#he just said ha maybe i scuff them around a little

[writingouthere]

singledad!Sukuna x neighbor!reader-Sukuna and Yuuji really want you to join their family! role reversal from my other series, think this will just be a one-shot though. Yuuji is Sukuna's brother but he's raised him since he was a baby and Yuuji calls him dad.

cw: Sukuna is manipulative and also a murderer but everyone's happy and you're both aware so it's okay. this is really just fluff.

"I....want you to be my mommy?"

Sukuna scowled as Yuuji looked more confused than ever.

"No, no that is not what you're saying kid. You're just going to tell her about how the other kids' mommies on the playground make you feel left out."

"But they don't, Megumi's mommy always gives me a snack when I'm hungry!"

"That's not his mommy, that's Megumi's daddy," Sukuna corrected, wondering if this was just a hopeless endeavor. He could have easily followed a plan this simple when he was four, but Yuuji was too soft. This was what happened when you raised a kid in a stable, loving environment. They lost the ability to go for the jugular when needed.

"But Megumi's daddy calls him mommy?" Sukuna didn't hold back his groan. You were going to be coming back from your morning walk any minute. He didn't have time for Yuuji to not get basic directions or to explain the dynamics of that Gojo family.

"Look when we go out there, just look sad and I'll handle the rest."

"But I'm not sad, I'm happy. We're going to the park and Megumi's mommy is bringing mochi today!"

"Shit kid, do you want a mom or not?" Sukuna asked, trying not to roll his eyes as be bent down to snap on the velcro straps on Yuuji's light up sneakers.

"I don't need a mom, I have you," Yuuji said. He looked uncharacteristically defiant and Sukuna couldn't help feeling proud of his little brother.

It had been touch and go when Yuuji was a baby. Sukuna had still been a kid himself and they didn't have any money and Yuuji's mom was even crazier than Sukuna's. Their father nowhere to be seen. Since Sukuna and Uraume had spread the pieces of his corpse around the city.

Sukuna pushed these memories aside and ruffled Yuuji's hair. "I know you don't need one, we only need each other." Yuuji nodded, his little head moving with all his conviction. "But it might be nice, right?"

Yuuji seemed thoughtful before finally biting his lip and looking down at his sneakers. He tapped them, making the red and black lights flash.

"She's really nice, I like her."

"I like her too," Sukuna said and he heard the sound of your sneakers slapping against the tiled hallway. "So let's go and look sad, okay?" Yuuji nodded, determined now and Sukuna grabbed his backpack before the two brothers went out into the hall.

You were just taking your keys out of your bag and you turned to the brothers, a smile on your face. "Good morning gentlemen, it's nice to see you. Heading out?"

That was when you noticed Yuuji's downturned expression. Sukuna saw your face shift into one of concern and he resisted a smirk.

Sukuna cleared his throat and squeezed Yuuji's hand. Good boy. "We're heading out to the park, you know the one by the high school."

"Oooh, that's nice. You like that park, right Yuuji? You said it was the biggest one in the whole city," you crouched down so you could look Yuuji in the eye and Yuuji seemed to forget he was supposed to be sad for a minute because he jumped up and down, the lights of his shoes flashing in the dim hallway.

"Yeah, it has the best swings too!" You ooohed and aawed appropriately while Sukuna tried not to smack his head against the wall. Maybe he and this kid weren't related after all, fuck.

Yuuji seemed to notice his expression because he stopped jumping to look down at feet. He put out his lower lip and used the tip of one of shoes to mess with a scuff mark on the linoleum. It would have made a more pathetic visage if his shoes weren't still lit up.

"Yuuji," you said, coming closer so you could kneel on the ground in front of the boy. The sight of you on your knees did something to Sukuna, but he pushed it aside to see what the brat had in mind. So far, he wasn't impressed with the performance. "Is something wrong?"

"It's just," Yuuji let out a sad sigh that wouldn't get him a gig in a car commercial. "Megumi and his mommy will be there and it makes me feel sad because all the other kids have mommies and I don't." God, there was no way you could be buying this, Sukuna looked at you and saw that your eyes looked a little watery.

Huh, look at that. Maybe he wouldn't have to kick the kid out, after all.

"I'm sorry Yuuji, that must be hard," you said and you reached out and swiped out where Yuuji had even managed to shed a tear. Sukuna felt so proud. "But I know that your dad is really excited to take you and the two of you are going to have so much fun!"

"Could you come too?" Yuuji asked and you bit your lip. Yuuji looked up and batted his little doe eyes at you. "It would make me really happy if you came with us. We could all have fun together."

"I wouldn't want to intrude-"

"It wouldn't be intruding," Sukuna cut in. "If you're busy though no worries, I know we'll have fun just the two of us. Right, Yuuji?"

Yuuji bit his lip and Sukuna could tell he was torn between showing how excited he was to spend time with his dad and being 'sad' so you would join them.

You looked between the two before seeming to come to some kind of decision. "If you don't mind waiting while I change, I'd be happy to join you two. Should I bring anything?"

"I think we're all set. We'll wait outside for you," Sukuna said and Yuuji went up and gave you a big hug that you returned.

Sukuna took Yuuji outside to wait for you, the kid occupying himself with a mostly washed away hopscotch chalk sketch. Sukuna alternated between watching him and texting Uraume who was claiming to be over him and his nonsense. Sukuna would take it more seriously if Uraume hadn't been saying that for going on twenty years. He knew they loved him, fucking sap.

Soon, but not soon enough, you came bounding down the stairs. A scarf tied around your neck, your turtleneck exposed by the open top button of your coat. He couldn't keep letting you be single, looking all pretty like that. He was too greedy for that.

Besides, looking the way you did and knowing your big heart, it was just a matter of time before some nice loser tricked you into settling with them and he just couldn't have that. The idea of you taking someone else home to your warm apartment with it's million throw blankets and a cookie jar, an actual cookie jar, he was convinced you kept stocked up just for Yuuji, made him want to commit another murder.

"Ready?" you asked and Sukuna nodded while Yuuji took your hand in his right and Sukuna's in his left.

"Let's go!"

Yuuji's enthusiasm was contagious and the two of you chatted all the way to the park. Sukuna saw some people shoot you all looks as you walked. Sukuna was used to people viewing him with suspicion, even fear. His tattoos, dyed hair and general demeanor making people cross the street to avoid him. Something about you and Yuuji seemed to balance him out though and people reacted as if they were just looking at a cute family going out on a Saturday.

You didn't seem to notice either way and just continued talking to Yuuji about some new anime for kids Sukuna had probably had to suffer through but hadn't retained any memory of.

As soon as you all got to the park, Yuuji took off with barely a good-bye. You seemed concerned and Sukuna bumped your shoulder with his. "Don't stress, he just sees the Fushiguro kid over there. See, they're already fucking around."

He pointed to where Yuuji was chasing around a scowling dark haired boy the same age as him. Sukuna didn't buy the scowl for a second.

He had once run into the kid and his weird dads at the grocery store and the kid had scolded him when he figured out Yuuji wasn't with him. Sukuna would have knocked the kid down a peg if he wasn't actually four years old and if his 'mommy' didn't low key give him the creeps. Sukuna was pretty sure he wasn't the only person guilty of homicide currently at this playground.

"That's so cute," you cooed and Sukuna nodded along while he took you over to some picnic tables. Unfortunately one of them was already occupied.

"Aww if it isn't Sukuna. How nice it is to see your lovely face on a Saturday morning!"

"Gojo."

Sukuna was ready to leave it there but then the bastard got up and walked over. His partner continued sipping on a large cup of boba, watching from his seat although he gave you a little wave.

"Who is this, new girlfriend?" Gojo asked tilting down his sunglasses to look you up and down.

You laughed and introduced yourself while Megumi's parents did the same. Gojo grabbed your hand when you held it out and kissed the back of it, his lips curved into a smile even as he lingered, his fingers clearly holding onto where your pulse would be. Sukuna moved closer to you and put a hand around your waist, the gesture a clear sign for the other man to back off which Sukuna knew Gojo understood because the bitch fucking smiled at him.

Sukuna didn't necessarily take any of Gojo's flirtations seriously. He flirted with every mom and dad on the playground, including him when they first met. He'd even seen him flirt with the guy who worked the ice cream truck so egregiously the kid had looked on the verge of passing out. His partner never seemed bothered and Sukuna wondered if he was just that secure in the relationship or if he hoped someone would finally come along and get the annoying man away from him.

As usual though, Gojo lost interest quickly and went back to his husband who didn't say anything as Gojo lay across his lap like some kind of housecat.

"There are children here," Sukuna said. Mostly out of spite and not jealousy that the two of you weren't curled up like that.

"Don't be homophobic," Gojo said and you snorted before looking innocent when Sukuna shot you a look.

"Alright, let's go see what Yuuji's up to." Sukuna went along with your excuse, mostly just because he liked the feeling of your hand in his. The two of you wandered closer to the playground where Megumi and Yuuji were currently engaged in a game with some other kids that Sukuna couldn't have possibly guessed the subject of.

The kids alternated running around the large structure, disappearing into tunnels, jumping down to hide underneath slides and behind climbing walls. Every time Yuuji popped back up to view he would wave and call out to you both. Sukuna still felt a little warm whenever the kid called him dad and the look you gave him after made him feel caught.

"So, I can see why Yuuji was so sad those morning. Megumi's parents are just vicious monsters," you said and Sukuna was so taken aback he knew his expression didn't hide it well. You smiled and swung your hand that was still in his, turning so you could look at him.

"I don't think that's what the issue was," Sukuna managed and you nodded.

"Right, it must have been because he's so lonely," you said before the two of you were interrupted by the sound of children's ecstatic laughter. You both looked to where Yuuji was now being chased by an entire horde of children.

"I'm the curse, you have to catch me," he yelled out and the other children screamed and laughed as they tried to grab him. Yuuji had never had a hard time making friends and that was very evident in the way he got kids of all ages, even the quiet ones to join in on his game.

"You can have friends and still be lonely," Sukuna argued and you gave him just the softest look. It wasn't fair for you to see through his schemes and still look at him like that.

"Are you lonely, Sukuna?" You got closer to him, your hand still got in his and you were so warm. "Maybe I should come home with you, then?"

Sukuna couldn't have stopped himself from kissing you even if he wanted to, which he didn't. He let go of your hand so he could cup your face in both of his palms. You moaned your approval into his mouth and he responded by nipping your upper lip, pulling you up to meet him as he leaned down to kiss you. Sukuna was about to risk another arrest by taking you right here in the park before a familiar voice called out to the both of you.

"Hey now, there's children here."

Sukuna turned to give the infuriating dumbfuck a piece of his mind when you distracted him by pulling him back to you and giving him a quick peck on the lips. He could leave the fight with Gojo for another day, he supposed. He knew he'd win anyway.

You're smiling and you look so happy and Sukuna doesn't feel the least amount of guilt in getting you here. Even if you knew it was a trick.

Although.

Did this mean you knew that all those times he was "stuck at work" and needed someone to watch Yuuji were a lie too? Or that he actually could cook and the one time he set the building fire alarm off had been because he started an actual fire and not just him burning dinner and two of them didn't actually need you to invite them to dinner so much? Did you also know that your radiator hadn't just stopped working randomly but he had broke it, knowing you would call him because your super never answered, and when he said a part was still missing and you would just have to stay the night at his and Yuuji's place-

Sukuna looked at you more closely and you just kept smiling.

As Yuuji called for the two of you to come help him and Megumi on the swings, Sukuna wondered if he had ever trapped you, even once. Or if you had just let him catch you.

Watching you push Yuuji as the boy screamed for you to go "higher, higher!" he decided he didn't care. Fuck, it might just be better. Knowing you were maybe as crazy as he was.

shout out to the dad at the park today who had the audacity to play with his toddler and have a cute dog at the same time.

also I liked the end of this so much I may just write a prequel of Sukuna and reader taking turns gaslighting the other into a relationship, we'll see.

Edit: wrote the prequel, here!

[satorusugurugurl]

Paging Dr. Sexy and Dr. McDreamy!

Summary: You try to go to a Halloween costume wearing pretty scandalous costume. Both your boyfriends disagree with your choice, but you plainly ignore them. They decide to take matters into their own hands and punish you for it.

Characters Gojo Satoru x AFAB!Reader x Geto Suguru

Word Count: 3.2K

Warning: dress up, language, Brat/brat tamer, degradation, spanking, hair pulling, anal, sex unprotected sex, cream pies,

A/N: Kinktoner Day 18: Scandalous Costume! Ahhh my boys!! 😈 I would wear those just to get a rise out of them!

“No.” Satoru nearly drops the case of beer he’s holding as you step out of the bathroom. “No, what the fuck are you wearing?!”

You give him an incredulous glare, eyeing yourself up and down before fixing your attention back on him. “Uhm, I am wearing a nurse costume for the Halloween party.” Your white-haired boyfriend scuffs as emotion down to yourself to emphasize the point; in fact, we’re wearing a costume as it was clear as day.

“No, you're not wearing that shit!”

“Yes, I am!”

Satoru scrubs a hand down his face as he puts the beer on the kitchen counter. “Suguru!” he yells down the hall for help from his best friend and partner. “I need your help with this!” Suguru sighed b as he walked out of the bathroom, smoothing out the scrubs he had on before tugging on the white doctor's coat.

“What?”

“Did you know what she was planning on wearing tonight?!” Satoru asks, in a matching teal scrub, set complete with a stethoscope.

Suguru doesn’t even bother looking in your direction. He reached for the fridge, grabbing the fruit tray you were bringing along with the beer. “She’s got a cute little nurse outfit because we’re both going to this as doctors.” Suguru places the fruit tray on the counter.

“She cannot go to the party dressed like that.”

“Satoru.” Suguru chastises, giving him an almost disgusted look. “She can wear whatever she wants. I bet there will be more girls at this party wearing less clothes than she is. It’s fun; we’ll take off whatever little she has on when we get home.” Around the same time, Satoru realizes Suguru probably has no idea what you’re wearing. So, he grabs both sides of his boyfriend’s face without saying a word before turning his head to face you. When his violet eyes lock on you, his jaw drops.

When you said, you were going to dress as a nurse for this party. He had expected a cute little dress, maybe some thigh-high socks and heels. With whatever hat in the prepackaged costume. Maintaining sexy and cute at the same time. What you were wearing was considered as fucking lingerie! You wore a tight, one-piece, white lace lingerie corset set with red trimming that barely covered your ass.

Your boots were leather and a bright red, going up to the top of your thighs. And, of course, to ensure they didn’t fall, garter belts were fastened to your underwear so he could see as clearly as day through the lacy top you were wearing. The most wholesome part of your costume had to be the little nurse's head on the top of your head. Everything else looked like it was straight off of a porn site.

You looked fucking hot. That was the truth in black-and-white writing! You looked perfect. Your ass was voluptuous and delicious! But there was no way he would let you leave the house in that lingerie.

“No,” Suguru repeated his best friend's words from several minutes before. “You cannot wear that.”

Your cheeks puff out, and frustration as your well-done makeup glitters in the apartment's light. “I am!” You stick your bottom lip out, crossing your arms over your chest effectively, pushing your breasts that are already popping out together. “I did not seriously just spend an hour getting ready for you to tell me to change into something stupid.” Your boyfriend exchange with each other; their eyes have a silent conversation.

“You’re not wearing that, " both boyfriends said in unison. I told you this conversation was over.

So much your dismay the boys you put on boring scrub that they had. You weren’t going to let us stand, though. You had a plan when they would never come.

When you all got to Shoko and Utahime’s for the party, you immediately took off, telling them you needed to use the restroom. You insisted that they have their fun, and they, of course, took the bait. You smirk as you watch them hurry off to a table to grab some drink as you set off to invoke your devilish little scheme.

“Where is she?” Satoru asked, looking over the heads of everyone else walking around. In one hand, he was nursing Cola, and the other toyed with the badge that read “Dr. Sexy” attached to his chest.

“She’s fine, Satoru.” Suguru had it in his leg, shaking as he looked around the room for you. “She’s gotta be around here somewhere.”

Part of Satoru wanted to believe that, but he knew you. You tended to get a little pissy whenever you were told not to do something. And when you got pissy, you turned into a brat. It was only a matter of time before you started doing something to get back at them for making you change.

He huffed out a sigh, about ready to give up on his quest to find you. When he heard a whistle from across the room, he turned his head to the sound, looking over to see a few men standing off to the side, pointing at a woman passing by. One seemed eerily similar to you, which couldn’t be because you weren’t wearing the skin costume you had on earlier.

“There’s no fucking way,” Satoru grumbled, smacking Suguru’s arm, motioning him to join his side. “Please tell me you weren’t seeing what I’m seeing.”

There was a sharp huff from the longer-haired man as he pushed himself out of the chair, following his best friend's gaze. He stopped watching as your doppelgänger bent over the table, reaching for a drink. As much as he wanted to believe it wasn’t you, he knew your cute ass anywhere.

And that cute ass was currently bent over a table, grabbing a drink from Yuki, who reached over to toy with the lingerie corset you were wearing. The same one they both had told you not to wear. Both of your boyfriends moved before they could even think. They pushed past people, gritting their teeth with every glance. A guy stole it from you. Wanting to end the ones who are practically undressing you and eye fucking you right there in the room.

They had no issues with you wearing what you wanted. But when you were dressed like that in a room where men had trouble controlling themselves, they got protective. Besides, this costume, if you could even call it a costume, was nearly see-through, exposing parts of your skin that they didn’t want other people to see. They were possessive and protective in every way they could be. So they were pissed off with your little stunt was a bit of an understatement.

“You look so good!” Yuki cheered down her beer before draping an arm over her boyfriend, Choso. “Like seriously, dude, you look amazing!”

“Thank you!” You pulled back one of the red straps to your garter belt, snapping it against your thigh. “The boys didn’t want me wearing this, but I’m a grown woman who can handle myself!”

“Is that so?” A chill ran down your spine as you choked on your rum and Coke. “You can handle yourself?”

Yuki hissed quickly, averting her eyes as she tried to focus on anything other than the towering men above you. “Yikes, come on, Cho.” And within the snap of a finger, your best friend abandoned you to the wolves circling you.

At first, you froze, unsure of what to do or what to say. The smell of clean linen, mint, and pure musk invaded your senses. Usually, it brought you a sense of comfort, but tonight, it made your stomach twist and knots. You had to be strong, though you were making a point. This was your choice! You wanted to prove to them that you were fully capable of making your own decisions.

Whether they liked it or not.

Tilting your head back, you looked up at the two men glaring down at you. “Oh, hi, guys.” You took a long drawl of your drink. “I decided to get into something a little more comfortable.” Suguru and Satoru gave each other another look, one you weren’t able to read. “I hope you don’t mind.” To emphasize your point, you took the strap on your garter belt again and pulled it out as far as possible before snapping it against your skin.

“Oh, you wanna be comfortable?”

“That is what she said.”

Satoru grabs a handful of your hair, tugging your head to the side, allowing Suguru to slide down his mouth, pressing against your ear. “I hate to be the bearer of bad news. But this little outfit you’re wearing is far from comfortable.” In a single swoop, you were lifted off the ground.

“H-Hey!” Your cheeks were on fire as the boys paid no mind to anyone else clearing a path as they headed for the basement. “W-What are you guys doing?!”

Satoru went down first, ensuring the basement, normally reserved for Shoko’s close friends, was empty. “Oh, she doesn’t know what’s going on.” Satoru scoffed as bounded up the stairs, locking the door behind him as Suguru carried you down the stairs. “You’re so cute when you act stupid.” Satoru’s hand slapped firmly against your ass, drawing out a scream from you.

“You said you wanted to be comfortable.”

“Mhmm~ and that tight corset is far from being comfortable.” Satoru purred, tilting his head to the side. “So the only reasonable thing for us to do is to help you get even more comfortable.”

“Exactly; what kind of boyfriends would we be if we just let you suffer?”

Suguru sat down on the couch as Satoru came up behind you grinding his hips against the bed of your ass. “G-Guys, let’s talk about this, Haah!” You cried out as Satoru’s fingers hooked underneath the flimsy fabric of your outfit, tugging to the side, revealing the pink jeweled butt plug you had in. “I-I was trying to make a point!”

“A point we can read loud and clear.” Suguru hummed, his hands working at your breasts, squeezing and massaging them as he buckled his hips up against you. The swell of his cock rubbed perfectly over your clit. “Poor Princess just wants some attention, it seems.”

Satoru hummed in agreement, nodding as he grabbed the butt plug that was firmly placed in your ass, gently tugging on it, causing you to moan as it caught against the rim of your hole. “We can give you all the attention you want.” He slowly twisted the toy before pushing it back in, repeating the movement over and over again as Suguru continued grinding against it.

“I don't need attention.”

“That’s what your actions say. You blatantly disobeyed us. Fuck you lied to us. We can see exactly what you want and need now.” Suguru ripped the lazy corset down, shredding the thin material as he freed your breasts. “You wanted our attention.”

“And you got it.” Satoru finished as he yanked the butt plug out, causing you to cry out, tears forming in your eyes.

Oh, you had fucked up, you fucked up bad!

Before you have any time to register what’s going on, you feel the velvety smooth skin of both their cocks against you. Before Satoru grabs a handful of your hair and yanks it back, Suguru halts his hand before you. You stare at him, open, confused as to what he wants, until he flatten it out just below your chin.

“Spit.” He commands, and you oblige.

Satoru follows his lead, turning your head to face his hand, which is pushed directly in front of you. “My turn, Sweetheart.” You are starting to question your life’s choices and decisions at that moment. But you wanted to act on your own accord and thought you were making the right choice; I know you had to live with the consequences. Satoru hummed as you spat into his open palm. “Well, look at that. She does know how to listen.” That causes butterflies to flutter deep inside your stomach in your pussy as you listen to them stroking themselves with your spit.

“Too bad you didn’t listen to us earlier.”

In an instant, you’re filled with both of their cocks. Suguru is inside you fast and hard, while his white-haired best friend is slightly more gentle. So, push inside the tight ring of your hole. Both men have before kissing and nipping at your skin, allowing you, thankfully, to adjust to their sizes. You’re shaking, forming in the corner of your mouth as you cry softly.

“Holy fuck.” you whisper, eyes rolling back as they continue pushing inside of you.

“Yeah? This is what you needed, Princess?” Suguru asks as he gently begins fucking in and out of your cunt. “Need to put you in your place.”

You whimpered, tilting your head back before rocking against them, not caring about the sting of being so full. Your head spun as your walls twitched around your best friends and lovers. "Y-Yes! Punish me! I’m sorry for being such a bad girl." You cried out before pressing your lips so softly against Suguru’s that your request was barely audible.

Satoru groaned grout as he watched Suguru's eyes roll back. “Yeah, Sweetheart, you need to fuck some sense back into? Because we all know how much of a good girl you are." Suguru nodded in agreement, grunting as he began thrusting a bit faster in and out of you.

You whimpered as you gripped a handful of Suguru's hair, your lips moving against his as you rocked back against Gojo. "M-mmm yes, Toru~ I need that so bad! Fuck me back to my senses, please!!."

Watching his best friend so shamelessly fuck up into you like you were flash had him growling. He swapped your ass before pressing his cock further inside of you, stretching you out. "Don't worry, baby, we'll put you back in your place, won’t we, Suguru?”

“Fuck yeah, we will.” Suguru huffed out as he nipped and sucked at your neck, marking you up, so there would be no doubt who you belonged to when you left the basement. “We’ll make sure to get those senses back in line.”

You felt dizzy as both your boyfriends were fucking into you as fast and as hard as they could, not giving you a break in the slightest. They were treating you like the brat you had been all night. "I-I feel so full." You said in a begging tone. "Toru feels good! Fuck!” Suguri looked up at you with a guttural growl as he grabbed your thighs, driving his cock up inside you.

"Princess~ are tot nnngh so good for your daddy’s, the rest of the night?~" Suguru growled in your ear before pulling back to watch the blissful expression on Satoru’s face as he fucked you hard.

You take your bottom lip between your teeth, biting it hard as you nod. Gasping as Satoru nipped and suckled at your shoulders. "Y-Yeah~ I can be a good girl for my daddies!!" Your eyes watered at the dual and rough sensation of being so full and fucked mercilessly. “I'll be good! I’ll be a good girl, I promise!”

Suguru groaned as he felt Satoru thrust in and out with him, their cocks pressed up against each other through your thin walls. Making it feel good for all of you. You cried and begged for more. Finding this double penetration is less like a punishment and more like a reward for you. For a second, you thought maybe you should act up more from now on. Both of them picked up on your pleasure, and they chuckled as they pressed kisses all over you before starting a pace that they both immediately picked up on, their cocks plunging into you desperately.

It wasn’t soft at all. It was fast and hard, and they were fucking you as hard as they could. You can barely handle it anymore as you grab onto Suguru’s shoulders. "Oh fuck~ d-daddies!!" your pussy and ass throbbed around them, lips pressed together, as she cried out. “G-Getting close!” Both groaned loudly as you continued to throb. They sped up, growling and moaning as they rut up against each other.

"Do you even deserve to cum?" Suguru panted, a dark brow cocked.

"Yeah, maybe we should just edge you all night,” Satoru added, smirking as you made a cute little sound of protest, which made his eyes roll back.

“N-No! Please, I’ll be good! Let me please, please!!”

“What do you think, Satoru?”

“Hmm, I don't know, Suguru.”

You whimper, and it’s so pathetic and weak but also cute at the same fucking time. “Please!!” Tears stream down your cheeks as you scream for them to show mercy. And seeing those tears ruin the perfect makeup you had worked so long on is what they were waiting for.

“Cum for us,” Suguru growls, losing all of his control as he fucks you deeper and harder, bruising your cervix almost.

“Cum on, Sweetheart~ cum for us, baby!”

You screamed in pleasure as you came hard. Squirting on Suguru as you convulse around Satoru. Your dark-haired boyfriend in maroon scrubs groaned needly, his hips stuttering as he felt his load fill you up; his head was thrown back, and all he could focus on was your sweet tight pussy. While Satoru, on the other hand, was fucking feral as he slammed into your ass a few more times before growling, nearly roaring out loud in pleasure, as he gripped your hips, slamming home one last time before cumming inside your ass.

Time to stop as the three of you lay there, panting heavily, recovering from the intensity of your orgasms. But for your boyfriend, don’t stop as nearly long as it stops for you because, in an instant, you’re flipped onto your back. You blink several times, trying to process what’s going on as your afterglow fades.

“W-What are you—nngh!!” you arch off the sofa as Suguru positions and stuff between your legs, instantly eating your pussy out. “Fuck!!” you fingers, tangle, and strands of hair as Satoru wraps his long, pretty fingers around your neck, gently, squeezing off your air supply. “Haaah~ fuck Toru?”

“Or did you seriously think a little double penetration was gonna be your punishment?” he laughed right in your face, and it was full of humor and darkness that had your legs closing around Suguru’s head. “Ohh, sweetheart, you’re in for a long fucking night.”

“But you’re in good hands with us,” Suguru adds before flicking his tongue over your clit. “Trust us~ we’re doctors for tonight, princess.”

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@candy-s72

[icarusredwings]

Toast

(Yeah, he got the hello kitty toaster)

Sfw poolverinessa sick-ficlet

Cw: implied past eating disorder and cancer related puking

Vanessa never really knew why, but some days, Wade ate a lot of toast. Sometimes half a loaf. He would visit the bathroom often and come back smelling clean. Minty or lemon scented.

He'd smile and say "Why not? I like toast." When asked why but secretly she wondered if there was more to it.

It wasn't until Logan came around that she finally figured it out.

Here, in the morning, Wade had toast for breakfast. Simple really. Just two slices with jam. She had noticed Logan's gestures moved away from the lunch plans they were talking about.

"What about that place on 6th street?" He has said before, but now was suggesting a movie marathon at home.

What had changed? Within a wordless instant, they had taken lunch off the table.

"Maybe for dinner?" She asks, getting a curious look from Logan and a smile from Wade. Subtle enough to be unnoticeable if you hadn't been with him for the last 10 years.

"Yeah! Maybe. I heard they take reservations, though." Was all that was said, but Vanessa squinted, peering into those deep yellows, searching for any sort of falsification.

"Yeah... maybe." She repeats, only for him to glance back at Logan, taking a big bite of the toast. "So what movies are we gonna watch? Whatever you want. I'm not picky." Wade says, another sharp bite.

"What? Oh yes, you are." The scuff man smirks. "You're prissier than a lil miss pretty in pink pagent show."

"And I think you've been spending too much time with Rouge." Wade giggled. "What do you think V?"

"I think hes right. You ARE prissy and petty... And pathetic."

"Oi, you love pathetic men." He says, shoving the rest of the toaste in his mouth, jam falling down his chin.

Rolling her eyes, Vanessa kisses his lips, licking the jelly off. "That I do.. and you smell.. different." The tone it's said in is suspicious. Because it kinda was.

"I changed my body wash. This one's supposed to be gentle on skin. Wolvie said it would be better for me, but I think it smells like ass."

"It's irratant free." Logan budded in, taking a sip of his soda. "Which includes those perfumes."

"Look peanut, you might be able to get away with being all naturel with your manly wolvie musk but I smell like death." Wade says, eating the other toast.

"That's kind of an insult to Death, isn't it?" She asks, shifting to grab the remote, scrolling through their options.

"Oh definitely. She smells like fresh bloomed flowers after it rains." He mutters, filled with longing and well- Toast.

"Well, don't go dying on us just to see her, 'kay bub?" It's taken as a jabe, this serious statment was. As all things were to Wade, who only laughs, getting up.

"Yeah, yeah. Alright, you two choose. Don't have too much fun without me." He says, heading off to the bathroom.

Hm. Nothing seems out of place just yet. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but she had a feeling something was wrong.

When Wade returned, he smelt of artifical mint and that gross cheap spray that gas stations used in their bathroom. The lemon kind that smelled more like chemicals then actual lemons.

Ood, but not unusual. Maybe they just got minty bar soap. Who knows. Though she didn't remember seeing any.. huh.

____

Later, just as they were starting the second movie, Logan had brought a big bowl of buttery pop corn and again a plate of toast. This time buttered.

"Hold on. I gotta go to the bathroom again. You know. Kidney cancer shit. Go ahead and start without me." Wade says, waving them off as he leaves.

Blinking, for a second, Vanessa wondered. This was his 6th time going to the bathroom already and not every time, but most times, he would be in there for a good couple of minutes.

"Is he okay?" She asked Logan, who shrugged, having the toast in his lap, holding it. "About as okay as he'll ever be I guess."

"Soo no. Got it.. hey, can I ask you something?" Vanessa scoots a little closer, quieting down her voice as the starting credits play on the tv.

"If it's what I think, the awnser is no."

"What? No! Not that. God... men. I was gonna ask.. Why does Wade eat so much toast? Doesn't it give him a stomach ache? I thought he was allergic to gluten for a while." She adds, whispering.

Logan now tilts his head, giving her a stupid look only to soften into a 'Oh yeah' expression. "Right.. not everyone has my nose. My bad. Wade eats a bunch of toast because it settles and soaks up his stomach acid. Mentioned something about 'it's better to have something to throw up then nothing at all' too, which I hope is about the stomach cancer and not.. nevermind." He waves his hand, shaking his head. "It's true, though. Trust me, I've threw up a ton as a kid, and it was always better to have something in there."

"So... every time he..." She gestures to the bathroom vaugey with her hand. "He's.. puking?"

"Yeh.. kind of suprised you didn't know already. Though.. I guess it makes sense." Logan mutters, thinking.

"He's been hiding it from me.." It's a statement as if realizing this on her own, now processing.

"It's not really your fault. He physically can't hide it from me.. I can smell it. I can smell him crying and hear him brushing his teeth too." He mutters, looking at the bathroom door, that now clicks open and out comes a freshly cleaned up Wade, smiling that fake, appeasing grin.

Vanessa goes silent about the subject, only scooting back over and patting his seat between them. "You're just in luck. The movie just started."

Coming over, Wade sits between them, pulling his feet up to tuck under Logan's ass with a cheeky grin.

"Here. Eat." He mutters, handing the toast plate to Wade, who immediately begins to eat it.

"Ooh! Wolvie you salted it like I like!" He coes, shifting to lean agaisnt him, nuzzling his cheek.

"Mhm. I remember. Also... Vanessa wants to ask you something."

Her eyes widden, looking at Logan with that 'bitch!?' Look only to smile nervously, brows going together in a sense of tensity.

"Yes!" Wade boarderline chants.

"No! Not that! God.. you both are disgusting. I... I wanted to ask... Why did you feel the need to hide it from me-"

"Hide what? He immediately asks, cutting her off.

"The fact that you're throwing up........again.."

The volume of the pause is deafening. Enough for Wade's fake grin to drop, instantly turning to Logan as if he had just cut his heart out and sold it to the goverment (fuck the goverment, a voice echoed in his head)

"Why did you- i-.. I don't know what you're talking about." He laughs, forcibly.

Both of his partners stare at him, quiet and not finding this behavior any funny.

"I'm not! Ness I-i don't-"

"Wade..." Logan mutters, giving him a look.

Tearing up, Wade shifts, tensing and holds his plate tight. "B-but I'm not!!... not like that. I-i swear! I-..." a couple tears fall down his cheeks as Logan rubs his back, taking the chance of being injured. "Logan helped me get better."

This confession hurts to say. Ness knows it. The way his voice tightened and how panicked he got.

"That's.. not what I meant, sweetie."

"Oh...OH.. well fuck.. I- c-Cause it's fucking disgusting?? Why would I want you to worry 'bout me anyway? I don't need anyon' to carry my burdens for me. I can do it myself. A-and look mighty sexy doing it!" He says, wiping his eyes and sniffling, seeming to stop crying now that it was clarified.

"He's right about that last bit.. how you make insane seem sexy is beyond me." The flirt from Logan makes Wade smile, which is all that was needed at the moment.

"Pfft- like you're one to talk.."

"Wade, Sweetheart. You are not a burden and neither is your bullshit. Logan might have married you first but your bullshit is still my bullshit. Yeah?"

"V, I'm already the phyco guy who looks like half raw half burnt bacon, okay? I don't need to be known as 'the guy that pukes all the time' too."

She blinks, a little taken aback. "..Is that how you think we see you?" Taking his hands, she starts to talk, but Logan interrupts.

"That's a lot of words for 'Sexy motherfucker with a big mouth and nice ass' but sure. Potato patato."

Smiling again, Wade giggles. "Sttoopp... dont stop."

"I won't. But you gotta litsen to her yeah? Or shes gonna go all dommy mommy on you and make you write those affermations again."

"Fuckin' hated that..." Wade mutters, letting her thumbs rub over his rough backroad like hands, over his knuckles and up his wrists.

"And I'll do it again. You look at me and you listen good. You are way more to me then you will ever know. You are ever changing. Evolving. So is my love for you. No, you don't have to tell me every little thing, but telling me you don't feel good shouldn't feel like being a burden. Got it?"

"Mhm.." Wade was looking away, not wanting to look her in the eyes. No, because then he would be forced to see all the truth love in her eyes, proof against all the lies that his mind has made him believe.

"Wade Winston Wilson-" She states.

"Shit... you didn't have to goverment name me.." He whines, looking at her, seeing deep into her soul. She was telling the truth. She loved him. Bullshit and all.

Tearing up again, he makes a whimper sound, lips curling into the biggest frown. "Y-you mean it?"

"Of course I do.. you don't have to hide what's going on, baby.... now come lay on my tits and watch a medicore overhyped movie." She grins, shifting to let Wade curl into her, an arm wrapped around him, petting his head.

Logan scoots closer, putting an arm around them both, Holding the popcorn, smiling. Finally. Someone had shoved some sense into that stupid head of his. Maybe now he'd stop lying about having to pee so much.

Settling into their cuddle pile, Wade fells better, the toast filling his stomach, love in his heart, and eyes dry.

".....I have to puke again." He mutters, not even an entire 45 seconds of being in their grasp.

Both Vanessa and Logan sigh, letting him get up. "At this point just bring the trashcan, bub."

"I would, buuut you might mistake it for me-"

"Damn it, Wade!!"

[thelov3lybookworm]

I Didn't Ask For This (part ten)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Summary: Marriage had always been something sacred to little Y/n, something dream like, where her husband would come and whisk her away to a fairyland. At least, that's what she had always thought.

All her dreams would be shattered.

But maybe she can salvage them?

•○●⛦●○•

Tw: forced marriage, none more that I can think of, so let me know if I need to add anything.

A/n: I really love this chapter. Let's see if you can find the reference I made in here. I honestly make so many references in the fics I write, but no one has noticed them.

Anyways, enjoy!

•○🌑○•

The tension in the air could have been cut by a blunt knife.

The most powerful High Lord in the history of Prythian was staring down one of the most feared man in Prythian, the Spymaster of the Night Court.

They were nearly chest to chest, and Y/n feared that if someone didn't step in, this place would be bathed in blood. So she cleared her throat.

Azriel looked at her, brows furrowed.

"I– can we go back? Can you take me back?"

"Sure–" As he began to turn to her, the High Lord's hand shot out, clamping down on his shoulders. Azriel glared at the hand and then it's owner.

"Cassian can take her back. Or if its him you want to go with, please wait for sometime." Rhys glanced at her while saying the second part. "My office. Now." He threw at Azriel before stalking out of the room.

Everyone watched him go, a muscle feathering in Azriel's jaw as he turned to her. "Don't worry about me. I'll be there soon." With that, he turned and followed Rhys.

Y/n's stomach turned as she thought about what could happen to Azriel. The high lord was said to be ruthless and cunning, and even though he hadn't seemed like it when they first met, she didn't know if she could sit still until she was sure that her husband was safe. The urge to follow him and make sure he wouldn't be harmed was overpowering any sense she had, but before she could take a step, Cassian placed a hand on her shoulder.

He tilted his head towards the door, and she nodded. Glancing back one last time to where Azriel had disappeared, she followed Cassian outside.

She stayed quiet the whole time, muttering a thanks to Cassian when they landed before locking herself in her room.

She couldn't stop thinking about Azriel and what he'd done today. Allegedly done today.

She changed into her nightgown, climbing into bed hoping to sleep. Maybe then her mind would stop trying to find some meaning in his actions. Maybe then her heart would stop trying to make her feel things she didn't want to feel.

•○🌑○•

It had been almost more than an hour now, and Y/n couldn't sleep no matter what she did. With a huff of annoyance, she threw the covers aside and stood, stomping to the balcony and leaning against the railing. Her minds inability to just shut the hell up was frustrating.

As her mind drifted through the plethora of thoughts in her head again, she couldn't help but think back to where Azriel might be right now. Was he back yet? He would come to meet her if he was, right?

As soon as she had those thoughts, she heard the familiar scuff of boots coming near, and her chest started loosening. From the sound of it, the door opened and closed behind her, but she didn't turn. She couldn't, because she knew if she did, she wouldn't be able to stop herself from throwing her arms around him and slapping him at the same time. She wondered which she would prefer.

She could feel him coming closer, and she gripped the railing tightly.

"Are you mad at me?" He asked quietly, having stopped a little distance away.

She shook her head. "Did you really do it?"

A pause. "Yes."

She nodded, not knowing what to say to that. He took that as a cue to step forward. She knew he did because one moment her back was cold, and the next, she could feel his body heat through the thin silk of her gown. Suddenly she felt extremely exposed, considering the thing she was wearing barely reached her knee, and it was only held up by thin strings.

She inwardly cursed Nesta for this. Y/n had never worn something like this, and when she and Nesta had started to become friends, Nesta was appaled when she realised Y/n did not sleep half naked.

"Do you have nothing to say to that?" Azriel asked, his body like a furnace behind her.

"What do you want me to say?"

"How– how do you feel about all of this?"

"I don't know..."

"Does it bother you?"

She shook her head. "No, it does not. But what about the women and children?"

"They were evacuated to safety. And your brother, he's here."

At that, she finally turned slightly to look at him. She hadn't even thought of her brother who lived in the camp. She didn't have to worry about Velda as she lived in a different camp.

Azriel towered over her, studying her.

"What?"

"He is living in an inn across the Sidra."

"Really?" When he nodded, relief spread through her. She mumbled a thank you before turning back to the view in front of her.

"Your....your father is alive."

She stiffened. "What?" She whispered.

"He burned in the fire, but I just felt like he didn't suffer enough for his crimes." He stated casually, as if he was telling her about the weather.

She blinked at the night sky before asking the same question again.

"I bought him here. He is where we keep all the prisoners and I... interrogate them. He is badly injured and won't be able to escape. I wanted to ask you before I did anything to him."

She knew exactly what he meant with that.

"What did you want to ask."

"You were the one who suffered from his ministrations. You deserve the right to punish him however you want. You can either let him live, give him a quick death or let me handle him."

"What would letting you handle him entail?"

"I'll go all Spymaster on him. I'll do all the things I do to the prisoners to get information out of them."

She nodded. Thinking for some time, she finally decided. "Then I'll let you handle him."

He was silent for a moment. "Are you sure?"

"I am."

His hands landed on either side of her on the railing as he leaned closer. "Thank you." Butterflies erupted in her stomach as he kissed her shoulder before straightening. "Come, you should sleep."

She turned to him, and ignoring her mind, she followed her heart's urge to wrap her arms around her husband. He froze for a moment before wrapping an arm around her shoulder and using the other to cradle the back of her head.

"Thank you. You didn't need to do this." She mumbled against his chest.

"I absolutely did." She pulled back from him. He smiled and kissed her forehead before tugging her back into the room.

As she lay down and he arranged the covers around her, a thought suddenly occurred to her.

"Azriel? Your father and brothers lived in the camp too. What happened to them?"

He gave her a smile, and honestly she should have been scared of it. But she wasn't, and that scared her more than anything else did.

"They're dead."

"Did you see them?"

"Yes. And it gave me immense satisfaction."

"Wish I could have witnessed it."

He blinked at her, a slow smile spreading on his face. He pushed her hair back from her face as he straightened. "Hmm. Next time I do something like this, I'll make sure to take you with me."

She grinned, just a little bit, shaking her head. He stared at her for a few moments before nodding his head and turning away. "Good night."

She didn't want him to go. Atleast, not yet.

She had only a moment to make her choice, and she did.

Her heart danced with joy while her mind screamed at her that this was a bad idea.

"Azriel." She burst out before she lost her nerve.

He paused, turning back slightly. "Yes?"

"Can you– can you stay?"

He stared at her. "What? You– you want me to stay?"

Instantly, a blush was climbing up her neck. What if he didn't want to stay? She kicked herself mentally. "Only if you wish to–"

"I do." His eyes shone. "Um– do you want me to sleep on the ground? I have no problem with it."

She shook her head. "Stay next to me. Please."

The room was dark, the only light provided by the moonlight filtering in from the doors of the balcony. She almost couldn't see the flush on his neck and face as he rounded the bed, where a few clothes had appeared. He took them and walked into the bathing chamber to change.

When he walked back out he was dressed in loose pants and shirt. He slowly climbed into the bed. He was as stiff as a plank with tension as he lay as far as he could from her.

She smiled and turned on her back. "You can relax you know. You'll never get any sleep if you're that tensed up."

He sighed. "I know."

She bit her lip. "I don't bite...much."

His head whipped to her. And honestly, she agreed. She wasn't bold in any way. She didn't even know where that came from.

"Tell me about something interesting."

"Velaris was built by Rhys's father." He supplied.

"Really? Wasn't he..."

"Cruel? A monster? That he was. But he did build and protect Velaris. The only good thing he did, honestly."

"What was he like?"

Azriel began telling her about the previous High Lord of Night Court, and she listened, her attention rapt. As moments passed, his voice filling the room, he relaxed gradually. He also told her about Cassian's past and his mother.

When he was done, they stayed silent. She processed all the information that had just been dumped on her. She shivered.

"Are you cold?"

"A little."

"Would you accept an olive branch?" She nodded and he pulled her closer. Now she was as stiff as a board.

"Relax. I don't bite...much." He murmured against her hair.

She sat up abruptly. "Was that a joke Spymaster?"

He grinned, pulling her back to his chest. "Maybe." After a pause, he went on. "Sleep. I won't try anything. No funny business unless you ask for it."

"Shame." She mumbled under her breath.

"Did you say something Y/n?"

Of course the bastard heard her. "No."

"I feel like Nesta is a really bad influence on you."

"Shut up." She shoved his chest lightly. He just kissed her head and wished her a good night.

As she drifted off, she felt safer than she had felt in her whole existence. She knew he would protect her always, no matter what.

And maybe that should have scared her, but it just made her feel warm and happy, making something in her chest sing.

•○🌑○•

Part 11

Taglist: @bubybubsters @maxxieluvs @bubbbllee @buckyandgeraltsupremacy @waytoomanyteenagefeels @tell-me-a-poem @the-lake-is-calling @spaxxxi @japanese-wonderland-blog @valeridarkness @moonlwghts @deadratio @esposadomd @harrystylesfan2686 @missusbarnes-rogers @whatthefuckshappeningrn @hyacinthoideshispanica @historygeekqueen @lizziesfirstwife @nastynesta @aroseinvelaris @nightless @cleverzonkwombatsludge @kodokunarisu-blog @selillusion @eos-princess @moonfawnx @a-court-of-milkandhoney @emilyo-218 @wannabewolf @ailyr92 @chronically-online-cheese @myheartfollower @hells-sluttiest-new-arrival @marina468 @menaosama @starryhiraeth @hereticdance @mali22 @valencia-rou @azrielsstarlight @marvelouslovely-barnes @luvmoo @starlight-hope @a-frog-with-a-laptop @fall-myriad @alt-ghost @elleofdragons @ruleroftides @5moremin @stargirl1714 @bunnymallowo @ivy-34 @aria-chikage

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Old Scars, New Blood 4

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, manipulation, borderline bullying, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Reader has accepted that she’ll never be wanted, not only by the man she’s crushed on for years, but by anyone. That is until a new player enters the game. (f!, short!reader)

Character: Lloyd Hansen, Thor Odinson

Note: Still sick but going to have to work.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all. Take care. 💖

With meal prep complete, you return to Lloyd’s office to find it empty. The remnants of his earlier spill remain speckled over the desk and floor. You clean it up, leaving a lemony fresh scent in your stead. While you’re at it, you tidy up the bookshelves.

You hesitate on your way to the door. You glance over your shoulder as something tickles in your head. You still don’t get why Lloyd didn’t tell you about Valhalla. For months, he hid that from you. You think about that day in the car and being left on the side of the road. Maybe he’s been planning to cut ties with you for a while.

You stare at the large iMac. It would be wrong to snoop. Even if it isn’t his redeeming quality, you’ve always been honest with Lloyd. You’re just confused. He’s never anything less than straightforward so if he’s going to fire you, why hasn’t he just pulled the trigger?

Maybe… you know too much. That sends a shiver through you. It may actually end with shots fired.

“There she is,” Lloyd interrupts your inner turmoil and you whip around to face him. He’s freshly showered and styled. You can smell the specialty oil he puts in his mustache, “the fuck are you doing in here?”

“Cleaning,” you reply quickly.

“Looks pretty fucking spotless,” he tosses keys at you and you flinch, catching them against your chest, “I need a ride.”

“Um, I can get Jackie–”

“He drives like an old man,” he retorts, spinning on his heel as he snaps his fingers, “chop, chop, kid.”

You swallow your agitation. Usually, you’re better at it. Today you just find him grating. Maybe you’re just a bit sore about him leaving you on the highway. Well, get over it, he’s not apologising.

You follow him with the keys in your hand. He’s several paces ahead of you as you scurry to keep up. His stride is tense as he opens and closes his fists.

As you come outside, you hear a whistle. Lloyd peers over and scuffs to halt as he faces Thor. The large blond bounds over, a shirt with only one button done up displaying most of his chest. He looks over Lloyd’s shoulder and his cheek dimples.

“Running away?”

“Business,” Lloyd says flatly, “I’ll be back.”

“What about my business?” Thor challenges. Lloyd doesn’t respond. “Relax,” he slaps Lloyd’s arm, “I’m ragging on you. Tonight, we will share some of your scotch, eh? Get you nice and loose.”

“Mm,” Lloyd grumbles, “we’ll see.”

“The little one prefers wine, I think,” Thor points over Lloyd’s shoulder, “oh, and she has quite the sweet tooth, eh? You must know that.”

“Whatever. She’s the assistant. Her job is to worry about what I like,” Lloyd sneers, “don’t wait up.”

He turns back towards the car and you send an apologetic smile past him. Thor smirks and winks, flicking his tongue out lasciviously. You blanch and swiftly follow Lloyd.

You still don’t believe what he said in the kitchen. Not only that he said it but that he meant it. You’re certain it’s all just a part of this pissing match between the men. Thor keeps stepping onto Lloyd’s territory, he’ll keep going till he gets bit. You don’t how much longer Lloyd can hold out.

Lloyd’s in the passenger’s seat of the SUV before you even get to the door. You open it and swing yourself in. You hate how big all these vehicles are. You shove the keys in the slot and turn the engine. You shift in the seat and slide your phone out of your pocket, placing it in the cup holder.

You check the time then the mirrors. It’s not unusual for Lloyd to head out later in the day but you didn’t have anything on the agenda. You know better than to ask questions. That’s what he liked about you, if he likes anything about you.

“Would you just fucking drive?” Lloyd growls.

You wince and shift into gear. You look behind you then ahead of you. Thor watches you as you ease into reverse. Or maybe he’s watching Lloyd…

You roll the wheel and turn towards the gate. Lloyd takes out his phone and slumps in the seat as he scrolls and taps. You steer through the gate and pull out onto the road. You don’t even know if you should ask where to go.

“Head northeast,” he says.

Right. You take his direction and turn onto the ramp onto the highway. He grumbles at his phone but says nothing else until you have to get into the exit lane. What is he up to?

You head into the city and he directs you through the main row where much of the nightlife thrives. You’ve been there many times before. He isn’t shy about his nocturnal activities. He commands you past his typical spot.

When he points you into the lot behind a Hilton, you frown. Is he that desperate to get away from Thor? You don’t say a word as you idle by the back wall.

“Right,” he doesn’t look up from his phone as he undoes his seat belt, “I’ll be a while.”

You look over at him confused. What does he mean?

“I’m sure you can keep yourself entertained,” he pokes his tongue out as he smirks at his phone. You catch the glimpse of a chat, a picture sent of a woman in a thong. You cringe and grip the wheel.

“I’ll just go back to the compound–”

“You’ll stay the fuck here,” he tears his eyes from the cell and jabs his finger at you, “you need to remember who the fuck you work for, kid.”

You say nothing as he opens the door and drops out of the SUV. You know this side of Lloyd. His ego is bruised. It happens after rough missions or when an agent gets mouthy. It’s worse now since he can’t do much about his problem. 

He slams the door behind him and you watch him march towards the entrance. You sigh and roll down the windows before you shut off the engine. There’s no use in wasting gas for who knows how long. You’re certain if you get bored, you’ll have enough time to get a coffee down the block.

You grab your phone and shuffle through several apps. You can’t focus on any of the time-eating games you keep for when you’re restless. You have nothing else to distract you. Your sister hasn’t answered the text you sent her a week ago and Lloyd is busy.

You open up your downloaded series and turn on the same show you’ve seen a dozen times before. Still, you’re not paying attention. You don’t think Lloyd is here for business. It really shouldn’t matter to you but it feels extra humiliating to have to wait outside while he does…whatever.

You turn off the show and let the car go silent. You adjust the seat to recline and close your eyes. You’re exhausted. All the chaos has got the best of you. 

Your phone vibes before you can get cozy. It’s Lloyd. You tap the preview so it expands.

‘Need lube. Ten minutes.’

You scoff. Is he serious? Your heart shrivels up as your stomach turns. He’s punishing you. Not because you did anything but because he can’t punish Thor. You’re so so tired.

You grip the wheel and stare at the phone. You wonder if he knows? Is this why he’s doing this? All these years, talking about his escapades, you just assumed it was his usual crassness. He talks like that with everyone. If he’s not boasting about killing, it’s fucking.

Either way, he knows what he’s doing. This is low. You are low.

You open up maps and search for a shop nearby. You fix the seat and pull out, driving numbly as you follow the automated voice directing you through the street. You park without paying attention and get out, nearly stumbling from the height of the SUV’s lift.

You stroll inside the shop with its blackened windows and enter with your head down. Your eyes scan furtively as you search for your goal. The task is made more difficult as the flesh toned silicon and shameless displays set you on fire.

“Hello, hon, can I help you find something?” The man behind the counter asks.

“Er,” you cross your arms, “lube.”

“Alrighty, are we looking for flavoured? Water-based? Oil?”

You blanch as he rounds the counter and strides towards a rack. You shrug and trail after him. You see a black bottle with cherries on it.

“That’s fine,” you pluck one off the shelf and quickly retreat to the counter. “Credit.”

You bring up your card on your phone and tap. The man behind the counter tries to break the tension but you’re not listening. You shove the receipt in your pocket and swipe up the bottle and leave.

Back in the truck, you have to hold back from screaming. What are you doing? You don’t need this shit. Why do you keep bending over backwards for Lloyd when you don’t have a chance? Why have you wasted a decade hoping for nothing?

Because, you don’t have any other options.

You turn the car on and roll out of the lot. You make your way back to the hotel in a haze. You check your phone. He sent the room number and nothing else. You walk into the hotel, ignoring the front desk clerk, and wait for the elevator. You step onto it and watch the doors shut.

You get off and follow the signs to the exact door plaque. You knock with your knuckles, your hand fisted around the bottle. You hear giggling. It’s more than one woman. Footsteps approach the other side.

A woman in an open robe opens the door. She has dark wavy hair and smeared lipstick. Lloyd growls in the background as you glimpse his naked ass.

“Hurry up, sugar tits,” he calls, “I’m starting to chafe.”

You shove the bottle at the woman and drop it. You don’t wait to see if she catches it. You spin on your heel and you’re gone. Your eyes fill with hot tears. Tears like acid. Tears of stupidity.

When you get back to the car, you keel over the steering wheel and heave. You don’t hate Lloyd. You hate yourself. You need to cut it out but somehow, you just can’t. He’s the worst person you know and yet, you want him so badly.

❤️‍🩹

As the sky darkens, you get out of the SUV to stretch your legs. You pace around and check the time. You don’t want to get back in the car. Instead, you wander down the street to the coffee kiosk you drove by earlier. You get an Americano and drag your feet back up the pavement.

You stand outside the SUV and sip from the cup. You chew the paper brim anxiously and look at your phone. Another car door opens and closes.

“Candy?” A man approaches.

You look up, the glow of your face making the stranger nothing more than a dark shadow, “not me,” you back up and press your phone to your chest.

“Oh, sorry,” he puts his hands up, “thought you were someone else.”

You shake your head as he turns and wanders off. You’re not entirely sure how he mistook you for a prostitute. That is what he thought, isn’t it? Candy? Sounds pretty tasty.

You get back in the SUV and lock the doors. You put your phone in the cup holder and it flashes. A message. You don’t bother reading it. You tap your fingers on the console and close your eyes, sipping from the warm cup.

A knock on the other window startles you. You turn on the light and see Lloyd peering in. He winks and tugs on the handle. You hit the locks and sit up.

He gets in and lets out a sigh, “ahh, I feel good.”

You don’t say a word as you slip your cup into the empty holder beside your phone. You start the car and press the gas. As you come to the exit, Lloyd yawns and stretches his arm between the seats, gripping yours above your shoulder.

“I’m fucking starving, let’s hit a burger joint,” he says as he rubs his stomach, “you don’t think I would be with how much I ate.”

He cackles and you bite down. You don’t understand it. He repulses you and yet there’s that sharp pang in your chest.

“You see the tits on Kasia? Fucking pert–”

You veer onto the next street and he hits the door with the motion, “hey, be fucking careful.” He shifts in his seat as he touches his crotch, “I’m tender.”

You sniff and pull into the drive through. You stop by the menu, “what do you want?”

“Get me some of that honey chicken and some rings. Extra honey sauce for the rings. Oh, and a sprite.”

“Sure,” you answer as you drive up to the speaker. You recite his order and the fuzzy response tells you to drive up to the window.

“What’s up? You’re not hungry?”

“I’m fine,” you insist.

“Aw, you on another diet,” he taunts, “bone broth?”

“No,” you answer flatly.

“I’m not sharing my rings,” he says.

“I don’t want any,” you insist.

“You’re fucking testy,” he accuses as you pay.

“I’m tired,” you utter and roll up to the pick-up.

“You’re tired? Fuck, my back is aching from all that thrusting.”

“Would you stop?” You snap before you can stop yourself, “I don’t want to hear about your dick anymore.”

He snorts and sits up straight, “excuse me, kid?”

“I don’t care,” you reach over and give a blunt thanks to the drive-thru worker as you take the paper bag. “Why don’t you shut up and eat?"

You shove the bag in his lap then take the cup and move your phone to plant it firmly in the holder. You follow through the lane and back onto the street. The silence is still and stolid around you.

“If you wanted to join in, you just had to say–”

“No,” you snip. You know he’s not serious, he’s teasing you. You’re a joke to him. “No, I don’t want that.” You grip the wheel tight and bite down until your jaw hurts, “I don’t want you.”

He inhales and blows it out heavily through his nose. The bag crinkles as he opens it and reaches inside, unleashing the smell of chicken that makes your stomach rage. You ignore the discomfort and focus on the road.

“Learn to take a fucking joke, kid,” he snickers, “maybe then, you’ll catch a dick or two.”

[hopelessromantic5]

Because that last one was so short, here’s a merthur clip with a hopeful ending for Morgana.

Morgana thinks she’s captured Merlin, when really he’s allowed himself to be captured so maybe Arthur would be smart enough to just stay away this time.

He was wrong. As is usually the case with Arthur.

Arthur knew he’d found the right place when he heard Merlin’s anguish audibly ground out of him, followed by Morgana’s cackle.

The shack was only a half days walk from Camelot.

How could she have thought Arthur would not find them?

Maybe that was the point.

“I don’t understand it, Merlin. You’re nothing but Arthur’s servant, yet time and again you’ve proven yourself willing to lay down your life for him. Why?” Arthur was inching closer to the broken window, not making a single sound. Not a rustling leaf or a toe scuff in the dirt.

He carefully peered around the window pane, only to be met with the most horrifying sight he’d witnessed in years. Merlin, hands chained to the roof, dangling there like a fish, was bruised and bloodied. But he was still Merlin.

Arthur almost vomited on the spot from relief at finding him alive, or from pure disgust and rage at the state he was in.

Arthur would never let that beautiful bumbling fool out of his sight again.

Suddenly Merlin jerked his head up, where it had been hanging low, eyes on the ground.

He spat, what looked like a mouthful of blood, in the direction of the Morgana, who was circling his body like a vulture waiting for its next meal to die.

“I preferred the beating to your incessant rambling.” He groaned out.

Arthur had never heard Merlin speak like this to anyone before.

The King Regent’s manservant was like the moon. And there was always a side that Arthur couldn’t fully see, he couldn’t get it into the light just right, couldn’t put his finger on it.

Perhaps this version of Merlin, is connected to that side of him.

The hair on the back of Arthur’s neck stood on its end.

Another cackle followed his statement.

“I rather think I’ve hit a nerve, dear Merlin. Don’t want me acknowledging your beloved Prince Arthur? I wonder why?”

She was playing mind games with Merlin, she’d done similar to Arthur when they were teenagers, he swore, at one point, that she could read minds.

Fortunately, Merlin is much wiser than Arthur gives him credit for. He doesn’t rise to the bait.

He chuckles low and deep, Arthur would be a bit scared if he didn’t know that a little bunny of a person lived in that same skin, in that same mind.

“That’s King Arthur, to you. Or haven’t you heard? Your invitation to the coronation must’ve gotten lost on its way.” He clicked his tongue, in that annoying, pestering way. “A shame really, it’s supposed to be the celebration of the century.”

Arthur almost wanted to laugh.

“My brother will get what’s coming to him. I’d bet my hands that he’s on his way here, now.” She smiled that sickly sweet thing with all her rotting teeth. “Stumbling around in the woods, calling out your name, and all he will find is empty air. And this quaint little shack.”

“If you think the son of Uther Pendragon is going to abandon his castle to come searching for someone like me, you’re sorely mistaken. As you said yourself, high priestess, I am nothing but his servant. Perhaps you should’ve strategized a bit wiser.”

“Your falsehoods cannot alter what I have seen with my own eyes. Arthur has never deigned to care about anyone, noble or peasant, the way he seems to care about you.” As Morgana spoke, she dragged the tip of a sharp dagger across his blood-muddied flesh. Shredding his tunic down the middle as she trailed its edge across the expanse of his chest.

“That’s not true, Morgana. He cared about you.”

Arthur nearly flinched, as he expected Merlin to get a nasty response. But it was almost as if something flickered. She froze, momentarily, staring Merlin directly into his eyes, yet seeing something else entirely.

As quickly as a little flame of home lit on his heart, it was snuffed out.

“Arthur is no different to his father, he cares only for himself!”

“Well now you’re just contradicting yourself, my lady.” Even from the distance, Arthur saw the look appear upon Merlin���s face. He was puzzled, eyes narrowed and calculating as he tried to figure out the problem. Maybe Merlin sensed exactly what Arthur had always felt upon meeting his sister in the last year, that she was not his sister. Not entirely.

“Morgana would know better than that. Madness or not. You are not Morgana are you?” Merlin peered at her, if you looked close enough, you’d see the golden burning in them. But Arthur decided that it was a trick of the light, as he had every other instance accidentally witnessing Merlin’s magic. He took a big deep breath and wordlessly thanked the gods it was him that saw, and no one else.

“You-“ Morgana was startled, stumbled back and fell on nothing but air.

“Yes. And you are a nothing but an empty shell that’s been filled with your sister’s hate.” The chains holding Merlin to the ceiling fell away, he fell to his knees, legs too weak to hold him. Arthur wanted to run in and help him but he wanted to see what Merlin was planning.

“She’s locked your humanity away in the dark. Hidden from you.” He shook his head. “I am sorry I did not see it sooner. I might’ve saved us both heartache.” Slowly, he reached out and gently took her hand. To Arthur’s surprise, she did not pull away.

“Will you allow me to help you?”

The air was thick for three heartbeats before she nodded, Arthur could tell that something, in that moment, was purely Morgana. The Morgana he had known since he was eleven years old. It had emerged from its hiding place long enough to go willingly. Perhaps Merlin had found a weak link in the chain and pecked at it, metaphorically speaking, until it broke through.

“This may…I am not sure it will be painless. But you will be you, again.” With a deep breath, eyes constantly glowing were hidden as he closed them. Arthur held his breath; waiting, hoping.

[montrealmadison]

in your palace warm, mighty king

okay i’ve recently found myself on angel tree tiktok. if you’re unfamiliar with the concept, basically, some stores will put out a tree around the holidays with gift tags for anonymous local kids, and people coming in to do their own shopping can take a tag off the tree and buy kids gifts off their wishlists for the store to pass off to them. (the linked video shows it in action!)

anyway this got me thinking about jack zimmermann at the beginning of his career. he has been fabulously wealthy and privileged for his whole life, but he’s only recently started earning a massive salary of his own and has no real idea of what to spend it on. he’s comfortable. he has a car and a nice apartment and an engagement ring hidden somewhere in said apartment. he knows he should probably donate to a worthwhile cause, but he hasn’t figured out what.

one day, though, bitty’s visiting for the weekend and comes to the store with him, and right there in the entryway, he just… stops. jack doesn’t notice and consequently almost runs him over with the cart.

“you alright? careful, eh?”

bitty does not respond, because he’s looking at the tree.

“bud?”

jack follows his gaze. it really doesn’t look like much. it’s fake, unlit, and has seen better days if the way it’s a little flattened on one side is anything to go by. there is an equally squashed-looking stuffed snowman sat on the floor next to it. it’s the kind of thing your eyes slide over easily, hurrying from one place to another. blink and you’ll miss it.

bitty isn’t blinking.

“lord, i haven’t seen one of these in years,” he says. his voice is soft. he still isn’t looking at jack. “do you know what it is?”

jack doesn’t, so bitty explains. and when they inch closer, jack sees that all the ornaments he thought were plain paper before are actually printed with ages, shoe sizes, requests for warm coats and toys and cute jeans and deodorant. here and there is a specific wish—a bluetooth speaker. a particular board game. one kid, age eight, is fervently hoping for a bike.

and—okay. here’s the thing. they’ve been together for more than a year, and bitty is pretty willing to go along with jack’s desire to spoil him. but although he’s so open and accepting when jack wants to kiss him, or cook dinner for a change, or lay him out on their bed and make him feel good—he will always, always get uncomfortable where significant amounts of money are involved. it was the subject of the one and only fight that sent them to bed still heated. the fundamental difference between their upbringings is the hardest for them to grasp: jack has never known a life without plenty. and bitty—

“i think my parents put me on one,” bitty says. “the year we moved back to madison, after—”

the closet looms between them, black and yawning.

“well. you know. coach had to leave a good job in lawrenceville. took us a while to get back on our feet, i think. and that year, they couldn’t—i mean, i heard them talking at night about how we might not be able to make christmas work, when they thought i couldn’t hear them. but i still wrote my letter to santa, and there were a couple presents when i woke up christmas morning, so.” he scuffs one shoe on the industrial carpet. “maybe an angel sent ‘em.”

the words make something sizzle down jack’s spine and settle low in his gut. he steps forward, reaches out, turns over the nearest tag.

boy, age 11. shoe size: 8. wishlist: sneakers, earbuds, basketball, patriots merch, chapter books. loves fantasy and mythology.

once upon a time, jack spent three months in a rehab center designed specifically for the privacy needs of celebrity clients. his parents footed the bill, had the windows on all their cars tinted for him to hide behind when he got out. at the same time, thousands of miles away, bitty sat at the top of the stairs in his parents’ house and listened to them wonder if they could afford to keep the magic of christmas alive another year.

people are stepping around them to get out of the cold, now, their eyes skipping right over the tree and the boys in front of it. once upon a time, strangers on the street picked apart jack’s overdose like a piece of tabloid gossip. strangers on the street made sure a thirteen-year-old kid had something to unwrap with his family on christmas morning.

“bits?”

bitty sniffles, swipes at one eye with the sleeve of his sweater. “yeah?”

jack lifts the tag gently off its branch, catches bitty’s gaze. bitty’s intake of breath is so sharp it’s audible over the music playing overhead. do you see what i see?

“what do you think? wanna go get us another cart?”

[angelwings-crossbowstrings]

Whumptober 2023

No. 26 Working to exhaustion

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader (platonic/early relationship)

Setting: Prison era

Warnings: Symptoms of sleep deprivation

“This has been the worst day!” You drove your knife into yet another softened skull, instinctively angling your head to keep the dark blood and rotten brain matter from splashing across your face. The walkers were overwhelming the prison fences again. It was taking more and more manpower to get it under control each time. 

Daryl scoffed from your left but said nothing, simply stabbing any corpse within reach. Carol was on your right, nodding with a quick “sure is” in between pushing back against the failing steel and thrusting her own knife forward to keep blood-and-death-stained teeth away from her hands. 

It took hours to get the situation under control, nearly dusk before the fence workers hauled themselves inside with collective groans and shuffling feet. Dinner had come and gone but everyone was too tired for food at this point anyway. 

“Who’s on watch tonight?” Rick queried while rotating his sore shoulder. Daryl didn’t respond verbally, just raised a loose fist in the air while trudging up the stairs to his perch. You came up beside the former sheriff, both of you watching the archer disappear at the top. “You’ll be with him?”

“You know it.” You answered with a nod. Rick patted your shoulder and you parted ways. When you reached the top of the steps, you had hoped to find Daryl resting on the mattress. No such luck. Well, he was on the mattress but sitting propped against the wall, checking over his crossbow. He was undoubtedly getting ready to head up to the tower early. 

Daryl hadn’t slept in at least three days. You weren’t sure what was keeping him awake, but you’d hear him at night, moving around the prison like a restless spirit. Only you knew what to listen for when it came to the archer. 

The way he tapped the railing rhythmically on his way to the upper level and back down again. His blunt nails made little noise but it was enough. 

His steps were damn near silent save for the small scuff of his boot when he seemed to favor his left leg in the slightest way. Maybe an old injury. Maybe just the way he walked. You never asked and figured if he wanted you to know, he’d tell you. 

You knew he had been pacing the prison over and over, keeping watch without anyone knowing. He always seemed to be in his perch when people began to shuffle out of their cells in the morning, none the wiser. 

Except you. 

He looked almost ready to keel over, at least to your eyes. Rick and Carol were worried too. The archer had stumbled at the fence today. Just…off balance, giving a walker the chance to grab his wrist. You had sliced through the decomposing flesh so quickly and closely that you were afraid you had actually cut him. But if it had scratched him…

“Hey, you.” You plopped down on his mattress hard enough to jostle him on the other side. You earned an irritated scoff but he kept to what he was doing. He really did look poorly. The circles around his eyes were so pronounced, how could anyone not notice them? Maybe they did and just didn’t find him approachable or feared what he would do if they snitched to Rick. He wasn’t the friendliest of chaps to those outside of his inner circle. Hell, sometimes he was even less friendly to those closest to him. 

“Ya need somethin’?” He regarded you with a sidelong glare and a raised brow. He was usually never so coarse with you. 

Sleep deprivation. You told yourself. “Just the pleasure of your ever-inviting, always hospitable company.” You smiled as he scowled. He really was a sourpuss tonight. Biting your lip, you watched him get his things together and quickly shuffled over on your knees to stop him when he made to stand. “So I was thinking,”

“Don’ hur’ yerself.”

“Ha Ha. Dixon’s got jokes.” You deadpanned. When he rotated his hand in the air to signal for you to continue, you wrinkled your nose at him and stuck out your tongue. “Anyway, I was thinking I’d take first watch tonight. You could come hang out up there with me, catch some z’s.” He already appeared prepared to balk at the idea. You sighed and sank back to sit on your heels. “You look tired, Daryl.”

“M’fine.” He muttered, a little too quickly. 

“You’ve been on three runs in two days. You clear the fence. You hunt. You dug most of the graves for the ones who died of the flu. You fix shit when it’s not working. You take double watch shifts. You…wander around when you should be sleeping.” 

His expression morphed right in front of your eyes: indifferent to angry in 0.025 seconds. “Ya keepin’ tabs on me?”

“No!” You shook your head adamantly. This was not going well. “I just…notice things.”

“Righ’.” He sneered. The archer grabbed his things and stood. “Good talk.” He snapped. You were up and laying a hand on his arm before he could take the first step toward the stairs. 

“Daryl, we’re just—”

“We?”

Shit. “Yeah, we. Your friends, Daryl. We’re worried about you. Ever since—”

“Don’ go there, Y/N.” You watched his hackles rise: muscles tensing, shoulders leveling just below his ears. You had hit a nerve. 

“So, this is about Merle.”

“Don’ say his name like ya gave a fuck ‘bout ‘im!” 

He spun on you so quickly that you actually thought— even if only for a split second— that he was going to hit you. You reeled, the back of your foot hitting his mattress. Off balance, you fell onto it and stared up at his looming figure with wide eyes. 

“Daryl.”

“I don’ need a babysitter!” He hissed. He swayed a little and blinked hard before turning away with a grunt. You watched him go, still shaken by his behavior. Daryl hadn’t acted that way toward you since the early days on the Greene farm. There was very little time you spent apart, aside from runs you weren’t designated to go on. 

Since Merle died, the bowman had become distant, withdrawing from everyone. You tried to keep him grounded, but it only seemed to irritate him more. 

Regardless, your worry outweighed the hurt. 

You pushed yourself up and ran down the steps, sorting through things you could say or do to convince him that he needed to rest; that he didn’t need to do this alone. Aside from using the stock of his crossbow to knock him out so you could drag him to bed, you weren’t coming up with much. 

No matter what, you weren’t leaving him in that tower alone tonight. 

It was well past sundown, darkness covering the prison. You hadn’t brought a flashlight. Actually, you hadn’t brought anything. It shouldn’t have surprised you when you didn’t see Daryl until you almost tripped over him. He was just sitting on the ground near the tower, his knees up, arms laying across them. His head was down. A fresh wave of worry nearly knocked you over. 

“Daryl?” You approached him slowly, almost like a wounded animal. When he looked up, you couldn’t make out much. 

“M’fine.” His voice had lost all the heat it had fired at you only moments before. 

“Okay.” You didn’t push, fearing it would only make him withdraw further. You sat down a few feet away. “Forgot my flashlight.” He only hummed but you could see as he lowered his head again. 

The two of you sat in silence for a while, long enough for Glenn to come down from the tower. As he approached, he raised his flashlight. You couldn’t see his face but knew he had to be wondering why Daryl hadn’t already shown up early as he normally did. Your eyes flickered to the archer, his head still bowed, seemingly oblivious to his surroundings. He wasn’t asleep. The slow flexing of his fingers told you that much. His usually keen senses were dulled from exhaustion. 

Your gaze shifted back, your head shaking slowly. You jerked your chin toward the prison, hoping Glenn got the message. He must have picked up on something because he nodded at you as he passed by, waiting until he was sure you could see him. A concerned look was thrown toward Daryl as the flashlight was passed off to you but then he pressed on toward the metal door. 

It wasn’t until that door closed with a dull thud that Daryl flinched, raising his head and looking around somewhat wildly. You were quick to reach out but drew back your hand just before your fingertips could stroke across his bicep. 

“Hey.” You whispered, directing the beam upward so as not to startle him further. He slowly turned his head toward your voice, his muted ocean eyes blinking slowly. Weariness was settling on him heavily. The way his eyes would close for a few seconds and then quickly nictate was a sure sign of microsleep. Daryl was dangerously close to collapse. You needed to get him inside. “Daryl?”

His eyebrows raised at the sound of his name but his gaze remained unfocused. You chewed on your lip, weighing your options. 

“Daryl, let’s go inside, okay?”

The archer tilted his head, moving a little quicker. “Got watch.” He rasped. It almost sounded like a question. 

“No, Maggie’s gonna take it.”

“Nah, s’my watch.” Daryl climbed to his feet in slow, tremulous movements, swaying backward like his crossbow was weighing him down. He staggered toward the wall, slapping his palm against it to keep his balance as he inched toward the tower. 

“Daryl, you’re exhausted. Your body’s going to shut down if you don’t rest!” You followed at his side, hands hovering as if you could hold him up when he inevitably fell. 

“M’fine, Y/N. Gotta be.”

“But why? Why do you have to be fine?”

“Stop.”

“Are you trying to die?” Your voices were crawling higher while Daryl’s steps were growing slower. 

“Leave it, Y/N.” The archer stumbled to a halt, wiping at his eyes and blinking furiously to clear his blurred vision. 

“What if you fall from the tower? Down the stairs? What if you pass out on the run tomorrow when there’s no one to keep the walkers off you? What if—”

“We was gonna rob the camp.” 

Your back went straight, head shaking in perplexity. “What?”

“Merle n’ me. We was gonna rob ya’ll n’ take off. Leave ya with nothin’. Leave ya— the kids—” He couldn’t meet your eyes, his own betraying him with hot tears that he was fighting like hell to hold back. 

Your expression softened, everything suddenly making sense. Nothing from the quarry mattered now. You were all together. He had stayed when he never meant to. “Daryl, you—”

“Never told Rick or…or Carol. Never told you. I gotta make it righ’, Y/N. Fer me n’ fer…fer Merle..” The look he gave you was desperate, pleading. You realized instantly that this was a glimpse into Daryl’s soul, laid bare in a moment of weakness he’d hate himself for later. 

With tears in your eyes, you did the only thing that felt right in that moment. You closed the space between you and hugged him, slipping your hands beneath the crossbow to hold him tight. “You’ve made it right, Daryl. A thousand times over, you’ve made it right.” 

The archer crumbled, the only things holding him upright were the wall at his back and you pressed against him. 

“Merle was… he didn’…” 

He slipped into silence after that, never bringing his arms up to hold onto you. You knew it was because he just didn’t have the energy. 

“It’s okay.” You soothed, just listening to him breathe while you figured out what to do next. The door to the prison closed, the sound audible to you from around the corner. Maggie would appear any second, likely with Glenn in tow. “Daryl.” He didn’t respond. Had he passed out? “Daryl, can you walk with me?”

Relief washed over you when you felt some of his weight shift, followed by a resigned “yeah.” When you maneuvered away from him, you slid yourself underneath his arm, continuing to offer support. Just as you took the first step, the beam of Maggie’s flashlight danced from around the corner. You could only pray she would recognize the delicate situation and act accordingly. 

When two silhouettes came into view, you held your breath. They were headed straight for you. Daryl was weak and pliant at the moment but should he realize someone other than you could see any vulnerability, it was unlikely he would remain that way. 

You saw the very moment that Maggie— thankfully — grabbed hold of Glenn’s arm and steered him away in order to give you and Daryl a wide berth. You finally breathed again once you had rounded the corner and the archer remained quiet at your side. 

He was clumsy on the steps leading to the door and again on the stairs to his perch, but you managed to keep both of you from face-planting. It was necessary to keep him standing for a while longer. If you allowed him to sit on the mattress, he could just fall over and you’d never be able to get his crossbow off his back. 

“You with me?” You asked softly, ducking from under his arm to stand in front of him. He was doing well keeping himself on his feet even if he was swaying. When you cupped your hand over his chin and tapped your thumb against his cheek, his eyes focused and found yours. “I need to get this, okay?”

Hazy blue orbs followed you while you lifted the strap over his head, forced to stand on your tip-toes. It was a graceless but successful effort. Once the weapon and his bag were on the floor, you indicated for him to sit. He complied but not without a weak scowl. 

“Don’ need ya ta baby me. I got it.” He said, with little to no bite. 

“I’m not babying you, Daryl.” You crouched in front of him and brushed at his hair. It had grown just enough to be in his face. It was soft against your fingertips, if not a little greasy. You absently wondered how long he would let it get. With a smile, your attention returned to the task at hand. “I’m caring for you. There’s a difference.”

Your eyes locked, neither of you daring to look away. A moment that should have felt uncomfortable bordered on a version of intimate. Daryl looked away first, a light flush coloring his cheeks. Your tongue slid across your bottom lip, finding it suddenly dry. 

“Let’s take off your boots.” You reached for the laces but he slid his foot out of your reach. 

“Why?”

“Because you’re about to crash and burn for quite a while and you can at least do it comfortably.” It was reasonable, but so was his excuse not to. 

“Need ta be ready. Anythin’ can happen.”

You mulled it over and nodded. “You’re right. How about this?” The archer was swaying where he sat now, fading fast with the temptation of a mattress and pillow just behind him. “You take off your boots and I’ll leave mine on.” The perplexed expression on his bone-weary face was almost comical. 

“The hell you havin’ yer boots on gonna do ta help me all the way up here?”

“Because I’m not going anywhere.” You stated firmly, intense gaze daring him to argue with you. You expected he would and prepared yourself for it. 

But he was just too damn tired. 

“Alrigh’.” 

You smiled at the top of his head while clumsy fingers worked at the laces, taking longer than necessary but still ending with his boots sitting against the wall. 

“Great.” You weren’t about to tell him how to go to bed. The less he had to argue about, the better. You watched him crawl toward the pillow and all but collapse once he reached it, facedown with a smothered groan. 

His blanket was like all the others, thin and itchy, but you could probably cover him with garbage bags at this point and he wouldn’t care. You pulled the material up to his shoulders and then climbed over him to sit on the other side with your back against the wall. 

After a moment, he turned his head toward you. “Ya really gonna sit there the whole time?”

“Every minute.” You chuckled when he pulled a face. “I promise not to be a creep and stare at you.” His features relaxed. He even offered a shadow of a smile, eyelids appearing to grow too heavy to keep open. 

“Ya… really don’… hafta stay.” He muttered between breaths, sound asleep just as the last word left his lips. 

“I know. I want to.” I’ll always stay. For you. 

[ghcstao3]

(part 1 part 2)

-

It takes Simon well over a week to first make use of John's phone number.

And not even because he's too busy—he’s just nervous. Like a goddamned teenager fawning over a crush and being overly conscious of everything he does; Simon is surprised his thumbs don't fall off the amount of times he types and deletes messages he thinks to send.

Eventually, though, he’s offered no choice when he holds out his phone to his brother to ask if his simple Hey, it’s Simon :) is a good starting message, and Tommy just reaches out and presses send before Simon can stop him.

Simon scowls at Tommy. “Bastard,” he musters through gritted teeth. He looks look back down to his phone and feels his heart stop as the delivered indictor pops up.

“No more than you,” Tommy replies impassively. He already has his back turned, more concerned with anything other than Simon and his issues. He waves a dismissive hand. “I’m getting sick of your whinging.”

“I never—“

Simon’s phone buzzes in his hand, and the rest is history.

Weeks later and Simon finds himself regularly anticipating messages from John, between gigs and practices and everything else. It’s how he starts, continues, and ends his days—and it’s honestly concerning how much Simon misses this almost-stranger after such little time.

Though, he supposes, John is much less a stranger these days with the sheer amount they text—not that Simon would ever like to admit to that number.

Unfortunately not much can come from it, however. Simon gets further away every time they travel and he never knows when they’d be close again, if ever. And once weeks turn to months, Simon is certain he wouldn’t be seeing John again.

Or so he thinks. Because apparently John is full of surprises.

Because of course he is—though maybe Simon should have been a bit more observant of his brother and Beth’s odd behaviours as of late, instead of being so wrapped up in John.

Then, he might’ve seen this coming. Though, that being said, he wouldn’t complain either way.

It’s the day after another show, and Simon is still squirrelled away in his hotel room despite the late morning hour. His muscles still ache satisfyingly from the evening prior, and he expects to spend the rest of his day doing little else other than relaxing and messaging with John.

As is the new typical.

But John, uncharacteristically, hasn’t responded since directly before the band’s performance. Simon frowns when he rolls over to see an empty screen when there’s a knock on his door.

Simon pauses. He knows Tommy has the spare key, and that his brother would waste no time barging in—and neither would Beth, for that matter. He hadn’t called for room service, nor did anyone mention housecleaning, so his existing frown only deepens as he slowly gets up to check.

His hesitance dissipates entirely when he glances through the peephole and sees John on the other side. Simon swings the door open with haste.

Simon’s brows knit together even as John’s grinning.

“How did—why are you here, Johnny?”

The nickname is entirely accidental.

Neither of them seem to particularly hate it.

John’s grin only falters as he scuffs the cheap hotel carpet with his shoe. “Your, ah—your brother, he, um—“

“‘Course he did,” Simon sighs. Without thinking he seizes John’s wrist and pulls him inside the room. He peers out the door and down the hall before shutting them both inside from potential prying eyes and ears.

See: his brother and sister-in-law.

John shifts his weight, pointedly avoiding looking at Simon. “If you don’t want me here…”

“I do,” Simon blurts. “I’m just… surprised, is all.”

John blinks. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Simon breathes.

They stare at each other for eons, like they’re both trying to come to terms with being present together. Again.

Only for the third time. Yet Simon already feels all out of sorts in the best way possible.

“So.” John puffs out his cheeks, turning on his heel to better take in the room. “What’s there to do around here?”

“You’re asking the wrong person.” Simon feels the twitch of a wry smile tug at his lips. John is facing him again, looking every bit as teasing. “Why don’t we find out together?”

[iluvchick3nz]

Hey hey hey, just wanted to tell you that everything you’ve written has been an absolute JOY to read. I was thinking about logan and how he’s from rimouski which is a kinda small town I think?for a prompt maybe logan is showing finn and leo around his hometown, where he grew up skating, and where he used to get into trouble and his highschool :)

Yikes, this one is LONG!! Apologies.

I LOVE showing people around my hometown, even though I don't get back much anymore. I feel lucky that I am always happy to go home, even if I could NEVER imagine living there permanently again, which is kind of how I think Logan feels.

I also did some research on Rimouski, just to get a feel for it. It's not a BIG city, but it's a port town, so it's fairly large. However, I have learned that a 'small town' means different things to different people, depending on where you're from. I'm from a 'small town'of 13,000 people, but there's a town next to me with 4,000. From what I understand, Rimouski has about 50,000 people. So for me, it's HUGE! But if you're from NYC or something, that's fairly small!

Enjoy some fluffity fluffy fluff!! All credits to @lumosinlove !!

TW: Mentions of nefarious activities, but no participation in said activities.

P.S. Thank you for the kind words, friend!! <3

“Finn!”

Logan watched as Finn laughed and was swept up into a hug by his sisters Sydney and Aubrey, all chatting excitedly as Logan and Leo stepped out of their rental car behind them. The flight from New Orleans was still in his muscles, and Logan stretched his arms over his head to relieve some of the tension. A hand came to rest on his lower back, and he squinted at Leo beside him, who was smiling softly.

“Salut, soleil,” Logan said gently. He reached up to twist the gray curls on the front of Leo’s forehead. “Ça va?”

Leo nodded, but his eyes were tense. “Yeah, just tired.” He flushed and looked over to where Finn had an arm around each of the girls and was still laughing. “A little nervous.”

“Regarde-moi,” Logan whispered, and lowered his hand to cup Leo's cheek. “They all love you, d'accord?” He leaned up to kiss Leo softly. “And most importantly, I love you.”

Leo nodded and took a deep breath. “Okay.” He kissed Logan quickly. When he spoke again, it was in French, which warmed Logan from the inside. “Okay, I love you, too.” He grinned. “Now let's get our bags before we get dragged away by your sisters.”

As if summoned, Sydney and Aubrey appeared behind Logan to dog pile him, and he rolled his eyes fondly as he turned to hug them. Noelle came put a bit more calmly, and Logan watched as she hugged Leo tightly. They were more familiar with each other, and Logan was grateful that she was providing him a warming presence. Still, the tension lingered in Leo's shoulders. Logan vowed to massage it out later.

“You ready to give those boys of yours a Canadian welcome?” Aubrey asked. It was reassuring, hearing his own accent after the whirlwind of adjusting to the French that Leo and his parents had spoken at home.

Sydney hummed in agreement. “Especially your Leo.” She patted Logan's shoulder. “At least he speaks more French than the redhead over here.”

“Hey,” Finn said. He’d crossed his arms and was pouting. Logan couldn't help but smile at him, gone on the way he looked standing on the steps and framed by his family home after so long. “I might not speak French fluently, but I can tell when you're talking about me.”

Sydney laughed and went over to scuff his head. 

***

This was all he needed, Logan thought. They were in their rental car, Leo beside him in the passenger's seat, Finn in the middle row behind them. The wind was blowing their hair back from the open windows and they were laughing as Finn sang along horribly with the radio. The car had always been his safe space to be a little silly, a little dorky. He was earnest and fun all the time, but only Logan and Leo got to see him truly let himself go and indulge all those beautiful thoughts that were constantly running through his brain. Logan smiled at him in the rearview mirror and readjusted his hand on the steering wheel to reach over and place the other on Leo's thigh. Leo laced his fingers over the back of Logan's own.

“Allez,” Logan said, nodding out the window. “That's my old high school.” 

He slowed down and pulled over so they both could see. He had taken Finn here years ago and they'd snuck around to the football field and laid out in the sun. The school itself was nothing remarkable, but Leo lit up ten different colors when he looked at it for the first time. 

“Hey, sunshine,” Finn said, leaning over to rest his chin on Leo's shoulder over the back of the seat. He was smirking. “Ask Lo about what he got up to behind the bleachers.”

Leo laughed and looked at Logan in amusement. “Oh? What happened behind the bleachers?”

Logan bit his lip and rolled his eyes at Finn playfully. “Nothing awful. Just… the usual. Weed, booze-”

“Bad blow jobs.”

Leo barked out a laugh and Logan flushed. “Finn.”

“What? It's funny!”

Leo was still laughing when he squeezed Logan's fingers. His blue eyes were mischievous. “What'd you do? Get caught or something?”

“Non,” Logan said. His cheeks were burning. “I didn't even ask her! She offered to me because she had never- and I hadn't-” He huffed. “She just- her teeth.”

That made Leo laugh even harder, leaning back in his seat. Finn had his cheek on the headrest, smiling at Logan brightly. “Poor girl.”

“Was she okay?” Leo asked.

Logan nodded sheepishly. “Ouais, she was fine. It actually wasn't the last time we- well.”

Finn's eyes widened and he sat up. “Wait. Was she your- your first time, too?”

“She was nice. And she didn't care about the whole-” Logan waved his hand up and down. “-hockey thing. Lots of girls did, but she didn’t. She was first in our class and she was kind. We had history together, we got along.” He shrugged. “So we- you know. A few times. It was good, I guess.”

He smiled widely at Finn's narrowed eyes and leaned over to kiss him lightly. “Not as good as with you, don't worry, rouge.” He turned to nudge at Leo's cheek with his nose. “And your blow jobs are way better, soleil.”

Leo snorted. “I should hope so,” he said drily, but he accepted Logan's sweet kiss. “You make me practice a lot.”

Logan laughed and put the car into gear to pull away. 

***

“Oh my God!” Leo gasped. He pulled his sweatshirt sleeves over his fingers. “This rink is way nicer than mine back home.”

Finn nudged him. “You're in Canadia, nutter butter. This is considered a shit-hole here.”

Logan tisked. “Non, rouge is telling lies.” He held the door to the stands open for them. “This is a nice rink. Lots of summer camps, and we've got gear for kids that can't afford it.”

Leo smiled softly as he took the ice in for the first time. “That's nice. I like that.” Without anybody there with them, he grabbed at Logan's hand to pull their bodies together. “Did you ever go to summer camp here?”

Logan reached up to play with the ends of his curls. “I coached them, mon coeur. The middle schoolers. The little kids.” 

Leo's eyebrows raised. “Oh yeah?”

“Ouais,” Logan whispered. He took a quick look around before leaning up and kissing him. “I like little kids.”

“Don't say that here,” Finn scolded. He looked conflicted and his ears were red. “That’s grounds for public indecency in the bleachers.”

Leo and Logan laughed at him. Suddenly, a thought occurred to Logan, and he turned to Leo again with a smile. 

“You know, soleil,” he said, leaning in. “I would’ve coached you at summer camp. In high school.”

Leo groaned and rolled his eyes. “You think you’re so funny.”

Logan just kissed his cheek. “Je t’aime.” He turned to Finn, who was watching them gently. “Ça va?”

Finn nodded. “Mm hm.” He brushed Logan’s hair out of his face. “I like you both with little kids.”

Leo snorted. “Nope, I still practically am one, according to this one,” he said, nudging Logan with his shoulder. “We are taking a rain check on this conversation.”

That didn't seem to deter Finn, who reached to play with Leo’s fingers, eyes bright. “So the conversation is happening.”

“Not yet, Fish, my Lord.”

“Not yet? Oh man.”

“Okay,” Logan interrupted with a laugh. “Allez, allez, let’s go. Home for dinner and maman is making cassoulet.”

***

Leo's laugh rang out across their backyard as he worked in the garden with Iva. They were- planting? Weeding? Picking? Logan didn't know what they were doing exactly, but he knew that he couldn't take his eyes off of Leo and the way he spoke French with his maman. His parents both loved Leo, but Iva had really taken to him because he was gentle and ready and willing to kneel in the garden with her. Logan's parents had started that garden when he'd gone off to college, and since then it had grown to an immense size. Most of their vegetables in the spring, summer, and fall came from that garden, and they spent Logan didn't know how much time and effort maintaining and caring for it. Leo's eyes had immediately got excited when he saw it, which Logan filed away in that folder in his brain for future reference. Leo deserved his own garden someday, Logan decided.

Behind him, through the screen door, his father’s soft, accented English mixed with Finn’s loud American, barking tone. They were mixing drinks, Logan assumed. Marius had invested in a bar cart the year previous, and Finn had been anxious and curious to see it. Logan could hear bottles clinking and their chatter. He felt at peace with their voices surrounding him, mixing with the cadence of the French that Leo and his maman were speaking.

“You know, Lolo,” Sydney said in French from beside him, peeking out over her sunglasses from where she was sat in an Adirondack chair. “I don’t think maman is going to let that Leo of yours go now that she’s got him in that garden. 

Logan laughed. “Non, I don't thinks so either.” He sighed and settled against his own seat back. “I want to get him a garden some day.”

Noelle snorted. “You can’t just get people gardens, Lobear. You can buy land-”

“D’accord, you know what I meant.”

“Do you want to buy Leo land?” Aubrey asked suddenly. 

Logan turned to stare at her. “Quoi?”

“I'm just saying…” She bit her cheek. Aubrey was quiet most of the time, and often struggled to find words. Logan related to her the most, in that respect. “I guess I'm asking if you see that. With him- and Finn.” She gestured with her hand. “The house, the garden, the future.”

“Oh,” Logan said, taken aback. 

He had kind of thought that was a given, if he was honest. Leo and Finn were it for him, he knew it. They knew it, too, he supposed. They just seemed to talk about the future already assuming that they were forever. He'd never talked about it directly- not with them, not with anyone.

Aubrey's eyes were still watching him knowingly, but she was smiling. “Leo's so gentle and kind. He's so good to you, you know? Finn, too, he always has been.” She squeezed his arm. “They deserve you. Don't forget that you deserve them, too. We all want that for you.”

Logan took an inhale, lost for words. All three of his sisters, who knew him better than almost anyone, who wanted nothing but the best for him, were watching him carefully. He turned to face them. 

“Merci,” he whispered. He felt his cheeks warm. “Thank you for saying that. I-” He huffed, a little frustrated, and they all looked at him amusedly. “Allez, you know.” He sighed. “I really missed you.”

Noelle laughed. “Look at our little Lolo. All grown up with his big feelings.”

He narrowed his eyes at his sisters as they all laughed. Sydney ruffled his hair. “We missed you, too.”

Logan turned back to watch Leo and Iva, who had moved onto some green looking vegetables. They were checking under the leaves- for worms, Logan supposed. He loved the way Leo's French mixed with his mother's. At first, when he heard Leo speak it for the first time, he hadn't been so sure. But now, he loved it as much as his own Quebecois accent. French meant his old home, where he was from. But mixed with Leo's voice, slightly Cajun from his parent's influence, it was home, too. Leo's French was his two worlds colliding and mixing and existing in the same plane- a new home with Leo and Finn. His forever home. Logan sighed and rested his chin on his hand to take in Leo's tan skin and blond curls. 

Suddenly, a glass appeared in front of him and a hand rested on his upper back. Finn's voice was quiet in his ear. “Hi, baby. Brought you something.”

Logan tilted his head back and looked up at Finn, who looked so gorgeous with his hair pushed back slightly, more wavy from the summer humidity. He was smiling and kissed Logan’s forehead before shaking the glass. “Long Island iced tea. With peach iced tea to make it sweeter for you, sweet thing.”

Logan smiled and rested his temple against Finn’s hip. He took the glass from him. “Merci, rouge.” He took a sip. “Mm, it’s good.”

“Hey, freckle!” Noelle called from the end of the deck. She was looking at him over her sunglasses expectantly. “Where’s our iced beverages?”

Finn rolled his eyes but was grinning. “Your dad’s almost done. I had to make a special delivery.”

Noelle snorted and turned back to her book. Aubrey caught Logan’s eye with raised brows as if to say, See? Logan nodded at her and leaned into Finn’s touch.

Finn sighed from above him. “He looks so happy, doesn’t he? Le.”

Logan smiled at the way Leo took the basket of vegetables from his mother, waving her off with one hand as he walked over to the hose to wash them. She stood with her hands on her hips, caught them watching, and winked. 

Logan held a hand up for Finn to take and played with his fingers. “Ouais. I was thinking…”

“You? Yikes, you feeling okay?”

Logan bonked his head against Finn’s stomach. “Fish, this is important.”

A kiss was dropped to his head. “I’m listening.” He bent to whisper in Logan’s ear. “God, I love your voice.”

Logan nudged his shoulder against Finn’s jaw gently and laughed, before settling down again. “I was thinking…” He let go of Finn’s hand to cup his jaw and look into his eyes. His beautiful brown eyes. “I was thinking that I want to get Leo space for a garden. Someday.”

Finn's smile was blinding. “Yeah?”

Logan nodded and traced his cheek. “Ouais. And maybe a bar cart. For you. And bookshelves with a library ladder. And a nice big kitchen for Leo. And a reading nook for the both of you.”

“And what'll you have?”

Logan flitted his eyes across Finn's face, then to Leo, who was washing carrots. He gripped Finn's hair and touched their temples. “I'll have you and Le.” He sighed shakily. “That's all I want.” He laughed. “Plus, I'll probably just follow you both around the house to wherever you are, anyways.”

Finn laughed into a brief kiss. “You lost puppy.” He regarded Logan carefully, still smiling. “I love you.”

“Je t'aime,” Logan sighed happily. “I love you so much.”

“Hey,” Leo's voice said softly. Instantly, they turned to look at him. He was smiling broadly and standing in front of them. He patted the basket in his arms. “Got some fresh veggies. Y'all want a platter with some dip? I could whip some up.”

“Yes, please,” Sydney said. “And some iced cold beverages, too, please O'Hara.”

“On it.”

Finn and Leo each passed a hand through Logan's hair before going inside. He sighed and tilted his face up towards the sun.

***

Later, Logan was watching Finn and Leo get ready for bed with a warm feeling in his chest. Leo's chest was still damp from his shower, and Logan’s eyes followed a water droplet down his happy trail and to the hem of his boxers. Finn must have noticed, too, because he brushed his thumb over the wet mark and licked some of the water on Leo's collarbone. Leo laughed and nudged Finn slightly, but Finn just leaned up and kissed his cheek. Logan suddenly felt a desperate wanting to have them beside him. 

“Ici,” he said.

Finn's eyes on his were playful. “What? You getting jealous?” He walked over and flopped down on Logan. “I'll lick you, too, if you want. Watch.”

Logan laughed. “Non, non, rouge-”

But it was too late. Finn had bent his head to lick up Logan's stomach, running his tongue across his own happy trail before settling his chin against Logan's chest. “Don't lie, baby, you like being licked.”

Logan just traced the purple under his eyes with his thumbs. He looked up to Leo, who was putting his dirty garden clothes in the laundry hamper. “Soleil, ici.”

“I'm coming, sweetheart.” He dug around in his suitcase for a second before holding up a book. “Just getting my book out for bed, honey.”

Logan sighed and leaned against Leo's side as he sat down. “I have to tell you something.”

“Okay,” Finn said. He ran a hand up and down Logan's ribs. “Are you okay, baby?”

Logan nodded. He pushed Finn's hair back and settled underneath the arm Leo rested across his shoulders. “I just- I have something to tell you.”

Leo kissed his temple. “What is it, sweetheart?”

Logan took a deep breath. He pressed his cheek to Leo's shoulder, cool from the shower water, and cupped Finn's freckled face in his hands. “You do know that you're forever for me, oui?”

Finn's eyes closed and Leo's breath hitched against his shoulder. They were waiting for him to continue, and he didn't want to keep it in any longer.

“I need you to know that,” he said. He bent to kiss Finn's forehead, then tilted his head up to press his lips to Leo's jaw. Leo's eyes were blue and wide like jewels. “You're it for me. You're forever. There's- there's nothing after you, d'accord? Nothing. I love you too much for there to be room for anything else.”

Leo breathed shakily into his hair. “Oh.”

Logan nudged his cheek with his nose. “Soleil, do you understand? You're it, mon coeur.” When Leo nodded, biting his lip, Logan turned to Finn, who still had his eyes closed and his mouth resting beside Logan's nipple. “Rouge. Rouge do you understand?”

When Finn's eyes opened, they were warm and watery. “I've wanted to have you forever since the day I met you.” Logan's breath hitched as Finn adjusted himself to straddle his thighs. He cupped Logan's jaw firmly, a tear catching on his eyelashes before falling down his cheek. “You've been my forever since you walked into that stupid frat house with that backwards hat. I have loved you every second I've known you, baby. Every single second. And you.” He turned to Leo and smiled in that way him and Logan both did when they caught sight of those baby blues. “You were the most unexpected, beautiful gift the NHL ever gave me. I love to play hockey, sunshine, but I was made to love you. To love both of you.” His tears were falling a bit more freely now, and he brushed the ones that were falling from Leo’s eyes away with his thumbs. “Don’t you ever doubt that, Le, baby. We were made to love you.”

“Ouais, mon coeur,” Logan whispered. He tucked his face into Leo's neck and breathed his scent in deeply. “We love you so much.”

Leo nodded, but he was still sniffling. He tried to speak, but his breath only hitched with a light sob. When his shoulders started shaking, Finn moved away from Logan to settle on top of his lap and hold him. “Oh, Le, baby, it's okay. It's okay, sweetheart.” He kissed the side of Leo's head. “We love you so much.”

“I'm so sorry,” Leo got out. He leaned back to look at Finn and drew Logan close to him. “I'm sorry, it's just- I mean- I just don't know what to do without you. I'm barely an adult, and I don't know what I’d do without you, and I- it's just a lot. I just love you so- so much.”

Surprisingly, that made Finn laugh. “You're so pretty when you cry, you know that?”

Leo just groaned and pinched Finn's hip. “I just mean… I'm still nineteen. Most people don't find their forever at nineteen, or know what that forever feels like. And just- I'm younger but it doesn't feel that way? We're in love, and we live together, and I'm nineteen, and I-” He took a pained breath. “You two- you're too permanent for this to go sideways and have me come out on the other side okay.”

Logan sucked in a breath. “But that's not going to happen, d'accord?” He twisted to kneel up beside them both, taking Leo's face in his hands and looking down at him. “You’re forever, mon soleil. This is it.” He kissed his wet cheeks. “You found us, mon chou. You, okay? Finn and I felt okay to love each other because of you, because we also get to love you.”

“Lo's right,” Finn said. He took Leo's hand and kissed it. “There's no us without you. We are not anything if you're not here, too, okay, baby? I am meant to love you both or nothing at all, there's no in between.”

“Ouais,” Logan whispered. “I love you both, or nothing at all.”

Leo nodded and looked at them each carefully, lovingly. “I love you more than anything. Anything at all.” He shrugged and smiled softly. “Besides, finding you at nineteen means lots and lots of years together.”

Logan smiled widely. “Ouais. Ouais, you're right, it does.” He kissed Leo, then Finn, then flopped down onto Leo's chest with a grunt. “That was so much English.”

Finn and Leo both laughed loudly and Finn crawled over to rest on Leo's other side. “I don't think you've talked that much ever.”

Logan threw and arm across to tug at Finn's hair. “I needed you to know.”

“Mm,” Finn hummed into Leo's neck. He reached for the book Leo discarded. “Want me to read to you? Let’s see how many books we get through in forever.”

Leo leaned down to kiss him. “Yes, please.” He scooted further down the pillows and closed his eyes. “Your voice puts me to sleep. Like a lullaby.”

Finn grinned at Logan and winked before turning to gaze at Leo's relaxed face. “Oh yeah? Well, get ready, baby, because this lullaby is forever.”

Leo sighed contentedly and wiggled closer to both of them. Logan closed his eyes, too, tucked against Leo's chest. Finn's voice reverberated around his childhood bedroom, the place where Logan dreamed of having him forever, the place that he got to bring Leo to for the first time knowing he was forever. That they both were. The sheets were warm around his torso, Leo's chest heating up as he drifted off. Logan sighed and sank against Leo's skin, against the hand Finn had resting on his hip. He couldn't wait to wake up. There'd be a Cup parade, his family with him, the hot summer sun and the French conversation surrounding him on the main street. But for now, Logan was sleepy and sated, the most important things in his life were in his bed, and he was safe and sound and so, so in love. Logan took a deep breath and basked in his forever.  

[17ghostsinatrenchcoat]

Here’s a story I made, it’s quite long, hope ya like it

Title : the one that got away

“So what are you doing for dinner?” I asked my friend as we walked down the street. “I don’t know, mac and cheese maybe?” We proceeded to walk down the street, the shops soon ended and the neighborhood began. As we walked further Jack's house came into view “see you later” he blurted as he jogged back to his house, my hand slowly raised and slightly waved “bye” I said quietly. As I walk a little longer to my house the sun starts to go down and the yellowish lamp posts flicker on, one by one illuminating the streets, when I get to my house the sun has already gone down, I pull out my copper and silver keys attached to a silver ring, they make clunking sounds as I lift them to the door. I hear the door unlock as the keys rotate, I twist the handle and pull the door toward me, my dirt embedded shoes stepped through the door frame, I kicked off my shoes, one landed upside down, and the other hit the wall leaving a light brown scuff.

I walk to my room, it has a large bed, a dark blue blanket and pillow, fake vines draped across the ceiling twined with string lights, and at the corner of my bed there is a small mountain of stuffed animals. I walk to the edge of my bed and face plant into the pile of toys, I roll off them and into the open part of my bed, I pull out my phone and go to texts “whatcha doin” I text to Jack, a small buffering symbol popped up on his side “eating mac and cheese” he texted, “what are you doing” he asked back “nothin much, just laying in bed” I replied. “Noice” he replied, I chuckled “wanna hang out tomorrow” I asked “sure” he replied, I put my phone on my light stand and went to bed.

In the morning I slid on my dirt embedded shoes under the scuff on the wall “I’ll clean that up later” I said as I slid on my sweatshirt, I pulled out my keys and I fumbled them but caught them before they fell, I exited my house and locked the door. I was in an upbeat mood as I went to Jack’s house, once I got there I knocked on the door, there was no reply, so I knocked again, but still no reply. I walked to the side of the house and looked through the window, the lights were on, there was half eaten food on the table “where was he” I thought impatiently. I slid the unlocked window up and hoisted myself through the window, I walked along the wall and turned on the lights, I wandered around the unfamiliar place looking for Jack, I opened one of the doors along the hallway, I’m pretty sure it was Jack’s bedroom so I went inside “Jack? Jack, are you here?” I loudly whispered. I walked around the small bed, my eyes widened as I let out a sharp gasp, I started to get light headed, I stumbled back in fear and fell to the ground, I pulled myself slightly back away from what I saw. I covered my mouth with my hand as I let out sharp breaths, tears gathered in my eyes, my vision went blurry as tears poured down my face and puddles on the floor.

What I saw was horrific, it was Jack, lying lifeless on the floor, a puddle of blood gathered beneath him, and a kukri point knife dripping with blood stabbed deep into the wooden floorboards next to him, the shiny silver was being suffocated by the thick, dark red blood. I pulled myself farther back as my face turned pale and covered with tears, and my hand grasping at my mouth as I gasped for air, I choked on my tears as I pulled myself up on Jack’s bed and stumbled out the door, my legs started to feel weak when I tried to get out of the room, I gagged and felt like I was gonna throw up, I went to the trash can and started to throw up brownish yellow chunk filled slop into the plastic trash can.

I stood up and wiped my mouth of the remaining throw up and then I heard a siren, slowly getting louder, I looked out the window next to the door and saw a flashing red and blue light getting brighter and the siren getting louder, I flailed to the open window that I opened earlier and lowered myself out of the window, I stayed as still as I could as I watched the police bust down the door from the window “we know your in here, come out with your hands behind your head” they shouted as they wandered through the house, I watched them go into Jack’s bedroom “in here” one shouted as the others ran into the room to see, one slipped on the floor and fell onto the others and pulled them down with him “marshal watch where you're going” one of them shouted while punching the shoulder of the one that slipped.

I slowly lowered myself all the way out the window and ran to the back of the house and ran across the many backyards of the neighborhood to get to my house, I slipped on one of the freshly watered lawns and let out a loud wheeze “I heard something over here” one of the police officers said as a flashlight flew behind me, I ran faster to get away from them, then I heard the sirens again, I turned my head to the street and saw the cop car speeding after me. I turned to the left and I run as fast as I possibly can, I glance back and I see flashing red and blue lights as the siren got quieter, I look forward and I trip over a giant log, I tumble down a hill “AAAAAAAAHHHHH” I scream as I am unable to stop myself as my arms reach out and flail around.

I roll down the hill as sticks and thorns claw at my shirt and pants, I can barely see the world spinning by me as I tumble down the hill, suddenly I hear a loud thud then darkness, I lay on the moss and pine needle covered ground. A little while later I sat up “what happened” I asked myself as I rubbed my head, I winced as I rubbed my forehead, I pulled my hand away quickly, I touched my forehead again, and I winced once again. I grabbed the tree that I hit and propped myself up, I felt light headed for a moment but then it stopped, I looked around, this place was unfamiliar and dark, the sun was starting to rise to my right, the light was a golden yellow as it seeped through the trees and resting on the mossy ground.

I looked around for anything familiar but nothing looked recognizable, I must of gotten mixed up when I fell down the hill, I wandered around toward the sun because I remember the sun rises in front of my house so I kept walking and walking, soon I stumbled into someone’s backyard, a loud deep barking came from the yard, I looked up and saw a large bulky, short haired dog, with dark gray fur and brown paws, I backed away from the dog and went to the front yard, I looked to the left then to the right, I jogged across the street to the local coffee shop and ordered a medium coffee with milk and two sugars. I sat down at one of the tables and took a sip from the steaming hot coffee, I sighed as I put the coffee down.

Someone came over and sat down across from me. I looked up, she had very short hair, it was sorta messy and flowed back, she had lovely hazel eyes and had wire rimmed glasses. She was looking down at a news paper, I saw my face on the back, I tried to hide my gasp as I read the headline “brook is wanted for murder and is still at large” with my picture below, the girl turned the newspaper over to read the back, her eyes widened and she slowly looked up, she raised her hand and pointed at me “y-y-you… YOU'RE A MURDERER!!” She shouted, and other people in the coffee shop looked at me “I’M NOT A MURDERER, I DIDN'T DO IT, I WAS FRAMED!!” I blurted as I ran into the glass door, I pushed on the door again but it didn’t budge, I tried again but it still didn’t open, then I looked at the knob, it was a pull door so I pulled it open, I felt ridiculous as I ran out the door.

I ran to an abandoned warehouse to hide from the police if the people in the shop called any, I went to a low window with a large crack draped across it and I elbowed it until the crack got bigger and more cracks appeared, then I slammed my elbow once more into the window and it shattered, broken glass blanketed the floor. The sun glistened on the shattered glass as I jumped up through the window, I walked across the floor and the glass crunched and cracked under my feet. I walked around the abandoned warehouse for a while, I looked in a large room with boarded up windows on the opposite wall, I walked in and found a desk, lined with paper and dust, I went to the back of the desk and found a partially open drawer, I wrapped three of my long slender fingers onto the dusty handle and pulled it open to find a piece of paper with pictures of kids with their names listed below, one was a girl named Isabella Johnson with pigtails and a crooked tooth, and on the picture a big red X covered the girls face. I looked along the page, more kids, and more X’s, then I looked to the left of the page and I saw Jack's face with a large X covering it and under it it said Jack Aklinn, lucky I wasn’t on the list but I had to stop whoever was doing this.

Suddenly I heard a sound, the tapping of shoes slowly walking down the hallway, I bolted to the closet across the room and hid inside, from inside I could sort of see the person but I couldn’t see their face. They walked toward the desk then stopped and slowly walked to the back of the desk, they looked at the still open drawer then looked up and looked around “Hey!” They blurted “I know someone is there, come out now” they looked around as they slammed the drawer. I could barely move in the cramped closet, I looked around for anything I could use to escape, then I saw it, a cold small black handgun, with a fully loaded chamber and some extra bullets next to the gun. I picked it up, my hands wrapped around the cold metal of the gun, my finger slid over the trigger, I examine the small gun, then I lift it up to the door right where I could see the other person, my finger slowly puts weight upon the trigger “I couldn’t possibly do this, I’m a good person,” I thought as I started to sweat “but if I kill this one person they will stop killing people” I closed my eyes and looked away as I pulled the trigger, BANG, I heard the person collapse to the ground in a loud thud.

I opened the closet door to find the person laying on the ground, with a bullet hole spewing blood right near their collarbone, he started to tremble as they looked up at me, their pupils shrunk as their eyes widened, they coughed and blood poured out of their mouth and they coughed again and it splattered across the floor, they sat up and leaned against the desk “why—“ they coughed again “—why did you do this, who are you”. My hand trembled and I dropped the gun, the cold metal of the gun collided with the stone floor as it made a loud clattering sound, I started to tremble as I stumbled backward toward the closet door, I leaned against the wooden door, it creaked as I put pressure on the door. I looked at my trembling hands, still cold from the cold gun, I glanced up toward the person I shot, I started to feel lightheaded and I collapsed to the floor into my knees, I grasped my hands around my head as tears poured from my eyes, the tears patterned quietly on the floor below me as I choked on my tears.

“Are you okay” a soft voice groaned, I looked up to the person I shot, I sniffled “what do you care” I said in a raspy voice “you seem troubled” they said as they coughed again “I’m sorry, I’m sorry” I whispered “don’t be” they said “by the way what’s your name, mines Jasmin” I sat up and wiped the tears off my face “mines Brook”. “I don’t feel so good” said Jasmin as they coughed and fell to the floor, I rushed over to them and grabbed their hand “No no no no no” I said “please don’t go, I didn’t mean to” I pulled their hand to my head and rested my head on their hand, tears started to pour from my eyes again. Their hand got cold and went limp, I let go of their hand and slowly put it down next to Jasmin. I looked at their face, a smile was draped upon their face, a smile slipped onto my face choking back tears.

I stood up, my legs felt weak as I tried to walk, I slowly went out the door, I turned around and looked at Jasmin’s lifeless body, I felt as if someone punched me in the gut, it felt like I was gonna throw up. I exited the abandoned warehouse and walked around with my hood over my head, I kept my head low as I walked around the street, I took a deep shaky breath trying to hold back tears. I started to head back to my street where my house is, but suddenly rain starts pouring down and the sky went dark, as I got closer to my street I felt hands wrap around my eyes and mouth, then I started to feel drowsy and I realized the hand around my mouth held a scrap of fabric doused with chloroform, I started to panic so I lashed around trying to break free but soon I felt drowsy and passed out. When I woke up, I was in a dark room on the floor, my hands and feet were tied together with a thick itchy rope, digging into my skin. I wiggled my hands trying to loosen it but it stayed tight “Help!!” I shouted but I didn’t hear anyone “Help!!” I shouted again hoping for a reply, but it was only followed by silence.

Tap, tap, tap, I heard tapping coming down what I think are stairs, the light from the top of the stairs illuminated in front of me and shined ever so slightly on me, a tall slender figure stepped slowly down the stairs casting a shadow over me, their long arm reached to the wall and flipped a switch and a fluorescent light illuminated above me, I squinted from the bright light and waited for my eyes to adjust, after a minute or so my eyes adjusted and I could nearly see the tall figure. The figure walked into the light, it was a man, he had dirty blonde hair, and green eyes. “Well well well, isn’t it our murderer” he said while kneeling down in front of me “I’m not a murderer” I said gritting my teeth, “of course you are, you can’t trick me” they said while lifting my head upward so I made eye contact with him, I pulled my face away and snarled at him “wow, a fierce one you are” commented the man while standing back up, he raised his hand and put it below his chin, he paced around, then looked at me “so who else are you planning to kill” he asked “like I said, I’m not a murderer” I replied, he started to get on my nerves for not believing me. He looked at me again but he looked disappointed “so, we can do this the easy way or the hard way” he started “the easy was is you confess your crime and go to jail, the hard way is you don’t say anything and we force you to confess” I sighed leaned against the wall, I started to chuckle “what’s so funny?” He asked “well no one knows where I am, or even cares I exist, and people who did care are gone now” my chuckle transitioned into sobbing, tears fell down my face as I slid down the wall to lay on the floor, a puddle of tears grew under my head.

“Oh dear” he muttered “what am I gonna do with you” he put his hand to his head and rubbed it, I still laid on the floor and my tears stopped but the small puddle of tears remained. He walked over to me and pulled me up by the collar of my shirt “HEY” I shouted as he lifted me up then pushed me against the wall while releasing my shirt. My legs laid out in front of me, he kneeled down and started untying my ankles, once he was done he threw the scratchy brown rope to the side “Stand up” he said in a stern voice, I stood up and he grabbed my shoulder and turned me around, he started to untie my wrists “there” he said as he took the rope off my sore wrists.

I rubbed my wrists as a small red ring remained on them, I glared at the guy “woah” he exclaimed and took a step back, my clothes still wet from the rain, sticking to my skin, I walked past the man and out the exit, I bolted out the building to appear in a damp dark alleyway and it was night, I elbowed into the wall and pushed myself forward off the wall and ran forward into the street. I looked around and saw two bright yellowish white lights speedily getting closer, I reached my arms in front of my face and flinched back, I heard a loud honk and a screech of the tires, I lowered my arms and opened my eyes to see the dirty white car in front of me honking their horn. I trotted to the sidewalk and out of the road, this was an unfamiliar road as my eyes darted around but all I saw was a local drug store and a restaurant ‘dine in and out’ was in red fluorescent lights. I walked around town looking for anything familiar, then I saw it, the abandoned warehouse where I shot Jasmin, I started to feel sick and almost threw up, I entered the warehouse, it was still dark and silent. I went to the room that Jasmin was in, the heavy metal door creaked as I shoved it open, I look in and see the lifeless body laying in a puddle of blood, it was so dark the blood looked black, I walked into the silent room and looked around then I heard something, I don’t know what it was but I heard something my eyes darted around.

My eyes adjusted to the darkness and I found the source of the sound, it was a rat underneath the desk, it scurried to the door as my eyes followed it. My eyes started to water as I remembered what I did to Jasmin, I wiped my eyes and looked around for the gun, I sweeped my hands across the cold stone floor. My hand bumps into the cold gun and I wrap my hand around it, I pick it up away from the floor, my warm hands wrap around the cold trigger and muzzle of the gun. I looked for a gun holder in closet that I previously hid in, I couldn’t see what was in the closet because it was very dark so I reached in and glided my hands across the items wishing the closet until I came across a small fabric pouch, I grabbed it and took it out and slid the gun in, it fit like a glove, I clipped it onto my belt and left the premises. The sun started to rise from the horizon, as I walked around the corner of the building “if they think I’m a villain might as well be one” I muttered quietly to myself.

I walked the dark streets of the town as the light from the sunrise seeped through the cracks of the buildings and trees, the sun started to pull across the sky and lit up the town as I walked to the park. I came across a few people early in the morning, going for jogs and stuff like that. I walked over to the pond, free from ripples and untouched. I looked down into the water to find myself, dark bags underneath my eyes from lack of sleep, my eyes were also droopy and slightly sore as well. I splashed some water from the pond into my face and wiped it off, it felt very refreshing and cold, my slightly wet hair stuck to my forehead as I stood up and headed to a breakfast restaurant. I went to the door of the restaurant and slightly pushed it but it was locked, next to the door was a schedule of when it was open, I believe it was wednesday and it didn’t open until 7:00 AM, I had no idea what time it was because I lost my phone, I haven’t realized I lost it before and frantically checked all my pockets but no sign of it.

I went over to one of the few people awake. “Do you know what time it is?” I asked a runner. He stopped and took out his phone “it’s 6:53” he told me and then proceeded to jog around the park. I went back to the restaurant and sat down at a wooden bench, it was white but the paint started to peel to reveal tan wood, I started to doze off at the bench then I fell asleep, the sound of people walking by woke me up. I headed into the restaurant and ordered some pancakes, it was a couple minutes and the food still hadn't arrived and I could hear my stomach rumbling. Then the waiter came by my table and carefully set down the large plate with golden pancakes layered in thick brownish-gold syrup. I slid my fork and knife into the fluffy pancakes and cut them into small squares and started to eat them. They were so delicious I finished them very quickly, and the waiter came back to my table “so how was your meal?” She asked “it was really good” I answered “so how will you be paying? Cash or card?” She suggested “oh, umm” I stuttered, I bolted up from my seat and ran to the door “sorry, gotta dine n’ dash” I blurted as I ran out the door “HEY YOU GOT TO PAY FOR YOUR MEAL” the waitress shouted.

I ran out of the building, I didn't know where to go other than my home, I made my way around town toward my house, the sun was directly above the town now and I was almost at my house. My neighborhood started to come into view and I could see my house, and jacks house, but jacks house had the lights on and I saw someone inside, I ran to jacks house and saw Jack, he was fine “fucking asshole” I mumbled to myself “he faked his death and I got blamed for it” I thought. My face naturally went into a scowl. I went to the front door and raised my hand to knock on the door but I stopped myself. "Should I confront him?” I questioned myself in my head, suddenly I started to feel light headed and the world started to black out and I collapsed onto the door. Well that’s what I get for skipping sleep for a couple days. My body started to feel cold, numb, and stiff and I was nearly able to move. I sat in front of a small open closet but inside the closet was nothing but the abyss, I looked into the darkness wondering what was inside, then something bolted out of the darkness, a hand. The pitch dark hand came out and wrapped around my arm as I still couldn’t move, more hands bolted out of the abyss slowly suffocating me in the inky darkness, some wrapped around my mouth and I was unable to shout for help. I bolted up, a cold chill went down my spine and I was covered with a cold sweat, it was just a dream. I thought while relaxing, I looked around and I was on Jack's doorstep, the lights were off in his house. How long was I out for, I thought as I rubbed my head and sat down on the doorstep.

I felt marcid and drained, I stood up but my legs refused to hold me up, I’m way too exhausted to walk. I pulled myself up on his door and twisted the copper handle, I fell inward as the door swung open, I looked around for Jack but I realized the house was completely empty except for me. I pulled myself up on the dining table and I heard the wooden floor creak ever so slightly, I could barely stand let alone walk, my eyes were so tired they could barely stay open and my eyes were burning and started to tear up and I could barely see. I patted down the walls in search of a light switch, then I heard a click and the lights flashed on, I rubbed my sore eyes until they cleared “Jake?” I questioned as it echoed through the empty house “Jake?” I said again but slightly louder, I stumbled around the house in search of him but had no luck. I collapsed back onto the untouched couch and put my palm to my head and groaned in pain, I think I was having a migraine but I don’t know because I never had one before, I slumped across the couch a and laid across it, I was extremely tired and I think I fell asleep for who knows how long, but when I woke up it was dark.

When I got up I was sore, like really sore, I walked out the door that I forgot to close, when I got outside it wasn’t cold or hot, it was kind of humid out but I proceeded to go back to my house, I could nearly walk on account of how tired I was, i stumbled my way back to my house down the street, i almost toppled over a couple times but managed to keep steady. But then everything went dark, and a high-pitched ringing was in my ears, and I felt myself hit the ground hard, then I heard a faint siren and red and blue lights. My eyelids were too heavy to keep open so I shut them. It's been awhile and i was still unconscious but I could hear everything that was happening, I heard people talking to one another on radios, with a static sound when they finished their conversions, I heard a heart monitor, beeping every so often. Where it smelled weird but good, like medicine and sanitizer. I opened my eyes and took a quick look around was wearing a strange thing blue gown, and there were two nurses beside me holding a clipboard with a paper on it and talking to each other, then one of them pointed back to me without turning around “this patient was found a couple nights ago passed out on the sidewalk, they didn't have any licenses on them when we found them, but they did have a gun. When we found them passed out we did a drug test to see if they were drunk, but they were clean. Were not sure the reason for the pass out” she continued to talk and talk about me, and if i was ok, then they started to turn around and i quickly closed my eyes to pretend I was still passed out, my heart started to pound faster with fear, the heart monitor started to beep faster which made my anxiety spike and my heart beat even faster, the two nurses rushed around my bed to check on the monitor, one tapped the glass and i tried to slow down my heart rate, very quickly it went back to normal “must have been a malfunction” one of the nurses said “yeah probably” agreed the other nurse, they walked back around the bed and left the room.

Soon later the lights in my room turned off and the hallway lights dimmed, a pale yellow fluorescent color. I waited a bit to make sure no one was in the hallway so I could make my escape. I sat up slowly and craned my head to the door then to my arm, it had four different needles in it, fastened on with a fabric like tape, all of them were attached to different thin tubes, i peeled the tape off and pulled out the needles one by one, it stung a little bit but once they were out, small drops of blood started to form at the hole in my skin where the needles once pierced, i wiped the blood away and stood up out of the bed, i felt dizzy and i had to grab the metal bar on the side of the bed for support, my head started to spin and i almost passed out, i felt winded and exhausted “how long was i out” i muttered to myself not expecting a response “you've been out for a couple days” said a soft calm voice from behind me, it was an young girl, it looks like she got her left forearm amputated, i nodded and stumbled my way out of the dark room and clung to the wall so i wouldn't collapse to the ground, the hospital seemed empty, no nurses in the hallways, or patients. My head slowly started to stop spinning and I could walk without the wall. I tried to be as quiet as possible so no one would know I was leaving. Soon after I got to the door and left, I had no idea where I was, who knows how far away I am from my house, how I would get home, I have no money, no friends, or family. “I'm a murderer” i whispered to myself, i sat down on the cold pavement, the sun has been down for a while, the cold wind bit at my skin through the cheap gown, i curled up and dug my face into my knees to hide the tears “what will i do now” i said while tearchoked “what do i do, i have nothing, i killed people, and for what” i could feel my eyes starting to burn as more tears flooded down my face and as i started to hyperventilate.

I felt a warm hand lay on my shoulder, i got startled and jerked away, i could barely see them through the tears, my shaky breath started to calm, and my tears started to stop “c’mon lets get you back inside” said the person, it was a female voice, it must have been one of the nurses that were in my room, she grabbed my hand and pulled me up. I wiped my tears from my eyes, then wiped my wet hand onto the gown and it left a salty tear stain, she lightly pulled my hand wanting me to follow her so i did, we went back through the sliding doors at the front and passed the main desk, there was still no one there, probably out for lunch or changing shifts. My tears fully stopped but my eyes still burned. She brought me back to the room i was in before with the girl, The nurse hooked up the the needles and tubes back into my arm where a red crusting smudge mark lay, a bubble emerged from the semi-clear bag attached to a tube that attaches to my arm “hmm” i hummed as i looked at the bag. “Whatcha thinkin bout” the nurse asked “what” i said because i was not paying attention to her “what-” “oh me” i said before she asked me again “just thinking” i fully answered, “about what exactly” she asked as she sat down at the foot of the bed “nothing important” i lied and looked in the other direction away from her but she was still in my peripheral vision, i could see she was worried about me, she stood up and the bed creaked ever so slightly without turning around. I watched her as she flipped the lights of and turned left down the dim lit hallway, soon the clock in front of me that was hanging on the wall turned its hands to 11 pm, it was starting to get late, when can i go home r if i ever go home, i began to get even more worried, my breaths became shallow and my eyes jumped around the room looking for an object that doesn’t exist, my heart beat slightly faster and my breaths got shallower and shallower to the point i couldn't breathe, my heart beat faster and faster, the beeping from the machine sped up, ‘what was happening’ i yelled to myself in my head, i couldn't speak, my throat became dry and scratchy from the breathing soon becoming raspy. The two nurses busted through the door in a rush to get to me but then everything faded to black, I heard yelling, and alarms, and people barking orders to one another ‘was I dead’ I thought to myself, I don't feel my heartbeat, i am calm, finally at peace. Then a flash of light blinded my eyes, soon later adjusted back to the hospital room as i bolted up from the bed, a cold sweat running down my back, “thank god, just a nightmare” i muttered as i wiped the sweat off my face and lay back down ‘but what if… nah it's stupid’ i thought ‘but what if it wasn't a dream, and i could have died’ i lay there staring at the off white ceiling… thinking.

The next day the nurses came in with my clothes “you are free to go” one of them spoke while the other came over and detached the needles and tubes from my arm, the other nurse put the neatly folded clothes at the middle of the bed near the edge “you can change, then sign the paperwork” she set down a clipboard with a piece of paper on it with a pen on top of the folded clothes “and then you're free to go” she finished, they both left the room and shut the door “it's nice you're getting out early” the voice startled me then i remembered the the girl next to me was there, her grayish maroon curtain made a wall around her bed, i stood up and started to get my clothes on, they smelled clean without a particular sent, but they also felt clean, they felt nice, still warm from the dryer. I sat on the edge of the bed and pulled over the clipboard but as ii did the pen fell on the ground with a light click and rolled partially under the bed, i bent down while still sitting on the bed reaching under the bed for the pen, but then i felt something it didn't feel like the pen, it felt like wood, i grabbed the wood object and pulled it out, it was a small antique wooden box. i held it in front of me on my lap and observed it, it was a mostly gray box but still had tints of brown from the aged wood, i turned the box around and found a tiny flip lock keeping it closed, i wedged my finger under the thin piece of metal trying to open it, whoever put it here must have put this here a long time ago, then my finger with a lot of force slammed the small lock onto the top piece of the box. I opened the box, it had a small note on it, the outside of it written on it said ‘for my love’, i folded the note open, it was frail and old, it was crumpled and ripped but was filled with love ‘dear my love, by the time you find this it will be too late, and i would have disappeared forever, it's not you it’s me, i've done many wrong things i'm not proud about, i hope you will still love me, because i still love you. Someday I hope we will find eachother again whether the earth crumbles or we bump into each other at the mall. I sure hope you can understand I will never stop loving you. Your dearest, jasmin’ tears swelled up in my eyes, jasmin can never find the one she loves ever again because of me, it's all my fault, my throat swelled and i began to choke on my tears, he will never know that she loved him. I signed the paperwork and grabbed the box then left. I sat at the empty bus stop waiting for the bus to arrive, tears still streamed down my face as the bus arrived, I wiped the tears and sniffled a bit, the doors of the bus swung open waning me to step inside. ‘Maybe I can start anew, be a different person, live a better life’ I thought, but then I realized that won't stop me from being a wanted criminal, that won't bring Jack back, it won't solve anything.

I sulked on the busses itchy fabric seat, alone, no one here but me and the driver, but it was nice to look out the window and look at all the good things in life, but maybe, just maybe i could be a new person, but i also didn't want to change i liked being wanted, you don't have to listen to anyone, you can just be free, but it fills me with dread when i think about the people i hurt like jasmin, but thinking about jack makes my stomach tie into a knot and i feel like i need to throw up, i remember his lifeless body draped across the floor as a bed of blood lies beneath him, and the knife, brutally stabbed into the floor. I wish that it never happened, i wish that jack never died so i wouldnt be a murderer, a fucking wanted criminal. This was the worst couple weeks of my life, everyone who cares about me is fucking dead, i wish i never existed. I stood up and pressed the button to let me off the bus and the bus halted to a stop, it was near the cliff of the town, the most popular attraction to go to, its where our founder founded the town, no one really visits it anymore, it's become gray, dull, and depressing, i walked for a couple minutes to get to the cliff, i stood atop and placed the wooden box beneath a nearby tree, the town draped across the valley like a pond “i can't do this anymore” i whispered to myself “I CAN’T FUCKING DO THIS ANY MORE” i shouted, i stepped closer to the edge, single tear fell from my eye, my stomach tied into a knot, i looked across the town one last time, gazing as the sun set, pulling the dark night sky over the town. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, i stretched out my foot over the cliff side “at least i saw the sunset one last time” i said to the darkness, i leaned forward over the cliff, waiting to fall, but then i felt two tender hands grasping the back of my shirt, and pulled me away from the cliff, i was choking on my tears “just let me do this” i push them away and i walk back to the edge, they wrap their arms tightly around me, and i kneel to the ground and they follow “please don't do this, you don't deserve it” they told me “NO I DO DESERVE IT” i yelled at them trying to squirm my way out of the hug but they only tightened their grip, i felt tears drip through the back of my shirt, they were crying, i stopped trying to get out and just accepted the hug. I started to cry more, i haven't had any love in so long i forgot what it feels like to receive it “th-than-nk y-y-you” i said tearchoked, “t-th-thank you” i muttered quieter to them. I started to quietly laugh, oh boy how i missed this, how i missed affection, i never want this to stop “i never want this to stop, i wanna stay like this forever” i croakaly said “dont worry im not going anywhere” said the voice calmly “its ok” they reassured me, i turned around and hugged them back, i never wanted to let go. They hugged me and i hugged them for awhile, this is the best i have felt in years, i wiped the tears from my eyes but they just kept coming, after my tears started to clear up i got a clear view of the persons face, it was the bus driver, they saw what i was gonna do, and they cared enough for a stranger to save their life, i have never met anyone like this… except jack, he would always care for others, and always helped people, the busdriver loosened their hug but i kept mine tight and firm “thank you jack” i whispered, i don't think the driver minded that i called them jack, just as long as i was safe “thank you” i said one final time.

[roanofarcc]

PROJECT SUNSHINE CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN → MYSTERY INC.

summary: steve harrington x oc | on ao3

when another product of Hawkins National Laboratory escaped a long-survived nightmare alongside her sister, she crashed into one unsuspecting teenage boy and dragged him deeper into the dark mysteries that made up their hometown.

word count. 1.7k || masterlist

warnings: cannon typical violence, child abuse, horror, gore, and depictions of mental illness. parts of this story were written pre-season 4 release. cannon divergence.

previous chapter ← → next chapter

Calum Miller stepped out of his best friend’s car and stretched his limbs. The winter air assaulted his face, and his old shoes squished in a pile of slush left on the curb. He cringed as his socks became wet and jumped onto the sidewalk. 

“She was cute, Mara,” he said, continuing their conversation from the car. “Can’t you let a man wingman?” 

With a roll of her eyes, Tamera slung her overnight bag over her shoulder. “Please, she was checking you out, not me.” 

“Whatever, she was dud anyways.” They both knew that wasn’t entirely true. The girl who worked weekends at the movie theater was cute, but she was more Tamera’s type than his. “We’ll find you someone who doesn’t over-salt popcorn, don’t you worry.” 

She laughed but cut herself off when her attention fell behind Calum, where his house sat. “Does your mom have company over?” Calum spun around quickly, nearly slipping on the icy sidewalk, and saw a series of shadowy figures that stood in the living room window. Calum couldn’t remember the last time his mother invited someone over, especially since his dad disappeared. 

“I don’t-” 

His mother’s silhouette threw her arms up in the air wildly. She yelled loud enough for Calum and Tamera to hear her outside and down the driveway. “Get out!” 

Worry flooded Calum’s chest and he raced inside with Tamera hot on his heels. The door was unlocked, and he threw it open with enough force that the doorknob on the inside smacked against the wall hard enough to leave a scuff in the paint. A series of strangers stood in his living room. Two tall men with their hands paused mid-reach into the inside of their coats, dressed in black suits. A shorter man stood closest to Calum’s mother, who looked a little less threatening in a blue sweater and a khaki-colored coat that almost reached the floor. 

“What’s going on?” Calum asked. 

Shannon Miller looked on the verge of angry tears as she glared at the shorter man. “You really want to do this in front of my son?” A nearly empty bottle of wine was clutched in her hands and her words came out a little slurred. 

The shorter man sighed and said, “Ma’am, please. I just want to have a conversation with you.” 

Tamera stood beside Calum with a stony expression as her gaze flickered between the men like she was studying them. “Who are you?” 

The shorter man extended his hand to Calum first, then Tamera. “I’m Dr. Owens. My friends here and I came to collect some old papers from your father’s office.” 

At the mention of his dad, Calum felt a surge of hope spring through him. “My dad? Do you know where he is?” His hope was very quickly squished by the frown on Dr. Owen’s face, and the shake of the man’s head. 

“No, son, I’m afraid I don’t. That’s why I’m here. He has a file here that we need to take back. I have a warrant to search his office.” He paused, flashing a piece of paper full of legal jargon that Calum didn’t understand. “Now, I understand he didn’t leave on the best of terms-” 

Calum’s mom laughed dryly. She clutched her wine bottle to her chest and made no effort to wipe the runny makeup on her cheeks. Calum hadn’t seen his mom in that state for some time. Normally, when Calum came home, she was already passed out or locked in her room. Maybe that part of her he was missing; he didn’t like it. He needed his dad back to fix it and make their family whole again. 

“He left because of you!” she yelled, swaying forward before Tamera caught her arm. More tears welled up in her eyes as confusion grew inside Calum. 

Dr. Owens shook his head once more. “I didn’t know your husband. I’ve never met him. And, if I did know about his whereabouts, I wouldn’t be here asking you for help.” He turned to Calum. “I am going search his office and get what I need. But I would prefer to do that with your cooperation.” 

It wasn’t like he could say no. Maybe whatever he needed was the key to finding his dad. “His office is down the hall, the last door on the left. But can I ask what you’re looking for, exactly?”

“I’m afraid I can’t disclose that information. But what I can tell you is that he was working on something very important and sensitive.” The man hobbled toward Calum, avoiding putting weight on one of his legs. He placed a warm hand on Calum’s shoulder and a scarily serious expression befell his face. “If there is anything you know about where your father might be, I need you to tell me.” 

Calum wished he did. “I don’t know anything.” 

“All right. Then, if you’ll excuse me, we’ll only be a moment.” The three of them disappeared into the home office. 

Calum turned his attention to his mom, who fell back onto the couch and muttered something under her breath over and over. “Mom, what aren’t you telling me about dad?” What could warrant someone with a warrant coming into their house? 

“He was a bastard,” Shannon whispered. “He was a bastard, but he wasn’t a monster.” 

“Why would anyone think that?” Tamera asked, but Calum’s mom said nothing. She just shook her head and finished off her bottle of wine. The three stood in silence as they waited for the men to finish searching. 

What could his dad have brought home that would be of such importance? Calum knew his dad worked for the government, but he never said much beyond that about his job. If his father was working on something, some file…oh. Oh, shit. Calum bit down on his lip to keep himself quiet. 

Oh, he was in trouble. 

A couple, of agonizing minutes later, Dr. Owens and the other men exited the office with a single box of papers. With a tight-lipped smile, Dr. Owens said, “Sorry for bothering you all. Have a nice night.” And then they left, just like that, with no further explanation. 

Once the door was closed and their car pulled disappeared into the night, Calum looked to his best friend with the calmest expression he could muster under his growing panic. “Mara, come with me.” He didn’t wait for her to answer before he took off down the hall and into his bedroom. He made a beeline straight for his closet and dug through his highest shelf frantically. 

“What the hell are you doin’? Are we not gonna talk about that dude? Or your mom’s freak out? What do you think they want from your dad?” 

Calum’s fingers touched a smooth stack of folders, and he quickly pulled them down and brought them to his bed. He searched through them until he found one that was thicker than the rest and held it up. “This, I think.” 

It took Tamera a moment to understand what he was saying, but when she did, her hand covered her mouth to muffle a surprised gasp. “Calum!” 

He cut her off and took a seat on the bed, letting the unopened folder fall to his lap. “Hush! Listen to me. When my dad was still here, I would go into his office all of the time and borrow office supplies for school. I needed some folders for class, so I took a couple I found in a drawer of his desk. I used a couple and left the rest in my closet until I needed them again. I thought they all were empty, but when I was cleaning out my closet a few weeks ago, I looked at them again and realized one was bigger than the rest. So, I opened it. There were some fancy-looking documents inside that I didn’t read. I figured it was old paperwork or something. I don’t know! But the more I think about it…I have a feeling it might be what those dudes were looking for.” 

He took a breath, drumming his fingers against the folder. “But the more I thought about the file, the more I wondered…I just had a weird feeling about it. I don’t know how to explain it. So, I flipped through a couple of pages of what looked like nonsense until I saw a page that had ‘classified’ written in huge letters across it. So, I stopped.” 

Tamera rubbed her temples like all of the information was painfully entering her brain. He didn’t blame her; he was feeling the stress pulse behind his eyes. “And you think that file is why those dudes were here?” 

He shrugged. “Maybe. It makes sense. Though, I don’t know how many classified documents my dad was hiding in his office."

There was a long pause, neither one of them quite sure of their next move. Calum had a feeling Tamera was going to tell him to call Dr. Owens back and hand the file over. That would be the right thing to do, maybe, but what if they thought Calum was somehow an accomplice or was trying to without evidence? He didn’t need any more trouble.

Much to his surprise, Tamera did the opposite of that. “Open it,” she said. 

“What? Open it? Mara, there could be anything in here. We could get in, like, a shit-ton of trouble.” 

She scoffed. “Oh, so now you’re worried about getting in trouble? This could be why your dad went missing. Whatever’s in the file could…” she trailed off, holding her head in her hands. “God, I can’t believe you sucked me into your bullshit investigation.” 

“You think so?” 

“I don’t know. But there’s only one way to find out.” 

Calum hesitated, wondering if he should protest, but his curiosity got the best of him. He held his breath and flipped open the file, right past the ‘classified’ page. 

Project 19-15-12-1-18

“Random numbers?” Tamera asked. 

“Unlikely. It’s probably code for something.” He continued to flip, but quickly realized most of the information was redacted. Whatever was in the file, someone didn’t want anyone to see. Calum wondered what his dad knew about the information. Was he the one who redacted it, or was he trying to figure out what the blacked-out lines read? 

He scanned the pages until he found a string of words that were on display.

July Twenty-Fifth, (redacted)…Project (redacted)...Test Subject Number 0-0-7…

Tag List. @sattlersquarry @leptitlu @echoing-oursong

[kahlanmars]

BAD FEELING part. 18

Do I have a problem? Probably. I can't stop writing. And if you want to listen to "Movement" by Hozier during this chapter I recommend it!!

MASTERLIST

18. Betrayal

After two hours you finish your dress, a simple blue dress that is a little too elegant for the district but absolutely plain and casual for Capitol City, but this is the best that you can do with curtains - curtains you never saw and that disappeared and you know absolutely nothing about it. 

You hear the door open and Effie comes into the room, with a wide smile on her face and red cheeks.

«Why are you here? I thought you would sleep at Portia’s.» You ask, as curious as a monkey. 

«We decided not to make it fast.»

Oh. You did everything fast. One minute you said something about your feelings and the moment after you were moaning on his disgusting bed.

But then again, you were going to die, they are not.

«Wise women. So…?» You pat the bed, so she could sit there. 

«I don’t know, Daisy. I really don’t know. Mather would kill me.» You stroke her hair. Now that she has natural hair she is even more beautiful, you think. Strawberry blonde hair, you have no idea why she used to hide them. If you had strawberry blonde hair you would show them off everyday. 

«Welcome to the club, we meet on Saturdays.»

«I always thought we were friends. I loved her, but… I loved her as a friend. And now I’m feeling something else. I don’t know what I like, but I know I like Portia. I thought about losing her and I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t breathe.» You take her hand.

When you discovered you liked Dianna you were terrified and alone, at the age of fourteen in your room with a big secret that you knew could be dangerous in a place like District 12. Now it doesn’t have to be like that for Effie. It won’t be like that for Effie, if you can do something about it. She is not alone. 

«I’m so happy for you, Effie. You deserve it.» You hug her tight. «And Portia is beautiful, you are beautiful, you will make a great couple at the party!» 

With the last word is like she wakes up from a dream, she has a wedding to prepare. She almost finished everything, always on schedule, always on time. 

«Oh yeah, the party. Do you want a dress? I managed to take some with me.» She opens the little wardrobe they gave you. There are two or three dresses, such a pity for all the beautiful things you are sure she has.

«Oh no I did it, but can I say it’s one of yours?» You innocently ask. «I don’t think they would like for me to use their curtains. And maybe Perla or Lora won’t have anything to wear.»

«Of course.» She laughs, but then her eyes soften a little. «Ehi, I’ve seen your mother around. She is always with that woman.»

That woman. Marjorie. You don’t really want to hate her, but it’s like she tries to steal everything from you. She befriended Holly, and you and your mother are not on the best terms right now. You say hi, ask her how she is and then nothing. It’s a pity, considering you two were really close before the games.

«Yeah, I know. They were friends when they were children or something, apparently Holly was her babysitter.» You scuff, clearly annoyed.

«Is that okay for you?» Effie is too polite to say what she wants to say. Holly, on the other hand, is never kind with her opinion on the woman.

«I suppose.» You look at her, «No. No, it’s not okay. She’s the woman that broke my heart. My mother shouldn't want to spend time with her.» You curl against her. You never sleep in your bed, maybe Portia won’t like it and you will begin to, but for now you want your cuddles. «Is that selfish of me?»

«Maybe.» She takes some hair out of your face. «But your mother should have you as a priority.»

«I don’t get it. She said she was sorry for Clark when she saw he wanted to kill me, now she is friends with the woman who stole Haymitch from me… and I know it’s bad to say, women don’t “steal”, but she kinda did it. Just her.» You pout. You are being unfair and you know it, Marjorie has been through hell, but she demanded her price without thinking of you. You were there. You exist.

«You know your mother didn’t want you two together.»

«Yeah, she probably is her best friend for this reason.» You shrug, «Maybe she would prefer me to be still perfect but dead.»

«Don’t even mention it. I prefer you very much alive, darling girl.» She wraps her arms around your waist.

«And that is why you are my best friend.» You watch her with a grin. «And now that Portia is your girlfriend, I can be your best friend too!»

«You are sweet, you know that?» She laughs at you. «Yes.»

After a morning spent trying to prepare a very frightened bride, it seems like you succeeded. Annie is beautiful in her white long dress, with her red hair wrapped in a complicated braid and a little bit of makeup on her face. She is very simple, the best definition for her is pure. She is pure.

She will be a very happy bride. 

«I’ll go check on the groom.» You announce, because you don’t trust the men to do a great job with Finnick. «I’ll come back.»

Finnick is, in fact, alone in his room. Stupid men. How is it that Annie is surrounded by her friends and the male companions didn’t think of it? Nobody should prepare himself alone on the day of his wedding. 

You knock, but he already saw you and he just smiles at you. «If you came because you are utterly in love with me and you want to beg me to cancel the wedding, I’m afraid I can’t anymore.»

You roll your eyes. «You break my heart.»

«Well with you in this dress, likewise.» 

His flirting means nothing, you are well aware he is stranded with love for Annie Cresta. You admit you are beautiful today, tho. The dress you sew yourself suits you like a glove, and now you are wrapped in a long blue dress with a low cleavage - just to spite your mother - and a round skirt. Your raven hair is up in a loose braid, and you went for simple makeup too, it is all you have after all.

«Do you need help with that, Odair?» You ask, lifting the tie. He does not, you already know that, they are great with knots in District Four, but it’s a bit of a tradition. Mags is not there for him, and nobody apparently cares enough to stand with him - he is very close to Katniss, but the poor girl is not in her right mind at the moment, losing Peeta broke her. 

You can step up for a minute.

«If you want.» He flashes a smile at you. He is so happy and so calm. He is twenty four and he is getting married, and he is calm.

«How am I more nervous than you are?» You tease, while you knot the tie. 

«Annie is the woman of my life and I love her?» He guesses. «I’m sure of my intention. I want a family with her, raise a bunch of children, and I want to love her forever. Why would I be nervous? This is the first thing I’m sure of in my entire life.» 

Your smile fades a little. You are being selfish, but you can’t help but compare the situation. Finnick is sure he wants a future with Annie, and they went through hell and back to be with each other. Finnick was abused, Annie was tortured, and yet they were never in doubt with the love they had for each other. She is his first thought in the morning and the last at night. They are what poetry is about. 

He was her mentor too. They have just a few years of difference, but he was the first fourteen years old victor in the history of Panem. He has loved her since he was sixteen, like in a fairy tale.

«I envy you. What you have is precious.» You cup his cheek on your hand and squeeze a little in reassurance. «I’m sure you won’t waste it.»

«You will have that too. One day someone will step on the door and you’ll know you will love him forever.» 

You can’t help but shake your head. «I wanted it with someone and he didn’t. End of story.»

«End of story? You are twenty four!» He protests, but you shush him. 

«This is your wedding day. Let’s not talk about me.»

«Finnick for fucks sakes why you didn’t tell me- oh. Sweetheart.» 

Haymitch barges in the room like a fury, raging about something until he sees you. He is in his jumpsuit, didn’t bother to change into something more fitting for the occasion, but he is still handsome. His hair is brushed and he cutted his beard.

Or she did it for him.

Capitol City, two days before the games

You have been in the bathroom for an hour now and you didn’t accomplish anything. Alone you would, but your mentor is not as disciplined as you.

«Dear heavens Haymitch, I will hurt you! I have a blade in my hand!» You laugh, trying to sneak out of his embrace. He doesn’t let you go, though. Too busy kissing your neck, biting your collarbone like a damn cannibal.

«Why bother with the beard when we could spend our time together in a different, tastier way?» He grins as he puts a hand on your thigh, trying to open your legs a little. He is not gentle, he is never gentle, but he can handle his strength and he is sure he is not hurting you. 

«Tastier? Am I a cake?» You giggle. 

«You are delicious, sweetheart.» Now his hand is definitely between your legs, and you can’t think about anything when he kisses you like that.

«And you will be handsome when we cut your beard! Hands where I can see them!» You order. 

«You like my beard.» He pouts. He actually pouts. He is adorable when he is vulnerable, and you can’t help but kiss him again and again and again.

«Yeah, when it’s in control. Now it’s out of control and your hands shake too much to do it alone.»

«I trust you with a blade, gorgeous.» He grins like a devil, «It’s just hard to stay close to you without touching you.»

«Really?» You wrap your arms around his neck. «Are you whipped like that?» 

«I refuse to answer.» He locks you in his arms and pecks your lips. «Hi beautiful.»  

You look at him in a way that you really hope he doesn’t understand. «Hi. We won’t shorten the beard, will we?»  

«Let's see, shorten a beard or devour my girl?»

In the end, you didn’t cut the beard.

«Hi.»

He looks at you. You feel proud that his eyes go wide and he can’t stop wandering through your body for a moment before recollecting himself. You always loved how he watched you, like you are something precious, to protect. You don’t think you need protection so much, but you want someone who is willing to do that.

And then you remember you don’t have him anymore.

«Hi.» You answer, trying to keep your voice down.

«You look nice.» He offers, as he takes a step next to you. You are not sure you want him close, if you can’t kiss him. 

«You don’t look so bad yourself. You shaved.» You point out, memories creep in your mind. 

He shrugs, «Yeah, I needed it and it’s a way to keep Katniss out of her thoughts.»

So it’s Katniss who helped him, not Marjorie. It’s nothing, but you feel happier already. Although you don’t know if it’s safe to keep Katniss near a blade right now. 

«She did a good job.» You grant. He takes another step closer to you.  

«She didn’t cut my throat and that’s enough, I suppose. Nice dress.» 

You can’t help but grin when his eyes stare again at your body, knowing that he wants it too. A month ago he could have ripped it out of you at the end of the day. You would lie if you refused to admit you did sew it thinking about his reaction.

«I did it myself.» You add, very much proud of your job. 

«You are talented, I’ll give you that.» He caresses your hip with the palm of his hand and you whimper. «Are you going alone tonight?»

«All alone, yes. Well, with Perla and Lora.» You don’t want to ask him that stupid question. You know he doesn’t go alone at the wedding, he is taking that disgusting woman and you don’t want to be reminded of that.

You don’t speak anymore and neither does he, but you stay there, he has a hand on your waist, you begin to do small circles on his arm with your finger, your hazel eyes locked into his blue ones, and you really don’t want to move because for a minute you can pretend he is taking to the wedding, that everything is normal again.

Until Finnick clears his throat. 

«I feel very much ignored on my wedding day.» He declares, annoyed and offended. «Now, Haymitch has to stay with me at the altar and Daisy needs to help Annie, so go.»

«I’ll go, I’ll go!» You jump at his voice and you run to the door, back to reality.

You end up crying at the wedding. The ceremony is beautiful, Finnick and Annie are burning with happiness and they are so beautiful, they sincerely look like a team. If there’s someone out there who deserves it it’s Finnick. 

Also, the cafeteria is very nice and you are proud of what you and the others have done, the atmosphere is almost magical for a grey and sad place such as District 13. 

When the groom and the bride start the dance, you go sit down at a table. You are not in the mood for dancing, not with Holly who watches you like a hawk and Marjorie who is begging Haymitch to take her for a dance, claiming too loudly that he danced when he was sixteen and it’s just like a bicycle.

Effie and Portia are dancing together, and you don’t want to disturb them, Lora is nowhere to be seen, you are content just to stay alone.

«I refuse to see you like that.»

Perla sits next to you and she takes your hand in hers, and she ignores your glare. She is very beautiful tonight, she borrowed a dress from Effie that fits her like a glove, a bustier sundress white and silver. Not exactly Effie’s colours - she’s great in golden, but then again she must have packed the most simple dresses she had. 

Her auburn hair is let loose on her shoulders and, well, her sparkling blue eyes are always mesmerising. 

«Perla! I was perfectly fine-»

«Watching your ex dancing with his girlfriend? No way. You are hot. You are young. He is the one who has to eat his guts in regret.» She seems very convinced, and she is your friend, but you would really prefer to stay on your seat. «I’ve met someone.»

«Perla, it’s fantastic! Who’s the lucky guy?» You ask her, curious, but she dismisses.

«Not important.»

«Must be very special.» You deadpan.

She ignores you. «What’s important is that he has a friend.» 

You immediately shake your head. «No way. I’m sorry but I’m not ready for…»

«I’m not offering you the love of your life! Flirt a little, give him a kiss, have mind blowing sex to help you forget! That’s what boys are for. His name is Caius. C’mon… you know you want it…»

You roll your eyes and you are about to say no, but then you see them. Marjorie succeeded in the begging, and now they are dancing and laughing about something. He is not a dancer for sure, but he is trying, and she looks like she’s having the time of her life, smiling so hard that her face will ache tomorrow. They whisper and talk and sometimes she gives him a kiss on the cheek, always a little closer to the mouth. 

They are objectively cute. Same age, same district, same passions and same history. Made to be together. 

You repress the urge to cry. 

«Okay.» You tell her, «Take me to Caius.»

Caius is a good looking man. He is thirty, a guard in District 13 (You wonder if there are other jobs in this bloody district), he has blonde hair and green eyes, he is fit and tall. Good looking indeed.

And he is utterly, majestically, completely boring.

He takes you to dance and his hands are too low on your back for their own good, while he has a smile on his face that you claim all your patience not to call “stupid”.

C’mon, you are being mean. You are being mean and he is surely a great guy.

«…And that is how I managed to become a guard. I’ve watched you in the games.» He begins, and you try not to tense. You never talk or think about the games, but during the night sometimes you scream until Effie wakes you up and then you cry into her arms. Saint Effie. «The way you killed that man? Clever.»

You force a smile at him. At least now he wants you to talk, after half an hour of monologue. «I wish I wouldn’t. I had to.» You remind him. It has not been exactly a choice. 

«Yeah, yeah, of course. Now you are safe.» 

«Thank you, by the way. Your district saved us.» Your bloody disgusting district who nearly killed your lover.

Ex lover.

«When we take the Capitol, everything will be like District 13.» You hope you die before it. 

«Although… There are things I miss. Like the sun. Or the clothes! Don’t you want your own clothes?» You try. You really miss the sun, you are used to take care of Haymitch’s garden at home, and grow your plants. You miss the damn geese. 

«What do you mean? You have clothes.» He is confused. It’s okay he is confused, he grew up in hell.

«These are not clothes, they are uniforms. Clothes are supposed to be different, to be yours. You can express yourself through your choice of clothing. Like, I used to braid daisies in my hair and embroider them in my dresses.»

«Why?» 

«Because… My name is Daisy.» You look at him and you decide that the talking part is done.

The kissing part is no better. You don’t have that much experience, but even his kisses are boring. There is too much tongue, his hands are exploring you like you are a new continent and yet you don’t feel anything.

Nothing. Dry like the desert. 

«You are beautiful.» He pants. That, you like. You don’t like so much he took you in a dark corner and started to kiss your neck, but then again… at least it’s not your mouth.

«Thanks.» You answer and you kiss him again, absolutely not because Haymitch is looking at you. 

«Can’t wait to be in my room.» He keeps going. He talks a lot. «The things I’ll do to you.» 

«Yeah? Like what?» You try, you really try. Your hand is on his firm chest and you lift up your leg a little against his pants, just to give him a peek of what it could be having you. 

«Well, like… well I’ll show you.» He blabbers and you reprime the urge to roll your eyes. 

«Of course you will.» You pat his chest in a very friendly way and straight up. «Excuse me, I have to go to the toilet.» 

«I’ll wait here!» He offers, but you shake your head.

«Don’t need to, I’ll find you!»

You won’t.

You run through the corridor and stay there. You are hiding like a coward, but it’s better to listen to him talking again and again and it’s surely better than watching the wonderful couple dancing together. Oh, and Holly was looking at you like you were a complete disappointment and you probably are and…

«There you are.» You suddenly feel a hug from behind and you are ready to tell Caius to go away, but it’s not his voice, it’s another. A voice that should be dancing with a new girlfriend.

«What are you doing here?» You ask harshly, but you relax in his embrace. 

«I’ve seen you storming out and I got worried.» He makes you turn around and his face darkens. «Why are you crying? Did he do something to you? I’ll-»

«No.» You put a hand on his chest to block him. You didn’t even realise you were crying. «He didn’t do anything. He is nice.» 

«You like him?» He asks, and his voice is more accusing than what he is right to be. 

«So what if I do?» You shoot back, but then you make a face. There’s no point in lying. «No, I don’t. I tried. He is fucking boring.»

«Sweetheart…» He cups your face with his callous hands. It’s funny, Caius is your age, he is better looking, he is fitter… and yet right now you would jump Haymitch’s bones just because he caressed your cheek. «That’s not how it’s supposed to be. You have to find someone you really like. Even if it takes longer.»

You really don’t want a lecture from him, just because he found his person, his “One”. He was your One. He has no right to tell you what to do.

«I just wanted to fuck.» You answer bluntly, or better yet, you lie. You had no intention of going into his room. «Do you have a problem with that too?»

«No.»

«Good. So don’t save me when I fall, don’t punch people because of me, don’t follow me in dark corners, don’t do anything! Don’t talk to me, don’t touch me because every time you do that I want you more!» You push him away, clearly hurt. He is taken by surprise. «So what if I want to fuck all the boys from District 13? I’ll do that and then I’ll fuck away the pain and it doesn’t matter if I’ll be-»

You can’t finish your sentence, because his lips are on yours in a crashing kiss. His arms are around your waist and his hands on your back and he almost crushes you, but you let him. In a moment you are against the wall, and you know you should stop but you won’t. 

«I can’t stop thinking about you.» He whispers against your lips. «I try and I end up following you like a fucking lovesick puppy.»

You can’t help but smile fondly. «Because I’m perfect.»

«Because you are perfect.» He agrees, even though it was a joke, and he lifts you up, his hands touch you in places that are his. There’s not even competition.

«I should let you go.» He murmurs, but this time you are ready, this time you kiss away his doubts. 

«Don’t let me go.» You whisper in his ear.

«I’m being selfish.» He protests, but your hands are already unbuttoning his shirt. «When I saw you with that man I-» He kisses you again, with rage, with jealousy, but when the clothes are on the floor and you two are one, there is no doubt who you belong to. 

taglist: @crimsonincursive

[the1975attheirverybest]

just had this idea and couldnt not share it:

Going to the studio one day w/ Matty and seeing them work so passionately and excitedly. Maybe your eyes drift to Matty’s hands as he is speaking or touching dials on the sound board. Your mind starts racing and suddenly you need him now. You try to get his attention and he keeps brushing you off saying he has to finish the part he thought of until in front of everyone he hears a firm “Matthew Healy.” With that, he knows what’s happening and he makes everyone take lunch. You can come up with the rest, whether he is dom/sub and just exactly HOW you need him.

idk thought this could be a fun little thing to write :)

OKAY BUT PLEASE THIS PLAYS RIGHT INTO MY FANTASY!!! Cuz have y’all heard those two “Tape Notes” episodes?! NOTHING is hotter to me than when Matty talks about how some songs were made. And like, I only play guitar, so I don’t really know that much technical stuff about music production but it’s still SUCH A turn on. Just how much he loves his job and how if the drums are even a notch too loud/ too low, he hates it. AND if the guitar is “too perfect” he won’t let it go. It has to sound a little bit warped. His whole “faded splendor” bit that he loves to bring up in every interview. Ugh. So. Fucking. Sexy. So, yeah, I’d imagine if he ever brings his partner around the studio, it would be….a lot.

Like imagine watching him sit there, between the mixing board on one side, and the big computer on the other. And he’s just in his chair, wheeling back and forth between the two, testing out different variations, asking George why it’s not quite right yet.

George is just like “okay, how about we loop the drum track so it keeps playing throughout the song.”

But Matty immediately scuffs, hating the idea. “That’s just lazy musicianship. If the emotion shifts and the words change, the melody has got to change with it. Don’t go with the easy option.”

George is frustrated. “I wasn’t bein’ lazy; I was keeping literally the one thing you said you liked about the arrangement. The fuckin drums.”

Matty frowns, deep in thought, picking at his lower lip, a subconscious habit he doesn’t realize he’s doing half the time. “Nah, there’s something else we haven’t thought of. Let me hear it again?” And he puts the headset on, but only one ear, so he could leave the other ear available to George as they talk through it.

“Don’t like it. Nope. It just sounds too put together. I hate that.”

“I know. I get that. I just don’t know what would make it less crisp without- like getting in the way of the song.”

At this point, she’s melting, obviously. She’s way past listening to their actual conversation, and is just watching Matty’s fingers push the buttons on the mixing board, wishing that the machine were her body instead. Memorizing the way his fingers slide the dial from one side to the other to create that distorted effect that he wants, and imaging instead that he is sliding his finger down her body, anticipating him touching her core. She shudders slightly, reminding herself that there’s people around.

She decides he needs to be as worked up as she is. So she walks over to him, hugging him from the back of the chair, sliding her hands down his chest and kissing his earlobe seductively whispering something about taking a quick break to “refresh” his mind and body. He’s too in the zone to catch onto her innuendo, though, so he shrugs her off, mumbling something about how taking a break and interrupting the process would be the absolute worst thing he could right now. He’s just on the cusp of a break through, he can FEEL it. He just needs to put things together the right way.

His absent-mindedness is weirdly even more attractive to her. The fact that his mind could be so absorbed in something that he loses his sense of his surroundings makes her heart swell and the rest of her body get turned on. Maybe it’s the joy written all over his face when he’s engaged in something that he so clearly loves, maybe it’s the way he completely opens up when working, whatever it is, it’s HOT as fuck and it makes her want him more.

She keeps trying. She scoots her seat next to his, brushing her arm against his as he squints into the screen, fiddling with the production software, having taken over from George. She brushes his curls out of his eyes so “he can see better.” But nothing is working. So, finally, he’s out of subtle tricks. She has to resort to blunt honesty. She takes a deep breath, standing up with a hand on her hip and yelling out “Matthew Timothy Healy! What on earth is wrong with you? I’m trying to fuck you over here!”

Matty finally looks up, taking the headset off his ears and holding in a giggle. He looks at her, winks, and turns to the guys. “George…you guys are….hungry right now, yeah?”

George takes the hint and rounds everyone up and they all leave. The door is barely closed behind them before Matty springs to action, hoisting her up by the waist, and setting her onto the desk. Apparently, her willingness to announce to the world that she wants him to rail her to death is as attractive to Matty as his passion is to her. So he gets right to it, knowing that she’s been ready and desperate for a minute now.

His hands are shoddy, just grabbing and squeezing wherever they land, kisses whiny, swallowing each others high-pitched moans. He alternated between kissing and biting down her body, to keep her on her toes. Just when she thinks she’s got his pattern down, he changes things up. He all but tears her shirt apart, taking her nipple into his mouth, sucking, causing her to cry out. His hand is on the other breast, squeezing, pinching, scratching. Her brain goes into overdrive r from the mixture of sensations. Some soft, some rough, some tingle, some hurt. She can’t keep up, and when he’s ready to make her cum, he pushes her to lay down on the table. She mumbles something about laying on top of his expensive equipment and he says he doesn’t care.

“You don’t; but George might.”

“Oh, whatever. That mixing board is mine anyway.”

When he pushes her arms above her head to hold her wrists in place as he fucked into her, one of her fingers accidentally turns the recording button on. Matty’s too caught up in making absolutely sure he makes it hard for her to stand after this, to notice what’s happened. So as she whines, begs, and chants his name, the computer is getting it alllllll on record. When they’re eventually done, and Matty is kissing all the spots on her body where he might have left bruises, he notices the green light is on, which indicates recording. He laughs, and goes to the computer to click “play” on the file.

She’s stunned in place. Her hand goes to cover her mouth. Her face is turning every shade of every color in embarrassment, but Matty is absolutely loving it. He clicks “save.” And she squeals and yelps and kicks her feet and wants to kill him.

But he’s all like “well, listen, this might just be the missing ingredient that we’ve needed all day.”

Yeah….I think about studio Matty a lot.

[cospple]

costco x apple cider CHAPTER ONE!

TW: fighting, yelling, british, idk what else so i apologise if i forgot anything!!!

Authors Note: there’s like. a lot of grammar issues in here, those are because i was lazy. however any spelling mistakes are on purpose fuck the english language. (also i apologize to anyone who isn’t on mobile because i wrote this in my notes app so it’s formatted for mobile)

without further ado, here is our first chapter, enjoy <3

********************************************

APPLE

hi my name is apple marie cider and i have long light brown hair and brown eyes. i grew up on an apple orchard (which is how i got my name). i’ve lived in the same small town, on the same 50,739 acre apple orchard for my whole life. the only good thing about this town is the people. well, not ALL of the people. take my sworn enemy, Costco, for example. HIS FULL NAME IS LITERALLY COSTCO COSTCO COSTCO!!! him and his family have been my sworn enemy since generations back. you see, it’s a sort of family feud.. years ago, starting with costcos and my parents, (costcos family owns the town market) costcos mother WOULDNT let my parents sell their apple cider at the market and insulted us for being farmers.. the feud passed down generations, which is why Costco bullies me. in our little town, everyone who knows anyone knows that Costco is an Alpha. you can’t go anywhere without hearing about it. not even the library. i myself am more of an omega. i just don’t like the idea of being mean to people!!! anyway, aside from Costco (i roll my eyes just thinking about him), everyone here is pretty great!

i get up out of bed, put on my overalls and a black t shirt, then i head off to town. i was walking the dirt road from my barn to town, when i felt it. Costco was out there somewhere. wandering around. looking for a submissive and breedable type. “not today Costco.” i whispered under my breath. i would NEVER go out with him. i made my way through town, walking fast. a lot of faces passed, but thankfully none of them were Him. i stopped into a few stores, avoiding Costcos family market. then i picked up the dry cleaning, when all of a sudden…

“hey Apple!” a voice shouted at me. i looked up from my grocery list, and who should i see other than Costco.

“great…” i muttered under my breath. “what do you want, Costco?” i said rudely.

“oh, nothing, nothing…i just couldn’t help but notice that you went to every shop in town, but mine! odd, huh?” he said mockingly.

i rolled my eyes at him. “maybe if your parents weren’t douchebags-“

“HEY!” he barked. “don’t talk about my parents that way! EVER.” i began to shake. i don’t like when people raise their voices at me. i shivered and turned away from him, then began the long and treacherous journey back to my barn.

when i got home, momma stopped me at the door. “are ya’lright honey? have ‘nother run in with Costco?” she said empathetically.

i sighed. “it’s nothin’ momma.. i won’t let him get to me.” 

she smiled her warm apple pie smile and said “good. he ain’t gonna rattle us now, is he? we got a iron clad foundation.” i smiled softly at her, then made my way into the house. i set our groceries on the counter and brought the laundry to my room. then i thought i oughta go talk to pa about what Costco said.

********************************************

COSTCO

i took the limo back to my mansion up on the hill, overlooking our vast empire that was the town supermarket. 

“thanks Lionel.” i said, being sure not to scuff my new italian shoes as i stepped out of the limo. 

“pip pip, cheerio!” he called as he drove to the family car park. i swiftly walked into the foyer, where i made sure there wasn’t so much as a spec of dirt on my clothing. i had been far too close to that farm girl during the conversation we had. i was worried she may have given me a disease, like herpes or the bubonic plague. 

after i was sure there were no bacteria on my suit, i walked into the mansion. i walked through our pristine, pearly white halls until i reached my fathers study. 

“hello, father. you will be happy to hear that i-”

“Costco, how many times have i told you? do not disturb me while i am working.” he sternly told me.

“my apologies father…” i said, backing out of the room. he never listens to me.. and i know not to disturb mother down at the market. if i am there it could scare away potential investors or customers, due to my intimidating nature.

instead, i walked through our large, clean, house, smiling at the large painting of the Costco market, no apple cider family products in sight. it gave me a warm and fuzzy feeling, knowing that they are banished to other markets.  a feeling that is, for an alpha like me, unfamiliar. i shrug it off, deciding to go work out in my gym until dinner.

********************************************

APPLE

the next day i woke up in my bedroom. it was raining outside, which is good for our crops. i looked around my pastel pink room, thinking about how happy Costco must be. it’s cold and dreary outside, just like his soul. STOP!! WHY ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT HIM??? i thought angrily. what i SHOULD be thinking about is breakfast. i have to go eat my oatmeal, and then i should put on my red poncho and go feed the horses and check the chicken coop for eggs. Costco has no place in any of that. he’s never worked a day in his life! i put my hair in a ponytail and i pulled on a clean pair of jeans, with holes in the knees from kneeling to wash the horse stalls. i put on a long sleeved navy blue henley and my poncho and rain boots.

after doing my morning chores, i went to find momma and pa, and say goodbye before i head off to school. then i put on my rainboots and began to walk to the bus stop. it was raining hard, so i had to put my backpack under my poncho. after 2.11 miles of walking, i made it to the bus stop. there were a few other kids there, but then came Costco. looking UGLY as ever in his stupid Vicuna suit and dumb Italian shoes. god, he needs to get therapy or something. 

“hey Cider, where’d your hunchback come from?” he called out in his stupid stupid accent. OH NO. MY BACKPACK UNDER MY PONCHO LOOKS LIKE A HUNCHBACK?? i thought, feeling like an idiot. everyone at the bus stop began to laugh. hard. this caused me to shake, tears welling up in my eyes. 

“aww what’s wrong? not alpha enough to handle some laughter?” something about the way he said it made me shiver. 

“shut up…” i mumbled. i won’t let him get to me, even as the tears spill over my eyes. his expression seemed to almost.. soften as he realized how his words affected me. he put his hands in his pockets and looked at the wet ground. his hair began to dampen, he must have been too busy looking at himself in the mirror to put on a rain jacket. i couldn’t help but notice the way his icy blue orbs seemed to glow, even as his hair fell in front of them. i then realized i must look odd, i was staring at my sworn enemy as if i…liked him.. or something. now THAT would be funny!

the bus finally arrived, and we boarded back to front. i ended up somewhere in the middle, sitting alone. no one wants to sit next to me because im a stupid farm girl. suddenly i felt the air seem to grow thicker, the room darker, colder even. and who should sit next to me but the one and only Costco. in the moment i wished i had sat in the back, next to stinky John, because at least then i wouldn’t be stuck here, next to the most wretched, evil creature ever to walk the earth. 

“look, i know im an alpha, and.. i don’t usually say stuff like this, ESPECIALLY not to YOU. but… im sorry for what i said at the bus stop. i saw how it affected you and i just… never mind its dumb anyway..” he said shyly. i’ve never heard Costco say something like that before. 

“oh. um- i- i- i guess its uh- it’s fine. it’s no big deal- i guess…” i said, hoping he couldn’t tell i was nervous to be around him. i don’t even like him, yet he makes me stumble over every other word. it’s crazy! 

we didn’t talk for the whole rest of the bus ride. we finally got to the schoolhouse 20 minutes later. we got off the bus and went our separate ways, thank god. i don’t want to talk to him again today. he kind of scared me, being so…nice…like that on the bus. he’s NEVER like that, especially not to me. 

********************************************

COSTCO

i can’t believe i just apologized. to APPLE!! i never apologize! to anyone! i’m too alpha for that. god, that stupid little omega is going to ruin my reputation. i can’t have that. i walked through the hallway, almost hitting the ceiling with my 6’5 frame, making sure to keep my head up. this way everyone knows that im the best. omegas cower at my mere presence. “heh..” i chuckle to myself under my breath. especially that wretched omega farm girl. i thought in my head. 

i sit down in finance 101, ready to learn, when all of a sudden..

“hey, Costco! is it true that you got RABIES from Apple Cider??” a girl asked me. i don’t know her, but she seems like a beta type. which means she should NOT be speaking to me.

“excuse me?” i said calmly.

“well..y’know, because you two are like..”

“like WHAT?” i asked, my temper slowly rising. 

“well…i dunno. i don’t remember. sorry to bother you, mr.” and then she ran off. 

if this stupid beta thinks that ME, COSTCO C. COSTCO, would EVER be associated with that farm girl, i might just murder someone. the whole town seems to think we LIKE each other. which is absurd, obviously. we very clearly despise each other. the mere idea of us being together makes me throw up in my mouth. because if i let the puke out it would get on my new suit. and i cannot let that happen, this is VICUNA for Christs sake! 

anyway, that beta clearly knows nothing about me. the closest i’ve been to that lice infected farm girl was sitting beside her on the bus. and even THAT i didn’t want to do. i just hadn’t meant to make her cry. father says making people cry is apart of the job. i don’t want to be anything like him. i want more than this. i always have. i mean, seriously, who wants a trust fund and a job in finance?

my “friend” (aka the son of my fathers business partner) James walks over and takes a seat next to me. 

“Hello, Costco!” he says cheerfully.

“hi, what are you so happy about?” his happiness disgusts me.

“Well, if you must know, my dad just signed a contract with a major company, meaning I get to intern there next fall!”

“oh, isn’t that just delightful.” i say sarcastically. who even wants to intern at a finance company?? before James can respond, our teacher begins class.

********************************************

APPLE

“OMGOSH YOU SAT NEXT TO COSTCO ON THE BUS??” my best friend Orange whisper-yelled at me. 

“well i- i mean yeah, but like i said, it- its not that big of a deal. it was just.. weird.” 

“weird like sexy or weird like odd?” 

“ugh, Orange, gross!” i say, scrunching my nose at her.

“just askin!” she shrugs.

“okay, well as i was SAYING. he sat next to me, and then-“

“Ladies, what is so important that you absolutely must talk about it while i am telling you about your assignment?” Mrs. Jones, our biology teacher, said.

we both mumbled apologies, and turned away from each other. for the rest of class, i sat silently taking notes. we were learning about cells, and to be real honest, if we didn’t have a final for this class i wouldn’t be paying attention. cells are really boring. after class, we resumed our conversation. 

“yeah! he straight up apologized for making me cry! what has gotten into him??”

“it’s so obvious, Apple!” she says excitedly.

“what?!”

“girl, Costco has a huge crush on you!! why else would an alpha like him express his feelings!! plus, HE literally sat next to YOU! guys don’t do stuff like that unless they like you.” she says, nodding her head like she just bestowed some vast knowledge upon me.

“Orange. you’re delusional. he only sat next to me because he had to! there were no other seats!!” she rolled her eyes and shrugged. 

“whatever you say! anyway, im off to algebra. see you at lunch!” she called as she skipped off. 

she’s so insane! Costco? having a crush on ME???  never in a million years! he doesn’t even LIKE ME! because we’re SWORN ENEMIES!! gosh, that’s such an absurd idea…

[deer-thing-iz-cool]

I made a story, it’s kinda long, you will no doubt cry

“So what are you doing for dinner?” I asked my friend as we walked down the street. “I don’t know, mac and cheese maybe?” We proceeded to walk down the street, the shops soon ended and the neighborhood began. As we walked further Jack's house came into view “see you later” he blurted as he jogged back to his house, my hand slowly raised and slightly waved “bye” I said quietly. As I walk a little longer to my house the sun starts to go down and the yellowish lamp posts flicker on, one by one illuminating the streets, when I get to my house the sun has already gone down, I pull out my copper and silver keys attached to a silver ring, they make clunking sounds as I lift them to the door. I hear the door unlock as the keys rotate, I twist the handle and pull the door toward me, my dirt embedded shoes stepped through the door frame, I kicked off my shoes, one landed upside down, and the other hit the wall leaving a light brown scuff.

I walk to my room, it has a large bed, a dark blue blanket and pillow, fake vines draped across the ceiling twined with string lights, and at the corner of my bed there is a small mountain of stuffed animals. I walk to the edge of my bed and face plant into the pile of toys, I roll off them and into the open part of my bed, I pull out my phone and go to texts “whatcha doin” I text to Jack, a small buffering symbol popped up on his side ���eating mac and cheese” he texted, “what are you doing” he asked back “nothin much, just laying in bed” I replied. “Noice” he replied, I chuckled “wanna hang out tomorrow” I asked “sure” he replied, I put my phone on my light stand and went to bed.

In the morning I slid on my dirt embedded shoes under the scuff on the wall “I’ll clean that up later” I said as I slid on my sweatshirt, I pulled out my keys and I fumbled them but caught them before they fell, I exited my house and locked the door. I was in an upbeat mood as I went to Jack’s house, once I got there I knocked on the door, there was no reply, so I knocked again, but still no reply. I walked to the side of the house and looked through the window, the lights were on, there was half eaten food on the table “where was he” I thought impatiently. I slid the unlocked window up and hoisted myself through the window, I walked along the wall and turned on the lights, I wandered around the unfamiliar place looking for Jack, I opened one of the doors along the hallway, I’m pretty sure it was Jack’s bedroom so I went inside “Jack? Jack, are you here?” I loudly whispered. I walked around the small bed, my eyes widened as I let out a sharp gasp, I started to get light headed, I stumbled back in fear and fell to the ground, I pulled myself slightly back away from what I saw. I covered my mouth with my hand as I let out sharp breaths, tears gathered in my eyes, my vision went blurry as tears poured down my face and puddles on the floor.

What I saw was horrific, it was Jack, lying lifeless on the floor, a puddle of blood gathered beneath him, and a kukri point knife dripping with blood stabbed deep into the wooden floorboards next to him, the shiny silver was being suffocated by the thick, dark red blood. I pulled myself farther back as my face turned pale and covered with tears, and my hand grasping at my mouth as I gasped for air, I choked on my tears as I pulled myself up on Jack’s bed and stumbled out the door, my legs started to feel weak when I tried to get out of the room, I gagged and felt like I was gonna throw up, I went to the trash can and started to throw up brownish yellow chunk filled slop into the plastic trash can.

I stood up and wiped my mouth of the remaining throw up and then I heard a siren, slowly getting louder, I looked out the window next to the door and saw a flashing red and blue light getting brighter and the siren getting louder, I flailed to the open window that I opened earlier and lowered myself out of the window, I stayed as still as I could as I watched the police bust down the door from the window “we know your in here, come out with your hands behind your head” they shouted as they wandered through the house, I watched them go into Jack’s bedroom “in here” one shouted as the others ran into the room to see, one slipped on the floor and fell onto the others and pulled them down with him “marshal watch where you're going” one of them shouted while punching the shoulder of the one that slipped.

I slowly lowered myself all the way out the window and ran to the back of the house and ran across the many backyards of the neighborhood to get to my house, I slipped on one of the freshly watered lawns and let out a loud wheeze “I heard something over here” one of the police officers said as a flashlight flew behind me, I ran faster to get away from them, then I heard the sirens again, I turned my head to the street and saw the cop car speeding after me. I turned to the left and I run as fast as I possibly can, I glance back and I see flashing red and blue lights as the siren got quieter, I look forward and I trip over a giant log, I tumble down a hill “AAAAAAAAHHHHH” I scream as I am unable to stop myself as my arms reach out and flail around.

I roll down the hill as sticks and thorns claw at my shirt and pants, I can barely see the world spinning by me as I tumble down the hill, suddenly I hear a loud thud then darkness, I lay on the moss and pine needle covered ground. A little while later I sat up “what happened” I asked myself as I rubbed my head, I winced as I rubbed my forehead, I pulled my hand away quickly, I touched my forehead again, and I winced once again. I grabbed the tree that I hit and propped myself up, I felt light headed for a moment but then it stopped, I looked around, this place was unfamiliar and dark, the sun was starting to rise to my right, the light was a golden yellow as it seeped through the trees and resting on the mossy ground.

I looked around for anything familiar but nothing looked recognizable, I must of gotten mixed up when I fell down the hill, I wandered around toward the sun because I remember the sun rises in front of my house so I kept walking and walking, soon I stumbled into someone’s backyard, a loud deep barking came from the yard, I looked up and saw a large bulky, short haired dog, with dark gray fur and brown paws, I backed away from the dog and went to the front yard, I looked to the left then to the right, I jogged across the street to the local coffee shop and ordered a medium coffee with milk and two sugars. I sat down at one of the tables and took a sip from the steaming hot coffee, I sighed as I put the coffee down.

Someone came over and sat down across from me. I looked up, she had very short hair, it was sorta messy and flowed back, she had lovely hazel eyes and had wire rimmed glasses. She was looking down at a news paper, I saw my face on the back, I tried to hide my gasp as I read the headline “brook is wanted for murder and is still at large” with my picture below, the girl turned the newspaper over to read the back, her eyes widened and she slowly looked up, she raised her hand and pointed at me “y-y-you… YOU'RE A MURDERER!!” She shouted, and other people in the coffee shop looked at me “I’M NOT A MURDERER, I DIDN'T DO IT, I WAS FRAMED!!” I blurted as I ran into the glass door, I pushed on the door again but it didn’t budge, I tried again but it still didn’t open, then I looked at the knob, it was a pull door so I pulled it open, I felt ridiculous as I ran out the door.

I ran to an abandoned warehouse to hide from the police if the people in the shop called any, I went to a low window with a large crack draped across it and I elbowed it until the crack got bigger and more cracks appeared, then I slammed my elbow once more into the window and it shattered, broken glass blanketed the floor. The sun glistened on the shattered glass as I jumped up through the window, I walked across the floor and the glass crunched and cracked under my feet. I walked around the abandoned warehouse for a while, I looked in a large room with boarded up windows on the opposite wall, I walked in and found a desk, lined with paper and dust, I went to the back of the desk and found a partially open drawer, I wrapped three of my long slender fingers onto the dusty handle and pulled it open to find a piece of paper with pictures of kids with their names listed below, one was a girl named Isabella Johnson with pigtails and a crooked tooth, and on the picture a big red X covered the girls face. I looked along the page, more kids, and more X’s, then I looked to the left of the page and I saw Jack's face with a large X covering it and under it it said Jack Aklinn, lucky I wasn’t on the list but I had to stop whoever was doing this.

Suddenly I heard a sound, the tapping of shoes slowly walking down the hallway, I bolted to the closet across the room and hid inside, from inside I could sort of see the person but I couldn’t see their face. They walked toward the desk then stopped and slowly walked to the back of the desk, they looked at the still open drawer then looked up and looked around “Hey!” They blurted “I know someone is there, come out now” they looked around as they slammed the drawer. I could barely move in the cramped closet, I looked around for anything I could use to escape, then I saw it, a cold small black handgun, with a fully loaded chamber and some extra bullets next to the gun. I picked it up, my hands wrapped around the cold metal of the gun, my finger slid over the trigger, I examine the small gun, then I lift it up to the door right where I could see the other person, my finger slowly puts weight upon the trigger “I couldn’t possibly do this, I’m a good person,” I thought as I started to sweat “but if I kill this one person they will stop killing people” I closed my eyes and looked away as I pulled the trigger, BANG, I heard the person collapse to the ground in a loud thud.

I opened the closet door to find the person laying on the ground, with a bullet hole spewing blood right near their collarbone, he started to tremble as they looked up at me, their pupils shrunk as their eyes widened, they coughed and blood poured out of their mouth and they coughed again and it splattered across the floor, they sat up and leaned against the desk “why—“ they coughed again “—why did you do this, who are you”. My hand trembled and I dropped the gun, the cold metal of the gun collided with the stone floor as it made a loud clattering sound, I started to tremble as I stumbled backward toward the closet door, I leaned against the wooden door, it creaked as I put pressure on the door. I looked at my trembling hands, still cold from the cold gun, I glanced up toward the person I shot, I started to feel lightheaded and I collapsed to the floor into my knees, I grasped my hands around my head as tears poured from my eyes, the tears patterned quietly on the floor below me as I choked on my tears.

“Are you okay” a soft voice groaned, I looked up to the person I shot, I sniffled “what do you care” I said in a raspy voice “you seem troubled” they said as they coughed again “I’m sorry, I’m sorry” I whispered “don’t be” they said “by the way what’s your name, mines Jasmin” I sat up and wiped the tears off my face “mines Brook”. “I don’t feel so good” said Jasmin as they coughed and fell to the floor, I rushed over to them and grabbed their hand “No no no no no” I said “please don’t go, I didn’t mean to” I pulled their hand to my head and rested my head on their hand, tears started to pour from my eyes again. Their hand got cold and went limp, I let go of their hand and slowly put it down next to Jasmin. I looked at their face, a smile was draped upon their face, a smile slipped onto my face choking back tears.

I stood up, my legs felt weak as I tried to walk, I slowly went out the door, I turned around and looked at Jasmin’s lifeless body, I felt as if someone punched me in the gut, it felt like I was gonna throw up. I exited the abandoned warehouse and walked around with my hood over my head, I kept my head low as I walked around the street, I took a deep shaky breath trying to hold back tears. I started to head back to my street where my house is, but suddenly rain starts pouring down and the sky went dark, as I got closer to my street I felt hands wrap around my eyes and mouth, then I started to feel drowsy and I realized the hand around my mouth held a scrap of fabric doused with chloroform, I started to panic so I lashed around trying to break free but soon I felt drowsy and passed out. When I woke up, I was in a dark room on the floor, my hands and feet were tied together with a thick itchy rope, digging into my skin. I wiggled my hands trying to loosen it but it stayed tight “Help!!” I shouted but I didn’t hear anyone “Help!!” I shouted again hoping for a reply, but it was only followed by silence.

Tap, tap, tap, I heard tapping coming down what I think are stairs, the light from the top of the stairs illuminated in front of me and shined ever so slightly on me, a tall slender figure stepped slowly down the stairs casting a shadow over me, their long arm reached to the wall and flipped a switch and a fluorescent light illuminated above me, I squinted from the bright light and waited for my eyes to adjust, after a minute or so my eyes adjusted and I could nearly see the tall figure. The figure walked into the light, it was a man, he had dirty blonde hair, and green eyes. “Well well well, isn’t it our murderer” he said while kneeling down in front of me “I’m not a murderer” I said gritting my teeth, “of course you are, you can’t trick me” they said while lifting my head upward so I made eye contact with him, I pulled my face away and snarled at him “wow, a fierce one you are” commented the man while standing back up, he raised his hand and put it below his chin, he paced around, then looked at me “so who else are you planning to kill” he asked “like I said, I’m not a murderer” I replied, he started to get on my nerves for not believing me. He looked at me again but he looked disappointed “so, we can do this the easy way or the hard way” he started “the easy was is you confess your crime and go to jail, the hard way is you don’t say anything and we force you to confess” I sighed leaned against the wall, I started to chuckle “what’s so funny?” He asked “well no one knows where I am, or even cares I exist, and people who did care are gone now” my chuckle transitioned into sobbing, tears fell down my face as I slid down the wall to lay on the floor, a puddle of tears grew under my head.

“Oh dear” he muttered “what am I gonna do with you” he put his hand to his head and rubbed it, I still laid on the floor and my tears stopped but the small puddle of tears remained. He walked over to me and pulled me up by the collar of my shirt “HEY” I shouted as he lifted me up then pushed me against the wall while releasing my shirt. My legs laid out in front of me, he kneeled down and started untying my ankles, once he was done he threw the scratchy brown rope to the side “Stand up” he said in a stern voice, I stood up and he grabbed my shoulder and turned me around, he started to untie my wrists “there” he said as he took the rope off my sore wrists.

I rubbed my wrists as a small red ring remained on them, I glared at the guy “woah” he exclaimed and took a step back, my clothes still wet from the rain, sticking to my skin, I walked past the man and out the exit, I bolted out the building to appear in a damp dark alleyway and it was night, I elbowed into the wall and pushed myself forward off the wall and ran forward into the street. I looked around and saw two bright yellowish white lights speedily getting closer, I reached my arms in front of my face and flinched back, I heard a loud honk and a screech of the tires, I lowered my arms and opened my eyes to see the dirty white car in front of me honking their horn. I trotted to the sidewalk and out of the road, this was an unfamiliar road as my eyes darted around but all I saw was a local drug store and a restaurant ‘dine in and out’ was in red fluorescent lights. I walked around town looking for anything familiar, then I saw it, the abandoned warehouse where I shot Jasmin, I started to feel sick and almost threw up, I entered the warehouse, it was still dark and silent. I went to the room that Jasmin was in, the heavy metal door creaked as I shoved it open, I look in and see the lifeless body laying in a puddle of blood, it was so dark the blood looked black, I walked into the silent room and looked around then I heard something, I don’t know what it was but I heard something my eyes darted around.

My eyes adjusted to the darkness and I found the source of the sound, it was a rat underneath the desk, it scurried to the door as my eyes followed it. My eyes started to water as I remembered what I did to Jasmin, I wiped my eyes and looked around for the gun, I sweeped my hands across the cold stone floor. My hand bumps into the cold gun and I wrap my hand around it, I pick it up away from the floor, my warm hands wrap around the cold trigger and muzzle of the gun. I looked for a gun holder in closet that I previously hid in, I couldn’t see what was in the closet because it was very dark so I reached in and glided my hands across the items wishing the closet until I came across a small fabric pouch, I grabbed it and took it out and slid the gun in, it fit like a glove, I clipped it onto my belt and left the premises. The sun started to rise from the horizon, as I walked around the corner of the building “if they think I’m a villain might as well be one” I muttered quietly to myself.

I walked the dark streets of the town as the light from the sunrise seeped through the cracks of the buildings and trees, the sun started to pull across the sky and lit up the town as I walked to the park. I came across a few people early in the morning, going for jogs and stuff like that. I walked over to the pond, free from ripples and untouched. I looked down into the water to find myself, dark bags underneath my eyes from lack of sleep, my eyes were also droopy and slightly sore as well. I splashed some water from the pond into my face and wiped it off, it felt very refreshing and cold, my slightly wet hair stuck to my forehead as I stood up and headed to a breakfast restaurant. I went to the door of the restaurant and slightly pushed it but it was locked, next to the door was a schedule of when it was open, I believe it was wednesday and it didn’t open until 7:00 AM, I had no idea what time it was because I lost my phone, I haven’t realized I lost it before and frantically checked all my pockets but no sign of it.

I went over to one of the few people awake. “Do you know what time it is?” I asked a runner. He stopped and took out his phone “it’s 6:53” he told me and then proceeded to jog around the park. I went back to the restaurant and sat down at a wooden bench, it was white but the paint started to peel to reveal tan wood, I started to doze off at the bench then I fell asleep, the sound of people walking by woke me up. I headed into the restaurant and ordered some pancakes, it was a couple minutes and the food still hadn't arrived and I could hear my stomach rumbling. Then the waiter came by my table and carefully set down the large plate with golden pancakes layered in thick brownish-gold syrup. I slid my fork and knife into the fluffy pancakes and cut them into small squares and started to eat them. They were so delicious I finished them very quickly, and the waiter came back to my table “so how was your meal?” She asked “it was really good” I answered “so how will you be paying? Cash or card?” She suggested “oh, umm” I stuttered, I bolted up from my seat and ran to the door “sorry, gotta dine n’ dash” I blurted as I ran out the door “HEY YOU GOT TO PAY FOR YOUR MEAL” the waitress shouted.

I ran out of the building, I didn't know where to go other than my home, I made my way around town toward my house, the sun was directly above the town now and I was almost at my house. My neighborhood started to come into view and I could see my house, and jacks house, but jacks house had the lights on and I saw someone inside, I ran to jacks house and saw Jack, he was fine “fucking asshole” I mumbled to myself “he faked his death and I got blamed for it” I thought. My face naturally went into a scowl. I went to the front door and raised my hand to knock on the door but I stopped myself. "Should I confront him?” I questioned myself in my head, suddenly I started to feel light headed and the world started to black out and I collapsed onto the door. Well that’s what I get for skipping sleep for a couple days. My body started to feel cold, numb, and stiff and I was nearly able to move. I sat in front of a small open closet but inside the closet was nothing but the abyss, I looked into the darkness wondering what was inside, then something bolted out of the darkness, a hand. The pitch dark hand came out and wrapped around my arm as I still couldn’t move, more hands bolted out of the abyss slowly suffocating me in the inky darkness, some wrapped around my mouth and I was unable to shout for help. I bolted up, a cold chill went down my spine and I was covered with a cold sweat, it was just a dream. I thought while relaxing, I looked around and I was on Jack's doorstep, the lights were off in his house. How long was I out for, I thought as I rubbed my head and sat down on the doorstep.

I felt marcid and drained, I stood up but my legs refused to hold me up, I’m way too exhausted to walk. I pulled myself up on his door and twisted the copper handle, I fell inward as the door swung open, I looked around for Jack but I realized the house was completely empty except for me. I pulled myself up on the dining table and I heard the wooden floor creak ever so slightly, I could barely stand let alone walk, my eyes were so tired they could barely stay open and my eyes were burning and started to tear up and I could barely see. I patted down the walls in search of a light switch, then I heard a click and the lights flashed on, I rubbed my sore eyes until they cleared “Jake?” I questioned as it echoed through the empty house “Jake?” I said again but slightly louder, I stumbled around the house in search of him but had no luck. I collapsed back onto the untouched couch and put my palm to my head and groaned in pain, I think I was having a migraine but I don’t know because I never had one before, I slumped across the couch a and laid across it, I was extremely tired and I think I fell asleep for who knows how long, but when I woke up it was dark.

When I got up I was sore, like really sore, I walked out the door that I forgot to close, when I got outside it wasn’t cold or hot, it was kind of humid out but I proceeded to go back to my house, I could nearly walk on account of how tired I was, i stumbled my way back to my house down the street, i almost toppled over a couple times but managed to keep steady. But then everything went dark, and a high-pitched ringing was in my ears, and I felt myself hit the ground hard, then I heard a faint siren and red and blue lights. My eyelids were too heavy to keep open so I shut them. It's been awhile and i was still unconscious but I could hear everything that was happening, I heard people talking to one another on radios, with a static sound when they finished their conversions, I heard a heart monitor, beeping every so often. Where it smelled weird but good, like medicine and sanitizer. I opened my eyes and took a quick look around was wearing a strange thing blue gown, and there were two nurses beside me holding a clipboard with a paper on it and talking to each other, then one of them pointed back to me without turning around “this patient was found a couple nights ago passed out on the sidewalk, they didn't have any licenses on them when we found them, but they did have a gun. When we found them passed out we did a drug test to see if they were drunk, but they were clean. Were not sure the reason for the pass out” she continued to talk and talk about me, and if i was ok, then they started to turn around and i quickly closed my eyes to pretend I was still passed out, my heart started to pound faster with fear, the heart monitor started to beep faster which made my anxiety spike and my heart beat even faster, the two nurses rushed around my bed to check on the monitor, one tapped the glass and i tried to slow down my heart rate, very quickly it went back to normal “must have been a malfunction” one of the nurses said “yeah probably” agreed the other nurse, they walked back around the bed and left the room.

Soon later the lights in my room turned off and the hallway lights dimmed, a pale yellow fluorescent color. I waited a bit to make sure no one was in the hallway so I could make my escape. I sat up slowly and craned my head to the door then to my arm, it had four different needles in it, fastened on with a fabric like tape, all of them were attached to different thin tubes, i peeled the tape off and pulled out the needles one by one, it stung a little bit but once they were out, small drops of blood started to form at the hole in my skin where the needles once pierced, i wiped the blood away and stood up out of the bed, i felt dizzy and i had to grab the metal bar on the side of the bed for support, my head started to spin and i almost passed out, i felt winded and exhausted “how long was i out” i muttered to myself not expecting a response “you've been out for a couple days” said a soft calm voice from behind me, it was an young girl, it looks like she got her left forearm amputated, i nodded and stumbled my way out of the dark room and clung to the wall so i wouldn't collapse to the ground, the hospital seemed empty, no nurses in the hallways, or patients. My head slowly started to stop spinning and I could walk without the wall. I tried to be as quiet as possible so no one would know I was leaving. Soon after I got to the door and left, I had no idea where I was, who knows how far away I am from my house, how I would get home, I have no money, no friends, or family. “I'm a murderer” i whispered to myself, i sat down on the cold pavement, the sun has been down for a while, the cold wind bit at my skin through the cheap gown, i curled up and dug my face into my knees to hide the tears “what will i do now” i said while tearchoked “what do i do, i have nothing, i killed people, and for what” i could feel my eyes starting to burn as more tears flooded down my face and as i started to hyperventilate.

I felt a warm hand lay on my shoulder, i got startled and jerked away, i could barely see them through the tears, my shaky breath started to calm, and my tears started to stop “c’mon lets get you back inside” said the person, it was a female voice, it must have been one of the nurses that were in my room, she grabbed my hand and pulled me up. I wiped my tears from my eyes, then wiped my wet hand onto the gown and it left a salty tear stain, she lightly pulled my hand wanting me to follow her so i did, we went back through the sliding doors at the front and passed the main desk, there was still no one there, probably out for lunch or changing shifts. My tears fully stopped but my eyes still burned. She brought me back to the room i was in before with the girl, The nurse hooked up the the needles and tubes back into my arm where a red crusting smudge mark lay, a bubble emerged from the semi-clear bag attached to a tube that attaches to my arm “hmm” i hummed as i looked at the bag. “Whatcha thinkin bout” the nurse asked “what” i said because i was not paying attention to her “what-” “oh me” i said before she asked me again “just thinking” i fully answered, “about what exactly” she asked as she sat down at the foot of the bed “nothing important” i lied and looked in the other direction away from her but she was still in my peripheral vision, i could see she was worried about me, she stood up and the bed creaked ever so slightly without turning around. I watched her as she flipped the lights of and turned left down the dim lit hallway, soon the clock in front of me that was hanging on the wall turned its hands to 11 pm, it was starting to get late, when can i go home r if i ever go home, i began to get even more worried, my breaths became shallow and my eyes jumped around the room looking for an object that doesn’t exist, my heart beat slightly faster and my breaths got shallower and shallower to the point i couldn't breathe, my heart beat faster and faster, the beeping from the machine sped up, ‘what was happening’ i yelled to myself in my head, i couldn't speak, my throat became dry and scratchy from the breathing soon becoming raspy. The two nurses busted through the door in a rush to get to me but then everything faded to black, I heard yelling, and alarms, and people barking orders to one another ‘was I dead’ I thought to myself, I don't feel my heartbeat, i am calm, finally at peace. Then a flash of light blinded my eyes, soon later adjusted back to the hospital room as i bolted up from the bed, a cold sweat running down my back, “thank god, just a nightmare” i muttered as i wiped the sweat off my face and lay back down ‘but what if… nah it's stupid’ i thought ‘but what if it wasn't a dream, and i could have died’ i lay there staring at the off white ceiling… thinking.

The next day the nurses came in with my clothes “you are free to go” one of them spoke while the other came over and detached the needles and tubes from my arm, the other nurse put the neatly folded clothes at the middle of the bed near the edge “you can change, then sign the paperwork” she set down a clipboard with a piece of paper on it with a pen on top of the folded clothes “and then you're free to go” she finished, they both left the room and shut the door “it's nice you're getting out early” the voice startled me then i remembered the the girl next to me was there, her grayish maroon curtain made a wall around her bed, i stood up and started to get my clothes on, they smelled clean without a particular sent, but they also felt clean, they felt nice, still warm from the dryer. I sat on the edge of the bed and pulled over the clipboard but as ii did the pen fell on the ground with a light click and rolled partially under the bed, i bent down while still sitting on the bed reaching under the bed for the pen, but then i felt something it didn't feel like the pen, it felt like wood, i grabbed the wood object and pulled it out, it was a small antique wooden box. i held it in front of me on my lap and observed it, it was a mostly gray box but still had tints of brown from the aged wood, i turned the box around and found a tiny flip lock keeping it closed, i wedged my finger under the thin piece of metal trying to open it, whoever put it here must have put this here a long time ago, then my finger with a lot of force slammed the small lock onto the top piece of the box. I opened the box, it had a small note on it, the outside of it written on it said ‘for my love’, i folded the note open, it was frail and old, it was crumpled and ripped but was filled with love ‘dear my love, by the time you find this it will be too late, and i would have disappeared forever, it's not you it’s me, i've done many wrong things i'm not proud about, i hope you will still love me, because i still love you. Someday I hope we will find eachother again whether the earth crumbles or we bump into each other at the mall. I sure hope you can understand I will never stop loving you. Your dearest, jasmin’ tears swelled up in my eyes, jasmin can never find the one she loves ever again because of me, it's all my fault, my throat swelled and i began to choke on my tears, he will never know that she loved him. I signed the paperwork and grabbed the box then left. I sat at the empty bus stop waiting for the bus to arrive, tears still streamed down my face as the bus arrived, I wiped the tears and sniffled a bit, the doors of the bus swung open waning me to step inside. ‘Maybe I can start anew, be a different person, live a better life’ I thought, but then I realized that won't stop me from being a wanted criminal, that won't bring Jack back, it won't solve anything.

I sulked on the busses itchy fabric seat, alone, no one here but me and the driver, but it was nice to look out the window and look at all the good things in life, but maybe, just maybe i could be a new person, but i also didn't want to change i liked being wanted, you don't have to listen to anyone, you can just be free, but it fills me with dread when i think about the people i hurt like jasmin, but thinking about jack makes my stomach tie into a knot and i feel like i need to throw up, i remember his lifeless body draped across the floor as a bed of blood lies beneath him, and the knife, brutally stabbed into the floor. I wish that it never happened, i wish that jack never died so i wouldnt be a murderer, a fucking wanted criminal. This was the worst couple weeks of my life, everyone who cares about me is fucking dead, i wish i never existed. I stood up and pressed the button to let me off the bus and the bus halted to a stop, it was near the cliff of the town, the most popular attraction to go to, its where our founder founded the town, no one really visits it anymore, it's become gray, dull, and depressing, i walked for a couple minutes to get to the cliff, i stood atop and placed the wooden box beneath a nearby tree, the town draped across the valley like a pond “i can't do this anymore” i whispered to myself “I CAN’T FUCKING DO THIS ANY MORE” i shouted, i stepped closer to the edge, single tear fell from my eye, my stomach tied into a knot, i looked across the town one last time, gazing as the sun set, pulling the dark night sky over the town. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, i stretched out my foot over the cliff side “at least i saw the sunset one last time” i said to the darkness, i leaned forward over the cliff, waiting to fall, but then i felt two tender hands grasping the back of my shirt, and pulled me away from the cliff, i was choking on my tears “just let me do this” i push them away and i walk back to the edge, they wrap their arms tightly around me, and i kneel to the ground and they follow “please don't do this, you don't deserve it” they told me “NO I DO DESERVE IT” i yelled at them trying to squirm my way out of the hug but they only tightened their grip, i felt tears drip through the back of my shirt, they were crying, i stopped trying to get out and just accepted the hug. I started to cry more, i haven't had any love in so long i forgot what it feels like to receive it “th-than-nk y-y-you” i said tearchoked, “t-th-thank you” i muttered quieter to them. I started to quietly laugh, oh boy how i missed this, how i missed affection, i never want this to stop “i never want this to stop, i wanna stay like this forever” i croakaly said “dont worry im not going anywhere” said the voice calmly “its ok” they reassured me, i turned around and hugged them back, i never wanted to let go. They hugged me and i hugged them for awhile, this is the best i have felt in years, i wiped the tears from my eyes but they just kept coming, after my tears started to clear up i got a clear view of the persons face, it was the bus driver, they saw what i was gonna do, and they cared enough for a stranger to save their life, i have never met anyone like this… except jack, he would always care for others, and always helped people, the busdriver loosened their hug but i kept mine tight and firm “thank you jack” i whispered, i don't think the driver minded that i called them jack, just as long as i was safe “thank you” i said one final time.

love it but my my English teacher is crying rn/j. The dead body descriptions remind me of the book “the book thief” for some reason.

(ooc)