#he is a very good boy... stupid
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the fact that we never actually got to see kuboyasu interact with saiki in gym class is such a crime
hes like the most perceptive of the group so it wouldve been so fun to see how kusuo would hide his powers around him
i kinda wouldve loved to see them flesh out the "shadow leader" bit a little more instead of just forgetting about it lmao, yasu being sorta like hairo and thinking saiki has hidden power or something
#ik a lot of people have said that aren doesnt think that anymore#and maybe i need to reread ?? cuz im unsure but i dont thinkkk thats ever said or alluded to#so i want to see him either going crazy trying to observe saiki and figure out wtf is up#and/or him slowly losing interest because saiki is clearly just an wet cat boy with autism charm#that woudlve been sooooo funnyyyyy#side note kokomi is also very perceptive but very stupid when it comes to specifically saiki#because he defies everything she knows about men#aren is just as silly as the rest of the group but i dont think he has the same foggy perception of people so#yea idk#this just made me think of that cuz i think they would make a really good team#teruhashi and kuboyasu AND saiki ?? unstoppable#ok done yapping bai#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo#kuboyasu aren#meows post
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Thinking about Aether and Phantom quintosis lesson. It's all going well and all, Aether's letting Phant explore his head on his own a little because he's actually really talented y'know! And then he hits a particular spot and Aether goes brainless, practically drooling on spot if yk what I'm onto...
Everyone always comes to Aeth to shut their thoughts up, but now he's on the receiving end for the first time in a whiiiile and he's just gone.
Just a big brainless quint :)
Shakes you violently because I’ve been thinking about this ever since I saw it
(Warning that this is a little dubious but consent is implied and implied to have been discussed prior, just didn’t want it to come out of nowhere in case someone isn’t up for that 🫶
Also I made it weird bc confident phantom has been on my brain recently)
Aether talks him through it. Takes phantoms hands and places them on either side of his head, covering them with his own.
He trusts him under his own supervision, able to step in if something were to go wrong.
It’s easy, to aethers surprise. Phantom being able to pick at different memories, emotions, doesn’t take long for phantom to start trying to control his limbs.
“Am I doing that?” Phantoms eyes light up when aether hand moves slowly to the side.
“You are bug, good job”
Aether thinks it’s cute watching him get so excited over his powers.
Different tour memories flash in and out as phantom practically rummages through his brain like a storage bin. His face muscles twitch while phantom drags over certain nerves. Quintessence can be a dangerous game in the wrong hands, the power to as you please to someone only to be trusted in the right hands.
A particular wave of fuzz washes over aether as phantom gets a little more confident with the electricity he has wrapped around his mind. He feels cloudy, it’s not unfamiliar but he knows exactly what phantom is doing considering he’s done it to the other ghouls countless times before.
“Bug…..” aether warns taking a deep breath. He feels like there’s cotton behind his eyes, his breathing becoming deep and more manual.
Phantom prods again. A sharp buzz in the base of his skull and it’s hard for aether to get out the words to warn him again.
Phantom understands what he’s doing, especially considering this form of mind control has been done to him before. it’s the only reason aether hasn’t removed him yet but it’s a helpless and almost calming sort of feeling, looking up to see phantom smiling at him with his magic completely taking over his senses.
“Please let me take care of you?” Phantom tips aethers chin up to look at him, the other hand caressing his cheek. Aether can feel just a bit more quintessence slip in as he nods.
He’s completely brainless, barely a thought besides what’s directly in front of him and a small attempt to keep his breathing normal. It’s all he can do to keep his vision straight, mind full of static and he can’t help but smile at phantom, giggling slightly. A comfortable mindless state of pleasure.
“Never been able to have you all stupid for me have I aeth?” Phantom teases. It’s light hearted in nature but god it does something to aether. He could practically drool if he really wanted to, phantoms light teasing enough to have him salivating. Something so delicious about being able to have your thoughts shut up and being taken care of, aethers been craving it for a while.
A delicate hand pushes its way under aethers shirt. Phantom looks for any sign of protest before lifting it off of his body and discarding it on the floor beside them. Aethers immediately handsy, giggly and trying whatever he can to get phantom back on him. His limbs feel like they’re full of concrete as he tries to reach up to pull him closer. Time moves slow, almost too slow for him with the idea phantoms put into his head of him doing whatever he wants to him.
Phantom makes quick work of his own clothes while aether chews his lip, small moans escaping as phantom strips in his lap. He’s easy like this, hard and stupid and just desperate for anything from phantom he can get.
“You’re needy when you’re like this” phantom teases, reaching for the buttons on aethers pants. “Big and stupid like a whore should be”
Phantom grabs aethers hand, pulling it around his waist to finger himself with it, “your fingers are thicker than mine, gotta stretch myself out to take you baby” phantom gasps as he pushes aethers fingers into himself
It’s a tight stretch, phantom working himself with two of aethers fingers guided by his own, if he’s not careful he could probably just use aether like this and cum in his lap but oh, he wants to see how bad aeth can get when he sits on his cock.
Aethers streams out incoherent pleas and curses as phantom finally pulls him out, stroking him a couple times just to hear him whimper
“Fuck you’re much better like this, dumb and useful, just a dildo for me to use right?”
#I have so many asks yall im fucking busting these bitches OUT#I am so very in love with this concept though#STUPID AETHER MY BELOVED#he’s such a good boy#also let phantom dom he deserves it#dom phantom can be so fun there’s so many possibilities#the band ghost#ghost#nameless ghouls#ghost bc#fanfic#wrath writes#aether ghoul#phantom ghoul
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sas rh: let eoin survive the fall au » the astronomer philosopher, the earth and the moon
#sas rogue heroes#sasrh:canonau#augustin jordan#eoin mcgonigal#paddy mayne#although it is true paddy orbits eoin like the moon does the earth (moreso after the first jump)#and that everyone knows theyre basically attached at the hip (however you wish to interpret that)#it is *also* true the more the sas wins and advances the more david is requesting paddys presence for important matters#(and *yes* david's quite sure LT mcgonigal can handle waiting outside the tent on his own paddy hes a big boy alright now get in there)#HOWEVER#paddy starts noticing that ACTUALLY eoin is not waiting on his own so much cause theres another fucking lieutenant#who keeps orbiting around almost like moth to flame#and its weird but its no big deal at first - eoin is a social guy anyways so it makes sense even if this ones french ?#(plus paddy keeps his one on one time so no notes there)#BUT#suddenly they're sharing looks and smiles and sort of digs at each other and paddy knows damn well the way eoin is teasing#and apparently frenchie goes along with it adding his own brand of *something* and what the fuck#and then it seems like they have almost inside jokes and sometimes paddy gets out of his stupid briefing#and jordan is walking away all too pleased and eoin is all to calm smiling up at him like he didn't just maybe spent an hour#talking to a fucking french of all people. THIS ONE french of all people.#but then eoin is very good at distracting him and hoarding his attention away from other things#especially when he grabs his arm to drag him to the piano#(and in truth what nags at paddys brain is that he doesn't *hate* this necessarily ?? even if the knowledge picks at his brain)#(it... gets his attention it makes him think and wonder and he gets a little grumpy sure cause thats his eoin BUT#he doesn't hate it necessarily. and *that* should be a problem or something)#anyways back with my all have two hands agenda !!! look how cute they look together !!!
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Daniel with Shyla pre- vs. post-sarcophagus addiction
#what shyla does to him is truly and thoroughly deeply fucked up if you think about it. anyway more meta in the tags below lol#stargate#sg-1#daniel jackson#shyla#michael shanks#s2#ep5#2.5#***edits#love love love how they showed his descent in this ep#the transition from gentle and patient and considerate danny into a smarmy swaggering piece of shit#also as deeply fucked up as what shyla does is you almost get it???#like she's so lonely and isolated at the beginning of the episode she tries to commit suicide#and there's daniel saving her! she's never had anyone except her mother who died and her abusive father so of course she gets attached#and she is prepared to do ANYTHING to keep him because she's isolated and naive and yeah it's really fucked up and she becomes the abuser#and in order to try to keep him she changes him so drastically from the man she actually liked. because she's young and isolated and stupid#and when after all she put him through he STILL comes back to help her and it's THAT that spurs her to change her entire civilization#to break the cycle her father started#all because daniel first saved her and then forgave her#my VERY GOOD BOY!!!!!
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Rich Boarding School Au doodles, ft Bruce, Harvey, Lex and Ollie
headcannons under cut lol
Yes, Bruce and Lex are roommates. They stuck the Weird Rich Kids together
Ollie is there solely because I think its hilarious that well into their 40s Bruce does something that makes Ollie realize that he KNOWS WHO BATMAN IS. and that batman is the little weirdo he went to high school with
Ollie was scared of bruce and never talked to him. was 100% convinced that that kid did human sacrifice at some point or smthing.
Bruce and Harvey def picked on Lex. Were they his only friends? yes. Were they also really toxic and mean? Yes. Not that lex was nice either but ya know.
Lex has walked in on bruce and harvey kissing many times. poor boy just wants to chill in his room. He never tells anyone (who tf is he gonna tell anyway?) but he still thinks about it. in a 'he remembers it at the wirdest times, leans back, and goes huh' way.
Harvey doesnt realize he's bi until after his redemption arc in the far future. Because, obviously, making out with bruce over the years doesnt count. It's Bruce.
#i stg ollie puts the puzzle peices together over smthing so stupid#like a zorro refrence that batman makes#and he is just transported back in time#I personly love the ides that Harvey was Fostered by the waynes#but the classic wayne scholarship route is good and dandy too#ollie is also just a very popular kid. He def makes fun of the others.#but not to their face because hes scared bruce will murder him#i made bruce look all shy but thats only because harvey is talking to him that boy stands like a demon in a dark hallway when hes alone.#blue eyes that stare straight into your soul and all#bruharv#bruce wayne#harvey dent#batman#two face#twobats#oliver queen#lex luthor#boarding school#shittalkingmushroomarts
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It's interesting, I don't think my father really ever thinks about the ways his identity as a mixed race Japanese man has affected his life and the way he moved through the world, because most of his life was spent around other poc and in communities that didn't really view him as an oddity so he never really had that explicit discriminatory experience where his race was made the defining piece of his identity if you know what I mean, but I have this distinct memory in my mind of the way he would talk about the movie "Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle", the way his eyes sparkled and his face lit up when he talked about this movie versus other films with similar vibes, but with all white casts instead. There was something about seeing the face of young John Cho dressed in clothes that could have come from my father's own closet go on a stupid stoner boy adventure with his brown friend that made my father happy in a way no other stupid stoner boy movie ever did before, it was the only one of those movies I ever remember him even talking about let alone the amount of times he would bring "Harold and Kumar" up in conversations completely unprompted, and maybe it was just the writing that hit him differently, but I have this vague memory of him saying something about how it stuck with him more because there had never been a movie like that starring Asian guys before, that the fun and cooky oddball roles never went to men who looked like my father, but it was his personality, he was the type of guy to try to go White Castle and end up on fifty comedic tangents when he was the same age as Harold and Kumar. It's just one of those things that I've never forgotten, I doubt he even knows how much those comments stuck with me all these years, but it was one of those moments as kid you can't forget, when you see a certain emotion on your parent's face that you've never seen before. It took me years to realize exactly what it was on his face and what it was about "Harold and Kumar" that made it so special to my dad, I don't even know how much he's aware of the fact that the representation in the movie is a big part of what endears him to it, but I think about it a lot. About how that one small bit of representation, in a movie most people would probably write off, made my dad feel seen in a way he never really did before
#ignore me#harold and kumar#personal#john cho#kal penn#its 3am and im having thoughts#watched a youtube video about comedy movies and then showed john chos face from a different project#but it made me think about harold and kumar#and whenever i think about harold and kumar i think about my dad#because i just remember the way he would NOT shut up about that movie when i was a kid#im surprised he never forced me to sit down and watch it with him 😭😭😭#my dad generally isnt a big fan of comedies like that#like he likes a good comedy but i feel like the only comedies i can remember heeping praise onto were galaxy quest and harold and kumar#which like very different vibes yk#those raunchy stupid stoner boy movies were never a thing my father gravitated towards#pretty sure his opinion on adam sandler and comedy of a similar style is abject dislike#but harold and kumar?#my dad could not and would not stop talking about those two#if i remember correctly i think he even regarded it as like a shifting point in the genre#media#representation
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idk if i've discussed it before (i have certainly THOUGHT about it) but someone on my kuwa suffering ep 89 comp mentioned it and i just had to go off about it like. ok. sensui tells yusuke something along the lines of "you heard itsuki" when itsuki's inside the uraotoko, implying that not only can sensui hear those inside the uraotoko, but that he expects yusuke to be able to as well. which means that yusuke Almost Certainly Heard And Kind Of Ignored kuwabara's prolonged mental breakdown and wailing about how much he needs yusuke to live etc. which. guHHH i hate him yusuke you ass but also listen.
the only acknowledgement yusuke gives to this (if any) is when he says something like "sensui you're sooo fucking cooked this plan's going perfectly (my friends are going to get strong and kill you when i die)." he's trash talking to sensui, ignoring the others because, i think, he doesn't want to acknowledge what he's doing to them.
yusuke is explicitly recreating the experience he had with kuwabara's "death" at the hands of toguro, complete with the announcement of intent (and power) to kill, the inability to impede the threat in any way (barring a power-breakthrough), and the target in some way racing towards/volunteering for their death. yusuke learns through doing, and through tough love-style approaches. it's only effective if it hurts. watching kuwabara die like that was devastating to yusuke, but it sure as hell fucking worked. he beat toguro because of that maneuver. so even if he has to (re-)traumatize his friends in the process, this method will make his friends stronger, and he feels confident in that. but he never had to live with the consequences of kuwabara's death, not really. that's something hiei makes clear before they enter the cave as well, that there are no fake-outs ready to make him or anyone else stronger. the only deaths here will be real. the only power gained will come at a high, permanent cost. hiei's warning is an attempt to keep everyone alive, to keep yusuke from being stupid. and then yusuke decides to take that fatality into his own hands, but it's kind of his friends who would pay the price. he's going to make them live through the days, months, years without him, the actual permanency of loss (assuming they survive for that long), something he never experienced with kuwabara (a new facet of that traumatic scenario), AND he's escaping the emotional fallout of this choice through death. he doesn't have to see them mourn, won't get yelled at, won't watch them fail to move on. he's tapping out and choosing to believe they'll be fine.
but i think he feels guilty. just a little. i mean, yusuke couldn't even believe that people cared about him enough to want him alive in episode one. he's staked everything on his friends, which means he still kind of... doesn't value his own life, at least not compared to theirs. but he believes his friends love him and want him around, and we know that because he has to, or else he wouldn't make a plan that depends entirely on that love. he is actively leveraging the care he doesn't think he deserves, trying to hurt them in a way he is intimately familiar with (only worse), for.... what, exactly?
this is kind of my sticking point tbh. i don't think the answer is... super clear, but let's start with what it's not.
yusuke is not doing this because it is the most practical way to save all of humanity; that would be the mafukan, which he stopped. it could be a gamble to save all of his friends? the mafukan strategy would guarantee koenma's death/eternal imprisonment, whereas this strategy gambles all of humanity on the chance that his friends come out of the Easy Break Oven strong enough to avert the end of the world. if the sacrifice of even one friend is completely intolerable, perhaps he'd accept those slim odds and their steep consequences. yusuke tends to take risks like that, especially when he's got fight-induced tunnel vision. he doesn't think things through too much; his schemes are usually dependent on surprising his enemy enough to oneshot them. truthfully, i think this is the closest we'll get to an answer, and it's a more conventional one for this kind of story. but there is another layer i haven't been able to get from my mind.
i think yusuke is gifting each of his friends an honorable warrior's death.
so, in case it needs saying, yusuke, kuwabara, kurama, and hiei all (at least once, if not several times) exhibit a desire to die in combat in a way they deem noble to give their lives purpose (usually by self-sacrifice, but sometimes by another metric of honor, like hiei's duel with shigure and his desire to die in mutual defeat against an evenly matched opponent; or even kurama's decision to fight shigure in his human form, displaying a sort of passive suicidality via placing being true to himself in this (somewhat symbolic/inconsequential) way over survival). they need to make their lives count for something, because they feel guilty for being alive (kurama and hiei feel guilty for their past actions (hiei's is most evident in his distance from yukina, though that's not its primary reason), hiei, kuwabara, and yusuke have all been ostracized and made to feel like burdens on/unwanted by their caregivers and general society; all four of them have felt profound isolation even from their loved ones (yusuke and hiei are rather obvious; kurama can never tell his mother about the majority of his life nor what she truly means to him in the context of it; and kuwabara is separated from his peers for his spiritual awareness and his "stupidity" (plus his parents aren't around? and he is Desperate to define manhood/manliness through a broader pop cultural one which includes the warrior sacrifice thing bc he has no male role models BUT that's for another post) (i will admit kuwa's the most tenuous one here irt isolation)). they want to die for a cause so badly it's actually physically painful to me. it is passive suicidality, and they define their lives and identities by their relation to, engagement with, and skill at doing violence, etc. they live to die by the sword. anyway. nobody talks about it but i think it's very important to understanding what yusuke's doing here.
because i think he knows that about himself and his friends. they're kindred spirits. at the very least he knows this about kuwabara, who literally made a speech about this before diving into toguro's fingers In The Event That He Is Recreating Explicitly. he is dying nobly like they all want to on the chance that they'll get to break out and fight sensui rather than dying without even getting to take a swing. it's about his pride and theirs. but i don't think yusuke necessarily believes they'll win. he knows better than anyone how strong sensui is, and how wide the gap is between sensui and team urameshi. his stated position that humanity is doomed and that he doesn't care about its fate is, i think, not completely genuine, but if we take it at face value, he's not killing himself so that his friends can survive the end of the world. something's going to come around and kill them eventually. he's doing it so they can survive long enough to fight sensui. he needs them (specifically kuwabara) to be strong enough to free themselves to begin round two. but he's given up on their side winning, on humanity surviving, on his own victory---why should he think his friends are capable of winning? this could be another case of yusuke's fight-blinders. it could be another gamble, more blind faith put in his friends. but honestly it reads more to me that yusuke's giving them a chance to die together on the battlefield. them winning would be great, but it's not his goal. it's a pipe dream.
he knows he's going to be killed. they're probably going to be killed, too. but to make it so they last a little longer against sensui, to make the odds a little more even, so they are killed not like livestock, but like worthy fighters, he'd die a little faster. it's the best kind of death someone like them can have; and he'll deprive himself of it just to make their ends a little sweeter. even if the road to that is far more bitter.
but it's not like yusuke's friends know what he's thinking or agree to it, and he can't exactly make his case for it in the moment. he's making that choice for them. whatever his intentions, whatever odds he thinks they have of beating sensui, he's kind of sealing all of their fates. so how the hell is he supposed to acknowledge kuwabara screaming at him not to die, trying desperately to express what yusuke means to him in what could be their final moments together? this plan is going to hurt his friends terribly. it is already doing so, and he can hear it. his choices to stop koenma from using the mafukan and to die for his friends' strength are both selfish in some way, no matter how you read the scene. if yusuke comforts kuwabara, he might not get strong enough. if he twists the knife, well... how could he forgive himself? and either way by responding he would have to face them all and say yes, i'm doing this regardless of your feelings (with the intention of hurting you). so i think he does what he often does. he avoids it. he lets that emotion glance off him and his bravado and his one-liners so he doesn't have to deal with the fact that he's hurting people, that he's scared and guilty and unsure of himself. that he's about to die again, about to put kuwabara through the grief he saw at his wake again, only worse; about to put his quieter friends through something similar.
yusuke is confronted with the responsibility one has to the people who care for them, and he runs from it in an attempt to give them some small peace. just like when he died before and thought hey, at least my mom and keiko won't be burdened by me anymore. because the only thing he can really do for them is die.
#UGH. sick of this stupid show (<- pathologically obsessed with it (it's just on a downturn rn))#anyway hi welcome back to my terrible mind here's another excruciatingly long yyh meta post no one's gonna read that i should just make a#video essay because nobody wants to squint through all that text but MAYBE they'd listen to me read it out. anyway#i actually made and then abandoned another post comparing yusuke's sacrifice here to genkai's death by toguro if anyone's interested in tha#anyway yeah sorry if im rusty in uh talkking about these guys. they're still rattling around in here dw#that comment just fucking hijacked my brain. my first thought was to make an ep 89 yusuke pov fic but since that's Probably not#gonna ever Actually get done (sorry) i figured i'd put the analysis behind it here bc this fucking choice makes me want to rip my hair out#(in a good way in a painful way)#yeah this gets derailed. ugh i hope all that stuff about yusuke's motivation in this gambit makes sense bc i still don't feel 100% about my#reading of it. his ass IS very much an unreliable narrator. but in what way? ehhhhh it's hard to say for sure in this case. to me.#yyh#yu yu hakusho#yyh meta#yayyy#yusuke urameshi#literally wrote for so long the sun started rising (<- not impressive since you don't know when i began writing. but i can't tell you bc i#don't remember lol)#also: his relinquishing of this fight is very interesting to me. he loses his shit when raizen kills sensui and deprives him of that victor#and he tells the others to stand down once he returns. so clearly he still Cares about beating sensui himself#but when he thinks there's no other choice he's willing to settle for passing that torch to his friends#he's like well they've earned a good revenge killing. as a treat#the real answer is probably something like 'it would fuck with the pacing' but fuck that lol it's in the show i'm going to talk about it#and a lot of this still applies even if he Can't hear them bc he Has to expect the begging and crying bc 1. he's lived it via toguro 2. his#plan depends on it. even if he's only imagining his friends' heartbreak he's choosing to ignore it for the sake of his plan#ANYWAY the real answer for. pretty much everyone is to give up fighting and find something healthier to attach their worth to#which is why kuwa not being in the final arc is a good thing (as much as it hurts me not to see my boy)#yyh really said YOU HAVE TO BECOME WELL ADJUSTED. DYING WILL NOT GET YOU OUT OF IT#i only skimmed thru this once sorry if it's ass
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Since you suggested asks for the demon Castys AU...
I'd love to see if Neteri would let him outside like she did with Erebus, and how he would act during the outing, and find out what his reasons might be for not stubbornly fighting her at every turn. Or maybe he does take the chance and run for it? I'm mostly just curious how that scenario would play out.
Sorry this took so long but it's 3.5k words of these two being goobers so I hope that makes up for the wait!
←Previous - Castys & Terror AU Masterlist - Castys Masterlist
Ingredients: some dehumanization associated with slavery, threatened vivisection, noncon touching (unsexy), mentioned noncon surgery, mentioned aphobia
"I thought this was supposed to be, like, a good day for me."
"It is!"
"Put the fucking leash away, then."
"Maybe if you actually behaved for me, I'd consider it, but you're not exactly the most trustworthy, Castys."
Castys rolled his eyes, grumbling. Neteri was the one who'd fucked up his crazy arm surgery and let that creepy bitch H-something come in and nearly strip him naked, but, sure, he was the one being ridiculous. "I guess, but I never even said I wanted to leave the palace. I just wanted delicious street food. You're the one who's deciding to take me outside."
Neteri sighed. "Have you ever even had street food?"
"…No. I just, uh…" Castys scratched the back of his head. "It…it always smelled good from the window of the castle. But my parents wouldn't let me go and try it. Said it was 'unbefitting of my station'." He snorted. "Like I'd ever been up to their standards anyway."
Neteri gave him a sympathetic smile. "I figured it was something like that. Well, what you don't know is that it's best to eat street food when it's fresh. It wouldn't be as good if I just brought it back to you. Plus, I think part of the experience is eating it on the street! Well, not in the street, you don't want to get hit by carts-"
"That much was obvious, thanks." Castys weighed his options. Stay here and think of something else he wanted, or agree to humiliation and eat delicious hot food on sticks? Sure, his magic tongue made everything taste good, but what he wanted was variation, something he'd never tasted before. Those mysterious smells that always wafted up to his window. Fuck, he was already salivating a bit. It didn't help that he hadn't eaten much last night in anticipation of today. "Fine. We can go."
"Great! You won't regret it, I promise!" She said that like Castys wasn't already regretting it a bit, feeling the weight of the chain as she attached it to his new metal collar. The weird red arm she'd given him turned the same shade of brown as the rest of him pretty soon after he got it, but after a few days he'd managed to make it turn red again and grow claws when he wanted it to, and the first thing he did was use the claws to rip his stupid collar off. Neteri didn't exactly appreciate that, and, after spending the night with his wrists chained behind his back, he was gifted a thick metal collar in the morning, which was just…lovely.
Maybe she was right about him not being trustworthy.
"So, what, we're gonna walk around and I'm gonna be your little slave boy?" Castys asked as they made their way through the palace's hallways.
Neteri shrugged. "Something like that. People aren't really going to pay you any mind. Slaves are common enough here."
"Do other people take their slaves for walks like dogs?"
"No, because other people aren't as nice as me," Neteri said proudly.
"Right, of course. I'm very grateful that you cut my arm off and then did a shit job of putting a new one on."
"Okay," Neteri sighed, "I get it. How about I turn the leash invisible, is that enough for you?"
Castys didn't give much of a shit about what random city people thought, mainly just bothered by the pull of the thing on his neck, but…"If you do are you still gonna drag me around by it? It'd look pretty fucking stupid."
"I guess not, so…here." She grabbed his right hand, the links of chain sort of balled up between their palms. "That's not too much touching for you, is it?"
"I can live with it." It was a hell of a lot better than the alternative, and he didn't mind his hands being touched, really. He had to shake a lot of hands with a lot of random people back in his old life, so he was used it. Neteri did her invisible-leash magic, and they continued on their way.
Outside was bright, which was not surprising, but he still had to blink a few times. Fuck, he…he forgot how nice the sun felt. He hadn't even considered the actual outside part of being outside, and it was pretty nice. The sun, the birds, the salty sea breeze, the little lady tugging him along to somewhere…
"So where exactly are we going?" he asked, glancing down streets as they passed them by.
"The seaside market. They have the best food stalls in the city. I don't really have a particalur one in mind, though, so if you see something you want just let me know."
"Sounds good." Castys's stomach grumbled, and he found himself feeling a bit excited. He was going to get good food and get to look at the ocean, which he'd always had a fascination with. He made trips to the seaside when he could back home, but there was always a part of him that longed to hop on a boat and sail away. He…he could do that today, if he played his cards right. Get away from Neteri somehow and stow away until he got discovered and then be forced to work so he didn't get thrown overboard-
Wait, why did his escape daydream end in him basically being a slave again? Could he really not imagine just being free? He tried, but he realized he had no idea what he would do. Freedom to do what he wanted was sort of a foreign concept, now that he thought about it. Most of his life had been dictated by his parents, his future set in stone, never allowed room to even dream of another destiny. But then that other destiny came and it was a brand on his chest and a metal collar around his neck and he still didn't have control over a single fucking thing.
And you would think the idea of finally having control would be attractive but it wasn't it was overwhelming and nauseating and he was a little relieved when the ship's captain caught him and told him to scrub the deck because at least he knew what he needed to do he didn't have to sit there and try to come up with something he'd never had to before he probably wasn't even good at it he wasn't built for it he was just supposed to be-
"-ou alright? Castys?" Neteri was looking up at him, concern in her eyes. She'd pulled them into a quiet side street without him realizing it.
His mouth was dry, and he wondered if he'd been breathing quickly. He swallowed. "Um, yeah, I think I just…got overwhelmed for a second." He plastered a smile on his face. "I'm fine now."
Neteri frowned slightly. "If you say so. Just let me know if this is too much and you want to go back, okay?"
Castys huffed and rolled his eyes. "Trust me, I'm not gonna want to go back."
"I suppose you won't. But, just so you know," she took a step closer, and then another, backing him against a wall as her arm rose up to pin down his neck, "if you try to run, there will be consequences." All the kindness was gone from her voice, her words as cold as her gaze. "No one will help you, and, if they do, they will be breaking the law. You are legally my property, no matter if you believe it or not. And when you are caught, which you will be," her other hand slid under his shirt, pressing against his stomach, and Castys couldn't help but tense up, "I will cut you open and take a good, long look at all of your organs." Her fingers slid upwards, the lightness of her touch making his skin crawl. "Is that clear?" Her hand stopped above his heart, which was pounding a lot faster than he'd like it to.
His eyes darted around, searching for someone, anyone who was watching, who saw him being fucking threatened in broad daylight. But no one gave a shit. That stupid fucking collar was all they needed to see, and suddenly this was okay. He was less than human, after all. Left with no other choice, Castys looked Neteri in the eye and nodded. "Y-yes. Yes, ma'am."
Neteri's demeanor changed completely, and she stepped back, beaming. "Good boy!" She took his hand once more, pulling him along like none of that had just happened. "We're almost there! I'm sure you're hungry."
Castys's appetite had disappeared, but smelling things would probably bring it back, so he nodded. "I'm known for my huge stomach, so you better be ready." This was supposed to be his day, so Neteri better be ready to get him whatever he damn pleased.
Just as soon as he shook off the feeling of her hand under his shirt.
Finally, the buildings gave way to the vast expanse of the ocean, the docks stretching out into the blue crowded with sailors and workers, crates of cargo and coils of rope, the stalls lining the edge of the street busy with vendors advertising their food to hungry passerby. All it took was for Castys to lay eyes on a beautiful, glistening skewer of beef for his appetite to come roaring back. He pointed at it, excited for the first time in ages.
"I've found our first target."
They wove through the crowd, waiting in line after line as Castys saw another thing he'd like to try, only stopping once they couldn't carry any more. They settled down on a ledge by the docks, and Castys took a moment to go over their haul.
His first love, the beef skewer, which he'd had a few bites of in line for other food. The meat had melted in his mouth, juicy and spicy and just pure bliss. Then, there were fried shrimp with a curry sauce all wrapped up in a flaky flatbread, a bowl of noodles stir-fried with pork and vegetables, sticks of crispy potato with a garlic sauce, and a thick mango and yogurt drink.
Every bite was better than the last, and Castys couldn't help but kick his legs back and forth a little bit as he chewed. Neteri watched him with a warm smile, clearly enjoying her food as well. Castys's eyes wandered as he ate, and he ended up watching a strong sailor lady unloading some cargo. She made moving those heavy boxes look effortless, unless they were empty and it was actually effortless. Either way, she had a cool headband and some awesome fire ink designs of sea monsters on her arms. He'd be happy to serve under her in his new sailor escape fantasies.
"You have good taste in women." Neteri was following his gaze with a dreamy sort of smile. What did she mean by…oh, that kind of taste. That kind of tracked for her, now that he thought about it. But as for him…
"Huh? Oh, I just thought she looked cool. I…I don't really have a taste in women."
Neteri cocked her head slightly, smiling openly. "Taste in men, then?"
Castys swallowed. She probably wouldn't care, right? It's not like it mattered for her experiment. "No, I just…don't." He stared at his feet, not wanting to see her reaction.
"Well, nothing wrong with that." Neteri said casually, taking another bite. Castys blinked, slowly turning to look at her, mouth falling open slightly. Nothing…wrong? Neteri noticed him staring and gave him a concerned look. "You okay, Castys?"
"I…" he leaned back, looking at the sky. "No one's ever said that to me before. My parents…it was the one thing that upset them that I wasn't doing on purpose." Their words echoed in his head, the yells that he was broken and faking it and not a real man hurting far more than any insults directed at him for bad behavior. "Are you sure there's not something wrong with me?" he asked quietly.
Neteri huffed, shaking her head. "Of course not. That's just how you are, and you're not the only one who's like that. You don't have to like people or get married or anything if you don't want to. It's perfectly normal."
Normal. He wasn't sure if he even knew what normal was, between his royal upbringing and his demon body parts. Still, while Neteri's opinion of things wasn't always the most trustworthy, maybe…maybe she was right about this. He'd rather believe her over his parents, anyway.
"Have you…have you ever actually met anyone like me? I just always sort of figured I was the only one." It sounded silly now that he said it out loud, but it's not like the topic ever came up when he met people.
"I have! My little brother doesn't really experience attraction, either. He just wants to live with his best friend forever. There are a few people I met in medical school who feel that way, too. So you're really not alone, okay?"
Castys couldn't help but smile, warm relief replacing the tension in his muscles. "Thanks." He didn't want to get too sappy, so he shoved noodles in his mouth. Thinking more about that could happen later when he was in bed and also by himself.
Neteri was impressed when he finished all of his food, and the look on her face when he said he still had room for dessert was priceless. Even so, she insisted he needed a little time to digest, giving the excuse that there were better sweets stands to be found along the cliff face at the back of the city.
So off they went, wandering through the maze of streets, stopping to look at whatever weird things she thought were significant, which included a dusty-ass bookstore, an old poster that she thought was hilarious for some reason, and, the coolest thing, a bunch of different rocks from around the world. If dealing with foreign representatives had involved more cool rocks, Castys might have actually paid attention to the discussions he'd sat in on growing up. Alas, it was all trade agreements.
Finally, they reached the market along the cliff face, and the bustle here was even more overwhelming than the docks had been. There were all sorts of crafts and magic tools and baskets of spices and, best of all, sugary fried stuff.
Castys examined his options carefully, in the end deciding to go with sweet little fried dough balls that came with a creamy vanilla dipping sauce. They were amazing, but his hands and face got all sticky, and Neteri laughed at him for getting custard on his nose. He got his revenge the moment she grabbed his hand again, rubbing his sticky fingers all over the back of her hand.
"You have got to be the grossest prince I've ever met," Neteri mumbled as she used her water magic to clean them both off.
"I try my best." Castys grinned, taking the insult as a compliment. His eyes wandered as she cleaned in between his fingers, a particularly colorful stall catching his eye. If that's what he thought is was…he could at least ask, right? "So, you know, I've been a very good boy, I think."
Raising an eyebrow, she looked up at him. "For the most part."
"Right. So, like, I'm full, and I'm very grateful for all of the food, but if there was, um, something I could get to have later…?" He flashed his most innocent smile.
Neteri relaxed slightly. "Such as? I don't know what's going to keep well, except for…" she looked around, stopping and smiling when she realized what he was talking about. "Sure, I'll get you some candy."
"Epic." Castys eagarly pulled her over to the candy stall, already weighing his options, wondering how many pieces he could get, and what he even wanted.
"You can get five," Neteri sighed, almost sounding like a tired mother. Five was enough for Castys, and, despite his initial idea of getting a wide variety, he settled on five different flavors of candy sticks. They were decently sized, but not so big he couldn't fit the whole thing in his mouth, which was important. You had to be able to have a hands-free enjoyment experience, but be able to take a break and talk or something using the stick to take it out. Castys usually kept the stick in his mouth long after the candy was gone so he could feel like one of those cool guys who sucked on grass without actually having to have grass sticking out of his mouth.
"I get the other flavors, but you're really getting one with a cricket in it?" Neteri asked as they walked away from the stand, putting his candy sticks in her bag.
"I've never eaten a cricket. I want to see what it's like to be a lizard."
Neteri giggled, giving him a slightly confused look. "I guess it's too bad I'm not turning you into a lizard then, huh?"
"If you were I would accept my destiny more readily." Which was true, he would enjoy laying on a warm rock in the sun for extended periods. He looked over at the stripey cliff face, wondering how many lizards were skittering around on there. For the first time, he noticed all the people gathered around the base of it, laying their hands on the dark crystals randomly embedded in the surface. "What's up with that?" he asked, pointing.
"Oh, that's where people send their energy and prayers up to the Midnight Sun." Upon seeing Castys's blank expression, Neteri continued. "That big symbol in the cliff. It lights up at night thanks to people's energy. It's believed that prayers said while touching one of the stones are sent up to the sun. Do you want to try it?"
Castys had never been the spiritual type, but he was curious about the wall itself, so he could think some thoughts to the ball in sky while he was at it. "Sure, I guess."
The cliff was sandstone, upon closer inspection, which wasn't shocking, but the crystals in the surface…he wasn't sure what exactly they were. Definitely added by people, at the very least, and probably fire element minerals since they made shit glow. Which was why he was here.
Castys put his hand on one of the crystals, thinking. This was basically like making a wish, right? He was apparently too much of a little bitch to run, so wishing for freedom was stupid. Maybe he should wish for some fucking direction on…on anything. Or he could wish to be a lizard who just got to scuttle around and eat bugs and not be expected to do anything. Or he could wish for a million more candy sticks. Or he could wish for something that was remotely realistic, just in case it might come true.
Dear the sun, please make it so I don't have to wear this stupid collar for the rest of my life. It's uncomfortable. Also I want to go on a boat at least once. Sincirely, Castys.
Good enough. He stepped back, a tiny bit woozy from leaving his hand on the crystal for too long. Neteri had already finished, so with that done, they headed…back towards the palace. It was getting sort of late, and he'd known they wouldn't stay out all day, but…
"Did you have a good day, Castys? Have enough good food?" Neteri gave his hand a squeeze.
"Yeah. I'm very full and in a little bit of pain but it was worth it." Manners might be a good idea since Neteri cut him open all the time. "Thanks for the food and stuff."
"Of course! I hope this makes it up to you after that whole mess with your arm."
"Nah, that'll take at least a hundred more candy sticks."
Neteri laughed. "I'll keep that in mind. Now I know where to buy them."
"I expect regular deliveries. No excuses." Maybe he'd be a better test subject if he got little treats more often. He could certainly be persuaded.
"Understood. I won't let you down." Neteri opened the door to the palace, gesturing for him to go first.
After taking one last glance at the city behind him, Castys turned and walked inside, the collar around his neck shifting as he let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.
The day outside was over, and his chance to escape was gone.
He wished he was a little more upset by that, but as Neteri led him back to his cell, all he felt was relief.
AU taglist: @vampiresprite @whump-in-the-closet
Castys Cult: @as-a-matter-of-whump @blackrosesandwhump @fanmanga1357-blog @thehopelessopus @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi
@hearse-song @muddy-swamp-bitch @whumpasaurus101 @yet-another-heathen @galaxywhump
@starnight-whump @his-unspoken-words @misspelledwitch @suspicious-whumping-egg @pumpkin-spice-whump
@painsandconfusion @i-can-even-burn-salad @befuddled-calico-whump @whumpinggrounds @whump-queen
@whumpedydump
#i wrote something#castys & terror au#castys#neteri#dehumanization#noncon touching#castys would lose his mind at the state fair 100%#man now i want a lemon shake up that shit slap#yeah he did it he ripped off the leather collar and has a metal one now#he's very grumpy about it but i dont know what the fuck he expected#neteri thinks she is soooooo nice which like i guess you arent cruel and terrible#but you are keeping that man locked in a room and forever altering his body#like girl. think about this.#hehe castys doesnt run because he's never actually been in control of himself before#he needs someone to tell him what to do and where to go or he starts fucking panicking#anD THEN NETERI SEES HIM PANICKING. AND AFTER HE CALMS DOWN SHE THREATENS HIM LIKE ?????#tbh i just didnt know where else to put the threat because it did need to happen#but it's kind of funny she just does that after he was freaking out a bit like kick him while he's down i guess#hngnggn beef stick...kind of based on filipino bbq pork i had once and kind of based on brazilian steak skewer another time#i dont like shrimp but castys does and i wanted something to be in the flatbread they have a lot of flatbread utensil in taiyorum#stir fry is based on the stir fry place that always has a stupid long line at gencon it's so funny#french fries are the ones i got in auckland the had garlic aioli and i still think about them sometimes#and then mango lassi because Yeah. Yeah i love her#castys doesnt think the poster is funny f in chat#he get his lollipops now!! he is a very good boy if he gets lollipops
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one of the things that gets me about fanon lens - especially when you entrench yourself so much in a fan version of a character - is how a character can just slowly be stripped of what they are and who they are because of the self referential nature of fanworks (which isn't inherently bad, don't misunderstand; neglected characters can have new life breathed into them)
which is a long way of getting to: where did people get the idea that estinien's not one to talk, or is bad at effectively talking? I don't mean selectively mute hcs, i mean just very curt. like he's not as flowery as many of the scions or even compared to aymeric, but he's still dramatic and talks a lot. he's precise when he needs to be and extremely blunt, but just because of that doesn't mean he won't ramble
like his whole tangent about where he is today because of the wol right before the Dead Ends in Ultima Thule. his chattiness seems to fluctuate with how comfortable he is with someone, so i'm not really sure where "estinien's bad with words" came from?
he's no politician, but he's good at saying what needs to be said and saying it in a way that matters. yes, there is the whole aymeric thing but avoiding a difficult conversation rooted in guilt isn't the same as being bad at talking. he clearly knows how to get to people - especially to antagonize them into action (see: tiamat, azdaja) - so where did this come from?
#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#estinien#original#again: this is not knocking mute or selectively mute hcs. this is about the people who think he's bad with words#i really suspect it has a lot to do with the similar thought of him being illiterate must mean he's stupid#we don't know his literacy level. he was a farm boy so its not aymerics level but hes not inherently illiterate#and even if he was that doesn't mean he's dumb. he's extremely emotionally intelligent and how he communicates shows that#but in order for it to show he has to be good at word intentionality and this fanon idea is the exact opposite#he's not dumb? he also talks a lot but he's very good at saying what needs to be said#none of that says bad at words or speaking like fanon thinks#its p squarely the opposite. he just has interpersonal communication issues#which is an entirely different thing and screams neurodivergent but leave me alone#im just saying like#idk give him a break and stop finding ways to make him stupid because you think rural means uneducated and uneducated adult funny
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Is this late? Yes. But in my defence coloring was a bitch and i was very tired. Anyway have Scam and Jodie art.
#dungeons and daddies#dndads#scam likely#scam actually#jodie foster#scam x jodie#i am still not fully happy with the result but its fine#also listening to boys night from dimension 20 and god the second hand emberessment is real i have to skip so much#like i am not saying the girls have the brain cells but when riz is with the group he and adaine seem to have brain cells#(they dont its just the nerd factor) but when removed from the group the boys are very stupid and awkward#and i am cringing very hard its really good tho#but like more about the piece i really liked that reveal it is very batshit insane and feels very dndads ya know#my art
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Thing is I enjoyed DP&W in the moment but going back and watching the first two Deadpool movies I'm really curious how tf we got from literally traveling through time to save her life to Wade and Vanessa being broken up. Not to mention the absolute stupidity of her dating someone from work...not unrealistic but please tell us what Vanessa works as. Please, Disney, tell us. where does Vanessa work. Disney. Tell us where Vanessa works, disney. hey, disney. can you say it? Where Deadpool's wife works??
#also where tf where cable and domino? and why was shatterstar there he was supposed to be dead#and russel!!! where was the boy!!!#overall a decent movie once you're in the thick of it but the plot is so stupid and it's just not as good as the previous ones#like better than anything else in the mcu has been in a while or will be in a while but still. very marvel. not quite as deadpool#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool spoilers#deadpool and wolverine spoilers
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every time someone is like “x is stealing baela’s inheritance” i want to scream bc you could not be more obviously purposefully missing one of the key parts of the dance conflict just to be like “well tb is sexist too” yeah yeah yeah but…do you think that if baela decided to flip against the side fighting to crown a woman and then make baela herself queen to the side that is looking very specifically to cut every single woman out of any inheritance whatsoever and only be worth what their womb is capable of pushing out for whatever king sets his sights on is maybe like,,,,,,, NOT in her benefit??? and in fact baela herself would never see driftmark OR the iron throne as hers regardless of who has died specifically because the side who was looking to overthrow a reigning queen they are constantly calling a whore was the one that managed to last the longest (not WIN but LAST there’s a difference bc no one won but jaehaerys the bitch) and therefore dictate the way the way inheritance laws work by using their distaste for one (1) woman and applying it to every single woman ever ARE in fact the ones to blame for ~usurping~ baela?????
#THERE WAS NOTHIJG STOPPING AEGON FROM NAMING BAELA HIS HEIR#DO YOU KNOW WHY HE NAMED THE SON OF HIS HATED SISTER INSTEAD. YOU ONLY GET ONE GUESS BC ITS OBVIOUS!!!#people do this w cregan and rhaenyra’s boys. she doesn’t HAVE an inheritance. why do you think she’s so interested in RHAENYRA’S???#neither the velaryons nor cregan are depriving her of anything and aegon the elder winning the initial war in fact dooms her to NEVER#inherit jack shit just like it dooms every other woman. bc regardless of rhaenyra’s worthiness. most of the greens are fighting TO PRESERVE#WOMEN NEVER INHERITING. it’s why aegon doesn’t name JAEHAERA OVER AEGON THE YOUNGER. HE WON AND HE FUCKED HIS OWN DAUGHTER IN THE PROCESS#it’s almost as if this is a patriarchy and the greens are very purposefully using rhaenyra’s faults to paint every woman with the same brus#WHY ARE WE BEING SILLY AND STUPID WITH THIS.#it would be like me trying to say joff is a good king. he objectively sucks. aegon outliving nyra objectively sucks bc the greens are#objectively a misogynistic group of shitheels. it’s fine!!!!!!! they’re interesting misogynist shitheels!!!!!!!! but that’s what they are!!#IM SORRY FOR DISCOURSING BUT ITS SO ANNOYING. how often people just refuse to engage with the entire fucking core of the conflict#for this baby shit ‘well cregan & the velaryon boys usurped baela’ no they didn’t you’re a moron!!!!#getting on my soap box
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I also just love wei wuxians ridiculous "fight more people while you still can" guidance in general because it is a) truly horrible advice, and b) distinctly similar to my father telling me in high school that I can fight people if I want I just have to do it after school so I don't get in trouble
#its so funny every time wei wuxian is both so good and so fucking bad with kids I love him#in a very stupid way he's also kind of right even tho its ultimately terrible advice to give a 16 year old boy#ghost posts#text#wwx
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2023 reads
Wren Martin Ruins It All
YA contemporary romcom
student council president proposes to cut the school valentine’s dance because it's expensive and alienating for queer/single people, but instead the vice president (who he adamantly hates for being perfect) suggests they get sponsored by a popular friendship app
he decides to secretly give the app a go to “know his enemy” but ends up making a friend, and starts to catch feelings for him...and maybe realises the guy he hates isn't actually so bad either...
ace mlm MC, aro-questioning side character
I loved this so much! great MC with a funny internal monologue
despite the title most issues or misunderstanding are sorted out pretty quickly rather than drawn out for the drama and plot. which is refreshing
I was a little nervous about the concept of ‘ace hates the school dance and wants it shut down’ - there's a bit of a stereotype of aspecs being boring Fun Haters - but I think it did a really good job of showing the specifics of why, not dragging it out, and also that he’s just a snarky fun hater in general with not much weight behind it.
There’s also no discovering of sexuality or big coming out (just one-on-one) - he already knows he’s ace, and it comes up naturally a bunch, talking about how dances etc can feel isolating, the way the friendship app called buddy being called ace-friendly can feel infantilizing, avoiding dating because of the stress of having to check upfront if people about it, etc.
I would have liked to know more about his relationship with his mum? Though I understand that it’s clearly something he avoids thinking about - going too deep into his relationship with his parents might have changed the tone a lot. but still.
ARC from netgalley thanks netgalley
#wren martin ruins it all#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#asexual books#ngl as soon as i was like oh this boy is elliot schafer coded i was a lost cause#(re aro character - I have noticed a bit of a trend of “maybe aromantic but I don’t like labels” in YA#contemporary recently that I don’t love - but it’s not an inherent issue with this book)#I’ve read a lot of YA contemporary books where the portrayal of social media and made up apps doesn’t feel right; but this one did to me!#maybe it’s because it’s from the POV of someone’s who’s cynical about it.#(and types no punctuation no capitalisation…I could see my online-communication style reflected back at me…)#Even the confrontation at the end where feelings are confessed isn’t made into some big dramatic thing in front of everyone with no#communication. But it also doesn’t feel emotionally anticlimactic.#(maybe a couple of the reveals in the confession felt unnecessarily dramatic to me? like the story would have functioned without them. )#but it's common for comtemporary ya to overdramatise silly things for the plot and im glad this didn't#possibly this is just my adult opinion about teen narratives.#The adult characters (even though they’re mostly background) feel like real people.#and it has some good friendships. also he has chickens and they are very good#it did become increasingly obvious that it was the same ppl but also they’re emotionally stupid. and like….it's part of the genre.#we all know this going in.
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From Antti Tuisku's Instagram
Antti: "it's the main day! Just enjoy it from the bottom of your heart, the whole gang! Ps. Jere is one of the most amazing and sympathetic people I've ever met in music business! That's part of the reason why it's been so amazing to follow his journey in Eurovision. Pure love!"
Käärijä: "Thank you ana. You're wonderful, I'm just a fool"
They recently released a song together:
#käärijä#antti tuisku#antti is the biggest pop star this country has ever had he's been doing music for almost 20 years#they're besties 🥹❤️#hölmö could also be translated to stupid goof idiot or moron but it's like a cute gentle way of saying that someone is a lil dumb#like if your pet does something silly you'd say it's hölmö#my translation isn't perfect but good enough#im also a bit hölmö#the song auto jää is about how you shouldn't drive while drunk#basically translates to car stays behind#very responsible bois 👍#Spotify
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Photos I took of my pets as a child in the 90s
#it’s so hard to look at these photos#I’m hoping maybe putting them here will help me face the pain and trauma associated with them#I think it’s especially painful because they were all such sweethearts#actual angels who were so gentle and patient with baby me#if i could go back in time and save all of them I fucking would 😭#max the malamute 🖤#best boy in the world he was such a good dog#my cousins family gave me him as a puppy#the torties were named Romeo and Juliet (even tho they were both boys 🤣)#(yeah boy torties are from the same litter! idk what happened! 🤣)#Garfield was the orange cat (and mama to the torties)#best girl in the world so sweet. she was almost completely deaf and blind#German shepherd was buddy#sweet playful boy 🖤#I didn’t get to know him very well because he (all my pets did) lived with my dad and at that point I stopped going to his house a lot#bear was the rottie#sweet boy he died really tragically my dad loved animals but was fucking stupid sometimes#and the black puppy… also died really tragically. never even lived long enough to get a name.#some of these might be pushing into 00-4 maybe#the ones of buddy are probably from then because I’m pretty sure we got him while I was in middle school#I drafted this post a few months ago and honestly doing this + writing about them really did help me process my feelings towards them#so now I’m ready to share :)#I just love the idea of seeing the world through a child’s eyes#this is what little me thought was important! lol
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