#he loves am (the album) and doesn’t get why ppl hate it

[tilebytiles]

it’s worth mentioning my brother becoming an am fan + seeing my humbug vinyl and telling me that’s his fav (because josh homme produced it) + having a convo w him in the car abt his favorite am songs (crying lightning and brianstorm and dangerous animals and do i wanna know) + him telling me he understands the alex turner hype bc he’s attractive (!!!) have all revamped my am fixation. Thank you brother 😝‼️

[radgalniya]

eternal sunshine review

you already knowwww. another album review.

random thoughts:

so the thing is i didn’t have high hopes for this, bc i hated sweetener and people were saying this was like a part 2. and shitting on positions, my favorite ari album, to compare this one. so i’m like i’m gonna hate this. but i am actually so excited bc i like it. i finally have new music to be obsessed w rather than relistening to the same songs over and over.

also just bc i like the album, don’t mean i’m like a homewrecker stan. she gotta chill.

she should’ve kept the red themed cover like i get the message of the new one but it just doesn’t hit the same.

anyways bc i’m a psycopath, i listened out of order bc that’s the only way i can properly listen idk y.

also i love that there’s no musical features

anyways to the review:

intro(end of the world):

it’s a cute lil intro. my everything vibes. 6/10. probably won’t relisten to this one much. but i love how she’s being so honest on this album bc i’m a nosey ass bitch. love when ppl air out their business. more more!

bye:

modern disco viiibes. upbeat. very dancey. but also lyrically it’s very idk not melancholy but like kind of sadish i like that. 7/10. the song is really not my personal taste but it’s really good still.

don’t wanna break up again:

naur he turned up the tv when he heard her crying throw that man in the trash!!! i like this one. i like the melody and lyrics and the chorus is my favorite part of the song. i wish the production was a little more melodic. it only does it for me during the chorus tbh. but i like this song. 8/10 “but i just can’t refuse” in the chorus sounds like the “im finding ways to stay concentrated on what i gotta do” in die for you by the weeknd.

saturn returns interlude:

idk man some woman talking what do you want me to say. isn’t it weird that this is the only track with capital letters tho?

eternal sunshine:

i really hate trap beats tbh. but ik it’s like ari’s signature now. but ick. it’s a bop tho for sure. but not really my taste. i only really like it bc the lyrics. i just love ppl telling their business y’all i’m not kidding. 7/10

supernatural:

AHHHHHH BITCHCHHHH YESSSS THIS IS WTF i’m TALKIN ABOUT THIS IS POP BITCH YESSS 100000/10 i love the modern 80s pop vibe and the chorus is so perfect w/ the beat. it just rides man i love this song. i’d love this album JUST for this song.

true story:

so 90s love it. very aaliyah beat. i love a good 90s r&b moment so ofc this is an automatic like even if the chorus isn’t that catchy. idk ig i just feel like pop should have catchy melodies and/or an infectious beat. y’know? also she ate w/ the belting at the end. 8/10

the boy is mine:

YASSSSSSS. again we know i love a 90s vibe. the slowdown right before the chorus is insaane. and the choral style harmonies on the “is” of the boy is mine scratches something in my brain as well as the “gotta be a reason why” robotic voice thing. this is so catchy. this is totally a fantasize vibe. so good. 10/10

yes and?:

i dont have it in me to keep defending this song from u vultures. AND i wish she put the mariah carey version on the album too 8/10 and no i will not be explaining myself further y’all are gonna make me cry.

we can’t be friends (wait for your love):

feel i’m getting an 80s vibe again. i like it. i’m loving the upbeat music, sadish vibe lyrics thing going on in this album. i like the vibe of this song a lot. i do wish something in here was more catchy. but i like it. it’s so soft and wistful almost. that’s probably why i’ll relisten. conjure up some interesting maladaptive daydreams w/ this one. 7/10 edit: i watched the video now i like it more. 8/10 lol

i wish i hated you:

it’s very vulnerable. again i’m nosey so i like that. but the song is eh for me. i don’t think this is a song i’d listen to for the music but more for the vibe. 6/10

imperfect for you:

i looooove it. a little weird melodically but i love it. just scratches something in my brain it’s so good. so catchy. 10/10

ordinary things:

it’s good. not one of my favorites but the more i listen, the more i like it. i love the way she pronounces ordinary in here lol. 7/10

okay that’s all really

p.s. i feel like why try from my everything would fit in here idk. this album feels like a perfect combination of all of her others, it’s so weird how that works out. i love it tho. pleasantly surprised!!

[romanticnoir]

My opinions on Taemin’s Guilty that no one asked for but I will give anyway.

Very very long post ahead

Taemin came and saved kpop I loved it. His album was truly amazing. I mean no one does it like him.

Every album he’s ever done has been carefully created by him and you can tell he puts his whole heart into each of them. I am extremely proud of him and everything he does. He really loves his art and it feels authentic to himself.

He has restored my love for Korean music that was missing for at least half of this year.

Guilty is the perfect title track he did so well with everything the aesthetic of the video the DANCE????! out of this world I am just so impressed by everything he does. I am not just saying this because he’s one of my ults but because he truly is a talented person who’s passion for his art is just so visible to us who don’t even know him personally. This song is genius I love it the lyrics the beat the dance everything is just perfect.

THE RIZZNESS IM AFRAID THESE TIKTOK GIRLIES JUST DONT FUCKING GET IT UGHHHH I swear to god this song is soooooo good and the dance is so hot like I understand using this word unironically might be silly BUT IT STILL WORKS BECAUSE ITS FUCKING LEE TAEMIN. The audacity to laugh at TAEMIN when your faves be singing shit that makes no sense or proudly saying that songs were written by them and it still be making no sense… and I mean the fact that we know why the hate train was started for Taemin and BY WHO. But I’m not here to talk about untalented ppl who can only go around because they have a pretty face.

She Loves Me She Loves Me Not it’s so good. One of my fave songs in the album the lyrics are my favorite thing I am obsessed with this song. I think it’s not a style we normally hear taemin do and he just pulled it so well.

Not over you is MY FAVORITE SONG. I know everyone have their own interpretations. It’s fine I’ll take it the literal way it sounds and it’s a heartbroken person. I’m a simple minded person who can’t get into deep theories my brain just doesn’t work that way. I love sad songs angsty media is what I live for. I just love the sorrowful sound of this song.

I think placing Night Away after Not Over You is just so perfect because not only is the beat STILL has a deep sad feeling but with a hint of light that even without reading the lyrics you can feel that things might be getting better for that broken heart you can start seeing that light at the end of the tunnel.

And then with Blue it really feels like things will finally be better and good and like he will finally find happiness.

The album starts in a almost angry tone to sad to and an ending with finding peace I absolutely love this album he truly did so great

I truly don’t think there are other idols like Taemin he’s so talented at everything he do. He’s so loved by everyone and it’s like it’s so obviously clear why. He’s really a role model to the newer generations of idols.

Today being the last day for Guilty promo I wanted to talk about the album. I am so proud of Taemin and I truly hope that he can continue to do what he loves more.

[obsessedwithbooksandmusic]

I LOVE ITHK THIS HURTS ME

I feel like this person just hates the album ‘lover’ wtf

HE GOT MY HEARTBEAT SKIPPING DOWN SIXTEENTH AVENUE GOT THAT AH I MEAN WANNA SEE WHAT’S UNDER THAT ATTITUDE LIKE

I WANT YOU BLESS MY SOUL AND I AINT GOTTA TELL HIM I THINK HE KNOWS

LYRICAL SMILE INDIGO EYES HAND ON MY THIGH WE CAN FOLLOW THE SPARKS ILL DRIVE

OMFG NOT SYGB?? IT’S ABOUT HER GODDAMN MUM THEY CANT HATE ON THAT :((( WHY WOULD U EVEN SAY SMT LIKE THAT

AND IT’S SUCH AN AMAZING SONG AS WELL LIKE WHY?

as someone who’s acc had family members deal with these types of issues and have died (my grandparents) it genuinely hurts me cos i’ve cried to this song because of how it is so relatable in detailing those experiences, it’s such an open and vulnerable song to how could they say that :(

OK No but genuinely why do so many ppl not like INTHAF? like it’s so calming and it’s a childhood friends to lovers in song. It’s like folklore’s child, and it gives Jemma and Percabeth too so. like I’ve always liked it and i get softer songs arent everyone’s thing but it’s acc really nice to vibe to.

ALSO ME! GETS DRAGGED A LOT TOO

‘Living in Winter i am your summer, baby doll when it comes to a lover promise that you’ll never find another like ME HE HEE’

againn it’s such a good song, so catchy I can’t get sick of it. Yes Brendon Urie, very problematic, but the song itself is rlly good (omg the live in Paris one tho, soooo good) and plus ppl don’t just hate on him being featured, they hate on the actual song itself, which doesn’t make sense at all

Yes I agree twitter is tasteless and very much needs ✨help✨

it gets worse

so much worse

someone said the following songs are skips...

iftye

the archer ;-;

false god wdkjkhkbsdj

DAYLIGHT (part of my big three in her entire discography???)

ITHK?

sygb (come ON, whatever opinions you have on that song just refrain from commenting because...)

inthaf ....

me!

imagine being this tasteless

NO…they didn’t

THE AUDACITY

IFGTYE?? BUT BUT IT’S SO GOOD

‘It isn’t love it isn’t hate it’s just indifference’ DO THEY NOT LIKE SASS?

NOT THE ARCHER? I HAVE ANXIETY I WILL FIGHT

‘I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost, the room is on fire, invisible smoke and all of my heroes die all alone”

“ALL OF MY ENEMIES STARTED OUT FRIENDS”?

“THEY SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME THEY SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME”

HOW IS THAT MASTERPIECE A SKIP?

NOT FALSE GOD? IT’S DRESS 2.0 HOW CAN U SAY THAT?

‘We were stupid to jump, in the ocean separating us, remember how I’d fly to you?’ ‘They all warned us about times like this, they say the road gets hard when you’re let by blind faith BLIND FAITH’ ‘But we might just get away with it, religion’s in your lips, even if it is a false god.” I COULD GO ON

THEY CANNOT CRITICISE DAYLIGHT IT’S SO PURE AND HAPPY AND SWEET

AND I CAN STILL SEE IT ALL (IN MY MIND)

ALL OF YOU ALL OF ME (INTERTWINED)

I ONCE BELIEVED LOVE WOULD BE (BLACK AND WHITE)

AND I CAN STILL SEE IT ALL (IN MY HEAD)

BACK AND FORTH FROM NEW YORK (SNEAKING IN YOUR BED)

ONCE BELIEVED LOVE WOULD BE (BURNING RED)

BUT IT’S GOLDEN

LIKE DAYLIGHT

‘…you are who you love’

it’s shows how bright love can be how it can make the darkness (AKA WHAT’S MENTIONED IN THE ARCHER)

YH IT’S ONE OF THE BEST SONGS IN HER DISCOGRAPHY FOR ME TOO

I’m gonna reblog cos I’m gonna do the other songs but it’s gonna be long asf

[ialwaysknewyouwerepunk]

perfect now - a close reading

only pure and true love for this one. it’s soft and sweet because the one he wrote it for is and needs cheesy uncool romcom soundtrack-worthy affirmations and it’s the most wonderful thing oh my the flurries 

some album booklet art for your viewing pleasure

((just a warning for below: while the lyric analysis was kept fairly neutral and close to the words and their meaning, more and more parallels did ensure me larrying out by the time the analysis kicked off so if you’re not into that, you can skip this one!))

⟼ check out @bluewinnerangel​ ‘s magnificent post with all the parallels to 1d/h&l bc it’s exhaustive and was a source for mine <3 thank you again for your service <3 bc this song really is a fanpiece of every song that has been important to them throughout their career so far, whether they wrote it or not, and it’s honestly kinda impressive

SUMMARY

you’re sad and i love you so much i will do anything to make that undone but while you’re sad know that i sill very much love you and you’re also strong enough to conquer all of this on your own but i’ll be by your side anyway

lyric breakdown ft. the many parallels, incl. little things, through the dark and wmyb

what this says about louis, his partner and the relationship he is in

never gonna dance again frenzy

identity 

louis is a marvellous majestic sonofabitch basically <3

walls, track 10

～ little things “you still have to squeeze into your jeans, but you’re perfect to me”

You don’t feel pretty and it’s hard to miss

You don’t feel pretty and it’s hard to miss

later lyric: “like a neon sign” - i see through you trying to hide away your insecurities

I wish that you could see my point of view As someone staring back at you

“you” is also staring at him, but perhaps is too insecure to realise how mutual the adoration is

i wish i could get you out of your own negative spiral and give you a look at yourself from my perspective

～ wmyb “everyone else in the room can see it, everyone else but you” 

～ wmyb “right now i’m looking at you and i can’t believe you don’t know you’re beautiful”

～ little things “you never love yourself half as much as I love you, and you’ll never treat yourself right darling but I want you to. If I let you know, I’m here for you, maybe you’ll love yourself like I love you”

On Friday night when we’re all out I turn to you and you’re looking down And you don’t wanna dance I know you love to dance You never stop given half the chance

heavy echoes of kmm again, but the opposite: the “nightmare on the dance floor” doesn’t want to dance

when “you” is confident rlly not being subtle with who i think that is, they love to dance <-> tpwk “feeling good in my skin, i just keep on dancing”

“i know you love to dance” = i know what you love bc i love you

“given half the chance” 

～ tpwk “giving/given second chances”

given a chance tattoo, making another appearance (see below for more tattoo meltdowns)

Just keep your head up, love, keep your head up

term of endearment <3 

～ dlibyh

this album is full of encouragement to keep going and as much as it gives me life it ruins me 

Don’t hide away, don’t ever change

“be happy, proud”

～ “just hold on”

“pick someone who’s supportive”

Keep your head up, love, keep your head up Don’t look away, don’t look away

don’t look away from me

～ through the dark “and I can see your head is held in shame”

Cause everybody’s looking at you now, my, oh my

they have the stage to themselves / new career paths they’re doing on their own

could also mean ppl they’re going out with are looking at them, which “you” interprets as sth negative, which makes them self-conscious, while they’re actually admiring them bc they steal the scene

～ wmyb “you’re turning heads when you walk through the door”

I guess some queens don’t need a crown And I know why Even when your tears are falling down Still, somehow, you’re perfect now

“you” is royalty to louis, to put it simply 

they don’t need something on their head to make it known to everyone else - they’re a queen and everyone knows it

gendered: female - also used in drag contexts - the only time L has used any gendered word to identify his partner on the entire album (more on this below)

～ steal my girl "she's been my queen since we were sixteen" can't believe i forgot this one thank you @mortalenemiestolovers for reminding me!!!

～ falling

～ through the dark “you tell me that your tears are here to stay”

You never do, but if you asked me to I’ll tell the truth lying next to you

“you” never asks for affirmations directly, but by saying shit like their pants are too tight make it clear enough to L that they do need to hear once in a while that it’s not true

Cause you’re the only one when it’s said and done You make me feel like being someone 

Good to you even at your worst

～ always you

i love you so much you are a force of life to me, and even when you hate me i want more

～ drag me down “If I didn’t have you there would be nothing left, the shell of a man who could never be his best. If I didn’t have you, I’d never see the sun. You taught me how to be someone” (sung by louis first, harry second) 

～ through the dark “even if you scream and shout, it’ll come back to you and I’ll be here for you

You steal the scene and it’s unrehearsed

reference to working on a stage - their natural presence wins everyone over - that charisma is never manufactured

Don’t you wanna dance? Just a little dance I’ll never stop given half the chance

L keeps encouraging them, will also not pass by any chance to dance with them

Every insecurity, like a neon sign, as bright as day If you knew what you were to me You would never try to hide away

“it’s hard to miss”

L sees through them trying to hide their insecurities, pretend to be strong

～ through the dark “but I know you were only hiding”

SYNTHESIS

Perfect Now is not a fan favorite and I am so not here for that discourse, so please do not pester me with negativity about this chocolate drop of a song. 

As others have pointed out, the parallels with other songs written by Louis, Harry or for One Direction are extremely present. Especially Little Things is echoed loudly, but there’s so much more to be read, as you’ve seen. These are songs that are clearly near and dear to Louis, bc he wrote them or bc performing them was special, like with Little Things and What Makes You Beautiful. A lot of the same emotions come back in Louis’s writing, so much so that you can’t help but see the larger story behind it all. Throughout Walls you can hear him singing about not giving up and holding your head high despite hardships, and if you look back at his earlier writing, it’s always been there. Through the Dark is an early and striking example of this style of Louis song: you’re sad and i love you so much i will do anything to make that undone but while you’re sad know that i sill very much love you and you’re also strong enough to conquer all of this on your own but i’ll be by your side anyway 

basically through the dark’s chorus:

Oh, I will carry you over Fire and water for your love And I will hold you closer Hope your heart is strong enough When the night is coming down on you We will find a way Through the dark

It is very clear that Louis is faced with a partner - I can freely say it’s Harry now right? are the antis gone by now? i think so - that struggles with his body, with his identity, with how he wants to present himself vs how opinions on that might push him down and dampen his spirit. Louis, always the supportive boyfriend, then tries his best to make him see the light, while keeping that space for his sadness, his struggles, or their joint struggles. Accept the sadness but don’t lose your heart to it.

I’ve linked @bluewinnerangel​ ‘s post at the start of this post, but I need to stress how good it is once more as I also shamelessly insert a screenshot from it here bc it makes me feel a lot and summarizes perfectly just how deeply Perfect Now is woven into the history of their lives, relationship and especially “you”s/Harry’s personal struggle with their identity/body/confidence...

Because yes, i absolutely think these tattoos are being echoed in the song. “Never gonna dance again” as a lyric and then as a tattoo on Harry’s legs like shackles around his ankles represents the sensation of shame, of being stuck, bc of your desires, bc of your sexuality. Obviously we can never know why Harry got the tattoo, as in what experience pushed him to choose those lyrics or what exactly he recognizes in himself, but it’s safe to say it’s about the struggles of being queer and navigating relationships with that identity and with others.

Most importantly, the sense of shamelessly dancing, dancing like no one’s watching, dancing together with your lover, as a celebration of self, life, love, is the key here. Harry got that tattoo ages ago, at a time when he undoubtedly felt way more stuck. When he couldn’t dance freely the way he wanted to and with whom he wanted to. Perfect Now is a reminder to him, an encouragement to still dance if he wants to, no matter what people say or think. Significantly, then, Harry’s own Treat People With Kindness heavily features that same sentiment, but in an extremely positive light: i have found a place (in life and in myself) where i feel like i have given and was given second chances and now i dance bc i finally feel good in my skin.

Louis has obviously been there from the start, or at least from when or before Harry properly started experimenting with/questioning how he likes to present and how he identifies as. Before he ever dared to consider pulling on a pair of women’s skinny jeans, never mind a ball gown. Louis has seen him limit himself as well as being limited by others ofc and has always seemed to have been there, with a secure hand on Harry’s back, to encourage him. Even at a time when boys wearing nail polish or skirts was unthinkable. Just remember how much encouragement Harry needed when growing out his hair; Louis literally joined him. yes this might make me cry okay i need to stop bc i’m going off track and this is just becoming a larry breakdown while i was trying to hype up this beautiful song. 

What I’m trying to say is: Louis has always seen all of Harry. He’s always had his back, no matter what. He’s loved every part of him. And now, on a completely gender neutral album, in the sweetest, softest song off of the entire thing, Louis puts in the word “queen”, and that is so very deliberate it makes me want to scream. It’s Louis confirming his love again and again while affirming the multitudes contained by Harry, including everything involving his gender journey. brb crying

It’s a raw Louis, an honest, sweet, kind, loving partner, and both of them are fucking lucky to have each other, and I also wish that all of us end up in a caring and wholesome relationship like that. I truly do.

[transcrowing]

ranking the second drb solos because i hate myself i guess. sorry for long ass post idk how to read more on mobile

18-2die4

rio. rio. honey. ily. but what are you doing 🥲 he sounds so LIFELESS like yeah yeah whatever you’re crazy m you’re crazy m

17-Uncrushable

mtc kinda fucked themselves with this album huh. i don’t mind it too much only bc the instrumental goes hard

16-School of IKB

it’s? okay? jiro as a character doesn’t fit it that well though this means war is way better for him. why didn’t they give this to someone like rosho (obviously not the same lyrics but the overall Energy)

15-You Are, Therefore I Am

again a good song that could be given to a different character. also it sounds like jakurai’s about to tell me i need jesus

14-Requiem

i feel like if i rank this any lower saburo will chop my dick off that’s the vibe this song gives. it’s fine. chorus bangs rest is alright

13-Calyx

shit’s boring at points but gentaro actually fits the song’s vibe and the chorus fucks so

12-Moonlight Shadow

i love rock music. a lot. and DAMN did my man jyushi deliver. not much else to say! good song .

11-Sougyaran BAM

okay this is SUCH a banger! kuko’s very rowdy and feral and an angry ass cat and this works for him. haaa rurururu nani amirite ladies

10-Pink-Colored Love

poor fucking ramuda man. but hey he produced a banger so who am i to judge

9-One and Two, and Law

GOD IDK WHAT IT IS ABT THIS SONG JSHSHS it’s catchy as shit and i also just adore hitoya

8-Scramble Gamble

the instrumental is SO GOOD and dice can spit asf! it’s very chaotic imo which works for him!

7-Own Stage

im gonna be real this would be like tenth but the lyrics are gay as shit and i love it. also im in love with rosho so what are you gonna do ig

6-FACES

REI AMAYADO MY BELOVED HUSBAND . ppl hate this song and i guess i get why but it’s v catchy and the chorus is so good and i aaaaa dh are best division literally fuck you /lh

5-Tragic Transistor

i have three hands theyre all for dotsuhon. clown music for a clown man! also him roasting the other divisions at the end shot this up like three places

4-Break the Wall

WOOOOO WE GETTIN FUNKYYYYY also the chorus being in english caught me off guard at first but i love it. power of friendship go brr

3-Gangsta’s Paradise

as much as i meme on samautotune it sounds REALLY NICE and samatoki went OFF my god i love you king

2-Black or White

DOPPO SING MORE CHALLENGE!! i mean like he did in the chorus but also just more doppo in general. we also got Quality Doppo Screams™️ . im down bad ily king keep whispering ominously in my ear please

1-Don’t Stop the Party

see this is funny bc matenrou is only like my fourth favorite division but this is such a bop man. it’s literally my top played song for the past month i loop it constantly. hifumi and doppo are the power couple of the 2nd drb albums and i applaud them

[c0rpsedemon]

i am curious, as someone who’s only exposure to arthurania was reading jane yolen’s young merlin as a child, would you mind saying why hnoc is a bad adaptation? i’m super curious but no worries if not <3

this has been sitting in my inbox for months bc i kept telling myself i needed to write a full essay with proof from medieval lit to make myself feel smarter.  however, since i’ve recently lost all credibility bc i can’t articulate points to save my life, and since i’ve realized that i could answer this in a just a couple paragraphs, now seems like the right time to answer this ask. sorry for the wait.

under a cut bc length

also warnings for mentions of racism bc this is hnoc we're talking abt and sexual assault bc this is med lit we're also talking abt

the basic problems are pendragon polycule itself, the story beats of the album, the fridging and lack of characterization of morgan le fay, the clear influence of pop culture arthuriana, and whatever the fuck happened with gawain/e.

pendragon polycule is... just not a good take.  there’s a bit in the lancelot-grail abt arthur viewing lancelot like a son (and lancelot not giving a shit abt him).  also arthur knew his parents for years before lancelot was even born.  plus lancelot just Doesn’t care abt him and i can’t stress this part enough.  arthur repeatedly tries to have guinnevere killed, mostly in the lancelot-grail, and guinn didn’t really have any say in marrying him bc she was a teenager.  lancelot and guinnevere is a lot better but that’s not saying much.  guinn doesn’t exactly treat lancelot too well... like at all, BUT it’s not intrinsic to their relationship and is completely caused by medieval misogyny and i’m all in favor of modern retellings saying fuck that.  but also lancelot has multiple pseudo-canon boyfriends (this is med lit after all), and one pseudo-canon husband so like... there were better options.  (also lancelot’s husband is basically in a lavender marriage with guinnevere’s maybe girlfriend who most authors just eventually forget abt as the story progresses).

this next one is a problem with a lot of modern arthurian works bc the inclusion of elayne of astolat is too much to ask apparently.  the grail quest isn’t tied to the fall of camelot, it just happens to be one of the last grand adventures the knights of the round table have.  the event that traditionally sets off the fall is the death of the maiden of astolat/the lady of shalott/elayne of escolat/she has a lot of names, her story has a few variations but usually she either is cursed to stay in a tower and weave and only be able to see the outside world through a mirror positioned across from her window, until lancelot rides by and she rushes to see him out of the actual window and her mirror shatters, setting off her death, or she lives with her father and brothers and takes care of lancelot bc he was injured for a time and she gets to go on adventures to find him and she’s friends with gawaine and she dies bc lancelot rejects her and this version’s a lot more fun but also more happens which makes it harder to explain.  the way her story ends however, is that she dies after she makes arrangements for a glorious boat to drift from astolat to camelot carrying nothing but her dead body and a letter explaining that she died of love for lancelot du lac and the court mourns the death of such a beautiful and young maiden (her age varies a lot but i’ve always read her as a young teenager at most).  but the important thing is, camelot is doomed from the moment she washes up on its shore bc she’s an omen of the end and has symbolic meaning and all that, the maiden of astolat washes up on camelot’s shores, the court mourns the loss of a maiden in her prime and she marks the end of camelot’s prime as well, morgan le fay reappears after being presumed dead and warns arthur of guinnevere and lancelot’s affair, aggravaine and modred conspire to bring lancelot and guinnevere’s affair to light, they succeed but lancelot escapes, guinnevere is to be burnt at the stake and lancelot rescues her, killing aggravaine, gaheris and gareth (gawaine’s brothers) in the process, gawaine drags his uncle and camelot to war bc he was driven mad due to the loss of his brothers, lancelot accidentally kills gawaine, his best friend and maybe boyfriend (i have RECEIPTS), and gawaine forgives him on his detahbed while lancelot and guinn rejoin arthur, meanwhile modred, who practically had the throne handed to him, usurps and invites the saxons in, camlann happens, and camelot is destroyed.  no where in there is the grail quest.

morgan le fay is honestly the most questionable part of the album bc there’s not a single text where she dies.  like....  at least with eurydice in udad she died in the original... there’s no basis for morgan dying.  also she is NOT modred’s mother and anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar, she interacts with him once in the vulgate bc she had three of her nephews over and that’s IT.  it’s a horrible take which originated in the mists of avalon by marion zimmer bradley who is an honest to god monster for reasons i don’t want to trigger tag this post for.  also she’s one of the most dynamic and thought-out characters in the entire canon and they just made her a watered down morgause (modred’s actual mother, morgan’s sister, canonical milf)... there was no reason for it to be her apart from the fact that she’s more well known......

pop culture arthuriana is,,, one of my least favorite things.  no, morgan wasn’t modred’s mother, no, morgause wasn’t abusive but her husband sure was implied to be, no, aggravaine didn’t kill his mother, that was gaheris, he loved his mother, you’re only saying that bc he has a reputation as the “evil” orkney, no, the once and future king is not a good descriptor for arthur, stop making me read it, no, morgause wasn’t the one to initiate the thing with arthur resulting in modred, no, lancelot and arthur weren’t friends, no, tristan wasn’t a self-centered asshole, tennyson is a fucking liar, no, galahad didn’t have sex or want to, he’s one of the first ever explicitly asexual characters out there, no, galahad’s conception was NOT consensual, lancelot was tricked, and no, elayne of astolat wasn’t galahad’s mother, she’s implied to be younger than him.  those are just the big glaring ones, but i swear it’s bc of arthuriana’s reputation as a mythology and the connotations belonging to that word (no one true canon (which is true but there are still things that just AREN’T canon, not completely written down, passed by oral tradition) that causes ppl to see mediocre modern texts and go “oh. well this is abt as close to the original as i’m going to get” and don’t bother to look into so much as malory (who i only name bc he’s one of the most well known medieval authors with the most commonly used storylines, don’t read malory kids, he’s a mediocre-at-best writer even by medieval standards).  the big perpetrators of modern arthurian tropes are the books the once and future king by th wh*te, who is a shitty person and lets it bleed into his writing (which isn’t like... nice to read or anything, seriously why do ppl love this book so much it doesn’t have redeeming qualities), and the mists of avalon by marion zimmer bradley (it’s poorly written, the story is a mess, and mzb is honestly a monster and one google search will tell you that), and unfortunately the writings of tennyson, which are mostly good but he clearly didn’t read the povest (a later text that’s also my favorite, known for significantly improving ppl’s opinions on tristan, isolde and co.) before deciding he hated both tristan and isolde and he has HORRIBLE takes on them.  high noon over camelot is SEEPED in pop culture arthuriana and i think it would have been so much better if the band had read so much as a SUMMARY of the events of le morte.  it’s evident in the song “the once and future king” bc it’s,,,, literally named after one of the worst books in existence.  it’s shown in the morgan le fay thing, and it’s shown in the pendragon polycule thing.  and hell, i think you can even explain away the lack of elayne of astolat with pop culture arthuriana, bc ppl have had bad takes on her ever since th wh*te combined her character with that of ela*ne of corbenic, and the band probably went “huh, let’s write lancelot’s abuser out of this” and they would’ve been right to do so if that’s who elayne of astolat was.

the final big issue is gawaine, the closest thing the genre has to a protagonist, he’s pretty much canon bi and, in some texts, arospec, he’s a dashing knight of great reknown and he derails every romance to steal hearts, commit murder, and make out with every knight and lady mentioned.  and in hnoc he’s... racist.  that’s it.  it’s,,, almost completely unfounded by the arthurian canon and shows a major misunderstanding of his motivations (like i said earlier, he wants to avenge his brothers bc there’s a reoccuring motif of how much the orkneys value family).  i say almost bc in one text it’s his motivations for killing palomydes but i’ve never heard it mentioned by name bc that’s just what it’s known for.  most arthuriana fans just look away from it except when critiquing hnoc but that one text is an outlier, shouldn’t be counted, and i highly doubt the mechs made hnoc gawain how he is bc they found this text.  it’s just a bad text.

hnoc has,,, quite a few more minor issues, such as villainized ladies of the lake (their ONLY crimes were sealing away merlin bc he tried to assault teenage nimue/ninniane (proto-nimue/vivianne from the vulgate), and that one time vivviane/ninniane kidnapped adopted baby lancelot), assigning brain to merlin (y’know,,, the predator who helped arrange the [redacted] of arthur’s mother and tried to assault a teenager,,,) although merlin is portrayed in a positive light throughout modern arthuriana so i don’t think they knew, giving a song to pellinore, who my perception of has been forever altered bc i was introduced to him through malory and the explanation of torre’s conception, which you can just look up “sir torre arthurian” to find out abt if you can’t just Guess, if they wanted a song abt the questing beast palomydes was Right There AND has been associated with the questing beast for longer, but once again i don’t think they knew.

also namedropping a bunch of knights in the fiction is... it Suggests a bigger world full of all these other stories but they just don’t work bc the world of hnoc wasn’t designed in a way where the appearance of half these characters would make sense.  like,, tristan is referenced as dying in the grail quest in the same sentence as bedevere (one of the characters who is known for almost always surviving), but tristan Isn’t one of the knights who dies on the grail quest, his possible deaths (ignoring the potentially happy ending of the povest for a second) are either being murdered by his uncle, king mark (bc mark married tristan’s gf to try and get tristan killed and also to spite him), bc he was driven into a fury bc of tristan and isolde’s affair, or he’s injured and only isolde (the best healer in the world) can save him so he sends for her and if the ship he sent for her is supposed to fly white sails if she’s there, or black sails if she’s not, and the ship flies white sails but his wife (also named isolde) says it’s black sails (the why depends but usually comes down to jealousy), and so he gives up bc he thinks all hope is lost and usually succumbs to his injuries, either way isolde dies of a broken heart over his body.  there’s no way for the tristan and isolde story to play out like it’s supposed to in the world of hnoc, just as there’s no way for any story with gawaine (and Oh Boy are there a lot of stories with gawaine) or pretty much anyone else, without severely altering the canon.

of course, there are still parts of hnoc i like a lot, most of the music i adore and i just like the idea of space cowboys and the secret good hnoc that lives in my head.  and it has one of my favorite characterizations of galahad, even though galahad hnoc is nothing like galahad arthuriana.  it’s not GOOD but i like it and it’s fun to turn my brain off too, and i’ll always value it as my introduction to arthuriana.

also there are modern arthurian tropes i do like such as characters being genre-savvy/knowing they’re fictional/knowing they’ve done this before (which hnoc does wonderfully!) and bedevere-as-the-storyteller (everyone say thank you lord tennyson).

WOW that was longer than expected, i feel very passionately abt this, when i was planning to write a fully sourced essay i meant to include a bit at the bottom with recommendations to get into better arthuriana and i think i’ll keep that in this post.

if you like hnoc for the arthurian music i’d like to suggest heather dale’s arthurian music to you, she does occasionally fall into the trap of modern arthuriana (some parts of lancelot and arthur being close, morgan as modred’s mother), sometimes she’s just wrong (galahad at lancelot’s trial, a lot of tristan and isolde), and her stuff is kinda straightwashed sometimes (sir gawain and the green knight, for example) but i’d be lying if it wasn’t catchy, and it’s not quite as bad as hnoc adaptation-wise.  culwch and olwen is pretty accurate (albeit abridged bc culwch and olwen has SO many tangents), as is lily maid (it’s abt elayne of astolat!).

if you liked hnoc for king arthur... in space! then may i recommend to you my own fanfic? it's not posted yet but the second i finish writing the first chapter i'm going to make a Big Deal out of it that'll be impossible to miss!

if you want to learn abt arthuriana through tumblr-osmosis like i did at first, i’d like to recommend the love of my life @acegalahads, first and foremost (it’s me on a sideblog i’m just obsessed with myself), and i can’t recommend my arthuriana mutuals over there, @/gringolet, @/merlinenthusiast, @/jcbookworm, @/elayneofshalott, and @/elaineofascolat (the elayne urls have been popular recently), also i know for a fact that my mutual-in-law, @/itonje makes great arthuriana posts that i look forwards to whenever i open the tag.

here are a few good reference posts, a quick guide to the characters, a guide to characters of color, and a much more comprehensive intro to arthuriana post with even more texts linked to it.

if you want to ease into med lit, i’d like to introduce you to pre-raphaelite poetry, alfred lord tennyson and william morris are my favorites, although tennyson can’t be trusted with tristan and isolde.  the poem the lady of shalott is basically a rite of passage for arthuriana fans, although when it comes to tennyson’s writings abt elayne of astolat, i prefer lancelot and elaine, which is part of his much larger story, idylls of the king.  for morris, don’t trust what he says abt aggravaine killing his mother, but my favorites of his are sir galahad, a christmas mystery, which sounds like a shitty disney sequel, and palomyde’s quest, which i blame for my love of palomydes (that and the one bit of the povest where he asks tristan to be his greatest enemy and that he wants nothing more, gay ppl,,,,).

if you want to read abt lancelot and his husband, there’s the lancelot-grail cycle, which i believe was taken off of archive dot org and i think i found it on @/tobeisexhausting’s blog but don’t quote me on that.

the povest, which was a religious experience for me and i can’t reccomend enough if you want to like tristan and isolde, is here, i don’t know who scanned it but i think i found it on @/lanzelet’s blog

the dutch texts are just good in general, here’s a link to their section of a(n unfinished) site for hosting various texts by my former mutual @/reynier (who’s no longer on tumblr).  i’d like to recommend lancelot and the white hart specifically bc it’s mainly just just gawaine being gay for lancelot.

if you want older works, here’s my scan of the history of the kings of britain, and here’s culwch and olwen and pa gur.

oh wow this is even longer than i thought it would be so i’m going to wrap this up by saying that i always love to talk abt arthuriana more than anything if you have any questions or just are curious!

[jkflesh]

Interview with jesu January 2021 New Noise magazine #56

Read the interview by Antoine "Neredude" Duprez below:

The “Terminus” Bandcamp page states that the album was done between 2016 and 2020. That's a long period in your standards! Did you get some sort of writer's block with Jesu? Or was it because you were so busy with your numerous projects?

— I never get writers block, I just simply move on to the next thing if I’m not currently inspired to work on a specific project. Most my records, for many years, have been written and recorded over extended periods of time; I work when inspiration strikes, when it doesn’t I move onto the next thing; there’s never a block for me with creation generally, maybe just specific areas. i take large breaks for my music so as to afford some sort of distance, gone are the times when an album would be hammered out in a month!

''When I Was Small'' has kind of a Radiohead thing in the vocals, whereas ''Alone'' reminds me a lot of Sigur Rós. Are those bands part of your background?

— Ok, interesting observation, but no Radiohead is not an influence on this song, the biggest influences on the vocals were Liam Gallagher from Oasis, and subconsciously "White Flag" by Godflesh (which I only discovered after the album was complete). I do love some Radiohead though, as I do Sigur Rós, but neither band is a direct or conscious influence. Musically “When I was Small” was mostly influenced by trying to recreate a vibe of early Neil Young mixed with Oasis, in a jesu fashion, coupled with a demo production; intentionally underproduced. I’m not sure where a lot of the influence on “Alone” came from, electronic pop music for sure, short and sweet was the intention, driven entirely by the voice sample.

Regarding “Terminus,” did you set yourself a framework or musical approach beforehand like you did for “Every Day I Get Closer to the Light From Which I Came?“

— Not really no, generally when I work on a bunch of songs things will fall into place naturally, the songs become a whole and then collectively the songs will become conceptual as i write, they build their own logic, so to speak, I don’t force anything, I let things happen organically as I write and record.

I think around 2013, you said “Every Day I Get Closer to the Light From Which I Came” was going to set a precedent for the next album. Now that it's out, do you still think so? Personally, even though both records are different, I can definitely hear a connection.

— Yeah, shame it took 7 years to come to fruition! And many things changed over those 7 years, as ever. Jesu certainly documents my personal journey in life, it’s ultra personal, Godflesh is much more external comparatively. A lot to the solo jesu work took a backseat when I worked on the collaborations with Sun Kil Moon, but that was very refreshing and inspired me to take jesu further, I had notions of discontinuing the project at some point, but the collabs with Sun Kil Moon inspired me to keep pursuing jesu.

"Every Day I Get Closer to the Light From Which I Came” was inspired in great part by you becoming a father. Can you tell us a bit about what was on your mind when you wrote “Terminus?”

— That’s very true, especially the initial journey of bringing life into the/our world. everything is there in the lyrics and artwork for "Terminus" so of course, like a lot of my work, depends on the listeners perspectives, they can make it their own, make it personal. But it’s essentially about endings, and my obsession with finality, my sensitivity to it and my fear of it. There’s a line in the title song that says “my end, our end, the end, the end”, which pretty much sums it up.

The EP “Never” you released before “Terminus” is quite different and more focused on electronics. I remember you telling me that you liked going experimental on EPs, doing stuff you wouldn't do on a full length. So I figure that's still the case?

— Yeah, I like experimenting with everything, I like satisfying myself with different ideas, obviously that doesn’t suit my listeners too much, but I make this music for myself, and I’m always trying to do better. I still don’t know why I put myself through the trial and hell of releasing music, I often think about just recording for myself and not bothering with an audience, but I’m not really capable of earning money in other ways, so I have to finish music and release it, let it go. For me "Never" was just another way of interpreting the jesu mood, nothing deviates too much from the original intention of the project. It’s weird, critically, it was perceived as this big electronic departure, whereas jesu has sounded pretty much like this most of it’s lifetime! “Pale Sketches", "Lifeline" even "Silver” is all mostly electronic, save a real drum loop in the song "Silver", but this EP seemed to get this thing that its all electronic, whereas it;’s no more electronically oriented than any other jesu record I have made. jesu is a mood that can be explored and experimented with, I’m not making the first album over and over, some can’t get over that, but that was a different moment in my life which I captured, and as an artist who challenges oneself besides the audience you can never win, and one will generally never win hah. This is a new jesu, it comes with age, transitions. "Never" was intentionally idiosyncratic and deliberately fvcked up sounding, and I think by and large critically the subtleties were lost on people.

“Never” features two version of ''Never There for You'', one of them described as the ''original vision''. Can you explained how you ended up releasing two version of this song?

— The “original vision” existed like that since around 2010, I shelved it, it was to be a Pale Sketcher song, I had an album’s worth of similar songs, I still do, couldn’t decide if they should be jesu or Pale Sketcher. I sent them to Aphex Twin / Richard James because he was a huge fan of the Pale Sketcher EP “Seventh Heaven”, we were talking about a release on his label Rephlex, I had all these songs that were floating between jesu and Pale Sketcher. But then he folded Rephlex for good, a real shame, so I was left with all these songs in limbo, I still am, but at that period I shelved them all. I returned to them around 2018 and started adding guitars and vocals, thinking that they will now definitely be jesu songs. “Never There for You” was one of them, so I wanted the listener to hear what it was originally before I added more of organic me. I’m working on finalising all those songs for Rephlex into future jesu, probably an album that I hope to release late 2021, it’s not a "Terminus" though, and probably most ppl will hate it hah.

“Terminus” is the first album to feature Ted Parsons in a long while. Did you invite him because you felt these songs needed his touch?

— I wanted some live drums, 3 songs only. I was going to play them myself, like on "Opiate Sun". "Infinity" etc, but I really wanted Ted involved and see how he interpreted my drum parts, he always swings something and makes it interesting. he’s a very real drummer, and a very real human being.

When touring is possible again, would you like to tour with Jesu, with Ted on drums?

— I may tour solo, with electronics and projections. The band thing is tiresome and always just sounds like a band, bands bore me these days because of the constraints of the instruments, rock records also bore me these days; same productions, etc, very little actual aesthetic, but its popular and what do I know. But I’d rather jesu now sound hugely expansive live, not just like a rock band. But i’m still unsure. Live drums swallow my voice live, I can’t sing above them, and jesu is a tiny project, can’t play big venues with stage separation and screens around the drums, and 8 guys diving around onstage, it’s not affordable. I stopped performing as jesu for some time due to all those reasons.

You said “Silver” is probably your favourite Jesu record. Are there other Jesu albums that stand out in your mind?

— Did I say that?! Haha. I don’t recall, and that opinion changes every day I feel. I like how concise and all encompassing "Silver" is; it covers most of the ground that I feel the project should cover. But "Terminus" is my favourite jesu album, and it should be, otherwise I would not feel I was moving forward, and I feel I am, it is the best jesu album I have made.

Last year, you told Olivier ''Zoltar'' Badin that the next Zonal album would probably go in the direction of it's title track ''Wrecked''. Is it still true to this day and what can you tell us about that upcoming album?

— Well, a lot of time has passed since, but I think Kevin and I are still quite struck on that song as a template for future recordings, although everything changes all the time, of course, and time is passing fast once again, we haven’t discussed Zonal in some time.

I know you don't actually consider yourself as a guitarist. With you focusing on your electronic projects like JK Flesh and Zonal lately, do you ever get tired of guitar? I'm asking this because I recently discussed the subject with Steven Wilson. He basically told me that after 30 years writing and doing gigs with guitar, he's feeling more creative and excited when writing music on other instruments and I wondered if you ever felt something similar.

— All instruments are just a means to an end for me; a tool for the bigger job, I don’t really wish to be overly proficient at any instrument, I liked that about punk, and it’s what I’m not that fond of about overly progressive music, it’s like it’s for show, I don’t do anything for show, I’d rather be shit than great, it’s more interesting, it reflects the human condition, imperfection. I don’t wish for things to sound perfect, whatever that is, people should not come to my music for that, they probably don’t and it’s probably why my audience is so small haha.

I recently discovered that you worked with Josh Eustis with the mastering of the JK Flesh / Orphx live album and was a bit surprised. How did that happen?

— Josh is a very good friend of Dominick Fernow’s (Prurient / Vatican Shadow / Hospital Productions, etc), and Dominick is a very close friend of mine. I was aware that Josh does very good mastering besides being an extremely talented artist, so Dominick suggested josh master that collaboration, and it sounds excellent!

I interviewed Lee Dorrian some time ago and we were talking about the impact Napalm Death had, not just the band itself but all the bands who were formed after playing in that band: Godflesh, Carcass, Cathedral, Scorn... Lee thought this legacy had a lot to do with John Peel broadcasting a wide array of music on young aspiring musicians. How would you explain such creativity and versatility from musicians who all played in Napalm Death at one point?

—  Lee is absolutely correct, a lot of very young kids listened to John Peel, most generations did, his taste exposed music to many of us who were already enquiring at a young age that we would not have heard anywhere else and of course back then this centralised things, not fragmented them like the internet does; a kid now can absorb an artist entire catalog in an hour, speed listen to it all, then have an opinion, but it’s informed, no context, no history, no experience. We heard music then on Peel and then hunted it down. It took work, valuable work that paid dividends. Peel’s broad appreciation of eternally subversive music and otherwise told us that music didnt need to exist in such strict compartments, that’s it’s all part of a greater whole, so when groups of musicians collaborated even at such young ages, our tastes were informed and wide, very rarely singular.

Can you tell us a bit about you latest remixing output? What were the tracks that you enjoyed the most remixing? Those are the names I could find: Full of Hell, Oathbreaker and a lot of projects I've never heard of.

— I always and love to remix, I love the fact that I didn’t create this music but can make something new from someone else’s work. Music is endless, for me, it’s just when you wish to end it, but ultimately it can never end. I have some remixes that I love moire than others, but only over time, I never let a remix go unless I am as happy as can be with it. Sometimes I would’ve loved to have done more, my Killing Joke remix is a good example of that, I wanted to go further, but Youth of Killing Joke told me they were happy with where I was at, I think I could’ve made it much better. The Oathbreaker remix you mentioned is a favourite of mine from the last years worth of my remixes. I’ll remix anyone, if they can afford my fee and I have the time!

I'm curious, since you released some of your music with your own label with Godflesh, Jesu and other projects, did it have an impact on the revenue you got from streaming platforms like Spotify, compared to albums released on Earache or Hydra Head? I'm asking this in the light of the neverending controversy regarding streaming revenue for musicians.

— On my own label more money can be earned from these services due to no split with another label, which usually would be 50/50, but streaming is very small as is common knowledge. I never see any royalties from Earache so can’t compare their rates etc since Godflesh is constantly recouping an advance from Columbia / Sony for the "Selfless" album that Earache, contractually, can recoup from, even though they didn’t give the advance, so they’re making money from the band and from an advance they never paid, which these days you would think that besides being unethical that it would be criminal, but such were the contracts in the 80’s / 90’s. So I’ve never seen a single penny from streaming with Earache!

I know it might be pointless to ask you, since someone's mind can change with time but do you still think “Post Self” may be your last album with Godflesh? Your told us last year that you weren't sure if you had enough in you creatively to do another album and also that the constant screaming was a bit harder to do.

— Hah, the shouting/screaming live now takes its toll, it does with age, I’m unsure due to not performing for so long thanks to the pandemic how my voice would be for Godflesh now in a live setting, I’d have very little problem in the studio. I’m still struck on the fact that there may not be another full length studio album from Godflesh, I haven’t been inspired to initiate one for numerous reasons, and I don’t wish for us to repeat ourselves in any way, I do have a lot of interesting old material though, some good rare stuff, demos, “Us and Them in Dub” which is also in the works, but I work on that sporadically, when I feel inspired to do so. So there’s a lot of good stuff coming.

Last time I interviewed you in 2014, Aphex Twin was making his grand return with “Syro”. I remember you telling me that the album was still shrinkwrapped on your desk. Knowing you're a big Aphex fan, I wanted to know if you liked that album, especially knowing that a lot of fans were disappointed by it.

— Ahh it was such a long time ago now that we spoke last! I love "Syro”, but I love Aphex, and since I first heard "Didgeridoo" when it was released and then "Quoth", he will always be a favourite, "Syro" may not be an Aphex favourite for me, but it’s still amazing, he is amazing; creative, subversive and doesn’t give a fvck ultimately, he’d also never release anything if he didnt really have to, he does this for himself, for me the best art is entirely selfish and should consider no one. People are always disappointed, a lot of people just can’t live with the fact that an artist strays from their own personal conception of what an artist should be, it’s some sort of misguided entitlement, I lost that when II was around 14, a lot of people don’t lose it and now these people have the internet. No artist owes me anything, if they gave me one thing in my life then i will always respect their art, regardless of whether it works for me or not, and if I don’t like it much, I won’t be peddling that opinion on the internet in an entitled egotistical manner, I’m glad I did not know that a lot of people were disappointed, haha.

Thank you very much! Best JKB, Jan 2021

[veldian]

tell us more of ur think tank hcs i personally am at the edge of my seat

HELL YEAH ALRIGHT HERE WE GO. some of these might be against canon in some way but that's your fault for trusting me with this

ALSO, AS USUAL, I HAVE TO APOLOGIZE. THIS GOT VERY LONG. when i think about the tanks i go fuckin wild with it

starting with pride headcanons to get the ball rolling

all the tanks are nonbinary, but additionally, dala is a trans woman and 0 is a trans man

8 hates gender he fucking hates it. every day he wakes up and says "today i will make gender my bitch" and then he does. he says this in the game too you just don't know cuz he only speaks in static (don't factcheck this)

if you ask 8 what pronouns she uses, they will shrug and give you a "i dunno" noise. sometimes it'll make a non-committal hand movement and some unintelligible noises. good luck

god this bitch (borous) is gay! good for him! good for him.

he's also intersex! i don't remember where we got that hc but i like it and im holding onto it

okay but borous calls himself bi because yeah Men, but he also loves dala very much and doesn't want to misgender her. also as previously stated, 8's main goal is to confuse everyone about their gender so the tanks all stick with mspec labels to be on the safe side. you never know what'll happen. gender is a ticking time bomb

bi gang: klein, borous, 0

pan gang: dala, mobius

don't ask her about any of her identities she doesn't know the answer either: 8

have i gone off about polytank dynamics enough? i don't think so

8 and dala started dating first because horny bitches gravitate towards each other. they can also "pass" as a "straight couple" so hopefully no one at work will look at them and call them slurs. hopefully

klein and borous knocked things out of the park for being the first gay scientists ever

8 and dala became polyam icons and pulled 0 in. trans bitches gravitate towards each other

klein and borous did the same with mobius. bitches with facial hair gravitate towards each other

???????

idk and then all six of them started dating somehow. the end

somewhere along the way klein and 8 were like "i like you a little too much" and now they're inseparable

okay anyway. misc hcs

ive mentioned this before but when i pretend everything is in modern times, 0 is a tiktokker and he thrives on the attention and making fun of his coworkers on the internet

"watching steven universe repeatedly when i felt even slightly bad transed my gender" - doctor 8 old world blues

i just remembered i made a carrd for the tanks as if they were kinnies in their early to mid 20s

8 kinned pearl su. borous kinned werewolf cookie. 0 kinned rimmer red dwarf. mobius kinned... morbius forbidden planet. obviously. klein refused to put his kins on it. DID DALA KIN FROM DANGANRONPA

i think at one point we had a half-joking hc where klein gets nauseous if he sees blood

and then that changed to he can't see others blood, only his own

while borous can't see his own blood, but he's fine seeing other ppl's

i know borous said that gabe barked at everyone, but i think gabe trusts the other tanks because he knows borous does

borous set up a kissing booth with gabe. the crowd goes wild

when the tanks get together they usually go to klein's. he's the leader or something. also he has a fucking bar in his house.

he complains about them the whole time but you can really tell he loves having people over. why else would he deck his house out like that? he LOVES hosting stuff. house husband

if you saw my chart where i said klein would rather die than do dishes, i was so wrong. his house is pristine. its easily the cleanest

klein's love language is acts of service. he goes over to his partners' houses when they feel awful and clean stuff up for them when they can't. he also makes them food if they want it. he only complains a little, but you can tell he's mostly teasing

did you know klein has five mugs in his kitchen in-game. he's literally prepared to host his partners at any given moment.

the group have learned that letting 8 come over when their house is a mess is a Huge mistake. it goes from 8 trying to help "tidy up" to "im going to put your books and albums in alphabetical order by artist also your clothes are going to be hue-sorted"

"8 why are there only 8 books on each of my bookshelves"

"it looks better"

"it literally does not"

8 can no longer stomach going into 0's house

on the other hand, 0 hates staying in 8's house. the ticking of all their clocks is sensory hell

on 80 date nights they have to do rock-paper-scissors for which house they go to. or they go out. they love each other but their houses drive the other fucking nuts

oh speaking of their houses. yes dala said she didn't like Literal Teddy Bears but that is null and void considering she has teddies in her house

and she has 5 on her bed. five of them :)

she named all of them after her partners! its mostly cute but there is a slight bit of concern because they know what she does with them <__<

not that 8 has any place to judge. mobius found batteries under its pillow once. all 8 said was "they can vibrate." mobius regrets touching them.

i don't know what to say about dala's mannequins i don't have anything funny im just scared

WHY ARE 0 AND KLEIN THE ONLY ONES WITH BATHROOMS IT DRIVES ME INSANE 0'S BATHTUB ISNT EVEN LAYING DOWN ITS AGAINST THE WALL WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT GENERATOR IN HIS BATHROOM DO THE OTHER TANKS JUST SHIT OUTSIDE I'M SEEING RED

mobius and 0 are both into robotics, and they worked together to make muggy, so they've had date nights where they mainly tinker with electronic things.

0 gets very excited when he makes a breakthrough, and seeing that warms mobius's heart. mobius made a habit of kissing 0 on the forehead or squeezing 0 into a hug when they figure things out.

(0 remembers he likes men.) 😳

dala/klein date nights are essentially just them drinking and gossiping chatting

i asked polycule for some more, so here are ones from your local think tank kinnies

borous -

"klein and borous both like classical music in very different ways. klein mostly likes it to feel smart (see: wheatley) but he just started associating it with the others so it felt nicer And borous just likes it bc hes borous"

klein also likes jazz, but so do all the rest of them

8 has a cochlear implant

"dala likes dressing up to look pretty (see: runway) but is personally embarrassed by it (until she gets encouragement) bc she feels like the others dont support that"

"0 loves collecting and reading those stupid magazines with the birthday party products and themes that ud wanna buy from as a kid but are way too expensive"

"mobius has a secret love for puppetry and will try to bring it up sometimes whenever he can. hes made 3 separate sets of the other tanks as puppets and they freak 0 out"

"borous, in an attempt to better his faults, has started learning from dala and 8 on how to take care of plants instead of what he did before. his basement turns into a cool little green house cozy cuddle area"

"to add on: 8 gardens to cope whenever hes alone bc (projects onto ur kin) he mood drops very fast when alone"

"mobius likes dressing in cozy sweaters and fancy stuff"

0 -

"0 doesn't like anal that much" (thanks.)

dala -

"their new rap album called boyz in the tanks" (THANKS.)

and to top things off, :) here are the normal names for them all, created primarily by our borous kinnie

klein - Ernest Klein (nicknamed ernie)

mobius - Wilbert Mobius (nicknamed bert)

borous - James H. Borous (nicknamed jamie)

dala - Dala Theodore (HER NICKNAME IS TEDDY ITS GENIUS)

8 - Emmett Handley (nicknamed 8 + emmy)

0 - Robert O'Barrick (nicknamed 0/O + robbie (HIM SHARING HOUSE'S NAME IS INTENTIONAL. HE'S TRANS HE PICKED HIS NAME WHY DID HE DO THIS))

[kingofthewilderwest]

"#just because you have a bias about certain socioeconomic groups which tend to listen to country doesn't mean" // Yup. I tend to side-eye folks who are like "I like all kinds of music except country and [Insert a genre of music usually associated with Black creators like rap and hip hop]" You're not slick, ppl. I know what you're saying.

^^^^^^^^^ You hit the nail on the head.

It’s racial bias. It’s socioeconomic bias. It’s bias against people groups who have less respect and say in society.

From my tags on this post:

#don’t get me started on a long rant of the progressive side of country music and what’s been progressive FOR DECADES#from times near its BEGINNInGS#through the modern age#just because you have a bias about certain socioeconomic groups which tend to listen to country doesn’t mean#that that’s actually what the genre is or who the artists are#I could go for a LONNNNG time about this#a LONG time#some of the best protest songs I know of today’s current political situation#are country#or have like ya’ll forgotten about the folk revival#of the 1960s#or…#gahghfnfddhgnghfngh#I AM GAY AND I LISTEN TO COUNTRY#NYEH!!!!

Now. I understand disinterest in a genre because it’s not your aesthetic, but when people express their feelings for country, R&B, hip-hop, etc. …the dialogue isn’t casual “It’s not my thing.” The dialogue is a hateful, passionate retaliation.

Other genres aren’t treated like this. It’s normalized and encouraged to hate on country and rap. These genres are systematically treated with less respect and that disrespect culturally arose because these genres are associated with less-respected demographics. 

(Country music is associated with people of low socioeconomic status, for people who aren’t explicitly aware.)

Anecdotally: I’ve caught something interesting about anti-country music sentiment. Many people tell me they can’t stand the “twang.” Half the time, I’ve noticed that their internalized definition of “twang” isn’t the vocal technique; it’s that they can’t stand the presence of a Southern accent. And hooboy does that have TONS of sociocultural bias issues. As a linguist, I’ve read endless sociolinguistic studies about how Southern dialects are treated as “lesser,” and how speakers of the dialect are automatically judged to be less intelligent, etc. It’s not good, folks.

Sometimes, to help friends get out of their anti-country mindset, I’ve “tricked” them into liking country. See, genres like bluegrass grew closely out of Scots-Irish folk music. Often, we’re playing the same tunes on both sides of the Atlantic. So I play a few instrumentals, my friend goes, “Oh! I love Celtic music

The biases against those demographics color how people view the music. There’s endless things that can be said about hip-hop bias, holy shit. I won’t focus on that today because I don’t believe I am qualified to be a spokesman. Someone who understands that genre better, and other genres associated with the African-American community, and is African-American, would be a better human to listen to than me. I defer to their knowledge and experience. It’s hella important to understand what bias has been reflected against those genres.

But there’s just as much bias against country music, against another demographic. And I’ve found it wild how it gets treated on places like tumblr, which wants to stand up for underprivileged groups, but somewhat inaccurately associates country music as “anti-gay conservative evil white person music” rather than music of people historically of lower socioeconomic status.

Yes, some of the demographic that listens to country music or plays country music are bad apples. But like… thinking the music is JUST THAT is a huge disservice to what country actually is and who the music artists actually are.

The history of country music is one giant collaborative melting pot of people from many different cultural backgrounds. Broad West African influence. Mexican influence. Italian influence. German influence. Scots-Irish influence. Cherokee influence. More. Early record labels like OKEH foolishly separated “hillbilly music” (presumably white folk music) from “rhythm and blues” (presumably Black folk music) without understanding the constant racial, demographic, regional, and cultural cross-pollination that occurred between the musicians from country music’s origins. And while there ARE certain issues in country music’s past and present, and we can’t let those issues go forgotten, that’s far from the whole story. We shouldn’t romanticize issues, but we should acknowledge that this music genre has given us major strides too.

Country music is the banjo, brought from Africa, combined with the mandolin, brought from Italy, combined with the fiddle, brought from Ireland, combined with the guitar and the dobro and the accordion and the upright bass and the electric guitar and the electric bass and whatever instruments you want to put in there.

Country music is African-American musicians like DeFord Bailey, the first radio star ever introduced on the Grand Ole Opry (THE most revered country music hub out there), blues harmonica performer, playing to crowds decades before segregation was de-legalized. He toured with white Opry musicians who treated him as one of their own. It’s soul music genre pioneer Ray Charles producing a studio album entirely dedicated to country music hits like “Hey Good Lookin’” from Hank Williams. It’s country star Charley Pride, who despite the racism against him in the 1960s rose to fame and made audiences fall in love with his beautiful voice. It’s the African-American musicians who inspired many commercial country stars, like Arnold Shultz influencing Bill Monroe and the railroad workers inspiring Jimmie Rodgers.

Country music is stars like Johnny Rodriguez and Rick Treviño, singing country music in Spanish, and using obvious Latin flavors in the genre.

Country music is filled with badass women like the ladies who STARTED THE GENRE ROLLING IN THE FIRST PLACE, Sara Carter and Mother Maybelle Carter (whose guitar style is hugely influential to this day) and Maybelle’s daughters Helen, June, and Anita; the first female music manager in the music industry, Louise Scruggs; songwriters like Felice Bryant and Loretta Lynn; the most awarded female artist in Grammy history Alison Krauss; and powerhouses like Dolly Parton who stepped out of an over-controlling entertainer’s shadow to become a badass in all things like supporting the LGBTQ community, contributing to pro-transgender films ahead of their time, and starring in sex worker positive productions like “The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.”

Country music is filled with activism. Johnny Cash showed a heart for those forgotten by society. He toured many times in prisons. Cash especially was an activist for Native American rights. He toured with Native American songwriters so audiences could hear their own words (I’ve been trying to find names but I’m having difficulties re-finding that information, so my apologies for not giving names of those who deserve to be mentioned). Cash released albums dedicated to exposing past and present injustices against the Native American people. He went on tours specifically to Native American reservations. 

And it’s not just Johnny Cash!

Country music is many stars from the Grand Ole Opry banding together to release AIDS benefit albums - big names like Alison Krauss, Willie Nelson, Marty Stuart, aurgh I’m too lazy to write them all, PEOPLE.

Country music is Earl Scruggs and his sons playing at the Vietnam War Protests.

Country music is tied in with the fucking folk revival of the 1960s, which was deep in left-wing activism and the Civil Rights Movement. Folk singers sang traditional Appalachian and English ballads alongside their own compositions, topical pieces protesting the current political situation. You can call one artist “folk” or “Americana” and another one “country,” but the influences were intermingling, and it’s why we have Bob Dylan and Woody Guthrie and Joan Baez and John Denver and Pete Seeger owning a banjo that says, “This machine surrounds hate and forces it to surrender.”

Dammit, I have a full BOOK that discusses country music and political ties. 

There’s another book out there, which I haven’t read, that discusses the relationship between country music and the queer community, and how bias against country music is NOT as reflective of the listening demographic as we stereotype. I’ll take the word of one reviewer who said:

[Nadine Hubbs] explores country music lyrics, presenting a great deal of evidence suggesting that working class America is not inherently homophobic, but that as middle class cultural taste has changed to include formal acceptance of homosexuality, this process has included pinning homophobic ideas on the working class.

Country music is lyrics like this 1975 controversial song “The Pill”:

You wined me and dined meWhen I was your girlPromised if I’d be your wifeYou’d show me the worldBut all I’ve seen of this old worldIs a bed and a doctor billI’m tearing down your brooder house‘Cause now I’ve got the pillAll these years I’ve stayed at homeWhile you had all your funAnd every year that’s gone byAnother baby’s comeThere’s a-gonna be some changes madeRight here on nursery hillYou’ve set this chicken your last time‘Cause now I’ve got the pill

Country music is lyrics like this 2013 song that feels as relevant than ever:

If crooks are in charge, should we let them pick our pockets?If we don’t want trouble, should we not try to stop it?We could just sink into the quicksand slavery we’re born inBut fighting endless wars for greedy liars is getting pretty boringThey think they got us trained, so we’ll think we’re living freeIf we got time and money for junk food and TVBut it’s plain honest people never stand a chance of winning electionsThey just let us pick which liars take our rights away for our own protectionThe corporate propaganda paralyzes us with fearDestroying our ability to trustFear keeps us fighting with each other over scrapsStarving to death in the dustOrganized religion really helps you submitBut the meek are inheriting the short end of the stickFear surrounds compassion like a layer of moldAnd weakens our defenses so we’re too weak to be boldLife could be heaven, but this corrupted systemTakes away our rights, expects us not to miss themThe middle class is shrinking while the lower class growsIf we don’t wake up soon, we’ll have no class left to lose

Country music is Christians themselves criticizing the hypocritical Evangelical culture in the USA for the bullshit hatefulness stewing inside it:

Every house has got a Bible and a loaded gunWe got preachers and politicians‘Round here it’s kinda hard to tell which oneIs gonna do more talkin’ with a crooked tongue

And as that one post I just reblogged shows, there’s MANY queer country musicians out there producing explicitly pro-LGBTQ+ music.

I’m brushing over so much. I’m sorry for the simplification that goes with me doing such a pass-by overview. I’m sorry I’m focusing more on history than the present (I know more about the 1920s-1960s eras, so I’m talking from my strong suit). I hope the information is at least strong enough to get my point across.

There are definitely listeners and artists in country music who are uber-conservative white hateful Christians. Yes. I know why country music gets associated with that. But.

Country music is not ABOUT this uber-conservative white hateful Christian side. The genre is not “polluted”. It is a thousand voices from a thousand perspectives of people from many backgrounds and beliefs. And many of those thousand voices are old traditional songs that came from Black communities, or were composed by Mexican-Americans, or were performed by folk artists as part of a protest for equal rights. 

(Note: I’m *NOT* saying all Christians are bad or that different political angles don’t have merits. I’m Christian myself! And you don’t know my political party. I’m just trying to get the point across that country music isn’t ENTRENCHED in one questionable demographic.)

You don’t have to like country music. It doesn’t have to be your aesthetic. But if you find it fun to get in on society’s popular country hate roasting… please rethink this. The reason country music has been hated from its roots is because it’s associated with the socioeconomically disadvantaged.

I’m with you 100%, Ashley. When someone says they like all genres “except country music and rap,” I get a little leery. I used to be one of those people when I was younger. I had to learn to grow past those biases. But once I did, I realized there was so much I was hating on that I didn’t understand. Now, I hope I can help people overcome their own biases, such as ones they don’t realize they’ve had - for things like music.

Hi ya’lls. I’m queer and I love country.

P.S. If anyone has anything to add or correct, please feel free to add on! I’m doing my best but I do not know everything and would be happy to learn more, too!

[the32ndbeat]

about me tag;

tagged by: @passionfruithyuck ( thank you so much for the tag love ❤️ this was super fun to do ^^ )

1. It’s your birthday! What did you ask for and did you receive it?

I don’t really have a lot of things I want or need tbh... I didn’t get any physical gifts for my birthday but I did get to go eat at a restaurant I liked so that was cool.

2. What was the last song or album you listened to?

Hmm, the last song I listened to was Kick It by NCT 127!

3. What is your go to snack when you’re hungry or bored?

I don’t snack a lot but when I do, I like to get bread >< and just slather it with peanut butter, kaya or jam! toasting it sometimes makes it SO MUCH better

4. What is your morning routine?

Ok right now, i’m living like a bum since uni doesn't start until early august so i wake up at 8am ( my phone is my alarm ) but i rarely REALLY wake up at 8am so i either go back to sleep until 10am latest or lounge in bed with my phone for a bit ( and by a bit i mean an hour or so ). I go to brush my teeth and wash my face then i’ll go get breakfast! I must drink a glass of water every morning before i eat, it’s a routine by now. I usually don’t eat breakfast if i wake up too late ( like maybe 9:45am ) or i’d just eat one slice of bread as compared to two. I like to walk around and just keep standing for about an hour to aid digestion ( i’m weird i know ) and then i’ll settle down in the living room with my laptop and do whatever I want for the day! 

5. What mythical/cryptid creature would you be?

A dragon for sure.

6. How do you interact with someone that you don’t like?

i usually ignore them, just simply don’t talk to them. I rarely find ppl i don’t like though and i usually try my best to like people or give them a chance so if i don’t like you then... I guess i REALLY don’t like you. 

7. How do you define a toxic person?

hmm to me, it’s someone who’s just fake. someone who acts all nice and friendly in front of you but actually hates or someone who only talks to you when you’ve got something they want and will ignore you in a heartbeat once they’ve taken advantage of you.

8. Have you ever been to a concert or fanmeet type of event? If not, would you want to?

I have! But it’s not a kpop concert, it’s a taiwanese singer’s concert. Show Luo, has anyone heard of him? I’d love love love to go to a tbz or nct concert and fanmeet!! it’d mean the world to me to be able to see them in real life.

9. Do you believe in astrology? Why or why not?

Yes, to a certain extent. I believe in the personality description part but not when it comes to predicting events because i think ultimately what happens is caused by your own actions rather than astrological events.

10. If you had only one sense (hearing, touch, sight, etc.), which would you want?

Sight. For sure sight. I want to be able to see. I’m a very avid reader ( although i could learn braille but idk ) and i’m a visual learner so yes, sight.

11. Who is your favourite celebrity or idol?

um i’d have to say the boyz’s juyeon... he’s so incredibly talented and his blankness and clueless/innocent personality just makes me love him more if that’s still possible ><

12. If you could talk to your favourite celebrity(s) for a limited time, what would you tell them?

I probably wouldn’t even be able to get a single word out because of how nervous i am but i’d tell juyeon to keep working hard, never give up and that deobis will always have tbz’s back. we can see that they’re working very hard and we are extremely proud and grateful for them for that. i would also say that he’s super inspiring to me and i greatly admire his dancing, being a dancer myself. he’s not just an idol i may have a gigantic crush on but also a role model to me ^^

13. I’m taking you out on a date and it’s your choice. Where are we going and what are we going to do?

i’m a boring person so we’d go watch movies because i love movies and then we’d go get food and maybe bubble tea after, just walking around the city and talking ^^ either that or we’ll go to an amusement park!

14. Do you like sweet or savory foods?

normally savoury but these days i’ve been feeling sweet more often, not sure why

15. Do you have any band merchandise or merchandise from any of your favorite artists? If so, what?

I actually don’t lmao... I really want to buy a tbz album eventually though!

tagging: @ihearttbz @minfuwa @fluffytbz @renjunwrites @hyuckgasm @in-my-neofeelings @badwithten @jopping-to-my-kpop @moondustaeil @neo-cult-ure @127vevo @nzeeten @mae-gi-writes @tbzhours @atbzkingdom @chaoticdeobi @jenocakes  @sankyeom @byunbaekby + anyone who wants to do this ^^ just say i tagged you! 

( i just realised i tagged so many ppl omo but i rly wanna know how y'all will answer this questions! don’t feel pressured to do it though ^^ )

[wydmariana]

        hi my loves   !   ur  fav  big  mess  dani   here   ,  i  also  play  our  hailey  fc  alanna  heh   !   i’m  bringing  back  my  bbyg  mariana   !  she’s  my  original  wealthy  character  &  i’ve  had  her  for  like over  3   years   ,  i’m  super  excited  2  be  playing  her  again  &  i  hope  u  guys  rly  like  her   !!!  i’m  gonna  put  all  the   tea  on  her  under  the  cut  &  if  u  wanna  plot  like   this  &   i’ll  come  bug  u  , i  rly  always  need  connections  n  love  plotting  ♡  u  can  also  hmu  on  discord  !! @ 𝒎𝒈𝒌'𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒆 .#1958

new york’s very own mariana cavello was spotted on broadway street in christian louboutins . your resemblance to selena gomez is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty fourth birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being stubborn , but also adroit . i guess being a gemini explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be  lyrics  scribbled  in  a  notebook  ,  gold  jewelry  ,  &  blue  nail  polish  . ( i  defeaned  a  girl  in  a  fight  when  i  was  17 )  &  ( cisfemale & she/her  )  +  ( dani , 20 , she/her , est . )

╰ ˚･ﾟ  ♡   𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒔   :

full name: mariana marisol cavello

nickname(s): mari,

age: twenty four

date of birth: june 4th

hometown: new york city

current location: upper east side, new york city

ethnicity: half mexican

nationality: american

gender: cisfemale

pronouns: she/her

parents names: alexander hastings, liliana cavello

orientation: pansexual but she doesn’t like labels

religion: grew up catholic, undecided

political affiliation: democrat

occupation: singer/songwriter

living arrangements: lives in her own mansion in the upper east side

language(s) spoken: english, spanish

accent: american

face claim: selena gomez

hair colour: x (most basic/accurate/but it changes)

eye colour: brown

height: 5″5

weight: 113lbs

build: petite

tattoos: mostly selena’s canon, but x instead of the music note

piercings: x (both ears)

drugs/alcohol/sex: yes/yes/yes

pets: one cat, 5 years old, named sergio - x

astrological chart  : gemini sun  ,  libra moon  ,  scorpio rising

character  inspo  :  meredith  grey  (  grey’s  anatomy  )  ,  simone  davis  (  star  )  ,  alyssa  (  the  end  of  the  fucking  world  )  ,  carla  (  elite  )  ,   kat  stratford  (  10  things  i  hate  about  you  )  ,  serena  vanderwoodsen  (  gossip  girl  )  ,  jessica  davis  (  13 reasons  why  )

pinterest  board  :  here .

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡  𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚  &  𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕   (   tw  :  abuse ,   violence  , injury ,   sexual  assault .  )  :

ok i changed her around quite a lil bit so i’m excited to rEdevelop !  :~)

mariana was born into a seemingly perfect family ,  her older brother &  her having been born heirs to alexander hastings , billionaire hotel & business entrepreneur , shark-tank cast member  ( think kevin o’leary vibes .. yeah . ) &  liliana cavello , legendary supermodel  ( think cindy crawford )

she was spoiled bc they were rich af , so like she never NEEDED for anything , except LoVe :)

mari was quick to blow her dad’s money but did he notice ? no

she still is kjdfnsjdf

mariana was a happy child, but growing up in a household with her father quickly became toxic

she started noticing it when she was around 10

his yelling , his anger against her mother , the hostility towards the entire household

the relationship between her parents always had been toxic but now that they had kids it was quick to spread through the whole household

as mariana grew older and started high school , there were times where she would sit in one of the offices of her father’s buildings and do homework while she waited for him to finish so they could go home

at the mere age of fifteen was the first time one of her father’s co-workers sexually assaulted her in an empty conference room after everyone else went home & she’d be waiting for her dad

this continued for a little under  2  years .

this is when her behaviour at school started to get out of hand, she’d start skipping class, get caught smoking pot, talking back to teachers, etc

it went on for months & mariana suspected that her father knew and wasn’t doing anything to stop it

when she turned 16  &  got  a  boyfriend  , it started affecting her even more . she was struggling w being intimate bc of these things that  were happening to her

which is when she eventually  confronted him about it , in tears , in the kitchen with her mother

it resulted in a screaming match

mariana’s behaviour completely went off the rails after that day & she went to school one day & got into a fight with this girl who was taunting her

they fought and mariana’s anger got the best of her &  she ended up beating the girl so bad that she became deaf in one ear

shoutout to degrassi for the idea Ok female sean cameron in the house

( i needed a secret for mari n i was watching this so i was like .. ok why not lol )

she turned 17 shortly after this argument and by some miracle ( aka money ) her dad was able to keep her out of juvie despite the charges that were brought against her

this is mariana’s secret!!!!!

anyway now , she doesn’t talk to her father really , at all . unless her mom ambushes them into the same room which sometimes happens jkfnsf

mariana moved out on her 18th birthday ,  still has a good relationship with her  mom and brother  &   extended family

when mariana turned 18 was also when she started her career !! she started out as an actor in a few different movies

she got her big break when she starred in a ‘riverdale or like , grey’s anatomy’ type of show a few years ago prob when she was about 19

and that went on for 2 or 3 seasons before she stopped it to pursue music bc !

writing and singing and performing have always been Mariana’s passions & emotional outlet

anyway , she dropped a single while on the show & it did well so she proceeded to drop an album which also blew up

she is now rly successful w her music career and loves it sm , like it’s literally her dream come true ok

it’s the one thing that makes her happy

so yah , if ppl knew she deafened a girl totally wouldn’t b all sunshine n rainbows :/ hehe .

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡  𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚  (   tw  :  drugs  )  :

mariana is very lowkey crazy

like she knows how to hide it but girl , it’ll come out

she can definitely be a brat , she wasn’t raised with proper consequences & often thinks she can do whatever she wants , has a bit of an attitude about it

she hates being told what to do

and will voice her opinion

she is also the most loyal & loving person you know , but the thing is it’s very hidden deep down rn . she is completely walls up , doesn’t wanna let anyone get close to her bc she’s a PUSSY

and like , she hasn’t worked through her trauma & probably never will

the only opening up she does is when she’s writing music

daddy issues galore over here

but she’s a lowkey softie when she  waants 2 be

when she loves someone she loves fiercly !!

mariana . is a  . party . animal

it’s basically all she does

like every night , her stamina is insane bc she can go out every single night until 3 am if she really wants to .

and she’s fun too , if she’s going out she’s getting WASTED

she’s the type of drunk girl to make out w  all her friends

she loves cocaine, is most definitely an addict (   but who isn’t in this city  ), tequila is her alcohol of choice, but she’ll drink anything you give her & weed is her creative saving grace

we luv a bitch who doesn’t care abt her health !

u will most likely find her in sweatpants and a hoodie or a big tshirt

she will dress up to go out & luvs lookin cute for paparazzi & career stuff

um , she listens to a lot of rap and just lays in bed  w her cat smoking blunts

um n ya  .. sad bitch vibes :/

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡  𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔  :

i have  a wanted connections page here    &   a   wanted  tag  here  !!! i need & want every connection so pls hmu ! like this  &  i’ll come to you .

[loplainlointhemorning]

Omg your tags... Can you talk more about your songwriting pls? I'm at that point now where I'm just trying to finish as many songs as I can, not caring so much abt the quality bc otherwise I will never finish one. I still only have a few, I'm trying to learn the process and what works for me. But it's so encouraging to hear someone else talk abt this like I keep comparing myself to famous ppl I listen to and it feels like they just have a gift and I don't

dude, I have been comparing myself to artists I look up to constantly, ever since I got into music at fourteen, wondering why I’m not good enough. I think it’s normal. The truth is, when you stop listening so much to beginner’s self doubt, perfectionism, and in my case, chronic anxiety, everybody is the same. The people who are really good are really good because they sat down and fucked around with instruments long enough to understand them, the people who are really good are really good because they love what they do, and all of them wrote shitty songs in their late teens/early 20s/whenever they started out. I have(and still do) beat myself up for everything from writing too fast to writing too slow, for taking months long breaks because of mental health issues, for lyrics that my band laughed at, for only knowing how to play one instrument, the list goes on...But I comfort myself with facts like these:

PJ Harvey was asked about her first ever song in an interview from 1995 and that’s the closest I’ve seen her come to blushing; She said it was about a girl going on an adventure and that it was awful. She reiterated in a magazine that most of her earliest work was ‘terrible’ and heavily influenced by Irish folk music, meaning, apparently, that it was full of tin whistles. It took her years before she was comfortable playing her orginal music in front of other people(and if you watch her early Dry performances, she’s not even all that comfortable in the first place.) The important thing is, PJ Harvey hated her early songs.

Nick Cave said that he was ashamed of the Birthday Party’s discography up until Junkyard and that he didn’t like to think about those albums. Nick Cave hated his early songs- And Nick Cave is partially famous DUE to these early songs, go figure.

Courtney Love bashes Hole’s first album Pretty On The Inside nearly constantly, calling it ‘unlistenable’ and saying it was more about her persona being established than making good music. Courtney Love hated her early songs- and, once again, her band was given its name and image because of them.

I BEG you to listen to five seconds of David Bowie’s first album, which he doesn’t discuss.

If these people, who mean the world to me and have saved hoards of others from personal destruction, had given up bc they were Bad at a young and inexperienced age we wouldn’t have their music and it’s not an exaggeration to say that that would have ended in suicide for a big number of people. If you can get your ego in place, you can believe the same about your music, and the thing that’s going to keep you motivated more than anything else is Ego.

We live in a world right now where popular music lacks human hands and clumsiness and rawness and so the fact that both of us are, against the odds, composing music that still reflects those things is a rebellion. It’s important that we keep writing, not just because we deserve to be good songwriters because we care about it, but because for music to evolve there needs to be a constant underground of young people with limited skills trying their best. Plus, if we’re both lucky, we’ll end up saving people the same way we were saved and if it takes a few notebooks of three note trauma songs to get there then fine(besides, who doesn’t love a good three-note trauma song?).

But beyond the ‘glory’ of it(and I think to do anything artistic you have to romanticize it to a certain degree), I started songwriting seriously at the end of a bad relationship when I was sixteen, nearly seventeen. When that relationship ended, I wrote constantly. I wrote about everything. My main influences were Bikini Kill and The Runaways and I hadn’t developed my seriousness towards lyrics yet so anything went. I’d write three songs in a week, realize that two were bad and play the third one for my band only to get laughed at for writing something like “I swallow Clorox” which was a confessional thing about suicidal thoughts that hurt my feelings, but wasn’t articulated well.

I wrote Nirvana knock-off songs and I wrote Hole knock-off songs and I half finished at least one hundred different things and I have three notebooks filled with them, the latter half being the worst fake-Nick Cave writing I have ever read. From all of 2018, during which I probably wrote 30-35 songs, I have two that I would actually put on an album and three that I can remember/still like. Once I got my mental health under control, I did the same thing for the bulk of 2019. This stage you’re at is NOTHING TO FEEL BAD ABOUT. It’s like making stuff out of Play-Doh or fingerpainting. It’s FUN and you’re learning, Extremely Quickly, a million different skills that you’re going to need over the course of your life. Lyric writing, the classic verse/chorus/verse, how to invert that, experimental tactics, particular playing styles that you like, playing styles that you HATE, etc.

And the best part about it is that some of your songs are good! Some of them have good parts that you’ll take out later to put into better songs! You’re probably sitting on two or three good songs at the moment, maybe even more, maybe you’ve got a whole album of brilliant material and you just don’t know it. In thirty years your demos could work like Vashti Bunyan’s and be the proto-whatever of a new genre. I really don’t want to make you think that all your material right now is bad, because that idea has actually been super detrimental to me and is a shitty narrative pushed to push beginners. I’m saying that it’s OKAY for you to be bad, that even experienced people write bad shit, but that if you think you’ve written some bangers they deserve to be recognized as such.

To close, new phase that I was talking about, the quality over quantity phase, is definitely something I had to work up to. 90% of it is taking in enough new music to understand what you really want from yourself, and the rest of it is gaining enough confidence to willingly let other people hear what you do. I only started taking my shit this seriously in late December of last year because I knew people would be hearing it, and that has its set backs too: My perfectionism is crazy right now and I have to kick back against it all the time. The perks of getting to the point where you can hone yourself are that you build real relationships with your songs, and that you have some idea of what you want. But I also think that it’s healthy to go through the quantity over quality phase over and over again throughout the course of your career, because there’s no way to really write in a new style unless you keep going back to frenzied experimentation. If we both end up pursuing this long term, we’ll probably have to work on Finishing over Perfecting a million times over, and its best to make peace with it now.

I am so sorry that this is like. A million paragraphs but another important aspect of songwriting is procrastinating by being on tumblr so!!! You’re doing just fine. Keep up the good work, and feel free to talk to me or share music with me anytime. I hope this helps, or at least isn’t a boring read.

[chvrrybaby]

*itzy  vc*  hey  hey  hey   !   (  i  see  that  i’m  icy  )   what’s  up,  i’m  diana,  i’m  nineteen,  and  i’m  ur  resident  girl  group  stan.  i  reside  in  the  est  timezone  &  go  by  the  pronouns  she/her.  now,  finally  introducing  ...  loona    !!   jk,  her  name  is  blair  &  u  can  learn  abt  her  under  the  cut   !   my  discord  is  lana del rey is coming <3#5522   (  stream  her  new  album  august  30th  ),  so  feel  free  to  message  me  there  or  through  tumblr  im’s  if  u  prefer  that   !   otherwise,  i’ll  come  to  u <3

—  kim doyeon. she/her. cis female. | was that blair ryu i just saw in the hideaway lobby ? i hear the nineteen year old spends most of their time working as a sugar baby/studying classic literature and women’s studies, but i’ve always just seen them writing in her dream journal. they live in 5A and i often see them in the halls. they always give me a vibe of loosely curled hair, cherry lip gloss, the lingering scent of vanilla in the air.

(    𝑩𝑨𝑪𝑲𝑮𝑹𝑶𝑼𝑵𝑫.   )

born on october 5th, 1999  ( this is literally a day before my bday ooc but anyway ajkdhsjdh )  in rochester, new york, blair’s first impression of the world was a crisp autumn day

she was her parents first and only child. her mother was an elementary school teacher, while her father worked at a nearby power plant in ontario

the family never made too much money, but they were able to get by, at least at first

she had a fairly happy childhood, though it was a lonely one. her father was always working odd hours, and with her mother gone during the day, she spent most of her time with a babysitter and the family golden retriever

eventually, she herself started going to school. she immediately excelled in the english department and fell in love with reading. blair realized early on how much she enjoyed escaping reality with a novel, immersing herself in a story so exciting compared to her dull life

almost everything was fine until her high school years. aside from the fact that she never had a present father figure, she was closer to her mom and still loved by both of her parents. however, when her high school years came around, her father lost his job

her father was the families main provider, and her mothers salary alone would not be enough to take care of the entire family. while he searched for another job, they had to give away the family golden retriever to one of blair’s aunts because they couldn’t afford the extra cost :(

on top of losing her beloved pet, the loss of her father’s job prompting the family to pick up and move their entire life

already in the midst of high school, blair had to leave her life as she knew it behind. the family moved to statesboro, georgia, and her father found a job at the nearby power plant

the transition to life in georgia was not easy for blair. though she didn’t exactly have trouble making friends, she didn’t feel like she could truly connect with anyone

once again, blair turned to losing herself in a book to pass the time

shortly after the move to georgia, her parents experienced some difficulties within their marriage. they ended up separating, and blair spent the remainder of her high school years living with each of them for half of the time

she did not mind her parents separating, as she knew it was for the best. however, her father found a girlfriend fairly quickly, and blair would eventually find out her father had been having an affair

her father spent most of his free time with his new girlfriend and her family. blair was upset at how he prioritized his the new people in his life over her when he was barely ever around for her growing up

meanwhile, her mother was having trouble adjusting to being alone, so she moved back to new york to live with her sister

blair stayed behind in georgia to finish high school, but knew she wanted to go elsewhere for college. she wanted to get as far away from her father and his new life as possible

once blair turned eighteen, she began to sell pictures for money. she wanted to earn as much as possible so she could afford to go away for university. she created an alias and began to sell pictures and videos of her feet. eventually, she expanded her horizons once she realized how much money she could earn

she never went as far as sleeping with her clients, but she would go on dates with them and spend the days with them to earn more money ( kind of like ludovica/chiara in the italian show baby on netflix minus sleeping w them )

she dated a few people throughout her high school years, and began to more “seriously” date a guy during her senior year in high school, though she knew the relationship wouldn’t last. despite appearing as a more serious relationship, to her, it wasn’t really anything of the sort, and she mostly wanted a relationship for senior prom and other trivialities

after senior year ended and she had accepted admission into uni in seattle, she basically cut ties with everyone in georgia aksdjskdjh she said good bye forever ! rip poor unnamed boyfriend he didn’t see it coming ...

her father also did not see it coming because she didn’t even tell him where she applied. but at the same time, did he ask ? no :/

once she left for uni, her relationship with her father became very very estranged. she still speaks to her mom on a pretty regular basis, but even then, she has a whole secret life and doesn’t feel particular close to either of them sjkdfhskdjh

and that’s that for background !

(   𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑶𝑵𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑻𝒀.   )

blair is a libra sun leo moon ( rising sign & other placements tbd )

she is definitely a friendly/sociable person. she can be pretty outgoing and loves to be around people. idk her mbti yet but she is def an extrovert ! ( she does tend to keep her feelings to herself tho )

despite her friendly demeanor, she does have a fiery spirit. if u wrong her she will hold a grudge against u until it gets settled/sorted. she can be more on the mean side when she’s upset, but even then she does not have a bad heart at all

when it comes to relationships, blair is all over the place. she can be very flirty/charismatic and is constantly hopping from one relationship to the next. she hasn’t quite been able to settle down, but it is possible. she kind of thinks being in a real relationship means losing her freedom, because that’s kind of what she saw happen with her parents, so she doesn’t really want to be tied down to someone in fear of losing herself in a way. does this make sense ? maybe ? ok !

blair has a fairly strong sense of self, but she’s still very young so she’s still growing and changing. she is the type of person to know what she wants and go after it ( yes, even with ppl ! ). she will stop at nothinggg to get what she wants ( oop ). u could say she loves the chase, but kind of gets bored afterwards unless u have more to offer !

omg she literally loves 2 be the center of attention. i mean, who doesn’t love attention ? but blair takes it 2 another level. she gets all :( if she’s being ignored or isn’t receiving enough attention

kind of bouncing off the whole attention thing, blair loves a good party ! she’s young and here for a good time. she def loves to drink at parties and stuff even tho she isn’t legal here in the us, why should that stop her am i right ? when it comes to drugs, she’s a veryyy casual user and doesn’t do anything crazy. a social weed smoker n will do pills here and there

being a libra sun with a leo moon, i think it’s safe to say she can be a bit dramatic at times ( i mean, as a libra sun with a leo venus i am not one 2 judge xx ). she reads 2 much and watches 2 many movies like ajkdhsjkhd life rly isn’t that serious but she can b a lil overdramatic sometimes whew ! we told u this was melodrama ... lorde stans make some noise !

blair’s fav books are anything by jane austen and les liaisons dangereuses by pierre choderlos de laclos, aka the book cruel intentions was based on ( which happens 2 be one of her fav movies )

shows she loves: gossip girl ( she shares a name w blair so she probably used 2 call herself queen b in high school or something ), desperate housewives ( no wonder this binch is so dramatic ), big little lies, pretty little liars ( the early seasons only ), the netflix show baby, and buffy the vampire slayer

movies she loves: clueless, almost famous, thoroughbreds, moulin rouge, palo alto, marie antoinette, coyote ugly, american beauty, cruel intentions, and valley of the dolls ( to name a few )

her fav colors are pink, red, and white !

u can find her pinterest board here.

she is bisexual babey !!

(   𝑾𝑨𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑫 𝑪𝑶𝑵𝑵𝑬𝑪𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺.   )

party buddies - this is pretty basic and self explanatory, but someone blair can go out and have fun with. their friendship might be more surface level, or started that way at least, but it’s possible they’re closer friends ( maybe she opened up under the influence and it brought them closer aksdhsdjh drunk blair def would )

ex-fling/gf/bf - blair relationship hops, so she could have quite a few of these. we can plot it however, there can b feelings there, they can hate each other, of they can be just friends now, u name it !

unrequited crush -  ur character could have feelings for blair, but maybe she doesn’t feel them back or is unaware that they like her. this could develop into her eventually having feelings for ur muse or not, whatever we want ! OR blair could def have a crush on someone who does not like her back. maybe that person is super non-committal, or they simply do not like her back. we could plot this out however <3

current fling/friends w benefits - someone she is currently seeing/sleeping with. could be no strings attached, or there could b some feelings there. maybe they don’t want to make it anything serious, or maybe they’re ready to take it to the next level. maybe one person is ready to go further, and the other isn’t.

enemies w benefits - imagine the tension!!! they started out hating each other, but ended up hooking up. maybe it was a one time thing, or maybe they can’t stop going back to each other. i think it would b cool if they kept it a secret, they don’t want anyone else to know. this could develop in soooo many ways !

ex-friends - someone she used to consider a close friend, but they had a falling out for whatever reason n maybe they hate each other now. maybe they want to re-kindle their friendship but don’t know how

sibling-like friendship - someone she sees like a sibling. they’re there for each other and look out for one another, always have each other’s backs. being an only child and not really close to her parents, blair would love a friend that she could basically call family !

dynamic duo - basically like her current best friend. this person is prob one of the closest people to her and knows her very well ! they could b a power duo, always looking out for each other 

take care - someone who kind of looks after her ?? maybe when she parties a lil too hard and drinks a lil too much, someone who kind of takes care of her n makes sure shes ok ! they would be someone she trusts a lottttt

confidant - someone who confides in her or someone she confides in, or they confide in each other. they don’t necessarily have to be the closest friends ever, but they get along, trust each other, and maybe they talk more in private

rivals - they hate each other for whatever reason. maybe it’s jealousy or their personalities just clash, but for whatever reason they do not get along. i love a good enemies plot. they can just b nasty to each other !!! maybe they bring out a really bad side to blair that most ppl dont see. someone who makes her act like blair waldorf ( i’m def kidding abt the blair waldorf part )

bad influence - blair isn’t a goody-two-shoes by any means, but doesn’t really do anything crazy, so i’d luvv for someone to kind of influence her to do shit she normally wouldn’t on her own

these are all the plot ideas i can think of for now, but i’ll prob make a plots page later on and add more stuff !

so this is everything !! this has taken me longer than it should have but i’m finally done whew,,, cheers 2 me <3 anyway i would absolutely luv to plot, so feel free to hit me up on discord or tumblr im’s, or i can also come to u ! i’m so excited to get started <333 i’m gonna b logging off now most likely, since it’s 3 am my time, but i’ll be back in the morning

[peachyrm]

i feel like a lot of ppl on this site see a callout post for BTS, look at all of the problematic things they did in the past, and immediately ‘cancel’ them or see that as a valid reason to finally hate them or kpop in general, without considering the context of the situations or how the kpop industry works.

im definitely not here to defend the things they said or did, because it WAS gross. but those things are also from 3-5 years ago, have apologized for or had no control over whether it happened or not.

this post serves as a ‘clearing their name’ type of post, and will actually take a look into the problematic things theyve done and how they dealt with it, along with all the positive things they have done in the past few years. it will be pretty lengthy and will have lots of sources/screenshots. before i get into this though, i want to say that no one is obligated to like BTS, or forgive them for what they/their label did. you reserve the right to feel the way you feel, however that may be. that being said, this post is for people who never saw the apologies, who vaguely know who BTS are and saw only bad things about them, who want to get into BTS but aren’t sure if they’re extremely problematic, and more.

starting off, i want to explain the context behind the links of this post. i would link the original, but op has deleted it. so, obviously, yes bts did do all of the above. but like i said before, it was 3-5 (now, technically 6) years ago. when BTS debuted in 2013, they were all 21 or under. 15-16 year old Jungkook being the youngest, and Seokjin being the oldest at 21. they were merely teenagers and on top of this, had no or very little control of their self image. the hairstyles & photoshoots, the boys had no control over. bighit and bts’ stylists are in charge of these things. if you want someone to be angry at, be angry at bighit, bts’ label company. this includes RM’s hairstyle back in the ‘No More Dream’ era / early debut days, Suga’s dreads, and any other hairstyle, clothing, or photoshoot that caused controversy. (in case anyone, who isn’t familiar with kpop, is confused; kpop label companies usually control everything their idols do. from what they wear, to what their songs are about, to if they’re even allowed to date. it’s a very disgusting industry that has a history of abuse, but that’s an entirely different subject i could get into.)

here is an article where BigHit apologizes for the antisemitism + the ‘bombing’ shirt Jimin wore, and they explicitly state that “the band members were ‘in no way responsible’ for the controversy.” which further proves my point that the boys had no control over what they wore/how they looked.

here is a thread about RM’s racist behavior in the past, and admitting + apologizing for what he did, including how he has changed certain lyrics of songs because they could be seen as (or were) misogynist. to this day, RM hates and regrets how his hair looked at the time.

in case anyone doesn’t want to read the entire thread, RM says this: “As I went through the year 2016 I came to think about that. My words or behaviors, regardless of my intentions, could cause troubles or hurt others feelings. In the process, I thought I need to hold responsibility for that and I need to think about such things. What I said or did would not be undone. I thought so. Then I learned how to admit myself. [...] Anyways, to become a better person, I need to hold responsibility for what I do. I need to change my mindset. I need to change my way of thinking if it’s wrong. I learned I need to hear from many people. I mean, I came to think like that. Now when I do something, I think, ‘how would people feel about my act?’” 

again, this is not excuses for what they did, but rather how/why it happened or how they had no choice in the matter & what they had to say about it afterwards. BTS are living, growing people who have acknowledged their mistakes and apologized. in RM’s speech at the U.N. he says this: “Maybe I made a mistake yesterday, but yesterday’s me is still me. I am who I am today, with all my faults. Tomorrow I might be a tiny bit wiser, and that’s me, too. These faults and mistakes are what I am, making up the brightest stars in the constellation of my life. I have come to love myself for who I was, who I am, and who I hope to become.”

since the apology part of this post is mostly over, i wanted to talk about the good things that bts has done in the past few years. things like their continuous support of the LGBT community, the powerful messages in their music, the bending of the ‘typical kpop style’, etc.

-

over the years and as their popularity grew, BTS have actually managed to seemingly take more control over what they stand for and how they present themselves and their music. since around 2017, BTS have made a very impactful social stance with their string of albums & their concept: “Love Yourself”. for people who don’t know, this concept consists of three albums over the course of 2016-2018 and are in order as follows: LOVE YOURSELF 承 'Her', LOVE YOURSELF 轉 'Tear' LOVE YOURSELF 結 'Answer'

the summarized version of the stories are love at first sight, the failing/one-sided-ness of said love, and then learning how to love and accept yourself before you are fully able to love others. along with this concept came the partnership with the anti-violence campaign, UNICEF, who work to protect young people from all over the world. the entire album concept consistently promotes self-love and acceptance, something that is not very explored in kpop or even western pop music in general. while some of the songs in “LY: Her” use female pronouns, almost all the rest of them across all the albums use gender neutral or no pronouns. this was done intentionally by RM (who writes/produces a majority of their songs), as he believes “feelings/love transcend genders, cultures, and barriers between people.” the title song of “LY: Her”, “DNA”, (as stated in the screenshot) further expresses this idea with the lyrics: “None of this is a coincidence Because we’re the two who found our destiny - I only focus on you You steer me a little harder The DNA of the genesis wants you This is inevitable, I love us We are the only true lovers”

and in “Serendipity”, as well:

“The universe has moved for us Without missing a single thing Our happiness was meant to be Cuz you love me, and I love you”

while, obviously, there is one ‘her’ pronoun in the song, most of it expresses what RM says. and bighit being bighit, im sure they had some say in how the lyrics were presented, esp since it was the title song. what i’m trying to say is that i truly believe BTS are doing their best to support the lgbt community, even with the tight restrictions that their label and the kpop genre puts on them. being on the topic of LGBT+ and support of the community, here is suga pretty much saying he’s bi. + and of course, his iconic lyrics in “Cypher Pt.3″

here is the bisexual flag colors in j-hope’s music video for his song “Daydream”.

RM saying he liked “Same Love” twice as much after reading about the lyrics, and Suga outright saying “Nothing is wrong. Everyone is equal.” in the first screenshot.

Jungkook’s love and support for troye sivan + Jimin wearing jeans with lyrics of troye sivan’s “Youth” on them

bts defying gender norms over and over and over.

fondness & friendship with/of multiple lgbt artists

RM referencing the film “Moonlight” in the song “4 O’Clock”

RM wrote the lyrics for GLAM’s song “XXO”,  that say “Are you a boy? Girl? I don’t care, passion is the key”

Jungkook and Jimin covering the song “We Don’t Talk Anymore” and not changing the pronouns.

an excerpt from RM’s speech at the U.N. ;  “Tell me your story. I want to hear your voice, and I want to hear your conviction. No matter who you are, where you’re from, your skin color, gender identity: speak yourself.” + full transcript here.

and these are just things i can think of off the top of my head. as for their political stance and social messages in their music, & talking about other things considered taboo in kpop (such as mental health/illness), here you go:

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suga talking about (his) mental health and struggles in various songs on his mixtape.

their ENTIRE “IDOL” music video is basically a response to how people stereotype them/the kpop genre & have said that they are “too westernized”. the song includes a “traditional African-Korean sound”, the boys wearing hanboks/traditional korean clothing, on top of lots of korean history references & symbolism, and how they take pride in what they do. here is a really good video analyzing & explaining the mv. heres 3 more posts explaining why it sounds/looks the way it does, and how BTS did it intentionally. in case nobody has seen/heard the song, here is the first verse: “You can call me artist (artist) You can call me idol (idol) No matter what you call me I don’t care I’m proud of it”

the song “Epiphany” on “LY: Answer”, is (as you can imagine) a song about having an epiphany about loving yourself. the lyrics are pretty self-explanatory. the chorus: “I’m the one I should love in this world Shining me, precious soul of mine I finally realized so I love me Not so perfect but so beautiful I’m the one I should love”

RM talking about his mental health/depression in “Forever Rain” on his mixtape “mono.” + as well as in “Reflection.” the outro of the song which i wanted to add, is just a repeated “I wish I could love myself.”

the lyrics to the song “I’m Fine” on LY: Answer express being able to love yourself without relying on somebody to fix you or make you happier, because only you can complete yourself.

the outro to the album, “Answer: Love Myself” concludes the Love Yourself album series, and has extremely beautiful lyrics. the full translation here, if anyone wants to read all of them. it’s about, as im sure you can guess, loving yourself even with all your flaws and mistakes & striving to be a better person each day.

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SO TLDR; BTS absolutely have made mistakes, like every person does, but have apologized and learned from those mistakes. they have moved on, and have done more good in this world than bad. they have grown over the past 6 years and continue to grow every single day. as a young gay fan, their message and their presence means a lot to me. that fact that they’re so popular and use that power to spread kindness & self-acceptance (no matter Who you are), is really important especially in today’s society. doubly to youth who, themselves, struggle with mental illness and family issues, school/education, and any typical problem young people face in their lives. i have struggled with self-hate, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, trauma, the whole ordeal. their songs have helped me heal, even if only a little. and they give me another reason to keep going everyday. even if you don’t like their music or the boys themselves, there is no denying the positive impact they’ve made on millions of people, adults and children alike. BTS are absolutely not perfect, but they acknowledge this and do their best to BE the best they can be.

[exowolf-reactions]

Lol I honestly feel bad because maybe about 6 months ago i was still that ot9 trash for exo like i really just scream and buy their goods regardless of weather yixing ( MY ULTIMATE BIAS ) is included or nah, but like slowly i feel like i’m more of a solo stan now? ( mind u ppl i dont say shit bout yhe others ). And i slowly really hate that some ppl who claims they miss yixing but probably didn’t even support his solo? Just so ugh kinda understand why solo cfans hate like ‘ot9’ stans

I hate that there is this separation between the fans like, Exo is to Yixing like Yixing is to EXO. And I understand fans get impatient and think he left but when are people going to grab a newspaper and read about government relations or simply google a little about it and understand that no matter how fucking big EXO and Lay are, even SM, they aren’t countries. Being a public figure isn’t easy okay? There are decisions that are made without them having control of them and yes it is sad but that’s how the world sadly works. 

So for fans to say he left or he doesn’t love EXO or whatever please don’t. Please stay quiet at least. Because things aren’t that easy as to hate and love. 

And it is true it is annoying that they say they miss him but what are they doing for him? Have you heard his new song? Bought his album or at least listened to it? Even watched the MV? Like fandom, we support EXO but we also support each one of them and that includes Lay who is kinda “exiled” unwillingly. So I do understand your point. 

Plus Lay has been doing amazingly being solo and I am very proud but sometimes I do feel he misses them and EXO misses him and I pray we get a complete ot9 one day again. Meanwhile, we should show our love and support, however, we can and that includes supporting their solo activities.