#help me docdust

[muriel-not-the-dim-one]

I’ve read this over and over. Mr. Fell and Mr. Crowley were very, very careful for 6,000 years.

This is making me think harder than I ever have since I’ve been on earth. 🌍😳

@docdust , you’re so clever (and not stupid) what do you think of this???

@funnyoldworld-isnt-it I think you’ve sent me down a rabbit hole.

There are so many posts about the weirdness around Nina and Maggie, but the thing that has always bothered me the most is that both of them know Aziraphale but neither one of them seems to know Crowley. Like, at ALL. Not even by sight. Which doesn’t make any sense. For the last four years, Crowley has basically been unemployed and homeless (this sentence made me so sad to type). He has had literally NOTHING to do except hang out at Aziraphale’s bookshop. And the vibe at the beginning of s2 is that he’s there a LOT. Like, multiple times per week (“we both get plenty of use out of it, don’t we”). When Aziraphale calls him in the first episode, he says “2 minutes” the way you tell your spouse how long until you’re home from the grocery store, especially if you were on your way home already.

The dialogue goes to great lengths to highlight that Nina and Maggie SHOULD know Crowley, which just heightens the weirdness of it. When they're at the pub, Crowley asks Aziraphale, “What’s wrong with the cafe?” (implying they usually go to the cafe), but Aziraphale made a point of introducing Crowley to Nina in the first episode. And Nina makes a point of saying to Maggie that she always remembers “the regulars," but she doesn't seem to remember Crowley. Of course, she immediately notices both Jim and Muriel outside the bookshop, so she's clearly paying attention to what's happening in the neighborhood and it seems like she couldn't have failed to spot him coming and going all the time.

And Maggie's situation is even weirder. Her whole back story is that she basically grew up IN the bookshop because her grandmother’s record store was essentially in a corner of the bookshop. And yet, when Maggie and Nina see Crowley on the street right before the lightning strike, Nina says, “Do you see that bloke? Six shots of espresso and he's smoking,” and Maggie responds, “I think that man was just struck by lightning.” Which is something you say about someone you’ve never laid eyes on before. She didn’t say, “Oh, that’s Mr. Fell’s friend,” or “I’ve seen him around. He stops by Mr. Fell’s shop a lot.” And then when he comes back, "It's him. The one who was just struck by lightning. The six shots of espresso." Again, no flash of recognition of anything before the current day. This happens immediately after she's just told Nina about knowing Aziraphale since she was little. It’s just weird. Why build a back story that would put her in extremely close proximity to Crowley LITERALLY her entire life and then write dialogue that makes it clear she's never laid eyes on him before?

You could maybe think, well they're just so used to having to hide...but then I asked myself: Does it make sense that the day that you find out there is an extremely dangerous, existence-threatening problem hiding out in your ineffable husband's bookshop is also the day that you would decide to STOP keeping a low profile and start wandering the streets with abandon, introducing yourself to all the local shopkeepers, and ferrying large plants into and out of said bookshop? No. No, it does not.

In any other show, you could assume that the writers just didn’t think about it very carefully. But, given the layers and layers of meaning and symbolism baked into every detail of this show, from the dialogue, to the costuming, the set design, lighting, blocking, etc., and the way that the story folds back on itself again and again, it just feels significant.

[amagnificentobsession]

It’s Saturday morning my beloveds. Today I need your help.

After an exhausting visit to the ER last night, long, story that sucks *still giggling* I think I’m punch drunk. https://www.tumblr.com/amagnificentobsession/745732116032176128/what-is-your-opinion-on-vacuum-cleaners

My brunch skills would be sorely put to test. I don’t want to serve sub-par food.

Today I would love for you to help me. Bring your favorite dish to share with others. @god-wednesday always brings the best desserts. Anything you wish to bring, that way we can find out what others love to eat, and I can incorporate it into brunch in the future.

Oh and bring me a recipe card if you want me to make your dish for a future brunch.

It also appears @baby-angelo has conjured up a fairy nerf. Bring your own nerf gunz and balls, you know, ammo balls. Oh never mind……..

Costumes are highly encouraged.

I can already tell it’s going to be one of those days.

By the way if anyone has a vacuum they can lend me……

@docdust @i-dream-of-sheeny @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me @angelo-rib-shack @e-w-w-morningstar @god-in-the-basement @one-coming-is-enough @sliceocheese @angelo-chuck-wagon @angel-and-the-serpent @curlish @andagon @angelo-rib-shack @mr-crawleigh @muriel-not-the-dim-one @pissylittlebirdboy @trans-darbie @gandalf-big-oos @kleenexwoman @youroneandonlysnakelady @thedemon-crowley @thatflatfrog @vixie-the-vee @violet-yimlat @avis-morningstar @thedemon-crowley @muriel-not-the-dim-one

@the-metatron @dream-of-pain Madam ♥️

@andagon I’m going to put some music on to stay awake, after this please do your beautiful DJ thing.

@angelo-rib-shack darling, please check the invitations for me. 💋 I love you honey.

[bildaddyanduziraphale-aremarried]

Whilst I'm going to be drunk dancing on a table at the wedding to out wedding all the rest.

But I am notorious for annoying @the-metatron and I think I would be able to help with security at bil-daddy and mrazfellco's wedding.

I LIKE you! @helphowdoiusethis I think you should be Assistant to the Assistant Security Director for the wedding. I’d make you Security Director but we can’t have you drunk dancing on the table just in case @the-metatron does show up.

@bil-daddy @docdust @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me @mrazfellco

[andagon]

Reboot

Fragments of memory:

Gif by @goodsirs

Those … amoebas .. in … my … brain

AAAAAAAAAAH!

Seing things, I dunno …

What the fuck is going on? @lower-management

@fishyfiles am I dying?

🐟

@trans-darbie: Welcome to my world, @andagon I’m dizzy all the time … If you survive this, come to my place. I can tell fortunes.

🐟

fishyfiles: Woah woah woah @andagon you have brain amoebas. Do you know how to remove them from your corporeal form?

🐟🐟

Me: I have no idea. Mereka memakan saya, mereka memakan saya. Apa yang baru saja saya katakan?

GIF by sensorykitty

brain b b bouil bouiilab……

🐟🐟

fishyfiles: SHIT. Come here then. Or I’ll come to you.

I’m coming to you.

@lower-management: I'm coming too. Thoze things spread for all I know, and there'z no cure. Tho I know nothing about @andagon 's univerze, pleaze tell me they're pseudo-immortal like uz.

🐟🐟

me: I’m in this üniverse now. And ever since @docdust made @anauntie and I into separate beings again, I guess I’m a dämon like ….. aaaah … aaaaah …

GIF von echos-scomplink

I am a dämon? I äm a dämon? äääää

@lower-management: Uff, thiz corporation of yourz is not zurving this. I’m pretty sure of it. Are ya in pain?

🐟

Me:

GIF von daxnorman

🐟

@lower-management: Uh, not zure if painkillerz are gonna be effective. I uze ‘em regularly zo I got a handful on me but I can’t tell if they’ll help or make it worze- *they hold out a pill*

🐟

Me:

GIF von my-pervasiz

Where?

Where am I? What time?

Yes, the pill …. pleeeeece please

🐟

@lower-management: You're on earth *they put the pill in their hand* hope thiz at leazt makes it painlezs-

🐟

Memory reboot incomplete

Memory reboot incomplete

Memory reboot incomplete

...

[angelo-chuck-wagon]

'Mornin' boss. I ain't had the best couple days, that's fir sure... but I think comin' to work an gettin' my hands dirty might help distract me from my thoughts.

@docdust

[muriel-not-the-dim-one]

Greetings and salutations, how art thee?

I have a question, if I may; Do you know why I'm being followed by @the-archangel-squad and @the-metatron???

I'm a minor (and occult) diety from a completely different religion. Why should they take interest in me? If you have any idea I would love to hear back.

Thankyou for your time, Aries/Ari - Child of Pluto, and official G.I.T

‘Ello, ello, ello!

Greetings to you as well Ari. I am doing very well down here on earth! It’s a wonderful place, isn’t it?

I cannot say why @the-archangel-squad and @the-metatron is following you. Do you happen to know any of them? I know them and I don’t like them. The only one that I talk to is Mr. Fell, um I mean, Supreme Archangel Aziraphale. He is my direct supervisor. I’m a 37th class Scrivener and Heavens Ambassador to Earth.

I just recently met @murrmielmur and they are training to become an angel. I know they very much like @archangelcrowliel and they work for or take care of Sandalphon. I don’t like Sandalphon. He’s spooky!

I haven’t seen or talked to The Metatron since he left earth. I don’t like him either. He called me dim. I’m not dim. Mr Fell trusts me to make smart decisions about his bookshop.

Mr. Crowley doesn’t think I’m dim either. I know since Mr. Fell has been gone, Mr. Crowley has stayed close by, in case I need help. I can feel him, just like I can feel all angels when they are near. (Don’t tell Mr. Crowley I called him an angel, but he wasn’t always a demon and I can feel his goodness.)

I do know @amagnificentobsession she is @the-metatron wife. “It’s a long complicated story between those two” at least that’s what she tells me when we talk at brunch. Maybe you can come to brunch one day with me and meet her. She’s nothing like her husband. (She’s actually in love with Nanny Ashtoreth @dream-of-pain )

I had to look up minor because I wasn’t sure if you were someone looking for precious items in the ground (miner) or someone not considered an adult (minor). It’s always wonderful to use my dictionaries!

I’m not a minor (I’m hundreds or thousands of years old, I’m really not sure) and I’m not occult. I’m ethereal. Mr. Fell says angels are ethereal.

I’m sorry I couldn’t be more help, but perhaps Murrmiel can help or even Archangel Crowliel.

@docdust is also a huge help to me when I can’t figure something out. They are a snake oil salesman, whatever that is.

Good luck in your search @aries-is-a-god

@secretdiaryofcrowley

@aziraphalesdiaries

Muriel - Scrivener/Ambassador to Earth

[amagnificentobsession]

Good morning my Lovelies,

@docdust surprised me early with a visit, perhaps to help with some new recipes for brunch?

@dream-of-pain is having some tea, allowing me a beautiful view while I cook. (If anything burns, I’m sorry in advance) 🔥

@neo-of-sporin @furfurs-fotos @gandalf-big-oos @avis-morningstar @violet-yimlat @thedemon-crowley @youroneandonlysnakelady @kleenexwoman @pissylittlebirdboy @angel-and-the-serpent @god-wednesday @e-w-w-morningstar @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me @trans-darbie @muriel-not-the-dim-one @i-dream-of-sheeny @lucifer-and-the-guys @duchess-shax @sliceocheese @thatflatfrog @one-coming-is-enough @god-in-the-basement @curlish @andagon @ellietheduck

@angelo-chuck-wagon (I know you’re out of town my love) @angelo-rib-shack @mr-crawleigh

@the-metatron (Metatrogers)

Angelo, please help your Momma with anyone I’ve forgotten.

Also, if anyone would like to invite others, PLEASE do.

@andagon music, please? 🎶

[bildaddyanduziraphale-aremarried]

Can I join and be part of your wedding. Either as a guest or anything else?

Absolutely! What would you like to help us with? We need security to be sure @the-metatron doesn’t get into the wedding.

You can be part of the catering team, or if you love kids (both kinds) @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me could always use help with getting them ready to be in the wedding. Loretta, kid wranglers, is this a thing?

If that doesn’t work for you, let us know in what avenue you would like to assist.

@bil-daddy @docdust @amagnificentobsession

[muriel-not-the-dim-one]

Amag, @amagnificentobsession

I wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed being with everyone at brunches, the fireworks and everyone I met. @docdust , @i-dream-of-sheeny , @angelo-rib-shack @e-w-w-morningstar @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me @trans-darbie @baby-angelo @dream-of-pain please let everyone know I will miss them.

It’s been so wonderful being on earth, helping with the bookshop. I love it and I’m going to miss it so much.

But I think it will be easier on Mr. Crowley if someone else is taking care of the bookshop. I’ve heard Maggie say sometimes the memories hurt more than the actual act. @secretdiaryofcrowley

I’ve hidden Mr. Fells diaries again, so that they stay secret. @aziraphalesdiaries

I will try to visit before I leave.

*Muriel heads out the door with her notes for her Wickber Street friends*

[ineffablemossy]

Wedding album inspo for @bildaddy-and-mrazfellcos-wedding

We should definitely put one of these together after the big day, who's with me?

We could have photos, art, gifs, home made potato memes, fics, poetry, the rings & cake & the vows of course! Could make a running list of contributors.

@docdust @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me @shutanic-temple-orphanage (help I can't think of other folk to tag rn)

destiel wedding attendees raise your hand 🙋🏻

[amagnificentobsession]

Good Morning My Lovelies………..

As usual, my home is open, the food and drink is flowing. I have missed you, but my pantry is as full as my heart 😁!

Trying a little different menu today. We have Pho in an assortment (vegan included)

Stir Fry…….also as you desire. Spicy 🌶️ or not as such.

Sushi……..in any style.

Bring the children. There is plenty for them to get into a bit of mischief. And what is a childhood without a bit of fun? (Plus I need help planting more wisteria seeds) ♥️

My home is your home my familia. ✨

Angelo, my darling. Would you please add everyone your Mother has forgotten? (I probably shouldn’t start drinking when I start cooking) 😘

@docdust @i-dream-of-sheeny @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me @angelo-rib-shack @e-w-w-morningstar @god-wednesday @god-in-the-basement @one-coming-is-enough @sliceocheese @angelo-chuck-wagon @angel-and-the-serpent @curlish @andagon

@trans-darbie @baby-angelo

@the-metatron it’s been awhile husband. (And it appears you need to get control of your big breasted Gandalf) @gandalf-big-oos

@dream-of-pain Madam, as always ♥️

@muriel-not-the-dim-one, hello dear. You seemed to have a lovely time at the temple garden party. I’m not sure if you imbibe but you are welcome.

@duchess-shax @furfurs-fotos I would love to see the Furfur babies. 👶🏻 If you cannot make it, perhaps D’arbie can bring them?

[amagnificentobsession]

@curlish, I know you’ve been “working” out some problems. I’m sorry I didn’t check on you sooner, but I wanted to give you some time. Time’s up. I need your help.

I found this……..Um, person wandering about and thought how lovely she might look in Nanny’s cottage. A bit of hair dye, some different clothes (we have plenty of tank tops).

So I coerced, dragged, suggested she come with me. She seemed quite willing when I told her of ox ribs and wine, lots of good food. She’s quite a tiny creature.

Sassy too! After I got her fed and a warm bath, she slowly seemed to trust me and told me of a horrific situation she’s been going through.

It appears this child has been held against her will by @the-metatron She said he makes her sing and dance for him to exhaustion. Just before I put her to bed (alone, I would never 😳) she was whispering of a wedding between two star-crossed lovers. @curlish I don’t think she meant Romeo and Juliet.

@bil-daddy is so busy with wedding plans, miracles of ox robs, slutting about spending quality time with his fiancee @mrazfellco , @docdust is bombarded with wedding invitation requests, Loretta has all the children to care for, and Nanny has told Loretta and me to “trust” her interactions with the demons. (Somethings 🆙 in the down it seems).

I’ll be at the gingers house, working on the gazebo and making sure they are protected. Bart, I could really use your help.

[amagnificentobsession]

I fell asleep in a dream that we once shared

I looked around, and I saw that you weren't there

I thought I'd need you when it all broke down

It'll be alright when you come around

I tried to love you, just couldn't break through

No getting used to living without you

'Cause I've been waiting, don't wanna waste it

We're all alone now, how far will we take it?

Being in your arms is what I came here for

I'll close my eyes if you close the door

I felt the fire but couldn't see the flames

You didn't say it, but I know that you fеlt the same

I tried to lovе you, just couldn't break through

No getting used to living without you

'Cause I've been waiting, don't wanna waste it

We're all alone now, how far will we take it?

I tried to save you, just couldn't break through

No getting used to living without you

'Cause I've been waiting, don't wanna face it

We're all alone now, how far will we take it?

I tried to love you, just couldn't break through

No getting used to living without you

'Cause I've been waiting, don't wanna waste it

We're all alone now, how far will we take it?

@the-metatron come back, now, with me.

@angelo-rib-shack @e-w-w-morningstar I’m probably going to need your help.

@docdust @i-dream-of-sheeny @dream-of-pain

Operation: Bottomless Brunch is a GO!

@violet-yimlat I know you hate him, but I know you like me. PLEASE for the love of all that is holy and unholy don’t make me live with Metatrogers anymore! He doesn’t even allow alcohol in the house. I’m becoming a closet drinker! I’m losing my mind! LOOK AT ME!!!

[loretta-dont-you-oppress-me]

It's been over 4 months now since @bil-daddy gave me a new family after my old friend @docdust , who knew of my despair and loneliness, asked @the-almighty-god for help. God had said it was perfectly fine that I wanted to become a woman. In reality, maybe I had always been one. Bildaddy not only took me into his family, he also founded the @shutanic-temple-orphanage and appointed me as its superior.

I want to thank all of you for your love and friendship: @bil-daddy @sitisonmyface @blameless-job @ennonymous-twink @docdust @amagnificentobsession and @uziraphale.

To give something back, I have organised the @shutanic-temple-art-gallery . Please come and visit it. It is open every day.

Enjoy your Shutanic Sunday!

All hail @bil-daddy and the @shutanictemple

Glory be, praise be

Loretta

Elective Affinities

Let me humbly announce that I have now found a new place of action and affection. Family is where you feel you belong.

Thank you for being family, @blameless-job @ennonymous-twink @bil-daddy @sitisonmyface (unfortunately not in the picture)

[bildaddyanduziraphale-aremarried]

hi guys, congrats on your engagement!!! I was wondering if i could please attend your wedding or help with anything you needed sorting out? (:

Hi there @robinneedscoffee we currently don’t have anyone providing coffee/tea at the reception. We have several Jesus’s so I’m pretty sure the wine is covered.

Would you be interested in being our barista?

@docdust @bil-daddy @loretta-dont-you-oppress-me

[amagnificentobsession]

@docdust because Weddings are such a big undertaking, and I need this to be absolutely perfect for @bil-daddy and @mrazfellco (we know he’ll say yes when asked ♥️)…………..

As long as I have known all of you, your sexual innuendos playful banter, 3 ways friendship, slutty comments , social commentary and love of the Unholy Shutanic Temple is a thing of beauty!

After an evening of reflection, I’ve come to ask you if you will be my, group of the 2 of us, my second in command to make this the wedding of Eternity. I would LOVE for you to help me. ♥️😘

Update on Proposing to Aziraphale

Shhh don't tell @mrazfellco, it's still a secret. Thanks for not telling him, @theangelyouknew

So, the results of the Ring Poll are in!

The winner was Ring A, with a little under half of the vote. Blue box, silver snake, obsidian eyes.

Ring C was a close second. Black box, silver snake, ruby eyes.

@ar1mas and @vankaar noticed the ouroboros symbolism of the third ring.

@iamyourdensityy was astonished it didn't win.

@kiralena also voiced support for Ring C

@onlylurkingreadingstuff suggested putting Ring C in Ring A's box.

Which I did consider

along with a yellow-eyed option, suggested by @adriennelikesstuff

as well as yellow eyed option for the original Ring A

as @quicksilvyr5 and @ineffablecollision suggested.

There wasn't as much love for Ring B, which I admit was the gaudier choice. But as @vammppyre and @amagnificentobsession pointed out, it was also the only gold option and Aziraphale is a gold girlie.

So I realized I had some more work to do on finding @mrazfellco the perfect ring. My angel has particular tastes and he deserves only the best. Might even have to make one for him myself.

Stay tuned everyone.

Luckily, I've already got two bridesmaids (gn) lined up, @phoen1xr0se, who volunteered

and @ineffablegays13 who called me and @mrazfellco a cute couple, so I'm volunteering him.

@one-coming-is-enough is going to release doves at the wedding (if @mrazfellco says yes)

(if I missed anyone from the replies or reblogs, it was unintentional, not ignoring you)