#he’s not really picky about which brand he eats

[always-a-slut-4-ghouls]

My cat one hour after his lunch, yelling at me: mother I am hungry I am starving how dare you let your child go hungry 😾 I am but a poor victorian street urchin and you have left me out to die

[artytaeh]

a honorary thought about how theodore nott would be with you, mrs. nott, his wife— during those blessed first vacations as a married couple; your honeymoon.

warnings: includes smut, so obviously it's advised for +18 readers; read at your own risk. use of italian provided by google translator, if i have readers who speak italian fluently, please don't murder me! </3

honeymoon!theo who seems extremely relaxed, calm and unprepared for this first vacation with you as his wife, to italy— his home country. what you don't know is that theodore had been thinking and planning these weeks for months, maybe even years, during those mornings at hogwarts that he woke up before he needed to leave his bed and prepare for classes. unbeknownst to you, theodore is prepared to suggest names for your future children: that's how well theo has thought (and planned) for a future with you.

honeymoon!theo who doesn't give you much context or details over what you'll be doing during those weeks; you know that it'll be in italy, and got some advice over which clothes would be a good idea to bring in your luggage. if you expected one week of vacation— yeah, dolcezza, not happening. italy is a beautiful country; given the opportunity to show you around, theodore will make sure that his family's money is put to good use, and ensure at least three weeks of walking around.

honeymoon!theo who has most of the days planned; he made sure that three weeks was enough time to see part of italy's best spots, yet never giving you one day that makes you feel exhausted. at most, you'll see or visit three different places during the same day, yet not far enough that'll get your feet hurting from walking too much.

honeymoon!theo who had a hard time selecting where to take you during these three weeks— at the same time that he wants you to see how lively, colorful and amazing his homeland is, theodore doesn't want to have you exhausted in a matter of days. in the end, theo decided that he'd give you the best of two worlds: the beautiful cities, and the breathtaking countryside.

honeymoon!theo who makes sure that you'll have a taste of most of italy's native dishes. desserts, treats, appetizers, dinner and even drinks; theodore makes it a point to show you why he slandered hogwarts' food on a daily basis. however, if you're a picky eater or have a few food limitations, theo makes sure to only encourage you to eat what he knows that you'll like. never forces you to taste anything that you might not like, should it have any ingredient that you don't eat / don't like.

honeymoon!theo who will buy a slice of pizza, a cup of pasta or other treats as you stroll around the streets, making sure that you taste some of them and are never the slightest bit hungry.

honeymoon!theo who teached you a few sentences and phrases in italian, helping you with the pronounciation just right. simple things, really, like petnames, simple phrases (how to say thank you, how to say hello and good morning, even a few curse words should someone be a jerk to you and because you cursing on his native language turns him on).

honeymoon!theo who refers to you as mrs. nott. if you're at a restaurant— theodore will be a gentleman and make the order for the two of you, saying what he'd like to have, and what mrs. nott chose instead for today's meal. will teasingly refer to you as mrs. nott, if you ever engage playful banter or have a silly argument. if you're angry, well, being called mrs. nott dissolves any annoyance that you might have towards your husband.

honeymoon!theo who takes the chance of being in italy again, to buy his favorite brands of cigarettes; he promises to smoke a little less, though. one in the morning, as he waits for you to finish dressing up for the day— then one at night, leaving the windows open after you two were intimate, as you are comfortably laying on his chest. one hand holds the cigarette, while the other runs its fingers through your hair; here, theodore has each hand holding two of his biggest addictions. surely, if possible, theodore might sneak one cigarette during afternoon or after lunch; if you don't like the smell, theo will make sure to do it away from you. is there a shop you'd like to check? while you explore it, theo might smoke his second cigarette of the day.

honeymoon!theo who never gets his hands out of you. waist, lower back, holding hands or intertwined fingers; now that you're his, he has even less reasons to let go of you. italy is a crowded, famous country for vacations; between locals and tourists you walk together, as theodore guides you along, making sure that he never loses sight or hold of his wife.

honeymoon!theo that has a morning routine; lazying around in bed for a little longer, forearms feeling the softness of the pillow as he rests his head there— prompted up enough to see you. his gaze never wavers; theodore watches as you walk around the bedroom, each step being a soft pad on the floor, as you rummage through the wardrobe and seek for what you'll wear today; making your way then to the bathroom. if he's too sleepy, theo will take a light nap as he waits for you, lulled by the muffled sound of the water running for your shower; should he feel a bit more energetic, or more of a morning person, theo will follow you like a puppy, hugging your waist from behind as he kisses his way to shower with you.

honeymoon!theo who decides that his vocation is to help mrs. nott, his stunning, gorgeous wife getting ready for anything. oh, so you're preparing yourself to sleep? theodore will be more than happy to brush your hair, or to have you teaching him what products to apply, and how, to your hair— are you too lazy to take off your make-up? don't worry, theo does it for you; and even throws a dirty joke about removing your make-up in another, more elaborate and definitely much more pleasant, way. specially after a long day strolling around the streets, theodore will be more than happy to just let you relax, while he takes care of you.

honeymoon!theo who also loves to help you getting ready to leave, too. do you need this thing from the wardrobe or from your luggage? don't worry, he'll get it for you. are these the shoes you're wearing tonight? sit on the bed, bella, i'll tie them for you. do you need him to hold something or even help you with your hair? theodore nott is a very competent husband (or does his best to learn how to be very helpful for you). if you don't need help, well, theodore will sit on the edge of the bed, with those icy blue eyes gaining a new loving shade, as he looks at his bellissima getting ready to leave the room with him.

honeymoon!theo who took you to some window shopping with you, at venice and milan. two beautiful cities, where people proudly dress to impress; the shops didn't disappoint you at all. each dress or mannequin that you stared for more than two seconds got theodore to hold you by the hand, and gently dragging you to enter the shop; theo was more than happy to hold bags for you, one arm wrapped around your waist, while the other proudly holds his wife's bags from all the stuff you bought (correction: what theodore persuaded you to bring along, strictly using his family's money).

honeymoon!theo who perfected the art of convincing mrs. nott to agree with allowing him to spoil her; why shouldn't you be pampered by your own husband? in fact, theodore argues that doing so is a significant other's duty (and privilege). should you argue that everything's too expensive, well, theodore has two valid arguments for that: one, the nott family is ridiculously wealthy— one dress won't make his wallet lighter; and two, it's your money too, now. so why shouldn't you use it?

🗯️ : but teddy, darling— this is too much. i won't have enough space in my luggage to take all of these extra clothes with me.

t : don't worry about that, carina. if anything, we'll buy an extra luggage for you. fanculo, you know what? let's buy you a bigger one so you'll have to buy more things to fill it up. here, cara mia, look at this shop.

honeymoon!theo who takes a few nights to take you to dance around with him, strolling around some streets with good bars— a fancier version of those slytherin parties that you went together, except the lack of excessive green, besides lorenzo and mattheo's tendencies to start a brawl over flirting with an already taken girl. theodore dances with you, the two of you swaying with the rhythm, having the most fun, as you try to talk to each other sometimes or exchange a few comments here and there. if a younger guy has the audacity to look at you, theodore will glare at them in such an intimidating way, that the bloke doesn't even have to know about how theodore nott was a feared rival at hogwarts; should he be older, theodore will yell a clear threat in italian.

t : guarda ancora mia ragazza e ti garantisco che nessuno incontrerà i tuoi occhi dopo che li avrò cavati davanti a tutta la tua famiglia, stronzo del cazzo.

🗯️ : theo, what was that? what did you say? i didn't understand...

t : nothing, dolcezza; would you like a drink? here, let's go buy one together.

honeymoon!theo who translates anything and everything to you, specially if you ask him. if you're at a museum and would like to know what the description of some painting is, then theodore will explain or straight-out translate for you. don't worry, he's more than happy to do that— theo does it so patiently, that you would notice that he actually enjoys it. maybe he's returning the favor, for those few times that you've helped him pronounce a few words before class starts; maybe because theodore finds it heartwarming how you show such interest for his culture, and how endearing it is to see you trying to understand a few words here and there.

honeymoon!theo who separated these few days strolling around the city, walking around the streets and seeing a few attractions that he knew that you'd like (a few museums, for example); and got you to another city, one where he planned to have a more lighthearted routine. summer in italy is hot; to have you not enjoying the heat with one day or two to tan, to enjoy a pool or simply lazying around would be wrong; a waste, even. during those days, theodore made sure to let you rest on your chair, while massaging the sunscreen into your skin. those few days spent like that were fun; you didn't do much, but sometimes, doing nothing is the best.

honeymoon!theo who got to drink a few cocktails with you during those few days, sunglasses shielding your sights from the blazing sun, and swimsuits ready to have at least a swim together. conversation flows as easily between you as ever; taking a sip of your cocktail while the other talks, taking turns to share opinions or to continue the conversation. perhaps theodore took the chance to lightheartedly discuss what you'd do after these weeks— would you like to live with him to nott's estate, and leaving your shared cozy apartment for the time being?

honeymoon!theo who would only not shower with you if you two really had to get ready as fast as possible. otherwise, he's joining you; kissing your shoulders while you wash yourself, hugging your waist as he hums to whatever you're telling him. unless you'd rather wash your own hair or have a specific way of doing it, then theodore is more than happy to do it for you; as soon as he's done, he'll poke your nose with your shampoo's foam, signaling his concluded work. surely, theodore marvels at having you hugging him and washing his back at the same time— hey, where are you going? no, hug him for a little bit more; his back should be properly washed, you know?

honeymoon!theo who finds these weeks blissful. no quickies, no hurries; contrary to hogwarts, that even your own dorms weren't the most private places; or your daily life, where some of his friends are comfortable enough to visit without invitations— here at the hotel or alugada house you're at, there's privacy, time, and no restrictions for noise.

honeymoon!theo who takes his time with you. taking each piece of clothing with a calm movement, kissing every inch of skin in display; making sure that tomorrow morning, you'll have to complain or pout at him, due to those new bruises his lips will leave on your skin. neck and thighs are two favorites of his; however, there's something sinfully attractive and arousing about marking up your chest. a little dirty secret of his, one that only his eyes are allowed to see— besides yours, of course.

honeymoon!theo who gets a little insane in the head each. single. time that you have the audacity to speak italian to him, specially during these intimate moments. it doesn't matter if your pronounciation isn't perfect— even a single amore does things to him. whisper fanculo a me to his ear, and you might have to choose a more lighthearted agenda tomorrow, for the sake of your sore legs.

honeymoon!theo who becomes impossibly possessive. having been an overprotective boyfriend at times, making sure that each single student and their mothers knew that you're taken for life, these few weeks are feral. it becomes calmer as the days pass by, though; theodore takes some time to normalize the overwhelming reality that finally, finally you are his wife— mrs. nott.

so, honeymoon!theo who doesn't shut up. theodore needs to tell you how long he's waited for this, to have that ring on your finger; that same hand that he holds as he thrusts into you, or pleasures you in anyway— thumb tracing over the piece of jewelry exchanged on that day that you two got married. his fingers intertwine with yours, blue eyes bewitched by the sight of you under him, and even more intensely if you go on top. theodore nott is a shameless man; he'll only encourage you to moan louder for him, to tell him how good he makes you feel. theodore nott is so, so shameless, that he won't hold back any moan, any groan, anything he wants to say; this man will continue his rambling over how long he's dreamt about putting a ring on your finger, about being wed to you, about showing you his homeland— he'd say all of his in italian, though. if you're lucky, you'll catch up a few words; if not, well, theodore's voice sounds even better when he speaks his native language so fluently.

honeymoon!theo who doesn't have to hold back his baby fever anymore. will get you that final orgasm, with you sitting on his lap, his cock deep inside you, your back flushed against his warm chest; your hips feel those calloused, warm hands holding your hips down, making sure that the two of you can see the reflection of that mirror in front of the bed— one that theodore, shamelessly, requested to have it placed there. blue eyes lock their gaze there, where he disappears inside you, as you take him so well.

honeymoon!theo who doesn't shut up as he keeps you like this for a long moment, as praises leave his lips; 'you're stunning, cara mia, davvero bellissima— you'll look even prettier with our babies inside you.' as he speaks, theo presses kisses to your neck, one hand moving to rub circles on your clit; as if he wasn't already buried so deep inside you, pressing against that spot that has your legs shaking. theo doesn't let you stray much farther from his aching erection: 'brava ragazza, you'll take it all, won't you? we can't have a single drop leave your pretty little cunt.'

honeymoon!theo who secretly hopes that you'll come back to england with a baby in your womb; as much as he absolutely adores this life with you, on getting your full attention, falling into a domestic routine— theodore can't wait to see how your child would look like. theo can only pray that they inherite your lovely smile and beautiful hair, but keep his eyes. blue eyes, identical to the ones his mother, phoena nott, had. besides, if you do end up pregnant and keep the baby— next time that you go to italy, there would be a tiny human keeping you two company. theodore daydreams about that day.

⋯ ⋯ ﹒ 🪸 ’

౨ৎ calling out my name ♡ ͡

in the summer rain, ciao amore . . .

🪻 ; . . . fandom : harry potter.

— spreading the 'theodore nott being a loving husband and slightly obsessed with the love of his life' agenda; this boy had the first draft of how your honeymoon would be after your fifth date with him.

the headers + gifs + icons aren't mine. credits to the respective creators ! 🌷

[innerfare]

Random Kid Headcanons 

Summary: A random collection of Sir Crocodile headcanons

CW: None // SFW

———

Jams to music in his workshop. Most of the time, it’s metal. Likes pop music; would rather die than admit it. Sometimes, being on the Victoria Punk feels like being in a musical. Drums with his eating utensils at meal times. Has diverted course because he heard about a rock concert on a different island than the one his crew was initially headed for. 

Pretty messy, TBH. Always has clothes strewn around his room, can never tell which ones are clean and which ones are dirty. Everything he owns has some sort of oil, grease, or lipstick stain on it. Also has lots of holes in his clothes, claims it’s grunge but really he’s just too lazy to mend them or doesn’t feel like buying replacements. 

Drinks milk, orange juice, etc. straight out of the carton and puts it back in the fridge. Also dips his grimy hands into chip and trail mix bags. And if he’s cutting bread for a sandwich, he’ll do it directly on the counter; brushes his crumbs on the floor after. 

Has used a steel scouring pad to get dried blood and oil off his skin before, and regularly uses dish soap to wash his hair. Thinks dishwasher soap and dish soap are the same thing, and that they’re the same thing as hand soap. Doesn’t know what fabric softener is. (If you decide to date this man, you will definitely have your work cut out for you; he’s a stray and it shows in his daily habits.) 

That being said, he’s very picky about cosmetics. He only uses a certain shade of eyeliner, a certain brand of lipstick, and always uses a top coat when he paints his nails. He doesn’t, however, use makeup remover, meaning he usually wakes up with raccoon eyes. 

Literally so dramatic, probably has a smoke machine somewhere on the Victoria Punk. 

Has a notorious temper (as if we don’t already know). Snaps over small things. Blames others for moving his stuff because he can never keep track of anything, only to find he was the one who did it. Will never admit to being wrong. The temper can be confusing, too, because he often shows affection by making fun of people and even punching them (granted they’re strong enough to take a friendly punch). If he yells at you, he hates you, but also, if he yells at you, he loves you- oh, and he refuses to elaborate. 

Uses his devil fruit powers to give members of his crew free piercings. Pierced Killer’s nipples after he (Killer) lost a bet. Has considered piercing his own nipples, thinks it would look sick. 

Once accidentally drank oil instead of coffee when he was working in his workshop one night because he confused the canister for his coffee mug. 

Drinks his coffee black, and not in a performative “I’m a man so I hate cream and sugar” kind of way. Genuinely enjoys his coffee black and bitter, the stronger the better. 

Has the sort of mechanical brain that just has to fix things. If someone mentions a hinge is squeaking, a piece of something broke off, etc., he’s dealing with it almost immediately. Will lose track of time trying to repair things, once without realizing spent four hours trying to fix a can opener that Killer said needed to be thrown away. Has definitely taken things apart before to figure out how they work and then not put them back together because he got distracted (has undiagnosed ADHD for sure). 

Smokes, but only ever late at night and when he’s alone. They’re his contemplative cigarettes, a little something to take the edge off and keep his hands occupied while the gears in his brain are turning. I.e., treats his late night cigarettes as a fidget spinner. 

———

Hope you enjoyed it! If you want more, you can check out my masterlist here!

[bones4thecats]

Hello! Hello!

I hope you are doing well and have had a good month so far!

So I was thinking of the candy bucket prompt where we (oc) eat too much candy with Buddha and jataka. I thought it might be funny since Buddha is a professional candy eater

🦴🍎⛓️🌕🍫🍬🍭🎃

➸ Candy-Monsters; Buddha and Jataka

Characters: Buddha and Jataka A/N: I've had a tiring month, with some issues popping their ugly heads in here and there, but overall, it's been good for the past couple days. The requests will be coming out slower than anticipated, but writing takes some time, right? Anyways, enjoy @15krixa15. ➥ Summary: A long night of candy-hunting comes to a sickening end with your husband and good-friend.

╔══════════════════════════════════════════╗

╚═════ Buddha and Jataka ═══════════════════════╝

🍭🌻 When you introduced the concept of Halloween to these two, you were shocked by how interested Jataka was. Of course, you knew Buddha would just look at you and immediately ask how much he could have

🍭🌻 It was entertaining helping the two pick out their outfits as well. You had to analyze the two of them for days to find out how they move around and how they act. With that information, you had three costumes made

🍭🌻 Buddha, was that night known as the Enlightened Rabbit, Jataka was the sweet Rose-Ringed Parakeet, and you were the beautiful Indian Peafowl. Quite the trio if I do say so myself

🍭🌻 You were out for a long while. Since Jataka and you were human spirits and Buddha was a deity, you guys could go quite some time without rest. Out of you three, Buddha, unsurprisingly, obtained the most candy

🍭🌻 He laughed as he ran inside of your home. Jataka just sighed and smiled as he followed beside you. His distant relative certainly didn't change after he passed away all those years ago

🍭🌻 Buddha had kept laughing as he sat down in one of the beanbag chairs you had in your main room, rummaging through his bucket for who knows what. Jataka waited for you to come in, like the amazing husband he was

🍭🌻 Gently unwrapping your belt that held the peacock feathers behind you, you laid the bucket of treats you gathered on the table beside the previous King's. You and Buddha knew that he wasn't going to eat as much as was brought, he didn't have a huge sweet tooth

🍭🌻 You laid the more delicate parts of your costume to the side and picked up the buckets to walk to the main room with Jataka to check in on Buddha. Both of your eyes widened to see him organizing the candies, not only by flavors, but by the brands. He may not seem like it, but he could be picky with the candy he eats

🍭🌻 Buddha narrowed his eyes as he picked up a group of the candy and unwrapped them all before plopping them all in his mouth, which shocked you. He could eat so much sugar at once without any kind of hazard. He really was a medical wonder sometimes

🍭🌻 Jataka chuckled and sat down with you, one of his arms wrapped around your waist as you reached in and began to eat some of the candies you had, occasionally handing Jataka some when you knew he'd like to have it

🍭🌻 It was only a half-hour later that Jataka was holding your hair away from your face while you leaned over the toilet. You had eaten nearly an entire container's worth of sweets, and they did not sit well in your stomach to say the least. It went from a tiny ache to puking-danger in the matter of a couple minutes

🍭🌻 Buddha was watching from the counter of the sink. In one had was your sweets, while the other was shoving them into his mouth as you emptied your stomach of every sugary-food that night

"I warned you about eating that much sugar, dear." Jataka said.

"Yeah." Buddha mumbled while chewing his food. "Besides, nobody can beat me in a candy-eating contest."

🍭🌻 You raised your head, glaring at the God with annoyance and a silent warning of if he said another word, you'd end him. Your husband smiled and gave you some words of comfort as you began to calm down from the headache-causing issue

"I still love you, Y/N."

"Love ya' too, Jataka." You smiled, making Jataka lay his head on yours.

[accio-victuuri]

IF & DOVE LIVESTREAM CLUES. 🧩

we’ve been missing our bunny laoshi for quite some time now and to have back to back livestreams from him was such a treat! and well, that new haircut! anyway, here are some sus moments from those events. this post is mostly for me who missed it and want to catch up/ archive these sweets.

for the IF livestream. i think the most glaring one is when xz said “活过来了”/ “i’m revived” related to drinking. and how it’s what wyb exactly said in exploring the unknown when he was able to finally get that first sip of coffee in the morning. well, you can say that it’s a common expression someone will use but why is it always them? and how close it was that we caught it? also the way it was natural and effortless. it’s times like this that we see their connection.

they don’t show up in front of the camera and events together but little bits like this, them adapting the other’s habits tell us what is true. i also saw one person say days ago that these two now tend to insert some english words in their sentences and i was like — oh yes. that’s true. i kinda noticed that too! even the dialect sometimes and other examples. so this incidence is just one of those. that happens when you spend a lot of time or talk to someone so often.

his clothes from acne studios, which a fave between them. yeah. they are not the only two people in this world who wear this brand but you all know we love some wardrobe similarity.

and this one he was saying how he sweats easily and that he is afraid of the summer because of it. which is not a new information cause we have seen this happen. and why he always has a fan with him. but i’m cackling how OP was relating it to that one LRLG rumor where WYB said that when XZ says it’s hot, he gets two strands of white hair. meaning that stresses him out. HAHAHAHAHA! He is too sweet. He can’t stand seeing/knowing that XZ is not comfortable.

Now let’s move on to the DOVE chocolates livestream which was so fun 🍫

the first one being ( again ) another example of a similarity. how they both like crispy things, and this is what zz commented when asked. which makes sense cause he likes potato chips among other things. as for wyb, he mentioned this when he was eating that food in ETU.

another way to interpret what wyb said was that he was only appreciating the crispiness of it and not exactly saying he prefers it. he said it himself that he is not picky with food. however i agree that this is more than enough to set off our cpn alarm bells. ugh. they are so obvious sometimes.

there was also a moment where he had to make a sentence based on a word that was given to him and what he came up with was:

we can go camping on the grassland and enjoy a relaxing time together with friend

dude i know we are all sick and tired of the camping cpn but they are not. lol. they love it so much and it gives us more sweet fuel so we have to endure 😂 and not only that — together with a friend? is this the friend from the crew? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

he used a cherry for his cupcake too! he really loves it and only put one. reminds me of that cherry cpn.

there was a challenge too where he had to blow the can to move and also push it somehow. he was so persistent! it may seem simple but that’s one characteristic they have in common. they are competitive in their own way ( okay wyb is more ) and won’t give up on challenges! fans noticed too how xz looks so young with his haircut, and how his whole aura is still so innocent and playful. that’s one thing i love about them actually. they maintain or choose that kind of wonder in the world even if it hasn’t always been kind to them.

-END.

[sunny-ssunset]

*smiles seductively and comes closer* I'm back, honey, I was really happy with the princess kenny one-shot, I was wondering if you could do something like, kyle and reader don't know each other, but they feed the same stray cat and they conventionally go to feed this cat at the same time *bites my bottom lip and and winks with my both eyes*

How i met your mother

Kyle broflovski x fem reader

divider by some random website i found on google

Masterlist!

♡Hey boo *Looks you up and down* Hope you dont mind if its fem reader (if its a problem i'll change it lol) Also genuinely sorry for how bad the princess kenny oneshot was, i was on one then. I promise this one wont be as bad *Crouches down awkwardly and worships you cuz ur a snack* (AGED UP)

"Dad??" She looked up at Kyle, beady eyed. "Yes honey" He replied, sounding a little distracted because he was serving their lunch.

"How did you meet mom?" The little girl inquired, tilting her head to the side. Kyle turns around stopping every thing hes doing and he sits at the table, as if he'd been waiting for this moment his whole life. "So there was this cat."

*Cutesy little flashback scene*

I was stopping at the corner shop as per usual, to get this certain brand of cat food. I mean, for a stray cat this one was very picky, This girl from class, was buying the same brand, I let her go first, I'm a gentleman you know how it is. As she mumbled a thanks, I grabbed a tin.

I waited in line and paid, I'm no robber, Then I walked home.

"Dad this is boring...." Patience child....

Anyways I got into the greenish house, "KYLE WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!" Jesus..... "Mom I went to the store like normal." After a long talk about safety, I went upstairs and played world of warcraft for a while then at 7 pm i grabbed the cat food and a small dish.

I left the house and walked to the park, To find the little stray kitten, but there she was lying down in all her glory. In my opinion she was starting to look less skinny, To which I of course take credit for, so i poured the cat food into the tin, But the little kitten wouldn't eat it? Then Behind her I saw that there was already food out for her!!

To be honest this really annoyed me. How dare this person feed that cat. I've fed it for MONTHS! Since the day its mother left her. This mystery person wont know what food it should be having?! This guy wont know the kitten like i do! So I devised a plan. I was going to feed the cat directly after school. So I could get there first, off I went to the shop to buy more cat food, I mean i couldn't do it after school I had to feed the cat of course.

Then I went home, and did my chores and stuff

"Boringggg" Stop whining I'm getting there.

I went to school as usual and then went straight to the park, like trust me I ran, FAST. But to my suprise I was too late... But wait a minute?! It was that girl from class??? I sighed and turned around to go home, "Hey your Kyle broflovski?? The kid from my maths class?" SHE KNEW WHO I WAS?! I swear I'd never turned around so fast. "Yeah, I usually come feed this cat too but i guess im to late" I chucked.

"Jesus dad you are so attention seeking" .....

Anyways so. As i was saying ahem...

"Aww I'm sorry well I'm thinking about adopting it, i dont want it to live without a family for ever. How about you come round sometime after i adopt it and check up on her?" A PRETTY GIRL WAS MAYBE INVITING ME TO HER HOUSE?!?!?!

And basically, Y/n did adopt her, and I got number and-

"Whos Y/n?" I'M GETTING TO THAT SWEETHEART.

And as i was saying I went to her house sometimes to check on mittens, The cat she adopted and We started to like eachother and then we started dating... Bought a house and That, Is how i met your mother.

"WAIT WHAT Y/N IS MOM??? WHAT HAPPENED TO MITTENS!?? WHEN WAS I BORN???"

Jesus Child....

dividers by @khaer

[emeraldspiral]

I know I already posted about this before, but Invader Zim really does nail how autism feels from the inside with the way it portrays food.

Like many autistic people, Irkens have a very restrictive diet, consisting mostly of junk food. Human food is always portrayed as disgusting, but especially from Zim's perspective, often making him gag from just the sight or smell. To hammer the point home even further, some of it is even explicitly said to be made out of non-edible substances and a major brand name is literally "Poop".

Zim loves to eat like any Irken, but at lunch time every day he has to choose between trying to choke down something he doesn't want to or just not eating. Like Zim, autistic people are more prone to food allergies, which means their aversion to certain foods may be more than preferential. But even if you aren't allergic, having to eat something you have an aversion to can feel as awful as if it burnt your skin on contact. But Zim is pressured to eat human food despite the discomfort it causes him in order to not draw negative attention, and his painful and humiliating experiences evoke the trauma of being screamed at, shamed, and punished for "being rude", "ungrateful", "picky", or "a brat" for refusing to eat or failing to adequately hide displeasure. Even Zim's delight at being able to stomach what he thinks are human waffles and his hopes of being able to build up a tolerance for human FILTH in order to better pass for normal evoke the autistic experience of discovering a new food and feeling proud for "expanding your palate", after a lifetime of being taught that food sensitivity is a sign of immaturity and a moral failing.

[iamnmbr3]

If I may jump onto your recent ice cream question, what do you think these following characters’ ice cream orders are?

Lily, James, Sirius, Regulus, all of the Weasleys (or just the twins, Percy, and Ginny if that’s too much), Dumbledore, Narcissa and Lucius… and Voldemort? (or Tom Riddle if you think they might be different)

(Followup to this).

Lily: Strawberry-and-peanut-butter because I like the idea of this being another secret similarity between her and Harry that neither of them ever got to find out about.

James: Ice cream is for losers who don't have more fun entertainments like sadistically tormenting their classmates to amuse themselves with. Why bother getting ice cream when he can feast on Severus's tears instead? But if no classmates are available to victimize he'll settle for chocolate and raspberry with chopped nuts (which seems strangely fitting for him and also makes the ice cream Hagrid buys Harry in book 1 a secret callback).

Sirius: He goes for firewhiskey & raisin when he's a child because it seems daring and kind of adult but discovers he genuinely likes it...and then it becomes a habit and he still likes it as an adult (for the little time that he actually gets to be an adult before getting chucked in prison). More often than not though he just ends up getting the same as James so he can share it with him when James inevitably wants to try some despite already having his own.

Regulus: Plain vanilla - but only a fancy expensive brand that probably nobody who isn't monied and pureblood has ever even heard of so it's not boring Sirius shut up.

Fred: Pistachio.

George: Chocolate. Sometimes after the war Mrs. Weasley forgets and gives him pistachio though and it hurts too much to say anything about it.

Percy: For a lot of years he pretends it's coconut because he thinks that sounds refined and unusual (and also probably bc he saw mr. Crouch eat some once at an event) but actually it's chocolate.

Voldemort: extra dark chocolate as dark as his soul. jk. Pretty sure post cauldron body Voldemort doesn't eat...or probably really have taste buds so he's gonna pass. And all the flavors taste the same to him anyway. A small price to pay for immortality.

Tom Riddle: Black pepper ice cream the one time he had it over Christmas at Hogwarts. But really when it comes to food he's not picky. Just having anything to eat at all is a luxury - doubly so if it's good quality food and not plain gruel or something that used to be halfway decent but has since gone moldy. Given his experiences with famine he's very much of the 'food is fuel' mindset and if he could do something to ensure he needed to eat again (and thus never needed to fear going hungry) he would do it in a heartbreak. But still, he must admit that black pepper ice was surprisingly nice. Alphard's probably the only one who notices tho.

Ginny: Also black pepper ice cream. She's pretty sure it used to be chocolate before second year but she doesn't really want to think about the implications of that so she convinces herself either she misremembers or her tastes just changed. It doesn't really matter either way though, as she usually just orders strawberry and peanut butter since she knows that's Harry's favorite and she wants them to have tastes in common.

Narcissa: Dark chocolate.

Lucius: He doesn't actually have a sweet tooth but if you asked him he'd pick dark chocolate because Narcissa probably knows what she's talking about.

Dumbledore: Waitrose duchy organic lemon curd ice cream. Some find this quirky and entertaining while others are horrified or just plain confused. He finds all the reactions equally entertaining. Also he absolutely shows up to buy it in full wizard garb.

[daisynik7]

A Bento For Kento

Chapter 2: Two Bentos are Better Than One

Pairing: Nanami x f!reader

Word Count: ~2.8k

cw: none that I can think of!

Summary: Nanami gets a pleasant surprise from his student, in the form of a Hello Kitty bento box. Meanwhile, you are an emotional mess who loves your weirdo brother. 

Notes: Bento inspired by this: Japanese Egg Sandwich. Let me know in the comments below if you’d like to be tagged in the next chapter(s)! Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated. Would love to hear what y'all think so far!

Previous Chapter | ao3 | Next Chapter

A Bento for Kento Masterlist

--------------------

Preparing lunches for Ren has been fun, but making a different type of bento three times a week is really pushing your creativity threshold. Knowing that he isn’t picky about eating the same meal every other day, you decide to cook one type of bento throughout the week. Doing it this way has made the whole process less stressful and more manageable.

As for his actual lessons, you remain in the dark. When he comes home Friday afternoon, you ask him, “How was your first week? Still determined to attend this school?” 

He kicks his shoes off and flops down, face first, onto the couch. “Yes, very determined.” He flips onto his back and reaches his arms above his head, stretching. “Can we watch a horror movie tonight? I’m in the mood for something mindless that doesn’t make me think so much. I did too much thinking this week.”

You chuckle, agreeing to his suggestion. “You pick the movie. Nothing too scary, though. I would like to sleep tonight.”

“Can we order pizza too?” he asks, staring at you with his puppy dog eyes. “I really like you’re cooking, but I just want to eat like trash and feel like trash tonight.” 

You laugh even louder, sitting beside him to ruffle his hair. “You’re starting to sound more like an adult. Stop growing up so fast or else you’ll be a miserable millennial like me.”

“Never! You can never take away my youth!” he yells, playfully flailing his limbs up in the air.

After some typical back and forth about what toppings to get, the two of you finally agree on what type of pizza to order. While waiting for the delivery, you give your brother the honors of choosing which horror movie to watch, to which he picks the number one on a list of top ten scariest films he looked up on Google. So much for sleeping tonight. 

~~~

The start of another week means a brand-new bento creation. After searching the Internet for tasty ideas, you decide to make egg salad sandwiches. These were a favorite of yours and Ren’s growing up. To kick it up a notch, you use high quality Shokupan bread, courtesy of your favorite bakery nearby. Hell, you even cut the crusts off. Impressed with yourself, you deliberate if you should change careers to become a professional chef. 

As you delicately place them in the blue bento, you hear his footsteps approach the kitchen. “Yum! Egg salad!” He looks over your shoulder to peek. “And with no crust?!”

You turn your head to face him, grinning. “Yup. Pretty fancy, huh?”

“It’s amazing! The bread looks so fluffy,” he notices, poking at it. He hovers over the bowl of egg salad, still half full. He stares at it for a moment before asking, “Is there a lot left?”

“Yeah, looks like it. I’ll eat it some of it later. Maybe I can give the rest to the neighbors – ”

“Can you pack me an extra then? I’ll eat it!” He starts opening up the cupboards, looking for another box. 

“You want two bentos?” 

“Yes! Please! I’ll eat them both, I promise!” 

You’re surprised, but also flattered. Has your cooking improved so much that your teenaged brother actually craves two servings of your food? Maybe you really should become a chef.

Ren continues to slam the cupboards, his search for another container growing futile. After you’ve had enough, you head to your room and yell out, “Stop! I think I have one in my room, hold on.”

After you find what you’re looking for in your closet, you return to the kitchen, bright red Hello Kitty bento box in hand. “Let’s use this. Do you mind?”

He smiles wide, all his teeth showing mischievously. “This is perfect.” His enthusiasm throws you off. Teenage boys sure are getting weirder and weirder.

~~~

“Hello mentor!” Ren greets as he enters the conference room.

Nanami lifts his head up to return his greeting. “Hello Nakamura, did you have a nice weekend?” 

Ren sits down at an empty desk, unzipping his backpack to retrieve a notebook and pen, all while recounting his weekend activities. Nanami listens intently, simultaneously pleased with how prompt and prepared his student is for their lessons. 

After exchanging a few more pleasantries, they start today’s class. They delve into a more intense subject: curses. They review previous missions that Nanami himself participated in, some of the content being disturbing and gruesome for the average person. To his surprise, Ren doesn’t seem fazed. When he asks questions, he is analytical and intrigued. Nanami appreciates this, as he himself likes to separate sentimentality from work. 

They go through three different case studies until it’s time for a break. He expects that Ren has another delicious feast ready for him in his backpack. He’s had one every single day they’ve had their lessons. Last week, it was the same for all three days. He wonders if it’s different this time.

For some reason, Nanami keeps forgetting to find another bakery that sells ham and cheese sandwiches. He is without a lunch again. He gets up from his desk and walks down the hall into the break room to prepare his tea. This will have to do for now. 

He returns to the conference room, freshly brewed green tea in hand, noticing that Ren is already halfway through his meal. Egg salad sandwiches today, one of Nanami’s favorites. 

Back at his seat, he is shocked, and horrified, to find a Hello Kitty bento box waiting for him on top of his desk.

Whipping his head towards his student, he asks nervously, “What is this?”

Ren smiles, cheeks stuffed like chipmunk. “It’s for you!” Bits of egg salad come flying out of his mouth. “Sorry,” he mutters, swallowing his food all at once. “I couldn’t stand another day seeing you just drink your tea. I had my sister make an extra.” 

Nanami stares at him, then at Hello Kitty. Her black eyes and red ribbon peering into his soul. 

“Well, aren’t you going to eat it? It’s not like Hello Kitty is a curse,” Ren snorts, amused at his own joke.

Still hesitant about this odd situation, he clarifies, “Are you sure you don’t want this? Your sister packed this for you.” It’s not for me, he thinks.

He munches on a cucumber slice, responding, “The only reason I asked her to pack an extra was so I can give it to you. It’s the least I can do since you’re teaching me so much.”

There’s a lump in his throat, an unusual sensation Nanami isn’t familiar with. It’s been a while since someone showed this kind of generosity to him. It wasn’t as if people in his life mistreated him. It’s just nice to be acknowledged. 

He remains standing over the desk when Ren mentions, “Hello Kitty was not my choice. You can blame my sister for that. It was the only one she could find. But I think it fits your personality perfectly,” he teases.

Cracking a tiny smile, he says, “As long as the food is good, I don’t mind it.” He finally sits down and opens the box, bidding farewell to Hello Kitty’s face in the process. 

Underneath the cover is an egg salad sandwich, exactly like the one Ren just devoured. He notices that it’s on Shokupan bread. Good choice, he muses. He handles it with care, relishing the softness, appreciating the meticulously trimmed edges. Once he bites in, his eyes almost roll to the back of his head. Creamy, pillowy, not too salty, and slightly sweet. It’s simple and luxurious all at the same time. Purely exquisite.

Maybe it’s because this was his first taste of real food all day. Maybe it’s because it seems like a gift from his student. Maybe it’s because it makes him feel special. Whatever the reason, he can admit to himself that he is really enjoying this. He’s thankful to be wearing glasses to prevent his pupil from witnessing the dumb expression on his face. It’s embarrassing. Out of character. 

“Pretty good, right? It was our favorite growing up,” Ren mentions, finishing off the rest of his cucumber slices. “She got this bread from a bakery near us. Said the type of bread makes all the difference. It all tastes the same to me.” He has his feet up on the desk now and starts to rub his belly, relaxed and well nourished.

“Your sister is right; it does make all the difference.” Nanami swallows the last bit of his first helping, then starts nibbling on the second. “This wouldn’t be as tasty if it was on generic grocery store bread.”

Ren stifles a laugh and leans further back in his chair to give him an amused look. “Ha, I didn’t expect you to use the word ‘tasty’. It’s funny hearing it from you.”

He wipes his mouth. “Well, it is tasty.”

“I’ll make sure my sister knows her egg salad is tasty,”

“Why are you saying it like that?” He frowns at his student, but when he only responds with a snicker, he chooses not to ask the question again. 

He finishes the rest of the box, leaving no crumbs behind. Hello Kitty returns in plain view as he places the cover back on, handing it to Ren. “Thank you, Nakamura. This was a pleasant surprise.”

“No problem, mentor! Like I said, it’s the least I could do. I’m learning so much from you!” Ren beams at him while he puts both containers away, notebook and pen placed back in front of him.

“Shall we continue the lesson then?”

They go over three more case studies until it’s time to go. Ren asks well thought out questions, taking diligent notes all the while. Nanami explains a few techniques he used in one case study that he personally handled. 

After Ren leaves, he gathers up his suitcase and prepares for his journey home. He’s not as exhausted as he was last week, which he’s thankful for. I should probably find a café, he thinks, scrolling through his phone to look up locations nearby. He won’t subject himself to a single cup of green tea at lunch any longer. That sandwich gave him the energy he needed, but he doesn’t want to assume this is a recurring thing. He finds a café close to the office, setting a reminder for himself to stop by before their next lesson. This will have to do for now.

~~~

You’re already wrapping up work when Ren comes home. “Hey! How was today? Learn anything new?” you ask, closing your laptop. 

He drops his backpack on the floor and sits on the couch, yawning. “I’m learning a ton. I feel like I’ve already gone through half my notebook with all these notes!” 

You sit next to him, watching him open his backpack to retrieve his notebook. As he flips through the pages, you notice a variety of scribbles, as well as some strange doodles of little monsters with bulging eyes. The last page he lands on has a drawing of one long line with hash marks scattered evenly across it. There are notes scrawled around it, the numbers “7” and “3” popping up continuously.

Oh god, this is some cult shit. Panic begins to set in. You’re tempted to start interrogating him. Before you lose your cool, you listen to your inner voice reminding you to trust him. 

Sensing your internal crisis, Ren smiles and waves his hand in front of your face. “Sorry, I know it looks weird, but I promise it’s good.”

What the hell does that mean?! It’s good?!  His response doesn’t alleviate your worries, but as you gaze at his precious face, you realize that he’s putting so much work into whatever this is. It must really be important to him. 

You force a grin and state, “If you say it’s good, then it’s all good.” You reach into his backpack to grab the two empty boxes. “Wow! You must have really liked the sandwiches. I can’t believe you ate both!” 

“Yeah, they were amazing! So tasty! It reminded me of the first meal I ever had when Mom and Dad took me in. It was the first time I ever met you. I ate my whole sandwich in just a few bites, and you gave me half of yours without even thinking for a second. I’ll never forget that.” He smiles at you affectionately. “Actually, I gave the extra one to – ” 

He pauses, noticing the tears streaking down your face, nose sniffling noisily.

“You-hic-you-hic hic-remember that?” you manage to blurt out, your face getting wetter from your embarrassing tears and snot. You promised yourself you wouldn’t get emotional if he brought this up, but you can’t help it!

Concerned, he faces you and places a hand on your shoulder. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you cry! I was just telling you how good it was! It’s a happy memory. I’m happy.”

You wipe your sleeve across your cheeks. “I-hic-just want to make sure I’m-hic-being a good sister.” It takes another minute to steady your breathing. “I know you can’t tell me everything, but if these bentos are the only thing I can do to support you right now, I’ll keep doing it! I was surprised when you asked for another one. I’m just so happy that you like it!” 

He gives your shoulder a small squeeze, smiling. “You’re the best sister ever. I mean it.”

Before you get emotional again, you stand up to wash the boxes in the sink. Halfway through, you remember him trying to tell you something right before you interrupted him with the waterworks. Nothing else is mentioned about it the rest of the night, so you leave it be, thinking it must not be important. 

~~~

Wednesday comes around and Nanami finally remembers to visit the café to pick up his lunch. Unfortunately for him, no ham and cheese. He ends up settling for the less satisfying turkey sandwich. 

He heads up to their usual conference room and settles in. Within minutes, Ren arrives, greeting him as he takes his usual spot at one of the empty desks. They continue their lesson on curses and different abilities that have been used to exorcise them. Nanami references several Jujutsu sorcerers and explains each of their “innate techniques.” He asks Ren if he is aware of any special abilities he might have exhibited throughout his lifetime, to which his pupil acknowledges several odd occurrences he experienced as a child. This helps put some of the pieces together. He’s pleased at the progress they are making. 

They take their break earlier than usual, their stomachs growling with hunger. Nanami hears his student digging through his backpack while he reaches into his suitcase for the sandwich he picked up earlier. He’s startled when Ren appears next to him, holding out the wretched Hello Kitty vessel. 

“Here you go!” he says, placing it on Nanami’s desk, walking back to his own to start munching happily on an egg salad sandwich. 

He wasn’t expecting another bento box today. He actually came prepared this time with his own meal. But he can’t shake this feeling of guilt, as if it would be a sin against humanity if he denied this delicious treat. As if Hello Kitty herself would scorn him for life. 

Also, he’d be lying to himself if he said he wasn’t secretly hoping for this. 

Luckily, he hasn’t taken the food out of his briefcase yet. I’ll just eat it for dinner, he thinks, placing it back to the bottom of his case. 

He stares at Hello Kitty, welcoming her reappearance on his desk. He thanks Ren, then opens the container to start eating. It’s exactly how it was on Monday. Tasty. “Are you sure your sister doesn’t mind making an additional box?”

“She doesn’t mind at all. I think she gets a kick out of it. She actually got emotional about it the other day.”

As he recounts the story, Nanami can’t help but admire his student for remembering a touching memory over something as simple as a sandwich. He also respects the way he describes his sister. She seems nice, he speculates, picturing what she might look like, just so he can put a face to a name. 

Deciding that his thought is innocent enough, he comments, “She seems nice, Nakamura. You are lucky to have a sister like that.” Immediately feeling awkward saying something sentimental out loud, he adds, “I guess I’m lucky too because I’m reaping the benefits of her generosity. Even if I do have to see this damn cat every time.”

Ren chuckles. “Well, get used to it. You’re going to see a lot more of Hello Kitty, whether you like it or not.” 

Nanami smiles. He definitely could get used to this. 

--------------------

Tag List: @liliorsstuff-blog @hughugh20

[ena341polaris]

@arcana-twilight-official

The Atrw boys not canon (but could be) favorite foods, hobbies ect.

Warning: Can be inappropriate to some people.

Arcturus

Foods

Arcturus would eat lots of things but not like "weird" things in a sense. He wouldn't eat things like bugs or black licorice (like some psychopath that has destroyed multiple towers). Also he would not ever eat lamb. Never, if you put a cooked piece of lamb (even if it was cooked to perfection) he would not eat it. As for drinks, he drinks only caprisuns and danimals.

Hobbies

Arcturus, as we know, like to crochet and cook. He also probably likes to go to petting zoo's, not all of the time but I feel like when hes out on a scout he would stop by a petting zoo. But only petting zoos that had sheep. Arcky would also probably play sports, like baseball and soccer but he spuldnt be good or bad he would just be like "okay" persay.

Spica

Foods

Coffee grounds

Coffee

Coffee grounds

Latte

Starbucks

Tiramisu

Coffee

Coffee

Alpheratz's misery

Coffee

Coffee

Coffee

Coffee

Hobbies

Spica does horse riding, but he probably just does every now and again when he has time. He also probably has the longest lasting library member-ship known to man, every single library in Bound Arlyn knows him and he has a membership in all of them. He also probably likes to organize things a lot as well. But I dont understand why he doesnt sleep... to much and he also probably like bickering with alpheratz every now and again just because.

(He makes out with alpheratz all the time. That's why hes not sleeping)

Pollux

Foods

Pollux is picky, obviously, and his go-to item at a restaurant is chicken nuggets with fries and ketchup, you cannot convince me otherwise. He also probably strictly drinks juice like caprisuns and other juice brands. Although, I imagine Pollux would eat all different types of sweets, hes not picky at all when it comes to sweets actually. You could put a moldy doughnut in front of him and he would eat it no question.

Hobbies

Hes probably a youtuber or influencer of some sort. He also probably does prank cams where he draws on Alpheratz's face when hes sleeping. He also is a minecraft kid. Don't ask why. He plays minecraft daily and he has a creeper plushie on his bed and maybe a keychain of an iron golem on his backpack. He also plays Mario games, especially Mario Kart with you and Arcturus!

Karaoke

Vega

Foods

Have any of you noticed that Vega only eats mushed food? Like he eats those go go squeeze apple sauce packets and ice cream which is essentially all mushed food. I imagine him eating baby food (I'm sorry) but like he probably does. He also probably eats popsicles. He also eats mainly fruit based things as if he were a fruit bat.

Hobbies

Gymnastics

Baby girl-ing

Being a cutie patootie

Fencing and sparring

Karaoke

Anything that summoner does, says, breath, eats, looks at, smells, tastes, touches, notices, acknowledges, mentions, talks about, feels, looks at and comprehends.

Summoner

Being talked to by summoner

Being looked at by summoner

Being touched by summoner

Sirius

Foods

Souls of the dammed.

Misery of those around him.

Spiders, centipedes and other insects and reptiles

Other people (probably)

Dirt

Rocks

Sand

Metal

Your pet cat/dog or you siblings

Hobbies

Blowing places up

Stalking people

Pranks

Blowing places up

Shooting the innocent summoner

Target practice

Murder

Genocide

Burglary

Assault

Battery

Theft

War crimes

Alpheratz

Foods

Eats normally but in a more elegant rich type of way.

Really expensive foods and meals.

Hobbies

Sleeping

Zzzzzzzzzz 😴😴😴😴

Making out with spica

😴😴😴😴😴😴

Running away from Schedar

Sleeping

Sleeping

Shaming pollux for being short

Sleeping but this time on top of summoner

😴😴😴😴😴😴😴

[bathroomtrapped]

saw ask. so let's say hypothetically (not really) all the apprentices are autistic (they are) headcanon them

saw ask ‼️‼️ i completely agree unironically and i keep that in mind when i consume/write/draw saw content. jigsaw apprentices? more like PDA autistics anonymous jfc

i (shamefully) am not an amanda-guy and dont have pretty much any headcanons about her overall so sorry about that but ill do some bullet points for the apprentices bc ive thought TOO MUCH abt this

adam

1. the most obvious PDA manifestation, though i think its strong in mark and lawrence for sure, adam just doesnt mask his. he pretty much built his life around maximizing free will and full control over his schedule

2. constantly reducing sensory input with music and being baked. his apartment is dead silent and dark 24/7 tho

3. honestly i think adam has shocking high levels of empathy. most people in his life wouldnt peg him as someone who would struggle with that but i think its what sets him apart from nearly every saw character. hes so isolated but desperate to understand and connect with other people, even if hes in the shadows

4. studies high class targets and their mannerisms. it helped him function during a few job interviews

5. hates eating, hates effort so pretty much eats like shit. very few specific, cheap, prepackaged meals that he can handle. anything that isnt a time commitment to prepare and eat

6. talks too much to overcompensate (not sure if people are able to understand what hes getting at and ends up rambling)

lawrence

1. i hc him as a narc as well which (as you can imagine) combined with PDA makes instruction/criticism/responsibility stressful so hes constantly overloaded

2. same as above, combined with asd i think its the biggest reason he has that canonical low empathy (similar to mark)

3. can only eat incredibly plain and simple foods. rice, bread, vegetables without butters/oils etc. very picky

4. very little auditory sensory issues after so many years in a hospital and needs noise in order to function (including sleep)

5. started wearing pajamas under his suits after a few years in residency because hes already tired 24/7, the terrible fabric on top of that just makes him insane

6. struggled through med school because lectures are hard to interpret and hes more of a visual learner

7. so much eye contact

8. remember that dog picture in his wallet we see for like 5 seconds? i cant imagine someone like him enjoying the texture or sporadic energy of a dog and makes it sleep in dianas room at night. its not allowed in the office and he meticulously cleans all of the dog hair the second he sees any

9. absolutely allergic to change in every way

mark

1. low empathy as i mentioned before

2. he wears a lot loose fitting suits in canon which i think are for sensory reasons. he clearly prioritizes comfort with those (interesting) track pants?

3. i have joked with my mutuals about his off-putting, autistic ass stare countless times

4. terrible liar because he has less control over his facial expressions and mannerisms. he ends up making too much eye contact and thinks that brutal honesty is a good idea. he has an almost nonexistent filter

5. he reminds me of that brand of autism that a lot of patriarchs have, the kind that goes unnoticed bc theyre the head of the household. meat and potatoes his entire life, strange rituals and routines everyone has to get used to

6. extremely black and white sense of justice and a poor understanding of hierarchal authority. he doesnt get why people are above or below other people and struggles with those concepts

7. everyone in the precinct knows not to joke with mark because it will always fall flat and have to be explained. mark has rly funny but dry and blunt humor himself

[anniebear-92]

Paw Prints

Thank you to everyone with your kind words on part one! Here is part two and I think it's a tad longer than the first one. Still thinking about 3 - 4 parts and possibly a special one for NFSW if anyone really wants that one that won't add to the story in anyway other than require a trip to church or holy water... >:) Go off Sinners.

Synopsis:

It's been a few weeks since Bakugo the cat moved into your home. You've gotten to know him as a cat and as you return to university classes he finds himself unsure what to do with himself. Stay tuned for life as a poor college student with a petty cat... He's a cat right?

Warnings: SFW, Trigger warning: mention of cheating against reader, Swearing. Slight mention of partial nudity nothing NSFW though.

Link to: Part One

Part Two: Poor College Student Meet Petty Cat

You had learned several things during the first few weeks of having Bakugo the cat in your home. One of those things, is how highly intelligent this cat was. He would sit nearby and listen as you chatted away at him like he was your best friend. He had his ways of responding, huffs or swipes of the paw, smirk like expressions when he's extremely smug and the ever present judging glare. Along with this, it had been a struggle getting the cat to take his antibiotics for the required timeframe the vet had set, as soon as he saw that bottle it was if the cat never existed. He would hide until you either gave up or finally found him after a long game of hide and seek. Even hiding the medicine in the food was not enough, as he had started to turn his nose up at any and all cat foods provided to him. Which led to another thing you learned, he was picky.

You had bought and tried almost a dozen brands of cat food at this point in order to make the snooty feline happy. Wet food, dry food, mixture of both… nothing seemed to work… except your own food. He would sit across from you and try to eat from your bowl or the pan if you left it out just a moment too long. You had tried to deter him from this habit, however stubborn was his middle name.

After several days of trying to deter him from eating your food, you had thrown in the towel and just started preparing him his own bowl. Originally you had attempted to give him portions without spices as per your research online, however he too turned his nose up and swiped at you with those large paws until you added in whatever was in your own. You had conferred with the vet upon his check up and they had told you it was an odd behavior but to monitor him closely and which food were okay/not okay for kitties.

Bakugo was given a clean bill of health a week after he had first seen the vet. He had his up and down days where he would be super lethargic, barely getting up to do much. However by the time he finished his medicine he was known as a very energetic little ball of fur with a bad case of the zoomies… at the worst hours.

The first time it happened you were woken up to the largest crash in the living room. Fearing you were being broken into, you had grabbed a baseball bat from underneath your bed and slowly snuck out to see who dared break into your apartment at this god awful hour.

Flipping on the light with a brave face you were met with a very messy living room, your favorite vase now smashed to pieces on the floor with the flowers and soil all over your nice carpet, papers you had been working on for university were strewn all over the floor and sitting in the middle of the chaos… Bakugo. He froze with his paws laid out before him, his top half lowered to the ground and his rear in the air as his tail flipped dangerously. His eyes met yours with wide blown out pupils before he suddenly sprinted away into the spare bedroom, almost in shame.

Taking a deep calming breath you had simply cleaned up the mess and returned to bed, grumbling about a little gremlin cat living in your home. This continued almost every night for a week until you had threatened to lock him in a kennel at night, you weren't serious but it had some how did the trick. He had limited his zoomies to more decent hours and avoided breaking anything else… on accident that is.

The little shit had a habit of getting payback on you for anything he seemingly didn't like. You didn't feed him fast enough? Your mug was on the floor, shattered and coffee everywhere. You step on his tail because he was zooming under your feet to beat you wherever you were going and it was his own fault? You had a nice pile of feces in your shoes later that day.

This became the normal for you for the first few weeks, though at night when the little terrorist was done being a little gremlin, the biggest thing you learned…he was quite the lover. He would crawl into your lap while rubbing all over your hands and up into your neck, against your cheeks. His low rumble purr soothing you as he closed his eyes and drifted to sleep after scenting you as his own with your fingers massaging his fur.

Though it took quite some time after that first time he laid with you for him to come near you again, he was truly a hot and cold cat. Even with that, it was on HIS terms, not yours. If you wanted to snuggle and he didn't? Oh boy wrong move. You had the scratches to prove it.

Today was a new occasion, you were returning to school after a break so Bakugo would be home alone for the first time for more than a few hours or minutes. You were unsure how he would take it as he would normally greet you at the door even for a short trip and demand cuddles before you could do anything else. How dare you have a life without him!

You were mid packing your bag with supplies when Bakugo hopped up next to you, tilting his head in question. 'The fuck you goin?' You tapped his nose in a boop, his ears laying back in annoyance and eyes scanning you for the audacity you had to treat him this way. "I'm going to school today bud so you need to be a good boy." He huffed in answer, his head turning to lick at his paw. 'I'm always a good boy dumbass.' He paused mid lick, turning his head with ears flattened as he processed what you said. 'School?' Now all packed, you swung the bag over your shoulder and made for the door.

Dropping the bag beside you as you crouched in order to put on your shoes, an interruption known as the fur ball from hell rubbed against your legs. He let out the most pitiful meow as his carmine eyes locked with yours.

"Aw don't give me that look. I'll be back later sweet pea." He scrunched up his nose at the chosen term as you ran a quick swipe of your hand over his forehead. He hopped onto your bent knee, rubbing the length of his body against your chest in the attempts you'll chose to stay. Finishing your laces you picked him up and snuggled him close. A low warning growl was let out by the spicy kitten until you planted a soft kiss between his ears. The noise ceased suddenly as he looked up at you in surprise. This was the first time you had done anything like that, even during snuggling sessions.

Placing him on his paws you began gathering up your coat and bag once more as Bakugo licked his hide out of embarrassment. Now all geared up and ready to leave you gave him one more glance and a smile that squeezed the small cat's heart. "See you later handsome boy."

Exiting the apartment left Bakugo in a state of shock. Now what did he do? How long would his food giver be gone? Would he be here by himself forever? No more scratchies? Or kis- No he couldn't think of that one. He huffed and padded himself into the living room, hopping up onto the couch in HIS designated spot. He began moving around the blanket, paws pushing and pulling like he was making a batch of biscuits to get comfortable. Satisfied he plopped himself down and curled his tail just below his eyes, glaring at the clock hanging over the television. 'Guess I'll just nap until they get home.'

You arrived on campus just in time, parking your modest piece of crap next to some fancy car you could only dream of owning one day. Strolling along the path a voice broke you from your la-la land train of thoughts.

"Hey! Over here!" You were met with an energetic red head with the widest smile who was steadily waiving you down towards a group of people. Shining a bright smile you wandered over and greeted your friends. The redhead threw an arm over your shoulders and you laughed. "Hey Kirishima, how are you?"

He shrugged before addressing the raven haired boy beside him. "Sero! You know F/N right?" The ravenette nodded before sticking his hand out in greeting, "You're in Aizawa's lecture class right?" You nodded in response, giving your first and last name as you shook his hand. You had met Sero quite a few times but never formally introduced yourself during friend gatherings. You were suddenly yanked from Kirishima's grasp by a curly pink haired girl. "Bestie! I haven't seen you in so long!"

"Mina, we just got off break! Don't be so dramatic." You pushed her face back by a finger to the middle of her forehead as she whined. "That was forever!"

The group made their way to your respective classes, Mina following you into the lecture hall as you took the usual seats near the back of the hall. "So anything new happen?" She leaned over the tiny desk in anticipation of even a crumb of gossip or drama. With a shrug you open your writing tablet and flipped a pencil between your fingers. "It was mostly uneventful really. I called it quits with what's his face within the first days."

She gasped heavily as she slammed a palm down. "I knew it! Kiri owes me ten bucks!" The pencil in your fingers stopped, "You bet on my love life?" She shrugged in response, sitting back against the chair. "Kirishima was dead set you two were end game. I knew for a fact you weren't. Your chemistry was all off. So we bet on who would be right. I just didn't realize it was so soon… Damn I'm good."

You snorted in response as the loudest teacher on campus walked into the hall to greet everyone. "Good morning students! We'll be learning something new today!" Mina leaned over and spoke in a hushed tone, "So what happened that you called it off anyway?"

Rolling your eyes you whispered "So nosey… He was texting some bitch right there on the couch next to me while we watched a movie saying some shit about how he loved her and couldn't wait to see her. I called him out and he claimed it was his cousin. When I told him to call her so I could say hi, tell me why the bitch answers "Hey baby!" and he just looks at me like a deer in the headlights. Turns out he's been seeing this girl during our entire relationship."

Mina's jaw dropped as she gasped loudly "No way! The whole time??" You nodded somberly, "Would you two like to share with the lecture hall what is so riveting we're interrupting the main show?"

The both of you froze like children caught in a cookie jar and gave a shy no sorry when Mina frowned. "Sorry Professor Mic." He nodded and continued on about whatever it was he was saying before lecturing you both. The rest of class was spent in silence other than the scratch of pencils against the paper taking notes, the other classes mostly 'welcome backs' and here's your new topics for this semesters.

At the end of your classes you groaned heavily at the added weight of a few new books and papers that were sure to set you further into debt. An arm hooked you against what felt like a brick wall once more as you looked up to see the shining red head once again. "How were classes?"

You shrugged, wrapping an arm around your friend's waist in support. "Lame, Mina got us in trouble during Present Mic's lecture because she had to know about my break. By the way you owe her ten bucks."

He growled "You and that guy broke up?" Nodding in affirmation he huffed, "Dammit, I owe that girl so much money at this point. Sero better not split up with his partner or I'm kicking his ass." Letting out a loud laugh you ruffled the red spikey hair to his dismay. "Quit betting on people's love life and focus on your own, you might not be in debt to the resident love guru."

He let out a soft breath through his nose as he hugged you closer with the one arm. "Nah, it's too much fun when I do prove her wrong and win it all back."

Your best friend released you once you stopped near his shiny new truck. You sighed in realization it would be years of paying off debt before you could own something that nice. He gave you a hug and told you he'd be by some time since he missed his best friend. You nodded and told him that'd be awesome before making your way over to your shit box… I mean your car. Getting the thing to start you pulled out from the parking lot and made your way home wondering on the way what state your home would be when you arrive home.

Bakugo's ears twitched at the familiar sound of the tumblers turning of the lock at the door. He yawned widely, showing off those sharp canines before hopping down and racing to the entrance. He quickly stole a glance at the clock and realized his human had been gone for eight whole hours! The gall they had for leaving him so long!

His human stepped through the door, their eyes locking as she gave him a bright smile. "Hey my handsome man! How was today?" He huffed in response, he had spent the entire time asleep save for the few minutes he had wondered the apartment looking for something to do while he waited for the food giver to return.

'My food bowl is empty. Fix it!'

He flicked his head towards the kitchen where his bowl indeed sat empty from breakfast. You ran a hand over his ears before removing all your gear, the smell of something foul hit him like a ton of bricks and he shrunk back with a loud hiss. You pulled your hand away quickly in shock, watching him eye you like you had just spit on his ancestor's grave.

"What's wrong bubba?" He began sniffing heavily as he inspected your entire form, weaving around your body as you finished placing your shoes away. He had smelled something simliar many times, why couldn't he put a place on it now? He should remember that stink anywhere.

You sat on the couch as your shadow followed close behind, still trying to discern the nasty smell. You set your bag beside the couch and began pulling out your tablet and pencils so you could begin on the assignment for the day when he shoved his face into yours. Sitting back in shock his eyes narrowed as he sniffed loudly once more.

'Dog! You smell like mutt!' He hissed loudly as you attempted to console the pissed off feline only for him to shrink back and swipe at your fingers with his paw. How dare you come in here smelling like a mutt!

"I don't know what I did Bakugo… Did I leave you too long?"

He huffed before hopping across to your lap, rubbing himself all along your arms, chest and legs. He made sure not to miss an inch when he realized the strongest smell came from your neck. Who dared touch what belonged to him? He hoped onto the back of the couch as you ignored him, now used to his tsundere actions of love and hate. He began rubbing his cheek against the back of your neck in the attempts to get rid of the horrible smell.

'Stupid fucking dog, I'm going to need a damn bath after this one!'

You were half way through your assignment when Bakugo was finally satisfied that the strange scent was gone. He trotted off before bopping at his bowl with his paw. 'Food servant! Food!'

You sighed heavily before standing up and pulling out some left overs you had made just for him. Bakugo had knocked a container of spices into the pot on "accident" and he had ate it so fast he had demanded more by batting at your head until you finally dumped the rest into the bowl. You placed it into his bowl as he nodded in approval. 'About fucking time, I'm going to waste away!'

Bakugo got used to your routine very quickly once he realized you would be going to this university for at least eight hours a day until the weekend hit. However to his dismay, most days you came home smelling like the same mutt each and every time. Where was this stupid dog that you kept meeting? Was he not good enough?

You also quickly got used to being scented heavily when you got home each and every day though some days were different as if you didn't smell as bad. (You didn't because you didn't see a certain someone that day.)

The day that changed your life started like any other day. Bakugo had been living at your place for a couple months now and you were approaching quickly one of the most stressful times as a student…

Finals. Currently you were holed up in your room, the door shut and messy hair up out of your face as you furiously scratched away at the paper in preparation. Soft thumps and scratches came at the door as the demon that lived in your home indicated he wanted into the room. You had shut him out as he had distracted you from studying so much that you had made the decision to put him out. His loud yowling in protest had you placing ear bud to tune him out with your favorite band.

The scratching finally stopped as the cat huffed, stalking away to take his spot on the couch. He lay there batting a ball the twinkled with the bell inside until he fell asleep, only to be woken when you finally exited your room in the wee hours of the morning. You wandered out to get ready for class that day since you would be starting finals and had not changed into your clothes for the day yet. Bakugo watched as you passed in the tiniest shorts he had seen yet and an oversized hoodie that had slipped to the side so your shoulders were clearly visible. He felt his face heat as he turned away and hid under his tail in embarrassment.

She's just the food giver! No bad thoughts! You've seen her naked, she's not much to look at!

Yeah, okay Bakugo, whatever helps you sleep at night… I'll stop.

Any way, you prepared a small breakfast as your nerves for the day ahead left you with no apatite that Bakugo ended up with the majority in his bowl. You returned to your den to make yourself presentable for the day and once satisfied you didn't look like a homeless crazy cat person you returned to the bright living room to start the day officially.

Bakugo had finished every bite of his meal, happy as a lark he followed you towards the front door while you laced up your shoes per usual. He sat impatiently waiting for his goodbye scratches and totally not his goodbye kisses. He had his dignity…

When you packed up your things and left without even acknowledging him his tail flailed in annoyance. What the hell? He began pacing back and forth, did he do something wrong? Did he cross a line somewhere? He wasn't that bad was he? Was he being abandoned… again?

He spread out in front of the door his ears pressed back against his head that rested on his paws, his tail dropping to the floor as he huffed. The door clicked back open and a desperate you rushed back in to see the dejected cat laying by the door. Your heart squeezed as you got down and pressed a kiss against his tiny nose. "I'm sorry handsome I forgot your goodbye. I'm just so stressed this morning. Have a good day my little prince."

Rushing back out the door the cat's fur bristled as his tail twitched in excitement. The fact that you came back and gave him kisses had zero to do with it okay! He pads away to his spot on the couch where he spent most his days waiting for you, he closed his eyes happily and dreamt of how his life had changed.

The day was extremely stressful as you began the first round of finals for your classes, sitting as away from your pink haired friend as possible in order to not distract you from the important task at hand. She had pouted that she couldn't peek over your test when you shot her an apologetic smile. The test went smoothly and you strangely felt prepared regardless of the anxiety that flowed through you. Today would be longer than most since each class was given extra time to complete their final, so you would be late getting home that evening.

Hours and multiple tests later you were finished for the first day of finals, trudging your way back across the quad towards your car. As per usual a strong arm Shepard hooked you into the wall of muscle. "How did you do short stack?" You pushed him away lazily, to which he let you since there would be no way you would normally be able to move him under normal means. "I'm not short, you're just ungodly tall."

He snorted before leaning down and rubbing his cheek with yours. "You know I love to tease." You snorted and let out an exhausted sigh, too tired for his golden retriever like energy. This is why you were a cat person, less energy… Even though Bakugo made you want to pull your hair out with his zoomies sometimes.

"If you must know I think I did better than you."

His lip jutted into a pout, ruffling your hair which earned a groan of annoyance from you. "Kirishima stop that!" He chuckled before releasing you finally to simply walk beside you. "Alright, I'll quit. That was mean though…" You cracked a smile at his dejected look almost like a scolded puppy.

"How did you do Kiri?" His bright smile was back, "I think I passed this time! Those extra study sessions we did as a group awhile ago really helped!"

You nodded as you found yourself back at your car, his truck parked just a few spots away. "Well this is me. I'll see you guys later." Kirishima pulled you in for a hug, releasing you to make his way towards his own.

The engine on your car whirred over and over without turning over, sounding like a wounded animal. You tried a few more times before a rasp on your window caught your attention with a startle. Your red haired best friend leaning down with a concerned face. You rolled down your window as he crossed his arms and leaned in on the door.

"Your car won't start?"

With a nod he tilted his head to indicate for you to try again, listening intently as the dying vehicle failed once again to turn over. You popped the hood at his prompt and he gave the starter a good couple knocks after messing with your battery wires. You tried once again to no avail when he sighed, hands on his hips. "Your starter is out, needs replaced."

Your head fell back with a low groan, like you had the money for that right now. "You want a ride home for now?" You agreed seeing as it as now dark out, hopping into the passenger seat of his stupid truck. You grumbled under your breath about wishing you had the money he did until he got in and you thanked him for taking you home.

"Don't worry about it darlin'. I got you, by the way if you want me to fix your car I can grab a starter later and swing back to fix it." You blinked and shook your head "No that's too much. I can get it."

He shook his head before turning the radio up just a bit, one of your favorite songs slowly coming into existence. "It's nothing. My parents left me a lot of money to go to school with, I can't leave my best friend without a car."

After arguing it would be too much half way home you finally agreed to let him fix it with the agreement you would pay him back eventually. Though you had a part time job you were starting soon, being a full time student didn't always account for the extras like car repair. He pulled in front of your building and turned off the radio with a snap of the dial. "Ill have the car fixed for you by tomorrow and I'll pick you up for class."

You gave him a soft smile and took his hand, thanking him. His smile lit up the truck as he told you it was nothing and he'd see you tomorrow. With a pep in your step you skipped up the stairs to your door. Slipping the key into the lock you opened it and dropped your bag right away.

"Bakugo I'm home!" You called while slipping off your jacket and hanging it on the hook.

"Well it's about fucking time! You reek of that mutt again!"

You turned quickly at the sudden deep voice, coming face to face with strangely familiar, narrowed, vermillion eyes. Though a complete stranger was slowly standing up from the couch, the blanket your cat always wore wrapped around his bare hips. On top of his head sat a pair of sandy blonde cat like ears and a tail swished back and forth behind him. You backed into the door with a thump earning a confused expression on his extremely handsome face.

"Who the hell are you??"

[swearingcactus]

OC INTERVIEW : Lil V :)

thanks for the tag @v-eats-bugs (and @elvenbeard's post that reminded me that I have yet to do this even though I was tagged!) get ready for your local little guy answering some of your q's (this pic was supposed to just be a cover but it does make him look like he's answering these before bed in his jammies, which could fit too)

🔸Name?🔸 "Contrary to popular belief, it's not a pasta brand, but I would neither confirm or deny any guesses."

There's been wild rumors that he's changed his name to Vitoli or Viagra (Jackie's fault for that one) but nope, his name's still Vincent. His last name's Woodman or some other boring generated name hospitals print out for babies with no parents claiming them, so he never went by it. Great decision on his end, cus "Vincent Woodman-or-similarly-boring-sounding-last-name" sounds more like an accountant than a cool merc.

🔸Nickname?🔸 "Just V."

Before Atlanta, some 'friends' burned him and used him as scapegoat for a gig and he landed in prison because of it. His efforts to erase the records and leave much earlier than his sentence bankrupted him; but he got out and decided to wipe his slate clean. What better way to start a new life than with a new (technically just chopped down) name?

🔸Gender?🔸 "🤨📸"

Cis male. But he thinks it's weird if people gotta ask that.

🔸Star sign?🔸 "Aw fuck, I gotta ask Misty for that, I keep forgetting which one I am. Hang on."

This is totally not a cop-out cus i haven't played phantom liberty and therefore am still unsure when is his canon birthday. Either way he doesn't care about it that much.

🔸Height?🔸 "5'8 which I've heard is 173cm."

173cm is NOT 5'8, he's lying or simply getting it wrong, and frankly for night city denizens, that's more amusing to ponder than his height.

🔸Orientation?🔸 "Oh ;) I'm not picky! ;) heheh wait i mean 🤨📸"

Sometimes his excitement at the prospect of getting laid by hot men and women makes him forget to act cool and nonchalant about being bi.

🔸Nationality/Ethnicity?🔸 "I mean I'm pretty sure I gotta be somewhat white, but never knew the detes. Not gonna pay a corpo for them to tell me about it either, cus what do they know?"

He has a paler complexion, but sometimes his features on the right lighting kinda play tricks on you. With him being from Heywood and no parents to speak of, he has no idea if he could actually be part Hispanic or Asian or any other ethnicity. Obviously, he could pay to get some 2077 "hyper-accurate" version of 23andMe but he thinks that's bull and way too easy to fake. Totally just that and not cus he gave up on the idea of biological families anyways, nope.

🔸Fave fruit?🔸 "I dunno, never really had anything 'ganic 'cept some grapes and they were really sour, so probably not those. Pears are okay, I guess."

🔸Fave season?🔸 "Winter. Atlanta sucked but they had better winters."

Atlanta's winter was colder than Night City's, so the idea of spending the holidays just cold and broke with crippling loneliness sounded too horrible. He attempted to avoid this by treating himself to a 'real' white christmas experience, tried ice skating and making snow bunnies when it did snow and got hot chocolate and even bought himself some overpriced present and all that. Atlanta didn't work out, but he did like winter coming out of it, and he gets nostalgic of it when the holiday season come around.

🔸Fave flower?🔸 "Sunflowers. Oh, but cherry blossoms are really pretty too, even when they're just holos."

He doesn't tell this story much, but when he got out of prison, the field next to the road was riddled with dying sunflowers. Nothing welcomed him out of the gutter but those shriveled plants right next to ones that were done blooming couple weeks ago. If he had been able to get out earlier, he could've seen at least some of them in bloom. It should be a bitter thought and memory, but he found walking next to them very comforting. He has a soft spot in his heart for them ever since.

🔸Coffee, tea, hot chocolate?🔸 "Well not coffee, and not tea, so I guess hot chocolate it is. Actually, you have that iced?"

He used to think he's a coffee guy but dating Kerry made him realize the canned coffee he drinks are just sugar with a hint of caffeine flavor. (he hated the black ganic stuff Kerry drinks but powered through that One Time) In general though, he likes cold drinks more than hot ones.

🔸Average hours of sleep🔸 "I'd like to say 8 but I know that'd be lying. Probably closer to 5 or 6."

Don't get him wrong, he gets on the bed. He just scrolls his phone for hours after and doesn't sleep immediately when he gets on it is the problem. He falls asleep closer to 2-3AM, then wakes up at 8 or 9. This is a real issue if he stays the night over with Panam at camp, since the Aldecaldos are mostly early birds.

🔸Dog or Cat person?🔸 "Oh cat, definitely. Have you seen my cat Nibbles?" *queues up 100+ picture slides of her directly to your holo*

🔸Dream trip?🔸 "Antarctica, maybe? Heard it's kinda peaceful over there, and it'd be even colder than Atlanta so hell yeah, could get all cozy, bundled up and waddle around there for a bit."

🔸Fave Fictional Character🔸

to reiterate this post , he found a copy of Toy Story 4 and made fun of how Duke Caboom sounded like a chipper, Canadian version of Johnny. Then the whole 'guy who failed a stunt and got thrown in the trash because of it, is actually deeply terrified about the entire experience but still continues to be a happy dude' hit too close to home.

🔸Number of blankets they sleep with🔸 "??? People sleep with multiple blankets??"

Just one. He gets too cold even with it when he gets even sicker from the relic, so he sleeps with fuzzy socks too now. The idea of two blankets for one person never occurred to him.

🔸Random fact🔸 "Okay, I'm only gonna tell you this 'cus I'm back in Night City, and enough time has passed that no way anyone can actually get anything to stick to me... but back in Atlanta, I used to crash weddings. Not even for gigs, was just trying to avoid spending eddies on meals. It's really easy to just sneak in, especially if you wear some black cardigan, or flash a digital lanyard, or just walk really fast and with purpose. They just assume I'm part of the event organizer or one of the catering team, and let me in. Then you just act like you've been invited, grab a plate and mingle with some guests who don't look important. Was better entertainment than BDs too, hearing all the stuff about the bride and groom from different tables. Sometimes I just let slip some gossip I heard from another group to the current one I'm mingling with, and shit would hit the fan real quick, which means I get to delta nice and quiet. I wish I could stay for more of 'em, Atlanta weddings end a lot more in fist-fights than Night City ones, that's for sure."

Yeah so he might not know or realize this detail, but he most definitely was the reason those fist-fights happen and was part of the reason for the spike in divorce rate in Atlanta for a bit.

phew that was a lot of words. no pressure tagging @mail-me-a-snail @glitchinginthegarden and anyone else who'd like to join but haven't been tagged! :)

[commsroom]

Some silly eiffel questions that idk if you’ve talked about before but:

- would he play dnd? (I think yeah lol but I’m curious what you think) and if so what class would he play as?

- his favorite flavor of slushy

- how does he cook marshmallows? (Burn them, carefully toast them, eat them out of the bag, etc?)

- if he could choose to be a fantasy creature, which one would he choose?

Anyways I hope you feel better and that these distract you from the icky feelings!

have you seen the doug eiffel dnd script? i love to show people the doug eiffel dnd script. it was written a couple of years ago as part of the fundraising for unseen, and is obviously non-canon, however. it's non-canon in the sense that this group of people in these circumstances would never play dnd. i think the anecdotes + attitudes expressed by eiffel are perfectly on brand and they are canon to me. so... how he feels about dnd, and at least one answer to 'what class would he play' is in there. it's very funny to me that he's a minmaxer, and that his character is trained in "bazooka karate" like... sigh... yeah. of course. i don't think his tastes have changed that much since he was a teenager. (he would be a bard though, obviously, if that was the question.) i also think eiffel would be just insufferable to play dnd with because, like. if he's a player, he's going to be mad that he can't tell the story he wants to. if he's the DM, he's going to do zero planning and go on wild tangents having conversations between NPCs and forget he's not just supposed to be telling a story to himself. lost in his own world.

blue raspberry. he loves sugary artificial garbage that doesn't resemble any real world flavor, and blue raspberry is like, the 90's flavor. so many of his preferences are just nostalgia. he would also be really obnoxious about showing people how it dyed his tongue. (i don't think he's too picky about his sugary garbage, though.)

well. you already know he's not doing it carefully. even if he tried to do it carefully, he would still burn them, but i think he prefers them kinda burnt anyway. he would make fun of someone (minkowski) for how meticulously she toasts marshmallows. and he does also get impatient and shovel handfuls of them into his mouth directly out of the bag in-between the ones he immolates. eiffel is the kind of guy who would show off by proving how many marshmallows he can put in his mouth. i guarantee that guy has nearly choked trying to defend his honor as the reigning chubby bunny champion.

actually given the choice, i think he's perfectly happy to be human (and wouldn't trust an offer like that anyway) ... as an icebreaker question, though? he immediately gives a basic, 'cool' answer like werewolf, and then his brain catches up to his mouth and he goes wait, hold on, can i take that back? because all of the potential downsides just occurred to him, and he starts jumping around with his answer and getting more and more specific until it derails the whole conversation and he's just asking, like, if there would be a catch and what powers he's allowed to have, etc. and whoever asked is like, um... whatever you want, i guess? (<- regretting it.) the person after him says they'd be a dragon and he's like, ugh. no fair. i should've been a dragon.

[ourolite2]

　　　　　　 ༅ 𝒞irce 𝒴ué'li 𐙚 ˙

♱ all sobriquets + pseudonyms. ࿓ fang/master yuè’li ( legendary title + formal title ), circo/mr. circo ( playful + respectful, via yashmi ), sir ( his dogs + formal others ), sir circe/ sir yuè’li ( formalities/commonly respectful ).

ᰍ overall notables. plays an electric guitar (named it delune). has a bloodhound named babydoll and a doberman named yìzé. works as a part-time music teacher for 2nd - 3rd graders. asanbosam’s (the type of vampire he is) are more agile in trees and high places, so he’s kind of clumsy otherwise. often recommends products (notably the brand anzhong, originated by an upcoming oc of neso’s), random cleaning tips, or even seasonings. considers calling off of work a lot, though he knows if he does they’re bound to fire him this time. circe also doesn’t socialize too much, and he’s very territorial about his cottage (and so is yìzé— wonder where he gets that from). he’s a little too territorial actually, seeing as circe usually sucks the blood of/eats any trespassers that ignore his precaution signs. he does so by jumping down from the roof of the cottage or a tree and pinning them. (even friends get tackled if they don’t give him a heads up that they’re on the way!) ᰍ standard physical facts. 6'3. retractable wings with a 20 foot span, which are black and grey with red, pink and silver undertones, and retractable iron hooks for feet. tips of his hair turn auburn when he’s experiencing intense emotions. always smells like anzhong products- particularly colognes. has a chinese tattoo on his inner forearm that translates to damu héxián qín. his nails are painted black, but they get chipped easily because he’s really hands-on daily. lastly, he has a deep, relaxed and very distinctive voice which can be heard here!

დ genshin au notables! n/a ( temporarily ). დ spider-verse au notables! n/a ( temporarily ). დ jujutsu kaisen au notables! n/a ( temporarily ).

ᰍ age appearance. twenty-five ( 25 ). ᰍ birthday. may 9th. ᰍ nationality, race, + ethnicity. ( varies per au ), asanbosam, + senegalese and chinese. ᰍ gender, prns, + sexuality. male (amab), he/him, + omnisexual.

ᰍ sun sign. taurus. ᰍ MBTI. istp-a, the assertive virtuoso.

ᰍ likes. his electric guitar (delune— yes, he named her); playing the guitar is considered his biggest hobby, adoration and talent. his old doberman, yìzé, and his bloodhound babydoll. his cottage. alone time. blood oranges. ironically, loves garlic bread + garlic based dishes (especially pasta). scaring trespassers, or making his friends jump with jump-scares and shoulder-taps for a good laugh. coal black, wine red, and sometimes pink! strawberry icecream. philosophy and sacred music, especially within the selenian race. feminism. boots. silver jewelry. having his hands in aesthetically pleasing positions (pockets, behind his head while laying down,arms crossed, etc). anzhong products. people who use manners. sweethearts, but especially male sweeties (he just wants to pinch their cheeks ugh). MOTHAFUCKING INDIGO! <;3 ᰍ dislikes. random space invaders/leeches. too many home guests (or any really). yellow. stalkers/yanderes/yandere-coded people (specifically when targeted at him). pushy people. paranoia, pessimism + assumptions. difficult/slow learners (as a music teacher he struggles with younger kids that don’t process so easily). jellies and jams. the taste of vanilla. misogyny and misandry. bad hair days. getting stuff under his nails, especially when freshly done. vengeance, gossip + untrustworthiness. cooking for people, especially when there’s a lot of em’— no, even worse if they’re too picky.. bicycling. hot, summer days. being caught in the rain without a stylish umbrella. loud noises. dogs that bark too much.

･ﾟﾟ❥ quotes.

After It Rains ୨୧ “Jeez, what a mud bath. *Looks at his dogs.* Glad you two are out of your piglet puppy days heh heh. Guys? *Theyre walking away from him and he’s holding back laughter.* Was it something I said? Come ahhnn! I’m saying you liked the mud!”

About Jihane ୨୧ “The last time we spoke she foretold that my aura was yellow indefinitely. She was wrong. .. It’s red. *Looks off at something in the distance and pauses.* I’m not delusional.”

About Circe: Signature Dish ୨୧ “Nah. That’s a myth, just a little misconception. I use garlic in a lot of my dishes, especially pasta. The best kind I’ve tried thus far? Cherub Sin, easily. It’s a faultless dish. I personally believe the best noodle for any garlic and parmesan pasta is angel hair, and that dish recognizes it perfectly.”

Good Night ୨୧ “Hm.. Remember the night routine I showed you. Ice. Your. Face. Top priority, right? Alright then, and I bid you goodnight. *Nods off salute-like with two fingers and walks away.*”

oc masterlist. extended details. visualizer.

⑅ leman productions. all rights fucking reserved, do not plagiarize.

[togglesbloggle]

the real question is: are you buying cheap American peanut butter (Skippy, Jiff, generic store brand), which has corn syrup and artificial preservatives, or are you buying the Good Peanut Butter that is more expensive and will separate out into oil and nut mash if you let it sit, but tastes significantly better? No judgement either way, I buy the cheap stuff for the office because I don't have a convenient fridge to keep it in and it has a longer shelf life, (1/2)

but they are different products. Also, good luck getting it past the TSA. From similar experience they'll probably take your bag aside for an extra search but let you through eventually. You could put it out on its own tray to speed things up. (2/2) --

Jiff, by request.

There's really two ways to think about the cheap/highly processed American grocery items; either you can think of them as mass-produced low-budget alternatives to 'real food', or you can think of them as a separate type of food entirely, with different goals and purposes.

American (Heinz) yellow mustard, for example, is quite different than what non-Americans tend to think of as 'mustard'. It's smoother (like with the peanut butter, consistency of texture is an important feature), has that vivid artificial yellow coloring, and carries a different flavor profile with a lot more sugar. I often find myself craving this condiment when I'm overseas, even though my Undisclosed Charming Alpine Village has a robust and tasty set of mustards that I often eat.

When you grow up with processed American foods, they sort of become their own category in your head, and what was once a facsimile becomes 'real' in its own way. The other thing in my bag is pizza-flavored Combos, because one of the people I'm meeting can't get enough of them; this guy also lives half a day's train ride from Tuscany and has actual Italian pizza from Italy available whenever he wants. At some level of abstraction, it stops being a compromise alternative to pizza, and starts being a thing to value in itself.

The punchline is that personally, I don't mind the store-brand peanut butter you get off the shelf from EU groceries like Billa; they're not quite as tasty as Jiff, but I'm not that picky about my peanut butter. So I'm content to eat the lesser imitation of American-style peanut butter while I'm overseas, and save the 'real' stuff for others who don't have easy access to it. It's a pretty funny joke if you think about it.