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If We Don't Stop Wanting in the Long Dark
Rating: E
Summary:
“Come on, they’re the perfect flower for you: they’ve got hell and bore in the name.” He then added to his insult by flicking the end of her nose with his soil-stained gardening gloves. She was sure that her nose was now speckled in dirt. And even though she had glared thoroughly at him, he had just laughed before saying, “Those specks of dirt should fit in nicely with the rest of your face, freckles.”
Her glare turned murderous; this new nickname he’s given her is a thousand percent done to infuriate her.
“Do not call me that,” she snapped, pawing furiously at the soil dotting her face.
His eyes were dark on her when he had arched an eyebrow and asked, “Oh? You’d prefer I call you Master?”
-
When Wednesday finds herself tethered to Tyler Galpin as his new Master after killing Laurel Gates, the two work together to try to find a way to undo the binding. But as the months go by, can they learn to trust not just each other but also their own feelings?
for @weylerwritingevents
#wylerspringfest2024#wyler#weyler#wyler fanfic#ao3 fic#wednesday addams#tyler galpin#it's long#i'm just warning you#and it's smutty#heed the “e” rating#heed the tags
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New fic! Apparently I'm celebrating 10 tgcf fics with err pain! I promise it's not as evil as it looks! Please heed the warnings!
Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 天官赐福 - 墨香铜臭 | Tiān Guān Cì Fú - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù, 天官赐福 | Heaven Official's Blessing (Cartoon) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: Hua Cheng/Xie Lian (Tian Guan Ci Fu) Characters: Xie Lian (Tian Guan Ci Fu), Hua Cheng (Tian Guan Ci Fu), Jun Wu (Tian Guan Ci Fu) Additional Tags: canon adjacent, Canon Related, Character Death, Stabbing, Choking, Spoilers, Mentioned Feng Xin (Tian Guan Ci Fu), Mentioned Mu Qing (Tian Guan Ci Fu), Mentioned Pei Ming (Tian Guan Ci Fu), Control, Plot Twists, Angst, Heavy Angst, Cursed Shackles (Tian Guan Ci Fu), Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mild Gore, Blood and Gore, Xie Lian snaps, Murder, Death, Ambiguous/Open Ending Summary:
Jun Wu decides he has had enough of sharing the world with the Ghost realm, and seeks to destroy Hua Cheng
With the Heavenly Officials under his tight control, Hua Cheng is surprisingly easy to capture and subdue
All Jun Wu needs now is Hua Cheng's ashes, which he finds around a very docile Xie Lian's neck...
[Spoilers for - Hua Cheng's previous identities, Xie Lian's life after the fall of Xianle, Jun Wu's err "meddling" - more detail in fic!]
#tgcf#tgcf fanfic#heaven official's blessing#heaven official's blessing fanfic#cw character death#cw stabbing#xie lian#hua cheng#san lang#jun wu#hualian#angst#xie lian x hua cheng#e rated#complete fic#read on ao3#heed the fic tags#spoilers#darke faerie fics
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For @its-just-a-glitch who asked for 3(E):
Congrats friend, you landed on the Pink Suit Filth (heed the rating, I am so serious.)
EXCERPT: but you're gonna need some help (outta those) (Spiderverse, Hobie/Miles, Rated E, Post-Canon)
They're halfway up a wall, sticking, letting gravity do some of the work, when Miles makes the most punched-out noise Hobie's ever heard and throws down a web that tethers them to the floor below. It drags Miles' weight impossibly closer, by centimetres that feel like kilometres around his prick; Hobie's head falls back like his neck's clean broken. When he remembers how to breathe again, he laughs shakily, grinding up and up and in. Miles' open mouth ticks up at the corners. He's using the one arm he's managed to free from the sweater to leverage himself into it, his chest and belly heaving, cock stiff and drooling all over the both of them. The way he groans, long and low-
Hobie yanks at the sweater's high collar with his teeth, nuzzlng past the fabric until he can get at Miles' neck. The skin underneath is over-warm and tacky with sweat, and now with his own shaking breaths; Hobie does his very best to worsen the situation with the lathe of his tongue, with the slide of his teeth, with long pulls of his mouth that make Miles arch awkwardly and interrupt his rhythm.
'Fuck,' he gasps, and Hobie has to bite him, just a little bit. 'A-ah!'
'I got you,' he says, nosing his way toward Miles' temple, trying for soothing and probably just sounding ruined. He gets a hand into the scant space between them, where Miles' dick is so wet he has to snag it on the skin between his thumb and his index finger before he can get a decent grip on it. Hobie pants a bit when Miles rolls his hips back and forward and back again, like it's almost too much for him. He's whining, a little; he always makes the sweetest noises when he's getting his cock touched, it makes Hobie want to choke on it.
It’s so good inside of him, though. It might be everything.
Licking his way into Miles' mouth feels like closing a circuit; like trapping the heat in so it has nowhere to go. Miles huffs against him, breathing through his nose, jerking when Hobie fucks him slow and hard enough that they both shake with it. His web is the only reason they're not inching higher up the wall. Hobie can feel his brow furrowing, his jaw going lax as the sweet ache in his gut gets sweeter. Someone - he's not sure which, of the two of them - makes a pleading noise that gets swallowed up when Hobie redoubles his efforts to drub them into one. He curves his spine until there's friction everywhere between them, every time they move, thumbing drunkenly through the precome leaking from the wet, swollen head of Miles' cock with the hand trapped between them.
He's on the back end of a thrust, dragging his prick out the scant few inches he can stand when Miles' leg jerks. Hobie squeezes his eyes open as Miles locks up in his arms, but he can only just see his face because Miles is arching forward - shoulders curling, stomach tensing up, eyebrows furrowed with the feeling as he keens into Hobie’s open mouth. He comes messily between them, on the fingers wrapped around his cock, on his Suit, on the underside of Hobie’s chin. Hobie’s awareness narrows down to the scant few inches between it and their mouths, and he thinks about feeding it back to him.
It’s an inspiring thought. Miles is still twitching around him when the orgasm wrings an exultant noise out of Hobie’s chest. It’s slow and sticky-sweet, scouring; his hips jerk rabbit-quick in an attempt to chase the feeling. Miles grunts when he hits something that’s probably a bit too sensitive for such enthusiastic treatment at this point. He leans back to try to catch his breath but lets Hobie keep him close while he rides it out, mouthing at the pulse thrumming under Miles' jaw and rocking into him with shallow thrusts. The wet sound of it makes him bite his lip, as gravity’s effect takes hold.
[TBC]
#fanfic#spiderverse#punkflower#again: heed the rating#hm okay so you wanted sth rated e i believe (just fukcign. punts you in at the deep end)#asks and things#10th anniversary suit#🎸🌻
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Hail Hydra - Chapter Five "You Can Chain Me, You Can Torture Me, You Can Even Destroy This Body, But You Will Never Imprison My Mind."
The torture turns violent, and Bucky struggles to cope. CW: Stab wound, shock collar, humiliation, forced nudity. Prompts filled: ‘Jugular, December 5th prompt, Dead Dove December ‘Dead’, December 5th Prompt, Hurtcember 2023 ‘Impaled’, December 5th prompt, Whumpcember ‘Got to Do What You Got to Do to Survive’, Winter Wonderland Bingo (2) ‘Humiliation’, Fandom-Free Bingo (Frosty Edition)
Check it out on AO3 here, or below the KR with the boards!
The heat sapped my strength and resistance far quicker than the cold ever did. It took a matter of hours for the dizziness and dehydration to have me slumped over, sweat pouring from my body in rivulets. The sun hadn’t yet begun to rise before the darkness closed in, finally unable to fight the weight pulling down my muscles.
I’m getting real sick of waking up to that face. Hands slapped my cheeks firmly, and I groaned weakly, lids flickering open reluctantly to find sharp green eyes staring at me through thick spectacles. “Ah – he wakes! Not dead yet, I see.” “Not yet,” I rasped, averting my gaze. “Despite your trying.” He smirked, tutting under his breath. “I suppose I will just have to keep trying, hm?” A needle sunk into my jugular, and I hissed through gritted teeth, resisting the urge to spit fury at him, his warnings from the morning still ringing loud in my ears. “What do you want from me?” I asked quietly, grimacing at the syringe of fluid being pushed into my neck. “I don’t know what the Germans did to me. I can’t tell you anything. Why not just let me go?” He tutted again – a patronising sound that set my teeth on edge, and I winced automatically. “We do not need your words, Американский. We need your body’s secrets.” With a sigh, he ran a fingertip over my sweat-sticky forehead, and I couldn’t help but sigh, his touch delightfully cool on my clammy skin. “But! First things are first. Do not let it be said we do not take care or you...” My restraints were removed, and I bolted upright, biting back a yowl as a sharp metal bar impaled my good shoulder at my haste. Another infuriating tut as the was buried in my flesh and muscle had me shaking fiercely with barely contained rage, but he only smiled sickeningly. “Will you never learn?” Bridling under his gaze, I snarled wordlessly, hand raising to wrap around the iron, intending to bury it between his eyes without hesitation- but my hand dropped in surprise as my body convulsed, torso dropping back to the table as spasms and writhes made my muscles contract, jaw clenched against my will. Each second felt like a lifetime as burning energy stirred my limbs without my consent, until I finally relaxed, shaking and panting. “... Shall we try this again, упрямый Американский? Sit.” I moved slowly, hesitantly upright, wincing at the pain in my shoulder, fingers curling instinctively as I fought to remove the rod submerged beside my collarbone. He smirked, leaning closer to yank to metal from my body, but I swallowed my grunt of pain as three inches of steel were dragged from me. “Better...” His fingers curled around the device at my throat, eliciting a pained wince as he dragged me to my feet, the skin beneath still sensitive from the shocks. “Now... Strip.” “I-I... What?” He smirked, leaning forward, a small control in his hand. “Don’t make me ask again, упрямый Американский.” Swallowing dryly, my fingers shook despite myself as I stood a little taller, meeting his eye, every bit as stubborn as he called me as I began to unbutton the heavy woollen jumpsuit still clinging to my body. I won’t let them humiliate me. I’ve got to do what I’ve got to do to survive. It’s better than dying. The wound in my shoulder ached as I wriggled free of the heavy material, kicking off my boots to remove it entirely before straightening, back stiff, to glare at him. My skin crawled as his eyes ghosted over me, and he smiled once more. “Good. It seems you can obey, with the right motivation. Ivan, hose down this dog and put him back in his cell. We are done for today.”
As it turns out, ‘hose down’ was not a figure of speech. I was forced, naked and trembling, out into the snow covered yard, where dozens of Soviet soldiers paused to stare and smirk, the only sympathy found in a pair of pale eyes that met mine steadily rather than probing my flesh like all the others. The remote now rested in Ivan’s hand, so I made no effort to resist as he secured me to manacles attached to the wall, willing to be hosed if it meant avoiding another round of electrocution – my muscles were still clenching intermittently. The temperature was below freezing, and the frost beneath my bare toes made my feet ache, but it was a welcome relief after the intolerable heat – at least, until he turned the frigid, high-powered hose on me, eliciting a yelp audible over even the sounds of the populated yard and earning a few snickers for my pains. The cold seeped into my bones immediately, nausea wracking my body at the rapid change in temperature, but I simply closed my eyes until Ivan deemed his job complete and unchained me. I was tossed back into my cell with a threadbare blanket – cold once more, but only as it had been upon my arrival. Curling up in the corner, knees clutched to my chest in a desperate attempt to preserve my body heat while I dried off, I could only wait patiently for him to come again, wondering absently about the needle plunged into my neck.
I was still trembling lightly by the time he slipped into my prison, tray in hand. The water was gone first, swallowed desperately – despite the easing of my symptoms, I was still painfully dehydrated, lips cracked and sticking to my tongue. He pressed against me to keep me warm as I ate, murmuring apologies for his failure to intervene in the yard. But I understood. The penalty for going against your unit was not one he could afford to pay – and it would, in all likelihood, end with us both dead. With a soft sigh, I rested my head on his skinny shoulder, exhausted by several nights with little sleep and shitty rations. “...What did they inject me with?” I murmured, leaning heavily against him. His fingers probed my throat gently, and I winced at the feeling of him palpation a mass under my skin. “...To track you, I think. Or maybe... Neutralise you. If they cannot control you.” I flinched, my own hand raising to my neck, fingers brushing his as I found the small, hard lump before wrapping around the collar at my throat. “They seem to be controlling me pretty effectively…” He grimaced sympathetically, one hand smoothing my hair, my eyes closing despite myself. “I don’t know how long I can keep doing this.” “Bucky, you-” “They’ve already left me for dead with sickness, frozen me, melted me, stabbed me, injected me, and tore my arm from my body. How much more until I can’t come back from it? Until it kills me?” I whispered, tears leaking out unconsciously, vulnerable in the darkness and his arms. “I won’t let that happen,” he vowed softly, squeezing me tighter. “You’ll be okay, Bucky. I promise.” @whumpcember @hurtcember @deaddovedec @fandom-free-bingo @seasonaldelightsbingo
#fandom: marvel#Character: James Buchannan 'Bucky' Barnes#Rating: E#Please heed CW#Winter Soldier origins#fanfiction#mine#writers on tumblr#writing bingo#tem speaks#cw: torture#CW: branding#December 5th#I know I'm behind#I got ill ;-;#CW: stab wound#CW: shock collar#cw: forced nudity
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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Stranger Things (TV 2016) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jonathan Byers/Steve Harrington Characters: Jonathan Byers, Steve Harrington, Nancy Wheeler Additional Tags: Past Jonathan Byers/Nancy Wheeler, Past Steve Harrington/Nancy Wheeler, Stonathan Week, stonathan week 2023, Explicit Sexual Content, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Jonathan Byers, Top Steve Harrington, Post-Season/Series 02, S1 and S2 still happened, Blood and Injury, Injured Steve Harrington, caring Jonathan Byers, Feelings Realization, Tender Sex, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence Series: Part 5 of Snow's Stonathan week 2023 Summary:
Jonathan didn't feel right when he had sex with Nancy in Murray's bunker, realizing that he didn't want her as he thought. He talks with her, breaking up amicably, when she asks him to check on Steve after his fight with Billy. Steve is more than resistant to Jonathan's presence, but the Byers teen persists, and they start talking, discovering new things about each other and themselves.
For @stonathanweek Day 5: Canon-verse
#stonathanweek2023#stonathan#jonathan byers#steve harrington#ns/fw#fanfic#my work#rated e#heed the tags#stranger things
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GET YER HOT N' FILTHY VASHWOOD HERE YOU PLANTFUCKER SICKOS
OOPS ACCORDING TO ELDRITCH XENOBOTANY TRADITION THEY'RE MARRIED NOW
MAZEL TOV
#tnk fic#vashwood#rated E for Excommunication#time to google plant repro cycles again#Heed the tags all ye who enter here
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(don’t) stop texting me by feelthe_beat 96k E cas keeps getting texts meant for someone named dean. he can’t understand why someone would keep giving out the wrong number
#destiel fic#100k#rated E#coffee shop au#barista castiel#heed the tags on this one- it gets heavy#also something that isn't tagged is animal cruelty - it's brief but just know that the cat is ok but figured i'd warn since it upset me#but honestly this is soooo good#cas is so sweet and jack is lovely#also ahhh i love dean being obsessed with bath and body works
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𝐂𝐀𝐁𝐈𝐍 𝐅𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑, 𝐈𝐈 [18+]
familiar! ghost × witch! reader
you are a witch trapped at home by a devastating blizzard. ghost is the demon that answers your call. ( 2 of 3 /PREV )
DEAD DOVE. RATED E. HORROR EROTICA. 9K. – AO3 heed the warnings below and proceed at your own discretion.
warnings: NONCON. graphic depictions of gore. injury. cannibalism. blood licking. slaughtering + ingesting animals. violence. degradation. body horror. hypothermia. isolation. manipulation. corruption kink. religious imagery. dark!ghost. female reader. i know i said 2 parts total but now it's a 3er.
additional tags: groping. tit fondling. rough oral (male receiving). face-fucking. cum guzzling + eating. it’s all a little disgusting and not in the good way i fear.
𝐈𝐈.𝐈
The cottage is halfway buried under snow when you run out of firewood.
It should come as no surprise, though you stare down your emptied closet like the ground opened up and swallowed your remaining reserve. Out of body, you fail to confront the cold reality that has already seeped into your walls, freezing the splintered wood of your floors, instead standing stock-still as your mind sharpens its critical edge.
Only there is no one to direct your reproach to but yourself. Weeks ago, your rune casts had predicted a crippling whiteout, thus you set out to collect enough fuel to last you the season. Yet as night waxed on the third day of your efforts, and your hands started tearing bloody from splitting hardwood all on your own, that resolve debilitated rather quickly. Like sugar steeped in tea; your will to live was already in a decrepit state, and indeed, eagerly unravelled at the first sign of adversity. Suicidal, with hindsight. A passive play at death of which you were too fearful to try and seek for yourself.
It did not seem like that at the time, of course. Rather, you justified the fatuous decision to stop (after cutting down a mere three trees) by concocting an estimate of how long it would be before you could venture out for more. Based on absolutely nothing but a desperation to curl back on your couch, sore but sheltered, you gave it one month. One month until the storm would abate. Of restlessness, fermenting in a prison you call home. To your distorted sense, four-hundred pieces of firewood seemed plenty enough to get you through it, despite admittedly lacking even a basic working knowledge of wood arithmetic.
Counting the days now, you’re almost tempted to laugh. Almost. The shroud of horror that newly accompanies death since Ghost’s lesson triumphs, after all. You are more terrified than you would have been a week ago. Still, you were not wrong – the firewood had lasted a month – only the weather does not seem to be looking up, and you’re trapped inside a quickly cooling cottage with no source of heat to get you to the thaw. The possibility of fatal hypothermia looms closer, more dangerous. Eerily relevant–
(Just a year ago, you watched a man die from the warmth of your ancestral home, face down in fresh snow outside the parlour room window. Your ageing mother had invited the pastor’s son over to help repair the stairs left unattended since your father’s death, and the man had called your fascination with the corpse morbid, nail between two teeth as he hammered down a wooden plank.
No use starin’ at a dead man, lass. Not for a bonnie thin’ like you.
But you could not tear your eyes away from his mottled skin, the blue-black ends of his fingers. Even at his burial several days later, his face displayed the same, blank expression, perpetually cast by that winter’s frigid storm.)
You imagine yourself passing in a similar vein. It will take longer, you think. You’ll be dying for weeks as your blood courses slower through you, iced by the winds that howl down your chimney. Protected, but not enough, by these walls you have been banished to live within. Unable to get even a glimpse of sunlight before shutting your eyes for the last time, the snow packed up to your windows effectively burying you without ceremony. A forgotten tomb.
You wonder if Ghost would intervene, yet your speculation is brief. His words echo like he uttered them only moments ago. Fight or die. He has long established the volitional aspects of your relationship – he owes you nothing unless you ask, and if you do, then you would rather wish you were dead in lieu of what he asks for in return. No. He will merely watch as you take your last breath, satisfied that he was right, then scavenge your carcass for his next meal. Fated to wet his mouth like the picked off crow. A long-awaited feast.
Curling in on yourself, it is all you can do to bury yourself in clothes. Your vulnerability is often a fickle thing, you find, ebbing and flowing like seawater tides gradually gorging on their shore. There are periods you feel invincible; a being made of eternal magic, unmoved by the shifts in nature bid by time. Some sequoia, whose roots pierce deep into the earth and drink from freshwater wells unacquainted with human touch. A thing truly deserving of the title witch.
Other times – these times being of increasing occurrence since the arrival of your familiar – you cannot help but to shrink back into a girl again. Raw and tender and emotionally volatile. Naked, sore lungs, as you’re pulled from your mother’s womb and forced to embrace the harsh cut of air. Ghost watches from his usual corner, a spectre practically pulsing with this voyeuristic game he likes to play. You know he’s figured out the predicament you’ve put yourself in, can feel yourself quailing at the discredit his judgement affords. The layers serve a dual purpose, then – for warmth, and to grant brief reprieve from his gaze on your shivering form.
Three pairs of socks. A tunic, a fleece, a cardigan, and a coat. Skirts over your trousers. Gloves and a woollen hat.
By the end, you have a hard time moving at all. Certainly not enough to cook, or to try tunnelling a way out of the window. No point in reading if you can’t practise your magic, either; so you mutter a quiet ignition spell over the charred firewood from last night, hoping it lasts even half as long, before collapsing on the couch and willing yourself to sleep.
Only sleep does not come.
Or, it might. Yet your mind is so occupied with your condition that it does not allow you to fully lose consciousness. You’re attuned to every particle around you, overstimulated in the worst sense, still subjected to an unsettling sequence of half-dreams. Brain flickering through pale mirages of dead crows, ice floes, of capsized rafts in arctic waters, their hulls resembling slabs of marbled meat. As you drown, you shout for help and pique at the sound of it echoing in real life, tangible enough that it shakes you awake. You nearly strangle yourself trying to wind your quilt tighter around your shoulders afterward, burying your nose in a pillow and cupping your cheeks with frigid hands.
Eventually, time joins the distortion, and you have a hard time discerning whether it’s been hours or meagre minutes. The only indication is the way in which your body starts to ache with a pain so profound, it is as though you’ve been beaten. If you weren’t frustratingly cognizant of your surroundings the whole night, your first bet would have been to blame Ghost, or at least the threadbare couch you’ve been using as a bed erring too long now. Unfortunately, the true cause of your affliction is hard to misdiagnose; a violent, merciless shivering, your muscles made to tremble as if compelled to by electric shock. The teeth chattering kind – and it is exactly the rattle of ivory against ivory that serves as a makeshift timekeeper.
Click. Click. Clickclick. Click.
It must be two hours later when you bite your tongue and jolt completely awake from the pain, swathed in your quilt like the nesting doll that sat on your windowsill back home. Though the appendage bleeds, spreading metallic bitterness onto your teeth, you wonder for a brief moment whether you are alive at all. Foggy vision. Taut skin drawing lines down your cheeks from either corner of your eyes. When you squint, it tugs tighter, and you realise at one point you had started crying. It’s hard to tell without your nose hot and runny, or your lips swollen like overripe berries. Instead, you’re rendered to a shrivelled reflection of yourself, dried tear tracks setting the image in stone. The shadow looming above you seems to agree.
“Not dead yet. But only just.”
You wish you could say his voice is any softer than standard. That the stars aligned, or that this is an ideal world where the antediluvian creature occupying your home has tapped into his small pool of pity. But he nudges your knee with all the detached amusement he prescribes to most things, like he can’t understand why you’re so easily affected by the cold.
“Ghost?”
“Almost exclusively.” He mocks.
The couch dips near your feet. You do not register why until he scoops an arm into your quilt, pulling you from warm refuge and onto his lap instead. It isn’t in you to fight, merely mewling like a feverish cat as you reach a hand out to the cushion where you once lay. Wiggling your fingers, kicking your heels.
He swats your arm until it flops back to your side.
“If only y’could see yourself like this. Bloody pathetic, pet.”
“I’m c-cold.”
“Not doin’ yourself any favours, then. This,” He tugs at the coat barely hugging your shoulders, stretched taut over your bulky layers. “off.”
When you fail to listen, he takes the initiative for you, pulling it down your arms and towards some distant corner. You don’t miss it, necessarily – it hardly did anything to keep you warm – but you protest the loss as you would have done anything else; noisily, sniffing to suppress the fresh bout of tears spooling over your vision.
“Think you exhausted every option, hm? All you can do is curl over and cry?” With his hands now at your cardigan, thumbs hooked under the lapel, you search his eyes for indication of what he intends to do. Ghost is difficult to appreciate even on the best of days, but now, without the handy glow of fire or direct stream of sunlight, he’s practically impossible. Like two mountains stood tall with no valley in between them, no line of logic exists that can explain his actuality.
(And you’ve never been the logical type – there is no precise science to why goat fat and cumin work together to lure someone into love, or why you knew to stay away from the pastor who kept your mother company. Some things exist solely in magical proportions; limiting yourself to rational thought would be doing a great disservice to what they have to offer.
But confronting Ghost on a plane where he has the upper hand is a daunting task, so you stick to what rationale can place.)
“What are you–you doing?”
“Shut it.” He folds the cardigan around your hips, clasping a colossal palm onto the back of your neck. Though you’re used to being scruffed when he’s less than pleased with you, the purpose of this is far from dissatisfaction. You know it immediately. His skin, flesh, is warmer than anything you’ve felt in a long time. A quality of comfortable, penetrating heat that sinks into your nape and slowly works to defrost your marrow, your limbs, the icy film clinging to your brain. Your eyes roll shut almost instantaneously, body slumping forward to sink into his chest. Somewhere in the recesses of your mind, where the relief of warmth has not yet reached, you worry that he’ll push you off.
He does not.
Instead, his other hand slips under your fleece and tunic, smoothing over the knots of your spine to reach between your shoulder blades. There, his heat sinks to swathe your chest, and the weakly heart somehow managing to do its job, pumping blood that tickles your toes and fingertips. It drips down to your tummy too, where it weighs heavy like a tangible mass, and brings your pulse to the bud between your legs.
His touch there doesn’t last long; he pulls away only moments later, a tightness newly lifted off your sternum. One hand still kneads your nape, effectively keeping your face against his broad shoulder, but the other moves to collect your slack wrists together. It strikes you as unusual, sure, yet you’ve since surrendered your inhibitions for sake of survival. A cavewoman tradeoff. Your body purrs at the satisfaction of your baser instincts, happy to resort to this primitive state of impartiality, if only it means you’ll stay snug throughout the winter.
Yes. If anyone were to ask you right then, you would have seen it as not only plausible but entirely necessary to stay like this for the months to come. Sated and secure and just a hint impassioned, content to doze off on the lap of your tormentor. Already halfway there, lashes fluttering as you battle complete oblivion.
Only that isn’t what Ghost has in store, and he seems eager to break the illusion you hold in such high regard.
He releases your neck, guiding you to sit upright upon his tree-trunk thighs. When you object by reaching for his hands again, you find that your own are securely fixed behind your back. Completely immobilised.
Sensation slowly trickles back to you. Once numb, your skin now comes alive with frayed nerve endings, crackling, hair standing on its ends. What you find, alarmingly, is your place within a twisted example of the lesson Ghost has been attempting to teach. The lightness on your sternum not as metaphorical as you had assumed – rather, the bandages binding your breasts have been unwrapped to treacherously hitch your wrists together. The rough fabric excoriates the surface of your forearms.
Your breathing accelerates. If you’d been freezing before, you’re thoroughly iced now. Shock races through your system and persecutes everything that lulled you into this position. Stupid, stupid, stu–
“Ghost.” You hiss. “Ghost. This is-isn’t funny.”
He doesn’t respond, rolling your top to reveal the soft stretch of your navel. It involuntarily retracts when he flits over your belly button, dodging the unwelcome spread of his fingers. Your body's way of protesting, for all you lean into his touch. Too tempting not to, really. Something in him burns; perhaps a furnace in place of his heart, or a piece of hell he takes with him wherever he goes.
That primitive voice grows louder, whispering deceptively in your ear that it’s fine, let him touch you. So long as you stay warm.
You shake your head as if to jerk the instinct off your crown. Lips pursed tight now, the hand on your belly slowly climbing up. Up.
“Stop it. Stop this, I d-don’t want it.”
“I know.” He says, pressing his thumb into your waist. It digs until it hits a rib, tenderising muscle. You’re a lamb on a spit, spun slowly, roasted over an open flame. How silly of you to lean into the burn. Short-sighted to decide that it’s better than the cruel press of winter. You’ll be eaten like this.
“Then g-get the fuck off me!” You yelp, swaying on your haunches in a bid to knock yourself off his lap. Your arms are useless, but that does not mean you cannot fight. “I order you!”
That pulls a laugh from him. Or, what sounds like a laugh. As with everything, it’s his estimate of a human one, like the cicada mimics the bird; not as melodic, rather striking you with disgust so potent you feel your nausea reawakening. You might just hurl.
“And wha’ will I be granted in return? Nothin’ you have that’ll convince me to unhand you, pet.” Ghost rucks your tunic to your shoulders at last, exposing your bare breasts to bitter air. Though he gives them no time to pebble up, large paws enveloping both mounds and squeezing until your breath syphons from your lungs. “Haven’ seen a pair of tits in decades. Suppose you humans do have somethin’ going for you.”
Your words startle in your throat. Nothing about it is pleasurable, nor does he intend for it to be. His fingers take your nipples; rolling, tugging, pinching. Nails dig crescent cuts into the darkened skin there, perhaps searching for blood. He certainly treats it as though blood is the aim, and you wonder whether you’re to be hung from your bust to drain onto his waiting tongue. Just as one might press olives, no care for their pulpy bodies but only the rich oil they produce. Grease to slick their pans, to moisten their mouths.
You’ll be eaten like this.
“Stop, please.”
“Wonder what y’would look like plump with milk. Nursing my litter, rounded out with another dozen.” He sucks his teeth, contemplative. “Body wouldn’t handle it, f’you ask me. Stronger women than you ‘ave tried.”
Have. It hurts to think about. Hurts more when the insult of his words truly resonates. Stronger women. That is to say you have been exiled for nothing. That with a year of solitude and occult practice, you are just as feeble as before. Is this why he ate your crow? To prove to you that he could?
The tide pushes back out. In a great swell of loam and brine, your hatred crashes vengefully onshore. You muster all of it, dipping pails into the water and letting it weigh heavy on your shoulders. It is almost negligible, you find. You scarcely feel its burden when fuelled by a focused point to your antipathy. Your teeth stop chattering. You glare daggers.
“Let me go.”
Your final plea rolls over him like all the ones before it. “But you’re a witch, aren’t ya? Brew up a little elixir to pull yourself through the whelping. Maybe then you’ll realise how much you long to stay alive.”
Your neck snaps back. Before you can think it through, you thrust your head towards his face. There’s a crunch, a dizzying moment of choked silence, then a hot burst of moisture down your face. For a naive moment, you think you must have struck gold. You imagine drawing back to find his mask sticky with blood, or tar, or whatever demons have thrumming through their veins. A raw testament to your resolve, if he should ever underestimate it again.
But the mirage is as naive as your mother. Eventually the pain catches up to you. You realise the iron-tang at the back of your throat is not the dreg of satisfaction. The tears slipping past your lashes no longer wrought from misery. Everything, rather, an immediate response to the sore condition of your nose. Misshapen and swelling already.
Ghost hums. You hoped to see him grovelling in pain by now. The battered expectation somehow makes his condescension worse.
“Good to see y’find your spirit,” His head tilts, bullying yours into remaining still, fingers knitted firmly in your hair. “but it’s misplaced.”
Given his derision, you know not to rejoice when his other hand leaves your chest. Your shirt slumps lamely back over your figure as he lifts the edges of his mask, folding it over his mouth. In the dark, it’s difficult to map the nuances of his exposed jowls. There’s a pale curve there, a disfigured line here. Your sinuses twinge when your stare narrows, cutting through murk to place the shape of his lips.
It’s futile. You have no way to jam the gaps; no way of knowing whether he’s all man, all demon, or a foul mix of the two.
The one thing that glimmers with definition is the string of spit when he unlatches his jaw, long tongue striking like a wound-tight cobra. You would flinch if you could, eyes pruning shut, but his grip keeps you steady in place as he laves a forceful path up your chin. Tasting the metallic leak of blood, all the way up to its source.
You see it coming. Still, you can’t help but scream when he works his tongue around your nose. Loosed bones shift under your skin, steadiness fractured, cartilage support dipping inwards against the assault. He groans, and in spite of your impaired sense of smell, you get a whiff of rot-hot breath. It must all be a terrible dream, you think. The hardened muscle pressing against your inner thighs, the viscous web of saliva stretched across your face. It’s cold and you’re sweaty, and everything about the past month – the past year – seems like it has been especially curated to torment you. You would wake from this any second.
He gathers the salty drips off your eyes, the blood, every grief coating your skin. Agony blinds you – so profound it takes shape, colour. You squirm in your binds, ragged shrieks ripping from your throat.
It echoes even after he breaks away. If it weren’t for the sudden coolness of spit drying within your cupid’s bow, you would think he was still making a feast of you.
“Tha’ got you to settle, hm?”
You shake your head, exhausted. “You said–”
“I said fight, or die.” He huffs. You let silence swathe your lips, pursing them as thin as you can manage without exacerbating your injury. “Yer fighting to die, pet.”
“I just want to be left alone.”
“‘N’ what d’you think will come of that?”
“It shouldn’t m-matter.” Your conviction sound hollow when spoken aloud. If he hears it, he uses it as an incentive to strip your top back over your chest. Like a hot wire pushed through your ribcage, his warm hands toast you from the outside in. It is in your best interest not to shiver in delight; though you are still dreadfully cold, and your injury makes it difficult to pigeonhole any alleviation to your pain. “You can’t-t-t defile me on the grounds of greater good.”
Ghost laughs again. “Ain’ pretending this is for the greater good, pet. The world will thank me if one more witch freezes to ‘er death.” You’re yanked further up his lap. “I let you go, you’ve got four, five hours tops ‘till your heart fails. You wan’ to live?”
You shake your head, fervent tremors batting your pout. A nonanswer seems the only manner of resistance, now. “Not like this.”
“Clever. Tha’ still tells me you do.” He pinches the knotted peaks of your breasts, twisting until you buck wretchedly onto his pelvis. “And I wan’ to spend my evenin’ playing with your tits. A fair compromise, then.”
What sort of familiar makes the demands? You contemplate berating him out loud, lunging for the dirty insult to beat at his status like he did yours. With no room for taking the high ground, you will do anything so long as you can later say you bared your claws. So you do not wonder, for countless sleepless nights, if there was something more you should have done. You will be mean. You will go low. You will condemn him to a fate of eternal dissatisfaction, so that no matter how much he eats or kills or takes, he will always feel his stomach a gnawing pit.
Though something tells you he will not succumb to scrutiny against his honour. There is no code for creatures like him, who floss their teeth with crow meat and pluck the nipples of girls who grant them shelter. Nothing to hold them to expect the conditions of their summons.
Perhaps that’s just it.
You stir. It feels much like magic, when an incantation rolls off the tongue just right and the air shifts to accommodate it. Your heart vibrates behind your sternum, power bloating your veins, ricocheting within your skin. If Ghost feels it, he doesn’t falter.
“Be sure, demon.” You rasp, drawing your intent taut in your chest like a bowstring. He hums but does not stop, kneading your flesh to conform to the creases and calluses of his hands. “Be sure that’s what you want. I could give in without further fuss and be like a docile rabbit on your lap. That way, you will have taken two things from me tonight.”
The liquid of his eyes shifts quick. You catch its gleam in the little light, and it pleases you enough to deliver the rest of your covenant.
“By the spell that brought you here, you are bound to do what I sacrifice for.” You pause a moment. “In exchange for the blood you have ingested off my face, you will dig this house out of the snow. And for my virtue, this one evening allowance of which you have already taken upon yourself, you will collect my firewood until the season clears.”
Ghost makes an indiscernible noise from underneath. You can not tell if he is peeved or pleased, and the ambiguity shakes you. You expected some sort of acknowledgment or counter to your trick. Instead, he does not speak on it. No pitch or complaint, protest or taunt.
He just sits there, pawing at your chest like a satiated dog.
(And come morning, when your breasts are raw and tender to the touch, he tunnels the snow around your cottage and returns hours later with a hundred cedar logs for the kindling.)
𝐈𝐈.𝐈𝐈
She prefers him in the daylight
Sun floods her little home when it rises and keeps it bright until it sets. Whereas the dark plays tricks on mortal eyes, oil lamps flickering, casting shadows that always resemble something else. She likes training an eye on what he does in his usual corner; but come night, she can’t trust what she sees. Thus, her confidence strains. She flinches at every sound. Any movement will have her tucking deeper under her quilt. His empty-eyed stare glows more sinister, if anything is to be assumed by the way she will crack her grimoire open and mouth protective spells like prayers.
Perhaps she’s afraid she caused offence, that he mulls over a punishment to teach her not to make a fool of him again. Perhaps it plagues her that she cannot stop him if that is the case. He does not tell her that, already, the worst possible thing that can confront her has. Though of course she isn’t privy to it, it’s been a month since he decided against making a meal of her. Everything he does now is moderate in comparison. He’s being good.
Good, yes. In the evenings, he will venture out to do her bidding. The timing grants her a few hours rest, then, and him an opportunity to hunt for his dinner.
Good, because he waits until he’s a mile out to transform to his truer self. It is easier to strip trees of their branches and snap their spines when he stands over two metres tall. Not so easy to mend the fragile tolerance she’s gained for him, which is sure to shatter if she catches sight of his monstrosity. He eludes the possibility entirely, then.
Good, because Ghost refrains from agitating her more than he already has. And his intention in doing so does not change that decency.
That is to say, he hasn’t grown a heart. He does not care for the girl. But the passivity that necessitated his savagery has since come to pass. She’s grown claws. She fights for her say and punches through life with guile. Any more and he would be faulting her for it, like burning the meat he tumbled through mud to slaughter. It is down to him to take it off the roast, now, to revel in the succulent bite. He’s got her right where he wants her.
With some brief tampering on his part – laying out the temptation like a breadcrumb trail into the woods – she broke her invisible vow not to ask him for anything. Has it not made her life that much simpler? Her hearth burns bright and warm everyday; she does not have to worry about keeping it lit for the remnants of winter. He picks cedar for its aroma, it's even char, and she would not have access to that if it weren’t for his ability to tackle the sturdy tree. All it took was her debauchment, the vitiating of character to match his.
(And really, how debauched was it if she only endured his groping for one night?)
It isn’t too much to want, he thinks.
She thinks so too. Or otherwise decides it's worth the risk.
It is late into the evening and his dinner sits fresh in his belly, fire chewing away at the split logs he emptied into the pit earlier. The air is thick with cloying cedar and the mephitic scent of potion-brewing, his pet crouched over a bubbling pot. She has been at it for hours, the same nightly routine since she broke her nose. Tadpoles and feverfew and sage, chanterelle and wishbone and sand. Stirred, brought to a boil, thickened with spit. Then scooped out and smothered over her sore face. A modest poultice, turned cast, to help her mend correctly over weeks.
He wonders if she considered bothering him to heal her. He certainly can. But it appears as though she enjoys keeping her hands busy. Toiling through time, grinding away like water does the earth. In the aeons he’s been around, he’s seen mountains chipped away, rocks change shape, rivers bend over time – and it is always the same eternal petulance. Stubborn mediocrity built into something larger. Endurance over brute force. He doesn’t pretend to understand it, but he can recognise a reflection of it in her craft.
But she is not eternal. Every mortal has their limits.
Ghost sees the iron grow filigree in her eyes, calculations imprinting onto her resolve. When she stands and turns to him, he almost expects it. The past quarter hour has built up to this ambitious ask, whatever it may be, and he’s mapped every battle she’s held within herself over the course of it. She does not want like he does. It is only extraneous circumstance that would lead her to his service.
“I started it later than I usually do.” She mumbles, lips twisting like maggots. The hollows under her eyes are prominent, both exhaustion and hunger trimming her down to a sorry state. “I need sleep, but this can’t be heated beyond a boil.”
His cock chubs up in his trousers, aching as an array of possibilities occur to him in that second. Would he split her cunt on his fingers? Would he make her set it down atop his tongue? Her skirt leaves much to the imagination, but he imagines it bright and faithful in his head. Darker on the outside than in, glazed with pellucid slick, and shrouded in a matting of hair. The thought alone funnels salivate to the underside of his tongue.
He meets her eye, shoulders curving inward, poised to pounce.
Then, her brow spasms, and the wolfish instinct unravels as fast as it materialises.
No. He cannot push it too far, not when she asks for something so little. It took all her energy to come to him now. She will never consider it again if he exploits that beyond equal measure.
So, Ghost stands, stalking over to the cauldron and his pet. He often forgets how small she is until she cranes her neck to look up at him, all owlish blinks and delicate fingers latticed together, anxious for his response.
“I’ll wake you.” He says. The tension in her forehead ebbs immediately, eyelids sagging now that he confirmed her ingredients will not waste. Though she doesn’t move, and he makes her stand there until he determines on an appropriate return.
Moments later, he wraps an arm around her. His hand finds the jut in her skirt, where it protrudes to lap over her arse, and squeezes around the fat of one cheek. Even with the layers separating them, she is supple like softened butter. She makes a sound like a trapped mouse, jumping to the balls of her feet. The noise doesn’t deter him; he holds it there until he’s satisfied his grip will bruise.
“There we are.” When he releases her, she stumbles backwards to find her bearings against the cool press of the wall. Puts a safe distance between them. Yet her stunned silence is intoxicating, and he has to actively suppress the gluttonous urge for more. Nothing is sacred when he gets like this. “That’s us even, then.”
She nods. It is a wonder she manages to sleep at all.
(Unfortunate that the potion to heal her broken nose steals stock from her kitchen shelves. Day by day, he’s watched her sacrifice her fungi and herbs to the cauldron, prioritising recovery over sustenance. Unfortunate that she is still unable to go out for more. The winter whips cruel and merciless winds for anyone who dares step out into its storm.
Unfortunate. But not moving enough.
It is intentional silence on his part, then. For the day will come where she opens her cupboards to eat and finds them lined with dust.
And on that day, he will be there.)
𝐈𝐈.𝐈𝐈𝐈
Ghost takes his meals outside.
That is, when he comes back lugging a dead beast and a tree behind him. You’ll watch from the window as he places the latter to the side, sinking to his knees to feast on whatever he caught that day. It always varies: hares, owls, rodents. An elk if he’s lucky. Today, it is a fox.
Your heart knots with pity, mourning for the mammal who cannot grieve itself. Eyes blank and jaw swung open. Its fur, which typically strikes as a vivid red, can only look dull when set by the blood it leaves in its trail, tangled in the entrails bursting from its belly. The demon never minds the hair, nor the carnage. He balances on his haunches and pulls his mask up, sinking his teeth into the softest parts of his spoils.
Though no one holds you to the frosted glass – chanting look, you have to look – you insist on bearing witness. The gore never grows easier to behold; everytime, it is the same revulsion that stews nausea at the sight. But you sit and suffer it anyway. If anyone were to ask you why, you would be hard-pressed to find an answer.
Perhaps it is to build a tolerance for nature’s brutality. Ghost’s lesson with your crow has carved an irreplicable torment within you, revealing the jeopardy you face should you continue down your meek path. Exposure therapy is good justification, then, when your personal improvement thus far has only wrought merit. Your magic begets greater effect. You feel your self-possession flourish your spirit. Even your familiar has staved off the trouble, and you can not ask for a greater success.
But that does not capture the core of the matter. Perhaps that is to be found in him, instead.
Because when Ghost eats, his visage will fluctuate. You do not think it is something he’s mindful of. None of it looks intentional – he does not bid whetted talons or teeth, features that would aid him in gutting the fox. Rather, they appear like fish beneath a rippling brook. Swift, transient flashes of another form.
He sucks down an intestine, and his burly legs stretch so the joints are equidistant. They snap backwards, digitigrade heels extending, before you blink and they’re human once more.
He laps at a puddle of blood, and his mask parts to reveal two ivory prongs that steadily grow from his head. They curl, winding around his temples as ram horns do, only to disappear as your arid eyes burn.
He tears into cartilage, and his exposed skin flakes like charred wood. The liver; his torso extends and thins. The brain; his breath condenses to black ash, as yours would ghostly vapour in cold air. None of it permanent. All of it haunting.
The first time you saw it, you chalked it up to phantasm. Lack of sleep, insufficient nutrition. Searching for monstrosity that would better connect to the horror unfurling before you. So you set out to observe. Incessantly. Again and again and again – validating what you saw, though you received confirmation upon the second instance long ago. Sure enough, each day he reveals different parts to a whole. Excrescent spines and lofty feet. Things that have been urging for a spot in the sun, pressing under his skin.
It’s the nesting doll all over again. Little matryoshka faces, each opening to reveal a smaller version of itself within. If you are the innermost one, then Ghost is the sisyphean effort to close them over each other in descending order. Unfeasible. Too large to comfortably remain within his confines. The wood will eventually snap in your struggle, and all the painted pieces will scatter across the floor.
(You remember him just then. Craggy charm and blue eyes. Crafty hand – the same to restore your mother’s staircase – whittling the doll when you suggested he couldn’t. He wore a cross no matter the day, a habit of his father’s doing, and the silver pendant would sway with the paring motion of his hands. Lustrous against tanned skin. No doubt forged by him, too.
He used to call you macabre. Though it was footling fun at the time, you can’t help but grasp at what he meant as you track the steaming slaughter outside.)
“Do you like it?”
Water rushes into a tin basin, its metallic clang a forceful, echoing percussion. The noise is insufferable, grating on your ears, but you would rather it than have Ghost tow the pungent smell of death into your home. With his back turned to you, he washes his hands and mouth of dinner’s remnants, faucet spitting frigid reserves into the kitchen sink.
His head twists a fraction, pupils coasting to assess you in his peripheral. Small talk is not commonplace. In the weeks you have coexisted, you can count your conversations on both hands. They always seem to prefer the path of internal dissection instead, judgments flung at one another through glares and body language and not much else.
“Be more specific.” He grunts, facing his task again. From your place on the couch, you can see the way he picks his nails for stubborn shreds of fat.
“Fox.”
A sliver of pale skin, bared where his mask ends at his nape, twitches. “No.”
“Why not?”
“Ammonic. Greasy. Tough all ‘round. Slippery little fucks, too.” His voice is softer when he isn’t being caustic. Skipping over enunciations, the typical rumble in his chest quieted to a hum. “There are easier, more rewardin’ meals.”
You imagine what he may be referring to. Of every creature on this earth, only one does not have the benefit of evasion. Predators are sheltered by hierarchical canopies, demons like Ghost so powerful that they do not have to watch their backs. Birds of prey have their wings, fish their slippery scales. Even deer – slender and pregnable – are granted fleet-footed instincts rivalled only by the Pantheon’s messenger himself. It is only you, human, that is condemned to spindling, slow inelegance. Perhaps it is why so many are intellectuals, worshipers, terrors – why you yourself are a witch, sapping nature for her wares of which you do not come by naturally. That is the way things turn. Assuming the offensive to offset one’s shortcomings.
And turn back again; your effort has only imperilled you further. There is a cannibal, a monster, a man inside of your home. And you beckoned him here.
Even as the revelation occurs to you, you can’t stave your ambition. Of course you do not parley with Ghost for the sake of it. There is nothing this new knowledge grants. But since he left to do his day’s errands, your stomach has made its presence known. Opening up like an early grave, emptiness gnarled beneath a soil bed as with roots of a tombstone tree. Every moment, every word, you are reminded of its cavity. Too long, it says, you’ve ignored the pangs of hunger that seized this trench in an iron fist. Priorities, you would reply, as you surrendered food to brew your poultice. And so your nose is healed, great, but your shelves are empty and your head is faint. Hunger surplants the cold as your imminent killer.
“My mum taught me how to fix a good stew.” You begin, rolling your sticky tongue and tucking both hands beneath your bottom, cautious not to set this mousetrap off yourself. The pressure is grounding, at least; you match your breathing to the pulse you feel in your fingertips. “I trust it would be better than raw meat.”
A pause. Ghost’s spine straightens. Then, a panic. You’re thrown off your conviction when your chest flutters and you feel it in your brain. Where is that wily being? The woman who cheated her familiar into a season’s worth of labour? You feel as though you have regressed; screeching infant, lungs flaring with a rush of new air. You cannot face this, you think, but you’re already halfway out into the world. The sink squeaks off.
You just pray your stomach doesn’t make noise in the new silence.
“Is tha’ so?” He says, though does not turn to look at you just yet.
“I could try.” The words bubble like bile in your throat. It is in your best interest to stay quiet. Say no more. He’s being ambiguous so you will reveal too much in turn. The game is transparent. You can see the water-worn rocks on the river bed, so clear it’s like they’re clasped between your hands instead. Yet– “If I had the ingredients for it, ‘course.”
There. The lip of the cliff. How odd of you to see it only as you plummet towards a frothy scree. Ghost snaps, live lightning in heated air, or otherwise like the rocks that impale you on landing. In two strides, you’re cornered by a creature with scorn harrowing the space between its brows. You were stupid not to plan an escape route, stupid to arm yourself with nothing but flimsy subtlety. There was always the risk of it coming to this, you knew that.
“You think y’can rummage for loopholes, hm?” He leers, eyes searing holes into yours. “A trick is only charmin’ on the first go, pet. More than once and y’start to stink of stale piss.”
“I don’t–”
He snatches your jaw, thumb and ring fingers digging an aching grip onto either side. Your protest warbles pathetically, dies, chokes you with its rot. It’s difficult, no– impossible to decipher what he's mad at. A small, fresh part of you actually hoped he’d see your cunning as artful. But it seems your station has come back to haunt you; another mortal whose brain cannot keep up with her heart. Even if one is in the right place, you will go about chasing it in the wrong direction. Artful is too shiny of a laurel, then. Trick, too, is being charitable
“Do not play coy with me, girl. I do not take kindly to underhand deals.” Snarled right above you, spit spattering across your face. Your mandible squeaks, bone-deep pain flaring where he tightens the pressure around your face. Fox blood flavours his breath. There is a ringing in your head – shrill, like water in the tin sink. “If you need something from me, you will admit it and cope with the terms I have in turn.”
“I-I’m sorr-eeeee.” Your apology wheezes thin when he thrashes your head in place. It is either that or the relentless force on your jaw that tears a new world of pain down your neck. The tears are reactionary, then. Hot and foggy and not at all a sign of fear. “Ah- I’m sorry! I won’t– I didn’t mean to offend y-you.”
“S’too fuckin’ late for that. You’ll follow through, before I take wha’ I want anyway.” He shakes his head. “Ask nicely for what y’need then, pet. Go on.”
“Nothing! Nothing anymore, please. Jus’ let me go, Ghost.” Perhaps the universe disdains your insincerity, because in a hand dealt by its inexorable irony, your stomach buckles and purls a foul sound. Like it heard your words and protests the withdrawal, gurgling out loud to whoever will address it instead.
And he does. He does.
“You’re hungry, hm? That it?” He shoves your limp body onto the floor, dismissive of the pleas you now regulate to your feet, thrashed wildly to strike at his shin. Everything he does is callous, mean, agitated like the sulphur and magma that run thick beneath the earth’s crust. And though it is not your first encounter with a creature of that ilk – you have had your run-ins with over-excited men – the intentionality behind it has never been more flagrant. Ghost does it to hurt you. “Yeah, been neglecting you, haven’ I? Forgot pets couldn’ feed themselves.”
“I’w scrounge somefing up mysef.” You struggle, speech impeded as he crushes your cheeks inwards. Pearl dust flakes your gums.
“Should ‘ave thought of tha’ before. Even if I end up breakin’ every bone in that fine skull of yours, I won’t let up. Say it, then, you daft thing.”
The scaling of your options is instantaneous. Even as your immediate conscious lags behind, activity lights the back of your head and cracks its way out of your mouth before you can catch it. It took weeks for your nose to heal, much less your skull. You’re consuming fuel quicker than you can replenish, running on a backlog of quick-burning fat. And all of it can be taken care of if you just give in, to what will likely only be a few hours of degradation.
(Cavewoman. Primordial. Primitive impartiality, or survival of the fittest. The world has only come so far since then, and even within its concentrated civilizations, there is no aegis but for those who come up on top. You cannot expect your liberties to be met anywhere. That, you know too well.
But here, in this feral forest, at least you can use the violation to your benefit. At the very least, you will not be exiled, cast as witch for taboo of saying the greater word.
You are already macerated on rock bottom. And at the barren abyss of all leasts, Ghost will not hang a cross pendant above you as he stomps it in.)
He must see the surrender wet your eyes, for the grip on your jaw lessens.
“I am hungry.” You cry, finally, lashes fluttering shut so as to guard your tears. “I am hungry. This winter has dashed my garden and I do not know how to hunt. The cushions jab into my ribs when I sleep. I feel as though my stomach will consume me from the inside out, and I’m desperate. I am desperate, and I am so, so hungry. And I am asking for your help. Please.”
If there was any part of you that still believed he would choose pity, it is muffled and killed. You hear the scratch of fabric as he undoes his pants. Final, failing. Rustled hand behind confines, stench of musk stiffening the air. For a few seconds, you opt to remain blissfully ignorant – keep your eyes closed and imagine that the presence before your face is something different. A purifying flame, tender cut of meat, a smiling face before things fell downhill. It all sounds too good to be true, and they are. Sooner or later, you tell yourself, you have to face the misery.
So, you force yourself to behold it before he takes that upon himself.
His cock is heavy. Fat and oversized, length not having suffered for its breadth. Ruddy where the head peaks from an uncut tip, hard already, but bowed under the weight of itself. If you had anything to expel, you would’ve done so by now. A thicket of hair fledges his groyne – a shade of dark that pales his scarred skin in comparison – and it reeks of sweat and miasma.
He taps it on your cheek, prespend sticky and warm. You flinch as though you have been beaten.
“Just one thing af’er the other with you, pet. Think this’ll give y’something to fix yourself on.”
“I don’t– I’ve never–” His thumb hooks over your bottom teeth, prying your trap as wide as it can go. Drool slicks the cracked hinges of your lips. “Don’ know how.”
“Not what I’m lookin’ for.” He purrs, cruel humour gracing his tone. Somehow, it is not a reassurance as much as it is a snub. “Jus’ keep your teeth out of the way.” Humiliation washes your neck and ears, rush of blood like white river rapids behind your ears. It is the final swatch, trumpet to armageddon, before your ruin. You suck in a breath and bring your mouth to him.
Ghost meets you halfway, treating the crown of your head as an anchor to thrust forward. Immediately, you let slip his only rule, teeth snapping reflexively at the intrusion. You expect to be backhanded, have your hair ripped from your scalp in relation, or worse. It is a relief, then, when the only force you receive is a knock against your jaw. The rapping shakes your cotton-lined skull, snaps you out of your stupefaction, and you slack all muscles to accommodate his demand.
The mass feeding down your throat vibrates, an appreciative hum coursing through his body. “There you are, little jezebel. Look a’ you takin’ my cock so well.”
You make no effort to glide your tongue along his veins. To make this pleasurable for him beyond what he takes for himself. True to his word, your familiar does not punish you for it. He knots his hands around your head and fucks your face, careless, cock rearranging the anatomy of your neck as it bludgeons a straight path down. You sway, ragdoll with the motions, knees rubbing abrasively across the floor as he slides you back and forth over it.
Hypoxia spots your vision, lungs clenching furiously at the obstructed flow of oxygen. You would fasten it all shut, close yourself off from the world, but your eyes bulge a little at the edges, stagnant blood keeping them arid and open. It’s hard to dissociate. Hard to pretend that the steel-wool friction at the tip of your nose, the pendulum-consistent slaps on your chin, are not his pubic hair and balls searing unmistakable marks on your skin. And your series of gags are sloppy, lewd out in the confined air of your home. How could they be anything but damnation? There is no deluding the Maker.
(No matter how fervently he tried. Marry me, proposed down on both knees. It’ll set this whole fankle right. We’ll hold hands an’ seek penance at the kirk before th’ceremony. My pa will officiate. Yer ma will be thrilled.)
Snot bubbles from your nose, cheeks slick with tears and wayward spit. When he batters forward, it amalgamates in the soft palate beneath your spasming tongue. When he draws out, he takes it with him, viscous strings of saliva bridging the gap. It streams down to your neck, glosses your lips, webs your lashes together. You feel buried beneath its stifling coat, set down into your grave at last. Maggots worm their way into the soft matter of your brain, eat away at the tissue until there’s nothing left but suffocation. Death. Throttling void.
Your hands flail out, seeking an end to it, but all you find is Ghost.
He slows down once he nears his end.
The bruising pace he set stutters, balls tightening against your submental. It catches you off guard because, for the past ten minutes, you accustomed yourself to the patterns of his push and pull. For every plunge, there is a retreat, where you will greedily feast on fresh air before being choked back down on his cock. It is a break of tide, an opportunity to paddle your way above water to clear sea-salt from your hollows. A bay to hold onto so you do not drown.
Until now; his forearms twitch and you’re kept in place, forehead squashed onto his mons. You panic, hold on your breath breaking. The heady scent of sweat sweeps over you, laced with the tart products of your mouth – saliva and blood from where your canine pierced your cheek. Prespend, too. The undiluted stink of him. Hair tickles your lips. Your cunt flares, sudden, slickening the chafe of your thighs, but the unwelcome arousal does nothing for you.
He holds your head down and spurts his load into your gullet.
There is no room to swallow. It goes in the wrong direction, then – upward – and out your nose. You squeeze your eyes shut, disgusted scream gargling around his throbbing appendage. Distress bloats your head, temples feverish and sweating, nails digging deep impressions into your palms. It’s futile. Useless. Nothing thwarts him but the last dregs of semen spitting out onto your tonsils, pumping himself dry until finally, finally–
Ghost pulls out. You collapse onto the carpet and hack up cum until your throat bleeds.
The silence afterwards is mortifying, tension palpable enough to writhe up against. Drained, you’ve since pressed your cheek into the puddle of filth, urging pearlescent spend to seep into the fibres below. It'll be a nightmare to clean later, you process slowly. Perhaps you’ll use the bleach, and take the same sponge to your lips.
The monster above you tuts at the display, crouching to your level when you exhibit no interest in rising to his.
“C’mon, sweet. Wouldn’t want to waste your dinner now.”
But you’re too weak to lift your head. So Ghost gathers your hair, puppeteering – in a manner rather gentle for your assailant – until you can lap his essence off the floor.
It tastes like raw venison. You snivel your thanks, and imagine it is exactly that.
i do not have a taglist. to be alerted when i update, please follow @moondirti-archive and turn on post notifs.
#i skimmed over this once but honestly im too exhausted to properly edit#no beta yada yada we die like men GOODNIGHT!#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ‘ghost’ riley x reader#simon riley x reader#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ‘ghost’ riley#ghost#simon riley#x you#x reader#x female reader#tw noncon#dead dove do not eat#call of duty#cod#modern warfare#cod mw#fic ༄ cabin fever
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Five Hargreeves Meagalist
Hello, I write aged-up Five Hargreeves smut. Sometimes also not smut. But mostly smut. This is a compendium of my work.
Request status: Closed Request info + rules
[Based on behaviour I have become aware of on here: I know saying 'don't plagiarise my shit' will do nothing to stop actual plagiarists, but just know that, if you do, you are no better than ChatGPT and will not see the light of heaven.]
One + Twoshots
Not Smut (G-M rated)
Tickle War | Five Hargreeves / GN Reader (Fluff)- Words: 1.5k
Dickhead Sugar Daddy | Five Hargreeves / GN Reader (Angst/Fluff)- Words 2.8k
Two Old Men | Five Hargreeves / GN Reader (Fluff)- Words 3.3k
No Blinking! | Five Hargreeves & 3 y/o daughter (Fluff) Words: 3k
Twelve Feet Away From the Mistletoe Part 1, Part 2 | Five Hargreeves / F Reader (Fluff, angst) Total words: 5.8k
Senseless | Five Hargreeves/ GN Reader 1.3k words, Rated T/M (Angst + steamy)
Strings Attached | Five Hargreeves / F Reader (Steamy angst)- Words: 4.8k
The Changeling | Five Hargreeves / F Reader, Five Hargreeves & 8 y/o daughter (hurt/comfort) Words: 7.7k
Smut (E rated/18+)
NSFW Alphabet | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader - Words: 2.4k
Two Items of Business | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader/ FReader- Words: 2.1k (kind of a crackfic. Not my best.)
Goddamn Darling | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader- Words: 2.1k
If Tonight Was Our Last | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader- Words: 2.4k (mild smut, probably between M+E ratings)
Boy Wonder | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader- Words: 2.7k
Lucky Fucking Pillow | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader- Words: 3k
In Your Hands | Five Hargreeves / GN Reader - Words: 3.1k
The Birthday Boy | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader- Words: 3.8k
Your Desperate Man | Five Hargreeves/ GN Reader- Words 2.8k
Venus and Cupid | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader- Words 4k (inc. fluff, romance, hurt/comfort)
The Birthday Girl | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader- Words 2.8k
The Pandas and the Conservationist Part 1, Part 2 | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader - Words 11.8k.
My Kind of Deli | Five Hargreeves/ F Reader - Words 8k.
Series + Multichapter fics (best read on AO3)
Hard Feelings (E rated/18+) : 6 parts
You're Five's latest assassination target, but things don't go to plan and now he wants you as his fuckbuddy. What starts as a casual relationship soon comes to mean everything to him, but what can Five bring to a relationship? After 45 years alone, (or almost alone), how do you rebuild your understanding of partnership? Five has to listen, learn and face the future as well as his past.
Includes: No Hard Feelings Before A Fall Flesh and Blood Arrow of Time After We Fall The Years Between (oneshot collection)
READ ON AO3 READ ON TUMBLR
The Neurosis of Five Hargreeves (M/E rated): 2 Parts
Covering Five's readjustment to society post season 3. This series uses prose, monologues, transcripts, and case notes to explore Five's mental health demons, delusions, and recovery from decades of apocalypse trauma.
Not canon compliant. In this household, season 4 never happened.
Includes: Alias Number Five She
READ HERE
The Moth and The Spider (E Rated): Please heed tags.
Maybe it was the booze, maybe it was the fear, or maybe some sick, twisted part of him was titillated. Even looking back, he never knew. In the dark of nights years in the future, he couldn’t help linking how it turned out to this one mistake. Perhaps if he’d fought her just a little longer, it might never have turned into what it did- perhaps it would never have gone beyond that first night. In fact, it seemed likely: that’s how he knew it was all his fault really.
The Handler knows Five will be a difficult agent to control, but she also knows how to exploit his weaknesses.
READ HERE
Headcanons
Usually based on Tumblr asks:
SFW headcanons because I am capable of them y'know
Cooking
'Not like other girls' girls
Five hates himself
Five as the father of a son
S4 speculation
My dreams for Five in S4 (boy, was I disappointed)
Why Five's favourite word is "shit!"
What would Five look for in a partner?
Would Five be ok with not having kids?
A guide to flirting with Five
Five and Wordle
What did Five do in the apocalypse? (mention of masturbation- not graphic)
Five's enjoyment of murder
S/O stealing Five's jackets.
NSFW headcanons ah, safely back in my lane
NSFW alphabet
Five's relationship with the Handler (triggering content)
Five with a menstruating S/O (NSFW only because references sex)
Five + submissive pillow princess
Hargreeves brothers sharing sex tips
Five and flirtatious jokes (mild)
Mannequin banging: part 1 , part 2
Apocalypse sadwanks
Five eats pussy like a madman
#the umbrella academy#the umbrella academy imagine#umbrella academy x reader#the umbrella academy smut#the umbrella academy five#umbrella academy number five#umbrella academy five x reader#umbrella academy five x you#five hargreaves x you#five hargreaves x reader#number five imagine#five hargreeves imagine#five hargreeves smut#number 5#number 5 imagine#number five smut#number 5 x reader#number 5 x you#no hard feelings#Hard feelings#Before a fall#Flesh and blood#Thing of the Past#masterpost#fanfic#Enjoy my shitty banners#tua fanfic#masterlist#five headcanons#five hargreeves headcanons
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masterlist
hi! i'm ceilidh (she/her); late 20s; writer
some housekeeping:
follows and asks are not from this blog sorry!!!
i write nsfw and some dark fics; please read and heed the tags i add
18+ only please
i actually write for quite a few fandoms (cod, star wars, shadow & bone, the rings of power, etc), but this blog is going to be primarily cod
where you can find me:
✨✨ support me ✨✨
twitter
bluesky
ao3
carrd
links:
general writing tag
ghost prompts
ghost/soap/reader prompts
soap prompts
price prompts
gaz prompts
soap/gaz/reader prompts
141 headcanons
series & masterlists:
ghost prompts (ao3 series)
take me home, country road | masterlist
sirius c | masterlist
landscape with honey | masterlist
fear of god | masterlist
still wakes the deep au | masterlist
buttermilk | masterlist
my ao3 fics:
saltwater (17k, rated E, ghost/reader)
Petrichor (Emphasis on the Ichor) (2.6k, rated E, soap/reader)
come with me to a place I've been (3.5k, rated E, ghost/reader)
desire paths (6.9k, rated E, soap/reader)
birdsongs, or advice and symphonies for your children (5.1k, rated E, price/reader)
in the cauldron boil and bake (5.5k, rated E, ghost/reader)
the terrible nature of ghosts (25k, rated E, ghost/soap)
catch and release (4.5k, rated E, ghost/soap/reader)
landscape with honey (10.5k, rated E, price/reader)
superstore (12k, rated E, soap/reader)
dogteeth (2.4k, rated E, ghost/reader)
sundog (8.5k, rated E, ghost/reader)
sirius c (27k, rated E, ghost/soap/reader)
hound dog (6.7k, rated E, ghost/reader)
take me home, country road (75k, rated E, price/reader)
buttermilk (14k, rated E, price/reader)
fear of god (ongoing, rated E, gaz/reader)
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📝🦊Cas🏳🌈🎵
they/them/she/he - queer - married
This is a safe space- I'm always here to help <3
Age: Over 21
Fandoms: Marauders with a side of drarry.
Ships: Jegulus, Jegulily, wolfstar, rosekiller, pandalily, dorlene, drarry.
Music: Taylor Swift, Conan Gray, Olivia Rodrigo, Lana Del Ray, Hozier, Renee Rapp, Chappell Roan, Gracie Abrams
AO3: my_castlescrumbling
Writing: Requests open!
Link to list of crisis hotlines for many different countries Link to Marauders Knowledge Quiz Link to list of requests (requests are open)
***Please allow me 3-5 days to get back to advice asks! Remember to check back if you write anonymously, you won't be tagged. If I don't reply after 5 days, please resend, sometimes tumblr eats my inbox messages 🙄
(Also please note that I am not a professional. All advice is just one random person's opinion. When you send me an ask you are acknowledging I am not liable for whatever happens if you chose to listen to a random person on the internet 😋)
Please do not post any of my work on fanfiction.net/wattpad. I welcome collaboration, podfics, and translation with permission. I do not support the use of AI in fanfiction/fanart. I do not want to join any websites that involve writing fanfiction for pay.
If you are a minor, please do not interact with any content I mark explicit-minors DNI. This is for both my protection and yours.
Below the cut:
My ao3 Fics
My Microfics
Fic Recs
Request/reading boundaries
Advice/ask boundaries
LGBTQIA+ resources
Writing tips
Song covers
My ao3 Fics:
Note- I am writing all fic ratings. If you are a minor, please take heed. If the fic is rated E and you are a minor, do not interact with it.
Ongoing WIPS:
dark humor and dry cereal - rated E - rosekiller with other background ships - WIP - AU dating site/text fic, smut with minimal plot - minors DNI
Multiple ships
Long Story Short - Rated M - dorlene, wolfstar, jegulus, background rosekiller and pandalily - completed - 152k - AU-everyone lives/nobody dies/no Voldemort - A longfic with a long explanation? Basically how hurt/comfort leads to the three main pairings.
That's Different, Then - rated G - Jegulus and Wolfstar - completed - 2k - Sirius thinks James likes Remus. James does not, in fact, like Remus.
Jegulus (JamesxRegulus)
Clandestine - Rated M - jegulus, background wolfstar, dorlene, pandalily, rosekiller - COMPLETE! AHH! - 142k - AU-everyone lives/nobody dies/no Voldemort - mostly Regulus's POV as he attends Hogwarts - Trans reggie
Clandestine: B-Sides - Rated M - jegulus, wolfstar, dorlene, pandalily, rosekiller - 3k - In progress - Missing scene from Clandestine!
Gleaming, Twinkling - rated E - jegulus - 8k - complete - same characters as Clandestine, jegulus first time - Minors DNI
Focus On Me - rated E - jegulus, background wolfstar - 19k - photographer!James, model!regulus AU - trans Reggie- Minors DNI
Whoops. - Rated T - jegulus - completed - 2k - AU-University/Muggle - Regulus is a TA for Professor Monty Potter. What happens when he goes to the Potter Christmas Party?
Mistletoe - Rated G - Jegulus - completed - 1k - James has a plan to finally kiss Regulus.
Warmth - Rated G - Jegulus - completed - 1k - Holiday fluff
Noises - Rated E - Jegulus - completed - 2k - it's just smut, guys - Minors DNI!
Imagine Being Loved By Me - Rated E - Jegulus - completed - 9.1k - Ice skaing AU! - Minors DNI
Terrible at Friends With Benefits - Rated M - Jegulus - completed - 2.4k - Jegulus thinks they're FWB but obviously they catch feelings
Sure, but only if you watch - Rated E - Jegulus - completed - 1k - a challenge is given - Minors DNI
Like in Your Stories - Rated E - Jegulus - completed - 1.6k - James catches Regulus reading smut - Minors DNI
Show Me - rated E - Jegulus - completed - 1k - Regulus is usually quiet - Minors DNI
Of boredom and overheard phone calls - rated E - Jegulus - completed - 1.5k - James overhears Regulus working - Minors DNI
Grieving His Sanity - Rated G - Jegulus - .7k - completed - Regulus realizing his feelings
Good Morning - Rated E - Jegulus - 1.5k - completed - Trans!Reg, soft Jegulus - written for the Maruaders with Palestine Project - Minors DNI
Sure - rated M - Jegulus - 4.4k words - completed - Jegulus falling in love and Reggie running away to James's - written for the Tortured Poets Department Fest
Perfect Size - rated E - jegulus - 1k - completed - omegaverse fic - minors DNI
Ruined - rated E - jegulus - 1k - completed - trans!Reg - minors DNI
prove it - rated E - jegulus - 2k - completed - FWB to more - minors DNI
Sit Quiet By My Side - rated G - jegulus - 1k - completed - sickfic
of plastic bottles and paper cups - rated G - jegulus - 1k - completed - blind date mixup fluff
Not Like the Novels - rated T - unrequited Jegulus - 2k - completed - for the Conan Gray Marauders Fest! - warning: angst, MCD
It's a Secret - rated G - Jegulus - 1k - completed - Muggle roommates idiots to lovers
Perfect - rated E - jegulus - 1.6k - completed - trans!Regulus, smut - minors DNI
Safe - rated T- Jegulus - .5k - completed
No Swimming - Rated E - Jegulus - 1.5k - completed - swimmer James saves drowning Regulus muggle AU - minors DNI
Obviously Not Interested - Rated G - Jegulus - 1.5k - completed - professors Jeg!
Not Possessive - Rated E - Jegulus - 1k - completed - Regulus is a possessive little shit - minors DNI
It's Time - Rated G - Jegulus - .5k - completed - mpreg, James is very calm when Regulus goes into labor
Never - rated E - Jegulus - 1.5k - completed - trans!Reg, smut - minors DNI
Never Have I Ever - rated T - Jegulus - 1.1k - completed - muggle, getting together
Sirius Proposals - rated T - Jegulus - 1.2k - completed - asking Sirius for permission to propose
A Work of Art - rated G - Jegulus - 1k - completed - Art gallery meet cute
You're the Risk, I'm Gonna Take It - rated T - Jegulus - 5k - completed - roommates-ish pining with a happy ending
Wolfstar (Sirius xRemus)
Three Hundred Takeout Coffees Later - Rated M - wolfstar - completed - 4.5k - AU-coffee shop/muggle - fluff, love, healing
The Plan - Rated G - wolfstar - completed - 1k - AU-everyone lives/nobody dies/no Voldemort - Wolfstar proposal
Slow Hands - Rated E - wolfstar - completed - 5k - Sirius realizing he loves Remus, smut ensues. - minors DNI
Of Toy Stores and Gag Gifts - rated E - wolfstar - completed - 6.6k - Remus works at a toy store and shows Sirius around - minors DNI
Idiots - rated M - wolfstar - 2.5k - completed - a wolfstar 5+1 fic
Prank Wars- rated T - wolfstar - .5k - completed - get-together
Of Romance and Play Practice - Rated G - wolfstar - 1k - completed - High School AU
Not Jealous - Rated E - Wolfstar - 1k - completed - enemies to lovers college roommates - minors DNI
The Art of Gift Giving - Rated G - Wolfstar - .5k - completed - Idiots in love
of jokes and 'lost' jumpers - rated E - wolfstar - 2k - completed - minors DNI
I Never Stopped - rated T - wolfstar - 1.7k - completed - post-Azkaban wolfstar
Ribbons and Lace - rated E - wolfstar - 2.5k - completed - minors DNI
of research and ropes - rated E - wolfstar - 3k - completed - inexperienced, repressed Sirius - minors DNI
Extra Credit - rated E - wolfstar - 2k - completed - minors DNI
Drarry (Draco x Harry)
Of Firewhiskey and Stupid Speeches - Rated T - drarry - completed - 1.5k - Eighth Year - Hurt/comfort - Pre-Slash
Bad Press - Rated T - drarry - completed - 1k - Eighth year - mostly fluff
Stuck - Rated T - drarry - completed - 2k - Eighth year - hurt/comfort
No ship (friendships)
You Asked For It - Rated G - completed - 1.5k - Marauders friendship mostly - Pre-Wolfstar - Sirius and James and nerf guns
The Deeply Threatening Physical Attributes of Werewolves - Rated T - Marauders friendship with some wolfstar - completed - 1k - James, Peter, and Sirius making Remus laugh
Man of Honor - rated G - 1k - completed - a gift for the lovely Abby for her birthday - no pairing, just trans!James with supportive best friend Marlene
Rosekiller
Sit. - rated E - rosekiller- completed - 1.5k - Barty in a skirt - minors DNI
People Say I'm Jealous But My Kink is Watching You - rated E - Rosekiller - completed - .5k - minors DNI
Scream - rated E - rosekiller - completed - 1.2k - masks - minors DNI
Other ships
Dibs - rated E - starchaserkiller - .5k - completed - it's smut, guys i minors DNI
My Microfics:
Jegulus Microfic Archive
Wolfstar Microfic Archive
Rosekiller Microfic Archive
Jegulily Microfic Archive
Explicit Microfic Archive - Minors DNI
Kinktober Microfic Archive - Minors DNI
Fic Recommendations:
AHHHH guys this list got too long! Please click here for a link to a google doc I made with all recs!
Request/Reading Boundaries:
A lot of people have asked to send me things to read or requests for writing. I LOVE when people send me these things, but just a few boundaries:
No MCD
No incest
No illegal age gaps
No noncon, in any sense
No EDs, SH, or SI
Advice/Ask Boundaries:
Advice about sex (how-to, positions, etc)
Personal topics like my own intimate life, my own personal information (IRL name, names of family members, etc)
Topics that I am not educated on, or do not have a right to give my opinion on. While I am happy to talk and give advice about LGBTQIA+ issues, I am uncomfortable sharing my opinion on issues that I am still working to learn about, because I don't want to spread false information or be unintentionally hurtful. Also, since I hold a lot of privilege, there are certain topics that I would rather amplify the voices of others about, rather than taking up my own space.
LGBTQIA+ Resources:
Here are the websites I often link to when giving people advice. I'll add to these as I find more!
Need help? The Trevor Project has Crisis Counselors
The genderbread person- (sexual attraction versus gender versus romantic attraction)
List of nonbinary identities and definitions
List of ace identities and definitions
A highly-reviewed chest binder that ships to like a hundred countries
Pronouns explained
LGBTQIA+ travel safety guide- world
LBGTQIA+ rights/safety by state in US
United States LGBTQIA+ student rights
The Trevor Project- Sexual Orientation Information
The Trevor Project- Gender Identity Information
Pronoun closet (try different pronouns)
Writing Tips:
Write a lot.
Don't worry about mistakes or editing. Just write a lot to get your ideas out. Practice makes better, and writing a lot will help you gain confidence. You don't have to post it anywhere of you don't want to!
2. Try microfics!
Microfics are a great way to practice writing certain ships, or just practice in general. They're also lovely for getting a feel of posting! They're low-pressure and low-commitment, which is lovely!
3. Find people to write with.
Whether it's people online or in person, find people to talk about writing and write with. It's very motivating and helps hold you accountable.
4. Be gentle with yourself!
This is supposed to be fun. Don't beat yourself up or be too hard on yourself.
5. Write down your ideas.
Ideas come at weird times. Write them down, because you'll forget them.
Song Covers
Sometimes I sing...
People Watching - Conan Gray
Gravity - Sara Bareilles
Blank Space- Taylor Swift
Idontwannabeyouanymore- Billie Eilish
Sparks Fly - Taylor Swift
So Long, London - Taylor Swift
#marauders#harry potter#marauders era#fanfic#marauders fandom#harry potter marauders#the marauders#marauders fanfiction#sirius black kinnie#wolfstar#lgbtq+#lgbtq#lgbtqia#lgbtq community#introduction post#intro post#blog intro#introductory post#introduction#pinned intro#pinned post#james fleamont potter#james potter#james x regulus#regulus arcturus black#regulus black#james loves regulus#regulus deserved better#harry x draco#draco malfoy
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He Chose You (Pt. 13.5)
Lucifer/Reader: Lucifer chooses you to be the mother of his child. Rated E for Explicit.
(So, this is a quick update because chapter 14 keeps getting more complicated but I promised a continuation last weekend and couldn’t get it out due to health concerns. I hope y’all can forgive me for such a short chapter piece, but thank you for reading regardless!)
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 13.5 | Part 14 | End
“You’re here.”
You paused, hands already wrapped around Lucifer’s as the words spilled from both his and your mouth. In spite of everything, you giggled semi-hysterically and the stalled expression on Lucifer’s face relaxed as well.
He looked at you between the bars of the gate, eyes shining to the point of tears. You pressed harder against the bars of your cage as if to slip through, one hand raised to cup his cheek and thumb the cherubic blush there.
“I didn’t think I’d get to see you again.” He admitted, surrendering to your touch.
It hurt to smile but you couldn’t help yourself. You grinned through your own tears, dripping down your cheeks before falling to the clouds beneath. You were struck by his admiring gaze, even with the blurring of your vision. It reminded you of the many times he’d looked at you when you were a mere mortal and not privy to the knowledge you had now.
You had tried so hard to fight against what that look meant, stupidly thinking you wouldn’t fall prey to it if you feigned ignorance.
The King sniffled, hand intertwined with your own as you explored the planes of his face once more. He closed in on the bars that kept you from each other, slumping forward to press his forehead to yours. He inhaled deeply, trying to absorb everything that was You without heeding what lay behind him or beyond. His wings had expanded to their full glory, acting as a screen between you and the less than welcoming retinue that had just attacked him. Lucifer couldn’t provide full privacy from the throng of nosy citizens gathered behind you. But at least you were shielded from Gabriel and his goons for the time being.
“It’s alright.” You soothed, fingertips fleeced through his blond hair. “We’re together now.”
The noise he made was more a sob than a laugh as he intended, but your heart swelled at the sound. For a moment you soaked in the touch of his face against your own, in all of its cold, marblesque glory. If you closed your eyes, you could convince yourself that you were back home, spending another lazy afternoon trussed up with Lucifer in your bedsheets.
Your eyes opened again, suddenly.
“Lucifer, where’s Charlotte?” You asked.
The father of your child seemed out of sorts at the question. His mouth opened and closed like a gaping fish’s before enlightenment brightened his features.
“She’s fine!” He replied. “She’s all tucked in her crib, fast asleep.”
“Her crib… at the Farrows?” You gulped down the shot of bile that raced up your throat.
“Well… yeah,” Lucifer’s smile wilted at the hysteria building behind your eyes like a tsunami wave. “I couldn’t very well bring her with me!”
“So you left our daughter with those people?!” You couldn’t help the shrill accusation from leaving your mouth when a million and one horrible possibilities ran through your head.
“No! I would never!” Lucifer denied, head shaking vigorously. “She’s being watched over by the goats!”
Your eyebrows rose, rearing back. “What?”
“The goats! The ones with little wings and tails that I made? I showed them to you right before you… well, you know!” Lucifer caroled. “Remember?”
You stared at him blankly until the metaphorical lightbulb in your brain flicked on. Incredulity bodied you.
“You left… our baby… with stuffed animals…?”
Lucifer stilled for an instant before reanimating until his body resembled less a sturdy human’s and more a flexible jello mold as his arms pinwheeled at his sides. The Devil’s wings flapped and shuddered with his anxiety.
He matched your hysteria with a frenzied laugh. “Oh! No! Not— I wouldn’t! I-I-I gave them sentience! Th-that-that was the plan! I was gonna tell you before but — I-I guess it slipped my mind after you started glowing!”
Lucifer attempted to steady himself after the sudden burst of emotion as you stared in alarm, though he was panting when he leaned forward.
“They were made for Charlotte. To cater to her every need! And if anything happens, they know to get me right away!”
His eyes went wide and earnest. “I would never, ever, ever put our baby in danger. I swear to you. Never. I-if I could’ve brought her with me, a-and been sure that no one would try to take her, I’d —”
Your fingers brushed over his lips as soon as he was within range again.
“Okay.” You interrupted.
Lucifer blinked.
“Okay?” He asked.
You nodded, taking his hand once more to press a kiss to his knuckles. “I believe you.”
Your kiss had the desired effect. Lucifer melted into a daze, smiling almost shyly at the gesture before you looked into his eyes again. You tried to communicate your sincerity without words, for it would take far too long to tell him everything you’d discovered upon arriving in Heaven.
You sighed softly, feeling his warm breath on your face. Lucifer gravitated toward you, close enough to kiss between the infernal bars holding you back…
“Lucifer, I…” Your words came out shakily, the heartbeat you shouldn’t have ringing in your ears.
His lips were a hair’s breadth away. Too distracting. Your eyes fell shut. “I… lov-”
“I fucking told you this would happen!”
You froze.
A harsh voice rose above the din and fray, bringing reality with it to jolt you upright.
Lucifer’s expression fell, warped by shock and horror as you were ripped away from his grasp and pulled back from the gate as if it were on fire. You gasped as your back collided with another’s chest and an arm wrapped around your midsection.
Your head snapped up to see Adam’s ghoulish mask hung above you, glaring over your head at Lucifer. He continued to squeeze the life out of you as he flew back and stopped a good meter away from where you’d been standing.
“Let go of me!” You shouted, squirming in the man’s grip. You dug your nails into his forearm, trying to pry him off of you. An unusual feeling lanced up your spine, something that was not quite pain but uncomfortable and indescribable. It further disoriented you as you were dragged back.
A force of wind blasted over you and Adam, stopping the latter in his tracks with a curse. The gale blew back your extremities, forcing you to cover your face to block the brunt of it. You squinted through it to catch another glimpse of Lucifer.
The Devil’s wings pumped through the air in his rage as he stood ablaze in red, ivory and gold. He looked much like he had before your death: a fiery comet promising destruction to anything in its path. Pure energy radiated off of him from all sides as his horns protracted from the crown of his head. Fire bloomed between them to match the blood red that had overtaken his eyes, and the jagged stripes rippling over his porcelain face.
His fangs gnashed and once delicate hands contracted into long claws that grappled with the gate panels until they bowed and bent under the pressure.
Gasps and screams filled the air all around you.
* Tag List: @crescent-z, @for-hearthand-home, @undertale-is-sansational, @loslox, @navierkalani, @yaimlight, @ivoryviness, @crystalplays28, @flowerempress, @wally-darling-hyperfixation, @altruisticradiodemon, @moonlight-readings, @halparkebitch, @charliecharlie65, @sockgoblin, @cocomollo, @caniseethefourthsword, @squeegeeclean, @crow-twink, @an-emovision, @marydragneell, @lafy-taffy, @fandom-imagines1, @loquacious-libra, @glowymxxn, @avadakadabra93, @froggybich, @hamthepan, @ukor02, @adaizel, @boogiemansbitch, @vinillies, @lbcreations-blog, @thesoundresoundsecho, @serenity-loves-red, @alientee, @aquaamythest96, @0strawberrysorbet0, @fluffy-koalala, @washeduphazbin, @rebecca-hvnstn, @velvette3, @kermitdafroggy, @wpdarlingpan, @apatcheworkofproblems, @cherry-cola-100, @pink-apples001, @al-of-the-stars, @backinthefkingbuildingagain, @martinys-world, @alastorssimp, @wobblesthewaffle, @shikiribee, @undertale-anomaly20, @asakura-fangirl-stuff, @ringsofpersonti @angelicwillows, @wingoodlilboymyway, @cimadreamer, @museofzealoushope, @oneiric-rotaerc, @call-me-nyxx, @darling-angel222, @elementwind91, @bloody-delusion-expert, @devilslittlebabyxx, @diffidentphantom, @shamblezzz, @ranposanedogawa, @minamilinaqueen, @1-helluva-hazbin
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Happy two years to this fic! This is one of the more uhh messed up fics I've got (would you believe it started off as a soft & fluffy smut fic?!) do heed the tags!
Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death Relationships: Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu & Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Arahabaki/Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) Characters: Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Arahabaki (Bungou Stray Dogs) Additional Tags: Aliens, Alien Gods, Arahabaki is an alien, Pregnancy, Pregnancy Kink, Mpreg, Forced Pregnancy, Pregnant Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Sexual Content, Mild Gore, Blood, Apocalypse, Birth, birthsplosion, bone eating, alien babies, End of the World, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, BSD Dead Dove Week, no happy ending, Character Death, Death, Flesh eating, Cannibalism, Well - Freeform, the babies had to eat..., Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Post-Canon, Alien Reproduction, Established Relationship, Not Omega Verse Summary:
BSD Dead Dove Week - Day 7 - Gore/Body Horror
Like many Gods, Arahabaki is actually an alien from a distant planet.
When all of his plans to destroy Yokohama get stopped by Dazai and his nullification ability, he decides on a new plan of destruction, one, that will involve his yet to be born children and as Chuuya's husband, Dazai becomes the unfortunate 'vessel' to grow Arahabaki's children...
#bsd#bsd fanfic#bsd dazai#bsd chuuya#bsd arahabaki#dazai x chuuya#dazai x chuuya x arahabaki#bungou stray dogs#dead dove fic#heed the tags#also read the opening note#mcd#e rated#complete fic#read on ao3#fic birthday#darke_faerie fics
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Hail Hydra - Chapter Seven "The Only Way to Deal With an Unfree World is to Become So Absolutely Free That Your Very Existence is an Act of Rebellion."
Bucky gives rebellion another go – and his only comfort is taken from him. CW: Canon-typical violence, neglect, locked outside in the cold, homophobia, shock collar, cliffhanger. Prompts filled: ‘First Night’, December 7th prompt, Dead Dove December; ‘Broken’, December 7th Prompt, Hurtcember 2023; ‘Fainting’, December 7th prompt, Whumpcember; ‘Locked Outside’, Winter Wonderland Bingo; ‘You’re Insane!’, Multifandom Flash (Double).
Check it out on AO3 here, or below the KR with the boards!
I woke slowly, pressing closer to the warm, slender body half-beneath me, comforted by gentle hand stroking along my spine, unerring over healing wounds and fading scars. “Hey,” I whispered, shifting to rest on my chin and meet his gaze, his free hand propped behind his head to smile softly at me. “Good morning,” he breathed, fingertips moving to skirt my jaw affectionately. “I… I must go. It is getting later than I would like… I’m sorry.” I nodded once, letting those fingers guide my chin up to brush my lips against his, humming contentedly. “It’s okay… I wouldn’t want you to get into trouble.” He kissed my forehead gently, slowly easing my body from his, and I couldn’t help but wince at the cold floor on against my sleep-warmed skin. “Try and get some more rest before Ivan brings your breakfast, Bucky. I will see you tonight.” I nodded softly, wincing at the sunrise that came through the door as he opened it and lighting him from behind. Ethereal.
Ivan’s typical routine was to open my cell door, toss the tray onto the floor – often scattering most of the contents onto the concrete – and back out, leaving me to eat in silence until I was called upon for more torturous experiments. But the light under the door brightened, and still, nobody came. The hours trickled by slowly, my boredom so great that I almost began to miss the torture by the time I finally heard the grate of the bolt on the door. “Американский. On your feet.” “I haven’t had breakfast,” I growled, fingers clenching into a stubborn fist, raising my head where I was propped against the wall. Short of a few broken toes, smashed with a hammer and healing slowly, I was relatively unharmed, and would not be going quietly after a day of endless waiting. All I had here was the vague routine, and taking it from me had threatened to drive me mad; I would not be meek and compliant for their ease today, no matter what they threatened me with. “Is that the next plan? To starve me out?” He snorted, and my body crumbled beneath me as he hit the control in his hand, muscles spasming automatically at the electricity flowing through my bones. My jaw clenched unconsciously, biting back the agonised scream building in my throat as he approached me. “Yпрямый Американский.” Despite my pain, the second the convulsions stopped I lashed out, his own groan of pain sounding alongside the crack of his snapping tibia as my fist collided with his shin. I scrambled upright as his leg folded grotesquely beneath him, scrabbling in a panicked excitement to my feet and towards the door. I barely made it two steps before he hit the controls once more, sending me to the ground, cursing my idiocy and clawing at the concrete, the current frying my mind until I faded from consciousness.
Awareness came slowly, with a biting wind on my bare skin and heavy weights around my limbs, shivering even in my forced sleep as I blinked into the darkness. “You will not stand? You will kneel instead.” My eyes raised at the voice, and I shifted to raise my head, but found a strong rod keeping my head bowed and knees bent. Snow swirled, eliciting another shiver, and I realised for the first time that I was outside, the drifts around my legs stretching as far as I could see, interrupted only by a pair of black boots. “Chilly out here in the evening, is it not? I thought you would be tired of the cold.” “Why am I out here?” I spat, watching the clouds formed by my words drift beyond my eyeline. “This? Oh, there is no experiment here, Американский. This… Is punishment.” The doctor’s grin was predatory as he squatted before me, eyes sharp when they found mine. “You and that предатель have been very bad boys.” “Предатель?” He smirked viciously, moving forward to drag me around by the hair, eliciting a pained hiss. My eyes rose just high enough to see the snow-smeared outline of another person opposite me, restrained in a similar manner. “Traitor.” “B-B-Bucky,” the man opposite stuttered, his teeth chattering audibly, and as I squinted through the dusk I found him dressed only in his shorts, bare legs submerged in snow, my heart stopping as pale eyes found mine. “Aleksi,” I breathed, bile raising in my throat. “No…” I can survive this, but he can’t. “Please,” I whispered, turning my eyes to the doctor once more. “Please. You can do what you want to me. I won’t fight you anymore. Please, leave him be.” He simply smiled once more, shaking his head. “Oh, I do not think so. He does not deserve forgiveness, and neither do you. Maybe watching your lover die will break your spirit.” “No!” I snarled, straining against the chains that held me fast, the bar at my back digging into my skull as I fought to straighten my head until warm liquid dripped steadily onto my bare shoulders. “You can’t do this! You’re insane!” I cried, my muscles aching as I fought. “At least I am no педик,” he spat, leaning forward with dark eyes. “Faggot.” I let out a roar of pure hatred, lunging as best my restraints allowed, hand curled into a fist as I trashed – but I was too weak, and held too fast. “Bucky.” My eyes shifted automatically at the murmur, my sensitive hearing picking up his voice even over the whirling snow and the sound of my own heart pounding. “Bucky… I-It’s okay. It’s okay.” “No. No!” I roared, tugging harder, the cuff around my throat cutting off my breath and forcing me to relent. “It’s o-okay,” he repeated, hands shaking violently as they rose to placate me. “I do not regret my actions. I-I knew this cou-could be how it ends. It is ok-okay.” “No,” I whispered, tears filling and spilling from eyes, voice cracked and broken. “It… It was just once. It was the first night. It was a mistake- it won’t happen again. Please… Please don’t do this.” The doctor smiled once more, moving closer to me, his breath warm and scotch-scented on my face. “Beg.” “Please,” I breathed immediately, trembling. “I’ll do anything. Don’t kill him – not for me. I’ll do anything you want. Please. I won’t fight; I’ll let you do whatever you want to me, just… Let him go.” He straightened up once more, hands curling into fists by his sides as he considered my request. “You want me to show him mercy? You’ll behave?” “Yes! Yes, please. Please!” I begged, straining once more. “I’ll do anything you ask of me!” He took a step back, body shifting slightly as he turned to consider the man restrained opposite me, shaking violently from the cold.
@whumpcember @hurtcember @deaddovedec @multifandom-flash @seasonaldelightsbingo
#fandom: marvel#Character: James Buchannan 'Bucky' Barnes#Rating: E#Please heed CW#Winter Soldier origins#fanfiction#mine#writers on tumblr#writing bingo#tem speaks#December 7th#CW: violence#CW: shock collar#CW: cold exposure#seasonal delights bingo#winter wonderland bingo#multifandom flash bingo
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fic recs: archive edition 30
I was considering putting this project on hiatus over the summer, especially as I'm away at our summer cottage for several weeks now, but I've gotten asked if new rec lists will be out and that made me quite happy! :) So here you go! We're moving into 2022 now and the fandom was slowly starting to see some hints of where 5B would be taking us.
Previous rec lists are found here!
kiss me, kiss me (i don't know if i can let you go) by ipretendtobesane (@usereddie) As Buck is leaving one evening, Eddie kisses him goodbye without thinking about it. And Buck gives him a kiss back. And then it keeps happening, but they keep not talking about what it is. There's not way that can lead to any misunderstandings. 10.3k words, rated G
Come then, and be broken by @unintentionalgenius During a call Buck disappears without a trace, and a detective thinks it fits the pattern of a killer who seems to target first responders. Eddie does not handle it well, and we get to see him, Maddie, Bobby, and Chimney try to process their fear and grief. Heed the warnings and tags. 98.2k words, rated E
am i more than you bargained for yet? by lecornergirl (@clusterbuck) Or, what happens when I wax poetic about Eddie in eyeliner to Emma one too many times. The 118 put together a charity talent show, and if Eddie is going to perform an alt rock song, Buck will damn well make sure he looks the part too. 4.1k words, rated E
your voice as my lullaby by talktothesky (@thatbuddie) Soft established relationship fluff where Buck comes home a little drunk from a wine night with Maddie. 1.5k words, rated G
i'm headed to the mountains by hammersmiths (@henswilsons) Abby POV fic mostly during and after 3x18, of her trying to deal with Sam getting hurt in the train derailment and what she did to Buck, and why. 7.8k words, rated G
Happy reading, and thank you for the continued engagement with my posts!
#frida's archive project#fic rec#buddie fic rec#911 fic rec#buddie fic#911 fic#buddie fanfiction#911 fanfiction
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nicht-zuhause-sein (link to ao3 here) 43k
Leo licks the taste of the kiss out of his mouth. This is not for you.
f!reader, rated e. heavily inspired by house of leaves (pulling from both it and the myhouse.wad doom mod which is itself based off the book). horror, dubious consent (oh my god it's so dubious), smut, hypnotism, emotional manipulation, breeding kink, possessive behavior, (yandere? kind of. not really. eh? eh.), ptsd, panic attacks. this is a dead dove fic, so please do heed the tags.
i was going to post this on halloween but i have no self control so. enjoy ✨
#i had. an absolutely. UNGODLY AMOUNT OF FUN WRITING THIS ✨#vibrates at light speed. vibrates enough to power a small power grid. enough to emit an audible noise. [frodo voice] it's done#anyway. this fic is better if you've read house of leaves but it isn't necessary to enjoy it. have at it. ok. tag time.#tmnt#rise#leonardo/reader#rating: e#my fic
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