#he just started the third verse and was like wait that’s not it. and then someone from the audience helped him out
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lovely-v · 5 months ago
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Every time I hear Up The Wolves by the Mountain Goats now I think of when I saw them live a few weeks ago and when they did this song John Darnielle forgot the start of the second verse (“there’s gonna come a day when you feel better”) and no hate to him obviously he’s got a huge catalog of songs it does not reflect on his overall immense talent that he forgot the words to one of them once but I did find it hilarious in the moment because like. Ok. I guess there is NOT gonna come a day when you feel better
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gutsby · 9 months ago
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Ruined!
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Pairing: dbf!Joel x Reader
Summary: Joel is an old man who struggles to cum sometimes. You’ve got time to kill and a tight hole to fill.
Warnings: 18+. Peepaw brainrot + a dash of anorgasmia. Unprotected p-in-v, cockwarming, age gap, daddy kink.
Note: Finals are whooping my ass left & right. This is a quickie.
Word count: 1.2k | Part of the Waiting Game ‘verse
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Surely he was hurting you now.
Joel Miller had a kink for many, many fun activities, but splitting a sweet young thing like you over his cock to the point you were almost in tears was just not one of them.
At the same time your poor, surely-bruised walls pulsed around his hardened length, he felt a pang of guilt. His balls were pressed against your ass like two lead weights, soaked with the remains of your third release, and his mind was at war with itself—keep fucking you like this? Pull out and offer his sincerest apologies for not being able to cum? A boy your age would’ve never had you waiting around like that, aching around his cock, much less begging for something as simple as a cumshot.
He decided to go straight to the source. Leaning over your prone body on the bed before him, he was careful not to rut his hips or jostle his dick around too much.
Joel pressed a hot, stubbled kiss to your cheek, then:
“‘S’it too much, baby? She need a break, maybe?”
Joel thumbed at that space where your body ended and his began and nearly lost his mind to the pearly-white slick that had accumulated with time. Two hours time, he had to remind himself while you moaned and writhed and bucked your ass back. Your cunt was choking him.
Crying, too.
Your eyes flew open the moment his words reached you.
“You kiddin’ me, Miller?! I could do this shit all day.”
Sometimes Joel forgot you were only in your twenties. Really, the thought only occasionally crossed his mind in moments like these—or when your father, his best friend, happened to bring you up—but when it did, it hit him hard. You were young. Lively. Surely far too spry and full of life to be messing around with a man as old as him.
Joel’s guilt ran almost commensurate with his pleasure when he felt you anchor your feet on the bed and start to fuck yourself back and forth over his still-throbbing dick.
Almost.
He planted a hand beside your head and grinned. He let you fuck him. Felt you pull off, crawl up the bed a little, then beckon him back to your body, where your ass was now pointing up and your back was arched in invitation.
Almost.
“You know I can’t sleep without your cum inside me.”
And you made a point to spread your knees and look behind you with a smile as sweet as Milo’s tea, fingers drumming a beat against the bedspread in anticipation.
“You do wanna fill me up, don’t you, daddy?” you teased.
Yeah, no. The guilt was gone. Joel could worry about being a depraved old man when he was done cumming.
Then he was back inside you, driving his hips until every last inch of him was wrapped snug within your wet and velvety embrace, and he sighed. A real protracted one, like the kind he was liable to exhale after climbing two flights of stairs, or else just hoisting himself off the sofa. Or lifting you in his arms and fucking you hard against the hood of his Bronco. Any time. Any place. You were kind enough to oblige him with the best cardio of his life, so the least Joel could do now was make you cum again.
He snatched your hands up in one of his own and placed your wrists at the base of your spine. With his other, free set of fingers he took to rubbing your clit gently.
“SON OF A—”
“—good girl.”
You let out a bloodcurdling scream into your pillow and secretly hoped this man’s dick would never deflate again. Not with the way he was sawing his thing back and forth and dragging you to the edge, circling your clit like you were the single most precious thing in the world to him.
“Oh, sweet pea, I didn’t mean to make you cry.”
Like he could feel the tears staining the cushion himself.
“Mmrooonme,” you cried into it, voice garbled by cotton.
“What’s’at, honey? Can’t hear ya.”
Joel then bent at the waist, pretending to be leaning in to hear you better, when really he knew he’d be digging in your guts with that big, bulbous head of his and making you squeal again. Hands still held captive behind you, you inched your chin back on the pillow so your moans could be heard even louder while Joel sped up.
“You— ruined me,” you repeated. Now clear as ever.
Joel tried to hide his smile and glanced down between your body and his. Then, while his ring finger joined the other two to make their tight, light circles, he returned,
“Ruined? Pussy feels just fine t’me.”
You’d kill him if he wasn’t so good at this. You turned your head more to meet his eyes from the corner of yours.
“No. Ruined me. For anyone else.”
Probably forever.
“Good.”
You knew he liked it that way.
You saw it in his eyes. Felt it in his touch. The hefty, broad, and greying Joel Miller had been loafing around on this earth long enough to know how to claim what was his. When his hips knocked yours to lay you flat on the bed, you already knew what was coming next.
First, his arms came to rest on either side of your body.
“Shit,” you whimpered.
Next, his lips went trailing down to your ear.
“Just a little more, sugar—that’s it,” he murmured while his hips sank in, and you felt that big, delicious stretch.
Then he released your hands so they were free to squeeze the sheets, and when they did, his moved over them—lacing his fingers through your own—and his lips pressed a kiss to your jaw. He held you in a tender grasp. His breath was hot on your neck, and the whole of his body was blanketing yours. Joel knew you liked it like that, which is why he made sure not to leave an inch of space in between. He was grunting, rutting, holding you close while his cock drilled a maddening pace inside you.
“You ruined me too, y’know,” he mumbled into your skin.
His nose was flush with the side of your cheek, nudging inward. Begging you to turn your head just a little more so he could kiss you. Weak as you were, you obliged.
And you moaned against that grey, stubbled chin of his when the thrusts above you had your cunt grinding the bed, rubbing that soft and helpless nub on the sheets.
“C’mon— let daddy have it,” he growled, “Let daddy have it and make it his, huh? That okay by you, baby?”
It was.
More than okay, as confirmed by the orgasm that tore through your body moments later while your teeth sank into the flesh of Joel’s lower lip and your cunt clenched and soaked over him whole. Joel wedged his tongue in your mouth and fucked you through it. His broad and callused hands were like iron around your own, holding you tight and keeping you still amidst a maelstrom of pleasure that combed over your every last nerve.
He licked into your mouth. Licked over it. Took the sick and distinct pleasure of knowing no one but him got to see you like this, with your jaw hanging slack and your eyes rolling back and your whines repeating quietly, ‘Daddydaddypleasedaddyfuckohfuckdontstop.’
Maybe ruined wasn’t such a bad thing to be at all.
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coryosbaby · 1 year ago
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—1-800-ʙᴀɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢᴏᴅꜰᴀᴛʜᴇʀ !
(Dark! Dbf! Anakin Skywalker x fem! Reader)
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𝓈𝓎𝓃𝑜𝓅𝓈𝒾𝓈: your parents leave you home alone to tend to the christian faith. It’s a good thing that your daddy’s friend is there to help you atone !
୨୧ Content warning . Dubious consent (reader is sheltered & naive, but consents), blasphemy & strong religious themes, manipulation, baby trapping? age gap (reader is of age and in her 20s)// innocence kink, god complex, loss of virginity, size kink, oral, pnv, missionary + full nelson position
Disclaimer: I am not religious, though I do know there are people that are. pls block if it bothers you! This is solely fiction and not meant to offend anyone, and I don’t condone using religion as a way to manipulate or hurt others. Thanks! ⋆。˚ ⋆
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Your parents leaving you alone is honestly a scary experience.
Although it’s fun (having the house to yourself means having the large flat screen tv in the living room), you’ve come to find that at night you’re quite afraid of the dark. And of course, your family has left on an adult-only Christian retreat and has left you home alone.
Sure, you’re more than old enough. But you haven’t been exactly… exposed to the world around you. So the idea of monsters and demons filling the dark corners of your home, it becomes even more prominent.
You try to concentrate on your bible, try to read through the verses where God tells you to fear no evil, but the paranoia is creeping in on your cold spine like a winter’s chill. You try to listen to music, too, to drown out the whispers you hear in the night.
But to no avail.
You decide that you have no choice but to call the only contact that’s available to you.
Anakin is your godfather, in the sense that he’s your father’s best friend. He’s always been around, and he’s always helped you with your studies. Anakin— Ani, as you sometimes call him, lives less than a few blocks away. He always tells you that if you need him, he’ll be there. So it wouldn’t hurt to ring him up, right?
Pressing the dial on your phone, you type in his number with ease. Biting your thumb nail you wait for him to answer. He picks up on the third ring.
“Y/N? Is everything okay?”
You smile at his voice, the one that always gives you that tingly feeling in your stomach. You suspect that it’s because he’s your favorite person.
“Everything’s fine, Ani. Are you at work?”
“It’s a Saturday, isn’t it?”
“Well… yeah.”
“Then I’m off work, sweetheart,” he replies softly, and then you get that tingly feeling again. “Why did you decide to call?”
It’s not in the sense that he’s annoyed— he’s genuinely curious. You nervously rock back and forth on the balls of your feet.
“Well—“ you start, embarrassed. “Mom and dad are out, ‘n— it’s dark.”
“Dark?”
“It’s—“ you can feel tears beginning to form in your eyes as the wind creaks outside. “I don’t like it, Ani. I don’t wanna be alone in here... Please come.”
Anakin’s cock presses against his zipper at the sound of your whiny, desperate voice. He palms his bulge through his slacks.
“Yeah, baby. ‘Course I’ll come,” he pauses. “Just gotta do something first, okay? Then I’ll be there as soon as possible.”
You sniffle, the tears beginning to fall now.
“Okay. ‘M sorry.”
��For what? Don’t apologize to me sweetheart. Just wait there.”
A good forty minutes later Anakin is there, and when you open the door for him you latch onto him like a leech— your hands wrap around his waist, your bury your face into his fit chest, and you whimper against him as he coos gentle reassurances to you.
“It’s okay, baby. Ani’s here.”
“Promise?”
“I promise. I’m not goin’ anywhere.”
He brings you over to the couch, sitting you on the cushion beside him as he looks down at your pink bible. He notes that you use the wooden cross necklace he had bought you for your nineteenth birthday as a bookmark.
“Been readin’?” He notes, looking down at the opened pages. You’ve been highlighting some verses, and next to this book there’s another: Christianity for Women.
“Mhm.”
Anakin picks it up with idle hands. He flips to the first chapter.
“C’mere. Want me to read to you?”
“Yes, sir.” You reply, and with a gentle flick to your hair you begin to climb into his lap. It’s not uncommon for you to do this— he’s so comfy and warm. Even though sometimes the things in his pocket tend to poke against your bottom, you don’t mind. It’s worth it if Ani has his big arms wrapped around you.
He grunts as you settle down on him— his cock twitches as he feels your panties hit his lap. Your skirt is covered just enough to not expose you, but it still rides up as you sit down. His hand grips your thigh, and with the other he settles the book in his palm.
“Chapter 1,” he clears his throat. “Rules.”
Well, okay. If you say so.
“Women should always follow their faith in God.”
Fair enough.
You nod along, as he reads the next.
“Women should go to church every Sunday.” He smirks, turning to you. “Do you go to church every Sunday?”
“Of course! I love church.”
Anakin chuckles, flipping to the next page and adjusting himself from underneath you.
“Rule number three,” he says. His voice hesitates as he reads the next line, then he awkwardly clears his throat. “No premarital sex.”
Your brows furrow, bottom lip pulling between your teeth. “What’s that?”
He sucks in a breath, his cock beginning to become hard for a second time today.
“Sex? It’s—“
“No, no,” you giggle, your hand coming up to cover your mouth. “I meant— I know what sex is, Ani. Sort of. But.. what is premarital sex?”
“It’s sex before marriage. Doing it with someone you aren’t going to devote yourself to.”
“Oh.” You twiddle your fingers, eyes averting down to look at the ink splattered pages. “But— if you do it with someone you’re going to devote yourself to, without being married anyway, isn’t that still non premarital? I mean, in a way, you are married…sort of.”
Anakin shrugs, resting his head on your shoulder. You try to ignore how the closeness of his breath makes you tingle.
“Dunno, honey. I guess so. Never thought of it that way.”
You nod, wiggling around on his lap to get more comfortable. Anakin’s fingers grab your hips with a firm hand.
“Have you ever done it?” You ask. “Premarital sex, I mean.”
He lets out a breathy chuckle. Something in him is breaking apart, all these years of pent up sexual frustration for you beginning to come to a head as his resolve crumbles.
“Yes. Many times,” he coincides. “With a lot of people I didn’t care about. I shouldn’t of done that. It’s bad.”
Your face fills to the brim with heat, as the tension in the room grows incredibly thick. Your eyes widen when you feel him hump against your clothed cunt.
“What about you, baby?” He whispers against the shell of your ear. “Have you done it?”
You stutter, hesitating, and that’s when Anakin gets his answer.
“Right. ‘Course you haven’t,” and then, quietly, as if to himself, “Too precious for those boys…”
You let out a small sound in the back of your throat, that tingly feeling growing evermore prominent. You don’t know why you’re feeling this way. Maybe it’s the heat in the room, maybe it’s your claustrophobia.
Or maybe, you think, it’s the devil.
White hot heat coils in your private parts, and you try to get off of Anakin to get rid of feeling. He tsks, grabbing your hips and shoving you back into his lap. You whine, hands gripping is in an attempt to get away.
“Ani.. c’mon—“
“Do you touch yourself?” He asks darkly. You let out a little gasp. “Do you touch your princess parts, sweetheart?”
You shake your head, almost too quickly, and can’t help but press your thighs together. Anakin is having none of it.
“Liar,” he hisses. “You have. Don’t lie to me. I know when you’re lying to me.”
“I’m sorry!” You whimper against his harsh grip. “I-I stopped! I did, I really did, and I’ve been meaning to repent and atone for my sins but I haven’t yet…please, Ani.”
Tears of shame begin to fall from your eyes, wet and salty. You let out a little cry. Anakin softens a bit, his grip on you loosening. He wraps his arms around your tummy and quietly shushes you.
“It’s okay. It’s okay, angel, I know you didn’t mean to,” he coos, as your hands move around to rest in the locks of his hair. “Sensitive baby. I know it’s hard not to touch yourself down there. ‘S okay.”
“Promise?” You sniffle, turning your head to look into his eyes. He smiles.
“I promise.”
Your eyes innocently move down to his lips, that feeling growing inside even more.
“Ani..” you whisper. “It’s.. I want to.. to touch myself again. I don’t know how to control it…”
He strokes your hair out of your face with his fingers, cooing again.
“It’s okay,” and then, after a moment, with his cock pressed flush against your cunt, “I can help. Do you want me to?”
“But.. isn’t that premarital sex?”
He presses a kiss against your earlobe.
“You love me, don’t you? And I know I love you. So isn’t that marital sex?”
Your brain has turned into a puddle. Softly, you whisper out, “yes.”
He smiles against your skin, his hands sliding up past the expanse of your thighs.
“There’s something they don’t tell you about sex,” he murmurs. “When you let the man you love inside you, it’s a way to celebrate god. You become one with god.” He quirks a brow, watching you listen closely to him. “And you atone. Don’t you want to atone, baby?”
Your doe eyes look up at him, and you nod. He grins, knowing he’s got you exactly where he wants you. His thumb pulls the flesh of your bottom lip down and he watches it bounce back against your teeth.
“Why don’t you give me a kiss? Hm, pretty?”
And just like that, he’s got you. Your lips, ever so softly, come up to peck his. He smiles.
“Again.”
And you do kiss him again. Only this time, he presses hard into your mouth and it’s not long before his hands are tangling in your hair and he’s rubbing his tongue against your bottom lip. It’s all surreal, this man below you, his cock hard. You don’t know that, of course. Pulling away from him, you have a confused look on your face.
“What’s always in your pocket? ‘S poking me.”
Anakin doesn’t say anything. He just laughs at you, and leans in for more of your kisses. You get too lost in the feeing of his hands massaging your inner thighs to press him for an answer. But you find out soon enough when you feel him push your hand down into the front of his pants. Letting out a small squeak, you feel the warm skin of his cock. Something tugs at your lower tummy again.
“Oh.” you say softly, understanding. It was never something in his pocket— it was him.
“Feel what you did to me?” Anakin huffs out, as he guides your hand up and down on his length. “That’s my cock, baby. It’s what happens when I get really excited to see you.”
A small smile grazes your features at the thought of Anakin liking your presence. A whole lot, it seems, because his body is physically reacting. He grunts when you squeeze his length out of curiosity.
“Does it hurt?” You murmur, watching him.
“Not at all,” he coincides, adjusting you on his lap. “Feels good.“
And okay, that’s even better. Now you’re making Anakin feel good. Pride floods your chest. Watching him, you feel his precum drip down your fist.
“Can I see it?”
Your voice surprises him, and he’s nodding so quickly that it seems like he might break his neck.
“‘Course, pretty girl, can watch it all day if you want to…” looking at you hungrily, he mutters in a soft tone, “C’mere, get on your knees.”
Confusion muddles your brain, but not as much as the ache to please him. You crawl off of his lap, and he takes one of the couch pillows and places it on the floor.
“Sit.” He commands, and you rest your knees on the pillow and your small hands on his big thighs.
He unbuttons his fly, then his zipper. His bulge is straining against his briefs, a wet patch on the front from his arousal. Gulping, you watch as he pulls his pants and underwear all the way down and slips them off.
His length springs free, dripping with pre and insanely long. Your eyes widen as you watch it, wondering: where does it go?
Okay. So, you have a vague idea of where it’s supposed to go— somewhere in you, but you don’t know where. But either way, you know for for a fact that wherever that is isn’t adjustable enough for such a big thing. Your face floods with embarrassment.
“Where do I…” you start, quiet. Anakin furrows a brow, grabbing his cock into his palm.
“Where do you what?”
You avoid his gaze.
“Where do I.. put it?”
A smile quirks on the man’s lips, stroking himself to the sight of your pretty face peering at his cock.
“Your mouth, sometimes. But especially where you touch yourself, angel. Your cunt.” He tilts his head, not shaming you but trying to explain. “Do you know what your cunt is?”
You shyly nod, knowing that that’s what some of the guys around town called that spot where you touch yourself. And now, feeling this odd tingle inside you, it all makes perfect sense. It wants Ani inside.
But you frown at him.
“It won’t fit,” you say sadly. “‘S too big”
“It’ll fit, honey. Just have to stretch you first.”
Stretch you? That sounds painful! Fear courses through you.
“Stretch me?” You say worriedly.
Anakin seems amused by your reaction.
“It’ll only hurt a little, then it’ll feel really good,” he explains. “I promise. Don’t you trust me?”
Your head moves up and down, and you know that it’s true. He smiles softly, and then he’s tapping your lip with his finger.
“Open,” he says.
Your parted mouth falls completely open, pink tongue lolling out as he places the tip of his cock on it. It takes you by surprise, and your lashes flutter as his taste evades your senses. It’s an odd flavor— not too bad, but not too good either. Though, the thought of it being from Ani makes it all worth while. He slaps himself against your tongue a few times, the wet muscle making a plopping sound as his stringy precum creates a small puddle in your mouth. He watches, proud, and he praises you in the most gentle tone he can muster.
“Good girl. Such a pretty mouth, can’t wait to cum inside it…”
And that makes your eyes shut tight as you let out a loud whine, knowing that his cum is another delicious fluid that you will happily drink up soon. His cock guides itself even more into your mouth, the cockhead disappearing in between your plush lips. You use your mouth gently, treating his cock with care, not wanting to hurt him. He grunts when you swirl your tongue around him.
“Mmm,” he breathes. “Lick it, baby. Like an ice cream cone… yeahhh. Just like that, sweet girl.”
You hollow your cheeks around his mushroomed head, your brain becoming fuzzy at the feeling of his length moving in and out of your mouth. Suckling him, he’s soft and warm on your tongue.
You do this for quite some time. Anakin’s thrusts speed up, and he makes you take more and more and more. When you choke on him for the first time he tells you that it’s okay— “just get through it, baby, don’t you wanna be good for me?” And of course you do, because it’s Ani, and he’s really handsome and he smells really nice and his hands are so big as they card themselves through your hair. You can’t get enough and you’re almost angry he hadn’t shown you this sooner, that you had been shielded from this kind of pleasure. Your vision is dizzy as he uses your mouth.
On a particularly harsh thrust that makes your throat spasm around him, Anakin begins to make some very pretty noises. Drool leaks down your chin and chest, your mascara running, his balls slapping against your chin. He groans loudly.
“Gonna cum,” he mutters out. “Gonna fill up your throat. Do you want that, sweet girl?”
You can’t say anything, but you try your hardest to nod around his cock. He gets the message. And with stuttering hips, salty fluid shoots into the wet canal of your mouth. It fills you up until you’re choking, and as Anakin rides out his high his cock practically coats itself in cum as he moves in and out, in and out. He pulls you off of him after a moment, and with a mouth full of spend you gasp out for air. Anakin’s got this possessive stare in his eyes as he looks at you.
“Swallow it.”
You do. You gulp it down excitedly, and with a small “aaaaa” you stick out your tongue so he can see that you’ve consumed it all. Anakin looks down at you with a grin on his face.
“That’s my girl.”
“I want you to… to put it in me.”
Your voice speaks softly in the darkness of your room, rain pattering against your window as Anakin sits on your bed across from you. It’s been a week since your last… encounter. Your parents are out once again— and as requested, Anakin had shown up on your doorstep to keep you company. After a mug of hot chocolate, your favorite, you had invited the man into your room. A cross is around his neck, shiny with a silver chain. His hair is messy, his fingers clad in silver metal rings. You want to bite them.
Anakin smiles, pretty teeth shining.
“Do you know the story of the Virgin Mary?” He asks, out of context. Your eyes light up. Mary is your favorite biblical figure.
“Yes!” You reply to him. “She got pregnant by God.”
“And how did she do that?”
“By magic!” You say. “She gave birth to Jesus.”
Anakin chuckles, kissing your forehead softly.
“Such a smart girl. But sweetheart, magic didn’t give her a baby.” At the sight of your confused face, he continues. “Sex did. That’s how all babies are made.”
Heat creeps up your neck, your face puzzled. “So you’ll give me a baby?”
Anakin should be frightened at the thought of getting his best friend’s daughter pregnant, but he isn’t. In fact, he smiles, his touch leaving tingles against your skin.
“If that’s what you want. Just imagine, angel..” his lips brush against your ear, smoothing back a strand of your hair. “A beautiful baby. My nose, my lips.. those pretty eyes of yours.”
You bite your lip, your heart fluttering. Having Anakin’s baby would be your dream! Having a house with him, children running around, Anakin coming home from work everyday…
Oh, but daddy would be so mad.
He would never look at you the same again. He would be ashamed, he would damn you to the deepest pit of hell.
You think these things so incredibly, but once Anakin’s lips press against yours all of those things go away. He kisses you slow, sweet, gentle. His stomach presses against your tummy.
“I can’t wait to see it. Your little belly, all swollen with my baby..”
And daddy is out of your thoughts and replaced with a new, different daddy: Anakin.
It’s not long before he’s got you laid down on your ruffled pink sheets, your baby blue nightgown gone (“cmon, let me see that pretty body”), with Anakin’s lips trailing down your neck. He’s gotten you prepped, used his fingers and tongue in oh so many ways that had made you quiver, used your throbbing cunt for his own meal. When you spread your legs for him this time, it’s so he can rub his incredibly hard length against the lips of your pussy. Delectable and sweet as he remembers, Anakin watches the way your leftover cum and slick coat his length generously.
He’s never seen a cunt so cute, so fat, so swollen and precious. He taps his cockhead against your clit, listens to the desperate little pleas you let out as you look up at him with doe eyes.
“Please, Ani, want your baby.”
“Please, daddy, put it inside me. My cunt’s so tight and wet for you..”
You don’t say that last part, Anakin’s imagination runs wild, but he knows you’re probably thinking that— thinking that as his mushroomed tip pops inside your entrance, stretching, burning. Thinking that as you cry, your salty tears his most delectable meal besides the thing in between your legs. Thinking that as you grimace, give him that pained look as he fully sheathes himself inside.
And then, he begins to move.
It’s like a fire in your gut, at first. Hot, burning, grating. But soon it gives way to something else— something not even his fingers can create, something that’s absolutely out of this world. Your nails dig into his back, leaving red welts along the skin, and you should apologize but you can’t bring yourself to care. Ani’s whispering something in your ear, something dirty, filthy, and deprived; you enjoy it so much, you really do, as he speaks to you like this.
“Good girl, so tight. Daddy’s so happy when he fucks his little princess.”
“Look at that, how red and swollen your little pussy is. Is my cock too big for it?”
After harsh thrusts, skin slapping against skin, and curled toes, Anakin pulls out of you. You almost sob from the loss, but it isn’t long before he lays you on top of him and slips himself back into your sopping hole, pulling your ankles behind your head. This causes your eyes to flutter open again, a small moan leaving you. Anakin brings his hands around to hold your legs and head in a chokehold. He fucks you like that, all twisted and overstimulated.
Looking down, you watch as his length fills you to the brim and moves in and out of you.
“A-Am —“ you sniffle, a pleasured sob racking through your throat. “Am I being good, Ani? Is… Is god inside me now?”
Anakin groans, his hips pressing even harder against your raw fucked pussy.
“Yeah, baby,” He breathes, his hand pressing against the bulge poking out of your lower tummy. “God’s in you. Right in this little tummy.“
You mewl, understanding his words, the blasphemy in them. A blush coats your cheeks as you murmur out, “don’t say that.. ‘s bad. You’re being bad.”
“But I’m making you feel so good. Aren’t I, baby?” He taunts, with a hint of malice in his voice. “Isn’t this what you wanted? A thick, hard cock to fill up this little pussy?”
You shake your head, trying to deny yourself this pleasure you can’t contain. Anakin chuckles.
“Yes, it is. I can tell when you’re lying, pretty girl... oh, look at you. Little legs are shaking. Poor baby…”
You should feel guilty for all the dirty things leaving his sinful mouth. You should hate him and find him icky and push him away. Hes a dirty, filthy man.
But… he’s your Ani. The man who protects you, hugs you when you’re sad, buys you your favorite lip gloss and stuffed animals. And that cross is dangling in pressing against your back, cold and heavy like a burden but still turning you on and— he smells so good, and although you keep trying to move away from his harsh fucking, you know in your mind that you don’t want him to stop. Little sounds escape your throat with each thrust, moans and whines that sound like a wounded animal. But you are far from wounded— unless you count the soreness you’re probably going to feel tomorrow from Anakin pounding your guts.
Grunting, his arms flex on each side of you as he grasps your body with firm hands.
The man’s cock moves against your walls harshly, slick penetrating the skin of your thighs and making you shake. A smirk glazes his lips as he watches your face contorted in pleasure, and your neck is craned so you can see every facial expression he makes.
You thought you had never seen God. But right now, you might not be so sure.
“Good little angel,” he groans gently. “Such a tight little fuck hole for daddy.”
You want to be disgusted by the name, wanted to be disgusted since the first time he said it, but before you can think too hard the tip of his mushroomed head slams against a certain spot that has you sobbing out, “daddy, daddy!” against your own accord. He moans himself at the sound of your pleasure.
“Good fucking girl. Hittin’ that princess spot so good, yeah? Pussy feelin’ good?”
Your eyes roll back, your body going limp like a rag doll as you relax against his jackhammering thrusts. It all feels too good. The Bible always talks about heaven and you think that this is truly it: Anakin below you, holding you down, humping into you like an animal, as he spews disgusting phrases into your ears.
Maybe he isn’t the devil. Maybe he’s God.
You can feel something building up in your tummy, the familiar butterflies now turning dark like moth wings, scraping against that one spot over and over and over. God grins from below you, and bringing his hand up he forces your mouth open with his big fingers. His spit lands down on your tongue, wet and warm and perfect.
“Swallow.” He commands, and you do it greedily. Your voice moans for more, aches for more, and he does it thrice.
“Do you trust me?” He growls. “Do you trust me, baby?”
“Yes! Yes sir.” You whimper, and you know it’s true when it falls from your lips. He forces his fingers to press even harsher around your head. Your ears ring, a pressure beginning to form in your skull.
“God’s got you,” Anakin growls. “God’s got you and your life in his hands. And you know what?”
You don’t say anything, just shake your head as you try to catch a breath of air.
“He’s not gonna let it go.” He continues. “You’re gonna feel this, honey. You’re gonna get fucked like this all the time—“ your vision is blurring, his words making you spasm. He brings his fingers down to that swollen button on your soaked pussy and rubs in harsh circles. “— When daddy thinks his precious little girl is asleep, when he thinks she’s praying to god, she’s going to be praying to me. Choking on my dick, getting fuckin’ bred. Do you want that? Do you want my cum, you fucking slut?”
You can’t really hear him anymore; your body has gone completely limp, your eyes fluttering shut as you ride out wave upon wave of pleasure. You’re still breathing, you know you are, but you fall unconscious in Anakin’s harsh grasp.
And when he sees you like that, all fucked out and deadweight, he groans and begins to pound you harder.
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changetyre · 4 months ago
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Make a wish
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SUMMARY: It's Ivy's 2nd Birthday and her birthday wish is a little bigger than you'd expected. Part of Verstappen Family Verse
WARNINGS: None?
A/N: Requested over on wattpad ;)
"Oh no Max the party hats, I forgot to get party hats." Your heart sunk to your stomach. 
"No, I bought some." Max calmed you down. 
Today was Ivy's 2nd birthday and she had been so insistent about celebrating her birthday at a race with her Papa and Uncles despite you telling her she could have a big birthday party at home with her friends. Ivy almost cried when you suggested something else wanting nothing more but to be at the "waces!" for her birthday. 
Despite this, you still wanted her birthday to have somewhat of a little celebration so you'd spent days making and decorating cupcakes to take to the paddock and buying some decorations for Ivy. 
You'd wanted everything to be a surprise so you'd mostly work at night so that the girls didn't see you because you also knew that if Lea saw anything she would definitely say something since she was as good at keeping secrets as her uncle Lando.  
But Max could tell how stressed and tired you'd grown with trying to get everything perfect for her and he was glad it was finally the day so you could relax a little. You'd woken up earlier to get the stuff in the car so that Brad could drive it to the track before you arrived with Max, Ivy, and Lea. 
"Okay, I'll go now." Brad got in the car to drive off. 
"Wait no did I bring down the streamers?" You asked. 
"Yes," Max answered waving Brad away. 
"Wait what about the-" 
"Schatje, everything's there." Max cupped your face to get you to look at him. 
"But what if-" 
"If it's not she won't even notice darling, it'll be perfect because we'll be there." Max kissed you not letting you argue further. He could feel you relax in his arms. 
"I'm sorry, I just want everything to be perfect." You hugged your husband tightly. 
"You'll never reach perfection baby, trust me I've tried" Max kissed your head. "But you're close enough and Ivy's gonna love whatever we do for her." 
 __________
"PAPA WOOK!" Ivy yelled excitedly as she ran out of her room. 
Max turned to see his daughter in a big puffy Belle dress which she had begged him to buy for her birthday. 
"Oh my god is that Belle?" Max gasped dramatically. 
You stood by the door watching the interaction with loving eyes. 
"No Papa is me Iby!" Ivy ran up to her dad who lifted her up and twirled her around. 
"How's my gorgeous birthday girl?" Max kissed her cheeks. 
"Papa I tuwn two." Ivy held up her tiny hand trying to hold up 2 fingers but her third finger kept slipping out of the grasp of her little thumb and pinky finger. 
"Yes, you do and you need to stop growing." Max hugged her closer sighing at the idea of his girls growing up. 
A few seconds later Lea peaked her head around the corner of her room. "Mamma?" She called your name. 
"You ready baby?" You asked your daughter whom you'd also bought a dress for since you wanted to make sure she didn't feel left out. 
She nodded shyly, she'd started growing shy around you and her dad lately whenever she showed you something which you found adorable. 
She walked out wearing her Belle dress too except hers was the blue town dress and you'd helped her put a blue bow on her hair. 
"What a gorgeous princess!" Max also sighed dramatically while holding Ivy who clapped in his arms happily. 
You had breakfast quickly, the girls and you having pancakes as a treat for Ivy's birthday while Max had to eat something else to keep his weight down for getting in the car later. 
You strapped everyone into the car and off you went to the race track. 
________
As soon as you arrived there were cameras everywhere but by now the girls were used to it especially Lea who liked to pose for the cameras despite Max and you telling her to keep her head low. 
"Mama Wando?" Lea pointed down to the McLaren hospitality as you approached the Redbull hospitality. 
"Maybe we'll see him later Ivy he's not here yet." You lied and heard her sigh sadly as she rested her head on your shoulder.
You'd arrived at the track pretty early since Max didn't have to be on the track until around 4 today but as a surprise for Ivy's birthday, You and Max had asked the boys if they could arrive early to surprise Ivy for her birthday knowing she would just want to spend the day with her favorite people. 
You walked into the Redbull hospitality and Brad, Vicky, and other staff members were there ready just like planned. 
"Ivy look!" Max called out to his daughter who lifted her head from your shoulder to look towards her dead. 
"SURPRISE!" They called out as party poppers went off and confetti flew everywhere Ivy's eyes and mouth were wide open as she looked around the decorated room. 
She squealed in your arms squirming for you to put her down and as soon as you did she went running to where there were presents and a huge cake with a small fondant F1 car where Ivy was the driver wearing a tiara. 
"PAPA LOOK!" Ivy called out to her dad pointing at the top of the cake. 
"Wow, Ivy." Max gasped surprised as if he hadn't specifically asked for her cake. 
You looked around to look for Lea just to find her munching away at the snacks that were laid out across the snack table despite eating breakfast not long ago. Just as you turned again you noticed Lando, Dani, Carlos, and Charles at the door, Ivy too distracted looking at her cake with her dad to notice. 
"Come in." You waved the drivers over. Max had previously discussed all of this with Christian and he'd gladly accepted having the drivers over at the hospitality for a few hours for the celebration. 
"MY BABY!" Lando yelled as soon as he was inside. 
Ivy's head snapped immediately in the direction of her favorite person. "WANDOOOO!" She yelped as she ran as fast as her little feet could carry her towards her godfather. 
Lea hearing the commotion turned around and also ran towards her godfather, Daniel scooping her up in her arms happily. 
It didn't take long for the rest of the drivers to pile in and Ivy excitedly greeted everyone although always kept coming back to Lando's arms. 
Although you'd insisted they didn't have to bring anything you weren't surprised to see the gift table had doubled in numbers at all the gifts the drivers had bought only hoping they hadn't spent ridiculous amounts of money on a 2-year-old. 
"Happy Birthday dear Ivy! Happy Birthday to you!" Everyone finished singing as Max held Lea in his arms, you holding Lea in yours as you stood behind the birthday cake. Antoine, Louis, and Joris moved across taking pictures and videos of your family per their own request as you'd told them they didn't need to take any pictures and you'd be happy with simply their presence but they insisted. 
"Make a wish princess." Max lowered Ivy so she could blow at her candles. 
"I wish for a widdle broder!" Ivy yelled out unashamedly blowing out her candles afterwards. 
You and Max looked at each other in shock as everyone around you burst out laughing. "Uh, you're meant to say your wish in your head baby," Max told his daughter not really sure how to proceed. 
"hmm." She shrugged unbothered as she squirmed for Max to put her down. "Wando Cake!" She called out to her godfather who gladly came over to help Ivy start cutting the cake (horribly). 
After everyone got a piece and Lea sat sharing her piece with Lando on his lap you all sat and relaxed for a while, Max by your side as Lea played around with Joris and Charles whom she still had an obsession with. 
Max turned to you blinking hard three times, his little I love you gesture. "So what do you think about Ivy's wish huh?" Max asked you. 
You laughed at the thought. Max laughing with you. "If it's with you I want it all." You told him lovingly. 
"In another year?" Max dragged your chair closer to him so there was barely a gap between the both of you. 
"Sounds good to me." You smiled before Max kissed you lovingly. 
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peachhcs · 1 month ago
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we need more macklin fics and fluff bc that one was actually so cute. i need more asap 🩷
sorority formal
still debating if i should make a macklin au to add to my samy + will verse (HAHA my own fanfic verse??) but here’s some more fluff between the lovely rookie and his gf from santa clara university :) — also cleaning out my inbox so that’s why i’ve posted four times in a row LOL
also if this is bad i’m so sorry. i lowkey awkwardly switch between 2nd person and 3rd person pov sometimes so apologies for that. otherwise, i’m really starting to like writing about mack 😌 (slight allusion to sex but there’s no sex actually described just kissing)
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macklin had never been to a college sorority formal before, nor did he really understand what it was or what to expect, but he agreed to be your date nonetheless. plus, the look on your face was hard to say no to when you asked him two weeks ago.
the brunette was in his room trying to find the right suit to wear while will sat in the corner on his phone. he knew a little bit from when he was at boston, but he never found any interest in going to those frat and sorority parties, so the rookie was a bit in the dark when it came to this stuff.
will wasn’t much help either.
“i dunno man. i’ve never been to a sorority formal before. i assume it’s the same as any other formal? i’ve been to samy’s soccer banquet,” will shrugged, watching his friend try on his third suit.
“y/n said to just wear something neutral. her dress is pink i think,” macklin explained as he examined the dark navy suit in the mirror.
“i think that looks fine. navy and pink go well?” will nodded.
“i’m kind of nervous. is that bad? i don’t really know what to expect,” obviously, he didn’t want to make y/n look like a fool at her own sorority, so the boy’s nerves were at an all time high at the moment. what if he did something stupid?
“samy texted me back and she said it’s like prom but for college. there will be food and drinks and then you dance if you want. some sororities will do speeches or superlatives,” will read off the text his girlfriend just sent him.
“oh, okay. that’s not too bad then. i’ll be fine,” macklin assured himself and decided on the navy blue suit.
“yeah, it will be chill. you basically get to spend a whole night with your girlfriend,” will grinned and the brunette couldn’t help but smile at the thought. he hadn’t seen you in a few days because of your crazy busy schedules, so having this night to yourselves would be nice.
“yeah, you’re right. it will be chill and we’ll have fun,”macklin was basically saying positive affirmations to himself at this point which made will chuckle. he stood up to help his friend with his suit.
“don’t even sweat it, dude. she’s gonna love you,” the blonde assured and if will thought so, then macklin was gonna believe it.
once he was finished getting dressed, he grabbed his phone to let you know he was on his way over to your dorm. the boy rushed through the house, double checking his pockets that he had phone (check), keys (check), wallet (check), and a small bouquet he decided picking up for you because he knew you liked flowers.
“knock ‘em dead!” will called from the porch as macklin got into his car.
the brunette drove the short drive to the university. being new to driving in the states still and the nerves about tonight made his hands a bit shaky as he turned onto the drive that led to your dorm. he didn’t need to sweat this. it was you. y/n. his girlfriend. there was no reason for him to be nervous about some sorority formal.
he parked in the lot and climbed out, doing a third check that he had all of his belongings. you were waiting in the lobby for him after getting his text about being on his way. the hockey player stopped in his tracks though when he laid eyes on you.
your strapless, silky dress stopped around your ankles where he could see your pretty white heels. your hair was down like it usual was and macklin was pretty sure his pupils turned to hearts.
“hi,” you grinned when he got closer.
“hi..wow..you look..” the boy lost his words making you laugh.
“you look pretty..wow,” you complimented his navy suit.
“s-so do you. wow..i..i’m in awe,” he admitted earning a bright blush on your cheeks.
“you’re sweet. are these for me?” you noticed the bouquet wobbling in his hands. the brunette quickly flushed and handed them over to you.
“yes, sorry. they are.”
you admired the pretty pink and red petals, “thank you. these are pretty. wanna come up for a second so i can put them in water?” it wasn’t really a question because macklin was going to follow you regardless.
the two of you stepped into the elevator. mack’s nerves were now because of how beautiful you looked beside him and he didn’t know how to express it other than telling you and the building desire to kiss you. he followed you down to your dorm. your roommate grinned at him.
“hey mack,” maya waved.
“hey maya,” he waved back.
“look, he brought me flowers,” you showed maya the pretty bouquet.
“wow, brownie points for the hockey player,” she teased a bit which made him flush. he watched you find a vase and fill it with water from your bathroom. you came back out and placed the flowers into the vase.
“like them?” you asked for his opinion.
“i like them,” he nodded.
“i’ll put them by my desk for now. thank you, again,” you pecked his cheek.
“of course,” the boy was glad you liked them and he was glad he decided on getting them the other day because the smile on your face was so worth it after spending an hour at the store trying to pick them out.
“okay, we’re gonna head out now. we’ll be back later,” you called to maya who threw up a thumbs up.
“have fun! don’t get too drunk.”
you went back down the elevator and then out of the building where you latched your arm with mack’s. he rubbed your hand and leaned in to kiss your forehead.
“it’s not far from here,” you explained as you led the way.
“i’ve never been to one of these before,” the boy admitted a bit nervously.
“don’t worry, it’s so chill. you’ll get to meet some of my sorority sisters, we’ll eat, dance, drink some, and then we can leave whenever,” you explained and it eased some of mack’s nerves a bit more hearing you explain it. as much as he appreciated samy’s brief explanation, he also liked hearing it come from your lips too.
the two of you came up on one of the college bars in the area. it was already blasting music that could be heard from outside. macklin followed you inside where you were immediately greeted with security to check your ids. you both got little x’s on your hands meaning neither of you were 21. mack’s gaze flicked around the space that was dimly lit and pumping base through his bones.
“omg, y/n, hey!” a girl greeted you.
“hi jen, you look gorgeous!” you admired your friend’s dress.
“no you do! is this your boyfriend?” she turned her attention to mack.
“yes, this is macklin,” you gripped his arm again and the boy managed a tiny smile.
“nice to meet you. i’m jen, the sorority president. come on in. we have food in the back and drinks at the bar so get whatever,” jen explained.
you quickly led macklin to the back because you were starving. the boy watched you take a plate so he copied whatever you did. you laughed at his behavior.
“don’t be so nervous, mack.”
“sorry. just getting used to it all,” he said. he’d never been into a bar before because he wasn’t old enough first of all and if he was caught underage drinking he’d definitely get a mean punishment from his coach.
“it’s okay. it’s overwhelming, but i’m right here remember,” you assured and some of the worries eased hearing you say that. macklin offered a grateful smile as he followed your lead with the food and then followed you to a seat.
you sat with some other girls and their dates which got all of you quickly talking. the more you talked, the more comfortable macklin became and flushed when a few people recognized him as a hockey player. being next to you made him feel a lot more comfortable too. seeing you look so calm and content helped him do the same and by the time you were done eating, he was having a full conversation with some of the guys without you involved.
“let’s get pictures!” one girl exclaimed when she came around with her camera.
you pulled mack up. he eagerly wrapped his arm around your waist, the two of you smiling wide as the flash went off—almost blinding you guys because it was so bright and the room was so dark.
“aw, you guys look adorable,” the girl spun the camera around so you could see the preview. macklin quickly kissed your cheek.
“i love it, thanks,” you said.
you guys ventured back towards the center of the dance floor to start dancing along with the others. macklin was big on getting to dance, so he took full advantage, urging you to join his energy. you giggled at the way he bounced on his feet and pulled out his best dance moves for you.
when everyone started coming onto the floor, it got warm fast so the brunette lost his suit jacket leaving him in just his dress shirt that was almost halfway unbuttoned by now. his arms were around your waist, the two of you swaying to the beat and being in your own world together.
any anxiety the rookie felt earlier had completely disappeared being in the center of the dance floor with you. all that mattered to him was you in his arms as he spun you around.
“did i tell you how gorgeous you look?” the boy leaned in closer as he spoke over the music.
“you did, yes,” you grinned.
“well i’ll tell you again. you look gorgeous. prettiest girl here,” his words earned a bright blush on your cheeks.
“you’re too sweet, mack.”
“i’m serious, y/n/n. you’re beautiful,” he leaned in closer, still wanting that kiss he hadn’t gotten yet. you saw his request and closed the gap.
the two of you shared a sweet kiss, not caring that there were others around you or watching. your lips felt like heaven against the hockey player’s. he never wanted to let you go, but forced himself to to get some air back into his lungs.
“i could kiss you forever,” he mumbled.
“me too,” and you reconnected your lips for another quick kiss. mack’s hands wandered a bit lower towards your hips and then swiping over your ass. a giggle left your lips at his behavior.
“we should save this for the dorm,” you smiled while directing him away for now. a little pout appeared, but he understood and let you go.
the music picked up again and it had him spinning you around once more. because all of his focus was on hockey growing up, the brunette’s never had an experience of going to an end of the year dance or prom or anything, so he was glad he was getting to make this up with you right now.
as the night winded down, you and macklin decided to leave. he threw his suit jacket over your shoulders for the quick five minute walk back to your dorm. you appreciated his gesture, tugging it closer to your body to hide yourself from the semi-cold evening temperatures.
“thanks for coming tonight,” you smiled as you rode the elevator.
“of course. i had a lot of fun. thanks for bringing me,” mack returned your smile.
“i’m glad you did. better get ready for next semester,” you teased a bit and mack’s heart swelled just a little bit at the idea of coming back to your formal because that meant you wanted him enough to stick around for the next one.
he knew what you two had meant a lot to both of you, but sometimes he got in his head just a little bit wondering if he was good enough for you or not enough because he was some big shot hockey player and he knew what everyone thought about hockey players. he worried he wasn’t the one for you even though you were 100% the one for him. he knew it from the day he met you, so hearing you say that made him burst with joy.
maya wasn’t in the dorm, probably taking the hint that you guys wanted the room to yourselves. macklin was glad because he wanted to continue that kissing you guys were doing earlier.
he watched you hang up his suit jacket like you did every time he brought his suits with him and kick your shoes off. he followed suit and then didn’t waste another second bringing your lips to his again.
that urge he’s had all night only got stronger the more he kissed you. you reciprocated all of his actions and unspoken wants, pulling your hand through his pretty brunette locks and running your hand down his chest.
“i love you,” the boy mumbled between kisses.
“i love you,” you breathed.
he found your gaze for a second, wondering if this was right. wondering if you were sure about him. his thoughts were answered though when you grabbed ahold of his face to kiss him again and lead him to your bed.
needless to say, all of his anxieties were eased by the end of the night and the love he had for you had never been bigger.
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cherryrikis · 5 months ago
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ONE LESS LONELY GIRL - 012 ! the talk
PAIRING idols riki x fem reader
SYNOPSIS fans always point out the chemistry between you and riki, and it only continues to grow after you become mc’s together on music bank. but as your feelings rise, so does the tension. and people begin to notice, so you try not to let riki know how you feel. but unbeknownst to you, he feels entirely the same way.
previous <> masterlist <> next
you woke up in an unfamiliar room, completely unsure of where you were. then you felt riki’s arm wrapped around your waist, and you realized, you were at his dorm.
you smiled contently, relaxing in his grasp once you became aware of your surroundings.
“five more minutes. there’s no schedule today..” he grumbled.
“good morning, boyfriend.” you smiled, turning around to face riki so you could hug him tightly.
“good morning my lovely girlfriend.” he sighed, placing a light kiss on your forehead. “let’s stay like this.”
“actually,” heeseung said as he barged into the room, with sunghoon and jungwon following behind. “we need to have the talk.”
riki looked at them confused, immediately sitting up as he reluctantly pulled away from you.
“the talk?” “not that talk! we mean, the ‘addressing the dating scandal and how you’ll tell the staff’ talk.”
“dumbass!” sunghoon exclaimed as he slapped heeseung’s shoulder. “you should’ve said ‘a talk’, not ‘the talk’.”
and so, you and riki sat in the living room on the couch, as the three elder boys stood in front of you.
“eventually, you guys are gonna have to tell the staff. and especially the managers. they might be more upset than bangpd.” jungwon informed. “sooner or later you’re gonna have to. so i think it should be within the next week.”
"wait- i thought we agreed we wouldn't say anything to the company unless they get caught somehow in public again." said sunghoon, interrupting jungwon.
"are you seriously gonna wait for them to get in a FOURTH scandal before releasing a statement? you should just rip off the bandaid already and do it now. just get it over with." heeseung replied.
"wouldn't this be the fifth?" sunghoon interrupted once more. "no, because the third time was just announcing they were gonna be mubank mcs, and a lot of people didn't like it. that wasn't a scandal." said jungwon.
"so what were the first three times?" he asked. "mubank incident, convenience store incident, dating scandal, and then if they're caught in public again this will be the fourth." jungwon sighed, growing tired of the conversation already.
"okay! enough is enough. you guys are getting way off topic.” heeseung exclaimed. “just do it tomorrow. it’s not up to you guys. it’s what’s best for the company.” he announced, before leaving the room.
sunghoon and jungwon shrugged in agreement before walking back upstairs.
“what are we gonna do?” riki asked as his head fell onto your shoulder.
“they’re right. the sooner we get it over with, the better.”
“but shouldn’t we wait? we only started dating yesterday. it feels too soon if they release an article by next week.”
“we don’t need to share the exact date, and they don’t have to publish any information we don’t want shared.” you comforted, taking his hands into yours.
“okay.” riki nodded. “i trust you princess. i’ll follow your lead.”
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TAGLIST (italics = couldnt be tagged) @hannicorpse @luvvhaerin @chaevibes @en-verse @ren2jay @choppedballoondetective @heartheejake @imanalien143 @istglevi-gotmesimping @yndairy @eleanorheartschishiya @lonelylandofan @gweoriz @jaemified @onlyhyunjin @softpia @frecklesbrownies @riksaes @wensurr @rikifordmiami @brideslit @ant-onie @yumilovesloona @aeminju @hoonics @catecita @clampclover @rei4sunoo @addictedtohobi @rikidaze @baekxo07 @xotyla @melancholy-z @rikisgeef @jung1w0n @tocupid @onlyseung @i03jae @iheartshopping @istphanie @queenriki7 @academiq @1117promises @nctislifue @haechansbbg @rairaiblog @nabia-bia @pkjay @lixiebokie @hiekoo @r1kizerr @d-dilemma @kingofthekards @iilwji @hoonatic @woorcve @enhaz1
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v6quewrlds · 12 days ago
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PLEASE HEAR ME OUT; we saw the stream of tee listention to bmf by sza; so an imagine request could be; reader in her universe or wtv wrote that bc yk her and tee are together. and tee didn't know, and she just randomly posted new song out go enjoy, and when its released let's see tee is on stream and everyone's saying like tee reader dropped a new songs and he goes huh and so he calls her and is like did you just drop a song and she goes maybe and he goes to listen to and is like wait, is this about me and then gets really cute and excited that its about him
imagine writing a song about tee.
Tee was bored out of his mind.
The quietness of the off-season was usually a welcome reprieve from the chaos of football, but today, it felt like a prison sentence. His eyes darted from the TV playing the Notre Dame game to his phone and back again, searching for anything to fill the void. That's when he decided to set up his chair, pop his headset on, and start up his Twitch, hoping the time would fly by.
"Yo, what's good," Tee greeted his viewers with his usual enthusiasm. His screen flickered to life, displaying his face and the den behind him. The chatter in the chat grew as fans typed away, eager to interact with the star wide receiver.
Mid-game, the notifications started pouring in. "YOUR GIRL SURPRISE DROPPED," one fan exclaimed. "It's trending on Twitter," added another. Tee's heart skipped a beat. He paused the game and leaned in closer to the camera, his eyes searching the chat for more information. He hadn't heard a peep from you about this. You were in New York, tucked away upstate to finish recording your third album.
"Fuck is y'all talkin' about? My girl dropped?" Tee said into the mic, his eyes darting between the chat and his phone. He sent you a text, his thumbs moving at the speed of light. "Nobody told me nothing," he muttered under his breath. The notifications on his phone went wild, with fans sending links to Spotify and Apple Music.
After deciding you were taking too long to answer his text, he dialed your number, putting the call on speaker. It rang twice before you picked up, your voice as smooth as honey. "Hi, baby," you drawled out, playing it cool.
"Don't 'hi, baby' me," Tee said, trying to keep his own cool. "Did you really drop a new song?"
You giggled, the sound echoing through the room. "Maybe," you hummed coyly.
Tee rolled his eyes. "You playing with me?"
Your laughter grew. "I don't know. I miss you though."
Tee felt a tug at his heart. "Miss you too, but tell me about this song," he urged, trying to ignore the flutters in his chest.
"Why don't you play it and see?" you suggested, your voice dripping with mischief.
Tee's heart was racing. He pulled up Spotify on his other screen and searched for the new release. Sure enough, there it was: "BMF". He hit play and put the phone back on speaker. The song started off pleasant before the beat dropped, and your velvety voice filled the room.
Young and fine and dark and handsome The boy from Tennessee keeps bossing And I can't keep my panties from dropping
Tee's hand came down to press pause before the rest of the verse could reach his ears. "Hold on, is this about me?" He was grinning wide, a laugh bubbling up from his chest in disbelief.
Your giggles grew louder over the phone. "You're supposed to play it, listen with your ears, baby," you teased, your voice full of excitement and a hint of nerves.
Tee's smile was uncontainable as he hit play again. He leaned back into his chair, eyes on the lyrics scrolling by. The song continued as Tee continued smiling wide. He listened intently as the words painted a picture of your feelings for him. The fans in his chat went wild, posting heart-eye emojis and shouting out their love for the couple.
Know my baby packing, why I'm stuck That's why he my man
He couldn't help but press pause again, rising out of his chair to do a little victory dance. "Chat, y'all hearing this shit? This is about me!" The room was alive with the energy of his laughter and the thumping bass of the track. "Baby girl, you out here talking crazy. Goddamn!"
Your giggles turned into full-blown laughter. "I had to," you said, the sweetness in your voice contrasting with the explicit nature of the lyrics. "Just finish the song."
By the time the song wrapped up, Tee couldn't help but feel over the moon. He had heard rumors about artists writing songs for their significant others, but never thought it would happen to him. His cheeks were sore from smiling so much. He sat back down, his eyes gleaming with pride and love.
"So, what do you think?" You asked.
Tee looked at the screen, his mind racing with thoughts. "Baby girl, that shit is fire. Like, for real," he said, nodding his head in time with the beat that he decided to loop for a second play.
"You like it?" Your voice was a mix of relief and excitement.
"Like it?" Tee scoffed, his laughter still echoing in the room. "I love it, baby. You went off, baby, damn." His chest puffed out a bit, unable to contain his pride. The fans in the chat were going crazy, sending love to the couple and praising the song. Tee read some of the comments out loud, his smile growing wider with each one.
Your laugh was music to his ears. "Thank you, baby. I wanted to surprise you."
Tee leaned in closer to the mic. "Surprise? You could've just called me to tell me this. You ain't have to go and make a whole song about it," he joked, winking at the camera.
"Mute yourself for a second?" you said, your voice taking on a more sweet tone. Tee's eyes widened, and he quickly muted the stream before you could say anything more.
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traveler-at-heart · 1 year ago
Text
Game, Set, Match
Summary: Natasha Romanoff is a professional tennis player, struggling to go back to the top and win the US Open. Reluctant at first, she allows a sports journalist into her life... and a bit more.
Natasha Romanoff x Fem!R - Ya know it, fluffy af.
A/N: I love tennis and this was basically written for me. But @canvascoloredin is also a fan and thought, ok well, let's post it, maybe someone else will enjoy :)
“Thirty all”
She’s catching up, do something.
“Forty, thirty”
“Deuce”
“Come on, Natasha” her sister yells from the box.
Advantage, Romanoff.
Game, set, match. Natasha Romanoff.
Everything that happens after is a blur. Natasha feels like she just played the final, but in reality, it’s just the first round.
“Way to go, darling” her mother compliments when she’s back in the locker rooms, but Fury is quickly behind, not holding back.
“Three sets against an amateur and you won because she got nervous and got a double fault. That’s not good” 
“I beat her, didn’t I?” Natasha averts her eyes, putting on her jacket to go to the press room.
“Barely” her trainer mumbles. 
Natasha’s heart beats fast as she sits in front of all the journalists. They were warned about the questions they could ask, but still. Natasha feels all eyes on her, judging her reaction and demeanor.
“Did you worry about losing control at the start of the third set?” a man in the front row asks.
“It was the defining moment of the game, so I felt like I had to push myself harder and control the rhythm of the match. Which obviously happened”
“How was it to go back after your break? Unlike other players, you didn’t participate in any tournaments between Wimbledon and this”
“I’ve been playing tennis all my life, really, so it doesn’t feel like a big deal to me. Just because I wasn’t playing to win titles doesn’t mean I didn’t train” 
Natasha hears Fury cough and has to resist the urge to roll her eyes.
Control your temper, he’s trying to say.
Well, maybe they shouldn’t ask stupid questions.
--
You’re sitting in the middle of the press room, eyes trained on Natasha. She’s looking anywhere but you. 
I guess this means she read my column.
The conference is coming to an end, so you raise your hand and the assistant points at you.
“We have time for one more” he concedes.
“That’s enough for today” Natasha shuts it down before you can ask. 
Yeah, she definitely read the article.
Natasha can’t wait to get out of there, thanking the press before sprinting out of the room. You consider following her, but a text from your boss stops you.
Go to LA Stadium, Wanda Maximoff just bageled some poor girl.
With a bit of luck, you’ll get an exclusive with Wanda.
--
The biggest crime of Shostakov
It was a Tuesday afternoon, well into the second week of Wimbledon, when the news broke out. Alexei Shostakov, retired tennis player, was arrested for fraud and tax evasion. While in custody, it was discovered Shostakov was in possession of drugs.
The famous Red Guardian, who once had won on that very same club, was now dragged away in a patrol car, stripped of his days of glory. For people who are well versed in the history of tennis, this doesn’t come as a complete shock. Shostakov was a notorious trouble maker, often breaking rackets, ripping his shirts open and getting expelled from a total of 15 matches during the entire run of his career.
No one seemed more affected by the news than his protegee and adoptive daughter, Natasha Romanoff. The favorite to win the world’s most important Grand Slam retired amid the breaking news. As a result, Wanda Maximoff’s path to the trophy was an easy one, taking the number 1 from Romanoff while she was at it.
If her career depends on Alexei’s ability to get back on his feet, Natasha Romanoff should retire now.
In her best form, Romanoff is stealthy, precise and absolutely lethal. Her movements reminisce those of a ballerina; one that gracefully dances across the court -doesn’t matter if it’s grass, clay or hard- to deliver blow after blow of brilliance. Natasha has raw talent, pure heart and an unbreakable spirit.
The biggest crime of Shostakov, is that he’s in the way of her greatness. Maybe it’s his ego or a compulsion to attach himself to a woman who has the capacity to break every record from the Open Era.
Whatever the reason, it’s clear she’s better off without him. For those of us who love this sport, and want Natasha to be the champion she was meant to be, this is an unique opportunity to watch her finally emerge from the shadows of the overbearing man.
The proverbial ball is in Romanoff’s court. In all her brilliance, the one thing Natasha rarely does is take risks.
It’s never too late to start.
--
“We’re finishing the second day of the US Open and we have some major upsets. Carol Danvers, number 3 in the world and only American in the top ten lost to Brit Peggy Carter” you say, holding the mic and looking at the camera.
“I understand there was some excitement on the man’s singles” you hear Maria say on your earpiece and you nod.
“Queens had a face off with Brooklyn today. Bucky Barnes defeated amateur Peter Parker, but get this! They played five sets, and Peter won every tiebreak. So it seems like we have some exciting new talent”
“We’ll keep an eye on him, for sure. Thanks for the report, Y/N!”
“A pleasure as usual, Maria. Greetings to everyone back on the studio” 
“And cut” Darcy, your producer says. You remove the earpiece and hand over the mic. As you turn around, you spot Natasha training. It’s obvious you’re staring when Darcy speaks.
“You didn’t do anything wrong, you know? You wrote what a lot of people were thinking”
“Well, seems like she doesn’t wanna hear it”
“It’s fine. I mean, it would be better if we could get a quote from her or an interview but if she hates you that much we can get someone else to do it”
“Or, I could go and try to talk to her?”
“So you have a death wish!”
“Didn’t you just say I did nothing wrong?”
“Yes, but that doesn’t mean she’ll listen. I am also legally obligated to tell you that your health insurance doesn’t cover injuries caused by tennis balls. Or rackets”
“Very funny”
--
“Relax your wrist” Fury instructs once again and Natasha ignores him, as usual.
She hates the press, the interviews, the hoops she has to jump through just so she can play tennis. 
None of it is optional and she has to follow the rules, something Natasha is particularly bad at.
“If you want to move to the next round you’re gonna have to listen to me”
Does she really want to move to the next round? Is there a point to all of this? She had lost her number one ranking and people were focusing more on her private life than her career.
Fury spots you across the court and smiles. 
You nod your head towards the man and he sighs, defeated.
“Can you talk some sense into her?” 
“Can anyone?” you say and he pats you on the back, leaving the court. The sun is setting and people are going home, ready to return tomorrow to watch the next round of players. You greet Natasha but she ignores you.
“You owe me a question” you try to joke, as she keeps hitting the ball so hard you think her racket will break in half. 
“I know who you are and I’m not talking to you” 
She looks hot when she’s pissed.
You push those thoughts away.
“Natasha”
“No, you and I are not on a first name basis. Not after you wrote all that crap about me without knowing me” 
“I only spoke the truth” 
“That my career is doomed and I should retire?” she finally stops throwing balls across the court and turns to look at you.
“Oh, my God! You didn’t even read it, did you?”
“I don’t need to. I know what everyone's been saying ever since Alexei was arrested. I know he was unconventional, but he was my trainer. He was beside me through the good and bad” 
“I get it, ok? He’s your family. And your trainer. That’s never easy and I understand how it can be hard to see things objectively. But,  Natasha, you are great in spite of him, not because of him”
That makes her pause.
“Nick Fury came out of retirement to train you. That’s how talented you are!”
The redhead serves a couple of times, staying completely silent.
“I’m not talking to you” she reminds you. 
“You’re the best player out there, Natasha. And right now you’re the only thing getting in the way of your success” 
--
Morning comes and so does the next match. Natasha is looking out the window of the suite, as people come and go around the busy streets of the tennis center.
Fury steps in, immediately aware of her nervous energy. If he asks if she’s ready, she’ll probably rip his head off. So, talking about something different might be the way to go.
“Her father was also a sports journalist,” he says, pouring himself a glass of orange juice.
“Who?” 
“Y/N. Richard was a single parent, so he’d always bring her to the games, even as a baby. She behaved better than most people too” 
“Is he retired?” 
“Nope. Cancer. Four years ago” Fury sits in front of Natasha. “Didn’t expect her to follow his steps, but that girl really knows sports. She’s working with the local station, and also writes for Sports Illustrated”
“What are you trying to say?”
“Never hurts to have a couple of friends around,” he says, sipping from his glass.
“I’m not good at making friends” Natasha looks away.
“Yeah, I know. You’re good at tennis, so…” the man checks his watch and stands up. “Let’s kick some ass”
--
Natasha has to face Kate Bishop, currently ranked 24. Her game is the opposite of aggressive, but she’s famous for her impeccable aim. Natasha has to control the game from the start if she wants to win.
She serves first, and as she bounces the ball, preparing her stance, Fury’s words echo in her head. All the advice he has given her for the past months, advice that she has consistently ignored.
Then, as she throws the ball, her eyes meet yours. You’re sitting in the front row, leaning forward. 
In a split second, she makes a decision.
Natasha is ready to take risks.
She aims for the corner of the service box, hoping it will fall inside. Kate lunges forward, shocked at the speed of the ball.
“Ace” the umpire announces. “Fifteen love” 
Natasha sees you clapping and can hear Fury shouting “That’s it, you can do this, Romanoff”
And boy, does she deliver. Kate is running across the court. Natasha’s unforced errors are incredibly low. While the crowd usually loves long games, the redhead is a legend and they’re excited to see her prowess first hand. 
The game ends in 47 minutes, 6-3, 6-2.
Kate approaches the net and shakes Natasha’s hand.
“That was… incredible, Romanoff”
“Thank you, Kate” 
The kind words and the genuine admiration make Natasha relax instantly.
Of course, the crowd goes wild as the redhead lifts her arms, clapping and waving. 
She’s in such a good mood that she decides she’ll finally take your question. But as she enters the press room, you’re nowhere to be found. 
Still, she chats and even jokes around with the journalists present.
Once again, the entire family celebrates as if Natasha had already won the Grand Slam.
“Seestra, the crowd was going craaaazy, it was like a Taylor Swift concert” Yelena tells her excitedly as they eat. Natasha’s starving, so nervous about today that she didn’t even have breakfast.
They keep chatting, talking about strategy for the next game and wondering who will go against Natasha next. 
“Natalia, your father wants to talk to you” Melina interrupts, holding her phone.
“Why?” Natasha snaps, going back to her stoic self.
“He wants to congratulate you,” the woman insists.
“I’m not in the mood. Excuse me” she stands up, losing her appetite.
Out on the terrace, she watches people passing by, trying to think of anything else but Alexei.
Your words come back to her, and she starts to believe them.
You are great in spite of him.
“Hey, there you are!” you shout from the bottom of the stairs, waving. “Do you have a sec?”
Natasha nods, going down. 
“First of all, wow. Brava”
“You wanted something?” she rolls her eyes, but you notice she blushes lightly.
It’s quite the view, Natasha’s body covered in sweat from the physical exertion, her sculpted arms in full display.
That tennis outfit looks really good on her.
“Oh.. yeah. Do you, uh, have time to meet a fan? She’s a little girl and you’re her favorite player”
“Of course” 
“Awesome, come with me!” you take her by the hand.
Natasha tries to ignore the tingling feeling she gets as she’s dragged around the center. Some people recognise her, but you’re walking fast and they don’t have the chance to stop her for a picture.
“Hey, Ava!” you greet the little girl, who’s holding a big tennis ball and a black marker. “Natasha, meet Ava. She’s your number one fan” 
“Hi,” the girl says shyly. She’s about nine, her mother standing next to her and smiling.
“Hi, Ava. It’s so nice to meet you” Natasha greets. “How are you liking the tournament so far?” 
“Uh, it was great, and you were so awesome today!”
“Thank you, I really appreciate it. Would you like me to sign that?”
“Yes, please!” her arms shoot forward, anxiously. 
“What other players would you like to meet?” Natasha says, as she signs the ball.
“Maybe Peter Parker… We met Carol Danvers, Bucky Barnes and also, Wanda”
Yeah, Natasha didn’t miss the way Maximoff signed the ball. 
From the number 1 player to the number 1 fan. 
So pretentious.
“That’s nice,” Natasha says, handing the ball back.
“Alright, let’s take a picture” you pull out your phone. Natasha kneels to be closer to Ava, and then places her tennis hat on the girl’s head.
“You can have it” Natasha smiles and is surprised when she gets a very enthusiastic hug. Her mother has to practically drag her away from where you’re standing, Ava turning around every couple of steps to wave at Natasha.
“Thank you, Nat,” you say, smiling.
“It’s not a problem. I didn’t see you in today’s press conference”
“That’s because it’s my day off” you say, surprised that she noticed your absence.
“What about that thing?” she points at the badge hanging from your neck that reads Press.
“That’s how I get in for free, duh” 
“Sneaky” 
“I can be” you shrug your shoulders and then turn back to your phone. “Hey, so can I send this to your PR team for them to post it?” 
“You don’t have to” 
“Fine, I’ll post it on my feed and tag you. Alright, gotta go. Have to cheer for Bucky” you say, taking her hand one last time. “Once again, thank you. And congrats. You were fantastic”
“I owe you a question” she calls when you’re walking away.
“I’m saving it for when you win the championship” you wink and she smiles, scratching the side of her neck nervously.
Later that day, her phone is blasting with notifications.
“Almost one million likes, Natasha” Yelena shows her the picture you uploaded of her and Ava.
“Is that good or bad?” the redhead shrugs her shoulders and her sister rolls her eyes.
“You’re so uncool!” 
However, she knows enough about Instagram to find your profile, going through your feed. Most of the pictures are from different games, some hangout with friends, the most frequent ones being Barnes and a pro that plays for the Yankees, Sam Wilson.
She’s about to close the app when two things that are equally horrible happen.
First, she likes one of your pictures from two years ago.
Second, she gets a message.
OfficialWandaMaximoff: Congrats on your win today <3
--
Bucky just lost the second set and is down on the third one. You keep refreshing the feed as you wait next to other journalists for Wanda Maximoff. 
Of course she’s in the quarter finals, that’s hardly a shock. Everyone’s waiting for her to face Natasha in the finals. When it happens, you’re obviously rooting for Nat.
Speaking of which…
@SportsBrooklyn: Good luck tomorrow! 
@NatashaROfficial followed you back
@NatashaROfficial: Do you only use Instagram or can you text like a normal person?
@SportsBrooklyn: Oh, right, text you to the number I don’t have!
Wanda walks in that moment and you lock your phone. Her auburn hair is tied in a high ponytail, and she changed to her signature red windbreaker and black pants.
You’re busy taking notes when your phone pings again. To your surprise, Natasha actually gave you her phone number.
@NatashaROfficial: If you share it with anyone else I’ll choke you
@SportsBrooklyn: Kinky ;)
The press conference ends and you practically sprint out to see if you can catch the rest of Bucky’s game.
You have to settle for the screens on the Champions Bar, comforted by the fact that Bucky seems to be ahead on the third set. As soon as he wins it, you stand up, knowing the break is the perfect time to slip into the player’s box.
“I’m so sorry” you say as you crash into none other than Wanda Maximoff. She grabs your arm to steady herself, smiling to ease you.
“That’s alright. You’re in a hurry?” she says, turning at the screen. 
“A bit, yeah” 
“I wish someone as cute as you was rooting for me” she smiles, placing a strand of hair behind her ear. She’s flirting? Oh boy. “I noticed you looking at your phone during the press conference. Barnes is a lucky guy” 
“Oh, we’re not…” 
“Here I was thinking he was smarter than that”
There’s a sense of urgency to go before the break is over, but you’re also completely confused. Why is Wanda Maximoff taking an interest in a local reporter? You’re vaguely aware that her eyes drift somewhere behind you from time to time, but before you can turn and have a look, she pulls your press badge and smiles.
“If you ever want an exclusive, just let me know, Y/N…” she reads the name from your press badge and walks away, leaving you completely confused.
--
Natasha watches the entire interaction from her small table. She needed a break so she decided to put on a hat and glasses, to get a drink without being recognised.
Wanda was all over you, giggling and looking Natasha’s way as much as she could, to let her know this was entirely to upset her.
All Natasha wanted to do was stand up and take you away from Wanda. You were too good for someone like Maximoff.
Wanda thought she was making Natasha jealous. 
She was right, but not in the way she would have wanted to.
--
“Maybe it’s time I retire” 
“You’re 28” 
“Might as well be 100 in tennis years” 
“Buck” you nudge him.
You’re looking out the Brooklyn Bridge, trying to cheer up your best friend after losing in the round of 16.
“You won the Australian Open this year” 
“Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. See? I’m senile” he mumbles, still grumpy.
“You did great, and you’re still in the top five, Grumpa. Ha! See what I did there?” he rolls his eyes and you smile, pulling him back to the street. “Come on, Sam is waiting for us to have some lunch” 
“Ok, but it’s on you because I’ll be broke once I retire” 
“Yeah, yeah” you roll your eyes, looping your arms together and dragging him to your favorite dinner. Sam’s already there, chatting around with everyone that recognises him.
All eyes turn to you as he stands up and practically shouts.
“How’s my favorite girl?” Sam greets you and then slaps Bucky’s shoulder. “Don’t make that face, man. You won the aussie one”
“That’s what I told him” 
Bucky takes his jacket off and orders a beer as soon as the waiter approaches you; even if it’s only noon, you let it slide.
You get a text from Darcy, asking if you’re watching the game.
Your mind instantly goes to Natasha. Did she lose? No, that can’t be. She was playing against Van Dyne, who was only there because of a wild card. You turn to one of the screens and ask the waiter to change the channel. 
“She’s winning” you say, still not understanding what Darcy meant.
“Why does she look so upset, then?” Sam points out.
Natasha is arguing with the umpire. You recognise him immediately.
“I hate that guy,” Bucky says, echoing your thoughts.
“Jarvis… something. Stone?” 
“Yeah, a total asshole. Wouldn’t give me a point I clearly won on Wimbledon because the other player was also a Brit” 
The argument ends and she keeps playing. Her forehand is killer today.
“Wow” Bucky says at the same time as you gasp.
“Man, I feel so dumb right now” Sam is looking between both of you, not knowing what caused your reaction.
“Just now? It’s more like, always” Bucky teases and Sam glares. He rolls his eyes and points at the screen. “Van Dyne hit after a double bounce. That’s not allowed. But Stone clearly doesn’t give a shit. He’s giving her the point”
“Natasha stopped playing because she saw it. He claims he didn’t so in his mind, she lost this one” you keep explaining.
“If Hope had a little bit of integrity, she’d concede the point or play it again”
“Well, she’s losing so she’ll take all the help she can get” you say. 
Natasha’s rage fuels her after this and she ends up winning, the second set a devastating 6-0.
However, the two men on the screen are being unsurprisingly critical of her. Your stomach turns when you hear the words “emotional” and “aggressive” thrown around.
Even if it’s a long shot, you try calling her. Phone’s off.
If you’re lucky, you’ll manage to see her once you get back to the stadium.
--
“Turn it off,” Natasha grumbles. Fury is watching the news in the living room. 
“I wanna see the highlights of other players. Prepare for what’s coming next. If you don’t like it, leave the room” he says with a dismissive wave of his hand.
After the game, Natasha did the mandatory press conference, went back to the lockers, destroyed two rackets, took a shower and then looked out the window for the better part of the day. 
She wasn’t in the mood to do anything and she didn’t want to turn on her phone. The temptation to read what the press and public had to say about her after today’s argument with the umpire was too big.
“Y/N, how are things at the US Open?” Maria Hill says. The screen splits, your image appearing on the right side.
“Exciting names on both sides for the semis. We have Thor against Banner, and T'Challa faces Namor for a spot in the semis. As for the ladies, Maximoff breezed through the match against Jean Gray”
“Well, I understand Romanoff didn’t have it so easy,” Maria says. 
From her seat, Natasha holds her breath. Yelena walks in at that exact moment, watching her sister closely.
“You know, I find it unbelievable that an umpire at the US Open could make such a poor call, not once but twice. First, with the hindrance call against Natasha and then by completely ignoring the double bounce before Van Dyne hit the ball” you say, clearly upset. “We’ve seen time and time again that some umpires are not up to the standards set by Grand Slams. And to my fellow journalists who like to throw around words like emotional, better save that energy for the men that smash their rackets just because they lost a point. As we all saw, Romanoff was in her right to demand fairness and she did it with the utmost respect” 
“Yes, I completely agree with you” Maria nods, clearly regretting even asking about it. “Well, let us chat tomorrow after we have the final for the men” 
“Of course, Maria,” you nod.
Natasha tries really hard, but she can’t help but smile at your words.
Yelena arches her eyebrows.
Well, this is interesting.
--
Natasha refuses to leave her room, arguing she’s not hungry. Melina, Yelena and Fury leave her alone, but the sudden silence becomes too much. There’s no noise to stop her thoughts from spiraling.
With a sigh, she turns on her phone. Two messages come through.
Y/N: Sorry about today. That umpire sucks :( 
Y/N: Bucky hates him too
Next thing she sees is a picture of Bucky and you holding your middle fingers to the screen with Jarvis’ face. Natasha chuckles at that.
She also zooms in, checking that your other hand is very close to Bucky’s. She feels a pang of jealousy that is interrupted by a knock on the door.
“Room service” a strange voice says.
“I didn’t order any..:” she says, but finds you smiling on the other side of the door.
“Gotcha” 
“What are you doing here?” the redhead can’t help but smile. You’re wearing a black leather jacket, a white tee and skin tight jeans. She’s torn between admiring your figure and paying attention to what you say next.
“Little bird told me you were very upset and you might need a distraction” 
“I’m gonna kill Fury” 
“Not Nick. Your sister. And are we gonna find something to eat by standing here or…?”
“I’m not hungry” 
“We’re going, Natasha. Go get changed” you push past her, tired of waiting around in the hallway. She’s taken aback by your forwardness. Her mother and sister would usually let her get away with anything.
“Where are we going?” she asks, hoping you won’t go all the way to her room and pick an outfit for her.
“Something casual will do” 
She changes as fast as she can, taking her phone and some money with her. You nod approvingly and then open the door, peeking around the hallway.
“This little field trip is not Fury approved so let’s be discreet about it” you inform her, taking her hand to lead the way to the elevator.
“Oh, yeah, this is super discreet” Natasha complains as you lead her to an electrical carriage. 
“Have a little fun, why don’t you?” you climb up, offering your hand. She takes and sits next to you. Natasha resists the urge to put a strand of hair behind your ear as you lean forward to give the address.
You feel her eyes on you, so you turn back, smiling and blushing lightly. 
It’s a short ride, and soon after you enter a small diner.
“Hey, Y/N” the owner greets you. “My, this must be a special occasion” she leans towards Natasha and whispers. “She’s never brought a girl over”
“Ok, Pat! Natasha is just a friend” you clarify, blushing in the process. Natasha laughs at you.
“Why? She’s pretty. You need to start dating” Pat says, leaving two menus.
“Don’t bother” you stop Natasha as she starts reading it. “She’ll bring us whatever she wants. But it will be worth it, I promise”
“Do you come here often?”
“My dad couldn’t cook if his life depended on it. But he was always good at finding the best spots to eat. So we came here all the time during the US Open and then later when Bucky started training”
Natasha nods and looks away. 
“So, you’re not dating Barnes either?” she says, looking anywhere but you. It’s embarrassing how much she cares.
“Uh.. no. He’s like a brother to me. His parents worked a lot so he’d tag along to games with us, and we grew up together” you wait until she turns to look at you. “Can I ask now?”
“Is this off the record?”
“Do you see my press badge anywhere?”
“One never knows with you people”
“Ouch, Natasha” the redhead laughs but you ask anyway. “Are you dating anyone? You’ve never been public about it”
“I’m not, no. I just don’t think I’d be able to find the balance. Between tennis and a partner. And my public and private life”
“Fair enough” you say. Pat approaches with milkshakes, cheeseburgers and fries.
“I hope you girls are hungry”
“Starving” 
“Fury’s gonna kill me” Natasha sighs, but then dips a fry in the milkshake and practically moans at the taste.
Your mouth is hanging wide open, and your teeth clash at how fast you shut it when Natasha turns to you.
“You’re right, this is worth it”
The rest of the night is spent eating and talking about everything but tennis. You learn that Natasha likes to bake in her free time, and that Yelena is taking a sabbatical before moving to New York to study at NYU.
After finishing your food, you both agree that walking back will be the best idea. 
“I’m so full” you complain as you enter through the back, too scared to be caught by Fury. Natasha walks in the opposite direction of the foyer. “Uh, what are you doing? I don’t want your coach all over my ass if you’re missing” 
“Have a little fun, why don’t you?” she echoes your words from before and you have no choice but to follow her. You end up on a tennis court, balls scattered around the floor.
“Do you practice here?”
“If I can’t sleep” Natasha picks up a ball and a racket and hands it to you.
“Can I help you?”
“Play with me”
“I can’t even serve, Natasha”
“Well, would you like to learn?” she says with a smirk and you can’t resist it.
“Fine. But after that, you go back to your room”
“Stance first” Natasha instructs. She corrects your posture and movements a couple of times, inching closer until she’s whispering instructions in your ear. The last thing she does is put her hands over yours to make sure your grip is tight. “Show me what you got”
She steps away and you miss her presence instantly. Trying to remember everything she told you, you toss the ball in the air and swing a little too hard. You trip over your own feet, but Natasha moves forward and catches you before you fall.
“You ok?” she says and you nod.
“How did I do, coach?” you steady yourself, holding her close to you. Your eyes travel to her lips, and you’re both out of breath from laughing.
Neither one can tell who leans first, but the fact is that you do and you discover, with great pleasure and no surprise, that Natasha is an excellent kisser. Her lips are soft against yours and she pulls you closer by your waist.
“Is this a new way of interviewing people, Y/L/N?” 
Oh, shit.
You break apart and turn to Fury, who looks very much not impressed.
“The only cardio you’re allowed to do until this slam is over is at the gym, Romanoff. Back to your room, now” 
“I’m not a little girl you can boss around,” Natasha protests.
“Come on, you should rest. We’ll talk later” you don’t want her to start arguing with Fury, not now that she’s finally listening to him. Natasha turns to you and nods, squeezing your hand one last time before going back to the hotel.
“I don’t want her distracted,” Fury says and you nod. 
“I wasn’t trying to… I won’t get in her way, Nick. I want her to win”
“Glad we understand each other. Now go home” 
He turns to leave and you wait for a little bit, trying to calm down after a mindblowing kiss. As you’re about to leave, you spot a yellow bracelet on the ground. You’ve seen Natasha wearing one before, but you’re too scared of Fury to go back now.
Tomorrow will be a new day for all of you.
--
“Keep your leg behind the ball” Fury instructs. Natasha has been listening to every single thing he says.
Yes, she’s nervous about the semis. And Fury’s the only one that can understand the feeling or help her play better.
“I want you focused,” he says as she walks to dry her hands.
“I am”
“You know what I mean” he says and as if on cue, you walk up to the court, waving. Natasha places the racket down and approaches you. “Practice isn’t over, Romanoff!”
“Five minutes” she asks, meeting you on the edge of the court.
“Hi”
“Hi” she says back. Her eyes go down to your lips and your heart flutters.
“Uh, you left… I think this is yours” you remember to speak, showing the yellow bracelet.
“Yes, thank you. Do you mind?” Natasha extends her hand and you put it around her wrist. “Yelena gave it to me before my first match. It’s my lucky charm”
“Well, good thing I saw it”
“Maybe you’ll be my next lucky charm”
“Oh? Am I supposed to be at every game from now on?” you smile, nodding when you’re done with the bracelet.
“I really wanna kiss you” Natasha blurts out and you blush. “But…”
“There are people watching and Fury doesn’t look happy either”
“He never does. Can I call you later?”
“Yes, you definitely can”
You want to kiss her so bad, damn it.
“Come on, go back, before Fury kicks me out of the court”
Natasha nods, squeezing your hand gently.
The way Natasha looks at you makes you all kinds of flustered, so you leave in a hurry before your desire takes over and you end up kissing her in front of all these people.
Once again, you run into Wanda Maximoff, only this time she doesn’t smile at all.
“She’s quite the player, right?” she says with a cold voice, her accent a bit thicker.
“Uh- yes. Natasha is a very talented pro”
“Oh, that’s not what I meant” she takes a step forward and looks you up and down. “Natasha likes to fuck around. But she always comes back to me”
“You’re… together?” your heart drops. Natasha wouldn’t lie to you about this.
Would she?
“Look, of course she wants to get distracted and she’ll use anyone that is dumb enough to fall for it. But don’t forget, she and I have history. And that’s stronger than whatever it is you think you have with Natasha”
No one is around to save you from this horrible conversation. You don’t want to argue with Wanda, because you’re still a journalist and it’s your job to be on the players’ good side.
But the reckless part of you wants to tell her to fuck off.
You sigh and look down. Wanda takes this as a sign of defeat and smiles, leaving you standing there.
It takes a minute for you to snap out of it, and you look around, desperate to walk away from everything that just happened.
“You’re seriously telling me you know nothing?” you ask Bucky for the tenth time.
“I don’t pay attention to rumors” he shrugs his shoulders, and you roll your eyes at him.
He’s sitting on your couch, the movie long forgotten. You nudge him with your foot and glare.
“Your best friend is a journalist, you should know better. You’re my insider into this crap”
“I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m just not on the loop of who dates who on the women’s side. But I am not surprised Wanda scared you. Heard she can be batshit crazy”
“She didn’t scare me” you mumble. The both of you sit in silence for a while, until your phones ping simultaneuosly.
Thankfully, it’s not Nat. Right now, you don’t even know what to say to her.
“Sam. Probably to brag about his date in that fancy restaurant” Bucky tells you, but his eyes widen as he reads the message. “Wow. You need to look at this”
He hands you the phone and you read the conversation. It’s your group chat and Sam just sent a picture of Jarvis Stone, who is having dinner with none other than Wanda Maximoff.
“What the actual fu…”
“So that’s why he was being a dick to Natasha” Bucky says. “You’re not telling her about this, are you?”
“No, of course not. She has the semis tomorrow and I don’t want to distract her”
You look at your phone and press send before you chicken out.
Y/N: Can we talk tomorrow?
YBelova: Sure
You’re waiting by the entrance to Arthur Ashe, looking around.  Even if Maximoff’s match is later, you are still dreading to spot Wanda.
“Hey” Yelena says and you jump like a coward. “Wow, relax, it’s me”
“I’m sorry to be meeting you like this. I didn’t want to bother Natasha, especially today… she has enough on her plate”
“It’s ok, you can trust me”
“I know I can… it’s not easy to ask this, but do you know if Wanda and Natasha had a… thing? Like a relationship”
“Are you asking as a journalist?” the blonde says, clearly on edge.
“No, it’s not like that! Natasha and I… we kissed. And then Wanda told me yesterday that Natasha is just fooling around because she always comes back to her… and that’s weird but then a friend sent me this. It’s from last night”
“That’s the umpire that was a jerk to Tasha” Yelena takes your phone, looking at it in desbelief. “That bitch is still pulling this shit”
“If it had been only about us, I would have waited until Natasha finished her match. But it seems to me, like Wanda is trying to play dirty here”
Yelena sighs and hands the phone back. She looks around and steps closer, lowering her voice.
“Yes, they dated. Kept it a secret. It was on and off, especially when they were playing against each other. Wanda didn’t like to lose and then, after a while, she began to mess around with Nat. She would have a fight with her before a big match, even if they weren’t playing each other. Made Natasha lose her cool and struggle. They really haven’t spoken since the AO”
“What do we do? I don’t want her to mess with Natasha. I won’t let Wanda get in her way”
“I’ll speak to Fury about this. He knows everything. I’ll let you know what he says”
“Didn’t know you two were friends now”
A voice calls from behind you.
“Seestra, hey!” Yelena steps forward to give you time to recover. “Y/N was just telling me about her time at NYU”
“Is that so?” the redhead looks between you two and you nod.
She stills makes you nervous and flustered.
“Alright, my presence is no longer required” Yelena complains, but still gives you a meaningful look as she walks away.
“I have to warm up, will you stay for the game?” she asks, stepping closer.
“Yes, of course I will. I’ll be screaming your name” you blurt out and then blush. “I mean, rooting for you. Didn’t mean it to sound like that”
“Sounds good to me” she says, coming closer. “Can I have a good luck kiss?”
You look at her smile, her beautiful green eyes. Think about all the times she’s been kind and funny and brave. And you also think about how someone played with her heart just for a stupid title.
So you nod and lean forward, kissing her gently.
Natasha deserves to win, not only because she’s the better player. She’s the better person.
“Go win this thing” you say against her lips and she smiles, pecking your lips one last time.
Natasha’s win is not a surprise to you, considering the level of her recent games. You still have to stick around for the Maximoff match, opting to stay far away from the press room once she wins.
So, it’s down to the two of them in the final.
You’ve never wished for Natasha to win something so much until today.
Work keeps you busy enough. Both of the men’s semis take a combined time of eight hours and you end up completely exhausted, seriously considering just sleeping in one of the locker rooms.
You haven’t heard from Natasha but it’s understandable. She’s playing for the championship tomorrow, and knowing Fury, he will be preparing her in every way possible.
As you get a cup of coffee from one of the last stands open, your phone pings again.
Natasha: Are you still here?
Y/N: Yes :(
Natasha: Meet me in court 17?
Y/N: Yes :)
When you finally get there, you find Natasha serving a couple of times, wearing a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt.
“Is Fury ok with you staying up so late?”
“I did everything he said today. I think I deserve this one thing” she smiles, walking towards you. “You look a bit tired”
“Jeez, thanks”
“I didn’t mean it like that. Ugh, Yelena is right, I have no game off court”
You laugh at that, taking her hands in yours.
“It’s fine, I was just teasing you” you say, looking as her eyes drift towards your lips. You both lean forward, sharing a kiss.
“Thank you” Natasha says.
“Uh, you’re welcome?”
“I don’t mean the kiss, no. Thank you for telling Yelena that thing about… Wanda”
“Oh”
Natasha walks with you to one of the chairs and you sit together.
“I haven’t spoken to her in months. And I don’t want to be with her. I need you to know that”
“But still… you said you’re not sure you want a relationship, right? It would be too much trouble”
“I think it might be worth the effort for you” she confesses and you smile.
“You do have game”
“I do?”
“Tiny bit. We’ll work on it”
She laughs, and you sit in silence for a moment.
“I made my debut in this court”
“I know”
“How…?”
You sigh. Since you’re sharing stories…
“After my dad died, I kinda took distance from the things we did together. That included all kinds of sports. It was a painful reminder. And then, as the USO was starting, I realised he had already bought our tickets. So I came here, walked around a bit. And then I saw you”
Natasha smiles, squeezing your hand.
“Your hair was shorter, and you were wearing a weird orange top with green shorts” you frown as you remember how awful it looked.
“My mom chose it for me!” the redhead buries her face in her hands and you laugh. You take them in yours as you continue the story.
“You were amazing that day. Controlled, precise… I forgot for a little while about how sad I was. And after you won, I came back everyday to watch you play”
“Thank you for telling me that. I wish I could have known your father”
“I would have liked that too”
There’s silence as you both think about your own journies, the things that brought you to this moment.
“Come on, we should go. You need your rest” you stand up, offering your hand to Natasha. She thinks for a moment before taking it, but instead of standing up she pulls you down until you’re sitting on her lap, your legs around her.
“Nat?” you gulp, blushing at how close you are.
“Tell me to stop and I’ll stop” she whispers, kissing your neck and squeezing your ass.
“Holy shit, no, don’t stop” you plead, tangling your fingers in her red hair.
“Locker room?”
“Lead the way” you kiss her frantically, hoping no one sees you.
Once you arrive there, Natasha smiles and your heart stops for a second.
“Ready to scream my name?”
There’s warmth. And a nice pressure. Some tingling on your back. Like a soft touch.
You open your eyes in an unknown room, trying to remember where you are. As you turn around you find Natasha fast asleep, her arm around your middle.
“Nat?” you call for her, hoping no one walks in any time soon.
“Five more minutes” she mumbles against your skin.
“Nat, wake up” you plead.
As it turns out, she only reacts when Yelena kicks the door, walking in on you naked under the sheets.
“Happy finals day seestra—-ah! Naked”
“Yelena what is wrong?” to your horror, Melina joins her daughter. “Oh, you two lovebirds!”
“WHY DOESNT ANYONE KNOCK HERE” Natasha screams, putting the sheets above her head.
“Sorry”  Melina says, dragging away Yelena.
“Yeah, sorry” Yelena echoes, sounding anything but.
As you both get dressed, the memories of last night come back to you.
After your rendezvous -and almost getting caught by security- you decided it would be better to continue elsewhere. You blush as images of Natasha moaning, kissing and pleasuring you also come back.
“Hey” she approaches you as you walk to the door. “You ok? You look a little…”
“Flustered?” you say, trying to hide your blush.
“Well, yes. I’m sorry about them walking in”
“Last night was… amazing”
“Yeah?” she circles your waist with her hands and pulls you closer. “How amazing?”
“Like winning all Grand Slams in the same year kind of amazing” your hands go around her neck and you pull her for a kiss.
“Wow, that’s big talk” Natasha comments agains your lips. And as she’s about to kiss you, Fury walks in.
“Romanoff! What did I tell you about that cardio”
“For the love of God, knock!” Natasha says, defeated.
“Don’t worry, Fury, I promise she was laying down for the most part” you wink at the man.
“Stay for breakfast” Melina invites as she’s setting the suite’s table with all the room service.
“This has been sufficiently awkward, thank you. And I also imagine you have stuff to do”
“You need to stay hydrated. How much liquid did you lose?” Fury says, going around the kitchen like a headless chicken.
“Fury, I haven’t seen her this relaxed in months. My sister will be fine” Yelena comments.
“Are you coming to the game?”
“Of course. I’m on press duty”
“Come to the player’s box” Melina says.
“Would that be wise?” you ask and everyone shares a look. “What I mean is, we want to make Wanda think her plan worked, right? If she sees me there she’ll know we are on to her”
“I don’t care what she thinks. I want you there” Natasha takes your hand and you smile.
“Alright. I’ll be there. See you later” you kiss her cheek and smile.
“Byeee” Melina and Yelena say, and you realise that Natasha will have to deal with their questions.
Well, if she can deal with the press, she can deal with her family.
The day goes by in a blur, and as the match approaches, you feel more anxious. God, how does Natasha do this? If it were you with the world watching, you’d probably break down the minute you step into the court.
“Hello there” Yelena greets as you meet at the player’s entrance of Arthur Ashe.  “Ever been here?”
“Just once, with Bucky”
It’s hard to forget the luxurious facilities where players can get food, special gifts, some physio or workout before their matches.
“He won last year, right?”
“Yes” you smile at the memory. “How is Natasha doing?”
“She’s done with warmup, she had something light to eat and she seems ready. She’s also been smiling like an idiot all day, even if Fury kept her away from her phone”
“I want her to win, so whatever it takes” you smile at the blonde, and follow her to the lounge, where Natasha is waiting with Melina. The redhead smiles as soon as she spots you and you kiss her on the cheek.
“How do you feel?”
“Like a complete wreck”
“You got this. Remember she prefers short games, she also doesn’t like to volley or come close to the net. And people say her forehand is killer but she goes too far behind her back, so use it against her”
“Y/N?” she interrupts your rambling. “All of that is fine advice, but I already have Nick on my back 24/7”
“Right, sorry”
“You know what he doesn’t provide?”
“Hm?”
“Good luck kisses”
“That’s right, it’s above my paygrade” Fury says. “Say your goodbyes now”
Melina and Yelena hug her, Fury squeezes her shoulder and then they give you some space.
“Go win this thing” you say, leaning forward and kissing her softly.
Natasha leans her forehead against yours and smiles.
She’s ready.
Natasha comes out first, and the crowd goes wild.
Wanda is close behind her; you catch her staring at you, clearly shocked that you’re next to Nat’s family.
“Who’s losing focus now?” Yelena says with a cheerful voice and you can’t help but smile.
The game begins and it is very clear that Natasha is playing aggressively. She has an ace on every game and there are hardly any break points for Wanda. It’s been 30 minutes and the score is 5-2.
“She’s cooked,” Fury says, looking at Wanda. You shake your head.
“Maximoff has an insane record after losing the first set, you know that”
And in fact, she does lose the first set. As always, the crowd loves to cheer on the underdog, so they go wild when Wanda wins the first two games of the second set.
“Come on, Tasha” you scream, and she looks your way, smiling. In no time, they’re tied.
“What are the odds on a tiebreak?” Yelena asks.
“It can go either way” you sigh, confirming that it will happen as they reach 6-6.
Natasha is playing fast and hard, giving no time for Wanda to recover.
But as she serves for the match, Wanda challenges the call in the most disruptive way possible.
It was in, but since Nat stopped playing the point goes to Wanda.
“That’s bullshit” Yelena says under her breath and you nod.
Sure enough, Natasha zones out and goes from match point to losing the second set.
“Dear Lord” Fury says, trying to keep a neutral expression.
“Maximoff looks exhausted, Nick. Natasha is doing great. She didn’t give away the second set. She’ll do this”
The third set begins, the first four games a close call. Deuce is called when they’re tied at 2, and you know that whoever wins this point will end up winning the match.
Every time Wanda has an advantage, Natasha comes back and breaks. Even when the Sokovian is serving, it doesn’t stop Natasha from pulling her back to 40-40. The Russian is a wall, and Wanda seems to lose hope as time passes.
And then, it happens.
Wanda has a double fault that gives Natasha the advantage. Followed by a double fault that gives her a break.
“Yes” Fury claps, trying to keep it together.
As the score approaches 5, your heart beats faster. Once again, 5-2.
Natasha serving for the match.
An ace.
The crowd goes wild.
The second ball goes out of the court when Wanda hits it.
Then, a double fault.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
It’s 30-15 and then 30-30. All Natasha needs are two more points to win.
She searches for your face in the crowd and you smile, nodding.
“You’re going to win” you say and she smiles.
Another ace.
The screens show the “championship point” sign.
Wanda doesn’t make it easy for her. She’s like a wounded animal that has nothing to lose, so she runs, she answers every throw with a groan, she comes to the net.
But when Natasha does her signature dropshot, Wanda tries to run, reaches too late and the ball bounces one, two, three times.
“Game, set, match, Romanoff”
“Fuck, YEEES” Yelena screams, standing up and cheering.
It’s all a blur, Natasha falling to the ground and covering her face. Walking to the net to shake Wanda’s hand, and then  the umpire’s.
After, she walks among the crowd, trying to reach her box. Yelena is the first to jump, their mother hugging them both and crying.
Fury looks like he’s about to cry as Natasha hugs him. You’re certainly crying happy tears as you watch them.
And then, she walks past him and picks you up from the ground, kissing you in front of the entire stadium.
“Congrats, Nat” you say against her lips.
“I’ll be right back” she promises when the security guard asks her to come back for the ceremony.
“You owe me a question”
“Save it for the next championship” she says against your lips and you kiss again, in spite of the guard’s insistence and with the crowd cheering you on.
It’s been six more slam titles, two years of tours around the world.
Natasha still owes you a question.
You’re saving it for a time when you’re both ready, and you’ll ask her to marry you.
477 notes · View notes
blitzwhore · 15 days ago
Note
wait, i don't understand, can u please if u want explain why they scrapped the "Stolitz Montage" song?
Yeah, I can explain! I actually have a lot of thoughts about these songs.
For context, at the beginning of Sinsmas, a song called Day By Day plays in the background while Blitz and Stolas run errands. Originally, a different song (untitled, so Sam Haft—the composer—unofficially called it Stolitz Montage) was going to play during these scenes, but they ended up scrapping it. I mentioned in the tags of a different post that I understood why they'd made this decision.
If you don't want to keep reading, my TL;DR is that I believe the tone and mood of Stolitz Montage doesn't fit Stolas' emotional journey in Sinsmas as well as Day By Day does.
If you do want to read my full personal analysis, keep reading below the cut!
-
(Note: I'm going to focus on the songs' lyrics, because I'm not knowledgeable enough about music to analyse the musical aspect of the songs. If anyone else wants to add their thoughts in that regard, be my guest!)
Let's start by taking a look at the lyrics of the scrapped song, Stolitz Montage:
youtube
So you're having a bad time
You're stressing and everything all seems much so
You've been having a sad time
And your family probably hates your fucking guts so
The song starts by describing Stolas' situation and emotional state in the days following the trial: he is sad and overwhelmed, everything feels like "too much", and his family probably hates him.
It's pretty clear from the get-go that they wanted a song for this montage that conveyed Stolas' struggle to adapt to life as a commoner, away from everything he's known, and having gone cold turkey on his depression meds (the lack of which is emphasised visually throughout the song).
The song is also in second person: Stolas isn't him, or me, he's you. This is something both songs have in common. It keeps the song at a slight emotional distance from Stolas. Whereas a first-person song would make the feelings too personal—would make Stolas too aware of his own struggle—and a third-person song wound be too distant, the second person allows Stolas to be only passively aware of his emotional state. He's not the one singing; he's the one being sung about. What he's feeling is being pointed out to him by an external, seemingly omniscient voice.
The song continues:
Ooooh-oh oooh ooh
I know you feel it too
You lost your way
And just can't fake it for another day
It's hard to take it
Just pretend you're gonna be okay
Here is where I think the tone of the song starts to deviate from what they wanted to convey in this montage.
At first glance, this is a continuation of the previous verses, and mostly expands on Stolas' emotional state: "it's hard to take it"; "you lost your way".
The key difference is that the lyrical voice now plays an actual role in that emotional state.
First, it states that it shares Stolas' feelings ("I know you feel it too"—implying that Stolas isn't the only one who feels this way). Thus, the lyrical voice starts shifting into an active character within the scene. And not any kind of character—one that can relate to Stolas and, more importantly, one that can offer some comfort.
Then, there's the line "just pretend you're gonna be okay". Now, I see two possible interpretations for this line. It can either be a piece of advice for Stolas (hey, I know it's hard, but just pretend), or another description of his struggle, a continuation of the previous line: "(it's hard to) just pretend you're gonna be okay". Personally, I lean slightly towards the former interpretation, especially because the lyrical voice's intention to offer comfort and advice becomes clearer in the next line of the song:
You're not okay and that's okay
This is where the focus of the song shifts fully towards a hopeful, even optimistic view of Stolas' situation.
Now, I get where they were going with this. "It's okay to not be okay" is a very powerful thing to say to someone who's struggling with mental illness and hard life circumstances, and it's one Stolas badly needs to hear.
In fact, it is a message that is conveyed to Stolas multiple times throughout the episode. By Blitz. Not through words, of course—but through actions. In the montage itself, as well as throughout the rest of the episode, Blitz constantly stands by Stolas' side, offers him company and comfort, meets him where he's at emotionally, doesn't pressure him to be okay, and (especially at the end in their apartment) gives room for Stolas' sadness and grief to exist. He hugs Stolas, puts his hands on Stolas' arms, and opens up emotionally about his own sister, and those are all ways of showing Stolas that it's okay that Stolas isn't okay.
But here's the thing. The knowledge that it's okay to not be okay is Blitz's, not Stolas'. That is Blitz's emotional state, not Stolas'. Stolas doesn't know it's okay to not be okay, and even though Blitz keeps conveying this message to him, he's not able to hear it just yet. Not this early in his descent to rock bottom.
In fact, learning that it's okay to not be okay is a journey that Stolas only begins at the end of the episode. By then, Stolas still isn't okay, but he begins to come to terms with the fact that that's alright. And he does this by allowing Blitz to sit in silence with him, to dance with him, to pry a laugh from him, to hold him without any expectations of being held back. The final scene of the episode is all about them both being okay even though Stolas isn't. We see this in the fact that Stolas lets himself stay in Blitz's arms, going as far as closing his eyes. He's there. He's finally in the moment. He's finally allowing the "not okay" feelings in his body to just be.
The Stolitz Montage song ends with:
You put one foot in front of the other
Then you take it day by day
Knowing you got nothing
You still got each other
Ooooh-oh oooh ooh
Again, most of these lines do match Stolas' emotional state. In fact, the notion of just living life one day at a time, just focusing on putting one foot in front of the other, is very representative of what a depressive episode can and does feel like.
But, in the very last line, the song shifts right back to a reassuring tone: "you still got each other".
Now, not only does the hopeful, optimistic sentiment of this line belong—once again—to Blitz's emotional state, it also goes directly against what the emotional arc of the episode aims to achieve.
Sinsmas isn't about them having each other—Sinsmas is about Stolas having Blitz.
It takes him all episode to realise this, too. At the beginning, when the montage takes place, Stolas is just going through the motions. As stated above, he's just focusing on putting one foot in front of the other—he's fully on survival mode. During the fight with Andrealphus, Stolas is shocked that Blitz came to save him, that he risked his life. That is the moment Stolas begins to truly comprehend that he can lean on Blitz. And then, after they get home, he slowly continues to learn it, as explained above. By the end of the episode, he's only just starting to allow himself to lean emotionally on Blitz.
And significantly, Blitz doesn't lean on Stolas. Because he's at a very different part of his own character arc, and he already had his opportunity to lean emotionally on those around him with Millie in Ghostfuckers, and to a lesser extent, with all his employees during their mission on Sinsmas.
Blitz has gone through enough pain, character growth, and healing to both understand exactly where Stolas is at, and be able to meet him there and be a rock for Stolas to lean on.
So the reason that line—that last line, positioned strategically to drive home its message that it's all gonna be okay—doesn't work for the montage is twofold. Firstly, because Stolas isn't ready to see that he has Blitz. Secondly, because it is now Blitz's turn to give comfort without needing to receive it in exchange.
And, if we take a look at the whole song, the reason it doesn't work for the scene is because it doesn't meet Stolas where he's at. The song says, "yes, you're sad, but—" and shifts to optimism. It doesn't fully allow Stolas to simply not be okay. To not be there yet. It doesn't fully allow his depression to just suck. The feelings of sadness and overwhelmingness are shadowed by a positivity and hope that belong to Blitz, and not Stolas.
Let's now take a look at Day By Day, and at which ideas from the original song were kept, which ones were changed, how, and why it works:
youtube
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
You take it day by day
You got everything that you had thought you wanted
But you still feel so blue
And you don't know what to do
Right off the bat, the lyrics are very similar in tone to the ones at the beginning of Stolitz Montage. Once again, a lyrical voice in the second person describes Stolas' emotional state: he's blue (sad), he's taking it day by day.
But there's already a change. "You have everything you thought you wanted, but you still feel so blue".
The fact that Stolas had always wanted a life with Blitz is something the previous song doesn't touch on whatsoever. And it matters, because "what Stolas thought he wanted" is a central part of his arc in the episode. It comes back during his breakdown at the office: "and I did it for what?! These stupid, foolish fantasies?" And it comes back again when Blitz saves him from Andrealphus, and when Blitz dances with him and their eyes meet afterwards.
As stated above, this is the episode where it dawns on Stolas that he has Blitz. But he isn't there yet at the beginning of the episode, and so he still believes what he and Blitz had was just a fantasy of his. And because he's never had anything with Blitz that wasn't a fantasy, because fantasy is all he knows, he doesn't immediately know what to do with the real thing. With the domesticity, and the errands. He doesn't recognise the signs Blitz is sending his way that he's got Blitz to lean on.
These two lines are also important because they bring forth another aspect of depression that the previous song doesn't: that love doesn't cure depression, or make it magically go away. That going cold turkey on your meds and having a massive depressive episode is going to suck no matter how many good things you have in this life, because depression is a biological process, not a state of mind. Depression takes away your ability to find joy in things that used to bring you it. It takes away your feelings, your energy, your strength.
Notice that Stolas doesn't seem apathetic or hollow inside on the night of the trial and the morning after. Yes, he's had his title and power stripped, he's been physically assaulted in the street, and yes, he's worried about Octavia. Obviously, he shows signs of being dissociated, and he's exhausted. But, emotionally, he's still hanging on. He still thanks Blitz for everything, and he talks to Blitz in the morning, and smiles when Blitz offers to get him rats. Before the effects of going cold turkey on his meds start to kick in, he's grateful to be around Blitz.
It's during the montage, as the days go by, that he starts feeling blue. Because depression is very quickly taking away the joy he found in Blitz's company.
And that's why, even in the first few lines, this song conveys Stolas' state of mind so much better than the previous one. Because while the message in Stolitz Montage was "yes, you're sad, but—", the message in Day By Day is "yes, you should be happy, but."
It lets the sad win over the happy. It lets depression take Stolas down with it, it lets him feel helpless and lost. "You still feel so blue, and you don't know what to do."
The song continues:
You're sitting at the end of the rainbow, but the pain grows
And you can't help let the strain show
'Cause what else are you to do?
These lines emphasise the ideas presented in the previous ones: that Stolas should be happy, but he isn't. That the pain that has planted itself in Stolas is growing. So much so that he can't help but let it show.
Stolas' helplessness, his slow descent into misery, are given the room to exist. Everything around him seems fine, but he's not fine. And he's not told that it's okay to not be fine. Because this is Stolas' emotional state we're exploring, and for him, it's not okay to not be fine right now. He's too busy going through the motions to grant himself that kind of mercy.
The song finishes:
Keep it calm, life goes on, and on, and on
Nothing's wrong, nothing's wrong
So why do I still feel this way?
Ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh
You take it day by day
And, much like in the previous song, we get a small hint of what could be interpreted either as advice/reassurance from the lyrical voice, or as Stolas actively telling himself to pretend to be okay. "keep it calm, life goes on, nothing's wrong". In this case, though, I lean towards the latter interpretation for a very simple reason: the next line shifts to first person. "So why do I still feel this way?"
And that's the thing: once again, the hope and calm he's trying to make himself feel are immediately overpowered by his feelings of sadness. Once again, it's the sadness that wins over, and not the happiness. His depression is given room to drag him down, take him slowly towards rock bottom.
And once again, the last line—at least the last one before the chorus is repeated—is used to drive home the message of the song. But this time, the message is that, despite it all, despite having what he wanted, despite sitting at the end of the rainbow, despite trying to convince himself he's okay, he still feels sad. Because that's what depression does. No matter how many good things you have in your life, it drags you down.
And that message, in that last line, is delivered in the form of a question. "Why do I still feel this way?" This matters for two reasons. The first one is that it shows that Stolas isn't (fully) aware of what's happening to him. He obviously knows he needs his meds, he knows he should be taking them. We see him reach out for them. But he is also living his emotions, and not just experiencing them from the outside. And as the emotions take over, he loses perspective of where they come from, too caught up in how they're drowning him.
The second reason this matters is because the song and the lyrical voice don't offer Stolas answers.
In Stolitz Montage, Stolas gets an answer to his struggle: that, ultimately, [Blitz and Stolas] still got each other.
But in Day By Day, all Stolas gets are questions. What else are you to do? Why do I still feel this way?
Day By Day meets Stolas where he's at during the days leading up to Sinsmas after the trial. It allows for these questions to exist without an answer; it lets the answers come later in the episode. It lets his journey through the episode play out, allowing him to learn that he has Blitz, that he needs his meds, and that he has to be okay with the fact that things are not okay.
By the end of the episode, he can acknowledge that he made his choices and has to deal with the consequences. He starts to understand Blitz is by his side, willing to help him through this. That his relationship with Blitz might not feel like he thought it would, because he's too mentally ill and heart-broken to be there—but that they still have each other, they still love each other, and they'll be okay.
But during the montage, he's not there yet, and it wouldn't make sense for the song to be there, either.
So, yes, as cute and optimistic as Stolitz Montage is, and as glad as I am they released it anyways for us to enjoy, I believe the writers made the right decision by scrapping it for the episode.
If you read this far, thank you for your time! Please treat yourself to a glass of water for me, and feel free to share your thoughts ❤️
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theshippirate22 · 2 years ago
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i keep seeing videos of joe playing his guitar and it’s giving me Thoughts™️ so congrats (slightly NSFW- Minors DNI)
“Alright, alright!” Eddie calls. It’s getting late, the crowd is getting a little more rowdy (or maybe just more drunk) but this is important. He decided he was going to do it a while ago and he’s finally going to commit, reputation be damned.
Especially when he sees who’s looking up at him from the front row.
“I’ve got something to confess.” He starts. “Baby, you listening?”
Steve cocks an eyebrow suspiciously.
Eddie doesn’t say anything for a minute, lets the crowd get uncomfortably quiet. Watches Steve’s expression go from amusingly confused to… concerned almost. His eyebrows get tight and Eddie wants to kiss the tense spot between them so badly.
“Stevie…” He breathes. The mic makes it sound more uncomfortable than he means it to. “I lied to you.”
Steve tips his head, and thank God, he doesn’t get that pale, shattered look he used to get when Eddie let a joke go on too long and his insecurities got the best of him. Now he looks apprehensive; he’s waiting for the punchline because he knows Eddie and he knows it’s coming.
“Remember when you found that A-Ha tape in my car?” Eddie adds, and it’s followed by a little strained laugh consensus from the crowd. But Steve, God, But Steve, bursts into the biggest grin.
“It’s not El’s.” He finishes, and he can’t keep a straight face anymore, letting the laugh split his face in half when Steve mouths back “I know.”
“Oh do you? You sneaky little…” He rolls his eyes, but the smile won’t leave his face for a second, he knows that. “Then I guess you know what’s coming next.”
Jeff starts it, the little duhduhduhduh-duhduh-duhduhduhduhduh of Take On Me and Gareth leaps in the third time around with a little heavier drumbeat than the original.
And Eddie? He’s leaned over the edge of the stage, trying to keep his pitch right so he can hit the high notes later on, holding out his hand to help pull up his boyfriend, who’s still beaming like he’s won a million dollars.
The audience, unsurprisingly, is having the time of their lives. Steve always makes a cameo in the shows, they’d be disappointed if he didn’t, but this is something else altogether.
Eddie’s halfway through the chorus before Steve is actually up there next to him (It’s harder than you’d think) and Grant passes over a mic- the one they’d gotten specifically for this purpose- and Steve is singing.
Eddie thought he’d get over it eventually, the soft shyness of Steve’s voice, but he hasn’t before and now is not the time either. Especially when he’s trying to focus on the stupid pop chords and Steve is right there behind him, hand snaking across his waist. Hooking his chin around Eddie’s shoulder and getting so close that for a minute, it’s the mic taped to his face that’s picking up Steve’s voice. Reaching up under his arm and over his chest to pull down the collar of his shirt and bite his neck in the .2 seconds between the second verse and the chorus.
In retaliation, Eddie joins in, almost trying to shadow out his voice because he can get his own infinitely deeper, but it doesn’t work; they meld together like hot butter and there’s a colossal cheer of approval from the long-neglected dark.
And as soon as he was there, invading every inch of sanity Eddie has left, Steve is gone, has half-crossed the stage to return the mic to the stand and then he’s dancing over to Jeff in his skin-tight jeans and he’s showing off, actually. He has to be. No one is that perfect without trying.
Not to be outdone, Eddie throws in a little improv at the bridge, glancing over at Steve when his hands don’t demand his attention, and it’s very obvious that him and Jeff are talking. On stage. About God knows what.
Before he can even question it, he’s barely finished his own peacocking, Steve has Jeff’s guitar and is picking out the perfect, high, electric melody.
duhduhduhduh-duhduh- duhduhduhduh- duhduhduhduh
And obviously Eddie’s not going to pop a boner on stage- he’s not sixteen- but my god, how is supposed to be normal about this?
Steve has barely enough to time to finish his set of riffs, get the strap over his head, and put the guitar back in Jeff’s hands before Eddie’s got him by the belt loops and he is going to kiss him right now, he has to…
And that cheeky bastard pushes his face away, keeps hold of his chin to stop him from fighting, so he can grab the mic stand and finish out the chorus.
(Before he’s even done, Eddie’s already licking at the corner of his mouth.)
The last chorus goes completely forgotten, Eddie’s hands shifting along Steve’s belt and up under the hem of his polo to drag him impossibly closer, Steve locking his fingers into Eddie’s tangled hair, and if Eddie’s mic picks up a few of their soft moans, well, that’s the business of them, the band, and the 8,000 people watching them make out.
(Not that the audience minds. They’ve been chanting “Steve! Steve! Steve!” since he first started singing)
(The band minds. Ew. Those two are menaces to society)
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guess-my-next-obsession · 2 years ago
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Stable Girl!Joel and Sunshine
Joel trying to take care of her pregnancy cravings and needs. Massages, carrying her to see how the horses are doing, I googled how to make oatmilk ice cream and it could be doable, just need like butter or cashews to make it creamy ♥️♥️ I like the idea of Joel being taught how to do it by hand♥️ just for her!
Ah Strawberry ice cream?!
Love Language
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pairing: The Stable Girl-Verse!joel miller x f!reader (Sunshine)
rating: F (talks of pregnancy/symptoms, joel is perfect)
a/n: AHHHHHHHHHH this SENT me anon 😭 the strawberrrriesssssss 😭
the stable girl masterlist | joel masterlist
“Again?” Joel’s voice sounded from behind you as you sat at the dining table in the middle of the night, scarfing down the chocolate cake Ellie baked as a “congratulations” for your newly announced pregnancy. You froze as he flicked the light on to get a better picture of the scene he was walking in on—you in your nightgown, your belly as round as a watermelon, chocolate frosting on your mouth.
“I had a craving,” you meekly justified your current state, bringing an amused grin to his face as he walked over, sleep tousling his hair and softening his eyes. Pressing his lips to your forehead, he pulled up a seat beside you and plucked your fork from your hand and shoveled a piece of cake into his mouth. “Who said I wanted to share, huh?”
“My apologies,” he smiled as he lifted a piece to your lips, his lazy grin growing wider as he watched your lips wrap around the fork, cleaning it off. His thumb brushed against your bottom lip to collect the chocolate frosting that rested there before sucking it off with a satisfied hum. “I love seein’ you like this.”
“Yeah?” You laughed and rolled your eyes at the compliment. “I’m sure I look like an absolute goddess right now.”
“You do to me,” he crooned, his hand reaching down to rub over your stomach through the cotton of your gown. “Carryin’ my baby. You couldn’t look more beautiful to me than right now.”
“You’re awfully sweet for being woken up in the middle of the night,” you cooed back with a smile, pinching his chin.
“One more bite and then you’re comin’ back upstairs with me,” he ordered, reaching for the fork to feed you a satisfying final bite before doing the same for himself.
Obeying his command, you let him take you back up to bed for the night, your sugary craving now satisfied and a new, sweeter craving dawned—a craving for Joel’s arms wrapped around you, lulling you to sleep.
“How’s baby Miller doin’?” Joel mumbled against your shoulder as he kept his lips pressed there, holding you from behind and rubbing your stomach.
“Starting to kick a lot,” you chuckled through your sleepiness. “And they apparently have quite the sweet tooth. I haven’t stopped craving sugar since the third trimester started.”
“Oh, I know,” he chuckled and hugged you closer. “Can’t wait to have her here with us.”
“Me neither.”
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Joel stood in the kitchen, a piece of paper in front of him on the counter with a messily scribbled recipe he’d jotted down courtesy of Maria. With the cake long gone by now, you’d gone days without something sweet to fulfill your cravings. Though you didn’t make a fuss over it, Joel took it upon himself to remedy the situation with an attempt at homemade ice cream—strawberry, thanks to the community garden’s latest impressive harvest.
“Oof,” you came waddling inside the house from the backyard, your hands still wearing your gardening gloves as they supported your lower back. “I think I’m getting too pregnant to take care of my flowers,” you pouted as you found yourself a seat at the dining table to watch Joel as he shuffled around the kitchen. After a beat of no response, you huffed out, “Hello? Am I a ghost?”
“Huh?” He turned around with a frantic, flustered expression and seemed to just now realize you’d come inside. “Sorry. I’m just…why are recipes so damn hard to follow. What’s the damn difference between a teaspoon and a tablespoon?”
“Well, one’s bigger,” you chuckled and found the strength and energy to stand up and waddle over to the sink, your gloves coming off so that you could wash up. Peering over his shoulder, you nosily studied what he was working on before catching a glimpse at the recipe sheet. Though his handwriting wasn’t the cleanest, you could clearly make out “Strawberry Ice Cream” as the title. “Are you making ice cream?”
Joel whipped his head over at the sound of your bright voice, your smile wide with delight.
“Yeah,” he sighed, disappointed that his surprise had been ruined. “Was tryin’ to keep it a surprise until after supper but—“
You tugged him into a hug so tight he worried for a moment that you’d crush him.
“Thank you,” you mumbled against his neck as your face buried there. Joel chuckled and peeled himself from you enough to look you in the eye, his smile soft as he studied the appreciation written all over your face.
“Don’t thank me yet,” he laughed, leaning in to peck your lips. “Might fuck it up.”
“I have full faith in you,” you assured with your thumb and index pinching his chin. “Especially when I call Ellie in here to help you because I need that ice cream, my love. More than I need anything.”
“Oh, anything, huh?” He crossed his arms over his chest and turned playfully jealous in an instant. You laughed and stroked over his beard until his pour turned into a smile.
“Fine, almost more than anything.”
“Thank you,” he smiled into the kiss he planted upon your lips before tapping your ass lightly. “Now what were you sayin’ when you walked in?”
“Oh, I was just saying I don’t think I can look after my flowers anymore. My back is so sore these days—“
“Is it sore now?” He slid his hand up to rest on your lower back, his warm palm soothing over the aching muscle. When you let out a sigh of relief and rested your head on his chest, Joel felt a frenzy of affection swarm in his belly. “Baby,” he cooed, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “Let me take you upstairs and fix you a bath.”
“No,” you objected, lifting your head off his chest. “I really need to fix up the nursery. Baby girl is gonna be here in six weeks.”
“I’ll get someone else to do it—“
“No, you already got someone else to cover my shifts at the stable, and the garden, and now you’re trying to take away my nesting?” you playfully scolded him, a smirk on your face.
“I just hate seein’ you work too hard. You’re already workin’ a miracle by bringin’ my baby into the world,” he frowned a bit, something he’d only ever let you see. “I’ll leave you to your nestin’ but not until you sit in a hot bath. Your back’ll thank me later.”
“Fine, it’s a compromise,” you grinned and pulled him down for another short but satisfying peck. “Okay, I’ll go upstairs for my bath while you and Ellie finish the ice cream.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Later on that night after having spent at least an hour in the bathtub and twice as long fussing over the nursery, Joel forced you to relax at the dinner table, bringing you a plate of the most tender roast you’d ever seen.
“Oh my god,” you beamed as you looked from the plate to his eyes. “You did this?”
“I’ve been workin’ on my cookin’,” he shrugged bashfully. “It ain’t exactly fine dinin’, but I thought you deserved a fancier dinner than what I normally throw together.”
“You—“ You grabbed his chin and turned his face towards you, your smile still bright and beaming. “You are the love of my life, Joel Miller.”
Joel looked touched, his smile soft and sweet, just like him—or at least the side of him that you knew.
“And you are my life. Everything I do, everything I got—“ He placed his hand on your thigh and squeezed. “Everything. It’s yours.”
“Don’t make me cry on my food,” you chuckled and wiped the tears that filled in your waterline. “It looks too good to ruin.”
Joel laughed. “You started it.”
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ithilien-writes · 11 days ago
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yaaay! my prompt is choosing joy verse wedding planning (even if it’s just your thoughts on the roles everyone takes on!) ♥️♥️
Okay, this is probably not at all what you were envisioning, but I hope you still like it!! Thank you for the prompt! 💜💜
(to anyone reading: these were meant to be quick scenes to help unblock me so please take them in that spirit. ie. this was written really quickly and without much editing. feel free to send me some more!!
---
Best Laid Plans [Buck/Eddie (Buck & Maddie), G, ~900 words]
Buck is not being a bridezilla, okay? Or groomzilla? Whatever. He's not. No matter what Chim says about it. Buck is just being... particular. So that everything will be perfect. Eddie deserves that. Buck deserves that. So he's just- he's taking the wedding planning seriously, that's all.
"I'm just saying, why does he always have to do it here?" he can hear Chim saying in the other room, followed by a distinctly Maddie-sounding huff that's part fond and part exasperated.
Whatever she says in response, it's too low for Buck to hear, but when she comes back into the kitchen she's alone and he can hear the front door opening and then closing again. Buck can't help but wince a little in apology.
"Sorry," he says. "I didn't mean to drive Chim out of his own house."
But Maddie waves him off, one hand resting on her now very pregnant stomach.
"It's not you," she says, too forgiving of Buck, as always. "He's just stressed about the baby coming so soon. I sent him to run some errands; it's fine."
She comes around the island to peer over his shoulder at the three invitation samples currently spread out in front of him and hums thoughtfully.
"I like the cream with the blue font," she says. "The gold looks to fancy and the grey's a little boring."
"Right?" Buck agrees, probably a little too emphatically, as he twists around to look at her. When he sees her smile though, it makes him feel a little like he's twelve years old again, and the sudden surge of love that wells up in him almost takes him by surprise, if only just in it's ferocity.
"That's uh. That's what I was saying," he adds lamely, after a moment.
Maddie's smile gets a little brighter and she rests a hand on his shoulder.
"I'm so happy for you," she says, getting a little teary the way she seems to be at the drop of a hat these days. "You know that, right?"
"I know," Buck tells her, feeling his own throat tighten a little around the words.
Maddie sniffles and then rolls her eyes at herself.
"God sorry," she says. "Third trimester. I've already cried three times today. This baby needs to hurry up already."
Buck laughs with her, picking up their chosen invitation and tucking the other two back behind it. Maddie circles the counter again and goes to make another pot of coffee. It's decaf, but she swears it still has some kind of placebo effect. Buck's not entirely convinced.
He drums his fingers on the table a little, debating with himself. But it's just Maddie. It's just the two of them. He could ask her.
"Hey, um," he starts, a little awkwardly. "Do you- do you ever feel. I don't know. Weird? A-about Jee-Yun spending time with Mom and Dad?"
Maddie turns back from the coffee maker and regards him seriously. She doesn't look thrown by the question, even though Buck knows it has to seem like it's coming out of nowhere.
"Honestly? Yeah, sometimes," she says, and Buck lets out a slightly shaky breath, feeling weirdly relieved by her answer.
"It's not like-" she pauses, considering- "I'm not worried about her safety or anything, obviously. But I remember what it was like growing up in that house. Some of things they said to us. To you."
She sighs, fidgeting with the mug in her hands a little.
"So yeah, I worry a little," she admits. "Sometimes."
Buck nods, looking down at the invitation without really seeing it this time. Eventually he looks back up at Maddie and finds her still just waiting. Always so patient with him.
Buck clears his throat.
"They just- they haven't really... met Christopher," he says eventually. "I mean, obviously they did, at your wedding. But like, they haven't really spent any time with him. And I'm- I know it's dumb, but I'm-"
"I get it," Maddie tells him, voice soft.
Then, even more softly-
"You don't have to invite them, Buck."
Buck scoffs a little, at that.
"Come on," he argues. "They're our parents. I have to invite them."
"No," she argues back. "You really don't."
Buck shakes his head.
"That's not even- I want them there," he says. And he does. He's... pretty sure he does. "I'm just-"
Maddie sets down her coffee.
"Okay, how about this then - maybe you should just talk to Christopher about it," she suggests. "He's a teenager, so he's old enough to understand complicated family stuff-" Buck can't help but snort a little, at that- "and maybe it would good for you guys anyway. For him to understand things a little better."
"We did uh. We did kind of talk about it once," he tells her. "Or well, I did. He said our family was messed up."
This time it's Maddie's turn to snort.
"Well, if the shoe fits," she quips, picking up her coffee again but sighing a little discontentedly as she takes a sip.
Buck looks over at her and can't help but smile again.
"I don't know," he says, "I think my family is actually pretty great, these days."
Maddie smiles back at him, even as her eyes immediately go teary again. And well- if Buck gets an earful from Chim when he gets home about making Maddie cry, he can take it.
It's worth it.
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edupunkn00b · 2 months ago
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Go Back. Move On. Repeat.
Logan would do anything to fix the mistakes of the past. Anything to bring Virgil a peaceful night's sleep. Anything to take away the pain.
Anything.
Written for @tsspromptmonthevent's Sleepy Bean Fanfic Café, for @amateurmasksmith. Prompt: analogical, QPR-style canon-verse time travel, anything but crack or hurt/no comfort. Mutual pining, childhood best friends. If possible 5 & 1, & time loops, y’all are the experts, so feel free to be creative! -
The first night Virgil appeared at his bedside, black shadows stretched half-way down his face, Logan had simply peeled back his covers and patted the mattress next to him. Virgil had leapt in, hood still pulled down to his eyes, and curled into Logan's embrace.
"Shadowling?" he'd murmured, tightening his arms around him. "Have you had a nightmare?"
Virgil nodded his head, hands gripping Logan's pajama sleeves with such strength Logan heard two stitches pop.
"Would you like to talk about it?"
Virgil shook his head, just as fervently.
Humming, Logan nodded his assent. Even in the safety of his room, where logic and fact and truth would tamp down on even the most fantastical of Virgil's fears, putting words to the images of a fresh nightmare could have deleterious effects.
"Very well," Logan had said softly. He pulled the covers up over Virgil's shoulders. "Would you rather I left the light on?"
Safe in his arms, Virgil had already fallen back to sleep. Settling back against the pillows, Logan closed his eyes and whispered. "Goodnight, Shadowling."
The second night, Virgil trembled in his arms, breath hitching as he fought back a sob.
Logan pushed, carefully. "Are you quite certain you would not benefit from sharing at least part of your dream?" He did not need to say aloud that the repeat nature of this nightmare seemed to be his anxiety's own way of raising some sort of issue Thomas—and therefore all of them—needed to work through.
Virgil looked up at him, unshed tears glittering in the low light. "You…" He looked away, burying his head under the covers. "I dreamt we were back there."
Heart caught in his throat, Logan remained silent and listened. "Like… like after the video we started. When…" He peeked out, shadow covering his cheeks. "The Guys and Dolls video. The one… You know…"
"Oh, Virgil…" Logan held him close, brushing back his hair. "We're all here and safe," he said gently, the words carrying a special weight in his room. "We're never going back there," he promised. "Never again."
"I know," Virgil nodded, holding tight as though no-one had informed his hands that Logan would remain by his side. "I know."
The third night, Logan was waiting for him. Arms curled tightly around Virgil as he slept, Logan lay awake all night, replaying the events of that day—well, days and weeks—in his mind. Patton's tears. The phone call. Virgil's panic attack.
Thomas' breakdown.
It had taken Janus a week to convince Roman to even open his door and it was months before he would even attempt to influence Thomas' decisions again. Disguised as his brother, Remus had stepped in, and Janus had had to work overtime to keep him sufficiently reined in so that Thomas could continue his livelihood and create enough to meet his financial obligations.
More than a year passed before Virgil would listen to him, let alone heed any of his advice.
The more he considered the events that had led to their near destruction, the greater Logan's conviction there was something else he could have done. If he'd tried harder, Logan was certain he could have stopped Thomas from speaking to his ex. He could have found another channel for Patton's broken heart, which would then have permitted Roman another mechanism to be their hero. With enough planning and effort, Logan could have prevented The Incident.
If he'd tried harder, he could have kept Virgil's trust.
Over the past seven years, through effort and patience and consistency, they'd finally gotten to where they were now. Virgil trusted him again, perhaps even more than he ever had.
But what if he'd never lost that trust in the first place? What if none of them had needed to fight back from the brink as they had?
The next morning, after ensuring Virgil had eaten and was safely occupied with a small trip in the Imagination with the others, Logan returned to his room and locked the door.
He approached his bookshelves and pulled down the books in the precise order. A Wrinkle in Time. The Midnight Library. Letting out a slow breath, he pulled down the last, This Is How You Lose the Time War.
The wall next to him shuddered and a tall thin strip cut through the plaster and wood. Bright light spilled out and Logan set the books down on his bed and approached. Pushing firmly on either side of the crack, he widened it until he could fit through. Peering in, he confirmed he'd found the correct moment.
His past self stood in his usual spot, past Virgil by his side on the landing, past Thomas in his own corner. Logan's voice dominated the room. "Thomas, it is time to move on. I feel like I'm... Heh, listen to me, 'feel like...'"
From his new vantage point, this time Logan caught how Virgil winced under the weight of his sarcasm and it took effort to hold himself back from leaping right in without preparing. "I feel like I'm... nearly out of productive things to say on the matter. I'm just frustrated."
Just as Logan remembered, Patton chose that moment to join them. "Hi, Just Frustrated, I'm Sad. I mean...
Cliched adages sometimes held wisdom and it was through the lens of crystal clear hindsight that Logan now saw the thinly masked pain in Patton's eyes. This! This was the moment he could change!
He took a deep breath and leapt in. "Patton?" he asked, truly giving the Moral side his attention. "Are you.." Gravity and entropy push-pulled him, fighting his effort to change the past. "Are you quite alright?" he finally managed.
"What?" Patton asked, eyes darting between him and Virgil. Avoiding Thomas'. "Of—of course I'm alright. I'm Patton!" he said, smile sufficiently bright to see from space.
"Yes," Logan agreed, glancing over at Virgil and Thomas. He played with his hoodie strings, but watching their interaction. Thomas had moved closer, peering closely at Patton. "You said you were… sad."
"Ha! I did! Slip of the tongue, there, Kiddo," Patton laughed, thin and brittle.
"Pat?" Thomas said, sitting down and tugging Patton's hand until he joined him. "Buddy, I know how I'm feeling and you…"
"Aw, Kiddo…" Patton pulled him into a long hug. "What's got you down?"
"'Never trust a hug,'" Virgil muttered. "'It's just a way to hide your face.'"
"Fantastic Doctor Who reference, but first…" Logan refocused on why he was there. "Patton," he said, overusing his powers a bit. "Patton, you are crying."
"Wha—I'm not—"
Thomas pulled back and searched Patton's eyes. Tears sparkled in his lashes. "Pat?"
Roman popped up. "I've got it! Thomas, you write down all of your thoughts and feelings in an eloquent letter and deliver it to him in a basket full of his favorite things."
"Oh?" Patton scrubbed at his face, sniffling. "That… that might be nice. Y'know…" He fidgeted with the velvety paws of his onesie. "To hear his voice again?"
Sitting up straight, Thomas radiated surprise as he looked between his Heart. And his Hero. "Yeah… Yeah, that's a good idea. I could—"
"WHOA, whoa, whoa... what?!" Virgil jumped into the center of the room. "You can't do that, Thomas!"
"He's been brainstorming all day and he has yet to come up with one productive, non-creepy idea." Logan's words spilled out on their own accord, the grooves of history too strong to fight.
"I'm not creepy, I'm joking, alright?" Roman sneered at him. "You just don't understand love."
His own anger layered over with his past self's reaction, fists at his sides. "I understand that it's—"
"He's right," Thomas interrupted, eyes still fixed on Patton's face. He'd begun to cry again, and Thomas was wiping his own tears away. "You just don't understand what it's like to love someone and to lose them."
Virgil's eyes on him were heavy and he couldn't quite force himself to meet them. "Thomas, no, this is categorically unwise. You—"
"Look at Patton!" Thomas cried. Tears flowed freely down his cheeks and they all felt the sharp cut of his pain. "I have to do something!"
Roman slid into the spot on Thomas' other side. "Why don't you call him?"
Virgil growled next to him, shaking his head. They exchanged a glance and Logan nodded, stepping closer.
But before he could find the words to dissuade Thomas from making quite literally the biggest mistake of his life, Thomas nodded. "Yeah," The scene replayed, the past repeating just as it had the last time. "Yeah, I should call him," he murmured, scrolling through his contacts until he'd found the right number and pressed Call.
The world collapsed onto itself and Logan found himself back in his room, the books still on his bed even as the crack was sealed as though it had never existed. He examined his memories, shaking his head. Everything played out the way it had in the past. The phone call, the meeting, the next failed date.
The hospital.
Dragging both hands down his face, Logan sighed then checked his watch. Barely ninety seconds had passed since he'd returned to his room.
He tried again.
...
"Look at Patton!" Thomas cried. Tears flowed freely down his cheeks and they all felt the sharp cut of his pain. "I have to do something!"
Roman slid into the spot on Thomas' other side. "Why don't you call him?"
"No!" Logan marched across the room and plucked Thomas' phone from his hand. He threw it to the floor, stomping on it. Glass and plastic crunched beneath his shoe.
"Logan! What are you doing?" Roman cried, shoving him away. "You are interfering!" he said, stooping down to scoop up the remains of Thomas' phone.
"Never fear, dear Thomathy!" Roman said, rising up with a gleaming phone in his hand. "What one part of your mind can destroy, another can repair. Here," he said, pressing the phone into Thomas' hands and casting narrowed eyes at Logan. "Call him."
Once again, Patton's room dissolved into black and Logan was alone in his room.
Logan tried again.
"It is illogical to call him when we have a full and complete understanding of why he broke up with us in the first place! Put down the ph—"
"Forcing him into a relationship with us will only lead to heartache and further pain. You must stop this, Thomas, you must—"
"Stop it! I must insist! It is unreasonable to believe that trying again will end in anything but—"
~
Logan failed. Over and over and over again.
Head in his hands, Logan sat on the edge of his bed. Perhaps he was focusing on the wrong moment to change.
He stood and reset the books. Then, centering his thoughts on a different exchange, he pulled them down once again.
A crack opened on the opposite wall and Logan peeked through. Patton was wearing his old grey cardigan, the proper one, not the onesie. He was smiling at Thomas, but had twisted his cardigan sleeves so tightly around his fingers they'd begun to turn white.
"… Virgil's room is where I have to go in order to heighten my anxiety." Thomas grinned excitedly at Patton. "I gotta think that your room is literally sunshine and rainbows.
Logan didn't need the vision of hindsight to see the panic washing over Patton's face. "Wha..." Remembering himself, he laughed. "I—" Eyes begging for support, he looked at the rest of them. "It's- It's not quite like that, uh..."
Thomas didn't see it. "Still, you're at the core of a lot of my happy feelings."
"I'm at the core of a lot of your feelings." Patton emphasized.
But Thomas wasn't listening. "Maybe going there and enhancing those happy feelings is what I need."
Virgil bounced on his toes, hoodie up. Logan met his gaze with a reassuring smile. "Everything will be okay," he whispered, then moved into the center of the room. "Thomas, I must object. This is a terrible idea in your current state."
"He's right!" Roman cried from across the room.
"I am?" Logan parroted. "I mean," he said, shaking his head and turning to face him. "I know I'm right, but you agree with me?"
"Yes, I'm just as surprised as you are, Erlenmyer Task," he said with a dismissive wave as he moved to Thomas' side. "Why waste your time wallowing in the past when you can be thinking about your future?"
"My future?" Thomas asked as Patton's face lit up next to him.
"All you need do is seize it!" Roman said, grabbing at the air like he could pluck dreams from the ether. "Call him!"
Virgil stood, feet frozen to the carpet, shaking his head. "Guys, this is a really bad idea…"
"Oh, he's right, Thomas!" Patton continued as though Virgil hadn't spoken. "Your future!" Patton and Roman grinned at each other and the rest of their plan spread through the Mindscape. "Your future with him!"
"Wait, Thomas, no!" Logan began, but Thomas had already pulled out his phone.
"My future," Thomas said, tapping at the screen before putting it up to his ear. "It's ringing!" he cheered.
And the world went to black.
"Dammit!" Logan roared, kicking his desk chair. It rolled away and hit the foot of his bed, spinning ineffectually. Just like him. Forcing calm, Logan closed his eyes and reviewed the new past few years. It hadn't worked. If anything, he'd managed to make everything worse. He looked around his room.
Gone was the extra chair by his desk, the extra nightlights he'd installed missing. The shelves were filled with more books, but the little nook he'd set up for him and Virgil to read together sat cold and desolate. No pillows, no blankets.
His heart heavy, Logan felt the loss of his old closeness with Virgil like a wound. Aching and not quite closed over.
He had to try again. But perhaps, this time, he might seek out help.
~
Janus' door was no longer next to his. For that matter, neither was Remus' Logan stood staring at the blank spot on the wall between his and Virgil's rooms for an unreasonably long time. Finally, he walked to the end of the hall and turned into the shadows. Remus' door, dimmer than usual, was the first he saw, followed closely by Lucas'. At the very end of the darkened hallway lay Janus', lightly glowing, the only source of light in this section of the Mindscape.
Logan knocked and a surprised voice answered. "Can I help you, Logic?"
"Well…" His formal address unnerved him, but he carried on, straightening his tie before answering. "Yes, I thougth that would be obvious given the fact I've come to see you, J—" His mouth snapped shut. "Dj—" he tried again. Realization hit and he stood a little straighter. "Deceit."
Janus opened the door, eyebrow raised. "Now that was interesting," he purred. "Do come in, my dear Logic. It's a pleassure to have you."
Taking his invitation at face value, Logan nodded his head and moved inside. Janus' room was colder than it usually was. Though, Logan had never actually gone to see Janus in his room before he'd been accepted, so perhaps this was how it always had been. He shivered, looking over the cold-blooded Side and frowned. "Thank you," he said, taking a seat where Janus indicated. "Deceit, I've…" He pursed his lips, loathe to admit a failing, but the ache of missing memories—and the sight of Janus settling a heated blanket over his lap in his own room—drove him forward. "I've made a mistake and I believe I need your help to repair what I've done."
"Really…" Janus murmured, sitting back in his seat, gloved fingers steepled before him. "Do tell. How has the great and mighty Logic erred?"
He supposed he deserved that. Swallowing back a retort, Logan told Janus everything. He told him of Virgil's nightmares, watching his snake eye expand and contract with hidden emotion. He told him of his plan to prevent The Incident and how he'd only succeeded in exacerbating the situation.
He spoke until he'd run out of words and sat there, quietly watching Janus think.
"So your plan has been to counter Thomas'—and Patton's—emotional need to connect with this man with an appeal to Logic?" he finally said, one eyebrow cocked.
"Well, yes." Logan blinked back at him, uncertain where he hadn't been clear. "And it failed."
Laughing, Janus shook his head. "Of course it failed. You're fighting emotion with ration and thought." Waving his hand, Janus conjured a small tea tray and pushed it closer to Logan. "Youngest pours, you know."
Accepting his task with a frown, Logan poured Janus' cup and then his own. "So how do I—"
Smiling over his tea, Janus raised both eyebrows.
"We," Logan corrected, suppressing an eyeroll. "How shall we fight an emotional reaction we know is doomed to fail?"
"My dear Logic," he purred as he lifted his cup. "We fight fire with fire."
~
Back in his own room, Logan faced the glowing crack in his wall, Janus at his side. "Are you quite certain of this?"
"Of coursse I am," Janus murmured, tugging at each of his gloves in turn. "Are you certain you can maintain your role?"
He stared at the empty spot where Virgil's chair usually sat, a metaphysical manifestation of the emptiness in his chest. "I am certain," he said and stepped through.
Logan held his tongue and listened as Thomas excitedly explained his idea to Patton. "Maybe going there and enhancing those happy feelings is what I need."
"Honestly, that does make sense," Roman quickly interjected. Logan scanned the room. There was no sign of Janus anywhere. "…everything in the past that you've cherished. I mean, it is PEAK proud papa."
Logan's eyes widened as he stared at Roman—not, Roman, though, but Janus. His eyes flicked down to the bit of black peeking out from beneath Roman's princely white tunic and Roman-Janus winked at him.
Virgil's knee bounced and he gnawed at his thumbnail, watching them all like they were a horror movie. Patton was equally unconvinced.
Ordinarily, any time Patton and Virgil agreed, Logan might be inclined to heed their wishes. But he'd seen the world where they remained here, trying to work this out. He stepped into his role. "Patton, don't you want to help Thomas move on?"
Patton blinked at him in surprise. "Well, yeah. Of course. I would love that, but I..."
"Good," he said, cutting off his objection and fighting to ignore the buzz of anxiety Virgil was barely suppressing. "Then it's decided."
~
The fuzzy veil of Patton's room fell over him, dulling his thoughts and pulling him into a haze of nostalgia. Despite his current artistic pursuits, the vast array of memorabilia from Thomas' education was solid proof of his continued acknowledgement of the importance of genuine learning. Lost in an unsubtle sense of vindication, it barely noticed Janus' slip when he described how difficult it had been to keep Thomas in denial during his teen years.
And it took him an unconscionably long time for him to notice Thomas'—and Virgil's—growing distress.
"Virgil?" he asked quietly, hand reaching for him nearly of its own accord. "Are you okay?"
Remaining silent, Virgil merely shook his head.
Glancing back at Roman-Janus, Logan caught his tiny nod as he played tunelessly on Thomas' old recorder.
No. He couldn't leave now. Not with Virgil so upset.
He began to explain. "...Nostalgia can have an adverse effect on their overall mood. It can sometimes cause them to look at the past compared to the present period in their lives and cause them to ruminate even more on how their present situation "pales in comparison", however incorrect that outlook may be."
Logan nodded hopefully as Thomas' expression shifted. Surely he could see Virgil's distress. "Their Anxiety worsens." Perhaps he could convince everyone to leave. Perhaps this time basking in the halcyon glow of Patton's keepsakes had been sufficient to steer Thomas away from attempting to rekindle am old flame that had been rightfully extinguished. Perhaps—
Thomas peered closely at his Anxious Side. "Virgil, that's not happening, right?" Virgil's tempest tongue spilled out. "No."
Roman-Janus stared back at Logan, slapping Virgil's own hand over his mouth before the truth followed.
'You must be ready to play your part, Logic. No matter what.'
No. There was still a chance.
It took every scrap of control Logan had to not simply grab Virgil's hand and sink out together with him. He needed the others to leave, as well. "I'm going to take that as a yes. Come on. Let's go."
They simply needed direction. "It's time to end this experiment right—"
"Wait, wait, wait, we can't go now!" Roman-Janus cried, the impersonation near-peefect. "We haven't even started reminiscing about all the Broadway shows that he's seen!"
Logan stared as his command of the room slipped through his fingers.
"And all these old photos! Look at this!"
No no no no no.
Panic seized him as he tried yet another appeal to reason, but Roman-Janus interrupted with an uncalled-for ad hominem attack.
Logan exploded.
"All of this because Patton can't let go of one person?"
Everyone froze. Patton looked close to tears. "Logan, can you stop? Please?"
Roman-Janus raised an eyebrow.
Now.
Logan sank down in an exaggerated huff worthy of any of Thomas's theatrical accolades. He stood in his spot in the common room, arms wrapped tightly around his middle.
Perhaps his emotional outburst hadn't been entirely for show.
It was all up to Janus now.
Logan squeezed his eyes shut, the look of betrayal in Virgil's eyes as he's left nearly too much to bear. He could always return, feigning recalcitrance or regret.
"Or you could just hang out behind the couch," Remus' voice tore him from his reverie and Logan spun around.
He lay sprawled on the kitchen counter, pushing back his cuticles with the spikes on his Morningstar. His clothes had changed, rather, we're how he used to appear before he'd revealed himself to Thomas. Eyeshadow darker and lips lined in green, he appeared both more alluring and more dangerous. Thigh high leather boots and shorts covering fishnet replaced his leggings. His green sash  dingy, mossy and dipped in what appeared to be blood.
"Do..." Logan could hardly believe he was prepared to take advice from Remus. "Do you really think that could work?"
Remus' grin sent a shiver down Logan's back, all teeth and entirely too pleased to have an audience. "There's only one way to find out, isn't there?"
~
Thomas' stood with his phone to his ear as Logan rose up partway and crouched behind the sofa. Damn, he was too late! He gripped the back, preparing to push up just as Thomas' ex answered.
Virgil interrupted them all with his tempest voice. "Hang up!"
And Thomas did.
Logan sat behind the couch, listening as emotion fought emotion. Janus was right.
"Now, Roman," Patton's emphasis on his name led Logan to believe Patton finally realized who stood in Roman's spot. "Lying is wrong."
The Mindscape shuddered as Thomas took Patton's side. "Yeah, that's a side of myself that I would prefer not to feed into."
And Roman-Janus let everything out, arguing the case for pursuing Thomas' ex as though he really believed they should. Pushing, prodding, eggin him on.
But Virgil stood strong. "GET RID OF IT!" he shouted, Thomas' eyes glued to his ringing phone. "GET RID OF THE PHONE NOW!"
Turmoil settling, the Mindscape stilled and the remaining Sides shared stories of the early days of their relationship. Soft and calm and bittersweet, Logan nodded to himself, preparing to sink back down to leave the more emotional Sides to work out these… feelings.
Then Patton told a joke, his laugh sharp and forced.
That was unnecessary, Patton.
"You know you don't have to do that, Patton," Thomas said gently and Logan's eyes widened, listening intently.
"What?" he asked, hiding behind a laugh.
Patton you needn't hide your feelings with humor. We know you are more than simply Happiness.
"Try to... " Thomas' voice grew more certain. "You don't have to hide what you're feeling with jokes. It's okay to be sad sometimes."
"I'm never sad! I'm your happy Pappy Patton! Just a fun-loving father figure figment."
Logan said aloud, voice overlapping with Thomas' "Falsehood."
Patton paused. Had he heard him? "You… you said yourself. I'm at the core of a lot of your happy feelings."
Thomas' mouth moved but Logan's words poured out. "You're at the core of a lot of my feelings... Happy or otherwise."
After that, Logan listened, the buzz of Thomas hearing him so completely slow to fade. "When I was younger, my uncle used to take me fishing…"
The rest of Thomas' story faded and Logan found himself and Janus standing together in his room. "Did… did it work?" he asked Janus.
Janus smoothed down his cloak, the yellow bright and pristine. He flexed his gloved fingers and eyed Logan. He wondered what parts of his appearance had changed. "What is my name?" he asked.
Logan smiled. "Your name is Janus."
Nodding slowly, Janus turned to examine Logan's room. Bright fairy lights glowed from every corner and a lush, purple throw was neatly folded over one of the desk chairs. A matching indigo throw sat on the other chair. The reading nook was filled with pillows and blankets in every color. Fewer books but more journals. A larger telescope was aimed outside the window.
"Yes, Logan, I believe it did."
Their heads swiveled toward a brushing knock at the door. "Come—come in," Logan said, smiling when Virgil poked his head inside, sparkly purple shadow filled in below his eyes.
"Shadowling," Logan whispered and Virgil smiled back at him.
"There you both are!" He stepped inside and grabbed Logan's hand. "Come on, we're waiting for you!" he said.
A silly grin spreading over his face, Logan followed, stopping only when Virgil looked back over his shoulder at Janus. "You, too, Jay. Don't think you're getting out of snow day in the Imagination."
Janus blinked and Logan suspected his own memories of their reconciliation were filling in. "Well," Janus said, a crooked smile belying his sarcastic tone. "I suppose someone has to test the twins' new sauna."
"That's the spirit," Virgil shrugged. "I think."
Still, he smiled brighter than Logan could ever remember. Except… he could. A tiny, relieved smile when he spotted Logan first after their return from Patton's room. A grin when Roman woke up after Remus' introduction. Remus' introduction!?!
"You alright there, L?" Virgil asked, thumb rubbing little circles into the back of his hand as Janus led the way to the Imagination.
Cradling Virgil's hand between both of his own, Logan nodded. "Yes," he said. "Yes, I believe everything is alright."
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swiss-mrs · 1 year ago
Text
#WEIRD☆GIRL
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(Word Count: 4.6k)
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Rating: PG-13, Adult Language and Themes, All Characters are 18+
Reader/OC Description: Reader/OC is Afro-Latina. She has long, dyed black hair that is worn straight with baby bangs and shaved brows. She is an alt baddie and would've definitely ruled MySpace. Body shape/type is not detailed. No Use of Y/N.
Playlist
Synopsis: One day, while Dave and Todd are out, they pass by a park void of screaming kids. Instead, the park is taken up by a group of what looks to be a mix of teenagers and young adults. Passing by the loud group, the boys can't help but stare, mixing Dave up with a girl more socially unacceptable than him.
Warnings(?): Adult Language, Sexual Themes (No Smut, Just Horny Boy Thoughts), Catcalling (Potentially Triggering Language)
This is written in third person but mainly narrated from Dave's view.
》》》
"I can't believe they had it!" Todd exclaims, gripping the plastic bag in his hand tight. Dave nods, gripping his backpack straps.
"Yeah, we need to start coming here more often. They have everything. We gotta bring Marty with us when he gets back."
Today marked the first day of the boys' last Spring Break. Marty was out of town on a trip to Florida with his family, so this cut down the trio to a duo, Dave and Todd. The two were currently walking along a street on the other side of town than their usual hangout. Todd found a new comic and video game store, and he and Dave figured they'd check it out.
"I can't wait to read it."
"Remember, no spoilers until I pick up my edition too." Dave replied. As they round a corner to get to their bus stop, they are greeted with the sight of a large clearing between buildings.
On the closest side to the boys was a skate park. It had a decent amount of skaters occupying it, echoes of skateboards landing against concrete traveling throughout the park. As the boys walked passed, they could hear the sound of music. The further they walk, the closer the music gets.
The current song that was playing was what Dave imagined rugged bikers with dark sunglasses and handlebar mustaches listened to. Scary and intimidating. It was muddy and grungy and punk and metal? He wasn't well versed enough to really know how to label its genre. Just as one song came to an end, another just like it followed.
He and Todd were both staring at the group surrounding the picnic table that held the speaker. Each one was different from the next, but they all had a similar dark and grungy style.
Something that immediately caught his eye was a black haired girl who took two big steps to get atop the picnic table. As the new song began to pick up, she got into a matching character. As she winded her hips and lip sang to the lyrics, Dave was completely entranced by her. "Woah..."
"Yeah…" Todd absently replies.
Her unnaturally dark hair cascaded down her shoulders and around the curve of her breasts. Her bangs reminded Dave of a toddler who decided to experiment with scissors. They were far too short to be considered "normal", but, Jesus, did she pull them off well.
She had two bows on the sides of her head, one purple and the other an off-white cream color. She wore a black, short sleeve crop top with red writing on it, something Dave couldn't really read clearly from this distance. She had knitted, fingerless gloves on each hand that nearly blended in with her skin tone. Dave's eyes continued to work their way down her legs, finding her thighs covered with light pink, sheer lace shorts that stopped mid thigh. The only thing keeping her "appropriate" were homemade, cut-off jean short shorts.
Dave couldn't help himself; he was captivated. He's never seen anyone dressed like she was, at least not in real life. It was like she stepped right out of an anime. She was incredibly unique. How was she able to pull that off so well?
Dave's eyes wandered down further to get a full view of her exposed, dancing legs. He couldn't help but wonder what it felt like to touch them.
She swiveled her hips in circles as she began to spin and whip her hair to the beat. Dave had this opportunity to move his eyes up, getting a perfect view of her butt, his body lighting up as his heart raced.
She had made a full turn, stopping in the direction of the two boys, catching their stares. Todd immediately turns his head to try and seem captivated by the clouds above, but Dave is not as quick to notice.
"Dave." Todd mumbles, eyes dodging the girl's gaze, darting back and forth from his friend, the ground, and a very (not-so) interesting brick building behind the park. "Dave." Todd repeats, elbowing Dave in the side, finally snapping him out of his hypnosis.
"Ouch!" Dave yelps in surprise, turning to Todd who is looking at him wide eyed, trying to send him a message. Dave looks away from his friend and back to the table dancer. She was staring right at him with squinted eyes. They seem to make eye contact for a solid second before she abruptly lifts a hand to her forehead. She held up her pointer and pinky fingers. The 'rock and roll' symbol she held against her head imitated horns as scrunched her nose, sticking her tongue out like a child. The action shocked Dave, but he couldn't help but find her oddly adorable.
Todd is quick to snatch the handle at the top of Dave's backpack and drag him away to their bus stop at the end of the street. The ride home was a pretty quiet one after that.
》》》
Two weeks have passed since he'd first seen the strange girl. Every spare chance he got during spring break was spent taking advantage of his vigilante skills for the wrong reasons. He had secretly visited that park numerous times, watching his girl and her friend group from afar. He knew that stalking was not how he should've gone about this, but he also didn't see walking straight up to her and introducing himself as an option either.
Something was definitely wrong with him. There is no good reason for him to know where she lives, but he convinced himself it was just to ensure she got home safe. Tonight only enforced that thought.
Usually she would walk home with at least one friend for good measure, but for some unknown reason to Dave, she walked alone.
Today, she had on an extra baggy hoodie. One that he came to know as one of her favorites. It reached the tops of her bare thighs, the hem of her mini skirt just visible below. She wore leg warmers that matched the color of her hoodie and worn combat boots. She had a small backpack that looked like wings on her back, decked out in pins of all kinds. The oversized hood was perched on top of her head.
She was always good about checking her surroundings and looking over her shoulder when walking alone, but this wasn't a matter of a sneak attack.
Dave watched as an older man stepped out in front of his strange girl. Dave couldn't hear the exact dialog due to their distance and the passing people and cars, but he for sure knew that whatever was being said was not welcomed.
"No. Thank you. I'd rather be left alone." Dave heard that loud and clear, so why did this creepy guy not take the hint and leave?
The man abruptly reached for her arm, and gripped it tight. Dave took off in a sprint.
"Get your hands off me, asshole!"
"Don't be a fucking tease-"
"Hey!" Dave cut the guy off, running up behind her. "Didn't you hear what she said, creep? Let her go!" He said firmly. Both the creepy guy and the girl's eyes look over to Dave, both of them giving him a once over. Her eyes were full of confusion, one thinly drawn brow raised. The man scoffed at the kid.
"What the fuck is this?" he shoots back. Dave squares his shoulders and raises his masked chin. "How about you mind your fucking business, princess, before you get hurt." the man follows up, making fun of Dave's costume.
"Let. Her. Go." Dave repeats sternly. The guy laughs in his face.
"Or what, leotard?" Dave follows up by removing the batons from behind his back. He points one at the man.
"Or else I'll have to beat you until you let go?" He says confidently. The girl cringes, that was not nearly as intimidating as he thought it was. The guy laughs again, flicking out a pocket knife. The two men stood there in a stare down. Their pause gave the girl a chance to yank her arm from the man's grasp, simultaneously using her other hand to whip out a pink taser decorated like a mini Gameboy. She shoves the sparked end into the side of the creep's neck, causing him to twitch and spasm. She holds it there until the man falls to the ground twitching, presumably unconscious. She takes her booted foot and jumps into a hard kick to the man's side.
"Fuck you, dipass!" Dave stands there shocked. The girl's gaze switches to face him. He lifts his hands in surrender and slowly puts his batons back. The girl takes one big step closer to Dave. He jumps back, but she is quick to grab one of his hands and begin dragging him down the route of towards her apartment.
They walk a couple blocks and round a corner in silence before she stops abruptly and turns to Dave. He stands there staring, absolutely shell shocked. "Who are you and what do you think you're doing!?" She asks, putting two hands on her hips and resting her weight on one side.
"Uh-" Dave stutters. The girl raises her brows expectantly. "I, uh- I was trying to help you." The girl's brows draw together as she squints.
"Thank you, but, to be honest, you didn't really do much, and that only answered one of my questions."
"Uh, I'm, uh- The name's KickAss." The girl stares at him in disbelief for a good five seconds, searching his eyes for any sense of a joke.
When she doesn't find anything, she lets out a "pfft" and giggles. "You're joking, right?" She raises her brows with a grin.
"Uh, no. I'm not…" Dave's eyes look everywhere but at her.
"I-," giggle, "I'm sorry." Another giggle, " I don't mean to be rude, but KickAss?" Dave smiles nervously, instinctual reaching for the back of his head. "You really need a rebranding, my guy." She says, an amused smile still playing on her lips. Her eyes didn't hold any malice or judgement, just intrigue.
"Yeah, well, I'm obviously not that creative." He laughs nervously. Dave looks back to her, finally getting a proper look at her up close. She's smiling… at him. God, he was going to faint.
"Jesus, your eyes." She says suddenly, catching Dave off guard. "They're gorgeous, my god." She huffs a short laugh, staring into his eyes. Dave can't keep eye contact for long, completely flustered. He thanked the powers that be that he had a mask on at this very moment. He was sure he was as red as ever.
"Thank you." He looks down. "You, uh, your eyes are beautiful, too." He says sheepishly. She laughs, shaking her head.
"Oh, please. They're just a normal, old brown. Nothing compared to your stunners. Wow." She throws back at him. "Well, I appreciate you stepping in, KickAss." She thanks, putting emphasis on his 'name'.
"No problem. You seem to have it handled without me." His illusion of 'stalking for protection' ruined.
"Nonsense! Thankfully, I didn't need you to start a fight this time. The fact that you even stepped in at all when you saw something means a lot, so thank you." She clasps her hands in front of her, swaying side to side.
"Can I walk you the rest of the way?" He asks. She shakes her head.
"As sweet as that is, no, thank you. I don't quite know how I feel about masked men knowing where I live." She teases. "Plus, it's not much further. I'll be okay." She smiles at him, again. Dave can't decide if he wishes she'd stop looking at him or if he wishes she'd keep her gaze on him forever. She begins walking away, "Thanks, again! See you around!" She shouts behind her, turning another corner.
》》》
Two months have passed. Shortly after their first, up close, encounter, Dave made it a point to walk her home every chance he got, always when she was alone. Well, not every time. She started to get suspicious as to how he always knew when she was walking alone. "Are you following me?" She'd ask, Dave giving an unconvincing 'pfft' and a 'no', causing her to roll her eyes. After that, he made sure to space out their walks but still following her from a distance. It's now nearing the end of June, and his graduation date is only a couple weeks out.
This night was a first. She invited Dave in. His eyes widened in shock, "Yeah, sure!" He said a little too enthusiastically, internally cringing at himself, but his awkwardness only caused her to giggle.
She nods, "Okay. My brother is home, so you'll have to sneak in. I'll go in first. Just turn the corner," she points, "and use the fire escape ladder to get to the fourth window up. My window has a collection of ninja turtle action figures on the sill." Dave opens his mouth to say something, but she continues, "Wait there until I come in. I just have to let my brother know I'm home first, then I can disappear into my room." Dave sits his mouth and nods. "Okay, I'll see you up there!" She smiles, jogging into the building.
Dave watches her jog up the stairs until he can't see her anymore. He then makes his way around the building and, as instructed, climbs up the fire escape. He gets to her window with ease. Through the parted curtains, he could see into her dark room. The light in the hallway provided little to illuminate the room from the bottom of the closed door, but thanks to the setting sun, Dave could clearly see the four little trinkets on her windowsill. It made him smile. She was a little nerdy, too.
"Ok, I'll order the pizza!" Before Dave could analyze her room any further, she bursts through the door, tossing her bag on the floor. She turns, closing and locking the door before running up to the window. She throws the curtains open and slides up the window, smiling brightly at him. "Hola."
"Buenas Noches, señorita." Dave says, again cringing at his choice of words, getting a laugh out of her.
"Vamos." She says, stepping aside. He climbs through the window, trying his best to avoid disrupting the figures. "You up for pizza?" She asks once he's fully inside.
Dave nods, looking around at her room. "Yeah, sure."
She smiles up at him, gesturing to her room, "Bienvenido a mi casa." She says dramatically. "Make yourself at home, señor KickAss."
Dave chuckles at her, shaking his head. "Gracias." His accent is still strongly American, but four years of Spanish didn't make it the worst. He goes to sit on the plush bench at the end of her bed. He figured that was a safe bet. He wasn't on her bed, but he also wasn't awkwardly sitting at her desk in the corner of the room. It was a kind of middle ground. His eyes follow her as she goes over to her old school boombox, graffitied with stickers, and turns on some music, low enough for them to hear each other, but just loud enough to disguise their voices from any eavesdropping. "Do I need to worry about your brother?" He asks playfully, deep down a little nervous.
"No, he's playing video games with our cousins online. He can't hear a thing with his-"
"AHHH! NO MAMES WEY!" a scream can be heard, as if on queue, scaring the fuck out of Dave.
She rolls her eyes, continuing, "headphones on." She sits on her bed, crawling over to rest her bare legs on the empty cushion next to Dave. She grabs her laptop that was laying on the bed and opens it up. "What kind of pizza do you like?" She asks, typing away.
"Uh, whatever." He says, unsure.
"Well, guess we can't go wrong with half pepperoni and half cheese." She says, placing the order. "My brother is pretty boring when it comes to pizza." Another scream could be heard in the background, promoting another eyeroll. Dave chuckles a little, nodding.
He twiddles his thumbs before asking, "So, why did you invite me in?" The girl shrugs her shoulders, still typing and clicking away.
"I dunno. You've walked me home nearly everyday for the passed 2 months, and I've grown to trust you. Every time we part ways, I feel the urge to keep you around. I figured it was about time we hung out for more than just a few blocks." She closes her laptop hallway and sets it to the side. His heart flutters.
Dave looks at her stunned. "You want to hang out with me?" The girl squints at him.
"Um, yeeaaah. What kind of question is that?"
"I, uh- I mean- it's just- you know-..." He stutters. She giggles at him.
"What?"
"I mean, you're just so cool, and I'm, you know-"
She looks at him amused. "You're what? A cool vigilante guy who is sweet and funny and someone who should totally should give himself more credit." She bends her legs, nudging him softly with her knee. She scoots down the bed a little to sit closer to Dave, holding her knees to her chest. She uses her oversized sweatshirt to encompass her entire body. Dave looks at her with admiration, his heart racing again, before looking away from her and down at the bench below him. "I don't hear a 'Gracias' or a 'Tienes razón, mi hermosa. Eres muy inteligente y eres la mujer más bella del mundo. Gracias por todo, mi amor.'" She goes on.
Dave laughs, "Thank you. I don't know if you're right, but you are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen." Dave says boldly but still avoiding eye contact, looking down at his hands.
The girl's eyes widen, "You speak Spanish?" She looks horrified, embarrassed by the words of praise she tried to get him to say.
"A little." He twiddles his thumbs more, "I've been taking Spanish all throughout high school. I am no expert, but I can get around." He shrugs.
"Welp, that's embarrassing." the girl reaches up to tug hard on the strings of her hoodie, hiding her face in the fabric. Dave looks up and reaches for her hands.
"Que? No 'gracias'?" He teases, trying to get a look at her face. He has no clue what is coming over him, but he is becoming a bit more comfortable. His heart is still pounding, but seeing her get flustered brought his confidence up. She peers out from inside her hoodie. Her wide eyed look nearly floored him. He was forever grateful that he was already seated or else his knees would have buckled.
"Gracias,... señor KickAss." She says playfully, trying to make up for her embarrassment by joking off. He offers her a soft smile, melting her. It was now her turn to avoid his eyes. Her eyes make their way over to the stereo. "So… you're still in high school?" She asks, looking back to him, wearily.
He nods, "Y-Yeah, but not for long." He says quickly, the realization coming quick that they don't actually know each other's ages. "I graduate in like 2 weeks." Her nonexistent brows raise as she nods. "Are you?"
She shakes her head, "No, I tested out, got my diploma early. I couldn't be bothered with high school anymore." She shrugged. Dave's brows shot up. She really was smart. "It's just me and my brother. The earlier I got out of high school, the more time I had. It allowed me to help out with bills and whatever, get us a nicer place." She gestures to the room around her. "I mean, it may not seem like much, but trust me when I say it's a million times better than where we were." She then takes the time to look around and appreciate her surroundings.
Dave's look of admiration returns. "You're amazing." He blurts out. The girl's eyes find him, holding his eye contact, again with this wide eyed stare. She was gonna kill him. Her heart stopped when she looked in his eyes and found nothing but honesty and softness. She gives him a little smile. My god, Dave was literally going to pass out.
》》》
Dave didn't seem to notice, but hours went by with them talking, eating pizza, and talking some more. It was now pitch black outside, and the only light in the room was coming from her bedside lamps and a flickering candle.
By now, both of them had made their way into the bed. Dave was laying on his back, watching the ceiling while she was laying on her stomach perched up on her elbow, watching him. They were currently both comfortably silent, the soft music still playing in the background. She guessed that her brother must have fallen asleep at his console by now, considering there weren't any more frustrating cries or exciting cheers heard from across the apartment. Dave is the first to interrupt the silence between them. "Would it be a terrible idea to take my mask off right now?"
The girl gasps dramatically, placing a hand on her chest, "and reveal your secret identity, Zorro?" She lets out a short laugh, this causes Dave to let out a tired smile.
"I'm being serious." There's a pause.
"Well…" the girl starts, "you know, once you do so, there's no going back. I'm not so much of a bitch that I'd ever expose you, but you know… it's a big step."
"Is it in the right direction?" he asks, turning his head to look over at her. They stare deeply into each other's eyes.
She sighs, "I'm sorry, babe, but that's a decision you'll have to make on your own." The pet name catches Dave off guard. He nods and sits up, causing the girl next to him to follow suit, twisting her body so she's cross crossed and facing him. Dave takes a deep breath and reaches for the back of his mask. Just as his gloved hands meet the fabric, he felt a smaller hand touch his. "Are you sure?... Absolutely positive?"
He doesn't move, "Positive." He replies. She lefts go of his hand and he pulls the mask forward and off his head. He kept his head down for a second, taking in a deep breath. He could feel her eyes staring at the side of his head.
He looks up and turns to her. They make eye contact for a good 3 second before her sleeve covered hands come flying up to her face, covering her eyes. "Oh my god!"
"Oh my god, what?!" Dave panics.
"You're hot!" She exclaims. Wow, did she really know how to throw Dave off. He watches her, shocked. "This feels wrong, oh my god!" She says, muffled by her sleeves. "I should not be seeing this right now." Dave smiles a little. How does she do this? She's just too cute.
He reaches up for her hands, "Well, like you said, there's no going back, babe." He says, pulling her hands down. Her eyes were squeezed shut, scrunching up her face in what Dave thought was the most adorable way. "Oh, don't be a baby. Open your eyes." He says. She squeezes them even harder just before opening them up, like ripping off a bandaid.
She lets out a sigh as her eyes roam over every feature. She takes a moment to just admire his face before giggling when her eyes make their way to his hair. "What?" Dave asked, this time not panicked, but amused.
She giggles some more, smiling wide. "Your hair is a mess." She says finally, biting her smile.
He rolls his eyes, "Yeah, I don't really do face reveals, so I didn't bother thinking of a way to properly tie my hair up under the mask."
She smiles at him softly, her eyes relaxed. She reaches up to touch his cheek. It's warm and a little sweaty from being stuck under a mask for the last several hours. They get lost in each other's eyes. Dave's jaw was slack, lips parted slightly. Her features still held her soft smile.
"I think I love you." Dave says abruptly, taking her aback.
"What?-"
"I just always feel so safe and comfortable around you, and I love how you're so unapologetically yourself, and you are always so kind and beautiful, and I can't help but find myself always thinking about you, and I'm always wondering if you're thinking about me to, which I hope you do, because I wouldn't know what to do with myself if I wasn't on your mind the way you're on mine, and ever since I saw you dancing on that picnic table when Todd and I were walking to the bus stop and you made that weird adorable little devil horn face thing, I knew I just had to know you, like I was drawn to you, and-"
"Wait, that was you?"
Dave ignores get question and continues rambling, "and I know we're just kids, but I can't think of a better way to live life than with you, and I want us to be together. I want to go to see your favorite scary movies with you, even though it confuses me as to why you still go to them when you say they always scar you, and I want to hold your hand and be there for you when you're scared. I want to go see those bands you always talk about in concert with you. I want to learn every lyric to every one of your favorite songs just to impress you when they come on. I want to hold you at night when you've had a bad day and don't know what to do with yourself. I want to keep you safe and always make sure you're happy. I want to be the reason you smile. I want to walk with you forever, stay by your side. I want to fall asleep beside you every night and wake up to you every morning, and I want nothing more than to hear you say you love me and tell me you love me the same way I love you, and I-"
"Dave, shut up!" She says with a smile, her eyes glistening. "Breathe." They both take a deep breath together. "If you keep going, you'll turn blue." They share a small laugh. "Can I kiss you?" She asks.
Without responding, Dave dives forward and kisses her full force. They deepen the kiss, her other hand reaching up to caress his other cheek, his hands resting on the bed, one on each side of her knees.
Without breaking the kiss, Dave moves to readjust. He pulls her closer, moving her to sit in his lap. She follows his lead, getting up to straddle him. Dave wraps his arms around her waist, hugging her closer to him. She arches her back, "accidentally" grinding against him. Dave is first to break the kiss with a gasp, his hands immediately making their way to her hips. She opens her eyes to find Dave's squeezed shut with his eyebrows narrowed together. His blue eyes open to meet hers after a second, both of them breathing heavily, Dave's eyes wide and innocent, looking up at her.
"Sorry." He says, embarrassed that she was able to affect him so easily. She grins, shaking her head.
"Don't be sorry. It's good to know I have such an effect on you." She leans down to rest her forehead on his. She squishes his check together, pushing him down to the bed, his hands finding themselves caressing her now exposed butt from under the mini skirt she still wore. He felt all the blood drain from his head downward. "Should we keep going?" She asks. Dave nods furiously, no longer able to form words.
She leans in slowly to plant a soft kiss on his lips. "I love you, too."
》》》
Moodboard (exposing "y/n") on my page under #weird girl swiss fic
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art--harridan · 1 year ago
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[Image one: The first page of a digital comic about Miles Morales from the Spider-Verse movies. It begins with two panels of Miles' face resting on his closed hand. The first shows him in his school, wearing his uniform. He looks bored. The second has him in his first, store-bought Spider-Man costume. The forest surrounding Alchemax is behind him. Both of the panels cut off around his eyes. Next to them is two smaller panels, one showing someone in a classic Spider-Man costume swinging on a web, while the other shows their feet flying through the air. At the bottom of the page, there's Miles' legs flailing as he falls during the Leap of Faith scene. A panel is behind them, in a purple halftone gradient. Shards of glass surround the legs like lightning bolts. The page says "you always thought that the scariest part of a leap of faith would be the fall".
Image two: The second page of a digital comic about Miles Morales from the Spider-Verse movies. The first part of the sentence says "but really... it feels like flying;". This is interspersed with close-up panels of Miles in his first black suit. There's one of his outstretched hand, one of his chest symbol, one very close to his eyes and another of his outstretched feet. Behind the panels, there's a rock pigeon mid-flight. The sentence continues with "floating;", followed by four panels of Miles floating as his fall is flipped upside down. The pose is identical in each, but the background gets gradually darker for each one. Then, "free in a way that feels unnatural -" is written, accompanied by a panel of Miles in his school uniform. You can't see above his lips and he's sweating nervously, shoulders hunched. Scribbles, like the portals on The Spot, crowd around him. The sentence finishes with "you love it". The final panel zooms into Miles' hand clutching his backpack strap. His Spider-Man suit peaks out of his sleeve.
Image three: The third page of a digital comic about Miles Morales from the Spider-Verse movies. At the top of the page is Miles' shoes stood on the side of a wall, one foot hanging over the edge slightly. Above it, it says "the fear is in the precipice -". Below the drawing, it says "the edge", alongside Miles standing on a wall from behind, cut off around the ankles. The sentence continues "and what you gaze at beyond it", the last two words in a bubbly black and white font over top of a purple halftone gradient panel. Then, the sentence finishes "(and what you're scared will slink back in)". On the left side there's two panels, one a close-up of Kingpin's tie, and the other shows The Prowler's cape laying in a pool of blood. The other side has two panels set out the same. The top panel has one of The Spot's portals, while the one below it shows Jefferson Davis' glasses discarded and broken, one lens shattered and bloody.
Image four: The fourth page of a digital comic about Miles Morales from the Spider-Verse movies. It begins with Miles' shoes, one planted on the wall while the other hangs is elevated, hanging over the edge. Two panels beneath it show his feet with one lowered slightly, and then both planted on the wall. They're accompanied by the sentence "the hovering moment where you can still simply step back". After this there's two different Miles, standing with their bodies facing the viewer but eyes facing each other. The first is taller, unmasked, and wearing his outfit from the rooftop party. His expression is pinched together, worried. The other is in his ill-fitting store-bought Spider-Man replica suit, body posed as if he's been caught by surprise. His eyes, from what is visible, are wide. Two panels separate them - one is completely black, while one has a spark of blue lightning bursting out of it. Finally, the sentence ends "... but then you'd just be there; waiting, doing nothing".
Image five: The final page of a digital comic about Miles Morales from the Spider-Verse movies. It starts with Miles' hand in the darkness, unfurling as he reaches out his index finger. Blue lightning sparks off of it, leaving his finger like a claw. This is surrounded by the line "and you can't let that happen,". Below that, Miguel O'Hara's gloved hand creeps towards Miles, curled and claws out, like he's just failed to grasp something. It is large compared to Miles, who is swinging through the air, looking back at the hand. His body is fairly loose. The page ends with the line "even if the first step is the steepest".]
looking down
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maddy-k-reads-all-day · 3 months ago
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Okay... so I'm pretty sure the "Play My Way" song is canon considering its an official Amanda 2 song and it's listed in the games credits.
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So I'm also gonna consider the two animations the song is based on as canon, too. Bear with me.
If we consider all 3 videos canon then things get really interesting.
Timeline wise, I think all three videos take place before the first game.
The first where everything in the Hide and Seek tape goes smoothly where it's just a storyboard happens before Amanda and Wooly got trapped. I think this may have been a pilot to the animated series. It feels like it sets up what Amanda The Adventurer was supposed to be like. Amanda and Wooly are super friendly with each other, plus Wooly is missing his ears just like the games original pilot.
The second version might be sometime after they got trapped. Supposedly Amanda didn't originally remember her life as Rebecca in the first game right? I think this might be where she started to notice something off. When they replay the Hide and Seek tape, Amanda clearly gets the feeling they've done this before. I'm so sure about Wooly here tho.
Now let's talk about the song on its own, ignoring the timeline and just acknowledging that the characters find this tape familiar.
By the third time (the song), Amanda clearly notices that they've done this before and freaks out. And I think here if Wooly didn't notice something off before, he does when his part comes when he's repeating the lines from the animatics he sounds really unsure? "Right, you're the best... you must play this a lot." Like there's a weird sense of unease in his voice when he says this.
The chorus to me feels really interesting because I feel like we're getting Amanda's true feelings about this situation.
"Now watch us play our part. Now watch us dance and sing. Don't want to fall apart like kids who never seem to scream."
I love the puppet-like vibes these lyrics give off.
After this it seems like the tape resets cuz it's suddenly Amanda's turn again. And Wooly seems like he's really frustrated that he's not getting his turn. But Woolys verse is the most interesting to me.
"Now watch us play our part. Now watch us dance and sing. Don't let it break your heart just play along and-" He gets cut off.
This almost sounds equally passive aggressive as Amanda's chorus. There seems to be an equal amount of resentment. But the "just play along" part seems very fitting for Wooly. One thing I think about Wooly is he seems very avoidant of things that upset him. And it got me wondering if the reason he's always trying to redirect things isn't because it's some "job" of his, instead he simply doesn't like it. He doesn't like tragic stories he doesn't like talking about death or people you trust hurting you. But a lot of these things seem like things that Hameln intentionally wanted in the show so I'm really starting to belive that Wooly himself is the one who doesn't want to talk about it.
Another thing I find weird is how adamant Wooly was about wanting a turn and then how the moment Amanda was gone, he started to panic. As his verse continues after Amanda's chorus, he sounds more and more upset. I can't wait till the animation for this comes out because I really wanna know what Wooly was talking about when he says, " I don't wanna go in there." Omg. Didn't Amanda say that once?
Now, when he finds the "cat under the box," this time it's Mr. Fox? And then Amanda sings about killing someone. I don't think it's Wooly because, continuity wise, that doesn't make sense. We found out that killing Wooly does nothing he just comes back. So Amanda wouldn't try it twice, right? So I think it's Mr. Fox before the first game. Maybe Mr. Fox was a character similar to the opossum? Idk why Amanda would kill Mr. Fox unless if he was in their way. Actually, I know it isn't Wooly because Wooly is still alive at the end of the song- (imagine the music video comes out and makes me look like a fool)
I also wonder what Amanda's "it's you" is supposed to mean. Maybe Kate was the one watching this tape?
Anyway, these are my observations and theories. They are kinda messy and subject to change, but what do you think?
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