#he’s clearly sacrificed love (albeit familial) for God before

[despexco]

Imagine spending your whole life being 100% solely focused on one thing. Being so absolutely convinced that you’re right that you’re willing to sacrifice those around you because it’s for the greater good.

Then imagine falling in love with some random guy and being able to recontextualize ALL of it. It’s insane.

Somehow Supernatural managed to give Michael a whole ass character arc in the span of like two episodes over 10 years.

[alpines-bucky]

No one said Starks weren't a little dramatic

This is the first time I write Tony x daughter reader I hope you guys like it :)

Word Count: 2319 ( Things got a bit out of my hands while I was editing and eventhough it's edited I can't promise that there aren't any typos and I dtill wasn't satisfied with what I wrote but 🤷‍♀️Ig )

Warnings: Major character death, a lot of angst

Y/N loses her dad when he decides to save the universe with a snap of his fingers but when did anyone see a Stark not getting what they want? Let me answer for you, Never. ( AKA Y/N gambles with time and space and universes surprisingly there isn't any VA involved cause in my opinion they suck to save her dad but apparently there are always consequences)

Y/N had arrived at her destination albeit being a little late. She wanted to be there when the team tried to go back in time to get the Stones in hopes of saving aunt Tasha too but she had one and only shot at this so she had to make do with what she had. What she didn’t realise was she accidentally changed universes instead of going back in time.

The way she found out that the place she had arrived wasn’t when or where she intented to was Morgan, the little girl with big Brown eyes who had total control over her older sister the second they met. Y/N had to lay low and do her research before approaching them. But when she heard about Morgan she had to meet her before doing what she came to do. And that’s exactly what she did.

She found Morgan in a house by the lake with a woman who she assumed was Pepper.Her visit was short since she couldn’t afford getting caught by Pepper which would mean jeopardising the whole plan she had spent months making. She left a message for her dad before going off to save the man itself.

Her dad was fighting with Thanos when she arrived to the scene. The more she looked around the more it looked like the place she fought along with her dad and that meant one thing, she had to act quick.

‘’I am inevitable’’ Thanos said as he snapped his finger but nothing happened. Confused, he looked at his gauntlet to find that the Stones that were there a minute ago were no longer in their places. He looked around to see that Tony had them somehow.

‘’And I’m Iron Man’’ said Tony full of emotions as he was about to snap his fingers. He thought having all six Stones in his hands would kill him being a mortal and he was fine with it if that meant she could ensure his family’s security but he felt nothing. He thought he had died instantly but he found out that wasn’t the case when he got startled by an unknown voice.

‘’Oh, the hell with that!’’ said a girl who wore a similar suit to Tony’s. She seemed to appear out of nowhere. Which confused both man further.

‘’Who the hell are you?’’ asked Tony. Who the hell was mad enough decided to mess up the only chance of him stopping the big purple psycho of a man.

‘’Who do you think?’’ said the girl, winking at him confidentally but her eyes told a different story. There was sadness in them, grief and loss but it seemed like she was happy at the same time.What surprised him was the familiarity she carried but he couldn’t put his finger on it. So he searched her suit for some clues which led up to him finding the Stones. She was the reason he was not dead, she somehow got possession of the Stones.

‘’Kid, no!’’ yelled Tony. He attempted to get closer to her but she snapped her fingers before he could stop her. Everything stilled for a second. The other avengers thought Tony had done it as Thanos’ soldiers had started to turn to dust all of a sudden but when they found a girl that they’ve never seen before in the arms of Tony with fetal injuries they were puzzled. They gathered around Tony and the girl who struggled tos tay alive.

‘’I made it! I… I saved you, Dad.’’Tony was shocked at her words. He was processing what he heard as Pepper landed next to them and kneeled. They couldn’t Wrap their heads around what was happening but they both were not going to let a dying kid down for sure.

She had a difficulty breathing, she was in agonizing pain but she had a peaceful smile on her face. She tried to lift her hand but it pained her more, she whimpered. Tony sensed her intentions and put her hand on his cheek for her. He put his hand on top of her, gave it a gentle squeeze. ‘’Friday, what do we have?’’ asked Tony.

‘’3 to 4 degree burns from her right hand up to her face. Internal bleeding. Her lungs are collapsing... Life functions critical.’’ Answered the voice from both of the suits. Pepper grimaced, she didn’t know who this girl was but she had sacrificed herself for Tony, the man she referred ‘dad’. ‘’Who are you?’’ asked Pepper.

‘’I’m–‘’ she coughed, blood was pooling in her mouth. ‘’I’m surprised you couldn’t figure it out yet…’’ she let out a bloody laugh. ‘’I’m Y/N. Y/N Stark.’’ She said with her last breath. That shook the whole group to their cores. The girl wasn’t lying or confusing Tony with someone else. The girl who lied in his Tony’s arms nonbreathing was infact the daughter of Tony Stark. From the moment they realised the truth everything was a blur to the Stark Family and the avengers.

Y/N was Tony’s first daughter who had died in a cross fire 7 years ago. She was a teenager at the time. She would have been a few years older than Peter if she had lived. It was a wrong place wrong time type of situation, she had died on the scene. Tony had nightmares after that, his insomnia got worse. He had blamed himself although it had nothing to do with him. The guilt ate him alive day by day. He realised why the girl’s eyes were so familiar to him now, she was his Y/N/N. A grown, older version of her, but his Y/N nontheless.

He didn’t think he could recover from her death but losing her, seeing her die in his arms for the second time ruined him. He had no idea what was happening outside of his head, he was in a trance, he had stayed still looking at his hands where Y/N laid. Until his little girl, Morgan came up to him with a disk in hand and said ‘’Daddy! Daddy! A girl called Y/N wanted me to give this to you’’ That got everyone’s attention.

Tony told Friday to scan the disk and display whatever is in it. When he saw Y/N in front of her, he couldn’t stop the tears from falling and when she started speaking as if she could see her Tony lost it. He couldn’t hear her because of his own sobs, he didn’t even realised the rest of the avengers and his wife as they piled in the room when they heard Tony and Y/N’s voice. He had to stop the hologram a few times to gather himself. When he got control of his breathing, he built up his courage and displayed it all over again.

‘’Hey dad. I’m assuming since you are watching this I suceed. I’ve saved you.’’ She had to stop for a second to take a breath in to compose herself. ‘This time’ she said under her breath but Friday caught it.

‘’You are wondering how the hell I am alive. Well… For starters, I didn’t know that I was dead in this world which… makes you realise that I’m not from this world. I’m actually from what you call an alternative universe. Things got out of hand in my universe after… after you… Oh shit! This is too hard. I knew I couldn’t do this shit! I can’t even talk to my own god damn suit picturing it as my hypothetical dad without messing it up’’ that made a few people chuckle and a few others tos mile. The girl really was his father’s child after all.

‘’Okay I’m hoping you either won’t have to watch this or I can cut that part before giving it to Morgan. Anyways, I’m rambling.’’ Tony saw his younger self in Y/N which put a sad smile to his face. This was something he never got to experience before. To see her this grown up. To see a pieces of him in her.

‘’ So things went down hill after you did the whole ‘I’m Iron Man’ thing –which by the way I’m still mad at you about­- You… You died in my hands, dad.’’ She gulped. She had begun crying a while ago but now that she was talking about her dad’s death, she felt like the lump in her throat got bigger and bigger, suffocating her. ‘’ I was all alone for years! You were all I had and then within a second you were gone! I didn’t have anyone else!’’ She tried to calm herself. She wasn’t recording this to make him feel guilty or get answers she was possibly never going to hear. This was a goodbye. A goodbye she knew he deserved just like how she did from him.

‘’That’s why I made the decision to change it but I accidentally changed universes instead of going back in time. But this was my only chance, only shot at making it right. And then I found out that I had died in this universe and you had moved on. Good for you, dad. I’m really proud of you. You did what I couldn’t. It was a relief to know that you were happy and that you had a family now. I thought for a second that maybe the blip didn’t happen. That in this universe, you had a lovely life and I thought for a second maybe I could be in it too. Stay with you but that hope was shortly lived.’’ She gave a sad smile.

‘’And now I’m about to go to the battle field. Before I go, I have to say, I don’t know how if there is any way for me to stop you. I can’t take it all back but I will do anything to not let another girl grow up without her dad. And I ain’t going to let my own sister down. Oh, did you know that I always wanted a sister?’’ she chuckled making Tony’s heart warm. It has been so long since he heard his daughter chuckle the damn way he does. She stopped for a second to think ‘’Well, she has the Stark charm, that’s for sure. I only knew her for a few hours and she had me the second we met. I wish I could be there for her as her older sister. I would give anything to see her grow up but if that has to be for only one of us to see, I’d rather that be you because I’ve been there. I know how hard it is to lose your dad. I could see clearly what she would have to go through and the moment I realised that I knew what I had to do. I would stop you at all costs and since this reacording is being played I could sleep peacefully knowing she has you.’’ She smiled with tears escaping her eyes once again. Tony was full of emotions. His daughter he has been longing for years was right in front of him but way too far away at the same time.

With a sigh she started ‘’ You have people you can hold on to. I never did. Pepper, Morgan, Rhodey, the spider kid... Hold on to them Tony. Hold on to the team. Oh, speaking of the team, tell them I love them and I missed them so badly. I’m sorry. I thought I was going to have more time to talk And maybe if a miracle happens and we all can manage to stay alive I could tell you all about it but I have to go now. Have an old man to save’’ She saluted and looked around right where the broken team of Avengers were with longing in her eyes. She moved closer to the disk to cut the recording but decided against it the last second. Tony hung his head, his heart broke to hear the hope in her voice when he knew what already happened. He thought this was the end of the recording but he looked up when he heard her talking and she had turned to him and looked right at him as if she knew where he was stated. That sent shivers up Tony’s spine.

‘’I know you think I made the wrong decision but I saved you. I refuse to let you down once again. I refuse to see you die in front of me once again. I’m not sorry for what I’m about to do, I knew the consequences when I made this plan months ago. I’m only sorry because although I tried so much to have the future we always talked about with you, I won’t be able to, Tones. But Morgan will be. And I would give up anything for that little girl. And for you.’’ She said as she caressed the necklace Tony gave her when she was a child. She took the chain out of her neck and put it somewhere Tony couldn’t see. And Tony knew this was only a tape but he tried to hold on to his daughter, to stop her from going out there. His breath caught in his throat when his hands went through Y/N’s body. He fell to his knees.

‘’ But hey if it turns out that I, this badass manage to get both of us home in one peace one we can laugh our asses off as we watch me being the drama queen that I am… Well, no one said Starks weren’t a bit dramatic.’’ The heart Tony thought had broken to a million pieces broke further as he heard the tremble in her voice as she tried to put her brave face on. But she couldn’t hide it when one last tear escaped from her slightly swollen eyes as she ended the recording.

Why do I never have good endings? Cause I write in the middle of the night when I feel sad most of the time and it's easier to write sad than it is to write happy.

I hope you liked it. I would love to hear your thoughts on this one. I'd also like to discuss if you'd like the alternative ending that could be a happy one :)

[korrawrites]

Aedion and Evangeline: Father's Day

requested by anon

words: 1372

fandom: Throne of Glass, post KOA

characters: Aedion Ashryver, Evangeline Ashryver, Lysandra Ashryver

ships: slight Lysaedion

genre: family, comfort

summary: Aedion spends first father's day without Gavriel, feeling sad over the loss of his father, however, Evangeline cheers him up.

Aedion Ashryver was sitting on the bank of a meadow in Caraverre, overlooking the vast scenery ahead of him. Mountains rising behind Orynth, as though protecting it from the cloudless sky, and so many trees and flowers, varying in every color and shade he could think of. He was staring into the distance, mind long lost in the sadness of his thoughts.

A father's day, the first one since Gavriel died. As a child, he never paid any attention to the holiday, a day like any other, no father to celebrate it with. Back before the fall of Orynth, he would spend the occasion with Aelin and Rhoe, his dear uncle taking pity on him and treating him like a son, Aelin was already his sister anyway. He would do everything with them, going horse-riding or visiting the huge libraries. Although nice, it never felt quite right.

After that, however, with spending years on war fronts and Adarlan, Aedion forgot about it altogether, he didn't even have the time nor opportunity to celebrate his birthday, let one a father's day with a father he did not have.

He narrowed his eyes, trying to see Orynth in the vicinity. As Rowan had said, the tales and songs of Gavriel spread, Aedion could almost hear it in the faraway singing of the birds.

The Lion fell before the western gate of Orynth, defending the city and his son.

A single tear slid down his cheek, one he wasn't conscious of until it fell down onto his hand.

He didn't want to feel like this. It wasn't fair, he hated Gavriel for the longest time, and yet he hoped and hoped the lion would come to save him that faithful day of the battle. And he did, nonetheless. He sacrificed himself in the favor of saving everyone else, Aedion hated him a little bit for that as well.

Was he cursed? To lose his father quite literally right after he accepted him as one?

More tears fell, he didn't care to wipe them away until he heard a high-pitched child's voice calling to him; "Aedion?"

He quickly ran his hands over his face, gaze facing at the horizon for a few seconds, composing himself, before turning his head back. "Yes, Evangeline?"

The little girl was dressed in a simple yet beautiful blue dress decorated with flowers, no doubt of Lysandra's choosing. Before Aedion could repeat his question she sat down on the grass beside him, taking one of his much bigger hands in hers. "I'm sorry," she said quietly. Was it possible that she knew what was on his mind? Had Lysandra told her, Lysandra whom Aedion didn't say much to today, but she read him like an open book?

She appeared so innocent, this child that has witnessed and endured so much despite her young age. Aedion thanked all the gods looking over them that she and Lysandra survived the war. Yes, he was tremendously sad for the loss of his father, but losing his daughter... He didn't think he could take it. He supposed it was yet another one of the things he shared with Gavriel.

"Thank you, sweetheart," he mumbled gently patting her shoulder. He didn't realize how long it took him to say that, and that the words were accompanied by tears. Tears Evangeline obviously saw, for she wrapped her arms around him, hugging him as tightly as a little girl like her could.

Aedion loosed a heavy breath of relief, the great ache in his chest suddenly becoming more bearable due to the hug.

He imagined himself as a child, would Gavriel hold him close like he did Evangeline now? Would he feel safe and protected? Evangeline once told him, during those long days of battle, that she felt the safest with him. The words brought such a sense of duty to him, wishing nothing more than to protect the child before him with his last breath. Is that how Gavriel felt dying to save Aedion and everyone else? He could only guess. He could only hope.

"I've made this for you," Evangeline said after what seemed like a long while, pulling away slightly but still leaning on him. He just now realized that she was holding a paper, he wondered how he could have been so distracted not to have seen it before.

He carefully took the drawing extended to him, tears pricking onto his eyes yet again, this time however, the ones he didn't try to hide. Evangeline had drawn, albeit clearly still a child's work, rather nicely, a few figures standing together.

In the middle of the paper was obviously him, with his shoulder-length golden hair, and turquoise-and-gold eyes that had obviously taken her a while to draw. One of his hands was holding Lysandra's, dressed in her usual green gown and arms full of jewelry. She tried to do one of the complicated haircuts her adoptive mother favored, but in the end settled for a simple let-down hair with one tail behind.

Holding Aedion's other hand was a taller male, with hair much like Aedion's, golden eyes, and a collection of lines adorning his hands and neck like tattoos, ones Evangeline couldn't remember but they bore at least some resemblance. Perhaps she even asked someone; Lysandra, Rowan, Aelin, even Lorcan, about the specifics of the lion's appearance.

Finally, sitting on Aedion's shoulders, with reddish-blond hair and a big smile was Evangeline. One of her hands was on his head, the other waving into the distance, as though greeting the real-life Aedion.

At the top of the paper in blank space, it wrote; "happy father's day".

"D-do you like it?" Evangeline asked shyly.

Aedion took himself a few more moments observing the drawing, noting all the small details. The necklace he had given Lysandra for her birthday a couple of months ago, the pride in Gavriel's eyes, Sword of Orynth hanging at his hip, the similarities between himself and his father...

"I love it, Evangeline." He kissed the top of her head, causing her to giggle. "Such luck I have to have such a talented daughter." He meant it, he had never imagined himself as a father, didn't even think he would live past the age of 25, and yet here he was now, failing to find the words to describe his immense love for the child in front of him.

They hugged again, he didn't want to let go, as though fearing he would lose her. "Happy father's day, Aedion, I love you."

"Love you too," he said automatically, brushing her golden locks with his fingers.

They were still for a few seconds before Evangeline pulled away slightly. "Fleetfoot!" She exclaimed as the dog ran towards them, Lysandra behind her.

"Guess who came to visit?" Lady of Caraverre asked with a smile.

Evangeline quickly kissed Aedion's cheek before she started running away from a dog chasing her in a play. Fleetfoot caught up to her and tackled her to the ground, licking her face all over, causing Evangeline to laugh loudly and cuddle the dog's ears.

"We are so lucky to have her," Lysandra said sitting down next to Aedion where their daughter previously was.

"We really are." Aedion wrapped an arm around her back. "Did you see this?" He asked showing her the drawing.

"Yes! She showed it to me, wanted to be sure you would like it."

"I wouldn't like it more if it were a portrait painted by the best artists of Terrasen," he said proudly admiring the art. "We need to frame it."

Lysandra smiled gently. "Of course, my love. Are you alright?" A tentative question, she had seen the way he was distant this morning and just wandered off later. She didn't blame him, she could never. She did, however, want to know how he was. It pained her seeing him like this.

Aedion looked at Lysandra beside him, then Evangeline playing with Fleetfoot. His girls, his home. "Better than ever."

[alexiethymia]

JSHK Questions and Answers

Since I love lists, and I want to organize these for future reference, this is my compilation of the questions I still have as of the most recent chapter, and attempts to answer them with theories and headcanons with no bases whatsoever. So, let us begin!

1.) How does a human become a supernatural? 

Among the Seven Mysteries, only Hanako and Akane-kun were or are humans. Shijima isn’t the original Shijima Mei, and the current Mitsuba was created from the original Mitsuba. Is there a difference between a human becoming a simple supernatural or becoming a School Mystery? Are humans who died and become ghosts, like original Mitsuba, considered Supernaturals? Is Sakura one such human-turned-ghost-turned supernatural? 

For Amane and Mitsuba, we know how they became spirits. They had lingering regrets, which is confirmed by Kou when he said he’d help Mitsuba with his unfinished business so that he could pass on. So what Kou was talking about in the most recent chapter is probably not that. 

Going back to Akane-kun and Hanako. How did Akane-kun become a supernatural? It was through a deal to save Aoi’s life, albeit he was tricked into it. 

Did something of that sort happen to Amane and Tsukasa perhaps? Did Amane make a wish, was tricked, and somehow as a consequence end up killing Tsukasa as some sort of exchange? Because for some reason, among a time lord, a spider that has a library full of knowledge, and the GOD OF DEATH, it’s Hanako-kun who’s the leader of the School Mysteries. Something big must have been exchanged for that. 

Perhaps Tsukasa heard a rumor that one way he and Amane could stay together forever was to become Supernaturals, with one being the other’s yorishiro and for this reason he wanted to kill Amane, except it happened the other way around. Admittedly, this is a bit farfetched. 

2. Who does Teru actually like?

This was established from the very first chapter, so i believe it’s an important plot point.

Sakura: My first guess, again despite having no basis at all, is Sakura. But Sakura already has Natsuhiko so hmmm....

Mei: Yes, this is a bit weird. The only thing I have to go on is that one picture of Teru with Mei and Shijima in Monster Nursery. Teru could have been a kid who had a crush on high school student Mei before she died. 

Aoi: Recent chapters would point to that. It seems so obvious as to be a red herring, but what if that is what makes it surprising enough to be true? I always thought Teru ‘liking’ Aoi was a way to troll Akane just as how Teru lords over Nene’s crush on him to Hanako (man in other circumstances, Akane-kun and Hanako-kun would get along soooo well), but he never said he liked Nene in a joking way, like he did with Aoi. 

If the Teru-Aoi-Akane triangle is suppose to parallel the Kou-Nene-Hanako triangle, then it checks out if both Teru and Akane have a crush on Aoi. I do see them as being kindred spirits. Both are set up on a pedestal despite no one actually knowing their true selves. Everyone thinks they’re so perfect and nice, but both have pretty twisted characters. I mean Akane is also a ‘nice guy’ but everyone knows about his yandere tendencies, and he’s pretty free about what he thinks. On top of that, there’s also the shady business going on in the Minamoto and Akane families. 

Akane: BUT THEN, what if Akane is the Nene in their triangle. Admittedly, a lot of Teru’s actions could be interpreted as him teasing the boy he likes who’s already in love with someone else. IT CHECKS OUT.

Akane and Aoi: Or you know he could have a crush on the both of them. This is just headcanon after all. 

3.What on earth is Natsuhiko’s deal?

I swear he’s like the wolf in sheep’s clothing. Always beware the fool. I have this weird headcanon that he belongs to a family that’s also spiritually inclined like the Minamotos and the Akanes. Who knows, what if both Sakura and Tsukasa are dead supernaturals and Natsuhiko is their link to the living world?

Someone pointed out how the room with the mirror and the toys could be Hanako’s boundary. Besides the fact that we didn’t see any water, I would say that that is one brilliant observation! I could easily believe that. With what we know now about Sumire and from what Tsukasa said about not seeing Hanako for ten to twenty years, Hanako probably left Tsukasa, his yorishiro, in his boundary and never went to see him. The implications are horrifying. As we saw with Sumire, she kept relieving her death. That’s bad enough with No. 6 letting her die. But based on what we know, unless something else gets revealed, Amane was the one to kill Tsukasa. And he left Tsukasa in the boundary for ten to twenty years to relieve that? If true, I really will have to reevaluate my whole opinion about Hanako. 

I think based on what we saw, if that really is their boundary, it may be a replica of the twin’s room, what with all those toys, and by the time we arrive at that point when we’ll see Hanako’s boundary, I think that’s where the key Nene picked up from Amane in the past will play a part. Is that the key to their house? The twin’s bedroom? Perhaps a secret tree house? There must have been a repercussion as well with Nene picking up that key from the past, because if it’s with her now, then it wasn’t with Amane in the past, and that may have changed something.

If that’s true, then it was Sakura and Natsuhiko who broke Tsukasa out. Again it gives credence to the Sakura-is-already-dead theory, because Tsukasa grants the wishes of the dead, so perhaps there was a wish that Sakura had to have granted no matter what, enough to bind herself to Tsukasa, like how Nene did with Hanako.

(A bit of a sideline, LISTEN I STILL HAVE HOPE FOR A HAPPY ENDING OK. Kamisama Hajimemashita also had time travel shenanigans. and it looked like the protagonist would die, but all of those time travel shenanigans were necessary for them to earn their happy ending. Time isn’t a straight line after all. It’s more like a loop or a circle. What will happen has already happened.) 

4. Why are Tsukasa and Sumire the only human yorishiros?

Although Tsukasa as a yorishiro is not yet confirmed, I still have to wonder why. All of the supernaturals had or have strong ties to a living human. No. 1 has Akane-kun, Yako had Misaki, Mitsuba has Kou, Shijima had Mei, and Tsuchigomori had Amane. We don’t know what No. 1 and Mitsuba’s yorishiro are, but for the other three, the yorishiros they have are in relation to their precious humans. 

I can’t imagine that Yako loved Misaki less than No. 6 or Hanako (presumably) loved Sumire, or Tsukasa, and yet Misaki isn’t Yako’s yorishiro nor is Mei, Shijima’s yorishiro, and I have to wonder why.

Is it because Misaki and Mei had already passed on peacefully, while in contrast Tsukasa and Sumire wanted to stay by Hanako and No. 6′s side, which translated to them being bound as yorishiro? 

It’s stated in the story that yorishiro are the things most precious to a Mystery, but it also makes me think that yorishiros are the things or people that the Mysteries have the most regret about. 

5. Why is Akane-kun affected by supernatural events?

Akane-kun has stronger ties to Supernaturals, being a Supernatural himself, unlike Nene who’s just an assistant to one. 

So why did he forget about Aoi when Yako kidnapped her the first time around, yet Kou and Nene were unaffected, and why did the confession tree have an effect on him?

Maybe, because except for the deal with No. 1, for all intents and purposes he’s just a normal human being? 

But this time around, he doesn’t forget about Aoi. Maybe because he was too involved this time so his memories couldn’t be so easily erased.

But admittedly, it may just have been a story telling choice so the readers wouldn’t know Akane had anything to do with supernaturals.

6. Why was Nene chosen as the kannagi?

This was a question I had all throughout the arc, and it still wasn’t answered. Normally you’d think that Nene became the kannagi the moment she made a wish to Hanako but Hanako later says that he had nothing to do with her short fate. So if Nene had never met Hanako in the first place, would she have been doomed to die for completely mundane reasons?

BUT THEN when she read her book at the Bookstacks, if I’m not remembering incorrectly, her first disastrous date was in college, but Mirai says in the Clock Keepers arc that she had less than a year to live, which means she’s supposed to die in high school. Why this discrepancy? Could Hanako have been lying? Did her lifespan shorten after making a wish to Hanako thereafter becoming the kannagi i.e. Hanako’s assistant? But again only those who were already near to death could have made a wish to Hanako so maybe since they were already doomed to die anyway, making a wish to Hanako and becoming his assistant was just the prerequisite to being the kannagi. Except in this case, Hanako wanted to change her fate. Perhaps opening a person’s book changes their fate. Nene’s book was read, Amane’s book was read by Tsuchigomori, but again no in-story event would support this. 

Sumire identifies Nene as the kannagi, but No. 6 passes her by and identified Aoi as the kannagi, so again why this discrepancy? Perhaps someone in the past put a stop to the practice of sacrificing Akane girls (the Minamoto family perhaps?), but an Akane girl would always go to Kamome as a sort of back-up just in case.

Hanako was clearly lying when he said no human sacrifices happened during his time. What if there was a Hanako-san before our Hanako-kun? What if either Amane or Tsukasa made a wish to that Hanako-san, and as a result one of them became the kannagi or human sacrifice?  

7. Why is No. 1 so important? 

Kako is just sus af. Out of all the supernaturals, No. 1 always seemed the most powerful to me, which makes me wonder why Hanako is the leader of the Seven Mysteries. I mean when he called a meeting, only Tsuchigomori and Yako came, but when Kako presided over the meeting, all the supernaturals were there, except No.6. It was like Kako was the judge while Hanako was the defendant. 

Time is an amazing power, even if it’s only in the school. Theoretically, if only within the school, doesn’t Kako have the power to reverse time going back to when Amane’s time when he was still a student there? Or does Kako have the power to transport people to the past while in the school?

Similarly, is stopping time for fifteen minutes the extent of Akane-kun’s powers as the Clock Keeper of the present, or is there something more to it? Why is it necessary for a living human to be the Clock Keeper of the present anyway? Akane-kun once said he was forced to clean the clock where they kept Mirai imprisoned so Akane must know the location of No. 1′s boundary and yorishiro.

Teru said it was important for them to get to the Clock Keepers. Would something happen if all of the Clock Keepers combined their powers (like some super sentai)?

And let us not forget, Shijima’s hint about Nene’s lifespan lies with No. 1, specifically with Akane. (Speaking of Shijima, what on earth was the price Tsukasa exacted for her wish?)

Who knows? Perhaps the key to solving Nene’s lifespan problem without sacrificing Aoi lies with No.1 and No. 6 as the mysteries who have dominion over time, life and death. 

Seven questions for seven mysteries. 

[remythologise]

okay but like i used to be a fan years ago and I distinctly remember Kripke saying how Castiel had such fandom power because in a way the audience identified with him? and think about how fucked up that is in hindsight, a fandom with a lot of lgbtqa members seeing their favorite character become canonically gay and he's killed and like you said the people he loves dont even care like I have to laugh or I'll never stop crying lol

Fucked up how Castiel was only useful to them until they got to the end of the show. It’s like they were forced to bring him back in s7 because of the ratings drop and as soon as they could get away with it they kicked him to the kerb. Like, SPN said ‘actually queer fans fuck you, we only ever wanted you for your money not for what you took out of the show.’ If I’m right about the ending, and I am 99% sure I am right sadly, Robert Singer et al. were only ever tolerating the queer fans and influence on their story because of profits. That’s literally it. As soon as he could, Singer wanted to end HIS story the way HE wanted it - two brothers, no found family. I would like to point out the two things that lead me to believe that; that he always wanted Sam and Dean to die together ‘Thelma and Louise style’ holding hands (lol), and that when Charlie died he was like, I don’t see the problem with killing off a gay character. Also he’s previously said in an interview its ‘his’ story, not the fans. 

(Also as a side note; I do not think this was a CW Exec problem, I think it was a writers/showrunners one. I believe CW would have passed the story esp. if it was ambiguous; what we are looking at rn is Cas being left in the fucking Empty. I’ve also been told (albeit only semi-reliably) that CW would have passed it if it crossed their desks. They did pass the confession. Misha also thanked a bunch of people for Destiel and notably did not include Singer in that list.) 

Bobo and Misha did their best for the queer fans to vindicate them in a story that wanted to can Castiel before the end. I love them for that. Singer and the ones in charge of the ending clearly did not give a fuck about Cas, or the fans that loved him. Hope 20 proves me wrong but I don’t think it will. But yeah, the fact Castiel is just a tragic queer man who loved and loved and did everything for love and wasn’t loved in return (in romantic reciprocation; in being told he’s not just a tool; by what we see at the end of 19 where he’s just forgotten). Rough. LGBT people don’t deserve happiness or happy endings.

Also side note; just talking about this on a server with some others and FUCKED UP how all the supernatural characters (minority metaphors?) sacrificed themselves this season while Dean was like. Yeah Jack, our son, can you sacrifice yourself for ‘me and Sam’s’ freedom. Not even the world. So we have; Rowena kills herself to save them from the shitty ghost apocalypse (at least she’s queen of hell), Jack sacrifices himself to save them from God (at least he’s... powerful atoms...?) and Cas sacrifices himself to save them from Death (at least he’s canonically suffering forever which they will ret con into just asleep, watch this space). All so that Sam and Dean can be happy, because in the end they don’t need non-humans or minorities, or even found family. They only care about themselves. They just accept Jack and Cas are gone forever. Anyway anyone who likes 19 is just a foreign species to me unless they are Sam/Dean shippers because at least I understand WHY they think that! The episode was incompetent on every conceivable level, it was a farce. But no, I don’t believe a deliberate one.

[jiminthestreets-bonesinthesheets]

Final Fantasy: At Lucis End - CH 1

Fandom: Final Fantasy XV, Final Fantasy 

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Noctis Lucis Caelum/Original Female Character(s) 

AO3

Masterlist

Summary:

    A treaty. A light at the end of the tunnel that King Regis had been staring down for years. A proposal. A wedding that stands to save the lands. A betrayal. That could tear it all down. And a love. So strong yet so torn.

    The war between Lucis and Niflheim could come to an end, but much will have to be sacrificed along the way. And in the end, would it even be enough? Would the loss of life, love, and family be enough to save the people of Lucis? Or will it all come crumbling down in the end?

*** MY WORK IS NOT TO BE POSTED ON ANY OTHER SITE WITHOUT MY EXPRESS WRITTEN PERMISSION. THOUGH REBLOGS AND COMMENTS ARE SUPER LOVED AND APPRECIATED! THANKS FAM!***

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Chapter one

     "And in the heat of battle, Lucis’s fiercest warrior, lands flat on her ass all so she could look cool while taking down a Bandersnatch,“ Libertus leaned back in his chair as he recalled the memory from years ago, snorting a laugh before he continued, "here she was thinking she was hot stuff, goes running in, trips over her own feet, goes catapulting across the battlefield, and ends up skidding back first through a huge pile of who knows what. I was laughing so hard I couldn’t even fight.”

     "Why is this your favourite story to tell?“ A female voice asked from beside him, "I’m pretty sure everyone here has heard it a thousand times already, and gods know I don’t want to relive it every time you get drunk.”

     He laughed again and slapped a hand on the table, “Because it was the exact moment that you finally learned your lesson and realized that what Nyx was always telling you was true. Battles are not won through sheer strength or brute force, but-”

     "But the will with which a warriors heart bleeds for their lands and people, and their willingness to die for their loyalties. Yes, I know.“

     "At least you’ve learned something,” he snorted another laugh and slapped a hand on her shoulder, shifting her armour, “but you were young then. Nyx had just taken you in not long before that, and you thought you were the strength with which Lucis would win the war. So, despite Nyx telling you to hold back and think out your strategy, you go running in, all swollen ego and cocky grin, and in the end you landed in crap. Literally, you smelled like shit for six days after that.”

     She laughed into her drink, despite the embarrassment it was a good story, even she would admit that, “Whatever, I still killed it.”

     The entire table of Glaives erupted in laughter at the pair’s usual banter, “Glad to see you managed to carry over at least some of that ego. But now look at you,” he gestured to her, “you truly are the kingdom’s greatest warrior. Strong, smart, the best fighter I’ve seen in years, and now you stand side by side with the king and his son. You’ve made the Glaive proud. Araceli Ulric, pride of the Kingsglaive.

     "And this has officially gotten too sappy for me,” she downed the last of her drink in one go and stood from the table, “I have to go find Nyx anyways, we have some strategy to work out before another attack. So be ready for a briefing tomorrow.”

     They all groaned in mock annoyance as she turned and made her way to the exit of the bar with a wave behind her.

     "Libertus!“ The name was heard faintly over the chaos inside the bar. He looked around but saw no one, then it was heard again, closer this time, "Libertus!”

     He turned to see a familiar face running towards him, bouncing between the people and scattered tables before he came to a stop where he was sitting. He leaned on the table close to Libertus, “My friend, I come bearing news.”

     "Domenic,“ he turned towards the man beside him, a member of the king’s advisors who he had known for years, "what’s so urgent?”

     "This news,“ he began with a shake of his head leaning in even closer, "if the king knew I had given you this information, it could be my end.”

     "You know I would never betray you. What’s wrong?“

     He took a quick look around then leaned back into Libertus, "We must find Nyx. It involves Noctis.”

     "Is he alright?!“

     "Yes, but…” he moved back and waved for Libertus to follow him, “we must find Nyx. This information must be passed on to him and then Araceli, and it cannot come from anyone else. She must be informed, but it must be Nyx who does so, for if she hears it form anyone else gods save their soul. And If she hears it straight from Noctis it could be bad, she must be prepared. We both know she will need her time to think before addressing the issue head on.”

     "Let’s go then,“ he stood, albeit slightly wobbled, and hurried out the door with Domenic, "explain to me on the way, I know where he’ll be.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

     "Have you seen Nyx?“

     "Sorry, Lady Ulrich, I haven’t seen him today.”

     "No worries,“ she said as she continued through the halls of the citadel, "I’ll find him eventually.”

     She continued to wander, searching every room of the citadel and finding the usual staff and Glaive members who always filled the halls, but could not for the life of her find the one person she had been looking for for the better part of her afternoon.

     She turned down yet another hallway when her name was called from behind and she turned with a smile, immediately recognizing the voice, “Nyx! I’ve been looking for you all day! Where were you?”

     She turned and walked back to where he had stopped walking. “I have to tell you something.”

     "And we have work to do,“ she ran the last few steps towards him and gave his chest a light jab, dipping and diving while she laid a few more light blows, play fighting with him as they always did, though this time he wasn’t playing back, "we have to rethink strategy before we are attacked again, and have it all prepared for a briefing tomorrow with the rest of the Glaive. So tell me in the strategy room.”

     "No, Araceli,“ he tried to grab her hands and keep her still but she kept dodging him, "let me tell you now. You’re not going to like this, and it needs to come from me.”

     "Why?“ She dodged his hands again and pretended to punch his jaw.

     "It’s delicate,” he finally manages to capture her hands and hold them still in front of him as he continued, “it involves you.”

     "Me?“ She looked around Nyx to where Libertus and Domenic were standing at the end of the hall, watching on with unmoving expressions, then back to Nyx, "What’s going on?”

     "When I tell you this, I understand you’ll need time, anyone in your position should-“

     "Nyx, tell me what’s wrong.”

     He took a breath and squeezed her hands still in his, “Lucis and Niflheim came to an agreement today, a peace treaty was signed.” she eyed him and nodded, “The treaty called for peace between the two lands on the terms that Noctis marry the Niflheim Princess Lunafreya. He’s leaving in three days to start the journey there, and Regis wants you as part of his envoy.”

     Nyx let her hands go when he felt her pulling them away, watched as she backed away from him with furrowed brows and her lip between her teeth.

     "I know you’ll need some time, but-“

     "When did this happen?”

     "This morning.“

     "Does Noctis know?”

     Nyx sighed, he knew where this was going, “Yes,” she scoffed and looked away, “but it’s not his fault, everyone wanted it to come from me.”

     "Why?!“ She turned on him, anger in her eyes, "Why did it have to come from you?! Why couldn’t he tell me himself?!”

     "This is why,“ he tried to reach out and take her shoulders but she jolted away, "you can’t be angry with him, this isn’t his choice.”

     "He still could have told me,“ she shook her head as she backed away, "we are best friends, basically grew up together, we’ve been through so much, trained side by side. I…”

     Nyx sighed and spoke softly to her, almost afraid to scare her off, “I know this is a lot to take in especially considering how the two of you…” he could see the tears in her eyes welling, ready to spill over, but also knew that there was no way he could comfort her right now. Nothing would make this better, nothing could change it. “You have three days. Take them and sort your emotions, figure out what you want to do, and then talk to him when you’re ready.”

     "This is…" She couldn’t even finish, her voice choking her as she just turned and started walking down the hall, eventually turning into a run, then Nyx watched as she warped herself away.

~~~~~~~~~~~

     She ended up on the far side of the castle before she stopped breathless in the courtyard out back. She had been running and warping for what felt like hours. She was exhausted physically and emotionally, and still felt like she had made no progress in sorting out any of her thoughts.

     She wiped her forehead on the back of her sleeve, huffed to catch her breath, and kept her back to the large double doors to the citadel when she heard them open behind her.

     "Araceli.“ She closed her eyes as she recognized the voice. "Ara?”

     She turned slowly towards the voice, the last person she wanted to see. “Prince Noctis”

     "You know that’s not necessary between us, formalities.“

     "Isn’t it?” She stares at him a moment before she says, “Perhaps it should start to become common practice then, since you are now to be wed then crowned king, I should no longer be so familiar.”

     He looked her over, saw the redness in her eyes and cheeks, the anguish clearly written on her face, and nodded, "You know.”

     "Yeah, I know,“ she nearly whispered, "wish it would have come from you though, wish we could have talked about this before I had to hear it from Nyx.”

     "I didn’t have a choice.“

     "I know,” she ran a shaking hand through her hair and slapped it against her side, “this was your father’s choice, I understand that, but…”

     "I’m sorry,“ he choked, nearly in years himself, "but maybe we-”

     She backed away stopping him in his steps towards her, “Noct, no. These are your father’s orders, your king’s orders, there’s nothing we can do to change that.”

     "But Ara-“

     She stopped him with a hand up before he could make the hole on her chest any deeper. "I shall take my leave now, my Prince,” then she turned on her heel to leave and he stopped her with a hand on her arm and she shook it off much to his surprise.

     “Please, don’t go.” she could hear the desperation in his voice but closed her eyes to try and block it out.

     “But I can’t stay, even after you’re married.”

     “What do you mean?”

     She took a heavy breath, looking up to him with pure anguish in her eyes, “I can’t stay. After you’ve been taken and wed, I’ll have to move on. This… us, whatever this is, it can’t continue after your wedding. And should I stay here it would only prove to be far too difficult to resist being close to each other, as close as we’ve always been, and that wouldn’t be fair to either of us or your new wife. So I’m leaving Insomnia.”

     “You don’t have to leave,” he shook his head, a desperate look in his eyes, “I want you to stay.”

     “Why?” she raised her hands and let them fall to her sides heavily, “Once you’re married, what else have I got left?”

     He didn’t say anything more, didn’t really know what to say, or if he could say anything around the hole that had just been punched into his gut. So instead he watched speechless as she bow curtly, something she only ever did out of pure teasing, and left.

~~~~~~~~~~~

     “Well that went just about as well as I thought it would.”

     Libertus was back at the bar he had been at the day before. It was now coming up on dawn and he was sitting across from a very unusually quiet Nyx who still had not touched his drink. Libertus was already halfway through his second.

     Nyx ran both of his hands through his hair, and without looking up from the table muttered, “This is going to break her.”

     “Yeah, it is,” Libertus nodded, looking into the last dregs of his drink before downing it, and waving at a waiter for another, “do you think she’ll talk to him? Tell him?”

     He shook his head, “Her stubborn ass, no.”

     “She has to!” Libertus waved a hand then slammed his fist on the table, nearly knocking over his new drink as the waiter placed it beside him, “This is literally her last chance! Their last chance!”

     “I’m not sure it would make a difference, Libertus,” he crossed his arms across the table and finally looked up, “even if she did, Regis’s words are final, the treaty’s already been signed. I don’t think there would be a way around it, at least not a way that wouldn’t result in the continuation of the war. Regis is trying to end it, she won’t get in the way of it, and Noctis will do whatever he needs to, to help.”

     “And what good is that if our sweet girl and the little prince are both miserable in doing so?”

     “It’s not really a question of being miserable, Lib, it’s a matter of lives. Many of which have already been lost fighting this damn war.”

     He sighed and looked back down at the table as Libertus spoke again. “Do you think it will even matter?” He didn’t look up, but he knew exactly what Libertus was talking about. “I know Regis is tired, and we’ve lost so much already, but do you really think that this peace treaty will end this war?”

     Nyx just shook his head, “It won’t.”

     “Iedolas wants control, we both know this,” he nudged Nyx’s arm, gaining his attention, “and there’s something off about this treaty if you ask me. I mean, after all these years of fighting, why now come to Lucis and suddenly offer a peace treaty? Iedolas was fighting for dominance over the territories, this doesn’t gain him anything.”

     “It doesn’t make sense,” Nyx agreed, “nothing makes sense. Having Noctis marry Lunafreya doesn’t give Iedolas any power, it actually shifts the power completely to Noctis. It gives him rule of Lucis and Niflheim when he’s crowned.”

     “I don’t know,” he shook his head, “there has to be some sort of alternative motive to this but I just don’t know what yet.”

     “Well, the prince leaves in three days,” Nyx said, finally taking a sip of his drink, “I think we should try to figure out as much information as we can before Noctis reaches Niflheim, and keep the Glaive close to Regis. Maybe we can figure out what’s behind this treaty and stop Iedolas before he can do whatever it is he’s planning.”

     “Yeah, and stop this ridiculous marriage while we’re at it.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

     Noctis walked slowly to the edge of the roof of the citadel. He had known that the second she warped away from him in the halls, this is where she would be, but he had decided to give her some time to herself. And as dawn was just starting to hit the horizon, he came to sit beside her, looking out over the swirls of pinks before them.

     “I don’t want you to go.”

     “I have no other choice,” she whispered.

     Noctis risked a quick glance at her face, cheeks littered with freshly stained tear tracks, “There is always a choice, you’re just taking the harder road out of pure stubborness.” She just shook her head. “I thought we were friends.”

     “Are we?” She looked to him then, and he just stared back slightly worried, “Or is there more lingering between us?”

     “I…” he turned and looked down over the city, away from her gaze.

     “Yeah, that’s what I thought,” she turned and looked back over at the rising sun, “but there can’t be more between us now. Not when you have a wife. And I won’t sit back and be left to stand at a distance only to yearn for what she has that I know I can’t, nor can I be a constant distraction to you. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us, Noct.”

     “So you’ll just leave?”

     “What do I gain if I stay?” She pulled her knees up to her chest to wrap her arms tightly around them. “A life of disappointment? A broken heart? I can’t go through that. It’s already hard enough that I’ll have to be a part of the envoy that will deliver you to your waiting bride, and then have to sit through a wedding that I wish with all my being was not taking place. But I will do my duty and make sure you get there safely, and then once you are wed and back inside the walls of Lucis, I will leave. You’ll never see me again after that, it’s for the best, for both of us.”

     “I don’t want that.”

     “You can’t have it any other way.”

     “So let’s leave.” She turned to look at him, his expression completely serious. “Both of us. I don’t want to marry Lunafreya, but I’m being forced to because of this treaty, because my father and king is telling me I have to. But now that we both know the truth, who cares.”

     “Noct…”

     “I only want you.” He placed his hand over hers and she sighed.

     “You don’t mean that.”

     “Of course I do,” he shifted closer to her, “I’ve meant it for years.”

     She shook her head, “That’s not what I meant, Noct. You and I… we wasted so much time where we could have been together, but now we can’t do that. Regis is trying to make peace for the people, and you have to marry Lunafreya to do that. And no matter what, Noct, no matter how we feel about each other, you can’t run away from Lucis. These people need you, and I know that in your heart you could never leave them behind.”

     “But-”

     “Noctis,” she stopped him, “years ago I ran away from something I should have never left behind. I disappointed a lot of people and I will never be forgiven for what I did, this is my punishment. For all the lives I failed I will never be allowed to live the one I want.”

     “I don’t believe that.”

     “You don’t know what I did,” she sighed, “and if you knew, I don’t believe we would be so close.”

     A moment of silence passed between them before he looked back up to her and asked, “Why didn’t you say something before? About how you felt.”

     “So many reasons.”

     “Tell me them.”

     “I can’t,” she shook her head.

     “Why not?”

     “I told you, Noct,” she turned to look at him with a sad smile, “you would look at me differently, and I won’t have that.”

     “I could never,” he answered confidently.

     “You say that now, but you would.”

     “I wouldn’t care,” he shook his head, “no matter what your past holds, I want you to be in my future, always. I will always love you, I always have.”

     She wanted to say it back, but she knew she couldn’t, not when Noctis had a duty to his kingdom before anything else, and she couldn’t get in the way of that. She took a deep, stabbing breath, then said instead, “But you can’t, you must love the Princess Lunafreya now.”

     “My father, if he knew about us he-”

     “Would not change his mind,” She bit her lip, trying to hold back the next onslaught of tears she could feel coming, “as the king demands so shall it be done.” Another moment of silence passed between them, then she asked. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

     “I was afraid,” he nearly whispered, “I was afraid you wouldn’t feel the same and then you’d leave me, but it turns out that’s what I got in the end anyways.”

     She sighed, looking out over the kingdom below them, the sun now past the horizon and whispered, “I’m sorry, Noct.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

                                                     NEXT

A/N: Sooo yeah, thats chapter one, so let me know what yall think XD And I promised i would tag @wisteriayamashi my new friend!! *waves* And I’ll also tag @prettyprompto @tea-time-with-devil-traps @idiotflowerex  If y’all know anyone else that would be interested please tag them! And if anyone wants to be tagged for furture posted just let me know XD

<3<3<3</p>

[plus-size-reader]

Crippled pt 3

Ivar the Boneless x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 1231 words

Warnings: none

Summary: Ivar finds a way to make the best of reader’s little deal 

Read Part 1 here 

Read Part 2 here 

———————————————————————————————————

You didn't expect Ivar to take you up on your offer. You didn't actually think it was possible for him to get out of the secure cell. There were twenty guards posted along the hallways leading to your room but somehow, he done it.

"When should we be married?”

You opened your eyes slowly, recognizing his voice. You knew exactly who it was but there was no way he was there. You assumed you were dreaming, but entertain his vision anyhow. "I would not marry a savage like you" you muttered, your voice drowsy and full of sleep.

Ivar hummed, even barely conscious you knew well enough to sass him. It was hilarious, and filled him with the same amount of pride he got on the battlefield. You were the only woman in the world who had ever made him feel this way and as entertaining as it was, it made him uneasy.

“You said that you and I would be wed if I managed to escape your little room...and I did” he shrugged as if it was simple. Clearly he had no understanding of how hard it was meant to be getting out of your cells. Your father had heard many stories about how dangerous the youngest son of Ragnar could be, and had taken special precaution to keep him in.

It was clear to you though, that Ivar was going to do whatever he had to in order for you to become his wife. “It’s obvious you escaped Ivar, how else would you be here if you didn’t?” you ask, wiping the sleep from your eyes slowly. He was a fool, but for some reason, you didn’t mind.

There was something endearing, albeit obnoxious about Ivar’s ability to get out of any situation no matter what. He had this dedication none of the men in your kingdom had ever shown you.

Thousands of men had come to your father and eldest brother begging for your hand in marriage but each time you’d refused. All you saw when you looked at them were scrawny, foolish men that had no chance of dealing with or loving a woman like you. None of them could even hope to speak to you, they weren’t man more than children, quarreling over your hand and title.

“So you will come with me, and become my bride?” he questioned, though there was something in his voice that told you he wasn’t exactly asking. You were afraid for a moment, there was something so frightening about agreeing to something so outlandish. You couldn’t actually marry the viking could you? He was a prisoner of your state, what would it mean if you were to marry him?

You frowned, running your hands through your hair which was still loose down your back. It took you a moment to gather your thoughts, your eyes flicking over Ivar’s face, his bright eyes burning into you intensely in the darkness. “How would I become your wife? Would you have me cut my hair? Pierce my flesh with ink? What would a savage wedding entail?” you cooed, only half kidding.

Ivar had never understood your hesitance, did you truly not wish to be his wife? If only you knew any of his idiotic brothers, he wouldn’t have seemed like too bad an option.

“You and I would be married in front of the gods and all my family, then we’ll sacrifice a goat and there will be race between my brothers” he explained, talking through each event carefully. He had never thought about how strange his people’s customs must have seemed to someone on the outside. He could only imagine what sorts of horrors your christian God could cook up.

The only part of his statement that didn’t shock you was the goat sacrificing. That was actually what you’d assumed his people did for special events but the rest seemed fairly normal. “And you wouldn’t touch me, until the night of our wedding?” you clarify, you were terrified that the wedding would involve some sort of public bedding ceremony. That sort of thing would be ungodly and there was no way you could justify that in your own mind, to your God.

Ivar chuckled, reaching out to take your hand in his own, squeezing them reassuringly. His action was meant to be comforting but it just made your tense. He was absolutely horrible at the this.

“I will not lay a hand on you until you ask me to” he assured, that was the first genuine thing you’d heard from him in the whole time he’d been in your kingdom’s custody and for the first time, you felt good about your bargain. “Okay Ivar, I will marry you” your voice was confident and strong, reminding Ivar of why he’d fallen for you in the first place.

You were so resilient, he was sure that only you would be able to raise his children. He’d been a hellion on his mother, so his son’s would undoubtedly be worse. It didn’t hurt that by wedding you, he would have tamed the wild Wessex princess.

Still, he couldn’t hide his shock, he didn’t think his proposal would actually work. “Excellent, we leave for Kattegat in the morning” he announced, leaning forward to place a light yet heated kiss to your waiting lips before crawling back to his room.

You weren’t sure how he did it, or if it really happened at all, but when the sun did finally rise, you were engaged to Ivar the Boneless. It wasn’t easy to explain to your father, who couldn’t believe you were purposefully going to some savage land with a brutish killer but he knew well enough that he couldn’t stop you.

The boat ride was horrible, considered you’d never been anywhere near the water before, led alone in a wooden ocean-casket. “Ivar!” You gasped, taking his hand with such an intensity that even he was surprised. Your grasp was tight with your nails digging into the flesh of his hand. “Gods woman” he groaned, yanking his hand back to look over the red trail you’d left behind, just slightly bleeding.

His eyes sparkled at the crimson dotting his hand, slightly startled but mainly in awe. He slowly brought his hand to his lips and licked the blood away, his eyes wide as he watched you. There was so much fear in your eyes but you still looked so beautiful. It was incredible to witness, your plush frame was hidden away from his eyes by thick fur but even so, he wasn’t regretting his offer.

Love wasn’t something Ivar was all that good at but even so, he knew what he felt for you. He wanted nothing more than to make you his faithful wife, teaching you about his culture and watching your body swell with his children. You felt bad for hurting him, but you felt faint, your heart was hammering so hard against your ribs that you feared for your health.

The water was black and raging against the side of the ship, rocking it violently. With Ivar being a cripple, you didn’t understand why he would ever risk going near the water but if he wasn’t bothered than you shouldn’t have been either. All you could hope for now was that being married to Ivar wasn’t going to be as hazardous as this ship was.

[mst3kproject]

315: Teenage Caveman

This is yet another movie that goes under multiple titles, and like several previous examples, the new title is actually an improvement. Roger Corman wanted to call his movie Land of Prehistoric Women, which would certainly have gotten butts in the seats, but they'd have been very disappointed butts by the time the end credits rolled. Teenage Caveman is a much better description of the movie we've actually got.

A primitive tribe – albeit a very clean one whose women are curiously lacking in body hair – lives in Bronson Canyon, hunting taxidermied deer and men in bear suits.  The 'teenage' son of the cave painter wonders why the tribe lives by such strict rules – particularly, why the taboo against crossing the river into the jungle?  Eventually he decides to go see for himself, and finds a world full of monsters: crocodiles with fins glued to their backs, stolen from other movies!  Adorable dogs who want to lick you to death!  Men in dinosaur costumes even less convincing than that one who used to be a Vine star!  The She-Creature in a cameo appearance!  And oh my god... is that... it can't be... but it is... it's the parrot-bear from Night of the Blood Beast!!!

I was kind of surprised to look up actor Robert Vaughn and learn that he was only twenty-six when this movie was made.  I guess everybody just looked ten years older in the fifties.  He's also got really small ears.  I never noticed that before but now I can't stop seeing it.

Before I try to talk about anything in this movie, I'm going to have to deal somehow with the fact that the characters have no names.  Our hero is referred to only as 'the Symbol-Maker's Son', and other characters have signifiers like 'the Fair-Haired Boy' and 'the Blonde Maiden'.  This seems very strange to us, but there are peoples in the world who do not use personal names – the best-known example is the Machiguenga of South America, who address each other by relationships and occupations, just as the characters in Teenage Caveman do.  The lack of names in the movie seems to serve two purposes: it suggests a very small, isolated group, where everybody knows everybody else and there is unlikely to be more than one 'Symbol-Maker' or 'Fair-Haired Boy'; and it tells us that this group values collective over individual identity and survival.

As far as it goes, this an interesting artistic choice and a nice piece of worldbuilding.  The problem for me as reviewer is that it's very awkward to type out 'the Symbol-Maker's Son' or 'the Black-Bearded Man' over and over.  I will therefore adopt Joel and the Bots' informal designation of the main character as 'Travis' and his rival as 'Allen'.  

The movie has a couple of points to make, although being as it's Roger Corman, it makes them with a sledgehamer.  The first is about tradition and asking questions, and this is indeed so heavy-handed that Joel and the Bots actually talk about the movie in these terms during a host sketch.  Travis is constantly questioning the inherited wisdom of his tribe, despite punishments from his elders.  In the end, his curiosity drives him to investigate for himself, which leads him to the film's second point: that if humans are not careful with our technology, we are doomed.

The 50's Caveman Movie is a genre mostly associated with women in fur miniskirts being menaced by plasticine dinosaurs (exactly the sort of movie one might expect from the working title Land of Prehistoric Women), so having a message at all is honestly kind of impressive.  Teenage Caveman's messages are unsubtle, but they are also surprisingly well-explored.  The film tells us that pushing boundaries is the key to progress, but it does not present this as a smooth road.  When Travis and his friends venture into the wilderness, one of them drowns in quicksand, and Travis himself is injured and cannot immediately return with the others.  He comes back having invented the bow and arrow, a new weapon with a longer range than the spears the tribe normally uses, but also having actually seen the God that Gives Death with its Touch, the monster he believed to be mythical.  Much has been learned, but much has also been lost.

At the end, the laws the clan have lived by for as long as anyone can remember (hundreds of years?  Thousands?) are declared null and void, and they must forge a new way of life in new territory.  This is good, in that new possibilities and better food sources are now open to them, but it is also terrifying, in that they don't even know how to begin.  The God that Gives Death has been vanquished, but other perils, such as the wild animals and the quicksand, are still out there to menace them.  The benefits of exploration outweigh the dangers, but Corman does not romanticize it. More of the tribe are going to die on their journey of discovery.

Opposed to Travis and his urge to explore are the various voices of conservatism within the tribe.  The clan's received wisdom, the Word, represents safety but also stagnation, and the desire to stick to it has two different faces.  One is Travis' father, who warns him away from exploration and is quite stern with him at times, but it clearly comes from his love and concern for his son.  He tried leaving the safe area himself and suffered for it, and he doesn't want Travis to repeat his mistakes.  Yet when the clan wants to punish Travis, his father urges them to be lenient in the hope that the boy has learned his lesson.  When asked to choose between his tribe and his son, he chooses Travis.

The other voice of tradition is the Black-Bearded Man, Allen.  At first he encourages Travis to explore and to question what he's been told, but then turns around and demands the boy's death when he actually does so.  His real motive, as we learn, was to disgrace both Travis and his father and step into their family's important position within the tribe.  He wishes to preserve the existing power structure in order to advance within it – Joel remarks that people like this have been with us since the beginning of time, and they will doubtless be around until the end of it. DOes anyoNe Among my Lovely reaDers wanT to pRovide Us with an exaMPle?

At the end of the movie, the God who Gives Death with its Touch is killed, and turns out to be an old man wearing some kind of college football mascot costume that is probably supposed to be a radiation suit.  We get a voiceover from this man, most likely representing what's supposed to be written in the book he is carrying, telling how the world ended in nuclear war and the land of hairless cavepeople and mutant dinosaurs we've been seeing is actually the aftermath of that apocalypse (so it's basically Yor! The Hunter from the Future without Rip Steakface).  He fears that this is destined to be cyclical – that man will simply rise only to fall again and again and again, until we are finally extinct.

Interestingly, and quite realistically, this message goes entirely over the characters' heads.  They have no idea what the book represents, only that there are pictures of human beings and symbols that clearly have some kind of meaning.  They hope to find other people who may know how to read them, but there is nothing to indicate that they will ever succeed.  The one foreigner we see in the entire movie appears to be just as primitive and illiterate as the main characters, and the old man's voiceover suggests that in a life of perhaps thousands of years in length, he has never seen anyone more advanced.

Throughout the movie, we have seen people persist in spite of warnings, but for the most part this was presented as a good thing: if at first you don't succeed, try, try again.  Travis' persistence in the face of his elders' disapproval and his own failures allows him to forge a new way of life for his clan.  But like everything else in the world of Teenage Caveman, tenacity has two faces. The people of the past persisted in making war and brought themselves to a bad end.  The ultimate point of the film is that 'progress', whether scientific or social, is never straightforwardly good or evil.

The reason the movie is about a teenage caveman is because rebellion and pushing of boundaries are what teenagers are best-known for doing.  Another level of the film's story asks parents to stop and think about why their children are asking questions and trying out different ways of behaving, but this, too, has two sides: children are also invited to think about why their parents discourage them from doing so.

That's really a hell of a lot of theme for a fifties caveman movie, and audiences must have been rather confused to get this when they were probably expecting dinosaur fights and screaming women.  Looking back on my review, I realize I've probably made the movie sound much better than it is.  Don't get me wrong, Teenage Caveman is still very, very bad.  The costumes are terrible, the dialogue is stilted, the actors are bored, the animals are fake, and the tribe seems to consist of twenty men, four women, and no children.  But if nothing else, I can appreciate the film for its ambition, and the story as presented manages to have a satisfying conclusion without sacrificing the ambiguity that is so important to its point.

Teenage Caveman was remade in 2002, by people who apparently found the fate of the nigh-immortal scientist far more interesting than bland cave kid angst.  They may have had a point, but they were also utter hacks.  Their movie is an aggressively bad metaphor about STDs, where the original is just a blandly bad mull about progress.  Personally, I prefer Disney's recent version, which ditched the post-apocalypse thing, made the God who Gives Death far scarier and more tragic, and featured a fab glam-rock number by a giant crustacean.

Help me.

[tomoyanosekai]

Distance ~壁を壊せ~ (Kabe wo Kowase: Break the Wall)

“Leave me alone… I wanna continue to be alone, and no one needs to worry about me... I’ll help everyone in front of me, but... I just want to be alone…”

It was this thought that kept pestering me as I walked around Biola at midnight in the middle of October. As I sat down in one of Biola’s gardens under the cold starlit sky, I found myself laying down on my back, staring at the sky, and closing my eyes to only see one certain image. The image I kept seeing was an image of myself hugging my knees, sitting alone in a crouched position within a decrepit room with no doors, with brick walls continually being built. I wanted to be alone, and felt that emotional isolation was the best thing for me. So far, 2018 has been an answer to my prayer at the beginning of the year, as I grow as a person and in my walk with Christ. It certainly hasn’t been easy, and October is no exception. As October comes to a near close soon, I could easily say that this month has challenged me emotionally.

Even as this month has gone smoothly in terms of school, (aside from stressful moments that have been resolved peacefully.) I thought I was becoming more of a man and had begun living more proudly. However, unbeknownst to me, there were things I didn’t notice that concerned a lot of people around me, and it wasn’t pointed out until much later as of recently. Even though I thought I was acting normally, my friends have been concerned for me for a while. According to them, I’ve been distant, cold, and constantly alienating myself. They weren’t wrong, as at some point in this month, I began to act coldly and much more aloof to even the closest of friends around me, not wanting to really show my emotions. However, there was something still haunting me, and that was ultimately the idea of “not being good enough,” as my father instilled into me. I felt that wasn’t good enough for everyone, and that I don’t want to inconvenience them with my problems and feelings. I wasn’t worth troubling everyone from productive things they could be doing, and I’d simply be getting in the way if I complained to them about my life and problems. Add this on with events from my past, I only feel that my voice is something that isn’t worth troubling others for.

I guess, to give a little background about my past… I’ve been through a lot of things. The details on what happened back then will stay unknown, but I won’t stray away from the reality of the situation, and I will say that I ultimately had two very real choices. Between the two choices, I could either try to speak up, say something and die for it, but also know that my death would leave the whole world around me in a state of brokeness beyond repair. If I died, I would’ve been put out of the misery I had to keep facing. If I did end up living somehow, I still would have had to witness the world crumbling in front of me and see everyone’s tears, including my own. However, I didn’t want any of that, and I chose instead to shoulder everything despite it being terrible, so that way I didn’t need to see the world around me become broken. I clung to a strong desire to live and chose to survive, even as things were horrible. My strong desire to live and continue smiling and living outweighed the choice to have my life abruptly come to an end. It’s because I’ve faced darkness that I’m able to see true light.

In that same sense, I don’t want people to experience the same sadness I’ve gone through. I don’t want them to be in that same dark place I was in, and see their world crumbling right before their eyes. Because of my past experiences, I felt that no one needed to know how I was doing, just as long as they can smile again. What I say and do only matters if the people that I love and care about in front of me can smile again. If I need to sacrifice myself, I’ll gladly sacrifice myself. I always used to think, “I’m strong enough,” even when I was at the point of breaking. Whether it was seeing all my friends getting into relationships and being the only one to keep them in line, or whether it was through everything I’ve been through, or the stressful points of life, albeit job searching, family matters, or school, I kept thinking “I was strong enough,” and “I’ll shoulder everything.” However, that thought has changed. I’ve come to accept that I’m simply “not strong enough” and “I can’t do this alone.” No one knew what I was feeling because I never wanted to see a day where my emotions and feelings would rise up, inconvenience others, and hurt them.

Even with all these walls and barriers set up, it took me a while to figure out that these walls needed to be broken somehow. Although I felt safe within these walls, I was lonely, and I felt that my sacrifice of emotional lonliness would be for the best, as I would be staying out of everyone’s ways. No matter how bad a situation was, I would always try to mask things with a smile, and I kept smiling because I felt that no one needed to know how I was doing. However, I was wrong, and it’s still hard for me to accept and believe the things I saw in front of me and hear from people around me. Recently, there was an event with Hope Rising where I chose to sacrifice my spot for the sake of making things easier for everyone else and our attendees. I figured, that “this was my responsibility as a club officer, and that the other club officers and members should come before me first and foremost.” Although I ended up sacrificing myself, this ended up ultimately concerned and bothered everyone else even more. Even though I felt this was a necessary sacrifice, it was pointed out to me that I was just alienating myself from everyone, and maintaining an emotional distance from everyone. Even more recently, one of my friends began to talk sense into me, and pointed out everything I had been doing up until now, was concerning everyone around me. This resulted in myself tearing up a little bit while trying to force up a smile. As I began tearing up and trying to smile, my friend struck a nerve when they told me this: 

“You don’t need to keep forcing up a smile. It’s okay not to smile.”

In that same conversation with that friend, at some point ultimately began sobbing for me. I kept asking myself these questions in my mind:

“Why was this person sobbing on my behalf? They don’t need to... Why do these people want to be so deeply invested into me? Why do they keep caring, even though I’ve been a pain in the ass?”

Honestly, the answer was simple:

“It’s because the people I’ve met, my friends: they LOVE me; just as I love them. Why couldn’t I understand and accept that? To them, I AM worth it.”

To go with this, in an unrelated situation, someone else recently did give me some words of encouragement, but at the time, I still had trouble accepting those words.

“You are someone who wants to do things right just because it’s right. You’re someone who’s kind to others because they deserve kindness. You love on other people in a way that is unique and meets everyone where they’re at, no matter who they are or how others see them. Even if things seem hard, you still find a way to have fun and enjoy it, despite any situation being as it is. You’re someone who puts everyone before yourself, and you love them in a unique way that is Christ-like and Christ-minded.”

It was at that moment, I was reminded of the orange vision, and reminded of two names. With an orange, one needs to peel away the bitter skin before getting to the refreshing, juicy flavor that is the actual orange. I have picked up traits of two of my favorite characters Son Goku from “DragonBall” and Kouta Kazuraba aka Kamen Rider Gaim, from “Kamen Rider Gaim.” Ironically, they are both characters who primarily wear orange and blue. Just like Goku, I’m always finding a way to have fun when things are getting hard. Likewise, I’m also like Kamen Rider Gaim/Kouta in a sense where I try to do the right thing even if it’s hard, just because it’s right, and give kindness to others because others deserve kindness.

No matter what kind of darkness may be in front of me, whether it be from myself or others, there are things I can clearly see in front of me that I don’t agree with, and I know won’t fall and become that way. I don’t need to live my life under someone else’s expected standards. If it weren’t for God and the people he’s placed in my life, my life could have ended up very differently. Despite that, it’s also because of these people that I’m constantly reminded and forced to face these bigger questions about myself that allows me to grow. As Paul writes in Galatians 6:2,

“Help carry each other’s burdens. In this way you will follow Christ’s teachings.”

The Body of Christ truly is an amazing thing, and I can’t deny that at all. Beyond the bitter skin of an orange, there’s a refreshing fruit waiting there. There might be a lot of darkness in my heart and mind that I need to face, but the true person engulfed in God’s light is just beyond that darkness. Through this, it seems I’ve had trouble peeling the fruit on my own, and was stubborn to see that. Likewise, it took a lot of people to destroy those walls I built in defense out of stubbornness. I wanted to be alone, and just continue to live my life sacrificially. However, a lot of my friends did their best to break those walls, and through that broken wall, I saw lot of their hands extended out to me beyond the rubble. In order for me to try and taste that refreshing flavor and see who I truly am as a person, I needed to accept the help that was given to me. This may feel like a rehash of last month’s post, but honestly, this is a true starting line for me to go beyond and overcome my own inner darkness, and I’m happy I’m not doing it alone.

“From here on out, it’s our stage!!”