#he wouldnt know whether he’d find it funny or not

[yugen001]

smol, tiny even

[turtleblogatlast]

okay so just so you know, im literally in love with your prison!leo au, yesterday i spent like over an hour scrolling through the tag and i think i read every post at least twice (more for the comics). its combining ‘prison dimension has permanent effect on leo, and not just mentally’, ‘immortality angst’, ‘object or place having a form of sentience’, AND ‘leo is somehow made significantly younger than his brothers which very much changes their dynamic without him wanting it to’ all into one which is just amazing.

i love how you combined comedy and tragedy very well!! like, for example the idea of leo being mistaken for the youngest brother, than a son, then a GRANDSON, is kinda funny for a second, but when you think about it for more than a couple seconds its also. really tragic. this poor kid may never be able to fully grow up - not only is he likely going to outlive his whole family but hes also permanently in the body of a child, lacking a fully developed brain and maybe never having the full maturity of an adult (at least in path b, until hes able to find a ‘cure’, if ever). its just. so good!!

anyways aldjsldkksld enough of the gushing (i mean i could keep doing it for like two thousand more words, but if i did it would probably devolve into keysmashes at some point from the Grip this au has on my brain). i am curious, what would happen if leo got sick? i know you mentioned that things like a common cold wouldnt really affect him that much, but what about one of those sickness is that leaves you pretty delirious/feverish and can take you out in a matter of a week? (could be a type of mystic sickness or curse as well, where you don’t know if the victim will survive or not and the only option is to wait it out.) what would happen? would they sort of just decide that its better to find a way to temporarily kill him so his body could regenerate as new, or would they try to take care of him and see if they could wait it out, since i imagine it would be the only time he’d really let his family take care of him in that way. thats all assuming his body wouldnt just automatically find a way to heal the separate curse and he’d be well again within an hour (still not fully sure as to how his healing works, sorry!)

anyways, love this au and im going to be obsessed with it for the next Month thanks

[ cw: discussion of murder / discussion of mercy kill / risky behavior implied / ]

Omg I’m

So touched???

Thank you for enjoying my AU so much, it really makes me happy to hear this :’) This whole AU was thought up exactly because of my interest in the concepts you mentioned - particularly the one regarding the Prison Dimension having a permanent and visible effect on Leo.

I know I haven’t updated it in a while, but I am still working on it and have even finished drafting the next comic, I can’t say when I’ll finish it but this ask definitely pushed me to work on it more so thank you so much <3

As for your question- it depends! In most regular illnesses, Leo would get over them very quickly, only experiencing the briefest brush with the symptoms before his body throws it away, if that. If the illness is mystic in nature then things get a little more complicated, as you’re right in that it could potentially end up as an endless loop of the first part of whatever weird sickness he gets. So if the illness is something that instantly affects you in the worst ways, and it’s something you just need to ride out until it leaves…that can potentially be harmful. Of course, it needs to be a powerful illness to bypass the prison’s curse to that extent though. …then again, maybe something would prefer that for him, should it appear beneficial :)

As for whether the fam would decide to just…’reset’ Leo to get rid of the illness…that’s a tough one. It really depends on how long Leo’s been back, and even then, it’s not something they’d just do, it’s hard for them to even imagine really. More likely, a sickly Leo would merely try to find a cure himself in his delirium, and end up ‘reset’ along the way.

I hope my wishy washy answer was enough! And really, thank you so much again for the kind words, they mean a lot :’)

[macdenlover]

the parasocial relationship ive fallen into with these 3 middle aged men combined with my autism super powers of pattern recognition has given me profound (and maybe delusional, who knows) insight into their minds and realistically here’s where i think they all land on macdennis.

i think charlie is the most on board with it but in a casual wouldnt-that-be-pretty-funny way and i think his biggest gripe with it would be them eventually running out of ways to make it fit the comedy of the show once the initial chaos of it dies down. rob is probably the most into taking on the sheer newness of exploring a relationship dynamic like that but he’s also very analytical and his gripe would be whether or not it would stray too far from the premise of the show and he’d possibly be worried about it turning into a “gay show” because of the ratio. and now for my most controversial take yet i think glenn is the least on board with macdennis especially when it comes to making dennis canonically queer. i get the vibes that he would think making dennis bisexual or whatever would send the wrong message because having a character as despicable and as “sexually deviant” as dennis be ACTUALLY gay would come across as them vilifying queer people. which rob would then push back against saying there’s bad people out there who just Happen to be gay there’s nothing wrong with putting that on television. (i’m starting to suspect glenn not being there is the reason they were able to push the envelope so much with them in s13-14.) I think they’ve had serious in depth conversations about their relationship and their plan has been to just keep postponing it until they figure out if they want to proceed with it later or just let it fizzle out into nothing. it’s definitely not at the forefront of their minds when they make the show but it’s back there somewhere for sure. the biggest hurdle i think they’re getting to especially this far into the show is deciding how heavily they want to lean into the commentary/satire aspect and how much they want to lean into the characters and their personal motivations— because a lot of the time the two blend together really well but with something like macdennis, as funny as it may be, it would require them to either lose the satire, have the relationship be unintentionally read as satire in a way that comes across as homophobic, or they’d have to find some way to incorporate satire into that storyline in way that’s successful AND true to their sense of humor AND would deflect from them being gay (like making fun of traditional couple tropes? idk). i think at some point they’re gonna hit “fuck it” and finally pull the trigger but that’s gonna be when the show has nothing left to lose. as for s16 im predicting there’s gonna be some significant macden moments but i don’t think it’s actually going canon yet.

again these are just my thoughts if you think im totally off i’d love to know

[probably-haven]

after binge reading i have come to a new revelation: I’m not a fan of most Xiaoven fanfics

Don’t get me wrong, I love the ship and its one of my favorite to think about.... but most of the fanfiction for the ship just- doesn’t sit right with me for a number of reasons. 

Disclaimer: these are personal opinions from my own taste and are in no way an attack against any authors out there, because frankly fanfic authors are great and not like i could do better lol. As these are personal opinions, I acknowledge here and now that a number of people disagree and that they are under no obligation to change their opinions in any way as it is not and never will be my intention to tell others what they should be thinking That said- read at your own risk if you want- meh, anyway-

time to share some opinions that have been on my mind lately

The biggest reason.... is how they handle Xiao. And I don’t even mean mischaracterization because Xiao is such a complex and yet simultaneously simple character that as long as you’re somewhere in the range of “Xiao vibes” it’s really hard to write him out of character because of his complexities. What I mean is something that i actually completely agree with as being accurate to his character. In nearly every single fanfic I’ve seen, there is some element of idolization that Xiao has for Venti, or for the sake of reference, Barbatos. He tends to think himself beneath Barbatos and/or indebted to him, whether that be because he’s an archon, because he saved him, or simply because of Xiao’s tendency to dehumanize(yes i see the irony in that word usage) himself.  This by itself isn’t an issue but its often how this trait of his is treated.

Imma just list a few ways I’ve seen this be handled within Xiaoven fics. - It isn’t handled, it’s just there and accepted as a part of who he is in the story - It isn’t handled but his trait is treated as source of humor within the story - Venti(and others) roll with it (finding humor in it, just cant change it, encouraging it, making jokes about it, etc.) - Venti takes advantage of it(whether accidentally or purposely) - it’s actually addressed(by Venti or someone else or the narration- can go a number of ways, but just- even a brief reference to the fact that its not a good mindset fits in here) - savior!Venti(Where venti disagrees with it but the way it’s written gives off “god among mortals” vibes- like he’s just being humble and truly is above him in reality) - its the focus of the story  - not directly addressed but shown to be destructive.  - they chose not to not include this in the story’s characterization of Xiao(just saying that this is valid ahead of time) Theres others but i have a lot already.  Note that I tend to read more ‘serious-toned’(idk if that makes sense) fics so that may skew my perception

Now there’s a few that i have issues with on their own- both instances of it not being handled, Venti(and others) rolling with it, Venti takes advantage of it(purposely(and without good intent)), and savior!Venti. Xiao not only has this trait, but he is unfamiliar with what is normal in relationships or emotions as a result of isolation and inexperience. He is also either not aware of or not concerned with what is considered strictly “healthy.” Combining these makes for a rather dangerous combination and just accepting it as “oh he’s just like that, it’s who he is” or making it out to be something funny- It’s not wrong or bad by any means necessarily, and I could still possibly enjoy it to an extent depending on a series of different factors, but its- not as often.  Even in the case where I do enjoy reading it however, I would still feel uncomfortable sharing it with or recommending it to others because in the first instance it feels like normalizing a destructive and dangerous mindset, and in the second case it does the same while simultaneously making a joke of it. It’s the same deal with Venti or other characters rolling with it, but that’s probably gonna be mentioned later too. Not to say that this is a “wrong” way to handle it, that it makes the fic bad, or that authors even are normalizing anything by doing so, just that in my specific instance- not a fan. 

I’ll get to the others when i talk more about Venti, but for now: It’s the focus of the story. I think I saw like... 2? where the story was like- focused on this and why its a problem which- power to them, address those real world problems like a boss- but also i wouldn’t actively seek it out or anything- like, good job, but doing so just leaves it open neutrally for other factors to decide how good a story i think it is. 

not directly addressed but shown to be destructive. You’d think i wouldn’t like this- but frankly in fanfiction not everyone wants to address every character flaw verbally because it can through off story, narration, dialogue, and general flow to do so. This can be with an event, an action, a dialogue, a mere comment, making it actually fit into the it’s actually addressed category except that its- subtle enough to make its own category. plus i live for show not tell- in everything- its a thing. im- very much a fan of when the fics do this but the subtlety is easy to miss and its not common so- 

It’s actually adressed- doesnt have to be a lot- just mention anywhere or imply anywhere that maybe idolizing someone as a god and savior and being in a relationship with them while having little knowledge of standards, emotions, relationships, or healthy behaviors in general- maybe isnt the smartest idea in the word. (”Call me Venti, not Barbatos” by itself is not enough to fit in this category tho as a note)

-

Now lets talk about Venti...

uh.... those who have followed me for awhile will probably already know this but... I have a lot of opinions on Venti and a pretty- “niche(?)” perception of his characterization that isn’t shared by a lot of others- so I don’t actually read as much Venti fanfic in general as you might expect because I often end up disagreeing with how writers portray him, which again, in no way is their characterization wrong, but- “their perceived truth” conflicts with “my perceived truth” and by extent so does the characterization, though neither is any more correct than the other from an objective point of view, if that makes sense... but anyways now that that’s said, moving on before this becomes a philosophy lecture, as fun as that would be for me.  I’ll try to keep my “perceived truth” out of this for the first bit. 

Venti’s response to this: 

He rolls with it: this depends on the mood of the fanfiction. If they dont put a lot of stress on that trait of Xiao’s it totally fine but if the trait seems to be a major part of Xiao’s character, it seems like normalization once more. (more on this later)

he takes advantage of it purposely: if its an AU or something and Venti’s like a villain(i saw a few) then- villain venti isnt my cup of tea but i have no qualms. If they don’t portray Venti in a negative light while having him take advantage however that’s a bit uncomfortable to read for me because it feels like normalizing taking advantage of that mindset as well as the mindset itself. However, i did see a number of instances of Venti using it as leverage for like- self care- which i definitely have no qualms. Xiao: [insert probably destructive idolizing statement about being indebt] Venti: How bout you pay me back by actually sleeping for once smh or other variations are okay and depending on the vibe are actually a really fun dynamic as long as it doesnt turn into romanticizing or normalizing it, y’know?

Venti accidentally taking advantage of it.... I love angst- and in most of these theres a sense of guilt when he realizes- and i just think thats a lovely way of addressing the dangers of such a mindset for both sides. As long as it doesn’t keep repeating to the point of romanticization its totally cool to read in my eyes(not irl ofc). If Venti never realizes he accidentally took or is taking advantage it feels a bit like normalization, and if he does but just- doesn’t care thats- a rip.

savior!Venti...... i- i hate. the story giving off vibes that Xiao’s mindset is technically correct while Venti oh so humbly tells him to treat him as an equal like the wonderful and charitable person he is.... i just- no. of course thats over dramatizing it- I think the main thing that gives it this vibe is when Venti doesn’t seem either concerned, surprised, uncomfortable, or otherwise have a negative feeling towards Xiao’s mindset. Just- it makes the whole thing weird in my eyes when Venti doesnt really seem to have his own reason to oppose the mindset idk- 

-

fact time!

Venti is the god of freedom. His backstory is freeing Mondstadt from a god’s tyrannical reign. His origin is a windsprite, just another breeze bringing changes for the better. His form is a nameless boy who played an instrument and then died, thus failing at his only dream and only ever accomplishing anything because of the help of others. He slept for a thousand years after the archon war to avoid putting Mond under the rule of yet another tyrannical god. He only even became a god because Andrius chose to let him. He wouldn’t have even had that chance if the nameless bard had survived, he’d remain just another wind while his friend ascended to godhood. Venti sacrifices his own power for his people’s freedom. 

now that I’ve laid out a number of canon facts, time for opinions:

Venti has little to no desire to be seen as a god. He thrives in, comes from, and emphasizes a lack of superiority in quite nearly everything. The first Ragnvindir, who canonically turned his back on Venti after Decarabian’s fall, likely did so because one- he anticipated power would corrupt and Venti would soon become just another tyrannical god, two- he suspected Venti used the nameless bard in an attempt to rise to godhood, or three- idk insert other possibilities to acknowledge again that i could totally be wrong.

Look me in the eyes and tell me Venti wouldnt trade godhood for his friend in an instant. His godhood was only granted to him because his friend died and could easily serve to constantly remind him of what could have been and what he lost. Venti takes no enjoyment from being seen as superior and in my opinion, I feel that it could actually make him largely uncomfortable when his divinity and abilities as an archon get involved-

also self promotion for my favorite posts- check out #archon war era venti if thats interesting to you

so anyway Venti rolling with it or making jokes about it just doesn’t sit right with me.- 

-

Okay! enough talking about that mindset!

idk- i have... a few/lot of other gripes and stuff or just things that kinda throw off the vibe for me but that’s the main one plus my general personal pickiness when it come to Venti fanfics- but this has gotten long enough already- 

idk i just felt like rambling about it and i haven’t done a long post in a while so-

again, I love the ship and its actually one of my favorites- just the fanfic isnt my thing..... that doesn’t mean i don’t still love it and come up with a whole ton of brainrot and ideas on it tho lmao

[chat-noir-always-here]

I rewatch Miraculous—Mr. Pigeon

Behold!!! The episode that almost made me stop watching Miraculous.

No for real i think i got up and left the room first time around, this episode was so ridiculous.

• “You only have one day to work on your fashion piece.” Only a day? That seems kinda unrealistic when you take into account designing, gathering materials, whether or not you need to go out and buy any materials, the amount of time it takes to actually put all that together...

•WHOA Gabriel’s actually smiling in that pic Mrs. Bustier shows. Er, smiling-ish

•Pure cinnamon roll child seems proud this peppermint frappucino dickhead is his father (Gabriel ur hair looks like whipped topping and that tie doesnt help). BE GRATEFUL FOR SUCH A CARIBG CHILD YOU PRICK!!!

•Maaaaaariii chill the fuck out your overactive imagination and severe anxiety are getting the better of you.

•AHEM Gabriel has a purple bowtie in Mari’s imagination instead of that ridiculous peppermint scarf he uses to hide Nooroo’s broach???

•Adrien: appears out of nowhere

Marintette: jerks and flops away like a fish on dry land

Me: lol bye Marinette

• Adriens beuatiful face when Mari is talking to him (before she blunders and stumbles with her words) is beautiful

•Mari’s beautiful face when Adrien is telling her “you’re so talented Marinette!” and the subtle tremor in her eyes as they widen with her smile...☺️😊😘i love my beautiful, anxious mess of a daughter

•Mari: Follows Adrien with her eyes like an owl. LMAO.

•Chloe does not deserve Sabrina 😒

•Whereas Gabriel resembles a peppermint frap, Hawk Moth/Papillion appears to be the result of what might happen if Batman and the riddler had a baby

•Ramier, bruh, there is like. Zero. Fucking. Reason to be that upset over not being allowed to feed pigeons. For real. Go feed them on some rooftop somewhere if you must. No reason to let Hawk Daddy akumatize you over it...

...

...

...You know what? We’re not calling Gabriel “daddy.”

EVER. Again.

•Also Hawk-shitface, pigeon dude is your worst idea and you keep coming back to him. Seriously at least put some effort into your champions’ outfits. Youre a fashion designer for petes sake!

• wow this show really loves its skin-tight body suits, huh? Even when they look ridiculous.

•Sabrina how the hell much did you have to pay for a cellphone that lets you zoom in on a fucking sketch from dozens of feet away and score yourself a crystal-clear image???

•Sabrina: “We’re soooo awesome!”

Chloe: “We?”

Chloe does NOT deserve Sabrina.

•Arent real bird feathers full of germs and bacteria that cause diseases? And Marinette “im immune to bird flu” Dupain-Cheng just plucked that shit up off the ground and put it on her hat of all things. I dont know whether to be fisgusted or impressed.

•Chat “paint me like one of your French girls” Noir for the win everybody

• “Im allergic to feathers.” I came across a theory on tumblr once (cant find the OP) that this coulda been caused by Emilie wearing the damaged Peacock broach when she was pregnant with him. If thats true i would be pleased😏

•Allow me to channel Chloe for this comment: LB, CN, that disguise is about as convincing as Mr. Pigeon and Bubbler’s get ups are appealing. In other words, NO.

•Chat Noir moonwalking with a hat on—booiii got some moves. 👌👌👌👌

• “You’re the cat dont you eat [pigeons] for breakfast?!” No LB, Kitty Boi is a domestic kitty otherwise he’d present to you little dead things like my cat used to do before we stopped letting him go out. This is an awful joke but SPARE THE BIRDS, theyre just like Ramier—being controlled by a monster.

• “On the count of three my beloved pigeons will commence fire.” As disgusting as pigeon poop is i think they’ll live. Cant you come up with a better evil plan? Threatening to break the glass floor at their feet by having the pigeons stomp on the cage would be more effective. I’m not trying to help the villain, kaay? I just prefer my villains to use their head. Honestly Team Rocket is more intimidating than Pigeon Dude.

•is it just me or is kitty boi especially adorable in this episode??? 😻😻😻

• flock of pigeons put a dent ten times the size of kitty boi’s head in the door

Okay thats actually kinda terrifying. What woulda happened if that attack hit a normal person wearing no magical armor??? They’d be pecked to bits...

• CN: “I gotta get outta here before my secret identity is revealed!”

LB: “Yeah you wouldnt wanna let the cat out of the bag!”

CN: “...Haha very funny.” 😾

Dont dish out what you cant take, handsome boy.

•LB’s look of amusement as CN starts running in place for fear of detransforming in front of others is hillarious

•kitty boi if this hotel takes tips you should really give Jean-whatshisname one. That was the speediest, life-saving room service ever.

•isnt this just Chloe’s room??? Theres a ladybug pillow on the bed and everything. Why did the mayor send CN to Chloe’s room???

• “i cant wait my dear pigeon.” Hmm reminds of later on when Hawk Moth calls Nats “My dear Mayura.” Bruh if you INTO Ramier just ask for his phone number like a normal person, quit akumatizing him and eat a damn snickers

•LB: Time for a sneak attack! Oh no, my sneak attack failed cuz my partner couldnt help but sneeze with all these FEATHERS around.

HELLO, he just told you he was allergic to feathers???

•ugh them censoring out the punches with flashy screenshots is so LAAAME show me the VIOLENCE.

• “Cat Noir! Grab [the bird call!]” AGAIN he’s ALLERGIC TO FEATHERS. Just tie that yoyo to something to keep Pigeon dude in the air and smash it yourself.

• Gabriel is that teacher from Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide who was never physically present in class and was only ever seen through a tablet or some nonsense

•Chloe getting busted my Marinette in front of the principal, Gabriel and Adrien is a great example of how PLAGIARISM DOESNT PAY are you listening art thieves lurking on tumblr, instagram and elsewhere???

•ahem Gabriel that sympathetic look you give a weeping Chloe is very out of character

• “youre the winner Marinette.” Not gonna check out Kim and Max’s hat? You could at least look at it, doesnt seem very impartial to pick Mari without looking at ALL the hats

•siiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhh

Girl they are BOTH allergic to feathers. How many blonde teenage boys walk around with a feather allergy? Quantum Masking or no Quantum Masking, c’mon you should be at least considering the idea theyre the same person from that knowledge alone.

Annnd thats all for now. This episode is more of a vent-inducing hate sink than enjoyable, save for the gushing waterfall of cute kitty boi moments it provides. I may do Stormy Weather later today to make up for it.

[flower-of-the-desert]

Thoughts on 2gether ep6

soooo, you’re telling me Tine totally was going to let Sarawat kiss him again, huh?

cool cool cool

Sarawat really picked the wrong time to pass out, poor bastard

aww, I’m really digging the dynamic between Mil and Sarawat’s bro (what the hell is his name again?)

oh ho, baby bro’s got some game

I cant tell if he’s got more game than his big brother or just Mil isnt nearly as oblivious as Tine

probably the second

“Gross but cheap so we gotta eat” - whoever came up with that blog name is a fucking genius

I lost it at Tine’s friend being like of course getting drunk wont make you spill your secrets and 10seconds later he’s spilling EVERYONE ELSE’s secrets

“if you agree to be my tutor, I’ll be a good boy” I see where this is going, I see it

damn, the way Tine reacted when he thought Sarawat was badly injured

DAMN, boy, you in love

The Looks(TM) are back were they ever gone really

the way they smile at each other is just *chef’s kiss*

Sarawat in that black shirt? A Good Choice

ok, so this scene with getting Tine drunk is... *sigh* I knew something like that happened in the novel and I was hoping the show wouldnt do it but I guess they kind of went with it though I dont think they went as far as the novel did? correct me if I’m wrong

obviously, it’s not cool or funny or cute to try to purposefully get someone drunk so that you can do something like this

although I am a bit confused about Sarawat’s thought process here - like watching the scene itself, it semeed to me that Sarawat was genuinely just trying to get Tine home and undress him so he’d be comfortable like he said and then the picture was a spur of the moment thing he decided to do on the spot which while still not cool would have been slightless less bad than planning the entire thing coupled with purposefully getting Tine drunk so he could do it (and also was Sarawat drunk too?)

but then he was clearly trying to get Tine drunk at the bar

so I dont know, but either way that scene left a sour taste in my mouth

I think I will take it as Sarawat making a mistake due to his hurt and anger and desperation not to lose Tine and I hope he’s not gonna do something like that again

moving onto better things aka Tine’s Longlasting War with his Brain Cells

I like how it takes one of Tine’s friends pointing out that Green hasnt been bothering Tine for a while now for him to realise hey, maybe I should stop fake dating Sarawat now

Green needs to get off his high horse though, like the fact that Tine felt like the only way to get rid of him was to fake dating another person isnt Tine being “harsh” or trying to hurt Green, in fact Tine did everything he could to NOT hurt his feelings

I gotta wonder though for whose sake was Green acting in this scene? Sarawat’s?

I do love how Sarawat came to the rescue though - he’s winning back some of the points he lost

and I’m glad Green stopped them from kissing cause Tine has had enough of people doing things without his consent this ep, thank you

Tine’s friends’s methods of dealing with Emotions(TM) consist of 1) hack his facebook account, 2) get him drunk enough to confess all his sins and 3) make him jealous so he’ll claim you

Tine, having absolutely no short term memory of the other night when he did, i fact make Sarawat jealous enough to make him stake his claim: that last one sounds great!

Man going to all the seminars to find his One True Love, that’s what we call determination and loyalty

listen the fact that Tine made this whole elaborate plan to make Sarawat jealous only for it to backfire when Tine realises that HE HIMSELF is jealous of Sarawat’s fans is what the kids call

also the fact that Sarawat was so insistent that Tine stay and listen to him perform because he wanted him to hear the song he couldnt listen to last time because of Pear

you wont make me forgive you this quickly, you caring bastard

ALSO the fact that Tine simply cant help but sing along whenever Sarawat performs is just *chef’s kiss*

I think Tine has shifted from trying to figure out whether Sarawat likes him to trying to figure out if he likes Sarawat back

oh damn, next ep we get jealous!Tine AND jealous!Sarawat, I am not ready

[quokkalatte]

I havent posted on here for awhile but I wanted to talk ab something that's been on my mind recently and I've been dwelling on it a lot lately. And it comes to supporting a friend, when they tell you they have a crush on someone.

When your friend approaches you, whether it be through text, face time, or face to face, and they tell you that they have a crush on someone, you want to be supportive right? You want to tell them "ooo ask them out then!" Or something along those lines. And if they get nervous about it, and are scared that their crush will reject them, do not say "what's the worst that could happen? Theyll reject you?"

Becuase yes. Rejection IS a worst case scenario. It might not seem big. Your crush not liking you back, so you pick yourself up and move on. Or at least that's how some people would view it. But the thing is, if you dont know a person's history when it comes to romantic interest, saying something like that can be damaging.

As I've grown up, and developed crushes on people, and when I would confide in friends, that's normally how the conversation would go. They get giddy and excited, and tell me I should ask them out. And that was okay, but over time, it wasnt. Because every. Single. Time. I would get rejected. My first crush on a boy was in elementary school. And ever since two months ago, every time I told a boy I liked them, they would reject me, often in a cruel manner.

When a freind of mine would say "the worst they can do is reject you" I would get this feeling in my stomach, and I would always think "exactly. That's the exact WORST thing that could happen. Becuase rejection hurts, and it affects others differently.

There are those who can just pick themselves up and move on. No harm no foul. But for people like me, those experiences stick to you and morph you.

Hitting Middle school, the rejection got worse. I had three small crushes in the span of three years. And every single one had found out. When I told them, they looked at me funny, and would leave to their group of freinds. And they would tease me. And laugh at me becuase I was different. I wasnt the skinny pretty little girls like the others in my class. And it was around that time I'd realised that. After the first two, there was a third. This experience is probably where alot of my issues resolved. And it was only 6th grade.

I didnt even tell him that I'd liked him, a classmate found out and told him during recess. We were waiting in line to go back inside for class, and the school I went to we had uniforms. Mine always fir tightly becuase I was bigger than most of the girls in my class. I remember I was wearing my favorite blue jacket and the khaki pants we were required to wear. When the classmate ran over to the boy I'd liked, he'd pointed at me and told him. The boy turned and looked at me, and got the most disgusted look on his face, and shouted "EW!" Before walking away. I proceeded to get upset. The classmate approached me, and in a pitting manner told me he didnt think that my crush would react that way. The girls I were freinds with said horrid things about the boy I'd liked, but the only thing that I could think of was the look of disgust on his face at the simple thought that I'd had a crush on him.

And it stuck with me. It still does. Containing through high school I became more reserved when it came to the guys I liked. I never told my friends who my crushes were, and when they outed me about it, that's all they wanted for me to do was to tell him. Tell him becuase what's the worst that could happen? He could reject me?? Yes. Becuase in my mind, I was ugly. I was undeserved of every having a boyfriend. And I was convinced I would never have one. I would look in the mirror and loath what I saw. I hated how I looked becuase all I could see were what they saw. I wore hoodies all the time even in hot weather so that I could cover my arms. I didnt want any of me showing. I wouldnt wear shorts becuase I hated how big my legs were. I held so much self loathing for myself, I wouldnt look in a mirror for longer than I had to.

That had gone on for years. I've hated myself for years becuase of judgment. Because I feared what people thought of me. It didnt just extend to what I thought the boys thought, but everyone thought. I hated attention being attracted to me, and my social anxiety got worse. Anything that brought attention to me would make my heart pound and my palms sweaty and my head buzzing with a hundred thoughts that made it so difficult to function.

It was only recently in the past couple years I've been able to accept myself. And I'm still very far off. And it might sound dumb or cliche, but the only reason that sparked this, was kpop. My friend introduced me to BTS, and I got invested in them. I loved them. I loved these 7 boys, who radiated such happiness and positivity. Their concept of loving yourself for who you are, and that the closest to you would do the same, those words meant alot to me. They helped me when I was anxious. Their music was, and still is, so soothing to me.

In my Senior year of high school I was taking my health elective, and we were learning about the BMI and to test what ours was. I refuse to share what my results were, but they werent healthy. As the teacher droned on about the topic, I sat in the back of the class quietly crying and trying to get myself to stop but I couldnt, and I felt a panic attack coming on, and I was scared that I would bring attention to myself, so I needed to distract myself from it, and I plugged my earbuds in and pulled up a BTS video. It was just a 2 minute video of Jimin laughing, and that was enough. I calmed down enough to collect myself, and I stopped crying.

Two years later I'm still not perfect. I still have a very toxic mentality of myself, and I can accept that I might need help, more than what KPOP groups can give me. They did give me the tiniest of nudges to help me, and I am very grateful.

I've told you what you shouldnt say to someone when they tell you that they have a crush on someone, so here's what you COULD say.

Your friend is worried, that their crush might reject them. You can offer your support.

"I'm here for you. I hope it works out, and I'm sure it will. And if not, I'll be here to help you"

"I understand you're scared, I see why you are. You dont have to tell them unless you're ready. I'm in your corner if you need me"

Motivate your friend in a good way. Dont pressure them into it, becuase it can make them anxious and stressed because they feel like they HAVE to tell their crush, and it makes it worse on them. Encourage your freind to get to know their crush. Tiny things, speaking to them. And if their scared about that, reassurance will help them. Offering advice and tips on what they could say and do will help them.

This is my last personal story to pair with this. I developed a crush on a guy. We met through a mutual freind, one who happens to be a very good friend of mine. I got his snapchat, and since then we've talked every day since. I didnt realise that I'd had feeling for him until a month into just chatting, and I started to wonder if he felt the same. The select few people i told all told me that it was possible, and they believed that all the signs he gave me were pointing towards yes, he did like me. I was still unsure, so very unsure.

My best friend is who helped me the most. I told him about a week after I found out my crush on this boy, and he was immediately supportive. He never once said to me "worst case scenario he rejects you". He told me o should talk to him more, get to know this boy and see what happened. My feelings became stronger every passing day. This boy made me so happy, and he was unlike any of my past crushes. I was so used to the guys I liked wanted nothing to do with me, or if they actually DID, it wasnt becuase of me, but because they wanted nudes. The few experiences I'd had with guys before this boy were awful. I had been talking to a guy but all he cared about was sex and nothing else and ignored me for a month, and then proceeded to ask for nudes becuase he was horny. It was very damaging for my mental state, and I was in a rough place. Id cried to my best freind, begging for him to tell me what was wrong with me. Why boys didnt reciprocate my feelings, and when they showed even the slightest of interest it was because they were horny. I felt like I would never find anyone ever.

I was scared, after developing feeling on this boy. I told my freind the same stories I've shared here. How I was terrified of being rejected. Becuase I'd gotten to know this boy and felt more for him than what freinds normally would. My best friend was so supportive, he stood by me when I would get anxious and when I would tell him my fears and doubts.

It took me 3 weeks to gett the courage to tell this boy that I liked him. The day I told him my nerves were shot, my palms were slick, but I did it. I confessed to this boy that I liked him. Funny enough, it was through a meme. It said that "I might have a big fat crush on you but I'm scared to say anything" my nerves were on fire my body was numb. It might sound like an exaggeration but this was how I was feeling. I was texting all three of my supportive freinds at once. My best freind was the first to know, he was with me through the entire time I talked to my crush. My crush had asked why I was scared to tell him, and I'd told him that I didn't want to make him uncomfortable becusse we'd grown close in the time we were talking. He reassured me that I couldnt make him uncomfortable. I'd asked how he felt about me. At this point my heart was in my throat. I watched the icon that showed he was typing and I was ready, I was ready for him to reject me, like all the boys had done before.

But he told me he felt the same. He didnt reject me. He was worried becuase we live so far apart from each other, and we werent sure how long distance would do for us, and how Covid19 would take into play. But I'd said I was up to try if he was, and he was too.

That was two months ago as of writing this. But if it wasnt for my best friend being so supportive of me, I dont think I could ever have told my boyfriend that I liked him. Even now, the concept is foreign to me. My trauma is still apparent becuase I cannot fathom how someone as amazing as him likes me back, after years of getting rejected and my mental health being damaged by the countless teasing. The first time he called me beautiful, I broke down and cried, because it felt too good to be true.

I'm sharing this, I'm sharing my experiences becuase i wanted to help people know how they could help a friend who might share similar experiences with me, get through the fear of rejection. Telling someone their worst case scenario doesnt help ease their worries. But offering your support, and reassuring them that it would be okay and that you will be there for them will.

Rejection is a part of life, and its something you cannot really control. But if the right words can help you get over your fear of it, then it does help ease the pain.

I'm not saying that all my past friends who told me rejection was my worst case scenario were trying to be malicious, they just wanted me to be happy and were excited for me. I understand that.

And if you ever were that friend who said that, it doesnt make you a bad friend. You were trying to help in your own way. But this may help for future interactions, or at least I hope it will.

You dont always know the experiences that your freinds go through, but being there and supporting them through their fears will help them, and give then confidence.

My best freind has supported me through so much, and it was him who helped me overcome one of my biggest fears.

I hope you found this extremely long PSA to be helpful and I hope I explained myself the best I could. If something is unclear to you please tell me I want to help everyone I can, because I beleive you all deserve to be happy.

And no of course you dont need a partner to be happy. You can be strong and independent in your own way and find your happiness there.

[thrushpot]

Five and Nine dearie! ;)

since you asked about all my stories, I have around 13-ish so this is basically a giant commentary for everything:)🤘🏼😃

hidden in plain sight

what part was hardest to write?

The fucking letters, jesus christ. I thought, ‘hey, wouldnt it be fun to have Billy’s point of view with him reading what she admires about him and make it super lovey dovey and sweet?’ and I almost gave up so many times cause fuck it was hard. Took over a week with switching the wording around and finding what flowed best. Also finding what didn’t sound creepy.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

Nah, I mean I could’ve had their places switch, where he’s the one that writes to her... but I loved writing him feel all blushy and giddy over someone thinking of him like that.

look what you’ve done

what part was hardest to write?

After the fight and the ignoring and all that pent up anger being released, there was an awkward moment with all this tension between the two in her room - that was challenging for sure. Cause he was being a piece of shit and he himself knew it, she knew it, everybody knew it. But what took some thinking was to be able to show the guy he was before the fight and his insecurities getting the best of him.

were there alternate versions of this fic?

I dabbled with a lot of reasons why they’d fight, but Billy as a person is just sensitive and insecure and him seeing something like that, no matter how innocent or short the exchange could’ve been in reality with her and some nameless stranger could still set him off and trigger the monster he’s got hidden inside. I can’t remember other scenarios I had thought of but that one stuck to me.

sixteen

what part was hardest to write?

The relationship felt natural, like I could hear all the conversations they’ve had and seen everything they’d done together, I really really liked that dynamic but one stupid small part that killed me was writing the douchey boyfriend lol. Ultimately it’s such an insignificant part, so I scrapped any further drama with him and his deal because the story wasn’t supposed to be about him; it was supposed to be about her and Billy, their past, how it affected them both when they saw each other again after so long.

were there alternate versions of this fic?

None actually! I had it in my mind right off the bat that I wanted him to be nervous and caught off guard for once. like I said in the commentary for this, I know his personality, I know he’s quite used to thinking/believing he’s the most powerful in the room but I wanted that to change for this instance, and I strayed away from having him be untouchable or macho in any way.

whipped

what part was hardest to write?

THE KIDS. I’ve never ever written them before, and I even debated watching a few episodes before tackling it.... but I didn’t and I think I pulled it off alright. I loved their humor. I knew Dustin was always being a paranoid goofball, Lucas as the same without all the anxiety or nerdy interests, Mike as impatient and pessimistic, and Will as being very quiet. So yeah, I overcame that doubt and just did what I thought felt right.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

I thought a lot about what movie they’d watch - like a rom com would’ve been pretty funny too, but I had to have him tease and scare the kids so I made their movie of the night thing be Nightmare on Elm Street😂

punch-drunk love

what was the hardest part to write?

A lot of this flowed easy and generally wasn’t stressful at all. Describing him as a fun drunk was a blast. Thinking of what he would he say if he had no filter and felt on top of the world. I can’t think of anything that I was held back by this time, it all came out in just a couple hours when I should’ve been sleeping lol.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

When I was brainstorming by myself I thought it would just be more smutty and desperate or even a little more sad. I had it planned that she’d reject him initially, but then I got an ask that changed the game and I’m really proud of how it turned out.

naive

what part was hardest to write?

I hardly went over it or stressed much other than tweaking a few details, but plot was pretty self explanatory - I think the most difficult part to write was all the possible ways there could’ve been scenarios where he could’ve mislead her

were there any alternate versions of this fic?

I almost wanted to write them in class but thought him on lifeguard duty would’ve been more engaging and had a lot more to go off of

old habits die hard

what part was hardest to write?

Literally everything. every. single. PART about writing people have sex is challenging, omg. Foreplay....down to kissing.....then down to actually fucking, I got red the whole time. Especially after posting it I’d almost pissed myself ‘cause it’s so nerve wracking putting smut out there holy christ.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

I wanted to get into their marriage and relationship but.... tbh I thought everyone would just skip it and get to the good stuff. So yeah there was probably an almost started version on my phone where I had backstory on how he proposed and all but thought no one would care too much lol.

obstacle 1

what part was hardest to write?

Hurt/comfort is a little challenging when you wanna do it differently. I wanted to sway away from her being this perfect female caregiver that knows exactly what to say and what to do cause that’s just so hard to picture when it comes to real life and all, not that I’m mixing fiction and life it’s just sometimes hard to believe that every girl is perfect at taking care of a guy breaking down.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

Nothing too different, I reasoned in my head how he’d get into trouble cause there are infinite ways Billy could’ve fucked up but.... stealing chocolate is pretty funny and juvenile, and he knew it too, but he’d absolutely still get his ass whooped anyway.

playing hooky

what part was hardest to write?

I found it hard to know what they’d do after she got blasted, cause.....what would two teenagers do in a small town skipping school? Also easily taking personal experience for her snapping and getting tired of her careful image cause everybody had these impossibly high expectations for her, but what they’d get up to doing that was ‘illegal’ that they could get arrested for took some time to think about.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

At first I pictured them maybe like breaking in somewhere they weren’t supposed to, hence the ‘we could get arrested’ line, but skinny dipping was my favorite pitch.

thick as thieves

what part was hardest to write?

The ending gave me a tough time, I had to think whether or not if I’d forgive someone for doing that shit to me. It’s happened before, to everybody and myself, the pains of drifting apart and the jealousy that comes with seeing them blossom and become social butterflies, the joys of being in high school... Oh and I’m still working on another part:)

were there alternate versions of this fic?

I dabbled with lots of ideas but I knew I wanted two friends growing apart, a push/pull between their relationship...I don’t remember what else I had planned that I ditched.

the craft (1996)

what part was hardest to write?

Maybe the love spell part. I wanted to write it as severe and dramatic as possible, and really show how desperate and gone he was.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

Hmm, I based this off the film and it does show a lot more about the girl group besides the love spell bit, but I wanted it to focus on that cause it was more interesting fucking with Billy. I liked how dark both the movie and the fic was

in utero

what part was hardest to write?

My obstacle with this one was creating this female Billy in my head, which to me was basically a flawed, outrageous, outgoing/promiscuous high school girl who makes a mistake. Writing him pining was definitely enjoyable, and him practicing his lines on how he’d say how he felt and stuff. The wording was switched around a ton, but I’m fairly happy with it. It’s not perfect, he stutters and trails off because he’s nervous, but in it’s own way I think it’s a perfect display of an insecure guy summoning up any courage he has and trying to shoo away any doubt.

were there alternate versions to this fic?

Oh man, tons of ideas came to my head with this one. I wondered if maybe she could’ve never gotten ‘rid’ of ‘it’ and then they run off in the sunset, raise ‘it’ together.... Billy maturing and finding a home with their own family. BUT the reason I chose the path she took was because she’s just a kid, fresh from high school, had no idea what she was gonna do with no money other than visit her best friend. I think she knew she didn’t want it and couldn’t stand the guy who put her in this position, so she ran.

— so there it all is, kudos to you if you actually read this far down and to anyone who has reblogged or commented on any of these.... THANKYOU🖤🥰✨

And especially thanks to Haiden cause you’re the best

[thisdiscontentedwinter]

Ew, look at this vile attempt at canon erasure and blame shifting/victim blaming courtesy of Scott McCall delusional squad’s honorary member liliaeth: https://liliaeth.tumblr.com/post/184737916176/what-if-scotts-my-best-friend-now-but-not-my

“The problem really was that Stiles didn’t have faith in Scott. If Stiles hadnt lied to Scott for weeks, then there wouldnt have been a problem. But its Stiles lies to Scott, and Stiles betrayal of Scott by conspiring with Theo that led to Theo being able to murder Scott" 

and AGAIN: https://liliaeth.tumblr.com/post/184799264106/theo-really-manipulated-scott-into-thinking-that

"Basically the real problem was Stiles lies. If Stiles hadn’t lied to Scott. Then there wouldn’t have been a problem. Even after Stiles lied to Scott for weeks, and started avoiding Scott, abandoning Scott to Theo’s manipulations, Scott still gave Stiles a chance to explain. Yet instead of saying it was self defense, Stiles instead attacked Scott, lashed out at Scott, and dehumanised Scott. And yet even aftet all that, still all Scott did was to ask Stiles to go talk to his Dad. Whom they both know would do anything for Stiles. My heart broke for Scott in that scene, and I was just so damn pissed of at Stiles after he said ‘some of us are human’, knowing Scotts fears in that regard… It’s why even though I’m a sciles shipper, I did and still do want Stiles to apologize for his betrayal of Scott. One of the worst things the show did, it’s that Stiles was never once held accountable for his behavior. I’d probably like the character better, if he’d shown some understanding that what he did, aka lying to Scott and conspiring with Theo, was wrong" 

No wonder true self righteous hypocrite & petty dictator wannabe Scoot "B-B-B-BUT IT’S NOT SELF DEFENSE ANYMORE!!!!”~“I HAD YOU BEFORE!!!!” McBadCall is liliaeth’s personal fave tbh. He’s literally her fictional stand-in 

DW: This is legitimately hilarious though. 

No, Lil, the real problem is that Scott is a dumb fuck who thinks that a human can take down a chimera with a wrench. 

The real problem is that Theo spins this story of Stiles being so angry and out of control that he manages to beat a chimera--a being with supernatural strength--to death, and Scott doesn’t once go, “Huh, well that doesn’t make sense.” 

And no, Scott did not give Stiles a chance to explain, because the whole “self defence” had already been addressed and dismissed by Scott in a previous episode. Is there a chance he’d change his mind for his best friend? Maybe, because Scott’s moral compass in incredibly dependant on whether or not a deed benefits him or not, but it’s also as wobbly as a drunk barfly at closing time, so who knows? 

I mean, Jesus, the one time the writers actually foreshadow something, and you biscuits miss it completely? Here’s the foreshadowing part: 

Stiles:  Okay… Wasn’t he just trying to kill you, though? I mean, that just sounds like self-defense. 

Scott: It was more than that. I mean, she nearly took off his head.

Stiles: Maybe she had no choice? There’s gotta be a point where self-defense is justified. Tracy killed her own father, and Lucas would have killed you.

Scott: They’re not the bad guys. They’re the victims. We shouldn’t be killing the people we’re trying to save.

Have a read through that again, actually take note of where it positions Scott, and try to keep it in mind as the context when we get to Lies of Omission. Here’s how the confrontation plays out in that, BTW: 

Stiles: Hey, sorry… I had trouble starting the Jeep again.

Scott: That thing’s barely hanging on. 

Stiles: I couldn’t get in touch with Malia or Lydia. 

Scott? Where did you get that? 

Scott: This is yours? Why didn’t you tell me?

Stiles: I was going to. 

Scott: No, but why didn’t you tell me when it happened? 

Stiles: I couldn’t. 

Scott: You killed him? You killed Donovan? 

Stiles: Well, he was going to kill my dad. Huh? Was I supposed to just let him? 

Scott: You weren’t supposed to do this. None of us are. 

Stiles: You think I had a choice? 

Scott: There’s always a choice. 

Stiles: Yeah, well, I can’t do what you can, Scott. I know you wouldn’t have done it. You probably would’ve just figured something out, right? 

Scott: I’d try. 

Stiles: Yeah, because you’re Scott McCall! You’re the true Alpha! Guess what? All of us can’t be true Alphas. Some of us have to make mistakes. Some of us have to get our hands a little bloody sometimes. Some of us are human! 

Scott: So, you had to kill him? 

Stiles: Scott, he was going to kill my dad. 

Scott: But the way that it happened… There’s a point when it’s… It’s not self-defense anymore! 

Stiles: What are you even talking about? I didn’t have a choice, Scott! You don’t even believe me, do you? 

Scott: I want to. 

Stiles: Okay, all right, so… So, believe me then. Scott, say you believe me. Say it. Say you believe me. 

Scott: Stiles, we can’t kill people that we’re trying to save. 

Stiles: Say you believe me. 

Scott: We can’t kill people! 

Stiles: Do you believe that? Well, what do I do about this? What do you want me to do? Okay, just be… Scott, just tell me how to fix this, all right? Please, just tell me, what do you want me to do? 

Scott: Don’t worry about Malia or Lydia. We’ll find them. Maybe… Maybe you should talk to your dad.

So where exactly in here is Scott giving Stiles a reason to explain? And how many verbal cues like “You think I had a choice?” and “What are you even talking about? does he have to steamroll right over in order not to ask what happened? 

Isn’t it funny how in Season 1, Scott tells Derek that the Argents “must have had a reason” to kill all the Hales? Like, he’s defending the family of a girl he barely knows at this point, because he loves her and wants to believe that her family–not even her, but her family–could never do something so vile.

And yet roll around Season 5, and when Theo tells him Stiles killed Donovan, Scott isn’t only so fucking dumb he doesn’t realise Stiles should be incapable of beating a chimera to death, he also doesn’t once say “He must have had a reason.” And, when he confronts Stiles, he doesn’t ask, “Hey, what was your reason for killing that guy?” He just assumes the worst.

I feel that this is the main reason I could never ship Sciles. Because clearly Scott would have approached the entire situation differently if he’d wanted to put his dick in Stiles.

Also, lil, Stiles didn’t “conspire” with Theo. He was blackmailed. There’s a difference. 

@stickykeys633

[mieczyhale]

throwing together some of my recent/ish hc posts/tags for @hellomyguru bc its a thing, babey (i have no idea what you’ve seen and what you havent bc tumblr really just suck like that so lmao)

my tags on this post::  #HELL YEAH HELL YEAH #more pride hcs!!! noice!!#i love these sfm#like klaus always taking part no matter how bad shit is bc HIS PEOPLE!!! and ben trying to punch picketers and homophobes is fucking adorbs#and i would kill (whoop) for the day klaus makes ben corporeal during pride and ben can punch all the people and then disappear#vanya’s is cute. come to the light darling!!#and diego fksgjf okay listen whether one hcs him as bi or not this is 1000% something he’d do either way#he’s supportive!!! and he has lgbtqa+ family!!! and nobody gets to be mean to his family but him!!#see also:: the first year after the apocalypse is avoided five decides to tag along when klaus saying he’s taking dave to#his very first pride. he not only enjoys himself but he learns a lot and either then or over the course of the following weeks figures his#own labels out - bc i hc five as asexual and i just have a thing for klaus being the all knowledgeable one about something for once#and his siblings learning about gender and sexuality from him and maybe discovering something new about themselves along the way!#except luther. he’s a cis hetero and we all know it#but maybe he learns to be a good ally. maybe#i mean probably not but whatever#allison is the only other person in the family who i’d even consider calling straight#bc there’s nothing wrong with being straight and i just.. dont have another label that i think fits her really well#so yeah ive got gender and sexuality hcs for them all flgkscndn happy pride month bitches

my tags on this post:: #’you’re telling me this happens every year?? for a whole month??!’ #actually i need every possible concept of dave experiencing pride month and seeing how far things have come for gays#like rainbow shit everywhere#and of course the legalization of gay marriage#out and proud gay politicians and gay people in positions of power#the amount of support that comes when homophobic shit happens now#homophobia isnt the accepted norm anymore#another thing i like is the concept of - either during pride or just in general - dave being excited to learn about the community as a whole#his boyfriend is a nonbinary pansexual and klaus has explained before what those words mean but dave wants to really understand#we stan a supportive and loving couple#dave has a lot to learn in 2019 but i think this stuff would be the most important and have the most effect on him yknow??#shit isnt perfect but its better and now he can work on getting passed the environment he was raised in#so he can hold klaus’s hand in public and kiss him around other people without panicking and eventually he proposes because HE FUCKING CAN#HE CAN DO THAT. HE CAN JUST.. ASK HIS BOYFRIEND TO MARRY HIM. LEGALLY.#good fucking shit

my tags on this post:: #did you see the state of the sky in the apocalypse?? there’s a chance he really wouldnt have noticed#i mean like yeah it could be a funny plothole#but there could also be reasons for why thats not something he noticed#or idfk man timeline shit#maybe the moon didnt explode the first time around#maybe it did and there’s just another moon somehow some way#maybe he didnt notice bc he was first too scared and then too frenzied and angry probably and then he had shit to focus on and math to do#and then dolores wanted to go on dates to the local wine cellars and flat empty areas that used to be parks and then there was spending days#in the library together like having a girlfriend is a lot of work okay#maybe five just didnt have the time to slowdown and consider things like space#maybe his headspace was too fucked#sometimes you just forget about the moon - i know i do!#so sfgksncjf okay y e ah

my tags on this post:: #YES!!! #yes yes yes #okay #so#everytime someone mentions or even hints at dave having anger issues i wanna fucking cheer bc thats one of my biggest hcs for him#like yeah he’s sweet and gentle and respectful and all that - genuinely a good man - our lil jewish gay#BUT#he did grow up in the 50s and 60s which as op said would have surrounded him with a lot of toxic masculinity. now i dont think he would be#a toxic kind of masculine AT ALL but it definitely would have forced him to hide his emotions and feelings and idk hobbies and of course his#sexuality. and i say hobbies bc there isnt a canon answer for it i dont think but i personally hc dave as being someone who loves art#specifically: drawing. dave keeping a lil sketchbook and some pencils under the pillow on his cot in vietnam?? yes please#so anyway yeah - he wouldnt have really had any good examples of how to properly take care of your anger - although he has enough#heart and common sense to know its really fucking wrong to take it out on women and children and people one is dating WHICH - another hc i#have that ties into this is that somehow his dad found out that he’s gay and beat the crap out of him over it. because unfortunately thats a#thing that happens. so his main male example was an abusive pos. and then he goes to vietnam which is fine because its not like he has#anyone stateside that will miss him - that will talk to him anymore - and its a warzone so there are a lot of ways to work out your anger#and yeah that of course includes bar fights. and he does - usually - try and keep a hold on his anger until he’s away from anyone who might#feel threatened - and he doesnt wanna end up taking out an innocent on accident - but he’s not actually perfect and so sometimes he fails#and it happens around klaus one time and seeing his love’s reaction - the making himself smaller - trying to hide - going quiet and so#clearly afraid - and not just afraid but afraid OF HIM - freezes him to the core where he stands because nobody has ever reacted like that#before. or if they have he never noticed or cared because they didnt matter. but this is klaus. his klaus. who he loves and would never do#anything to hurt him. his klaus who he protects and defends and knows he wants to spend his life with - no matter how impossible it is#he wants to go to klaus and apologize - try to undo the damage done simply by him raising his voice and lashing out - but he doesnt know#what to say or how to say it - he doesnt know what to do with the situation honestly. so he leaves the tent and goes to take his renewed#anger and frustration out on whatever he can find so he can calm down and hopefully get into the right headspace to have whats#no doubt going to be a really hard conversation with his boyfriend. because where do you even start??#but of course they talk it out and dave promises to work on his anger and on how he lets it out and yknow.. its dave so klaus trusts him and#it takes some time - there are some incidents - but dave works hard and learns a lot from klaus - including how to unlearn a lot of shit he#grew up with - and its rough but having a partner from the future who breaks all kinds of barriers definitely helps#so y eah. those are my brief feelings on it and i wanna marry op 

my tags on this post::   #!!!!!!!!!!!! #YES #i adore this post#i could never pinpoint why the introduction on the bus made me feel like That but this is it!!#its just so sweet and innocent - even surrounded by other soldiers in the middle of a warring country#the innocence and unbearable fucking adorableness of their first convo on that bus just… its so bright and lovely it makes everything else disappear#the only thing that matters is the two guys getting to experience that ‘o h’ moment for the first time in their lives bc their childhoods#never let them have that #i assume#bc like op said klaus didnt go to a regular school and he wasnt p much stuck in that house and then he was on the streets so#and for dave like.. i guess he could’ve had that moment in school? but it would’ve been one-sided and he never would have#told anyone. 1960s. gay jewish man. yeah.#they’re each others first (and only) loves and i just really fucking adore that and live off of posts about them 

my tags on this post:: #what if he wasnt dead-dead though???#bc like… the day five found them all dead was apparently the day the apocalypse happened right? so its not like they’d been dead for days#weeks or w.e yknow??#and the time between klaus dying and coming back is varying and undetermined - there’s no canon timing for the length of his deaths#so what if he came back to life??#like okay i know its not really possible in canon bc five buried them i think?? or is that a fanon thing??#i cant remembering #anyway#but still - in general klaus not being permanently dead in the apocalypse is another possibility#and five didnt know about it bc after finding them all he began his 45 year journey#and klaus wakes up alone and essentially has to learn to survive and he doesnt know five was ever there bc..well.. yeah#five is long gone#maybe klaus lives out his days in that wasteland#and he doesnt remember it where five does bc five time traveled back and klaus didnt. the klaus that got stuck in the#apocalypse is a different klaus - like a different timeline. the klaus from ep1 never got stuck in the destroyed future so#he’d have no knowledge or memories of it or anything#or - second thought - he kills himself at some point after waking up and either begs god to let him stay dead or he strikes some kind of#deal with her so he doesnt have to return to whats left of earth#oooo or something happened that put a lock on his powers?? like yknow those cuffs and devices and stuff in stuff in fantasy that freeze the#users abilities?? that’d be an interesting plotpoint bc then like who did it and why and what was the last day really like? yknow#vanya’s meds but More is the idea #just a thought#but anyway idk im just a big fan of klaus with the inability to die and all the possibilities that brings 

my tags on this post::   #i’ve actually never stopped to consider why he didnt notice them except for my v first tua watch-thru#which is odd bc like that seems like a thing one should notice after a few watches??#but w.e #anyway#my only other hc for that part of the episode isnt that klaus didnt notice them bc he’s used to guns#it’s that he didn’t hear them#or that they weren’t loud enough -to him- to register as gunfire initially#bc like one of my close hcs is that he has bad hearing. growing up with people screaming in your ears 24-7 365 can’t exactly be good for#his ears now can it? and with how loud some of them are and how close they can get to him - without touching him - that’s just.. a lot of#fucking volume okay#now add in the academy’s mission alert siren#how loud he listens to his music with headphones on when he’s trying to drown out some REALLY LOUD SCREAMING#and then being near gunfire growing up. those bank robbers had guns and weren’t exactly a big distance away#all the raves and clubs and parties he goes to?? places where music is played so loud the room shakes and you cant hear anything else and#the music itself can be heard from blocks away?? that’s an indeterminable amount of intense noise#and then of course the gunfire of vietnam#so like… boys ears have SUFFERED. whether they wanna acknowledge that in canon or not#so the shooting at the theater - the shooting thats IN the theater - which is large and meant to house sound#thats happening across a big city street from where they’re standing and they’re behind the food truck and if klaus was ordering when it all#started that was just another level of sound and he’s not exactly focused bc everything is awful yknow?? so either it takes him a second to#notice or register it on his own or maybe he doesnt and ben says something?? idk but that’s kinda the field i’ve landed on for that scene#not that im not here for op’s hc!!! bc it really is a good one and it makes sense. im just rambling my own theory here bc i like considering#the Ways for Things sometimes. esp with klaus involved. this does make me wonder tho… if his hearing somehow is -fine- in canon…. h o w?#bc like bitch who tf can take all that and have perfect hearing?? thats gotta be impossible. if they are fine is it related to his powers#somehow?? like.. does his casual passing between life and death all the time mean he doesnt have mortal ear weaknesses? its weird but im..#i’ve got theories. 

my tags on this post:: #probably in the massive fucking pockets of his fluffy coat#see also:: a dealer’s place #a boyfriend’s place#an ex-boyfriend who is also a dealer’s place#a girlfriend’s place #a partner’s place#all ex’s of course bc dave is the only valid romantic relationship#he made friends with the person who owns a nearby thrift store and they help him out#he has a locker at a public place like the ymca#he only has one outfit before returning to the mansion so he has nothing to carry - ever on the move#he thiefs off of people in rehab and crackhouses he stayed in that are dumb enough to leave their shit unattended#when he sees something he likes or he feels its time for an outfit change#he mostly sticks with his lace up pants as far as bottom pieces go bc its much harder to sneak away with skirts#and the kind of crazy pants he likes. there’s only room for one pair of pants for this pan disaster#after returning to the mansion he has access to the funky gay clothes he had managed to aquire before leaving all those years ago#bc like… i kinda hc that he got out of there fast and probably higher than fuck and had nothing packed#have you ever tried to pack while high?? it’s harder than it has any right to be#crack theory:: he had a bag - we just never saw it bc in the beginning he wore it under his floofy coat bc safety and he didnt need it the#rest of the time.#i have a lot of thoughts and headcanony opinions about klaus’s time on the streets so thank u#for giving me a place to dump some of them   

[tumblunni]

Headcanons about maddiman's wife:

* name: Joy Nocturne

* her personality is like your classic 'overbearing wife' or 'loud woman' except its not a bad thing and i hate how its always stereotyped as a bad thing. She's confident and outspoken and badass and these are all the things that made Madds fall in love with her. Its also the things that makes everyone else think she's 'such a nag' and start rumours that their marriage is on the rocks, because he 'must be so whipped', etc. And back when they met in highschool everone thought she was a 'typical american thug' who was 'being a bad influence to that poor honor student'. Basically she's used to people hating her personality and she was already secretly doubting whether her husband also found her annoying/bossy/unattractive cos of this. Like she's usually able to be confident in the face of hate from strangers but as she grew to love this man she felt her old insecurities coming back. They were both having trouble talking about their feelings and worrying that their spouse didnt love them...

* oh and BIGGEST HEADCANON: she very much loved him and there was no villain of this story, just a sad tale of two people falling apart due to miscommunication. I think its infinately sadder if they were total soulmates and never stopped loving each other even after this tragic falling out. I feel like Joy just had to make the decision that was right for her son when her husband was never around to be part of his life. And with the way maddiman acted she had every reason to feel like he'd stopped loving her...she didnt leave because she hated him but because she didnt know why he was so distant and thought he hated her...

* She never remarried. She did manage to live a full life and raise their son to be an upstanding human being, but she never forgot about madds and never found anyone she loved more than him.

* She was actually there when he died. The point where he passed out midway through writing a diary entry wasnt actually the exact moment he died, his coworkers found his comatose body and rushed him into surgery. He was on life support for a few days befofe he faded away, having never woken up. Joy rushed over on the fastest flight possible to get to see him before it was too late, but she only managed to arrive in time to see his yokai self emerging and vanishing into the ether. This phantasm haunted her for the rest of her life and she sorta inherited his fatal yokai obsession, in hopes that what she saw was real...

* after her son died at just 17, she became even more tied to the desperate hope of her husband's old fairytales. Ultimately though, she was never able to find him. She actually could have walked straight past him and not been able to see him. And madds wouldnt have recognised her, only wondered why something in his heart says that this particular trespasser in the haunted hospital should be guided to the exit without harm.

* they first met in high school, oddly enough due to maddiman's dad being a massive asshole. Nogut always pressured his son to be perfect and live out all his dreams for him, blablabla, gotta get to the best schools and never get a single bad grade. Joy and madds werent in the same class so they hadnt talked much, and she only recently transferred anyway. But one day Nogut was in school for a parent teacher conference and he was being his usual pissy entitled self, blah blah im too important to be here and my son is the cause of all my problems somehow. So he got uhh.. "Distracted". Aka being an absolute fuckin creeper to underage highschool girls! Thus the day Joy first became friends with maddiman was also the day she became mortal enemies with his dad by kicking him in the balls. And shortly afterwards she bumped into maddiman who was hyperventilating in the same closet she coincidentally picked while hiding from Groinally Harmed Anger Dad. He was having a panic attack from the general stress of his dad being here, and she helped support him through it which became a really valued memory of his, and why he sees her as his hero. Well, that and shortly after when she was like 'lol i just met this total creeper and kneed him in the nads' 'THATS MY DAD' 'geez sorry dude' 'NO THATS AMAZING'

* she also helped him pull off his ultimate escape from trash dad. They had a plan in place for a long time that as soon as he turned 18 they were getting on a motorbike and riding off to Anywhere But Here. But he didnt expect her to literally bring a birthday cake and throw it in his dad's face! And then that was the beginning of their relationship. Madds had totally been crushing on her for quite a while but never knew how to confess, until the sheer awesomeness of that moment made him accidentally squeak it out while they were riding for their lives from an angry old man.

* oh and also there were probably a lot of funny cute clueless moments where it kept going over joy's head that he had a crush on her? I was thinking of a cute idea for a valentines day flashback where maddiman was too shy to give her a box of chocolates and she comes along like "man i didnt get any chocolates im glad you managed to get some!" "U-uhh no i umm..wanted to give them to someone but i...didnt." "Oh that sucks dude! At least now you can eat them all to yourself to help forget that girl. Lemme sneak one, tho!" And thus he ended up sharing the box of chocolates with the perosn he wanted to, even if she had no idea. And it was a very good day!

* also i think considering the pattern of him bottling up his feelings and running from relationship problems, it seems likely that he ran from the altar on his wedding day. But it was also one of the only times ever that that happened and it wasnt super sad. As he does, he got all worked up into a mess of anxiety and convinced he knew the only answer- the stupidest and most reckless answer! So even though he loved this woman he was so scared that he'd be a bad husband that he tried to jump out the window at the last second without even once trying to actually talk to her about any of this. But this time she did manage to find him! All the friends and family were like 'ugh leave him, he doesnt love you', but she knew there had to be more to it so she ran out in the rain in her wedding dress and searched for miles until she found him sobbing in a public bathroom. They managed to talk it out and get to the bottom of his feelings and actually resolved something for once, and it all went okay. It kinda helped that seeing her turn up all bedraggled in the wreckage of the dress she loved so much, bleeding from her tight heels and fighting off several biker gangs along the way helped convince him that "hey maybe she thinks i'm worth fighting for, so i should try and believe her". So yeah then she swept him off his feet and they danced all night as everyone else in the church was all "ugh she looks awful" and "why would she take him back", but the moment was so magical that they just didnt care. And thats how the biggest failure of a wedding was also the happiest day of their lives! (..though sadly the same doubts and communication difficulties would come up again and not be resolved so easily...)

* i keep flip flopping on what career i want to give her, but at the moment im thinking possibly owns a lil bakery/coffee shop type place? Madds is one of those people who cant stand the bitterness of tea/coffee and prefers caffinated sodas instead, but he used to drink strong coffee every day back when he was human just because his wife made it. He loved all the rest of her cooking so itd be cruel to say no! Its a lil detail that i figured would be cute but also foreshadow how he'd meet his tragic end, as it shows he's capable of bottling up his feelings for years even when talking would be so much easier. Also probably a comedic note that he's coming up with nonsensical mad science techniques to make himself able to drink coffee! "Shall i genetically modify my tastebuds or create an undetectable translucent plastic armour plate for my tongue?"

* also maybe she could make cinnamon rolls shaped like madds's doofy cyclops head when they reunite in the future. Just because i want to eat that.

[kuro-shit-posts]

A, F, J, P for sebastian, UT, ciel and vincent?

Hello! im so so sorry but im not super familiar with Vincent’s character and i didnt want to write something bad and disappoint you so i decided not to write for him, i hope thats ok! But i dohope you still enjoy the other characters!!———–Sebastian: A-Affection: completed in a previous post

F-Fun Times: Sebastian’s true self is still a bit enigmatic, however I feel that the real, demon, Sebastian doesnt really find many activities to be fun except for things like the manipulation of others or killing things (specifically killing sprees). Regarding his affinity for cats, i feel that playing with kitties would be the closest, if not the only, human “activity” he finds entertaining. As to whether Sebastian prefers to be in a group or alone, Sebastian doesnt really care for other demons, and clearly he isnt fond of angels or reapers either. Though Sebastian finds humans interesting, i think he finds them enjoyable in the way we enjoy looking at lobsters in a tank before we eat them. Its fun to watch them move around and interact with eachother, hell even after you take one home you might name it or think its cute, but ultimately its still food and you intend to eat it, not take it to the park and have a picnic because you enjoy its company. So needless to say Sebastian prefers to be alone.

J-Jokes: Clearly Sebastian is very talented in telling jokes but i think thats simply a product of being alive for so long and the fact that humans’ sense of humor hasnt really change through the centuries. Sebastian enjoys possessing the ability to make humans laugh as he enjoys being the center of attention and earning praise from humans. Though I dont believe he finds much humor in what humans find funny, i do believe he has his own sense of humor and for a demon he’s pretty giggly. For the most part, Sebastian makes himself laugh (especially in the form of puns), though he oftens finds humor in the foolishness of other (particularly Ciel). Sebastian is pretty quick to get a joke that would be considered funny to humans of any century, however, jokes that pertain to current or recent events tend to take him a bit longer, especially if he hasnt been amongst humans in a few decades. I think as the centuries went on, i.e. entering the 20th and 21st centuries, Sebastian would be even slower to get jokes as things move incredibly fast during the modern era. He’d finish a contract in the 80s and come back in 2010’s and be completely lost even though it had only been 30 years. What on earth was a Vine? Why did humans find plants so funny all of a sudden. Wait…when they say vine they aren’t referring to the botanical organism? He’d be one of those people that catches on right as a trend is ending or even way after it has ended because modern era trends, especially in humor, tend to last for months at the very most; which would be like miliseconds to a demon who experiences 10 years like 10 minutes.

P-Personality: First and foremost, I think that an intelligent partner would suit him best. As it is, Sebastian is alot smarter than the majority of humans, reapers, and quite possibly other demons, so regardless of who he chooses as a partner, they need to be able to keep up with his mental abilities. Next on the list of importance, I’d say maturity is something Sebastian values. Sebastian finds immature people destestable and someone’s level maturity makes or breaks his perception of them. After those two traits I think things tend to get a bit more flexible, I feel like Sebastian would prefer someome who had a sense of adventure, he doesnt care for boredom or laziness so someone who would want to get up and do things, or go with him to obscure places would be right up his alley. Someone with a unique perspective on the world would be desirable as well, Sebastian finds humans incredibly perplexing, so a human that even other humans have difficulty deciphering would be attractive to him as he likes a challenge. Speaking of challenges, he wouldnt want someone who’d come to him too easily, though he wouldnt want to work terribly hard either, he likes the chase but only when he knows there’s a reward waiting for him at the end. Sebastian would also find perseverance attractive, especially if it was facing something they feared or a task that proved to be incredibly challenging. I feel like he’d prefer a thrill-seeker as well. Most importantly though, he’d want someone to be able to completely accept and cherish his true form. Sebastian loves being a demon so someone who loved him like he loved himself would be absolutely necessary.

Ciel:A-Affection: Ciel would definitely be the type of s/o to buy you a diamond necklace before he’d think to give you a hug. Ciel hates physical contact, period. But i do think that he would tolerate it if his s/o really wanted physical affection and they were the one to initial it. Ciel’s not too good with words of romance either, so the majority of his love would be shown through the purchasing of items or perhaps the rememberance of a favorite meal or song and providing his s/o with such on frequent occasions. Ultimately he is still pretty distant and any type of affection would be rare. Though I think Ciel would prefer a distant partner who wouldnt demand alot of his attention, i feel like a clingy partner would complement his personality better. The reason being that Ciel acts distant and cold to protect himself, deep down he stills craves affection like any other human, especially one that has been broken. He’d need a partner that is able to understand this and is able to compensate for his lack of means to show affection by being clingy or affection enough for the both of them.

F-Fun Times: Ciel primarily enjoys activities that challenge him mentally, chess(obviously), reading, etc. On the other hand, Ciel is definitely not fond of any type of physical activity. To be even mediocre at anything that involves physical exertion, he has to put in his all. Ciel isnt the most social person, he’ll be social if he has too and he’s pretty damn good at acting but if he has the choice he prefers to do things he finds entertaining by himself. Ciel is pretty introverted and finds the company of others incredibly draining even if he enjoys the person or people themselves.

J-Jokes: Oh no no no, Ciel is t e r r i b l e when it comes to telling jokes. Ciel tends to be very left brained and unfortunately for him, that leaves him pretty empty handed in the comedy department, as we obviously saw during the Circus Arc when it took him hours to make Undertaker (a man who is notoriously giggly) produce even a miniscule chuckle. Ciel enjoys puns on occasion and only when theyre tasteful. Ciel is more so a fan of witty comments but an intelligent pun tickles his fancy every once in a while. However he hates Sebastian’s constant puns (mostly because he is the subject of them). Ciel is actually pretty slow to get most jokes. He doesnt really understand many types of common humor unless its witty or sarcastic. He really doesnt care for humor in general, to be honest, he hates smiling and being happy, it reminds him of the dwindling time he has left, and how he is technically on borrowed time. Ciel hates humor because he almost feels guilty for laughing or enjoying himself. He feels as if he doesnt deserve happiness after what he has sacrificed and for the selfish reasons he did so. In short, humor is not a friend of Ciel.

P-Personality: Ciel would best be suited by someone who has a personality opposite to his. Ciel isnt cold by nature, Ciel is cold because of a traumatic experience. Ciel’s aloof demeanor is more so a shield rather than a legitimate personality trait. Underneath that shield, Ciel’s a sweet person, he craves love and happiness just like anyone else, perhaps more than most people because he has been so fiercely denied it. Because Ciel is no longer able to access those feelings of love and happiness he would best be complimented by someone who could do that for him. Someone who could provide him with positivity and allow him to view things more optimistically would be ideal. Though, he would best be suited by someone with a calmer persona, they would have to be down to earth as he would most likely view them as his stability. Someone with a motherly aura who could take care of him instead of him having to take care of them. That type of person would attract him and be an incredibly good fit for his personality. Other personality traits wouldnt hold as much merit with him, except for maybe intelligence, Ciel wouldnt be fond of a partner who couldnt keep up with him mentally.

Undertaker:A-Affection: Completed in a previous post

F-Fun Times: Undertaker enjoys activities that have to do with the strange and unconventional. Undertaker enjoys things he doesn’t understand, I feel like that’s why he’s so fascinated wih death. Death is quite the anomaly and he very much enjoys the feeling of curiosity. Honestly Undertaker is pretty fond of gore as well, he likes cutting things open in his free time and seeing whats inside, not only because he is fascinated with how the insides of the creature work but because he enjoys the look of bloodied flesh, as gross as it sounds. Aside from things that pertain to death, Undertaker enjoys other unconventional activities as long as they dont bore him. He doesnt much care whether or not theyre productive activities, however he cant stand idle activities that completely waste his time. He’s pretty lazy but he doesnt take pleasure in wasting his immortality on things that serve no ultimate purpose. Discovering new, completely bizarre things is his favorite activity. He doesnt much care whether or not he has any company to do this with, he does what he wants regardless of anyone else. Though if he had to chose he would probably prefer the company of a companion to assist him in his activities.

J-Jokes: This man L O V E S jokes. I mean, he straight up values them in the same way normal people value currency. Undertaker isn’t particularly good at telling jokes himself but he certainly appreciates the art of comedy. He enjoys puns, he enjoys anything that might make him laugh. However, his favorite type of comedy is either slapstick or simply watching someone unknowingly make a fool of themselves. Undertaker is most fond of the comedy that is unexpected and happens naturally. He is always the first to get a joke. Jokes to him are a fine art, and honestly even if he doesnt get a joke, the fact that he couldnt understand makes him laugh anyway. The only jokes Undertaker doesnt enjoy are corny jokes. If unexpected/slapstick comedy is caviar to him, dad jokes are dollar store spray cheese. He hates dad/corny jokes, he finds them terribly overused and believes the only people who find them funny have a horribly underdeveloped sense of humor.

P-Personality: Undertaker would best fit with someone who is somewhat similar to him. Undertaker enjoys happy-go-lucky people whom see the beauty in laughter and pursue happiness. Despite being consistently cast off in the dark shadows of death and the grimness of grim reapers, Undertaker values optimism and positivity. Undertaker also values uniqueness and is drawn to those that possess strange qualities or quirks. He likes strange things and would prefer a partner who could satiate his hungry for unconventionality. Undertaker would also want someone who could make him laugh and value humor in the same way he did. He would clash with someone who was too serious, Undertaker has seen a lifetime of seriousness and gloom, he couldnt stand a partner who took their time in the world for granted and spent it focusing on the bad instead of trying to achieve happiness.

[sevngmin]

family doctor!seungmin

a/n:  it was hard to find pictures of clinics;-; so i tried to go according to colour scheme! this fic is also dedicated to the 2 seungmin stans, annie and jupiter,, i hope yall like it^^// request

seungmin... graduated at the top of his class for family medicine

cute looks+good grades?? destined to do well fam

eventually he became a doctor in seoul national univ. hospital, one of the top hospitals in seoul

his niche wasnt really paediatrics but he enjoyed the company of children that the ceo gave him the offer in the department

seungmin declined, choosing to stay in family medicine

however patients who are fairly young are always numbered to his room so its all good

sometimes he’s on ER(emergency room) duty and 80% of female patients develop an instant crush on him

its funny cause when he measures their heart rate it spikes abnormally high and he gets flustered, “why is your heart rate so high?”

and doesnt notice the growing blush in their cheeks

anyhow, that was on rare occasions when he needs to cover duties for his colleague and close friend, jeongin

seungmin always wears this white coat with pororo stickers decorated on his name tag

coat pockets filled with candy and stickers to reward the children for behaving well

really hates to administer injections as he really doesnt want to hurt the children

but for the sake of their health he had to

and shower them with loads of candies and stickers after that

sometimes he’s also a FPC(first patient clinic) doctor

fpc: a doctor assigned to a particular patient with complicated problems, to avoid confusion, these patients go to the same doctor consequently for their diagnosis and reports

and when he sees familiar faces his eyes light up 10 times more, eyes crinkling into crescents

he’s just so friendly, children dont even hate going to the doctor’s because of him

while checking their lungs seungmin would squat down to their eye-level to talk to them, to distract them

children willingly open their mouths to let him check their tonsils too

children rarely cry during his consulations, because seungmin is that good with children

and they go out happy

which makes you wonder what kind of spell seungmin casts on the kids to make them happy

you, a permanent in the ER, deal with all sorts of people everyday

frantically rushing in every minute, life and death right at its doorstep

sometimes you see seungmin in the ER for cover duty, and he was definitely a sight for sore eyes

but you never approached him, not wanting him to see you in messy hair and makeup almost all gone

you always see him cooped up in his room during lunch break, and you also didnt have the courage to ask him out for lunch, since the both of you werent close either

in reality, seungmin always cooks his own lunch and saves them in a bento to eat during lunch break

its much more economical and healthy, the only times he eats from outside are company gatherings or jeongin forcing him to come along which he would immediately agree imo

seungmin’s cooking is actually one of the best out of all of the doctors, since he lives alone and living on ramen wasnt exactly the healthiest

which lowkey explains why he’s so damn smart, both booksmart and streetsmart

strangely, he hasnt have much experiences with girls

all of his knowledge are from romcom kdramas btw

but he does know how to be a gentleman around girls,, a huge plus point

aNYWHO the gods decided to shine on you and seungmin was in ER duty for this whole month

because jeongin was down with pneumonia, and was unfit for duty

definitely not missing out naggings from seungmin saying he should stop eating churros

you knew jeongin fairly well, as your same-shift colleague in the ER with a very cute friend

and when he was down with pneumonia you didnt know whether to thank him or kill him

because, seungmin would take over jeongin, which meant he would be on the same shift as you

you got to see him, but also you didnt want him to see you

what will he think of you? will he hate you? many questions filled your mind

all of them were forgotten the moment seungmin approached you to say hi

“hi, im seungmin! im from the family doctors’ side, but im here to cover jeongin for the month. and ive seen you around, but i didnt really catch your name.”

“i-i’m y/n! im a permanent here. jeongin’s friend too.” you stuttered, which made seungmin giggle

you stared at him weirdly, which made him clear his throat, “im sorry i mustve offended you.”

“no... its fine. i understand that ER duty isnt the best and we’re on night duty too.”

seungmin looked slightly offended at your rebuttal, but still regained his composure

usually, there werent many patients at night but there was this one little boy who couldnt stop crying because of a high fever

you were flustered, as jeongin was the one who always tended to younger patients

just then, a knight in white armour(quite literally) came rushing by your side to placate the crying child

the child stopped crying as soon and seungmin tended to him, and the whole consultation was just a breeze

the poor child had suffered from chicken pox, and he had to be isolated in a different room in the hospital

both you and seungmin were sad, the child would be both lonely and in pain(?)

since the child brought down the mood for the both of you, you decided to get 2 cups of hot cocoa to cheer him and yourself up

“don’t worry. the child will get better.” you patted his arm(which was your boldest move of the day), handing him the hot cocoa

he looked at you with puppy eyes, the brightening up slightly, “i hope he will.”

“he will, with your expertise, im sure he will soon.” you comforted, unaware that seungmin’s heart was beating wildly at your comment.

seungmin was practically skipping back home when his shift ended

now night shifts wasnt as suckish anymore with you around seungmin

the both of you would always joke around with each other, you “accidentally” squirting saline solution onto seungmin and he’d be like

“hEy y/n this would be a good time to express my affection for you!!”

you’d be like nell ho bc 1. you didnt want to get soaked and 2. too close for your heart to function properly

mostly 2.

but the both of you stop your playful banter until chan came along to tell the both of you off to “stop acting like a love-struck couple”

even after his duty in the ER, seungmin would approach you for lunch break, to jeongin’s surprise

hes like, “hyung, you never ever ask me to go for lunch”

“im sick of my food anyway”

“sStop LyING i know you like y/n”

“i suddenly love jjangmyeon lets order some and share with her”

sometimes seungmin would cook you a bento too, knowing youre too busy

aww

tbh you were starting to catch on a lil but you didnt want to give yourself false hope

until one day jeongin steps in to play cupid

sOoooo jeongin tells you that seungmin needs help with some wound dressing thingy

which you nearly wanted to question him but went with it anyway

and when youre in seungmin’s room there was no patient, only seungmin attentively typing away on his desktop

and he was wearing black-rimmed round glasses with slightly curled hair

a whole boyfriend look ngl

but you shook that off, asking seungmin if he needed help with anything

seungmin tilted his head in confusion, “no..?”

just then, the lock of the door went click, signalling that it was locked

“jeongin.” the both of you sighed in unison, shaking your heads

you were unsure of what to do, so you just released your ponytail and sat on the examination bed

“rough day?” seungmin speaks up, gulping slightly

“yeah, there were so many patients today.” you sighed, “even the nurses werent enough to help.”

“stop talking and confess already!” you hear jeongin’s voice at the other side of the door, as the both of you widened your eyes

“confess... what?” seungmin laughed awkwardly

“yeah... what?” you smiled awkwardly, avoiding seungmin’s eyes

seungmin decided that he needed to man up and say something about it, so he just got up from his seat and brisk-walked towards you

and he cups your face ever so gently and says,

“can i kiss you?”

you were flustered, and nodded meekly

and yes that was you and seungmin’s first kiss and love

young love

when will i ever

anyhow!! seungmin would always pick you up from home to the hospital and vice versa

sometimes he stays over at your place,, your mom doesnt mind

because!whatta sweet man bringing my daughter home!!so that she saves on train fares

seungmin shocks you everytime you find out something new about him

just like at a company gathering, all of the doctors gathered at a karaoke and seungmin went up first with a day6 song

and his vocals?? sWOON

and next he sang stitches and had hes eyes on you all the time

but heres the thing... the both of you cant let the entire hospital find out about your relationship if you wanna live in peace

so the both of you are like business terms until you step out of the hospital lol

would make you food! Everyday!

and also eat with you during lunch

wouldnt mind ER duties bc ur there

highkey wants to send a complaint to make you work at paediatrics so yall can see each other more often

backhugs! are! a! thing!

be it seungmin hugging you or you hugging him... the both of you live for hugs

likes to link pinkies

star watching at the rooftop... peaceful

with hot chocolate in hands too

there was once you got really sick and had to stay home

seungmin was dead worried he even took days off to take care of you

doctor kim doesnt only take care of kids

his masters aint for nothing

people started to wonder why the both of you were off work at the same time lol but they just shrugged it off

except jeongin

jeongin wants the both of you to get married

and the both of you do

BONUS:

the whole hospital didnt know of your relationship until you started to send out wedding invitations

“youre getting married to dr kim?? seungmin?? from our hospital??” was prolly the most asked question after “congrats! when are yall having kids??”

you were lucky it was a secret till you marriage lol

fast forward to when you gIve birth wOOSH

isnt this bonus too much of one

seungmin didnt want to faint so he was just by your side helping you keep c a l m

you had much more strength than he thought you would so he smiled:)thru:)the:)pain:)

you were in more pain so he understood that

you gave birth to a lil bby girl aww

your husband couldnt be more happy

finally someone made use of his medical knowledge to take care of his daughter

subconciously mumbles medical terms to his daughter in attempts to make her fall asleep

“seungmin... if you continue doing this... our daughter will graduate med school at 5.”

it does work better than classical music tho ngl

your daughter indeed took after her dad.. learning how to walk at 8 months and talk at 10 months

you would sometimes bring her to work and people always tell you that shes a carbon copy of seungmin

big eyes, milky white skin... yeah

has a pic of the three of you on his desk its just so endearing

“is that your child?”

“yes its my daughter and beautiful wife!!!”

and you actually brought your daughter into seungmin’s clinic... he turned into a puddle of goo

such a fool for his daughter smh

and a fool for you too

[legolasgoldy]

🤗 || 🎶 || 😡 || 🏷️ || 📖 || 🛏 || 💚 || 👫 || 💔 || 💝 || 🚀

My muse in a relationship ?s

🤗Are they physically affectionate?

Yes! Very much. He’ll hold hands a lot, give hand kisses, cheek kisses, play footsie, nuzzle, put his arms around him, rest their foreheads together. etc. Hes likes being physically affectionate

This could also work for the affectionate in public question but he’ll do it any of what i said above at home or in public. The only difference is, he’ll only give one or two kisses in public at a time, and at home they can make out.

🎶 Do they have a type? 

Yes! He tends to fall for interesting unique people. Whether its a boy or girl, if they interest him and are unique with a personality that appeals to him, he’s at risk of falling for them.

Looks wise, he does gravitate towards interesting looking people as well. Hes demi so hes not sexually attracted at first, but he will find them very very good looking and will get heart eyes. They tend to be uniquely pretty, and very naturally pretty. They wont need to try at all for Finrod to find them gorgeous. Also, they always have a gorgeous smile.

To better elaborate, some examples would be. Finrod’s Maglor is very quirky, even if hes a prince he doesnt particularly look it. He’ll have very unruly frizzy hairs at the sides of his face when its humid, and cow licks on top of his head. but very very soft emotional grey eyes, dresses a bit plain and disheveled at times, most times has muddy boots. Pays more attention to music than looking princely. Smells like harp strings and soaps he uses. Very introverted but wonderful at performing music, and has a secret genuine smile he only does around Finrod that he just goes crazy over. Secretly loves dancing, hips wiggle when excited, has the cutest giggle.

Finrod’s wife in some aus is Italian ( middle earth version of Italian). She has a pretty accent that gets deeper when upset or sassy. Has a very specific clothing style according to her culture. Has a completely different culture than Finrod does and he loves learning about it and participating. Loves sparring and will throw Finrod down on his butt every time. Shes very “i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick maglor’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass” XD Again has a pretty smile too.

Rhys is extremely unique and why Finrod fell so hard. Pale with long fluffy white hair, white eyebrows and eyelashes. Cloudy eyes because hes blind,  full pale lips with pink tint. Makes a lot of facial expressions that give away how hes feeling, eye contact is never ever needed, hes got a unique way of expressing himself with other types of body language, and of course with words. Theres just something about all those expressions, the way he smiles, and how his eyelashes flutter when his eyes are part of the way open showing his cloudy eyes that just.. drew Finrod in. Everything he does is so intriguing and has a way of making Finrod smile, even when Rhys is a bit sarcastic. Theres a gentleness, love and loyalty to him along with layers upon layers of other things like shyness, bitterness, frustration, a little afraid, stubbornness. And of course everyone has so many layers to their personality, but his in particular Finrod fell in love with.  Obviously there are even more unique things like his mutation, but even without it Finrod would have still been just as intrigued. The way he sits at windows for warmth, the look on his face when he eats sweets, his smile, his laugh, the way he says certain words in his accent,  how he can melt with just a small physical gesture or when holding a soft bunny. Despite everything hes been through, hes still soft and sweet and beautiful, any roughness around the edges Finrod loves just as much. He embraces the uniqueness in its entirety, whether Rhys may consider some aspects of himself flawed or less than perfect, Finrod just sees his unique Rhys, perfect just the way he is in every way.

😡What are their deal breakers?

Nothing turns him off from a person faster than seeing them being hateful to someone. Just needlessly underhanded and hateful to someone who did nothing wrong. Like bullying, tripping someone just to be mean or throwing stuff at someone for no reason. In general, if they pick on people and bully them. But chances are Finrod wouldnt have been too interested in them if he didnt know them well enough yet to know their true nature.

Cheating. Or even just implying they would cheat turns him off so fasttt. A random example would be If Finrod had a crush on someone who happened to be dating someone. He wouldnt ever bring it up or imply that he was crushing, its rude and he would respect they were in a relationship. But if they started talking to him about how they would cheat with someone or even him, or even try to kiss him. Nope, turned off, right then. He could understand if they werent happy in their relationship and wanted to end it and find someone else, thats perfectly normal and fine, but not cheating and wanting both people ( or more than both).

Insulting him or his friends/family. Theres a difference between playful banter/playful insults and flat out true insults.  This may or may not be something that builds up to it being a deal breaker. If someone happens to tell him his hair looks awful one day hes gonna take it as them letting him know as a favor so he wouldnt have walked around like that too long or something so he could fix it. Thats totally fine and normal, but if someone makes that an every day thing where they constantly are insulting his hair, his clothes, his work, his food, etc. If they insult everything about him constantly hes gonna be turned off from them. However, before he does anything hes gonna talk to them about it first and let them know how theyre making him feel. Then their reaction will determine whether or not its a deal breaker. They would probably remain only friends though.

Similarly, if he hears someone outright insult a friend of his or family member hes gonna be turned off right then. A little communication will be applied again but still, only remain friends most likely.  It depends on the situation.

🏷️ Do they give their partners cute nicknames?

He does! If his partners name is long he’ll shorten it to a nickname. Rhys’ name is short already so he wont do that, but he’ll use things like “ Love” or very possibly a term of endearment in Gaelic that Rhys likes. Or maybe darling. Things like that. But I doubt he would ever say “Babe” or “Sweetheart”. He uses sweetheart for little kids, and babe just sounds funny to him.  He would never say Baby for sure.

📖 What is their favorite outside of the bedroom activity to do with their partner?

I dont know that he has a favorite. He likes cooking together, going for walks, going to the park… So many things… if he had to pick a favorite its a tie between Cuddling on the couch with Rhys explaining tv shows, movies, and books while having a snack; and cooking together.

  🛏What is their favorite bedroom activity to do with their partner?

Well..Reading for one thing. They do most of their reading before bed all cuddled up and that technically counts for this question because its in the bedroom.

In terms of physical bedroom activities, he just likes kissing and making love in general with Rhys in any way they feel like. He could never choose a favorite if he tried, its all heavenly to him.

💚Are they prone to jealousy?

Not really. Finrod gets more sad and envious rather than jealous. For example, if before they became a couple, someone flirted with Rhys or Rhys flirted with someone, he would get a bit sad and envy them. He would never say anything though, hes too polite so there would never be any resentful feelings of jealousy or anything. Just a bit pouty.  Unless the person flirting with Rhys, or who Rhys was flirting with, was a jerk then he would be resentful toward that person and very protective. Most likely he would just talk to Rhys about it, communication is the best thing for it.

Although, if he and Rhys ( or just in general he and a partner, this applies always) were dating, he would never ever get jealous, sad or, envious because there would be no reason to. He trusts Rhys completely and knows he would never cheat on him, so if anyone ever flirted with Rhys, his response wouldnt be jealousy, it would be to politely let the person know Rhys was his boyfriend. If that didnt work and they still were bothering Rhys, then he’d tell them to get lost.  Probably growl if the person is stubborn and takes it to far.

👫Do they display affection in public? What about in private?

This ties in with the first question. He’ll hold hands, give hand kisses, cheek kisses, play footsie, nuzzle, put his arms around him, rest their foreheads together, and one or two kisses at a time maybe three. He wont make out in public ( unless theyre somehow hidden they might have a mini make out, like ex: making out under their umbrella at the beach)  but is very affectionate in a tasteful way. Granted terribly sappy, but tasteful.

The only difference between public and private is that they kiss a lot in private, will definitely make out for as long as their hearts desire. They also have a lot of sex.

💔Do they have a certain type of person they will not enter into a relationship with? 

Going back into the deal breaker question, he will never enter a relationship with someone whos a bully to anyone or him. Its just not going to happen, ever.  If someone doesnt treat people right or him right, he doesnt want any sort of relationship with them at all.

💝How long until they feel secure and comfortable in a relationship?

It depends on the relationship. With Rhys he was always comfortable because they had been friends for years prior. Sure a little awkward, but also comfortable. Since they had been best friends i think it was a little scary. Finrod didnt want to ruin their friendship but they both knew things would get better rather than anything getting ruined. They fully trusted each other so they knew they would always be together regardless and let themselves follow where ever their feelings led. I would say after a few months of dating they were pretty secure, a little awkward and it felt like a dream, but secure and comfortable. In terms of being comfortable with new stages in the relationship thats something different, they took each step slowly at a comfortable pace.

In a different situation, in general it would take him several months to feel secure and comfortable, possibly almost a year if he and the person hadnt known each other that well before they started dating. That would mean they dated in order to get to know each other and it takes a long time to fully get to know someone that well.

🚀 How far are they willing to go for the person they love?

Finrod would do anything his love needed. Anything. Finrod would kill for Rhys if he had too.

That being said, Rhys is someone he trusts completely and he wouldnt ever be in a relationship if he didnt trust his partner like that wholly. Rhys would never ask him to do anything unless there was a solid good reason. Finrod knows that. So if a reason ever presented itself he would do what ever Rhys needed in a heartbeat.

Doing anything to protect Rhys isnt even debatable, he would protect Rhys with his last dying breath if he had to.

[cb-143]

XENO-T reaction: Their s/o covers their mouth while smiling/laughing because of insecurities

Anon:  Can you please make a reaction when their s/o never really smiles or covers their mouth when they smile/laugh and when the boys ask them why they do that they confess that they're insecure about the gap between their front teeth (with jenissi please) (I hope this isn't too weird or too specific haha and I hope you unterstand what I mean:') )

Thanks again to @kindasouta for l’inspiration :D

P-Goon

He was out in a small café with you. You only had a cup of tea, but he had a latte, with lots of milky foam cream stuff. It looked delicious. You barely took any sips, not wanting anyone to see the gap in your teeth as you felt so insecure.

Sehyuk took a sip of his latte, the foam leaving a white moustache above his upper lip. However, he didn't mind it, and, wanting to make you laugh, he didn't wipe it away, but accompanied that new moustache of his with a goofy smile. You couldn't hold back, but laughed loudly at that, showing off your teeth in the process. It warmed Sehyuk's heart to see you laughing like that, so freely, loudly, and without holding back. He didn't want you to feel insecure, and if he could fix that by appearing like an idiot, then he would do just that.

Jenissi

He didn't mind if you wanted to hide. Of course, he loved everything about you, and he knew that it wasn't good that you felt insecure, but something like that couldn't be fixed so easily. You were allowed to not be comfortable with something. Still, he'd throw in a compliment every now and then. He'd not only compliment your smile, but everything else he loved about you, whether it was your outfit that day, your hair style, or something you made for him. He was going to take little steps to make you comfortable with yourself and make you appreciate that part of your body as well. He didn't care what other people thought of you, or that gap, he wanted you to like yourself.

Hojoon

He knew how insecure you felt, but he didn't really have any ideas on how to convince you of the opposite. Still, he tried his best. He suggested taking selfies with you, or of you. It might make you uncomfortable, or you still hide your face, but he means well, he really does. He compliments you, too. One night, you were out camping. You looked at the stars, seeing how pretty they were. “You know about constellations?” You asked him. Hojoon nodded, but looked at you, instead of at the stars. “I think there's.. that belt thing? But there's one missing in the middle.” You pouted, wanting to see it fully. “Just because there's a.. gap in a constellation.. doesn't make it any less beautiful. Makes it more unique though.” He still stared at you. You, realising his metaphor, looked back at him in shock. You blushed, seeing that the real stars weren't up there, but in your boyfriend's eyes. How much you must have hurt him by thinking so badly of you. In Hojoon's eyes, you were so beautiful, much prettier than any constellation could be.

Sangdo

His solution would be photos. You'd wake up one day, finding a post-it-note on the pillow, right next to your head, reading “What is beauty?” But that was only the first step. You were alone in the house, as Sangdo had to leave early, but everywhere in the house, there were random Polaroid pictures. The first one was on your dresser, the next one on the kitchen door, then one on a window sill, one at the front door, at the TV.. so many pictures. One of them showed a field full of flowers, one of them showed baby kittens, one of them showed a scene at the beach.. the last one you found, that was stuck to the mirror, had the answer to Sangdo's initial question. It was a picture of you, smiling wide, without hiding anything, the gap in your teeth was on full display. Under the picture, on another post-it-note, it read “To me, this is the most beautiful thing”.

Nakta

It was an accident, a mixture of his awkwardness, and your clumsiness, that had you laugh in embarrassment. Still a bit insecure, you his your mouth behind your long sleeves. Yooncheol couldn't do anything about it either. He found you so cute, and looked over at you with a crooked smile. He loved you so much, and it always became obvious in the way he looked at you, so much love in his eyes. He laughed at what happened, apologising. He took one of your hands away from your mouth, and you let him, even trusting him enough to take away your second hand as well. He intertwined your fingers, still smiling his cute smile. “I hope you know that I love you, no matter what you might do, or break, or what you look like.” He leaned down and kissed your forehead. “You mean so much to me. You're so beautiful, love.”

Minsung

You're his best friend, so at first he'd take offence in you hiding your mouth, just because of that gap. But of course, he'd understand to some degree that you were insecure about it. He knew what it was like to struggle with something, maybe be insecure about it. But he's overcome those things, and accepted himself for it, and he'd make it his mission to make you accept yourself for who you are, and to make you comfortable smiling around him. When you two were alone, he'd try to be funny, pulling silly faces, telling jokes, dancing funnily, anything to try and make you laugh more.

B-Jyu

He knew exactly why you hid your pretty smile, and he didn't like it at all. The next time you laughed at something, and hid your face in your hands, he'd jump on you, attacking you. Screaming out a powerful battle-cry, he'd start to tickle you all over. Luckily for him, you were very ticklish, and started laughing immediately. You tried to reach out to him to hit him, kick him, anything to get him off of him. Your mouth was now free, and Byungjoo saw that pretty face, that pretty smile, that he loved so much! He stopped soon, and leaned down to kiss you gently. He whispered into your ear, to please not hide; he confessed how much he really loved you, and your smile.

(getting ready to attack;;)

Xero

Watching him dance, you felt insecure. He was so good looking, his hair was on point, and his teeth were white, shiny, and they didn't have a gap, like yours did. After the song had ended, Jiho finally realised that you seemed sad, he smiled at you, trying to cheer you up. You weakly smiled back, not showing your teeth, as always. At this, Jiho turned on the music again, walked towards you, and grabbed your hands in his. You didn't had the chance to ask him what he thought he was doing, when he started dancing weirdly with you. Pulling your arms back and forth, leaning you down dramatically, all while singing the lyrics of the song with dorky, cheesy facial expressions. Without any possibilities of hiding it, you started smiling, before finally breaking out in laughter. Jiho was so happy to make you smile; he loved and cherished every moment that he got to see you so happy.

A-Tom

As someone who thought of himself as the most handsome member, you always felt more insecure around him. He seemingly didn't have any flaws, but he must notice all the flaws you had, right? He has to see the gap in your teeth... and obviously he'd hate it, right? But little did you know, to Sanggyun, you were more beautiful than he could ever be. He didn't tell you enough, he never did. This night, he arranged a date, leaving you a note and a new outfit. He had picked out the clothes for you, bought them. He knew you'd look dashing in anything.

When you finally arrived at the place he told you you'd meet up at, he couldn't help himself but to stare at you. Embarrassed, and thinking you didn't look good enough, you hid your face again. “Hey, no, no. Y/N.” Sanggyun walked up to you, and took your hands in his. He brought them to his mouth, and one by one, pressed little kisses to their backs. “You look so beautiful. You don't know how pretty you are, how much I love you.” He kissed your forehead. “I want to prove it to you tonight. Will you let me?”

Sangwon

Sangwon would be all pouty if you didnt smile or laugh for him, or if you hid. Hed do the same to you; he wouldnt smile any more either. Hed even go as far as to straight up ignore you sometimes. Of course this would annoy you and make you mad, but it would also show you that something was up, something bothered Yano, and this was his way of telling you that. Once youd ask him about it, hed admit the reason only shyly. He would apologise for his behaviour, but hed also tell you that having a gap in your teeth was in no way related to whether youre pretty or not - at least not to him. Hed want you to change your attitude towards yourself, and he would find a way to help you with that 

[syndianites]

Paranoia is in Bloom

Fandom: Mianite Awakening

Summary: They all thought he was overly paranoid. The voices in his head didn’t. But maybe that was why the others thought he was crazy. Honestly? He didn’t care. If he had to, he would be the one to save them when his ‘paranoia’ paid off.

AN: Uhhhh, I remember at some point someone, maybe fans?, were talking about how ironic it was that people called Andor paranoid when he seemed to have some basis behind his paranoia? Lol, i dont remember at this point, but i can make fanfics from it! Anyway, this is for your birthday, Andor, but that was like, two days ago…. Whoops XD Happy late Birthday! At this point, Merry Christmas? I hope this wasn’t too bad, and that you liked it! Also, i tried to stay on topic, but tangents. Many tangents. Also, i dont reaaaally know how much your character is based on the Prince from the Fallen Kingdom, so i kinda… picked what I wanted out of it? Like, more than i should have? Oops.

@lolfzter

He wasn’t paranoid. Despite what the others may think, he did have a reason for his actions, he wasn’t just some child learning the ways of the world. He had learned the ways of the world. Maybe not all of them, but enough.

From a young age, he learned the necessity of work, of doing things yourself. That often times you could only safely rely on yourself, could only safely trust yourself to push through. But that wasn’t to say he was taught against making friends, against making alliances. There were, afterall, strength in numbers, in allied forces. And there was something nice about having friends.

It was only a little older that he learned that naivety could kill. That blindly trusting, recklessly brushing off your initial misgivings of someone could be dangerous. There was a strange knowing in your gut, some instinctual urge that judged on more than appearance. It wasn’t like he trusted many people anyway. Doing so made it too easy to be betrayed.

He learned to fight at that age. The whisper of air that curled around his swings, the pings of metal striking metal, the hissing of an arrows smooth arc past him. It all came eerily natural to him, irked some of the people who saw him in action. It was necessary, but it was somehow freeing.

To be so clearly in his element, to know each movement he needed to make, to fill that need to move, to become thoughtless, to fight. It was almost addicting. The way his enemies fell before him, the challenges he overcame, the triumphs he experienced. Battle enthralled him, called to him.

But, he conceded much later, he could only partake in it in moderation. Societal rules dictated that such conflicts were not agreeable, and that fighting, killing, just for the sake of it was morally wrong. As much as he felt the pull of battle, the yearning to see people crumple before him, part of him knew that he shouldn’t pursue such activities. Not if he wanted to maintain a semi-normal life. Not if he wanted to be a hero.

At least, that's what the voices in his head argued. If anyone asked of them, he’d scoff, telling the person of their childishness, of their strange conversations, of the weird way they seemed to think. Of course, this would only label him as crazier than he was, so he didn’t mention them. But if someone were to take that at face value, to ignore the thought that, this man must be insane, they would find it funny how ironic it was he considered his voices to be as such.

But no one wanted to hear about his head voices, and they were too busy thinking of strange ideas to care about being noticed. It was probably for the better that they had stayed below the radar. They would not have been well received.

It had only been a few years after he learned to fight that he found an excuse to. An excuse, and a real reason. Vengeance was, afterall, one of the more acceptable terms for battle. And it was what drove him forward, what set him before a being of inhuman strength and power.

Despite the more dedicated, perhaps even righteous, nature of his desire to fight he found himself slipping into another thought. The challenge this being gave him, the pure struggle that he could feel in his bones, that shook his core with each strike, that nearly blinded him with each clash, it sang to him. His voices had been rendered silent, whether awed or concerned, and the silence was peculiar. But it was the most silence his head had felt in such a long time. Though he had come to care for his voices, he found himself treasuring the silence.

Sharpened diamond pinged against sharpened diamond, a sound much different from metal, and for the first time in a long time, the sounds of battle were all that filled his head. Muted popping came from below as he was forced dangerously closer to the lava boiling below, yet the heat came as a comfort. His muscles burned with the same intensity, yet he relished the strain. Two pairs of eye connected, before lava blazed between them, and a ghastly cry was heard.

Getting some distance away from the otherworldly entity, a smirk, more of a smiling grimace, graced his mildly burnt complection. This was a fight he was determined to win, but the mere experience of it was exhilarating. To be nearly on par with some wretched creature of human likeness? It buffed his ego, but also called out to his inner warrior. Another enemy to trump, another person to best. He wanted to finish him, but not finish the fight. For once, his mind felt clear, felt in complete working order. As if fighting was what he was made to do.

But that too, ended. He won, rode off into the sunset like some cliche hero. Except it was more of a sunrise. The dawn of something new. Perhaps the yearning for battle had been quelled then. Maybe the lust for conflict found it's release. For a while after that, he was nearly content with the peace that held over his town of sorts.

Except… an urge in the back of his head was growing. His voices were anxious. Something wasn’t quite right. Someone wasn’t quite right. Though his gut told him to be wary, he brushed the thought aside. This was his home, his domain. Surely no one would be foolish enough to encroach upon it.

Well, he had been wrong. Wrong to assume it was safe. Wrong to deny the feeling he had. And now people he suffered for it. His voices didn’t accused him. They almost berated themselves, for not convincing him. But they knew, as he knew, that none of that mattered. That they could only push forward to rectify this. Afterall, what point is there on dwelling in the past?

Each fight pulled at him more. Like there was something he was… missing. Not anything tangible, but something he should know. But he didn’t. And there was something else going wrong behind him, behind the scenes. There was something getting ready to strike him, to rear its ugly head. No one else thought so. They could only see the end of this struggle coming out. It seemed to be in their favor, but something was getting close to breaking it. But they just didn’t see that.

And then it was too late. It struck while his back was turned. Literally. There was some great force, something seizing his muscles, strangling his cry, rendering him useless. Useless. And he lay there, motionless, confused, angry. And his world became enveloped in black.

That too, had been a while ago. That had been his first plunge into the void. Into nothingness. It It had been his first time meeting the strange person he knew now as Taylor, who couldn’t get rid of the flowers on her skin. (He didn’t think she wanted to anyway).

Back then was when he met his now closest friends, found that fighting was okay, that killing wasn't permanent. He had so many new experiences, was introduced to the cryptic priest he didn’t know he’d hurt to see die, helped revive the broken man he knew was going to die but pained over anyway.

So many new people, different rules, strange customs. Who needed a god? Apparently mortals. But he wasn’t going to conform to some pretentious sounding gods, and he wasn’t going to fold under the pressure of some weird old man.

And he didn’t. And he still wouldn’t. Back then his gut said to be wary of Birdy. It was right. Later, it said to be wary of the shadows. So far, he wasn’t sure if he was right. He wasn’t wrong.

Now. Now his gut said not to trust what he was told. Something in his head pulled at him. He refused to remain naive. And when Spector showed up, strange and crazy, he was going to listen to that pull. But he wasn’t going to let it drive him.

Much later, when he, along with the others, were left reeling, scurrying through the end, wondering what Hector really meant to Dal, he felt the pull. His voices muttered about, speaking of Dallas, of Spector, or was it just Hector at this point? They spoke hushedly about why she chose to stay with Spector.

But that wasn’t the real pull.

No. His head warned him of something else. It wasn’t something he could fight, or anyone could fight. There was no harm, well, physically harm he could see coming. Just like Sky, this was something fought within someone’s own mind. But not his. Hers. When it really came down to it, he wondered.

What would Spector do to Dallas?

(AN: Yeah, at some point i switched tense, on accident, and then it went back, but then it switched again. So. Well. Whoops. Supposed to be all past tense in the beginning. I think. And kinda present at the end? I should go back and edit, but its getting closer to one in the morning than i should get to, and tbh it prolly wouldnt help. Anyway, Happy (late) Birthday again Andor! I know at this point its Christmas, but ya know..... )