#he looks funky I'm keeping it

[platykool]

tEZCAT MY BABY

[caterjunes]

basement flooded last night (again! i rly feel like the prev owners fully lied about how often this happens) so i got to spend the Whole day dealing with that

chest & throat hurt, had a couple coughing bouts this evening. i took a Good covid test the other day bc my throat was sore & it came back negative but. i'm worried.

still tired from PT, have not really given myself/had an opportunity to properly rest (i was planning on it today but then basement flood!)

the rest of our house is a mess again

i saw a video of an ancient hairless ferret and it reminded me so much of peach bellini that i sobbed for ten minutes straight

[hicchanpicchan]

I'm gonna say something that's none of my business but it's been stewing as background noise in my head for a while and it has just now popped out as a proper thought so I feel the urge to share it somewhere

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.

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I don't think David Tennant is cishet.

[bigbrainbiology]

So Pokemon Scarlet is is going great and I have adopted so many children <3

[a-simple-spiders-oc-dump]

NEW AND IMPROVED INFO ON UNIVERSE 1 AND THE FUNNY LITTLE GUYS WHO LIVE THERE

I decided to make an update to the original info post I made, since I changed the canon a lot since I made it. Plus, the old one was based on an even older character doc that didn't go into very much detail and omitted a few decently major characters. So, what the hell!! New year new info.

THE BASIC PREMISE:

A young sorta-goddess named Alice was born alongside her own personal pocket dimension to rule over and expand at her leisure. After many years of this, Alice decides she wants to make the perfect friend for herself, but in creating Mikayla, she accidentally makes her perfect nightmare instead. Mikayla turns against her creator, forming a pact with the monstrous Breaks to act as their commander in exchange for her world's eventual destruction, and Alice does not have the strength to create her own army to oppose them. In desperation, Alice turns her sights back to the Earth she was born to, and begins to build her army a different way - with the souls of those who died young and unhappy. The story follows the humans trapped in Alice's domain as they fight to survive in the hopes of one day thriving in this strange new world, while still struggling to deal with the scars from their pasts. The main story takes place sometime around 2016-2018.

SOME WARNINGS: mentions of death, abuse, school shootings, human experimentation, body horror, murder, bullying, car crashes and suicide. none of these will be discussed in depth (outside of the death part, since I will be mentioning how each of Alice’s soldiers died, and potentially the body horror part when it comes to describing Alice's guards), and will only be briefly mentioned, but I felt it was worth adding this warning nonetheless. let me know if there’s anything else I should add to this warnings list, and I’ll make sure to add that warning both to this and any future piece that may contain that particular content.

NOTABLE TERMS:

Authors - Someone with power over a Realm. The name is a shortened version of the word “authority”, as well as the term 'author/auteur' as used to refer to the primary creator of different forms of art. They look like normal people in their home worlds, but are reality-warping gods in their Realms. They can either be born this way (Founding Authors) or can be turned into an Author by a different Author (Inherited Authors). If an Author dies and hasn’t selected anyone to be their ‘heir’, their Realm crumbles and dies. The term has some variations - Alice, for example, refers to herself as an ‘Authoress’ as a more fancy and feminine version of it - though ‘Author’ itself is considered a gender-neutral term. They have a tendency to become fixated on making specific types of objects/creatures, and they become more and more powerful the more they create, though if they use their abilities too much too quickly, their bodies can begin to auto-cannibalize themselves similar to starvation in order to keep feeding their powers.

Realms - Miniature universes created by an Author’s birth, sometimes considered to be the Author’s twin. They are sentient to some extent, though are so different from most lifeforms that they cannot communicate aside from puppeteering creatures (usually Creations) to do their bidding. Their Author(s) keeps them stable, and if the only Author dies without picking a replacement, they do too. The majority of the story takes place in one of these Realms (exceptions being prequel short stories that take place on Earth). 

Creations - Living creatures made by Authors to serve a specific role in their Realms. Creations are given a ‘purpose’ by their Author that forms the backbone of their identities, which can range from specific tasks they must fulfill to simply live however they choose. Aside from that, they can look like practically anything, and their mindsets can range dramatically from "exists only to perform this particular task with no individual personality to speak of" to "smarter than a human with a clear and defined sense of identity". Think of them as biological robots - some are closer to androids in sci-fi media, while others are more similar to roombas, but they're all classified under the same umbrella.

Breaks - Hive monsters that spawn in the void between worlds, meant to be one part training and one part punishment for Authors who break the Unspoken Rules (which are unspoken because no one really knows what they are). They can form pacts with Real creatures as well as Creations to grant them powers in exchange for the individual becoming the focal point of their hive mind, and want nothing more than to devour Realms from the insides out. 

Life Force - The energy that keeps all living creatures alive. Humans are the baseline, with a reasonable amount of Life Force that can allow for bursts of incredible strength, speed and mental processing when in life-threatening situations; Creations have about half to three-quarters the Life Force of a human, as they typically do not need to ever use it and all of their Life Force must be provided by their Author when they're created; and Authors have the abilities they do because they have an abnormal amount of Life Force that only grows larger and larger the longer they live, and the ability to manipulate it at will. Life Force can only be drained by either using abilities that require Life Force, or by spending time in a universe that is not your own. If drained, the affected creature will grow more and more emaciated before beginning to decay alive.

CHARACTERS IN THE REALM/UNIVERSE 1:

(please note that even after all this time, a lot of these guys don’t have fully solid designs - I’m more of a writer than an artist and character designs don’t mean much when you’re not using a visual medium lol. I have at least vague ideas on how all of them look and I do want to give those ocs with less solid looks permanent designs in the future, but for now???? ehhhhhhhhhhhh I’d rather focus on the writing part lmao)

THE NEWCOMERS

Lydia

Age: 16 (nearly 17)

Role in the story: Protagonist

Appearance: Chubby girl with long, wavy blonde hair, warm-toned beige skin and blue eyes. Around 5'5-5'8. Wears a long, loose grey t-shirt with cut-out shoulders and a distinctive blue butterfly design with diamond-like wings on the bottom-left corner. This matches her prized necklace, which always hangs around her neck on a long chain, and her hairclip that pins the left side of her hair out of her eyes.

Rapid-fire personality info: -One of the two protagonists of the main story.

-Calm and friendly, always trying to see the best in others. Her life's motto is very much "hope for the best and prepare for the worst".

-Deeply committed to helping people, even at the expense of her own health - definitely fits the “paragon” archetype and will do anything if she thinks it’s for the good of those around her.

-Wanted to be a therapist someday so that she could improve peoples’ lives, and reads about psychology often in pursuit of that goal. She still wants to find a way to make use of her knowledge in her new situation, but isn’t sure how.

-Grew up moving from town to town after her mother passed away from a terminal illness; as such, she’s gotten very good at reading people and figuring out what makes them tick. (She’s not always as right about them as she thinks she is, though.)

-Feels her emotions intensely, and often cries when overwhelmed or scared, much to her own frustration.

-Can’t handle horror well at ALL, which makes it all the harder for her to adjust to her new life in the Realm. She never quite gets used to Alice’s side of the Realm, preferring to stick closer to the Soldier’s Camp.

-Just wants things to be okay and for everyone to be safe and sound. This is a much more complicated goal than it sounds, but by god is she determined to give it her best shot!

-Outside of reading about things like grief counseling and psychological disorders, she enjoys photography and doing little DIY projects to decorate her living space with; definitely the type to have one of those strings of Polaroids in her room that all the old aesthetic blogs back in 2013 loved.

-Has the ability to see the memories of others through her dreams. Big side effect is that whatever memory she brings up will be re-experienced by the memory’s owner while she does so, and considering almost everyone in the Realm has some sort of trauma, she needs to be careful what she makes them re-live. She also hates it in general because she really doesn’t want to breach her new friends’ privacy, but she doesn’t have a choice in the matter.

-Died in a car crash.

SINCLAIR HELLSPARK!

Age: 16

Role in the story: Protagonist

Appearance: Dresses more like they’re from an RPG than the same Earth Alice’s soldiers came from, or at least as close to that as they could get from the local thrift shop. (Dress for the world you want, not the world you have!) The most prominent part of their outfit is a long, slightly oversized brown leather trench coat that goes halfway down Sinclair’s calves, with a strip of red cloth pinned underneath the jacket’s collar roll to mimic a cape. The coat is left open to reveal a black t-shirt and black pants underneath, the latter being ragged at the bottom hems, with a pair of brown combat boots. (I could also see them drawing fake magic circles and runes and shit on the inside of their jacket or down the sides of their pants in gold fabric paint.) They wear a belt around their waist (unconnected to their pants) with a couple of satchels on it to store things, mostly small trinkets and snacks they’ve “borrowed” over time.

Rapid fire info: -One of the two protagonists of the main story.

-Boisterous, loud-mouthed, and generally seen as a pretty cheerful person, though they can also come across as a bit overwhelming and annoying without realizing; a large ham through and through.

-Grew up in a neglectful household and were never quite able to make friends. After a bit, they gave up on trying to get people to like them (kind of) (not really) (they tell themself that, anyway) and decided to just get real weird with it in a way they personally find cool.

-Likes to proclaim that they’re a powerful sorcerer, blessed by the spirit of a dragon to seek out the world’s oddities and protect the innocent with their powers and wit; they will threaten to curse people they don’t like and claim to cast blessings on people who are nice to them, though these never have any effect. Sinclair knows it’s bullshit but it’s FUN bullshit so they don’t plan to stop any time soon.

-Has a bit of Main Character Syndrome, fully believing that their life can and will play out like a story. They try to be genre-savvy in real life and have a tendency to assign character archetypes to people around them, no matter how little they fit that role. (For example, within an hour of meeting Lydia, Sinclair declares that she MUST be their rival.)

-Impulsive; they tend to leap before they look and don’t give enough thought as to how their actions might affect people around them. They’re prone to bouts of arrogance and can’t stand being underestimated.

-Genuinely wanted to get trapped in another world before ending up in the Realm, and are one of the few people to take to the Realm like a duck to water, though they quickly learn to be careful what they wish for.

-LOVES cryptozoology and parapsychology; their back-up dream if they didn’t get isekai’d was to start a cryptid-hunting TV show. They start off as sort of a bit of an overbearing fan towards Gamma, since he’s a figure in local urban legends where Sinclair once lived and they’re overjoyed to learn he’s actually real.

-Sinclair may be cringe but Sinclair is free.

-Died in a car crash.

ALICE’S INNER CIRCLE (+ Mikayla)

Alice

Age: somewhere around 14

Role in the story: Secondary character; an integral figure in the backstory

Appearance: Takes the form of an adorable young girl the majority of the time, with skin that both looks and feels oddly reminiscent of candle wax, owlish brown eyes and straight black hair that falls to her waist. She wears an opulent, knee-length dress reminiscent of a kid’s princess/queen costume. It has a square neckline, puffed sleeves with strips of brown fabric falling to her wrists, corset lacing in the shape of a heart on her stomach, a grey sash tied around her waist in a bow on her back, and brown skirt split in the center to reveal layers of translucent yellow fabric, surrounded by gold embroidery. Sometimes, Alice's soldiers have claimed to see her hair or pieces of her outfit move on their own. This is somehow one of the least weird things about her.

Rapid fire info: -Created the Realm and has god-like powers of reality-warping and creation; she refuses to let anyone forget either of these facts.

-Childish, and acts either cheerful or annoyed about 90% of the time.

-Callous and selfish, often disregarding human suffering as ‘not her problem’ despite being one of the very few people actively bringing them to her world in the first place; generally dislikes humans and especially adults (outside of Gamma, who looks and behaves like one), refusing to allow them into her home; she’d likely do this for all humans if not for the current situation.

-The only person she seems to care about besides herself is Gamma, owing to the long history the two share together and the deep trust that’s formed as a result, which tends to surprise people thanks to the two of them seeming like complete opposites. Gamma helps Alice work through her ideas and points out flaws in her plans, especially when it comes to aspects of humanity Alice is blind to; in return, Alice makes Gamma things she thinks will make him happy and helps to keep him grounded on difficult days, even if she doesn’t fully understand what he’s going through.

-Experiments with her powers for fun, with her most common experiment being the creation of a living creature without really paying attention and then taking it apart while it’s still alive to see what she got wrong. (This is essentially the Author equivalent of life drawing. Still more gruesome than it needs to be, though!)

-Hates admitting things that she sees as a blight on her reputation as an Author (i.e. caring about people, feeling emotions other than joy and rage, wanting to do things other than create, being wrong, etc.), as she takes great pride in her status.

-Morphs into a much less friendly looking version of herself when pissed off, and is prone to having her skin melt like she’s a wax figure when sufficiently annoyed. Even in her ‘normal’ form, her skin is noticeably cold, as though she’s a living corpse, and she often grins with a few more teeth than humans should have.

-She’s basically a weird little girl who was given god-like powers by chance and then let loose on the multiverse.

-If she dies, something terrible will happen…

Mikayla

Age: Has existed for 4 years (behaves and is generally treated like she’s in her late teens/early twenties)

Role in the story: Primary antagonist; an integral figure in the backstory

Appearance: Has replaced her face with a white, porcelain mask decorated with red swirls, and does not appear to have any hair. Her skin tone matches Alice’s - pale like candle wax - though it’s mostly covered by a long, hooded, ivory cloak and the black, veined bodysuit underneath that holds her body together as she regenerates. She’s probably around 5'8-5'10.

Rapid fire info: -Alice’s Creation, meant to be the perfect friend; unfortunately, to Alice this meant ‘basically a carbon copy of myself but taller’, which wound up backfiring horribly once Mikayla learned that she didn’t share Alice’s level of control over the Realm while still sharing Alice’s massive ego.

-Cut off her face to seal her pact with the Breaks, who gave her regenerative powers and limited ability to use portals; now wears a porcelain mask as a replacement face, and uses her cloak to mask her limbs as they regrow.

-Extremely manipulative, and does not take being told “no” well; she’s a massive control freak and tends to lash out without remorse when someone goes against her wishes.

-Switches personas on a whim, going from calm and collected to rage-fueled screaming on a hair trigger when she thinks it will keep people in line. She's very unpredictable as a result, and her soldiers walk on eggshells around her in a vain attempt to keep her from lashing out at them.

-Has a personal grudge against Alice, since Mikayla views Alice simply being alive as both a threat and an insult, and Gamma, since he made many attempts to stop her from achieving her goal to kill Alice. As such, she will do whatever she can to torment and torture them - especially Gamma, as a punishment for him not joining her mutiny.

-She’s basically the most destructive kind of sadism in humanoid form. Just an awful person who takes pleasure in hurting anyone she views as a potential enemy - including those on her own side, if she thinks it will keep them under her thumb.

-Has died at least three times before the main story starts. Unfortunately, this hasn’t stopped her.

Gamma

Age: Has existed for around 8 years (behaves and is generally treated like an adult)

Role in the story: Deuteragonist; a mentor figure for Sinclair; an integral figure in the backstory

Appearance: Very tall (around 6'7-6'10), extremely pale (to the point where other characters’ narrations have remarked he looks like he’s never gone out in the sun in his life), and muscular by necessity for his job. Has black hair that’s always slicked back to his head and golden eyes that never blink with noticeable dark circles underneath. Wears a black suit with a white dress shirt and golden tie underneath. While the suit repairs itself after fights, the lapels and wrists of his sleeves are permanently tattered due to his jacket being a prototype by Alice (Alice could make him a better one now, but he got attached to the original, much to Alice’s chagrin - it’s like a family member hanging an old piece of art you did in high school in their living room to her). His skin on his arms and legs is a slightly different shade from the skin on his head and torso.

Rapid fire info: -A Creation whose guiding purpose is to protect Alice and her Realm; this quickly extended to the human soldiers once he learned how fragile they truly were. He’s tasked himself with keeping an eye on Alice’s other guards to make sure they’re doing their jobs properly, too. 

-Also in charge of the transportation of the dead teenagers from their world to the Realm. Most of the soldiers don’t like associating with him due to this fact, and a good chunk of them outright despise him for being the one to directly trap them in this place.

-Reserved, serious, and excessively secretive. That last part is largely because he’s not one hundred percent sure what does and does not unnerve humans, and so he tends to hide information he thinks might cause them distress, even if it ends up being something benign.

-Constantly researching things like anthropology, sociology, psychology and history just for fun, since he finds Earth absolutely fascinating. It’s basically an alien planet to him, and he has a deep respect for its inhabitants. Alice has joked on occasion that he’d start a human fanclub “if he had ten percent less dignity and anyone who’d join it.”

-One of the few people Alice views as something close to an equal, which is more than anybody else can say. This is due to their long history together, which according to Gamma, includes her saving his life numerous times, and led to him becoming her bodyguard to return the favour.

-Has been through Some Shit before the wars even began, and his mental health is incredibly poor as a result; he blames himself whenever things go wrong in the Realm out of reflex, tends to have extreme fight-or-flight responses to perceived threats, has a self-esteem in the negatives and copes by being almost fanatically devoted to his given role compared to Alice’s other guards. Most notably, he seems to fall into extreme panic when surrounded by the colour teal…

-Seems to have some odd abilities that it’s assumed Alice gave him, since he’s much stronger than a normal human and has a tendency to know things he really has no right knowing (the latter is thanks to him constantly hearing the thoughts of everyone around him; it’s less of a power to him and more like a sense. He fully believed this was a Normal Human Experience for most of his life, and when he learned the humans weren’t letting him read their thoughts willingly, it freaked him out badly enough that he suppressed this ability as best as he could manage, to the point where all he hears now are muted whispers unless he directly ‘tunes in’.)

-Is absolutely bewildered by Sinclair not only tolerating him but actually seeming to enjoy his presence, and he warms up to them over the course of the story.

-this man has so much going on with him I swear to fuck. he's kind of the default protagonist for anything taking place before Lydia and Sinclair show up on the timeline, and he’ll probably be in a LOT of the prompt fills lmao

-Hasn’t died yet, despite the universe’s best attempts.

ALICE'S SOLDIERS

Cynthia

Age: 17

Role in the story: Secondary character, somewhat of a mentor figure for Lydia and Sinclair; an integral figure in the backstory

Appearance: No solid outfit design just yet. (Her old outfit was designed when I was around 14 years old and included a t-shirt that said ���#SWAG’ on it. I wish I was fucking joking.) What I know for now is she has olive-toned skin and a bob hair cut, dyed a dark blue/indigo, along with grey, almost silver eyes. She likely has a muscular build out of necessity, and probably wears something simple and easy to move in in case of a surprise attack.

Rapid fire info: -Co-leader of the Soldier’s Camp; also one of the very first humans in the Realm.

-Used to be somewhat snarky with a heart of gold shining through, but the massacre that was the First Break War made her withdraw to the point that she’s become extremely stoic.

-Asked Alice to remove her memories of her past life during the First Break War so they wouldn’t hold her back; some suspect Alice took a little more than just that.

-Hard to read, and comes off as cold to most people, only really opening up to Dylan since they went through the First Break War together, and forged a deep trust as a result. She’s usually the one to push him to go and rest when he starts putting too much on his shoulders (and he’s usually quick to point out how hypocritical it is for her of all people to say this, lmao)

-Focuses mostly on strategy, supplies and upkeep of the camp while Dylan takes care of the human element. Extremely practical and a bit of a workaholic, to the point of requesting a murphy bed for her bedroom so she could use it as an office (with her reasoning being, “there’s no point in having two separate rooms when one could serve the same purpose.”).

-Is responsible for multiple quality of life features for the Camp in some way, including walkie-talkies the soldiers can use to warn everyone of potential attacks and repurposing some areas of the under-populated camp to be for storage of emergency supplies. Spends much of her time considering what she could request to improve things further.

-Almost all the soldiers see her as the Realm’s ultimate authority figure due to her strict nature - considering Dylan’s more relaxed attitude and Alice being… well, Alice - though some (like Morgan and Sydney) aren’t afraid to talk back to her if they feel like it.

-Deeply despises Gamma for reasons even she doesn’t fully understand; it seems to stem from the time right before she got her mind-wipe. He’s the only person she’ll actively lash out against, and he never so much as protests.

-Has a love of music, and if she isn’t busy working to make sure the camp has everything it needs to keep everyone happy and healthy, she can typically be found in her room, listening to music on a pair of headphones and tuning out the world. (Though, naturally, she keeps her walkie-talkie on her at all times in case of emergencies.)

-Her cause of death is unknown, though it’s assumed she was stabbed or impaled in some way due to her death scar (a large, jagged cut just below her ribcage).

Dylan

Age: 18

Role in the story: Secondary character, mentor figure for Lydia

Appearance: No solid design just yet. What I know for now is that he has sepia/brown skin, short hair, and mostly wears a faded blue hoodie over a black t-shirt and a pair of navy blue jeans. (Outfit might change with time)

Rapid fire info: -Co-leader of the Soldier’s Camp.

-Generally a relaxed, optimistic person who does his best to keep the morale of the camp high; he’s basically what Lydia wishes she could be, and he quickly takes her under his wing once he realizes how much she reminds him of both himself and Cynthia when they first arrived.

-Helps newcomers get settled in the Camp, and acts as mediator for disagreements; some joke that he’s essentially the camp’s HR guy, or sarcastically call him the “Camp’s Counselor”. Most of the younger members look up to him like an older brother, and it’s a role he’s happily taken to (largely as a way to cope with missing his family from Earth deeply - especially his younger sister, Dawn, who he was once very close with).

-Doesn’t talk about his own problems much to avoid troubling people, though most are aware that he gets severe anxiety upon hearing gunshots and will warn him if a movie or game will contain them. Everyone in the camp thinks he came out of the First Break War unscathed because of this, since he doesn't really show any signs of trauma from it. He absolutely did not.

-One of the few who spoke with Gamma before they died; as such, he’s one of the few soldiers who isn’t all that intimidated by his presence, and often goes to speak with Alice and Gamma on the camp’s behalf. One of his weekly chores is to just gather everyone’s requests and bring them to Alice’s Manor, since he’s the only one willing to do it.

-Used to be in the swim team in his school and played in a band with his two best friends - Tyler and Kieran - since the beginning of high school (he did guitar and backup vocals). He was also often among the top five highest-scoring students in many of his classes. Unfortunately, most of these skills and achievements are completely useless in the Realm, much to his chagrin.

-Still enjoys playing the guitar and regularly requests sheet music to learn new songs in his free time, as well as coming up with new ones on his own. Sometimes, he plays for Cynthia while they’re relaxing. He knows all of her favourite songs by heart at this point.

-Died in a school shooting.

Morgan

Age: 18

Role in the story: Secondary character

Rapid fire info: -Medic for the Soldier’s Camp

Appearance: Has albinism, so her hair is a very pale grey (long, but often pulled back into a bun, with lash-grazing bangs), her skin is pale and pinkish, and her eyes are red (which is actually very uncommon for people with albinism, but considering her spite towards Alice… Yeah, they weren’t always that colour). She’s noticeably tall compared to the others - probably around 5'10 - 6'1. She wears a plain white t-shirt with pale grey jeans under a long, burgundy cardigan that falls to the back of her knees in a silhouette similar to a lab coat. Her fingers and lips are permanently discolored from her death, stuck a greyish-blue.

Rapid-fire personality info: -Both a soldier and the senior of the camp’s two medics; she wants to give up her medical duties to stick to solely fighting instead, but she can’t bring herself to dump those responsibilities solely on Trinity’s shoulders.

-Had a rough upbringing where she was put under constant pressure to succeed that burnt her out, and the First Break War killed the last remnants of any optimism Morgan once had; now, she’s resentful towards the world and everyone in it for her shitty circumstances, lashing out at anyone who dares come close to her when she’s in a bad mood (which she nearly always is).

-Known for her sharp tongue, harsh criticisms of others, and tendency to estimate to newcomers’ faces how long she thinks they’ll live - usually no longer than a month - giving her a reputation for being cold and cruel. The twins have nicknamed her “The Ice Queen” because of this.

-At the same time, she is the most skilled soldier the Realm has, considering her incredible combat skill and her high amount of medical knowledge, and she works tirelessly to maintain that status; a perfectionist to her core, Morgan cannot stand being “only” second best.

-Has an ongoing feud with Sydney due to their clashing worldviews - Morgan believing Sydney’s a complete idiot who’s destined to get herself (and possibly others) killed with her thrill-seeking, Sydney believing Morgan’s a killjoy who’s dead set on making a shitty situation even shittier, especially for the newcomers who are already in an incredibly stressful position. Neither are entirely wrong, but neither are entirely right either.

-Is unlikely friends with Trinity, due to Morgan appreciating her dedication to her unwanted role and far better bedside manners, and Morgan does her best to keep her abrasive side to a minimum around Trinity to keep the kid from getting scared of her. Every day, Morgan resents the fact that Trinity ended up in the Realm at all, and she’ll do whatever it takes to keep her from suffering any more than she already has. (There might be a little projection happening there...)

-Isn’t afraid to get her hands dirty if it ends the war faster; to Morgan, the ends ALWAYS justify the means, especially if that end is a future where no one in the camp needs to suffer anymore.

-In what little downtime she allows herself, Morgan can usually be found reading fantasy novels in the camp’s library. Every now and again she’ll also paint with Trinity, if the kid invites her.

-Died of hypothermia

Sydney

Age: 16

Role in the story: Secondary character

Appearance: Has sort of amber-toned skin that’s patched with burn scars from her death, most prominently covering much of the right side of her head and almost the entirety of her hands and forearms. Since the right side of her head can’t grow much hair anymore, her short brown hair is styled into a comb-over, and she has light brown, orange-toned eyes. Wears a black leather jacket over a yellow shirt (which likely has some sort of flame pattern on it that gets covered up by the jacket) and shorts with spiked studs on the left side, with purposefully-ripped black leggings underneath.

Rapid fire info: -A former delinquent with a love of fire who fights Breaks with a nailbat (and occasionally flamethrowers) for the thrill of it all.

-The most Chaotic Good member of the team by far; she doesn’t give a shit about any rules if it means having a great time with her friends. She's decided that if she's stuck in a bad situation, then she's gonna have fun with it and live each day like it's her last.

-Has the most prominent death-scars of any of Alice’s soldiers, and while she was pretty self-conscious of them when she first arrived, she doesn’t really care anymore, proudly wearing outfits that have them on full display. It’s half posturing to make herself seem more badass, and half Sydney trying to show newcomers that their scars are nothing to feel ashamed of.

-An adrenaline junkie at heart. When there aren’t enough Breaks to fight, Sydney will start doing stupid stunts to get the same rush, much to Morgan’s intense chagrin; this directly led to their ongoing animosity in the Main Story.

-Helps train newcomers alongside Dylan; newcomers often see her as a cool big sister figure, but don’t tend to look up to her as much as they look up to Dylan, thanks to Sydney discouraging it and being far more irresponsible in general. 

-She’s kind of the “if I just keep moving at all times then my problems can never catch me!!” type, and tries not to dwell on bad situations any longer than it takes for her to make a shitty joke about them.

-Has always had a certain love for fire, but the stressors of the Realm have turned it into honest pyromania; it’s well-known that when Sydney’s under a lot of stress or incredibly pissed off, she’ll gather random shit and start a bonfire somewhere out in the forest. She is single-handedly responsible for Alice forest-fire-proofing the woods around the camp.

-Is good friends with Troy and Bianca, and she often shirks her duties to hang out with them. They can often be found either in the Main Hall’s living room area watching movies, or in the Hall’s hidden rec room playing different party games with them. (Sydney adores action movies and fighting games the most, along with FPS games.)

-Died in a house fire.

Trinity

Age: 13

Role in the story: Secondary character

Appearance: Looks even younger than her age, with many newcomers mistaking her for being 10 or 11. Has fawn, freckled skin, and dirty blonde hair that’s always pulled into a tight braid over her shoulder, along with deep green eyes. Wears a short/cuffed-sleeve, green button-up shirt with a darker green scarf covering her entire neck, and khaki shorts with cuffs that just barely scrape the tops of her knees.

Rapid fire info: -A girl who turned out to be a medical prodigy, brought into the Realm when they needed medics most - which is all very convenient, isn’t it? :) As of the 'present day’ in story, she’s the junior of the two medics. 

-Extremely timid around people - especially strangers - due to a history of severe bullying; it can take a newcomer weeks to hear her voice for the first time. However, she takes comfort in helping others and is prone to showing a slightly more confident side of herself when doing her job due to the sense of agency it provides her.

-Very self conscious of the bruise on her neck left by her death, often hiding it with a green scarf that also acts as something of a comfort item to her.

-Since she’s easily the youngest and most fragile member of the camp, all of Alice’s soldiers are extremely protective of her, doing whatever they can to keep her away from danger - Morgan especially so, to the point where she’s known to push Trinity away from people who may be dying so that Trinity doesn’t blame herself later if they do pass on. 

-Tries to push Morgan to be less of a jerk to everyone around her; this works, but only when Trinity’s around, much to Trinity’s chagrin. Still, Trinity hopes that one day, Morgan can find some semblance of happiness, or at least peace. 

-When she’s not in the infirmary, Trinity can be found either in her cabin painting, or in the greenhouse with her sketchbook. Natural landscapes and plants are her favourite subjects, and working on art helps to soothe her nerves. She’s pretty good at it for her age, too! Morgan’s cabin is full of her artwork, and she’s also given a couple pieces to Dylan and the twins. 

-Died after falling out of a tree. 

Troy

Age: 15

Role in the story: Secondary character

Appearance: I’ll be honest, I have basically nothing for this kid. I know he probably has shaggy ginger hair, and pale, freckled skin. He’s also probably pretty scrawny. That’s it. That’s all I’ve got for now. I kind of just imagine him as your average freshman tbh, lol

Rapid fire info: -Bianca’s twin brother

-The Realm’s only marksman, due to both how close-quarters Break combat tends to be, and due to Alice not wanting to constantly be using her energy to create ammo (and also to limit the amount of people who can kill her from long-range, should that ever become a problem). He uses specially-made airsoft guns that shoot pellets containing an Alice-made substance; it’s harmless towards humans with a sedative effect after around three to five shots, but an extremely potent acid when used on Breaks. This is largely due to the other soldiers fighting with melee weapons, along with one of their best fighters (Dylan) having trauma surrounding firearms; these guns were specifically made to look and sound different enough that they don’t set off any triggers for him while still being effective long-range weapons, though they do still make Dylan nervous to be around. 

-Troy prefers machines and weapons to people; he can often be found tinkering with various devices around the camp or maintaining his guns to ensure they’re in tip-top shape. Meanwhile, he's often a bit awkward around people, especially those he's unfamiliar with, stumbling on his words and overthinking everything he says.

-The Resident Gamer of the group, with a particular love for retro arcade games. The most likely place to find him is in the camp’s hidden rec room, trying again and again to beat the nigh-impossible high scores Alice sets on each of the arcade cabinets when she makes them. He’s also a fan of FPSes and fighting games, and he and Sydney can spend hours competing to see which of them is the best. 

-Has a bit of social anxiety not helped by Bianca pushing people away from the two of them, nor the fact that they were killed by a classmate who seemed perfectly harmless and friendly at first, giving him some trust issues that he keeps firmly under wraps. 

-Knows he’s a bit boring compared to his sister and their best friend (Sydney), and it bothers him constantly, but he does his best not to let it show. He cares about both of them deeply in spite of this, especially Bianca - despite everything that's happened, she's still the closest person in his life.

-Knows that Bianca has issues due to their deaths, but doesn’t know just how bad those issues are, nor how to properly help her with them; he just does his best to be there for her and hopes it’s enough. (It’s not.) 

-Generally just wants to make the best of the shitty situation he and his sister have been dropped in and stop the wars for good.

-Died by being stabbed three times in the chest.

Bianca

Age: 15

Role in the story: Secondary character

Appearance: Has shoulder-length, ginger hair often pulled into two short pigtails, along with pale, freckled skin and green eyes. Wears a large headbow shaped like a bat, along with a short-sleeved, almost retro-looking, knee-length, plain black dress with a red belt. The belt holds a large pocket knife, as well as a small sack full of throwing knives, in case of an emergency.

Rapid fire info: -Troy’s twin sister

-She and Troy were killed in the same incident - one that Bianca feels responsible for, as she’s the one who trusted their killer the most. Not only that, but she was forced to watch her brother die while being helpless to do anything to stop it. This has led her to become severely over-protective of Troy and extremely paranoid that anyone around them could turn out to be a wolf in sheep’s clothing without warning. 

-Acts cheerful and air-headed around other members of the camp despite this; while part of it is a ploy to get people to underestimate her, it’s mostly genuine - a bit of her old self peeking through the cracks. 

-Has a fixation on knives as a result of her death, seeing them as something powerful, but only as long as they’re in her hands. She’s even been known to threaten people she sees as threats to Troy at knifepoint, though she’s never followed through when called on her bluff. If anyone else wields a knife against her, she panics, sometimes even to the point of passing out.

-Came to trust Sydney after one such incident, where Sydney made it crystal clear to Bianca that she wasn’t about to hurt either of the twins. Looks up to the older soldier quite a bit, and she’s the only person Bianca full-heartedly trusts to be alone with Troy. 

-Was just beginning to really experiment with aesthetics when she died, and while keeping her brother around is her number-one priority, she loves to DIY new decorations for her cabin and often requests different clothing from Alice. 

-Died by being stabbed multiple times in the abdomen.

MIKAYLA'S SOLDIERS 

Dawn

Age: 18

Role in the story: Secondary antagonist

Appearance: I don’t have much for her just yet. What I know for now is that she has sepia/brown skin, eyes that are so dark brown they’re nearly black, has long hair tied into several braids tucked into a ponytail, and probably wears entirely black. I like the idea of her wearing a caplet of some kind. 

Rapid-fire info: -Mikayla’s first success in creating a ‘general’ for her army, through a torturous process that involved trapping Dawn in a series of ever-worsening nightmares that only Mikayla’s intervention would save her from. (Fun fact! This is heavily inspired by a pixel animation on YouTube called Marenol, as well as the song O Light by KikuoHana.) 

-Much like Cynthia, her experiences have left her severely withdrawn and seemingly emotionless, though Dawn is much more apathetic and blunt. She’s become a woman of few words, only speaking in short, clipped sentences when necessary. 

-Has grown resentful of her brother, Dylan, as after his death she felt he had to fill his shoes to keep her family happy; considering that Dylan was naturally gifted in a lot of different areas, this led to Dawn spiraling when she couldn’t live up to those same lofty expectations. 

-Half-believes Mikayla when she says the Soldier’s Camp is inhabited by Alice’s Creations and not real humans; as such, Dawn can be ruthless and cunning on the battlefield, though she hesitates to actually kill anyone. 

-Is deeply terrified of Mikayla, largely because she knows full well that Mikayla could trap her back in the looping nightmares at any point if she messes up. 

-Once each sibling learns that the other is in the Realm, they’re gonna be in for a rough time… 

-I don't have much for her yet, largely because I really wasn't sure what to do with her before this rewrite.

-Committed suicide. 

The Oracle

Age: 17

Role in the story: Secondary antagonist/character 

Appearance: A malnourished girl with unruly brown hair who wears a long white nightgown at all times. Her body is wrapped with bandages, the most notable of which being around her eyes; taking the facial bandages off is not recommended, as it typically results in the Oracle shrieking until they’re returned. 

Rapid-fire info: -A failed experiment of Mikayla’s to get a human to use Life Force the way an Author can, largely in order to create someone capable of seeing into the future. In some ways, she did succeed, though she absolutely destroyed the Oracle’s mind in the process. 

-The Oracle has lost all sense of self, forgetting her past life entirely and becoming incapable of truly perceiving the present when she isn’t being directly spoken to. As a meager form of coping, the Oracle has dedicated herself entirely to the idea of ‘destiny’, viewing it almost like a god. 

-Seems to view Lydia as a kindred spirit, which freaks Lydia out a bit. It makes her worry that her own powers could end up leaving her in a similar state (though that’s largely because Lydia doesn’t know what exactly led to the Oracle’s powers). 

-There isn’t too much to say about the Oracle, largely thanks to her playing a small role in the story and her lacking much in the way of personal agency for much of it due to her circumstances. 

-Cause of death unknown; assumed to be suicide. 

ALICE’S TEAM OF GUARDS: 

The Serpent

Age: Has been around for about three years. 

Role in the story: Basically set dressing lol

Appearance: A massive snake made of dark grey stone, about twenty feet long, with a human-like hand where the tip of its tail should be that it uses to hold onto the door to Alice’s Garden. It has two curved horns on the top of its head and a mouth full of sharp, stalactite-esque teeth. Its eyes glow different colours based on the feedback it's received; in its neutral state they’re light purple, when a riddle has been answered correctly they glow red (because Alice wanted to fuck with people, basically), and when someone has failed its test they glow bright green. 

Rapid-fire info: -A living security system Alice set up over the door to her manor. At first, the Serpent only tested a creature’s ability to speak before allowing them passage, but Mikayla proceeded to alter the Breaks so a few could mimic human speech, so Alice altered it to tell riddles instead. If you fail three times, you’re eaten alive, and while it does slowly assimilate its victims into the raw meat that makes up its insides, any unfortunate human consumed would die of dehydration due to how long this process takes. Thankfully, Alice can typically figure out if a human’s been eaten within a day or so, and will usually get the Serpent to spit them out. She won’t help with the acid burns, though - that’s not her problem as far as she’s concerned.

-Largely lacks a personality, as it doesn’t require it to do its job. However, it does seem to have some opinions, as it respects Gamma quite a bit as the lead guard and has a mild distaste for the gargoyles’ antics. 

-Will gladly answer questions asked to it (once its riddle is solved, of course), though its answers can be cryptic and lead to even further questions. 

-Is the main reason Alice’s soldiers really don’t like visiting her manor, since it freaks them the hell out (and to be fair, the threat of being eaten alive would do that to most people). 

The Gargoyles (El and Ar) 

Age: About three years old. 

Role in the story: Basically set dressing lol

Appearance: They basically just look like dragon-esque gargoyles, made of the same grey stone as the Serpent, that are about the size of a large dog. Each has gemstones for eyes, with El’s being sapphires and Ar’s being rubies. (Fun fact! These two were inspired by two identical lion statues my grandma has outside of her house, framing her front door, though the irl statues are MUCH smaller than the gargoyles.) 

Rapid-fire info: -Created to guard Alice’s Manor personally once the human soldiers got their own camp, as well as clean up the mess left behind after Break attacks. They have pedestals outside of the Manor’s front door - El sits on the left, Ar sits on the right. 

-Absolutely inseparable, mostly because these two have a single brain cell to share between the both of them and it spends all its time thinking about meat. They have a penchant for speaking in unison and finishing one another's sentences. 

-Both of them have identical, almost manic personalities, and it would be impossible to tell one apart from the other if not for their differing eye colours. 

-They’re basically the Realm’s janitors, eating leftover Break flesh once attacks finish to keep the Realm (and especially the Soldier’s Camp) nice and clean. The humans aren’t big fans of them, due to their winning personalities, and Gamma shares this opinion, largely thanks to the two of them shirking their duties more often than not to go hunting in the woods together. (Alice thinks they’re funny little guys, though.) Fortunately, they’ve been specifically programmed to find the taste of human flesh repulsive. 

-The best way I can describe them is that they have seagull vibes. They’re like if you made a seagull the size of a dog and gave it the ability to speak. 

Diver

Age: Less than a year old

Role in the story: Basically set dressing lol 

Appearance: Its head is a massive, seven-foot-tall brass antique diving helmet, from which three immense tendrils made of some sort of black sludge protrude. It has no sensory organs to speak of, but it seems to be able to navigate just fine, even getting a bit too close to humans it gets curious about as if to get a better look at them. 

Rapid-fire info: -Alice originally created this funky thing as an experiment, then liked it so much she gave it its own fountain in her backyard and made it a guard. 

-Has about the same mental capacity as a toddler, and is prone to doing odd things when it gets curious about something; is known to climb on top of the Manor’s roof and stretching up as tall as it can in order to see outside of the walls surrounding it, which is mostly just seen as a nuisance. 

-It still has the craving for Break flesh, like most of its carnivorous peers. It can absorb any organic material it wants through its sludge, though it seems to be able to choose what it does and does not want to assimilate into itself, as it doesn’t consume things like grass by moving over it. 

-It isn’t allowed outside of the Manor’s walls like the gargoyles are - largely because Gamma fears it might consume a human if given the opportunity and wants to keep a close eye on any interactions it might have with them, just in case - and as such, the other guards need to regularly bring it Break flesh to feed on. (Something the gargoyles like to “forget” to do so they can keep it all for themselves.) 

Blitz

Age: Has existed for a little over eight years

Role in the story: Basically set dressing lol

Appearance: A mis-match of parts from different Earth animals, with the body and fur of an adolescent black lab that hasn’t quite grown into their paws yet, a feline head, a fox’s tail and large ears similar to a lop-eared rabbit’s. The tips of his tail and ears are white, as if they were dipped in white paint. Blitz also has a small clock embedded in his forehead (and maybe on his shoulders and flanks as well, haven’t decided yet), and through the gears you can catch glimpses of his brain. 

Rapid-fire info: -Calling Blitz a ‘guard’ is a bit of a misnomer, but he doesn’t really fit in any other category (aside from Alice’s Inner Circle, but it felt misleading to put him above Cynthia considering his unimportance to the narrative); he’s the first permanent Creation Alice ever made, and he’s around largely to be a companion creature, though he’s really just chilling. 

-Has no tongue (Alice got so caught up making sure the rest of him was perfect that he gained consciousness without one), so he’s easily mistaken to be more animalistic than he is by the humans, but he’s really got the mind of a small child and can communicate telepathically with Alice and all of her Creations with ease. Alice could make him a tongue, and has offered in the past, but Blitz prefers this. 

-Has not aged physically or mentally since his creation because he simply does not want to. Because of this, Gamma treats him like a beloved younger sibling despite Blitz technically being older than him by several months, even reading the little guy bedtime stories regularly. The affection is mutual, as Blitz admires his ‘Big Brother’ a whole lot. (Enough that Blitz uses he/him pronouns purely because Gamma does and Blitz thinks Gamma’s cool.) 

-Blitz is almost as curious about the humans as Gamma is, mostly out of childish wonder at these strange new beasts in his home, but Alice and Gamma won’t let him go outside any further than the Manor’s gardens since he’d be easy Break food. He’s very happy in the rare times that humans do come and visit. 

Some Random Timeline Bullshit:

-Completely desensitized to gore and the like thanks to spending most of his time around Alice ever since he was made, but does get extremely sad when one of the humans or one of the guards die; he doesn’t fully get the concept of death, but he understands it just enough to know that it means he's never gonna see someone again. 

-Quite literally exists to sit around being cute. He’s very good at it!! 

Order of Arrival To The Realm: Cynthia (4.5 years before the main story (BMS)) -> Dylan (4 years BMS) -> Morgan (3.5-4 years BMS) -> Sydney (3 years BMS) -> Trinity (2.5 years BMS) -> Bianca + Troy (6-8 months BMS) -> Lydia + Sinclair (start of main story)

The First Break War happened around four years before the main story, lasting about a year and leading to the deaths of almost a hundred people. The Second Break War happened around a year and a half before the main story, lasting around six to eight months and leading to the deaths of a little over a dozen people.

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

ASL brothers HAIKYUU!! AU!!!!!

Day one of Self Indulgent month for me! I love these three, i love haikyuu, i love killer whales!

(The Naval Academy is this au’s version of marines)

For those who dont know, in Haikyuu (and prob in real life too but in my experience its not as important as they make it in the anime) The "Ace" of the team is the person who primarily scores points via spiking. Theyre the Hard Hitter, basically.

Design talk👇

Originally, i was gonna make their school mascot just "The Pirates" but i couldnt figure out a clever pun with the school name so i scrapped it in favor of an animal mascot. I figured I would have a wider range of puns that way.

I landed on Orcas as the mascot because I think they really embody a pirate way of life. Theyre strong, hang out in groups of a mix of found family and their actual family, hate the rich, and theyre fun loving! And also im a bit biased because theyre my favorite animal, but hey, i said its self indulgent month, didnt I?

Their school name is a play on the word for Killer Whale (Shachi シャチ) and the word for 'knowledge' (Chishiki 知識), i just smashed the two words together. I'm very proud of myself for coming up with that given i dont speak japanese at all.

Anyway, with their designs, I was taking inspiration from orcas to match the design themes of haikyuu. Ace's hair is bleached on the underside to look like the underside of an orca's body, I made ace and sabo's eyes look more whale-like, the clip in sabo's hair is meant to resemble to spots behind orca's eyes, and I tried to make luffy's hair look more like it's round and spiking down more than i usually do.

Ace is wearing a ''way of the ace" shirt in the first picture, Luffy is wearing a shirt that just says "VOLLEY BALL" because i think it would be funny if he wore a bunch of those Zero-context-poorly-translated-random-english-words shirts that theres a bunch of in Asia. Sabo dyes his hair like delinquents do, but it doesnt much look delinquent~y because of how soft it looks. He means to do it to make him look like a delinquent though. Sabo still has his scars in this au, but he uses his hair, arm braces, and leg braces to cover them up. LUFFY AND ACE HAVE FUNKY SOCKS BECAUSE NO ONE CAN TELL THEM (or me) THEY CANT. Sabo wears athletic socks though because he's a debbie downer. He defends himself saying “It’s practical” and Ace and luffy call him “practically a Debbie Downer.”

Luffy is very good at receiving from growing up with Sabo and Ace practicing setting and spiking with eachother and assigning Luffy as Ball Boy. So he got the libero position from that cuz sabo and ace put in a good word for him. Nepotism.

I didn't feel like coming up with designs for them, but Zoro and Bepo are also on their team (theyre in the fifth image sitting on the right of the line of students). Koala and nami are student managers, Robin is the teacher manager, and Franky is the coach. all other straw hats/luffy friends, rev army comrades, and whitebeard brethren are in the stands. Im trying to keep the ages consistent with how they are in canon.

I didnt do a very in depth research, but i couldnt find what Japanese schools have as mascot costumes. and given no one wears any costumes in haikyuu for their team, i can kind of assume they dont use them over there. But unfortunately for them, I'm American. And part of the backbone of our schooling system, is Vaguely Unsettling Mascot Costumes. My sister says my design for it looks like its from Club Penguin, and i find that delightful. [moment of silence for my billions of fallen Puffles, taken from me in The Shutdown] Anyway.

I thought I was clever coming up with the equivalent of the Marines in this au being a Naval Academy. And their mascot being Seals, famously the animal that gets the absolute Worst Of It from orcas. Get shit onnnnn

I believe thats about it, thanks for coming to my ted talk :)

[astonmartinii]

reluctant cupid | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x fem bff!reader

you could set your bestie up with a driver or you could confess your feelings? lando norris is dumb.

based on this request: Could you write something about being best friends with lando and he tries to help set you up with another driver you have a crush on, but then he realises he actually likes you so he has to sabotage all the wingmanning he’s done and you end up together Idk if that makes sense 😭🫶🏼🫶🏼 -@mbappesleftthigh

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 49,340 others

yourusername: someone please save me from the grips of hinge and this oh so lonesome life

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user1: girl knows the whole f1 paddock and looks like that and is still alone there is NO HOPE for me

user2: this post might have thrown me over the edge

landonorris: "i'm so lonely" "why don't you approach that guy" "no too scary"

user3: that's so real though

yourusername: thank you!

landonorris: how do you expect to find a boyfriend when you don't like to talk to anyone and treat hinge like a gameshow

yourusername: i didn't come here for actual advice let me commiserate in peace. god, can women have anything these days?

landonorris: ???

yourusername: oh! idea! pretty please set me up with one of your friends? they have to be great otherwise you wouldn't be friends with them, right? RIGHT?

landonorris: i guess...

yourusername: please lando, i've never asked for anything before

landonorris: i can feel you pouting through the phone

yourusername: so you'll consider ?

landonorris: fine...

user4: bro either gotta admit his feelings now or be condemned to be in the plot of a weird romantic comedy

user5: i personally don't think i can wait until the third act break up with this side character LANDO ACT NOW

oscarpiastri: you'd really trust lando's judgement?

yourusername: he's friends with me, he's got good taste?

oscarpiastri: touche

maxverstappen1: whatever you really wanna say oscar, you gotta keep it in, these idiots will figure it out eventually

yourusername: ???

landonorris: ???

user6: the grid are so done with their asses i can't 😭

user7: but what if the universe doesn't intervene and lando really has just lost the girl forever?

user8: bestie we can't be thinking like this

landonorris

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 812,047 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: being back home means being bothered by her (and whatever is her newest hyperfixation - it's sylvanian families this month if you couldn't tell)

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user9: i am so sorry but they are so in love

user10: it's cute in the movies, but these blind bitches are starting to piss me off

yourusername: THEY CAN HEAR YOU, BE A BETTER DAD

landonorris: they're not my children

yourusername: you take that back right now, you LOVE them

landonorris: you spent my money on them yes

yourusername: that's fatherhood, buddy. buckle up

user11: whoever he sets her up (if he's still dumb enough to do that) is gonna be the biggest third wheel in history

user12: who would willingly sign up for that

user13: me. i would. i have two working eyes and have seen y/n

maxverstappen1: who are these funky little critters and how can i procure some for p?

yourusername: finally a man with sense, literally any grocery store or toy store

maxverstappen1: perf

yourusername: if lando stops being mr. grumpy i'll ask him if i can come to a race and p and i can play animal families

landonorris: i am NOT mr. grumpy

maxverstappen1: you kinda are dude. is it the set-up is it stressing you out?

landonorris: nO

yourusername: then why are you putting it off !!! lando i might die from terminal yearning !!!

landonorris: i have an interested candidate

yourusername: really? do you think they'll actually like me? like this isn't a pity date right?

landonorris: nope!

user14: lando is typing through tears as we speak

user15: if y/n does go on a date with someone from the paddock i actually hope it goes well, as one lonely girl to another, it's tough out here we need one win

f1wagupdates

liked by user18, user19 and 11,043 others

tagged: yourusername & carlossainz55

f1wagupdates: turns out lando is a bit of a cupid as his childhood friend y/n y/ln was spotted out and about with carlos sainz.

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user20: HE ACTUALLY DID IT

user21: that moment when you're so down bad for a girl that you set her up with your best friend

user22: that moment when you're such a wimp you can't admit your feelings and set up the girl you like with a literal GREEK GOD

user23: i am so bamboozled by this move he literally looked like a kicked puppy on his stream bro this is your doing 😭

user24: she's a lover girl she's going to get her heart broken :(

user25: this has mess written all over it

user26: she's literally described herself as a terminal yearner i feel like she'll throw herself in and will get hurt

user27: UNLESS! this is all part of the plan? what if lando set her up with a messy guy like carlos so he can be the shoulder to cry on and that's how he slides in?

user28: that's very convoluted, very rom-com but i'll take it if it means we get lando and y/n together in the end

user29: i know this probably won't last long but can we all appreciate how hot this couple is?

user30: lando and y/n runs rings round y/n and carlos

user31: lol lando is a bad friend for setting her up with CARLOS him and charles are THEE red flags

user32: i hope y/n is prepared

user33: also lando hasn't thought it fully out if his plan is to be the shoulder to cry on because he's just opening her up to be called a homie hopper or a paddock bunny

carlossainz55

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 702,554 others

carlossainz55: productive weekend with my girl

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user34: well that's not y/n

user35: that finished faster than i expected

user36: lando DO NOT quit your day job

landonorris: call me bro

carlossainz55: si, cabron

user37: i don't think they'll be cabrons after this call

user38: maybe this is all just going to plan?

user39: yall gotta give up this conspiracy theory maybe these people are just as dumb and mean as they seem to be

user40: soooooo... what did we all do this weeekend?

user41: i broke a girl's heart @carlossainz55 twins 👯‍♂️

user42: AHHHH???

maxverstappen1: oh that's not-

yourusername: you're so chronically online :(

maxverstappen1: you're alive?

yourusername: yes. coming at you live from the bed i'm currently rotting in

maxverstappen1: not going to say i didn't warn you?

carlossainz55: really? in my own comment section?

yourusername: one second, we're having a conversation here

maxverstappen1: yeah carlos, gosh.

carlossainz55: i'm so confused

user43: okay power move to just start a conversation in his comments?

user44: the power of confusion is simply unmatched

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 56,309 others

yourusername: certified boy hater

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user45: a ferrari boy will do that to you

landonorris: feeling hashtag victimised rn

yourusername: obviously doesn't include you girlypop. but you seriously need to reevaluate your judgement

landonorris: carlos is attractive?

yourusername: he ghosted me?

carlossainz55: i am right here

yourusername: blocked.

landonorris: did you actually just block him?

yourusername: yes 😀 !

landonorris: god this is a nightmare

yourusername: not if you'd take a GOD DAMN HINT

landonorris: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

user46: yall this is a public instagram comment section

user47: don't say that, this is their argument in the rain moment

user48: lemme grab the popcorn 🍿

maxverstappen1: this better not include the real number one girlypop here

yourusername: of course not pookie

oscarpiastri: you gonna continue the lil spat above this?

yourusername: no?

oscarpiastri: well some people (max and i) would like to listen so please continue

yourusername: no, i don't think i will

oscarpiastri: GOD YOU PEOPLE ARE INSUFFERABLE

maxverstappen1: what oscar said

user49: oscar and max are so real

user50: they can't leave us on this cliff hanger

landonorris

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 1,043,788 others

landonorris: some snaps from '23

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user51: have we just been thirst trapped?

user52: i don't think it was intended for us

user53: this has "i am hotter than carlos sainz" written all over it

yourusername: posting tits on main, brave.

landonorris: i came second in singapore.

yourusername: sureeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. modesty, ever heard of it lan?

landonorris: slutshaming isn't cute y/n

yourusername: you kinda have to pull to be a slut lan. you are under qualified for the position

landonorris: if you keep being mean to me i will call your mum or my mum.

yourusername: try it. i see cisca more than you, i have faith in her

landonorris: the line is busy. are you on the phone to MY mum right now?

yourusername: maybe.

user54: we're so close to them getting their heads out of their asses

user55: don't get my hopes up

danielricciardo: i hope this works lol

landonorris: you don't think i'm sexy?

danielricciardo: it doesn't matter what i think

landonorris: i'm not sexy :(

danielricciardo: you're baiting me but yes, you are sexy.

user56: i'll fight anyone who made this man believe he's not beautiful

liked by yourusername

user57: I SAW THAT 📸

user58: someone just lock them in a cupboard at this point

oscarpiastri: noted.

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 89,034 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: yeah, yeah. you can stop yelling at us now.

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user61: LET'S FUCKING GO

user62: it was worth all that yelling. i expect an invite to the wedding now.

user63: wedding? girly they only just realised their feelings after a DECADE

maxverstappen1: it was about fucking time

yourusername: okay miss ma'am. some people are EMOTIONALLY VULNERABLE AND NOT VERY GOOD AT PROCESSING THEM

maxverstappen1: you must've been emotionally constipated because this was painful

yourusername: it was painful for me too

maxverstappen1: so painful that you dated CARLOS

yourusername: one date! ONE!

maxverstappen1: carlos said can you unblock him so he can be mean to me?

yourusername: fine.

carlossainz55: STOP MAKING ME LOOK LIKE A BAD PERSON. YES I AM NOT THE BEST AT RELATIONSHIPS BUT LEAVE ME BE

maxverstappen1: lol

yourusername: lol

user64: unblocking carlos to hit him with the lol max and y/n might be more iconic than lando and y/n

landonorris: not on our relationship announcement post 🤨

user65: OOP.

landonorris: i love you doofus

yourusername: i love you too muppet

landonorris: how much was the betting pool for your family?

yourusername: it got to over £300

landonorris: ours was £750

yourusername: are we dumb?

landonorris: no!

oscarpiastri: two dumbass girls saying 'yass' to each other

yourusername: LEAVE US BE

landonorris: oscar :(

user66: not their own families betting on when they'd get together 😭

landonorris

liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 1,430,778 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: first win, hopefully not my only one.

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user67: MY BABIES

user68: i feel like i've been on this journey with them

oscarpiastri: thank god you guys got your shit together, i was THIS close to jumping out the nearest window if i had to watch lando mope around like a kicked puppy when y/n had the lil thing with carlos

user69: so it wasn't some grand plan?

oscarpiastri: no he's just dumb enough to actually set up his first love with his best friend

landonorris: OSCAR!

oscarpiastri: am i wrong?

landonorris: no... but! i got there in the end

oscarpiastri: good thing you're faster on track

user70: the grid being just as done with them as us is killing me

maxfewtrell: finally this unnecessarily long and overly convoluted saga has come to and end, lets never do this again!

landonorris: i'm locked in for life bro no worries

yourusername: awwwwwwwwwwwwww i love you too bubs

maxfewtrell: stop being sappy under my comment

yourusername: you just complained we didn't sort out our shit fast enough and now we're too sappy?

landonorris: STICK TO A STORY BOZO

maxfewtrell: now you're even more ride or die... can we go back?

yourusername: nope!

landonorris: nope!

maxverstappen1: i for one am very happy for you both

yourusername: thank you max !!

landonorris: not so fast, he had the biggest bet on us in the paddock

yourusername: get that bag sis

landonorris: ???

yourusername: we can't fight it anymore, let them have their jokes, we actually have each other now :)

landonorris: yes we do :) xx

user71: golly gosh this is so fucking cute

fin.

note: i hope this is what you were looking for and that you all enjoyed!! i'm just waiting on my tester sticker sheets for my small business @badlydrawnf1cats on here and on instagram, if you wanna give it a follow x tHANK YOU FOR READING MY LOVES X

[powdermelonkeg]

You're big on Zelda, so I'm curious. How would you rewrite TOTK, if given the writer's room?

Fun question! *cracks knuckles* Let's answer it.

I've answered about the disconnect between BotW and TotK before, so I'm going to take some of those ideas and run with them here.

I'm taking the intended route, for the sake of keeping coherence rather than just making up an entirely new Hyrule from scratch. Link and Zelda are the same as they are in BotW.

To start off, I like the Zonai.

I like that they're an entirely new race of people in Hyrule. I love how weird-looking they are. I love that they're not human race #87.

I also love their bastard not-Zonai lovechild thing. If we saw more examples of Zonai, I would love for this funky lil dude to be part of them, kind of like how the Zora have a ton of variation between them.

So why don't we do that? Why don't we give them a kingdom?

And why don't we put some meat on the bones of what was already built?

There are Zonai-esque ruins all over the Depths, mostly in mines for Zonaite.

Their color palette matches. Rauru's braids and Sonia's earrings match brightblooms.

And the three dragons, who have Zonai features (segmented, color-edged hair, long ears, blunt muzzles, scale beard mouths), could have been a catalyst.

A catalyst for what, though?

It starts with the Depths themselves, and the dragons breaking free.

See, in TotK, the three elemental dragons all dive in and out of the Depths chasms. There's no explanation as to why, and the only explanation we have for the chasms forming is that it was like...geysers of Gloom.

However, the dragons in BotW are confirmed to have carved these canyons:

So let's go back in time a little.

The Zonai live in the Depths. They're underground, away from all the chaos that Hyrule has ever had to endure. They worship the bargainer statues as gods, they collect the souls of those above that drip down into the world below.

They have a rich mining industry, and coliseums for their greatest warriors to test their mettle against captured monsters.

They have their Secret Stones, and the one who's allowed to hang onto those is their leader.

That'd be young Prince Rauru.

The elemental dragons, Dinraal, Naydra, and Farosh, are testaments to why no one can be allowed to have the Secret Stones. They were consumed by their power, literally.

One day, they break free, as if summoned by an unknown force. They tunnel through the ground and into the sky, connecting the world below to the one above.

The Hylians cautiously venture below, or the Zonai above. Prince Rauru, keeper of the Secret Stones, and Sonia, High Priestess of Hylia, meet.

They fall in love.

They marry.

Their marriage marks a unity between the Surface and the Depths.

(Maybe throw in a lil Skyward Sword continuity, mention that while Hylia sent the humans to the sky, the Zonai fled underground to avoid Demise, to keep the Secret Stones out of his grasp. You don't even have to name drop him, just say they went down to avoid destruction.)

Suddenly, Hyrule (the center part of the map, based around the Great Plateau, not the whole sub-kingdom conglomerate it exists as in BotW) undergoes a technological boom. Ganondorf, neighboring leader of the Gerudo, is interested. He talks trade with now-king Rauru, but there's the sub-plot of trying to get his secrets, which he steadily grows obsessed with.

Meanwhile, the Gerudo make their own expedition into the Depths.

There. The stage is set.

Now Zelda falls into the past.

She's found by Rauru and Sonia. Adopted as their daughter, more or less.

Also, the two of them have a small child. Nintendo, you CAN'T set them up as "they're her ancestors" and then kill them childless, descendants don't work like that. Zelda's immediately endeared to the kid, who reminds her of Link. Lil half-Zonai girl with a wooden sword who swings it at anything that moves. There are memories, it's cute.

In the past, Zelda witnesses, real time, Ganondorf going mad with power. They get along well at first, he's cordial, polite, a model diplomat. But she finds his troops in places they shouldn't be, confronts him about it and gets brushed off.

She tells Rauru, he's unwilling to throw suspicion onto Ganondorf. They're semi-friends and diplomacy is important! He's got to run this kingdom right. He can't fail, this is the biggest thing he's ever done!

(Sprinkle in a parallel to BotW Zel's fear of failure)

Some of the memories fill in gaps about Rauru's power, also. He's got what Link can do, minus Recall. Ultrahand and Fuse mainly, but Rauru's been experimenting with Ascend, excited because it'll make passage between the Depths and the Surface so much easier, and we see where Zel gets her scientific excitement from. Regardless of how different they look, they ARE family.

Ganondorf and Rauru get into a fight one day. A BAD fight. Maybe because Zelda tipped Rauru off, and despite telling her no, Rauru looked into it anyways. Regardless, they march out in opposite directions, and Zelda overheard it in the hallway. As Ganondorf leaves, he gives her the most SCATHING glare.

He then declares war on Hyrule.

Rauru makes a bid for allies, trying to get enough manpower to fight Ganondorf's impressive military. It's a struggle at first, but Zelda steps in, being the leader she's skilled at being and telling the others how crucial it is that they help. Ganondorf, meanwhile, turns to forbidden arts in his rage against Rauru, gets infected by Gloom/Malice, becomes scarily powerful. First Blood Moon. The Gerudo are kind of unnerved by him.

We see Zelda and Sonia helping with the war. Sonia's got light powers, Zelda's are stronger, together they can destroy entire ARMIES of monsters, saving their warriors on the battlefield. A few instances of Little Princess trying to be involved like the grown-ups are, getting huffy when she's told no.

In the aftermath of each fight, Rauru runs around, sealing away the monsters' latent energy with green spirals. That's where the Shrines come from, though in the past, they're Luminous Stones—it's all faded by present day, the light bled out of them.

Sonia is on the battlefield against Ganondorf one fateful night, Little Princess wanders onto the field, both the girls panic about it, and Sonia tries to run away with her while Zelda affords them cover. THAT'S when Ganondorf strikes her—he's fast like a ninja, rushes past Zelda, strikes Sonia.

She falls. Little Princess tumbles.

Zelda races to Little Princess's side, picks her up to run away with her as Ganondorf gets Sonia's stone, and he transforms into the Demon King. He raises his army. Little Princess screams, and we see an uncontrolled blast of Hylia's power, like an erratic attempt at what Zelda did at the end of BotW.

It fritzes, Zelda hugs her tight and ducks down to shield her, and the power cascades across the battlefield, affecting monsters AND people alike. The war is in shambles. Ganondorf stares at the child and her guardian, and retreats in a hurry.

Cue Rauru running to their side.

He grieves his wife. Little Princess is kept safe by Zelda. The Gerudo shun Ganondorf and join Rauru's side, and everyone involved in the war dedicates everything to one final assault against Ganondorf, one trap to finally END him, to force him into the Depths and fight him on the Zonai's own turf. The Secret Stones are distributed. Rauru knows what he has to do, and at the climax of the final battle, he uses his Secret Stone to amplify his sealing magic, knowing it'll kill him in the process and locking Ganondorf away in the Depths.

Except, it's not that simple.

Gloom bursts out of the newly trapped Ganondorf's chest, flooding the Depths, eliminating everyone in its path. That includes the Sages, the assaulting army, and the VAST majority of the Zonai. Its sole purpose is to gather enough strength over time for Ganondorf to break his shackles, because the Gloom wants OUT.

(Subtly implied that the Gloom is the first iteration of Demise's curse of hatred, maybe.)

And Zelda is alone. Trapped in the past, stuck with Little Princess, her Secret Stone, and the last of Mineru's notes.

Gloom continues to fume out of the Depths, so they're sealed off. The Blood Moon keeps spawning new monsters, so Little Princess and the remainders of the construct caretakers are sent up to the sky, for her protection. Zelda's the one that orchestrates it. Her people once hailed from the sky, and it's always been known as a place of safety for them.

Is this self-referential to the history she's building, or a Skyward Sword reference? Who knows.

They go skyward.

Then the Master Sword appears, and Zelda knows what she has to do. It's compounded, of course, by crushing guilt over the fact that Sonia's death happened on her watch. She tells Little Princess to look out for the world ahead, tells her to be strong, and brave, and everything she wishes her dad had told her. Then ends it with a final message.

"I'm leaving you something very important. Take good care of it."

Then she goes off alone to become a dragon.

Present day.

Link's not guided by Rauru, he's guided by a strange, beautiful woman who looks kind of like Zelda (albeit with Zonai hair, eyes, and long claws), who has a deep regret for the world below and who knows the lonely world above like the back of her hand. She teaches him the basics of his powers as he visits the shrines.

The Great Sky Island is otherwise normal.

You go to Hyrule. The Light Dragon's the one that breaks the cloud barrier, and as she does so, she sheds a single tear. By the time you get to the tear's location, it's spread a mural of the memory it contains around it.

Whenever you Recall a tear, the Light Dragon sheds a new one somewhere else, and it's up to you to follow.

You're chasing Zelda, twice over.

Besides that, Hyrule's Surface is...largely unchanged. I'm still upset that the pirates assaulting Lurelin weren't ACTUAL pirates, so guess what, they are now. Splinter faction of Yiga. Also, River Zora take over Lake Hylia, there's a spat between them and the Sea Zora, and Yona is the princess of the Rivers.

Then you've got the Depths.

That's where you find the ruins of the Zonai civilization, and you start piecing together the world it contains on your own. You aren't told, you're SHOWN.

Rauru's ghost finds and guides you here. He has a moment of "hey, isn't that MY arm?", upgrades your abilities or shows you how to use them more efficiently (ups your build limit, shows you how to un-Fuse, teaches you DEscend, gives you Autobuild, things like that), then DIES-dies. You escort his poe soul to a Bargainer statue.

The biggest change to the Depths, though, is that under the Gerudo Desert, you find PEOPLE.

So remember how the Gerudo launched their own expedition into the Depths in the past? How the Gloom killed almost everyone and the world below was sealed off?

There were a sparse few survivors of the Zonai, and some unfortunate Gerudo researchers that also got trapped. The people down there now are descendants of both. They're not Zonai anymore, though.

They're Lomei. They evolved like how the Rito evolved from the Zora in Wind Waker. Their tribe name comes from the Zonai word for "loneliness."

Regardless, they're initially inhospitable to Surfacers, because Surfacers are how they ended up how they did. If you sneak into their city, you're captured, like a few unfortunate Zonai Survey Team members that have wandered in, only YOU can escape via Ascend. OoT Gerudo parallel.

You can earn the Lomei's trust by doing things for them (maybe beating all three labyrinths as a rite of passage?), and then they let you into their cities. They've got their own brand of tech based off of old Zonai designs. One of the Lomei scientists is working on a mechsuit—that'll be the sage that Mineru passes her stone down to. And it fits doubly, both because the Lomei ARE the descendants of the Zonai and because the Lomei technician and Mineru are both scientists.

The Lomei people give you more pieces to the complicated Zonai-Hylian puzzle, and they're the ones that first tell you the legend of the dragons-from-Secret-Stones. So you can either learn it from them OR get it revealed in Zel's later memories.

Besides that, the present plot is pretty much as normal. Still the same bosses. Still the same sages-help-with-everything, though each sage you rescue gives you another piece of what really happened at the final fight (rather than the same cutscene over and over), telling you about how Rauru sacrificed himself and the effect it had on the rest of the Depths.

I will change where the Ganondorf's Army fight takes place, though. It's ACTUALLY very hidden, like the game was trying to imply it to be when you chase around Kohga. You do still have to do that, but he accidentally directs you to a place that's hidden in the tiniest crevice near Hyrule Castle, one that's very easy to miss and sitting in a veritable sea of Gloom. Once you finish the Kohga quest, a poe hovers outside of the crevice, which leads into an even deeper chasm that leads to the Underdepths.

The poe's your help to get through the maze there, and wherever it goes, Sundelions bloom at the corners. If you go early, before getting everything done, you have to navigate that place yourself, and it's a nightmare.

But you do it. You get to where everything started, and you beat the army, then Ganondorf, then he shoves his fist down his throat and goes dragon.

As he breaks through the ground and curls around Hyrule Castle, he SHATTERS it. The building crumbles to smithereens, crashing into the Depths below.

You beat Demon Dragon, Zelda catches you on her nose, it's over. You're in the spirit realm over sleeping Zelda.

The poe appears over your shoulder, drifts away from you, then materializes into Sonia. She says nothing, just activates Recall, turns Zelda back to normal, then cradles her in her arms. She gives her a kiss on the forehead, looks at you, then says the same line Zelda said to Little Princess ages ago, with the single change of one word.

"I'm leaving you something very important. Take good care of her."

She fades, as does the Spirit World.

You're falling.

Zelda's falling.

You catch her.

She wakes up, sees you, then hugs you and sobs into your shoulder.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom.

Roll credits.

Bonus for the memory completionists, the True Ending has Zelda meeting the grown Little Princess up at the Great Sky Island, reconciling with her, both of them saying how proud they are of each other. Then Little Princess turns into a poe, and Zelda promises to take her to the Depths so she can be with her parents again. As they walk away, Sonia's poe tails after them.

And THAT is a way longer post than I expected to write. Whew.

[smokescreenimusprime]

not my usual but it was too perfect to pass up and the idea was NOT leaving my head. Decided to write a snippet for @keferon's IMMACULATE Mecha Pilot Jazz AU, though apologies if the charactization is a lil funky, this is my first time writing either of these characters and double apologies for the undoubted slew of grammar and spelling errors

but that aside, I hope you enjoy :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Is It Self Sacrifice If It's Not Really You?

Despite the cacophany of the battlefield, Prowl's scream cut through it with with the ease of a freshly sharped blade through flesh and found it's home nestled into Jazz's ears.

He barely had a second to look up, hardly more than a glance, but it was all he needed to make out familiar white and black.

A Quintesson, one of the smaller but more freaky looking ones, was looming over his collapsed frame. He was pinned, his back to solid rocky walls and the Quint at his front, jamming it's tentacles into every crack of his armour they could.

He was putting up one hell of a fight, but something was wrong.

"PROWL!" he shouted, shifting his weight in preperation to bolt. "HOLD ON, I'M COMMIN-"

But the screech of the Quintesson he was currently grappling with forcefully stole his attention back, barely any warning given before it's gaping maw latched onto his mech's forearm.

It pulled, joints and plates creaking with the strain but still holding strong. It shook it's head and Jazz brought a hand up to brace against the outside of the monster, if only to stop the arm from being completely ripped out of the socket. He landed a few solid kick as it lifted him off the ground, but it's movements were still largey effortless, like his frame weighed as much as a tin can.

Prowl screamed again. This time it was louder.

Against all common (sane) sense, Jazz looked away from his enemy and toward Prowl

Some of his external plating was damaged, gouges in messy circle patterns with rivulets of blue energon sluggishly bleeding out. He seemed to be smoking too, thin curls of smoke wafting off his cables. His eyes were flickering wildly, something Jazz had grown to associate with too much damage and too little power.

All of the damage paled in comparison to where Jazz's focus was.

Now, Jazz didn't know how these guys had their mechs built, but they could hold up to some serious punishment. Their engineers seemed to keep an even more meticulous eye on any damage, and Prowler and the other's all had frames clealy meant to last.

But they were all still vulnerable at their cores.

And the Quintesson's tentacles, sparking with a terrifying yellow and red electricity, were pulling and prying right at the plating above that core.

It was starting to show some give too, a testimate to the true strength of the offending monster. Chest plating, no matter the make, didn't come off easily, intent to protect the most vulnerable parts of a pilot.

The electricity was already frying his frame, if it got a straight shot of that to his chest-

Jazz needed to do something.

Jazz needed to do something.

But what, what could he do, whatever it was it needed to be quick, he didn't have time to finish off this Quintesson, there wasn't time for finesse, he just needed to go to help to F I G H T -

Jazz readjusted the braced positioning of his legs, thanking for what was probably the thousandth time the engineers who'd made the adjustment to give him more flexibility and agility, and brought his free arm high above his head.

And brought it down.

His trapped arm creaked, the plating denting and squealing as the metal controted, sparks going flying and red error messages flashing in his vision.

He did it again.

And again.

And again.

He made sure to keep his blows aimed at preciscely where he knew it was weakest and made sure to push with his legs as hard as he could, swaying side to side and focing the joint to bend in ways it had never been meant to. His movements became a dance to the orchestra of cables snapping and metal ripping and electricity cracking and his arm b r e a k i n g , the dance growing faster and more determined the louder the music played.

It felt like eternity, and the phantom sensation was disorienting. There was no pain, only uncomfortable pressure that built up and up and up, perfectly in time with the warning messages he forcefully dismissed. It was far from pleasant, but it was nothing compared to the cold burning terrified angry fight flight save him running full blast in his brain.

And with one final crack akin to lightning, he was free.

It was the furthest thing from a clean break, and to his mild surprise it didn't break at the elbow but rather a bit above it. In the second of freefall he had, he couldn't help but admire the shredded stump and mourn how he knew Ratchet was going to have his head for all the extra work.

He hit the ground in a roll and popped up running, stumbling and nearly falling face first into alien dirt at the sudden uneven weight distribution but he simply let his partial fall carry him forward until he was sprinting full speed.

With his remaining hand he grabbed the Quintesson and pulled, not letting go until it wasn't tearing into Prowl's front and instead embedded several feet in the ground. He dashed, not giving it even a moment, standing tall in front of Prowl.

The Quint got back up, enraged screeches and chitters coming out of it's mouth.

"Back off," Jazz growled back.

The Quintesson attacked, and everything became the hyperaware blur combat always became.

Dodge, dodge, punch, dodge, kick, kick, punch, dodge, jump, kick jump-

One of it's tentacles latched right onto the open stump and set a wave of electricity in.

His mech's vision went bright white, sparks exploding out even inside his cockpit and the smell of burning metal filling his nose. All the protective insulation was made useless from the direct route into the mech's systems.

Jazz jerked his arm stump back and headbutted it.

He got a tentacle to the face for his troubles, grabbers squeezing and cracking the visor. He planted his feet, one on solid ground the other on the slack of the tentacle, and pulled as hard as he could.

A decent chunk of the face came left it, not deep enough to affect any systems or his vision anymore than it was already damaged, but enough that it certainly wasn't pretty.

He kept more distance after that. Wouldn't do any good for him or Prowler if he got fried too. But the Quintesson was desperate, like a cornered animal, grabbing and clawing at anything it could gets it's tentacles on. The same gouges Prowl had began to litter his own armour as it kept making grabs, and the beastie even managing to get a few more much briefer electrical surges in.

It was obvious only one of them was going to walk away from this fight, and Jazz was not going to let it be the Quint. Prowl would kill him if he did

Finally he managed to get in a lucky shot, albeit at the cost of his feet. The Quintesson tried to get in a bite like it friend had, only to be met with the full force of Jazz's feet pressing them apart.

The teeth and other horrors might've torn through his feet but dammit if it wasn't satisfying to hear the crack as its jaw snapped and the body went limp.

The battle was still going on around them, but it was starting to wind down. A trio of bots had even started attacking the one Jazz had left behind.

The immediate area was clear, and there were more than enough bots he could shout out to for backup if he needed it.

"Prowler, you okay?" he said, though he noticed his voice had a bit of static lacing it. Maybe getting his face ripped off did more damage than he thought, or it could be lingering damage from the electricity. "Sorry it took me so long to come getcha, talk, dark and bitey kept me a bit occupied."

He wiggled his stump with a chuckle, leaning in closer. Kneeling down was difficult with the leaking hydraulic fluid and Quintesson salivia making it hard to get a solid grip, but with the current state of his visor he didn't want to risk missing anything on Prowl. To his relief, despite the extensive denting and electrical burns, Prowl's chest was thankfully uncompromised. Hopefully his mech was insulated

The electricity seemed to have done a number on his connection to the head though, the eyes were still glitching wildly and his normally expressive face seemed stuck.

"J-Jazz..." Prowl stuttered, and Jazz found himself frowning. Maybe Prowl got a bit more banged up on the inside than he thought. "You- your-"

His eyes were flickering wildly about Jazz's mech, and he could practically hear his friend's battle computer crunching away.

"Ah, don't worry bout that," he rapping his mech's chest with a fist. "This old frame's gone through worse. Nothing delicate got smashed, and I've barely got a scratch on me. Ratchet'll have me right as rain before you know it, so don't worry your pretty little head one bit."

"Speaking of, I'm gonna go find 'im," he stood back up, looking around the battlefield. "The fight's pretty much over, and I'm not sure if it's a great idea for you to be moving after all that zappy nonsense. Just sit tight and-"

"No!"

Jazz startled a bit at the sudden shout, looking back down at Prowl. The other man's mech suddenly lunged up, sitting straight and looking at him with wide eyes.

"Prowler? Is somethin wrong?"

"I will contact Ratchet," he says in a rush. "A comm message will be more efficient than searching on foot, not to mention I'll be able to tell him what to prepare for,"

Jazz raised a brow.

"Go right ahead, Prowl," he chirped despite his suspicion. He was fairly certain Prowl was hiding something from him, but prying would just make him clamp down tighter.

Prowl didn't seem like the sort to hide things from medics but...

He sat his mech down and leaned back against the wall. "You don't mind if I wait with ya, do you?"

Just to be safe.

Despite his initial assumptions, Prowl actually seemed to relax at his suggestion.

"Not at all."

[dolene]

ESPRESSO ; max verstappen x singer!reader

summary: after the release and her performance on coachella. who knows that her newest single is hinting an attraction from a certain person.

taglist: @callsignwidow (and for those who commented in my previous deleted post, please re-comment)

yourusername

liked by ameliadimz and 1,936,558 others

yourusername just wanted to put out a little song before Coachella 🤎

Espresso 4/11

8pm EST

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maxverstappen1 added a photo to their story! · 12m

yourusername

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view all 8,461 comments

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[gumycandyyy]

୨♡ Ｗｉｎｔｅｒ Ｋｉｎｇ ＨＣＳ ♡୧

I am ashamed of tumblr for not making more fanfic of this funky fruit.

We got some general HCS and then some romantic ones under the cut! (I went a little overboard with the romantic ones, hehe!)

Gender-neutral

୨♡ Ｇｅｎｅｒａｌ ♡୧

-Man's self care routine is off the charts

-I'm serious, he has like- 80 different bubble bath concoctions.

-Smells like mint

-or some kind of cold scent.

-I feel like he loves dressing up fancy, so he has a closet full of sparkly suits

-maybe even some dresses if he's feeling special.

-Doesn't actually need to wear glasses, he just likes how they look.

-While he loves his winter wonder world, I feel like he'd enjoy rainy weather more than snow.

-He got rid of all his madness and sadness, yes, but I think he'd cry at something especially cute. Happy tears, y'know?

"Why are you crying, sir? Are you okay?" "Oh, it's nothing. *sniff* Just those two rabbits that are cuddling."

-He is really bad at any percussion instrument

-like.. REALLY bad.

-His hands are too delicate for such a garish instrument as the drums!

-He loves playing duets on the piano, but rarely has anyone to play with.

-I mean, he could always concoct up an ice creature to play piano with him, but that's honestly quite dull.

-His favorite movie would probably be an old Christmas movie, like It's a Wonderful Life.

-He gets kidnapped by the Candy Queen so often, that occasionally he brings a book or something snuggly to help him wait for his ice scouts to rescue him.

-He once got so bored while kidnapped that he tried to read to some of the mutilated candy people

-That was the last time he saw his favorite book.

-Safe to say he doesn't bring his favorites anymore.

୨♡ Ｒｏｍａｎｔｉｃ ♡୧

-Will literally spoil his love interest rotten.

-You want that thing you saw earlier?

-Consider it yours

-You'd like for it to snow outside?

-A sprinkle or a blizzard?

-Literally anything, this man will go to the ends of the universe to get you what you'd like.

-Love languages are definitely gift giving and physical touch

-probably acts of service too.

-Loves dancing.

-Loves dancing.

-Whether it be a slow dance or ice-skating, he will take every opportunity to dance with you!

-He adores short people.

-Good, because he's tall as a giant.

-if you're shorter than him, he will no doubt use you as an armrest.

-He always makes remarks on how cute you are.

-Even if you're only two inches shorter than him.

-If you're taller...

-hoo boy.

-Expect him to be all over you.

-figuratively and literally.

-Will want you to carry him everywhere, sit in your lap, rest against you, whatever.

-Just let him touch you.

-He'll talk about how strong you are, how you'd be the perfect chair, etc. etc.

-He does the stupid "How's the weather up there?" jokes.

-Loves your body, no matter what it looks like.

-You're skinny?

-You're easy to carry around and dance with.

-You're chubby or fat?

-Literally will always be holding onto or resting on part of you. He loves squishy people.

-Somewhere in the middle?

-He could not care less. He loves you regardless of what you look like.

-And he makes sure to emphasize his point by complimenting you endlessly.

-He will never leave your side.

-Even if you need space, he doesn't.

-So why wouldn't you?

-Back to our regularly scheduled fluff-

-Candy Queen hates your guts.

-She thinks you're an obstacle, keeping her from the Winter King.

-No doubt tries to kill you.

-Multiple times. a day

-Her plans are always foiled, but if she gets too close to genuinely hurting you, Winter will be so upset.

"Oh, Dearest, please tell me you're okay!" "You are?" "Phew. I don't know what I'd do if you were hurt in any way."

-His petnames for you are probably

-Darling,

-Dearest,

-My love,

-There are a lot more, but those are the main ones.

-LOVES kissing you.

-Anytime, any way.

-He finds it adorable when his nose bumps your face.

-Favorite place to kiss would probably be the back of your hand.

-He is a gentleman after all.

-Overall, he just adores you.

-And he sincerely hopes you love him just as much as he does you.

Headcanon requests are open for Winter King! Don't be afraid to send an ask, and be shameless! I know I am! (No smut tho. Some spice is okay, however.)

Have some free WK art for coming this far!

reblog for a beginner writer?

[j0hnpr1c3sm1ssus]

Hi I love your writing and saw your request for ideas and such and had 2, one where John price is desperate to taste his lady’s cunt, just on his hands and knees for it. And him just talking to her cunt, not her, just her pussy🫣

Qgsuahdhsjdhd brain rotting rn from this anon

Warnings: smut. This is just smut.

AN: Am sick so if the ending is a little funky it's because I'm lethargic<3

"C'mon, lovie.." he mumbles, eyes on the wrong lips. John's hand strokes the inside of your thigh, "Open up.. take off the panties..."

You're just staring down at him, incredulous. He's staring directly at your cunt, the only thing keeping it from being exposed and dined upon is a thin pair of satin panties.

"Won't even make you all overwhelmed, hm? Just let me taste.." he trails off, glancing up at your face, praying for you to declothe 'her.'

You oblige, reaching a hand down, and as soon as that sweet, sweet mess between your legs is revealed John is *all over it.*

I mean his meaty paws grab at your thighs, holding them spread as his face dives into your pussy, licking and sucking and slurping in the most grotesque manner he can. Your hand finds his hair, clenching down on it, holding him down to your pretty little slit. He pulls back and you let go, his breath is hot and moist against your skin, "Fuckin' good cunnie, huh? All fo'me..?" He asks in that low tone before going right back to that cunt, licking fat stripes of your slick up. Your legs wrap around his head, clenching onto him and holding him there and grinding down on his face.

You let out this mewling gasp, and you cum on his face, it coats his beard and slickens his face, only adding to the lewdness.

And this man leaves nothing in your cunt. He licks and sucks and kisses it all up, all while you're trying not to cum again from the sheer dirtiness of it all.

Your legs end up forcefully pried off of his head so he can look up at you, giving your clit one last gentle kiss before looking up to your severely neglected lips.

You have tears pricked in your eyes, your face flush, your lips slightly parted. He takes his water bottle from the bedside table--this man always has one *just* incase he needs to clean up after indulging in you a little *too* much--then takes a sip, finishing nearly a third of the bottle. He swishes the water in his mouth, then puts the bottle to your lips.

"So fuckin' good, lovie. Always is," he mumbles out, tipping the bottle so you can drink some water. One of your clammy hands comes off from clenching the bed to take the bottle, taking however much water you want.

He reaches up to stroke your hair, "pretty woman, with a pretty little cunt, hm? Did you have fun?"

You nod, grinning all bashfully as you hand the water bottle back. He has that look to him, all proud and satisfied, the corners of his eyes crinkling and giving a delicious grin.

He takes a hand and wipes his beard down, wiping it off on his pants' leg. He lays down beside you as you slide your panties back into their original positioning, wrapping one of his arms around you pulling you close.

"Love ya, birdie," he grumbles out against your neck, closing his eyes and relaxing against you.

"Love you, too, John.." you mumble, shutting your eyes.

[berberriescorner]

"Balancing Acts"

Characters: Rio x Black!Reader.

Summary: Rio takes an important phone call while dealing with Beth and her minions.

Warnings: Profanity, Mentions of violence, Mild sexual innuendos, slight referencing to intimacy, implied threats, and Rio’s nonchalant view of violence.

Word Count: 1,200+.

Silence filled the room as tension wafted through a pristine kitchen. Rio posted up against the spotless island. Nerves had a funny way of forcing oneself to stress clean. His eyes bounced to the others occupying the space.

“Y’all ain't got shit to say?”

Beth and Ruby’s shoulders jumped as Annie started to stammer, “L-look I totally understand that we have an arrangement-.”

“Oh, you understand, yeah? If that were the case. I’d have my bread and we wouldn’t have this pointless conversation.”

“We—just need a little more time. There have been a few mishaps-.”

“I ain't come here for excuses. Figure the shit out. You got forty-eight hours. Get to it,” Rio barked.

His phone chirped and the three women gawked at how quickly he could turn the anger off. They watched as he answered the call.

“What's up darlin’? Yeah? Hold up, let me switch to video. Put little mamas on the phone.”

Rio's fingers moved quickly across his screen. The tiny, bashful voice flowed through the speaker on his phone making the usually emotionless man smile brightly. It quickly shifted to a frown once the little voice started to sniffle.

Your voice cooed from behind your daughter. You brushed her hair behind her ear, holding her tight, and kissing her head. You rocked her side to side, “Go ahead, baby, tell your Daddy what happened at school today.”

“Who made my baby girl cry?”

“D-daddy he said I was chubby,” she responded, lip quivering.

Rio’s eyes connected with yours. You frowned, “Some little a—boy said her cheeks were chubby and pinched them hard. She told him to stop. He followed that up with a hair pull, cackling his funky breath in her face. Miss Mamas cocked back and punched him in the face. The teacher only caught that part. She tried to explain, but the little b—terror lied. To keep things fair they both had to sit out at recess today.”

“Is that right? Look at me, my baby. You know you're beautiful, right?”

Your daughter sniffled, wiping away the remnants of her tears, and nodded.

“Y-yes, sir.”

“Then that's the only thing that matters. Okay? Daddy thinks you're beautiful. Would I lie to my baby girl?”

“No, sir,” she replied, as a small smile spread across her face.

“Fu—forget what that teacher said. You did the right thing. They say violence isn't the answer, but you should always defend yourself. You got me, little mamas?”

Your daughter giggled. Leaning closer to the screen she stage-whispered, “I made his nose bleed. His little ugly self deserved it.”

“That's my girl.”

“Unh-uh! Don't hype her up. She'll be swinging on everybody from this point forward,” you teased. “You’re trying to turn every member in this household into a TTGK.”

You and Rio had formed the acronym for when he wanted to discuss business without the little ones understanding. He chuckled at your use of ‘Trained To Go Killa.’

“I'm just trying to keep the love of my life and my babies ready.”

“I know, Papa. Stay ready-.”

“So you don't have to get ready,” your baby girl said, finishing your sentence.

“See? Just grown,” you teased, giving your daughter a little tickle. “Mommy needs to talk to Daddy. Go tell your sisters and brothers to get washed up for dinner,” you instructed, kissing her soft round cheek.

The minute she darted away, your eyes connected with your husbands. You bit your lip as his eyes roamed over the sight of you.

“Aren't you working?”

“Somethin’ like that,” he glanced at the three women looking gobsmacked. Rio cut his eyes at them, shaking his head, he continued, “I always got time for wifey and my babies though.”

“I need you to stop eyeing me like you’re about to take me down,” you squeaked.

“Oh, I plan to. When I get home,” he responded, baritone smooth as silk.

“Aht, aht! Chill. I have children to feed. I don't need to have impure thoughts at the dinner table.”

“Wouldn’t be the first, nor the last time that’s happened, mama.”

“Anyway! I tried to explain that situation to her.”

“What? That the little jerk needed his ass beat?”

“No, Rio! You act like you weren't doing the same thing at that age. His square-headed behind was flirting with her.”

“Nah, mama. I was smooth with it. You didn’t know? I’ve always had emotional intelligence. Even back then. Flirting or not, mans still needed some sense knocked into him. Do I know him? Who’s his pops? Might need to have a little chat with him.”

“First of all. Why am I not surprised you had the girlies in a frenzy, even back then? You were probably bringing them little fast-ass girls flowers and all,” you joked, playfully rolling your eyes. “You will not be going to talk to that boy’s father. You can’t threaten everybody, Papa.”

“Who said I was going to make threats? I just wanna talk.”

“Yeah, right. Keep lying in my face. Leave that family alone, Rio. If it happens again, then, by all means, do what you need to do. Hell, I might even have a chat with his mama, but let’s just wait and see. Okay, Papa?”

“You lucky I love your ass,” Rio grunted.

Marcus and your eldest daughter walked into the kitchen with rapid-fire questions.

“Your rude ass children are hungry. Let me go feed these beautiful heathens.”

“I ain’t forgot about taking you down. Be ready for me when I get home, yeah?”

Your two eldest children started to make gagging noises, reminding you that children were present. They pleaded with you not to have another baby. Jokingly, of course.

“Y’all always blocking on your pops. Chill on me. That’s my wife and I’ma love on her.”

Rio took a minute to say hello to the rest of his children. With an ‘I love you’ and promises of ‘cuddles’ later that night, Rio ended the call. He locked the device, sliding it back into his jacket pocket.

His eyes cut back to the three stooges (a name Mick had given them). The three women stared at Rio befuddled.

“Back to my money-.”

“How on earth do you do that,” Ruby questioned in amazement.

“Do what,” Rio responded curtly.

“You were seconds away from busting a cap in our behinds. In a snap of a finger, your entire mood changed. You slid right into daddy mode,” Ruby said, still in awe.

“Damn, your daddy game is on point,” Annie praised, following it with a yelp. Ruby had mugged the back of her head.

“You’re so calm and gentle with your family. It’s just-,” Beth started.

“Oh, I get it,” he responded, nodding a few times. “The thugged-out, tatted-up gangster is supposed to be the run-of-the-mill deadbeat baby daddy, right? We’ll also spin the block on me poppin’ a cap so to speak, because I still don’t see a duffle bag anywhere in sight.”

“That’s not what I meant at all,” Beth stammered, face red.

Rio cut his eyes to the shaky redhead. “Doubtful, but fuck all that. Yes, I take care of mine. I’ll give every last one of them the world if they ask for it. Now slide your asses out of my personal life, and go get my fucking money.”

Rio’s patience was dwindling by the second. He was ready to get to the money and get home to his wife. His tongue traced his lips at the thought of her.

These bitches need to stop wasting my time. I’m tryin’ to kiss my babies goodnight and put mama to sleep.

How did you lovelies like the latest update of Dad!Rio and his family of...I believe it's still six at the moment😆😂🥰? Comments and reblogs are appreciated my loves💖.

lovelies💜:

@astoldbychae @percosim @darqchilddaydreamz @thirtysomethinganduncensored @ravennaortiz

@amorestevens @abcdestinyyyy @jannavaire @novaniskye

@nobodygetsza @bisexuallyattractivebitch @1andonlytashae

@rio-reid-whoreee @lovedlover @sunshine-flower @realhotgurlshit

@thebumbqueen @blowmymbackout @tashawar @captainwithoutmakingitlove @kinkiicoils @theegoddessofmelanin

@beachyserasims @tbmotw @wroteitbutneverwatchedit @speckldsimblr

[justin-chapmanswers]

Sorry if this is a bit rude, but how do you consider yourself as he/they or they/he? I am questioning my sexuality and gender at the moment and seeing you (idk if ur lgbt) makes me find comfort, if you can, how did you realise you were not straight and how I can find mine! :3

Oh golly uh. Let's see if I can keep this short and then bury it under other answers. <3

Labels are fun cause they're so funky and ever-changing as you learn more about yourself. So, firstly, don't stress about finding something so perfect right away and bounding yourself to it. You're still you, any way you word it.

Gender-wise I'm in a state of def preferring they but being chill enough with he. Like whateverrrrr. It's hard to get around societal norms and perceptions, so my expectations are calibrated accordingly. I of course feel that for people who feel more strongly about a specific label, it's important to fight for it to be recognized whenever you're in a safe-enough environment to do-so. But for me, the concept of pushing for a specific label or, even more-so, of seeing other people pushing others to use a specific label for me is veryyyy anxiety-inducing. I tend to avoid spotlight when possible. But at the same time, a lot of it just comes down to not wanting to be grouped/perceived gender-ly at all. I tend to use the label agender. But I'm sure a lot of people have similar experiences with different labels. I just, ya'know, wanna be me.

Gender exploration is funnnn. There's no one right way to learning about yourself. Some people know from a young age, almost inherently, some people figure things out a lot later. It's never too late. Some people learn with outfits and styles, some with looking to people/characters who they want to be perceived more-like, some with experimenting through new names/pronouns and feeling-out how being called different things makes them feel. If you have friends you feel safe around with all of this, on or offline, can't hurt to say "hey would ya mind calling me x-name or y-pronoun for a bit?" And if you don't like it, you don't need to stick with it. But really be cognizant of it feels right to you.

Then on the romantic orientation side, that's been a much longer journey haha. I was calling myself straight through middle schooler, bi for a bit in early high school, gay starting in later high school, then for a long while. Nowadays I just say queer. Labels make things easier, until they don’t haha. For me, if you imagine a scale of feminity to masculinity with like little pegs running down the line from 0 to 10, with 5 in the middle, I tend to find myself attracted to people in like the 4 to 8 range? Something like that. But even that's not perfectly consistent! There's never going to be a perfect word for everything. That's why I like queer as an umbrella term. It's also just a cute word, I don't make the rules.

Hence earlier when I mentioned that you should just feel free to keep it open and not close yourself off. Maybe nothing'll change, but what if something does? But of course, I assume you're asking from more of a place of just starting this journey. I'm trying to get my mind back to where I started with that. I think the first time the not-straight realization hit was when a friend of mine didn't show up to an event and I was all like "why am I so miserably sad that he wasn't there?" And then a lightbulb appeared over my head and out-loud I said "aw damnit." And then things have been weird and confusing ever since.

But in terms of giving advice, it's hard to not just be like "uhh idk just hang out with people that makes you feel gooey." But obviously it's more complicated than that. A decade ago, I was taking random "am I gay" tests online. But they're kinda silly cause the questions on those would ask me to fill in information about how I feel, but how am you supposed to know how I feel without the test telling me how I feel??????? So realistically, I'd advise private journaling. Just take some time, even five minutes. Start now. Write out who you are drawn to, in any sense, and how they make you feel. Especially if you're like me and have trouble self-reflecting unless I force myself to. Like. In a Tumblr post.

There's so many ways to explore. It's also nice to look at relationships in life and media and seeing if you connect to any relationship or long to fit into someone's place within a relationship. That's why representation matters, baybeeeee! But also, ya'know, talking to people goes a long way to learning about yourself. Trial 'n error let's gooooo.

And above all: you got this.

[mustainegf]

high sex with kirk. just being his best friend but you get so horny from the weed that you just HAVE to fuck. need that NEOWWW

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD IDEA?? AND SOOO KIRK

𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 ¹⁹⁸⁶

We were lounging on the old couch in Kirk's basement, the joint being passed back and forth. The room was dark except for the lava lamp, its slow hypnotic glow casting a dim light on everything. Everything was seeming a little funky, like the weed was hitting us a little bit harder than it usually did. My head was foggy in the right way, my body felt heavy, it was sinking deeper into the cushions.

Kirk took a long drag, his eyes half closed. "Man, this stuff is good," he managed to say in a slow, lazy tone. He passed the joint back to me and I hit it, feeling the smoke burn slightly before I let it out in a soft, hazy cloud.

I turned to him, and something caught my eye. He shifted in his seat, almost uncomfortably. It took a moment for me to realize what was going on, and then when I did, I couldn't help but laugh. "Kirk, are you…?" I laughed, motioning to the very obvious bulge in his black jeans.

He groaned, tossing his head back onto the couch. "Don't," he muttered while covering his face with his hand. I was already laughing, that uncontrollable, high pitched giggle that comes when you're way too high and everything feels way more hilarious than it should be.

"I can't help it!" I sputtered, giggling. "It's just there!" I waved my hand in a general direction at his lap, and he groaned again, his cheeks flushing a little. "What's got you all worked up, huh?" I teased, nudging his arm.

He was groaning, but at the same time he was smiling, the corners of his mouth twitching up, he couldn't help but find it kind of funny too. "It's the weed," he mumbled. "It always makes me… you know."

I raised an eyebrow. "Horny?" I asked, barely suppressing another laugh. He nodded, clearly embarrassed which just made it funnier.

"Well," I said, smiling wryly, "what are you gonna do about it? 'Cause it doesn't seem like it's going anywhere." I relaxed back, my head resting against the back of the couch.

Kirk chuckled, running a hand through his messy black hair. "I don't know," he said, shifting uncomfortably again. "Just trying to, like, think of other stuff."

I looked at him, then at the bulge, which wasn't very clearly going away. "You sure about that?" I asked, grinning. I could see frustration on his face, but it was rather comical, in a weird way.

I couldn't stop myself. Without even thinking about it, I reached over and pressed down on his crotch, right on top of his jeans with a giggle. "Maybe 'little Kirk' just needs some help going down," I laughed.

The second my hand touched, though, he let out this low, almost helpless moan. I froze a second, my eyes wide. "Whoa," I said, laughing but also a little surprised. "Did that actually feel good?"

He bit his lip, half lidded eyes on mine. "You have no idea," he said, voice rougher now, almost desperate. "I told you, I'm too fucking high for this shit.

I blinked, teasing still but intrigued a little now. "So you're saying this isn't going away, huh?" I asked, pressing down again, this time harder. He moaned again; his hips shifted slightly under my hand.

I should have stopped there. Should've let it go, made another joke, moved on. Something about the way he reacted stirred something inside me. Maybe it was the weed, or maybe it was the way he looked at me-his eyes dark, needy. And I felt my body spark up, a burn started low in my belly.

"Well, what are you gunna do about it?" I asked, my voice lower now, maybe not quite as teasing.

Kirk looked at me, his eyes hot. "I can't… it's not just gonna go away," he growled, his voice low. "Not without, you know…" His eyes flashed to my lips and my pulse sped up.

My mouth went dry, but I forced a smile, keeping it light despite the fact that I was beginning to feel it, too. "What, you need me to fix it for you?" I teased, but there was heat behind my words now.

He didn't say a word, but the glint in his eye said it all. And before I could really think about what I was really doing, I moved, scrambling on top of him, straddling his lap. His hands came up to rest on my hips, like he’d been waiting to do so.

"This is probably a terrible idea," I said, but I was already tilting forward, my lips grabbing his.

"Probably," he agreed, but then his mouth was on mine, and the rest of the world went away.

It was a sloppy kiss, all fire and need. His hands slipped up underneath my T shirt, his calloused fingertips grazing my skin and shooting shivers down my spine. I could feel how hard he was beneath me, the rigid length of his arousal pressing against me through his jeans. I rocked down on him, and he groaned into my mouth, his grasp on my hips clenching tighter.

I pulled back just far enough to tug my shirt over my head, flinging it aside before reaching for his. He helped me, tugging it off in one smooth tug. His chest was hot to mine, heart pounding just as hard as mine was.

I leaned down, pressing kisses along his jaw, down his neck, while my hands fumbled with the button of his jeans. "Let's see if we can help 'little Kirk' out," I whispered, smirking against his skin.

He laughed breathlessly, but it degenerated into a groan when I finally succeeded in unzipping his jeans, sliding my hand inside. His cock was hot and pulsing, and I couldn't help but stroke him slowly, teasingly.

"Fuck," he hissed, hips bucking up into my hand. "You're killing me.”

I smiled, enjoying the control I had over him in this instant. But I was just as riled up now, my own body aching with need. "Then let's make it better," I said, getting up briefly to remove my jeans and underwear, just as he did his.

When we were both naked, I climbed back onto his lap, his cock pressing insistently against my entrance. I hesitated for just a second, meeting his eyes, and everything felt more comfortable, more real. But then he kissed me again, and I felt myself fall a little bit in love.

I sank down onto him slowly, both of us groaning at the sensation. He filled me completely and for a moment we just stayed like that, savoring the feeling. Then I started to move, rolling my hips in slow, steady motions, and he matched my pumps, his hands clamping onto my hips and guiding me up and down on his length.

It was messy, sloppy, but in the best of ways. We were frantic, our bodies slick with sweat. I rode him quick, my nails digging into his shoulders while his tip rubbed my G spot relentlessly.

Truthfully, it didn’t take either of us that long. The weed, combined with everything going on, just had both of us on the edge.

The tension built and built within my body, tighter and tighter until I just could not hold it back anymore. I came with a soft cry, my whole body trembling around him, and a few moments later, he followed, his hips jerking up into mine as he released inside me. Warm spurts heated me from the inside.

We stayed that way for a moment, both of us breathing hard, still tied in each other's arms. Then I fell against his chest, and he wrapped himself around me, holding me tight as we came down from the high.

"Well," I said after a minute, my voice still tired, "that was…"

"Fucking crazy," he completed, and we both erupted into laughter, the sound echoing in the otherwise silent room.

We were high, tangled up in each other, but now the calm was in, that lazy satisfaction after the storm. I burrowed my face into his neck, feeling his heartbeat start to slow down beneath my cheek.

"I guess weed really does make you horny," I said, smirking against his skin.

He chuckled softly, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on my back. "Apparently.".

We spent some time just lying there, cuddling, our bodies still buzzing from the high, but much more relaxed now. No trace of awkwardness whatsoever, no weirdness-just two of us, laughing, holding each other, absolutely comfortable in the aftermath of everything.

Finally, I drew back far enough to take a good look at him, my fingers brushing a stray lock of hair out of his face. "So… round two?" I joked, raising an eyebrow.

He grinned. "Maybe after a nap.

[senblades]

Hi :)

I love your art and your writing, and you have such a great grasp of these characters that I was wondering if you have any fic recs? Rating doesn't matter ;)

boy do I! (and ty for the compliment <3 <3 <3)

[cracks knuckles] alrighty:

The Dissapearence of Goro Akechi by Kupowonders - Probably my favourite fic ever, honestly- it's like. derailing the plot of persona 5 post-medjed thanks to the persona 4 accomplice ending years prior. (So, spoilers for p4 in that, too) it's. very good.

Marigolds by Colbub - Akechi gets ng+'ed to right when he started working for Shido, and has to take a good look at the future to come and be like "Aight how the fuck do I fix this". Fun times!

Daredevil, You've hit the wall by ez_cookie. Essentially, p5 Strikers but Sumire and Goro get to be in on the fun, too. And, there's a direct sequel currently being updated that's a similar premise for p5 Tactica. very very good stuff

A Tale of Two Tricksters by Zoe2k8 - Murder boyfriends! ...sort of? Angst! Angst and murder boyfriends! An oversimplification, obviously, but I'm not kidding when I say this fic is amazing and is also over a million words holy shit-

Throw away your mask by MollyPollyKinz - Another ng+ situation for Akechi, but this time the poor guy gets thrown all the way to 2009. You can imagine how well that goes (For the audience, less so for Akechi himself.)

The Crow Cries at Midnight by Dorked. hehe this one is very fun. Basically, a series of coincedencs causes Akechi to get thrown into the plot of persona 4. No time travel here! Just a grumpy 12/13 year-old Akechi trying to solve a murder mystery

The entire Tales of Chaos series by Eternalmomentss (The first one is called Like sand between your fingers) Very very good stuff! Something of a character study, I would say, of Ren and Goro. Plus, all the funky plot stuff that comes from trickster-typical bad luck and poor descision making. I really love this series hehe

uhh this post is getting very long I need to make this less wordy- lightning round?

Hunger for a life by Leonawriter - do you like vampires? I sure do! Mix that and the p5 plot and you get shenanigins. [evil laughter] a lot of shenanigins

Fishbowl by KivaEmber - Akechi has a terrible time in Maruki's reality. And I mean a terrible time

You have a beautiful smile underneath that mask by Saposaki - Akechi has a crush on Akira and Joker has a crush on Crow. No one is aware of the other's secret identity. Dramatic irony and hilarity ensues.

MASTERMiND by StumblingBlock - No Metaverse au where Akira really doesn't want to follow in the footsteps of his crime family, and fails miserably

Rose and Rot by SixteenJuniper - Read this!! I'm serious!! "A fun fantasy adventure" don't listen to Juniper. You'll be in tears by chapter two. (/pos, of course) (Seriously this fic is incredible)

Redressing the Balance by Convocated - ...almost a ng+? Ng+, in the sense that shuake are getting funky visions that are very quickly derailing the standard plot of p5r. This causes problems of the "Someone get the popcorn and maybe the tissues" variety

She's got a heartbeat full of lead (And she's aiming straight for the head) by Dots - This fic haunts me, often. In the best way possible, of course; but seriously, read it

Cracked into by SydneyHorses - Ren makes bad descisions and it becomes Akechi's problem. 2/2 timeloop, perhaps most notably featuring HaruGoro friendship! Love love love this fic

Okay that wasn't as "less wordy" as I intended but it'll do

Aaaand that's a wrap! Sorry for the long post.. and this is by no means all of the fics that I've ever loved (nor are the ones here in any particular order) but I swear we'll be here all week if I keep going HAHA

ty for the ask (and again for the kind words), anon! Hope this was helpful and to your tastes! (I... hope you like Shuake HAHA it's present in most of these- I assume you do, since you came to me (points at literally everything shuake I've made) of all people, but uh. Some of these fics are gen if it's not to your liking?)