#he spends years paying for a mistake he made when he just wanted to feel loved. he is an adult desensitized to it all and exhausted | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mooishbeam · 2 months ago

Text

『♡』 Country Honey

♡ featuring: ranchhand!toji x richgirl!reader

♡ synopsis: a spoiled, wealthy college senior is forced to spend her summer at her father’s rural farm as punishment for her reckless behavior and slipping academic performance. unbeknownst to her, a bigger storm awaits just around the corner.

♡ wc: 16.5k+ (AHHHHHH)

♡ cw/tw: afab!reader, enemies to lovers if you squint, hurt/comfort kinda sad toji, feral toji, spanking, overstimulation, edging, sadism/masochism, throat fucking, cock worship, m/f receiving, doggy style, degradation kink, brat taming, dumbification, reader is a spoiled brat a lot of the time

notes: oh god, where do i begin...i know ive been gone for so long. firstly i want to apologize, and secondly ill explain my absence in a second post. not proofread so i apologize, honestly i shouldnt have tried a long fic for my comeback bc it took way too long to finish, but either way i hope you all enjoy! art by moonlessoul on ig! comments and reblogs are appreciated ♡

“Almost there.”

The sleek luxury car your dad drives grumbles at a rocky pace over an evidently gravelly road. If you can even call it a road—rather the patchy fragments of flattened dirt eroded by heavy traffic from a forgotten time. It’s a path shrouded by southern live oak, canopying its leaves and spearing sharp rays of summer daylight through the sunroof.

You’re feeling every second of this bumpy ride. The wheels hop over an unsteady rock and your knees jab into your sternum. You’re pressed into an unfortunate position, with your legs pinched to your chest and the bright pink suitcase you insisted on bringing sandwiching you to the leather seat. You struggle to wiggle to a decent side that spares your sweltering face from the sun, but the other seats are also occupied with your luggage. And the front seat. And the trunk.

Maybe that’s why you were brought here in the first place. You’re well off to a sickening amount and you’ve made no efforts to conceal your wealth. Your dad sacrificed his golden years to foster an agricultural business in the rural south, and now you reap the rewards of his labor. You know it and spend it as such. You’ve collected a textbook of names throughout the years—spoiled, bratty, coddled, pompous—each insult savored more than the last. You embraced being a spoiled rich girl and all it had to offer. Top notch schools, waitlisted parties, designer bags, and just about any opportunity you could get your greedy hands on.

High school left like the wind and before you knew it, the 4.0 extracurricular weapon you used to be devolved into a nightlife college senior, more invested in the extravagant yacht parties than your academic probation. It was a risky misstep, but you didn’t have the heart to care when your dad could easily pay your way to graduation. At this rate you’d be a couple years behind your peers. Your dad wasn’t having any of it.

The festivities stopped. No unlimited debit card and especially no spending. This could possibly be your final senior summer, and instead of celebrating with friends you’re making up for your transgressions. The worst part is the rural retreat he’s currently driving you to with no sign of civilization for miles.

You could die right now.

“How much longer?” You drawl on the last syllable, flicking your phone on and off in hopes that a bar or two will magically appear in the top right. He glances at you through the rearview mirror, a tinge of southern, "Just a few more minutes.”

You let you phone fall from your limp hand and lean your head against the open window. Nothing but ancient trees and the occasional berry bush. You’re not sure if you should be more upset by the consequences of your actions or the actual actions that roped you into this mess. Instead of ruminating on your mistakes, you allow your eyelids to droop in the oppressive warmth.

“We’re here darling.” Your eyes shoot open. So soon, and surely not after the forest you’d been traversing moments ago. You’re able to scoot up more, the sound of stone-pathed roads rattling in your ears. You tuck your knees underneath you and lift yourself up now that the terrain was smoother, poking your torso out the window. A bane of light strikes you immediately, and you blink away its brilliance to reveal crystal blue skies.

Your mouth shapes an ‘O’, and you push your designer glasses over your forehead. “...No way” you gawk, taken by the view your father cultivated.

This is nothing like the previous tunnel, and certainly nothing like the skyscrapers you’ve grown accustomed to. It’s an endless expanse disrupted by stone and crowded with overgrown wheat, bobbing in the mild breeze. They travel up the winding hill, ducking under wooden fences to border the farmhouse. The two-story ivory home exudes simplicity, strung with hanging pothos that wrap around the spacious porch and decorative shuttered windows painted like strawberries. From your limited view you notice the large red wooden barn peeking out behind the house, and a dirt trail leading to productive areas; a small stable, cattle, and other farm animals coexist in a sector made for their comfort. Beside the home is the largest Magnolia tree you’ve ever seen, with branches extending over the pitched, fabled roof and overhanging eaves with sweeping petals. It’s purposefully overgrown and homely, a humble size incomparable to the mansion you were raised in.

Your father pulls up to the oak gate with a tattered sign overhead: Welcome to Pleasantview Farms.

The lack of security, never mind the lack of extravagance, is astonishing to you. It’s unexpected of your father—the man that required you have a designated butler all throughout secondary school. “You never told me about all this” you yell from outside the window, still gazing at distant rolling hills of dewy grass. “You never asked” he chuckles, and turns onto another hill leading up to the house. You look beneath you; patches of flowering weeds fighting their way past the pavement.

He parks in an open plot half occupied by a wheelbarrow, packed to the brim with haybales. “We’re here.” He turns the car off and steps out to open your side. Your luggage slams onto the dirt before you do, and you yelp.

“No, it’s gonna get dirty!” He laughs and brushes specs of soil off your precious bag. “And if it does, you’ll be alright pumpkin.” You groan and attempt to get out without sacrificing your hot pink slides, when your first foot gives into silt. You scream and stumble onto dry earth, leaving your phone behind to *splat* in the mud. You kick off the mud barely clinging to your shoes until you catch a glimpse of your glittery phone charm on the floor. It takes you a second to process the mud-covered device slowly descending, but when your brain synapses finally link, you expel an ear-shattering shriek. To which your dad stifles a smile at the dramatic performance.

He picks it up and wipes the debris on his ivory shirt. “One more reason for you not to have it” he says and tucks it away in his pocket while you’re struck with a permanent look of horror.

The front door swings open, and you turn to see a thin older woman. Slightly older than your father, her face is gentle and creased with living. Her hair fades from light gray to dark brown at the very tips, tied neatly into a bun with a coiled band. She removes her pale-yellow gloves and stuffs them into the back pocket of her bleached trousers, jogging up to you. “Good afternoon, Annie” he smiles, and she stretches a wide grin that nearly shuts her eyes. “Hello, sir. Is everything alright?”

“Yup, just kids being kids” he snickers and plants both hands on either side of your shoulders. “This is my daughter.”

“Good afternoon” you meek, devastated and contemplating the status of your phone. She audibly gasps and grabs your hands, and you jolt. “You’re even more beautiful in person. I’ve heard so much about you.” It’s like she’s studying your face with the way she gazes into your eyes, to which they fall onto your cheeks and hair. You’re not one to shy away from flattery, but the direct compliments spread embarrassment across your ears.

“Keep her company while I get these from the car, will you? Maybe show her around.” She nods, and leads you on an impromptu tour through the house.

“There isn’t much to see ‘round here, but I’ll try to make it interestin’ for ya” she jokes. The entryway is quaint, keeping nothing but rubber boots covered in dirt and farming tools used for today’s workload. “This where we keep what we need for today. S’just better to pick it up from the front.” You nod.

Further in, the hallways are decorated with baby pictures of you at various photoshoots. On the left side, she shows you a pastel green kitchen embellished with colorful floral paintings above the handles. Annie talks with her hands, “This is my domain. Damn near painted the whole thing. Took a lot of convincin’, but I got it eventually.”

“Do you live here?” you questioned. “We all do!”

“All?”

“Mhm”, she hums, “Me, Terrace, Lionel, and...” she trails off at the end. You’re surprised that they’re living where they work, and even more surprised that she’s all smiles while doing it. “Do you...like living here?”

“Of course! Pays well, lots'a vacation time, and everything’s compensated.” You tilt your head slightly, “Where do you guys' sleep?”

“We got our own place out back, all of us. Sweet deal, huh?” she says, patting your back. “And who was the other person that works here?” you ask.

Annie waves off the idea, stating “You don’t have to worry ‘bout him, he’s not really the talkin’ type.”

Perhaps it was her bluntness or her motherly cadence, but you quickly became comfortable with her presence dragging you around like a lost puppy. She showed you the living room that appeared to be vomited on by all things antique and vintage, and the bathroom tiled an ugly orange pattern. She led you outside, where a garden blossoming with peonies and hibiscus was trimmed carefully to adorn the pebbled path and fit around the barn. Far-out past the back gate you saw what you assumed was their living quarters, separated from miles of tillage.

By the time she finished her grand tour, you made it upstairs together to regroup with your dad. The second floor was reserved for your bedrooms and attached bathrooms. Entering your room, there’s nothing special about it. It seems like your dad attempted to buy things similar to your style, but couldn’t quite figure it out. You weren’t expecting much of anything considering this was your first—and most likely last—time being here, but it’s truly mediocre. “Whaddaya think pumpkin?”

“I love it” you choke out a lie and plop onto the red plaid bedding. Your luggage is lined up by the dresser, and you have quite the unpacking session awaiting you. Annie leans on the doorway. “I’ll let ya get settled in. We can do more in the morning.” Your dad leaves with her, and when you’re left alone stewing in the reality, you fall back onto the comforter.

One day is entertaining, you’d even call it an enjoyable experience. But the entire summer? You spend the rest of the day emptying out suitcase after suitcase, and turn in under the heavy blankets starving off a midnight chill.

You’re up before the crack of dawn, contemplating what you’ll wear as if that matters while you’re shoveling shit and carrying chicken feed. You throw on something impractical either way—a plaid button up tied to crop, tight denim shorts, and a brand new pair of shiny cowboy boots you just couldn’t resist buying when the trip was announced. You stomp your way to the back porch and are immediately hit with the bittersweet scent of humid pastures and last night’s rain within the tepid wind. It’s utterly quiet besides the distant echo of cattle and pigs, cicadas humming an airy tune. Your eyes latch onto the barn, slightly parted with a dim light going on the inside.

You recall what Annie said to you during the tour when you asked what’s in the barn: “I suggest you leave it alone, nothin’ worth lookin’ at in there.” Her clear avoidance intrigued you, and the more she dodges actual answers the more curious you become. You tread carefully on the path so you don’t alert whoever or whatever’s inside. As you plant one weightless foot over the other, you stop.

A deep, gritty voice; thick like the bark of an ancient redwood. He grunts then *chop*, followed by something solid rolling on a prickly surface. Another thick groan and another *chop*. You get closer to the barn and slide across it, practically dragging yourself against Annie’s wishes.

*Chop*

You clutch the side of the parted door.

*Chop*

You peak your head in. The two story barn houses an array of soils and tools used for farming on the bottom, and clumps of hay piled high at the top.

The older man with a mop of inky hair hangs his head low, honed in on the objective beneath him. The sharp end of the axe steadies above his head, then cuts through the air as it lands deep within the stump. He goes for another swing, beads of sweat meandering between his pecs, down the carved muscle of his abdominal and disappearing below his chiseled v-line. He digs his thick calloused fingers into the crevice and splits it. It’s as if his physique was crafted by careful hands, weaving marble like silk only Roman gods could mimic.

Your entirely distracted by the unexpected scene before you when the silence is cut by a clatter. His breaths are sharp and purposeful as he kicks it off the stand and trudges to the uncut pile of logs. You watch him with wandering eyes, taking mental notes of scars hiding underneath the fine hair spread across his torso. This isn’t the grumpy old man you imagined when Annie spoke so brazenly about him.

He hasn’t glanced at you once, despite standing right in front of the post he’s chopping on. It’s slightly aggravating. You’ve never had to ask for anyone’s attention before. You bathed in wealth, just enough to make even the snobbiest trust-fund kid turn his head. He must be blind. So, you wait until he comes to his senses, tapping your foot with your arms crossed over your chest.

And you do that...for a while. More than a few minutes pass, and you’re still standing here. You stir in the silence and methodical chopping, feeling flustered at how needy you look waiting for a man's response. A piece of wood—more important than you? Impossible. In a last-ditch attempt, you clear your throat rather dramatically. Nothing. A log rolls by your foot and the older man walks up to you only to kneel down and grab the wood before going back to his task. Heat creeps onto your cheeks. Are you fucking kidding me?

“Are you hard of hearing, mister?” you finally ask, batting your eyelashes at him. It’s a deep contrast to the irritation boiling in your stomach, so much so you have to choke back the vulgar words bubbling at the surface. He glimpses you with frosted olive eyes and swings the axe over his head. In a mild country accent he replies, “No.”

“...Oh.” You’re struck with palpable quiet once again. You’re fixed to the floor, struggling with something to say that doesn’t start with ‘fuck you’. As you’re about to open your mouth, he speaks.

“Heard ya the first time. If ya wanna talk, use your words.” You stare in utter disbelief. Was it audacity or straight stupidity? You can’t imagine anyone disrespecting their employer’s child, let alone commanding them.

“Excuse me?” He tosses the last log in the pile.

“Hm? Should I do it in a way you’ll understand?” he brings his fist to his lips, clearing his throat as you did. There’s a glint through that frost, the twinkle of an obvious shit-stirrer. You’re pissed no doubt, but the corner of your lip twitches at a challenge.

The most important tool to a wealthy family is humility. You can’t be too self-centered or prideful to strangers, dropping hints of sugary kindness as to not sour your perception. Perception is truly everything. Even so, the flowered words you’ve been taught to wield with grace wilt at the sight of him.

“Oh, so it’s gonna be like that, huh?” You scoff, plopping down on the stump. He wipes his dirt-dusted hands on the back of his overalls, straps dangling at his thighs. “Not sure what ya mean.”

“From what I’m getting, you’re a grumpy asshole. That description sound correct?”

“‘M only an ass when trust-fund kids call me like I'm a dog.”

“You know, the way Annie talks about you I thought you’d be some geriatric old man on his death bed! Turns out you’ve still got a couple more months in you—congrats!”

He laughs, “‘Preciate it. If I’m correct you must be papa’s spoiled little brat from the big city?”

“Mhm. Don’t worry, this was your first offense so I’ll let it slide. Remember to get on your knees when you apologize.” He pretends to ponder the idea, “Think I’ll pass. You can pick up one ‘o them bags up though and bring ‘er up to the field.”

You pause for a second, blinking. Instantly you double over with snorting laughter, the kind that tints your face and gathers tears at your lashes. You’re even clutching your stomach from how funny it is. When you come up from your fit, he’s there with his arms crossed under his chest. That’s when you realize he wasn’t joking by any means. You gape in disbelief, a chuckle still caught in your throat.

“Wait…you’re serious?” He walks over to one of the sacks and tosses it at your feet. “Well, get to work. I’ll show ya where to put it.” You purse your lips when a giggle slips, “Do you really think that’s gonna happen? Must be the age catching up with your brain.”

“I think it is gonna happen cause yer in my area. If you wanna be here, you’re gonna work. Nothin’s free ‘round these parts.” You hop off the stump and stand in front of him. Unfortunately, your attempt to size him up fails as your crane your neck to meet his gaze. “You can’t make me do anything. In fact, this is my property, and you’re here to do your job. So go do it” you terse.

“Nah, that’s not how this works. You’re on the farm now, not some bullshit country club you go to on weekends. Take yer ass to that bag and pick it up.”

You feign a pout, “Isn’t a pretty girl in your presence enough hard work already?”

“Not when she has so much mouth. The pretty ones know how to shut up.”

“I wouldn’t have so much mouth if you didn’t back talk.” He gets in close, only inches away from your face.

“Either go pick flowers, whatever girly shit you do, or do what I tell you to do.”

“I’ll tell my dad you’re forcing me into manual labor.”

“Aww, go ahead” he mocks with a smirk. He walks towards the door, wrapped in golden sunlight. Curious, you try tugging on the sack and nearly face-plant over the weight of it. There’s no way he expects you to carry it on your own. He turns back around, laced with mirth.

“By the way, name’s Toji. Welcome home, sweetheart.”

“Go do it yourself since you’re so good at it! You egotistical, selfish, brutish-”

“Pompous ass instigatin’ little-”

“-Callous disrespectful pig!”

“-Brat.”

The words topple over themselves and you both can’t get a full sentence in as insults are hurled like physical objects. The few days you’ve spent on the farm so far have been nothing short of hell, specifically around Toji. You’ve never worked this hard in your life; then again, that’s not saying much. He'd disregard your lack of general strength and enthusiasm. Sometimes he’d hold the underside of the bag to take some of the weight off, to which you often added “why don’t you just grab the whole damn thing?” A smirk and curt response were simply “Nope.”

Most days you merely dragged a few bags to the pick-up truck and spent the rest of the day lounging around the garden. You’d stumble into the kitchen, a bead of sweat barely manifesting on your brow, and complain to Annie about Toji’s evil plan to make you contribute.

Today is no different and you laze on the chair with your back bent over it, groaning in theatrical agony. Annie sits across from you funneling blueberry muffin batter into a silver muffin tin. “Yea, yea, I hear ya” she jokes.

“Annie, do something” you drawl. She throws her hands up, “Can’t. Thats on you, now.” You scrape the side of the bowl and pop a blueberry-dipped finger in your mouth.

“Don’t eat raw egg, hun” she says, turning her back to put the tray in the oven. You unconsciously take another swipe, then the door swings open. Heavy cowboy boots trail to the kitchen, and you glance at the doorway. Toji leans on it with his hands in his pockets, white tank sprinkled with grass blades.

“Shit” you mumble.

“’M lookin for ya and here you are stuffing your face.”

“The girl neva worked a day in her life an’ you want her to be your assistant” Annie jests.

“’S about time, ain’t it? We’re not done yet. C’mon.” You let out another reluctant groan and follow behind him. “This is bullshit, nobody does this on a normal day.”

“Yea, nobody you know.”

In front of the wheelbarrow bags upon bags are filled to the brim with juicy red apples and the truck is just a few feet away. Your eyebrow twitches imagining the weight in your arms. “You can go fuck yourself if you think-” before you can finish your sentence, a bag is dropped into your arms that briefly sends you to the ground. Toji picks up two and flings them over his back. “What? Too weak?” He walks to the truck, ignoring the glare burning holes in the back of his head. Too weak, my ass. You definitely couldn’t beat him in a fight, but you damn sure wouldn’t let him talk down on you after proving your competence. You pull it up and haul it backwards, not without a few mild choice words.

“Jerk.”

The pungent odor of slurry and trough feed overcome any habitable air near the pig farm. The clothespin you have clamped around your nose barely blocks the smell. It’s the middle of the day, rays rippling heat off the stench and sending it for miles. Your cowboy boots struggle to sit upright on the uneven terrain blanketed with mud.

You don’t dare to open your mouth and complain in fear of it invading your sinuses. It’s your fault for nagging endlessly about the “back-breaking” work Toji forced you to do. your criticisms were met with some rendition of “suck it up”, and arguing only went in circles. Consistent arguing—from the moment you woke up to the last minutes of your shift, where you mouthed off one too many times for his liking. When you threatened to find another shift with someone else, he laughed in your face, a “good luck” drowning in derision.

Eventually Terrace got word of your grievances and offered part of his work to you. You accepted too soon without consulting Annie, happy to just rub it in Toji’s face that he’d be on his own carrying the bags. Simply the concept of it—Toji hunched over and covered in sweat with heaps of cargo—satiated your pride, and you’d count the days until he groveled and begged for your help again.

Except that’s not the case. As you fight the urge to sink into the mud a seed of regret grows in a more reasonable part of your mind. You could ask for your position back, where he’d probably be waiting with that shit-eating grin of his and “I told you so” written all over his face. Or you could be stubborn and prove whatever point you’re trying to make. Stupidly headstrong, you swallow the urge to vomit and plod into the pig pen.

The squelch of damp earth and God-knows-what underneath your boots is enough to make you sick. You’re balancing two full buckets of pigswill on either side of you, resisting the lack of steadiness that causes you to lean unfavorably. It’s no help that there’s filthy pigs all around you, snorting and trotting along. One bumps into the bucket and you shriek; your foot goes airborne and impending doom flashes before your eyes. Luckily, you gain stability and plant it firmly into the ground with an awful bubbling noise. The mess has soiled your boots coming up to your calves, and you frantically check for mud-to-skin contact. It wouldn’t be the end of the world, but it’d definitely be the end of your day. Suddenly, a whistle from the other side of the wooden fence grabs your attention.

“Go on then, pig queen!” Toji yells, elbows propped on the edge. His accent gets thicker when he yells. He’s not affected by the smell in the slightest, and it almost looks like he’s breathing in extra hard to taunt the shortage of oxygen reaching your brain.

“Fuck you!” you yell in a nasally tone. He adjusts his cowboy hat, “I’d focus on what’s in front of ya. Wouldn’t wanna slip in shit, right?” You scoff and continue to the troughs.

You can’t imagine how Terrace, let alone anyone does it—from the constant clamor of livestock to sinking in pools of muck for hours. There’s dirt on your knees, clothes, in places you never imagined dirt could reach. The pigs seem excited as you place the pails on the rim, whereas you exert a long sigh for the fulfilled trek. They come running in unison as if something triggered in their brains, pushing past each other to get there first. Once they’re emptied, a partial weight lifts from your shoulders. You shoot an arrogant sneer at Toji, and watch the corner of his scar tip up just a little. You’re still pinned to the side, and a wet snout gently prods your exposed leg. It tickles and you laugh at its cluelessness. “Hey, I’m not on the menu.”

As you slither out the crowd, a sneaky puddle attempts to take you out. You cling to the embarrassment, to Toji standing right there ready to mock you. You won’t give him the satisfaction. From there you take careful steps, one cautious foot after the other. Toji meets you around the entrance, and you’re about to reach the gate. You’re oozing confidence now; you might even brag to your father about the effortlessness of it all, that living on a farm is nothing, that you were able to accomplish anything—

Slip. Crash!

You’re knocked clean off your ass, so fast it doesn’t register until a few blinks pass. You hold a breath and the blurriness fades.

Brown. It’s on your face.

It’s truly everywhere—mud sloshing around in your boots, seeping into your clothes, sticking to the crevices, your fingers intertwined in the mass below.

The emotion you try to stifle boils over into a horrified squeal, a tune that exceeds the pigs. And you scream and scream. Once for the mud and twice for the death of your designer boots. You’re so entwined in your own screams that you barely catch the laughter a few feet away.

It’s him, doubled over with a practically red face. “I get you wanna be one of the pigs but you don’t hafta roll in it too!” Toji chortles. He can’t contain himself, wiping the tears on his glove.

Your ears feel hot. “Shut the fuck up and get me out of here!”

“Relax, relax. Gimmie a second.” The footsteps get further away, and you stumble to the gate to open. It doesn’t matter now that the damage is done, and you look like some terrifying swamp monster from myth. The lower half of you could only be concocted in a child's nightmares.

Something snakes in the trampled grass, then it pauses. “Here.” Sooner than you can turn your head, you’re blasted with water. It rains on you like a thundershower and you cover your face from the assault. Denim weighs heavy, and your hair sticks to your face. You feel the dirt washing off, but now you’re soaked in a mixture of water and sodden debris. Wet, you’re spitting out water and treating your fingers like windshield wipers. The hose finally drops, and your eyes trail from the hand to the face.

That shit-eating grin.

“No need to thank me, miss piggy.”

Your lip twitches. Should you kill him? Absolutely. Is it worth it? In this moment, yes. You’re doused, dirty, nose blind, and no longer hanging on to your act of humility. You have to get him back, at least once. It doesn’t matter if you have to wait all summer for it, creeping in doorways for the perfect time to demean him. There’s no level playing field—either your way or nothing. A smile stretches across your face.

“You’re so right, darling. Now let me show you just how much I appreciate you.” You saunter to him, and he awaits with open arms. Before he can grab you, you dodge him and snatch the hose from the ground.

Aim and fire, full force directly at his face. The blast knocks his hat off and into the air, swaying in the balmy breeze. His arm falls short of snatching it, plopping into the pen to blend with shit. You can’t hear the muffled curses he spouts, but damn is it satisfying to silence him. Then he reaches for you to which you promptly escape his span. You take time hosing down any remaining dry spots, and once the hose is down, he launches. You yelp and return to his face, and the abruptness makes him slip. Right into the mud you just shook off, he lands butt-first. It splatters his cargo pants and creates polka dot patterns on the white tank stretching to accommodate his frame. “You little-”

Another burst of water. He tries to stand on slippery foundation and quickly falls, earth splashing back on him. You understand why he was laughing so hard and you can’t stop giggling at the misery of inescapable rain showers.

“Looks like you needed some too! I can smell you from here!” you laugh. His snicker comes off more conniving than it should, and you brace for whatever hell you’ll have to pay later. He bolts up, and you make a run for it. Just when he thinks he has you, he slips again.

“Poor grandpa! Someone get his life alert!” you cackle, dropping the hose and sprinting for the hills. You’re too afraid to turn around when you know for a fact he is mere feet away from capturing you. You cut through air, nothing but crumpling grass and laughter carried by the wind. It’s exhilarating...fun?

You're confused by your own actions. You smell horrible, your hair is sticky, disgusting slop clings to you like a second skin, the sun is only baking the scent, and your self-proclaimed rival is chasing you.

You should be mortified, and somehow, you’ve never felt better.

Motes of dust scatter within the golden hue of mornings wake. The window’s cracked open, and remnants of last night's chill carry through sunrise. You’ve sat in this claw tub for way too long, melting in steam and lavender bubbles that slowly dissipate the longer you linger. A self-care day is what you need, especially after the “incident” that still makes your skin crawl weeks later. Simply your mud mask, waning candles, and rustling leaves. It’s rare you get silence like this nowadays, with Toji constantly on your back bickering about trivial problems.

You can’t place your finger on what bothers you more, or if you’re really even bothered at all. Ironically, spending more time mulling over what you hate than actually hating him. You can mouth your contempt for him endlessly like an affirmation on deaf ears, but it never truly manifests.

He’s annoying, selfish, crude, and disrespectful.

Oh, and did I mention very annoying?

It’s almost a bonding experience between you two; you’ve memorized the way his lips curve before a snarky remark, the deep crease on one side of his eyebrow when they furrow at something stupid you unintentionally did, his jaw clenching from held back words. His laugh—deep and resounding, unleashing a toxic mix of vomit and thrill in your stomach. You anticipate it, practice your insults in the shower for it, as if...you’re actually looking forward to it?

You steep further into the fragrant bath, hoping you’ll somehow be sucked into an alternate reality where you don’t have to face those conflicting emotions. To your displeasure, the conflict is brought directly to you.

A roaring engine disrupts your personal spa, and you jolt up. It sounds like a monster truck convention decided to congregate right below your bathroom window, and you definitely can’t relax under these conditions. You loosely wrap the towel around yourself and peer out over the windowsill. You can’t see a face, but you see that distinct cowboy hat stained over its silver conchos.

“Hey!” you yell. No response, but how could you expect him to when the hood is propped up. He must be wrenching something inside judging by the way his back muscles methodically tighten.

“HEY!”

“TOJI!” That gets his attention and he squints above, wrench still in hand. “Oh! What are ya doing there?”

“This is my bathroom you idiot!”

He pans between the vehicle and your window. “Oops!”

“Turn it off, I’m trying to have my beauty bath in peace!”

“Welp, can’t do anything about that now, can we?” He makes no attempt to turn it off, nor does he give you any more attention as he turns around and resumes working like nothing happened.

You run downstairs completely haggard, mud mask hardly washed off with a pair of mismatched socks and a baggy shirt. The rumbling gets louder, and you don’t have the patience for appearances when you step into those clod-smeared boots.

The screen door swings open and you march to the side of the house, towel bunched in your arms.

He doesn’t regard you until you launch it at his face, which he promptly catches without looking. “Thanks, needed somethin’ to dry off.” He wipes the oil streaks from his face and neck while you stand there scowling. His eyebrows narrow.

“What’s the problem now?” You should've predicted he’d say this, as every time a dispute arises over his uncivil actions he asks the same clueless question.

“What...God, you’re so annoying sometimes! Do you not understand how it doesn’t make any sense for you to be here and-” He’s spacing off, scratching the side of his head with the wrench. It drives you up the wall when he acts like this.

“Listen to me!” That triggers him back to the present, and the light flickers in his eyes just to deadpan you. “You done?”

“No, I’m not done. Say you’re sorry” you command. He takes the hat off his head and places it on his chest. “My apologies, princess. I’ll be sure to call the company and let them know their machine is too loud for your prissy little ass” he smiles, coy and bowing. You nudge him and the wind rushes from his nose.

“When you call them, let them know their piece of shit junk needs to be out of commission.”

“Well, this piece of shit lasts a lifetime.”

“What even is this?” You’re analyzing it, and it reminds you of the illegal three-wheelers certain people ride through the city. It has no seatbelt or roof, and a row of sharp spinning blades hooked to the back.

“City girl’s never heard of this, huh? ‘Sa tiller. Gets the job done durin’ plantin’ season.” You step towards it, but Toji stops you from going further with his arm. “Don’t go near the blades.”

“Obviously.” You shoo him and climb into the seat of tiller. You sink into the leather seat, lay back, and cross your feet on the wheel. Toji grimaces, but that subtle sign that you’re inconveniencing him eggs you on.

“Get yer feet off the wheel.”

“Mm, nah. It’s not hurting anyone.”

“’S hurting me.”

“Hmph, okay.” You switch your feet to the opposite cross, and he looks up to an invisible God, probably begging it to give him the strength to not throw you off.

“What did I-”

“Sorry, can’t hear you over the engine!” you scream. He sighs and hunches back over the hood. “Jus’ be quiet for me, have to finish this.” Funny how he asks for quiet in these deafening circumstances.

You didn’t plan on watching him work, but you hate to admit it’s kind of interesting. It’s the quietest he’s ever been, sweat trickling down his temples from the apparent heat on the inside. This must’ve been what Annie meant at the beginning, about his silence and reluctance to speak unless being spoken to. The scars scattered on his bicep shift with the cranking wrench, and you can’t help but focus on it. They’re too deep to be cat scratches and healed with a bunched sheen under its darker edges. There’s one under his collarbone, too, peeking past his shirt neckline dark and jagged. Your mind wanders, for the past life he had—what was his family like, why does he choose to live here, why are there so many scars, what led him to-

“You’re staring.” You snap out of it, to him wiping the excess oil on his shirt.

“Sorry.”

“Oh? Where’d that hospitality come from all of a sudden?” You can’t explain why, but there’s a solemn pit burning in your stomach. Perhaps you’d lighten up a bit, at least for now. “Appreciate it while it lasts” you remark. He grins and gets back to work.

“What are you doing?”

“Changin’ the ignition coil. That’s why she sounds like hell.”

Your ears perk up, “She?”

“Yup.”

“Does she have a name?”

“Nope.”

“Can I name her?” He puts the replacement coil on, “Knock yourself out.”

“Hmm…how about….Priscilla?” He can’t purse his lips quick enough to stop the laugh that escapes.

“Hey! I think Priscilla’s a cute name” you add. “Yeah, for an old woman.”

“No way, an old woman name would be something like ‘Gertrude’.”

“Gertrude’s on the same level as Priscilla.”

“Either way it’s fitting, isn’t it? An old woman for an old man.” His scar tips up. “Ha ha. Think I’m pretty fit for an old man, though.”

Your eyes reluctantly snap to his chest muscles peeking through the shirt. “You manage.” He pushes the coil away from the flywheel.

“Maybe Rosy? Oh, or Susie.”

“Think I’ll just call ‘er (Y/N).”

“Huh? Why my name?”

“So when you make me mad, I can curse her out instead of you. Best part is she won’t talk back.” He tightens the last screws and shuts the hood. Immediately the banging stops, and the engine reduces to a whir. You clap sarcastically, “Nice job! You get a C minus.”

“Why not an A?”

“You’ll get an A when you stop pissing me off.”

Sticky sunbeams melt and mold into your pores, stiff from the aftereffects of its suffocating warmth. The sky gives way to a heatwave, where shimmering hot sheets scorch the ground and ripple like a retreating ocean. Lionel taught you how to harvest fruit before the rooster’s crow, and you reaped the rewards of your labor all morning. You’re numbed to the moisture collecting on your face at this point, as its vicious, stuffy humidity swallows your breaths and envelops your bleary eyes. You chose to shut them over battling the sun, bathing in its essence. It would settle in the late afternoon and blend to a forgiving mess of sunset swatches, but in the meantime, you’d soak up a bronzing tan.

You brought a blanket to the nearest tree you could find, an expansive canopy spearheading small manageable daylight. You’re leafing through the pages of a non-fiction novel you never finished with a makeshift flower bookmark tucked under your thumb. You occasionally stop to dive in the compensation for your earlier efforts; a basket of scarlet strawberries twisted around prickly stems.

The book tugs from your grasp and you prop up your sunglasses, gazing at the perpetrator.

It only takes a glance to notice how badly burnt Toij’s body is. Does he really need someone to remind him to apply sunscreen, a basic necessity, or did he get too wrapped up in his work again? Toji was, if nothing else, a hard worker. You caught yourself on more than one occasion observing him. You saw it in the way the other farmers freely asked for his help, and how he’d give it for nothing in return. He moved like the wind, stoic demeanor all consuming, to behave like the rough muteness he pushed upon himself.

A rosy shade diffuses on the apples of his cheeks and clearly separates from the protected and unprotected parts of his flesh. Its shape outlines a tank top he must’ve been wearing with the bottom hiked up, bright rubescent pattern surrounding his surprisingly smooth pecs. You take a mental note to nag him about it next time. The smudged outline of your glasses reflects on his glistening lower abdomen and his chest heaves like a marathon in the desert.

“What ya reading?” he asks. His eyes drag across the page. “None of your business” you retort, hazy and lax from summer’s embrace. He peers over the book and passes it off to you.

“Don’t seem like the reading type.” He plops down on the grass with a basket of dirt and carrots, few contorted to an inedible extent. “Neither do you.” He digs his fingers in the basket and begins fishing out the deformed carrots. The usual banter, macerated by exhaustion, ghosts by with little intent.

“If you’re looking for help, I don’t feel like it.”

“I know.”

You both don’t say anything for a while, taking in the warmth, the cicadas buzzing in a faraway tree, the brewing pause between your bodies, unsaid words binding you to selfish outcomes, depriving you of your deepest hunger. The book is no longer as interesting as you remember. You’re more inclined to watch the sunburnt farmer.

He picks up another clump. Inching along the carrot is a ladybug. Toji regards it for a second with the same eyes that chop trees and drag metal. At first, he does nothing. Then you track the tip of his finger as it prods slightly, goading the ladybug onto it. He carries it with the same unwavering stoicism to a blade of grass, where the ladybug hops off and continues its journey.

Speechless would be an understatement. Truthfully, he’s the last person you’d expect to act that way. Those battered palms, bruised and scarred, tattered with memories, could appear so gentle. Those same hands would afford the fragile beings of mankind a moment of mercy. Only you are granted the privilege of Toji’s micro movements; his shoulders slumping from their usual solidity, his eyelids relaxing, jaw unclenching. Is this what he wanted you to see? Is that why he came here, sitting in the shade of a rival you thought you had? You must be staring for too long because-

“…What?”

“Oh. Uh, nothing.”

He returns to what he was doing.

“It’s about the search for meaning in life. A psychiatrist's perspective.”

“Your book?” He asks, sifting through the sod.

“Yeah.”

“So…did he figure it out?”

“He believes that the primary human drive is not pleasure, but the pursuit of what we find meaningful.” He doesn’t react, but a curious part of you wanted him to respond. Tell you a story or spill his guts, lay bare in front of you so that you may latch on to something, anything that isn’t rumors or hushed whispers for the man unknown to everyone. He checks another carrot—it’s as if he’s looking past it, like a light switched off, engulfed in a reflection pulling him further and further.

You point the tip of a strawberry to him and his attention diverts, “You want?”

“Can’t. Hands full.”

You eye them; thick and calloused, fingernails lined with soil, probably sore along with the rest of his body. You can’t bear to watch—surely not because you care, but because of your sudden aptitude to kindness.

“Just come here.” He leans over cautiously, and the shock is palpable when you press it to his lips. He seems to contemplate the risk of poison for a second.

“If I wanted to kill you, it would’ve happened already. Open.” He obediently parts his mouth, and you feed it to him. Toji’s eye contact stuns like a spell from a Greek myth—devastatingly enchanting and hard to disengage. Just when you think you have the upper hand, you’re quickly reminded that dynamic can easily change. He rolls his tongue over the bite mark and sucks the juices, and you can’t look away—you won’t.

It’s the sun. it has to be. It’s getting to you both.

You flinch when his lips ghosts against your knuckles. Soft and slightly chapped. Sugary liquid pools at the plush center of his lips where your eyes linger for too long, and he licks that up too. It’s over as quick as it began. Then you’re stuck stirring in the disarray of your own deluded thoughts.

His scar curls with a growing smirk. It’s a shallow cut, but sunken, nonetheless. You tell yourself it’s the weather when your thumb moves from the strawberry to his face. Languid, careful motions where the hollow of his cheek would be, like gaining the trust of a wild animal. He doesn’t budge, and you press it to the corner of his mouth.

“How’d you get this mark on your face?”

“Not important” he responds curt.

“Why? I wanna know.” His jaw clenches, reappearing stiff and guarded. “Don’t push it.”

You trace it, fixating, studying the feeling. You drag downwards, tugging it slightly.

“…like someone cut you” you mutter.

Suddenly, he stands up with the basket. His joy fades to indifference; eyes encased in a dense fog. You retreat to your side, and he doesn’t acknowledge you as he starts down the hill.

“I-“

“I have to get this to Lionel. See ya.”

You’re given the back of him, receding into the distance. There’s a dull pounding in your ears, a twitch in your limbs that pleads for you to follow. But what would you say? What could you say? It doesn’t come to fruition.

The space between you widens with each step.

“-we’re expecting to see cloudy skies and storms for the re-” the portable radio buzzes in and out of connection, “-prepare for the weather by-”. Annie fiddles with the tuner to get it back on track. It crackles and scratches, but the connection can’t be regained, finally diminishing to static.

You weren’t listening either way, huddled with your knees close to your chest on the window seat, resting your head as raindrops trickle down the glass and pitter-patter the windowsill. The trees bend to the will of the raging wind, and they’re being pulled every which direction. Ceramic settles behind you, and you crane your neck to Annie, then the novelty mug resembling an orange. You don’t reach for it, but you stare for a while, teabag bleeding burgundy under the millions of candles placed around.

“Thank you for the tea.”

“Don’t mention it.”

You’ve had a hard time sleeping lately. Conflictingly so, since you’d imagine more sleep would be had with Toji coming around less. It’s what you wanted. Him chasing you was exhausting, wasn’t it? His behavior, his manners, him—it was just a bother. You should be glad you haven’t seen him since the incident.

If he pained you, why are you kept awake, fumbling with the covers, incessantly thinking of Toji? You put together witty remarks for when you cross paths again, new creative insults, schemes you’ll act out to piss him off—all of this for someone you tried to get away from for half the summer. You assumed a week would pass and everything would be back to normal. But one week turned into two, then three. Your stay is coming to a close, and as you reflect, you’re forced to reconsider the unspoken reality gnawing at your thoughts since the moment you first met.

That you were free to be dirty, to curse, to learn, to get mud on your face and dirt underneath your fingernails. You could lounge in an outfit from days ago or dance in the fury of midsummer. You were stupid, but not inferior the way wealthy upperclassmen made you out to be. You had the freedom to be stupid. There were no hierarchies or social status between you—simply hard work and hostility. Somehow that, being tangled in the thorns of a never-ending war, felt better than the yacht parties you’d been accustomed to.

He sets your blood aflame, but noting ignites a fire in you like Toji.

Annie sits crisscross on the loveseat, warming her hands with the cup. You return her content smile.

“Everythin’ alright, sugar?”

“Think I messed up.”

“Hm? How so?”

“I feel like...I overstepped. Actually, I know I did, and I feel bad. Even though I think I shouldn’t.”

Annie exhales a soft laugh, “Assumin’ this is about Toji?”

You nod, and she traces the rim of the cup. “If ya don’t care about ‘im, don’t feel bad.” You don’t reply, and she continues, “Though...I have a sneaky suspicion you care more than you'd like to admit.”

You bury your head further into you. “Feelings are weird” you mumble.

“They defnintely are. But sometimes it’s good to listen to ya heart. Take it from an old lady.”

“...”

“When ya feel bad about somethin’ ya did, the best way’s to apologize.”

You peek through your arms, “Has he ever told you? Like, about his life?”

She wanders in thought, recollecting an old memory, “Nope. Youngin’ showed up on the farm one day all scratched up and been workin’ ever since.”

If nobody knew, you wouldn’t expect him to comply with your demands. You’re conscious of what needs to be done, but doubt surfaces. What does my heart tell me?

You start tying your boots and throw on a hoodie in a pile by the door.

“Do you know where he is?”

“Not a clue.” That’s fine. Today, you’d be the one chasing after him.

The brunt of the storm smacks you in the face once the door flies open. “Careful out there!” she hollers, and you shut the screen behind you. Your fight or flight refuses to let go of the knob as the squall persists, invoking a shrouded sea of churning clouds and indigo, banging against the foundation of the house. You scale the side and notice the barn, no light inside. You go around the back and it’s the same, wheat failing to resist the storm. However, for a split second you squint and spot a flicker. It’s faint and the size of a firefly from your view, coming from the stables further down. There’s a chance it isn’t him, but you don’t have much room for hypotheticals.

The safety of the overhang leaves you, and you’re in the middle of a downpour. Running, inching the line of being knocked off your feet from an abrupt gust. You’re submerged in seconds, but you don’t stop running. If your heart tells you to endure, then you will. Raindrops threaten to invade your eyes, whacking you repeatedly in the face, but you shut tight and go forward. The last stretch to the stable feels like clawing up a mountain. The flurry hauls your clothes, and your steps get heavier and heavier as nature batters the earth.

Then the sleeve shielding your face grazes something solid. You glue yourself to the side of it and pry your eyes open. An oil lantern, shining bright in the dark. You shuffle around for the sliding door and slip inside. The interior is cozy, haybales piled wherever they could fit and a couple large wooden stables supported by beams. The power must’ve went out everywhere, oil lanterns casting dimly.

Your instinct to breathe ceases when you see Toji. His cowboy hat is tilted back, paisley bandana tied loosely around his neck with an ear of wheat tucked in his teeth. He glances at the sound of the door slamming. You’re blanking, even after you mulled over those sleepless evenings. It doesn’t help that your heart won’t function properly.

“...Hey” he says, a tone unrepresentative of his avoidance. He grins—in the exact way you like—and picks the straw out.

You’re irritated he’s even attempting to talk to you as normal.

“It’s rainin’. You should be inside.” He grabs his shirt and pats your face dry. You don’t complain; a musky scent of cedar and salt when you inhale. “I could say the same to you. Why are you out here?” you murmur through the cloth.

“Horses get a little antsy when the weathers like this. Came by to calm em’ down.” He pets the blonde mane of one of lighter horses, covered in brown spots. They look comfortable around him, loose lower jaw slanting to his touch. You’re forgetting how to talk. There he goes again, subverting your expectations.

“What kind of horse is it?”

“Spotted draft horse. She’s real gentle, wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

“She’s pretty.” He flashes his canines, “Her name’s Marie.”

“Old woman name” you say under your breath. He laughs. “Wanna pet ‘er?”

You’re shy but interested, shuffling closer to the stable. The tips of your ears blossom when his palm encloses your wrist, rough skin abrading yours. Then he guides you to the side of Marie’s neck. “You’re gonna pet here. Nice an’ slow, yeah?” he instructs, way too close. It’s silky, and you’re absorbed in the feeling of it on your fingertips. She neigh’s mildly and you jolt. Toji keeps you still.

“Atta girl” he whispers, husky and painfully smooth in your ear. It fills your head like a shot of whiskey and a tipsy glow flows from your face. Your muscles tense, troubled from your anticipated apology and the unforeseen shift in feelings for him. There’s no way you can do this without stumbling.

“I didn’t know you liked horses so much.” He lets go.

“Yup. Used to have one.” You turn to him. His pleasant expression remains, but it’s solemn, bittersweet. You take a long breath and let it spill.

“I’m sorry for what I did before. I realized I made you uncomfortable asking those questions. It won’t happen again.”

He subdues his hum and he’s awkward in his stance, rubbing the back of his head like a guilty child. “I was never mad. I just...” He trails off.

“Never mind that. Big man still pissed at you?” he asks, like mood switch occurred. If he won’t dwell on it, you’ll try not to either. You connect the dots to your father's pet name.

“That’s what you call him?” you giggle.

“Yup, since I got to the farm.”

“I hope not, if he is I’ll probably never leave.”

“Is that a bad thing?” It’s a humorless joke, wavering someplace unsure.

“It would be if I never finished school.”

“What ya majoring in?” You’re hesitant to say for the possible doubt he’ll display. You dance around the answer.

“Promise you won’t laugh.” His expression contorts to confusion. “Fine...I promise.”

“Humanitarianism.” He goes blank like a mannequin, and by the way his lip fights a flit he’s holding in his laughter as much as possible.

“Forget it-”

“I didn’t laugh. What ya gonna do with your degree?”

“I want to help people.”

He folds his arms over his chest, “But you don’t wanna help me?”

“N-not that kind of help. Like, housing help, financial help. No one should have to work as hard as you...”

“So, you wanna help old broke runaways like me, huh?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I mean it’s admirable, darlin’, but I work here cause I want to. ’S a good gig, takes the mind off o’ things.”

Your mouth moves before your brain, “...What things?”

“Thought you weren’t gonna ask me shit like that anymore.”

“My bad.”

“I’ll give you what you want.” He locks the gate to the stable. Your blood feels hotter when he’s fixed on you.

“Y’know...the thing about foster care is you’re never guaranteed a good home, or even a home at all.” Toji simpers out of place, out of tune like a broken piano. “I was one of the lucky few that got sent home to home. Got attached just to get thrown back in the same shithole with the other rejects. It hurt at first, but after a while you get so used to the feeling that you’re not wanted or needed. And when a foster kid grows out of the system and they throw your ass on the street, gotta get it however you can.” Though he tells it like the casual reminiscence of childhood, you know better than that.

“So, I taught myself to survive, no matter the cost and regardless of who it hurt. I’ve done some irredeemable shit. Held people at gunpoint, beat them up for money, stole their valuables, all the shit they worked hard for.”

“I fought for food, shelter. Hell, anything I could get my hands on. I never killed anyone but damn sure got close, all for an overnight motel stay and sometimes a couple cigs.” He ambles to you and you automatically back up. Your space is squeezed to capacity, and whenever you get a portion of relief, he seals it. You take a step; he takes one more.

“You wanted to know how I got this, right?” He taps the corner of his mouth where the scar is.

“I entered a fighting ring for money, the kind that trades boxing gloves for knives. And boy, was I desperate. He chucked that blade at my mouth and I crushed his throat, sliced him across the eyes. I bled for a while but it kept me full for a few days.” Your back hits the door and he cages you.

“‘Ventually the wanted flyers started coming out. Thought about turning myself in, but what kind of asshole admits to his crimes? So, I kept running, running from everything. I can’t remember how long I went for. But then I ended up here.”

Rain pelts the roof. You remind yourself to inhale and exhale. It’s a conscious thought, in and out, processing the secrets revealed. There’s nowhere to hide, yet you don’t feel unease—solely the faint pang of sorrow. Toji appears warm under the rich glimmer. The rugged contours meld to his lowered gaze, lips twisted in a frown you hardly recognize. He looks entirely different, disconnected from your quarrels. To you this feels like it should be an attempt at intimidation, but the way he's boxing you in screams loose and unsteady. A wounded beast bearing its fangs as a defense mechanism. His arms are corded in muscle and riddled with injuries, likely from the upsets, days of begging for food, wondering when his next meal will be or if he just consumed his last, where he will go to survive, how he will survive.

“Are you scared now?”

He’s a vagrant. He lived on the fringes of society, avoiding the law and committing horrific acts for his own benefit. He hurt people. Who’s to say he wouldn’t hurt you next? Annie was right. Toji is right. You need to be afraid.

Instantly, his little quirks made sense. The barriers he built and his hesitation to speak, forbearing and tolerant in spite of the bruises. He was afraid of being thrown away again, to be the same teen casted to the streets—proven useless.

You’re inches away. It’s unsaid, begging you to repel him. There’s no rationale in your actions.

You stand on your toes and catch his lips in a kiss.

Brief, charged with the comfort that got lost on your tongue. His lips requite yours and leave traces of bourbon. You didn’t know he drank. It’s so brief you linger in the aftermath of heat, hoping you can satiate your interest with two, maybe three more kisses.

Your noses graze each other. His half-lidded eyes captivate you, freezing you in time, to plinking mist and airy touches, yearning on the brink of impulse. He hovers over your lips, shuddering on the expel. Then he withdraws.

“Ya have no sense of danger.”

You can’t think straight, haven’t been able to for some time now. “You’re not scary. Just annoying.”

“...I'm glad.”

He grabs his sherpa lined jacket off a haybale and wraps it around your torso. It’s far too big and pieces of hay poke your lower back. He pulls the hood over, “This should be good. C’mon, let’s get ya back in the house.” Toji opens the stable doors. Tiny droplets percolate at your frigid feet, and you stick your head out.

Fog clings to the edge of the horizon. The storm ended, and the land washed anew.

“Ouch.”

“Careful, hun.”

The sewing needle pricks your thumb from the other side of the glove again and you flinch, though you probably have tons of holes in your skin at the moment. You’re by no means the best at sewing, but it’s not like Toji could do any better based on the tears in the leather. You’re curled like a shrimp on the dining chair, weaving the needle through a heavy-duty fabric you found in the sewing basket Annie gave you. Floral pin cushions, yarn, thread, and bunches of fabric are splayed across the gingham table.

It’s likely Toji would’ve slaved it to the bone and never ask for another pair, so when you got to your room and found them in the jacket pocket you felt inclined to assist. Plus, it’s a good distraction from the half-embarrassment half-shock you grieved from your boldness the other day.

A draft pierces the chiffon curtains. It’s getting colder and the final day of your vacation has arrived, both short and torturously long. You think about the things that passed the time, the person that shortened your days to summertime laughter and mischief. Before the farm, you would’ve relished in a going away party with a performer and glittering spotlight. Yet, as cattle moo and land are tilled for the upcoming season, the profoundness of being ordinary is more pleasant than the former.

You pull the last thread through the patch and admire your amateur mend, navy fabric accented amongst the mahogany leather. Vanilla and lemon permeate the house while a bundt cake rises in the oven.

Annie hands you a few stationery notecards smudged with flour fingerprints. “Write somethin’ nice for ‘em. Don’t think they’ll be able to say goodbye before you go. ‘S gettin’ busier and busier nowadays.” You nod and start writing messages of appreciation for Lionel and Terrace, thanking them for putting up with your cluelessness.

“Should I write one for you, too?”

“You can jus’ tell me now” she beams.

“Well, Annie, thank you for everything—for showing me around, cooking for everyone, making sure we’re all healthy and full. Most of all, thanks for treating me like family.”

She tussles your hair, “You’ll always be family, honeybun.”

Hooves on stone trot near the house and your heart skips a beat. You walk to the screen door and see Marie’s long mane, then Toji holding the reins. He looks like a true cowboy, double stitched western belt with a taut plaid flannel and chestnut cowboy hat to match his boots. You open the door and lean on the porch column.

“Wanna go for a ride?” he calls.

“Usually, guys say that when they have an expensive car.”

“Well, this here’s an expensive horse. That good enough for ya?”

“...I guess it’ll have to do” you say, continuing to Marie with a delicate caress on her neck.

He holds his hand out, “Up.”

“To where?”

“Stop askin’ so many questions.” You roll your eyes and grab his wrist. He abruptly hauls your body weight over Marie and you squeak. It's higher than you thought and you struggle to adjust your legs in the right position on the saddle.

“Might wanna hold on.”

You scoff, “I can handle myself.” As soon as you say that, Marie breaks into a sprint. You would’ve flown off the mare if not for your flailing arms finding safety around Toji’s waist. “You did that on purpose, you ass!” you scream.

“I have no idea what ya talkin’ ‘bout.” You can hear the smile when he says that.

Hammered dirt belches behind as you leave a thick forest similar to the one you drove through for your arrival. It’s a scene from a storybook, carving through a colorful meadow bursting with wildflowers. They teeter in the headwind and so do you, hair whipping onto your face from the speed. The canopy that once enveloped you becomes a faint, fading outline against the sky and bushes shrink to specks. The landscape melts like an impressionism painting.

Toji has expert control over the mare and his stature stands tall in spite of haste. You scale the hills, appreciating the natural foundation carving willowy trees, the miles of foliage, the cattails in a small sparkling river etched in a meandering bank. Birds sing their evening songs, and an animal rustles through the grass. Eventually you pause at the summit, immersed in a vast, unspoiled scenery stretching infinitely. Toji hasn’t said much, but neither do you.

“I thought you’d wanna see this” he mutters.

“How come?”

“When ya weren’t working, you’d just climb to the hilltops and... stare. Never knew what you were staring at, but I assumed it was the view.”

“You don’t see stuff like this in the city. It’s so peaceful here.”

“It never gets old.” You look at him, corners of his mouth mellow. You recall the way they felt and butterflies involuntarily bloom from a deep pit in your stomach.

You yank the hat from his head and try it on. “Hey, give it here.” You duck his grasp and push it down.

“It looks cute on me.”

“So what?”

“You don’t think it matches my shoes?”

“I think you’re a brat.”

“Hmm” you say, feigning contemplation. “You should know, women don’t like angry old men. It’s so uncute.”

“Heh, really. I’m uncute?” he laughs. “Yeah, among a few other things.”

“Well I’m sorry, princess, but you’re a real pain in the ass too.”

“The feeling’s mutual” you retort.

“...Is it?” You don’t have a remark for that. The sun recedes into the horizon, radiating burnt orange and red. He uses the reigns to guide Marie back in the direction of the farm. “I’ll miss the countryside.” The brim of his hat dips over your eyes and you don't correct yourself when you lean to his back, calmed from the rocking sway.

Toji pulls the reigns at the stairs and gets off. You impassively accept his aid as he

scoops and sets you down.

The buzzing porch light attracts moths with its fluorescence. Amidst the prolonged awkward silence and clumsy gestures, you’re searching for your soul’s response like Annie mentioned. Whenever you tried, the message got tangled on your tongue. Given another chance, it eludes you again.

“I guess this is it.”

“Yup” he agrees.

“Try not to miss me too much.”

He smirks, “I’ll do my best. Goodnight, little miss.”

He left and it’s time for you to get some sleep. But you can’t. You’re wide awake, glued to the ceiling thinking about him like your life depends on it. Maybe the instigator in you was waiting for confrontation, or the truth hurts more than you thought it would. You sit up like you’re expecting something, like you just lost a long-fought battle. You need the last word.

It’s a quaint home with tawny wood accents. Jacket and gloves in tow, you can’t formulate a single justifiable reason for being at his front door. You lie and tell yourself it’s to return his possessions, as if you ever cared, like his hat isn’t resting on your dresser. You knock twice.

Toji unlocks the door wearing nothing but his jeans, hair shaggier than usual. “Look who’s here” he says, a tinge of shock and something sweeter. You shove the items to him. “Your jacket, and uh…your gloves were bad, so I sewed them up. Try to take better care of your things.” He slings it to the side.

“Heh. Yes, ma’am.”

“So…um.”

“Is that all you’re here for?” Not in the slightest. You’re here to get something off your chest, right? You’re not even sure what you’re mad about anymore.

“Y-yeah.”

“Alright then, see ya in the mornin’.” The door slowly winds closed, but you interrupt, “Were you trying to insinuate something?”

It stops and he cracks it further, smile growing. “Not tryin’ to insinuate anything I haven’t noticed already”

You’re burning under his gaze. “Wha…I swear, your ego is insane. You should be grateful I’ve been so nice-“

“Your eyes tend to…” he regards you from head to toe, “…roam. You’re not as subtle as you think.”

“Like I wanna look at you.”

“I wouldn’t mind if ya did.”

“God, you’re so far up your own-“

“You haven’t left yet.” His relaxed demeanor aggravates you, as if he's fully aware of why you’re here. He edges closer, chest inches away from yours, voice slow and gravelly in the dead of night.

“There’s somethin’ you want, right? Ask for it.”

Your pulse travels to your ears. Longing teetering on the cusp of fire.

“Fuck this.” You turn to leave, when suddenly your arm gets snatched back and pulled into the room. The door shuts and you’re flung against it, though there’s no room to move when Toji’s pressed chest-to-chest. His breathing heaves, and you can feel it rising and falling laden with yours as he’s loomed over you.

“What’s with the sass, huh?” he chides. His grip is bruising, but the small victory of a sinking composure sends a chill up your spine you’d rather not think about.

“You started it, don’t act so innocent now.” You can tell he’s physically holding back, the shakiness in his little breaths becoming more evident. The wild blaze in his eyes eats you up with greed.

“You really need to be taught some fucking manners.”

“You’re gonna punish me?” You’re both at a whisper, too scared to speak the words you’ve been keeping to yourselves.

“I wanna do so much worse.”

“Then do it.”

He holds your neck in place and you succumb to raw and unrestrained fervor. Rough, uncoordinated kisses being dragged over the expanse of your lips and you’re hardly able to maintain the pace. Your free hand curls through his tresses and pushes him deeper into you. He groans through those rushed, bruising kisses reddening your lips and immediately hunts for more.

You didn’t expect Toji to be a gentle lover by any means, but it’s the way his mouth never leaves yours, a certain thirst that can’t be satiated no matter how much he drinks. You bite his bottom lip, teeth collide and he repeats the feast all over again. You can’t tell if he’s trying to savor it or devour you in one go.

His hands snake from your neck to the fat of your ass, and he delivers a quick smack before hoisting you around his waist. Trails of spit connect where you part for air, but he swiftly chases it with tongue, pushing into your mouth and clouding your head. You intertwine, wet and feverish as it explores your mouth.

He’s ruthlessly scouring fulfillment, drunk off the pleasure he finds in swallowing your moans and traversing your numbing lips. You’re sweating, hot in all the right places, and you return the favor with similar passion. Your lower back aches but he doesn’t give any inclination that he’ll let up soon, grinding on the delicate, sticky lace of your panties exposed from your hiked up dress.

“Fuck, I can feel it through your clothes” he groans, lazily undulating his hips.

“S-shut up- ah!” Your stammering gets caught in a moan when the fabric presses against your clit just right. He wears a sleazy grin, moving slower to coax the barely audible whimper that escaped you a moment ago. “I wouldn’t mind if ya made a little noise” he husks. You’re shaky, trying to compose your trembling vocals threatening to call his name. In regular circumstances, you would’ve let yourself have it. But this is Toji, and the mischievous urge you reserve for him wants to shoot down his boosted ego.

“Maybe you’re not doing good enough.”

“Really...” Toji’s huffs a humorless laugh, and you have half the mind to acknowledge that you just fucked up. He enriches the kiss and movements get a little angrier, bulge rutting into you furiously.

“Then I’ll make it so good for ya, darlin’” he rasps, “So good you’ll hafta beg me.”

It’s impossibly big, and sliding against the aching mess restrained in his pants doesn’t quell your concerns. You swear you can feel the dim thump thump thump through it.

You unlatch again, severing a trail of spit when you briefly make eye contact. They’re crazed, far and near at the same time and somehow sparkling the prettiest shade of hazel green. He immediately claims space on your neck. Sucking and biting, feral groaning between your pulse point that drums whenever his appendage glides along a sweet spot. His teeth graze harsh against your skin and you can feel purple and blue burgeoning like watercolor splotches on an untouched canvas.

And he must be long gone, pinning you between the door and his haughty strength, spit glistening on your neck. You’re using whatever pride you have left to clamp your mouth shut, though it’s obvious to Toji as his lips curl when your breath stutters. He detaches with a wet smack, and you can't angle away from the onslaught of tender kisses along the underside of your jaw.

He lifts you across the room, to the edge of his wooden platform bed draped in a deer pattern quilt. Your knees are wobbly on the descent and it hits when your feet touch the ground, almost slumping onto the mattress. Before you can, he grabs a fistful of hair at the back of your head and holds you upright.

“Stand straight” he barks, dangerously commanding. In one fell swoop, using one hand, he flips the buckle on his belt open and yanks it out the loops. His pants sag at his hips and the tent peaks with more room. He wraps the leather around your wrists and ties it over itself, securing tight—maybe too tight—at the end.

“On your fucking knees.” You don’t drop on the first order.

“Make me.” Typical—but he’s happy to guide you. He tugs your hair to the ground, and you thud onto the hardwood floors by your knees.

You knew Toji was hot, stealing glances of his shirtless torso plowing in the summer rays—but God, he truly is alluring. Straight below him you get the best view of the veins winding down his lower abdomen, the planes of his abs shining in the already low light. Underneath his pecs, full chest pulling taut with yearning, unruly need. In no time he unzips his fly and kicks his pants at his ankles, revealing firm boxer briefs and a dripping, milky stain trailing to the side. Your eyes follow, where his throbbing cockhead peaks out, rosy brown with pearls of greedy precome dribbling down. You can’t resist staring, devouring the sight and adding onto the stickiness coating your inner thighs. You lean in and pepper a few kisses on his tip. He hisses.

“Are you losing your composure?” you ask, reveling in his twitching abs. He grins, and you return the same, “Not yet. You’ll know when I do. I promise.”

You lick a long, mouthwatering stripe on it and he rasps a groan. He’s quick to snatch your scalp and tilt up, forcing you to gaze at him. “Look at me. Don’t take your eyes off me.” They appear darker, drunken.

He tugs the boxers down and his cock springs out centimeters from your face, glistening and flushed. He taps it on your lip and smears the sheen. You don’t break eye contact as required, especially when you lick your bottom lip to taste him.

“Fuck, such a slut.” He prods at your mouth and you gladly open, closing your puckered lips around the bulbous tip. “Nice and open for me” he mutters. It’s partly a mutter, resembling a hoarse ramble as he slides the length of his veiny, thrumming cock past your cheek fat constricting around him.

“Yeah, t-that’s it—fuck—just like that.” Your eyes water and beaded tears gather at your lashes, but he craves the back of your throat—he’ll make it fit if he needs to. You’re adjusting to his size, forcing yourself to accommodate him and hollowing your cheeks as best as you can, fulfilling a twisted desire to satisfy him. Your palate scraping his sensitive tip elicits a deep, gravelly moan that sends vibrations straight to your clit.

“Mm, that pretty mouth taking it so well f’me.” You open your throat and allow him to push further, swelling a noticeable bulge through your skin. He’s straining your mouth to capacity, and it’s only when your nose meets his pubes and his balls are flush with you that you try breathing.

It’s no use with his cock barreling down your throat. He keeps a firm grip on the back of your head, watching your body retch at the size of him for amusement. Then he pulls out and you dry heave from the sudden influx of normal air in your lungs. You’re soaked all the way through, hazy, hurting, but desperate for more. Too horny to remember your pride. What even is pride when you can’t tell the difference between drool and tears?

You’re French kissing his dick as if he’s not there, slobbering and licking it up, rolling your tongue over his frenulum like an animal in heat. Shame will overcome you by morning; in the meantime, you’ll indulge, drain him so that he can’t fathom speaking the word “brat” again. You loll your tongue and he smiles.

“I didn’t even fuck you yet and you’re already this bad?” He’s one to talk when his comebacks crack at the back of his throat, muscles sweaty and tense from your ministrations. “I’m a good man, so I’ll help ya out.”

Without warning, he drives himself all the way down your throat. You gag, but he’s relentless. He has hands on both sides of your head and he puts his foot on the edge of the bed, angling himself to probe deeper in your throat. Laden balls slap your chin and an amalgam of sloshing and gagging bubbles from the inundated scene in your mouth. Obscene noises cloud your ears. You can only lean on the support of the bed and take every brutal, solid thrust. His groans accelerate, “You’re—hngh—droolin a little bit, huh, princess. Haah—is it t'much for you, hm? T-tell me baby, fuck.”

It really is. It’s so intense; eyeliner smudged across your face, tears shimmering, drool coating your puffy lips and his cock rubbing your voice raw. He uses you like a fleshlight and your panties are soaked through. The twitching gets more apparent and he channels a string of curses as his hips lose coordination. “On your f-face or—ungh, your mouth. Choose darlin'.” You respond by staying still, looking at him with what little eyesight you have through cloudy tears.

“Such a pretty comeslut” he moans, “Don’t be wasteful—hah-ah—you’re gonna be soo fucking good and swallow it all, okay?” He might as well be rambling to himself, mouthing off on questions you couldn’t possibly answer. His bangs stick to his forehead, and he emits an endless measure of moans and curses at the precipice. Hips stuttering, legs quivering sporadically, “(Y/N), m’coming, coming—ugh, fuck—oh fuck.”

You see the exact moment he disregards ego; head lulled back, lip sagging open while he chases the high. Guttural groans meander in the space, and he pumps enough come from his spit-soaked balls to coat your throat. You wince and fresh tears are stirred from the sheer amount you’re gulping. He lags and finally relaxes, twitching sensitively when you swallow with his half-hard length still inside. Then he shudders once more when he retreats.

Toji leans down to kiss you, wrapping tongue over tongue. You’d hope the kisses soothe your chafed throat, but to no avail. It’s not ideal that there’s a tingle in your knees, and the same position made your legs go numb. Your wrists burn as well, diagonal lines creasing your skin around the leather. Luckily, Toji scoops you and sets you rather gently on the mattress. That’s the extent of his kindness, however, as he begins shredding the straps from your dress. They snap with a pop, the sound of money going down the drain. The luxurious silk is torn from you and you’re indifferent. There’s an unquenchable need for him—everywhere, under you, inside you, however you can achieve closeness. “I need you. Now” he grunts.

He manhandles you on your stomach with your ass raised in the air. Cool wind brushes against the pounding fever between your legs, and the sopping lace hangs by a thread.

“Shit, you’re wet.” It’s obvious from the outside, drenched fabric a shade darker, fused uncomfortably to your pulsing pussy and reflecting on your plush thighs. He won’t take his eyes off it; he stares like he can eat through them. He peels the fabric back painfully slow, watching it furl into itself. “These just get ‘n the way.” Some slick leaves with it and slides down his hand, then he absorbs the main course.

Glistening, syrupy fluid blankets your pussy and forms cobwebs of mess around your inner thighs and taint. You’re so wet it’s uncomfortable, and you shift around on your knees trying to quell the inescapable throbbing in your clit. He spreads your cheeks apart, practically salivating, “Look at ya.”

Your windpipe was ripped from you, but you can scarcely hoarse “Stop staring.” His hot laughter sends shivers through you, but he holds you still before you can move forward. “Aww, too wet for your own good?”

“Must be so sensitive” he coos, veiled in feigned concern. The pad of his thumb hovers, damn near salivating. “Tell me where it hurts, darlin’.” He flicks gently over the bud and you flinch. “Here?”

He rubs calculated, unhurried circles on it. It doesn’t suffice—it couldn’t, because each time you lean to his touch, he recedes just a little. Because of course he wouldn't let you satisfy your desires without paying first. It’s maddening to almost get what you want and fall short repeatedly. You whimper pathetically, and he teases, “I know, darlin’, I know.”

“Hurry up already” you whine. He quickly lands a stern, stinging swat to your ass and you recoil. “No attitude. Had enough’a that.”

He positions two fingers at your glossy entrance, “Want help? Show me how bad ya want it.” You should’ve told him to go fuck himself, or at least you would have if you weren’t trembling with carnal hunger. You turn back to him glassy-eyed and he smiles—sympathy won’t work here. So you slope over his waiting fingers and glide them inside. They’re thicker than you thought they’d be. A delicious burn around the ring of your cunt from your walls stretching, it takes some adapting to get used to it.

Once you do, though, you’re bouncing on them knuckle-deep, coating his palm in juices sluicing down his wrist. He doesn’t move an inch, but he drags his digits in a ‘come hither’ motion that sends tiny sparks bursting through your body. The notion of fucking yourself on his fingers should’ve been obscene, but you can feel yourself climbing to the edge. You’re panting, wiggling your hips with buzzing stars in your vision at the way it scrapes and kneads your walls. “You can’t hate me that much. Suckin’ me up and I’m not even movin’” he taunts.

You don’t realize how loud you’re moaning, how your pussy talks louder than you do, sloppily sliding and squelching. “Fuck—you’re so messy. Where’s your resolve, huh? Nothing mean to say?”

“Hah-ah” You clench rapidly, heartbeat in your ears. Until your stuttering heart and legs get worse, and you’re losing momentum. Your muscles burn from the inside out like a tiring workout, and you can’t keep up the pace that would’ve attained ecstasy. Just like that, it’s ripped away from you.

And you cry.

Hot, frustrated tears spill down your cheeks and you stop moving. He removes his wrinkled fingers. One side of the mattress sinks near you, and he thumbs the tears from your blushed cheeks and nose, your dazed lashes and pouty lips. “S’okay.” He pecks the corner of your eye, prompting a tear he samples. “Done fightin’ me?”

You nod absentmindedly. “What do you want?” It’s simple, but you make eye contact with him. Jaw clenched, huffing as if he’s battling his own assurance. Your eyes water again. “Please...”

You can’t read his face, but he leaves the mattress. It’s eerily quiet.

“Y’know just how to get me.”

A shattered gasp dies in your throat when you feel a warm, cruel stripe from your clit to your taint. Once, twice, his broken puffs fanning the flames. Both hands spread your legs wider and he nuzzles your folds, placing open-mouthed kisses, savoring your arousal. Then he immerses himself.

He put up a good farce for a while, but the crumbling began at his desperate, tangled tongue—ravenous and starving, he ate you like a decadent main course he’d never taste again. He was starved—slurping and sucking, releasing with a juicy smack and diving back in. He’s on his knees, grunting low at your drooling slit. He didn’t care about your quivering thighs, honeyed liquid building in layers on his chin, the weak cries you managed. None of it mattered. Because you—you were heady and sweet, and as he drowned in your scent, he wished to be breathless forever.

“S’fuckin’ good—oh, fuck, make a mess on my face.” He swats your ass, pointed tongue massaging your clit while he gropes the doughy flesh. It’s pliable in his hands and it gives him something to anchor while he drawls lecherous swipes over your swollen gooeyness. “Ngh—p-please—close-” Your stomach turns knot after knot, damp with sweat and sensing a rapid euphoria surging all too fast. Your mistake for announcing it, because he focuses his attention on a self-indulgent make-out session with your clit. “Come. Come on my face, princess—” You start to spasm, and the vulgar noises coming from Toji disperse in your ears.

“Toji” you moan, and sooner fall apart in his arms. White-hot pleasure courses through your convulsing cunt and a chain of violent aftershocks render you silent. What makes you even shakier, though, is that he doesn't stop.

He cleans his plate, imbibing the perfumed essence gushing from you. He peppers kisses around your contractions, deaf to your croaked sobs. If you weren’t bound, you’d push his head away. You attempt to use your foot to nudge him off, but you didn’t expect to make a dent in someone his size. He intertwines his hands with your sweaty ones, calm thumb swaying back and forth; it would be comforting if he wasn’t ruining you at the moment.

The intensity of his deliberate tongue only makes the aftershocks worse, and your hands start to jolt as you cry out, “Ahn--no more, p-please!” You feel his smile on your folds and he persists. His lapping gets more aggressive and so do your tremors, loud and unrestrained moans torn from you.

He finally unlatches, landing a final smack on your puffy pussy. Your heads swimming in an infectious trance, but you’re undeserving of a break as you whirl behind you and see him pumping his flushed cock. It stands at attention and even seems bigger than before, colored deep with need pearling at the divot.

“Need you or ’m gonna go crazy.” Toji keeps a firm hand at the base of your spine—it arches your back and shoves your words into the bed. He drags his bulbous head along your sensitive cunt, collecting the slick trickling onto the damp sheets before rimming the slit. A hint of fatigue crosses your face and he takes notice. “Heh, done already? We haven’t even started yet.”

The image of him entering you for the first time burns into your memory; his brows are knitted, bottom lip tucked under teeth and his breath hitches. If you were fucked out, he was getting there. He presses into your spine like he’s trying to prevent himself from coming on the spot, paused but lingering. Tunnel visioned on your soaked, bulging pussy stretching around him, snuggling his leaden length like a heated blanket. And you drink in the pain, a dulcet blaze engulfing you as sore muscles clench and unclench.

“You’ve been quiet, pretty thing” he muses, “Where’s your resolve, huh? Nothin’ mean to say?” With his veins adorning your walls and your mushy brain bouncing around in your head, you can’t bring yourself to talk shit. He pulls out completely, watching a mix of precome and wetness connect your bodies.

Suddenly, he bottoms out. “Ahn--fu-ah!” It shreds a whimper from you and he mocks your cracking moans, though he seems to be breaking, himself. The sharp snap of his hips contacts skin-on-skin, earning each sloppy slap echoing in the room. His lips are parted, swamped in infinite, unbridled lust. The carnal itch he’d been holding off on for weeks seeps through, satiating his most indulgent appetite. “O-oh, God, shit, look at the m-mess you’re making.” He drives out to his frenulum and shoves it back in with no mercy, no sign of slowing down. Long, deep strokes leaving you slack jawed and teary. Every drag of his dick imprints his name on your tongue, heavy balls smacking your tender clit.

“You hear that? Listen.” He goes quiet, to let the indecent plap plap plap’s resound. Your cheeks turn hot from humiliation. The side rail of the bed screeches the hardwood floors, and the belt buckle you’re secured to clicks occasionally.

“You’re my filthy slut” he grins, striking your rouged cheek. He’s rough, but you weren’t searching for friendliness, neither of you did. At your core, you knew it—Toji bullying himself into your cervix is a poison you’d drink habitually. A poison so incredibly captivating, you’re burning just to feel his crowning ardor.

He’s sandwiched between your swollen lips and he can’t get enough, virtually drunk from it. He winds another branding swat on your backside, then the other. The crackling fire of his hand thwacking delicate flesh merges pleasure with pain. “You've been such a brat all summer” he taunts, “Needed me to put you in your place, huh, you fucking slut?” Another mean swat, and he laughs crudely at you little gasp. “You like this shit, don’t you? Wanna be manhandled like a fucking whore.” Both cheeks are a severe fiery color, beginning to welt, but he resumes. And you’re drenching him. A creamy, gooey ring forming at the base of his dick, tracing translucent strings when he pummels your poor leaking pussy.

“M’sorry, so s-sorry” you babble. Apologizing for what? You don’t know, but the delirium spills truths you should’ve voiced ages ago. You're utterly incoherent; you might as well stay silent. “Aww, I know” he cloys, soft and sultry compared to the angry strokes he’s delivering. Shockwaves burst and fizzle on your clit and you flutter around him. Your ass ripples against him, hoarse voice funneling strings of curses, scrotum pummeling your overworked bundle of nerves. You want to come so bad it hurts, and you find yourself arching a little harder, spreading your legs a little wider—just begging him to use you entirely, to melt, become his.

“Pleasepleaseplease” you whimper, at the height of your intensity. Then sweltering, frenetic spasms suffocate Toji’s shaft as you ride the orgasm seemingly crashing into you. You shudder violently, pleading with your body to attain some level of poise. It has other plans, however, provoking you to flitting tears from dragged-out, toe-curling tremors. You grip him like a vice and he struggles to pull out, but when does he’s rubbing circles on your aching nub. You’re lost in a bottomless sensation, but you hear his voice in your dampened ears, “Mm, I got ya.”

The pressure on your wrists lessens, and you realize you can move them freely. Your arms are numb returning to a normal position, and you support yourself on your feeble elbows when you feel your legs being parted again. In the fleeting instant you’re allowed to settle, the vast trail of his tongue laps at your shuddery cunt. "P-please wait—ngh, I can’t-” you wail, and you turn to the commotion to see Toji, growling and devouring your silken arousal.

He’s absolutely corrupted, a feral glint in his blearily blinking eyes, chest heaving salaciously as he kneads your thighs. You paw at his hair, toiling to crawl away from his unsparing mouth but he follows. He releases you and you inch away from him. “Where ya goin’? Heh, tryna run?” he teases. You don’t get very far, because he grapples your waist and pulls you back. “Not done ‘till I say it’s done.”

Then he’s climbing on the bed with you, and you can do nothing but snivel in protest as he maneuvers you to hike your leg over his. He lays on his side, locking you in his embrace and smears his cock between your puffy folds. “Am I being mean to you?”, he slides in with ease, savoring the sweet mess spewing on cue, “’M sorry, I’m just an ‘angry old man’, after all.”

He pounds your chubby cunt with wild abandon. You feel each vast stroke pummeling your tumid core, squelching amidst your languid bodies. You can’t close your legs—as badly as you want to—and you’re forced to endure frantic twitching from your lit nerves. He strips your breasts of the flimsy lace bra and alternates among pinching your nipple and molding the valley to his palms. He twists it harsh and you muster a pathetic babble, to which he laughs—mocking and unhinged, “My poor baby, you can’t handle it anymore.”

Anymore was an understatement, it was overwhelming—to a degree that you’d gone quiet, enveloped in vehemence. You're scratching up his bicep with the other tangled in the sheets, knuckles turned white and your head thrown back. You want to push him off, but you’re milking his stuttering hips, drawing him closer. It isn’t enough and it’s too much. “F-fuck, it’s so swollen” he moves from your chest to your vulva, “I can touch right? Y-yea, you don’t mind.” His intoxicating voice is at a whisper in your ear, laying like liquor in your cotton-filled mind. With his cock dragging against your walls and hammering your g-spot, mercilessly circling his pads on your clit, eliciting every short “ah, ah” from your swollen lips, you’re far from combative.

He precisely rolls his hips and it’s unbearably hot, broken mewls fleeing you. Your mouth sags, drool shameless down your mouth as he kisses your cervix without trying. He wraps his hand around your throat, boring into your teary eyes. You can’t escape his overbearing presence, isolated from everything besides his eye contact. He is everything.

“Who’s pussy is this?” He gradually squeezes tighter and you pule in response. Since that didn’t work, he accentuates the words with every tantalizing thrust:

“Who’s”

“Pussy”

“Is this?”

You narrowly choke out, “Your pussy”, and like something snapped his rhythm get faster, nastier. The asphyxiation reaches you brain and floods you, aswoon on a pillowy cloud. He’s faltering, pumps getting sloppier, “Thaaat’s right, ‘nd I’ll use this pretty pussy whenever I need.” His stomach flinches but he doesn’t stop chasing that high, eyes thoroughly glassed, “’N you’re gonna be a good girl and take it—ha, f-fuck—be a good girl, o-okay?” Your pupils retreat to the back of your head, and you arch off the bed as your body begins to tremble. He’s glued to you, “One more, let it out f’me. Please, fuck, I need it—hah—need you to come on my dick—”

Your breath gets stuck in your throat, and you unravel. A stream of liquid coats the blanket and you’re speechless as you convulse uncontrollably, legs betraying you for strong spasms. You go limp but Toji props you up, bucking his hips when his own legs start to jolt. “That’s a good girl—Ohh yes. Y-you're so good f'me, princess. Coming—hahh—gonna come all over your pretty cunt—”

His balls tighten, and he manages some slushy, vile pumps before he pulls out. He spurts all over your tummy and hypersensitive vulva, painting it in thick white layers. He persists, groaning until he’s fully hollow, emptying his sack in globs. His staggering pants and shaking reduce to hitching, and he relaxes your exhausted weight. You weep softly, clinging to him as he presses selfish kisses from your lips to your wet lashes. He caresses your cheek, sweaty and disheveled in the dim light. Then your eyesight starts to blur.

Your sight peels back, permitting warm sunlight basked over the bed. It takes a split second to notice you’re resting on pillows not nearly as comfortable as yours, and the wood paneling was uncharacteristic of your assigned room. It takes another second to notice your galled throat, stinging backside, and the arm loose on your naked waist. You peer over your shoulder, to that mop of ink sprawled on the pillow. He looks peaceful, though you’re not sure how you slept soundly when he snores like a brute.

You slip from his arms to sit up. The floor’s freezing, but by the time you get to stand you’re pulled back into the covers. Entangled in limbs, you gaze at Toji, who still has his eyes closed. His face appears softened up close. There’s a small scar near his hairline that you hadn’t spotted. You trace the scar, outlining it to the one on his lip. He nips your finger.

“I wanna sleep” he grumbles.

“Then you should’ve let me leave”

“No.” You card your fingers through his hair, and he sighs into it. A fine gray strand peaks out amongst the rest. “You’re turning gray, old man.”

“The way I had you last night, I wouldn’t say ‘old man’.” Your remembrance makes your ears hot and you clasp a hand over his mouth. He laughs and pecks it, “You’re leaving today. Let’s get you packed up” he muffles.

Little did he know, you’d talk to your father that afternoon, asking to stay for a couple more months. The countryside welcomed you—and what a humbling experience it was.

#jjk toji #jjk x reader #jjk #toji fushiguro #fushiguro toji #toji x reader #toji smut #jujutsu kaisen toji #toji x you #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk smut

1K notes · View notes

maliro-t · 7 days ago

Text

The highlight of Veilguard for me is the relationship between Solas and Rook- and I don't know how to write about this on the internet without being acutely aware of other peoples' criticisms (such as there not being enough of it)- so I'll just say up top that I'm not actually intending this as a refutation of any of those. I just want to talk about my experience with the game and why I like it so much, which will probably make obvious where I disagree with some reoccurring critiques I've seen. *

The thing about Solas in this game is that he plays the role of the trickster perfectly. As much as Fen'Harel is a myth or a persona, and the stories we know of him invented or twisted, his role in Veilguard feels like it could slot in so, so easily with the myths, and in many ways directly parallels them. He is sinister and noble, monstrous and sympathetic, ruthless and compassionate, all at once. He spends the game trapped and humbled but can be almost gleefully condescending at times. He conflates outsmarting an enemy with being right, even as he plays the long-suffering martyr, tortured by countless mistakes. He falls easily into the role of advisor but is quick to note your foolishness. To sneer and declare the problem yours and yet still impose upon you an appraisal of your conduct.

But more than any of that, for most of the game, he's...passive. Dormant. He seems to make no moves, other than as a glorified consultant, despite starting as the main threat.

In Blood of Arlathan, when he finally rears his head again as major a player on the board, it's with a gallant offer of help. As an ally. He is exactly what you need, right when you need it, and you don't even have to ask him to be. And- because you don't have constant access to him, you maybe haven't even considered him an option!

He feels extremely intentionally sparing to me before this in service of a) making you think you're the one with power over him and b) causing you to forget he might contribute at all, so that when he finally does, it seems wholly benevolent. It comes in a moment where your goals are exactly aligned, and indisputably noble.

It's a waiting game. A classic of his, harkening back to stories we've heard time and again about Fen'harel and traps.

As Felassan tells it in the Masked Empire:

Fen'Harel was captured by the hunting goddess, Andruil. He had angered her by hunting the halla without her blessing, and she tied him to a tree and declared that he would have to serve in her bed for a year and a day to pay her back. But as she made camp that night, the dark god Anaris found them, and Anaris swore that he would kill Fen'Harel for crimes against the Forgotten Ones. Andruil and Anaris decided that they would duel for the right to claim Fen'Harel. He called out to Anaris during the fight and told him of a flaw in Andruil's armor just above the hip, and Anaris stabbed Andruil in the side, and she fell. Then Fen'Harel told Anaris that he owed the Dread Wolf for the victory and ought to get his freedom. Anaris was so affronted by Fen'Harel's audacity that he turned and shouted insults at the prisoner, and so he did not see Andruil, injured but alive, rise behind him and attack with her great bow. Anaris fell with a golden arrow in his back, badly injured, and while both gods slumbered to heal their wounds, Fen'Harel chewed through his ropes and escaped.

He goads his enemies into fighting each other for his benefit. Anaris, who had hunted him, succeeds with Fen'Harel's advice, exploiting a weakness he could only see with his aid. In turn, Anaris himself is left exposed. The victory goes to Fen'Harel, who has now dispatched two enemies at once and cleverly won his freedom.

He who was both Creator and Forgotten One. Who could walk amongst both as kin, and who in the end turned his back on them all.

Another tale:

The god Fen'Harel was asked by a village to kill a great beast. He came to the beast at dawn, and saw its strength, and knew it would slay him if he fought it. So instead, he shot an arrow up into the sky. The villagers asked Fen'Harel how he would save them, and he said to them, 'When did I say that I would save you?' And he left, and the great beast came into the village that night and killed the warriors, and the women, and the elders. It came to the children and opened its great maw, but then the arrow that Fen'Harel had loosed fell from the sky into the great beast's mouth, and killed it. The children of the village wept for their parents and elders, but still they made an offering to Fen'Harel of thanks, for he had done what the villagers had asked. He had killed the beast, with his cunning, and a slow arrow that the beast never noticed.

Felassan is everywhere in the Crossroads, in memories, in regrets, in notes that speak to a time you can barely fathom and traces of a friendship that is never once brought up by Solas directly (to my knowledge at least). I think Felassan serves a lot of purposes; he's a window into history, into Solas' mind and ideals, someone who challenges moments of ruthlessness but is loyal, an advisor who keeps Solas grounded even as he pushes him to become something larger than he is, a lingering notion of a loss that you can never really see the full scale of, and so on. And I think, too, that he's written carefully to be a meaningful presence from the rebellion without explicitly spoiling what eventually happens to him, which I wouldn't be surprised if was a legit consideration made for people who might go back and read the Masked Empire after dav lol- in the same way that Trespasser only really spoils the book if you already know what happens.

But for me, every note signed with his name is almost a tongue-in-cheek warning about what's to come. Felassan. A slow arrow, fired apparently mockingly into the sky, only to strike true when it's least expected. A solution executed with neither kindness nor explanation, serving first and foremost the interests of the one who fired it. Felassan's presence in the game ever so slightly encodes a reminder of who you're actually dealing with and what his core tenants are, whether as an ally or an adversary. You only know if you know, but it doesn't seem an accident to me that this reoccurring name of a general who shaped himself in honor of the Dread Wolf's unorthodox cleverness is so key to these traces of Fen'Harel's past, despite, again, never directly being discussed.

Anyways, to Rook. First, I gotta give a shoutout to Bryony Corrigan, whose voice I used for mine- she honestly made the game for me, especially in moments where I felt unsure of it. I love Rook, I love how they're written, and I love how they're performed. While a complete blank slate protagonist can be really fun, I find putting myself as a player in conversation with limitations given by the game really fun and interesting, and often surprising! And I do feel there's still plenty of flexibility.

My perspective on the relationship between Rook and Solas in Veilguard is specific to how I played of course, and I haven't seen other versions of their dynamic at this point to compare so I can't speak to them. But my experience was as such:

I didn't come into the game wanting to intentionally antagonize him. If he rose at me, I rose at him- and those moments of tension were really, really fun. But I tried to accept what he gave me with a fairly open mind. Skepticism, sure, but also the knowledge that ultimately, we both wanted Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain gone, and he knew them better than I did.

It was really gratifying, then, to see our rocky partnership evolve over time into what seemed like a genuine respect. But it didn't really feel straightforward to me either. For example, the conversation before Weisshaupt held a lot of weight for me: listening to him tell that chilling tale about undermining an enemy with persistent laughter and finding that 'Do whatever it takes to remove those who oppose you' was something we came out aligned on was.... There was an element of foreboding to that. Like, I had found myself actively trying to impress him here! And feeling good when it seemed like I had, but uneasy about how I had done it, even when I agreed with what I'd said.

And of course, after that comes Arlathan. Solas' big hero moment. This is the point in the game where our alliance finally felt comfortable to me. The conversation in the fade after was the first time that it really seemed like we were on even ground. And the game- not just Solas- told me here outright that I had earned his respect! After that, I didn't consider betrayal a possibility for a moment. Honestly, I barely even considered him an antagonist at all, because he had become a partner instead! I was expecting something clever down the line, but I wasn't worried about it hurting me. Our disagreements had been set aside, and the goal of his that I had initially opposed had been so thoroughly usurped I had forgotten that he was even pursuing it. And yes, that's perhaps naivety on my part, but I was so distracted by that not at all being the main plot that I forgot that it actually still was. Which is the whole point, right? He waits until your head is turned the other way to strike.

All this to say, my reaction when you kill Ghilan'nain and Solas uses the instability of the Veil to force you into his prison went beyond shock and confusion. It wasn't until well into his villain monologue that I was able to accept that he had betrayed me at all- having been thus far trying desperately to convince myself that the sequence I was seeing was Elgar'nan playing mind games in retaliation, and not actually Solas.

That prison moment is his Slow Arrow. You are Anaris to Elgar'nan's Andruil, the dagger the chink in her armor, and Ghilan'nain's death the golden arrow striking you in the back.

The wolf chews its leg off to escape the trap.

And I should say, I was coming at this all from the meta perspective of someone who loves Solas and empathizes with him and has never seen him as irredeemable or evil- and I, the player, who believed that all game and is ultimately satisfied with the resolution I got- felt hoodwinked as fuck in this moment lmao!!

There's a line in the prison that Varric has about it being easier for Solas to play the villain when he knows he's causing harm- so I do think he plays up his sinisterness here on purpose. But it's such a slap in the face coming straight off of "You have earned the respect of the Dread Wolf." A true and profound betrayal, at least for me.

And it doesn't stop there! His trickster maneuvers and half-truths aren't done until the credits roll. I love that when you meet again, he is nothing but apologies. He makes every concession- that Varric was a good man, that every victory in this fight has been yours, that he needs you and not the other way around, that he was wrong and made mistakes and betrayed people who never deserved it. And of course, we know from experience at this point that this won't stop him from doing it again anyways. But he never holds back from placing the blame on himself. Agreeing with you. Telling you you're right, and that Elgar'nan must be stopped. He only ever says things that are true. Things that are aligned with your point of view.

"[The veil] will never come down by my hand." Well, yes. Because it will fall on its own when Elgar'nan is dead. You won't hardly have to do anything at that point, Solas, will you?

It doesn't matter if Rook isn't falling for it, because if they don't accept his partnership, they lose! That's it! It's the same as it was at the start, but with the added sting of knowing it probably won't work out in your favor this time.

I remember before launch John Epler saying that Solas sees himself in Rook, which really echoes throughout the whole game for me. There are some ways you could say Solas seems opposite to Rook- and of course this can wax and wane depending on roleplaying choices, but the central conceit of Rook as Varric's recruit is that they are a specialist in being willing to act. And on the surface at least, that's kind of counter to Solas' Slow Arrow, right? Blunt force versus delayed gratification. But not entirely! Because every backstory we have for Rook revolves around a kind of heroism that is unorthodox enough to have left you ultimately punished for it. Like yeah, yeah, you saved some lives.... The optics were kinda bad though, so maybe you could go on a sabbatical for a while?

Rook is, from the start, an unconventional and unsung hero, admonished by some for ruffling feathers that they shouldn't have in pursuit of a noble goal. Not unlike Fen'Harel.

I find, too, that there's kind of a nesting doll of parallels around Rook and Solas as foils that the whole story hinges on:

We see Solas, his regrets plastered on every wall, each of them tied to Mythal. At every turn he seems to warn her that this is not the right path, but he follows her down it anyways, until he is left with nothing but an overwhelming need to fix what they have broken.

We see Felassan, who still wears Mythal's vallaslin on his face, challenging Solas' judgement and methods, but still standing by him through the rebellion, after the Veil, for however many thousands of years they slept. Ultimately, in the Masked Empire, the thing that makes him falter is his admiration for someone else's pursuit of freedom. His admiration for Briala.

"I suspect you'll hate this, but she reminds me of-"

Solas is Rook. Solas is Briala. Upstarts, flawed defenders, people who are made into leaders because of their willingness to fight for something. Who see injustice and cannot rest.

Solas is Felassan, the devoted general. One who pushes against his orders but cannot deny them. Someone who loves the cause, but more than that is dedicated to the person who champions it. A voice of reason who, in the end, turns away.

Solas is Mythal, a pragmatic leader, responsible for uncountable deaths. Someone who has relied on partners and power structures that have led her down a dark path, partners whose mistakes in their pursuit of power have become her own. Partners who in the end betray her.

Solas is trapped in his regrets because they are not all his. He struggles with having been failed and with how he has failed others, and in his mind the two become conflated. He carries these contradictory roles on his back- perpetrator and victim, betrayer and betrayed- and cannot see how to overcome them. He is ultimately freed by Mythal's absolution because the foremost factor in his crusade is not belief but guilt.

The ends have to justify the means, because there is no other way he can live with himself. And at every step, he is trying to redeem Mythal as much as he is trying to redeem himself.

He did not want a body, but she asked him to come. He wanted to give wisdom, not orders. I will always follow where you go.

He left a scar when he burned her off his face.

It was all for her. It was always for her.

Solas' duplicity is unending, but so is his devotion. And there is such an earnestness to a Rook, always betrayed, that sees and empathizes with that and uses it to free him.

* I will say that during the game I was definitely wishing you could show your hand to him a little more and press him about his memories prior to the endgame (and separate from this I have quibbles with the impact of some of those memory reveals- like wrt the delivery just not feeling as weighty as I would like. The payoff is absolutely still there in the end, it just felt to me like they were too nonchalantly getting a ton of info out that had to be established moving forward, despite these being like earthshattering reveals that people have Correctly (!!!!) theorized about for up to 15 years). That being said, in retrospect it would have lessened the impact of the finale to have pressed Solas about, for example, his relationship to Mythal prior to absolutely pulling the rug out from under him with it at the 11th hour. And additionally, it's a structural nightmare because you can uncover the memories at almost any point in the story, and you don't have constant access to Solas to chat with him about them. Which you shouldn't imo, in service to the story being told!! But it's also true that early on I found scenes with Solas super gripping, and scenes with my team often...not. And that was initially disheartening, but developed positively over time on all fronts once the game didn't have to worry about setting things up. So, I did wish for more here at first, but I've revised my opinion now that I can see the whole arc.

#ok one fucking gigantic solas post to dump some thoughts and feelings and analysis out #veilguard spoilers #it speaks #vir dirthera #long post

256 notes · View notes

alicerosejensen · 1 year ago

Text

Something about sin. Pt.1

Synopsis: Leon is ready to rip all these damn feelings out of himself and tell himself over and over again that he needs a good fuck. You're too young and too cute for him. Leon knows that he shouldn't even touch you, but then why are you tearing all the sinful essence out of him?

Warning: no erotica but it is mentioned; Older!Leon; Innocent Reader; Fem/reader; age difference; Leon is tormented by his conscience; Old man/young girl; Mentions of sex; in fact (in this chapter) the reader does not view Leon as a love/sexual interest; The reader is the daughter of another DSO agent.

A/N: I apologize for any mistakes. I really like the idea of dark Leon, but I don’t want to make him look like a bastard).

Feedback is welcome. If you want to point out mistakes or scold me, please do so in a gentle manner.

Part 2

This was wrong...

But 'Wrong' is not the word that could describe how he feels every time he sees you. One slightest appearance and Leon immediately feels like Humbert from Nabokov’s novel “Lolita,” who ruined the life of a little girl, well, the only difference is that you seem to be 19-20 years old, and not 14. Actually, it’s already wrong to want you, given that huge fact that you...don’t give him any reason.

You don't wag your pretty ass in front of him, you don't wear revealing clothes, and damn you're a victim of his sinful thoughts! When the fuck did this start?

The day he saw you might have been the right answer. This was the day when his colleague, the only one in the DSO besides Hannigan and Helena, sympathized with him and believed that what was standing in front of him was not a cold-blooded killer of the president, but the same Leon who would rather take a bullet and give his life than kill the one he was supposed to protect. The clarification of all the circumstances and the justification of his innocence dragged on for a long time, maybe that’s why your father then simply wanted to show an act of friendship and support by inviting him to a family dinner? Returning back, Leon thinks that it would be better if he went through hell again.

Leon immediately realized that the dinner was arranged primarily for him. Fried chicken with sides, a light salad, your mom made appetizers and even made a casserole. One is too many for him. The icing on the cake was when your father opened an expensive bottle of wine. He immediately felt awkward about this, after all, who was he to be bothered with so much, but you...

"Mr. Kennedy, what do you want? Maybe a salad? The thin sound of your voice almost made him feel weak. Your beautiful hands held the salad bowl, and almost as if on cue, you were ready to fill his plate with whatever he wanted. And those doe eyes looked at him so sweetly.

Leon could have sworn that at that moment some kind of blessing...or curse came down to him. He doesn't even remember what you were wearing. Some kind of brown blouse with jeans? He didn’t even pay attention to it, his eyes were completely focused on your pretty face. It was rubbish. You yourself were old enough to be his daughter and, as was said earlier, you didn’t even give him a hint to think that you were not indifferent to him. Actually, at dinner, when you were sitting between your parents opposite him, Leon saw how uncomfortable you were. You ate almost nothing and didn’t say anything, and an hour later you ran upstairs to your room, citing the fact that you hadn’t finished some task yet.

And your father quickly let you go, so you quickly jumped up the stairs like a rabbit, running away from his insidious gaze.

Maybe he just needed to let off some steam, he decided. In fact, it is not very often that there are women in his house who can spend at least a night with him. Last time it was Ada, and sex with her was too rough and fast. He cum almost as soon as she found herself in his arms, and for some reason Leon at that moment was not thinking about her, but about how it would anger Simmons, who believed that Kennedy was not worthy of her. However, it was true.

It seems like it's starting to become a habit, wanting women he doesn't deserve. At least Ada herself comes to him and Leon knows that she will not demand anything from him, they have never even had dinner together, and what did they do together besides sex, battles and flirting? That's right, nothing. But he has even less interaction with you.

Ada's black hair is too short, unlike yours, which could fall all over him if you were sleeping on his chest in this bed right now. But Ada never laid her head on his chest and always left unnoticed, leaving behind a barely perceptible trail of perfume. You wouldn't have left, Leon thinks, looking at the ceiling, ignoring the brown gaze of the woman he's been crazy about for so many years. Why is he comparing you and Ada at all? Two women who don't look like each other at all, which makes damn sense. You don't have to be like this! Your father would rather put his neck under the axe than allow his daughter to serve in the DSO or any other service, but in any case, you do not aspire there.

As a result, a woman will always understand when someone else settles in her man's head and Ada just smiles slyly moving closer to him, but all Leon hears is the rustle of a blanket.

"Well, who is she?"

As always, there was no hint of jealousy. Ada is the epitome of calm and composure, but Leon really doesn't know what to answer her.

After all, you are nobody and at the same time you have planted strong roots in his head.

"She?"

He pretends not to understand her, but Ada has long figured him out. For her, he will always remain a rookie cop.

"Yes." She still smiles, resting her head on her hand while lying on her side, "Who is this 'Jolene' What took my puppy away from me?"

Leon grins, but at the same time he feels an unpleasant ache in his chest from her words. Puppy... of course, he remained that way, and Ada was good at getting to the bottom of it, and yet she did not say that he was her lover, because there is no love between them as such.

"There is no 'Jolene' in my life and it is unlikely that there will be," he said wearily, reaching out to hug her, but contrary to expectation, he did not feel the desired warmth, and the itch inside grew like a wild beast intending to get only one thing - you.

In the morning, Ada disappeared as usual, and Leon was not even surprised. But instead of a paper airplane with a lipstick imprint on the kitchen table, he found a small note, folded in half, where only one thing was written: “I think you really need a family. You should think about it."

Maybe Ada really was right, but if she knew your age, she would obviously look at him with bewilderment, thinking that somewhere on the mission he was hit hard on the head. On the other hand, maybe she would have sarcastically joked that the older a man gets, the more he wants to have a young girlfriend instead of the old one, although he wouldn’t dare call Ada old.

Besides, you were supposed to remain only in his head and Leon could only hope that one day he would simply forget about you. For example, fucking with a random girl from a bar, but bad luck, against his own will, closing his eyes, Leon still wanted you. As if you were the one clinging to his back with your nails, leaving bloody streaks marking him and screaming his name. Complete crap.

You live your quiet life, not knowing what a zombie is, in complete material wealth and parental love. When your second meeting with Leon happens, he sees that you are dressed in some kind of wide sundress and are trying to drag something heavy alone, although dad strictly ordered you not to do this, but you, as a caring daughter, did not listen to him because wanted your father to do something other than hard work instead of carrying those heavy boxes out of the barn. The fact that you yourself were barely coping, not very successfully, was ignored by you.

Leon couldn't look at it calmly. He himself told you twice to leave the boxes, but you just snorted offended at him.

"Spoiled girl"

You want to prove something to someone, although this will most likely harm your health and force your father to fork out for doctors and medicine, so Leon, not paying attention to your snorting face, took the load from you and carried it into the house, leaving you with only light boxes.

In fact, no matter how hard Leon tries to convince himself that he just needs a break, your game keeps cutting him like a knife. If he were 21 years old again and he could get to know you before Raccoon, you could hum beautiful lyrical poems about how a boy fell in love with a girl and the whole world around him changed. As if you could be those two stupid lovers who burn alive in their love until finally they become disgusted with each other, although more and more often Leon realizes that in his loyalty and devotion only he would disgust you, not you from him. He would be your devoted puppy, as he has always been for Ada.

You would be everything to him.

Or already?

Is it right to look at a young girl like that when he is almost an old man himself? Why don't you have some annoying boyfriend with whom you can constantly text and chat on the phone thinking that this is the love of your life? And why can't he just throw you out of his head?!

"Mr. Kennedy" the way his last name comes off your tongue makes him almost rush to you and take you somewhere far away where no one would find you. However, Leon is disgusted by the idea that he will be the cause of fear and tears of an innocent girl who is completely innocent of what is happening in his unhealthy head. To tell the truth, it's not even lust… No, of course he feels physically attracted, but first there is some kind of dog instinct maturing inside to protect you from EVERYTHING and EVERYONE.

Then you started awkwardly calling his name and he just became Leon, always smiling when you ask him for something or just out of politeness ask how he is, whereas in fact you don't really care what's going on in his life. At least that's what he thinks, not really knowing what thoughts are going through your head.

Leon can't possibly know that you want someone older. Just a little colder so that you can become someone's secret, because even though you're young, you're of age. And yet you're watching these weird love movies that Leon thinks are sweeter than the cheapest chocolate and probably the books on the shelves have similar plots. A love to fight for. Disgusting rubbish, really.

But your smile is getting softer and Leon feels like he's giving up.

But Ada really understands that she is finished. Your beauty is incomparable, and even though she smiles in Leon's face, her heart also breaks apart when he says another woman's name in a dream. Huh, women…girls. How easily were you able to get hold of someone she's been involved with for so long.

In fact, it's a shame and Ada also understands that the years of youth are merciful to you, unlike her, and in fact you grabbed Leon's leash and there's no point in begging to find another man. Besides, Leon himself has always been eager for normality, for what he can build with an ordinary civilian girl. You will be a faithful girl to him, and he will be yours.

Someone else always comes. Younger and more beautiful. In Leon's case, meeting someone like you was also a well-deserved reward, so their nights are becoming increasingly rare and have long lost their passion. The only thing Ada doesn't understand is why you won't pull the leash on yourself. However, this question quickly disappears when she finds out that Leon stubbornly drowns his feelings in whiskey, in her and other women, who, though few, still have them. And then, like a faithful dog, he runs up to you just to wag his tail at the sight of you.

In the end, Ada doesn't even back down, but just waits for Leon to draw a line between them that can no longer be crossed. And waiting for you to lie on these soft pillows instead of her, like his beloved princess, or climb onto his lap and his lips will leave kisses on your neck. Leon deserves you. He deserves his share of happiness in a world where the government has turned him into a perfect weapon against bioterrorism.

Leon's touch is becoming more and more relaxed and you are not afraid of his wide chest, given your size difference. He could have easily swatted you, but for God's sake, Leon S Kennedy would rather put a bullet in their brains than hurt you. You hug him, listening to the pounding in your chest when he gives you an obscenely expensive Christmas present and drinks hot chocolate with you. No, Leon likes sweets, but in moderation. All those bright ribbons, the Christmas tree… not for him, but if you were in his house now, he would decorate his apartment for you and then hug you for several hours, nuzzling your head hoping that his phone would remain quiet.

Leon wants to put you in his bed, he's even ready to be your sugar daddy and get punched in the face by your dad knowing that you're going to grab onto him, but he just wants you. Like a stupid old dog who wants to be petted by a new owner. And Leon is sure that he will die of longing if you don't do it. The fact that you still don't have a boyfriend is just comforting, but anxiety grows when your father tells him that he's worried that his beloved daughter isn't interested in boys her own age.

"Anyone older?" your father says rhetorically while helping Leon fix his bike, "Buddy, I don't want an old man like you or me to become my son-in-law."

"But this way you'll have something to talk about," Leon grins, feeling that he has everything to step on the gas.

And he will take the risk again, even if it means a broken nose.

#leon kennedy #leon scott kennedy #leon s kennedy #resident evil #leon kennedy x reader #leon x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #resident evil x reader #leon kennedy x you #reader #leon kennedy resident evil #resident evil fanfiction #leon resident evil #leon scott kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x fem!reader #leon s kennedy x you #resident evil leon #older leon kennedy #Older!Leon s Kennedy

631 notes · View notes

causenessus · 4 months ago

Text

happy birthday. | oikawa t.

oikawa x reader (female reader implied, one use of word girlfriend)

written in 2nd person

"i wanna see what makes my life and all the little things, i wanna see the mountains in view and the part when i meet you <3" from when i meet you by hollow bastion

word count: 2.5k words (headcannons & little fic <3)

happy birthday to the boy whose been with me for 4+ years <3 longer than anyone else <3 all sweet toothrotting fluff!! not edited bc i'm really tired goodnight :)

contrary to popular belief, tooru does not hype up his birthday

he never tells anyone it’s coming up and he doesn’t always do something big for his special day

he’s grown a *tiny* bit more mellow since high school, from when he did always make a big deal out of it

fans continue to send in heaps of mail but like the actual day itself, he doesn’t really pay any mind to it

there’s two reasons for this:

now that he has you, he doesn’t care much for others

as long as he gets to spend the day with you, even if no one else wished him a happy birthday or gave him something he’d be happy

second of all, he likes things to be genuine

with popularity has come a lot of shallowness from others, and he’s had to put up many of his own fronts

so he doesn’t want hundreds of people messaging him happy birthday, he only really cares to hear it from his close circle of friends

and it’s no problem if he doesn’t receive a message from one of those friends, he doesn’t expect people to know everything about him (a big change from high school, he’s very proud of it)

it’s just something that he realized after graduating high school. after his last year and the underwhelming end to his high school volleyball career after the spring high playoffs, he realized that life was not all about getting as far as you can on a straight path; sometimes you take turns that diverge you from the main path a little bit, but you still keep moving forward, and sometimes you end up finding something on that little path that makes it all worth it <3 (with age comes wisdom, right?? don’t tell him that, it makes him sound old 🤭)

after all, that’s how he found you <3

at the airport waiting to fly to argentina, he just couldn’t get enough of you, even after spending the entire flight at your side.

and you were just as interested in him

he realized after your first date that he was always meant to be here. he had a restless, adventurous soul that hadn’t been satisfied in japan, and it had been fate to meet you while he was taking the next big step in high life.

and don't mistake his acceptance of where he is in life for laziness, he’s just as hardworking as before if not more, but he’s realized he doesn’t need to aim for perfection

and once he became more lenient on himself, he ironically became the best version of himself he’d ever been

with your support and love easing him through this new mindset and the bad days, he began to win medal after medal <3

you’ve been with him for it all. he wholly believes you were made for him, and he loves you so much

so the only happy birthday he cares to hear is from you

and if other friends wish him a happy birthday? he will thank them. he will say that he appreciates them and he means it, but nothing is as important as you

if you insist that he can’t stay at home with you the whole day and that he should celebrate with some of his friends, he’ll eventually comply

he likes to keep things small. it feels nice to choose to have a quiet day on a date dedicated to him with a small group of people

tooru and you had started the day together in bed. a summer in brazil had seemed appealing to you both; it was the perfect time and place for him to play volleyball on the beach by the sea and you were there to relax and keep him company. he had reconciled with shoyo, who you both had planned to meet for lunch to celebrate the day.

you had decided on the place after receiving input from both of them. tooru had been complaining for days about wanting lemonade, and shoyo had suggested somewhere small, open, and simple as opposed to an overcrowded fancy restaurant. you could easily get that experience just by walking down the hot streets of brazil.

the three of you had spent the afternoon inside a conditioned cafe. it was a cozy place, with lots of greenery and wide window walls to let in lots of sunlight. you had sat there for several hours, people watching and chattering, tooru rubbing circles on your thigh the entire time as shoyo and him recounted their time and experiences in high school and how they had traveled around the world since then.

by around four in the afternoon or so, shoyo had perked up, suggesting that they play volleyball which had riled up tooru, a smirk on his face as he teased the ginger, “oh? you think you can beat me if we play one on one, shrimpy?”

shoyo had grinned back, sitting up proudly and flaunting his sun-bronzed skin. tooru had gotten a little dark, too, but not nearly to the extent that shoyo had.

“you guys have fun sweating and running around in the sun,” you sighed, placing your hand over the one tooru had on your leg, “i’m going to go home.”

when tooru whined you hushed him with a finger to his lip, “you enjoy your time with shoyo. today is about you. i'll still be here when you guys are done playing.”

he gave you a slight pout but you knew you had won him over. he was never one to fight much, especially because he knows you only want the best for him, and he'd be lying if he didn't say he was excited to play against the orange-haired boy sitting across from him.

you had waved the two boys off as you split up after exiting the cafe, stopping by a bakery before running home. little did tooru know, this had been your plan all along and everything was going smoothly so far. shoyo was in on it too and had been assigned the job of distracting tooru while you got home.

tooru woke up with messages from his family, but none of his three closest friends. you’d seen the disappointment in his eyes although he tried to hide it, saying that they’d probably just text him later due to the big time difference between japan and brazil.

but in reality, they hadn’t messaged him because they had just arrived in brazil. they'd come to help you with decorations and to celebrate tooru, of course. you met the three at your door, each of them holding a bag or box with decorations and gifts inside.

“thank you guys for agreeing to do this with me, he’s gonna love it,” you smiled, opening the door and holding it open for the four of them to walk in.

“of course he will, he's gonna let out the most dramatic gasp ever when he sees something set up for him,” hanamaki said with an amused smile, slipping off his shoes.

“he’s gonna love anything, he’s never satisfied,” iwaizumi added with a roll of his eyes. “and he’ll probably complain that none of us texted him.”

“times never change,” mattsun whistled, stepping through the door last. “remember when we surprised him in the gym with the entire team? he wasn’t even happy until makki finally arrvied with the cake like an hour later.”

“you gave me the wrong address, that was not my fault! and he wasn’t happy until i got there because he was waiting for me, not the cake,” makki retorted and the rest of them had laughed.

you had met his old teammates from high school a few times before on visits back to japan, and tooru continued to keep in touch with them while he was overseas. most often, on late nights that neither of you could sleep, he would ramble to you about the national volleyball team iwaizumi had been putting together.

you had also exchanged phone numbers with the three boys after hitting it off with them, which had come in handy for planning this birthday. you all worked quickly to hang up decorations around the foyer and kitchen while the cake you'd bought earlier stayed neat and pretty in the chilled fridge.

all the while, shoyo kept you updated on tooru through texts. they were on the way back to the apartment now after shoyo had insisted on walking with him back home.

“he’s almost here,” you informed, unable to contain the excited smile on your face as you slipped your phone back into your pocket. “everyone ready? iwaizumi, will you get the lights, please?”

you all waited in the dark until you heard their footsteps approaching, the muffled sound of their voices through the wall of the apartment. you lit the candles on the birthday cake, the warm, flickering flames providing the tiniest bit of light in the dark room, illuminating the neatly iced cursive that read out "happy birthday tooru ♡ "

you heard his noise of surprise as the door swung open into the pitch black apartment before you stood up from your hiding spot behind the counter, “happy birthday, my love.”

“y/n? is this why you left early?” he asked, a smile full of love and adoration on his face, looking at the dimly lit cake on the table.

you hummed in response, wrapping your arms around his neck, giving him a kiss before you looked at shoyo and gave him a nod.

the lights came on overhead, making tooru squint at the sudden brightness before he nearly fell forward from a slap to his back.

“happy birthday, man,” mattsun grinned, stepping into his sight before he saw iwaizumi and hanamaki as well.

“you guys?—” he started, frozen in place in surprise at seeing the three boys in his apartment. “you guys came all the way here for me?”

“no," hanamaki replied sarcastically with a shrug before giving tooru a hug, "we just happened to be in the area, you know. i’m thinking of moving to brazil and decided to stop by.

tooru lets out an offended huff at the joke, crossing his arms as hanamaki steps back. “i can’t believe you guys are really here. and even more i can’t believe none of you guys texted me! i thought you all had forgotten, you could have at least sent a message so i wasn’t moping around all day.”

you and iwaizumi both roll your eyes at his dramatic complaint as matsukawa laughs, “aw, did you miss us?”

“and where’s the fun in that, dumbass? we thought a happy birthday in person would mean more to you, anyway,” iwaizumi speaks up, revealing the gift bag he’s been hiding from behind his back.

tooru gasps, practically melting at the sight as he steps closer to his best friend, “well, i guess you guys were right. this means the world to me, thank you so much for coming.” he takes the bag from iwaizumi before pulling him into a tight hug that lasts a few seconds, and says more between the two than hours of talking could. they haven’t seen each other in months, but they’re still just as close as they’ve always been.

“and,” tooru says, turning towards you with a smile, “thank you for setting this all up, y/n.”

the party lasts a few hours, with mellow music playing in the background as the six of you catch up over a few drinks before everyone decides it’s a good time to head out back to their homes, leaving the two of you to collapse into bed.

tooru is hugging you close, face nestled into the top of your chest as you comb your fingers through his hair and draw circles onto his back.

“did you have a good birthday?” you ask him, eyes closed as you both find rest in each other’s arms.

his shoulders relax with a deep sigh as he gives you a small nod, his face rubbing against your shirt.

“anything i can do to make it even better next year?” you talk softly, twirling his brown curls around your finger.

he hums in thought for a second before he peeks up from your chest, innocent brown eyes staring into yours. “more time with you next time,” he answers, mouth still muffled from your shirt.

“what?” you chuckle, rubbing the back of his head, “i was with you nearly the entire day, and we live together. you see me every day.”

“ ‘s not the same,” he whines, nuzzling his face into your body again, “and today didn't count, 'cause i didn’t get any alone time with you.”

you can’t help but smile at his sweet words, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of his head, “but today is your day, tooru. i want you to see as many friends as you can. because we all care about you, and sometimes you need to be reminded of that, mr. i-don’t-tell-anyone-when-my-birthday-is.”

his grip tightens on the back of your shirt, “yeah, but i don’t need any of that if i have you. you make me feel loved and cared for. your happy birthday is the only one i care about hearing.”

“is that so?’ you reply, returning to raking through his hair.

he gives you another nod before looking up, one of his hands trailing up your back and tangling into the back of your hair, pressing your head down to meet his lips. “mhm,” he hums against your mouth, “all i need is you.”

his lips trail down your jaw and then to your neck, making you laugh as he moves down your sternum before he returns to his original position, holding you close, his face buried into you. “well then, i’ll keep that in mind next year. i’ll make sure everyone texts you happy birthday whether or not they fly across the world and i promise we'll get some alone time, okay?”

he hums in acknowledgment of your words, wrapping his arms tighter around you. “what’re you thinking about?” you ask softly.

“nothing,” he mumbles, “i just feel really happy right now. i have the best girlfriend in the world that cares so much about me and plans out all my birthdays to make me feel loved. and we’re lying in bed right now and i’m just listening to her talk and i feel so comfortable. like next year we could just lie here all day and i’d be the happiest man ever.”

you laugh at his words and he likes the way he can feel it reverberate through your chest because of how close he is. “you’re sweet, tooru. i’ll keep talking until you fall asleep then, okay?”

“mmkay,” he responds happily, moving his legs around under the sheets to hook around yours, intertwining your bodies.

you press another kiss to his head, smiling the entire time, your heart full of love for the man, “and if it really means that much to you to hear it from me, i’ll say it again, too. happy birthday, tooru. and i love you so so much. you’re the best man i could ever have fallen in love with.”

138 notes · View notes

loves0phelia · 6 months ago

Note

Hi! Can I request a Zach Maclaren one shot? Him and reader are college friends. Zach invited them to go skiing with his family. But due to sudden invitation there's only one bed. Fluff (no smut pls)

One Bed

Summery: The request

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: grammar mistakes

A/N: Thank you xxx feel free to request whenever you want!

The chime of the bell above the door signals the entrance of a customer entering the coffee shop you worked at. Typically, your days were intense and you stayed alert to any new customer not to lose track but today it's slow and tranquil, so you don't feel the need to run immediately to the customer.

You're slowly cleaning the table to remove any crumbs left and the dirty cups of coffee, you thought you would leave the person to think about the order for a second but a pair of hands gripped your waist. “Boo!” A loud scream escaped your attacker's mouth in an attempt to startle you. Your heart leaped, and your body instinctively flinched. You quickly pushed away and jumped, what felt like feet away. "Zachary MacLaren, what the hell is wrong with you!" Your angry voice echoed off the walls of the shop as you yelled his full name. “Zachary?” He holds his stomach while bending over, laughing uncontrollably. “I hate you, you know that?” A small smile tugged at the corner of your lips despite you desperately trying to show your anger. “Hate me? I think you meant love” He smirked and playfully draped his arm around your shoulder. You giggled before pushing away from his embrace. “What do you want to order, Zach?” You made your way around the counter where the register was. “Nothing, I just wanted to make sure you were still coming to the ski trip” Gently, he placed his elbow on the counter and leaned down to press his chin against his hand while smiling up at you. “Of course, I'm coming, I'm not gonna miss the opportunity to see you fall on your ass” After your sentence Zach fake gasped. “I'll let you know that I'm an impeccable snowboarder. If someone falls it's gonna be you.” He starts to walk backward to the door of your workplace. “We’ll see about that Zach” “I'll come pick you up at your dorm room Friday after class alright?” You nodded before saying your goodbyes. “Wipe that smile off your face, girl,” Your boss' voice cut through the air, and you felt the heat rise to your cheeks. You hadn't realized the effect Zach had on you. You couldn't wait to spend the week with him and his family. … Friday, during class you weren't paying attention. All you could think about was your excitement for the upcoming trip a few hours later. When Zach came knocking on your dorm door as he had promised two days prior, you were already prepared. Your suitcase was filled with your essentials and you were ready to go. You both made your way to his house where the rest of his family was. He just needed to come get you and you would all be on your paths to the beautiful house next to the ski mountains. He opened the door and you were met with chaos. His mom and dad were running around with last-minute tasks and his sister was looking for snacks in the pantry for the road. There was also a boy around Avery's age sitting on the kitchen island with a BattleToad backpack. “Hey Malix, what are you doing here?” Zach asked him. “He's coming with us! isn't that awesome? Mom said I could bring a friend this year since you always bring Y/N” His younger sister answered for the boy and your cheeks flushed at her innocent comment about you. You and Zach were indeed glued to the hip, always following each other wherever you went “Since Avery is too young to sleep with a boy,” His mom interjected and his sister made a gagging sound, “I figured you and Y/n could share the second master bedroom while the kids take the separate rooms” The air in your lungs left your body as if you were hit by a train. You and Zach sharing a room? “Oh yeah that's fine” He answered casually with not one hint of hesitation in his voice. Throughout the entire ride to the chalet, you were pressed against him. His legs, much longer than yours, needed more space which made the both of you closer than ever. When you finally arrived at your destination you felt the air enter your lungs as if you hadn't taken a single breath since your departure. You along with the rest of his family entered the house, It was still just as pretty as the preceding years. It was massive and spacious. But also rustic with a touch of modern. You would kill to own a place like this one in the future "You coming?" Zach was already halfway up the circular stairs, his and your suitcase in hand. You nodded hastily and rushed to catch up with him.

He pushed open the two wooden doors revealing the bedroom you would both sleep in tonight and the rest of the week.

The room was spectacular, the queen-sized bed was filled with cozy pillows and soft blankets, and there was a fireplace in front of it as well as a TV, The big windows allowed the sun to shine brightly and make the room warmer.

“Are you sure this isn't your parent's room?” you asked with your voice a little bit trembly, you felt nervous, happy, shy?

“Oh, I'm sure” His lips turned into a big grin and he unexpectedly dropped your bags and ran into the bed. He jumped and landed with a loud “Oof” before snuggling inside the blankets.

“This is so much better than the crappy single beds!” he laughed. “Come on!” He motioned you to copy his previous actions and you couldn't help yourself. You ran and landed beside him, making you both giggle.

“Zach let's go skiing!” Avery barged into the room and yelled excitedly.

“Now? We just got here” he sat up prompting himself on his elbows.

“Pleasee I really want to show the mountains to Malix” She begged her brother.

“Alright” he agreed and she screamed in victory rushing downstairs to announce the news to her friend.

“Do you want to come with us?” He asks as he stands up from the criminally comfy bed.

"Of course," you nodded. In a swift motion, he grabbed your hand, pulling you up from the bed. You stumbled, landing face to face, chest to chest with him. For a moment, you both locked eyes before quickly jumping apart.

"Sorry," he chuckled nervously. All you could do was tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and dismiss him with a shy smile.

After a long evening snowboarding, you all returned home to find a warm meal prepared by his parents. The dinner was lively, filled with discussion and laughter.

And later that night, you cozied up in bed, content and warm.

“Hey, I made us some hot cocoa” You accepted the mug he handed you with a “thank you”, and took a sip. The chocolate taste was heavenly on your tongue.

You and Zach chose a movie on Netflix and watched it until you were both tired. You turned off the lights, extinguished the fire, and lay down together. You were facing his back and as if he read your mind he turned to face you. Even in the dark, you could see him looking at you.

“I'm sorry about earlier, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable.” He said calmly which made you shake your head disapprovingly.

“You didn't make me uncomfortable, Zach just nervous…”

“I'm so sorry I didn't mean to, really I just wanted to help you get up. I should have been more soft instead of pulling you like that, It was dumb of me-” he rambled and you cut him off.

“Not nervous in a bad way” you sighed desperately.

“No?” he asked confused.

"I… I like you, and I like being close to you, but it makes me a little nervous," you admitted, your voice trembling. When you were met with silence embarrassment flooded over you like a wave. Quickly, you hid beneath the blankets, wishing you could disappear from the face of the earth.

“Hey” His hands searched for your face in the blankets but failed.”Come back”

You slowly pulled the blanket away from your face, meeting his eyes once again. His warm hand gently rested on your cheek, offering a comforting touch.

“I thought you would never say it” Confusion filled you.

"Wait, what?" you asked, expecting an answer. Instead, his response was his lips pressing gently against yours.

As confused as you were, you kissed him back, which only made him press deeper. His hand slid to the back of your neck, taking your breath away.

His soft lips detached from yours and you took a small breath.

"I knew you liked me," he said, a cocky yet happy smile gracing his lips.

“What-!” His lips once again connected with yours to shush you.

“I like you too though” His smile grew against your lips and your heart grew in size. Turns out sharing a bed was the best thing that could happen to you and Zach.

#zach maclaren fluff #zach maclaren x reader #zach maclaren x y/n #zach maclaren #the other zoey #drew starkey fanfiction #drew starkey x reader #drew starkey #drew starkey x y/n #drew starkey x female reader #drew starkey fluff

142 notes · View notes

archiveikemen · 12 days ago

Text

"Dark If" Story Event: Chapter 2

This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection; expect mistakes, grammatical errors, and some creative liberties. All original content and media used belongs to Cybird. Please support the game by buying their stories and playing their games.

Read this before interacting

It had been several days since I came to the castle. … But my situation remained unchanged.

No matter how begged him to, the fairy refused to break the curse or even extend the deadline.

(I’m forbidden from leaving the castle too, so I don't have any other options…)

What hurt me even more was Ellis.

Ever since learning about his connection with Jude, I’ve started actively avoiding him.

(Just this morning…)

= Flashback Start =

Ellis: Good morning, Kate. I brought breakfast.

Ellis: I’ve got your favourite freshly baked bread with raspberry jam.

Kate: …

Ellis: … I don’t mind if you don’t talk to me, but please eat. I’m worried about you.

Ellis: You won’t have energy without water, nutrients, and sunlight…

= Flashback End =

Feelings of guilt welled up in me again when I recalled the sadness in his face as he left.

(I really do want to go back to being friends like we were, but I just can’t find the right chance…)

I wandered into the castle garden to clear my mind.

Looking at the briar made me think of him—

Kate: … Ellis…

I unintentionally called out his name.

In an instant, the briar in the garden rustled and crept towards me— suddenly, small white flowers bloomed from them.

(... It’s almost as though they’re trying to cheer me up.)

(I remember how I used to see briar as my friend.)

During my childhood, being a princess meant that I didn't have many people I could talk freely with and was hence often feeling lonely…

I’d always talk to the briar growing in the castle’s back garden.

(I’d tell it all sorts of silly things… like how much I loved raspberry jam or how the air smells after it rains.)

(... Come to think of it, I gave the briar a name too.)

There was once where a gardener tried to clear out the briar for being a nuisance, so I gave it a name to protect it.

“This is my friend! Don’t cut it away! It even has a name, it’s—”

(I… what did I name that briar again?)

I tried my best to recall… but in the end, I couldn't remember it at all.

Still, the flowers blooming from the briar were a beautiful sight and gave me the courage to apologise to Ellis for my recent attitude towards him.

Kate: I wonder where Ellis is right now…

Just as I muttered those words under my breath, the briar started stretching in one direction.

Kate: Are you… pointing me towards Ellis?

When I asked, half-convinced, more white flowers bloomed rapidly as though telling me that I was right.

Kate: Thanks, I’ll follow you.

Having grown accustomed to the peculiarities of the fairytale world, I followed after the briar.

…

(Oh, there’s Ellis… and is that Jude with him?)

Ellis: — Why don't you break Kate’s curse, Jude?

Ellis: She really wishes for you to.

Jude: Ha? Don’t ask me such stupid questions. I’m tryin’ to do somethin’ ‘bout her illness, ain’t I?

(Do something about my “illness”...?)

(The thing I have is a “curse”, isn’t it? … What illness is he talking about?)

Kate: What do you mean by that, Jude?

Jude: W-when did ya… were ya eavesdroppin’?

Ellis: Jude. Kate looks like she really wants to know, so just tell her about it.

Kate: Please do…!

Jude: …

Jude sighed… and began telling a truth I never knew.

Apparently, I had an incurable disease and my time was limited.

Jude learned of this by chance and in an attempt to help me, he cursed me so that I would fall into a deep slumber for 100 years right before my death.

Jude: After ya fall asleep, I’ll spend that 100 years searchin’ for a cure and pay back my debt.

Kate: So you were trying to help me… thank you for that.

Kate: But why didn't you clear up the misunderstanding earlier?

Judes … Says the daughter of the stupid King who won’t listen to a damn thing anyone tells him.

Kate: I-I’m sorry my father was rude…

Kate: … But I’m glad I found out about it now.

Kate: It means I won't have a misunderstanding towards you anymore… and I don’t have to think I’ve been “betrayed” by Ellis.

Ellis: … So does that mean we can go back to being friends?

Kate: If you’re alright with it, of course. … I’m sorry for treating you so coldly.

Ellis: I didn’t mind, so you don’t have to worry about that either.

Seeing Ellis’ smile at me like flowers blooming had my heart racing again.

— It felt like it was urging me to realise something, a certain feeling.

…

Later that night, after Ellis and I cleared up the misunderstanding between us and reconciled.

Ellis suddenly asked me a question after dinner.

Ellis: You don’t need Jude to break your curse anymore?

Kate: Of course not! The purpose of Jude’s curse is to keep me alive, after all.

Ellis: …

Kate: … Ellis?

Although I thought my answer was to be expected, Ellis looked surprised.

I began to worry if I had said something strange.

Ellis: If you’re fine with the curse not being broken…

Ellis: … Does that mean you still want to live?

Kate: …? Yeah. There are things I still have to do…

Although I had put it on hold for a while, I needed to find what was missing from this story and correct the twists.

(Oh… but if I fix the twist and return to my original world…)

(I won’t be able to be together with Ellis anymore.)

When I first came to this fairytale world, all I could think about was that I had to find a way back…

But along the way, I started feeling like I didn't want to leave. The main reason was Ellis.

(I want to spend more time with Ellis.)

(I want to eat delicious food with him, enjoy beautiful sights together… I’d even love to go on another journey with him.)

(I want to know more about Ellis. I want to see his smile from even closer to him…)

Those desires flowed endlessly through me, filling my heart with a strong yearning.

(Could this feeling be… love?)

That said, my life was still in danger and it wasn't the right time to be confessing to him.

(I’ve decided… once my illness is cured, I’ll tell Ellis about my feelings.)

However, while I was making that decision, I didn't notice that Ellis’ twilight coloured eyes had darkened and clouded over.

…

And so, the search for a cure to my illness began.

Although, in reality, it was Jude who did most of the actual searching and mixing potential medicine while Ellis took down the pursuers sent by my father and the assassins targeting Jude.

Meanwhile, I took care of our meals, clothes, and living space, supporting them in their everyday lives.

— But there was no progress, and time continued slipping away.

…

Jude: … We’re short on medicinal ingredients, so I’m headin’ out. Be back in half a day.

Although he’d never admit it, Jude looked worn out as he spoke before leaving the castle.

(Is it really alright to leave everything to Jude? Maybe there’s more I could be doing to help…)

Ellis: … Something on your mind, Kate?

Kate: Yeah. I’m just… frustrated that all I can do is watch from the sidelines…

Ellis: I see… is there anything I can do to help?

Ellis: I like you, so I want to give you strength.

Kate: eh.

(W-what kind of “like” does he mean…?)

I was a blushing mess but when I glanced at Ellis’ facial expression, he looked the same as always… he didn't look like he was confessing his love.

Kate: Just in case… Ellis, do you like Jude?

Ellis: Jude? Yeah, I do. I owe him, after all.

Kate: I-I see…

(... Thank goodness I didn't jump to conclusions. Ellis’ definition of “I like you” is platonic!)

It was a little disappointing, but I quickly regained my composure and returned to the topic.

Kate: Umm, anyway… I think I should do some research on my illness too.

Kate: Will you help me?

…

And so, we made our way to the study that Jude said was off-limits to us.

Kate: Found it!

Thanks to Jude’s meticulous personality, it didn't take long for us to find what we were looking for.

The research report about my illness was stored neatly in one of the desk drawers.

Kate: Um, let's see… “Briar Disease”?

According to the report, I contracted the disease by pricking myself on the thorns of a special kind of enchanted briar.

(Briar? Could it be…)

I was suddenly reminded of the briar I would talk to as a child.

(I remember being pricked by one of them and coming down with a high fever.)

(... Maybe that’s when I contracted this illness.)

“When the time comes, the thorn embedded in the body will rapidly grow, destroying the patient from their insides and ultimately resulting in death.”

“The only solution is to completely eliminate the existence of the briar the thorn came from, whether it is by burning or other means.”

As I read further, I found out that Jude had already identified the briar in question and it grew in the royal castle’s back garden.

However—.

“The briar is stubborn and unyielding, resisting all attempts to eliminate it.”

“It's a monstrous plant that regenerates even when burned or cut down. All efforts were in vain.”

Kate: So Jude concluded that it’s impossible to destroy the briar and started researching other ways to cure the illness.

Ellis: Yeah, he really tried every method he could come up with. He drowned it, froze it, burned it… you name it.

Ellis: The most painful one was when he chopped it up.

(Ellis was involved in trying to kill the briar too…)

(Since the briar is thorny, holding it while chopping it up must've hurt really badly.)

Ellis: … Hey, Kate.

Ellis: Do you truly want to cure your illness and continue living?

(I want to live, and… I want to keep talking to Ellis more and more.)

Kate: Yeah… of course.

Ellis: I see… so that’s your current wish.

Ellis: It’s… different from back then.

For some reason, Ellis wore a rather lonely smile.

Kate: Ellis…?

Ellis: … I understand your feelings. Well then, let’s go.

Ellis: If we go now, we can kill the briar.

#ikemen villains #ikemen series #cybird ikemen #cybird otome #ikevil translations #otome #ikevil story event #ellis twilight

64 notes · View notes

waywardcrow · 11 months ago

Text

Christmas blues.

Summary: Someone hurt his fairy and Bucky will do everything to fix it and give you the Christmas you deserve.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader.

WC: Almost 2K.

TW: Overprotective Bucky, sad reader because of an abusive ex, Christmas blues, talk about revenge and torture but just mentioned, crying, talk about cheating from reader’s ex and ex best friend, pinning dumbasses, ugly Christmas sweaters and Bucky wearing reindeer ears, kind of drunk writer (aka me), let me know if I missed something.

Disclaimer: English is not my first language, please tell me if I make grammar mistakes.

Part of the Take my hand (wreck my plans) series.

Pictures from pinterest, graphic and dividers by the amazing @ firefly-graphics so all credits to the creators.

Something had happened, Bucky knew it.

You were different after coming home from visiting your parents. They were going on a cruise ship for Christmas so you’ll be spending it at the compound with everybody for the first time.

He could thought it was the perspective of not spending the holidays with your blood family but you were so excited before you left to have Thanksgiving with them, it didn’t make sense.

Every time someone tried to engage you in decorating the tree or bake cookies for the kids, you smiled politely and declined, leaving everyone worried.

“What’s up with fairy?” Sam asked when he arrived with Sarah and his nephews; they agreed to spend the holidays there so nobody feel left out.

“We don’t know” Natasha replied watching you leave after they failed once again, this time you didn’t want to go ice skating.

“You don’t know?” Sam raised a brow, crossing his arms in front of his chest with a silly smile “I didn’t thought you were familiar with the concept.”

Bucky left them bickering to go find you and he did, your gaze was set in the sunset, not paying much attention to the cold in the air that surrounded you in the balcony.

“Hi sweetheart” you barely reacted, more used than him to Bucky being charming with you.

“What are you doing here? You could catch a cold” Bucky saw you take in the thin layered Henley he was wearing, practically nothing compared to your coat.

“I don’t get sick, honey” he reminded you, making your skin heat despite the winter, feeling like a dumbass. What a scientist you were “I appreciate the concern, though.”

You nodded.

“Are you alright?”

“I should be the one asking that” he said, bumping you gently with his shoulder, Bucky was too delicate with you still but he made every day an effort to be more open, especially with you. He watched your lips become a firm line and his heart started to beat faster in his ribcage. Something had happened, he was sure “I’m here if you want to talk fairy, we all want you to be ok.”

That broke you.

A tear escaped your control and Bucky’s heart sink down, he couldn’t help it when he hugged you making you hid your face in his chest, making you wrap your arms around his waist.

He let you cry; rubbing circles in your back and when you calmed down, Bucky took you to your apartment to make you hot chocolate.

When it was ready Bucky sat next to you in your colorful coach, watching you took a sip while making a mental list of all the awful ways he will torture who hurt you.

“I ran into my ex while being at home” you said without looking at him, making Bucky’s whole body tense. He only heard a few things about him from Tony and Pepper but none were good “he is engaged now, to my ex best friend.”

Oh Bucky would rip his arms away from his body.

“Did he… what did he said to you?” he got closer to his fairy; it should have been very bad to have you crying like that.

Your lower lip trembled so did the mug in your hands so Bucky put his right one on top of yours.

“He said I was invited to the wedding, that Lara and him were grateful I brought them together like they didn’t cheat on me for a year” your voice cracked and more years followed.

That bastard, hot anger cursed through Bucky’s body, he will make them suffer.

“And then Louis made fun of me for buying too much in the Christmas market, he said he was sorry I don’t have anyone to spend Christmas with, like an adult so I have to overcompensate being childish.”

The entire time your eyes were focused in your hands, so embarrassed to be this honest with him when it was your idiotic ex who should be very concerned about what was coming to him, he will recruit Nat and Yelena and Tony to make sure he will pay for every one your tears.

“He is right” you said wiping your tears with your sleeve “I’m childish and dumb and…”

“Hey, hey” Bucky stopped your self-destructive train taking both of your hands in his “none of that is true, fairy” he reassured you making you look at him “he is an asshole, an abuser” Bucky spited that word out, thinking about someone like you having to live with people like that jerk made him want to punch him until his metal arm got tired “he is wrong, you are not what he says.”

“Thanks Bucky but…”

“Ah ah, I’m not letting you be mean with yourself, you’ll do the same for me” it was true, you were so gentle with him and always help him to be gentle with himself too “you deserve the whole universe, honey” Bucky cupped your face in his hands and your breath caught in your throat.

His ocean blue eyes were so kind, so full of trust that it was impossible to not believe his words.

God, he wanted to kiss you so bad but it wasn’t the time so he left a kiss in your forehead “You are not alone, you are so loved by everyone that meets you and it kills me that you have to suffer all that shit, I’m so sorry fairy.”

You hugged him and stay there for a while, feeling the pain in your heart becoming easier.

The next day Bucky was knocking in your door before breakfast.

You were feeling bad for telling him all that, for letting him see that part of yourself that wasn’t bright, he had enough pain in his life and still he took yours and made it less heavy.

“Bucky? What are you doing here?” he looked so handsome even wearing the ugliest Christmas sweater you’ve ever seen “what are you wearing?” you whispered, not so sure if you were still sleeping, he was wearing reindeer ears too.

Did Tony and Bruce mess with the time lines again?

“We are going shopping, fairy” he handed you a matching sweater that looked your size “get ready, we leave in ten minutes to get waffles” and with that he disappeared in the hallway.

Confused you did what he said, maybe he needed help with his shopping and it was the least you could do after oversharing the previous night with him.

You met him in the elevators with your ugly sweater on and he smirked.

“You look good, fairy” bashful, you gave him a tiny smile and he felt it like a victory.

And the madness began.

True to his word, he took you for the best waffles you ever eat and then to the Christmas market in Brooklyn, still wearing his silly outfit, parting the crowded area like if he did that every random Sunday, oblivious to the chatter around you both and the not so discreet pictures some took of him. His whole attention was on you.

Bucky could recognize when you liked something, Louis words were still echoing in your mind but he made you feel so safe with him that remembering all your work with your therapist was easier and if you doubted before buying something, he would buy it for you.

You wouldn’t let Louis and Lara take anything more from you and he would help you with that.

“What do you think of this one? It seems perfect for Sam” he told you showing you a funny looking owl with a Santa hat, making you giggle.

“Put it some goggles on and then it will be perfect” you said without thinking, feeling all the cold leave your body when he throw his head back and laughed “oh no, forget I said that, poor Sam.”

“I’m never forgetting it doll, it’s exactly what I’m going to give him” he paid for the owl and gave the old lady in the vendor cart a smile that probably extended her life a decade.

Three hours later, lots of pretzels and hot chocolate you both were taking your car to go back home.

“Thank you for today” you said with a quiet voice when you parked outside the apartments “I know yesterday I was a lot, this made me feel better.”

“You’re never a lot, fairy, you are perfect” there was something else behind his words but before you could ask, Sam shout startled you.

“Hey, lovebirds, Sarah and Clint made lunch” he was wearing only shorts and a t-shirt which was insane but the basketball equipment explained a little, same as the presence of Thor, Cass, AJ and Yelena who looked very proud of herself.

“Let’s go” you said and follow the others, not noticing Bucky’s disappointment matched yours.

Christmas Eve was so much better than you expected, Natasha and Yelena didn’t leave you alone for a second, Wanda helped you wrap your presents, Tony, Morgan and Pepper would hug you randomly through the day and kiss your cheek, the rest of the team did things like that and you felt so loved.

Bucky made sure of it.

He didn’t tell you Louis and Lara were being taken care of, he probably never will, instead he choose to spend the afternoon making letters to Santa with the kids, having the perfect view of you from the living room while laughing at Morgan’s antics who tried to convince AJ and Cass that Happy was Santa. Nate was buying it by then and it was adorable, the chaos also reminded him of his sisters.

“Who wants dessert before dinner?” Yelena asked from the kitchen, the young widow didn’t miss the chance to steal sweets while you and the others cooked and apparently she wanted the kids to do the same.

There was a loud chorus of enthusiastic answers that made him wince even if the disapproval of the parents in the room made him smile. After a short but intense discussion, Sam and you convinced the others to let it happen, it was Christmas after all.

“Just one cookie, ok? We have to wait for dinner” Sam said holding the tray for them and the little munchkins yell, sugar high already “they are not for you, terminator.”

Sam tried to take them from him but you took the tray from your friend.

“Don’t listen to him, take as many as you want” you said, making a silly face at Sam who responded with a similar one.

“Thanks, fairy” Bucky took one of your cookies and barely noticed Sam going towards the Christmas tree “they smell so good.”

If that didn’t make your skin feel on fire, Morgan’s words did.

“Auntie fairy, you are under the mistletoe with Mr. Barnes” a giggle escaped the little girl and then the others kids who laughed at your reaction. The adults in the kitchen stayed in silence, despite Natasha’s “kiss her, dumbass” comment and Bucky… Bucky was looking at you like you were the only one he could see.

Biting your lip, you doubted for a heartbeat before standing in your tiptoes and giving him a kiss, short and sweet, just like you.

And then, Tony let out a wolf whistle, Yelena an exasperated sigh and you could hear Sam in the back asking who dressed an owl like him and put it in top of the tree but your focus was mostly in the handsome man in front of you who took you by the waist and kissed you again.

Merry Christmas lovelies! Hope you like this one, please tell me what you think, if you want to see more about Bucky and fairy, etc.

Love, Lily.

#bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x f!reader

288 notes · View notes

maidragoste · 1 year ago

Text

3 people you thought you might marry + one of the people you married.

Hi, this is part of the universe of "The Queen and her husbands" but it can be read independently without having read the series.

Thanks for all the support, it always makes me happy to answer your questions and comments. REBLOGS and likes are always appreciated 🥰🥰💕💕💕

Disclaimer: English is not my first language so I apologize for any mistakes.

I. Jacaerys Velaryon

No one could blame you for thinking you would marry your brother after all it was your family's customs. Aegon the Conqueror married his two sisters, Visenya and Rhaenys; Jaehaerys also married his sister Alysanne; and your great-grandparents Baelon and Alyssa Targaryen were also siblings. So it was only natural that you thought that you and Jace would follow in his footsteps.

Jacaerys would be king and you would be his queen. Your grandfather, King Viserys, told them once when he was sitting on the iron throne with both of you on his lap. From there you and your brother began to imagine what your future together would be like.

Sometimes in the early morning, you would crawl into Jace's bed and the two of you would discuss the things you would do once you were both king and queen. They were silly things like forbidding bedtime or forbidding vegetables in your meal after all you two were just kids. Even so, they both dreamed of being as loved as King Jaehaerys and Queen Alysanne once were. Then they both began to take their role seriously and tried harder in their lessons, Jacaerys tried to speak her Valyrian more fluently and you tried to pay more attention to numbers so that in the future you could manage the kingdom's currency well.

You were sure you would be happy with Jace. He already made you happy, listening to you, bringing you flowers from the gardens when you were sad, and being your accomplice when the two of you went to steal cakes from the kitchens. You know him better than anyone and he knows you. You two are half of each other. You love him and he loves you.

Every time Jace smiled at you you felt warm. Every time he takes your hand you feel safe and when they hug you, you are sure you can hear both of their hearts racing as if they were just one.

None of that matters because a year after you and Jace began to dream of a future together, your mother forbade you from going to Jacaerys' chambers alone at night again because she was planning an engagement between him and Helaena.

You got angry with your mother but especially with your brother because you thought he would fight for you but he didn't do anything. You locked yourself in your chambers for days without wanting to see either of them. You ended up getting out thanks to Aegon, who took you flying with Sunfyre.

II. Clement Celtigar

You weren't stupid. You knew that your mother was thinking about a possible match between you and Bartimos Celtigar's son. Lately, every time you went to Dragonstone to visit your siblings the Celtigar family was also there and your mother pushed you to spend time with Clement.

You didn't like him. Maybe if your mother didn't force you so much to be with him you'd probably like him more. But you only came to Dragonstone to see your brothers and spending time with Clement took away valuable time with your family. Jace was also upset by this, you think this is the first time you've heard him turn against your mother.

The truth is you were bored spending time with Clement. He didn't make you laugh like Aegon did and his conversations weren't as interesting as the ones you had with Aemond.

Clement seemed more interested in your dragon than you. You didn't blame him, after all, Nix was beautiful and it was normal for people to be curious about dragons since they were such magnificent creatures but you couldn't help but feel irritated because it seemed like the only attractive thing about you was your dragon. He looked at you with boredom every time you talked about something other than Nix, which made you feel insecure because you were starting to think that maybe the problem was you, that in reality, you were the boring one, not him. You even started to think that maybe you were boring Aemond too but he was too kind to pretend that he was interested in listening to you talk about the books you read and your visits to orphanages.

When you returned to King's Landing, Aemond noticed that you were quieter and the few times you spoke it was in short sentences and without elaborating so much. So he knew something had happened on your visit to Dragonstone. He couldn't stand seeing you withdrawn anymore, nothing to do with your bubbly and radiant energy, so he decided to ask you what happened in the hope of being able to help you solve whatever was bothering you so you would be your usual self again.

“Will you tell me once and for all what happened in Dragonstone?” the prince asked, pulling you from your reading. The two were in the gardens reading. Normally the two of you would take turns reading aloud but now you found yourself reading different books because you told Aemond that you were sure your book would bore him.

If it were someone else you probably would have lied and claimed that everything was fine. But it was Aemond and he knew you better than anyone. For some reason, he always seemed to be the first to notice when you were upset or sad.

“Do you think I'm boring?” You closed your book and left it on your lap.

"Of course not," the prince responded instantly. "Who told you that?" he asked, annoyed, already thinking of ordering whoever had bothered you to join him in his training so he could attack him without anyone scolding him.

“Clement Celtigar. He didn't tell me but I think he thinks I'm boring” you admitted embarrassedly, nervously grabbing the necklace that Aemond had given you on your last name day. Now you were afraid that your uncle would think you were stupid for caring so much about a boy's opinion.

"Since when do you care about Clement Celtigar's opinion?" He asked with a frown. Weeks ago you were complaining about having to spend time with the heir of Paw Island and now you were suddenly worried about him.

"I want him to like me. I could marry him one day" you said regretfully. Every time you tried to imagine a future with Clement you always found yourself unhappy. You wouldn't say Clement was a bad man but right now you didn't think you could ever love him. A part of you thought that it didn't matter who you married because you would still be unhappy having to leave King's Landing. You knew it was your duty but you always felt sad thinking that you would no longer be able to see Aemond or Aegon every day. Although you barely saw Aegon lately he seemed to prefer spending more time in Flea Bottom.

Your words seemed to irritate Aemond even more because he seemed angry now.

"You like him?"

"No" you responded instantly and couldn't help but grimace.

"Your mother is a fool," he said, earning a nudge from you.

"Aemond!"

After your father's death, the relationship between you and your mother was not the same, you were no longer as close as before, and sometimes you couldn't help but hate her, but you still couldn't allow anyone to speak ill of her.

"You are a Targaryen princess, you can't marry just anyone, a Celtigar is beneath you. You should marry someone of your level. Plus we have to keep the Valyrian blood pure" he said passionately.

"So should I marry you?" You couldn't help but laugh as you watched Aemond's cheeks turn red at your question. Normally the prince would be angry that someone was laughing at him but after not having heard your laugh for days He was happy. He looked at you with a small smile, trying to ignore the rapid pace of his heart.

"Someday, if you want" Aemond responded, trying to remain calm but his heart did not return to its normal rhythm and he felt suddenly hot, especially on his face.

You didn't say anything else, you just walked up to the prince and kissed his cheek making him blush even more.

Anyway, you didn't have to worry much about Clement because weeks later any possible engagement between you was forgotten after Jacaerys had beaten him.

III. Kermit Tully

You were tired after dancing with Kermit. You lost count of the number of songs you danced together. Your feet hurt but if he asked you again to be his dance partner you wouldn't hesitate to say yes. You were happy. You enjoyed his company, you liked listening to him talk about Riverrun and the pranks he and his brother sometimes got into. Besides, Kermit was brave, or at least brave enough to be the only one who dared to ask you for your favor despite the angry looks of your uncles and Jace. He was handsome too. Sometimes you felt like running your hand through his red hair and bringing your face closer to his to see what color his eyes were, but that wouldn't be seen well.

You couldn't help but let your eyes wander around the room until you found Kermit, he was talking to his family, and as if he had felt your gaze, his clear eyes soon met yours. He smiled at you and you smiled at him, trying to ignore the heat you felt on your face. You couldn't help but wonder what your children would be like if you two ever had children if they would have Kermit's smile or yours, have your traits, or gain the Tully genes. You loved your family but you were already bored seeing so many platinum hair, so it wouldn't bother you if your children came out with red hair, they would be unique. Anyway, regardless of their hair color, you were sure they would have cute children.

"Oh gods, he's just a boy. There's nothing special about him," Aegon said, sitting next to you, making you look at him.

“He only seems like a boy to you because you're older than him,” you responded, rolling your eyes.

"He is a boy. I'm sure he doesn't even know how to satisfy a woman. I can satisfy you,” he said, taking you by the chin. You suddenly felt warm at the intensity of his gaze. If he came a little closer, his lips would touch yours. You were sure you weren't the only one to notice that so you pushed his arm away.

“Oh, uncle, you shouldn't drink so much. Your jokes aren't as funny as you think!" you exclaimed louder than normal, hoping that the people closest to you would think it was one of Aegon's drunken nonsense instead of thinking there was something between him and you. The last thing you needed was for the court to start gossiping that you were Aegon's mistress. Aemond would be furious with you as would your brothers and your mother. Besides, you might lose the chance to get engaged to Kermit.

The prince frowned at you before taking a long drink from his cup.

“Why do you want a trout when you can have a dragon?” he asked, not bothering to hide his displeasure. He didn't surprise you. Your family's custom was to marry each other, for that reason, your uncles thought that any man who was not a Targaryen was not worthy of you.

Aegon was wrong. You couldn't have a dragon. Your mother needed you to make alliances that's why she wouldn't let you marry Jace and much less would she let you marry Aemond or Daeron. But maybe if you asked she could let you marry Kermit. You'd rather choose your own fiancé before she chooses one for you.

“Maybe I'm tired of so many dragons.”

Of course, you were lying. Actually one of the reasons you wanted to get married was to get away from King's Landing. Riverrun sounded wonderful and you hoped that there you could forget about your feelings for Aemond. Lately, you had spent your nights thinking about him, dreaming about a wedding that would never happen and when you were together you couldn't concentrate on what he was telling you because you got distracted thinking about what it would be like to kiss him. Your heart seemed to jump out of your chest every time he smiled at you or complimented you. Gods, you felt so stupid, you needed to forget him or you'd end up heartbroken because nothing would happen between the two of you. The family wouldn't approve.

You hoped that if you didn't see Aemond every day you would realize your feelings for him would be forgotten. Besides, you believed that Kermit Tully would be able to win you over as well. You could see yourself happy next to him.

What you never imagined was that after the celebration was over, Aemond, jealous of your approach to Kermit, would appear in your room and kiss you. The most sensible thing would have been to kick him out and continue with your plan to marry Kermit Tully, but how could you do that when you now knew that he also felt the same way as you? How could you move on now that you know what his lips taste like? How could you do it when you finally had what your heart longed for? You knew that now that you had tasted what it was like to have him, there was no turning back. You couldn't marry anyone else.

I. Aemond Targaryen

You should be furious with Aemond after how he treated your brothers at dinner. You should be kicking his ass after he calls your brothers bastards. Because of him, your family had returned to Dragonstone, and you were barely able to say goodbye to Jace.

You should want to keep Aemond away after what he did tonight. How could you be with someone who treated your brothers like that? What did that say about you? But you couldn't help it. The heart wants what it wants. For that reason, you find yourself in the middle of the night on the outskirts of the Red Keep with only the company of a septon and you Aemond. Getting married secretly.

If someone had told you that same morning that you would end up marrying Aemond tonight you would have laughed. Sure, you've been in a relationship for a while, and from time to time you talked about what your wedding would be like but you honestly didn't think you two were brave enough to get married and ignore your families' wishes. But today you realized that you were wrong. Aemond was angry because your mother in the middle of dinner asked your grandfather for her blessing to arrange a marriage between you and Cregan Stark. An hour after dinner ended, he entered your chambers and told you that you would marry him, that he was not going to let you go to the North, that he was not going to allow your mother to separate you, that your place was at his side, that you both belonged to each other and most importantly that he loves you.

You never imagined your wedding would be like this. You always thought your family would be by your side. When you were a little girl you imagined your father giving you away but after he died you thought he would be your grandfather. But now you were alone.

You also imagined that you would make your maiden cape with the help of your mother, your grandmother, and your cousins. But not. You were getting married without a cape because there was no time to make one. At least Aemond had managed to take the cloak that Aegon had worn at his wedding to Helaena so when he arrived in time he could put the cloak on you.

Your hand didn't stop shaking as the septon tied the ribbon over both of your hands. You honestly didn't know if your trembling was due to the excitement of finally being able to be Aemond's wife or because of the nerves you had knowing the repercussions that your marriage would have. You just hoped your brothers didn't hate you. Your vision became blurry for a moment due to the tears that were forming in your eyes. Jace couldn't hate you, he would understand, you couldn't let your son be a bastard.

You took a deep breath and focused on ignoring your nerves and sudden sadness. This is your wedding and it is a happy occasion. This is what you wanted. Now no one can separate you from Aemond. You smiled. You would stay at home with him, you wouldn't go North.

When your husband took you by the shoulder and kissed you, you forgot your fears. You focused on the addictive taste of his lips and how he seemed hungry for you like he couldn't get enough of you. You kissed him with the same passion. Now only you two mattered. Tomorrow Aemond and you would face anything together.

taglist: @watercolorskyy @chaotic-fangirl-blog @venus-flytrap3 @sweethoneyblossom1 @fudge13 @alisoncdariel @crystal-faith @cicaspair418 @tita004 @ichanelvxgue

@snowprincesa1 @snh96 @rosey1981 @papichulo120627 @apollonshootafar @jasminecosmic99 @fluffly @bxdbxtxh15 @impartinghades @hannaeditzs

@multi-fandoms-stuff @zverea @solacestyles @lilithskywalker @justsumtuffstuff @crispmarshmallow @afro-hispwriter @libdarkheart @chevelledahuman @helloitsshitzulover

@ladybug0095 @ietss @serendippindots @ultraviollett @akinatrix @papery-maniac @merovingianprincess @hnybitches @m1ndbrand @giulia2372

@noisyinfluencerstrawberry @bajadotcom @woodandwaxwings @mendes-bae @sustisama @imjustboredso @remuslupinwifee @sarcasticking9 @melllinaa @letsloveimagines

If you want to be part of my taglist

hotd masterlist

417 notes · View notes

radioisntdead · 8 months ago

Note

Good morning, as you have requests open can I get some Velvette x g/n! reader angst (perhaps ending with comfort) romance?

One night they overhear her talking negatively about them (not an overlord, lack of confidence, whatever) so they leave behind a note saying they were right to feel like she didn't actually love them and they've left, not saying where.

Good evening my dear! We are ending the cannibal streak with Velvette! WOO, It's late and I'm woozy, this became a song fic I'm sorry.

Velvette x reader,

Warnings!

Light angst, Valentino,

The song used: Moral of the story

You and Velvette met at a New Years party back in the 2000's, the air was heavy, you had a red solo cup with heavens knew what was in it, maybe Vodka and something? You didn't know, people were kissing, yelling, and whatever else.

So I never really knew you

When Velvette approached you, you felt like the luckiest person in the world, like nothing else in the room exist, she was only person there in your eyes,

When she talked about how boring the party was you found yourself agreeing with every word she said, her voice soothing to you.

God, I really tried to, Blindsided, addicted

The two of you died in a car accident, music was blasting from the radio, you were looking outside the window, and Velvette was texting and driving,

It was quick, she ran a red light and BAM, a truck hit the two of you causing the car to roll, glass shattered and the one thing you remember is reaching out to Velvette before everything went dark.

Felt we could really do this

You once told Velvette that you'd follow her to hell and back,

Guess that was true because guess where you ended up?

But really I was foolish

Things didn't change much as she rose to the top, becoming an overlord, teaming up with some guys named Vox and Valentino, Vox was decent enough but Valentino gave you the chills, he never did anything but still.

Velvette made sure to shield you from his business, you weren't allowed on his floor.

Hindsight, it's obvious

Velvette was never scared to demand things, to order things around, to get her hands somewhat dirty if needed, if she wanted it she got it

You weren't like that, you didn't like having blood on your hands, While Velvette treated service staff like they were an inconvenience you treated them with respect, like they were people.

Velvette didn't like that part of you, she liked it when it was towards her or maybe the other Vee's but no one else.

Talking with the cannibal She said, "Where'd you find this girl?"

You weren't having a good day, you and Velvette got into a argument over her spending too much time on her phone, you said that she loved that stupid thing more then you, she didn't deny it, just said that you were acting fucking crazy and left.

I said, "Young people fall in love, with the wrong people sometimes"

You had several things to do, some employees couldn't do their job properly and you didn't want to lash out of them, all you wanted to do was just relax with your fiancee, you got some flowers and an Emoji plush to give her as an apology.

Some mistakes get made

As you stood outside the door that lead to the Vee's living room you could hear muffled talking, a voice you could recognize was Velvette's.

That's alright, that's okay

You cracked the door open and peaked in, She was talking to Valentino.

You can think that you're in love

"Then They say that I love my phone then them! Like maybe if you weren't such a fuckin' loser that can't even order a coffee without almost crying I'd pay more attention to you!"

When you're really just in pain

You clutched the flowers, crushing the stems as you took a step back.

Some mistakes get made

"They aren't an overlord, the only they have any of this is because of me!" She said throwing herself onto the couch and went back to her phone, that damned phone.

That's alright, that's okay

Quietly and quickly you made your way to the room you shared with Velvette, you did your best not to slam the door indicating that you were back, you threw the flowers and plush into a trashcan before taking out a few suitcases.

No tears were shed, just anger, betrayal and disappointment flooded you.

In the end, it's better for me

You packed the clothes that were your favorites, you couldn't take everything since for one, Velvette gave you the majority, and two, she gave you a bunch of clothes.

Once You had everything packed you wrote a note giving a brief explanation, that you had heard what she said, and that since you were SUCH a loser, she should date a overlord instead.

That's the moral of the story, babe

You left the Vee's tower, without a single soul noticing, now standing on a random street corner you took a deep breath, you had enough money, from your OWN means, to get a hotel to stay at for maybe a week? Just until you could get an apartment or something.

It's funny how a memory

Velvette didn't notice you were gone until late the next day, she thought you were being petty avoiding her because of a little fight and she had decided to let you take the bedroom, sleeping in her office instead.

She supposed she should apologize because she loved you and she was tired of this.

Turns into a bad dream

She stepped into your shared room, not noticing anything missing, until a colorful object caught her eye from the trashcan, leaning down it was an emoji plush, cringey but it was soft, it was covering a bouquet of flowers, her favorites infact.

When running wild turns volatile

Her face twisted into confusion as she looked around, spotting the note you left on the bed.

She hadn't meant for you to hear her.

Remember how we painted our room, Just like the other Vee's did?

You were gone. She fucked up.

So romantic, but we fought the whole time

It was just a small fight right? The two of you would kiss and make up like usual, maybe watch a movie after, but you had left, you left her!

Should have seen the signs

She couldn't find you, anywhere.

Vox only got footage of you leaving the tower and nothing else, he spied on the ENTIRE ring and he couldn't find YOU?

Talking with the cannibal, She said, "Where'd you find this girl?"

You had stumbled upon the Hazbin hotel, you were welcomed by Charlie with open arms, she was ecstatic, you were the first sinner to join them after the extermination.

Said, "Some people fall in love with the wrong people sometimes"

Being away from Velvette was so...

Some mistakes get made

Freeing, it was as if you were spreading your wings for the first time in years, which you were! You'd been with Velvette for over a decade, not counting your life beforehand.

That's alright, that's okay

You loved Velvette, you truly did, but she didn't love you like you did her, she didn't act like it,

She thought you were on the weaker side.

You can think that you're in love

You had no interest in rising up the ranks, working instead on becoming a better person, with every exercise with the hotel residents you got more and more confident, changing your appearance along the way.

When you're really just in pain

After you more sinners came to the hotel, a few ready for redemption.

Some mistakes get made

You met someone, she had the most beautiful pink eyes that reminded you of pink lemonade, she was different then Velvette, you couldn't help but compare the two, Velvette was so... Cruel and she was so Soft, kind, she just killed a guy but that wasn't a deal breaker in your book.

That's alright, that's okay

It took time but the two of you grew close, you'd have lunch together, eventually that moved to sleepovers, movie nights, sweet words exchanged between the two of you.

You were apprehensive about entering a new relationship after Velvette, but it just felt right.

In the end it's better for me

Charlie was excited when you went to her for date ideas to take your newest sweetheart, she was so proud of you, you had come so far!

That's the moral of the story, babe

They say it's better to have loved and lost

Velvette searched for you, you due to plot armour and your changed appearance had managed to completely avoid Vox's cameras or Velvette's hunting you down, she regretted saying what she did, she wouldn't have said it if she knew you were listening!

Than never to have loved at all

You had decided to step out of the hotel with your dearest sweetheart, deciding to go out for a simple date, watch a movie and maybe shop around and grab a bite to eat

That could be a load of shit

Velvette had decided to go check out her competition's stores, going shopping at the same stores you did.

But I just need to tell you all

You didn't see her, and she almost didn't recognize you but she did.

Some mistakes get made

Her blood ran cold, or colder as she watched you dote on the lady next to you, arm wrapped around hers, holding her bags for her.

You had done that for her once upon a time.

That's alright, that's okay

She wanted to say something, like where have you been, I'm sorry, who the fuck is this, come home! Or something but she couldn't, she could only watch as you laughed at something she said, you used to laugh like that with her,

You SHOULD be laughing like that with her.

You can think that you're in love

Velvette's hand clenched into a fist, her fingers digging into her palm making indents.

When you're really just engaged

You should be with her, not whoever that wench was! The engagement ring she had accepted from you ages ago was still on her finger.

Where was yours?

Some mistakes get made

She watched as you walked away with her.

That's alright, that's okay

She finally moved, following in pursuit.

In the end it's better for me

You and your sweetheart were having a wonderful time, shopping around and the two of you were finally getting something to eat, you went to the cutest little café, and you walked back to the hotel holding hands.

That's the moral of this story

Some mistakes get made

Velvette knew where you were now.

That's alright, that's okay

You were so happy, Velvette hasn't crossed your mind in ages.

You can think that you're in love

She didn't know how to get you, she didn't want you to hate her.

When you're really just in pain

You squealed as you landed on your bed kicking your legs back and forth like a lovesick fool.

Some mistakes get made

You had to come back to her willingly, once you were done with this little fling, she would leave you heartbroken and Velvette would welcome you back with open arms, hugs and kisses.

That's alright, that's okay

You sighed happily, a dumb love filled grin on your face.

In the end it's better for me

You had come SO far from how you were before, you were proud of yourself, you had a healthy relationship with your lovely girlfriend, you had amazing friends, and you were on the road to redemption with them! You couldn't ask for more.

That's the moral of the story, babe

You will never go back to Velvette, you loved her once yes, you truly did, but that was in the past, and you deserved better, and you got better.

Good evening folks! Thank you for tuning in! It's late for me and I wrote this in one sitting, I'm gonna go knock out now, have a wonderful night folks!

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #Velvette x reader #hazbin velvette #hazbin velvette x reader #hazbin hotel velvette

199 notes · View notes

dirtylittlefairytales · 3 months ago

Text

Don't play with fire | - Part 2 - |

Autors Note: I recommend to read Part 1 first. This is going to be a rollercoaster, but I hope you like it. I liked writing it and I'm really happy I started writing again. Now I try writing smut too. If you like the song 'Unholy from Sam Smith' listening to it later on, made the scene better. At least I listened to it while I wrote the scene.

Also as before, english is not my first language, I hope I corrected most mistakes.

Summary: After having a panic attack and realizing that Cooper could be the Butcher., you tried living your life normally again, until you got a text from an unknown number. Should you go to the police? Half a year later everything is normal again, at least you think it is.

-> Writing in 'italic' is supposed to be the your thoughts

Warnings: Dark!Fic, Describing of a Panic attack, Age Gap! (Legal), Swearing! Praise! Alcohol consumption!, drugs!, bit of Smut, Angst!, Arguing

Rating: R

Word count: 7,4k

Tagging: @a-movie-that-youve-never-seen, @amethystblackkchaos, @hereforthehitsbaby, @waywardtigersandwich

That was your first panic attack you had in your life. You spend that day at the hospital, your mom picking you up in the evening. She didn’t pry for information, although she was very worried. When you got back to her house and sat in the living room over a hot tea, you told her everything– Though more like everything she could know.

You told her about the concert, how you weren’t feeling well because of the crowd of people. So you went home early, then your bike got stolen and your boss fired you after some nasty words. You said you didn’t know how you ended up at the hospital, you were just aimlessly walking and then woke up in the hospital. Remembering a lot of concerned voices around you but nothing more.

Seeing that you were near tears again your mom started to hug you for several minutes. You let it all out. All those bottle up emotions of the day. You just didn’t know what to do with all these emotions. It was too much, like you weren’t in control anymore.

“You know sweety, you should move closer again. Ah no disagreeing! Think about it. You know my grandparents also had their apartment. Please consider it, I worry about you.” she said, squeezing your shoulders. “You could save so much money!”

“Okay mom. I promise I’ll think about it, but not today. Let me find a new job first.” you tried avoiding the situation. She nodded

“Well, come one you can sleep in your old room today. Tomorrow I'll drive you to the mechanic so you can get your car back.”

“Thanks mom.”, she kissed the top of your head and pushed you towards the stairs. Shaking your head, you went up towards your old room. You could barely say no to anything, when it came to your mom. However, moving back was the one thing you didn’t want. It was stupid. You wanted to live independent and not in your moms apartment, where she probably wouldn’t even allow you to pay rent.

Stepping inside your room, everything looked as you last remembered it. Your mom tried to make it look like your old room. The big double bed near the window, with the one teddy bear on it. A small wooden closet near the wall. You closed the curtains on the window and went to bed.

On the bathroom mirror you could see a bruise starting to form on your shoulder, where Cooper had gripped it. Clearly you couldn’t wear something without sleeves the next few weeks.

Before going to sleep you checked your phone. You nearly forgot about it. There was nothing. No new contact, no number saved anywhere, everything was the same. You remember it clearly, he told you he had saved his number, but nothing. You checked your phone completely. Looked through everything, photos, deleted messages, deleted contacts. Still nothing.

‘Had he just been toying with you? Playing into your anxiety?’ After checking your phone for a second time you gave up. Maybe you imagined it, maybe you should just call it a day. As soon as you put your phone down and your head hit your pillow you were out. The events of that day were finally catching up with you.

Waking up the next day, you still felt exhausted but overall better. True to her word, your mom drove you to the mechanic, and reminded you to visit her once a week like you promised her on her last birthday. No more work excuses.

You promised, she was getting older and you did want to spend more time with her. She turned 59 this year. You loved her, she always did her best. Recently your grandfather passed away, leaving everything to your mom. Your grandparents had an estranged relationship with your mom, but seeing as she was their only child… she inherited it all. Now your mom could live without worries. She had a house and had a spare apartment. Seeing as they did have a bit of money.

Over the next week you wrote more job applications and went to a couple of interviews. Until you finally found yourself a new job. The company and boss seemed nice and you even got to work from home 10 days a month. Big plus and the pay was decent. You stayed in your apartment most of the time after the concert, fearing you might run into Cooper somewhere. You were quite paranoid. Fearing what he would do to you. Were you going to be next, if he was the Butcher?

With the new job, came new energy and you started to live again. Step by step you were going outside, to the office, meeting your friends or going out for drinks. Still sometimes, you looked around you. Feeling like someone was staring holes in your back.

The second panic attack came when on a day you were working from home. A few weeks had passed and overall it started like a totally normal day, just a few calls. Not much work to do that day and around lunch time you still wore your pajamas. When you went into the kitchen to cook, you suddenly got a text message from an unknown number. First you thought it was someone from work. Though, the number didn’t seem familiar, so maybe it was a customer? However, none had your private number. You opened the message and instantly knew who sent that text.

–You should watch the news. Unfortunately I must tell you that Spencer didn't seem to be very grateful. Sorry to disappoint you sweetheart. –

You dropped your phone, heart pounding in your chest. ‘Sweetheart– Was that Cooper? So he did have your number… Why should you watch the news?’ Slowly you crept down, picking up your phone from the floor and almost dropping it again. Your hands trembled so much.

After releasing a shuddering breath, you put your phone in your pocket and stepped towards your living room. One step at time, fearing you might fall if you walked too fast. Holding on to your sofa for dear life, you reached for the remote.

Turning on the TV, unsure of what you would find, you switched programs until you found the news channel. Your hands still trembling, you took deep breaths trying to calm yourself.

‘Maybe you should sit down?’ – Letting yourself fall onto the sofa you turned up the volume. You saw a lot of police in the background then view switched to the reporter, who started speaking

“Yesterday in the early hours, two hikers found something horrible on their daily hiking trail. We waited for further information from the police and we can now announce that the Butcher has found yet another victim. This marks the 13th victim of the Butcher.”

Your knuckles around the remote turned white from anticipation, your fingernails digging in your own palm. ‘Maybe you should stop with the acrylic nails’ You held your breath. They showed a photo of a young man on the screen. It wasn’t someone you knew.

“The victim seems to be a young man named Spencer–” Spencer.. That was the name he told you that day. You didn’t even listen to the rest of the news. Completely blending everything out, thoughts racing in your head. A sob escaped you, your whole body shook uncontrollably. Gasping for air, crying, you had your second panic attack. It felt even stronger then the first one, but maybe it was only because you were more aware now.

A part of you felt like you killed Spencer. You had thought he was just playing with your fear. It was your fault. ‘What have you done… you were right all along. Your sixth sense didn’t leave you. Why haven't you gone to the police? Were you an accomplice now? Why haven’t you told somebody? You could have saved him…’ The answer was simple. You hadn’t been 100% sure. Hell until now you thought you imagined most of his weird behavior, were overthinking it, writing it off as anxiety.

Helplessly you wandered around towards your kitchen in the search for a bag. When you finally found one, you sank down against your cupboard. Taking deep breaths with the plastic bag to calm your breathing. After calming down and just sitting silently in your kitchen for 20 minutes, you got up and shut down the TV.

‘You couldn’t go to the police, could you? What if they held you responsible for it because you didn’t say anything until now. You didn’t even know his last name or where he lived.’

A dry and humorless laugh escaped you. Putting your face in your hand, trying to come to terms with reality. Finally you pushed your hair back and grabbed your phone.

Pondering if you should write back? Try to get information from him and go to the police? Could you get burned even more? Thinking for another minute you decided against it. Panic and anxiety controlled your actions. Your course of action was going in the complete opposite direction. Simply deleting the message. Deleting the evidence, deleting a small part of your guilt– ‘out of sight out of mind’

You didn’t continue work that day, called in sick, went to bed and just stared aimlessly at the ceiling. Thinking about everything. About the concert, about every small detail you remembered. All the strange things you thought he did, but in the end you thought it was just your imagination.

This was so fucked up, why were you still alive and not locked up in some basement? Why were you still alive? He knew that you knew. By sending you that text, it almost seemed like he wanted you to know. It hardly made any sense to you. After hours and hours of thinking and getting a headache from it, you fell asleep rather exhausted.

Not even a day after you even changed your number, telling your friends and mom another lie. The excuse, you got too many spam calls on it, seemed to be good enough. You were that anxious that you were one step away from moving back into your mom's house. However you didn't want to exaggerate.

Everything you did, to feel secure didn’t help. The anxiety remained. Whenever you went outside you felt like a scared mouse, always looking around, getting in your car and inside the office building as quickly as possible. At first you looked for a black van, then you remembered that stupid little you had the great idea to reveal to him what the profiler said. Of course he was not driving that van anymore. Perhaps now he drove around in a girly pink car.

‘How could you have been so stupid?’, you wanted to bang your head against the table. You even judged Lady Raven for her naivety and here you were telling the Butcher what car to not drive. What to look out for. You helped him even further, by not going to the police. He must have been laughing at you in his head. What a fucking joke. He also must have realized what effect he had on you, using that for his advantage. That for one you found him attractive, on the other hand you were intimidated by him. You were glad you were still alive, but it also made you nervous.

A month later and nothing new from the Butcher and no strange occurrences you finally started to relax again. Cooper and all that happened was slowly being pushed to the back of your head.

Furthermore, you moved out of your apartment. You felt spooked and unsafe in it. Living near your mom again gave you a small aspect of security back. Fortunately your workplace had a second office 20 min from your mom's apartment. You rented some transporter and with the help of your friends you moved your stuff into your new apartment within a day. Moving out helped your anxiety a lot.

Another month later, you started to go out with your friends again, didn’t look around every time you left your apartment and became more yourself. Feeling confident. You were slowly going after your hobbies again. Running outside, Swimming, visiting your favorite coffee shop or reading in the park on a good day. All without turning around every few seconds.

Before you knew it about half a year had passed and it all was a mere memory. You hadn’t had another panic attack in months. Your job was great, you met your friends a lot, also visited your mom every week and you could even listen to music with noise canceling headphones again. It felt normal. Back to how it was before. There was no news from the Butcher. No new Butcher victims, just some mom in a horrible car crash, but aside from that there was just the usual news.

It was around January, a Saturday, your birthday to be exact, where it began to get strange again. Even though it started out as every other birthday since you were 21. First brunch with your mum, having some good quality time in your favorite restaurant. After that, you went home again and around the evening your friends should arrive to go out. You should be around 10 people later. Normally you would just celebrate at home, but your best friend Simon wanted to party. Who were you to deny his wishes?

You had been Besties for ages, growing up with the same situation of a cheating parent, pushed you even closer together. It was only after high school where you went in different directions. Simon wanted to study, whereas you started working. There he met his better half Sebastian, they’ve been together ever since and when the three of you did something together they treated you like their child. Which you found hilarious. You loved them.

So a couple of friends were coming over and around midnight you would go dancing. When you arrived back at your apartment you noticed something strange. There was a small gift in front of your door. You looked around if you saw any of your neighbors before picking it up and unlocking your door.

It didn’t seem to have a name anywhere. ’Strange. Maybe it was from that elderly woman on the first floor?’, you wondered. You put it on your kitchen counter, saving it for later. Seeing as you had only a couple of hours left to clean and dress up. Also you needed your makeup done before simon came, or he would go way overboard with his ideas. You already agreed to let him do your hair and change your outfit, if it was “too boring”.

That was another reason he wanted you to go out. Maybe you would finally find prince charming and you could go on cute double dates. In his opinion, your ‘no dating’ phase had been going on too long. Looking at yourself in the mirror you felt good. You decided to go with some short black pants, and a glittery black top with an open back.

By the time the others arrived you totally forgot about the present still laying wrapped on the kitchen counter. Friend after friend arrived, all of them overly punctual. Except for two individuals, as always. You didn’t mind, it was only Lucas, a friend of Sebastian, with his girlfriend Mary. You didn’t particularly like her, Mary needed to be in the spotlight, sometimes you felt like she tried to replace you in your friend group. None of the others saw this most of the time though. She was ‘little miss perfect’. Well, except for Simon and Lizzy, they did see her other side sometimes.

Putting on some music after everybody sat down in the living room, you went back to the kitchen to help Simon with the last drinks. As Simon was putting away the cake he brought on the kitchen counter he saw the small present laying around. “Who is this from?”

You walked towards him to see what he ment. “Oh, I actually don’t know. I think one of my neighbors left it for me.” shrugging you picked it up.

“Do you know what's inside?”, You shook your head, now you’ve done it. Simon loved a good mystery, something to solve, something thrilling.

“Well then, open it! I’ll get the rest of the drinks.”, he ushered you towards the living room where the others sat around your coffee table. Climbing over the back rest of your couch, you made yourself comfortable in the corner. Simon brought your drinks while you started to open the present. “What is it?”

“It’s…” you frowned. Pulling out a simple small teddy bear, with something silver on top. It was made out of plastic, nothing overly special. It was a Keychain.

“I think that’s something I could put on my keychain? Wait there's more…” There was something shiny at the bottom of the present.

“A bracelet– Oh, it’s really pretty.” You held it towards the light, it sparkled brightly. It was a simple silver bracelet, with a little charm in the center. A cute colorful flower.

“Aww how cute. But it seems like it was more for a child? Are you sure your neighbors know your age?” Lizzy laughed and poked you. She was what you would consider your girl bestfriend.

“Or maybe they know that you still have stuffed animals in your bed”,joked Simon and threw a pillow at him. “Hey, be careful, my drink!”, he exclaimed with a feigned outrage. You flipped him off. It wasn’t your fault that you could only go to sleep, while holding something in your arm.

“Don’t pout, come I’ll put the bracelet on. Then we get you a tiara and you’ll be a Disney princess.”Lizzy grabbed the bracelet of your hand and put it on you.

“And put the keychain thing to your keychain–”, Marcus said as they all laughed at your embarrassment. You gave them a look.

“Really guys, do I have to?”, you whined.

“Yes, give it to me, I’ll do it. You open the rest of our presents. I promise you’ll like them”, winked Simon and held out his hand. Reluctantly you gave him the key chain and started to open the other presents.

The other presents were way better. You got some games, wine and everybody plus your mom pitched in to buy you a new bike. They hid it in front of your door before. You had tears in your eyes as you thanked each of them. ‘You had the best friends’

After eating the cake there was nothing to stop you guys from going all out. Drinking games, Beer pong, dancing or just talking. Later on, Lucas and his girlfriend arrived around 10. At this point everybody was in a good mood and slightly drunk. On seeing the bike, Mary was offended that they hadn’t waited for them to give me my present.

You were about to tell her that it was your birthday, when some of the others already apologized to her. Telling her they didn’t know when they would show up.Annoyed, you refilled your drink, and went back to the friends playing beer pong. You needed to get drunk more to be nice to her. She wasn’t even here for 5 minutes and everything had to resolve around her.

The party got louder and better, all having a good time. Half an hour before you wanted to leave Mary came to you while dancing, grabbing your arm. “Is that the bracelet you got from your neighbor? The others told me about it. It's so cute. Can I try it on? I always wanted something like this…”, Mary asked you with her stupid baby voice. She immediately tried grabbing it off your arm.

“Ehm, hey wait a second. Here, but I want back before we go.”, You didn’t want any drama today. She nodded her head, waved you off and reassured you that you would get it back in a second.

You did, in fact, not get it back within a second and when you were standing in the queue to the club, you realized that she still had it on. Now it was too late.

Inside the club your friends surprised you, they booked a small area to sit with a table in the middle. Some drinks and bottles, waiting for you in the middle.

“Guys! You shouldn’t have!”, you exclaimed happily.

“Only the best for you Birthday girl!” Simon cheered! Hugging you tightly. Celebrating your birthday never felt better. You did a few shots and then most of you went off dancing to the dancefloor for the next hour.

Coming back from the dance floor you sat back down exhausted. Every time you went out you asked yourself the same question. ‘Why did you even decide to wear heels today?’ All of you started to get new drinks and someone suggested to spice things up and play an old fashioned “Truth or Dare”. Without truth of course, because it was way too loud.

You loved these games, it was always fun to watch. Though you didn’t like doing dares yourself, always feeling a bit shy and easily embarrassed. Now with the alcohol you did feel more comfortable. Maybe you would be up to do a dare. As if reading your thoughts Simon yelled at you over the table “Y/N”.

You looked at him with pleading eyes, your confidence dwindling. “Noo.. Please…”

“No! I’ve waited enough. I dare you to go out there and make out with a stranger!” he exclaimed, pointing to the dance floor. Some of your friends whistled at that.

Not waiting for you to think about it Simon stood up. “Do you trust me? We go dancing and I promise I won’t let some creep near you. Only handsome guys?” He held out his hand. You thought about it. If not now, when would you ever do it? You needed to get over your own shadow. Quickly you emptied your glass. For the extra bit of confidence.

“Pinky promise?” you asked, feeling bold suddenly and holding out your pinky. He looked surprised and instantly linked your pinky with his. “Promisee.” happily he dragged you to the dance floor.

“What's your age range? Still someone around your age?” Simon asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

You rolled your eyes at his behavior. “I don’t know. He can be older… but not above 50!!” Simon pretended to be shocked at your revelation, holding his hand above his heart.

“Older men! How scandalous!”, you jabbed his side.

“Let's go before I change my mind.”, you threatened. As you made your way on the dance floor they started to play one of your favorite songs ‘Unholy’.

“As information, I’m going back as soon as I see you enjoy yourself. I’m not watching a full make out session from you.”, he shouted in your ear. Laughing, you nodded. Fair enough, you wouldn’t want to watch him make out with Sebastian either. Both of you started dancing to the music, stealing glances at the people around you.

More like Simon was looking around, whereas you tried not to think about the dare too much.

You felt the people dancing all around you. Swinging your hips and moving your arms around your body, you felt yourself getting lost in the music.

Simon and you danced yourself further into the crowd. Someone bumped against your ass, touching it. Before you could even react somebody else pushed that person away. It was not Simon, seeing as he was still dancing right before you. He raised a brow gesturing behind you. Mouthing the simple word ‘Hot’.

While dancing you turned your head slightly to look behind. You couldn’t see much, all the flickering colorful lights made it hard to recognize anything. He was tall, broad shoulders and his hair seemed to be a bit longer. You continued dancing, Simon nodding at you. ‘Fuck it. Simon better not be wrong’ You trusted his judgment. In the rhythm of the music, you danced backwards until you found yourself practically grinding your ass on him. He didn't move away, dancing in sync with you.

One of his hands placed itself on your hip, pulling you even more against him. You felt a sudden rush of confidence, as you continued swaying your ass against him and felt something hardened in his pants. It felt huge.

Using this confidence boost and as a confirmation you spun around, still dancing. ‘Could you do it?’ Looking up at his face, sadly, the flashing lights still barely illuminated his face. Looking closer you could make out a few facial features. He also had a slight beard. Even without knowing his exact looks, you felt a certain pull towards him. ‘I bet he is handsome’ You were not one to make the first move, but you were going to fulfill your dare.

‘You could do it. You looked fucking hot and you wouldn't see him ever again.’ Dancing against him, his slight erection pressing against you, you took the initiative, steadying yourself with one hand at his shirt. 'Why wouldn’t he take the first step? Why did the women need to take control in this situation?' Until now you were always the more experienced partner, so it was nothing new for you. Even though you would like some change. Him taking control, getting rough or just doing what he wants… Maybe you read too many dark romance books.

Slowly wandering with the other hand up his chest, resting it at his neck. Slightly you pulled his head towards you to push your lips onto him. His lips were rough. At first it was just you moving your mouth against his. You felt him putting away his drink on the high table next to you.

As he still did not reciprocate the kiss and for a second you thought that you read the signs wrong. At least you fulfilled your dare. However as soon as you broke the kiss and stepped back, he roughly grabbed your face, pulling you back into him. Surprised by the sudden force of his grip, a small yelp escaped you, before he silenced it with a kiss. The action instantly sent a warm fuzzy feeling down to your core.

Kissing you hard, your mouths moved in sync. His large hand on the side of your face kept your head in place. You winced slightly when he bit your lip, but he hardly seemed to notice. He tried to slip his tongue between your lips, but you denied it.

Trying to gain control of the kiss and situation. You heard a low grumble from him, he seemed discontented with your attitude. You smirked against his lips, which seemed to annoy him further. Moving his hands down your body, he grabbed your ass, hard. The pain going straight into your core, making you moan into his mouth. He seized the opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth.

This time you didn’t even try to get the upper hand, you liked that he was in control. Finally someone who was more dominant in these things. Giving you the time to explore this new, more submissive side. Letting go of your face he moved his hand down your body. Over your chest, stomach and finally resting at your hips, pulling you against him. Goosebumps traveled all over your body, where his hands touched you. Your brain felt dazed, this was the hottest makeout session you ever had. You didn’t care about his roughness or the biting, you rather liked it.

When he broke the kiss you were both panting heavily. Slowly, almost teasing, he traced his fingers up your spine before grabbing you by your hair and tilting your head upwards to look at him. Your mouth parted slightly, a small moan escaped your lips. It stung where he had his grip on your hair, but the slight pain turned you on even more. Sure you knew you liked reading about these kinds of things, but experiencing them made you feel even more aroused.

For a split second, you thought you saw his panting expression change into a smirk. Before you could think twice, he kissed you again. Your mind instantly went blank, his kiss was like a drug. This kiss was slower, still rough but he set the tone. Moving his lips against yours, pushing his hand between your legs. You felt hot, everything felt way too hot to bear, never had you been kissed with such passion. You needed to be closer to him. You tried running your hands down his body.

He removed his hands in an instant, grabbing yours and pushing them back to your sides. You let out a small whine. ‘What was going on with you? You never whined. You felt like a schoolgirl, making out for the first time’ Shaking his head disapprovingly, he turned away to grab his drink. Taking a sip, he held it near your lips, offering it to you. “It’s just water.”

You knew you shouldn’t drink from strangers, though you were way too drunk to think straight or even logically. ‘You wanted to keep making out and if that helped?’ Looking up at him you tilted your head forward against the glass and emptied the whole glass. You didn’t even realize how thirsty you were, and a glass of water seemed like a good option.

“Good girl.”, you heard his deep voice beside your ear. The loud music was making it hard to hear him clearly. The praise went straight to your core. He put his drink away and you began dancing to the music. More like grinding on each other.

He still didn’t allow you to touch him much and you wanted nothing more than to travel your hands up and down on his body, or under his shirt. He leaned down, grabbing your hips to press you against him. Pressing his hard crotch against your lower stomach, making you inhale a sharp breath.

“Can I get your number?” his deep voice mumbled against your ear. You pondered. It felt like he was growling. Slowly he began caressing your ear, gently kissing his way to your neck, making you close your eyes, leaning your head back to give him better access. Your legs were feeling weak. Running his thumb along your jawline, he sucked and bit in your neck, as he kissed his way back to your ear.

“Please?” his voice was a low growl against your ear. Your eyes fluttered open again as you nodded, desire filled your body. You would do anything, if he kept going on like this.

He kissed you softly this time and you bit his lip as he tried ending the kiss. You wanted to kiss him longer. You missed his warmth already, and also missed the dark look flashing up in his eyes. He pulled his phone out, tipping something before handing it to you. As you grabbed his phone, you felt yourself wobble to the side. Luckily he grabbed you in time and stadied you against his body. Now your back was pressed against his front.

You thought about grinding your butt against him, but as if sensing your thoughts he nudged you towards his phone. Looking at the screen, it was truly hard to concentrate for you. He kept sidetracking you by placing soft kisses on your neck.

Blinking rapidly you slowly made out the numbers. Your vision seemed a bit blurry, your eyes feeling so heavy. ‘You didn’t even drink that much’ After what felt like hours you successfully put in your number. As soon as you were done, he grabbed his phone back.

You were so drunk that you didn’t notice the contact already had a name. - Sweetheart - Turning back to him you nearly lost your balance, falling against his chest. His arm wrapped around your side, steadying you as he began walking you through the crowd of dancing people. You found it so difficult to keep your balance, you felt funny. You couldn’t seem to focus, everything stayed a bit blurred. You didn’t even know where he took you. Was he taking you home?

“Hey, sorry to bother you guys.”, he loudly said to someone over the music as he came to a stop. You leaned your face against his shoulder. You were really tired.

“You are her friends, right? I think someone put something in her drink, one minute she was fine and the next she could barely stand.” Your brows furrowed, ‘drugged? You were fine… when should that have happened? Didn’t those drugs work way quicker?’ Shocked gasps filled the air.

“I thought I would bring her back to you, so you can get her home.” He had such a calming and sympathetic voice. ‘Why would he bring you back? You were having fun.’ You playfully bit him in his chest, making him tighten his grip on your hip. His lips pressed in a firm line.

“Yes, yes she is our friend. Oh fuck. Thank you so much man!” Four hands grabbed you off the stranger you were leaning onto. You pouted.

“No-o I don’t wa- want to”, your voice slurred, you sounded like a brat. Struggling against their grip, not wanting to leave his side, but they were stronger than you. Also your fight wasn't really that much of a fight as you thought, you could hardly stand straight. You didn’t even knew his name. His jaw clenched as he looked towards you and the two holding you, his eyes lingered on the arm of the girl.

“Yes yes, hopefully you got his number.”, said a high pitched female voice near your ear. It sounded like Mary. You looked around, it was Lucas and Mary who supported you. ‘Why those two?’

“Why didn’t you tell me you liked older men?” Giggling, you shrugged your shoulders.

“He is so fine, maybe I should talk to him too.” Mary whispered in your ear. ‘What about her boyfriend?’

“Well, thanks again man, I’m Simon, her best friend. We’re taking her home asap, before something happens…” he began, as Lucas and Mary led you away. He gestured for them to stop, but they didn’t look back. Thus you couldn’t hear the rest of the conversation play out. It was a good thing. Drugged or not, your subconsciousness would have freaked out sooner or later.

“No problem Simon. It is what everybody would have done. Call me Cooper.”, he held his hand out for him to shake, which Simon gladly accepted.

“Nah, I don’t think so. Some sick fuck, may have taken advantage of her in a state like that. So thank you Cooper.. Shit, I just wanted her to have a good time on her birthday.”

“Don’t be too hard on yourself Simon. I was glad I could help. Wish her a happy birthday from me, I hope she feels better in the morning.” Simon nodded, turning around to talk with the others and Cooper soon vanished in the crowd. Slowly your friends started to follow the three of you back to the entrance of the club.

“Hey, Y/N you stay here and wait. Lucas and I get the jackets. Just hold onto the handrail of the stairs or sit down. You can stand on your own for a bit, can’t you? ”she asked, concerned and something different in her voice. You gave her a thumbs up before holding onto the railing again.

“We will hurry as best as we can, the others should be here soon.” She came closer, whispering in your ear.

“Also you can stop your show now. Yes it’s your birthday, but do you need that much attention?”, with that she and lucas made her way to the coat check waiting line.

You let your head fall back as you take deep breaths. ‘Show? What show?’ Deeply breathing in the fresh air that was coming from the entrance. Few people were walking past you either coming in or leaving the club. Still it was hard concentrating on anything, but you were doing okay.

Until you weren’t. All of a sudden you felt something against your back and in the next moment you lost your footing and along with the grip on the handrail and flew down the stairs. Instinctively your body tried not to hit the ground face first. For that you turned around to face the top of the stairs. ‘Was there a man?’ you thought. Blinking once whoever you thought you saw was gone, just panicked bystanders. Did you hear Simon?

Your side painfully crashed first into the stairs, then continuing falling further down the stairs. You tried your best to stop or push yourself up, but failed. Someone behind you grabbed your arm to stop you. The only thing it brought you was, that you landed on your foot, with your butt while also twisting it in a painful way.

(A/N: You know, I thought about it, Leaving you hanging right here. However a) I should not end all my chapters the same, you could get bored and b) I’m not evil.)

Pain shot up from your foot, as your tears began to form in your eyes. “Fuck, Y/N.” Simon and Sebastian seemed next to you in mere seconds. Carefully they lifted you off the ground and gently removed your foot from under you. It hurt like hell.

“Is she alright?”, one of the bouncers came towards you from the entrance, having heard the commotion.

“Hey, can you move your foot?” Simon asked. You gave it a try, whining instantly. Crying even more you shook your head, your brain was way too foggy to come up with a smart ass reply.

“Where were you?” yelled an otherwise rather quiet Simon.

“Getting our jackets...” began Mary.

“She was drugged and you left her alone? Are you serious Mary?” Lizzy yelled too, her face enraged.

“How do we know she really was drugged? Maybe she just played it to get away from that man?” Mary suggested in an annoyed tone.

“What the fuck? Did you look at her? Does she seem like a normal drunk to you? You have seen her drunk before, but never like this!”, came Lizzy's angry reply.

“Also from what I saw in the beginning, she sucked his fucking face off! Didn’t seem like she hated it.” Simon countered.

“Why did you even leave her alone in the first place? None of this would have happened! Lucas you have no brain of your own anymore?”, Sebastian joined their yelling. The statement made Lucas' face turn the darkest shade of red.

“Fucking pathetic. Lets get her to the emergency room, someone order an uber?”Simon turned around angrily, and he and Lizzy helped you up. Each of them supported you as you hobbled down towards the streets. The way from the Club to the ER was gone in a blur. You couldn’t remember most of it. One minute you were leaving the club and in the next you laid on a bed in the ER. ‘How did you get here?’

You looked around for your friends, but the room was empty besides Simon who was sitting next to your bed with a worried expression. Your head felt clearer, you cleared your throat.

“So what did the doctor say, Simon? What's the damage?”, better get it over with.

“Well.. bad news first. You have a bruised foot and a hyperextended ligament. As a consequence you have to wear a bandage and walk on crutches for the next month at least.”

You sighed. It seemed like he wasn’t even finished with the bad news yet.

“You also got a few bruises on your arms, legs and back. Buut the Good news– they've given you something to counteract the effects of the drugs, but you'll probably still have to sleep it off, to fully feel better.”

“Better?” you laughed “I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Anything is better than this..”

“I know..” he said as he patted your head. “Listen, they want to keep you here overnight, but just call me in the morning and we will pick you up and drive you home, ok?”

Defeated, you nodded, he squeezed your hand and left soon after. Leaving you alone in the empty room. The rest of the night was uneventful. The nurses checking up on you from time to time, bringing you more water. Sadly they also woke you up at 6 to check your vitals again and give you painkillers. After one final talk with the doctor, getting instructions from him for the next weeks and your crutches, you were ready to go home.

As promised Simon picked you up, he even cleaned your apartment from you and forbade you from helping. He was too kind. He even made Sebastian shop some groceries for you, which he brought over. So you didn’t need to stress about that for the next couple of days. About two hours later they left, telling you to call if you needed something.

You never had a wild birthday like that before, but somehow trouble seemed to find you. It was just a small consolation that nothing had happened to you the last months.

Still exhausted, you laid back on the couch, still in your yesterday's outfit. Closing your eyes as you enjoyed the silence. The ping of your phone ringing loud through the quietness of your apartment. You grabbed your phone and held it above your face. It was from Simon, he left not even a minute ago. Did he forget something? You opened your Phone.

– I totally forgot to tell you something. I meant to wish you a happy birthday from the man from the club last night. He also wished for you to get well soon. –

A second message followed.

– You remember? The one you made out with? He said his name was Cooper. –

Cooper…You knew that name. There was only one person that came to your mind with that exact name. Alarm Bells were going off in your head, but whatever they gave you in the hospital was working. You weren’t shaking or panicking, you were rather calm, what confused you.

That couldn’t be true, no. Surely you would have recognized him, even in the dim light of the club. It wasn’t that dark, was it? You rested your phone on your chest and began thinking about last night. Trying to remember, you realized that reconstructing the evening would be way harder than you thought. There were a lot of gaps in your memories and many were quite foggy. Perhaps it was because of the drugs mixed in your drink.

Sighing you closed your eyes, attempting to recollect what the stranger looked like. He was tall, had a small beard, you didn’t remember his eye or hair color, but his hair was a bit longer? You were unsure. You remembered his large hands on your body, holding your head in place while kissing you. He was strong for sure.

‘Think straight!’ you warned yourself, already starting to feel hot again. Just thinking about it still turned you on. ‘If that was Cooper, the man from that concert. You were fucked.’

You tried to arrange your thoughts. Yes, you made out with him, a serial killer, and you liked it, you felt disgusted. ‘You didn’t know it was him. Why would he even be there? The possibility was close to zero’ Suddenly you remembered something.

Didn’t you drink from his drink? Of course you were drunk before, but after that everything went downhill. Recalling how super drunk and tired you felt soon afterwards. It would all make sense.

Except… Why did he bring you back to your friends then? Perhaps it was a weird coincidence?

Maybe you should ask Simon if his name was really Cooper. Maybe he misunderstood? That looked like a good option. Opening your phone, you started to answer Simon as a new message came in.

It was from an unknown number. A simple: – Happy Birthday Sweetheart. –

It couldn’t be, you changed your number. Not many people called you that and you faintly remember Cooper calling you like that. Before you could wonder about it more, a second message from the same number appeared. What you read then made your heart freeze in fear, your pulse increased and hands started shaking, which made reading the message harder.

– You know, you were always nervous and so easily startled, like a cute little doe. Constantly on alert and looking around, to run away, at the slightest noise. Though if there were a little accident to happen. Where will you go now little doe, if you can’t even run? –

(A/N: nvm i am evil)

#trap 2024 #cooper adams #cooper adams x reader #trap movie #josh hartnett #cooper adams x you #cooper adams x y/n #cooper abott × reader #cooper abott

83 notes · View notes

littlegrapejuice · 1 month ago

Text

Playing The Long Game | LS2

Pairing: Logan Sargeant x Reader

Summary: You've had your fair share of romantic experiences, not all successful. Logan was always there to comfort you, and he's still here years later when you realise that there might be more to your friendship.

Author's Note: ok so my og plan was to write ab lando but @babyunickorn suggested "boy next door/childhood friend logan" in my coms and suddenly my brain became so inspired the idea so here it is🤗

He had witnessed them all.

Your first crush in kindergarten who had picked out a flower for you one day – turned out that he had actually given one to every girl in the class which you learnt the following day.

Your first boyfriend in middle school with whom you’d had your first kiss – it wasn’t that bad per say but you didn’t have any other experience to compare it with at the time.

Your actual first love in high school. He wasn’t like the other popular guys. He knew a lot of people and was an extrovert, but he only had a few close friends that could be counted on one hand. You got along well with him but didn’t pay much attention to him since you didn’t have many common interests. But during your senior year of high school, you two ended up in a class together.

It was the usual cliché story: pairing up for a project, spending time together outside of school – more talking than studying. And when the project was over, he told you he wanted to keep spending time with you. So he asked you out, and you said yes. The next few months were actual bliss. Compared to your first boyfriend – if you could even qualify him as one, this one was sweet and caring. He made you laugh and knew which words you needed to hear – wanted to hear.

He once told you he was falling in love with you fell in love with you, which you believed. And knowing his feelings, it made you fall in love too in the process. You didn’t have any reason not to: he took you out during the weekends, paid for your drinks, and you were facetiming almost every night to talk about your days.

Days that you didn’t spend together.

And that’s when you started having doubts.

Sure, you weren’t in the same class and only had one subject together. However, you were in the same high school and had similar timetables. Did you see him during the day? Yes, sometimes. Did you talk to him? Never. Not like you had never tried: if he was alone or with a couple people you knew, you would go up to him and chat a bit. But every time you were getting a bit too close, he was subtly backing away. You hadn’t noticed at first – or you did and just thought him shy regarding PDA – but then it became more obvious.

Not even glancing at you when you’d pass each other in the hallways. Not returning your waves, nor your gentle smiles. But you put up with it. Because at the end of the day, he would always send you a text, offering to facetime.

Then it got worse.

The texts were scarce and dry. The calls now non-existent. And during one weekend, you had enough after he had ignored you and left you on delivered for several days in a row. So you confronted him when school started again. You had a long talk with him during which he admitted his mistakes. You were ready to accept his apologies until you realised what he was apologising for in the process: he was saying sorry for the past, but also for the future.

He was breaking up with you.

You should’ve known. You didn’t want to know. But it all made sense now. You don’t think you even kept listening after you realised what was happening. He was babbling about things you didn’t want to pay attention to anymore. Half of it was along the lines of “it’s not you, it’s me” and yes, it was all him – that you could agree on. You had been the perfect girlfriend, as perfect as one can be when in love. But he was the one who didn’t love you enough.

Technically, he hadn’t lied about his feelings. They just disappeared as quickly as they appeared. Maybe he’d had an idea of you that didn’t prove itself to be right when he went from having a crush on you to dating you. But you didn’t care at this point, you were just hurt. You could only nod at what he was saying. Your only thoughts were to go home and cry yourself to sleep. That was a good plan.

When you got home though, someone was waiting for you in your room.

Logan.

You had forgotten he had texted you earlier in the day to say he needed your help with homework. But when he saw you walk through the door, any concern about school was quickly discarded and his only reaction was to go hug you as he noticed your red eyes, not yet dry. He immediately knew you’d been crying and the reason why was clear to him.

Nevertheless, he never asked. He wondered obviously, but never questioned you about the details as he easily guessed what had happened.

It took you a couple weeks before you told him the full story. There wasn’t much to say to be honest, but still, he listened. He comforted you and did his best to make you forget.

He was there for you. He had always been there for you.

But you had never noticed him. Never truly noticed him. Not like he saw you. Not like he loved you.

So why now, were you looking at him with such softness in your eyes? Why now, was his smile the most beautiful one in the room? Why now, was your only wish to be close to him and never leave his side?

You were starting to get confused by your own feelings. You didn’t know why suddenly, your gaze kept drifting back to Logan – who was across the room talking with Oscar – when Lando was being a perfect gentleman to you.

“You know, I won’t get hurt if you go to him.”

You were surprised to hear Lando’s voice. You shouldn’t be, you had been conversing with him for the past half hour so it wasn’t weird for him to still talk to you now.

“What?”

“Logan,” Lando replied as if it was obvious. “You’re acting like a high school girl too afraid to go up to her crush right now.”

“I’m not afraid to go talk to Logan”, you mumbled.

“So you’re not denying the crush?” Lando raised an eyebrow at you.

“I– I don’t know…” You were still confused about what was going on in your brain. “It’s complicated.”

“It’s not though.”

“Why would you say that?”

“He likes you, you obviously like him back after so long so go make out or something I don’t know.” Lando shrugged before taking a sip of his drink.

“After so long?” You repeated.

“Yeah. I swear I shouldn’t have befriended Oscar because he came as a package with Logan and I had no choice but to hear about you for like– months before I even met you?”

You had no words. Logan liked you? You don’t know why you never connected the dots but it kinda made sense. Well, everything made sense actually: the support he offered you, the friendship he never gave up on even when he was thousands of miles away from home after his motosports career took off, the letters, the late-night calls, the random visits back home whenever he had a few days off.

“So?” Lando interrupted your thoughts again.

“So what?” You wondered.

“Are you gonna talk to him and confess and then maybe he’ll stop torturing Oscar and I?”

“Oh… Hmm, yeah, yeah…”

“Good, because he’s walking towards us.”

“Excuse me? Right now?”

“Yep”, Lando replied with a grin. “Good luck, name your firstborn after me please.”

“Lando, wait–”

You barely had time to turn to the direction where the British had gone off that Logan was appearing in your field of vision.

“Logan, hi!”

“Hey,” he replied with his signature smile that you loved so much and wished it never left his face. “Everything good? We haven’t talked a lot tonight.”

“All good yes,” you nodded. “That’s true, yeah… But we’re together now so we can chat a bit.”

“I’d like that indeed.”

“You wanna go outside?” You asked Logan, who agreed and led you both to the nearest balcony.

As soon as you stepped outside, you already felt lighter thanks to the nice evening breeze. However, it didn’t last long. Although comfortable, the silence felt heavy to you as you debated about how to start a conversation - the conversation. It had to be tonight. Now that you had somehow realised your feelings for your closest friend, you didn’t think you would be able to keep it a secret for long so your only choice was to get it out as soon as possible.

“I have something to tell you”, you simply stated. Your tone was serious enough that Logan understood it was important. His gaze on you showed you that he was giving you all his attention, but you actually felt overwhelmed by it. “Hmm… Well, I–” Your determination was disappearing extremely quickly; and for a second, you thought about going inside to get a drink that could act as ‘liquid courage’.

“I can talk if you want”, Logan offered. “I kinda have something to tell you too, which I hope is related to what you want to say.”

“Really?” Your voice was suddenly high-pitched as your stress was through the roof. Did he realise so easily what your intentions were? It wouldn’t surprise you now – Logan was smart and observant, especially when it came to you. So you nodded. “Go ahead, yeah…”

“I’m not gonna beat around the bush: I like you,” he confessed with a stoic face. “If I’m being real, I actually love you – I’ve done so for a while, several years I guess. And I hope you do too or else this is gonna be extremely awkward.”

“Y–yeah I do too,” you stuttered as you were too shocked by the revelation. Lando telling you was one thing that you already had a hard time believing, but Logan confirming it felt even crazier. You cleared your throat before speaking up. “I like you too Logan,” you said with more conviction. “Sorry it took me so long to notice, I’m still coming to terms with that myself.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry.” And there it was again, the smile that you cherished. “I would’ve waited forever if needed.”

“Seems like a lot”, you chuckled as a way to seem less nervous.

“Anything for you”, Logan simply replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world for him.

You hadn’t noticed as you had mostly kept your gaze on your hands, but as you finally looked up to face Logan, you realised how close he was to you. You couldn’t help the blush on your cheeks, your face heating up as you felt Logan’s hand brushing against yours. If you’d looked closely, he was blushing too, but your gaze could only focus on how beautiful his eyes looked under the moonlight.

Your name rolled off his tongue as he tried to catch your attention. Your eyes quickly glanced down to his lips before coming back up to his eyes as a way to show that you were listening.

“Is it okay if I kiss you?” He softly asked, almost whispering by fear of ruining the moment.

“I don’t think I want anything else as much as that right now”, you replied with your voice as low as his.

So he obliged, and closed the gap between you. This wasn’t what you’d expected. Sure you’d thought about kissing Logan a couple times – you thought about kissing Logan before? – but this was even better than any other kiss you’d experienced. Way better than your first one, that’s for sure. Because the feelings were here, and they were strong.

And it wasn’t only romantic love that linked the both of you, but platonic love as well. All those years of friendship weren’t meaningless. There was a deep bond between Logan and you, which nothing could ever sever. And when you both pulled away after the kiss, this mixed love could be felt all around you. The joys you’d experienced together, the pains, the highs, the lows, and everything in between.

“Damn, okay…” you sighed as you rested your forehead on Logan’s shoulder.

“Good ‘damn’ or bad ‘damn’?”

“Definitely good”, you replied with a light laugh which made him smile. You could feel Logan’s thumb stroking your hip, making you blush as you thought about how intimate the gesture felt.

“I’m glad then.”

This time, the comfortable silence that settled between you was peaceful for the both of you. But as you thought about your conversation before – well… this, you realised you needed to clarify something.

“Wanna know a secret?”

“From you? Sure.”

“I love you actually”, you confessed. “Not just like, but love.”

“That’s good to know”, he answered. “Wanna know a secret of mine now?”

“Of course I do.”

“It’s more than love for me, like– I’m in love with you.”

“Oh…”

‘Oh’? This wasn’t the reaction Logan had expected as he could feel you freeze in his arms. You slowly backed away – your hands still resting on his chest nevertheless – and looked up to face him.

“You’re sure about that?”

“I– well, yeah?” Logan was confused. Was he sure of his feelings? What kind of question was that? He’d had many doubts in his life, but how he felt about you had never been one.

“Like– sure sure?” You stressed the word to emphasise your question. “You’re not just saying that because we just kissed, and it’s overwhelming, and it might just confuse your judgement so maybe you didn’t actually fall in love but you just love me, with basic love feelings. Don’t feel obligated to say that right now because we’re in the heat of the moment”

Logan was even more confused now as you kept rambling about how he could be mistaken about his own feelings and that maybe he should reconsider and give it a second thought to be certain of how deep his feelings for you were. But then, it clicked as your explanation felt familiar, reminding him of something that happened several years ago.

“Wait– is this about him?”

"I-” You were caught off-guard as you didn’t expect Logan to make the connection so quickly. “I don’t know, maybe…” you replied, looking a bit embarrassed. “Sorry, I'm making things awkward now…”

“It's fine, don't worry. I don't think I actually mind.”

“Really?” You asked, surprised at his words.

“Yeah, I guess…” He tried to find the right phrasing for his thoughts before speaking again. “He's in the past and I'm the one with you right now. And if I ever do something wrong that he did, then I'd like to know so I can try to not repeat it. And if he did something right that I never end up doing for you, then I'd like to know as well so eventually I can do this same thing too. Because even though it didn't last between you, he made you happy for a while and I could never disregard that. But”, he stressed the word to catch your attention. “I know my feelings best, so when I say I’m in love with you: I’m. In. Love. With. You. okay?”

“Understood, yes.”

“I’m glad that we’re on the same page then,” Logan concluded with a smile.

“Still, I’m sorry I never noticed either of our feelings earlier. This could’ve happened sooner”, you assumed.

“Probably not.”

“Why?” You wondered.

“Well, my feelings started developing when I was comforting you and realised you deserved better,” he explained. “I could give you what you deserved, but I just never made a move back then. I wasn’t about to go confess to you when you were still heartbroken.”

“That’s valid,” you agreed. “You got me now, don’t worry. He’s not in the picture anymore and you currently have no other competition.”

“He’s still part of you though, made you the person you are today.”

“I hate that you’re right”, you sighed. “Unfortunately, you never forget your first love even if it hurt.”

“Well, he was your first love, but I kinda want to be your last if you’ll allow me.”

“That’s perfectly fine by me”, you replied with a chuckle.

“So… We’re all good now? I can peacefully be in love with you?” Logan asked with a grin.

“Yes you can,” you nodded. “I fear I’ll be in love with you too soon enough if you keep being sweet like that.”

“I definitely wouldn’t mind that,” was the last thing he said before offering to kiss you again.

And although Logan knew it may actually take a while before you’d be completely in tune with your feelings, he also knew that he had no reason to worry about him. He was just a memory, a bittersweet and nostalgic one. Still part of who you became as a person, but he was in the past. Someone you'd probably never see again. And if you did, you were over him anyway. The only man that mattered to you right now was Logan – the one you currently loved, the one kissing you, the one who'd give you the world and burn it to the ground if it meant that he could see you smile.

Logan had been playing the long game and he was finally rewarded for his years of loyalty. You wished you could go back in the past and tell your younger self that the best friend she’d made when she started primary school would later become her boyfriend – past you would be delighted as she might have had a slight crush on Logan when she met him and he offered to share his pencils so that she could colour the sun drawn in the corner of her paper – but this would be tampering with time.

So if reliving everything that ever happened to you was necessary to end up with Logan now, then you’d do it all over again. And Logan would still wait for you, no matter how long it’d take.

..........

And we're done! I hope y'all liked this, I'm super happy w how it turned out and i think this might be one my fav things ever written

Ngl i kinda put some personal stuff in here and it surprisingly made me feel better bc even tho I'm over the person, idk if I'll ever be over the situation yk so this is a way to keep coping w it years later lmao

Also☝🏻 let's take a minute to celebrate logan posting a few days ago bc i was so glad to see him on my screen, i miss him on the grid sm :(

See you next time, take care of yourself🫶🏻

#logan sargeant #logan sargeant x reader #f1 #f1 x reader #formula 1 #formula 1 x reader #logan sargeant x you #f1 x you #formula 1 x you #ls2 #ls2 x reader #ls2 x you

112 notes · View notes

sirenmoth · 9 months ago

Text

Unrequited

Any COD Man insert x GN!reader

CW: ANGST, hurt/no comfort, mentions of cheating, emotionally unavailable relantionships, military men like to move fast, and yes that is a red flag

It was hard, you knew it would be when you first accepted to date him after only seeing each other for a few weeks, you agreed to let yourself be his. You agreed to long months, sometimes a whole year or more, alone, to the nights tossing and turning, sleepless, in a bed that felt too big. To the tossing and turning from him, sleepless, when the horrors of the battlefield followed him home, of war and what he witnessed out there, tormenting his every unconscious thought. Getting used to the calm and peacful life, a domestic life, away from the bloodshed and death, the pain and the stress, was difficult and you never clamied to understand his stuggles, his pain.

You were complacent, understandably so, hoping to be his rock for when he retured, hoping he could relay on you the same way you relay on him. You knew what he did for work, what he begrudgingly told you at least, he told you of the enemies he's made who would any and everything in their power to hurt him, even if it meant using you to get it. So you stayed quite, never asked for anything extreme, never complained about him missing a date or judged when he forgot your birthday. He never talked to you about how he was feeling, his life, what little he mentioned of his job was vague and short, asking how a misson went got you even vaguer and shorter answers, so you never pushed.

You tried, oh how you tried, for so long you tried to save this inevitably sinking ship, but as the weeks turned to months, months turned to years. You couldn't take it, not anymore, you felt used, unloved, unappreciated.

Were you only here to keep his bed warm when he got home?

Did he have someone else for that? Military men are known for being cheaters, visiting bars and brothels, local clubs and barracks bunnies while having loved ones at home begging for a nice date out or just to spend some time with them. You've read the stories and heard the tales, a lonely lover at home while their other half gives everything up for a few moments of pleasure while away in a differnet country halfway around the world, how it tears families apart.

You didn't want to be another victim in the sea of statistics.

Was he cheating? You never saw him as the type. Yes, you had to beg sometimes to spend time with him or ask him several times to take you out on a nice date, but he never seemed the cheating type. That was until you began to notice the small things, his late night arrivals home from the bars, the scent of cheap body mist, the constant outings with co-workers and friends he would use as excuses for missing the plans you made for each other.

You met them once, his friends, they didn't pay you much mind, a small hello before ignoring you, so you sat at the far end of the booth of some random pub, watching as your man was practically eye-fucking some random bar patron.

You brought up the idea of having a child once, or a pet, something to fill the empty silence, make things feel less lonely, he got mad at you for it, shouting that you were being desperate, needy, deemanding after everything he does for you. You argued back that he hasn't done a single, damn, thing for you, that he's never here, he missed your friends wedding, your new job promotion, your mothers funeral, he's missed so much it was like living with a stranger.

But bringing a child into this life wouldn't fix anything, fix yours or his mistakes, you didn't want that for them. Bringing a child into a broken home wouldn't fix it, a child staying up late at night, wide awake, questioning 'when's daddy coming home?', questioning if he's even coming home alive. You didn't want them to suffer for the chocies you made, for the man for chose to love.

The stress of this life, the constant moving and them having to be the new kid every few years, never living in a permentant home, never having permentant friends, getting asked if their daddy was coming to a school event or their birthday, knowing full well he wasn't, getting asked if they even have a dad, would forver traumaties them, forever scar them.

That was it for you, the last straw.

Tired, that's all you could feel was tired. Tired of asking to be taken out on a small, simple date, one where he was actually attending, asking if he thought you looked nice, asking to be loved.

Tired of him asking you things he should know, when are you getting that job promotion, when's your friend getting married, when's your mother visiting.

You waited until he was sent away to leave, you packed up your things, was there anything of his even here? He spent so much time away or at the barracks on base or in his office, you had gotten used to the cold, empty feeling the house brought, the house you hoped the two of you would call home. Room by room, you packed, taking everything that was yours, leaving nothing behind to remember you by.

Would he even notice you're gone?

You left a few detailed letters, placing it in a location you know where he would see it. The letters detailed everything, your thoughts, your feelings, your concerns and worries, how and were everything went wrong, on your part and on his, how you left like second place to his job and his potentially other partners and lovers. How you tried so hard to make it work, how your tried to be patient hoping he would come around and open up, how you cried on those nights alone in the bed you both once shared, alone in a bed that didn't feel right.

Explained how he didn't do right by you, nor you to him. Explained that you hoped over time things would settle and that you wouldn't have to ask for the bare minimum, but it never happened, nothing changed. How you tried to fix the unfixable while he never bothered to try at all, there was no happy ending or bright future for both of you, you have come to accept that now. It was never meant to be between you two, but you hoped he found someone, someone who could give he him want you couldn't, love him like you could never. Someone who gave him everything and was the complete opposite of you.

You'd be long gone by the time he arrived hom from his deployment, with the extra time he'd spend out drinking or on base, you'd be in a new home with a new job position, a brand new life you built for youself, a brand new life to heal.

Maybe it was the wrong time, maybe you both should've met sooner, or later, maybe this all could've been avoided.

Maybe it was never meant to be.

You don't know if he tried calling or texting, tried reaching out to fix thing after it was already long broken beyond repair, you made sure he couldn't find you as best you could, wanting to leave that chapter of you life, that chapter of sorrow, behind. You wanted to move on.

Has he moved on?

Has he already forgotten you? Did he even care or did he just go bury himself deep inside someone else?

You met someone a few months after leaving, a kind man who took you out on dates without you needing to ask, told you look nice, beautiful, gorgeous. A kind man who went to you friend's wedding, your work parties, accompanied you when you visited your mothers grave. He is everything you could ask for and more.

A warm, bright smile spread across your face, so big it hurt. When was the last time you smiled like this? He took you out on a date, a bar to celebrate your new promotion to a higher branch, he told you how proud he is of you. Just the two of you, enjoying each other's company like nothing else in the world mattered.

Both of you blissfully unaware of a certain militray man looking you across the bar with his friends, a look in his eyes like his world was burning down around him, as he watched the two of you, like he lost the most valuable and precious thing in the world.

But that was lost when you left him, leaving nothing those letters behind. It was lost when he didn't fight for you, when he didn't treat you right.

It was lost when you said enough was enough. He never tried, he put his work first, put his own selfish desires and needs before yours. He was never there, he was always with on a job or with someone else, he was never there to love you, to cherish you, he was never there when you needed him but you alwasy made sure you were there when he needed you.

And he lost you because of it.

Now he's watching you from across a bar, his friend drunkly chatting but he's not listening, he's watching you get everything you ever wanted, everything he never gave you gettting given to you by a different man. A better man.

A man who he will never be.

151 notes · View notes

anthropologyruinseverything · 4 months ago

Text

“Got You”

Jey Uso x IndigenousFMC

8 chapters- 22k words

🚨It’s so smutty I’m so sorry - no one under 18 plz!

🚨 second alarm, there is a triggering scene but it is an attempted assault that is interrupted - there is a note around it so it is easy to skip!

Just collecting all 4 parts into one loooong post. It’s unedited so I apologize for mistakes and timelines messiness

Summary: Rori Begay is Jey Uso’s nanny. Inappropriate feelings begin to brew between them over lockdown and they try to avoid it. Unfortunately the violence in Rori’s home life boils over and so do their feelings for each other when he comes to her rescue.

Chapter 1:

Aurora POV

“My Rori’s here!” Jason lunged from his father’s arms into mine as soon as I made it through the door of the unassuming but well kept blue house.

“Hey little dude!” I gladly received the three year old, doing my best to avoid touching Josh too much in doing so. Every time we so much as brushed hands it caused a rolling wave of butterflies and warmth. Not unpleasant but also not an appropriate thing to feel for someone who was technically my boss. And the last thing I needed in my life right now was to lose my job, especially over a stupid crush.

Due to the pandemic ramping up Josh was home from his job that normally demanded a lot of travel. Even though he wasn’t traveling he still had commitments and a job that required several hours of training daily in the gym on top of meetings and zoom calls. He’d explained the plan his company had until they could safely begin touring again, a plan that would see them staying here in Florida for several months to a year.

Long enough for me to save up enough to get out of my own place, even if my mother was demanding a high rent. I was glad I’d fibbed about just how much Josh was paying me weekly or she would have demanded even more.

“Swim! Swim! Wanna go swimming!” I juggled the excited toddler in my arms trying not to drop my day bag.

Coming to the rescue Josh grabbed the green backpack and smiled at me in a way that turned my insides to mush. “We gotta eat first little man.”

“Are you free today?” I hoped I didn’t sound as excited as I felt. At first I’d found it odd he still wanted me there even when he wasn’t going to be busy for the day but quickly started to look forward to spending time with both of them.

“Yeah, my meetings were cancelled. I was thinking I’d join y’all for swimming lessons and whatever else you got planned. If that’s cool with you.”

As if I was going to say no.

I looked at Jason with a grin. “Whaddya think? Want Daddy to hang out with us today?”

“Hang out with daddy AND Rori! Swim!”

“What about you?” It was hard not to read too much into his expression or the way his voice seemed to drop a little. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

Oh, of course. He’s trying to be considerate of my feelings as a person and I’m drooling at the way his voice changes when he is speaking to another adult. I swallowed my embarrassment and put on a big grin. “Not at all, it’ll be great to hangout! Now how about some breakfast?”

There wasn’t much Jason loved more than swimming but one thing was for certain.

“PANCAKES!”

—-

Jey POV

It did things to me when she called me “Daddy”, even if it was in this context.

Maybe I could get Joe or Braun to hit me in the head next time we’re wrestling.

Really, really hard.

Well, maybe not Braun, I didn’t want to die after all.

I needed some sense knocked back into me around this girl though. I can’t keep my eyes off her and thought about her way too often. She’s only eighteen and I should not be feeling this way about my sons *nanny.* Watching her as she moved around the kitchen, letting little man help her with making breakfast it brought an excited sense of peace.

My eyes dutifully followed the sway of her curvy bottom as she sidestepped small feet with a laugh. I wanted to wind my hands into that waist length brunette hair while I devoured her pouty lips.

Wanted to see her pretty green eyes tear up with those lips wrapped around my dick.

I wanted a lot of things from Miss Aurora Begay.

Isolating was hard, I hadn’t had a chance to go out or hookup with a chick since New Year’s Eve. Maybe that was my problem. She was close, pretty and had a great laugh.

But the truth was I hadn’t wanted someone so bad in a long time. Jason’s mom had burned me pretty hard when she decided she didn’t want to be invested in his life, or mine.

You travel too much she’d said. Come to find out “you travel too much” really meant I’d rather be fucking other dudes in another country.

More power to her. We’d started out casual but when she fell pregnant I’d stepped up and even offered to marry her and let myself get invested. Not the best way to start but I was willing to give it a shot for him.

“How many?”

“Huh?”

Rori pulled me out of my thoughts with a light tough to my shoulder and a giggle. She smiled down at me. “I asked you how many pancakes would you like? I’m using the protein mix.”

Of course she’d ferreted out the healthiest pancakes for someone with my training regime. She was always doing thoughtful shit like that and I loved it. Loved that she would modify things for me, make me a plate or keep one warm for me in the oven when something ran longer than planned.

It was hard not to let all that spill.

She raised her eyebrows. “Josh?”

I’m so fucked.

“Uh, make it four.”

Thirty minutes later and I’m waiting for them the come downstairs. Jason appeared at the top of the steps first in his matching swimming trunks and shirt all decked out with tiger sharks. His favorite animal at the moment. He proudly held up his shark goggles. “Look daddy, I’m a shark!”

In a weird way I was grateful for the lockdown. I’d never been able to spend so much time with him and it made me happier than I’d ever been. “I see little man! Where’s Rori?”

“Coming, sorry!”

Chapter 2 -

Aurora POV

Josh stood at the bottom of the steps in nothing but black swimming trunks. My mouth went dry and heart pounded as I tried not to stare at him while Jason and I made our way downstairs hand in hand. It was tough though, his dark bronze skin and spiraling tattoos were mesmerizing.

He’d given me a cursory glance before looking away and even though I’m not terribly vain, it stung my pride a little. I should be ashamed that I picked the cheap and simple but pretty blue mesh halter and boy short set because I thought be would like it. As if he’d ever look at me the same way I do him.

Tucking the sadness away I padded out to the pool with Jason who was already fighting with his arm floats before he’d made it to the water. “Here let me help-“

The words were cut off by splash of water, my own shriek of surprise and Jason’s shriek of laughter. Josh had blown by us to canon ball into the water before surfacing with a challenging smirk.

It would be hard to ignore the heat pooling between my legs.

Well, until little man threw his arms up and demanded to be thrown in for a big splash that is. Happy to oblige and to cool off I scooped him up and we jumped in. What I’d planned as a swimming lesson turned into lots of laughing and splashing with Jason getting brave enough to paddle back and forth between us a few times.

After a while he was tired and become more preoccupied with making his pool toy shark eat his other action figures. Josh drifted over to where I stood in the shallow water while Jason played nearby on the step. “Hey.”

“Hey?”

“What happened here?” Gently he brought his fingers to a healing bruise on my arm. Anxiety twisted my stomach painfully. I had to come up with something, my mother had trained me to lie about this sort of thing.

“Oh, uh, I just, I just dropped something when I was reaching for a can on a shelf at home. Clumsy, just brought my arm up so it wouldn’t like hit me on the face or anything. Nothing, no worries.” I realized I was rambling when his brow furrowed and he narrowed his eyes.

Fuck. He didn’t need to know mom’s latest boyfriend was a real dick, even for her.

“A can huh?”

The truth was I hadn’t moved fast enough to get out of his way a couple days ago and so he grabbed me by the arm, hard enough to leave those prints, shook me and slung me across the room. Not the first time one of the men she’d brought home had done something similar but no one had ever really paid attention and my mom had threatened me with much worse if I ever told.

“Yeah, just a stupid accident.” I tried to smile reassuringly but could tell it wasn’t working. Josh opened his mouth but fortunately for me, little man chose then to pounce, throwing himself at us with abandon only a happy toddler could achieve.

“Make splashes Rori!”

“You sure did! How about we get dried off and go watch a movie?” I was grateful for the distraction. Hopefully he would let it go.

—-

Jey POV

Late that night I laid in bed scrolling through photos from the last few weeks, looking for clues and wracking my brain for an explanation. Aurora had never lied to me before and I should have her drug tested if she thought I bought that story about the can. I know what a bruise from someone gripping you too tightly looks like. Why was she being so evasive about it?

*Does she have a boyfriend? Some little shit who thinks he’s tough?*

An intense anger erupted in my chest at the thought of anyone putting their hands on her. In any way. Thinking about her kissing someone else, *fucking* someone else, made me physically sick.

I resolved to get the the bottom of it. Why weren’t her parents doing anything about it? Did they notice?

Wait. Does she live with them?

It dawned on me that I know next to nothing about her or her living situation. Most of our conversations revolve around Jason or the chores or how my day had been or what I wanted for dinner. I knew she was a college student and we’d chatted about a few times about things like music or movies or my job but never had she mentioned her family or friends or relationships at all, except one girl named Jamie. And all I knew about her was that they’d seen a movie together recently.

I’d snapped a few pictures today. Only one of just her but that was the one I settled on looking at. She stood mid thigh in the pool, her golden skin wet and the red of her messy bun stood out in the sunlight. The swimsuit wasn’t too revealing but I’d almost embarrassed myself. Seeing her coming down the steps it that simple but sexy outfit had me at half mast in no time, I’d had no choice but to hustle my ass into the cold pool or risk her noticing.

Looking at the picture now I had the same problem, my cock twitching to life at the thought of tasting her everywhere. Closing my eyes I dropped my phone and let myself pull my boxers down. Picturing her sweet smile I imagined she was there with me, straddling my waist, her walls clenched tightly around me.

Slowly I started stroking myself, imaginary Aurora’s movements were careful and shy and gentle, just like everything else about her. Her small hands braced against my chest, fingers digging in as her cheeks flushed with pleasure and she panted in need.

*”Daddy, please.”*

Increasing my pace I imagined taking control, clutching her hips and bracing myself with my ankles as I thrust up at a much more aggressive pace. My knees drew up and I clutched the sheet with my free hand as her cries filled my ears.

*”Harder Daddy, yes yes! I’m gonna cum!”*

I didn’t fight the groan that rose in my throat as I sped up even more. It was my fantasy and we would finish together.

“Fuck Rori, baby…” I bit my lip when I came, spilling hot ropes of cum onto my stomach as my hips bucked and twitched. For a few seconds I lay there panting.

I’d lost count of how many times I’d gotten off this exact same way now. I knew I should stop but it was becoming something of an obsession. It wouldn’t be the first time in my life I’d developed a fixation, just not quite so focused in on a particular female before.

I hoped it would pass when the lockdowns lifted and I could go out again but deep inside I knew that wouldn’t be the case.

No, something about those big hazel eyes and loving personality had dug itself deep inside me. I swiped at the mess I’d made with my shirt before throwing it in the hamper in the corner of the room. A twisted part of me hoped she’d notice when she did laundry and wonder if I was thinking about her but the realistic part of me would kick in and handle the mess in the morning.

Settling in to the covers I hoped she was comfortable and safe, wherever she was.

Chapter 3

Aurora POV -

I didn’t mind biking the thirty minutes from the trailer park where I lived to the nice suburb. Being alone with my music and a direction was meditative. This morning however it wasn’t as nice as usual. Unable to stand for leverage I was moving slower than usual, my injured right side making the whole process more difficult.

Janine’s latest catch, ‘Paul’, was becoming increasingly violent. I did my best to stay out of his way but the two bedroom single wide trailer was tiny, cramped and rundown. Most of my time at home was spent locked up in my bedroom, venturing out only to fix everyone dinner or use the restroom.

Not long now and I would be able to afford a deposit for a room somewhere. I let daydreams of the day I left that place forever fuel me through the pain in my ribs and ankle. I’d gotten distracted, inadvertently letting the dinner pot boil over. Paul took offense and sent me to the floor with a nasty shove before a swift kick to the ribs. I’d scrambled to my feet and limped to my room, slamming the door shut and locking it behind me. A fresh wave of anxiety shuddered through me.

I planned to ask Josh today if he would show me a few things I could do to be stronger and defend myself better. It might rouse his suspicions but I was just going to tell him a half truth, I wanted to be safe when I returned to campus someday. That was a safe and believable excuse in my mind.

Taking a deep breath I tried to force myself to walk normally in spite of the sharp pain that came with each step. Maybe I was naive to think I could disguise my injuries but I was going to try.

Answering the door rather quickly he welcomed me in and our day progressed as usual. Fortunately for me Josh had to tend to those cancelled meetings and would be busy until lunch time. I thought I had it under control with some Tylenol but was proven wrong.

Jason wanted a specific shark cup and plate set that was stored on a high shelf. Normally pulling out the little step stool and grabbing those things wouldn’t have been an issue.

Normally.

When I tried to put weight on that right ankle it gave and I yelped, falling backwards fully expecting to land hard on the kitchen tile.

Instead a strong pair of arms encircled my middle and I made contact with a hard, warm chest instead of cold, unforgiving floor. The pressure on my ribs hurt and I gasped, clutching at Josh’s forearms.

“Rori!” Jason’s alarmed voice hit my ears and I immediately tried to right myself and go to him but struggling against the hold hurt too much.

“It’s okay kiddo, I got her. Where are you hurt? Other than your foot?”

“Ribs.” It hurt to take in a breath to speak.

Nodding he maneuvered one arm under my knees and one under my shoulders, easily hefting me up into his arms. “I got you.”

I wanted to curl into a ball and never look at him again, this was too embarrassing. Settling me in a chair at the kitchen table he took a very clinical approach to examining my ankle and ribs. If I hadn’t been so upset the feeling of his fingers dancing on my rib cage would have made me dizzy. He let me catch my breath before asking the dreaded question.

“What happened Rori?” Josh sounded calm and collected as he went to retrieve an ice pack. Passing it to me he set about fixing lunch while waiting patiently for an answer.

“I tripped walking up my steps last night and fell. Nothing major, just some bruises.”

“You’re lucky they’re not broken.” My stomach dropped. It sounded like he was scolding me.

“Rori okay?”

“Yeah little man, I’m all good! Just an accident, no big deal!” I raised my hands in the air and smiled at Jason who looked relieved before going back to playing with his toys.

Josh set lunch on the table, ravioli, before collecting the little boy and depositing him in his booster seat next to me. Sitting down on my other side all of his moments were stiff. “You wouldn’t lie to me would you?”

My palms went sweaty and my heart pounded. I hoped my panic didn’t show on my face. Not trusting my voice I shook my head no and stuffed a piece of pasta in my mouth, making a pleased sound. I swallowed the food and the emotion all in one go. “No. I’m so sorry. It shouldn’t stop me from what I need to do again.”

“It’s fine. You rode your bike here yeah?”

I nodded and shoveled another bite in my mouth to avoid talking.

“Me and Jason are gonna drive you home this afternoon, once my meetings are done.”

A fresh wave of panic rolled through me. “No-no, please you don’t have to do that.”

“You’re in no shape to be riding your bike anywhere.” His voice was so cold. It made me want to cry.

“I don’t want to be a pain. I can ride the bus-“

Jason and I both jumped when Josh slapped the table. He seemed to catch himself before slamming it with full force but still made a loud noise. Quickly he looked at his son with a grin to ease any fear the little boy had.

But when he turned to me I could see it didn’t reach his eyes. His expression flattened out and it was like he was reigning himself back in.

I squeezed my thighs together as a confusing rush of emotions hit me. Fear of the consequences since I’d angered him and a strange flash of arousal that felt out of place but there it was all the same.

“Don’t argue with me.”

“Yes sir.”

—

Jey POV

Sitting through these afternoon meetings around the new Bloodline merchandise was torture. I’d never been a fan of this side of the job anyway and whatever was going on with Aurora was eating at me. Had I been a little bit of a bully and let my anger win for a minute? Absolutely but it will get me what I want which is some more information.

I was pretty sure someone was hurting her at home or she had a boyfriend. Thinking through my options I texted my twin who was also on the zoom call looking like he’d rather eat a shoe than look at yet another piece of concept art.

‘**Can yall take little man this weekend?**

I watched him respond on the call.

**’Yeah, you got something to do?’**

**Yeah**

It wasn’t often that I hid things from Jon but he didn’t need to know I was planning on essentially stalking my barely legal nanny for a couple of days. I sure as hell didn’t want to see Trinity’s face if she found out. But I had to know what was going on and figure out how to help her.

As of right now my plan was little more than to storm in, beat the ever living shit out of whoever I needed to, sweep her up and move her into my home and bed permanently. Far from foolproof but it was a work progress.

Finally the meeting came to a close. Heading downstairs I took a few deep breaths to make sure I had my temper fully back under control. It had been hard not to shake her by the shoulders and demand she tell me the truth so I’d settled on slapping the table for emphasis. I’d instantly felt like a jerk when both Jason and Aurora jumped in fear but we’d recovered.

The sounds of their laughter came from the kitchen, she was letting Jason ‘help’ her make pizza for dinner. Looked more to me like she was chasing the veggies he threw every which direction except at the dough in front of him but I enjoyed watching them together all the same. She genuinely seemed to enjoy spending time with him and he loved her already, taking to calling her “my Rori”. Clearing my throat to announce my presence I felt a stab of regret when anxiety fell over her face and she quieted instantly. Jason on the other hand clambered down from the step stool and rushed over, arms outstretched.

“Daddy! Look, making pizzas!” He waved excitedly towards where Rori leaned against the counter next to the bowls of ingredients. I tried to smile reassuringly at her but she just ducked her head, hiding her face with her hair.

“Nice, want some extra help Rori?” Jason was already trying to get down and back into the mix so I let him. It wasn’t the nicest thing, forcing her to talk to me, but she’ll learn to speak up for herself in time.

She would have to as my woman. I don’t know exactly when I decided that was going to happen but here we are.

Finally glancing up at me she bit her lip nervously. “Yes sir.”

An image of her doing that while on her knees in front of me flashed through my mind. I liked that a little too much, liked this oddly submissive behavior. It told me a lot to, her response to my anger. Fawning is what they call it, if I recalled the therapist correctly.

I stepped into her space deliberately, causing her to shy away from my hand. Persisting I gently caught her chin with my thumb and forefinger making her eyes go wide. Tempting as it was to push further and run my thumb over her abused lip I settled for making her look at me.

“M’sorry I scared you earlier.”

She blinked, her eyebrows drawing together in confusion. “You’re what?”

I snorted. “Girl I’m tryin to apologize to you. Pay attention.”

To her credit she recovered quickly. “I’m sorry, I am. I - it’s okay. Let’s get these pizzas in the oven.”

She pulled away but before I saw her pulse pounding in her neck and her eyes dilate. It was obvious she was into what I was doing. Perfect.

A little over an hour later found us loading up her bike into the back of my truck and heading down the highway. It never ceased to amaze me what being on either side of the highway could look like. Some trailer parks were nice with well kept homes, flowers and friendly neighbors. Some were like ‘Martin’s Cove’ complete with meth trailers, cars on blocks and folks toting guns in the waist bands of their jeans. I bristled at the thought of leaving her here but dutifully got out to retrieve her bike once we’d pulled up to #37.

An ugly white man stood on the porch with a stupid look on his face. I hated him. Rori’s face showed a flicker of fear when her eyes landed on him and I wanted to kill him. I had a feeling I knew who was leaving the bruises. I held onto her bike when she went to take it from me.

“Uh, Josh? I got it. Thank you so much again.” I could feel my blood pounding in my ears. The man hadn’t spoken but hadn’t looked away from Aurora either.

“Promise to call if you ever need help.” She tilted her head but must have remembered earlier today.

“Okay, I promise.”

I nodded. “I’ll pull up at eight.”

It made me physically sick to let her walk away but I did it. Once they’d both gone inside I pulled away. Jason fell asleep before we made it home so I got him tucked into bed and set about putting a bag together for his stay at his aunt and uncles this weekend.

I was too worried to sleep well, knowing full well she could be in trouble. Instead I found myself praying whatever gods or ancestors might be listening. The morning couldn’t come soon enough.

Chapter 4

Aurora POV

I stood on the embarrassingly cluttered porch the following morning at 7:30 A.M. Janine and Paul were still in bed. Much to my surprise they hadn’t questioned me in depth, instead disappearing into her room after I made their dinner. I checked the calendar, it was the third.

Ah, her disability check had come in. They’d be flush with drugs for a couple days.

Great, that usually meant they’d leave me alone. And they had. Looking back at the front door yet again, it felt as if it were going to open and swallow me. That’s how it felt to walk into this house, like I was being eaten by a beast snd may never claw my way out.

Turning back I settled on the steps, flipping through my music. “Dirty Thoughts” started playing and I felt a flush start up my neck remembering what I’d done listening to this song last night. After securing my door that lacked a proper lock I’d lain in bed playing my interactions with Josh over in my head. Mostly the feeling of his thick arms and hard chest and calloused hands.

Only a few times, mostly due to lack of privacy, did I indulge the growing heat between my legs. Thinking about Josh had made the throbbing ache there unbearable and when I slid my fingers below the elastic waistband of my underwear I found myself soaked. While still very much a virgin I’d read enough romance novels to know what my body wanted from him. My heart and mind did too but they were a lot harder to make happy.

Carefully I’d started to feel myself, fingers dipping into my wet slit to awkwardly circle my clit while my other hand cupped a breast, lightly playing over a sensitive nipple. My inexperience was a pain though and after a few moments of awkward strokes I was worse off than before I started. Annoyed at myself for struggling I switched tactics to what I knew would provide at least a little relief.

Grabbing my ancient pillow I shoved it between my legs, balled up and pressed tightly to the small bud I was struggling to figure out. Closing my eyes I’d imagined sitting on his lap, straddling one of his big thighs while his hands cupped my bottom and his voice, deep and husky with want, encouraged me to move.

*”C’mon girl, that’s it. Move for Daddy.”*

It shamed me to think of him that way but I was so lost to the feeling it didn’t stick. Doing as imaginary Josh instructed I ground against the pillow, desperately seeking the short but intense flashes of pleasure it brought. If I did it long and hard enough I’d get a sharp spike that would somewhat ease the tension filling my body. It was nothing like “rolling waves” I read about but it did the trick and wore me out enough to sleep.

The sound of his truck rumbling up pulled me out of my memory and I stood, checking the time. 7:40 A.M., he was early. I needed to get myself under control, this crush was a distraction I didn’t need. What I needed was to get the hell out of this place before things escalated further and finish my degree.

And yeah I wanted kids and a husband and all that lovely stuff but I wasn’t naive enough to believe that Josh was the guy. He smiled at me, opening the passenger door and ushering me in. My heart did a cartwheel in my chest.

He had his choice of anyone. It would never be me and I was alright with that.

It didn’t stop me from wishing it were though.

“My Rori!” Jason’s voice was music to my ears. It was just Josh I’d fallen hard for after all. The toddler waving happily from his car seat in the back lit up my world and motivated me to get out of bed some mornings when I was depressed.

“Hey little man!” I smiled at him before turning to Josh as he pulled out of our driveway. This felt so normal and nice it was almost enough to make me forget where we were driving away from.

“Mornin. How was your night?” I noticed the dark circles under his eyes.

I blushed in spite of myself. “It was good. How about you?”

Josh raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment on the red in my cheeks. “S’fine.”

I mulled over my idea about asking for his help while chattering along with Jason. I’d couched the idea when he was so stern yesterday but he didn’t seem angry any longer and had apologized after all. By the time we pulled into the driveway I’d made up my mind. I spoke before he could open the door.

“Hey, Josh?”

“Hmm?” He tilted his head my way.

“Could-is it okay to ask- because if not I understand-“

“It’s fine just ask your question baby.”

My brain shorted out for a split second. He’s tired, don’t overthink it.

“Can you show me how to like, get stronger? And maybe how to, ya know, throw a punch? For when I go back to campus.” I bit my lip nervously, his expression was so neutral it was impossible to know what he was thinking.

Josh reached over to give my knee a squeeze and my warmth flooded through me. It was so quick I wondered if I’d imagined it but the genuinely warm half smile said otherwise.

“Hell yeah I’ll show you some stuff.”

My heart pounded as I followed the boys inside. I have to get a grip, he’s just being nice. A single quick squeeze doesn’t mean he’s into me.

I noticed the bag of Jason’s things on the couch and my heart dropped. If he was going somewhere else I may not have work for a while.

“Is little man going somewhere?”

“Yeah, my brother’s coming by to get him later, just for the weekend. I’m gonna get some sleep but we can workout some this afternoon, if you’re up for starting now. Just have to work around what’s hurtin.”

My heart soared. “Great, thank you so much.”

——

Jey POV

It was easy to sleep knowing she was safe downstairs with Jason and I made up for what I lost the night before. In my dreams Rori was beneath me, writhing in

pleasure while her fingernails dug into my shoulders and her lips whispered my name over and over like a prayer. Her voice got louder the closer she came to orgasm and I ground into her harder and harder.

“Josh…Josh…Hey Josh?”

Her voice went from thick with pleasure to confusingly loud. Slowly I became aware of someone shaking my shoulder.

“Huh?”

There was a soft giggle from next to me as the bed dipped a little. I realized the object of my dreams was sitting next to me nudging my shoulder. At the same time I realized I had a raging hard on.

“Jon’s here, figured you’d want to say bye to Jason before they took off.”

Shit was it after five already?

I had to get rid of her so I could get this under control. “Yeah. Be right there.”

When I didn’t move immediately she jumped up and ran like she’d been scalded. Maybe she realized she may have crossed a line coming in here, even if it was to get me up for something important.

I couldn’t wait to cross a hell of a lot more lines with her in this room.

But right this minute I needed to get myself presentable, something easy enough to achieve, at least temporarily, with a few deep breaths and splashing some ice cold water on my face.

Loading Jason into the car didn’t take long, he always loved staying with his cousins. Hugging him one last time I stepped back. My brother looked at me from the drivers seat, clearly wanting an explanation. Clapping his shoulder I smiled. “Thanks, got a leak and it’ll just be a lot easier to have guys out to fix it without him under my feet.”

The suspicion in his face melted away and we said our goodbyes. I’d miss Jason but I was excited about “working out” with Aurora, all alone. Not to mention I’d finally have a good chance to question her some. She stood in the kitchen tying up her hair when I walked back in.

“You ready?”

Aurora swallowed but nodded and I noticed her eyes flicker over me. My cock twitched, it was hot thinking she wanted me too. I still needed to clarify whether or not she had a boyfriend and while I couldn’t be certain it was that weird guy at her house who was hurting her I was pretty confident that was the case.

“Good, c’mon.” Leading her into the gym I flicked the lights on.

About 45 minutes later and she flopped on the floor, panting but smiling. Turns out she could throw a decent punch already. Settling behind her on my knees I let my hands fall on her shoulders and waited to see what she would do. Aurora stiffened but didn’t pull away so I slowly began to knead the muscles.

“You did good.” I don’t know if it was my fingers or my words that did it but she moaned softly, her cheeks blushing.

“Thank you.” Her voice was soft and shy.

Continuing up her neck I was gentle as I worked the tension there, surprised at just how tight she was. I decided to get down to what I wanted to know. “Got a boyfriend Rori?”

She blinked her pretty hazel eyes before huffing out a nervous laugh. “A boyfriend? No.”

Relieved, I let that concern go. “Aight. I didn’t think that guy in the porch yesterday was him but ya know, wanted to make sure.” I dug my fingers in a little harder and she drew in a breath with a gasp. My thumbs worked their way down her shoulder blades and her eyes drifted closed. Her muscles quivered under the threadbare tshirt she wore but my eyes were trained on the wet skin of her jaw and neck. I imagined what it would taste like to run my tongue along them in a long stroke.

“Nah, that’s just my mom’s latest boyfriend.”

“Latest?” I didn’t like the sound of that and based on where they lived I doubted these were high quality men drifting in and out of their lives. Already I hated this woman for putting Aurora in danger.

“Yeah, she’s just…I don’t know. She’s got some issues.” Aurora trailed off and I debated how hard to push. This was more than I’d gotten out of her before but I didn’t want her to shut down if I asked the wrong thing. I kept massaging her neck, working my way a little lower to her collar bone and she didn’t resist.

“How’s that feel?”

“Mmm, good.” Just when I thought she was really going to relax into me her phone buzzed. I hated the way she looked panicked when she opened the message. “Oh no, it’s getting really late, I should go.”

Reluctantly I let her stand and got to my feet as well. “C’mon, I’ll take you home.”

Her nerves seemed to get worse and worse during the car ride. Every instinct in me screamed to make her stay, to not drop her off at that trailer. Something bad was going to happen and I knew it.

This time I reached over her to stop her from opening the door with one hand and grabbed her knee with the other. “Aurora look at me.”

She was startled but did as I asked.

“You don’t have to get out of this truck. But if you do, just promise to call me if you’re in trouble.” For a second I thought she was going to stay or maybe burst into tears. Instead she took a deep breath and smiled at me but it didn’t reach her eyes.

“I promise. Again.”

I squeezed her leg one more time before sitting back and letting her go. Something screamed at me to stop her but I didn’t.

I’d regret that sooner than later.

Chapter 5

Aurora POV -

I knew something was up the minute I walked in the front door, a sixth sense of sorts from years of living with a volatile drug addict. My heart skipped a beat when I realized my mother was in the dingy kitchenette stirring away at something on the stove. She never cooked anymore and anything out of the ordinary was cause for concern.

“Oh you’re home, I wondered if we’d see you tonight.”

Stomach twisting I approached her carefully. I’d only responded to her message five times apologizing for being late. “I’m sorry mama, I had to stay late for work.”

“You’re sure it was just for work? I didn’t see a baby in the car today.” Of course she’d been watching from the windows.

“Yes mama, Mr. Fatu offered me rides and I felt rude saying no.” Her face pinched but she recovered into a smile. I could feel the dread building in my lower spine.

“Go sit down honey, dinner is ready and Paul just pulled up with his friend.” Almost anyone else would have written her words off as a normal statement but from her it was a threat, I just didn’t know for what.

“Yes ma’am.”

Paul came clattering in followed closely by another white man who looked meaner and uglier than him. He smiled when he saw me, licking his chapped lips from behind a patchy beard. I shivered in disgust.

“This here is Danny. Aurora, be nice and say hi.” Awkwardly I waved, in fear of what would happen if I didn’t.

He looked at Paul with his beady, murky blue eyes. “She always quiet?”

Paul nodded. “Whaddya think?”

Danny smirked. “How much did you say?”

My heart plummeted to my feet as I stood. “What’s going on?”

All three other people stopped what they were doing. Danny looked amused and Paul looked at my mother expectantly. She came to pat my shoulder with a fake, cold smile.

“Well since you’ve been whoring yourself to your boss we figured you wouldn’t mind if we set you up with some new clients. And this way we make sure we get our cut, fair and square.” Her voice was so calm, mocking me with how caring and sweet she sounded even though her words were poison.

My jaw fell open and my stomach heaved. I couldn’t believe what just was hearing.

“I’m not sleeping with my boss!”

She’d sunk low before but this was completely unreal. I couldn’t believe she would actually agree to pimp me out.

“So, uh, where we gonna do this?” Danny reminded me of his presence.

I wanted to claw the nasty man’s eyes out and run. To where?

*Josh.*

“We’re not! Mom, tell him this is ridiculous, you can’t be serious!”

Pulling out my phone I got off a single message to Josh before Paul was snatching for it.

“SOS” with an alarm emoji.

^^^Trigger warning for attempted SA scene^^^

“Her bedroom is that way.” I’d never hated her so much as I did in that moment when she pointed down the narrow hall.

“No! Mom! Mom!” I shrieked as each man grabbed an arm and begin pulling me.

Danny snarled when I twisted and landed a nasty blow between my shoulders, sending me to the floor. He looked at Paul who gave me another swift kick to the side. “Didn’t tell me you hadn’t broken her in yet.”

“I’ll let you have the next session for free if you wanna help with that.”

With a shrug the other man grabbed my wrist and pulled hard in spite of my struggling. Throwing me onto my rickety twin bed I scrambled, trying to get to a weapon but he was already laying into me with the leather belt he’d pulled from around his waist. My ancient tshirt gave way easily under his hands, giving him direct access to the flesh of my back and shoulders. Blows rained down, burning so fiercely my eyes stung with tears. I curled into the fetal position, covering my head and trying to escape the worst of it.

He stopped hitting me to wrap the leather strap around my wrists and flipped me onto my abused back. Kicking at him didn’t do much even with my healthy ankle. I was tired and sore from the injuries and work out Josh had put me through earlier. My strength to fight was waining fast but I couldn’t just give up. Danny responded to a kick in the shoulder with a powerful punch to the stomach, making me gag and cough.

My jeans didn’t come off as easily as my tshirt but he managed with a few vicious yanks. I didn’t know how to get out of this. Closing my eyes I tried to picture Josh, Jason, my friends, my school, anything to get away from the gut wrenching reality of what was happening. My mother had sold me to this man and his awfully slimy hands were running up my thighs and over my ribs to squeeze my breasts with so much force it tore a lot sob of pain out of my chest.

End of triggering scene

And then, with a yelp of pained surprise, he was gone. For a few seconds all I could hear was the thundering of my pulse but once my body realized he was no longer bearing down on me my senses began to adjust. Shouts and thuds from the living room went on for a few more moments before a particularly nasty sounding crash and then it all went quiet. Unsure of what was going on I remained where I was, shaking and trying to get a grip on my breathing.

Finally I could hear a voice speaking clearly. A voice I knew.

“Don’t move you fuckin cunt.”

Josh appeared in the doorway of my tiny and now destroyed room looking every inch the enraged hero he was. With what strength I had left I launched myself into his arms and he met me halfway, scooping me up and holding me against his chest tightly while I buried my face in his neck.

He pressed his lips to the top of my head and spoke softly. “Do you need anything at all from here?”

I shook my head, unable to form words. With shaking hands he pulled the belt from around my wrists and threw it. Snatching the thin blanket he wrapped it around my shoulders before standing, holding me up bridal style. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders I leaned into him like I never had another.

I’d needed him and there he was.

He’d *saved* me.

The carnage in the living room was testament to his anger. Both men were laid out in the remains of the broken kitchen table, Danny bleeding from a head wound onto the floor. The door had been kicked in and Josh walked through splinters from the flimsy piece of fake wood he’d demolished like he owned the place. My mother sat wordlessly on the couch, her eyes wide in terror as she watched him stalk across the room and out the door.

I wouldn’t remember being bundled or being carried into the house or being carefully dressed in his clothes.

All the rest I would remember from that night came as Josh tucked me into bed next to him, his arms wound tightly around me as he whispered comforting words. Turning slightly I let my heart take the lead for once in my life.

Pressing my lips to his softly as I touched his face I said the only thing I could think of.

“Thank you.”

Reciprocating my kiss gently he held me tighter still. “S’okay now, Daddy’s got you.”

——

Jey POV

My plan may not have been foolproof but it had worked and Rori would never be going back to that awful place. Each time she woke up crying and screaming for me it wrenched my heart and made me murderous at the same. I hoped I’d done permanent damage and seriously considered going back to make sure the job was done.

While I’d let her go I hadn’t gone far, just pulling off the road about a mile away to mull over my options. Banging on the trailer door within minutes after getting her text her mother had creaked it open and tried to tell me to mind my own business and go away.

So I’d done the logical thing and kicked the damn thing as hard as I could, flimsy wood exploding everywhere on impact. Even as angry as I was I wouldn’t hurt a woman but Rori’s sad excuse for a mother didn’t know that. I’d sent her down to the couch with a relatively soft shove, at least compared to what I did to her man, and fear did the rest.

Paul got a firm right to the jaw before a couple swift kicks to the ribs just to show him how it felt. The other male, whose name I didn’t bother to learn, was dealt a couple body blows and some well aimed shots to the face before I threw him head first through their shitty table. The irony of that was the only part of the whole ordeal that made my mouth twitch to remember.

Just because I only pretended to throw hands on television didn’t mean I couldn’t fuck someone up for real if I decided to.

Aurora stirring in my arms got my attention. At first she burrowed deeper into my side, her cheek pressed into my collarbone. Thankfully it seemed like she was just waking up naturally rather than being scared awake by a nightmare. Ten hours punctuated by several rounds of panic wouldn’t be nearly enough to fully recover but maybe I could get her to eat something or shower before sleep claimed her again. Pressing my lips to her forehead I smiled and tried to be reassuring. “Hey sleepy head.”

She jumped so hard it was like I’d electrocuted her and I immediately felt bad for breaking the spell. Tumbling out of the bed Aurora yelped in pain when she hit the dark wood floor. Not what I had been expecting. Kicking the covers off my own legs I knelt down next to her and touched her leg gently. Her hazel eyes were blown wide and she looked a little dazed.

“Hey, hey you with me baby?”

Her throat moved as she swallowed and it looked uncomfortable. “I- Jesus Christ.” Burying her face in her hands she began to sob. Hard, heaving cries from deep in her chest. Pulling her into my lap I let her cling to me and cry it out. I could only imagine how she must feel.

I wasn’t sure how long we sat there with her fist balled into my shirt and her tears soaking it but my left foot had gone completely numb by the time her sobs quieted into hiccups.

“She sold me.” I hated hearing her normally lyrical accent so hoarse and broken. She’d never cry so hard again, I’d make sure of it.

“I know baby girl.” I was very gentle with where I rubbed her arms and sides, minding as best I could all the places she was bruised.

“Why? I was paying her rent, she could have just asked for more money. I could have got another job. I could have worked nights or-or-“

“Aurora.” She paused and I cupped her chin, gently making her look at me. “There was nothing you coulda done. That’s greed baby, greed and addiction.”

Her eyes welled with fresh tears and she sniffed. “She’s gonna be so mad.”

As realization took hold I could see the panic in her swell. “Oh no. Oh no, oh no, I don’t - I haven’t been able to get a room somewhere yet and she’s not gonna let me come back after that. Not unless…” Her voice dropped off and she shuddered.

I waited another beat to make sure she was done talking. “You don’t need to worry.”

She swiped a hand across her eyes. “What do you mean? I’m - this is so inappropriate Mr. Fatu.”

Barking a laugh I pulled her in and dropped another kiss on her forehead before moving to each of her cheeks and then the tip of her nose. “Since when do you call me that? And I mean I’m gonna take care of you from now on but you better start listenin or I’mma spank that fine ass.”

Not the most ‘appropriate’ thing to say but it had the desired effect and she let out a little laugh in spite of her self. Aurora sobered quickly though, worrying her lip and looking up at me through those long lashes. “I didn’t think you saw me that way.”

I shifted, trying to get some feeling back in my foot. “Yeah.” Now it was my turn to feel a little nervous. “Was I wrong thinking you felt that way?”

Maybe I had been wrong taking that little kiss as confirmation.

But I didn’t need to worry. Aurora shook her head emphatically. “No, I do. I have, since like, I started. It’s just that everything over the last few days barely feels real, ya know?”

That made sense. Trauma, especially something so violent and unexpected could shake your mental state up pretty badly. “Makes sense. But hey, I know what I’m feeling right this minute.”

She leaned back to look at me. “Yeah? Gonna share?”

Having finally regained feeling in my foot, I stood up with her in my arms and she reflexively wrapped her arms around my neck. “Hungry. I want breakfast.”

She laughed and hugged me tightly as I carried her to the kitchen.

——

Chapter 6

Aurora POV

Most of the day passed in a blur, I was so tired and slept a lot but Josh had made sure I got what I needed, only leaving my side when I took a shower.

I scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed until my skin was raw, possessed by an urgent need to purge the feeling of Danny’s hands on my body. Closing my eyes I tried to let the water ease the ache I could feel so deep it was like it was in my bones and focus on the positive.

Focus on Josh.

My heart fluttered when I thought about how it felt to be safe in his embrace and the feel of his lips. I was so used to everything being temporary or untrustworthy it was hard not to feel anxiety about it too. Well, more so that he would come to his senses and send me back there. I tightened my arms around myself when it was like my whole body rebelled at the notion.

I’d sleep in a dumpster before I went back there.

That thought sent off a fresh wave of fears and stresses I just couldn’t deal with in the moment. I found myself wanting nothing more than to curl up into Josh’s arms and beg for it all to go away. As if he could read my thoughts a gentle knocking on the door interrupted the free fall into disassociation.

“You okay?” He sounded worried.

I turned off the water, unaware it had progressively gone cold and stepped out, noticing the time on the wall clock. It was eleven, I’d been in here for almost an hour. My whole body warmed at the thought of his concern, mitigating the chill a little bit. I wasn’t used to someone worrying about me.

“Yeah…I just realized I don’t have any clothes though.” I felt young and stupid and vulnerable. Like a child who had forgotten their away bag for a sleepover and was too scared to tell anyone.

“I got you, so long as you don’t mind wearing my stuff again. We can take care o’the rest tomorrow.”

Wrapping myself in a towel I opened the door enough to receive the bundle of clothes he held. A makeshift tank top of his and pair of basketball shorts. It made me smile to myself to think of him chopping up tshirts various ways before his matches. The shorts were a no go, they wouldn’t stay up unless I had something to secure them. I’d have to settle for the shirt and the only ancient pair of panties I had from…that place. Not home. I’d never think of it as home again.

I loved being enveloped by his smell though, just wearing this made me feel safer and more relaxed. Another idea flitted through the back of my mind. One that would surely help me forget Danny and his slimy hands.

Instead of continuing to try and figure out how to get the shorts to stay up, I folded them up. Hesitantly I stepped into the hallway to find him waiting, scrolling on his phone.

His coffee colored eyes swept over me from head to toe and I couldn’t fight the blush I felt blooming. He straightened and I held out the shorts. “I’m sorry, they won’t stay up.”

Josh didn’t speak right away but licked his lips and blinked before looking from my exposed thighs to the floor as he took the garment back and tossed them unceremoniously. When he did talk it was low and soft. “S’okay. You don need to apologize all the time anymore baby.”

My brain was scrambled but hormones were a hell of a thing. I just wanted a little piece of good amid the crazy. Fuck it, what do I have to lose by teasing him a little? “Or what? You gonna spank me for that too?”

His head snapped up with a surprised expression that shifted quickly into a predatory smirk and my breath caught in my throat. When he stepped into my space, crowding me back against the doorframe I wasn’t even aware of the pain from the bruises but focused solely on him instead. Leaning down so our noses touched he never broke eye contact when he answered in a heated whisper.

“Baby girl, Daddy’s gonna spank you for all sorts of things and you gonna beg for more.” Bringing a hand up he cupped my chin and slid a thumb over my bottom lip, dipping into my mouth just a little. “And more. Once you’re feelin better you’ll be screaming for mercy all night, every night.”

I was pretty sure I was going to faint. Fear and need crashed through me together with an overwhelming intensity, the throb between my legs for him roared to life with a vengeance. All I could muster was a whimper and he chuckled softly.

“Gotta be careful what games you play baby, I always win.”

Now that sparked something defiant in me. An aroused defiance, but defiance all the same. I wanted to show him I could play too, this felt good and it worked towards my plan of making me forget all about yesterday.

I pressed my body into his, my nipples becoming hard and sensitive with the friction from pressing into his chest. My arms encircled his neck and his eyes widened in surprise. A hard lump rose against my belly as I tried to get my hips closer to him somehow, seeking relief for my aching pussy. Josh seemed a little uncertain but his arms came around my middle, melding us together nicely.

I didn’t know the right way to ask for what I wanted so I’d just have to go for it. “I want you.”

Simple and to the point.

He groaned, deep in his chest and started peppering kisses down my jaw and neck before retracing the path with a languid stroke of his tongue. My head spun and my hands clutched at his shoulders. I whimpered when his teeth grazed my neck, it felt so good it chased away the doubts and fears, replacing them with blind want and need. In this moment I’d do anything to be closer still.

Josh pressed a knee between my legs, making my head fall back with a gasp. Memories of my fantasy about riding his thigh caused a fresh rush of heat to my core and I ground against him with a helpless abandon. One of his big hands tunneled into my hair and then his lips were crushing mine, tongue thrusting between my teeth to explore and coax my own into action.

The hand not controlling my head began to slide up my thigh, I could feel his strength as he massaged his way up to my hip. Once there, he dug in hard.

Directly into a bruise.

I cried out against his mouth as my body went rigid in an unexpected flash of pain. He let go instantly with a curse but wrapped his arms around me to comfort me. Gritting my teeth against the hurt I pressed my face into his shirt and gave a frustrated whine. I felt him take a deep breath before he spoke.

“I’m sorry baby.”

Wrapping my own arms around him I gave his middle a squeeze, my voice mumbled against his chest. “Not your fault.”

He sighed and pulled back, looking down at me with a soft smile he ran a hand over my hair in a comforting gesture. “Needed to slow down anyway. You ain’t in the right place right now.”

Disappointment and insecurity flared to life within me. “I want to make my own choice.”

“I know baby girl but I don’t want you to hate me tomorrow. *I* don’t want to hate me tomorrow. And I will if I take advantage of you right now.”

Irrational tears burned my nose. Fear and shame made me think he didn’t actually want me and I tried to push away. “I’m sorry.”

“Where you goin?” He didn’t let me go and I fussed against him.

“I don’t know.” I sniffed, feeling confused and ridiculous. Some part of my brain tried to reason with me but the negative parts were louder. “Being close to you like this makes me feel some type of way. Lemme go.”

He laughed, deep a low and sexy and I hated him a little for how I was feeling. “Now hold on. We can still do somethin about that.”

I stopped wiggling and the half hearted pushing, my attention coming back to the warmth I could feel everywhere we touched. Jeez, trauma really does fuck with your ability to regulate.

“What do you mean?”

Stepping back he ran his hand along my arm until our fingers were interlocked and gave me a soft tug. “I just had to get myself together so I don’t cross that big line too early. But I said I’d take care of you and I meant it, now c’mon.”

I’d follow him anywhere right now even if I didn’t have a full picture of what he had in mind. Letting him lead me felt right and my fears he didn’t actually want me were soothed somewhat.

Once in his bedroom he let me go to strip down to his boxers. Shyly I averted my eyes and he snorted. “Better get used to this.”

He pulled me with him as he climbed into the bed, maneuvering until we were facing each other on our knees. “I want you to show me what you like.”

I blinked, suddenly feeling very silly and uncertain. “Uh, what do you mean?”

Josh’s smile was sexy, his beard felt good against my skin as he kissed the corner of my mouth. “Girl, you are somethin else. Show your Daddy how you like to be touched, show him what gets you off.”

Oh I’d understood him the first time but I wasn’t sure how I felt about showing him. “I-uh—I don’t know, it-I feel stupid.”

“There ain’t nothing stupid ‘bouta woman feeling pleasure Rori. Now, show me or there’ll be consequences.”

That bratty desire to be defiant rose in me again, wanted to test him and see what he meant by consequences. Maybe I’d explore that feeling another time, when I wasn’t so nervous. He seemed determined and I was too turned on to argue. At least I’d get a little relief from the ache between my legs. With a defeated sigh I caved. “Okay.”

Josh looked bemused but satisfied he was getting his way. Avoiding eye contact I grabbed a pillow and closed my eyes as I situated it between my knees, trying to find the right spot to put the most pressure. It was never easy and being watched made it so much worse.

“Rori?”

I froze, shame exploding in my gut. “Y-yeah?”

“Have you ever had sex?” His voice was gentle.

I shook my head no. He nodded.

“Been touched by someone else?”

Again I shook my head no and again he nodded.

“Hell have *you* ever touched yourself?”

Biting my lip I shook my head for a third time. “Well, I’ve tried a couple times but I just get frustrated and stop. This makes me -“ I shook my hands nervously, not wanting to say the words -“ya know, makes me feel good. It’s short but it helps.”

Running a hand over his face Josh took a few deep breaths and gripped his growing erection through the plaid fabric he wore. It was hard not to look down but his obvious size made me nervous.

“Whaddya think about when you do it?”

I shifted, seeking some relief. May as well tell him, I was getting frustrated, my nipples tingling and my pussy aching. I was so turned on I was fighting shivers. “Last time I thought about rubbing myself on your thigh instead of the pillow. You held me and helped me move.”

Josh groaned and bit the knuckle on his middle finger before speaking, his voice raw. “You’re makin the whole waiting a couple days part real hard right now baby.”

My own frustration was peaking, he was torturing me and I think he knew it. I sounded petulant but I didn’t care. “You asked!”

Ever so gently he encircled my neck with a hand, exerting a tiny bit of pressure. I felt my bones melt.

“Mind that attitude baby.” He smirked, watching my reaction with the same expression of a cat who’d caught a canary. “I’m decidin how I’m gonna get you off the first time.”

Before I could respond he was moving, shifting so he was situated behind me and slightly to my right, his chest pressed to my back. One of his calloused hands glided up underneath his shirt to cup my breast, rolling the hard pebble there between his thumb and forefinger. He nipped at my neck, alternating his pressure and soothing the spots where he bit me harder with his tongue.

I thought I might cum just from him playing with my breasts, I could feel every roll and pinch in my pussy. “Oh, oh, feels so good!”

I felt him smile against my neck. “Just wait baby, Daddy’s gonna blow your mind.”

Tauntingly the fingers of his other hand ran across the top of my panties, back and forth a few times before finally dipping below the elastic. I bucked against him involuntarily with a gasp when his finger brushed the top of my soaked slit for the first time. “Josh!”

He flat out growled, his fingers becoming more insistent in their exploration, dipping into my wetness. “Jesus fucking Christ, your body’s just beggin to be fucked huh baby? You want Daddy to fuck you?”

If it weren’t mad with need I’d have been ashamed of the noise I made, somewhere between a keen and a wail. When his fingers started circling my swollen clit, swiping over the sensitive bud with just the right amount of pressure I thought I was going to break apart. “Yes! Yes Daddy please!”

Letting go of my breast he used that hand to guide one of mine into his boxers to circle around his cock. I moaned, even if I couldn’t see him just feeling the thick, veiny staff in my hand was enthralling and so, so hot. Guiding my hand with his own he began making long strokes as he slid his other middle finger inside me. My walls clamped down around the digit, it was slightly uncomfortable but the added sensation of the heel of his hand pressed into my clit over road it with pleasure.

Pressing his lips to my ear he smirked even as he began to pant, his own pleasure building. “Ride my hand baby, ride it til you cum for me.”

It didn’t take a genius to know what he meant by “ride”. Doing what I would have if it were just the pillow I rolled my hips and lights exploded behind my eyes. “Oh my god!”

My whole body shuddered and I felt my control slip away, completely lost to the insane pleasure grinding into his hand brought me. I’d never managed a fraction of how good this felt on my own. Waves began to build within me and suddenly all those romance novels made sense.

“That’s it baby, give it all to me.” His hand sped up and so did I, feeling an explosion building within me.

“I-Josh, oh-I think I’m gonna cum!”

“Hmm, go for it baby girl, lemme see your face while you cum for me.”

I let my head drop back against his shoulder and opened my eyes to watch his face. The pressure in me erupted, sending shock after shock of intense pleasure through me. It felt like my whole body from head to toe was racked with the overwhelming sensation of my orgasm as my walls clamped around his finger over and over again. Relaxation like I’d never felt before washed through me amid the aftershocks and I slumped against him.

Wetness coated my fingers now as he continued to use my hand to jack off. Josh’s own noises were becoming more erratic as his release drew near. I leaned up to kiss him, deciding I’d try talking to him like he did me.

“Cum for me Daddy, I wanna make you feel good too.”

Removing his finger from me he brought it to his mouth and sucked my essence off, his eyes drifting closed as he moaned low and deep and long. After another few strokes his whole body stiffened, his dick pulsing in my hand with his release. I loved the look on his face as he orgasmed, it was so hot I felt a fresh spark of want.

“Shit baby, that was good.” Slowly, reluctantly he got up and padded over to the bathroom. He was completely naked when he came back with a hand towel. “Here sexy, clean up and I’m gonna get some clean boxers.”

Removing my underwear I did as he said, tossing the soaked garment and towel into the hamper as he crawled back into bed with me. Settling into his arms, my ear pressed to his heartbeat, I sighed contentedly, sleep already blurring my vision. “Thank you, this still hardly feels real.”

“You ain’t never gonna have to worry again baby. Now get some sleep.”

The last thing I remembered was him pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

—-

Jey POV

The first thing I became aware of the next morning were the long strands of sweet smelling auburn hair tickling my nose. The second thing I became aware of was her naked bottom pressed firmly against my morning wood, making me grateful I wore boxers to sleep. In a few weeks I’d be able to just roll her over on my stomach and slide into her soft heat, waking her up by fucking her.

Carefully so as not to wake her I shifted out of bed. She gave a slight whimper before burying her face in my pillow and settling back into sleep. Good. She needed it.

I played last night back over in my head as I filled a bottle of water, wrote a quick note that said “gym or kitchen” to leave on the bedside table to she wouldn’t panic about waking up alone and moved on into my morning workout. It felt good to move the weights around and lose myself to the focus it brought. A lot had changed in a short amount of time and it felt good to do something normal and consistent.

It had taken every shred of control I had not to push all the way and just take what I wanted. I’d been lost for a minute when she’d pressed that sweet, curvy little body against me, the want clouding her hazel eyes and her hips grinding deliciously against my leg. I don’t think I would have held back if she hadn’t cried out in pain and she deserved better for her first time than being rutted into against a doorframe. Not to mention I wanted her healthy and clear headed, not bruised and freshly traumatized.

Remembering the way her body had clutched my finger like a fucking fist caused a rush of blood to my cock. It turned a dark part of me on to know I would be the only man to ever have her. Normally I didn’t mess with younger women or virgins, I could be a hothead and made some stupid choices here and there but I really wasn’t interested in breaking some innocent girls heart. Sex was great, tears not so much.

A ding from my phone brought me back to the present and I dropped down from the pull up handles. A message from Jonathan along several others from Sami and Joe and Phil. Only one of them had my son and I didn’t have the wherewithal to chat about much else right now. At least not without spilling the whole ordeal.

“**when’s good? we can bring dinner w/ little man**

I wondered if he’d drop off food and Jason on the porch and drive away. I doubted it but I also felt a twinge of anxiety at the thought of explaining the situation to anyone, let alone my twin. And Trinity.

The longer I waited the worse it would be though.

Taking a deep breath I responded.

**yeah thanks. 7?**

While I waited for him to respond I hopped on the delivery app and ordered a few pairs of underwear and simple blue tank top dress in Medium. I wasn’t an expert on women’s sizes but I figured that was safe. I’d let Rori go shopping for herself when she felt up for it. The thought of spoiling her, of dressing her in nice clothes and other nice things made me grin. I’d never mentioned it but I’d noticed she wore the same few ancient articles all the time.

**bet, c u later**

Wrapping up my workout I moved to the kitchen to make breakfast and debated waking her up. I didn’t have to wonder what to do long when she appeared in the room, making me jump and swear which was followed by her giggling.

“Gonna get you a damn bell.” I went to her and pulled her close as a blush stole across her cheeks. “How’d you sleep baby?”

“Not bad. Was pretty tired after last night.” Her fingers were drawing shapes on my chest, causing a tingling feeling to spread into my lower body.

I laughed and stroked her hair. “Did you like that?”

Aurora nodded shyly and ducked her head to avoid eye contact.

Dropping my head to kiss the shell of her ear I smiled when I felt her shiver. “You want Daddy to touch you some more baby?”

Embarrassed she pressed her face into my chest and nodded again.

“Nah girl, you gotta look at me when you ask me to make you cum.”

Biting her lip she looked up at me through those lashes, the same look that had me thinking about her on her knees, and whispered.

“Please?”

Hauling her over my shoulder made her shriek but the laughter it dissolved into told me she wasn’t upset. Breakfast forgotten I headed for the bathroom, an entirely different meal now on my mind. Swatting her ass lightly made her squirm and whimper deliciously. I couldn’t wait to hear the noises she’d make with my tongue buried in her while orgasm after orgasm tore through her.

“What’re you doing?”

“You’ll see baby.” I liked the sound of her laugh so I tickled her bare thighs making her wiggle even more. She gasped then froze when we got to the master bath and I sat her on the cool marble counter.

“Uh, Josh?” Aurora sounded uncertain.

“Hmm? You gonna get nervous now?” I cranked in the water and turned to her.

She crossed her arms over her chest defensively. “No…”

I smiled and held the sides of her face, guiding her in for a deep kiss. Coaxing her with my tongue I felt her relax and return the kiss, gently pressing back against my invasion as she slid her hands up my chest to my shoulders. Waiting was going to be so hard. Breaking away I grinned down at her.

“We don have to do anythin you ain’t ready for. All you ever gotta do is say ‘stop it’ and I promise I will.”

Aurora sighed and I could feel the relief roll over her shoulders. “Thank you. I want you so much I can’t think one minute and then the next I’m really nervous and then I’m sad.”

It made sense, she had been through so much. “Well where you at right now?”

Glancing at the shower before looking back at me she answered in a shy whisper. “Can’t think.”

I ran my hands up her thighs until my thumbs rested against her lips there, hovering just outside her slit. She trembled and whined. “You wet for me?”

She nodded and I took my hands away to pull the shirt off, leaving her completely exposed before stripping down myself. I liked the little gasp she gave before averting her eyes again. Mindful of our states I wrapped her legs around my waist and carried her to the shower. The hot water was incredible but didn’t come close to the feeling of her nakedness pressed against me. All I would have to do is pin her to the wall and thrust.

I set her down under the spray but pressed her to the cold wall with a kiss, trailing down her neck to her shoulder. Her hands slid up and down my wet biceps, squeezing and clawing. Closing my mouth around one of her brown nipples she cried out when I sucked, rolling my tongue over the sensitive bud.

“Josh! Oh!” Girl had some sensitive nipples. Good, I couldn’t wait to torture them and try to make her cum that way. But another time, right now I had something else planned.

Careful to as not to slip on the slick floor I got to my knees in front of her while kissing my way down her belly. I loved the way her whole body twitched when I gently bit her inner thighs.

“Put your legs on my shoulders baby.” I kissed her lower belly one more time before lifting her bottom. She did as instructed but she looked off balance as her hands fought for purchase on the stone wall. “And your hands in my hair.”

“What’re you gonna-oh god!” Aurora’s hands tunneled into my hair as I slid my tongue along her wet seam. She tasted so good it made me moan and I continued lapping at her.

Nails dug into my scalp as I picked up the pace, alternating between circling her clit and plunging deep into her pussy, thighs quivered and tightened around my ears and her heels dug into my back. She moaned and cried out, my name tumbling off her lips over and over again. But I wanted something else.

Carefully I shifted most of her weight to my shoulders in order to free up a hand. She whined when I pulled back a bit but kept teasing her opening with a finger. “Wanna hear you call me Daddy baby girl. I want you to beg Daddy to let you cum.”

When our eyes met I was rewarded with a gorgeous sight, her lips parted ever so slightly as she breathed, eyes half lidded and cheeks bright. She was completely mine to do with whatever I wanted in that moment and the power of her trust was better than any drink.

“P-please Daddy, please let me cum for you.” Her lack of control was evident in the tremble of her voice. I wouldn’t make her suffer too long. We could play those games another time.

Pressing my face back to her pussy I slid my middle finger into her slowly while sucking on that delicate bundle of nerves. Her head fell back and she arched into me with a wail as her walls spasmed around my finger. I kept going, kept feasting at her through the waves of her first orgasm and into the next as she began to twist and buck, now crying out for mercy.

“Too much! Too much! JOSH!” As her second release peaked her voice cracked with a scream I’d never forget. I slowed down but kept licking until she began tapping out on my arm and pleading with me to stop.

As promised I let her go and she melted into my arms, we sat that way for a few moments while she caught her breath. After a few minutes I nudged her chin so she’d look up at me. “You good?”

“I didn’t know my body could do that twice in a row.” The shock in her voice was a nice stroke to my ego. I prided myself on being a giving partner, I loved a woman’s face lost in pleasure.

“That’s just a taste too baby girl. I bet we can get more than that outta ya.”

Her grin took on a mischievous quirk. “What about you? Can I do that?” Inquisitive fingers encircled my cock and I grunted. Righting myself I put a hand on her shoulder indicating she stay down on her knees.

And there it was, that look where she bit her lip and looked up at me, only this time droplets of water caught in her long lashes giving her an unearthly beauty. Copying my earlier motions she ran her hands up my thighs before finally touching me again, carefully stroking my length. Gently grabbing a fistful of her hair I guided her until the tip was pressed to her lips.

“Breathe through your nose and take your time. So long as you don’t bite me I’ll prolly like whatever you do.”

I knew exactly what I liked in a blow job but this wasn’t the time for that kind of roughness. Instead I wanted to let her explore and take it at her own pace for now, until she was more comfortable. Then I’d worry about getting all the way down her throat.

It was impossible to contain my hiss when her tongue flicked out over the tip, she gave a few more licks before taking the tip fully into her mouth for few sucks. The sight of her like this was so hot, I never wanted to forget. Carefully, she inched a little farther, taking an another inch or so. She still had a long way to go and it was hard fighting the urge to thrust forward.

“Gimme your hand baby.”

She did as instructed without stopping the back and forth motion she’d started on those first few inches. Taking her fist I wrapped it around the base and showed her how to move her hand in time with her mouth. Wet and sloppy with her saliva her hand glided up and down smoothly, pretty soon I was the one twitching with my head thrown back.

Taking a little more Aurora moaned around me before taking so much she finally gagged. Knowing it was getting her turned on too and that she wanted more was just about enough to send me over. I stopped her by pulling her head back. “Lemme cum on that pretty face baby.”

She nodded and using her hand it only took a few more seconds of stroking before I painted her face and hair and chest with a deeply satisfied groan. Watching her pink tongue swipe my essence off her lips was almost enough to get me hard again even so soon.

“Did I do okay?” I loved the shy but hopeful expression as I pulled her to her feet to rinse us both off.

“Nah baby, you did great.” I kissed the top of her head, turning off the water and stepping out, pulling her along.

My phone buzzed letting me know her clothes were here. Good, I needed to tell her about Jon and Trinity coming for dinner anyway.

Aurora smiled at me and went about drying off, sneaking looks over as we exited the room.

“I ordered you some clothes and they’re here, I’mma get dressed and go grab em. Need to talk over some food so meet me in the kitchen?”

With a nod she danced off to the kitchen in her towel and I smiled after her. Now I just had to get over the hurdle of explaining this to my brother and his wife without sounding like a total head case.

Chapter 7

Aurora POV

“Josh…”

“We don *have* to say anything specific. These things, it’s just gonna be hard to keep it from Jon anyway. Can’t ever hide shit from each other.”

I nodded but it didn’t make me feel any better. It was easy to accept that he had strong bonds to his family, I just didn’t know how that felt. Everything still felt new and raw, I wasn’t even a whole 72 hours into this relationship before he’s talking about letting people know. It felt rushed and I couldn’t tell if I would feel that way normally or just because of the situation.

“Okay.” His eyes narrowed, my tone must not have been very convincing.

“Bullshit. You better learn t’speak up for yourself ‘round here.”

Crossing my arms I tried to force the words out of my throat. It wasn’t easy, I’d never been asked directly how I felt about things. Not unless I was going to be punished for those feelings.

“Promise you won’t be angry?”

Understanding dawned in his eyes and his whole face softened. Gently he tucked a loose strand of my crazy hair behind an ear. “Promise.”

“It feels rushed. This-us-I don’t even know what we are. I don’t know what’s safe to assume or not. I’m nervous. What if they don’t like me? Or thin-mmph!”

Josh cut me off by pressing his lips to mine with a grin. His hands ran gently over my arms and back up to stop at my shoulders with a comforting pressure. “Relax baby girl. You and Trinity are gonna make a great team and Jon’s gon love you just because. It’s me they’re gonna be mad at.”

That didn’t make sense. Why would they be mad at him when he’d saved me? “Why?”

With a groan he swiped a hand over his face. “Cuz anyone with sense would assume I’m completely takin advantage of you. Hell I am. Never shoulda touched you.”

Tears built in my eyes as fear rippled through me again when his face became clouded with guilt. What if he decided he didn’t really want me or this was all too wrong? I didn’t want that. My heart hurt at the thought of not feeling him close anymore.

“But-but-“

“Shhh, baby.” His calloused hands cupped my face and his thumbs ran along my jaw. “Doesn’t mean I plan t’stop.”

My emotions were a roller coaster and I really didn’t appreciate him sending me for another loop. I reared back and punched him in the shoulder, not hard enough apparently, but he was right again about winning games. He acted as if I’d dislocated it, making a dramatic noise and falling to his knees in front of me, effective in making me laugh as he’d planned.

When he started running his hands up and down my thighs while kissing my stomach through the soft cotton dress he’d presented me earlier my laughter dissolved into soft sighs. I gripped the counter and tried to grit my teeth in an effort to hold onto my frustration.

“Not fair.”

He was pushing the knee length hem up past my waist with one hand while the other ran two fingers over my clothed slit. Even through the underwear the sensation made me twitch, my hips seeking more. As much as my body wanted it I needed to think, to get ready. I pushed him away

“Stop it.”

The twist of his lips was contrite but he stood and guided me to the table. “Here, sit and I’ll make us somethin to eat.”

“What do we tell them?” Fidgeting I realized for the first time since texting Josh I didn’t have my phone. “Dammit.”

“Hmm?” He raised an eyebrow at me.

“My phone. Oh man, my laptop. How am I gonna get schoolwork done?” All the overwhelming feelings that felt like they were hovering just behind a dam threatened to spill over. Panic tightened my chest and made my head swim, I dropped it into my hands, grinding the heels of my palms into my eyes. Josh was by my side right away, murmuring soft, comforting words in my ear while he petted my hair.

“Hey, hey, you gotta breathe Aurora. We’re gonna take care of all that, I was just waiting for you to feel better before I brought it up. Get you a new phone, new computer, new clothes, all of it, whatever you need.”

Instead of stopping my tears his words broke the dam and I started crying again, this time in a weird mix of sadness, stress, gratitude and love. It was hard to believe he cared so much but I had no choice but to trust him. Not something I was inherently unhappy about but also not something I was used to. Everyone in my life had let me down so far. Would Josh really be different?

“Let it out baby.” He cradled me against his shoulder and let me sob. Faster than before I felt the immense waves of emotions subsiding and my cries faded only for my stomach to growl loudly.

Josh laughed, rubbing my neck and kissing my forehead as he stood and went about fixing sandwiches.

“Thanks.”

“You don’t have to thank me but you’re welcome. As for your first question, we’re gonna tell ‘em the truth. I don’t like lying to Jon an there’s no point. Now, what we tell everyone else may be different. But don’t worry bout that tonight.”

I was struggling with the thought of talking to his closest relative, I couldn’t conceive the thought of more people right now. Taking a bite of my meal I nodded, using the time I needed to chew to think over what I wanted to say.

“I don’t really understand your need to tell him but I can be okay with it. But can we keep it at them for now please?”

“Course baby.”

“I really miss Jason, can’t wait to hug him.” The little boys love would be a much needed balm right now.

“Me too.”

It felt good to be listened to even if I didn’t understand how I was feeling. I just have zoned out because Josh laid a hand over one of my and called my name quietly.

“You with me Rori?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you really wanna be together? We don’t-“ he paused and worked his jaw for a second “-don’t have to be together ya know. I’ll make sure you’re okay and I’m gonna keep paying you for taking care of Jason. If you know, you wanna leave at some point.” He was squeezing my hand now, almost to the point of pain.

I loved his touch. Raising my gaze from where our hands rested on the table to his dark eyes I swallowed and tried to make sure whatever I said next captured what I wanted to say. ‘Yeah, duh’ didn’t seem right.

“You asked me earlier and my answer is the same. No body else I’ve met has made me feel like this.” I paused and tilted my head in thought. “I like our lives together so far. I don’t wanna go anywhere. Just scared. Like it’s too good to be true.”

He nodded. “You been through a lot, hell I don’t hardly know what all, but we can make something outta this, something real good. Just gotta do the work.”

“No you sound like the school counselor.” I felt my lips quirk into a grin when he made a face.

“Ugh don’t remind me how young you are. And I sound like that cuz I went to therapy. You’re gonna go too.” Now that surprised me.

“You go to therapy?”

“Yeah. Ever since little man was born. Can’t be mad all the time with a kid around, ya know?” He tilted his head and smiled with a shrug.

“Yeah. I don’t even know my dad’s name.” I laughed when he winced. “It’s okay. I’ve have a long time to make peace with it.”

“Still. I know it’ll take some time but I want you to trust I’m not gonna go anywhere or hurt you or throw you out.” I don’t know how he read my mind so well but I appreciated hearing it all.

“Now c’mere.” Pulling me into his lap Josh buried his face in my neck, nipping and kissing and licking softly while he massaged my thigh. Smacking his shoulder I shrieked a laugh.

“You’re the worst!”

“Oh you have no idea.” And with that he slid a hand up my dress again, pressing that most sensitive spot while his lips worked their way to my ear. “Don’t want you thinkin of sad stuff. Want you all hot and bothered and moaning.”

He got his wish as he worked me with his hand until I was clutching his shoulders and making a mess in his lap. Laying against his chest as the aftershocks receded I closed my eyes and let the remaining exhaustion steal me under again. My last coherent thoughts were on his voice murming to me softly.

“I got you baby, Daddy’s gonna keep you safe, I promise. You’re home with me now.” I thought I dreamed the last part but I would have sworn he said, “I love you.”

—-

Jey POV

Carrying the small woman in my arms was becoming a habit I didn’t want to get rid of. I loved how she melded into me as if she was fucking custom fitted. Loved how easily she let me maneuver her and the warmth of her curves. Loved her laugh and her accent and the way she moved.

I loved Aurora Begay.

Goddamit.

It wasn’t easy to come to terms with the fact that I was, indeed, taking advantage of her situation. It was impossible not to be touching her all the time, like I needed to make sure she was really here, really okay and really wanted me back. I wanted her to forget the bad she’d been through but was also painfully aware that isn’t how it works.

Settling her sleeping form on the sofa I went to work on the house. There wasn’t much to do without little man leaving a trail of crumbs and toys behind him. Something a dog would be good for helping clean up. An idea occurred to me. Maybe Aurora would like a companion? Jason would lose it for a dog.

I decided we were going to the local shelter if that’s what Rori ended up wanting. Running the easy mop over the floor I looked over at her on the couch. I’d do just about whatever she wanted to make her happy, something I had a feeling fancy things wouldn’t accomplish but another being to love and be loved by would.

Jason. I was thankful they already got on so well and that he was so young. At three there wouldn’t be much of a difference in his perception of the situation. If anything, having ‘his Rori’ around more often and closer would be a good thing in his mind. Once I was satisfied with the state of the downstairs I settled in next to her and checked the time. Almost 7, my brother would be rolling up any minute.

Reaching over I nudged her shoulder. “Hey baby, wake up.”

“Hmm?” She stretched and looked disoriented upon opening her eyes at first but smiled when they landed on me. Again I tugged her close to me, enjoying the smell of her hair and the way she giggled when my beard tickled her neck.

“They gon be here soon. You feel ready? Need to do anything?”

No sooner than she shook her heard no the doorbell rang. I could see the anxiety flicker in the way her brows drew together and her lips tightened. Kissing her forehead I went to let them in.

“It’ll be okay, I promise.”

My brother and his family tumbled in like usual, talking and laughing about something or other while handing a waving Jason over to me for a hug. Trinity noticed Aurora standing in the living room first and turned to me with a confused expression. She nudged Jonathan and he did the same, before Jason finally noticed her from my arms. His scream of joy was piercing.

“MY RORI HERE!”

Rushing to him with a huge smile I was happy to see she wasn’t shy about showing her love for him. Her whole face was heart stopping as she swept him away from me and his chubby arms locked her neck in a vice.

“Sure am little dude!”

“Let’s move this to the dining room.” Neither Jon nor Trinity were satisfied but did what I asked. “Aurora? Can you start setting up while I get drinks baby?”

I made sure to add that to the end and avoided meeting their gazes. They’d have it explained soon enough.

Of course my twin followed me through the swinging door into the kitchen, putting a hand against the refrigerator door so I couldn’t open it before he finally spoke. “Excuse me.”

I sighed. “Yeah?”

“The fuck you calling Jason’s nanny “baby” for? Why is she here Joshua?”

I knew he’d be mad but using my whole first name let me know we were starting off at a solid 7.5 on the Richter scale.

“I’ll explain everything after dinner and the kids are occupied k?”

He pushed away with a huff, his anger palpable but helped me gather beers and cups of water. When we got back to the dining room Aurora and Trinity had all three kids settled in their seats as they portioned out food, making small talk about the kids. I was relieved they seemed to have slipped into conversation on their own. Dinner was nice but quick as they caught Aurora and I up in what everyone had done that weekend. It was obvious they were rushing and I couldn’t blame them, I may or may not have dropped the “baby” just to aggravate the situation but also to give them a heads up in a weird way.

#wwe fluff #wwe #the bloodline #fanfiction #jey uso #writing #ao3 writer #jey uso fanfiction #wwe raw #wwe rants #jey uso smut #jey uso x oc #jey uso x fem reader #the usos #smutty fanfiction #smut

69 notes · View notes