#he ruined her life but she ruined his life back. true tragic romance! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

gladerwolfstarkimagines · 3 years ago

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Imagine the Ember Island Players creating a romance between you and Zuko which hits a little too close to home

You sat beside Katara and noticed how Zuko sat on the other side of her. Aang faltered, obviously wanting to sit there and you smirked as Zuko obliviously missed Aang’s look. Zuko had been with the group a few weeks now but his social skills still weren’t very good and you found it made for some very interesting interactions. His attempt at telling jokes alone made you smile every time you saw him for a full week afterwards and you found Zuko did a lot of things that amused you but apparently not so much the others. “I was going to sit there” Aang whined and Zuko shrugged “so? Just sit next to me”. Aang pouted and you laughed to yourself “here” you said standing up ��take my seat Aang” and you moved so he could sit beside Katara. Katara was oblivious and you sat on the other side of Zuko chuckling at Aang’s blush. “What was that all about?” Zuko asked and you smiled “ow nothing you just almost ruined Aang’s evening”. Zuko frowned and went to ask what you meant when the lights dimmed so you knocked his arm shaking your head “i’ll tell you later now shhh”. Zuko folded his arm huffily but stopped talking. The play was wonderfully awful. As you hadn’t joined the gang straight away you knew you had time to just enjoy the first few acts and make fun of the way they portrayed all your friends. Plus what could they do to your character? You didn’t have any old flames like Katara or Sokka and you didn’t have an emotional backstory like Zuko or Aang. So you relaxed arms spread over the back of the bench and waited for *yourself* to make an appearance.

The second your actress walked on stage you knew it wouldn’t be good. They had your character all wrong! Your actress flirted with everyone and acted like a lovesick idiot. You didn’t think it could get much worse and then your character met Zuko’s.

“I’ll save you from the pirates” Zuko’s character purred to yours and you spluttered. “That...that wasn’t even me! That was Katara!” you whispered angrily. You looked to Zuko for confirmation who nodded “yeah I didn’t say that to you...and I certainly didn’t tie you up while staring at you like that”. “And I did not flirt with you like that either”. You both glared as your characters bonded and they actually invented Zuko letting you go voluntarily. As Zuko’s character stared off into the distance and said your name you heard Sokka and Suki wheezing from laughter while you simmered with anger and embarrassment. “I didn’t do that!” Zuko cried and you saw he was blushing vividly. That made you blush too and crossed your arms tightly “they better not stick with this theme”.

Of course they did. By the time act 3 had ended you and Zuko were living a star crossed lovers lifestyle in Ba Sing Sei. They again got you mixed up with Katara and said Azula kidnapped you to lure Zuko to the Earth King’s palace. The act ended with Zuko charging in to save you, offering his own life in exchange for yours, but Azula outmanoeuvred him and arrested him too. As the lights went up for intermission you and Zuko paused before exploding.

“That never even happened!”.

“I knew he was in Ba Sing Sei but we never went on a date”.

“Yeah that was a different girl”.

“And you did not fight with Jet over me”.

“I didn’t even know you knew Jet!” Zuko agreed and you both paused for air.

The gang all looked at each other before bursting into laughter. “What is so funny?” you cried and Sokka smiled. “We all know none of that stuff happened, we were there too remember?”. “Yeah so...can’t we rant?” you asked. “Well yeah but why get so mad about it? Are you trying to convince us or yourselves that the idea the two you flirted is so impossible?”. You and Zuko exploded again at the thought and Sokka and the others burst into laughter again. “All i’m saying is this is a lot of emotion to come from nowhere” Sokka smiled “now i’m going backstage so yell at each other or something” and he disappeared with Suki. Katara and Toph left for snacks and Aang went to the toilet leaving the two of you alone. “But i mean it is ridiculous” you muttered and Zuko nodded “utterly ridiculous”. “Sure we ended up together a few times” you shrugged “but that was completely by chance, it wasn’t like you were hyper-aware of me or vice versa”. “Yeah not at all” Zuko agreed but he wasn’t looking you in the eye for some reason. You stared at him confused and noticed his neck looked slightly red as if he was blushing. “Wait did you?” you asked suddenly “notice me more?”. Zuko looked up and he was indeed blushing deeply “what I....of course not! I never...I mean I did learn your name before anyone else’s but that’s because we spent that time together when I helped the pirates kidnap you and you wouldn’t shut up the whole night”. “Then why are you blushing so much?” you asked and Zuko shrugged “I don’t know I...it’s just them insinuating I like you. I’ve had it a lot”. “You have?” you asked amazed and Zuko nodded “when my uncle heard you’d seen me in Ba Sing Sei and that we’d reached a deal not to tell on one another he had this annoying smirk like i’d done it for any other reason besides the fact it was mutually beneficial. Then when I went back home Azula made it seem like me and you had a thing and Mai got jealous and started asking about you and I had to explain all our interactions and it was very awkward...she wanted me to reassure her by putting you down and making the idea seem impossible but I must have failed because she didn’t believe me. So I guess that’s why it makes me feel weird, everyone keeps telling me I act differently with you and I suppose I do but I have no idea if that’s because everyone keeps saying it or if I always have”. You nodded your head but were unsure what to say. “Well which one do you think it is?” you asked eventually and Zuko paused “what?”. “If you had to guess, would you say you act differently around me because of what people say about us or have you just always acted that way”. Zuko thought, staring at the ground and basically anywhere but at you, “i’m not sure but I guess maybe the second? They must have got it from somewhere I suppose”. “The second?” you asked surprised and Zuko’s blush returned vividly “I’m only guessing, I honestly don’t know”. You nodded your head and went to speak when the others returned which stopped you right in your tracks.

The second half of the play began of course with you and Zuko reuniting in the prison under Ba Sing Sei. You and Zuko did end up there together but you definitely did less staring at one another. You rolled your eyes as your characters began to passionately speak to one another stepping closer and closer. They finally reached one another and you laughed when your character began yelling at Zuko’s. “Ha maybe they got some things right!” you whispered to Zuko who nodded “you did yell at me a lot”. You smirked and went to apologise when Zuko’s character kissed yours. You and Zuko abruptly shot away from each other. “That is not even close to what happened!” you cried at the others who were all laughing. Zuko nodded “this is just slander! They didn’t even bother to try to get our characters right and anyone with half a brain would realise that!”. Someone shushed Zuko and he glared “shush yourself” he cried before storming from the room. He didn’t return for the rest of the play and honestly you thought that was probably wise. It got worse and worse. They still kept in Zuko’s betrayal of Iroh but changed it making you at the centre of Zuko’s struggle. He chose the crown and they made you react dramatically (even getting a love ballad moment). They then skipped forwards to Zuko at the palace, who got his own song when he realised he’d made the wrong choice. Your characters reunited not long after and promptly confessed their love for one another. Then you were both murdered by Ozai very much in line with the tragic forbidden lovers style.

“I mean I’m just glad she’s dead” you shrugged on your way out “anything to end that romance”. The others smirked when Aang paused “do you think Zuko went back home to the villa?” looking around for the angry fire prince. “No he knows we don’t know this place well, he’s probably just sat outside somewhere” you replied looking around but you couldn’t see him brooding anywhere either. When you walked out the front door and still didn’t spot him Aang frowned “okay everyone split up and look for him, meet back here in five minutes”.

You returned five minutes later to see Katara, Suki, Sokka and Toph all hadn’t found him either. “I wonder where he is” Katara frowned and you shrugged “he’ll be fine, that boy has nine lives”. “He didn’t in that play” Toph commented and you nodded. “True but that play was a mess and there’s one thing I still can’t get over. Zuko said his family and friends thought he liked me that’s where his side of this rumour started but in the play they acted like I encouraged him! Where on earth did they get that idea?”. The group all went quiet and you paused “what?”. “Well...I mean you kinda do encourage him” Sokka frowned and your jaw dropped “I DO NOT! When have I ever...”. “When we got kidnapped by the pirates you teased Zuko constantly and refused to be quiet until he spoke to you” Katara pointed out. “Yes but that was to annoy him not flirt with him!”. “Okay how about when June asked if you were his girlfriend and you replied he wishes instead of no?”. “I was joking” you shrugged and Toph smirked “or how about when I was sneaking out to see Zuko at the Western Air Temple and found you already on your way to see him? What were you popping in to see Zuko for huh y/n? Nice date by the campfire?”. “I was doing the same thing as you! I was going to see if he would tell the truth and given that I knew him best I thought I....”. The gang all erupted and you paused “what?”. “You know him best?” Sokka asked smirking and you nodded “that doesn’t mean anything it’s a fact”. “Ow is it?” Sokka asked and you nodded “It is! Fine if I don’t know him best what was his fake name in Ba Sing Sei?”. Everyone went quiet and you nodded “or how about how long ago he was banished from the fire nation? Better yet just tell me his parent’s names!” you cried. When nobody replied you smirked folding your arms victoriously “told you I know him best”. “Yeah you’ve definitely proved how much you know about Zuko” Suki smirked looking past you. You frowned before you heard someone behind you. You turned to see Aang had found Zuko and by the look on his face he’d heard everything. You blushed and looked down “Zuko we were...”. “Having a competition to see who knows me best?” Zuko asked mildly amused and you paused “well sort of...Sokka started it”. “No I didn’t” Sokka retorted “you declared you knew Zuko the best and when I asked if you were sure you started spouting your favourite facts about him”. “They’re not my favourite facts about him” you snapped and Sokka’s smirk just grew “whatever y/n” and he turned leading the way home. The others all followed and purposefully made it so you and Zuko were at the back. “Why were you talking about me anyway?” Zuko asked and you paused “ow nothing I was just er...trying to work out why the Ember Island Players thought I had a thing for you but the gang was not helpful”. “They couldn’t think of a reason?” Zuko asked innocently and you frowned “no they could actually think of lots of reasons, it appears similar to your family they were also under the impression I held a flame for you as it were”. “Ow really?” Zuko asked. He kept his voice flat but you could swear he was smirking slightly. “Stop enjoying this” you whined pushing him “it’s not funny, it’s embarrassing”. “Liking me is embarrassing?” Zuko asked and you paused “no I didn’t mean that, I just meant having all your friends claim you like someone when you can’t see it”. “You really can’t see where they’re coming from?” Zuko asked and you shook your head “nope not at all”. Zuko looked away and you frowned “I saw that, what did that look mean?”. “Nothing...” Zuko trailed off but you sighed grabbing him by the arm to make him look at you “I’m sick of everyone saying things about me for once just say it to my face!”. Zuko sighed “fine, I just think i’ve been honest with you but you’re not being honest with yourself”. “Not being honest?”. Zuko nodded “Yes, I admitted I could see where my family were coming from and how the rumours started but you’re acting as if they plucked them out of thin air!”. “Well maybe they did! I don’t see how any of our interactions could be interpreted as romantic”. Zuko didn’t look convinced. “You don’t think there’s some truth to what the Ember Island Players said? That maybe there is something here?” Zuko asked gesturing to the small gap between you. “No of course not! Do you?”. “No” Zuko yelled back and you nodded “fine! You are the most infuriating...” you started when Zuko grabbed you kissing you. You initially tensed at the sensation but soon melted into it. Zuko seemed to be trying to prove a point by kissing you passionately and not wanting him to win you kissed him back matching his intensity. Finally Zuko pulled away for air and stared at you “still not want to admit there’s something here?”. You stared at Zuko torn between admitting he was right and your pride. You were annoyed, frustrated, excited and exhilarated all at once. You were breathing rapidly, your cheeks bright red as were Zuko’s and neither of you made to move away. “I...” you started eventually “that was a good kiss”. Zuko nodded, his frustration melting away “it was, I enjoyed it...I’ve been wondering what it would feel like to kiss you for a while now”. “You have?” you asked and Zuko nodded “as annoying as it is to admit my family and friends were right, I like you and I have for a while”. You smiled despite yourself at how adorable Zuko looked all bashful and embarrassed. “I tried ignoring it for a while but then when I joined the group your friends all saw it straight away. Then tonight...the play was bad but I was frustrated that everyone seemed to see it apart from you the person I actually wanted to see it...you”. You looked down wondering how to reply “I’m sorry I bet that was really frustrating”. Zuko nodded “It was and I figured this was just one-sided but that...did you feel it too?”. Zuko looked so unsure and unlike himself it was endearing and gave you confidence. “Yes” you said shakily “after that kiss I can tell you it is definitely not one-sided. I like you too Zuko and probably have since the start”. “Probably?” Zuko asked and you sighed “I’m not good with my emotions, I can be oblivious to them so I can’t with certainty tell you it’s been going on as long as the play made it out to be but I know I like you. Right now in this moment...I hope that’s enough, I know it’s a shit confession and you probably wanted something more solid but I...”. Zuko began laughing and you paused “what’s so funny?”. “Something more solid? Y/n I’m on the run from the Firelord who is my father, my sister is hunting me to kill me and I could very likely be imprisoned for the rest of my life if Aang fails and that’s if i’m lucky...I’m not even sure if I have a future so trust me all I need is the present. To know in this moment right here you like me back” Zuko blushed but he stepped closer and took your hands “that’s more than enough for me”. “It is?” you asked and Zuko nodded “yes and if by some chance it becomes more long-term I’ll be very happy but for now I just want to enjoy this time with you”. You smiled and leant in to kiss Zuko again when someone coughed. “Hey what are you two doing?” Sokka called. Apparently the others had finally realised the two of you were no longer with the group and walked back to find the two of you as you currently were. Luckily it was dark so you moved away from Zuko but still held his hand. “Yeah we thought you’d gotten lost are you okay?” Katara called. Zuko sighed and you smirked at his expression. “We’re fine” you smiled “we were just talking and Zuko’s going to show me this beach he went to a lot as a kid”. Zuko’s eyes shot up to yours and he smiled. “You are?” Aang asked and Zuko nodded “yep, it’s not far from here so we won’t be long. You guys head back to the villa and we’ll meet you there” and with that Zuko tugged you away from the others. You smiled at Zuko and he smiled back at you “quick thinking, I didn’t think we’d get out of there so easily”. “You can thank me later” you replied when you heard Sokka gasp “wait are they holding hands? Y/n are you holding hands?”. “Run!” Zuko cried and you laughed but did as he said. You kept running even after Sokka’s voice trailed off and only stopped when you reached a sandy beach. You both collapsed on the ground and you turned to look at Zuko “did you know this was here or did you get lucky?”. “Totally the former” he smiled and you shook your head “you’re lucky I like you”. “I really am” Zuko agreed and he stared at your face tenderly. His fingers brushed your cheek and you smiled “what are you waiting for?”. “I have no idea” Zuko admitted and he leant in to reclaim the lost kiss from earlier. This time you weren’t interrupted.

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saintobio · 3 years ago

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sincerely not. (14)

↳ gojou satoru/reader

with an arranged marriage set in place, the sacred bond is doomed with a wife who wants to make the relationship work and a husband who’s ready to ruin it all. unbeknown to him, a tragic fate already lies within the pages of his romance book.

genre. heavy angst, unrequited love, arranged marriage, modern au, 18+

tags/warnings. mentions of death, mentions of violence and physical abuse

notes. 10.4k wc. i’d like to take this opportunity to announce that i will be going on a week-long hiatus to refresh bc i’m currently experiencing burnout. the next chapter will come to you guys on the 20th of august. for now, please enjoy this chapter. i might do character interviews soon. tysm for the beta @suhkusa <3

series masterlist -> episode fifteen

For the next twenty-four hours, you never got any proper sleep.

The entire Gojou family was heavily in bereft following the demise of their loved one whose unexpected death caused complications in their household. Satoru himself could not sleep even though you ended up going back to the penthouse to keep him company in his loneliest time. Nana’s death had his mind running on an endless treadmill, exhausting him for the whole night until he was mentally, emotionally, and physically drained. Just last night, you heard him silently crying as he forced himself to sleep, and your heart broke at how he tried to apologize for not being a ‘true man’ after allowing himself to be even more vulnerable than you.

Why would he have to apologize? Grieving, regardless of the gender, made him human so he didn’t have to feel sorry for showing the weaker side of him. He wasn’t a robot nor was he an emotionless being. He could experience every type of pain that a person may go through and you knew by experience that losing a family member could make someone feel hollow inside. You could understand that Satoru was receiving the magnitude of Nana’s death a lot heavier than the rest of his family because they were putting the blame on him for being the cause of her heart attack.

But essentially, this all boiled down to you. Had you not selfishly announced a divorce that night, none of this would have happened and you could have spared Nana from an imminent death. This was the reason why you had been weeping on your own, too. You kept thinking about how different things would have turned out if you simply communicated with your husband prior to deciding on a divorce on your own. Perhaps, even if you still ended up wanting to separate yourself from him, it could have been done on a good note.

This whole tragic outcome was simply meant to show you that you could never have the upper hand. Your marriage was doomed from the beginning and it was inescapable for the most part, unless you would rather sacrifice the effect it would have on your families, just like what happened to Nana—the very woman that your husband treated like his second mother.

Satoru needed people in his life and your topmost priority as of right now was to stay beside him along with your mother-in-law whose sudden presence added to the comfort that her son desperately yearned for. Back at the hospital, Nana’s caregiver revealed that her death didn’t appear to be due to a heart attack because her eyes were bloodshot and her mouth was parted open when she first saw the old woman in her bed—that was, until Eula ordered them to close Nana’s lids and force her jaw back in. Harsh, but this led to speculations of Satoru’s stepmom being the cause of Nana’s untimely death. Was she the one who had said something to Nana that resulted in her ‘heart attack’? Or could she have done something more to take her life by imbruing her own hands?

Your husband was already too engulfed by his heavy downpour of emotions that he no longer had the energy to go on a rampage about it. He had suspicions about Eula just as you and your mother-in-law did after hearing about the caregiver’s narrative, but Satoru had chosen to remain reticent until the clinical autopsy report came out.

The result? It was a myocardial infarction, exactly like what his stepmom claimed.

“Don’t you think we could have requested a second opinion before they proceeded with the cremation?” you asked, fixing your husband’s tie as he looked straight ahead. Straight to where a large portrait of Nana was displayed behind her burial urn, enwreathed by white flowers and candles that served as part of her memorial.

Satoru’s eyes were empty. Although they were dewy from tears, he had also obtained dark circles under his sunken eyes that were becoming more visible as another hour passed by. You could feel him instinctively leaning against your hand when you wiped his rosy cheek and he took a deep breath before finally cutting his gaze away from Nana’s portrait. “I asked dad if we could do a forensic autopsy,” he spoke in a languid voice as he looked at you. “He got mad and said I was only trying to pass the blame onto someone else.”

Your grimace already spoke for itself. What on Earth even was his father’s logic? It seemed that he and his wife were so dead set on blaming Nana’s demise on Satoru that they were refusing to acknowledge any other circumstance that could have resulted in her tragic fate. You could understand that they trusted the clinical autopsy as these reports came from licensed pathologists, but there was no harm in getting an investigation done from a forensic perspective as this was considered an unwitnessed death.

Before you could speak, Satoru pulled you for an embrace and placed his chin above your head. “It’s too late, anyway,” he said, visibly lackluster. “They already cremated her body.”

“This is all my fault.” You had to pull away just so you could let him see the sincerity in your eyes. “I was the one who asked for the divorce and一”

“Don’t blame yourself. You did nothing wrong.” His eyebrows were furrowed and a disapproving frown was setting on his pale lips. “I can take all the blame and be liable for whatever happened to Nana. Even if this was never my intention, I’d rather have the blame on me than on you. You… You already did so much for me. You suffered too much from being with me. The divorce wouldn’t have crossed your mind if I didn’t give you a reason to think about it, so it makes sense that my dad is agreeing to whatever that woman is telling him.”

You shook your head sullenly. “It’s still unfair that you’re getting blamed.” You couldn’t do much to share his suffering, but you spent the next few minutes hugging him tightly and listening to the slow beat of his heart while he received comfort from your warmth. The only time you had to pull away from the embrace was when his mother came inside the viewing room to talk to the both of you.

“Satoru? Y/N?” His mom approached closer, placing the soft palm of her hand on Satoru’s back. “People have arrived for the viewing. Do you wanna greet the guests?”

It was ironic how Satoru’s mom was the one who was accommodating the visitors instead of Eula who should act as the frontman for the grieving family since she was the legal wife. You found it utterly distasteful how Eula always took pride in presenting herself as the lawfully wedded wife when it came to family celebrations, but this time around she was often just hiding in the shadows of her husband and allowing his ex-wife to do all the work.

But you decided not to think too much about it as you grabbed your husband’s hand and squeezed it softly. “You don’t have to seek out each guest,” you told him, receiving a slow nod as a response. That was his cue to go back to his previous seat in front of Nana’s wake because he insisted on being left alone so he could stay with her. With his request, you and your mother respected it by heading out to see the guests who wanted to pay a quick prayer towards the deceased and offer words of sympathies for the grieving family.

Most of the people wore dark and somber colors as proper decorum. Men were in classic suits and ties while women were in simple black attires without any flamboyant patterns to follow funeral etiquette. You were able to recognize half of the businessmen who came as well as Satoru’s cousins and friends. Ieiri and Getou came to greet you first, both showing worry for you and your husband after they heard the unfortunate news. You guided them towards where Satoru was so they could show their presence even if he didn’t wish to talk to anyone at the moment. Knowing that his best friends were here would help bring comfort to his mourning heart.

The guests kept arriving for another hour after they saw the obituary notice in the headlines. There were influential people and even politicians who were all acknowledged by your father-in-law. You didn’t even notice that your own father had already arrived until you saw him next to Satoru’s dad, nodding at each guest and thanking them for their words of sympathy.

“Have you had any sleep, darling?” was the first thing your father asked when you greeted him with a quick embrace. “You look pale.”

Quickly, you gave him a small smile as you responded. “Don’t worry, dad. I can manage. I need to be here for him.”

You could tell by the worry in your father’s eyes that he wanted to ask more details as to why you brought up the divorce, but he was considerate enough not to talk about it for now at least. You considered it a good thing because you were still unprepared to tell him regarding your initial plan about divorcing Satoru because you knew for sure that it would be a long conversation. There were many topics to discuss—the divorce, the merger, and your plan hereafter. It would be better to have that conversation when you were more emotionally capable to do so.

“Is Gen arriving with her family soon?” you inquired, glancing at the other room to where Satoru remained seated for the longest hour.

Your dad nodded and rubbed your shoulder. “She’s heading straight here as soon as the plane arrives,” he informed. “She said they saw the news through social media when they were boarding the plane.”

Personally, you chose not to check the news and your social media for some time even though you were aware that you were receiving a flood of messages from distant family members and friends. Satoru himself did not bother to check his phone all day and he had you holding onto it so you could be the one to tell him if there were any urgent calls that he had to attend to.

There were no calls. Only hundreds of messages from relatives, employees, or simply the people who knew him. What left you surprised, however, was when you saw the lockscreen on his phone. It was you in Iceland, smiling and looking up at the northern lights—the same picture that you deleted from his camera roll out of spite. Your heart nearly jumped when you saw your face on his lockscreen and your curiosity prompted you to check his camera roll to look for all the previous photos he had of Sera, but all of them have been deleted except from the only one he had of you.

You certainly didn’t know how to react to it and you were feeling a wave of conflicting emotions as you remembered his words before you made love to him. I broke up with her, he swore on his life. I want you. Just you.

“Y/N-chan?”

Turning around to the owner of the familiar voice, you happened to see Naoya Zen’in greeting you from the other side of the hallway with Megumi, Maki, and Mai following him from behind. You didn’t expect to see them today, but you were grateful when the twins immediately hugged you with sadness lingering on their pretty faces to show how much they felt sorry for what you had to go through. Setting the business rivalry aside, you appreciated the fact that they came here at all even though they had no obligation to.

“I’m sorry for your loss.” Mai was the first one to offer her condolences before Maki did the same as she pulled away from the hug.

“We’ll be here if there’s anything you need, Y/N-san.”

Similarly, Megumi was bowing at you before he spoke. “My dad’s currently talking to Mr. Chairman, but he’s worried about you.”

Worried about me? It must be because of how your voice cracked when you talked to him over the phone. All of the Zen’in kids looked concerned about your well-being just as much as Toji was, and you found it quite humorous to see how Naoya was the only one who could still greet you casually. There was a trace of sympathy in his eyes, but the man was a frolic by nature, so you couldn’t really tell what his true feelings were behind his mask of playfulness.

“Y/N-chan, I know you’re supposed to look dull because of the somber mood here, but…” his cat-like eyes scanned your face, “…you’re actually glowing.”

Maki had already hit the back of his head before you could respond. “Stop flirting with her. Toji-san’s gonna kill you.”

“It was a genuine statement and you didn’t have to hit me—!”

The bickering elicited a soft, soundless laugh from you and it was somehow refreshing to be able to smile like that again. It had been a while since you last had a reason to laugh, but you owe it to the Zen’ins for always being the solace that you needed during your darkest days. It was amazing how you were able to feel a sense of home even when you were merely surrounded by this family that you were not even closely tied with. You wondered if your husband’s family would ever reach this sort of connection with each other. But considering Nana’s death, it seemed that whatever remaining bond they had was completely destroyed.

There was a change of expression on Naoya’s face when his eyes flickered to the corner of the hallway and you followed his gaze to see a familiar woman with long brown hair, eyes covered by her large sunglasses as she took a peek towards the main hall. It looked like she was purposely trying to avoid any sort of attention and was only seeking someone specific. That someone being your husband, and you kept your eyes glued on the woman until she removed her sunglasses to reveal her identity.

It was Sera.

Of course, why wouldn’t she show up? You already had an inkling that she was going to visit and try to talk to Satoru, but you never realized how surprising it would be to actually see her here. The visitations for regular employees were scheduled for tomorrow. Today was only for family members, business partners, and the elites. Even more, was she not aware that her presence would only cause more chaos to the grieving family?

Because you have announced the divorce, many people would speculate that she had something to do with it and you could only imagine the rage on Gen’s face once she saw her and put the puzzle pieces together. Your sister had no idea about who Sera was and you weren’t sure if she was aware about the divorce, but it would be easy for her to recognize Sera as the ‘homewrecker’ if she had seen her trying to vie for Satoru’s attention. You could stomach it if she wanted to comfort your husband in private, but it was blatant disrespect to your families for her to show up and steal the attention away from Nana.

Perhaps she could feel the intensity of your stare because Sera turned her head towards you and rolled her eyes before she walked out. Now, where on Earth was she headed to?

“You guys okay? You wanna sit in the other room for a while?”

As Sera momentarily left your view, your stepmother-in-law snatched your attention as she came to welcome the Zen’ins in a cordial demeanor. She had a hand placed on Naoya’s back while she tried her best to talk to him and the kids, seemingly trying to make them feel comfortable even when they were in the presence of a business rival.

However, Naoya stiffened next to your in-law and visibly avoided looking at her face. It was for the first time in your life that you had seen this man looking a little uneasy. He must be really uncomfortable with her presence knowing that he disdained the upstarts with passion. You’ve heard it from Satoru when he told you just how much Naoya used to pester him about not ending up like his father for marrying someone like Eula who, as per the Zen’in heir, was causing an embarrassment for the Gojou family’s reputation. The way his playfulness faded the moment Eula came was a clear message that he disliked the woman more than you thought.

“No, it’s fine Mrs. Gojou.” Mai offered a brief, but polite smile towards the older woman.

Fortunately, Yuuta cleared the awkward air as he went to greet the Zen’in kids who had a far better relationship with him as compared to the adults who ran the rival companies. “Hey, guys.”

“Yuuta,” Maki was quick to acknowledge the boy’s presence when he walked in. You could feel how Yuuta was anxious to be around other people, even around you, but you could understand that the boy was going through the same grief as Satoru was. He had been with Nana for nearly eight years and she treated him like her own grandchild despite the lack of connection in their bloodline. It must have been very difficult for a young boy to handle a loved one’s death at this phase of his life because you knew by personal experience how it felt. He needed to be around people who could give him as much comfort as he needed and you were glad that his friends were here for him.

As for you, you had other business to deal with and you took the chance to excuse yourself from them while you walked towards the direction of where Sera went. It wasn’t like you were chasing her away—you were simply decreasing the risk of a scandal coming out because of her visit since she didn’t have the simple logic to think about how her actions could affect the people around her.

If she wanted to talk to Satoru so badly, she could do it at another time but you were never going to allow it tonight. You would stand on your ground and keep her away before she could even think of making a scene at your grandmother-in-law’s wake. Sera should have had the decency to know that this was not the perfect place to be an intruder to a family gathering. She may have gotten away with it in yours and Satoru’s marriage, but this was where you would set the boundaries.

You managed to see her outside of the establishment, walking back and forth as if she was trying to figure out a way on how to reach your husband. There was genuine worry in her eyes that immediately vanished from the moment her gaze landed on you. The shift in her countenance was remarkable, especially with how she raised an eyebrow when you approached her and looked at the surroundings to see if you were at least out of everyone’s earshot.

“What do you want?” she questioned.

As you crossed your arms over your chest, you tried to keep your breathing steady when you sent her a glacial stare. “Leave before my sister sees you here. Take this as a warning.”

“I don’t care about you or your sister,” Sera scoffed, holding her chin up high as though she was unfazed by your hostility. This girl… You frowned. She’s dressed-to-kill at a funeral? You could see her intentions of trying to fit in with the elites, but there was an appropriate time to be wearing tweed coordinates. A funeral wasn’t the right place to make a fashion statement or to stand out as an individual. However, before you could pay more attention to her outfit, her stance had completely changed again as soon as she saw the person walking behind you. “Satoru!”

There, running past you, was Sera who shamelessly enveloped your torpid husband in her arms, soon wiping his bruised cheeks and cupping them into her hands with the desperation of getting him to look at her.

“Sera.” Satoru held her wrist, eyes empty and lifeless.

“I’m sorry this happened.” You could tell by the tone of her voice that she was about to shed faint tears in front of him. “I’m here for you. I’ll be here for you, always.”

You wouldn’t have cared and you were about to pivot on your heels to take your exit, but your feet were stuck on the marble floors as Toji and Naoya walked out of the funeral home only to see the odd situation between your husband and his apparent ex-girlfriend. It was natural to see Toji’s concerned eyes immediately focusing on you, but it was strange to see how Naoya—despite already having seen Sera earlier—was acting shocked at the sight of her and Satoru together. He even placed a hand on his parted mouth in intrigue. What ever happened to the Naoya who became rigid at the sight of your stepmom-in-law next to him?

“You should go home.” Satoru’s voice had you looking back at him after a minute of distraction and you watched how he removed Sera’s hand from his face and stared at her listlessly. “I’ll be alright. I have my wife next to me.”

“B-But…” Sera took another step closer, but could not continue her words.

He was adamant at shaking his head in refusal. “I can’t really entertain people right now except for my wife.”

It was no longer in your personality to rejoice over the bare minimum and yet you still felt satisfied after hearing him say those words to her. Not because you wanted to shove it in Sera’s face, but because you’ve always wanted to know if Satoru could ever pick his own wife over another woman when the right opportunity came. This was the perfect opportunity and he certainly did not fail you.

You couldn’t see Sera’s reaction as her back was turned to you, but you did witness firsthand how she clenched her hand into a fist and raised it out of anger. Satoru flinched as a defense mechanism and your heart dropped to your stomach to see how his body had just instinctively reacted towards any impending violence. Your husband, your poor husband, had gotten used to receiving physical assault to the point where he would recoil over whichever action that his mind registered as a threat.

Was it really just a mechanical response? Or was it because he had received violence from Sera before and he assumed that he would receive it again? You were already fuming at the thought of her laying her hands on him.

“You heard him. You should go home. I’ll have the bodyguards escort you on the way out,” you intervened by adding more authority to your voice. Sera was looking back at you in disbelief as though she was going to fight back if only the two of you were alone.

In the end, she decided to pull up a pitiful face that almost made you roll your eyes. “You’re being so mean. I just wanna be here for him. Please don’t be selfish.”

“It’s not being selfish, it’s respecting people’s boundaries. He’s clearly grieving and wants to be left alone.” How could she even make this about her?

To cut the tension, Satoru took it upon himself to step away from his ex and grab your hand, intertwining it with his as he led you back to the entrance where he faced an awkward Toji and Naoya who looked like they were waiting for their driver.

Toji, being the rational man that he was, gave your husband a few light pats on the back before he spoke to him. “Satoru, I already talked to your father. My heartfelt condolences on your loss.”

“Thank you,” was all that your husband could muster to say, tightening his hold on your hand while glancing at Sera who seemed to be engaged in a staring contest with Naoya. They know each other?

You tried to overlook the fact that Sera and Naoya were sharing communicative looks and instead focused on thanking Toji for his quick visit. “We appreciate you coming here, Toji. You and the Zen’in family.”

Toji looked like he wanted to say more to you, but had limited himself to a few words out of respect for your husband. “Anytime. We’re actually just about to leave.”

“You guys are leaving?” All of you turned to see Satoru’s mom appearing from the main entrance with a small but curious smile on her face. She was then looping her arm around her son’s while looking at Toji, Naoya, and… Sera. “Oh, we have a new visitor. Come in, darling.”

You saw the wave of panic that bathed your husband’s eyes. “No, mom. She’s—”

Toji cut him off. “She’s with us,” he claimed, saving the day by adding, “and we’ll be leaving soon.”

Even Satoru himself was surprised by Toji’s effort to try and cover the whole thing up and he showed appreciation by sending him a discreet nod, squeezing your hand as he pulled you close. “Mom, we should go back.”

Your mom-in-law agreed. “Okay, well一”

“Wait.” Sera halted her footsteps to approach your husband’s mom. Oh, God. Can the world give you a break for once? You could even hear Satoru’s weary exhale as his ex-girlfriend offered a hand to his mom. “You’re his mom? My name’s Sera.”

While your mother-in-law returned her handshake, Gojou was pulling you by the waist as if reminding Sera that she was in the presence of his wife and that she shouldn’t reveal their relationship even if her life was on the line. But because your mom-in-law was curious, she then asked, “Nice to meet you, Sera. You look beautiful. Are you a friend of my son?”

You caught Naoya holding himself back from grinning until Toji nudged him on the rib and glared at him. The younger man then took it as a hint to quit his antics while the latter presented to answer on behalf of Sera. “She’s Naoya’s girlfriend,” Toji announced, only so he could feed your in-law’s curiosity more than anything else.

Naoya, who did not consent to play the fake boyfriend role, had to hide the look of offense on his face because he was scared of Toji more than anyone in this building. “Yeah, she’s not really a girlfriend. Just… no labels. I don’t do the label thing.” Naoya laughed awkwardly, oversharing his romantic endeavors as if Satoru’s mom cared at all. Soon enough, he was pulling a confused Sera closer to him. “But don’t worry about it.”

Satoru was tired. Frankly, you were, too.

He was already emotionally unstable after the overwhelming grief that he had to process in a span of twenty-four hours and dealing with Sera was going to make him lose his mind. The plain sight of fatigue on his face was what prompted you to simply pull him away before you sent your parting bows towards Toji and Naoya, walking back inside the funeral home with his mom following him behind.

By the time you reached the main hall again, Satoru was already too sluggish to acknowledge the rest of the people inside the room and you silently guided him back to his seat in front of Nana’s portrait so you could let him have his peace of mind. This time around, he had his hand interlaced with yours while placing soft kisses on it as his lonely blue eyes stared at Nana’s urn.

His mother was seated on his other side, rubbing his shoulder in comfort and providing the motherly warmth that she failed to give him for the last eight years. You could tell that your thoughts overlapped with hers because it surprised you when you saw how glossy her eyes became when she looked at her only son. “Satoru, I understand why you hate mom now. I’m sorry.”

Your husband kept a stoic expression that emphasized his sunken face. “Nana was the only mother I had left.”

It felt like you shouldn’t be here to hear them have their heart-to-heart talk, but Satoru was tightening his hold on your hand and refusing to let you go. Was it your presence that was keeping him intact? You assumed that he wouldn’t be as numb as he was now if you weren’t next to him. A lot of people could fall unhinged with the shock of bereavement, but he was not reaching that state yet because he had you as a distraction.

“I know. I know I shouldn’t have left you behind, but I…” While clasping her hand around her son’s, her lips quivered from the downpour of regret that washed over her. “I wouldn’t have been able to give you the life that you wanted if I took you with me. You’re an heir and you’ve always dreamed of running the business since you were a little boy. Your father couldn’t let you have the company if I didn’t leave you behind.”

He closed his eyes and held his breath. “Did you know that dad physically abused me and still does up to this day?”

Satoru’s mom teared up in silence. “No. No, I was made to believe that you were doing well. He tried to cut me off of any form of contact with you for years until I had realized that you were the one refusing to get in touch with me. I understand why. I’m sorry that mom wasn’t there to protect you, Satoru. No words can express how regretful and broken I am for what I had unknowingly put you through. I’m… I can see why you don’t want me to be around you anymore, but I hope that you can at least let mom make it up to you.”

Her last words seemed to have awakened a recent memory in your husband’s brain because his eyes went back and forth between you and his mother as though he was juxtaposing the situation in his head. You could not read his mind, but you were able to discern his thoughts based on the emotion—or lack thereof—on his face. He must be thinking, ‘how could I not give her a chance when I promised my wife the same thing?’

“It’s not your fault that he’s built that way,” he said after a while, referring to his father with a bitter taste in his mouth. ��He’d still have found someone else to hurt one way or another.”

There was pain in your mother-in-law’s face as she caressed her son’s cheek and embraced him in her arms. The longingness between a mother and son could be felt from the atmosphere that surrounded the two of them and it somehow felt like a heavy weight had been lifted off your shoulders knowing that Satoru allowed the chance to mend things with his mom. Moments like these reminded you of your own mother and your eyes moved on its own to search for your dad who was standing at the doorway talking to your relatives, but glancing at you every now and then to make sure that you were doing okay.

Surprisingly, you were doing okay for someone who had a heart condition that could lessen your lifespan exponentially if you didn’t take care of yourself. You weren’t even sure how you would be able to tell it to your husband and your father all the more.

Perhaps, dying in your sleep would be better than suffering in a hospital bed fighting for your life.

Why doesn’t he look at me?

Sera repeatedly asked herself that question as she watched Satoru’s figure fading into view. She only wanted to comfort him and let him know that she was here for him, but how come he didn’t seem to appreciate even the minuscule effort that she had placed into seeing him? It wasn’t easy to sneak into this godforsaken place and the fact that she tried her best to see him should be warranted with gratitude. Sera didn’t even have the luxury to linger around like this when she had her family to deal with back home, so she felt that it was a little bit unfair how her sincerity was being taken for granted.

Has Satoru allowed himself to be brainwashed by you?

And wasn’t it weird that he didn’t even display any ounce of jealousy when Naoya played along and claimed that he was dating her? Sera despised how she was being refused the privilege to be acknowledged by his mom because of you and she absolutely hated how you were walking around with your chin up high so you could look down at her. If there was no funeral, she would have made a scene already but she had to pull herself together because she was a dignified woman who knew better than to be petty with someone like you.

“When the driver arrives, you tell him your address and we’ll drop you off.” Toji spoke to her with a voice that was an octave deeper than Gojou’s. As he stood like a fine man dressed in a classic suit and tie, Sera’s anger had quickly faded now that he was talking to her.

“It’s okay. You can just drop me off the subway,” she instructed, facing the man who simply nodded at her while she looked at him with a hopeless look on her face. Why couldn’t she have fallen in love with someone like Toji instead? Her heart was hurting the more she thought of Satoru, especially now that he was betraying her love by choosing you over her and it was greatly upsetting her inside.

“What’s taking them so long? I’m getting impatient here, Toji-kun.” Naoya, on the other hand, would have been a perfect candidate as Sera’s love interest if only he wasn’t too high maintenance for her.

Toji placed his hands inside his pockets and looked around. “Stop your whining. I already texted Megumi. The twins are just saying goodbye to Yuuta.”

While the blond puffed out his cheeks in response, Sera decided to start a conversation with her dear friend to distract her depressive thoughts. “Did you get to greet Miss Eula?”

“She’s too busy.” Naoya looked around in panic before sending a wary gaze back at her. “Don’t ask about her right now.”

But why? Wasn’t he close enough to her that she even treated him like her own son? Sera was puzzled with the way Naoya had reacted, but they were soon distracted at the presence of another woman’s arrival.

Needless to say that this woman was a long-standing member of high society. Even though she donned a simple black trapeze, her domineering aura and intimidating presence reminded Sera of the archetypal boss ladies in the Gojou Group. It didn’t even surprise her when Toji greeted the woman after she stepped out of a sedan with her husband.

“Toji Zen’in?” She lit up at the sight of him. That smile, those eyes… “How long have you been here?”

Toji greeted her and her husband with a handshake. “Just about to leave. Did you arrive in Japan just today?”

“Yeah. We came here straight off the PJ. It’s a mess, I can’t even keep up with everything that happened while we were gone.”

“It must be overwhelming. You should go check with your sister, Gen.”

Gen? Sera turned to Naoya who was grinning on the side. This is your sister? She could now see what the blond had just told her about when he gave brief descriptions about the woman. She was living to the expectations that were set on her as a strong, outspoken woman who didn’t hold back at lowering her voice the way you did. Sera wasn’t scared, but she was deeply curious to see just how different this woman was from you.

“I definitely should. It was nice seeing you, though. Hey, Naoya.” And after greeting the blond, Gen’s eyes had then found her. She wasn’t scrutinizing nor was her gaze full of judgement. She only seemed to be genuinely curious as to who Sera was, eyes travelling on her from head-to-toe which appeared to be a stupid trait that all rich people shared.

But before she could ask who she was, the three Zen’in kids already came out of the funeral home and Toji was insisting for everyone to get inside their luxury van before Gen could try to start a conversation with Sera. Well, all she received from the woman was a raised eyebrow before she and Toji exchanged a cheek kiss.

Was Toji trying to save Sera from any conflict? Or was he doing this for your reputation?

She had these thoughts in mind during the entire car ride and Sera had chosen to stay silent than to pick a fight with Mai who had been nothing but hostile towards her. It was better to hold her class than to deal with an insecure teenage girl with a rotten, snobbish attitude. She was too unbelievably pompous for someone who was only living off of her daddy’s money and Sera was sure that this girl wouldn’t even last long doing a single day of hard work.

But enough of Mai, because Sera was too downcast when she came home and checked her phone to see not a single message of apology from Satoru. Did she really not mean anything to him? Did he not appreciate that she was there for him in his most difficult time?

As Sera sat on her bed, she saw her reflection on the mirror despite the dim light that the lampshade offered and she was feeling empty the more she looked at herself. She was pretty, smart, and hard working. Her model-like appearance could turn heads in a crowded room. She even rejected many guys just to stay loyal to Gojou, but now he decided to hurt her like this? Wasn’t he the same man who always expressed how he couldn’t get enough of her? He used to even stay past office hours just so he could spend some alone time with her, and now he couldn’t even spare her a look of appreciation?

She was heartbroken and not even her pride could hide that. Not even her dignity could accept the kind of woman that she had become after loving a man like Satoru Gojou. He was her life and soul—a partner that she cherished more than anyone else in this world. How could he do this?

“Onee-chan?”

Sera wiped her tearful eyes and unintentionally smudged her mascara when her brother, Jiro, came to peek inside her room. “What is it?”

“Are you okay?” The worry in his voice comforted her and she allowed him to sit next to her while more tears gushed out of her eyes. Pathetic. She felt pathetic for hurting like this as she remembered every instance where Satoru chose you. At the parking lot of the bowling alley, outside of the hospital, and now in front of his own wife at the funeral home.

“I’m not okay,” she gave a truthful answer towards her younger brother, sniffing and wiping the tears that streamed down on her rosy cheeks. “Jiro, nee-chan’s been having it rough lately. I’m sorry if I take out my anger on you and Nari. I’m just really stressed sometimes.”

Her brother let her rest her head on his shoulders as she teared up. “It’s okay… We understand.”

“Have you been studying well? Anything you need for school?” she asked, remembering how her brother often went to school with barely enough money to have proper meals other than convenience store noodles. It wasn’t healthy food for a college student whose brain was always functioning day and night and she felt like a total failure for not being able to provide enough for her siblings. Despite the money she had received from Gojou’s father, most of it already went to pay the rent of their new house and the others to pay the debt that their burdensome father left them with. Life had always been very unfair to her since the beginning.

But her brother, in spite of their limited sources, was working extra hard to help his sister. “Don’t worry about me, nee-chan. I just started a part-time job at a fast food chain so I can help you out.”

Sera sat up straight and looked at her brother with wide, glossy eyes. “Wh-What do you mean? How can you focus on your studies?”

“It’s okay. I can manage it.” His reassuring smile didn’t make her feel any better because her own guilt was consuming her. “If you’re ever stressed from work, treat yourself with whatever you want. Buy yourself some new shoes, make up, or a dress. Go out and eat at an expensive restaurant. Don’t think about giving every single penny to us. Mom’s trying to find a way to earn money, too. And Nari just started selling cookies at her school so she could have her own allowance. We’re all helping you out, nee-chan.”

At that point, Sera was already weeping next to her brother after hearing all the effort that they were putting just to lessen the weight on her shoulders. “Just make s-sure to tell me if y-you need anything, okay?” she said, barely seeing from the tears that clouded her vision. “You and Nari will always be my priority.”

“And you will be our priority when we grow up.” Jiro’s grin warmed her heart. “I promise when I earn enough money, Nari and I will get that Birkin bag that you want.”

She chuckled through her tears and embraced her younger brother. “I love you guys so much.”

The next three days had been hectic. Aside from the reporters that stayed outside the gates, many visitors have also arrived each hour to pay tribute to the mother of the Gojou Group’s chairman. Many people have expressed their sympathies and condolences towards the bereaved and the support was definitely helping in terms of alleviating the magnitude of the immediate family’s grief. Satoru hasn’t had the chance to talk to his father and his stepmother again after the day of the cremation, but the lack of communication was because he was purposely avoiding them. The tension was still high and he knew better not to stir the pot while knowing full well that it would only lead to more confrontations.

As for you, you were grateful enough that Gen didn’t try to inundate you with questions regarding the divorce. You were guessing that your dad gave her a head start to not bring the topic up until after the burial rites because you were already dealing with a lot. Although, you did notice how Gen was distancing herself from Satoru. Your husband still treated her like normal, but she couldn’t even hide her displeasure when he tried to speak to her, limiting their conversations to just a few sentences before she would walk away from him.

You felt bad for the way your sister was treating your husband, someone who looked up to her and was close to her like her own sibling, but you also couldn’t blame Gen for acting that way. She was protective of you and it was natural for her to be suspicious of what Satoru had done that led you with the ultimatum of a divorce.

You would never tell her about the infidelity unless Satoru himself would admit it. What you have decided with was to cite your divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences because it was the best path to take. The public would not shame him for committing adultery and your families would be more accepting towards your separation.

But right now wasn’t the time to think about it. On the day of Nana’s funeral procession, you acted as an anchor of support for your mourning husband who was drowning from his own tears while he delivered his eulogy in front of everyone before they placed his beloved grandmother in her final resting place. The whole ceremony was emotional, but the loudest cry of all came from his stepmother who weeped behind her Hermés handkerchief and Dior sunglasses. She was quite the scene stealer that even Yuuta looked visibly uncomfortable with his own mother’s actions.

The Gojou family have their own private columbarium that housed their late grandfather and you were tearing up alongside your husband after you remembered that one conversation you recently had with Nana. The image of her gleeful face as she talked about her late-husband was deeply etched into your heart. At least, even if things ended tragically, you were comforted by the thought that she had now reunited with her one true love.

You, on the other hand, have a completely broken husband to take care of. Even though you experienced some chest pains during the burial rights, you’ve certainly had worse ones before because you didn’t have the necessary medication that you needed back then.

Ieiri showed her concern when she approached you after the interment of ashes and noticed how Satoru remained standing in front of the gravestone even when people had started to leave. “Are you holding up well?” she worriedly asked, pulling you for a quick but comforting hug. “Don’t forget to take your medicines on time, okay?”

You nodded in reassurance just as Getou appeared behind her. “I’ll be okay. Have you guys had the chance to talk to Satoru?”

Suguru tilted his head to peek at your husband and sighed. “Yeah, but he’s always spaced out. I guess I should give him a week or two to recover first. This was really sudden.”

“True,” Shoko agreed, sorrowful. “Are you sure you can take care of yourself, Y/N? Your husband isn’t emotionally stable right now. I can stay with you if you need me or anything.”

You appreciated her offer, but they had their own lives, too. “No, it’s okay I promise. Satoru’s mom is actually staying in Tokyo for a few months so she’s gonna be there for us.”

Getou raised his eyebrows at the information. “Oh, I thought Auntie just came here because it was an emergency. Have they reconciled?”

The small smile that you had plastered on your face was already an answer to his question. “Yeah, and his mom’s actually setting up a new branch for their restaurant here in Tokyo so she won’t be going back to Osaka for a while. I guess it's the perfect opportunity for them to reconnect.”

After an hour or so, Satoru was the last man standing when everyone else had already left and you waited for him until he was finally ready to leave, stealing the car key from his pocket and insisting that you would be in charge of driving. He barely had the energy to do anything and you didn’t want to risk a car crash because he was still deep in his sorrow.

But instead of driving straight to the penthouse, you decided to take a detour to Odaiba and earned the confusion of your husband who wouldn’t stop asking what you were up to.

“Nothing,” you ended up answering. “Just thought we should grab a quick fro-yo like old times?”

He took your hand as soon as you got out of his McLaren. “You remember?”

“Of course, I do.”

The fro-yo place had been here since you were ten years old and it was a great feeling to see that it had risen up as one of the most iconic fro-yo places in Tokyo fifteen years after. This place was memorable because his mom and yours used to take you both here to have your monthly fro-yo fix after a long day at the park. You recognized the look on Satoru’s face when he entered the shop and you instantly knew that he was having the nostalgia of his childhood memories with you.

“Should we get the usual?” he asked, never once letting go of your hand.

You peeked at the available toppings and marveled at the abundance of flavors that you could choose from. “If you still remember mine. I remember yours. It’s matcha with pistachio.”

For the first time in a long while, you were finally able to see the upward curve of his lips again. His eyes were still empty, but seeing even a little bit of his smile made your heart flutter. “Yours is banana and strawberry cheesecake.”

“This is so cheesy. We’re acting like teenagers,” you teased, scrunching your nose and feeling his soft plump lips pressed on your cheek. His kiss was fleeting and yet it meant the world to you to see how you could at least lessen the pain that he had in his heart. To see that you could erase the sadness in his face even for a short moment.

The whole fro-yo date may be sweet and romantic, but it was a different case when you returned back home. It seemed that there was nothing left of Satoru’s energy as he headed to bed earlier than usual. You had just finished your night bath when you came out to see him staring at the ceiling, perhaps self-reflecting of how he was going to move on from Nana’s death. The lack of sleep may have taken its toll because he had very prominent bags under his eyes and his skin wasn’t looking the healthiest even from afar.

You had the brilliant idea to give him a little skincare when you walked into your bedroom, freshly showered as you straddled his lap and unwrapped your go-to Guerlain Orchidée Impériale Sheet Mask.

“What’s that, baby?” he asked, hands gripping your thighs while he rested his back on the headboard. “Is that the mask that costs three hundred dollars?”

You suppressed a smile as you remembered using his black card when you purchased it online two months ago, which was why he recognized it easily. “I’ll pay you back,” you promised, putting your pink hairclips on him to keep his hair away from his face. How cute. And just then, you started placing the cold, slimy sheet on his forehead down to his cheeks. “Nothing’s too expensive when it comes to skin care.”

That was a lie. Three hundred dollars over a pack of four sheet masks was surely expensive and a waste of money, but this brand was your favorite and your husband didn’t exactly care much about the price tag.

“You don’t have to pay me anything in return,” he insisted, now placing his hands on your hips and keeping it there as you continued aligning the sheet on his face. “Actually, no. You can pay me with a kiss.”

Without any complaints, you leaned in and pressed your lips on top of his, indulging him with a soft kiss before you pulled away. “Done.”

You have gotten used to the feeling of connecting your lips to his, but the way he stared at you after the kiss was what increased the speed of your heartbeat. His blue eyes reflected a kaleidoscope of emotions—love, regret, sorrow, and appreciation. There were more emotions in his broad spectrum, but what dominated the most was his misery.

How could such a lighthearted moment suddenly shift back into something heavy again?

“I love you,” he said, voice laced with despondency.

His hand moved to tuck your hair behind your ear before he caressed your back as though he was comforted by your mere presence in his life. Still, you had no answer as to why you hesitated in returning those three words back to him. Nothing would come out of your mouth even if you opened it and you felt terrible because you knew just how badly he wanted to hear it from you.

“I love you. You don’t have to say it back,” he repeated while brushing his thumb on the apple of your cheek. “You do so much for me. You try so hard to be the best wife I could ever ask for. You stayed with me even though I had been unbearable. You listened to my trauma, put up with my cheating, and constantly forgave me for all the fucked up things I did even if you never heard any apology from me until recently. Nana said I should feel blessed to have a woman like you in my life, but how can I tell her that I don’t deserve you?”

You were at a loss of words. And at a loss of space to breathe all the more. Gojou’s mind was a befuddled mess, but you weren’t expecting that he would pour out his emotions like this again after three consecutive days of producing so many tears that left him like a dried prune. Should you say that he deserved you despite everything? Or should you be more honest and agree that you’ve been too selfless as a wife?

A soft sigh escaped his lips as he continued his monologue with a question. “Do you still want the divorce?”

At one simple question, you lost the ability to think straight. “I don’t know…”

And yet him… He seemed to have already thought this through. It looked like he had gone over it in his head a million times until he had finally decided, out of respect for you, to simply accept the end of this marriage. “Would it make you happy if I let you go?”

“Why are you—” You couldn’t tell him that your heart was splitting into two, or at least the fact that the pain felt that way. Your chest was tighter than usual and you were forced to rub your hand over your heart to try and soothe the very illness that he was not even aware of. “Why are you asking me this now?”

His eyes found the ceiling where you watched how faint tears emerged from his eyelids. The slow fluttering of his lashes signaled his exhaustion and you dreaded hearing the words that he was about to say. “I always end up hurting the people around me somehow. I don’t wanna destroy you for staying with me.”

Was this truly the same man who begged on his knees just to make you stay?

“We can talk about it at another time.” You avoided meeting his eyes and crawled out of his lap, tucking yourself under the duvet and turning your back on him. You had to or else he would see the gloom that casted your face like a cloudy sky. “Let’s go to sleep.”

Satoru couldn’t remember when he last slept for twelve hours straight, but the overall exhaustion that he had for the past few days made him numb. Sleeping in brought him comfort because that way he could shut down the despair that was gnawing at his soul when his mind wasn’t conscious. It didn’t really help that he had no motivation to get up from bed, but the only reason why he was standing barefoot on the carpeted floors was because you weren’t in bed when he woke up the next day.

It was a routine. Gojou was so used to seeing your face the first thing in the morning that he often felt empty when you disappeared from his line of sight. He was overthinking—no, paranoid was the right term. His mind was suggesting that maybe you had chosen to leave him because he was such a heavy baggage to carry along and he couldn’t really blame you for feeling that way. However, when he stepped out of the bedroom, he could smell the inviting aroma of freshly brewed coffees and he found you in the kitchen preparing a lavish breakfast for you two.

“Good morning,” you were the first one to greet him while he walked straight towards you.

His greeting was a peck on the lips before he embraced you in his arms. “Morning.”

“You need to eat a lot, okay? Consider this your brunch.” The motherly tone on your voice was quite endearing and he adored how you could manage to be such a calming presence to him without even trying.

When he cupped your cheeks, he pressed the tip of your noses together and rubbed it against each other. “How can I get used to mornings without you?”

How could he find joy to start his day once he was no longer with you? Life was surely a rollercoaster ride. It was crazy to think how he used to neglect you in the first few months of your marriage and he even promised himself that he didn’t need you until he had fallen in love, again. Frankly, nothing could compare to the gratifying feeling and the intensity of his emotions after he realized just how in love he was with you. He could fall in love with you every single day and not get tired of the electricity that sparked in his heart because you were the only person that could send him into seventh heaven.

Though, on your part, it looked like you were just doing your obligation as a wife. “Sit down and eat,” you instructed, ignoring his question and forcing him to take his seat on the bar stool.

Satoru obeyed your commands and drank from his cup of Americano, eyes trailing on you while you took out the box of lemon bars from the refrigerator. He was already munching on the crispy bacon strips that you had cooked and remembered how much you craved those lemon squares yesterday when you dropped by at a bakery after your quick fro-yo date.

“Why do you like those so much?” he inquired, keeping you trapped under his curious stare.

You placed the delicacy near your nose, engulfing yourself with its sweet smell before you took a bite. “Because it’s so good.”

With the way your eyes sparkled as you happily ate those bars, Gojou was already full just by watching you. He could buy you a hundred boxes of your favorite dessert if it meant that he had to see the felicity in your face each time you took a bite. Unfortunately, the bliss was only momentary because you were soon pressing your palm on your chest and downing a glass of water to calm yourself down.

“Hey, are you okay?” he asked, getting up from his seat to quickly stand on your side.

You tried to wave him off, but whimpered when the pain on your chest had seemingly gotten worse. “Nng—my med… medicine. Can you please—?”

Panic flashed before his eyes. “Where is it? What medicine?”

“P-Pink make up bag.”

He knew exactly what you were referring to and he was dashing back to the bedroom at lightning speed just to grab the make up pouch that you hid inside your drawer, hastily taking it with him when he returned to you. “Here. Do you wanna go to the hospital? You don’t look okay.” The sight made his heart pound faster than normal and he froze like solid ice as he saw how you scrambled through the pouch, withdrawing a small white bottle spraying it under your tongue. “What’s…”

You were gasping as he held you for support, but your panic attack didn’t lessen even as you used the spray. “I’m o-okay. It’s just—”

What’s happening to my wife?!

Before he could ask again, you fainted into his arms and he was shell-shocked by how fast things had escalated. All he knew was that he had to get you to a hospital at that very instant or else he might reach the zenith of losing his sanity if anything bad happened to you.

Being at a hospital again was quite a traumatic experience for Satoru, but he endured the fresh memories that lingered in his head just to ensure that you would get all of the necessary treatment that they could provide because he had gotten to a point of being extremely discomposed.

He could die today and not be surprised, but losing you through death would kill him a million times worse.

Even as your peaceful, sleeping body lay still on the ER’s hospital bed, he was pacing back and forth hoping that you would wake up soon.

What should he do? Call Gen? Tell his mom? Get Ieiri to come down and see you?

A fusillade of questions went through his disconcerted mind until a doctor opened the curtains, receiving the eager eyes of a husband who was desperate to hear some news about his wife.

“Mr. Gojou, her body’s just recuperating from fatigue,” the doctor reassured, tilting his head to see you shifting very carefully in your sleep. Still, Satoru wasn’t content with his assuring words and the doctor expected it. “Would you mind stepping out for a moment so we can discuss your wife’s condition?”

Was it serious? He nodded and followed the doctor who walked not too far away from your section of the ER and faced Satoru with a fairly neutral expression. “Doc, what’s happening to her? Is there anything I should worry about?”

Satoru literally just had to deal with his grandma’s death and he couldn’t withstand the stress of dealing with another grave situation.

The older man—Dr. Mori as labeled on his lab coat—sent him a hesitant look before revealing some important details about your health. “I’m not sure how much you have discussed with your wife, but her heart is very fragile and requires a lot of care. It appears that the patient was under constant stress for the past week and this is one of the two factors that heightened her angina attack.”

“A-Angina?” Satoru’s eyes went wide.

His whole world stopped before him.

“Yes. She was diagnosed with stable angina,” Dr. Mori confirmed, much to your husband’s horror. “But there is another factor that requires her to have more rest. You need to take good care of your wife, Mr. Gojou. Her body needs a lot of nutrients so she can carry safely.”

He could barely process this whole thing in his head because the news kept coming one after another, leaving him in a befuddled state with a flood of unanswered questions running through his mind. “What do you mean…?”

“Your wife is seven weeks pregnant.”

jjk general taglist: @kity @deeznutss @suhkusa @wonyoschubs @the-golden-jhope @6mattsun9 @hokageyamz @ermahgerd-larry-and-ziam @crashica @aizawap @juniorhooter @atsumusoup @gxtitobxby @strawberries-en-cream @dora-the-grownup @softy-woo @tsumume @kac-chowsballs @anime-nymph @kageyamakock @onlyonew @underratedmage @katsulovee @crapimahuman @alicia-1725 @fatal-impact @drippedcream

sincerely not taglist: @itsnotsoni @pluviophilefangirl @daphnxy @Icveaesop @choso-bee @sparklingblacktea @omisemi @captainchrisstan @http-strawbebbies @buttercups145 @xllance @jonsncws @and-you-found-me @tobiotetsu @jeonjungkookismyfuture @d-efend @honouredsatoru @my-reality-is-in-my-head @blueowl51 @misslovingpearl @cuteissei @japanesevenom @borpcorp @ushi-bakatoshi @idyllicodyssea

#gojou satoru x reader #gojou satoru x you #gojou satoru angst #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru angst #gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo angst #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk angst

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cdroloisms · 3 years ago

Note

i think that although the theories/aus of puffy's son dream and wil's brother dream are interesting to think about, especially the implications, the (probably) canon statement that he really has no family to me hits the hardest. because it's just dream, you know. his friends hate him, he has none (p relatable), but i can't really imagine,, both not having friends and not having a family. that's kind of what keeps a lot of us sane and okay ( - quill anon (same anon from the c!tubbo c!wil ask) )

ouch quill anon ,, this ask Hurt. it’s true - usually, it’s our family and friends that keep us going, that are the ones that we fight for and live for and love for. c!dream’s “family” was his reasoning behind ,, a lot of the stuff he did, good or bad, and even now you can hear his desperation in getting someone, anyone to visit sometimes, in wanting to know how people are doing outside the cell.

at the same time, he’s a character very much defined by his solitude, by his isolation, by all of the time he has spent,, alone. by the alliances that had been broken, betrayed, forgotten. by how- at the end of the day - he sits for hours on end in an obsidian box with nothing but his thoughts to accompany him. it’s awfully ,, sad, despite everything he’s done. through it all, he’s alone. he survives the horrors of the vault (until this current arc) alone. nobody’s there to hear his thoughts. nobody knows his mindset, or feelings, or wants, or anything that really makes him human. for someone so driven by people, he spends so much time completely isolated - and it’s. honestly really, really tragic.

anyway, this is a sad little drabble set pre-roommates arc abt c!dream in the prison, alone, bc he makes me Sad.

tw: mentioned torture, abuse, violence, broken bones, blood, injuries, mental deterioration, isolation, panic attacks, self-deprecation, trauma, memory loss, death, contemplations of death, dark content, dark imagery

The blank book in his hand stares at him stubbornly, the stark white of the untouched pages nearly burning his eyes, used to the dark walls and floor of the cell. Dream’s hand shakes around his quill, ink splotches marring the pages from where his too-unsteady hand had let the nib brush against the paper and left freckles of black spots behind. He pulls his thumb back from the bottom left corner, hissing slightly when it leaves a dull red fingerprint behind, a smudge of half-dried blood further dirtying the paper.

He’d pulled out one of the books for some reason, probably on a whim, letting his hands run over the leather spine and along the thread of the binding absentmindedly after Quackity left for the day. He hadn’t touched them in a while - he liked to save them, at the beginning, just in case visitors came and he wanted to thank them or if he needed to communicate (though he hadn’t gone silent since Sapnap left, ‘cause Sapnap wanted him to talk and he doesn’t know why he still clings to that visit when it’s been months and he still hasn’t come back, but he promised that if Dream behaved he’d visit again and - it’s stupid to hope, but Dream can’t give up, not yet) and then he kept them because he would need them for the revive book and the Warden would confiscate them, anyway, so it was better not to get attached. Regardless, he’d stubbornly ignored the chest of books for a long time, let the remain closed and the clasp go unlatched as he wasted his days away watching the walls drip bright purple and pretend he didn’t miss his clock.

Until now.

He runs his fingers along the surface of the paper again, ignoring the red and black smudges they leave in their wakes, ruining the previously unblemished pages. The paper is smooth, bearing a very slight grain, and smells clean and woody - this book must’ve been a newer one the Warden replaced into the chest. He’d counted the pages a few times, front and back - there are fifty sheets, so a hundred pages to use as he sees fit, completely empty and untouched. The quill shakes in his hand, the tip pressed against the paper, unmoving.

What is there to write?

He’s forgotten why he pulled out the book in the first place, already - his head keeps getting fuzzier, memory impossibly fragmented and seemingly worsening with every passing day. He knows he had a reason because he’d been very determined about it, had spent what must have been hours dragging himself along the obsidian floor with a broken shinbone jutting out of his right leg and a dislocated left shoulder that he’d taken an extra few minutes to jam back in place by pressing it against the floor. Something had come into his head, probably in the middle of Quackity’s daily session, and he’d found himself desperate to write it down before he forgot despite the throbbing of his head and the pain in his chest making it impossible to take a full breath.

(He must have talked back, or acted defiant, or something - he doesn’t remember much besides the look Quackity had given him after, dark and angry and tight with rage. There had been a hand tangled in his hair, a blade jammed right up against his throat, curses and screams in his ears dying into a singular ringing echo as the blade was pushed deeper and deeper. It wasn’t until a few minutes later when Quackity realized that he’d gone too deep and that Dream was choking on his own blood - his memories shatter, and there’s nothing but more screaming, red and black and blood everywhere, warm against his skin, the sweet-sour taste of glistening melon on his tongue, a healing pot desperately stitching his skin together and bringing him back from the darkness that he’d swelled in the corners of his vision - mostly, he remembers everything going cold and numb and he’d realized, halfway into the Void, that he would never leave the Vault alive.)

His hands tighten on the book as he breathes a shallow, harsh breath through his teeth, because - oh. Oh. He looks back at the trembling white plume in his hand, at his shaking fingers clenched tightly near the end, and he swallows the thick, heavy feeling in his throat. Quackity had- and he had- and then-

Right.

He forces air into his lungs steadily, counting the seconds off in his head. He’d learned how to stave off panic attacks on his own ages ago, and the knowledge had come to full use in the Vault - the struggle to stay calm seems harder with every passing day, but he can’t exactly risk himself passing out every three seconds when he’s inevitably set off by the smell of blood or a twinge of pain or any of the million other triggers crammed into this tiny box that’s been the source of all of his torment for months. He keeps up the slow, steady breathing for another few minutes, just enough time to pull back the darkness creeping in from the edges of his vision, and looks back down at the blank paper.

It stares back at him, almost judgmental of his hesitancy. You opened me up, it seems to challenge him, why aren’t you writing? The quill still shakes in his hand. He doesn’t know if it’ll ever stop shaking again.

Dear, he begins, almost in defiance, proof that he Is Going To Write Something, thank you very much, he isn’t just going to chicken out and leave it a blank book (like you have before?) but the quill tip digs into the paper as he grinds to a sudden halt, the empty space next to the first word nearly taunting. He feels his mouth dry, heat rising behind his eyes - the book, silent and blank as ever, stays imprinted in his vision even as he squeezes them shut.

Dear, what a stupid, sentimental way to start a letter. He can’t even fool himself into thinking of it as a business venture, turn it into an elaborate plan to escape and address it to either Techno or Wilbur (who would never receive his message anyway), not without admitting his regard for the two edged past his pretense of professional interested and owed favors. He can hardly write it to Ranboo, not without compromising their already fragile alliance (if it even exists, anymore. The enderman hybrid had yet to visit for months - and sure, it was probably for the best, who knows how Quackity would react if he found out about the nature of their relationship, but that didn’t make it sting any less.)

In the back of his minds, name rise from where he’d kept them carefully buried despite his best efforts. Punz. Bad. Puffy. Sapnap. George. He shakes his head, trying to wave away them from his thoughts, but the effort is as fruitless as it has always been - he stares at the first word angrily, like it has betrayed him, and receives no response. The words are messy, shaking, his script overly looping and rounded like a child’s. He hates it, hates how cheery it looks, even on the bloodstained page - it looks like the beginning of a birthday card, or a perhaps a particularly dedicated Halloween party invite. Like he’s some sort of lovesick teen, writing letters to crushes that would never pay him a second glance. He laughed a little, without any real humor - minus the romance, that description isn’t all that far off.

Because- well. His memories might be shot to all hell, but he doubts he’ll ever forget the hatred on Sapnap’s face, a loaded crossbow pointed between his eyes, George’s expression set in disinterested apathy - “George, you can give the word.” Bad’s face, twisted in pity and resignation, voice carefully measured as he looks away and gestures at the cell, “you did do some pretty bad stuff to get put in here though, Dream,” the hidden “you deserve it” that he’d heard, just as clearly behind the words. Punz - “you should’ve paid me more” - jaw set stiffly as people poured through the portal, watching, wordless, as Dream bled out twice on that blackstone floor. Puffy, poorly hidden disgust flickering over her face as she looks away from him being dragged away in chains, sword held steady in her hands. Sapnap, that same fiercely determined expression on his face so familiar that thinking of it aches, even now, “it’s gonna be me, who takes your final life.” Months and months and months and months, alone.

Always, always, alone.

The page makes a quiet, complaining groan under his pen - he looks down to see it torn under the tip of his quill, the word completely unreadable under line after line of black ink scratched over it, each one deeper than the last. He stares blankly at it for a few minutes longer, the brief flash of anger that had seared through his body settling into numbness once more.

To whoever may find this: he scratches the words on the page slowly, keeping his print deliberately blocky and neat. The heavy feeling in his throat returns, stronger than ever, and he ignores it as he pushes on.

He pauses for a moment, wondering what more to write. Apologies? Accusations? He could detail every second that he remembers from Quackity’s visits, describe every inch of pain that had been pulled from his aching lungs, every line etched into his skin. He could apologize for every act of cruelty that had ever been caused by his hands, every bridge he’d ever torched to light the path to a better future. He could explain - everything, every tortured thought that had circled his head for hours on end and every night that had passed without any sleep and every time he’d pushed on without complaint or hesitancy because it would be worth it, even if he was the only one who saw it, it would be worth it because he’d sacrifice too much for it to be anything but. He could- he could, he could write and write until he’d filled every page of every book back and front, and would they even believe him? Would it even matter?

Goodbye, he writes at last. It feels strangely final. (He won’t be leaving this Vault alive. He knows this as surely as he knows that he will leave this world uncared for, unheard. As surely as he knows that he’ll always be alone.) With a quick snap of magic following the signing of his name, the book is preserved, shining slightly with a purple glow as he sets it back down in the chest. He looks around, the cell once again stiflingly quiet without the book to busy him, Dream once again completely alone as he’s been for - well.

(Pandas, eyebrows drawn in uncharacteristic seriousness from the usually painfully spirited eight-year-old, pinkie raised between the two of them, solemnity belied by the gap in his front teeth poking out between his lips.

“We’ll be together forever,” he whispered with the volume control you’d expect from a kid that age, which is to say that it wasn’t much of a whisper at all, but Dream, newly ten years old, remembers being particularly moved by the gesture anyway, moving to hesitantly hook his own pinkie in the other’s.

“And we’ll never be alone ever again,” he’d replied, voice faraway with a disbelieving sort of awe.”

“Never,” Pandas’ voice had been just as firm as his first statement, twisting his wrist to tighten the grip of their linked fingers further. “Best friends for ever and ever, right?”

“For ever and ever.”)

“For ever and ever,” he whispers, eyes fluttering shut as he slumps down against the floor, and only the lava bubbles in reply.

#tw torture #tw abuse #tw violence #tw broken bones #tw injuries #tw mental deterioration #tw isolation #tw panic attack #tw self deprecation #tw trauma #tw memory loss #tw death #tw dark content #tw dark imagery #-> my writing #my writing :D #my asks !!#-> my asks #quill anon !

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smells-like-mettaton · 3 years ago

Note

Perhaps #5 (Hold my Hand) with Papyton for the fic ask game if you are still doing it?

(I hope you're okay with me writing this as a sequel to one of my other papyton fics! This could still be read on its own, but it will make more sense if you read the first chapter. If you don't want to, just know that the part in italics at the beginning is from a fanfic that Alphys wrote.)

The Greatest Fanfiction of All: The Sequel

Rating: T Word Count: 1687 Read on AO3: here

---

Papyrus’s hands are warm. Of course they are. Theyre always covered in gloves. Not even Mettaton, his boyfriend of one month and thirteen days, knows what his bony phalanges look like beneath the plush red fabric.

But tonight, that's going to change.

xxx

Exactly one month and thirteen days had passed since Mettaton had read the beginning of Alphys’s “papyton” fanfiction. It also happened to be one month and thirteen days since Papyrus had agreed to be his boyfriend, sending him on a magical journey of love and romance.

That journey had given him plenty of new perspectives and discoveries. Yet the mystery of what lie under Papryus’s gloves was not one of them.

He sat next to Mettaton on their usual bench at the center of the hedge maze. The sky was dark with stormclouds, which kept any stray spectators away from the park. Papyrus was prepared, as usual; a tall MTT-Brand Umbrella leaned against his femur. Nothing and no one would ruin this moment.

Now Mettaton just needed to have the moment. Preferably without resorting to calling Alphys and Frisk again.

“METTATON? IS SOMETHING THE MATTER?” Papyrus asked, his browbone furrowing in concern.

Mettaton’s fingers were already laced through his; Mettaton rubbed his thumb against the back of Papyrus’s glove.

“Well. It is a very special day, darling.” Special enough that Mettaton had worn the outfit Papyrus loved most—a cropped shirt that said COOL ROBOT and galaxy-print leggings that hugged his metallic thighs. Papyrus himself had worn a bright Tetris shirt and shorts that exposed his gleaming femurs.

“IT IS?” Papyrus blinked. “IS THERE A SALE ON RIGATONI? BECAUSE I THOUGHT THAT STARTED NEXT WEEK.”

“Hm? Oh—not that I know of, but I will keep that in mind.” He imagined creating a pasta bouquet for Papyrus, and a smile graced his lips. “Today is the one month and thirteen day anniversary of our glamorous romance.”

“WOWIE! TIME FLIES WHEN YOU’RE DATING A HOT ROBOT!” Papyrus grinned, pressing his teeth to Mettaton’s cheek in a close approximation of a kiss. “HAPPY ONE MONTH AND THIRTEEN DAYS, METTATON! IS THERE A SPECIAL WAY YOU WANT TO CELEBRATE?”

It was perfect. Mettaton couldn’t have set it up better if he tried.

“Actually…” He turned Papyrus’s hand over, examining every seam and stitch in his crimson glove. “I was hoping to see your hands. I know they’re just as handsome as the rest of you.”

He winked, and a light blush spread across Papyrus’s cheekbones.

“MY HANDS? I’D GLOVE TO! BUT, ERM…” His fingers disentangled from Mettatons, instead fidgeting nervously with the hem of his right glove. “I DON’T KNOW THAT YOU WOULD FIND THEM AS UNBEARABLY ATTRACTIVE AS THE REST OF ME.”

Coming from Papyrus, that was practically a statement of self-loathing. Guilt bubbled in Mettaton’s soul-tank.

“Beautiful.” He grasped the top of his boyfriend’s arms and squeezed them gently. “There is not a bone in your body that I would not find attractive. Of course, I will not ask you to perform if you are suffering stage fright, but I do think you shine so much brighter in the light.”

Papyrus smiled a little, though his browbone was still turned upward with worry.

"IF YOU'RE SURE…"

"Positive as my ratings, darling."

Papyrus nodded slowly. "I TRUST YOU, METTATON."

Those words were like ambrosia to Mettaton's soul. He would do anything to remain worthy of his boyfriend's trust.

"PLEASE, JUST… DON'T BE FRIGHTENED, ALRIGHT?"

Mettaton couldn't imagine anything about Papyrus being frightening.

Then, with agonizing care, Papyrus peeled off his gloves. And Mettaton understood.

The bones of his hands were scorched an ashen gray, nearly black. Hairline cracks laced through them like spiderwebs. Mettaton was half afraid that if he touched them, they would crumble to dust.

"I'M FINE, REALLY!" Papyrus must have noticed the look on his face, no matter how quickly Mettaton had schooled his expression. "THESE BURNS ARE SO OLD, I BARELY NOTICE THEY'RE THERE!"

His grin was strained. Mettaton wanted nothing more than to reach out and squeeze his hand, but he didn't dare.

"They don't hurt?" Mettaton asked, then winced. He could've phrased that more tactfully. It was probably better than asking how on earth the injury had happened, at least.

"WELL… THEY ARE A BIT SENSITIVE WITHOUT MY GLOVES. THEY HAVE HEALING MAGIC, YOU SEE." Papyrus held out one of his red gloves, his expression turning to one of pride. "SANS DID THE SEWING, AND I DID THE ENCHANTMENT."

"No wonder you love them so much." Mettaton smiled. It was adorable how much Papyrus loved his brother. Their love had inspired Mettaton to finally patch up his relationship with Blooky and Mew Mew.

Papyrus smiled back, running a charred fingertip fondly over the fabric. "WOULD YOU… LIKE TO TRY ONE ON?"

"Me?" Mettaton blinked.

"OF COURSE! WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO EXPERIENCE THE GREAT PAPYRUS'S LEGENDARY HEALING MAGIC FIRSTHAND?"

Mettaton chuckled at the pun. "How could I possibly refuse?"

He slipped off his white gloves, revealing the unsightly bolts in his own fingers. He hardly felt self-conscious about that after seeing Papyrus's hands, though.

Papyrus's glove fit like a dream. Like holding his hand, only from the inside. Warmth seeped from the fabric into his metal joints, slipping through his cracks like sweet oil.

"This is… quite the enchantment," he breathed.

Papyrus couldn’t be in pain with that much healing magic caressing his bones. But on the other hand, even the constant healing magic had failed to permanently erase the scars. Mettaton still wasn’t too familiar with physical injuries, but surely that wasn’t normal, right?

Papyrus’s wink sounded like magical glitter."WHAT CAN I SAY? I'M VERY ENCHANTING."

He looked just as bright as ever. Just as energetic, as full of life.

Just as beautiful, inside and out.

"That you are, darling." Mettaton kissed his cheek.

Papyrus pulled his left glove back onto his hand, then twined his fingers with Mettaton's. Red on red, warmth on warmth Their hands matched perfectly.

"YOU PROBABLY HAVE SOME QUESTIONS," Papyrus said quietly.

Mettaton's eye flickered to Papyrus's bare right hand before returning to his eyesockets.

"You don't have to tell me anything you don't feel comfortable with, darling."

Mettaton was curious of course. If this injury had been caused by another monster, they would face the wrath of a true killer robot. Knowing Papyrus, though, he had probably forgiven whoever was responsible.

"I ALWAYS FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH YOU." He smiled. "AND IT IS… NICE. TO HAVE SOMEONE BESIDES SANS KNOW THIS."

"No one else knows?" Mettaton’s eyes widened. He'd thought Undyne would have found out, whether Papyrus told her on purpose or she burned off his gloves during one of their cooking lessons.

"I AM A SKELETON OF MANY SECRETS." Papyrus winked again. This time it sounded like tinkling bells. "IT HELPS THAT NO ONE ELSE REMEMBERS THE ACCIDENT, THOUGH."

An accident. No one had hurt Papyrus on purpose.

Mettaton sighed in relief, powering down his killer robot protocols.

"I WAS HELPING MY DAD WITH HIS WORK ON THE CORE. I ALWAYS CALIBRATED THE PUZZLES WHILE HE CALIBRATED THE GEOTHERMAL POWER LEVELS."

Papyrus looked down at their tangled hands, his expression distant.

"I STILL DON'T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. ON THE DAYS SANS REMEMBERS, HE PROMISES THAT IT WASN'T MY FAULT. THAT DAD WAS TOO CARELESS. BUT THERE WAS AN EXPLOSION, AND DAD, HE… HE FELL…"

Something in Mettaton crushed as Papyrus's voice cracked.

"I WAS LUCKIER. THE BLAST ONLY GOT MY HANDS." The smile returned.

"Papyrus…"

Mettaton didn't know what to say. What could he say? Ghosts didn't have parents. His cousins were his family, but he couldn't imagine them dying, either. Blooky physically couldn't.

But this wasn't about him! It was about Papyrus, who had lost his father and scarred his hands and still counted himself lucky.

"DON'T BE SAD, METTATON. IT WAS A LONG TIME AGO. LONGER THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE."

Papyrus looked into his eyes, and for a moment, Mettaton saw something old. Mettaton had been alive—albeit as a ghost—for nearly two centuries. Right now, though, Mettaton wondered if Papyrus was even older than that.

"I suppose so,” he reluctantly admitted. “I don't even remember an explosion at the CORE."

"OH, THAT'S NORMAL. APPARENTLY DAD WAS RATHER FORGETTABLE." His smile was sad. "EVEN SANS DOESN'T ALWAYS REMEMBER HIM. BUT I… WELL."

He closed his blackened fist.

"IT WOULD BE DIFFICULT TO FORGET."

Mettaton opened his mouth, but no sound came out. Luckily, it didn’t seem like Papyrus was looking for a response.

“WHEW! ALL THIS HONESTY IS EXHAUSTING!!” Sweat beaded on his skull. “DO YOU WANT TO GO GET NICE CREAMS?”

“Of course, darling, but—are you sure that you’re okay?” Mettaton couldn’t help the concern in his voice. It wasn’t every day that he unlocked his boyfriend’s tragic backstory.

And here he’d been so concerned about something as trivial as holding hands. He truly was as selfish as everyone believed.

“PLEASE, DON’T WORRY ABOUT ME,” Papyrus said firmly. His hand gave Mettaton’s a tight squeeze. “I MEANT IT WHEN I SAID IT WAS LONG AGO. PRACTICALLY A DIFFERENT LIFETIME. I ONLY TOLD YOU SO THAT YOU WOULD KNOW HOW MUCH I TRUST YOU.”

Trust. Mettaton trusted Papyrus, too. Trusted that he didn’t need Mettaton to coddle him. Trusted that if he wanted Mettaton’s help, he would ask for it.

“I… thank you, darling.” Ghostly tears welled in his eyes. “Your trust means everything to me.”

“WELL THEN!” Papyrus’s grin turned mischievous. “I TRUST YOU TO KISS ME UNTIL I CAN’T BREATHE!”

Mettaton’s fans whirred and whirred. The sound was quickly drowned out by the raindrops that began to fall and fizzle on his shoulder pads.

“Darling, you’re a skeleton. You don’t have lungs.”

“NEITHER DO YOU.” Papyrus twirled the umbrella before popping it open, protecting Mettaton from the threat of short-circuiting.

(From the rain, at least.)

“You truly know how to give me a challenge, darling.” Mettaton cuddled closer, reaching up to brush his red-gloved hand against Papyrus’s cheekbone.

“ONLY BECAUSE I KNOW YOU’LL RISE TO IT!”

Mettaton grinned back, and that was exactly what he did.

#fic tag #prompt requests #papyton #tali writes #papyrus #mettaton

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bthump · 3 years ago

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I wanted to touch on the whole gutsca thing with someone (I know zero people in this fandom so you're my lucky pick!). Am I alone in feeling like their first time together came out of no where? My meta with Guts is that he was not at all comfortable with sex at that time of his life (this instance being his first time [outside of the rape he experienced as a child]). His choice of words too, "here I go", translated to me like someone only doing what they felt was expected of them rather than something he was yearning for. He clearly wasn't even ready given how rough he was and how he regressed and attacked her. This moment seemed very forced and almost rang to me like Kentaro's declaration of "no homo though". I would be curious to know how Kentaro felt about homosexuality (bisexuality, etc) and if he ever addressed the ever blatant gay tension and romantic-non-platonic-love blossoming between Guts and Griffith pre-eclipse. I do get the sense that this may be a case of severe queer baiting or perhaps a PSA against gay love altogether ("falling for a man will literally destroy you and send you and everyone you love to hell" type of message); but I'm a very jaded person so I hope to be proven wrong. Sigh, my point being Gutsca seems pretty dang forced and empty of true development. I buy them more as besties than anything romantic. Especially since both he and Casca are actually in love with Griffith (what a fucking triangle!). Does anyone in fandom have any opinions on the sad possibility of this whole beautiful and ultimately tragic love between Griffith and Guts actually being a fucked up anti-gay PSA? Are there any interviews with Kentaro shooting this theory down so I can stop being sad and bitter about it? What are your thoughts?

Thanks for sending this, I'm definitely down to talk about it! I hope you connect with more people in the fandom but don’t worry about sending random asks even if you do lol.

Anyway you’re definitely not alone. I have a lot of thoughts on Guts and Casca's hook up, and they're all pretty much "it feels really forced and not particularly romantic but I think you can argue that that's deliberate" lol. For instance I discuss in a lot of detail here how various aspects of the scene indicate that Guts and Casca having sex is shown to be a case of both of them rebounding from Griffith and sort of giving to each other what they were unable or failed to give to him.

And I talk a lot about how Judeau essentially orchestrates it all and what that suggests about Guts and Casca's relationship here.

And lol sorry for all the links but also this post is about how their relationship feels one-sided to an extent and is used to illuminate a lot of Guts' flaws, using Judeau as a comparison point.

Oh shit and also one more lol, here's a comparison between the sex scene and Griffith's with Charlotte that suggests that both start as ways for the dudes to repress their feelings.

(Don't feel obligated to read all those posts if you don't want, you should get the gist of what I'm saying w/ those descriptions.)

But yeah basically I do think that Guts and Casca getting together felt forced and awkward. At best it might be intended to be seen that way, as two friends hooking up awkwardly in an emotionally intense moment but probably doomed to failure because neither of them are ready for a relationship with the other, or particularly interested in one deep down, once they finished "licking wounds." At worst it’s just bad writing lol. But again like I think there are good arguments for the former.

I also totally agree that their relationship has a strong vibe of doing what's expected. Like for real, at least to me both Guts and Casca read so easily as gay and repressed lol. Casca talks about her feelings for Griffith in terms of “he was a boy she was a girl can I make it any more obvious”

and I can’t help but see it as Casca like, wow I have strong feelings towards Griffith, he’s a man and I’m a woman, so clearly these feelings must be romantic, there’s no other option. Then when she has sex with Guts she keeps contextualizing it essentially as repayment for Guts saving her, like she owes him. “I too want a wound I can say you gave me.” “Not just being given to... maybe I can give something as well.” Which just doesn’t make her desire for him look all that genuine lol.

And then you have Guts. The way he tells Casca that from the start only her touch was okay with him after he has sex with her, referencing the scene when he wakes up with her on top of him and starts to panic before realizing she’s a woman, is soooo suggestive of repression to me. Like, first off because it’s incorrect, he was also okay with Griffith going in for a face-grab after winning a duel Guts had been projecting his rape trauma all over, which seems like a pretty conspicuous omission. And secondly because the reason he was okay with Casca’s touch specifically is solely because she’s a woman, not because she’s special or because they have a magic romantic connection - it’s because she’s not a man. To me that just screams that Guts was open to sex with Casca because she’s the only woman he knows, and he’s afraid of the idea of physical intimacy with men, regardless of what he might actually want deep down.

So yeah that’s basically how I feel about Guts and Casca’s relationship, strong agree with you.

When it comes to Miura’s intent, I can tell you that Miura was asked about the subtext in an interview once, back in 2000, and he responded with something along the lines of ‘two men can have passionate feelings for each other without it being romantic.’ The interview is here, but this is a paraphrase the translator mentioned in the comments.

Other than that I’ve never seen him address it directly, but on the flipside he has cited several textually gay stories as inspiration (off the top of my head: Kaze to Ki no Uta, Devilman, Guin Saga, mangaka Moto Hagio in general), and he has straightforwardly said that the (magical intersex) central character of his other work, Duranki, was intended to have romances with both male and female love interests. Also people tell me there are strong griffguts vibes with the main, presumably canon or intended-to-be-canon ship there. So there’s that lol.

As for the no homo aspect and the potential homophobia in the griffguts subtext... I can’t deny I’ve also considered the idea that it’s a deliberate anti-gay PSA (though I haven’t seen anyone else address the idea as far as I remember, and I’ve only briefly mentioned it offhandedly). Like, Guts and Griffith’s relationship turns bad because they’re both too invested in each other, maybe the barely-subtextual desire is meant to look like a sinister twisting of pure platonic feelings that ruins everything, if Griffith hadn’t loved him the Eclipse never would have happened, etc.

But honestly I don’t think that reading holds up compared to a much more positive reading of their feelings, in which it’s their failure to understand them and act on them, thanks largely to formative childhood trauma and self-hatred, that leads to tragedy.

I don’t know what Miura intended, and there certainly are aspects of the story that are homophobic regardless of his intent, even if my best-faith reading is entirely correct, like the only textual gay attraction being pedophiles and over the top heretic orgies lol, or yk, Guts and Griffith both assaulting the same woman while looking at/thinking about the other in a very sexually charged way.

But the reading of their relationship where it’s positive and good for both of them, even including sexual desire, and only gets fucked up because they both incorrectly think their feelings are unrequited is legitimately so weirdly strong, much stronger than a reading where the sexual nature of their feelings is what fucks everything up, so I’m pretty happy just rolling with that take.

And as much as Casca can be seen and may very well be intended as a no homo, it’s also very easy for me to read her relationships with both as less of a hopeful opportunity for positive heterosexual romance and more of a “here’s how repressing your feelings thru attempts at heterosexuality fucks you up” PSA lol. Griffith and Charlotte too, for that matter. It’s definitely a stretch to think that’s intended, but whether it’s intended or not it’s an easy sell for me and I’m fine with not really worrying too much about possible authorial intent there.

Finally, I also want to link this post that goes pretty thoroughly into why I interpret griffguts as very positive rather than as a cautionary tale or predatory gay lust etc

And also have this shorter post about Femto on the same subject too, why not

Oh and maybe this thing where I split hairs about Guts’ lust for Griffith and desire for revenge to make a point that the homoeroticism isn’t necessarily being equated with violence by the narrative lol

#ask #a #b #anonymous #theme: repression #theme: homoeroticism #interviews #ship: griffguts #ship: gtsca #theme: homophobia #theme: heteronormativity

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yukiwhitetm · 3 years ago

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Thoughts on Life is Strange: True Colors and Wavelengths

This part of the review contains no spoilers.

Chapter One

This chapter was an excellent introduction to Alex Chen, her brother, Gabe, and the rest of the Haven Springs community. Steph and Ryan, our two romance options, were introduced with equal value - Steph was super cool and Ryan was super cute. Every character was well rounded and likeable, but the game was glitchy, hard to run and no one’s mouth moved with their speech - this improved in later chapters after the October update. The worst glitch was on Alex when she suddenly turned entirely black during an animation, but that went away quickly and may have been resolved in the October update. I had to adjust my settings several times to get the game to run smoothly! Windowed mode is your saviour here.

Chapter Two

This chapter could have been done better. It was OK. But it could have been impactful and emotional, and it just... wasn’t. I will talk about it more in the spoilers part of this review. There was a hilarious glitch where the bartender, Jed, T-posed when he wasn’t even supposed to be in the room. I laughed so hard.

Chapter Three

My favourite chapter by far! This chapter was fun and enjoyable - and then it was intense and emotional. I am so glad that they fleshed out Gabe’s girlfriend, Charlotte, more here as she had seemed bland before. I am concerned about how they did it, but I will talk about that in the spoiler part of this review.

Chapter Four

Fun and optional romance was abound in this chapter! The event was enjoyable and the romance so sweet that it made me smile. But it had a shocking conclusion. I literally clasped my hands over my mouth and gasped!

Chapter Five

Remember how in the first game Max had visions of alternate futures and alternate versions of herself and it got really crazy for awhile there? Well, it happened again here! But it made tons more sense and I actually enjoyed unravelling it all. True Colors came to a decisive end as the mysteries were brought to a satisfying, if tragic, conclusion.

Wavelengths

This expansion pack was long! It was as long as a chapter of the game - so grab a warm drink and get comfy. In this, we followed Steph as she started her new job as a DJ and shop assistant in Haven Springs and slowly, bit by bit, moved on from the grief and trauma of what happened at Arcadia Bay. It impacted her more than we ever thought it did and she really struggled for awhile. You see the DJ booth and the music shop change over time as she settled in and got her life in order. Steph grew to become the Steph we knew in the game, and we got to see it happen. (Side note, I had a serious glitch occur when she entered the back room at one point, and had to restart from a previous check point three times. Hopefully, this will be ironed out with time.)

To read a more in depth review carry on, but beware the blatant spoilers below!

This part of the review contains spoilers and, honestly, this is where the critique comes in.

Chapter One

I like that this chapter started with Alex talking to her therapist because it introduces us to the main character, and it is then tied into the start of the last chapter. I appreciate that there was foreshadowing put in place by Ethan telling Alex that he wanted to go up and into the mountains that day, and by the signs of the upcoming explosions that were literally everywhere, but it ruined the experience for me. I predicted the entire thing before it happened and was frustrated that I couldn’t stop something so obvious from happening. It happened and I could have stopped it because I saw it miles out, but the game wouldn’t let me. So much for player’s choice. Also, I think that Riley’s hair could have done with being animated better as it looked not-quite-right throughout the game. And, I hate to say this, but Gabe’s death was more funny than it should have been. I mean, it was upsetting, yes, but I knew it was going to happen because of the trailers, so I did not miss the hilarity of the animation of this one random boulder just hitting Gabe in the stomach and throwing him off the mountain. I think that could have been animated better.

Chapter Two

This chapter started with a memorial for Gabe. I cried really hard during this part and had to restart the scene to watch it clearly. Then we helped Steph deal with her grief in a scene that was beautiful and well done. Steph’s eyebrows kept on disappearing, though, which made me giggle. Alex helped Charlotte support Ethan, and she helped Ryan with his grief and guilt. The scene with Ryan was brilliant too - and his following joy random but sweet. My critique here is this - where was Alex’s grief? It was her brother that died right in front of her and yet we did not see her grieve him, not really. And I get that it was mentioned in Chapter Five that she never cries, but still. Her voice was too level and her expression too clear and it really did not seem as though it had only been two weeks since her brother had died, I repeat, right in front of her. The entire chapter was about grief and mourning, but not about hers. She did start to see her empathy as something she can use to help other people and that’s great, but what about her emotions, where were they?

Alex’s watered down emotions were why this chapter was only an OK. Alex is the main character - so her emotions matter the most.

Chapter Three

I cannot put into words how much I loved this chapter. The LARP was so inspired and fun - I enjoyed every moment of it. And the way that Ethan’s Joy transformed the LARP into a real fantasy world was wonderful, followed on by how it was torn apart by his grief. After this came a scene with Charlotte where we finally got to see her grief - and it had manifested as anger, which is one of the five stages of grief. The option to take away her anger was an interesting choice to make, if an intrusive one. She had the right to her emotions. But! My concern is this - Charlotte is a black woman and the writers made her angry, so are they perpetuating the ‘angry black woman’ stereotype? Or are they allowing her the right to be angry in her grief despite the stereotype? I just think that this is such a sensitive topic that it would have been better if they had swapped her anger with another character’s sadness - like Steph’s or Ryan’s - so that this topic could have been entirely avoided. But maybe I am wrong here.

Chapter Four

I loved the Spring Festival! It was so much fun exploring it all and talking to all of the characters! My favourite part was the giving of a rose to your romantic interest - I loved how this made it clear to the game who you were interested in, as I was a bit concerned I would end up with Ryan when I had been gunning for Steph. (I just think dating your brother’s best friend is kind of weird.) The rooftop scene between Steph and Alex was adorable and I was so happy to finally see them kiss! Pike arresting Alex was not unexpected, because he had always seemed wishy-washy, but upsetting. The fact that she and her friends had been spied on was unnerving, but I should have seen that coming after what happened with Mac. Taking Pike’s fear away seemed contradictory to her thoughts on how taking Charlotte’s anger away was intrusive, but it was the only option other than signing the paper, which I was not going to do, so I did it. Jed’s betrayal was shocking. I did not expect that at all! And that Alex was shot and fell down a mine shaft from the impact was terrifying. What if she had died?

Chapter Five

This chapter started with Alex talking to her therapist again, and I love that it tied into the beginning of the game. The following mystery was fun to solve, and the magical memory explorations with Gabe were interesting to explore as we got to see more of their shared past. I actually really liked it! I was cheering Alex on as she made her way out of the mine, but I nearly cried when she found her mother’s locket down there. The final showdown between her and Jed was impactful and emotional like I had hoped chapter two to be, and I am glad that I managed to garner every character’s support. Jed admitted to his crimes and I... I forgave him. Not for him, but for Alex, because she deserved to move on from what happened. I chose to stay in Haven Springs with Steph, because it seemed like the game wanted me to do that (as I had learned from the first game that Life is Strange tends to have a ‘favourite’ ending that is more fleshed out) but I actually wanted them to leave. It didn’t seem healthy to me for her stay in the place that her father, brother and almost her had been murdered. Despite this, I found the ending to be... lacklustre. Gabe’s description of her future in Haven Springs was beautiful, but I would have liked to see that after I made the choice not before - because after I made the choice all I got to see was Alex walking to Haven Springs, which I had seen several times before, and then roll credits. If I had known that I wouldn’t have seen anything different I would have let Alex and Steph move on with their lives.

Overall, Life is Strange: True Colors is a great game! I would not say it is as good as Life is Strange was, but it is far better than Life is Strange 2, because it had a cohesive story with an overarching plot, likeable characters and a mystery to solve.

#life is strange #life is strange true colors #true colors #life is strange wavelengths #lis #listc #lis true colors #review #video game review #game review #story review #glitches #thoughts #random thoughts

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chocolateslatte · 5 years ago

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🚨The Rise of Skywalker Detailed Review and Spoilers Ahead🚨

George Lucas: “If the boy and girl walk off into the sunset hand-in-hand in the last scene, it adds 10 million to the box office”

The “fairytale” we got: A long long time ago in a galaxy far far away, there was a curse of pain and death in a family that just went on and on. They were never able to break it and they all die, the end.

Well, you did it JJ, you little punk...you ruined 40 years of cinema. Kids are coming out of theatres crying, they can’t understand. I guess this was the “fun and hopeful ending” you were speaking of during the press tours. Are you on crack or something, or just sadistic....why would you promote it like that!? Did you forget Star Wars at its core is a story of hope, light, a fairytale in space for children? They did it...they united Reylo’s and Fanboys through hate.

JJ you do realize tragical romances are only tragically romantic if there was romantic buildup? Romeo and Juliet married in secret, Anidala did as well and flirted in the fields. How was this supposed to be satisfying? A five-second beginning, middle, and end. How this went through multiple execs is beyond me.... I would have understood if Reylo was Rian’s creation. BUT JJ LITERALLY was the one who told Rian to go forth with it...he created Reylo so you can’t say the last Jedi derailed things on that front. JJ wasn’t brave enough for his own vision. This movie was like “the crimes of Grindlewald”, a lot of stuff happening that made me feel nothing.

Okay, first things first. The OG trilogy was necessary, the prequels were necessary to set up that Vader did not start off bad. What was necessary about the sequels? They just dismantled everything the Skywalker family worked for. Why did we have to see ALL of our favorite characters die? Was the aim that a villain can only be redeemed through death? How original. I’m convinced what they were planning for since force awakens was a journey from villain to hero...but instead we got this a 10min redemption resulting in death a la Vader. Why call Adam Driver’s character a “Disney Prince”?When did Happy endings become so controversial? We go to the movies to feel hope, to escape reality...George Lucas understood that. JJ’s trilogy is uninspired, bland and contributes nothing to the saga. JJ went as far as to recon his own “The Force Awakens”.It had the chance to define generations but no. Literal and utter garbage. Rian made some odd choices but he was bold, unafraid and had the vision. HE knew emotion was at the heart of Star Wars.

WHERE DID THE SKYWALKERS RISE? MORE LIKE RISE OF PALPATINE, HE BLOODY WON

BUT my problem is not with the ending, it’s the bloody entire movie. This movie made me realize that it's not Reylo that I am a fan of, it was Ben, Leia, Han, Ani, Padme, and all those other characters. I’m upset because this movie is not my Star Wars: of family, love and above all else hope. This is just a 2.5-hour video game with no emotions. This trilogy was all angst with NO payoff.

Okay, you will never ever convince me Palpatine was planned the whole time. This whole movie was retcon for the Last Jedi that pissed off the fanboys. Lucas films did not have an outline for the three films and Rian derailed whatever they wanted to do....except they didn’t even tell him what they wanted! This should be a cautionary tale of why you need to plan. Kylo ain’t bad, Snoke is gone....well pull out Palpatine I guess. This whole film is JJ’s mad scrambling. Alright, I will humor you, tell me how Palpatine came back when he fell down a shaft and exploded....not *boom boom because of force*. The force in this movie is not canon George Lucas force, it’s just an easy out whenever JJ wants one.

1. Opening Crawl: As soon as I saw this I knew all the leaks were true, I wanted to bolt from the theatre. When I saw them in August I laughed cause it was so ridiculous it couldn’t be true. How could Disney let a whole movie leak? The plot seemed like a bad fan-fiction. Actually, fanfics are way more true to lore. Anyway, so Palpatine “announces” that he’s back. Is this the shrewd Chancellor Palpatine we know? Certainly, not...why in the world would he announce it rather than keep on the DL and just attack. Yo Palps ain’t this dumb why would you let them (the resistance) prepare?? Because of plot...well okay.

2. Did Last Jedi even happen: this film is the sequel to the force awakens, like TLJ never happened...except it’s acting like there was some movie in between that JJ made. Okay, so why is Kylo trying to run Rey over with his tie fighter...he doesn’t really want to kill her. It’s just meaningless action shots. And don’t get me started on exposition, the dialogue: “hey look its the Knights of Ren”. Except they do nothing. Cool cool. Kylo’s character goes back to Force awakens era like no development had occurred...except he’s not even there he’s just messing around not even being a real villain. JJ’s specialty is set-up and he does this beautifully....but he can not wrap up and follow through.

3. Rose Tico: yup last Jedi never happened, she has nothing to do. She and Finn are irrelevant. Finn has reverted to being obsessed with Rey. Cool Cool. I honestly feel so bad for the lovely Kelly Marie Tran. How did you relegate a relatively big character into the sidelines?? Why introduce two new characters this late. Rose could have filmed in for them...but alas we must snub Rian at every turn because that’s just how petty JJ Abrams is. ( don’t get me wrong Jannah was cool)

4. The Rise Of Poe Dameron: Finn has been relegated to a side character who does nothing and just yells “REY!”. It was a great setup, a stormtrooper who was force sensitive but doesn’t want his life to be fighting for nothing. You could have explored trauma, the discovery of the light but nope nada. Tell me the point of his character journey. So flat and static. And with Jannah and the ex stormtroopers they could have gone with the arc of these lost, sad kids coming together to find family.

5. Leia: Okay you’re telling me our Princess would give up on her son before he was born, just throw away her lightsaber and accept Ben’s fate? Cool alright. And she knew about Rey Palpatine and didn’t say anything...my princess would never.

6. Mary Sue Rey: Ahh Rey this girl feels no emotion in this movie...just like the audience. Sure she’s trained but she can just do stuff with the “force” that even Jedi masters can’t. Stopping a whole starship, something even Yoda could barely do...yup she can do it. Beat Kylo all the time except one, yup she can. Manipulate the force in mind-boggling ways, heal people...sure Luke couldn’t but Rey certainly can. Cause she is the chosen one...hell even Ani wasn’t this talented and he had years of training. Poe and Finn have a genuine connection, Rey just seems disjointed (totally understandable why)...but if so the ending is even worse. She doesn’t even find peace with her friends. She’s not realistic and human like Luke and Leia were.

Force sensitivity in the galaxy: What a perfect setup, the boy with the broom at the end of TLJ that was force sensitive. The message is that the power to use the force was spreading through the galaxy. No longer confined to the elite. People were hearing of Luke’s battle of Crate and rising.

7. Kylo/Ben: I still maintain that he, other than Ani was the most nuanced character in the whole saga. His arc from Force Awakens to Last Jedi had progressed. How great that even someone from the legendary line of skywalker and solo could fall to the dark again. He wasn’t flat, he was a tortured boy that was conflicted since the first movie. How great would it have been to see him as a conflicted supreme leader, which was set up in TLJ. But *gasps* a plot of his very own, no can do, this is the nature of JJ’s crush on Rey and Daisy.

Disney released comics that made us sympathize with him, to see that all along he was manipulated by Snoke, and Palpatine the voices in his head. Neglected by those who were supposed to love him. Adam Driver was cast perfectly, he had almost no lines that weren’t related to Rey’s charcater arc. If he were a woman I’m sure everyone would be offended. That single line’s delivery “Dad-”

Come on Poe had more lines than him, and Driver according to JJ was half of the protagonist. He was pitched an arc opposite that of Darth Vader that’s why he signed. Man JJ really did do everyone dirty.

8. Ben had no lines while redeemed other than “ow”...I am so sorry ADAM that this nasty ass JJ did this to you...this part was 100% improv by Adam, I am willing to bet my life on it. You know why “ow” was brilliant? Cause it meant he felt pain and emotion, he was no longer hiding behind the hardness of Kylo REN. Adam’s performance as Ben left me speechless, he was convincing as Kylo, intimidating...but as BEN he shines in the way only Solo’s can. The way his eyes become determined once he accepts he must give his life, and he does so happily for the love of his life. His soulmate. Star Wars and JJ never deserved the talent that is Adam Driver.

9. They are supposed to be equals in the force yet they missed the opportunity to fight Snoke together. Tell me how they are equals. He existed only to further Rey’s plotline.

Oh and the other Jedi including Anakin whisper and help Rey...when his own grandson has been asking for help in distress for like 30years. Nice real nice.

10. Finally Reylo: it felt unearned cause there was no buildup, JJ just threw it in for kicks forgetting all the P&P parallels he was shooting for. An afterthought. Driver and Ridley’s acting saved the day, they had no lines. Adam Driver is truly one of the finest actors. You could see the difference between Ben and Kylo in his subtle gestures...the sass was pure Han Solo.

11. And then the death: I wouldn’t even say we won, but at what cost. We won in no way. Had he died fighting I would have understood, but this death was so unnecessary and put in just for the fanboys. Let me say again I would have been okay with death had it been justified. How is this any different than Vader x Luke. JJ can only copy not create. How crazy that you can just bring people back from the dead...Anakin is here like, am I joke to you? I could have brought Padme back say what???? What was the point of his whole fall to the dark. The force is infinite, that’s the whole point...once you know how to use it you can’t run out of it like juice. Oh, and Ben did not become one with Rey but rather the Force according to the Disney website. So why pray tell did he not appear as a force ghost? I’m convinced JJ was on crack.

12. No Mourning BEN no acknowledgment: 5 seconds! And then she moves on from losing her soulmate, half of her soul. She loses it over Chewie but nothing, no emotion not even a second over her other half. Seriously? No one ever knows Ben came back...nada. JJ set up Reylo, time and time again he has said that he crafted the story around the romance. He was left scrambling after Last Jedi and this was a last-ditch shock ending. No Reylo theme song, no across the stars

13. Last Jedi told us you don’t have to come from a powerful family to be important. THE WHOLE thing was that you could be force-sensitive and be a nobody. Nobodies can become somebody. A Hero is not born but made. The force lives in all beings, not just powerful families. It inspired me, what a great message to young guys and gals. Kylo’s line, “you come from nothing, you are nothing...you have no place in this story” finally turns out true. You have to come from something to have a part in the Star Wars story. And Rey had darkness inside her cause she was human. Because none of us are pure, we are shades of grey. But no, it’s cause darkness only runs in families. In the Last Jedi when she wants to see her family all she sees is herself and a shadow (Ben) who joins with her. Please do explain this JJ. And if this granddaughter thing was set up I would have had no problem...but they pulled it from their asses. You can have nothing but mean something. But no pander to the fanboys. In the end, a Palpatine lived and all the skywalkers ended....and we are supposed to have hope. Palpatine really did win.

14. Rey’s biggest fear was ending up in the desert alone, we were told “the belonging she seeks is ahead not behind” and “there’s someone who could still come back”. They mentioned she felt just as alone with the resistance. Only the other half of her soul understood her. This is truly tragic and sad...I am so heartbroken for her. And don’t tell me she isn’t there to stay...the soundtrack is called “a new home”. Enjoy the rest of your days being exactly where you started Rey....but hey at least you got a droid boo. I’m convinced this is not the balance JJ envisioned in the first movie. At one point in TFA Rey looks up sees an old woman alone, scavenging in the desert. This rattles her to the core and it starts her journey of wanting a better, different life. I am so sorry Rey. Okay so you may say she has the resistance and her friends...but let’s consult the last Jedi. In the end when everyone is on the ship...Rey is surrounded by friends yet looks more alone than ever. No one but Ben, maybe Luke, Leia, and Han understood her pull to the dark.

How sad that these two hopeless souls who had never known a moment of belonging and true love, found it for all but a few seconds.

I will quote: “preventing female characters with strong, compelling narratives from experiencing love, intimacy, and affection is just as regressive as reducing them down to sexual accessories. Assumes that women must choose between a romantic interest and depth of character”

Men really can not write good female characters, can they? A woman really can’t be a badass and end up with the love of her life

15. The Skywalker’s and Redemption: How truly truly sad that Han and Leia gave their life for their son who also died at a young age. ALL the Skywalkers and Solo’s have a tragic end. This is not what George Lucas wanted. What a tragic way to end this saga...they weren't able to break the curse. AND to all those troubled kids out there that lashed out and made terrible mistakes in their youth....doesn’t matter what you do dying is the only way out. You could have exiled him, made him pay in other ways. Nothing can be done to make up for your sins but death, no amount of good means that you can come home. To the young boys that get wrapped up in terror organizations, sorry the only way you can be redeemed is death...don’t bother changing and coming back. They could have exiled him, had him start an academy with Rey for Jedi kids. He could have spent the rest of his days redeeming himself. Why tell us he was literally preyed upon, haunted, and manipulated as a child. Even in a fantasy world, a victim of mental illness and abuse can not catch a break. Ben as a child could not fall asleep due to the demon-like voices in his mind. Everyone abandoned him in his time of need. Ben never desired power like Anakin, he went over to the dark because “the voice” of his grandfather promised belonging. I am shocked that this is the message Disney sends us. Oh and yeah you can totally take on the Skywalker name for kicks...the disrespect I swear

16. The worst bit is that I am 90% sure there was another ending that was scrapped. There was a promo shot of Jannah in a field, soft lighting, lush planet. It was exactly like P&P. Daisy Ridley said the lasts scene was known to only Her, Jannah on that panel (Driver was away). Convinced Jannah was looking at Rey and Ben starting a new life away from the desert which she and Luke hate so much. Hence the production of “A New Home” soundtrack. Hence why the “Farewell” song played behind Reylo kiss was hopeful. Why Luke’s soundtrack when he became part of the force was not triumphant. Why the death scene was sudden and cut weird and no sorrow from Rey. CAUSE THEY SCRAPPED THE ORIGINAL ENDING LAST MINUTE. Everyone knows JJ was still editing one month before. The concept art which was supposed to be released this month has been pushed to March. Why you ask? They need to remove the pages with a happy ending. He just didn’t have the guts, pandered to everyone and yet no one. He was successful in creating a beautifully filmed action-filled movie with none of the heart of Star Wars.

And then she goes and buries Anakin’s saber on freaking TATOOINE. He HATES Sand and Luke wanted to get away from there as soon as possible. Of course, a Palpatine would torture them that way. But nostalgia is the cash cow so. JJ can only generate nostalgia, not create original stories. IF he had any creativity she would have buried it at Padme’s grave.

The fanboys say “leave the romance for the romance movies”....have you seen the original trilogy or the prequels? Star Wars has always had hope and romance entwined with it.

SO AFTER 40 YEARS...PALPATINE WINS...HIS BLOODLINE LIVES ON

...and people thought the prequels were bad

JJ you also said that your goal was for people to come out of the movie feeling more hopeful and happy then they went in...yet here I am. My roommate literally had to console me and buy me ice cream. I am just so numb. I am sure the casual fan will enjoy this, as seen from the rotten tomatoes ratings. I think the critics were too generous with this one,

Star Wars is very simple at its core, Good vs Bad and Dark vs Light. The kids are expected to understand that a Palpatine being the only one who lives is hopeful? That is the conclusion of three generations of Skywalker sacrifice...

This is how the Skywalkers are remembered...In Tragedy and Curse??

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shreddedleopard · 4 years ago

Text

Twelve-million more reasons Historia and Levi are part of the Endgame. With Pictures.

You can read the first post I made on this here:

10 reasons it would make narrative sense for Levi and Historia’s character arcs to end together.

(This is the mega-evolved version.)

Okay, I’m going to put this out there now, and before you judge me, please just read the posts. You don’t have to agree. This is just an idea. But it makes a stupid amount of sense, at least to me. So here's your fair warning (and now I'm being bold): If you don’t want to potentially be spoiled, Do Not Read On.

Here’s the Theory:

Historia Reiss will give birth to a half-Ackerman child, and together with Levi, from the ashes and ruins of the world Eren destroyed, they will welcome the dawn of a new age for humanity, where Ymir’s curse and the power of the Titans is extinct.

I know. I sound like some crazy, Rivahisu nut. Granted, I am, but I’m not mad enough to make a claim like this without a shit-ton of evidence, because it’s such a damn twist it feels like it can’t be true. But just humour me.

Here’s the theory, then we’ll look at why it makes sense and how it might have been foreshadowed. Please note: I have less clue how this will tie in to Eremika endgame, so I haven’t mentioned this as much, but obviously that will be the other very important side of this coin.

10 months ago (In Japan, full term pregnancy is counted as 10 months), at the banquet celebrating completion of the new railroad, Levi and Historia, having had 3 and a bit years to bond over their shared experiences and become close, may have gotten carried away together and shared one night of being a bit more than friends. She’s well into her 18th year at this point, just to clear that up. This resulted in Historia getting pregnant. Okay just stay with me; I know. I know. I sound crazy. But hear me out. So this pregnancy, contrary to the belief of the MPs and rest of the damn world, was the complete opposite of planned. Historia tells Levi, and Levi immediately panics. Because, to steal Kenny’s famous line, Levi thinks to himself ‘I can’t be some kid’s dad.’

Levi does what he always does best, and shuts down into business mode, telling Historia she will need to cover it up somehow. Historia does as he asks, probably reluctantly, because she really has developed very deep feelings for him during the timeskip, and finds some farm hand to take the blame, likely saying she made a silly mistake with some random and the father doesn’t want anything to do with the child, and so she needs a father for the child not to be illegitimate. Which is her worst nightmare, because of course, that’s what she was. Levi watches the exchange hidden in that famous hood, feeling very conflicted, because although he cares about her, he thinks it best if no one knows that it was him that got the Queen pregnant, and of course, he’s duty bound, with a vow to fulfil, so he has no time to be worrying about a family. (Silly Levi!)

How ironic this conversation would be if this theory were true. Remember, Historia was completely willing to eat Zeke if needed. Instead, she got pregnant, unplanned, nothing to do with any plot or selfish wishes, just the result of a spontaneous act of love by two people who’ve grown to care for one another a lot. ANYWAY.

Because we know Levi actually has a good heart, he feels immensely guilty for all of this; he's just a product of his upbringing and thinks he doesn’t know the first thing about families, so it's better for all involved if he not be. See where this is going? The old cursed history repeating? Making the same mistakes as our parents? Plus, Levi is bound by his duty. He is incredibly important to the military still, and he cannot just abandon this for any of his own selfish wishes. He’s supposed to be the one to vanquish the beast titan.

Cue ten months of Historia looking hella depressed and hopeless, and Levi being even more of an asshole than usual to everyone, and not really wanting to say too much at all, as well as making some terrible workplace decisions (lol) poor boy be distracted.

Look at his face 😭

Yes Levi. A month. Which means Historia is now due and you’re still stuck with beardy, without a solution and pretty soon no reason for the MPs not to turn the mother of your child into a Titan.

That’s what that face is. I thought he looked a bit weird first time I read these panels 🤔 He didn’t know about the wine. We see that later. Anyway, I keep getting distracted, stop. I’ll come back to this.

But fear not; Levi will have a choice to make.

So this is where it gets a bit more iffy for me, because I'm not sure how it would work, so this could be a way off, BUT. I believe it will come to light that the combination of Royal and Ackerman genes will somehow cancel out a person’s ability to turn into a titan and connection through paths, thus making them truly ‘free.’

The founding titan has the ability to change Eldian physiology, according to what Zeke learned from professor Xavier.

EDIT: Okay so here’s where I’ve had to tweak this a bit in light of there latest chapter. So we just had Zeke in PATHS. With none other than our second resident genius, and as proclaimed by Eren, the saviour of humanity: Armin. What do our boys have a conversation about? Reproduction and the importance of the small moments in life - it’s these little moments which matter, regardless of the desire or need to recreate. Interesting how both the leaf and baseball link back to what their ideas of ‘family’ became. If Historia and Levi were to be in the same scenario in PATHS, what would their items be? What truly means family to them both?

Perhaps Armin and Zeke realise what is needed to lift the curse of the titans - maybe a blueprint for genes which can cancel out the connection to PATHS and the founder? If only they had a child with a new type of Royal-Ackerman DNA which might fit the bill ...

Here’s Levi’s moment. He, with Historia, has created such a child - completely by accident, because of one of those ‘moments’ that both Armin and Zeke mention - moments that are simply just about enjoying what you have with no sense of how it might relate to anything bigger - a real rarity for both of them, considering their roles and constantly being asked to think about the good of humanity as a whole. What a beautiful irony, that in the moment they chose to be selfish and, to use freckled Ymir’s own words, really live for themselves, they set a chain reaction in motion that would ultimately save humanity.

Where does this leave Eren and Mikasa? Good question. I believe Eren will die once the curse is removed, because tragically he is the character that has been forced to choose humanity over his own personal relationships. As Isayama has said before, Eren is a victim of the story. Mikasa will be the last thing he sees, hence the original dream at the start of the manga, where he wakes up crying. Something like this. But probably a lot better. Yeah.

Out of the ashes of the old world, a new one will be built, but through Historia’s kindness and love, and Levi’s guilt and understanding of what was sacrificed in the past, society will not repeat the same mistakes. The final panel could be Jean holding his child, perhaps with Mikasa, if she ever manages to get over losing Eren. That would be vague enough so that Isayama was able to show it to us already without spoiling much. Or maybe Jean’s dead and it’s not him at all. I don’t know. 😭

Right. Okay. So now you’re going, sweet story, but uh, there’s no way Levi could be the father. He’s so much older. Isayama wouldn't write a moment of romance like that. Not with him and Historia. YOU’RE JUST CRAZY.

Well this is where it get’s interesting. LET ME SHOW YOU. It’s foreshadowed literally everywhere. Right under our noses.

There is so much symbolism.

Dedicate your heart to what? has been Levi’s question recently. What are they all fighting for? What is he fighting for? How will he give meaning to his dead comrades sacrifices? Is killing Zeke really the extent of it? Is vengeance the true meaning of their sacrifices? Or is it something a lot more hopeful?

The answer is shown to us in the opening credits. And the ending credits. Several times.

Levi says so himself - he keeps messing fulfilling the vow up - why? Why is he so worried about killing Zeke?

Eren has the same questions to consider. Which PATH is the right one to take - revenge and violence with the rumbling, or love ... with Mikasa. We are literally shown what their choices will be in two virtually identically designed panels, which I’ll show you. Tragically, Eren’s choice is taken from him. He is a victim to the story - he must chose the path that saves humanity. Levi and Eren have been bound together through the theme of choices, and taking the ones which leave you with the least regrets, throughout this entire manga.

The upcoming anime episodes literally plot out the timeline of Levi and Historia’s changing attitude to one another, and then Historia’s pregnancy, it’s just so cleverly subtle. Isayama even tells us when/ during what event her child was probably conceived by just dropping dates in from other, seemingly unrelated plot lines.

Zeke gives pointed comments to Levi constantly - every other line of his is either a different jab at Levi about Historia’s pregnancy, a veiled question, or a reminder that he’s under the pressure of a 10 month time limit to do something about him, or Historia will have to eat him once she’s given birth. We start to see Levi unravel because of this, and make mistakes over and over.

It’s in official art. It’s in the soundtrack. Its in music videos. There’s interviews from Isayama that, when read in light of these ideas, suddenly take on a whole new meaning.

Isayama even trolls us. He’s laughing in our faces, the madman. Like, gotchu 🤣 suckers. While we’re all on Reddit and Twitter like, ‘Levi’s character has become so stagnated! He’s making such poor choices or not giving anything to the plot at all. All that’s left for him now is to give up and die! Be at peace, your story is over.’ OOF. Or, ‘Historia has just been forgotten! She’s become such a pointless character. Isayama just got bored with her and sidelined her.’

I’m going to try and write stuff up in the rough categories below, but these might change. I’ll link them when I’m done, and then pin this post. I’m a bit of a rambler so heads up - this may take a while 😅

There’s also a ton of people I have to mention who have contributed to this - I didn’t spot it by myself. I’ll tag them in the finished post too.

Historia and Levi’s Miscalculation: A manga tale featuring the Jaeger Bros., Pt. 1

Historia and Levi’s Miscalculation: A manga tale featuring the Jaeger Bros., Pt. 2

Historia and Levi’s Miscalculation: A manga tale featuring the Jaeger Bros., Pt. 3

Ackerman-Royal Bloodline and Levi’s Choice Pt. 1

Levi’s Choice Pt. 2

Suns, Moons and Songs

Akatsuki No Requiem - Right theory, Wrong guy

The Farmer and The Cattle Farming Goddess, or WHAT’S IN A NAME.

Mistakes of our parents and breaking the cycle

Memories from the future & Levi’s Guilt

Watch this space. And hold on to your pants. If I’m right, I’m getting very drunk.

#shingeki no kyojin spoilers #shingeki no kyojin manga theory #historia pregnancy #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #aot #levi ackerman #historia reiss #rivahisu

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novels-lover · 3 years ago

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Review of this son of York.

This is one of the most recent fictional novels about the life of Richard III from his childhood to his death, how is it different from other books? Well, it includes the scoliosis of Richard III as something crucial in his life that defines his character, despite the fact that the author seems to have a positive opinion of RIII in other books that she has written releated to him in this novel RIII is not innocent of all the crimes of those that history has accused him over the centuries, rather the book seeks to present us a balanced portrait of RIII, so he is not a misunderstood hero as in other recent books, the truth is that the book does not have success portraying his childhood that ended up being an illogical and simple portrait, his adolescence is affected by scoliosis and the problems of the country at this point the book does present an interesting, dark, insecure, ambitious character but not a bad person, here i would say that the book improves and becomes a quick read although it sacrifices the descriptive details in the process which does not allow you to get involved in the plot or in the scenarios, even so it becomes a good reading it develops the facts in an entertaining way, the ending is very well achieved with a dramatic and nostalgic touch, it is not a bad book but to be recent it leaves out many facts that are known from history of RIII, it is not the best book about RIII not the worst has good moments so I give it 3 stars no five because throughout the book many events become absurd.

SPOILERS

Anne Easter the author of this book has been writing novels about the family and even Richard's mistress who according to her book (A rose for the crown) gave him 3 children, and in this book she finally decided to take RIII as her character main bringing back to Kate the mistress presented in a rose for the crown, the books are not exactly a saga so it is not necessary to read the others to understand this one or any other.

Richard is a child who grows up in hard times, he faces the death of his father and political betrayals, which makes him a strong child who learns about justice and life (the lessons are credible but they are presented to him and absorbed in a rather ridiculous way), he is sent to the house of his cousin Richard Neville Kingmaker with whom he creates a bond, there he meets other childrens who will be his friends but unlike other books in this case Rob Percy is initially the closest to Richard not Francis Lovell, during these years of training Richard experiences a physical attraction a bit sexualized by Isabel Neville the eldest daughter of his mentor the kingmaker , Richard is almost a teenager like Isabel so this adoration is understandable but unfortunately she he ignores Richard because she likes Geroge of clarence Richard's hated brother with whom he can never get along because of the bulling and the incompatibility of personalities Geroge is an idiot ambitious and Richard is loyal and hardworking (the book does not do a great job showing these positive things in Richard at least not convincingly) Richard soon gets over his "adoration" for Isabel, oh by the way around fluttering like a butterfly is Anne Neville ,Isabel's younger sister who is almost obsessed with Richard whom she sees as a hero Why? No idea , he does nothing but treat her with contempt and manipulate her during those years but Anne seems to be determined to be a victim of life from the beginning. Richard soon begins to be independent and gets a mistress named Kate with whom he has a relationship of pure love and passion (quite romanticized and totally tragic: a royal duke and she a poor nobody) they have three children but Kate will hide the last one from him, Why? For Richard not to have this son on his conscience and go to his political marriage guilt-free (despite the fact that he was conceived before he got married which makes this part absurd and stupid, I mean two bastard children have to be accepeted by his future wife but THREE ?? (would be impossible according to kate's logic), the good thing is that we do not read so much of this cloying and silly romance, although it is clear to us that Kate is and will always be Richard's true love.

Richard suffers bitterly, the scoliosis feels that God punishes him and becomes pious (although he sleeps with Kate who is married and not to him obviosly ) the scoliosis bothers him a lot and is worse when he ends up in Exile in Burgundy for the second time in his life because his brother loses the throne, and more painful for Richard is knowing that his mentor Kingmaker is on the other side fighting for the Lancaster house and has also given his youngest daughter Anne Neville in marriage to Prince Edward of Lancaster that affects Richard and he is like: Nooo Anne! They say that Edward is a monster for sure it will be bad on her and now that I think about it, I would like her for a wife because of her pedigree (So Richard was an idiot with Anne but he is a Duke of York so it's okay, not that this Edward is a Lancaster so he does not have permission to be an idiot with Anne ok ....) Richard triumphs as a commander of his brothe York won and he becomes a hero, everything seems to be going well he has a good relationship with his brother the King and even with his sister-in-law queen Elizabeth, but the ugly part is that his duty is to assassinate the deposed King Henry VI whom he kills with his own hands (It sounds like something stolen from Shakespeare's play, it is also done in an absurd way, it is something like "take off clumsy mercenary I will do it ") from that moment Richard is convinced that God punishes him for this murder and the scoliosis worsens which leads him to develop mood swings and outbursts of anger, he goes to rule the north and decides to marry Anne Neville who lost her husband during the last battle of course that she is still stupidly in love with Richard, he leaves his mistress and promises to focus on his wife Anne who is a strong and sweet girl loving him nonetheless his bastards or his scolicis, she bears his mood swings, the love he always keeps in his heart for kate over the years, and waits in the sanctuary for months because Richard is a bit clumsy negotiating for their marriage with his brothers, thir life together is not so bad in general and he is faithful (in body because in mind he couldn't stop thinking about Kate even after Anne's death he falls into her arms again) he treats Anne with respect but he is not the husband of the year, for him Anne is a consolation but she will never be Kate who he sees through the years and he even uses his children as a remembrance of that love, all this while Anne goes around rubbing his sore back, being a good stepmother, a good wife, an excellent consort, and loving him madly, which I never understood, except to make love to her with charm, he does not do much to make her happy. (seriously Anne why did you love him all your life?).

Richard manages the north with efficiency and sees happy how is killed George Clarence his brother, not only he does not care about him but it seems good to him that they kill him as always they hated each other is understandable or should be but is not ( Richard felt gulty and sad for killing Henry VI, he became pious and God fearing but then he goes to support his own brother's murder for not reason apart from their childish fights every three or more years that they meet each other but it seems that was good for the plot so Richard kills someone else )

He becomes King at the death of his brother Edward with the typical version, Edward's non-legal marriage, Buckigham manipulates everything (Richard becomes alcoholic as events progress and does not use his logic much to unravel all the conspiracies), I was surprised that he will not kill the princes (Shakespeare must be disappointed), his niece elizabeth falls in love with him, Why? No idea at this point Richard is not only angry all the time but also a little out of control with the situation but she loves him, and gets angry when he rejects her "I hate you man I will marry Henry Tudor" (as if she had a vote in the bussines) The ending explains well the betrayal and the mental state of Richard I think that the most redeemable in general is this Richard that is dark quite complex but does not convince me especially considering that he was a man who even today generates hate or love, they had reasons to hate him but I saw few to love him, I think only Kate and Edward could consider him a good person in this book because he trated them well almost always, I recognize that the character is well done the author does a good job with him but I am not convinced nor do I like him I think he is terribly poorly balanced and the book for me is full of silly or a little absurd things that ruined the story, in general I am disappointed to know that now with so much information avaliable Anne easter still went for myths instead of go for facts or use her logic .

#anne neville #richard iii #george duke of clarence #anne Neville #isabel neville #anne easter

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writer-akihiko · 3 years ago

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After your hiatus, can you do a Yandere!Yamato (I don't know why, but I'm attracted to this guy from HEAVENS) x Reader in a Fairy Tale AU loosely based on Romeo and Juliet (but without the tragic ending). Set it in Victorianesque-era? The protagonists are from rival households (Raging and Shining if it'll make it easier) and as children, Yamato first encounters the reader from a distance (he sees her on the balcony of her bedroom and wandering through the mansion gardens) and becomes infatuated with her (leads into obsession). They finally meet at a party where the reader has her society debut (social gatherings are the only time the households have to be in each other's presence despite their rivalry) and his obsession with her intensifies, so much that he does crazy things just to be near her. I'll leave the rest of the story up to you!

Just Say Yes - Yandere!Yamato X Reader

Thank you for the request! This was also a birthday request, so I hope this was a good birthday present! Cut for Yandere content.

This is my personal characterisation of Yamato from Utapri as a Yandere. Actual Yamato would not do this; this is my take on how Yamato acts as a Yandere.

TWs: Light Yandere, Death, Manipulation

The day of the society debut.

The day where you'd finally be granted your social freedom, the day you were waiting to make friends, to enjoy the music, the dancing, the…

You'd wish the day would never come.

If you knew what he planned oh so long ago…

~○~

"Oh! Miss YN! You can't be dilly-dallying for so long! You must be prepared for tonight!" Your loyal maid, Tomochika cried out loud.

Once again, you had to leave your beloved balcony, your daydreaming haven for other business. You sighed, shifting your cardigan back on. You snapped out of your trance when your maid caught your attention.

"YN! What are you thinking about?!"

You huffed, confessing to your dear friend the person who haunted your daydreams. "A certain man…"

The gasp from Tomochika was expected. You knew how much of a sucker she was for a good romance. You let her have her giddy episode, as she hopped and skipped with joy.

"Who is he?!"

She repeated the question over and over again, shaking your shoulders. Before you could even reply, she listed off name after name of most likely handsome lords and barons.

"Is it Duke Ichinose?! Oh, but you've never seen him before…" She thought about it once again. "No, no, it should be the foreign Prince Camus! He's just come to the nation and all the ladies must be swooning~ Or is it the Kurusu twins?! One's a scholar and the other's a knight, certainly a great package-"

"It's… Lord Hyuga…"

CRASH!

The collision of the metal tray and the stone floor resonated throughout the room.

Tomochika grabbed onto your wrists, shaking you. "Y-You mean the older brother right?! The- The brother that leads the Neutral Faction, and not-"

"Lord Yamato Hyuga…"

"Y-YN… I feel faint…"

Tomochika dramatically fell over onto your bed, wanting to scream. "YN, I really care for you, but…"

You hesitated. "I know what you might say…"

"How?!" She asked, on her knees, tugging the end of your dress. "You know it's a hopeless love, please YN, I want you to be happy!"

You shrugged her off, stooping to her level. "I know… I know it's impossible…"

You comforted her, hugging her. Your tears also soaked her uniform, as you couldn't stop the way you felt. It felt useless to have such feelings.

The world wouldn't change itself for your sake after all.

~○~

"…And that is what I overheard from the LN estate, Yamato." Shion reported. Undergoing such an operation would be called mad, but there was no guarantee that Yamato would be safe, especially when it came to things regarding YN.

"Van also reported that the Head of the LN Family plans to undergo a political marriage," Yamato added, staring at the map of the division of land. As a local of the Otori Faction, it was damn near impossible to get close to her, but with all of his plans finally falling in place, he might just achieve his one goal.

"I'll visit Eichii tonight," He announced to Shion. "He can have the LN's land for all I care. I just want YN…"

"Understood, Lord Yamato."

~○~

The cheerful joys of the townspeople would soon be ruined, Yamato thought to himself, as he rode the same carriage as the Kurusu twins and Count Shinomiya.

"Hoi, Yamato," Syo called out. "I know you're mostly doing this on your own, so I wanna apologise for not contributing sooner."

He shook his head. "The one you should be apologising to is Eichii. After all, I just want to get my darling and get out," He admitted. He got a tiny kick out of the Kurusu scholar, Kaoru looking so shocked at his intentions. "If Kira hadn't found out about the utter corruption going on in the Shining Faction, I might've just lived on with a broken heart."

Count Natsuki grinned, patting his shoulder. "What a lovestruck lad, don't you agree Syo-chan? But it isn't as cute as you two~"

The usual teasing between the three went on, as Yamato prepared his disguise. Everything had to go picture perfect, otherwise he'd die trying.

~○~

"Your attendant, Count Shinomiya?" The servant asked.

Count Shinomiya was excellent at hiding a true façade, as he was well-known for being a happy-go-lucky man. "Why yes. Thank you for inquiring so."

Once Yamato entered the debut ball, he bolted to the balcony, beyond the gardens and there he found you…

He climbed over the walls, hopping over to you. He couldn't stop himself from twirling you around, kissing your cheek and peppering kisses over your face.

"My YN… I've missed you…"

Your reddened face and your dress just made Yamato want to whisk you away… "YN, you should be prepared. Don't be afraid when people start bursting in. Stick close to the stairs or the walls. I'll find you."

You could only nod, hesitant about what Yamato could mean.

~○~

Your heart thumped, simply waiting for the disaster to begin. Your usual self wouldn't want such harm, but this was a chance. A chance to escape the constricted life that you lead on…

The scream of a woman alerted you that the assailants were breaking through the glass of the room. Tomochika immediately rushed to your side, holding onto your arm as you both sunk to the ground.

The men in dark clothes knocked out a number of guests, leaving the higher nobles alive and standing. You could only assume that Yamato also had the men corner the other guards and knights.

A man approached you, hugging you by the waist and revealing himself as Yamato Hyuga. A few gasps rung through the room, and your cousin flew into a fury.

"What is the meaning of this?! We had a truce! You dare defile the contrac-"

Before your cousin could utter another word, Yamato silenced him with his sword.

He looked over your family in utter disgust, wasting no time to order his men to execute them.

"Ya-Yamato?" You were in tears, seeing your family killed and other nobles killed. You could only assume that the nobles left alive were working with Yamato as well.

He got on one knee, kissing your hand. "What is it YN? With this rebellion, we can be free to marry. You can be my wife, forever…"

You shivered, instinctively pulling away from his hand. You immediately regretted it, as your lover had a look of utter disappointment on his face.

"What is it YN? Don't you love me?"

"Y-Yes I do but-"

"Then is it so hard?...

Just say yes."

#yandere yamato #uta no prince sama #utapri #yamato hyuga #utapri yamato #yamato x reader #utapri yamato x reader #yandere yamato hyuga #yandere utapri

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whitters23 · 4 years ago

Note

Logan is a cheater though, even if you were to say that he didn't cheat on Rory with those girls, he's a cheater in the revival because he's cheating on his fiancee with Rory. No amount of bias or love for the character can deny that fact, and yeah, Rory cheats in that too, but so does Logan. He has every capability in his hands to break up with his fiancee and stop treating Rory as a mistress but he doesn't. So at the end of the day, he's still a cheater when he shouldn't be.

You’re right. In the revival he is a cheater. I don’t love that, but like you said Rory is a cheater too. She cheated on Dean with Jess, cheated WITH Dean, and cheated on Logan with Jess to get back at him when she believed he had cheated on her. I’ve never hated her for it then and I don’t hate her for it now. I never liked the cheating, but it didn’t spoil her character for me, nor does it spoil Logan for me now.

In real life I do not condone cheating, would never cheat, and would be devastated if I was cheated on, but in television there are times when I can forgive it. I think it’s because we, as viewers, have the advantage of seeing the story from all sides and witness what each character is feeling. When it comes to matters of the heart, things are not always black and white. Love can be messy and there are a lot of grey areas.

When I first watched the revival I was upset with the Logan and Rory story line. I remember being so disappointed that they did that to their characters. However, 4 years later, after having some time to mull it over and properly digest it, I have softened towards the situation. I am still not happy that they were cheating but I have come to a better understanding of what their motivations might have been and accept that even though they were doing something hurtful to their partners, that does not mean they are bad people, nor were their characters completely ruined.

First of all the reason that he was engaged to someone in the revival was because ASP needed a reasonable excuse for them not to end up together so that she could end with Rory pregnant and potentially having to raise the child on her own, like Lorelai. If he was not already in a serious relationship there would be nothing holding him back from being with Rory and raising the baby with her and ASP’s cyclical journey would be ruined.

Now, as for the issue of him having the power to break it off with his fiancé and stop treating Rory like a mistress... I think it is more complicated and nuanced than that. Let’s remember that the last time they saw each other she had turned down his proposal. The consequences of that actually help dictate their behaviour in the revival. Logan wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, Rory was his great love and still is after all these years… but she turned him down. I think now that they have reconnected Logan is afraid that Rory’s heart is not as invested as his is. I have a feeling that Rory was the one that came up with the Vegas agreement after the implied first time in Hamburg (she is the one that keeps bringing it up and reminding him of their original terms), and because Logan believed his was the only heart he was risking, he went along with it. He was happy to have Rory back in his life in any way she would allow and he didn’t want to lose her again, even if it killed him inside. (That’s also one of the motivating factors of why he took her for one last night out with the boys and why he gave her that key. Even if the affair was over, he was desperate to retain some connection to her, no matter how tenuous. Check out the way he reacts when she tries to give the key back. It physically pains him.) So even though he loves her and is desperate to keep her in his life, it is because he is unsure of what Rory wants that he doesn’t break it off with Odette. It was obvious to me when I first watched it, and then later I saw an interview with Matt Czuchry that confirmed it, that Logan was waiting for Rory to ask him to leave Odette in that scene at the tango club. The way he looked at her when she asked if he was really going to marry Odette seemed to say “You’re the one I want. Tell me not to go through with it.” If Rory had made her feelings clear to Logan, if he knew he had a chance at a future with her, I believe he would have left Odette in a heartbeat. As for Rory, she is kind of in the same boat. When she turned him down it wasn’t because she didn’t love him. It was because the timing was not right. When we see her in the revival it seems like she hasn’t really had any other major romances since we last saw her, her relationship with Paul is literally a joke, so I am inclined to believe that her love for Logan never really died either. He is the one she let get away. So when he’s suddenly back in her life, she’s so desperate to keep spending time with him that she is willing to lie to herself again and insist that they can just have a casual relationship, no strings attached. And in convincing herself that it’s completely casual she also convinces herself that he is not interested in anything more than “Vegas”, so she is hesitant to push for more. Also, maybe she feels like she doesn’t have a right to ask him to leave his fiancé for her. She loves him and she wants him but she broke his heart before. How can she ask him to drop everything for her when she said no almost 10 years prior? To us, as viewers it’s all so clear. I mean come on! It was never just a “what happens in Vegas” thing for either of them. They were breaking the rules from the get go. That’s why she had boxes of her personal belongings sent to his house, and let him check her phone, and used his personal computer for work. It’s why she sought out his opinions and advice about work and why he was always there to encourage her. It’s why she called him any time, day or night, and without fail he answered. It’s why when she is upset her first instinct is to call him and why he wants her to always feel like she can call him if she needs to talk. And that’s what’s so tragic about this story line. They both want the same thing but are afraid to speak up. So, while it is true that they both had the capability of putting an end to their nonsense and just be together officially, I can understand the mental roadblocks that were interfering with their ability to actually do so.

#my messages #Gilmore Girls #logan x rory #Logan Huntzberger #gg discussion #AYITL

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akatsuki-shin · 4 years ago

Text

Review: 天官赐福 Tiān Guān Cì Fú (Heaven Official's Blessing)

Notes:

(Very) long post ahead

Contains spoiler

This is my personal review and does not represent the entire audience, you are free to agree or not agree with what I’ve written here

Feel free to reply/send me a message if there are things you want to discuss

Summary:

The most beloved Crown Prince, pride of the Kingdom of Xianle with abundance of talents and achievements, Xie Lian, ascended to Heaven and became a martial god at the young age of 17 on the path to fulfill his dream "to save the common people".

Three years after his ascension, he saw his kingdom beginning to decline and in order to save his beloved country, Xie Lian defied the rules of Heaven and descended back to the mortal realm. Nevertheless, instead of saving them, his interference ended up accelerating the fall of Xianle, annihilating the once prosperous nation under the war of rebellion and a mysterious, horrifying plague.

The people who once praised and worshipped him day and night now condemned him, his devotees left him, they burnt his temples and divine statues, and Xie Lian himself was ultimately banished from the Heaven.

He ascended for the second time a short while later, but was banished once more very soon after. Since then, he lived among the mortals - surviving by collecting junks as he was now branded as the "God of Misfortune", the "Scrap Collecting Immortal".

800 years later, Xie Lian ascended again for the third time. Though having neither temples nor devotees, he accepted his responsibility as a martial god and carried on with his duties until one day, there came a certain, incidental encounter with a mysterious youth clad in red.

STORY: 7/10

TGCF overall is an (almost) complete, satisfying read with well-written twists and development.

Unlike the two previous MXTX's novels, the main pairing here (HuaLian) did not have to go through complicated misunderstandings and is a beautiful representation of love and devotion. Of course, this means there is a lack of conflict between them, but considering all the trials and tribulations the characters have gone through, this lack of conflict feels like a relieving fresh spring amidst the painful and exhausting journey throughout the entire five books.

The best and my most favorite plot twist is the Earth Master Ming Yi having been dead for a while, and the "Ming Yi" we know turns out to be the Black Water Submerging Boats, He Xuan. I'm the kind of person who always suspects characters, but even my furthest suspicion was "only" him being the Reverend of Empty Words, not He Xuan.

Truthfully, prior to reading this novel, I've seen Shi Qingxuan's "MING-XIONG, I'M SORRY x9999" post before without context, and I thought Ming Yi was going to die a tragic death because of Shi Qingxuan. Turns out it's kind of the opposite, huh? Nice one, really.

I also like how each character's "end" feels satisfying. Especially for the villains, they didn't necessarily have to die some tragic, vengeful death, but was provided with an ending that perfectly fits their background story and deeds. For example, in most stories, a character like Xuan Ji would be most likely be given some well-deserved punishment as her death, given everything she's done. But no, in the end she was given a reality check and was finally able to let go of her hundreds of years grudge. And then Qi Rong - I will talk more about him later on in the "Character" section.

One part I really love is the Extra Chapter about the Cave of Ten Thousand Gods. The chapter itself overall is mostly nonsensical and chaotic, but it was just so touching when HuaLian created a "Little Hua Cheng" statue to accompany Xie Lian's "Crown Prince who Pleased the Gods" statue, especially when this Little Hua Cheng statue gave Crown Prince Xie Lian statue a flower, and then Crown Prince Xie Lian received it, lifted him up and carried him in his arms. This one was maybe a bit biased because as much as I love the current HuaLian, I have a special soft spot for the young Xie Lian carrying, cradling the little Hua Cheng back then in the past. ;v;

Though, with all due respect, I must say that TGCF is actually below my expectation.

The biggest issue I have with TGCF is... What is Xie Lian's motivation? What drives him to move forward in the story? What is even the whole story's purpose?

I'm not quite sure how to word this properly, but let me give some examples.

When you read Harry Potter, you know immediately that Voldemort is the bad guy and he must be defeated.

When you read the Lord of the Rings, you know immediately that the One Ring must be destroyed to prevent Sauron from regaining his power.

Or, in MXTX previous works...

In SVSSS, it was clear since the beginning that Shen Yuan's mission is to fix the "Proud Immortal Demon Way" if he wants to survive.

In MDZS, it was clear that Wei Wuxian, together with Lan Wangji's, needs to unravel the mystery behind that fierce left arm. All of their past stories and WangXian getting together in the end are just something they discovered along the way, not the initial "motivation" that drives the character to move forward.

What about TGCF? The Xie Lian who ascended for the third time actually looks like he just wants to go along with the flow, carrying out his duties day by day with responsibility. When Bai Wuxiang later, later, later on appeared to haunt him again, it didn't seem like Xie Lian has any ambition to hunt him down or exact a revenge, just that he wanted to forget about Bai Wuxiang and never recall anything about him ever again. The main character looks like he's not being driven by anything, just...carrying on where the plot takes him? It's just missions after missions and whatever huge things happening in between is just something they accidentally passed by along the way.

At this point, the only purpose of the story I can think of is bringing Hua Cheng and Xie Lian together. The romance is great, I have no complain. But if it's just that, no need to jammed-pack 250+ chapters just to make two people getting together?

Speaking of which, I also think that the way new characters keep being introduced all the way to almost the final showdown of the story feels info dump-ish, because the background story needs to be dropped there along with the characters, but then most of these characters fade away immediately after.

For example, the previous Civil God before Ling Wen, who looks like he’s going to pose some real trouble, but then was easily defeated and was never mentioned again afterwards. And this is especially true for He Xuan; after such a huge arc where he committed such extreme things, after that he was barely mentioned again, even having his “strong impression” leveled down by the joke about him being the poorest Calamity and owing lots of debts to Hua Cheng.

Basically what makes TGCF a long story is because there are too many stories about the side characters in addition to the main characters that are dumped out of the blue instead of slowly being revealed along the way.

Though, I love how the story gradually unravels the "Four Famous Tales" because initially, I thought it wasn't something crucial, and I wished they could've done this for other characters, too.

There is a little bit of plot holes here and there, as in who actually cut open Jian Lan/Lan Chang's baby and made it a ghost, and for what? Even if it turned out that she just met a bad guy or nobody important, at least provide an explanation in one paragraph? Especially because important side characters like Feng Xin and Mu Qing are involved here, so I'm pretty sure us readers need some explanation.

And more importantly, how can Jun Wu become the Emperor martial god? There's no mention about him ascending, only that he annihilated a dynasty of gods before sitting on the throne of the Great Martial Hall. But how can he, like, emitted god-like aura and not some evil aura? Is it because he used to be a god? But he's a ghost? Explanation where???

The gags and comedies are pretty fun, but honestly, the more I read, the more they ruin the atmosphere and suspense, added with the uncalled PDA between Hua Cheng and Xie Lian even during the most important moments. Honestly, I was bored the fuck out of my life from the moment they start fighting Jun Wu with those divine gundams, and only start gaining interest again much later on when Hua Cheng dissipated into butterflies.

Not saying the story's bad. Just... It's not up to my expectation... Characters being inserted here and there with a bunch of background story, gags and a show of PDA being flaunted during crucial moments. And when Mei Nianqing started telling the truth about the Kingdom of Wuyong, that's just plain info dump right there, seriously...

CHARACTERS: 7/10

Interesting characters, but only a few bore a lasting impression on me. Other than the main characters, which are Xie Lian and Hua Cheng, the only side characters (minus Bai Wuxiang as the main villain) who left quite some impression on me were probably just Feng Xin and Mu Qing.

Pei Ming is okay, at least he is still memorable until the end, and his character improved, too.

He Xuan, after having been introduced with such extreme, after his arc is over, was easily forgotten just like that.

Mei Nianqing, is borderline Deus Ex-Machina with a huge chunk of info dump that could solve everything, then he stopped being useful for the rest of the story.

Shi Qingxuan... Honestly, he's almost annoying, too noisy. I don’t hate him (and I kind of like him initially), but the way his character was being handled and presented post-Black Water arc feels disappointingly lazy and he was just there to make the party more merry.

Xie Lian himself, as the protagonist, how do I say this... This is maybe due to the translator's writing style (not MXTX’s fault), but whenever he screams in all capslock, it feels too extreme and borderline OOC? Of course, the original novel written in hanzi couldn't have included capslock.

What's great about him, though, is that despite all he'd gone through, he can still retain a pure heart and could not be swayed to be evil, just as he himself said "Body in the abyss, heart in paradise".

Now Hua Cheng, he is overall a super interesting character and I personally love this type of male characters. But he seriously is way too OP, almost like the original Luo Binghe (Bing-ge) a.k.a. too ideal, too perfect, no flaws, always capable of easily finding a way out in every single peril. I only forgive him for being like this because he dissipated into butterflies at the end of the battle with Jun Wu, making me think "oh, finally he's actually not invincible".

Still, his devotion to Xie Lian is very well written, very well presented, and his "I am forever your most devoted believer" is just downright the most powerful line in the whole story.

Now I promised to talk about Qi Rong, yeah? I haven't the slightest idea why it is even necessary to have Qi Rong as the Night-touring Green Lantern. I mean, yes he is there to make up the number of the Four Great Calamities, but that was for the characters who live in that world. As the novel's reader, I don't see any particularly important roles there for Qi Rong other than being an annoying meme fodder despite his actually pretty-cool first foreshadowing and appearance? Even his issue with Lang Qianqiu does not seem to give that much impact on the overall story, it could've just passed simply being explained in several pages.

Though I'd say he's got the best character development compared to others. Instead of dying as some hateful villain, the way he ended up deciding to protect Guzi at the cost of his own life can already be expected from miles away, but still bittersweet and touching nonetheless - how this crazed, mental person could still love when being presented with such pure, innocent feelings to the point that he acknowledged Guzi as a his own son.

By the way, E Ming and Ruoye are cute, I take no criticism.

TECHNICAL ASPECTS: 8/10

I can't really describe this with words, but MXTX's overall writing technique has greatly improved since MDZS.

It feels more "solid" to read instead of scattered here and there.

The info distribution has improved (fewer info dump compared to before), the story's no longer switching between past and present all of a sudden.

Description of characters and environment are sufficient, the plot is progressing steadily.

Several issues I have with this aspect though, the Prologue being ten pages is just way too long, I don't think I need that much information being stuffed right to my face right from the beginning.

There are excessive use of "Turns out..." every single time an explanation is going to come.

"Xie Lian didn't know whether he should cry or laugh" is honestly has been used probably more than 50 times just in the last two books. Although I'm reading a translation, I'm pretty sure the original Chinese version is being repetitive with this phrase, as well, because the translators couldn't just whip up any other phrase from thin air and put it in someone else's novel.

Almost half of scene transition is always caused by some sudden, external disturbance like "All of a sudden they heard someone's coming", "All of a sudden X visits their room", etc.

OVERALL SCORE: 7.3/10

Worth to read, satisfying overall. The main pairing's love story is just so well written and sweet. As long as you can withstand the violence and gore, though. 😂

TGCF highlights perhaps one of the ugliest natures of mankind: Being nice to someone as long as they're beneficial, and immediately throwing them away once the benefit was no more.

Once that person does not seem to be beneficial anymore, everyone would leave them instantly, even turning on them and start spitting on them without even trying to understand the reason why said person "stopped being beneficial".

Both as a Crown Prince and a martial god, Xie Lian and the Crown Prince of Wuyong were praised, revered, worshipped by the citizens of Xianle and Wuyong respectively. Because they were always helping, always fulfilling the people's wishes. But how easily it was for those very same people to turn on Xie Lian and the Crown Prince of Wuyong when they encountered misfortunes, completely turning a blind eye to the laborious effort both characters have been putting to save them from annihilation, even if it was visible in broad daylight.

It is also worth to note another trait of mankind that this story underlines: To always find a scapegoat or blame others for one's own misfortune and failure - be it another human being, another group of people, the government, even the gods - after having taking their generosity for granted.

Which is why I think the true villain of the story is not Bai Wuxiang, but those citizens of the ancient Wuyong who were now nothing more than resentful spirits eternally burning within the lava of Tonglu Mountain - a well deserved punishment after what they did to their Crown Prince.

#Tian Guan Ci Fu #TGCF #Heaven Officials Blessing #HuaLian #Xie Lian #Hua Cheng #Review #Danmei #MXTX #Mo Xiang Tong Xiu

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sillyrabbit81 · 4 years ago

Text

Her Heavy Cross

Summary: Three years after tragedy hits, Lana she decides to start dating again. She meets Will through a dating app and they begin an online romance. After months of constant requests, Lana relents and agrees to meet and go on an irl date with Will. But is Will who he says he is? Lana is quickly pulled into an intense relationship forcing her to confront her tragic past. Will Lana face it or will she close her heart forever?

Pairing: OMC x OFC

Word Count: approx 4k

Warnings: mention of sexual assault, swearing, smoking, implied smut

Authors Note: The story started as a Henry Cavill fanfiction but I changed it to be an original character, but shades of Henry are still there. Hope you enjoy the story and thanks for reading.

Part 18 Part 20

Part 19

It took over two hours to get ready. I don't know how celebrities did this all the time. I enjoy dressing up, but not when I know the pictures will be circulated widely, and every time someone types into google "Liam Cross's girlfriend", images of tonight will come up. It freaked me out.

I trusted Liam when he said the dress was right, and I trusted Jen. She had only just started dating Riza when Andy and I got married, so although she hadn't done my hair and makeup, I had seen her work and the brides always looked good. So when I asked her to do my makeup for the premiere, I didn't think twice. I regretted that when Jen took the pins out of my hair.

"Jen, I look like Orphan Annie," I complained.

She just laughed and said, "trust me." She started to work a brush through my hair while humming Tomorrow. I groaned.

But as she worked the brush, the curls started to join together, and beautiful waves appeared in my hair.

"You're a genius," I said to Jen when I finally worked out what she was doing.

Jen blushed and just kept brushing. "I have always wanted to do this to your hair. You have such a timeless facial structure. I knew it would be perfect for you and for tonight."

She did my makeup in a beautiful smokey eye and deep red lipstick. It was not too dissimilar to what I would do for myself, but she added fake lashes, brushed and plucked my eye-brows and did some light contouring. She even checked my legs and arms for marks and bruises, covering any she could find.

Jen helped me dress and double-checked everything, including any visible panty line. I couldn't see how it would be possible to have a panty line since I had gotten the smallest underwear I could find, which was a string attached to a triangle of lace.

When I was ready, I looked in the dressing room's full-length mirror. I almost cried in relief. I felt like I would fit in and not look like I had a face like a dropped pie. Jen had done a fantastic job with my hair, and I looked like a cross between Rita Hayworth and Jessica Rabbit. I adored the old Hollywood style. I thanked her a million times, and she went downstairs to get Liam and Riza.

I paced the bedroom waiting for them to come back. Being alone in the room had allowed my anxieties to creep back in. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, in through my nose and out through my mouth. The dress was tight, and I couldn't quite breathe deeply enough. But I was not going to ruin this night with my anxiety. I was not. My guts didn't care what my brain was telling itself. They churned and flipped in my belly until I thought I was going to be sick.

"Lana," Liam said from the doorway. He was alone. Riza and Jen must have waited downstairs. I gasped as I took him in. The was wearing a black woollen three-piece suit with a black tie and crisp white cotton shirt with onyx cuff links. He had was clean-shaven and had his hair combed down in little waves. He looked like he had stepped off the movie screen. He looked so perfect.

"You look incredible," I tell him.

He laughed, "No, Sweetheart. Not next to you, I don't." He crossed the space between us and took my hands, spreading them wide to get a good look. "You are a vision."

I blushed and said, "I feel sick."

Liam shook his head, "you're going to do great." Liam lead me to the dressing room and stood behind me in front of the mirror. "Sweetheart, look at yourself. Look at your hair," he touched it cautiously, just above my ear, as if scared his feather-light touch would ruin it.

"Do you know how much money some women would pay to have hair as spectacular as yours? And your body, the way it curves and moves with such grace. Your skin is so delicate and as smooth as silk." Liam ran his finger down my neck until I shivered and smiled. "And that smile, my Sweetheart, You don't know what lengths I will go to for that smile. It would make Helen of Troy hang her head in despair."

"Thank you," I said. "I needed that."

"It's true." Liam kissed my forehead tenderly, his lips just barely brushing my skin. "I want to kiss you. But I'm under very strict instructions from Jen not to. But be prepared for an attack after the red carpet." He kissed my neck with as much care as before and sighed. Then he seemed to shake himself off and asked, "are you ready to go?"

I nodded. "As ready as I'll ever be."

"Ok, let's go downstairs. Apparently, we have some pictures to take."

The drive to the cinema was short, but the limousines' line was long. I barely remember anything until our car was the next in line. Liam had been going through a last-minute rundown of what should happen.

"Remember, I will get out first and wave a bit. Just wait until I turn around, and I will help you out of the car." I nod, and he continues. "Then we will both stand in front of the car. I might wave again, but you don't have to. Just smile. Once we get past the initial photographers, there will be fans, and then there may be some interviews. Do you remember what will happen there?"

"You will sign some autographs and take some pictures. I'm to follow you. You're going to hold my hand the whole time through that part, right?" I asked.

Liam took my hand and lifted it to his lips, pressing a kiss into my palm. "Nothing could make me let it go." He said sincerely. "If there are interviews, they are usually very short, only a few questions. They may ask you who you are, and I'll introduce you, and you smile and say hi. I doubt they will ask you anything other than how you're enjoying the night, but if they do, I'll handle it."

"Ok," I murmured. "I wish I had a ciggie."

Liam smiled, "If you still want one when we're done, I'll find you one. The last part is where the main paparazzi photos will be taken. They will want photos of both of us, but they will also want ones of just me. Usually, they will call out something like "fashion", and that means you can walk to the cinema and some publicists or assistants will take you into the foyer, and you can wait for me there. Ok?"

I nodded and felt bile rise in my throat. I swallowed hard, but it wouldn't go away. My mouth filled with saliva, and I kept trying to swallow it.

"Lana?"

"Air." I gasped. "I need air,"

I put down my window just as Liam shouted, "no, Lana! Don't!"

The roar I heard was like being at a footie Grand Final. I was confronted with hundreds of screaming faces lining the road opposite the cinema. Their eyes were wild. Their bodies bounced and writhed in joy and excitement. They lifted posters and toys, screaming for Liam Cross.

Liam leaned over me and, waving at the crowd, quickly pressed the button to put the window up.

"What the fuck was that?" I yelled.

"Fans."

"You didn't tell me they would be on both sides!"

"I didn't think you would put your window down."

"Your life..." I started.

"Isn't normal." We both finished.

Liam laughed, "on the plus side Lana, you have your colour back. Do you still feel sick?"

I shook my head. "No. Now I'm just terrified." The limo started moving.

I gripped Liam's hand as if we were nearing the top of a roller coaster. He ran his thumb over my knuckles and said, "We can still go home if you want." He cupped my cheek and looked at me. The car stopped.

I shook my head. "Just don't leave me."

He smiled and kissed my neck. His skin felt different, having shaved, but his kiss was still the same. "Never." He whispered.

The door was opened, and Liam got out.

I breathed deeply, trying to calm. The dress was bloody tight. Then Liam's hand was there, and I took it.

His eyes found mine, and I fell into them. He smiled his most beautiful smile, the one where his cheeks and eyes crinkled and his teeth flashed. I found myself unable to stop my smile. How could I not smile when he looked so happy.

As I stood up, his hand came around my waist, and he pulled me tight. He leaned into my ear and said loud enough to be heard over the roar of the crowd and the shouts from the photographers, "Thank-you for doing this, Lana." He kissed my ear so swiftly I thought I had imagined it.

The procession down the red carpet went as he said it would. The fans were electric and not as frightening as I thought they would be. Some even tried to talk to me, which was awkward because I had no idea what to say. I just tried to be polite and smiled.

Liam was amazing. He never let go of my hand. One-handed, he signed autographs, shook hands, gave hugs and took selfies. He was so charming, looked the fans in the eye, seemed genuinely happy and interested to hear what they had to say. He even blushed when some of the fans oohed after he had run his fingers through his hair. Just watching how much he seemed to love this part of his job made me forget a lot of my own anxieties.

Liam was a bit different with the interviewers, more alert and guarded. But his charm and wit were still there. A few interviewers, mostly the more gossipy outlets, asked about me. The film focussed ones largely ignored me. I hoped I gave coherent responses, and Liam was as good as his word and stepped in when he needed to and took control of the interviews. I couldn't believe how many times he had to answer the same questions, and he answered each with as much enthusiasm as he had the first time he was asked.

Quicker than I thought, we stopped for the last row of photographers. They shouted for Liam's attention and were almost as loud as the fans. When the time came for Liam to do photos on his own, he brushed his lips against my neck and said in my ear, "Lana, you were perfect. Go on. I'll be with you in a minute."

I went to the end and was greeted by the publicists who ushered me into the crowded cinema foyer. I found a quiet corner and waited for about five minutes before I saw Liam practically barge his way through the crowd, his eyes searching until he saw me.

He grabbed my hips and kissed my mouth so hard I thought they would bruise.

"Lana, that was perfect. Thank you for doing that with me."

I smiled a genuine, relaxed smile for the first time in hours and asked, "so it's over?"

"It's over," Liam confirmed.

I exhaled with relief and said, "you'd have to be the only person in the world I would ever go through that for."

Liam kissed me again, softer this time, lips playing against mine, "you don't know how much that means to me." He hugged me tightly before staring at me and smiling at his goofy grin. Then he said, "come on, Sweetheart. I have a few people I'd like to introduce you to. If you are up for it, that is. Do you need more time?" I shook my head, and he led me into the crowd.

Liam grabbed my hand and moved fast through the crowd, briefly saying hi to some people on the way.

I saw Myra come in from the red carpet, and I pointed her out to Liam. Liam waved her over, and she waved back then held her hand up in a 'give me a second' gesture. She went to the corner I had been hiding in and kissed a man I assumed was her boyfriend and brought him over.

I liked her instantly. She was bubbly and happy. It was like she was famous enough to be bored by the goings-on around her, but still new enough that she hadn't developed the jaded 'here we go again' attitude that you would expect.

"Phew! That was crazy tonight. I'd say that's your fault, Liam. No one else here is big enough to pull a crowd that big." She leaned over and kissed his cheeks in the European style. "Thanks for doing it, mate. I mean, it'll be good for Stones but still, it'll help with this movie too."

Liam smiled, "Don't mention it." Liam pulled me closer and introduced me.

Myra smiled widely and pulled me into a hug. She was a few years younger than me, and she was beautiful. She had gorgeous thick dark hair, cheekbones to die for under radiant umber skin, which appeared to be without a blemish and striking sea-green eyes. She was very tall, almost as tall as Liam, but very thin. She felt so delicate when I hugged her back, but it was evident from her speech and body language; she wasn't a shrinking violet.

"Hey babes, so good to meet you. I've heard so much. You look so good. That's from Maticevski, right? Great choice. I love him." I usually cringe when I hear the word 'babes'. I think of Married at First Sight for some reason. However, coming from Myra, it just sounded sweet.

"Thanks. Liam has spoken about you too."

"Yeah, Pop has been good to me," Myra said, throwing a look at Liam that made his eyes roll.

"It's twelve years, Myra, hardly Grandfather territory."

"It's not your age. It's your attitude." She said in a snarky but playful way. "Anyway, this is my Damo. Well, Damien, but nobody calls him that." Damo smiled awkwardly and shook our hands.

Myra wrapped her arms around his waist and said teasingly, "Aww, he's shy." From the look Damo gave Myra, I'd say smitten was a better way to describe him. He's tall like Liam, and though muscular, you could tell it came from physical labour, not a gym. He had a surfie look about him with his sun-bleached shoulder long hair and tanned skin.

"I'm going for a smoke before the movie starts," Damo said to Myra.

"Can Lana have one?" Liam asks. "She has quit, but she said she would like one." I looked at Liam with gratitude, and Damo and I went behind the theatre where a smoking area was set up.

We could still hear a lot of activity going on out the front, but it appeared most of the excitement was over. Damo lit our cigarettes, and I leaned against the wall, relishing the nicotine flowing through me.

Damo laughed, "you look how I feel. Over it."

"Yeah, it's full-on, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it's bullshit crazy."

"So, where do you live? How did you meet Myra and get wrapped up in this bullshit?" I asked with genuine interest. He seemed even more out of place here than I did.

Damo told me he was from the Northern Beaches and was in the year above Myra at school. He had asked her to his Year 12 formal, and she accepted, but she had cancelled to go to Melbourne for her first major acting role. "So, I don't hear from her for years, but she finds me on Instagram through old mates from school, and she tells me that I owe her a date."

"That's kinda cute."

"Yeah, surprised the fuck out of me, though. Like, why'd ya wanna go out with a sparky from the Northern Beaches."

I smiled at him, knowing the feeling. "Maybe all this bullshit gets to them, and they want someone real? Someone who doesn't want anything from them except their time and affection."

Damo smiles and nods his head. "I reckon you're onto something. So what's your story?"

I don't tell him all the details but that we met online and I didn't know who he was until I met him. "It was a complete shock when I found out who I'd been talking to."

"Fair dinkum? You met him three weeks ago?" I nodded, "It took Myra five months to convince me to go to one of these things."

I laughed, "Yeah, well, I just thought better get it over with. The sooner people can get over that Liam has a new girlfriend, the quicker I can get back to normal and not worry about it."

Damo nodded and said, "yeah, I hope so too. Myra's life can get pretty crazy."

We finished our cigarettes and went back inside. We had hardly gotten through the door when we were whisked away by our partners because the movie was about to start.

After the movie, there was a small after-party for industry people only. The people who had won tickets or were friends of friends weren't invited. Liam, of course, was invited and had planned not to go. Myra pleaded with him to stay, so when he looked at me asking the silent question, I nodded, already getting the feeling not many people could say no to Myra. Myra bounced around and hugged us both.

Liam introduced me to a few other people, including Boyd, who turned out to be an outrageous flirt and a shit-stirrer. He seemed harmless and just enjoyed taking the piss out of people. He also told me something interesting about Liam that I planned to bring up with him later.

Liam also introduced me to the showrunner Arianna, who was essentially his boss. Finally, I was introduced to Naomi, who was to play Boyd's love interest, and she was also in the movie we had just watched. The Australian film industry is pretty small.

Naomi was the opposite of Myra, friendly on the outside but was one of those people who always seemed to be looking around when you talked to them to see if there was someone more interesting or more advantageous she should be speaking to. She had icy blue eyes, bombshell blonde hair, amazing breasts and a nose that was so perfect it had to have been a nose job.

She flirted hard with Liam, touching his arm, letting it linger that little bit too long. She ignored me mostly, except when she threw me some side-eye. Liam seemed to take it in his stride, polite but not friendly, until she 'accidentally' brushed her breasts against his arm.

Liam seemed to have enough, and his eyes went dark. He put his hand to my back and practically pushed me out, saying we were leaving. His tone didn't leave much room for argument, but I wanted to know why he left so suddenly when things had been going well, and I actually enjoyed the party. I was also feeling bad that I didn't say goodbye to Myra and the others.

Liam's limo was waiting outside, and he ushered me in quickly. Liam texted Myra to say goodbye and to let the others we left. "Myra won't mind. She knows how I feel about Naomi."

I said hi to our driver before turning to Liam. "Is there a history there?" I ask. My voice was small.

Liam scoffed, "she wishes." He sighed and stretched his neck. He took his jacket off, opened his vest and loosed his tie. I looked at him expectantly. He taps the driver on the shoulder and apologises, but he's going to put the screen up.

When the screen was in place, Liam started to roll his sleeves up. It seemed like he was stalling. Eventually, he said, "I suppose I had better tell you. Naomi was cast a couple of weeks ago. The original actress playing her part fell pregnant and didn't want to commit to a series. She comes in for a table read, and I felt bad for her coming in late because the rest of the main cast had a couple of months together already. Myra knew her and said to avoid her, but I thought, well, I have to work with her should get to know her. We had a chat after the read, then she follows me back to my dressing room and long story short, she takes her shirt off and grabs my cock."

"What did you do?" My green-headed monster was in full battle mode. He better have a good and believable answer.

"I threw her out ." He shrugged. "Shit like that happens all the time. What she doesn't know is that word gets around, and soon she will be seen as toxic and won't get hired. Although I think she aims to bag a guy with money and never work again."

I believed him. I was going to have to get this jealousy thing under control. It was new to me. I don't think I had ever been jealous before, even with Andy. I looked out of the window, letting the night beauty of Sydney calm me down.

Liam put his arm around me and rested his chin on my shoulder. "So was it so terrible?" Liam asked dramatically. "The premiere, I mean."

I looked at him, his blue eyes bright again. "Not all of it," I smiled at him.

"What were the good parts?"

I ran my finger across his jaw, his skin was so smooth. I missed the three-day-growth, but he looked just as amazing without it. "I liked meeting Myra."

He smiled, "I knew you'd like her."

"And the movie was good."

"Anything else?" Liam ran a finger across my collarbone

"The free popcorn and drinks."

Liam chuckled, and his finger ran up my neck. "Anything else?"

"They have great chairs in the theatre," he was turning me on. I heard it in my voice. My heart started to beat louder.

"Is that all?" He asked with his rough, horny voice. He lifted my chin.

"The bathrooms were good too."

He traced my lips with his finger. "Is that all that was good about tonight?"

"Tonight's not over. Ask me again in the morning." He slipped his finger into my mouth, and my body was on fire. Even after all I had been through, the stress and panic, my body still responded to his touch. I sucked his finger gently, and his eyes widened.

"You're very naughty, Lana." He said as he withdrew his finger and shuffled in his seat.

"I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way," I said in my best Jessica Rabbit imitation.

Liam's eyes widened then narrowed. "What did Boyd tell you?"

"Tell me? Nothing?" I tried to look innocent, but I'm not an actress.

"Never mind." Liam blushed.

"Hang on, who is your favourite Disney Princess?"

"I'm not a child, Lana." He looked a little uncomfortable.

I pouted. "Come on. Everyone has one."

"Who is yours?"

"Moana, although I don't know if she counts as a Princess cause she's a chief's daughter. My second is Belle. Tell me yours."

"Ariel." Liam looked out the window.

"Favourite spice girl?"

"I don't like pop music. " I raised my eyebrow at Liam. He paused a long time before answering. "Geri."

"Which one of John Snow's girlfriends was hotter with Ygritte or Daenerys?" I was having fun with it. I don't think I'd ever seen him squirm so much.

"Ygritte, Lana, do you mind?"

"No, no, just one more." I was trying not to burst out laughing. I knew I must have had a huge smirk on my face, "Mary-Anne or Ginger?"

"For fucks sake, yes, ok, I have always had a thing for redheads."

I couldn't hold it any longer, and I burst out laughing. I laughed so hard, Liam eventually had to join in. "I'm sorry." I said, "What are you going to do to Boyd?"

"Unfortunately, Lana, it looks like I will be busy for the next 25 years because I will have to kill him."

Part 20

#original character #original story #original fiction #romantic story #happy ever after

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