#heavier somehow
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Ugh, this feels like a bad drug trip and I am actually feeling sick.
#zombies run s3 spoilers#zombies run s3#zombies run spoilers#zombies run#zrs3 spoilers#zrs3#Sam's voice also sounds different#heavier somehow#I can't tell which is which anfnajr#I am nauseated#haha all this while Kaleo's break my baby plays#so dang on point#bad drug trip feels right on line with Janine's description of how it feels to be mind controlled#clever very clever
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For anyone who could use a smile. Here are two pictures of my dog being a goofball and doing a blep.
#Dog#For note#He’s sitting on my lap for the second picture#Which is why he’s turning around to look at the camera#This dog is heavier than me and yet somehow convinced he’s a teeny tiny lap puppy#Guess he must be right#Given he still gets to sit on all of our laps#Even though he squishes us#Also sorry for the white background on the first picture#Too much of my house was shown#foe me to be comfortable with#Foodsies rambles in the tags#but what else is new
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i want top neuvillette who's still femme and a crybaby my god is that so hard
#/lh#my tastes. masc bottoms femme tops#to be fair my dynamic with them is neuv gets pregnant but neuv also tops. so generally speaking. solid switches. but wrio bottoms#he's the king of the underworld after all.#i do think its hilarious tho if you look at the trends across wrlt vs nvwr interpretations#the tops always gets broadened...... masculinized.... aged#and the bottom becomes this waifish wet noodle..........#like ive seen bottom wrio with a baby face. paired with a neuv who's somehow broader than him#and alternatively ive seen the. meatiest. manliest middle-aged man wriothesley with a neuvillette who's back is perpetually arched#and im like the dimorphism is crazy /j this isnt just a strictly wrlt thing tho this is real across. every ship. that has ever existed lol#tho on a more serious note i have a big squick when it comes to bottom wrio interps where an emphasis on their dynamic is........#the fact that he's younger. or that they first met when he was a minor. im like weird thing to emphasize but ok.#disclaimer tho when i say crybaby hes not a Childish Man mind you. hes Sensitive and Awkward but he's still got that weird ancient stalenes#his voice just wobbles sometimes. he often sound like hes at the verge of tears even if his face is perfectly flat#hes autistic like that#and the sole reason why wrio doesnt top That Much is because hes fuckin tired man. eepy. hes like my god neuv if you still wanna go at it#ur gonna have to take the reins. baby im tired.#something something freakish dragon strength and stamina#personally. my hcs are as such. neuvillette is very lean. almost uncannily long if i exaggerate it for funsies. hes slenderman coded. skinn#but you find no texture underneath his skin. you can't feel bones or muscles shift when he moves when you touch him#there's this exceptional discomfort when you see him lift something that looks much heavier than he should be able to manage#almost like his long fingers might impale it. like you are balancing something soft and fleshy on a nail. it doesn't feel secure#like if wriothesley held you. his arms would feel warm and solid. thick and supportive. whereas neuv's feels like it might dig into you#i could yap all day.
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the problem with dhmis is that all of its tumblr sexyman shit is completely 100% separate from the show itself but thats the only thing a lot of people on here know it for. which is a shame because unfortunately the undeniable truth is that don't hug me im scared, both the websites and the tv series, absolutely fucking slays
#like its so good. its genuinely unfairly good. literally no notes its a perfect series#if somehow you havent seen it then watch the original web series and THEN you HAVE to watch the channel 4 series#i love the c4 series it leans heavier into the comedy than the webseries does but shockingly that is to its benefit its so fucking. grahhh#sorry. the problem is that the tumblr sexyman human clock show is unironically one of the best things to come out od#online indie creators in the past couple decades. and is one of the Only examples of a web series being perfectly translated#into conventional television. sorry i just. grahhhh this show was a hyperfix of mine like 6 separate times jesus christ#tl;dr I LIKE PUPPET GORE. PUPPET GORE IS MY FAVOURITE
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i try not to envy my pretty friends bc that’s not a thing good friends do & also it’s cringe to be self conscious about your appearance but i’m gonna be honest it’s pretty upsetting to always be the ugliest girl in the group photo
#soapbox#partly it’s bc i cant pose#but also i’m way heavier than all my friends and somehow my face is always bright red#and if i don’t smile i look sad and if i do smile my entire face scrunches up and i have like 5 chins and i look like a chubby little boy
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...
#im still procrastinating so bear with me#ive just been thinking abt something. like the idea of a support system#bc as a 1st year grad student ppl around me r like: it must be hard being away from ur support system or ive left my support system when i#moved halfway across the country. and like i dont really feel that way bc idk the idea of a support system is sorta odd to me#like for me i guess it would just b my parents who i kno love me but im just so weirdly asocial that i never really talk to them#like i hardly ever text them. we talk maybe every couple months. so like i guess i theoretically have support but its a bit abstract#and like i have friends i guess but again im a bit weird and dont really feel connected to ppl so i dont feel that close to anyone#surface level friendships i guess. i dunno. i just feel weird not not having a support system but also having it b hollow#i guess i cant feel it more now. like i feel like getting diagnosed as bip0lar made my problems seem more realized to my parents#like i dunno i just assumed they knew i was doing awful most of the time but maybe that wasn't the case#its such a weird thing to b diagnosed with. like the conotations feel a lot heavier and i feel like im not supposed to talk abt it to ppl#bc theyll think im unreliable or something. like it wouldnt b that big a deal if i was just depressed but the sometimes buring out of my#skin makes me somehow scarier. and i still feel conflicted bc i do have a bip0lar mood profile but i have very very high impulse control#and even when im going high my mind is still super rational about it. which seems weird bc low impulse control is common with#the diagnosis. its also y i dont fit an 4dhd profile. not that it really matters. i fit the criteria enough to be on the bip0lar spectrum#its not like someone's gonna come yell at me for not being bip0lar enough. i just feel odd about it is all#still feels fake i guess. hard to imagine feeling any different to how i feel now. which is weirdly stable. so i guess the meds r working#sigh... ok enough i need to go to sleep at 7pm so i can get up at like 2 to finish reading a paper. for some reason my god forsaken brain#works better in the early morning rip#unrelated
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mary haunts me she’s horrible she actively makes the world a worse place she would report her own child to the circle while being a mage herself HYPOCRITE but then you talk about what her upbringing was like how young she was when she marries cullen how isolated she is from everyone else how if someone had stepped in and actually offered guidance during inq days it would have been better for her and suddenly she’s a wet sopping cat in the rain to me. i think she’s giving me the cullenmancer experience in 2024. anyhow fantastic character can’t wait to see her assassination in veilgaurd 👍
YOU GET ITTTTTT... she's literally the worst person and fucks over so many people but like. so many failures happened to Make Her That Way... and maybe her narrative could've turned into some big redemption if she was a different person but she's just digging herself as deep as physically possible. the maker loves her but NOT enough to save her 😍
and tyyy i hope she dies in a way that makes everyone who's ever known her feel sick 😁
#ask#anonymous#when i first started coming up with mary i was like well cullen sucks so. that explains that.#but then i did some of his romance and he was just like a generic gentleman. which is somehow worse#he's Nice to her. ☹️ but that makes everything else heavier.
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Merlin BBC Twitter account updated their bio everyone suspects it's to announce the moving of platforms but also hopes it's for something more
Saw somebody being like I don't want more because the writing in the show the first time around was so good >:( it was perfect as it was
I love this show to death but no the fuck it was not lmao the effects were ass the writing was also ass there was more hole than substance in the plot and it SLAPPED
Objectively BBC Merlin was a terrible show and I love it with all of my heart bc the actors put their whole pussies into queerbaiting us the hardest anyone's ever done it for five straight seasons and personally if they make more god I hope they do it again
#i want a second iteration of merlin bbc and i want it to be worse#i want it to have even heavier implications somehow. and still nothing comes of ot#i think that would be funny
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Waltz Of The Dead
Chapter 1: Have You Heard The News?
The room was loud. It was so loud. There was screaming. There was crying. Dead eyes that kept staring at him, crying for people they couldn't remember anymore.
And yet there was one ghost Varian couldn't find. The one ghost he wished was there.
He would do anything to see him again.
Anything.
#varigo#varian and the 7 kingdoms#vat7k#team awesome#hugo vat7k#fanfic#my fanfic#teehee#so mind the tags#for now mostly just cw for mental illness#there are some codependency issues later and some heavier themes#it’s important to me you all know this originally came from a tua au and i somehow transplanted it over to varigo#saw tua and went “but what if it’s the dark kingdom though”#and now this#be nice to me im terrified
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ok I’m getting a bit obsessed with Spiritbox guys
#i’ve listened to mostly them for the last few days lol#some is a little heavy for me but i’m getting into those songs too#and the more mixed/melodic ones are just such a vibe#makes a change listening to female vocals too :)#that along with the heaviness and electronic elements scratches a different itch somehow#i love the repeated lyrics/songs flowing into each other on the fear of fear especially#angel eyes pushes my tolerance for heaviness but cellar door is growing on me and the others are awesome#i’ve noticed finding out the lyrics helps me enjoy the harsh vocals more so i’ll persevere - there’s a couple of other bands i’ve been#exposing myself to them via too. i won’t listen to stuff that i don’t like but i like heavier music so getting used to that would be good#and when it’s a few lines in a breakdown or something i actively like it so… progress!#dustnroses.txt#spiritbox#metal#metalcore
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#543
WELL.
SPAMMED TAGS WITH AN ESSAY?
im very proud of these rambles but i can't understand why do i love to spam tags sm
#днявочка#днявочка: hlegacy#eng tag#днявочка: фандомное#damn wright#so i was peacefully asleep and then it came to me that wright is clingy but attaches Value to every hug she received or asked for#because when she was little her parents were too busy so any moment of Family Love was cherished and of gold and --#-- slowly wright was remembering it all after The Battle. what her life was like before everything or what she thought was it like#i couldn't just kill off her mom off-stage i had to implement her in-full somehow so; not to overshare much but sharp will come to know her#and he'll tell everything he learned to wright as he'd originally planned but rookwood intervened and well it's a long story#by the time of that convo blorbos developed bonds over some things already but at that moment -- it was a rubicon ahead of them#wright felt lonelier than ever and sharp couldn't just leave her there for the sake of keeping the subordination up#wright entrusted him with the knowledge and her life and sharp stood by his word; she was *his student* after all and sought his help#so that how it started; still a mentorship but deeper. heavier. *falconry metaphors here*#they did become very close after The Battle but here's the catch: both of them didn't realize it right away#wright's clueless but sharp is always vigilant; he didn't want wright to have too much on her already cluttered mind especially --#-- family related bc the topic is very dear and personal to her. for sharp it was more like 'family what family' --#-- it's tied to scarborough incident (it took his hopes of having any family along with the ship but tshhh oversharing)#so. imagine a loop of suffering; wright seeks comfort and when she finds it in his arms she feels hardly any better because --#-- it reminded her of her father of her mother but sharp is neither of them and the thought of it alone brought wright down very much#sharp isn't a substitute either -- and fear of losing him lingered and ohmygod how much talking they'd go through#self-indulgent part of it: when you're thick skin you tend to oversee many damaging things and may not even know smth has gotten under#wright thought she overcame her losses but in reality she never did and all these events only uncovered her lingers
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finishing a book and this complicated feeling stays in your body like in your spine while you decompress because it ended like that and this and that happened and no song really seems appropriate to listen to but you're also not ready to be dragged out of it yet and you just
#🐭📓#it's not even the first time i've read that one but it somehow hit harder the second time#reading stuff other than fanfic and with heavier themes than i usually want blorbos put in is good for me i think but yeah#wanna just go back to bed now lmao
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playing stardew again and looking at mods. i hope everyone who does portrait mods that gets rid of harveys mustache explodes
#andre.txt#like u dont 🥺🥺🥺like da silly stache? ???? /?? not even a little 🥺🥺🥺#i am also. very heavily trying to ignore the sheer amount of nude/porn mods of the women. heavy sigh#and the uh. white washing. even heavier sigh.#stardew valley portrait modders when you ask them to keep the features of the characters. impossible task somehow.
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disaster averted: idiot realizes she's trying to put away her electric kettle with water still in it
#bee chats#i came so close to absolutely soaking myself in water#but somehow realized in time that the kettle was heavier than it should have been
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@qwincy
“ Haah...”
Standing in the foyer in wait for Quincy Eiden sighs. There’s a forming pattern that Eiden can’t help but acknlowledge. It happened with Zhang San too, initially so Eiden can’t help but feel the responsibility here. Maybe it’s just the time he’s spent apart from Quincy and sure, the taciturn nature of the man plays into it but more than often but these days upon meeting they still keep finding their way to bed.
There’s nothing inherently wrong about it. It’s comfortable cycle and Eiden loves watching the sleeping man besides him but it feels a little different as it did in Klein. He’s enjoyed teaching Quincy new things too, not just about the toys either, but the modern appliances and feels happy to be relied on as usually it is Quincy that helps hims out but even so he feels like there’s still too many things he’d yet to tell that get lost in between the sheets and the long blissful naps. So he’d thought they should get out today. Find some mulled wine and comfortable corner somewhere on the island, maybe by fire where there’s time and space to walk.
Last night returns to his mind. It really does feel amazing though there’s no denying that but --- Eiden slaps his cheeks. Anyway. He should make sure they get further than the foyer this time.
“ Quincy! “ he then yells into the apartment, “ I’ll wait outside ok? Take your time though! “
Without waiting for the answer Eiden reaches out the door and steps out. There he freezes, eyes widening at the sight.
“ Holy sh-- “
“ Quincy? Come here! You won’t believe this!! “
#qwincy#qwincy02#03crocusamongus#somehow this came heavier than my initial thought was lmao#i feel like it'd be more logical for quincy to wait eiden but maybe hes struggling with some appliance or something idk sljdkd your call
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besties who drink. tell me. what is it like to be tipsy or drunk
#i tried drinking today and i felt some physical effect like feeling a bit heavier but nothing else#my parents said it just makes them feel lighter. like it's easier to laugh from things and such#my brother usually starts yelling and is a bit Out of it but he also doesn't get tipsy he gets DRUNK drunk so.#i don't have a lot of points for reference#a few weeks ago i drank like 3 cocktails and smoked a joint and felt literally nothing different idk what's up with my body 😭#please. i just want to get out of my brain somehow for like 5 minutes. is it too much to ask for. smh#alcohol //#ask to tag
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