as he sat up a bit straighter on his stool. “Yeah, actually. I—”
“You played bass, and your band was called Vizions,” you finished. “Yuta.”
Yuta chuckled. “Right on the money.”
“Seriously?” Mark’s eyes were popping out of his head.
“We saw you guys perform a few times, actually.” You pointed between you and your friend. “In like, high school.”
“High school?” Yuta must have had the same realization that Kun did, but just smirked. “Cool. You guys are actually not going to believe this, hold on—” He stood up, leaning over the counter to yell out towards another section of the store, “Hey! C’mere!”
A few moments later, another man came around the corner, looking a bit out of place. He was wearing a rainbow pastel checkered sweatervest over a white button-up shirt, with brown corduroy pants and sensible-looking tennis shoes. His light brown hair had soft waves as it was neatly cut and styled, and he pushed a pair of square clear-framed glasses up the bridge of nose. As he stopped at the counter near you, Mark, and Yuta, you could faintly make out the faded marks where he had let piercings close up in his eyebrows, nose, along the cartilage of his ears, and a few open ones on his earlobes that had no jewelry in them. The change in style threw you off for an extra second, but seeing him next to Yuta gave you enough context to place his face as well.
“TY!” You immediately named the newcomer.
He startled, but his features were immediately overcome by a bashful smile, blushing from his ears to his neck. “Please, Taeyong. Nobody calls me that anymore.”
“Right, sorry…”
“It’s fine…?”
“Oh, Y/N, and Mark,” you introduced both of you.
“They used to go to our gigs when they were in high school,” Yuta informed Taeyong with a grin.
Taeyong paused on this, letting out a short sigh. “As a teacher, I will say that I can’t condone that anymore… but we may or may not have had fakes in high school as well.”
You perked up. “You’re a teacher now?”
“Yes, I teach music at a primary school.”
“I own this place,” Yuta added, gesturing to the guitar store. “Do some songwriting on the side.”
“That’s so cool that you guys still do music stuff!” You said brightly.
“We’re not the only ones,” Taeyong said. “Kun, our keyboardist, he works at a music venue. The other two, not so much. Johnny, our drummer, he’s a tattoo artist, but he goes to so many gigs it’s like he never left the scene. And then Jaehyun…”
Both of them laughed, and you and Mark exchanged a glance as you were on the outside of the joke.
Taeyong continued, “Stay at home father of four.”
“That’s fucking crazy.” Mark shook his head.
“Well, that’s pretty much why Vizions is no more,” Yuta explained. “Jaehyun’s girlfriend got pregnant, and he wanted to be a dad more than he wanted to be a rockstar. We decided that was a good place to call it, and started doing our own stuff.”
You shot Mark a look. “If you leave the band because you knock a girl up, I’m going to kill you.”
He held his hands up defensively. “Woah! So not called for! And who was at some mystery guy’s house last night?”
“Shut up!”
“You brought it up first!”
Taeyong cut into your squabbling, “You guys have a band?”
“Yeah, it’s called ‘Doing this Again!’” You answered brightly, jabbing your elbow into Mark’s side to make sure he knew that you had won. “I play keys and do some vocals.”
“I play guitar and sing,” Mark added through gritted teeth. “We’ve got another guitar, drummer, and bass.”
“You got any upcoming shows?” Yuta asked.
“We uh, we actually have a recurring slot at Venue:Hell every other week,” you answered. “We rotate out with another band, Roses for Eyes. Our next set is this Thursday, but there’s a special event next month, Retro Rewind.”
Taeyong and Yuta exchanged a confused look before the shop owner spoke up. “Wait, Kun’s place?”
“Yeah, he’s the manager.”
“Have you told him you know about our band?”
You nodded. “He signed my CD.”
“You should’ve brought it,” Mark clicked his tongue regretfully.
“You still have one of our albums?!” Taeyong’s eyes went wide.
“She’s obsessed,” your roommate muttered.
“Shut up, no I’m not,” you hissed back, smacking his arm this time. “You say that like your first electric guitar wasn’t the same kind Taeyong had because you—”
Mark slapped a hand over your mouth. “It’s a good guitar!”
You stuck your tongue out, and he immediately jerked his hand back, wiping it on his pants. “Gross! God knows where that thing was last night. Do I need to get a shot or something?”
“I’m going to shave your head in your sleep.”
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You entered the green room just enough to toss your bag onto the couch, then pivoted right around. “Be back!”
“Where are you going?” Jungwoo called after you.
“To piss!”
Walking right past the bathroom, you stopped outside the closed admin office door, knocking on it eagerly.
“If you’re Yangyang, figure it out yourself!” Kun’s annoyed voice rang out from inside.
You poked your head in, offering him a sheepish smile. “Bad time?”
The peeved look on his face faded, and he waved you in with a tired smile. “No, not at all. Perfect timing, actually.”
“Why’s that?” You quietly closed the door behind you, moving to lean against the desk.
“I was stressed out, and seeing you makes me feel better.”
“You’re in the same clothes as when I brought you lunch yesterday,” you observed suspiciously, then looked over at the rumpled pillow and blanket on the futon. “Did you sleep here?”
“We had these back-to-back events—”
“You live a block away!”
“I went home to shower—”
“But you couldn’t grab a change of clothes while you were there? Or sleep there?”
He rubbed the back of his neck guiltily. “Old habits, I guess.”
You tilted your head. “What?”
“After Vizions, when I first got hired, business at the venue wasn’t really great. The owner at the time let me crash here until I could afford my own place.” He stared at the old futon and chuckled, “Turns out the venue was failing because the owner was keeping everything for himself. When the current owners took over, they started paying me a living wage and suddenly I had an apartment and a real mattress.”
“Kun.”
He turned his gaze from the piece of furniture up to you. “Hm?”
“That’s not your life anymore,” you told him firmly. “No shitty boss, no shitty futon, none of that.”
“Ah, you’re right,” he sighed, then a sly smirk creeped across his lips. “I might be more inclined to sleep in my own bed if I had a pretty girl in it, though.”
“A pretty girl?” You echoed pointedly.
“Just one.” Kun picked up your hand to kiss the back of it. “Just you, pretty girl.”
“Are you closing?”
“Mhm. I can give you my key if you don’t want to wait around here after your set.”
“Is it a dance night?”
“Mhm.”
You closed your eyes as you thought, enjoying the feeling of him pressing more kisses to your hand and fingers. “I’ll hang out.”
“Can’t wait.”
When your eyes fluttered open, they landed on the futon again, and your mind was still stuck in that bygone era that Kun had told you about, after his band broke up. You squeezed his hand to get his attention. “I forgot to tell you—Mark and I went to this guitar shop the other day.”
Kun sat up to look at you as you spoke, keeping a gentle hold on your hand. “Oh yeah? He get anything?”
“A new capo, but uh, the shop was actually owned by Yuta.”
His eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Really?”
“And Taeyong was there too.”
“A two-for-one, huh? Lucky you,” he laughed, easing back into his office chair again. “I think you’re just missing Jaehyun now?”
“Yeah,” you nodded. “Kun, why did you make it sound like your band broke up because you guys didn’t make it? They told us about Jaehyun having kids…”
“It never felt right to me to blame the kids, or even Jaehyun.” Kun ran a hand through his hair.
You frowned. “I don’t think it’s blaming anybody to say that he wanted to be a dad more than he wanted to be a rockstar. That’s just… what being a person is like. One day you want to be one thing, and then something happens and you want to be something else.”
“You make some good points,” he admitted. “I’ve never thought of it like that.”
“Not just a pretty face, hm?” You teased, getting to your feet.
He stood up as well, pecking your cheek. “Never said you were, baby. Beauty and brains, of course.”
You grabbed the back of his neck, pulling his lips to yours. As his mouth moved with yours sweetly, one of his hands cupped your cheek, the cool metal of his rings resting against your skin. A timid knock came at the closed door, and he let out a low groan against your lips. As Kun pulled back to address whoever was at the door, you peppered barely-there kisses along his jaw and neck.
“If you’re Yangyang, fuck off!” He called out, grip tightening on your hip when you nipped just above the collar of his venue crew t-shirt, on the front of his throat.
“No, not Yangyang,” Yangyang replied, his voice garbled as he deepened it in an attempt to disguise it. “Uh, I’m uhm, Sicheng! Yangyang wanted me to ask you about—” He was cut off by a hacking cough, then resumed in his normal voice, though a little strained, “Fuck! God! How does he do that? Felt like I was deepthroating my own tongue! Ugh!”
You burst into laughter, immediately trying to muffle it behind your hands.
“Woah! You got a girl in there, Kun?” His shit-eating grin was audible through the door. “We always joked about what the futon was for, but I didn’t know you got down like that, old man! Do you want me to leave? ‘Cause like—”
“Yes, I would like for you to leave because you are giving me a migraine!” Kun finally cut him off loudly.
“Alright, alright! Don’t need to tell me twice!” Yangyang acquiesced. “Doing this Again is going to start their soundcheck soon, so maybe keep it down? Or don’t, it should actually be the perfect cover for any—”
“Liu Yangyang!”
“Bye!”
Finally, you could hear the sound of his footsteps retreating down the hallway, and lowered your hand from your mouth, letting out a few giggles. Kun wiped his face from forehead to chin, red with anger. You could even spot a vein on his neck that wasn’t always visible.
“I’m going to kill that boy one day,” he swore, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I think I understand vampires now.”
He blinked at you. “What?”
You poked his neck vein. “I get it…”
He grabbed your hand with both of his, bringing it down, away from his neck. “And on that very normal note, pretty girl, you have a soundcheck to do.”
“You love that I’m extremely normal and say very normal things,” you teased, heading towards the door.
Before you could make it, he tugged on your hand, bringing you back into his arms. He dipped his head to attach his lips to your neck, teeth finding a spot that had already been fading. He finished it off with one last tender kiss to the area.
“There,” he murmured. “We can match.”
“I am definitely late for soundcheck now,” you whispered, reaching for the doorknob behind you with one hand even as you pulled him in for one more kiss with the other.
“Have fun, baby.”
With one last peck, you opened the office door and slipped out. Amazingly, you didn’t bump into Yangyang in the hallway. Instead, you quite literally tripped over him turning the corner out of the hallway and into the main floor area.
“Shit! Sorry, Yang!” You apologized as you stumbled over the employee who was squatted down behind the wall.
“Wait, Y/N?!” He didn’t even seem to care that you had just knocked him to the floor, scrambling to get to his feet and follow you as you hurried towards the stage.
The rest of your band was already set up for soundcheck, tuning their instruments and making other tweaks.
“Bathroom’s over there,” Chenle deadpanned into his mic, pointing to the ladies’ room on the opposite side of the floor.
“I peed and then got caught up talking to Kun.” You jumped up onto the stage, grabbing your in-ears and pack that somebody had already gotten out for you. “You see, people can travel from one place to another using these things attached to our torsos called legs.”
Jisung giggled from behind you as Chenle rolled his eyes. Yangyang was still looking between you and the hallway, obviously bewildered.
“You were in there when I was talking to him?” Yangyang asked, face screwed up in confusion.
“Yeah.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“There wasn’t anything for me to say?” You retorted, putting in one of your in-ears. “He was pissed at you, dude.”
“What were you guys talking about?”
“Retro Rewind.”
Jungwoo interrupted, “As thrilling as this play-by-play of Y/N’s conversation with Kun is, we’ve really got to start our soundcheck, Yang.”
“Sorry, yeah.” Yangyang shook his head, jumping over the ropes that served to divide the main floor from the crew-only entrance to backstage. He disappeared behind the curtain, emerging by his sound equipment just off-stage.
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“Pizza?” Jisung suggested hopefully as soon as you all stumbled into the green room off the stage.
A chorus of agreeable sounds—varying from cheers to grunts—came from around the room, a new rush of energy pumping through your friends at the mention of food.
You packed your bag, but didn’t put your two cents in on the prospective pizza order. They ended up split on what restaurant to go to, and looked to you to be the tiebreaker.
You held your hands up. “I’m hanging out here. You guys will just have to play rock-paper-scissors or something.”
“You’re staying here?” Jungwoo cocked his head curiously.
“And I won’t be home tonight,” you told Mark specifically.
Mark’s jaw dropped. “He’s here?!”
“Who?” “What?” “Who are you talking about?” “Huh?” The others clambered around you two for a scrap of context.
“Y/N has been seeing a mystery guy who she swears is not an axe murderer, but she refuses to tell me anything about,” your roommate narrowed his eyes at you.
“God, it hasn’t even been a week, and you wonder why I don’t want to tell you anything,” you scoffed.
“Uh, sorry I don’t want you to get axe murdered, dude?”
“If I get axe murdered, you can get up at my funeral and say ‘I told her so.’”
“Come on.” It was surprisingly Chenle who saved you, grabbing Mark’s backpack and yanking him away from you. “I’m hungry and you’re taking too long.”
“Dude!”
Mark flailed as Jungwoo joined in, taking Mark’s hand in his to drag him along too. “Pizza!”
Jisung gave you a quiet wave goodbye as he followed the others, leaving you in a remarkably silent green room. You let out a deep sigh to calm yourself down, then walked out as well. Your bandmates made quick work of hauling Mark out, as you didn’t see or hear any of them when you stepped into the main floor. Keeping close to the wall, you sneaked around to the back office, intending on dropping off your bag before finding Kun. Instead, you found Yangyang in the office, nosing around for something.
“Uh, what are you doing?” You asked, plopping your bag onto the empty office chair.
Yangyang shot to his feet, spinning around to flash you an obviously guilty smile. “Oh, you’re still here.”
“Yeah, I’m hanging out for a bit,” you replied noncommittally. “What are you doing?”
“Close the door?”
You obliged, stepping and shutting the office door behind you. “Okay?”
“Promise not to tell Kun?”
“What are you doing? Booby trapping his office?”
“No, it’s not April Fools yet.”
“You’re going to booby trap his office for April Fools?”
“Pff, no!”
You arched an eyebrow in disbelief. “So what are you doing now?”
“Looking for proof,” he whispered, rubbing his hands together. “I’ve worked here for like three years and the old man’s never had a partner, talked about going on dates, brought anybody around, nothing. Now, in one week, he’s been late to work, come to work with hickeys, had somebody bring him food, has been smiling down at his phone instead of rolling his eyes at it—He’s humming, for fuck’s sake, Y/N! Humming! I’ve never seen him consistently in such a good mood since… ever!”
“Maybe that’s just because you piss him off all the time,” you pointed out.
“But the rest of it!”
“What kind of proof do you think you’re going to find in the office? His diary?” You snorted.
“Ooh, you think?”
You stared at him.
“You’re fucking with me,” he realized. “That’s not funny.”
You were already giggling. “It really is.”
Yangyang pushed the rolling chair out of the way to wake the computer up, cursing when he saw that it was locked.
“Anyway, why are you so pressed about Kun’s love life?” You questioned, watching Yangyang type in wrong password after wrong password.
“Aren’t you curious?” He asked. “I know you haven’t worked here as long, but the man is an enigma. After three years, I feel like I know as much about him as I did on my first day.”
“Have you tried talking to him? Since you’re so curious?”
“Have you?” He retorted, then his face lit up like he’d gotten an idea. He turned away from the computer that he still hadn’t unlocked. “Actually, you do talk to Kun, right? About like, your weekly slot and stuff at least, right?”
“Yeah…?” You answered hesitantly, unsure of where he was going with this.
Yangyang suddenly lunged forward to grab both your hands, smushing them between his as he pleaded with you. “Can you find out for us if he’s seeing anybody? Like, not be super obvious, but try to see if he’ll bring it up? Or say something about them?”
“‘Us?’” You repeated the one word that had caught your attention. “I take it the rest of the crew are in on this too?”
His eyes widened as he seemed to have realized his slip-up, then he grinned. “You’re clever, Kun won’t stand a chance. Thanks!”
“I didn’t say yes!” You yelled after him as he ran out of the office.
With a shake of your head, you walked out of the office as well, quietly shutting the door. Out on the main floor, you milled around for a little bit, ordering a drink from Sicheng at the bar before chatting with a few venue regulars about this and that.
“I’m excited for Retro Rewind,” Sunny, a regular who was a little younger than you, buzzed with excitement, and maybe a bit too much alcohol. “I love seeing you guys and Roses on the same night!” She suddenly gasped. “You should totally do a collab song or something! That would be fucking awesome!”
You laughed, endeared by her enthusiasm as always. “Could be fun. Those guys are pretty cool.”
“Oh my god, don’t look, but he’s totally looking over here!” Tsuki, the other regular that you were talking to, whisper-shouted over the music, grabbing her friend’s arm.
Sunny immediately whipped her head around rather obviously. You also peered around a bit more inconspicuously, curious as to who they were talking about. Sunny must have spotted whoever it was, as she squeaked and ducked her head again. The only person you met eyes with was Kun, who had finally stopped running around and was now calmly watching over the crowd from the back wall. You gave him a little smile before turning back to the two squealing girls in front of you.
“What’s going on?” You asked, swirling your drink around in your glass then taking a sip.
“Sunny thinks the manager is cute,” Tsuki giggled, much to the chagrin of her friend, who belatedly smacked a hand over her mouth.
You choked on the sip that you had just taken, barely avoiding snorting it back out your nose. Thumping yourself on the chest, you managed to swallow it down instead of doing a spit take all over the patrons. Tsuki only laughed even harder as Sunny covered her face.
“You didn’t have to laugh that much,” Sunny whined.
“Sorry, sorry,” you apologized quickly. “Not laughing, just uh, just went down the wrong pipe.”
“She’s just sensitive because I like to tease her about how she comes to a music venue and doesn’t even look at any of the acts, she looks at the manager,” Tsuki explained.
“It’s called practicality!” Sunny huffed, then looked at you hopefully. “Is he single? Do you know?”
“W-Well…” You stammered, trying to figure out what the hell you were even supposed to say right now.
“Oh, he’s totally like, married with five kids or something,” Tsuki snickered, making Sunny even more distraught.
“He doesn’t have a wedding ring!” Sunny argued.
Finally, you decided to go with, “He’s seeing someone.” At the way the girl’s face immediately fell, you awkwardly added, “Sorry, Sunny…”
Tsuki wrapped an arm around her shoulders as Sunny mumbled, “‘S fine, he wasn’t even that cute.”
“Yeah, that’s right,” her friend murmured supportively, patting her on the head. Tsuki looked up at you with a knowing smile. “I think we’re going to get another drink. Thanks for hanging out with us, Y/N.”
“You’re really fucking cool,” Sunny sighed, squeezing your hand as she let Tsuki guide her away.
Skimming your eyes over the crowd, you made eye contact with Kun again, still monitoring the room. You slid off your stool at the bar and shouldered your way through the crowd until you could sidle right up next to him. Leaning back against the wall, you propped up one foot, taking another sip of your drink and watching the crowd too.
“Found Yangyang snooping through the office earlier,” you informed him.
Kun groaned, letting his head drop back against the concrete wall with a thunk. “Do I need to check my chair for thumbtacks now or some shit?”
“That’s what I thought too, but you’re safe until April Fools.”
“So what was he doing today?”
“Looking for proof that you’re seeing someone.”
“And did he find any?”
“Nope. Well, technically yes, since I was in there, but he didn’t realize it,” you said with a grin. “He recruited me to try to covertly get information about it from you.”
“Kid’s a fucking idiot.”
“Not completely, the reasons he gave as to why he thinks you’re seeing someone were pretty observant.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Let’s see… Hickeys, you’ve been late to work, had a mysterious person bring you food, and are apparently smiling at your phone and humming.” You listed them off on the fingers of one hand. “I think if he doesn’t find proof of you seeing someone, Yang is going to start doomsday prepping.”
He rolled his eyes. “He needs a hobby.”
“Maybe he should take up crochet or something.”
“Anything to keep him out of my business.” Kun crossed his arms over his chest. “Is everything okay with those regulars you were talking to?”
“Sunny and Tsuki?” You tried to find them in the crowd, spotting them sitting in stools that they had scooted together at the bar, Sunny already looking much livelier again. “Yeah, I think she’ll be fine.”
“Good. What was it? Too much to drink?”
“Probably a little of that.” You leaned in towards him, your shoulder pressing against his as you lowered your voice, “She asked me if you were single.”
“Wait, really?” Puffs of air washed over your cheek as he chuckled.
“What are you laughing about?”
“Sorry—What did you say?” There was still a curl of humor in his tone.
“I said you were seeing someone.” You squinted at him as he started laughing again. “What?”
“Not laughing at you, baby, sorry,” he said through chuckles, his hand that was closer to the wall sneaking under your jacket and pulling you closer by the hip. “Just thinking about how many guys have asked me or the other staff about you. It’s kinda funny that it happened to you.”
“Oh? And what did you tell them?”
“That it’s against our policy to give out private information on our talent, of course.”
“Ooh, how professional,” you teased, biting on your straw.
“I am nothing if not a professional,” he smiled, thumb running over the skin just above your waistband.
You checked the time. “Only half an hour left.”
“Counting the minutes, pretty girl?”
“Until I’ve got you all to myself? Shamelessly.”
“Me too.” He looked at his watch. “Twenty-nine minutes.”
You let out a melodramatic sigh, looking around at where the other venue staff were. There was no line at the merch counter, Ten scrolling on his phone with his feet kicked up. “I’m going to go bother Ten for a bit. I’m afraid this drink is starting to taste like I should kiss you stupid right now.”
Kun tightened his hold on your hip, reaching for your drink. “Can I?”
You let him take the half-empty glass. He shook it first, the ice cubes clinking around, then he drank from the rim. A small sip, then another one. He tilted his head back and forth, humming thoughtfully before nodding, “You’re right. It does taste like that.”
That was all the permission you needed, grabbing his face with two hands and eagerly connecting your lips. He still tasted like your slightly sweet drink, and you greedily took kiss after kiss, biting down on his bottom lip. Kun groaned softly into your mouth, letting his thumb dip below your waistband then back up. Your head was spinning as your blood roared in your ears and you wished he’d just drop the fucking drink to have both hands on you, shattered glass and spilled alcohol be damned.
To his credit, he didn’t drop the glass, even when you suddenly pushed him back against the wall, kissing the column of his throat instead. When you lightly bit at an unmarred spot, he hissed and laughed, pinching your side.
“You were serious about that vampire thing, huh?” He teased. “Menace.”
“Who, me?” You asked innocently, taking the drink back and finishing it off.
He chuckled, using two hands on your hips to turn the two of you around, pressing you back against the wall now. Your free hand bunched the fabric of the front of his shirt, pulling his mouth to yours again. Kun had just grabbed your chin with one hand, tongue entwining with yours, when you felt him suddenly turn away from you. You instinctually whined at the loss, trying to pull at his shoulder as your eyes fluttered open, pout already forming on your kiss-swollen lips.
“—just can’t play grab-ass here, guys.” You caught the tail-end of what Yangyang was saying as he seemed to be giving some pre-rehearsed spiel, his eyes squeezed closed as he talked. Once he was finished, he opened his eyes, immediately jumping back as he registered who exactly he was talking to, “Jesus Christ! Ahh! What the hell?! What the fuck?!”
“Shut up.” Kun scowled at him.
“No?!” Yangyang replied indignantly. “What are you doing?!”
“Telling you to shut up.”
“Y/N!” The sound tech looked at you next, horrified. “You really want to do this?”
“Excuse me?” Kun snorted.
“Kun, come on dude, you’re better than this—”
“Excuse me?!” You pushed past Kun, fully intending on giving Yangyang a shiner.
Kun held you back, but you could tell that he was getting pissed too. “Yangyang, what exactly do you think is going on?”
“You’re cheating on your new girl with Y/N!” Yangyang gestured wildly. “Y/N, I totally thought you were a girl’s girl, by the way—”
“Shut up!” Kun yelled, loud enough that a few patrons even looked over. He glared at his employee, “You’re an idiot. I’m not cheating on anybody with Y/N.”
His face screwed up with confusion. “So you’re not seeing anybody? Then what was all—”
“It’s me!” You finally blurted out. “He’s seeing me! We’re seeing each other! Fucking Christ, Yang, you saw us making out and can’t process that?”
Yangyang blinked at you. “But he’s so… old?”
This time you had to grab Kun’s arm to keep him from doing something, and the sound tech skittered back a couple more steps.
“Go away, Yangyang,” Kun demanded sharply.
“God, can’t believe the couple Ten asked me to break up was you guys,” he shuddered, walking off.
You and Kun exchanged a knowing look. “Definitely not a coincidence…” You scoffed.
Looking back to the merch counter, you saw Ten wiping tears from his undereye, still laughing as he held onto the counter for stability.
“Does Ten have a car?” You asked.
“Yes, why?”
“I want to key it.”
Kun laughed, wrapping an arm around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder. “As fun as that would be, how about I schedule him and Yangyang for back-to-back closing-opening shifts for a full week next month instead?”
“Oh, boo.” You let out a huff, leaning back against him affectionately. “Vandalism and property damage would’ve been so cathartic.”
He kissed your cheek apologetically. “I know, baby, I’m sorry.”
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You were gently pulled out of sleep by a quiet tune and fingertips skimming over your forearm. Yawning, you squinted an eye open, watching Kun’s fingers trace the lines of your tattoos. With your mind still foggy with sleep, you listened to what he was humming.
“Hey…” You mumbled, shifting onto your back.
“Hey,” he repeated humorously, pressing a soft kiss to your temple.
“You were humming it again.” You rubbed your eye.
“Did I wake you up? Sorry.”
“No, it’s fine. That song…” You frowned. “It’s not from somewhere?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Hm.” You repeated the tune, your throat a little scratchy this early in the morning. “It’s nice.”
“You think?”
Rolling over, you buried your face in the crook of his neck. “Mhm.”
Kun rested a hand on your back. “Your phone was going off, by the way. You were still sleeping, I put it on silent, hope you don’t mind.”
You let out a big sigh, blindly reaching out towards the nightstand where your phone was. He grabbed it for you, placing it in your seeking hand. Turning your head just enough to see your phone screen, you saw three missed calls from Mark and a text.
“He better be dead,” you groaned. “Or I’m going to kill him.”
Opening the text, you saw that it was only one word, and from around two a.m., several hours before the phone calls.
[mark: KUN????????????????????????????]
[you: wrong number?]
You decided that you’d call him back if he didn’t text back in ten minutes.
That determination was useless, however, as he almost immediately called you. You declined it, texting him instead.
[you: DUDE are you fucking dying or something??]
[mark: the axe murderer is KUN????????]
[you: did yangyang text the whole venue gc or smth???]
[you: also he’s not an axe murderer jfc]
Another incoming call, which you once again declined.
[you: im going to block you if you keep calling me]
[mark: ARE YOU WITH HIM RN?!!!!?!??!?!?!]
[you: girl where tf else would i be? i told you i wasn’t coming home]
[mark: ok i did a few calming breaths]
[mark: idk what ur talking abt w yangyang but we figured it out at pizza last night. chenle saw ur FRESH HICKEY AFTER COMING OUT OF KUNS OFFICE]
[you: i hate to sound like my parents rn but maybe u guys actually should get real jobs and leave me tf alone]
[you: average unemployed friend behavior tbh]
[mark: bro the call is coming from inside the unemployment office??]
[you: actually it’s coming from kun’s bed rn xx]
Finally, your phone was silent, and you harshly dropped it back onto the nightstand. You only had a few moments of peace before a different ringer was going off. Letting out a guttural groan, you smushed your face into your pillow as Kun reached over you to grab his phone.
“Morning, Mark,” he answered, sounding very amused.
Your head snapped up automatically, eyes going wide with fear at whatever the hell your friend was saying. Kun rested one of his hands behind his head as he leaned back against his headboard, listening with interest.
“Oh, I thought you had a question about work,” he said with a grin. “You know, it’s against our policy to give out private information about our talent.”
You covered your face with your hands, shaking your head.
“Mhm, see you, Mark.”
As Kun set his phone back down, you lamented into your palms, “So much for keeping it private at first.”
“Yeah, I think we forfeited that last night,” he reminded you, pressing a kiss to your shoulder.
You took your face out of your hands to properly argue. “Not my fault you looked like that.”
“I thought it was the drink?”
“Mm, both.”
He chuckled. “Anyway, did I mention that I’m off today?”
“All day?” You looked at him hopefully.
“All day,” he confirmed. “I don’t have to be back at the venue until tomorrow night.”
“We’re practicing our Retro Rewind set later, but other than that, I’m free today too.” You beamed. “Can we go somewhere?”
“Somewhere?”
You shrugged. “I don’t know. Somewhere other than the venue or your apartment.”
“I do have some errands to run…” Kun mused. “Groceries, the laundromat, I have a package to drop off at the post office—”
“No, I mean like a real date!”
“There we go, just wanted you to use your words, baby,” he snickered, pinching your bottom lip. “You’re pouting.”
“You’re being mean to me.” You rolled onto your back, your elbows getting tired from propping up your head for that long.
“Aw, I’m sorry.” He leaned down to kiss you. “Get dressed, I know where to take you.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Not the grocery store, laundromat, or post office?”
“A real date, I promise.”
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The destination Kun had in mind was apparently within walking distance, as the two of you took off down the sidewalks hand-in-hand.
“So what’s your day job?” He asked.
You weren’t expecting that. “What?”
“What do you do when you’re not doing music? You know, to pay rent and stuff?”
“Oh, I work with a temp agency and a babysitting agency. Picking up gigs here and there, you know?”
He almost seemed amused. “Really?”
“Yeah.” You touched your nose jewelry habitually. “I know I don’t look like your average office worker or childcare professional, but I clean up good, okay? Take out the nose ring and eyebrow piercing, put on some longsleeves, they never know. That’s why I don’t dye my hair crazy colors.”
“What sort of places have you temped at?”
“Lots of different places.” You hummed as you thought through a brief list of the various businesses that you’d worked at. “I usually do their filing, answer phones, that kind of stuff. I’m really only there for a few weeks at a time. I think the longest place I worked at was for… three or four months? That was actually at a music studio, so it was pretty cool.”
“Meet anybody cool?”
“There were some big names that came through. I got everyone’s coffee.” You shook your head, then looked at Kun curiously. “Have you ever thought about working somewhere other than the venue?”
“Oh, plenty of times,” he sighed. His face turned contemplative as he went on to admit, “I didn’t tell you the whole truth before. I tried to get back into songwriting and composing dozens of times over the years. I tried everything, every process out there, every tip and trick I could find—nothing. I couldn’t even remix our old tracks into something palatable. The staff at the venue only know I used to play the keyboard because when I finally gave up, I sold mine to Dejun.”
You couldn’t help the frown on your face when he described the creative block he had faced. “When was that?”
“Three, maybe four years ago now?” He seemed much less perturbed by it than you, like he had long accepted his fate. “I like working at the venue because I like being in the scene, even if I can’t contribute anything new to it.”
“That tune that you’ve been humming—”
“—Is not going to go anywhere. That happened before. I would think I had something, but as soon as I sat down to write, nothing,” he insisted calmly. “It’s fine.”
“So you just… got rid of everything?”
“It’s not like I denounced music forever,” he chuckled, squeezing your hand. “Just changed my focus.”
You thought about your own band, about all the half-written songs in your notes that you were working on, the demos you had recorded on your phone that you hoped to release someday. Would you let it all go one day too?
“We’re here,” Kun announced, gesturing to the business you had found yourself in front of.
“Mini golf?” You strained to read the faded sign.
“Unless it’s not good enough. I mean, I’ve got a long list of things that aren’t the post office…”
“No, Kun, this is perfect,” you laughed. “Let’s do it.”
“Great.” He smiled, pecking your cheek before grabbing the front door for you.
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Tonight was Retro Rewind, and the venue was abuzz with excitement. Doing this Again! was opening, and you were on stage waiting for the rest of your band to join you for your soundcheck. The staff were all bustling around getting set up, and you were at your keyboard, absorbed in your own world as you played around with a tune that had been stuck in your head.
Kun slowed to a stop in front of you, taking his headset off to listen with fascination. “That’s…”
“The tune you were humming. Plus some other stuff,” you confirmed, pausing your playing for the moment. “I figured since you weren’t going to do anything with it… I started messing around with it.” You jerked your head for him to join you. “C’mere.”
He obliged, hopping up on stage and letting you drag him behind your keyboard with you as you explained your idea. “I think it’ll be better layered. Can you play it an octave down?”
To your relief and delight, he didn’t argue, hands immediately finding familiar places on the keys to your left. As both of you started playing, you listened carefully.
“Mm… A step down?” You requested, and he immediately complied. You grinned. “Hell yeah.”
“And then it’s…” He trailed off as he followed your lead into the part that you had added onto his tune, playing it entirely by ear.
“Mhm, and then I was thinking you repeat and I would—”
He did as you said, repeating the melody as you added even more on top, making him absolutely beam. “Alright!”
“But then I get stuck there.” You frowned and took your hands off the keys. “On the bridge.”
“That little flair you had going…” Kun said carefully. “If you slowed it down, and dropped it a full octave…” He played a portion of your part again on his half of the keyboard exactly as he had described. “Could be something.”
“Play it again?”
“Mm?” He made an indicative noise as he went to do so.
You listened and contemplated it, slowly nodding. “Yeah, I liked that. Really moody.”
“You got any lyrics yet?”
“Nah, just messin’ with it.” You started from the beginning again. “If that’s alright with you. I was planning on having more to show you when I asked your permission to make a real song with your tune.”
Kun blinked at you, his hands sliding off the keys and hanging by his sides as he stared at you with wonder. “You really… want to?”
“Yeah, of course.” Your head bounced to the beat as you skipped to the moody bridge that he had just suggested. “I really like this, the more I hear it. That was a good—ack!”
Discordant notes rang out as Kun had surprised you by throwing his arms around you. You took a step back to stay upright, wrapping your arms around him too, rubbing his back.
“Uh, hi?” You murmured uncertainly.
“Yes, you have my permission. I-I’d be over the moon.” He cupped your cheeks, eyes sparkling as he looked at you. “God, you’re so perfect, baby.”
You let out a sputtering laugh, ducking your head as your face heated up from his adoring gaze. “Kun, fucking hell, you’ve got to warn me.”
“You never warn me.”
“Before doing what?”
“This.”
“Eh?!” You made an indignant noise, looking around at your general demeanor. “What am I doing? Breathing?”
“Pretty much, yeah.”
“Okay, I can’t warn you every time I breathe.”
He snickered, giving you a quick peck. You huffed, immediately leaning back in for another, longer kiss, hooking one arm around his neck.
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Giving a final wave to the audience, you ran off the stage arm-in-arm with Jungwoo, laughing and grinning madly. Your bandmates all followed, hugging and cheering. You all couldn’t take up space there for too long though as the next act got ready to go on. You hastily gave Roses for Eyes your best before heading further backstage. Chenle, Jungwoo, and Mark packed up their instruments and idly chatted with a couple of the acts that were hanging out in the cramped space. Everybody was sharing what instruments they could, meaning that the drumset and keyboard were staying onstage, which made yours and Jisung’s lives a bit easier.
“We’re gonna go catch some of Roses’ set,” Mark announced to the room in general, tapping your arm in a silent indication for you to join the rest of them. A few of the other performers who wouldn’t be going on until later got up as well, and you fell into the group too.
When you got backstage, however, your eyes were habitually searching for someone, and you quietly slipped away. The office door was thrown open as soon as you got to it, and a breathless smile came to Kun’s face when he saw you.
“Hey, I wanted to catch you when you came off stage, but there were way too many people.” He pecked your forehead. “You did so good, baby.”
“Thanks.” You kissed him on the lips. “Do you have time to watch RFE’s set? Or—”
“Hey, sorry.” Ten’s head poked around the corner into the hallway. He pointed over his shoulder into the main room. “Uh, these guys are saying they know you?”
Kun offered you an apologetic look, stepping past you down the hall. “Sorry, everyone says they know the manager. I’ll be—”
“Not you.”
With Ten’s gaze focused on you, you pointed to yourself in surprise. “Me?”
He nodded. You exchanged a confused glance with Kun, but as soon as you saw one of their heads poking over Ten’s shoulder, your jaw dropped.
“Nono, it’s fine, Ten,” you informed him hastily. He stepped aside to let the gaggle of men in.
Kun was possibly even more baffled than you. “What are you guys doing here?”
“We were invited,” Yuta informed him with a wide grin, gesturing to you.
“Oh my god, I didn’t think you’d actually come!” You bounced up and down with excitement, hugging him, then Taeyong, who was still in his kindly teacher attire.
Taeyong directed your attention to a figure at the back of the group. “We brought somebody.”
The man went to introduce himself, “Hey, I’m—”
“Jaehyun! Ah, sorry!” You slapped a hand over your mouth, thoroughly embarrassed.
“They said you might do that.” Jaehyun smirked, offering you a hand to shake. “It’s really nice to meet you, Y/N. You were awesome up there.”
“Thank you. It’s so cool to meet you.”
“Good to see you again, Y/N.” Johnny squeezed past Jaehyun to wrap you in a bearhug.
“Johnny! Hey!” Your greeting turned in a squeal of surprise as he lifted you off the ground. “Woah!”
Kun cleared his throat, appraising eye scanning over his former bandmates. “And uh, any particular reason I wasn’t told about this reunion?”
“We wanted to surprise you!” Taeyong explained as Johnny put you back down.
“Well, you succeeded,” Kun chuckled and crossed his arms, but you could tell that his smile didn’t reach his eyes, his gaze locked on where Johnny’s hand lingered on your back.
Giving Johnny one last friendly pat on the arm, you stepped back over to Kun’s side, eyes shining as you looked them all over. “Seriously, this is so cool. When was the last time you were all together?”
They looked at each other as they thought. Jaehyun asked, “It was probably for Juju’s birthday, right?” There were murmurs of agreement, and Jaehyun gave you a firm nod. “So, yeah, a couple months ago for my daughter’s fifth.”
“We’re going out after this, you guys should totally come!” You offered.
“Oh, your band?” Yuta surmised.
“The home team; us, Roses, some of the crew…” You trailed off, your eyes widening as soon as you realized your mistake. You winced as you turned to Kun, “Sorry, is that gonna be okay? I wasn’t thinking—”
“It’s fine,” he reassured you, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you closer. “They all need something new to talk about anyway.”
The others exchanged a knowing look, Yuta pointing at Kun with a smile. “Mystery guy, I presume?”
“Wh—Ugh, you seriously remember that?” You groaned as Taeyong giggled behind his hand.
Kun glanced between the three of you, confusion apparent. “What?”
“When Mark and I went to his shop, Mark was freaking out about the ‘mystery guy’ I was seeing,” you explained. “I can’t believe you guys remember that.”
“You two were funny.” Yuta shrugged.
“Anyway, I think Roses for Eyes started their set,” Johnny cut in. “The drummer is one of my clients and I told him I would watch.”
Everyone acquiesced, starting to filter out of the cramped hallway and back to the main floor. You laced your fingers with Kun’s, making sure to not lose him in the crowd. He squeezed your hand back, following your lead.
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heartsriki · 10 days ago
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ALWAYS YOU ⌇타박상
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pairing ᝰ jungwon x fem!reader — featuring.. hyuka mentioned | word count: 2.7k+
⌇ … warnings & genre ↺ fluff, angst, school au, misunderstandings, bullying, physical fights not between reader and jw, bruises mentioned, kissing, cussing.
synopsis — after a misunderstanding two years ago you have lived your school life in solitude. At least you tried too but yang jungwon just won't give up! will he continue to cling to you or will another misunderstanding take him away?
lee's ₊˚⊹ ᰔ comment ┊I really loved writing this :( I can't seem to write fics without misunderstandings lol.. I'm also trying to write longer fics slowly, I can't believe I wrote 2.7k words I got carried away.. also tysm to my moots and non-moots! the reblogs and comments make me giggle :)
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For a girl who barely spoke a word, you had a reputation that clung to you like a shadow—dark, persistent, and nearly impossible to shake. Around the school, your name was passed around in hushed tones, tethered to stories people wouldn’t normally want attached to their identity.
The rumors swirled, painting a picture of you that wasn’t entirely fair, but you never bothered to correct them. The “incident” two years ago was the foundation to all of this— a fight you didn’t start but somehow took all the blame for, thanks to a girl who played the victim flawlessly in front of a crowd. From that day on, you were the one to avoid. And you didn’t mind. Solitude came easier than the tangled mess of trying to prove yourself innocent.
But, of course, there was one person who clinged to you despite of all of this.
Yang Jungwon.
The boy who seemed oblivious to the rumors. The one person who approached you time and time again. He was everything you weren’t—loved by everyone, a model student, and the poster child for perfection. So why, of all people, did he keep showing up like right now?
“Hey, Y/N, what are you up to?”
Jungwon’s familiar voice broke through your concentration, and before you could react, he was leaning over your shoulder to peek at your notes. His smile was so casual, like he belonged there, completely ignoring the bubble of isolation you carefully maintained.
You nearly jumped out of your seat, glancing around frantically to ensure no one else noticed him. “Go away, Jungwon,” you hissed, your voice low but firm.
Instead of leaving, he sighed dramatically and walked around the table, dropping into the chair across from you. “Why? Are you waiting for a friend?”
You gave him a sharp, unimpressed look, one that he immediately understood.
“Right, sorry,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck with an apologetic smile. For a moment, he looked genuinely sheepish, but then his expression brightened like he’d just remembered something important. “Oh! I had something to ask you.”
You raised a skeptical eyebrow. “Ask me, and then go away.”
His grin widened, and for some reason, you didn’t like the look in his eyes. “Do you have a partner for the Valentine’s Day event?”
At first, the words didn’t fully register. You stared at him blankly, too preoccupied with figuring out why he was even sitting here. But the second it clicked, you choked on your breath, launching into a fit of loud coughing.
When you finally recovered, you stared at him in disbelief. “Jungwon, are you crazy?” you whisper-yelled, leaning closer to ensure no one overheard. “You do realize that’s for couples, right?”
His reaction was unreadable. His throat bobbed as he gulped, and his gaze dropped to the papers scattered in front of you. “Oh? Is it? I didn’t notice… My bad.”
His voice was soft, his words almost too casual, but the faint pout tugging at his lips gave him away. Without waiting for your reply, he stood abruptly. “Well, sorry for bothering you.”
And just like that, he walked away, leaving you frozen in place.
Your mind raced, replaying the scene over and over again. There was no way Jungwon didn’t know. He was on the committee that planned these kinds of events. He had to have known.
“He’s so irritating,” you muttered under your breath, shaking your head and trying to refocus on your notes.
But even as you went back to studying, you couldn’t ignore the warmth creeping up your neck, the undeniable heat spreading across your face.
Not even two hours later, you were at the same spot.
The library was quieter than usual that afternoon, with only the occasional rustle of pages and soft whispers floating in the air. You had taken refuge in your favorite corner by the window, hoping for some peace after the strange interaction with Jungwon earlier.
But, as if on cue, a shadow fell across your table. Again.
“Hey,” came his familiar voice, soft but somehow still startling.
You looked up, already narrowing your eyes. “What now, Jungwon? Seriously you don't take a hint.”
He raised his hands in mock surrender, a playful grin tugging at his lips. “Relax. I come in peace.”
You weren’t convinced, but you knew he wouldn’t go away. To your surprise, instead of hovering or leaning over your shoulder like earlier, he pulled out a chair and sat down next to you this time, placing a small brown paper bag on the table.
“What’s that?” you asked, nodding toward it suspiciously.
He slid it toward you. “An apology.”
“For?”
“For, you know, earlier. Asking you something dumb and making it weird.” He avoided your gaze, scratching the back of his neck like he always did when he was nervous.
Curiosity got the better of you, and you opened the bag to find a small container of chocolate-covered strawberries inside. Your eyebrows shot up. “You bribing me with food now?”
“Is it working?”
You rolled your eyes, trying to keep a blank face but a small smile tugged at the corners of your lips before you could stop it. “You’re ridiculous.”
“I’ll take that as a yes,” he said, leaning back in his chair with a satisfied expression.
For a few moments, the two of you sat in an unexpected but comfortable silence. The sunlight streaming through the window cast a golden glow over his features, and you hated how your eyes lingered on him longer than they should.
“So,” he began, breaking the quiet, “why do you keep pushing people away?”
His question was so abrupt, it caught you completely off guard. Your head snapped up, and you stared at him, wide-eyed. “Excuse me?”
“I mean,” he said quickly as if trying to soften the blow, “you’re smart, funny—well when you’re not threatening to kill me—and honestly, you’re kind of cool. But you keep everyone at arm’s length. Why?”
You blinked, unsure how to respond. No one had ever asked you that. Not like this. Not with genuine curiosity in their voice.
“Surely you've heard things about me by now,” you said finally, your tone clipped as you looked away.
Jungwon seemed confused with your answer, but he didn’t push. Instead, he reached across the table and tapped the edge of your notebook. “Mm. I don’t think I have, tell me? Maybe?.”
You frowned, meeting his gaze. His eyes held something you couldn’t quite place—something soft, warm, and persistent.
“You should just stay away,” you muttered, trying to dismiss the subject.
“Don't do that…” he said, his voice quieter now, almost tender.
You opened your mouth to reply, but no words came out. Because the truth was, you didn’t know what to say.
Jungwon leaned back in his chair, a small smile playing on his lips. “Well, for what it’s worth, I’m not going anywhere. So, you’re stuck with me, whether you like it or not.”
You scoffed, shaking your head, but you couldn’t stop the warmth blooming in your chest—or the way your heart betrayed you with its quickened pace. “You’re such an idiot for a top student,” you mumbled, but the words lacked their usual bite.
Jungwon only grinned, his eyes sparkling with something that made your stomach flip. “Yeah? Do you like idiots?.”
And for the first time, you didn’t have a comeback.
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The gym field buzzed with activity, laughter, and the rhythmic pounding of feet against the track. Today was the outside gym event—a day you had been dreading for weeks.
As you trudged toward your assigned group, whispers followed you like a persistent echo. You tuned them out, keeping your head low until the coach’s voice rang out like a firecracker.
“Alright, this activity requires duos! Everyone, find a partner and line up!”
Panic surged through you as you looked around. Pairs were forming fast—friends clasping arms, strangers locking eyes and nodding. Everyone but you. It didn’t take long for the coach to notice you standing there, alone and staring at the ground.
“Ah, Kai is absent,” he muttered, scanning the field. “Jungwon! Over here!”
Your head snapped up at the name.
Jungwon jogged over from the track, his face glistening with sweat but still managing to beam like it was the best day of his life.
“Hey, Coach, what’s up?”
“We need you to partner with L/N for this activity. Can’t do it solo.”
Jungwon’s gaze flickered to you, and almost immediately, he grinned. “Sure thing.”
“Shit.” You said under your breath.
He made his way to you, his grin never faltering, though his breath came in short bursts. “Hey, Y/N. Ready to crush this thing?”
You sighed, still refusing to meet his eyes. “You should’ve said no.”
The whispers around you grew louder now, all focused on the odd pairing of you and Jungwon. You knew this wasn’t good for him—not for someone as well-liked as he was.
Jungwon, oblivious to—or maybe just indifferent to—the stares, shrugged casually. “Why would I do that? Can’t let you be on your own.”
His words made you glance up at him. His ears were red, and he was pointedly not looking at you. You assumed it was just from his earlier run. Before you could retort, the coach strode over, handing out supplies.
“Alright, teams, grab your bag and rope for the duo beanbag relay!”
Jungwon’s face lit up with amusement as he looked at the gear, and then at you.
“Oh,” he said, the corners of his mouth twitching into a mischievous smile. “This is gonna be fun.”
You could already feel the awkwardness seeping in as the realization dawned on both of you. The proximity was about to get really awkward.
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As expected, you and Jungwon lost. Not because of Jungwon, but because of the proximity between you two. The way his hand rested over your shoulder for momentum, the way he whispered in your ear to calm your anxiousness, and the constant stares and murmurs from everyone around you—it was too much. It all ended with both of you falling at the last minute due to your distractions.
When the event ended, you bolted from the crowd, heading to the courtyard to be alone.
You felt like crying. That was so embarrassing—not just for you, but for Jungwon too. What would people say about him? Would his reputation be affected because of you?
You didn’t stop running until you found a water fountain tucked away in solitude. Brushing the strands of hair from your face, you leaned over to drink. Just as you felt the cool water hit your lips, you heard footsteps behind you. You turned around quickly.
“What the hell was that pitiful shitshow?”
Of course. It was Jungwon’s so-called fan club—a group of delusional girls who were utterly infatuated with him.
You muttered a curse under your breath, already knowing what was about to happen. “Not now.”
The leader of the group scoffed, turning briefly to her posse for approval. “We’ve told you time and time again to stay away from Jungwon. And now you injure him because you couldn’t run a few yards? Do you think I’m a fucking joke?”
You stared at her with a plain, uninterested expression. “I told you, I want nothing to do with him.”
She smirked mockingly. “Right… sure. One more chance, or you’ll regret it,” she said, turning to leave.
Something about her words struck a nerve. The way she thought she could control him—or anyone, for that matter—was too much for you. You couldn’t hold back.
“You’d think after all this time you’d stop being delusional and get yourself a real boyfriend.”
She stopped in her tracks and turned to face you, her expression morphing from shock to rage. Before you could react, she lunged at you with a punch.
Instinctively, you defended yourself and fought back. Within moments, students turned the corner and formed a circle around you, chanting and screaming.
You were so focused on the fight that you didn’t notice Jungwon pushing through the crowd until he and a few others separated you from the girl.
When your vision cleared, you realized how battered she looked. You hadn’t even noticed the stinging pain in your own hands and face, still numbed by the adrenaline. Looking up, you expected to see anger on Jungwon’s face, but instead, his eyes were filled with sadness and worry.
He grabbed your hand, ignoring the whistles and murmurs behind you as he pulled you away.
You didn’t say anything as he led you toward the infirmary. You didn’t need to—your thoughts were loud enough. You knew what was coming. He was going to be angry. He was going to misunderstand you, just like everyone else. He was going to leave you, like everyone else.
When you reached the infirmary, Jungwon guided you to a bed. “Sit and wait,” he said curtly.
You obeyed, glancing at him briefly before turning your attention to your bruised hands. As you brought them closer to inspect the cuts, you winced at the burning sensation.
Jungwon returned with supplies and sat beside you, placing them down. He was quiet, his face unreadable, and the tension was unbearable. You hated this. You hated how upset he seemed.
And yet, you hated yourself more—for pushing him away for so long, for the possibility that he might finally leave. The thought of never seeing him pop up at your desk unannounced, hearing his one-sided conversations in the library or even his stupid flirty remarks was enough to make your eyes well up.
Before you could stop yourself, tears spilled down your cheeks.
Jungwon looked up from cleaning your knuckles, his eyes widening at the sight of your tears. “Y/N? Hey, what’s wrong?”
You didn’t answer, unable to speak through the sobs.
Setting the supplies aside, he cupped your face gently, his thumbs brushing away the tears. “Why are you crying, gorgeous?”
You blinked up at him, your voice trembling. “I’m so sorry. I swear, she—it wasn’t me, I promise.” Your sobs grew louder, breaking his heart further.
Jungwon’s chest tightened as he took a tissue and wiped your face. “I know it wasn’t you,” he whispered softly.
Your head snapped up, meeting his gaze. “What?”
He smiled faintly and continued tending to your injuries. “I was there from the beginning. I saw her hit you first.”
You stared at him in shock, his words sinking in.
After a moment of silence, he spoke again, his voice tinged with frustration and concern. “I also heard about what happened two years ago. About all the things you’ve been through since. Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve helped you.”
You looked away, guilt washing over you. “Nobody believed me. Why would you?”
Jungwon froze for a moment, then tilted your chin up to meet his gaze. “I’ve always believed in you. From the moment we met—it’s always been you.”
His words left you breathless. For the first time, you wondered if it was finally time to stop running. To stop hiding from what you wanted. You watched him as he took care of you gently, maybe you doubted him.
You were dragged out of your thoughts when he locked eyes with you. The air between you shifted, charged with something unspoken. Jungwon leaned forward, closing the gap, and kissed you gently. You were too shocked to respond at first, but soon, you let go of your fears and kissed him back.
It felt foreign but right. He held you carefully like if he was afraid you’ll go. The room was quiet with just the sighs and soft breathing from the both of you.
When he pulled away, his eyes were full of affection. “How about we hop over the fence and go somewhere hm? Just us.”
You laughed, hitting his shoulder lightly. “You? Skipping school? Don’t make me laugh.”
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BONUS 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
After the fall, Jungwon watched you run off, his instinct to follow immediately thwarted by the crowd gathering around him.
People offered him water and words of praise, but his attention shifted when he overheard a conversation nearby.
“I bet she did that on purpose. Ha, what a bitch.”
Jungwon’s head snapped toward the source of the comment, his jaw tightening. “What did you just say?”
The boy hesitated, startled, but eventually smirked. “Y/N. I mean, everyone knows about her, right? Acts tough, but I bet she’s just a slut looking for attention.”
Before he could think, Jungwon punched the guy, the crack of his fist silencing the crowd.
Ignoring the shocked gasps around him, Jungwon turned and bolted in the direction you had gone. His heart pounded, not just from the run but from the overwhelming need to find you.
He needed you to know. No matter what anyone said or what happened next, his choice would always be you.
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macabrebatz · 1 month ago
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HOW YOU MET THE SLASHERS PT. 2
Author's Note: Hello, everyone! I'm currently moving some of my old fanfiction onto here. These one-shots/drabbles are old (some are far older than others) so some of the writing is very short and in my opinion, not as great as some of my more recent stuff. But I have a soft spot for all of this since I know my younger self was working hard lol. So here’s a mini collection of my old “How You Met” series.
Characters: Brahms Heelshire, Otis Driftwood, Tiffany Valentine, Jack Torrance, Pavi Largo, Art the Clown, Billy Lenz, Luigi Largo, Will Graham
Warning/tags: Canon typical violence mentioned, occasional use of (Y/N) (I tried to get rid of some but there's still a few), not beta read
Word count: 6.1k
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Brahms Heelshire:
You were hired by the Heelshires to take care of their son. When you arrived at the home you were shocked to find a doll instead of an actual person. You decided to shake off the strangeness of the situation.
You followed every rule. You were getting paid so being in a spooky situation wasn't going to deter you away from a good paycheck.
After a couple of weeks, things started to get more strange. A couple of your t-shirts had gone missing, leftover food disappeared, and you could have sworn you heard footsteps walking on the creaky wooden floor at night.
One night you heard a knock. It was faint but it didn't go unnoticed. You got out of bed and put your ear up to the wall. You could hear shuffling.
"Someone's in the house," you thought to yourself.
You made your way to the bedroom door and stepped out into the hallway. The door to Brahms's room was closed. You could've sworn you left it open.
Stepping closer to the door, you gently placed your hand on the nob. You turned it quickly, opening the door. And there he was.
A grown man sat on the end of Brahms's bed. He had a mess of black hair on top of his head and his face was covered by what appeared to be a porcelain mask. You squinted your eyes. The mask resembled the face of the doll that you had grown fond of taking care of. No, it can't be.
You stepped back in shock. Fear and confusion clouded your mind. You wanted to run but your legs were frozen.
"Please don't be scared," the man pleaded.
The voice was gentle and soft. Your mouth fell agape.
"Brahms?" you questioned, stuttering his name.
The man nodded his head.
"So...you are alive."
Otis Driftwood:
You lived down the street from the Firefly family for years so you've known Otis early on. As you got older you started to stay over at their house. Baby Firefly was your best friend and she could tell that you had a crush on her brother.
"You know he likes you too," Baby said as you sat behind her, braiding her curly hair.
"I highly doubt that," you mumbled.
Every time you came over, Otis would shut himself in his room. He never seemed to even be remotely interested in you.
You finished Baby's braid and she turned around to face you.
"Don't believe me? Go talk to him," Baby insisted.
"Go talk to him? About what? We've barely ever spoken to each other," you said.
She took you by the hand without saying anything, dragging you upstairs. The two of you busted through Otis' door uninvited. He sat there watching an episode of The Munsters.
"What the fuck are you two doing in here?" he said aggravated.
You turned to leave but Baby caught you by the arm, pulling you back.
"We want to watch TV since there‘s not one downstairs," Baby said, flopping down on Otis' bed.
You stood there, looking down at your feet.
"Gonna stand there all day or are you gonna sit?" Otis asked, peering up at you.
You hesitantly sat down on the bed by Baby.
"I'm going to go get something to drink," Baby said, hopping back up from the bed.
Before you could insist on going with her, she was gone, leaving you seated by Otis.
"She's not coming back," Otis mumbled.
"Oh, then I probably should go after her," you said.
"Nope. You're watching TV with me," Otis said.
It sounded like an offer, not just a statement.
You nodded your head and sat watching TV with Otis for the rest of the night.
Tiffany Valentine:
You sat down in one of the last couple of seats in the movie theater. It was late at night, 11:45 to be exact. Every year on Halloween night you found yourself sitting in this theater, patiently waiting to watch the annual midnight showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Most years, you would have had someone come with you. Your friends usually would tag along. But this year you were alone. You didn't exactly mind. The energy of the other Rocky Horror fans made up for it.
You had a small bucket of popcorn sitting in your lap, along with a grab bag full of props. The theater would pass them out since audience participation was always encouraged at the showings. You took a sip from your drink and sat it back down in the cup holder on the seat. Glancing around, you took note of how full the theater was. Almost every seat was filled, besides a few seats here and there. One of those empty seats was right beside you.
"Hi, may I sit there?" a voice asked beside you.
Looking up, you saw a woman with wavy blonde hair. She wore a black leather jacket with a bustier underneath, along with tight black pants.
"Oh, of course," you said.
She sat down beside you.
"Thank you," she said with a smile.
"You're welcome."
"If I would've known the theater was going to be packed I would have left home sooner," she said.
"I got here just in time as well," you said with a chuckle.
"I'm Tiffany, by the way."
She reached out her hand and you shook it. You told her your name and smiled.
After the movie had ended you found yourself walking out of the theater with Tiffany, talking about movies as the two of you made your way to your respective vehicles.
“It was good talking to you,” she said, slipping a small piece of paper in your hand.
You looked down at the tiny note, which had her phone number scribbled on it.
“Give me a call sometime,” she said with a wink.
You watched the blonde saunter away to her car before hastily adding her number to the contacts in your phone.
Jack Torrance:
"Is this seat taken?"
You turned to see a tall man who looked rather scruffy. His eyes were dark and there was some red puffiness around his eyelids.
"Nope," you said, offering him the seat.
The bar was rather empty. Only a few stragglers were inside, including you. You needed a late-night drink. Something to clear your mind. Or fog it up. You just needed to forget.
The man beside you ordered a Scotch and didn't hesitate to drink it down quickly.
"What brings you here?" he asked.
He then ordered another drink. This time he asked the bartender to just leave the bottle. Either he was going through a tough time or he was just an alcoholic.
"I had a bad day. Needed a drink," you said, "What about you?"
The man was silent for a bit as if he was struggling to answer.
"Divorce," he stated simply.
His voice was quieter than before. It seemed as if the divorce was rather fresh. His face dropped a bit and he looked as if he wanted to throw his glass across the bar.
Hesitantly, you patted him on the shoulder. It was a kind gesture. You didn't need to know the details. You could tell that this man was hurting. His outward expression was one of anger, but somewhere deep down you could tell that he was upset.
"I'm sorry," you said quietly.
"Don't be. It was a long time coming," he said.
A long time coming. You could say the same thing about your current situation.
You had just cut ties with your ex. A part of you was relieved. The other part of you was enraged that you hadn't ended things sooner. But now it was time to move on to new and better things. And why not start by making a new friend? You took a sip of your drink and then turned in your seat towards the man.
"I'm (Y/N), by the way," you said, sticking out your hand.
"I'm Jack," he said, shaking your hand.
Pavi Largo:
You had known Pavi for a little over a year. You had worked with Amber Sweet before, making her dresses and personalized latex corsets, and she had introduced you to him.
After that, Pavi soon fell in love with your talent and hired you as the entire Largo family's official personal stylist. The last one had to take a personal leave after a violent encounter with Pavi's brother, Luigi. You on the other hand found your job to be much safer than anticipated. You knew beforehand that taking a job working for any member of the Largo family would be a risk. But after a few months passed you started to have fun.
"My sister wants you to make this," Pavi said, entering your workshop.
He opened up a magazine and sat it on your desk, revealing a model in a latex mini dress. You walked over from your workstation and went over to the desk, picking up the magazine.
"She's really getting obsessed with latex and vinyl, isn't she?" you mumbled, taking a closer look at the picture.
For the past two months, almost everything Amber had asked you to make was made from shiny black vinyl, PVC, and leather.
"Almost as obsessed as she is with going under the knife," Pavi laughed.
You glanced up at Pavi, taking a good look at the woman's face he wore as a mask. You squinted your eyes as you noticed the skin was starting to look rather splotchy.
"Pavi, you need a new mask," you said.
"No, I don't," he said, sitting down in a chair in front of your desk.
"I think you do," you insisted.
He simply shrugged and put his legs up, resting his feet on your desk. You sighed as you watched him do so.
"You can go now."
"And why would I do that? It's much more fun in here watching you work," Pavi said.
Pavi had a habit of doing this. He'd come in with a minor request and then find an excuse to stay. It didn't bother you all that much but today was a busy day. You were making two outfits for Amber, a suit for Luigi, and a dress for some guest who would be arriving at Gene-Co for an event.
You didn't have the time to entertain him.
"I have to work, Pavi," you said sternly.
"Take a break. Talk to me," he said, pouting his faux face.
"I don't have time."
"Alright...alright. But may I make another request?"
You rolled your eyes. There was already so much work to be done in such little time.
"Yes," you said.
He stood up and walked over to you. His hand reached up and caressed your face, grazing over your skin.
"Come with me tonight and help me find a new face," he said.
It wasn't much of a request. It was much more of a statement. A demand.
You nodded your head in agreement.
"Consider it a date," he said with a smile.
Art the Clown:
It was the middle of the night on Halloween. You stumbled on your feet as you made your way down the sidewalk. The air was proceeding to get colder as time passed.
You weren't sure what time it was. Your cell phone had died hours ago at the Halloween party you had left.
You couldn't drive home. You were far too intoxicated to do that. Plus, you didn't have a car of your own. Your friend had picked you up before the party. When you went to leave the party there was no sign of her or the car. Figuring that your friend had ditched you for a late-night hookup, you decided to tread back to your house.
Your outfit wasn't providing much warmth either. The clown costume you had picked for the Halloween costume was cute but it was made out of thin fabric. Cursing to yourself, you looked around.
Across the street from you was a pizza restaurant. The open sign still glowed and the lights were on inside.
"I could go for some food," you thought to yourself.
You walked across the street and entered the restaurant. A feeling of warmth cascaded over you as you stepped in.­­­
"Welcome! Great costume! What can I get you?" a man greeted you from behind the counter.
He was heavier set with tan skin and dark hair that was slicked back with styling gel.
You looked over the multiple options of pizza behind the glass of the counter. You ordered a slice of your favorite pizza and sat down at a booth.
As you ate, you heard the bell on the door chime. Glancing up, you noticed a tall figure dressed in a white and black clown suit with an alternating pattern. His face was painted white, and his face was covered in what you assumed to be prosthetics. In his hand, he carried a black bag.
For just a second, you forgot it was Halloween, and a chill ran up your spine. The feeling disappeared quickly as you assumed he was in a similar situation as you. Either going to or coming from a Halloween party.
The stranger sat down at the booth closest to the door without ordering anything.
"May I help you?" the man at the counter asked the clown.
There was no answer; the clown just looked away.
You decided to ignore it and continued to eat your pizza. It was Halloween after all. All types of people were bound to be lurking around.
As you ate, you couldn't help but feel a strange sensation. Goosebumps were forming on your neck. You glanced over to the clown. He was staring at you. Almp began to form in your throat and a part of you couldn't help but stare back. You couldn't tell if you were scared or just annoyed that someone was staring at you while you ate.
You decide to wave at him. A small gesture to break the ice. He smiled back at you.
You turned back to your food and finished your pizza rather quickly. The clown's smile wasn't necessarily a comforting one. You went to get up from your booth and couldn't. A small gasp left your mouth as you looked up. The clown stood in front of you, peering down as he blocked you from exiting. You hadn't even noticed him get up or walk over.
He put up his finger, gesturing for you to hold on. With a few dramatized miming motions, he reached into his bag and slowly pulled out a flower. He held up a singular rose, and you hesitantly took it.
"Um…thank you," you said quietly, smiling a little.
He tipped his hat and walked away, leaving the shop. It wouldn't be the last time you saw the mysterious clown.
Luigi Largo:
The repossession of organs was a regular occurrence in the city. By the year 2052, everyone's body seemed to begin to fail. Organ transplants and regular cosmetic surgery became the norm. Hell, even you had had a few organ transplants yourself to save yourself from an early death.
And with the new way of life, a new set of rules had to be made. Organs were now a rental property. If you didn't pay, they could be repossessed. You understood the rule, and you never missed a payment. Even when you didn't have the money, you still found a way to have the cash by the time payment was due.
You were good at keeping your payments, but you couldn't say the same about other people. When Gene-Co came knocking on your door months ago, you didn't know what to expect. It's not every day that Rotti Largo comes down to talk to civilians. You had seen him and his children on TV. His daughter was around your age. They lived a glamorous life, but it didn't take a rocket scientist to know that they were a mess.
Rotti offered you a job that day. He wanted to hire you as an assassin. There were fuzzy details about the current Repo-Man betraying his trust. He mentioned that it was good money and an easy way for you to pay off your organ payments. He even said that the company would give you grace periods to pay. Blah. Blah. Blah. Long story short, he wanted you to be his new "Repo-man".
At the time you weren't fond of the idea. Not many people lived through repossession. It essentially would kill a person each time. Also, really? The company that was paying you would just be getting the money back from you anyway. It didn't make much sense.
But that was months ago.
The past version of you would be absolutely disgusted with the present version of you.
Oh well.
Currently, you had your hand shoved into a man's chest. Normally you would have brought someone like this back to your home. It was much easier to cut the entire chest open to retrieve a heart. But you didn't have time for that right now. You were on the clock.
You had tracked this guy down as quickly as possible once you had realized you were late for drop-off. You had quickly stunned him, causing him to pass out.
And now he would never wake up because you were elbow-deep in his chest. You carefully pulled out the man's heart. You didn't care too much about properly cutting arteries. If Gene-Co didn't care about the condition of the heart then why should you? They just wanted to be able to cross a name off their list.
You placed the heart in a bag and then in your small ice cooler. Looking down at the guy you couldn't help but feel sorry. If only he had kept up with his payments. You started making your way down the streets.
You had on a respirator and tinted goggles. Not only did it help with keeping your identity sealed but it also helped protect you from the ungodly amount of pollution. The air was so thick with smog that it always looked like as if there was a haze of smoke in the air. You hadn't seen the stars in years. Just the cloudy light from the moon.
You remember your mom telling you what it was like when she was your age. She had been born in the early 2000s. She turned 18 around 2020. Your mom had grown up in a rural area, full of green fields and forests full of trees. You could tell that it made her sad.
None of that existed anymore.
Her home had been replaced with parking lots and skyscrapers. By the time she had you, she was 30, and there wasn't much grass left in America. Not many trees either. Most plants were grown in greenhouses now. They wouldn't survive the outside conditions. Now you were in your twenties, and you wished your mom had gotten pregnant sooner. You wished you hadn't had to grow up in a time where Earth had been wiped of nature and replaced with chaos.
As you walked down the sidewalk, you could see the glowing Gene-Co sign from down the street, looming over the city. It felt as if a giant eye was watching over you.
Although you worked for them, you didn't know much about the Largo family. You just knew what you saw on TV and the news. And based on what you heard, the family was nothing short of dysfunctional. You had never met any of them other than the patriarch, Rotti Largo. Your business was usually with Genterns and receptionists, not the Largo family.
You entered Gene-Co, pushing past the big glass doors. The building was an odd combination of a hospital and a business. On some floors, there would be operating rooms and Genterns. On other floors, offices and meeting rooms. You reached the front desk and looked at the blonde Gentern behind it.
God, you hated their uniforms.
The red visors and scrubs that looked like a mini dress bothered you for some reason. Maybe it was the fact that you always got a face full of their rear ends that irked you.
"Delivery," you said behind your mask.
She picked up her desk phone and pressed a couple of buttons.
"The repossession delivery is here," she said to the person on the other end of the line. She nodded her head and hung up the phone.
"You know where to go. They'll buzz you in," she said.
You walked away from the desk and made your way down the hall, entering a back room. It looked like a loading dock but was used for organ storage. And by the looks of it, very poor organ storage. The room wasn't even cold. No wonder people's organs were still useless after surgery.
As you walked past the shelves of unkept organs, you heard a group of voices arguing.
"What the hell?" you thought to yourself.
You knew it couldn't be Genterns arguing. These were two masculine voices.
You turned the corner of shelves and saw two men in suits arguing as Genterns looked on.
"You think you could run this company? Are you mad?"
"The only mad person here is you! God, look at you! You think that fake face looks good on you?"
You then realized who the men were. You recognized them from the news. The Largo brothers.
One had medium-length black hair and wore what appeared to be the face of a woman. The other man's shirt was unbuttoned, revealing a chest full of scars. In his hand was a knife. It took you a second to remember their names.
Pavi and Luigi.
"Ahem," you coughed.
Everyone turned to look at you as if you weren't supposed to be there.
"Ah, is this our new Repo-man," Pavi said.
"I've been working for this company for months. I'm not new. Here," you said, handing the heart-filled cooler to the closest Gentern.
"You're new to us," Luigi said, stepping closer as he buttoned up his shirt.
He circled around before stopping right in front of you.
"What's this for?" he said, tapping his knife on your respirator.
"To filter out pollution," you said. Honestly, what type of question was that?
"And these?" he asked, poking at your goggles. His fingerprint smudged the lenses, causing you to have to take them off and clean them.
"I wear them so I don't have to make eye contact with people. Thanks a lot for messing them up," you said, frustrated.
"You're welcome," Luigi said.
He walked away from you, going to stand back by his brother.
"Well, goodbye. I'm sure you have more repossessions to do," Pavi said, smiling.
You stuck out your hand, waiting for the Gentern to pay you.
"What do you want now?" Luigi asked.
"This is the part where a Gentern normally pays me," you said, annoyed.
"Oh, I got you covered this time," Luigi said, walking back over to you. He took out a wad of cash, and you could tell it was way more than your usual pay. You expected him to go through it, but he just sat all of the money in your hand.
"Wait, this is too muc-"
"Keep the change," Luigi said, winking at you.
Billy Lenz:
You slumped onto the couch as you listened to music. It was Christmas break, and the rest of the people in your (fraternity/sorority) had gone home to their families. Only you and a couple of the other members had decided to stay for the holidays. You were left alone in the house while the other members left to go to the bar.
The music played at a low volume and echoed throughout the house. You closed your eyes as you listened to it, droning off as you finally began to relax. The past few weeks had been stressful due to finals, but now all the tests were finally over. It was also the first time you had been alone in months. You could feel the weight of the tension leaving your body. It was a great feeling that you hadn't felt in a while. It wasn't often that you could just sit down and relax.
Just as you began to get comfortable, the house phone rang.
"Damn it," you mumbled to yourself.
You got up and walked into the foyer of the house, picking up the phone with a sigh.
"Hello?" you said. Instead of an answer, you were met with fuzzy garbling.
Strange noises came through the phone. Screams and whispers flooded through the phone.
"Hello?" you said, again, getting more frustrated.
"Billy...." a voice said, drawing out the syllables.
"There's no Billy here. You've got the wrong number?"
"What are you doing, Billy?" the voice whispered with a growl.
"You got the wrong number, man. Goodbye," you said, hanging up the phone.
"What the hell was that?" you thought.
You gritted your teeth as you went to the kitchen. Grabbing a glass, you began to pour yourself something to drink. As you did so, you heard a creak upstairs. Your head shot up. You were on edge due to the strange phone call, but you decided to brush off the feeling. The (fraternity/sorority) was old and would sometimes creak in the middle of the night. You were sure that was all it was. Your nerves, plus the old house, were just not getting along.
You went back to the living room and turned up the music in an attempt to get back to your relaxed state. Right before you sat down, the phone rang again. You paused for a second, contemplating whether you should answer it.
You took a deep breath and made your way back into the foyer, picking up the phone slowly and bringing it up to your ear.
"Hello?" you said.
This time you could tell your voice was more frustrated. And your frustration got worse as you heard the caller on the other end. Once again, you were met with more grumbles, screams, moans, and whispers.
"Hey, man. I don't know who you are, but stop calling this number!" you said. You slammed the phone back down on the receiver.
Almost on cue, you heard a creak come from upstairs again. This time, you could hear it more clearly. It sounded like the floorboard creaking under the weight of someone's foot.
A shiver ran up your spine as you were suddenly struck with a dreadful feeling of fear.
"Who's there?" you called out. Maybe it was just one of the members of the (fraternity/sorority). Maybe they had come home from the bar while you were in the kitchen.
"Guys, are you home?" you asked. You hadn't moved from the foyer, too scared to even budge. Your eyes were glued to the stairs of the house.
Suddenly the phone rang again, causing you to jump at the sudden noise. You turned away from the stairs and brought your attention back to the phone.
"Look, man. You're really starting to piss me off," you said.
"What are you talking about, (Y/N)?" a familiar voice said on the other side of the line.
It was your mom.
"Jeez, I'm sorry mom. Hi, how are you?" you greeted, taking a sigh of relief.
"I'm fine. I could ask the same about you. Why'd you answer the phone like that?" she asked.
"The house has been getting some weird phone calls, and I'm the only one at home right now. I'm just a little scared is all," you explained.
"Have you called the police to see if they can track the number?"
"No, I don't think it's that serious," you answered.
"Well, please be safe. I was just calling to check up on you and tell you we miss you," she said.
"I miss you too. I'll see you guys once spring break rolls around," you said.
"Okay. And (Y/N)...." Your mom trailed off a bit.
"Yeah?"
"Please be safe," she said.
"I will. Bye, Mom. I love you."
You hung up the phone putting it back on the receiver. You turned back to the stares and let out a gasp. Your body was tackled to the ground and suddenly you were struggling to breathe. You looked up and saw a man with brown hair and a dark green sweater.
His hands were around your throat and your breath was becoming more and more restricted. You clawed at his hands and kicked your legs.
After missing a couple of times, your knee hit the man in the groin, causing him to loosen his grip. You then raised your legs, kicking him back with both of your feet. The man fell back, giving you enough time to get back on your feet. You quickly grabbed the heaviest thing around you which just so happened to be a weighted candlestick sitting on the foyer table.
The man stumbled back to his feet. You gripped the candlestick, just waiting for an excuse to use it.
"Who are you?" you asked.
He smirked, and his eyes glanced over at the house phone on the foyer table.
The realization hit you like a bolt of lightning. The mysterious caller was in the house standing right in front of you.
"Man, you got a lot of explaining to do."
Will Graham:
You tapped your fingers on the desk while you waited for Jack Crawford. The door to his office had been open, so you were sure he would return soon. On his desk sat a stack of folders and papers.
If you weren't in a professional setting, you might have not resisted the urge to snoop. But alas, this was your work setting, and you had a great level of respect for Jack. Your eyes pried away from the papers and looked elsewhere around the empty office.
Over the past month, you had been hospital-bound after a nearly fatal encounter with an active shooter. You were just a criminal investigator. And all though you had a firearm on you constantly, most of the time you didn't need it. Crime suspects rarely came back to the scene of the crime. But this one did, and he had pulled out his own gun before you had time to react.
You were shot four times and, you were lucky to be alive. After a grueling recovery phase, you thought it was about time you got back to work.
"I expected you to be home, (Y/N)," a voice said from behind you.
You turned around in your seat. Jack stood at the doorway of his office. There was a small smile on his face. You could tell he was happy to see you.
"I got tired resting in bed. I need some excitement, I guess," you said.
He walked into the office and sat down at his desk.
"Are you sure you're up for it? Your leave technically hasn't ended yet. You still have time to recover," he said.
You shook your head.
"I'm done with recovery. I might need some therapy, but other than that, I'm good," you said with a laugh.
"I can recommend you a good therapist," he said. He was partially joking, but he seemed sincere.
"I might have to take you up on that offer," you said, "So what have I missed? Got anything for me, boss?"
Jack's hand made its way to one of the folders on his desk. He slid it across to you.
The front tab was labeled 'Minnesota Shrike/Chesapeake Ripper'. You opened the folder up and started reading.
"We've been called out to Minnesota to investigate a series of murders. All of the victims so far are all teenage girls. As you can see most of them look rather similar," Jack began to explain.
You flipped through the contents of the folder, reading about each victim and examining their photos, mainly the ones that were taken post-mortem.
You wiggled out a picture from underneath a paperclip that had been taken at one of the crime scenes. A girl was sprawled out in the sun in what appeared to be a grassy field. She was nude. Her skin was very pale and had begun to turn greyish-blue. Right underneath her breasts were two apparent puncture wounds. And what was coming out of those wounds made you squint to make sure you weren't seeing things.
She had been impaled with deer antlers.
"What does this have to do with the Chesapeake Ripper?" you asked.
"There may be a possible connection. We have to search every lead," Jack said.
You nodded and continued to look through the folder.
"And what do you want me to do?" you asked.
"One, get ready to go to Minnesota. We just got the call about an hour ago that there's been another murder," Jack said.
"Really? Man, whoever this guy is he's resilient," you said.
"And two, do me a favor and take these down to Will Graham at the Academy."
Jack took the stack of papers and folders and sat them all down in front of you. You closed the folder you were looking at and put it on top.
"Who's Will Graham?" you questioned.
"Your new investigation partner," Jack said.
"Well, I guess I should meet him sooner than later," you said.
"I agree. I'll see you later, (L/N)," Jack said.
You got up from your seat and took the paperwork into your hands. You exited the office and made your way out of the FBI Crime Lab.
Instead of taking your car, you decided to walk to the academy. It was only a couple of minutes away, so the walk would be rather short.
The leaves on the trees had almost all turned dark shades of orange and yellow. Leaves fell on the sidewalk as you walked down the sidewalk. The changing color made you realize just exactly how much time had passed since the shooting. You remembered how the air had felt that day. It wasn't necessarily hot but it was warm. Warm enough to wear all you wanted to wear was a t-shirt and jeans. But now the air was crisp and cool. In a couple of weeks, the temperature would be in the freezing temperatures. Time had changed so quickly.
You approached the front doors of the FBI Academy and entered. You weren't sure where to go. You figured Will was a teacher but Jack hadn't mentioned what he would be teaching. Now that you thought of it, you had no idea what the man would even look like.
You walked down the hallways, peeking into the open doors. You weren't really sure where to even look. You heard faint talking and footsteps down another hall and decided to follow the sounds.
As you turned the corner you saw what you knew to be students based on their uniforms.
"Excuse me, guys. Do you know where I can find Will Graham?" you asked as you approached them.
"Oh, yeah. We just got out of his class. Down this hall, third door on the right," one of the girls said, pointing down the hall.
"Thank you so much," you said.
You walked down the quiet hallway and turned at the open lecture hall. It was a smaller class with a large projector. You saw who you assumed was Will Graham facing towards the projector, looking up and examining it.
You looked up and paused. It was the same picture from earlier. The girl was impaled by deer antlers.
"In all of my years as an agent, I've never seen anything quite like that," you said aloud.
The man jumped a bit at the sudden sound of your voice and turned around. He had wavy brown hair that cascaded around his head. His face dawned a good bit of short whiskers and he wore dark glasses that rested on his nose.
"Neither have I," he said, "May I help you?"
"Will Graham?" you questioned.
"Yes, and you are?"
"(Y/N) (L/N), Jack Crawford sent me," you said. You walked over to him and offered him a handshake, which he took without hesitation.
"Jack sent you. So you're not a student?" he asked.
"No, I'm an agent. I've been out on medical leave, but I just got back," you explained.
You handed him the pack of paperwork. He took it in his hands and sat it down.
"Welcome back," he said.
"Thank you."
"So what are your thoughts on...all of this?" Will questioned, gesturing up to the projector.
"I'm not sure yet. I guess I'll come up with a better opinion in a couple of hours. I'm coming with you and Jack to Minnesota," you said.
"Oh, you're going with us?" Will said.
"Mhm, it's time for me to get back out there in the field. I'm glad I won't have to do it alone. According to Jack, it sounds like we're partners now," you said.
"I guess so," he said with a small smile.
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icanseethefuture333 · 11 months ago
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PAC: What your pretty self needs to hear for Valentine's Day ♡
Your heart's message to you + a message from your secret admirer 💌
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They say the truth ain't pretty, but coming from that pretty mouth
The truth is fitting, cause you ain't ever talkin' loud
And you know plenty
Yeah, you know what I'm talkin' about
Cause you just get me
Yeah, you so pretty... ♡
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Pile 1:
Your heart's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Girl by Destiny's Child
Far by SZA
I MISS YOU SO BAD by iKON
The Lovers, Seven of Cups, & Three of Cups
So what your heart wishes to tell to you is that there is still love out there. You may have previously gotten over an ex, a past crush, or you are in the process of recovering from a break up. In the song "Far" SZA asks Sadhguru how to deal with rejection, in which he responds, "That's great! If nobody wants you then you're free." You have to look on the bright side of things. You also have to know what your worth is. No one else can define your worth but you. You have to be secure with who you are as a person. No one can love the parts you need to heal from. Once you feel fulfilled with who you are as a person. That is when you can form healthy connection with others. I believe you still are hoping for you and this person to get back together but you are hurting yourself even more by obsessing over this person (was going to say focus but instead I heard obsess). Reflect on your current situation and ask yourself, "What wound is this person triggering in me?". What do you need to move on from? To take care of your heart you should do some self reflection. Journaling and shadow work would help provide some clarity. Your heart asks you to not fall back into old habits. Self love is important for your growth, pile 1!
Your secret admirer's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Time To Love by Red Velvet
Changes by Jeff Bernat
I Think I'm Falling by KOHH
Wallflower, New Love, & Union
There is a new love coming in for you! This person could be shy and likes to admire you from afar. They could be self conscious about some things about themselves as well. The feelings seem to be mutual here. There could be a new crush that you like and wish to speak to, but are to nervous to ask them out of fear of rejection. Don't fret! Confessing your feelings helps build courage. If the person rejects you, then that just means there isnsomeone else better out there for you. It is not the end of the world just because you got rejected. Have a little more confidence in yourself, you are great, pile 1! Regardless, I see you and this secret admirer actually being intimate. Things could develop into something more serious with this union card. So make sure to be open to this energy and give them a chance at love ♡
Pile 2:
Your heart's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Mine by Slayyyter
ANTIFRAGILE by LE SSERAFIM
Post To Be by Omarion ft. Chris Brown & Jhené Aiko
Four of Cups, Eight of Wands, & The Fool
Your heart does not want to be tied down at the moment! I believe it has plenty of love to give lol. You also have no problem with turning people down or vice versa. You are looking for a fling and just wish to have a casual relationship! You could have a lot of options in love and would like to explore things romantically, maybe even sexually. Your heart suggests that you focus on your happiness and learn what pleases you. Love does not always have to be serious. Sometimes short lived romances have the best stories to tell! You will be feeling very confident and sexy in your romantic endeavors.
Your secret admirer's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Boys Wanna Be Her by Peaches
No Flex Zone by Rae Sremmurd
STUCK IN MY HEAD by Twice
Open Relationship, Mature Woman, & Fun Times
This secret admirer of yours is honestly hilarious 😭. I kept getting meme songs and I hs to shuffle again to get a proper message. This could be my queer pile as well 🏳️‍🌈. I'm getting Renee Rapp vibes from your secret admirer, Pile 2 😋. They could suit the 'girl crush' aesthetic or if it is someone who identifies as masculine, they have a very pretty face. They are open minded, flirtatious, and exciting to be around. This person wishes to tell you that you are stuck in their head! They find you to be "so fine" 😜! They would like take you out soon. I'm getting it will be a bar date or they will take you dancing at a night club.
Pile 3:
Your heart's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
More Than Enough by Alina Baraz
Bluffin by Brent Faiyaz
Mona Lisa by Naji ft. Monter Booker
Death, Six of Swords, & Six of Pentacles
Oh, pile 3, bless your heart 🥹. You are someone who has such a kind, gentle heart. You have the purest intentions and for that people can tell how geniune you are as a person. You could be selfless and caring towards others. You have so much love to give that it is obvious to others. I don't see any bitterness in your heart and I feel like your heart wishes to tell you how proud it is of you for being able to find forgiveness. You are leaning to let go of the people who have hurt you in the past. The essence of your spirit is so soft and it's very beautiful to witness. Your heart's message to you is that anyone would be lucky to have you in their life. So don't ever feel like you are not enough because you're more than that. You are this cup that is overflowing with love and sincerity.
Your secret admirer's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
At Your Best (You Are Loved) by Aaliyah
Freaky Deaky by Tyga ft. Doja Cat
LOVE by Kendrick Lamar ft. Zacari
Dating, True Love, & True Gem
Your secret admirer absolutely adores you, pile 3. They see your value as a person and they know that there is no one else like you in this world. You have so much love to give and they do as well. I am getting that they want to literally treat you like a princess/princess - just overall royalty. Their have geniune intentions as well and they would like to spoil you this Valentine's day ❤. (Channeled song: Kiss It Better by Rihanna 💋) for a few of you, you and your specific person could be separated. I see that things will turn out for the better soon. So have faith in yourself and in this person for things to work out. They could offer you some sort of proposal, love offer, or a token of their gratitude to show how much they love you. I see things would be passionate, flirty, and romantic for you and your secret admirer 🎆.
Pile 4:
Your heart's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Green Light by Beyoncé
Standing Next To You by Jungkook
God of Music by SEVENTEEN
Two of Pentacles, Page of Wands, & The Magician
You are such an optimistic person, pile 4! You could be someone who often gives advice to others and help others look on the bright side of things. You radiate such positive energy and it makes you a joy to be around. You could be someone who knows what they want and goes after it. You know how to balance your heart with your brain. Intuitive but also logical. People wonder how you are able to turn your ideas into reality. Your heart's message to you is to keep going after your goals and not let anyone distract you from your dreams. As long as you are happy that is all that matters. Your heart also wishes to tell you that whatever makes you light up inside is meant for you. Whatever your heart is set on whether that's a new job, house, etc. You have the ability to manifest whatever you desire.
Your secret admirer's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Phone Me by Che Ecru
Novacane by Frank Ocean
Own It by Drake
Passion, Friendship, & Communication
For some of you, you could be currently in a "situationship" or have a FWB with someone. While for others, your secret admirer is possibly a friend of yours. This person is conflicted on how to approach you. You may receive a text or phone call from them soon where they ask you about your relationship with another. They could ask you how you feel about them or drop hints that they are attracted to you. The ball is in your park, pile 4, if you decide to be more than just friends with this person.
Pile 5:
Your heart's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Girl Like Me by Alexa Demie
Fulfillment? By Kilo Kish
Baddie by IVE
Eight of Cups, Two of Cups, & Seven of Swords
I am getting like "manic pixie dream girl" vibes from you, Pile 5. Something about you is hard to pin point to others. Mysterious but also so enchanting. You know you are someone who is complex but also so beautiful. You have these interesting quirks that makes you stand out and memorable to others. You are comfortable with who you are as a person and it could have took you a long time to get to a place of being this self assured. You could have a child like wonder as well and it is admirable to others. You could be questioning what direction to take in life and could find "adulting" very hard but don't give up, pile 5! Everything will be okay in the end. Your heart's message to you is to learn what gives you emotional fulfillment in life. Also to not take shit from no one. What's interesting is your face could look quite sweet but you are actually feisty and have a firey spirit. There is a duality to your personality and its attractive. I am getting like Song Jia, Alexa Demie, Wonyoung, & Taylor Russell vibes from you, pile 5. Your heart wants you to embrace your confidence and focus on the abundance in your future. Do not let people drag you down and dim your light. Your heart believes it is time for some self pampering. Set your standards high in love and know that you are deserving of everything you desire. I also believe it is time to burn bridges with people who no longer serve you. How can you live the life of your dreams if other people only acknowledge the version of yourself that no longer resonates with you? If you wish to be the girl of your dreams, you have to learn to put yourself first.
Your secret admirer's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Lilith by Halsey
Ditto by NewJeans
High Fashion by Roddy Rich ft. Mustard
Triangle, Travel, & Spiritual Growth
What is this Single's Inferno?! You have options, pile 5. You could have more than one secret admirer. You could be observing your current options in love and feeling "Well! Let the best person win☺️!" I see people wanting to fly you out and pay for your trips, oh my🫠. One of the people you will date could be popular or have a well known social status. You give people butterflies and some of you may know what affect you have on people, while some of you are innocent to the fact. You could receive love confessions or you may even already have. I feel like you are the type of person who receives love letters, jewelry, candies, and box of chocolates, if not you are going to be spoiled for this Valentine's day! You could meet your secret admirer(s) while traveling or when going on vacation. Your secret admirer's message to you is that they "like you" and hoping you feel the same 💕. They want to understand your love language and words of affirmations / gift giving could be one of their love languages in particular.
Pile 6:
Your heart's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Rose by Miyeon
Honey Dew by Lion Babe
Chanel by TiaCorine
King of Pentacles, Five of Wands, & Queen of Cups
I feel like you are at odds with your heart and brain right now, pile 6. You seem to feel confused about a decision you have to make. I believe you could think things are "sweeter" in other people's lives but that is not necessarily true. I know sometimes we can want what other people have but if it gets to the point of comparing yourselves to others then its not healthy. You have to remember to be grateful for what you have in life. It's okay to want the finer things, but what are you overlooking when you are doing that? Your heart's message to you is to not worry about what other people are doing in life and instead focus on what makes you great of a person. You are just as lovable, sweet, and beautiful.
Your secret admirer's message to you:
Shufflemancy -
Congratulations by Mac Miller ft. Bilal
Little Things by Sunni Colón
Aura by Mariah The Scientist
Work, Money, & Long Distance
I believe you and this person are already in a relationship. If not, your secret admirer will be the next person you end up in a romantic relationship with. This person could live further away from you and has a high paying job. They prefer to take on a traditional role of a provider. This person could have a hard time discussing their feelings though and shows their love through acts of services. While you, I feel you are more of an emotional person. You both could have a hard time expressing your feelings and thoughts properly to each other, which would cause conflict. Things might be tense for Valentine's Day. You and your secret admirer could have strong feelings for each other, but there needs to be an important conversation had in order for this relationship to progress. Both of you could be disheartened by this but there's hope! Try to appreciate the little things in your relationship and not focus on being the "perfect couple", for that does not exist. Every relationship has its flaws and all that matters is that you and you partner love each other very much. If it's meant to be, it will be, it won't be something you have to force, it'll come naturally.
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jennifer-jeong · 10 months ago
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Smut | Xavier x AFAB!Reader Innocent Valentine
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SUMMARY Xavier is no so innocent this Valentine's day
CONTENT NSFW, 18+, smut, afab (assigned female at birth) reader, feminine reader (he calls you a "good girl"), oral, penetration, creampie, orgasm, spanking, CHARACTERS ARE 18+
AUTHOUR NOTES I'm very late to the Valentine's day idea but whatever LOL Yes I mildly plagiarized the last lines of dialogue from my own post please don't roast me.
WORD COUNT: 794
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Xavier being the innocent gentleman that he is brings a condom on valentines day for you two to use after the banquet. He’s such a sweetheart and doesn’t want to put any pressure on you so he asks you so many times if it’s okay for him to kiss you. Little does he know what’s in store for him.
You immediately have your hands all over him and he thinks it’s because of the alcohol, but you know it’s because you fucking want him right now.
You skip the formalities and quickly have his cock down your throat. “Mmph! F-fuck!,” you hear him moan above you as he sits on the couch while you’re on your knees. Your throat making sinful noises as you stuff yourself full of him, your cheeks flushed, and your core aching with need.
Xavier didn’t want to be too rough with you, your relationship was just getting started and you haven’t been intimate too many times yet. But, with the way that you were acting, he gave an experimental buck of his hips into your mouth and you immediately grabbed his hands to tangle in your hair. He paused, a little confused, as you stopped bobbing your head on him, but quickly figured it out. He pulled at your hair to give you some delicious pressure on your scalp. With barely any delay, he starts fucking your mouth, relishing in the warmth, enjoying your moans, and the ungodly wet sounds your throat is making.
Xavier takes control from here since you’re too drunk and fucked out already, he moves you to the bed but lays you on your stomach on the edge so you’re still half standing. He moves to start to finger you to get you ready for his size but pauses as he remembers the condom in the pocket of his pants he took off. You quickly speak up before he can go find it.
“I can’t fucking wait anymore, please just fill me up baby,” you say, looking back at him with intoxicated eyes as you spread yourself open with your hands. Your slick glistening and creating sticky strings on your thighs.
“Fuck…” He doesn’t hesitate to bottom out and you nearly scream. He pulls all the way out and starts a relentless pace as he slams back into you.
“Yeah? Mm- This is what you wanted right?” He says as he grips the plush of your ass while pounding into you at a ridiculous speed. Xavier was much more feral for you than he let on and you didn’t mind it one fucking bit.
“Y-yes! Please- mmphhh fuck!~ feels s‘good baby…” You moan in response between sobs. His raw cock drags so deliciously against your walls that you continue to drip arousal all over your pretty boyfriend.
“Such a fucking good girl for me,” he says in a deep voice you don’t usually hear and it makes you clench on him. His hips stutter for a second as he moans. He plants a firm slap on your ass and you let out a high pitched sob, enjoying the stinging pain left behind.
The sound of skin slapping and your mixed moans fill the room as he builds both your orgasms. As he feels his near, he flips you onto your back wanting to see your face, wasting no time in folding you in half to fuck deep into you.
“Y’fill me up so good- nghh… thank you baby,” you say as he kisses your cervix with his tip. He swears he can see hearts in your eyes as he kisses your legs in response.
He wraps an arm around your leg to reach his thumb to your clit, you gasp at the extra stimulation and claw at the sheets, feeling yourself quickly reaching your high.
“Ah- ah! Nghh- I’m fucking cumming baby please keep fucking m’like that.”
“Mm? Yeah? Cum f’me, pretty girl, wanna feel you cum on me.”
And with that, your waves of pleasure wash over you as your body shakes. Your moans are uncontrollable due to how good it feels from him still pounding you at the same pace while his thumb toys with your bundle of nerves.
You’ve made a ring of cream at the base of his cock at this point and he tumbles over the edge with you as your pussy twitches as you cum. His thrusts irregular as you say “cum in me please- wan’ it so bad…”
A few more thrusts and he stops, fully buried inside you, both of your arousals flooding out of you.
“Fuck… Since when did you want to become a mom?” He jokes between catching his breath.
“Your fault you fuck me like you want to be a dad,” you joke back.
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|| MASTERLIST ♡ || Thank you for reading! ||
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trashywritestrash · 11 months ago
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Short and Sweet
Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x Reader
Word Count: 853
Warnings: Best friend’s brother— is that a warning? This is just a short lil thing for Valentine’s Day
A/N: The poem and response in this came from Thomas Richardson’s “Gentleman’s Valentine Writer” which wasn’t actually published until 1828 but I needed ideas, okay? Also, I wrote this when Bridgerton was still the lead in the poll lol
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Living beside the Bridgerton household had many advantages. Being close in age to Daphne gave you the perfect excuse to spend time with her. However, spending time with Daphne meant also spending time with the rest of her family, which allowed you to form a close bond with them all. One Bridgerton in particular being Benedict.
Benedict was a few years older than you, but within a perfectly reasonable range that made it acceptable for you to fancy him. How could you not? He was sweet and sensitive, but he had a playful side that brought joy any time you were fortunate enough to witness it. Although, you never dared to dream that Benedict might return your affections. You were the best friend of his younger sister, surely he would not think of you in that way.
Initially, you had been excited to be presented before the queen and sent out into society. But while Daphne had been deemed the season's incomparable, you had fallen into her shadow. You were happy to see your friend receive many visitors and gifts, but some days it would hurt to see a line of men outside her door while you waited in an empty sitting room.
Waking on Valentine's Day brought nothing but sorrow. It was only one month into the social season and you already felt that you were destined to become an old spinster. With no prospective husbands in sight, you would likely have to face a second season. You did not expect that you would receive any callers that day, yet you waited in your sitting room in a fine dress, as you did every other day. Your mother sat in a chair at the far end of the room, leisurely reading until something would happen.
Early into the day, your butler entered the room with a calling card in hand, "A Mister Bridgerton is here to call upon Miss Y/L/N."
"Send him in," You replied, feeling your chest constrict. It was possible that one of Daphne's brothers had come to pass along a message for her, but a gentleman visiting while you were accepting callers still brought you a shred of hope.
Moments later, you saw Benedict step through the doorway, holding something behind his back. He smiled, "I see I have gotten here before the rest."
You returned his smile, nervous, yet calmed by his presence. "I think you will find that the gentlemen are coming to your door today, not mine."
"Then they are fools and I am lucky to have you all to myself."
"What can I do for you, Benedict? I find it hard to believe you would be here as a suitor." You spoke the words in jest, but felt your throat tighten as you said them all the same.
Benedict's smile fell into confusion, "What is so hard to believe about that?"
Taken aback by the genuine confusion in his tone, you clarified, "I only mean to say that I would not have expected it."
"If that is the case, I hope that you find this to be a good surprise," For just a moment, you heard a bit of nerves in his voice as he tried to present a confident image. "Unfortunately, I cannot stay long. But I wanted to bring you these and to officially declare my affection."
Finally, Benedict moved the hand behind his back to reveal a beautiful bouquet of morning glory and myrtle. You smiled wide at the sight, "Thank you, Benedict. They're lovely."
Shortly after, Benedict had to take his leave, although he promised to come back the following day. Once he had left, you reached for a book on the language of flowers. You found that morning glories are used to represent affection, meanwhile myrtle is used to represent love and marriage. Learning that brought a blush to your cheeks, finding the meaning to be a little bold, but not unpleasant.
It was then that you noticed a small folded piece of parchment beside the flowers. When you unfolded the paper, you could see the painted design done in watercolors. A man and a woman stood beneath a tree, which was situated between a lovely cottage and a church. The image was small, but you could tell that the couple was you and Benedict. On the other side of the parchment was a simple note.
I boast not eloquence, dear Miss, Nor do I write exceedingly fine; Therefore, I bluntly ask you this-- Pray, will you be my Valentine?
As you looked down at the note, you felt your heart swell. You held it close to your chest, feeling as if you could burst from happiness at any moment. Your mother then looked up from her book. "What is that, dear?"
"It is nothing!" You responded quickly. Luckily, your mother did not push the issue further.
That night, you folded the note once more and placed it in the drawer of the nightstand beside your bed. As you attempted to fall asleep, all you could think of was that you could not wait to see Benedict again.
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harmoonix · 1 year ago
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Love asteroids to look for in their chart: (list)
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The Main 5 love asteroids known by most people:
Juno (3) it's mostly about your relationship/marriage overall and the person you want or desire in a relationship
Groom (5129) if you are attracted to men, this asteroid will tell you a lot about your future spouse especially when you make a persona chart of it
Briede (19029) this one is if you are attracted to women, it will tell you about your future wife/her personality/traits everything
Eros (433) this asteroid is erotic, so it's indicating how erotic you are, where and how you are erotic and how you express your eroticism
Aphrodite (1388) most people associate this asteroid with beauty but Lady Aphrodite is the goddess of fertility too, so this asteroid can tell how connected/bounded you are with your spouse and how you are in love
Other love asteroids but less known by people:
Valentine (447) represents pure love, and how sacrificing you are in love, I imagine this as another side of Cupid (the angel) + the way you act when you first have a crush on someone
Cupido (763) this is the angel Cupid himself, it will repsent your true love towards your partner and your most sensitive point in love relationships
Destinn (6583) this is not really a love asteroid but in your Juno/Groom/Briede/Descendant persona chart it can show the destiny of that specific relationship
Again not a love asteroid but Born (13954) in harmonious aspects with Juno or Groom/Briede it can show that you were born to be with that specific person
Bacchus (2063) indicates obsesion with love, having a really high sex appeal, very hot/magnetic etc...
Lust (4386) as the name tells. It can indicate your lust/kinks/things you like to do during sex and a beast in bed
Hera (103) - the greek version of Juno but this asteroid will mostly tell about your marriage and how your marriage will be
Kama (1387) this asteroids shows how you value the sex, how sexual you are and taboo topics related to this
Sappho (80) is another asteroid of love if you are attracted to women this asteroid can indicate that.
Amor (1121) - Amor means love in Spanish, this asteroid can indicate your love language/how you give love, how you want to be treated in a relationship and your spouse's love language aswell
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Here is a photo with all the house meanings in astrology to have some easier time to find what a specific asteroid can mean in your birth chart
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Hope this helped you to cercetate more about your love life/future spouse/future relationship or current relationship and to know about your spouse.
In my opinion if you wanna know more about your spouse and your relationship with them check your Groom/Briede/Juno persona chart
And for vedic chart, check your d9 chart that usually activates when you are around at the end of 20's and start of 30's tho some people think the d9 charts is activated since birth 🫶😍
Here is the d9 chart site !!🙏🏼 Make sure to check your DK planet the planet with the lowest degree in your chart (The D9 one not the D1) here
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The "DK planet"one should've be showed like this!❤️😊 (I did a random chart for this example lol but I just realised they have DK sun just like me💀)
H a r m o o n i x
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deanssluvr · 5 months ago
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MAKE ME FAITHFUL
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pairing: joost klein x fem!reader
summary: joost always makes valentines so special for you every year, but this time he was stressed and busy. so now it’s your turn to make his day just a bit better.
word count: 2.5k
warnings: MDNI. SMUT. RPF. handjob. oral (m! receiving). needy/sub!joost. slightly proofread.
a/n: back to writing smut because it's a minute lol. seen a few people write about this and have been dying to do it myself. hope you guys enjoy it. <3
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Although Valentine’s Day was one of your favorite holidays, it felt less special this time than others. Joost, your boyfriend of four years, has always tried to make the day memorable. From his attempts at home-cooked dinners to taking you to local spots he knows you’d enjoy, he has always made this day special for you. But now you were in your kitchen, alone, ordering yourself dinner. 
You weren’t mad about him missing today. Your boyfriend’s job has its ups and downs, like being busy on Valentines. He’d been gone since you woke up. It was quite early when you opened your eyes and the sun was peering in through the window, beckoning for you to start your morning. You moved from under your covers and felt the cold air blow over your skin. Shivering slightly, you pick up your phone looking at the notifications.
i’m really sorry liefje (love) I couldn’t be here today. got a lot of stuff to do before the tour. I left something in the living room for you. hope you like it. 
You smiled warmly at the message. You got out of bed, the rug shielding your feet from the cold floor. You walked over to your closet slipped into some slippers and threw on one of Joost’s jackets. Stepping out into the living room, a familiar smell was in the air and it put a smile on your face. Looking on the coffee table you saw a bag of breakfast from your favorite restaurant, an assortment of your favorite flowers neatly sitting in a beautiful vase, and a small, pink stuffed bear leaning against it. You walked over to it, grazing your fingers over the flowers. They were your favorite and he only got them for you on special occasions, like today. Picking one up, you noticed there was a small note attached to it. You opened the small paper. On it read an apology from your boyfriend. Although he couldn’t be here, he still wanted your day to be special.
And now it was roughly nine o’clock at night and still no sign of him. You were starting to think you’d fall asleep before you saw him. After successfully ordering your food, you walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. Your phone vibrated in your hand and you looked at it with some sort of anticipation, hoping that it was him saying that he was on his way or almost home. But the feeling left quickly as you see it was just an Instagram notification. You groaned and laid back on the couch, your head resting on the armrest. The silence of the house wasn’t helping to ease your mind but managed to make it worse. Your thoughts were starting to conflict with each other as the idea of being mad at him started to become more acquainted with the front of your mind. Choosing to break the silence, you picked up the remote that sat on the coffee table and turned on the TV. 
Soon your food had arrived and it was now ten o’clock. Though the hours were passing rather quickly, the idea of seeing Joost before you went to sleep kept your mind awake. The random romcom you had turned on was also helping. Ironically the movie took place on Valentine’s Day. It was one of your favorite movies to watch on this holiday, but this time felt sour. As embarrassing as it felt to admit, watching a fictional couple spend the day together unlike you made you feel worse. Like a small jab to your heart. But you watched the movie anyway as it was beloved to you. You had finished your food a little over halfway through the movie. You gathered all of your trash and made your way to the kitchen where you dumped it all. You leaned on the counter, phone in your hand. You opened his contact and your finger hovered over the call button. Every minute that passed made you worry more and more and his lack of communication was making it worse. But you hesitate anyway because he could still be busy, maybe his phone died, or he left it somewhere. 
Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of your front door being unlocked. You walked around the counter and watched in anticipation as the door was pushed open. You feel the negative thoughts and worries wash away as he walks in. He walked in as if in a haze. His head was pointing to the floor and he walked with heavy footsteps. He hadn’t noticed you until he was only a few feet away from you. His eyes were quick to find yours. He smiled lovingly and you watched as his body visibly relaxed. He gently cupped your cheeks with his hands, his eyes scanning your face as if seeing you anew. You raised one of your hands to cover his, your warmth contrasting with the coolness of his fingers. He softly pulled you into a kiss. It was sweet the way his lips danced with yours. Your hands rested on his hips and your fingers played with the hem of the soft fabric. He pulled away first with a pained expression.
“I’m so so sorry schat (baby). I really wanted to be here with you today.” His hands were still settled on both sides of your face and his thumb rubbed softly against your cheek. “Please forgive me. I promise I’m gonna make it up to you.” 
You shook your head, “It’s okay. I know how busy you get.” you give him a reassuring smile. “Plus the gift you left for me this morning makes up for it.” 
He let out a breath of relief, “I’m happy you liked it.” 
He was still tense and you could tell. An idea quickly pops into your head to help him relax. Once again the distance closed between you two, but you initiated it. This time there was something different and he noticed. The way your lips hungrily latched onto his. He melted into you completely, letting you take control. Your hands slipped under his shirt, feeling the cold, bare skin beneath. The warmth of your fingers against him sent shivers down his spine. Your kisses trailed from his lips to his cheek and down his neck. He hummed in response. 
“I think it’s time that I gave you my gift.” You spoke, your voice barely above a whisper. Your warm breath against his ear sent goosebumps across his skin. The bulge in his pants became more apparent as he lightly rutted against your thigh letting you know how desperately he craved for you. Normally he could hold himself together, especially in front of you. But after the long day he’s had, he doesn’t have the strength to. His brain was too fogged and all he could make of it was how painfully hard he was. He wanted to tell you how much he wanted to feel you, hear your pretty moans in his ear. But words couldn’t form in his mouth, only pathetic whimpers would breeze past his lips. So instead you get to see him like this. Breathing heavily against your skin, quietly begging for your touch. He looked at you through dazed eyes and you could’ve melted right there. Instead, you took one of his hands in yours and walked him into the living room. 
You pressed a hand to his chest, pushing him to sit on the couch. You sunk to your knees, and he pulled his shirt off and threw it somewhere on the floor. He instinctively spreads his legs allowing you to come closer. Your hands ran over his thighs and came up to his belt buckle. He watched as your hands worked his pants and pulled them down. Once they were at his ankles, you looked over at his boxers. His cock was begging to be freed from his boxers. Your hands came to rub on his thighs again and you felt how tense he still was. 
“Baby you can relax. Let me care of you.” You cooed and he let out a hesitant breath. He was having trouble relaxing. It was because he was so pent up and you could tell. You moved your hands up his thighs and over his bulge. His breath hitched as he felt the warmth of your hand. You slowly moved it, palming him through his boxers. His cock twitched under your hand. A quiet moan escaped his lips as he leaned his head back on the couch. His hips bucked up because he needed more friction. He quickly looked at you with a slightly panicked expression. As if he was scared you stopped because he moved. And even under the dim light of the room, you swear you could see him mouth the words ‘sorry’. You placed one of your hands on his thigh, your thumb running soft circles into the skin. Silently reassuring him.
You decided you’d tortured him enough and hooked your fingers into the waistline of his boxers. He lifts his hips giving you space to pull them down. You watched as his cock sprung from the tight material. It was slightly red with precum leaking from it, leaving a small, sticky spot on his stomach where it rests. You spit on your hand before wrapping it around the base. His breath hitched. You began to move your hand at an agonizingly slow pace. Breathy moans fell from his lips. You brought your lips down to his thigh, kissing and biting the soft skin. Your kisses trailed to the skin near the base of his cock. Your cheek brushed softly against him sending a shiver down his spine. You planted kisses along the vein that led to his tip. The noises he made slowly became louder and louder the closer to you became. 
“fuck schat (baby). p-please please…” he knew what he wanted but words were failing him. His brain was clouded by pleasure, and the only clear thought he had was you. 
“Please what?” You tilted your head to the side. Your voice was soft, faux innocence laced in your tone. He hesitated before he spoke and tried to regain his thoughts so he could form a coherent sentence.
“I need you. I need to feel more of you,” he begged. His eyes met yours and were glossed over. You never get to see him like this. So needy and desperate. He looked so pretty in these moments you thought to yourself. “Please.”
You didn’t waste any more time before you took him into your mouth, taking in only his tip first. He melted at the sensation, a low groan emitting from his lips. You took in a few more inches and he was quickly losing what was left of his composure. His lip was bleeding from hard he was biting to quiet the noises he was making. It was when you started to hum that a moan slipped out. You thought your name sounded so sweet when it rolled off his tongue in moments like this. His hand was quick to find its way into your hair. He was trying to guide you the way he wanted and take control. But you weren’t having it, so you grabbed his wrist and set his hand back on the couch. Although you didn’t say anything, he still understood. It was a strain not to touch you. He needs to feel something, to ground himself. One hand was gripping the plush fabric of the couch and the other rested on his stomach.
You took in as much of him as you could and used your hand to get what you couldn’t. He watched as his cock disappeared into your mouth. He could’ve came right there at the sight. You brought your head back up just to sink down again. The noises that were coming from him were borderline pornographic. Moans mixed with your name. As you picked up the pace, tears started to form in the corners of his eyes. They fell the closer he got. He was so lost in pleasure. Everything he was thinking about earlier, whatever he was feeling was gone and long forgotten. All he could think about or feel was you and how good he felt because of you.
Quiet pleas started to pour from his mouth as he was getting closer. He couldn’t even form a coherent sentence to let you know he was close. But as if you could read his mind, you knew. You quickened your pace again and your hand was matching your speed. He wanted this. He needed this. He needed to get lost in your touch.  A string of moans mixed with your name was all that could be heard from. You took him fully into your mouth and that was enough to send him over the edge. His hips bucked up into your mouth, pushing himself further into your throat. The world felt as though it stopped spinning as he reached the edge. It struck his body like electricity, and he swore he could see stars. You felt his cock pulsing as you tried to stop yourself from gagging and you felt his cum go down your throat. You let him ride out his high before he pulled himself from your mouth. 
He sat back down on the couch, and saw him finally relax. You looked at him with a smile on your face. He gave you a tired smile in return. You stood up and placed a kiss on his forehead. Your hands found their way into his and you gently pulled him, gesturing him to stand up. He did so and you helped him pull his boxers and pants up. You guided him to your bedroom where you told him to sit.
“I’m going to run a shower for you. Okay?” He nodded tiredly. You placed a small kiss on his lips before disappearing into the bathroom to run some water. When it felt warm enough you walked back out to where he was sitting. He was still in the same spot and was fidgeting with the fabric of his jeans. You brought your hand up to his cheek and your thumb rubbed gently. He leaned into your touch. Taking his hands into yours, you lead him into the bathroom where you both stripped out of your clothes. He followed you in the bathroom where you both get undressed. He immediately stepped inside the shower, letting the warm water run over his body. You were quick to help him get clean and he just leaned into you. He was so exhausted now and you just wanted to get him to bed as quickly as possible. Once you were both finished, you both got dressed and went back into your bedroom. You were first to get into bed and he quickly followed suit. He snuggled close into you, his head resting on your chest. You brought your hand up to run your fingers through his hair.
“Ik hou van jou (i love you),” he mumbled. You can tell he was fighting to stay awake at this point.
“I love you too.” you kissed his forehead before dozing off.
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honeyedmiller · 11 months ago
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An Ode to Forever | Joel Miller
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pairing: joel miller x f!reader
rating: 18+, minors dni.
warnings: mostly pwp, sex in a bathtub with lots of feelings, fluff, tenderness, they’re both so sickeningly in love, smut (vaginal fingering, unprotected piv, joel is handsy af, some butt stuff [lol]), light alcohol consumption, sort of erotic food consumption(not really tho???), use of daddy twice in this (idk what came over me), joel doesn’t have kids in this, no use of y/n.
word count: 3.2k
synopsis: after an arduous day, joel draws a bath to help you both relax.
or
an ode to how much you love joel miller, and he, you.
a/n: this is a lil valentine’s day one shot i wanted to put out. slowly getting my writing juju back. this is also a follower milestone celebration. thank you to everyone who supports my work. love you all <3
divider by @saradika-graphics
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It’d been a rough day.
A day where bones ached, minds were exhausted and all that was yearned for was to be home with each other.
You’d texted Joel that you were stopping off at the store to get some wine because hell, you needed to relax. He instantly texted you back to be safe and that he loves you.
He loves you, he loves you, he loves you.
A true love like this is something you’d never in a million years think you’d ever have to yourself. Someone who cares so much. Someone you can cherish. A love that was all your own. You were so wrapped up in the bliss of Joel Miller, and he, you.
It was the kind of love that was terrifying and beautiful and gut wrenching and so fucking rare. A love that made you feel like you were floating in the clouds, euphoria pumping through your veins every time you looked at him. The kind of love that was a forever thing. Something you never, ever thought you’d have.
He loves you, he loves you, he loves you.
The lights were off when you got home. You call out his name, hanging your keys on your designated hook before toeing off your pumps.
“Up here.” He calls back, voice cascading down the stairs. You make your way up and into the bedroom, setting your work bag down before you look around in confusion.
“Joel?” You call out, and his broad frame emerges from the bathroom.
“Hey baby.” He says. You smile softly at the sight of him, body visibly relaxing in his presence. Joel notices and the corner of his mouth twitches upward into a smile.
“Hi.” Your voice is as soft as your expression, allowing him to envelope the whole of your being into his strong, warm arms. He kisses your temple before gently taking the pinot grigio out of your hands, humming at your wine choice.
“Take your work clothes off and meet me in the bathroom.” He gives your forehead a kiss before disappearing again. You cock your eyebrow in confusion, but oblige to his request anyhow. You strip off your clothes, leaving your body clad in just your bra and underwear. The plush carpet beneath your bare feet feels heavenly after a day of wearing those pumps for work.
The cold tile of the bathroom sends a chill up your spine, but you ignore the sensation when you take in all that’s in front of you—a bubble bath with rose petals scattered atop, candles lit on the side of the tub, and a small tray of chocolate covered strawberries waiting to be devoured. Wine glasses filled with two cubes of ice each sit perfectly next to the strawberries, along with the pinot grigio.
You feel the sting of tears immediately. Your eyes move over to Joel, who’s standing with his hands behind his back and a boyish grin adorning his handsome face.
“What—what’s this?” Your voice is meek, eyes glossy and bottom lip slightly trembling.
“I know we won’t get that much time to ourselves on Valentine’s Day, so I thought we’d celebrate a little early. Y‘know, a nice way to relax after a tough day.”
“Joel, honey, this is perfect.”
“Yeah? You like it?”
You turn to face him fully. “I love it. And I love you.” You close the distance between the both of you, pulling him in for a tender kiss. He hums against your lips, enveloping your body into his arms. He slides his hands down to your ass, giving it a playful tap.
He unravels his arms from you before taking a small step back, shucking off his shirt and his pants. He looks at you as you watch him, desire for him pooling your eyes. A glint of fascination crosses his gaze as he studies you studying him.
“One more thing.” Joel says before stepping out of the bathroom. A minute later, soft tunes of Frank Sinatra wafted throughout the bedroom and into the bathroom. He comes back in with a smile on his face as he grabs your hand and twirls you before kissing you. You couldn’t help but smile against him.
He pulls down his underwear and climbs into the tub, groaning at the warm water against his achy bones.
“C’mere, sweet girl.” He nudges his head, holding his hand out to you. You smile and remove your bra and underwear, climbing into the tub with him. The warm water eased the tension that was left in your body, rolling off your shoulders and dissipating into the aroma of scented bubbles. Lavender, you think.
Joel pulls you back against his body, warm and inviting as you lean on him and close your eyes. You sit like that for a minute—still, calm, and silent. It’s what you both needed. Days like this could be more than overstimulating, and Joel knew that. You both basked in the fact that you could sit in silence in each other’s presence and be perfectly content.
You felt movement behind you, only to see Joel reaching for the wine bottle. He opens it with ease and pours the wine into the two glasses, clinking his with yours in a soft ‘cheers.’
Joel set his glass down on the edge of the tub, hands landing on your shoulders. Water sloshed gingerly with his movements. He started to dig his thumbs into the tense muscle. You couldn’t help but groan, head lolling to the side slowly.
“Feel good?” Joel chuckles close to your ear, goosebumps raising at the low vibrato of his voice.
“Mhm,” You manage.
Joel leans his mouth down to the base of your neck, leaving tender kisses in his wake. Your nails trace patterns on his thick thighs, the slow drag pulling at the need for you within him.
Your touch, your smile, your voice, your laugh, you. You drove him absolutely crazy. This man loved you more than life itself. If he could give you the whole world, he would—but for once in his life he knew he was enough.
“I love you, darlin’.” Joel’s voice is nearly a whisper. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, kissing your soft flesh repeatedly.
You crane your neck to face him and his hands drop to your arms.
“I love you more, cowboy.”
He scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Not possible.”
“Mm.” You muse, leaning in to kiss him. Those same rumbling butterflies stir in your stomach, heart strings pulling at the softness of his lips and how perfect they feel slotted with yours.
His tongue easily made its way into your mouth as you slid a hand into his slightly graying curls. You moaned into him, your other free hand gripping his thigh tighter as the neediness ignites within your body.
See, that was the thing. Joel had you wrapped around his fingers. He knew exactly what made you tick.
His hands slowly slide to your breasts, kneading them with such care before pinching both of your nipples between his thumbs and index fingers. You gasp into the kiss at the sensation as it travels down like hot liquid to your core, already pulsing with aching need.
Joel’s small chuckle separates the kiss, and you lean your forehead against his cheek as he continues to toy with your pillowy flesh. Your breathing begins to stagger, mind clouded with the carnal desire for the man who’s stolen your heart.
“Joel,” You’re breathless, legs mindlessly rubbing together for any friction you can get. “Please.”
“Please what, baby?” His chest rumbles with the low vibrato of his voice, goosebumps erupting on your skin once more.
“Fuck. Touch me. Please, Joel.”
“Fuckin’ love when my girl uses her manners. How do you want daddy to touch you?” His voice is a low growl, one hand easily gliding down the curves of your body before his fingertips brush over your mound. You can’t help the soft whimper that escapes you as he easily spreads your legs with his hand, running his middle finger down your slit. “Like this?”
You suck in a breath behind clenched teeth, head dropping back onto his shoulder as he starts to slowly drag his fingers over your slick sex. Even underwater, Joel could feel how aroused you are.
“Answer me, sweet girl. Tell me.”
“Y-yes. God, yes–please—fuck me with your fingers.”
You’ve come to learn how to be more vocal with Joel, always shying away from telling him what you wanted when it came to your pleasure at first. He eventually coaxed it out of you, telling you that there’s no reason to be shy around him. He’d take care of you all the same.
You knew that, but you were still grateful for the man being patient with you when words would get lodged into your throat, seemingly unwilling to be vocalized. It got easier over time, and the confidence you radiated when you and Joel initiated anything intimate was a show he’d always want a front seat to.
You moaned as he easily slipped a finger into you, disappearing down to the knuckle. It was a welcome stretch, his fingers always reaching places yours never could. But it wasn’t enough. You needed more.
“Another one, please.” You sigh, rutting your hips down to grind onto his hand. He easily complies, this time a little bit more of a tight fit. You moan at the sensation, and Joel has a crooked grin on his face as he starts to languidly pump his fingers in and out of you. He was teasing you, you think, because he wanted to hear you beg him to go faster. And, truthfully, you weren’t above doing so.
“Such pretty sounds you make for me, baby,” He starts to pick up his pace, and you subconsciously bite your lip to quiet yourself down. “Uh uh, don’t go all shy on me now, darlin’. Wanna hear you. Wanna hear how I make you feel.”
“You know—shit—you know how you make me feel, Joel,” You reason with him, “You drive me fucking crazy.”
“Good.”
That was all he said before he picked up the pace of his fingers, curling them to press against the spongy spot in you that had your eyes rolling back and your toes curling. He swiped his thumb over your clit, finding a steady rhythm with his fingers.
One of your hands had his thigh in a vice grip, likely to leave scratch marks on his tan skin while the other held onto the edge of the tub. That same liquid heat traveled throughout the course of your body, pooling at the bottom of your spine. Waiting. Wanting. Begging to be released. You grind your hips down to match his pace, just needed a bit more of a push.
The whimpers and moans that eluded you only added to Joel’s own arousal, the occasional grunt from him reverberating off of the bathroom walls. His cock was solid against your back, and you couldn’t help but think how much self control this man had.
“Can feel your pretty pussy clenchin’ my fingers, sweetheart. You gonna come on them? Hm?” His lips are at your ear now, poking his tongue out to lick your earlobe before nibbling on it.
“Yes—oh, fuckfuckfuck. Right there, Joel, please don’t stop. Pleasepleaseplease—” You’re a begging, whimpering mess before you come undone, whole body shuddering as your orgasm washes over you so intensely.
“There you go. That’s it. My girl always does so well, hm? So fuckin’ well.” Joel praises you, slowly sliding his fingers out of you before running them over your slit once more, featherlight and meticulous. You shudder at the sensation, a choked moan escaping the hollows of your throat.
“What do you say?” Joel teases, riling you up.
“Thank you, daddy.” You laugh softly, giving his thigh a gentle squeeze.
You sit up and turn yourself around, careful not to slosh any water outside of the tub. Joel has an amused look on his face and you huff a laugh through your nose before kissing him. It was passionate, like something you’d see in those romance movies on the big screen.
It’s a silent promise, something that can’t be put into words. It surges through your veins and exists in you all the time, heightened by the very man that made you feel these things again.
You pull apart from him, rubbing your nose against his before you lean back to take in his handsome features. His dark brown eyes gleamed with budding love.
Your gaze shifts to the untouched strawberries, and you pluck one off of the plate before taking a bite. It’s sweet; the mixture of chocolate and the fruit dancing on your taste buds. You hold the rest of the strawberry to Joel’s lips, and he grins before taking a bigger bite. You place the calyx back on the tray, gaze drifting to Joel again.
You grin when you see some chocolate on his bottom lip.
“You got a little…” Your words die in your throat as you lean forward, licking his bottom lip before kissing him again. You move to straddle his lap, hips flexing to fit around the broadness of him.
“Be mine forever.” He whispers against you.
“I’m already yours, Joel. You’ve always had me.”
You trail a hand down his chest, toying with his hair before sliding your palm down his torso as your nails slightly scrape his flesh. You plant soft kisses all along his collarbone, tongue poking out to lick his already wet skin.
Your wandering hand brushes through the tuft, wiry hair that sat atop his aching cock. You hum against him and wrap your hand around his length. He pulses in your hand, heavy and waiting to be relieved. You begin to slide your hand up and down his silky flesh, nipping at his collarbone as you did so.
Joel sucks in a breath behind clenched teeth, eyes closing in pure bliss as he tries to refrain from bucking up into your hand.
“Such a pretty cock. Love it so much.” You muse, and Joel groans at your words. He’ll never get used to you worshiping him and his body the way you do, he thinks.
But, he loves it all the same. It makes his heart fucking flutter, and even though he’ll probably never openly admit it, he loves it. It makes him feel worthy. Wanted. Loved.
“It’d look even prettier buried in that perfect pussy.” He says, and your movements falter for a split second. You don’t think you’ll ever get used to his filthy mouth, but it was something you couldn’t get enough of.
You look down at him with hooded eyes and a satiated grin before lifting your hips up to hover over him, swiping his tip over your folds before sinking down on him. You’re slow with your movements, wanting to feel every ridge and vein his pretty, pretty cock has.
You both moan in harmony as you reach the hilt.
“So-fuckin’-perfect.” Joel grits, head lolling back as he takes in the sensation of your warmth wrapped around him so perfectly, like you were specifically made to be there. And you are, you think.
Your hands rest on his shoulders as you start gliding up and down on him, the stretch so welcoming every time you fully sink back down. Joel’s hands settle onto your ass to guide you into a steady pace. He wraps his lips around one of your nipples, giving it a soft bite, and you gasp at the sensation. Joel could feel you clenching around him with every pass of his tongue on your sensitive bud.
One of your hands tangles itself into his curls once more, giving them a little tug. His eyes pop open and he lets go of your nipple with a small ‘pop’, gaze never wavering from yours. You toss him a saccharine smile before kissing the tip of his nose.
“So handsome.” You whisper, kissing every high point of his face before resting your forehead against his once more.
“Yeah?” He asks, fingers grazing down on your ass slotting themselves between the crevice of both cheeks.
“Mhm.” You bite your lip, knowing what was coming. It was something new that you tried around a month ago and really liked, so Joel would implement the action whenever he could.
The tip of his middle finger circled around the tight ring of your asshole, a wicked grin on his lips as your hips stuttered.
“Gotta fill you all the way up, darlin’.” He chuckles as he pushes his middle finger into your tight hole.
Your eyes clamp shut tight, feeling so full of the man you love.
“Fuck, god, Joel– feels s’good.” Your words are slurring together and you’re trying your damnedest to keep the pace of your hips steady, maybe even riding him a little faster if that means his finger in your ass will pump faster, too.
“I know, baby. Doin’ so well. So good for me, hm? Takin’ what I give ya, so full n’ all.” He cooes, nosing at your jaw as your mouth falls slack and eyebrows thread together.
The pleasure coursing through your body is devastatingly euphoric, the sensation of him everywhere driving you crazy in all the right ways.
You know it wouldn’t be long before you fell apart at the seams for him once more.
That deep, throaty growl he does while his eyes are shut in concentration, and the pulsing feeling of his cock is a dead giveaway that he’s going to fall apart for you, too.
“‘M close, Joel.” You’re clawing at his back now, his finger curling inside you as you bury your face into his neck.
Your hips burn from straddling his wide frame, desperate for a break, but you won’t stop. Not until You’re falling apart for him and he, you.
“I know, sweet girl. Can feel ya. Give it t’me, c’mon.” He groans, fucking up into you. His jaw ticks as his teeth clench, feeling you pulsing around him as you cry out his name in pure bliss. Another orgasm crashes through you, eyes rolling back as your body goes limp on his.
It only takes him a few more thrusts before he’s coming, filling you with everything he has. He moans with every stutter of his hips as his chest heaves up and down, body following suit with yours and going completely limp. He removes his finger from you slowly before you lift yourself off of him, already missing the feeling of being so full.
You stay wrapped up in eachother for a few minutes, giving yourselves the chance to catch your breaths. You kiss his chest repeatedly, placing your hand over his rapidly beating heart.
“I love you. So fucking much, Miller.” You laugh softly, tracing patterns on his chest as your head presses against the solidity of it.
The feeling of his beating heart surges life into you. Knowing that you get to exist at the same time as this gorgeous, loving man is a feeling you couldn’t even begin to comprehend. There really are no words for it, you think. At least not strong enough to describe the feeling.
“I love you too, darlin’. Forever.”
And then you think to yourself, you’d do life over and over again if it meant you got to meet Joel in every single one of them.
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i’m such a fucking sap dude. lmfaooo anyway, hope y’all enjoyed <3
tags: @nostalxgic ; @ilovepedro ; @endlessthxxghts ; @punkshort ; @joelsgreys ; @pamasaur ; @cool-iguana ; @joeloverture
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skzdarlings · 11 months ago
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mine ; lee minho x reader
original ask: requested by @tattywood. “Can you please do ❛ you're mine. you've always been mine. ❜ with Lee Know? I just know you’ll come up with something amazing! 🩶"
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pairing: lee minho/reader content info: another pair of star-crossed lovers lol. reader is kissed by a different guy without her permission. possessive sex. unsafe sex. lots of biting and marking and grabbing. word count: 3700 words.
masterlist. part of the valentine’s day stories series. credit to prompts. requests are closed.
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You finally escape.
When the date is over and your supposed boyfriend leaves, you run out the back door.  Your parents are distracted, waving goodbye to your boyfriend as he pulls away in his expensive car.  They chat between themselves on the front porch of the family estate. 
“Such a remarkable young man,” they say.  “So wholesome.  So intelligent.“
So rich, is what they really mean.  Because he is not wholesome; he is a bully and a bigot at the best of times.  He derides anyone he deems beneath him, which is just about everyone.  He is also not intelligent, as true depth of intellect is revealed in conduct.  Someone that cruel and ignorant is not intelligent.  You have engaged in more stimulating discourse with birds.
But he is wealthy.  Your parents picked him for you and have been forcing the relationship along, contriving dates without telling you he will be there, inviting him into your home, encouraging his empty and shallow affection.  You encourage nothing, sitting stiffly whenever he touches you: an arm slung around your waist, a hand on your lower back, a kiss on the cheek.
Maybe you were naïve to think it would not escalate before its time, that you could bear it cordially until his interest withered and died.  Foolish.  He is not here for you but your name.  He does not care how you feel.  He does not care if you want him.  He wants the money and connections and power, sharing a bed with your parents through you.
Today he cornered you when you were alone.  He backed you into the wall and kissed you.  An unwanted kiss is a disgustingly slimy thing, all tongue and teeth and the bad, unfamiliar taste of a vile man’s breath.
Your whole unlived life flashed in your mind’s eye.  Every second was irredeemably awful.
So you run.  Out the back door, to the garage, weaving around your father’s cars.  Your old bike is hooked on its rack and you lift it down with some grunting effort.  You are dressed for a date, wearing a pristine ivory dress your mother picked, white lace stockings, and delicate flats.  It is not the ideal outfit for riding a bike.  It is a pretty but flimsy thing.  Summer nights are warm but there is a crisp breath on the wind as the sun sets. 
But if you stop for even a second, even just to change clothes, even just to catch your breath, then you will never get away. 
You swing onto your bike and escape via the back lane.  It is a long ride across town but your adrenaline propels you onward.
It is very obvious when you have crossed into new territory.  Across the park trail and over the railroad tracks is a different world.  The houses get smaller, more ramshackle, junk piled around the fully abandoned abodes.  Even the lived-in homes have old trucks and rusted goods stacked on their lawns.  It is a consequence of impoverished anxiety, hoarding in fear of one day having nothing.
Indeed, a very different part of town. 
Your parents are probably furious they cannot find you, but they will assume you ran to a nearby friend’s house.  If they knew where you really were, which friend you went to see, they would surpass furious and venture all the way into horror. 
But they are far away now.
You feel nothing but relief as the air changes.  You know it is the chill of a summer night as the sky turns blue, but it convinces you the air is clearer.  You exhale and feel as though you are releasing a breath that you have been holding all day.
Your journey takes you to a familiar yard.  You remember the first time you ever visited, standing so small and uncertain on the front steps, waiting for a kiss you actually wanted.
A kiss that never came.  
You park your bike against the side of the house.  You walk up the front steps on shaky legs, weak from speedy riding.    
You open the screen door to knock on the inside door.  While you wait for an answer, you fiddle with your appearance, adjusting any evidence of wind-swept dishevelment.
Oh, you are so nervous.  You were so hellbent on just getting here, you did not register any feeling beyond determination. But now you are standing on this porch in your flimsy white dress, the sun set, the day done.  You are doing something you should have done a long, long time ago and suddenly fearing you are far, far too late. 
No answer comes.  You knock again.
Your stomach forms a pit you hope you will eat you whole.  Is he ignoring you?  No.  The windows are shut, the blinds closed.  He cannot even see you.
You take a step back.  Even with everything sealed shut, you should be able to see a hint of light.  The house is small, a single story.  There are only so many places he could be.
He isn’t home, you realize, first with relief that he is not ignoring you, then with dejection.  Of course he’s not home, you tell yourself.  What were you even thinking?  Silly girl.  Riding all the way out here, expecting him to be sitting around and waiting for you.  He has a life of his own.  He probably doesn’t even think about you.  You’re pathetic.
You know you are being a little melodramatic.  Your emotions have been running at an extreme all day.  They finally become too much to bear.  You sit down on the steps and cry. 
Some time passes.  You eventually calm yourself enough to wipe your eyes.  You feel the cold more acutely now, wrapping your arms around yourself for warmth. 
You are not sure what to do now.  You refuse to go home, knowing what awaits you.  You have nowhere else to go. Your future is murky, which is still more comforting than the vision of it when your boyfriend forcibly kissed you.   
You sigh.  You know if you wait long enough, your friend will come home and help you.  Even if he doesn’t want you, even if he can be a bit standoffish at times, he has the warmest heart you know.  You met doing volunteer work, in fact.  You know he will help you like he would help anyone in need.
It does not mean you do not feel pathetic, curled up and shivering on his porch steps.  You are debating a course of action when a truck rolls into the yard with a flash of headlights and a noticeably hiccupping engine.  It pulls around the side of the house.
You stand and take tentative steps to follow.  You are still and quiet as the rough rumble of the truck comes to a wheezy stop. 
The driver door flies open.  He jumps out, cursing.  Your breath catches and all your hypotheticals dissipate in wake of the reality of him.
Lee Minho.
He is wearing his old, dusty leather jacket, something of a signature piece due its reliability.  His jeans are torn at the knee, likely a legitimate tear and not a fashion statement, his old work boots a bit scuffed.  He is a working man of limited means and nothing functional goes to waste.  
He is beautiful as ever.  Dark hair falls across his forehead and he pushes it back with a forceful rake, the softer pieces fluttering forward again.  He has an athletic frame, but delicate features despite his near-perpetual scowl.  When he does laugh, it is a hilariously boisterous sound.
He is scowling right now.  Cursing to himself as he stomps around the beat-up truck.  He wears a carabiner with a bundle of emergency tools, grabbing a miniature flashlight to guide his way.  He props open the hood and starts rustling around inside.  He curses again, then he puts the light away so he can reach inside with both hands.
You do not mean to startle him.  You thought he might have seen you, observant as he is, but apparently the truck has him distracted.
“Minho,” you say. 
You cannot see him too well in the dark, but you hear the distinctive thud of metal as he undoubtedly smacks his head on the open hood.  He curses louder this time. 
There is a small light on the side of the house.  You step towards it at the same time. 
He is rubbing the back of his head, frowning, but he comes to a total stop when he sees you.  His eyes widen ever so slightly, his brows drawn in confusion.  He stares intently at you. 
“Hi,” you say.
He just keeps staring. 
“Um. I was just in the neighbourhood,” you say.  “I wanted to see you.  I hope you’re doing well.”
He drops his arm and it swings at his side.  He continues to stare at you, the furrow in his brow more intense. 
“Right,” you say.  You feel a catch in the back of your throat.  Fortunately, you have cried all your tears and will not make a fool of yourself in front of him.  More of a fool, that is.  You want to say so many things but you cannot think of a single word that suffices. 
I missed you so much, you think.  I think about you every day.  Have you thought about me?
It sounds so clingy and pathetic.  Your boyfriend derides such women and their neediness.  Minho is not a man like that, though.  He has never spoken so disparagingly about someone.  You know that, but the words catch nonetheless. 
You exhale a shaky breath, looking aside at nothing. 
“I’m sorry,” you finally say.  “I probably shouldn’t have come here.  It’s been months since we last spoke.  I know we’re not really friends anymore.  I just had no where else to go and I…”
“You were crying,” he says. 
You look at him.  His expression has not softened.  It is still that same scrutinizing stare.  His gaze is intently locked on yours, on eyes that must show the evidence of your crying. 
You wipe your face quickly, embarrassed.  Your gaze lifts when he takes a small step towards you.  He reaches for you, as if he means to wipe your eyes himself, but then he catches the sight of his own hand, covered in black grease from the truck. 
“Shit,” he says, and snaps his arm back. 
“Minho,” you say, your heart fluttering just from the suggestion he was going to touch you.  A small touch from him means more than anything. 
“Princess,” he says, an old affectionate nickname for you, though he speaks it rather dryly.  He is still frowning.  “Are you hurt?”
“Maybe,” you say.  When he reacts physically, his shoulders stiffening, you quickly add, “Not like that.  Emotionally, I mean.  I just… I think I ran away from home.”
“You think,” he says flatly.
“Well, I didn’t really think it through, to be honest,” you say shyly.  “I just… I couldn’t stay there anymore.  You know what they’re like.” 
He flinches as if the memory comes with a strike.  You feel embarrassed, remembering too. 
You and Minho became fast friends through your mutual volunteer efforts.  You thought nothing of inviting him to a neighbourhood party at your parents’ house.  He wore his nicest shirt and fresh pants, but as soon as everyone found out where he came from, they wanted nothing to do with him. 
You are embarrassed to say you did not even notice at first, naively taking politeness for granted.  He had to explain it to you, then you saw their two-facedness everywhere and felt horrible.
You stayed on his side of town after that, at least until your parents put their foot down.  They didn’t want you developing feelings for that kind of boy.   You insisted he was just a friend, even while already in love with him.  His biting wit and good heart had you in thrall. 
You were in denial about your parents being bad people.  You wanted to believe they had your best interest at heart.  They were just set in their ways.  They wanted a good life for you.  You told Minho to just give them time.  He let you go.  They introduced you to your new boyfriend the next day. 
Minho takes a breath.  He shoves his tongue into his cheek, looking pensive.  You are thinking of something to say when he nods his head. 
“You look cold,” he says frankly.  “Let’s go inside.”
You nod, following him to the front steps.  He grabs the porch rail and jumps the steps in an effortless swing.  You shuffle behind him while he unlocks the door. 
He says nothing, just nods at you.  You follow him through, closing the door while he bends down to unlace his boots.  He kicks them to the side while you step softly out of your flats.  When you meet each other’s eyes, you feel a spark. 
You stood in this very spot a few months ago, almost nose to nose, arguing about your parents and what to do.  You knew, deep in your heart, the conversation was not about a mere friendship.  You both had stronger feelings, but you were both scared to act on them given your precarious circumstance.  He did not want to risk everything while you were indecisive.  You wanted to keep everything. 
You have lived a life of great privilege and you are used to getting everything you want.  You have had to confront reality, that you cannot always have everything.   
So, if you can only have one thing, you want him. 
He looks at you with the same dark passion as then.  Your heart skips beats under his intense gaze. 
“You’re here,” he says. Maybe the same memories flicker through his mind.  He tips his head, looking at you so closely, like he cannot believe you are real.   
“Yes,” you say softly, clasping your hands in front of you. “I’m here.” 
“To stay,” he says.
“If you’ll have me,” you reply.  Your heart is beating so hard, it is a wonder he cannot hear it.  Your legs feel even weaker than before, but this time is has nothing to do with bicycles and everything to do with him. 
He swallows, his throat bobbing.  He sniffs and looks aside while idly tugging his jacket.   
“And your boyfriend?” he says, glaring at the far wall. 
Your heart sinks.  It is your turn to swallow. 
“You know about that?” you ask. 
He laughs, not that gleeful sound you know but a sharp cackle.  He looks at you incredulously. 
“Of course I know,” he says.  “I don’t always stay on my side of the tracks.  Sometimes,” he speaks with sarcastic wonder, “I get to repair houses for the pretty rich people.”  He huffs, shaking his head.  “It’s fine,” he says.  “You should be with someone like that.  He’ll give you the house.  The car.  I bet your parents love him too.”
“I don’t want those things,” you say, bearing his bitterness because you understand what he is feeling.  You lift your chin and look him in the eye.  “You’re right, my parents do love him.  But I don’t.  He’s shallow and unkind.  And you—”  Your voice catches.  “You, Lee Minho, are anything but that.  You are everything.  And I… I love you.  I always have.”  You drop your eyes with this confession, suddenly overwhelmed with the sheer emotion pouring out of his gaze.  “I know it’s been a while,” you say.  “I don’t expect you to have waited for me.  I just—”
He laughs again.  It is still dry, but not so sharp.  You glance at him. 
“Princess,” he says. “Don’t tell me you seriously think I could just forget about you.”  He shakes his head.  “It’s like you don’t even know me.  I should kick you out just for that.”
You realize he is joking, the faintest hint of something warm melting his scowl. 
“I can’t give you that life,” he says seriously. 
You step towards him, holding his gaze, pouring as much emotion back at him.  He exhales, blinking quickly, long lashes fluttering as he looks at you. 
“I have no idea what we’re gonna do,” you admit.  “But I know I want to figure it out.  With you.  And no one else.” 
He smiles and it makes you smile.  Then he reaches for you, but stops when he once more remembers his dirty hands. 
“Shit,” he says again, then takes a step back.  “Let me just—”
You take him by the wrist and yank him towards you.  He follows your guidance, his breath catching when you plant his hand on your hip.  It will leave a big black stain on your perfect white dress, the shape of his hand in a possessive grip on your body. 
It is more effective than any word.  He swoops in and kisses you, his other hand cupping your other hip with the same deliberate possessiveness.   You are certain this horrid little gown will be destroyed and you do not care one bit.  You wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him back. 
“You’re cruel,” he says between kisses.  “Torturing me for so long.  I wanted to kill that man.  But I thought he made you happy—”
“He disgusted me,” you say.  “He kissed me without my permission today.”
“What.”  That stops the kiss and he looks at you with that scowl again.  “I’ll kill him,” he says without any hesitation. 
You just laugh a gentle laugh, shaking your head.  You twist a longer tuft of his hair around your finger, making his tense shoulders go soft as he leans in. 
“You don’t have to kill him,” you say.  “Just make me forget him.” 
Oh, Lee Minho is such an awful tease all the time.  Of course he goes back to just staring at you with a contemplative air, making you wriggle and wonder in his arms.  You whine his name, trying to kiss him, but he dodges it.  Your whimpering makes him laugh, because of course it does. 
Then he gets very serious.  Your heart sends a bolt of heat shooting through your body.  Your thighs press together. 
He presses his forehead to yours.  You gasp when you feel his fingers on your back, the careful slow touch as he tugs your zipper down.  The flimsy dress slides off your body as he steps back to look at you.  You shiver, gazing back at him.  His stare is unflinching as he peels off his jacket and tosses it aside.  His hands are already much cleaner, the distinctive print of his palms still plastered to your dress.  He wipes the rest on his own shirt then tugs it off and tosses it to the side. 
He smirks and wiggles two come hither fingers at you, walking backwards.  You follow him slowly, then give chase when he cackles and runs.  You follow him into the bedroom where he literally sweeps you off your feet.
“And you say I’m cruel,” you tease.   
He closes the door with a firm snap then leans you against it. 
“You are,” he says.  He looks down your body while running his fingers through his hair.  “You are.” 
Then he gets on his knees, first one while he tugs your panties down, then the other, when he hooks your leg over his shoulder and put his mouth on you.  He does not tease anymore, swiftly finding all the ways to make you moan his name.  You are scared your leg will buckle under you when he makes you come, but he holds you steady. 
Then he stands up and cups your face, kissing you deeply, making you taste yourself on his tongue.  It is a good kiss, everything a kiss should be, hot and hungry, slow and deep.  It makes you tingle with aftershocks, blinking at him with delirious pleasure when he pulls back.   
Minho can be loud, can be boisterous, can be scathing.  He can also speak gently, in such a soft, light rasp.  It makes your head spin.   He speaks like that now.    
“This is how it is,” he says, then kisses you again, licks into your mouth.  When you moan, he moans back.  “I make you sigh,” he says.  “I make your pussy wet.  I make you come.  Just me.”
“Yes,” you nod, clinging to him when he carries you to the bed.  “You, Minho.” 
He lays you down, kneeling between your open legs.  They are still quivering from your orgasm.  He looks at you, hungrily, while opening his belt.  He rips it out of his jeans and tosses it behind him, then unzips while leaning down to kiss you.  He dives past your waiting mouth to kiss your throat, biting marks under your jaw, on your neck, on your tits.  You grab his head, hands in his hair, arching your back under his desperate mouth. 
“You’re mine,” he says.  “You’ve always been mine.”
He holds your hips while thrusting inside you.  You imagine his hands leaving a permanent mark, just like that stained dress, a claiming that forever marks you as his.  He fucks you so steadily and deeply, holding you possessively, gasping your name and how good you feel while he takes you. 
“Perfect,” he says in that dreamy voice, rubbing you softly while fucking you hard. It makes you come around his cock, clenching tight, which makes him moan into your mouth.   “Mine.”
You wrap your legs around him.  You lay chest-against-chest, holding each other.  Your nails scratch his back, no doubt leaving your own marks, your whole body littered with his kisses and bites.  There is not a single inch of you that is not branded by him. 
“Yes,” you say.  “Always, Minho.”
Saying his name sends him over.  He comes inside you, claiming you even there, then stays inside you after while you kiss. 
You stay in his arms all night, making love and sleeping then making love some more.  When the sun rises, you wake to him holding you, stroking your cheek affectionately. 
He kisses your forehead and you nestle comfortably against him, happy to be home. 
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bluechronicles · 11 months ago
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sal fisher ⟢ dating headcanons
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NOTES ✦ i haven’t actually finished the game so maybe ooc sal, but i read a lot of sal x reader. i’ll finish the game after this post, lol.
PAIRING ✦ sal fisher x gender neutral!reader
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sal is the sweetest boy ever! everyone says this, but he truly is. sal fully believes communication is key, and that it’s crucial in every relationship.
he’ll never try to make you feel left out or feel outcasted or indifferent based on any features or disorders you have. he personally knows what it feels like due to his incident and prosthetic, so he tries his best. let him know by words that you appreciate his efforts greatly!
sal loves doing small things, like holding your hand. he enjoys the comfort and touch, or maybe even just getting up and getting you water. hydration is great.
all this poor boy asks for is your love after <3
i feel like sal would go into dating someone who’s already seen his face, he’s that comfortable with them. you’d probably be apart of the gang, or just a close friend of his he met during a class. and if it’s when he’s a young adult, say you were a cashier. i don’t know.
if there’s one cute aspect of sal fisher, he gets very flustered around you.
even the slightest touches still make him feel like he’s on cloud nine, making him giggle and kick his feet like a schoolgirl.
valentine’s day was almost a week ago, so let’s kick in some v-day stuff in here.
sal is a very thoughtful boyfriend, but his mind almost blanks when it comes to valentine’s day. he’s not sure at all what to do, he knows what you like, he’s not worried about that. just how’ll you’ll react. he’s thoughtful, but he overthinks.
sal decides on making a basket, filled with your favorite chocolate/candy—or your favorite snacks. a teddy bear with it holding a heart shoved in there, laced with the words “love”.
valentines day is on a good sunny wednesday, everyones holding flowers or absolutely dejected after getting rejected by their crushes. not you, though. happily standing at your locker, not even caring if sal got you something.
he’s all you need! but him showing up timidly with his small basket of things, handing it to you shyly; it made you giggle and blush, taking it and inspecting it carefully.
he would be soo happy that you like it!
now, more general stuff, sal is a great boyfriend.
maybe it’s already been established, but he’ll get you whatever you want. oh, you want those cheetos? it’s done. want that extremely overpriced water that’ll hurt sal’s wallet immediately after its purchase? he’s got it in his hands. sal would almost literally go into debt for you, he’s down bad.
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jasminerva · 1 month ago
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“does Nagumo have kinks and if so what are your favs for him 🎤”
So I was asked the above by Lao (@herringstrait)... And I thought I'd just list off a few off the top of my head, but in the end I had enough for a full post lmaooo (and then some - I added more and it just got away from me orz)
Welp... here ya go!
Nagumo x gn!Reader (w/ a few femme-gendered parts as indicated by ♀) Want more? Check out my SakaDays Masterlist! 🍑 Comments, reblogs, tags appeachiated~! 🍑
🎤🧐
mic check one-two (takes in a deep breath)
Nagumo x Reader NSFW headcanons
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I feel like Nagumo would prefer to be in control even when he "relinquishes" it lol he wants to show you who's boss (it's you - if you really want you can even make him cry and drool and beg for it) he'll (learn to) crave it 😏 like a special once in a while treat. Honestly, he convinces himself he needs control because that's secure & safe to him. When he gives you control, that's basically saying he feels super safe with you! And if that ain't the sexiest thing ever, I don't know what is.
I personally don't feel like he's got any extravagant kinks like rope play or whips or wax / pain play (he'll try everything once, and he'll do stuff that you like for you)
Now, that doesn't mean he won't go crazy if you wrap yourself up like a present with your/his favourite-coloured ribbon! Or - better yet - let him wrap you up!
Food play for sure tho. One of the smut fics I have drafted up for Valentine's Day involves chocolate in lieu of clothing lmao
Nagumo likes little challenges cuz he's childish like that - throw him a bone every once in a while. Dare him to keep the cuffs on no matter what (god knows he can break outta anything). Let him get creative in stripping you and he'll surprise you (hint: it involves teeth).
I do think he'd like it a lot if you call him "good boy" - he likes praise. Nagumo will for sure reciprocate.
I think he really likes jiggly parts lol so he'd get mesmerized and purposely slam harder and maybe slap it a bit just to see it wiggle lmao (also them slapping sounds mmmph)
Mirror sex
Orgasm control lol but not too crazy he's a soft guy (for the most part). Mostly, he's a sappy romantic and he wants to cum isshoni together with you, so he'll do his darndest to get you off at the same time. In reality, you could probably control him better than he thinks he can control you.
He can be a little possessive but it's not to possess rather than the feelings behind it. If you time it well and tell him you're "his" he could very much cum prematurely 🤣 (he just wants you to know you're his and he's yours okay???)
I also have a smut that I don't know when it'll be released but… it involves an annual hunting excursion in the wilderness lmao (where YOU are the prey - so yeah) [Lao mentioned the face he made while threatening Yotsumura so I HAD TO INCLUDE IT]
(hack-coughs)
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(takes in another breath)
Nagumo would be amazing at role play (dude is a master of disguise) but at the end of the day all he wants is to be himself / vulnerable and with you 🥹
I shared this before where Nagumo keeps his eyes open for everything lmaooo his FOMO is bad. You have to get used to when you accidentally peek while he's kissing or you're trying to cover your O face - nope, he will pry those hands off your face or lean very forward - he wants to see it ALL with them big boba eyes.
Just like his eyes are made for eyeing, his fingers are made for fingering. You can act all cocky and crack a joke about how his knuckle tattoos will wear out so much faster at the rate he's going, but he'll just tell you, "worth getting them retouched if I get to touch you like this" as he nearly sends you to heaven (showing off the real reason he has his gold assassin license).
On that note, he's not afraid to probe (literally and figuratively) you, even while you're already stuffed. "Y-Yoichi, t-too much... I don't think that'll fff—" "Shh... don't worry, baby, you can take it all."
[♀] For my womb-sisters, I can see him pressing down on your lower abdomen while he's thrusting into you, feeling you from the outside-in (inside-out?), driving you crazy. Hit that g(uaranteed good time)-spot-on accuracy.
He knows how to use his tongue too. You might even prefer it because it means he'll shut up for once, but ultimately you love his silver tongue-in-cheek as much as you love his other appendages. I think he still prefers leaving his mouth free for kisses and cracking wise.
[♀] Bonus food play, he will kill two birds with one stone by taking in some sugar-free candy or mint beforehand to eat you out. We know how much he loves his sweets after all~ ;) plus the minty tingle would keep things quite literally fresh. (warning: don't mix actual sugar with the vajayjay — not worth it)
Look up BJ blast pop rocks and tell me that won't be the best way to get back at him.
He loves it when you tangle your fingers in his hair, hold him close while he ravishes you. He keeps his hair messy for a reason (wants you stuck for as long as possible).
[♀] Just like he has the bobas, if you have the boobas, he loves to motorboat tease them and rest his face between them (even outside of R18 times). There's something about how nipples perk up that he feels real satisfied about.
[♀] Holding onto them while he's hitting that spot? The peaks between his tattooed fingers and feeling the jiggly movement under his palms? That's one of the rare times he has difficulty concentrating on your face.
Aftercare
This can be pre-/post-/in between, but he likes to trace your hip or stomach or other part with his fingers. Maybe solve some math puzzles like a nerd (scenario included below).
He'll clean you up really well. Maybe too well. Don't take up his offer to clean you up in the shower or bath if you're short on time.
I can see him as the big spoon, or even little spoon. Best would be the pillow-talk position, where he just holds you right against him, face-to-face, eye-to-boobage.
Whatever position, just picture him holding you with his fingers interlocked.
He'll tangle his legs with yours and lock you tf in. Need to go to the bathroom? Best of luck. Dude is a clingy Cancer.
He might wax poetic, saying something cheesy like "we fit together like puzzle pieces" or "you're a problem I'm still trying to solve" - feel free to bonk him. Then you'll have some mandarin oranges to share!
Nuzzles & cuddles & kisses, oh my!
He'll fall asleep with his chin resting on your head, or nuzzled against your chest. (omg Memi @toyboxterror shared this art by ivy_rt_ w/ me which is perfect)
Extra for those familiar with cloud8.
re: hunter-prey play - you don’t particularly like nature, but you’ll do it just to outlast him as long as possible (you can be stupid competitive and it reminds you of JCC times) - plus maybe you like the adrenaline spike haha. He makes a convincing predator.
re: orgasm control / rare dom time - you will get some use out of your kill heels after all (psst don’t tell Tenju).
If you’re into consensual somno - the perk is that you don’t have to do anything PLUS it makes Nagumo feel trusted and desired and that gets him off. WIN-WIN & WINK-WONK.
Nagumo may hate his stuffy work wear, but you've convinced him the necktie is a must. To tug on, motioning him to come hither, pulling him into a kiss, he'll pin you down between his arms and deepen it. It becomes ceremony after a long day's work. (thank you Memi for reminding me!!!)
Extra (forgot I had this drafted in Oct - figured I'd include it here)
SakaDays headcanon: Nagumo “I solve Sudoku puzzles in my downtime” Yoichi does rapid mental math in his head and most likely even uses his fingers (wink-wonk).
shared in the ch1 end notes of c o n t r a i l s (Nagumo x F!Reader ***nsfw smut*** fic). [tumblr post link if you wanted to like + reblog]
Probably traces Sudoku on your bare skin, too. The nerd. Here's a smol scenario of a time when you first noticed:
(You and Nagumo are snuggled up) Nagumo: (hand lingering on your hip, he starts tracing patterns on your skin) You: Are you playing tic-tac-toe or something? Nagumo: Hm? Nope. You: (after a few more movements, realizing) Seriously? Sudoku? Nagumo: Yeah, well, I left the book in my other coat, but may as well continue where I left off~ You: Wow. Is that where your mind immediately goes? Lucky me. Nagumo: (slowly moves mathematical ministrations towards your core, purring) Feeling lucky now~?
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mrmorganswoman · 8 months ago
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no grave can hold my body down, ill crawl home to her
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summary:
arthur morgan knew he was the type of man that shouldn’t risk falling in love, but jesus she just made it so hard NOT to
a/n: first fic!! inspired by work song by hozier lol. hope y’all enjoy it Xx 💗
‘Arthur Morgan, you fool’ He thought to himself, mentally swearing for catching himself staring at their camps newest member yet again. But he just couldn’t help it. He knew he shouldn’t indulge in this. It was stupid really, any attempt at love in the past had failed him. All because of this life he chose to live. One that wasn’t easy to leave behind. Though Arthur knew, if you asked him to he’d throw it all away. God this man would do anything for you, he practically worshiped the ground you walked on. He didn’t know why he was so captivated by you, maybe it was your honey sweet voice, or the kindness you showed him right from your first day of knowing him. He couldn’t stop himself from loving every little thing about you, to him you were perfect. A goddamned goddess. He thought you deserved someone better than him. A woman such as yourself deserved to live a good life, one where the law isn’t out to get you. One where people could be out to hurt you because of your husband’s line of work. You deserved to feel safe and secure in your life. Nothing like the chaos you were living through now.
Little did Arthur know, you were feeling the exact same way about him. You had deep feelings for Arthur Morgan, you were as sweet like sugar on that man. You loved everything about him, but most of all how he treated you. He made 100% sure you felt safe and were taken care of all the time. You were one of the first people he’d check up on when returning from a job. Or you mentioned something you needed and the next day he would just so happen to need to run to town and what do you know, the exact scarf, seasoning, hair ribbon, you name it would be included in his haul. And if he was around at meal times, he would not so subtly make sure you got your portion. All of this and yet, he rarely said a word to you. It confused you to no end, it felt like he cared about you deeply but he rarely paid any attention to you. You were a lost soul before you started riding with the Van Der Lindes, and because of the Blackwater situation it was hard for the gang to let in a new mouth to feed. But ever since the beginning Arthur made you feel so welcomed. You don’t know what you did do deserve his kindness but it was deeply appreciated. Mary-Beth was CONVINCED Arthur was sweet on you, so we’re Tilly, Molly, Abigail, Karen, goodness even Susan Grimahaw herself made a comment about it you once. You wanted to believe it so badly, but he didn’t talk to you!! He could just be a kind man of little words and you’re reading into the situation all wrong.
‘Oh well…’ You thought with a sigh, flicking your eyes up from the needle work you had long been neglecting because of your thinking. To your surprise, you found a pair of beautiful blue eyes already looking in your direction…
~~~~~~~
“Shit!” Arthur swore under his breath, god dammit you were still as a staute for ages before this why’d you have to look up now?? Arthur begrudgingly tore my eyes away from t and started walking to his horse- where he was supposed to be already. Hosea wanted to take him into town for some reason he had yet to say.
“Arthur!” Hosea said warmly. He then raised an eyebrow. “I hope you didn’t have any trouble getting here?”
‘Oh I this is NOT goin’ there.’ Arthur thought.
“Course not.” He said flatly. Hosea smiled a knowing smile, before long they mounted thier horses and were off.
The ride to Valentine was thankfully silent and quick. But Arthur knew that was going to change as soon as Hosea informed him that he was taking Arthur to the saloon to “Chat over a drink” With such a grin on his face that Arthur knew he was nothing short of doomed.
After getting situated at the bar with a neat whiskey and a beer, Hosea start talking to Arthur, though it felt more like he was speaking AT at him. Making little remarks about love and what it does for people. Sharing little stories of “the joys of marriage.” …..very sneaky, Hosea.
“Hosea…. Please get to whatever point it is yer tryin’ to make here.” Arthur said, cutting into his rambling.
“Arthur….” He cooed, sounding like he was talking to some schoolyard boy. “I’ve been watching you pine over (Name) for MONTHS.”
Arthur said nothing. Nothing but a silent prayer that his cheeks weren’t burning a fiery shade of red.
“I know you’re sweet on her, it’s as obvious as a wolf standing in a pack of sheep!”
Arthur ran a hand over my face and let out a tired sigh. Hosea sipped his beer, waiting for him to respond.
“What ‘m I supposed’t say?” Arthur grumbled, crossing his arms over my chest. ‘God, what a pathetic fool I am.’ Arthur thought. “Not like she’d want an ugly bastard like me ‘nyway.”
“On the contrary! Hosea chuckles. “I was walking by the women’s tent last nigh- couldn’t sleep. Wanted to walk a bit to clear my head- and my boy you should’ve heard the things (Name) was saying about you!”
At that, Arthur sat up a little straighter. “What things…?” He asked, slightly wearily. Hosea smiled.
“Son, she’s fallen for you head first! If only you’d start speaking more then 2 words a week to her! You do so much for that girl Arthur, would it be so hard to do that too?”
He didn’t say anything. Learning that, by some fucking MIRACLE- the woman of his dreams has fallen for him was making his head spin. Could this really be happening?? Could this work?? A stab of pain shot through him as he remembered Mary, and how things ended with her. But this could be different, after all you were with the gang. You didn’t care about his life, you loved him despite it all…Arthur hadn’t dared let himself think that a love with you could possibly work out. The thought made him giddy. He felt dumb as rocks, feeling so strongly for you without ever saying a damn word to you. But he couldn’t let himself get to know you- he couldn’t bare to hear your silky voice say his name more then you already do. With such kindness, such love.He wanted to talk to you, to love you, to cherish you and worship you like you deserved to be, but-
“Hosea, I’m afraid.” Arthur said quietly. “Look at ‘er, I can’t drag this woman down the path I’m on. She doesn’t deserve a man like me.”
Hosea pushed Arthur’s untouched whiskey towards him, Arthur took the glass and downed it all in one go. He listened to Hosea’a next words at the fiery liquid settled in his stomach.
“Are you going to risk making that decision for her?”
~~~~~~~
You sat on the cold ground in front of the dying out campfire, grateful that everyone had fallen into their cots for the night. You loved the solitude of nighttime. It was so nice to be by yourself, enjoying the quiet peace of the stars above you.
Before long, your thoughts (as they always did) turned to Arthur Morgan. Hosea has returned to camp hours ago, telling you that Arthur should be back shortly. It’s been hours and still no sign of him. You knew it was normal, but you couldn’t help but worry while he was out of camp. Which was stupid really, you weren’t his girl. Just because he was kind didn’t mean you had to get your knickers all on a twist over him.
‘Damn your mysterious-ness Arthur Morgan….’
You only know you dozed off when the familiar sound of a horse whining woke you up. And then an even more familiar voice soothing the distressed animal.
“Easy girl…. Y’know I can’t spend all my time with ya’ don’t you?”
You stretched your arms out and listened to the sweet interaction. Despite him being the gang’s toughest enforcer, a wanted dead or alive outlaw, Arthur truly was a sweetheart. He treated all the women of the camp with the utmost respect and was such a help to any soul in need of. If only he knew how badly you needed him.
You from your spot on the ground, drawing the outlaws attention. He approached with a small smile.
“Glad it was jus’ you..” Arthur said, hoping he didn’t sound as nervous as he felt. You on the other hand were absolutely over the MOON at the fact that Arthur had finally decided to talk to you.
“Oh I hope you’re not too disappointed Mr. Morgan!” You said with a light chuckle. Arthur, not sensing your sarcasm through his nerves, panicked.
“N-no! Not at all, ma’am! I apologize if I came off that way-”
“I’m just teasing ya’ Arthur. It’s quite alright.” You said and smiled. A smile so sweet and bright Arthur could’ve melted on the spot. Your sweet smile, the way his name rolled off your lips. Arthur wasn’t a religious man, but he might as well have been in heaven.
“(Name)….” Arthur said, his sweet southern drawl when he said your name making you blush. “I’d like to apologize. For how I’ve been treatin’ you.”
“Oh Arthur! You’ve been nothin’ but kind to me since I’ve been here- whatever are you sorry for?” You asked him, genuinely shocked at the man’s statement. Were you talking to the same Arthur who took care of your horse for you, bought you ribbons to put in your hair, and watched over you like a protective hawk? Sure he didn’t speak to you much, but you knew he was a man of few words. Even if it hurt sometimes, could live with it. You didn’t need him to love you back for you to love him all the same. You’d almost accepted it. Almost.
Arthur sighed a deep and nervous sigh, his thoughts blurring and the several whiskeys he had in him were NOT helping. Not a bit.
“You see- well it’s, it’s just-” Arthur stammered- god he was making a complete FOOL of himself!
You stepped closer to Arthur, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. You looked up at him nervously. The two of you had never been close as this. Arthur looked down at you, you had concern laced in your eyes. Concern for him. Your long hair was falling out of its messy braid, the loose strands framing your face beautifully. He could see the nights starts reflected in your eyes.
‘How beautiful..’ Arthur thought. He was completely captivated by you. ‘How could a woman like this be allowed to roam the same earth as someone like me..?’
Without even realizing what he was doing, Arthur pulled you flush against his chest, one arm wrapping around your waist and the other reaching up to cup your chin. His touch was feather light as he stroked his thumb over your face.
“I ain’t never felt like this before Miss…” Arthur mumbled, leaning his forehead down to touch your. He didn’t have time to wonder (or thank) whatever divine force gave him to courage to do this. “You got me makin’ a fool outta myself…”
You let out a soft gasp at the a sudden touch from Arthur. You had only ever been like this in your sweetest dreams, was this really happening??
“Arthur…?” You whispered, questioning him. “Wha…What ‘re you d-”
That’s it. He couldn’t take it anymore. To hell with the risks, the past to hell with it all! He had come to love you more than life itself. You were exactly what he needed in his painful and cruel life.
You were such a loving soul, treating everyone and everything around you so kindly it was heartwarming. You give and give and GIVE to everyone around you. You never judged anyone around you for their actions- past or present. You picked up chores from the other women when they needed a break. You sung little Jack to sleep when Abigail was too exhausted to lift her head from her cot. You put braided flowers into your beautiful long hair whenever you had a moment to yourself. You smiled at him every morning when you left your tent to begin your day. You always kept the pink silk scarf he picked up for you and left in your tent with a note in the pocket of your skirt. You picked at nails and hummed when you were nervous. You loved staying up late, gazing at the stars and admiring the universe. He had pages upon pages of you doing exactly that sketched in his journal.
You were heaven sent. You were perfect. The world didn’t fucking deserve you.
Arthur slammed his lips down onto yours without wasting another moment. And he shuddered at the feelings of your lips finally being against his own. You kissed him back just has hard, standing on your tip toes to wrap your arms around his broad shoulders. You felt his tongue slide against his bottom lip, and wasted not a moment opening your mouth to let him in.
Months of longing, tension, were fought out as your tongues pushed against each other. Of course Arthur won, you could barely contain the moan that was building in the back of your throat when you felt his tongue exploring your mouth like a starving man. If he hadn’t been holding you so tightly, you would’ve fallen over. The sheer want and desperation of the kiss made your knees go completely weak.
Unfortunately, you both needed air and had to pull away. Arthur rested his forehead against your own. The both of you stood there, panting with closed eyes. Neither wanting the moment to end.
When you eventually opened your eyes, you looked up at Arthur. And couldn’t help the giddy smile that spread across your face. Arthur wrapped both of his strong arms around your waist, and he smiled sweetly back at you. You both stood there for a moment, swaying gently back and forth as you embraced each other. The silence that fell between you both was comfortable and welcome as you gazed into each others eyes, both sharing the same look of love and adoration.
Arthur was the one who finally broke the silence between the two of you, and you will never forget his next words.
“Please darlin’” He whispered. “I’m beggin’ you… I want you to be my girl. I’m sorry I was a fool for such a long time-”
You leaned up on your tip toes and silenced him with a gentle kiss.
“I wouldn’t have you any other way, Mr. Morgan.”
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