#he was soooo boring and was like ''just make a spotify playlist'' so you hate fun AND you hate lesbians

[desire-mona]

so what happens now like im president right

[ultraphobic]

Hiya Lane! Another day - another message from Santa! 🎅🏻

Today is a bit of a sad day for Hanoi Rocks fans, but I love watching All Those Wasted Years (Live at Marquee) concert, it lifts my spirits. Maybe you also have a favorite Hanoi Rocks performance? Today I started with a sad damn thing. It turns out to be some kind of depressive Santa lmao

Omg!! The glam festival is wonderful! Which groups are already known?

It sounds pretty funny about national holidays! The King and two birthdays hehe

Oh, I'm sorry that your work week was quite busy :( If it's not a secret, who do you work for? I work in a vinyl store and sometimes it can be too boring lol

Wow!! What's your cat's name?

And I'm sorry for your loss ❤️��🩹

Wow, this is an amazing top album! Ultraphobic, in my opinion, is very underrated. Your playlist is very cool and diverse! I like it!

🎄 Do you have a favorite hobby?

🎄 Where would you like to travel and why?

🎄 Your favorite time of the year and association with it?

Your Santa ⛄️ 🎄

hey santa!

i was a little confused on the hanoi rocks thing until i remembered time zones & it's probably still the 8th wherever you are! i haven't watched any live performances of theirs, i can't seem to do that for any groups i like for some reason? theres one single faster pussycat live cover i listened to from last years glamfest in my country that i listened to, but only because it was an inxs song that i really connect with

i do have some favourite hanoi songs though: don't follow me, a million miles away, cutting corners, & underwater world to name a few

the few artists they have already announced for glamfest are jetboy, janet gardner, the cruel intentions (all international), and ablaze, sisters doll (local acts). i'm hoping for michael monroe as he is in japan the week before which would make travel easy and would line up with the hints we've been given! i'm also hoping for firehouse and also a newer aussie band called southern river band who i actually saw earlier this year, they're awesome!

i can't say the company i work for just for online safety reasons but i work as a piercer! i'm still training so i am an apprentice but it's super fun!! it's so cool you work in a record store tho i feel like that's something i could see myself doing in an alternate reality

my cat's name is bandit!

thank you! i do pride myself on my spotify & my music taste and i have probably over 200 playlists at this point just from getting random ideas for silly little playlists that i think huh that would be fun (and then i end up having three songs and abandon)

ultraphobic is soooo underrated and i am SO upset that it (+belly to belly) isn't available at all to stream in my country! i'm even blocked from listening on youtube! i had to buy copies on cd (from overseas mind you, they only sell the first three albums and then the best of compilation here) and download the files from there and add them as local files so i could listen with the rest of my stuff.

okok question time i love this part

i have a few hobbies; i've recently been doing a few art classes and discovered i'm kinda ok at drawing so that's fun! i also do a bit of photoshop and make stupid t shirts n stuff (those were my christmas gifts to everyone last year)

i'd like to travel more within my own country as i've only been to one other state, and one territory, i'd also like to visit some of my online friends in the us & canada! and also just europe in general for touristy stuff

i used to say i hate summer and to a degree i kiiinda still do? like i don't like australian summer weather and the heat BUT i kinda have to let up on that and realise that i end up being the happiest at this time of the year and somehow all my stress happens around the middle of the year (and my birthday and christmas both happen in summer so....)

nice to hear from you!!!

[diabeticsugarpop]

Teenage Drama (Kuroo x Reader) 1

KEY: (Y/N) – your first name (Y/T) – the town you used to live (Y/H) – your height

________________________________

Preparations

 You wake up to the sound of your phone vibrating. You move your hand towards the noise, accidentally pushing your phone of the bed. A weak growl escapes your mouth as you push yourself up to grab the device. As soon as you pick it up the vibration stops, notifying you that the caller gave up trying to reach you.

 -- 3 missed calls from Nami-Chan –

 Nami is someone you consider your bestie. But you wonder what may be so urgent that she keeps calling you. You unlock your phone and realize its already 2 pm. Yesterday was a busy day since you spent the whole day and night arranging your new apartment.

 You moved to Tokyo alone. Your parents stayed in (Y/T) to keep the family business going but you did not want that life for you. So, you decided to try your luck in a more populated and modern city like Tokyo. Since your best friend already lived here you decided to attend the same school as well. Her parents divorced when you two were kids and she moved to Tokyo with her dad. You haven’t seen her a lot over the years, but your friendship was strong enough to survive the distance.

 Now you’re 17, (Y/H) cm tall and ready to start that wild teenage life which every series on Netflix propagated. You wonder what your new life would be like. Will you be tangled up in a love triangle or in a scandalous affair with you teacher!? Will any guy even notice you at all because honestly at this point you’re just desperate to gain some experience. You never had a boyfriend and the first and only time you kissed a guy was in middle school.  And that’s only because he made a challenge of how many girls he can kiss in one day.

 You’re tired of kissing and cuddling guys in your imagination. You want the real deal. If that means you must become a thot, so shall it be. This new School year you will definitely get laid. Or at least have a guy actually be interested in you and talk to you for more than just a week… Also, you’re very determined to get them straight A’s as well since you care a lot for your education.

 While you’re lost in thoughts your phone starts to vibrate again. You completely forgot that Nami tried to call you. “What’s up?”, you pick up the call. “Ahhhh~! (Y/N)-Chan! I’ve been trying to reach you the whole day!” Her voice squeaks loudly in your ear. “Sorry~ I was still sleeping.” You try to calm her, “Did something happened?” She gasped and took a deep breath. “What do you mean what happened! Did you already forgot what we planned for the day!? I’m working my ass of and you forgot- Hgnn!” you put the phone a few centimeters away from your ear to prevent yourself from going deaf. What is she so worked up about? You try to remember but- OH! Right! She planned a welcome party for you tonight and you agreed to meet up at 1 pm to shop some new outfits. “I’m so sorry I’ll be there in a minute!” you apologize while running to the bathroom to get your toothbrush. “You better be! I’m standing here like an idiot for a whole hour now!” you can imagine her pout. “Calm down.. Like you didn’t come late anyway.” Knowing your friend, she probably arrived 30 minutes later than planned. You could hear her gasp for getting caught and hung up the phone. In about 5 minutes you were ready to leave.

 It felt good seeing Nami after a long period of time. Your friendship always felt genuine and real, something you couldn’t say about all of your friendships. She is a bit taller than you and had that mean girl look. Blonde hair, sometimes with strands of random colors, blue eyes and a pretty face. Her personality fit the mean girl stereotype too. She was very popular and knew her way with words. You probably wouldn’t be friends with her if you haven’t known each other since childhood. Sometimes you wish you had her confidence but that doesn’t mean that you’re much of a bore. You’re a little introverted and like being on your own sometimes. But you can be fun too!

 You two enter the mall and head to Nami’s favorite clothing brand. If you want to get some guys attention tonight then you will need a provoking outfit! The party is going to take place at her house since her father doesn’t really mind and rather chills with his homeboys. It is for sure that a lot of people from your new school will attend the party. And Nami knows that your body count is on cero, so she made sure to invite the “hot stuff” as she calls them.  

 “Ohh~ Hello there baby girl!” Nami spits out as you walk out the changing room. You’re wearing a pretty heavily cropped top and some ripped jeans. You don’t feel confident and go back to trying on some other options.

 After a few hours of trying out some stuff and messing around you two head up to the second floor of the mall to drink some milkshakes. It was a hot day after all. You ended up choosing a plain black skirt, just short enough to not feel exposed, and a cropped black shoulder free top. You felt cute, not gonna lie. Nami went for something flashier and chose a pair of skinny black jeans and a white bralette.

 Once you finished your milkshakes and that catching-up-on-life conversation you two took a taxi to her house. She wanted to prepare you for tonight and do your hair and makeup. During your beaty touch ups you two talked some more. “There’re going to be so many people, like, don’t you even worry.” She says while grabbing the curling iron. “That actually makes me worry.” You respond while holding your breath because this bitch ‘bout to burn your freaking scalp. She did not go easy on you. “Aw come on. I only invited the chill ones. Like. You know there’s this girl called Mei, she totally begged me to come today. And I was like bish nah what the hell. Can’t fucking stand her.” Nami nagged as usual. “Why, what she do?” you ask, ready to talk some shit. “Okay like. Boy. There’s this guy called Haru and he broke up with her, but we’re on his side soooo.” “That’s... kinda a shitty reason to hate someone.” You call her out. She lightly pulls your hair in response.

 2 Hours later you two were all dolled up. You admire her makeup skills. She put some accents on your pretty features and made them POP. But she could’ve went down a touch on the highlighter tho. It was almost time for the party to start. Since it’s Saturday and you don’t have to go anywhere tomorrow you two had a couple of drinks. This is supposed to be a cool kids party after all. The house was all decorated, Spotify connected to the speakers and snacks and drinks served on the table in the living room. Nami turned the speakers louder and picked a random party hits playlist. It was now time for the first guest to arrive and god were you nervous.

[itshollandsgirl]

MORP? (Colby Brock Imagine)

Requested by anon

"Never have I ever been to prom." I said to everyone.

"You're joking?" Corey said.

"Wait what? You've never been to prom?" Sam said.

"Yeah I've never been to prom." I said shrugging.

"Why? Aaron asked.

"No one asked me, all my friends had dates except me and I didn't feel like being a third wheel to anyone. So I had no interest in going." I explained.

"Well if we were in school together, I definitely would've taken you." Colby said laying his hand on my thigh giving it a tight squeeze.

"Thanks Colby, but it's whatever really." I said.

"No, not whatever. I refuse to let you go on with life without having a prom experience." Corey said.

"What do you want me to do? Sneak into a high school prom?" I joked.

Corey gave Colby a look in which he returned and I gave the camera a look. We were currently filming a "Never Have I Ever" video for Colby's channel. I don't know why everyone was making a big deal about me not going to prom. They know I'm not a party person.

"But seriously babe, why didn't you go to prom?" Colby asked.

"I'm serious, it's because I didn't have a date." I said.

We were currently in his room, he was editing and I was on the bed.

"What about going just to party and have fun?"

"I'm not a party person, you know that."

"I remember prom, I asked this girl in this cute way-"

"Yes I know Colby, I was already following you on social media. You had a whole vine for it and you featured her in one of your YouTube videos."

"Stalker much?" He joked.

"Show off much?" I retaliated.

"Jealous much?"

"Shut up." I rolled my eyes. "But hey I gotta go, I have work."

"Do you have to leave?" Colby asked wrapping his arms around me.

"Yes I do, it's how I pay for my apartment." I said.

He sighed and kissed me before saying, "Fiiiiiiiine, what time do you get off? Maybe we can do something." He offered.

"I get off at 10, I can come back to here and we can watch movies and cuddle."

"Oooo, sounds like a plan." Colby said. "No get goin before you're late. Love you."

"Love you too." I said giving him a quick kiss and leaving.

Colby's POV

"So you're gonna make her a prom?" Corey asked me.

"Yeah, that's the plan at least. Even though she says she doesn't care about not going to prom, I have a feeling she does because she mentioned my promposal from high school and there was a hint of jealousy in her voice. Also she got sassy with me." I explained.

"So how are you gonna pull this off? Doesn't she need a dress and make up and stuff?" Elton asked.

"I can do her make up and hair." Devyn piped in.

"I'm sure Kat has a dress she can borrow." Sam added.

"Where are you gonna have this said prom?" Elton asked.

"Backyard, its big enough. Besides it's something small just us, simple but effective." I said.

"So you want all of us to dress up too?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah, have our own little prom in the backyard. We can hang up some fairy lights, she loves those. Have a little snack table and some music. It's perfect." I said.

"But we can't forget the most important part of prom." Sam inclined. "The promposal."

"Dude you're right, I almost forgot about that." I said. "How should I ask her?"

"Something rememberable obviously. Also something that's meaningful to both of you." Aaron said.

"Hmmm…"

Your POV

Ugh what a boring day at work. I really hate people sometimes, like honestly. Humans are assholes. At least now I can cuddle with my loving boyfriend to rest my nerves. Pulling up to the Trap House, I park my car next to Sam's and head to the front door. Texting Colby that I'm here I waited patiently in the cold for the door to open. About a minute after my text the door unlocks and Colby opens the door filming and giving me a cute smile

"Hey baby." I smiled.

"Hey beautiful, you hungry?" He asked.

"Um yeah, I could eat. What you want?" I asked.

"I could go for anything really. You pick." He said.

"Well Tender Greens just closed, we could get Chipotle." I suggested.

"You can't eat there though." He said.

"I know, I meant for you. And then I could get something else."

"No no, we're eating together. What about McDonalds, fast and simple."

"Yeah okay, I've been craving fries for days now." I said clapping and heading to his car.

The drive started off silent, I was on my phone with my feet up on his dash. His hand on my thigh and then holding my hand.

"Hey, I made a new playlist for you. Why don't you play it." Colby said.

"Awe you did, thanks baby. Get you mans who makes playlist for you." I said to the camera and unlocking his phone.

Opening up Spotify I find the new playlist with the name For My Beautiful Girl. Colby looked at me with a big smile and then back to the road.

"Cute title, handsome." I said smiling at him.

"Do you like the songs?" He asked.

I hit play and the first song was one of my favourites: Welcome To the Black Parade by MCR 

“Well the first song is a classic so far I love it.” I said giggling. “We’re emo guys if you can’t tell.” I said to the camera.

“Take a look at the other songs.” Colby pushed on.

Confused on why he’s very persistent on this playlist I looked at the other songs

Welcome to the Black Parade I Miss You  Love Me Lane Boy You’re the One Over and Out Umbrella Guns for Hands Oh, Calamity! This is Gospel One Dance Perfect Rebel Love Song Outer Space Move Along Walk On Water I Feel Like Dancing Truce Homecoming King Money Empty Gold

“Yeah I love it, they’re songs from my playlist.” I said.

“Baby, look at it. Like really look at it.” Colby said giving me a weird look.

“What’s going on Colby, I don’t get it.” 

“Look at the first letter of each song.” 

Looking at it again I did what I was told, “W..I..L...L..You go to prom with me.”

Wait what? Will you go to prom with me?

“So will you?” Colby asked

“Prom? What prom?”

“Since you didn’t go to your prom, I want to give you one and this time you will have a date, me.” Colby said giving me a sheepish smile.

We were already in the McDonald’s parking lot so I jumped from my seat onto Colby giving him a kiss and hug, also accidentally pushing against the horn with my butt.

“You’re the sweetest boyfriend to ever walk into my life and I don’t know what I would do without you.” I said.

“So I take it as a yes?” Colby said smiling.

“A big yes.” I smiled giving him another kiss.

After a moment, he breaks from our kiss and grabs his dropped camera off the floor.

“She said yes! We’re going to prom!” Colby yelled.

“Yay! And I have to give you props for your promposal, that’s very creative of you.” I said kissing his cheek.

“Well I know it had to be special but also something that’s relatable to us and what is more relatable to us than bands?” 

“That’s very true, also a dash of Rihanna.”

“Yes and a dash of Rihanna.” 

Today’s the day, “prom” with the Trap House. Devyn, Kat, Amanda, and I decided to get our make up and hair done because they wanted me to have the whole prom experience. Kat let me borrow one of her fancy dresses because I didn’t want to spend money on a dress I’ll only use once, which they could understand. While we were out, the boys were setting the backyard up. I’m excited to see what they’ve done not gonna lie. 

Brennen was acting as dad and DJ tonight. We’re standing in front of the house taking prom photos and I couldn’t help but get watery eyed. They did this all for me, these are truly the best friends a girl could ever ask for. Colby went out of his way to do this all for me, if I could sat I do right now, I would. He was dressed so handsomely, I’ve never seen him wear a tux and now that I do..god I think I’m dating James Bond.

“Now I want her home by 11, Colby. Not 11:01 or 11:15, 11 on the dot!” Brennen joked pretending to be my dad.

“Yes, I will try to have her back by 11.” Colby laughed.

“Not try, will.”

“Okay dad you can stop now, we have a party to go to.” I giggled. 

“Now, you go in there and have a good time honey. If he tries anything you call me so I can beat his ass.” Brennen said.

“Yup, I sure will.” I rolled my eyes smiling.

Colby took my hand and we walked to the backyard which was decorated beautifully. Fairly lights hung above us. Floating lights in the pool. The snack table will looking good too, damn they even got a chocolate fountain.

“Colby, you did all this for me?” I said looking up at him.

“Of course, I want you to have the best prom, one that you will remember forever.” He said.

He held my chin with his fingers and leaned down to press a soft and sweet kiss on my lips. 

“I love you, with all my heart.” I said.

“And I love you with my whole heart, mind, and body. Now come on, let’s dance!” 

The night was filled with laughs, music, and memories. We even did a prom king and queen, obviously it was Colby and I. Brennen played us a slow song to dance too and everyone joined in later. The dogs were having a blast too, it was cute. Aaron slow danced with Buddy, which we thought was cute. And because he was the only one without a date, each of us girls got dance with him leaving our boyfriends to the side. Instead of a Photo Booth, we had three polaroids and props; a lot of photos were taken. The chocolate fountain had to be one of the best parts, it was soooo goooood. And at the end of the night we took one final photo, we all jumped into the pool. This defiantly was a night I will remember forever.

(A/N: Hope you liked this!)

[park-j1m1n-bts]

Top 50 - 11 Songs of 2017

Ok so I did this last year and I really enjoyed doing it and looking back this year at all the songs I listened to in the past! So here goes :)

As always, I love my boy groups/male singers so just a little disclaimer because this list will definitely show that trend! 

50. EXO - DIAMOND 

This is such an interesting song and the chorus really caught me off guard (in a good way) deffo one of my faves from the boys’ new album.

49. RED VELVET - RED FLAVOR

This song really surprised me! I'm not someone who enjoys ‘cute’ songs and when I first heard this I didn't like it but my god it is so catchy!! I found myself humming along to it aaaalll the time. Therefore I had to add it to this list. 

48. BRAVE GIRLS - ROLLIN

I love brave girls, they are so sexy yet so fresh at the same time! I loved this song straightaway and the dance with the stools is so different but it is just great!

47. SEVENTEEN (PERFORMANCE UNIT) - LILILI YABBAY

I liiiive for the performance unit! (Dino is my bias sooo ;) ) The bridge of this song is brilliant, the higher pitch of it is such a contrast to the rest of the song, I just can’t get enough of it!!!

46. VICTON - EYEZ EYEZ

Although it still had an element of cuteness, this darker concept was so unexpected of the Victon boys! It really suited them!

45. HENRY - I’ M GOOD

This is such a chill summer vibe song!! Added to my driving playlist straightaway!

44. JONGHYUN (FEAT TAEYEON) - LONELY

What a beautifully talented and kind man, may he now rest in peace. This song was breath taking and his vocals as well as taeyeon’s are truly magical and I hope this song gets even more recognition!

43. NCT 127 - GOOD THING

What a tune!!!! I'm surprised this song is only number 43 because I had this on repeat all day when the album was released! You just can’t help but move to it!

42. MYTEEN - AMAZING

I think this song is a bit of a love/hate song - I love it! Myteen are a rookie boy group and this is their debut song and I have heard a lot of negative comments about it but the bridge and the chorus are so flipping catchy, you’ll deffo be singing it after hearing it!

41. G-DRAGON - UNTITLED 2014

Woah I did not expect this from G-Dragon! I’ll be honest, personally I'm not a massive fan of g-dragon’s rapping style but his voice!!?? damn it gave me chills! This is a super beautiful song.

40. TAEYANG - WAKE ME UP 

I love love love taeyang’s voice and paired with this song.... just wow. I think it was produced really well, how the first verse was very stripped back but then at the chorus the clap of the beat came in. It just really made his voice stand out 

39. IN2IT - AMAZING

Such a summer song with a very addictive tune “u-who who u- who who” ahhh so cute I love it 

38. SUNMI - GASHINA

Yaaasss slay girl! such an empowering song and I love the mix between cute and fierce 

37. HALO - HERE I AM

Halo are super underrated! I can’t understand why though because this song is super catchy! Please check them out, you won't regret it!

36. WANNA ONE - BURN IT UP 

This song is freaking amazing! especially Woojin’s breakdown at the end of the song! His voice is so deep I love it��

35. CLC - HOBGOBLIN

This concept was brilliant!! I couldn’t believe it was CLC but those girls pulled it off so well! what a great comeback

34. B.I.G. - 123

Another really underrated boy group! This is such an upbeat and happy song! super duper catchy!!!

33. JBJ - FANTASY

I love this song so much! I really wanted to put it higher but there was just too many good songs last year! The first line just grabs you “you’re not a daydreamer” looooove!!

32. SEVENTEEN (VOCAL UNIT) - HABIT

Pure talent! solo, each boy is amazing but when they sing together for the chorus.... woah just gives me shivers!

31. UNIT BLACK - STEAL YOUR HEART

I never follow these sort of survival shows however listening to this song I became hooked, especially on Park Doha ....but where did he go? like most of the members of unit black went into In2it but not Doha?? anyway this song aaaahhh its great!!! needs way more recognition

30. THE ROSE - SORRY

woah. This band has become my new favourite (sorry cnblue I still love you) As a debut song, Sorry was amazing! their talent is no joke

29. STRAY KIDS - HELLEVATOR

2017 was clearly the year for boy groups! so many debuted and 80% of them I swear made it to my top 50 its just amazing! I love becoming obsessed with new groups! this song blew up when it came out, everyone was just so shocked that the boys produced the song and choreo themselves! 

28. B.A.P. - WAKE ME UP

I love when B.A.P do this darker concept, I think it really suits them! The message it portrays is really important and this with the great song made it a great comeback for the boys.

27. UP10TION - GOING CRAZY

Now i’ll be honest Up10tion songs can be hit or miss with me so when they came back with this song I was sceptical but my god I LOVE it soooo much! the contrast between the high voices of the singers and the deep voices of the rappers is really great

26. MICRODOT (FEAT. SANCHEZ) - NEW DAY

I only discovered microdot recently whilst on Spotify and I instantly downloaded his whole album! it was really difficult not to put like every song on here! This one I love because I really like when songs have a softer chorus but then rap verses. 

25. HOTSHOT - JELLY

Hotshot ma boyyyysss! I cant explain just how long I waited for this comeback! and they did not disappoint! It was a shame Sungwoon wasn't involved but he is doing great in wanna one so congrats to him :)

24. MICRODOT (FEAT DONELL LEWIS) - YOU NEED LOVE

I only put in two songs from the album so I think I did well! I don’t know if this is cheating though because this song is in English but I just had to add it!! it brings such a cool vibe

23. EXO - POWER 

Honestly it took me a while to get into this song.... but the more I heard it the more the tune got stuck in my head! I love the beat and the performance is soo great

22. BLOCK B - SHALL WE DANCE

I love Block B’s vibes! They never go suit and follow other groups concepts and I think that's great! this song is a prime example, its just so different and distinguishable. I can’t help but dance alone to it 

21. CNBLUE - BETWEEN US 

What a brilliant song!! correct me if I'm wrong but I don't think they had a win with this song? .... whaaaaat?!? I don’t understand! they need more recognition

20. SF9 - EASY LOVE 

My favourite sf9 song!!! I love it when the rappers come in each time, the beat just changes! waaaa its just great

19. KARD - RUMOR

Deffo my fave kard song by farrrrr! J.Seph shook the world when he started singing! my boy DID THAT!! such a feel good summer song! 

18. BTS -DNA

yes, I know what you’re thinking “has an Army really just put BTS’s comeback song 18th on her list” but trust me guys I tried really hard to do this list objectively and not just put BTS’s whole album right at the top. Don't get me wrong though DNA was AMAZING I remember hearing it for the first time and I ran around my uni flat screaming and getting everyone to come listen to this BOP. They smash it every time.

17.. SEO IN GUK - BETTER TOGETHER 

I love this mans voice! All his songs just grab me, you can’t help but just sway to this beautiful song!!! please please listen to it!!!! 

16. BTS - BEST OF ME 

When my baby came in straight away with his beautiful voice I legit fell of my chair! I love how this song starts of so calm and this the well known sound of the chain smokers comes in and then..... suga singing like tf!? yessss come thruuuu with the vocals ugh I love him.

15. PENTAGON - LIKE THIS 

I’ve been seriously loving Pentagon recently! and I really wanted to put this song higher on my list but as you will see later on wayyyy tooo many good songs I just couldn’t. Their vocals (and visuals *cough*) are no joke! please stan them

14. MONSTA X - SHINE FOREVER 

Sooo hard not to put all their songs on here! 2017 was their year!! so many good songs, they are always so catchy and just wake me up

13. BTS - GO GO 

What a fun song oh my god! only BTS could make the performance of Go Go cool! I love how much fun they seem to have singing this song.

12. IKON - BLING BLING

Now, real talk! if this song does not hype you up and get you moving then there is something seriously wrong with you! I listen to this to help me get up in the morning, when I'm exercising or whenever I feeling blughhhh. only ikon could pull of this concept

11. BTS - NOT TODAY

I don't think I will ever get bored of this song! everything about I just love and I'm am kinda sad it just missed my top 10 but like I said I didn't want my top 10 to be boring and for BTS to dominate the whole list! nevertheless a brilliant brilliant song

so there is my top kpop songs 50 though to 11. I will do my top 10 in a separate post because otherwise it will be way too long and boring! I hope you guys enjoy and check out any you haven't listened to... you wont regret it 

[jjmarieantoinette-blog]

14/3

Physically exhausting, mentally definitely not stable day to sum up but I am going to skip the good parts I felt happy and greater than most of the days today to be honest but now I am alone sitting in my bed, lights off lavender candle on, it’s 23.27 pm and I am drowning in my thoughts again.

I started thinking about what real love is a lot lately. And I am always coming up to the point that I decide, if you care about one’s happiness as much as yours and truly most of the time even more, that’s love. I love mom, dad well that’s obvious but that made me realize one more thing I love him. I mean I L O V E him. This is not the easiest words for someone like me as I am so arrogant and selfish most of the time but yes. 

At the very beginning, there was this guy who I met exactly one year ago. Well, I of course knew him thanks to instagram but we actually talked that day-I do not exactly remember as I was drunk but that was what I told- So, the med day has also a different importance for me as I met my first -and I really hope to be the last- love. I totally remember waking up at 15th and he replied to one of the stupid stories I posted like ‘God why am I there’ I was like ‘Seriously what is he doing there’ and don’t remember my exact reply but I definitely didn’t think things were going to end up like this. I guess that’s the miracle of life lol.

About 2(?) months later, I -again- remember my exact feelings. I felt alone literally all the time, and seriously thought that I will never ever have real feelings for someone and I am always getting sick and tired and I will never settle on and have a nice life with the guy I love and be happy. Yeah those stuff were soooo far away from me and I always thought that I can spend my time now like that but I’ll never truly be happy. Anyway when I felt like that I always had the exact same routine. Binge eating, purging, crying to the bones of myself, facewash, cry again A LOT, calm down, listen to some Chopin optionally op9.2, and read Little Prince in French as I was taking the course. Oh my God little prince thank you for not only being the best book ever but somehow you made me meet him. I posted some French quotes. I remember it being about how you can not see the true love with eyes but only with heart. (So cute isn’t it?) And he wrote something and I was like ‘Wow so you know to speak French’ and the answer was typical him thinking about it now ‘well, nope’

The night you get to know each other, can not sleep because the conversation is going so well and you are having nice time thinking seriously how he is like that?. Yes, today marking almost 10 months inside the relationship, I truly can say that that was one of our best talks. You weren’t icecold as I though. Who can say that typical instagram dm flirting would make us come along all this path?

First date, you drinking black coffee, me thinking you’re hot. I was able to talk for hours without checking my phone. 

2nd, starbucks, deciding seeing Avengers, me destroying my car fuck me.

Eymir, bike riding, me taking your photos, you talking about your life and getting scared of a fucking tiny water snail thing lol.

Beytepe, sitting on bare grass, I love how you made me listen your spotify playlists and we just sat there. first kiss, heartbeats super fast. We also made out for a couple of times in the car there i guess lol. I was always like ‘he is good at this’ but ‘nope we are not in a relationship nope’

ODTU, you going back to 34, not boyfriend yet, sitting on grass, thinking how cute you are.

Beytepe, stadium at night, listening to music, talking about religions and life and death and some serious stuff. I didn’t agree with you all the time but seriously that day I was amazed how you explained yourself. Lying on the grass on your knees, looking at the stars. (We did a LOT of sitting on the grass thing)

Beytepe, yeah again, playing volleyball, you sucking at it, you rolling some stupid round things, me thinking ‘Fuck, I am faling in love fuckfuckfuck’

Your house, us, for the first time. So much pain, definitely worth it, we belonging to each other. And confession: that day deep down I hoped that you’ll be the only person I do this with.

IKEA trip, your new house plant fantasy.

Your house, fighting, me crying and thinking if it is possible to hate and love someone that much at the fucking same time.

Library times together, fuck med school seriously I hate what it does to us.

Beytepe, having our first son but he is a frog and he definitely is not cute but at least he is with us. I was sad when I left him. one of the best memories. That day I thought how I love watching you laughing.

Phone calls, me opening up to you about my bulimia thing. That topic is kinda hard to talk so I am skipping it.

Meeting your mom, omg still can’t believe as it really is a big deal to me. I always wanted to ask if I was the 1st person for you doing this. 

My house, making letter, penis and vagina cookies. Heaven in my mouth.

Coffee fest, I love watching you when you are doing something you actually like.

The time I got a fever, at your house, you doing weird stuff to me with towels. I love you and thank you for that I had shower like 4 times in 2 days.

TOBB, me getting iron supplement thing, I was SO mad at you those days and it took a long time to get over but I am feeling good now anyway you were with me and we took stupid selfies.

Late night Anıtkabir, all I can remember was how sick and cold I was urgh, skipping.

Us getting drunk together oMG that’s one of the funniest nights, you were SO stupid I have no idea how I drove and got back to home that day omg and we had some great drunk sex lol.

-I’m skipping loads of school and your (tbh I’d prefer calling it our) home memories bc they are sooooo much-

Christmas shopping, wearing Santa hat and stupid but cosy sweaters, me thinking how excited I am to be with you on a new year.

You coming to pick me for a coffee at 1st Jan, AND YOU RAN AWAY WHEN YOU SEE DOGS. That’s enough for that day.

oOOOH, ice skating and you sucking at it.

And, bowling and you TRULY sucking at it.

God I can’t continue this because I seriously am crying as I am so extra emotional from the doctor stress and we not being able to talk and hug and spend time a lot lately. I don’t know if I am not strong enough to survive depressions but I do know that I hate being alone. By being alone, I don’t mean other temporary people. I mean being without you. (You can not believe the amount of tears coming out of my eyes right now.)

But the fact is even when we can’t see each other a lot, or talk, deep down I am always aware of you loving me-me loving you. We had to go through hard times with fighting all the time with all the crying and screaming and I cannot guarantee that that will never happen again. But I can say that I will be loving you so much when we fight. I care about you, I do not want to let go, I want to have all those amazing feelings that I wrote about all my life. I don’t want some ‘Yeah I’m getting bored and life will change for both of us so let’s split up’ kind of relationship. That’s it. Not the perfect version because of the life conditions but I am living a dream with you. I am not sure if you can see the amount of hard work I put in us and maybe I am not seeing what you all did for us. 

I just am sure that I love you. That scares me some days because I feel it to my bones sometimes. Sometimes a thing you do breaks my heart so much I cry for hours. Or when I can’t focus on what I do when we argue. Those stuff really scare me. I am scared of the things I would do not to lose you. Having feelings is bad those times.

But most of the times, you, not doing anything, just existing at the same location with me makes me smile. You hugging me makes me smile. You saying that you love me makes me happiest person alive. The dreams of future including you excites me so much. I just can not wait to spend more time with you. Happy meeting anniversary if this is a thing. 

-yeah so I am saying it without doubts-

‘Queen-Love of my life’

[weliveourdream]

Hola everyone.

As you already know me so well, you know that I love going to concert. It’s like food or the air I breathe, I need concerts to survive. I mean, how boring would life be without live music? Oh my god, I can’t even imagine. So dull.

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So, in order to not let my life become some kind of boring or dull, I just had to visit another concert and thankfully Nothing But Thieves, one of my favorite bands, decided to pay us a visit. And holy moly, it was soooo amazing. I don’t even know where to begin, no joke.

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But first let me tell you something about the band. I first got in touch with them about two years ago while dreaming about flying to the UK to attend Reading Festival – which my mum and I then also did, as you all know. I remember falling more and more in love with their music and their style and just the band overall. And when I finally saw them at Reading, I was head over heels in love with them. Especially with Conor, the lead singer. He’s literally the cutest ever and was so emotional at the show at Reading. So when they announced their European tour, I just had to see them again.

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I am indeed a really really big fan of their music. They somehow sound like nothing I’ve ever heard before. And Conor’s voice is so damn unique, it’s fascinating. And they sound so damn good live, oh my god. I would say that they perfectly fit into my lane of music I love. They are a little bit poppy, a little bit slow, very emotional and deep when it comes to the lyrics and then suddenly they get all loud and heavy and full of amazing beats and guitar riffs. And all of that topped with Conor’s angelic voice. It’s literally everything I could wish for. So yeah, that special mix is really what got to me.

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And exactly a week it was finally time to see them live. Crazy that it was only just a week ago, feels like it was ages ago. But anyway. The concert was in a pretty small venue in Vienna and completely sold out (props to them). I actually love the venue, as it had stairs in the back so I didn’t have any problems with the sight. I hate when there are only tall people in front of me, I mean, I’m not the smallest person ever, but especially at concerts platforms come in pretty handy for me. And my mum was happy about that too. So thankfully we didn’t have to worry about not seeing anything.

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So we got in and that first support act was already playing – a band called Airways, which  I funnily already knew beforehand, as one of their songs (it’s called “Mate”) is part of Spotify playlist. So it was no surprise for me that they were amazing. And then the second band came – called The Xcerts – and they were just as amazing as the first one. I really have to applaud NBT for picking such good support acts. They really were a perfect pick. And also the music they played before NBT finally got on stage. Two Door Cinema Club, Foals, The Killers – all the big hits to get us all hyped up. And it worked, I really have to admit.

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And yeah, then they finally came and god, was I happy. The started off with “I’m Not Made By Design”, which was a prefect start. And then they basically continued playing all the big hits, switching between their old and new albums and fast and slow songs. It was really really really amazing. I especially enjoyed “I Was Just A Kid”. I don’t think I never headbanged that much at a concert. I mean, I didn’t headbanged like you’re probably imagining it right now – but I did like the Laura version, the easy version. And I was soooo hyped up, holy moly. I screamed, danced, sang my lungs out and enjoyed every single second like it was my last one.

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And as I already said, they were so damn amazing. They really are one those bands that sound like 100000000 times better live. Which is pretty hard if you know how amazing their albums sound. And Conor was so freaking cute. I could really see that he was really comfortable being there on that stage. I remember him being all nervous at the Reading show. And comparing it to last Friday, I really do get all proud inside. Because he and his band made so much progress in the last year and I’m so damn happy.

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But was I especially love about Conor is his humor and his awkwardness. Like, he danced around and smiled and I enjoyed watching him with his bandmates so much. They really are an amazing pack of musicians. And you could sense that they love what they’re doing. Oh and I loved the part when it was just Conor on the stage, with his acoustic guitar that is far too big for his body, but let’s be honest, that just adds even more to the cuteness. He sang a cover of Tom Petty’s “Free Fallin'” and yeah, I of course teared up a bit. It was just too emotional.

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And, of course, their last song “Amsterdam” really was one of the highlights. Until that point the energy had built up more and more and then when the song started it was really to burst and it nearly blew the roof off, no joke. The dynamics was freaking breathtaking. We all jumped and screamed and sang and I felt so alive at that moment, I felt like the happiest person on earth. So I really have to thank NBT and their support acts for again creating a night that I will surely never ever forget. Thank you so much for making me so happy. See, that’s why I love music so much. It’s literally my happy place.

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So yeah guys, there’s that. Another unforgetful concert and another story for me to tell and another reason for me to love music and concerts and bands. It all makes me so happy. And I really hope that you enjoyed this little post too. Please don’t hesitate to leave a comment down below. And, as always, I wish you all an amazing weekend and thanks for reading. x

Another Day – Another Concert Hola everyone. As you already know me so well, you know that I love going to concert.