#he... he isnt real
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Thirty minutes into the auction, and he’s already tapping a vexed finger against the velvet armrest.
A vibration in the pocket of his dress slacks draws an irritated sigh. Without so much as glancing at the screen, he raises the phone to his ear. “Speak.”
“Sy?”
He pauses, a brow arching slightly at the familiar voice. “Miss Hunter,” he says, pleased, teasing. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
You don’t respond. He leans forward slightly, brows knitting together.
“Sweetheart?” he tries again.
“Can you pick me up?”
There’s no edge to your voice, no trace of the mischief that usually kicks off your calls. With him, you’re never the polished hunter they all know—always a little brash, a little demanding. But now, your words come quiet, empty.
He doesn’t miss a beat.
Rising to his feet, he shrugs on his coat. The wide-eyed stares of the auction organizers go unnoticed as he strides toward the exit, each step steady and deliberate.
“I’m on my way.”
other works
#WHY ISNT HE REAL#ori.writes#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus x mc#sylus#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace#sylus angst#sylus hurt/comfort#sylus comfort
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you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.
but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.
well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?
his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.
still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.
so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.
and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.
what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.
it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?
it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.
maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.
#spilled ink#warm up#oh im .... sick to my stomach.#i talked to him. like ....... we talked. that man interacted with my poetry and writing.#that article.... gutwrenching. i am so sorry to everyone he's ever even been in the room with.#i feel.... like... unbearably. sick.#he acted like he was cool and friends with me!! we were cool internet writers together!!!!!#i feel sick for even having been polite to him.#i ...... am experiencing something so fucking complicated.#i wonder how many of u are feeling that too. like ''oh i sent him an ask and he was funny and sweet''#THATS HOW THEY GET U. ..... and YES I KNOW!!!#i am so fucking well-read about parasocial relationships. it would just be nice to like. trust that someone ISNT#hiding a huge fucking background of BEING A COMPLETE MONSTER. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.#by the way i am not part of a fandom. this is “what the fuck i accidentally supported a rapist” not#“but my showww”. like i care far more about like. the human cost.#but also like... people are people. idk i saw a take on here about how nobody should mourn the books#and idk. people almost always reply to any scenario with their personal experience first -#''i knew him'' or ''wow i was just at that store'' or ''i grew up there'' or whatever. because that is how we establish connection &#emotional weight. that's just... a person thing. and there is a difference between 'oh this guy is a monster'' & the feeling of:#he's been a monster and i SUPPORTED THAT. i CELEBRATED him. i !!! a fucking victim myself!!!!!!!!! SUPPORTED . HIM.#i am sick. i feel so much pain for her and everyone he's ever hurt. saying ''the books are ruined'' is i think ... like how people say#they're shocked and disgusted by him. (obviously there's nuance here. im sure there's some creep doin it wrong. but u know. in general)#idk..... im an author. i understand my work is in your life in whatever small way. i understand that connection. it's real.
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listen there really was just something about how in the book, snow’s 3-page descent from hesitant lover boy to deluded mfer happens entirely in his mind. lucy gray gives him no indication whatsoever that she suspects him, that she’s going to leave or betray him. he’s just sitting quietly in the cabin waiting for her to return when that seed of calculated suspicion, which he has needed to survive the capitol, takes a hold of him and chokes the life out of any goodness left inside him. it really drives home your terror as a reader that “oh my god did he kill her? did she escape? what happened to her? why would he even think that?” in a way that when the movie had to adjust for visualization it lost some of that holy shit this guy has lost it emphasis.
#seeing some discourse and im not saying lucy grey didnt know#im saying she never dropped the kind of hints that she knew like she did in the movie#or if she did snow isnt worried about them until he very suddenly is consumed by them#snow is not concerned about whether or not she believed him. of course she did! hes snow!#but then shes gone…. for a while……#and its the sudden immediate drastic unravelling that comes across so clearly in the book#that i knew wouldn’t translate to screen yet still cant help but miss#the hunger games#coriolanus snow#tbosas#lucy gray baird#not a crime or anything just a note that i cannot stop thinking about#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#this is all from memory of reading it quite a while ago. so maybe 3 pages is an exaggeration#but i remember it happening VERY quickly and without much external cause#like we as the reader have no indication as to whether shes nearby or not.#snow has no idea either. he just SUSPECTS. and his suspicion breeds the hatred that has been bubbling inside him all this time#he hates how she undoes him. he hates that he WOULD run away with her if shed let him keep his secrets#and he HATES more than anything that she makes him WANT to tell his secrets#he wants to be vulnerable and reveal the ugly nasty parts about himself and still be loved#but he does not let himself and it is everyone’s downfall#he chooses cruelty bc it is easy and familiar and makes him feel more powerful than the vulnerable give and take that real love requires
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[Abandoned by the Lightners, his heart became cracked with hatred.]
Hitting a lil' too close to home?
#junie art post#ink sans#error sans#utmv#errorink#implied. but yea not the focus#this has been turning around in my mind for quite some time. im glad to finish it lmao idk if my ramblings make sense even.#so like listen. do you ever think about how similar the function of the utmv is to the dark worlds in deltarune.#in a meta narrative to fandom sense? idk the word#we are making exaggerated expanded worlds of the ordinary tools and entertainment of the real world and make it into something more#isnt that very very interesting?#and we explore every sort of possibility in that creation. both good and bad#and when all is said and done. every possibility found and the entertainment and secrets has all run out#we put it away. abandon and leave it behind#what is left? what happens to the world and characters we have created? can it sustain without us?#what of the ones left in the dark?#idk if yall saw me a few months ago but i reblogged comyet's old post of ink begging us not to leave him alone and to keep creating#yea that never left me#and seeing exactly THAT SCENARIO in deltarune made my brain iTCH#imagine an ink in King's position.... wait isnt that just underverse#mmmmmmm. darkner ink.....#also error is here too. not just for errorink or that i can't separate these two to save my life#but error is also one of the few people to be able to GET IT?? he can hear the creators too. ink cant#but hes pretty much programmed himself to avoid having a mental break down to this via reboot memory loss.#and ink has his own internal coping mechanism (hooray for short term memory loss)#these two idiots will do anything but confront truths lmfao#ahhh my favorite idiots. never change#mmmmm#deltarune
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really? right in front of my karaage?
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more windbreaker comics
#im ngl this scene cracked me TF up when i rewatched it#umemiyas talking to choji but right as he says this specific phrase he looks STRAIGHT AT SAKURA#almost as if he's flexing like “hey hey sakura. hey. did u know. id never lose. winks. isnt that hot of me. isnt that cool. are u smitten”#like dude you met this kid just YESTERDAY and youre immediately letting him decide the other teams punishment and giving special treatment#damn bro i know hes a cutie cat but CHILL OUt#(i say as if episode one sakura didnt have me on my fucking KNEES)#anyways thats enough out of me onto tags winks#umesaku#umsk#wind breaker#wbk#wind breaker comics#comics#thecmart#hajime umemiya#haruka sakura#ive had this in my wips for a while now but the latest wbk chapter spurred me to finally finish it.. umsk real guys... umsk real
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there's an art in the dark that took years to refine
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#itafushi#fushiita#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#if i had a nickel for every time i drew something in advance to post at a later date but couldnt take waiting and caved and posted early...#ill b so real idk how many nickels id have but its more than 1 ill tell u that much#im not cut out for holiday posting bc i always overestimate how long a piece will take and like 90% of the time i finish it early#that being said this ws GOING to b a valentines day piece but i accidentally leaned away from th roses and waltzes and in2 angst anyway soo#oops smile :'>#first itfs of the year starting it off strong but jfc i cant believe it took me a whole month before i drew my main ship#fake fan fr fr but! pulled out all the stops and youll never believe it a LOW camera angle!! no birdseye here worms eye only!!!#actually i changed my mind im shy no one look too closely @ th perspective i am scared of the csp perspective tool and refuse to use it#rawdogged those cathedral ceilings like god intended#anyway megumi rly rly wants to get his choreo down before the real deal isnt he so dedicated :)#fake idgafer i saw u longingly dancing with your boyfriend's shadow
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The current revisionism in Gravity Falls fandom by people who were literally elementary schoolers when the show was airing is so funny to me like. No, people weren't shipping BillDip over BillFord because everyone was morally derelict and just loved shipping a twelve year old with a triangle that much.
People weren't shipping BillFord BECAUSE FOR THE LONGEST TIME NO ONE KNEW FORD EVEN EXISTED!!!! 😭😭😭
#gravity falls#billdip#billford#bill cipher#dipper pines#stanford pines#people started shipping billford the moment he showed up and it became clear that they had some sort of relationship to one another#also genuinely idgaf if you ship billdip dipper isnt real bill isnt real if youre genuinely getting worked up over a ship you need to get#your priorities in order
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podcast people in my phone
#sherlock and co#s&co#sherlock holmes#john watson#mariana ametxazurra#been messin around with this piece for like over a week now. I think this is just mostly to have a general pointer of their design in my#''proper'' style. literally named this file cover.png in my folders lmao#I feel like it isnt as candycore as the chibi version. but its still at a level of colors Im happy with. thats good for me#love giving john watson the default medium-size v-neck when canonically he wears like exclusively merch tees#(maybe its under the v-neck lets all believe that)#anyways. things are moving! lotsa stuff I cant show anyone but my coconspirators... but Im sitting on. Some stuff#gettin there with work... settin up stuff... being insane in march.... da whole package#gonna be having. a real interesting week soon. we'll see what comes of it!#but for now. I sleep. have a good night lads! look both ways before crossing the street
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Trick or treat!!
Danny rolled his eyes, "Obviously, you're hallucinating."
"Huh?" Signal responded, sounding doubtful.
"I mean, you see a deaged Dick sitting at a table in one of Hoods lesser known safe houses eating cereal." He said, emphasizing his point by taking a bite of said cereal. "You can't possibly think this is real."
The daytime vigilante paused to consider this, something Danny is starting to think is a habit in all the bats, "You could be a clone."
"A...transparent clone?" He said, looking down at himself. He had tried to turn invisible like he did with the other bats but forgot that Signal had special eyes or something, and apparently, it didn't fully work on him.
"Look," Danny said, "If I was a clone, could I do this?" Danny then elongated his left arm and made it do spirals, "or this?" He began floating in the air, "Or-"
"Okay, I get it."
"Do you? If you're hallucinating this badly that you're convinced it's real then you should definitely see a doctor."
Signal didn't respond, simply looking pensive so Danny continued, "With your abilities you could really hurt someone if you hallucinate in the mask, ya know?"
Suddenly Danny was back in his seat, no crazy arms or floating, "Or at least go home and take a nap."
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-Later-
Hood: Why is Glowstick googling therapists?
Danny: My powers apparently don't work well on him, and I'm still not ready to meet my template yet.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#snippet#i think#danny is gaslighting all the bats one by one on accident#hes keeping his fingers crossed because Nightwing Rr and now signal have all spotted him and he made the same excuse each time#*im not real and you need intense psychiatric help* isnt the best way to intruduce yourself danny
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icarus
#‘dont forget what happened to icarus’. ough. ow. aough. Owwww OWWW#thry make me sooooo sadddd#Ughhh#the text says ‘whats done is done/you know this isnt real’#i was thinking of the tweet talking about the portal incident and how ford remembered it wrong#(where he holds fidds in his arms)#and the two interpretations of it being him viewing himself as a hero and/or as him trying to lessen his guilt#so this was made with all of that in mind#idk why i felt the need to explain that im normal. Promise. normal enjoyer of details#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddauthor#gravity falls#felix art
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saw a couple of ppl doing these posts, so i present to you my very first attempts at drawing seb vs now.......and just looking at the old ones causes me actual physical pain😭😭 bc why does he look like hes wearing a TOUPÉE???😭 we dont talk about it....just dont go too far back in my blog im begging you
#even drawings of him from like a few weeks ago or a few months ago i already hate LMAO its a quick turnover around here folks#i was looking at old wips yesterday and i was liek EW OH GOD thank god i never finished these bc i used to think these were good#and now im redrawing them#clora still looks great tho LMAOO its always just seb i look back on and go EWW WHO ARE YOUUUU🤢🤢🤢🤢#god i cant stop staring at how i drew his hair like girl.... wtf were u looking at as a reference when u put that MOP ON HIS HEAD!!!#old seb isnt real he cant hurt you😮💨#except for the psychic damage that he causes when i look at him#im not tagging this as choccyart#more like CHOCCYFART!!!!#gottem
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i honestly personally dont care too much about the whole "coparenting" debate but like i do feel like it sets apart people who DID watch the show and actually paid attention to what was on their screens and the people who didnt watch more than S7 or clearly just never retained any information the show gave us because...
Didnt Buck take care of Chris basically the entire time Eddie was in the hospital after the gunshot? am i hallucinating? like didnt we get this dad ass montage of Buck taking care of Christopher while Eddie was in the hospital? So wouldnt that mean that yes he has cooked for chris he has cleaned for chris he took christopher to school he would have to know christophers allergies because he was HIS CARETAKER!
but lets just ignore that part wasn't there a joke where they were at a call and the dad was like "you're always making me the bad cop!" and chim goes "can't you both be the good cop?" and both eddie and buck say "no." Clearly showing that buck isnt just a funtime uncle like yall are saying cus if he was wouldn't he not have to be the bad cop?
Also Eddie wrote him into his WILL! yall can say "oh you guys don't understand how this works and blah blah" all you want but the fact of the matter is he chose that man over his FAMILY... it's not like pepa and isabel were anything like his mother and father and yet he still left Chris to Buck. Buck lost that mans child in a natural disaster and he STILL left him in his care the next day. He even looks that man in the eyes and COMPARES Buck and christophers relationship to his and christophers. like guys please..
i think there is definitely something to be said about how sometimes Buck gets more praise for the things he does with Christopher or ppl almost pushing Eddie to the side of his own family but the way to combat that isnt acting like you can't see what is quite literally in ur face being shown on screen😭
#911 abc#911 fox#eddie diaz#buddie#evan buckley#911#like please that boy is his SON#and yall can try to pull the ppl forget eddie is his REAL dad' card all you want#like okay buck is the stepdad then?#buck isnt a stepdad.. he's the dad who stepped up#but no like do u guys think buck paralelling shannon is just for haha funtimes? NO!
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#he is being a good big brother#go lyney!!! gooo!!!!!!!!#★ my art#art#genshin impact#genshin art#freminet#lyney#lynette#fontaine siblings#<- i didnt know that was a tag.#i have a headcanon both lynette and freminet are taller than lyney#i donr CARE her model is shorter than his!!!!#if i dont see it it isnt real 🗣️#lynette is sitting thats why he looks taller dw i wonr ever do it again#he deserves to be called out for the shortstack he is
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A belief in Nominative Determinsim
#mira & isa sitting at the other side of the room: oh that cannot be a healthy rationalisation. someone should deconstruct that QUICKLY...#change's strongest soldiers VERSUS one guy echo chambering themselves about a susperstition-based retributive model of the world. GO!!!#isat spoilers#isat#isat fanart#isat siffrin#isat loop#sifloop#sloops#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#lucabyteart#hey look now. this is softer than usual isnt it? ignore the. ignore the subtle damnation of blame unto the self. its fine. theyre fine#this is in fact a slight adaptation of that headcanon of mine i linked! yep! turns out the way to comic-ise it was to. make it like#90% speech bubble and get kinda weird with the formatting. it's clunky and experimental but hey. im experimenting.#the next ones gonna have even more fucking speech bubbles if it goes how im planning. christ#then its gonna get followed up with something wordless so. all things in perfect balance.#DISCLAIMER: i like to write loop and siffrin displaying the maybe not so great logic-holes their seeming fear of 'retribution for not#sticking to (the script) what the universe intends for them' entails. i do not agree with their weird philosophising.#i in fact think this is . bad for them. and am exploring how fucking unhealthy their mindset seems to be even when 'mundane'#OCD siffrin real as hell whats with the doing arbitrary actions in specific ways lest Something Nebulously Bad Happen little dude?#anyway if you caught the extremely blunt symbolism of kissing a hand with a knife in it you win a prize! it's called self-satisfaction 🎉🎉#hmm. do people realise i kept calling this type of back and forth between siffrin and loop a socratic dialogue bc socrates was also just#arguing with himself? like he was just making up the other guys. complete thought experiment. i also call them that because theyre WORDY!!!
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things i will never forgive the duffers for: denying us the spectacle of robin absolutely READING billy's ass
#she would have clapped back so effortlessly#unpacked the internalized homophobia he wasnt even aware of#hes scared of her because she keeps (Correctly) psychoanalyzing him but he wont admit it#billy hargrove#robin buckley#harringrove#i really cannot draw robin for which i apologize#drawing real faces in my style or at all continues to be the bane of my existence#i just hope that it isnt too uncanny looking rip#sorry about billys dialogue too but like#i feel like he WOULD
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part 1 (on VA and being better than humans)
part 2 (on welt and being just a human)
#remember how in second eruption welt keeps getting covered in blood edgelord style whenever he fights??? yeah#wait first off#hi3#honkai impact 3rd#welt yang#void archives#voidwelt#my doodles#okay anyways. VA isnt human but they haven't been in a “human” body for very long so i reckon there's a lot of new experiences to make#and. i dont think he gets to be dignified enough NOT to be whiny about it. cmon. itd be so funny#second of all sure welt is human but that dude's real used to not giving a shit abt how he's doing and acting like a robot instead of a per#cuz he's got more “important” shit to do#(that's so fucking real of him man ME TOO BESTIE)#also as i told kai: that last panel is not a look of surprise or horror. i tagged this as voidwelt for a reason#i think we all know what kinda look this is#edit: and why tf would they be fighting sky people? why can they bleed? dont ask me im here to draw gay people covered in blood#edit 2: oh my god i didnt add the blood in the first panel. THATS WHAT THE JOKE REVOLVES AROUND???
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