#hehe i said i'd do the thing
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it was no secret that atlas was not someone people could get close to usually, as he normally kept a distance from anyone that wasn' the band mates he had acquired over the centuries. so to see him be the one to bring someone onto the vip area was most definitely a surpsie, but he didn't let that stop him. the concert had come to an end, but he could still hear the fans wildly screaming as he exited to the side, placing his bass on the corner before making his way to run, fingers running through his hair to push them off his face — except dark brown and white strands seemed to stubbornly want to return to its place the moment he lowered his arm. " hey there, did you enjoy the show? "
@silkcode : closed starter .
#silkcode#atlas : threads .#hehe i said i'd do the thing#iM EXCITED#i hope this is ok <3#i spent so long tryna find a good pic of him running his fingers thru his hair dont @ me#i wanted a better one but oh well
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omg so like, Dazai and the shipping container incident with him getting shipped overseas got me thinking... (I am super late to reading it 😭)
Chuuya, unaware of what happened in the moment because he had been sent overseas himself for an international mission, and he had to go out and scout a foreign shipyard for illegal weapon shipments.
AT THE SAME TIME, he conveniently receives a message forward by Mori to be on the lookout for one of their own agents because a Port Mafia member had been taken hostage around the location Chuuya was in.
Chuuya's ??? because why hadn't he been notified that someone was also either on the same mission as him or had managed to be such a bumbling fool that they got caught by foreign enemies. ANYWAY, he keeps an eye out for anything suspicious while still working on his own mission when he sees a particular area of the shipyard had been surrounded by armed foreign criminals, so he's ready to go bust some ass when they all swing the shipping container doors open and barge in to see Dazai there.
Chuuya just facepalms himself in disbelief because he can't believe Dazai followed him all the way to another country (even though it was totally coincidental) but also, he's not even surprised that Dazai managed to get himself caught by the enemy. Again.
They kick some enemy ass and Dazai gets shipped back home on the next plane back to Yokohama, and Chuuya overhears Dazai complaining to Mori on the phone: "What about my home?!"
Omggg you read my silly shipping container fic hehe *hidesss* /silly
Thank you so much for this omg <333 I genuinely cackled. There really is no end with the shipping container shenanigans huh jknfjew
Lmao Mori telling him to be on the lookout for an agent without specifying that it's DAZAI so Chuuya can take this seriously pffff
I can imagine Chuuya's shocked then angry as heck face when he spots Dazai like,,, he'd probably do a double take at first being like "is that really who I think it is?" and it quickly turns to "Fuck it is who I think it is..."
Dazai would be adamant that that was part of his plan (when it really wasn't) and complain that Chuuya's ruined it and it is somehow Chuuya's fault that he has no home now fjsbfkjebaf
Which will earn him a (justified) kick to the head 😭😭
#btw anticidic I love ur mind sm can I borrow it#kjfnjkebkfj#silly teen skk scenarious are ruining my life hehe#“he can't believe Dazai followed him all the way to another country” Dazai *would* do that just to annoy Chuuya tho kjdbfkd#sorry Chuuya he's always gonna be your problem 😔#tysm again for the ask bestie! <3#I'm so late to replying to this so sorry#haven't been on tumblr for a while#hehe I'd love to brainstorm more on this hehe#this is super fun!! :D#bsd#skk#dazai osmau#chuuya nakahara#soukoku#silly#lmao#J's post#ask ❔#ask and answer#anyone feel free to hop in my inbox DON'T BE SHY#THIS IS PROBABLY MY FAVORITE THING IN THE WORLD#Dumbledore said calmly 😌✨
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"and I guess I'll just miss her ༊*·˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆ even though she isn't even really gone"
Young Avery doodle 💜-- Quote above is from a song. Avery uses they/them pronouns--
#very quick doodle sdfjkhsdf#they're very dear to me your honor#Remember how in my previous post#I said I'd do like 4 different things??#Yeah I did none of them#I mean#I guess this can count as a random doodle#But oc art was definitely not what I had in mind when I wrote that hahahhaa#I have another art in the works right now by the way TvT#Which basically inspired me to draw younger Avery#it's almost finished so uh hehe#art#artists on tumblr#doodle#oc#laursart
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Tastes staticy (Patreon)
#My art#Vectors ♥ My beloved#How do I always let these art styles sit by the wayside for so long! I love them!#In this case it was good for a number of reasons lol ♪ Firstly because I forgot my tablet pen and only that while I was out for the evening#Oops lol#But I was still very much in an art-expression mood and vectors are so so so friendly with my trackpad <3 Thank you lads haha#That said I did sketch this with regular brushes on my trackpad lol - and recorded it this time so you'll get to see what that looks like!#It's not really one way or t'other imo lol I've gotten fairly proficient so it's just slightly messier than normal#Posing's a bit stiff but I'm fine with that#Onto the actual art! Haha#I really didn't think I'd get as much mileage out of Eli as I have but they're really perfect for some aspects#Got a little jittery and the red shines clarified - I talked last time about them relating to hubris - still true!#Eli's a scientist first and foremost and still holds on to a very human thirst for knowledge hehe ♫ To...effect#Well this is data too#I considered having their eyes a pale purple since that's about where I'm hovering currently and then - forgot lol#The red shines can manifest no matter what colour their eyes are!#Including red! It's less likely but it can happen and Things Get Ugly :)#Doing eye flicks and stutters is literally always so fun ugh ✨ It's so simple but it looks so good!! My favourite haha#They'll be fine - I'm fine now so Eli's calm too haha
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guess who just bought several new games on steam >:3
#🌙.rambles#i don't usually buy stuff for myself by my own#TURNS OUT A RELATIVE GAVE ME N APOLLO MONEY SO i used some on several games ehe ><#thought i might as welll get both projectmoon games! n several games from the developer of to the moon (including said game as well)#i bought crisis core reunion w my own money yesterday T_T#yk though. hopefully my dad n my aunt can play sometime. how idk when my ps4's just in my room like this BUT#i don't know much abt their childhood in depth but#one aspect of it that ik of is that they grew up w a lot of video games hehe#thinking abt it n ngl they influenced me a Lot. final fantasy is my fav series n. they started my interest#i'm so sleepy it's just 12 smth but i've been sleepy for hours i said i'll finish my part in the final paper by earlier today aaaa#but i ended up playing ffxiv for most of the day ! been playing just like the old days. i missed it so much#doing roulettes n dailies n leveling classes. doing quests here n then. fixing my inventory bcs it's full.#n afking a bunch but also talking w friends n then helping ppl out in pf. i miss raiding so much#playing earlier with stuff in pf reminded me of two things. that i genuinely am good at the game n that#i REALLY miss raiding. savage n ultimates.. heck even extremes i just really miss playing more difficult content in ffxiv#i miss learning fights w other players. i miss the stress to an extent. n the relief n. the pride in mastering mechanics#the thrill in. hdlfajsdlkf when i'd clutch smth n then the way my heart warms when like#i miss vcing w the old statics i had n. their voices hehe. from europe n oceania. different accents#i miss how. even though i'd be too shy to unmute or even rlly talk a lot. i was a part of them. i belonged.#back in twintania it was.. especially like a second home. n ever since endwalker i'll be honest it hasn't been quite the same but#it's still the same game. i miss when i cld spend more time w my friends then but i'm rlly happy now in ffxiv at least that#slowly i'm having that again. i want to also like. goddamn i rlly love helping others. seeing them improve n reach greater heights#rlly just makes me so happy. genuinely. someday someday we'll do ultimates together! ><#someday far away but surely i know one day. n when that day comes. i won't hesitate anymore.#i ended up rambling i'm so sleepy i'll just play more tmrrw i think. or i dunno. I'M SO SLEEPY WTF..#the year n the break ends so soon i'm gna have to start studying for cets like next week alrdy :<#i'm excited honestly to review stuff for science bcs i'm genuinely really fond of learning. but ugh i love learning but i hate school#i have so much games to play but there's not enough time! i will fix stuff asap. maybe. idk making plans while i'm sleepy is No#i rlly want an animated background for my steam profile but i do not have enough points yet T_T oh if you check it out tho pls#do not judge the games i'll cry pls don't judge me :c anyways. good day tho today was a good day c:
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Same anon as before, I’m happy that you’re accepting yourself! That’s great news. I had a very similar situation where I was very embarrassed about what character my brain chose to project onto, but after working with my therapist and years of reflection I’ve realized it had to be that character because they were the only one I could see myself in, we were both abused in certain ways that made it like looking in a mirror, and being Him meant that I was able to protect myself because he could (character is someone “dangerous” in their world). So I really think it comes down to a reflection of trauma, and there’s nothing to be ashamed about. We coped with what our brains found the most comfort in.
If I can ask, what does your therapist think about it? Only wondering because with my therapist, they are aware we have fictives of this character as well as the system as a whole projects through him but I’m still trying to figure out if it’s part fictives and other part alters with psychotic attachments or if there’s something else at play as well like past lives (the old fictionkin community used to be big into that but I know it’s not so much anymore so I’m a little embarrassed but I am still a spiritual person) alr that’s all, looking forward to your response!
First of all, I'm glad to hear back from you anon!!
My therapist and I figured roughly the same thing happened with me! When I say I use this character as a therapy tool, I don't think it's appreciated enough that it's bc my therapist familiarized himself with the source - my therapist watched (and enjoyed) 148 episodes of anime for my sessions and I cannot stress that enough lmao; we're pretty sure that what happened was that I saw a lot of my emotional trauma play out again in front of me in his character arc, mostly in the way he perceives himself but also with how he struggles with his emotions and general interactions with the world (with my own difficulty with such coming from the climate of the family that abused me). He did serve as a mirror, not just of my own trauma, but also of what I wish I could have done, which was to lash out and genuinely own my anger and frustration and do something. Of course there's a lot more to it, but with just covering the surface, looks like we've had pretty similar experiences!
As for my therapist's thoughts on this, we actually haven't put any clinical labels on it. I personally like labels, they make me feel sure and certain about things in my life, which is why I tried to nail this down with the OSDD/DDNOS (complete with question mark) in my bio, but truth be told I'm not entirely sure I meet the full criteria for either of them, in spite of the genuine experiences I've had with what definitely feels like multiplicity of some sort. Interestingly enough, while I myself am not very spiritual, my therapist did make a mention that this is an experience that I could try looking at through a spiritual lens, especially since it's been coming up a lot more as I'm trying to rework some deeply held thought patterns. There's been a pretty positive outlook on it overall and he encouraged me to interact with it - the episodes tend to come with some specific thoughts and feelings, so we're treating them (and by extension, this character) as a sort of conduit for them, sort of like a messenger bringing attention to them. This is all some pretty specific info for my stuff though lmao, I just wanted to cover the ground as thoroughly as I could 💖
#part of me genuinely does wanna reach out to the fictionkin community just for the value of having potential community experience#but also. maybe I'll just watch them for a bit and think about it lmao#my experiences with my dissociation is like. it feels like there's someone else with me you know? im alone but i can feel someone else#and I'm holding their feelings and thoughts in those moments#if i believed in ghosts hardcore this would 100% make me think im possessed but fortunately i recognize where#all this is coming from as far as functionality and the name attached; funnnily enough i remember a video my roommate#put on and it was talking about psychosis scenes in movies + gauging them for accuracy#and the guy starts talking about DID and I'm like okay i definitely dont meet the criteria for that but I'm half paying attention#and he mentions that one of the things that people have reported is feeling like they're possessed and i just sat there FLOORED by this#bc that was exactly how I'd described the feelings in therapy; 1:1 word for word 😳 again i know for sure i dont have DID#but the same guidelines that make up the definitions and criteria are kinda also running along my dissociative episodes as well#ive already said so much in the tags but i did have a session where i just sat there and was like. i want to love every part of myself#and that includes the episodes; i know they're a protective measure and i dont wanna feel like I'm fighting them anymore#that was months ago; this is by far the most vocal ive been about it#it took almost a year for me to settle into it and be able to talk about it even in therapy but I'm so glad i can do it now#and I'm so glad to be hearing from people who understand how this feels 💖💖💖 thank you so much again!!!#im realizing that i actually have a lot of thoughts on this now that im actually understanding it a lot better#the asks are just giving me some chances to infodump a little hehe 💕#you're welcome in my inbox any time!! thanks again!! 💖💖💖#asks
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✎ all of me
- gojo satoru x reader
you understand that some things in marriage just needs compromise. and he soon understands too, when you're at your most vulnerable and he fails to be by your side when you need him the most
genre: angst, hurt/comfort, established relationship (you're married & have a son!) argument, feral gojo, mentions of injury & blood, fluff
note: if it isn't obvious by now i'm in the mood of angst-hurt/comfort this week HEHE :)) this is longer than the usual love entry, so i hope you'll enjoy it!
a part of gojo's love entries
general masterlist
Bantering with your husband is not uncommon―in fact, it happens on daily basis.
"Satoru― I'm talking to you!"
But having serious arguments with him is another matter entirely.
Your fists tightening at your sides, facing his unamused expression. How insufferable is he? You told him that everyday, but right now, he's truly surpassed previous levels of infuriating behavior.
"And I can hear you, sweetheart," he retorted, casting a glance your way. The term of endearment he used for you sounding almost like a sneer to your ears and you felt offended.
"I don't think you're taking this seriously," you griped, trying to calm your emotions, still balling your hands. "Someone is following our son on his way back from school―how can you be this... flippant?!"
Numerous photograph of your son exiting the school building from different angles had arrived in your mailbox, and if it wasn't a creepy warning from those who placed a target on his back, then you didn't know what it was.
Satoru let out an exasperated grunt. "I'm telling you, I'll pick him up for the rest of the week. No one will lay a hand on him."
You gritted your teeth. "And I'm telling you, they're trying to make you do just that. Even morons know not to mess with you― they're leaving hints, and you're taking the bait!"
Contrary to what you believed, Satoru felt just as worried as you upon knowing that someone might have marked his precious son, who was now six years old and had recently started attending preschool.
But this is where your approaches differ. You are always the cautious one, overanalyzing each detail, while he leans towards being impulsive, often resorting to brute force.
"Who do you think can stand a chance against me?" Satoru challenged with a real sneer this time. "Remember my words, wife, no one is going to hurt me, you or our baby. I'll end them where they stand."
"That's not the point!" you threw your hands in the air, irate. "Satoru, they're going to take advantage of―"
"Look, I don't want to argue with you." Satoru's gaze was hard on you, his tone clipped, and it made you stiffen. "His safety comes first— and you, of all people, should know I'd never let anything happen to him. You need to quit nitpicking and have a little faith in me."
"I know you are more than capable, but you are not―!"
And then he said it, and his words piercing through you like a knife―
"Don't compare me to you," your husband remarked a little too coldly. "I can do things you can't. Just rest your pretty head, I'll take care of the rest."
Nevermind that he blatantly dismissed your skills as a jujutsu sorcerer, nevermind that he totally didn't listen to you at all―he just went and made himself look like some sort unparalleled god, forgetting how much his hubris could actually take him.
And all these thoughts only made you angrier.
"So be it then." You tried desperately to hold yourself from shaking because you'd be damned if you showed it to him. "A word of advice, Satoru: beware of your arrogance."
With those words, you spun around, marching off toward your son's room, because no way in hell was you going to sleep with that obnoxious prick tonight.
But when you caught the sight of your baby scuttling away from the gap in the door, a fragment of your heart crumbled. Oh. He has seen it all.
In Gojo Satoru's mind, he is made of two things: a powerful jujutsu sorcerer and a family man.
With his immense strength, comes a certain responsibility. And with that responsibility, certain habits have formed. If you just took a few seconds to breathe and looked back throughout the past decade he'd spent with you, you'd know that in fact―
It was also his way to shield you. Satoru stands by the principle that you and his little boy must be protected at all cost, and he most certainly would pull all stops to do just that.
But frankly, he couldn't deny that he felt insulted by how defiant you were. Did you really think he would let anyone ever touch your―his―son? He wouldn't, they'd meet his wrath first and you should've known that.
Still, something akin to guilt nudged at his conscience as he lay alone in your shared bed that night. It felt strange not having you cuddling him. He felt empty.
. . .
None of your shampoo-scented pillow, none of your nightdresses, all of it replaced by a single photo hanging in the wall and the urn of ashes—
Abruptly, he jerked his eyes open, shaken from the most dreadful nightmare he had experienced—
Of you no longer by his side.
“Mama.” Your little boy looked up to you with his doe-blue eyes in the next day, his hand gripping yours. “I’ll be fine.”
You were accompanying him to the preschool. While Satoru had requested Ichiji to drive him, you insisted on tagging along to keep a watchful eye as well. You'd leave your husband to pick him up later just as he wanted.
“Huh?” you turned to him, tilting your head.
“I'll stick by Uncle Ichiji's side the entire time,” he replied in a murmur. “And papa will be picking me up too later. If there are bad guys, they'll get him first.”
You bit your lip, feeling a wave of guilt wash over you. Your boy witnessed your outburst last night and hadn't inquired about it until now, and even then, he was trying to reassure you.
“So… don’t fight.” His round, cerulean eyes then darted towards you, blinking hesitantly, causing you to catch your breath.
He looks so much like Satoru. At six years old, he was the spitting image of him, except his personality—he took after you in that area. It was as if your son was a softer, more innocent version of him. And your heart twisted, remembering your argument last night.
Don't compare me to you.
With a sigh, you bent down to be eye-level with him and managed a smile, holding both of his little hands. “I’m sorry… it was just misunderstanding last night, okay? Don’t worry.”
“…really?”
“Really. Mama and papa were just tired,” you tried to reason, a thin smile on your face. "It's going to be okay, just like you said, yeah? Papa will beat the bad guys out there."
“Will he pull through...? If they bring a knife, and he's just there laughing, they can cut him.”
A giggle escaped your lips at your baby's innocent wonderings, easing the ache in your heart as you recalled how Satoru humored him in so many ways.
You gently poked your son in the cheek. "Nah, do you remember what he always goes on about?"
He puffed up his cheeks in response, his expression turning sour as if combing through memories of hundreds of shenanigans Satoru had instigated to recall his words. You let out a hearty chuckle, finding him so adorable.
"He's strong, he's going to win. He always does."
"Oh. Mmm." Your son scrunched up his nose cutely, before looking away and squeezing your hand. A sincerer smile bloomed in your lips, heart melting at the sight of your growing munchkin.
You will protect him. And maybe you could patch things up with Satoru later that night. Maybe yesterday you were just too paranoid.
That was the plan... at least until your son suddenly screamed—someone wrenching him from your grasp. Without a second thought, you reacted, flipping the attacker away from you and him.
. . . and that was the beginning of how everything started to unravel so terribly that day.
"Gojo-san...! There's been an incident!"
He got that call right after he finished some things with Yaga. Satoru teleported to the preschool right away, only to be greeted by a scene of utter chaos.
Several teachers stood outside the building, and police officers were present at the scene. It was all a blur of cursed energy until his eyes caught sight of—
His little boy, red-faced and obviously in fear, was clinging to Ichiji, who was frantically making calls. Some teachers gathered around him were seemingly trying to coax him to speak.
He didn't waste a second to dash towards him, tearing through the crowd.
"Are you okay? Hey, buddy, what happened?" Satoru pulled him away from Ichiji and turned him over, crouching to his level to check for any signs of injury or harm.
And upon seeing him actually here, his son's eyes immediately welled up with tears, and Satoru felt a chill run through his veins as he broke into sobs, which quickly turned into heart-wrenching wails.
"Mama—! F-find mama—!" the little boy choked out through his tears, clutching onto his shirt tightly and crumbling in his embrace, thoroughly inconsolable.
Satoru's sharp gaze quickly swept over the scene, seeking any clues, while he tightened his hold over him. It was then he noticed traces of your cursed energy mingled with blood.
They hurt you.
"Hey, kiddo—listen to me, it's going to be alright, yeah?" Satoru said, gently pulling away to wipe away his tears, holding the boy's face tenderly in his hands. "Go with Ichiji for now, okay? I'm going to bring mama back, I promise."
He didn't need to be told twice. Your son is always obedient when it matters the most. He gave him a small nod, still shaking with tears.
"Don't worry," he flashed a reassuring smile and ruffled his hair. "I'm the strongest, remember? I'll get her back," he vowed once again. "She'll be fine. Wait for me until then, yeah?"
Ichiji was ready to leave as he had called for those in headquarters as backup in case anything were to happen again. Trusting him to keep his son safe, Satoru took off as soon as he could no longer see the sight of his son's tear-streaked face trying to watch him as the car pulled away.
"I won't repeat myself— where is my wife?"
Satoru wasn't playing this time. He skipped past taunts and just plain threats. These little fries, he thought.
The man he held by the throat was in a lot of distress. "Hyaaa! It's him! Please, please, let me go! I'm acting under orders!"
He then flung him across the wall— might have added more cursed energy than necessary.
At the moment, his entire focus was on trying to locate you. He couldn't let his mind wander to anything else; in fact, he didn't permit himself to.
It didn't take him long to piece together the general location of where you were through the residual of your cursed energy. They stationed several hooligans in this abandoned warehouse to stall him, but he got rid of them quickly and he could sense that you were close by.
"It's Gojo Satoru!"
"Run! Ruuuun!"
What a pain. They picked the wrong person to mess with, and Satoru's lips curled into a manic grin as he opened his palm, pulling them in—
"Cursed Technique Lapse: Blue."
Chaos erupted as the building collapsed around him. He hoped you would realize he was here and manage to avoid getting caught in the wreckage. He was sure you'd know though.
And true to his thoughts, soon he found you— blasting your attacker away with a powerful kick.
Satoru thought that you were a sight to behold, really. And he was about to call out to you when he felt it.
It happened almost in an instant. The way his heart dropped to his stomach, and how his body reacted, barely whispering the incantation for Red as he shot it at something lurking behind you—
At that moment, the only thing you were aware of was the foul stench of a curse. Time seemed to stop before the overwhelming force of Red expelled it away from you.
But before then, you experienced a searing, white-hot pain that scorched through your flesh and pierced your abdomen—
"Y/N―fuck―!" The voice that came from Satoru's throat was raw and laden with panic.
He pulled you against him protectively as you collapsed, blinded by pain. He immediately felt warmth spreading across his lower body—your blood was rapidly drenching his shirt, and he felt a shiver down his spine.
You held onto him tightly while suppressing your scream, feeling every bit of your strength drain away along with the dark crimson blood that poured out of you.
"―toru―" you managed to croak amidst the scalding pain, curling and whimpering in his hold.
"Hey― sweetheart, please―" his voice rang in your ears, as he pressed down on your wound. His hands were shaking, and you clawed at him and groaned in agony. "I-I'm taking you back now― You're going to be alright, yeah?"
The wound was beyond anything you had experienced before, causing you to cry out and gasp for air. It was almost as if something fried your insides. It was hard to stay conscious.
"I've got you now. You're going to be okay." His voice was coarse, as he hurriedly carried you out. And he tried not to let the full-blown panic take over him when your body went limp in his arms, your breaths slowing, head lolling in his chest.
"You're going to be alright! You hear me, sweetheart? You're going to make it. Our baby― he's waiting for you. I promise you, you're going to be fine―"
Perhaps he was trying to tell that to himself, because despite the excruciating pain, a wave of reassurance washed over you.
You were in the arms of the strongest sorcerer alive, what more could you possibly afraid of?
A special grade curse. They had actually unleashed a potent curse and likely aimed at him as their final card—until it veered off course and struck you, leaving a searing gash across your abdomen.
Satoru felt numb as he sat in the waiting room in his bloodied uniform. You got hurt so terribly right in front of his eyes, and all he could feel was this profound void that seemed to bore through him and pierced his soul.
He was supposed to protect you. He said it to your face that nothing and no one would touch your son, and it was in his wedding vows that he'd protect you with his life too.
And yet what happened?
If only he was faster. If only he was able to pull you to him and protect you with his infinity—none of this shit would have happened.
Seeing your face twisted in agony and smeared with blood made him feel sick to his stomach. Inside that OR, you hovered on the brink of life and death, and he was here, unable to do anything.
Satoru rested his head against the wall, feeling a sharp pain surge through his chest. He remembered waking up to your face every morning, the way your touches felt, and how you had brightened his world for the past decade. If he lost you now... he wouldn't survive it. He would wreck anything, everything—
"Papa!" and came his voice of reason. Satoru immediately discarded his bloodstained jacket by instinct, throwing it away before his boy could see it, with Ichiji and Megumi closely trailing behind.
His son crashed himself into him and threw his little arms around his torso, crying—and in that very second, the thump of his heart sounded louder in his ears. Somehow it felt like a knife that twisted his insides.
"Hey, kiddo." Satoru repositioned him so that he would sit on his lap and hugged him, patting him in the back. "There, there... it's alright, yeah? Mama is inside, she'll get better soon."
Your little boy pulled away and wiped his eyes, and Satoru chuckled as he helped him blow his nose. His child was incredibly adorable, and his actions mirrored yours to such an extent that it made Satoru's heart soften.
"Mama g-got hurt trying to... tell me to g-go..." the boy suddenly said amidst his quieter sniffles. "And... she s-said... papa— i-is strong and g-going to win..."
You believe in him. Ignoring the ache in his chest, only able to reply him with a "Yeah..."
Not long after, Shoko emerged from the operating room and informed him that the surgery had been successful, though you would likely need to have a one-week stay in the hospital for observation. He intended to move you to the VIP suite and stay the night there, but then he remembered his son, who was holding his hand.
Satoru crouched down and patted him in the head, fixing him a smile. "See? Mama is okay, but she needs to sleep here to get even better. Now you go home first with big brother Megumi, yeah?"
Your son adored Megumi and often begged you to let him stay over at his place, but this time he looked hesitant, fiddling with his little fingers. "Really? Mama will be home... soon?"
"Mm-hmm, the more she sleeps here, the faster she'll go back home, alright?"
And with that, his baby nodded and Satoru turned to Megumi with a nod. "Thank you for this, Megumi."
The boy whose life he had once saved on some sort of a whim, now grown up and shared the same concern he had for you, Fushiguro Megumi had never before witnessed his benefactor expressing such sincere gratitude for anything before.
When you came to, your body felt as heavy as lead.
The discomfort in your abdomen made you flinch, and you almost let out a groan until you turned to your side and saw him.
Satoru was asleep while sitting in the sofa next to your bed, dark circles evident under his eyes. It might have been your imagination, but his cheeks appeared to be slightly red too.
You tried to recall what had happened to you when it came back—you urging your son to run away as you let yourself being taken away, almost escaping from that warehouse, the flash of excruciating pain, and Satoru's stricken voice.
So he must've been here since last night. Any remnants of your disagreement seemed to have vanished, seeing him there with you, barely covering himself with the blanket, with a frown still marking his forehead even in his sleep.
You wanted to reach out to him until the movement sent a sharp jab to your stomach and you cried out a bit.
In that split second, Satoru's eyes jerked open, and realizing you were awake, his gaze locked onto yours. "Y/N—" But your strained whimper and expression told him everything. "Does it hurt? I-I'll get Shoko, wait—"
And then he hit the call button. Throughout it all, he kept a firm grip on your hand for reassurance. A few minutes later, Shoko arrived and examined your wound, subsequently administering painkillers to alleviate your discomfort.
"It's going to leave a scar," she explained grimly, showing the mangled skin where the curse had made its mark on you, and seeing that, Satoru clenched his fists.
Shoko sighed, empathizing with her friend's frustration. "It's going to fade with time, don't worry. You did well, Gojo. You brought her here quickly. Had you been even slightly later, there could have been an irreversible damage to her organs."
But your husband remained quiet, unable to bring himself to look at you. And after she left, you tried to finally voice your question to him.
"O-our—"
"He's fine," Satoru immediately answered, squeezing your hand. "Our boy is fine. I'll tell Megumi to visit later—he's with him."
A sigh of relief came out of you. "Thank... goodness."
But his expression seemed to fall even further after hearing your response. Satoru settled himself on the seat next to you and lowered the rail on your bed, allowing you to be even closer to each other.
"Do you not feel any pain anymore?" he asked then, gently tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. He looked so sad, a stark contrast of how he usually was, and it bugged you.
"No... I feel fine now."
"Then, can I hug you?"
Of course you nodded without a second thought, and carefully, he wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you close and resting his face on the crook of your neck.
You knew what it was. Satoru was still visibly shaken by what had happened to you, and he wasn't great at expressing himself, so he tried to find consolation through this physical closeness instead.
"I'm okay..." you patted his back, trying to convince him. "I'm alright now, yeah?" But to your surprise, suddenly his whole body started to shake. "Satoru...?"
“…’m sorry.” His voice was barely above a whisper as he nuzzled you. “I shouldn't... have let you get this hurt...”
It always amazes you how Satoru always gets this distressed whenever you sustain any injury. You had seen him cry precisely two times now—once after you gave birth to your son and experienced severe bleeding, and now.
"It's not your fault..." you whispered in response. "You... have protected me well."
He held you tighter, his tone faltering. "I didn't."
"You have..." you stroked his hair, trying to convince him. "I'm still here, aren't I?"
Hearing you say that made Satoru's chest ache. The thought of something like this happening to you was unimaginable, and now that it had, he couldn't come to terms with seeing you hurt right in front of him.
"Don't—" he choked on his voice, his breath trembled against your neck. "Don't ever put yourself in danger again. If something happened to you, I wouldn't be able to live with myself..."
You couldn't make that promise. Despite the pleading in his voice, you knew deep down that your son's life—and his—meant more, and given the chance, you would obviously save theirs for yours.
“Satoru... I love you, you know that, right?”
So you simply embraced him close, hoping that in this life, you would live long enough that he would never have to see you like this again.
Epilogue
"Papa, how do I become stronger?"
Satoru blinked when his son asked him that so innocently and curiously, taken aback as he led him to your private room later that afternoon. "Oh? What brought this on?"
His first and only son, a perfect miniature of himself, pursed his lips. "I don't want Mama to get hurt again..."
Satoru's heart warmed at his baby’s sincere words, and despite himself, he chuckled.
"What's funny?" his son leveled a glare at him. "I'm being serious."
"Well, aren't you such a good boy? Don't worry, kiddo, I'll teach you my ways~"
"What ways?"
"Well, no need to rush, pumpkin. First of all, you will have to harness your skills and then you have to be more like me—"
"Do I have to be like you…? Is there no other way?"
"—? What's wrong with being more like me?"
"Everything...?"
#𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#satoru gojo x reader#satoru x reader#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jjk angst#gojo satoru#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk gojo#gojo fluff#gojo angst#jjk x you#jjk imagines#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#jujutsu kaisen x you#gojo satoru imagines#gojo x you#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru fluff#satoru gojo fluff#jjk x reader fluff
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STREAM DOODLES BABEEYYYYYYYY
the context for all of these is somewhat lost due to them being based on jokes between me and everybody in chat while I was streaming, so I've added in some explanations in the image IDs. I owe a lot of these ideas to everybody who came and hung out with me during the streams, so if you ever have an idea you'd like to chat with me about or see me draw feel free to come hang out at the next one! I'm always happy to take suggestions ^^
#OOH BTW IM THINKIN IM GONNA DO ONE TONIGHT#details in a separate post soon hehe#first time posting any genderswapped art of them lol#tbh there isn't much of a point in it for me bc I just draw them the same way xD like as much fun as it is to change the outfits#I just figure Sam is butch either way lmao. like if I had any gender I'd probably still wear the same ties and vests I do now#and as for max like. he nakey. maxine can have a little chest fluff but that's as far as I'm willing to go lmaooo#that said!! everybody else keep doin your own thing it's all about havin fun ^^#and I love that there are so many varied interpretations of the wives teehee#sam and max#sam and max freelance police#freelance husbands#my art#tw genderbend#tw gb#art stream#streams#sammunmak
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Third time's the charm
Pairing: virgin!Spencer Reid x fem!reader Summary: During one of your movie nights with Spencer, you decide to, once again, take the lead. Or, you got cockblocked so often that you almost thought it wouldn't happen. WC: 3.1k Warnings: smut (nipple play and dry humping); reader thinks spencer might be asexual but he's just a shy puppy; they are desperate for each other; "ruined" movie night; virgin!Spencer my beloved. (I guess that's it. If I forgot something, please let me know!) A/N: Aaaand here it is! I didn't think I'd write smut so soon, hehe. I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it - it's actually a sequel to Dearest friend, but can be read as a stand-alone. Feedbacks are highly welcomed and appreciated. <3 Masterlist
"It’s nice we finally have some time for each other," you hummed in agreement. "Thanks for coming over," Spencer said.
"You don't have to thank me," you said, sitting down on his couch after placing the drinks you chose from his fridge on the coffee table. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else," you confessed. It got him blushing.
Spencer started one of your movies. It was your choice: you usually took turns picking out a movie to watch together whenever you had the chance, since neither of you were keen of going out that often and you didn't have much time outside of work. It was a fun opportunity to know more of each other through your personal taste, since he often chose foreign films about humanities and you, well, you made him watch Easy A, which got him talking about Nathaniel Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter.
After the movies, you would talk to each other about it, maybe mentioning a personal experience that you remembered thanks to a particular scene or a character's arch. Maybe you would kiss.
Which was a problem. Well, not a problem, but, you see, you didn't have much time together other than going to each other's houses and out on a few dates, which were your favorite: Spencer often found the most beautiful, cozy places to take you, like coffee shops, museums, bookshops and libraries, followed by a nice dinner at a local restaurant. It was during one of those dates that something gave him the nerve to touch your hand. Holding hands quickly escalated to having his hands around you at all times possible, and it got to the point where you nearly had to peel off of him when he got too comfortable and you sadly had to leave to do something. These moments of physical touch were making you go insane, thinking about making a bolder move on him, but you thought that maybe he wasn't ready. Plus the fact that you seemed to be interrupted whenever things got too heated.
If you had a nickel for everytime you and Spencer had to stop right before you got intimate (in any way, really), you'd have two nickels, which isn't much, but it's weird that it happened twice. It was like the universe (more like Hotch and the gore that surrounded the team) were set on a mission for you to never have sex again. Besides that, more extreme thoughts plagued your mind and told you that maybe he wasn’t attracted to you like that. It often made you go home feeling a little bit insecure.
You knew that it was better to assume, but you were only human. After some pep talk with yourself on the way to his place, you convinced yourself that you would have to have this conversation with him, sooner or later. You thought so hard about this that you even came up with the possibility that he was asexual — you were fine with it if he was, obviously, because being with him made you feel whole. Still, you wanted, you needed to get this off your chest before you exploded with assumptions and unrequited feelings. Unrequited desire.
You decided to try to be subtle. Scratching the back of his head with your nails lovingly, you both watched the movie. "What are you doing?" He asked, looking at you. You could see the goosebumps on his arm, that must have been the trigger for the question coming out of his lips. You gave him a soft smile.
"It's called affection, pretty boy," you kissed the tip of his nose. "And I don't intend on stopping anytime soon."
You kissed his left cheek when he turned to look at the TV screen.
Then, you turned his head gently to kiss the right one. He glanced between your eyes and your lips, so of fucking course you were about to kiss him, but you decided to tease him a little and pecked the tip of his nose and gently kissed his forehead instead. He breathed out a laugh. Ticklish. It made you wonder where else he would be sensitive.
Stop, you slut of a brain.
When you were about to kiss his lips, you withdrew your face from his, smooching his cheek instead. He sighed, oblivious to your real intentions, impatient and utterly, stupidly in love with you.
Oops. There goes your heart. Out the window. Taking your judgment with it.
"Spence?"
"Yes?"
"Can I do something?"
"Yes," he answered. "You know can do anything, baby."
"This is a very dangerous thing to say to a girl who has the feelings I have for you," you said, grinning. His expression morphed into one that almost looked like sheer panick.
You slowly moved to straddle his lap, giving him plenty of time to stop you if he wanted to, his legs trapped between yours. You sat yourself on the top of his thighs. He watched every movement feeling like the world stopped and there were the both of you, moving in slow motion, movie long forgotten behind you. His breath hitched when he came to his senses and noticed the position you were in, now that you've done what you had. "Is this okay? It's more comfortable than kissing you like… well, that," you laughed softly.
"Yes. I-It's perfect," he breathed out, hands finding your waist.
You lips finally met his in a kiss that had both of you sighing. You found out that Spencer was a really good kisser — and you were proud to be the one with whom he practiced kissing to perfection —, your lips easily falling into a passionate rhythm. Gasping for air, you pecked him on those perfect lips that were red and puffy from all the assaulting you were doing, but he quickly pulled you in for another, this time, sloppier than ever, encouraged by your own boldness. He was french kissing you. Fairly used to it, but not with the intensity of it, you groaned in welcomed surprise, hands finding the nape of his neck and getting a grip on them, not so gently as you normally did. You pulled his hair down, breaking the kiss, lips tingling and lungs screaming for air. He smirked, feeling smug at the state he left you in.
You rose slightly from his lap, still holding his head and looking straight into his eyes. By holding yourself slightly above him, the pendant of your necklace grazed his chin, like he had imagined many times after watching you fiddle with it. God, it was finally coming true, having you in his arms and intending to let you do whatever you wanted to him and him only, the way that it should be ever since the day you met. You nearly made him go insane, pulling you closer to his body than you ever were, acting like a desperate madman. You smiled down at him and kissed him again, more feverishly than before, trying to tell him through that kiss that you were his. Biting his lower lip and earning a fucking moan, you sat yourself down on him again. You felt his bulge against your clothed core and the light contact made you feel lightheaded.
You were so caught up on him that it almost made you forget you needed to talk to him first. Unfortunately, as you tried to catch your breath and to find the right words to speak, Spencer felt his insecurities creeping up on him. Despite knowing it would be best to talk to you, he felt like voicing it out loud would push you away from him — which he didn't want. He was very comfortable with the indecent small distance between your bodies.
He was fidgety. You knew you needed to address this because your boyfriend wasn't the best at voicing his needs — you remember and giggled internally at how you had been the one to knock on Spencer's door asking him to put an end to your suffering by telling him how you felt. Heh. Kudos to you.
"I wanted to talk about this with you," you murmured, now feeling his kisses peppering the skin of your neck. You knew how much he was hiding from you because he wouldn't stop moving and it was very distracting, but if you didn't speak, it would be the end of you. "I'd ask if you were okay with me and you like this, about taking further steps, shit." You moaned when he fucking bit you and kissed you right after.
He pulled away from you, hands flying up to the back of your head. Foreheads touching, eyes locked in yours. "I want it. I want you, I mean. Been wanting you for some time now—a very long time, yes." He strongly shut his eyes closed, most likely working up the courage to say something. "But I don't want to... disappoint you," he finished, sounding insecure.
Not on your watch.
"Me too, Spence. God, I want you so bad," you answered, unable to look away from him, who now looked down, paying close attention to the rising and falling of your chest. "Hey, look at me, please," you pleaded. His eyes met yours. Oh, those maddening eyes... "Believe me when I tell you, baby, I want you. And if you don't want to do anything, you don't have to. I won't push you, of course. I just wanted to have a conversation with you before, because setting boundaries is important and consent is hot—" he laughed quietly. Making jokes was your go-to way of making situations lighter and he was glad for it then. You smiled when you noticed the sound he made. "And I'm also positively certain that you wouldn't like to have our first time on your couch."
"My first time," he revealed. softly. Eyes not meeting yours.
Oh.
You didn’t falter. "It doesn't change much, baby. I still stand for what I just told you," you assured him, "I want you to enjoy yourself, Spence."
Looking back into your eyes, he declared, "And I want you."
"You can have me," you answered, "You already have."
"You'd need to guide me. You know, hands-on activity. Because I’ve never done it before…" he trailed off.
"Lucky for you, I'm great at teaching."
His grip finds your waist, lips anxiously waiting for yours — and when they touched to mold perfectly in another breathtaking kiss, he felt complete. Like nothing bad could ever happen in the world just because you were in it. His past, his insecurities, the awful things you both saw on the field, nothing mattered. Looking at you, touching you, was a nearly an out of body experience. The things you got him thinking by just kissing him. And he thought his insecurities would get the best of him. Jokes on them, you exist.
You look at him through hooded eyes. "I've never felt like this before. I feel... tingly," he confessed, lovely smile on his face, eyes blinking.
"You're feeling good, handsome," you answered, glancing at his dazed eyes.
A beat of silence. Swallowing second thoughts. "Can you make it better?"
"Is that a request or a challenge?" You asked, grinning.
"A request." He answered shyly, hiding his face on your neck, peppering kisses on your skin. You were going to explode.
"Oh, don't talk to me like that," you shivered, feeling absolutely lost, "I might spoil you and give you everything you want," you sighed.
"Let me have it, then," he answered, voice muffled by your skin.
"I'm all yours, Spencer."
He had the audacity of blushing as his fingers played with the hem of your shirt. You smiled at him. In this state, if he asked for you to run naked around town, you probably would. It was dangerous, to say the least. Softly, yet desperate, the words left his lips. "Can I take this off?" He sucked in a breath. "Please?"
"Yes, pretty boy, you can," you answered. "You can have anything. I thought I already said that."
"Yes—You did. You did," he breathed out between needy kisses across your skin, getting rid of your shirt in no time.
At first, he was mesmerized by the sight in front of him. He hadn't seen many naked (or semi-naked) women in front of him, but you were something out of this world. The bra you were wearing matched your skin tone and pushed your breasts together and there was the fucking necklace, almost mocking him by being constantly so close, too close to the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. The view was almost overwhelming by itself. You looked at him, but he couldn't possibly come up with the words that would describe you in that moment. Words had failed him, nothing else in his mind but you. The tool he used to communicate, to access the world and how it shaped reality, to comprehend the mind of another person, to get to know others... He had nothing left. Except from the pulsing of his boner against your clothed pussy, that is.
Just like that, IQ of 187 slashed to 60, Emily Prentiss said, once. Funnily enough, when you passed by wearing a sundress.
Unable to talk but, oh, so able to use his hands, they traveled up to your breasts with a featherlight touch, which didn't stop him from feeling your heartbeat. He let his hands trail over the soft and sheer fabric of the bra you were wearing. Finding your nipples, his touch got more intense. He licked his lips. His actions made you shudder and sent a spark of excitement to your sex. "Pretty," he said. "So, so pretty, my girl."
"Do you like it?" You asked, breathless from a little touching. Pathetic. "I got these thinking of you. Wanna look pretty for you, Spence."
"You are," he said, looking into your eyes, his own foggy, hands reaching to touch your neck. "You're pretty all the time, it's so unfair to me," he murmured. "I really like them on you, but… can I take ‘em off?"
"Yes. You can do anything, Spence."
Spencer wanted to burn the sight of you, in that slightly disheveled state, in the back of his mind so he could remember it forever — not that he would have a hard time trying to remember anything. Nevertheless, he did everything so slowly, almost as if trying to tattoo on the tip of his fingers the softness and temperature of your skin. He inhaled deeply, consumed by your floral-scented perfume and lifted his hands to unclasp your bra. His fingers curiously, but unhurriedly, lowered each of the straps. Like opening a gift that had been so carefully wrapped he didn't want to ruin.
But did he wanted to be ruined by you.
The sight of your bare chest was marvelous, to say the least, and he timidly grazed his fingertips against the exposed area, eliciting goosebumps and a soft whine. His mouth watered, thoughts simply reduced to the need of having you in his mouth. The striped pattern on the soft skin of your breasts around your nipples were faint, barely there, unless if you took a close look at it. It goes without saying that he was blatantly gazing at your bosom at this point.
Pupils dilated, he looked up at you, hungrily, drawing his face closer to you, curls tickling the skin of your collarbone. He inhaled your scent, mind blanking. Tortuously dragging his lips on your skin (and unintentionally smearing some of his saliva on you, he was drooling, after all) as a silent request, the necklace brushing his forehead slightly. The grind of your hips against his answered his plead to taste you.
"Oh—you're so, so good to me, princess," you moaned when he finally wrapped his lips against the nub, playing with the other.
You felt almost overwhelmed with the attention you were getting and the reaction you were having to said attention. Your underwear was sticking almost uncomfortably against your core and you felt yourself aching for some relief, aching for him. So, as Spencer worked his hot tongue on your tits, licking, softly biting, sucking, making a mess on and of you, you busied yourself by chasing the relief you both desperately wanted. The solace it provided you both with was exhilarating and made you feel dazed.
Steadily rocking yourself against him, you earned a few grunts. "You're making a mess of me, pretty boy," you murmured as he switched his attention to the other boob.
"Give it t'me—I want it, I deserve it," he breathed out, body aching with lust, cock pulsing against your covered clit. His words only fueled the fire inside you, the coil in your lower stomach threatening to snap at anytime now.
"Yeah, you do, my boy," you breathed out, pulling the hair on the nape of his neck, nearly tasting your orgasm, "gonna look so pretty when you come for me, won't you, baby?" Both hands gripping your hips, mouth never leaving your skin. You sure would be bruised by tomorrow, but this, this was definitely worth it.
"Yes—Yes, I will," He whined. He fucking whined.
"Tell, me—ah—where do you want to cum, baby?"
"Shit—" until then, you were sure that was a word you'd never hear him saying, let alone that freely. "Gonna—Shitshitshit," moaning out your name.
That's when it hit you that he had cummed his pants. It was such a fat load that it had seeped through both his underwear and his slacks — which prompted you to reach your own high with a moan of his name directly into his ear.
Both of you feeling dizzy, you slump against him, feeling his arms wrapping your frame as you rested your head on his shoulder. You both took deep breaths, the only sound in the room. Well, besides the movie you both totally ignored.
"I can't get up right now... My legs feel wobbly," you chuckled. "Are you okay, Spence?" You asked, looking at him when you didn't get an answer.
"Yeah, 'm fine," he answered, "I mean, I'll be fine as soon as I recover from you."
You laughed sincerely, "From me? What have I done to you?"
"You gave me what I wanted, you spoiled me, you broke me," he said, a silly smile adorning his pretty face. You pushed him playfully. "I can't even explain what I'm feeling right now. My brain has stopped working ever since you straddled me. Are you trying to kill me?"
"No, babe."
"Wrong answer. You're so gonna keep doing that to me, so you'll definitely be trying to killing me from now on." He pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid smut#criminal minds fanfiction#cm fanfic#spencer reid x you
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*writing down taglist* Dodadoo, that's a lot.
Hissy Kitty
Part 1
Prologue
Alastor X Reader
Warning!⚠
⚠ cussing, bold italics = sound affects, italics = thoughts, catnip, cat demon reader doing cat things, hehe ⚠
Husk stared with a scowl behind the bar at the red deer demon standing a little too close to you.
Its been a week and that piece of shit would not stop touching you. Placing a hand on your shoulder, grabbing your hand, and even patting you on the head. The last part he's seen the asshole do more often after noticing you purr at the action.
"You've done a wonderful job! I know Niffty appreciates the extra help.", the Radio Demon grinned.
"Are we going to do anything about the ripped up wallpaper?", you asked, looking at one of the lobby walls with peeling wallpaper.
"Don't worry about those. I'll take care of them soon.", the red demon waved it off and pat your head.
Purrrrprrrrrr
"Hands off you slimy fuck!", he threw a bottle at the deer.
Alastor easily dodged and made a tsk noise of disappointment.
"Honestly Husker, you must stop throwing bottles."
You just crossed your arms and sighed. "I'll take my break now."
Husk brought out a cup and a bottle onto the counter, opening it up and waiting for you to notice what drink it was. Not a second later you gravitated towards the bar with dilated pupils.
"Is that..", you mumbled, staring straight at the bottle.
"That's right."
The cat demon flipped off the deer, who was already walking up to the both of you.
"And what is this beverage?", he asked, tapping his fingers on the bar counter.
"Its my favorite.", you whispered, still staring at the bottle. "Husk, hurry up and pour the damn drink."
Your brother chuckled and poured the liquid into the cup, watching in amusement as you snatched it once he lifted the bottle back up.
"Enjoy you gremlin.", he said while putting away the bottle.
The cup was empty a second later.
Alastor was curious.
What is that? Why did the drink have their full attention like that? What a funny reaction.
"Can I have another?", you asked.
"No.", Husk said without a beat, cleaning the cup you used.
"Awwwwwwww!", you whined and rested your head on the counter. "Pleeeeeeeeaaase?"
"No."
Alastor felt his eye twitch at your pouting face.
"I don't see a problem with having another drink.", the deer commented.
You perked up immediately and looked over to the red dressed demon, ears pointing towards him and Husk's ears going back.
"I'm saying no for a reason.", Husk warned.
The Radio Demon rolled his eyes and had his shadow retrieve the bottle.
"I'll take care of whatever problems they cause.", he laughed and swiped the cup from the cat, pouring another drink. "Sound fair?"
"I'm gonna need that in writing."
In writing? He thought placing the filled cup on the counter. Why would that be necessary?
"Surely nothing bad could happen.", he laughed the bartender's concern off and looked towards the cup, only to find it empty.
Alastor looked towards where you were standing and also found that spot empty.
"Better start running deer boy.", Husk said taking the cup. "They have a knack for causing all kind of hell."
Before the Radio Demon could ask what the cat meant, there was a shout from the kitchen.
"WHO ATE ALL OF MA POTATO SALAD!?"
.
Alastor quickly wrote up a small deal, promising to take care of any problem you might cause while under the influence of the strange beverage.
There's nothing too serious. He thought as he went walking around the hotel to find you. Just minor little things like eating Angel's potato salad and scratching up some couches.
He walked into a common room.
Nothing too bad.
CRASH
Both of you made eye contact after you pushed a cup off of the table you were perched on.
"Dear, I'd advise you not to make anymore mess. I'll have to clean it up later."
Ignoring him, you slowly pushed another glass.
"No.", he said in a warning tone.
You stopped and stared at him for a moment before continuing.
"Oh for the love of-", he sighed as the other glass broke. "Fine. Let's do something about your current state.", he walked over to you.
It didn't even take a second for you to shift into a full on cat and dart out of the room.
Now I see what Husker meant.
"This is going to take a while."
Husk watched with a smug grin and took a sip from his bottle.
"No! Get down from there!", the Radio Demon ran over to the middle of the lobby.
You were on the chandelier.
"Oh yeah, they like tall places.", Husk pointed out.
"What in the devil was in that drink?", Alastor said, trying to use his tendrils to get you down.
All you did was swat and paw at the dark things. Moving out of the way and scratching.
"It's catnip tea."
There was a record scratch.
Alastor felt his eye twitch at how obvious it was.
"Figures."
The cat demon felt a little better that he got you to be a problem for the deer. Maybe after this the smiling fuck would leave you alone. Then he'd finally get some peace.
"Husk? What the fuck is going on?", Vaggie walked over, gesturing to what was happening in the lobby.
"Nothing much, just my sibling giving the deer a hard time.", he responded.
There was a crash.
The chandelier having fallen and you running off again.
"Damn!", the red demon snapped his fingers, bringing up some creatures to clean up the mess before going after you.
"Can I watch?"
"Be my guest."
The two watched as the deer demon chased you around the hotel. Trying and failing at getting a good hold on you. After a few hours, Husk and Vaggie left, having been satisfied with all the random shit you did to keep the smiling demon occupied.
Alastor, having run around the hotel all day was tired and had his shadows chase you instead.
Walking over to the couch with the least amount of scratches, he sat down with a tired sigh and leaned back into the cushions.
"Never again.", he told himself.
There were growls and hissing coming from the other side of the lobby, no doubt you scratching the shadows that tried to grab you.
"Do be gentle, there can't be any fur out of place.", Alastor told the shadows as he rubbed the side of his head.
I'll have to go over our original deal later. He thought about the first contract he had Husker sign.
It got quiet for a moment and he saw that you had torn apart his shadows.
"How did you do that?", he asked as you trotted over and jumped up on the couch.
Even now you were still a little cat, fully embracing your cat side.
"You are a menace, you know that?", he said to you, watching as you 'made biscuits' on one of the pillows.
I didn't know you could cause such chaos. Though you did end up in Hell so that should have said something. He thought and leaned his head back, closing his eyes from being tired and up all day.
Then he felt a weight on his lap.
Snapping his eyes open and looking down, he found you resting like a loaf of bread.
"All I had to do was sit down..", he said annoyed before just giving up. "Alright, alright. You have the honor of besting the Radio Demon."
You were comfortable, eyes closed and adjusting just a bit before staying put.
Such a calm thing when they aren't running about. He thought and started to pet your head, which had you purring immediately.
"You know, I never liked dogs. And with you I can see myself being a cat person."
His hand was yanked back by the wrist.
"You better get your fucking hands off of them!", Husk yelled. "They aren't your fucking pet. This is your last warning."
You had run off and hid from the barking cat.
"They had just settled down.", Alastor said and turned to look at your brother, pissed. "₩h¥ wθμ|d y¤U rμ¡n +h@t?"
"Oh calm your ass down.", Husk took out a bell and dropped it, letting it roll on the floor.
You pounced on it and started messing with the ringing ball.
"You think I don't know how they act? I spent years taking care of them before officially becoming an overlord."
"This would have been useful information earlier.", the deer snatched his hand back.
The cat demon rolled his eyes and went to pick you up along with the ball before turning back to look at his boss.
"I just wanted to see you annoyed.", Husk smiled, walking over to the stairs to take you to your room.
"And stop touching them. Read our fucking contract you dumbass. You're not supposed to lay a hand on anyone I genuinely care about."
Alastor stayed for a moment longer before shadow traveling to his hotel room, going over to his desk and rummaging through it for the contract.
"Where is the blasted old thing.", he mumbled, going through his papers before remembering he could snap it into his hands. "Looks like I really am tired."
He did just that and looked over the contract, skimming through it until he reached the part about protection.
"No touching, holding, dancing or any unnecessary physical contact with any demon I, The Gambling Demon, deem important enough to care about. This includes any blood relatives still alive in Hell."
The Radio Demon laughed.
What a clever cat.
"Let's see where I can find a loophole.", he grabbed a pen to take notes.
Let the game begin.
If you asked to be added but don't find your name in the taglist, please let me know through messages. I'll try to tag you again, and if it still doesn't work then I'll send you updates through messages.
~Seline, the person.
Part 2
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CRY IF I WANT TO ♡
pairing: negan x fem!reader
summary: life has been different since you've been taken to the sanctuary. you're not sure how you fit in here. some may call you one of the wives, but you don't think that's accurate. maybe his pet? his doll? as the days pass, you're not sure it really matters. the distinction doesn't get you any closer to escape.
cw: nsfw (18+), dark fic, smut, dubcon, p in v, oral sex (f receiving), kidnapping/captivity, stockholm syndrome, coercion, forced ddlg/daddy kink, humiliation kink, dacryphilia, violence (from negan, simon, and reader), hurt/comfort sorta
wc: 10.9k (oops lol)
a/n: ermmm... hehe yeah. i've been wanting to write this so i hope someone likes it. reblogs, comments, and asks are appreciated <3
kinktober slot: day 13 - mindbreak (i think)
"Rise and shine, little lady. We got a lot of things to do today."
Your eyes flutter open, the bright light from the window in front of you broken up by the silhouette of the man at your bedside. The sight of him, even just the outline of his body, sends a nauseating crackle of dread through your bones. It's a feeling you can't verbalize of course - not if you want this day to resemble any sort of pleasant.
"There she is," Negan says, speaking with his signature cadence that made you want to rip out your hair, "How'd you sleep, babydoll?"
"Fine," you rasp as you slowly sit up. The mornings were the only time you could get away with dull answers like that. Any small bit of attitude could be blamed on you being 'cranky' rather than feelings of hatred that hadn't been broken down by this point.
He smiles at you, his rough hand cupping your jaw.
"You're so pretty in the mornings," he mumbles, sweeping a thumb over your pouty bottom lip.
You pause for a second, but so does he. Like he expects a reply. Unfortunately, you know the words he wants to hear. Swallowing the last sliver of dignity you have, you force out the response you'd been trained to say over the last however-long.
"Thank you, daddy."
He grins even wider if that's possible and pats your head. "You're welcome. Now let's get you dressed. Like I said, daddy's got a lot to do today."
You get out of bed and follow him over to the dresser that held your outfit for the day. The chill of cold air bites at your legs as the lack of blankets leaves them exposed. The generator had been out for the past day or so, leaving the Sanctuary victim to the harsh Winter raging outside. You were hoping he'd take that into account when picking your clothes, but you didn't hold out too much hope.
The two of you shuffle around the gray furniture of Negan's room. Even though you'd been in here more times than you could count now, you still marveled at the quality of the chairs and sofa. Items like these seemed luxurious with how the world was outside these walls.
When you reach the dresser, you follow the routine you'd become used to. You peel the small shirt you're permitted to sleep in off and drop it in the basket nearby. Your panties are next to go. You pull the dainty garment down and toss it to the same place as your top.
You can feel his eyes on you with every move you make. They watch how your breasts bounce when freed from their confines. They admire the curve of your ass when you bend over. They glimmer with smug satisfaction as you stand there nude before him.
"I'll tell you what. I never get sick of seeing this," he teases.
You offer a weak smile in return. The lack of energy almost seems to please him more.
He walks around to stand behind you, giving you a light pat on the ass as he does. His hands land on your hips first and then slide up to cup your breasts. He pulls you back, positioning you flush against his chest.
"You know I'd keep you like this all the time if I could," he murmurs in your ear, "Sweet and ready for me. Ripe for the pickin' whenever I felt the need."
The deep, gravelly rumble of it seems to trigger a flicker of heat in your lower belly on instinct, and you despise yourself for it. Shame burns so hot in your heart, it threatens to take the nausea you felt earlier into a full on dry heave. You're glad there's not a mirror in front of you. It's easier to keep a docile look plastered on your face when you don't have to stare yourself in the eyes.
The rough pads of his fingertips pinch and tweak your nipples, causing you to squirm a bit where you're standing, but you refuse to give him the satisfaction of a noise. You can feel the warmth of his breath fanning across your neck.
You choose not to say anything to his last statement. There's no guarantee that he hasn't actually considered that, and you don't want to find out. Displaying you in that way in front of everyone doesn't seem like his style, but back when he had you lined up on your knees with the rest of your group, you wouldn't have imagined yourself ever calling him daddy either.
As you'd quickly learned in regards to most things around here, the risk just isn't worth it.
"I'd never do that to you though. Don't think anyone could keep their hands off if they saw all of you, and I just can't have that," he whispers, calming your fears for you. He pulls his hands away from your breasts and steps back to grab the pieces he'd be putting you in today.
He starts with panties. This pair is pink and ruffly just like the last. You step into it with rehearsed timing. One foot then the next. He slides them up to your hips and lets the elastic snap into place against your skin.
You had no clue where he got this shit. You didn't want to believe that his hold on his men was so strong that they'd waste an entire supply run raiding a Victoria's Secret, especially for women they never even got to touch.
It wasn't worth thinking about though. It's not like discovering the origins would spare you from wearing the damn things every day.
Next, Negan shakes the wrinkles out of your dress. You step into that too, just like you did with the underwear. Looking down, you catch a glimpse of the garment.
It's just as humiliating as all the rest he makes you wear. The fabric is bright white and baby pink. Like everything else, you have no idea how it was kept so pristine. The waist is accentuated with a pretty pink ribbon wrapped around it, tied into a large bow at the front. It's extra tight up top and melts into a puffy skirt down below.
He shimmies it over your body and yanks the zipper up in back. The dress conforms to the shape of your figure, leaving little to the imagination in terms of how much the neckline shows and how high the hem of the skirt sits.
Spinning you around, he whistles when he gets the full picture.
"Good God Almighty. Pretty as a picture," he praises, reaching out to pinch your cheek.
Again, you force yourself to smile.
He'd already dressed himself for the day before getting you up, so the rest of the time before you leave the room is spent working through the remnants of your morning routine. He takes you into the bathroom connected to his room to brush your teeth and do your hair.
"Say ah, sweetheart," he smirks before jamming the brush into your mouth.
He's not careful or attentive. He only does it long enough to let the weight of humiliation settle in your stomach. It's always obvious when it kicks in. You get this look on your face like that of an abandoned puppy. Only then does he let you spit and move on to the next task.
He styles your hair into something cute, though you hate it anyway. Like the dress, it's only intended to make you stick out. To draw attention to your status as his possession.
The last thing he does is put your socks and shoes on. Your feet get covered in a pair of frilly ankle socks before he slips a pair of chunky sneakers on you. At least if this place got overrun and you had to bolt, you wouldn't be totally fucked.
"You ready to go, honey?" he asks you when the first part of your torture has finally come to a conclusion.
Again, you nod while looking up at him.
He grins at you. "You're quiet today," he says.
"Sorry, daddy," you respond. The way he said it sounded like teasing, but you could never be too careful.
"Don't be. I like it," he says.
You don't know how he does it, how he deflates you so easily without even trying.
He turns and grabs that stupid bat he carries everywhere, swinging it to his side before facing you again and sticking out his hand.
"Got my two favorite girls, now we're really ready to go," he says. He gestures with his fingers. A small impatient reminder. "You know the rules."
Of course you know what he's referring to. Always hold daddy's hand when you leave the bedroom. One of the rules he'd prattled off to you when he first brought you here.
You reach out and take his outstretched hand, earning a kiss to your head.
The way he'd been holding his arm caused the leather sleeve of his jacket to ride up a bit. Beneath the stiff fabric, you could see the fading scar you'd given him around the same time you'd been informed of the rules. Two crescent shaped marks in the pattern of your teeth.
You can barely stand to look at it now. All it does is bring back memories of when you still held hope for escape or rescue. Back then, you'd thought it'd only be a matter of days until Rick or Michonne burst into the small bedroom they were keeping you in.
The day you'd sunk your teeth into him, he'd just finished giving you one of his speeches about your new life at the Sanctuary. According to him, you'd be so much happier here. Sure you couldn't see your family, but now you had someone better than them. You had him. And he would spoil and take care of a pretty thing like you in the way you deserved. Show off to the rest of your old group how generous he could be.
He'd reached forward to pinch your cheek just like he'd done earlier today. You wanted to smack him away, but he had your hands bound. So you did the next thing you could think of and bit him. Hard.
His eyes burned with fury you hadn't seen since. You can still hear in your mind the way he yelled, shouting "Goddamn it" so loud that the walkers out at the fence probably heard.
After that was a bit hazy. He'd snatched that limb away from you before bringing it back and striking you hard across the cheek. You'd nearly fallen off the bed from the force.
"You little bitch, you try some shit like that again, and I'll knock your fucking jaw loose," he growled before yanking you up right and forcing you to look at him.
Involuntary tears leaked from your eyes as you glared up at his face. Blood oozed from the stinging wound you could feel inside your mouth.
That cut had healed by now though.
You squeeze his hand harder while walking down the hall out of his room. Even though it was the hand that struck you, it was the only thing you had to hold onto now.
Your brain tries to compartmentalize him nowadays. There's Negan, and there's daddy. Negan is the one who gets mean. Negan is the one who yells. Negan is the one who killed your friends. Daddy is the one who cares for you. He keeps you safe and healthy. He'd never hurt you like that. You didn't think you'd survive with a shred of sanity without that distinction.
He feels your little grip and squeezes your hand in return. That's what daddy does.
You stay close to his side as he guides you on the walkway that looks down on the commotion of the main room. Even after what you guessed had been a couple months, if not more, you still didn't like this place. Everything was so transactional. No one cared about each other. It was all about what everyone had to offer. That was by design of course, but it didn't make you any less critical of it.
Your eyes scan the clusters of people below. Although you weren't allowed to socialize on your own, you were starting to get a grasp on the cliques here. Negan's closest advisors all seemed to amalgamate in one area, spare the guy with the burnt face. The table closest to the window was where most of the soldiers ate while the one by the door seated the workers.
You weren't completely sure what class you fit into here.
The most obvious guess would be the group you're about to encounter, Negan's wives. But there are stark differences between you and them that prevent you from feeling camaraderie.
The two of you approach the room where he keeps this group of women. He maintains a tight grip on your hand as you slip through the doors. The disparities between you and the others become obvious as soon as you're within a few feet of them.
All of these women get to dress in black. They stand tall in heels, have earrings dangling next to their faces, and for some, a red tint painting their lips. All of them get to openly glare at him. They don't have to hide their hatred behind a feigned smile or soft laugh.
You know it isn't right to be jealous of them. They're suffering too. This isn't a happy situation for them either. But god, you can't help it. Envy nearly sears a hole through your heart every time you come into this room. What you wouldn't give to be one of them. To be allowed to drink and talk with other people. To not be under the constant threat of punishment.
Despite all these thoughts swirling through your head, you manage to keep your mask on. A simple, thoughtless look on your features as you stand next to him like an oversized accessory.
He looks down at you before dropping your hand.
"Stay right here for me, sweet thing. Daddy's only gonna take a minute," he says.
He stalks off to the back corner of the room with a woman you'd come to learn is named Sherry. They speak in hushed tones, so you can't make out what they're saying. You figure it's about one of the girls sneaking around with some other guy. That's what it's usually about when he makes a stop here with you in tow. Even with their status elevated above yours, they don't get to escape the wrath of his possessiveness.
You stand there awkwardly, arms crossed over your midsection while your weight shifts between your feet. No one tries to talk to you. You can feel their eyes on your pastel form, but their gazes don't hold curiosity or interest. It's pity.
In the beginning, you thought they were looking at you with jealousy. After all, you got your own cell and then graduated to Negan's bedroom while they had to share amenities.
But they weren't naive like you had been. None of them wanted Negan's attention. They didn't want to be his pet or his dolly or whatever the fuck he would classify you as. They had each other, and they got to share the load between all of them.
You sigh quietly and look down at the sparkly trim of your white sneakers.
He finishes his conversation with Sherry and then migrates across the room towards a blonde, crying girl. They speak at the same volume as him and Sherry. It's not worth trying to eavesdrop on.
Instead, you patiently wait the couple minutes it takes for them to finish up and for him to return to you. When he walks back over, you can tell the discussion hadn't been a positive one. His shoulders seem weighed down by whatever information he'd gathered from them.
But the dark cloud above him fades away as his hand slips back into yours. He leads you out of the room just as you'd come in and continues walking with you.
You hesitate but decide to try. "Are you ok?" you ask softly.
His head turns slightly to cast you a look. For a moment, it seems the daddy act has fallen away. He looks at you like he would any other woman who asked him that. Cold. Analytical. But the persona makes its reappearance seconds later as he pulls on a smirk for you.
"Just fine, honey. You don't gotta worry about me," he answers.
You know you should just nod and shut up, but it drives you crazy being led around like a child expected to be seen and not heard. So you decide to try again.
"Did they do something bad?" you ask. You hate how weak your voice comes out. There's no spark to it, no bite or sharp edge. All of that, he'd extinguished in you.
He drops your hand and drapes his arm over your shoulders, pulling you to his side.
"What are you so curious for, huh? You know something about it?" he responds.
You shake your head. Your arm rises and wraps around his torso.
"No. I just don't like when you're upset," you say. You lean your head into his chest to really sell it.
"Oh-ho, look at you. Turning on the charm," he chuckles, "I am just fine, sugar. I swear it. Sometimes those girls give me trouble, but it's nothing I can't handle."
You decide to just take it and nod this time.
He looks at you with satisfaction. "They can't all be like you, y'know? So well-behaved," he praises.
The compliment makes your blood curdle. You couldn't stand that he would act like obedience was your defining trait.
When you were with your group - your family more like - you would never have been described as obedient. Whether at the prison or Alexandria, it felt like every other day you were sneaking off to try something. You were always quick to spring into action, never the type to let someone belittle you. Rick got on your ass about deviating from plans in spurs of emotion more than anyone else. Maybe that's how you wound up here.
You had tried to stop them from taking Daryl. On that dark night in the woods, surrounded by the ring of headlights, you had tried. You didn't rush at Negan like your friend. Not wanting someone else to get their head bashed in, you were more subtle than that. But you attempted to get in the way of the guys carting him off. That's what landed you here. Tucked under his arm, the very weapon that took away two people you love swinging a foot away from you.
But you swallow down all of this rage and nod again. You nuzzle into his chest, a way to conceal the tightening sensation in your throat and the sting of tears at your waterline.
This is the worst part about Negan, you decide. The way he makes you act like you want it.
From your first day here, he made sure to tell you over and over how he's staunchly against rape. He's not a monster. He's not that kind of guy. No, no. You are a prisoner, so yes, technically here against your will, but never in a million years would he violate you in that way.
And he'd stuck true to that. Whenever you screamed or cried or yelled "no" on a loop until he shook you around like a bobble head, he always backed off of his advances. He never copped a feel or slid a wandering hand in your panties while you slept, never held you down or physically forced himself on you.
Instead, he broke you down until saying yes seemed like the only sane option.
You didn't want his affection? That meant you must not want to talk to anyone at all. For days. You didn't want to sit in his lap? Maybe you'd prefer kneeling by his feet for a week, in private and around everyone else. You didn't want to sleep in his bed? Fine. You could sleep on the concrete floor without a pillow or blanket while the heat was out.
You reflect on all of this as the two of you trot through the boxy halls. He takes you around on all his errands for the day. You stop by the doctor's office, inventory, and Dwight's room. All over the place. You stay quiet the whole time. busying yourself with your thoughts as you stay attached to him.
Everyday the line between survival and free will becomes blurrier. You tell yourself that you have to be like this with him. You'll be worse off if you don't act the part of the sweet, adoring girl he wants. But then sometimes you wonder if you truly are becoming obedient. Like a wildcat tamed into a lazy house pet. You almost never resist his touch anymore. You even go to him for comfort sometimes.
The idea kills you, so you deem it best not to think about for now.
Rather, you focus on guessing what the rest of the day would hold. It's already the afternoon by now. The sun hangs low by the tree line, shimmering into the Sanctuary through the rectangular windows across the walls. He wouldn't have a meeting with the lieutenants today. Those were almost always around lunch time. You didn't think he'd spend it with one of his wives either. If that was the case, he usually gave you a heads up in the morning.
The most likely possibility you come up with is the dilemma from earlier. You had never been invited to see the culmination of those though. Normally, he kept you safe and sound in his room while he tended to matters like that, ready to provide him some stress relief when he finished.
But things can always change, and now it seems like that's the case.
He guides you back into the main room. A crowd has gathered down below. You can't see the center point of their conglomeration. All you can sense are the nerves vibrating between everyone.
Their feet shuffle around on the hard concrete flooring. They look between each other with anxious eyes. Hushed chatter clouds the area until you and Negan begin to descend the stairs. That's when they all go quiet. Mouths close and pupils snap to the position of their leader.
You look down to lessen the ache of humiliation that came with accompanying the center of attention. The few times you had scanned the crowd for others' reactions, seeing if you could find a sympathetic gaze or outraged expression, all you found was animosity. The male workers and soldiers leered at you. They smiled and smirked, visibly amused by your girly outfits and docile disposition. On the other side of the aisle, the women glared, taking in the details of your appearance with disgust, like somehow it was your fault you got toted around like this.
His voice booms out to his audience as he takes step after step towards them.
"You all know what we're here for today," he starts, "We got simple rules 'round here, but some people still seem to have trouble following 'em."
Your hand stays linked with his as the two of you reach the landing.
"Watch your step, babydoll," he murmurs to you before continuing his speech. Your cheeks burn with shame.
"It feels like I'm doing this every other month. It's getting ridiculous," he lectures, "I don't like having to be so harsh. Truly, I don't. But rules are rules, and I don't know how I can make myself any clearer. They are not optional."
He walks further into the room with you. Being level with everyone else, you can see more of what's happening. They're gathered around a furnace. Dwight stands near the opening to the flames, clearly preparing something. Another man sits a few feet away. Over in the corner, the woman from earlier is looking at him and crying.
Looks like your guess was correct.
"So we're gonna do this again. Hopefully it's the last time," he concludes.
The crowd parts as you and him head towards the center of the room. He leads you over to an empty spot near the wall. Dropping your hand, he cups your jaw and makes you look him in the eyes.
"Stay right here for me. Daddy'll be right back," he says.
You nod and then watch as he turns away, waltzing over to where Dwight stands.
While your eyes are up, they can't help but catch on somebody familiar standing at the front of the crowd.
Daryl.
Your heart stutters, and you can see on his face that his does too. He looks worn down. Eyes dimmed and face hollowed. His clothes, dirty and ill-fitting. You start to feel tears pricking at your waterline from the sight. You weren't the only one they'd broken down.
In him, you find the compassion you'd been searching for. The look that told you at least one person here didn't take enjoyment from your suffering. But it comes from someone who truly can't help you. Who's in a situation as bad as your own.
You sniffle and try to wipe away any beginning tears before Negan or someone who would tell him notices.
The loud creak of a metal door opening drags your attention to the furnace though. You watch as Dwight pulls out the item he'd been preparing. A burning, metal iron becomes the new focus of everyone in the room.
Upon seeing the small object, so many things connect in your head. You know what's going to happen. You realize why Dwight's face is scarred. You understand why that woman is crying. And you know no one is going to stop any of this now or in the future.
Your heart pounds harder, and your breaths become shaky. Tears blur your vision further. You dig your nails into your palm to try and ground yourself, but it doesn't help. The scene in front of you has whipped your mind into a frenzy. You haven't felt this bad since the early weeks of being in this place.
This stupid fucking place. You hate it. You hate how cruel it is here. How disconnected and lifeless everything feels. You hate him for being the only one allowed to really live. You hate everyone else here for letting him get this powerful.
It's a complete spiral whirlpooling in your mind, only made worse by the fact that you have to keep it contained. You try to tell yourself you just have to wait it out. This couldn't take more than five minutes and then you could go back to the bedroom. You'd be ok. You could take off this itchy dress and put your hair back to how you like it. You could kick off these shoes and hide yourself beneath the warm blankets. None of these people would be around, all you'd have is the quiet between those walls where daddy could make it all better.
As you're in the process of mentally talking yourself down, Negan takes hold of the iron. To free up his hands, he offers Lucille off to someone nearby. Your eyes follow his leather-clad limb to the neck of the bat and then up to its new handler. You see Simon.
You have to look down now. If you don't, everyone here will see the look of pure terror on your face. You close your eyes and rein in whimpers that threaten to spill from your lips. Everything feels fuzzy around you, intangible and like your hands would drift right through them. Your head heats up, the sensation making you dizzy. You try to steady yourself by leaning back against the wall, but the cool, flat surface does little to ease your nerves.
It does even less when you hear his voice closing in on you.
"Hey there, princess," he starts, voice laced with mockery, "You feeling alright?"
You're not looking at him, but the image of his stupid face projects with HD clarity in your mind. You swallow hard and nod.
Laughing lowly, he comes to stand beside you. "You sure about that? You're looking kind of lightheaded," he taunts.
"I'm fine," you choke out.
His hand darts up and grabs your jaw. He doesn't gently guide your eyes where he wants them to look. He yanks your face in his direction like an unruly child with a doll.
"I don't know about that. You're looking kind of rough," he says while glaring down at you with those ruthless eyes, "Maybe I should take you over to the doctor's. We both know Negan wants his favorite toy kept in good condition."
Your entire body vibrates with hatred for this creature. Every breath you take acts as an effort of restraint, a way to lull yourself into not ripping out what hair he has left.
You didn't just despise Simon because he's an asshole or because he was the person harassing your group leading up to that horrible night you were taken. Your aversion for him stems from experiences entirely your own.
A few days after the biting incident, you had tried getting physical with Negan one more time. You'd managed to worm one of your wrists out of your restraints, and instead of aiming for escape, you decided revenge held a higher priority. You waited for him to come check on you, keeping your arm tucked to your body as if it was still bound.
When he finally came in, you sat there and took the speech, took the condescension, and took the promises that you would conform. And then he leaned a bit closer. That's when you backhanded him as hard as he had you the few days prior.
After the hit landed, you lunged forward and tried to wrap the rope connected to you around his neck. You pulled as hard as you could, and for a moment, you thought you had won.
But wrangling you off was easier than you anticipated. They hadn't been allowing you much food or sleep, so the strike took most of your energy. It only took him a handful of seconds to snake his hand under the rope and then pry your arms away.
He stood up and slammed you into the wall with his hand around your throat. In that moment, he didn't look at you with the same fury he had before. This time around, frustration dominated his gaze.
"Was that fun for you?" he asked.
You didn't answer. Your chest puffed with exertion while your eyes stared daggers into him.
"What did I tell you last time? What did I fucking tell you?" he asked. Despite the look in his eye being less volatile, his tone of voice was dangerous as ever. "I told you I would knock that jaw of yours loose. That's what I said, and I meant it. I don't want you thinking I didn't. But I'm not gonna do that right now because I don't think it would work, and I'm not one to waste my own time."
Internally, pride swelled in your chest, thinking you had called his bluff. But then he kept speaking.
"I have a bad feeling that if I struck some sense into you that you'd just try to strike it into me right back, and I can't have that. That's just not gonna fly around here," he said, "So I'll tell you what: I have a better idea. You don't wanna play with daddy? Then you can spend a weekend with your Uncle Simon. See how much fun he can be."
Back then, you didn't know Simon as the right hand man. You didn't have his name and face connected yet. Now, you wished you could go back to that state of mind.
You were with him for three days while Negan did a tour of the outposts and subjugated communities. Only 72 hours. But an hour of him would have been enough to scare you for a lifetime.
When he first came into the room, you didn't get the feeling that him and Negan would handle you so differently. You could tell from the way he looked at you that, like his boss, he looked at you as something to toy with. A source of amusement. The difference, you soon found out, was how they played with their toys.
Unlike daddy, Simon didn't talk just to talk. He didn't warn you of future spankings or timeouts. He hit. And he kicked. And he shoved you down and tossed you around. He didn't offer the same condolences daddy did, there was no "this hurts me more than it hurts you." Nothing he did even bothered Simon. He watched you hurt, and he enjoyed it.
You didn't even get a reward once you'd settled down. Your attitude had disappeared almost instantly. Having the wind knocked out of you once was enough for you to become more amicable, but your change in demeanor didn't phase him. It wasn't his goal.
The only rules Negan left him with were the basic ones for the Sanctuary along with no killing you or causing permanent damage. But that didn't mean he couldn't threaten you with breaking them. He went on and on during the down periods where you cowered in the corner or huddled against the wall of your bedroom cell, telling you stories of how he went rogue before. Any horrible thing he could think of, he dangled in front of you as a potential fate.
When Negan finally came back, you eagerly awaited him. Despite your sleep deprived and bruised condition, your eyes stayed locked on the door like a puppy expecting their master. For the next week, you latched onto him. Didn't want to leave his side. He had made his point. You could hate him as much as you wanted but leave you alone with Simon for a little while, and you'd beg for him back.
That's how you feel right now, staring up into Simon's eyes while he holds your jaw. The pressure his fingers put on your cheeks serve as a reminder of the pain he can inflict while his other hand holding the bat twirls the weapon near your calf. As much as you had been internally preaching your hatred for everything to do with Negan minutes ago, all you want to do now is run into his arms.
You feel more tears wanting to slip down your cheeks, but you try your best to hold them in. The more you cry, the more I like it. That's what he'd told you more than once over those three days.
"Just leave me alone," you tell him. You try to sound as firm as possible, but even your own ears catch the way your voice quivers. "Negan wouldn't like you talking over him."
Your attempt at taking a stand falls flat. He doesn't back off any, rather, he leans in closer.
"Negan, huh? Are you even allowed to call him that?" he mocks and feigns a pout.
"Just shut up!" you say. You mean it as a threat; though, it hits his ears like a plea. More hot panic rushes down your spine from the stress of having to remain quiet while also trying to be assertive.
His lips flatten into a line before he continues speaking. "Your head's getting too big for those shoulders, little girl. You better watch your attitude, or I might have to suggest you're due for some more correction," he mutters.
A loud scream rips the two of you from your conversation. He drops his hand from your face, and you both straighten up against the wall. Negan stands in the center of the room, pressing the blazing iron to the side of the man's face.
He wails until he passes out, and that's when his leader peels away the device of torture. Sticky skin goes with it before snapping back against his face like a rubber band. You grimace, your stomach twisting at the sight. You'd seen so much blood and guts over the years of living out on the road and fighting with other groups, but melted skin was a new one.
Negan turns to Dwight and gives him the iron back. You breathe an involuntary sigh of relief, subconsciously soothed by the thought of him returning to your side.
The reprieve ends suddenly though when a small, sharp pain slices along the meat of your calf. You whimper and lift your leg away on instinct. Looking for the source, you see the bat twirling from the motion of Simon's wrist. One of the barbs had caught your skin. Your eyes flit up to him.
"Watch out!" you say. The old you would have been seething. She would have pulled out her pocket knife and given him a little receipt for the cut. But now, you watch him with fearful eyes, trying to gauge whether or not you would get in trouble for calling him an asshole.
"Remember what I said," he tells you quietly as a trickle of red runs down to the lacy frills of your sock.
Before you can respond, a warm hand lands on the small of your back. Your head turns to find Negan smiling down at you.
"What's with the long face, sugar? Simon bothering you?" he asks, clearly not meaning it seriously even though to you it is exactly that.
You part your lips to answer, but Simon beats you to it.
"Bothering her? C'mon. I'm just checking up on her. She looked a little dizzy, so I offered to take her to the doctor's," he says, light as ever, "I'm just watching out for her, y'know? Sweet thing like her will get eaten alive here if she's not careful."
Negan raises his eyebrows, and for a second, you think he's about to take your side. But then he just chuckles and shakes his head.
"She's doing just fine. That was her first time seeing one of those, so she's probably a little shaken up," he says, rubbing your arm.
"Hm... Sounds about right," Simon replies, "I know that's not how her little group did things."
"Yeah. So I'll get her back to the room. Think you can handle shit down here?" he says, gesturing around to the dispersing crowd.
"Always," Simon says with a mock salute. He then hands Lucille back.
Finally, you find some relief, some true sanctuary as Simon walks away. Your body physically relaxes. Negan feels it underneath his arm and spares you a glance as the two of you walk back up the stairs.
"Is something wrong?" he asks.
You want to just take the easy route and say no, to play along with this sadistic charade and not cause any trouble. But you can't get the single syllable out. It feels impossible to even shake your head. Even though Simon's gone, the weight of everything that happened still remains along with the stinging in your leg.
Your throat feels tight, and your eyes feel like they're two seconds from overflowing. The lights suddenly seem too bright, and everyone here is too loud. You can't show him that though. You don't want more correction. You don't want someone to like it when you cry. But you can't ignore him either. That would be the worst thing to do.
All you manage in response is a shaky shrug. You let out a broken sigh with it and lean into his chest. The tension in your shoulders returns as you fight to keep the tears from leaking out against the worn leather.
At first, he doesn't say anything, and the two of you keep walking. Your steps remain in time with his as you traverse the walkway and around the corner. Then the two of you come to a stop when you're out of sight. He turns you by your shoulders, holding you in front of him so that you can't shy away.
"I got one more thing to attend to out by the fence. Think you can handle that?" he asks.
Your heart pulses to an uneven rhythm, trying to decide what to do without devolving into pure panic. You bite your lip as you mull your options over. Say yes and go with him. Then inevitably fail to contain yourself and get in trouble. Or, say no now and risk punishment for being defiant. You're not sure which one will end up worse.
"Can... can we just go back to the room?" you ask. Your voice comes out weak as if every word siphons a drop of energy from you.
He eyes you with uncertainty of his own; though, there's no fear in his look. His gaze is careful, an attempt to decipher if this is some kind of deception. You'd been pretty well-behaved as of late, but one bad day could take even the most obedient pet to a rabid dog, jaws primed to gnash.
But you didn't really have a reason to lie. The bedroom with him would provide the least likely chance at escape, and in the condition you were in now, you didn't seem to be planning an attack.
Slowly, he nods. "Sure, honey. I'll have Arat handle the other shit," he tells you before leading you in the direction of his bedroom.
The words he mumbles through his radio sound distant to you. You watch your legs switch between one and the other as you walk. On your right, you see the small red splotch staining the pristine cloth of your sock.
Before you know it, he's pushing open the bedroom door and bringing you inside. It then closes behind you, creating a barrier between you and everything else out there. It gets a little easier to breathe.
He guides you the few steps over to the edge of the bed and sits down, pulling you onto his lap. You feel his eyes scanning over you in an attempt to figure out the problem without asking. His hand rubs up and down your back over the crinkly fabric of your dress. His other palm focuses on your legs, coasting over your knees and the area of your thighs the skirt doesn't cover.
The code is harder for him to crack than usual. Normally when you got upset, it resulted from something he said. And he knows that because, usually, that's his intention. It was always either that or you'd just generally be feeling down, missing your home. But that doesn't seem to be the case right now. You seem more antsy than your normal bouts of sadness. He doesn't think it was from watching the spectacle downstairs. He knows you hate the saviors indiscriminately. Watching some random guy's face melt off wouldn't have you this upset. Finally, he relents.
"What's wrong?" he asks. He actually makes an effort not to sound like he'll make fun of whatever your answer may be.
"I just don't feel good," you choke out and bite your lip.
He feels you shudder on his lap, and he knows it's not the full truth. Pulling you a little closer on his thighs, he continues to look down at you.
"C'mon, baby. Tell daddy what hurts," he coaxes.
Your face tenses, but you know he won't drop this. "Just... just... I don't know. A lotta stuff," you say. You couldn't decide on a lie to commit to.
He sighs and bounces his leg with you on it a few times. "Did someone say something to you? Was someone bothering you?" he asks as his scope of potential causes narrow.
You're in the middle of trying to think of a cover story when his hand glides down to remove your shoes. He knocks one off. Then the other. The foamy white sneakers clatter to the ground next to his foot.
He goes to bring his hand back up, dragging it over the fine threading of your socks, but his eyes catch on the bloody splotches near the edge. Grabbing your ankle, he tugs your limb upward. It puts you at an awkward angle and nearly knocks you from your perch on his thigh. He stares the small wound down, assessing every detail of the tiny scrape.
"How'd you get this?" he asks. He looks over to you.
In reality, it may have been the most standard question in the world. But it hits your ears like an accusation and brings a fresh wave of tears that you can't control. Your lip quivers as your lids blink a few droplets over your water line.
"Simon did it," you weep.
You're scared he won't believe you, but after a few seconds, he drops your foot and pulls you close. His arms wrap around you tight and keep you flush against his chest. The warmth of the embrace encompasses you. You let the dam burst and cry into him, pouring all your sadness out against his body.
His hand sweeps up and down your back in comforting strokes. "Shh, shh, shh, sweetheart. Daddy's got you," he murmurs.
You feel him shrug off his jacket and push it aside, leaving the plain material of his t-shirt to soak up your anguish. He keeps you as close as possible. One of his hands cradles the back of your head to ensure you don't pull away.
"Does Simon bother you a lot?" he asks.
You nod. "Whenever I'm not with you," you choke out.
He hums in acknowledgement. "I'll talk to him. He's not supposed to hurt you when you're being such a good girl for daddy."
"I was trying really hard," you sob, your voice cracking, "I've been trying to be good. But he just hates me anyway. He's so mean to me."
Your arms snake around him as tight as a pair of snakes aiming to kill. You cling to him with everything you have, as if he's your one true savior from this living hell and not the cause of it.
In your head, you feel like you're annoying him. He's probably waiting for you to calm down, so he can nip this blossom of resentment in the bud. Good girls don't have tantrums or meltdowns, right? And all he cares about is that you act the part of a good girl.
But you only think all of that because you can't see the smile on his face right now.
He's grinning more than any of the times he got you to say something humiliating or cooperate with a punishment. The look he displays now reaches a new level of smugness, higher than the night he killed two of your people and traumatized the rest of them. His satisfaction runs deeper this time because right now, you're truly broken.
This isn't something you agreed to because the other option was worse. It's not something he had to coach you into or manipulate a situation into becoming. You did this all on your own. You came to him. Sure, he had to coax it out of you a little bit, but once he got his foot in the door, you let him right in. You're clinging to him for comfort, looking to him for a solution. He couldn't be more pleased. This is exactly what he wanted - to break you down. Now he just had to reel you back in the slightest bit, get you in that perfect middle ground between too independent and non-functioning.
"You have been doing really good for me, y'know? I'm proud of you, baby," he tells you in the most earnest tone he can manage, "Don't worry about Simon for right now, ok? Daddy's gonna set him straight. He won't bother you again."
You nod, but the reassurance doesn't stop the flow of tears from your eyes. Your fingers stay clenched around the fabric of his shirt.
"No more tears, honey, c'mon," he coos. He pries your limbs from around him and boosts you to your feet, standing you between his thighs. "I'll take care of it just like I take care of you. Let's just worry about what my little baby needs to feel better right now."
You take a few seconds to think about it, but the answer comes with relative ease. The most agitating thing about this situation right now is wrapped all around you, scratching at your sides and digging in under your arms.
"Can you take my dress off?" you sniffle.
His eyes fall from your face over your body. "What? You don't like this pretty little number?" he teases.
For once, you don't feel like you're two seconds away from punishment. You feel like it's a joke, and you don't have to awkwardly straddle the line between playing along with the humor and submitting to the literal interpretation.
"It's ok... it's just kinda scratchy," you say and wipe away your tears with the back of your hand.
"Spin around for me then. We'll get it off you. Can't have it irritatin' that soft skin while you're tryin' to relax."
You take the few steps to turn around. His fingers grasp the zipper and undo the baby pink prison you'd been trapped in for the day. Feeling the chafing fabric pulled away from you lets you take a real breath for the first time in hours. Already a small bit of relief. It only compounds when the garment hits the floor and pools at your feet.
He tugs you back by the waist and lays you across the bed, body on full display for him. Right now, you don't mind his gaze tracking your curves. He leans over you, his hands coasting from the sides of your breasts down to your hips.
"You're prettier like this anyways, princess," he praises.
"Thank you, daddy." It spills out as naturally as water from a faucet.
He rewards you with his lips on your stomach instead of words. Kissing the smooth, warm skin, his lips travel from just above your navel to the divot between your breasts. Your nipples rise to attention automatically.
His hands slide up to cup your mounds of flesh. He fondles and gropes them as his lips migrate up the curves to the hardening little peaks. They don't latch on just yet. He teases them with kisses instead, letting the anticipation of blissful suction build.
You take your lip between your teeth as you watch him. Chills break out across the rest of your body. You know you should be fighting. You know you should kick and scream and cry. You should try to take advantage of his closeness and get towards your revenge. But in your hellish life, are you not allowed one moment of pleasure? You haven't let those plans of escape and vengeance go, but you want this right now. You want to feel good, and he gives you that.
This isn't Negan. This is daddy. And you don't wanna hurt daddy.
His tongue peeks out from between his lips to trace wet circles around your nipple. The sensation draws a whine from you. Your body squirms beneath him with an eagerness to feel more.
"I think I know how to make you feel better. Take your mind off all that stuff from before," he whispers.
He takes one of your nipples between his lips, flicking the bud with the tip of his tongue and scraping his teeth against the sensitive area. You reward the choice with a mewl and squirm your legs. He chuckles and then switches to the other one.
"That feel good?" he asks.
You nod, your head tilting back and your eyes fluttering.
Grinning, he continues his work on your chest. You whine and squirm for him, giving him all the reactions he craves. Soon, his hand ghosts up your inner thigh. His fingertips drag over the flesh and land on your clothed center. Through the thin pink cloth, he rubs at your clit. That garners a breathy moan and a full body shudder.
"Goddamn, you are so cute," he chuckles, "Just a few little touches and you squirm around like a virgin for me."
Heat floods your cheeks, but you don't bother disputing the claim. It was the truth. You weren't sure what it was about him that got you so amped up and needy.
The pad of his middle finger swirls around the little nub in your panties. He can already feel the fabric getting sticky from the wetness between your thighs.
"Poor baby. You're so easy to play with," he says.
His mouth leaves your breasts now and begins to retrace its path down your stomach. It glides over your skin with open-mouthed kisses all the way down to the hem of your underwear. His fingers fall away from your center to your dismay.
Your disappointment is short lived though. You feel him position your thighs on his shoulders. When you look down, his eyes are staring right back up at you, gleaming like that of a panther ready to pounce.
"You want daddy's mouth on you? Will that help you feel better?" he rasps.
You nod quickly. "Please, daddy," you whimper.
"So polite. You didn't even need me to remind you of your manners," he smirks.
You don't even care about that remark. It washes right over you. All your mind is concerned with right now is getting more of his touch.
He brings his index finger back between your legs. He hooks it beneath the soaked seat of your panties, pulling it to the side and revealing your slick folds to him. The thumb on his opposite hand comes up to rub over the length of your slit up to your clit. Back and forth, nice and slow, just to tease you.
Your hips writhe the slightest bit, and he nips the skin of your inner thigh.
"Tsk. You know good girls are patient. They don't wriggle around. I've taught you better than that," he chides.
"Sorry," you say, backing down quickly.
"It's alright. I know you're having a rough day, so I'll let it slide this time," he says. He then leans in to lay some kisses on your clit.
Your eyes roll back and your toes curl. He never let things slide. This must have been a miracle. The same man who always toted that the rules weren't optional, letting you bypass one? Maybe you were his favorite. That's what you took it as anyways.
He makes out with your cunt like it's the prettiest thing he's ever seen. His lips engulf it, spreading his affection from your little bundle of nerves all the way down, nearly reaching your puckered entrance below. You whine and clutch at the bedsheets. You were still too scared to grab his hair. You weren't sure if he'd like it and groan or glare at you in a way that said you'd pay for it later.
It doesn't matter to you right now though. What you hold isn't important when you feel this good. It feels like a firework show is erupting in your belly, bright bursts of all different colors. Your heels dig into his back, subconsciously keeping him buried between your thighs.
He's tempted to tear your panties off and fling them aside. He would if not for the limited number in his possession. If this was normal life, he'd rip a pair to shreds on a weekly basis. These things were so cute when he put them on, but when he wanted at you, he despised them. If this was normal life, he'd just buy you new ones whenever a tattered one had to be tossed. But then again, if this was normal life, he wouldn't have you at all, so it isn't really worth thinking about.
Refocusing his mind on your pleasure, he dives further into your cunt. His nose bumps your clit as his tongue fucks into you. He pushes it in a few times before pulling back and just lapping at your pussy in broad strokes, getting every drop of you he can. Two of his fingers prod at your entrance before slipping in. They fuck deeper than his tongue, but don't stretch you out like his cock. A happy medium to walk the steps of preparation.
He maneuvers his digits with expert precision, scissoring and curling them at the perfect intervals. You can't help the way your hips buck in response. He doesn't get on you about it though. He just wraps your arms around his hips and holds you in place.
Your thighs squeeze around his head too. Luckily, that wasn't against the rules. He loved feeling the heat of your plush legs wrapped around his skull, keeping him close.
He pumps his fingers faster, curling them right against that spot that got you to squeal and cry out his name.
"Cum for me, babydoll. All over my face. I wanna feel it," he rasps.
It's a fortunate coincidence he gives you that command because you were about two swipes of his tongue away from doing it on your own. You melt against the bed, eyes fluttering and body jerking and quivering as rushes of pleasure sweep through you.
Your fingers grip the blankets so tight they threaten to tear into them, but then they loosen completely and go lax next to your hips. He licks your cunt through the entire thing, not letting you come down until the euphoria has thoroughly washed through you.
While you're lying there, dazed and blissed out, he untangles himself from your legs and stands at the edge of the bed. He wipes your nectar from his facial hair before pulling his shirt over his head and unzipping his pants.
"I think daddy deserves a little reward for making you feel so good, pretty girl. What do you say?" he asks.
Of course, you nod. There was no way you would reject him while still so close to the high of your last release. He grins at your hazy movement and shoves down his pants, jerking his cock a few times and crawling on the bed to hover over you.
"You're such a good girl for me. Better than I ever thought you'd be," he says while looking down at your face.
"Wanna be good for you, daddy," you say softly, blinking at him with your misty doe eyes.
His grin spreads even wider. In your sane mind, you probably would have thought it looked like some creature out of hell. But right now, the look just makes you giggle and squirm.
Down below, he lines up at your entrance. He slides his tip through your arousal a few times, getting it nice and wet before he sinks in. A smile of your own rises on your face, and he groans at the deep satisfaction of having your cunt embrace him so readily.
"Perfect little pussy, fuck," he grunts, "Think it's the best I've ever had."
You preen at that compliment. He balances his forearms on each side of your head as he begins to thrust. Your legs rise up and lazily wrap around his waist, which he loves. He can't get enough of the fact that you want him, that you're pushing him deeper and not letting him pull out too much.
His head falls beside yours, letting you hear every pant and grunt that falls from his lips. Your walls squeeze around him every so often. The noises make your tummy flutter for him. It drives you wild to know you brought him to such a state of lust.
"Christ, you're so fucking tight," he mumbles.
You giggle again and drape your arms around his shoulders. Your eyes flutter shut. You just get lost in the feeling of him inside you, his cock battering all your sweet spots just right. He leans in and kisses at your neck. His hips pump deeper, ramming his shaft further into the warm depth of you.
In this moment, everything feels so good and pure. You can't even imagine any of the pain he inflicted on you before. It all feels like a distant dream. Memories that belonged to someone else, not you. At this second, it feels as though this bliss will last forever. Just you and him tangled in the throes of passion without a concern for anything else happening beyond the privacy of his room.
When you open your eyes, they're a little watery from all the stimulation and how good it feels mixed with your saccharine thoughts. You arch off the bed a few inches, pushing your pert breasts against the warmth of his chest. He pushes you back down with ease, keeping you angled exactly where he wants you.
Pulling back a little to look at your face, he smiles when he sees the water gathering in your eyes.
"Oh, those are the tears I like to see," he croons.
You moan, a little shiver coursing through you. It only encourages him to pound his hips harder against you, in and out, in and out, until you're both approaching the edge.
"You gonna cum again for me, sweetheart? Show daddy how good he's making you feel?" he murmurs.
"Yeah, mhm, ah-" you whimper, "I wanna cum daddy, wanna cum for you."
"I know you do," he chuckles, "I can feel it."
Your cunt contracts and releases around him with increased frequency now. He knows you're moments away from reaching the peak. Swiveling his hips, he tries to strike that chord and bring you crashing down.
You whimper, the pitch getting higher as the glass gets closer to shattering. Finally, with one good jerk of his pelvis, you tense up and cry out. A couple tears trickle from your eyes. Your nails dig into his shoulder blades.
Your body trembles and rolls with the feeling. He fucks you through it, savoring every delicious squeeze of your cunt around him. A few breathless groans rumble out of him. He gets every last second in your hole he can before he has to pull out.
He snaps his hips back, replacing the tightness of your pussy with his hand. It's not the same, but it will do. He gives it a few quick strokes before he explodes and spills on your belly. You lift your head and watch as the ropes of hot, sticky cum land on your skin.
His hips jerk with each surge of release firing from him. When he finishes, his head hangs, and he takes a moment to catch his breath. He scoots off of you and cools down beside your body on the bed. It's quiet for a few moments; though, he's never one to be vulnerable, so he doesn't let the silence linger for too long.
"You feeling better?" he asks and rotates his head to look at you.
You nod, visibly more relaxed than before.
"Thank you, daddy," you say, sweet as can be, before leaning in and pecking his lips.
He stares at you for a few moments in fond satisfaction. Then he gets up, and pulls you to your feet with him.
"C'mon. Let's get you cleaned up," he says.
You follow obediently to the bathroom where he wipes you off with a damp rag and makes sure you're all set to get some rest after. Both of you make your way to the dresser next. He pulls another set of those panties out and slips you into them. They don't feel so horrible this time around, but in the back of your mind, you're sure that won't be the case tomorrow morning. A soft, thin shirt covers your upper body next. It's the same baby pink color as the dress, but you don't mind since it's much more comfortable.
On your own, you tuck yourself to his side for the short walk back to the bed. He climbs in first and then tugs you into your spot next to him.
"I want you to try and get some rest," he tells you, stroking down the side of your face, "When you wake up, I'll get you something to eat, but for now, I want you to take a nap, ok?"
You aren't particularly tired, but while living here, sleep has become your greatest method of escape. You never reject a chance at it. The only thing is, right now, you don't really want to escape. You don't feel a horrible gnawing sensation from being so close to him.
However, you agree anyways because daddy knows best for you, and you don't want to make him upset.
You lie your head on his chest and snuggle up to him. He holds you close, rewarding the compliance by rubbing your back.
"Sweet dreams, babydoll," he murmurs.
You shut your eyes, allowing your mind to recede into visions of the life and people you had before this. The life you still hoped one day you would get back, even as it became more and more like a fantasy rather than a realistic future.
#negan x reader#negan smut#negan x you#negan smith x reader#negan smith x you#negan smith smut#twd x reader#twd smut#twd imagine#twd x you#twd x y/n
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girllll, we need a part 2 for “behave back there”!! it was so good! it could be what happened in their hotel room after the car ride hehe
nsfw ੈ✩‧₊˚ mdni
'𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐝.'
𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘪𝘥 𝘹 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳
'𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦.' 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘵𝘸𝘰.
after you took your time teasing spencer during a car ride back to the hotel, he decides it's time to take what your body has been promising him...
wc: 1.3k
content & tw: smut. this is just smut. dom!spencer, sub!reader, fem!reader, risk of being caught, pleasurable punishment, choking, use of a gag, spence being a munch, fucking the attitude out of you, dirty talk.
a/n: i am honoured people were actually asking for a part two of this so i tried my very best here!!
['shut up,' spencer said, his voice cracking slightly on the nerves, but you know that in about thirty minutes, he will be knocking on your hotel room door and he will be everything but for nervous...] - ending of 'behave back there'.
you know garcia is the true oracle of quantico, but you feel like you deserve an honorary mention in that title, because it is exactly thirty minutes after you left the car that spencer knocks on your door.
you take one quick look thru the peephole, just to be completely sure it's him, and smile as you open the door slightly to see your favorite profiler standing there. 'doctor reid, what are you doing here? do you even know what time it is?' you say, a sly smirk on your face.
'cut the crap, princess. you know exactly why i'm here,' he says, his voice low and husky. you don't even have time to throw back another snarky remark before spencer pushes the door open and slams your back against the wall, kicking the door closed behind him.
he wastes no time, passionately connecting his body to yours, the two of you coming together in a mix of lips, teeth and tongues. 'damn, spence, i had no idea i had this much of an effect on-' you start to speak, but spencer cuts off your breath, wrapping his hand around your throat. 'shut up, brat, you knew exactly what you were doing.'
he holds his hand on your throat, using the other one to lead you backwards towards the bed. when your legs hit the frame, he pushes you onto it. you catch yourself and watch as he undoes his tie and throws his sweater vest to the floor.
he leans down, his body towering over yours as he pins your arms into place above your body. 'fuck, that was the longest car ride of my life,' he pants between passionate kisses. you start to speak, but spencer silences you immediately with a passionate kiss.
'if you know what's good for you, you will shut the fuck up. i am this close to losing my shit already, and if you give me that attitude i fear neither of us will get any rest tonight,' he says. there is a certain darkness in his eyes, a hunger that you know exactly how to still. as much as you love being a brat, you're well aware that now is the time to be obedient.
'i'm yours, doctor. whatever you need,' is the last thing you say before wisely keeping your mouth shut. spencer smirks against your lips, 'fuck, that's my good girl,' he says, his hard length already pressing against you.
he kisses down your body, pulling your shirt over your head and unbuttoning his own blouse as he bites the soft skin of your lower stomach.
he unbuttons your jeans, pulling them off your body with haste, your underwear coming off with them. before you know it, spencer lowers his mouth to your core, licking and sucking like theres no tomorrow.
'oh... oh...' you moan, your eyes shutting instinctively. you feel spencer smile against your sensitive skin. 'i'd try to be quiet, princess. hotch is over in the next room, morgan on the other side,' he says. you look down at him, his hair already messy as he looks up at you with sparkling eyes.
he licks you exactly where it feels good, and you just know he's proud of himself. it's almost like his movements are saying you should have behaved, i can tease you just as good as you can tease me.
you feel your orgasm building inside of you, crashing over your body like a tidal wave before you know it. you cover your mouth with your hands and squeeze your eyes shut as you try desperately not to make a noise. the idea of hotch or morgan, or worse, hotch and morgan, hearing what's going on here makes you nervous, and the nerves make you hornier than ever before.
you're pretty sure spencer shares the same excitement as he doesn't slow down or change his movements in the slightest. not even when your thighs squeeze around his legs as your second orgasm ripples thru you. 'fuck, princess,' he whispers in between strokes of his tongue, 'are you trying to suffocate me? oh well, if this is how i die, i'll die a happy man.'
that sentence is enough to unravel you again, this time not being able to keep quiet. 'f- fuck!' you moan, probably loud enough to be heard thru the walls. you immediately feel your cheeks heat. spencer tsks and moves himself back up towards you, unbuttoning his trousers and freeing his cock from the confines of his underwear.
he kicks his trousers to the floor, but holds his boxers into one of his hands. 'i don't believe this pretty mouth won't get us into trouble, baby... open up,' he commands, and you do as your told, following thru on your previous promise and open your mouth. spencer stuffs the black cotton boxers into your mouth as a makeshift gag.
'how's that, princess?' he asks, and you try your best to form words but obviously, they come out muffled and far from articulated. 'what's that? i can't understand you,' spencer says mockingly before kissing your neck and positioning the head of his cock with your entrance.
'if anything is wrong, tap anywhere on my body twice and i stop immediately, understood?' he asks, and you nod. that was all spencer needed before pushing himself deep inside you. he buries his cock into your body all the way to the hilt, and you bite down onto the fabric, soft whimpers escaping thru it.
'oh my god, baby, you feel so fucking good,' spencer groans softly before settling into a steady but punishing pace. you feel your orgasm building already as he hits the most sensitive parts of your body.
you moan as quietly as you can, but you know if there was no risk of getting caught, you would be screaming his name until your throat hurt. he fills you up completely and you feel him thru your entire body.
your moans climb the scale like a symphony reaching its crescendo, every sound escaping from your lips reaching a higher and higher pitch until your body tenses and you fall apart underneath him.
'i love the sounds you make when you're trying to be quiet,' spencer says, his own breathing becoming more and more ragged. you can barely remember your own name as spencer thrusts into you, the pain and pleasure mixing into a beautiful cocktail.
you feel your fifth orgasm of the night building, a tear rolling down your cheek from the perfect intensity of it all. 'f- fuck, baby, you're so tight, fuck,' spencer whispers into your ear, and his movements grow more and more erratic.
when he finally falls over the edge, his cum shooting into your body, the sound he makes, the low whimper thru his ragged breaths, is enough to send you into an orgasm once again. spencer stills inside of you, catching his breath as he hangs above.
he looks at your face, the mascara stains and his boxers in your mouth and can't help but smile. 'so gorgeous,' he says before pulling the fabric from your mouth and placing a kiss on your lips.
'thank you, doctor, you don't look too bad yourself,' you say, running your hand thru his beautifully messy locks.
'maybe i should tease you more often, if five orgasms is what i get out of it,' you say with a smirk as spencer gets dressed again, ready to go back to his own room.
he looks over his shoulder back at you. 'try that at your own risk, princess, i won't be this nice to you every time.'
#cm#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#dr spencer reid#spencer reid#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x reader#reid#smut#spencer reid smut#dr reid#doctor spencer reid#doctor reid#reid smut#spencer reid x reader smut#spencer reid x you#reid x reader
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My new boyfriend.
Tommy was Olivia's bff, he was always there for her above all things, they considered themselves almost "sisters" since tommy was not a guy like the others, he was a Twink, brown hair, youthful face, 20 years old, very thin, just like a noodle and clearly homosexual.
Olivia was the typical dumb blonde girl, tall, busty, the same age as tommy and popular but despite all this she always had things going wrong in love, she had recently met a fraternity guy named "Jake" But as expected, their relationship didn't last long and they had broken up a few hours ago, so she sent Tommy a message, so he could comfort her like he always does.
"Sis... I have ended my relationship with Jake, I am devastated... He was the most handsome guy in the world, I can't believe it"
"bestie, why do your relationships always take so little time? I mean, you've dated really hot guys... Hehe, I don't understand why they break up with you, you're beautiful, sis"
"I don't know, Tommy.... I would love to have a boyfriend who actually loves me for a long time, who protects me, listens to me and all that stuff, like you do."
"It's a shame I like guys, bff, because if I didn't, you know I'd be with you, but don't worry, you'll get a nice handsome guy with an attitude like mine!"
"I hope it doesn't take too long for that guy to come into my life, hey baddie, thanks for listening to me <3, now I have to go to sleep, sweet dreams! xoxo"
After that last message, olivia went straight to her computer and looked for something on the black market that could help her with her plan, and that's how he found a pair of red shorts, a chain and some earrings, In the description it said that with those things the guy who will use them would become the most handsome and loving guy in the world, so olivia did not hesitate twice and clicked to buy it.
The next day, the package arrived at her house, but I didn't want it to be so obvious, so I took the things out of the box where they were and handed them another one with a wrapper full of teddy bears and hearts, olivia knew that Tommy, seeing this, would not hesitate to open it, so once she closed the box, she sent it to Tommy's house.
A few minutes had passed since Olivia had sent the box to Tommy's house, When the package arrived someone knocked on the door and left, Tommy went directly to the door and opened it, curious to see the package he picked it up from the floor and began to open it, Tommy, seeing what was inside the box, was surprised. He never ordered clothes online, maybe they went to the wrong house, so he closed the box again, waiting for the real owner to claim it.
Once he left the box on the table, he went straight to the shower, when he finished his shower he grabbed his shirt but something was missing... And that was his special pink shorts, he remembered that he had lent them to his best friend so he thought of a solution, so he remembered that in the package they had sent him there were some red shorts so he went for them, once he used them, he would wash them so that the real owner would not suspect.
He grabbed the red shorts and put them on, It was a beautiful warm and sunny day so he decided to watch some TV, while watching TV he started to feel strange and a little hot, Something in his mind told him no try on what was in the box, the chain and the earrings, so he went for them and put them on, once je had them on he went to a mirror and saw himself, he laughed because he looked like one of her friend's boyfriends, but thin and without any muscle. After he saw herself in the mirror, he returned to the couch to continue watching TV.
And without realizing it, his foot began to enlarge as it became fleshier, his toes lengthened as veins sprouted and some hair grew on them, now he had feet of size 15, large masculine, all their delicacy was gone, now they looked like the feet of an jock.
His legs began to hurt, because they began to thicken and muscle began to come out, now his thighs were big while his calves were worthy of a real man, some hair began to grow on them.
The next thing to change was his butt and his bag, His big butt began to shrink to a decent size worthy of an jock, it was big but not as big as before although it was defined a little more, her pouch, which she was proud of since it was small and delicate, began to grow to a size 15 and also thickened while pubic hair came out, it seemed that she never shaved, but that made him look more masculine.
His designer thong also began to undergo changes, it went from being a red thong to becoming blue designer boxers so that his manhood would be highlighted even more along with his toned butt.
His stomach, which was thin, began to hurt as abdominal after abdominal came out in Tommy's stomach, a v began to be marked on the lateral sides while he gained a beautiful pack of 8 very worked abs, his chest began to expand outwards as two large defined pecs bulged out, a tattoo began to appear on a pectoral, his torso began to lengthen as he became more masculine, his back also underwent changes, it went from being feminine and thin, to being masculine and wide, muscle also appeared there, giving him a very manly back and worthy of admiration.
hiss shirt began to tear due to his large muscles, that was where Tommy reacted and was surprised and ran towards the mirror.
"Omg! What happened to me? I am dreaming? "This must be a dream, yes... I must wake up."
But before Tommy slapped himself, his arms began to hurt as they began to stretch and muscle began to come out, his biceps were now the size of a ball, his triceps were well worked, his delicate hands began to thicken while his fingers lengthened can and they started to look calloused due to all the exercise he did at the gym, wait... Exercise? Gym? He didn't exerc- but before Tommy reacted, two tattoos began to appear on his two muscular arms and another tattoo on one of his biceps.
Tommy couldn't anymore, he was about to cry, so he got the idea to call Olivia, but before he could do that, his face started to hurt.
Tommy's face, which was young, delicate and feminine, began to change as his jaw became marked, giving him a more manly appearance, His lips that were too full from being an expert cocksucker became thinner but still looked kissable, his nose became big and cuter, his eyes that were green began to turn brown, his beautiful blonde hair began to recede as it began to turn black, at the end, his hair ended up with a cut that any jock could have, his face had become the most beautiful, any girl who saw him would die to be with him, Tommy looked in the mirror again, looking at his new appearance, he became somewhat horny, without a doubt his new appearance was his ideal type, all the blood flowed into his bag giving him an obvious erection.
Tommy put his hand in his bag and started moving his hand up and down. He started to think about how many cute guys he could fuck... But as he thought about guys his erection faded, His mind began to give him new memories as a new alpha aura took over him. He began to imagine himself fucking girls with big butts and tits. His erection returned, but Tommy knew this wasn't right... He was... Homo... Homosexual?, NO, he was straight and loved raising beautiful girls with his bag, As he continued to raise and lower his hand he couldn't hold back anymore and he came and with that all his memories, personality and Tommy faded away.
"Seriously, Olivia is lucky to have me as a boyfriend, I mean, who wouldn't want someone like me?" Max said to himself as he flexed one of his arms in the mirror.
Tommy was now Max, Olivia's boyfriend, quarterback of the football team, leader of his fraternity, he loved parties, alcohol, exercising and having fun, max hated homosexuals, he said they could never be real men like him and his "bros."
After pulling up his pants he received a message from his girlfriend Olivia, Olivia knew that Tommy at this point had ceased to exist so she wanted to test out her new boyfriend.
"Hi love! I miss you... I would like to have you here with me, I want you to make me yours... come to my house <3"
"Well, today I'm free princess, to hell with today's training, I prefer to be with my beautiful girl, so you don't miss me so much while i arrived at your house, I'll send you a photo of me, princess ;)"
Olivia was happy with her new boyfriend, he was affectionate and listened to her all day, just like she wanted.
#gay to straight#male tf#personality change#reality change#jock tf#male transformation#frat bro#twink to jock#frat boy tf
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hi baby!! dont worry!! it was about reader getting so stressed and annoyed while building a gingerbread house that they throw it in the garbage because its going all wrong and carmy finds it hilarious lol then he builds one for her hehe<3 love u
Perfectionist.
Your boyfriend being a professional chef has its perks - especially when it comes to gingerbread houses.
pairing - carmen berzatto x female reader warnings - cursing word count - under 1k!! short and sweet author's note - just a little dose of carmy at christmas for you. thanks baby angel for sending this request in (twice!!) <3
masterlist. inbox.
"Fuck this."
Carmy hears your raised voice and immediately comes running, coming to a halt in the doorway of the kitchen.
"You good, baby?"
"No."
The frown on your face is amusing him to no end, fighting to keep his smile from breaking out. He doesn't want to minimise your feelings, but you're cutest when you're mad.
Carmy takes in the scene in front of him, surveying carefully. There's chunks of gingerbread scattered across the table, icing dripping from the tablecloth. Your kitchen looks like a candy store exploded - sweets in red, green and blue littered over every surface. You're caked in frosting, hair falling into your eyes as you take deep breaths to try to keep your anger at bay.
"I knew this wouldn't be easy, but fuck me, Carmy... I'm on the brink of a breakdown here."
He makes his way over, grinning like an idiot. It's not often he gets to help you with things - you're fiercely independent, determined to get stuff done all by yourself. He likes teaching you, getting to feel like he's easing your worries a little.
"You want my help?"
"I said I'd do it," you huff, on the verge of stamping your feet and pushing the table over.
"It won't kill you to ask for what you need, baby."
You roll your eyes, bottom lip caught between your teeth. It's difficult for you to admit defeat, but you might rip your hair out if your gingerbread collapses one more time.
"Can you help me, Carm?" you whisper.
"What was that, honey? Say it again?"
You sigh in exasperation, slumping back into your chair.
"Can you help me, Carmen? Please?"
He beams at you like the cat that got the cream, making his way over to sit next to you at the table.
"Lets start again, hmm?"
"Good idea."
You pick up the remnants of your gingerbread house and throw them so forcefully, the trash can almost tips over. Carmy laughs, wrapping his arms around you from behind.
"I think we've finally found the one thing you're not good at, honey. It's a Christmas miracle."
You can't help but chuckle, leaning your head back to rest against his shoulder. He presses a kiss or four into your neck, nosing at the spot under your ear.
"Okay, Mr Michelin Star. Show me what you got."
You bake, first, Carmy explaining how to get the perfect texture you need for structural soundness. He even gets out a ruler, measuring the rolled out dough so the sides will be even.
He kisses you lazily while your gingerbread is in the oven. You're propped up on the counter as he stands between your legs, arms thrown around his shoulders. He tastes like cinnamon and spice, groaning when you lick the sugar straight from his tongue.
When it's cooled, you begin your assembly, sitting back while Carmy trims and remeasures. He draws out a template with a pencil and cuts accordingly, ensuring each piece has a straight edge. You watch in awe as he works, so careful, so attentive. You're fighting not to jump his bones at any given moment.
It's time to build, and Carmy has the perfect plan. He's made a thickened sugar syrup that acts as a glue, hardening when it dries and keeping everything together. His tongue darts out to wet his lips as he concentrates, determined not to mess this up for you.
He steps back, then, to let you decorate. You clearly have a vision, your picturesque idea of what you wanted your original creation to look like. Carmy makes you multiple bags of icing in different colours, and melts down candies so you can make windows and doors. He opens packets of chocolates, and carves into them with a knife to make little trees for the yard.
Hours later, when you're both covered in powdered sugar and melted chocolate, you step back to admire your masterpiece.
"Holy shit, Carm."
"We did good, huh?"
"Is there like, a business in this? Can we do this for a living?"
He laughs, the sound vibrating through you from where his chest his pressed to your back. He's got you tightly in his arms, swaying gently to the soft music that plays from the radio.
"What were you saying about finding the one thing I wasn't good at, Berzatto? Hmm?"
He spins you, pressing his forehead into yours.
"I take it back. I take it all back, baby. You're good at everything."
"Especially gingerbread houses."
"Especially gingerbread houses."
You lean up to kiss him, wiping some frosting off his cheek with your thumb.
"Thanks for not making me feel like an idiot."
"I would never. Life is a learning curve, baby, You taught me that."
"I love you," you whisper. "And just so you know, we're never eating that. It's going to have to be display only."
He laughs, full chested and whole hearted, moving his hands to cradle your face.
"I love you too, baker extraordinaire. We don't need to eat it, anyway. We've got all this candy to get through."
You reach behind him to pick up a chocolate, tossing it into your mouth.
"It isn't as sweet as you," you wink.
A blush rises up his cheeks as he rolls his eyes, pulling you in closer.
"Merry Christmas, baby."
"Merry Christmas, Carmen."
#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen berzatto fic#carmen berzatto fluff#carmen berzatto x reader fluff#carmen berzatto x you#carmen berzatto#carmen berzatto x y/n#carmen berzatto smut#carmen berzatto x female reader#carmen berzatto x reader smut#carmy x reader#carmy berzatto#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto imagine#carmen berzatto imagine#carmy berzatto smut#carmy berzatto x reader fluff#carmy berzatto fluff#the bear x reader#the bear x you#the bear fluff#the bear imagine#the bear fic#the bear x y/n
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I thought I was done being feral about Tamagotchis but no, it was just a lull
#I was already interested in getting a Gotchi for the past couple months and then KKClue dropped that video (praise be)#And Then I learned that there was a cheap way of purchasing legit Japanese Gotchis?? I may uh. Have. Purchased a few#I never really had That Moment as a kid or teen of being impulsive with money - I'd either save it up and get one big thing#Or I'd buy little things until I eventually ran out - and that habit has kinda continued into adulthood lol#Nowadays the one big thing is usually something like a new computer when my old one dies but it certainly is a big thing lol#And I like getting little things like my puzzle cubes <3 But I'm fairly miserly!#Well. Until.#I've finally hit The Phase of impulsive purchases because of a perfect storm of Things Happening lol#I first wrote down that I wanted to start looking for Tamagotchis in March of this year and I was going about it rather casually to start#Just looking around Big Box stores to check pricing - then various toy and vintage stores to see if they had stock#Most of them didn't but I did get in some delightful networking :D I want to go back and continue!#I finally broke down a week ago and checked Amazon for the ''custom'' shell designs because I like the galaxy one hehe#And then - that accursed video (affectionate)#I may have watched it five times so far lol and then actually bit the bullet and checked out the sponsor and Fucking Hell#I can never get into gambling this does absolutely wack shit to my brain it's only half about the Gotchis themselves anymore#That said I am very excited for my Mesutchi to arrive! I really want to get an Osutchi to go with her and a Gen 1 and and and#I want to collect all the Angelgotchs so bad you don't understand I Must Have them in all the colours it's very important#I'm even considering doing some kind of Project with them once they arrive I don't know it's just all so exciting#I'm feeling very normal#Oh yeah and barely related other than IRL silliness - I finally got a haircut! :D#It'll take a bit for my sona to update but it was today! All sorts of things haha
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Chapter 13 - I-T-G-I-R-L, You Know I am That Girl
So this chapter is a little different. As well all know, the reader is an ICON and no one is near her level and she will do some iconic things in 2024
Look out for the dates to see how the time line goes (its a bit all over the place so I apologize but this will end with the start of the F1 Season with her clip in the Formula One Intro for every race and some other little things.)
And I know most of the pictures I used were Max but we play pretend here :D
Like always comments, questions, concerns, reblogs, and likes are always appreciated <3
TAG LIST IS OPEN
February 20, 2024
acrosstheline.podcast we are so privileged to have sat down with y/n.89 for this all exclusive interview where we discussed her opening races, femininity in male-dominant sports, and what it takes to be a racer - read now in our special edition
liked by y/n.89, landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 751,836 others
lilymhe is this what you've been working on! so so proud of you
y/n.89 hehe it is! and love you too - tell Alex that I'm taking you alex_albon I'm right here y/n.89 and? lilymhe gagged him
y/n_updates OH MY GOSH OUR GIRL'S FIRST MAGAZINE
y/n_lover and hopefully not the last! y/n.89 definitely not y/n_updates SHE RESPONDED?!
change_ur_f-car the questions were top notch! good to see interviewers who aren't looking to poke and prod for a reaction
y/n.nation favorite quote - "I never thought I'd podium on my first race - let alone finish it in the points. I hope that this means that this season will be good. I've always said that I was born to break records - and I'm glad to see that I wasn't lying."
formula1fanatic this was beautifully written, I was skeptical about her joining - but now I have no doubts. she truly belongs in the car to win
May 15, 2024
duke Y/n L/n has taken the Motor Sport World - and everyone else - by storm. we had the opportunity to sit down with the rookie and discuss the inside feelings that might take over during the pressures of her first year. these are the unfiltered thoughts of y/n l/n.
liked by charles_leclerc, formula1, and 284,937 others
y/n-lover MOMMY, sorry, MOTHER, sorry, MOMMY
maxiel_obsessed glad you put my thoughts into words
y/n'soneandonly can arthur_leclerc fight? post up frenchman
charles_leclerc he's MONEGASQUE
girls4girls this is the moment I became a fan
89_all-the_way "I looked around one time and really thought about how I was the only female racer. I was waiting for the doubts to creep in but instead pride found its way into my soul. I made it and no one can stop me" WHAT AN ICON
box-box literally one of my favorite moments number1y/n-fan I love her so much
maxverstappen1 where is your shirt young lady?
y/n.89 its called fashion - something you haven't heard of mr. I only wear RedBull merchant lewishamilton glad to see you went with my outfit suggestion georgerussell33 what was wrong with my suggestion!? y/n.89 I was not about to wear a Tommy Hilfiger jumpsuit
francisca.gomez loml - so proud of you girly
y/n.89 thanks kika! tell pear I want you back
pitstopfailure BARK BARK BARK BARK
October 7, 2024
voguemagazine "I think that I was born for this. there's nothing else I'd rather be doing than getting in my car every weekend and putting my life on the line for the sport I love," says Y/n L/n. Her days are directed by high speeds, training, and breaking records.
liked by kellypiquet, lewishamilton, and 820, 184 others
redbullracing that's our rookie!!
emotionalsupport-rivals and everyone liked that bullsrunred they are everything to me your honor
verstappensfam first kelly, then y/n! now max just needs a vogue addition
y/n.89 oh I'm working on it!
y/n-on-top they hit us with that "no one is on her level. they may be close, but we haven't seen talent like this since Lewis Hamilton's rookie year. even then, it feels different - she's different."
iamred-iamyellow and then they follow up with "her poise and composure are unmatched. she wins and maturely celebrates, she doesn't too well in the race - she takes it to heart and fixes it. she is everything a formula 1 driver aspires to be."
y/n.89 BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER!!!!!!
oscarpias-tree the way her birthday is right in the middle of Max's and Arthur's birthdays y/nxarthur exactly 7 days after max's and 7 days before Arthur's
December 4, 2023
time Y/n L/n (y/n.89) is TIME's 2024 Woman of the Year.
In her freshman season of Formula 1, L/n talks about her phenomenal rookie year, carving her spot into the sport, and the up's and down's of the expectations that were on her shoulders.
liked by taylorswift, zendaya, and 926,824 others
y/n-lover LETS GO!!!!!!!
maxverstappen1 so so proud
taylorswift congratulations y/n.89! you deserve this and everything!
y/n.nation that's our girl right there - woman of the YEAR
y/n.89 why is everyone tagging me in this post??
landonorris uh, did you even look at it??? oscarpiastri you were announced woman of the year? y/n.89 oh. boxbox_nightmare where'd she go logansargeant oh she's screaming right now - I can hear her though the walls y/n.89 LOGAN
y/n_updates everything about this article changed the way I think about life
lestappenlove this is my Roman Empire
December 20, 2024
motorsportsproduction The "Minds of Champions" special issue is out now!
We thank sebastianvettel, maxverstappen1, and y/n.89 for sitting down with us for this exclusive. Inside you will find separate as well as joint interviews from the drivers.
liked by arthur_leclerc, danielricciardo, and 2,947,935 others
lastlaplando the way they had not only y/n and max but SEBASTIAN VETTLE TOO
vettelsvetos this is everything to me, I know y/n isn't a champion yet but the way she talks and acts - she's truly champion material
emotionalsupport-rivals max, y/n, and Sebastian are the perfect trio, I could see them win a Le Mans race one day
box_box oh my gosh yes - they'd be the perfect line-up
redbullracing our three generations: past, present, and future
sebastianvettel thank you for having me - it was a special time
y/n.89 it was so good to see you again seb! planning my Switzerland trip as we speak maxverstappen1 am I invited? charles_leclerc Sebastian's favorites ONLY maxverstappen1 then why are you still here? y/n.89 shots fired (you're all wrong - I'm the favorite) landonorris popcorn is out and the girls are fighting
landonorris sad I wasn't invited for this interview
motorsportsproductions next time mr. Norris, next time
y/n.nation half of these interviews made me cry
y/ndoesiconicshit so, y/n dyed her hair navy and red just for a RedBull commercial? she is COMMITTED - sad that she eventually got back to her blond hair
liked by lastlaplando, maxiel-lover, and 170 others
y/n.nation sorry to tell you but these were wigs, y/n mentioned it once in an interview :(
y/ndoesiconicshit NOOOOOOOOOOO y/n-on-top her hair would have been crispy af if she actually dyed it
formula1fan when I tell you I switched teams because of this commercial
y/ndoesiconicshit y/n put out bts pictures of her first photoshoot and lemme tell you - I am in LOVE
liked by y/n.nation, pitstopfailure, and 239 others
f1-today this photoshoot was everything to me
y/n-loves-me people better be glad that y/n chose to be a driver and not a model
formula_uno the way that half the drivers could be models if they quit their day jobs
y/n_updates those pictures are on my wall
y/ndoesiconicshit apparently y/n wasn't ready when Max came to pick her up before media day - so she got ready in the car (what a queen)
liked by y/n-lover, y/n_fan, and 361 others
piastri_81 the way she's so unbothered, in her vlog from that day she sounded so chill while max was freaking out about being late
icon-y/n I quote "max what would they do? fire us? yagirl89 the follow up "YES" and then the "oh" had me dying
lastlaplando her skin is flawless - she needs to drop that skincare routine asap
y/ndoesiconicshit y/n's birthday was wild - y/n hinted at what happened but nothing was confirmed. all we know is that the wags took her out to celebrate the night of and they all went radio-silent (max and Arthur were panicking)
liked by change_ur_f-car, formula1fanatic, and 613 others
f1_wags apparently they went to a club where phones weren't allowed for privacy reasons
y/ns_oneandonly the leaked videos tho were hilarious
y/n-and-wags but the outside videos of Arthur and Max coming to get her melted my heart
maxiel-lover i NEED the details like water - y/n better drop them
y/ndoesiconicshit y/n at the premier of the Formula 1 film "Can't Catch Me" starring Tom Holland - when she stepped out on the red carpet ALL cameras went to her, like no one else was photographed during this time
liked by y/n.89, arthurxy/n, and 729 others
tomholland-fan DID ANYONE NOTICE Y/NS CAMEO THO
y/n.nation I thought that woman looked familiar! y/n.89-love where was she! I'll go back and watch it just to find her tomholland-fan it was when Tom's character needed to go to the mechanics for his Honda - she was the one he talked to and she was also at the end race as a engineer as well!
RedBull.nation the way everyone held their breaths when she stepped out of the car, the only sound was the clicks of the cameras and then the crowd just erupted in a roar to get her attention
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Start of the actual chapter!
Your sunglasses sat perched on your nose as you sat in the back seat of whatever rental you were in for the day. Your fingers swiped the screen of your iPhone, constantly switching videos before they could even finish. Vito sat next to you, looking out the window as he talked to someone on the phone. Words about contracts, signings, photoshoots, and interviews rattled around in the car. The driver turned the wheel as he pulled up to the studio. The car lurched as it came to a stop.
Vito quickly hung up on the phone with a short goodbye. You turned off your phone before you stepped out of the car.
“What was that all about?” you asked as he guided you to the front of the building.
You heard the click of his phone as he locked it and opened the door. You said a quick thank you as you were blasted with the air conditioning.
“Just some calls I had to make. Lots of people are wanting to interview you kid. I have to make sure that they’re not just using you or plan to ask you stupid questions.” His fingers flew over the screen, probably typing yet another email.
You just nodded. Vito had taken care of you for so long, he’d take care of you now. You knew how dangerous the media was, especially as a woman in your occupation.
The two of you followed a long hallway down to a big room where cameras and other filming equipment were set up. Right now, Max was in the middle in his racing suit working on poses. Since he was the 2023 champion, you guessed he’d be doing what he did last year and the year before. But you’ll have people know you tried to convince him to do an actual pose, but he was resilient against your puppy eyes.
You however had no clue what pose you were going to do. So, you were really hoping that someone would be able to assist you.
Max quickly glanced at you and shot you a smile before being directed to pay attention. His smile melted and his stone-cold façade showed up. You wanted to shiver since you knew that Max was this big softy that had been broken down by the villainous persona that had been built by cut scenes and misplaced wording. You’d rather go back in time to tell little Max that he wasn’t the big monster everyone said he was than win a world championship. But because time travel hasn’t been confirmed – yet, you’d stick with helping present Max and work toward your own championship.
You were ushered to a small changing room where your new race suit was hung up. Your fireproofs were neatly folded and were lying on the small bench. The shoes sat next to them. This year, the suits were a bit different. Max and you had voiced how much you liked the matte gold and navy look. Yes, the navy and red were the big staple colors of Red Bull, but you could do well with a little pizzaz.
So the design team listened and made the red a sub color. The lettering and stripes down the sides were gold. The bulls on the main logos were gold as well. Red lined the seams as well as being the main color for all the sponsorship logos.
The one thing that Max was happy about was that the hats stayed the same. He had too many from the year before to not be able to wear them. You didn’t see the appeal as you were more prone to hat hair than he was.
You put on the all navy fire proofs before stepping into the thicker race suit. You kept the outer layer on your hips as you sat down on the bench to lace your shoes. Standing up, you noticed a mirror. You walked over and just took a moment to look at yourself.
Possibly for once in your life, you liked the way you looked. The once dark circles under your eyes had finally gone away with some good sleep. Your hair looked more shiny and healthy and you had put on some good weight in the form of muscles that were needed to steer the car. Your trainer had put you through vigorous training, but it was all to help you prepare.
A knock on the door let you know that they were ready for you. Vito stood to the side with your 2024 helmet. You were known for switching your helmet almost every other race in Formula 2. Your argument was that you just had too many good ideas not to use them. To keep it simple, you went with a full navy helmet with gold logos to match the suits.
Some of the Red Bull team had mentioned that your helmet looked similar to Sebastian Vettel’s helmet. You only shot them a sly smile, basically telling them everything they needed to know. And it’s not like you didn’t know the German racer, quite the contrary. And did he give you his blessing to take inspiration from his glory days at Red Bull? The probability was huge.
But again, people really didn’t need to know that either.
All you knew was that the helmet matched to a tee, and it would be lucky to be used for more than 10 races. You had a list where you’d use special helmets. Vito was already on it with getting them ordered. You didn’t pay him to not order multiple custom helmets per year. He was already used to your antics.
You shook hands with multiple people before walking over to Max. You took your place next to him.
“So what’s the plan. I go left, you go right, and we leave with a giant explosion behind us? Taylor Swift Bad Blood style?”
Max wheezed through his nose, not expecting your full-proof plan.
From behind, Vito spoke up, “There will be no explosions. Here’s the plan. The producers talked to me and they actually want Y/n’s segment to go last as like a ‘surprise’.”
You interrupted him, “But people already know I’m driving.”
Vito sighed before continuing. “I know. It doesn’t make sense but they’re the bosses for today. So they want Max to hold your helmet, turn to the left and hand it off screen. Then the camera would cut to you ‘taking it,’ you’d look down, and then put it on.”
Your hands flew up. “So I don’t get to do the pose I rehearsed and Max doesn’t get to continue to look dead inside?”
Max looked at you and squinted. “You didn’t have a pose ready. You were just texting me and panicking that you didn’t have one.”
You only pouted after his confession.
Max went ahead and redid his segment. This time, he did manage to do a little smile, just because you were the one taking the helmet and you made a weird face at him.
The film techs said that the last take with the smile was the best one. And to Max’s chagrin, it would be the one to be used in the official video.
You were told to stand on the massive X in the middle of the background. You were looking around at all the lights as someone helped you fix your hair. You hadn’t done anything pretty with it because it wasn’t realistic. You had never curled your hair and done anything special with it on race day. People would always find your hair in a braid, bun, or a Founding Father’s ponytail. And today was no different.
You took a bit of time to actually make a nice braid that sat on your shoulder. Made you feel a bit like Katniss Everdeen.
Speaking of, you wanted to have a little bit of fun. Your nickname wasn’t Kid for a reason.
“And action.”
Your hand scrunched into three fingers that rose to your mouth for a kiss and then was lifted above your head.
“I volunteer as tribute!”
A couple of giggles filled the studio. Max and Vito were trying their best not to laugh out loud too much behind the camera.
“Cut! Let’s try it again!”
Your segment took about three more tries to get correctly. One of them, you accidentally dropped your helmet. Another, the helmet wouldn’t go on properly with your braid on your shoulder so you had to move it and undo it, so that you didn’t look like you didn’t have hair – the ponytail worked better. And then the third take was perfect.
Max had been the one to hand you the helmet off screen and you did the opposite that he had done. You started off with a small smile, before going cold faced when you put the helmet on. You tried not to giggle once the thing was one since it felt weird without the balaclava. But you managed to keep your shoulders still until the man yelled Cut once more.
You, thankfully, were allowed to now go change out of the hot suit. A Red Bull manager was the one to take the suit from you and hold on to it until preseason testing, which was going to be in a few weeks. You knew that when you said goodbye to Max as the place, it wouldn’t be too long until you would see him again.
Wasn’t like you were ten minutes away, or that you didn’t work together, or that you somehow had the same simulator testing times just to catch up on what you missed during the week. But during the last few weeks, you spent more time with Arthur.
He had called you in tears once he finally got confirmation that he was going to be out of Formula 2 and then cried once more when he had to leave the Ferrari Academy program. Your heart just ached and ached for him when you held him.
You remember when he finally opened up a few nights after.
You were bundled up in a giant blanket. He had come over to your apartment since Charles was staying with their mom for a few days while his apartment was being remodeled. Arthur’s head was tucked in your neck as a random movie played on the screen.
He had finally spoken up.
“You know. I really knew from the moment that I couldn’t continue karting all those years ago that racing just wasn’t for me. It never was.”
You looked down at his face that was stained with tears. “Thur, don’t say that.”
He only shrugged. “It’s true. If it wasn’t maybe Papa would have chosen for me to continue racing. And I know I begged Charles to be selfish, but maybe now I’m wishing I hadn’t.”
Your hands grabbed his face and made him look up at you.
“Please don’t say that. Please.”
By now, you had your own tears staining your face.
“Because if you weren’t in Formula 2 this year, I would have never met you.” You took a breath. “My best friend wouldn’t be my best friend without it.”
His eyes closed as he nodded little nods, almost as if he was having a hard time excepting what you called the truth.
“I just feel like I don’t have a purpose anymore. You and Charles have racing, Maman has her store, and Lorenzo has the business. I have nothing.”
Your arms wrapped around his figure. “We’ll find something and figure it out together. If anything, you can follow me to all my races.” You had a shit-eating grin on your face. A small laugh escaped his lips and you took that as a win.
“What, and be your WAG?”
You elbowed the Monegasque. “Sure. That’s exactly what I’m going for. I think I’ll have separation anxiety without you.”
“Then that’s what I’ll do. Or unless I find something else.”
“That’s all I ask. For you not to give up Thur. We’re in this new world together.”
Arthur, feeling bold, laced his hands with yours. You were thankful for the dark room so he couldn’t see your red cheeks.
“Together.”
And together is what you did for the remaining weeks. You and Arthur scoured every possibility he had to get back into racing. You reached out to many people – people who knew your godfather well and had helped you back with karting. You also reached out to many other people who normal fans didn’t know you knew.
On this list, which Arthur had a hard time believing, were people like Sebastian Vettel, Kimi Räikkönen, Jensen Button, and Nico Rosberg.
Arthur had tried to persuade you to not go to all your famous connections, but you were on a mission. He even threatened you that he wouldn’t take any offer since he didn’t want you to feel like he was using you. You only threatened him back when you told him that you wanted to do this and didn’t mid at you. You believe that you scared him since he never questioned you again.
It was the day before preseason testing in Bahrain before you got an offer, or actually two, back. Arthur, keeping his promise to follow you until he found something, came with you. He was under the guise of being with his brother for support, but most knew that he was actually there for you.
The first one came from a face time call from four time champion Sebastian Vettel.
“Kind, it’s good to see you!” Sebastian’s voice echoed in your hotel room. Your laptop was on the desk. You sat on the second bed while Arthur sat in the rollie chair. Before, the two of you had argued about who got what seat. You sadly lost the game of rock-paper-scissors and was banished to the bed.
“It’s good to see you too Seb! How are your kids?”
A squeal could be heard from behind his office door. Sebastian smiled at the sound of his children.
“They’re doing just fine. How are you doing Arthur? I know that losing a seat is hard but I was delighted to hear from Y/n when she told me that you weren’t giving up racing entirely.”
You shot Arthur a knowing grin as to say “see, you still have a spot in this world with me.”
Arthur spoke up, “Ah, yes sir. I was a bit discouraged. But she somehow convinced me to not give up.”
Sebastian clapped his hands. “Well I do have an offer for you. However, it wouldn’t be for this year and maybe not the next. There will be a lot of preparation but I know you could handle it.”
Arthur shot him a shy smile. “I’m down for anything at this point.”
“Well, I have been in the talks about endurance racing. And as you know, I am getting a bit older, but I still want to be involved. So I need to come up with a team. I would either be a driver or the team leader, I have yet to decide. But that means I need to start creating a team.”
The young Monegasque took a moment to bring everything in. “So you’re asking me to be on your future team. Even after all the mistakes I made in Formula 2?”
The German winced. “You are just like your brother. A bit too self-deprecating but we can work on that. Like I told Charles, don’t waste it. Don’t waste your talents away by not trying. We will have to do months and months of training as to get over making mistakes, but that’s also part of life. We just need to learn from them. So what do you say?”
The rest of the facetime call was filled with tears, smiles, cheers, and talks of sending over contracts to go over. You and Arthur were over the moon.
He might not be racing in 2024 or even 2025, but he’d be doing something.
Now, the next two offers came during media day when you had testing. Nico Rosberg and Jensen Button had apparently been looking for the two of you the entire day. Thankfully, it was just media and Max was the one to drive the new livery around for everyone to see. You just got to sit back and relax, well, as much as you could when you weren’t discussing data.
Nico and Jensen both cornered you when they had the chance.
“Good to see you again Brittany.” You shot Nico a smirk when you exchanged greetings. Arthur, polite as ever, shook both men’s hands.
You smiled at the two older men. “Now to what do we owe this pleasure of this fine Tuesday?”
The two former drivers looked at each other before they casted their gaze at Arthur.
Jensen spoke first. “We just want to preface about how terrible we feel about you losing your Formula 2 seat. It was your rookie year and you had some pretty bad luck.”
Your eyes rolled. “Way to rub salt in the wound Button.”
He shot you a glare, but Nico spoke next. “However, we have a solution. Y/n here told us about your taken offer from Sebastian. And we know that there are going to be weekends that you won’t have anything to do. So to save you from quote on quote from Miss L/n here ‘separation anxiety from missing your best friend’ we are offering you a type of paid internship at Sky Sports.”
Jensen cut in, “Obviously you would be helping either Nico or I depending on what weekend, but you’d be interviewing, commentating, or taking videos of drivers throughout the race time.”
Arthur had sparkles in his eyes, but you knew they were probably tears. With this offer, he’d be closer to you and his brother. You knew he didn’t want to be alone somewhere while you two were living his old dream. Well, it could still be his dream, but he told you time and time again that it was easier to put the Formula 1 dream in the past so that he could move on.
That day was also filled with smiles and contract talks.
Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday were filled with you in the new RB20. If the fans thought last year was a rocket ship, this one had to be some type of vehicle from a Sci-Fi movie cause you think it was even faster.
But, the Ferraris and McLarens were very close behind. The end of the weekend determined that Red Bull was still on top as you were able to take the fastest time out of the whole weekend, while you and Max did the most laps.
You were practically vibrating in the debrief meeting from excitement. What this year would hold, you didn’t know.
But you couldn’t wait to get started.
y/n.89 has posted
y/n.89 it's go time
liked by arthur_leclerc, sebastialvettel, box_box_express, and 65,294 others
y/n.nation babygirl's new helmet - I'm in love!
sebastianvettel I see you're coming for my spot as Red Bull's golden child
maxverstappen1 sorry that was me, I have taken the seat y/n.89 sit down max, there's a new golden child
box_box_express middle picture is slaying
y/n-on-top I mean she did graduate from the university of servington with a degree in cuntology and slay sciences y/n.89 PERIOD
arthur_leclerc photo creds would be nice...
y/n.89 sorry ThurThur - EVERYONE ARTHUR TOOK THE MIDDLE PICTURE JUST LETTING YOU KNOW landonorris ok then.
redbullracing rookie of the year right there
y/n.89 I'm the only rookie? but thanks admin :D
iamred_iamyellow everyone was so close with only a few seconds separating the top three
ferrari'slastchamp this year is our year the-bulls sure - you all say that EVERY YEAR
f1 only six more days! see you drivers in the paddock
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