#he’s probably embarrassed bc he KNOWS he’s a stereotype but like

[starlooove]

Jon gives me such guitar vibes

[leejungchans]

svt as the types of people you meet in college? it can be totally up to your interpretation of them hehe and they don't have to fit into certain college stereotypes!!!

OH i love this!!!!!! (based on my own experiences mixed with some cliches/aus/imaginings 🫶🏻) sorry this took a while to get to btw 🥲

seungcheol: the senior who manned one of the booths at your freshman orientation. did you join his club bc he was ridiculously attractive and made small talk with you? no comment. you follow each other on instagram but that’s probably about it <//3 definitely a campus crush that feels very unattainable but it doesn’t stop you from imagining what he’d be like as your a boyfriend

jeonghan: you walked past him once, and pretended you heard someone behind you calling your name just so you had an excuse to do a double-take. people this pretty existed?? and at your college/uni?? you told all your friends about him and after some snooping you managed to find his instagram. please just send that follower request, you have nothing to lose <3

joshua: i can totally see him being a student advisor omg!! so so so sweet, actually checks in on you often and is genuinely interested in knowing how things are going for you :’) does his best to give good advice, but as you became closer friends you became more familiar with his sense of humour and his advice got increasingly……interesting 😭 “your prof said what? next time trip him in the hallway!” “joshua nO” don’t do that

jun: sat in front of you in one of your courses last year, fell asleep during the lecture almost every single week. his friends gave up on keeping him awake halfway through the semester. you became friends after being randomly assigned to the same group for project and now you’re the friend who has to keep him awake during classes. he’s so cool though, and very witty and funny <3

soonyoung: even if you don’t know him personally, you always run into him on campus. grabbing a coffee at the cafe, goofing off with his friends in the quad, dozing off in the library…he’s friendly with everyone, even the grumpiest professors. you want to be his friend so bad, he just seems so fun to be around. also the only person you know who wears tiger print but he pulls it off!!

wonwoo: you have a class with him and he always sits in the back. so quiet and shy, barely talks to anyone but he’s really cute so you noticed him regardless. you got paired up for a discussion and found out how smart and well-spoken he was, and you guess he vibed with you too bc since then he started saving you a seat :’)) occasionally plays games on his laptop when the lecture gets boring, and angles the screen more towards you so you can watch <3

jihoon: a friend of a friend. you’ve never met but jun tells you so much about him, so it almost feels like you know him too. you follow him on instagram and occasionally he’ll post covers of him singing while playing the guitar. you offhandedly mentioned to jun that his voice is so pretty and soothing and much to your embarrassment he tells jihoon 😭 but it’s okay bc he’s setting up a hangout to officially introduce you both to each other!!

seokmin: the friend we wish we all had. you met on your very first day of college/uni when you had the same class. he initiated convo with you and was so sweet and friendly even though you could tell he was extremely nervous himself, protect him omg 💔 one of your closest friends to this day even if you don’t have the same majors. you enrol in random electives together and those lectures are always your favourite bc you sit in the back and goof off, just try not to get shushed too much <33

mingyu: spilled coffee on your shoes at the starbucks on campus 🙁 it’s not his fault it was really crowded and someone bumped into him causing him to bump into you!! also, he looked very guilty about it so you couldn’t find it in you to be mad. he pays for your coffee as an apology. he recognises you when you stand behind him in line two weeks later and jokes that he won’t spill anything on you this time. you became friends and now you understand why his close friends (affectionately) bully him so much bc he’s just a puppy trapped in a 6ft man’s body 🤧

minghao: literally the main character. he doesn’t walk, he struts and it works for him. so effortlessly cool and attractive. a huge motivating factor for showing up to that class is getting to see what his outfit for that day is. one time you mustered up the courage to compliment his shirt, and your heart swelled at how his face lit up immediately :’)

seungkwan: if you hear the sound of ice being shaken around in a plastic cup mid-lecture, 9 times out of 10 that’s him. he’s an iced coffee girlie he’s just like me. you became friends after he sincerely complimented you on how well you did in your midterm presentation 🤧 the sweetest most caring person ever, but he shows his affection by (playfully) judging you while sipping his iced americanos <3

vernon: took the seat across from you in the library one day while you were cramming for a test. has the coolest stickers on his headphones. you aren’t sure if he actually got any work done bc he seemed really into the music he was listening to. you accidentally made eye contact and he gave you a dorky little smile <3 you exchanged contacts the second time you happened upon each other at that very same table and he showed you a pic of his cat hehe

chan: this is sooooo self-indulgent bc i’ve had these thoughts for the longest time……he’s such a loser (affectionate) omg………..he sat next to you for a quiz and realised he didn’t have a pen 😭 blushed so hard when you offered to lend him a spare one before profusely thanking you. forgets to return it………..you thought you lost that pen for good but when he walked into class the next week, his eyes desperately searched the room looking for you, and with an sheepish smile he returned your pen along with a candy bar as an apology for forgetting…….he’s so cute i hate him so much🧎🏻‍♀️

a/n: many feelings about college bf!wonwoo and chan…….

[anime-owo-kage-san]

Please, let me indulge in these thoughts for a while.

But, what if Charlie thinks of writing a play for the hotel to perform? Maybe a play about redemption, and within the play has a sinner transform into an angel after getting redeemed.

At first she asks Vaggie to play the sinner to angel part, because she already has angel wings. But, Vaggie insists maybe Angel Dust should play the role, since he’s the hotel’s first (and only, if we’re talking ‘post-canon’) guest.

Charlie over excitedly agrees, before Angel could even have his say and starts sketching out his ‘angel costume’.

Angel Dust doesn’t know why, but one look at the costume design made him feel a little self-conscious. Which is weird because he never gets self-conscious! (Unless it comes to his feet.)

But then again, after all the sexy, skimpy and lacey clothes he’s worn, wearing an angel costume that Charlie designed to be so flowy and stereotypically pure white (an exaggeration to what the angels they’ve seen actually wore) and the fluffy wings—made him strangely… ‘undeserving’ of the role.

The idea of wearing this on stage, in front of everyone, after being known as a pornstar all his afterlife, makes him feel like he’ll just be mocked from the irony.

Phone Call Scenario In My Head:

Angel: *just finished a porno shoot and in the middle of putting on his robe*

*phone starts ringing on a desk away from him*

Random guy: “Uh, Angel… Your phone’s ringing…”

Angel: “Put it on speaker, for me. It’s probably just Cherri again.” *still tying his robe*

Random guy: *picks up phone and puts it on speaker*

(Through the phone) Charlie: “ANGEEEL!!!”

Angel: *turns his head* Charlie…?

Valentino: *eyes narrowed, bc he’s still pissed about last time*

Charlie: “I’m. So. FUCKING EXCITED FOR THE SHOW TONIGHT! You’ll be on time for rehearsal, right? You’re the STAR after all!” *squeals*

Angel: *suddenly remembers the show and his face slowly turns pink* “U-Uh yeah…. Don’t worry, I-I just finished up work… I’ll be there….”

Valentino: *raises his brow at Angel* “Show…?”

Charlie: “Okay! Oooh! I can’t wait to see you in the costume! It’s finally finished! Please, come back as soon as possible so we can see how it looks on you!” *definitely jumping up and down on the other side*

Angel: *tries to hide how weirdly shy he feels* “Pssh! Doll face, I’ll look good in anything! I…. I’ll be there…”

Charlie: “Okay! See you later!”

(Call ends)

Valentino: *makes his way to Angel while smirking* “Well! It looks like this hotel you’re staying at isn’t as ‘clean’ as the princess, makes it sound.”

Angel: *looks at him confused* “The fuck are you talkin’ about?”

Valentino: “Oh, you know… That flustered look on your face, says it all! You’re not one to be embarrassed though, amorcito. Pray tell, how sexy is this costume of yours, that even you couldn’t help but flush?”

Angel: *only half paying attention, still thinking about the costume and embarrassed* “It’s…. not, anything like that. Look, I’m done with work. I’m just gonna go.”

Angel: *grabs his phone and leaves before Val can say anything*

Valentino: “Dumb whore. Performing shows somewhere else.”

So, sinners come to watch the show, after seeing Alastor’s advertisement of it —Which didn’t give anyone much context. All they knew was that Angel Dust was performing a show at the hotel, and the show was free!

Valentino shows up just to be a ‘porn critic’, because like everyone else, he still thinks it that type of show.

Angel Dust, who was peaking at the audience backstage gets more nervous, and hides in the dressing room. He was already wearing the costume, but he doesn’t want anyone to see him wearing it.

Sprinkle some Huskerdust into this; Husk is the one who convinces Angel to come out, and build his confidence back up. (Maybe some cheesy, wholesome words about how despite being in hell, he’s “Hell’s only angel, for him —didn’t think this far).

Angel: *peaks his head out the door* “What about Flat Tits?”

Husk: “That doesn’t count. She was from heaven. So for me, you are hell’s angel…”

Angel: “What about Charlie’s da—”

Husk: “Christ! Would you get out here already. Before I stop attempting to compliment you.”

Angel: *laughs lightly* “Yeah, okay. Sorry…”

And the show goes on. Sure, just like Angel expected, the majority of the audience were commenting on the choice of his role. But, he didn’t care anymore. Whenever he looks to the side and sees Husk giving him a supportive smile, he regains confidence and continues on with the play.

[kanekoii]

There are a lot of people who speak multiple languages in nijien so what abt reader saying “ily” in their language not realizing they speak that? With maybe Aia(vietnamese), Selen(mandarin/cantonese), Elira(Japanese/french), or Zali(french)?

lyra’s notes -> hi hello this is the cutest idea ever thank you for blessing me with this idea anon

pairings -> aia amare, selen tatsuki, elira pendora, vezalius bandage x gn! reader

genre -> fluffy and a tiny bit of angst

song -> 好きって言って - ちいたな

warnings -> unrequited love, google translate only in aia’s (the rest of the languages i know at least a little of), japanese in elira’s bc zali is THE french guy

AIA AMARE ->

when you were in an off-collab with aia, she most definitely did NOT expect you to say that you loved her in her native language. she knew you had a tendency to say things in vietnamese that you’d be too shy to say in english, and unfortunately for you, you didn’t know that she spoke the language fluently. but aia’s face lit up when you mumbled something that sounded just like “tôi yêu bạn”which is a confession of love in her language. without missing a beat she replies that aww she loves you too, and only when you’re not around will she allow herself to blush and fluster over the fact that you said you loved her in her language. it wasn’t just sweet, it made aia’s day- no- month at the very least. even if she’s not sure it was a real confession, she would waste no time to say it back.

SELEN TATSUKI ->

the very second the words “愛你” left your mouth, she would sigh in a jokingly exaggerated manner to hide her blush. of course, you didn’t know she knew what you were saying which made you incredibly embarrassed. you figured that, if you said things in a different language, she wouldn’t be able to understand, but clearly that backfired horribly. you had been dating my favorite pantsless gamer for a little while now, but you had never said that you loved her yet. it wasn’t that you didn’t love her, quite the opposite really. it was just that you were scared of driving her away. but from then on, you would only say 愛你 to each other instead of a stereotypical ‘i love you’. it just felt so much more intimate.

ELIRA PENDORA ->

surely she wasn’t expecting you to say “愛してる” on stream to her. she’s glad she was off camera anyway in that moment because elira doesn’t think she’ll ever recover from just how cute it was. it’s doubtful that she’ll ever forget it, even if she’s not sure if you meant it the way she thought you did. even if it was a confession of love in your own way, she’d probably doubt it until you said it again. and she definitely hopes you will say it again, because god it’s adorable. and she loves you too, so maybe one day she’ll muster up the confidence to say it back. maybe. yet elira doubts she might ever have the courage to say it even if she wanted to scream it out and wanted you to be hers.

VEZALIUS BANDAGE ->

you didn’t think he’d hear it when you said it. it’s no secret that he’d understand what you were saying when you mumbled a quiet ‘je t’aime’ under your breath. zali would brush it off but you could see just in his eyes that his mind was moving at a million miles a minute. his golden eyes softened as he looked at you with a small smile. maybe zali would soon learn to express his love too, just give him time and he’ll express it with as much sincerity as he could possibly muster. one day he’ll leave a note for you to find that simply read “je t’aime aussi” and that’s his way of confessing it for you quietly and shyly.

[stinky-fuck-swag]

Stinky Fuck Swag Bracket B Side A: Round 1, Match 3

Toko Fukawa (Danganronpa) VS L (Death Note)

Propaganda under the cut!

Toko Fukawa:

canonically doesn't bathe

she does not bathe! there's a reason for this but I forgot. also doesn't brush her teeth. this is brought up a lot bc the other characters are mean to her heart emoji :( she's very silly! she's a writer, she survived murder highschool, she survived murder city, there's cut scenes of her sexual fantasies about a guy who very much hates her, she has DID (it's written as a horribly ableist stereotype), and she's besties with the most Normal Person ever. and she's rude to ppl ♥️ i liek her :)

Literally just doesn't bathe. She has a fear of water so severe she refuses to shower. She stinks so bad at one point Byakuya (the guy she likes) points it out and tells her to go take a bath.

She doesn't bathe and has a pet stink bug. At one point in the first game she doesn't know a certain fact about the school bathrooms which would only be possible if she hadn't bathed since the death game began and is embarrassed when this is pointed out. In the Ultra Despair Girls game it's revealed that her closest friend is her pet stink bug who's the only one who didn't mind how she smelled (and whose presence probably made her smell worse). In Danganronpa 3 her new friend is shown having to physically fight and drag her into the bathroom to try and get her to wash.

L:

there is no universe in which he bathes. he sits alone in an empty hotel room looking at computer all day. people who say L is clean are wrong.

[liliansun]

how to piss the boys off so they fuck me dumb 🥴

i’ll start first w suggestions 😛🥴 (minors dni!!!)

mark : embarrass him. and i don’t mean like say he shit himself last week or that he accidentally put on your thong half asleep after practice one night. i mean like get drunk,, be around his friends,, when they start talking about their sizes (bc they too are drunk) flirt w them passively. say you bet jeno is probably the biggest in the room. talk about the other men you’ve been ‘with’ even if you know none of them compare to mark and he’ll get pissed and he’ll drag you off when you’re alone and fuck all those lil silly thoughts out of your head. ‘you really want to tell me you think jeno can fuck you like this? you really got some sense of humor. bet he can’t make you cum the way i can.’

renjun : irritate him. sexually frustrate him. piss him off and blue ball him. tell him he’s not getting any because haechan is in the room and you don’t wanna wake poor hyuckie up and he’ll loose all restraint. ‘who gives a fuck what haechan does or doesn’t hear, he’s a perv anyway, he’ll probably enjoy hearing how wet you get for me. why don’t we give him a show, hm? i’m not asking, i’m giving you a warning.’

jeno : flirt with the boys in front of him. i read something like this (shout out to the angel who wrote it bc i can’t think of who it was or the title was but it was jeno getting pissed bc oc spilled water on jaem’s lap and offered to clean him up. IF YALL READ IT YALL KNOW.) esp jaem,, ask jaem to flex his big strong arms,, talk about how buff he’s been getting and complement him on his work in the gym. jeno will embody silent anger. he’ll wait till you’re unaware of your guard being down to make his claim over you. fucking you with no care of who is hearing. ‘you think he’s so fucking strong, huh? do you think he can fuck you like i can? he can’t fuck you while holding your pathetic ass up against the wall. he won’t make you make a mess on his cock like i can.’ (he’ll be a lil mouthy and a bit degrading..but that’s the fun part.)

haechan : game with him and be the stereotypical hot gamer girl every boy has wet dreams for. unknowingly (knowingly) flirt w the boys on the mic and tease them and he’ll get fed up. he knows boys like them,, he was once a boy like them till he met you. and he’ll waste no time to hop offline to fuck you over the desk while forcing you to continue to play the game with the headset on. ‘you want to be a lil gamer slut? go ahead and continue playing with your audience while i make sure to remind you who you belong to, pretty girl. they’ll never touch you like i do,, they’ll never fuck you like i can.’

jaemin : he’s rarely the one to get mad,, especially at you. but when one of his superiors makes a pass at you and you do nothing but laugh it off? yeah, he’s pissed. pissed they think they can even pull a girl like you and pissed you let them think they had a chance. he’s pushing your panties aside with you bent over the sink in the bathroom, scissoring you without a care in the world as he watches you drip down to his wrist. ‘such a shame they think they’ll ever get to see you like this, but you don’t mind letting them think that, do you princess?’ just before he’s plowing his cock into you while making you watch him fuck you from behind in the foggy bathroom mirror.

(perhaps i got carried away.)

[wendytestabrat]

kyle’s hypocrisy in season 19 rant #2: his internalized bigotry (FROM THE VAULT [2020])

This is to add onto my post from before about how Kyle was being ignorant assuming David was from Mexico even though he was from Idaho. Honestly the line in “Stunning & Brave” where Cartman is in the hospital bed and he tells Kyle “You and I are bigots” hits so hard now. And Kyle is like “no you’re a bigot”. And I remember when I first saw that I just assumed Kyle was right and it was just Cartman saying dumb shit as usual, but no Cartman was right about Kyle being a bigot too. I liked that Cartman was trying to own up to everything in that moment but it sucks that Kyle was too stubborn to admit to it too. I mean yeah Cartman is WAYY more bigoted than Kyle but that doesn’t excuse the shit Kyle has done. First of all Kyle constantly fat shames Cartman, which is wrong and in that moment Kyle called Cartman fatass again and Cartman literally said “no more fatshaming Kyle” lmaooo. So he basically denies being a bigot but then proceeds to fatshame Cartman. Kyle you’re not making sense. But anyways what I really wanna talk about is the fact that Kyle is pretty much just as insensitive towards Judaism as Cartman. Which may sound surprising because yes, Kyle is a Jew, but it’s not like he’s proud to be one or we ever see him embrace his religion. No, Kyle is ASHAMED of it. Kyle is self conscious about being a Jew which is why he gets soooo offended by Cartman making fun of him for being one, he’s not defending his religion because he’s proud of it, it’s because he probably agrees with Cartman that being a Jew sucks, and he’s embarrassed. (Ya’ll SJWs don’t flip out at me, I’m Jewish too LMAOOO). If he was actually proud to be a Jew then he would just ignore Cartman or laugh it off and not make such a big deal out of it. There was this episode I honestly don’t remember but Kyle literally acted just like Cartman towards his parents, I think he was trying to ask his mom and dad for something and they said no so he was like “don’t be such a Jew” and Sheila flipped out at him for saying that. And Kyle can be quick to turn on his religion like in “Passion of the Jew” after Cartman told him to watch the passion & he believed that the Jews killed Jesus or whatever djsjjs. He literally WENT TO CARTMAN’S DOOR to tell him he was right about Jews. And I think that we really see Kyle’s insensitivity towards his own people play out best with his cousin Kyle. Kyle is embarrassed of his cousin, bc he’s literally the epitome of a negative Jewish stereotype, and in the episode where cousin Kyle shows up for the first time Kyle literally says in his own words “I’ve spent 5 years in this town trying to make a good name for Jews and this stereotype shows up and wrecks it all” Wow. You know what that tells me? Kyle pretty much views Jews as terrible and thinks the world only views negatively of them. I mean yeah there is anti-semitism out there but the fact that Kyle gets so hyper-sensitive about it and doesn’t know how to just shrug it off means he’s really just playing into the anti-semitism himself and making shit worse. And in the older episodes with cousin Kyle, they mostly just show Kyle being embarrassed by him, but in TFBW we see Kyle straight up being a DICK to him. That really shows how much of a bully Kyle is in my opinion, and since he’s so used to Cartman ripping on him for being Jewish he probably thinks it’s okay to pick on another kid that’s more of a Jewish stereotype than him.

update 2024: i have my receipts as usual ⬆️ and yes i’m gonna brag abt this again but i love how i was ahead of my time pointing out how kyle has internalized anti-semitism before anyone else did lol. cartman’s kid deadass called kyle a “self-hating jew” in the post covid episodes lol

[bluest-planet]

Some fun Mexican HCs for Miguel as a mixed Mexican/Salvi first gen American person (don't take these too seriously I haven't read his comics so sorry):

Being Hidalguense I am claiming him for my state >:) suck it Michocanos, Oaxaqueños, Poblanos, Yucatecos, Morelos, Leonés, Potosinos, y Jaliscienses! (And every other state I missed lol.) ((Also this is a BIG joke of course he can be from any state lol))

Not only does he love empanadas but he also loves Pastes. Basically the same thing but better imo. I feel like he'd like Mole Verde, papa con carne, and tinga the best (totally not projecting)

Ik he's from the future and raised by his Irish parent (?) But that man has eaten barbacoa somehow. Idk when Idk how but he has. Bonus points if he's helped in making with friends or smth but I doubt it.

Has tried pulque and does not like it. Loser for this.

Has fished mojara in a shallow lake with his bare feet and claws I bet. Enrichment. I feel like he'd totally know how to skin and gut em to cook but he's also... From a cozy looking futuristic world so maybe he's too modern to get his hands dirty lol.

Tried tenango embroidery at some point as a hobby. Did not work out.

Big fan of drinking atole in the mornings instead of coffee.

Has the weird ability to tell when it's gonna rain. Cause it's always raining in Pachuca lol.

Maybe he visited or stayed in Mex for a hot minute for mission and came back he was friendlier, saying good morning and other pleasantries more often bc the older folks there would constantly say hi to him in buses, streets, shops whatever. (It's actually kinda nice. It fosters camaraderie between strangers in public spaces 100% recommend being friendly to strangers more often.)

Likes fresh juice and agua frescas. Particularly fresh OJ and agua de jamaica.

On that note he also likes fresas con crema. He makes a good bowl and doesn't share with the kids (all of whom try to steal a bite cause it's simple but good)

Starting to realize this is all about food.

Uh

MOST DEFINITELY HAS A PAIR OF NICE HUARACHES and a good leather belt. Necessities.

Do you think he'd have that stereotypical Mexican dad sombrero/cowboy hat? I think it would be so funny if he did but probably not lol.

Doesn't like soccer (yes I'm American ik I'm being a traitor by calling it that) so he gets another loser point for that (not that I like it either tho so like. Same hat.)

One of those customers that somehow knows when the panerias just finished baking a good batch and comes back with bags full of fresh bread for the commissary/as a reward.

My man's just likes carbs okay.

Actually I don't think he'd last very long in the campo.

Spent one night in a rual town and came back covered in bug bites in the worst places (bad experience he also has now.)

One bite was on his eyebrow and got hella swollen and red. Avoided the kids at all costs while it was healing so they wouldn't roast him.

Scolds miles for his spanglish but never offers to correct him so he embarrasses himself. (I'n a teasing way)

Miles picks up on Mexican slang from him like Ashcale doña! Me calle gordo, tragasolas, nada pescadito! and more. He also picks up on saying: "aguas!" As a warning/heads up like Miguel.

They talk shit about others in Spanish in the rare moments they get along.

Miguel always wins at loteria.

Does that thing older relatives do where they sit and talk to each other for hours outside on a sunny humid day breaking and eating countless peanuts and/or walnuts. Then sends the kids with pocket change to buy some homemade popsicles from an old lady down the street that are the best damn popsicles you'll ever eat in your entire life for only 5 pesos. But only when they actually get over their issues and bond.

Certified glass bottle guava bong! Fan. If you know u know.

[snove101]

What're your hc's for Lab Rats?

oh my god bestie i'm so glad you asked 💥💥

silly hcs<3 a handful of them are probably inspired by others hcs or what ive read in fanfics :,)🫶

chase

• he/him bi transman

• the tism

• spike is,,,, still an issue

• eczema !!! lactose intolerance !!! a lot of natural inconveniencing things that you'd expect to be “removed” or smth from a bionic superhuman experiment. he's pissed abt it

• the tism (again)

• tied bree’s and adam’s shoes when he was a little kid because he was the first one to learn how to do it. he still ties adams shoes on occasion

• family therapist; desperately needs therapy

- send this boy to therapy please

• lots of insecurity based around his position as mission leader

• lots of insecurity in general this guy's a mess

• praise makes him feel all bubbly and 📳 inside /nx

- /x too

• absolutely did top surgery on himself. he doesn't talk about it bc of how,,, messy and frustrating it was

• trust issues that definitely did not stem from his paternal figure (lie)

• him and tasha are like 🤞🤞 besides adam and bree, she's the only person he's like,, emotionally vulnerable with

bree

• she/her bi fem leaning

• thought she was straight for like,, majority of her life so she'd throw herself at any boy within running distance

- kissed a girl Once at a sleepover and realized Oh I Can Like Girls 🏳️‍🌈

• adhd inattentive type !!!!! went undiagnosed until the academy days even though chase was like “r u sure you don't have adhd” every other month since middle school

• moderately popular on tiktok before the world knew about their bionics

-she includes adam and chase on occasion and ppl will ask who the cute boys are. she answers w what cute boys:)?

-she's made chase be her cameraman sm times (he doesn't mind it)

• SHE AND TASHA HAVE THE SWEETEST MOTHER DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIP I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

• down bad so easily it's embarrassing

• she's a little rat bastard on occasion. a little asshole as a treat

• the first person chase came out to as bi And trans 💥🫶

• protective of her family 💥💥💥 do Not fuck with them

• daddy's girl (we knew this)

adam

• he/him unlabeled !!! pansexuality is probably the most accurate for him but if anyone asks he just says queer and leaves

• stereotypical adhd. chase diagnosed him when they were kids and donald was like yeah sounds abt right then ignored treatment

• MOMMAS BOY 💥💥💥💥💥 (we also knew this)

-tasha actually trusts him a lot,,, mostly with things that aren't fragile/glass

• went to the taylor swift eras tour with bree

-he cried

• if he can respond to text in emojis he will. mostly w 💪😟⁉️💥

• protective of his family like bree but he Will fuck you up if you mess with them

•his eyesight really deteriorated after years of not quite honing his eye lasers so the man has glasses:) transition lenses bc he thinks they're cool as fuck

• he forgets chase is trans and doesn't recognize the severity of the girly insults

- chase thinks it's funny

• he doesn't know how to film tiktoks so he makes chase help him (again he doesn't mind it)

• he likes fnaf:)

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

I need to kill the part of my brain that complains “boo that interest is CRINGE” when I have interests weirder than computer viruses.

anyway in the interest of being brave, once upon a time I made a Bluey OC. Her name is Caramel and I love her. I haven’t rly written or drawn anything for her in months, so I feel less embarrassed talking about her.

She was made partially for me to think through how access needs would be different for a nonverbal autistic child in an accepting environment. The Onesies episode in season 3 introduced Brandy, who was implied to have infertility issues, so it made sense to me to have her adopt Caramel and introduce her character into the canon universe that way. I liked researching different AAC options and how they would be implemented for someone her age in her environment, and how the AAC would evolve over time to keep up with her needs. I planned for her to have some basic Auslan signs mastered, and a physical AAC device which was a binder with pages of cards, as well as an alphabet page. Think like a Pokémon card binder, but for index cards, so words could be swapped out or reorganized easily.

I planned out an episode where Bluey and Bingo would meet Caramel, and learn about accessibility devices and respecting boundaries. The episode would be called “Picture Book” or smth along those lines. Bluey and Bingo would meet Caramel and Brandy at a park, but Chilli would have a talk with them first about Caramel. Smth along the lines of “Caramel doesn’t talk the same way you do, but we still need to listen with our eyes and ears”.

Bluey would see Caramel using her binder to request a toy (she has a physical AAC device at this point of the canon; I planned for her to switch to an electronic one later). Bluey would get excited about the binder, and want to touch it, and Caramel would get upset but not be able to communicate why, bc Bluey wouldn’t be paying attention to what Caramel was saying. Bluey would understand that Caramel was upset, and want to make amends, but Caramel would avoid her.

The next day, Chilli would teach Bluey and Bingo a new game called Picture Book. In the game, Chilli has “cast a spell” on Bluey so she can’t talk, but Bingo has a “secret magic item” to help Bluey talk anyway. The magic item is a clearly homemade book with pictures of items Bluey uses and some locations, as well as a “yes” and “no”. Chilli and Bingo would respond to Bluey pointing to the pictures as if she were talking.

Bandit would get home, see Bluey and Bingo playing, and ask them what they wanted for dinner. Bluey would point to one food, but Bingo would say something else, and Bandit would assume Bluey wanted it, too. He would ask why Bluey wasn’t talking, but Bluey wouldn’t have the words in her book to respond. He would try to play Bluey’s book to play keep-away. This would repeat a few times, before Bluey would get frustrated and say “why aren’t you listening to me!” Bandit would apologize, and say he didn’t realize Bluey needed her book, but Bluey would still be upset.

And then Chilli would debrief with Bluey, saying smth like

“Dad wasn’t really listening with his eyes and ears, was he?”

“No, he wasn’t”

“Did you want to talk to Dad with your book?”

“Well, yeah, but he wouldn’t look at my book!”

“Right. And did you want to play with Dad when he wouldn’t listen to you?”

“Well… no, not really.”

“How did you feel when Dad took your book away?”

“Bad.”

“Do you think Caramel felt the same way when you tried to touch her book?”

“Ohhhhh. She probably felt bad, too. But I don’t know how to say sorry.”

“That’s okay. We can always try again tomorrow.”

The next morning, Bluey and Bingo would go to the park again, and Caramel would already be there playing with Brandy. She would be sorting wood chips by color or smth; a type of play that would be more “stereotypically autistic” but something she enjoyed. Caramel would hide when she saw Bluey, but Bluey would sit down and apologize for taking Caramel’s picture book, and show her the homemade picture book from yesterday. Slowly, Caramel would stop hiding and go back to playing, and Bluey and Bingo would join in, watching what Caramel did and joining in once they understood the pattern. The episode would resolve there.

There would be more episodes showing how Caramel had different access needs and accommodations due to her disability, but how she was still a kid who liked to play and learn her own way. She would have her own special interests. I wanted to write her as having low to moderate support needs and being nonverbal.

Anyway u can tell I’ve put a lot of thought into this slfkglsjsnkfkfksjsjfkfmsnbd

[aspiring-artist-em]

soo my Bestie showed me ur ao3 acc and fem!au and I saw that people asks u some questions well if u don't mindI want too. It's such a good job btw I love it. So I was thinking about why it's just genderswitch wolfstar but not Jamie and Pete? Like how they even became in group? I mean like little pre-teen boys James & Pete might be embarrassed to share something like secret with Sirius because all these "she's a girl" stereotypes. And I think Remus don't mind but Sirius was brought up not to discuss her "personaly" life and her "feminine problems" with anyone cause it's shame and here James falls on her head and all that. AND I probably lost the thought line– hope you're understand lol

Thank you!!! I really love the fact that u like it, because it means that I have to be doing something right lmao. As for ur questions, do NOT feel bad about asking them, they make me think about the world I created more in depth and work out the details yk?

so I get what ur saying, I did wolfstar bc I wanted to write lesbian wolfstar but didn't wanna deal with gender swapping everyone (quite a hassle for my small brain to deal with), they met in the hogwarts express and I would like to think they James and Pete think that Sirius and Remus are "not like other girls, they're cool, they don't care about makeup or girly things they just wanna play pranks" (they don't portray themselves like that, it's just like, oh they're an exception bc of the pranks etc). The big problems don't start to arise until Sirius is 14 and by then they have 3-4 years of friendship behind them. James doesn't know the extent to everything, like at all. He's a little clueless as to what's going on in her head, all James and Pete know is something happened, Sirius isn't the same but we need to stick by her bc Gryffindor loyalty. She doesn't tell them, they're in the dark and like, just witnessing her trauma responses. Sirius asks james what happens when she's not all there but she never really tells him much yk? James and Sirius are platonic soulmates in my mind, no matter the gender, and they're best friends and so there's more trust extended to him yk? Sorry my brain is scattered, I had to wake up early for work, but like, I hope u get the idea.

Again, thank u so much for reading, im still writing part 10 and idk what to write but my brain is starting to work again lol

[butterflyeffectiveless]

rambling, random, ship

I have no idea why i am talking about this but had random impulse to say anything. I don’t think what i’ll be saying is actually what I believe in, maybe it’s a random thing, my mind is always wandering. Maybe some people will judge me but i no longer care tbh.

Reasons why I ship Ludoffee:

- Nostalgia. Perhaps my longing for old days and that ships takes me closer to those days that felt better back then. Pretty much personal selfish thing. It’s like keeping an old stuffed animal from childhood , to give the analogy.

- Both are villains whose stories were not fullly realized in canon.

- A cool composed and self-restrained man in a suit likes a short and emotional awkward guy - it’s kind of cute. (ok not “kind of”.. deep down I like this dynamic because that difference is kind of wholesome)

- Many ways to explore the dynamic in unusual ways (aka the “stereotyped as incompetent” guy turns out to be more emotionally mature in ways the cool guy isnt and can do great things which impresses the “cool” guy)

- Its pretty much Venomous and Boxman but as monsters.. (if they were not the way they were in canon)

- There was a lot of canon detail in season 1 (confirmed liking from Ludo toward Toffee. But uh, it wasn’t actually great tbh (including Ludo’s attitude; if Toffee were not manipulative and geniunely worked for him Ludo would be the problematic one I feel))

___

I kinda ship Eclipsafee, but the reason I do is probably because I thought that Eclipsa would date him and her personality would go in interesting ways with his. It’s also kind of a “sweet x goth” dynamic which is like a blueprint for a cool ship (”is toffee the goth and Eclipsa is sweet or Eclipsa is sweet and Toffee is goth?” - yes) .

- They Both give off a vibe “cool uncle or aunt”. Both are grown adults who seem mature (but aren’t)

- Making up their banter and dialogue would be fun (one is gloomy and other is sassy)

- A “used to know each other in teens years and met again years later and found out how much they changed” dynamic is cool. + Potential for writing: changes caused them to develop new perspectives on one another.

- Dark purple + dark purple

- Eclipsa could bond with Toffee because she was seen as monster too

- A dynamic where they don’t end up together because Eclipsa has her true love Globgor sounds interesting as well. All hail lone Toffee (a cool mysterious man in a suit who is not married and is single and likes it that way but sometimes stares at a lady he used to love and her husband being happy.). Also it’d be bittersweet to headcanon (in an au, Not canon) that Eclipsa does have some feelings for Toffee despite her living her new life fully.

__ Moontoffee

I used to avoid it at all costs for reasons i have already said in past. Mainly bc of second had embarrassment and fear that it will sink. But after everything ended I felt more free in trying to look at it.

- I wouldnt ship them as a royal Butterfly family but I would ship them as rivals from different peoples who stayed that way but somehow changed their views on one another.

- I would rather ship them in an au where Toffee didn’t kill Moon’s mother. But still.. I may be hated for this but I’ve seen dynamics where one character killed other’s parent and still at the end they made amends and worked out as a team. So I don’t know. I understand that in Moon’s case her mother’s death greatly affected her and I have hard time seeing her ever forgiving that so its better to make an au where Toffee had nothing to do with it.

- The fact that Toffee can be drawn in Moon’s color palette is kind of sus.. Their palettes are almost the same..

- I always liked to associate Toffee with the moon (not Moon Butterfly but.. moon, the moon) and water. And knowing that water is associated with the moon, it feels almost symbolic in my imagination that he would look interesting with Moon (even as a platonic duo)

- They are.. pretty similar (both are leaders who are ready to become the devil for their own people and who want to keep their status at all costs). Also in canon they turned into less likable characters at the end.

- Funny headcanon of mine: Many monsters liked to call Toffee “Moony” and that caused a lot of confusion and some monsters ( and Toffee  as well ) thought they mockingly called him after Moon Butterfly - a princess they all hated. But in reality “Moony” among monsters means “Lunatic who is dependant on the moon”, so they mockingly called him a lunatic who is obsessed with Moon (by obsession I mean that Toffee couldnt let go of resentment and remembered what Moon did to him)

“Oh hello general Moony”

“It’s Toffee. I am Not like that mewman princess”

“No, I dont mean Moon. I mean Moony.”

- In all honesty I dont want to ship them in canon universe. I’d ship them if they were not as violent to one another and had to unite against greater threat. (i.e. they both disagreed with their bosses and superiors and bonded over that. Also a nice potential for them changing their views on each others’ kind and learning that the other is not evil)

- I think I would ship them platonically, as friends. Enemies to friends. It’s kind of hard for me to imagine them as a romantic pair who’d caress another’s cheek.

[fullonfandomindulgence]

unfortunately in my heart of hearts i think if one had stronger anatomy skills hed do more fanservice. i em very sorry for this thought. but... cmon. you feel me

i always kinda liked the (few) traditional fanservice situations in the one-illustrated stuff bc it removed any visual titillation for the reader. the narrative seemed to be trying to communicate that those moments were kinda gross and embarrassing, as they would be in real life for the women and girls being leered at.

but the murata adaptation of one punch man, my god. i mean i appreciate the bits where the men are sexualized too, but cmon. not exactly the same diversity of fits and bodytypes. that one frikken ninja character whos all swathed in these badass loose robes and then she gets slashed at and all her clothes fall off.

and really looking at the tatsumaki vs saitama fight in the original one punch man, when her skirt's going all over the place you coulda just made her bottoms black. just not defined them against the rest of her outfit, which is already just a big black shape. it probably woulda looked cooler. but instead theyre white in like this uncritical perpetuation of the trope, no one in-story comments or seems to notice, just the idea that we can see her underwear is supposed to be the titillating thing i guess, despite that being out of tone with the rest of the scene.

i love that the kids in mob psycho are allowed to be kids without the art leering at them, but i have the uneasy feeling that there might be more leering if one had the technical chops for it. and thats kind of a silly thing to think about, like thats not whats on the page, and more than that one so rarely puts characters in situations for fanservice to even happen. like the utter lack of anything happening between tome and origo in the reigen manga is so so good. generally ones stories are almost sexless. but still, every once in a while, that uneasy feeling comes back up. idk! idk.

tbh i dont watch a lot of anime, i know this shit is small potatoes compared to the dreck that gets put out by some people, probably the whole mob psycho crew deserves credit for not falling into those common tropes. but think its important to allow discussion of this stuff. i fukken love mob psycho and i have a lot of respect for one as an artist but that doesnt mean i think hes a perfect smol creacher or that the work is beyond criticism. i mean fucking puri puri prisoner??? fucking disgusting, just the most regressive-ass stereotype, miss me so hard with that shit. and darkshine? the dude in claw with the lips??

thats a harsh note to end on but it needs be said. anyway. would love to hear other ppls takes on this, idk, im just Really Into mob psycho, and i like engaging with it even in ways that dont cast the work in positive lights. does any of what im saying even make sense? who am i to say. but cmon! you feel me??

[cheesecake-beech]

I just wanna know what if the vicious 6 was in a relationship (I cant think of any)

Like, w another member o the group, or like, a y/n character? Or just WHAT IF they were in a relationship w someone?

But here are some for IF they were in a relationship, w like. someone, or a y/n character

long post lmao

this was super fun to write lmfao

Belle- Doesn't make it obvious that she's in a relationship. At first anyway. Her lover would probably have to have a high profile, like her, or live up to her standards. OR- worship her, like, smother her in compliments just to SAY "yeah I'm dating Belle 🤠" Like, in a smooth fucker way. Like her side piece just to make her look good lmfao, Don't worry they'd probably get to hold her hand while attending some event in public. That'd awarding enough 🤠🤠🤠

simp If they were upset, she'd probably let them cry into her lap while petting their head. Probably calling them some kind of pet name to try and calm them down. bc crying is annoying DFSHGSHDGJSHGJ/hj

Jean- He'd probably be really awkward, in public. Or around the team w them. But in private he'd make corny flirtatious comments, hold them by the waist do that French "hon hon hon mon amour" and say some sappy lovey dovey shit like that hgfhasgfjdshgf and like, give you roses, some French stuff like that He's every French stereotype when it comes to love This man panics anytime he sees them upset, he doesn't know if it was his fault, or something he did/said, or if it's just a bad day, But once he gets calmed down he'll calmly ask whats wrong, give them a warm embrace and let them vent

Sven- THIS BOI, this himbo, he will SMOTHER them in hugs n' cuddles every chance he gets, he will probably be skating and ZOOM IN out of nowhere and sneak up behind them, just to pick them up to hug. He's probably one to smother his face into the crook of peoples necks 2 🥺🥺 He also probably gives piggy backs if they were to ask If they were upset, Sven would also get upset be like "Oh No D:" he'd ask what happened, pick them up, wrap them up, (make them into a burrito lmao) and listen to them, let them talk. He'd listen. While he'd holding them wrapped up in the blanket.

Stronghold- ANOTHER HIMBO, this man. Gets absolutely flushed and embarrassed every time they faceplant their faces into his man tiddies. His tiddies are off limits to only them. KJEFSKSAGHDFGSFSJG He also gets embarrassed when he gets asked for cuddles. because, y'know, huge honkas. JDSHFHSADGFHSG But he likes cuddles, he likes holding others in his arms (without breaking them) If they're upset or sad, he'd probably be very hesitant to poke at it. But once he sees how sad they are, he'd probably slowly sit down next to them. Pat their head, rub their back. Just small little reassuring things until their ready to talk, or just hug (with their face in his chest dskhgfskjfdghfhgj)

Wild Knuckles- This old guy needs some love. Even if he doesn't want to admit it. Lonely™ Will proTECC them at all costs (cuz this bitch immortal like god damn). Says he doesn't need help when doing something, cracks his back the next second. They probably just sit by his fire, drinking coffee, talking about arson, books, music, idk This man hates to see them upset, but doesn't really know what to do to help, but he'll sit with them and he'll let them cry into his shoulder/lap. If they're hurt, THIS GRANDPA WILL FKING MURDER WHOEVER HURT THEM/srs then he'll make u some tea

Nunchuck- She's to holy for that

[muppeted]

3, 10 and 13 for the book asks!

ahhh tysm for asking! I’m putting this under a read more bc i got a lil out of control lmao

3. what are your top 5 books of the year?

ok I’m planning on making a separate post w my top 10 2022 releases so consider this list like. my top 5 books I read this year that were NOT released in 2022. if that makes sense. in no particular order:

-the inheritance trilogy by nk jemisin—putting an entire series as one book may be cheating BUT. also me recommending jemisin is very like. hey, did y’all know that one of the most acclaimed sf writers of our generation is uhhh….really fucking good? but oh my god she is.

-the book of atrix wolfe by patricia a mckillip—was reading this when I found out mckillip had passed away, which made for an extra emotional experience. her writing is so, so beautiful, and has had such an impact on the way I write (ok, try and mostly fail to write)/think about fantasy. this is a great standalone from her, about ghosts and curses and the magic of kitchens.

-the singing hills cycle by nghi vo—this is just like. everything I want from a series of linked fantasy novellas. if that makes sense. Like I’m such a sucker for books where the frame narrative is someone going around collecting stories, and the stories vo tells are so real, feel deeply embedded in history and mythology, love and rage. and, ofc, also very very queer and hot (who among us has not wanted to be semi-abducted by beautiful morally ambiguous tiger lady).

-ghost summer by tananarive due—one of the things I love abt due is her stories work SO well read aloud—levar burton’s podcast featured one of the stories from this book and it was such a good ep, I really recommend seeking it out. listening to her read at an event I attended a couple years ago was also amazing—the entire audience was like so tense and so with her for the entire story, it was great. another thing I love about this collection is that at the end of each story she gives some context around the writing of the story—it’s fun! I think more authors should do this w their short story collections!

-peter darling by sa chant—yes it is embarrassing that it’s taken me this long to read this. but I did! finally! and I did cry !

ok actually going through the list I cried while reading 4/5 of these despite the fact that none of them are like. stereotypical cry-y books. which could mean 1) i love books that make me cry or 2) i just cried a lot this year. probably both

10. what was your favorite new release of the year?

gonna say it’s a tie between the daughter of doctor moreau by silvia moreno-garcia and the hurting kind by ada limon. I just finished the hurting kind so that might make me a lil biased but limon is one of my all time favorite poets and this collection peeled me like an orange so ! (is that a phrase? is that something ppl say? icr)

And then the second daughter of dr Moreau was announced I was like I’m going to love this and then I did. reworking SF classics is just so completely my shit and moreno-garcia does it sososososo well. really recommend watching island of lost souls (the 1932 adaptation) right before watching this, they pair together perfectly (it;s like, one takes this base story and does something mostly shitty but still kind of fascinating/intriguing with it, and the other takes this base story and turns it into something incredible).

13. what were your least favorite books of the year?

Listen. I read so many bad romance novels this year. also a lot of really really good romance novels but. so many bad ones. i don’t want to like name names but here is a vague list:

-romance that was literally just ted lasso but ALSO the author was originally a het romance writer who had never written gay before so the sex scenes were like ‘he put his thingy in my thingy’ and it’s like maam. this is not my immortal. either say hole or leave.

-tiktok popular book that was EXTREMELY badly-written (yes this happened 3 times. it will probably happen again. I’m not even on tiktok--i’d see some non-tiktok person rec it also so i’d be like oh then it must be good ! and it never was. idk i am Charlie Brown and tiktok is lucy holding the football)

-started reading a fantasy romance and was intrigued by the premise and then they described the love interest and I was like ‘oh. this is just fantasy k*lo ren.’ i have like zero feelings on k*lo ren he just is not sexy to me so it always took me out of it and made me put the book down. also I don’t even think the books themselves were r*ylo or republished fanfic or anything I think the authors just think that character/actor is sexy. which is fine. i just am not personally into that. this also happened twice

[hopelessromanticstrawberry]

unboxing sexual trauma part 2–

So I haven’t spoken abt the indirect sexual abuse like, having old men leer at me, being cat called every time I walked to school when I was 8 years old. it was constant, I started to wear boys clothes and didn’t want to be a girl anymore even though I loved pink and cute things and I loved being girly.

The actual direct abuse, alright.

So I had that first bad relationship that ended my freshman year, dated an 18 year old next when I was 15. He was some nerdy music theater guy, stubborn, and prone to insulting — think stereotypical Boston family, like he moved to my city later on in life. We’d play videogames together, but honestly without choir and theater we had virtually nothing in common. But I liked feeling like someone loved me, and he was mean to everyone but me which made me feel special. He also was short, unintimidating, and funny. He wasn’t attractive to me, but I figured I wanted a nice guy who cares about looks didn’t Marge Simpson love Homer? yeah. The damage psychologically was already done. Things ended bc we had no chemistry and I still held out for 3 months of dating, he also saw my severe self harm scars and cried. We broke up shortly after I told him I had some trauma around sex and wanted to take things slow. He told me his last girlfriend cheated on him too. We probably were better off friends anyways, when we kissed it felt like I was kissing a family member on the cheek. Like zero sparks.

I don’t know why I included that ^^^ but im sharing a lifetime of my bullshit right now so bear with me

The next guy I dated was pretty quickly, he’d been an outlier on my big friend group since middle school. I was such a sucker for shojo like anime tropes. He had pined after me for years, given me gifts and always praised me. I thought he looked like a troll. He ended up working out and clearing his acne a little, he grew a little taller (still only like 5’6 but im 5’1) he started dressing a little nicer and being less whiny. He liked anime, I liked anime, he said he liked gaming (but usually I was the one hijacking his Skyrim account and gaming all night bc he didn’t actually game), we both did choir and he conveniently was always around to help. Finally my junior year I was 16, this was the age id always told myself I wanted to lose my v card. I didn’t want to wait too long bc then it would be an even bigger deal, my friends were losing theirs, I didn’t want to be like the weird one. I also started smoking weed and drinking a little bit, starting to go to parties and join social circles more legitimately. I also was more attractive, most everyone forgot the “shitty lay” and “she’s pregnant” rumors from freshman year. People weren’t so mean to me and the popular boys were starting to ask me out, I genuinely thought they were joking I was so defensive and id be a mean bitch. It felt good to be cruel to the people who were cruel to me. Lowkey it’s embarrassing but I gave tsundere vibes and I was proud of it, I felt cool for being one of the only kids smoking weed and id come to school late and stoned every day. One of the people who smoked me up for the first time was abusive ex 2, id originally planned to do all this stuff with a hotter friend but he went to a different school and we couldn’t coordinate. Ugly abusive ex 2 was my chemistry tutor so i had a handful of late FaceTimes and study halls with him. Then abusive ex 2 started to take me on dates, smoke me out, he spent like $50-100 every week taking me out and doing things with me, it was textbook lovebombing but to me I just thought he was trying to impress me after wanting me for so long.

Smugly, I brought up that id wanted to try sex with a friend just to get it out of the way. He was a virgin, I liked that, and he had an objectively bigger dick than I would’ve expected. Still never got much experience to know where it fell on a scale but yeah. I wanted no strings attached. I was the first to give a blowjob, it was kinda weird but not terrible. He came in like 30 seconds. But when it was his turn to go down on me bc he obviously wanted more, he made a stank face when he saw my pussy (an outie) and commented that I didn’t shave (just trimmed) before I could react he jams a finger in roughly, and tries to finger blast me like they do in porn while grossly licking everywhere but the clit. He didn’t like to eat pussy and told me every time after if I asked… I bled and it lasted maybe 3 or 5 minutes before he asked if I came. I said “I don’t know” and shakily got dressed. He reassured me we would learn to have better sex, I felt gross and regretted my choice. But then he doubled down on the gifts, on letting me crash at his house (my home life was chaotic to say the least), always getting me takeout or Starbucks or whatever I asked for every day, he gave me a big chunk of weed in a heart shaped jar and never told me no. My friends started to comment and how romantic it was and how I should give him a chance, he’s a nice guy. We had mid tier oral sex and smoked weed every day after school, I told him I didn’t want to have penetrative sex for a while and he was actually ok with it. When I was drunk on prom night we ended up having penetrative sex, it hurt and sucked and lasted about 1 minute. I felt dirty and weird after. I drunkenly took my makeup off and wondered if everyone enjoyed sex bc I didn’t think I did. I can’t tell you when it turned volatile exactly but he was porn brained, once we started having sex sex he told me about his kinks and we would try them, unsafely with no safe word, no foreplay, no after cuddles. I felt like a sex toy, and by this point id moved in full time because my parents didn’t want me at home. I don’t think I had a real orgasm the entire time, maybe a few times when I didn’t look at his face and fantasized about other men/women. Then he started to like slap me without warning in sex, or choke me incorrectly while my face turned purple. It was like violent things were the only things he could get off too. I felt like I was complacent but curious, I’d explore being “kinky”, is this what that was? We had such frequent aggressive sex, i had such low esteem just to feel desired made me tolerate a lot more than I should’ve. He started calling me a bitch and then the disrespect trickled into our real life as soon as I moved in. He knew I was more or less powerless and I didn’t have the esteem to leave. He would nit pick everything about me, and on top of that he was gross! I would tell him to stop being such a pig and a slob but he just told everyone I was a nag. Him and his alcoholic mom would gang up on me when he and I argued. I remember wanting to leave and every time I did the love bombing would continue, I wanted to be loved so badly… he would have sex with me when I was too fucked up to say yes, he would get off to me crying or gagging or choking, he liked to hit me. He liked anal sex. He liked calling me a bitch and being extremely rough. This was like… my only sex experiences so far. Then the rumors are that im kinky, im daddy issues, im slutty … it didn’t feel good and i felt trapped. I thought i had no other place to turn.

While a lot of those things could be considered sexual coercion rape (like anytime he was horny he expected sex and would threaten to kick me out if I didn’t) the times he actually raped me were terrible.

One time when we had argued at his house and i broke up with him he overpowered me in a physical fight ripped my clothes off and started fucking me, I went numb. Dissociated so hard I stayed the night just staring at the wall. He locked me in his room and wouldn’t let me leave many times, he told everyone I was crazy and left me with very few friends

He asked for anal and I said ok let’s try, he wasn’t gentle and he didn’t stop when I said no or slow down. He just kept fucking me roughly, it was like he got off to me hurting, similarly the first time we did anal the same thing happened except he used tingling lube that made it burn all the worse. My asshole tore and bled every time.

Made me blow him for 40+ minutes until my knees bled from the rough floor

He was having sex with me and I wanted to stop, he choked me until I was losing consciousness and slapped me until my ears were ringing not even hitting my face but the side of my ear. He said it was hot when I cried.

I had taken xanax and fallen asleep in bed, I had taken very strong triple pressed Xanax and it might have been the first time I did it. Although I’ve done xans since and even after a year long break wasn’t this fucked up. Idk if it was laced but anyways. I was out and couldn’t wake up. He started fucking me while I was drugged, I said no no no and tried to push him weakly. It felt like knives in my vagina, I was wet with blood bc I was dry when he started jamming it in. I kept blacking in and out I said no stop no. He came in me. I woke up in a puddle of cum and blood. My shirt was torn my panties missing. I couldn’t believe if it was real I felt like throwing up, dry heaved and nothing came out bc I didn’t eat for days. It hurt to pee, I had to strain. I still have to focus to pee now. Blood was on the tissue paper after. I immediately took a Xanax I couldn’t handle processing what happened, I didn’t have another place to stay for the next 2 weeks. I didn’t want to ask for help. I don’t remember much of that week I was doing so many drugs to numb the pain, he fucked me other times but I didn’t feel it or react. I wasn’t in my own body. I wasn’t even me anymore I was so damaged by the experience. Paralyzed. I ended up dumping him at a coffee shop during winter break, he violently raped me maybe two weeks prior. I’d spent time with my friends and out of state family mentally preparing to dump him. He said it was cool bc he wanted to fuck other girls anyways. I felt dirty and used up. I’d just let this ugly troll man abuse me for years, we were together for 2 years.

A week later I dropped out of school, partied every night, moved into a trap house, started dating my current bf I’ve been with for 6 years now.