#he just has a secret one that he plays when he can
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ienjoywritingfilth · 1 day ago
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a sinner i am part vii
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trope: Boyfriend's Dad PP character: Joel Miller x f reader this chapter summary: you don't keep your promise and Joel isn't happy about it. warning: dirty talk, public sex,joel's a dirty old man, cheating on your bf (but it’s cool, cuz its with Joel and everything is fictional in this universe), alternative universe b/c daddy miller stays alive and hates golfand he has a son named Shawn, no Sarah. words 4.2k rating: E author: these reviews and stuff are so cool thank u and if i get lots of reviews and stuff i will keep adding faster and i will keep their naughty lil secret going back home. because i love them sooooooooo much xoxoxoxoxoxoox taglist: @lady-viscera | @cjdign | @fuckthatbazinga | @liciafonseca | @stevie75 | @joelalorian | @oldenoughtoknowbettersstuff | @akah565 | @dontknow446 | @pedritosgfreal | @yesjazzywazzylove-blog | @untamedheart81 | @ashleyfilm | @sptbear | @elegantduckturtle | @noneofmyshipsarereal | @blahkateisdone | @wintersquirrel | @shivkillian | @auteurdelabre | @sheepdogchick3 | @moel-jiller | @cuteanimalmama | @gossipgirl-03 | @cowboymarcs | @tahi2006 | @guelyury | @churchofjoemiller | @r3dheadedwitch | @tutarrads | @galway-girlatwork | @supertoga | @ghostofzion | @casssiopeia | @tateypots | @yxtkiwiyxt | @regalwhovianbrowncoat774 | @pastelpinkflowerlife | @inept-the-magnificent | @auteurdelabre | @meleekabenjamin | @stevie75 | @animejunki5 | @zooty-and-fruity | @drunk-and-capable | @lunpycatavenue | @joelssluttyknee | @getitoutofmymindwrites | @swankyorange | @joeldidnothingwrong | @thischarmingmandalorian | @604to647 | @pedr0swh0r3 | @annieispunk | @doblasftcisco | @ilmattmurdocksthighs | @bunnybeheaded | @swaggydogsblog | @untamedheart81 | @watermelonslut | @loudtimetraveljellyfish |
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part vii: breaking your promise
"I swear to you I won't stop until your legs are shaking and the neighbors know my name." — Horace Cope
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You glance at the bathroom door, knowing that Joel is across that room. You're still sore from yesterday and on your shoulder blade is a scratch from the rock walls of the cave. You had to lie to Shawn and tell him it was from sharp coral during snorkelling. 
You look at his naked back as he breathes softly. The sun shines outside the window promising another perfect Hawaiian day, one final day in paradise. Shawn's phone goes off with an alert you know too well. His bros are texting him about some online game they're all playing. Hours of Shawn's free time are spent on video games with his friends. He stretches awake, reaching clumsily for his phone before turning to face you. 
"Good morning," he says in a scratchy morning voice. He scans his phone before typing something back. When he’s done he drops his phone onto the bed before shuffling towards you, planting his mouth at your jaw. 
"You look good this morning," he says against your neck, kissing there. You hold back a frown as his morning breath reaches you. His hips start to move against yours and you feel his cock already half hard when he reaches for your breasts. 
"Not right now," you say moving out of his touch. "I don't really feel up to it."
"But I'm so hard babe," Shawn says pawing your breast through your flimsy negligee. "And we leave tomorrow. I wanna get in all the vacation sex we can."
He says all of this with a playful look in his eyes but the tension is there, his hand still kneading your breast through your shirt. You made a promise to Joel and it's one you intend to keep.
This is my cunt to fuck. My mouth to cum in. 
You look back at Shawn with a pout and your hands resting over your belly. 
"I think I ate something bad," you say with a frown. "Sorry babe."
"Oh shit really?" Shawn pulls back with a grimace before shrugging. Then he turns on a smile. "Whatever. Let's go for a hike. Just the two of us." 
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Joel wakes up with Tess in his arms snoring soundly. He blinks the sleep away and stares at her face taking in the lines around her eyes and the freckles along her cheeks. Even in sleep she's a beautiful woman. She herself was forbidden fruit at one time, a woman Tommy told him to stay away from one rainy afternoon when he saw the way Joel watched Tess' tight ass move in her pants as she left the office. 
"Christ Joel keep it in your pants. She's good at what she does and I don't wanna lose her because you need to get your dick wet." 
Joel sighs heavily and thinks about his relationship. He feels like things have gotten stagnant or is it that with you things are so much more exciting? He can't decide and he doesn't want to give up either. 
He glances at the bathroom door knowing that you lay beyond it. He can picture you there in the bed he had you on. You crying out for him as he went down on you, making you cum so hard you gushed over his tongue. 
He still can't believe yesterday and the cave. You were feral and yet so sweet wrapped around his cock. He had a hard time recalling the details of it all because you'd both been so frantic. The ride home was silent and you avoided each other the rest of the night. It's quiet from your room and he wonders if you're still sleeping. If his son wasn't home he'd crawl into bed with you and play with your pussy until you woke up dripping for him. A glance at Joel's phone tells him he missed a text. It's from Shawn from a few hours ago.  
Going up to Mauna Kea. Be back by ten. 
Joel sees that it's almost ten. It's the last day of vacation and he wants to do something memorable. Maybe a luau? It's cliché but seems fun and something you’d enjoy. He scrolls his phone until he finds one for this evening and books it for the four of you. He wonders what you'll wear. 
Tess stirs next to him and Joel feels his cock swelling. It's not like you're here and he really needs to let out some tension before you get back. Because you were serious when you said you didn't want to keep doing this to Shawn and Joel knows he should feel more shame than he does.  
I just need to fuck it out of my system. If I'm drained I won't be so pent up. 
He twists to face Tess, pressing on her hip in response hand thighs part with sleepy lack of coordination. He moves his fingers over her cunt and she lifts her hips to chase the feeling. She coos his name softly as she wakes up all fluttering lashes and soft sighing. Joel shoves down his boxers before tugging at her panties. She lifts her hips so that he can remove them easier. 
"I need to make you cum, honey," Joel says as he props his cock at her entrance. "You gonna let me?" 
Tess just nods with a sleepy smile and widens her thighs. He gives her a gentle kiss before feeding his cock into her. He fucks her soft and slow, stretching her around him listening to her coming apart beneath him. He's only listening because his eyes are closed and it's not her cunt he feels but yours. This is you he's fucking at his leisure in his bed. Your whimpers and whines as he splits you open with his cock. 
"Biggest you've ever had," he murmurs, hips snapping faster and faster. "Barely fits."
You exist there behind his eyelids, eyes rolled back, tongue out, brows crossed as you beg for more. 
More daddy please.... I need it.. I need it
"You need it?" Joel grunts, fucking Tess so hard the bed is creaking. "Tell me how much."
"So much," a voice replies, not yours but Tess'. "So much Joel, please!" 
He's already over the edge at the memory of your tits bouncing and he's about to cum when the sound of the door being thrust open is heard and Shawn's shout startles him. 
"Dad! Tess!"
The two of them stop immediately, eyes wide. They exchange sheepish glances as Joel pulls out of Tess. They throw on clothes and stumble out, concerned. Shawn is standing there with you at his side. Shawn is flushed and beaming, holding you around the waist. As soon as Joel and Tess draw over he takes your left hand and holds it proudly out to them.
"We're engaged!" 
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He did it on top of Mauna Kea during the hike. You were sweaty and surprised and when he got down on one knee and pulled out the ring he'd been keeping secret for the week you could only feel a panic swirl in your belly. 
"I wanted Tess' help planning a proposal," Shawn says now as the four of you sit around the breakfast table talking about it. "She's the one that found the hike her first day here."
"I'm glad I could be a part of it."
You make yourself smile at Tess and pick at your fruit bowl. You're pretty sure she and Joel were fucking when you came home this morning and the thought infuriates you. 
“So Tess knew about it,” Joel says, hurt that his son didn’t share this with him. Shawn gives his dad a sad look.
“I’m sorry pops, I just know how bad you are at keeping secrets.”
You choke on your water pretending that it went down the wrong tube. Joel hunches over his meal just nodding. You're sitting next across from him and he's trying so hard not to focus on the shirt that clings to you. It reminds him of the day he'd been so eager to ride with in the ATV. The day Joel came just thinking about fucking you. And now he's had you and he still craves so much more. But he needs to focus on this monumental event for his son. His only child, the man who will one day take over the company. There's a mixture of pride and revulsion in him. 
"Congratulations you two. Let's celebrate." 
He orders mimosas for the table, speaking gently about how proud he is of Shawn and happy for the future. How can he say all these things when he was balls deep in you yesterday? He's trying to catch your eye but you refuse to look at him. 
"I thought we could do a luau tonight to celebrate your engagement," Joel says, irritated when you still won't look his way. 
"Thanks Dad."
"That sounds so nice Joel" Tess says squeezing his forearm. 
You throw back the rest of your mimosa with a scowl. Your mouth tastes sour and you frown watching Tess touch Joel. You shouldn't feel possessive as you sit here wearing another man's ring but you do. But this is all for the best because now you have to stop whatever all this is with Joel. 
"Thanks Dad," Shawn says as he slings his arm around you. "Me and the future Mrs Miller appreciate it."
Joel watches you tense up before excusing yourself saying you have to use the washroom. Joel watches your perky ass swish away from the table and he bites back a groan. Shawn waits until you're out of earshot before looking back over at Joel and Tess. 
"I'm surprising her with a couple's massage in the room. Do you mind giving us the place for a couple hours?"
"Of course," Tess says before Joel can talk. He feels frantic about everything and worried for some reason he cannot explain. 
"But it's our last day together, son. I thought we'd spend it hanging all four of us." 
"Oh leave them alone," Tess says with a playful slap. "They're newly engaged! They want some time to themselves. They don't wanna hang around us old folks."
You arrive back at the table just after Tess confirms she and Joel will hang out by the pool for a couple hours. 
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"I just think it's presumptuous kicking me outta the fucking place I paid for," Joel grumbles a while later at the pool. 
"You only get engaged once, Texas," Tess tells him over her magazine. "Besides the cabana is private. Maybe we can finish what we started this morning?" 
Joel is too distracted to enjoy the thought of fucking Tess in the quasi private cabana. Normally the thrill would be enough to get him hard but right now he's fixated on what's happening with you two in the room. 
"I forgot something in the room," Joel says standing and looking down at her soaking up the sun. "I'll be right back."
Joel jogs the entire way back to the private suite with his dark eyes stuck on the door. Joel enters into the space to see you and Shawn tangled up on the couch, pulling away quickly when you hear his footsteps. 
"Dad," Shawn says in irritation, tugging up his jeans that were halfway down.
 Joel takes this in, clenching his jaw. "I thought you two were gettin a massage."
"We are," Shawn says harshly "they'll be here in twenty." 
Joel can see the way you're both panting. Your hair is mussed and your lips are swollen from kissing. 
"Well I'm sorry I just forgot my wallet," Joel mutters. "I'll grab it and get outta your hair lickity split." He grimaces and walks into his bedroom. He locates the wallet quickly but pauses, overhearing you and Shawn on the couch. 
"He'll be gone in a sec."
"I feel like the mood is killed." 
"It's not." 
Joel winces at the whiny edge to his son's voice. 
"I can get you moaning again real quick." Joel hears the sofa dip. "We can finish what we started if you wanna be my good girl."
"Shawn he's in the next room." 
"I'm just kissing you, babe," Shawn says and Joel can hear the wet sounds. "Don't you wanna be my good girl?'" 
Joel hears your pause and then. "Yes." 
"Then let's finish this in the bedroom when he leaves."
Joel sees red. He was very clear in his instructions very sincere in his request. And now you're gonna take Shawn's cock the second he leaves. And the worst part is he can’t stop it.
"Got it," Joel says bursting into the room holding up his wallet. You sit apart from Shawn on the couch looking guilty. Joel's eyes scan your rumpled dress. 
“Bye dad,” Shawn says with an arm throwing itself around your waist to drag you into his lap.
Joel watches a moment longer before he walks out the door and closes it, his chest tightening in anger. He stops outside the front door and he should leave but he doesn't. Instead he walks the perimeter of the villa until he finds the open window of your bedroom. He crouches down under the window, listening to hear you and Shawn speaking. You sound exhausted. 
"Shawn I'm tired."
"It's our last day in Hawaii and we're engaged," Shawn insists. "All you have to do is lay back." 
Joel can hear the sigh you heave before the creak of the mattress indicates you've gotten into bed. 
"That's right babe," Shawn groans. "Show me that pretty pussy."
Joel's hand is clenched so hard it's burning. He closes his eyes when a rhythmic slapping noise begins. 
"You take me well," Shawn gasps out. "Such a good girl."
You whine his name over and over until Joel can't hear anymore. He's so furious he thinks he might put his fist through the window. Instead he makes himself walk back to the pool where Tess waits for him. 
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You stand in front of the mirror later that night, smoothing your tropical patterned dress and frowning. You look good but you feel terrible. Fucking Shawn this afternoon felt weird, being engaged feels weird, wanting Joel feels weird. Everything just feels weird.
When the four of you get into the luau and take to your table you end up seated beside Joel. His eyes are scanning your body, itching to touch you. He allows his legs to widen under the table, irritated when you pull your legs tighter together to avoid touching. You're engaged now, you tell yourself as you shrink away from him. 
The group's watch the entertainment, eating from the delicious buffet and cheering at the hula dancers. The drinks are bottomless and after a few you need to use the restroom. You excuse yourself, still ignoring Joel's hard gaze. When inside you splash cold water on your face cooling down your cheeks. You stare at yourself in the mirror and frown. 
"Are you okay?"
You look over to see an older woman staring at you with concern, washing her hands. 
"I just got engaged today." You give her a weak smile. 
The woman pats her red hair with a palm and gives you an eye up and down. "Sweetheart if that's your reaction to getting engaged, I think maybe it's time to dump the guy. Just my two cents." 
"I'm just overwhelmed," you say quickly feeling guilty. "He's wonderful."
The woman touches you on the shoulder. "Trust me. This isn't how you should feel the day you get engaged." 
She walks out of the door and you go back to staring at yourself in the mirror. You don't look like a happy fiancée. You look terrified! But you don't know how much of that is the engagement and how much is guilt over fucking Shawn's dad. You open the door to head back and look in surprise at the tall figure who stands there, blocking your exit. 
"Joel?"
"We need to talk," Joel mutters before pushing you back into the restroom by the shoulder. He scans to see it empty before locking the door. Then he advances on you, taking wide strides until your back is up against the sink basin on the counter. His hips are against yours pinning you there. 
"He make you cum this morning?"
You blink up at him in surprise before you shake your head. He lets out a groan that morphs into a growl.
"Fucking shameful," he tells you, his large hands coming to slide up your waist, palms cupping your breasts through your dress. "I'd have you cumming on my tongue every hour of the day."
You take his hands and you gently move them from your body. "Joel stop. We can't do this anymore."
"I know," Joel says even though he's half hard just looking at you.
You don't say anything; you just look at the floor with red cheeks.
"I heard you with him earlier." Joel feels his face grow warm when you frown. "I told you not to fuck him," Joel growls as he lowers his face to yours. "Told you this cunt and this mouth were mine." 
You glare up at him in frustration, eyes narrowing in anger. You didn't want to fuck Shawn! He hovers over you like a beautifully terrifying statue. Your pussy throbs just inhaling the cologne he dabbed on before you all left. He's so hot right now in his vacation shirt and wavy locks. But he's your fiance's dad and if he's not strong enough to stop this madness you'll have to be.
"He's my fiancé, Joel. What was I supposed to do?"
"Supposed to listen to me."
You cross your arms in front of you and give him a stare that makes his stomach drop. "Why would I do that? We're not together."
Joel rears back slightly at this before his eyes turn into malevolent slits. "I guess fair is fair. I was balls deep in Tess when you came in with your announcement."
You raise your head defiantly staring him down.
"Bet you were thinking about me the whole time."
The silence in the bathroom is deafening for a moment. Joel just stares at you while you blush further. You can't believe you actually said that to him. He leans in and puts both hands on the counter behind you, keeping you trapped between his muscular arms.
"I heard him calling you his good girl. But you're not a good girl are you? Not when you take my cock one day and his the next," Joel spits. "What do you think that makes you?" 
Your face goes red with embarrassment and your whole body goes up in flames at the judgment in his deep voice. 
"I think it makes you a whore," Joel hisses. "A filthy little slut." 
You bring up your hand and slap him without thought at those ugly words and the crack of skin on skin echoes in the empty restroom. You breathe heavily, glaring at him as his head snaps to the side. You don't notice that he immediately grows hard but you do see his nostrils flare as he looks back at you. Your eyes go wide like a frightened animal when you see his dark eyes grow darker. 
"I'm sorry, Joel." 
Joel grunts sharply before he backs you against the counter again and reaches under your dress. He cups you there, feeling you're wet already through he fabric of your thong. He stares down at you and sees the flush along your cheeks. Your big eyes blink up at him, pupils like saucers. He spins you around to face the mirror as you try to wrest away from him. 
"What the fuck are you doing?" You whisper urgently as his belt buckle and zipper undo behind you. There's the crinkle of a condom wrapper and then his mouth at your ear. 
"I'm teaching you a lesson." 
He doesn't wait for you to reply he just tugs your thong to the side and plunges his cock into you. You let out a yip of surprise but Joel quickly covers your mouth with one huge hand. 
"They're right out there," Joel whispers against your earlobe, his mouth pressed to the gold earring you wear. "You gotta be a good girl and keep quiet. Don't want Shawn to know you're in here taking his daddy's cock do you?"
He pushes your dress up, exposing your bare ass and cunt. He groans as he withdraws slowly to see the shiny slick of you coating him before thrusting all the way to the base over and over again. His eyes go to the mirror above the sink to see your eyes are already rolling back, back arching for him. 
"Look how much you love being full of my cock."
Your eyebrows knit as he hits that sweet spot inside, too aroused to even open your eyes to watch him sink into you from behind.You clutch at the counter not caring if you're seen or heard. All you can do is chase this blissful feeling. But Joel keeps one hand over your mouth, sealing in your moans. 
"Shouldn't be doing this, should we sweet thing?" Joel croons as he pounds into you, making your fingers curl around the sink basin. "Shouldn't be fucking this tight little cunt when they wait at the table." He watches your ass bounce against his hips, the recoil making him moan against his sealed lips. "You gonna stop me?" 
You can't answer other than to whine against his palm.  He holds you by the throat, forcing your face to tilt up so you can see your expression. You're completely blissed out with pink cheeks and your mascara smeared. You look ruined and behind you is the strong form of Joel, dwarfing you as he fucks into you. 
"Naw you're not gonna stop me," he grins wolfishly. "You want it just as much as I do." 
Now he uncovers your mouth as your hips roll along with his. You look at yourself in the mirror again, watching as Joel fucks you like an animal from behind his fingers sliding over your hip and between your thighs. You gasp, looking behind to watch him fuck into you, watching the recoil of your plump ass as he stares. 
"We can't keep doing this,” you croak, “we can't." 
Joel sees how you're fighting so hard not to want him but your body keeps backing up to fuck yourself on his slick pole as he tickles your clit.  
"Our little secret just a little while longer," he tells your reflection quietly. He grunts and groans quietly as he fucks your tight hole, his hands bruising your hips as he holds you in place.
"He make you feel this good?" Joel whispers, eyes stuck on your open mouth as you hold back a cry. “He make your cunt drool like I do?”
"No," you say in tiny gasps at the filth he’s spewing. "No. Never." 
Joel feels his cock being strangled by your cunt and now he begins to pound into you, watching the reflection the entire time. His face is red and his teeth are bared. You look like you’re on another planet, whining quietly as you take him. 
"He make you cum most of the time?"
He knows the answer but he still sneers when you shake your head. He lets out a groan that morphs into a growl.
"Fucking shameful," he tells your reflection. "I'd have you cumming on my tongue every hour of the day."
He holds onto your left shoulder, helping his momentum as he thrusts in and out. You moan his name quietly, imagining being in his bed, thighs spread as he devours your cunt. He moves his thumb into your mouth. "Suck." His eyes fix on the mirror as he fucks one hole with his cock and fills the other with his wide thumb. Your cheeks hollow as you suck his thumb. 
"Just my little fuck toy aren't ya," he grins at your reflection. You moan around his finger, nodding and cock-drunk. He takes his hand from your clit but you don't complain, you just keep sucking. 
You'll do whatever he asks of you if he fucks you well enough and the both of you know it. He feels you start to clench around the head of his cock and he slowly stops. Your eyes snap open and meet his in the mirror as you pant, whining his name. He looks totally wrecked with a flushed face and mussed hair.
"You don't get to cum," he says against your temple as he begins to thrust shallowly again. "Only daddy cums tonight. And only I cum in this cunt from now on, you understand?"
"Yes," you say panting heavily as he saws in and out of you. "Yes, I understand."
"Repeat it."
"Only you fuck this pussy," you say in a slur with your entire body jigging as Joel holds you by the hips and doesn't hold back. 
"Say it like you mean it," he grunts as he feels his balls contract. "Look at that little slut in the mirror and tell her."
You hear how wet you are with each slap of his thighs against the meat of your ass before Joel presses your spine, causing your ass to rise for him as your chest hits the cool counter. He slips between your folds faster and faster as you jerk against him. For a moment you forget what he asked you to do until he prompts you with a low growl.
"I said, what are you?"
"A little slut," you whimper. Joel feels a shudder go through his spine at your easy submission. You watch him curve his face over your shoulder to speak against your cheek. 
"And what does Daddy's slut need to remember?" 
You look at the reflection staring back at you, one breast spilling out of your dress, the skirt hiked up, your ass bouncing each time Joel thrusts up into your waiting cunt. His wide hand goes to cup your exposed breast as he watches your back arch. He rolls the nipple between his fingers.
"Only daddy cums in this cunt from now on," you tell your desperate reflection. 
"And who owns this pussy I’m fucking?" Joel asks you,
"You do," you gasp as his movements grows staggered and forceful. "Daddy owns my cunt." 
Joel cums hard, so hard he's convinced the condom can't hold it all. He groans fuck fuck fuck against your cheek with his eyes closed. 
"Such a tight fucking pussy for Daddy to cum in. Such a good girl for taking me like that," he says before he places a kiss to your cheekbone. He looks at your red face and the heavy lidded way you stare at him. He kisses the damp hair at your temples. You smile and he returns it. 
"I'll see you back at the table." 
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what did you thin of this chapter? next up mile high club anyone????? or do you have scenarios you rlly wanna see with them?plsssssss write some good long comments for me or i won't be motivated okayyy i luv uuuuuuuuuuuuuu
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vigilskeep · 3 days ago
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Do you think maybe Villa Dellamorte has one of those massive pantries/root cellars and that that's where Lucanis used to hide away as a child? Tucked in somewhere dark and cool, reading his wyvern books by lamplight, the cooks and sculleries checking in on him and keeping him secret from Caterina? Maybe he found a blanket someone "accidentally" left there, or a small cushion, and never questioned the little basket of snacks that found its way into his nook.
i’d believe it! it definitely seems like the kitchens were a safe place for him and that’s one of the reasons he has such positive associations with cooking and being around the food. when the crossroads magically smell like home and comfort: “coffee. like illario and i smelled in the kitchen where we grew up.” and from banter with emmrich; “i used to help the kitchen staff in the villa when i was a boy. it gave me something to do between lessons with caterina.” “so it’s not a crow skill for hiding poisons in food.” “it’s good for that, too. but mostly i just wanted to know how to make churros.” something he was allowed to do just out of interest, that can even be passed off as useful for his training. remembered kindnesses from the staff would mesh well with how much compassion he has for the household slaves in the wigmaker job. i can see them letting him hide away in the pantry like you say and pretending he’s sooo good at assassinning that they couldn’t possibly notice
less directly connected to his pantry-based living habits, but i also think we have a canon version of something like what you describe that he kept completely to himself: the secret “escape route” you take into the villa dellamorte, about which he says “illario doesn’t know it’s here. caterina didn’t even tell me about it. i found it playing here alone as a boy.” and it’s a sort of cave-like passageway under the house. you KNOW that was his little wyvern lair and that he really loved it if he didn’t even share with illario
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marvelwitchergilmore · 2 days ago
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Secret Kindness
Summary: Joel Miller x Fe!Reader -> It's no secret Joel Miller could be an asshole, but it was a secret that that wasn't all he could be.
Disclaimer: I haven't finished my re-watch but I wanted to write something for him. Kinda friends to lovers, oblivious idiots in love, descriptions of scars, bruises, cleaning wounds, kinda a 'who did this to you?' trope. Swearing, light spoilers for Field of Dreams? Fluff. Not Proof Read.
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It was no secret that Joel Miller could be an asshole. 
From the unspoken stories from his brother, to his treatment of people in general; untrusting, strong dislike, to simply his responses when talking to people. Mostly it was in grunts or short sentences. 
Except, for some reason nobody else could see that Joel wasn’t just an asshole. He could be kind, funny, and deeply caring. That was something you had known from the minute you’d seen him. 
Having arrived in Jackson a month or so after the winter, you had heard stories about Tommy Miller’s brother Joel. Most people called him an ass – never truly giving a reason why. But when he walked back into town with who you presumed to be his daughter with him, you saw there and then a side to Joel Miller that nobody cared to mention. 
How he constantly looked around for the girl, watched her every move in fear she might get hurt. How his hand came to her shoulders, leading her away from looking at the group of people staring at them and towards the bar where Tommy had just walked out from. 
And over the following weeks, you saw small parts of Joel that you felt nobody else had even cared to see. He helped Tommy where he could, and helped others where they’d let him. A couple of times you’d see Ellie – having met her briefly one afternoon when she was sat with Tommy as he tried to fix a toaster – struggling with her homework, only to turn to the one man who a lot of people were afraid of in town. With a calm nod, he’d walk over and help her. 
Then you finally met him. 
Usually, you were on patrol in the afternoons, taking over after Joel’s detail. Except, with one of theirs getting sick, you offered to cover. The other’s didn’t want to pair off with Joel because of their preconceived notions of him, or were more than eager to do so, which made Joel slightly uncomfortable. 
So, when you called out to be paired with him, he agreed. Though, neither of you missed the looks two of the women in the team gave you as you walked past them and followed Joel. 
That was the day you became friends with Joel. 
“You know, if it makes you that uncomfortable, I can make a swap with one of them. Just because the world went to shit doesn’t mean someone should feel like it.”
Joel thanked you and, although he never gave an actual answer to your offer, part of him was pleased to see you in detail regularly. 
Over the following weeks, you got to know more about him. About Ellie. About Tommy. About his life before Jackson. And he got to know yours. 
“Sometimes I wonder if I’m doing the right thing.” Joel suddenly said to you one day. 
You’d both been walking the grounds around the town and found yourselves looking over and in behind the wooden posts. People were mostly going about their day, working or playing. 
“Right thing about what?”
“With Ellie. She’s just a kid and she’s already seen so much. She deserves a normal life.”
“She has a normal life, Joel. As normal as it can get these days. And that’s because you gave it to her.”
“Did I, though? Y/n, she hadn’t even seen a car before we hit the road.”
With a small sigh, you walked a little further up and met Joel where he stood. “If you’re that worried about her, show her something. Teach her something. A life skill that isn’t about survival.”
“Like what?”
You shrugged and looked back over the town. There has to be something. 
“Do you know how to play the guitar?” You asked after a moment, turning back to him. 
He nodded. “Use to.”
“Well, I’ve got a guitar in my house. Found it when I was rummaging through the attic. Teach her how to play the guitar.”
You walked away and a little further through the trees, Joel quickly followed after you. “I don’t know any songs.”
“I’ve got a guitar. There’s gotta be song books somewhere in that attic. We can look when we get back into town.”
“And if there isn’t?”
“Then…make one up? It’ll be like riding a bike. Trust me.”
“Trust me.” Joel repeated. “Trust me, she says. Have you ever even played the guitar?”
You let out a small laugh. “Once. I wasn’t very good though.”
A few hours later, yourself and Joel were standing inside your house at the bottom of your attic ladders. 
“After you.” 
You stood so far away from the steps, Joel already had a feeling he knew what would be awaiting him. 
“There a reason I’m going first?” He asked, already halfway up the ladders. 
“No…”
He looked down at where you were standing; holding the ladder steady. “Okay, maybe. I found the guitar and then a massive spider. It ran away quickly. I couldn’t find it so that room is now his.”
Joel’s boots hit the floor of the attic and after a few minutes you heard a stomp before he called down to you. “Spider’s dead. You’re safe.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
Walking up the ladders, you peaked your head over the edge of the floor before taking a look around. The coast was clear. And for the next twenty minutes, you and Joel rummaged through a couple of different boxes until you both found what you were looking for, including some extra things.
“Watch your step.” Joel stood behind you a little as you climbed down the last couple of steps, the heat of his hand warming your hip before he stepped around you and pushed the ladder back up into the door, closing the hatch. 
Carrying the case of books down, you followed Joel with the box of clothes that you’d deemed salvageable. 
“Thanks, for your help.”
“Don’t mention it. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
Joel nodded. “Tomorrow.”
Just before you closed the door, you called out for him. “Joel?”
He turned around. 
“You’re a good dad. And Ellie’s a good kid. You’re doing a good job.” 
He didn’t know what to say, feeling grateful if a little awkward and unsure of himself. Looking at you from the path to your home, he wanted to walk back and…hug you? He wasn’t too sure. So, with a low nod, he gave you a brief smile before he thanked you once more and headed back home. 
As the next day came into view, Joel was rushing around the kitchen since he’d missed his alarm leaving Ellie to pound her fist on his bedroom door. 
“Done your homework?”
“We don’t have homework this week.” Ellie told him as she took another stab at her eggs. “Were you meant to see Y/n this morning?”
Joel shook his head, pulling the hot toast from his toaster before reaching for the butter knife. “Don’t think so. Why?”
“Because she’s at the door.”
A knock came less than a second later and Ellie watched as Joel became something more than just flustered. “Uhhh.”
“Want me to get it?”
“Go ahead.” He reached into the cupboard above his head and pulled out a jar of peanut butter. 
As Ellie answered the door and let you inside, letting you follow her through the house towards the kitchen, Ellie didn’t miss how neater the kitchen looked since she left. 
And she didn’t miss how Joel’s hair had gone from sticking out in most places and his shirt being buttoned wrong, to being neat and tidy. 
“Y/n’s here.”
“Hey,” Joel practically breathed out. “Were we meant to meet-”
You shook your head. “No, don’t worry. I just…” You held out the pile of clothes in your hands. “I found some more clothes last night after you left. And considering they won’t fit me, I figured you might want them. I’ve dropped some into town already but I saved these in case you needed some.”
“He does.”
“Ellie.”
“What?”
Joel looked back at you. “Thank you. That’s, uhh, that’s nice. Thanks.”
With a little awkward nod, you placed them on the kitchen table where Ellie took one from the pile and held it up. It didn’t seem like it would fit Joel. 
“There’s some there for you, too,” you told her. 
“Thanks.” 
A moment of silence settled over the kitchen before Joel’s mind was kicked back into reality. “Right, you’re gonna be late. Have you got your-”
“Lunch, books, jacket.” Ellie sounded off. 
It seemed like the list was a ritual. 
“I’ve got it all now let’s go.”
You followed Joel and Ellie out of their house and through the town, Joel walking Ellie to school before he made his way further down the road and towards the stables. 
It was your day to clean out their stables and since Joel was on construction, he’d offered to be the one to help fix a couple of the stable doors. 
And all day, talking or working in silence, you both missed the looks and stares from the rest of the town paterons. 
To them they’d seen Joel go from an asshole who spoke in grunts and rough gestures to witnessing a foreign side to him that apparently you only got to see. 
When you were around him, people saw him actually smile. A few even heard him laugh. Of course, when people mentioned it to Tommy, he was a little shocked they hadn’t seen it sooner. It had shocked him to his core when he saw his brother seem a little like his older self when he was with Ellie – laughing, smiling, joking. Even if it contained a few more swear words. So when he saw Joel practically skip into work (he didn’t. But he definitely had a pep in his step) Tommy made sure to keep an eye on what had caused the change. 
The only thing that had changed in his life outside of Ellie was you. 
You’d come into his life and the side of him that was only visible to his family was very, very slowly becoming visible to the outside world. 
Then the rumors started. 
And they circulated for months. 
“Heard any good new ones?” Tommy asked, leaning over the bar top, pretending to be interested in Ellie’s homework. 
“Overheard one of the teachers. They said they’ve met before but because she was running a herbal shop when we were on the road. Apparently she slipped something into his tea that made sure he only ever liked her if they met again.”
Tommy choked back a laugh. “Well, shit.”
“Still doesn’t beat him being a warlock and being cursed to spend his entire life with her.” Ellie said.
“Do you know who started that one?”
Ellie shook her head, pretending to be interested in her homework, too. You and Joel were on the other side of the bar, setting up a couple of hanging features before Maria could get to the ladders again. Despite her being seven months pregnant, she was determined to ignore her midwife. 
“Not yet. But when I do they better run. I like Y/n.”
“I do, too. And it really should be the other way ‘round. She’s cursed to spend her life with him. I used to live with him. I’ve seen him in the morning.”
“We’ve all seen him in the morning.”
“S’Not my fault I’m not a morning person.” Tommy practically stood to attention as Joel made his way over. “You two giving me shit?”
“No,” Ellie said far too innocently. 
Joel hummed. “I’m sure. Tommy, you seen the 2x4 I left here?”
Looking under the bar, he held it up. “This?”
Joel took it from his hand. “Thanks.”
“Hey, Maria and I were thinking about having a family dinner this week? What’d you think?”
Joel nodded after taking in Ellie’s reaction. “Sure. When?”
“Tomorrow? About 7?”
Joel nodded. “We’ll be there.”
“Hey.” 
Joel turned back to his brother. “Want to invite Y/n?”
Joel looked from his brother, to you where you were measuring out the centre of the wall on the ladder, and then back to his brother. “I can ask.”
Tommy smiled and Joel went on his way. “How long do’ya think it’ll take?”
“At this rate? An eternity.”
The next evening rolled around and you found yourself being dragged towards Tommy and Maria’s home by Maria. 
“My shift ran late but I didn’t want to come empty handed.” You explained to Tommy and Joel as you were practically launched inside by the former’s wife. 
“All is forgiven.” Tommy told you as he showed his wife what was in the tupperware you’d brought with you. “Right?”
“Yes, all is forgiven. Now let’s eat.”
Sitting down at the dinner table, Joel held out his arm and let you walk inside before him, where he held your chair out for you before tucking you under and sitting beside you and Ellie sitting on his other side. 
However, halfway through dinner, your body jerked til you sat straight. “You okay?”
“I’m fine. Just twisted myself.”
All in all, it was a nice family dinner. A couple stories were shared, some updates given and then you found yourself being walked home by Joel since Ellie had given a small salute to you both before reaching your path, saying she had to rush home to do…something. 
“Have fun, kids.”
“Take the main road!”
“Whatever you say!”
Joel gave a small groan. “She’s gonna give me a heart attack one of these days.”
You smiled. “She’ll be safe, Joel.”
Walking you to your door, Joel saw your body react to something that didn’t seem to be there. 
“Are you sure you’re okay? That’s the forth-”
You let out a laugh. “I promise, Joel. I’m okay. Just twisted myself on patrol today.”
He didn’t seem to believe you. “I swear. I’ll be okay.”
With a sigh, Joel accepted your promise. “Okay.”
Then you did something that even shocked you. You leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you, for walking me home. And for inviting me. It was a fun night.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed it.”
“We should do it more often.”
Joel smiled. “Just might.”
Then a familiar silence settled over both you and Joel. The kind of silence that was begging for something more. But then, taking in a breath, you stepped back. 
“Thank you, again. Goodnight, Joel.”
“G'night, Y/n.”
As you shut and locked the door, Joel found himself smiling as he walked away, his gaze drifting back to your home every now and again as he made his way back down the path and through the town to his own home where Ellie was waiting for him in the living room. 
“So, did you kiss her?”
“Shouldn’t you be in bed?” The look Joel gave Ellie made her feel like she was under a spot-light. It was past ten pm. 
“Answer the question?”
“Ellie.”
Standing dramatically, Ellie sighed. “Come on. I know you like her. And she likes you. Why not just kiss her already? Give the rest of us a break from the looking, and the staring and the smiling and the looking.”
Taking his daughter by her shoulders, he steered her towards the stairs and up them. “Teeth and bed. Now, please.”
“Ugh, fine. But you know I’m right.”
“Goodnight, Ellie.”
Eventually, after hearing the tap turn off and Ellie’s bedroom door shut, Joel shut his own and lay down in bed, his last thoughts being on you and what Ellie had said. 
I know you like her. And she likes you.
A few days passed, however, before he saw you again. Which worried him more than he wanted to admit. But when he finally did, he knew the minute he saw you something was wrong. 
Ellie had knocked on your front door early in the afternoon having snuck out of school. She’d invited you to watch a movie or two with her and Joel that evening. 
“We found a whole bunch at the back of one of the closets. Please say yes.”
You smiled. You’d been dying to see both of them for days but the pain that had started as your side had practically spread across your entire body overnight. 
“Okay. So long as it’s okay with Joel.”
“He said it’s okay.”
Joel didn’t know anything about it until Ellie got home from school and told him what would be happening. But he wouldn’t have said no anyway. 
Ellie had practically flung the door off its hinges when she saw you walking up the steps of their porch. 
“Someone’s excited.”
“Come on, come on, come on.” 
Ellie pulled you inside and shut the door. “Joel! She’s here.”
“Is the door still attached? No Ellie sized hole in it?”
“He’s been grumpy all week.”
“I heard that!”
Then he appeared around the corner and your heart did the same thing it had been doing for weeks whenever you did see him. But that only caused you more pain in your chest. 
“Ellie, go and bring the box down. We need to see which ones need to be rewound.”
Ellie looked between the pair of you before disappearing up the stairs. 
“Hey, sorry I didn’t-”
“Show me.”
“What?” You took a small step back as Joel was about to take one forward. 
“Y/n. Show me.”
Carefully walking over to you, you shook your head. “I’m fine, Joel.”
He was a little less abrupt this time. “Show me?”
His fingers traced the hem of your t-shirt and with a reluctant but painful sigh, you carefully removed your jacket with his help. 
“Can I?”
With a soft nod, Joel took his eyes from yours and lifted the corner of your t-shirt only to be met with deep purple bruises with spots of black, green and yellow. 
“It’s not as bad as it looks. It’s starting to heal.”
Joel didn’t seem amused. “Y/n-” Then he noticed the others. “You’ve been cut. Jesus. Fuck. Come with me.”
Taking your hand in his, he pulled you towards the kitchen. “Sit down.”
“Joel, I’m fine.”
“Sit down.”
“If I sit down, it hurts more.”
Another silence washed over you both before he turned back to his freezer and pulled out a couple of ice packs. “Here…can I?”
You gave him your permission once more and he lifted your t-shirt and placed the ice packs against your sides. You could feel his thumb rubbing light lines across your side as he held you steady. 
“Got 'em’ I think a couple- holy shit.”
Ellie got a clear view of the deep bruises across you. “Ellie, can you run and get the first aid kit from the bathroom?”
“Yea, are you okay?”
You nodded. “I’ll be fine. I promise.”
“Ellie.” Joel pushed. She nodded quickly then ran upstairs in search of the kit. 
“That’s what you told me.” Joel mumbled under his breath. 
“It didn’t look this bad.”
“When did it happen?”
There was no point in lying to him anymore. “Patrol before the dinner.”
“Who did it?”
“I slipped and fell against one of the trees.”
Flicking his eyes from your wounds and back to your face, one of his hands ran around the rim of your top until it was lifted high enough for him to get a clear picture, he shook his head. “Trees don’t tend to have rifles as branches.”
“It was mine.”
Joel pointed at one of the longer bruises. “This one…is yours.”
He pointed at the other one. “Whose was this?”
He looked you in your eyes but you shook your head. “Joel…”
“Got it.” Ellie landed at the bottom of the stairs. 
“Thanks, kiddo.”
Pulling a chair out, Joel sat beside you. “Sure you don’t want to sit?”
You shook your head. “Not yet.”
“Okay. Ellie, go and see if you can rewind some of those tapes.”
She just nodded slowly. “Okay.”
Joel waited until she left the room before asking you to remove your shirt. It took you a minute but with his help you finally got it over your head. Under any other context, Joel’s eyes trailing your body would have been for another reason outside of his brain counting each cut and scrape you’d gotten and each bruise that was trying its best to heal. 
“This might sting.”
You nodded and bit your lip as the cold disinfectant hit your wounds. Some of them you didn’t even know existed considering you could only turn your body so far to look in the mirror before it screamed for you to remain still. 
“Was it your partner?”
You swallowed thickly. “No.”
Your back was to him for the moment, so that made it easier to tell him the truth. “One of the others. They were hearing noises. His partner had left him and he got lost. Must have heard me and just…jumped. He didn’t mean to. He’s just a kid, Joel. He got scared. Did what most of us would have done.”
“You could have been shot.”
“But I wasn’t. I’m okay, Joel.”
He shook his head. “Says the woman covered in bruises and scars.”
“They’ll heal. I’ll heal.”
“What’s his partner’s name?”
“Joel.”
“Just tell me. If you don’t, I’ll ask around and Maria can be the one to deal with him.”
You sighed. “Promise me you won’t do anything stupid.”
“What his partner did was stupid.”
“Joel.”
He grunted. “I promise.”
Swearing halfway through as Joel pressed another cotton swab of disinfectant to a scar, you told him his name. Joel had a couple of run ins with him over the last couple of months. A jock twenty years out of college, still trying to haze the kids under his authority. 
Ten minutes or so later, Joel had finished and replaced the ice packs you’d been holding at your side. 
Laying them on either side of your body as you turned around, your t-shirt falling back around your body. He slowly stood and you held onto his arms, your eyes closing. 
“Any better?”
You nodded. “Much. Thank you.”
You both stood there for a few moments, your eyes closed, feeling the throbbing in your sides settle more than it had done in the last couple of days. And as you let out a calm breath, Joel leaned against you a little and pressed a kiss to your forehead before you rested it against his chest. 
“I think I’m ready to sit now.”
“Okay,” Joel whispered before pressing another kiss to the top of your head before walking with you into the living room, finding a set up already made by Ellie. 
“I thought the blankets might help.”
You smiled at her. “Thank you, Ellie.”
She smiled from her spot on the floor by the TV, her finger still holding the rewind button down. Joel helped you sit down. 
“So, what are the options?”
Ellie read out a couple of the boxes. There were a lot of Disney films, a couple of thrillers and a few more different blockbusters. So, sticking his hand into the box without looking, Joel pulled one out. 
Ellie read the cover. “Field of Dreams.”
“Ooh, that’s a good one.”
Ellie looked at Joel for confirmation and he nodded. “Stick it in, kid.”
Sitting beside you, you leaned against Joel for support and very soon after, Ellie joined his other side. 
“Does he dream about a field?”
“Just watch it and you’ll find out.”
Around 40 minutes into the movie, Joel felt a steady weight against his arm where he turned and found Ellie fast asleep. So carefully reaching over, he pulled a blanket over her and held her steady against him. 
“She asleep?”
“Yep. Yet to get through a movie with her awake.”
You smiled. 
“You get much sleep recently?”
“Enough to keep me going.” Joel didn’t say anything but when he placed his arm around your shoulders, that said everything. 
“This always made me cry.” You whispered to Joel as Archie stepped across the line and became his older self. 
“How many times have you seen this film?” He’d caught you a couple of times mouthing the lines along with the characters. 
You felt your cheeks heat. “A couple. Before I came to Wyoming, one of my neighbours had a VCR and two films. This and The Parent Trap. Since I’d look after her two kids when she worked, it didn’t take long for me to learn the scripts.”
“So how much do you know of The Parent Trap?”
You felt yourself chuckle. “We can watch it and find out.”
Joel laughed quietly, too, before carefully pulling you closer. “How’s your side?”
You looked up at him. “Better. Thank you.”
“Good.”
Joel pressed a kiss to your head before getting settled with both you and Ellie. And just as Kevin Costner started to play a game of catch, you felt yourself drift off to sleep. 
You didn’t know how long had passed since the movie ended but when your body hit a soft surface, you stirred awake. 
“Shush, it’s okay. Go back to sleep.”
“Joel.”
“It’s okay. I’m gonna check on Ellie.”
Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to your head but you mustered enough energy to reach out for him. “Come back.”
“I promise.” Lifting your hand, he pressed a light kiss to your knuckles. You woke up again when a weight dipped on the other side of the bed. Then you heard a familiar groan as his body settled into the softness of the mattress. 
You shuffled closer to Joel. 
Waking for the third time, the room was being lit with the soft rays of the sun and beside you, deep breaths were being taken by Joel as he remained in a deep sleep. 
If this was anyone else, you probably would have left. Hell, you wouldn’t have fallen asleep in the first place. But you trusted Joel. More so than most. You also found him to be steadier than most. He’d shared some of what had happened on the road with him and Ellie, as well as what happened before. Life hadn’t been steady with him, and yet, there he lay. Stable. Able. Strong. Maybe not as he was twenty years ago, but still. Trustworthy. And beneath it all…kind. Caring. Sensitive; even if he wouldn’t admit it. He knew when people were hurt, or hurting. And maybe for others he’d seem gruff. But not with you. Not with Ellie. Not with those he loved and cared deeply for. 
With his hand wrapped over yours, you lifted it and pressed a kiss to the back of his hand. Maybe Joel Miller could be an asshole. But to you he was a decently kind man. 
Maybe others wouldn’t see that considering between the hour that Joel had left to pick a package up from Tommy, leaving you and Ellie to find another tape to play, your attacker’s partner found his nose broken and had been given a black eye. But you didn’t mind his kindness being kept a secret from the rest of the world. 
Those he cared for knew the truth. 
You knew the truth. 
And nothing could ever change that. 
150 notes · View notes
sherewrytes · 15 hours ago
Text
Plug Kento Nanami
Plug Nanami: Who shows up on time, every time, dressed like he’s on his way to a party or club instead of making a drop-off, with perfectly rolled joints and not a single hair out of place.
Plug Nanami: Who never raises his voice but somehow manages to make you feel like you owe him more than just payment with that low, smooth tone of his.
Plug Nanami: Who refuses to let you short yourself, sliding a little extra into your bag with a soft, "Consider it a bonus for being such a loyal customer."
Plug Nanami: Who texts you after every transaction with, "Everything to your satisfaction?" like he’s taking customer service to a whole new level.
Plug Nanami: Who only ever stays for a quick chat, but the way he adjusts his glasses and lets his eyes linger on you a moment too long makes your heart race.
Plug Nanami: Who once showed up in the middle of a rainstorm, soaking wet but completely unbothered, handing over your pre-rolls with a deadpan, "You’re lucky I prioritize good clients."
Plug Nanami: Who has this effortless dominance about him, the kind that makes you want to do things just to see him smirk in approval.
Plug Nanami: Who caught you once in your oversized sweats and bonnet and still said, "You look good," like it was a fact, not a compliment.
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t miss a beat when you flirt with him, offering a small chuckle before responding, "Careful now. I don’t mix business with pleasure… unless you’re willing to change my mind."
Plug Nanami: Who makes it very clear he’s not just your plug but also someone who notices everything, including when you’re stressed or looking run-down. "You need to take care of yourself," he says softly, slipping your favorite chocolate bar into your hand without a word.
Plug Nanami: Who’s always clean-cut, rocking a crisp white tee or a fitted hoodie, gold chain resting against his chest, looking more like a businessman than someone pushing product—but you know better.
Plug Nanami: Who runs his drops like clockwork, his Hellcat pulling up smooth and quiet. He leans out the window with a calm, "You good? Don’t keep me waiting too long."
Plug Nanami: Who surprises you with how he speaks—smooth, deliberate, but with just enough edge to make you sit up and pay attention. "You know I don’t do half measures, ma. You get the best from me, every time."
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t just drop off the bag—he stays a little longer, leaning against the doorframe with a calm confidence, arms crossed, giving you a look that says he knows exactly what’s on your mind.
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t deal with nonsense, shutting down any funny business with a sharp, "Don’t play with my time." But with you? He’s always patient, his voice softening when he says, "Take your time. I’m in no rush."
Plug Nanami: Who tells you he doesn’t do freebies but somehow always slides you a little extra. "Just quality control," he smirks, though you know he’s lying.
Plug Nanami: Who keeps his stash on lock, never running out of the best strains, and every time you ask where he gets it, he just chuckles and says, "That’s my secret."
Plug Nanami: Who caught you once buying from someone else and didn’t say a word until his next drop-off. "Whatever they gave you? Trash. Stick with me, and I’ll make sure you’re never disappointed again."
Plug Nanami: Who shows up in his car, windows cracked, bass low, smelling like clean cologne and a faint hint of weed. He smirks when he catches you looking. "You like the vibe, huh? I can give you more than just this."
Plug Nanami: Who noticed you peeking at his tattoos one time and rolled up his sleeve just enough to show them off. "Curious, huh? Maybe one day I’ll let you trace them yourself."
Plug Nanami: Who, when you try to flirt too hard, chuckles low and deep, leaning closer to whisper, "You know you’re trouble, right? Keep talking like that, and I might start making house calls for more than just business."
Plug Nanami: Who, when you ask why he pushes product when he clearly doesn’t need to, just shrugs and says, "Sometimes the best things come from unexpected places," before giving you that look that leaves you questioning who’s really in control.
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t react when you tease him about being too refined for this game. Instead, he steps closer, his voice dropping. "Don’t let my look fool you, baby. I know exactly what I’m doing—and I know you love it."
Plug Nanami: Who caught you at a party once, surrounded by people you didn’t know, looking out of place. He walked right up to you, slid his arm around your waist, and whispered, "You good? Or you need me to remind you where you belong?"
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t hesitate to pull you aside when someone else tries to step to you, his tone cool but firm. "She’s with me. Don’t make me repeat myself."
Plug Nanami: Who, when you’re standing at the door in nothing but booty shorts and a cropped hoodie, doesn’t even try to hide the way his eyes sweep over you, his voice steady but rough. "You knew I was coming, and this is how you answer the door? You trying to start something, Y/N?"
Plug Nanami: Who stays calm when you playfully call him "Mr. Businessman," but steps closer, his broad shoulders towering over you as he murmurs, "Keep testing me, and I’ll show you just how serious I can be."
Plug Nanami: Who has this habit of brushing his fingers against yours when handing over your bag, just to see you react. And when you hesitate, he smirks. "What? You shy now? You weren’t shy last week when you were talking crazy to me."
Plug Nanami: Who, when you ask for recommendations, takes his time explaining the strains, his voice low and intimate like he’s telling you secrets no one else gets to hear. "This one’s for relaxing. But this one? This will have you feeling nice and warm. Could even help you sleep... if you’re alone."
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t hide his jealousy when he spots you dancing with some random dude at the club again. He doesn’t make a scene—he doesn’t have to. One hard look from across the room, and he has you second-guessing every move.
Plug Nanami: Who waits for you by the bar, calm but commanding, sipping his drink like he owns the place. When you finally approach him, he leans in close, his breath warm against your ear. "Was that supposed to make me jealous? 'Cause all it did was remind me who you’re really coming home to."
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t just say things to say them—when he tells you, "You’re mine," he says it with a quiet intensity that makes your heart race, his hand resting lightly on your waist like a promise.
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t let you forget who’s in control. When you try to test him, he tilts his head, studying you with those sharp eyes before muttering, "Careful, Y/N. You don’t want to see what happens when I lose my patience."
Plug Nanami: Who, when he finally breaks that calm exterior, has you pinned against the couch, his hands firm on your thighs. His voice drops an octave as he says, "You think you can tease me and get away with it? Let me show you how wrong you are."
Plug Nanami: Who has you breathless by the time he’s done with you, his lips grazing your ear as he whispers, "Next time, don’t make me wait. You know I’m not good at sharing."
Plug Nanami: Who, even after all that, stays to clean up and roll another joint for you, his demeanor back to calm and collected as if nothing happened. He hands it to you with a small smirk. "Don’t say I never take care of you, ma."
Plug Nanami: Who always makes you feel special, even in the smallest ways—like when he leaves your place, pressing a kiss to your forehead before saying, "Stay out of trouble. I’ll be back when you need me."
Plug Nanami: Who, despite his smooth and professional vibe, lets his street-smart edge show when it matters. Like when he rolls up late at night after you text him about some dude getting too friendly at the bar. He leans against his car, arms crossed, his tone deadly calm. "You good? Or you need me to handle something?"
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t flinch when you ask why he’s so quiet during his drops. Instead, he gives you a slow, knowing smirk. "Why talk when I can let my actions speak for me? You like what I bring, don’t you?"
Plug Nanami: Who, after spotting you dancing with another guy at the club when your out with your friends one night, waits for you outside like he’s completely unbothered. But the second you walk up to him; his voice is sharp. "Next time you feel like playing games, make sure I’m the one who gets to win."
Plug Nanami: Who, when you tease him for his clean-cut image, throws it right back. "Don’t get it twisted, Y/N. Just because I dress like this doesn’t mean I can’t get dirty when I need to."
Plug Nanami: Who finally snaps one night after you keep pushing his buttons, pinning you against the wall, his lips grazing your ear as he growls, "You like testing me, huh? Let me show you why that’s a bad idea."
Plug Nanami: Who keeps his car spotless, but when you ride with him, lets you kick off your shoes and play your music, saying, "Don’t get used to this. You’re lucky I like you."
Plug Nanami: Who always gives you the best quality, but one night, he surprises you with a strain he says is "special order." When you ask why he’s letting you try it first, he shrugs casually. "Because I know you appreciate the finer things. Just like me."
Plug Nanami: Who never loses his cool but lets his territorial side show in subtle ways. Like the way he casually slips his arm around your waist when you’re out, his grip firm enough to make anyone watching back off.
Plug Nanami: Who doesn’t just drop off weed—he becomes the only person you trust with your stash because everything he does is handled with precision. "You’re too good for anything less than perfect, Y/N," he says, his eyes locking onto yours in a way that makes you forget to breathe.
Plug Nanami: Who stays just long enough to remind you why he’s different. He doesn’t just pass the bag; he holds your gaze and leans in close, his voice low and deliberate. "Anything else you need tonight? You know I got you."
Plug Nanami: Who, after you’ve pushed him to his limit, leaves you breathless and spent, only to calmly adjust his hoodie and smirk down at you. "See? Told you not to test me."
Plug Nanami: Who, as he’s leaving, tosses a wrapped pre-roll on your table with a smirk. "That one’s on me. Thought you might need it after… all that.I'll be back later. I got another drop off"
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munson-blurbs · 10 hours ago
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Single Dad!Eddie x Fem!ReaderSeries
Summary: It's Hendrix's first Thanksgiving, and though he's not even one month old, he still manages to be part of a sweet surprise.
TW: Reader is breastfeeding, mention of Grandma, reference to the events of chapter 8
WC: 1.2k
Divider credit to @saradika
November 1999
You had given Eddie one job: buy the items on the shopping list—and only the items on the shopping list. There’s the usual weekly groceries, but now there’s the addition of ingredients for Thanksgiving dinner. 
And, of course, a plethora of diapers and wipes for your nearly three-week-old son. 
Sweet baby Hendrix is the reason why you’re excused from navigating the overcrowded Walmart aisles, and why Eddie and Harris have gone in your place. You gaze down at your infant son, wincing as he latches onto your breast. 
“There you go, little man,” you murmur, smoothing down a wisp of his hair. “We’ve got this.”
The apartment is unnaturally quiet; the only sound coming from the living room radiator kicking on to ward off the early winter chill. It’s the calm before the holiday whirlwind, a slice of silence carved out just for you. 
You savor it, inhaling deeply. Hendrix remains undisturbed by your chest rising and falling, happy to be filling his belly before his next nap. He spends his days eating, sleeping, or crying. As Harris says, he doesn’t do any tricks yet. 
Hendrix finishes nursing as the front door clicks open. Adjusting your shirt, you offer Eddie and Harris a tired smile. 
“Glad to see you two survived.”
“Sure did.” Eddie places the bags on the countertop. “And we stayed within budget.”
Your heart surges when he begins unpacking and pulls out a plastic bag filled with Granny Smith apples. Even though Eddie and Wayne will be doing most of the cooking this year—which means a lot of pre-made and boxed dishes—you had insisted on making Grandma’s applesauce. 
“These the right ones?” Eddie asks, wiping a fake bead of sweat from his brow when you answer in the affirmative. “Thank God. I know how much the applesauce means to you.”
You offer a grateful smile as he presses a gentle kiss to your forehead. It reminds you of the very first Thanksgiving you’d spent with him happened before you two were a couple—before he’d even taken you on a date. 
And, no, the drunken hook-up after his show at The Hideout didn’t count. 
Thanksgiving 1996 was spent eating Oreos and snuggling up on the couch, watching A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving with Eddie and Harris. Grandma was still alive, and you even caught a glimpse of her pre-illness self when Eddie played the Sinatra record. It seems like a million years ago, but it’s only been three. 
“Mommy, guess what?” Seven-year-old Harris calls out from where he’s peering into Hendrix’s bassinet. He doesn’t give you time to guess before he blurts out, “we got a surprise!”
You raise your brows. “A surprise? What is it?”
“Can’t tell ya.” He throws you a wink—where did he even learn that?—and makes a beeline for his room. 
Turning to your husband, you put your hands on your hips. “That surprise better not be more candy,” you warn. “He still has so much left from Halloween.”
Eddie shakes his head and grins. “Not candy.”
“Then what?”
“Can’t tell ya.” Eddie mimics the same wink as his oldest son, solving the mystery of its origin, tucking one particular bag underneath his arm. 
If you weren’t still freshly postpartum, you may have chased after him and insisted that he spill the secret. For now, you settle for flipping him off, and he blows you a cheeky kiss in return. 
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Thanksgiving begins like any other normal day. Well, normal for the Munson household. 
Hendrix wakes up around the clock, but you get up for the day when his shrill wail jolts you from your sleep at six A.M. Your breasts are heavy with milk; a good thing, considering he sounds hungry. 
Harris, clad in his blue flannel pajamas, shuffles into your bedroom an hour later. He’s still wiping sleep from his eyes even as he talks. 
“Can we watch the parade?”
You hold your forefinger to your lips, praying that Harris’s entrance doesn’t wake the baby sleeping in Eddie’s arms. 
“It’s not on for another hour, Har Bear,” you whisper, patting the comforter. “But you can hang out with us until then.”
Harris nods, scrambling up onto the bed and plopping down between you and his dad. He glances up at Eddie with a pout. 
“Can I hold Hendrix? Pleeeeeease?”
Never one to shy away from theatrics, his brown eyes are wide as he pleads. 
“Actually,” Eddie says, his gaze flicking over to Harris, “I think we should get the surprise ready?”
Harris wrinkles his nose for a split second before he remembers. “Oh, yeah!” He tugs on Eddie’s undershirt sleeve. “We gotta do the surprise.”
You reach out for the baby, but Eddie shakes his head. “Not so fast, Sweetheart. All of the Munson boys are in on this.”
You’re not quite sure what your three-week-old could possibly contribute, but damn if you’re not intrigued. So you sit back, propped up against the pillows, and wait for them to return. 
Five minutes is long enough for you to doze off again, your body desperate for any scrap of sleep it can get. 
“Dad, she’s sleeping!” It comes from a voice right next to your ear. 
“Gently wake her up.” This voice is a bit farther away. Something shakes you. “I said gently, Har!”
You blink, massaging the back of your stiff neck from the awkward position you assumed during your impromptu nap. 
“I’m up.” You manage a small, tired smile. Harris stands right next to your bedside, but Eddie and Hendrix are nowhere to be found. “Is my surprise ready?”
Harris nods, glancing back at the empty doorway. “So…we just unwrapped the turkey, and it looks a little weird.”
He’s supposed to deliver it like it’s bad news, but his mischievous smile betrays him. 
Still, you play along. “It looks weird? What do you mean?”
That’s apparently Eddie’s cue. He creeps into the room, cradling Hendrix in his arms. Except the baby is no longer wearing his sage green pajamas. Now, he dons a brown onesie, a cartoon turkey face emblazoned on the belly. But the pièce de résistance is a tiny hat, a light brown pom pom puffing out from the top.
“That’s the cutest turkey I’ve ever seen!” Tears spring to your eyes, another sign that you’re still in the throes of postpartum hormones. You wipe them away before they can cause concern for the emotionally intuitive Harris. 
You reach out to take the teeny turkey from your husband. “I could just eat you right up,” you coo, pressing a kiss to Hendrix’s chubby cheek and breathing in his baby powder scent. 
“I found it,” Harris announces with a triumphant grin, “and Dad paid for it.”
“I know my place,” Eddie chuckles. “My wallet and I were ready.”
There’s a beat of silence as you take it all in. Your husband, proudly beaming as you snuggle Hendrix to your chest. Your oldest son, tickling Hendrix’s onesie-clad feet and making himself laugh. And your newborn-turned-turkey, scrunching up and then unfurling his little fist as he relaxes contentedly.
Harris looks up at you expectantly. “Is the parade on now?”
You and Eddie laugh, and Eddie ruffles Harris’s hair. 
There’s certainly plenty to be thankful for this year.
--
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fairiesthrum · 2 days ago
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ummmmmm excuse me, my dearest fae, you can’t just say this and then not expand???
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bounty hunter satoru?? do you think he has a dirty little space ship that desperately needs maintenance and he constantly brings back aliens from trips just so he can play around with them, exploring their bodies till they’re trembling and whining…………………………………
🎀 — humblest apologies for not explaining myself further alba 😓 (incoming yap session)
imagine in a galaxy far, far away, there’s a place where aliens and humans co-exist. now, about most of the population of aliens appear pretty humanoid, just very colorful skin and hair (pink, purple, green, blue, etc.)
the setting is very much like that of guardians of the galaxy, and gojo satoru is the most notorious bounty hunter there is. i imagine him (i’ll try to post a drawing soon) with a lot of cyber tech. his whole outfit would be black and he uses two guns, one with blue led lights and the other red (trying to get y’all to envision.) he’d also have his signature blindfold but instead, it comes in the form of cyber tech mask glasses that can dematerialize by pressing a button on the side (kinda like peter quill’s.)
he rarely ever misses when he shoots and he always catches the perps (nah, i’d win space edition.) and satoru is very serious abt his job (ik shocking but he’s gotta make that bag somehow and being a bounty hunter pays really well.) he’s very confident to say that nothing is able to distract or deter him from getting it done. but unfortunately for him, he has only one weakness. and that was alien girl puthayy 😛
see, the problem was, aliens and humans can not reproduce with one another. it wasn’t impossible, it was just against the rules. and by that definition, it also meant that it was illegal to have sex with one another. but let’s be fr, it’s going to happen whether it’s outlawed or not.
the first time satoru’s fucked an alien woman, it was at a strip club. as a man, he was curious to what it’d feel like to fuck one. and unfortunately for him, it was the best he’s ever had. it was his guilty pleasure, the one thing no-one could know about or else, it’d risk his job. but it was just too good. and where he used to jerk his cock off to human girls on his ship, now he does it thinking about alien girls. it always has him coming fast, and sometimes, just the thought can have him busting a nut in his pants, completely untouched.
he’s never had mind-blowing sex like that before in his life. the man is already a sex fanatic and craves it all the time (it helps him blow off steam), but he can’t cum when fucking regular human women anymore ;( it’s cause aliens were far more sensitive than humans, their senses advanced with the ability to feel more. and there was no feeling on earth (pun intended) like rutting into a warm cunt that was eager to suck him in, strangling his cock cuz some alien chick was horny out of her mind, pussy practically drooling all over him.
it’d have to be a secret though. and luckily for satoru, no one suspects someone like him, who’s job was to hunt down rogue aliens, to love sloppy extraterrestrial pussy.
satoru’s ship is made from the same advanced tech as his suit. it gets dirty from his constant partying and hook-ups. so, when he needs to get it checked cuz some huge beefy alien dude breaks his console during one of his ragers, he doesn’t bring it to the usual repair shop everyone goes to for their space ships. oh no no, he goes to one run by the other species.
there were a lot of hot ladies working there (because sexism doesn’t exist amongst aliens like at least they doing sumn right unlike us 😒) so, a lot of the times, his ship doesn’t end up fixed at the end.
he… likes to stay and watch them with dark, hooded eyes as they prance around his ship, eager to do their job. every once in a while, he’ll put a hand on their hip, letting it linger just long enough before pulling away when he comes over to “check on the progress.” the touch isn’t uninvited, he knows from the sultry gazes and flirty touches that are given in turn that they’re very much into him too.
it’s not long before he has them bent over the console, thrusting into the warm gooeyness of their sticky hole as they mewl and whine for more of his fat cock while he pinches their sensitive nipples ‘till they squirm.
they’re loud, and he loves it. it feeds his ego to know how hungry they are for him, for his cock. aliens were known for multiplying by the dozen, he assumes it has something to do with that. satoru’s thought about it before, breeding an alien. it was just a fantasy though, a fantasy that has him spilling his cum inside them on the spot, their needy whimpers begging him to.
that was his routine, catching criminals and fucking alien girl pussy on the side. and when his next mission entails finding some lady who stole some priceless piece of tech that could’ve sold for a lot, he was on board to find you right away (and that had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you were smoking hot.)
it was easy for him to track you, he was the best at this job after all. you try to flee but he manhandles you against the wall, trapping you with your wrists pinned behind you, his chest up against your back. his warm breath hits your neck, panting from chasing you down. satoru’s eyes are dilated, but you’re unable to see with your cheek pressed against the cool metal in front of you.
this wasn’t what you had expected, you were caught so easily! it was a bad idea from the start, but it was either take a leap of faith and end up rich or be broke forever.
the pleas instantly leave your lips, begging to be let go. you didn’t want to go to prison. you were young and had so much to live for! (the two cents in your back pocket 😓) satoru listened, his cerulean eyes twinkling with amusement and poorly concealed arousal as you went on, swearing how you’d never do it again, that he could take back what you stole and forget it ever happened. he contemplated for a moment, choosing his cards carefully, before he’s leaning in next to your ear to whisper, “no can do, sweetheart.”
you shiver, and the atmosphere seems to change around you suddenly at the shift in his tone. a feeling you were all too familiar with stirs in your stomach, your body simply a slave to pleasure (curse your biology!) and the way he had spoken to you just then had you wet in a matter of seconds.
you try to compromise, “i’ll do anything!” it flies out of your mouth before you can even think. and he smirks, like he had been waiting for that the entire time.
“anything?”
and that’s how you end up getting railed by the human man who was sent to capture you.
“‘s so fucking good— fuck!”, he’s slurring by your ear, like he was getting drunk off of pounding into you. the thrusts were desperate, as if he could never get enough of your insides. satoru could stay like this forever, watching his cock slide in and out, stretching you open with his girth. he clings onto you like he never wants to let go, your wrists free and resting on the metal in front of you, the warm puffs of your breath condensing on the cold alloy. strong pale arms covered in high-tech were wrapped tightly around your waist while his hips thrust into you with a hungered fervor.
the tip of his mushroom head hits that spot inside you that has you seeing stars and absolutely gushing around him. he gives you a low groan of approval when you clench, “jus’ like that pretty, jus’ like that—”
then he lets you go after blowing a load inside you, leaving you with shaky legs and a throbbing for more. and you totally don’t start thieving more often just so he can come find you and do it all over again.
anyways, that is all i have for space bounty hunter gojo lol ₓₓ
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sulumuns-dootah · 3 days ago
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Can I request a headcanon of wbh kings reacting to a gn mc who's a actress/actor and watching a horror killer movie mc played in (mc is the final person to die)
WHB kings w/ MC acting in horror movie
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⟡ Masterlist ⟡
A/N: Hi! Sorry for the wait, Fall is always kinda rough on my mental health U.U
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
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When you told Satan that you're in a horror movie, he was super excited
Certified horror movie enjoyer right there
Oh and when he found out you were on the poster of it?
Suddenly it's all over Gehenna and many screenings are scheduled in pretty much all the cinemas
Before, however, it is shown anywhere publicly, Satan wants to watch it with you alone
During the movie he'd joke that he's expecting your character to be one of the first ones to die since it's a rule that hot characters die first
But then he realizes there's only about 20 minutes of the movie left and your character is still alive
Maybe you're one of those final survivors who don't die?
Nope :)
Just as the final credits start to roll in, the killer jumpscares the audience by surprise lounging at your character and kills them as the credits roll list all the names of everyone who took part in the production
       ༺☆༻
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Similar to Satan's reaction, but Mammon only has a screening in a handful of cinemas of his choosing
Obviously,as the star you are, the screening also has a meet and greet with you included
Bimet was the one to organise everything, so you can imagine how expensive the tickets are
Mammon will also want a private screening before letting anyone else watch it
And since for example Texas Chainsaw Massacre did it: If there's a scene with your ass all over the screen, Mammon will be obsessed and make it his personality for the next century :)
Now, getting back to the end of the movie and seeing your way too suden death, you sneak a peek at Mammon to see his reaction and he, to be fair, looks unmoved
But then you notice him being more clingy than usual
When you ask him about it, he'll give you, honestly, the best answer:
"Seeing you die made me realise I don't ever want to loose you in reality"
       ༺☆༻
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Exact opposite
Nobody except for you and him are allowed to watch it
Now, Levi will be happy to tell everyone that his partner is an actor/actress in movies, but will never say which ones
What's it to them? They can't appreciate your presence on screen correctly
The next thing you know they'll be making fan edits and write fanfics about you and either the killer or some random self-insert instead of Leviathan - your ACTUAL partner
The movie will kinda become shadow banned in Hades bc the people will fear their king will find out they watched it and hang them to death for it
The only one to openly talk about it is Glasyalabolas bc of course
He's hoping he can catch some other demons while they pretend to not know what he's talking about despite secretly watching it
(Oof, I can even imagine: You know how are those videos like 'Top 5 movies you shouldn't watch'? Your movie will be every no.1 on those lists :D)
       ༺☆༻
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When you told Beel about your new found stardom, he tried acting surprised but you both knew his act was bad
He knew even before you knew and accepted the offer from the casting director
And you could swear you think he was there during the shoot
Or at least you thought you saw him for a flash by the catering table, moments before someone started raising all hell because someone ate all the pizza again
So when you suggest a movie night with your movie, he already has some stuff prepared at some secret location
Maybe he might even send some pics of you cosying together to Bael just to piss him off
       ༺☆༻
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Belphegor just to happened to be half-awake when you came excitedly running to his room
He had half the mind to just fall back asleep, but then you started talking about some movie you were in, so he decided to give you at least some of his time
"Oh, and you want me to watch it now or...?"
Sure, you can join him in bed and watch it with him, but he can't promise he'll stay awake the whole time
Maybe only until your character dies, because after that you won't mind, right?
Oh boy, did he not know...
To be fair, he does watch the whole movie until then, but might not be awake long enough for him to give a review of your performance
       ༺☆༻
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"Oh, you're in a movie, my pretty little bitch? Sure, let's watch it."
You know where this leads to...
By the time the first kill happens you're already folded in half, taking Asmo in and screaming louder than the poor victim in the movie
But Asmo actually is interested in your character, so whenever you're on screen, he slows down and shushes you so that he can hear the other you
By the time your character dies, you've already cume multiple times and are about ready to pass out just like in the movie
After the movie's over, Asmo will actually give you a good review and ideas on what to work on (including your stamina ;))
       ༺☆༻
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You didn't even get to be the one to tell Lucifer
Of course Gamigin had to accidentally let it slip while begging Lucifer to partake with the rest of demons in a movie night
You wanted to surprise Luci by putting the movie on and seeing if him or any other demon catches on to recognise the bad-ass final girl/guy as you
After that Luci hears you scolding Gamigin for the slip up so he decides to act like he didn't know you'll be in the movie
He's not really convincing, but it's the thought that counts, right?
After the movie's finished, you anxiously ask everyone for the opinion
Everyone has nice things to say, except for the SFX team and the many inaccuracies they noticed
But... Luci is silent
At least until everyone's gone to bed for the night
After that he'll have you sit on his lap and whisper so much praise into your ear
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angrykittybarbarian · 11 hours ago
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About that Dragon Age: The Veilguard audio web series
Thinking back about the marketing for DATV I now realize it was kind of deceptive.
No, it was not literal fraud. They did not make specific promises and then broke them, not explicitely and in a way you could hold them liable in court over. And I get when you are advertising your product you will of course highlight its most favorable aspects while not shoving its negative sides into everyone's noses.
However I do think that EA/Bioware did stretch out the boundaries between regular endorsement and fraud.
It started with the web series Vows and Vengeance they uploaded weekly on Youtube right before release. At that time I was still hopeful and excited for the game. And Vows and Vengeance all but encouraged that excitement.
You know why? Because, and this surprised me, it was genuinely good.
Vows and Vengeance functioned as an early introduction to the companions. While they were not the main characters they did play a key role in each episode. The plot was what could be typically expected from a regular DA installment. It had a dark, gripping story. The dialogue was well written. It dealt with mature themes, it actually discussed the classism of Tevinter.
Lucanis was a proper crow who killed a good man because he was hired to do so. He was positively morally grey. Davrin had actually strong opinions when the main character dropped the Dread Wolf's name. Bellara was interesting in that it became clear how she struggled with her ADHD without using infantile language, Scout Harding acted smart, mature and competent, Taash was a morally grey bad ass, fitting for a freelance treasure hunter and with smart and witty dialogue to go with it.
It was amazing, I found myself excited every week for a new episode. It got me interested in the companions. I already contemplated to romance Taash because they were so cool and charismatic in that series. I thought, if a FREE webseries that was made for advertisement was already this great then the game had to be nothing short of phenomenal.
And then it just...wasn't. There was nothing of the depth that came through in the web series. It was as if I was presented with a sample of a multilayered chocolate cake but got a dry brownie after I actually paid the full price for it.
The sheer audacity behind this course of action is still so inconcievable to me, I sometimes still wonder why they put effort into writing the free thing and not the product they demand payment for. I still don't get it. The only explanation is they purposefully put out a misleading sample to lure in the customers in the beginning to spend money, right?
This fraud adjacent behavior does not stop there.
Remember when we thought we would be importing our worldstates from our previous games? There wasn't even a question about it in the beginning because this is such an intrinsic Bioware feature. But then the info about the three choices in the character creator leaked.
Leaked!
Meaning they never intended for this information to be known pre-release. They fully intended to keep it secret until it would be too late. They also never said they wanted a soft reboot.
This is the conclusion the fandom has drawn after they destroyed their own lore and went scorched earth on the entire south of Thedas.
And the biggesr lie was when they said this was their best work. After all this!
This is the reason why DATV's shortcomings are so devastating. This is why so many feel like the game was a slap to their faces. EA/Bioware gaslit and manipulated us from the very beginning. We have been cheated and betrayed.
The last bit of trust I and many others had in Bioware, they mercilessly crushed.
I personally will never take even one thing they say at face value again. You can only trust their actions from now on.
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starmocha · 7 hours ago
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OK. I THINK I HAVE A NEW IDEA OF HOW SYLUS' MYTH WILL PLAY OUT.
"Amidst the chaos, wings flap and stir up a whirlwind of sand and gravel. On that day, the girl marked for execution unleashed the Fiend from the Abyss."
— Official summary in Where Darkshadows Fall trailer description box
This will be my third theory. Theories 1 & 2 share the same post and are very, very brief, and honestly, not as well-developed.
OK, let's get started <333
For whatever reason, MC is to be executed. I theorize that she hopes to escape her death sentence and she seeks out Sylus, the infamous dragon said to bring about Philos' downfall. Perhaps, she assumes that if she can slay him, she will be pardoned.
However, she is obviously weaker than him. Sylus, as we know him, is a very complex person. Even though he does have an imposing aura, he does not attack without reason, and he also does not attack people weaker than him.
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I believe this scene we see in the beginning is MC "training" with Sylus after having been in his company for quite some time. He is not sneering at her foolish attempt to kill him but rather critiquing her mistakes when approaching her prey.
It could also explain 1) she has no weapons, 2) she's alone, 3) she attempts to strangle him bare-handed with one hand (girl pls 🤡), 4) she shows no fear or resistance when captured by Sylus, even as he comments on how easily she can be killed if he applies more pressure to her heart.
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Kind of similar to how in Zayne's Snow's Embrace myth, MC was training under Zayne's guidance for quite some time, and he would often give her lessons. I feel like this is a similar situation with Sylus being a mentor of some kind.
(Also, side note: she dresses similar as him??? Feels more draconic fashion than Philos, just saying. She might have been with him for even far longer than a few measly months.)
The mark he gives her could simply be just that. A bruise that serves as a time limit for her to develop her skill and show growth. He wants to see her progress, wants to see her become stronger, so this is could serve as a motivation device for her.
Now unlike with Zayne, Sylus is more upfront about his personal feelings, so we get intimate moments like these, where it leaves little room for doubts about their romance.
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We also have a memory (Secret Times, most likely, based on the others' past myth 4-star cards) of Sylus carrying MC in his arms as he flies (🎶 A whole new world~ 🎶)? They're also described as kindred spirits (a term Sylus would later echo in the main story during his first appearance). Shared thoughts and feelings? Perhaps bonding over their status as outcasts?
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Now, Sylus seems to be prophesied as bringing about Philos' downfall. Could...MC unwittingly have caused this? Could something have happened that led to Sylus going berserk and decimating Philos?
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I believe a "betrayal" (or assumed one, believed by Sylus) may have happened that led to their tragedy. I'm leaning more towards a tragic misunderstanding. I'll make a part 2 since I'm at my 10-pic cap on mobile 😔
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cavejebus · 2 days ago
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y'know saw 2004 has a lot of themes that have to do with lying and secrets n shit. specifically the bathroom trap. adam lies to lawrence enough for it to become noticable, lawrence keeps his secret about cheating on his wife, they both try to lie to the camera to pretend they completed the trap that one time... sure it ain't the main theme of the movie but i find it interesting.
it's like adam finds it easy to lie to others, while lawrence finds it easy to lie to himself (hence his whole "i did not cheat on her!!!" thing) so i like how those play off of eachother.
there also was a lot of trust that they needed to gain though, since adam needed to trust that lawrence wasn't gonna actually do what jigsaw said and shoot him.. you can sorta tell, the more adam lied to lawrence, the more lawrence was willing to break that trust.
it's visible in adam's face too, when he lies. his eyes dart to the side before answering lawrence, and he paused for a bit to think of what excuse to make up. those are pretty common cues that psychology studies notice when people lie, so props to leigh whannel for acting that effectively!!
but uh it all goes back to "i wouldn't lie to you." cuz like. lawrence you literally just did. you saying that was a lie 😭😭 it just kinda feels like they both trusted eachother, but really shouldn't have. in fact, i think adam would've survived if he had less faith in lawrence!!
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bull-at-the-gate · 2 days ago
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Sehkmet the Just. Devoted Paladin of The Lord of the North Wind; The Wyrmking; King of Good Dragons; The Platinum Dragon Bahamut
More silly Tavs. haha can we tell that I started out drawing animals and have for way longer than I’ve drawn people?
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Sehkmet’s an Oath of Vengeance Paladin and always keeps her word, or will die in the attempt.
I imagine she’s been resurrected once before after falling in battle against the cult of Tiamat.
She devoted her life to serving as an instrument for Bahamut’s vengeance after losing her clan to followers of Tiamat as a wee cub.
So she’s very devout, but also gets to be a whole himbo, as a treat. She and Hollow (my durge) would ask together with full earnestness ‘what animal is the pink panther’ and Sehkmet would probably forget after a week.
Some Headcanon-y Things
Heals by giving lil’ forehead kisses and will absolutely not tolerate anyone hiding injuries, she’s lost too many a good ally to let that slide.
Helps with cooking by prepping the food so Gale has a little less work to do; Can freeze food for later too
White Dragonborn are more adapt for the cold, so Sehkmet’s got a thick downy fur, ideal for cuddling; everyone has slept with at least once for the best platonic cuddles (maybe minus Lae’zel until much later)
Has no idea what a shirt is, not really, but she prefers to go without when resting. Only somewhat understands modesty, everything for Dragonborn is extremely internal so she understands in concept, but not necessarily for herself
Does laundry for everyone, finds the repetitiveness to be meditative and is particular about strong smells, so doing it is a win-win. Patches up any holes she finds too.
Fascinated by hair, loves to style it and learned how to when a few war clerics taught her to. Lae’zel, Shadowheart, and Gale all thought she was giving them *the look* but she just wanted to play with and style their hair.
I need to practice muscular bodies a bit, but she’s built like a seven-foot tall truck and hits like a train.
Can only see out of one eye, lost total use of her right one while training to join her order but the vision had been failing most of her life.
She was a secret fan of *The Blade of Frontiers* before meeting Wyll because she’d heard he also only had one functioning eye and was still able to be a champion of the people.
did not, however, realize she was older than him. She’s still a fan.
Spends at least one evenings each tenday polishing and caring for the party’s armor, after proving to Lae’zel she did an acceptable enough job to be entrusted hers as well.
Scarily fast, especially out of her armor. She was too slow, once, to save a cleric who’d trusted her to be their shield. She’d vowed to never be too slow again, and she always keeps her word.
Offers mercy and a second chance unless it’s been proven to her that a beaten enemy won’t do better; She follows Bahamut’s own words on the matter, no justice without mercy and no penance without forgiveness
Would probably be a theater kid
Spars with Lae’zel and Karlach on the regular in camp. I like the idea that Dragonborn can replace teeth but it’s not common knowledge yet, so it’s funny to picture:
Karlach knocking out a couple teeth and being extremely apologetic and starts looking for the teeth
Sehkmet’s just confused because she’s assumed her whole life everyone’s teeth regrow and is confused why Karlach’s dragging Shadowheart over with her old teeth asking if she can put them back.
Lae’zel is amused (Gith definitely would also be able to regrow teeth, selectively bred warrior race and all) and uses the moment for one of her lovely little Githyanki supremacy tangents.
Sehkmet is just standing there, staring at the horizon in concern, like ‘You all don’t regrow teeth?!’ and thinking about how many belated apologies she needs to make
Karlach is still holding bloody teeth
Lae’zel and Shadowheart are fighting (flirting) again
Astarion is over by the cookout bugging Gale and watching the show
Gale and Wyll are still thinking at least they’re normal
the Emperor is still imploring you to eat a tadpole.
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wihellib · 3 days ago
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Okay so I have played a few NSFW games before and I have to say one thing , SA is a very common theme in those (and it is almost always romanticized) . So I am not surprised that Satan's torture card was written in *that* way .
But I think the developers should have had mentioned that the card may contain disturbing topics .
I’m definitely not someone who thinks that SA/noncon should never be written about. I do read and consume content that has noncon featured heavily. But I go into that fully aware and consenting.
It would be nice if there was a button on the banner or NP that you could press and it would outline the general content of the card, so people can decide if that’s something they want to read or not. If that’s something they want to spend seals/money on or not. Or you could ignore the button if you’re fine with anything. Just having the option there would really help.
Numerous factors contributed to my dislike of Satan (Tortured), the noncon part just exaggerated the others.
Satan had the least amount of cards of any of the original four Kings. He had half the amount of Leviathan and Beelzebub. It had been eight months since Satan’s last card was released.
If there were a variety of Satan cards that we could choose from and enjoy, then one miss is not that big of a deal. But there’s not a lot of variety. There are very few Satan cards. So, when the card you’ve been waiting so long for is bad by a lot of people’s standards, then it amplifies the disappointment by a considerable amount.
Satan (Tortured) is even worse when you compare it to Leviathan (Tortured). Leviathan’s card didn’t include noncon in the same way Satan’s does. It had a much longer, better written story than Satan. Leviathan got a new sprite while Satan didn’t. Satan‘s secret club animations were very lacklustre. There was much more new lore/characters in Leviathan’s card than Satan’s. Without question, Leviathan had the superior card by far. It’s a bad look for PB to be so biased towards one character and the NP.
Satan was also just really dumb and OOC in this card. He saw a random angel with purple hair, thought it was us, and just followed them. Like what????? There’s also little reason that he shouldn’t have know that it was us in Gabriel’s body. We have a contract with him written on our soul, recognized by the Lemegeton. He should have recognized our soul. He should have realized it was us. But he didn’t because PB didn’t care about logic or characterization and just really wanted us to noncon Satan.
There are many reasons that I felt Satan’s new card was an extreme let down. It wasn’t just the noncon. The noncon was part of it, since it felt very mean-spirited towards a character that has been very good to us, but it definitely wasn’t the only reason.
If someone likes Satan (Tortured), then that’s completely fine. You do you. But it’s also completely fine that I, and many others, didn’t like it at all.
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the-universal-sun · 1 day ago
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On what age range does Stan regress? And also what type of agree gear does be use? Just politely asking as a fren :3
Yes! Thank you friend for the ask! There’s going to be more coming this way because I’ll have entirely too much time on my hands in the next few days! So please enjoy this too!
Can you guys tell what book I apparently really like?
I don’t think there’s a solid age he regresses down to, like consistently, I think it’s around the 2-5 mark, unless something happens or he’s feeling extremely distressed, then he regresses down younger. Which, in that case, means he HAS to have someone take care of him. Which is probably going to be Ford, he’s the only one he can really trust to care for him in the way he needs when he feels that young.
As for gear, it depends.
If Fiddleford is his caregiver (and even though this would be in the early 80s we are going to be anachronistic. This is fiction we can take liberties) then he’s getting at least one pacifier. Fidds probably made it for Stan so he doesn’t mess up his teeth even more, and he probably made it to have a cute little nickname spelled out. I like to think Fidds uses food/southern nicknames for Stanley when regressed, so think something like “Pumpkin” or “Junebug”. He does have his “Poindexter” plush that he’s had since he was 19, but Fidds does win him a really big Duck plush when the fair comes to Gravity Falls. He has some sippy cups because he has a tendency to tilt the cup all the way up and pour his drink all down his face and clothes. He really only has some footie pajamas for when it gets to be winter up there. It’s not easy to come by someone who will custom make clothes in gravity falls, especially nothing like the kind of clothes Stan wants. So he mostly settles for some softer clothing with fun designs and patterns. Nothing vibrant that’ll hurt his eyes. Sweats and grandma sweaters mostly. Fidds makes sure he has a lot of paper and coloring books with as many crayons and markers as he wants. He loves to color and draw. He also has some blocks, a lite brite for when the lights needs to be off so his eyes can rest, play doh, and fighting robots to name a few. He has a few story books that Fidds will read to him. Fidds wants to spoil him, but he knows that he can’t buy Stan everything he wants to, so he does what he can (for now…)
If Ford is his caregiver (we’re doing Grunkle Ford for now) then he is going to do his best to spoil Stan with all he wants as much as possible. From buying stuff online (the internet is marvelous!) to making/inventing it. Ford’s got Stan enough pacifiers stashed around the ship and later shack to have a different one every day. He’s getting Stan sippy cups of all kinds of patterns and designs. it’s easier than cups for him if he’s got dentures since he likes to take those out. He’s got one bottle for the times he’s feeling extra small. He’s got some nice and warm footie pajamas for when they’re in the Arctic, and some lighter ones for more general use-sometimes his brother just needs a lazy day where he can wear what’s basically pajamas. Those kinds of footies are going to be the kind that are animal themed with the ears and tails-Ford thinks they’re so cute. He’s also got some nautical themes pajama sets for the summers spent in Gravity Falls. That’s not even accounting for all the soft handmade sweaters Stan’s got from Mabel that he wears-his favorite having dinos on it-and the soft pants and shorts he feels more comfortable wearing now that his secrets out in the open. I’ve already mentioned Poindexter, that’s a staple for any kind of regressed Stanley, and I mentioned in a few posts Shanklin 2, the stuffed Opposum Ford gets Stan after finding out he’s barely got any Little stuff. He will give Stan all the toys he had back in Jersey and all the toys he’s ever wanted. Legos, blocks, slinkies, playdoh, etch n sketches, fighting robots, hard to break tea sets, coloring books, fancy crayons (This is art, it deserves the best!), anything Stan looks twice at really. He goes a bit overboard, but he’s just trying to make up for all the years he’s missed out on. Also Goodnight Moon, can’t forget that book. That’s Stan’s favorite out of the multitude of books Ford reads to him.
Now if it’s just Stan regressing by himself? He only allows himself the bare minimum. He has Poindexter, an old onesie he allowed himself to buy a few years beforehand, and old and worn pacifier, some crayons, coloring books, blank paper, Ford’s old coat that he likes to wrap around himself when he misses him, a sippy cup, and Goodnight Moon. He feels guilty letting himself indulge. He feels ashamed to be acting like that, a child, to be needing his paci and sippy cup, even in the privacy of his own home, even though he can’t help it. So without anyone there to tell him it’s okay, he doesn’t allow himself to indulge or to spoil himself like he is when he’s being taken care of.
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baronessvonglitter · 1 day ago
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Cherry, Cherry 🍒 Chapter 20 🍒
"Baby Loves Me"
Joel Miller x f!Reader
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Word count: 8,823 (she's a big'un)
Summary: A blizzard, a wedding, family secrets, and two people who can't stop thinking about each other. Are these fateful events going to drive you apart for good, or bring you even closer together?
(Warnings contain spoilers beneath the cut)
WARNINGS: 18+ Only! Mature and Explicit, age gap (reader is 39, Joel is 56), takes place a few days before Christmas 2023, mention of eating food/drinking alcohol, mention of health issues, oral (m & f receiving), Ellie has anger issues, use of guns for recreational shooting, jealous!Joel, mutual pining, reader wears makeup and dresses, unprotected piv, creampie, TW for minor heart attack and hospitalization (everything is okay in the end), getting back together and having a happily ever after. In this universe everyone is alive and happy.
Author's Note: this series was the first story I ever posted on AO3 and then recently here on tumblr. I had no idea so many people would love it, and it's currently my most liked, most commented-on, and most bookmarked work on AO3 ♥️ It feels so good to finally have this complete, but I will write some one-shots about this couple in the future, because part of me really doesn't want to let them go. Much love to those who stuck around and showed their support while I got this story hammered out. I love and appreciate all of you!
Please enjoy this playlist for your listening pleasure, songs that either appear in the series or provided inspiration
Series Masterlist
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It's early when Joel wakes, sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of the bed as he puts his hand to his heart, eyes scrunched closed tight as he prepares himself for the increasingly painful palpitations. He grunts in suffering at the agony of the erratic pounding of his heart, body tense until it passes, and he sighs with relief, head in his hands as he runs his fingers through his greying locks.
It's been almost a week now that he's had these pains, happening every day now that Sarah's wedding day is nearing. He gets them on and off but lately stress has been catching up to him and reminding him he's not in his thirties anymore. Hell, he'd give anything just to be in his forties again.
He gets up to get a glass of water, quickly throwing on a shirt before going downstairs. The house is quiet though he can see the electric glow of the television light on underneath yours and Ellie's rooms. He hesitates just outside of your room, putting an ear to the door, hoping to catch some tidbit of your voice, some clue as to what you're doing in there, but it's quiet, just the low volume of something playing on TV.
With a sigh he goes down to the kitchen.
Alone with his thoughts, affected by the presence of you and Ellie under his own roof, he takes stock of his life, of all the moments he failed you when he should have been there for you.
That first night he set foot back in Austin after serving time in the Bexar County jail, wondering if he should call you, he'd gone instead to a bar and met Hailey. He didn't recognize her at first, but she'd come on so strong, and the alcohol ran freely that night, so by the time he'd taken her home and her warm, tight little mouth was wrapped around his cock, it was too late. He didn't expect that that one night would lead to her wanting more, but by then you were gone, tucked back safely away in Houston where he couldn't get his hands on you and where you could (he'd hoped) in time forget about him. You were too much of a good girl with too much potential to waste it on someone like him. Hailey was someone who was always going to be stuck in a small town, so he didn't have to worry he was holding her back. But he soon came to realize that all they had between them was fucking. Not that he'd ever minded it in the past, but after having you, experiencing what real love was like, what Hailey offered felt like a cheap replacement, and he just wasn't that man anymore. He knew Sarah hated her, so when he caught Hailey stealing from him he knew that was the last straw and ended things.
Sad to say he went back to his usual routine from before he met you. Working from sunup to sundown, coming home with new aches in his joints to a meal Sarah had had to cook herself, or pizza that had gone cold. On the weekends he'd be at the bar, either with Tommy or more often alone, and he'd find a woman and wind up at her place. He could never bring them back to his, not in his bed that he shared with you.
Seeing you in New Orleans that summer night had been a shock to his system. He thought he'd managed to get over you just a little, but seeing you, a little older than the last time, looking soft and happy and bright-eyed as you laughed with Tommy.. and that fucking rock on your finger that signaled you were taken. Something primeval in him stirred when he ran into you in that restroom hallway, your lips full and glossy from making out with his brother, jealousy surging through him that you'd be so willing to cheat on your husband-to-be with someone other than himself.. it led him to want you more than he'd ever wanted anything in his life.
Leaving you the next day had been the hardest thing, but he had to remind himself you were going to belong to another. He couldn't get in the way of that, not when he'd only shown his love for you by fucking you in a bar restroom. You were going to marry a military man and have a respectable life, that was what he wanted for you. To have a life with Joel would only make you sordid, ripe for gossip. He was old enough to be your father and you were in fact his his best friend's daughter. He couldn't sully your life with his mistakes.
On a last minute whim he'd come to your wedding, sat at the very back as you were oblivious to him, staring into your husband's eyes as you spoke your vows, each word a piece of jagged glass in his heart. He'd left before you could see him, driving back to Texas at a high rate of speed, gripping the steering wheel with white knuckles. Why hadn't he just objected? He could have done it, raised his hand and told the entire congregation that you were his god damn it. He would have led you out, carrying you bridal style, ripped your damn dress off you and fucked you senseless.
It was later that Tommy suggested the dating app. Joel wasn't a fan of technology, and in fact still had his old Nokia phone that Sarah was warning him was becoming obsolete and cajoled him into upgrading to a smartphone. Once she and Tommy had helped him with setting up a profile on eHarmony, the requests piled in. Women from all over the state showed their interest. He had his pick of almost anyone. While he went on a few fruitless dates (some of which actually ended up in sex) there were few that actually interested him.
Until Tess. She was so much like him, and more suited to his age. A divorcee, she knew what she wanted in a relationship and stuck by her values. Beneath her tough exterior Joel found she was actually very kindhearted, even sweet. She cared about animals, liked beer, and was a homebody. She'd resisted his charms at first, but eventually neither could give in to the spark they felt. It took some convincing to get her to marry him. She accepted only on the terms that he move to Boston. She'd visited Texas a few times on business, but she wanted to stay in the northeast, and Joel, in love again for the first time in years, acquiesced.
The problem was they were too much alike. Both wanted to lead, and while he was happy to let Tess have the reigns now and then, it became an issue. This led to more arguments, tense discussions over things that shouldn't have mattered. The divorce, when it finally happened, was a blessing in disguise. Joel followed Tommy away from Boston and found comfort here in Wyoming, in a place he could start anew.
Sarah had been none too subtle when she brought you up in conversation. "Did you know she's a teacher?" "She's single now, divorced actually." "She's in California with her daughter."
Every damn day there was a phone call or a text where you were mentioned. And now, with you here under his roof at Sarah's behest, it was apparent that she was trying to get you two back together again.
He knew he needed to speak with you about that comment you uttered, about "our" daughter Ellie. He'd done the math in his head, just to be safe, and had calculated that he could indeed be her dad. But he had to get the honest answer from you.
It'd be easy if you would at least acknowledge his presence.
Your cold shoulder is more like an arctic icy blast. Your refusal to even meet his eye is like an arrow through his heart. He wishes that you would at least glare at him, or say something sarcastic or hurtful, but your silence is the coldest thing, even with the blizzard outside.
He's hopeful during one moment the next morning, as he's going into the hall restroom while you're coming out. Freshly showered, you're wearing a towel around your body, skin glowing, hair combed back and damp. The steam that surrounds you from your hot shower makes you look like a figure from a movie, an ethereal angel come to earth. His breath catches in his throat as you look up at him, your beautiful eyes wide and plush lips parted. Then you resume your coldness, pulling your towel tighter around you as you go to your room. When he steps in he smells the jasmine aroma of your body wash still in the air around him his dick hardens in response.
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Hearing that Sofia has arrived is the one bright spot in your time here.
You meet her at the Tipsy Bison after everyone has helped out shoveling snow off the path. You'd found yourself working next to Joel and said nothing to him, ignoring his silent appeal for you to talk to him.
Now the crew is indulging in some food and beer at the bar while you catch up with your cousin.
"How did you get in? I thought the roads were impassable," you tell her after a big hug and an introduction to her fiancee Ruby. It had come as a surprise to you when she'd told you she was marrying a woman, but Sofia had said she'd only followed her heart and didn't consider herself stuck to any sort of label. Ruby was the perfect person for her and there was no looking back.
"Tommy sent a pilot friend of his to pick us up from the airport when our taxi couldn't make it through the snow," she says, nearly knocked over as Ellie pummels her with a bear hug. "We were helicoptered in, like a couple of VIPs."
It's like old times as you share a booth altogether, different kinds of appetizers in the center of the table as you catch up on things.
"How did you manage to still stay friends with Tommy?" you ask when Ruby and Ellie go to make change for the jukebox. Hearing that Sofia is staying with Tommy and Maria during their visit, you can't help but wonder how other people can so easily put aside the past.
"I think it helped that we were friends before we started dating," she shrugs. "And.. to be honest, our relationship never got that serious. Not like you and Joel," she finishes in a whisper, darting a glance at the elder Miller brother, who's knocking back some beer with Tommy and a few others.
"Why do you ask?" Sofia continues.
"I don't know how to deal with being under the same roof as Joel," you admit. "Everything that he put me through.. I know we're only here for a few days but it feels like an eternity. It's becoming harder to avoid him."
"You should talk to him," she says gently. "You don't have to be best friends or anything, but you're a friend of the bride. You should at least be civil."
You sneak a look over your shoulder at him, just to find he's already staring at you. You quickly turn away.
"Does he know about.." Sofia motions with her head toward Ellie, who's at the jukebox with Ruby.
"No," you respond. "And he doesn't need to know."
"That's not fair to him," she softly scolds you.
"You are the only one I've trusted with this, Sofia. Please do not make me regret telling you."
Sofia is really the only family you have left. You never saw you father after that fateful night when Joel fought him, and your mother disowned Ellie when she came out, causing you to disown your mother in return. Your circle is small but faithful.
She backs off. "All right," she relents. "But what about Ellie? She'll resent you for keeping this a secret this long."
You watch your daughter, who's drifted from the jukebox to one of the pool tables, mindlessly spinning the cue ball upon the soft green surface. She's distracted when she sees another girl across the room, a pretty dark-haired girl around her own age, watching Ellie furtively, as if fascinated.
"What the fuck are you looking at?" Ellie shouts, causing the girl to run away.
"Ellie!" you snap at her, and to your astonishment Joel walks past you to go to her. You freeze, watching their interaction, but all seems to be okay as they talk quietly.
"I don't know what to do for her. I don't know how to help her.. she's so angry, especially since the divorce. And Justin rarely ever sees her. The only thing he's good for is the child support." You swig your beer, itching to go and talk to her, but the stubborn side of you refuses to be closer to Joel than is necessary.
Sofia folds her napkin in sections. "She called me and told me about Riley.. and the little mishap at the mall."
Earlier that year, Ellie and Riley had been picked up by the cops for trespassing in an abandoned mall and vandalizing some stores. It was completely unlike her, and even though you both sought family therapy for all the issues you were going through, it didn't seem to be making much leeway.
"She doesn't seem so angry now," Sofia mentions, and you turn to see Joel and Ellie starting a game of pool. You both watch as she tries to pull off complicated trick shots and Joel just shakes his head in feigned frustration. Once again your gaze lingers too long and you lock eyes, but this time you offer a tiny smile, mouthing 'thanks.'
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"Hey Mom, can I go with Joel and Finn? Joel said I have to ask you."
You look up from where you're steam-cleaning your dress for the rehearsal dinner tonight. "Where are you going?"
"It's near the woods on Joel's property. We're just going for a hike," she shrugs.
"I guess.. just behave yourself, okay?"
She grins, glad to have gotten permission. You follow her down to the foyer where Joel and Finn are getting their hats and gloves on. "Be careful," you tell them, though it's mostly meant for Joel.
"Of course. You're okay with her shootin'?"
"What?!"
Ellie manages to look chagrined. "I didn't think you'd let me go if you knew guns would be involved."
"Well you thought right!"
"I won't let her if you won't allow it," Joel offers.
"Come on!" Ellie groans.
"Just remember that you're on thin ice back home," you tell her without wanting to let on to the others about Ellie's troubled past.
"Somethin' the matter?" Joel asks, eyes darting between you and her.
"Nope," Ellie's all smiles when you hesitate to answer. "Let's get going!"
She and Finn race out the door into the snowy yard just as Joel stops for a brief moment. "I won't let her shoot if you don't want her to," he says solemnly.
The nearness of him, the rich baritone of his voice could easily bring you to your knees. It feels like a chore just to swallow that emotion and consider it dead, a mistake.
"Just be careful," you repeat, a smile flitting on your lips. Heat rises in your face when you see his gaze drop down to your mouth, his tongue peeking out to swipe across his own lips.
"You could come with us."
Your first instinct is to refuse, to keep that wall built between him and yourself. Good fences make good neighbors and brick walls keep people from reliving past trauma.
But damn it's hard to say no when he's here right in front of you, after all this time, and the parts of you that have healed just want to give in, to go into his arms again.
It's not a surprise when you're in the passenger seat of his truck, like old times. And though it's a newer model and the seats have warmers and the upholstery makes the whole car smell like it was just driven off the lot, in a way it still feels like summer 2003.
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Finn's done this before, the apple of his grandfather's eye. Even with the skill of a child, he shoots with ease, knocking down most of the targets Joel had set up on a fence.
When it's Ellie's turn she's eager for the gun, but her practice shots are haphazard: off an old fallen tree, a random snowbank. She huffs in frustration.
"Wide right," Joel tells her. "You're flinchin'."
Ellie shakes her head. "The target's too small."
"I made it bigger than I should've. Eject the cartridge."
You watch your only child move with precision, handling the gun with ease despite being new to this. "I'm not flinching, the rifle just sucks."
You and Finn exchange a look, suppressing your laughter.
"Okay, give it." Joel changes places with Ellie, who quips, "It doesn't aim right, you'll see."
It's hard to tear your eyes from him as he sets up, moving with the ease of someone half his age. "A deep breath in, slow breath out. You squeeze the trigger like you love it," he says, ignoring Ellie's teasing remarks. "Gentle, steady, nice and slow."
"You gonna shoot this thing or get it pregnant?" she smirks, and when you laugh out loud Joel shakes his head, pulling off the perfect shot.
After, you rest on the tailgate of the truck while drinking warm beverages from your thermoses. Ellie and Finn gather their energy quickly enough, playing in the snow and chasing each other. It brightens your day to see your daughter smiling.
"I wanna apologize for the other day," Joel says, his eyes flicking to you. "I was outta line. I've apologized to Ellie too. I think she and I are good now."
You nod, somewhat relieved that he'd brought it up first. "I'm sorry too. I guess I get pretty riled up when someone tries to out-parent me."
Joel looks away, towards the mountains that peak their grayness against the clear blue sky. "He been outta the picture long?"
"Who? Justin?" You notice Joel winces at your ex husband's name. "Long enough. He was supposed to spend time with her for Christmas but chose his new wife over his own daughter. She didn't take it very well."
"Fuckin' bastard," he mutters. "Always figured there was a reason for me to not like him."
You give him a strange look. "You didn't know him."
"Didn't need to. He took you away from me. That's reason enough."
"Joel," you say quietly, both a scolding and a scoff. You remember his body against yours that night, the way your sheets bore his scent until the day before Justin came back from out of town and you had to wash away the evidence of your betrayal.
"I'm sorry I didn't go after you. There were a million opportunities and I failed each time."
You say his name again, with softness this time, your hand finding his, his palm almost completely dwarfing yours. You think about his fingers inside you, teasing you for the first time, showing you how to open up to him, and how you ended up giving away your whole heart.
In the moment where you can say the most heartwarming or romantic or even angry thing, what comes out of your mouth is: "You never accepted my friend request."
Joel looks puzzled. "What?"
"My friend request. On Facebook. I tried to add you but you never accepted it, so I canceled it." Cringing at your own words, how needy they sound, you take your hand from his, but he traps it within his own again.
"Darlin', I never look at that stuff. I only got one 'cause everyone else goaded me into it." His eyes look mirthful as he sees your doleful eyes.
"And that's how I found out about Tess.."
"Oh." The mirthful look is gone, replaced by a dark, blank look. The first marriage, the only marriage he ever had, so late in life, ended.
"What was she like?"
"Why do you wanna know?" He looks at the ground, as if the snow is so interesting. "What was that idiot fuckboy husband of yours like?"
You almost laugh, surprised that he's jealous, even after you've moved on from your marriage.
"He wasn't as great as I thought," you shrug. "But that doesn't matter now."
Joel smiles, agreeing. "Tess was.. we were good for awhile but you're right, doesn't matter now."
"Because we both turned out okay.. me and you."
He thinks it over a bit, eventually nodding. "Yeah.." His deep brown eyes meet yours, and you catch a glimmer of the man he was before, twenty years past, a single dad with a teenage girl and an interest in the new girl next door. "I'm sorry.. for everything. We happened so fast that my brain had to catch up with my heart."
You're afraid that if you think about it for too long you'll cry and never stop. "We don't have to talk about that.."
He nods, looking a little sad that you declined. "You're right, we don't."
"Look at you with all this land," you smile, gently teasing him to change the subject. "What are you gonna do with all of it?"
Joel shrugs, looking at his property, thinking again of the possibilities. "I might decide to turn it into a ranch, raise sheep," he shrugs. "They're quiet and do what they're told."
He's quiet another moment, before his voice drops an octave. "I'm really glad you came, babygirl.. it's really good to see you. Don't think I said that before."
A smile graces your lips, a genuine one, and the warmth of his words melts what's left of your defenses. "Joel.. there's something I need to tell you.. about Ellie.." The words are out before you even think.
Your heart pounds, taking residence in your throat as if to keep the truth from spilling out. Joel turns his whole body to you. His eyes search yours, without question or condemnation, as if he's willing you to say it because he already knows, because he just wants it made real.
When the moment passes it's a disappointment to both of you. It's getting later in the afternoon and you still need to get ready for tonight. The kids trudge back to the truck and you get in next to Joel in the front. There's a quietness that fills the space, thick and somewhat desperate.
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The Tipsy Bison has gone through another temporary makeover for the rehearsal dinner: garlands of lights arch across the ceiling from beam to beam, creating a pleasant, dreamy atmosphere. People mill around waiting for the bride and groom who are running a little late. Drinks are served and tables of food boast different kinds of cuisine.
Ellie makes a beeline for the hors d'oevres, immediately picking out what she wants and stuffing it straight into her mouth as if she hasn't seen food in months. Joel watches her from the next table over, trying hard as hell not to call her out too harshly, but as his stomach growls he joins her in the hunt for sustenance.
A tray of pastel-colored macarons catches Ellie's eye and she takes a light green treat with her fingers. "What are these?" She scrutinizes it, taking a quick sniff.
"It's some kinda cookie.. or something.. how the hell should I know?" he grumbles.
"Pistachio," she grunts in disgust, putting it back on the plate.
"Well, now don't put it back, you've already touched it and sniffed it and everything.." Joel quickly pops the discarded macaron into his mouth.
"If you want 'em they're all yours," she says, giving his shoulder a couple heavy claps before moving on down the line of food.
He just shakes his head, looking around for you for the tenth time tonight, finding you with Sarah and her soon-to-be inlaws at the bar. His mouth goes dry at the sight of you in a dark red dress, long-sleeved, cinched at the waist, and he feels a familiar rush of blood to his cock as he eyes the thigh-length slit on one side of the skirt.
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"That color is sensational on you."
You turn to the voice you've just heard, as the group you were talking with disperses.
"Hi," you tell the older, well-dressed man in front of you. "I don't believe we've met." But then it hits you, and just as he introduces himself you realize you already know his name.
"I'm Frank," he says, a Duchenne smile lighting up his features and crinkling the wrinkles around his eyes. He's handsome, and very friendly. And he was friends with Joel during his marriage to Tess.
He introduces you to his husband Bill, who regards you with a certain suspicion and gives a gruff acknowledgement to your hello. "He's like that with everyone," Franks explains in a stage whisper, while rolling his eyes. "He's just a big grump, but I love him."
"I'm a friend of the bride," you tell them after giving your name, and also introducing Ellie, who's arrived next to you with a plate piled high with shrimp, pulled pork sliders, and mini cheesecakes.
"She's a friend of Joel's," Frank tells Bill, as if to clarify.
"Um, yes.. I'm also a friend of his," you agree. Pretending to spot someone across the room, you excuse yourself, giving a subtle motion for Ellie to follow you, but she stays where she is, popping a whole shrimp in her mouth, eyeing the couple.
"There's a story there," Frank says enticingly as he sips his beer.
"What do you mean?" she asks, curious about the gossip.
Bill gives him a look and shakes his head. "She's a kid, she doesn't need your dramatic stories."
"Now I have to know!" Ellie insists.
Frank feigns annoyance. "Oh all right."
He weaves the tale of Joel and his wife Tess: happily married at first, so alike in attitude and hobbies. She thought she knew everything about the man she married, but when Tommy, in a drunken game of poker one night, recalled a certain young woman who Joel knew, a woman who could tie a knot in a cherry stem with her tongue, Joel told his brother, in a similar drunken state, that he remembered her fondly, missed her like crazy, she was the one who got away.
Tess wasn't the type to hound someone for details, but she didn't like there was a part of Joel's past that she didn't know about. Especially if that past was filled with him falling in love with and screwing a college girl. This naturally led to arguments that Tess refused to drop. Joel didn't want to relive that time with you, and insisted it meant nothing since you were well and truly out of his life.
But the damage had been done, and the thorn of jealousy had pierced Tess's heart. You were a stranger to her and still could not be defeated.
Frank recalled with suppressed glee the night Tess had stormed out on a dinner party, ranting at Joel about "not being able to get over a stupid ass teenager" and causing a scene for the others to eat up. It had embarrassed Joel deeply, but when news of Sarah's wedding had become known, Joel couldn't keep it secret from the friends of his ex-wife. He'd come to like them in his own way, especially Bill, with whom he shared a predilection for quiet and keeping to one's self. They hunted and fished like old times and soon enough both he and Frank were invited to the wedding.
"There's a saying that goes," Frank is telling Ellie, "'everyone can see it but them.'"
Ellie glances at you across the room, and then at Joel. You and he trade silent, surreptitious glances at one another, filled with longing. You glance at him and he catches you before you glance away, and vice versa. The signal between your gazes is irrefutable. There's something there, has been all this time. All it needed was a little meddling from Sarah to bring the spark back to life.
For the first time Ellie sees you as something more than her mother. She realizes you had a past, a life before she was born, and a fraction of that life was spent in love with a man she just met a couple days ago.
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"Hey Mom, can you help?"
Hearing Ellie, you immediately shift into Mom Mode, stopping your own get-ready routine to assist her. She's in your doorway, holding out her wrists. She picked out the suit herself, but the cufflinks are something new.
"Did you get these from your dad?"
"Joel let me borrow them for today."
It's finally the day of the wedding, and as the ceremony isn't until the evening, the whole house is a kind of organized chaos from morning through the afternoon. As if your nerves weren't already on fire, Sarah had approached you early that morning (fortunately for her while you were drinking your coffee) and asked if you'd replace one of her bridesmaids who'd come down with a cold overnight and couldn't attend.
You'd reasoned with her that you didn't have a bridesmaid dress, but that was easily solved when it was revealed the bridesmaids were all wearing jewel tones, and the sapphire gown you'd purchased off the rack would do just fine.
You had anticipated being part of a crowd. Now you'd be at the front of the congregation, all eyes on you, especially Joel's.
Shaking yourself from your thoughts, you finish helping Ellie with her cufflinks and let her entertain you with whatever teenage thought is flipping around in her brain while you touch up your makeup.
"I'm supposed to meet with Sarah and the bridal party at the church. You can ride with me or you'll have to find a ride with someone else."
"Joel will take me."
You brush away some stray powder on your cheek. "Are you sure?"
"Maybe he could take both of us. Want me to ask him?"
"No--"
But she's gone before you can stop her.
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You feel Joel's eyes on you as you during the short drive to the church, and you blame the heat you feel coursing through your body on the seat warmer.
"It's a nice thing you're doin' for Sarah, steppin' in at the last minute," he says, eyes finally on the road.
"I can't let down a bride in need," you say somewhat cheerfully. "She'd do the same for me."
"Maybe at your next wedding." Ellie pipes up from the backseat, and Joel's frown is not lost on you.
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The lead-up to the actual ceremony is a blur, as it was at your own wedding fifteen years before. The bridal party clusters around Sarah, who looks radiant, as she promises she isn't nervous. You can sense her agitation in the way her knee bounces as she's seated, one of the bridesmaids doing a last minute touch up to her hair. The air is heavy with excitement, the scent of hair spray and perfume all around you, reminding you that you're flammable.
"Remember this day," you advise her, and she looks up at you with a grateful smile. "It goes by unbelievably fast."
You wonder if you'll ever have this again, the butterflies in your stomach as you wait for the moment when you see your man at the aisle, awaiting you. You were lucky to have it once. Twice would be an anomaly, considering you haven't had a real relationship in so long.
Joel knocks and, granted entrance, the bridesmaids flutter about, getting ready for their entrance into the church. The bride and her father are left alone, no doubt exchanging words of love before he gives her away to her true love.
You had no one to walk down the aisle with when you were a bride, and the memory threatens to cloud your mind as you take your small bouquet of white roses and camellias. "Canon in D" starts, and the line makes its way down the aisle, towards the altar where Theo and his groomsmen wait.
Situated at the altar, the congregation rises as the music changes, and Sarah walks in, arm in arm with Joel.
Your eyes are on him the entire time, and your heart feels to big to fit in your chest. You've never seen Joel in a suit, but this one is perfectly tailored to his broad, strong physique. His hair is perfectly styled, his grey visible through the curls you long to run your fingers through.
When Sarah and Theo exchange vows your gaze unexpectedly meet Joel's and this time neither of you look away. You catch the glimmer of a tear falling down his cheek, which he does not wipe away. The bride and groom's words seem to ring loud and true: a promise of love through hard times and illness; of love that only grows in each others' absence; of love that does not die even after death.
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The reception is held at the Tipsy Bison, and you marvel at how it's managed to disguise itself once more from a saloon to an elegant wedding atmosphere. A lot of money has gone into the week's events, and you know it's all Joel's doing. He's giving away his daughter, sending her off in style, giving her a day she'll remember forever.
You watch Sarah and Joel during their father-daughter dance, a tradition you didn't get to have yourself. "I Loved Her First" by Heartland starts up by the band onstage, and it tugs on your heartstrings to watch them. In the back of your mind you see them, Joel still thirty-six and Sarah still fourteen. By the time Sarah and Theo have their first dance as husband and wife you're already in the ladies' room, splashing cold water on your face so no one can see you've been crying.
Later, the bridesmaids and groomsmen have scattered, dancing or drinking at the bar, mingling. You stay at your seat at the now nearly-empty wedding party table, fingers twirling the stem of your champagne glass.
Mired in your own thoughts, you don't realize Joel has approached, crouching next to you.
"Dance with me?" he asks, his voice nearly a rasp with how nervous he is.
Wordlessly you take his hand, which practically dwarfs your own, as he leads you to the dance floor. You fall into a rhythm as the band starts up "Tennessee Whiskey", swaying softly to the music. His right hand rests on your lower back, gently guiding you. Your heart pounds as you gaze into his eyes. You haven't been this close to him since the night you conceived Ellie, the fateful night that threw a wrench into all your plans.
"It was a beautiful wedding," you lean in close to be heard over the music.
Joel shivers at your proximity, the brush of your lips against his ear, and he pulls you a little closer. "I'm happy you came all this way for it. You didn't have to."
"I wanted to," you affirm, your hand gliding up to his shoulder.
The air is thick with tension, much like in the days you'd first met. You have to turn away or risk your feelings made known to everyone here.
Ellie's at one of the booths with the dark-haired girl from a couple days ago, watching something on her phone. As the girl laughs you see Ellie looking at her with a warmth you haven't known her capable of for anyone else.
"She's going to hate me for having to take her away again.." you tell him. "I haven't seen her this happy in a long time."
He clears his throat. "Maybe now she has a reason to return." He nods towards Ellie and her new friend.
Your limbs stiffen a little in response. You're not yet ready to think about the future, the possibilities it holds. You've barely begun to mend your friendship with Joel.
"Maybe," you relent, quietly, a promise made in the ether.
Joel's silent as the music moves smoothly in the air between you. His grip tightens on your body as he asks, "She's mine, ain't she?"
You snap from your thoughts, your heart in your throat as you stop dancing. "Excuse me?" Your eyes bore into him, daring him to speak the truth for himself.
"The other day you said 'our daughter'.. the timeline's right, I'm not that bad at math," he manages a smile.
"Joel, I.." you shake your head. "It's all too much. I can't think about this right now."
"Just tell me the truth," he says quietly.
"What would it matter if she was?"
"It'd make a whole hell of a difference. Two daughters, two Miller girls. Don't you think somethin' like that would make me happy?"
For a rare moment you let yourself think about the day your mother came to get you, pull you back home to Houston seeped in shame and regret. She'd lied and manipulated facts to get you on her side. You vowed you'd never be like her or put Ellie through that.
"Yes, Joel.." you whisper. "She's yours.."
The joy that shines in his eyes is like nothing you've ever seen before. When his arms wrap around you your lips find his as if twenty years has never passed between you. Right there, in the middle of the dance floor, you're making out like teenagers.
"I want you," he growls.
"Let's get out of here," you agree.
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You're barely through the front door of his home when he presses you to the wall, his mouth hungry for yours. You hadn't thought you'd experience this level of passion again, but time has not diminished it for either of you.
"Joel," you moan as he presses himself to you, the blunt hardness of his erection teasing you. "Fuck me, Joel.."
He groans at your words, body aching with desire as he goes to his knees in front of you, lifting the hem of your dress. He presses messy kisses along your thighs while his hands roam over your hips and ass, his breath hot against your skin as he approaches the spot he most wants to taste again.
"Been too long, darlin'," he murmurs as he pulls your lacy underwear down your legs. "Been too damn long since I had you like this."
You kick your panties off, hooking one leg over his shoulder as he dives in, tongue lapping at your sweet pussy like a thirsty man finally finding water.
He stays there, tongue dancing between your folds and then tickling your clit, tasting you so deeply that you cry out, head falling back, body arched towards him, fingers tangled in his hair. Joel feasts like a man starved, slurping you up, inhaling your scent that surrounds him. There's nothing about you that's changed. You're still so sensitive to his touch, responsive to his lips, tongue, and now fingers pressed deep inside, finding the spot that makes you scream while his lips purse around your throbbing clit.
He doesn't stop after you come. He feasts on you over and over again, making up for lost time, pleading for your forgiveness this way, literally on his knees until you scream his name, convulsing around his fingers, your honey collecting on his large digits. Only when you feel completely boneless does he remove them gently, licking up your syrupy taste.
Joel picks you up, your dress falling back in to place as he carries you bridal style up to his room.
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All roads have led back to him. No matter where you went, no matter who you chose, Joel was always going to be there at the end of the path, your guiding light, even when you thought you hated him and when you thought he would never choose you again.
Even now, his body over yours, he's the missing piece of the puzzle. He teases you with his cock until you beg him to just put it in, to make you whole again. The glorious slide of his flesh into yours causes you both to gasp and your bodies still for a moment, taking in the significance of this act which you've done so many times before.
He's older now, but his vigor is not gone. He fucks you gently at first, then with impatience, as if he's afraid you'll dissolve like a dream in daylight. You'd know the feel of his cock among any other, the smooth outline and the ridges, the way he's molded his perfect shape into you, marked you years ago when you were a virgin, as if leaving his initials inside you. Mine.
You've never had a man to match him, never had someone so in sync with your body. He knows all your buttons, every dip and valley that his hand caresses. He's mapped out your skin like a cartographer, claiming the land in his own name.
You come almost too quickly the first time, before he flips you on top of him, gripping your hips as you ride him. "Love you," you moan as you come close to the edge again, heart and soul flying ahead of you into the bliss you've only really known with him.
Beneath you Joel's eyes go wide when you come, his hips lifting up into you, warmth spilling into your core.
"Babygirl," he whispers, a choked grunt as he turns pale, his skin clammy and sweaty when he loses consciousness.
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As soon as Sarah and Ellie arrive at the hospital you hug them, overcome with worry for Joel's medical emergency.
"How is he?" Sarah asks, still in her wedding dress. Even in the emergency waiting room she's generating a lot of interested looks her way.
"They just took him in a few minutes ago," you tell her, secretly glad she wasn't there to see her dad in such shape. "I think it was a heart attack.."
"Oh my god," she puts her hand over her mouth and sits on the nearest chair, Ellie right next to her, comforting her.
"The party's winding down at the bar," Ellie explains. "Only a few people know-- Theo, Tommy, Maria.."
"We didn't want to worry anyone else," Sarah adds.
You look at her, heart aching. This is supposed to be her special day.. and if something happens to Joel--
Don't think like that.
The three of you sit down, drinking stale coffee from the machine down the hall. Soon Tommy joins you, Theo staying at the house to keep an eye on Finn.
The worst thoughts poke through your brain, teasing you and taunting you. But at last the doctor comes out, a guy even younger than yourself, green scrubs and white coat.
He talks with the family, letting them know the diagnosis. "It was a silent myocardial infarction, basically a mild heart attack," he explains it. "He's going to be fine and he's resting right now."
"A heart attack?" Tommy and Sarah exclaim together.
"At his age it's not uncommon.. he's fifty-six years old," the doctor checks the chart. "Now, we have him on some aspirin and beta-blockers. Tests show he doesn't have enough blockage to necessitate surgery, but he'll need blood pressure medication and to keep a healthier lifestyle."
"Can we see him?" you ask.
"Yes, two at a time, preferably. We want to keep him calm while we're monitoring him." He checks the chart again and looks at you. "You brought him in, correct, ma'am?"
"Yes.. why?"
"What was Mr. Miller doing before he exhibited symptoms of his coronary event?"
"Um.. what?" you pretend not to understand.
"What was he doing before he had his heart attack?"
"Mild heart attack," Tommy emphasizes.
"Well.." you race to think of what to tell him.
"I take it you were celebrating a wedding," the doctor says, seeing Sarah in her dress and the rest of you in tuxes and gowns and whispers a 'Congratulations' to her.
"Yes. Well, we danced.." you answer, and the doctor keeps his eyes on you as if he knows you're lying.
You go up to him, giving a subtle whisper. "We were.. intimate--"
"Sexual relations," he nods, writing it on the chart. "It's important for us to know what was a causing factor in his event. Now, two at a time can visit him."
Tommy and Sarah go first. He gives you a sly wink. "Y'all were fuckin'!" he teases, passing by. Sarah gives you an excited smile, to which you just purse your lips.
It's quiet but for the bag of Lays Ellie has opened, eating the chips slowly. "So you and Joel?"
You nod.
"But not just tonight.. a long time ago, right?"
There's an odd sensation in your stomach, as if the unspoken truth is fluttering around inside, beating its wings as it tries to find a way out. "I guess there's a lot I need to tell you. But only when you're ready."
Ellie seems to steel herself for whatever conversation is on the way, nodding at last, crumpling up the bag and tossing it in the bin. "Ready."
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Seeing Joel in the hospital bed is a sobering visual. Years ago your age gap represented something illicit, scandalous. Now you're reminded that no matter what road you and he take from here, you will most likely outlive Joel Miller.
He's awake when you and Ellie go in. It's obvious he doesn't like being here, but in his current state is not fit to complain.
"Hey," you say softly, going to his side. "How are you feeling?" You caress his cheek with the back of your hand.
Joel's eyes close at your delicate touch, and when he opens them there's a warmth in them that can't be denied. "I've been better, babygirl," he says. "But I'm damn glad you're here."
He glances at Ellie, seated in a chair on his other side. "And how about you, kiddo? You okay?"
"Am I okay?" she says incredulously. "Dude, I'm not the one in a hospital bed." But her face clearly shows relief that Joel's all right. You also see her brain working over everything you've told her (well, the gist of it.. there are some things she doesn't need to know).
"I was so worried," you tell him, your voice soft and warm, all your feelings coming to the forefront. "I thought I was gonna lose you."
Tears appear in Joel's eyes, which he brushes away impatiently. "You ain't losin' me yet, baby. Not for a long time, not if you don't want to."
"Joel.." you whisper. "Do you really want to do this? After everything that's happened.. all the hurt we put each other through.. all the secrets.." you cast a glance at Ellie, who looks more reserved than you've ever seen her before. Sensing this is a moment you want to share alone, she gives a fleeting smile before she leaves, giving Joel a playful mock hit on his shoulder. Still smiling, Joel pats the space beside him in the bed and you snuggle in with him, his body warm.
"Haven't you figured it out yet?" Joel asks softly, eyes imploring you. "You're mine and I'm yours. That's how this thing of ours operates: you belong to me and I belong to you. Despite everything that's happened in the last twenty years, that's been the one constant." His hands grips yours, thumb running over your knuckles. "I don't care if I've got thirty years or thirty days left of my life. I wanna spend the rest of it with you, babygirl."
You search his eyes, seeing nothing there but the truth, laid bare and ready for you to either accept or deny.
He continues, "I don't wanna keep failin' you. I'm too much in love to let you go again." Then he gently lifts your chin, making sure you meet his eyes. "But only if you want me back."
Some would say you're on a precipice in the choice you're about to make, but it's not that difficult to choose. It's simply the separate paths you're on, converging at last. for good.
"You're the only one I've ever wanted," you whisper. It's not a fancy declaration of truth, a bit surprising coming from an English teacher, but it's the only thing Joel needs to hear before he pulls you close for another kiss.
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Joel's released on Christmas Eve, and the two of you don't waste any time.
You and Joel are married in a small, intimate ceremony in the spacious living room of his home. Ellie, Sarah, Theo, Finn, Tommy, Maria, Sofia, Ruby, and even Bill and Frank are in attendance, watching as a judge from town and friend of the Millers officiates.
Joel promises you a nicer wedding when the frost thaws, anywhere you want in the world. You tell him you can't imagine a more perfect place to marry the most perfect man for you.
Your first wedding went by in a blur, but this time around you engrave it upon your heart, make note of every little skip of your heart when you and Joel hold hands, his delicate touch as he places a gorgeous sapphire ring on your hand, the sweetness of his lips when you share your first kiss as husband and wife.
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After Christmas, Sarah and Theo leave for their honeymoon to Maui, and with the weather more agreeable the guests take leave too. Tommy sees to it that you and Joel have your house all to yourselves for your own honeymoon.
You insist on taking it easy with Joel, but he tells you he'd rather die while inside you, his name pouring from your lips the last thing he ever hears. He seems to get a second wind with you, making use of every possible flat surface in the house. You feel better about such activity when he takes his medication, promising to take it faithfully so long as you follow it with a kiss.
One morning after a particularly strenuous night, while drinking coffee in the kitchen and discussing your plans, Ellie returns, calling out to you before she enters.
"You're not doing anything gross in there, are you?"
"No," Joel laughs.
"Yes we are, we're working on making a sibling for you," you smirk over your coffee, glancing at Joel and giving a little shake of your head when his eyes go wide.
"Gross," she mutters, walking in. "Joel, Tommy says everyone's meeting at the Tipsy Bison for lunch later. But he couldn't get through to you on the phone." She makes a playful, pointed look, eyeing the two of you.
She's lukewarm to the idea of calling Joel 'Dad', and there's going to be some legal hoops to go through regarding Justin and his parental claim. But it all seems so small in comparison to the problems that plagued you before. You can get through anything because now you have each other.
You and Joel get ready as Ellie goes back to Tommy's, enjoying spending her time with Finn and getting ready to leave with them instead.
Unable to keep your hands off each other, it takes you twice as long to get dressed, hands going into each other's back pockets, lips finding each other's throats.
There's all the time in the world for it now.
Driving up to the Tipsy Bison, Joel turns on the radio. "Cherry, Cherry" starts to play, and you sing along with Neil Diamond, catching your husband's eye as he smiles and sings along too. The road before you is smooth, mountains standing guard in the distance, staying the same grand height no matter how far along you drive. Joel's hand finds yours, presses a kiss to it before entwining your fingers.
"Babe?"
"Yes, Mrs. Miller?"
You smile. "Let's not go right away. Let's drive around a little, play this song again, just soak in this moment."
"Of course, babygirl. I don't want to share you with the others just yet anyway."
Neil continues on the radio: No, we won't tell a soul where we gone to Girl, we do whatever we want to Ah, I love the way that you do me Cherry, babe, you really get to me
It's come full circle, and it only took two decades to complete. You and Joel in his truck, your song playing, the sun shining through the hazy clouds. You could close your eyes and it'd be 2003 again.
dividers by @saradika-graphics 👑
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pillowspace · 2 days ago
Note
csd ask about that cool concept you had for the end of the fic? may we know any more about it? :3
OH. HEY WAIT, DID I EVER SAY WHAT THAT WAS? I don't actually know what you're referring to exactly, but I can guess
Y/N was never actually from that universe. The CSD universe. They were never even from it. I don't know if you remember the frankenfate au but this was a little secret I held that made frankenfate funny to me, because... because Vale kinda was from a soulmate AU. It just wasn't of the soulmarks or red string variety.
Y/N had a destiny in a modern mer!DCA world, but they were taken from their universe as a toddler to eventually give Sun and Moon a weakness years down the line. I... I know it was William Afton's doing, I think Henry had trapped him someplace and he needed the power of multiple gods to escape or something like that? So he was using Eclipse to get his way, but he secretly had plans to also kill Eclipse once it was all done? That was probably it??
Being brought into this universe, it was like... forcefully jamming together two soulmates when Y/N's narrative was meant for a different Sun entirely. Y/N would find this out later, and although it'd be horrifying to them, they'd eventually decide that it didn't matter if this bond was planned with ill intent, they cared about Sun and Moon now so they had to HELP them! Once William or whatever the hell I planned to call him had trapped both Sun and Moon and gotten what they needed out of Y/N, William would just... send them back off. You've completed their role in this universe. Bye bye now.
So Y/N would've been sent back to their original world. Lost and horribly confused. They were only human. They didn't know how to go back. They're still reeling from realizing that they had been a trap since the moment they met Sun. They could just... stay here, even if they're too scared to approach their own family. Knowing how their life was meant to play out, it's not hard for Y/N to stick close to the sea and soon meet the Sun and Moon they were fated to meet. And it feels like something's clicked, they had always been drawn to water, but they also feel so... empty. Their wants conflict with their fate because a god had decided to tamper with it. They miss their universe, this isn't the home they were raised in, they want to go back!!
And then they meet Michael and Elizabeth. Two gods who Y/N had met in godly disguise before, so they don't recognize the siblings. But Michael recognizes them, and after some conversations, Michael picks up on the fact that Y/N isn't some parallel version but instead the very same person he had met before. So Michael makes an offer. I can't get you directly back to your universe, it doesn't work like that. But it does work like a staircase. Each step is a different universe, and if you'll let me help you get through each world having fulfilled a goal, you'll be able to move on to the next. At the end of that journey will be the universe you truly see as home.
Y/N agrees, and later has a heartfelt goodbye with the mers. I'll... note that the mers don't really talk, so it was just Y/N thanking them, apologizing, and wishing them well in life.
Truthfully, I know I had a reason for how this happens, but I can't remember it: CSD Eclipse also travels with Y/N. They're there, I can't remember why 😭 But their dynamic is... easier then. The two (three?) of them bicker back and forth, but that's a lot healthier than whatever Eclipse had going on previously.
Fun fact!! One of the universes they would end up in on their journey back to the CSD Universe would actually have Sunna and Meno. Y/N would've gotten to meet them separately. Eclipse would've had... feelings about that universe.
I didn't want to drive in the idea of soulmates being this big and necessary thing, so Y/N would eventually come to learn after their happy ending with the gods that the mers are now happy with friends of their own. Everyone got what they wanted, even if the whole rhythm of life got disrupted into a new story.
SO? SURPRISE? CSD Y/N WAS FROM A MER UNIVERSE THE ENTIRE TIME? I hope this is coherent, I'm fighting for my life to sound even remotely coherent in any of this
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evervigilantnightshade · 1 day ago
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The Line - Part 7
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Reader and John have always straddled the line between playful flirting and taking things further. However when they are forced into a safe house and a secret comes out will they be able to save what they were heading for or is all lost.
Reader x John Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Laswell, Original characters.
MDNI
Warnings: Angst, violence towards reader, reader attacked by men, a pup gets hurt (but don't worry he's ok) Blood, fluff, flirting, a bit of light smut. Death and killing on missions, Father of reader's death mentioned. Simon's past mentioned
Authors Note - It's here, the part you've all been waiting for. The truth
MASTERLIST
They sat around the table, Simon sat on Y/N’s right and Price on her left. She was drained and didn't have the energy to do this. She looked over at Simon who looked nervous. 
“Do you want me to tell them?”
“No I can do it.” He took a deep breath. “Just tryin to figure out where to start.” 
After taking a moment he looked at Soap, Gaz and Price. When he looked over at Y/N she was biting her thumbnail with a look of deep concern on her face. That’s when he realised that he had been so caught up on how telling the team would affect him and his peace he momentarily forgot that by exposing all of this, she was being put in a place of vulnerability too. 
“I need to tell you a bit of background first and it won’t be short.This farm, our home. It’s Y/N’s family home. She grew up here. Her dad was a military man and growing up all she ever wanted to do was follow in his footsteps. So when she enlisted she worked damn hard to do just that. She ended up with top marks in both her physical and written exams. She excelled and joined an elite Canadian task force. After being with them for a bit she was chosen for the Specialized Snipper Program in the UK, and that’s where we met.” 
He took a moment to look at her to make sure she was ok, and then continued. 
“I was a weird, intense angry loner that was hyper focused on training and being top of the program. She was the only female and had the same goal and intensity. No one spoke to either of us, so we started working together. We challenged each other and would argue over who was better. I wasn’t there to make friends but I started not minding being around her.”
He saw Y/N smile at that and then continued. 
“At Christmas we all got leave and when Y/N found out I had nowhere to go she decided I was coming home with her. She didn’t even ask me, she just walked into my room, handed me a plane ticket and told me to be ready in an hour. Deciding whatever she had planned had to be better than staying on base, I obeyed.” 
He looked up at the guys now. 
“I don’t exactly talk about it but I had a fucked up childhood. Real traumatic shit. So when we got here and the first thing Momma Lynn did was hug me, I uh.. I was shocked. In my experience parents don’t hug. But instead of backing off when she felt my tension she just gave me a quick squeeze and then pulled back, looked in my eyes and gave me a kind smile.”
Y/N reached over and squeezed his hand.  
"Y/N has four sisters so the house was busy and loud.” He chucked at that. “I remember walking into the living room and all the girls were playing a board game at the dining room table and they were bickering and yelling at each other one moment and then next laughing loudly. Her dad was sitting on the couch reading a book. I looked at him and asked him if all the noise bothered him. He looked at me and then the girls and smiled. He said that no it didn’t bother him, in fact it was his favourite sound in the world.”
Y/N reached up and wiped a tear that was rolling down her face. 
“Again I’d never experienced anything like this before. Even on Christmas morning I sat back and watched as they all opened presents for each other, just enjoying the moment. Then Momma Lynn handed me some gifts with a smile. I’d never gotten a Christmas gift before, I just stared at them, and I’ll admit I almost didn’t want to open them, instead I wanted to tuck them away forever, charish them. 
Y/N saw me and sat beside me, she grabbed my hand and squeezed it before encouraging me to open them. I expected something generic like a box of chocolates and some socks but it wouldn’t have mattered what it was, I would’ve loved it regardless. Instead I opened the first gift and it was an artbook and some really nice drawing pencils. Momma Lynn was watching and she explained that Y/N had told them that I like to doodle all the time and that I was really good. 
The next gift I opened was a nice wooden box with my last name etched on the top and inside was a high end gun maintenance kit. When I looked up her dad just looked at me and explained he’d gotten one from his father when he joined up and he’d done the same for Y/N. I actually got a bit emotional and had to pretend like I had to use the washroom so I could gather myself.
It was the best Christmas I had ever had in my life. When we were leaving Momma Lynn took me aside and made me promise to come home with Y/N the next holiday we had leave and of course I agreed. After that, I started wearing the mask, because I had something I cared about.” 
Simon looked up and saw everyone looking at him intently, listening to his every word. 
“For the next year, anytime we got leave I came home with Y/N and by the following Christmas, Momma Lynn and Y/N’s dad sat me down. They told me that they wanted me to be a member of their family. They told me that they thought of me as one of their kids since the first Christmas and they wanted me to feel the same. I actually cried openly for the first time in years. I had a family. They’d even set up a bedroom for me, said I could come and go as I pleased but hoped it was more coming than going. The girls all felt the same and so that was the day I gained a mom, a dad and five sisters. It wasn’t legally done but that didn’t matter to any of us. 
Then something unexpected happened. I fell in love. We both fought it for a long time. I didn’t want to jeopardise what I had and even though it killed me, I refused to risk it. It wasn’t until Mom and dad sat me down one day. They told me that nothing I could ever do would ever change the fact that I was their son. She gave me her grandma’s ring and both gave their blessing. So five years ago, I married Y/N’s sister Ava. Y/N was my ‘best woman’, we had the wedding in the yard and it was the happiest moment of my life. That was until this past April when Ava gave birth to our daughter Clara.” 
He glanced  around the table and saw tears in not only Y/N’s eyes but Soaps as well though he quickly wiped them away.
“Something you should know is Y/N had been asked to join the 141 before I was. Kate had approached her because she’d been doing work for her and knew how good of an agent she was. Then Price approached me. We discussed it and she offered to back out, let me have the team. I wanted to work with her again and knew she deserved a spot on this team though. So I told her if we kept our relationship with each other a secret, if we pretended we didn’t know each other to protect the family then we could be on the same team. She hated the idea of keeping secrets but agreed. 
There are several reasons why I didn’t tell you, and I didn’t let Y/N. The first being that this family, my family, is more important to me than anything in the world and I would die before ever letting anything happen to them. We make a lot of enemies out there and I keep them protected by keeping my mouth shut. The second reason is that when I have this mask on, I’m Ghost. I do what needs to be done and get as dirty as I need too. But when I’m here, the mask comes off and I’m Simon. Sharing that’s hard for me. It’s a trust that I have to build and makes me feel incredibly vulnerable. You’ve only ever seen me as Ghost and I wasn’t ready to share this side of me with you at the time.” 
“Are you ready now?” Soap asked 
“I am. I’d been thinking about it before I found out that we were coming here. Y/N had told me she wanted to tell John the night we blew up the warehouse, before things went to shit. I’d come to the conclusion that it was time.” 
John looked over at Y/N sadly. God he fucked this up. 
“So you and Y/N aren’t married with children.” Gaz confirmed
“No Gaz, we're not married with children. We do love each other though, just in a sibling way instead of romantic way.” Y/N shrugged
“Never said I loved you.” Simon teased beside her 
“You do all the time you softy.” 
“Ok but I still don’t get all the secrecy behind Y/N and her background.” Soap said confused. 
“Well that is another thing I suppose.” Simon looked at Y/N and she nodded. 
He got up and walked over to a painting on the wall, pulled it forward revealing a safe. Typing in the number he opened the safe door and pulled out a file, walked over and placed it on the table. 
Y/N ran her finger over the top of the file and frowned. 
“I know at this point it doesn’t matter much anymore but this is my full file, no holds bar. The reason everything is redacted is because of our dad. Like Simon said, he was a military man. The issue is that he is a very famous man in the military community. His call sign was Phantom 1.” 
“Holy shit, your da is Phantom 1!” Soap exclaimed. 
“I don’t understand, who is Phantom 1?” Gaz asked 
“He was an insanely efficient agent ‘n’ a fuckin amazin sniper. He wis sae weel known in the community that when he died last year, they had tae have two funerals. One fur his folk and one for a' th’ military personnel that wanted tae attend. They even streamed it tae bases a’ over the world. His identity was sae weel hidden that his folk had tae wear veils ‘n’ masks to his funeral! He’s a legend.” 
Soap looked up at Y/N then realised what he just said.
“Oh shit love, I’m sorra.” 
“It’s fine.”
But she felt a lump form in her throat. She looked over at Simon and he squeezed her hand. 
“I’ll take it from here. As Soap said, our da was good at what he did, but with that brought enemies. Hence our super secret, super protected ‘farm’. There are cameras everywhere, the walls behind the hedges have motion and weight sensors, there’s a lock down procedure for the house. It’s how Y/N grew up. So when she joined up they knew that if anyone found out that Y/N was his daughter there was a chance that she would be used as leverage to coax him out of retirement or to just get plain old revenge. So they scrapped any connection to her dad and that included Canada. Hence the redacted file.” 
Y/N looked up at the team and sighed.
“I’m going to ask that even though I’m probably not going to be on the team after this, to protect this information even after I leave? Even though he’s gone we still don’t want this information leaked.” 
“Can we talk about that please Y/N?” John asked 
“Not right now. I’m emotionally and physically exhausted. I also don’t think any of us are in the right mindset at this moment to discuss. So let’s table it for now. I’m 10 feet away from my momma and I just want to get up there.” 
They all nodded and she gave them a soft smile. 
“Si rules?”  
“Yeah ok. I guess now that we’ve explained the situation I’ll get into rules and all that fun stuff. Like any other house, be polite, try and limit swearing especially around the kids.”
“Though they are used to it. Uncle Simon has a potty mouth and has to put a loonie in the jar every time he swears” Y/N added and the group laughed
“They’ll hold you to that too. The money goes to them so they’ll call you out every chance they get. Little buggers.”  
“What ta hell is a loonie?” Soap asked and Simon chucked
“A dollar. It’s a coin. I have a bucket of them in my apartment, remind me to give you some. Anyways it’s a free roam house, the kitchen is open, nothing’s really off limits. The biggest rules are no weapons on person. Don’t worry there are stashes all over the house, we just don’t want the kids seeing a gun peeking out from behind your shirt or god forbid one of them getting their hands on one.”
“How many kids are there here?” Gaz frowned
“Well our sister Charlie has two, a boy named Ky who just turned eighteen and a girl named Meadow who just turned fourteen. Then our sister Brooke has twin girls that are five, Freya and Idun, we call her Edie. Those are the ones you have to watch out for. Then me and Ava have Clara that’s eight months. Y/N and Ems are child free.” 
“And they all live here?” 
“No, but they’ve been told to come here for protection. Ava and I live here. Dad converted two rooms in the basement into a small apartment for us. Y/N lives here too, and has a room in the basement as well. Then Momma Lynn obviously and recently our Grandma moved in so mom could take care of her.”
“Which ones are single?” Soap asked with a smirk 
“Johnny I swear to god if you even look at one of my sisters I’ll rip your dick off.” Simon growled. 
Beside him though Y/N looked at Soap and mouthed Emma and Charlie. Then smiled and winked at him. 
“Alright, the last rule’s the most important. We don’t talk about work. Ever. So no chatting about past missions, injuries, guns, no call signs, none of that. If we need to talk about anything we come down here.”
Everyone nodded in agreement
“So that’s it. We’ll go in the room next door, it has lockers for all of us so anything that doesn’t fit in that standard is put in the locker. Laswell also sent over some stuff for us to make us comfortable and it’s been placed in your locker. Any questions before we call it?” 
Everyone shook their heads and as Simon stood up, Soap and Gaz followed suit and they headed out of the room with the exception of John and Y/N. She picked her file up off the table and held it out to him. 
“You can read it if you want. I’m not hiding anything anymore. All my merit is listed out for you.” 
He looked at the file and then took it from her hand. 
“Y/N, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for all of it.” 
“I know. Me too. But what’s done is done and even though you’re sorry it doesn’t erase the things you said, or what you’ve done. We’ve got to move forward, it’s just not the way I thought we were going too or how it would look.” 
“Is there anything I can say to fix this? You said you love me and I need to tell you…” 
“John, stop. It’s too late. And anything you say at this point just seems disingenuous. Like you’re only saying what you think I want to hear to fix this. It’s over, we have to accept that.” 
She left the room and John felt his heart break. He placed the file on the table and followed her out of the room. 
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