#he’s complicated yeah and a lot of the shit that he does is a direct result of trauma (explanation not excuse!) but he does kinda suck

[mydarlingmylifeandmybride]

Who is my favorite character in ofmd and why is it Izzy Hands

[elucubrare]

What are your biggest turn-offs when reading/watching historical fiction or retellings of myths?

this is really complicated - i can put it in two boxes, both of which are packed very full.

disconnection from the material reality of the past

when characters display a very specifically modern mindset (about social issues especially, but other stuff too)

(I also get bothered by some kinds of modern language - I don't mind it when, idk, an author uses "sensible" with the modern connotation of "practical" and not the 18th century "emotional" or "empathetic", but "yeah" or "okay," or even, as i found out when someone used it in medieval fantasy, "holy shit" will get on my nerves.)

there are modern things where (made up example!) a character who's supposed to be a cook will talk about making caprese salad for a fancy restaurant in December, and someone snarking on the book will say "yeah, right, they should know better than to make something that depends on a fresh summer vegetable!" and even with greenhouses, that's pretty fair. and that's even more extreme in the past. it's 1650 in Verona, it's December, you cannot obtain fresh tomatoes. i don't think this means that people in the past were, necessarily, more emotionally or spiritually in tune with the cycle of the year, or the labor it took to get clothes, or furniture, or any other material item, and of course wealth can insulate people from some of that difficulty, but it does mean that the seasons had more direct impact on people's lives. It's possible to, for example, buy clothes ready-made, but for anything fancy, it's more likely that it'll be made to fit if it's new, or altered extensively and painstakingly if it's not. that means that tearing or staining a fancy dress isn't just an issue of looking bad - you can't just replace it, and you probably won't throw it out - you figure out how to reuse it. those concerns of access to material goods are just a lot closer to the surface of the world than they often are now.

my objections to modern attitudes about the world are not that people in the past 100% accepted the views of their contemporaries - there were always people who didn't, and it makes sense that a protagonist would be one of them. but people wouldn't phrase those objections in the same way that modern people would - say your main character doesn't want a woman accused of being a witch burned. "God's power is such that the Devil cannot give this woman the ability to sour milk" is most likely going to be more persuasive to the crowd than "witches aren't real." and sometimes that's rough - it's not super fun to read about a Roman with Roman attitudes about provincial wars, or slavery in the city, but I put something down because a Roman character said (in internal dialogue) that he was disgusted to see that a man had been tortured because "Romans simply didn't do that." Historical Romans did do that, routinely - a slave could not testify in a law court unless they had been tortured. Even with distasteful things like that, I'd much rather it just be glossed over than to have them say the "correct" modern thing. It just makes it feel too much like the theme park version of the culture.

Both of these are because of specific things I come to historical fiction for - I want that sense of alienation, the gulf of experience. I hate that most historical fiction (and fantasy set in semi-recognizable periods) characters don't really care about Honor, except as a joke, because I love when characters organize their lives around arcane rules and systems that cause tiny things to escalate into blood feud. I just think they're neat! I like it when people's worldviews are shaped by their lack of scientific certainty about what causes crops to fail! If I wanted to read about people who thought and acted like me, and had lives that were mostly similar to mine, only cooler, I'd just read contemporary fiction.

[eyesofshinigami]

Alley Oop

Rating: G

CW: None

Tags: Established relationship, supportive Wayne, sports talk, Eddie loves Steve

Prompt: For @sparklyslug "Love is secretly studying up on the nerd shit he's into" (I took it in a slightly different direction, but it was fun!)

WC: 709

Written for @steddielovemonth Day 11

Eddie thought he would get away with it. That no one would know. It could just be his little secret and then he could pull it out and impress Steve and show him that he does listen when he talks.

“What are you doing, boy?” 

Eddie nearly pops out of his skin, throwing the magazine over his shoulder and nearly braining Wayne with it. “What?! Nothing! I’m doing nothing!” he cries out, turning around and trying to act casual.

Wayne raises an eyebrow. “Then why are you acting like I just caught you with your hand in the cookie jar?” He folds his arms and pins Eddie with a look. “You know, I already told you I’m okay with you and Steve and what you get up to, as long as you-”

“Oh my god, no, Wayne. It’s nothing like that,” Eddie groans, letting his head thunk against the table. His uncle thinking he was looking at porn in the middle of their kitchen is almost worse than what he was looking at. “I’mreadingaboutsports,” he grits out quickly.

“What was that now?”

Eddie sighs. “I said… I’m reading about sports. Picked up some magazines from Melvald’s.”

Wayne looks at him like he’s lost his mind. “I don’t think I’m following, son.” 

“I’m trying to learn more about sports. You know. For Steve.” Eddie talked a lot of shit about sports in high school, knows deep down it’s not really his thing, but he can’t deny how much he loves how Steve gets when he gets to share his passion for them. For all that Steve talks about how dumb he is, the guy has a brain like a steel trap when it comes to statistics, plays, maneuvers, and players. He can recall how his favorite sports team fared ten years ago, he can calculate a batting average off the top of his head, and he can predict a play that a coach is going to call before the coach does. It’s frankly pretty impressive. How could Eddie not want to indulge that? “He’s been playing in my new campaign and having a lot of fun, so… I thought I would do the same for him?”

Wayne’s lips quirk up in a smile. “You asking me or telling me?” Eddie lets out a noise like a deflating balloon, which makes Wayne laugh. “I’m only picking at ya, boy. But I think that’s sweet. And I know he’ll appreciate it. You ought to see the way that he looks at ya when we’re all watching the game together.” 

That makes Eddie feel a little gooey inside. It makes him happy to know that other people see how happy they make each other. “Yeah. I want to like… understand what he’s talking about. It’s a lot more complicated than getting a ball in a laundry basket.” He chuckles, remembering the rant he sent Steve on when he said that. He’d been teasing, but when he thought back, he might have felt the same if Steve made a comment like that about one of his monsters or a plot he’d come up with. 

See? He’s growing as a person!

“Even if you don’t like it, it’ll mean something to him that you’re trying.” Wayne reaches out and ruffles Eddie’s hair, the same way he’s done since Eddie was a kid. “Y’all are good for each other. I was skeptical about that boy when you first brought him ‘round, but I see it now. You keep taking care of each other like this and it’ll work out just fine.” Wayne bends down and picks up the magazine from the floor and hands it back to Eddie. “Better get to studying. The Pacers game is next weekend and I bet Steve would appreciate a trip down to Indianapolis…”

With a wink, Wayne leaves him be. 

The wheels in Eddie’s head are already turning, thinking about how he can rope Robin into helping him get tickets. Maybe they can make a weekend of it, rent a hotel room and go out to dinner and just be with each other for a while.

Yeah, that sounds excellent. Eddie will get right on that, right after he learns the difference between a bank shot and a free throw.

[tales-of-wocdes]

How would Harvard and Lexia react if MC dropped something and said either f*ck or sh*t in the most innocent voice ever, all cause little innocent MC saw one of the other adults drop something and cursed lol?

(I absolutely love your game, it just sucked me in and I was so engrossed in the story ❤️ can't wait for the next update!)

Thank you! Happy to hear you liked it.

Let's go with sh*t (let's assume MC missed the word in C2). Lets call this one a celebration for a ~100 blog posts.

Thank you for all the interaction :D

----------------------------------------

The book drops from your hands and smacks against the white stone underneath.

"Shit." You heard one of the Silver Protectors say it just the other day when they dropped their gauntlet during lunch. You figured it was the thing to say when dropping something.

----------------------------------

Havard:

Havard is there in an instant, picking up the book and kneeling in front of you. He peers into your eyes, and gives a little smile.

"MC, do you remember our talk about bad words?" He asks calmly.

You stare at him. You recall the conversation. What does that have to do with anything? Still, you should probably nod. So you do.

Havard stares at you, as if searching for something. "You have no idea why I am asking about that, do you?" He asks, and you think there is a hint of mirth in his tone.

"No." You say tilting your head. You really have no idea.

Havard smiles at you, just like he always smiles.

"Well, the word you used is one of the bad words. You should not use it." He says.

It is? Why? Bad words are so confusing. What makes a word bad? How are you supposed to know which words are bad?

Havard must see your confusion.

"Don't worry about it. I am sure you will learn in time."

You sure hope so.

"Now please tell me where you heard that word." He is still smiling at you, but it feels a little... scary. You have a feeling that if you tell him, the Silver Protector you heard using the word will be in trouble.

----------------------------------------

Lexia:

Lexia saunters over and picks up the book. "Good word kid, but you do know Havard would not like you using it." She says, grinning a bit.

He wouldn't? Why not?

"It's one of those bad words kid. Remember?"

You stare at her. Bad words?.... Oh. You recall the conversation.

"Yeah. So avoid using it, especially in front of Havard. And Ethel. And Alessa." She winks and then frowns a bit. "Uh... kid? You did not learn that word from me did you?"

No it was not her. You did learn a lot of other words from her. Like f*ck! Still, you shake your head.

"Oh good. I don't want another lecture." She beams at you. "Do tell me who you did learn if from?"

-------------------

Havard and Lexia:

Havard and Lexia both turn to look at you. Havard glances at Lexia.

"Hey, it wasn't me this time!" She raises her arms. "I think." Havard sighs and comes over to you. He picks up the book and kneels in front of you.

[Pretty much the same as Havard one]

"So... were you telling the truth about where you learned the word from? Come on, tell me." Lexia whispers as Havard leaves the room. "And we should totally follow him. I want to see this. For once his glower is not directed at me!" She sounds gleeful.

Life is so complicated.

---------------------------

What conversation are they talking about? C3 might have something related to profanity.

[evdarlin]

School Kid Crush

*A/N okay so this is the first thing I've wrote since I was like 18 writing about one direction so I'm sorry if its complete dog shit. I tried and kinda want to make it a series maybe if people actually like it but yeah be easy on me pls*

From the moment that I met Spencer Agnew on my very first day at Smosh as the new Games PA, we instantly clicked. We would spend every lunch together quoting obscure movies or Family Guy. We hung out at each other’s apartments many weekends, me just watching him play video games or forcing him to watch Bridgerton with me. There was something there and I think we all could feel it. Spencer was always the one I could go to geek out about the things I always thought I was being annoying talking about. It was almost like I had met my other half which could only be explained as the most terrifying but best feeling in the world. The whole office knew that there was something there but I might be speaking for myself but I did not want to act on it solely from my own relationship problems and that we were coworkers and did not want to make things so complicated. So for now, we are just good good friends who might just be completely infatuated with each other.

Walking into the Smosh office on Friday morning felt like every other morning on the last day of the week. I didn’t get enough sleep and would rather have been curled up back in my bed asleep but someone has to pay rent. Once I arrived at my desk directly across from Courtney’s, I could see that some sweet angel had placed my dear alani drink right in front of my computer. There was only one person who could have brought that for me and I knew it was Spencer so I took off to the Games pod to thank him dearly. 

“Have I ever told you that you are a godsend and have saved my life on multiple occasions?” I say while walking up to Spencer’s desk.

“Well yes but have I ever told you that you are severely overdramatic with your words?” He said as he swiveled around in his chair.

“Alright that’s rude but I’ll let it slide since you brought me a drink sir.” I rolled my eyes and took a seat on the little couch in the small space. The office was pretty quiet this morning which is unusual but I welcomed it. “How long do you think it’s going to take before someone is yelling in here?”

“I say give it about ten minutes when Angela comes in and sees that she has to take care of that baby today” Spencer laughed and almost on cue heard Chanse cackling at Angela.

“Are you going to Courtney and Shayne’s combined bachelor party tonight?” Spencer suddenly looked nervous asking this question which is new for him around me that is.

“Yeah, I was going to head home after work to change then head over to the place, are you going?” I asked, praying and hoping he was going not wanting to miss a chance to hang out with him outside of these four walls of the Smosh office. 

“Well seeing as you just said you were going then absolutely I am. Um, can I pick you up and drive you to the party maybe?” There it was again, the nervous look on his face. 

“Of course!” I said maybe a little too fast and too enthusiastic, “I mean yeah that would be okay, that way I could have at least one or two drinks while I’m there.” I did not recover from that at all but maybe he won’t notice but seeing that smirk on his face, I am wrong.

“Then I will be there to pick you up at 7:30ish, does that sound okay?” Spencer asked, seeming to be a lot more relaxed now that I said yes.

“Sure! That gives me plenty of time, see you later Spen!” I gave him a small wave and walked back to my desk to get started on my small list of tasks I mentally gave myself to get done before filming started and I had zero free time until 5 p.m. As I walked back to my desk I was brought back to how nervous Spencer was asking me if he could drive me to the party. I mean we carpool sometimes to work and even ride together to function outside of the workplace so this shouldn’t be any different right? Oh god, is this a date? Does he know it’s a date? It can’t be a date when it’s Courtney and Shayne’s day right? I’m spiraling and don’t even notice that I ran right into Tommy.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry I wasn’t paying attention at all!” I stopped to make sure I didn’t cause some huge mess by running into him.

“It’s okay Y/N! You were really deep into thought there love, you doing okay?” Tommy asked with concern written all over his face, I suppose you can tell I was going through it up in my head.

“Uh well not really but I’ll be okay.” We both started walking towards our desks, I hoped to change the subject so I no longer had to think about what’s going on inside my head but Tommy had other ideas.

“Is it Spencer? I can totally fight him if you need me to or I can hide his Kickstarters until he apologizes to you.” Tommy giggled but stopped as soon as he saw how deep red my face had become.

“Wha- How did you know?” You mean to tell me the rest of the office knew how I truly felt about Spencer, shit.

“Oh honey, the man is completely infatuated with you and I also know you’re infatuated with him. I truly thought you guys were already together and just keeping it a secret for personal reasons. You know it’s okay to like him right? I know about the whole relationship problems you’ve had in the past but I don’t think Spencer is like that actually I know he’s not.” Tommy stopped walking to put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a little squeeze.

“Nope, nope, nope. You’re wrong, I know of no such infatuation you speak of Tommy Bowe.” I avoided eye contact the entire time but eventually sighed, “Is it that obvious?”

“Eh, kind of but hey it’s okay to like someone even if you guys work together. You guys have been attached at the hip ever since you started here and I think you might be the same person. I do not think he’s going to ghost you like every other piece of shit man who has entered your life.” Tommy knew more than maybe anyone about how much self doubt I have put on myself from constantly just men stopping talking to me out of nowhere. It didn’t matter if he said he was different, none of them were. They all were the same.

“I know he is a good person Tommy but I’m not sure I could deal with losing him as a friend and even worse I would have to see him every single day at work. I promise I’m just in my head a little bit, I’ll be okay.” I gave my most convincing smile and headed to my computer to start on my work for the day.

The work day honestly flew by without any more emotional spirals even at lunch when I could see Tommy giving me those knowing looks from across the table anytime Spencer did anything remotely nice for me. I left the office the minute it hit 5 p.m. just wanting to get out of there, I didn’t even wait for Spencer to walk with him in the parking lot. I needed to get to the comfort of my apartment and be alone before I had a full blown panic attack, not to mention I needed to get ready for this party. I made it home in record time with just enough time to get ready and sit in silence and think about what I should do. I decided to say screw it and just bring up my conversation with Tommy and see what happens. Do I know what’s going to happen? Not at all but you know what I need to do something to stop this spiral. I grabbed my bag and headed out the door was I saw that Spencer said he was outside. Spencer was waiting outside his car for me and even opened the door for me, what a gentleman. 

“You were nowhere to be found after work dude, where the hell did you go?” Spencer asked, closing the door as I settled into the front seat.

“Sorry, I started feeling bad so I had to get out of there. Hope you didn’t get attacked in the parking lot without your guard dog.” I laughed as he started his car and headed towards the place where the party was being held.

“You are literally shorter than me which is saying a lot but I was a damsel in distress and you just left me alone to die.” Spencer pretended to wipe a fake tear and looked over at me giggling. “But were you okay? Like nothing happened right?”

“Yeah I was fine, Tommy just got me thinking and I just got a little overwhelmed but promise I am perfectly fine now!” I smiled and let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding in. “It um actually was about you if I’m being honest?” 

“Me? I swear whatever it was I didn’t do it.” Spencer threw his hands up but I grabbed the wheel and gave him a glare.

“He did say that if you hurt my feelings he was going to hide your drinks until you apologize to me,” I looked over at him preparing myself for what I was going to say next, “He also said he thought we were together and were pulling a Courtney and Shayne”. 

“Hm, Tommy thinks we’re famous enough to hide our relationship like that? Wow, I am flattered.” Spencer laughed looking over at me then stopped because he realized this might be a serious conversation. “Wait, being in a relationship with me sounds so terrifying to you that you had to book it out of the office?” I looked over and saw that we had already arrived at the place but I knew our conversation was not going to end just because we were here.

“No! I just got in my head and was so scared that if you knew that I had this massive ass school kid crush on you, it would ruin this friendship we have built. I have no clue what I would do if you were not in my life, Spencer, honestly.” I realized I have just told him about this crush I have on him with my word vomit so there was no turning back now. “I like you alright, I like you a lot and it’s so damn scary because I’m terrified to lose you in any sense of my life.”

“A massive crush you say?” Spencer started giggling and all I could do was glare at him ready to smack that smirk off his face. “I like you too dummy, I thought you knew already and just saw me as your dorky coworker who also is your best friend. I promise you’re not losing me anytime soon. You’re stuck with me now babe.” He smiled and leaned over to give me a soft kiss. A kiss that I think I have been waiting for what felt like years, a kiss that seemed to let go over all of my insecurities and finally felt safe and confident in a relationship. “Now, let’s go into this party and steal Courtney and Shayne’s thunder.”

We started to walk to the door of the place, hand in hand, and ready to face all of our coworkers. The only thing you can hear as soon as we walked into the room was a far away “FUCK YEAH” which I can only place as Angela screaming.

[ronance4everbrainrot]

More little incorrect quotes from Descendants with CharmingHeart/Glassheart.

(and other ships)

Red: Amore, what does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?

Chloe: I don’t know, I love you, talk to you later.

Red: Alright, I love you too, I'll ask someone else.

Chloe: Wait- Red, no-

(Red didn't really know much about texting)

---

Red: A person can really hear themselves think out here.

Red’s mind: Did you leave the door unlocked? Does your mother actually love you!? WILL YOU DIE ALONE!?

Red: Well, that was a mistake.

(Beginners mistake, Red. You'll get there..)

---

Chloe: Okay, but what if we went to dinner not as friends this time?

Red: AS ENEMIES?!

Chloe:

(Chloe doesn't know if she wants to laugh or cry)

---

Red: That was so hot, Chloe.

Chloe: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.

Red: I'm so in love with you.

(Red loves this side of Chloe, when it's not directed at her)

---

Dizzy: Tell me a little about yourself.

Red: I'd rather not, I really like this group.

(Dizzy and Celia joined Red and Chloe's friend group. Dizzy is Chloe's cousin.)

---

Celia: Can I get a waffle?

Red and Chloe: *fighting and yelling at each other*

Celia: Can I p l e a s e get a waffle?

(Alternative Universe where there was no coup and Red and Chloe became roommates and get on each other's nerves a lot)

---

Red: Who wants to make fifty bucks?

Dizzy: How?

Red: I need someone to take the fall.

Celia: What did you do?

Red: I can't tell you. Yes or no, no questions asked.

Chloe, from the other room: Oh my god.

Red: ...

Chloe: OH MY GOD!

Celia and Dizzy: Make it a hundred.

Red: Deal.

(Same Universe as before)

---

*In a horror movie situation*

Dizzy: I've got no service in my phone here.

Chloe: Shoot, my battery just died.

Red: Sorry guys, I just broke my phone with a hammer.

Celia: Guys, my phone is a playing card.

(Damn. Bridget has been worry spamming her and Red couldn't take it anymore.)

---

Mal, to Evie: I mean, I get complimented all the time-

Carlos: *starts cackling*

Mal: I do!

Jay: *laughs harder*

(They love getting on her nerves)

---

Mal: A stake to the heart won't kill a vampire if their tits are big enough.

Carlos: Yeah, you just catch it.

Evie: Nah nah nah, deflects it. Stake? Just bounces right off. Done. Back to doing hot girl shit.

Jay: Then I just use a spear instead.

Mal: You are trying so hard to kill a vampire with big bazongas, and for what? Why would you do that to the ecosystem?

(Yeah Jay! Why? Like damn)

---

Jay: Who would you swipe right for? Audrey or Uma?

Mal: I would delete the app.

(Jay, stop. Evie and Mal just had a small fight. It's not a break up)

---

Jay: Mal and I are so close we even share a toothbrush.

Mal: We what?

(No Jay. Why. But true)

---

Mal: Do you love me?

Evie: We’re literally married.

Mal: Yeah, but as friends or—

(Mal, you're too insecure. Evie, kiss her insecurities away)

---

Mal: My dad has a spiked collar.

Mal: *dog

(wait let me fix this real quick)

Mal: My dog had a spiked collar when he was a teen.

Mal: *dad

(now)

---

Hope you like it.

Also I'm so glad I finally found other teenagers that Red and Chloe can hang out with other than their teen parents lol

Celia and Red would thrive

Ok byeeee

Edit:

I wanted to Google how old Celia and Dizzy were. I was thinking 12-13 and they are 13. And Red and Chloe are 16 but since there was a time skip from Descendants 3 to the Rise of Red. I thought they'd be the same age.

HOWEVER

The time skip was apparently 16 YEARS (which may have been mentioned at the beginning of the movie and I forgot. Idk) also that would mean Chloe and Red are born when descendants 3 ended or somewhere in that timespan. Damn.

Buuut I shall make Celia and Dizzy 16. Because I said so... We don't talk about the complications.

Ok byeee again

[autumnmobile12]

Ambush Simulation: Burnin'

Burnin': *clocks out* 'Kay, I'm headed out. I'm going drinking with the boss's kids and their weird vigilante friends at that bar owned by All Might's nephew.

Kido: ...there is so much going on in that sentence that I don't know how to tackle it.

...

...yeah, Burnin' and some of the other sidekicks might be another reason why the Vanguard gets away with so much.

Burnin': *runs down alley in pursuit of villain, ends up cornering the guy because Dabi happened to be coming from the other direction* "You patchwork dumbass, get the hell out of here before your dad sees you!"

Dabi: *makes offended hand gestures and dips*

...

Not really a topic I'm going to explore too much in The Summer Camp Ambush Simulation, but it is one that I may go into with other fics in the same au:

How much did Endeavor's sidekicks know/suspect what was going on with their boss's home life?

We don't really see their reaction to it in canon, which I think should have been shown. Because as it stands, it gives the impression they watched Dabi's broadcast, then saw Endeavor's public confession about what he did, and they seemed to collectively say, "Our boss was abusing his wife and kids for years. Oh well." And then they go and defend him as a good hero during Final War, which was objectively true, but I don't think saying that in front of two of his victims was a good look for any of them. It probably would have been better if we got a scene that showed they were taking Natsuo's stance of, "We're with Endeavor until this is all over, then we're out."

...

I imagine in canon that Endeavor keeps his private life strictly hidden from his professional one, but the Ambush Simulation au makes it a little more complicated with how Touya behaves. He's a vigilante, which has a lot of the sidekicks and other Pros questioning why he didn't just train to be a hero. Why is he so antagonistic with all the opportunities that were available to him? If he isn't coping with what happened to him, then does that mean he isn't receiving proper care and/or support?

All boiling down into the sentiment, "The boss's oldest kid is a shit. But we have questions."

...

Burnin' for sure knows at least a good chunk of the story.

A few years before the events of The Summer Camp Ambush Simulation, she did confront Touya about his 'spoiled, rich brat' behavior and got quite a bit more info from a very pissed off fire-user than she bargained for. And like everyone else adhering to Rei, Touya, Fuyumi, Natsuo, and Shouto's collective wishes to not have their private lives exposed in a public scandal (where their story will be scrutinized by the media, where they may be called liars and harassed by Endeavor's more die-hard fans, where the Commission may denounce them in order to cover for one of their top-performing Pros, where their lives will be completely upended with a myriad of foreseen and unforeseen consequences,) Burnin' reluctantly stays quiet about it.

"This is how I get ahead in life. I work with the No. 2 Hero and then I go drink and commiserate with his kids."

[suzukiblu]

Would you be willing to post a snippet of think pink? It's been a while since I've seen it on here and I would love to get some think pink crumbs

welllll since you asked so nice, friend . . .

Tim hasn't told him what to do this time, but Kon kinda already has a goal in mind here, so he just grins flirty and dirty at them both again and leans forward towards Tim, giving him a wink as he wags the unwrapped condom at him. 

"You still look good in green, right, man?" he asks teasingly. Tim visibly swallows, and Kon watches his pupils dilate. 

And he feels his cock twitch. 

Fuck, Kon loves his TTK. 

"I'll let you be the judge," Tim says. "Put it on me, pet." 

Kon is very, very happy to. 

He shifts forward a little farther and reaches out, feeling flushed and warm and weirdly . . . excited, almost, to have this. To get to touch Tim this intimately. 

Seriously, if he'd had any idea this was an option sooner . . . 

Well, it sure as shit would've happened a lot sooner. 

He wraps a hand around Tim's cock because he can't quite resist the urge to; can't quite hold back when he's got permission to touch him like this. Permission and encouragement to touch him like this, even. 

Kon feels way, way warmer at that thought. 

Tim inhales quietly. His cock feels weirdly good in Kon's hand; warm and hard and a perfect curve against his palm. Kon licks his lips without quite meaning to and wonders how it's going to feel in his mouth. 

And inside him. 

Fuck. 

He squeezes, once; gives Tim a stroke. Watches his face as he does it. 

Tim exhales, and takes a picture of him. 

Kon wonders what he looks like, if Tim wants a picture of it right now. 

"Fuck, man," Kon says, biting his lip around a grin; giving Tim another stroke or two to get him fully hard. "You always this pretty when you're getting jacked off? I've been missing out." 

"He gets prettier, actually, this is just stage one," Bernard informs him, and Kon resists the urge to squirm at the thought. "Stage one" implies multiple stages, after all. And Bernard mentioning those multiple stages implies Kon being around to get to see those multiple stages. "You should see him right after he's come, when he's all oversensitive and overwhelmed.” 

“Bernard,” Tim says, his voice mostly even but a little tight. 

"Can I see that, Tim?" Kon asks with absolutely every intention of doing so. Tim's face reddens, and his eyes go heated and dark. 

“If you're good for me,” he says, and Kon nearly bites his tongue. 

“Fuck you're hot,” he mutters, immediately taking that as his cue to hurry up and get the damn condom on him already. It's a little weird doing it from the opposite direction he's used to, but it's still something he's done a thousand times, and it's not like it's complicated: he just uses his TTK to make the gesture smooth and quick and do it without having to worry about getting any air trapped in the tip or any risk of tearing or anything. 

“Kon,” Tim says through his teeth. “Did you just use your powers to do that?” 

“Yeah?” Kon says, not sure why he's asking. They both just watched him do it, after all. 

“Do you usually put condoms on that way?” Bernard asks curiously. 

“Yeah,” Kon says. “Makes sure I won't accidentally rip it. And I mean, it's not any different from using my TTK on toys or–” 

“Ngh,” Tim says, putting a hand over his face. 

“Don't take this the wrong way, because just to be clear I love literally every word that has ever come out of your mouth,” Bernard says emphatically, gesturing at Kon as he speaks. “But please stop talking and start sucking off my boyfriend, like, yesterday.” 

Kon's gut twists with heat, and this time he definitely does bite his tongue. It's fine; his tongue is invulnerable. Like. Mostly. 

Fuck. 

���Tim,” he says, leaning in a little closer than he means to and giving his cock a few more exploratory strokes as he does, and the name comes out just a bit pleading. “I can, right? You'll let me?” 

Tim exhales roughly and drags his hand down his face, splaying his fingers to stare intently at him. Kon's gut twists up even tighter. He wants to kiss him again. He wants to knock him over and touch him everywhere and stay so much longer than a long weekend and just–

“Would you like that, pet?” Tim says, and Kon feels restless and overheated and just–hungry, for lack of a better word. 

“Yeah,” he says, swallowing at the thought. His mouth feels . . . it waters, almost. Feels . . . empty, almost. Eager. 

Greedy. 

He doesn't really know how else to put it. 

“Hm,” Tim says as he reaches out with a hand and threads his fingers into Kon's hair, and then curls them against his scalp and sort of . . . scritches, like he's petting a dog or a cat or something. 

Like he's petting him. 

Kon's every single higher thought process shorts out and he feels like an electric shock just went up his spine and through all his muscles and stays very, very still. 

He wants to say Tim's name. He wants to push into the contact. 

He wants Tim to tell him how to be good. 

“You know I want to give you things you like, pet,” Tim murmurs, and then he flattens his hand against the top of Kon's head and just . . . doesn't push or anything, but . . . 

Kon can lift literal tons without breaking a sweat and take a hit from a fucking train without even noticing the impact. He can withstand gravity that'd crush an unenhanced human and impacts that'd outright pulp them. 

The barely-there little weight of Tim's hand on his head is absolutely impossible to resist.

[malwaredykes]

honestly tbh leigh's relationship with the ncr is REALLY funny because. she hates them. she has 0 allegiance to them. she doesnt help THEM she resolves matters in ways that often happen to benefit them in some way or simply prevents needless loss of life, but it never is about them and aside from that shes always stealing, sabotaging, disrespecting them, turning people against them, encouraging members to desert, putting their legitimacy into question, especially the legitimacy of them being in the mojave in the first place, and exposing their ineffectiveness. she has 0 intention of venerating The Republic that she comes from. she thinks its hilarious that anyone should take that stuff seriously.

but she ends up being a celebrity to them. because crocker likes her despite everything, and hsu likes her, and because shes from new cali but important in the mojave, and because shes done stuff like calm things down in the freeside and help at refugee camps and retake nelson. which makes her even more of a problem in a way. if she were Only a nuisance thatd be one thing, theyd just put a bounty on her. but shes a celebrity. she has a status in new vegas and in the ncr. shes kind of untouchable. and her crimes and sabotage can never quite be proven. of course to the higher ups theres having proof and theres Knowing. shit only gets worse when she and her buddies storm the legion fort and kill caesar and free a bunch of slaves because like. this strengthens her vip status AND is absolute humiliation to the ncr. like they cant take the credit and instead they have to live with the fact that what a lot of them dismissed as some upstart with a bunch of clueless locals backing her did something they never couldve achieved. "oh this was pretty much an angry mob of townies and misfits" yeah and they got caesar in his own fortress. shes out there making the ncr look like shit and pointing people to seeing the ncr as the problem and yet she never does it in a way that she could be prosecuted for. by the time the ncr realizes shes a lot of trouble they also know they would lose a TREMENDOUS amount of support if they did something to her

like shes never openly hostile. she never provokes open hostility. shes not Openly Antagonistic to the ncr but its not exactly a secret shes got something planned and would like them to leave. young ncr recruits seeing her are like Omggg ma'am its an honor!!!! ^_^. there are officers and rangers whod be REALLY appalled if you said anything bad about her because Well she sure has done a lot more for us here on site than any of you government people. and that was her goal. that is the game shes playing. folks youll eventually realize its not the ncr that has done good in the mojave despite its flaws, but yours were the hands doing the work, and all the reasons one might consider ncr good or necessary are within you, Are you, the people who joined hoping theyd make a difference. folks youll realize that the ncr has to lie and obfuscate and make bullshit orders and directives to maintain claim over that good work and whitewash its own crimes. folks, i have this ex-ncr friend here. do you know what the ncr got him? complicity in atrocities (lyrical miracle), ptsd, apocalyptic thinking, countless biases to unpack, hopelessness, enemies where he shouldve made friends. and so on. and do you know what he got from *me*? a chance to actually do good. a chance to question those false beliefs of his. a friend. new opportunities. 40 rolls of duct tape. new rifle. lots and lots of soda. TWO toy trucks. and an apple. just ask him

[gabessquishytum]

Dream is the entitled, vicious third son of the city’s most powerful mafia family so when he sets his sights on hob, a bartender just trying to keep his head above water, it’s a recipe for disaster.

Hob works at a bar to pay off college debt, and he has one rule: he doesn’t sleep with customers. This is the kind of a bar where the staff is expected to dress and act a certain way and lots of his coworkers offer other services for money, and while hob doesn’t judge them, he doesn’t want that kind of complication. So he deals with the mild harassment with a smile, flirts for tips, and never lets it go further.

When dream first comes into the bar, it’s obvious that he is bad news. He’s surrounded by dangerous looking men but there’s something about the way they defer to dream that scares the shit out of everyone. Hob wasn’t even supposed to work the front but one of the others begged him to cover their section instead. Hob is a nice guy so he does it, and goes to serve Dream’s group.

When Dream first sets eyes on hob, tits pressed together in a leather corset, arse on display in booty shorts, he wants to get him in his knees. And it isn’t the first time he’s been to this bar, or propositioned the staff, so when he offers hob a wad of cash in exchange for a fuck, he fully expects hob to say yes. But hob doesn’t actually know who Dream is. So hob turns him down.

No one ever turns dream down.

Dream’s pissed, sure, but he’s also determined to own hob, no matter what it takes.

The next night he’s back with his lackeys. Hob sees him come in, predatory as a panther, and feels that cold stare on him as dream settles back at the same table. Hob ignores him. He is technically meant to be ending his shift but before he can, his manager comes over, pale and sweaty and tells hob he has to stay. He’s been personally requested by dream of the endless and no one wants to risk his wrath if they say no.

Hob knows that name and it finally clicks exactly whose attention he’s attracted. Fear makes his blood run a little cold but he doesn’t let it show as he goes back over and serves Dream’s group all night long. Dream barely drinks his vodka martini but watches hob running around all night.

Finally, hob asks Dream if the drink isn’t to his liking. And right in front of him, dream pours his martini out all over the table.

“Clean it up,” he orders hob in that low, hypnotic voice.

“I’ll get a rag,” hob murmurs but Dream’s men close ranks around him.

Dream sits forward. The music pounds between them. “a bottle of that vodka costs more than your month’s rent. Don’t let it go to waste. Lick it up.”

Hob burns with humiliation but he doesn’t exactly have a choice. So he kneels beside the table and starts to lap at the vodka. It isn’t long before a strong, bony hand fists in his hair. Dream doesn’t direct hob, but just feels him move.

By the time he’s done, the table isn’t clean, but there is vodka in hob’s hair, on his chest, and he’s so pissed off he could scream.

“Let me have you,” Dream says. He looks drunk, not on any alcohol, but on the sight of hob following his orders. Humiliated at his hands.

Hob rips away from him. “I’m not for sale.”

“Last night’s offer expired,” Dream replies. “I won’t be paying for you. Not now.”

But he lets hob go, lets him stumble into the bathroom to clean off. Hob doesn’t come back: he sneaks out of the club and sprints home. But it’s too late. There’s nowhere to run in this city that Dream can’t find him. He already knows his name and where he lives. Sooner or later, he’ll have him.

Mini fic in my inbox time!!!! FUCK YEAH this is such a good setup, I LOVE how mean and entitled Dream is, I love the dubcon of it all... yes please.

I'm imagining all the things that could happen. Maybe Dream buys the entire block of flats where Hob lives so now he even controls his home, maybe he psyches him out by playing with the rent - one minute Hob’s getting a letter saying his monthly rent is now only $1, next minute there's another letter increasing the rent to $10,000 per month. Hob is tearing his hair out. Of course Dream gives him a way out of it all - if Hob comes to live in the suite Dream set up for him, he won't have to pay anything. Dream even tries to buy up the bar where Hob works, but it either belongs to one of the other gangs or one of his siblings already, so he can't have it. It's not much of a relief to Hob though. Dream is still in there every night, humiliating Hob and demanding "services".

The worst part of all this is that Dream is... hot. Smoking hot and fucking gorgeous, and Hob would be so ready to jump into bed with him... if he didn't have such an abysmal personality. He makes Hob’s dick want to shrivel up. Most of the time. Except there are moments, when Dream shows up to collect Hob from a late shift at the bar so he doesn't have to walk home and potentially get stabbed.... that's kind of nice. And Dream sometimes sends flowers (usually with a threatening note, but still).

He has a horrible feeling that he's going to get used to all this... and that Dream will get him eventually. Its just a matter of time.

[eastgaysian]

Sorry this is a dumb question but can you explain why tomshiv is not abusive? Shiv seems to hit a lot of textbook behaviours of emotional abusers

thank you for your follow up clarifying this was in good faith bc i checked my inbox yesterday right after getting high and was like man come on. don't do this to me. but yeah i can talk about it, it's obviously something i have a fair amount of thoughts on

on a fundamental level, i take issue with the assertion that there are 'textbook behaviors of emotional abusers' in the first place. distilling abuse down to a set of behaviors is, imo, effectively meaningless and totally unproductive. it's not the behavior of an individual that defines abuse, it's a specific and intentionally cultivated imbalance of power and control within a relationship. victims of abuse can and do resort to survival mechanisms that could be considered in isolation as 'abusive behavior', the point is that you can't consider them in isolation. there's a gulf of difference between the same actions when they're coming from a person in a position of significant financial or physical or social power over someone else, or when they're coming from the person at a disadvantage.

i think viewing abuse as a set of behaviors also encourages you to treat interpersonal abuse as if it's discontinuous with systemic abuse, which is inaccurate and unproductive. a key part of succession's premise is that, because the family is literally the business, the familial abuse within the roy family is inextricable from the broader systems of capitalism, patriarchy, and the sexual violence and abuse endemic to them. with regards to how the show satirizes and critiques these systems, i think it's very telling that all of the characters are to some degree complicit and/or participants in abuse, but logan is the only one i'd say is unambiguously and intentionally presented as 'an abuser' (whose abuse is not an isolated product of him as a person, but integrated into/inseparable from the capitalist system which persists after his death). still, logan isn't reduced to a one-dimensional angry, abusive dad, he's given depth and complexity. his continued insistence that he loves his children isn't treated as something that's untrue, but that doesn't make it inherently good, and it certainly isn't incompatible with him abusing them.

circling back to tom and shiv. their relationship is unhealthy, it's not good for either of them to be married, shiv does fucking awful things to tom and tom does awful things right back, i'm not questioning any of that. but at my most cynical and bitchy, what it comes down to is quite simply: shiv doesn't have enough power over tom to be abusive, systemically or personally.

the thing is sometimes you see people say 'wow, if the genders were reversed people would say tom and shiv's relationship is unambiguously abusive!' which... hrm, but really the issue is that. the genders are the way they are, that's for a reason, and yes, that does make a significant difference in how we perceive their relationship and power dynamics. tom holds very real and present power over shiv as a man and as her husband, proposing to her when she was vulnerable in a way that placed huge pressure on her to accept and then trying to get her to have his baby so he can become patriarch. shiv's the heiress with the legitimacy of her family name and generational wealth but she is continuously, unavoidably subjected to gendered discrimination and violence. she's never allowed direct access to real power - she has to rely on the men around her, her husband or her brothers, and if they don't feel like humoring her she's shit out of luck.

this doesn't cancel out like a math equation, but it definitely makes things much more complicated than shiv being an Evil Bitch Wife to her Poor Pitiful Husband. when shiv finally does push tom too far, he immediately, successfully, goes over her head to her abusive father to fuck her over. maybe shiv wants to be her father in her relationships and exert the same kind of control he does. but she doesn't and she can't! she does not have that power! she cannot stop tom from kicking back and his hits are significant. as much as she might like to pretend otherwise, tom not only has always had the power to leave in a way shiv doesn't, he had and has the power to fuck her up badly, and he's used that power. that is simply not the power dynamic between abuser and victim to me.

i also have to say that abuse is not always going to be definitive black and white. in real life there are plenty of unambiguous situations but there are also plenty of complicated situations, and applying judgments to fiction is not always straightforward. i can't exactly call someone 'wrong' for personally being uncomfortable with tom and shiv's relationship or believing shiv is abusive, but i'm very skeptical of the viewpoint and the motivations or assumptions that are often contained within. if shiv is abusive, she definitely isn't uniquely so among the cast, so you had better be applying that label and any associated moral judgments equally across the board.

[vashtijoy]

when is a rival not a rival?

I want to have a look at the word that’s used for rival here. That’s 好敵手 koutekishu. Also, let’s talk a bit more generally about how Akechi relates to Joker.

First of all, look at those kanji. We’ve got 好, meaning liking, preferred, good, pleasing, or even love. We’ve got 敵, “enemy”. Lastly, we’ve got 手 for arm or hand, but that’s part of the base word 敵手 tekishu—a rival or an enemy, or one of two well-matched enemies.

So what do we get if we make it a “good enemy”, a koutekishu? ejje.weblio tells us it’s an arch-rival, or a worthy opponent. It is distinct from the English word ライバル, “raibaru”, in that it doesn’t mean “a nemesis who is always at odds with you”. raibaru is the word Joker and Akechi typically use—a semi-friendly “let’s get each other”—but at these two intense moments very near the end, it gives way to a statement of something very much more. 

koutekishu is an old word. It gives the statement a formality; it gives it weight; it gives it a literary quality. Note that this isn’t Akechi saying this, with all his formality; it’s Joker. And the more common equivalent usage today is いいライバル ii raibaru—literally, “good rival”, with the 好 of koutekishu substituted for ii, meaning “good”. Does that more modern usage appear anywhere in P5? Well, yeah, since you ask.

Akechi こんな立場じゃなきゃ、いいライバル同士になれたのかもね⋯ konna tachiba ja nakya, ii raibaru doushi ni nareta no kamo ne... Under different circumstances, we could have been great rivals... or perhaps even friends. [lit. If we weren’t in this situation, maybe we could have come to share a worthy adversary relationship.] Imagine if things had been different. The fun we could have had, fighting each other. We might even have been friends.

ii raibaru doushi ni nareta means “we could have become each other’s worthy adversaries”. and it is so stunningly hard to put into sensible English that I’m just going to take liberties out the wazoo with my own translation, which is the bit in bold.

“great rivals” looks like a misreading of ii raibaru. But I like the localisation’s “rivals or perhaps friends”; it sums up the nature of a “worthy adversary”. You like them, you respect them, or you find them fascinating; you wish they could fight alongside you, but because of irreconcilable differences, you oppose them forever. Don’t forget Akechi’s repeated “you truly are interesting”, 君は面白い kimi wa omoshiroi and variants: “you’re interesting, you’re fun!”. Akechi thinks Joker is fascinating. “You’re so interesting” is something I’m sure he says to a lot of people he needs around, of course—but over the course of the year, it becomes true.

So Akechi takes a moment here to think about what might have been, before he puts it behind him—forever, as he intends it to be.

akechi and his reluctant worthy adversary

[oh so many screencaps below the cut]

Akechi’s language repeatedly hammers home this idea of the “worthy adversary”.

Here’s confidant stage 7. This is the first of the four end stages, where everything goes to shit: Akechi has his kill order, we’re into Sae’s palace, and the plan is in motion. Yet in this confidant stage, he seems to give Joker not one but two chances to back out—that is, of course, to prove unworthy of him. Because, as long as Joker is worthy, this fight only ends when one of them is dead—and if Joker is unworthy, then he isn’t deserving of Akechi’s attention or interest.

First, he tells Joker things are in motion that he cannot control—or perhaps, that neither of them can control. Maybe it’s yet another of the parallels he sees between the two of them; Akechi’s path, after all, has struck quite a few obstacles he likely never intended, of which Joker is only the most recent—because back in July, he was still telling the SIU director that the Phantom Thieves would inevitably self-destruct, without his direct involvement. Things are far more complicated now (don’t forget confidant stage 8 is next), but this is still not where Akechi intended this to go, earlier in the year.

Note the sad sprite. I come and go on these; I used to think the very emotional sprites were always performative, but I think I’ve changed my mind. This seems like a point that’s genuinely bothering him, that he has to manage away.

Then there’s the next one, at the end: Akechi offers Joker the chance to dump his friends, do a heel turn, and join him. You can’t actually do this; he seems kind of shocked that he’s misread you, if you agree to think about it. But he wants to see if you would do it:

Of course, Akechi can’t accept, even if he really wants to; even if Joker turns out to be kind of a slimy turncoat there being room for only one of those per game But (and this is to do with quite another facet of Akechi) by giving Joker two chances to back out, Akechi has done something else: he’s shifted the responsibility for Joker’s death onto Joker. Joker’s had every chance to walk away, and he hasn’t done it. You can’t say Akechi didn’t try—and now their fight is going to go all the way....

Here’s the “worthy adversary” chat, from the same scene. Akechi gives Joker the “we are so similar and yet we are on opposing sides” speech. They are, of course, and some of it IMO really is because Akechi is playing detective:

Lastly, here’s confidant stage 8, with Akechi adopting his fucking side-on "I will shoot you now” pose to throw the glove, lol:

Like, seriously: 

SERIOUSLY:

anyway I do love all of this. From the end of confidant stage 2 onwards, this is the softer side of what’s going on in Akechi’s head. This is how, until he’s stripped of his masks in the engine room, he is interpreting their whole relationship: Joker is Akechi’s nemesis, his equal and opposite, the only one who can match him—but who he can never allow to match him. Joker is Moriarty to his Holmes—because it’s all part of his detective fantasy, one of the fantasies that inflates him.

And as long as all that is there, he can’t properly see anything else he may feel. Everything that happens goes into that framework for him, where he’s caught up in a great rivalry with one of the very few people he truly notices. While Joker, of course, is down for the rival thing, but can’t approach the intensity Akechi affords it, because... well... I think we all know why.

[ungodly-amounts-of-godly-trauma]

wotw round 1

propaganda under the cut!

anders:

So for context as to Why This Has Happened, he does happen to be an incredibly controversial character because of bad writing and that time he blew up a catholic church (complicated), so a lot of fans, even fans who otherwise wouldnt do so, of him swung HARD in the other direction of "he has basically no flaws at all" which is. Not True. Even if you agree with the blowing up a church thing. He is RUDE and MEAN and HAS BOUNDARY ISSUES. also he js very much the epitome of Extremely White activist and doesnt know how to communicate unless he is arguing (he is not good at arguing and he does not like doing it. these conflicting traits cause exactly the amount of problems you think it would).

Now are these various issues he has generally due to "forcibly imprisoned in a cult", "a year of solitary confinement", and "hes mentally ill and his writer is incredibly ableist"? Yeah for sure. But that doesnt mean the solution is to scrub every flaw he has away or pretend like they dont matter or blame it on the (very cool and sweet) guy possessing him (willingly) its SO uninteresting. And then if you try to talk about these flaws you get people excitedly talking about how they always without fail kill the passively suicidal man and how his romance is inherently abusive to the pc or some shit. Im DYING out here

link:

I know this is like really minor but it bugs me SO much. Ok so. At the beginning of the game, Link gets woken up by Zelda. She calls him a sleepyhead. Later in the game, she references that he would oversleep sometimes. Some of the other npcs do this also. Fandom decided that this was one of his only personality traits, being a sleepy little soft guy who loves his girlfriend soooo much (ok, he does love her a lot, but that's not the point).

This just makes me so upset because he. is. not. sleepy.

Oversleeping doesn't make you sleepy! Many fics portray him as someone that's very soft and gentle and kind and can fall asleep anymore!

At the very most, he's tired. He pushed himself hard during his quest, losing sleep. Afterwards, he would probably go back to a regular sleep schedule and sleep fine (barring nightmares). This is a very different thing than sleepy!

Anyway. Next point. Soft and gentle. He is a kind person, he's on a time sensitive quest and he'll stop to help a mother find her lost child, help a demon become human, find a LOT of lost things, all sorts of stuff like that, but he is not soft and gentle. At the very beginning of the game, he tells the bully "nice hair" (it's kinda ridiculous). Many of his answers are short and blunt. He says "not that guy" when he has to enlist the help of someone he doesn't like. He broke a chandelier for the equivalent of five dollars. He eavesdropped on a private argument-- like literally if you walk by the house at the right time control is taken from the player and he'll walk towards and listen to it. He tells a guy that his elder is dead just for shits and giggles (he's not).

Anyway. Fandom, of course, remembers none of this. He's the peacemaker, he's the soft and gentle one, he falls asleep whenever possible-- he is none of these things! The only thing they get right is that he loves Zelda!

I just want the fics where he's properly snarky and rude and tired (of this bullshit), is that too much to ask?

[sugoi-and-spice]

Answering the other part of this Q from @hunajan in a separate post rather than a reblog because...

Well, you'll see why lol.

This is SUCH a great question!

So yeah, when I was expanding this fic, and realized that I wanted it to be a story with deeper meaning, rather than just a straight up fetish-y dubcon/noncon fic (which there's nothing wrong with, it's just not the direction I wanted this story to go), and when I decided that I did indeed want Shigaraki and MC to be endgame - I knew that there was A LOT of work that was going to need to happen in the story, and from Shigaraki's end, to make that possible.

As a quick disclaimer, in real life, I do not think Shigaraki and MC's relationship would be salvageable. Dear readers, if your relationship with a person starts with a freaking sexual assault or a place of this deep of manipulation - fucking run, don't walk lol.

Buuuut, this is fiction, and I love writing about effed up characters trying to make each other's lives a bit less effed up, so yeah, this is a romance that I intend to give a happy ending.

Of course, I still don't want to make a happy ending easy for them. I fucking love me a character arc, and Shigaraki in this fic has one hell of a character arc to go through, one of the biggest steps of which is taking accountability and doing some serious fucking atoning.

So to answer the question, no, Shigaraki's realization and apology wasn't particularly difficult to write or plan out, but it was something I was very careful with and definitely put a lot of thought into. And so my first step in crafting this plot point was to look at one of my favorite atonement arcs in media:

Endeavor's!

*nervously* Hahaha, I can hear the pitch forks sharpening already. A lot of people really hate this character and claim he has a shit redemption arc, but I couldn't disagree more tbh.

I think the most important aspect of atoning is accepting the fact that forgiveness must happen on the other person's terms - if it's granted at all. And if the person you've hurt doesn't ever forgive you, accepting that as well.

Endeavor's attempts for atonement are not perfect ones at first. He tries at first to mend his relationship with his kids, very much on his own terms:

This is not a flaw with the arc mind you, imo, but an intentional flaw of the character. The rocky beginning on his road to atonement.

Because ultimately, mending the relationship, earning forgiveness, building a new life with his family - those are all things that he wants. They are things that would serve him, would make him happy. But that's not necessarily what's actually best for his family.

What's best for his family, is to free them. Separate himself from them so that if they decide to forgive and move forward with them, they can do it on their terms.

^This right here is the scene that really brough My Hero Academia from good to great in my eyes. And made me realize how amazingly poignant Horikoshi was when it comes to telling stories about trauma and complicated family dynamics. It was such an amazing show of growth, maturity, and genuine care for his family, to want them all to just heal and be happy, even if that means he's not a part of it.

That's some damn good freaking atonement right there imo. And admittedly, it's probably due to some personal bias.

To be tmi for a sec, I have a lot of experience with abusive people, and abusive parents specifically. I am no contact with my father and very low contact with my mother. They are people who have done fucking terrible, awful things to me in my life and quite regularly, just expect me to forgive them without them putting any real work into changing things. They want me to forgive on their terms and their terms only, and they absolutely fucking expect forgiveness. Because that's what family does.

Bullshit.

I can't tell you how much in my life I've wanted to hear them say:

I think that is the pinnacle of an actual good apology honestly, and particularly when apologizing for doing truly horrendous things. It's to just reach out to people, say I'm sorry, you don't have to forgive me, but I am fucking sorry - I take full responsibility for your well-being and what I've put you through,. And then to work on making things better for others, and improving yourself going forward. No pushing, no love-bombing, no trying to make it up to them directly. To just lay it all out on the table and accept the consequences.

There's a reason that the 9th Step in AA is "making amends" and not "asking for forgiveness."

Sooooo, to bring it away from this Endeavor meta tangent, and back to your actual question - that's what I decided needed to be at the forefront of Shigraki's apology in Play Nice. Not the literal words "I'm sorry", but this part:

His willingness to walk away if that's what she wanted and was best for her, even if doing so made his own life noticeably worse. The promise to not cause her anymore of that pain, no matter what it takes - that's what really needed to happen here I think to make their relationship salvageable honestly. That's what I really wanted to highlight.

[lexusiswriting]

A love you deserve (Ricky Olson) - Part 10 of ?

Hi guys!

Apparently, I got more ideas, so who knows how many parts we have left, lol. Enjoy! <3

Warnings: none.

Tags: @multifandomcrackhead, @nicelittlenightmares, @roll-tide-babe89, @skulliecadaver-blog, @21-century-tae, @melissa-anderson, @abiomens, @w743, @insanitywulf, @awkwardalex, @philomenie

Requests: OPEN.

_________________________________

“Why tell me first?”

Lexus’s point of view

That’s what I was asking myself before I did it, but now, hearing the question out loud, it was even more complicated to answer it. For the moment I felt like I could trust him with this secret, but now I realized it was a way to give me courage. Yes, the papers were already signed before he got here, but my mind couldn’t fully process that my marriage was officially done.

“Don’t think I did it so you could feel better about this situation. Or to give you any hints. You brought this up in our conversation and I had the need to let you know.”

“Do you want to talk about it? Maybe it will help you somehow.”

“It’s a lot to say, and now it’s not the time.”

“What about tonight at dinner?”

I expected him to shoot his shot, but not this fast.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea, Ricky.”

“Look, I promise you it’s not a date. We are just two friends who have a lot to catch up. And one more promise, I won’t try to do anything, without your consent, of course.”

A little laugh escaped my lips, which made his eyes shine a little with hope. That part of him that could win the heart of every woman did not change.

“Alright, I guess talking while having dinner won’t hurt us. But it’s not a date.”

“Noted. I’ll pick you up at 8.”

Ricky’s point of view

Saying that I was on cloud nine would not compare to the feelings I had at that moment. I closed the door of the office behind me, hoping it was not a dream. When I was close to the lobby, I heard a very familiar voice – it was Corey.

“Hey Ricky, didn’t expect to see you here.”

We know each other for some time now, so we were no strangers. I can’t count how many concerts or tours we did together.

“Happy to see you, man. Yeah, Motionless signed with Lexus today. We will be here a lot.”

I could feel how weird it was for the both of us. Lexus’s now ex-husband talking with her ex-friend with benefits.

“Congrats, but be careful, she will work the shit out of you.”

The whole thing was weird, and I waited patiently for him to leave me alone. But then I was stricken by a question – why was Corey here? I was trying to find something else to say, maybe to find the answer to this question, but I was glad he did it first.

“Well, I have to go now, need to get some documents from Lexus. But actually, I wanted to talk to you for a long time.”

“Talk about out?”

“There’s a lot to say, and I don’t want to risk being heard by Lexus. How about meet me at the café around the corner in 10 minutes?”

“Sure, I’ll see you there.”

He went towards Lexus’s office without adding anything else. There was nothing in my mind about what he wanted us to talk about. I get that he is upset, maybe angry with this situation, but I hoped he was not blaming their divorce on me.

________________________________

While I was waiting in the café, my mind made a lot of bad scenarios. What if he thinks she cheated on him with me? Does he know we lost contact for years, way before they got married? Did our contract make him think she knew we were coming and that’s why she signed their divorce papers today? I was truly afraid and for a moment I was about to go home, when I saw Corey coming in my direction.

“Sorry for keeping you waiting. It’s a really delicate situation.”

The only thing I did was to nod and to get a little sip from my coffee. It hasn’t been a minute yet, but my anxiety was over the top.

“I guess you know already that Lexus is going to be the star of our conversation. Don’t worry, you’re not involved in it. All I’m just trying to do is to warn you.”

“What do you mean?”

“As you were the only one to come out of the office, I’m sure she told you the news about our divorce. Again, I know you don’t have anything to do with this.”

“Yes, she said she signed the papers today.”

“Right… Let’s just say that if you want to try again with her, I don’t mind it. It hurts, of course, but if she’s happy, I will be happy for her as well. Especially because I haven’t seen her smile in a long time.”

“But she said that you both agreed to divorce. Because things were not working out between you two.”

“If it was for me, I would’ve never divorced her. I love her and our daughter with my whole being. She was the only one who thought this was the only solution.”

As I was hearing two completely different stories, I tried to see which one made more sense. Corey was devastated and even now he talked about Lexus with so much care and love, while she had no feelings left for this man.

“Look, Corey, I’m sorry for this. I never wished something like that would happen to you. The problem is, I truly don’t understand why am I here.”

“Because I analyzed everything from the moment, I met her until now. You know what I noticed? The things that happened between you two are still affecting her to this day.”

“This can’t be possible. In this case, she wouldn’t’ve married you in the first place.”

“She did it because she found in me something you did not have at the time: stability. I told her I wanted to get married, to have kids, and saw in me exactly what she wanted to have with you.”

Apparently, I was implicated in their marriage without knowing it. Maybe not even Lexus acknowledged it. I ran my hand through my hair, thinking how badly I fucked up her life.

“Ricky, listen to me. If you want her back, this time in a serious way, think really good about it first. She has a child now, my child. Fooling around is not something she would do now. Only do it if you are ready to love her and to make her happy. I don’t know if she can go through that pain again.”

“Why do you think she would actually want me back in her life?”

He laughed a little, even though he had tears forming in his eyes.

“Because she never loved me. Yes, she cared about me, but the feeling of love was reserved already by you. She married me thinking she would finally forget you, but apparently, it was not the case. Her heart is still full of you, Ricky.”

[gayofthefae]

Mike's actions have all been in character. They are only out of character depending on when you defined his character and how rigidly. If you rigidly defined him in your mind in season 2 then yeah no shit he's different. But his actions are consistent to a person, it's just that his state of mind has changed.

Imagine if you had rigidly defined Steve in season 1. Him changing as a person would look the same as being "out of character". When really it's just that his environment/circumstances have changed to allow him that growth.

In the same way but a different direction, when Mike's circumstances complicated, he became more stressed and defensive. But this is something he always had been to a degree. See: his fight with Lucas in season 1.

He actually became better in his skills and worse in his situations over the seasons. Season one - situation: missing Will (bad but straightforward), skills: he was stubborn and refusing to see Lucas' side. Season four - situation: unable to say I love you, skills: he initiating a resolving conversation calmly and inquired while assuming good intent when El said something that could have been taken poorly ("you don't understand [my bullying experience]"). Note how the inability here was the situation not his issue. Does it still totally suck and hurt El? Yes! Did he handle the situation wrong? Arguably no, if those were his limitations in the moment.

A simple situation that takes longer than it should to resolve can hurt less because you can more easily see why everyone did what they did in the end.

A complicated situation dealt with to the best of a character's ability can hurt more because the reasoning is hard to understand for all characters involved, including the one trying to maneuver it. That doesn't make it the character's fault.

Mike has grown. You just can't see it because his person and his situations are going in opposite directions. He's dealing with worse situations a hell of a lot better. And he's doing it all in character.

His situations are inconsistent. Not his person.

(I feel that I should also had the little note that in season 1 he kissed El when he couldn't verbally tell her how he felt and then oh looky here in season 4 it's "out of character" for him to not be able to tell her how he feels. No it's not. It was just only upsetting once.)