#hehe more softness with these guys!!!!
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smth smth aventurine talking about ipc members to dr ratio
#hsr#honkai star rail#honkai headcanons#honkai sr#honkai aventurine#honkai dr ratio#hsr dr ratio#hsr aventurine#aventio#or whatever ship name is?#idk while i doubt aventurine is close with any members i doubt he’d hate them#he’s like. ‘they’re idiots but my idiots’#but like. dr ratio would kinda get it even if he claims he can’t ‘stand’ to look at idiots (he wants to help others better their knowledge)#smth smth both of these guys have a soft spot for their co workers#i think dr ratio would hold a softer spot for his coworkers he just hides it more w/ his assholery#whereas aventurine acts nicer but isn’t as close imo#aventurine is outwardly ‘kinder’ bc he’s more approachable but inwardly mean to me whereas ratio is outwardly mean but inwardly nice#idk!! i just love parallels tbh <3 those r my favorites hehe
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Here’s what you’re gonna do.
You’re gonna curl up in your bed like a cute little kitty.
You’re gonna get all cozy and snuggly under the blankets.
Put on some rain sounds or maybe a fire crackling.
Shut the blinds, turn off the lights, all that jazz. And let yourself relax.
Get some well deserved rest. *pats your head and gives smol forehead smooch*
you are so sweet to me….. this is so niceys of you. sniffles a lil bit 😿
you know what, just for you, i will play some nice rain sounds and get cozy. just for you being all sweet to me. i can’t promise i can actually fall asleep still yet but i will try my absolute best for you nonny
if i could curl up on your lap and purr to kingdom come i would do it in an instant
#i am so soft about this i am not okay#it’s so special and dear to me when people treat me more cat than human yk?#<- the nonhumanisms are definitely showing but yk#i’m just a guy!#hehe thank you for bein all sweet#it goes a long way lovely#ender.txt#askbox#💤🌧️ anon#smiles so wide i could die
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Some possible* Tala stickers :D (Patreon)
#My art#Original#Tala#*I'm more just playing around with the idea of making some - personal stickers!#I mean I'm the biggest Tala fan anyway it's fine if it's for an audience of one lol#I finally got my hands on some sticker paper a bit back now it's just a matter of getting them the size I want and finding a good printer!#Ours is uh....well just don't look too closely at some of the greyscale pages I've posted they leave a bit to be desired lol#And that's just black and white I'm a little concerned what it'd do to pictures! :'D#Though I say that but it did print the art from Roundabout quite nicely so hmm! Maybe! But I do have other avenues if I want them :)#It's nice to have options!#For the time being they're just cute little guys of one of my cute little guys! :D In her doggy form and specifically her plush puppy form ♪#I really have been enjoying adding to her physical accessories haha - she's always got her little gold stitch/scar#And then her first accessory being the bracelet - and then her face mask - and now her ribbon! :D It's all very cute she's very cute#She's also good feral practice since I'm still not very good at drawing dogs or cats or the like :'D#I used references for that first one! Wowie!#I'm a fan of how she turned out overall :) I can still see some work I'd like to improve for her back legs but other than that :D#Baring her little teefsies hehe she's so scary ♥#My love of drawing plushies rears its head again - she is added to the list! No soft shading or lighting like MewTwo tho that's alright#The stitches are the really important part :) I like them!#I wish she could sit like that irl haha she's actually very stable to stand! A little awkward to sit#And finally a cutesy cartoony one :D She doesn't have paw beans irl either but come on I had to!#I debated whether they'd be pink or brown but I think I'm happiest keeping her palette simple :)#She's so cute <3
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I've been seeing lots of takes lately with people feeling hatred towards part 2 Speedwagon for being a greedy capitalist who probably exploited people and done some shady stuff to become wealthy because there was '''no way he could have become rich just from oil money'''... thoughts?
it's so disappointing to see some bad takes about the Speedwagon Foundation being some "acshually nasty organization" and about Speedwagon supposedly becoming some heartless rich man popping up again. And like, I shouldn't even be surprised at this point considering how the average "Jojo fan" mistreats Part 1 and 2 and alllll the misinformation they love to spread about them and about some characters in particular, often bastardizing them into wildly out of character versions and pretending those fanons are canon for whatever reason (being Speedwagon one of the characters that gets bastardized like that the most), sometimes just to make Blorbo Of Their Choice look better by throwing every other character under the bus, sometimes just because people can't be bothered to pay attention to the og if there are no punching ghosts on sight (and even then, Jojo parts featuring stands get misinterpreted a lot too).
This is gonna be long, so let me start by saying that if y'all really believe that Speedwagon somehow became some nasty ass rich man, then you're completely misinformed and you (and I say "you" in general and not specifically you anon) might benefit from rereading/rewatching the source material and actually paying attention to the plot and details this time.
Like, I've seen people assuming that the Foundation only researched the stone mask and eventually stand stuff, and completely forgetting that one of the literal main goals and also one of the biggest things the Foundation does is seeking for the betterment of the planet as a whole (preserving nature, wildlife, etc) as well as for the betterment of medicine and health care, actually seeking for the best for all humankind, this in addition to all the secret branches it has for the research of supernatural phenomena like stands, stone masks, pillar men, and so on in order to prevent as many incidents with them as possible and prevent the loss of as innocent lives as possible.
Sure, the people working for those latter branches might get into deep trouble sometimes whenever some jerk with a stone mask or a stand starts some shit, but, another thing jojo fans tend to conveniently forget is that those employees are working for the secret/non-public branches of the Foundation. We as audience know about them because we are let into seeing them working as part of the narrative, however, the public in general within the story DO NOT KNOW about the existence of those branches or what they do. Pillar men, stone masks, stands and the research around them are kept in secret in order to prevent any sorts of chaos and ensuing panic, among other safety reasons.
The people working for those branches are specialized or at least have some prior knowledge on those fields they work in (you'd think it is a MUST considering they are being let in on sensitive information that could be super detrimental for the planet and for humankind if it fell in the wrong hands), meaning that those employees already know and are fully aware of the kind of stuff they're going to deal with there from the start. They weren't deceived into it, and the fact that the employees remain loyal to Speedwagon from start to end and respect and follow his will, even long after his death, denotes that there was some deep and mutual respect and appreciation there, something you can't earn through exploitation, and definitely something these people wouldn't have done had Speedwagon been the heartless tyrant rich old man some people with a lack of media literacy want to believe and make others believe he was.
If people paid just a wee bit more attention to earlier Jojo parts, they would have realized it was all spelled out from the beginning too! Speedwagon expressly states from the very start his disgust and hatred towards the rich, being the Joestars the only exception to that due to them being genuinely kind persons, unlike most other wealthy people out there. He was also implied to have been dirt poor for most of his life and was also stated to have lived in the slums at least up to PB's main timeline. There were never any indications or signs that showed that he ever betrayed those roots of his by siding with the rich against the poor over the years. Instead, he's been using his funds to make the whole world a better place for everyone, not only by improving health care and access for all people as well as the environment (which would actually show a sense of duty from him as he is counteracting whatever negative impact his oil company may have had on the planet), but also providing all the aid he can against supernatural threats.
And not just that, but he's also kept some of his connections with the crime world over the years. However, rather than using those connections for selfish goals, he makes use of them to workaround the system in cases like Lisa Lisa's, where he used all those influences he had to help her go successfully into hiding after killing the zombie that murdered George (an undercover zombie that was actually a higher up within the army and who everyone believed to be a regular human, hence their chasing after her to make her pay for that "crime" she had supposedly committed). Additionally, if you know anything about big companies and organizations, you'll know that the law is also not always there to protect regular people, and sometimes, it will cater to the more profitable goals, as well as some businessmen actively being shady af and "hindering" their rivals for their own benefit. The Speedwagon Foundation being an organization that vouches and actively works for the wellbeing of people would have probably ruffled countless feathers among those who seek for a personal gain, to say the least (think of the hijackers that tried to kidnap him, as shown in the flashback in BT, i.e). This is also where those connections he keeps with criminals come into play, as there are never any mentions about Speedwagon doing shady stuff through them nor using them to pursue some personal goal, which hints at the fact that he keeps and uses those nexus as means of protection against actual enemies. Defense rather than offense, if you will.
Also, lets not forget that Speedwagon found his reason to change his ways when he met Jonathan, and that a lot of the things the Foundation does are things Jonathan himself would have gone into had he not passed away (the archaeological research, the deep studying of the stone mask -which eventually led to the discovery of the pillar men just in time before their awakening-, all in order to prevent more incidents like the whole thing with Dio from happening, and so on). It's downright silly to think Speedwagon would even think of betraying Jonathan and his memory by using not only the second chance he received from Jojo himself, but also using the literal monument Speedwagon built to honor the deep bond and mutual affection the two had back when Jonathan was alive for some selfish goal.
And also, lets not forget how disgusted he was with Dio and every single vile thing he did to everyone. Do you really think he would want to follow a path similar to his, in which people are just another step for him to walk all over?? If so, then you sure are completely wrong about who Speedwagon really is like.
Those "he became some nasty capitalist lol", pretending that Spw became some heartless and selfish wealthy man along the way for no reason, all despite the heaps of constant evidence the canon has presented, even long after Speedwagon's passing away in the story, that shows that that was never the case only go to show that people are lazy and that paying attention to the story and the details in it is just something some Jojo fans will actively refuse to do and then will make the worst bullshit takes up about it.
Also?? People do realize that it's possible to become rich and not be some piece of shit?? Like, sure, I do agree that most wealthy people irl ARE shit and scummy af, but there will always be a few exceptions, you just don't always see them because the real kind ones don't go around telling everyone about every single kind act they do, they just put their money to good use to make their own employees lives better, or invest/donate money every chance they get to some organization of their trust and so on. Adding to this, do you all even realize people can't just throw money out of the window and that as a business person you always need to keep some capital to actually make your business thrive and so you can continue helping other people out in this case where BIG SUMS of money are being put to use in favor of actual civilians and people from all walks of life??
((Edit to add yet another Very Obvious display that Speedwagon never sided with the rich, not even in his older years: Smokey Brown! The kid is literally a mirror of Speedwagon’s own younger self in that both were criminals from the streets in a large city (London in Spw’s case, NY in Smokey’s), immersed in crime and poverty and most likely having to resort to crime as a mean to survive in a society that was even more classist (and also racist, and this can actually be seen in BT when one of the mafiosos starts spewing shit towards Smokey due to his skin color) than it is nowadays, both having no known parents or family either and having been most likely orphaned/abandoned. Had Speedwagon been this nasty ass rich man, he could have simply ignored Smokey or treated him poorly, or could have even turned him to authorities, considering Smokey’s criminal record just for the sake of “preventing him from stealing from him” or whatever. There was literally nothing Spw could benefit himself from by keeping Smokey around like he did, which is a core trait in abusive/exploitative people. However, he never did any of that. Instead, and despite the reigning classism and racism at the time, Speedwagon along with Erina always embraced Smokey from the start and basically became his godparents, never letting the kid go back to his life in the streets, providing him with everything he needed and making sure he received a proper education, which was something very few people of color (black people, specially) could receive. And yet, Speedwagon and Erina made it happen, very likely using some of Spw’s influences to allow Smokey go to the school (and eventually college too) of his choice without any stigma or trouble at all and covering all expenses for him. -end of edit-))
If this was, idk, the Metal Gear series or some other media that revolves around the topic of politics, then the whole "cRaPiTaLisM!!! >:O" thing would have some weight and be plausible as it directly impacts the main plot of the story. But here?? In Jojo's?? Where the main focus as stated by it's author himself is the strength of the human spirit overcoming obstacles in the face of actual evil??? Try harder.
And, before I get That One Type of fans yelling at me that "people don't just get rich without exploiting people in real life!!"… do you guys realize we're talking about animanga series where vampires, funky stone masks with spooky powers, pillar men, stands, people who can use some ancient sunpowered martial art, plankton that can turn into a sentient person, and so on can happen, right? And yet I don't see anyone whining that "tHaT DoEsN'T hApPeN iRl!!".
And like, if this whole claim stems from disliking Speedwagon, just say you don't like him and move the fuck on. You don't need to try to justify your disliking for him or for ANY other characters, let alone making up wildly out of character bullshit about them to try to prove to yourself and to everyone else why according to you the character is "bad". I promise you it is not a big deal to simply not vibe with a character.
#the lack of media literacy among some jojo fans is overwhelming i swear#its sad to see people constantly and completely misreading and bastardizing speedwagon into something he's not#like all those LAME takes about him being some soft pure uwu innocent scaredy bby#or the 'topkek reddit funni meemz XD!' abt him that some ppl lazily/unironically take as canon#or these silly and also wildly ooc takes on the foundation and him in part 2#really wish more people took the time to actually see and appreciate his character for what he actually is#sorry this got so long but i wanted to get this out of my chest bc i too saw one of those posts again and was like#BRU not this shit AGAIN#also.if i sound bitter its because i am genuinely sick and tired of the speedwagon slander and people completely misreading him#and turning him into something he is not and often completely ignoring him bc of that fanon image ppl have made of him#along with completely disregarding the fact that he's actually one of the most important characters in all jjba#and instead pretending or wrongly assuming that he was just some 'hehe funni meme uwu guy'#jjba#long post#bit of a vent / rant too#robert e o speedwagon#speedwagon#jojo#character analysis: speedwagon#phantom blood#battle tendency#speedwagon foundation#jojo's bizarre adventure#analysis: speedwagon foundation#character analysis#meta#ok to rb
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I finished 2 more tickletober fics today! they’ll be up in the next day or two
#one is widomauk of course lol#the other is that book series RELIC and it’s real cute#YALL SHOULD READ IT HEHE#I enjoyed very much#Jackson and Baja have an excellent dynamic for tickles#strong quiet tough serious guy and cute teasing jackass boyfriend YES#throw in two idiot brothers who love embarrassing you?#the fics are for day 14 soft and day 30 caught#FOUR MORE LEFT FOUR MORE LEFT#I have iDEASSSS#personal#tickletober
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Lessons
˚ʚfwb!Bang Chan x fem!Readerɞ˚
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ summary: Just a regular session of your best friend helping you learn Korean <3
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ word count: 1.6k
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ warnings: fem!reader, nicknames; ‘honey and good girl,’ pvssy slaps, playful ass&thigh spanking, Chris calls himself Daddy once lol, rough sex, creampie (try to pee after sex pls <3)
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ notes: max and I spoke about this a few weeks ago and it was soo hot so I wanted to write something for it,,, but then I lost motivation for it for a while😭 anyways hope u enjoy <3
OH and thank you for 700 followers!! (im late so now so ~25 away from 800) :''') I have something planned for if/when I hit 1k hehe, Love u guys :>
DO NOT republish or translate+post my work!
After you had moved to Korea, you made it your sole goal to be completely fluent in Korean as soon as possible. You knew the basics and some vocabulary that got you through day-to-day encounters, but holding an actual conversation past introductions was rather difficult. So, this is how you found yourself in your current situation. Your best friend and fuck buddy of 2 years giving you weekly Korean lessons.
And this? This was a normal thing between you both. Sitting in his lap practicing while he sits there explaining things and kneading your thighs mindlessly. It was a normal occurrence! The only difference is you usually wore sweats or some sort of bottom that would cover your legs more. Today was one of the hotter days of the week, so you disregarded the extras and opted to only wear one of his shirts, nothing else.
His hands rubbed eagerly up and down your thighs, squeezing the flesh like he does with soft pillows. Again, it was normal, but today he seemed to be restless with his movements. You couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath when he mindlessly squeezed the flesh of your inner thigh rather roughly while he translated a word you couldn’t figure out. “What is up with you today? You’re more touchy-feely than usual.”
“Sorry haha. Had a long day so I’m fidgety.. And you know I can’t resist you in nothing but my shirt.” You only hummed in response. You believed what he said, but you also knew that he wasn’t stupid and that the apology was not for his roughness as much as it was for how riled up he knew you were getting. He was never actually sorry about being physically affectionate with you, but you both knew how you tended to get very horny when his hands were on you so desperately.
“Mmmm.. Let me play with you a little while you read, okay?” You shake your head and push your study items away, pulling a laugh from him when you mumbled out ‘Fuck that, I need you.’
“None of that hahaha. Focus on the reading, honey.” He said, placing a kiss on your cheek before leaning down and biting into your neck. You groaned and leaned back into him, grinding against him in an attempt to make him fold in your favor. He let the first few grinds pass as he left hickeys along your neck, but the second your hands cupped him through his shorts he grabbed your hips to still your movements.
“Hey.“ The commanding tone in his voice caught you off guard and had your hands immediately stop in their tracks. “Stop that. You’re going to finish reading this text and then I’ll fuck you nice and good.”
“It’s not that serious, Chris. It's just a few paragraphs, we can do it after or just skip out this week.. Plus it’s your fault I’m this horny anyways.” The attitude in your voice makes him narrow his eyes, and then he grabs your chin and angles you to look back at him.
“Watch your tone. And I’m not gonna tell you again,” His hand grabbed both of yours and placed them on the table before moving to spread your legs open for him. Then, he finishes his sentence and enunciates each word with a harsh smack to your bare cunt. “Finish. Reading. The. Article.” The last one comes off harder than the others and it pulls a squeal from you, making your hands shoot down and wrap around his wrist while your legs slam shut against his hand. He grabs from your inner knee and hooks your legs over his, keeping you spread for him, and he pulls your book closer again.
You can feel the teasing smile on his face after he places a kiss on your cheek and then speaks against it. “You only have one article left, honey. The quicker you read it, the quicker I can bend you over and fuck you into the table~” You can’t help but whine and nod. Once you look down at the material again, Chris’ hands that were previously rubbing your inner thigh move back to rub along your wet folds.
Then for what feels like the next hour, but was really just 20 long minutes, you slur out the words in front of you as best as you can. Chris’ left hand swapped between drawing circles into your clit and pinching your nipple, while his right hand shoved fingers against your walls. And every couple of minutes he would swap between kissing your neck to sucking hickeys into your collarbone. However, you weren’t allowed to cum and any time you mispronounced something or took too long to read a word, a stern slap was sent against your clit. As long as you continued to read well, he would pump 3 of his fingers in and out of you.
By the time you’re halfway through the material, your mind is foggy and you’re almost drooling on yourself from the constant edging. By the time you’re on the last sentence, your legs are shaking and you're slumped against him letting out quiet moans. Your neck and collarbone were so red from his incessant suckling, and you were desperate to get this over with. And then, when you finally finished, he stopped all movements to place a soft, congratulatory slap on your thigh and massaged your hips.
“Good girl… Now was that so hard?” With that, he hurriedly clears the desk before helping you stand and then standing himself. The chair you both rested on was kicked backwards and your whole world spun as he suddenly pinned you to the desk. You whined as his hand held a tight grip in your hair and pushed your face into the table. His free hand playfully squeezed and slapped at your ass a few times before you heard his shorts and boxers hit the floor.
You sighed out his name as he teased his tip through your folds, silently pleading with him to hurry it up. “Shhhhhh… ‘Atta girl. You did so well, baby. Now let me take care of you, yeah?”
He finally sunk in and nothing but low, whiny moans left your lips as you clenched around him. His free hand grabbed a handful of your ass, squeezing it in appreciation while he slowly sunk every inch he had to offer. Once he bottomed out he gave you only a little bit of time before his thrusts started, albeit slowly at first but quickly ramping up due to his own impatience. It doesn’t take long for him to change to an unforgiving and rougher pace, his hand still holding your head against the table.
“Fff-fuck.. Christopherrr-”
“Yeah yeah, baby. Daddy’s got you. ‘M nice and deep, just how you like it right?” You missed the way he smirked when you let out a desperate ‘Uh-huh’ in response, but you could feel the way it encouraged him when his hips slammed against yours with more eagerness. He keeps this pace up for a while until he feels you tighten around him, and then he changes to slow, deep thrusts that make your eyes roll into your skull.
The hand in your hair slides on top of yours on the desk, intertwining your fingers, and he leans forward to place his forehead between your shoulder blades, “Mmmm keep squeezing me, Honey. Fffuck, juuust like that..”
When you’re tipping over the edge, he places a kiss on your sweaty skin and moans against it. “That’s it, baby. Cum for me and I’ll fill you up just how you like it, okay?” You want to nod, but everything hits you at once so you can only cry out against your desk.
As your orgasm starts to fade into overstimulation, he fixes his posture and focuses on his hip movements. A squeaky moan falls from your lips as he suddenly bottoms out and the hold on your hip tightens. He threw his head back and bit his bottom lip as he came, attempting to muffle his whiney moans. He rides out his orgasm by sometimes pulling out and snapping his hips harshly against yours.
“Fuck… If that’s how we end the studying session from now on, I might consider this payment.” He jokes.
You let out a breathy laugh and he starts to pull out slowly, pushing you into the table as he did so. You take the moment to catch your breath when you realize he’s gone quiet and there’s the light feeling of breath on your thighs. Your head snaps back and you realize he was kneeling in order to watch his cum slide down your folds.
“Hey!” you whine and place a hand on his forehead, pushing his face away only for him to resist, so you use your feet to push him harder. He laughs at your embarrassment and stands up, pulling you to sit up as well and lifting the shirt off of you. He uses it to wipe you down before throwing it into your hamper and grabbing one of his spare shirts from your dresser. He steals a kiss before covering you in the shirt, then drags you to the living room to watch a tv show together.
You two spend the rest of the night on the couch, watching tv and relaxing in each other’s warmth. It’s no surprise when soft snores are heard and you look down to see his sleeping face squished into your chest. You huff out a laugh before you snuggle him closer. Then, your eyes get heavy until they inevitably close, and you fall asleep too.
Taglist:
@jiminssluttyminx @changisworld @juskz @linohumina
#sian’s writing#skz smut#stray kids smut#stray kids x reader#stray kids imagines#bang chan smut#bang chan x reader#bang chan x reader smut#bang chan imagines#chan smut#chan x reader#chan x reader smut#chan imagines#skz x reader#skz x reader smut
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Ateez as Boyfriends [Explicit Ver.]
yet another collab with loren @eightmakesonebraincell. idk what this is but it's smut and it's a filthfest in here sooo MDNI!!
lmao when we think about it now we don't even know how we came to write this (speed write it more like) but this has collected dust in the drafts for a good while anddd it's our first time writing smut like this (minus my woo fic) so here we are :') Enjoy!
Hongjoong
eye fucks you
literally when he is in the mood he will let his eyes scan you ever so slowly
tease.
i just think that most of the times you’ll be in the studio
and studio sex calls for you in his lap to get his attention
while his attention remains undivided on his pc
until you grind-
one wrong move and you’re done for
if he doesn’t want you to break his focus at that moment, he’s probably gonna growl and bite your shoulder with the promise of what’s about to come
and threaten you with things he would do to you once he is free
however, if you've succeeded?
immediately on to you
lips everywhere and anywhere on your body
tongue in your mouth
i feel like even if he tries to go slow, he’s the type to lose control in the middle of it
and go super intense and heated
loves it when his hands are on your hips and controlling your movement
the type to wedge his thigh between your legs as you make out
and watch you become a mess as you grind on it
or when you’re sitting on him, he’ll hook your legs over his to stop you from closing them
he’ll finger you until you’re squirming in his lap
punish you for distracting him and being a bad girl
neck kisses he’s gonna leave pretty marks all over you
will praise the f outta you (not me censoring this.)
will probably move around a lot during sex
like one moment you’re in his lap
next you’re on the couch, he’s on top of you
until you switch
and then he has you standing up and suddenly you’re pinned against the wall
will not miss a chance to go down on you
knows exactly how to make you cry
and i mean cry.
laughs against your throbbing core and the vibrations oh goodness
absolutely loves the feeling of your fingers gripping his hair in desperation
nips you everywhere
and when you’re finally begging him to give you what you want, that’s when he’ll let you have some moment of control
probably curses in pleasure
loves watching you on top of him but makes sure you know who’s in control (him)
he’s gonna spice things up when you’re reaching climax
i think i said he knows how to make you cry so go ahead and imagine
will overstimulate you before he wraps things up hehe
i just feel like his fingers on your clit right before you come and it’s 10x more intense
would love to come inside you when he can ;)
hongjoong would also probably record the audio of your moans during sex and when you climax (with consent ofc)
and on nights when he’s missing you he’ll play it through his headphones and touch himself wishing you were here
takes such good care of you when you’re done like you joke that he’s suddenly worried if you’re okay when he fucked you like there’s no tomorrow-
but really he’s all prepared he’s immediately making sure you have what you need- water, cuddles, round 2, you name it
will kiss your forehead as he assures you you’re his muse, the love of his life and all that sweet stuff :’)
you whine that you feel all sticky and gross
he definitely has an abundance of tissues and wet wipes in his studio
when people ask him why he has so many he tells them it’s for yknow cleaning
if you guys are back home in the shower though?
omg he is so soft and all about the romance
makes you feel so so loved
holds you in his arms for the longest time
or you’re in the middle of doing something and he grabs your wrist
and pulls you towards him with the biggest smile on his face
hands on your hips as he sways you around
and you just know that look in his eyes means he’s in the mood and he’s going to make this a memorable night for both of you
you’ll hook your arms around his neck and sway to the music that is in your heads
guided by his movements
he tells you what he’s feeling. no filters
and you appreciate that so much about him
would definitely have a post-sex playlist that he’s made with like slow candle-lit dinner vibes
plays it with a speaker in the bathroom as he presses long and lazy kisses against you
basically a very love-driven makeout session :((
hehe but he most definitely nibbles all over the marks he’s left on you with a sense of achievement
loves when you wear one of his shirts over just your panties as you go to bed together
it’s the possessiveness in him i’m telling you
he’s quick to fall asleep but you can see a faint smile on his lips as you caress his head or his face
and you tell him all the reasons you love him
you can swear his hold on you tightens even though he is fast asleep
and you’re going to wake up with him looking at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he has ever laid eyes on :((
even tho you look like an absolute mess in the morning-
Seonghwa
tongue.
man has a mouth on him like have you seen his lips?
the prettiest lips in ateez
and his tongue????
he is the best kisser in ateez fight me
he knows how deadly his tongue is
and he’s going to use that to his advantage
makeout sessions are gonna be next level with him
and when his tongue goes elsewhere-
like when he kisses your neck?
or anywhere for that matter??
you literally cannot breath
it’s like it’s turning him on too
makes the dirtiest noises you bet
he loves the feeling of your thighs clenching around him because it means that you’re close
he praises you and tells you that you have the prettiest moans
loves that you’re making those sounds just for him
he’ll enjoy overstimulating you
he coos and tells you to give him one more orgasm baby as he digs his fingers knuckle-deep into you
he knows your body so well
he can tell exactly when you’re about to come
like, he’ll say “come for me” because he knows that’s what tips you over the edge
and then when he’s satisfied with how many times you’ve come for him
that’s when he gets started
when you guys are fucking there are two different moods
sometimes he likes to take it slow and worship your body
pepper kisses all over your face and anywhere he can reach
presses his body against yours like he has to be touching every part of your exposed skin
drags his length in and out of you slowly so he can feel every inch of you
will latch his lips onto yours and explore your mouth with his tongue
likes to hold your hand :’((( i love him so much
other times it’s hot and fast and needy
his hands roam all over your body and through your hair
rolls your nipples between his fingers to make your back arch
moans into the kisses
bites your lower lip
either lets you run your hands wherever you want or pins them to whatever surface you’re on
you fist the sheets beneath you or grip his shoulders
he grunts and pants in between praises of how tight you are and how good you feel
before he’s coming hard into you
i’m convinced that when hwa comes his eyes roll back and he lets out the deepest moan
it’s so filthy his expression alone can make you reach your climax honestly
his warmth fills you up (pls use a condom irl)
and when he pulls out, the sight of his cum leaking out of you has him half-hardening again
he loves to see how he’s ruined you
and you best bet he’ll help clean you up-
with his mouth
he’ll hold your legs apart as you writhe from sensitivity
as soon as you both come down from your orgasms, it’s like all the dom has left his body
he literally becomes the softest when he’s doing aftercare like his touch is suddenly delicate and he’s holding you like you’re fragile
“sir, i’m pretty sure you’ve left bruises on my body but okay”
“ah, did i? shall i kiss them so they get better?”
and you grin bc you’re lovestruck
and he feels so proud that he made you smile bc that means you’re okay
literally every second sentence that comes out of his mouth will be praise
that you did so well for him
that you’re so beautiful
that you’re all that he could ever ask for
<33333
peppers soft kisses on your face and kisses your knuckles
brings you sth warm to drink and cuddles you all night
i feel like he’s the type to love feeling skin on skin when cuddling
especially after having sex
he just has his boxers on and you just have your panties on
and he loves to hold you close to him and just feel you next to him in such an intimate way :’(((
he can’t keep his hands off you but it’s completely innocent
traces little patterns and shapes on your back
splays his hand over your tummy
rests a hand over your chest bc he likes to feel your heartbeat
and he does it unconsciously too, even during pillow talk
you two can talk for hours about anything and everything deep into the night
it doesn’t even matter what the pillow talk is about all you two want is to hear each other’s voices
imagine hwa’s post-sex husky deep voice akjfldsg
but you two talk and cuddle for so long neither of you even realise when you’ve fallen asleep
in the morning he wakes up before you but he stays cuddling you until you wake up so that he’s the first thing you see <33
there’ll be lots of lazy kisses before he gets up to make you a cute breakfast
Yunho
eye fucks you pt 2
literally the way he just watches you at times
like he’s drinking in the sight of you
before he kisses you he’s going to cup your face and look at you for the longest time
and you can see a thousand undecipherable emotions in his eyes
hesitates a bit before he kisses you but once you’re into it he’s a changed man
idk about you but i feel like his tongue can do wonders
i just think he’s a natural at this he kisses you like he’s been doing it forever and will never get tired of it
makeout turns heated pretty quick and one thing leads to another-
will be vocal during sex too like
he needs to hear you say some stuff before you proceed
he needs to hear your voice to confirm you’re feeling good
he’s pretty much driven on that
he aims to please you.
his hands. need i say more?
he drives you crazy with his hands alone
even when they’re cupping your face or like holding you behind your neck
you love his hands in your hair
you love it when you feel his big hands anywhere on your body for that matter
especially when they’re gripping your thighs
and his long fingers omg
just a brush of them in the inside of your thigh or near your core and you’re done for
makes you a writhing mess before he will even touch you
will also pin you on nearest surfaces
and lets his mouth and thighs do the rest
probably loves when you ride his thigh too as he makes out with you
to the point you almost come on that alone
he just loves when you want to be in control but he restrains you
and you gladly let him
will at times let you dom him
but he just thinks that you’re cute for trying
really, he’s watching all smug, watching you on top of him, waiting until he’s had enough
and then he’s flipped you
he’s pinned you to the bed and he dwarfs you grrr
“now it’s my turn”
if you think cuddling while lovemaking is a soft trait? make it hard for yunho
like he’s just burying his nose in the crook of your neck while he pumps into you
spoons you from behind as he rubs his length against your ass
or kissing your temple or head and moaning against you
and oh goodness his weight on you when he’s on top of you i-
will mumble praise into your ear
“you’re so fucking wet baby” hdsjhjkdfhg
“you feel so good”
and you’ll def praise him in return he loves that
not afraid to experiment with you
and he’s always just so supportive of your wants and needs
he’s also fully capable of driving you insane like he can be a little shit sometimes-
his hand around your throat.
his hand being able to wrap around both of your wrists
loves to pin your wrists above your head
when he’s approaching his orgasm he’ll see what you need
probably loves it when you come together
and he’ll pump all that inside you he won’t stop
will remain inside for a good few moments until he pulls out
and then it's just another round of teasing each other as he takes care of you
“can we shower together now?” but you know it will lead to shower sex
“will you let me spoon you after i clean you up?”
“only if i don’t find your dick hardening against my ass in the middle of the night, yunho”
the teasing is just ramped up honestly
you two flick soap suds at each other
he smacks your ass and it startles you and you slip a little in the shower
he makes sure to catch you but you smack his chest as revenge even though you two are giggling
when you step out of the shower he’ll throw your towel over your head so it covers your face
the man runs out of the bathroom before you can throw the towel back at him
he’s just streaking through the house naked at this point
it takes a while for you two to calm down enough to actually get into bed
but there’s definitely another hour or two of very handsy teasing
mostly from him as you giggle at his antics
and lots of hypothetical discussions about things you guys could try out next time
but also not hypothetically because he would totally be down lol
he’ll be like “okay but what if we restrained your wrists to the shower curtain bar, do you think it’d break?”
and you say you can try next time but if it does break he’s paying not you
you’re just both a laughing mess in each other’s arms as you fall asleep
Yeosang
vanilla guy
he can move his tongue 180 degrees do you all know what use he can make of that?
he’s either super shy super shy~ or he’s gonna be the demon that we all know he is
his kisses range from shy to heated and rushed
like when he’s shy he’s all smiles and cautious touches
but you can literally taste it when he’s desperate
because his body language changes significantly
suddenly he’s the most confident
kinda feel like lingerie really turns him on
like whenever you wear something lacy or revealing
his length is already hardening before he knows it
sometimes he tries to hide it
other times he comes right up to you and growls into your ear that he needs you right now
his favourite place to do it might be in the bed
he just wants to make sure you’re comfortable first and foremost
and i feel like he’s a switch
he has his dom days he has his sub days too
sometimes he just needs you to lead and he loves watching you when you take the lead
he lets you do whatever you want to him
like he’ll watch as you unbutton your shirt and slip off your bra
and when you lean down to take off his pants
he’ll let you kiss him and touch him however you like
but when you start teasing him?
i feel like he has a switch that goes off and bam he’s now in dom mode
and he’s suddenly flipped positions and he’s like “i’ve had enough sweetheart”
and he’s banging into you with no remorse
and you swear his beautiful deep voice does something to you makes you feral is what it does
tucks your hair out of the way as he pumps his length into you
holds your face :( he’s so precious grrrrr
swipes his thumb across your lower lip
daring you to try something like-
he’s a tease he knows what game you’re playing
and if you try to capture his thumb between your teeth he’s gonna be like ‘nuh-uh not so quick’
like he can be the sub and still be in charge how beautiful is that
bonus points if you make him laugh or make him shy during sex
you love to see it when you praise him and he gets all flustered
but boi does he know how to make you lose your shit too
esp when he’s in control and just running his hands all over your body
tracing all your curves as he drinks in the sight and praises you so. much.
as if he isn’t a walking sculpture himself :’)
loves watching your little reaction and catches on real quick
like if you writhe under him when he kisses your sweet spot? he’s gonna be all smug and you bet the night has gotten longer
because he will spend his sweet time there
and when he’s fingering you or eating you out he will do everything to get the best reactions out of you
aftercare is 90 percent him fussing over you
even though you reassure him that you’re okay from under the mountain of blankets he’s piled over you
he literally treats you like a queen
also because he wants to give you everything that you might even potentially need
so he like
brings you a whole platter of warm tea, water, energy drinks, salty snacks, packets of lollies, chocolates, you name it
will also ask if you need painkillers or anything
you better give that man his aftercare too he deserves it
you slip him bits of chocolate or snacks
sometimes after he’s had one of those days where he’s radiated dom energy or he’s teased you a lot
you bring it up with him and wiggle your eyebrows
like “so i’m your good girl, huh”
and he gets so flustered and shy and does his little giggle
but you never tease him too much, because you know that he can start to doubt himself or feel insecure
so you always make sure to tell him how good and perfect he is no matter what he does
he deserves all the love in the world <3
so after you let him fuss over you for a while you sort of just, fling up the side of your blanket and say
“get in here”
and he has such a cute bright smile as he burrows underneath the covers with you
sometimes he spoons you
but more often than not
you spoon him
and he feels so safe and loved whenever you hug him like that :’(
you love to run your fingers through his long locks because his hair feels super soft
but also because you can almost hear the purr that comes out of yeosang when you do it
he’s a precious baby :(
San
a switch nobody can convince us otherwise
he can be a hard dom
manhandles you, like have you seen the way he is with woo??
holds your jaw to make you look at him
or he gets up close and crowds your personal space
passes you the dirtiest looks
will stare at you for the longest time just to see what your reaction will be
loves it when you get flustered and shy
doesn’t care if you’re in public his touches will look casual to others
but you’ve memorised what his hand placement means
like when his hand on your waist slowly lowers to your hip, you know it’s gonna be a long night
teases you during sex, like he’ll lightly drag his fingers around your upper thighs and on your lower stomach but never touching your core
and he’ll ask you what do you want
he wants you to be vocal and beg for him to touch you
and when you do he’ll rip away your clothes and go down on you like he’s starved
he unbuttons your clothes and unclasps your bra with one hand and that alone makes you so wet
fondles your breasts with one hand while he circles your clit with the other
he latches his mouth onto your neck and collarbones and sucks on your nipples
has your back arching from all the different sensations all at once
but he’s also the subbiest sub to exist
like can you imagine him whimpering underneath you
this time he’s the one begging
he begs to touch you
and he begs for you to touch him, kiss him, anything
he doesn’t care if there are people in the next room or if they can hear him
he just needs to be inside of you
man always does it like it’s his first time taking you
like you’re blown by how much he can enjoy this every time it just gives you that confidence boost too
and he’s big on praise as well
loves being loud during sex
makes the unholiest noises-
makes the most intense eye contact and if you dare shy away from him?
“look at me when i’m looking at you”
jksdhgjghjghksgh
^that’s your reaction btw
his kisses become more messy as things escalate and he just
he wishes he could kiss you everywhere all at once
switches positions so many times but mostly because he needs to feel closer to you in every aspect
might have a thing for putting your legs over his shoulders as he pumps into you
will make you scream without a doubt
like his aim is to make you see stars and boi do you get lost
so you also love to return the favour
and he’s not all that hard to please all you have to do is push the right buttons and say the right things
but you prolong the process on purpose
because you too enjoy seeing him break under you
it’s just that he makes you feel so good about yourself
he makes you feel like you’re everything he’s ever wanted and then some
will make you come on his fingers
and then lick them clean-
will make you come on his dick next
and break right after he can’t handle you becoming a mess on him
collapses next to you and laughs in disbelief because how good was that?
takes a few moments to gather himself, all the while caressing your skin
and kissing you- the softest kisses
before he gets up and takes care of you
and he’s so so good at that
he’s cleaning you up, making sure you’re hydrated, helping you into bed and then the cuddlefest starts
lies against the pillows and then shifts you so that you’re basically half-lying on top of him
he loves when you rest your head on his chest, an arm and a leg slung over the top of him too
(half the reason he works out his shoulders and chest is so that you have more pillow surface area hehe)
in these moments he wishes he has three hands
one to hold you against him
one to caress and run through your hair
and one more to hold your hand with :(
he just has to settle for alternating between the three
and all the while he is just constantly. pressing. kisses. against the crown of your head
“i love you”
“i love you too, san”
and not even twenty seconds later
“i love you so much”
“i love you so much too, san”
repeatedly confesses his love to you because it’s true he loves you so much it’s crazy
and when he can hear the sleep starting to cling to your voice, he’ll wish you goodnight
with many more kisses to go along with it <33
he doesn’t let go of you once during the night
Mingi
have you seen his hip rolls-
okay from the start
9/10 times it starts with you cuddling
it’s all good and nice and fluffy and you’re watching something or just scrolling
he just likes to be in physical contact with you in any way
one of you is mindlessly touching the other- very casual at first
casual kiss on your bare shoulder or you kissing his jaw or knuckles
until one of you is in the mood and starts touching the other with purpose
and wait until the other starts squirming visibly
if you’re in his lap? you’re gonna feel it before he can even tell you
and you turn around all smug
but he doesn’t give you time to react because he will kiss you
he’s also prob really big on makeouts
he just loves the feel of his lips on yours as if they’re made for each other
or his tongue inside your mouth and the way you move under him while he kisses you
will have a good proper makeout session before you proceed
his hands will literally travel everywhere
plays with your breasts as he kisses you
also he will kiss every inch of you
and when he goes down on you?
he knows his nose brushing against your clit is your undoing
and he takes advantage of it
the tip of his nose glistening undoes something in you-
will basically make out with your clit
and make you come multiple times on his fingers and tongue before he gives you what you want
those hands squeezing your hips along with that really don’t help-
eats you out like a man starved
but before that
he’s also the type to get his own fair share of oral
and you would love to please him as well
you want that
you love it when he rolls his hips, clutching your hair, whether his cock is in your mouth or inside you
and when you’re having sex even tho he gives dom energy, he likes you on top
he’s just gonna be holding your hips and making you bounce on him
he’s gonna slow it down, make it bouncy ;)
your hands on his chest
he’s gonna watch you with those eyes
and groan a lot it fuels you
it drives him crazy when you snake a hand down to your front to circle your own clit
and when you climax and collapse against his chest, he’ll hold you steady against his chest and grip your ass
will plant his feet against the bed so that he can pump up into you
i feel like he can be pretty filthy in the best way
like he likes it messy
he wants to make you a mess in every sense
he will spill inside you all over you and be proud of it and look at the mess like it’s a work of art
and the air smells of sweat, sex and love <3
will probably prompt another round-
if he lets you have your way first, he’s def going to have his way in the second round
and that could entail a lot of things
but at some point, it’s definitely gonna be him pinning your wrists down on the bed with one hand
while his own thighs holds your open
and he makes you see stars with his fingers alone
and at some point
it’s going to be him pounding relentlessly into you, a hand on your back pinning you down to the bed
and the second round is always so much more intense
you think you’re spent? he knows exactly how to get you riled up again
but he knows when you’re tired and done even when you say you want more
so he just turns very soft all of a sudden and kisses you like a boy having his first kiss
because he’s so in love with you :((
and then he’s gonna tell you what you mean to him
he’s gonna make you look at him as he tells you how beautiful you are and how you mean the whole world to him
sometimes he sees doubt in your eyes but he won’t go away until he clears it
and then you’re both giggling and he’s looking around wondering what to do
“the towels first, please,” you giggle again and he hops off the bed, laughing to himself
probably drags you in the shower with him too and teases you a lot there
so much that sometimes you have another round there-
always so fun with him innit
but he makes sure you’re fed, hydrated, clean and content before he joins you in bed and the cuddlefest starts
human pillow i said what i said
and he’ll caress your hair or skin as he tells you about something that happened at work or you rant about something that annoyed you today
and he jokes and teases you and you slap his chest and he’s suddenly a laughing mess and you’re joining
and then at some point, you both fall asleep in each other’s arms <3
Wooyoung
omega vibes.
a bratty sub
and wooyoung literally ousts himself as having a degrading kink
not his heart fluttering when hongjoong bossed him around
he likes to tease you and frustrate you all day
a quick smirk here
a sneaky touch there
feel like wooyoung would also make you wear vibrating panties or put a remote-controlled vibrator in you
will turn the vibration up at the worst times
like when you’re talking to someone or when it’s super quiet
he’ll give you the cheekiest grin from across the room
especially when a noise accidentally slips out of you
he loves watching you awkwardly fumble and pretend you didn’t just moan
sometimes in the bedroom when he’s pressing the vibrator against your clit, he’ll pull away at the last second just before you reach your orgasm
and he’ll be like oops sorry :))
until the sexual tension makes you snap
he lets you flip him over or pin him against the wall as you kiss his lips swollen and mark his neck until it’s bruised
and you can feel how smug he is
he loves when you show him his place
and when you mark him with hickeys
you’ll push him onto the bed
and sometimes you tie his wrists together
he’s such a brat you can’t help but try and tame him even when you know it’s hopeless
so you just give up midway and he’s all smug and laughing and you’re like okay have your way then
it’s just very fun with him never a boring moment
and feels like a game of who has more control (you’ve got equal points)(you’re both in negative)
you bet he keeps a record of that
also he gets turned on at the strangest of times
you’re cleaning and he saw you bend down to get that dust? he’s turned on
you almost tripped and made the cutest face afterwards and he teases you but you glare at him? he’s turned on
but the same goes for you
all he has to do is roll his sleeves and display his delicious veiny arms while he cooks
and you’re a whining mess
he knows it
we all love wooyoung in the kitchen
speaking of the kitchen-
no one would eat the food he makes if they knew how many times he’s fucked you on the countertop lol
but he fucks you on every surface he can so-
he loves going down on you mostly because of the noises you make when he’s eating you out
and he knows exactly what move of his tongue or lips against your core earns what noise
he knows you have a thing for his nose digging into your clit too
so he’s gonna make the most of it ;)
will let your thighs squeeze him as he makes out with your clit
but when he pushes them apart? the veins on his arms pop and you can’t help but run your fingers all over them
his arms are just such a work of art
and then he’s trailing kisses up your body and kissing you as if he’s short on breath
also has a thing for fisting your hair when you go down on him
and oh goodness does he make the most pretty sounds you’ve ever heard
basically the two of you live to rile the other up no matter what way it is <3
when he’s finally inside you, he’s either taking full control or just letting you do whatever you want there’s no in-between
mostly it’s the latter because he loves to see you ride him
but just because you’re on top of him doesn’t mean you’ve got full control. he makes sure you know that
because he is going to pound into you from under you and make you see stars <3
aftercare is something ingrained in him
it’s like he gets all his energy back just to take care of you :((
he’s fussing over you, not letting you move before he cleans you up and makes you drink or eat something
he has to give the green light for you and at this point, you let him
because who wouldn’t enjoy a fussy woo??
and then he’s like “let’s shower together ;) “ and you’re like
“ah. is that what all of this was for?”
not complaining though
but the best part about showering together isn’t another round- that’s rare
you simply love it when you’re washing each other up
he loves when you shampoo his hair and massage his scalp
and he rubs the knots out of your neck or arms or thighs
wherever you might be feeling sore from your escapades lol
there’s still a couple of teasing remarks and wandering hands here and there
but he makes sure you’re all warm and dry before he tucks you into bed or wraps you in a huge fluffy blanket on the couch
he’ll insist that you do nothing while he cooks up a small meal for you two because if you two hadn’t become distracted during the process of making dinner, then you two are hungry from the energy you’ve expended LOL
and when he���s made sure you’re absolutely full he’ll cuddle you until you both succumb to food coma
Jongho
we all know he’s not physically affectionate
but boi does it look like he’s been doing this all his life
big on foreplay
gets you all hot and bothered first with the way his fingers run over your arms or your thighs
gentle squeezes in between or like something muttered in your ear
until you can’t take it anymore and you make the first move
slow kisses are his things like he loves the intimacy when you’re just making out like you have all the time in the world
and he’s shy at first def, will laugh and joke between kisses just so he can get super comfortable
before he turns into a monster
peppers kisses all over your face :(
has a knack for making you feel like you’re the most precious thing in this world
to him you are <3
has a thing for necks
will kiss your neck and your sweet spot until it turns red
probably nibble on it too he’d love to see you marked by him
will trail kisses all the way down
will play with your breasts for the longest time as well
just teasing you and making a mess out of you
before he lets his fingers touch you down there and find you already soaked
and god does it give him an ego boost
anddd that’s where things get interesting
watches your every move when he touches you down there
and has a shit-eating grin on his face throughout
(which you love you’re not even gonna complain)
he’s gonna make you come multiple times on his fingers that’s a given
he loves to watch you move under him and will probably have a hand on your stomach to brace you and refrain your movements
which drives you so fucking crazy
you’re going to beg for him before he ever lets his cock near you
and when he’s ready for that, he’ll make it so agonisingly slow
will 100 percent grip your thighs as he spreads them apart and just let you feel him against you
before he enters you
he takes a moment to relish in the feeling of your tight walls against him- he can never get enough of that
will pump slowly into you first before it becomes rushed and then-
uses his strength to manhandle you into the position that he wants
he’ll hook his arms under your knees and pound you against the wall pls i need holy water stat
in your bedroom, in your living room, in the shower
omg when he gets all sweaty
and his muscles are glistening as they ripple with his movements lol
dom.
growls in your ears
smacks your ass 100 percent.
it drives him crazy to feel you trembling against him
or the way your nails dig into his shoulders and drag down his back as he fucks you
he thrives on the sounds you make to the point you’d almost think he’s getting off on that alone
if you come before him, he won’t stop pounding into you until he does
and boi does he still have some stamina left
but you have all the time in the world so he’ll take it slow again
build it up
make you want him again before he touches you
and it just keeps getting more heated, more interesting as the night gets darker
will make sure you’re not overwhelmed though, he really doesn’t want you to feel weird at any point of it all
he wants what you want, to the point you sometimes have to beg him to tell him what he wants
because he’s always focused on pleasuring you and you want to return the favour too
so on the rare occasions that he does let you take the reins, you make it a night he won’t forget ;)
by the time you’re done you’re so tired but this man still has some stamina
so he takes you to the shower with him and washes you up :( <3
dries your hair for you too :(
you’re so sleepy by now but he’ll carry you to bed :(
and then you cuddle and make jokes until you fall asleep feeling the most content ever
and even though jongho is starting to feel tired too, he fights to stay awake just so that he can cherish the feeling of you in his arms for just a little longer
presses soft little kisses on your forehead and down the tip of your nose and over your cheeks and along your jaw
he’s so soft please
when he really can’t hold off sleep any longer he’ll tuck you closer under his chin before he drifts off too with a smile on his face
has the audacity to giggle at you with his gummy smile when he sees you hobbling the next day because you’re kinda sore
but he’ll be at your beck and call for anything you need the rest of the day <3
#idk who wrote this i dont recognise her#ateez x reader#ateez smut#ateez scenarios#ateez imagines#hongjoong x reader#hongjoong smut#seonghwa x reader#seonghwa smut#yunho x reader#yunho smut#yeosang x reader#yeosang smut#san x reader#choi san smut#mingi x reader#mingi smut#wooyoung x reader#wooyoung smut#jongho x reader#jongho smut#ateez hard hours
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tags: step-brother!park jongseong x fem!reader, d/s dynamics, dom!jay x sub!reader, manipulation lowkey?, implied male masturbation, kissing, oral sex (f. receiving), dirty talk, use of nicknames (baby, princess, jjongie, etc), degradation (slut, whore, etc), spit kink, begging, daddy kink, unprotected sex (plz don’t), breeding kink, choking, praise kink, creampie, fluff and uncertainty at the end, etc
wc: 4.12k
add. notes: ok i know i said i would Not upload soon much less written work either but guess who lied!!! no but fr my mood was pretty terrible yst morning bcs of some stupid classmates not contributing to group work but u know what i had food n ice cream w my friend n i felt a bit better at the least. it still doesn’t excuse their actions but ya anyways bcs of my peace of mind n bcs i finished my part for my presentation, i present to u a Very long stepbro jay fic hehe.. some parts or sentences may look familiar but that's cus i acc sent them to a blog here as anon messages LMFAO but yea i hope u guys enjoy :3 icon creds to @/purinkiss btw!
. . .
ever since your parents’ divorce, your entire world shattered. it only got worse when your dad announced he’d be bringing home a new woman, much less one who had a child the same age as you. of course, you disagreed at first, throwing harsh words at him up until the point he forced you to meet the delinquent, dragging you by the arm to the restaurant where you were to have dinner with whoever these random people who were about to become part of your small family circle were. you’d even made a firm promise to yourself to not entertain them and to be petty, whether that translated through snide remarks or rolling your eyes, and you swear you really were going to go through with it—
that is, until you met jay.
jay was nothing like you’d imagined him to be. in your head, your new, soon-to-be stepbrother was an ugly, rude and snobby brat who didn’t give two cents about joining your family, the jay you met in reality though? everything but that. he was sweet, and polite, and absolutely fucking gorgeous; blonde hair swept back with a strand falling over his forehead, lean shoulders outlined in the tight fitting black shirt he’d decided to wear for the occasion, and a smile worth a thousand bucks or even dying for. any words that were previously on the tip of your tongue died down when he took your hand in his to shake it, the soft feel of his skin and his bright grin making your insides positively melt and the thoughts of your parents split dissipate within seconds.
your stepbrother’s attitude and good looks carried through the months you spent with him too. if anything, it became even more reinforced with him taking care of you whenever you needed him. he’d handle sharp objects for you while making your favourite food, hold your hand on the street if you had to cross the road, carry your bags when they got too heavy, rush in front of the door to open it for you, and so, so much more. you were at a privilege to be able to watch him walk around with nothing but a simple shirt and sweatpants around the house too, shamelessly raking your eyes over his attractive features and boring them into his back when he leaned over the stovetop to cook you ramen.
part of you felt like a perv, for behaving this way and finding him good looking even if he objectively was. you knew it wasn’t like you could help it, you had eyes and they obviously saw what was in front of you, but you tried shoving it down anyways. it also didn’t help that jay constantly hovered around you and made your relationship out to be so.. domestic. he’d narrow his eyes when he caught you talking on the phone to your friends about your latest hook-up, lecturing you on the use of safe sex and how college boys were no good for you until you were red in the face with embarrassment, or he’d offer for the both of you to hang out together after classes ended for you every other day, draping a blanket over your figures and scooching in close to you up until you could feel his body heat radiating off of him. your dad and his new wife thought nothing of it despite your mind spinning, cooing over how well you two got along and relishing in the fact that their children were such good siblings already.
oh, if only they were aware of the twisted fantasies swirling in jongseong’s mind.
because from the minute jay saw you, he knew he had to have you. your pretty face, your soft-spoken voice, and of course, your fucking body. he felt like he was about to lose his damn mind when he first saw you walk around the house in nothing but skimpy shorts and that stupid pink top that left nothing up to the imagination. to an extent, it almost felt like you were teasing him on purpose, especially when he’d find you seated on the couch with your exposed thighs and the subtle dip of your cleavage peeking through the measly clothes that practically coaxed him to sport a hard-on right then and there. it’d be the dead of night when he’d finally find some relief after a day of watching you parade around the kitchen, wondering what it would feel like to grip your hair in a makeshift ponytail and pull your nose flush to his pelvis with him nestled deep inside your throat. and it was only when jongseong came all over his hand and sheets for the nth time after fantasising about you that he realised he needed to do something about this, whether that went against his moral compass or not.
it started with light touches.
jay would grasp your shoulder to move past you when you were in the way, barely mumbling an ‘excuse me’ to alert you of his presence so you wouldn’t practically jump out of your skin when he did so. his hand would linger in yours for a second too long when he tried not losing you in crowds, gently commanding you to stay close to him in that stern tone of his that made your panties stick to you. it was common etiquette, you thought, he was just doing his job as a brother would normally do for his sister, but the only thing in jongseong’s mind was to make you let down your guard, let it down so much that he could swoop in at the perfect time to take advantage of it. he knew it was wrong, so sinister and dark to want to fuck his own stepsister to the point the only way he could get it up was to the thought of you, but jay didn’t care about any of that at this point, far too fucked out in his own head to think of having eyes for anyone but you.
and as expected, all throughout this, you didn’t suspect a thing. how could you? jay was so perfect, so well-mannered and so attentive. he listened to you rant about anything trivial in your life and drove you around when you wanted to meet up with your girls. he’d wake up late at night if you had a bad dream, consoling you even through the sight of your tears making him worked up, and rub your back softly when you needed to be taken care of. he’d let you sneak back in the house after you’d told your dad you were going out to the library to study, making up excuses for you when your lies fell short. he had your back, and in turn, you had his, so you would’ve never thought of him as anything but a gentleman and big brother.
until everything he did grew into more.
until having an arm behind your carseat while looking into the rearview mirror turned into placing his hand on your thigh, inches away from the seam of your skirt. until sitting next to him while watching a movie with a shared blanket turned into him nuzzling against you under the covered fabric. until having dinner with both your parents present at the dinner table turned into his foot grazing against yours ever so slightly.
until your honey-like voice calling out for him to help you get the glass on the top cabinet turned into full blown moans of you getting eaten out on the living room couch, echoing throughout the empty house because of-fucking-course, your parents were out for the night on a dinner date.
you weren’t even sure how it happened. one minute, you were struggling to reach on your tippy toes, your mouth instinctively moving to utter jay’s name because he was the only one besides you at home who could help out, but the next, he was pressing up against you to the point of grinding himself into your ass, causing you both to inhale sharply. you vaguely recall turning around, ready to ask what your stepbrother was doing when you’d caught sight of his darkened eyes, practically eyeing you like a piece of meat. and by the time anything even registered in your mind, his lips were already on yours, and his hand was dragging you over to the couch in record time.
“j-jay, we shouldn’t be doing this.” you stuttered out, your voice meek and quiet as you tried not to roll your eyes back at the sight of him slurping up your juices. he didn’t respond, instead opting to move his mouth up to focus on your clit, sucking it into the hot cavern and rolling his tongue against it to the point it had you seeing stars. you knew it was wrong, going against so many moral standpoints and rules, but god did it feel so good. you quickly came to understand that the jay who was going down on you currently was nothing like the jay who engages with you in your day to day life. that jay is gentle, well-meaning and answers all your questions despite how dumb they may seem. but this jay? he’s fucking filthy, messy to the point you can tell your juices are dribbling down his chin.
“fuck, you taste so good.” he gasps out when he finally decides to pull away. “thought about this so much when jerking off.” your eyes widen at his crude admittance, and you know you really should be disgusted at it, but something about the idea of jay being alone in the darkness of his room, hand wrapped around himself while saying your name under his breath only makes you wet, even more so than you already are. at the back of your mind, something screams at you to stop, but you’ve already gotten a taste of what your stepbrother can provide you, and you’d be damned if you didn’t stick around to find out more about it.
“this is wrong.” you quietly admit anyways, even if it’s not what you want to say. but jay just hums, leaning down to hover above your figure as his arms cage you in underneath him, doing very little to help the fact of how much smaller you feel below him. his lips ghost the shell of your ear as you shiver at the proximity between you two, and he gently nips at it, leaving you biting your tongue to hold back the noises you long yearn to let out. “i know it is, baby, but doesn’t it feel so fucking good?” jay questions with a low chuckle, pulling away to cock his head to the side. you curse internally at the way the nickname sounds coming from him, a dust of light pink spreading across your cheeks because fuck, how can someone be so alluring at all times?
“don’t you want to feel even better, princess?” jay’s voice draws you out, and you hold back a moan at the way he grinds his clothed bulge against your bare opening, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’s slowly convincing you over to the dark side. “don’t you want your big brother to spread this pussy open and fuck it ‘till you’re crying from how good it feels?” you almost nod, trying to resist the urge to buck your hips up to catch the sensation of his lower region against you once more. instead, you choose to turn your face away from his striking gaze staring you down, but jay just grips your jaw and turns you to face him once more, the action only making your insides swirl with delight.
“still, what if your mom and my dad find out?” you mumble, and jay just grins wickedly. he swoops in, dipping his head down to capture your lips in a searing kiss that makes you giddy with joy, sneaking his tongue past the opening of your mouth to lick into it. when he pulls back, there’s a thin line of spit connection you both, prompting you to squirm at the sight to which jay’s chest rumbles with laughter. “you’re so fucking cute, y’know that? been dreaming of having your pretty body underneath me since i met you.” he admits lowly, your wide eyes only spurring him on further. “wanna know what i think?” you slowly nod, unsure of where this is going. jay’s voice drops an octave lower as he leans in close and whispers—
“i think you’re a dirty, little slut who deserves to get fucked by her big brother.”
you can’t help the whimper that escapes you at his words this time, and that’s all the confirmation jay needs to sit up and tear off his shirt, bringing to life all the fantasies you’ve had about his body this entire time. you can’t stop yourself from reaching out a hand to touch him, nails grazing across the ridges of his toned stomach and the dip of his v-line that’s hiding the very thing you’ve been craving under his sweatpants. meanwhile, jay just watches you with lust swirling in his orbs, a small smirk playing at his swollen lips as he takes in the picture of your innocent little face ogling his figure. “you like what you see, don’t you, pretty?” he murmurs, biting his lip at the way you nod in shame. “don’t worry.” jay grunts, standing momentarily to loop his fingers inside the edges of his pants. “you’ll get what you’re craving real soon.” he winks before he’s yanking the only thing separating you both down, exposing himself in all his glory to your awaiting eyes at last.
“goddamnit, it’s pretty.” you think to yourself when your eyes finally settle on your stepbrother’s dick. the tip is an angry shade of red, dribbling with a few beads of precum that your face falls at when jay swipes them away with his thumb as he wraps his large hand around himself. your disappointment is short-lived, however, because he’s back on top of you soon, holding the very same thumb up to your awaiting mouth to taste, to which you eagerly wrap your lips around, the salty flavour of him invading your senses. “good girl.” jongseong commends as you suckle at the tip of his finger, the praise going straight to your core. he pulls his hand away from you after a short while, that same wet thumb snaking its way down to find your clit and pressing against it, which does nothing but rip a noise of satisfaction from you. jay continues to rub at your engorged nub, his gaze fixated on the sight of your pussy as if he’s trying to commit it to memory.
“shit. i can’t wait any more.” he growls after another second, retracting his hand to wrap it around himself instead, pumping once or twice before he’s pressing the head against your awaiting entrance. you watch with bated breath as he rubs against your folds, slicking up with your oozing juices until your patience starts wearing thin. “jay,” you huff after a minute, legs kicking up in frustration as your stepbrother glances at you teasingly. “what do you want, angel? use your big girl words and tell me.” he smiles, almost innocent to the point you even forget the compromising position you’re both in.
“want.. want you.” you admit shyly, averting your eyes to a forgotten corner in the room as jay tsk’s. “look at me when you speak, whore.” he spits out, his entire demeanour changing in an instant. it only makes you leak even more, and you swallow thickly, eyes pleading. “please fuck me, please. wan’ you to do what you said, spreading me open and using me until i cry, please, please, please. jjongie, daddy, please, i—“
you don’t even get the chance to finish because by the time both the nickname and title leave your mouth, jay has long lost his composure, instantly pushing inside you as he attempts to bottom out his large cock. he hisses at the way your warm walls envelop him, and the only thing you can do is cry out at the way you’re being stretched out to your limit, finally having the emptiness inside you satiated with the presence of your stepbrother’s dick. “fuuuck, that’s it, look at this tiny, little hole sucking me in.” jay curses, and you flare red in embarrassment at his nasty words, ignoring the way they only make you gush around him even more.
“i’m going to absolutely ruin you, baby.” is the only thing jay says before he’s pulling out and slamming himself back into you, leaving you to cry out as his mushroom tip instantly hits that one spot deep inside. his thrusts are erratic, filled with a fervour none of the other guys you’ve ever slept with had, and you think the way he’s fucking you now is definitely going to rectify his promise of fucking you until you’re crying, the occasion seeming to be very well on its way of happening.
“fuck, there is no way this is the last time we’re doing this.” jay groans, the noise of skin slapping and your moans echoing throughout the living room as he continues absolutely drilling you. each drag of his cock drives into you with sheer power and raw desire to completely destroy you it seems, and you’re sure nobody is ever going to top it. “gonna use you everywhere, every time i please. you want that too, don’t you? tell me you do, princess. tell me and daddy will fuck you like he means it every single time.” he blurts out. the only way you can respond is through incoherently mumbling and the nodding of your head, far too dazed out already at the way your stepbrother is pounding into you, which only draws a breathy laugh from jay. “seems i’ve fucked you dumb already, huh? cock that good? so good it’s got my baby all dumb?” he taunts. you only whine at his words, drool spilling out from the side of your lips which jay wipes off with a chuckle.
“i’m already close, god.” he sighs, his movements unrelenting and balls tightening with the way they slap against your ass. “want me to cum inside you? for daddy to breed this pussy full? maybe i should do it and make you walk around with my seed lodged deep in your messy cunt.” jay hisses, his hand snaking it ways to your neck as he continues talking. “bet you’d like that ‘cause you’re a filthy fucking bitch. letting your stepbrother fuck your tight cunt as he pleases.” slender fingers wrap around the skin and tighten their grip slightly to restrict your airflow, and that’s all it takes to abruptly push you over the edge, leaving you dropping your mouth open in a silent scream as you cum. jay continues fucking you through your high, making out your small mewls amongst the lewd sounds of his cock shoving into your hole.
“good girl, good fucking girl. did so well for me, came so much all for daddy. you’re so, so good to me, princess. fuck, i love you.” jay blabbers as he lets go of your neck, too lost in chasing his own peak to even realise what he’s just admitted. you don’t catch it fully either in your haze of overstimulation that he continues to fuck you through, but some unconscious part of you mutters it back as best as you can somehow. jay’s heart swells at the way you take him, so small and pliant for him to just use for his own good, and he leans in to smash his lips against yours, drinking in your loud sounds as his movements start to falter with his upcoming release washing over him.
“just a bit more, pretty, just a bit. such a good fucking girl for daddy, letting him use your body, fuck. i’m gonna cum deep inside you, angel. gonna reward you with my cum. you’d like that, wouldn’t you? like me to creampie this precious hole?” jay stammers out, the coil in his stomach close to snapping. he’s not sure how much longer he can keep up his exterior, sweat dripping down his forehead and closed eyes as his tired hips continue ramming his cock into you. he feels you wrap your arms around his neck, cracking his orbs open to find your fucked out face mumbling for his cum, your legs wrapping against his waist to keep him locked into you.
“cum in me, daddy, please cum in me. wan’ your cum, i’ll take it like a good girl. please, daddy.” you babble, and that’s all it takes to send jay over the edge too, loud groans leaving his mouth as he shoots thick ropes of white inside your walls, painting them with his release. he cums for what feels like forever, holding your body close to his as his cock throbs inside your spasming cunt that’s still greedily sucking him in, urging him to fill you up. he finally stops after seemingly a good minute, panting against your neck where he’s buried his face into as he lets the post-orgasm bliss wash over himself.
“fuck,” jay heaves a breath once he’s finally recovered, making sure to use his softening cock to keep you plugged up in fear his cum will drip down and stain the couch, much less make your scandalous activities known to both your parents. he knows he’s going to have to face the reality of everything soon, but for now, he chooses to ignore it, propping himself up with an arm as he takes a look at your tired face that’s still so beautiful even after he basically fucked you within an inch of your life.
“you okay?” he asks softly after a while, prompting you to open your eyes and look up at him. there’s so much love and adoration in them that it makes jay feel all gooey inside, and when you nod with a small smile on your lips, he can’t help but lean back in and kiss you, desperately wishing this won’t be the last time he feels your mouth on his. “you think we made a mess?” you wonder out loud with a giggle once he’s pulled away, and jay just laughs breathlessly at you, brushing a strand of loose hair out of your face to take a proper look. “i’ll clean it up if so, don’t worry, baby.” he reassures in a quiet voice, leaving you to hum in agreement as a response.
“jay.”
“hm?”
“..what now?”
jay inhales when you bring forth the question he doesn’t have an answer to, looking down at you to find your worried expression staring back at him. he coos when you jut out your bottom lip, brushing a thumb against your cheek smoothly as he sighs. “don’t worry about that now, princess. just sleep.” he murmurs.
he can tell you’re not entirely satisfied with his admission, and that you want to say something more, but even if you do, you choose not to, instead opting to follow his advice and shutting your eyes by letting the fatigue from what you’d just been through take over your body. jongseong watches as you slowly close off your thoughts and mind, gently resting his body weight on top of you in favour of pulling you closer. he tries to avoid thinking of the inevitable that’ll come to wake him up, but he’ll deal with that later, choosing to bask in this moment with you for as long as he can before he has to face reality. instead, he presses a small kiss to your cheek, nuzzling it with his nose before closing his own eyes. he eventually drifts off to dreamland, where his thoughts will still be filled with your face.
. . .
comments and reblogs are always appreciated! <3
#✰ sunny's oneshots!#enhypen smut#enhypen x reader#enhypen x you#jay smut#park jongseong smut#jay x you#park jongseong x you#jay x reader#park jongseong x reader#park jay smut#enha smut#enha x reader#enha x you
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I WANNA BE YOURS ˒˒ 최연준͏ ▸ 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗍𝗐𝗈 𝗈𝖿 𝗰𝗲𝗶𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀
after confessing your feelings and not getting the reaction you hoped for, you decided to cut contact and avoid yeonjun. the only thing is that he refuses to let you go that easily and is determined to show you that your two worlds can collide.
pairing ⸝⸝ choi yeonjun 𝑥 fem!reader 𓄵 𝓯eat. ꔛ 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦!𝘣𝘦𝘰𝘮𝘨𝘺𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘥!𝘵𝘢𝘦𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘯
genre ⋆ 📓 ⸝⸝ secret friends with benefits to ??? to lovers, angst, smut, secret relationship, opposites attract, punk!yeonjun, nerd!reader, reader wears glasses, punk x nerd trope, some bad boy x good girl trope, slice of life, college au
warnings ⸝⸝ heartbreak, unprotected sex, soft dom!yeonjun, kinda service!top yeonjun, heavy praise kink, marking, petnames (baby, sweetheart, good girl, babygirl), creampie, multiple orgasms, a lot more desperation and neediness lmao, pussy drunk!yeonjun, body worship, clit stimulation, overstimulation, squirting, fingering, dirty talk, some aftercare
kipo’s note ⸝⸝ hehe here’s part two finally for everybody who wanted it for ceilings!! this is inspired by the songs i wanna be yours by arctic monkeys and corner by sace6!! made it extra angsty for you guys since i know you all like the pain (me too) :3 hehe i hope that you like it as much as part one and that the ending is satisfying! (ʃƪ〃゚3゚〃)♡ enjoy my loves!!!
͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ❨ 9k ❩ ╱ ❨ 𝓶.list ❩ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ︵͡ 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 (⌒‿⌒)♡
you have been ignoring choi yeonjun, you can finally admit to it now. for a week you’ve been dodging him if you even caught a glimpse of his orange hair with blonde streaks.
you knew it was ridiculous, but how could you ever face him with what happened in your room the last time you saw him? the answer: you don’t face him at all.
of course he noticed, you were now actively avoiding him and not trying to hide it anymore. if you happened to be quickly scurrying past him to get to where you needed to be—which for the past week he always made sure to be near—you could feel his heavy gaze linger on you. yet, he hasn’t stopped by your room at all or even sent you a quick text.
there was now this… awkward tension between the two of you. tension that clearly neither of you knew how to address. and you could see it in his eyes, he wanted to say something to you so desperately, but he kept his mouth shut. and so did you. at this point, you were content in never opening your mouth again.
it’s gotten to the point where even his friends have been questioning him.
“do you know her? why are you staring at her so much?” they would ask him. his answer was always the same variation of this reply: “i’ve seen her around a couple times. we have some classes together.” followed by some lie he quickly made up off the top of his head to explain why his eyes were on you. never the truth.
the fact of the matter is that he doesn’t feel the same way about you, so what’s the point in continuing this secret relationship the two of you have? you were in love with him, but he wasn’t in love with you. two puzzle pieces from two seperate boards—you’d never go together. the two of you should just part ways now while everything was all out on the table.
it was a mistake, confessing your feelings for him, but there was nothing you could do about it now but pretend it never happened. and pretend that you never got involved with choi yeonjun.
you pulled the turtleneck further up your neck as you ducked next to where the outside water fountains were, chest rising heavily as your eyes darted to the side. you hoped yeonjun didn’t see you. sighing to yourself softly, you pulled your phone out and checked the love bites on your neck. they were almost faded now, but every time you looked at them you can’t help but think of that night and a sharp pain erupts in your chest.
you moved to leave before you were suddenly cornered against the brick wall of the campus building you ducked behind. you smelt his familiar cologne before you saw his face and dyed hair. “we have to talk. you can’t keep avoiding me.”
your heartbeat suddenly picked up and you quickly swallowed down the lump forming in your throat. “we have nothing to talk about,” you replied, eyes locked on the band tee he was wearing.
it was a lie, you knew that. you knew that at some point the two of you had to talk about your confession, but you desperately wished he would just let it go and pretend like it never happened like you were.
“don’t bullshit me, y/n,” yeonjun countered, leaning into your ear.
you eyes traveled up to the skull necklace you have gifted him. slight surprise coursed through you at the fact that he still wore it—at the fact that he wore it at all. your eyes then locked on his and you gathered all the firmness you could to add to your stare.
“you clearly don’t feel the same way that i do, yeonjun. let’s just leave it at that.” as you spoke, a small group of students passed by the corner you both were tucked in. yeonjun frantically backed away from you and checked your surroundings, eyes darting from place to place.
you scoffed to yourself. how ridiculous. “you don’t even want to be seen in public with me,” you continued, deep hurt creeping in the edges of your voice.
yeonjun’s eyes darted back to yours and he quickly stepped towards you. “it’s complicated,” he said.
“it’s… complicated...” you shook your head at him in disbelief as you slowly repeated his words, words growing in volume as you went on. “it isn’t, yeonjun. it really isn’t. trigonometry is complicated, this is—”
“i want to be with you,” he interrupted, voice just above a whisper, and grabbed your hands in his. yeonjun’s face was pleading, and almost desperate, but you were done. you were done being second choice to whatever he put ahead of you.
for months you were with him in the four corners of your room and you didn’t share a single complaint as long as the two of you were together. but now that he didn’t even want to be seen with you where others could possibly see, you were done.
you snatched your hands from his and yeonjun’s eyebrows shot up. “in secret! without any strings attached—but i can’t keep doing this with you. i can’t be with someone who only wants to be with me in private, who doesn’t want to be with me at all. i won’t allow myself.”
as you were pouring your everything onto the floor in front of yeonjun, you watched as he still glanced around the two of you, making sure that nobody was listening to your words. in real time, you felt your heart crack and shatter into a million pieces. all you could do was sigh defeatedly.
you turned towards the building you were originally heading for, no doubt late for the class you were supposed to be at, and began walking off. you felt yeonjun’s hand wrap around your wrist and pull you back.
your mouth opened in protest but the sound was quickly smothered as his lips smashed onto yours. you froze, heartbeat racing even further. hate sunk deep into the pit of your stomach. you hated how you melted into his touch and how your heart beat so fast it felt like it might explode. you hated how good his lips felt on yours—how familiar they felt and how much you missed the feeling.
you pushed him away from you, shock clear on your face as you looked up at him. in the seconds it took you to register that he just kissed you again for the first time after a week, your eyes darted to the side. to the completely empty campus. not a soul could be seen for miles. you looked back at him.
tears sprang to your eyes and this time you couldn’t stop the ones that managed to escape in his presence. you shook your head once again. “it’s over, yeonjun.” you broke free of him, hurt now showing through full force in your voice. “whatever we had… it’s over.”
you walked off, leaving his frozen figure behind you.
pushing your textbooks to the side, you sighed heavily to yourself. no matter what you did, you couldn’t focus—and that was unusual for you when it came to your studies. exams were just around the corner and you couldn’t afford to be distracted.
you removed your glasses and pinched the bridge of your nose. the only thing that stuck in your mind was your last conversation with yeonjun. slumping down onto the table in front of you, you looked around at the quiet library. you just couldn’t understand it.
did the opinions of his friends and strangers really matter that much to him? were you really not enough for him that he just had to keep you secret? what was it? yeonjun claimed that he wanted the two of you together, but he hesitates at the two of you being seen in public together. it made your mind twist and run in circles trying to figure it all out.
if he just wanted to be friends with benefits, why not find someone else? he could’ve saved you both the trouble. and you were sure there would be people jumping at the opportunity of that kind of relationship with him—but, not you.
you put your glasses back on as you sighed again. you hated to think it, but you couldn’t help the thoughts that ran through your head. what could you do to be enough for him?
how could you change yourself so that he wasn’t ashamed to be with you?
did you have to dye your hair a bright color? get rid of your argyle sweaters and longer-length skirts and instead wear darker clothes, more shorter skirts, and listen to the same rock music that he did? sport the frilly black dresses or the tighter, more vibrant clothing his female friends did? be more opinionated and vulgar and really speak your mind?
it was clear that you weren’t retaining any information from your textbooks. you started to pack up, returning books back to where you found them and putting your notebooks back in your bag. you thought over every interaction you’ve ever had with yeonjun; how every moment led you to where the two of you were now. you could only think of one thing.
maybe you and yeonjun were two puzzle pieces from two seperate boards—and maybe you were trying too hard to force yourselves to fit together. maybe doing so has pushed you and yeonjun into a corner that neither of you knew how to get out of now.
without realizing the time, night had fallen around you and you stepped out into the coldness of the outside world. you looked up towards the starless sky.
perhaps the two of you should just stick to what you both know, instead of trying to go outside of the box.
yeonjun twirled the small skull necklace that you had gifted him between his fingers as he zoned out from the conversation his friends were having. he thought back to that night almost two weeks ago now, how you basically confessed that you were in love with him in your room. it still caught him off guard.
at first he thought that you were joking, until your heavy silence followed immediately after. he wanted to go back and say something other than what he did—wanted to kick himself for hesitating. yeonjun wanted to kick himself now for still hesitating.
he wasn’t exactly sure how to describe the feelings he felt for you, this whole thing was new to him. yeonjun didn’t do relationships. but, it was clear that you did. and he wanted you.
yeonjun wasn’t the flashy type or the openly affectionate type either. he honestly wasn’t sure that he could give you what you so desperately wanted from him. yet, he just couldn’t seem to let go of you either. was it selfish? yes. but, yeonjun didn’t care. not when you were slipping from his grasp.
with the other girls he’s been with it was easy. they never fell for him or expected more than the physical relationship that he had with them. they all knew what they were getting and took it at face value for what it was. but you were different—and he was different with you. yeonjun couldn’t explain to himself what set you apart, there was just something about you. all he knew was that he liked the change. he liked the different relationship the two of you had, and he was willing to do anything to keep it.
yeonjun just so happened to glance up as you were scurrying across the campus yard a couple feet away from him. he saw the way that you tried to avoid his stare, but still snuck the quickest of looks in his direction, trying to disguise it as you pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose. the corners of his lips rose the slightest bit. he had to talk to you again, make you see that calling off what the two of you had was the wrong choice.
a finger snapped in his face and his eyes focused back to his friends. “where has your head been at lately?” his friend, beomgyu, asked. he turned, his long brown hair falling into his eyes as he followed yeonjun’s gaze, “and what is it with you and that girl?”
yeonjun straightened as he tore his gaze away from you and brought beomgyu’s attention back to him. “nothing, i was just zoned out.” he purposefully ignored beomgyu’s second question.
beomgyu thankfully turned back to him, his eyes now focusing on something else entirely. “where did you get that necklace? you’ve never worn one before that.”
“uh, i don’t know? some random store i was getting clothes from, it caught my eye—why are you asking me so many questions? mind your business.” he dropped the necklace from his fingers. yeonjun didn’t have time to explain something he wasn’t quite sure of himself, not when he had to catch up to you. “i gotta go,” yeonjun quickly added, pushing away from his group of friends as he jogged in the direction you went in.
behind him, he heard beomgyu say to his other friends, “you think him and that girl are involved?” another one of his friends’ voices piped up. “the nerd? definitely not. she’s not his type.”
“i don’t know…” beomgyu trailed, “they would look cute together. there’s gotta be something happening at the very least.”
thankfully you hadn’t gone that far and yeonjun was able to catch up to you easily. he grabbed your wrist, pulling you away from prying eyes and somewhere more private. you turned in his grasp, looking up at him with an almost defeated and annoyed look.
“this can’t be over,” he started. you looked around before turning to walk away, but not before yeonjun held your wrist again, keeping you in place. “tell me what to do to fix this—help me fix this.”
yeonjun was kicking himself again for not knowing the words to express what he wanted to say. suddenly all the vocabulary he’d ever fucking learned disappears when he tries to talk to you and he ends up a bumbling mess.
“help you fix this?” you repeated.
yeonjun nodded, “yes. i wanna be with you—i wanna be yours. if you want a relationship, then we can have one.”
you tilted your head to the side and adjusted your glasses as you looked at him. “so if i were to go up to your friends with you right now and introduce myself as your girlfriend you wouldn’t have a problem with it?” you asked him, glancing back to the direction yeonjun came from mere moments before. yeonjun hesitated, stammering over his words. his tongue felt too heavy in his mouth.
you just scoffed to yourself at him. “you still don’t get it,” you said. “i don’t want to be another girl that you hook up with—another girl that you like. i want to be the girl that you like. i want to be more.”
hatred bubbled up inside you and threatened to spill over at the fact that you were still in love with him. at the fact that you were still wrapped around his finger to the point that you almost jumped at the opportunity of a relationship. yeonjun was just saying that to appease you—to get you naked and under him again and have things return to the way they were before.
resentment started to build towards yeonjun at the secrecy. it was a lot easier to blame him for how your relationship went up in flames instead of how flawed it was to begin with. besides, it felt good to restrict yourself from him—to have him stare at you as you passed while you ignored him instead, even if you still missed him and his touch.
you knew that this was all doing more harm than good, but right now you just couldn’t seem to care. maybe yeonjun’s attitude was finally starting to rub off on you and he was getting a taste of his own medicine.
yeonjun’s brows knitted together at your words. “you are the girl that i like,” he said, “there’s nobody else but you.”
you stared at him for a moment in silence. in a melancholic voice you asked, “why do you like me?”
yeonjun could feel you drifting further and further away from him and he didn’t like it. he wanted to pin you to his chest so that you always stayed close—like the necklace around his neck you gave him. his mind raced and there felt like there was sand in his mouth as he raced against the hourglass of time that the two of you had left—and still, he came up empty once again.
it wasn’t that he didn’t have any reasons for liking you—he had plenty—it was just that there were so many that his brain short-circuited. if you just gave him the time and a pen and paper he could make whole novels. but time was running out and yeonjun watched as your face fell more and more the longer the seconds ticked by.
“because of the sex?” you asked, voice raising. yeonjun looked around the two of you before sighing and cupping your face with his hands as he shook his head. something inside him cracked at the way your eyes started to become glassy. “does the thrill of you sneaking into my window at night knowing that nobody would ever expect the two of us together excite you?” you continued. “genuinely, what is it, yeonjun? help me understand.”
glassy tears fell down your cheeks and yeonjun felt himself shatter. he tried to pull you closer to him, to comfort you, but you pushed him away. you shook your head as your gaze dropped to the ground. “you really know how to break my heart in two, don’t you?” you asked in a small voice as you looked up at him, completely defeated.
you turned and moved to leave. yeonjun tried to grab your hand, but the only thing he was able to grasp was the fleeting touch of your fingertips against his as you got further away from him. he stood completely rooted to the spot you left him in, frozen, as he watched you disappear.
suddenly everything yeonjun wanted to say to you crashed into him like a wave, but he was too late. he twisted towards the trash can next to him and gave it an angry and harsh kick, causing it to fly across the grass. students passing by jumped at the sudden noise and looked yeonjun’s way, but he couldn’t care less.
yeonjun buried his head in his hands and pulled at the tips of his hair. “fuck!” he yelled, running his hands messily through his hair. he looked up and saw a couple of students looking at him. “what the fuck are you looking at?” he angrily called out to them as he briskly walked away.
whether you intended to or not, you started to change yourself. your sweaters got darker, your skirts got shorter, and you even started to put on a hint of eyeliner before leaving. when you looked at yourself in the mirror it almost felt like there was a stranger staring back; it was you but it wasn’t at the same time. like you were wearing a cheap costume and pretending to be something that you weren’t.
you withdrawled more and more into yourself, only really emerging to take your exams and to study. you felt so bleak that even the darkness of your clothes didn’t light a match onto the way you felt inside. even your friends started to notice.
“so is this a new look you’re going for?” taehyun asked, his eyes looking over you. you shrugged and finished writing the sentence you were writing in your notebook. “i never even seen you wear black before and… is—is that eyeliner?” he added, moving closer to you until you were face to face.
you made a face and pushed him away. “it’s makeup and clothes, why does it matter to you?” you bit back, tone sharp. you didn’t mean to be so snappy with taehyun, it seemed you haven’t had the patience lately. you shifted in your seat, adjusting your skirt and sweater. the weather was getting colder during the daytime, so you decided to wear some black tights and boots.
taehyun just gave you a look, “you don’t seem yourself—you haven’t been yourself, y/n. what’s going on with you?” you looked back at him with a glare, pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose.
scoffing, you hurriedly threw your things back into your bag. “nothing,” you pushed out, “i am completely myself. just because i wear different clothes and makeup from time to time doesn’t mean i’m not myself.” you stood from the table and threw your bag over your shoulders.
adjusting your skirt again, you swirled to where taehyun still sat, a shocked expression on his face from your outburst. “maybe you should learn to not stick your nose into other people’s business.” with that, you stormed out of the student lounge.
you were heading towards the library to continue studying when your phone buzzed. you fished it from your bag, seeing what it was from. you stopped dead in your tracks right in the middle of the sidewalk. it was yeonjun.
the wall you had painstakingly built up around you started to crack as you read his incoming messages and you felt your knees start to get weak. you were doing so well ignoring and avoiding him, how could you let a simple text from him have all of it come crashing down?
yeonjun: baby. yeonjun: i really need to talk to you.
you have come so far with shutting him out of your heart, yet one little message has all of your love for him flood back into you. why now? it’s been weeks, you were finally starting to try to move on; why would he make you love him again?
it was enough to feel his eyes on you—always on you, no matter where you went anywhere in his presence. you could almost hear his voice in your head with the way he radiated onto you. you knew he wanted to talk to you again, but he held back. it angered you. for once you just wanted him to spit it out, spit out the words hiding behind his tongue instead of always holding back.
you wanted him to fight for you, to show you that he cares about you—you, and not just what you could offer him. not your help with his studies, not the excitement he got from sneaking around with you, and not the sex. you wanted him to hold you like he never wanted to let you go ever again. and if you tried hard enough, you could almost feel his skin on yours again—and damn if you didn’t miss it all.
you heaved in a shaky breath as you stared at the messages. with another shaky breath, you pushed your phone back into your bag and kept walking to the library.
another starless night greeted you as you finished all the work you needed to do today. the cold air nipped at your cheeks and you made your way through the quiet streets back to your apartment.
you pushed open your front door, thankful to finally be home and take some of the stress off your back. you dropped your bag near the entrance and made your way to your room so you could shower the day away.
opening your bedroom door, you froze in complete shock. yeonjun sat on your floor, his back pressed up against the bottom edge of your bed as he idly flipped through one of your textbooks. he looked up at your entrance and his eyes immediately flicked over you. yeonjun flipped the textbook closed without looking at it and tossed it to the side as he stood.
you inhaled sharply, your brows drawing together. mentally, you cursed yourself for stupidly forgetting to lock your window. it’s been unlocked for yeonjun for so long now that you completely forgot about it. you stumbled over your words as yeonjun took a step closer to you. “w-what the fuck?” you murmured.
yeonjun raised a brow at your words.
he took another step towards you and his eyes trailed along your body, taking in every inch of you. “you look… different,” yeonjun said, his eyes finally meeting yours. it almost made you collapse. “it seems like i’m finally rubbing off on you.”
you swallowed the lump in your throat as you stepped into the room. you moved to your dresser and began taking out some pajamas, turning your back towards yeonjun so he didn’t see the way you hands shook. “why are you here?” you spoke. your mouth felt dry and your voice came out almost hoarse.
behind you, you heard yeonjun’s footsteps move closer to you. “i needed to see you,” he replied. “hear your voice again… i missed you.”
when you didn’t respond, yeonjun gently grabbed your arm. sparks exploded from his touch and your heart rate picked up. you sat the clothes on the top of your dresser and tightened your hands into fists. “talk to me, baby. we can’t keep just passing by each other like we don’t know one another,” yeonjun added, his voice low in the quiet room.
you turned to face him, your face full of anger. “what? now it’s too much when i ignore you but it wasn’t when you were ignoring me?” you pushed him away from you and moved towards where your desk was to get away from him. “now that you’re getting a taste of how i feel, it's bitter, huh? it’s rotting you to the core, isn’t it?” you added sarcastically.
yeonjun looked at you from across the room, “it is. it fucking is and it sucks and i’m sorry. i never knew you felt this way. if i did, i never would’ve put you through it.” yeonjun took a couple steps towards you and you held out a hand to stop him. “but, i know now. i know now and i’ll make a million promises to never put you through it again.” you scoffed.
“you bring out the best in me,” yeonjun said, running a hand through his faded dyed hair. “we bring out the best in each other, you know that. and this… this isn’t you, y/n.”
you rose your chin slightly in defiance. “and what if this is me?” you countered. “don’t you like it?”
yeonjun hummed and for a moment he was quiet. you could see the gears turning and turning in his head as he took in your appearance once again, making his way closer and closer to you until he stood mere inches away from you. you watched as his eyes dragged up your body before finally connecting with yours once more. “i like the real you,” yeonjun said.
your little defiant act fell flat and you looked away from him, licking your lips.
“i like your preppy looking clothes and how it makes you light up a room. i like the way your glasses fall down when you’re focusing on something too hard to notice and i have to adjust them for you—i like how you don’t even notice that i do it sometimes.” yeonjun took a small step towards you and your breath hitched. he reached forward and adjusted your glasses for you.
the tips of his fingers grazed over your cheek and you felt the fire light underneath you, making heat spread all throughout your body. you looked at him again, his eyes boring into yours and softening at your gaze. without realizing it, you leaned into his touch.
yeonjun continued, the pad of his thumb dragging along your chin. “i like how soft your skin is, and the way it feels against mine. i like the way i can feel your body heat up like a crackling fire when i touch you and how your heart thumps out of your skin. i like feeling you close to me.” he then closed the distance between the two of you so that you were now pressed close to him.
the heat of his body thawed you completely; crumbled down the walls you built and forced out the feelings you desperately tried to hide. yeonjun took in every inch of your face, like it was one he hasn’t seen for centuries, as he spoke, “i like how when we’re apart, i crave you. i like the way my body reacts to yours everytime you’re near. it’s like you send a shockwave through me and every fiber of my being is alight; like i finally see clearly—and all i want to look at is you. i didn’t understand what it all meant, why you felt so different—why i felt so different, but i do now. i like who i am when i’m with you.”
his lips brushed at the shell of your ear, “i like that we’re different. i like that we drive each other crazy, because then it means that we care about each other. i like you. not some other girl, not this version of you that you think i’d like—you.” yeonjun’s lips were feather-light across your jaw. he was so close to you that if you were to lean forward the slightest bit, your lips would meet. “enough with all of this. let me feel you again.”
yeonjun pressed his lips to your in the most searing kiss you’ve ever had in your life. like you were the flint and he was the steel and your kiss was the spark that set everything ablaze. you let out a small gasp against his lips from the heat of it all. it felt so surreal, like watching lightning strike across the night sky and making it almost seem like day. the more your lips moved in sync, the more lightning there was, the more the sky brightened until it was an electrifying battle between night and day.
your hands moved up yeonjun’s chest as he wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you even closer. if your hands weren’t in the way, you were sure that your rapid heartbeats would be in perfect sync, too. if your kiss was the lightning, your hearts were the booming thunder, demanding to be heard—demanding to be felt.
after the two of you were fighting for oxygen in your deprived lungs, you pulled away just the slightest bit to gulp in heavy breaths. with the last strength inside you, you pushed at yeonjun’s chest and turned your head to the side. he didn’t move far, his grip around your waist refusing to be broken. you could feel his confusion and he pressed a light kiss to your burning cheek.
you turned your gaze to your ceiling, the ceiling that you’ve spent so many days staring at and daydreaming about a relationship that you didn’t have. even with yeonjun’s words, it all still felt too good to be true. it felt like if you were to look over at your bed, you would see yourself laying there, eyes on the ceiling, lost in the world you have created.
storm clouds drifted over you. what if he was only saying what you wanted to hear? what he needed to say to you so you’d lay yourself completely bare in front of him again. you didn’t think you could have the stars come crashing down around you again if you let yourself let yeonjun hang them in the sky for you.
you dragged your gaze from your ceiling back to yeonjun’s confused stare. a pained expression flickered across your face and you tried to hide it the best you could. you swallowed, and barely above a whisper you said, “if you just want some girl to fuck, find someone else.”
you tried to push him away more, but the more you pushed, the more he pulled you back into him. until your chest was up against his and you were flush against his body—and still, he pulled you closer; like the slightest leeway between you two would destroy him. like if he didn’t hold you close you would disappear. you felt the way his heartbeat picked up even more and saw the desperation appear in his eyes as his brows knitted together and he shook his head.
“it’s not like that and you know it,” yeonjun said, his voice matching the tone of yours. “i don’t want to fuck just any girl, i want to fuck you.”
ever vulgar, yeonjun’s words, but you knew deep down that he meant what he said. and you knew that he wasn’t just talking about the sex. his fingers wandered up your sides, cautiously exploring your body on their own accord. your eyes fluttered shut briefly as you inhaled deeply. “i want to feel you, be with you,” yeonjun continued.
yeonjun caught your lips in another kiss and this time you couldn’t stop yourself from melting into his touch. you felt his need through the kiss and you were sure he could feel yours, too. the two of you stumbled backwards a couple steps and you wrapped your arms around his neck to keep yourself stable, your lips never leaving his. his tongue slipped into your mouth and danced with yours.
the clouds parted and one by one stars started to twinkle in the night sky. no longer were your skies starless. it was all too much all at once and you tore yourself away from yeonjun, shaking your head. “i can’t…” you whispered, breath haggard, “i can’t keep doing this with you. not after everything.”
yeonjun cupped your face so you would look at him again. tears welled up in your eyes and you were just so overwhelmed. you didn’t know what to do, didn’t know if you could put your love somewhere where it could be shattered again. not after you were still picking up all of the pieces of your heart.
“so let me take the lead,” yeonjun said. “let me show you how much i want you. how much i need you.”
his lips were on yours again as he backed you up towards your bed. the back of your knees hit the edge and you fell down onto it, looking up at yeonjun with a melodramatic stare. he kicked off his boots and shrugged off the black leather jacket he wore, letting it fall to a heap on your floor. yeonjun then grabbed the bottom hem of your black, argyle sweater and pulled it off of you, tossing it to the side next to where his jacket laid.
“i really do like you, you know that right?” he asked you as he stripped off one of his various band tees that he wore. you nodded and yeonjun nodded along with you. his fingers hooked under your skirt, “yeah? good.”
in one swift motion he pulled off your skirt, tights, and your panties underneath, tossing them carelessly to the side by the rest of your clothes. you were only left in your bra as you crawled backwards up your bed.
yeonjun slowly unbuckled the belt in his jeans. “you really like me?” you asked shyly, pressing your legs together and leaning them to the side. the corners of yeonjun’s lips rose. his eyes sparkled in the low lamplight and it made the smudged eyeliner around his eyes appear darker. “of course i do, babygirl.”
his voice was full of amusement, like you just asked him if the sky was blue. heat flushed your face and pooled at the pit in your stomach. you suppose it was a silly question, considering all that he said to you tonight.
yeonjun pulled down his black jeans, exposing the large bulge in his boxers. “i like like you, sweetheart. i think i’ve made that pretty obvious tonight.”
you inhaled sharply, your eyes trailing over him and the articles of clothing that kept disappearing from his body. he pushed down his boxers and his large cock sprang free, precum already glittering from the slit. he looked back up at you and your heart stopped.
yeonjun got up onto the bed and moved toward you until you were caged beneath his body. he reached behind you and stripped off your bra, lips hovering over your exposed breasts. you felt his warm breath against your skin and shivered.
“i can spend the whole night listing off every little thing i like about you,” he said in a low voice that your ears just managed to catch through the ringing in your ears. yeonjun pressed chaste kisses from your breasts, to your chest, and all the way up to where he placed a kiss on your lips. “but i’d rather just show you instead, don’t you think?”
he dipped his head into the crook of your neck while his hands trailed down your body. you pulsated with need and desire for him, and your hands splayed across his back and pulled him closer. yeonjun chuckled lowly, the vibrations sending waves throughout your body. his hand moved between your legs and spread your wetness throughout your folds before his thumb rubbed circles into your clit.
you gasped, clutching tighter to him as your back arched. yeonjun pulled away from your neck, his thumb still drawing circles, as he looked at you through his dyed hair. you caught sight of the small skull necklace you gave him resting against his collarbones. even after everything, he never took it off. you swallowed thickly and nodded at his previous question.
yeonjun’s lips brushed against yours and he pushed you back onto the bed so that he hovered over you. the necklace you gave him dangled right beneath your lips and every so often you could feel the cold metal against them. yeonjun’s head tilted to the side, “do you want me to list everything, or do you want me to fuck you instead?”
your mouth opened but no words came out, only a small moan as your hips lifted towards his hand. yeonjun hummed, stopping his movements and you almost whined at the loss of friction. “what’s it gonna be?” he asked, pretty lips attaching to your neck with open-mouthed kisses before nipping at the soft skin to leave marks in his wake.
“p-please,” you begged, lifting your hips towards his hand again in a desperate attempt for friction. “please fuck me.”
yeonjun smiled against your skin and his thumb finally continued to circle the sensitive nub. you whimpered at the sudden contact, wrapping your legs around his waist. “good girl,” yeonjun praised. he reached for one of your pillows and had you lift your hips so he could place it under them.
he grabbed his cock, stroking it along your wet folds. “because tonight, you’re all mine. and i like keeping you all to myself. i don’t like sharing.”
yeonjun pushed into you with a low grunt and you swear you felt him deeper than you ever have before. you gasped loudly at how you could feel all of him inside you and how full it made you feel. it felt like the two of you finally fit together—no longer were you both forcing each other into a board you didn’t belong to. now, there was a whole new puzzle board, one to which you both belonged.
with a slow starting pace, yeonjun thrusted into you. “how’s that, baby? does that feel good?” the wet sound of his cock dragging in and out of you and the slight slap of skin hitting skin put you in a frenzy and turned you on even more. you moaned loudly as you nodded.
“you’re taking me so well,” yeonjun said, hands grabbing your hips and pushing them down into the pillow. he increased his pace, the lewd sounds growing louder with every thrust. “gonna fuck your pretty pussy full of my cum and make you feel so good you’ll be crying my name for the rest of the month.”
his hands on your hips prevented you from rolling them up towards him, but it didn’t stop the way you back arched off your sheets. loud moans fell from your parted lips and yeonjun leaned down you kiss you, cock still thrusting into you. you moaned against his mouth from the waves of pleasure coursing through your body. “don’t stop,” you breathed, arms wrapping around his neck.
“trust me, i don’t intend to,” yeonjun said huskily. a moan parted from him and you could feel the rope in your stomach tighten. “your pretty little pussy is gonna stay wrapped around my cock all night.”
you hands pulled at the tips of his hair as you clenched down hard against him. yeonjun pulled away from your lips, a whimper leaving his mouth as he looked down between your bodies. “fuck,” he muttered in a low whine and his hands moved up your body and to your breasts. he grabbed at them as you rocked your hips upwards.
you were a whimpering mess underneath him, and if he wasn’t making you feel so good right now you’d be a bit embarrassed by how desperate you felt clawing at his skin and pulling at his hair. your body moved on it’s own as you tried to gain the most pleasure that you possibly could. your head dug into your pillow and your back arched so high that there was no need for the pillow underneath your hips because you were practically floating.
“please…” you trailed, eyes rolling backwards briefly as heavy breaths pushed past your lips. you were so, so close. you felt so good that you could see stars again.
“shh, shh, shh,” yeonjun shushed you, his face in your neck leaving soft kisses. “i got you, baby. just let go.”
with one perfectly timed roll of your hips your body shook as the rope inside you snapped. you cried out as your release started to pour out of you and leave a white ring around yeonjun’s cock. he groaned at the sight, still thrusting into you, and your body felt limp and heavy. you started to squirm and yeonjun moved your legs from his waist and pinned them to your chest.
“shit, look at how pretty,” he almost laughed as he watched his cock disappear inside of you and reappear covered in cum. “and it’s all for me. my good girl, you made such a mess.”
your skin slapping against his, sticky with cum, sent you over the edge. you were torn between wanting more of him and wanting to push him away from all the overstimulation. it was all too much and you dug your fingers into your blanket. “jjunie,” you cried out in a gasp, your tongue heavy in your mouth, “c-can’t…”
yeonjun fucked deeper into you, amazed at your glistening pussy and your arousal for him. he hit just the right place that had you crying out more for him. he firmly held onto the back of your knees that were pressed to your chest as he trailed his gaze up your body. “just a little more, sweetheart. you can handle it.”
he threw his head back, his eyes fluttering closed, as he completely lost himself in you. you were taking him so good he never wanted to leave. all he wanted was to keep you like this, his hard cock buried deep inside of you as he pulled orgasm after orgasm from your shaking body. he wanted to fill you up with so much of his cum that it flowed like a river out of you when he did finally pull himself out. you were everything he wanted—everything he needed, and more. and he never wanted to let you go ever again.
yeonjun buried himself completely inside you, barely pulling out before trying to bury himself deeper into you. he moaned loudly as he looked down at your spent body, you were fucked out of you pretty little mind and he was close to it. white ropes of cum shot inside you until it had no choice but to squeeze out from around yeonjun’s thick cock. yeonjun blissfully exhaled, his firm grip on you loosening.
leaning towards you, he fixed your crooked and slightly fogged up glasses that fell down your nose bridge. yeonjun’s chest rose and fell heavily as he smiled at you, kissing you deeply. “good, babygirl. you did very good for me,” he murmured before pressing his lips to the sensitive marks he left on your skin. you felt his smile when you shivered slightly. “do you feel good?”
you felt as he shallowly thrusted into you, the tip of his cock hitting that sweet spot again. your voice caught in your throat as you clung to him and nodded. you felt your legs shake even more. yeonjun just chuckled, his nose dragging along your jaw before he pulled away. “good. let me make you feel even better.”
yeonjun slowly pulled out of you, watching the way his cum spilled out of your spent cunt and down the curve of your ass. he took his thumb and pushed it back into you, eyes twinkling. you whined from his actions and squirmed to the side but yeonjun held you in place.
suddenly, he buried two of his fingers into you. you gasped, “can’t t-take anymore!” your eyes screwed shut. yeonjun pumped his fingers inside you at a rapid pace and held your body in place with his other hand. “do you want me to stop?” he asked as his fingers curled inside you.
you cried out, voice almost a hoarse scream as you quickly shook your head. “n-no!” yeonjun hummed in satisfied response.
loud, squelching sounds bounced off the walls of your room from your wet pussy. you felt like you were gonna black out the closer yeonjun’s fingers brought you to another orgasm. you shook so hard and moaned so loud that it felt like your body had a mind of its own. suddenly, your brows drew together and you tried to quickly push yeonjun away from you.
it was too late. liquid sprayed from you and all over yeonjun. your body went limp as you went from shaking all over to trembling. yeonjun froze, his fingers still inside of you. you didn’t even have the energy to be embarrassed at the fact that you just squirted all over him.
yeonjun’s eyes were wide as they trailed over your body. then his face brightened into a prideful and smug expression, the corners of his mouth raising. “fuck, baby, that was so hot.” he was practically beaming as he pulled his fingers from you, hand completely wet. you whimpered at the loss, eyes closing.
he wrapped his hands around your back and pulled you up. “come on, babygirl. let’s get you cleaned up before i make you do that again.”
after getting you and your sheets all cleaned up, the two of you laid in your bed—half naked—as your lips moved in sync in a slow kiss. you were basically pinned to yeonjun and the more the two of you kissed, the closer he pressed you against him. you both didn’t even realize that it had been hours and it was already deep into the night until it clicked in your brain that you had a busy schedule tomorrow.
you didn’t want to say anything, though, because that meant that yeonjun would leave soon. you didn’t want him to go. you were afraid that if he did the illusion would be shattered—that none of what happened tonight was actually real and you made it all up in your despairing sadness.
it seemed that yeonjun remembered, unfortunately. he pulled away from your lips, moving the two of you so that you had some space and weren’t pinned to him anymore. “i gotta go, baby.” his face showed that he wanted to do anything but that.
he sat up and moved to stand, but before he could you grabbed his wrist. with a look full of sorrow and desperation, you said, “stay… don’t go.”
yeonjun paused and looked back at you—really looked at you. he saw all the cracks inside you that he caused, every single last one. he saw the glassy tears start to form in your eyes.
he was determined to mend them all—determined to make you whole again.
yeonjun turned back towards you, nodding. he leaned down to take off your glasses and sat them on your nightstand. he then reached over to your lamp and shut it off, basking the two of you into darkness. then, he climbed back into the bed with you and pulled you close to his chest.
in the morning, you woke up before he did. sunlight filtered through your blinds and made his orange hair look even more bright and saturated. gently, you reached up and took on of the blonde streaks between your fingers before dropping it and moving closer to him.
you were shocked that yeonjun was still here in the bed next to you, that this wasn’t all a dream like you thought it was. he was actually here with you. you heart fluttered in your chest and all you could do was stare adoringly at him.
you didn’t realize that you must’ve been staring for a while because suddenly yeonjun’s sleepy voice filled your ears. “i can feel you staring,” he said groggily.
embarrassment filled you, but you just couldn’t tear your eyes away from him. yeonjun cracked an eye open before his face scrunched together from the bright light of the sun. “god, why is it so fucking bright in here?” he complained.
you giggled at his reaction and his arms snaked around you and pulled you to him. yeonjun buried his face into your neck to shield himself from the sunshine. “you should probably get use to the daylight,” you smiled, “‘cause i think we’re late for our morning classes.” yeonjun just groaned.
he peeked his head out to look at you. “hey…” he trailed off, eyes darting away from you hesitantly. you furrowed your brows. “yeah?” you replied.
yeonjun inhaled sharply and it looked like he was trying to find the right words to say. “i should’ve said it earlier—should’ve said it that night. but… i just didn’t know what it all meant.” you looked at him confused, urging him to go on. yeonjun sighed and turned away from you to dig the heels of his palms into his eyes. he then turned back to you, brows drawn together. “i… i don’t just like you,” he started it, “i’m in love with you.”
your eyes widened and your heart soared out of your chest. you couldn’t help the smile that formed on your face. “really?” you asked, voice small. “you’re not just saying that?”
yeonjun fully turned back to you and cupped your cheek with his hand. he nodded, “i mean it. i’m not just saying it just to say it.”
you searched his eyes for a moment, looking for any hint of a lie but all you saw was sincerity. you then moved forward and pressed your lips to his. “well, you already know how i feel…” you trailed, pulling away from his lips ever so slightly.
yeonjun laughed, “i do.” his lips met your again and it was everything you ever needed. never again did you want another starless night, not when yeonjun makes your skies so full of stars.
you were leaving your class and crossing the campus when a hand intertwined with yours. you looked over and yeonjun smiled down at you, walking alongside you. you were still a little shocked at the public display despite the fact that it’s been a couple of days.
yeonjun pressed a kiss to your cheek. “walk with me?” he asked. “i want you to meet my friends.”
you both slowed to a stop and you looked at him with wide eyes, causing him to laugh. “they’re cool, i promise!” you looked around nervously. what if after all of this they didn’t like you? that yeonjun was right to initially keep your—then—secret relationship from them? you sighed, nodding a little, “o-okay…”
he pulled you in a different direction and in the distance you saw a small group of people hanging around. your heart thumped more and more the closer you got to them. when you stood in front of them, hand in hand with yeonjun, you gave them a nervous smile. “guys, this is my girlfriend, y/n,” yeonjun introduced you.
you smiled and waved awkwardly. all of their faces lit up, which you weren’t expecting. yeonjun’s friend with long brown hair half covering his eyes gave you a triumphant smile and held out a stripped arm warmer covered hand to one of the other boys. “i called it! you owe me forty bucks!” the other boy grumbled as he dug into his bag.
one of the girls stepped up to you and yeonjun, mostly smiling at you. she wore a black, frilly dress and had on stark black and white makeup. “i knew this months ago!” she said and her eyes darted towards yeonjun. you both gave her a confused look. “you weren’t exactly subtle with all the sneaking around you were doing,” she said to yeonjun. “you literally couldn’t take your eyes off her no matter how hard you tried. like a puppy waiting for it’s owner to come back home.”
you and yeonjun glanced at each other with wide eyes.
yeonjun awkwardly laughed at being exposed and pulled you into his side. he looked down at you and you could see the slight embarrassment in his eyes as you raised an eyebrow at him. “ignore her,” he said, waving a hand in the air. “i don’t know what she’s talking about.”
“like a puppy waiting for it’s owner,” you repeated slowly, amused. “you didn’t tell me you missed me that much!”
“oh, i like her!” the girl said. you smiled at her and she linked your arm with hers and pulled you away from yeonjun, introducing you to more of the group. you looked over your shoulder at yeonjun, who was getting teased by his friends, just as he looked up at you. he gave you a fond smile.
he was so not living all of this down.
∿ [ continue on to . . . part one , masterlist , taglist ] ︵͡ 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 (⌒‿⌒)♡
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#﹙🗒️﹚i wanna be yours ⋆ ˊ𝜗𝜚#k-labels#yeonjun smut#yeonjun x reader#txt smut#txt x reader#txt angst#yeonjun angst#yeonjun hard hours#kpop x reader#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#yeonjun#choi yeonjun#txt yeonjun#choi yeonjun x reader#txt fluff#tomorrow x together#tomorrow x together imagines#txt#txt imagines#txt scenarios#yeonjun fluff#yeonjun oneshot#yeonjun imagines#yeonjun scenarios#txt taehyun#txt soobin#txt hueningkai#txt beomgyu
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⌞ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐈 𝐘𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐉𝐔𝐍 ⌝
DREAM RECALL ⸝⸝ He pulls away from you with a perplexed expression. Then he laughs, it’s short, cruel, he shakes his head. “Don’t be funny”, he mutters as he runs a hand through his dark hair. “You know I have a girlfriend, nerd.” He spits the words out like the venomous bite of a snake. His gaze drops to your unbuttoned blazer, briefly passing the harsh bruises on your chest. — “Don’t think you’re anything else besides a quick fuck.” ⸝⸝
wc ➘ 26k
pairings popular/bully!yeonjun x nerd!reader(fem) college au ! warnings heavy bullying, violence, exploitation, cheating, drinking, yeonjun is an asshole for 80% of this, redemption arc, some angsty scenes, hurt-comfort sort of? this fic contains 3/4 descriptive smut scenes which include — oral (both f & m), penetrative sex, vaginal fingering, a handjob, lots of degrading (reader receiving) but also a splash of praise, some tit groping, implied marking, very soft sex at the end (yeonjun cries a little), reader is inexperienced = virginity loss, + yeonjun teaching her how to give a blowjob as always lmk if I missed any!
#serene adds ✎ my god this fic has taken literal years off my life. But I could not have been happier with the outcome of it !! It's a long one, but I've tried to keep it interesting throughout it all for a lighter read. I'm not one to beg for feedback, but I will actually get down on my knees this time around. Please please comment/reblog or even send asks with your thoughts on it, I need it to be perceived in any way possible !! hehe please enjoy because I have slaved to get this done (if anyone notices the Skins reference in one scene, lets kiss)
(I was also slightly delirious when I read this through ahem...) anyway, ready, set go !
You don’t exactly know how it started. The cheating, the lying, the sleepless nights, the crying, the heartbreak, Choi Yeonjun. One day he was just…there. You had never met anyone like Yeonjun before yet you knew hundreds of people like him. He was everything, he was the cause of your pain, your tears, your self loathe. — But mostly importantly, Yeonjun was your first love. You would always remember him as that. You suppose it might have started on your first day at that college, back when you were only known as the junior transfer.
He was a senior. Perhaps it was a bit cliché, you don’t know, you didn’t think so. But you remember it clearly, the first time you saw him. — The air was hot, suffocatingly so, despite it being early October. Your palms were sweaty, and you squeezed them together as your hands remained neatly clasped in front of you. The eyes of the other students weighed a ton and you felt your knees buckle under the pressure.
Your professor clears his throat as he steps up beside you, gazing out across the classroom. “We have a new student today”, he announces what was already painfully obvious and you felt your cheeks redden further. Apart from a few sniggers here and there, silence follows. “Why don’t you introduce yourself?” His direct question made you flinch as you quickly glanced up from the floor, your gaze flitting between your professor and the large ocean of heads turned in your direction.
Your introduction was meek, the words getting caught in your throat as you stammered out your name. You could almost hear the smirks plastered on their faces as they drank in your fidgety frame. You jump when you feel your teacher's hand on your shoulder, “your new classmate is a year younger than you guys, but due to her impressive work ethic she has finished the majority of her classes already. She will therefore be joining us for the time being.” — His words of praise felt more like a set up for humiliation and you watched as students leaned over to whisper in each other’s ears, grinning at the words being passed around. You could hear the rumors already.
“Why don’t you take the seat over there?” Your new professor points to an empty desk by the very back and you breathe out a small sigh of relief, glad to be shielded from the peering eyes of your new classmates. But just as you’re about to step down and make your way toward the safe haven, you lock eyes with him. — Part of his face was shielded by his dark hair but you could clearly make out his brown eyes, staring right back at your own. He’s quick to catch on to your stare and you watch as his lips stretch into a menacing smirk.
Forcing yourself to look away, you grab onto your bag as you quietly make your way past the many rows of desks. An outstretched foot makes you stumble forward and you barely manage to catch yourself. “Careful”, one of the girls turns in her seat as she eyes you with a not so friendly smile, “wouldn’t want you to fall.” You give her a small nod as you hurriedly continue toward your own desk.
Thankful to have stepped away from the spotlight, you lean back as you let out a small breath. But it wasn’t enough. As class went on you continued to catch the multiple glances thrown your way, the small chuckles, the papers being passed around. It all felt too familiar, and your heart slowly sank. — You pushed the feeling away, focusing on what you did best, studying. Class was a nice distraction, but after an hour and a half it came to an end. And as soon as your professor had shut the door behind him, chaos erupted.
The scraping of chairs against the stone floor filled the classroom as students turned to get a glimpse of you. It didn’t take long for a small half circle to form around you, and you swallowed the lump in your throat.
“How did you do it?”
The first one to speak up was a lanky guy, he leans closer as he studies your uncertain face. Before you could even process the meaning of his question, a girl interrupted him, the same one who had tried to trip you over at the beginning of class. “I bet she slept with them, I mean, she must have.” — Her statement is followed by laughter as people nod in agreement. “But how did you get them in bed?” Another girl asks as she looks you up and down with distaste, “surely it wasn’t whilst looking like that?” More laughter.
Your face might as well have been on fire as you glanced down toward your notes. “What if she drugged them?” Another guy chimes in as he points an accusing finger toward you. Hurriedly you shake your head as your lips part in a reply, a reply that immediately gets stuck in your throat as you’re interrupted.
“You guys are being too harsh.” Another voice speaks up, everyone falls silent and soon the crowd parts as the guy you had made eye contact with earlier steps through. He’s followed by two of his friends and the small group stops by your desk. “It’s obvious you guys”, he exclaims as he leans down to come eyelevel with you. When this close, his sharp eyes somehow felt like daggers, boring into your soul as his lips curled into a smirk.
“She’s a nerd.” He draws out each syllable like it was his last, his lips stretching wider as he sees your face fall. Small gasps and hums of agreement fill the silent room, as if everyone just instantly agreed with whatever he said. “Don’t think of her as anything else”, he drawls, straightening his back once more as he stares you down.
You soon found out that his name was Choi Yeonjun.
⸝⸝
Your first day had only proven to be a small trial of the school year ahead. Word had quickly spread of the transfer student who took classes with the seniors, and wherever you went, you had eyes on you. — You tried your best to keep to yourself, to focus on your studies. That was how you had made it through your previous schools. But it seemed futile here, because no matter how low of a profile you kept, they always found a reason to pick and pull at you.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing nerd?” She yells as she shoves you against the red lockers and you groan in pain. You couldn’t remember her name, but you knew that she was a senior too, she sat two rows ahead of you and to the left. — Confused, you look up only to be met with a harsh slap to your face. “Don’t play stupid, I know that’s the last thing you are.” She sneers and your lips part in objection, though no words come out.
The girl signals for her friends to block either side of you, shutting off any escape routes as she rolls up her sleeves. “You think you can just go through my shit like that? That I wouldn’t know?” Her statement baffles you and your eyes widen, “what?” Another slap to your cheek, “right, come on now. Give it back.”
You frown, “give what back?” Her friends on either side of you grip onto your arms and you wince as they twist your limbs. She scoffs, “my lipstick you idiot, I know it was you. Who else would take it? Besides, I’ve seen the way you eye it whenever I put it on.” — While her words were partly true, you did think that her lipstick was really pretty and often found your gaze lingering whenever she picked it up from her bag, you would never stoop to such a level as stealing.
“I didn't steal your lipstick”, you croak out and she lets out a huff of disbelief. She goes off on yet another rant but you’re suddenly distracted as your eyes land on the small group of students walking by.
After your first day, Yeonjun hadn’t addressed you once. He never picked on you, never engaged in gossip about you, he barely even acknowledged your existence. But you knew that he was behind most of what happened to you, because everyone listened to Choi Yeonjun. If he didn’t like what was going on, he would put an end to it, but he never did.
You often saw him in the halls, he was always followed by his two friends. On your second day you had learned that the three of them were practically inseparable. — To his left was a tall guy, his frame could easily tower over just about anyone, yet he trailed behind his friends quietly with his head hung low. If it wasn’t for the scowl on his face whenever someone dared to glance in his direction, you would have assumed that he was just any other student. His name was Choi Soobin, that much you knew.
To his right, was perhaps Soobin’s opposite. He was shorter than his friends, not by much, but it made him stick out. His hair fell in uneven sections across his face and he often brushed it away with his pinky whilst he spoke. Unlike Soobin, Choi Beomgyu talked almost all the time, with the occasional input from Yeonjun. Though few of his words were kindhearted. He often picked on you, his comments were snarky and mean, you only ever caught a break when Yeonjun got fed up.
Then there was Choi Yeonjun, walking in the middle, he gazed ahead as Beomgyu blabbered nonsense into his ear, Soobin following slightly behind them. The Choi’s, that was what people called them. Something to do with their names all being Choi, you thought it was kind of corny. Yet you couldn’t deny the way your eyes lingered on Yeonjun, just a little longer than the rest.
It wasn’t like you thought that he was handsome or anything, but he was nice to look at…you supposed. And even though you knew better than to pay him any mind, it was hard to tear your gaze away from him. Only when he passed you, did you feel your heart stutter. For the first time since your first day here, he looked at you, if only for a brief moment. His gaze flickered over your practically torn limbs and a small smirk etched its way to his lips. — You felt your knees go weak under his eyes and swallowed hard.
Though his attention soon returned to the girl draped under his arm, the same girl that had tried to trip you over on your first day. You had found out that she was his girlfriend, her name was Mimi. She twirled a strand of her hair as she whispered something in his ear and Yeonjun chuckled. — Their small party continued past you as if nothing was wrong before disappearing down the hallway, leaving you to face the fate before you.
⸝⸝
You convinced yourself that it wasn’t a crush, that you simply found him appealing. The topic of crushes stopped being a thing after middle school, right? You, a twenty year old, have a crush? The thought was ridiculous. But no matter what lies you forced into your brain, your heart still beat a little faster whenever he was present, your eyes drifted in his direction and there was nothing you could do to stop them. — So what if you did have a small crush on Choi Yeonjun? It wasn’t going to harm anyone, it wasn’t like you were going to act on it. He had a girlfriend. Whenever you reminded yourself of said fact, a pang of guilt shot through your chest. You know you shouldn’t feel guilty, but it was hard not to. Most of all you felt guilty toward yourself — guilty for letting yourself sink to such a level.
As October went by, you did your best to stay out of the firing line of your classmates, you kept your head down and did your work. And when there was no work left to do, you spent your time looking at Yeonjun. He really was pretty to look at. — You noted the way he would lean back in his chair, stretching his arms above his head before yawning, his eyes momentarily fluttering closed. Usually, he wasted his classes on his phone, or chatting with Beomgyu, it was unusual for him to be doing any of his coursework. Perhaps he didn’t need to, or he simply didn’t care to.
Occasionally, you would catch your name slipping past Beomgyu’s lips, your gaze immediately snapping down to your book as your heart practically beat out of your chest. But no matter how many times he mentioned you, pointed at you, sneered at you, Yeonjun never even as much as turned his head in your direction, simply shrugging along to whatever his friend was saying.
The only time Yeonjun looked at you was when everyone else did. That one time someone poured milk over you in the cafeteria, or when you got a basketball in your face during gym. Only when the whole school pointed and laughed, only then did he spare you a fragment of his attention. And maybe you did like it, maybe you did want him to look at you.
It was kind of pathetic.
What was perhaps even more pathetic was that one offer you hadn’t been able to pass up. It wasn’t like you could say no to your professor either, right? — “I think there are a few students who would benefit from studying together with you.” You blink up at him as you watch your teacher lean back in his chair. This was why he had called you? To be frank you don’t know what you had expected when he asked you to stay behind after class, but this was far from it.
“Studying with me?” You repeat as you point a confused finger toward yourself. Sure you worked hard, but that was because you had your mind set on doing so. You doubted that your classmates would want to spend even a second wasted in your presence.
Your professor sighs as he pinches the bridge of his nose. “You are a clever girl”, he nods toward your latest test result on his desk and your gaze follows his movement as you swallow. “Not to mention the fact that you are a whole year ahead of your peers.” He then adds with a small smile and you silently thank him, even though you were certain that he could smell the hesitation radiating off of you. “Look, it is not something you have to decide on today”, he begins as he gathers the papers on his desk, “but students like Mr. Choi could definitely use a hand in their studies.”
Your ears perked up at the brief mention of his name, and it was almost embarrassing how quickly your head jerked in the direction of your teacher. Though you did not dare get too ahead of yourself. Shifting on the spot, you softly clear your throat, “Choi…Choi Yeonjun?” Your professor stops to look at you, “why, yes, but you do not have to decide today take the weekend to-”
“I’ll do it.”
⸝⸝
You’ll do it? What a joke.
Your whole weekend was spent pacing back and forth across your room. Teeth gnawing away at your fingernails, your mind wrecked with different scenarios of how that following Monday would play out. What were you honestly thinking, saying yes like that? — With an exasperated groan, you flop down on your bed. Staring at the ceiling, you envision Yeonjun, a furious Yeonjun, or maybe a jeering one, you didn’t know which approach he would take. But surely he wouldn’t be happy once the news reached him, unless they already had?
Briefly you considered calling in sick that Monday. You had never called in sick before, at least you couldn’t remember doing so; recalling the multiple times you had ignored the fever in your body as you marched on to class. Not to mention that time you had the flu and still sat through your three hour long exam. — Were you really considering calling in sick over a mere guy. But it wasn’t just a guy, it was Choi Yeonjun.
Regardless of the situation, you still went to school on Monday. But as soon as you stepped inside the classroom, you could tell that something was different. It was like the air had shifted. And as you made your way to the back of the room, carefully taking your seat, not a single one of your classmates bothered to pick on you. Instead they all occupied themselves with whatever they had in front of them. It was odd to say the least.
In regular fashion, the classroom door swings open during the very last minute as Beomgyu saunters inside. Behind him follows Soobin and Yeonjun, both in the midst of a hushed conversation. You find your gaze instinctively lingering by Yeonjun’s tall frame, fingers twirling your pen mindlessly in your hand. It isn’t until you glance up and find his eyes already boring holes into your own, that you’re suddenly ripped from your trance.
Yeonjun was looking at you. He was actually looking at you, no, he was glaring at you. The realization was enough to send your heart into a frenzy as you swallowed a gulp. His gaze is unwavering as he approaches his desk, still conversing with his friend, but his eyes remain entirely on you. — Sweat builds on your forehead and you grip your pencil tightly. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t find yourself to break his gaze. You knew that you were giving him exactly what he wanted by letting his eyes practically tear you apart, so why couldn’t you pull away?
It isn’t until the classroom door opens yet again that he puts out the fire he had momentarily created between the two of you, his eyes shifting toward board as your professor clears his throat, ready to begin today’s lecture. As his monotone voice fills the room, you breathe out a sigh of relief, glad to be out of his sight.
He had to have known by now, the nasty looks he shot you throughout the day were more than telling. For someone who never even paid you as much as a second thought, it was most unusual for Yeonjun’s full attention to be directed toward you. Even during lunch, you could feel his eyes on you as he sat by his usual table. With Mimi on his lap and Beomgyu talking in his ear, his gaze still remained on your slumped figure as you focused on your plate of food.
⸝⸝
Your professor had helped set up today’s session, but after that you would have to schedule them on your own. You were supposed to meet by the library, at 5:15pm that Monday. — You were there by 4:55. It took you about five minutes to pick a suitable table, not too close to the door, not in a corner somewhere, but also not in the center of the room, perhaps you were overthinking it. Deep breath in, deep breath out. Desperately you tried to calm your nerves as your trembling hands brought out your notebook and pencil case.
By 5:15 you were ready, actually you had been ready for the past ten minutes. The small library had been vacant even when you arrived, you didn’t know if you felt relieved at the fact or not. — By 5:25 you started to think that he might not show up. Out of all possible scenarios fabricated in your way too creative brain, the one of him not even bothering to come hadn’t crossed your mind at all. What would you do then? Accept defeat? Tell your professor? Talk to him in class? Neither option seemed too appealing.
It’s 5:32 when the doors creak open. Hesitantly, you lift your gaze as you watch Yeonjun’s eyes wander across the room, finally landing on you. His face morphed into a scowl and you felt your stomach drop. You notice that he hasn’t brought any study materials along with him and you bite the inside of your cheek. The short breath he lets go of echoes out into the silent library and then he marches toward you. — You don’t have time to think before he’s by your table, the palm of his hand slamming against the wood with such force that your pencils rattle, and you flinch.
“Do you think this is some kind of sick joke?” He sounds agitated, his hot breath searing through his gritted teeth as his nostrils flared. Your once tense jaw falls open as your brows draw together in a confused frown. — “I mean, I knew you had a thing for me. But don’t you think this is going too far?” He sounds almost hysterical as a grin spreads across his lips.
You felt color rushing to your cheeks at his words. Did he know? Could he tell by your small glances? But you thought you were being subtle. Yeonjun seems to be reading your mind as he runs a lazy hand through his hair, “oh come on now nerd, for someone so clever you really are quite oblivious.”
“Did you honestly think I wouldn’t notice the way you eye-fucked me every single opportunity you got?” He sneers, tilting his head to the side as he watches you with a cruel look of distaste. Your lips part but no words come out. So you shake your head, you didn’t know who you were trying to convince, him or yourself. “It wasn’t like that…”
He scoffs, “no?” Suddenly his face is only inches from yours, and you had to force your gaze not to stray down to his lips as he spoke. “Then what is it?” He murmurs, so close that you could almost taste his words on your tongue. You swallow, hard. What was it? You didn’t know, you didn’t want to answer, he couldn’t make you answer, could he?
His grin widens as a low chuckle rumbles in his chest. “No way”, he shakes his head as one of his hands grip the backrest of your chair, easily twisting you to face him fully. His previously cocky expression was replaced with a look of sympathy, his voice now laced with pity.
“Don’t tell me you’ve got a little crush, nerd.” He spits the words out and you’re quick to shake your head, denying his blunt accusations. “I don’t”, you stammer, leaning back as far as your chair would allow you to. — “You’re telling me you’re doing this out of goodwill?” He asks as he tilts his head to the side. He hardly seems moved by your denial, but when you quietly nod his smug face turns into a snarl. “Do you think I’m stupid?”
“What? No, no, no that’s not what I-” You stop yourself before getting another word out, it felt like no matter what you said, you only worsened the already sour situation. Yeonjun exhales, his warm breath slamming against your already hot face. He leans back, taking a seat on the edge of the table as his hands dig into the pockets of his uniform. Confused, you watch him as he silently gets comfortable.
“What do you want then?” He finally asks and you blink up at him. “My number? Is that it?” He wonders as he fishes up his phone, unlocking it as he pulls up his contacts. You shake your head and he frowns, “then what?” — Your lips part and you motion toward the books in front of you, “just…”
“Don’t tell me you want me to fuck you, because that would be pathetic, even for you nerd.”
His statement catches you so off guard that you almost hit your leg on the chair opposite your own. “What?” You whisper, unsure of the fact that you had even heard him correct. You knew that there was no such universe in which someone like Choi Yeonjun would ever view you in that way, so it felt almost bizarre to hear those words leave his lips so casually.
He sighs as he gets up from the table, leaning down to become eye level with you once more. “I mean, I get that you’re desperate, believe me”, he lets his gaze drop to your chest for a brief second. “Looking like that, I’m sure it’s hard to get by”, he hums, and in that moment, you wished for the ground to swallow you whole.
It had been a foolish idea to even consider doing this, even more to say yes. If you had only turned your professor’s offer down, none of this would have happened. Because in all honesty, if this was how Yeonjun looked at you, with such menace and fabricated pity, you think you preferred it when he paid your existence no mind.
“But you’re lucky”, he murmurs before leaning even closer, his breath mingling with your own. Lucky? What a joke, you thought. — You flinch when you feel the light caress of his fingers on your shoulder as they slowly entangle themselves in your hair. “I’m feeling particularly nice today”, he smirks and your eyes involuntarily dart down to his perfectly plump and pink lips. “Besides”, he drawls, his hand moving to cup your cheek.
“I’ve never fucked a nerd before.”
You barely get the chance to second guess his words when Yeonjun presses his lips against yours. Immediately you freeze as your shoulders jerk up and your back curls against the chair. The hand on your cheek moves to your chin as he grabs ahold of your face, forcing his tongue inside your mouth and you let out a small shriek. — He hums against you, his eyes fluttering closed, lips moving on top of your unresponsive ones.
A moment later he pulls back. “You kiss like a virgin”, he states as he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. As soon as the words left his lips, he grins, “but I bet you are.” — Still too stunned to even speak after his sudden course of action, you merely shake your head as you glance between him and the floor. You weren’t a complete virgin, you did have a boyfriend back in high school. Not that the two of you ever went further than kissing though, and even then, his kisses were nothing like Yeonjun’s.
Hesitantly you meet his gaze, swallowing down the nerves bubbling in your throat. “Come on now nerd”, he murmurs as his hands grip onto the armrests of your chair, large arms entrapping you against the old wood. “You’ve done it now haven’t you?” — “You got me here all to yourself, why don’t you use it to your advantage hm?” His eyes gleamed with mischief and you knew better than to trust his persuasive ways. Still you found it hard to do anything besides gawk at him, in utter disbelief of what was currently happening.
Biting your lip, you let your eyes flit down to his parted lips, focusing a little too long on the sheer layer of saliva that coated them. Yeonjun is quick to pick up on the subtle shift in your focus and he chuckles. You clearly see the way he moves closer, but it still doesn’t register that he’s kissing you again until his tongue molds against your own. Despite your initial shock, you try your best to kiss him back this time. You knew that you were probably horrible, but even then, he didn’t say anything.
Your breath catches in your throat when his hand envelops one of your breasts, groping it softly. “Don’t tell me you’ve never had your tits touched?” He drawls, easily noting your uncertain approach. Your silence is almost deafening and the way you squirm when he pinches one of your nipples tells him everything he needs to know. With a small frown he pulls back, just enough for you to see his face. He looks conflicted, tongue prodding against the inside of his cheek as he runs a hand through his hair. “Fuck, you really are a virgin aren’t you?” He sounds almost…serious and you find yourself slowly nodding as you grip the hem of your skirt tightly.
Yeonjun sighs and you hear him mutter something under his breath. His gaze snaps back to you and you can see the shift in his eyes once he settles on a decision. “Alright”, he states before quickly dropping to his knees. Baffled you follow his direct movement, shrieking as his hands on your knees part your legs. “We’ll start slow”, he hums as his fingers dance across the exposed skin of your thighs, your weak arms easily giving up when he pushes your skirt up.
“No need to be nervous”, he reassures you as his fingers hook around the hem of your panties, “I’ve done this plenty of times.” With that, he tugs your underwear down, past your knees, letting them pool around your ankles before his attention shifts to your exposed core. Your legs close in an attempt to shield yourself from his invasive stare but Yeonjun only gruffs out a short breath as he breaks your knees apart once more. — When he doesn’t say anything you grow worried, clearing your throat awkwardly as you shift on the chair. You had never done anything like this before so you had no idea if his silence was a good or a bad thing.
You don’t have to ponder for long as his fingers suddenly graze your folds. The touch was unexpected and you jolted forward as you tried to suppress the surprised noise threatening to escape. The smirk stretching across his lips only grows as Yeonjun basks in the way you react to his simple touch, you were far easier than any of the girls he’d been with. — “Ever had anyone touch you like this?” He asks, his voice a low murmur as his attention remains on his fingers sliding against your cunt, gathering the slick that formed as he smeared it all over you.
Meekly you shake your head, breathing out a small “no.” He seems satisfied with your answer, his ego inflating by the minute as he watches you writher under his small touches. Everything still felt so surreal, there was no way that this was actually happening, was it? You’re reminded of all the times you had watched him from afar, sneaking shy glances at him during class, before and after school, in the cafeteria, where he sat with his friends and…and his girlfriend. The reminder is enough to pull you from whatever euphoric state that transpired within your body as you jerked away from his touch.
Yeonjun’s eyes snap to you with a hint of curiosity and you bite the inside of your cheek, drawing in a small breath before daring to speak. “M-Mimi… w-what about her?” — He groans, a frustrated groan, and you wonder if you overstepped. “Nerd, someone like you, doesn’t count as cheating, got it?” He holds your gaze, speaking clearly, as if giving instructions to a toddler. He grins, a menacing grin, “besides, shouldn’t you be happy? I’m giving you what your perverted little mind has craved since you first stepped foot here.” Sheepishly you nod, heat rushing to your cheeks at the blunt statements he made.
Choi Yeonjun was bold, his words were harsh, and a lot of times they hurt. For some reason that made you like him even more.
“Now stop asking obvious questions”, he grunts as his hands trail along your thighs, pulling you forward on the chair, ignoring the way you squeal when he nuzzles his face between your legs. — It felt far from what it looked like in the movies, or even in porn. Yeonjun's hot breath against your core, his tongue dragging across your folds, it made the hairs on the back of your neck stand and you gasped as he flicked your clit.
It was almost impossible to control the way your thighs twitched, squishing either side of his head as you fought to remain composed. A small whine left your lips as he latched on to your sensitive flesh, licking and sucking on it as if it was the only thing he was capable of doing. You barely register the way one of his hands grab onto your trembling ones, guiding them to his hair as he hums against your cunt. “Don’t be so awkward”, he mutters, his tongue dwelling deep inside of you, eliciting a moan from you as your fingers immediately twist in his dark locks.
Never in a million years had you thought that the study session that you had been far too eager to agree to would turn into something like this. And that Choi Yeonjun of all people would be the first one to see such a part of you. — You didn’t know if it was such a good thing. But it was impossible to form a single coherent thought with him between your legs, mouth falling open in surprise as his nose bumps up against your clit. He doesn’t seem to mind when you push yourself further onto his face, practically grinding your hips on his mouth as small noises of pleasure ripped from deep within your throat. You were thankful that the library had been vacant for hours.
“Y-Yeonjun!” His name falls from your lips without registering in your brain beforehand and you almost slap a hand over your mouth as realization washes over you. Yeonjun on the other hand, only chuckles, the sound sending vibrations against your sensitive cunt and you whimper as he withdraws his tongue from within you. — A somewhat familiar sensation bubbled in the depths of your stomach. It wasn’t like you hadn’t had an orgasm before, but the occurrence was rare, you didn’t exactly spend much time with yourself like that.
His name is pulled from your chest once more and his grip on your thighs tighten. “You got something to say, nerd?” He wonders without leaning away from you, hot mouth working against your throbbing core as he draws moans and whines from you. “C-close..” you mumble, feeling your cheeks redden at the small statement, and you were suddenly glad that he was unable to see your flustered face.
“Cum on my face then, bet you’ve never done that before.”
The comment was mean, possibly even degrading, but it still made you clench incoherently around nothing as you released against his waiting lips. To your surprise, he doesn’t immediately pull away, his face remaining between your legs as he laps up the aftermath of your orgasm, drinking in the taste of you with a small satisfied groan. — And when he does finally tear himself from your sore cunt, you can barely look him in the eyes, ashamed at what had just transpired between the two of you. Yeonjun doesn’t seem affected in the slightest, his thumb wiping away the sticky fluids on his chin before popping them in his mouth. The sight should not have made you throb but it did and you bit your lip.
Without warning, he suddenly gets up as he dusts off his pants. “W-where are you going?” You’re unable to stop yourself from asking. He shoots you a glance that says ‘well isn’t it obvious?’ He sighs, frustrated by your blunt obliviousness, “our session is over, isn’t it?”
You blink at him, still recovering from your climax as you pull your panties back on. “But the study-” — “You’ve got what you wanted, haven’t you?” He states as he stares down at you, much like he had on your first day, and your words suddenly fall short as you meet his gaze. Shaking his head, a small chuckle escaped his lips, “I’ll see you tomorrow, nerd.”
The last thing you hear are the library doors slamming shut before the room is enveloped in a deafening silence once more.
⸝⸝
Everything had returned to normal the following Tuesday. You could barely wrap your head around it. The snarky comments were back, the pestering stares, whatever had roamed the air yesterday seemed to have completely vanished and you were left dumbfounded. — There was only one exceptionally different thing. Choi Yeonjun.
Part of you had hoped that he wouldn’t come to class, but that was a foolish thought. You hear him before you see him, or rather, you hear Beomgyu’s obnoxiously loud voice echoing off the hallways as The Choi’s approach. The classroom falls into a hushed murmur as the door swings open and the three of them enter. — You had told yourself that you would avoid him at all costs. That meant not speaking to him, not looking at him, not even glancing in the same direction as him.
You found it to be very hard. But the shame over what had happened not even 24 hours prior kept your gaze trained to the pages of your notebook. Not even as he pulled out his chair, making an agonizingly scraping noise that cut through the otherwise quiet room, did your eyes stray from the words in front of you, rereading them over and over as you tried to get your brain to register them. — You lasted approximately two minutes.
One small peek his way confirmed your every fear. Leaning back in his chair, Yeonjun paid you no mind as he scrolled through his phone, one of his hands rubbing the back of his neck as he did. He acted…just like he usually did, as if nothing had happened between the two of you. For a moment you had worried that he would tell everyone, that was a shame you wouldn’t be able to bear. But perhaps he was trying to spare his own reputation, you could only hope he would keep quiet. Did he regret it? Probably. Why wouldn’t he?
What was perhaps even worse than his indifferent mannerism toward you was when Mimi greeted him with a kiss. Flinging her arms around his neck, she pulls him close as she practically shoves her tongue down his throat. Beomgyu makes a vile comment before turning to Soobin but besides that, no one else paid them much mind. Except you. The guilt was eating you alive, and you weren’t even the one who had cheated. What would happen if she found out, would she break up with him? Surely she would find a way to put the entire blame on you. You did not dare think of how miserably you would be treated if she found out. It couldn’t happen. You would have to talk to Yeonjun about it, one way or another.
But how?
You tried approaching him at lunch, but you only managed one step in his direction before you chickened out. Then you tried again before English, this time you made it halfway before Soobin swooped in right in front of you, his tall frame covering Yeonjun completely from view and you sighed. Your last shot was after gym. As everyone ventured toward the locker rooms you trailed behind, Yeonjun had, too, stayed to talk with your professor but just as you were about to approach, a tap on your shoulder freezes you in place.
“The hell are you staring at, nerd?” Beomgyu’s voice is filled with distaste as he eyes your sweaty figure, his nose turning up in disgust. Stunned, you fumble for words as your eyes dart between him and Yeonjun, just a few paces away. “N-nothing I was just…” — “Just leaving, right?” He cocks an eyebrow at you and you quickly nod. “Y-Yeah”, you squeak out before rushing off. Why did his friends never stray from his side? It made things so difficult.
You were always the last one to leave the changing rooms. Hiding away in the bathroom, you waited for the other girls to finish before you dared to venture out and get changed yourself. It had become somewhat of a routine, not that it was particularly comfortable, but as it was your last lesson of the day, you weren't in any rush. — Whilst you get dressed, your mind concludes with a ton of ideas to approach Yeonjun. It would have to be when there was no one else around, before or after school seemed like your best bet. The only remaining problem was his friends, who seemed to be glued to his side.
Grabbing your bag, you walk over to the exit as you think of a way to get him alone. But as the door to the locker room closes behind you, it seems your problems have solved themselves for you.
“What took you so long?”
Yeonjun’s sharp voice startles you and you almost drop the bag in your hands as your head snaps in his direction. Leaning against the wall, his own gym bag swung over his shoulder, Yeonjun studies you with an indifferent expression plastered across his face. Your mouth falls open as you peer down the empty hallway, completely at loss for words. “Y-you waited for me?” You splutter as your attention shifts back to him.
He purses his lips as he clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth, “yes, but I’m starting to regret it.” — “Do you always take this long?” His voice is laced with annoyance and you swallow as you shake your head. “I- I mean I…I didn’t know you were waiting I..”
“Whatever, it doesn’t matter.” He waves your meek explanation off as he shifts against the wall. Still confused on why he was even here in the first place, you bite your tongue as you wait for him to speak first. But out of everything he could’ve said to you, you had not expected the next words that were to come out of his mouth.
“When’s our next study session?”
What? He wanted to have another study session? You had been prepared to confront him about yesterday, to tell him, no beg him, to keep quiet. Yet he was asking for another session? You were sure he could read the bewilderment on your face as his lips drew into a grin. “N-next session?” You gawk out as your mouth repeatedly opens and closes. He rolls his eyes before huffing out a short breath of air, “yes our next session, we never settled on a date.” — Well you didn’t think he wanted to, you had planned on telling your professor that the whole ordeal had been unsuccessful but here he was, asking for a redo?
Was it a good idea to say yes? Considering how last time had played out, the answer was probably not. — “I- I’m free whenever.” But you obviously were very bad at listening to your gut instincts. However the smile that spread across his face made it all worth it, you felt your heart speeding up at the endearing sight. “Perfect”, he chimes, “then we’ll do tomorrow 5:30.” You nod but before you can get another word out he adds, “third floor, room 291.”
Would you guys not be studying in the library? Despite your slight uneasiness, you nod, “alright.” — “Make sure no one sees you on the way there, and don’t be late.” He warns before turning on his heel and walking off. You were left stunned as you leaned against the wall, still gripping your bag tightly in your hands as you tried to process what had just happened.
⸝⸝
Wednesday rolls around, the day progresses just like any other would. But something feels different, you feel different. It’s a different kind of excitement, bubbling in the pits of your stomach. You had barely gotten any sleep last night, which was a warning sign on its own because you always made sure to get 8 hours. But you don’t feel tired, not in the slightest. And as the last bell of the day rings, you hurry to the bathroom.
You never fussed over your appearance, far too busy with having a book stuck under your nose. But today felt different, sure the two of you were just studying, it didn’t mean that you couldn’t make an effort if you wanted to look nice, right?
The sound of bathroom stalls slamming behind you shifts your attention to a group of girls passing by. They all stop as they watch you apply a clear gloss to your lips, their noses scrunching up in disgust. “What’s gotten into that freak?” One of them mutters as she makes a move toward you, only to be stopped by one of her friends. “Don’t, you might get contaminated”, she sneers and the small group burst out into a fit of giggles. — Holding back a small sigh, you ignore them as you wait for them to leave before daring to do the same.
Your shoes echo off the now almost empty hallways, it was late enough to where few students lingered behind. Still unfamiliar with the building, you made your way to the third floor. You took no classes here and you had to rely on the numbered doors in order to find 291. It takes a while but soon you’re standing in front of it.
Your hands tremble as you hurriedly glance down the hallway, making sure no one saw you. When your gaze returns to the door you realize that it was a lot smaller than the others, its red paint standing out amongst the otherwise beige ones. That was odd. Yet you push any concerns aside as you reach out to twist the handle.
Upon stepping inside you quickly realize that this was not a classroom. The room was small, crowded shelves pushed up against all walls, displaying a large range of items, from old books to tools such as screwdrivers and wrenches. Your eyes scan across the multitude of contents as your mind tries to piece together the scene before you.
“You’re awfully punctual”, Yeonjun drawls as he emerges from a shadowed corner. You jump as you turn to him with a confused frown, “what’s this?” — He grins, his hands digging deep into his pockets as he leans against one of the shelves, “this is where our study sessions will be taking place from now on”, he explains as he motions for you to have a look around. From now on? But there was hardly room to study here, was there?
Quickly noting your perplexed expression, Yeonjun’s grin widens. “Well come on now, nerd. You didn’t actually think I was planning on sitting down and doing algebra with you?” Your frown deepens, lips parting as your eyes dart between him and the cramped space. “But what…then why are we here?” You ask as you readjust the rather heavy bag on your shoulder. — He chuckles, shaking his head as he takes a step forward, that single step is enough to get him right in front of you, his chest dangerously close to yours. His hand slides up your arm, reaching your shoulder as he hooks two fingers under the strap holding your bag. “Use that clever little brain of yours for something other than your studies, and maybe you will start to see the bigger picture.”
Your bag hits the floor with a thud as Yeonjun’s hand returns to your shoulder, fingers twiddling the collar of your blouse as he waits for the wheels in your head to finally turn. And when they do, you glance up at him, your eyes wide with realization. “Yeonjun I… I don’t know…” Your eyes flit toward the door, mind altering between your options, stay or go, stay or go, stay or–
“Tell me now.”
His voice is calm and his posture remains stoic as he peers down at you. “I’m not about to waste my time on a loser like you if you’re not even into it.” He sneers as his hand lets go of your collar, pushing you back, only slightly, but enough for you to hit the shelf behind you. Was he seriously asking for your opinion right now, for your consent? Choi Yeonjun was willing to spend time on you, with you. The news were hard to melt and you found yourself awkwardly gazing up at him as your mind fumbled for an answer.
“What’s it going to be, nerd?” He tsk’s before leaning forward, one of his hands resting on the shelf next to your face as he cages you against it. Briefly you considered turning back, walking away, to return to your otherwise dull life as you watched him from afar. You remembered Mimi, his girlfriend, the guilt and shame, suddenly it came crashing down all over again. But you also remembered his words: “someone like you, doesn’t count as cheating”. Had he really meant that? If not, why else would he be here right now?
In the end, you nod. “O-Okay”, your voice comes out as a small peep and you curse yourself for not controlling it better. The smug smirk that immediately crawled onto his face should have been a waving warning flag, yet you ignore it, too caught up in the way his eyes darted to your lips, eyeing the clear coat of gloss you’d previously applied. His thumb swipes across the sticky substance. “I was about to tell you not to disappoint me”, he murmurs before pulling your lip down, “but I can already tell that you won’t.”
Your heart swelled at the small praise, and you leaned into his touch. You hear him scoff at your blunt advances, his lips twitching as he eyes your eager figure. “You virgins really are gullible.” — He presses his mouth against yours, making you gasp in surprise as your pupils blow wide. In what you guessed to be an attempt at loosening you up, his hands roam up and down your sides, settling on your waist as he pushes himself closer, grinding his hips against yours.
You had no clue of what to focus on, his tongue in your mouth, his hands on your waist, or the way his thigh pushed between your legs, rubbing against your panties in a way that had you practically squealing. — You knew that he was enjoying the reactions he pulled from you, ever so sensitive to his smallest of touches. It’s not long before his hand is on your thigh, gradually moving along your skin before reaching the hem of your underwear. He pushes the fabric to the side, fingers sliding across your already pathetically wet folds before finding your clit, as if they had done this a hundred times.
The moans you emit are all swallowed by his hungry lips on yours as he lets you grind yourself onto his hand. None of the previous hesitation you had felt during your session in the library was present in your mind, all you could think about was how good he felt, how you didn't want him to stop, and how you wanted more, a lot more.
“More.”
You can feel him smirk against you, your desperate whine ringing out into the hot air. — “Yeah?” He muses before pulling back, his lips are coated in your clear gloss, the sight was strangely enticing and you find yourself nibbling on your own lip as you sheepishly nod. He chuckles, pressing his lips against yours whilst he hikes your leg around his waist, the small adjustment bringing you even closer to him, and as you feel the hard bulge through his pants, reality slowly sets in.
But you can’t stop now, you don’t want to. The sound of him undoing his zipper becomes a muffled noise somewhere in the background as your arms wrap around his neck, clinging to him in every way possible. — He breaks the kiss, confused, your eyes flutter open as you try and peer at him in the dim light of the storage room. You briefly catch him tearing a small package open with his teeth and for a moment you’re left completely dumbfounded before realizing that it must’ve been a condom.
People wore condoms for one of two reasons, either they were avoiding knocking someone up, or they were afraid of catching diseases. But what disease could you possibly be carrying? So that would mean… You don’t have time to ponder on the matter further as you feel the tip of his cock against your folds. Immediately your eyes shoot open as your hands grip onto his shoulders. Suddenly everything seemed very real, perhaps a little too real.
“Tell me if it hurts”, he murmurs, his forehead leaning against your own and you meekly nod. Was it supposed to hurt? You draw in a sharp breath as you feel him slowly push inside, the stretch of his fingers had been nothing compared to this and you felt completely unprepared. His movements come to an abrupt halt as he leans back to gauge your reaction with a wary expression. Quickly nodding, you loosen your grip on his shoulders, breathing out a small “‘m fine.”
“Yeah?” He wonders and you nod once more. Only when he’s fully inside, do you dare let out the breath you had been holding in; feeling your body relax against his. “You feelin’ okay?” His genuine question catches you off guard and you give a small nod of assurance. “Y-Yeah I am..” — He smirks, then he captures your lips in a small kiss, the gesture distracts you from the moment he begins to move, gently rocking his hips into you and you gasp against his mouth.
“Fuck”, he grunts. With one hand around your waist and the other maintaining a steady grip on the shelf behind you, he slowly thrusts inside of you. “Are all virgins this tight?” He murmurs, the question was rhetorical and he doesn’t give you the chance to answer, “or is it just you nerd?” — “I bet it is.” He sounds menacing but his ragged breathing makes it hard for you to tell if he’d really meant it or not.
The items on the shelf rattle as his pace grows quicker, harsher, drawing moans and whimpers from you with every move his hips, cock stretching you wide as you claw against his shoulders. He leans back, enough to where he can watch the way your lips part, your now smudged gloss spread across your cheeks and chin as you whine. His gaze drops to your chest, fingers quickly beginning to work on the buttons that concealed you from him. Flicking them open one by one, Yeonjun’s hand quickly tears your blouse apart, eyes darting to your plump breasts as they bounced in rhythm with his movement.
“You’ve got some nice tits for a nerd”, he muses, his hand groping your chest as his thumb flicks along your covered nipple. Feeling your cheeks redden, you only moan as he draws deeper inside of you, the tip of his cock brushing against parts of you that made you squirm. — Yeonjun made you think of yourself, see yourself, in ways you never had before, and it was exciting.
“Has anyone ever told you that, hm?” He sneers, his hand pushing your breasts together as he watches the flesh squish against one another, groaning at the sight. Unable to form a single coherent thought, much less a full sentence, you merely shake your head. “Well you do. You got some of the nicest tits I’ve ever seen.” He grunts, hips snapping against you. The compliment makes you throb around him, your orgasm approaching at a rapid pace and your fairly short nails dig into his shoulders.
“P-Please”, you wail and Yeonjun rolls his eyes, letting out a gruff sigh. “Thought you would last longer than this, nerd.” — “But don’t worry”, he murmurs, leaning in close as his lips trail the shell of your ear, “it comes with practice.” He moves down your neck, prepping your skin in soft kisses before he pulls it between his teeth.
You whimper when his thumb rubs at your clit, legs trembling around his waist as your hands move to his hair, fingers threading through his dark locks before securely latching on. It doesn’t take much for your high to hit, your cunt clenching down around his cock as it pulls him in further. — Yeonjun curses under his breath as his hips jerk forward before stuttering. In the pure ecstasy of the moment, you roughly pull his face from your neck as you crash your lips against his. You knew that it was messy, sloppy and uncalculated, but you didn’t care as long as you got to feel him this close to you.
You hear him sigh, you can’t tell if he’s content or not. But a moment later he breaks the kiss, gazing at you with a clouded expression as a small grin tugs at his mouth. He bites his lip, eyes dropping to your chest one final time before he pulls out, making you wince at the sudden feel of emptiness. — “Not too bad for a first timer”, he comments as he rids himself off the condom. You open your mouth to say something but he beats you to it.
“Same time Friday, got it?”
⸝⸝
Your study sessions with Yeonjun became a regular thing, and every instance was just like the former. They would take place after school, in room 291, shielded away from prying eyes as he had his way with you. You were there, at his every beck and call, never once showing up late nor canceling. — It was both thrilling and excruciating. You knew that whatever transpired between the two of you was nothing personal and only temporary. Yet you couldn’t help but long for something more; you longed for Yeonjun to like you back.
It was probably a selfish thought, a selfish fantasy. But the images of Mimi flashing before your eyes, which had previously filled you with both dread and guilt, were suddenly replaced with a feeling of superiority. Because even if she didn’t know it, her boyfriend fucked someone else on the side, her boyfriend was cheating on her, with you. And it felt good. Often you had to hold yourself back from letting said fact slip past your lips. The scenarios would sometimes look something like this…
“Watch where you’re going, nerd.” Mimi spits after purposefully crashing into you in an almost empty hallway that provided more than enough room for two parties to pass. Her friends turn to you with a scowl as they fold their arms across their chests. Your eyes dart between them and their vengeful leader before flitting down the long corridor, down to where The Choi’s were hanging out.
Making the mistake of letting your gaze linger, garners her attention as Mimi snaps her fingers in front of your face. “What the fuck are you looking at nerd?” She barks as her eyes follow yours. She scoffs, her lips curling into a smirk, “do you think my boyfriend looks good or something?” Her question rips your attention back as you feverishly shake your head. — Mimi only laughs, her friends quickly joining in as she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear.
“It’s okay, I don’t blame you, really.” She tries to appear nice, perhaps even pitiful, but the malicious intent behind her words linger. You shake your head once more, “no I wasn’t I..” She holds up a finger to silence you, “come on now, it’s obvious. Everyone knows you have a thing for him.” She practically giggles as she covers her painted lips with a hand. Your cheeks feel as if they were on fire, your gaze dropping to your shoes as you bite the inside of your cheek.
“But don’t worry”, she leans closer, her breath, which reeked of the strawberry bubblegum she always chewed, fans across your face. “You’re not exactly his type.”
The statement almost made you scoff. Not his type? Was that what it was? You briefly considered telling her, telling her what her boyfriend was doing behind her back, and with the school nerd at that. The one girl she thought she didn’t have to worry about. It was almost a bit comedic. But you held your tongue. No matter how bad you wanted to crush whatever illusion she had going on, you couldn’t. Besides, Yeonjun would probably just deny it, and who would believe you?
Speaking of Choi Yeonjun. — He had become almost insufferable outside of your sessions. From barely looking at you in class to bringing attention to you at almost every possible second, Yeonjun was now the sole epitome of the bullying you endured. Whether it was the nasty and mean comments he shared with Beomgyu, his words echoing out through the classroom as he brought the whole class to laughter. Or the multiple times in which he’d trip you over in the hallways, undoubtedly peeking up your skirt as he did, but of course, no one noticed that, and if they did, they didn’t fault him.
Choi Yeonjun did nothing wrong. He never did. So when he invites you to a party, your very first one, you don't know what to say.
“Think about it”, he huffs as he zips his pants back up. The air in the small storage unit felt hot and stuffy, your clothes sticking to your sweaty body as you pulled your panties on. “I don’t know..” you quietly murmur, glancing down toward the dark floor as you twist your hands behind your back. — Yeonjun sighs, running a hand through his hair before he tries again. “Why not? Don’t tell me you’re scared.”
You shake your head. “I’m not. But…I don’t know anyone, I don’t… I can’t just show up there.” You argue before swallowing the lump in your throat. It had been an outright baffling proposal on his side. What would people think if you just turned up? — “Tell them I invited you, they’ll let you in.” You blink up at him, was he being for real right now?
“Y-You?” He nods, as if it was a given. “Make sure to wear something half decent at least.” He says, giving your shoulder a pat before he pushes past you and out of the small room, leaving you in the dark once more.
⸝⸝
Something half decent? What was something, half decent? You didn’t know, and it took you about an hour to pick out a dress you thought would be suitable. It wasn’t particularly short, stopping at your knees, the dark purple complimented your skin nice, you thought. But it felt uncomfortable to walk in, and with one hand wrapped around the fabric, you pull it down as you near the driveway of a large villa.
Your eyes flit across the scenery, it was dark out, but the house remained lit despite the late hour. Music was playing, loud enough to where the beat echoed out across the empty street. Swallowing a gulp, you run a hand through your styled hair one final time before daring to step inside.
Immediately you’re greeted by a large number of perplexed eyes, everyone slowly turning to you as you venture further into the villa, reaching the filled kitchen space. “What’s she doing here?” “Did someone invite her?” “I can’t believe she would actually show up.” — You cringe at their remarks, trying your best to ignore them as your eyes scan for Yeonjun. What if he wasn’t here? What if this had all been a ploy to draw you out and humiliate you further. You shouldn’t have come here, you really should–
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
Mimi’s harsh voice snaps you from your small trance as she immediately corners you. Freezing on the spot, your hands curl into fists as you turn to her. Desperate for a way to defend yourself, to explain the situation, or to just escape all together, your mind spirals with excuses. Your lips part but you can’t seem to get a single syllable out. “Come on nerd, I asked you a question.” She huffs, growing impatient as she takes a step forward, her chest almost touching yours.
“I’m…I..” Could you really tell her that her boyfriend invited you? Would she believe you? No, of course not, no one would. You bite the inside of your cheek, eyes flitting across the crowded kitchen. — “Did you come here to make a scene or something? I mean come on, you’re not even a senior.” Her comment makes everyone hum in agreement as they nod, some even sharing a couple of laughs.
She was right, and even if she wasn’t, it wouldn’t matter. You stood no chance against anyone in this room. Tears prickle in the corner of your eyes and for the first time since you came here, you actually felt like crying. Taking in a small breath, you slowly exhale again. “Well I…”
“I invited her.”
Your heart practically froze over as Yeonjun’s voice cut through the tense air. Quiet murmurs carry out through the room as everyone redirects their attention. Somewhere in front of you, you can hear Mimi scoff as she takes a small step back. “What?” She questions and you finally dare to lift your gaze, your eyes immediately locking with Yeonjun’s as he leans against the kitchen island, seemingly unbothered by the small uproar taking place.
Mimi on the other hand seemed to be fuming as she glanced between her boyfriend and you. “What do you mean you invited her?” She seethes, her voice laced with hatred and spite. Yeonjun shrugs as he digs his hands into his pockets, an indifferent look on his face. “Come on now, loosen up a little. It’s our responsibility as her seniors to take good care of her, don’t you agree?” He lets his gaze wander across the multiple eyes directed at him, everyone seeming to break under his stare as they quietly nod.
He cocks an eyebrow in the direction of his girlfriend, “then there’s no problem, hm?” Mimi’s mouth had fallen open as she watched him win everyone over within a matter of seconds. Though quickly regaining her composure as she nods, muttering out a quiet, “whatever”, before she pushes past you with such force that you almost lose your balance.
Yeonjun sighs as he moves off the countertop, placing a hand on Beomgyu’s shoulder, “get her something to drink won’t you?” His friend frowns, “why me?” But Yeonjun doesn’t pay him any further mind as he, too, takes his leave, most likely in search of his raging girlfriend.
As soon as he leaves, the previous tension seems to lift as everyone returns to whatever conversation they had been preoccupied with earlier. You breathe out a small sigh as you wrap your arms around you, leaning against the kitchen island as you keep your gaze down. — A drink is shoved in front of you, it’s reddish hue making you frown as you gingerly take it from Beomgyu’s outstretched hand. “T-Thanks”, you mumble as you grip the plastic cup tightly.
You’re surprised when he doesn’t leave, instead he groans as he takes place beside you, resting his hands on the countertop behind him. “Y’know I really don’t understand why he invited you of all people.” He begins and you can feel his eyes roam your body with distaste. Swallowing, you quietly nod as you sip on the drink, it wasn’t at all as bitter as you had expected it to be, rather it tasted kind of sweet.
“I…I don’t know either”, you shyly mumble, keeping the cup to your lips as you occupy yourself with gazing down at the liquid swirling around. Beomgyu scoffs as he shakes his head, “Of course you don’t. No one knows what’s going on in that thick skull of his.” — His words came out…almost insulting, and you wondered why he chose to speak in such a way about his friend.
“You’ve got some guts though, I’ll give you that.” He states, running a hand through his messy hair as his eyes fixate on something in front of him. Surprised at the sudden almost compliment-like statement, you glance up at him in sheer bewilderment. “Not many people in your shoes would’ve come here”, he adds as he gives you a quick one-over. “No offense y’know, but you kinda look…” His nose scrunches up in what you could only guess to be disgust and you bite the inside of your cheek as your gaze drops to your dress.
“O-Oh yeah…I guess.”
Beomgyu chuckles, “My, are you gullible.” You internally wince at his words, a small grimace flickering across your face as you take another sip of your drink. You can feel his eyes on you as Beomgyu studies you closely, a little too close. “Y’know, maybe I do understand why he invited you”, he sniggers, pushing himself off the kitchen island, he leaves without saying another word.
Left confused and yet again, alone, you chew on the plastic of your cup as you wonder how long you would have to stay before it would become appropriate to leave.
⸝⸝
You think an hour had passed, it felt like three. Back pressed against the wall of the open-spaced living room, your eyes roam the makeshift dance floor as you watch the way your classmates enjoy their evening together. Your presence had soon become old news and after your first encounter, Mimi had left you alone, and so did everyone else. You were thankful, you supposed. But you still didn’t know why Yeonjun had invited you, much less why you had even decided to show up. Because right now, he was nowhere to be seen.
You think that you might be able to just sneak out, leave, go home and forget that this evening ever took place. This wasn’t for you, that much you could tell. You would face the embarrassment come Monday, but today, now, all you wanted to do was evaporate.
Standing up a bit straighter, you tug your dress down once more, preparing to leave. It’s only then he makes an appearance. It’s quick, so much so that if it weren’t for the subtle tap to your forearm, you would’ve probably missed him as he passed you by. Your eyes follow Yeonjun’s retreating frame as he aims for the staircase, leading to the second floor. Before climbing the first step, he throws a quick glance over his shoulder, eyes finding yours as he flashes you a small smirk.
You gulp as you watch him disappear again. Nervously chewing on your bottom lip, your gaze flits across the room, no one was looking at you. Still you wait another five minutes before aiming for the stairs as well. Each step forward made your legs feel like jelly and you steadied yourself against the railing.
The second floor consists of a long hallway, with doors either side of it, reaching down to at least four of them. Your heartbeat picks up at the thought of having to push all of them open as you carefully peeked inside. But your attention is drawn to the third one on the right, slightly ajar as a yellow light seeps through its cracks. Hesitantly you venture forward, coming to a halt in front of it as you debate your next move. Did you knock? Call out for him? Was he even there? Maybe you were seeing things. There was only one way to find out was there?
Mustering up whatever courage you have left, you gently push the door open. The room is… a bedroom. A small onesize bed, pushed up against the window alongside the empty bedside table, tells you that it’s most likely a guest room. Your eyes flit to the armchair in the corner, widening as they land on Yeonjun’s figure, sprawled out against the cushion, a hand down his pants as he lazily strokes himself. He watches you with a faint smirk, his head leaning back against the backrest, eyes half lidded as they peer over at you.
What was going on? You glance back and out into the hallway, afraid that someone, anyone, might walk by. What if Mimi came looking for him? But you were almost certain he’d meant for you to follow him. Quickly you shut the door behind you, locking it for good measure. Yeonjun watches your hurried movements with an amused expression, the hand on his cock unwavering.
“W-What’s all this?” You quietly wonder, willing your eyes to look anywhere but him, anywhere but the hand down his trousers. He doesn’t say anything, lifting his free hand, his index finger beckons you over and you hesitantly comply. Stopping by the chair, you awkwardly clasp your hands together in front of you as you wait for him to break the stale silence.
“You look nice tonight.” He finally says, his voice seemingly indifferent as he shamelessly lets his gaze roam your body, stopping at the slight cleavage your dress provided. In the dim light casted by only a small lamp on the drawer next to him, you were unsure if he could make out the blush coating your cheeks or not. “Thank you..”
He hums, readjusting himself on the soft cushions as his legs spread further apart. It takes everything in you not to let your gaze drop. For a moment everything is quiet, and you wonder why he had even bothered to get you up here in the first place. But then he sighs, the small exhale easily garnering your attention as you shift on the spot.
“Have you ever blown someone before?”
He asks the question as if it were any other and you feel the color on your cheeks intensifying. He can’t just ask someone something like that…But then again, there was little Choi Yeonjun couldn’t do. Part of you doesn’t understand why he even bothered to ask, wasn’t it obvious? Another part of you suspects that he wants to hear you admit it, wants to see you get flustered as you shake your head, squeaking out a meek “no, never.”
That’s exactly what you do. — He smirks, a wide smirk, exposing his sharp teeth as his free hand grabs onto one of your own. You let him pull you to your knees, the soft carpet beneath your bare skin felt nice but it was hard to focus on anything but the bulge in front of your face, the movement of his hand visible through the material of his pants.
“I’ll teach you”, he mumbles, letting go of your hand as he pushes your hair back, gaze wandering across the light makeup you had applied, lingering by the cherry red lipstick on your lips. You slowly nod, hands gripping onto the hem of your dress with such force that you’re surprised it doesn’t tear.
Without further warning he leans back, swiftly pulling his cock free from his jeans as he continues to stroke it, now only inches from your face. Sure you and Yeonjun had hooked up before, in the darkness of the small storage unit, in places where you never paid his dick much attention apart from when it was inside of you. This was the first time you actually saw it, you think, and this close too.
Your jaw goes slack as your eyes trail across the large veins climbing up his shaft, coated in a sheer layer of arousal, seeping through his fingers as they wrapped around the length of it. Gulping, you eye the tip, a bright red hue as droplets of precum spilled from the slit. You would be lying if you said that the sight didn’t make your thighs clench together. — Obviously enjoying your stunned response, Yeonjun groans as he gives himself a particularly harsh tug, making your eyes widen further as they flicker from his cock to his face and back again.
“Come here”, he directs you to scoot forward and you do, offering your hand for him to take as he guides it to wrap around his shaft. He felt hard and heavy in your palm, and you bite your lip as you try to gauge his reaction. Letting his hand drop to his sides, Yeonjun sinks back against the cushion as he peers down at you. “Start slow, don’t use too much pressure but don’t be afraid to touch me. I’ll tell you when you can speed up.” He instructs as he lets his head fall back, getting comfortable as he pays you little mind.
Your attention returns to his cock in your hand, doing as he said, you slowly let your palm glide up and down, fingers quickly becoming coated in the shiny layer of his arousal. You can’t tell if he likes it or not, he gives little reaction as he stares up at the ceiling. You want to ask him, you want him to reassure you, but it feels stupid to ask, and you hate feeling stupid.
His hand joins in on top of your own, guiding your fingers to his tip, which you had purposefully avoided as you didn’t know how to approach it. “Flick your wrist like this”, he murmurs, letting your palm glide over the head before returning to stroke him. He only shows you once before his hand moves back to his side. But you can tell that he’s watching you now, eyes tailing your every movement as you repeat what he had just showed you, rolling your hand over his tip, drawing a small huff of air from him.
“Use your thumb”, he breathes, and your gaze flickers to his face in slight confusion before catching on. The next time you twist your wrist over his head, you press the surface of your thumb against the slit. He shudders under you, a small groan passing his lips and your heart speeds up at the small confirmation you just received. It managed to boost your confidence enough to where you gripped him more firmly, experimentally squeezing his cock, just like he had done moments prior, relishing in the way his breath hitched.
“You can go -f-fuck- faster.” He grunts, his hands sliding against the armrests of the chair, fingers digging into the plush cushion. Quickly nodding, you’re happy to oblige, repeating your previous movements but with an increased pace as your eyes dart between his leaking dick and his slightly contorted face.
When he first twitches in your hand, you’re taken back. Surprised by the sudden movement yet you felt yourself throb as you tugged at him even harsher, wanting to pull that very same reaction from him once more. — He’s stopped guiding you, biting down on the inside of his cheek as he tries to muffle whatever noises threaten to escape. You don’t mind, in fact it only spurred you on further as you flicked your wrist over his flushed tip once more.
His hips buck up against your hand as he lets out a strangled noise. His hand quickly finds its way to your hair, brushing it back as he breathes out through his nose. “Fuck, slow down”, he mutters, tugging at your hair as he forces your face up to meet his, “I’ll cum before you’ve even blown me at this rate.” The statement made your chest swell with pride, still, your hand slows down as you settle back into a more languid pace.
He takes a moment to open his eyes, drawing in a few ragged breaths before he does. The hand in your hair moves to your face, cupping your cheeks as he pulls you closer, the tip of his cock merely inches from your lips and you swallow. “Relax”, he says, fingers pulling your mouth open and you let him. “Breathe through your nose, and don’t use your teeth.” — You slowly nod, your hands bracing themselves on his thighs as he taps his cock against your parted lips, smearing his arousal all over your cherry lipstick.
He pushes inside slowly, you wince at the stretch, your mouth widening as much as it allows. The first thing you note is the salty taste, it isn’t particularly strong and you’re relieved. But no matter how hard you tried to relax your jaw, when his cock hit the back of your throat you instinctively pulled back with a small gag. — Yeonjun tsk’s above you, the hand on your cheeks gripping you firmer as he pulls you back onto his dick. “Thought I told you to relax, no?” He murmurs, letting out a breathy moan as you let him slide himself back into your hot mouth.
Your eyes screw shut as you focus on evening out your breathing, taking steady breaths in and out through your nose as you allow your tense frame to relax under him. “Think of it as the same as what you did with your hand.” His fingers relax against your cheek, thumb grazing your skin as he feels the way his cock slides in and out of your pliant lips. — It feels weird at first, uncomfortable too, but after a while you slowly get used to the feeling of him in your mouth.
Hesitantly wrapping your lips around him, you press your tongue flat against him as you carefully bob your head up and down. He groans somewhere above you and your eyes flutter open as you peer up at him through your mascara coated lashes. Yeonjun always looked good, but there was something about him like this, from this view. A sheer layer of sweat that made his dark hair stick to his forehead, his parted lips and furrowed brows, you clenched at the sight, taking him deeper and with much more urgency.
Something about tonight felt…special, perhaps even more intimate than all your past encounters. Maybe it had to do with the change of scenery. The dimly lit bedroom, the plush armchair, the fine carpet, you can’t place it, but something is different. And for the first time, you can only think about Yeonjun, not his girlfriend, his friends or even your classmates. It was only him.
Remembering how you had pressed your thumb against his slit earlier, you pull back to refocus your attention to only his tip, your hand joining in to stroke the rest of him. You press your tongue flat against his head before swirling it to the best of your abilities, watching intently as Yeonjun’s brows drew further together, a breathy moan ripping from deep within his chest.
“F-Fucking hell”, he groans, his head falling back against the cushion. “Fuck ‘m gonna-” His hips jerk forward, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat and you pull back with a small wince, unprepared for when his hot cum spurted into your mouth. Not really knowing which approach to take, you continue to suck him off, cum dribbling down your chin as you fought to swallow the rest without losing your breath once more. Yeonjun slumps back against the armchair, his hand releasing its hold on your cheeks as he lets it fall to his side.
Carefully pulling off of him, you sit back as you begin wiping your chin with the back of your hand. You steal a glance at him, his chest heaving as he catches his breath. Yeonjun runs a hand through his hair, shaking his head as a small grin etches its way to his lips. — “Was…was it okay?” Your words are barely above a whisper, and he cocks an eyebrow at you, his grin widening.
“Sure it was, nerd.”
You blink up at him, “really?” — He chuckles, tucking himself back into his pants with a small grimace. “Would I have asked you to do it if I had doubts?” He retorts and you bite your lip, no perhaps not you supposed. “You’ll get even better with a bit of practice”, he reassures you, giving your head a light pat before getting up.
He’s reached the door before he turns back to you, “wait another fifteen minutes or so before leaving, yeah?” Without waiting to hear your answer, he unlocks the door and steps out, slamming it shut behind him.
⸝⸝
You spent another thirty minutes aimlessly wandering around the large villa, astonished by how someone could afford a place this big. You still had no clue whose house this even was, and no one seemed to care for the sake either. — Halfway down a long corridor, filled with what you could only assume to be modern art, you suddenly freeze in your tracks as the voices of someone else joins your quiet footsteps.
After spending a rough minute trying to locate the source of the sound, you finally realize that it’s coming from behind one of the larger pillars a few paces ahead. Debating your choices for a solid ten seconds, you opt to try and eavesdrop, if only for a moment. And as you quietly creep forward, their conversation suddenly becomes a lot more clear. — Shuffling to squeeze yourself behind another pillar, you lean against the cool marble as you try and pick up on what’s being said.
You knew the voices belonged to two of the girls from your class, but you were unable to pair them with any faces. — “Did he really?” One of them asks, her voice is slightly high-pitched, almost a bit squeaky. Her friend’s voice is fairly deeper as she replies, “Yes! And it was a week before her birthday too!” A small gasp. “You don’t mean… But with whom?” The first girl asks.
There’s a brief pause, and you, too, find yourself holding your breath as you await the second girl's answer. “With Hera..” You frown, unable to recognize the name but the other girl seemed more than aware as she let out a small shriek, earning a sharp “hush!” from her friend. — “But that’s…” the first girl begins only to be interrupted by her friend, “her best friend.”
Their conversation made little sense in your ears, and with a small sigh you turned to walk the other way when suddenly, a familiar name surfaced. — “But it was kind of obvious was it not”, the girl with the deeper voice begins, “Yeonjun has cheated on Mimi with practically all of her friends. She’s bound to find out some day, it’s only a matter of time.”
You felt your face fall as your heart plummeted through your stomach. Had you heard them right? You hoped you hadn’t but the first girl quickly butts in as she confirms what you dreaded. “I told her from the start that Yeonjun was promiscuous, but she didn’t listen of course”, the girl huffs as her friend hums in agreement. “Better her than me”, she adds.
You had heard enough. That was it, you were going home. Turning on your heel, you quietly dart down the long corridor. — You knew that you didn't have a reason to be upset, hell he had even cheated on his girlfriend with you. It still didn’t stop the tears that pricked in your eyes as you pushed past the crowd in the kitchen. A small part of you had thought, perhaps even hoped that maybe, maybe what he saw in you was different from what he saw in Mimi. God you’re so stupid. You quietly mutter, reaching the open living room just in time to see who you had hoped you wouldn’t.
Near the front door, leaning against the wall, was Yeonjun, arms wrapped around his girlfriend’s frame as she pressed sloppy kisses to his neck. Your mind flashes with the images of what had taken place between the two of you not even an hour ago. Yet here he was, shamelessly buttering his so-called girlfriend up as if he hadn’t had you on his cock moments prior. And to think that you had allowed yourself to become part of his crowd, it was disgusting.
You finally saw Choi Yeonjun for what he really was. A fucking asshole. And with that clarification in mind, you forcefully push past the pair as you march out of the front door, leaving the still lively party behind as you begin your journey home.
⸝⸝
Monday came all too fast. The aftermath of the party is still fresh in your mind as you rummage through your locker. You had spent the whole weekend reanalyzing your every interaction with Yeonjun; from the day you first met to the thirty minutes spent in the guest bedroom just two days ago. You questioned his true intentions, more than twice. But no matter how many hours you tossed and turned in bed, you got no closer to solving the mystery that was Choi Yeonjun.
Slamming the red steel door shut, you almost drop the books in your arm as you come face to face with the person you least wanted to see. — Yeonjun leans against the locker next to yours as he studies your face intently. Quickly you turn around to see if anyone was watching the two of you before shifting your attention back to him. “What are you doing?” You whisper as you watch him with a wary expression.
He only shrugs, a small grin playing on his lips. “See me after class”, he nods in the direction of the stairs, leading to the third floor and you internally sigh. Still, you should talk to him, you really should, so you nod. “Okay.” — His grin widens as Yeonjun pushes himself off the locker, continuing down the hallway without another word.
You find yourself counting down the hours, lesson after lesson, your eyes remain glued to the clock on the wall. In fact, you’re so focused on the afternoon ahead that the insults thrown your way merely passes over your head. — Then finally, after what feels like an eternity, you find yourself walking up the steps and past the doors as you neared room 291.
He was already there, waiting for you. And as soon as the red door closes behind you, he’s got you pressed up against it, hungry lips on yours within a matter of seconds as his hands roam your body. It was easy to get caught up in his world, his kisses and his touches, you have to remind yourself of why you came here. His name falls from your lips, but it’s not the usual desperate whine, it’s serious, you know that he can tell, humming against your lips yet his hands don’t stray away from wandering beneath your shirt.
"Yeonjun, wait."
He stills, if only for a moment, leaning back slightly as his lips brush against yours. Taking in a deep breath, you prepare yourself for the conversation to come. You had rehearsed it many times in your head, but as you glance up at him in the dim light of the storage unit, you find it hard to even look him in the eyes. “I…I’ve been thinking”, you slowly begin, watching the faint smirk that surfaces on his face. “Don’t you always, nerd.” He mutters, his hands resuming their journey up your chest, flicking the buttons to your shirt open as his mouth leaves hot kisses against your neck.
You try to ignore the burning sensation sparking through your body, forcing yourself to go through with what you wanted to say. “Yes but, I’ve been thinking about…about us.” — Your words make his hands around your breasts stutter and he goes quiet against you. Biting your lip, you hold your breath as you wait for him to say something, but he doesn’t, only humming against your skin as he continues to litter you in red marks.
“What makes you think there is an ‘us’?”
His question makes your composure fall as you let out a shaky exhale. “There isn't?" You hesitantly ask, already anticipating the answer you were bound to receive. — He pulls away from you with a perplexed expression. Then he laughs, it’s short, cruel, he shakes his head. “Don’t be funny”, he mutters as he runs a hand through his dark hair. “You know that I have a girlfriend, nerd.” He spits the words out like the venomous bite of a snake. His gaze drops to your unbuttoned blazer, briefly passing the harsh bruises he’d previously left on your chest.
“Don’t think you’re anything else besides a quick fuck.”
Oh. There it was. He finally said it, he finally confirmed what you had been dreading all along. You weren’t stupid, you knew that whatever the two of you had was nothing romantic. But hearing those words come out of his mouth, it hurt more than you ever thought it would’ve. Still, it was just what you needed. With your palms pressed against his chest, you push him back, as far away from you as the small room allowed.
“I don’t think I want to be that.”
Your voice is trembling as you speak and you have to force your gaze not to drop down to your shoes. Letting your hands fall back against your sides, you draw in a small breath, holding it as you watch Yeonjun’s face form into a confused frown. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He huffs, sounding almost angry as his hands clenched into fists before relaxing again.
You bite the inside of your cheek, giving a meek shrug of your shoulders. “I don’t want to be just a… a quick fuck.” You murmur, unable to maintain his intense gaze, you let your eyes drop to the floor. He scoffs, leaning back against the shelves with such force that the items behind him rattled. “Do you honestly believe that anyone else is even going to consider fucking you, nerd?” He was pissed, that much you could tell.
Shaking your head, you blink away the tears that had managed to form in your eyes. “I don’t care, I just…”, you exhale, praying that your voice wouldn’t break as you continued, “I just don’t think this is for me.” — Yeonjun laughs, the same laugh that echoed off the classroom walls as he made fun of you. You realize then just how fucked up your situation had become. How could you have allowed yourself to stoop to such a level?
“I gave you so much, and you… you don’t think that it’s for you?” He jeers, taking a step forward as he comes face to face with you once more. But now none of the previous lust and desire remained, only fury. All you can do is continuously shake your head, not daring to meet his gaze. “No. It’s not.” You state as you tear your eyes from the floor, it takes everything in you to not have your resolve crumbling as you peer up at him.
“So let’s stop.”
You motion toward the small unit you were currently standing in. “Whatever this is, was, let’s end it now.” You swallow, hard, the sound ringing in your ears. Yeonjun runs a hand through his hair once more, tongue prodding against the inside of his cheek as his eyes flit between you and the door. “You want to end things? Fine.” His voice lacks all the anger it previously held, now sounding almost monotone.
“But don’t come crying when you realize just how much you’re about to lose.” He drawls, eyes boring into yours one final time before he pushes past you, knocking you back against the wall as he rips the door open. Darkness envelops you as soon as it's slammed shut behind him, and you finally let out the sob you had been holding in.
⸝⸝
You didn’t go to school that following Tuesday, nor Wednesday. It was the first time you had missed a whole day since your junior year in highschool. Was it pathetic? Probably. Curled up on your bed, you spent the two days in front of your laptop, binging whatever show seemed appealing as you sniffled into a tissue. — You wanted to go back in time, back to when you only knew Yeonjun as the obnoxious leader of bullies from your class, back to when things were simple.
You wondered what he might’ve said about you in your absence. What kind of lies he might’ve conducted, surely he wouldn’t just sit still. You dreaded returning, but you knew that it was inevitable, and as Thursday rolled around, you pulled yourself from bed.
The classroom was empty when you arrived, there was another thirty minutes left but you had chosen to get there earlier to save yourself perhaps at least a few stares as you walked toward your desk. You had missed a lot, you were sure, two days was a long time to be away from school and you worried that you would have a lot of reading to do when you came back home. Though you supposed the distraction of studying would be nice.
It’s about ten minutes left until class when the first few students emerged from the doors, swinging their bags down on their desks as they chatted loudly with one another. “Watch it nerd!” A girl sneers as she gives the leg of your chair a harsh kick, you grip onto the edge of your table as you hang your head low. But beside that, nothing happens, and you frown. You were sure it was going to be worse than this, but it wasn’t. For the first time ever you felt relieved that your classmates were treating you indifferent. Well, all except one.
Yeonjun doesn’t show up to first period. And just as you think he’s about to be absent for the second one as well, the door is pushed open as he walks inside. Yeonjun seldom did what he was supposed to in class, but he always brought his bag, not today though. You tried to not let your eyes linger, inevitably failing as you watched him pull out his chair and sit down, his hands remaining in his pockets as he leaned back to gaze across the board with a lazy expression. In regular fashion, Beomgyu goes off about a random topic next to him as Soobin twirls a pen between his fingers, seemingly bored out of his mind.
Class begins, and ends, and nothing happens. Not even as much as a glare in your direction. It was just like before, before the two of you were ever intimate, Yeonjun acted as if you didn’t exist, and you watched him. But this time, you didn’t feel a sense of longing, honestly, you didn’t know what you felt. Relief, a sense of mourning, regret? You didn’t like the way your stomach felt when you looked at him, so you stopped.
⸝⸝
Weeks went by, the bullying never stopped, why would it? You kept quiet, your gaze downcast as you moved through the hallways. It worked, because you rarely saw him anymore. You didn’t know if he was avoiding you or not, you didn’t care. It felt nice to not care. The only thing tugging away at you now… was the loneliness. It wasn’t like Yeonjun acted friendly with you, especially not during school hours, but he had made you feel less alone. In the most fucked up way possible, he was the only one you had ever had some kind of relationship with since your first day here. And a small part of you missed it.
But even the loneliness would one day stop.
You blink up as a plate is placed opposite yours in the crowded cafeteria. Confused, your eyes darted between the boy before of you and the plenty of empty tables. He doesn’t seem to care as he slides down on the chair in front of yours. “You’re the junior girl who takes classes with the seniors right?” He asks as he tilts his head to the side, studying you with wide and curious eyes. — Still wary of the intentions behind his move to sit with you, you slowly nod, “I am.”
He smiles, it was perhaps one of the first genuine smiles you had received since you started here. Shuffling a bit closer, he offers his hand for you to shake, which you hesitantly do. “I’m Hueningkai, but you can just call me Kai.” He says as you let go of his hand once more. — “I’m a junior too, but I’m stuck with everyone else our age”, he explains with a coy smile.
You nod, taking a small sip of your water. His eyes shift to the book placed next to your tray. “Lord Of The Rings?” He asks and you hum as you turn it around for him to see. “I love those books!” He exclaims as he brings it to his face, studying the back intently. “I’m re-reading them..” You quietly mumble as your gaze flickers between him and the glass in your hand. Kai sets the book down as he turns to you, “you mean you’ve read all this more than once? Sick!”
That was how you met Kai. You don’t know why he approached you, you didn’t care to ask. All you knew was that you had finally found a friend. And though the two of you still took separate classes, you always stayed behind to study together, ate lunch just the two of you, and walked each other to class. It felt nice to have someone to talk to, even though you didn’t tell him about you and Yeonjun, he still listened to you as you explained all of the bullying.
You were amongst the last to return to class after lunch one lousy Tuesday. Kai and you had spent the entire break discussing quantum physics, and you had only realized the time once you went to search something up on your phone, making you rush to class. Not thinking much of the rare occurrence, you make your way over to your desk by the very back of the room, only freezing when one of your classmates addresses you.
“What’s got you coming in so late, nerd?” He sneers as he leans back in his chair to see you better. With the intention of not replying, you take your seat as you begin rummaging through your stuffed bag. But when another girl butts in, you feel yourself go stiff. “Don’t you know?” She drawls, easily garnering the first guy’s attention as well as everyone around her. Even the Choi’s seemed to be listening as Beomgyu put down his phone. You held your breath, anticipating the worst yet it somehow ended up being so far from anything you could’ve ever imagined.
“Nerd’s got a boyfriend.” She exclaims, watching triumphantly as everyone began whispering amongst each other, hushed murmurs carrying around the room. You felt your face burn as you glanced toward Yeonjun’s table. — He was still scrolling absentmindedly on his phone, but the way his jaw clenched, accompanied with the small frown of his brows, made your stomach sink just slightly.
“That’s such bullshit!” Mimi exclaims as she throws you a harsh glare. But the girl who’d announced the news merely shakes her head. “I’ve seen them myself!” She retorts as she folds her arms across her chest. “That junior boy, y’know the blonde one.” — “I’ve seen them too!” Someone else chirps in and the girl is quick to nod.
“They always eat lunch together too”, the girl turns to you with a wide smirk, “isn’t that right nerd?” — Your fingers curled around the pencil in your hand, gripping it with such force that it might break. You don’t look at her, gaze dropping to your table as you merely shook your head, earning a scoff from the girl as she turned back to the rest of the class.
“Shit, are you serious?” Beomgyu wonders as he leans forward in his chair. But before the girl has a chance to reply, Yeonjun cuts her off. “Don’t be stupid”, he mutters as he pulls Beomgyu back by the collar of his shirt. — “What the fuck man, it’s just a question”, he whines as he rubs his now sore neck. Yeonjun huffs as his gaze remains glued to his phone screen, “of course she isn’t serious. Stop believing her bullshit.”
Beomgyu falls silent at his words and so does everyone else. The next few minutes are awkward as everyone scrambles to occupy themselves with whatever they could find, desperately wishing for your professor to walk through the doors.
⸝⸝
The sound of the old library doors being pushed open shifts your focus from the book in your lap as you glance up just in time to see Kai approaching your desk. He smiles, waving his hand enthusiastically and you find yourself reciprocating the small move. — “Sorry I’m late”, he apologizes as he takes the seat next to yours, pulling a few books from his bag. “It’s fine, really”, you assure him as you place your own book down.
It had become routine for the two of you to meet up and study together, well, you often just talked the hours away, but neither of you seemed to mind the lack of work getting done. “Which chapter are you on?” He wonders, and you slide the book over for the two of you to share, “fifteen.” He nods as he scoots closer, your shoulders practically touching as you take turns reading and scribbling down notes.
Usually you didn’t mind the close proximity, but when thinking back of what had transpired after lunch earlier that day, you felt different. Ever since your break up with Yeonjun, if break up was even what you could call it, you had little desire to enter into a new relationship. But the more you mulled over your classmate’s words, the more sense it all seemed to make. — Eating lunch together, walking each other to class, even now, you both sat so close that you could hear the pattern of his breathing.
Kai was cute. He was the type of cute that made you look back twice when you passed him on the street, the type of cute that made you want to revisit the small café because of the waiter that had served you, the type of cute that you wanted to bring home to your parents. — Not only was he cute, he was nice too, you felt happy, comforted, in his presence. Unlike Yeonjun, Kai only made you feel giddy inside as you longed to see him. He never made you second guess his intentions or yourself.
But there was still something missing, something that you couldn’t quite place. Something that Yeonjun had made you feel by just stepping into the same room as you. You hated yourself for comparing your new friend to someone like him, but it felt almost impossible not to. You didn’t care about Choi Yeonjun anymore, so why did he continue to haunt the subconscious parts of your mind?
As if on cue, Kai turns around in his seat, his nose almost grazing your own due to how close you sat. “Hey are you following along?” He wonders, seemingly concerned as a small frown tugs at his brows. Blinking, you shake your head, “sorry no..” — You swallow, willing yourself to be honest with him, you need to be.
“Can I…can I tell you something?” You hesitantly ask, gnawing on your bottom lip as you twirl your pencil anxiously between your fingers. He nods, a small smile painting his lips, “of course!” — Awkwardly clearing your throat, you think of a way to begin the whole thing. “W-Well basically…Everyone in my class they-”
Your words get stuck in your throat, not because you were afraid of uttering them, not because Kai made you in any way feel uneasy. But because the oak doors to the library opened once more, the sound almost deafening to your ears, eyes becoming glued to Yeonjun’s frame as he enters. It doesn’t take him long to spot you, his already spiteful expression seemingly worsening as his gaze locks with yours.
He grasps a book tightly in one hand, walking over to the front desk as he practically slams it on the table, making everyone inside the room jump as their heads turn in his direction. Yeonjun however, pays them little mind, his eyes never straying from yours as the old librarian goes to check out his book. — Even Kai’s attention had shifted toward your classmate, watching as Yeonjun leaned against the desk with a scowl on his face.
“Isn’t he in your class?” He wonders as the frown on his face deepens. You nod, “ignore him”, you mumble as you shift uncomfortably under his intense gaze. “But he’s looking at you..” Kai states and you shake your head again, “please let’s just ignore him.” — Finally, Kai tears his gaze from him as he gives you a small nod, “of course. So what’d you want to tell me?”
Oh right. “Well I… It’s a bit weird, promise you won’t be freaked out.” You begin as you bite your lip, feeling an evident blush rise on your cheeks. Kai nods as he takes your hand, the small action somehow making the whole thing even worse but you couldn’t find it in you to push him off. From the corner of your eye, you can make out Yeonjun’s figure as he watches the two of you, his mere presence made the hairs on the back of your neck stand.
“My classmates they…they sort of think we’re…well they think we’re dating..” You quietly mumble, the last part becoming nothing more but a faint whisper. You can easily read his surprise as Kai’s eyes widen, his gaze flitting down to his hand on top of yours as he swallows. “Oh.” Is all he says. — “I hope it doesn’t make things weird between us”, you quickly add, your voice near pleading as you search his gaze.
Biting the inside of his cheek, Kai slowly nods as he keeps his eyes on your hands. “No I suppose it doesn’t… I mean, it’s not like it’s true..” He says, offering you a small smile as his gaze returns to your face. You nod, “y-yeah, exactly..” — Daring to steal a glance in the direction of Yeonjun, you barely manage to catch his retreating figure as he exits the library, oak doors slamming shut behind him.
Kai follows your gaze, his hand on top of yours moving back to rest on his lap as his eyes flicker between the spot where Yeonjun just vanished and your almost longing expression. He sighs.
⸝⸝
It’s nearing 6pm when you finally part ways outside the library. And after waving Kai off, you turn to walk up the flight of stairs leading to your locker. The hallways are vacant, your low heel shoes clacking against its floors as you readjust your heavy bag on your shoulder. — Your footsteps come to an abrupt halt about halfway down the long corridor, your eyes spotting a tall figure, leaning against the red lockers by the end of the hall. You swallow, easily recognizing his lean frame. It’s too late to turn back, you know that he’s heard you already.
“Have you been waiting here all along?” You wonder, stopping a few paces from him, maintaining a good distance as you shift your weight over to one leg. Yeonjun’s head, previously leaning against the red steel behind him, lazily turns in your direction as he studies you with a tired expression. “No.” — You knew it was a lie.
“Then why are you here?” For once, it’s your gaze boring into his, and not the other way around. Yeonjun remains silent, his hands digging deep into the pockets of his pants, his eyes roaming your body just like they had so many times before. He doesn’t say anything. You wait for him to speak, you wait for two whole minutes. Nothing.
With a small huff, you give up as you approach your locker. Now only inches from him, you type your code in as the red door clicks open. Pulling your books from your bag, he watches you as you place them neatly inside the small space. You bite your tongue, refraining from saying the many things on your mind. It would only complicate the situation further. — It’s not until you close the locker again, turning around as you get ready to leave, that he finally breaks the silence.
“Is it true?”
You freeze, slowly turning back to face him with a small frown. Still leaning against the lockers, he tilts his head to the side, his expression holds no amusement, not even anger, just…emptiness. You had never seen him like that before. — “What?” The surprise is evident in your voice, and you watch as he pushes himself off the lockers, moving to face you completely. “You and him, is it true?” He repeats his question and your breath gets stuck in your throat at the mention of Kai.
You didn’t want him to become the next affection of Yeonjun’s harsh bullying. More than anything, you wanted to maintain the only friendship you had, you could not have your past mistakes getting in the way of it. — “Does it matter?” Your stance remains guarded as you fold your arms across your chest. He cocks an eyebrow in your direction, his lip twitching, “of course not.”
Confused, you frown, you had forgotten how near impossible he was to read. “Well then there you have your answer.” You firmly state. He shakes his head, and you could’ve sworn you caught the small grin on his face before it vanished again. “So then it is true..” — “Yes.” The small word of confirmation slips from your lips without you even realizing it. But it was too late to take it back now. Yeonjun frowns, he seems almost surprised at your immediate response.
“It’s true that we hang out everyday. It’s true that he makes me smile, and laugh. It’s true that he cares for me and I for him. All of it is true, is that what you wanted to hear?” You’re almost out of breath by the end of your small rant. — Yeonjun’s jaw clenches, hands curling into fists inside his pockets as he draws in a sharp breath through his nose.
“So does it really matter if it’s true or not when he treats me in a way that makes me feel loved and appreciated?” You’re unable to hinder yourself from letting out all the emotions that you had kept pent up during the past weeks. And by the end, your voice sounds as if it’s about to break at any moment. — But he doesn’t say anything. His expression remained as indifferent as possible, watching the way your chest heaved as you caught your breath again.
His silence felt heavier than a thousand words. Part of you wants to swallow your statement again, another part is relieved to finally have gotten it out. You quickly realized that you probably wouldn’t get another response from him, and thus you made your second move to leave. Except this time, he acts faster.
Fingers wrapping around your wrist, Yeonjun prevents you from taking another step away from him. His grip is tight, but not enough to hurt, you can feel the slight tremble to his hand and your gaze dart between his hold on you to his now determined expression.
“I could too.”
His voice is low, yet the sentence echoes off the empty hallway walls. Your heart thumps loudly in your chest, blood rushing beneath your skin as your wide eyes meet his. — “I could make you feel like that too.” His voice is clearer now, steadier, and he takes a step forward. You find yourself shaking your head, making him frown. “Why, don’t you believe me?”
The question made you scoff. “Of course I don’t.” You exclaim as you withdraw your arm from his grip, he lets you, briefly glancing down to his now empty hand before letting it fall to his side. “You’ve said it yourself. I’m nothing besides a quick fuck, right?” — He bites the inside of his cheek, your words undoubtedly true.
Maybe three weeks ago, his small statement would’ve been able to sway you, to make your heart beat a little faster. Now it only felt like he was rubbing salt onto your barely healed wounds. Just as you had gotten over him, just as you had finally made a real friend, he had to go and ruin it all again by saying exactly what you both dreaded and longed to hear from him. And you hated him for it. You hated Choi Yeonjun.
Tears stung in your eyes, threatening to spill down your cheeks. You couldn’t let him see you cry. — He grabs onto you a second time as you turn to leave, pulling you flush against his chest with such haste that you barely have time to register what’s happening before his lips are on yours. “Don’t go”, he breathes into your mouth, kissing you with such urgency that you thought he might just be on the verge of dying.
Your hands are on his chest within seconds as you pry him off. “Stop. Just stop.” Your pleading voice cuts like knives through the air and he pulls back with a stunned expression. Shaking your head, you tear yourself from him as you take a step back. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you. But it better stop.” He opens his mouth to say something but you beat him to it. “Don’t let me get my hopes up only to crush them again.”
Refusing to hear him out any longer, you quickly turn on your heel as you hurriedly walk down the hallway, leaving him behind as he runs a hand through his dark hair.
⸝⸝
The next day, Yeonjun doesn’t show up to school. You’re just as confused as everyone else, your eyes darting toward the door every other second, thinking that it might be him, but it never is. — “Is he sick?” Someone asks but Beomgyu only shakes his head, leaning back in his chair with a small huff, “beats me.” Ah, so he didn’t know either. Gnawing on your bottom lip, you’re suddenly filled with worry, was it because of what happened yesterday? Was he actually hurt by it? No, surely not, it was Choi Yeonjun after all.
It’s not until the doors bursts open once more, revealing a disheveled Mimi, that realization slowly starts to set in. Her usually put together face is in ruins as makeup has been smeared across her cheeks. Heads turn in her direction as one of her friends guides her over to her desk. — “What happened?” A guy asks only to be hushed by her friend, quietly mouthing out the words: “he broke up with her.”
Everyone seems to fall silent after that, allowing Mimi’s quiet sobs to fill the room as you wait for class to start. — He broke up with her… You blink, glancing down to the empty page in your notebook as you swallow. Did that also have anything to do with what happened yesterday? Once again you’re left feeling guilty, Yeonjun always seemed to make you feel that way.
When your professor finally arrives, the lecture moves slowly, agonizingly so. And for once, you didn’t find any joy in your studies. Sure it might also have something to do with the persistent feeling of being watched. — Turning your head ever so slightly to the right, you find Soobin’s eyes locked on your unnerved frame. Not even when he knows that you’ve caught him does he turn away.
He continues to watch you throughout the day. Wherever you went, he seemed to be there too. Eyes boring into you at all times, an indifferent expression on his face. He knew something, that much you were sure of.
⸝⸝
Finally, as your last lesson comes to an end, you manage to slip past Soobin’s prying gaze as you hurried down the stairs to meet Kai. The two of you had begun accompanying each other on the way home as you both took the bus from the same station. — You find him waiting by the entrance, a large smile plastered across his face and as soon as your eyes fell on him, all worries were washed away.
“How was class?” He asks as you walk down the courtyard. You shrug, swinging your bag in front of you cheerily, “nothing out of the ordinary.” — “No mean comments, no nothing?” He wonders and you bite the inside of your cheek, “no…actually not.” After the news of Mimi’s breakup, everyone had fallen into this sort of trance where no one seemed to want to bring attention to themselves. Thus you had been left alone all day, which felt both nice and incredibly weird.
Kai hums, the two of you were walking so close that your arms brushed together, but you didn’t mind. Once you reach the large gates leading out onto the streets however, you freeze. Stopping a pace in front of you, Kai turns to you with a small frown, “something wrong?” — You shake your head, “no…I just.. think I left a book behind, you go ahead.”
He opens his mouth, as if to object but you quickly interrupt him, “it’s fine! I wouldn’t want you to miss your bus”, you reassure him as you offer a small smile. “Then what about you?” He wonders but you just wave it off in a disregarding manner, “I’ll take the next one, don’t worry about me.” He doesn’t seem entirely convinced but the small hug you give him makes him nod. “Alright, text me when you get home”, he says and you quickly agree as you send him off.
You watch him disappear down the pavement with a small sigh. Not until he’s completely out of sight do you turn to cross the street. You walk with long and determined strides, not stopping until you reach the large tree by the sidewalk. — Yeonjun isn’t wearing his usual school uniform, instead he’s dressed in a dark pair of jeans, a black jacket wrapped around his torso to prevent the chilly December air from getting to him. He leans against the naked tree trunk, his gaze flickering from the concrete beneath him and over to you as you approach.
Feet planting in front of his, you cross your arms as you peer up at him with an expectant look on your face. He doesn’t say anything, tongue prodding against the inside of his cheek. Unable to bear the silence, you break it. “You didn’t come to school today.” You don’t know why you stated the obvious, perhaps you wanted him to explain himself, but he doesn’t, only nodding silently.
Frustrated, you run a hand through your hair. He wanted to talk to you, right? That’s why he was waiting across the street from your college, openly risking being spotted by your classmates. So why wasn’t he saying anything? — Huffing out a short breath, you part your lips to say something, but he’s quicker than you.
“I broke up with her”, he calmly states. His posture remains relaxed as he speaks but his eyes search yours with something akin to desperation. — “I know.” You mumble, biting the inside of your lip before continuing, “she was crying all day, did you know that?” He scoffs, “so?” His nonchalant approach made you frown, “so? Don’t you care?” Your question is met by the mere shake of his head as he shrugs, “no, do you?”
“I do.”
He hadn’t expected your answer, you could tell by the way his face dropped, if only for a moment. “Why? It’s not exactly like she’s a good person.” He jeers, shoving his hands deeper into the denim pockets of his jeans. “And you are?” Even though your voice remains steady, there’s a linger of hurt between your quiet words. — He goes silent in front of you as his gaze flits between yours and the entrance behind him.
“Why are you even here, Yeonjun?” Your tone is near accusing and he looks almost guilty as his attention shifts back to you. He swallows, rubbing a hand along his neck, as if stalling for time. You bite your tongue, waiting patiently for him to speak. — “Why do you like him?”, he finally asks. It hardly took a genius to guess who he was referring to.
You sigh, observing the way the naked branches of the tree moved against the mild breeze. “I told you, didn’t I?” You drawl, readjusting the bag swung over your shoulder. The corner of his mouth twitches as Yeonjun shakes his head, “that’s not what I wanted to hear.” — “And you think you’re in a position to make demands like that?” You snort, watching as he pushes himself off the tree before taking a step in your direction.
Leaning back to glance up at him, you try your best to hold your ground as he tilts his head to the side, cocking a questioning eyebrow at you. “Then tell me what I need to do.” — Your mouth falls open as you gawk at him, what was he implying? Taking a step back only ends up with him taking yet another forward, his hands coming up from his pockets to rest on your shoulders.
“Tell me how to be like him.”
Slowly you realize just what he was asking of you. Immediately shaking your head, you take yet another step back. “It doesn’t work like that.” You quietly murmur, averting your gaze to avoid looking him in the eyes. He frowns, a confused frown, “sure it does”, he says, sounding almost hopeful as he grips your shoulders tighter. “Just tell me what I need to do and I’ll do it.”
Did he honestly think that everything could be undone just like that? The pain, the tears, the bullying, that he could take it all back just because he wanted to? Just because he had a change of heart? The thought was almost as ridiculous as his proposal. — This was Choi Yeonjun, he wasn’t about to change his ways just because of you, you should know that. Whatever this was, this moment of confusion, it wouldn’t last, and you had to pull out before you got hurt, again.
“I don’t know what you want from me…” You bite back the harsh insults waiting on your tongue, shaking your head once more. “I don’t know what it is, and I don’t care. Please just stop confusing me”, you almost beg as you try to pry his hands off of you. — Yeonjun looks perplexed as he lets you push him off. “Confusing you? I don’t–”
“Do you think I’m stupid?” You retort, your voice growing in intensity as you failed to hold back the anger and resentment you held for him. “I let you screw me over, I let you use me, humiliate me, I put up with all of it, because…” You exhale, taking a step forward as you point an accusing finger to his chest. “Because at one point I thought that I liked you, but I don’t. I know exactly what you are and I know that you won’t change.”
He frowns, his fingers wrapping around your wrist on his chest. “You don’t know the first thing about m-” — “I do.” You cut him off, aware of the way his jaw clenches as his grip on your wrist tightens. “I know that you cheat, you lie, you use people as you please, and worst of all, you don’t even feel guilty about it.”
You tear yourself from his grasp, stumbling backward as you cradle your sore wrist. “I know far from everything about you”, you state, watching him bite the inside of his cheek as he fights off the remark he so desperately wished to fire. — “But I know that I hate you. And that’s enough reason for me to stay as far away from you as possible.”
“So please, leave me the fuck alone.”
As soon as you turn around to dart down the street, the tears spill from your eyes as you sob into your open palm. More than anything, you regret ever becoming infatuated with him.
⸝⸝
Yeonjun didn’t come to school the following day either, nor the day after that. People stopped asking about him, only becoming disregarded by both Beomgyu and Soobin as the two kept to themselves. Yet the taller’s persistent stares remained as Soobin watched your every move, like a hawk stalking its prey. Even now, as you sat by your usual table, listening to Kai as he rambled on about a random topic, did you feel his gaze on you.
“D-Did you hear me?”
Kai’s hesitant voice snaps you from your trance as your eyes shift to his fidgety frame. Nervously twisting the hem of his uniform, he gives you a sheepish smile. You blink, “I…s–sorry what did you say?” You wonder, feeling a bit embarrassed by your lack of engagement as he spoke. But Kai only shakes his head, the tips of his ears turning pink as he clears his throat. “I was wondering if… if you would maybe want to study this weekend a-at my place?”
You could tell that it had taken almost all his courage to ask the simple question. But somehow you find yourself comparing it to how easy such demands had fallen from Yeonjun’s lips as he shamelessly took whatever he wanted. Internally you curse yourself for letting your mind so comfortably shift to the subject of Yeonjun when you had tried so hard to forget about him.
“Sure I would love to!” You smile, heart swelling at the endearing sight before you as Kai’s face practically explodes in an ocean of red. “R-Really?” He asks and you nod, “of course!” — You’re about to ask him what time would be suitable when suddenly a large shadow is casted over your table. Squinting up your eyes lock with none other than Choi Soobin as he peers down at you with a vacant expression.
“I need to talk to you.” He states in a monotone voice, jutting his chin toward the large entryway of the cafeteria. Your gaze flits between him and Kai as your friend shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “O-Okay”, you quietly mumble, giving Kai an apologetic look as you get up to trail after Soobin’s tall frame.
He walks fast, and you almost have to jog in order to keep up. Pushing past the crowded hallways, Soobin doesn’t seem to mind the multiple glances shot his way. The two of you walk for a good five minutes without stopping, and just as you’re about to ask where you’re going, he comes to an abrupt halt, making you almost facepalm against his back.
With the light kick of his foot, the door to a vacant classroom swings open and he steps inside, seemingly waiting for you to do the same. — Once the door is shut behind you, he turns to lean against the wall, folding his arms across his chest. Nervously, you tug at the collar of your blazer as you glance around the dark room.
You don’t think you had been alone with Soobin, ever. Nor did you think that you had ever heard him utter more than two words out loud. And he had never directed a single one to you. So to say that your current situation was surprising, would be a grave understatement. — You think a whole minute must have passed when he finally speaks. But the words coming out of his mouth made you wish for everything to be silent again.
“What’s your deal with Yeonjun?”
His voice is low, barely above a murmur, and deep too. Not at all like his snarky friends whose laughs would echo off the hallways. You swallow, hard, the sound is audible in the otherwise quiet room. Unlike Beomgyu, Soobin never once picked on you, nor did he join in when the others were laughing, at best or worst, he would give a small grin. — If it were Beomgyu you would at least expect him to be mad in a situation like this, but Soobin remains eerily calm as he watches you from a distance, just like he had these past three days.
“I don’t think that’s any of your business”, you stand your ground, despite the fact that it felt as if the floor was literally shaking beneath you. He chuckles, it’s breathy, almost inaudible. “You don’t need to act so prideful, he’s told me everything about you.” — It feels as if all air has been knocked out of your lungs. So he did know something.
“Everything?” You exhale, your breath near trembling. He gives a curt nod, “everything, except for why he isn’t here today”, he mutters, seemingly displeased with the fact. — A small frown etches its way to your face, lips parting in confusion. “I know you’ve got something to do with it.” He states, tilting his head back as he gazes up toward the ceiling. “But he won’t tell me what.”
Biting the inside of your cheek, you glance down to the floor, the uneven wood planks suddenly seeming very intriguing. “I couldn’t possibly know why he–” — “Don’t bullshit me.” He snaps, his eyes flickering back to you within milliseconds. Your breath gets caught in your throat as you flinch, taking a small step back before your thighs hit the table behind you. Soobin ignores your skittish reactions as he continues. “I don’t know what he’s getting at, going for someone like you.” He says it with such distaste that it makes your skin crawl.
Before you know it, he takes a step forward, then another one, and another one, until he’s got you caged against the desk. He doesn't say anything, one of his hands reaching into his pocket as he rummages through it. Pulling up a folded piece of paper, he shoves it into your open palm. “He asked me to give you this.” — He brushes his hand against his jeans as he takes a step back.
“Fix whatever you caused.” Is all he says before turning on his heel to leave again. Upon yanking the door open, he’s met with Kai’s alarmed frame as he jumps to the side. Sparing him a mere side glance, Soobin shoves past him as he takes off down the hallway. — You shove the small paper in the pocket of your blazer as you walk over to your friend with a sheepish smile. “Hey how long have you been standing-”
“You and Yeonjun?” He asks, almost baffled as he eyes you, full of distrust. The smile immediately vanishes from your face and your throat suddenly goes dry. “W-What?” You ask, still not registering his question fully, hoping that maybe you had heard him wrong. Kai shakes his head, his jaw momentarily clenching. “Just how much exactly did you hear?” You quietly whisper.
He gives you a small shrug, “enough.” — He sighs, looking almost defeated as he runs a hand through his blond hair. “I thought you…I mean the two of you, I never thought…” Frowning, he gives up with a small huff and you bite your lip, reaching out a hesitant hand to place on his shoulder, but he only jerks away from your touch.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” He sounds hurt, you can tell he is. The guilt was slowly seeping back into your veins, Yeonjun always made you feel guilty, but this time…this time it was your own doing. “I’m sorry.” The apology is genuine, you hope he can tell. Because you really are sorry, sorry for not being honest with your only friend.
Kai looks at you, his eyes hold so much pain that you wondered just how deep your lie had stung. “Do you like him?” He asks, his voice sounds strained, as if he was holding back tears. The question catches you off guard and you blink. Did you like him? No, of course not. You hated him. You hated Choi Yeonjun.
“No, nevermind, don’t answer.” He shakes his head, “I don’t care.” — You fumble for words, wanting to say anything that would comfort him. It felt almost impossible. “I- I’m sorry I should’ve told you I–” — “Yeah you should’ve.” He bites back, his unusually harsh tone making you wince. “You should’ve told me a long time ago. Before I..” He cuts himself off, biting his cheek as his gaze drops to the floor.
“Before what?” You quietly wonder, noting the way his shoulders slumped as he exhaled a shaky breath. “Before I liked you.” His voice is merely above a whisper, his attention strained to the floor as he refused to look you in the eyes. Your mouth falls open, it wasn’t like you were completely unaware. Kai’s lingering touches and stares didn’t go unnoticed but you had never imagined that his feelings ran this deep.
“You like me?”
He scoffs, dragging his feet leisurely in front of him. “I thought that was obvious.” He pauses, his gaze briefly meeting yours before fleeting down again, but it was just enough for you to catch the shiny layer of tears coating his lashes. You swallow, it felt almost as if you were about to throw up, the guilt slowly eating away at you.
All you could do was stare at him with a stunned expression, not knowing what you could possibly say to mend the situation. Kai draws in a sharp breath before he wipes his face with the back of his hand. “It’s alright”, he mumbles, “it’s not your fault.” — Your heart might as well just have been ripped out and stepped on at this point. Why was he being so kind to you, when you so obviously didn’t deserve it.
“We’re friends still…aren’t we?” He wonders, looking up from the floor with bloodshot eyes. “T-This doesn’t change anything, right?” — You wanted to tell him that this changed everything, that things might never be the same again. But you couldn’t, you couldn’t hurt him like that. So you shake your head, wrapping your arms around him as you hug him tight. “Of course not, Kai.”
You wondered if things had turned out differently between the two of you, had you never gotten involved with Yeonjun.
⸝⸝
It’s early, earlier than you’d like to admit as you leave your apartment that Sunday morning. The sun has yet to rise and the city is still asleep, but you haven't been able to shut your eyes and relax for the past three days. No, you had waited, dreaded, for this day to come. — The bus is almost empty, save for another young woman, but she looks far more comfortable than you as she rests her head against the window.
The air is cold as you step off, and you hug your coat tighter around your body. You walk for about ten minutes before a large building comes into view. Pulling the small note from your pocket, you glance between the address scribbled down and the number on the building in front of you, they perfectly align. — The note, the one Soobin had so hastily shoved in your hand three days ago, the note you had reread at least a hundred times throughout the weekend. An address, a day, but not a time. — Perhaps you were a bit early, but as you trudged up the stairs, you no longer cared. You had waited for three whole days, you’d had enough.
You take the stairs instead of the elevator. To get some exercise in, you tell yourself. But there was no mistaking the fact that you wanted to prolong the moment for as long as possible, despite your urgency to get here. — Finally, you reach the fifth floor, out of breath, you lean against the wall as you take a moment to gather yourself.
The first time you read the note you had considered not showing up at all. It was a cowardly move to send his friend in his place. But at the same time, your mind longed for answers, answers that you would hopefully get today. — You bring the paper to your face, rereading it one final time. The address, the day, and the small sentence, at the very bottom.
“Let’s talk, please.”
Fine, if he wanted to talk, then you would talk. Your fingers curl into a fist, lightly tapping the dark wood. Had it been anyone else, you would’ve been mindful of the still early hour. But right now your mind was set on one thing alone. — Your heart beats obnoxiously loud in your chest, the wait seemingly eternal.
Then the door creaks open. And as soon as your eyes fall on him, you can tell that he’s had trouble sleeping too. The bags under his eyes were a most unusual look, his hair too, laid messily sprawled on top of his head. He’s still dressed, almost as if he hadn’t gone to bed at all. — “Hi”, his voice is low, raspy, like he hadn’t spoken in days. You give him a small nod of acknowledgement and he steps aside as he lets you in.
Yeonjun’s apartment is clean, minimalistically furnished. It wasn’t like you had ever tried to imagine what his home would look like, but this somehow felt just like him. Your gaze trails across the few paintings on the walls, you can tell that he hadn’t picked them himself, most likely they came with the flat. The white couch, situated by the large windows, catches your eye.
Upon walking over and taking a seat, you find that Yeonjun does the same, maintaining a respectable distance as he glances down towards his hands. For a moment, everything is quiet. Part of you wished to stay like this forever. But that was of course impossible. — He clears his throat, shifting awkwardly on the sofa. “Do you want something to drink?” You bite your lip before nodding, “water’s fine.”
He gets up, walking over to the joint kitchen as he turns on the faucet. You can hear him grabbing glasses, filling them to the brim before returning to place one in front of you on the marbled coffee table. Quietly thanking him, you take the glass, bringing it to your lips as you take a sip. You wait for him to speak first, he was after all, the one who had reached out.
Yeonjun looked very different like this. In the comforts of his own home he resembled little of the person you had grown accustomed to in school. You wondered if he often brought people over, judging by how awkward he was acting, you supposed not. — He draws in a sharp breath, his gaze remaining downcast as he speaks.
“You got my note..” He mumbles as you set your glass down. “I did”, you state, leaning back against the soft cushion as you turn your head in his direction. “Why didn’t you give it to me yourself?” You frown, feeling rather hurt by his choice of using his friend, his friend who definitely didn’t seem to like you. Yeonjun is silent, he’s silent for a good while, fingers intertwined with one another as he bites the inside of his cheek.
“I was scared.” He quietly admits and your eyes widen at the confession. “Y-You were?” You can’t shield the surprise in your voice, Choi Yeonjun, scared? He scoffs, and for a moment, his usual self emerges as his face turns into a small scowl, but the way his eyes flicker as he speaks gives him away. “Of course I fucking was, I still am.”
“Why?”
He doesn’t answer straight away, as if considering his next words with great care. Running a hand through his disheveled hair, he lets out a small almost inaudible exhale. “Because I’m scared that I’ve fucked things up so bad this time… That there’s no going back.” — You uncomfortably shift on the couch as you distract yourself by taking another sip of your water. Yeonjun’s body is taut as his jaw clenches, refusing to even glance in your direction he keeps his gaze steadily fixed on the window in front of him as the darkness outside slowly shifts into a deep blue.
“I want…” He slowly begins, his sentence falling short as he takes another couple of breaths. “I want to apologize.” You blink, your eyes shifting from the water in your glass and over to him, you don’t think you had ever heard him speak with such sincerity. — And for the first time since your arrival, he looks at you. He swallows, adam's apple bobbing as he does.
“I’m sorry.”
When you don’t say anything he hastily continues. “I know that it doesn’t fix shit, but I…I still need to say it. And if I could I would go back and undo all the pain I caused you, I really would. I don’t expect you to forgive me, quite frankly I don’t even expect you to ever talk to me again, I suppose that’s fair. But if I don’t tell you how sorry I am now, I’m afraid that I never will.” He takes a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before letting it go again, his shoulders slumping, almost like a deflating balloon.
“So, I’m sorry…for everything.”
He holds his tongue after that, gaze dropping down to his fingers once more. You don’t know how to feel, much less what to say. It was all so surreal. Hearing those words come out of his mouth felt almost like a fever dream and you wondered if you had perhaps managed to fall asleep after all and that this was just a fragment of your imagination, the universe pulling a sick prank on you.
But then you turn to look at him. He’s nothing like the Yeonjun who had hurt you for so many weeks. Right now he looks small as he sits on the couch, biting the inside of his lip as he nervously rolls his thumbs together. In the end you realize that no matter how you feel, there’s only one thing you can say to him.
“I forgive you.”
He freezes, teeth letting go of his lip as he slowly lifts his head to peer over at you. An almost puzzled look paints his otherwise tired face, “you do?” He sounds almost disbelieving as he studies you with a wary expression. — You slowly nod, watching as his eyes widen with recognition, he swallows. Then everything becomes silent once more. This time it’s a different kind of silence, it’s not comfortable but the air somehow feels lighter, if only a little.
You find yourself staring out the large windows. The sky had turned a deep orange now, shades of pink seeping through the cracks formed by the clouds. The darkness slowly makes way for the light as a new day rises before you. — You want to say something, now feels like a good moment to get things off your chest. But you can’t seem to find the words, your throat feels thick and it becomes hard to swallow.
“Please like me instead.”
At first you thought that you had imagined it. The faint whisper of his lips. But when he shuffles next to you on the couch, turning to face you fully, there’s no doubt about it. You tear your gaze from the warm sky as you glance over at him. In the morning light, Yeonjun looked like he was glowing. Despite the dark circles under his eyes, his dry lips, or even his unkempt hair; he looked truly beautiful.
“What?”
Your voice is soft, a low murmur, unsure and hesitant. He scoots closer, your knees touching as he places his hands on the cushion either side of him. “Like me instead. Instead of him.” Instead of Kai. He searches your gaze desperately as he bites his lip, leaning closer. — You don’t say anything, if you do, his statement would become real. You’re scared, you think.
But he doesn’t give up. “I know that you hate me, but please, I can’t stand it when-”
“I don’t hate you, Yeonjun.”
His mouth shuts, and he blinks at you, confused, brows knitting together. “What?” — “But you said..” You shake your head, turning away as you feel tears prick in the corner of your eyes. You hated how easily he made you cry, even when he didn’t intend to. “I lied.” You confess, shame and guilt overflowing your senses. “Why?”
“Because I was scared.”
As the words left your lips, you think that the two of you might not be so different after all. Maybe, just maybe. — Yeonjun doesn’t say anything, his attention dropping to your knees, barely grazing one another. His hand on the sofa twitches, as if he held himself back from reaching out, from touching you.
“I was scared of liking you.” Your quiet whisper felt like a weight being lifted off your shoulders. A small murmur was all it had taken, so why had it seemed so hard? — His gaze shifts back to your face, his eyes wide as his lips part in surprise. “You were right all along”, you give him a half hearted smile, watching as his frown deepened. “I’ve always liked you”, you swallow, “even when I didn't want to.”
A pang of guilt takes over his expression for a moment as he internally cringes at your words, more so his own actions. “I thought it would go away if I told myself that I hated you.” You shake your head, glossy eyes dropping to your hands, the first tears threatening to escape at any moment. “It never did.” Your vision slowly becomes blurred as you blink away the salty droplets that fell down your cheeks.
You can barely see it, but you can feel it, the warm caress of his hand on your cheek. It feels nice, comforting, you don’t push him off, you don’t want to. He wipes your tears, the very same that he had caused. The faint whisper of yet another apology lingering on his lips. — Then he hesitates, you never saw Yeonjun hesitating, he always took what he wanted, did as he pleased. But you can tell that he’s uncertain of his next move. His eyes flickering between your teary eyes and parted lips.
In the end he decides to be brave. Slowly initiating what had been on both of your minds for weeks now. But when his lips meet yours, it feels different, this kiss is nothing like your previous ones. It holds no guilt, no shame, no secrets, it doesn’t feel forced nor desperate. It feels like an apology, remorseful of the past, and like a promise, a vow to the future. You can tell that he expects you to pull back, to tell him off, just like you had days prior.
Instead you cling to him, part of you thinks that this might be just what you need, another part says it’s stupid and reckless. But in the end, you want to be brave too. Even if that meant being stupid and reckless. — The stupid and reckless part of you lets him push you back against the soft cushion, lets him kiss you deeper, lets his hands trail across your body.
“I’m sorry.” He chants it like a prayer, littering your body in the light caress of his lips. You know he means it, every kiss, every touch, every apology. — His hair feels soft between your fingers, you twist the strands lightly, feeling him sigh against your skin. Yeonjun was usually one to talk in moments like these, but today there are no sarcastic remarks on his tongue. He’s quiet, attentively listening to the hitch of your breath, the small moan passing your lips, he doesn’t want to miss a single thing.
He tugs your tights off, his hands immediately soothing the goosebumps erupting on your naked skin. You think he looks pretty like this, basked in the first rays of sunshine, half lidded eyes rapidly moving as he trails them across every inch of your body. — His lips return to yours, fingers sliding between your legs just like they had so many times before, but this time it’s different, everything is.
He touches you slowly, he pays attention, he wants to know exactly how he makes you feel. Treating you as if you were made out of glass, worshiping you as if you were made out of gold. You become hyper aware of the way his body moves against yours, the soft pattern of his fingers sending sparks through your stomach.
You had been intimate with Yeonjun more times than you could remember. Yet as he lines himself up alongside you, it suddenly feels like the first. It feels new, nervous, perhaps even a little scary. But that was okay, you knew that he was scared too. — He goes slow, savoring the moment as his face rests in the crook of your neck. “I’m sorry.” He can’t stop saying it, it’s never enough, it never makes up for the damage he’s created, he knows it. But you forgive him, you would continue to forgive him for eternity if he apologized for as long.
He groans against you, his voice is near trembling. Your hands are on his back, feeling the smooth surface of his skin, then they’re tangled in his hair, pulling him to look at you. For the first time it feels as if you’re seeing him clearly. Behind the lying, the cheating, the bullying, it was just him. Just Yeonjun.
As soon as the first tear rolls down his cheek, you kiss him. Tasting the saltiness on your lips, he sobs into your mouth. His chest heaves against yours, his once slow and deliberate thrusts becoming jagged and uneven as he fights to stay composed. You want to say something, but you don’t know what. Instead you pull him closer, so close that you can’t feel anything but his body against yours.
You stay like that, melted against one another. Hours pass, neither of you seem to mind. His breath is warm against your chest, your fingers are soft in his hair. The silence is light, comforting, reassuring. Your mind is filled with him, he’s all you can think about, all you want to think about. You know he feels the same, it’s comforting to know. It’s also scary, you’re not sure if you’re ready. But even then, you’ll at least be scared together, just the two of you.
It’s nice to not be alone.
⸝⸝
Monday morning also feels different. Maybe because you’re walking down the hallway side by side, you and Yeonjun. People stare, he tells you to ignore them, you try, and it works. You glance over at him, he looks happy, his step is light, his arm securely wrapped around your waist. You find yourself smiling, biting the inside of your cheek as you gaze ahead.
It’s not until you reach the all too familiar door, leading into your classroom, that you halt. Confused, Yeonjun stops a pace in front of you. “Is something wrong?” He asks as he studies your nervous posture, your eyes flickering between the now almost empty hallway and the door in front of you. The corridors were one thing, but the classroom held so many memories. Memories that wouldn’t just vanish over a day.
He notices your hesitation, a small smile tugging at his lips as he shakes his head. He reaches out, his warm hand enveloping yours as he grips it firmly. You glance between your interlocked fingers, and the small grin splayed across his face. — “I’ve got you, nerd.”
The small reassurance makes you smile, and you nod, letting him tug you closer as Yeonjun pushes the classroom door open.
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'just need t'feel you around me'
part two of 'are you still awake?', Chris cant keep his hands off y/n once they make amends after an argument.
vibe check: pure SMUT, needy!chris, bigdick!chris, spooning position, sleepy!reader, needy!reader, 'skip the foreplay' type sex, all that good shit you get the vibes, falling asleep with it inside after sex (I wont tell you to wrap it but i will tell you to GO FOR A PISS AFTER YOU FUCK YOU DON'T WANT A UTI)
1.1k words
A/N: thankyou for all the love on part one hehe. soft and needy chris makes my toes curl like i'm biting the pillow as we speak. also you just know that chris is chatty as fuck during sex, kid loves the stimulation that comes with dirty talk so this is very verbal lol i hope you guys don't mind
love and cigs, merc
...."I jus' need t'feel you around me" Chris whispered, pulling his stiff length from his black boxers and pumping himself slightly into the curve of your ass.
You whined tiredly, the soft pressure of his leaking tip against your fleshy skin making you somewhat desperate, despite how adamant you were on Chris 'doing all the work'
Chris chuckled at your needy whines, "you still tired, ma?", he said, as he stroked his cock along your wet and puffy folds, collecting all your juices on his tip.
"mhm" you whimpered, stretching slightly and arching your back into him, the tip of his cock pressing into your hole ever so slightly with your movement.
Chris sucked the air around him in through his teeth, the very brief sensation of your sopping hole around him making him feel a little lightheaded. He pushed his cock between your folds, letting it push through them and into the soft skin of your thighs as they pressed together, palming the flesh of your ass with bruising pressure as he pulled your cheeks apart, edging his thumb painfully close to your core.
"so wet f'me and I ain't even touched you" He said in a low hum, a cheesy smirk forming on his face as he dipped his thumb into your pussy.
Your whole body shifted at the sensation, arching back into him even more as he ducked an arm in between you and the bed, wrapping it up and round you, taking a handful of your tit in his hand.
"mphm, Chris" you whined softly into the plush white pillow.
"hmm, I love it when you're all sleepy like this, baby, s'soft n' sexy" He said, peppering wet kisses along the curve of your shoulder and up to bite softly at your earlobe as he continued to tease your hole with slow thrusts between your folds.
"need you, Chris" you said through a whimper.
"m'right here, ma, what d'you need from me, huh? tell me" He whispered in your ear, a cheshire cats smile spread across his face as he felt you begin to push back onto his hips, his cock growing painfully hard as it leaked pre-cum over the soft, fleshy skin of your thighs.
"need you t'stretch me out, Chris, please" you brought your arm round behind you and raked your fingers though his hair, tugging at the root slightly.
A low and gravelly moan left Chris' throat and, with your begging, he was a desperate mess. He pulled his hips back from your ass, lining himself up with your glistening hole, his hand still gripping your ass and the other rubbing and pinching at your hardened nipple. He pressed his throbbing tip inside of your gummy walls, the sensation of you immediately clenching around him causing him to instinctively buck into you, bottoming out instantly.
A pornographic whine left your throat as Chris' teeth clenched around your shoulder, the sting of his cock stretching you out coupled with the warm pressure of his tongue, soothing over the mark forming on your shoulder made your eyes roll to the back of your head.
Chris' pumped in and out of you at an agonising pace, pulling out almost completely only to be sucked back in by your clenching, sopping hole.
"christ, baby, y'so fuckin tight around me" He moaned, pulling at the flesh of your ass before slapping the skin lightly.
You tugged harder on his hair, and he pushed his hand up and over your hip, dipping his long fingers down to find your puffy clit as he kept his agonising pace, fucking into you desperately slow.
He rubbed slow circles over your clit, your head hanging back on its hinge into his warm chest, a soft moan leaving your open mouth.
"thats it, jus' feel it baby, you feel so fuckin' good, so fuckin' good" He whispered gentle praises into your ear as he fucked into you, the pressure of his fingers against your clit making your whole body tingle.
All you could do was moan in response, your vision going blurry as your high was fast approaching, a familiar knot forming in your stomach as you clenched harder around Chris' cock.
"I never wanna fight with you again, princess, love ya too much to ever make you wanna go to bed without me ever again" He pressed warm, open mouth kisses along the side and back of your neck.
"I love you too, Chris, s'much" you whimpered.
Chris near enough growled into your ear at the sound of you telling him you love him, as if he hadn't heard it a thousand times. He picked up his pace slightly, fucking into you harder as he rubbed steady circles around your clit.
"tell me again, baby, tell me you love me, please"
"I love you, Chris" you moaned out, his faster pace bringing out closer and closer to your release.
"mphm, keep saying it, I love it when you say it" he grunted into your skin, chasing his own high now.
"fuck, I love you" your thighs started to shake as your stomach tensed completely, the act of telling him you love him as he desperately fucks into you only serving to turn you on more.
"oh shit, y'gonna make me cum, cum with me please, ma, cum all over my dick" Chris' hips began to stutter against your ass.
As if it was a reflex, Chris telling you to cum did exactly that, and your whole body shook in his grip as you released sticky hot cum all over his length, the juices forming a white ring around his base. "I love you, I love you, I love you" you whimpered out, clenching around him like a vice as you came.
"I love you more, princess, I lov-" Chris' words were cut off by a guttural moan as he came inside of you, his long threads of white cum painting your insides.
He stuttered into you, using his cum as lube as he rode out his high, unable to pull himself from you, desperate for the warmth your wet pussy provided.
Soft moans filled his room as he came to a halt, resting his head down onto your shoulder as you caressed his tousled hair.
"might jus' stay like this for a little longer, don't think i've had enough a'you yet" Chris said, bringing his arm up and pulling you into him, locking around you as he nestled his hips into your ass.
You let out a tired chuckle, nodding and curling back into him. Chris' warm skin pressed against yours, coupled with his tight grip around you lulled you to sleep almost instantly, and Chris wasn't far behind. You fell asleep like that, wrapped up in each other with his dick still tucked snug between your walls.
Even though arguing with Chris was horrible, the make-up sex was always worth it.
taglist: @sturniozalt@mattslolita@shaquilles-0atmeal@blahbel668@sleepysturniolo@le4hsblog @sarosfilms @joemamaaa42069 @2muchofaslvt @seluky10
#©sturnsdarling#christopher sturniolo#chris sturniolo#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo imagine#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#sturniolo imagine
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European getaway || cs55
☆ summary: y/n goes on a vacation to spain and ends up meeting carlos sainz by chance. tho she has no idea her european fling is actually a very successful f1 driver
☆ pairing: carlos sainz x nonfamous!reader
☆ fc & warnings: none
☆ requested: yes! thank you sm for this wonderful request
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
ynuser has made a post 🔒
liked by yourbff, yoursibling, friend2, friend 3 and 101 others
ynuser: i could get used to this! me encanta espana
view all 8 comments
yourbff: petition for us to stay in spain forever
ynuser: time to find our spanish husbands so we never have to leave!
yoursibling: europe looks good on u
ynuser: thanks b 💅🏻
friend3: always serving fits girl
ynuser: half of my clothes are stolen from you
friend2: obsessed with you
ynuser: obsessed with you bb
ynuser has added to their story 🔒
[1. girls night out ahead. 2. guys i met a hot man at this club. 3. hehe he’s taking me home. we stayed out so late it’s almost light again]
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yourbff: we look cute
yourbff: wait he’s hotter than i originally thought hold up 🤤🤤
yourbff: did you even get his name???? how am i supposed to make sure ur safe if i don’t know his name
ynuser: dude he’s so hot it’s insane and his name is carlos
ynuser: i’m with him at his hotel rn and this man has to be loaded this is the nicest hotel i’ve ever stepped foot in.
yourbff: hot AND rich AND sweet AND a gentleman???????? what is in the water here in spain
ynuser: i just googled his watch that he’s wearing and it’s $300k
yourbff: ok tea……y/n/n i’m so serious you are living every girls dream rn including mine
ynuser: i think i love him
yourbff: ok , maybe it’s time for you to come back to the hotel and get some sleep
ynuser: ugh you’re so right.
ynuser: he called me a driver , i’ll be back soon
yourbff: PLEASE TELL ME TOU GOT HIS NUMBER
ynuser: more than that 🤭 him and his friend are going to take us out for dinner tomorrow and show us around town 😫😍🫶🏻
yourbff: OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG
yoursibling: girl you wildin and i love it. stay safe pls
ynuser: yes of course bb
friend3: why that man kinda look familiar
ynuser: if u figure it out lmk
ynuser has added to their story 🔒
[1. sightseeing courtesy of our new friend carlos. 3. looks like we found ourselves some dates 😉]
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friend2: y/n are you sharing churros con chocolate with a MAN
ynuser: YES
ynuser: i’ve been caught
friend2: you sneak.. i need every single detail
yourbff: i feel like we are in a movie for real
ynuser: i think we might be
yoursibling: how is it that you and y/bff/n always end up in these sorts of romance novel type situations
ynuser: it’s bc we are the it girls 💅🏻
carlossainz55 had added to his story
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user1: what are you doing in madrid carlos
user2: OMG WHO IS THAT IN THE SECOND SLIDE CARLOSSSSS
landonorris: and what do we have here 👀
carlossainz55: just some travels in spain!
landonorris: with a girl??
carlossainz55: good catch 😉
landonorris: DETAILS?!
carlossainz55: if you must know and you promise to keep it secret
landonorris: of course mate
carlossainz55: i met this gorgeous girl in a club in barcelona and we hit it off. she doesn’t know im a driver she just thinks im a guy on holiday and its been rather refreshing so now im showing her around spain
landonorris: i support you in this brother but you know you’re gonna have to explain the whole famous thing at some point
carlossainz55: i know i know
user3: just fell to my knees is this a soft launch
charlesleclerc: enjoying break i see 😏
carlossainz55: yes i am 😏
user4: everyone stay calm!!!! stay CALM
user5: so little info here how am i supposed to find this girl by her shoes 🫣
user6: can’t wait till f1gossip sees this
ynuser has added to their story 🔒
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yoursibling: hold up did HE COME WITJ YOU GUYS
ynuser: yes 🤭
ynuser: when i tell you i think i met the love of my life
yoursibling: ugh i’m so jealous but also so happy for you!! you deserve this
friend2: bruh he’s fine as heck what is going on here
ynuser: no i know
yourbff: wait send me the pic of carlos and teto carrying our luggage pls im begging
ynuser: done and done
friend3: y/n y/m/n y/l/n have you ever seen a formula 1 race before
ynuser: you mean like the race cars?
friend3: yes the race cars!!!! i’m 99.9% sure that man in your photos drives for the FERRARI F1 TEAM. THAT IS THE CARLOS SAINZ
ynuser: oh my god… you’re right …….. he’s a FAMOUS FERRARI DRIVER?!
ynuser: oh my god he has 10 million followers
friend3: how did you NOT know this!!!!!!!!
ynuser: idk!!! i don’t follow f1!!!
friend3: well now you legally have to
ynuser: clearly omg
friend3: YOURE THE GIRL IN HIS STORY OFNEKGN
ynuser: OMG I AM
f1gossip has made a post
liked by user1, user2, user3, user4, user5, user6, and 4,255 others
f1gossip: carlos sainz has been spotted getting cozy with a mystery girl in madrid! we think this has got to be the girl who was in the story carlos posted a few days ago. they’ve also been spotted out at dinner with another woman and who we believe to be teto!! no information on who they are just yet but seem by all accounts to not be anyone we know
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user1: when will it be my turn!!!!
user2: that should be me 😭😭😭 happy for her i guess 😭😭😫😫
user3: so he was soft launching someone
user4: happy for him ig
friend3: ynuser girl
ynuser: oh my god
friend2: girl oh my god
yourbff: omg stop ???? is this movie about us???
user6: do you all know something we don’t
user3: no bc your profile pics kinda be similar to the girl in the pics f1 gossip posted 👀
user6: carlos doesn’t follow them yet but maybe that’ll change
user3: WAIT IT SAYS HES FOLLOWING YNUSER NOW
user5: i am so envious
ynuser has added to their story 🔒
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friend3: ok so the fan girls have found us it seems
ynuser: they really have… i have 2,694 follower requests right now
yourbff: the f1gossip account is trying to contact me,, they’re literally in my dms rn…. you look hot tho 😘😍😫
ynuser: they’re also trying to message me too. never thought our trip to spain would end up like this (i’m not complaining this is just a little overwhelming)
yourbff: me neither but if it had to happen i’m glad you met carlos!! you two seem like genuinely really well matched. i know it’s only been like…. 3 weeks but im stanning and shipping y/ncarlos so hard
ynuser: 😮💨😭 y/ncarlos omg stop hahaha
ynuser: i’m planning to put him in my pocket and take him back to the states with us
carlossainz55: ay dios mío hermosa chica 😍😍
ynuser: 🤭 you’re making me blush
carlossainz55: good, it’s cute when you blush
ynuser: you really have 10 million followers and drive for the scuderia ferrari huh
carlossainz55: yes mi amor. im sorry for not telling you sooner… i just really was enjoying getting to know you as just carlos and not as the ferrari driver
ynuser: and that makes sense i just … this is all just a bit intimidating
carlossainz55: no reason to be intimidated, i’m still just carlos 🥺
ynuser: if you say so
carlossainz55: i do say so hermosa🤍
carlossainz55: now that the cat is out of the bag…. do you want to come watch me race?
ynuser: you want me to come to one of your races?
carlossainz55: only if you want to! no pressure at all tho y/n/n
ynuser: i’d love to 😫
carlossainz55: i was hoping you’d say that. i’ll make arrangements for you to come to monza 😉
ynuser: italy?! omg i’ve never been to italy!!!!
carlossainz55: never?! oh boy then i have quite the time planned for us
landonorris: i feel like an elite member of a very exclusive club for being able to follow
ynuser: you are!! only 231 other people have the privilege
friend2: please send lando norris my number i see he’s following you now
ynuser: HAHAHAAH i respect the hustle. i tell him about you when i meet him in person in 2 weeks
friend2: IN PWROSN Y/N WHAT
yoursibling: bestie why are race car fan accounts trying to contact me all the sudden
ynuser: so you know that man i’ve been seeing while in spain with y/bff/n? turns out he’s a very famous formula 1 driver
yoursibling: you’ve got to be kidding me
ynuser: i am being very for real
ynuser has made a post 🔒
liked by carlossainz55, yourbff, yoursibling, friend2, landonorris, friend3, and 102 others
ynuser: thank you to spain for literally changing my life
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friend2: omg that’s where my sunglasses went 🙄
ynuser: idk what you’re talking abt 🤭
yourbff: thanks for going on the trip of a lifetime with me y/n/n
ynuser: i love you bestie 🫶🏻
carlossainz55: and thank you to the universe for crossing our paths 🥹
ynuser: thank you universe, i am forever grateful 😫
landonorris: ok cool girl alert
ynuser: you know it
friend3: i’m not sure how to act normal in these comments y/n
ynuser: me neither
yoursibling: you’re never coming home after italy in a few weeks are you
ynuser: nope!
carlossainz55 has made a post
liked by user1, charlesleclerc, scuderiaferrari, ynuser, yourbff, landonorris, yoursibling, and 783,102 others
carlossainz55: happy for the team, charles and the tifosi. it’s a shame i missed the podium but at least i got to spend my birthday with my favorite girl. until next time monza!
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user2: ohhhhhh a hard launch
user3: i wish he got a podium in his last monza in a ferrari
charlesleclerc: ❤️ thank you chili
alexandrasaintmleux: cuties 🤍
user4: this hard launch is distracting me from the immense sadness, thanks carlos
user55: she’s living my dream your honor
ynuser: feliz cumpleaños mi amor
carlossainz55: gracias princessa
ynuser: gracias por una semana perfecta [thank you for a perfect week]
carlossainz55: de nada 🤍
user10: you did all you could carlos
scuderiaferrari: we are proud of you chili
user16: you and your big brain still did amazing
yourbff: you did great carlos!
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
a/n: likes and reblogs appreciated!! i quite liked this one and hope you did too
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction
© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform
#f1 fandom#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#cs55 smau#cs55 x y/n#cs55 fluff#cs55 imagine#cs55 x reader#cs55 x you#cs55 fic#carlos sainz imagine#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz x you#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz x female reader#carlos sainz smau#carlos sainz fic#carlos sainz fluff
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AfterCare With Them- The Love And DeepSpace Men
parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader
genre: overall fluff but contains nsfw and unprotected sex, MDNI
a/n: writing this only bc misty invasion is tomorrow and i cant wait dfkahdfkshfaskh did you guys noticed i changed the banners bc this one a diff genre hehe
any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!
⋆。‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧。⋆
Xavier:
He doesn't stop giving you kisses when he cums inside you and would help you though the overstimulation by holding you tight until the feeling stops. He would ask if you we're okay and would listen if anything we're wrong.
He would fall on top of you and you both would be recollecting your breaths. He would be hiding against your chest and place little kisses all over them as you'll gently play with his hair. Once he pulls himself away from you, he'll grab you a cup of water so you're refreshed.
He would carry you to the bathroom and takes a bath with you because you probably can't stand after your activities. He would sit behind you and wash you softly and slowly while peppering your back and neck with soft kisses.
He'll put you first and make sure you're one hundred percent satisfied and content. He'll help dry you off and carry you back to bed and would dry himself off after before joining you.
Once your back together in bed, he would fall asleep so quickly with you nestled in his arms. You would hear his breathing go soft and quiet and you would soon fall asleep peacefully after.
Zayne:
He would immediately clean you up if he didn't cum inside of you. He wouldn't even ask and would get a refreshing cold drink of water and will ask after if you would like anything else.
While you drink your water, he'll prepare a bath for you both with the perfect temperature. Towels and nearby hygiene products would already be set on the counter. He would come back and ask how you would feel and he would listen intently to everything you had to say. He would carry you to the bathroom and let you soak up first before changing the sheets quickly.
Once he joins you, he'll wash your body and scrub the roots of your hair. Sometimes he'll apologize about the marks left on your skin, worried they might've hurt you. Once you're ready to get out of the bath, he'll pick you up and dry you himself and wrap you in a towel
He'll carry you back to the now clean and comfy bed and makes sure you're comfortable. He'll help you dress you up with whatever clothes you want that are comfortable.
Once your dressed all comfy, the two of you settled into the soft sheets and within minutes, you were already asleep in his arms. He watches you drift off to sleep as he ran his fingers through your hair softly. The comforting pressure of your body would soon make him fall asleep.
Rafayel:
You both were sprawled across the bed, limbs crossing over each other. You both turned to look at each other, looking over to see his contagious smile and you would feel one spreading over your own lips. Your hands would find each other and you both would wrap into a more comfortable embrace as you both tried to regain your breaths.
He'll crack a joke while he cradles you into his arms about how YOU should be the one to clean HIM up because he's the one that did most of the work. Obviously reassures you that he's joking.
He'll praise you, worship your body, comforting your sore legs and any body parts that felt sore or aching. He'd take special care of you to let you know how much you mean to him and thankful that he finally has you again.
He'll grab you a cup of water before preparing a nice relaxing bath for you both. He'll carry you to the bath and gently put you in before joining you. He'll help you wash you and you both might play a little bit in the water, splashing each other or playing with the bubbles before you both get out of the tub. He'll help dry you off and carry you back to bed.
As you the two of you settle into bed, he would make sure his arms are wrapped around you before you drift off to sleep. Will admire you for a bit before his eyes shut close.
After bath time was over and he carries you to bed, you would have to prepare for a second round. Obviously he's not done with you. He wants to paint your face white after he finished painting your pussy white a couple minutes ago.
Sylus:
He would intertwine his fingers with your own and slowly guides you over his chest so you're resting on top of him. He'll clean you off with a washcloth if he didn't already lick you clean and after he's done he'll grab you a cup of cold water.
If there were times where he was rough with you, he'll gently apply some oil and cooling gel onto any marks or any parts of your body that ached.
Draws you a bath with nice smelling soap or whatever you prefer. If you wanted some bubbles added to the bath, he'll add some even if he thought it was silly. He'll carry you to the bathroom and he'll sit behind you and hold you close to his chest. He'll rub the outside of your thigh because he knows they're most likely sore.
After you finish bathing, he'll help you get out of the tub and dry you off himself before he dries himself off. Would help brush your hair and give you of his shirts that are way too oversized on you before carrying you back to bed.
Would ask if you would like anything and if you did, he'll let you rest on the bed while he gets anything you need or wanted. And when you're falling asleep, you'll rest on his chest while he hums so softly.
#xavier x reader#xavier x you#xavier x y/n#zayne x reader#zayne x you#zayne x y/n#rafayel x reader#rafayel x you#rafayel x y/n#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus x y/n#xavier lads#zayne lads#rafayel lads#sylus lads#xavier love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#love and deepspace#love and deepspace fic#love and deepspace x reader#lads x reader#lads x you#lads smut#love and deepspace x you#love and deepspace scenarios
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THE THINGS HE TAKES FOR GRANTED
in which he takes a moment to justify himself after never noticing your little crush for him
starring. msby!miya atsumu x fem!reader
genre(s): angst to fluff, long scenario sets in post-timeskip!
warning(s): reader is nice and overworks herself. not proofhead i apologize
author’s note: It's kind of not what i had imagined but hope you enjoy it.
choose your character: m. atsumu | k. akaashi
another cliché beginning for the person you are right now - the MSBY team manager - is that you’ve loved the miya atsumu since high school. it’s not like being the team’s manager isn’t your dream, you loved this job and had been dying to do it because you’ve loved volleyball, too. plus, you will have the opportunity to stay close and take care of the team, especially your crush who just merely thinks you are his best friend.
you first laid eyes on him when you were sitting alone on the subway, his dyed-blonde locks caught your attention as he first talked to you about the chase atlantic’s song you were listening to, he was cute, warm and friendly. at that moment, you were verified that he wasn’t the guy who was fond of his fan girls that everybody had been rumoring about. He eventually found out that you guys went to the same high school, so as to start a new beginning of your bonding friendship.
It wasn’t long until you finally realized that you might have adored the pretty setter a little too much than usual. his touches, his smile, the way he calls your name and his genuine characteristics when he was used to you being around seemed a little bit more easy to flutter your heart than every other day. Ever since then, you just hid your feelings and was grateful for what you got right then because you knew that if you confess, you couldn’t get this best friend treatment that you silently fell for for any longer.
You impressed yourself for even keep it until now. you and him are mature and beautiful, but you still can’t help but feel so ‘high school’ when you look at him. the least thing you could do for a friend (crush) is care for him through bottles of flavored electrolyte water, preparing his favorite after-practice snacks and even cool and soft towels to calm the heat down after a match. However, it seems like mr. miya doesn’t notice all of the hard work you did for him, he was so used to be taken care of by you that he accidentally failed to realize the special treatment only for him but nobody else.
“Hey, tired yet? you can call it a day for now if you want?” you smiled, hand over his bottle of water you prepared for him to the softly panting atsumu taking a break on the bench. He is quite preoccupied with his earlier techniques that he need to improve, he only spares you a glance then takes the bottle to drink without saying any words, you assume that he is in a bad mood.
“oh, and” you search for the thing in your bag. “here, your towel”
he nods and takes it, it makes you feel awkward. that’s… all…? You try to not overthink yourself, after all, it was quite a tense match, and the fact that your team will have an important volleyball game the next month proves his concerns are valid.
you watch atsumu leave when hinata shoyo came up to you.
“oh? isn’t that our manager?” you startle at his voice. “hehe, please don’t mind tsumu at all, please, he just got pissed because he made a mistake during practice” the sunshine grins, having him around surely just brighten everything up, because he is just so sweet and comfortable to be with.
“no, no,… I really don’t mind at all, actually” you know atsumu better than anyone so you don’t take his actions to heart sometimes, it’s just…
“oi, oi! I know what you’re thinking, I saw you overthere doing things for tsumu. This guy, honestly…” Hinata sure saw you earlier with enthusiasm written on all over your face while preparing those towels and bottles, he felt bad for you and decided to cheer you up regardless atsumu has just cracked your poor heart a little.
“It’s okay, hinata. thank you for checking on me!” you smile wide, so my efforts wasn’t invalidated at all, gratefully bow down to see the awkward hinata trying to stutter words out.
“no- no, don’t do that, you are our manager, that’s just nothing! besides, seeing you give tsumu so special treatment makes me real jealous!!” he huffs cutely. “I really want that flavored electrolyte water, too! what a shame he wouldn’t notice.”
you laugh sheepishly as you guys return to your dorms to rest. things have been going hard for you like crazy, the work amount weighing on your shoulders make it almost unbearable, but you still stay strong and put a warm smile on your face so nobody would notices. you have been thinking of retiring just in case the situation just got worse to the level of destroying your mental health. but, by thinking of your small joy of seeing atsumu everyday, you hesitated.
your sleepless nights start when the important games take a step closer, you overworked yourself and often feel burnt out, your time with atsumu narrows as you find it hard to start a conversation even in lunch break. atsumu does feel weird. why isn’t y/n sit with us? she is nowhere to be found these days.
“hey, tsum-tsum” said bokuto. “what do you think of y/n?” he said, putting a tray of food on the table while making his way to sit.
“y/n? what’s with her?” the fake blond raises a brow, munching on his food
“I think she’s so cute and thoughtful, base on her affection for you, i betcha she’s completely smitten” the owl laughs as the other teammates giggle along. “you should consider on dating her, what a waste if you don’t, she’s literally girlfriend material, same thoughts huh, hinata?” he winks and the tangerine head give him back a thumbs up.
“dating y/n, huh?” atsumu laughs as if he doesn’t take bokuto’s statements seriously. “I don’t date my friends, you know. besides, y/n is just a close friend of mine, she ain’t my type”
“heartless tsumu… she worked so hard for you these days…” hinata fake crying when talking about you
“I know that she makes snacks and does things for me, but sometimes, that’s just unnecessary, i don’t need it to be all the damn time, it feels a little annoying, i just need to be alone to refresh my thoughts” he sighs. “now you told me to consider on dating her, i wouldn’t know how long i can take it.”
now there is dead silence following his statement, everybody just awkwardly continues finishing their lunch, and you do know eavesdropping is a thing that you shouldn’t do. but you did. before you even notice, hot streams cover your face and you feel your breath hitches. the coach sends you to check on the team at such wrong timing, you can’t face them, the voices earlier destroy your confidence, replace it with angst and hurt. so… what i did is just a bother to him, huh. you realize now, that you were such a dumbass trying to make him catch feeling by all of this. and with the tiniest amount of pride left, you back up a smile and step into the cafeteria, the atmosphere suddenly feels tense as everybody hasn’t been moving on since their last conversation, atsumu feels an uneasy feeling when he sees you behind him, guilt? he thinks.
“hey… coach sent me to check up on you guys, please be well rested at your dorms after lunch, we have practice match at 2pm, alright?” your voice evidently trembles, you try cover it up with some fake coughs. oh, who are you kidding? it’s atsumu miya we’re talking about. he first notices how your eyes are a bit swollen, have you been crying? your tired figure due to sleepless nights, the way you haven’t eaten properly shows right in front of his eyes. he suddenly felt a twinge in his heart, in which moment he never wanted to see you like this, ever again. but, what’s all this for? he doesn’t like you… right? because- you’re his best friend, and caring is what’s best friends do, am I correct?
you left the cafeteria. atsumu feels like his whole head is going to explode, he regrets what he said earlier, knowing seventy per cent that you might have listened to it. he is weak because of guilt and distaste. the group feels uneasy and moody all of a sudden.
“i haven’t told you this before but you’ve seen her now, tsumu… she overworked herself with this huge amount of work with nobody beside her, yet she still maintaining to take care of you with these small gestures.” hinata sighs heavily. “y/n told me not to tell you about her state so you can concentrate on practising, but I’m really worried because now she can’t even hide it anymore. I tried to help, but she pushed me away and told me that i should do my own practices as our game is going to start soon.”
hinata pats atsumu’s back before leaving as if he’s signalling him to make it up to you. atsumu started to cry at this point. how could he be so clueless? he didn’t even know that his best friend was undergoing such pressure, yet why does the term “best friend” sound so irritating? he felt like he had failed to protect you and worse, hurting your feelings and he regretted it, so badly.
The following day comes, atsumu's first task is to search for you. To his astonishment, you are once more nowhere to be found. he was so preoccupied, his spikes aren’t as good, and he could not concentrate on practising, the coach sent him out, and gave him a moment to rethink by himself. and so, he reaches a staff, asking for information about you.
“Y/n? oh… she’s at the infirmary, we noticed her devastated state so we sent her to the doctor a while ago. now think about it I might write a report to the coach asking him to reduce the amount of work she’s handling.”
“thank you, kind sir. may I be the one who’ll write the report? I’m sure I could convince the coach.”
as the man nods, atsumu bowed goodbye to him and sprints to the infirmary where you’re at. he knows, that if anybody should write a report for you, it must be him. he must protect you because he has just realised it now, he likes you a lot more than he could imagine.
“Y/N!” atsumu slams the door open, he faces you with your eyes widened, startled by the bright window.
“tsumu…?” you softly speak.
atsumu in front of your eyes is the atsumu who tries to hold back his tears, biting his bottom lip as the poor heart lurching somewhere in his stomach but somehow still happy because he has found you.
“hey…” he kneels down on one knee beside you. “i’m sorry, angel” his hand softly squishes the smaller one, it holds back gently on his’
in all of the things you dislike, what you utterly don’t want to deal with is your emotions when you see atsumu looking so vulnerable like this. you instinctually grab a tissue and wipe off the sweat drop on his forehead the moment you see it, atsumu’s worried expression won’t vanish unless you speak up something.
“hey…” you smile. “don’t worry, I’m okay now, tsumu” you fondly touch his face with a hand, and he sinks in your touch, eyes glittering. atsumu intentionally plants a soft kiss on your warm palm and watches you go weak for him.
“i like you, y/n” he sighs. “i don’t want us to be just friends. i want to protect you, want to be the kind of guy who mentally support his girl to help her cope with any pressure.”
he looks up to see your widened eyes, without a response, he continues.
“i’m sorry i said the things i didn’t mean when you were there, I was just…" he gulps nervously and you sigh.
"tsumu... if it's too much for you to bear, maybe i should stop doing those things, okay?" you scoff bitterly, he becomes panic
“no, no, no,... i really like the way you care for me, please, i want your attention. please keep doing it. don’t get tired of me…”
you can feel the pulse bumping in your nerves, your heart flutters, and blood rushes into your cheeks just by hearing his confession. you kneel down beside him, fighting back the tears but then you can’t, so you squish him in a hug. atsumu holds you back as you start sobbing on his white shirt, inhales fondly your intoxicating smell and pats rhythmically on your back
“there, there, my angel. i’m here now. i’m sorry i’m late. let me make this up for you, yeah?” he chuckles.
atsumu loves his girlfriend. after hearing you ramble about your tight schedule, he immediately writes a report based on your experience to inform the coach about your condition so that everyone can share in your responsibilities instead of you having to handle everything alone. it wasn’t that long for the msby mates to realize you guys are together, he wrote in that report that he is your boyfriend, anyway.
“you nailed it, tsumu-kun” hinata bumps him with a thumbs up, atsumu responds with a sheepish grin while bokuto laughs beside him and sakusa just doesn’t really give a shit.
he spots you standing on the opposite road near the brand new cafe, waving back to him smiling, “nah, gotta run. gonna treat my girlfriend with extra pastry today.”
i guess he is the simp now.
© 2024 dreamesamu. all rights reserved.
a recommendation to cope with your broken heart <3
#txt submitted !!#haikyuu drabbles#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#haikyuu angst#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu hurt/comfort#haikyu x reader#haikyu fluff#haikyū!!#haikyuu fic#miya atsumu#atsumu fluff#atsumu headcanons#atsumu x reader#miya atsumu x reader#hq atsumu#hq x reader#hq imagines#haikyuu imagines#haikyu imagines#haikyu!!#hq#hq fluff#haikyuu atsumu#msby atsumu#atsumu miya#atsumu miya x reader
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I have this thought in my head of reader calling Connor "my heart" and Connor calling reader "lovely" and Jason calling Conner "bitch"
just a taste (again &. again drabble)
ft. yandere connor kent x reader w/ the batfamily.
masterlist ! reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.
— tw suggestive, making out scene. i need someone to draw what i envisioned for this omg... pls let this blow up i love connor and u guys seem to love him too hehe. if u guys want to see me write more of these (w/ other characters) pls do comment below!
the 90's version of connor will have no filter in front of your ex-family and will literally appear right beside you moments before tim could drag your ass back to the manor, your already vulnerable state panicking at what seems to be a sleep inducing drug that he'll soon inject into your system.
but your boyfriend, kon, is one step ahead of your entire family, already having planned against them shall they ever abduct you.
he'll greet you with a flirtatious smile, even biting his lips as he checks you out, eyes flittering throughout your entire body like it was you were a glamorous display of meat for him, ignoring your brother's presence while at it.
"hello to my lovely darling!~" is what he tells you with a purr in his tone, kissing your cheeks for what seems longer than a second, hands immediately encasing your waist right before tim could make a show of grabbing your wrist. your boyfriend's grip is tight but comforting at the same time. you feel like you don't deserve it but if you voice out your insecurities now then you'll only find yourself smothered with kisses; him flirting with you in front of your supposed abductors would only worsen the situation. but you don't feel too anxious right now, because he's kneading the soft flesh of your waist, rubbing sensually in up and down strokes as if making a show in front of tim and the countless of cameras that litter the public space.
it's his way of telling you that you don't have to worry about anything but his affection, and his way of telling your family to 'fuck off, don't bother our moment together'.
you reciprocate with a hasty kiss to his lips, ignoring the side eye and the smug grin he gives to your brother after.
"hello to you too, my heart..." you fight back the urge to melt right into him, but it seems like he could easily read your mind, his hand settling itself into your head comfortably, scratching your scalp with well-timed precision whilst he leans your head right against his chest, right where you can hear the soft thumping of his heart.
what a flirt.
but you expect it. after all, he's the same guy who brags about your relationship to anyone and everyone he knows. it's no wonder tim easily tracked your location to the same place where connor lives, every puzzle seemingly being put into place.
when you had both caught bruce wayne tailing after you when you had gone on a date with him, it was connor who immediately devised a plan after he had to calm you down from panicking.
your lover is willing to sacrifice everything for you.
so it's not a surprise to you that his next course of action was to shamelessly take you flying away with him, off to somewhere desolate where he knows your family couldn't easily track you in, somewhere only you two kept a secret from everybody; a shared house, if you will.
nothing is shocking about what he had done...
... not until his grip on your body provides enough opportunities for him to just, make out with you then and there, tongue and all, without a care if your brother bears witness to his shameless display of lusting towards you.
what a prideful asshole he is, but he's your asshole now. and you can't bring it in yourself to reprimand him, enjoying the sweet sounds of your lips smacking in tandem and the taste of your favorite brand of coffee in his saliva as you two soar off into the air making out, exploring each other's body; your hand finding each other on his neck, another on his head, pushing him further near you, until your noses touched and until you struggle to breath, tongues lapping in tandem, refusing even a second of reprieve, even allowing him to bite your lips teasingly.
you love it when he uses his charms to take you away from the stress of your current life.
it was a distraction for both you and him, from the thought of your family turning kon into their new target as he defiles what little innocence they thought you had.
yet you enjoy this life, and you'd rather not come back to the stuffy manor, especially not right after kon offers you a taste of what you had never experienced; love.
and you embrace the giddy thumps of your heart for once with all the joy in the world, because you're not alone anymore in your own personal endeavors; you finally have someone. and that someone is your boyfriend who's always there for you, at the right time in all the wrong moments.
and kon? he especially enjoys using his superhearing just to eavesdrop on his ex-friend's seething because he was far too late, he loves hearing the growl on jason's voice over the comms as he calls connor a bitch, a seething pile of trash for taking away from them. he loves being an audience to their well deserved suffering. but...
but he can't focus solely on them, no, not when he's barely finished devouring every drop of saliva his eye candy offers him.
... ah, he loves it when you give yourself so willingly to him, when you let him wrap his arms around your body without fear he would hurt you, when you allow his hands to explore further below, fingers dangerously close to your thighs as it kneads the meat from your hips.
connor is never letting the world take you away from him.
it was you who parted first from the kiss, a string of liquid dispersing from both your swollen lips. if it wasn't for the fact you both are still high up in the air, you wouldn't doubt that your boyfriend wouldn't hesitate to undress you then and there.
but he could control himself for now, just for now.
'oh, babe... whatever you're doing to me is so irresistible.'
whatever happens after in your shared home is a different matter.
#🍨... yael's talking#🧁... yael's misc.#series: again & again#yandere superboy#yandere batfam#yandere dc#yandere bruce wayne#yandere tim drake#yandere jason todd#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x gn reader#yandere x male reader#yandere x y/n#yandere x you#yandere x darling#platonic yandere#romantic yandere#male yandere#tw suggestive#yandere conner kent#yandere conner kent x reader
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One of Your Girls
Summary: When Ellie’s usual filming partner tells her she’s gotten into a relationship, she ends up needing to find a new one, who better than her sweet little roommate? Only problem is, her content is quite…special.
an: I’m keeping this short and sweet bc I’m honestly desperate for this. Anyways, enjoy camgirl!Ellie, hehe. Mwah love you (also HAPPY HALLOWEEN)
Warnings: smut!! MDNI!! 18+, camgirl!Ellie, Ellie and reader are roommates in this one, biker!Ellie bc I felt like it (more of it in future chapters), mentions of strap usage, mentions of the word ‘cock’, ROSE TOY, fingering, dirty talk, praise, mentions of sex work, filming of said intercourse, let me know if I missed anything! (Not proofreading)
Part 2 is out now! Read here!!, and part 3 here!!
Ellie groaned softly, her tattooed hand gripping the girls plush hips, her own bottom lip tugged between her teeth as she watched the girls ass bounce with every thrust. The way she whined and moaned as Ellie fucked into her mercilessly, perfectly manicured hands gripping her bedsheets as she tried her best to hang on, babbling incoherent words, ones that Ellie could only make out to be asking her to go faster.
Ellie’s hand came around to the girls ass, giving it a firm squeeze before she spanked her hard, receiving a loud whine from the girl. “You fuckin’ like that…don’t you…such a fucking slut” she groaned out, voice low and sensual, dripping with the sound of want and dominance.
Ellie smirked softly as the girl nodded eagerly, immediately agreeing with Ellie, agreeing with the vile things she said. It was so easy, getting them to say and do exactly what she wanted, especially when she had them like this, desperate to cum.
The sound of her laptop ringing made her smirk, her eyes drifting over to the camera that was pointed towards them. “Bet you all wish that was you, huh? Tell them how good it feels baby…go on” she hummed out, head cocking to the side as she watched the girl moan and whine beneath her.
As soon as she did, multiple dings started coming in through Ellie’s laptop, making her smirk softly. Her eyes never left the girl beneath her, her strap bumping against her clit with every thrust, making her groan loudly, knowing she was just as close as the moaning girl beneath her was.
And soon, they were both a moaning mess. Ellie’s strong hands gripped her hips as she hunched over her back, pressing soft kisses against her sweaty skin, massaging her ass, knowing she must have been sore from all the spanking she’d done.
By the time she straightened out her back to look at the chat, she chuckled softly, pushing her brown fringe from her sweaty face as she slowly pulled out of the girl, causing her to whine.
“I don’t think so…that’s more than enough for the both of us” she rasped out, a soft hiss leaving her lips as she looked down at the strap that was soiled with the girls arousal.
She reached over, only her lips visible to the camera as she let her hand hover over the button that allowed her to stop recording. “Thanks for joining, guys…always appreciate putting on a show for you” she hummed out, flashing her audience a toothy grin. She turned around, looking at the girl that was nearly passed out completely on her bed. She let out a soft chuckle, tugging off the strap that hung on her lower half, tossing it to the side before she crawled over to the girl, both of her arms caging the girl on either side of her body, knuckles pressing into her mattress as she dipped her head down, lips ghosting over her ear.
“You with me, baby? Stream ended already” she hummed out softly to the girl, which earned a soft noise from her in return. Ellie chuckled, giving her ass a gentle spank before she pushed herself off of the bed, a low groan leaving her lips as she stretched out her sore limbs. She watched was the girl on her bed slowly came to, lifting herself up slowly, She smirked to herself, chest always swelling in pride whenever she caught sight of the aftermath of one of her girls, how she’d wrecked them completely.
She was still wearing nothing but her sports bra and a pair of cotton underwear, so she moved to her closet and grabbed a t shirt and sweats, turning to the girl on the bed who was now sitting up with a fucked out expression that Ellie loved so much. She chuckled, taking slow strides towards her. Her strong hand came up to rub her head softly, a soft hum leaving her chest.
“Went too hard on you?” She questioned softly, slightly worried that she’d pushed the girl too far. She felt a sense of relief when she shook her head, a soft yawn leaving her lips which cause Ellie to smile. “Get outta here…I’ll call you an Uber” she promised, to which the girl sleepily nodded and got up from Ellie’s bed, leading Ellie to her bedroom door so that she could leave.
You on the other hand? You were cuddled up on the couch, your favorite blanket wrapped around your body , a twizzler perched between your lips, the bag cuddled into your chest as you stared intently at the glimmering vampire on your tv.
And that was the difference between you and your roommate, because while she was fucking her pretty filming partner into the mattress, making enough from her streams and videos to pay the rent entirely for both of you, you were binging another shitty movie franchise for the thousandth time.
You figured they’d be making their way out of Ellie’s bedroom once you heard the knocking of Ellie’s headboard against the wall stop, and the breathy little whines of her partner, Julia, came to a stop as well. And like clockwork, a very happy looking Julia was coming out of Ellie’s room, Ellie following close behind.
You giggled softly, Julia walking over to the couch and plopping down next to you, resting her head on your shoulder. You cradled her head against you, eyes craning up at Ellie as you gave her a fake disapproving look.
“Jesus, Ellie….the hell did you do to her?” You try sternly, which makes Ellie roll her eyes. Shes leaned up against the wall, arms crossed as she eyes the both of you. “Please…she’s the one that told me I wasn’t going hard enough” she argued. You giggled softly, looking down and giving Julia a gentle nudge.
“You’ll be good to go home, baby? You know you can stay here if you need to” you reassure her. Ellie cuts her off before she can respond, “no she can’t” she quickly interrupts, to which you roll your eyes. Julia giggles lazily, pushing her head off of your shoulder as she hummed softly. “Ellie knows if I stay she won’t be getting any sleep” Julia teased gently, giving Ellie a soft smirk before she got up off the couch, giving a big stretch paired with another yawn before she nodded her head towards the door while looking at Ellie.
“Walk me out?” She hummed softly. Ellie nodded, pushing herself off of her spot against the wall and walking Julia to the door. From your spot on the couch, you can hear soft mumbling between the two, paired with the soft sounds of a kiss before Julia leaves.
To anyone else, the scene would look like a girl sending her girlfriend off after a night of hanging out. A happy couple who were definitely in love with one another. It made it very clear why people loved seeing them together on Ellie’s streams.
They looked so good together.
You tried not to stare, your eyes quickly averting back to the tv, trying to catch up with whatever was happening in the movie you were watching. Ellie made her way over to you, plopping down onto the couch next to you with a loud sigh. Her hand came up to you, tugging the twizzler out of your mouth and promptly putting it in her own, which makes you huff softly.
“Back off. Go find a post sex snack somewhere else” you tease her, yet still grabbing the bag and putting it between the both of you. Ellie chuckled softly, her eyes never leaving the tv. She groaned softly, her hand shoving into the bag and grabbing a handful of red ropes before she nodded her head to the tv.
“How can you watch this shit, man? They don’t even fuck properly” she complained. You hum softly, nodding slowly as if you were processing her words. “I would agree….but does the world really need to see that? Because personally I’m fine without it” you hummed out, giving a proper response as if the conversation really even needed it.
Ellie shrugged, moving down to grab your legs and put them on her lap, her tattooed hand massaging your calves slowly as she continued watching the movie and munching on your candy. “Hm…who knows” she hummed out before you two fell into a comfortable silence, and continued watching the movie.
And that’s how things usually went with you and your roommate. She’d film something, you’d be out in the living room watching a movie, and she’d come out when she was finished and join you. The night never went without cuddling from Ellie’s end, and yours of course. Ellie always ran cold, constantly seeking out your warmth whenever you were close. The night would usually end with one of you falling asleep on the other, and staying there until the wee hours of the morning, that is until you woke up first, tugging Ellie off the couch and sending her to her room, which almost always resulted in her whining for you to come with her.
That’s what life was like with your cam girl roommate.
You let out a soft sigh as you walked into your apartment, a soft frown on your lips as you began tugging away at the layers on your body. It was the one thing you hated about the colder months, having to leave the cozy record store you worked at, out into the cold air, eager to get to your even cozier home.
You looked down at the little entrance rug on your floor, noticing that Ellie’s sneakers were tossed next to them, and her helmet was on the entry table, meaning she was home. It was Friday night, so it meant she’d be filming today.
Or at least, she was supposed to.
If you recalled from the many annoyed little rants from your roommates end, Julia had been flaking on her for the past few weeks. Apparently, it started out with her missing one day of filming, telling Ellie she had something she couldn’t miss. Ellie mentioned she was vague about that ‘something’. Then, she started flaking multiple days in a row, skipping out on the schedule Ellie had organized for the both of them to film together, something they’d agreed on very early on in their friendship.
That was three weeks ago.
It was getting to the point where you couldn’t really remember the last time you’d send Julia, and to be quite honest, you missed her. Sure, she was the girl your roommate fucked regularly, but it was a job, at least that’s how Ellie put it, and you truthfully saw Julia as a friend, always wishing she’d stick around after she and Ellie were done to hang out. Ellie weirdly never allowed that to happen though. You never questioned it.
The lack of banging and moaning was a clear indication that Julia’s three week streak had turned into four, and you most likely wouldn’t be seeing her tonight.
Regardless, you knew Ellie was home, but you opted to leave her alone until she made her way to you. It was frustrating for her, and you could sympathize with that, of course.
After you walked out of the bathroom, freshly showered and in your favorite pjs (the ones you always saved for the weekends, Friday nights to be exact), you moved to the fridge in your little kitchen. You grabbed a random can of alcohol, needing to blow off a bit of steam before also grabbing a bag of chips, tucking it between your arm and moving to the living room.
And now, for the weekend festivities to commence.
Ellie most likely heard all of the shuffling that came with you getting home, because as soon as you’ve settled onto the couch, your favorite blanket draped over your bare legs, she’s emerging from her bedroom.
You can tell she’s annoyed, because there’s a faint frown on her lips, and her eyebrows are slightly furrowed. You decide not to say anything, since you know it’ll most likely receive nothing but a short hum from her end.
It’s sort of like the night is in reverse, because she’s plopping down next to you, grabbing your snacks, shoving her hand into the bag quietly as she waits for you to put something on, but there’s no Julia, only a frustrated Ellie sitting next to you.
You eye her for a moment before you begin flipping through the various movies on your screen. “Julia cancelled again, hm?” You question softly, yet you know the answer to that question already.
Ellie scoffs softly. “Yep…and you’ll never guess why” she mumbles out, words hanging in the air as you continue scrolling through, waiting for the big reveal.
“She’s got a fucking girlfriend now” she groans out.
You weren’t entirely sure what the reason behind Julia’s disappearance was going to be. You’d thought about it a bit, muling over the mystery and trying to figure out why she’d suddenly dropped the gig out of nowhere. You thought it might’ve been schedule conflicts, or maybe she’d gotten a new job, or maybe she just wasn’t for the work anymore, which was entirely understandable.
But a girlfriend? That was not on your list at all.
Your eyes went a bit wide for a moment before they flickered towards Ellie, watching as she let out a soft huff before shoving a handful of Cheetos into her mouth.
What would you even say? Comfort her? Say nothing? It was quite the unique situation. It wasn’t as if Julia and Ellie were dating, they were…coworkers, partners that worked on something together because they had good chemistry and it was good money. They were barely even friends, so how on earth were you supposed to comfort your annoyed friend with such a strange situation?
Your lack of a response leaves a wider gap for Ellie to continue speaking, so she does.
“And it’s not even about it the fuckin content anymore, you know? I can do solo, that’s fine….she just didn’t even have the decency to tell me that’s annoying” she complained, to which you nodded slowly as you gave her your full attention.
She lets out a long sigh before her words fell into a mumble. “I’m fuckin….im pent up, man….fucking yourself only gets you so far” she admitted, making you freeze for a moment.
Because sure, you and Ellie had been living together for a while now, there really weren’t any boundaries you hadn’t crossed. You were very familiar with Ellie’s side job, and you were fully supportive of that. You knew that it was beneficial to her in more ways than money, and of course it was! Sex was healthy. You knew that after a week filled with the chaos of the world and her main 9 to 5, she needed to blow off some steam from time to time, which is where her second job came in handy.
But fuck…hearing her talk that way flipped you upside down for a moment.
You cleared your throat, trying to find the right words for your friend before you gave her a gentle nod. “I know what you mean…is there anyone else you can call? At least just for a quick round” you tried, knowing Ellie definitely had no problems with finding a pretty girl to consume her time if needed.
She merely sighed, nose scrunching a bit at your suggestion before she shook her head. “One night stands freak me out…” she explained, a soft puff of air blowing past her lips as she slumped further into the couch, staring up at the ceiling as her dark hoodie engulfed her body, swallowing her up.
You two sat there in silence, a soft pout on your lips as you racked your brain for another solution. You felt bad, because while you usually took from your own personal experiences to help your friends out when they were in a pinch, you just couldn’t remember the last time you were in a situation even close to Ellie’s.
And it’s like she’s reading your mind, because suddenly she speaks up again.
“Why don’t you film with me tonight?” She blurts out, clearly not giving her words any second thought before they were passing through her lips.
You can’t control the laugh that escapes your lips, quickly snatching your chips from Ellie’s lap as you continue scrolling through the movies on the tv, not even giving Ellie’s words a second thought. “That’s cute. What about that girl you went on a date with? Jasmine? Man you really have a thing with the letter J, huh” you teased, grabbing your blanket and tugging it further over your body once you settled on a movie.
Ellie groaned softly, grabbing the remote control and turning off the tv entirely as she sat forward a bit, body facing yours as she tried getting your attention.
“I’m serious. Who better than you? We know each other, you aren’t busy tonight, not to mention you’re hot as fuck.” She breathed out shamelessly
You try to ignore the way your chest burns at her words, warmth radiating all throughout your body. Of course you thought the same of Ellie, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t gawk at your roommate from time to time, but that’s the thing, she was your roommate. You never truly let your mind wander there, knowing that what you and Ellie had, wasn’t that.
You figured that if you don’t say anything, she’ll just drop it.
She doesn’t.
She groans softly, tugging your blanket off of your body, which earns a wide eyed look from you and a soft gasp, appalled that Ellie would ever interrupt your post work cozy time, even if she was basically asking to fuck you in front of thousands of people….digitally.
Once you’re looking at her, you can see just how serious she is. Her green eyes are wide and almost excited looking, pink bottom lip tugged between her perfect teeth, eyeing you closely, eager for your response. You can tell she wasn’t even nervous if she’d crossed any boundaries, she just wanted to see if her genius idea was as smart as she thought it was.
You let out a soft whine, throwing your head bag into the couch as if to break her intense gaze. “Come on Ellie, seriously? We both know I’m not what your audience wants to see….they want a Julia! You can’t just go from her to me and expect the same response” you explain, hating that you even had to explain this to Ellie.
Ellie looks like a kicked puppy when she registers her words, genuine shock on her face for a moment before she’s immediately arguing with you. “Are you fucking kidding me? Have you seen yourself?? How could anyone not want to see you absolutely wrecked on camera? Jesus, I’d pay big money for that shit” she huffed out, clearly angry with the way you were speaking about yourself.
You have the urge to argue against her again, complain that she’s only saying that stuff to you because she’s your friend and she knows it’ll get what she wants, which you know is a lie. Ellie could have anyone to be her filming partner, and you knew that. There was no reason at all for her to lie.
Before you can though, she’s grabbing your wrists and tugging you up so that you’re sitting up and facing her. Her pink tongue darts out to lick her lips for a moment before she sighs softly.
“I’m not gonna force you into anything…if you want me to stop, I’ll drop it and we can never talk about this again…” she assures you, those big green eyes filled with the truth before she continued speaking again.
“But I’m just asking…as a friend…we can try filming a video, and if you don’t like it, I’ll scrap it completely and look for someone else” she explained, words slow as she wanted you to hear everything, hear all of it and truly understand how honest she was being.
“I wouldn’t suggest it if I knew it wouldn’t work” she hummed out again, and her soft words finally make you move your gaze from the floor to her eyes, it makes your breath hitch for a moment because Jesus, why does your roommate have to be so goddamn intense?
You think about it for a moment, weighing out all the pros and the cons, trying to truly contemplate what could actually go wrong if you did agree to do it. Ellie was fully anonymous online, as much as she could be, and you knew she’d protect you entirely as well.
Plus…you always sort of wanted to know what it’d be like to experience what one of Ellie’s girls experienced behind her bedroom door.
You inhaled deeply, knowing that there was a huge chance that everything could change once you did this, yet something in you told you that it’d all be alright regardless.
You gave her a slow nod before cracking a half smile. “You better make this worth my while, Williams” you teased, which makes her chuckle softly, a teasing smirk playing on her lips as she nodded slowly.
“You’ve seen the aftermath of my work, you won’t be disappointed, baby”
You don’t usually go to Ellie’s bedroom.
Mainly because it’s where she films, and not that anything is wrong with that, you’d just hate to overstep. If you two ever wanted to hang out somewhere other than the living room, your room was the place to go.
Sitting on Ellie’s bed, you realize how professional about this she really is. Her bedroom is dimly lit, already setting the mood for you both. Her bed is made, her laptop is open, and she’s setting up her camera on her tripod next to you, angling it so that it’s a bit more to the side instead of aimed directly in front of you.
Once she’s finished, she nods to herself, happy with the placement. She leaves for a moment, making you frown in confusion, but she returns with a few bottles of water, setting them on her desk before she turns towards you, her hands clasped together as she tried to think of anything else the two of you might have needed.
The image of you quietly sitting on her bed catches her attention, and she quickly turns the camera away from you, moving to sit next to you. “Don’t worry..it isn’t on yet” she promises you, a soft smile on her lips. She can see the way you’re quietly taking it all in, understanding fully.
“It’s always scary doing it for the first time” she reassured you, to which to rolled your eyes, giving her a playful nudge. “Please, you’re acting like you’re taking my virginity” you teased her. Your words make her chuckle softly, a sense of relief washing over her when she sees how normal this is, how you two haven’t changed yet despite the circumstances.
She eyes you for a moment, a bit of silence washing over you before she rests a gentle hand on your thigh. “Remember…we can stop at any time” she promises, giving you a slow nod. You eye her, feeling your heart swell for a moment before you nod as well, giving her a soft smile. “I trust you, Ellie” you hum softly.
Ellie gives you a smile in return before she sighs softly, eyes scanning over your face for a moment before they settle on your lips. She tugs her own between her teeth before she looks up at you hesitantly. “Gonna…warm you up a bit before we start, okay?” She explained gently, to which you give her a soft nod, eyes never leaving her green ones.
You’ve always thought about what it would feel like to kiss Ellie.
It wasn’t a lingering thought. It came from time to time, whenever you got too drunk, or you were in that delicious state between sleep and wake and didn’t have much control over where your thoughts drifted off too, you’d think about your roommate, and how soft her lips looked. You’d think about how good she probably made all those girls feel while they were filming.
But everything that you might have imagined in that past couldn’t come close to this.
She tastes of what you can only describe to be, Ellie. Her tongue is soft and warm, and so fucking wet. She explores your mouth slowly, mouth moving against yours in a way that clearly indicates how fucking good of a kisser she is. Your mind is already fuzzy, and you’re embarrassed by the fact that she’s barely kissed you and you can already feel your arousal pooling in your panties.
Ellie groans into your mouth, one of her hands coming down to give your waist a squeeze before she pushes you back a bit to lay on her bed. You gasp softly when you feel her knee push between your legs, slowly moving against your core. She takes the opportunity to push her tongue further into your mouth, dominating the kiss as her large hands roam your body, feeling and squeezing, caressing you in a way you can’t remember the last time was done.
It’s a simple make out session, but you feel like you’ll lose your mind if you don’t have her soon. Her toned thighs are moving against the thin fabric of your pajama shorts, her soft lips working against yours, deepening the kiss with each passing moment. It went from soft, to needy so quickly, it made your head spin.
You aren’t sure how long she had you there, her thigh grinding into your core, hands massaging your hips, her mouth swallowing all of the needy whines and huffs you gave her. Your hands were in her hair, tugging and keeping her close, it mad her smirk against your lips. Soon, you’re whining even more because she’s breaking the kiss and staring down at you. She’s trying to catch her breath just like you are, your own chest rising and falling a bit quickly, glossy eyes staring up at her with need.
God, Ellie loves that fucking look.
“Wanna keep going?” She asks, and you haven’t been so sure of anything in your entire life. You give her an eager nod, to which she chuckles softly, leaning down and pressing another soft kiss to your lips before she pushes herself off of your body, and goes over to set up the camera.
You blink a few times, almost taken back by everything that was happening. You sit up on the bed, watching as Ellie concentrates on setting up the camera. Its like she could do anything right now, and you’ll be on her knees.
Because why the fuck does she look so hot turning on a camera.
You chalk it up to just being so horny you feel like you’ll pass out.
Ellie nods to herself before she looks over at you, nodding her head towards where she’s standing. “Come stand over here with me” she directs you, and you’re obediently walking over to stand next to Ellie, eyes looking down at the screen on the expensive camera.
You can see where it’s pointed at towards the bed, standing a little ways from the foot of the bed, giving it a much more authentic look than if it were to be aimed right at you and Ellie. You feel a gentle hand on your hip, and Ellie brings your hand up to a little button on the edge of the camera, her lips dipping down to rest against your ear.
“I’m gonna go sit down, and when you’re ready, I need you to press this button…alright baby?” She hums softly against you, giving your waist a gentle squeeze.
You can’t even speak, giving the girl a gentle nod, to which she chuckles softly before she pats your waist gently. “Good girl…” she mumbles against you before she leaves your side.
On the other side of the camera, you watch as Ellie goes to sit on the bed, tugging her hoodie off to leave her only in her t shirt and sweats. Her legs are spread. You watch as she reaches next to her bed, digging around in her bedside table before she pulls out a small little black bag. She rests either one of her arms on her thighs, looking at you and giving you a silent nod.
You give her one back before you press the button on the camera. You hear a soft beep come from it, and from Ellie’s side, there’s a little red light, showing her that the camera was recording.
On the little screen on the camera, you can see that Ellie has angled it so that it just cuts off her face, only a sliver of her chin and lips visible, along with the rest of her body, ensuring that no one will see her face or yours while you both do this.
She gives you a small smile before she pats her lap softly. “C’mere baby…don’t be shy” she hummed out, voice low and dripping with so much lust, it made you squeeze your thighs together.
You gave her a soft nod before you slowly made your way over to her, standing between her spread legs and resting both of your hands around her, toying with the hair at the nape of her neck softly.
Ellie stared up at you, her own pupils blown out as she tugged her bottom lip between her teeth. Her hands slide up from your hips, slowly creeping up your shirt. It makes you shudder softly, a quiet whine leaving your lips as you practically begged for her to touch you more. This makes her chuckle softly.
“Needy already? I’ve barely even touched you…” she teases you gentle, which causes you to pout. She hums, slowly pushing your shirt up a bit before she tugs your pajama shorts down your body. Once they’re off, she moves onto slowly pushing your shirt up your body, kissing your exposed skin once it’s there for her, before she tosses it somewhere else in her room.
And suddenly, you’re almost completely naked in front of her.
It makes you frown softly, feeling so bare in front of her. Your arms quickly move up to your chest, covering yourself from. She quickly gives your hips a gentle squeeze, leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to your cleavage.
“Hey…don’t hide from me baby…it’s all right” she reassures you. You can tell it’s Ellie, and not some act she was putting on for the camera.
It was a silent gesture that you could trust her.
You let out a soft sigh of relief before you drop your hands, allowing them to take place back on Ellie’s shoulders. She lets out a hiss when you do, because she can finally get a good look at you this way.
“Fuck me…such a pretty fuckin girl…” she groans softly to herself, barely loud enough for the camera to pick up. She quickly leans in, attaching her lips to one of your nipples and giving it a gentle suck, which earns a soft moan from your end.
Her mouth feels almost as good as it felt when she was kissing you, so warm, her tongue swirling around your sensitive nipple before letting it go with a pop and moving over to the other, giving it the same amount of attention.
Her green eyes are on yours the entire time as she suckles your nipples, your head spinning as you watch her below you worshiping both soft mounds. You’re sure you can die like this, with Ellie’s mouth littering your entire body with kisses, her tongue swirling around various parts of you, making your knees wobble beneath you.
She groans softly, letting your nipple go from her mouth before she gives your waist a gentle squeeze.
“Wanna play with you a little bit, pretty girl….will you let me?” She asks genuinely, the girl still trying to make sure you’re okay with all of this, and that you’ll let her make you feel good.
You nod eagerly, because it’s come to a shock to you that you haven’t started begging yet.
“Do whatever you want to me…” you mumble softly, almost in a daze as you stare down at the girl, your own pupils blown out with lust, lips already forming a needy little pout. It makes Ellie chuckle, and she nods before she gently turns you around, and puts you to sit between her legs on the bed.
The image of her thighs spread outside of yours makes you squeeze your legs together. She hums softly once she notices, her strong hands gripping your hips softly before she slowly begins tugging your panties off. She pulls you back a bit into her chest, forcing you to lift your hips gently before she’s tugging your panties off completely and tossing them to the side.
“Let’s take a look then, hm?” She hums out softly against your ears before she pulls your thighs apart.
She groans softly, because while her head is resting on your shoulder, looking down at the mess between her legs, you’re so wet you can audibly hear your sopping wet lips part when your legs are spread. It makes you whine, and you try to close your legs out of habit, but Ellie is quickly pushing them even further apart.
“Fuck…don’t hide this from me, baby…..need to take care of you…” she groans against your ear, her lips ghosting against your skin, warm breath wafting onto your face as one of her hands slowly creeps down between your legs.
When she’s there, she uses her fingers to spread your lips apart, giving the camera a good view at your glossy pussy, the dim lighting of her bedroom making it even more apparent. She hisses softly to herself as her fingers go to your swollen clit, slowly rubbing small circles into the little bundle of nerves.
This alone has you wiggling in her grasp, your hands gripping her thighs as she slowly works on your needy pussy. She chuckles softly, pressing a soft kiss against your neck as she brings her other hand to your boob, massaging the skin before pinching your nipple.
“I’m barely doing anything yet, sweetheart…gotta contain yourself” she sighs against your skin before she presses another kiss to your cheek. “M’just warming you up…” she mumbles softly before her hand leaves your sopping cunt, which earns a needy whine from you.
It makes her chuckle, and she reaches beside you to grab the little black bag that she had gotten out before filming. “You’ll like this much more than just my fingers, princess…” she promises, her lips pressing soft kisses to your neck and cheek. Your eyes are trained intently on the bag, eager to see what it is she’ll take out. When she finally does, you feel like you’ll scream.
It’s the fucking rose toy.
You’d been meaning to buy one yourself, going on and on to Ellie about how everyone had been raving about it on the Internet, but it had been sold out virtually everywhere and you just couldn’t seem to get your hands on one.
But as usual, Ellie always had tricks up her sleeve.
You’re so glad the camera doesn’t catch your face, because your eyes are so wide, you probably look like a Halloween mask. Ellie chuckles softly as she feels you stiffen in her lap, giving your waist a gentle squeeze. “Wanted to try this one for a while, didn’t you baby?” She hums against you, and it makes you moan softly before giving her a nod, squeezing your legs together.
Because since when the hell has Ellie paid that much attention to you?
You try to make a mental note to bring it up later, but you aren’t sure how well your memory will stand right now.
Ellie hums softly as she presses one of the buttons on it, holding it down until the light on the bottom begins to blink, meaning it’s on. She then goes onto pressing the button below it, letting it go onto the lowest setting. The buzzing alone makes you whine, eager to have the toy used on you. Ellie smirks softly, bringing the toy down to your nipple, letting it suck on you gently.
You let your head fall back on Ellie’s shoulder, back arching, pushing your boob further into the toy. You almost feel angry that you haven’t bought the toy sooner, because god, it’s the closest fucking thing to Ellie’s mouth, and it makes you moan like an animal in heat underneath her.
Ellie’s eyes never left yours, watching your every move. She loved how responsive you were, how everything she did earned little whines and huffs from your end. It makes her buck her hips up into your back, needy for her own bit of friction against her aching cunt.
“That’s it, baby….such a good girl…” she praises you, making you moan softly.
She slowly moves the toy from either one of your nipples, watching as you wiggle beneath her. This goes on for a a bit, before she begins moving the toy down between your legs.
She hums, craning her neck down a bit to get a better view of your sopping cunt. She uses one hand to spread your lips, your puffy clit almost screaming for the toy, before she sets the mouth of the toy on it, letting it suck on your clit.
It’s truly like nothing you’ve ever felt, the suction is so strong, and it makes you grip Ellie’s thigh harder, your back arching, ass pushing against her core, making her moan softly into your ear.
Ellie groans, removing the toy for a moment to give you a break before she puts it back on, teasing you even further. She hums softly before her other hand comes down, pushing two fingers into your needy, wet little hole, which makes her groan.
“So fucking tight…we’re gonna have to do some practice for my cock, aren’t we baby…” she moaned softly in your ear, which makes you nod eagerly.
And you can’t really take it anymore, because her fingers feel so good fucking in and out of you, and the toy is sucking on your clit perfectly, so you turn your head a bit and catch Ellie’s lips in a needy kiss, tongue pushing into her mouth, eager to feel the warm, wet muscle again, like you had earlier.
This catches Ellie a bit off guard, however she immediately welcomes the kiss eagerly. It prompts her to finger fuck you faster, your body arching into her touch, into the toy. Her tongue was lapping at your mouth, the lewd noises from your cunt and from the kiss making it sound sinful in Ellie’s bedroom.
Your hand went up to the nape of her neck, tugging at her hair, keeping her close as you felt your orgasm growing closer and closer with each passing second.
You break the kiss for only a moment, head looking down to catch a glimpse of Ellie’s skilled fingers working on your poor little pussy.
“I’m….m’so close….f-fuuuuuck…” you moan out loudly as your head falls back against Ellie’s shoulders. She gives you a reassuring nod, turning up the intensity of the toy another notch as her fingers sped up, the girl just as eager as you for your orgasm.
“Come on baby…let go for me….such a good fucking girl for me…that’s it” she praised, her own hips rocking into your ass from behind as the rhythm of her fingers sped up.
And you wanted to hold on longer, let this last just a bit more so you didn’t have to let go of this pleasure so soon, but you just can’t. Because soon, your back is arching so painfully, and the orgasm feels so good it almost hurts, your eyesight nearly going white as it washes over you like electricity, a loud moan leaving your lips as you grip Ellie’s thigh so tightly, it’ll leave bruises.
Ellie moans with you, immediately turning off the toy and tossing it to the side once she feels your pussy flutter around her fingers, helping you ride out your orgasm without it being too much.
“Good girl…that’s my good girl…fuck…there we go” she groans softly, holding your body close to hers as she litters your throat and cheek with kisses, before her hand comes up, grabs your jaw and angles your face up to catch your lips in a deep, needy kiss, which you can only moan into and let her control completely.
After that, you aren’t really sure what happened. There’s spotty memories of Ellie slowly resting your spent body in her bed, getting up and turning off the camera, and then coming back to cuddle in bed with you.
But what you are sure of, is that you’re definitely doing this again with her.
#ellie williams#ellie williams smut#ellie williams x y/n#ellie williams x female reader#ellie williams x you#ellie tlou#ellie x y/n#ellie the last of us#ellie x you#ellie x fem reader#the last of us#tlou 2#tlou part 2
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