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georgewashington-official · 3 months

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Now, most men answer like you because they don't have the experience that women have. But over 90% of women who were asked this question chose the bear. Because a forest is a bears natural habitat. It's supposed to be there. Why is a man in a forest?

First of all, main reason on why bear is the safer is because bears are predictable. There are known and recorded ways to avoid a bear attack. And if you do it right, you are very likely to be safe. Men aren't. HUMANS aren't. You never know what they might do and there is no way to fool them.

Second, bears would attack if they're hungry, if they see you as a threat, or if you're near their home. Especially if they have babies. Or maybe all those three combined. Something common in all of those reasons? None of them are the bears fault. The bear does it to protect and feed itself, like it's supposed to be done in nature. Meanwhile, if a men were to attack, it would be for no reason other than their twisted, sick mentality. Why would a man attack a girl in a forest? First and most reasonable thing that comes to mind is for sexual purposes. For what else? Is he doing it to steal from her? They're in a forest, there's no need. And we both know a man wouldn't see a girl as a threat.

You don't know this, but for most women, being raped and living with that pain and memory and trauma is a fate worse than death. Which is why they prefer the possibility of getting mauled and die within maximum minutes by a bears hand, than the possibility of fighting and crying in pain and agony for their lives for what seems like forever to them under a man.

And the worst part is? After a bear kills you, it would either eat you or leave your dead body there. But a man would rape a dead body as well. It's a whole thing, necrophilia. For short, the girl is in danger whether it's a man or a bear. But if she ends up dying, if it's by a bear, it'll be a cause of nature. If it's by a man, it'll be a cause of a disgusting, twisted mind.

The only creatures who have shown interest in forced sex are humans and dolphins. And I'm not pulling these stats out if my ass, believe me. I'll show the the receipts. I've done my research.

Ehem; "The 750,000 black bears of North America kill less than one person per year on the average, while men ages 18-24 are 167 times more likely to kill someone than a black bear. Most attacks by black bears are defensive reactions to a person who is too close, which is an easy situation to avoid."

"On average, there are 433,648 victims (age 12 or older) of rape and sexual assault each year in the United States. 1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed, 2.8% attempted)." Oh and mind you, this is just the ones in the United States. Not even the ones per year all across the world.

"According to the National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, women experience about 4.8 million intimate partner-related physical assaults and rapes every year. Less than 20 percent of battered women sought medical treatment following an injury."

"One in 9 girls and 1 in 20 boys under the age of 18 experience sexual abuse or assault. 82% of all victims under 18 are female. Females ages 16-19 are 4 times more likely than the general population to be victims of rape, attempted rape, or sexual assault. Out of the sexual abuse cases reported to CPS in 2013, 47,000 men and 5,000 women were the alleged perpetrators. In 88% of the sexual abuse claims that CPS substantiates or finds supporting evidence of, the perpetrator is male. In 9% of cases they are female, and 3% are unknown."

These are all laid out on the internet. And I'm sure by now you know very well how you can find everything in the internet. I haven't changed a single thing about these stats. Copy pasted, exact same. And yes, internet is not always right, but these are researches and statistics made by people who know what they're doing, and all of these quotes were taken from trusted sites.

I hope the facts I've given you, along with statistic numbers, my own opinion and the fact that most women choose the bear, I'll be able to change your mind. This got long, sorry, I'm just very passionate about this subject, as a child who was sexually assaulted. And as a grown women now, I often find myself waking up from the nightmares of the memory, wishing he would have killed me after getting off.

This is terrible.

If you go like this you will have to live in your own house for all eternity and never come out, anon. Bacause there are men outside. Because there are other humans outside.

I think it is irritating that this is a man. Why not a woman? Are women not capable of killing? Or is it that those cases are not as reported as mens?

The narrative of the question is a simple one: We know nothing about both parties involved. We don't know if the bear has cubs, is rabid or whatever. Just as we don't know if the man is a bad man.

What if he's just a hiker? Or a hunter/wood worker? So you give up your chance to be safe because he's a man?

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readingforsanity · 1 year

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The Wife Who Knew Too Much | Michelle Campbell | Published 2020 | *SPOILERS*

From Michele Campbell, the bestselling author of It’s Always the Husband comes a new blockbuster thriller in The Wife Who Knew Too Much.

Tabitha Girard had her heart broken years ago by Connor Ford. He was preppy and handsome. She was a pool girl at his country club. Their affair should have been a summer fling. But it meant everything to Tabitha.

Years later, Connor comes back into Tabitha’s life - older, richer and desperately unhappy. He married for money, a wealthy, neurotic, controlling woman whom he never loved. He has always loved Tabitha.

When Connor’s wife Nina takes her own life, he’s free. He can finally be with Tabitha. Nina’s home, Windswept, can be theirs. It seems to be the perfect ending to a fairy tale romance that began so many years ago. But then, Tabitha finds a diary. “I’m writing this to raise an alarm in the event of my untimely death,” it begins. “If I die unexpectedly, it was foul play, and Connor was behind it. Connor - and her.”

Who is Connor Ford? Why did he marry Nina? Is Tabitha his true love, or a convenient affair? As the police investigate Nina’s death, is she a convenient suspect?

As Tabitha is drawn deeper into the dark glamour of a life she is ill-prepared for, it becomes clear to her that what a wife knows can kill her.

Tabitha remembers everything about Connor, the young summer love that she had when she was just 17 years old, and he was 19. She was working at the country club where his family had been a member, coming from a prominent family. Though the two of them shouldn’t have been together, they had a romance that lasted a lifetime, for the both of them.

As an adult, Tabitha is still living in the area, her grandparents who raised her have since passed on and she is working as a waitress trying to make ends meet. She married and divorced a man named Derek, and even had a misdemeanor charge on her record because of him after he was caught selling drugs and she had gotten caught in the crossfire. One evening, Connor returns to the restaurant and Tabitha is floored. It had been several years since they’d last even spoke to one another, yet there he was, returning into her life as if he had never left.

Claiming to be there on business, Connor invites her back to the ski lodge where he is staying, a home that belongs to a friend of his wife’s. Connor is now married to the eclectic Nina Levitt, who was once married to Edward Levitt, a prominent businessman who had died three years ago. Nina married Connor after just a few short months of knowing each other after meeting at her annual fourth of July party.

Connor, despite being an otherwise happily married man, gets back into old habits with Tabitha. The two of them end up spending the entire weekend with each other getting to know one another again. Connor states that he is going to leave Nina, as he was looking for a way out but had to do so cautiously, as if he had gotten caught cheating, the prenup that was signed wouldn’t allow him to take any of Nina’s immense fortune. He had to come up with a way to make her think that the divorce was her idea, so he could walk away with the $10 million promised to him.

A month goes by without so much as a word from one another. Nina is on the brink of requesting a divorce from Connor, as she has found evidence that he has been cheating on her. In a diary on the night of the 4th of July party, she writes that if she ends up dead, it is at the hands of her husband and her though this “her” isn’t named. Tabitha finds out that she is pregnant, and is desperately trying to get in touch with Connor to inform him of the news, but they had agreed not to speak until after everything had gotten worked out.

Instead of waiting, Tabitha drives to Southampton, New York and ends up on the beach walking up to Nina’s estate during her fourth of July party. However, Derek, her ex-husband had followed her there, and attacks one of Nina’s security agents. With him occupied, Tabitha was able to sneak into the party in hopes of getting away from Derek. But when she sees Nina and Connor together, she seems upset that Connor isn’t make more of an effort to leave her, and is eventually caught, and taken to the police. The officer believes her when she says she was trying to get away from her ex-husband who had followed her onto the beach, claiming she had been in the area visiting a friend, not trying to party crash.

Nina returns to her life, and eventually finds out that Nina Levitt was found dead the morning after the party. She was found in her swimming pool. Her death was being ruled a suicide. Tabitha calls Connor, and he explains that Nina had recently been diagnosed with lung cancer after having smoked a lot when she was young, was given a prescription for pain killers. She must have overdosed, and somehow ended up in the pool, effectively completing suicide. Connor wants to see Tabitha, but says that they need to take things slowly as not to muck up any of the investigation into Nina’s death, and so it wouldn’t look bad that Connor has moved on so suddenly with another woman. But Tabitha comes clean about the pregnancy.

A few months later, she and Connor are married, and her pregnancy is taking off, to the point where it is becoming obvious that she is expecting. When Connor has to go on another business trip, she returns to his first wife’s estate, where they will be living. This idea makes her uncomfortable, as she knows none of the staff employed there and worries that people will think less of her because of Connor’s quickie marriage with her. But, she meets Juliet, Nina’s former personal assistant and Gloria, the housekeeper.

Though she feels uncomfortable, she takes to her new life fairly easily. Deciding to keep the pregnancy a surprise for now, with hopes to announce it later to make people believe that the baby was conceived on the honeymoon, this plan is foiled when Juliet is found inside the en suite bath and finds Tabitha’s prenatal vitamins. At first, she seems shocked and upset by this, but quickly says her congratulations before moving on.

Life continues, but Tabitha’s life becomes hectic. Nina’s estranged sister Kara is suing Connor for Nina’s estate, claiming that Connor was involved in her death. Tabitha is being photographed by paparazzi wearing items that once belonged to Nina, further looking like she and Connor had something to do with Nina’s death. This is all too much for Tabitha in her fragile state.

After a particular incident occurs, Connor, on a business trip in Dubai, tells Tabitha that he wants her to come to Dubai with him, and to have Juliet escort her. Of course, this looks bad to authorities who believe that they are fleeing the country, especially after the police show up at the house with a warrant that they didn’t have before in regards to Kara’s lawsuit. Tabitha and Juliet travel to Dubai together, and the trip goes otherwise smoothly. Connor’s former flame, Lauren, apologizes for the behavior she had to Tabitha in the past during a business dinner, and when they return to the United States, Tabitha is arrested for murder in the second degree in the death of Nina Levitt.

Tabitha is taken to jail, and Connor sends a corporate lawyer to represent her the following day at her bail hearing. This lawyer is less than prepared to deal with a criminal case, and the public defender instead takes over. The two of them agree to meet with the DA to discuss the evidence against them in order to see what sort of thing they’re dealing with. With Connor suspiciously missing from the court hearing, Tabitha begins to believe that he was somehow involved in her death and was now trying to blame her for it.

She is released on bail, and part of the agreement that she came up with the prosecution and her lawyer was to wear an ankle monitor that will monitor her whereabouts while at home, as well as record anything that could be used against Connor or anyone else that was involved in the murder of Nina. The ankle monitor is fitted to Tabitha, and she goes to speak with Gloria, the housekeeper. She makes some comments to Tabitha that makes it seem like she knows more about Nina’s death than she has let on, and tells her that there is a diary under her pillow in the master suite.

This diary was Nina’s, and the only entry was from the night before she was discovered murdered before the party. Nina says that Juliet is really Julissa Davila, a young woman who Connor had briefly dated in college who had gone missing about three or four years ago. Julissa changed her name to Juliet Davis, and was hired by Nina as her personal assistant who was none the wiser to who she really was. Nina believed that she and Connor had been together the entire time, and were conspiring to kill her in order to inherit her fortune. Juliet drugs Nina’s drink with opiods.

Tabitha is shocked by this revelation, and goes to the third floor where the employee’s quarters are located in hopes to find Gloria. In the diary, it seems like Juliet is after something of Nina’s that she believes is rightfully hers, but she isn’t sure what. She finds Gloria’s room unoccupied, but notices a picture of her and Juliet together, though Gloria looks uncomfortable. She enters Juliet’s room, and finds what she was looking for: a birth certificate with the name Julissa Davila, with the mother listed as Gloria Davila and father unknown. Tabitha is able to discern that Gloria is Julissa’s mother, and that her father was Edward Levitt. Julissa was after the fortune Nina inherited from Edward and because she was his child, believes that she was entitled to it.

Connor finds Tabitha snooping, and the two of them go down to their bedroom where he explains. Connor wasn’t involved in Nina’s death, and had an inkling that Julissa was, but wasn’t sure he would be able to prove it. They had dated briefly, though Julissa was more interested in the relationship that he had been. The two of them had a falling out after she attempted suicide, but not wanting to further hurt her mental health, decided to stay in touch with her as friends. Years go by, and she had found out about her true parentage through the adoption records. Wanting to meet her birth mother, she wrote to Gloria, but Gloria had no interest in meeting her as it would be too painful, but did say that she had been raped at 17 years old. Julissa was able to discern that Edward was the perpetrator in her mother’s rape. She attemtped to sue him but as she was already over 18 years old, he had no obligation to be financially responsible for her.

This greatly upset Julissa. After Edward’s death, she applied to work for Nina, changing her name to Juliet. She was hired, and Julissa had given Connor the idea to apply for the position he had started when he first met Nina in the PR department. Connor says that at first, his relationship with Nina was meant to be a joke, but he really, truly did care about her in the beginning until he returned to New Hampshire and he and Tabitha reconnected. He had nothing to do with Nina’s murder, and had he believed Julissa was truly capable of killing Nina, he would have gone to the police sooner.

All of this is recorded on her ankle monitor, but nothing is able to come of this as Julissa appears with a gun. She shoots Connor in the foot when he is trying to protect Tabitha. Tabitha’s intution about Juliet being upset about her pregnancy had been true, as she was trying to get rid of Nina so she and Connor could live happily ever after with her fortune. She was not expecting this estranged sister to come into the picture, and she wasn’t expecting Connor to marry again so quickly, let alone have gotten someone else pregnant. This greatly upset her, but she also had a co-conspiator in Steve Kovacs, the security professional that Nina, and eventually, Connor had hired.

His involvement isn’t truly known, other than he was working with Julissa on whatever it was she was after. Julissa and Steve take Tabitha and Connor hostage, having removed her ankle bracelet. Tabitha was able to deactivate it by releasing the monitor’s panic button with notified the police but not in enough time. Connor, though handcuffed, attacks Steve and tells Tabitha to run, but not before Julissa shoots him in the abdomen.

When Tabitha comes too after being knocked out by Steve, they’re in the car working their way to the ski lodge where everything first started. She tells her captors that Connor needs help, that he is losing a lot of blood and won’t make it if they don’t do something, but neither of them listen. Kovacs keeps her hostage in a bedroom, hooked to a heater inside of the room, but she is able to escape. When she gets to the road, a passing motorist stops to assist her, and there is a shootout between Kovacs and Julissa with the police.

Tabitha is taken to the hospital, and is told the baby will be okay. She is bandaged up, and is released. She calls the detective who had set up her ankle monitor, and he is currently on the way to New Hampshire because of her involvement. Her friend, and prior boss at the restaurant where she waitressed arrives at the hospital, and the two of them wait to hear news about Connor.

When the police arrive, Tabitha is told that a body was found at the ski lodge, and they woud need her to identify the body. Tabitha doesn’t want to believe it, though she knows that it was Connor. He died to protect her and their unborn daughter. She is also asked to identify the body of Julissa, who was killed in the shootout with police, with Kovacs currently in surgery but not expected to survive either.

One year later, Tabitha is a mother to a baby girl named Meg. She has rehired Suzanne Cohen, her public defender from before, to help with the case. Connor was legally Nina’s heir, and now she was the heir to the fortune through Connor. She has no interest in the money, and she stil had to worry about Kara’s lawsuit. With Suzanne’s help, they have decided to put Nina’s fortune to charity, with $5 million going to her sister in exchange for Kara to say that Connor had nothing to do with Nina’s death. She had received $3 million from Connor’s life insurance, so she and Meg would always be taken care of, and she chooses to raise her in a town near where she grew up.

Despite everything that Tabitha went through, she has perservered.

4/5 stars on GoodReads. I didn’t see any of this coming. The book was a thriller, and was genuinely sad at the end. I was so sorry to see Connor’s character go, without having met his daughter, and without being able to say goodbye to his wife. It was an unfortunate way to go, but this book entertained me all the way through the final page.

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everybodylovesrand · 3 years

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Welcome to The Wheel of Time: Take a magical first look at Amazon's new fantasy adaptation

Or The Beginners guide to WOTonPrime, a Wheel of Time adaptation.

It's been two years since Game of Thrones went off the air, and even longer since Amazon chief Jeff Bezos directed his Prime Video team to deliver him a hit akin to the HBO supernova. Into this vacuum steps The Wheel of Time, a new drama (coming November) adapted from author Robert Jordan's best-selling series of the same name.

Spanning a whopping 15 novels, The Wheel of Time — which debuted in 1990 — seemed impossible to adapt before shows like Thrones. But while George R.R. Martin's epic beat Jordan's opus to televisions, showrunner Rafe Judkins believes WoT serves as a perfect bridge between Thrones and the earlier mythic saga The Lord of the Rings (another literary world getting a show at Amazon).

"Wheel of Time is the first fantasy series that really dove into the political and cultural worlds of all these different characters," Judkins (a former Survivor contestant and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. producer) says of the insanely popular and lengthy books. "It was also one of the first to dive into multiple POV characters, so you're following an ensemble, with each of them having their own agendas and approaches to everything. That's always felt to me like the missing piece of the fantasy-literature landscape that hasn't been brought to TV or film yet."

The Wheel of Time also differentiates itself from those other big-name franchises in the way it highlights its female characters. While Middle-earth's most prominent heroine has to disguise herself as a man, and Westeros' few female conquerors are often facing threats of sexual violence, the world of WoT is essentially matriarchal. The largest kingdom in the novels' unnamed land is ruled by a queen who will pass her crown to her daughter rather than her son, and uneasy peace is maintained by the female-only mystic order known as the Aes Sedai.

"These are not just a bunch of princesses swanning around in pretty dresses," says series costume designer Isis Mussenden. "These are women doing jobs. They're taking care of the governance; they're taking care of healing."

The Wheel of Time's most prominent Aes Sedai is Moiraine (Rosamund Pike), who rescues a handful of young villagers after monsters attack their community of Two Rivers. Though the group of new refugees doesn't trust her, "Moiraine is the guide figure in this world," explains Pike, "the mysterious stranger who comes to town and changes their lives forever. They leave with her on a journey that will either save or destroy humanity."

As a member of the Aes Sedai, Moiraine is a master at channeling a magical force called the One Power. Lifetimes earlier, both men and women were able to access the magic, but an evil known as the Dark One tainted the male half. Now any man capable of mysticism is hunted by the Aes Sedai and stripped of his abilities (a process that can turn fatal). Exemplifying this fate is Logain (Álvaro Morte), a man capable of channeling the One Power who attempts to assert himself as the reincarnation of the Dragon, a long-lost messiah. In the photos above, you can can get a glimpse of what the Aes Sedai do to him as a result.

"Just as men are often trying to shut down female power in our world, the Aes Sedai are trying to stop this man from becoming too powerful," Judkins says. "If, hypothetically, one of our male characters were able to use the One Power, they understand the stakes of it from what they see of Logain."

That scenario might be a bit more than a hypothetical. If WoT sticks to the plot of Jordan's books, Moiraine encourages her new female travel companions, Egwene (Madeleine Madden) and Nynaeve (Zoë Robins), to embrace their mystic potential. But she also suspects that one of their male cohorts may unknowingly possess "the spark" and be linked to the long-lost messiah known as the Dragon. She's just not sure if it's Rand (Josha Stradowski), Mat (Barney Harris), or Perrin (Marcus Rutherford).

While shooting in Eastern Europe over the past two years (pausing for a significant hiatus due to COVID-19), Judkins and his team felt the pressure to get Jordan's story "right" — and spared no expense crafting a world they hope is embraced by the millions of rabid WoT fans.

"We literally built Shadar Logoth from scratch just for 15 minutes of airtime, because it's that important to the series," Judkins says of the infamous abandoned city, which is haunted by such dark energy that even the monstrous Trollocs hunting our protagonists fear to tread there. "That's where it becomes very clear it's not just the forces of good and evil. There are lots of different angles."

Judkins hopes to explore all those angles as his drama expands beyond Jordan's first WoT book. It helps that Amazon has already commissioned a second season — and that an unrelated WoT prequel movie in the works is sure to boost name recognition — but Judkins knows he must bring in more than the existing die-hard fan base for any chance of his series lasting long enough to cover Jordan's epilogue. To accomplish that goal, he's relying on the author's celebrated world-building.

"I try to stick to the spine and the heart of the books, and bring that to the screen," Judkins says of his philosophy as showrunner. "If I can successfully do that, the story and the characters will sell themselves."

#Wheel of Time #WoTonPrime #Rafe Judkins #Amazon Prime

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madamewriterofwrongs · 3 years

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my sweet darling - how about an armed forces 911 AU? Maybe Eddie meets Navy Seal Buckley overseas? Maybe they meet back stateside at the VA?

You, my darling, always send me such fun and interesting prompts. I promise I didn’t forget.

Ooh, okay. Let’s see...

Prompt Me with AUs

Delta X-Ray (I am Sinking)

Read on Ao3

Eddie first sees him as he’s getting off the plane in Washington. He’s going to receive a medal. Apparently his work in Bagram made him a hero and not a broken, shell of a man. Who knew. And really, it’s just a glance because he has other things to worry about besides a Navy man getting dressed down by his captain. He doesn’t need to hear what’s being said to know that’s exactly what’s happening. He’s seen that look too many times, felt the hot breath of his superior as they spat harsh words meant to ‘toughen him up’.

As he passes the sailor, he hears something to the effect of “if it happens again, you will be dismissed.” And Eddie wonders how many times this particular man has received this exact lecture. It doesn’t really matter, anyways. He just wants to get his medal, shake a few hands of politicians who think they had anything to do with his ‘accomplishment’ and go home to his wife and child – ex-wife, he reminds himself. Shannon had the papers shipped to Afghanistan. Couldn’t get away fast enough, his mind bitterly supplied. All he would have at the end of the day was his son, and a medal to replace the wedding band he’d worn since he was 19.

Before he knows it, he’s standing on a small stage, a million lights flashing in his eyes as cameras and stage lights practically blind him. His shoulder aches – out of the sling for the afternoon so he can at least look more put together than he feels – and he’s dizzy from the attention. That’s his excuse for why he doesn’t recognize the man standing beside him.

“Seaman Petty Officer First Class Evan Buckley.” A blond man steps forward and Eddie catches himself staring at the dress whites and stone expression for longer than is strictly necessary. He seems a far cry from the officer being scolded less than an hour ago, but it is definitely him. And he was standing on stage beside Eddie, about to receive a medal of his own.

“For distinguishing oneself by heroism not involving actual conflict with an enemy of the United States, Petty Officer Buckley is awarded the Navy and Marine Corps Medal.”

As he watches the stripes being pined on the officer’s lapel, he lets himself wonder what crime the man could have committed to be dressed down and rewarded in the same afternoon.

He’s so curious, in fact, that he nearly misses his own name amongst the titles thrown around.

“Staff Sergeant Edmundo Diaz.” He steps forward, holding his breath until the entire ordeal is finally finished. “For gallantry in action against an enemy of the United States, Staff Sergeant Diaz is awarded the Silver Star.” The medal is heavier than he anticipated, but he supposes that makes sense. It is quite a burden he’ll be carrying around, and now he has a gold star to go with it – he wants to chuckle at the irony of his ‘Silver Star’ actually presenting as a golden one.

It seems everything about his life is a life.

There were a lot of reasons Eddie hated attending events like this: The politics, the bravado, the crowds of people ‘thanking him for his service’. Mostly, though: he never knows anyone. Sure, he can charm a senator or two for a few minutes, swap stories with other officers from other divisions about where they were and what they saw. But those are fleeting relationships, meant to get him through the day. He’ll go back to his hotel room at the end of the night with no more friends than when he’d stepped off the plane in this awful, awful town. Eddie is tired of ‘schmoozing’. With any luck, today will be the last time he has to tell the governor’s wife how lovely she looks in her dress.

That’s when he spots the man sitting at the edge of the bar like he’s trying to hide from the world, and he decides to make his way over.

“Do you mind if I join you?” He asks, even as he sits down.

The other man’s eyes light with recognition – and damn, are they as blue as the sea. “Not at all. Diaz, right?”

“Eddie.” He supplies, raising a finger to the bartender to snag his attention. If he is going to make it to the end of the evening, he’s going to need one, good drink. “And you’re Buckley.”

“Actually, it’s Evan but you can call me ‘Buck’.” His amusement must be evident because his new drinking buddy supplies the answer. “There are a surprising amount of ‘Evan’s in the Navy.”

It had never occurred to him to check how many ‘Eddie’s were in his squadron. Maybe he should ask his CO if that’s why he always called him by his full first name.

“Congratulations, by the way.” Buck looks somewhat nervous even as the words leave his mouth. “On your medal. Good job.”

“Oh.” Is all Eddie can bring himself to say as he stares into the bottom of his glass. “Thanks.”

“You don’t look too happy about it.”

He really isn’t doing a good job of hiding his emotions if this relative stranger ca read him so easily. “No, I-” he takes a deep breath to recalibrate his thoughts and paste his best fake smile. “It is a great honour.”

“Bullshit.” Buck laughs in his face but for some reason, Eddie doesn’t bristle nearly as hard as he expected. It almost feels playful. The rest of Buck’s response is cut off by his buzzing phone on the counter. The man quickly grabs it long enough to check his notifications, returning it to its place at the bar with a disappointed look.

“Are we keeping you from something?”

“Uh, no.” It’s Buck’s turn to look caught out and in need of recalibration. His expression changes much slower. “I’m just waiting for a call from my sister. I sent her an invitation to this thing but she never responded.”

Eddie has experience with family not coming to big social events like this one. Of course, in his case, he never invited them in the first place.

“Family ain’t easy.” He shrugs as he takes a long sip of whatever burning liquid he’d ordered – it really doesn’t matter so long as he can stay sitting here and not mingling with the crowds of vultures.

“It’s more than that.” Buck looks worried, and the way he bites his lip is… Eddie shouldn’t be focusing on that. “It’s just…” The man shakes his head, dismissing whatever feelings were eating at his gut. “I don’t want to bore you.”

“Please.” Eddie leans into his space with a playful smile. “It can’t be any more boring than this event. Please try to bore me to tears, if you dare.”

When Buck smiles, Eddie’s heart flutters out of his chest and sits beside him as they listen to Buck begin to speak. He tells Eddie about his sister, how she cared for him growing up, how she went away with her asshole of a boyfriend – now her deceased asshole of a husband – leaving him to fend for himself. He talks about travelling the country, trying every odd job he could get his hands on, until a buddy of his suggested he join the Navy. And he loves the work, he really does, but he hasn’t seen his sister in over a year. Their last conversation ended in a fight about some family secret that Buck is reluctant to talk about. Even Eddie can tell that the man just misses his sister. No matter what the argument was about.

Eddie finds himself talking – in less detail – about Shannon and the divorce and his son at home. At Buck’s prompting, he shows off his favourite photos of Christopher (avoiding the one burning a whole in his shirt pocket, torn and bloody, which never leaves him). The man’s face positively lights up when he sees the kid, offering an appropriate amount of sympathy for his divorce without pushing him for more emotions.

It’s easy talking to Buck, he realizes after a few hours. Because suddenly, the venue rental is nearly up and he’s still sitting at the corner of the bar, talking to Buck. Sure, a few people have passed by and shaken their hands, thanking them for their service – Eddie cringes every time and Buck has to hide his laughter once he realizes – but for the most part, it’s just the two of them, sitting and talking.

“The flag signalling we use now was established in 1855.” Buck explains as he leans further into Eddie’s space. “And while Robert Morse invented Morse Code in the 1830s, the International Morse Code that we use didn’t come out until the 1850s.”

“How do you know all of that?” Eddie was fairly certain he hadn’t had to study the history of communication when he was in training. But he’d also been very focused on his medical textbook.

Buck was incredibly cute when he blushed, Eddie decides – though he opts to keep that opinion to himself for now. “I get bored and I read.” The man shrugs nonchalantly, as though he hasn’t been entertaining Eddie with stories of Naval history and his own dumb-ass mistakes all evening. Honestly, Eddie wants to sit here all night and listen to Buck tell him stories of the world. It seems like he’s lived a lifetime already. And what has Eddie done? Gotten a girl pregnant, joined the army, gotten shot, and now he doesn’t even have a wife to go home to.

“Can I ask you something?” Eddie realizes too late that Buck looks nervous. He thinks he probably wouldn’t have said yes if he’d noticed. “How did you get your medal?”

Now he knows he doesn’t have to answer – and his initial instinct is to close out his tab and see if he can run to El Paso on his still-injured leg. But he also realizes that he hasn’t told anyone since it happened. Not the full story. Even now, he might not have the words. But he tries.

“Our helicopter got shot down while transporting wounded. I could still move so I got everyone out. Or I tried to get them out.” The echo of gunfire is not as distant as the others told him it would be. He can still smell it. “Support finally arrived and they decided to give me a medal for holding down the fort.”

Buck places a gentle hand over his and Eddie gasps, reminded that it has been a very long time since anyone has touched him. God, how he misses it.

“You saved wounded soldiers in the middle of the desert while being fired on. And you think you were just doing your job?”

“I’m an army medic.” He reasons with the bottom of his glass. “It’s my job to save people.”

“Maybe. But I don’t think that’s why you do it.” Without elaborating, Buck smiles at him and Eddie forgets the question.

“What about you?” He asks instead. “What’s yours for?”

Unlike the enthusiastic, bubbly personality he’s been talking to for the last few hours, Buck melts into the face he saw up on that stage. The stoic, professional.

“We were on our way back from an escort mission when we encountered some rough seas. I happened to be on deck with the chief mate when he had a stroke. I tried to tend to him but the storm was getting worse and no one could find the captain, so I just took over navigation. It was rough, I had no idea what I was doing, but we all made it out safely and the chief mate was okay.” As Buck shrugs, memories of an overheard conversation come flooding back to Eddie’s mind.

“Wait, were you on the USS Angelo?”

“Yeah. Why?”

Eddie can’t believe it. He has to laugh. “You were the cadet who sailed out of Hurricane Ida?”

“I am a petty officer first class, I’ll have you know.”

“Buck, you navigated a 2,000 ton ship out of a hurricane and all they gave you was a lousy medal?”

“I should get that printed on a t-shirt, or something.”

“That was incredibly reckless but also incredibly brave. Buck, you’re a hero.”

“I was just doing my job.” The smirk tells Eddie he knows exactly what he’s doing but it still hits him that he’s throwing Eddie’s words back in his face. Cute and cheeky.

He doesn’t know why he asks – well, he does, but it’s incredibly stupid and impulsive, and he definitely can’t blame it on the alcohol but he sure would like to.

“How long are you in town?”

Buck looks pleasantly surprised by his question but answers with regret in his eyes. “I head out with the Fifth Fleet in the morning.”

Wow. “You just got a medal, and you’re headed out to earn another one?”

“Something like that.” Buck laughs and Eddie wishes he was braver than he felt. “But I won’t be gone forever. And I’m really good at telegraphy if you wanted to send anyone a message.”

He’s so grateful that Buck has the good sense to be everything he needs right now. Because asking the next question is easier with someone standing next to him. “I suppose I’ll need a way to get in touch with you, then.”

Buck winks and Eddie has never been gladder that the concept of ‘standing’ was only metaphorical. The man should not be so irresistible after only a few hours, but Eddie can’t help but watch him push off his barstool and walk around the side of the bar.

“Hey, Diaz!” The spell is broken long enough for him to look across the room at where his name is being called. He waves at old friends – well, Senior Airman Han and Space Force First Sergeant Wilson are the closest things he has to old friends but in actuality, he’s not sure he knows their first names. “We’re going to the afterparty, want to join?”

On a normal night, Eddie would decline on the basis that he doesn’t want to go, and would rather lay in bed and watch reruns of ‘Murder She Wrote’. Tonight, Eddie wants to decline on the basis that he doesn’t want to go, and would rather stay up all night talking to someone who makes me feel curious about the future.

“Not tonight.” He shouts back across the room. “I’ll catch you at the next ceremony.”

They wave him off because they know it’s the same excuse he makes every single time but the only thing that matters is getting back to Buck.

“So.” He turns to the bar only to find it empty. The seat beside him is also unoccupied, as is any of the space surrounding him.

Had he dreamed up Buck? Had he been imagining this person who made him feel like divorce wasn’t his last chance at happiness? Was he truly so desperate and lonely?

“Hey.” Eddie looks up with too much hope in his eyes to only come face-to-face with the bartender. “He left this for you.” The man – who is not Buck, no matter how much Eddie hopes to see those eyes again – slides a napkin across the counter and walks away before Eddie can ask anymore questions.

He picks up the napkin and reads the blue ink-stained note written in messy scrawl.

Kilo

--... .---- --... ..... ..... ..... -.... --... ----. .----

The dots and dashes he recognizes as a series of numbers – a phone number, he hopes – but the word above? He tries to recall his academy days.

Kilo. Short for Kilogram. Used in the International Code of Symbols to represent the letter ‘K’. In Maritime Signal Flags, it indicates: I wish to communicate with you.

He’s pretty sure the bartender hates him for how late he stayed and how loudly he laughed at Buck’s note, but he can’t bring himself to care. Instead, he spends his energy memorizing the napkin’s contents long after he’s input the number. It’s more than just a piece of paper: it’s hope.

#military au #911 on fox #911 fox #buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie fic #911 fic #first meeting #cj answers things #florenceandthemachine #cj writes things #love flo

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thirstyforred · 3 years

Text

Wiedźmin: Gra Wyobraźni - Timeline

ok, so it's my rough and fast translation from polish. this text comes from the rpg book from 2001 and since then cdpr and netflix made their own so it's really kinda 'pick and choose' what you like - ciri has like four different birth years between the saga, this, games, and twn, as far as I know the timeline is only an illusion

TIMELINE

This timeline is based on humans' count of time and features mainly events related to the history of humanity

It's noted that no one really knows what event is supposed to be marked as the year 0. One of the theories is that humans moved the beginning of their race further in the past so they don't seem so young for other races on the continent

Gra Wyobraźni is supposed to be played in the 1240s and 1250s, so before the Nilfgaardian Wars when Geralt and Jaskier simply traveled around the North

FAR PAST

Gnomes and dwarves settle on the Continent

Thousand years before humans, elves come on white ships and for a long time fight in wars with dwarves

Around 1000 before humans settled on the Continent the Conjunction of Spheres takes place - magic and monsters appear in the world. As well as humans, the refugees of another world that they destroyed after living there for 5 million years

circa 764

The First Landing, led by Jan Bekker

Jan Bekker and Giambattista test the children looking for potential future mages - this event is called Poznanie Wybrańców [Getting to know the Chosen Ones]. Selected children are transported to Mirthe, the first seat of mages. Among the Chosen Ones is Agnes of Glanville, the first sorceress

Bekker, Giambattista, and Goeffrey Monck, after talks with many rulers, announce the separation of magic from the state. This pack is called the Novigrad Union

Goeffrey Monck takes a group of talented children to Loc Muinne where they are taught by elven mages

c. 768

Marschal Raupenneck of Tretogor attack and kill elves of Loc Muinne and Est Haemlet. Aen Seidhe leave their cities, which later become such human cities as Novigrad, Oxenfurt, Wizima, Tretogor, Maribor, Cidaris, and Cintra

836

Creation of the First Chapter of Sorcerers and establishment of the Prawo [Law]. Members of Chapter: Herbert Stammelford, Aurora Henson, Ivo Richert, Agnes of Glanville, Goeffrey Monck, and Radmir of Tor Carnedd

Soon start a war in which everyone who didn't want to submit to the Chapter and the Law are killed

Klara Larissa Winter opens the magic academy in Aretuza

c. 964

First witchers start to appear

Radowid I the Great, king of Redania, presents his brother Trohden with Kovir. In the next 20 years, Kovir and Poviss win wars against neighbors and become economic power

c. 1064

Elf Aeliren, called the White Rose of Shaerrawedd, leads Aen Seidhe to the uprising against humans. The elder race fails and almost the entirety of elven youth dies. Retreating Aen Seidhe destroys their abandoned settlements, Shaerrawedd among them. After the bloodshed on both sides, people start to believe that nonhumans should try to peacefully coexist with humans

Seeking found for a war with Aedirn over the Valley of Flowers, king of Redania Radowid III Ryży [the Redhead] taxes Kovir. This leads him to conflict with Gedovius, king of Kovir, which ends with customs war and expedition of 4000 redanian soldiers. With Redanians works king Benda of Kaedwen, who sends his army to Caingorn. After a week of fights, what's left of aggressors retreats and Radowit and Benda negotiate peace in Lan Exeter - as a result of which the First Treaty of Exeter is concluded. Radowid retains the lifetime title of king of Kovir and Povis, Benda - of king Caingorn and Malleore. Gedovius however is still de facto in power

1143

Falka, daughter of the king of Redania, Vridank and half-elven noble from Kovir, is born

1144

Sorcerer Cregennan of Lod and elven sorceress Lara Dorren aep Shiadhal met and fell in love

Vridank sends away Falka's mother and marries Cerro

Cregenna is killed and Lara Dorren dies in winter after giving birth to their daughter. The child is found and adopted by Cerro, queen of Redania, who names her Riannon

1163

Falka's Rebellion. At first, the uprising is supported by temerian and kovirian nobles as they see it as a fight of a firstborn heiress for her throne. Soon however the rebellion turns into the peasants' war. Falka burns Mirthe, and kills Vridank and Cerro

Pregnant Riannon, now wife of Goidemar, king of Temeria, is kidnapped by Falka's soldiers and locked in castle Houtborg, where she loses her mind. There - at the same time - are born, daughter of Falka and Riannon's twins

After suppressing the rebellion and burning Falka on stakes, Goidemar captures castle Houtborg and releases his wife. It's unknown which of the three newborns is Falka's so he takes in all of them

1164

Goidemar commissions sorcerers to discover the child of Falka. Those mages are - Tissai de Vries, Augusta Wagner, Liticia Charbonneau and Hen Gedymeith. Later joins them elven sorceress Enid an Gleanna. Goidemar at first wishes to execute the child, but as he's good at heart, his anger eventually fades. And with mages acting as they don't know which one it is, it's all forgotten

1165

Elves are pushed out of Dol Blathanna, the Valley of Flowers

1166

During the Belletey Yennefer is born

Visenna and Korin met

1167

Geralt of Rivia is born

1181

Adela, considered daughter of Goidemar, in fact Falka's child, dies during the epidemic of plague

1182

Son of Goidemar, Amavet, has an affair with countess Anna Kamena and dies killed by henchmen of her husband

Riannon, saddened by the death of her children, dies

Goidemar marries his daughter Fiona with Coram of Cintra

1183

Anna Kamena gives birth to Amavet's twins - boy Crispin and girl Muriel, later known as Piękna Łotrzyca [Lovely Harlot]

Fiona gives birth to Corbet of Cintra

1200

Muriel marries Robert, count of Garramone

Corbet marries Elen of Kaedwen

1202

Muriel gives birth to Adalia called the Seer, later duchess of Maribor

Dagorad, son of Corbert and Elen is born

1208

Esterad Thyssen, later king of Kovir, is born

1214

Vysogota of Corvo runs away from the Oxenfur Academy after publishing a heretical piece that could cost him his life.

1216

Djikstra is born

1218

Daughter of Dagorad and Adalia, Calanthe of Cintra is born

Geralt visits Blaviken and earns his monicker

Esteril Thyssen, the grandfather of Esterad, signs a treaty with the emperor of Nilfgaard, Fergus var Emreis. This treaty forbids Kovir from offering any help to enemies of the empire

1224

Jaskier is born

Vysogota makes a carrier in Nilfgaard, becomes a lecturer of ethics at Imperial Academy in Castel Graupin

Vifuril, father of Demawend, wins in the battle of Hagge with Medella, father of Foltest. This strengthens his rule of the Pontar Valley and cements the borders between Aedirn and Temeria

1234

Calanthe marries Roegnar of Ebbing and gives birth to Pavetta. Roegnar is wounded during the hunt in Erlewanld and a mysterious stranger saves his life. Stranger invokes the Law of Suprise

Vysotoga publishes one of his works and is sent to the dungeon. Emperor Torres (predecessor of Emhyr) banishes him. Vysygota emigrates to Ebbing

Peter Evertsen the right hand of the new emperor, Emhyr

1238

Mixed marriages with non-humans are starting to be condemned

1239

Peter Evertsen becomes wielki komorzy cesarstwa (sort of chamberlain)

Nilfgaard takes over Ebbing starting the Great Northern Wars

Jaskier starts studing in Oxenfurt

1242

Adda, daughter of Foltest and his sister, becomes a striga

Temeria fight Vizimir of Novigrad

Jaskier gets his diploma and for a year gives lectures in the Faculty of Trouvereship and Poetry. At age of 19, influenced by his love for countess de Stael, he becomes a poet

1244

Geralt and Jaskier meet each other during a festival in Guleta. From there they travel to the Valley of Flowers

In Redania, near Rinde, Jaskier gets attacked by djin. Geralt meets Yennefer and falls in love with her. They live together in Vengerberg for a year, and then they split

1245

Coup in Poviss - king Rhyd is killed and in his place, the family of Thyssenids starts ruling

Geralt and Jaskier visit Novigrad, where they meet doppler Tellico Lungrevinka Letorte

1248

Niedamir becomes child-king of Caingorn, he plans to take over neighbor Melleore

Geralt and Yennefer meet again during Niedamir's expedition for the dragon

Geralt comes to Vizima and lifts the curse from Adda, Foltest's daughter. He heals in Ellander and then travels to Bremervoord where he meets Essi Daven

Pavetta marries Duny, the Hedhog of Erlenwald

Calanthe marries Eist Tuirseach from Skellige

1249

During Belleteyn Pavetta gives birth to Ciri

1254

Duny and Pavetta die in a shipwreck

1255

Geralt visits Cintra to see his Child of Suprise, he leaves without it

1260

Geralt travels to Brokilon where he meets Ciri

1261

Attack on Cintra starts the First Nilfgaardian War, which ends with imperial loss during the Second Battle of Sodden

#the witcher #witcher lore

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lokixreader · 4 years

Text

Just a simple maid (soulmate au)

Requested:

Yes

Words:

4,044

Summary:

Y/n, an Asgardian maid, seems to be the soulmate of prince Loki, and for some reason she always wears long sleeves.

Warnings:

A lot of crying, sleep deprivation, ANGST, panic attack (kinda), sadness, tears, some more crying and a lot of bad writing

A/n: alright first soulamate fanfic, let’s hope for the best

A/a/n: finally I’m back, but only shortly. I recently redound some inspiration and will to write and to try being present on my blog again. But now I must warn you. I wrote this in the span of 2 years more or less, and for how impossible it might seem, I lived a lot of things in 2 years. This has been specifically written in 3 different periods of my life which would be a few months before, during and a few months after my depression. I hope you will enjoy it, and to everyone that is going through what I have, please I beg you, be strong. Carry yourself and keep going. Even if it hurts. Talk to someone about it. Someone who will understand and not treat you as attention seekers. Remember that you are loved, that even if you don’t have anyone now, life works in unexpected ways, and that maybe tomorrow you will find those people or that person that is willing to love you, perhaps not romantically, but trust me, aromantical love is the best. You will get through it. It doesn’t matter how hard it gets. You’ll get better. You will be better. You deserve it. And you are not alone❤️.

As a maid, you have never imagined yourself in a higher rang then where you already were and never expected something more. Children often imagined themselves being a lot more then what they were, imagined being princes or princesses, kings and queens, gods and goddesses and so on, but not you. You only dreamed to be free. Free from everything and everyone. Being raised as a servant blocked your dreams. You never dreamed what the other kids did, you didn’t want to be a goddess, you didn’t want to be a queen or a princess, all you ever wanted was freedom. Something that you never tasted since you turned 19. Exactly. 19 was the official age when a girl born from a servant became one as well.

Your mother was a wonderful and loving person, the best person in all of Asgard. She was the queen’s servant and Queen Frigga, being the sweet and kind person she was, often left you to play with her sons, Prince Thor and Loki, giving you the possibility to grow up with them too, and so you did. You were practically the same age as Loki, who soon became your best friend. Strangely, like probably not all of the royalty would do, he never treated you as a servant, but as a friend, and Thor did the same, leaving the servant-treatment aside. Time passed fast leaving child you, child Thor and child Loki behind and welcoming yourselves as adults. When you turned 19 and became a servant, for how much Thor and Loki claimed to care for you, they couldn’t do anything to solve your situation, those were the rules and the laws of Asgard and breaking them would have meant for them to go against the throne that one day one of them would have sat on. However, you couldn’t blame them, and you did the only thing that remained: you dealt with it. You were a maid. You couldn’t change it. You simply decided to keep it that way. But then again, when you turned 500, after centuries of service, you finally found a joy. In fact, when an Asgardian turns to the age of 5 centuries, they get strange writings on their arms, because of soulmates, as you once read on a book. When you started having writings on your arm, you went directly to your mother, who explained what a soulmate was and how it worked, better than any book could.”Y/n, darling, a soulmate, as the name already explains, it's a person whom you share a close relationship and a deep understanding. It's someone made to love you, that destiny decided you would be in love with. You can't hate them nor not love them, it’s a deep connection that can't be broken ” she explained to you, and you asked curiously ”What are these writings on my skin? How can I find this person?” and you kept making questions ”This writings are something that your soulmate wrote on his own skin to contact you. In fact, this is the only way you can find your loved one. You are lucky. Some people, unfortunately, never find their soulmates”. That night you received another writing on your arm, and you didn't hesitate to answer.

Only that, nothing too special, but you still responded

Hey

Nothing too special either

What are you doing?

Compared on your arm and you answered

Just talking to you, nothing much, you?

And he answered, and you two kept talking for longer than 3 hours. When you realised how late it was you wrote:

Oh, it is so late! We should go to sleep!

Even if you didn’t want to leave.

Wait! Do you think that we could meet tomorrow?

You suddenly found on your arm.

Tell me your name and I will find you

You wrote back, even if you weren’t sure that you could have, due to all the work you had to do tomorrow. But then reality hit you harder than ever.

I am Loki Odinson.

Oh great gods, oh great gods! Loki Odinson, Loki, that Loki, practically your best friend since childhood!

From that moment you stopped writing and since that night you promised yourself to avoid Loki, for how much you could, due to the fact that you were one of his maids.When you dressed up in the morning you chose a long-sleeve dress, in order to hide the writings on your arm and, without even thinking about meeting him, you cleaned his chambers only when he left them.This is what you did for almost a month, but it couldn't last forever, and you knew it. What hurt you the most was shutting Loki out, he was your best friend, always there for you, and now you just let him out, but obviously, he kept writing on his arm to talk to you, to see if he was the one that did something to you. He kept on writing and writing until your arm didn't start to hurt. It started to hurt every time he wrote something, every word, every letter, getting worse and worse, but you couldn't ask anyone for help, not even your mother, because you couldn’t risk her knowing that your soulmate was Loki. Again, you did the only thing that you could do, you dealt with it. When you found the time, you went to the library to find any reason why the writings caused you pain and any way to stop it. Today was one of those days when you had the time to go to the library. The library was a huge room, full of shelves and departments, with millions of books of every genre. You went to the section where you found the books on soulmates when you were younger. You had been searching for it the whole day and you didn't find it. You could see from the huge window that it was getting dark outside and that you should have gone to your room, so you decided to leave. The following morning you got up with a stringing pain in your left arm. Again. Loki had probably been writing on his arm for most of the night. He often did that, without thinking that it hurt you, or maybe he just didn’t know. Then you looked at your arm, not surprised in finding many questions such as “What are you doing?” “Where are you?” or even “Who are you?”. You didn’t answer any of those, you didn’t want to, you simply couldn’t, so you just got out of your bed and dressed with a long-sleeve dress, as always. Then, you got to Loki’s chambers, when he left them of course. He wasn’t a messy person, in fact he was quite the opposite, even if sometimes it might happen that he left his bed un-maked, mostly because he was late for something or he had something to attend to. You started making his bed, and picking up a pillow which probably fell while he was sleeping, you found a book. You weren’t surprised, Loki loved reading just as much as you did, and it came to you without a surprise that he read in bed before sleeping, or even for the whole night. But what surprised you was what the book was about. On the brown cover, in a beautiful golden writing there was written ‘Soulmates: the lifetime bondage’. This was te book you were searching for the last day! And it was in Loki’s room, but why did he have it? The answer suddenly popped in your mind: you weren’t answering him when he wrote to you, so he was probably searching for the reason why. Opening the book and going through its pages, you saw a few notes here and there, till you didn’t reach the chapter about ‘not answering soulmates’ and you started reading carefully.

“Not answering soulmates:

When a soulmate does not answer to the question the other soulmate wrote on his arm, there are more reasons why it happens:

- The soulmate does not answer because of its own will

- The soulmate might not be capable of answering

- The soulmate might be dead”

The last part made your heart drop. Did Loki think of you as dead? No, he couldn’t, you were right there, alive and well! But he didn’t know, you never talked to him. You rolled up your sleeves, looking at all the questions he wrote, between them there were some “Are you alright?” or “Are you safe?” and similar. Tears started appearing in your eyes, one already falling on your cheek: you didn’t realise you started crying.“So you found the book” a voice said behind you. You rolled down your sleeve, got up from the floor you were sitting on and took in all of his form, recognising it as the younger prince of Asgard. “L-loki, I was not expecting you here!” You said. “I know, I had a very important meeting, which I actually did not have to attend” God his accent, you had really missed his voice. “Anyway, how come that I have not seen you in a while?” He asked “I..I have been busy..” you lied. He smirked. “Y/n-“ “I know, I know you are the god of lies and you know that I lied” you stopped him in the middle of his sentence “I was about to say that I know you since we were children, it is impossible for me not to know” of course you thought “So, what is this truly about?” you had to tell him the truth, but you couldn’t, not this way “I am just having problems with my soulmate” you said. Half truth and half lie, or better only truth and an omission. ”That is interesting, I am too” You were surely surprised that he said so “Oh, really, why, what is happening with them?” You tried to pass the topic on him rather than on you “I think you do already know by reading the book you are holding” he said. You looked down at your hands, finding the book “I am sorry, Loki. But do you know why they are not answering?” You tried to get the informations by directly asking him. “Unfortunately, I do not, but I do have an idea” you but your lip “Do you believe that they are dead?” He sighted “They might be..” he said without daring to look into your eyes. You felt so bad for avoiding him and leaving him without telling him anything. “Oh, Loki” you sighted and gave him a hug. He was startled after feeling your arms around him but then he gave in an hugged you back “I missed you” he said, burying his face in your hair. “I missed you too” you said back. When he stopped hugging you, you stepped back and tucked a stand of your hair behind your ear “Now if you excuse me, I think I should change your bed sheets” you said to him “Yes, of course” he agreed. You started packing the sheets so you could take them more easily and started heading for the door when Loki asked “You know that it is June, don’t you?” You slowly turned around and gave him a questioning glare “Isn’t it too hot to wear long sleeves?” He said. What am I going to say now? You asked yourself “I just liked the dress” you justified, immediately leaving the room, not noticing the smirking god. That was close. The days passed and you couldn’t help but being sorry for Loki. Sometimes you could see him wandering in the corridors near his chamber, with the book in his hand, a pen in the other, a rolled up sleeve and, to conclude his look, two deep bags under his eyes: to say that he was visibly tired was a misunderstanding. He was completely sleep-deprived. This situation was getting out of control and seeing him like this made your heart feel only pain and pity for the younger prince. This, till the day you finally had enough and decided to talk with him.

You knocked on his camber door, putting so much effort in such a small gesture. When you received no answer was the moment you started questioning yourself, but gathering all the courage you still had in yourself you entered, despite him not telling you to do so. Then you saw him. You saw him and you felt full of emotions: sorrow and regret were the first ones, then joined by happiness and joy for finding your best friend again.He was on the balcony, reading, a concentrated expression on his face, probably not even noticing you entered the room due to the lack of sleep. Or probably he had, but couldn’t bring himself to care in that moment. “L-Loki?” you quietly spoke his name, getting his attention... “Mmh?”.... more or less...“Loki?” you called for him again. When you didn’t get his full attention, you brought his face to you, locking your e/c eyes with his green ones. In doing this you could see his tiredness and sleep deprivation, the way his eyes had lost the sparkle they once had.“Loki, look at you! What have they done?” You asked him genuinely worried “I can’t find them, they won’t answer me! What have I done? What has happened to them!?” Loki yelled, tears picking at his eyes. You couldn’t do anything to him, so you hugged him, holding him to yourself in attempt to comfort him. He then let himself go, sinking in your embrace and crying, crying on your shoulder. When he finished you wiped away his tears, looking in his eyes “What is wrong with me?” He suddenly asked you.“There is nothing wrong with you, Loki, you are perfect. You are not the problem, it is them, they do not know what they are missing, and if they really do not want to be with you, then move on and let them see your true greatness” you said with a small smile forming on your lips, making a similar one appear on his face. His eyes were looking into yours, like trying to get to your soul. “Now, you need to get ready, there is a ball tonight you need to attend to” you said, looking down to the ground to avoid his gaze. “Come with me” he said “What?” You were shocked, did you actually hear well? “You understood, come with me” “I-should not, I-I mean, I am not important like the people that will be in the ballroom, and not even at your level to actually come with you” you stuttered “Oh, you got me wrong darling, you will not decide, this is an order, and please do not underestimate yourself like this” . That was... shocking to say the least. Not less then three second ago he was crying on your shoulder, and then he was giving you orders? Well, it was something he could do, but still, he never did.

You went to your room to get ready for the ball. What could you wear? You were a mere servant, you didn’t have a dress for such an occasion. But then, when you opened your dresser, you saw something that didn’t belong there: it was a beautiful long f/c dress. You took it to examine it and you saw all the diamonds it had on it. You were speechless, where did this dress come from? A little light turned on in your mind: Loki. Of course, who else could have invited you knowing that you didn’t have a dress for the occasion, just to give you a new beautiful one? There was only one last problem: the dress didn’t have sleeves. And now? What could you do? Make up on the arm? No it would be too much. Gloves maybe? Probably the best option.

After finishing getting ready you looked at yourself in the mirror. You felt beautiful, the dress looked perfect on you, the slight make up you put was perfect, and the gloves you found were perfect. Everything seemed perfect. You got out of your room, closing the door behind you and when you turned you found yourself face to face with the God of mischief.He looked at you, mouth slightly open, gazing at you from your feet to the tip of your head. “Is something wrong?” You asked, thinking that you had something out of place “No, you look ravishing”. You whispered a small ‘Thank you’ while blushing madly.

When you arrived at the ball room, you started feeling insecure. You were just a maid, a mere servant, and behind those doors were important people, princes and princesses, probably even kings and queens. Loki seemed to recognise your insecurity, since you felt him take your hand in his and lightly squeeze it. Now you could see why the destiny put him as your soulmate. That small gesture made you feel better, a bit more confident. You two then decided to enter the room.The night seemed to go well, and by well you meant that no one of the royalty approached you, except for Thor of course, who had come just to see you, since it has been a long time from the day you had last seen the blond prince. He started talking to you only when Loki had left your side “Hello, Y/n “ he began “Greetings, Prince Thor” you said back. He then chuckled, making you laugh; you had always greeted him like this as a child, a small obligation from your mother, who wasn’t used to you being friends with the princes. You then went on talking about the past months and what you had been doing, including the reasons why you couldn’t spend your time together.

“Alright, say that one more time.”

“Thor, I have already told you three times” you complained.

“I just need to understand why you have not told him yet” he insisted “How can you not understand? Loki is a prince, a god, and one of the most perfect people to ever exist, how could I ever stand next to him. I am nobody compared to him, Thor. I am just... just a simple maid” you explained, pain almost visible on your lowered face, you were feeling miserable just thinking about it, about your unimportance and how at times it made your life a living Hel. You were taken back to reality and away from your thoughts by a hand being put on your shoulder. You looked up to see an understanding sad smile plastered on Thor’s face “You forgot to mention the most important thing: he is your friend” he gently spoke, emphasising the last four words. “He has been your friend for longer than I have, he has spent almost his whole life with you and has always cared about you deeply. It shouldn’t be so surprising that you two are meant to love each other, but still, you keep saying that it should not be like that, just because you are a simple maid. Well, you might be a maid, but you are everything but simple. You are one of the most amazing people I have ever met. You are intelligent, funny, curious and beautiful. And top of that, you are you, and have never been afraid of who you are. For all these reasons, I can say today that I am happy and proud of having you in my life, and I am certain that my brother feels the exact same way”

By the end of his surprising speech, you found yourself on the verge of tears. You had always been in the dark about them caring so much for you and had never thought that someone could see you in that way. The blonde prince then hugged you tightly, noticing some of those small tears fall down your cheeks

“Do you want to know a small secret?” He asked you and you nodded still hugging him, then he silently said “When you had to become a maid, you should have been my servant, but Loki insisted so that you could be his” your eyes widened. Loki wanted you...as his maid? “He was convinced that since you should have cleaned his room, which isn not usually messy or dirty, you could have more time for yourself and that he would have been able to see you everyday at least once” You abandoned Thor’s hug to look at him in disbelief. He moved his hand to brush away on of your tears “ He loves you” Thor said, so faintly and silently that you wouldn’t have heard him if you were just one more step away. That last sentence hit you hard. Everything Thor said hit you hard. The room which wasn’t so crowded immediately started to feel smaller and smaller. Your lungs seemed non-existent and your breathing increased. You quickly excused yourself before running away towards the balcony.

The outside fresh air seemed to calm you down, and to fill your new redound lungs. You were feeling normal again, up until you didn’t hear a well too known voice. “Are you alright? I came back to my brother only to hear that you run away here” his voice was like the one of an angel, beautiful and spectacular, but at the current moment it was slightly panicking you. But then you took a deep breath and exhaled. In the meantime Loki came closer to the railing where you were at and looked at you worryingly. After a few seconds of mere loud breathing, you finally spoke up “I know why your soulmate is not answering Loki” he looked at you with a confused face “We do not have to talk about them, it is about you I am worried now. Forget them and tell me what is wrong. I want to be sure that YOU are alright Y/n, not them” you looked away from him and broke into a small laugh.

Ah the irony.

And if Loki was confused before, now it was even worse. You looked back at Jim’s sad face , then you slowly took off one of your gloves. Loki’s expression changed from confused, to shocked, to surprised and finally to one you could quite muster, something between realisation and sadness. He gulped, closing his wonderful eyes, only to open them Almere moments later “Why.” Was the only thing he said. A cold expression hard to read or to understand. “I was afraid” you answered, tears already forming. “Scared? Scared of what?” He asked slightly furring his eyebrows “That you would have rejected me and abandoned me. I was afraid of not being enough for you or that-“ you didn’t finish your answer. Tears were falling on your cheeks without a care, but you were engulfed in a hug “I would never leave you, for no reason at all. I’ll always be with you.” You hugged him back, scared that the world might end if you even dared to let go.

Minutes went by, but both of you couldn’t care less of the time passing, you just stayed like that, in each others arms, after so much time divided. Loki then kissed your temple. “I wish I told you sooner” you apologised looking to the floor. His index finger lifted up your chin so that he could see your features “Me too” was what he said “but this does not matter, for we are finally together now” you smiled at him happily. He could have reacted in million different ways. He could have told you how much time he spent trying to contact you, how he suffered without you, how his best friend leaving him could have affected him. But not a word. Not even a mention. He was just genuinely happy that you were alright and that he had his soulmate in front of him. *how could I have been so blind to this* he kept asking himself, looking at the e/c pearls staring at him.

Unbeknownst to you both, a certain blond prince watched them together, kissing each other fondly, then observed them get back in hand in hand, finally happy.

Tag List

(I’m just going to start a new one so that I don’t bother people who don’t care about this kinda stuff anymore) if you want to be added just tell me anywhere <3

@volpenera0 & @casseythebee & @brightsunanddarkmidnight2-0 & @melodynoelle & @just-the-hiddles & @arch-venus25 & @marvelgirlonamarvelworld & @fanfictrashdump

#loki #loki (marvel)#loki friggason #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki fiction #loki god of mischief #loki x reader #loki reader insert #reader insert #sadnees #writers tears #im so happy #happy ending

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hwrryscherry · 4 years

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hi i was just wondering what model!y/n's response to this

fist of all I wanna say that this gotta be one of the most ridiculous videos I’ve ever seen. Fox News should be ashamed of this. And second, model Y/N is the type of person that you can say whatever you want about her in the internet but you have to be careful when talking about the people she loves and when it comes to Harry, she can’t be silent. And honestly, it’s so ridiculous that she can’t be silent. But Model Y/N is not the type of person that downgrades herself and loses her patience.

She would definetely tweet about it and she would stand up for her man. If she wasn’t super calm on that moment she wouldn’t have a lot of patience and she’d just say a ‘’It’s embarrassing to know that they’re talking about this while the world is on a crises’’ but if she was calm she’d say this:

*IT CAN BE TRIGGERING TO SOME PEOPLE. DON'T READ IT IF YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE*

It’s extremely heartbreaking and embarrassing to hear that Fox News is really using its live time to try to downgrade Harry Styles and his choice of clothes on the cover of Vogue as we are living in a period where about 1.8 million people have already died from covid-19 and more than 82 million cases have been reported worldwide. Also, Nashville just suffered a bomb attack, the world stands up fighting racism which sadly, still remains present in the toxic society we live in. The LGBTQ+ community continues to be disrespected and cruelly murdered by small-minded people. Xenophobia is still implanted by many. People are still starving. Children are still sexualized. Some disgusting people still consider themselves entitled to sexually abuse another human being. We still have cases of domestic violence. We still have women who are cruelly murdered every day. We’re living a climatic crisis where we cannot even say with 100% certainty that the world we know will be whole in 50 years from now and I don't know about you, but I worry a lot about the world that I will leave for my future children. The Amazon Rainforest continues to be deforested, which harms the air we breathe and our climatic conditions. A major earthquake killed several people in Croatia. We have shootings in schools where the lives of children who are supposed to have a lifetime ahead of them are suddenly ended. Every day, more people suffer from anxiety, panic, depression, low self-esteem and eating disorders due to psychological pressure that are implanted by the media and society.

And believe me, I could go further and quote thousands of bigger problems that should be highlighted by Fox News. Thousands of more important and more serious matters than "Harry Styles is a man and men shouldn't wear women's clothes.". It's embarrassing. It’s extremely embarrassing to know that society still remains extremely trapped in the toxic masculinity that has been implanted for centuries.

Wearing a dress, makeup, nail polish or any other feminine product does not make any man inferior to any other man and honestly, we are in 2020. We’re living in a period where we’re fighting to break the stereotypes of genres. And honestly I thought we already had overcome the "Bring back manly men’’ situation.

I really hope that Fox News understands the relevance of what should really be talked to the public and that the next time they come to talk about men wearing women's clothing, it’s to exalt the breaking of stereotypes.

In fact, I really love the pearls he wears and I even feel a little offended because the pearls he used at Vogue were a gift from me. And I've been told that my taste in accessories is extraordinary.

#harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry and y/n #harry styles and y/n #harry x reader #HARRYxMODELY/N

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crowdvscritic · 3 years

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best picture project // THE ‘40s: WARTIME + PRESTIGE

In the immortal words of Don McLean, a long, long time ago, I can still remember how I wrote about the 1930s for my Best Picture Project. (Don’t fact check those lyrics to “American Pie.”) I titled that overview of the decade “Chaos + Influence” in that order—chaos led the Academy’s way through the Great Depression. In the 1940s, though, the motion picture community embraced the organization, and in many cases, it was because they realized how helpful it could be to their own reputations and pocketbooks.

At the ceremony honoring 1940, Jimmy Stewart was the only Best Actor nominee to show up, and Katharine Hepburn said on losing for her work in The Philadelphia Story, “Prizes are nothing. My prize is my work.” By 1943, the Golden Globes launched as a copycat show, and by 1945, Joan Crawford was campaigning to win for Mildred Pierce. Henry Rogers, who ran her campaign, said, “You know as well as I do that members of the Academy vote emotionally…I’m confident that people in our business can be influenced by what they read and what they hear.” He’s on record calling acting awards “more of a popularity contest than a talent contest” with “emotional and sometimes practical considerations, none of which have to do with the quality of the performance.” Studios began taking out ads for nominees they had under contract (even if they were nominated for pictures from other studios), and formal betting began in Las Vegas on odds-on favorites.

When Joan Fontaine defeated her sister Olivia de Havilland for Best Actress 1941, her salary didn’t see a change, but her studio, Selznick International, did. The fee for other studios to borrow her talents bumped from $25,000 to $100,000 after her 1940 nomination and to $200,000 after her 1941 win. Never mind that Fontaine had mixed feelings after her win. “Winning an Academy Award is undoubtedly a great accolade, supreme praise from one’s peers, a recognition to be accepted gratefully and graciously,” she said. “It can also damage irreparably one’s relations with family, friends, co-workers, the press…It was a fishbowl existence until the next year’s awards, when a new winner would occupy the throne. Naturally, there was many a doubter, many a detractor, many an ill-wisher. It’s an uneasy head that wears the crown.”

Still, success wasn’t a given for the industry during wartime, and the Oscars had to pivot like the rest of world. Statues were made of plaster for a time to prevent stealing metal from war efforts, and the 1942 ceremony was almost cancelled because of the U.S. had just jumped into World War II and Carole Lombard had just died in a plane crash while selling war bonds. But the show must go on, so the Academy pared the evening down, hosting a “dinner” instead of a “banquet” and discouraging fancy dress. The format of the show changed several times through the decade, eventually nixing the meal and moving to a theater for good. The Academy might invite soldiers for a variety-style evening, President Roosevelt might make an address, or Jack Benny might host a radio broadcast for soldiers abroad. Special awards were handed out for war-related service, including to Noel Coward for his war film In Which We Serve, the British Ministry of Information “for its vivid and dramatic presentation of the heroism of the RAF” in a documentary, and to Harold Russell “for bringing hope and courage to his fellow veterans” in The Best Years of Our Lives. (Russell also won Best Supporting Actor, making him the only person with two acting Oscars for the same film.) Also of note, Winston Churchill praised Best Picture winner Mrs. Miniver as “propaganda worth a hundred battleships,” an unusual but powerful endorsement of the voting body’s picks.

Wartime adjustments weren’t the only new features. The Academy saw more than one big first:

ABC began broadcasting the show on the radio

New categories were introduced, including for documentaries, foreign language films, and costume design

Ernst Lubitsch won the first Lifetime Achievement Oscar

The Academy started keeping winners secret until announced on stage

Barry Fitzgerald earned noms both for Best Actor and Best Supporting Actor in Going My Way—oops! A new rule was added to prevent that from happening again

Hamlet became the first non-American Best Picture win, overcoming attitudes like that of one studio exec who said noms for foreign films were “an act of treason.” (Heaven forbid we learn what that guy would think of Parasite!) The Academy had tried to prevent this with special awards for international films, but basically Laurence Olivier would not be denied (to oversimplify it)

And a few moments qualified as blink-and-you-might-miss-this-didn’t-happen-yesterday:

Fortune reported The Best Years of Our Lives and Gentleman’s Agreement made $2 million more at the box office than they would have if they had not won Best Picture

When How Green Was My Valley won Best Picture, some speculated it was due to recency bias as the last nominee to be released. Today that film is best remembered as the one that somehow won over Citizen Kane, so, um, its reputation has not aged any better

At least two winners, Michael Curtiz and Greer Garson, acknowledged they didn’t have speeches prepared. Garson’s 5½-minute speech pushed the party past 1 a.m., which Jack Black and Will Ferrell would have something to say about

Bottom line: The Academy started as a body with middling influence and transformed into a prestigious organization, not just strong enough to withstand a world war but perhaps even bolstered by it.

Photos:

1950: The Pantage Theater outside the Academy Awards honoring the films of 1949.

1942: Burgess Meredith watches Olivia de Havilland and Joan Fontaine in a happier (maybe?) moment the night Fontaine bested her sister for Best Actress. When de Havilland passed away last year, you might have seen stories about their rivalry resurface.

1947: Samuel Goldwyn, Harold Russell and William Wyler celebrate eight awards for The Best Years of Our Lives.

1942: Bob Hope hosts for his third time. He hosted or co-hosted the event 19 times between 1940 and 1978.

Resources:

Behind the Oscar: The Secret History of the Academy Awards by Anthony Holden (1993)

Oscars.org (including all photos)

“Oscar Hosts: Performers Who Have Hosted the Academy Awards,” GoldDerby.com (2020)

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hellowkatey · 4 years

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Febuwhump Day 19

Prompt: sleep deprivation

Warnings: graphic descriptions of torture, hallucinations

Read on AO3

Eyes Wide Shut

Panic rises in his throat as he stares at the shadows that creep up the wall. Obi-Wan flinches at flashes of light and dark, secretly hoping that they are some sort of hallucination.

Hallucinations would mean he would have an excuse to feel like the world is unraveling. Maybe the lack of sleep is finally clouding his mind enough for him to see what isn't there, or worse, a glimpse into what is beyond. He feels close enough to death to touch it, so why shouldn't he see it too?

He needs to rest. Shut his eyes and let his jail cell fade into darkness. But the analog clock hasn't moved in what feels like hours, but he knows it's only been seconds. In the rare moments when his captors aren't blaring horrible sounds that blew out his eardrums days ago, he still seems to be able to hear the damned clock. Tick, tick, ticking continuously until it makes him forget how many tick tick's he's counted and the tick tick tick longer hand is pointing at a new number. He doesn't remember that much time passing (tick tick tick tick), but such is life in captivity. Periods that feel long are actually a blink or two, and moments that he thinks he's finally found control again turn out to only be an illusion.

He lies on his side, knees tucked into his chest. Wiping away tears he doesn't remember shedding, he pretends he isn't alone. He has never told anyone, but some nights, he finds no sleep unless he imagines imaginary arms encompassing his body. A certain someone that makes his chest ache when he thinks about them too much tucked against his side and acting as his valiant protector from the horrors of the night. It's been a long time since he last shared a bed. As much as he knows he doesn't need it, he wants it because for once it would be nice to feel an ounce of comfort.

Because laying on the freezing, hard ground for any longer than a few minutes makes his body go numb. And even if he manages to muster enough strength to manifest the ghost of warm arms wrapping around his torso and a chin nestling into the crook of his neck, it fades before he has a chance to pretend he's anywhere else but locked in this prison.

He thinks he sees a flash of bright blue, or maybe green, and for a moment he thinks he's saved. But no, his mind has seemingly decided that his current torturers aren't doing a well enough job, so it dangled hope in front of his face for good measure. It's a trick of the mind. Another convincing piece of evidence that his heart pounding against his chest cavity and the pressure building in his veins aren't the only things manifesting in his sleeplessness.

Hallucinations would mean maybe he's finally cracking. Finally breaking under the pressure as many before have hoped to do to him. Obi-Wan has been through worse feats-- more pain, more bodily harm, but somehow this is a new circle of hell. Worse than a couple of days with no shut-eye. At least then he has battles or missions or other people to distract him from the exhaustion in his bones. But this... this is like a piece of Zigoola resurfacing from its hiding space in the depths of his mind.

(Sometimes if he's quiet enough he can hear the prayerful chant die Jedi, die Jedi die. Interestingly enough, he can't hear it now. Only the tick of the clock.)

Hallucinations would mean the lines between reality and whatever the hell else there is would blur completely.

Strangely, the prospect of such an existence is becoming more and more appealing.

Maybe in this augmented reality, he could finally find peace. For himself. For the galaxy. Never in his life has he wished so earnestly for a moment of quiet and stillness. Everything seems to be going wrong. The tides are turning and as much as the Republic likes to spout off about how they're the ones to come out on top, Obi-Wan has a feeling they're going to be the ones swept under the tidal wave.

(He has no evidence for this except for a lifetime of being told to trust his feelings.)

So how do you tell that to millions of soldiers created for the sole purpose of war? Or to the Jedi he fights alongside? The padawans who had to grow up too fast, and the Masters who have lost everyone in their lineage? Perhaps they're thinking it too-- he isn't so vain to assume he is the only one who cannot stand the sight of the Holonet anymore because none of it lines up with what actually happens on those battlefields. Or that he sees the way the civilians cower from both the Separatists and the Republic. Likewise, how they air their disdain with equal prejudice. They have to see it, right? The foundation crumbling beneath their feet? The chasm they walk a very thin tightrope across?

If he's lucky, all of this has been one big dream. One big escape from reality and he will wake up in the Jedi Temple with the smell of Qui-Gon's favorite tea brewing and a padawan braid hanging from behind his ear. Because Obi-Wan is pretty sure the last time the galaxy had some semblance of normalcy was before he was forced to cut Maul in half.

He stares at the shadows that claw across the ceiling, menacing and vile as they draw in the last drops of light. If the faces he sees staring back at him are only a hallucination, he will be satisfied. Because facing them for real is a feat he isn't ready for, so he closes his eyes as though that will keep the ghosts from following him.

And that's the problem with dreams, he thinks, I yield control to the wills of my mind, and I have no confidence it will be any less horrifying than the reality I currently live.

But the moment ends with what sounds like the scream of a dying krayt dragon being blasted into the room from all directions, and Obi-Wan jumps to his knees in surprise before toppling over once again. He covers his ears as though that will keep out the noise or the vibrations that shake every cell of his existence, curling back into the ball he just had himself in. If he separates from himself enough, goes to another place where the gray walls become mere blurs and the Force acts as static, the screaming of the krayt dragon becomes nothing but background noise. Enough to ignore the pain as the scars in his ears tear open and blood drips down his collar. Enough to hope that the next noise they play might be slightly more pleasant.

Maybe if they play one loud enough, he will go deaf completely, and then Obi-Wan will find some peace.

The cell is fourteen of his foot length across, and fourteen wide. He hasn't yet measured, but he suspects they're fourteen tall as well. Made entirely of reinforced durasteel with no clear door, he suspects they built the prison around him.

For the thousandth time since he awoke here, he screams into the Force: why?

On the third day, he received an answer: why not?

For some reason, this doesn't surprise him.

He sees the face of Qui-Gon, stoic yet kind-eyed. For a moment at least, and then his expression changes to wide eyes and deathly pale complexion.

"Promise me," he says. Obi-Wan doesn't need to hear the rest to know what he's promising. It's been a staple of his nightmares for years.

"Promise me," Satine says as he leaves his master lying on the ground. He looks up in horror.

"Promise what?"

"Promise me you will move on."

He swallows hard, reaching out for her slender face and bright eyes. "Move on from what, my darling?" But as he tries to cradle her cheek and feel her soft skin against his hand, she vanishes into thin air. "Move on from what?" he whispers.

And he is alone again.

If he really is seeing lightsabers floating through space and ghosts of people that he held in his arms as they passed and hearing the voices of the dark side lingering somewhere in the nearby shadows, then maybe this is his final spiral. He isn't even sure if anyone has noticed he's even gone yet. The worst part is he has no idea what the purpose of all of this.

Why?

They haven't asked him any questions, haven't tried to take anything from him. Just put him in this cell and decided to keep him awake.

Why not?

Sleep was never a natural state for Obi-Wan, but five days without a moment of unconsciousness is enough to drive anyone mad.

There is no end, there is only the Force. He reminds himself of this as he presses his fingers against the quickened pulse against his neck at the tempo of an upbeat cantina band. He's past the point of caring about the cold water they spray on him or the racket they blast through the speakers or the things that may or may not be real. Let them. I welcome it, now.

But a part of him still screams at him to fight. Oh, how he wants to silence the bugger, but it only makes another part of him speak up to remember his training and what he stands for. I've withstood worse, his mind reminds him. And yes, he has. But his life has been a continuous pursuit of one-upping his last mission injury or torture regiment and stars Obi-Wan is so tired.

What about Anakin?

Obi-Wan lets out a shaky breath.

Promise me, Obi-Wan...

Not even the voice of Qui-Gon comforts him anymore, and he buries his face in his hands.

It isn't even the hallucinations or the torture anymore. What is really wrong is that the galaxy is crumbling and the Force is on fire and he's choking on the smoke. Limbs pinned down by the screaming that's he's okay. I don't need help. Which is such a fucking lie because he can feel the life draining as quickly as time feels like it's passing. He can feel that darkness is coming and coming quickly. There is no way to stop it. No way to slow it. Like waiting for the whistle tone to drone out his next attempt to nap, all he can do is watch it as it arrives.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

But when he looks, the clock hand hasn't moved yet, and a part of him is happy another hour hasn't passed. And a part of him dreads the idea that maybe he'll be stuck in this moment forever.

__________

Anakin stands among a room full of dismembered bodies, his chest heaving with residual adrenaline from the fight. He wields not only his own weapon but his former Master's. All that was left behind when he disappeared. The clone troopers pour in moments later, unsurprised by the carnage. Anakin wastes no time in taking the two weapons and plunging them into the durasteel wall of the suspended prison.

He forms a circle large enough for two people to fit through, and he jumps into the tiny cell. The first thing that hits him is the smell. It's not of death, but of the moments before. They've arrived just in time it seems.

"Obi-Wan?" he says gently as his gaze falls on a crumbled figure tucked in the corner. His former master looks horrendous, dirty and bloody and deathly pale. When Anakin says his name his eyes raise slowly, and he is shocked to see the wild look in them.

"Anakin?" he rasps, his voice sounding raw. From the red rims around his eyes and the puffiness of his cheeks, it's obvious he's been crying. "No... it can't be." he whispers, and rolls into himself, turning toward the wall. Anakin is stunned. What the hell did they do to you, Master?

"No, Obi-Wan, it's really me," he says, kneeling down next to him and placing a hand on his wrist. When he touches his skin, Obi-Wan jumps as though he's seen a ghost. He looks at Anakin with wide eyes and mouth agape.

"Anakin?" he repeats, grabbing his hand and then his wrist and feeling the material of his tunic. "Anakin!" Before he can react, Obi-Wan has thrown himself into his arms. Anakin ignores the stench and hugs him tightly, relief washing through him to be near his former master again.

"I've got you, Master. I've got you."

Obi-Wan's head rests on his shoulder, holding the embrace long enough Anakin's body starts to cramp. When he pulls back, the Jedi Master's head bobs back, lightly snoring.

"Obi-Wan did you... did you fall asleep?"

"Sir," Rex's voice rings out as Anakin gently lays his master on his back until they can get a stretcher in here.

"What is it?"

Rex's helmet is off, and he looks at him with serious eyes. "They've been keeping him awake."

"The whole time?"

"I only skimmed through the footage but..."

Anakin looks back at him, sleeping soundly-- probably for the first time in 120 hours. His knuckles go white as he grips the hilt of his lightsaber.

"Have medical take him in. And by no means wake him up."

Rex nods and walks out of the doorway Anakin cut to call for Kix. Anakin stands from the ground, looking around the tiny cell. The only thing that stands out is a clock hanging on the wall, the old kind that they don't really make anymore. The kind with the hands. The ticking is obnoxiously loud, echoing off the unpadded walls of the cell.

He takes Obi-Wan's saber, ignites it, and swiftly slices the clock in half. It falls, but he catches it with the Force before it hits the ground.

The cell goes quiet, except for the quiet snores of Obi-Wan Kenobi.

#febuwhump #febuwhumpday19 #sleep deprivation #obi-wan kenobi #hallucinations #torture #anakin skywalker #this one got angsty #i actually started writing it at 3am #and decided to keep the ramblings #welcome to the inner workings of my insomnia mind

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1962dude420-blog · 3 years

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Today we remember the passing of James Garner who Died: July 19, 2014 in Los Angeles, California

Garner was born James Scott Bumgarner on April 7, 1928 in Denver, Oklahoma (now a part of Norman, Oklahoma). His parents were Weldon Warren Bumgarner, a widower, and Mildred Scott (Meek), who died five years after his birth. His older brothers were Jack Garner (1926–2011) and Charles Bumgarner (1924-1984), a school administrator. His family was Methodist. After their mother's death, Garner and his brothers were sent to live with relatives. Garner was reunited with his family in 1934, when Weldon remarried.

Garner's father remarried several times. Garner came to hate one of his stepmothers, Wilma, who beat all three boys (especially him). He said that his stepmother also punished him by forcing him to wear a dress in public. When he was 14 years old, he fought with her, knocking her down and choking her to keep her from killing him in retaliation. She left the family and never returned. His brother Jack later commented, "She was a damn no-good woman". Garner's last stepmother was Grace, whom he said he loved and called "Mama Grace", and felt that she was more of a mother to him than anyone else had been.

After the war, Garner joined his father in Los Angeles and enrolled at Hollywood High School, where he was voted the most popular student. A high school gym teacher recommended him for a job modeling Jantzen bathing suits. It paid well ($25 an hour), but in his first interview for the Archives of American Television, he said he hated modeling; he soon quit and returned to Norman. He played football and basketball at Norman High School, and competed on the track and golf teams. However, he dropped out in his senior year. In a 1976 Good Housekeeping magazine interview, he admitted, "I was a terrible student and I never actually graduated from high school, but I got my diploma in the Army."

Shortly after his father's marriage to Wilma broke up, his father moved to Los Angeles, leaving Garner and his brothers in Norman. After working at several jobs he disliked, Garner worked as a merchant mariner in the United States Merchant Marine at age 16 near the end of World War II. He liked the work and his shipmates, but he suffered from chronic seasickness.

Garner enlisted in the California Army National Guard, serving his first 7 months in California. He then went to Korea for 14 months, as a rifleman in the 5th Regimental Combat Team during the Korean War, then part of the 24th Infantry Division. He was wounded twice, first in the face and hand by shrapnel from a mortar round, and the second time in the buttocks from friendly fire from U.S. fighter jets as he dived into a foxhole. Garner received the Purple Heart in Korea for the first wound. He qualified for a second Purple Heart (eligibility requirement: "As the result of friendly fire while actively engaging the enemy"), but he did not actually receive it until 1983, 32 years after the event.

In 1954, Paul Gregory, a friend whom Garner had met while attending Hollywood High School, persuaded Garner to take a nonspeaking role in the Broadway production of The Caine Mutiny Court-Martial, where he was able to study Henry Fonda night after night. During the week of Garner's death, TCM broadcast most of his movies, introduced by Robert Osborne, who said that Fonda's gentle, sincere persona rubbed off on Garner, greatly to Garner's benefit.

Garner subsequently moved to television commercials and eventually to television roles. In 1955, Garner was considered for the lead role in the Western series Cheyenne, but that role went to Clint Walker because the casting director could not reach Garner in time (according to Garner's autobiography). Garner wound up playing an Army officer in the 1955 Cheyenne pilot titled "Mountain Fortress." His first film appearances were in The Girl He Left Behind and Toward the Unknown in 1956.

In 1957, he had a supporting role in the TV anthology series episode on Conflict entitled "Man from 1997," portraying Maureen (Gloria Talbott)'s brother "Red"; the show stars Jacques Sernas as Johnny Vlakos and Charlie Ruggles as elderly Mr. Boyne, a librarian from 1997, and involved a 1997 Almanac that was mistakenly left in the past by Boyne and found by Johnny in a bookstore. The series' producer Roy Huggins noted in his Archive of American Television interview that he subsequently cast Garner as the lead in Maverick due to his comedic facial expressions while playing scenes in "Man from 1997" that were not originally written to be comical. He changed his last name from Bumgarner to Garner after the studio had credited him as "James Garner" without permission. He then legally changed it upon the birth of his first child, when he decided she had too many names.

Nominated for 15 Emmy Awards during his television career, Garner received the award in 1977 as Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series (The Rockford Files) and in 1987 as executive producer of Promise. For his contribution to the film and television industry, Garner received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

In 1990, he was inducted into the Western Performers Hall of Fame at the National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. He was also inducted into the Television Hall of Fame that same year. In February 2005, he received the Screen Actors Guild's Lifetime Achievement Award. He was also nominated for Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Supporting Role that year, for The Notebook. When Morgan Freeman won that prize for his work in Million Dollar Baby, Freeman led the audience in a sing-along of the original Maverick theme song, written by David Buttolph and Paul Francis Webster.

Garner was a strong Democratic Party supporter. From 1982, Garner gave at least $29,000 to Federal campaigns, of which over $24,000 was to Democratic Party candidates, including Dennis Kucinich (for Congress in 2002), Dick Gephardt, John Kerry, Barbara Boxer, and various Democratic committees and groups.

On August 28, 1963, Garner was one of several celebrities to join Martin Luther King Jr. in the "March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom". In his autobiography, Garner recalled sitting in the third row listening to King's "I Have a Dream" speech.

For his role in the 1985 CBS miniseries Space, the character's party affiliation was changed from Republican as in the book to reflect Garner's personal views. Garner said, "My wife would leave me if I played a Republican."

There was an effort by California Democratic party leaders, led by state Senator Herschel Rosenthal, to persuade Garner to seek the Democratic nomination for Governor of California in the 1990 election. However, future United States Senator and former San Francisco Mayor Dianne Feinstein received the nomination instead, losing to Republican Pete Wilson in the election

Garner was married to Lois Josephine Fleischman Clarke, whom he met at a party in 1956. They married 14 days later on August 17, 1956. "We went to dinner every night for 14 nights. I was just absolutely nuts about her. I spent $77 on our honeymoon, and it about broke me." According to Garner, "Marriage is like the Army; everyone complains, but you'd be surprised at the large number of people who re-enlist." His wife was Jewish.

When Garner and Clarke married, her daughter Kim from a previous marriage was seven years old and recovering from polio. Garner had one daughter with Lois: Greta "Gigi" Garner. In an interview in Good Housekeeping with Garner, his wife, and two daughters, conducted at their home, and published in March 1976, Gigi's age was given as 18 and Kim's as 27.

In 1970, Garner and his wife briefly lived separately for three months. In late 1979, Garner again separated from his wife (around the time The Rockford Files stopped filming), splitting his time between living in Canada and "a rented house in the Valley". The two resumed living together in September 1981, and remained married for the rest of his life. Garner said that the separations were not caused by marital problems, instead stating that he simply needed to spend time alone in order to recover from the stress of acting. Garner died less than a month before their 58th wedding anniversary.

Garner's knees became a chronic problem during the filming of The Rockford Files in the 1970s, with "six or seven knee operations during that time". In 2000, he underwent knee replacement surgery for both of them.

On April 22, 1988, Garner had quintuple bypass heart surgery. Though he recovered rapidly, he was advised to stop smoking. Garner quit smoking 17 years later.

Garner underwent surgery on May 11, 2008, following a severe stroke he had suffered two days earlier. His prognosis was reported to be "very positive". Garner was a private and introverted man, according to family and friends, On July 19, 2014, police and rescue personnel were summoned to Garner's Los Angeles-area home, where they found the actor dead at the age of 86. He had suffered a "massive" heart attack caused by coronary artery disease. He had been in poor health since his stroke in 2008.

Longtime friends Tom Selleck (who worked with Garner on The Rockford Files), Sally Field (who worked with Garner in Murphy's Romance) and Clint Eastwood (who guest-starred with Garner on Maverick and starred in Space Cowboys) reflected on his death. Selleck said, "Jim was a mentor to me and a friend, and I will miss him." Field said, "My heart just broke. There are few people on this planet I have adored as much as Jimmy Garner. I cherish every moment I spent with him and relive them over and over in my head. He was a diamond." Eastwood said, "Garner opened the door for people like Steve McQueen and myself."

#July 19 #2014 #R.I.P.#James Garner #Hollywood Legend #James Rockford #Rockford Files

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justforbooks · 4 years

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One Hundred and One Dalmatians is a 1961 American animated adventure comedy film produced by Walt Disney Productions and based on the 1956 novel The Hundred and One Dalmatians by Dodie Smith. Directed by Clyde Geronimi, Hamilton Luske, and Wolfgang Reitherman, it was Disney's 17th animated feature film. The film tells the story of a litter of Dalmatian puppies who are kidnapped by the villainous Cruella de Vil ("deVille"), who wants to use their fur to make into coats. Their parents, Pongo and Perdita, set out to save their children from Cruella, in the process rescuing 84 additional puppies that were bought in pet shops, bringing the total of Dalmatians to 101.

The film was originally released in theaters on January 25, 1961, and was a box office success, pulling the studio out of the financial slump caused by Sleeping Beauty, a costlier production released two years prior. Aside from its box office revenue, its commercial success was due to the employment of inexpensive animation techniques—such as using xerography during the process of inking and painting traditional animation cels—that kept production costs down. Disney would later release a live-action adaptation named 101 Dalmatians in 1996 and its sequel, 102 Dalmatians in 2000. A direct to video animated sequel to the 1961 film named 101 Dalmatians II: Patch's London Adventure was released in 2003. A live-action spin-off/prequel called Cruella directed by Craig Gillespie is scheduled to be released on May 28, 2021.

One Hundred and One Dalmatians was first released in theaters on January 25, 1961. The film was re-released theatrically in 1969, 1979, 1985, and 1991. The 1991 reissue was the 20th highest-grossing film of the year for domestic earnings.

One Hundred and One Dalmatians was first released on VHS on April 10, 1992, as part of the Walt Disney Classics video series. By June 1992, it had sold 11.1 million copies. At the time, it was the sixth best-selling video of all time. It was re-released on March 9, 1999, as part of the Walt Disney Masterpiece Collection video series. Due to technical issues, it was later released on LaserDisc and was delayed numerous times before its release on DVD. The film was re-released on VHS, and for the first time on DVD, in December 1999, as a Walt Disney Limited Issue for a limited 60-day time period before going into moratorium. A two-disc Platinum Edition DVD was released on March 4, 2008. It was released on Blu-ray Disc in the United Kingdom on September 3, 2012. A Diamond Edition Blu-ray of the film was released in North America on February 10, 2015. A Limited Edition from Disney Movie Club was released on Blu-ray and DVD combo on November 6, 2018. Then it was re-released on HD digital download and Blu-ray on September 24, 2019 as part of the Walt Disney Signature Collection.

During its initial theatrical run, the film grossed $14 million in the United States and Canada, which generated $6.2 million in distributor rentals. It was also the most popular film of the year in France, with admissions of 14.7 million ranking tenth on their all-time list.

The film was re-released in 1969, where it earned $15 million. In its 1979 theatrical re-release, it grossed $19 million, and in 1985, the film grossed $32 million. During its fourth re-release in 1991, it grossed $60.8 million.

Prior to 1995, the film had grossed $86 million overseas. In 1995, it grossed $71 million overseas bringing its international total to $157 million. The film's total domestic lifetime gross is $145 million, and its total worldwide gross is $303 million. Adjusted for inflation, and incorporating subsequent releases, the film has a lifetime gross of $900.3 million.

In its initial release, the film received critical acclaim from critics, many of whom hailed it as the studio's best release since Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937) and the closest to a real "Disney" film in many years. Howard Thompson of The New York Times wrote, "While the story moves steadily toward a stark, melodramatic "chase" climax, it remains enclosed in a typical Disney frame of warm family love, human and canine". However, he later opined that the "[s]ongs are scarce, too. A few more would have braced the final starkness". Variety claimed that "While not as indelibly enchanting or inspired as some of the studio's most unforgettable animated endeavors, this is nonetheless a painstaking creative effort". Time praised the film as "the wittiest, most charming, least pretentious cartoon feature Walt Disney has ever made". Harrison's Reports felt all children and adults will be "highly entertained by Walt Disney's latest, a semi-sophisticated, laugh-provoking, all cartoon, feature-lengther in Technicolor." Dodie Smith also enjoyed the film where she particularly praised the animation and backgrounds of the film.

Contemporary reviews have remained positive. Reviewing the film during its 1991 re-release, Roger Ebert of the Chicago Sun-Times, while giving the film three stars out of four, asserted that "it's an uneven film, with moments of inspiration in a fairly conventional tale of kidnapping and rescue. This is not one of the great Disney classics - it's not in the same league with Snow White or Pinocchio - but it's passable fun, and will entertain its target family audiences." Chicago Tribune film critic Gene Siskel, in his 1991 review, also gave the film three stars out of four. Ralph Novak of People wrote "What it lacks in romantic extravagance and plush spectacle, this 1961 Disney film makes up for in quiet charm and subtlety. In fact, if any movie with dogs, cats and horses who talk can be said to belong in the realm of realistic drama, this is it". However, the film did receive a few negative reviews. In 2011, Craig Berman of MSNBC ranked it and its 1996 remake as two of the worst children's films of all time, saying that, "The plot itself is a bit nutty. Making a coat out of dogs? Who does that? But worse than Cruella de Vil's fashion sense is the fact that your children will definitely start asking for a Dalmatian of their own for their next birthday".

The review aggregator website Rotten Tomatoes reported the film received an approval rating of 98% based on 49 reviews with an average score of 8.1/10. The website's critical consensus reads, "With plenty of pooches and a memorable villain (Cruella De Vil), this is one of Disney's most enduring, entertaining animated films".

Cruella de Vil ranked 39th on AFI's list of "100 Years...100 Heroes and Villains".

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com

#JUST FOR BOOKS #101 dalmatians #Walt Disney #1961 #The Hundred and One Dalmatians #Dodie Smith

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invisibleinorange · 4 years

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Bridgerton’s Adrift | 19/?

Chapters: 19/? Fandom: Bridgerton Rating: M Warnings: Presumed Character Death Relationships: Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington(besties), Bridgerton Family Dynamics, Simon Hastings/Daphne Bridgerton Characters: Colin Bridgerton, Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton, Anthony Featherington, Benedict Bridgerton, Portia Featherington, Violet Bridgerton, Pretty Much Everyone (at points) Additional Tags: Bridgerton, Polin Summary: Unexpected bad news arrives for the Bridgerton Family (and friends) regarding Colin's travels. This will be a series that is set after "The Duke and I" or season one of the show. It is a companion piece to "Goodbyes".

Colin was only a man and as such he couldn’t help but want Penelope. His desire for her burned through every fiber of his being anytime she so much as looked at him. He didn’t honestly know how he had been so blind in the previous season.

The irony was that no one really had. He’d certainly thought Marina was beautiful and he’d fancied himself in love with her but he hadn’t desired her. When he’d learned the truth about her and everything had ended, he hadn’t felt as if the world was ending. He’d felt relief.

Whatever she’d woke in him was thunderously loud in his head though. He was pretty sure that he would actually die of a broken heart if Penelope hadn’t returned his affections though. If he’d returned back and been forced to watch her live as wife to his brother, he probably would have thrown himself into the Thames as dramatic as that might be.

He couldn’t live without her.

As much as he was enjoying sneaking away, stealing some kisses it was becoming difficult to not take it further. He could impatient and impulsive at times. Anthony had once told him that it was a matter of him being young.

He was tired of being apart from her or doing what was socially appropriate. He wanted to start his life with her and he didn’t want to wait or get permission from Anthony or his mother to do it.

As he laid with her, unable to sleep for fear of missing out of a single moment of solitude with her he knew what he wanted. He’d never been certain of anything in his life and he needed to verbalize it.

Penelope Featherington had to be his wife.

“Elope with me, Pen,” he murmured, body tilted toward hers. A hand was grazing her face despite the fact she was half-asleep he knew that she could hear him.

The question had pulled her back into consciousness enough to hear the question and think it over. It was absolute madness. They were already going to be enough trouble for stealing away to some inn. The accusations of ruin were going to be plentiful.

She’d imagined Colin Bridgerton asking her to marry him a million times throughout her short life and none of those had been like this.

The reality didn’t seem any less than any of those daydreams though and despite the fact that she she’d tasked him with courting her it was no longer reasonable. They were playing a dangerous game sneaking around and eventually they were going to cave to lust or get caught. With his name attached to hers they would be immune from scandal.

There was one thing that she hadn’t told him though, one thing that only Benedict knew about. She’d thought it imperative for anyone who was going to be permanently attached to her to know. Benedict had taken the information well. He’d been impressed with her. She wasn’t completely sure that Colin would feel the same way.

She sat up.

“I – I - need to tell you something first and - it might change everything. I should have told you weeks ago but I didn’t want to ruin having you back with this,” she told him. The weight of it definitely did bear down on her.

Colin sat up as well, brows furrowing in concern.

“If something happened between you and Benedict when you thought I was dead, I – I can’t be mad about that,” he said stating the first thing that had come to mind. The one thing that he’d certainly thought about more times than he might have appreciated.

She frowned at the implication.

“I’ve only ever kissed you,” she said defensively. Perhaps, she’d grown to care for his brother but nothing inappropriate had happened. There was nothing that she needed to admit there. It was almost insulting that he thought that something might have occurred there.

Her arms crossed and it was clear she wasn’t pleased.

Colin didn’t know what she could possibly have to say that would change how he felt about her. There was literally nothing.

“I love you, Pen. I’m not going to change my mind,” he told her firmly, hoping that would be enough to get her to tell him whatever it was.

“I wrote the article about Marina,” she told him after a long moment. “I tried my best to tell you the truth but her situation and you weren’t listening and I knew you were serious about eloping with her. I couldn’t let you –“

“Whistledown did that,” he said after a long moment shaking his head.

“And I’m her,” Penelope said after a long moment.

Colin’s jaw tightened with anger and Penelope was certain he was going to get out of the bed and leave her there. His silence was terrifying. To her credit, he did get up and he paced the small space of the room a few times, inhaling sharply as if trying to gather his wits about him. He didn’t leave though.

“I know that you won’t be able to look at me the same way,” she said after a long moment, arms relaxing but voice pleading, feet dangling off the bed and she debated pursuing him, “I never intended to hurt anyone. I was just desperate and you weren’t listening to reason. She told me that you could never love me – but it never changed the fact that I loved you.”

Colin moved across the space of the room, he gripped at her shoulders more forcefully than he probably should before finding himself when he realized she looked frightened. “You could have been ruined,” he said trying to keep his voice low but he was shaking with fury though who it was directed at was unknown. “If someone knew… If someone figured it out… The Queen could have had you locked away and you could have lost your head. What was I thinking?-”

He wasn’t mad about Marina at all. It was the peril she’d placed herself in that bothered him. He dropped his hands after a moment, pacing starting back again. Penelope wasn’t sure what to say or how to make this right.

“I could have gotten you in trouble with my own selfishness. I was such an idiot and you were in front of me the whole time and I wasn’t even in love with her. I was in love with the idea of being in love until I realized I loved you.”

Penelope wasn’t sure if it was smart to approach or not. Colin seemed to be in the middle of a bit of a breakdown of sorts. She’d never seen him so out of sorts and she didn’t quite know what this meant for his proposal or the future.

“Col-” she said after a minute, finally climbing back to her feet, moving tentatively over to him, a hand on his shoulder.

He spun back, eyes dark as he glowered down at her. He reached a hand out and he pulled her to him successfully earning a squeak of surprise.

“I need you to understand something,” he told her firmly. There was a pause and his eyes moved to her lips. She nodded at him, quiet as she waited for him to yell, scream or put her in her place. His grip was firm but his did soften slightly as he backed her to the bed, letting her body fall into it. This was hardly the reaction she’d anticipated and her heart sped up.

“I’m always going to love you and if anyone ever makes you think otherwise ever again, I’m going to murder them,” he continued, climbing over her using his arms to keep himself from squishing her.

“You still want me?” she asked, gazing up to him in surprise.

He answered by pressing a needful kiss to her mouth. He was done waiting on some arbitrary thing to confirm what was in his heart. He could get past her being Whistledown. What he couldn’t get past was her trying to help him and him ignoring it or the fact that Marina Thompson would dare try and speak for how he felt. He might not have been smart enough to have had it figured out but that didn’t mean he hadn’t cared for her then. He would have been as furious then as he was now. He would moved Heaven and Earth to prove the words false.

Even if it had been another lifetime ago, he still felt an urgency to show Penelope just how he felt about her.

She returned his kiss, making it loud and clear that she was not going to deny him whatever he needed to get through this moment. Her legs opened almost reflexively, arms pulling him closer until there was no space between their bodies.

“Let me have you,” he demanded against her lips. His voice was raspy, a mixture of all the emotions he was feeling flooding into this near plead because he wouldn’t dare ever do anything that Penelope didn’t consent to. He couldn’t stomach the prospect of doing her more harm.

He didn’t exactly stop himself from further exploration while he waited the answer. His mouth darted to her throat and down letting his tongue taste her skin, a hand already set to working on the buttons of the dress she’d had on since they left London.

“Yes,” she told him firmly.

The dress was honestly done for. Colin didn’t mean to be overzealous, especially when he hadn’t exactly gone above and beyond for packing. He’d have to bribe someone to go purchase something new in the morning but he didn’t give a damn about the logistics of it all at the moment, especially when the buttons popped so easily and he could push at the fabric.

Somewhere in his mind, he’d thought to promise that he’d be gentle and make sure that she enjoyed this. He was speechless at the sight of her bare breasts. He’d seen her in nightgowns and shifts a time or two in recent weeks but he’d never dared push his luck.

He let out an audible groan before letting his mouth move down, one hand teasing one of her breasts while the his tongue and teeth explored the other. He kept going until he had earned a moan out. Then and only then did he switch to the other side. He had to be equal opportunity here.

He couldn’t help but laugh softly when he felt her small hand, tugging him back to her lips by the hairs on his head. He willingly came though, never one to turn way her demand for kisses.

He had to put a hand under her hip in an attempt to shift her though, in an effort to tug at the fabric so that he might address the issue of unmentionables.

Colin forced himself off her long enough to let his hands do the work it needed to do to rid her of the rest of the fabric. His eyes met hers as he went to undo his trousers. He’d removed his shirt at some point during their earlier somehow less innocent kisses and it wouldn’t require much to free his erection.

Penelope’s eyes widened slightly at the sight of him though she didn’t provide commentary, didn’t dare ask the million questions that she had. She’d gotten enough information from Daphne before her almost-wedding night that she had nothing to fear.

Colin was back on her in a minute, pressing a tempered kiss to her mouth then her nose before he let a hand move down her middle through the thatch of hair until her found the tantalizing heat of her center. He practically throbbed with need for her but he had to restrain himself a little longer.

“Tell me if it’s too much,” he murmured and she felt one finger dip inside of her. The sensation caused her body to shift against him and an indelicate sound escaping her that only spurred him to keep going.

Penelope had been horrifically embarrassed at the graphic explanation of intimacy from Daphne. She had to give her some credit though. She’d not lied when she said there was much to be enjoyed.

His fingers were working just fine and every time he touched her differently or added more it only served to make her want him more.

“Col-“ she murmured after a moment.

His eyes met hers and there was no mistaking what she was saying even if he already knew. He scaled back up her body, positioning his body before he began to slip inside, nearly exploding at just how perfect she truly felt around him.

It took ever fiber of his being not to bury himself completely but he knew that he needed to take his time, knew that there would be some temporary pain involved here. He was calculated slow, biding his time and just savoring the little sounds that were coming out of her.

He paused when he finally found resistance and he forged ahead. He ceased all motion when he saw the slightest hint of pain cross her features, balancing himself enough so that he might run a hand through her curls to distract her from pain that he’d never have to put her through again.

When he felt her shift against him slightly, he knew that it was okay to move and it all felt so perfectly natural. He lost himself to it though he certainly didn’t let himself get overly carried away. He wasn’t going to last long. Not this time. It had been pent up inside of him for far too long.

He let a hand move between them, working nerve endings that he knew would push her there as well while his mouth worked the one spot that he knew would make her squirm.

Penelope definitely did squirm, though she couldn’t quite explain everything that was happening in her body she knew that it was right and she was close to something. When it hit, her body shook and she gasped. Had she forgotten to breathe for minutes? Hours? She couldn’t even remember.

It was just enough to push him to climax, collapsing next to her. Her tugged her in, hugging her against him as they both struggled to breath.

“… So… that was a yes to the eloping, right?” he said after a long moment, voice breathless.

She buried her face in his shoulder to fight off a fit of laughter.

The answer was definitely yes.

#⚜ writings — polin #polin #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton

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