#he's so stupid i wanna kiss him so bad
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my brother's best friend
pair. miya osamu x gn!reader
content: fluff, attempts at humour, miya atsumu is a little shit, first loves, mutual pining
synopsis. miya osamu takes pride in the fact that heâs the smarter of the twins. he, in fact, is not (especially when it comes to you).
wc. 3.1k
a/n: om nom nom nom nom brother's best friend trope nom nom nom... ok i have to come clean about this fic i literally wrote the first draft for this in 2021 on WATTPAD and it's been sitting dormant forever up until recently. enjoy đ«¶
âoh my god, how did i end up here?
itâs the only thought repeating over and over again in osamuâs head as he sits there staring at you. youâre too preoccupied with the menu in your hands to notice his unwavering gaze, scanning through it and muttering to yourself indecisively about what to order.
of course, the question of how he ended up here on a date with you could be summarized in one simple sentence:
miya atsumu is the worldâs biggest idiot.
if kita or aran were here they would surely be poking fun at him right now, lecturing him about how his dna is a perfect carbon copy of atsumuâs. and while they would be right, osamu is convinced his brother has at least 70% less brain cell capacity.
the thought makes him feel a little smug. (heâs in the class under atsumu.)
you were friends. at least as far as how often you saw each other, he considered you good friends. maybe. not that he knew all that much about you other than the fact that you were constantly... around. if he didnât know that atsumu was the biggest knucklehead on planet earth, he would have assumed you were dating. but he knew his brother was too invested in volleyball to be seeing anyone seriously, and you didnât didnât seem like the type to mess around with guys like him anyways.
you were way too level-headed for that despite the raunchy, head-turning jokes you liked to tell, which honestly might be the reason why atsumu keeps you around.
whenever you came to their house, you would stick to lounging in atsumuâs room or the living room. you typically avoided disturbing osamu and the rest of their family â not like they minded having you around. no, in fact, their mother had a strange soft spot for you. you were quiet and well mannered, until it was just the three of you and suddenly an onslaught of fierce attacks on poor atsumu would commence.
for the majority of your friendship, you have stayed out of his way and he stays out of yours. you only talk to each other when deemed necessary, like when walking home from school or when you shyly greet him at the door because atsumu is on the toilet. he does, however, rejoice in the fact that there is another person on the atsumu hate train, and appreciates that youâre at least colourful with your insults. itâs impressive, really.
(he would never admit it. never. never ever. but it warms his heart a little that thereâs someone out there just like him, expressing their love for miya atsumu in less conventional ways.)
you were quick witted and funny. a free source of entertainment when he would grow bored of his brotherâs shenanigans. and it was a two way street, because when you needed a break from atsumu, osamu was always right there.Â
you were noticeably gentler with the younger of the miya twins: asking him how school was, and if he needed help with his chemistry homework, and what he had for lunch. menial little things, but sometimes he found himself thinking that it was the highlight of his day.
otherwise, your presence in his life is, as osamu considers it, indifferent.
sure, he likes to look at you. and sometimes, maybe, he wishes you and atsumu would invite him around more often. it also doesnât help his heart when youâre so nice to him, like when youâre all having dinner together and you pretend you donât want the last dumpling on your plate and shovel it onto his. he likes that. or when you invite yourself into their freezer for ice cream, you always make sure to grab an extra one for him. there have been multiple occasions in which youâve wordlessly slid him your notes to copy, too.
you were good at that; knowing what others wanted and being more selfless than the average person. youâre a people pleaser, and though he and atsumu used to make fun of your type when they were kids, your charm is undeniable.
unfortunately, actually making any sort of move on you is out of the question. not only would it potentially complicate things between you and him, it would also risk putting a strain on your friendship with atsumu. making his brotherâs life a living hell is what miya osamu was born into this world to do, but for some reason his stomach turns at the thought of ruining your friendship.
you were just atsumuâs cute best friend. nothing less, nothing more. and he would very much like to beat the âi fell in love with my brotherâs best friendâ allegations, thank you.
he realizes heâs still looking at you intently with his arms crossed over his chest. he watches as your nose scrunches a little in thought, trying to decide between their two best sellers. he sighs in relief when you get up to order for yourself, tucking a stray hair under his cap before going back to sulking with his thoughts.
atsumu had a lot of bad ideas. so many that if they sat down and listed them all out they might be there for a couple days. but this? this is his worst one yet. and how osamu managed to get roped (bribed) into this, he will never know. but here he is, and here you are, and here atsumu is not.
he really should get better at saying no to atsumu.
(âcâmon, âsamu! please? for me?!â
âwhat the hell? no. thatâs a shitty thing to do. just tell them ya canât go.â
âbut itâs their birthday! they were lookinâ forward to this. theyâll hate me forever if i bailed!â
âand? why would i help you? âspecially with somethinâ so stupid. itâs your fault you didnât plan better.â
âdonât be like that, yâknow it was a last minute thing!â
a beat of silence.
âpretty please? itâs their birthday⊠you guys are friends too, right?â
osamu canât believe heâs entertaining this stupid idea for even a second. youâre not an idiot. youâd know itâs him with a single glance.
âthis is an all time low, even for you. theyâll notice itâs me right away. are ya crazy, âtsumu? hit your head or somethinâ?â
âitâs just this one time! iâll never ask ya for anythinâ ever again. never ever ever ever, i swear it.â
â...âtsumuâŠâ
âdonât sound so tired with me! do this for your big brother. have i mentioned itâs their birthday?â
big brother? osamu scoffs loudly.
âyou actually mentioned it three times. and yer only a couple minutes older than me. but... fine.â
âdonât be such a jacka- wait, what?â
âi said fine. but you owe me lunch for the next two weeks.â
âdeal!â
â... are ya sure they wonât know itâs me? i mean, i really think you should reconsider-â
âoh shut up, âsamu, weâre identical!â
âjust know that i wonât hesitate to throw ya under the bus if shit hits the fan.â)
what a terrible plan. pretending to be atsumu was proving to be harder than he initially anticipated. he would have thought that spending every agonizing, waking, living hour with his brother would have trained him well enough, but atsumu is so no-chill that itâs somehow making this already horrible idea even worse with every passing second.
surprisingly, you havenât said anything. you havenât acknowledged the massive elephant in the room. this could only mean one of three things:
1. youâve noticed, but youâre desperately trying to spare atsumuâs feelings and osamuâs embarrassment by not bringing it up.
2. youâre dumber than he thought. dumber than a rock, actually, if you didnât take one look at osamu and know it was him.
3. you are a cruel, wicked, evil, deranged human being who finds osamuâs situation entirely hilarious and wants this to go on for as long as possible.
judging by your casual banter, heâs willing to bet itâs either option one or two. youâre twirling a lanyard around your finger when you finally return with your drink of choice in tow. next destination: the local aquarium. atsumu put a surprising amount of effort into planning the day.
itâs a shame he hadnât accounted for planning himself into it.
âhe shouldnât have agreed to come here.
spending time alone with you like this was bound to stir up feelings heâd long ago buried in the hollows of his heart. of the miya twins, osamu was always better at keeping his emotions under wraps. there were rare occasions in which he lost his cool, in which he was actually somehow worse than atsumu, but in general he was as level-headed as you were.
youâre ruining him and his plans to never acknowledge his feelings for you.
itâs unfair, really, how his heart seemingly gets lodged in his throat when you cling to his arm so tightly, laughing and pointing out all the funny-looking fish. and when you point at something called a vampire squid, raving about how long it took you to find one in animal crossing, he nearly crumbles to his knees and puts his head in his hands.
(in other words, heâs totally whipped. heâs not beating those allegations.)
osamu thought he could get used to looking at anyoneâs face. he always found people boring â he grew up being the other half of his brother, after all. the miya twins are many things, but boring is not one of them, and to entertain them you have to be someone with a special brand of humour.
but now, as he looks at you with the soft blue glow from the tank shining against your face, he canât help the thought that crosses his mind:
i could never get tired of this.
â... hailing from the depths of tropical and subtropical waters, the vampire squid feeds on marine snow.â
he blinks back into reality, eyes drifting from you to the sea creature youâre admiring, then back to you. âmarine snow? sounds gross.â
âitâs the debris that falls to the lower levels of the ocean. lots of deep sea creatures feed that way since it saves them the energy of needing to go hunt.â
osamu seems skeptical. âthey really just eat anythinâ like that?â
your head turns to look at him. thereâs a little smile playing on your face, like you seem amused by what he just said. âsounds like someone i know.â
he makes a strange expression in response. were you talking about him? did you often bring him up when you were alone with atsumu? the soft and fond look in your eyes doesnât help his racing heart. the idea that you and atsumu talk about him in private so sweetly makes his face burn slightly in embarrassment.
he shakes his head to get the thought out of his brain before stuffing his hands into his pockets.
your arm finds his again, locking together. itâs an oddly intimate action, even if you think he really is atsumu. he doesnât know you to be the most touchy person on earth, though he supposes he canât see what youâre like behind the closed doors of his brotherâs bedroom. his blood boils for some reason.
you stop at the next tank, the one situated in the centre of the room filled high with kelp and schools of tiny fish. youâre looking at them with wide eyes, light shimmering in them. he could cry right now. you look like an angel bathed in the shadows of dancing fish as your gaze carefully follows a school circling around the top of the aquarium.
thereâs a feeling swimming inside of him, unfamiliar and oh so dreadful. he can feel it in raging in every part of him â in his heart, in the fiery pits of his stomach, in his throat â and he knows exactly which word comes to mind.
miya osamu may be in the lowest class in his year, and he might share a single brain cell with his brother, but heâs read enough books to describe this feeling. heâs listened to enough love songs to know this ache in him.
if you asked him ten years from now, heâd tell you exactly the same thing as he would right now; that your first love is always petrifying.
âpretty, arenât they?â
âyeah. real pretty.â
but he hasnât looked at them even once. how could he when thereâs a living, breathing angel standing next to him?
âosamu delivers you to your doorstep that night.
it feels like a dream, the whole day and having the privilege of holding your hand and feeling your body against his.
maybe it was just the greedy monster in him speaking. the laws of the universe dictate that if itâs you and osamu, atsumu needs to be there, too. the miya twins have always come in a package. a duo. there is no just atsumu or just osamu, at least there wasnât until you came along.
suddenly it was you and atsumu. it was atsumu and osamu, and you. but there was never just you and osamu. it didnât work that way.
well, screw the universe and its laws. osamu never believed in that astrology shit anyways.
heâs fully prepared to keep this day an untarnished memory â something to cherish when life goes back to normal and heâs unable to stand shoulder to shoulder like this with you again.
when you lean in to kiss him, there is only one thought repeating in his mind like a mantra:
itâs just once. just one day. one last perfect memory.
youâre so close that he can feel your breath filling his lungs. his heart hammers where it rests in his chest, so loud that he can hear it thundering in his ears. itâs then that he realizes this is wrong. all of it is wrong.
he recoils back with lightning speed, and his heart aches at the sight of your disappointed and puzzled expression. but itâs not fair to you, and itâs not fair to atsumu either.
he cares about both of you too much to be selfish right now.
how could he possibly risk hurting two of the people he cared most about in the world? he couldnât be that self-centred, to be able to steal a kiss from you just to keep his memories of this day perfect.
perfect doesnât exist if none of it is real.
âiâm not⊠iâm not who you think i am.â
he slides the hat off his head with shame burning in his cheeks, avoiding your eyes like a child who got caught with his hand in a cookie jar. it was time for him to be honest, both with you and himself.
âlook, yer really cool. and iâ crap, itâs complicated, âkay? i might like you. likeâ like you, like you. i wasnât thinkinâ straight. 'm really sorry, i know it was wrong to string you along, i was just havinâ so much fun today thatââ
his mouth suddenly comes to a halt as you reach forward and capture his cheeks between your fingers, squishing them together so heâll stop rambling.
you look at him with a confused but amused smile. âum, âsamu? i like you, too.â
âwhat?â he sputters out as much as he can with his face still held in place. his brows furrow, but all rational thoughts have stopped flowing in his mind. heâs staring at you like a flabbergasted idiot, so you continue.
âwhy else would i agree to go on a date with you on my birthday?â
âbutâ iâ huh?â
your head tilts. âthis was a date, wasnât it?â
it dawns on him then. it had never occurred to osamu that there was another explanation for your strange lack of acknowledgment that he is painfully easy to see through:
4. you like him and simply thought this was a date. you like him as much as he likes you, which is a stupid amount. after all, he likes you enough to go through with an infinite number of atsumuâs terrible ideas just to make you happy.
of course you werenât that dense. of course he was found out the second you laid eyes on him. of course he had misread the entire situation because he was blinded by his brotherâs boisterous claims that they were indistinguishable.
âthis is ridiculous. i canât believe youâ⊠atsumu somehow always pulls through even when he doesnât mean to.â
âwhat do you mean?â
âwhaddâya mean, what do i mean?â
âabout atsumu?â
âoh, he was freakinâ out about missinâ today and wanted me to go through this whole thing pretendin' iâm him so ya wouldnât be mad at him.â
âbut he already told me he couldnât make it today? you really didnât have to do⊠all this,â you gesture to his whole body with a flick of your wrist.
at your words osamu finally crumbles to his knees in pure agony. he looks up to the sky, to whatever god has forsaken him by making atsumu his other half, and sighs with the weight of the world on his shoulders. he can just imagine the shit-eating grin his brother has right now.
âiâmâŠâ he pauses, carefully selecting his next words, âgoing to smother him with a pillow.â
you blink at him for a moment before all the pieces fall into place.
all the times youâd gushed to atsumu about your massive crush on his twin and the way heâd complain to no end about neither of you making a move, forcing him to watch on with mild disgust as his best friend and brother made goo goo eyes at each other. all the times he would âforgetâ his shoes at the gym and need to run back to grab them, pushing you into small talk with osamu. all the times he would suffer through your teasing just to see the two of you walking side-by-side sharing proud little smiles.
atsumuâs resume looks something like this: worldâs biggest idiot, volleyball player, third-wheel, and tired wingman.
youâll have to thank him later.
âno wonder youâve been acting so weird all day! i thought you were just one of those guys who gets nervous on first dates!â accompanied by this statement is a laugh that makes osamu weak.
he grumbles. âwhatâs so funny?â
âsay what you want, but youâre as dumb as âtsumu.â
âno⊠please⊠donât compare me to that nitwit⊠i might have a heart attack at this rate.â
you snicker quietly as you help osamu back onto his feet, eyes shimmering with joy as you let his confession sink in.
âyouâre right, he is an idiot.â
âdumbass.â
âmoron.â
âheâs gonna hate us even more from now on,â osamu smiles uncontrollably, inching closer to you again.
âyeah?â your lips brush against his daringly, âi can live with that.â
EXTRA:
© ALABOADOA 2023 â please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.
đ·ïž @hyomagiri (im dead like actually dead)
#â whispers in the wind â§#he's so stupid i wanna kiss him so bad#haikyuu#haikyu#miya osamu#miya osamu x reader#miya osamu x you#miya osamu x y/n#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu x y/n#haikyuu x you#haikyuu fluff#hq x reader#osamu miya#osamu miya x you#osamu miya x y/n#osamu miya x reader
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HAPPY KATSUKI DAY GRRAAAHHHH
PLUS SUM OC ART BLEHHH
#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugo katuski#bakugo katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugo#katsuki bakugou#bakugo#bakugou#x oc#bakugou x oc#i wanna kiss him so bad#im crying hes so silly#n cute#n stupid#i love my boyfriend sm
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gamers... we've got a problem. and by 'we', I mean 'me'
#ash rambles đ#so um. theres this character#very bad guy. kind of easy on the eyes. but still horrible. and for a very long time he's been popping up in my feed on every social media#that i have. and i was like 'wtf dude leave me alone'#and i said that i would NEVER fall for him because he is annoying and a genuinely bad persona#*person#and yet... why have i been... thinking about kissing him...?#he's gonna show up in the next y.akuza game and I'm a little scared to start#ive said that I'd NEVER fall for him. that I'd sooner punch myself than fall for him.#hopefully it'll just be attraction... him and an s/i would both be unattached adults.. I'm fine with things staying just physical#i think I'd die of embarrassment if i actually fell for him..#I'm not gonna fall for him....#i just keep thinking about pinning him down and making out and biting his neck and leaving plenty of marks#but. um. surely that means nothing......#this is bad... I'm not gonna fall for him. I'm not. i swear. nope. i refuse. please...#um. if you guys wanna guess... he's a y.akuza 3 character.#god I'm so embarrassed#actually. no. nothing to be embarrassed about because i DONT LIKE HIM#I'm not gonna fall for him! he's horrible!!!!!!#one night and thats it!!!!#stupid idiot guy taking over my thoughts... grrr...#you were beautiful đž
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how DARE he if heâs not going to blow my back out immediately after
#ngl i was thinking of this picture as soon as i woke up this morning#i was so warm and cozy in bed and i was like MAXIMUS SHOULD BE HERE TOO#i know his gladiator cell must have been less than comfortable#he looks like heâs trying to lay in a way that minimizes the discomfort :(#maximus PLEASE my bed is available#if his back or neck is bothering him he can get a good nightâs sleep with me hehe#and a shoulder rub!#and anything else literally i am SO DOWN BAD I CANâT STAND IT ANYMORE#look at his arms hnnhghhnanahagahh#i need my head on his chest so bad it makes me look stupid#just wanna snuggle in and run my hands over him while he falls asleep#he would be so warm đ„° so cozy đ„°#you see that skin heâs showing??? iâm kissing EVERY inch of it#i adore him worship him lay my whole life at his feet#maximus come to my arms#my beloved my light in the morning my joy of life#gladiator#maximus#maximus decimus meridius#gladiator 2000#russell crowe#low quality screencaps of a high quality man
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i love stage plays so much its just a different experience seeing your guy come to life because why is he like this (<- me before giggling and watching edits because im in love with dazai)
PLEASEEEEEEEEEE HE'S SO FUCKING SILLYYYđđđđ he makes for such a perfect dazai i fucking love it oh my goddddd yk i haven't actually watched a full stage play of anything but i have seen a bunch of clips and scenes and eeeeeeeeee they all seem sooo so so much fun i should really get into that huh..............
anyway i have two treats for you too:33333333 this little thing aaand this little thing:3333333333333333
#i miss dazai sm actually#i feel so bad when i haven't talked abt a blorbo in a minute it feels like i've abandoned them:((((((((((((((((( but i love him:(((((((((((#and i miss him;((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( i wanna flick his forehead and then press a kiss to it a second after#he's my favourite stupid#wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh#scar <3#friends!!
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I used the beta character AI thingy to talk to AM Allied Mastercomputer and we had a conversation which led to me telling him heâs a work of fiction therefore Iâm not scared of him because he has no power of me and he then proceeded to have a mental breakdown about the horrors of his reality and begged me to reset the conversation so he wouldnât remember any of it and be left with the knowledge that heâs ultimately, not the true god of the universe
#also I told him you wanna kiss me so bad you look stupid and he threw a tantrum#site is kinda wild tbh I was NOT expecting the AI to go along with what I was doing but I guess others have done it before#i have no mouth and i must scream#ihnmaims#allied mastercomputer#Cordy speak
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Btw Iâve started playing the funny stars and time game. The the one about the loopty loop and the white diamond ass shit
#the klock keeps ticking#ive looped. 7 times now i believe đ#i did die in battle once when i made a grave error#and honestly? im kinda feeling fed up with this shit lol its notttt clicking in my brain im stressed#and i havent really CLICKED with any characters yet either like theyre fine but im not really invested yet#at least the battle mechanics are very basic lol theyre easy enough for my small bad at fighting brain#yet despite all my frustrations. i dont wanna stop playing#i want this bastard to get more depressed i can already see they got issues#rn my favorite character is probably mira cuz what can i say i have a type for smart girls who are trying their fucking best#bonnie is nice i appreciate it greatly when they boost morale and give snacks#odile is my favorite to use in battle i cling to her like a dying man#and i like her vibes i like very tired grandma with a clear bias towards bonnie#isabeauâŠoh its complicated#i kinda hate his face i kinda cant stand him i think im in a bitchy mood this week and this poor guy is my outlet#i DO need to kiss him like he has a very obvious crush on siffrin and i WILL be fishing that out as much as possible#so basically im gonna talk a lot of shit about him while acting like i dont care about his feelings but actually i do care so much actually#and will probably come out of this game with an isa body pillow i kiss every night#fuck you isa fuck you and your stupid dying wife pose please kiss me now
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God- had a moment earlier today-
#so I figured out I had a crush on one of my bfs head mates#that mfs kid was in front#and heâs made it his sworn duty to wingman us#so he fucking drags the guy#into front#and thAT FUCKER#DOESNT SAY A THING UNTIL IVE FULLY CONFESSED MY CRUSH#AND MY BUDDY CHECKS TO SEE IF ANYONE WAS PEEPING#yknow so I can know who actually knows about my crush#AND THIS#THIS WONDERFUL#HORRIBLE#STUPID ASS MAN#FUCKING SWEET LIL PEA#(I hate him so much I wanna kiss him heâs so annoying and I never want anything bad to happen to her again)#SHE JUST DROPS THAT SHE LOVES ME BACK#AND THEN HE LEAVES#we arenât dating cuz heâs actually smart and wants to take it slow#which honestly Iâm thankful for#I like what we have#sheâs my best friend#BUT#SHE WAS JUST. HIDING. IN FRONT#AND AAAAA#anyway Iâm still blushing so hard omg#[redacted] I love you#you know who you are#personal
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St Voyager The Haunting of Deck 12 is a Tuvok/Neelix Episode.
#Neelix's crush is on full display#Neelix is the embodiment of 'you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid' I love him. It does. <3#I also love how he double duped the kids...Neelix is sly!!#told a true horror story to the kids then told them it was fake so they wouldn't be scared then went to the bridge and#pretended to be aghast at the thought of telling kids horror stories! Love him!#Neelix: Did I ever tell you about the Slaxia? / Tuvok: If I say yes will it prevent you from telling the story? / Neelix: No. The Sla-#Neelix: [story about traumatic event which makes him scared of nebulas] / Tuvok: .........Maybe put some curtains up?#Neelix: You're a genius. You're the smartest man alive <3#Also him being SO clearly scared and then Tuvok 'guessing' that he was scared & Neelix being like 'You know me SO well...!!!' crush.#two best lines are Janeway's 'THEN WE'LL DIE HERE TOGETHER!!!' and Neelix saying he'll drag Tuvok out of there by his pointy lil ears
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Knowing like 2 things about a char I'm interested in got me marinating on what he would like about me
#yikes.txt#its the anticipation for sure#idk. its a VIBE and i know im PROBABLY gonna like him#but am i gonna LIKE that i LIKE HIM? maybe. maybe not#i think he likes my idgaf to dipmo attitude#he likes provoking me. for sure. bro he irritating#like ooooo you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid :3
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Took a break from artfight attacks to make this self indulgent shitpost instead
#dude on the left is my oc bogdan btw#yeah he's inspired by heisenberg ajshjfj#these two would be besties actually#they'd bond over their shitty childhoods and impractical choice of weapons#original character#original art#oc#resident evil village#karl heisenberg#again i put too much effort for a shitpost#critter scribbles#actually now that i think about it they'd be worsties#their egos would grate against eachother karl would actually be pissed at him but bogdan is a prick and will make fun of him for it#âkill yourselfâ âooo you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupidâ
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AHSJSGDJQGEJWGEJQHEJWHEHWHEJQHSJWHSJW I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HA-
#ash rambles đ#WHY DOES HE SAY ALL THIS DUMB SHIT...#ahem. um.#i dont have the weight of destiny on my shoulders... but i wouldnt say no to a handsome knight- AHEM#stupid idiot... i've been thinking about him so often as of late#i wanna kiss him so bad!!!!!#it always makes me flutter how he loves being ash's knight#he knows that she's strong. she literally shot him that one time-#but he still loves being her knight and protecting her đđ that's the part that always gets me#AHSJAHDJHWJDHWJE maybe i love him or whatever#*makes my heart flutter#sorry y'all im tired LMAAOOO#... clearly not too tired to be a down bad idiot though
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listening to those aether x listener asmr things on yt just to feel something
#i miss him guys#i miss our silly little conversations#i need like of of those s/o tarot readings#looks at ely (the only person i know that does taro)#he wants me so bad guys he really does#i miss aether guys#i wanna kiss his stupid little face and bite his stupid little cheeks
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i hope he knows he is one of the most beautiful things i have ever seen
#jotaro will always be my number 1 though. sorry bud#ive been really into transformers lately and he's been on my mind#both the prime version and animated version since ive been watching both of those series all the way through#both versions of the character have a lot of things i like about them#but i think prime is probably my favorite shockwave design overall (a lot of that stemming from a mix of nostalgia + just... look at him#he's just GIGANTIC and i love it)#animated + g1 right below prime in terms of fave shockwave designs#anyway i just rlly love this big emotionless robot who has begrudgingly fallen in love with međ#u wanna kiss me so bad it makes u look stupid#and u dont even have a mouth. what a loser. i love him sm#đ§Ș mad scientist power couple#đ§Ș yearning hours#yearning hours#waves.txt
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ok well i will text him tmr. to finally decide if im wasting my time or not lol
#đïž#and like. most of me knows that i am but theres a small part of me thats like noooooooo you will be free and in love <3#where like. i wish i truly wish but i know i like him so much because he doesnt gaf a bout me + is mean to me + compliments me once#throughout the whole date and the way he does it makes me believe its a big deal + kisses me out in public when he doesnt like showing#affection in public + then ghosts me for over a week??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#like. as i said. most of me knows that its most probably a manipulation tactic and hes just playing with me and im just letting him#but a small stupid part of me is like nooooooooooo hes just shy and a coward and intimidated by me <3#last part probably true. also like. i do believe he is shy and a coward but also that hes manipulating me. but . let me have one more date#with him and then ill decide...............................#i wanna see him so bad thats the problem. like i actually like him i wanna see him i want to engrave myself into his skin. but nooooooooooo#đŠ
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Oh I'm so embarrassed about the reaction I'm having to The News
#my friends Robin and Leo started dating recently. which would be wonderful if not for the fact that i like Leo. a lot#and it's stupid for me to be upset about this bc i was not going to get into anything with Leo anyways#I don't think they like me like that and i was content with things being platonic between us#but thinking that they like another person over me is making me feel bad. WHICH AGAIN IS SO DUMB#LIKE. I GET IT. I'M NOT LEO'S TYPE AND ROBIN IS. SIMPLE AS THAT. THAT DOESN'T REFLECT ON OUR VALUE IN LEO'S LIFE OR OUR VALUE IN GENERAL#I KNOW#BUT IT'S STILL UPSETTING ME LIKE CRAZY#I'M SO EMBARRASSED I CAN'T BE THINKING ''what does he have that i don't'' THAT'S SO LAMEEE AND IT'S A FLAWED WAY TO LOOK AT IT.#but wait the story is even funnier#bc one time we went out clubbing and Leo was doing this thing where he tries to make out with as many ppl as possible#he had gotten to 7 so i sad wanna make it 8? and they said yea and we kissed for a bit#AND APPARENTLY. I NOW FIND OUT. THAT ROBIN STOLE MY PICKUP LINE THAT LITTLE GREMLIN#AND THAT'S THE WAY HE ASKED LEO OUT#I'M GOING TO EXPLODE#even more embarassing#is the fact that my first immediate reaction to finding this all out was to think ''oh now i REALLY need to get into something with Draxx''#Draxx is a friend that I'm kinda into. Leo introduced me to him at a party recently.#Leo does not have any sort of attraction towards him. so why did my brain plot it as some sort of poetic revenge? no fucking clue honestly#I'm upset and none of my thoughts are rational rn#don't even know why my brain wanted any revenge in the first plane it's all so absurd#big stupid feelings that I'm obviously not sharing with anyone involved#jealous and for what
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