#head empty mind ricky

[mujinzzzzz]

so head empty rn im gonna scream

[teaxeee]

I don't belong here | Shen Ricky & Park Gunwook

Summary: Even though you weren't the type to go to parties, there had to be an exception made for your friend. Little did you know that you'd reunite with a certain individual along with meeting a new one.

Pairing: Female reader x Shen Ricky x Park Gunwook

Genre: Smut (as usual, Minors DNI), one night stand

Word count: 3491 (wow almost 3.5K very surprising)

Warnings: SoftDom!Ricky, slightly MeanDom!Gunwook, fingering, clit slapping, finger sucking, nipple play, lots of praising, slight degradation, pet names (princess, slut, pretty girl, bunny), bulge kink, kind of? MonsterCock!Gunwook, cum eating mentioned at the end

Notes: As soon as I saw the pic I knew I had to drop something, they looked TEW GOOD for me not to write anything about it. Anyways, enjoy pookies!

Song recommendation: I Don't Belong In This Club - Why Don't We

How did you end up in bed with two hot boys? It all started out with going to a friend’s birthday party and as much as you hated going out and being in crowded places you had no choice but to attend. You were wearing a baby pink off shoulder mini dress, the fabric perfectly hugging your curves, showing them off just right. Your makeup looked perfect, it wasn't too strong but it was enough to have people turning their heads. Your hair was also perfect, the soft curls complimenting the dress and the makeup well.

By the time you arrived at the party the place was full of people that were familiar but also that weren't. ‘Why the fuck are so many people here?’ You muttered under your breath as you got out of your car and closed the door. It was a miracle you somehow managed to find a space to park the car. 

You sighed, holding your purse and the bag containing the gift in one hand, locking the car with the other as you made sure every door was properly locked, you could never go wrong with checking every door, the last thing you wanted on your mind was someone to try and steal your car or anything that's inside it.

After confirming that the car was indeed locked you put your purse over your shoulder, while you held the bag and started walking towards the house. Your heels clacked against the concrete, the sound being noticeable in the empty streets. You kept your posture straight, your hips swaying slightly as you walked confidently. 

The house wasn't far thankfully, the walk being short just by 5 minutes from where you parked your car. Music could be heard as you stepped at the entrance of the front yard, taking slow steps as if not to damage your heels. You kept walking and stopped near the door shortly after, quickly checking if you had everything in your purse and making sure the gift wasn't broken in the bag.

You took a deep breath and walked inside, already met by the smell of cigarettes mixed with the strong alcohol, the loud music already starting to ring through your ears. There were a few people in the middle of the room dancing, at least there was an attempt with the drunk ones, and it was painfully obvious by how their bodies swayed. 

Meanwhile, there were a few couples, some of them being in the corners and eating each other's faces off. ‘No wonder love feels so disgusting.’ You thought and shook your head, your main focus being greeting your friend, give the gift to her, wish her a happy birthday and flee away from the party when given the chance. 

“Y/N! You're here! I almost thought you wouldn't show up.” You heard your friend, Celine exclaim excitedly as you approached her. “That was the plan at first, but it would've been a shame if I missed my best friend's birthday.” You said, seeming almost nonchalant compared to her, being overly excited. 

She mumbled a small ‘thank you’ and you both hugged, her happiness boosting as soon as you both broke the hug. “Happy birthday! I hope you keep being smart.” You say sarcastically as you give her the bag and she happily takes it. “Thank you, I hope you find a boyfriend soon.” She talked back sarcastically and you rolled your eyes, causing you both to laugh.

“I heard that Ricky is here.” She added in, already catching your attention with those words. “Ricky? As in the Shen Ricky?” You questioned, watching as she set the bag on a table full with other gifts from the other guests. “Yeah! I saw him with a friend of his, but he did have a huge glow up.” She proclaimed, and you already knew her words were 100% true with how confident she sounded. 

“It's no surprise with the way he ditched classes but still managed to get good grades that he'd also get a glow up too.” You muttered under your breath, not seeming surprised at all that you'd somehow reunite with him one way or another.

“You should talk to him. Bet he missed talking to you.” She suggested. “There's no way I'm talking to him.” You said, already turning to leave, but she quickly grabbed your wrist, restricting you from moving away further than initially planned. “Come on, it won't be so bad. Please?” She begged and you knew she was up to no good whenever she didn't let you leave. 

“If you're concerned if you're going to get along with him or not then I'm sure you'll have a conversation flowing. Just go and talk to him!” She urged, already pulling you along with her as you both walked over to find Ricky and his friend and you surprisingly found them both quickly.

“Well look who it is!” Ricky said, sounding smug as you both approached him and his friend. “Haven't seen you in a while, sweetheart.” He added, clearly unphased by the way you were trying to keep calm in front of him, a smirk forming on his face as he looked at you up and down, shamelessly checking you out. “It's nice to see you again, Shen.” You mumbled, the shyness already starting to show. 

“It's nice to see you too, Y/N.” He replied, a small smile forming on his lips as you both started catching up, having small talk from after finishing high school to your plans for the future, that's until you both stumbled on the topic about your love lifes. The whole time you kept talking with Ricky, his friend would observe you both, quietly downing the liquid remaining in the cup as he heard you and Ricky converse with ease.

“Oh, I almost forgot to introduce you both.” Ricky interrupted the conversation you were both so immersed in, turning to the boy who was too busy eyeing the liquid in the cup. “This is Gunwook, he's not as mean as he looks.” Ricky added as he patted Gunwook on the back, causing the younger to look up, already seeming lost due to his small distraction. “It's nice to meet you, I'm Y/N.” You introduce yourself, seeing how the younger’s cheeks become a bit flushed from embarrassment.

“I-it’s nice to meet you too, I'm Gunwook but you already know my name thanks to Ricky.” Gunwook stuttered slightly, his speech becoming a bit slurred due to how embarrassed he seemed. It didn't surprise you at all to see your friend being gone yet again to greet more guests, leaving you with the two boys standing in front of you.

The three of you continued talking, trying to keep the conversation going by discussing random topics, some which made sense and some that didn't make sense at all. Every time you and Ricky would exchange eye contact he’d get more touchy, his free hand lingering onto your skin, fingers gently caressing your arm to his hand moving lower to your waist. It made your heart flutter with the way his fingers pressed against the fabric of your dress, his touch felt nice but yet addicting. 

It had you secretly pressing your thighs together, trying to hide how embarrassingly wet you got just by listening to Ricky talking and Gunwook witnessed it all, watching you both but already devouring you by keeping his eyes on you. 

He watched the way your body tensed up as Ricky moved his hand underneath your dress, groping your ass as his nails digged into the soft flesh, leaning in and whispering the filthiest things unimaginable, your legs completely turning into jelly as he managed to convince you to ‘have a bit of fun’ with the both of them.

You were almost certain that you'd get caught due to how loud your moans were getting. Your dress was long discarded onto the floor, only leaving Gunwook and Ricky fully dressed. The both of them already had two fingers inside of you, thrusting them in and out as your thighs tensed and your toes curled due to the double penetration. 

“You look so pretty like this, princess…look at how you're taking our fingers so well.” Ricky praised as he pressed his lips against your neck, starting to leave gentle kisses along your skin, causing goosebumps to form all over your body. 

Your hands desperately gripped at the bed sheets as Gunwook sped up his movements, his fingers sliding in and out of you faster as you tried not to squirm. Your whole body felt like it was on fire, their fingers not slowing down as they sank deeper inside with how perfectly you were spread out for them, your chest heaving as your pussy desperately clenched around the digits, coating them with your wetness.

“Shit, look at her. Look how tight she is.” Gunwook groaned as he pulled out his fingers and slapped your clit a few times, causing you to cry out from the slight pain as he pushed his fingers in and started to thrust them in and out of you again. “Such a fucking slut, can't keep her legs closed even if she wanted to.” Gunwook said, his fingers speeding up as Ricky shifted his attention from you to Gunwook, watching how the younger moved his fingers. You were becoming a mess, the pleasure too much for you to handle, causing you to cum. 

Their fingers got coated with your juices and you watched how Ricky pulled his fingers out and licked them clean, a small hum leaving past his lips as he savored the taste. Gunwook pulled his fingers out and stared at how your juices were sticking against his skin. 

As much as he wanted to suck them clean, he didn’t do that. Instead he leaned above you and brought them closer to your face, watching how you eagerly parted your lips just to get a taste. He chuckled and pushed them in your mouth, and you eagerly sucked and licked them clean as the older watched you both.

“You’re that desperate to taste yourself?” Gunwook questioned and you nodded, too occupied to give him a proper answer as your tongue swirled around his digits, he wasn’t surprised how needy you were with the way you looked at him while still having his fingers in your mouth. 

He let you suck on them for a few more seconds then pulled them out of your mouth, causing you to whine in frustration but got quickly cut off when his lips pressed against yours, while gently grabbing your chin and tilting your head up, deepening the kiss.

Gunwook’s lips collided perfectly with yours, the way he kissed was both gentle and rough at the same time, his lips were so soft it made you feel addicted to them. You were too immersed into the kiss to notice when Ricky undressed, already rubbing the tip of his cock against your hole and making you more wet. He slowly pushed inside, the way your walls sucked him in made him groan while you moaned against Gunwook’s lips.

“So good for us, princess…you’re taking me so well.” Ricky praised as soon as he bottomed out, trying to keep his hips still as he let you adjust to his length. Gunwook pulled away from your lips, allowing you to take a breath as he leaned down and nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck, starting to leave kisses along your skin.

Ricky started moving his hips, his thrusts slow as he watched how your face contorted from the pleasure. He put his hands on your hips and squeezed them gently, then moved them all over your body, his touch being gentle as if you were made out of porcelain, as if he was scared he’ll break you with just one touch.

You were slowly starting to feel lost from the way the two boys were treating you, the way they were touching you all over, it was like heaven for you. “You're so fucking pretty…so pretty for us…” Ricky said as he kept thrusting, his grip on you got slightly tighter as he pushed his cock deep inside you, causing you to feel full from it.

“Our pretty girl, yeah?” Ricky asked as he sped up the pace, watching as you struggled to speak. You were already becoming a moaning mess, struggling to keep the noises from slipping past your lips as Gunwook moved his lips lower, closer to your breasts. His kisses weren't aggressive, he was being careful and gentle when kissing your skin.

“So perfect…” Gunwook mumbled as his lips latched onto one of your nipples, starting to suck slowly as he flicked his tongue gently against the hardened bud, causing you to clench around Ricky's cock. You felt like you were on cloud 9, the way Ricky was fucking you while Gunwook was too busy having his lips attached onto your nipple, swirling his tongue around it as he sucked it in more, causing you to moan.

Ricky kept thrusting at a fast pace, the tip of his cock perfectly hitting against your g-spot, noises of skin slapping against skin filling the room along with your moans and the occasional grunts he let out every now and then. He could tell how close you were by the way you clenched around him and the way your moans were getting more high pitched.

It made him feel so lightheaded, his whole body becoming sweaty and heated up as he neared the edge. His pace became sloppy, as he thrusted a few more times before he came inside, painting your walls white. That was enough to push you over the edge as well, cumming and clenching around his cock, milking every single drop out of him as you both started panting. 

He slowly pulled out after a few minutes, causing you to whimper from the loss of being full. Ricky watched as his cum started oozing out of you, the thick liquid slowly dripping down onto the bed sheets. He was fascinated by it, almost as if he was hypnotized by it. That was until he noticed Gunwook finally moving his lips away from your now swollen nipple, spit and bite marks on one breast, the other one untouched. 

Ricky moved to your side and cupped your cheek with one hand, as he leaned in and kissed you, finally getting a chance to devour you as soon as you kissed him back. He was much more gentle compared to Gunwook, taking his time with you as the kiss became more passionate and gentle, full of love even. 

Gunwook slowly undressed, watching how Ricky devoured your lips as if you'd disappear the moment he stopped kissing you. As soon as he was done undressing he slotted himself between your legs and watched as you and Ricky kept kissing.

It was hot to watch you and Ricky kiss as if you were both in heat, but Gunwook didn't mind how desperate you were for the both of them at all. After a few minutes Ricky broke the kiss and quickly nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck, his lips latching onto your skin as he started sucking, causing you to moan.

Gunwook grabbed one of your legs and lifted it over his shoulder, then spread your other leg with one hand, giving himself full access to your stuffed pussy. He wrapped his free hand around the base of his cock and stroked it a few times, then positioned the tip at your entrance, your eyes now fixed onto his cock.

‘How the fuck will it fit?’ You thought as you watched how he dragged his tip up and down your puffy folds, purposely teasing and prolonging the pleasure you desperately needed. It was no surprise about his size: he was huge. His cock looked thick enough to split you in half by the way he was holding it, and the few veins along his length made it look prettier.

Gunwook kept teasing you for a few minutes, watching how annoyed you became the more he dragged his tip along your folds, occasionally tapping your clit with it as you whined from the painful teasing. It didn't take long for him to reposition the tip of his cock at your entrance, slowly pushing inside as he groaned from how tight you were, while you moaned from the size.

He kept pushing in despite you clenching around his length, trying your best to make him fit fully inside you. After a bit he finally managed to fit inside, his hips pressed against yours as he moved his hand away from his cock, placing it right at your belly, feeling the imprint of his cock pressing against your skin.

“Fuck…you're so tight, bunny. Barely fitting me in…” Gunwook said as he started thrusting slowly, his cock slipping in and out of your puffy folds. His fingers pressed against your thigh, gripping the soft flesh as he kept thrusting, being careful not to get you overstimulated.

Meanwhile Ricky kept sucking on your neck, moving his lips from one spot to another, your skin getting covered with hickeys that seem impossible to cover up, one hand moving to your breasts as he started playing with them, giving equal attention to both while he moved his other hand to your hair, running his fingers through it as he tugged at your nipples, weak whimpers slipping past your lips as your hands gripped the bed sheets.

Gunwook sped up the pace, his hips slapping against yours a bit harder as he kept his hand on your belly, feeling how your walls gripped his cock tightly, making you feel more fuller than Ricky did. His thrusts were fast, his cock stretching your already used pussy beyond its limits as he pushed in deep, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix with every thrust.

His eyes were fixed onto your face, watching how your eyes rolled back, your lips parted as you let out the prettiest moans, your hands bunching up the thin bed sheets as your tits bounced every time he thrusted roughly inside, it was the most perfect sight for him, he could watch it for hours and never get bored.

Ricky finally moved his lips away from your neck, admiring the hickeys he left while Gunwook kept thrusting, his pace not faltering as he kept moving his hips, the sounds of skin slapping against skin getting louder with each thrust. He kept hitting your g-spot and you kept clenching around him, your thighs tensing up and toes curling from how good and full you felt from his cock.

Gunwook noticed how close you were with the way you kept clenching around him, moans slipping past your lips as you looked so blissed out. He kept the same pace, as he moved his hand away from your belly and moved it lower, letting his fingers hover above your pussy. He watched your face for a few seconds, seeing the way you were far gone to even try and form a coherent sentence.

He let his fingers brush against your clit, letting out a small hiss from the way your pussy squeezed his cock tightly, desperate to milk him. He placed his fingers against your clit and started rubbing it gently, a high pitched moan escaping from your lips as you clenched around him one more time, your orgasm hitting you harder than anticipated as you soaked his length with your juices.

“Shit…just like that, bunny.” Gunwook praised as he came inside, letting out a groan as he emptied his load, his cum mixing with Ricky’s as he kept thrusting and rubbing your clit. You felt tired and weak, but also satisfied from the way you were filled with both their cum. His pace slowed down, his thrusts becoming deeper as he pushed in and out of you.

The both of them watched as their cum oozed out of you with every thrust, Ricky couldn’t look away as his eyes were glued on your body, seeing the way your chest heaved as you started panting, your face flushed and your whole body glistening with sweat, it made you look breathtaking. 

Gunwook thrusted a few more times and pulled out, then pushed your leg away from his shoulder, letting it fall against the soft mattress. He quickly laid down on his stomach and spread your legs, watching as more cum gushed out of your used hole. He wrapped his arms around your thighs, his hands gripping the soft flesh as he pulled you closer, burying his face between your legs as his lips latched onto your clit, starting to clean you up while you moaned once again from the added pleasure.

That’s how you knew that you were in for a long night with the two boys…

[arcane-vagabond]

I love that you’re writing for Tyler! I would love to say that I have an idea for you but all I can think of is something with a shy and/or insecure reader. I don’t remember if you wrote for plus size!readers, so shy/insecure reader is another fave.

Maybe reader is someone Tyler and the Wranglers save during a tornado? My mind is empty of ideas rn, sorry!

First of all, I'm always down to write a plus size!reader as I, myself, am a plus sized girlie and quite frankly? We need more love.

Imagine you're a member of another storm chasing crew, kind of like Kate, but less exploitative of the victims of these storms. Your crew does a lot of the same stuff Tyler and his crew does, except you aren't shooting off fireworks into the funnels because hello??

But you're stopped at a gas station one day while your friends/crew stock up on snacks for the road and hit the bathrooms one last time. You're out surveying the skies, trying to decide which storm is worth your while when that cocky sonofagun from the rival team comes sauntering up to you. You think nothing of it.

Of course you found Tyler Owens to be extremely attractive, you'd have to be blind not to, in all honesty. But you had resigned yourself to the fact that this Adonis of a man would never look twice at you, at least not in the way you wanted him to. So you accepted that your crush was most definitely one sided.

"Looks like chances are good for some kind of action today," he drawled. You glanced over at him, eyeing the way his hands rested on his hips before blowing out a breath.

"Yeah," you muttered, tearing your gaze away and back toward the sky. There was a heavy pause between the two of you, and you shifted on your feet uneasily.

"I hope that team captain of yours hasn't said too many bad things 'bout me," he chuckled, though he didn't sound amused in the slightest.

"What do you mean?" You asked, turning to look at him fully now. A frown tugged on his lips as he peered at you from the corner of his eyes.

"Just would hate for a pretty girl like you to think the worst of me is all," he shrugged. "Especially when I'd like to see more of her."

Your heart stopped. Surely he wasn't be serious. This had to be a joke, right? There's no way someone that looked like him would be interested in someone like you.

Right?

A look of uncertainty crawled onto his face the longer you went without saying anything.

"I mean, if you're not interested, that's fine, too," he said, the words coming out in almost a jumbled mess with how quickly he spoke. "I mean, I've just seen you around, and I think you're real pretty and all that. I just wanted to try my luck and see if you'd be interested in grabbing a drink sometimes, but maybe I'm overstepping and-"

He blew out a breath, his cheeks tinged pink with embarrassment as he rubbed the back of his neck, avoiding your gaze.

"I'm just gonna shut up now," he grumbled, turning to head back towards the large crowd.

"You wanna go on a date with me?" You asked, voice quiet, and you were surprised that he heard you. He turned back to look at you, a twinkle in his eyes as his lips quirked upwards.

"Was I not being obvious enough about it?" He teased, shoving his hands into his pockets. You heard Ricky, your team lead, call your name. You waved over at him to let him know you were on your way before looking back at Tyler, a grin playing at the corner of your lips.

"I gotta run," you told him, watching the crestfallen look that covered his face. You bit your lip and stepped closer to him, his pretty, green eyes widening slightly at the proximity. "But if you want, you can buy me a drink the next time you see me?"

"Yeah?" He asked, a grin breaking out across his face. You bit your bottom lip, looking up at him shyly through your lashes.

"Sure thing, cowboy," you giggled, spinning on your heel and making your way back towards your team.

[theapangea]

Omg do you think he gets jealous easily?? Like if someone is flirting with innocent!reader and she doesn't really get it and thinks theyre being nice and like Lip comes over and just starts talking dirty to her or something.

Ok ok ok I think Lip is not like jealous jealous. He's pretty confident in himself and may not care if other dudes hit on you per se but he is definitely the type of dude that would say "He can't fuck you like I can". ughhh I love him sm

This how I think the situation would play out...enjoy cuties <3

The Alibi is loud tonight, louder than normal and here you are sitting all alone because Lip has to use the bathroom. When duty calls, duty calls he laughed before placing a quick peck to your forehead. You baby the cold beer that sits between your palms. Lip mainly got it for you to fit into the bar scene but knows he will probably be the one drinking it.

Your eyes follow around the small room, card game in the corner, a group playing pool, a quick smile from Kevin as he keeps a close eye on you while Lip is away. Feet lightly tapping the bar stool to the faint music you can barely hear over the talking, yelling, shouting.

"Hello there, pretty lady," an unfamiliar voice speaks to the right of you, turning you head to meet with an unkept man about 30 or so years old. "Mind if I sit?" He questions, gesturing at one of the empty bar stools.

"Sure," Your voice is calm, a quick smile peaking through.

While situating himself on the stool, "So what's a pretty girl like you doing all alone?"

"Waiting I guess."

"I'd never keep you waiting." His is quick and confident in his comment. A smirk dancing across his face as he fingers reach out to graze your forearm.

"I see you made a friend." Lip's voice sends a shiver down your spine. The volume breaking through the loudness of the space. His arm instantly finding its place over your shoulders.

Smiling up at him, "Yeah, yeah...this is...um?" Realizing you actually don't even know who you are talking too.

"Ricky."

"Ricky." You repeat back to Lip.

"Got it," His thumbs wipes his bottom lip. "So Ricky you plan on fucking my girl tonight?" He leans against the table, his arm slightly pulling you with him.

Lip's comment sending blood through your ears, the heat rising to your face as Ricky chokes on his alcohol.

Lip continues, "Because you and I both know you'd never be able to fuck her like I can so..." He nods his head, signaling for the man to leave.

Ricky taking the hint as he tilts his glass towards Lip, moving to the other side of the bar.

"Lip." You lightly hit his chest, the embarrassment coating you like a blanket.

"What?" Lip laughs, "You know it's true."

~~~

ok just a little bit of what may happen. I do think here is a time and place for a Jealous Lip which is so HAWT so maybe I will write something about it -- let me know.

a little kiss for you for supporting me!!

[starhoppin]

pick a picture; who is your soulmate

pile 1 -> pile 2 -> pile 3

disclaimer: this is a general reading! these messages may not fit everyone. please take what resonates and leave the rest.

「 pile one 」

[personality] queen of swords, queen of pentacles rv, ten of pentacles this person is very intellectual. in fact they might tend to overanalyze and overthink things/events/situations that have happened in their life. this can be a burden for them. however, i'm also seeing that they're a bit of a dreamer. specifically, they're someone who struggles with grounding themselves in the present. they may have a lot of ideas that they want to put out into the world, but they have a difficult time turning their fantasies/ideas into something tangible. they're driven and optimistic. they're someone who always views the cup as "half full" rather than half empty. they know that as long as they work towards their true desires, they will be able to obtain them.

[appearance] long dark hair (both men and women), distinct nose (specifically large noses), strong jawline, might like to wear jewelry (specifically necklaces - may like to layer them), native or asian descent.

[love language] the mapmaker of destiny, gaia's garden i'm getting for some that your soulmate may be into art - specifically painting or drawing? they might like to give you those types of gifts. they might also like to give you flowers. consequently, their main love language might be gift-giving.

[potential zodiac signs] lots of fire sign energy - specifically aries as well as leo placements. i'm also getting strong pisces energy. they might also have gemini placements.

[songs that may resonate] f*kin' perfect - p!nk, mr. loverman - ricky montgomery, falling - chase atlantic

「 pile two 」

[personality] eight of cups, death (cb: six of swords), page of cups this person is a dreamer - some might describe them as someone with their "head in the clouds." i'm getting the image of them thinking of something happy, but when someone asks them what they're smiling about, they just shake their head and say never mind. they have innocent/puppy/golden retriever energy. they're like a bundle of sunshine. i wouldn't be surprised if this was someone with a lot of friends or was described as the life of the party. however, this person might have a fear of change or asking for help. they may seem they're strong and independent, but they might feel the need to do everything by themselves.

[appearance] for some, their soulmate may dress in a boho aesthetic? your soulmate may have either dark hair or blond (like i'm getting either they have super dark hair, or super blond- almost white hair. nothing really in between). if they're a guy, they may have facial hair.

[love language] the lady of the gift, the horse king rv this person's love language is definitely gift-giving. i'm not seeing anything in particular, but i'm getting that they'll buy things that they think you will like on a whim. literally like anything that reminds them of you. also their love language could be acts of service. they will want to spoil you - which, in their mind, means giving you "the princess treatment." this is the kind of person who will open the car door for you, cook you dinner to make your day easier, etc.

[potential zodiac signs] lots of water sign energy - specifically scorpio; however, they may also be a cancer. i'm also getting heavy aries energy. they might have some aquarius placements too.

[songs that may resonate] golden hour - jvke, once upon a december - liz callaway, battlefield - svrcina

「 pile three 」

[personality] king of swords, knight of swords, nine of wands your soulmate is very logical. when it comes to a decision of any kind, they carefully weigh the facts beforehand. when they have to make a choice, they're very practical - meaning they might go against their true desires if they deem that route "illogical." this person values fairness and truth above all else. this person may be a bit rigid when it comes to their plans. they like having control and may get frustrated when their plans go astray or things don't unfold exactly how they planned. they may take on more than they can handle because they're eager to get to their end goal. they may struggle with burnout - specifically because they tend to ignore signs that they should rest. however, their dedication and resiliency translates into your love life in a positive way; this is the type of person who will refuse to give up on you (both in terms of pursuing you in the beginning and throughout your relationship). they will always want to work through problems and they aren't the type to brush things under the rug.

[appearance] if your soulmate is a man, they may have dark hair as well as facial hair. if they're a woman, they have long hair - blonde or reddish. they may also like to experiment with makeup - such as trying out different looks or they may like to wear unique eye makeup. in general, they may like to wear hats.

[love language] the lady of the gift, the hawk prince this person loves to give gifts - in particular, things that you may be eyeing. if you look at something while you're out shopping but put it back, they will make a mental note to go back and buy it. they pay attention to what you like/dislike because they want to give you thoughtful gifts that show that they care.

[potential zodiac signs] heavy water sign energy - specifically pisces and cancer. some air sign energy as well - particularly libra. they may also have some aries placements.

[songs that may resonate] enchanted - taylor swift, slow dancing in the dark - joji, dive - ed sheeran

tarot decks used in this reading: cirque du tarot & wisdom of the hidden realms oracle cards

[als-notebook]

silence

Misha seeks out a conversation with a friend. (I attempted to write this very ambiguous. You can view this as platonic or romantic.)

Sundays always felt slow, and the rain made the day feel even more empty. Somehow, Misha Bachnyskyi found himself walking over to his friend’s house in the rain with a hood over his head. When he got there, he noted that his friend’s mother’s car was not parked in the driveway, meaning she was probably out working, and his friend was home alone.

Misha almost hesitated to reach out and knock on the door. Why had he come here, really? He hadn’t even asked him if he could visit. But surely he wouldn’t mind, right? Something about today felt gloomy, and it wasn’t just the gray skies. Misha felt down, and he wasn’t sure why, but what he did know is that he needed a friend today.

Finally, Misha tapped his knuckles against the wood. Knock, knock, knock. He took a step back, waiting for just one moment before Noel Gruber opened the door a crack, peering out. When he spotted Misha, he opened the door completely, smoothing out his clothes and smiling a little. He hadn’t expected the visit. “Misha,” Noel said to him, “a pleasant surprise, really. What are you doing here? You walked over here in the rain?”

The walk from Misha’s house to Noel’s house wasn’t very long, perhaps a few minutes, but maybe it was still a bit concerning that Misha had made the walk in the rain without even notifying Noel he was visiting. “H..Hi,” Misha stammered out after a few seconds—he didn’t really think about what to say. “Ahh… Well… I just wanted to hang out, I guess.” It wasn’t the entire truth, but it wasn’t completely false either. 

Noel frowned. “Are you… sure? You look kind of upset.” Misha sighed. Great. He knew something was up.

“Aghh… I don’t know. I just… I started feeling kind of sad. I just let my feet take me here. I guess I just need a friend.” Misha wasn’t usually open and honest like that. Something about Noel felt… safe. Like he could tell him anything and he wouldn’t judge him.

Noel felt honored to be that safe space for Misha. He could have gone to Ricky, or texted Talya, or kept it all to himself; but he went to Noel. His feet took him to Noel. Still, Noel concealed how glad he was. He stepped out of the way to let Misha in. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”

Misha stepped in behind Noel, threw his shoes off, and took a vague glance around. He sort of slouched like he was trying to get his wet hoodie as far away from him as he possibly could, uncomfortable. He spotted a coat rack right by the door, and lifted his arms up and behind himself, pulling the soaked jacket over his head. He pinched the hood with his index finger and thumb and hung it up as he finally replied, “I just want to… talk.”

Noel nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, okay. We can talk.” He smiled; perhaps it was a bit crooked. He wanted to do this right, he really wanted to show Misha he’d support him. Don’t overthink it, Noel. “Do you wanna go in my room?”

“Sure,” Misha said with a shrug. He didn’t mind where they went, really. As long as he could  talk. “Lead the way.”

As per usual, Noel led Misha to his room. It was quite dim in there; the big light was off, and the only things lighting it up was the dim light from the window and a pretty, vintage-looking lamp next to Noel’s bed. Misha recognized it—Noel had thrifted it a while ago. He had been so thrilled about it, Misha recalled. Something about it being super cheap.

“Here,” Noel said as he began to move a few pieces of clothing off his bed, “Come sit.” He sat on the edge of the bed, beckoning for Misha to sit next to him. Misha smirked playfully. He’d been here several times before. He might as well live here.

“Nah,” Misha said before flopping onto the bed face first. “I think I’ll lay right here.” Noel was taken aback, and then laughed. “Sure,” he replied. Noel hesitated; would it be weird if he laid next to him? Surely not. They were friends, right? Being friends with guys as a gay man was hard. Most of the time, they’d think he liked them if he did something that could just barely be interpreted as romantic. But Misha was different. He didn’t mind the friendly affection; in fact, he actively seeked it out. Unlike with friends Noel had in the past, they would hug and sit close to one another very frequently. It was nice. 

So, finally, Noel laid next to Misha, their shoulders touching on the small bed. Noel turned his head to face Misha, and Misha lifted his head to face Noel. They smiled at each other.

Misha flipped over onto his back, now, and leaned closer to Noel. They shared a few moments of warm silence. Noel wanted to give Misha the chance to speak first.

Finally, Misha took a breath.

“I like the rain. It reminds me of home. When my mother and I would snuggle up under a blanket, when she would tell me stories and read me poems.”

A beat.

“Do you like the rain, Noel?”

Noel thought about it for a moment. “Sometimes.”

He paused, and then elaborated, “It can be poetic, really… It makes a good metaphor. Sometimes it’s harsh; thrashing around trees, beating down on your skin… sometimes it leaves behind a bright rainbow.”

“Sometimes it’s calming, listening to raindrops hit the window,” Misha continued, and left it at that. The silence between them revealed the sound of rain falling onto Noel’s window.

Misha glanced at Noel again. The other boy stared at the ceiling, appearing comfortable. Misha sort of laughed–although it was more like a sharp exhale out of his nose. “Sick of this sappy shit,” he said jokingly, before flopping directly on top of Noel, catching the poet off guard.

Noel chuckled, “What are you doing? Don’t you find this a little weird?” he said, before quickly clarifying, “I mean, not that I mind.”

“Nah. It’s just like… horizontal hug, no?” This sent Noel into a laughing fit that quickly ended after he snorted and got embarrassed.

Misha snickered. But soon, their laughter dissipated, the silence filled again by the sound of the rain. Misha rested his head on its side on top of Noel’s chest. His heartbeat was somewhat… relaxing.

Of course, their conversation inevitably turned sappy again, for what are two writers if not full of love?

“I miss my mom,” Misha said softly, somberly. Noel placed a hand on his head as a comforting gesture, still silent. “I miss my country.”

He thought for a moment before he spoke again. “It’s kind of stupid,” he began, “but I keep thinking about that question I got a while ago.” Noel hummed as a response. “The one that said something like, if you could go back to Ukraine right now, but couldn’t talk to the choir ever again, would you do it?”

Misha sighed. He was about to get unbearably sweet, but he couldn’t help it. “As much as I miss my home… I meant what I said. Really. I want to go back as soon as I can, but if it means never talking to the only people who were ever nice to me here again? I don’t think I could do that, you know? Is that such a crime?”

Noel looked down at the boy on his chest. He adored the unusual sweetness from his friend. Knowing Misha really did care about the choir, about him—it felt nice. Absent-mindedly, he twirled his curls with his fingers. Misha didn’t seem to mind. “I think that’s really lovely, Misha.”

And once again, they were left in silence, a common theme of this afternoon. But it wasn’t anything uncomfortable—in fact, it was quite the opposite. It was nice they could lay unspeaking and still enjoy one another’s presence and company. That was a kind of closeness that was hard to come by, especially in Uranium.

But all silences must come to an end, right?

“Noel?” Misha said, quietly and softly, as if beckoning for his attention. Noel continued playing with his hair, looking down at him. “Hmm?” 

For a few moments, Misha was silent, the only sound from him was his steady breaths. Finally, he spoke.

“I love you.”

Noel was taken aback by the statement. A boy lying on his chest against his heartbeat—it was undoubtedly intimate. Was this a platonic sentiment? Was it something deeper, more romantic? Noel wasn’t sure.

But either way, no matter what Misha truly did mean, Noel knew his answer.

“I love you, too.”

[thehereticdiaries]

I Make You (You Make Me): Chapter One

Summary: After auditioning for a backup dancer position for the idol group Enhypen, you do the polite thing and shake everyone's hands before you leave. But when you make contact with one of the members, your soul mark burns Warnings: This chapter is literally all fluff

Series Masterlist

The HYBE building was absolutely daunting. The sun reflected off the glass and metal, making it difficult to look at. You took a deep breath, swallowing your nerves and wiping your sweaty palms on your joggers before stepping into the cool air of the lobby. You approached the woman typing furiously behind the front desk, her glasses sitting on the edge of her nose.

“Hello, I’m looking for the Enhypen auditions?” You politely greeted the older woman.

“Photo ID and audition invitation.” She didn’t even look up from her computer to address you, causing your anxiety to spike again. You handed her the requested documents with shaky hands. Her sharp eyes scanned over your ID and letter, then to a list of names taped to her desk. She returned your documents and provided a visitor tag. “Take the elevator to the right. The studio is on the third level, number 307.” 

You mumbled a ‘thank you’ and followed her directions to the dance studio. You were among 20 candidates for the backup dancer position for the swiftly approaching comeback. You stood in line and focused solely on keeping your breathing steady. It was your turn after what felt like an eternity of waiting (it was only 15 minutes). You stood in the center of the room facing four men sitting in chairs and holding clipboards. You recognized two of them as members of Enhypen, although you couldn’t remember their names. The other two must be the lead choreographer and manager. They were the names on the audition invite.

“Hello, I am Y/N L/N, and I will be performing my own choreography to Mirage by Lindsey Stirling,” you introduced yourself with a bow. They nodded and began the track, which they had queued up along with the other candidates’ songs. You took your position and emptied your mind, just like you did before every competition. You put everything you had into the dance. You panted as you relaxed from your final position. 

“You said you made your own choreography?” One of the Enhypen members asked with a tilt of his head. Shit, what was his name? Ricky? Ricky sounded almost right. You nodded.

“Yes, this was for my final competition right before I graduated from university.”

“Did you go to school for dance?” The oldest of the four men chimed in. You had to assume he was the manager.

“No, actually, I have a teaching degree. I was planning to teach Korean and English literature. But I did competitive dance for a little under ten years,” you explained, fidgeting with your fingers. You weren’t expecting to be asked any questions.

“So what made you apply for this position?” The other Enhypen member furrowed his eyebrows. 

“To be honest, I haven’t had much luck finding a school willing to hire me, since I’m only 22 and a foreigner,” you sighed. “I saw the ad online, and figured there was no harm in applying.”

“If you don’t mind my asking, are those bands on your fingers your soul mark?” The manager pointed to your hands. You looked down at the bands of solid black circling the base of seven of your fingers.

“Yes, they are. And no, I’m not sure if it means I have seven soulmates or if they’re all tied to one,” you answered the question you knew would be the follow-up. The manager nodded, making a note on the paper in front of him.

“Thank you for coming in, we will be in touch to let you know if we have decided to pick you for the position,” the manager stated with a final nod in your direction. You thanked and shook the hands of the manager and choreographer. When your hand connected with the Enhypen member to the choreographer’s right, the band on your left pinky burned. You yelped, yanking your hand from the young man’s grip to clutch your mark. You rubbed your pinky to soothe the sting, your motions coming to a stop when the black band slowly morphed to a pale purple.

“Ni-ki, are you okay?” You looked up to him staring at everything in the room with his jaw dropped. 

“Oh, my god, I’m so sorry! Did I hurt you?” Ni-ki dropped his eyes back to you. He suddenly held your face with both hands to pull you closer to his face, causing you to squeak and flush a light pink. He seemed to be analyzing your features, flicking his gaze over your hair, your cheeks, and your lips before landing on your eyes.

“Ni-ki, what on earth has gotten into you?” The manager asked incredulously. 

“Her eyes are blue,” he muttered while running a thumb across the skin under your eyes.

“Oh… oh! You got colors! You found your soulmate,” the other member grinned and shook the youngest by his shoulders. Ni-ki rolled his eyes and reluctantly released you from his grip. You shook yourself out of your daze.

“Sorry, I’m probably holding up the auditions. I’ll wait outside until everything is finished, then we can talk.” You bowed clumsily and stepped back in the hallway, missing the curious look from the cat-eyed member and the longing from Ni-ki. They knew you were right, though, so they didn’t protest. You sat on the floor a few doors down from the audition studio. There were still seven people that still needed to go, so you pulled out your phone to google the Enhypen members. You identified the other member in the studio as the leader, Jungwon. You fell down a rabbit hole of interviews and fan compilations in an attempt to memorize all of their names and faces.

“Y/N?” You jumped at the sudden intrusion. Jungwon had poked his head out of the studio to let you know they were done, but he was now stifling his laughter. 

“You guys are done already?” You checked the time and sure enough, almost a half hour had passed. You followed Jungwon back into the studio, sitting on the floor in a small triangle with the idols while their manager, Minjun, observed from his chair. You and Ni-ki immediately dove into a quiet conversation, each of you wanting to learn more about your soulmate. Jungwon looked at you with that same curious expression as when you left after your audition. 

“I have something I want to test,” he interrupted. You turned to him, eyebrows raised. He hesitated for a split second before gently intertwining your hands. You winced when you felt the burning on your soul mark again, this time on your left middle finger. The three of you watched as the band changed from black to a rosy pink.

“How come yours is a different color than mine?” Ni-ki questioned. You shrugged, unsure of the answer yourself.

“I don’t know. I guess I’ll figure it out over time.” You looked up from your newly colored mark to Jungwon, who was typing quickly on his phone. “How did you know?” 

“Your emotions,” he started and dropped his phone into his lap to return his attention to you. “I have the shared emotions soulmark. I felt how nervous you’ve been today, especially when you introduced yourself and your song. I had a feeling even before you gave Ni-ki colors.”

“I assume you told the other boys,” Minjun quipped. Jungwon nodded. You were very happy you decided to look them up earlier. “I’ll be back, then. I need to gather some paperwork for Y/N to fill out.” 

“You think the others are my soulmates, too?” You pondered after the door closed behind Minjun. 

“It’s definitely possible. I’ve heard a couple other groups share a soulmate,” Jungwon noted. “ITZY and P1Harmony have gone public with their soulmates. TXT, Xikers, and Aespa are still private with theirs, but they’ve told some other idol groups.”

“Oh wow, I didn’t know so many–” You were cut off by the door slamming open. You clutched a hand over your heart, shouting a Jesus fucking Christ in English.

“AH!!” Jake beamed and pointed at you. He turned in circles, almost too excited to pick one thing to look at. 

“Show her, dumbass!” Someone teased from the hallway. Jake turned and moved closer to you then lifted part of his shirt. Across his left hip bone, in bold black letters, was the phrase “Jesus fucking Christ”. 

“I am so sorry!” You hid your face in your hands. “Ugh, why did I curse?! I wish I said something nicer.”

“It’s okay,” Jake chuckled and wedged his way between you and Jungwon. “It’s easy enough to cover, plus it’s funny as hell.” The other four members filed into the studio. Sunoo froze by the door to stare at you. 

“Alright!” You clapped to get everyone’s attention (which was already on you anyway). “My soulmark is physical, so I need everyone to touch my hand or something. Oh, and tell me what your soulmarks are.” The first to step up was Heeseung. He pulled the collar of his shirt down to reveal your initials printed underneath his collarbone. Heeseung changed your right pointer finger's band red while Jake turned your left pointer finger's pink, same as Jungwon.

“I have a red string connecting my thumb to your chest,” Sunghoon grinned and ran the thumb with his string across your cheekbone. The band on your right middle finger turned the same shade of red as Heeseung’s. The burning was intense, but you needed to confirm all of the bonds. 

“You glow for me.” Sunoo was still entranced by the pulsing gold light surrounding your body. He simply patted your hair before sitting between Sunghoon and Ni-ki. Your left ring finger’s band changed to pale purple. The last to approach was Jay, who sat right in front of you.

“I don’t know what my soulmark is,” he admitted. You nodded and held your hands out to him. He took them into his own, changing the band on your right ring finger red. His smile dropped ever so slightly. Nothing changed for him. 

“Nothing?” Jay shook his head and you smiled sadly. “I’m sorry…”

“It’s not your fault.” He started to pull his hands away, but paused when he looked at your palms. They were a deep, forest green. Jay’s eyebrows pinched together in concentration. He ran his fingers down your forearm, a trail of green following his touch. 

“What do the different colors mean?” Jake peeked over Jay’s shoulder, who was still running his fingers across any patch of exposed skin in fascination, smiling so hard his eyes were almost closed.

“I’m not really sure,” you shrugged. Sunghoon tapped his chin. You could practically see the cogs turning in his head.

“Maybe it shows different types of bonds,” he started. “Not all soul bonds are the same, after all.”

“That’s true,” you agreed. “I’ll probably figure out what the colors mean as I get to know all of you.” The door opened again and Minjun stepped back into the studio, tablet in hand.

“So?” The elder probed, one eyebrow arched. You held up your hands to show off your now-colorful fingers. “I can’t say I’m surprised. For now, I just need you to sign a standard NDA. I have to discuss more specifics with the managers of the other groups that share a soulmate.” Minjun handed you the tablet. You barely skimmed the agreement before signing and dating the form. 

“Is this going to affect my chances of getting the backup dancer position?” You asked as you handed the tablet back to the manager. 

“That is part of the specifics I need to ask about. If you’d like to spend time together, please do so here or at their dorms until we do a security sweep of your home.” Minjun tucked the tablet under his arm and left the studio once more. 

“Let’s go to the dorms. We can order food and get to know each other better,” Jungwon suggested and stood to grab his bag.

“Dude, we just left them to come here!” Jake groaned. “Why didn’t you just bring her to us?”

“You know Minjun wouldn’t let us without confirming that she is actually everyone’s soulmate.” Jungwon held the door open and gestured to the hallway. You followed the boys as they made their way back to the dorms.

Permanent Taglist: @furfoxsake22 @babygirlskz98 @miniverse-zen

Series Taglist: Open, send an ask or comment to be added

[emsprovisions]

I know I am being greedy here but,

3. I can't seem to take neither my eyes, nor my mind off of you, TK

8. being ur partner's mum's favorite.

from romance prompt please.

From this list of writing prompts that I am no longer accepting. Hello anon! Someone else has also asked for no. 3 so I will answer theirs :)

being ur partner's mum's favorite.

Carlos sits on the couch, his ankle crossed over his opposite knee and a beer in his hand as he watches his husband playing firefighter with action figures and a toy fire engine with their young sobrinos on the floor. They keep pausing because they want to hear TK’s stories from his firefighter days, since apparently–according to Six-and-eight-year-old Diego and Juliana–paramedics aren’t as cool. They giggle as TK keeps playfully correcting their terminology of the ladder truck and exactly how many inches of line they should start and Carlos’s heart just swells. 

“Ay, TK?” Carlos’s mom pops her head in from the backdoor, “Are you in here, mijo?”

“What do you need, Ma?” Carlos sits up, uncrossing his legs and making to get up.

“Oh, no, you stay right there, Carlitos. I need TK’s expertise.”

“It’s fine, babe, I could do with stretching my legs anyway,” TK smiles up at Carlos. He gets up, much to Diego and Juliana’s dismay, and promises he’ll be back. He purposely walks around the couch so he can pass Carlos, stooping to kiss the top of his head as he does so. 

After TK disappears, Carlos is left alone with his sobrinos, and they coax him into playing firefighter with him instead. But Tío TK does it better than Tío Carlos, evidently. 

When TK’s been gone for too long, and Carlos’s brother-in-law wanders in to check on his kids, Carlos stands up. 

“Have you seen TK?” He asks Ricardo as he approaches. 

“He’s out on the back porch,” Ricardo says, almost bitterly. “With your mom, and Tía Lucy, and my wife.”

“Uh, thanks,” Carlos says, looking at Ricky apprehensively before excusing himself in search of his husband. 

TK’s got a glass of sweet tea in his hand, slapping his knee, while Ana clings to his arm, gasping for breath. 

“No way!” She laughs. “Tonterías! That did not happen.”

“It did,” TK nods. “I swear it on my mother’s grave.”

TK looks up as the screen door swings shut and sees Carlos step out before anyone else. 

“Hey, baby!” TK calls. “Come join us.”

Carlos lingers by the door, watching TK fit in with his family so seamlessly. They’ve been married for nearly a year now, but sometimes it still surprises him that he has this. He not only gets to be himself, he gets to be himself around his family, and they are all enamored with TK, too. 

TK’s smiling at him, patting the empty seat beside him and Carlos smiles and slides onto the long bench beside his husband, an arm going around his shoulder and TK’s hand falling into place on top of his knee. 

“What did I interrupt?” Carlos asks. 

“Oh, I was just telling everyone about that call we got the other day, where the neighbors were having a domestic dispute and one of them threw pickle juice all over my patient and it turned out she’s allergic to pickles,” TK grins, catching Carlos up on the story. “Ana here doesn’t believe that we get calls as ridiculous as that all the time.”

“That’s because that’s impossible!” Ana scoffs. “Who’s allergic to pickles??”

“My patient, evidently,” TK smirks at her. 

Carlos laughs, “There’s a lot of stupid people in this world, Ana. You would not believe the absurdity of some of the calls I used to get under APD.”

“Babe, you get ridiculous cases now too,” TK reminds him. 

“Cuéntanos más de tus historias, TK.”

TK smiles warmly at Tía Lucy over in her blue adirondack chair in the deck before looking up to Carlos for help. 

“Tía wants to hear more of your stories,” Carlos tells him, looking up at his great aunt and the delight on her face. She can’t speak English, but she can mostly understand it, and joy and humor are universal languages anyways. 

TK launches into more funny stories from different calls before Ricardo comes outside with a screaming Diego, and it’s time for Ana to go home. 

Andrea takes TK inside and Carlos is tasked with helping Tía Lucy inside and to her chair in her room. 

“You have a sweet young man, Carlitos,” she tells him in Spanish. “Muy guapo y divertido.”

It’s not the first time she’s commented on TK. Honestly, Tía Lucy always fawns over Carlos’s husband to the point Carlos wonders if she doesn’t have some schoolgirl type crush on him. Carlos has no idea how TK charms everyone that comes into his orbit, he’s just happy he’s the lucky guy TK vowed forever with. 

“I think so too, Tía,” Carlos responds in Spanish, winking at her. 

They chat for a while longer before Tía Lucy says she’s tired. Carlos kisses her cheek and wishes her a goodnight. He wanders back out into the main room to find TK and his mom chatting in hushed voices on the couch. TK has his hand on Andrea’s arm, rubbing his thumb back and forth over her skin. She pulls him into a tight hug, then kisses his cheek and whispers something into his ear.

Carlos watches the scene unfold, feeling a little bad for interrupting. But before he can duck into the kitchen unnoticed, his mom catches sight of him. 

“Oh, Carlitos!” She pulls away from TK and wipes delicately at the skin beneath her eyes. 

“Hi, Mamá. Everything okay?” Carlos asks, coming nearer to them.

“We’re okay,” TK reassures. His eyes are a bit shiny too. He reaches out for Carlos’s hand and Carlos comes close enough to give it to him.

Neither of them offer up any hint of what their conversation was about, but Andrea stands up and gives Carlos a warm and tight hug. And even though he’s almost twice her size, he still folds easily into his mother’s arms. 

It’s not until they’re in the car, driving down the 35, the darkness of the night stretching all around them and Carlos’s hand extended over the console on TK’s thigh, does Carlos find the bravery to ask what that was about.

TK plays with Carlos’s fingers with both hands and says in a quiet voice, “She was talking to me about being a Ranger’s spouse…”

Carlos glances over at TK. It’s hard to get a read on him as they pass through swathes of light from oncoming headlights and the rare street light. 

“Oh?”

TK shakes his head, “You’ve been in law enforcement the entire time we’ve been together, baby, it’s not like her advice was anything I haven’t already worried about before.”

“What did she say?” Carlos asks, his anxiety spiking and suddenly wishing he’d saved this conversation for home so he could see TK better. 

TK’s fingers keep brushing over his knuckles. “She just wanted me to know you could be in danger sometimes, which again, isn’t really new. But she also wanted me to know if I ever need to talk to someone about what I’ll go through as your husband, I could talk to her.”

Carlos glances over again, softening a bit at his mom offering that to TK. “What do you think about that?”

“I think it’s nice.” Carlos can hear the smile in TK’s voice. “I love your mom, and I love that she would want to be there to help me support you.”

“Buuut…?”

“No but’s,” TK says, shaking his head. “She says we’re a strong couple, and sees how much we love each other. She thinks we can handle anything.”

“She’s not the only one,” Carlos smiles, squeezing TK’s thigh. 

“No,” TK smiles. “She’s not the only one. She told me the best thing I can do for you is love you, and remind you you’re never alone in life, and remind you to take care of yourself and put work away when you’re home.” 

Carlos turns his palm up and TK gives him his hand, lacing their fingers together. He takes it a step further by cradling Carlos’s arm and tilting sideways to lean against Carlos’s bicep. 

“You do a good job of making sure I’m taken care of, baby,” Carlos says softly as he takes their exit for home. 

“You’re worth it,” TK says simply, turning his face to kiss Carlos’s shoulder. 

“You know my family’s enamored with you, right?” Carlos smiles.

TK laughs and teases, “Are you jealous Tía Lucy dotes on me now more than you?”

“No,” Carlos says, his voice light. “I love seeing you with our family. It makes me happy.”

TK snuggles up against Carlos’s arm even more in the passenger seat and Carlos tells him he better not fall asleep when they’re five minutes from home. He feels TK’s smile against his arm, and fondness for his husband impossibly grows. 

TK sure does know how to steal a Reyes’s heart.

[zhng96]

𝐖/ 𝐀𝐍 𝐒/�� 𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐄 — zb1

— pairing: ot9!zb1 x gn!reader

— warnings: just tooth-rotting fluff <3

— 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐉𝐈𝐖𝐎𝐎𝐍𝐆

- SUCH a flirt

- he catches your gaze and laughs lightly and says, “you’re so adorable”

- LIKE??? HELLO?!??!

- his stomach does flips at the sight of your doe-like gaze

- like YOU were staring at HIM like that!!! how did he get so lucky!!!

- your habit of staring makes him fall in love with you even harden than he already is everytime

- he gives a cute giggle and when he’s collected himself enough he’ll walk up to you, tilt your chin up and give you smooches :)

- some other times, he’ll say “i love you” but most of the time (unable to stop himself) he goes in for the kiss

(other members under the cut!)

— 𝐙𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐀𝐎

- although he’s had his fair share of admirers, your staring never fails to make his heart flutter

- if he isn’t smiling before he catches you staring, he’ll certainly be smiling after he catches your gaze

- he gives you such a goofy and adoring smile (leave me alone i love him)

- he’ll tilt his head and then YOU SMILE AND THEN HE SMILES BRIGHTER BECAUSE YOU SMILED AND IT’S JUST SO :(((

- he asks you why you’re staring and either pinches/squishes your cheeks or grabs your hand and plays with it :(

- you tell him you just love admiring him and now it’s his turn to stare,,, sparkles of admiration shining in his eyes and now you’re the one getting shy

- no matter how much you stare at him,, a goofy grin will always make it’s way onto his face :))

— 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐁𝐈𝐍

- GETS SOSOSO SHY

- his eyes get a little wide which only causes you to soften your gaze even harder

- watching as you gaze at him with all the love in your body his mind just goes KABOOM

- has the sudden urge to kiss every inch of your face but has to fight against it

- instead he calls you over and offers his sat for you to sit on

- he then embraces you with the most delicate of touch and he gently pushes your head to rest on his shoulder

- i also feel like he’s the type to gently sway while hugging- like it’s just a habit of his

- he presses kisses on your head :)

- even though it’s a habit, he finds that he’ll never not get shy at your staring,, he does however get more confident with his affections once he catches your gaze though

— 𝐒𝐄𝐎𝐊 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐖

- he’ll be cheesin’ so hard

- he’s also so silly i love him

- he’ll move and sit right in front of you, facing you and all

- then he stares right back with a teasing smile and says, “staring contest, let’s go.”

- you laugh hard enough that your eyes close and you gently nudge him

- “i win!” he laughs before he tilts his cheek out towards you, “my prize?”

- you lean in and peck him on the cheek and he send you a thank you

- after he finds you habit of staring, he only does this a few more times before he comes up w/ another way to tease you hehe

— 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐓𝐀𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐄

- when he catches your gaze he’ll look around the room jokingly (even if it’s empty) and points an exasperated fingers towards him, as if he’s surprised by the fact you’re staring at him

- you roll your eyes light-heartedly at his action (because he does it every time T-T)

- it’s become an inside joke at this point

- sometimes he’ll even keep the joke going by waving a hand in faux shy dismissal, scoffing in delight

- all jokes aside he beckons you into a hug and tells you he loves you and that he’s so thankful for you :((

- sometimes you’ll circle the joke back to him by waving the same faux shy hand in dismissal and scoffs in delight :))

- you two are just so cuteness it makes me so sad <3

— 𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐐𝐔𝐀𝐍𝐑𝐔𝐈

- another jokester

- he’ll catch you staring and tease you by slide a hand over his slicked back hair with a jokingly arrogant gaze

- hearing you laugh and also getting the chance to be the one you’re staring at is truly something ricky will hold dear to his heart

- if you think you love him more NAH he loves you 10x harder

- literally basks in the look on your face and can’t help but tuck hair behind your ear or fix any strands that are going in directions they aren’t supposed to be

- he doesn’t want to ruin the moment by speaking so he just lets you stare while he brushes a thumb over your cheek or fixes you hair :)

- is literally so good at hiding his giddiness though, every time it happens he just has a warm smile but inside he is sweating PLSS

— 𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐆𝐘𝐔𝐕𝐈𝐍

- surprisingly gets SUPERDUPER SHY

- much like matthew he will be CHEESIN’

- he has to bring a hand up to his mouth to hide his big fat grin

- although he’s pretty forward with his affections, he still never gets used to others being forward with it as well

- the fact that you don’t back down after he asks you why you were staring makes his heart burn in adoration

- when you tell him that you just love admiring him he has to lower his head to hide his blush and smile that grew even bigger (if that was even possible)

- unable to control his fondness of you, he gently cups your cheeks and presses kisses everywhere he can on your face!!!

- he does this every time he catches you it’s almost like a routine!! he wants to make sure you know he loves you just as much as you love him <3

— 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐆𝐔𝐍𝐖𝐎𝐎𝐊

- another cheeser :))

- his smile is contagious so when he does it, you do it too and now it’s his turn to stare at your pretty smile!!

- “so pretty!!” he marvels, running towards you and pinches your cheeks

- you blush but maintain eye-contact with him, even as he pinches your cheeks

- he swears his heart swells at the sight :((

- never fails to also return you affections by complimenting you everytime he catches you staring

- he is literally perfect i love him

— 𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐘𝐔𝐉𝐈𝐍

- he’s not the most expressive person UNLESSS he gets shy

- that boy can’t hide his blush, smile and wide eyes when he catches you staring

- “what are you doing?” he asks with wide eyes,, he hopes you couldn’t hear his heartbeat T-T

- “staring”, he is caught off guard by your casual response

- “yeah, but why”

- “because i really, really like you” his mind KABOOM x2

- a big big smile makes it’s way onto his face and he can’t stop the urge to ruffle your hair and rest his head on his arms and stare at you as well

- when he rests his head in his arms you can’t help but giggle when he gives you the same adoring gaze you had just given him :)))

- eventually he’ll get used to your habit and be able to act all smug and send you confident affections,, but that might take a while hehe

navi. mlist.

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

A Twist of Fate - The End**

IT'S FINALLY DONE! I hope you guys like this final part of the A Twist of Fate series

Warnings: mentions of drug and alcohol, mental health/therapy themes, coming out as poly conversation, fingering, oral (fem receiving), unprotected sex.

WC: 25.5K

There's a playlist for this one!

When you woke up the following morning your head hurt and your body felt sore. You knew you were dancing a lot and moving in ways that your body was not accustomed to. Moreover, you were reminded of why you’d decided to stop drinking when you went out. You laid in bed in silence for several minutes, recapping all of the events from the party, and your stomach turned again as you envisioned the disillusioned look in Taylor’s eyes when she saw you coming into the bathroom.

She wasn’t mean or rude to you in any way, but a lot things flashed through your mind that made you react the way you had. The song a few months ago, the momentary lapse in your character that made you judge her when she and Harry were on vacation, and the kiss. You genuinely hadn’t felt all that bad about the kiss with Harry before, it had been a lapse in judgement, a mistake… that was until you were standing in front of her. You remembered how much you’d been fantasizing about kissing him again and apparently he felt the same way. It just felt like too many things to hold in, so they came out however they could. You were dying to apologize for ruining their evening, but you knew that speaking to either of them would cause more harm than good.

Your phone dinging with a text made you exhale. So you got a good stretch in, hearing a couple little cracks as you reached your limit and held it before relaxing and sitting up. You opened your phone and smiled when you saw Ricky’s text.

Ricky:

Hey:) Did you make it out alive? 

You had been seeing Ricky casually. It was quite an unexpected but almost obvious pairing. You’d spent a lot of time together now that you were back in the studio and you had also developed a friendship after working together for a couple years now. But after helping his sister out is when you starting hanging out more. One night when he was dropping you off after you guys had seen Provoker you just had this tense moment and he kissed you and you kissed back and well, now you’d been hooking up for a little over a month. 

Y/N: 

I did! Barely, but still haha

Ricky: 

But still:) When are you back?

Y/N:

Tuesday morning. Why…?

Ricky:

We should do something.

Y/N:

Yeah, that sounds nice. Maybe we can go to Venice? Grab some brunch and get high on the beach.

Ricky:

I think I might have to break our no romantic feelings rule over that.

You giggled as you read his reply and before you could respond a few knocks on the door startled you.

“Come in!” You called out.

“You’re up already?” Caitlyn asked with a smile and you nodded as she came over and climbed into the empty side of the bed. “How’d you sleep?”

“I should be asking you. The couch wasn’t too bad?” 

“It was alright. Better than being the audience to your tears all night.” She teased and you chuckled.

“Well, I didn’t really cry last night any more. I think it was just all really overwhelming in the moment.” You said and she nodded.

“Good. So you’re feeling OK? No bad crash?” She asked and you shook your head.

“I mean, I do feel a little down, but I don’t think it has anything to do with the molly…” you said and she hummed. “I’m just not happy with-” you paused and turned your attention back to you phone when it dinged in your hands and saw Ricky’s message.

Ricky:

I’m sorry. Did I make it weird?

Y/N:

No, not at all! Sorry, Cait just came in to check on me:)

Ricky:

Okay, thank fuck haha

Ricky:

Well I’ll let you go, I actually have to work out now so…

Y/N:

Stoooop, you do not lol It’s the worst, so I wouldn’t hold it against you if you didn’t.

Ricky:

Okay. I’ll just pretend not to know anything about your track history lol

Y/N:

Yeah, do that. I’ll text you later:)

Ricky:

Sounds good! 

“Look at you, all smiley after you said you’re a little down…” Caitlyn pointed out and you chuckled.

“It’s just Ricky.” You explained.

“Ah, still riding that…hmmm.” she hummed and you chuckled.

“God, so crass…” 

“I know.” She grinned and then your smile dropped as you recalled the previous topic at hand.

“I just feel really bad for yesterday. I hope I didn’t cause too big of a fuss with Harry and Taylor. I’m sure my reaction made me seem guilty of what she assumed.” You sighed, already overthinking it all over again. You’d replayed the scenario over and over at least a solid thousand times in the shower last night.

“Oh, they’ll be fine.” Caitlyn scoffed through a laugh, “You did the right thing in trying to avoid him. Who cares what she took the whole puking thing as. Hopefully she is able to believe Harry that you weren’t together and if she doesn’t well, that’s her issue, not yours.” She advised and you nodded.

“Right.” You smiled a bit.

“Well, what should we do today? Have breakfast and go for a little walk? Help wear off any hangover symptoms?”

“Yeah, that actually sounds good.”

“OK.” She smiled and got out of the bed, “I should shower first. S’gonna be a long one after the night we had.” She mumbled and you nodded.

“Oh yeah, please. Take your time.” You insisted.

**************

HARRY’S POV:

Harry hardly slept a wink. He hadn’t been able to reach anyone to stay with at the last minute and all the hotels he knew he could safely stay at were booked out, so he stayed on the couch in the suite. The couch was far too firm for his liking, but he still laid down there and just thought. He thought and thought for hours and hours if all of this had been worth it. He didn’t have Taylor and he didn’t have you. He felt heartbroken but he knew that this was the best outcome. He clearly couldn’t make up for the past, at least not in Taylor’s eyes. And it was better that they end things than for him to keep trying to meet an impossible expectation. Taylor wanted him to stop loving you, it was genuinely an impossible request. And settling deep in some crevice somewhere beneath all the hurt he recognized the feeling of relief. 

He tried his best to figure out what the relief was about, but he kept coming back to the same thing, he was relieved that the relationship was over. He felt wrong for having that thought. It was uncomfortable to have that knowledge and to just sit with it. But he processed through the discomfort and soon concluded that just how Taylor said she didn’t like herself anymore, neither did he. He was afraid to say or do the wrong thing and then be back in a weird limbo thing where she’d leave his place for a few days to clear her head and then come back a few days later with another condition he needed to meet to make things “work”. She was never unreasonable, but he was tired. He felt like he was fighting against who he was and he hated it. His mum always told him that he should be with someone who loves and accepts who he is and that he shouldn’t have to change fundamental parts of himself for the sake of making someone else happy.

He checked the time, it was only 7am and he dreaded being an early riser right now when he needed the rest. He just lay there quietly for a while, he could hear her moving around in the bedroom, she was probably packing up, their flight left that night. He had no idea what her plans were. Eventually, he really needed to use the bathroom and wanted a shower so he sat up and stretched his arms back behind his head and arched his back up, the low crack of his back releasing its tension made him hum before he stood. He knocked at the door gently with his index finger.

“Yeah?”

“I need a wee. And a shower.” He said. Moments later the lock clicked and she opened the door.

“Morning.”

“Good morning.” He murmured.

“You alright?” She asked.

“Yeah, I think so.” He said, “And you?”

“Good too. I don’t…regret it. Or take it back if that’s what you’re asking.” She said and he nodded, “Ummm, well go ahead and get in there.” She said.

“Tay?”

“Yeah?” She asked, eyes meeting his.

“We should talk logistics after. Don’t scamper off, alright?” He asked and she nodded.

“Yeah, ummm, should I order up?”

“Yeah, I’ll have whatever you have.”

“Kay.” She hummed.

When Harry got out their breakfast was being delivered. So he got dressed quickly and then headed out to the little table out in the lounging area of their suite. The spread looked good and he soon sat down and started eating. It was tense and quiet for a bit before he spoke up.

“So ummm…are you going to come back to London with me or take some time away?” He asked.

“Ummm, I think I’m gonna stay here. Just ummm…get a bit of space.”

“Yeah, that’s alright. Ummm, obviously, I can take care of this for you-”

“No, it’s alright. I mean…I broke up with you, if anything I should pay for you and…soothe your broken heart.” She said with a small smile and he chuckled.

“I might not seem like it but I am upset. It just doesn’t feel real yet.” He explained and she offered a tight-lipped smiled.

“It’s alright, I know what you mean.” She mumbled before they ate a bit more. “So ummm, are you gonna go after her? Y/N?”

“Ummm, we had this deal where we’d see where fate led us, so no.” he said and she sighed.

“All that for you not to go after what you really want?”

“It’s not like that. I really wanted things to work with you too, like I love you and I care about you-”

“Sure, but the whole time you’ve loved her. So you should go be with her.” She said, as if it were the obvious next move. He still didn’t think that she was fully understanding what was really going on inside of him.

“I mean, it’s not that simple…” 

“Sure it is, Harry.” She sighed, “You’ve been pining after her all these years. I mean, I know that things didn’t work out how you wanted the first time and that letting go really hurt you. But I think you’ve been running from what you really want for long enough, H. I know you’re scared that you’ll put yourself out there and it won’t work again, but you have to take the risk.”

“I will, just…when the time is right.” He said and she nodded.

After she packed the last of her things she headed off to somewhere he didn’t know and that was that.

****************

You had just finished breakfast and Caitlyn had just hopped in the shower and you were trying to figure out what to wear out. You had two options laid out on the bed when Caitlyn’s phone started ringing from the bedside table and you hurried over and froze as you saw “Harry Styles, mobile” displayed on the glass screen. There was a wacky picture of him making a funny, irritated face in the background. It made you smile for a moment before you wondered why he’d be calling. Maybe something was wrong? You decided to deal with the consequences later and just answer it. 

“Hello?” You greeted tentatively. Your voice faded into a breathless whisper by the second syllable of the word as the uncertainty of your decision grew.

“Y/N?” He asked, almost in disbelief and you nodded and then remembered you weren’t in front of him and inhaled sharply.

“Yeah, it’s me.” You responded and smiled when you heard him sigh in relief and then chuckle.

“Hi!” He greeted cheerfully.

“Hi.” You laughed breathily and then waited for his response.

“Ummm, I was only calling to check on you actually.” He said.

“Oh, that’s sweet of you.”

“Well, I heard through the grapevine that you got a little sick.” He chuckled and you giggled.

“Yeah, that happened…” you said and he hummed, “I’m alright, I just got overwhelmed because I was drinking and also I…did drugs. I don’t think I would’ve had such a theatrical reaction otherwise.” You explained.

“Well either way, I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

“Thank you. And how are you? I was worried that I maybe… caused some…tension between you and Taylor last night.” You said carefully.

“Yeah, I’m…alright.” He said, face twisted up a bit awkwardly.

“Why did you say it weird?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Did I?”

“I know you…” you said knowingly and he smiled to himself.

“I’m just so happy to hear your voice again. I missed the sound.” He expressed and you felt your cheeks getting all warm as you blushed.

“I’ve missed you too. A lot.” You responded. “So, how are you? Really.” You asked again. Harry was great at deflecting. But if something was wrong with them and you had unintentionally caused it, then the least you could do was talk it out with him.

“I swear, I am fine, but ummm…Taylor actually…broke up with me.” He said and you gasped audibly.

“Oh my god…” you sighed regretfully, already feeling awful and guilty for their demise, “I’m so sorry, H. So truly sorry. Are you sure you’re alright?” You asked and he sighed, “Was it because of me?” You asked next, your voice was small and quiet.

“Oh no, get that out of your head. Not at all.” He responded immediately, “It wasn’t you. This was all me…” he said and you sighed, “But I promise I’m good. Well at least right now I am…” he said.

“Well, when you don’t feel good you can call me, you know?” You said and he chuckled.

“Actually I can’t…I haven’t got your number any more.” He confessed and you scoffed.

“Oh…Okay…” you hummed in playful offense.

“I assure you it wasn’t my idea.” He added with a chuckle, “But I mean, deleting it didn’t really do what it was intended to, which was get me to forget about you, so…” He chuckled.

“I mean…” you hummed and giggled.

“Well ummm…I’m glad you’re alright.”

“Thanks. When are you heading home?”

“Tonight. I leave at 10.”

“Oh ummm…if you wanted some company we’re gonna go for a walk in the park?” You offered.

“Really?”

“Yeah, H.”

“Yeah, I’d love to come. Ummm, I’m staying at The Mark, so right near the park.”

“Oh, we’re at the Carlyle! Just down the street from you. We can walk over and meet you in the lobby?”

“Yeah, that’s perfect. Text me when you guys are walking over.”

“Will do.” You smiled.

“Alright, see you later. Bye.”

“Bye.”

When Caitlyn came out of the shower you immediately told her what you’d done and that Harry and Taylor had broken up. She was completely shocked that something as seemingly insignificant as running into you in the bathroom had been the thing that pushed Taylor over the edge.

“Wow…”

“I know. He said it wasn’t my fault but…I mean it all goes to shit after I had a wee run in with Taylor in the bathroom?”

“Yeah…I just can’t believe that is what broke the camel’s back. Like, it must’ve been quite bad between them if that’s all it took, you know?”

“Yeah…like I feel like it’s kind of my fault, but I also know I didn’t do anything, you know? But God, just seeing the joy drain from her face when she realized it was me…that sucked.”

“I can imagine. But hey, now you’re both single, maybe you guys can try again now.”

“Maybe…but he really loved her so I think he will need some time to get past this.”

“Just don’t wait too long. With both of you griping at me I don’t know what to do anymore.” She chuckled and you smiled.

“Yeah…”

***************

You and Caitlyn were waiting in the lobby at The Mark and after a few minutes Harry was wandering down looking cozy in a hoodie and some workout shorts. He smiled and waved when he saw you guys. You and Caitlyn waved back as he came closer.

“Hiya.” He said lowly as he hugged Caitlyn.

“Hey.” She hummed and then they pulled back.

“Hi.” He said more timidly as he stepped over to you and hugged you into his body. You relaxed in his hold and sighed in relief.

“Hi. It’s so good to see you.” You smiled as you pulled back.

“You too.” He grinned, “Umm, shall we?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” Caitlyn agreed.

You were all chatting, recounting your adventures from the MET as you made your walk through the park. Then, Caitlyn would take you guys to a coffee shop she really liked. It was relaxed, though as you got deeper through the park a couple of people did notice you guys and two girls started following you guys for a bit until you were veering too far from their path. You were all linked arms and skipping as you playfully sung the “We’re Off to See the Wizard” song from “The Wizard of Oz” through your laughter.

“Okay friends, ready for a little caffeine boost?” Caitlyn asked.

“Definitely.” Harry chuckled and then you guys started heading back. 

While waiting in line at the coffee shop and chatting with Caitlyn about what you guys should try, you and Harry had to respectfully decline getting pictures and videos with fans to avoid making a huge fuss. But nevertheless, it was obvious that people were recording from afar or taking pictures without your consent. He didn’t seem as nervous or fearful about it as he did when you two dated, so at least there was that. He felt far more confident and comfortable declining these requests now. Before he felt a little bit obligated, as did you, because if it weren’t for these people’s support you wouldn’t be where you were. 

You did a lot of work on boundaries in therapy and now you thought of it as being on and off the clock. If you were at an event or on a stage or out in public repping a certain brand or product even if you were with friends then you were “on the clock”. But if you were just hanging out with your friends, running errands, going about your day…then you considered yourself to be “off the clock” and during these moments, depending on where you were or who you were with, you might accept or decline the requests fans made of you. Now, after what Harry had been dealing with since the night (or early morning technically) you didn’t really want anyone getting too close and you could see the gratitude in his eyes when you turned away yet another fan who was gazing between the two of you and deciding that you might be the easiest target. 

“You’ve gotten really good at this.” Harry hummed lowly as he leaned closer to you and you giggled as his lips slightly tickled your ear.

“Thanks. Therapy.” You said as you glanced up at him and he hummed.

“Not cause of me, right?” He asked quietly.

“Not primarily, but you came up.” You confirmed and he smiled.

“I talked about you too. A lot.” He chuckled and you smiled.

“All good things I hope…”

“Oh yeah…definitely.” He said sarcastically and you laughed and you moved to elbow him playfully but he caught your arm first and just pulled your body in front of his. “Had to overpower you to prevent any violence.” He said quietly and you laughed and tossed your head back to rest on his shoulder and he glanced down at you.

“You have boogies.” You grinned as you informed him quietly and he furrowed his eyebrows and scoffed.

“No I don’t.” He sniffled and ran his finger under his nose just in case and you laughed and turned around to face him again now that his dominant hand was occupied. “Do I really?” He asked you quietly and you sniggered and shook your head.

“No, just messing with you.” You assured him as you laughed and he rolled his eyes before suddenly grabbing your arms and pulling you in and then pulling your arms around his torso.

“Hug me.” He requested softly and you swore the entire world stopped just then and you smiled as you leaned into him and hugged him tight before he squeezed around your waist and exhaled. You gently scratched over the expanse of his back for a few moments, “Now when I google us this’ll come up.” He said softly.

“Hmmm, very clever.” You smiled, “Love it.” You decided and he chuckled.

“Okay, stop flirting and decide on your drinks, we’re next in line.” Caitlyn said.

“Ready?” You asked softly.

“No.” Harry mumbled, “But do it. Just do it.” You sighed and let go of him and you looked up at him with a gentle smile as you rubbed over his shoulder.

“Oh, I missed you.” You said and he grinned and you turned around as you heard Caitlyn start ordering her drink.

“Please don’t check ‘em out, I’ve got them covered.” Harry called to the cashier who nodded and smiled at him. Soon after you were all corned up near the pick up counter chatting, including Caitlyn in it a lot more now that you and Harry had been able to just relish in each other’s company for a little bit.

“Order for Harry!” The barista called and Harry walked up and grabbed the drinks, smiling at the barista and mumbling a thanks before going the few steps over to you guys and handing over your drinks. 

Caitlyn had gotten a matcha latte while you and Harry opted for plain cold brews. Once again, you guys took off but this time back to your hotels with your drinks in hand to beat the warmth of the day. You guys were talking about your favorite looks of the night as you made the walk back and when you were down the street he turned to you guys.

“Ummm, would you guys want to come up for a bit? I don’t have to leave until 8 from here?” He asked, “We could have dinner?” He asked you two and Caitlyn shrugged.

“Yeah, I’m down.” She smiled and you turned to Harry and nodded in agreement. 

After being seen leaving earlier, there were people waiting around for him outside the hotel but you guys rushed in quickly and then headed up to his suite. You headed off to the bathroom while Caitlyn and Harry picked something to watch. You looked yourself over in the mirror and you were glad that you looked alright, you felt a little weird from your slight hangover still, bit you were glad you didn’t look dead. When you opened up the door Caitlyn was sitting on the bed waiting for you to get out so she could go in.

“S’all yours.” You smiled as you stepped out.

“Behave.” She admonished and you giggled and headed back out to the little “living room” area to see Harry still scrolling through the channels on the TV with a little furrow in his brow and a slight squint to his eyes and you smiled.

“Where are you glasses?”

“I lost ‘em a bit ago.” He said glancing over to you before you plopped down beside him.

“Oh H…”

“I know. Haven’t been able to secure an appointment.” He said and you hummed. 

“You feeling OK though?” You asked more seriously and he nodded.

“Yeah…like it sucks, but you guys are good company. I’m sure I’ll feel it when I’m on my own though.”

“Well I think that’s great, H.” You said and he looked at you a bit perplexed, “I mean that you have to feel this out. I know that you really love her and that this can’t be easy for you, so you have to sit with it a bit and just go through the motions of it all.” You explained.

“And what about us? Didn’t we agree that-”

“Technically you said a few years from now…” you said with a soft smile.

“Well I’ll be 30-something by then…”

“So will I…” you shrugged and he smiled a bit sadly.

“Have you…changed your mind?” He asked you cautiously. He was trying not to look broken up about it, but you knew him well and you could see the fear and concern in his eyes.

“I’m not saying that. I’m saying you need to be single for a little bit. More than two months.” You said and he chuckled, “Seriously Harry, when we ended you had a new girlfriend a few months later. And then when that ended you were suddenly with Taylor, no?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Yeah, I did kinda rush into this last few more than usual…it just felt really right at the time and we vibed well. I knew I’d be off for a bit so it felt like good time to try.” He explained with a shrug. “Taylor actually started talking to me before I was single, so we were friends for a bit so it’s not like I just dated someone I hardly knew.” He defended and you giggled along with him.

“Yeah, I joke a bit. But I mean, as long as you don’t regret the time you’ve spent and as long as you’ve learned and grown from these people and your relationships with them I think that’s great. But I think we both know that filling the void is simply a bandaid.” You explained.

“I know…” he sighed, “I really am just so scared of being alone.”

“Well H, you’re never going to be alone. I’m here whenever you need anything.” You assured and he glanced to you with a smile, “I know that maybe it was just…scary to talk and be around each other before, but I mean once we did see each other it didn’t…hurt. Not at all. It actually brought me…relief that…nothing had really changed between us.” You said to him and he hummed and nodded.

“Yeah.” He smiled, “You know I was genuinely dreading the day I’d run into you. I think I also thought it would be painful or feel like defeat or failure… it did fuck me up a bit but in a good way.” He assured and you chuckled.

“Yeah, same…” you smiled, “Well, all that to say that I love you, a lot! And I’ll always be here for you no matter what happens with us. I don’t want us to be estranged ever again. Got it?”

“Yeah.” He nodded with a relieved smile, “You know, I think you’re right though…”

“Of course I am.” You said, “About what?” He chuckled.

“That I need to just take a little bit of time to really just get through this and then we can think of everything else.”

“Right.” You smiled. 

You guys fell silent for a bit and then you heard that Caitlyn was actually on the phone in the bedroom. When you glanced back there the door was nearly closed all the way and you sighed as you glanced down at your hands.

“How about you? How’ve you been?” He asked.

“Good.” You nodded, “I mean, Seb was relentless for a bit, but a few weeks ago he just stopped trying to win me back. I mean, I don’t think what he wants is awful, but I don’t see myself changing that much of myself just to fit the kind of person he wants.”

“Yeah.” Harry nodded in understanding. “Like I don’t think that’s a bad thing either, but it’s just the way he expects it to rest on you that’s a little…antiquated.” He chuckled and you nodded.

“Right, like don’t tell it to me like it’s my job because I’m a female. That’s where it really upset me. Like if you have a life together and you share a home and have a family it’s both of yours to look after!”

“I agree.” He chuckled, “You know, I still don’t know how to change a tire.” He chuckled and you smiled.

“I don’t think you’ll ever need to know anyway.” You teased and he sniggered. He repositioned himself so that he was facing you now and you glanced over at him. “What?” You questioned and he smiled.

“I’m really happy that you’re here.” He said softly.

“Me too.” You assured and then he pulled you into his arms and hugged you tight. He sighed in relief as he rested his cheek over the top of your head. As you exhaled your body melted into his even more until he just left himself fall back against the arm of the couch.

“You know, when we were together, I genuinely thought you were the best person I’d ever met. And like even now, it’s like you’re still the same person but just elevated, if that makes sense?” He asked and you hummed, “I want to experience you as you are now. I really love what I’ve seen. Your self control, your patience, and your self awareness, I really enjoy seeing you this way. I think when we were younger you kind of…looked to me a lot to gauge how you should feel about things…like not that you were just agreeing with me, but that my views and perception of things mattered a lot and influenced yours a lot.” He explained and you hummed.

“Yeah, that’s very true. I think you just had so much more experience in the world and I agreed with mostly everything you cared about and so I definitely tried to learn things from you and let those things influence me a lot.” 

“Well not anymore…” he smiled, “I mean, I think values-wise we’ll always be on the same page, but now you’ve grown into it on your own. Like, you took all this time to just look after yourself and understand yourself and I’m just so proud of who you’ve become. And I want to…get to that point. I want to get to a point where you are proud of me.” He said.

“Oh, I am!” You said as you set up and turned to face him again, “I think you’ve come such a long way, H. And I think you know who you are now and it’s so refreshing to see it. I think you’ve overcome your need to people please and also your fear of what people think of you and what you do. Before, the way you were perceived was almost the most important thing to you.”

“Yeah.” He agreed.

“Like over the last couple years, seeing you out and about with your friends, your partners, or whatever it be, I mean, I love it! You’ve started choosing the things and people that make you happy regardless of what other people think and I love that for you so, so much. I’ve just always wanted for you to feel happy with yourself.” You said as you reached for and then squeezed his hand in yours. He glanced down at it and smiled.

“I do, I really do.” He assured you. “You know, I just can’t help but get excited when I think about how things will be with us when we try again. It’s going to be so good…we’ve both grown up so much and really taken care of ourselves. I think I might have a bit of catching up to do with you…” he chuckled, “But I’m going to work hard at it for myself and for us too.” He said and you smiled.

“Well just know that I’ve loved every version of you so far because you’ve always been good to me. But it’s really important to me that you feel happy with yourself and clearly that’s something you’re getting more and more in tune with and it’s very beautiful to witness.” You said.

“Ummm, thank you.” He said with a timid smile as you ran your thumb over his knuckles.

“Yeah, of course.” You replied. And before anything more could happen Caitlyn came out of the bedroom and let out an exasperated sigh. “Is everything alright?” You asked her as you both watched her come around.

“A writing session got moved up for a show I’m working on and I’ll need to be back in LA tomorrow afternoon.” She groaned as she plopped down on the couch. “I found a flight, a red eye though.” She said and you hummed.

“Well I’ll go back too, don’t want to be here by myself.” You said and she nodded.

“OK, let me get them then.”

“OK, I’ll Zelle you right now, just let me know how much they are.” You said and she nodded.

“We need to pack.”

“Yeah…” you sighed.

“You guys can go if you want. Please don’t feel obligated to hang around here.” Harry said.

“What if we help you finish your packing and then you can come with us and we can pack while we have dinner and then you go from there?” Caitlyn suggested.

“Ummm yeah, I’d love that actually.” He said.

“Settled then.” You smiled at him and he returned a brighter smile, “Let’s do it!” You said and he guided you guys to the bedroom and got his things together. 

He only had a carry on as he was only there for a few days so this didn’t take too long. You guys ordered an Uber while Harry checked out and then you all headed back to your hotel. Caitlyn did her own packing as she didn’t want Harry seeing her intimates and such, so he stuck to helping you. Not that he had seen any of your new stuff, but at least he’d been in that position before. Since you guys were going to be there for a week total you guys unpacked your things into the dressers and closet, so currently all your things were laid out on the floor while Caitlyn’s were on the large bed you had shared over the last several days.

“So you guys shared?” Harry asked as he folded up some of your jeans.

“Yep. Though I don’t think we will ever again-”

“Oh my god…I shoved you one night.” Caitlyn said as you started to laugh and Harry did too.

“One night’s enough trauma.” You said and she scoffed.

“Do you kick?” Harry asked.

“No, I think I maybe had a very vivid dream because I’m usually a very still.” She explained, “Though you are a cuddler. Maybe I was trying to get away from you.” She said to you and you giggled.

“Maybe…it’s just when I sleep in unfamiliar spaces.” You explained and Harry smiled at you.

“Still? With how much you’re on the road for tours and shit?” He asked and you shrugged, “S’cute.” He assured you softly as he continued folding one of your tops.

“It’s not.” Caitlyn said to you with a grin and you just stuck your tongue out at her and she chuckled.

After a bit you guys ordered in some grilled cheese sandwiches because it’s just a lovely comfort food. With Harry there and some stimulating conversation you guys finished packing quite fast, but now you had to go down to reception and sort out the early check out. Harry offered to go with you but you assured him it was fine, you didn’t want him to get flocked in the lobby and then you hurried out promising to be back soon.

“So…what’s up with you two?” Caitlyn asked Harry when you left.

“She wants me to stay single for a while and properly move past this. I mean, she’s right of course, but it’s just something I struggle with.” He admitted, “But she said I can count on her if I need anything.” He said of you.

“Yeah, of course. And me too! You have so many friends out in LA who would more than gladly lend an ear since we don’t see you as much anymore.” She explained and he smiled.

“Well thank you. I will definitely take advantage of that. And like…I do want to work on myself a bit more…maybe I can head out there for a bit and get some face time with my therapist. We talk on the phone or do virtual stuff sometimes, but I think I could use some in person intensive work. We haven’t spoken in maybe…close to a year.” He explained with a chuckle.

“Well yeah, if it’ll be beneficial to you, do it.” She encouraged him.

“Ummm, I hate to do this to you but ummm…I saw Y/N texting someone quite a bit while we were down here…is she seeing someone?” He asked, “Or maybe I should just ask her…yeah, I’ll just ask her.” He said instead and Caitlyn chuckled.

“Alright.” She smiled. Shortly after you came back into the room and told Caitlyn everything was good to go for your earlier departure. “Excellent.” She said to you, “Well, now that we’re all packed I’m going to smoke my joint on the balcony, I want this to be the greatest grilled cheese I’ve eaten in a long time.” She said as she stood from the bed and stretched. “Do you guys want some?” She asked glancing to them and then giving Harry a knowing glance.

“No, I’m alright.” Harry said.

“Same.” You assured her and she smiled and then made her way out of the bedroom and into the common area of your shared suite and after a few moments you guys heard the door shut behind her. 

“You still don’t smoke?”

“I’ve tried, I just can’t. It burns so bad.” You grimaced and he chuckled.

“S’not good for us anyway…” he said and you nodded, “Ummm…can I ask you something?” 

“Yeah, of course.” You nodded and waited for him to speak up expectantly.

“That umm…the guy you keep texting? Are you- is he-”

“Oh no. No, no, no.” you said to him right away, “Well…we are…ummm, hooking up, but he’s just a friend.” You explained and he nodded.

“Oh okay. I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t like…coming on so strong just for you to be…taken again.”

“I’m not the one who moves lightening fast here…” you teased and he chuckled and bit down on his lip to suppress the laughter he wanted to let out, “Come on…you know it was funny.” You pressed as you giggled.

“Yeah, real fucking funny.” He grinned and you chuckled as you stood up from the floor, “Where are you going?”

“Nowhere, just up here. I wanna pick a really funny movie because I really like it when she gets all giggly.” You explained to Harry and he laughed as he also pushed himself up off the ground and joined you on the large king bed. You glanced down at the remote with about a bajillion buttons and scoffed as you tried to find the one that would bring up the list of the scheduled programming.

“Need some help?”

“I can do it.” You assured as you pressed yet another wrong button, “Doesn’t it usually say guide?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Yeah? Does it not?”

“No…” you hummed, “Here.” You said handing it over and he scanned over his options before just trying “menu” and hoping that would take him somewhere useful but nothing happened, “I think we’re on the menu page.” You said to him and he furrowed his eyebrows.

“Should we call the front desk?”

“Oh no, that’s humiliating. I think we can just press every button until we find it.” You sniggered and he handed it back over.

“You do it then.” 

“Gladly.” You hummed and started going button by button, after a few tries you gasped and you got it. “Oh! Hooray!” You exclaimed and he just watched you light up at such a tiny thing and it made his heart flutter at just how cute you were. That’s one thing he missed so much about you. You made such a big fuss over things, truly anything was an excuse to celebrate and be joyful. He missed being around that, there truly wasn’t a victory too small for you. Harry studied your face as you looked through the channels listed on the screen. “You’re staring.” You smiled without peeling your eyes from the screen.

“I know.” He responded and you glanced over to him to find him just admiring you. “You’re just so breathtaking.” he said softly. It made your heart flutter and for your tummy to feel all tingly as his gaze raked down your face and then landed on your lips. You had to look away because you swore your throat was closing up from how nervous you were. But when his hand landed under your jaw and angled you back up to look into his eyes you swallowed thickly.

“Har…” you whispered and squeezed your eyes shut.

“No, baby. Look at me. Please.” He insisted and you blinked your eyes open to look at him again with a racing pulse as he inched closer to you. Your noses touched and you lingered near each other nervously, eyes flickering between each others as your lips skimmed together as your breaths started getting heavier. Both of you were hoping one of you would be brave enough to bite the bullet or to just break it off. But preferably to follow through with the kiss.

“Fuck it.” You whispered before surging up to properly connect your lips. The first kiss was just a quick one, a tester almost since you both just looked at each other for a moment.

“One more.” He mumbled and you nodded before he leaned back in and held your neck gently as he kissed you deeper this time. But that kiss inevitably became a string of smiley pecks as you two tried to pull away. “Just one more then.” He smiled and you laughed a bit as he kissed over your top lip and then your bottom lip before he pulled back and your eyes met again. They were both sparkling with need and before you knew it your arms were around his neck and he was settling himself over you as your head sank into the fluffy pillow beneath you . Harry’s warm smooth lips moved in a perfectly synchronized and familiar dance with your own as you kissed ardently.

You moaned as he rolled you onto your sides and his arm draped over your hip and then slid under your shirt. His fingers tickled up your bare back before his hand flattened right beneath the band of your bra and pushed you closer to him. His thigh was trapped between your legs, allowing just a bit of friction for you. Your tongues slid together before he sucked on your bottom lip and then went back in to kiss you properly. Just as things were about to get a bit more heated you heard some heavy knocks on the door along with the room service call. 

“Mmm…need to get the food.” You mumbled against his mouth.

“In a second.” He hummed before licking into you again and you shuddered and moaned into his mouth at his intensity and fell back into the languid kiss. You were buzzing with excitement as he started to peck your lips a few times before slowly retreating until finally, you were both just panting heavily as you regained your breaths. “Okay, go.” He hummed softly with a smile.

“One more.” You whispered to him and he grinned and grabbed your face before pecking over your lips several times until you were both giggling through it, no amount of kisses were enough for either of you.

“Just leave or I won’t be able to stop.” He mumbled and you laughed, tossing your head back which caused him to kiss your chin. When you straightened up again he ran his thumb down your smile line, “Mmmm, I’ve missed your laugh. And your lips, and how you taste, and how you kiss me…” he muttered between gentle smooches. “It’s just not like this with anyone else.” He mumbled and you pressed your forehead against his.

“It’s really not.” You agreed, “Okay, let me get the food. And Caitlyn.” You said and he nodded before kissing the tip of your nose and letting you go. You rolled out of the bed and then hurried to get the door to wheel in your tray of food and then you went to grab Caitlyn who was already quite stoned. “Come to bed, we’re gonna watch a movie or something.”

“Kay.” She mumbled and followed you into the bedroom as you pushed the little cart in.

Harry rolled out of the bed and grabbed his sandwich before hopping back on and then you grabbed yours and got on the bed next. Caitlyn stayed standing as she picked at the fries on her plate.

“Get on.” You giggled and she sniggered.

“Oh right, right…” she hummed and got in behind you. “What’re we watching?” She asked as she leaned against the headboard.

“Oh, we’re watching Derry Girls. This thing has Netflix.” Harry said as he searched it up.

“How convenient that you know how it works now.” You said to him as he pointed the remote at the TV.

“Oh no, I just pressed something by mistake as I adjusted myself a bit.” He chuckled, “Well m-my position! I adjusted my position.” He clarified quickly for Caitlyn’s sake.

“Oh please, I only left to give you guys a moment. The sexual tension is suffocating.” Caitlyn said before biting into her sandwich and then moaning in delight at the perfectly crisp bread and then the gooey, warm cheese. “What you two have is what I have with this sandwich right now…fuck, that’s perfect…” she sighed happily. And you just giggled as you glanced to Harry and shrugged and he smiled and then you all started eating as the show started up.

The time for Harry to go came very swiftly and before you knew it, you and Caitlyn were getting in the elevator to walk him out to meet his driver. You all chatted a bit during the ride down and finally you were heading out to the lobby.

“Ummm Cait can you be a look out for a minute?” Harry asked her and she smiled and nodded as she reached for his suitcase and Harry grabbed your hand and pulled you into the stairwell. “I just wanted to hold you for a little bit.” He said and you smiled and hugged him tight and he sighed and squeezed you.

“You’re gonna be a alright, H.” You assured him, “And if at any point you’re not, I’m here for you. Always.” You assured him and you felt him nod in understanding. “I love you. So, so much.” You reminded him.

“I love you too.” He whispered back. After a few more moments you pulled back and tiptoed before you grabbed his face gently in your hands and smiled as you pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

“One for the road.” You hummed and he smiled.

“Thank you.”

“Of course.” You assured him and then you grabbed his hand and led him back out by the elevators.

“That was quick.” Caitlyn smirked and you both rolled your eyes at her as she giggled.

“You’re a menace.” Harry said as he grabbed his bag from her hands.

“I know.” She giggled.

“Come on. Can’t keep the driver waiting.” You said and then you guys headed out. 

The night was still warm and Harry greeted his driver before getting his bag in the car. There were a few people lingering outside who were now watching the three of you considering Harry was a hard person to miss, his energy alone commanded people’s attention. 

“Well thank you both for including me today. I had a lot of fun and I missed being with you guys.” He smiled.

“I’m glad you had a good time.”, “Of course, H.” You and Caitlyn ensured.

“A group hug is in order, I think.” He said and you both smiled and huddled around him.

“Don’t be a stranger.” Caitlyn hummed as you guys pulled apart.

“I won’t.” He assured with a smile before hugging her and then he hugged you. He held you a bit longer than Caitlyn before he released you.

“Let me know when you land and make it home safe. Okay?” You smiled up at him as you rubbed his arm sweetly and he nodded before hopping in the car. You guys waved him off and then headed back up to your suite.

“You know you’re gonna go way more viral now…” Caitlyn said and you sighed.

“No, I think people will say he cheated on Taylor with me and wreak havoc on me.” You said, realistically. 

“Well, he kinda did…” Caitlyn said through a chuckle.

“Oh, shut it.” You quipped and she laughed. “Fuck…he did though.”

“It was a kiss.” 

“A kiss she doesn’t know about.” Caitlyn reminded and you nibbled on your bottom lip as you rode back up to your floor.

“Maybe asking him to join us was a mistake? I mean…he looked far too happy for just being broken up with.”

“Friend, he hadn’t been happyfor a while now and it was all to do with the path his relationship was going down. Not you.” She said emphatically, “You both kept your end of the bargain by keeping your distance and seeing what would happen in the future. It was just hard for Taylor to live with the information that he still loves you. Do you think he’s polyamorous?” She asked you.

“I don’t know…maybe?” You shrugged.

“I mean, at least when we spoke about his predicament that’s what it sounded like to me. That he loved you but that he also loved Taylor and he wanted to try and keep his feelings for you “on pause” somehow to work on his relationship with her.” She explained and you hummed. “But I think to her it was hard to come to terms that he was in love with you while simultaneously being in love with her. And I told him that it just doesn’t work for some people, they don’t see how love can be expansive like that in a committed relationship. My first ever girlfriend in college, Jen, was poly. And I thought I was okay with it, she said she could be monogamous, just her feelings continued to exist for others. She had this friend though that she loved too, it was just so obvious how they felt for each other and it sucked. It started to affect how I felt in that relationship. She never crossed a line and neither did he, but I just felt really insecure in it. I understand it so much better now, I mean I was only 19 when I dated her. But I fully understand why for Taylor it was just not possible to move forward with Harry if this is her first time in a situation like this.” She explained and you nodded. “And I mean, I think that you also need to figure out if that’s something you can live with if he is.” She said.

“Right…”

“Like I get that you guys are like each other’s person, but that doesn’t mean he can’t meet and love someone else along the way, you know?”

“Yeah, that’s true…I mean, just seeing how he was trying to accommodate things to support Taylor’s needs gives me a sense of peace. But I mean, we should definitely have a conversation about what this might look like for him in the future whenever we get back to a stage where we’ll have a relationship.”

“I agree.” Caitlyn said.

Overall, you felt good about where you were now to be back in touch with Harry if he needed you at any point. You were also extremely proud of yourself for the way you handled the situation about your future together. Of course, you would run into his arms at a moment’s notice, but he was sad and he needed to grieve the wonderful person he had lost. He did love Taylor, at least enough to put all of his effort into making up for breaking her trust. It had just happened and you really wanted to give him time to sit with the situation and work through the hard feelings you knew would come soon.

As soon as you guys landed early the next morning you, Harry, and Caitlyn were plastered all over social media per a call from your manager. She sent you a link and you looked and sure enough there were photos and videos of you three talking and skipping through central park, looking like you were having the best day of your lives. You showed Caitlyn who just mumbled a low “it is what it is” and you bit your lip.

JENNY L:

And there’s also this one…

You saw her next text and then clicked on the linked article and when it loaded you couldn’t help but snort out a laugh as you read the obscenely cheesy title of the gossip article: “STYLES CHOOSES TO SKIP OUT ON TAYLOR!” It was staring at you in big, bold red font. But your stomach twisted a bit in anxiety as you scrolled down the article recounting what witnesses had said to the tabloid. There were quotes in the same bold font saying how you guys seemed really “happy”, “cozy”, and “familiar with each other.” And of course there was a short clip of him whispering into your ear while you hugged and gently scratched at his back at the coffee shop. Also of you glancing up at him and the both of you smiling when you joked with him about having visible boogies… you smiled at the memory but you knew that what would surely come next when the both of you gave no real explanation to this. Towards the bottom of it there was one more photo, one of the only ones ever taken of you two a couple years into your relationship. You guys had been walking back to his house in London after having some lunch. It explained how it seemed that you guys had been familiar at some point and maybe you’d lost touch but were back in touch after the MET.

JENNY L:

I already have a few reporters reaching out for commentary. Please tell me you guys didn’t do something bad…

Y/N:

No, don’t worry about this. Taylor actually broke up with him after a MET after party. There was an incident, I’ll call and explain when I get home. We’re in the car service right now on our way back from LAX.

JENNY L:

For sure. 

Y/N:

I’ll also call Harry and see what his team is going to do.

JENNY L:

For now don’t. I’ll get in touch with Jeffrey and Tommy. I know they’ll want to isolate him from this as much as possible. I’ll be standing by for your phone call.

Y/N:

Sounds good. Talk soon!

Jenny “hearted” your message and you guys drove off to your place in silence. Caitlyn had left her car at your place and since Sebastian and you had broken up she decided to keep some things at your place for impromptu sleep overs. So as soon as you got in she went to get some more sleep in the guest bedroom while you called Jenny and explained what had happened the night before. It hadn’t been anything bad, but you then explained what Caitlyn had shared about how Harry and Taylor were struggling with getting back on track after he admitted he had feelings for you.

“…so yeah, there wasn’t anything fishy per se apart from that. We actually hadn’t even spoken since we saw each other last year. Taylor never attempted to contact me or anything either, we don’t even know each other. Just that little run-in in the bathroom which no one saw.” You shared with Jenny, “So uh, no connections there either.”

“Okay, sounds good. Already the fans are labeling you a home wrecker, they really liked them together.”

“Yeah, I was expecting that.” You sighed.

“Oh, Jeffrey just texted me!” Jenny said and opened it up, “Okay he said that Harry wants to clarify that you have been close friends since you were 19 years old but that he’s not all that sure that they should do that because you guys having a history could mean more of a logical framework for any theories of cheating.”

“Yeah, like we were so close that it eventually led to that…” you said, “I mean we could just both go no comment. I know we didn’t do anything wrong so… ”

“Yeah, I agree. I guess Harry doesn’t want to “hide you from his life” is what Jeff just said.” She shared and you bit your lip.

“I think I need to talk to Harry ,this is something he feels like he might owe me for. When we dated, I mean, you know…we were both so worried about the public ruining it for us. He did tell me that he felt bad that he let his fear of what others might think get in the way of us living our lives. And that it sometimes felt like we never happened because everything was so hidden. He said he wished that everyone could’ve seen how happy we make each other. He could be wanting to make up for that…”

“Mmmm, okay. Let me tell Jeffrey to get him on the line, we can do a group call or FaceTime?”

“Yeah, that’s alright.” You assured her.

“Okay I’ll call you back.”

“Yeah.” 

A few minutes later a call was coming in with the three of them and Jenny, and you guys started to discuss. Tommy said that he had tried to get in touch with Taylor’s team but she didn’t want to weigh in on anything as she was still dealing with the decision to break up with him. Harry understood that, so they weren’t going to get a confirmation from her any time soon that she had ended the relationship.

“H, I completely understand why you want to release that statement but I think it’ll only perpetuate the idea that we were doing things behind her back.”

“I just don’t want to hide that you make me happy anymore.” He sighed.

“We’re not, I mean the pictures are everywhere.” You said with a small smile, “People can see it but we don’t owe them any explanations about it. I don’t think we should address speculations.”

“Yeah, yeah you’re right.” He finally agreed and everyone looked relieved.

“I think if we gradually increase your time together it might make it look more natural?” Tommy suggested.

“What about private photos? What if we have an “iCloud leak”-”

“Absolutely not.” Harry cut Jenny off.

“Well Harry, that might establish what you want without having to say anything.” Jeffrey explained.

“We could choose what we release. Just things from birthdays or shows, parties…” you suggested, “We could show them this is nothing new, that we were always like this.” You smiled.

“Okay, fine…I mean, even Caitlyn has some stuff on her instagram from years ago…I was…looking.” He said and you smiled. “Oh shut it…” he chuckled as you all laughed.

“She’s on private though…always has been.” You reminded and he hummed.

“What if she’s the one that gets “hacked”. People are starting to look into who she is as well. I already saw one article that identified that she’s a screenwriter, I’m sure more people will be trying to see how she’s linked.” Jeffrey chimed in.

“I’ll have to ask her…I don’t want her to give up her privacy for us.” You said and Harry agreed.

“Well I think that would be the best case if she gives us access to her instagram and iCloud. But if not, then we just do the iCloud leak from one of your accounts.” Jeffrey decided. “Start looking through your pictures guys.”

You guys agreed on this strategy and you agreed you’d ask Caitlyn when she woke up. Of course, your best friend listened with an open mind and wasn’t even reluctant to agree and help you guys out. She knew that you guys had messed up when you saw each other that first time, but your commitment to let each other try and live your own lives really showed her that you guys regretted betraying your partners, so of course she wanted to help you both now. When she checked her instagram there were already tons of DM’s and follow requests waiting for her. She wasn’t even verified, she really just used this for personal things, so it would be understandable if she got hacked now that she was connected to you and Harry. Over the next few days your teams figured out the logistics of this plan and Caitlyn shared with you and Harry any pictures that she had of you guys on her iCloud and then a few weeks later the “leak” happened. 

Screenshots of Caitlyn's grid were taken and leaked on twitter from years back and it worked. People were immediately finding what you guys wanted them to find. Then two days later the “iCloud leak” happened. With this stunt, a solid timeline of your and Caitlyn’s friendship with Harry was established. There weren’t too many photos but the ones that fans were circulating the most were the ones of you two with Harry while he was still in the band. Of you guys at Caitlyn’s 25th birthday party with you and Harry kissing her cheek on either side. There was a video of you and Harry doing karaoke, a couple of pictures and a video of Caitlyn and Harry at your first big, sold out show in London. And finally one of him painting your nails with a prototype of what fans soon discovered was now the Pleasing polish “inky pearl”. It had to appear as though “the hacker” had intentionally dug through years of things to find this specific content. And once those were out into the world the tune changed and people thought it was cute that you guys had been friends for that long. People were saying that you guys appeared to be really into each other even back then and that you would make a cute couple.

Naturally, that started shifting the narrative into “maybe Harry dumped Taylor and was just out with his old friends to cheer up a bit”, which was mostly right. But once that became the main rumor an anonymous source leaked to a few gossip news outlets that Taylor had actually been the one to dump Harry the night of the MET. Obviously, Harry and Tommy had been in on that with her representatives because they didn’t want her looking like the chump when she had been the one that did the dumping. And once that came out the internet went wild and people were overwhelmed with the knowledge that his old friends truly were comforting him after a break up and that Taylor had dumped Harry because they were “growing apart”. 

You were fine, but having that all out there in print is what really seemed to make it real for Harry and he started to disappear a bit. You knew he needed space and time to process and heal, so you gave it. You didn’t want to bug him or make him feel pressured, so you assured him that he didn’t have to talk to you if he wasn’t in the mood. But if he didn’t mind, you’d just check in every few days, say hi, send some encouragements and he agreed to that. It was all very one sided as the months inched by and boy, did you miss him, but he really needed to get through this on his own terms.

…. August 2024 ���.

Harry’s POV:

When Taylor returned to London in early June to pick up her things from his place it was extremely bittersweet for him to see how she looked so much lighter in terms of her mood and persona as a whole. She didn’t look tired or stressed how she had towards the end of their relationship. She looked more like herself and even sounded like herself, all bubbly and optimistic about things. It made him feel really happy for her, but it also made him sad, knowing that he contributed to her unhappiness. Knowing that he had hurt her enough to dull the gorgeous and bright person that she had been before. The person that he had fallen in love with. He even tried to kiss her when she was leaving and nearly died of embarrassment when she rejected him, but he understood.

He and Tommy did share the PR plan you guys made and assured her that you were cautious in trying to keep her out of it as much as possible. But he heard from her again when the public brought her into the picture and she wanted to set the record straight and he agreed that she should, he didn’t mind it. But once all of it felt resolved he just crashed. 

He stopped talking to you around the second week of June because he just didn’t have the energy. But you had been kind and checked in, assuring him he didn’t need to answer, but you just wanted to encourage him a bit. It meant the world to him that you understood to keep doing that, but still giving him the space he needed to get through this. For months now he had allowed himself to feel it, like you told him he needed to do. And god, it hurt…it hurt so much, but it was relieving to have felt it all. The sadness had faded seemingly very suddenly, he just woke up one day and didn’t feel hopeless. He missed you though, he wanted to see you so badly but he had no idea when too soon was “too soon”. 

Y/N:

This popped up on my pinterest feed! IT’S YOU! Lololol. I laughed so hard and it’s so, so cute. I hope today is better 💛

Harry’s head knocked back as he laughed at the little image on his screen. It really was him and the fact that even the text said “Feel it all” was extremely fateful. He smiled and “hearted” the message before setting his phone down on the counter and turned to go make himself some coffee. Seconds later he came back and unlocked his phone and texted his assistant to book him a one-way ticket to LA for next week.

****************

Y/N POV:

Your summer had been very nice so far. You genuinely were not worried about Harry in the slightest, you knew that healing took time and he knew well that you’d be waiting whenever he was ready. After seeing the way things worked out after the MET, you had a restored sense of hope in fate and the universe, so you let it be. For the time being you were having a lot of fun in the studio working on some new things. You were also spending a lot of time with friends and with Ricky too. You guys were just enjoying what you had going on. It wasn’t a routine at all, your hookups were sporadic and spontaneous, like now…

“Oh fuck yes, right there!” You mewled as his long fingers prodded into your g-spot as his thumb glided over your clit over and over at the perfect pace.

“Shhh…” he chuckled as he looked around briefly. You were in a hidden little nook at the studio. Everyone had gone for lunch but someone could always come in at any moment. “Look so fucking pretty today. You wore it for me, didn’t you?” He mumbled against your lips and you smiled.

“F'ourse.” You panted and then inhaled sharply as your walls fluttered around his fingers as your orgasm neared. It always took longer for you to come standing, so you’d been there a while. “I’m getting close…fuck, faster!” You implored and he listened and started pumping his fingers faster until your legs were trembling. Your head knocked back against the wall and you huffed out a laugh at the thud, but it wasn’t enough to deter you from coming.

“Come for me, Y/N.”

“Yeah, jus’don’t stop…don’t stop…oh my god, I’m coming!” Your moan broke through your throat and he brought his other hand over your mouth to mute your sounds. Your arms hugged around him to keep yourself upright as your knees went weak and shook at the waves of pleasure coursing through you. Your walls were pulsing rapidly around his fingers as you rode it out. He removed his hand from your mouth as you started panting and wrapped it around your waist while his fingers continued fucking into you slowly to help you ease off of your climax. You angled up and kissed his lips before smiling giddily, your eyes all sparkly and heavy with lust.

“Y’good now?” He asked with a grin after a minute or two and you nodded.

“Yeah.” You confirmed and he let go of you and pulled out his fingers before sucking them clean. 

He tugged your skirt back down to where it was before your little romp session. Your lips met eagerly for several moments, smearing together and connecting fervently. As much as you wanted to, you couldn’t return the favor now, there wasn’t time. So you kissed him to show your gratitude for his immediate attention to your obvious need. 

“So after the afternoon session do you want t-” you paused when you thought you heard a door close.

“What’s-”

“Shhh.” You shushed him quickly and he froze as you definitely heard some movement in the control room. 

“Maybe they’re just grabbing something?” He whispered and you both stayed quiet trying to hear anything else, whoever it was wasn’t leaving.

“Where’s my underwear?” You asked him and he patted at his pocket and then glanced around to find that they had not stayed in his pocket.

“I think they fell out of my pocket in the live room somewhere.” He said and you groaned quietly. He peeked out a bit and saw them near the large amp you’d been sitting on before you moved into this little nook. “They fell out near the amp.” He said regretfully and you swore your brain melted from how embarrassed you were. If anyone walked into the live room they would surely see them. And then the worst thing that could happen did, you both heard the soft creak of the door to the live room opening.

“Shit!” You whispered and decided to just get out there. Maybe you could grab them before they even noticed and hurry out to the bathroom and Ricky would just stay hidden until the coast was clear. “OK, I’m gonna grab them. Just stay until I come get you.” You whispered and he nodded. You exhaled shakily and then stepped out of your little corner only see Harry Styles himself stop as he approached the piano bench, thankfully on the other side of the room. He smiled wide as soon as he saw you.

“Surprise!” He exclaimed through a chuckle and you reared back a bit, at least to kick your panties behind the amp so he wouldn’t see them on the floor. “Why are you backing away, come here!” He chuckled and you glanced down quickly to see they were hidden enough before hurrying over to him.

“W-what’re you doing here?” You asked him with a smile as he sighed and hugged around you and then squeezed a bit tighter. You were completely flustered now and distracted and he could feel the weirdness you were exuding as you cut your hug short.

“I just wanted to surprise you.” He explained and you nodded.

“That’s really sweet of you.” You said and he chuckled as he took you in for a moment.

“Are you OK?” He asked and you nodded quickly.

“Of course!”

“Are you sure? I mean, I know I kind of just showed up but I was expecting a little more enthusiasm form you after not seeing each other for months.” He chuckled and then the next worst thing happened, Ricky’s phone started ringing. Of course he had to have Patrick Star saying “Leedle-leedle-leedle-lee” as his ringtone. Your face fell into your hands in absolute mortification as Harry burst into laughter at the very random interruption, “Is that your ringtone?” He gasped through his laugh and you shook your head, still hiding your face in your hands. “Oh. Then…” he sighed and you glanced up at him, “Oh…” he said more quietly and you exhaled.

“Ummm, Ricky it’s fine. It’s Harry.” You said and he stepped out from the little hidden corner seconds later. He looked between you and Harry with painfully embarrassed smile. But he inhaled sharply and pushed the feelings aside.

“Hello Harry, I’m Ricky.” He said extending his hand out and you winced.

“Mmmm, maybe don’t do that right now.” You said softly and he glanced down at his hand and then pulled it back once he realized that he had just used that same hand to finger fuck you.

“Right, ummm…”

“Just, come here.” You said as you went behind him and gabbed his arms to corral him out of the studio and to the bathrooms. “And you, stay here please.” You called back at Harry who just nodded, still quite shocked at what he’d walked into and moments later you had emerged into the hall and exhaled shakily.

“Oh god, that was bad! That was so bad!” He panted nervously.

“I know! Fuck…”

“Did you get your underwear.”

“No! He was already in there, I just kicked them behind the amp.” You explained. “Look, I ummm, I think I need to talk to him alone for a little. Just go wash up and let everyone know to take another thirty or so?”

“Yeah, OK.” He nodded and then chuckled, “I’m sorry to put you in this position.”

“It’s fine, I was the one that was too impatient to wait until after.” You reminded and he chuckled.

“True…” he mused with a grin, “Ummm, well you go deal with that and I’ll go stall everyone a little.”

“Thank you.” You breathed out and then inhaled slowly.

“Hey, it’s gonna be fine. OK?” He smiled and you nodded with your bottom lip bitten beneath your front teeth out of nerves, you needed to take it out on something, “Go on.” He insisted and you turned around and headed back into the studio. When you entered the control room and looked out the large window into the live room Harry glanced back at you from his seat on the piano bench. You headed back in a bit timidly and he smiled at you.

“You alright?”

“Yeah! Sorry about that, it just…happened.” You explained bashfully and he nodded.

“Yeah, I get that.” He smiled, “S’good to put a face to the name.”

“Oh yeah…” you hummed and shook your head again. Harry chuckled and reached for your hand before hesitating.

“Is your hand clean?” He asked before grabbing it and you chuckled but nodded. “OK.” He hummed and stood before grabbing both of your hands and running his thumbs over your knuckles. “I’m fine.” He assured you, “Well…maybe fuming inside…just a little…” he confessed.

“Don’t worry, it was just that, not sex, m’not that crazy.”

“And I wonder whose idea that was, you little exhibitionist.” You teased and you shook your head as you giggled.

“Either way, ummm I am happy you’re here.” You said, “So can we have a do over?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Of course.” He said and released your hands before wrapping them around your shoulders and pulling you in. You hugged around him and leaned into him.

“I’m really happy to see you. Missed you.” 

“Me too.”

“So what made you come out here?” You asked and he pulled back a bit, his hands grabbed your face gently.

“The froggy picture.” He admitted and you laughed and he bit his lip as he watched you laugh. You were so pretty, he was glad he saved seeing you again for the first time for this face to face encounter.

“When I saw that little cardigan on him I just about died.” You recalled, giggled at the memory. “It’s so cute.”

“Yeah, it was cute.” He agreed, “You look so pretty today.” He complimented.

“Thanks. You too.” You hummed and he chuckled.

“Mmm…particularly like you in this skirt. Though it is a bit skimpy…” he pointed out and you smiled.

“Yeah, s’quite short.” You agreed.

“Then you might be…” he reached down and hooked on his index finger was your underwear, “needing these back.” He hummed and you felt your face heating in embarrassment as you glanced over to them and then to him. He was smirking and you reached for them and he raised them out of your reach. “Mmm…just a little higher, love.” 

“If I reach any higher my ass will show.” You laughed and he did as well.

“So unprofessional…” he mumbled and you rolled your eyes before looking deep into his eyes pleadingly.

“Please.” You insisted, “Would love it if I didn’t flash anyone at work today.” You said and he chuckled and lowered them so that you could reach for them but then pulled them away from you. 

“May I?” He asked and you bit your lip. He smirked at your response, “I’ll take that as a yes.” He hummed and stepped forwards, effectively backing you up until you bumped into the piano, the higher keys at the end clanked discordantly as your weight pressed them down and your gazes met as you both sniggered in amusement at the happy little accident. The sound seemed to reverberate forever, that’s how tense it was between you two. He crouched down and spread them out for you, allowing you to step into them as he stood and pulled them up your legs and finally over your center. He really tried his best not to look or lean in when he got them up to your pussy. He knew you were wet, but it was not from what he had walked in on, it was all for him. It probably had been all along, he didn’t want to assume, but he hoped. He really hoped. “There you are.” He hummed as his fingers fixed the straps along your hips, tugging on them a bit to straighten them out.

“Thank you.” You said softly.

“Of course.” He smiled as he fixed your skirt again and placed his hands on your hips. You suddenly smiled even wider and he giggled, “What’s that cute little smile about, then?”

“Nothing. Just thinking that you’ve never… I don’t think you’ve ever done that before?” You shrugged.

“Mmm…surely I have.” He mused, his face scrunching a bit in thought, “Or not…maybe not…” he decided a few seconds later. “I’m glad I was clever enough to pull it off.”

“Oh yeah, that was…a moment.”

“Core memory?” He smirked.

“Oh yeah, core memory.” You smiled and just hugged him again and he hummed happily, “You’re staying, right?”

“Yeah, if you want me to.” He mumbled and you pulled back.

“Yeah, of course. Could use some of your expertise. A little Styles sparkle.” You flirted.

“I like that!” He chuckled, “M’stealing it.”

“Okay.” You giggled. “Caitlyn’s friend, Melissa, from the pilates studio? Well she’s my friend too kinda, but more Cait’s. Either way, she’s having a little pool party with cocktails. It’s a casual thing. If you wanna come, I’m sure we’ll end up ordering in.”

“Oh yeah, that sounds nice.” He smiled. “I-is Ricky coming?” He asked.

“Ummm, maybe? If you don’t mind?” He shook his head and you squinted your eyes suspiciously.

“I swear.” He chuckled.

“OK.” You said softly. You let each other go and then grabbed your phone from a music stand a few feet away. 

“Have you eaten?” He asked

“Nope.”

“Want to go pick something up together?” He asked and you nodded.

“Sure.” You said and soon you were heading off to the closest thing before heading back to the studio with your food.

It was nice sitting with him while you two ate and talked casually about your music and what you wanted out of it. You were trying to find the words to describe what you wanted this project to be and what you wanted it to evoke. You missed talking to him about this kind of thing. Harry just had a real gift for expressing everything he was trying to express when he made his music. And at the moment, you felt like your vision just wasn’t cohesive, or at least you felt that way.

“…I don’t know, I’m a bit lost on this process, I guess.” You decided finally when you started bouncing between ideas, “I don’t even know why I wanted to do an album anymore…” you confessed with some sadness.

“What initially pushed you to decide?”

“I think seeing you, the weird things with Seb…I mean, I just feel kind of like things have taken a twist I didn’t expect. And I’m just…lost. I feel lost, even though I shouldn’t be. I feel like what I need to do next in life is kinda a no brainer, but-”

“A no brainer to who?” He asked and you shrugged, “Everyone I guess. But I also feel…like…I’m in a glass house.” You said and he hummed, “I feel like everything right now is really fragile right now. With my heart and my head…with this album, I know that it’s been a while so I need t-to deliver, I mean obviously. And then w-with us too.” You explained and he hummed, “I just don’t even know where to start to be honest. And I think…that shows in the music. It’s going to be a big, fat flop.” You chuckled sadly, “I can just feel it. It’s murky…”

“I mean, you always know what I think. At the end of the day you have to like what you produced. And you have to be proud of it. I get that we do this for a living, but it’s also our entire heart and mind in those songs. All the things we’ve dealt with during this time, the joys the sorrows…I mean, that’s what we’re putting out there for everyone to judge and feeling like it doesn’t make sense anymore can be scary. But honestly, things don’t make sense for a lot people out there, and hearing that just might help them feel not so shitty about it.” He said and you hummed.

“Is it crazy that I really want to embrace another sound? I don’t even know what it falls under, but I just want it to sound exactly how I hear it in my brain.” You explained, “Like…” you paused and chuckled, “there are lines I wrote while I was like at the grocery store or stuck in traffic, and like I can only hear them in that setting. Like just to show how banal my life is, you know? Like, I want to put in the beep of the check out machine in or staticky radio chatter about the heat wave, my alarm going off in the morning, the chirp of the fire alarm I haven’t changed…I was thinking of maybe putting in some like voice notes between the tracks, like texts with friends, or little things I make to remember what I need to buy at the store. Like I want it to be like a day through my perspective I guess…almost like the music is narrating a routine?” You explained and he nodded and smiled.

“I think that’s really cool.” He said and you bit your lip.

“It’s not too…messy and chaotic?”

“No, it is for sure, the layering is going to be insane.” He said and you chuckled and nodded, “But it’s a cool concept. Like basically if your life was a kind of like a musical.” He said and your eyes widened.

“Exactly.” You sighed and smiled, “Wow…who knew a word for that already existed.” You chuckled and he did as well, “I was struggling for a while there trying to describe what I wanted. Thank you!” You said and he chuckled.

“Happy to help.”

When everyone returned you shared a more clear idea of what it was that you wanted. You wanted things to be a little odd but as real as possible. This helped your producers and sound engineers adjust what they were doing a bit to make editing easier on themselves. At some point Harry was at the help of the control panel, pressing buttons and raising and lowering settings, asking you to go again.

“Hey man, how about in that bit there where she ends the bridge, she does the final chorus in an octave lower and we fade it out from studio into the raw audio. I believe this is one of the songs where the demo is from her voice notes.” Ricky suggested and Harry smiled.

“Yeah actually, that’s sick.” He nodded and then he told you what Ricky was thinking. “He says we can layer them and blend it, so just try the chorus in a lower octave and the rest will be done via editing.” He instructed and gave him a thumbs up before running it again. 

After another couple of hours of working, your day was coming to an end. Everyone started cleaning up after themselves and you invited Ricky to Melissa’s place and soon he was heading off and assuring you he’d be there later. Harry was chatting with one of the other sound engineers, Billy, as you looked around the space one final time to ensure you weren’t leaving anything behind for the night.

“I was just telling Harry that now what you were asking of us makes a lot more sense.” Billy said and you chuckled.

“See. I wasn’t crazy!”  

“Yeah… it’s gonna be cool, what you’re doing.”

“Thank you. I think so too. I mean, I know I enjoy those kinds of things when I listen to music, so I hope others like it as well.”

“Oh yeah, people are suckers for that.” He smiled, “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Billy said to you, “And it was nice to meet you.” He said to Harry, “Will you be joining us again?”

“Ummm…” Harry said as he glanced over to you.

“Well, you’re always welcome. You know that.” You said to him and he smiled.

“Then I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” He said and Billy chuckled. You guys exchanged a few more words before Billy headed out.

“So where are you staying?” You asked as you put things into your tote bag.

“Not sure yet. I don’t know how long I’m staying for, so I didn’t want to book a hotel indefinitely, you know?”

“Yeah, I get that.” You hummed, “Well if you need a place to crash for a bit I’ve got an extra room. Caitlyn already claimed one room.” You said and he chuckled.

“Of course she has…” he grinned and you smiled, “Well yeah, if it’s no bother. And like, I know that I came for you-”

“That’s what she said.” You slipped in and he laughed and rolled his eyes as you giggled.

“Real funny…now, I know that I came here to see you, but I’d also understand if you didn’t want me in your house.” He chuckled.

“I’d love you in my house.” You said and he smiled.

“Then let’s get going.” He responded and you grinned.

*****************

“Welcome!” You chirped as you opened the back door to let Harry in with his big ass suitcase.

“Thanks.” He chuckled.

“Do you remember where my room is?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, well yours is the one right beside it.” You said and he nodded and took off. You put your bag down to wash the tumbler you used for your coffee that morning. And after that you headed off to get changed. When you passed by Harry was just stripping off his pants and you turned away quickly before rushing into your room. You first got your shirt off and then got your make up off. You’d be swimming anyway, so it was pointless to have it on. Once you got done with that you went to pick out a bathing suit which you quickly changed into. You were throwing your skirt back on when Harry announced himself. “What’s up?” You asked and he came over to your closet.

“Nothing, just wondering what was taking you so long.”

“Oh, sorry. I was taking off my makeup. Let me just grab a shirt.” You said and just grabbed the first one within reach and threw it on. You slid your feet into your sandals and then tugged at his shirt as you breezed past him. “Let’s go.”

“Hey…hey, hey, hey come here.” He said reaching around you and stopping you as you giggled.

“What?” You asked him and he just hugged you and released a long exhale. You smiled and rubbed over his back softly, fingers dancing across his shirt as you held him for a little while. 

“I’m really happy to be here.” He spoke quietly.

“Oh me too, H. I missed you a lot. It was getting hard not to hear from you.” You spoke softly before tiptoeing and kissing low on his cheek. His lips twitched up in a little smile and you ran your thumb over his bottom lip. He kissed the pad of your thumb a couple times before letting you go and grabbing your face, pulling you in closer to him.

“Can I?” He asked and you nodded quickly. 

Just a moment later his lips were pushing and pulling against your own slowly in a deep and emotional kiss. It was nostalgic and magical; your body felt alive and tingly all over. Moreover, the raw emotion of the tension finally bursting was overwhelming in the best way. It felt like you had just jumped into a cool pool on a hot summer’s day. You were so in the moment that you forgot to breathe, so you suddenly pulled back to do so. And his mouth chased after yours, pecking around your lips as you inhaled sharply. When your eyes blinked open and met his, you smiled and his cheeks went all warm and pink. Suddenly you were transported back to the time when you had kissed for the very first time. He was smiling then too, relieved to have kissed you. And you were in mental shambles as you relished in what had just happened. It felt like the beginning again. He started to pull back and you arched up and kissed him again.

“Not yet.” You whispered and he sighed and pulled you closer. His thumbs stroked over your cheeks as your lips met over and over again in soft little pecks in between deep kisses. Your noses nuzzled against each other for a few seconds.

“D’you wanna drive?”

“Yeah, sure.” You smiled and were heading off a few minutes later.

****************

Harry was actually having a nice time at this pool party/dinner thing. He was glad he had come because he needed the distraction. He was afraid of the conversation he was going to have with you about polyamory and how he believed that he fit under this category. He was nervous because of how this had impacted his previous relationship. He had spent the past couple months talking to his therapist every couple of weeks on the phone to help him through the depression and grief of his relationship. His therapist mentioned that a friend of hers is a sex therapist and she asked him if he would be interested in having her come sit in on a few of their sessions and then take the lead for a few about this new discovery he had made about himself and he agreed and he would be meeting her for the first time the following day.

He had also been keeping a keen eye on the interactions between you and Ricky. Ricky and him kept making awkward eye contact and he was acting really relaxed with you. He figured it was because Ricky was a bit intimidated or still feeling weird about him walking in on you guys. Either way, Harry was being more of a spectator for now.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” You asked as you came up to him after emerging from the pool.

“Nothing, just watching everyone. Thinking…”

“About?”

“Me. You. Us…” he said as he made space on the big chaise lounge he was on. 

He patted the space beside him and you climbed on, legs crossed as you faced him and you extended your hand out towards his and just grazed your fingers over his own discreetly before pulling away. This little gesture transported Harry back to your fifth date. He remembered it so clearly, you guys had gone out to eat and even though you had a private dinging area, he still wouldn’t hold your hand because he was worried that someone might see and then it would all get out and things would surely go to shit. He remembered because he did that same gesture to you that you’d just done to him. Just a feather of a touch to ease your need and want to be closer to him in that moment. 

“Did you feel…invalidated when we were together?” He asked, seemingly out of the blue and you hummed pensively. “Like not seen or maybe…less important than you were to me?”

“Maybe a little bit at the start but it went away quickly. I knew it was because of the band and all those crazy rules they had for you guys.” You said and he nodded, “But after all that ended I was expecting you to change a little bit? Lax up about being together in public and things like that.” You explained, “I didn’t feel like you hid us because I wasn’t good enough for you. I know all that was sort of a deal breaker for you then, so I just went along with it because I mean, I hadn’t dated anyone with your level of fame before. I just figured you knew the best way to deal and go about that.” You shrugged and he hummed.

“What you did just now, touched my hand?” He said and you nodded, urging him to continue, “I did that to you, on our fifth date. You just wanted to hold my hand over the table top at the restaurant.” He chuckled sadly, “And I wouldn’t. Do you remember?” 

“Vaguely.”

“We were in some tiny little private dining room…” he reminded you.

“Oh yeah…” you hummed.

“I’m sorry.”

“For?”

“That.” He said and you hummed. “I wish I had been braver. And I feel the same now. I think if I had listened to other people and been more open and braver about the things I think or feel sometimes then maybe I wouldn’t be so carelessly hurtful towards others.”

“You’re not a hurtful person, H. At least not intentionally. You have concerns and fears and doubts like everyone else and sometimes that can affect how you relate to and interact with others. But I mean, you dealt with things the best way you knew how at the time, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then, good. You did your best to protect what we had and I trusted you and your approach. I don’t hold it against you.” You said and he nodded.

“So just now then, you didn’t do that because you’re like…conditioned to be unaffectionate towards me in public?” He asked and you smiled and shook your head.

“No, it was just a little reassuring thing.”

“Okay.” He smiled, “You can, by the way. I want to hold your hand.” He said as he reached for yours resting flat over your thigh.

“Oh, like right now?” 

“Yeah. Can I?” He asked.

“Yeah, if you want to.” You smiled.

“Do you want me to though?”

“Yeah!” You laughed a bit and he smiled and pulled your hand into the small space between your bodies. His fingers intertwined with yours and you smiled up at him.

The one thing that you kept feeling was eager anticipation. You loved Harry at the core of who he was and every part of him that you’d known and experienced over the years. The prospect of getting to know him again, this version of him that you were the most unfamiliar with, it was exciting. Even just being around him you felt in tune, on the same wave length as him. When your gazes met you felt curiosity and interest in understanding what was going on in his brain in a far deeper way than before. You’d happily spend the rest of your days learning about him and loving who he was now and who he would become over time. You smiled to yourself as you thought of him in 10-15 years, with you. Happy, fulfilled, it was making you emotional.

“Hey, what’s on your mind?” He asked softly.

“You.” You responded, you didn’t mean for it to come out as a whisper, but it did. You were just so in your head now as you gave thought to all of this. To all of him.

“What about me? You seem like you’re about to cry.” He said lowly with a bit of concern.

“They’d be happy tears then.” You assured him and he smiled. “Was just thinking about you, how far you’ve come. Well, the both of us, and how I’m jus so excited t-to get to know you again. And just thinking about the future, like…what we can have. Like…we’re different than…five years ago, you know?”

“Yeah, a little more grown up.” He smiled.

“A lot more grown up.” You chuckled, “And I think it could only get better the older we get.” You said and he smiled.

“It will.” He said decisively, “I’m also excited about getting to know you in a deeper way again.” He said and you smiled as a comfortable silence took over for a minute or so. But then he spoke up again, “Honestly, I don’t think there’s a reality in which I wouldn’t be in love with you.” He confessed with a bashful smile and your gaze softened as it met his own, “I mean that.”

“I know. I feel the same way.” You responded, your heart was pounding so hard you felt it in your throat. 

Harry just smiled and let his thumb smooth over your knuckles as you just looked at each other. His eyes flickered between your own, taking in every possible detail. He loved how the sun streaks showed off the pattern of your irises. He loved how you looked back at him with so much adoration. He wanted everything with you. He couldn’t even contain the fluttering feeling in his tummy as he thought about you when you had a baby with him and looked at them the way you were looking at him now. With love, acceptance, pride, and every other good feeling and intention you could muster up.

“I need you to know that we’re making it this time.” He whispered and you nodded.

“Yeah we are.” You whispered back with a smile.

*********************

You were quite nervous as you made it back from the studio the next day. You’d had a great and productive day and you hoped Harry had too. You were feeling a vast range of emotions as you tried to picture where the conversation would end up. Especially after the intimate things you had told each other the evening before. You had even called your mom on your lunch break to just get all the irrational, anxiety inducing things off of your chest. She was excited for the possibility of you and Harry working things out after all this time. She and your father loved how he looked after you and were very supportive of your relationship with him back then and it was no different now, he and his family had left a really great impression on them. And your family on his, you still spoke to Anne and Gemma and a few of his cousins for birthdays and little things like that. Obviously, you kept a respectful distance, especially since he dated quite quickly after, but you had grown to love the people in his life too. 

“Hello?” You spoke out into the car when you answered his incoming call.

“Hey, love. Just checking if I can open any of the wine bottles you have? Or are some special?”

“Nah, have at it.” You assured him.

“Perfect. Are you close by?”

“Yeah, about 10 minutes away.”

“Great! See you soon.” He hummed, “Be safe.”

“Thanks, H.” You hummed and he hung up.

*****************

As soon as you made it inside you were greeted with an absolutely divine aroma and “Always Alright” by Alabama Shakes was playing from the kitchen. You bopped your head along as you pushed the door back and it landed into the frame with a loud thump.

“I’m home!” You called out as you toed out of your sneakers and just as you were about to make it to the living room Harry was coming to the entrance with a glass of wine for you in hand. 

“Hey, how was it today?”

“Good, we wrapped up the ones that might be the singles so it was a productive day.” You said with a smiled as you guys hugged briefly and kissed cheeks.

“That’s great.” He hummed as he handed over the glass and you thanked him softly before taking a sip.

“Mmmm.” Your eyebrows perked up as the sour and crisp wine tingled on your tongue. “Which one did you open?” You only had three bottles of white wines as it wasn’t your favorite variety. So the flavors of it were not as obvious to you.

“The chablis.” 

“Oh…good choice.” You complimented and he smiled.

“Yeah?” You nodded and he hummed. “Well c’mon then.” He said and you followed after him to the kitchen.

“How was your day?” You asked.

“Also quite productive. I found two potential places, so there’s that.”

“And in therapy?”

“Really good too.” He smiled and you nodded.

“Good. I’m glad.” You hummed, “Do you need my help with anything?”

“No, just sit. Wanna plate it all nice for you.” He said and you smiled.

“Wow, thank you.” 

“Of course.” He smiled as he plated up the baby potato and veg mix on the plate and then he lifted the sheet of tin foil placed over the pan on the stove, “They had some really great sea bass fillets at Erewhon. I couldn’t resist.” He hummed.

“How much did they cost you?” You asked with a grin and he chuckled.

“I’m not ready to talk about it.” He mumbled with a smirk and you giggled. “Here you are love.” He said handing you a plate and you grabbed it quickly.

“Wow, so beautiful.” You complimented, “The skin is so crisp.” You slightly moaned as you ran your fork over it. “I’m so excited to eat this.” You praised him and bit down on your lip in excitement. Harry grinned bashfully as he served up his own plate and soon he was settling in beside you and then you guys started eating. You made some light conversation and hummed to the music playing in the background of your conversation while you guys ate your dinner. Everything was so delicious you even went in for another helping of the veggies. “Wow…this is may be on of the best things I’ve eaten in a long time.” You said in satisfaction. “The fish was so buttery. It just melted in your mouth…damn.” You smiled, “You did so good! I’m so impressed.” You chuckled.

“Yeah?” He smiled as he reached for your hand and you nodded again. “Glad you liked it. Got the recipe from Shellie.” He said and you hummed.

“Ooh nice. She’s a good cook.” You recalled and he nodded.

“And I made some cereal milk panna cotta for desert. Should be set by now.”

“Ooh, fancy!” You chirped with excitement. You washed the remaining dishes as he brought out the panna cottas and then headed over to your patio, he balanced the little ramekins in one hand as he unlatched the glass door and slid it open and stepped outside. You dried your hands and grabbed your glasses of wine as you headed over as well and cozied into one of the seats outside.

“So?” You asked and he smiled at you.

“So…I think that I’ve finally come to terms with the fact that I am probably polyamorous.” He explained and you nodded in understanding.

“Okay and what does that…look like for you?” You asked him.

“Ummm…for me it’s largely about the fact that I can connect romantically with multiple people simultaneously. I have felt it before but just thought of it as like a crush…because I had never fully fallen in love with any of those people or just stopped myself from talking to them more because I was already seeing someone. And I mean, to me, you’re the biggest love of my life. And when we didn’t work I just…I wanted to feel that way again and so I searched for it and I did fall in love with Olivia and Taylor all w-while being in love with you the entire time. I see now that I buried what I felt for you, but it was never gone.” He explained and you nodded in understanding, “I told Taylor once that she wasn’t competing with you for my love, that I loved you and loved her in your own unique ways. D-does that make sense to you?”

“Yeah, H. It does.” You assured as you dipped into your panna cotta and he hummed ‘good’ before he did the same. You sat silently for a little bit, watching the sun starting to move closer and closer to the horizon.

“And say, what if we get married and somewhere along the way I…fall in love with someone else? Can you accept that?” He asked and you shrugged.

“I can tell you that I can right now…but I mean, maybe that will change if we get married or have kids or something…” you said with all honesty. “But I mean, i-if that’s how it is then I’d expect to have boundaries or rules for what’s acceptable if we’re the married ones.”

“Yeah, I get that.” He nodded, “So, my therapist brought in a friend of hers, a sex therapist, t-to talk about this with me. To answer any questions and to help prep me for this talk I wanted to have with you.” He explained and you nodded urging him to go on, “So poly people can have different types of relationships and she was explaining them to me to see what resonated with me the most and I think a hierarchal approach or a polyfidelity approach is more in line with me.” He explained and you nodded.

“Okay, so what does that mean?”

“So in the hierarchal one the main relationship is the priority. So say we started a relationship, to me that would be my main relationship. If I met anyone who I was interested in I would run that by you. Like we would work out what any other potential partners would have access to together. And polyfidelity can be like, I have two relationships but they’re closed relationships on both ends. And well, it’s not like I’d actively be seeking out someone else to involve in my life, this is just an option in case I meet someone who I develop feelings for. I have no desire to have an open relationships or even sexual or dating relationships with other people just because. I would only want that if I even met anyone that I just had that deep of a connection with.” He explained.

“So like with Taylor…if she was okay with this…what would you prefer or?”

“I would kind of leave that up to her. I think she might have preferred a hierarchal thing though. Where if we were together first then that relationship is the priority and together we could set the boundary for what our relationship would look like. So say she was only fine with us dating and sleeping together when I was in California, then that’s what we would have. I think that a polyfidelity thing would be what I’d prefer in that case. I mean, I know that you guys wouldn’t be sleeping with other people, just me. And I wouldn’t say either one was more important than the other, we wouldn’t even have to do things together, each relationship would be what it is.” He said and you hummed as you gave it some thought.

“Wouldn’t that be…exhausting?” You asked and he chuckled.

“I don’t know…maybe.” He said pensively, “But like…to me, the way Taylor loved me didn’t feel the same as the way you love me, and vise versa. And then the way I loved you both also came out differently. I didn’t feel more for you than her, but it was just different. Does that… make sense to you?” He asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, that’s extremely logical.” You said and he chuckled.

“Are you just saying that?” He questioned skeptically.

“No!” You giggled, “I’m serious. I mean, there’s this quote from Ted Lasso that I really love and that I live by now. The quote is: “All people are different people.” And I mean, it’s so obvious and simple, but it’s something that we forget far too easily. So when you say that the way you felt love from and for us was different, it makes sense. Each person loves differently and has different needs. Our energies are different, you know? Of course it feels different with another person. Each relationship is going to be as unique as the people in it.”

“Right, it’s not like a competition between who I love more.” He said and you nodded.

“Right.” You confirmed and he smiled and then frowned. “What it is?”

“I don’t think I had the proper words to explain this to Taylor when I first told her about you. Maybe if I had more knowledge or simply just accepted and understood this part of myself before I could’ve hurt her less. Like, I’ve apologized and explained and we’ve forgiven each other for any hurt we caused each other, but I just…feel bad for how I affected her.”

“Yeah, of course. That’s understandable. I’m glad you guys got to talk that out eventually though. Is she better now? When was the last time you saw her?”

“Ummm, early June?” He hummed, “She looked so much lighter than when we were together. She was back to her old self and it was hard to see how badly what we had was affecting her.” He explained, “That’s really what pushed me into the depression phase. Just seeing how much better off she was without me. It just…fed my fear that I only hurt the people I love.” He said and you hummed. 

“Do you think that if you’d known this about yourself with certainty before that she would’ve been alright with it?”

“Absolutely not.” He chuckled, “Her concern was that I’d start to love you more than her and like fall out of love with her and just leave her for you.”

“Mmm, well at the risk of sounding like a total dick…isn’t that just what happens when a relationship starts to…fall apart? You start to fall out of love with someone for whatever reason? Like that’s just what can happen to anyone. It’s part of the general risk of being in a relationship, no?” You asked and he chuckled.

“That’s basically what I said to her one time. I just said it less delicately, but it really offended her. But it’s the truth, feelings can change at any time for any number of reasons. And I mean, I did love her, I think I still do a little bit, obviously.” He said and you nodded, “But I’m starting to move past it. See with you I…thought I was moving past it.” He said, “Thought that this whole time. The sex therapist? She was basically saying that in me moving on so quickly, I was just…distracting myself from having to properly move on from you basically. And like…seeing each other again after so long, I mean…it just brought everything up for me again and it almost felt like we had broken up a week before. I missed you terribly and I was constantly thinking about you and Sebastian and I just…I had to say something to Taylor about it.”

“Yeah, that makes sense.” You said and he sighed.

“I guess, I’m still figuring things out in terms of this polyamory thing. But again, I just want to reassure you that I’m not actively seeking another partner, nor am I interested in dating or sleeping with other people at this time. If it happens, it happens, but obviously if it takes away from what we have going together then our relationship would take priority over that. I do believe that we connect in a very special and extraordinary way. I love and miss what we had before, but after seeing you again last year and with the time we’ve spent together already I absolutely cannot wait to see how good we can be together this time around.” He said and you smiled and just got up and climbed into his lap and hugged him tight.

“I love you.” You hummed and he sighed in relief.

“I love you too.” He answered as he hugged your waist tight for a few moments until you pulled back from him to be able to look into his eyes.

“So where do we go from here? What are you comfortable with?” You asked him.

“Well, we don’t have to rush into a relationship. I mean, I know we love each other, but I want to date you. I want to reacquaint myself with you and fall in love with the you, you are now all over again.” He said and you smiled a bit, “I also want to make sure that I’m not using us a distraction to finish moving on from Taylor.” He said and you nodded.

“Yeah, of course.” You agreed, “I mean, if you still have feelings for her do you think that maybe you might want to keep that door open?” You asked him and he shook his head.

“Yeah, she’s not on board with the polyamory thing at all. It just wouldn’t work for her.”

“Right…right.” You said and he nodded.

“Ummm baby, I have to ask because I can’t stop thinking about it.” He sighed and you nodded, “Wh-what’s the situation with Ricky?” He asked, evidently he was a bit nervous about asking you, you could see it in his eyes.

“It’s still just a friends with benefits thing. We don’t really hook up on the regular, like it’s not a planned, routine thing we do. It’s more opportunistic.” You explained.

“So the other day was like a fluke, basically?”

“For sure. I would never normally do something like that, especially while we’re in a professional setting.” You explained, “But I was just a little more…needy than usual.” You chuckled.

“Mmm, I see. I only ask because if I’m gonna stay here for a bit, like I just don’t want to make you guys feel weird if he’s like constantly around or staying over too.” He explained. “Like we kept making awkward eye contact yesterday at the pool party thing and like…yeah. I’m not…like it’s not a jealousy thing. I’m not jealous of him.” He said quickly.

“Just fuming inside a little?” You teased, repeating his words from the other day at the studio.

“Yeah, just a bit.” He chuckled, “Still.” He confessed.

“Don’t. To answer your question more seriously, Ricky doesn’t stay overnight here. Ever. And I don’t stay overnight at his either. We literally do the most to not blur any lines even more than they already are.” You explained.

“So you just…fuck and go?” He asked.

“It’s not that transactional.” You chuckled. “It’s usually after we’ve gone out with friends or just hung out together. And if we both want to hook up we do and then we go our separate ways.” You explained. “We really don’t do sleepovers or even like lovey-dovey things like cuddles or holding hands. It’s just the sexual favors bit. Like we might lay around for a bit, but we just talk, we don’t like…hold each other and…bask in the afterglow.” You said with a giggle and he nodded.

“And it doesn’t feel….empty? Without the soft bits?” He asked you more seriously.

“Of course it does.” You smiled a bit sadly, “I think it does for the both of us. He’s hung up on someone else and well…same.” You said and he smiled and nodded, “So we just hook up when we’re both feeling in the mood for it. So we really are friends first and the benefits are there when needed.” You explained and he nodded in understanding.

“So if it’s one of those times when you guys talk afterwards, like is it feedback about the sex or just random conversation?” He asked.

“Just conversations. Like sometimes we talk about the people we miss and things about them. We talk about how we’re feeling afterwards, like sometimes when that post-coital haze is lifted you just get so sad, you know? So we talk about that and try and figure out why we might feel sad. We talk about what the point of all of it is…I think we’ve achieved a rather deep level of friendship from this.” You said pensively.

“And you don’t like him even just a little bit?” He asked you.

“I mean, of course I do. I hook up with him, don’t I?” You chuckled and he did as well, “But it’s very surface level. We did talk about that one time, about what would happen if we ended up together. We both decided it would be a no-go.” You chuckled, “He’s just so…unworried and unbothered by everything. Doesn’t really plan or anything and well, you know how that drives me crazy. Especially with the job we have.” You said and he chuckled and nodded. “I’m definitely more balanced with my time now than I was before but it’s because I’ve been able to schedule and plan and whatnot. Like he’s kind of the type to get bored on a Tuesday and drive down to TJ with a friend or his sister because they want tacos from Taconazo. Like, I don’t have the same freedom to just do things on a whim without it throwing a bunch of things out of whack for myself.”

“Right.” He hummed, “So you…like him? Like you’re into him?” He asked and you looked at him quite perplexed, “Like in the way you like me?” He clarified.

“Are you asking if I like him more than you? Or are you asking if I…like him and you? Simultaneously.” You asked and he nodded. “I mean, I do like you both, but not in the same way as you do. Like, I definitely like you more, I mean, I love you, you know? I wouldn’t be able to love you and him. I would have to choose.” You said and he smiled.

“And you’d choose me.” He said quite confidently and you rolled your lips into each other to prevent your lips from widening in a grin as you shrugged. “Baby.” He pressed more seriously and you giggled.

“I mean…”

“Say it then.” He smiled smugly.

“Why? If you already know?” You asked.

“Because. I want to hear you say it for me.” He insisted. “Tell me you’d choose me. Every single time.” He hummed with a smile and you grabbed his face tenderly and leaned in until your lips were pressed together. 

Harry hummed in satisfaction as his hands slid down your waist and to your hips. His thumbs gently kneaded at the pudgy part of your hips. You giggled when it tickled you a bit and he chuckled before sucking on your bottom lip a bit. Your eyes fluttered open and met his lustful gaze. You could feel him hardening up beneath you as he leaned back in for a hungry kiss. Your lips moved sloppily, it was all tongue and heavy breathing as your slid down and held at the side of his neck. His hands were groping at your butt now, smoothing his big warm palms over them, helping you grind over him and feel his obvious need for you. You pulled back and pecked his lips a few times before taking a proper breath.

“I choose you, baby.” You confirmed quietly between the two of you. He looked into your eyes, his lust was evident.

“It would be wise to stop, wouldn’t it?” He asked and you giggled and nodded before kissing him a few more times and hugging him tight. After a few moments you pulled back and smiled at him and he bit his lip and reached around the back of your neck and pulled you down and kissed you deeply once more.

…. A FEW WEEKS LATER ….

It was your birthday and you were having fun so far at the little dinner party you had thrown yourself at your place. You felt pretty in the short black linen dress you’d chosen for yourself. You were nursing a cocktail as you chatted with those who had already arrived, you were waiting for a few more people, including Harry. You had hired on a private chef to take care of dinner tonight so that you could enjoy with everyone, after all, you only turn thirty once.

“So when did Harry move out of here?”

“A few weeks ago? He only stayed about a week. He was able to find himself a decent sized house really quickly. It was furnished, so it was rather convenient, it’s cute.” You smiled as you shared this with Melissa who nodded.

“That’s great!”

“Yeah.” You smiled in agreement.

“Sooo…any progress?” she asked with an expecting look.

“We’re not talking about that.” You said to her and she sighed in some disappointment.

“Fine.” She said with a smile. You appreciated that she didn’t push any further.

In truth, you and Harry had been mostly seeing each other at the studio after he left your house. You had both been scared into keeping things extremely platonic after that dinner he had prepared for you when you guys talked about your future. You had said you were going to take it slow and ended up half naked on your bed just about to initiate sex when you asked him to stop in a panic. The entire week he stayed with you the sexual tension was completely overboard, but you both knew it was for the best to not get involved with each other like that yet. So it was quite a big relief to you both when he left and you only saw each other at the studio. This would be his first time back at your place after he left so you were a little bit nervous in all honestly, which is why you had refused taking a shot three times already, you needed to be fully sober in order to not act impulsively.

“Harry!” You heard Caitlyn greet him excitedly from inside. You straightened up a bit and sucked a bit more of your drink though the straw. “Harry’s here!” Caitlyn announced as she led him out and everyone greeted him happily as he approached you and you smiled and stood to hug him.

“Happy birthday.” He hummed as he squeezed you tightly, “Welcome to thirty.” He said as he pulled back and you smiled.

“Thank you.” You chuckled.

“You look beautiful.” He said more quietly, his compliment slightly drowned out by everyone’s chatter.

“Oh, thank you.” You said as you glanced down at your dress quickly and then back into his eyes. He licked over his lips as he scanned over your face and then smiled bashfully when he realized he’d been caught.

“Sorry.” He hummed and you smiled.

“It’s alright. Ummm, have a seat.” You said gesturing to the table and well, the only spots available were at the further end of the table.

“You can sit here, Harry. I actually need to talk to Ben.” Melissa said as she stood up and headed further down the table.

“May I?” Harry asked and you nodded.

“Of course.” You agreed and he sat there. It’d been two or three days since you’d spoken, you were busy finalizing everything with the party and Harry had therapy and some catching up to do with other friends he had in the area.

“So, how’s it been planning all this?”

“A little stressful, but I think it ended up well.” You smiled and he nodded.

“Yeah, it looks really nice. S’a simple, little thing. I like that.” He said and you nodded.

“Yeah, thank you.”

“I ummm, I got you something that I want to show you later, I-if I can hang out a little after everyone goes.”

“Oh okay.” You nodded and he smiled. Your curiosity was piqued and all throughout the evening you kept thinking back on this and wondering what it could be. 

You were having a nice time with everyone, you guys were playing games and sharing stories. You had a delicious, fresh peach pie instead of a cake and everyone seemed so delighted with that choice. The chef really knocked it out of the park with that one. Afterwards, there was a bit of karaoke but when it hit 10:30 you guys started to wind down as to not disturb your neighbors. Slowly, your friends started to head out one by one, congratulating you once more on your birthday and you were thanking them for coming as you walked them out to their cars. Harry, Caitlyn, Ricky, and Melissa had stayed inside talking a bit more but you suspected that they were also getting ready to go, well except Harry. You guys hung around a bit more, the glances between you and Harry were nothing short of obvious and frequent, so being the one person to read the room, Ricky suddenly stood up.

“Well, it’s almost 11:30, we should go.” He said as he stretched his arms above his head a bit and once they got his hint, Caitlyn and Melissa stood as well. You and Harry followed them to the door and you all said your goodbyes. “Don’t be scared of falling.” Ricky mumbled quietly against the side of your head and you squeezed him tighter.

“Thank you for everything. Love you, I appreciate you.” You mumbled.

“Me too.” He chuckled before you kissed cheeks and he was hurrying after Melissa and Caitlyn down the little path. 

You and Harry followed after them and waved them off before you locked the gate as Harry made his way back to the house. You felt nervous around him for some reason, like his energy was too great to allow you to breathe, or maybe that was the alcohol…you’d had three cocktails which was already a bit much for you by this point and you were convinced your friends made your last one a double without your permission. Regardless, you were smiling at him while he watched you come up.

“What’s wrong?” He asked and you shook your head.

“You’re making me nervous.” You chuckled.

“What? Why?”

“This mystery gift thing!” You scoffed as you guys made it inside and he locked up behind you.

“Yeah alright, fair.” He smiled as you headed to the kitchen.

“Want some water?” You asked as you headed into the kitchen.

“Please. Benny made the last drinks a double and that awful taste is not leaving my mouth.” He confessed with a slight grimace.

“I knew it!” You gasped and he chuckled, “They were trying to get me to do shots before you arrived.” You said and he chuckled.

“Well good thing you declined. You really don’t want a hangover at thirty.” He laughed and you did as well and soon you were both having a bit of water and then he sighed.

“Okay, well it’s two things.” He said and you nodded, “First gift is this…” he said pulling his phone out and after several moments of waiting, he looked back to you, “You should check your email. The personal one.” He said and you nibbled on you lip and went to grab your phone that was on the other side of the kitchen counter. You open up your email account and saw the link to a ticket and when you opened it up your free hand flew over your mouth and your eyes welled up.

“No…but th-these sold out in like five minutes!” You gasped in surprise at the Joni Mitchell ticket waiting to be accepted by you.

“I’m her friend.” He said simply and you shook your head in disbelief. 

She was playing two dates at the Hollywood Bowl and despite your best efforts during the sale in February, they sold out in moments. It was a bittersweet thing, seeing artists that were such icons and legends performing what would surely be some of their last shows ever. Being able to make it to things like this made for priceless memories and well, you grew up with Joni Mitchell, like Harry did, and you both loved her. It was one of the things that you both had in common and made friends over when you first started talking, so she meant a lot to the both you. “We’ve got a private box. We’re right up near the front so we can see it all!” He said excitedly, “And we get to meet her beforehand, if you want.” He said and you set your phone down and shook your head in disbelief.

“This is extraordinarily thoughtful, H.” You said with a wide smile.

“Our first concert out in the open. No fear, no worries, just us.” He said and you hurried over to him and hugged him tight.

“This is honestly so amazing.” You sighed as you squeezed him tight and he kissed the top of your head. “I can’t wait to do this with you.” You said happily.

“Me either. It’s going to be so good.” He said with certainty and you nodded against his chest before pulling back and peering up at him.

“Can I kiss you?” You asked him and he chuckled.

“Always.” He hummed and you laughed and tip-toed a bit more and your lips met in a sweet and chaste kiss.

“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” You gave him another kiss with each ‘thank you’ and he was a smiley and blushing mess before you. “My parents are going to die when they hear about this.”

“Well, part two…they’re coming as well.” He said and you pulled away.

“No.”

“Yeah!” He laughed happily and you shook your head.

“Harry.”

“I swear it. Your mum and dad, and my mum and her boyfriend. A proper date night. Though the meeting bit is just for us two.” He added and you were crying now, it seemed something ridiculous, but it was a full circle moment.

“This is so nice of you.” You whispered as you hugged him again.

“Hey, look at me, my love.” He hummed and you glanced up at him, “It’s not just a concert, you know? I want to do this with you and with our parents t-to also show them that it’s not just a for fun thing. This is about the future. Our future.” He said and you nodded. 

“Thank you.” You whispered, “I’m gonna kiss you for real now.” You said and he chuckled.

“Yeah, do it. Please.” He insisted and you chuckled.

Your lips were soon colliding gently and moving in an improvised but effortless dance together. You relaxed in his arms, you loved the warmth of his hands around your waist and then traveling down to your hips as he held you tight. It was a feat as challenging as the greek mythological quests trying to keep your composure around him. Everything just felt so easy and right when you were together, it always had. But now it was even stronger than before, you could feel the love emanating from him as you held each other and kissed passionately.

“Baby,” he mumbled, “can I…say something?” He asked and you nodded and pulled back from the kiss but he chased after you and kissed you deeply again before also keep the distance so he could speak properly. “I know we said no more jumping into things with people but you’re not just anyone, you know?” He said and you smiled a bit, “The love I have for you has been here the whole time. I’m not burying the hurt by wanting to be with you, it’s not like that with you, you know that.” He said and you nodded, “I want to be with you. I want to a relationship with you. I don’t want to wait anymore, I’ve already wasted so much time.” He said and you caressed his cheek with your thumb, “And I…I see the woman you’ve become. How you’ve grown and blossomed so beautifully-”

“You too!” You sniffled and he smiled.

“Thank you.” He chuckled, “But ummm…I don’t want to miss out on this. On you. It’s different with you, you know that.” He said, “Let’s do this again. Be my girlfriend, please?” He asked and you laughed happily and kissed him.

“Yeah. I will.” You whispered against his lips.

“You will what?” He asked with a grin and kissed you a few times, awaiting your response.

“I’ll be your girlfriend.” You said breathlessly with a smile. 

Harry was beaming and his hand came around the back of your neck, holding you gently as he dipped down and you kissed once again. He was slower this time, but the intensity was still at all time high. You felt your lust for him simmering steadily, nearly ready to bubble over into a boil with whatever move he’d make next. Your skin was tingling, excited to feel his touch once again.

“Can I take you to your room?” He asked, his lips gently smearing against your cheek as he spoke and then kissed you there.

“Yes.” You confirmed and he found your hand and led you through your house until you were bursting through the door and he was kissing you ardently as you walked backwards into the dim, cool room. His hands slid down your waist and landed over your backside, he caressed over it and gave your cheeks a light squeeze.

“I miss being able to do that.” He chuckled and you laughed a bit. You weren’t as thin as the people he had dated lately, so there was a little more to grab onto. You didn’t mind it, you were happy with yourself and you knew you were healthy, so you didn’t feel bad or find a need to even compare and it was relieving to you that he felt the same. “You’re exquisite. You know that right?” He asked and you smiled timidly at his compliment.

“How about you show me show exquisite you are first.” You suggested and he chuckled and was quick to take a step back and pull off his shirt, not even bothering with the buttons. 

Like a moth to a flame, you were right up against him again, kissing down his neck lightly. Trying not to smile too much as you traveled down to his pecs and the smattering of hair between them tickled your nose a little as you smooshed a kiss over his sternum. Your hands slid up his abs, you could feel his tummy flex a bit from the tickles your light touches were causing. You continued sliding it up until your index finger was hooking into the chain of his trusty pendant with the Jesus and penis charms. You tugged it down a bit before arching up into him and kissing him again. His hands slid up your back, his fingers feeling around for the pull on the zipper for your dress. 

“It’s on the right side.” You guided him and he was quick to take his hands there and slid it down. 

Harry helped the straps off of your shoulders, planting kisses on each shoulder blade before letting the dress drop down to the floor. You weren’t wearing a bra with it as the neckline was a bit strange, but he didn’t seem to mind that one bit. He groaned at the sight of your breasts bare before him and he immediately brought his hands up to them and kneaded them gently in his big, warm palms. You sighed in relief and glanced up at him and he seemed to have snapped. He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you towards your bed. He sat and pulled you onto his lap in a straddling position and kissed you urgently. His tongue met yours sloppily before he started to kiss down your jaw, then your neck and finally he reached your chest. You arched your back in as he gently sucked on your collar bone and then skimmed his lips down to your right breast before parting them and latching around your nipple, effectively hardening it in a second. You moaned in relief as his blunt nails dug into your back as he started sucking more fervently.

“Yes! That’s so good.” You whimpered as he moaned around you. You peered down, looking at his gorgeously hollowed our cheeks as he sucked and nibbled at your tender little bud before popping off and moving to the other one. He payed it just as much attention, letting you whimper and whine as he went a little harder on you. Your fingers scratched against his scalp and you chuckled as he pulled back, nipple still in his mouth until it inevitably slipped out with a soft popping sound. He buried himself in the crook of your neck and inhaled and then exhaled, sounding relieved.

“I missed the scent of you and your perfume. I’d forgotten how good it is.” He said softly.

“I do too. Even had the same body wash you use for a while.” You said and he pulled away and smiled up at you.

“Yeah, baby?” You nodded.

“I’m never gonna forget again.” He told you with certainty and you smiled and caressed his cheek with the back of your hand. He leaned into your touch and let his eyes close for a moment.

“I’ve imagined this moment so many times.” You whispered and his eyes fluttered open and met yours. He smiled softly, peering up at you with so much love it made your insides flutter. 

“I have too.” He whispered back and kissed your lips quickly. “Hold on tight.” He said and you did and he stood and then had you on the bed as he laid over you.

He started to kiss down your body, you were already so wet for him, but knowing what was coming next practically had your legs trembling preemptively and your walls fluttering in excitement. He didn’t waste time or tease you at all, he needed this as badly as you needed it. He was quick to pull your underwear down your legs and toss it aside as he slid further down, parting your legs so that he could fit between them. He kissed down your mound and up your thighs before he nuzzled right up against your center, his stubble tickling your sensitive skin. You would normally want to be clean shaven if you knew someone was going down on you, just out of convenience, but you knew he didn’t care about that. He groaned happily at your scent and the softness of you against his lips as he puckered them up a bit and kissed at you a little bit, each time nuzzling a bit deeper until he brushed against your clit and you bit your lip in anticipation. 

“Fuck H, please. Please.” You begged and he let go of all the restraint he had inside of him and just let his tongue roll out as he spread your legs further so that he could lap up from your dripping entrance to your clit. He flicked over it a little bit before giving it heavier licks until you were pushing him closer and moaning in pleasure. Your hips were writhing up against his mouth and he moved with you, loving how you were losing yourself in this moment. He then started to gently suck around you as he sensed your growing need. You were soaking wet, making a right mess of his chin and you were obsessed with how he was using his mouth. He’s always been eager to please this was excellent. Clearly, he was well aware of what he could do now and it was amazing, “Fuck baby, that’s so good!” You gasped as he slurped on you until your legs were tensing up as your pleasure started to escalate further and further until they started to tremble. He was incessant, your chest almost burned from how shallow you were breathing, and in seconds you were inhaling sharply and moaning melodiously as your orgasm hit you. “Oh, I’m coming!” You mewled and held him against you as he licked you through it, mumbling about how good you tasted and how much he missed it. He didn’t even warn you when you felt his index finger rubbing at your sopping entrance.

“Can I?”

“Yeah, do it. Please.” You hummed and he gently pushed it inside. He moaned along with you, you were wet enough for another, so he pulled it out and then sunk back in along with his middle finger. His long fingers reached deep into you and rubbed against your walls, going deeper and deeper with each plunge until he had gone deep enough to reach into the soft spongy spot inside of you that had you crying out his name. He kissed up your stomach, waist, chest, and neck all to reach your lips again and breathe in your exhales of pleasure.

“Fuck baby, you’re so tight and warm f’me.” He hummed into your mouth and you nodded, “So good for me.” He muttered and you smiled against his lips. 

Your hands slid down his bare torso and reached down to feel his erection straining against his pants. You rubbed into it, using the heel of your palm to add a bit more pressure. His jaw tensed as he inhaled shakily through his nostrils. You started to rub at him in a matching pace to his fingers sinking into you. You wanted to feel him inside of you desperately. 

“Harry. Baby, I need you.” You whimpered and he nodded and kissed you hard before retreating from you. 

He got off of the bed and reached for his belt buckle, his desperation and eagerness coming through in the form of his shaky hands. He soon got it undone and pulled it out before getting to the button and zipper on them and he tugged them down along with his underwear. He stepped out of them and quickly climbed back over your naked body. Feeling your warmth together like this was something that he’d been thinking of constantly since he’d seen you the year before. He was eager to be close to you in this way and finally, he had it.

“I have condoms in the bathroom, but I also have an IUD.” You informed him and he licked over his lips as his eyes met yours.

“D-do you mind if I go bare? Want to feel you so bad, want to fill you up, want you to feel it all.” He said and you kissed him as you shook your head.

“I don’t mind.” You assured him.

“Sure?”

“Yeah.” You nodded and he kissed you once more, slower this time.

“I’ve only been waiting to have you again for…years?” He chuckled and you did too, “This might be over a little fast. But I assure you, I have far more in me. A couple rounds worth so-”

“It’s fine. Did you not see how fast I came?” You giggled.

“True.” He chuckled and tucked your hair behind your ear, “God, you’re so beautiful.” He complimented. His voice was soft and genuine and the love in his eyes made you feel faint. You leaned up and kissed him.

“I love you.” 

“I love you.” He whispered against your lips. Your kiss deepened and naturally, things started to progress. You pressed your body up into his, feeling his erection laying heavy between the two of you. You raised your hips up to feel it brushing up against your sticky folds and he sighed in relief at the slick warmth that his cock was up against now. “Fuck, put me inside, baby.” He said to you and you angled your up hips up a little bit more and guided him to your entranced. His thick tip prodded at your weepy, little hole, teasing at the entrance. You writhed around, trying to get him inside and he smiled, “That feels so nice.” He said and you smiled, “So wet for me, baby. All for me, isn’t it?”

“Yes, baby. S’all for you.” You confirmed through a needy exhale and he kissed you again and then propelled his weight further forward until there was enough pressure against you that he sunk inside and you gasped in relief as he moaned into your mouth. 

“Fuuuuck.” he moaned as he bottomed out and you whimpered as you felt so full. You swore he was in your lower tummy, he was bigger than you remembered. You recalled that he loved a little bite of pain, so when he wriggled a bit and sunk in a bit further you winced and dug your fingernails into his back. He made the most delicious sound, it made you feral and he started to thrust in slowly but achingly deep, it was making your thoughts completely blank. “You feel so good, baby. Fuck, you’re so good, my love.” He panted in pleasure.

You were covered in goosebumps, relishing in the feeling of intimacy with Harry. With the love of you life. Everything suddenly felt right with the world. Your back was arching because each and every time he was thrusting in, he was hitting a spot that made you feel like you would soon levitate. Your hands roamed the skin of his back, feeling his muscles working to bring you both all the pleasure in the world. It was the most harmonious sex of your life, you were both yearning to be closer than you already were. It was absolutely necessary to get closer. 

While still inside, he pinned your hips down with his and knelt up making you gasp in shock as he got even deeper like this. You suddenly felt strung out as he started to pick up his pace, his hips undulated and ground against yours in the most satisfying ways. You were encouraging him, praising him for how well he was fucking you. He was giving everything to you, you could feel it in his movements and in the rising temperature between the two of you. Damp skin and filthy wet sounds from the place where your bodies were connecting perfectly. You could feel your orgasm starting to build again so you slipped your hand between your bodies and started to rub precise circles into your clit and he moaned.

“Oh, that’s it, baby. Rub your little clit for me, want you come for me.” He encouraged you and you sped up a little more, “Look at me. Please, look at me.” He panted and your eyes slowly blinked open and met his. He smiled softly and pressed his forehead to yours, his gaze burning into you, making you feel like the only other person in the world. “Fuck, it feels so good with you. You feel so good.” He groaned and you whimpered as you started to reach the peak.

“I’m so close, baby!” You warned and he nodded.

“Come for me, love. Let me feel you coming so hard on my cock.” He egged you on and you suddenly felt warm all over as you started to come undone. Everything inside of you was singing beautifully. You felt like you were burning bright, like a dying star, you were crashing and burning, it was a spectacle to behold. “That’s it, baby. That’s so fucking good, fuck you feel so good, love.” He praised you with a smile, “S’gonna make me come…fuck, you’re gonna make me come.” He grunted.

“Yes, baby. Please come inside me. Please give it to me.” You begged as your orgasm continued thanks to his fast and desperate thrusting into you. His eyes blinked shut and his eyebrows furrowed down as his lips fell open and he let out a low moan, “Oh fuck. Fuck, m’gonna fill up your little pussy. Fuck! Oh fuck, Y/n…fuck yeah, baby.” He sighed and then buried himself as deep as he could go and you gasped as you felt his cock twitching inside of you as he painted your insides with his generous load of cum. He was still for a few seconds before grabbing your hair and tugging you up so that he could kiss you. Your lips met sloppily as he started to thrust gently into you. Your abs were burning and your legs were shaking as he continued fucking into you slow, milking every drop of his sperm into you. “I love you. Loveyousomuch.” He slurred against your mouth.

After a few moments you had both settled down, trying your best to catch your breaths as you basked in the warmth, holding each other close. Your fingers scratched at his scalp gently, it felt so nice and relaxing. His lips were kissing at the part of your skin that they could reach while he held you close.

“I’m never letting you go again.” He whispered.

“Good.” You hummed and he smiled.

“This is where I belong. I feel safe with you. I feel seen. I feel…”

“Whole?” You whispered and he nodded.

“Yeah, you make me feel satisfied with myself.” He said and you smiled.

“You make me feel whole too. I love you.”

“I love you.” He hummed, “Forever.” He added with a smile.

.... THE END ....

< Previous Part <

----TAGLIST----

@sunshinemoonsposts @anotherdudetteinthisworld @matildasatellite @sad-avocado @sunflovverharry @cherrysulewski @daphnesutton @gurugirl @reveriehs @ottawaoutlander @jessitpwk @permanentllyharry@here4thefanfics @slutfortigertattoo @angelbabyyy99 @freedomfireflies @behindmygreyeyes @justlemmeadoreyou @thedevilnamedlola @vonnexann @nikkisimps @fairytale07 @polari28

[kkongdakz]

“ I MISSED YOU. ” ft. shen ricky

ricky x gn!reader, genre : pure fluff, warning : a very cheesy and clingy boyfriend, wc : 834

three days. three days had passed since you last saw ricky. summer holidays had just begun but he already seemed to miss you, if you judge by the number of messages you had received since this morning.

📩 ricky : are you home today?

📩 ricky : are you busy?

📩 ricky : do you have any plans?

📩 ricky : is your family here?

📩 ricky : do you feel lonely?

📩 ricky : can i come?

📩 ricky : hello? y/n?

you ended up calling him after you were fully prepared — and it took no less than half an hour for him to show up in front of your house. opening the door when you saw him, your boyfriend literally threw himself on you, wrapping his warm arms around your body. « i missed you. » he said, as you let a scoff slip from your lips, slipping your arms around his waist after pushing the door closed, « this is what i thought i noticed. »

moving slightly away from you, ricky placed a soft kiss on your cheek while slipping his hand into yours. you guided him through the empty house, to the kitchen, where you hastened to serve you both a nice cool soda on this hot day. but ricky didn't seem to mind giving you a break, and climbed behind you to hug you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder. « and me? didn't you miss me? » he asked, placing an innocent kiss on your jaw. finishing serving the drinks, you turned around to face him, giving him a nice smile, « i didn't have time to ask myself about it, you were already back with me. »

a pout appeared on his lips, which you hastened to kiss chastely. it was quite unusual to see ricky so clingy and desperate for your presence, but this situation made your heart beat a little faster, so you didn't mind. taking the glasses in your hands, you went into the living room with him, the boy walking behind you like a lost puppy. his hand clinging to your shirt as if he was afraid you would disappear, made him look awfully cute. as he dropped into the couch, he pulled you with him, practically dropping you into his lap, which made you cry out in surprise.

ricky's arms slipped around you, holding you close to him as his eyes watched your face in the most tender and loving way. moving one of his hands, he brushes your cheek with his fingertips, caressing your skin as if it were made of porcelain, « you're so pretty. » a shy smile crept across your lips as you leaned in to place a kiss on the tip of his nose, « i feel like you can't live without me anymore. »

ricky nodded positively, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear — you were right, one minute without you was like hell for him. but obviously he won't admit it out loud. pressing gently on the back of your neck, he placed his lips here and there on your face, coming close to the corner of your lips. « do you think your parents would be willing to let me spend the whole vacation with you? » looking at him with a raised eyebrow, you struggled to contain a small mocking laugh. your hands slid down his face, pressing his cheeks to make a pout appear on his lips, « even though they love you, i don't think my dad would agree. »

letting a small sigh leave his throat, ricky grabbed your hips to tip you both onto the couch, the latter now on top of you. your hands now clinging to his neck, your thumbs gently caressing his skin, « and as much as i would love to have you with me every day, don't you think you'd get tired of me eventually? »

ricky seemed so offended by your remark that he shook his head negatively, bringing his face close to yours to nibble your cheek. « you're saying nonsense. i will never get tired of you, love. » — to say that your heart didn't explode at the sound of that pet name would have been a lie, then pressing on his neck delicately, you let your lips appropriate his, the time of some loving kisses. his delicate fingers caressed your skin in the most tender way possible, you felt truly loved. even if it was quite rare to see ricky so soft and clingy towards you, you were going to enjoy it as much as possible. which led to a long session of passionate and loving kisses, your hands making a mess of his hair, and his hands going here and there under your shirt.

it was a hot afternoon you wouldn't have wanted to stop for anything in the world, or at least — until your parents came home from work.

·˚ ༘ taglist (fill out this form to be added to the taglist) : @invuwrld @deafeningtyrantmilkshake @snowflakemoon3 @watamotee33 @annoyingbitch83 @kpoprhia @ilovechanhee @shiningstar-byulxx @wtfhyuck @zuzu-the-simp

[goingsunnythousandmerry]

Satoru Gojo X Suguru Geto - Fluff/Yearning/Angst/Pain

Authors Note: Hey friends! I know I am still behind on requests. It is next on my list. I apologize, school has taken more time than I planned. Anyways, I've gotten really into Jujutsu Kaisen lately so I wrote this for my best friend yesterday when Mr. Loverman was stuck in my head. She thought I should share it.

Hope you all enjoy and I'm sorry it HURTS.

Warnings: Umm if you don't want to be sad don't read.

Lots of YEARNING.

These characters are not mine they belong to the great Gege Akutami.

The above image isn't mine, credit to who it belongs to will give it if I am told.

Summary: Memory reflection of the friendship of Gojo and Geto and the words left unsaid.

Song listened to while writing:

Mr. Loverman by Ricky Montgomery featuring Chloe Moriondo

Hope you all Enjoy! Thanks for Reading!

***

How can two people know what love is if they’ve never seen it themselves?

The small classroom was empty except for two occupied wooden desks. Two men sat across from each other, separated by a few desks. The smell of freshly erased chalk lingered throughout the room.

Gojo looked at Geto and the clouds seemed to stop moving in the sky behind him. Geto spoke about his passions like the world at his feet could never crumble. The faint echo of the wind outside was erased by the warmth of Geto’s smile. Whenever Geto spoke, Gojo’s eyes shone like sunbeams piercing through deep water—soft, scattered, and alive with that lingering glimmer just before you break the surface. Geto’s morals and ideals were always  grounded in the possibility of others around them, but never their possibilities. 

The room suddenly felt too wide, like there was too much space between them, too much distance. Gojo stood, stretching, the movement drawing a faint breath from him as his eyes flicked back to Geto, who hadn’t stopped speaking.

Geto’s bangs hung loosely over his forehead, brushing the lids of his purple eyes. Gojo always hated his speeches, but he still listened. They were the strongest, that was all that ever mattered to Gojo, but Geto saw more. He saw more in Gojo than just what he was capable of, he saw who he was. Geto laughed as Gojo began slowly strolling across the room toward him, making some remarks about his moral compass. Geto’s eyes followed him, every step from Gojo drawing his focus tighter. Geto wasn’t sure what he was saying, he was too distracted by Gojo’s confident stride. His breath quickened, the muscles in his leg trembled, and his mind raced as Gojo approached.

Gojo’s gaze was steady as he crossed the room, his feet sure but slow. Gojo stopped in front of Geto with a sigh and the offering of a sarcastic comment. He watched Geto chuckle softly, shrugging his muscular shoulders in response. His laugh like the steady drum of a heartbeat, warm, constant, and grounding. With a quiet exhale, Gojo placed a hand on Geto’s shoulder, his gaze drifting toward the window behind them. 

“Satoru.” Geto whispered.

Geto’s voice lingered on his name, like a breath shared only between them, warm and familiar in the quiet space. His voice always made Gojo's mind reel. Those two syllables explained why Gojo constantly acted out. He wanted Geto to say his name and never stop. But within the silence between the lingering of his name and the moments when Gojo spoke Geto's, there were words left unspoken—feelings too uncertain to be named.

***

Gojo stood and stared at the puddle at his feet. In the water’s reflection were the colors of his memories with Geto– the bike rides, the curse hunting, the pranks– the echo of it all blending into a beautiful canvas. But at the heart of it all, always, was that day in the classroom—frozen in his mind, looping endlessly in the silence of his solitude.

A drop of water broke from the overhang above and splashed into the puddle, sending ripples across the reflection. His smile faltered as the moment cracked, the ache in his chest deepening with the memory of being too late to save him. He was always too late. 

“I wish I had told you.” His voice raw and quiet, a whisper to no one blending with the sound of the rain that began falling again. “I miss you now that you’re gone, Suguru.”

“Gojo-Sensei!” Yuji called his name and Gojo shook the thoughts from his mind.

[woneuntonzz]

what's it like to love ? 𓇢𓆸

anton lee x afab!reader (part 1/5)

• part 2

• part 3

• part 4

• part 5

warnings: cussing!

genre: fluff -`♡´- highschool love

word count: 4.5k words!!

౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ description: student athlete!anton x studious class officer!reader | you swore to yourself, to you friends and even to your parents “I'm not one to easily fall.” and you thought you were that tough, not until him of course.

[note!!: hiii i'd just like to quickly say that this is my first ever post ever and i'm still a bit insecure with my writing, and english is not my first language so bare with me now 🙏 open for any forms of feedback

please do take note that i will take longer to update/respond to anything because of school, thank you!!! ]

Anton's that one guy in your class that's very soft spoken —literally. But he wasn't the total loser type, in fact, the other guys in your class are very drawn to him. You figured, maybe it's because he's a student athlete and guys think he's cool for being so good at what he does, or maybe he does have a very likable personality, but you wouldn't know. You weren't curious enough to get to know him then.

The only conversations and interactions the two of you have had are for academic purposes. He was your groumate for a group report once, you took the liberty of being the group leader that time. He was responsive and he did his parts for the report, the only thing he never did was give feedback or be more open to share his opinions. You thought it was a bit odd, since at that time you have been classmates since freshman year.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“Hey Y/n, Anton requested to not talk for the report. He said he might not be loud enough.” one of your classmates who was also your groupmate for the report told you just about an hour before reporting.

“Oh, okay, that's fine.” was all you could utter as you glanced over at Anton's seat.

You could've sworn you saw him looking at you before you had set your eyes on him, but you just shrugged it off and got ready for the report.

You, your other groupmate, and Anton were all standing in front of class. Your voice dominated the room and it seemed that all of your classmates were listening or were at least being respectful, everything seemed to be going as planned. And you were relieved that your report was successful and your group was given a decent grade for your report and its contents.

It's the end of the day and you are getting ready to go home. You were gathering your things and tidying up when you saw some of the guys in your class gathered in a clump at the back.

“Y/n carried.” you heard one of the guys say making you playfully roll your eyes with your back facing them. You knew they were teasing Anton.

“Anton did good too.” This time, your other groupmate for the report spoke.

“Yeah, he's pretty good at staring at Y/n—” 

“I did my part, shut up.”

You stood next to your desk, back still facing the boys. Your eyes were wide open. You didn't know where to react at first, what one of the guys just said about staring at you or the fact that Anton's voice was loud enough to make you take a thick breath of the almost-empty classroom air. 

It got quiet for a short while that felt like an hour to you, and they were probably minding your presence, so like a reflex, your feet sped out to your locker. Your mind was suddenly flooded with questions. You felt conflicted to say the least, you didn't even know if you just misheard everything. You started loading your locker with the stuff you had intended to put away when you received a tap on your shoulder. 

You turned your head and felt your face warm up a bit. 

“H-hi Y/n.” 

“Anton.” Anton gulped at the sound of his name being emitted by your voice.

“Umm, I- well. Uh…” he cleared his throat, his eyes shifting around, never meeting yours, not even by chance. You widen your eyes from anticipation, encouraging him to carry on, not that it mattered since he wouldn't even look at your face. “I'mreallysorryforwhatmyfriendsaidokaythanks.”

And like a flash, he was already on his way out of the school building. You found yourself sighing at the situation. But since then, you've never been able to look at Anton without thinking about that very moment.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

It's been months since then. You've been wanting to try and get to at least be on casual convos during class breaks terms with him, but you can't pin-point whether it's you who can't keep up with him, or if it's just him avoiding you entirely.

You tried to catch his attention once by glancing at him nonstop all day during class and breaks, but to your dismay, he was stiff as a statue. You knew that he was aware, it was all too obvious. He wasn't as active as he normally was, he would just stay in his seat and would sometimes rest his head on his desk, using his right arm to hide his face from your sight with his forearm resting at the top of his head. He would only get up from his chair to go to the restroom or to eat lunch at the cafeteria, and when he does get up, he's always facing away from you. 

You left empty-handed at the end of the day, you even missed a day's worth of notes that you deemed necessary. 

“Why did I do that? now I have to revisit textbooks for notes.” your best friend chuckled from the other side of the line while you propped your head on your hand.

“You know it's bad when he's got the Y/n missing her notes and not listening to class.” you gave your best friend a blank stare as he cackled on.

“What do I do Sohee?” you blinked a couple of times before he was able to respond.

“I don't really know. I can't really imagine myself in your shoes right now.” your shoulders drooped down at his wry tone. “What? you were the one who helped me get with Xen.”

“Dude Xen is literally my best friend too. I know her well enough to give you some tips and I've known you since we were kids so helping the two of you out was nothing really.” Sohee gave you a flat smile, shrugging his shoulders.

“Anton is my friend too, we're definitely not as close as you and me but maybe I can tell you some things…” his voice faded into the air towards the end of his sentence and you weren't sure if you caught on everything he just said.

“What is it?” your tone made you sound eager and desperate making Sohee grin. “Stop. Just talk and wipe that smug look off of your stupid face.”

Sohee coughed slightly, clearing his throat. He took a small breath before speaking. “From the stories you've told me about the quote interactions you've had with him, he's being weird a-f.”

You furrowed your brows, leaning a bit more into your phone's screen with so much anticipation.

“Well… not to make you overthink, but, he has something going on.” Sohee gave you the same innocent, flat smile as if he didn't trigger an alarm in your brain.

“What? I don't get it, what does it have to do with me?” you urged to which Sohee kept the same expression just staring at you through his phone screen. “What the fuck Sohee.”

“Girl, calm down.” you rolled your eyes, your back falling onto the backrest of your desk chair as you bored holes into Sohee's soul. “The 'something' is about you.” 

Your face went blank again. Your eyes settled on the floor to your left, lost in thought.

“Girl, are you there?” Sohee was waving his hand in front of his phone until you finally looked back at him.

“Is it a bad kind of 'something'? I could've sworn I've done a decent job staying nice to everyone even though Jihoon and his friend lowkey pissed me off for being such pains in the ass in our group thesis.” Sohee started cackling again.

“I don't know man. I think this is for the two of you to figure out yourselves.” you were about to speak when he slightly jumped from his seat. “Okay Xen is calling me, love you bestie, bye!”

Soon, you were left staring at the void that is the black screen of your phone. 

You found it hard to sleep and for a good hour, you were just staring at the ceiling, trying your best to put yourself to sleep, but whenever you closed your eyes, memories of him avoiding you kept replaying in your head.

————— ୨୧ —————

You were dead-set on letting your thoughts rest, determined to ease your mind and figure out what could've possibly caused Anton to ignore your existence. Does he hate you? Is he scared of you? Or is he somehow feeling some other way about you and now he's just trying to run away from it? —even thinking about the latter makes you mentally slap yourself in the face, but who can blame you? The past few months have been confusing and it's been bothering you a lot like an itch in your brain.

Despite the lack of sleep, you were devoted to being an early bird and went to school at your usual time. You got straight into catching up with yesterday's notes. Your desk had a small stack of textbooks and your pens and highlighters scattered, not too far from each other. 

You tried to concentrate but found yourself glancing at Anton's seat frequently, and having to erase, rewrite and white-out the things you were trying to jot down. 

Soon, your eyes were shut, and so were your consciousness. 

You were awakened by a hand placed atop of your head. You were expecting it to be one of your friends, or maybe it was Anton. You hated yourself for even thinking that. You felt the drool down the side of your chin. You frantically wipe it with your hand, your face still hiding from the scene that was awaiting you.

Finally lifting your head up, you see everyone darting their eyes at you. It was such an overwhelming feeling. You look up, feeling the presence standing next to you. It was your English teacher who had placed her hand on your head to gently wake you up. She smiled at you, worry still apparent in her eyes. She glanced over at your notebook that was left with tiny scribbles and unfinished notes, your scattered pens and whatnots, and the forgiving pile of textbooks resting just above your notebook. 

“We're about to start class, but I'll let you continue with that Miss Y/n.” The soothing voice of your teacher allowed you to calm down as she made her way back to the front to greet everyone again.

Everyone, including you, stood up to greet her back. Your 3 hours of sleep caught up to you quicker than you thought. You felt fatigued and it frustrated you. You have gone hours without sleep but had never felt this weak before. As everyone sat down, you felt a pair of eyes on you. You felt stupid for turning your head so quickly to whoever's eyes it was, because it was him. Your eyes met, suddenly your tired eyes softened. It took a good minute before you two eventually broke eye contact. 

Your face felt hot and you found yourself eyes wide open, listening to your teacher discuss the lesson of the day, actively taking notes like you always did. It was all for the means of trying to push away the feeling and image in your head that kept replaying the way he blinked slowly as he looked into your eyes and looked down before turning his head away from you.

What you weren't able to catch was how he scanned through your features, that even with a slightly swollen face as a result of your prolonged nap, you still looked surreal. 

He tried to push his worry at the back of his mind. When he walked in the classroom earlier that day, you were already passed out on your desk. Usually you'd be talking with your friends from the other class just outside the classroom before class starts or you would be sitting on your seat and cramming schoolwork or studying for a test. He grew more and more concerned as the ringing of the school bell inched closer and closer and you were still fast asleep. Your head shifted a bit causing one of your pens to roll off of your desk. Anton was quick to pick it up, quietly placing it on your desk. Everyone else in the classroom seemed to not be minding the both of you, the final exams were approaching, everyone was busy finishing what they had to. Anton found his hand hovering over your hair. He wanted to wake you up, in fact, he needed to. But the bell caught up to him, and the next thing you know, your English teacher was the one who woke you with what he had envisioned. 

Throughout the day, you just sat nicely on your seat, finishing the notes you missed the previous day during breaks and attentively listening to your teachers and taking notes during class.

During lunch time, you still had your eyes glued to your math textbook while writing down notes in your notebook. The classroom started to empty itself, the students heading to the cafeteria to get themselves full.

“Y/n, are you almost done? Have lunch first. You've been there since you got here.” you look up to see Xen and Sohee, hands linked, both giving you a warm smile.

“Go ahead. I'll follow, just have to try and understand this equation.” Xen pats your head lightly with a soft chuckle.

“Okay, we'll wait for you.” Xen says softly before leaving the room with Sohee.

The sound of the soles of your shoes continuously hitting the tiles beneath your feet filled the room as your right leg began shaking out of frustration and the struggle of not being able to comprehend the math problem you were met with. You were never good at math, at least when you entered highschool. You could've sworn you were that math genius in class who always had an answer for everything back in your elementary and middle school days, and yet, here you are now with your eyebrows nearly touching and your lips forming a slight pout because of math. You didn't know what it was, but your eyes landed on Anton's seat drawn to it like a bee to a field of flowers. Maybe it was because you were getting impatient with yourself not being able to figure out this one math problem, but you were not expecting Anton to be sitting there in his seat, facing you. 

He looked away, you could kind of see his body growing tense as he breathed in, eyes shifting around on the floor. 

“Why are you still here?” you ask nonchalantly. 

It took a while to get any kind of response from him, so you just went back to staring at the other problem you were dealing with. 

“I-I can help you with —with that… if you want….” your eyes grew larger after hearing his soft voice above you.

He stood next to you, eyeing what you have been struggling on for quite a while now. 

“I just don't understand.” you blurt out. 

Anton flinched a bit at the clear frustration reflected in your tone. He grabbed a chair nearby and hesitantly sat next to you, keeping a great distance. It wasn't long until he was able to take a grasp of the problem, what took long was for him to muster up the courage to speak up.

When he was finally over his contemplation, you beat him to it. But as soon as the air from your voice hit the corners of his ear, his eyes landed at the back of his hands that were peacefully settled on his lap. What you blurted out next was not in his list of expectations. “Do you hate me?” 

He was stuck frozen in his seat. He was bummed. He knew he messed it up. He wanted to ask why you would even think that, but he was aware of his actions for the past few months, he just didn't realize how badly it affected you. He thought you never cared, but he never knew you were just that good at hiding it. He felt bad, but also didn't want to assume your thoughts or feelings. Sure, he had memorized the features of your face and how your eyes would glisten against the harsh sunlight seeping through the classroom windows, how your brows would furrow every time you heard or witnessed something cringey, how your lips would subconsciously form a pout whenever you were concentrated on something, and your voice, he loved it the most. The first time he heard a melody slip out of your tongue he thought an angel was coming to retrieve him, and your laughter, he can't help but smile so fondly whenever he replayed it in his head. He admired your confidence and ability to connect with others despite stating in your first day introduction that you were the epitome of introverted. But it was all surface level stuff for him, he still didn't quite understand you fully, and he wanted to. He was undeniably love-struck.

Realizing how quiet it had been for a lengthy couple of minutes, you sighed. “I'm sorry for being so sudden with this —It's just, did I do something wrong? Am I just assuming that you've been avoiding me? or were you really avoiding me? Why so?”

Anton watched as you let your frustrations fire out like you were being chased, breathy tone and all. He hated himself for being oblivious of the fact that he had you feeling this uneasy.

“I like you.” he never thought he'd be able to utter these very words to you ever. 

It was dead silent. You turned your head to the side, looking for his eyes and you felt delighted to meet them again. You scanned his features, was he always this beautiful? —you ask yourself. You noticed the shift of color in his cheeks making you chuckle. Anton's eyes widened, his shoulders lifting itself slightly.

“You're not just saying that, right? you mean it?” your mellow and warm tone taunted his ears and he couldn't help but look away and smile.

“I mean it.” he urged softly. 

The two of you mindlessly wandered in each other's eyes, and soon, the gap between the two of you came to a close. His lips felt so warm and velvety. You felt a sweep of hot air hit your lips. Anton pulled away leaving a small distance between the two of you, looking down on your lips, gradually making his way to your eyes that had just fluttered open when his lips parted from yours.

“Y/n? your food's getting co—” Xen's calling ended with a gasp as she stood by the door being met with the sight of Anton just inches away from eating your face.

“What's going… on.” At this point, Anton was facing away from the door, looking down the floor once again with his hand behind his neck while you were left just sitting there with your eyes almost popping out of your head just staring at the couple standing by the door of your classroom eyeing the two of you.

“Um—uh, sorry. I'm just gonna fix my stuff.” The absence of clarity in your tone was evident and you can hear the soft giggles from Xen and Sohee along with some exchanged whispers.

“We're gonna head back. We'll be expecting you there, yeah?” Sohee glanced over at Anton who was now standing up. “You too Ant.”

Xen and Sohee flee from the scene while you struggled with putting away your stuff with your shaky hands, your notebook ended up slipping from your hand which Anton attempted to catch, but failed in the process. A small laugh escaped your mouth, you found this little action of his adorable. He couldn't help but smile sheepishly, mumbling a little apology for his poor attempt of saving your notebook from hitting the ground. 

When the two of you got to the cafeteria, you only had 15 minutes left to finish your food. You sat down next to Xen who was exchanging looks with Sohee.

“Ant, dude sit here, would you?” Anton stopped in his tracks on the way to get food when Sohee held him by his forearm.

Anton's eyes subconsciously found their way into yours again, quickly breaking it after the scene from earlier flashed before his eyes. “Yeah sure.” he murmured quietly, nodding and speeding to go get food to hide his flushed face.

You felt some heat climb up your cheeks. You could still feel the warmth of his lips against yours like a phantom. 

The outcome of the confrontation was not what you expected at all. You wanted to approach things with a go-with-the-flow mindset even with how troubled you were with everything going on. You expected him to just be sorry and shy away from you, but the sudden confession drowned your head with thoughts. Do you like him too? The feeling that guided you to that very situation was the feeling of guilt, confusion and slight despise, but now, you just didn't even know how to function properly without thinking about him. It was all so sudden, but you were thankful that this 'something' he had involving you was not driven by negative feelings.

When Anton sat across from you, you looked up at him. You saw his adam's apple bob up and back down. When you heard Xen clear her throat that's when you realized that you've been staring at Anton for the past five minutes, at his lips to be more specific.

Anton flicked his tongue over his top lip, needless to say, he is far from recovering from what had just occurred in your classroom earlier. He could feel your eyes on him, and deep down he was wondering, does she like me too?

Later that day, you took the liberty of asking Anton for his number, his Line i.d., Kakao, anything. 

Anton stood with his back facing his locker and you in front of him. Despite the ridiculous height difference and the fact that you've been looking up at him the entire time, he treated the situation as if you were some jock and he was this sweet and nerdy girl.

“I brought you here to ask for your contacts, and maybe, we can talk about today —well, about everything.” Anton was a bit shocked since he was the one who confessed, he was the one with the overbearing feelings, yet you still had to be the one to break the walls to reach him.

“Yeah, jus' —here.” He hurriedly gave you his phone.

His ears had been red the entire time, but then his face turned red too seeing your soft eyes look up at him without moving your head. You laughed which made him smile but at the same time, confused. 

“You have face ID on your phone?” you asked casually.

Anton hastily nods his head right after he finally realizes it. You held his phone up to his face, and it opened, but then he snatched his phone away from you the moment the screen lit up.

“Sorry, I just… uh —here.” he hands you back the phone, now with his line account open. 

You quickly sent him a friend request that you accepted as soon as you saw it pop up on his phone. Then you exit the line app. 

Silence…

Anton was staring at you, wide-eyed, and you were staring at his phone, also wide-eyed. His homescreen wallpaper is a photo of you, a photo you did not know the existence of. You went on to check for his phone number like your hand wasn't getting shaky at that point. You give him back his phone once you're done with everything.

“Thank you, Anton.” Anton could've been easily mistaken for a fire hydrant because of how red he became, and hearing you say his name so softly, hearing you talk to him, finally, it felt like he was going to implode right then and there.

You turned around to make your way to the exit, you went two steps forward before you were stopped by Anton's unassuming voice. “I'm sorry about earlier. I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry.”

You wanted to turn around and tell him that he has plenty to be sorry for, but given his seemingly true intentions, maybe, just maybe, he would make it up to you without you uttering a single word about it.

“Hey, it's fine. Well, not really —or, yeah. Let's just talk about this later.” you faced him as you spoke, ending your sentence with a weary wave.

He watched you walk out the school building, hands gripping on your backpack's straps. 

The moment Anton got home, he immediately took a shower, changing into comfier clothing. He already had his phone in his hand with his line messages open. He stared at your contact and thought of how he should open a conversation with you. He sat at the edge of his bed, typing and deleting messages over and over again.

You were lying on your bed already during all of this. You watched his typing status appear and disappear, and then reappear again.

Anton shifted around on his bed and eventually found himself lying on his stomach, his feet touching and raised up in the air refusing contact with his bed.

You bit your bottom lip, holding back a smile even if it made no sense for you to do so since you were all alone in your room and you doubt that Anton could see you through his phone screen.

Though Anton appeared to be shameless with his messages, the heat and color of his face says otherwise. 

Anton watched your typing status appear, and it remained there. He didn't know if it was because of the rapid beating of his heart but you've been typing for a long time, which you were.

You were carefully thinking of what to say next. But then you thought for a moment, shouldn't he be the one to keep talking? He had a lot to explain after all.

At this point you were flushed as well. You found his endearing quirks in chat to be cute and humorous.

Maybe this is why his friends are so fond of him —you thought as you glanced over your exchanged messages with a smile.

Anton now laid flat on his back. He quickly turned off his phone, his cheeks remaining the same hue as it was when you two started messaging. He smiled at the thought of you two finally having an actual conversation. Though he never thought it would be about his unforeseen confession, he still felt so lucky, so warm inside that he could finally push forward with his feelings. Anxiousness would soon follow moments after he had closed his eyes. He was sadly still far from feeling redemption. He started nit-picking his own thoughts of the many ways he can make it up to you, and maybe he gets to call you his by the end of it. 

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

[sirenc0re]

hello, sirenc0re! i come here to ask if you have any RTC character headcanons that you wouldn't mind divulging?

ohhh i have a few! these are somewhat disorganized, i dont think ive really shared these outside of a single reddit comment. anyways:

penny loves boybands ofc (backstreet boys, nsync, obviously 'seven up' before it split) but further than that i think she likes 60s-70s pop too- fleetwood mac, kate bush, the beatles, etc

ezra is the one that's genuinely really into gangsta rap. NWA, tupac, snoop, dr dre... and of course eminem (though he isnt really a gangsta rapper. it's adjacent) i think rap in general is something he likes. though he's like, a smartass. so i think that at least early on he would "like" it the same way he likes penny's boybands (something to mock as the pinnacle of empty and vapid commercialism) before he actually starts appreciating it as art (JK-47 notwithstanding) and not something he has to prove against. so im saying he would genuinely like tribe called quest. it's in my mind. i am manifesting it. as a side note, i jokingly wanted to be like AND HE LISTENS TO MACKLEMOREEEE but im a hard ass and in the timeline that exists in my head it's 2009. and in 2009 mackle had the penis song as the first track of his debut album. make of that what you will

ocean's whole straight-lace schtick is her twisted version of a teenage rebellion against her hippy parents. she also makes herself seem better off than she actually is. im of the firm belief that pretty much everyone in uranium (except perhaps constance's parents and misha's adoptives) is broke. and i think that with her parents lifestyle, ocean would be on the lower end of that spectrum and it's a big insecurity of hers that she tries very hard to project against to varying degrees of success

noel says he was saving up to go to france, but if you looked at his bank account there would be maybe 200~ saved there. most of his wages went to supporting himself and his single mother

post-cyclone au, i think ocean would shift away from politics and become a personal injury attorney

post-cyclone au, ricky becomes a sci-fi erotica author… i like to think he's extremely successful in that particular niche

post-cyclone au, ocean and noel's relationship becomes wayyy less hostile. they still 'fight' but all the venom has been sucked out of their words. one time he tripped her in the hallway inbetween class periods, which prompted her to halfheartedly kick his ankles, which leads to a 'fight' that gets her in trouble in school for the first time in an actual decade (she's pissed)

post-cyclone au, constance's epiphany about life being beautiful makes her a lot more bold. which is to say she now has the confidence to go on a million little sidequests for no other reason than to experience the bounties of existence. penny wants to go to a concert 3 hours away but she's still banned from the bus? constance knows how to drive and the unlimited trust of her parents, hop in

very much inspired by ray winter's take on misha when he was answering asks about it so i've absorbed it because it makes sense: misha was a class clown back home and pretty well-liked. he's such a solid and passionate dude, and way more kind than he's allowed to be because everything in canada seems to hate him. i believe that his 'attitude' problem mostly stems from loneliness, (which is kinda exerted on him but also enforced by him after a certain point since i think he retracts himself into his phone with talia rather than be in the real world where he is miserable) and that he would have done so much better if he had one genuine friend he could talk to. in a post-cyclone au, he gets a bunch of those, and no longer feels like all of those emotions are being stiffled or bottled up

those are all the HCs that are relevant i think ^_^

[jujitto]

𝖠 𝖫𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝖢𝗈𝗆𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗍 | 🎧 . !! 𝖲𝗁𝖾̂𝗇 𝖰𝗎𝖺́𝗇𝗋𝗎𝗂̀

—★! 𝗐𝖼 ! 𝟣.𝟢𝗄

—★! 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀 ! 𝗇𝗈𝗇𝖾!

—★! 𝗌𝗒𝗇𝗈𝗉𝗌𝗂𝗌 ! 𝗒/𝗇 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗍𝗂𝗋𝖾𝖽. 𝗌𝖼𝗁𝗈𝗈𝗅 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝖻𝖾𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈𝗈 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝗋. 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝖽𝗈 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝗋𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝖾𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝖻𝖺𝗋𝖾𝗅𝗒 𝖽𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍. 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝖺 𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗍. 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗏𝗂𝖽𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝗋.

—★! 𝖺𝗇 ! 𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝟦 @hannahhbahng! 𝗂 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗂𝗍! 💕☺️

Y/N didn't feel like trying anymore. She was tired and just wanted to sleep...no cry. Yeah, that's all she wanted to do. Crying is all she felt like doing. Pushing the door open to the empty space, she was met with silence. Y/N sighed, tossing her bag down by the door, as she shuffled her way through the apartment.

Ricky wasn't home, but he usually was. He would always meet her at the door with a kiss and smile. It had become their routine over the last few months of their living together. But this was the first time she was greeted with nothing but silence. No smiling boyfriend to ask about her day. Especially when she needed him the most. Y/N sighed, going to rummage through her bag for her textbooks.

As a way to distract herself. And yet she struggled to stay focused. The words on the page began to blur and become a jumble of nonsense. Her mind and heart were tired of learning. She just wanted to do something other than University work.

‘Where is he?’ She wondered as she pushed the textbooks away from her. Y/N’s head came to lay against the cool surface of the table. Her fingers traced little shapes into its surface. A long sigh left her lips. The apartment was quiet, the only sound being her breathing. The silence was too much for her to bear so she pulled out her phone to text him.

She quickly typed out a message, sighing as she read it.

**Will you be home soon?**

The message seemed so innocent. And yet to her, she felt as though it came off as her being clingy. She hadn't meant for it to come out that way. She just wanted her boyfriend home. But it was too late to delete the already sent message. Seconds later, her phone buzzed with the sound of a message coming through.

She looked at the device, her eyes reading the message.

**Are you okay? Do you need me to come home?**

**Can you?** Y/N was quick to reply, a wave of embarrassment hitting her as reread the message. Gosh, she sounded so clingy. She hated it. She felt pathetic. Her phone vibrated in her hand.

**Be there soon.**

She had gotten what but why did she feel as if she shouldn't have texted him? Y/N shouldn't have to call him to soothe her tiredness and take her away from this irritating world. And that was her problem. She always needed him to soothe her frustration and needed him to hold her in his arms.

She just wanted him. Time seemed to go slow as she awaited his arrival. Y/N waited for minutes, which seemed to turn into hours for her. The silence was driving her crazy. Some part of her couldn't hold back the tears anymore. So she let them go. The tears streamed down her cheeks and onto the table.

Everything seemed to blur as she cried. So much so that she didn't hear the door opening or the sound of approaching footsteps until she was wrapped in a warm embrace.

Ricky gently shushed her, his thumb wiping away her tears. Y/N just cried in his arms, as she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. Tears had begun to soak his shirt as he held her.

Ricky just held her, that's what he normally did. It became their little thing. Whenever life or school got too hard, he was always the first person she would go to. He would hold her until she calmed down enough to talk or just be there for her.

He didn't know how she felt, and he probably never would but the fact that he comforted her and did his best to try to understand was enough for her. Her cries began to cease, and the tears had stopped streaming down her cheeks.

Y/N pulled back slightly from his embrace, her head resting on his chest. “Do you want to talk about it?” Ricky asked as his hand rubbed soothing circles on her back. Y/N sighed, shaking her head.

Ricky knew that would be her answer. She never wanted to talk about what was bothering her, it was something Ricky never understood. Silence settled over them, Ricky’s hand still rubbing circles on her back. “I-it’s all stressful.” She stuttered. Ricky didn't say anything as he listened.

He always listened whenever she decided to open up. Him just listening always seemed to bring her comfort. “University, work, everything is stressful. I-i just need a break from it all.” Her voice tried as she trailed off.

Y/N was tired. She didn't feel like talking, crying, or anything anymore. She just wanted to sleep and forget. Forget her stress, her troubles. Everything. Ricky hummed, his arms pulling her closer. Some part of him wasn't sure what to say.

But then again the other part of him did. “Maybe you should. I know it's probably not what you want to hear but maybe it's what you need to hear.” Ricky spoke. Y/N sighed, knowing what he was saying was true. For the last few months, she had been pushing herself non-stop.

She needed to stop and take some time for herself. She sighed nodding as she looked up at him. A yawn left her, exhaustion starting to kick in. “Let’s go get some rest.” Ricky said, as his hand took hers.

Y/N nodded, following him to their shared bedroom. She sighed happily as she cuddled into the warmth of his embrace. Her mind and body could finally relax. The weight on her chest and mind had disappeared. Sleepily she spoke as she drifted off, “Thank you.” Ricky smiled, pulling her closer as he set a reminder. ‘Give y/n the break she deserves.’ Placing his phone down, he wrapped his arm tighter around her.

He was going to give y/n the break she deserved. He promised her that.

[miumura]

hi i rlly enjoyed ur niki bf headcannon if ur open to requests pls do one for zerobaseone taerae if u have time :)

📸 — TAERAE AS YOUR BOYFRIEND !

hihi tysm <33 !! ofc , reqs are open !! and aaa im so glad you requested for taerae !! needed to write something for zb1 and my boyfie 🫶 hope you enjoy!

warnings : brief spoilers on camp zb1, mentions of petnames

— daily drives with him! doesn’t matter if it’s day or night, you two can spend hours driving together, playing songs you both love <;3 hes driving ofc HAVE U SEEN HIM IN CAMP ZB1?!?!?!

— would probably prefer being the driver since he wants to impress you, but he doesn’t mind if you do <3 !

— in this relationship, he’s def going to be the talker and you’re gonna be the listener. he just has sm to talk about so he needs someone who is willing to listen to him. and that will be you so prepare for lots of conversation!! flashbacks to taerae and ricky eating LMFAOOO

— honestly goes to you for support. when he’s down, he feels comfortable enough to share with you what he’s thinking. genuinely tries to listen to you and follow your advice.

— when you guys hang out, he would pull out his guitar. he’d play it and sing songs that are secretly dedicated to you! not anything special since he always sing w/ a big smile on his face <3 I NEED A TAERAE

— seems to be shy when getting compliments ESP FROM YOU. like he would giggle, kick his feet, turn red—just ANYTHING a lovesick person would do.

— our little taeraeista would definitely need some fashion advice. although he loves his red pants, he still needs to look good when he goes out! so he talks to you for advice. and well, if you’re both bad at fashion, at least you both can dress weirdly <3 could couple match with the red pants 😊😘

— you guys would do random things out of nowhere. you two could be eating and suddenly taerae is singing “call me mother” and acting like hanbin..and you’d join him and then laugh it off together 😭😭

— he’s gonna impersonate everyone INCLUDING you 😭 so do anything he thinks is funny, he’s impersonating you for a lifetime. good luck!!

— the type to just go up to you and bother you. like your space is his space too, don’t think you’re getting away if he’s there 🤨 you and him are one.

— he’s just a clueless bf at times 😭 i gen thinks he would zone out and be like “huh?” after you ask him something

— probably uses petnames like darling or love. like he’d be like “can you get me that darling/love?” like shut up n give me a kiss already like 😊

— he seems like such a patient bf 😭 like he would give you all his attention whenever you wanna say something. would probably give you a big smile as his rubs your hands bc he thinks you look so cute when thinking </3

— never a quiet place when taerae is there. when he’s in your presence, you better get a speaker and playlist ready bc you guys are ready to party!!!!! super loud n chaotic!!!!!

— teases you but gets flustered when you do the same back…like sir did you not just?$?!

— seems like the bf you can just always joke around with <3

💭 — head empty just taerae

ZB1 PERM TAGLIST — @dwcljh @ilovewonyo @jiawji @tzyuki @kpoprhia @flamiricky @rikizm