#he was probably about ???? 19??? 20 max???

[diaz-fox]

had an experience today at the cinema lmao

[gretagerwigsmuse]

rocketman: part i - it's just my job five days a week

Summary: in which lieutenant commander bradshaw is on a three month special detachment in the pacific and the holidays have never felt lonelier for either of you. it's just three months, it'll be fine, right?

OR you and bradley write each other 159 emails

Pairing: Rooster x Fem!Reader 11.8k

Warnings: 18+, explicit language, suggestive dialogue, bradley needs to remember this is a government email server...(okay yes, i am perfectly aware that our esteemed lieutenant commander would probably get kicked out of the navy for some of these emails…that being said, i also don’t particularly care! we’re playing fast and loose with the time stamps too because i may be smart, but math has never been a strong suit of mine!) enjoy the companion playlist! rest of the series can be found here!

12/17 @ 6:19am

I miss you already and I haven’t even left the parking lot. I’m still in my car typing this after having stayed for probably far too long watching your C-40 take off (like people were staring at me I was there so long)(and, yes, I looked up the name of the plane). Pete asked me if I wanted to get breakfast with him, but I said no. Felt too lost. Plus, I need to get ready for work. We’re going to get dinner on Wednesday before I head up to Berkeley Thursday morning, though!

Hope you have a safe transport and settle onboard quickly. I left you something in your duffle bag (yes, it’s safe to open around other people…head out of the gutter, Bradshaw).

Love you and stay safe, x

12/18 @ 5:46pm 

Just dropped off the gifts at the Junior League for Caroline’s adopt a child thing. She was completely in her element (they gave her a clipboard and a bullhorn!), though she did say we went wayyy too over the top. But little Carter asked for all that stuff! We couldn’t just not get it all for him? She also appreciated your wrapping skills, very impressed with the bows and tight corners. I met a couple of her friends there, which was nice and they invited me to stay for drinks (the prosecco was flowing…), but I wanted to head home. 

I miss you so much already, it feels weird not going over to your place after work and making dinner and prepping lunch together - and it’s only been two days. I know you’re on a comms blackout for the next couple days, so I’m just gonna keep sending these so you’ll have a bunch to read all at once.

All my love, x

12/19 @ 11:48am

My brother and Lauren decided to come out here for Christmas after all! My dad was so excited when he called me, but I think Mary’s a little less enthused. Feels like shit knowing we were the backup option for them. Apparently, Lauren’s mom is sick and the whole house is in disarray (not hard in that family…) so my dad is paying for them to fly in from New York tomorrow. I think it’ll be nice, we’ll almost have a full set (baring you, of course, my darling rocketman), so the house won’t be as lonely. Do you think we’ll get to talk on Christmas or Christmas Eve? You should be getting a package soon (‘twas preemptively sent!) and are under strict orders not to open it until Christmas Eve, buddy!

Going to dinner with Pete tonight, I’ll let you know how it goes. Amelia’s coming with us, but I don’t know about Penny? I hope they like the gifts we got them. I’m going to stop by your place, do a once over, and make sure the tree is ready for Pete to take, etc. before I leave on Thursday.

Love you and talk soon! x

12/20 @ 7:03am

House looked good! In my seat on the plane. If my morals were shakier, I would 1000% have taken Max up on his offer to fly me up to Berkeley. But alas! Climate change is real and private jets account for 20x as many carbon emissions as commercial planes, so I am up at the ass-crack of dawn for this 7:15am flight. I’ll message you when I land, love you!

12/20 @ 9:04am

Just landed - easy flight. Now to find my dad in arrivals…

Love you, talk when you get the chance! x

12/23 @ 4:45am

Hey sweetheart! Back online and all settled in. I’m bunking with Payback and we actually have a pretty decent layout. He graciously offered to give me the bottom bunk, due to my ‘geriatric status.’ Honestly, I’m just glad I don’t have to sleep in the bunk room with the ensigns and rest of the crew. I forgot how noisy it is being on an aircraft carrier, which makes Payback’s snoring surprisingly pleasant. I’m glad he and Bob are with me. The rest of this squadron’s from Lemoore and Bob knows some of them. It’s interesting seeing him and Payback fly together, but they mesh really well.

Glad Mav is there to keep an eye on you. 

Okay, I had way too much fun picking out all those presents, so I really hope Carter loves them too. And please tell me you have a picture of Caroline yelling into the bullhorn? I can truly think of nothing scarier than Caroline Calloway ordering the young women of San Diego county around like Santa’s chief elf. And speaking of gifts, I loved my pictures. The one from the Christmas party is my favorite, did Fanboy take it? I saw him running around with his Pentax. When the hell did you have time to print it? I’ve got it hanging up in my bunk so I can see it every night. 

I still don’t understand why you don’t fly into Oakland instead of SFO? Like I get it, you’re not a Spirit or SW girl, but kid….it’s an hour and forty minute flight? Live a little. And I think it’ll be nice having your brother and Lauren around for Christmas. How many people do you think it’ll be? I always loved seeing Christmas Eves with large families in movies and stuff, all the chaos and whatnot? But it’s just gonna be you five Christmas Day? I’ve heard rumblings that I might be first in line for a Facetime on Christmas Eve, so save some time for me too, kid. I’ll let you know for sure in a couple days. 

Okay, think we’re all caught up now. Talk soon and love you so much,

Your Bradley

12/23 @ 9:08am

Bubs! I read your email four times since I woke up, I can’t stop smiling. I’m glad you’re all settled in - Reuben’s snoring and ageism aside haha. How’s the food? Do you want earplugs? A sleep mask? Are earplugs allowed for sleeping? What if you need to get up right away and you can’t hear? I could send you a white noise machine? Or is there a fear of hacking with that? I should’ve done more research on this before you left. Tell me if you need anything, I’ll send it out express! Oh, I’m just so happy to hear from you. Keep me posted!

Lots of love, x

12/23 @ 8:53pm

You and me, hot date tomorrow night at 11:45pst - don’t be late. (And look cute.)

Your Bradley

12/23 @ 8:55pm

I’ll be there 😉 Love you, x

12/25 @ 9:56am

Bradley Bradshaw you absolute sneak! How on Earth did you pull a Christmas miracle off!?! Mary said she had no clue, so I’m extremely impressed you got my dad to keep that secret!? I was totally not expecting another present from you? The cooking lessons and apron were more than enough - to say nothing about moving in together!?! I love the bracelet so much, you have no idea. I started crying when I opened it! Mary took a video, which I’m sure she’ll send you. God, Bradley? You didn’t have to do that! It’s perfect, it’s like we’re locked together. I’m gonna wear it everyday. Please email me later if you get the chance! 

(Also, Lauren looked really jealous 😉 my brother was sweating)

Love you and Merry Christmas Rocketman! x

12/25 @ 11:38am

Ummm, not sure what you’re talking about, kid? That sounds like something Santa would do? Probably heard about how good you’ve been this year? x

12/25 @ 11:40am

Thank you, I love it so much and wish I could give you the biggest hug and kiss right now. I’ll have an extra slice of babka for you tonight, talk soon and Merry Christmas, Bradley! Love you x

12/27 @ 4:49am

I miss sleeping next to you. Whenever I can’t sleep, I think about the way you looked at me in the living room after our Christmas party. You looked so happy and I hate that I have to leave you for all our firsts. First Christmas, first New Year’s, first Valentine’s Day. And god, sweetheart, you’re so fucking gorgeous it makes me want to lose my mind sometimes. Always thinking about you, Bradley 

12/27 @ 8:38am

I miss sleeping next to you, too (especially since your body is like a furnace and you hold me close when I get cold). And I know you being away during the holidays is hard, but look at it this way - we’ll just have our firsts next year. Next year will be our first Christmas, first New Year’s, first Valentine’s Day together, not an ocean apart. We have all the time in the world, rocketman. Love you today and every day x

12/29 @ 6:02pm

There’s already so many things I’m dying to tell you and stories about the squadron we’re teaming up with, but the Navy will have my ass if I give away too many details so I’m just going to leave it at this: are we sure Max doesn’t have a twin on another continent? Take that as you will. What’re your plans for New Year’s? Your Bradley

12/30 @ 9:20am

Sorry for the delayed response! A minor issue with my brother and my dad that I won’t bore you with had the whole house in a tizzy. Thankfully, he and Lauren are gone even though my dad still won’t tell me what the issue was? Anyway! God, I wish I could hear more about Max’s twin? I am honestly kind of scared about knowing there’s a Max doppelgänger in the Navy (jokes!). For New Year’s, I’m going to this party with Mary and dad in the city, it’s at this fancy venue and I have a cute black dress! It’s very different for me and I wish you were here to see it! I’ll have to wear it again. Message me when it’s the New Year your time! Love you! x

01/01 @ 12:09am

Happy New Year, sweetheart! They had a little party for the officers - we even got cake and Bob snuck me and Payback seconds somehow. It’s always the quiet ones you gotta look out for. You absolutely need to send me pictures of you in that dress, I can’t wait to see it on you in person someday. Hope you have a great time with your dad and Mary, give them my best. Love you and again Happy New Year! 

Your Bradley

01/01 @ 12:01am

Happy New Year, Bradley!!! You got cake!! You broke some rules! I approve! Milk them for all the cake they’re worth! I’ll send some pics of the three of us and one just for you big boy 😉 Talk soon and love you so so much! x

01/01 @ 10:59am

Had a late start! Here are the pics from last night! Try and sneak some more cake xx

[mary_and_dad_being_annoying.jpg]

[me.jpg]

01/02 @ 6:12am

You know you labeled the pictures wrong…luckily no one was behind me…

01/02 @ 9:04am

Who? Me? I would NEVER! (Just trying to keep you on your toes.) Hope the flying is going well and you’re staying safe, B! Love you!

01/03 @ 8:00pm

Yeah, it’s going well. It’s so different flying on the open ocean after so long? Last time was in September when I went to Hong Kong. The desert is cool, don’t get me wrong, but seeing the clouds and the water together is unreal. The pink and purple clouds remind me of you (sorry, that was lame). You still gotta let me take you up, kid. I’ve heard Mav is trying to convince you, but you gotta let me be the one. Can’t trust just anyone with my girl. Love B

01/04 @ 10:13am

Bradley…he’s practically your father, I’m pretty sure you can trust him to take me up in a plane, you silly boy. Not that I’m saying you won’t be my first…but come on! And it’s not lame. I like that the pink and purple clouds remind you of me. Every time I see a plane I send a little call out for your safety. Gotta keep you safe, rocketman! Talk soon and love you! x

01/06 @ 4:45pm

My parents just dropped me off at the airport and no matter how many times I leave them, I always cry. I think the only time I didn’t cry when I left their house was when you were with me over Thanksgiving. You always make it better, bubs.

They’re coming down in a couple weeks to help me start packing, anything in the house you wouldn’t want them to see while dropping off boxes? I can still bring my old bed, etc for the guest room, right?

All my love, x

01/06 @ 9:58pm

I think I get that, having you around this time makes it different. I’ve never had anyone to really write to while I’ve been away before. Sure, I talked to my grandparents when they were still around and my aunts and uncles, Nat, Ice, and a couple others, but not like this. And I don’t ever want to not feel like this again. 

I’m an open book, kid. Ain’t got nothing to hide. And yeah, anything like that feel free to bring with you for the guest room or office. It was the bed, nightstands, and dresser and then your couch for the office, yeah? We can get new bedding and pillows for it if you want? I’m on comms blackout for a couple days, so message me whenever you want so I can read them all when we’re back online.

Your Bradley

01/06 @ 10:07pm

Perfect! Love you and stay safe, rocketman.

01/06 @ 10:09pm

Love you too, kid.

01/09 @ 6:11pm

Bradley, I don’t mean to alarm you, but there was a raccoon in your garage! Scratch that, a FAMILY of raccoons!??! I’m sure Mr Harrington was ready to call the cops when he heard my scream. They’re so cute, but also terrifying at the same time? So, I called Pete and he came right over, a true knight in shining armor! Amelia and I did a THOROUGH sweep of the house to make sure they were relegated to the garage. Pete got them out safe and sound with a random tennis racket and your 4 iron, but somebody’s coming tomorrow to check on how they got in there. And I know they aren’t hurting anyone, but I just don’t want there to be any issues later on? (The babies were actually so cute and reminded me of my cat growing up, Porter.) Anyway! Enough drama for tonight, I hope that gets a laugh out of you - talk soon!

Love you! x

01/10 @ 8:05am

Well, the exterminator got here around 7:30 and sprayed all this stuff and blocked the hole in the crawl space of the garage. He showed me pictures and let me tell you, there was quite the nest up there. These raccoons were living large over the holidays. 

01/12 @ 5:21pm

Okay! I’m in the parking lot, waiting for my first cooking class to start. Is it weird I’m a little nervous? I hope everyone else’s skill level is similar, I don’t like feeling behind. I brought my new apron, ironed it and everything. I feel a little like Ina Garten, isn’t she just divine? Okay, okay, I’m going in now! I’ll let you know how it goes! Thanks again for getting me these xx

01/12 @ 7:03pm

I feel so tired? Like my hand cramped a little bit? We started off the class with knife skills, which we’re going to do every week and then made this “simple” egg dish, which was NOT simple and I overcooked the egg. Ina would be so disappointed. Alas! Onto next week. Love you!

01/15 @ 9:12pm

Bradley you’re not going to BELIEVE what just happened on Succession. My heart is POUNDING? Do you think if I called and asked really nicely the Navy would get an HBO subscription for everyone? That is what I would like my tax dollars to go towards. Can you get me a direct line to someone in charge please? Love you!

01/16 @ 7:47am

Not to worry my little Barefoot Contessa, I have returned back to civilization (ie the internet), though am dismayed to have missed this mind blowing Succession episode? Has Perry Mason started back up again or will we be able to watch that together? 

Bob and I were in the gym earlier and he almost dropped a dumbbell on my foot, I swear my life flashed before my eyes. But I had a new PR on the bench press today, up to 285 pounds. Glad the cooking lesson went well though! What’s the class makeup like? x Bradley 

01/16 @ 9:04am

I’m glad you’re back online and safe! Perry Mason has not started yet, though I’m still certain you’re the only person under the age of 55 that watches it (I guess I should say we’re the only people under the age of 55 that watch it, but whatever). You’ve also missed a couple Top Chef episodes, but we can always binge this season later. 

There’s about 12 of us in the class and it’s pretty evenly split? Though there’s tragically this really annoying couple who were at the station next to me. I hope we get to change next week, I don’t think I can watch them feed each other food another week. 

And I’m still waiting for that direct line to the Navy, Bradshaw! Love you! x

01/1 6 @ 6:59pm

Wait, wait, how did I miss there? There was a WHAT in my garage? A raccoon? Multiple raccoons? We need to get a dog or a cat or something. x Bradley 

01/18 @ 7:02am

Bradley!! I know we talked about a trip once you got home (provided you still feel up for it with the transition and all), what if we went here? I was talking about our tentative plans with my dad and Mary before I went back to San Diego and they went to Punta Mita this past fall and LOVED it! What do you think? Love you!

01/18 @ 6:03pm

Holy shit! That looks absolutely amazing, yes I’d love to go! Can we afford that though? It looks expensive? xBradley

01/18 @ 6:05pm

YAY!! Ahh, I’m so excited you have no idea! I want to hug and kiss you so bad right now! We can fly for free since I have a bunch of AA points (thank you pwc) and then I have like a million Amex points, so it’s not full price!! 

01/18 @ 6:12pm

When you say ‘like a million’ do you actually mean a million or?

01/18 @ 6:14pm

Yes! I’ve had this card for like 15 years! My whole family does the pooling on it! It’s a drop in the bucket, promise! Plus, I always use my other card for work and that has a whole bunch of Bonvoy points on it, too. We could stay at one of those? I think there’s a St Regis next door?

01/18 @ 6:22pm

Sweetheart, I want to go, I just don’t want you to waste all those points on this. 

01/18 @ 6:26pm

What if we go for 6 nights instead of 9? Maybe no plunge pool? Or we could pay cash instead? And then I could get 6x the points from paying that way? So, really….the points just keep accumulating, we’ve got to use them sometime! The points can pay for the flights and the hotel and then we can split the room charges and incidentals 50:50?

Will you think about it? You don’t have to give me an answer right away and we can always pick another hotel? But if we want to go someplace in late March/early April, I think we should book soon with spring break and all? Not that I imagine many coeds will be staying at the Four Seasons, but you never know…

01/18 @ 6:33pm

You gotta send me a ppt on all this points stuff, you know math stresses me out. And no, I don’t think many coeds will be staying at the Four Seasons, kid. 

01/18 @ 6:37pm

Can I send you a dossier with everything!?! Even if you say no to that I’m doing it anyway ;) just promise me you’ll think about it, please? I’ll do whatever you want, Bradley <3

01/18 @ 6:40pm

Yes, please send the dossier my way henceforth, Moneypenny. 

And you’ll do whatever I want, huh? Might have to send you a dossier of my own now…

(But yes, I promise I’ll seriously consider everything. I just don’t want you to feel like you have to spend all this money to make me happy. I’d say we’d both be happy camping out on the beach, but I think that might be a security issue down there, plus neither of us like camping - anyway, you know what I mean.)

01/18 @ 6:43pm

Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw!! Is this a dossier for my eyes only? What will M say!? I’ll send you mine if you send me yours?

(But seriously, thank you! I’ll send you more specifics tomorrow - like pricing and whatnot - and you can take a couple days to think it over. And thank you for clarifying the camping thing, I was worried for a second there.)

I love you so much rocketman and we’ll talk (email) tomorrow 

x Moneypenny 

01/18 @ 6:46pm

I’d say ‘sleep tight,’ but that’s a given considering you haven’t been fucked in a couple weeks. 

(Perfect, I genuinely am really excited about it, just want to make sure it works out for us both.)

Love you so much, kid 

Your Bradley

01/18 @ 6:58pm

Bradley Bradshaw!! You did not just say that over a government email server! 

Imissyourcocksobadlyit’sdrivingmeinsane

01/18 @ 7:01pm

Couldn’t help it. Plus, we both know it’s true. 

01/18 @ 7:04pm

Oh, shut up. Shut me up

01/18 @ 11:43pm

I’m sorry if I came off too strong about planning earlier, I might’ve gotten a little carried away and been a little too eager about planning something five days after you’re home from a three month detachment. If at any time before you come home or even right after you come home you don’t feel up to the trip, please please please tell me. I want to do something nice for you and give you a chance to truly relax, but I’d hate for it to come at a price. So, just let me know, okay? Say the word and we’ll push it, alright? I don’t exactly know what you’re going through, but tell me if it’s ever too much. I’ll always be here, promise. Love you x

[dossier_for_your_eyes_only.ppt]

01/19 @ 8:29am

Kid, no. I promise I’ll tell you. You know I love how excited you get planning things. I think I like it so much because you take care of it all. Sure, you ask for my opinion and what I want, but I just have to tell you one thing, one idea and you take care of it. 

Funny though, isn’t it? How it’s totally opposite in the other side of our relationship? You tell me one thing, one idea and I take care of all of it? Bet it’s hard for you not having someone around to do that for you? Maybe next time we Facetime we can talk more about that? x B

01/19 @ 10:11am

Luckily, I have a very creative imagination, Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw. 

See right now, I’m in my office, sitting at my desk, feeling so overwhelmed. It almost hurts how overwhelmed and frustrated I am. And you bust down the door, hair windswept like you’d flown to Del Mar, and you have that slutty flight suit on and I don’t even mind that you’re sweaty and gross. You smell absolutely divine and I rake my hands through your hair as you eat me out underneath my glass desk. I get a conference call, but you don’t stop the entire time. You like how squirmy and fussy I get, I can’t focus on the deliverable I’m working on for the client. You like that I can’t control myself, that I squeeze my thighs around your head. Eventually, you can’t take it anymore, your cock is aching so badly, and you need to fuck me on top of my desk. You’re so strong it almost breaks. You fuck me so good everyone in the office can hear me crying out for you. 

(actually, I’m on the couch, watching college football, but it’s more fun to imagine you fucking me in my office - see, creative imagination! Make sure you get a quiet room for that Facetime...)

Love x

01/19 @ 7:29pm

You think you’re funny, huh? You have any more of those thoughts, feel free to send them my way. ‘m taking out that picture you gave me for Christmas right now. How you taking care of yourself? My imagination isn’t as creative as yours. B

01/19 @ 7:40pm

Guess you’ll have to wait for our next Facetime…

x

01/20 @ 4:24pm

Your dad and Mary write me emails, you know. They aren’t as good correspondents as you are (for how could they possibly be, my dear?), but they check in about once a week or so. Mary sends me some of the articles she gives her students and talks about the show she’s watching with your dad. Your dad mainly talks about you. It makes me wish my parents were still around to do this stuff with me. Just checking in and writing emails and bragging about me to my girlfriend? How was yesterday’s class?

Your Bradley

01/20 @ 5:39m

I didn’t know they wrote you that often and I’m beyond embarrassed that my dad talks about me that much? But come on, Bradley…you have someone who does that, too? He’s about 5’8” (on a good day), looks great in a leather jacket, and just spent about two hours last weekend cleaning your gutters and telling me about how you won your high school’s debate scholarship?? Like how could you not tell me that? It’s literally one of the hottest things I’ve heard about you!

Class was good! They taught us a trick to cut onions without crying and one of the other girls complimented my apron! We’re doing meats next week, cutting, marinating, cooking, etc. and I’m excited!

01/20 @ 5:42pm

Oh gee, I bet it’s just awful for you to have Mav around all the time. Knight in shining armor…

01/20 @ 5:48pm

He’s not a bother! And it’s not all the time! We’re actually going to get lunch together on Saturday! It’s this new place on the water.

01/20 @ 5:50pm

Sounds like a cute little date! You’ll have to tell me how he is. Love you so much B

01/20 @ 5:55pm

I’ll keep ya posted, bubs! Love you!

01/22 @ 10:01am

Breaking news, kid. Your esteemed, naval aviator boyfriend is going to be on 60 Minutes at the end of February. Totally came out of left field, but I couldn’t say anything until they finished filming. It’s about the Navy in the Pacific and “the lost art of shipbuilding.” They even rigged up a camera on my plane and everything, it was so cool. I’ve been dying to tell you, but again couldn’t say anything until it was official. I probably won’t be on it long since they interviewed the Admiral and Pac Fleet Commander for most of it, but yeah, Payback and Bob and I will be on with my girl Norah. I made sure I had enough sunscreen on so I was camera ready at all times. Love you B

01/22 @ 10:09am

YOU’RE FUCKING SHITTING ME????? Oh my god, Bradley! That’s amazing! Margie even ran into my office to see what made me shriek! I am TOTALLY having a viewing party! Oh my god, how do you think it went? Did they get your good side? What about hair and makeup? I know you get helmet hair, bubs. 

Seriously, so so excited and proud of you, Bradley! I’m going to make my dad and Mary come down for it! She doesn’t teach on Mondays, so this is perfect for them to stay over Sunday night! But now don’t go letting all that fame get to your head, Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw 😉 Love you so much x

01/24 @ 12:17pm

Rocketman - 

I was sitting at my desk earlier and listening to some music before my 12:30 meeting and Elton John’s Rocket Man popped up on my shuffle. Obviously, as you are my rocketman, I always think of you whenever I hear it, but today the lyrics really scratched that special part of my brain, so I did a deep dive into the song’s origins. 

Please note, I’m including this time in my billable hours to the client (re. you). My findings are as follows:

Bernie Taupin was inspired by a Ray Bradbury story written in 1951 titled ‘The Rocket Man’ - not drugs as the urban legend states! Drugs! Imagine!

Bradbury’s ‘The Rocket Man’ was first published in Maclean’s, a weekly Canadian magazine, before it was published in the short story collection ‘The Illustrated Man’ that same year

‘The Illustrated Man’ later was made into a film, though ‘The Rocket Man’ story was notably absent

Some of more popular and renowned stories from the collection include ‘The Veldt’ and ‘The Long Rain,’ the latter of which is commonly read in high school honors English

Was client in honors English? Please confirm in follow up correspondence

Client has mentioned extensive library resources at disposal - perhaps he can check this collection out on his next visit? But for now, an executive summary has been provided:

With space travel more commonplace in society, Doug’s father, an astronaut, is sent on frequent, three- month journeys into space

Despite missing his dad, Doug also longs to be a Rocket Man, though his mother frequently prevails on Doug to beg his father to stay on Earth and be with the family

“What’s it like, out in space?” Mother shot me a frightened glance. It was too late. Dad stood there for a full half minute trying to find an answer, then he shrugged.“It’s the best thing in a lifetime of best things.” Then he caught himself. “Oh, it’s really nothing at all. Routine. You wouldn’t like it.” He looked at me, apprehensively. “But you always go back.” “Habit.”

The father finds that his work is ruining his life, but the draw of the stars is too great: "You don’t know what it is. Every time I’m out there I think, if I ever get back to Earth I’ll stay there; I’ll never go out again. But I got out, and I guess I’ll always go out.”

Even while on vacation with the family, having Thanksgiving dinner, or sitting on the back porch, the father’s eyes are always on the sky…

Doug’s father begs him to not be like him, to not be a rocket man, but what happens when his father goes on one last journey to the stars?

Through much reflection, I have decided that ‘The Rocket Man’ was written about you - and your mom and your dad and me and on and on until there is no longer a need for Rocket Men - or the rocket man simply stops and breaks the cycle

You are both the Rocket Man and the little boy, forever waiting for his father to come home from space

The allure of flying, of being a ‘rocket man,’ is both too great and too sad for you to ignore

None of this is to say the rocket man is selfish, no. He simply cannot resist the temptation. He knows nothing other than the thrill and peace of being amongst the stars

And his mother shielding Doug from the sun at the end is like your mom asking Mav to pull your papers, she does it to save him, but it cannot keep him from becoming his father

Needless to say - I had to postpone my 12:30 meeting until tomorrow as my eyes were far too puffy and any word I tried to say felt like cotton in my mouth.

I miss you and I love you - your ‘Lilly’  

01/24 @ 8:22pm

Fuck - I love you so much. My clever girl.

01/24 @ 8:28pm

I pour my heart out to you and that’s all you have to say, rocketman? ‘Fuck - I love you so much’

(of course, I also love you so much, my clever boy.)

01/24 @ 8:30pm

Darling - it’s going to take me a little longer to come up with any commentary you deem appropriate, so for the sake of time, yes. I gotta read this story in full. I’ll be at the library at my earliest convenience. ‘The client’ will send an annotated copy with his notes henceforth.

01/24 @ 8:32pm

Of course, sweet boy. Goodnight, I love you so much. x

01/25 @ 11:44am

As promised, my darling girl. Love you.

[b.bradshaw_the rocket man_final paper.pdf]

01/25 @ 7:14pm

Oh Bradley! I love you so much, rocketman. Yes, I couldn’t have said it better. Yours x

01/26 @ 10:39am

Bradley! They’re sending me to London in February for two weeks! I even get a swanky corporate apartment for the stay. I wish you could come with me - even if it was just for a long weekend? We could go to all my favorite restaurants and afternoon tea and for walks in all the parks. One day it’ll work out! 

But tragedy of all tragedies! I just realized I’m going to miss a couple cooking lessons when I’m in London! I already emailed the instructor before today’s class and she said there’s other classes throughout the week that are behind us, so I can make it up with them! Ahhh I’m so excited! Talk soon, love you!

01/26 @ 11:13pm

I didn’t realize how nervous I was about the trip until I went to bed tonight. It’ll be my first trip abroad since I got my promotion in November. Plus, it’s a completely different client than my last trip abroad and I’ve only met one person on this new London team before. Sometimes I go into these meetings and still feel like a little kid? I’m always the youngest person in the room and normally the only woman and on one hand, that’s cool? But sometimes I feel like someone’s daughter instead of their colleague? Like these guys are my dad’s age? And they’re actually supposed to listen to what I have to say about their company? Do you ever feel like that? Like you don’t really belong, despite knowing you’ve earned your place? I wish you were beside me right now. My bed feels way too big tonight. Love you.

01/27 @ 7:48am

Sweetheart! I am so unbelievably proud of you! That’s amazing! You gotta celebrate, go out to dinner with Caro and Darcy, maybe even Nat! I know you’ve been working so hard these last couple of weeks, you absolutely deserve this. I can’t say I know exactly what you’re going through, but yes. I have absolutely felt like I haven’t belonged or deserved something despite having ‘checked off all the boxes.’ I felt that way when I got promoted to LC and when I got that award in October. Everytime I see it on my uniform, I feel a bit like a faker? Like do I really deserve this? But then I remember the way you smiled at me when I got back to my seat that night and how proud of me you were and I think maybe I do deserve it? Plus, I also think of how goddamn gorgeous you looked all fucked out later that night. 

And please note, I would happily slip into bed alongside you, especially since my bed feels way too small tonight. Love you, Bradley

01/27 @ 10:56am

Thank you for earlier. I don’t know, sometimes I just feel like I’m just too soft for all of this? Like I’m always trying to prove something to everyone and I get a little lost. Tell me something good? x

01/27 @ 7:01pm

How about this? Every time I go up in the sky and see the way the sun hits the clouds, I think of you. I’ve never wanted to be with someone as much as I want to be with you. I love you so much, kid

Your Bradley 

01/27 @ 7:06pm

Sometimes I can’t believe we love each other this much, it feels like a dream  x

01/27 @ 7:11pm

I can. Your Bradley 

01/30 @ 7:08am

i slept in one of your shirts last night. it doesn’t smell like you anymore, but it feels like you: soft and safe and warm x

01/30 @ 7:23am

Well I spray my pillowcase with your perfume whenever I miss you so I guess we’re even

Your Bradley

ps - can you send me another bottle?

01/30 @ 7:34am

You’re already out? What sort of illicit behavior are you engaging in with that perfume bottle? 

01/30 @ 10:33pm

I burrow my face in my pillow so I can smell it while I fist my cock, why? What’d you have in mind?

01/30 @ 10:37pm

How does that work though? Like genuinely? Do you jack off with Reuben in the top bunk? Or wait till he’s in the gym? I’ve been curious about this for a while now. What about the showers? Is it like an open floor plan thing? Or are there stalls? Is there a Zillow listing for this aircraft carrier?

01/30 @ 10:41pm

Now why would I ruin the mystery? 

01/30 @ 10:43pm

Bradley!!!!

01/30 @ 10:44pm

Atta girl, that’s the spirit! Love you 

02/02 @ 6:30pm

I am so sick of going to the gym. It seems like it’s all Payback and I do lately. We got this new workout regime that’s been killing me - don’t say it’s because I’m old. Though, I have been using my Theragun. Payback does my back if I do his in return. It was only awkward the first time he turned it on too hard and yelped (please tell everyone that). 

02/02 @ 6:46pm

Oh, so you and Rueben Theragun each other, huh? Say more Lieutenant Commander!

02/04 @ 2:45pm

Going to Pete and Penny’s in a bit to watch the Super Bowl! Max is at the game, apparently his golf buddy Jimmy G hooked him up, though he neglected to bring me or Caroline. I feel like you would’ve been his first choice, so take that as a compliment I suppose. Do you guys do anything onboard for it? I have $350 on the 49ers winning by 3. Have a lovely day my darling boy x

02/04 @ 9:30pm

Guess who’s as snug as a bug on a rug in her bed AND $1400 dollars richer? That would be me! When you get home we’re going to Juniper and Ivy, my treat, bubs! x

02/06 @ 4:57am

Awww sweetheart are you gonna sugar mama me again? 

02/06 @ 7:03am

You do know the only reason you’re getting away with that is because there’s an ocean between us, right? 

02/06 @ 6:00pm

Sorry, couldn’t resist! Love you! B

02/06 @ 6:10pm

You’re lucky I love you so much. x

02/08 @ 9:58pm

Can you imagine if I was gone for 20 years?

02/08 @ 10:11pm

Bradley that’s not funny 

02/08 @ 10:13pm

It’s not supposed to be. I’m reading the Odyssey and it got me thinking. 

02/08 @ 10:16pm

Bradley I love you something awful, but you are such an old man sometimes. 

Are you going through some sort of midlife crisis reading the Odyssey while you’re at sea?? Is the Old Man and the Sea next?

(ps i love the thought of you reading in your bunk in your spare time and being so struck by something composed thousands of years ago that you have to email me)

02/08 @ 10:20pm

They wait 20 years to get back to each other - practically half their lives. They miss so many things and barely knew each other before he left, but they’re still so - I don’t even know? They’re just so intent on getting back to the other in Odysseus’s case? While Penelope makes sure there’s something for him to come back to? And I must’ve read this stanza ten times before I had to email you: 

"...the gods cast me upon Ogygia, Calypso's island, home of the dangerous sea nymph with glossy braids, and the goddess took me in in all her kindness, welcomed me warmly, cherished me, even vowed to make me immortal, ageless, all my days - but she never won the heart inside me, never" 

And I know it’s not a perfect comparison or parallel, but I read that last bit and I couldn’t help but think of you? And how you’re the one who won my heart and it’s always going to be that way. Whether I see you in twenty seconds or twenty years.

02/08 @ 10:23pm

You’d come home to me whether it took twenty seconds or twenty years. You’d come home to me and I’d know you anywhere. I love you so much. 

02/08 @ 10:58pm

“Now help me, please, to get back home, and quickly! I miss my family. I have been gone so long it hurts.” 

Your Bradley

02/09 @ 7:03pm

At the airport for London! Taking off! And I may or may not have used points to upgrade to a Club World seat…but like? It’s a nonstop flight, so it’s okay, right? Work’s already paying for business class? It’s points from my work card? It’ll be fine, right?

I had to take an ativan in the lounge. I just hate that I still get so nervous whenever I fly long distance? I fly all the time, I shouldn’t be like this? You know, one time, I pretended you were flying my plane. I know it’s kind of dumb and silly and a completely different type of plane, but it made me feel better because you’d never let anything happen to me. 

Anyway, we’re book buddies!! I went to the bookstore a couple days ago and got a copy! I read the Odyssey back in high school, but forgot so much. I was reading in the lounge and this part made me think of you:

“...this lovely house, my marriage home, so full of wealth and life, which I suppose I will remember even in my dreams.”

I’ll text you when I land my darling boy, love you x

02/10 @ 6:02am

You gotta squeeze every last bit of your per diem out of pwc. You’ve been working way too hard lately. Fuck it, on the way home just put the upgrade on your work card or put it on mine. Have a safe (rest of your) flight - maybe one day you’ll let me take you up. Love Bradley 

02/10 @ 10:08am

Just landed and on my way to the office (already…)

I thought of you as I read and stared out the window on the plane. I could pretend I’m flying towards you, rather than further away. I can’t imagine how you feel doing this everyday, but I imagine it’s like feeling limitless, like everything is in front of you, there for the taking. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll let you take me up one day. 

I’ll keep you posted on how everything’s going if you do the same. All my love x

02/12 @ 5:49am

How’s it going, kid? They working you too hard? You’re in London! Try to enjoy it, you deserve it. One of the guys I’m with gave me a restaurant rec for you, said the drinks were amazing, his wife loved it. Do something fun while you’re there! And send me some pictures dammit!

Love you, 

Bradley 

02/12 @ 8:22am

Bradley! It’s been so so crazy here! I feel like I haven’t stopped since I landed. My ‘flat’ is so cute and right by the client’s offices, so it’s an easy commute. I feel so professional taking the Tube places too! It’s one thing I’d like us to have in San Diego as opposed to all the traffic. Also, it’s CHILLY here and I’m so glad I dug my big coat out of storage. I’ll try and check the restaurant out this weekend, I’m gonna sneak in a trip to the Tate, too. I’ve always wanted to see the Turners. Talk soon and love you bunches! x 

02/14 @ 9:54am

Bradley Bradshaw! You absolute SAP! HOW!?! Did you conspire with my dad again? Thank you for the flowers! I’m going to have the biggest smile on my face all day. I love you and hope this is the first of a lifetime of Valentine’s Days together. Always x 

02/14 @ 7:33pm

Happy Valentine’s Day to you too, kid. I’m not gonna lie, I gave your dad very specific instructions for the bouquet (I was going to ask Max, but he’d probably swap it for something ugly and cheap and keep the change…kidding (not)), so I’m glad they turned out well. It was a very big day on board today: we got special red heart cookies for the holiday. The mood was infectious, I can still taste the sprinkles. Maybe you could cook for me on our next Facetime? Have you learned anything good in class lately? It doesn’t have to be fancy, just wanna see you (and maybe also live vicariously through whatever you’re making).  

02/14 @ 7:33pm

Bradley! I think I can swing that for you, when do you think our next call will be? 

02/16 @ 3:18pm

Kid, you spoil me. This package is amazing, I don’t know where to start (just kidding it’s with the Cadbury chocolate and the Sudocrem as my burnt shoulders thank you), but everything is wonderful, thank you. I love hearing about London and seeing the pictures you sent last time. But I do have one complaint…you’re not in any of the pictures, kid, and that’s truly egregious. (Think we won’t be able to Facetime for a while, I gave Payback my slot the other day.)

02/16 @ 3:23pm

That’s not true! I’m in the one in front of the Tate!

02/16 @ 3:25pm

Yeah, but I can’t see you under all those layers! Just want to see your face. It’s been way too long since our last Facetime.

02/16 @ 9:52pm

As requested, Lieutenant Commander. I had one of the girls in the London office take this at dinner tonight. She really did wonders with the lighting and even managed to get my sidecar in the pic! x Love you

02/17 @ 6:55am

You look pretty. New dress? B

02/17 @ 7:17am

Maybe…it was on sale, couldn’t resist. But you’re gonna hate me because all of my clothes are very much not going to fit in your closet. Also, I bought you a new jacket and some socks. x

02/17 @ 7:20am

Ehhh I’m not too worried about the closet thing. But if you keep buying me clothes we might have a problem.

02/17 @ 7:24am

It’s so cute though!! You’re going to look so handsome in it! I got the green one for you!

02/17 @ 7:29am

Okay, admittedly a very nice jacket, thank you. But you are aware that we live in San Diego…

02/17 @ 7:31am

I am aware of that fact, LC Bradshaw. You can wear it when we visit my parents. Hell, I had to get my coat out of my storage closet for this trip. 

02/17 @ 6:53pm

Sighhhhh you raise a good point. Alright, alright, thank you for the jacket and socks my darling girl. What’d you have for dinner last night? We had chicken with these absolutely awful biscuits, tasted like saw dust, my stomach was growling for some more of that Cadbury chocolate (yes, Payback and I ate all of it already, though it was mainly Payback) for hours afterward. 

02/17 @ 6:59pm

Oh my sweet boy! Who do I need to call about your meal plan? Give me the number and I’ll call the Navy up right now. And I had scallops with truffle risotto. It was delicious. Wanted to lick the bowl clean. Love you bubs x

02/19 @ 10:22pm

Bubs, I cannot eat another meal out. I feel like I’m going to burst. I’ve gone to so many work dinners and lunches even before coming here, it almost makes me feel like a glutton. 

I miss you and your cooking (though I’ll have you know that my skills were vastly improving before my trip abroad!) and you standing behind me at the counter while I try to perfectly cut peppers. Sometimes I do it wrong on purpose so you’ll put your arms around me and I can feel the rumble of your voice. Would we call that weaponized incompetence? You better be ready for some Michelin Star meals when you get home, buddy. I just can’t wait to be home with you and roll over next to you in the morning and to tell you to stop snoring and that the battery in the smoke detector needs to be changed. I can’t wait to be home with you and make a life with you. I’m going to be really sappy now, but let me have this because I was reading this poem the other day and thought of you. 

“I am supposed to be touched. I can’t wait to find the person who will come into the kitchen just to smell my neck and get behind me and hug me and breathe me in and make me turn around and make me kiss his face and put my hands in his hair even with my soapy dishwater drips. I am a lovely woman. Who will come into my kitchen and be hungry for me?” (x)

Only a month until you’re home with me, I hope you’re hungry. 

All my love x

02/20 @ 4:50am

It’s only weaponized incompetence if the other person minds. I, however, do not mind. I loved that quote you sent me, going to be thinking about that one for a long time. I hate to tell you this, but I’m gonna be offline for a couple days. I hate that it’s at the end of your trip, but please please message me when you’re leaving/taking off and again when you land, you know I worry. Love you and am so unbelievably proud of you, kid! You killed it in London. Your Bradley

02/20 @ 7:03am

That’s okay, I totally understand. I’ll give you all the details on our next Facetime. In the meantime, I message you when I leave. Stay safe and love you, Bradley! x

02/23 @ 3:45pm

Taking off soon! I got an upgrade again, thankfully! And I made sure to put your new coat in my carry on - I don’t trust British Airways not to lose it! Taking an ativan again so hopefully I’ll sleep the entire flight - love you and talk soon!

02/24 @ 10:33pm

Just landed, slept through….90% of the flight! Apparently, there was bad turbulence, so probably for the best. Now, I know you would never have me deal with that my darling rocketman! Talk later - love you! x

02/25 @ 7:09pm

Feels kind of weird being back? I can’t quite get back into my routine. I’m not sure if it’s jet lag or something else? Feeling a little lost? x

02/26 @ 7:55pm

Bradley!!! You were so good, I’m so so proud of you! Max had everyone over at his place for us to watch you! We have quite the party here including my parents, Pete, Penny and Amelia, Natasha, Mickey and Cielo, Caroline, and Darcy. I’ll have to tell you about the parents meeting later. I wish you had been here for it, they took to each other like bees to honey. 

You looked tragically handsome, I practically had to hold back a moan when you were standing on the flight deck talking to Norah O’Donnell (is she as nice in person as she is on TV?). God, I want to ravish you, you sounded so fucking smart. You know like half the country is going to be in love with you now, right? I’ve got to get back to everyone, Max ordered dinner for us afterwards, but I had to email you as soon as you finished!

Just wanted to let you know how proud of you I am and how much I love you x

02/27 @ 5:09am

Thanks, kid. Sorry it took me a bit to respond, things have been getting a bit crazy, you know, now that I’m a celebrity and all? We’re winding down this training, so the next couple weeks are gonna be full of debriefs and paperwork, which means I should have a more stable schedule. Love you B

02/28 @ 11:48pm

Sometimes I wonder if you were here what would you do? Hold me? Love me? I never feel small except when I’m in your arms. x

02/29 @ 11:48pm

Some nights in bed, if I try really hard, I can imagine I’m laying down next to you. And it makes everything just a little easier. Bradley

03/01 @ 12:56am

I haven’t taken anything besides my fingers in months. You’re going to stretch me out so well when you get home. 

03/01 @ 7:19pm

And I’m gonna mark your ass pink for that comment. I can’t believe you sent that in the middle of the day. You getting yourself off at work? Dirty girl. 

03/01 @ 9:41pm

Never feels as good as when you do it. 

03/01 @ 10:01pm

And my hands pale in comparison to your pretty little cunt. You know that first time we slept together you were so fucking tight, I knew you hadn’t had a good fuck in ages. It gonna be like that again when I come home?

03/01 @ 10:05pm

Where are you going to have me first?

03/01 @ 10:06pm

In our bed, in our house, after you make me dinner in our kitchen. 

03/01 @ 10:09pm

Just over two weeks now, I can’t wait to see you. x

03/03 @ 5:55am

How you holding up, kid? You doing a little better this week work wise? Try and log off around 5 if you can. Don’t want you getting all worn down on me. 

They had us doing these war games yesterday that made me think of you. You would’ve walked circles around some of these other guys I swear. Think I can get a Facetime for us in a couple days? Probably will be our last one before I come home. Love you, B

03/03 @ 7:12am

Bradley! That's the best news I’ve had in ages! I can’t wait to see you! Definitely felt a little lost after coming back from London, but I hope my rut will be over soon? Tying things up with a client is always so lengthy and tedious. 

War games! ‘Would you like to play a game?’ I’d ask if you won, but no one ever wins in the art of war 😉Love you!

03/05 @ 8:54pm

So, here’s a new one. My mom called? She’s going to be stateside and wants to get lunch tomorrow. Could’ve done with a bit more warning, but apparently, she has a layover in San Diego on her way to New York to see my brother? I didn’t even know she was going to see him? I don’t even know if I want to see her? It’s funny, I can already tell you exactly how it’ll play out:

We’ll go to lunch at some sort of vegan restaurant, probably Donna Jean

She’ll make me pay

She’ll try to get me to use some sort of herb to promote weight loss since I’m looking a bit “pudgy” around the face

Though she’ll forget to ask about you, she’ll tell me about her latest string of failed relationships with bartenders and surf instructors in Canggu. Or is it Ubud? I genuinely don’t remember, she started in Ubud, but honestly my knowledge of Balinese geography is rudimentary at best 

She’ll ask how ‘that woman’ is doing as if Mary is just the woman my dad is seeing, not the woman who raised me and my brother

And finally, she’ll ask for money though betting is still open as to what for!

So, what do you say? Wanna put a wager on it? Your terms.

Love you! x

03/06 @ 6:30am

$100 she orders the caesar and makes you pay. I’m not even going to entertain the third parlay, pretty girl. Oddly feeling like she’s got a winner on her hands so yes she’ll talk about her new paramour. Does she really call Mary ‘that woman?’ And yes, without a question, she will ask you for money.

Your move my gorgeous girl,

Bradley

03/06 @ 7:49pm

I really wish you were here right now. She doesn’t even know me, but she somehow always manages to make me feel small. 

Caesar - no croutons 

I paid

Pudgy and frumpy, but she was hawking shakes not herbs

Failed relationship? No, she’s actually GETTING MARRIED

She did not ask about you much other than to say I need to watch my figure for you (see bullet point no. 3)

Mary was called ‘that woman’ six times before I stopped counting

She asked for money as a wedding present 

So, you didn’t get them all, but not a bad showing. Love you. Talk tomorrow on Facetime. x

03/07 @ 6:09am

God kid, I’m so sorry. She doesn’t know what she’s missing. Actually, I don’t even think she deserves to know what she’s missing. Did you talk to your dad or Mary about it? I know we’re talking later, but I just wanted you to have a message from me before you start your day. What’re you wearing to the office tomorrow? Have you worn that wrap dress lately? You know it’s one of my favorites and that I always love unwrapping it when you get home from the office. 

Can’t wait to see you tonight. All my love, Bradley

03/07 @ 9:55am

The dress doesn’t fit. My mom was right, I shouldn’t have gotten the french toast.

I’m planning on talking to dad and Mary later today before you and I have our Facetime. I know they’ll make me feel better, much like you have my darling boy, but it still feels pretty crummy. Especially since I’m sure she’s going to have wonderful time in New York with my brother 🙄 and I’ll have to hear all about it next time I talk to him. 

And I’m not sure if I’ve unpacked that dress yet! I’ll have to do some digging. Talk soon! x

03/10 @ 3:26am

We had a little baby. He was always giggling and laughing and we were making silly faces and he looked so small in your arms, Bradley. So small and little and he was ours. And then I turned around and he was toddling around the house and we were chasing him and his little legs were moving so quickly and we all wound up on the couch in a tangle of limbs, giggling under the blankets as we tickled him and he called you daddy. 

It wasn’t our house - or what will be our house, I guess? Instead of the leather couch you have, it was white and big and wide and the three of us could easily fit on it, snuggled together. 

And I could feel your arms around me, rocking me back and forth. I could feel you humming in my ear and kissing my neck and telling me you loved me. I could feel it. I could feel you. I could feel him and you. And it was nice and I felt warm and safe and cherished and loved. Because I felt so much love for this little boy in my arms - the perfect mix of me and you. Everything felt right and perfect. 

Except when I rolled over in bed to tell you about it, I realized I was alone in my bed, in my apartment, and not in the house that we shared or with the little boy that looked so much like you and I haven’t felt so empty and sad since I can’t remember when. 

And I just miss you so much, Bradley. I know I can come across as glib and unfeeling sometimes and like this doesn’t affect me as much. But it does and sometimes I feel like my heart is going to burst because I’ve never felt like this for anyone else before? It’s never been so easy for me to love someone and let them love me to the point that I always want to be beside them. And I know with your job - and mine - that can’t always happen, but god Bradley I wish you were here right now so you could hold me and tell me you loved me because I just want to feel your arms around me and know you’re real. I want to tell you about the little boy - the perfect mix of me and you. 

I love you rocketman x

03/11 @ 12:49pm

I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. I realize that’s a lot to drop on you, especially since we can’t talk in person. I guess I’ve just never missed a person more in my life and seeing that future showed me what we could have when you come home. God, Bradley I want you to come home so badly. I want you to stay here with me forever and never leave and to have that cute little boy who was the perfect mix of me and you and to have you here in my arms every night. And I know it’s selfish of me to ask or even make you think about it, but I want you right here - in twenty seconds, not twenty years. 

How did your hop go today? x

03/11 @ 7:03pm

I have dreams like that, too. I’ll be little, but still older than I was when my dad died and we’ll be at the beach, running around, and he’ll pick me up and spin me around like I’m flying on an airplane. 

But then it’ll be me and my kid, running around and I’ll pick them up and spin them around like they’re flying on an airplane. Sometimes it’s a girl, sometimes a little boy. But I always just can feel and tell that I love them and I’d do anything for them. 

And I used to hate waking up alone after I had them and I’d feel empty and sad and like I had the feeling that they should still be there? Except now I have you and I know it doesn’t just have to be a dream?

Sorry it took me so long to reply. Today was hectic and I didn’t get to check my email until later. But if I checked it earlier, my day would’ve been a lot easier on my heart. 

All my love,

Your Bradley

03/12 @ 7:11pm

How do you always know exactly what to say? I’m sorry for springing that all on you, know it wasn’t exactly a quick/easy message, but I love that you knew exactly what I meant. My day’s always a lot easier on my heart when I hear from you, too. Love you x

03/13 @ 10:17pm

i miss having you around to take care of me. and telling me what to do and what to wear for you and how you want me and where you want me and when you want me and and and. and how good i feel around you as you come, how you take what’s yours. how i need you to take control and tell me what i need because i’m too much of a dumb slut to figure it out on my own. i need you so much bradley. and it’s so hard because i’m trying to take care of myself like you do and imagine what you’d do if you were with me right now. but i’m so frustrated since no one takes care of me like you do. i feel so empty. nothing stretches me out like you do, nothing makes me feel as small as you do, nothing makes me flush like the sound of your voice against my neck as i come, nothing soothes the ache inside me like you do. need you to call me good girl, pretty girl, sweet girl, anything as long as it’s yours. 

i need you i need you i need you i need you bradley bradley bradley bradley

3/13 @ 10:39pm

Awwww sweetheart, did you get yourself all worked up over me? It’s okay, I know it’s hard for you all by yourself. Must’ve been real bad for you to risk this getting flagged, huh? Poor thing, don’t worry, I’ll take care of you. 

Want you to pretend I’m next to you, leaning over you as you lay down and touch yourself. Say yes Bradley, more Bradley. Bradley, Bradley, Bradley. Good girl. 

Want you naked under the covers, no frilly little pajama set or anything. No, I want your cum to stain the sheets and then for you to have to clean up in the morning, all embarrassed because you did this. You made yourself like this because you can’t control yourself without me around. All that cum being wasted. Nobody around to lick it off your pussy. So what doesn’t get on the sheets, you have to taste. Good girl. 

Want you to use your fingers - only your fingers, I’ll know if you use anything else. Start with your breasts. Think of how perfectly they fit in my hands and how yours aren’t quite the same. They aren’t as big. Aren’t as strong. Play with your nipples, drag your nails across the soft skin on the underside of your breasts.

Want you to sigh my name as you slide your hands down your stomach towards your pretty little pussy. Have you shaved? Gotten a wax? You know how I like it, want it just like that when I get home. Pretend it’s my fingers sliding into your cunt. A few touches and you’re already clenching on air and I’m not even around. 

In and out, in and out. Circle your clit with your thumb. Add another finger, then another. You rocking your hips yet? I know you’re soaked. I know you want more. Three fingers can’t stretch you out nearly as much as you need. But I don’t know if you can handle anything else without me around. And I know you would never disagree with me, right? Because you’re my good girl and good girls do what they’re told. 

Don’t hesitate to get loud. You’re in our house, in our bed, you can be as loud as you want. Bet you’re getting close, huh? Try and last a little longer, can you hear yourself and how wet you are? Are you shaking yet? I know you’re close. Go ahead, speed up your fingers, just the way I do. It’s okay, you can come. Know you’re gonna get sleepy soon, wish I could sleep inside you, nice and tight.

Now say thank you Bradley. Good girl. 

03/14 @ 5:49pm

Thank you, Bradley. Thank you for taking care of me last night 

You like chicken piccata, right?

03/14 @ 7:33pm

Yeah, kid, I like chicken piccata. 

03/14 @ 7:39pm

Okay, that’s good. I’m going to make it when you come home. I ran it by my cooking instructor. Ina’s recipe of course. 

(I’ve read your email seven times since you sent it. I’ve thought about it constantly. I want you to take me softly and slowly that first time. But after that? I can’t wait to let go and float. Love you so much x)

03/15 @ 6:09am

You’re the boss. Good thing I’ll be home soon, you’re gonna run out of material. As is, I had to type that last one with one hand. 

Love you,

B

03/15 @ 7:21am

I’ll be good till you get home, promise. 

Have a good day, do you think we’ll get to talk much from now till Friday? Love you x

03/15 @ 7:24am

I’ll hold you to it. 

I don’t think so, might be able to send one out before leaving the boat. Better make it a good one. 

All my love

Your Bradley 

03/15 @ 7:25am

You got it! Love you bubs 

03/18 @ 11:08pm

Kid - there’s this lyric that keeps running through my head: ‘and I want you right here.’ I want you beside me - today, tomorrow, all my days. I want you right here, beside me forever. In twenty seconds, not twenty years. See you tomorrow.

All my love,

Your Bradley

03/18 @ 11:11pm

See you tomorrow, rocketman. I’ll be the one in blue.

Love you x

a/n: thanks for reading! i'll be back with part ii and part iii (hopefully not in...4 months). i had so much fun writing these and getting to explore a different format and side to their relationship! thanks to alexa @sometimesanalice, kylie @ofstoriesandstardust, cass @notroosterbradshaw, elle @dissonannce, nik @cherrycola27, and loren @heartsofminds for all the support!

[weepynymph]

Gilmore girls boyfriend ranking (these are my opinions you are allowed to disagree but like don’t yell at me please I’m fragile)

1. Dave (my beloved has never done anything wrong in his life ever)

2. Jess (he screws up A LOT but he gains points for s6 and for being my little meow meow)

3. Morey (he serenades his wife daily, need I say more?)

4. Kirk (10/10 devotion will not even LOOK at another woman even if it mean crossing the street with his eyes closed)

5. Luke (I love him he waited EIGHT YEARS for her but he loses points for s6/7)

6. Richard (he screws up sometimes but he’s Emily’s no.1 fan devoted 4 life they’re made for each other)

7. Max (good guy had rizz but just not The Guy unfortunately)

8. Alex (it’s billy burke the only reason he’s not higher is we barely see him but he is good vibes and like the only guy we see get on with lorelai’s friends)

9. Jason (funny but not The Guy, plus kinda a snob. I like Jason though he’s entertaining, even if the idea of him and Lorelai actually having sex does not compute in my brain AT ALL)

10. Jamie (he was sweet and kinda deserved better tbh still a little boring)

11. Doyle (devoted and entertaining but a little boring at times - I wanted more for Paris)

12. Marty (we all know a Marty and I hate to say it but I think he’d be a terrible boyfriend and a bad kisser)

13. Jackson (mad points lost for lying about having a vasectomy that was not cool man)

14. Henry (he bailed on lane - fool)

15. Logan (I’m sorry but he loses SO MANY points for gaslighting those scenes trigger me so hard)

16. Tristan (he loses points for actual harassment but at least he’s mildly complex)

17. Zach (I hate him)

18. Christopher (no)

19. Dean (the hardest no)

20. Asher (die)

I’ve probably forgotten someone I made this in a fever dream like four months ago and decided to post it on a whim lol

[2rats1gogh]

although i REALLY like the cast of HotD I can’t help but criticize the fact that they all are a little off for their canonical ages.

And it creates A LOT of problems.

Whenever I look at Olivia as Alicent my brain just cannot comprehend the fact that she is supposed to be the mother of Aegon, Aemond and Helaena. She looks like their older sister. I get that they were trying to go for the effect that “she was too young when she had her children” which is valid but still, she looks five years older than them at best. She is supposed to be almost 20 YEARS older than Aemond, yet in some shots of them together he looks like he’s older than her. It just makes it not really believable.

Rhaenyra is also supposed to be much much older than her siblings, yet they all also look just like three years apart. They don’t look like a woman in her mid to late thirties fighting with a man in his early twenties which is what it should’ve been. It takes away the drama and puts them on the same level.

Ewan Mitchell is amazing as Aemond but he looks so so much older than the actor who plays Luke. During Storm’s End, like many people have said, it actually looks like a grown ass man chasing a small kid, when the characters are supposed to be like four to five years apart. Where Luke is believable as a 14 year old, Aemond absolutely does NOT look 19.

Rhaenyra and Daemon also look fairly the same age because obviously there was no Daemon recast. They did a good job to make Paddy (Viserys) age throughout the years, but they kinda forgot to make Daemon age as well. And therefore Matt Smith looks the exact same in ep 1 and in ep 10, even tho these two episodes are like AT LEAST 20 years apart?? Matt Smith was in his early forties when they were filming, but by the end of season 1 Daemon is literally supposed to be in his mid to late fifties. The fact that Emma and Matt look around the same age, maybe having a 5 year age gap max, makes many people forget that they are two fully different generations of people, being around 20 years apart in the show, and hypothetically could’ve been father and daughter.

And obviously Laena. Other people have already talked about this, but I also find it super weird that the show tried to convince us that Laena went from (1) to (2) in like, i don’t know, two years maybe? And then after a timeskip of only like one decade, she suddenly looks like she aged 20 years? The actress is literally older than Emma, and Laena is supposed to be younger than Rhaenyra.

It just doesn’t make sense to me. I don’t really have a problem with changing some of the characters’ ages, but you have to consider casting the right actors as well. They did a fairly good job when adapting Game of Thrones, because they kinda aged up everyone and kept the same actors without having any timeskips. The only exceptions are probably characters like Brienne, because although I LOVE Gwendoline Christie, Brienne should’ve been a literal teenager.

[f0point5]

https://www.express.co.uk/sport/f1-autosport/1968263/george-russell-mercedes-f1-mexican-grand-prix/amp

So 19/20 drivers vote to change rules immediately - how much do we want to bet that Max is the one who didn’t want change immediately but wait until 2025 🤣

I’m not even sure why this needed to be news because all it’s going to do is fuel the narrative that Max isn’t a good sportsman or team player. But there’s legit 4 races left so I can see both sides what’s the harm in waiting until next season? All it’s going to do in introducing new rules is make a mess of things honestly especially since they’re not always consistent with the current rules.

I don’t really understand the narrative around this because it was for sure Max who disagreed but Max also probably cares the least about it. The rule looks how it looks now because of him, so it’s not like he doesn’t know how to race any other way. They’ll change it and he’ll drive to the letter of the new rule. It’s actually the other drivers who are more likely to have trouble adapting.

I presume the reason he would have gone against it is because he’s argue that one incident isn’t enough of a reason to change the rule mid season. Which is fair. This is a rule that all 20 drivers have “understood” all season, but suddenly Max is involved and they’re all crying that they need clarification or a change. I, too, would be like, “you’re literally only asking because it’s me who got away with it this time”.

FIA says it’s too late in the season to investigate mclaren’s front wing bending more than Simone biles but it’s not too late in the season to change the way overtaking happens?

[wanderingmind867]

Honestly, Octavian feels relatable. In his own way, he's really relatable. The implication from hazel that he has no friends that he didn't bribe into being his friend… that hurts. I don't know if it's nearly as depressing as me (a person who's turning 20 in February with no friends besides my dad), but it's probably pretty close.

Also, Octavian clearly has hyperfixations on roman history and on prophecies and auguries. He's clearly passionate about what he does, he took the earliest opportunity when percy meets him to begin discussing his famous namesake, the great Gaius Octavius, Augustus Caesar. He's just relatable. Way Moreso than Luke was. I can actually see elements of myself in Octavian, the same way I can see elements of myself in characters like Leo, Tyson, Piper, Nico, Grover, etc.

Speaking of roman history, Augustus Caesar lived to be an old man. Octavian dies when he's like 18 or 19, max. If that isn't irony of the worst sort, i don't know what is. Poor Octavian deserved better and Luke deserved worse. If Luke at least got redemption in death, Octavian should've gotten the same treatment.

[kneesheee]

50 Things to Know about the Disney-verse

1. Ursula and Maleficent are rivals so Uma and Mal being rivals also tracks.

2. The Evil Queen and Maleficent are rivals for Hades' affections and for the status of "The Evilest of Them All'.

3. The Evil Queen claims not to be Hades' girlfriend, but they just had "an interesting weekend" on Castaway Cay. And therefore, I headcanon that she is Hadie’s mom. Probably conceived sometime around Evie’s banishment.

4. In the Disney Villains: Top Secret Files, Maleficent is featured in her own section. According to the pieces of information provided, Maleficent's last name is Faery.

5. She was actually invited to Aurora's birth ceremony and that the invitation simply never got to her castle because she burnt the postman to death (believing him to be a trespasser) before he could deliver it.

6. Her dragon form also appeared in The Little Mermaid series episode "Heroes" as a sea dragon.

7. Captain Hook tried to charm her, only to be zapped away leaving behind his hook. Jafar also tried to woo her while they sat together, only to end up being literally burnt.

8. It was revealed in "A Christmas Cruella" that she did want a puppy before becoming her villainous self.

9. Cruella has a brother named Cecil and a niece named Ivy. However, Cecil is not Ivy's father, meaning that Cruella and Cecil must have another sibling (most likely a brother) who is Ivy's parent.

10. In 102 Dalmatians: Puppies to the Rescue, Cruella has set up a toy factory next to DeVil Manor. She seems to have tried online dating, where she has supposedly wed herself to Professor Farzboom, a meek professor who helps her make her toys. So there’s Carlos’ dad.

11. In "Max's Embarrassing Date", she went on a date with the Beast and asked if he came in a medium, which the Beast became annoyed of. After the Beast gets soaked with soup he was eating, Cruella is unhappy as she would have to get him dry-cleaned.

12. Walt Disney's early vision for The Rescuers revolved around the kidnapping of a polar bear from a city zoo; writers considered reusing Cruella as the main antagonist (presumably driven by her desire for the bear's fur).

13. The concept art of the film shows Cruella wearing an outfit made out of crocodile leather. Because The Rescuers was set more than a decade after 101 Dalmatians, Cruella was given a period-appropriate update. Aside from her '70s alligator-chic outfit, Cruella is accessorized with Sly and the Family Stone-style sunglasses. In other sketches, De Vil is depicted in bell-bottom pants and a pair of platforms. Other concept art showed Cruella driving a water vehicle similar to the one Medusa uses in the final film.

14. The Prince is usually known as Prince Charming, though some source material shows that his name is Henri, or Henry. However, he was never referred to by name anywhere in the film. Not even mentioned as "Prince Charming".

15. The story takes place roughly in June. In the movie, the sun rises slightly before 6:00 AM (in France), as it would within a few weeks of the summer solstice. Also, by this time, a pumpkin would have grown to 20–40 pounds.

16. The debate of the setting of Cinderella has always been a problem, but most people can agree it is French; however, there is a small amount of people who think it is Spanish because the female names end in "A" but that does not really cut it so deeper research shows that the thing on Anastasia's head is a peineta or headdress used in Spain along with formal attire also the French furnishings and the Spanish furnishings within the same time period are very similar in style.

17. Cinderella is the “oldest” princess in the official franchise being 19 while Snow White is the youngest being 14. Also, Snow White’s prince was suppose to be 18 according to Disney’s records.

18. In the third movie, Cinderella’s shoe size is mentioned to be a size 4½ in women's. According to Disney's Villains' Revenge, Snow White has smaller feet than Cinderella.

19. Cinderella was actually rich at the beginning, even before she married the prince. This was exempted, however, as she was forced to work as a servant.

20. In some stories, Cinderella's real name was Ella (short for Eleanor), and because she would always lie in cinders, her stepfamily would call her CinderElla. However, in the Disney film, "Cinderella" is truly her name by birth.

21. Cinderella's last name would likely have been Tremaine since her stepmother's name was Lady Tremaine unless Lady Tremaine kept her maiden name.

22. According to Disneystrology, Cinderella’s birthday is September 6.

23. According to the Disneystrology book, Snow White’s birthday would be on March 6.

24. Cinderella is magical. She has a special ability to empathize with animals, perceive what they say and communicate with them.

25. Melody is the very first human-merperson hybrid in history, making her birth a significant historic moment in both human and Atlantican history.

26.She is also not considered a canon descendant’s character and considered to be from an AU, but apparently, Beauty & The Beast, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, and The Little Mermaid are considered to be happening roughly around the same time in the disney timeline.

26. Melody's bedroom is Ariel's guest room when she first took human form and stayed with Prince Eric, albeit recolored with brighter colors.

27. Contrary to popular belief, Jasmine's age has never been confirmed or even referenced in any of the Aladdin movies, television series, or other spinoff projects. In the original film, the Sultan declares that Jasmine must be married "by her next birthday", but never specifies how old she will become on said birthday.

28. An early story concept for the original film had the Sultan saying, "Jasmine, the law says you must be married by your sixteenth birthday.", which would have made her fifteen years old. This concept was scrapped when Jeffrey Katzenberg became worried about sending the wrong message regarding the idea that fifteen year old girls can get married. Thus, the line was changed to "married to a prince by your next birthday.", leaving Jasmine's canonical age unknown.

29. One of the Disney Princess magazines has a story about two of Jasmine's cousins named Farah and Nadine. Whether they are considered canon is unknown.

30. Although the exact date is not clear, Jasmine's birthday is in late January or early February. This is because when Aladdin and Jasmine fly on the magic carpet, Chinese New Year is being celebrated over in China. This holiday can fall anywhere from January 21 to February 20.

31. She also has another cousin named Sharma who teaches at The Royal Academy.

32. Nasira is the better sorcerer between her and her twin brother, Jafar.

33. According to Disneystrology, Tiana’s birthday would be on December 25, Christmas Day.

34. The trailer implies that Gaston may have been aware of the Beast's curse, and had ulterior motives besides wanting Belle as his wife for attempting to kill the Beast, as the trailer described him as being "one man who wants to keep the spell alive," although it is unconfirmed whether this was the case in the film itself.

35. Despite various concept materials, as listed above, give Gaston the surname of LeGume, the Bimbettes during the song of "Belle" refer to Gaston as "Monsieur Gaston" and Belle in the reprise twice sarcastically refers to herself as "Madame Gaston" suggesting that Gaston is his surname in the final version.

36. The Bimbettes (individual names Claudette, Laurette, and Paulette) are blonde identical triplets who fawn over Gaston. They are inspired by Belle's sisters from the original Beauty and the Beast fairy tale.

37. They are the first Disney characters to possess green eyes without being villains

38. These girls worked their asses off in the comics to get Gaston to notice them. 😩

39. Its implied in one comic that Belle and Gaston were friends when they were children.

40. Ironically, despite Belle being considered by the village to be the most beautiful woman in the village, Laurette once disguised herself as Belle flawlessly enough to fool Gaston initially, which conflicted with the claim that Belle's looks had no parallel.

41. Even though he is referred to as a prince in the opening, none of the characters directly refer to him by that title. In addition, the first draft for Woolverton's take of the film indicated that the Beast was intended to be a duke instead of a prince.

42. According to the first stained-glass window featured in the film's opening sequence, Adam’s family motto is "vincit qui se vincit" (meaning "The winner is who wins himself").

42. Though the Beast's official age is not mentioned in the movie, it is strongly indicated by the narrator's statement that the rose "would bloom until his 21st year." As the rose has already begun to wilt by the time Belle arrives at the castle, it is very likely that the Beast is 20 years (i.e. on their 21st year) of age by this point.

43. In authorized supplementary comics, most notably The New Adventures of Beauty and the Beast, the Prince is never shown as being older than a preteen when he's shown as a human; moreover, the palace staff all refer to his pre-curse self as "a young boy" or "child". Two individual comics show that the Prince was originally a few years older than Chip, who didn't age during the curse, and shows him as being a couple of years older than Belle herself. The comics also show that the Prince has had a few run-ins with the disguised Enchantress, meaning that he'd still be a preteen when he was cursed.

44. Despite her slim figure, Belle seems to have considerable strength. She may have lifted the Beast, as evidenced by the Beast being placed onto Philippe's back, although this was never shown on-screen. Later on, she was able to pull the Beast up onto a balcony.

45. Belle is currently the only official Disney Princess to have hazel eyes.

46. In the beginning of the original 1989 storyline, found on the Diamond Edition DVD, Belle's birthday is celebrated, and the cake reads "Happy 17th Birthday Belle", providing evidence that she is 17 in the movie, or at least that she was originally planned to be 17.

47. Contrary to popular belief, it's not made clear whether Belle was actually born a peasant, as she implies that she wasn't born in her home village in the opening song, but rather moved there. In addition, her owning books at her cottage implied that she is, or at least was, considerably wealthy (as back in the time period of the film, books were considerably expensive).

48. In the musical, specifically the song "No Matter What" one of the lyrics had Maurice stating "You are your mother's daughter; therefore you are class ... crème de la crème", implying that Belle was part of the social upper class. This was also supported by Belle having a portrait of her and her mom in the Enchanted Tales of Belle attraction.

49. In earlier drafts, Aladdin had three human friends named Babkak, Omar, and Kassim.

50. In the episode "Two to Tangle", it's revealed that Aladdin has unexplored magic powers hidden within his soul. This may possibly be a link to him being "The Diamond In The Rough".

[stevesbipanic]

Under the Tree

Finally my contribution for @thefreakandthehair spicy six winter challenge. This was a lot of fun, my prompt was “Um, I got you something.” / “You got me something?” Hope you enjoy!

The first Christmas after the defeat of Vecna was an important one. It was the first Christmas that they didn’t have to worry about seeing flickering lights or brandishing weapons. The kids could be kids, and the adults could be too.

Steve Harrington could count on one hand the number of good Christmas’ he could remember. He assumed that the Christmas’ before he was 5 were adequate enough, but, the year he turned 5 he remembers his mother baking gingerbread with him and his dad playing basketball with him out on the driveway Christmas morning. They never would again. When he was 19, he spent Christmas with the Buckley’s. It was a warm Christmas filled with love and laughter; one he’ll treasure forever. This year, age 20, Steve hopes to add another good Christmas to his collection.

Joyce insisted on hosting, and no one was going to tell her no. After all, the Hopper-Byers now lived in a beautiful house just on the edge of the woods, you could bike to Hopper’s old cabin which had now been turned into a sort of club house for the kids, Hellfire was regularly held there now that Eddie had graduated. Steve had spent all of November getting gifts for his family, not his parents, he hadn’t heard from them since they sold the house and moved to Washington after the earthquake. No, his real family, he spent weeks making sure everyone got the perfect gift. He had had to hide Robin’s gift at Dustin’s now that he shared an apartment with her and was quite the snoop, not that Steve minded, he liked how intertwined their lives were. He had thought of hiding it at Nancy’s new place, but she had become less tight-lipped about secrets since her and Robin had gotten together.

That was another new thing, Robin and Nancy, the two who fell together so perfectly after everything that happened. Steve was the least surprised, when they told him he’d claimed it made sense due to him having great taste in women, they knew he was joking. Steve knew because he could see how well the two of the complimented each other. Nancy was patient and happy to listen and let Robin work through a problem by rambling. Robin was supportive but tough when it came to both Nancy’s goals but also her health. They had both taken gap years to revaluate their goals and desires while also taking a well-deserved break. The future could wait another year for them to have time to heal hidden wounds.

Steve was glad there was no bad blood between them and Jonathan, they’d all repaired their relationships over the years, figuring out platonic and romantic loves and wants, Steve could call Jonathan his brother (he was suspicious that Joyce had filled out adoption papers somewhere) and let old demons lie. With Jonathan had come Argyle, someone Steve didn’t know how the party went so long without. Argyle was a steadying presence, reminding them that they’re not defined by what happened to them and telling deep truths, usually high but the fact still stood. Steve was glad the two of them had each other, he could see years of emotional weight be lifted off Jon’s shoulders whenever Argyle was around.

Even the kids had matured, and not just in the way that trauma matures someone. Steve could see them let go of childish desires like the first love romance between Mike and El that grew into more a relationship like Steve and Nancy, stronger as friends. Dustin still called Suzie every weekend but Steve knew they both had a good head on their shoulders, he liked to think any kid that came from them would probably solve all the world’s problems in a day. Lucas and Max had worked so much on their communication, understanding each other’s needs now more than ever.

Maybe it’s why Steve had spent so long making sure they all had the perfect gift. A small part of Steve that still held doubt, a grain of doubt so rooted inside of him from childhood that it may never leave. The part of him that worried about being forgotten and left behind, the part of him that drove him to always be useful. He’d gotten high with Eddie in the first week of December and poured his heart out to him about it, Eddie hadn’t said anything in reply, he hadn’t needed to, Steve could see in his eyes they shared the same fears.

Eddie’s gift had been the most important, for reasons Steve could only confront in the safety of his own apartment, huddled under blankets with Robin late at night. Reasons that simultaneously made him feel whole and completely exposed. In the end the gift had been a mixtape, a perfect blend of their music tastes woven together with Steve telling Eddie about how the songs make him feel, about life, about Eddie, ending with his final confession. Steve hopes he doesn’t hear it until he gets home.

The party is in full swing, it had snowed the night before leaving plenty of soft snow to play in, distracting the kids from asking about presents until after dinner. They had all gathered around the tree, slowly but surely passing out gifts. Hugs and thanks were shared amongst the group, Steve felt his heart fill with warmth with every piece of gratitude or handmade card sent his way. Eddie’s eyes had twinkled when he’d read the tape’s description as being “Eddie’s Mix”, a promise for later dancing across his features. Paper picked up and clothes changed, the kids had settled in front of the television with mattress’ pulled from every room. Joyce and Hopper had retired with promises of making breakfast in the morning. The remaining two couples had either joined the kids or disappeared for their own festive celebration, leaving only Eddie and Steve finishing the dishes in the kitchen.

“So, a mix tape, Stevie? Do I have to worry about an hour long “Last Christmas” brainwashing?”

Steve had laughed putting away the last plate, Eddie had come over to help wrap presents and Steve’s record had gotten caught on the same track, they both nearly lost their minds.

“I can’t promise no Wham! but I think Last Christmas has had enough of a turn this year, Eds.”

Eddie smiled and took the edge of Steve’s sweater in his hands, grabbing a blanket and leading Steve out onto the porch. The two boys sat in the cold, huddled together under the blanket, listening to the quiet of the woods. The quiet brought them so much peace, no calls for help, no creatures to go bump in the night, just them and their heartbeats.

“Um, I got you something.”

“You got me something?” 

Eddie chuckled, “Of course I did, sweetheart, just didn’t want to put it with the rest of the gifts, didn’t think it would fit.”

Steve raised an eyebrow at this, “What is it?”

Eddie looked nervous now, slowly he pulled off one of his rings, it was one of the simpler ones. Steve always thought it stood out against the skulls and horror of the others. A small black stone set in silver, vines slicing through the metal. Eddie took Steve’s hand and slid the ring onto his finger.

“You always play with this one when you’re upset about something, figured it’d be better if you had it even when I wasn’t around.”

Steve felt seen, Eddie had comforted him through a lot after March, offering words and touch and even his ring to make Steve feel better.

“Eddie. Thank you.”

“Of course, Stevie.”

“But wait, how couldn’t this fit under the tree?”

“Well, there’s a second part to it, if you want it.”

Steve had missed many things in his life, but he didn’t miss the question in Eddie’s eyes.

“I’d really like the rest of my gift, Eddie.”

Eddie leant in slowly, still giving Steve the opportunity to move away, to say no, to leave Eddie behind. Steve didn’t though, he was never going to leave Eddie behind, would never forget him. Their lips touched, cold from the night air, and it felt like the final puzzle slotting into place. Eventually, they pulled away, just enough to catch their breath, foreheads still touching.

“Yeah, you would’ve looked weird with a bow on your head under the tree.”

“Maybe next year I’ll do it just for you.”

Steve smiled, he couldn’t wait for next year, and every year after that he got to spend with Eddie.

[kats-bullshit]

Watching Brazil gp 2016

and my comments (mostly just me crying over Max and a lot of emojis, don't expect any wheel knowledge)

Max looks so young 😭

can't believe it, they're actually praising Max 🤯

GP sounds exactly the same 😂

6 laps and the safety car is still there, when will the fun begin? 😔

Toto looks so fucking young wtf

why is Max as VES on the timesheet instead of VER? (oh, apparently someone else had VER (reverse driver?))

intermediates with so much water still? Seems like a bad idea

the new timesheet is so much better, you can't see shit on the old one

Sebastian! That looked scary!

brocedes trading the fastest lap. I wish I'd watched their fight live 😔

Max going into pitlane when Ericsson was there looked terrifying from far away, but from the onboard, it looked quite controlled from Max's side

Horner and Magnussen's radio at the same time, congratulations, I didn't hear either of them 😒

safety car again

KIMI NOOO

safety car again 🥲

hearing Sebastian being a bitch (rightfully of course), I wish I watched him race and be a menace live

red flag, stupid rain

wow, Carlos, you don't have to look so good, chill

young Max again 😭

another crash, I wonder if they'll drive the whole race or finish earlier

"he is very much letting Nico Rosberg know he's there" Max being Nico's nightmare is so funny to me 😂

Max looks like when you're trying to pass some a very slow-walking person on the pavement. left, right, left, right 😂

and another red flag. I should've just watched the highlights 😭

IS THAT CHARLES

Daniel ☹️

this is the worst race to watch today, I don't have the patience for this today

I'm going to take my dogs on a walk and the race will probably still be red-flagged

we're racing again, I wonder for how long (lap 29/71)

I'm literally only watching this race for that one Max's overtake on Rosberg, how long till I'll finally see it 😭

Perez in 4th so weird, who would have thought he can do that

MAX VERSTAPPEN OVERTAKING NICO ROSBERG

"What confidence! The boy just goes and finds grip everywhere else! Okay, you're going there, I'll just go somewhere else then and see how it is out there! Absolutely brilliant"

"Get in there Maxy" 😭

I've seen everything I needed 😂

Fastest lap for Max. Little truck terror at the age of 19 stressing brocedes

SHIT MAX almost crashed! Kept it on the track beautifully, but Rosberg on his ass now! He kept the second! Looks to me like Max feels way more confident in the rain than Rosberg

Max's driving looked so calm during that almost crash. I'm always in awe of how the driver can keep calm in that speed

Max 5th again bc of the pitstop :/ and again intermediates when a heavy rain is supposed to come?

one thing didn't change, drivers screaming about being pushed from the track

imagine if Nico crashed, he would kiss that championship goodbye

and we've got another crash and safety car, yay 😒 just 20 laps to go, pls

RedBull just trading intermediates and wet like socks

Max in the pits again. I wonder how the race will end, max in 16th and 23 minutes till the end of the race.

nvm, Max in 13th 🤣

The 3 RedBulls in a row looked so cool

Max in the points!

"One word to describe Max: relaxed" "He's outrageous" "it's a textbook lesson on how to drive in the rain" the commentators are praising Max so much 😭 bring this energy back, I want to hear it in 2024 😭

Daniel and Max match each other's freak fr

what the fuck did they do to the cars now, people just casually are gaining 11 positions and now they barely overtaking 😕 or maybe it's the track, ig I'll see when Brazil happens this year

so Max just pushed Sebastian off the track and no one is screaming and calling for his murder?? They were amused by the thought of the talk whether Sebastian was ahead or not?? what is going on 🤯

RedBull loves Max so much 😭

Max is on the fucking podium from 16th and he is getting praise from everyone 😭

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

I think the reason people are so determined to make Chrissy younger than she is, is because of her size. As someone who is small and has a baby face it's fucking annoying when people do that, when people treat you like a child. Stop it. She's 18. Eddie is around 19 or 20. He isn't 21 or 22, so stop trying to make him older than he is. They went to middle school together. Joseph Quinn and Grace Van Dien have repeatedly said that they probably would have gotten together. If you don't like the ship, say you don't like it. I am saying this softly. You don't have to make up a reason for not liking it. In fact, you don't have to give a reason. Say you don't like it and move on. Or don't say anything at all. If the ship isn't gross, then don't try to make someone feel bad about it. If you want to get pissed about a ship. . .THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO SHIP MAX AND STEVE. . .RISE UP.

[chussyracing]

Mexico 2024, fp3 notes 💫

Max is first out on track to make up for lost time yesterday

Pierre went off into the grass like yesterday

Charles locked up and aborted his first lap on softs, then went p2 behind Carlos on another (+0.064s)

Double YF: Liam spun under the stadium section, he waited for people to drive by and then returned back on driving line

Oscar complained about Carlos in his way saying "typical carlos" on the radio

Nico went p6 on mediums with a nice lap, being faster then Oscar and both Red Bulls on softs so far

Charles went p1 with yellow s1 and s2, and a purple s3 hmm

Okay there seems to be a mistake in the graphics probably since Carlos went p1 with three yellow sectors (which logically shouldn't be possible)

Ferrari only won here twice: in 1970 and 1990 (god help us)

Lando went wide in T7

Ale just fell on his butt and made a sommersault when waving charles out of the garage, he is okay and charles commented it with "bello questo" 🤌🇮🇹

Lando is running flow vis under his sidepod as the only mclaren driver with the upgraded floor this race weekend

Nico has been complaining about his brakes a lot today and he just got told how to try and make it better on the radio to which he responded ayayayay

Franco asked to check up on the floor after taking a kerb too aggressively

Lewis complained about how fast mcl are

Charles is losing quite a margin in the middle sector but he has a great s1

Oscar went off into the grass

Mcl was 3 tenths faster than rest of the world in quali runs and 2 tenths faster than rest of the world in low speed turn

Results: 1 Pia, 2 Nor, 3 Sai, 4 Ver, 5 Ham, 6 Lec, 7 Tsu, 8 Rus, 9 Mag, 10 Law, 11 Alb, 12 Bot, 13 Col, 14 Per, 15 Alo, 16 Hul, 17 Str, 18 Oco, 19 Zho, 20 Gas

[pettyrevenge-base]

Make my life difficult for nearly a decade, I'll make you look like an idiot.

When I first left home to go to university, my parents co-signed a mortgage for me on an apartment style condominium in a small Canadian city. This was 20 years ago, so it came in at a whopping $52,000. They thought that this was a much better and economical choice than trying to find an apartment and deal with landlords. I loved the idea and moved into my new home.

The building was almost entirely populated by the 65+ crowd. It was small and only had 24 units split into 2 halves. I had a basement condo. It was a nice place, nothing fancy, but amazing for a student. I was young (19) but I was quiet, kept to myself and didn't do the whole party thing.

I got along with most of my neighbors, I'd help them out moving heavy things or carrying groceries upstairs. I was acutely aware of the age gap and the general image of a university student, so I made sure to be just an all around great guy to avoid conflict.

The one person I could never see eye to eye with was my upstairs neighbor. For a 70 year old woman that couldn't have weighed more than 100lbs, she walked like a damned elephant. She'd have gospel music on her TV at max volume at 5am on Sundays, she'd make remarks about "that damn kid" whenever something was left out of place. She even went so far as to accusing me of breaking into her car and making a police statement saying she saw me do it. Unfortunately for her, I was out of the country on an internship at the time, but still she persisted being a pain in my ass. I'd tried to approach her about the TV issue, and her response was to make sure that it was no longer just Sunday. After a couple of years of attempted diplomacy, it was clear that nothing I did would make things better.

Others in the building probably knew she had it out for me, but why would this adorable little old lady try to lie and get me thrown out of the building by the condo board? (She tried at least 11 times while I lived there).

7 years into my time living there, I was at my job with an Ambulance service just north of the city. I got called to a shooting. Guy shot his neighbor in a land dispute. The neighbor survived, but there was of course going to be a police investigation. The investigating officers called me to get a statement and offered to just come over to do it, rather than have me travel. One of them was a constable I'd worked with quite a bit, so I said sure. We set a time for about an hour after I'd get home from work.

I was just getting out of the shower when they buzzed to get into the building, I said "come in, I'll be out in a second". I hit the door buzzer and quickly grabbed some pants and a shirt. I heard them come in, and then walk upstairs. As I'm trying to throw on clothes, I hear them knock....on my upstairs neighbors door. They introduce themselves as being from RCMP Major Crimes division and that they were looking for me...balls. She says "oh, he lives downstairs, what do you want with him?". They thanked her and informed her that they couldn't say, as it was an active investigation. My heart sank....but then I had a thought.

It only took about 15 minutes to do my statement and they went on their way. And then the fun began. I knew the rumour mill would be starting. She would tell everyone that would listen that Major Crimes was looking for me and that I must be some sort of criminal. I decided to see where this went. Pretty soon I'm getting side eye in the hallway, neighbors are steering clear of me, so I know she's been talking. Turns out I've been arrested for robbery and kidnapping and must be out on bail according to her.

I found this out when one of my neighbors who was on the condo board showed up with a letter demanding an explanation and threats to have me kicked out. I asked him what this was all about, and he said "Well, Linda (not her name) sent us a letter about what had happened and we had to have an emergency board meeting because people don't feel safe with you here". I said that per the by-laws of the condo board, before any action could be taken, I could request a meeting to review and provide a defense. Linda was on the board, so I know she'd be there. They set a date for a week from then, but I was given a caution that it didn't look good for me and that I would have to do a lot of explaining.

The meeting day comes. Linda is sitting smugly looking at me, the other board members are giving me dirty looks. The board president asks what I have to say in my defence. I stand and quietly distribute a letter on RCMP letterhead, signed by the regional superintendent that says"Mr. Zenmedic is not under suspicion of any crimes, past or current and has not been arrested, detained or questioned as a suspect in any criminal matter. His duties as a Paramedic will often require him to make statements in regards to ongoing investigations, and in this instance on (date), investigators had gone to obtain a statement about an ongoing investigation for which he was professionally involved. At no time did the members discuss, disclose or in any way indicate that he had any involvement in any wrongdoings. I am deeply saddened by the necessity of this letter and we will be reopening an investigation into a previous incident regarding false statements made against him".

You could tell when people read and understood it. The dirty looks shifted from me to Linda. She exclaimed that it must be a forgery, she witnessed me being led off in handcuffs. She pleaded that they should believe her. It didn't help her. I stood and addressed the board and outlined the years of abuse and harassment, including the false accusation of break and enter to a vehicle. I informed the board that on advice of my lawyer that I do not discuss the matter further with any member of the board, as Linda being part of it and using her position for the purposes of harassment opened the board as a whole to litigation and I was still weighing my options.

The next day I had a knock on my door. The board president had informed me that Linda was removed from the board and that she was given warning about her conduct and that any further harassment could result in proceedings to have her removed from the building.

She also had a visit from police with a summons for providing a false statement and obstructing a peace officer. She had to attend court. She pled guilty to both and was given a suspended sentence and 1 year condition not to harass, threaten or intentionally inconvenience me in any way. If she abided her conditions, she would receive an absolute discharge (meaning it would be removed from her record, like it never happened).

I moved to another province before her year was up, but for a brief period of time, I actually got to sleep in on Sunday mornings.

Source: reddit.com/r/pettyrevenge

[babyrdie]

I know it's kind of pointless looking for a specific chronology in Greek mythology, especially using different versions, but I still find it kind of funny how Patroclus' age really confuses me.

Helen already had a daughter (Hermione) when she was taken by Paris and that child was 9 years old when this happened (Library, E.3.3)

Clytemnestra and Helen are either twins or at least close in age according to traditions.

By Homer, Clytemnestra had 3 daughters (Laodice, Chrysotemis and Iphinassa) and 1 son (the youngest Orestes). All the daughters were old enough to get married (The Iliad, IX, 169-178). If we consider versions with Iphigenia and Electra, then at least the first-born Iphigenia was old enough to marry in Aulis since there was a false marriage with Achilles (Iphigenia at Aulis, Cypria frag 1, Dictys Cretenses 20)

Female marriageable ages vary in Ancient Greece, the oldest source we have on the subject is Hesiod (Archaic Era), who suggests that it is recommended to marry a woman of around eighteen years of age. Sources from the Classical Era give different ages, the average generally being 14/15 years old, although in Sparta they generally married older probably at least 18 years old (see here).

So let's consider that Clytemnestra and Helen married at eighteen, since that is the theorized age for Sparta in the Classical Era and the Archaic Era source we have (Hesiod) gives the same age.

In an attempt to make Helen's age as young as possible, I'm going to assume that she had Hermione in the first year of her marriage. So 18 (marriageable age) + 9 (Hermione's age when Helen was taken), Helen would have been at least 27 when Paris took her. We add another 10 years of the Trojan War, so Helen has at least 37 in the last year of the war.

Clytemnestra's daughters would probably follow the Mycenaean coming of age, having been born and raised there. Unfortunately, I don't know what the Mycenaean female marriage age was. If we consider the sources with Iphigenia, Achilles was around 15 years old (Library, E.3.16) and Iphigenia was around the same age. So let's assume Chrysothemis, Laodice and Iphinassa were at least 15 years old each. Let's also consider that they were close in age to reduce Clytemnestra's age. Idk 15, 16 and 17 years old, something like that. It would be possible, after all taking the 10 years from the Trojan War, that would make them between 5-7 years old when Helen was kidnapped. Anyway, the oldest daughter could at most be 19 years old to match Hermione, and thus the ages of Clytemnestra and Helen match. So yeah, Clytemnestra at least 37 too.

If Helen is 37 years old in the tenth year of the Trojan War and married at 18, then the suitors thing was 19 years before the Trojan War.

If Achilles was about 15 when he joined Agamemnon's army, then he was about 25 when he died (because +10 years of Trojan War). That is, he's about 12 years younger than Helen.

Patroclus is older than Achilles (The Iliad, XI, 938-940). But they grew up together, so the difference shouldn't be much (The Iliad, XIII, 100-110). Maybe min 2 and max 4 years older? That is, Patroclus was between 27-29 years old when he died maybe.

Considering Patroclus was 27 because I think 2 years makes more sense with the idea of growing up together, then Patroclus is 10 years younger than Helen. Even if we consider 29, he's 8 years younger than Helen.

Patroclus was among Helen's suitors (Library, 3.10.8; Description of Greece, 3.24.10; Fabulae, 81).

If Helen was 18 and Patroclus is 10 years younger than her, he was 8 years old. If Patroclus is 8 years younger than her, then he was 10 years old. The male age for marriage was DEFINITELY not that.

It makes me wonder if this happened because:

A case of divergent chronology because there area lot of versions of the myths;

He was just there to see what Helen was like and who her other suitors were. After all, it was a meeting with the most beautiful woman in the world and certainly a bunch of impressive suitors;

In the rarest hope, perhaps the possibility of an engagement until he is of age. Neptolemus is at least 9 years younger than Hermione and we know he married her.

[neonponders]

Part 34 for @wrecked-fuse ‘s pocketverse 💤

Part 33 (main plot)

Part 31 & 32 (werewolf!Billy chapters haha)

( pt. 7′s art 🎩 ) ( pt. 9′s art 👀 ) ( pt. 14′s art 💨 ) ( pt. 19′s art 🦇 ) ( pt. 20′s art 🍳) ( pt. 27’s art 🦦 )

~ on ao3 ~

• • •

Chrissy won poker, but little Billy and Steve couldn’t be mad at her. Even when small Billy crossed his arms, and Chrissy held out her pinkie finger for a sportsmanship handshake. “Thanks for playing with me, Billy.”

He rolled his eyes at her, but took her fingertip in his hands. “Verwy impressive.”

She grinned and focused on the bigger one. “Could you give us a ride?”

Billy tilted his head for her to follow as he carried the leftover food inside. “Sure.”

Steve dumped the Barbie pool water over the grass and said, “Hug goodbye. You’ll see each other soon.”

“Tomowwow?” small Steve asked eagerly, looking between Steve and Chrissy.

The latter gave it some thought. “Maybe. Eddie and I need to sort through our schedules. I’ve got cheer camp soon.”

Steve perked up. “I forgot about that. I figured Eddie’s shows would be a sooner thing.”

“That too,” Chrissy agreed, but made Steve stop what he was doing by hugging around his middle. “Thanks for today. You really saved me.”

“Aw, no problem. My house never closed to you. We just got busy surviving Geometry.”

Chrissy laughed, “Yeah,” while their littles followed suit.

“Bye, Chwissy,” small Steve chimed as he hugged her. He laughed as Eddie overlapped them, all wings and arms. “Biwwy! Come here!”

“I wanna be in the middlwe,” small Billy declared like a supreme ultimatum. His turquoise eyes shot wide as Steve, Chrissy, and Eddie surrounded him. His expression melted into bewildered, happy confusion.

Chrissy opened her hands on the table for her littles to climb on, and soon Billy, Max, and Chrissy were heading out. Robin stayed to have dinner with Steve, and it was then that small Billy looked up from his spaghetti pieces. “Is big Biwwy coming back?”

Steve gave that some thought, realizing that they hadn’t discussed it. “I don’t know. We’ll see him tomorrow, probably.”

Little Steve’s head fell back in a great impression of Max when she’s annoyed. “Tomowwow’s so far! ”

Robin consoled, “You won’t notice time passing when you’re asleep.”

Big Steve agreed, “You should be more concerned with all the lotion I’m about to put on you after swimming for so long.”

“I don’t wanna be slimy!” Billy cried. Robin peeked at Steve with a smirk, enjoying getting to see how he handled this. But it wasn’t Steve’s first week, rodeo, or bedtime. He had a song ready to get little Billy and Steve in the mood for bedtime and all that it entailed.

The song was “Sweet Transvestite” from Rocky Horror Picture Show.

“Steve,” Robin called flatly from his bedroom doorframe. She could hear little Billy singing along in his en suite bathroom. “Explain.”

Steve angled himself out of the bathroom to shrug a shoulder at her. “He likes the guitar. And, you know, the ‘makin’ a man with blond hair,’ lyric.”

“Not that,” her eyes rolled. “I mean the fact that you showed them Rocky Horror without me.”

“When I have night shifts alone, musicals are the best thing for them,” he finished, turning off the bathroom light and letting his hands be a diving platform for the littles to jump onto his bed. It was the most energy Robin had seen from little Billy outside of jazzercise: swinging his fists and throwing his hips with the music.

“Is it a good thing for them to be doing this much before bed?”

“Sometimes high highs make for low lows that sleep through the night.”

Robin nodded slowly, not too sure about that but then she concluded, “A drive should knock ‘em right out. Come on.”

“You’re not just staying over?”

“I’ve got the morning shift,” she lamented, but swapped to a lighter note, “and Heather said she’d drive me.”

“Oh?” Steve puckered his lips in dramatic interest. His jaw slid to the side as if he tasted something delicious. “Heather?”

“Shut up. We’re driving with the windows down.”

The littles cried a gleeful, “Woo!” at that and stood in her pockets as Steve drove her home. They didn’t get to say goodnight to her, though, since they fell asleep about halfway there. Robin and Steve carefully transferred them to the belly of the otter plushie on his lap, and Steve wished her a good time with Heather.

“I highly doubt it’s like that,” she refuted from outside the passenger door.

“Eh, you never know until you know,” he sang back at her.

She grimaced at him. “Why are you being weird all of a sudden?”

Steve shut his trap and shook his head. “No reason. I’ll leave once you’re inside.”

Robin rolled her eyes at his manly chivalry and waved at him once she had opened her front door. Steve didn’t have it in him to tell Robin about Heather’s fearlessness at parties to kiss girls during Spin the Bottle, but he had confidence that Robin - or Heather - could break that ice on their own.

Besides, a bigger issue arrived in the form of little Steve starting to make sounds in his sleep. Big Steve held the otter tighter to his belly as he turned into his driveway -

“Stevie?” little Billy worried sleepily.

“I hear him. We’re home now. Hold onto him.”

“I am.”

“Good job, buddy. Let’s get you guys inside and in bed.”

Steve tried to keep his pace level as he unlocked his house and locked it behind him. A part of him hoped that the rocking of his steps might help his little to relax, but Billy gazed up at him with fearful eyes. “He’s having a nightmawre. He’s dweaming without me.”

Steve frowned at that as he turned on his bedside lamp, but he didn’t have time to think about it. Billy followed his hands inside their shoebox bedroom as Steve carefully put his little on his bed. “He’s not alone out here. If we can wake him up gently, he’ll be able to go back to sleep without bad dreams.”

Billy exclaimed, “Gentwy? He’s awone! Stevie, wake up!”

“Hey, hey,” Steve tried to curtail without setting Billy off too. “If you dream together, then what makes Steve happy? What makes his brain go fuzzy?”

“Fuzzy?” Billy puzzled.

“Anything. What changes his brain in a good way?”

Billy glowed like an actual lightbulb had gone off behind his eyes. “When you brwush his hairw. And big Biwwy’s water on his face, he wikes the smell o’that.”

Steve gazed flatly at him. Billy’s water....I don’t have his cologne -

“Oh,” he realized aloud, and went into his bathroom. A person didn’t put cologne on their face. He found the skincare Billy usually left out from Steve’s drawers. The bottle was just a simple toner, but it had the faintest spa, floral fragrance. Very unlike Billy’s usual masculine tendencies, but it made sense that little Steve would recognize it from being in Billy’s shirt. That might have been why Billy used it in the first place: a nonintrusive smell for the little guys.

Steve put a couple drops on his fingertips and touched them to the bed underneath little Steve’s pillow, infusing the sheets with the fragrance before his hand holding his smallest comb made the fragrance waft over the little one.

Small Steve’s features were pinched over whatever he was experiencing in his dream, but his brows lifted from the tingly sensation of the comb brushing his hair. Small Billy stood by, holding his hand, until big Steve encouraged, “You can touch his hair. We like it.”

Billy looked up at him for reassurance. Then he reached a hand over Steve’s ear, carefully pushing the brown hair back. For how much work big Steve put into his hair, he certainly didn’t like people touching it during the day.

But at night...nothing put Steve to sleep faster. Someone’s nails dragging across his scalp, stimulating his follicles by moving his hair in messy directions, the trust proximity.

Little Steve’s eyes started to blink while closed, and then he rolled over onto his back. Little Billy gasped, reaching up for the comb to control it more than Steve’s large hand. He kept a loose hold on it so Billy could brush through little Steve’s arching fringe. “Wake up, Stevie. Don’t dweam without me.”

The little one whined another sound, but far from distressed, it sounded simply annoyed. “Mm I wan-hmsff.”

Billy looked up at big Steve. “What did he say?”

The latter smiled. “I just think he’s out of the dream and trying to answer you. I’ve been told I talk in my sleep too.”

Little Billy gasped softly, relieved and bewildered. Steve carefully took the comb back with the insurance, “Keep petting him. He likes it.”

“I know.”

Steve left him next to the little one’s bed and worked on getting ready for sleep, himself, listening to Billy defending little Steve from his bad dreams.

“The dawphins are on tv tomowwow, Stevie. We gotta watch the dawphins. I wonder if big Stevie could make us some bwue food. The scuba drwivers - dwivers - ugh, the scarwy mermaids might be with the dawphins too. It’s fun when they play. I wike watching the fishies with you, Stevie...”

Big Steve’s lips pressed together as the little guy gushed his heart out just to help his favorite person sleep better. As Steve washed his face, brushed his teeth, and changed into something softer, Billy’s words dragged on, sentences becoming more and more broken...

“Okay, little man,” Steve breathed as he came to the bedside table. “Your turn for bed.”

“Mm’not sweepy,” he moaned on Steve’s hands. When he tried to put Billy on his bed, though, the little guy whined, “No! Don’wanna sleep.”

“Why not?” Steve humored, because Billy’s eyes were only halfway open.

“ ‘Cause Stevie’s alweady asleep. What if I get bad dweams alone?”

“Steve always wakes up for you when that happens. And he wakes me up, right?”

But Billy whined, and Steve figured this would be a while. He got onto his own bed and set Billy down on the pillow to talk to him. “What are your bad dreams?”

“I don’t remember.”

“That’s helpful.”

“So I never know what to wun from.”

“Oh,” Steve absorbed. “I guess that makes sense. But you know what to wake up to...right?”

Billy blinked slowly, muttering, “I hope so.”

“Hope is good. But you don’t need to hope all the time. I’m out here. And Stevie is out here, waiting for you. Ready and waiting for you to be a bossy butthead.”

Even as Billy laughed, a big, fat tear escaped the side of one of his eyes. Steve petted the pad of his thumb over Billy’s head. “Aw, buddy. You should’ve been in bed a while ago. You did good, looking after mini me. Can you let yourself fall asleep?”

“I don’t know.”

“I think you can. Just missing that special ingredient.”

Little Billy’s cheeks got a hint of pink to them. “Kiss?”

“Mmhm. Comin’ in.”

Steve pecked the carefullest kiss on the small forehead, only to pull back and see Billy holding up a hand. “Kiss my hand?”

“I can do that,” his voice warmed. It was more like kissing his whole arm, but it counted. Then he wiggled a finger over Billy’s tummy. “Any bubbles in there?”

Billy chuckled, eyes glassy with impending slumber. “Pwobably.”

“Oh jeez,” Steve sighed theatrically, and kissed Billy’s belly...

Billy held up a leg, foot in the air. “Kiss m’foot.”

“I’m setting a bad precedent,” Steve warned himself, but pinched the tiny ankle between his fingers, and kissed the foot that smelled like Steve’s soap and lotion. Just to be a little obnoxious, Steve used that leg to roll Billy onto his side, and kissed his body and head again. “A whole set of armor. Nothing can get you now.”

“Thank you...Stevie...” Billy blinked vacantly, before his long lashes finally rested on his cheeks.

Steve heaved a sigh. He wondered if he could get the little guy into his own bed, but his own eyes ached for the relief of sleep -

The solid sound of knocking on wood rattled his heart in his chest. Between the late hour and his fatigue, Steve would have crept downstairs with his old, nailed bat in hand.

But he had since learned the melodies that occupied big Billy’s hands.

“Hey,” he said as a question when he opened one of the front doors.

Billy sort of smiled, sort of glanced around him as if he needed the neighbor’s consent to be here. Then he seemed to have a decision behind his eyes as he looked up at him. “Can’t sleep.”

“Yeah,” Steve sighed, but through a smile. “There’s a lot of that going around.”

[youmakemyhearthowl]

Punk Princess

Ao3| Part 1| Part 2| Part 3| Part 4| Part 5 | Part 6| Part 7| Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10| Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 (Next Part)

Also please go check out THIS fan art done by @heavenlycrashes

Steve was about ready to vibrate out of his skin. He was absolutely over the moon when he woke up Friday, pulling on the Hellfire shirt Eddie had given him, and El had taken a bunch of fabric paint to, adding pastel hearts and flowers to it, mixed in with deep red and black ones. The pants he wore on the El and Max shopping trip slipped on easily, with the new patchwork pastel pink he’s sewn into a few places.  He’s got his fishnets under it, so they peek out through the massive hole on the left thigh that Dustin had said he should add and not patch for the vibes of it all.  He slips his jacket on with his vest over it and sighs.

Today, he was gonna ask Eddie out.

He was only mildly worried Eddie might say no. 

And like Steve wasn’t an idiot, alright. He knew that Eddie liked him too, knew that Eddie would say yes. But while he wasn’t stupid, Steve had learned he was a bad boyfriend. Even though he’d tried, like really tried with Nancy, to make her happy, and make sure she wasn’t alone with the guilt about Barb.

It was all just bullshit though. 

And he’s not really sure why that had hurt so bad, when Nancy and him had only dated a few months, before she went and slept with Jonathan at the end of the school year, and told Steve that everything about him was bullshit. Maybe it was because she was the first person he’d been really truly himself with, opened up to her in a way he never had, and to her the real him, was bullshit. 

He should have just let her go the first time he thought she cheated on him.

But he really had loved her.

And he’d gone off the fucking deep end after that, the bender, the bar fights, all of it, just pushed on by the fact that the first time he’d started to let his guard down he still wasn’t enough.

All this to say, he was terrified to ask Eddie out.

But he was going to do it. Today.

“You look like you’re going to throw up.” Robin chirped, slamming the car door as she climbed in. “

“I think I am probably going to throw up. Jesus Christ.” Steve leans his face on the steering wheel, “I’m gonna ask him, Buck. Today.” The fucking pitch of the squeal she lets out, turning towards him and grabbing his shoulders in each hand.

“Steve! Yes, oh thank god, I was so tired of telling people ‘no they’re just friends.’ Gareth owes me 20 bucks!” She's positively beaming at him, shaking him slightly as she babbles. “Steve, this is so big! Okay, okay how are you going to do it?” The unfiltered love, and excitement she has written all over her face makes his chest squeeze, God he loved her.

“I was gonna just…. Ask?” She pulls her hands off his arms, throwing them up in the air to emphasize her groan, scream, whatever the fuck that noise is she’s making. Steve makes a distraught noise at her in return shoving her back over towards her side of the car so he could put it in gear and start making their way towards the school.

“Steve, Steve , you have to do something like, weird and out there to ask him! It’s Eddie! I mean, you could write it in mud and he’d definitely say yes, but come on, this is months, months  in the making, Dingus!” Her hands are flying all over the place as she speaks, bouncing in her seat. “This is so good, I can not wait to rub it in Gareth’s face that you asked first!” That startles a laugh out of Steve as he pulls into the parking lot, looking over at his best friend while he puts the car in park.

“You’re gonna ruin it either way if you don’t chill out about it.” He can feel his face stretch into a smile, his anxiety pushed down in favor of the giddiness Robin is emitting around her. He reaches out and squishes her cheeks between his hands, her lips puckering slightly under the pressure, and she tries to glare at him, but the effect is, simply, not there.

“I’ve got a plan babe. He’ll lose his mind.” He smirks, placing a kiss on her forehead before releasing her face and climbing out of the car. Robin's excited energy always has a way of rubbing off on him and bringing any mood he was in, out of the gutter. He was bound and determined to hold onto that excitement and not dwell on the failed relationship of the past, when a hand lands on his shoulder just after Robin kisses his cheek goodbye before she bounds over to where Chrissy is waiting for her at her locker. 

“Steve.” 

It’s like thinking about her had somehow summoned Nancy Wheeler out of wherever she’d been the entire school year. 

His stomach clenches. 

They hadn’t spoken since the break up the day before summer break. Hadn’t even been in the same room as each other, even when picking up Mike. Mike always met him at the end of his driveway so Steve wouldn’t have to interact with her, but somehow the same day he’s finally ready to push forward and move on, her Wheeler senses tingled and there she was in all her Nancy glory.  He turns to face her, indifferent mask carefully sliding into place on his own face as their eyes meet. 

“Nancy.” He nods, tilting his head to tell her he’s not about to actively participate in this conversation unless she’s the one initiating everything. 

“I’m really worried about you Steve.” 

Steve’s muscles lock up suddenly, not really knowing what to expect from her, but definitely not her pinched smile or the judgment in her eyes. 

“And why, pray tell, is that?” God he’s been hanging out with Eddie too much, if he’s starting to talk like him too. He can feel his expression hardening from indifference to aggravation as she begins speaking again. 

“This isn’t you Steve. This whole look, and attitude you have going on. I don’t know what happened to you over the summer, and I was willing to let it slide for a while, figuring you were working through some things, but Steve what the hell is going on with you?”

Steve feels white hot anger inching into every crevice of his body, boiling around and seeping into the ache Nancy usually leaves in his chest. 

“You were willing to let me do this? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He’s vaguely aware of Robin and Chrissy making their way closer to him at his raised tone. And he’s distinctly aware he wished Eddie was here too, because Eddie calms that anger that flickers in him sometimes. Eddie, although not a calm person, always brings calm and warmth with him. 

“Steve, you look like a-”

“A what? A freak? Yeah come on Nancy you can say it. Although I didn’t hear you complaining about freaks when you cheated on me with one.” He snaps, his hands balling into fists. He doesn't really feel bad calling Jonathan that, but it still brings an uncomfortable feeling to his gut. It feels like a flash of who he used to be, but he and Jonathan have long since buried the hatchet between them, Jon explaining that Nancy had told him she was already broken up with Steve when they had slept together. He’d felt just as betrayed as Steve but was happily committed to his long distance boyfriend Argyle now, and Jon and Steve actually would meet up once a week for a smoke sesh these days.

Nancy’s looking at him like she used to when they were together and he’d messed up something he wasn’t even aware could be messed up, and Steve felt like he was going to vibrate out of his skin with anger. Nancy had no right to him, or any part of him and here she was pretending like it was okay for her to speak her mind about his new everything. She takes a slight step back, like he’d slapped her but keeps her expression level. Ever the journalist. 

“Steve, what has gotten into you. It’s like I don’t even know who you are anymore.” 

“You don’t. And frankly I’m starting to realize maybe you never really did. Save your fake worry over who I’m becoming and keep your opinions on it to yourself.” Robin is at his side then, sliding under his arm into her spot there at his side, Chrissy surprisingly on his other side, uncoiling his hand and holding it in her delicate one. 

“I happen to really like who I’m becoming and I won’t let people, won’t let you try to tell me who I am anymore. It’s all bullshit anyways isn’t it?” He finishes, the anger gone at the contact of his friends, just a cool bored tone seeping back into his voice. 

And that’s the thing isn’t it? Nancy never really did know him. Sure, he’d been softer and kinder with her, hopelessly romantic and in love, but she was only ever wrapped up in her own desire to act out, which is why she’d dated resident party boy King Steve to begin with. She wanted to rebel and show people she wasn’t who they thought she was, so she only saw Steve as exactly who everyone else did, no amount of anything he had done was going to change that. And when Barb died, Nancy was so understandably wrapped up in the pain of that loss, she stopped giving a shit about anyone else’s feelings or anyone else really at all.

“Actually,” he starts as Nancy goes to turn around and walk away, “Thanks for doing this today. It helped settle some things in me that I needed to realize so I could move forward.” He tossed the last part over his shoulder as he wrapped his free arm around Chrissy’s shoulders and tucked her into his other side, making their way towards where the Hellfire club usually bumbled along in the mornings. 

“Steve, I’m so proud of you.” Robin smiles, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “I know how hard that must have been” 

“You know what Robs, I’m really proud of me too. I realized a lot of things from all that. And honestly can I just reiterate to you how thankful I am for your friendship over the last year.” He places a kiss on her temple before turning to Chrissy. “And that totally wasn’t your battle, but thank you for the support and comfort you offered. It helped a ton.” He hesitates for a second before he just decides fuck it and places a kiss to her temple as well. Chrissy giggles at the soft affection.

“Us ex.preps gotta stick together Steve.” Her face takes on a serious look, nodding to herself before continuing, “Speaking of, let’s meet up sometime this weekend, Hellfire and us, I wanna pick your brain about some things.” Robin beams at the other girl and Steve chuckles softly. He’s way better off now then he ever was before. 

And Yeah, sure, he was still terrified he was going to fuck everything up with Eddie. But the fact of the matter was he liked Eddie, and he wanted to be happy, and with his two girls under each arm he felt like for once, maybe he deserved that.

—

Originally, Steve was going to ask Eddie out first thing that morning, but Robin was right, Eddie deserved something more than a simple ask and he was bound and determined to make this perfect. It had been hard to not just blurt it out when Eddie had wrapped around his back like an octopus at the lockers, but he’d held his tongue because this needed to be perfect. He was so excited, he’d skipped his first few classes of the day, sneaking over to the middle school to hopefully corral his gremlins to offer him some help on his quest. 

Oh man he was calling it a quest now, he’d really been falling into the nerd herd with the rest of his favorite people. Not that he was complaining really, DnD although hard for him to really follow still sometimes, was one of his favorite things of the week, whether it was watching Eddie walk the kids through their campaign, or playing in the one on Fridays at Hellfire. 

And DnD was important to the people he loved, and it was an integral part of Eddie, so he knew a general idea of what he wanted to do with this ask, but he also knew he’d need the kids' help to really nail it down. 

He hoisted himself over the fence at the back of the middle school, over to where he knew the kids usually hung out when they were ditching class or if they had a free period. Usually, the little dorks didn’t skip classes often, unless it was gym or history, and lucky for Steve that was the first two classes of Dustin’s day today, so he was perched casually on the swing set over here, a DnD manual open on his lap, while he hurriedly wrote notes down into his notebook.  Steve smirked to himself, sneaking up behind him silently, and sucking in a deep breath ready to yell in the younger boy's ear, when Dustin let out a dramatic sigh.

“Steve, those boots are like a negative 12 to your stealth.” Steve blows out the breath he’d taken in, loudly groaning as he throws himself onto the swing next to his sudo little brother.

“I’m great at being sneaky, these boots make like no noise.”

“Well then maybe it's all the metal on your clothing I heard.” Dustin beams over at him, shoving his notebook into the DnD manual to hold his place in the text. “Or the metal in your face, Jesus, when did you get a nose ring Steve?” Steve’s hand instinctively goes up to his nose, touching the hoop gingerly. 

“I’ve had it for a while now, I got it the same time as the rest, I’d just lost my hoop for it and have been wearing the one that makes it look like a freckle. Not my fault, no one noticed it.” Dustins rolls his eyes as Steve speaks, twisting the swing he’s on back and forth. “Also you really shouldn’t be skipping class right now.”

“You’re one to talk!” Steve snorts, ruffling the hat on top of the younger boy's head.

“Yea okay that’s fair, and really I shouldn’t complain too much, cause if you weren’t here I wouldn't be able to ask for your help.” Steve turns in the swing, planting his feet to hold it in place facing Dustin, and Dustin mimics his exact movement. Steve braces himself for whatever reaction his next sentence it’s going to get outta the younger boy. 

“I need to find a nerd way to ask Eddie out.” He watches as the words sink in, Dustin’s eyes growing wider until he’s throwing himself off the swing and bouncing up and down on his feet.

“Fuck yes! I knew it! Although Lucas and Max were pretty sure you’ve been dating for months now. Oh this is so good. Yes!” Dustin’s practically sprinting around in circles in his excitement, pulling a loud happy laugh from Steve as he watches.

“So you guys are okay with it?”

“Okay with it? Steve! Me, Will, El and Max have been basically planning your wedding to Eddie since like January.” Dustin’s smile is toothless and happy, and so, so young, it sort of hits Steve again that these kids are like 14. Fuck, it’s so nice to see Dustin act his age. Steve lets out another bark of laughter, motioning for Dustin to come and sit back down.

“Alright, alright, well if you ever want it to get that far, I need your help on how to ask him out.”

“Oh I have the perfect idea!” Dustin lisps out, throwing himself back into the swing. “It’s a great way for you to not have to make all the choices, cause I know you kinda hate that, but that's sorta the whole point of asking someone on a date you planned right?” He spins the swing around and around as he’s talking, all excited energy. “But, The Party we have a great way to plan our hang outs! And it involves rolling a D20, so Eddie’s gonna looove that.” Steve’s just listening, a large smile over taking his face at the fact that not only do the kids seem to support this, but that Dustin is so ready to help, it makes Steve’s heart feel warm in his chest. These kids mean everything to him, and to know he means that much back its a little overwhelming, but in the best fucking way possible. 

“So basically, what I think you can do is, write a list of places to eat, places to hang after or before, and outfits to wear! Then have Eddie roll the D20 and whatever number it lands on is what you’ll do! That way, Eddie is still a part of the picking places process, but it’s still your date to plan!” Dustin lets the swing unravel from where he’d twisted it all up, spinning quickly round and round in circles. Steve watches with amusement, as Dustin tries to get his bearings again after spinning so much before he continues talking.

“Steve, seriously, this is the best news. Eddie is a super cool dude, and he seems to make you really happy. I’m like, ecstatic that this is happening.” Like a fawn trying to walk, Dustin stands on wobbly legs before throwing himself into Steve’s arms. 

“I still have dibs on being your best friend though.”

“That’s Robin.” Dustin groans at his response.

“Then I’m your brother, which means you’re stuck with me for life . And I get to be the best man at the wedding.” Steve’s pretty sure the entire middle school could hear his responding laughter.

[wanderingmind867]

Honestly, Octavian feels relatable. In his own way, he's really relatable. The implication from hazel that he has no friends that he didn't bribe into being his friend… that hurts. I don't know if it's nearly as depressing as me (a person who's turning 20 in February with no friends besides my dad), but it's probably pretty close.

Also, Octavian clearly has hyperfixations on roman history and on prophecies and auguries. He's clearly passionate about what he does, he took the earliest opportunity when percy meets him to begin discussing his famous namesake, the great Gaius Octavius, Augustus Caesar. He's just relatable. Way Moreso than Luke was. I can actually see elements of myself in Octavian, the same way I can see elements of myself in characters like Leo, Tyson, Piper, Nico, Grover, etc.

Speaking of roman history, Augustus Caesar lived to be an old man. Octavian dies when he's like 18 or 19, max. If that isn't irony of the worst sort, i don't know what is. Poor Octavian deserved better and Luke deserved worse. If Luke at least got redemption in death, Octavian should've gotten the same treatment.