#he is NOT giving up on his dream of performing in south america | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thisisntmyrightera · 2 years ago

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Idol? no thanks, i'm the hellfire princes! | Joseph Quinn x Kpop Idol

SUMMARY: While living your dream of being an idol in South Korea you accidentally reveal who your crush is on a Vlive and your fans start doing their job for you to meet them.

Note: This idea came after a friend ask me about what would happen if this were real, the reader is of legal age

Words: 2,851

Note: English isn't my first language, so i make my best.

All interactions are well received and appreciated.

Thanks for reading!

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- I've trained a lot these days and I'm also rehearsing for the next tour so please come to see us - you smiled at your phone reading the comments that appeared on the screen that came from followers of your group around the world

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Pr33tie123: Did you like Ateez's comeback? Rosievmp: Will you come to America? y/naroundtheworld: Did you dye your hair? It looks darker, I love it! millie4everlv: Did you see the new season Stranger Things?

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- I hope we can go to America soon - Your eyes moved between the comments smiling trying not to drop any spoilers that could compromise you in the next tour dates - Yes! - You smiled excitedly reading the Stranger Things message - I've been watching it with Min-Ju and the truth is that we love it sooooo much, I don't think we can wait for volume 2

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oliviaweeh: Who is your favorite character? flourwer: Eddie must definitely be her favorite, she's always had a thing for tough guys.

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-My favorite?...-you looked to one side of your room while you hugged your pillow thinking- I think Eddie, he is my favorite because he makes me feel comfortable, definitely Eddie is very close to the type of boy that I like both physically and in his feelings and definitely if he were real I would give him a chance - you smiled biting your lip - oh I have to show you something - you got up carefully not to drop your cellphone from the position in which you had it accommodated going to your closet taking your Hellfire shirt coming back happily showing it to the camera - Yunho Sunbaenim gave me this when he found out I was obsessed with Eddie, I've been wearing it for rehearsals because it's so comfortable.

That night your live ended with many good comments and some others asking you to focus on your career and leave the "games" of love for a character, all normal if you remembered the environment of your career.

Taking advantage that the new song of your group had come out and you were in the last days of promotion, the agency decided to upload a video on social networks with a dance practice where your position as the center of dance was noted throughout the video while you were wearing your Hellfire shirt, making the comment box filled with good comments about how coordinated and well trained they were but also how they stole the attention.

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Sarah Lee: Y/N is definitely the queen of Hellfire JooShin12: Somebody tell Y/N to stop wearing that shirt or we'll have to change the lightstick to one with Hellfire's colors. Y/g/n4ever: Someone show this to Joseph Quinn, SAP! ArmyXy/f/n: Why is she so perfect? now i'm fighting between her and joseph because i love them both.

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Quickly 4 weeks passed and the tour began, Asia had its first dates, then a couple more in Europe until arriving in London, if someone had told you 3 years ago that one day you would be performing at Wembley you would never believe it, you were a girl with almost impossible dreams and in your type you were the first to make them come true and succeed with your 6 friends and colleagues, it was the moment of your life, you could not expect anything better because you already had everything

-Hello, welcome! - you smiled greeting the fans who passed in front of you and the other girls at the fan meeting they had hours before the concert

-I brought you something, a small gift - One of the girls who had beautiful hair dyed pink smiled at you nervously as she sat in front of you taking out of her bag a small stuffed bat with a bandana - it's Eddie Bat, I did it for you because I know you like that character a lot just like me

-Oh my god - you smiled excitedly taking it carefully looking at the details - you did it? I love him too much

-Yes, I sewed the bat and then I added the bandana to make it look like Eddie's -the girl looked at you excitedly holding her album to be signed with a slight shake in her hands when you were in front

One after another they sat down in front of you giving you small gifts, some sweets, small boxes of chocolate milk, a headband with a pair of bat wings, a T-shirt with the legend ''Hellfire Princess'', Eddie's pins made by one fan and even replicated the bandana he wore in the Upside Down. There were dozens of gifts that multiplied among 7 members became hundreds but yours were well recognized, each of you had a well-defined personality and your company respected that, but among hundreds of pink stuffed animals and sweet posters your gifts with bats were well identified.

-Are you ready? - Your manager's voice rang loud in the dressing room while the microphones were connected, the last strands of hair were arranged and you prepared to go on stage - let's do it right girls! fighting!!

That was the final signal, the steps towards the stage were not new but they always made you nervous while your hands moved around your body rectifying that everything was in its place and your whole outfit was complete.

The screams around Wembley were intense, so much so that they shook the ground under your feet as you took your position breathing deeply trying to erase your nerves, the two most intense hours of your day were coming and you had to do it perfectly.

-Hey come...come- Aria took your hand smiling as she moved her microphone away from her lips- someone came to see you

-Who? - you smiled putting away your microphone following her curiously looking at the public waving

-Look, there - she smiled excitedly pointing to the crowd making you look carefully, narrowing your eyes by the light of the spotlights - can you see?

-Oh my...-you looked at her, covering your embarrassed mouth, avoiding screaming to return your gaze and greet embarrassedly, making a small bow, how could it be possible? Millie, Natalia, Charlie and Joseph in the same place as you? Looking at you? would they have noticed when you nearly lost your breath on your high note? when you tripped through the water on the stage floor? when a fan in the front row threw a stuffed toy for WooJeon and you decided to kidnap them by running all over the stage?

Now all your movements were subtly taken care of, the 80 thousand people had been reduced to one... Joseph Quinn who was looking at you and you didn't know where to hide all the nerves that were growing inside your body, it wasn't possible.

-You can do it, the worst is over, he already knows that you admire him-your leader approached you perfectly reading your body movements hugging you while he laughed to comfort you

-I feel so tiny - you laughed hugging her to leave her quickly and run to your position because you knew the part of the choreography planned for the end of the song was coming.

After a few minutes your mind cleared up a bit to continue with the show in routine, your accelerated breathing was noticeable in your chest and the sweat that ran down your forehead felt cool against your skin while you continued doing more and more dance steps that ended with the screams of the fans and the thousands of lightsticks in front of you were waving frantically.

This was your dream? totally and you enjoyed it in every second that passed!

Finally the two hours ended and after saying goodbye to the public one by one of you went down, your turn was almost in the middle one so you ran to the dressing room to drink some water and also ask the doctor who accompanied you on tour for help, your right ankle It was starting to hurt again and they had to check it out to rule out an injury.

-Girls, we must recover a little, please take a breath, drink water, we are going to greet some guests - your manager called you while he was holding his phone

Shit...shit shit, guests, that's what how staff call celebrities who attend events and let them go behind the stage to greet you.

-Just relax! -Your leader laughed wiping her sweat with a towell as she walked calling the girls

Relaxed? of course you should be relaxed, you were one of the older members, you should show maturity and calm in front of the maknaes

-I'm going! - You sighed tired taking the hand of one of your members walking carefully towards the other room where part of the staff was already with the guests, actors and athletes, some were there as fans and others had taken their children to see their show.

-Hello, nice to meet you - you smiled kindly and excitedly posing with each of the guests in group photographs, signing autographs and receiving compliments on your dancing and singing posing in photos where they only asked you to appear with them

And almost at the back there were them looking at all of you smiling, part of the UK cast of Stranger Things waiting their turn

-Shit - you whispered feeling a thousand butterflies beating furiously in your stomach but smiling as your years of training had teach you to deal with situations like this - Hi- you greeted kindly one by one walking behind your members

-I know you - Joseph smiled looking at you with his cheeks flushed

-Yes, I also know you- you smile shy making your members laugh when looking at you nervously

-I told the guys that I have received thousands of messages everywhere talking about your group but especially about you, about how much you love Eddie and honestly, I don't want to sound rude but I had never listen your music before but as soon as I started to see all this comments and videos that the fans show me I like your music and I couldn't stop and I had to download all your music on my Spotify and then I became a big fan and here I am

-We are here for him, he didn't want to come alone - Natalia joked taking Charlie's arm making everyone laugh breaking the tension and nerves

-We hope you liked our show; we made a lot of effort so that you enjoyed it - your leader speak making you just settle down interlocking your hands on your lap listening attentively with your eyes on your shoes feeling that the floor was spinning

-It was totally great, I had never come to a show where they emanate so much energy, really your songs are so catchy, I am definitely your fan and I need one of those lights that your fans use, they are totally beautiful - Millie spoke euphorically as she normally does making you and the members laugh shy, some covering their mouths and you swaying on your feet a bit noticing how sweet she was.

-Do you think if we take a picture before we leave? -Natalia smiled showing her cell phone and handing it to someone from the staff so that she could capture the moment

It was funny and difficult to include 11 people in the image but after some knelt down and others settled in the back the image came out perfect, realizing at the end that you were between Joseph and Millie feeling nervous.

-Do you mind if we take a picture together? I never post anything on my instagram but I really want to do it this time - Joseph looked at you shy with a tender smile

-Yes, of course - you smiled back nervously approaching him while Charlie took Joseph's cell phone and settled in front of you

It was a matter of seconds before both of you found the perfect pose, Joseph's right arm perfectly accommodated around your waist, your head slightly tilted towards his side while one of your legs was carefully bent making you look sweet next to him.

-Another one - Charlie smiled enjoying the moment

-As in Hellfire-Joseph looked at you smiling raising his fingers towards his head doing the iconic pose of Eddie with horns while you imitated him both sticking out their tongue a little staring at the camera

-You guys look so adorable - Charlie laughed looking at them showing you the image and returning the cell phone to Joseph to go back to Natalia

-While I was watching one of the videos of you even at the concert you made a sign, it's something like...- Joseph laughed trying to form a heart with his fingers making you laugh too at how adorable he looked trying

-Oh it's something like this, it's a heart that is made a lot in Korea- you took his hand careful accommodating his fingers- something like that

-Ahh I understand - he smiled at you, putting his phone a little up where you and him could be together again in the image, while you leaned on his shoulder forming the same heart making the most adorable selca in the history of your group - I like this one a lot - he smiled again blushing looking at you - do you mind if I upload them to my social networks?

-Nono, you can do it, it's fine - you looked at him nervously pressing your lips trying to stop smiling

-I will, I promise- his eyes looking at the cell phone while he looked at the pictures finally made you smile a little looking too

-This is my favorite - you pointed shy to the image where both of them did the Eddie pose

-You like? I can send it to you if you want- he looked at you with a certain sparkle in his eyes, making you nod excitedly-why not...give me your number and I'll send it to you later

-Sure - would you get in trouble? Maybe yes, the ban on couples was from the big agencies and what could be wrong with it? Already some members were dating boys in Korea, there would be nothing wrong if you had a friend in London...right? So why not take a chance?

Joseph typed your number on his cell phone saving it with your name and a small pink flower emoji next to him showing you so that you would give him your approval smiling when he saw you nod

-Y/N we have to go - your leader called you while the other members said goodbye giving small bows and waving their hands walking towards their dressing room

-Yes, of course - you agreed looking again at Joseph smiling at him embarrassed- I need to go, it was a pleasure to meet you

-The pleasure was totally mine, you're great - he hugged you making you do it too and then slowly let go and you will walk back saying goodbye to the other people entering your dressing room

Not much time later, when while you were on your way to the hotel your cell phone started to ring like crazy, all your social networks were saturated with messages, comments, everyone was crazy and you didn't know the reason why, or maybe you did?

-Wooo look at your instagram- WooJeon shouted excitedly jumping on her seat making you quickly take out your phone and your eyes widened

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-Joseph Quinn has started following you -9,028 new followers - 2,9732 new likes -Joseph Quinn tagged you in a post

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-I must leave the country - you laughed covering your nervous face making your members laugh hugging you

-You're in love??? -Your leader laughed annoying you while she tried to look at your face

-Nooo - you laughed again covering yourself embarrassed looking at your phone

Joseph Quinn: As long as we're not in a band, or in science, or parties, the princess of Hellfire and I will continue to enjoy the most metal concert ever. @y/username keep surrounding yourself with bats, they look good on you.

-That's flirting, it's totally flirting! - Min-Ju laughed pushing you slowly excited - he liked you!

-Shut up - you laughed embarrassed covering your face but lowering your hand a little to read the comments

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Hellfireanne: My parents met, you can adopt me now Y/g/n4ever: This is a multiverse? This is possible? my bias and the dungeon master in the same photo. Josephquinnsource: They definitely have chemistry, please respect her, let's not scare her away from Joseph. y/npinkybow: Y/N Wake up! WE TOTALLY LIKE THIS!

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-Look at her, her face is going to explode, it's so red- the maknae spoke from behind the truck laughing

-Leave me alone -you laughed looking at them returning your attention to your phone when you heard it ring with a notification

Unknow number: Y/N can you hear me?, wake up! ♥

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godlygreta · 3 years ago

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la belle fleur sauvage | s. kiszka.

title | la belle fleur sauvage

summary | you missed sam so much. so so much.

warnings | mentions of sex, slight smut, very fluffy otherwise

word count | 2.8K+

author’s note | i just needed this, okay? i started writing on my computer and i literally couldn’t stop. i have such a big soft spot for sammy. i love him so much and i hope he has the greatest day today, tomorrow, and always

here’s jake’s: mystery of love

here’s danny’s: heavenly

here’s josh’s: tiny dancer

The thunder squandered your mood a little, having outside chores to do. Since buying a house with Sam, the two of you divided up random household chores. When he was away on tour, however, you ended up doing everything. While you had no issue with it, watching Sam do something as simple as the dishes made your heart swell. Watching him be so domestic just made you excited for the future.

He had been gone for almost six months this time, being able to tour all around America, Europe, Asia and even dipping into South America. He texted you every day, sending you pictures of his many adventures. Sometimes it would be a selfie of him and Jake, or him and Danny. Most of the time though it would be pictures of the coolest things he had seen that day. Those cool things ranged from the way their food was plated at lunch to the way the skyline looked while the sun was setting.

It made you slightly envious, wishing you would have gone with him. It just wasn’t ideal – going on tour with him. The two dogs you shared, Artemis and Apollo, needed to have at least one of you there. They couldn’t be traveling all the time. They filled the void Sam left in the bed, one cuddling into your ass, the other laying by your stomach. They’d flip flop on who laid where. You’d send Sam pictures back, Apollo wedged in your ass, head laying on your hip, Artemis sprawled out with her paws on your chest, just below your breasts.

He had never missed a human and two dogs more in his life. Leaving you was the hardest thing he ever had to do. He truly hated it. He hated leaving you, but he loved music and performing. He wouldn’t give that up for the world, and you would never ask him to. You loved watching him perform just as much as he loved doing it. Watching from the pit was an experience you wished you could feel forever, and in a way, you did.

Anytime Sam was home, he made every single moment feel like living a dream. The happiness – that bubbling feeling you’d get in your chest of complacent happiness – that feeling was something you got addicted to. Nobody you had ever dated made you feel the way Sam did. He’d dance with you in the kitchen to silly little love songs, their cheesiness spreading through the both of you, whispering sweet nothings into each other's ears.

That dreaminess feeling followed when the two of you would make love. He was always gentle, kind when he came home. He gave you everything you were willing to take. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, drinking in your scent that he’s missed so much, kissing the conjunction of your shoulder and neck. Your hands weave through his hair, not tugging, not pushing his head into you, but just keeping him there. You would lay like that for hours after, cum dripping from you onto the bedsheets.

You let Apollo and Artemis out before the rain came in, hoping they wouldn��t take too long. You hated having to keep them inside the house during the rainy weather. You didn’t exactly have time to wash a muddy dog. Sam, on the other hand, always let them out if they wanted to go out in a rainstorm.

He’d chase them up to the house, carrying them up into the bathroom one by one. You laughed when Sam walked out of the bathroom to get Apollo, noticing how soaking wet he was. He’d look over at you while carrying Apollo up the stairs, asking silently for your help. You’d help him even though everything in you just wanted to watch him struggle. You’d throw your hair into a bun, pulling up the sleeves of your shirt to your elbows.

Sam made bath time more fun. He would sometimes squirt you with their shampoo, making you gasp loudly as his goofy boyish smile covered half of his face. His laughter would fill the bathroom, but soon be cut off by you emptying a cup of water on his head. It would sometimes turn into an all-out war between the two of you, the dogs just watching it happen. Nothing beat the intimacy between you and Sam when the two of you showered, both fun and sweet.

When you and Sam would shower together, he’d always wrap his arms around you and just hold you there. He wouldn’t move, his arms wouldn’t budge. Your hands would be pressed against his chest, looking at him as he looked at you. Sometimes you’d get carried away, ending in an impromptu make-out session. You two had never tried shower sex in your shared home, mostly because the shower was nowhere near big enough. Not to mention, the last time you and Sam had shower sex, it ended with both of you on the floor of the shower.

When the dogs finally came in, they hopped up on the couch, letting you sit between them. You pulled your feet underneath you, sitting with your legs crisscrossed on the couch. A warm cup of tea in your hand, a blanket from the back of the couch thrown on your lap, both of your dog loves seated next to you, and a Netflix binge marathon of Criminal Minds.

When the rain started to fall, you looked outside, taking in the scene in front of you. You were happy that you and Sam settled on a house in the countryside, pine trees surrounding the entire line of your property, and extending as far back as your acres went. Hidden behind the line of trees was a small, cabin-like structure. Sam spent most of his time there when he wasn’t in the house. Inside was a small studio, an entire room dedicated to all of his stringed instruments and a spare bedroom in case he wanted to sleep in there.

Sometimes, he would spend the night there when the two of you would fight. He’d toss and turn underneath the covers all night, not getting an ounce of sleep. Neither would you, although the bed wasn’t empty. It was hard to sleep by yourself when you knew Sam was home. Most nights you’d cave and trudge through the backyard, wrapped in a soft blanket. You’d rap your knuckles on the bedroom door, waiting for him to open it. You’d wrap your blanket clad arms around him, engulfing him in the blanket as well.

Fights never lasted long. And anytime they did, it wasn’t more than a week. The one really bad one you had was a few months into living at your house. It was stupid – the reason why you were fighting. Chores would go undone, the boys would constantly be in the studio and making messes there. You and Sam had never yelled at each other before, but when you did, you let the two of you completely mellow the situation down before speaking to each other again.

You two vowed to never fight again.

Criminal Minds was almost as intriguing as the car pulling up to your house. Your driveway wasn’t too terribly long, but it was long enough for anyone in their right minds to want to drive down it. You peered out from the window, moving the grey curtain out of the way. The backseat door flew open, and out popped Sam.

You set your cup down on the windowsill, running to the front door. It swung open and hit the house with a loud ‘thwack’. You immediately threw your arms around Sam’s neck, not caring about the fact that it was raining. His arms wrapped around your middle so tightly, you were sure he was going to kill you. “You’re home.”

“Of course I’m home, I’ve missed you.” He breathed in the smell of your hair, noticing a change in shampoo and conditioner. “We should get inside though, honey, it’s raining.”

“I don’t care.” You didn’t want to move. You wanted to keep Sam right where he was. The car that held Sam drove off, leaving the two of you in the driveway. The rain soaked right through your clothes, through Sam’s as well. You removed your arms slightly, loosening the death grip you had on him.

With the rain falling, Sam surprising you coming home, life had felt like a movie. And like the scenes from your favorite cliché movies, kissing in the rain was a must. You slotted your lips against his, his hands tightly gripping your waist. You missed the way he tasted, the way his tongue felt against yours. Your hands moved to his cheeks, cupping them. “We can keep kissing, love, but we should go inside.”

You obliged, letting Sam bring his luggage in. The dogs jumped on him as soon as he was in the door, dropping down on one knee to give both of them scratches and kisses, although they were a little too excited for kisses. You brought his suitcase up to your room, putting it in one of the corners and unzipping it, hoping his clothes either weren’t wet at all, or only wet enough where they wouldn’t take long to dry.

You started hanging them on the backs of two of the chairs in your room, mostly just his sweaters. You stopped, though, when you heard the door shut. You turned around, looking over at Sam. You two met in the middle, lips clashing as soon as possible. His hands were all over you, attempting to peel your wet clothes off of you, just as you did to him.

His hands roamed across every inch of your skin as if he had never felt it before. His lips worshipped every spot they touched; from the tips of your toes to the top of your head. He took his time with you, patient with his tongue and fingers. He was adamant on making you come on his fingers and his mouth before making you come all over his dick.

The way you danced on his fingers would forever play in his mind anytime he needed to come without you there. With a hand wrapped around his dick, fucking his hand wishing it was your pussy instead. The devilish grin you had before sloppily kissing him was enough to make him come alone. You’d throw your head into your pillows, back arching up from the bed, stilling your movements for only a fraction of a second before moving them fervently against his hand. He just watches you, in awe.

He has you ride his face, wanting nothing more than for you to use him as means to make yourself come. You deserved it, after all. With a hand woven into his hair, the other gripping the headboard, you rocked your hips against his face. His tongue lapped at you greedily, humming against your core, low moans of your own bouncing off the walls of the room. His hands occupied your thighs, moving to grab your ass, feel the skin of your back, anything they could. Sam just wanted to feel you.

He gave you almost no time to recover from the two previous orgasms you had just had, wanting nothing more than to feel you wrapped around him. He has you underneath him, your arms wrapped around his neck loosely as your legs are hitched up over his hips. His arms wrap around you, slithering underneath your back. His pace is slow, partially from not wanting to spill into you too fast, but also because he missed this feeling.

He whispered into your ear, “You’re so pretty baby. I’ve missed you so much. Missed your smell, the way you taste, how your hands feel when you play with my hair. I missed you reading to me and cooking dishes for the both of us. I’ve missed coming home to you with your nose in a book and Criminal Minds in the background. Fuck, love, I’ve missed you so goddamn much.”

“Missed you, too, Sammy,” you breathe into his ear, his pace quickening, then faltering. His fingers played with your clit, bringing you closer and closer to where you needed to be. “Missed having you next to me in bed. Missed having you with me in the shower. Missed kissing you. Missed making you tea so much I started drinking it the way you like it. I’m so happy to have you home, Sammy.”

With one final groan, his hips stilled and he spilled in side of you. He kept going, however, to help you ride out your orgasm. Your hands begun to play with his hair the second he fully laid himself on you. You kept pressing kisses into his forehead, hoping with every single touch he could feel how much you missed him.

Two months had passed since then, Sam getting ready to head out on the road again. A small break to let the boys regroup before going back out there seemed like such a tease. With hesitant arms, you let him go. You never liked saying goodbye. You never did the airport goodbye, either. If you were going to cry (which you normally did), you were going to do it at home where nobody would see you.

Sam would be gone for three whole days when you take the first pregnancy test. Your heart is both simultaneously in your ass and in your throat at the same time. It’s face down, a hand over your mouth as you impatiently wait for the longest five minutes of your life to pass. You FaceTime Mackenzi in the meantime, wanting someone to be on the phone with you when you found out.

As soon as you flipped that little stick over, you put your head in your hands and cried. Little to your knowledge, Mackenzi was screen recording your FaceTime call, getting every moment of your reaction. Once you had stopped crying your tears of joy, you realized you had to tell Sam. He was coming home in a couple of weeks, so nothing was stopping you from telling him then.

Within the meantime, you went to the doctor’s, making sure you were actually pregnant. They did bloodwork to confirm and helped schedule the first ultrasound appointment with you. You scheduled it for the third day of Sam being home.

When he finally did come home, you had his favorite meal prepped. Wine filled his glass, but not yours. That was the first sign to Sam that something was happening. The two of you ate, talked about the small tour they went on, and even discussed the work you had done while waiting for him. You push your chair out as you stand and grab something from the kitchen. Hiding in your hands behind your back, you sit on Sam’s lap. “What do ya got there?”

“I’m pregnant, Sammy.” He looks up at you, eyes blank.

“Are you kidding me?”

“Nope.” You handed him the four positive pregnancy tests you had taken as well as the printed confirmation from the doctor’s office. He looked between everything you had presented him with. His eyes flickered back up to yours, tears brimming his eyes. “We’re gonna have a baby, Sammy.”

“We’re gonna have a baby... We’re gonna have a baby and I’m going to be a dad. I’m going to be a dad! Holy shit I’m going to be a dad.”

#sam kiszka #sam #kiszka #sam kiszka x reader #sam kiszka imagine #sam kiszka fanfic #sam kiszka fanfiction #godlygreta writes sam #via writes sam #greta van fanfic #greta van fic #greta van fleet imagine #greta van fleet smut #sam kiszka smut #dad sam

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balillee · 3 years ago

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why 'there's no lore going on' right now in the dream smp - The Misfits Analogy

Fans of television, especially British television, will probably be familiar with an early 2010's show called Misfits. The show ran for five seasons spanning 2009 to 2013 - while the first two seasons (the first moreso than the second) are regarded more as cult classics, the latter half of the show completely falls in writing and production quality due to one significant change - the cast.

Seasons one and two of Misfits was centred around the original misfits gang - Nathan Young (portrayed by Robert Sheehan), Kelly Bailey (portrayed by Lauren Socha), Simon Bellamy (portrayed by Iwan Rheon), Alisha Daniels (portrayed by Antonia Thomas) and Curtis Donovan (portrayed by Nathan Stewart-Jarrett).

The show was good for two different factors from my perspective -

The intersection of superpowered television and interpersonal conflicts that broke the norm for stereotypes.

How the cast reflected modern British society.

In summary, the show followed a group of five young offenders at a community service centre. Not too interesting - but give them relatability, realism and explore their character development and their existing stereotypes/tropes through the use of superpowers? Genius.

Nathan was most definitely the fan favourite character of the show - he was outgoing, annoying, larger than life in a lot of ways and in all senses, he was a skeevy asshole who would insult characters at every turn. He was very much the class clown of the show and any British viewer could probably see someone they remember from school in Nathan, except Nathan was lovable and you could sympathise with him because you could see him struggling primarily at home and with his family.

Spoilers for the show - Nathan's power was immortality and the ability to resurrect himself from death. This power wasn't explicit immediately either to Nathan or to the audience unlike all of the other young offenders, and it reflected his 'nothing can hurt me ' attitude. Nathan was a character who could take any comment and brush it off like it was nothing, and he in the physical sense could take being thrown off a roof, impaled and practically buried alive and be sitting in his own coffin with his iPod all fine and dandy.

Kelly was also another standout example - her character reflected the stereotype of a chavvy girl, 'council house and violent' - loudmouthed, not very smart, questionable fashion choices and a bit abrasive. The only difference is that the show knew they had to subvert that stereotype - instead, Kelly was smart in her own way and she was empathic -> her superpower was the ability to hear other people's thoughts, and later, she became superintelligent and when her character left the show she decided to move to Uganda use her newfound rocket-scientist level intelligence for good. She was still loudmouthed and definitely chavvy, but she was also a whole human person who cared about other people and who was definitely intelligent.

If I kept going, I'd be lamenting about how season one's cast well reflected and subverted stereotypes and expectations using their superpowers, but I'd be here all day and that's really not the point I'm trying to make.

By the end of season 2, Robert Sheehan, as the standout performance from the show, decides to move on to greener pastures (which,, I don't blame him, being stuck on E4 would have been a nightmare for his career and look where he is now? He's a fan favourite as Klaus in TUA now!) - thus, Nathan is written out of the show in a post- season 2 special in which he gets locked up in prison in America.

This was the first character to get written out of the show.

In season 3, we lose Kelly who moves to Uganda with Seth to defuse landmines, and Simon and Alisha are both killed, and the only remaining member of the original ASBO five is Curtis.

Season 4 rolls around, and we pretty much have an entirely new Misfits cast - Curtis, and then we have Rudy (who had been present since season 3), and then we have new additions Jess, Finn and Abbey.

Let me tell you that by this point in the show, all of the fans had lost interest.

Not only had the two biggest fan favourites, Nathan and Kelly, left the show, but you now have to replace four out of the five original cast members with new ones that don't function the same way the originals did. What type of person is someone with X-ray vision trying to represent? You could argue that maybe Jess is good at figuring people out, but I don't really remember this being explored that much in the show. And the difference between this reflecting a minor personality trait is that the original cast didn't do that - in dumbed down terms, Alisha was a 'sket' who had the power to make people horny for her, oftentimes against her wishes, through skin-to-skin contact. That's much more impactful and there's a lot more to explore there.

Episode 7 of Season 4 of Misfits is the clearest indicator of the departure of the original show's intentions and explains perfectly why it didn't work the way it used to.

For the entirety of the season, Jess had been crushing on a guy called Alex from a bar she frequented (who later went on to replace Curtis as the fifth Misfits member in season 5, go figures) who, as far as we had seen, not at all reciprocated those feelings nor was there any indication of him wanting to.

In episode 7, we figure out why.

Jess, using her x-ray vision, finds out that Alex's penis was stolen by a trans man.

I'll be honest, when I first heard it, I thought it was a joke.

The show went from having a diverse cast, not only in terms of having two black characters in it's main cast, but also in it's diversity of character tropes that they aimed to subvert - to then having a mainly white cast in a show that actively perpetuates harmful stereotypes about trans people being dangerous.

Now, and I want to preface this, I don't think that the Dream SMP is malicious in the same way that the writing of that episode of Misfits is. I don't think the SMP is malicious at all. What I want to highlight is how the change in cast directly mirrored when the audience dropoff was and when the show itself started to go south in terms of quality, production and what they wanted to achieve.

For the sake of my argument, there is currently three seasons of the dream smp. The start of the server up until the end of the initial disc war is the prologue, season one encompasses Wilbur's L'Manberg and the Pogtopia arc, ending on November 16th, season 2 starts November 17th and ends January 20th (the disc war finale) and season 3 spans from January 21st to the present day.

Most of the fans of the Dream SMP can tell you that the primary story of the server is centred around quite a few certain characters who viewers started watching to see more of. I'm guilty of this myself - I primarily watch the SMP for Tommy's story, and I also stick around for Wilbur, Tubbo, Ranboo and a little bit for Phil, Techno and Jack Manifold. Those were the people I was invested in and those are the stories I like to follow. Not to discredit or to downplay the work or the stories of other characters, but I can imagine that there are a few people who watch the SMP primarily for a close few perspectives/storylines, and following some storylines over others just because you're not interested in them is completely fine and there's nothing wrong with that at all.

In season one, there was always things going on with my favourite characters. Tommy was always getting himself into spots of trouble and making up different schemes to get people to come visit L'Manberg as a tourist attraction, or getting people to support the rebellion, and this was interspersed with the heavier, plot-driven moments such as Wilbur's mental breakdown, the festival, the pit fight and the season 1 finale. This got me invested in him as a character because he had been there for quite a while and we'd seen him develop and grow into the character we now see in season 3.

In the back half of season 1 came Techno, who really shook things up and threw a spanner in the works and provided a totally different perspective - unlike Dream he didn't hate L'Manberg because he couldn't control it, and unlike Wilbur he didn't have a personal connection to it and he didn't know it's history. Techno initially hated L'Manberg because it was a government he knew nothing about (and still knows nothing about even today), and because violence and destruction is kind of his thing.

We had a well balanced cast of characters - not too many - that we could follow and who all had varying perspectives, experiences and personalities. We had clearly defined groups of individuals with different morals: you had the people on the side of Manberg, the people in Pogtopia who wanted Manberg blown up, the people in Pogtopia who didn't want Manberg blown up, and on the side to compliment it all you also had the Badlands, comprised of three longstanding members of the server,,,, and then Antfrost who was kidnapped by Tommy that one time. It was all wrapped up nicely in a neat little bow and there was structure to it all. There was one plot that went in one direction, and despite the many perspectives, it all ended up in the same spot and the story ended. There was a conclusion.

In season 2, the two primary additions to the 'cast' were Phil and Ranboo, whose characters complimented the existing story well. Phil functioned mostly as a successor to Wilbur alongside Ghostbur by exploring well the departure of Wilbur as a character in that moment, and he also functioned well as a companion to Techno's character. Ranboo, on the other hand, had a pretty good complimentary solo story that could be followed alongside the main plot, however his story wasn't too distant from the main story to the point where he was completely removed from it - he had direct involvement in different events such as the exile conflict, his connection to Dream as the main antagonist of the season and his involvement in blowing up the community house.

Season 2 starts with a focus on two different spaces - it breaks up a longstanding duo and the storyline diverges into two halves: Logstedshire and New L'Manberg, and you have Techno's short 'retirement' arc working decently to compliment it and also to set the tone for his character going forward in that season. In Logstedshire we see the aftermath of Tommy being exiled from L'Manberg by Dream - we see him endure what is (in canon) at least a month of isolation and physical and psychological abuse and it culminates on December 15th when Tommy rescues himself, jumps from the tower and goes to hide in Techno's house (which acts as a good precursor to his involvement in Techno's storyline in that season). On the other side, we follow Tubbo in L'Manberg dealing with Presidency - he talks a lot and gets 'friendly' with Dream, he prepares to run against Ranboo in the coming election cycle (primarily because he doesn't want to be President) and we see his interactions with the power-hungrier Quackity who all too often takes the reigns and this culminates in the creation of the Butcher Army, and following the Butcher Army's attack on December 16th, once again, we have two clearly defined sides:

One one side, we have Tubbo, Quackity and Fundy who represent L'Manberg, and on the other we have Tommy (who is unaware of the Butcher Army's attack), Phil and Techno, and more in the middle we have Ghostbur and Ranboo.

Season 2's finale format is a clear departure for the format of November 16th, but it's not a poor choice - I think, especially considering the story that they were telling, it worked perfectly. On November 16th, pretty much everyone was streaming their perspective of the event; at the time, there were even compilations of everyone's reactions to Wilbur blowing up L'Manberg. On January 20th, however, we only had two perspectives - Tubbo and Tommy.

I'll say it now, while Season 2 was definitely Clingyduo's season, it didn't focus solely on them. There was also a big focus on Techno as a character, whose arc came to an end a little earlier on Doomsday, and there was also a focus on Ranboo a lot as a solo character, and he streamed a little later on January 20th with what I refer to as the 'epilogue', where there was also a shift in his character to expect moving forward.

Why season 2's finale worked is because it was centralised around only three characters, only two of which we ever see the perspectives of, and it was the finale of the longest running storyline of the entire narrative - the disc war. Two boys who were on their last life, making their last stand at the one man who pulled the strings to make their lives miserable - those two perspectives only, and it worked. We didn't have compilations of everyone reacting to the things happening around them which worked for season 1, instead, we focused on these two characters whose turn it was to get the focus, and we had iconic and moving moments. We had the two boys walking down the prime path saying what they could only assume might have been their last goodbyes to the people that still had a shred of care for them, we had the two sailing to where they would face off against Dream for their final stand and finally talking about their feelings a little and dreading the implication that if they were both to die, nobody would live to tell their stories, we had Tommy choosing his best friend over his discs time and time again, and we had Punz - Dream's last confidant - standing against Dream and bringing everyone with him and sending him to prison, now on his last life too.

Everything about it was perfect. The more focused ending worked for the ending of season 2 because it was their time to have their climax moment - and it wasn't some spectacular display of explosions or violence like in Wilbur's finale on November 16th, where the ramifications hit everyone and we got to see it, nor was it a show of violence and almost oppressive dominance like Techno's finale was on Doomsday, where we saw everyone's breakdown and how the people contributing to the destruction of L'Manberg, no matter how righteous they thought they were, did not care to understand how much they were hurting and destroying the lives of the country's citizens. On January 20th, Tommy and Tubbo went into it thinking they were going to die, they got their asses handed to them despite how hard they tried, and they had their behinds saved by Tommy's preparative thinking by people who weren't there to save them more than they were there to get rid of Dream.

Season 3 suffers a lot from a lack of focus, awful pacing and really poor timing.

Seasons 1 and 2 occurred during the brunt of the coronavirus pandemic, where everyone was stuck at home and had more time to stream because it was their primary form of content and because it was the best way to communicate with their friends. Thus, the pacing of those seasons was extremely steady and things were always happening.

Now, lockdown restrictions have eased quite a bit, and creators can branch out a lot more and can meet with each other in real life and can do vlog-style content. Therefore, they don't stream as much, and the focus of the Dream SMP story has shifted more towards newer or sideplot characters. If you enjoy those characters, that's fine, but when they take the focus away from the characters and the storylines the majority are expecting, a lot of people won't try to keep up with it and from their perspective there'll be a massive lull in narrative content.

What I'm saying, is that Tommy streaming for thirteen days in a row in July 2021 is a fucking pipe dream. It happened in December because the story was consistent and the pacing was steady and he had the time and the want to be there. Now, Tommy's off making his vlogs and hanging out with his friends and thus he can't stream as much as he used to. He's sort of suffering from the Robert Sheehan problem, isn't he? Tommy is still involved with the Dream SMP and his story is definitely continuing, and his narrative in season 3 is really starting to pick up with the newer developments, it's just that he doesn't have as much time to play the role anymore because he isn't streaming as much.

I'm not saying this is a bad thing - it's obviously making him happy that his content is changing and I'm fully supportive of that.

So when all of these meetups are happening and we don't have as much content from the main characters that we follow anymore, what happens?

Well, the fans get a little itchy. This fandom, especially. They might throw out a comment or a tweet asking when they're going to stream on the SMP, or if they really don't understand why the Dream SMP is good, they'll ask when the next 'lore stream' is, and they'll lament a little about how the content and the story has slowed, especially in contrast to the fast pacing of season 2 which only lasted a little over two months with much more story going on than in season 3 despite it having been going on for triple the time. What they'll get in response is that the Dream SMP is still going on and that lore is still happening.

On all accounts, these statements aren't incorrect. Lore still is happening.

But when you've been following lovable characters for two seasons, setting up their struggles and then switching the focus onto newer or 'sideplot' characters that you haven't really followed before, there's going to be a bit of moaning about it on twitter dot com.

The SMP now suffers from having too many characters, too many unfocused narratives, and poor pacing/ditched or unfinished storylines from the characters we used to follow and love while we're being told to love other characters instead.

I never really cared too much about the egg subplot, I'll be honest. I was a little interested in the involvement of Sam, Puffy and Ponk, but other than that, I wasn't really too invested. It very much tried to replicate the 'you should have paid me more' moment from January 20th at the Red Banquet, and it really didn't hit as hard because most of the characters there were either ones that didn't belong there at all (like Niki, Fundy, HBomb, and Purpled), weren't that involved with the plotline and felt out of place with the established characters in that storyline (Techno, Quackity and Ranboo), or were new characters that were difficult to get on board with because they hadn't really had too much of a story beforehand (Hannah and Foolish), or in the case of Antfrost, characters with no known motivation to be there other than that being the storyline they're currently in. Not to discredit those involved or their characters, but the Red Banquet really tried to replicate what the disc finale did with it's focused perspectives and it's Punz moment, and it failed.

Now, following the egg subplot's finale, I'm meant to focus on Las Nevadas, Snowchester and the Syndicate.

Las Nevadas is the most consistent storyline, however it's biggest problem is that it is filled with new characters or ones that are barely there. Despite how long he's been on the server, Purpled really is a new character if only because he's only really become a character recently - Foolish is still considered new, Slimecicle is new, Fundy rarely streams on the SMP. The only consistent longstanding and heavily involved characters that are a part of Las Nevadas are Quackity and Sam, and even their streams are infrequent, with a lot of Sam's perspective not even focusing on Las Nevadas but instead the prison.

Snowchester's plot is very much dying, dead and in the water. She's suffering. We haven't seen Michael in over a month, a nuke is still missing, Jack Manifold is dubiously a citizen and Tubbo doesn't even think he has a character on the SMP. It breaks my heart.

The Syndicate suffer from a lack of existence. The four characters really aren't a friend group in canon - all of the stuff about them hanging out all the time and them basically being a book club is all fanon. They've hung out as a four all of twice, the first time they ever got together they celebrated someone's death and then basically invaded Snowchester to give themselves a reason not to destroy it, terrifying Tubbo in the process. The second time was because it was Techno's birthday.

Now, Techno is in prison, and the only reason Phil hasn't read the will to progress the story is likely because of difficult scheduling with other server members, which is written off in canon as Phil not wanting to accept the possibility of Techno potentially dying.

Literally reading the will and having the Syndicate figure out that Techno's in prison with Dream will solve all of season 3's formatting issues and have the story back on track.

Currently, we don't really have two clearly defined sides the way we always had. We were meant to root for L'Manberg against the Dream Team, we were meant to root for Pogtopia against Manberg, and in season 2 we had a lot more moral ambiguity and room for side switching between the forces of Dream, Techno and Phil against L'Manberg, and then we rooted for Clingyduo against Dream.

I can predict that if the will is read, here's how a good conflict can arise.

Two clearly defined different sides - Las Nevadas on the side of Pandora's Vault, and the Syndicate (currently consisting of Phil, Ranboo and Niki), and you have compromises to make. If the side of the Prison wins, Techno and Dream stay in Pandora's Vault without a proper trial and being treated inhumanely, and there's also the threat of the rest of the Syndicate also being imprisoned. If the side of the Syndicate wins, the prison is taken out and Techno and Dream are no longer being treated inhumanely - problem is that Dream's out, and he's very much dangerous because despite what c!Dream apologists will tell you, he's not docile and he's not going to have a healing arc with Techno because he doesn't think he's done anything wrong and Techno can't tell him that he's done anything wrong (because Techno is the most wilfully ignorant character who gets to be political it's INSANE) - he'll go right back to the evil, abusive bastard he was, obsessed with Tommy, probably worse now that he can easily get Wilbur to do anything he wants and more vindictive against Quackity. Plus, if the Syndicate take down Las Nevadas they'll hold the most power on the server systematically and the so-called anarchists will ironically be the top dogs of the server.

Then towards the middle you'll probably end up having Wilbur, Benchtrio and Jack Manifold - Tubbo and Jack would prefer Techno and Dream staying in prison, except Tubbo's really not on the greatest terms with Q at the minute (because Q's paranoid and making conflict with parties that would have otherwise helped him out and thought they were friends), whereas Tommy would be stuck between wanting Techno out but needing to either keep Dream in or kill him, and Wilbur will be having to pick between aiding Dream's escape from prison or staying with Tommy, because he can't have both. Ranboo will probably be having the same problem as Tommy, except he's on the side of the Syndicate and will have to pick between the Syndicate or keeping Dream imprisoned.

Season 3 is salvageable, it really is. You can fix the poor pacing and you can fix the lack of focus with literally one revelation from fucking Philza M|necraft. But as it stands now, season 3 suffers from a similar situation as Misfits - almost replacing the cast of characters we've followed for the longest time with a new one in a format completely different to the original seasons.

#dream smp #dsmp #dream smp analysis #dsmp analysis #dsmp meta #dream smp meta #long post #esclapoanalysis

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bluwavez · 3 years ago

Photo

🌊 TIMELINE ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ –––– [ FINN LI ! ]

THE VERY MESSY LIFE AND RELATIONSHIP TIMELINE OF FINN LI.

TW :: DRUG ADDICTION, PHYSICAL ASSAULT, DEATH, TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS.

––– [ EARLY LIFE ! ]

FINN LI BORN MINGHUI LI WAS BORN IN 1999 IN TAMPA, FLORIDA TO TWO CHINESE PARENTS. He is the only boy of his family, being the third eldest and second youngest between three sisters, having two older sisters and one younger sister. Both of his parents worked stable office jobs. His father being an accountant while his mother worked in cyber security.

All the children in the Li household were very artistically inclined, his oldest sister getting a degree in art and becoming an art teacher while his other older sister, Aubrie, held a passion for dance. Finn says his love for music was introduced to him through his sister’s love for dance. He would play songs for her on his toy keyboard and she would make dances to them. There are dozens of home videos of the two putting on “shows” for their family.

Finn was closest to Aubrie growing up, their love for music and dance giving them a closer relationship than they had with their other siblings. Aubrie was the one to convince Finn to audition with her for ANGELICO Entertainment. She had more of a interest in KPOP and being an idol than her brother did, but didn’t want to audition alone.

The pair passed the auditions and became official ANGELICO trainees, being only thirteen and twelve at the time. Their parents were very hesitant to let them go at first due to their young age, but after convincing from the CEO of ANGELICO, they let them go to Korea and begin their training together.

Finn’s father proved to be the most supportive of the family, wanting nothing more than to see his children follow their dreams. He would often facetime or even visit South Korea to check in on his children, always letting them know how proud he was of them. Finn and his father had a very close relationship due to him being his only son. Finn’s father, Ang, often called Finn his “pride and joy” and never missed an opportunity to tell him how proud he was of him.

––– [ TRAINEE DAYS ! ]

When Finn began training, he formed a close relationship with Noah Park and Bae Kiwoo, the three of them becoming best friends. The three of them were called the “Golden Trio” due to the three of them being considered aces amongst the other trainees.

During his training, Finn’s passion for musical production began to flourish as he learned the ropes more and more. By the time he was sixteen, he had written and produced his first song.

He was a pretty popular trainee due to his humor and talent, many waiting for his official debut.

His sister made her debut first in 2015 at age seventeen in the girl group “iSTAY”. She hinted at her brother debuting soon so they could perform on stage together once again. Just a year later, Finn made his official debut in the revamped version of DEEPDIVE as their main rapper and lead dancer.

––– [ DEEPDIVE ! ]

Finn was added to the DeepDive line up in 2016 when he was seventeen years old, instantly becoming a fan favorite due to his sister and personality. A short time after he debuted in the group, him and Noah began producing for them to help cut down costs as DeepDive was costing ANGELICO more money than they were making.

The group struggled to get off their feet most of their career, often not charting high or selling albums well, but Finn’s father always remained their number one supporter. The members of DeepDive loved Finn’s dad and were always grateful for his unwavering support, many of them saying he felt like a second father to them.

Tragically, in 2018 Ang Li was killed in a car crash on his way home from work. This resorted in the Li siblings going on hiatuses from their groups and returning to America to be with their families. Their groups went with them to offer support and grieve the lost themselves. Alongside Finn, Noah, Enmei, and Jisung helped carry Ang’s coffin during the service.

Aubrie’s hiatus lasted 3 months while Finn’s lasted 5, he’s later stated he almost withdrew from the group to take care of his mother and little sister but instead opted to go back to Korea and send his mother the little money he was making at the time.

Things truly began to spiral after that for Finn. His group was making little to no money, everything they tried didn’t work, and he lost his biggest supporter. It was at this time, Finn began selling drugs with the help of Yeon Jaewon to help make ends meet.

While this was happening, Finn became addicted to multiple substances. He started off with pills, finding it hard to focus without them, but his addiction grew to harder and heavier drugs. He composed DeepDive’s most successful album “Siren’s Song” at the peak of his addiction. Many call the album a masterpiece while Finn thinks it killed a piece of him.

Due to Siren’s Song, DeepDive’s career finally took off, skyrocketing them to domestic and international success and they’ve been riding that success ever since.

Finn is often credited for his group’s success and is now a very sought after and respected producer in his field.

––– [ PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS ! ]

MYOI YUI :: He first began selling at the club ARCADIA where he met Myoi Yui, beginning a co-dependent and odd relationship with her. He often gave her drugs for free because he thought she was pretty, something he did for a lot of girls, and would spend the night at her house. They never did anything but sleep together and talk.

One night, he gave Yui the cocaine that led to her accidental overdose. When it was apparent she was overdosing, she was thrown into a car and quickly driven to a hospital, not wanting a death on ARCADIA’s name. Once at the hospital, they threw her out in front of it, honked the horn three times, and drove off when the doors opened.

Yui ended up making a full recovery but the pair didn’t see each other for almost six months.

Once Finn decided to get clean, him and Yui reconnected, rekindling their relationship. While Yui truly loves Finn, Finn oftens mistreats her and throws her to the side for other relationships because he knows she’ll always be there for him.

It’s unclear how their relationship will end.

NA HANEUL :: Due to the incident with Yui, Finn began selling at THE BLUE ROOM where he met Na Haneul. They began an unofficial relationship where Finn would give Haneul free drugs in exchange for affection.

This, on top of Finn doing this multiple women, resulted in Finn getting the shit beat out of him by Yeon Jaewon. Which resulted in Finn getting a broken nose and broken ribs, which ended in him going on a month long hiatus to heal. After this incident, Finn stopped going to The Blue Room and stopped seeing Haneul due to this.

Recently, they’ve reconnected despite their relationship never being anything but surface level and no where near healthy. The rekindling of their relationship started Finn’s relapse into drugs.

It’s unclear how their relationship will end.

[ HANEUL CAN BE FOUND HERE @haematicz ]

YEON JAEWON :: After Jaewon beat the shit out of Finn, the pair kept their distance from one another. The pair only reconnected during the time when Finn was struggling with his sobriety. They bumped into each other at Inkigayo, where they began a toxic sexual relationship.

Finn acted more as a punching bag for Jaewon than a partner. Finn relied on Jaewon to feel the high he was missing without properly relapsing. This resulted in them having conflicting and confusing feelings for one another. Finn just wanted Jaewon to like him, missing his companionship, but after letting several personal relationships crumble due to his relationship with Jaewon he realized the relationship wasn’t worth it an ended it.

The pair had one last night together, kissing each other for the first and last time before they completely separated from one another.

Their relationship is over and Finn plans to keep it that way.

[ JAEWON CAN BE FOUND HERE @r3surgence ]

#˗ ˋ 🌊 dive deeper ﹕ underwater !#kpop oc #fictional idol community

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ofcowardiceandkings · 3 years ago

Note

I think you mentioned listening to podcasts? Do you have any favorites to reccommend? I've run out of content :(

that i do !

im not entirely sure what kind of podcast you'd be interested in but i'll throw out a few of the goodies in my huge library of stuff , i'll miss out a few of the HUGE podcasts that have been all over tumblr though

a LOT of it is true crime or human interest stuff , or history because im nerd ,, and a few of these dont have nearly enough attention so [shrug] i'll try to keep this short i guess lol this isnt EVERYTHING ive got in my library or listened series' by any measure

i AM gonna pop a shout to both Stuff You Missed in History Class and Stuff You Should Know from iHeartRadio because their HUGE archives have kept me from losing my mind many times over , and they cover a wide range of both important and wacky topics

BomBARDed (ongoing) this is the only fiction podcast i have happening right now really but its DAMN GOOD ONE .... it's an actual-play D&D 5E podcast in the DMs own musically-inspired world, focussed on a group of multiclass bards going to music school !! and all players (+DM) are members of the Texas band Lindby !! and they actually use and play music in the show with one original song an episode !! Kyle's worldbuilding and storycraft are truly incredible, and (Nick) Goodrich, (also Nick) Spurrier, and Ali's characters are in depth and interesting as well as an absolute powerhouse :') i actually made a piece for its first fanzine, Bardic Dreaming, which published earlier this year and is free to view now, all the players and the community are super wholesome its just very good overall 💙

History & Humans;

Fall of Civilisations (ongoing) legit one of my favourite podcast finds, im so glad my youtube autoplayed one of these ... it took me like 2 hours to realise it was 1) not the same as what was playing before and 2) had been on for 2 hours and wasnt near finished lmao. anyway, this is a series by historical fiction writer Paul Cooper, and is honest to all thats good one of the best documentary series ive encountered in years - and ive consumed a LOT of documentaries. it covered the downfall of various civilisations through history, and the episodes run from an hour to FOUR hours depending on the topic. its so chill to listen to and just get done, but over the pandemic all of the episodes have been given full movie-quality video versions too on youtube if youre more of a visual person.

Casting Lots: A Survival Cannibalism Podcast (on series break) yeah that says that lol ... its a SUPER niche topic but its very interesting and treated very well despite being kind of comical at times, the hosts are just naturally funny lol ... it delves around from the history of cannibalism in whole regions to specific incidents as recently as the 1970s, and of course the first episode is about the Donner Party, and it covers things ive never heard of despite being kind of important ?? anyway Alix and Carmella are good eggs

Sawbones (ongoing) i probably dont need to mention much here other than say that Justin and Sydnee saved me from being SO BORED sooo often, the history of medicine is wacky as hell and its what most of my history GCSE was on so [shrugs]

Cautionary Tales (on series break) this was a wild-card find lol ... it's by Tim Harford "the undercover economist" who writes for the Financial Times, and its topics kind of weave modern topics and science with how to learn from historical errors ... its a bit weird but well worth a go, also each series has a few celebrity guest voice actors which is pretty awesome

Ephemeral (ongoing) this is a very strange but thought provoking series about sounds and other things just barely saved. topics include the last castrato, the hello girls, hand-stamped records, the spread of kīkā kila music, and acoustic fossils of wild places.

Neat! The Boozecast (ongoing) history and bartending whats not to like lol ... hosted by Teylor Smirl and now their dad Tommy, they're just digging around in how important booze is to human culture

True Crime (white collar and weirdness);

Swindled (ongoing) this is an amazing show full stop. A Concerned Citizen details some of the most impactful and unruly things to happen in white collar and corporate crime. very factually accurate but given the sheer bullshit of the topics the deadpan snarking is [chefs kiss] absolutely warranted ..

American Scandal (on series break) this one is a series within a series type, and spends a few episodes at a time poking holes in some of America's biggest scandals, from a dramatised but fact-based point of view. such as what the hell was going on with Enron, how big tobacco was forced to own up to covering its own ass, how Iran-Contra happened, etc. it also now has a sister show called British Scandal, which does the same thing for British cases but with a slightly different format.

Missing in Alaska (finished) this was a fascinating series, a deep dive into what happened to two US government officials who disappeared on a small chartered flight in Alaska in 1972. it goes some really strange places, but it actually turned up a lot of previously unknown information through the audience. John Walczak's new series in a new feed is Missing on 9/11 which looks into what happened to Dr Sneha Philip.

Pretend (ongoing) Host Javier Leiva holds interviews with anyone living a lie, or who have been touched by them. con artists, snake oil salesmen, former cult members, catfishing victims, anyone and everyone.

Power: The Maxwells (finished) hosted by journalist Tara Palmeri, the story of media tycoon Robert Maxwell from nothing to empire to mysterious death and the scandals uncovered after he was gone.

Lets Talk About Sects (ongoing) Sarah Steele covering cults from around the world, in particular those in Australia - where she is from. She often has former members on the show to share their stories, and share knowledge of how they left. each story has the relevant content warnings at the start of each episode.

Brainwashed (finished) investigation of the CIA's covert mind control experiments, centred on the experiments performed at a hospital in Montreal, and its cultural impact.

Dr Death (2 series finished) two series investigating huge cases of fraud and medical malpractice, and how they were brought to a stop. series 1 covers Dr Duntsch and his horribly butchered neurosurgery, series 2 covers Dr Fata and his fraudulent cancer clinic

The Immaculate Deception (finished) untangling the weird and disturbing fertility fraud of Dr Jan Karbaat, who fathered children himself through his fertility clinic, and the impact of his deception. later episodes also touch on other similar cases.

True Crime (Violent/General);

The Casual Criminalist (ongoing) Simon Whistler of-the-many-youtube-channels cold reads a script about the case of the day, with some of his daft commentary thrown in.

Southern Fried True Crime (ongoing) Crimes from the American South hosted by Erica Kelley, she puts all the facts out there but refreshingly for true crime she doesnt hesitate to tell you if she thinks someone is human garbage lol

They Walk Among Us (ongoing) probably one of the most popular UK crime podcasts, very measured and well put together, not weird or annoying about it either.

All Crime No Cattle (ongoing, feed slowed down for now) specifically about crimes from Texas, hosted by Erin and Shay, they're very sensitive hosts and a lot of the cases they cover shed light on why the Texas criminal system is how it is or show an impact at a national level

Canadian True Crime (ongoing) Canadian crime from an Aussie who's lived there for a decade, Kristi is again a sensitive and measured host covering some important topics

True Crime (Violent/Deep Dive);

Hitman (finished) journalist Jasmyn Morris digs around in the sticky tangle around a book published by fringe publisher Paladin Press, and its apparent use as a blueprint in the killing of a mother, her friend and her 8 year old boy for financial gain.

Camp Hell: Anneewakee (ongoing) this series is exploring how a wilderness camp "correctional facility" was endorsed by the Georgia care and juvenile reform system, despite widespread abuses and shady practices the whole time. warning for csa and child cruelty throughout.

True Crime Bullshit (on series break) this one is a huge huge rabbithole but a very interesting one where the host Josh Hallmark has spent years digging into the life and potential crimes of Israel Keyes. Keyes is often mentioned as a serial killer with no pattern, but in picking it apart thats not quite true, and has sparked some re-evaluations of missing persons cases and stumbling upon information the FBI has redacted organically. there's also a series in the middle looking into the crimes of Kelly Cochran

Forgotten: Women of Juárez (finished) this series looks into the huge numbers of missing women of Ciudad Juárez, the strange circumstances surrounding them, and the potential cover-ups and corruptions on both sides of the border, trying to give a voice to all of the forgotten women and girls and their families without answers. the series itself is finished, but a spanish language edition is being released every week now.

aaaaaand i'll call it there before i list everything lol, i hope you find something to plug your boredom hole with !!

#audio #rory's ramblings #podcasts #asks #anon #long post

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homeformyheart · 4 years ago

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hey~

hope you are having an amazing week!

how would you feel about doing a noah harris x mc request from the best vs worst prompts?

maybe 21. best day at school vs worst day at school OR 27. best game vs worst game?

hi anon! thank you for the request, #27 was fitting and allowed me to close-out the chapter of my noah x mc arc (a little bit got cut out from my outline, but at least now it's finished).

author’s note: when I got this prompt, I decided to take the outline I had written for a continuation of my other MTFL fics and retro-fit it here, which is why it’s a bit longer than typical prompt fills. this finally gave me the motivation to continue the relationship I started in “first choice” and “the perfect gift.” I also drew some real-life inspiration from patrick mahomes of the kansas city chiefs (national football league in the u.s.). enjoy!

copyright: all characters owned by pixelberry studios. series/pairing: my two first loves - noah harris x mc (emma price) rating/warnings: 13+; none based on/prompt: best vs. worst / 27. best game vs. worst game; also inspired by the song “never really over” by katy perry word count: 1.7k summary: two years after graduating college and agreeing to go their separate ways, the universe seems to want emma and noah back together.

best game vs. worst game

worst game

emma tapped her finger on her thigh nervously as she waited in her boss’s office for her first assignment. she had spent the last two years since graduating college curating a travel blog for a small magazine, which had allowed her to travel all over europe, north america, and south america – an experience she knew was probably once-in-a-lifetime.

but she was homesick and decided to return stateside once her contract was up. it didn’t take long to find a position with a professional agency that contracts photographers out for high-profile athletic and celebrity events. even as a junior photographer, she was going to have the chance to take her own photos.

her boss finally handed her a sheet of paper without so much as a glance, motioning toward the door. emma supposed she was excused then, quickly scanning the sheet as she walked out to her car. a pre-nfl charity meet-and-greet was the assignment, and if she wanted, she could stick around to take some back-up photos of the game.

seemed easy enough. except the team was the nightingales. where her ex-boyfriend was currently the quarterback.

a little over two years ago

noah gripped emma’s hand, leg thumping nervously in anticipation. his other hand held hazel’s, who wasn’t faring much better at keeping still. on the other hand, mrs. harris had sat frozen still in front of the t.v. for the last thirty minutes, and emma had to keep glancing over to make sure she was still breathing.

to say they were all on edge was an understatement. in a matter of minutes, they’d find out of noah was going to become a professional football player.

“and the twenty-third pick goes to… noah harris!”

the room filled with squeals as they all jumped up from the couch and gathered noah into a giant group hug. his arm never left emma’s waist, even as he lifted hazel off the ground in excitement.

“you’re coming with me, right?”

she avoided his gaze, choosing to hug him and duck her head underneath his chin instead.

“tonight is about you! we can talk about us tomorrow. we should be celebrating!”

emma took a deep breath and pulled her car out onto the main road, making sure her phone was navigating to the stadium. she hadn’t seen or spoken to noah since they broke up – even though he tried to understand her reasoning, which was that he needed to focus on football and she was going to be traveling constantly – and she wondered if he was still upset.

if they ran into each other, would he even acknowledge her?

her mind raced with different scenarios of how their “reunion” could go and before she knew it, she was pulling into the stadium parking lot reserved for press. you’re here to do a job, she reminded herself as she took a deep breath and made her way into the meet-and-greet area where players were speaking to and hanging out with several families and children.

she took a quick look around and sighed in relief when she didn’t see noah anywhere. she could do this.

about an hour later, she was packing up her equipment. the game would start soon and she needed to get into position. she hefted her bag onto her shoulder carefully before standing up, immediately wobbling under the weight and losing her balance.

a strong arm wrapped around her waist and steadied her.

“thank you—” her voice died in her throat as she looked up at the man that still haunted her dreams.

his eyes and face were mostly the same, but there was a hardened edge to them that wasn’t there a few years ago. his body and shoulders were much larger as well, and he pretty much overwhelmed her frame.

“hey cheerleader.”

she swallowed. “hi, noah.”

his hand lingered even as she righted herself and cleared her throat nervously.

“good luck—”

“it’s good to—”

they chuckled, tension broken for the moment as they looked into each other’s eyes.

“harris, let’s go!”

noah shoved his hands in his pockets and took a step back. “maybe we could catch up after the game, if you want to.”

her eyes brightened. “i’d love to.”

they didn’t get the chance. the world seemed to move in slow motion when emma saw noah go down in the pocket from a particularly bad tackle. he had to be carried off the field in a stretcher and it was all she could do to keep from running onto the field.

they had broken up so he could focus on his career. she hoped it wasn’t in vain.

best game

two years later

emma crouched low to the ground with her long-range camera, snapping pictures of the huddle. there was less than twenty seconds left in the game – just enough, if barely, time for one last play. they needed a touchdown. and she could feel the nervous energy in her body thrumming in time with that of the crowd.

when noah went down with that horrific injury a couple years ago, most people wrote him off and didn’t think he’d play again. and if he somehow managed to recover? they all just said he probably wouldn’t be the same. a collarbone injury was usually a career death sentence for quarterbacks.

but the media, press, and so-called sportscasters didn’t know noah like she did. how strong a fighter he was. how he picked himself back up after every setback and pushed onward.

this time, she was with him every step of the way.

that didn’t mean he had an easy go of it.

he had to get surgery and go through months of intense physical therapy to get his shoulder feeling back to normal. then he had rehab for football to try to get back into form. and there was always doubt as to whether he’d be as good as before.

the season hadn’t gone smoothly. they scraped and clawed their way to the playoffs, with opposing teams taking advantage of noah’s occasional hesitance in the pocket and conservative throwing by pressuring his position. but somehow, they pulled through.

sportscasters all over would remark about how something seemed to just “click” back into place for noah harris.

only noah and emma knew what that something was.

a few weeks earlier

“are you nervous?”

noah hummed thoughtfully as his hand trailed up and down emma’s shoulder.

“surprisingly, no,” he said after a moment. “win or lose, i have everything i’ve ever wanted right here in my arms.”

emma chuckled. “when did you become such a romantic?”

“you know you bring it out of me.”

he turned on his side so he could nuzzle his nose in her hair. “you’re it for me, babe.”

“me too, noah. i mean it. if you’ll have me forever, i want that with you.”

noah pulled back to look at her. “for real?”

she nodded.

of course, emma couldn’t say with confidence that their conversation made that big of a difference, but noah’s performance every game afterward seemed to be nothing short of miraculous. by all means, his shoulder should still be giving him trouble, but the way he was throwing today in the championship game would make anyone wonder if he had been injured at all.

but this was it. everything was riding on this last play.

they were down by three points and too far for a field goal. a touchdown would end the game and clinch the championship. the team wasn’t known for playing it safe, not with noah and his arm at the helm.

emma was glued to her camera lens and clicking away, but she was barely focused on the shots. she just hoped the footage was positioned correctly and usable. she heard noah call out the play and quickly scanned the field as players moved into position.

a hail mary.

it really was going to come down to these last few seconds.

she saw the wide receiver break through the line and speed down the field, turning back to where noah had stepped back, arm poised to throw. on instinct, emma moved her camera up and snapped the shutter, capturing the exact moment noah released the ball, right before he was tackled to the ground.

and then everything seemed to move in slow motion.

she swung the camera to the left, finding the receiver in the end zone with his arms outstretched. he jumped up and the ball came arcing directly into his arms and the stadium roared with such an intensity she thought she was going deaf.

emma quickly put away her camera and left her bag with her assistant before running on to the confetti-strewn field, weaving around reports, players, and staff.

she knew noah got tackled. she needed to see that he was okay.

despite the reporters surrounding him, she squeezed her way through and wrapped her arms around him.

“i’m so glad you’re okay,” she yelled over the stadium noise. “i knew you could do it.”

noah smiled and removed her hands from his neck. she frowned in confusion as he took a step back and dropped to one knee.

“what are you doing?”

he was holding out a ring box in his hand and she had no clue how that got there. did a trainer or someone sneak that over to him?

it didn’t matter. it didn’t matter that they were surrounded by tens of thousands of screaming fans or that this moment was likely being broadcasted live by the sheer number of cameras around them. it didn’t matter that his friends and teammates were all hollering and creating a protective circle around them.

all she could see was the love of her life looking up at her like she was the most precious thing in the world.

“the championship ring we just won today is nothing compared to what this ring means right here,” he said, opening the box to reveal a very sizable diamond.

“marry me, em?”

emma squealed, not caring that it made her look like an excited teenager.

“of course, i’ll marry you!”

noah carefully placed the ring on her finger before wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her up. he swung her around before placing her carefully back on the ground, bringing her in for a deep kiss.

“i love you,” he whispered against her lips.

“i love you too, noah,” she whispered back as they held hands and headed off the field.

* * * * * taglist: @choicesficwriterscreations; @khoicesbyk; @nyastarlight; @chetachisblog; @robintora; @shows-simp-card; @brycesgirl;

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vanaglorio · 3 years ago

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VANAGLORIA : A STUDY IN HUBRIS.

HECTOR SOLORZANO. full name, HECTOR ALEJANDRO VELASQUEZ SOLORZANO. 27 years old, born on december 28th, 2994 in mexico city. cis man and uses he / they / doesn’t really care about pronouns. sold his soul to his family’s global construction and real estate empire and works as a civil engineering project manager.

SKELETON. DYNAMICS. PINTEREST. HISTORY & MISC. BELOW.

trigger warning: suicide, drug overdose

IMPETUS.

the concept of making some kind of lasting, indelible mark on the world that wasn’t gilded, silver-spooned and handed to him on a platter. the glory of having his own name mean something, beyond inheritance and privilege and absurd extravagance. creating something with his mind and his own two hands — in and of itself, an impossible feat considering all he’s ever achieved has had his family’s insignia stamped on it. but an ambition he holds fast to like a cardinal point on a compass

plain old kendall roy style retribution and succession drama baby. hector’s never forgiven his father for destroying his brother and despite his father’s best attempts to shape him into the back-up heir, he’s going to fuck this company up before he ever gets to inherit it.

hubris is his ultimate achilles heel and downfall. yes, irony thy name is hector. thinks he’s somehow smarter, faster, hungrier and more brilliant and than everyone around him. which is obviously not the case. this guy is playing so many games within games with enemies and allies alike, he couldn’t claw his way out of the matrix-style shit storm if he tried.

HISTORY.

only child, the demon, angle and beloved favourite all in one. originally born as the younger son. the spare, not the heir.

hector’s father is the CEO of the largest civil and engineering construction company in the world. their headquarters is in mexico city but they have subsidiary offices in madrid, london, tokyo and los angeles. hector’s mother is the heiress of the velasquez real estate empire, her family holding company owning substantial parcels of land all across south america, north america and europe.

his older brother, teodoro, was born 7 years before him. the consummate perfect son and heir to the empire — until, of course, he wasn’t. escalating parental pressure, crushing academic expectations, the weight of the world upon his shoulders. teodoro was no atlas. hector was 14 when they found his brother overdosed in a penthouse in saint-tropez while on summer vacation.

the process of priming hector to become the next heir was so swift, so damning, as to be almost surgical. teo’s body was barely cold and laid to rest in the ground before their parents began to talk about hector’s ‘future’.

hector never forgave his parents for what happened to teo. they were to blame, of course they were — they stood by and watched as teo slowly killed himself, until there was nothing left but his body to go. he was dead long before he swallowed his own heart and jumped on a one-way first class flight to the french riviera.

generally speaking, hector’s academic record was rather unexceptional until teo died and he had no choice but to perform in teo’s stead. and he did it, teeth gritted and eyes slitted murderous, the whole damn show pony circus show. the endless parade of meaningless extracurriculars: everything from debate club to swim team and lacrosse to mathematics decathlons. enough to fill a trophy room with lustrous medals, accolades, first place ribbons, and still not enough. hector could never live up to teo’s looming shadow, nor did he want to. it felt, somehow, like a betrayal, to prove he was better than his brother in any way. to validate his parent’s desire to mould him as the emergency replacement.

the only subjects hector enjoyed with any genuine passion or fascination that wasn’t feigned were classics and history.

enrolled into verdamme as a staunch fuck you to his parents who had astronomical hopes he’d attend MIT or stanford or ETH and get an engineering degree. (he did end up getting one, postgrad.)

was julian’s so-called right-hand man throughout all the years at verdamme and is also one of the riot club member’s who knew julian the longest. loved julian as much as he hated him and thought he deserved to die. one of the leading proponents of the #kill caesar movement. somehow not the most suspicious potential suspect.

the irritating bastard in class who barely tried but seemed to ace every single test. in reality he just has an exceptional short-term memory and mind for rote learning — in one ear, out the other, etc. very much the kid that seems to be napping for all of class and then pipes up to give the most bizarre, unexpectedly insightful comment in the middle of discussion.

fucks with people, their lives / hearts / hopes and dreams, as a way to feel something? inside? maybe?? notorious for being one of julian’s worst enablers but was also plenty responsible for his own schemes, manipulations and cruelties.

MISCELLANEOUS.

is currently engaged to the heiress of a spanish shipping company in the world’s longest running engagement. almost never wears his ring but mexican and spanish news outlets made quite a big deal out of it when it was first announced over a year ago.

speaks spanish, english, french and italian fluently. due to being your typical classics nerd, also fluent in latin and ancient greek. conversational in german and portugese.

general vibe is aloof, albeit quite disarming once he strikes up a conversation, laidback, chariasmtic, “chill”, able to talk to anyone about anything when he can actually be bothered to. also the guy with zero chill, secretly. we don’t talk about that.

endeavours to avoid personal drama at all costs that hasn’t been purposefully orchestrated for some kind of game but will enjoy the schadenfreude from the sidelines while placing bets on who’ll come out on top. it’s probably a gambling problem.

some kind of deep emotional trauma (re: parental neglect & then overnight obsession with him being the perfect replacement son for the dead brother) (re: aforementioned dead brother who is possibly the only person he’s ever loved) that prevents him from properly connecting to people on a deeper level beyond shallow, casual and purposeless sex

travelling is the one and only perk of his current job. he loves travelling, but in the niche struggling backpacker way that normal twenty-something years olds do, not the private jet lifestyle of a billionaire heir of a global conglomerate

collects obscure roman artefacts, specifically from the late roman republic, and has an antique knife collection. his favourite is a ceremonial gold dagger and sheath from the tomb of tutankhamun.

teo’s girlfriend left his dog, socrates, with him after the funeral, claiming she couldn’t bear to have the memory of him around her. he’s unironically hector’s best friend.

#𝐈. 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐀𝐍 𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐇 / VANAGLORIA.

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marrys-dream-world · 3 years ago

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if we’re bound to be something, why not together? (chapter ten)

Read on AO3

First / Previous / Next

Notes: Content Warning: there's discussions of a canon-compliant suicide/self-harm attempt on s4ep11 Guiltrip. It's nothing graphic or even explicit that they talk about, but if this is a hard topic for you, it's better to avoid it. This will be under the cut for that reason too.

Day 10: Moonlight. @ladynoirjuly

Some miraculous powers left lasting consequences, but Chat Noir had felt none as acutely as he did Pigella's jubilation.

He knew that, on paper, her power was "Gift", the ability to show the person it was used on whatever they wanted the most. It was one of the most terrifying ones he had ever seen, along with the butterfly's akumatization and the cat's cataclysm. The power to show someone's deepest heart's desires, no way to hide them, made his skin crawl. It certainly left him feeling grateful he wasn't her enemy (and also reminded him to never get on Rose's bad side).

However, the pig miraculous either had its own aura or amplified Rose's natural one, because Pigella by herself exuded jubilation. Just staying by her side gave him more energy than drinking five cups of coffee or even seeing his lady's smile. He left the battle against Guiltrip and a reluctant Reflekta absolutely high on joy, playfully teasing Chloé and joining in on the class's reassurance to Rose. Adrien felt invincible, laughing along with Marinette and Nino as Alya tried to guess who Shadow Moth was after school (the reporter was particularly stuck on Bob Roth and, after seeing how he riled up Mr. Ramier during the shooting of the apple juice commercial, he wondered if maybe she had a point). Adrien felt like he was flying.

That only made the fall harder.

It happened too fast, first he was giddy as he went to his fencing class, then he felt like all his energy was powered down and he was left hollow before even getting out of the car. Adrien performed horribly in class, Kagami breaking through her post-break up self-imposed distance to ask him if he was fine or needed to go home. He answered that he was okay, before getting his ass kicked so hard by her in a match that the teacher made him sit out the rest of the day.

Chat Noir arrived at the patrol meeting spot already exhausted. He leaned against the railings of the bridge he and Ladybug agreed on, looking down on his reflection, illuminated by the moonlight.

At least I don’t look as awful as I feel. He thought, being seen by his lady as a complete wreck was the last thing he needed today.

"My lady!" He half-forced a smile when he saw her. She didn't look as affected as he had, just a bit tired. "Wanting to meet me by the river under the moonlight? How romantic."

"Chat Noir." Ladybug said seriously and his smile fell off his face. "What was that today?"

He frowned. "The Sentimonster? I thought we did fine."

"No, when he got you and you activated cataclysm and…" Her voice got quieter and quieter until it disappeared. Her lip trembled. "What was that?"

Chat Noir swallowed hard. He had hoped Ladybug wouldn't have noticed that.

"It was nothing, bugaboo, really." He tried to stay light-hearted, but her distress didn't seem to be waning. "It was just the Sentimonster."

"No one else did anything like that." She insisted firmly. "Please, Chat Noir, talk to me. Didn't we promise to be honest with each other?"

He sighed heavily, caught. It's not like Ladybug could or even would force him, but the exhaustion he was feeling was clouding his mind and a promise was a promise, wasn't it?

"When I was young, my parents used to go on trips all over the world. They said I was too young to go with and I hated being left behind, but by the time they came back with souvenirs and stories, I didn't really care anymore." Chat Noir said. Ladybug looked admittedly confused, so he chuckled. "I promise this will make sense by the end. Let me finish?"

She bit her lip and nodded, gesturing for him to go on. He took a breath, shakily.

"Once, they came back from South America and my mother brought back a bunch of stuff, mostly stories. She knew they were my favorite." His mind drifted back to sitting in his mother's lap and he could almost feel a ghost of her hand combing through his hair. "The one that stuck with me the most at that time was about this girl that wanted to become a star. Sometimes, the moon would choose beautiful girls from her people to become stars and it was that girl's biggest dream to be chosen. But when her time came, she wasn't and she fell into despair. She went mad with a fever and jumped in the river, chasing after the moon's reflection, and drowned. The moon took pity on her and turned her into a giant water lily, so she could become the one star in the water."

Chat Noir paused, taking in his partner's blue eyes shining with concern (for him).

"I really didn't get it at the time, how someone could want something, miss something, so much that they would just give up everything. That she would just jump in the river like that." He said so to his mother at the time, even. You'll understand when you're older, baby. She had said. "I think I get it now. Sometimes, I think if it was to be with my mom, I would…"

Embarrassingly enough, his words were cut off with a sob. Before he could even blink, Ladybug enveloped him into her arms, squeezing tight like he would jump into the moon's visage in the river and disappear.

"I-I don't really think about it a lot o-or anything." Chat Noir stuttered between sons, hot tears falling from his eyes. He couldn't bring himself to care that he was crying in front of partner, her arms felt too comforting for that. "But that Sentimonster was really powerful and I'm just so tired."

I can't even help my best bud face up to his old man…

It had been his fault that Nino was feeling that. Both as Adrien for being the source and Chat Noir for not protecting him from Guiltrip. In that moment, coupled with his father's apathy and Nathalie and mother too far for him to grasp, it was suddenly too much.

"S-sorry for putting this on you." He apologized, but shamefully didn't let go.

If possible, she tightened her arms around him even more. It left him with an ache in his bones that didn't bother him at all.

"I want you to tell me these things, Chat Noir. You're my partner and I love you, of course I want to know." Ladybug said, voice wet. "You can lean on me, you know."

"I know." He said, voice sounding hollow. It wasn't that he thought his lady was a lia,r it was just… hard to do that. Being well and truly seen.

"It's okay if you can't tell me, I know I can't be around all the time." She continued. "You can lean on your family and friends too, Chat, I promise that they'll understand."

Then you don't know them. He bit back this response. It wasn't fully true, anyways.

"I-I can't talk to my family about this." His father was half the problem, after all.

"Talk to your friends, then. You sound like you really care about them, Chaton, they can help you."

He wanted to make up excuses and vague promises to Ladybug. He wanted to explain that it was because his friends were great that he couldn't burden them. He just felt so tired, though. The idea of going back to pretend everything was fine, to going back to his cold room and lonely nights made his skin crawl.

"My friends…" He whispered.

Nino and his caring personality. Marinette and her drive to help others. Kagami and her concern for him even after he broke her heart. Alya and her unstoppable sense of justice. The class's obvious love and care for a distressed Juleka and a sick friend. Rose herself, always sweet and optimistic in face of trouble.

"I… I'll try, my lady." It wouldn't be easy, but he would. He had to.

She deflated and it was the first time he noticed how tense she had been.

"Thanks, Chaton." The skin of his neck felt wet.

They stayed there under the moonlight, patrol forgotten.

#ladynoirjuly #ladynoirjuly2021 #ladynoir #ladybug #chat noir #ml fic #my stuff #if we're bound to be something why not together #cw: implied suicide attempt

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aestheticseungmean · 4 years ago

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Can you do a idol au for ATEEZ jongho where him and hongjoong have the opportunity to work with a western artist (their main language is English but are learning Korean) and them and jongho hit it off and become friends, until one of them forms a crush 💞 (gender neutral reader please)

I Like You Very Much-Choi Jongho

As an upcoming yet very popular artist, when you suggested to collaborate with Ateez, KQ jumped at the opportunity. It just so happens that the maknae harbours feelings for you.

Gender neutral reader

Warnings: minor cussing

3.4K words

———————————————————

You were an up and coming artist, sparking interest all over the world with your music. Radio stations and TV shows clamoured to get you into their shows and those who were able to get you, shot up in rating. You talked about all your interests, plans for the future, and the inevitable dating scene. Interviewers often chuckled when you say you are single and not ready to mingle, agreeing with you even though they were all married. The one question that you get asked the most is: “Who would you like to collaborate with on an upcoming album?” The answer is always the same, Ateez. You appreciated the few interviewers who knew the group, but more often than not, you found yourself explaining who they were.

On the other hand, Ateez, despite debuting in 2018, were finding their way into other countries, capturing attention alongside you. They typically get all the same questions from the same interviewers with the same reactions. In one interview, the radio announcer had asked how Ateez felt about you wanting to collab. To which they cheered and wished the same. Apparently, most listened to your music daily, while stretching, working out, lounging around, or even just to create a dance to. An insane amount of pride went bursting through your chest as you listened to them praise you. Ateez, especially, Hongjoong and Jongho, talked excitedly about you, your music, your aesthetic, and overall how you were their favourite English artist.

———————-

Your one year debut anniversary was coming up and you were planning a safe world tour featuring your first songs, as well as the most popular ones. After talking with your company, your plan was to hit a bunch of places, including: America, Canada, Australia, the UK, France, China, Germany, Japan, Brazil, and South Korea to name a few. Many fans sent videos of them showing their support for you. In the same time, Ateez also had a Korean tour as well, performing in some of the same places as you. Just the thought alone exited you. With your trusty manager, Sadie, your language tutor, Mina, and your best friend/personal hype-man, Jake, you were set to go.

Mina sat upon your bed, watching as you frantically pack clothes to practice and sleep in. “You know we have clothes we have to give you? Being famous means you have an image to maintain.” “An expensive one,” you rolled your eyes, knowing that the outfits designed for you were no less than a thousand dollars. “Alright, let’s brush up on your Korean. Sadie said you had the most interviews there so let’s not make a fool of ourselves.” Mina started listing off random words, leaving you to translate them. Between deciphering Korean and remembering what to pack, your brain fried worse than Kaminari after he overused his quirk. Of course you weren’t walking around with a dumb expression but on the inside you were.

Sometimes, you wondered why you released your song on YouTube and why you signed on the dotted line, but so far you’ve managed. Sure there have been haters, but the amount of support outweighs the haters. Besides, when you feel like quitting, you remember all the amazing artists who have encouraged you to pursue your dreams, and your career. With the likes of Lizzo, Ariana Grande, Meghan Thee Stallion, Lewis Capaldi, Billie Eilish, BTS, and Cardi B all supporting your music, you had no reason to listen to the haters. You only need to focus on a good world tour anyways.

--------------------------------

The tour finally made its way into Seoul. With an unfathomable amount of want for the tickets, your company decided to hold four shows, plus the ungodly amount of interviews. This week was sure to be a tiring week, and you might sleep 24 hours straight when you get home, but it’s worth it to see the fans cheering you as you sang your songs.

The first night, you performed your songs and interacted with the fans in your broken korean. The second night was the same, save for a few idols who came to your show. You were surprised to see a few members of NCT and BTS up in the stands, dancing and wearing your merch. The third night was the night your company decided to surprise you with a last-minute duet of your song “Weeping Willow” with Jimin. You two sailed smoothly through it despite the lack of knowledge of whether your voices would harmonize or collide in a train-wreck.

And last, but not least, the fourth night is where you went all out for your final concert. There were colourful explosions of confetti, pyrotechnics, backup dancers, a live band, etc. You were confused as to why the dancers were there, let alone wearing masks during your performance, but the show must go on, right? Through the night, different dancers came up and spun you around on the stage, baffling you at your skill of dancing while singing. Finally, the final chord of your last song ended allowing you to attempt to talk to the fans in your limited language.

“Thank you guys for coming out to see the show!” The crowd erupted in cheers making you smile. “This country has been very kind to me and I can’t wait to come back. I’ll be here for a few more days so make sure to keep an eye out for me on the streets!” You smiled, hoping you could meet a few fans in your last few days, maybe get some pictures with them. “This has been an amazing concert, although, I do have to say, the dancers surprised me,” you admitted, rubbing the fabric covering your legs nervously. All of a sudden, the crowd went crazy, chanting “turn around” at you. So you did.

Immediately, you dropped to your knees, hiding your face. Standing in front of you in the dancers’ outfits, holding masks, were the one and only, Ateez. You had been performing with them for the past few hours without realizing. “Your manager called us, asking if we’d come surprise you for your birthday. We couldn’t resist. I hope you don’t mind.”You recognized the voice as Hongjoong’s. Of course Sadie would do this. She knew how much you loved Ateez, but she went all out this time. You looked up, your eyes watering from crying tears of embarrassment, joy, and anger. A few boys rushed to make sure you were okay as soon as they spotted the tears. On the screen at the back of the stage, you caught a glimpse of your hunched figure, crying. “This is so amazing,” you managed to stutter out.

-----------------------------------

After the show, you headed to the back with the boys to find the two managers talking with each other in hushed words. When they noticed you, they stopped their conversation and turned towards you. “So?” Sadie asked, waiting for your reaction. “I hate you…But I absolutely love you, Sadie.” “I thought so. Now, all of you, go get changed, we are going out to eat, company’s treat,” She said, holding up a card which you recognized as the company credit card. In an instant, you were rushing to your dressing room to change, stomach growling loudly.

The van waiting outside for you, was giant. Maybe a twelve seater. All eleven of you piled in, the managers sitting in the front seats while you and the boys filed into the other seats. “Would you mind doing a V-Live with us?” Seonghwa asked, pulling out a phone. “No, but I don’t know what to do.” “Just be you,” he replied, laughing. Throughout the whole ride, you were sandwiched in between San and Wooyoung who wouldn’t stop making you laugh while Seonghwa flirted to the camera. The others talked or closed their eyes for a little rest before you got to the restaurant. Not once did you feel out of place as well.

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It’s been a few months since you met Ateez on your world tour. You kept in touch through texting since San slipped his number into your phone without you noticing. Not that you were complaining anyways. When you mentioned you were working on a new album but struggling, some of the boys offered to call you, to talk of course, not figure out what the next song will be so they can get a headstart on learning it. Eventually, you took them up on that offer and Hongjoong called. You two talked for what seemed like an eternity, talking about concepts and themes.

The call seemed to help you majorly. You ended up finishing two songs and wrote the meanings behind them, a habit you had because you sucked at explaining things. Hongjoong, on the other hand, got some beats done for a few of Ateez’s future songs. You were still on the phone with him when you realized that you were writing the songs to the few beats you heard. “SHIT!” “When did you learn to cuss in Korean?” Your wooden pencil was slammed down on the desk, breaking. “That’s not the problem. The problem is, I’ve been writing my songs to your beats. I mean I know they can be for another beat but the producers are going to ask me how I want to sing it. I’ll just end up singing it to your beats,” You whined.

Hongjoong laughed. “Let’s hear it then.” “Hear what?” You heard shuffling on the phone before a few mouse clicks. “Let’s hear you sing along to the beats,” he said, hitting play on the computer, starting the music. You sighed and sang along with your lyrics, surprised at how well the music coincided. “You know what? I think I’ll send these beats to you. They sound better with your lyrics anyway,” Hongjoong complimented, hitting send. “You don’t have to,” You protested only to be met with the notification that Hongjoong had sent it to you anyways. “Too late. Can you imagine if we collabed on a song, or an album?”

“That would be amazing, but I know I wouldn’t be able to keep up with your dance skills. Even your least skilled dancer is freaking amazing. Oh wait...You don’t have one because who the hell is the least skilled dancer in Ateez?” you complained, yet complimented at the same time. “Please, you could keep up. You are a ball of energy.” “A ball of energy with two left feet, Joong.” You shut your notebook and put it away, cleaning up your desk. “I don’t believe you.” “You don’t have to, just know it’s true. Anyways, it’s 3am here. I need to go to bed.” He shifted in his seat and frowned. “Okay. I’ll talk to you later. Sweet dreams!” “Night, Joong,” you said before hanging up the phone and throwing yourself on your bed, falling into a deep sleep.

----------------------------

The producers absolutely loved your songs with Hongjoong’s beats. So much so that the company immediately wanted a collaboration. For the next few weeks, before the release of your newest album, the executives buckled down on getting that ‘magic’ song that would take the world by storm. It wasn’t long before the people at KQ agreed, knowing that the collaboration between Ateez and you would bring media and attention to the latter. And soon, you found yourself on a plane, in business class (because first class was too empty and economy was too crowded) to Seoul.

A few people were eager to see you, but most went to sleep as it was five in the morning. Thankfully, you were granted a window seat so you could look out at the view. Most of the time though, you found yourself entranced in the movies they offered on flight, catching up on the new Tom and Jerry movie. And before you knew it, you found yourself landing in Seoul. Your manager, who enjoyed first class, got off the plane and waited for you. Many fans waited with Ateez signs as you walked by, confused.

On the other side of the crowd, Ateez waited patiently to surprise you with their presence. They begged and begged the company to go get you instead of sending one of their scary bodyguards to. Finally, they gave in, allowing the boys to go get you. Word got out though and that meant they had to keep undercover. Or at least try to, which was not Wooyoung’s strong suit. At one point, Hongjoong threatened Wooyoung to get him to shut up. It worked up until Wooyoung saw you, making your way out of the crowd. He and the others ran up to you, suffocating you in a hug. “Let’s get to the van before the crowd doesn’t let us leave,” Hongjoong commanded.

They rushed you to the van, ushering you in before clamouring in themselves. This time around, you were in between Yunho and Jongho. You greeted them politely, your korean better this time around due to talking with the boys constantly. “So, you’ll be staying at a hotel not far from us. We’ll be sure to always have someone to come get you,” Seonghwa said, relaying the information he had been given. “The whole someone coming to get me is extra.” “Nonsense,” Wooyoung exclaimed. “It’s rude to have a guest and not guarantee their safety. Besides some of our families would have our heads if they found out we weren’t doing the utmost for you,” he added playfully.

----------------------------------

The next day, you dressed in comfortable clothing, not caring about your fashion. The agenda for the day was to write a song with Hongjoong and Jongho. When you first found out you were only collabing with those two, you felt a little sad, but when Sadie told you it was a trial collab, to see how well it would do, it didn’t make it any better, in fact, you felt worse. You protested and argued for the whole group, but all the bosses said was, “If this goes well, you can have an entire album with them.” Sure, the excitement for an entire album with Ateez would be amazing, but what if it didn’t go well?

You thought about that the entire time it took you to get to the KQ building. Only then, it was Jongho who brought you out of your head. “Hey, ________! The studio is this way. It’s my first time watching Hongjoong hyung make the beats,” He said, smiling brightly. You couldn’t help but smile back. “Mkay, Jongho. Lead the way,” You mumbled, following the maknae to a secluded room. Inside, Hongjoong was already set up at the computer, messing with some beats.

You took in the room around you. The lights were dimmed, probably to help hongjoong focus. A sleek desk with a soundboard was pushed up against a wall with glass, allowing you to look into the other room. A few of the spinny chairs were worn down, a sign of heavy usage. In the other room, you could see a typical setup for a sound booth. A microphone stood in the middle, headphones hanging off of it. The sound-proof padding looked fairly new with a few different instruments lining the walls. It reminded you of home. Of the studio you usually work in.

Hongjoong greeted you as soon as he caught a glimpse of movement. “Hey guys! I was checking some different beats and tunes for the song.” “You’re good. Shall we get started?” You asked, pulling out your beat up notebook. “That thing has seen better days,” Jongho joked, looking at the binding peeling off. You giggled and nodded. “I’ve had it for many years. I need a new one, but I haven’t gotten around to it. Besides, this has all my songs. Even the unsung ones.” “So that’s your most prized possession then?”

“I guess you could say that,” you hummed. “But it’s not like I’m playing keep away with it. I don’t care if you guys read it because I trust you. It’s randomly leaving it in public and never seeing it again that I’m worried about.” “Understandable. My flash drive is always with me,” Hongjoong said, pointing to the drive that was sticking out from the computer. “ You smiled softly at Hongjoong and grabbed your pencil. “Let’s get started, shall we?”

------------------------

The next few days were tedious with the finishing of the song, the practicing of pronunciation for both parties, and making the beat. You found yourself growing closer to the two boys, even helping write a few of their future songs. In response, they taught you how to make beats and successfully break an apple, although that only happened once and you still haven’t been able to do it again. There was a different aura around them when you hung out. Hongjoong felt more calm and brotherly even, whilst Jongho had a more timid feeling. Like he was hiding something. You pushed it off, thinking it was him being a bit skeptical of you still.

When you finally thought all the hard work was done, Hongjoong dropped a choreography on you. The thing you dreaded the most. Thankfully, the duo were willing to take things step by step slowly with you, guiding you through the most miniscule things. A couple of the days, Hongjoong couldn’t make it, leaving you to practice with Jongho, who became more stand-offish.

Until you had enough of the ridiculous behaviour because it had come out of nowhere. “Are you okay, Jongho? Is there something I’m doing wrong?” You asked, taking a drink. “No, you’re dancing fine.” “I meant generally? You seemed fine in the beginning and now you look like you think I’m poisonous. Do you not like me?” Jongho looked taken aback, mouth opening and closing like a fish gaping for water as he tried to figure out the words he wanted to say. “It’s not that,” He managed. “Then what is it? I don’t want to feel like I have to walk on glass around you.” “Let’s just get this choreo learned okay?” You huffed and got back to practicing, angry that he ignored your question.

------------------------------------

“Okay, one more time,” the producer demanded, signalling you to start your verse over again. You did as he asked and cheered when he praised you. “Jongho, you’re up.” “You got this, Jongho,” you tried to encourage him. He gave you a nervous half-hearted smile and headed to do his part. He sang beautifully, even more than when you three were practicing by yourselves. You couldn’t help the cold chills that ran up your arms giving you goosebumps. “Woah,” you breathed out, in wonder.

You went to praise Jongho again, exclaiming how he was so amazing. An embarrassed smile graced his features making your heart swell. “So cute!” “Quiet, everyone,” the producer said, preparing for Hongjoong’s rap. You turned your attention towards the leader, preparing yourself for his rapping. Jongho took this chance to excuse himself from the room. As usual, Hongjoong owned his rap and you almost felt bad for Jongho missing it, but then you remembered that he could easily hear it again later.

It was a quick session after Hongjoong finished. Just a few harmonies here and there and you were done for the day. All of the boys wanted to go out for food to celebrate. Yeosang offered to go to the chicken place on the other side of town and Mingi agreed. Once again, you found yourself sitting by Jongho, except this time, you were sitting in the pair of seats in the second row, allowing it to be just you two. He pulled out a package and handed it to you, blushing. “I got you this.” You smiled and took the carefully wrapped package.

“Can I open this now or do I have to wait?” “Um, you can now,” Jongho said, his ears turning red. You opened the wrapping carefully to find a new journal. “Oh my god, Jongho!” You opened the cover to look at the pages to find a cute little note waiting. Jongho had written the words ‘I like you very much’ in english, with cute little doodles surrounding it. “Wait? Like-” “Like a crush,” he stuttered. “Well, I like you too Jongho,” you admitted, gaining a few wolf whistles from the surrounding boys that were watching the exchange.

#choi jongho #ateez #kpop #ateez fluff #atz jongho #ateez jongho #jongho fluff #Koop fluff #atz fluff #jongho x reader #ateez x reader

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oberlincollegelibraries · 4 years ago

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Weekend Edition: Latinx Memoirs

This weekend we’re taking a look at memoirs by Latinx authors. There are many titles to choose from right here at OCL, but don’t forget that you can also check out books through OhioLINK and SearchOhio for even more options.

Butterfly Boy: Memories of a Chicano Mariposa by Rigoberto González Heartbreaking, poetic, and intensely personal, this is a unique coming-out and coming-of-age story of a first-generation Chicano who trades one life for another, only to discover that history and memory are not exchangeable or forgettable. Growing up among poor migrant Mexican farmworkers, Gonzaĺez also faces the pressure of coming-of-age as a gay man in a culture that prizes machismo. Losing his mother when he is twelve, Gonzaĺez must then confront his father's abandonment and an abiding sense of cultural estrangement. His only sense of connection gets forged in a violent relationship with an older man. By finding his calling as a writer, and by revisiting the relationship with his father during a trip to Mexico, Gonzaĺez finally claims his identity at the intersection of race, class, and sexuality. The result is a leap of faith that every reader who ever felt like an outsider will immediately recognize.--From publisher description

The Motorcycle Diaries by Ernesto Che Guevara The diaries written by Che Guevara during his riotous motorcycle odyssey around South America at the age of twenty-three.

American Chica: Two Worlds, One Childhood by Maria Arana From her father's genteel Peruvian family, Marie Arana was taught to be a proper lady, yet from her mother's American family she learned to shoot a gun, break a horse, and snap a chicken's neck for dinner. Arana shuttled easily between these deeply separate cultures for years. But only when she immigrated with her family to the United States did she come to understand that she was a hybrid American, an individual whose cultural identity was split in half. Coming to terms with this split is at the heart of this graceful, beautifully realized portrait of a child who "was a north-south collision, a New World fusion. An Americanchica." Through Arana's eyes the reader will discover not only the diverse, earthquake-prone terrain of Peru, charged with ghosts of history and mythology, but also the vast prairie lands of Wyoming, "grave-slab flat," and hemmed by mountains. In these landscapes resides a fierce and colorful cast of family members who bring herhistoriavividly to life, among them Arana's proud paternal grandfather, Victor Manuel Arana Sobrevilla, who one day simply stopped coming down the stairs; her dazzling maternal grandmother, Rosa Cisneros y Cisneros, "clicking through the house as if she were making her way onstage"; Grandpa Doc, her maternal grandfather, who, by example, taught her about the constancy of love. But most important are Arana's parents, Jorge and Marie. He a brilliant engineer, she a talented musician. For more than half a century these two passionate, strong-willed people struggled to overcome the bicultural tensions in their marriage and, finally, to prevail.

My Beloved World by Sonia Sotomayor The first Hispanic and third woman appointed to the United States Supreme Court, Sonia Sotomayor has become an instant American icon. Now, with a candor and intimacy never undertaken by a sitting Justice, she recounts her life from a Bronx housing project to the federal bench, a journey that offers an inspiring testament to her own extraordinary determination and the power of believing in oneself. Here is the story of a precarious childhood, with an alcoholic father (who would die when she was nine) and a devoted but overburdened mother, and of the refuge a little girl took from the turmoil at home with her passionately spirited paternal grandmother. But it was when she was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes that the precocious Sonia recognized she must ultimately depend on herself. She would learn to give herself the insulin shots she needed to survive and soon imagined a path to a different life. With only television characters for her professional role models, and little understanding of what was involved, she determined to become a lawyer, a dream that would sustain her on an unlikely course, from valedictorian of her high school class to the highest honors at Princeton, Yale Law School, the New York County District Attorney's office, private practice, and appointment to the Federal District Court before the age of forty. Along the way we see how she was shaped by her invaluable mentors, a failed marriage, and the modern version of extended family she has created from cherished friends and their children. Through her still-astonished eyes, America's infinite possibilities are envisioned anew in this warm and honest book, destined to become a classic of self-invention and self-discovery.

La Distancia Entre Nosotros by Reyna Grande "Cuando el padre de Reyna Grande deja a su esposa y sus tres hijos atrás en un pueblo de México para hacer el peligroso viaje a través de la frontera a los Estados Unidos, promete que pronto regresará; con el dinero suficiente para construir la casa de sus sueños. Sus promesas se vuelven más difíciles de creer cuando los meses de espera se convierten en años. Cuando se lleva a su esposa para reunirse con él, Reyna y sus hermanos son depositados en el hogar ya sobrecargado de su abuela paterna, Evila, una mujer endurecida por la vida. Los tres hermanos se ven obligados a cuidar de sí mismos. En los juegos infantiles encuentran una manera de olvidar el dolor del abandono y a resolver problemas de adultos. Cuando su madre regresa, la reunión sienta las bases para un capítulo nuevo y dramático en la vida de Reyna: su propio viaje a El otro lado para vivir con el hombre que ha poseído su imaginación durante años-- su padre ausente."--Book cover

In the Country We Love: My Family Divided by Diane Guerrero ; with Michelle Burford “ Diane Guerrero, the television actress from the megahit Orange is the New Black and Jane the Virgin, was just fourteen years old on the day her parents and brother were arrested and deported to Colombia while she was at school. Born in the U.S., Guerrero was able to remain in the country and continue her education, depending on the kindness of family friends who took her in and helped her build a life and a successful acting career for herself, without the support system of her family. In the Country We Love is a moving, heartbreaking story of one woman's extraordinary resilience in the face of the nightmarish struggles of undocumented residents in this country. There are over 11 million undocumented immigrants living in the US, many of whom have citizen children, whose lives here are just as precarious, and whose stories haven't been told. Written with Michelle Burford, this memoir is a tale of personal triumph that also casts a much-needed light on the fears that haunt the daily existence of families likes the author's and on a system that fails them over and over"-- Provided by publisher

When I Was Puerto Rican by Esmeralda Santiago [The author's] story begins in rural Puerto Rico, where her warring parents and seven siblings led a life of uproar, but one full of love and tenderness as well. Growing up, Esmeralda learned the proper way to eat a guava, the sound of the tree frogs in the mango groves at night, the taste of the delectable sausage called morcilla, and the formula for ushering a dead baby's soul to heaven. But just when Esmeralda seemed to have learned everything, she was taken to New York City, where the rules - and the language - were bewilderingly different. How Esmeralda overcame adversity, won acceptance to New York City's High School of Performing Arts, and then went on to Harvard, where she graduated with highest honors, is a record of a tremendous journey by a truly remarkable woman.-BooksInPrint.

#oberlin college libraries #oberlin college #OCLReads #OCL Reading Challenge #Reading Challenge #Book Bingo #Latinx Memoir #Latinx Biography

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medea10 · 4 years ago

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My Review of Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni GOU

(a.k.a. When They Cry Gou)

I know what you’re thinking. Why the heck am I reviewing this anime again? I’ve already written a review in 2009 and re-polished it in 2016. (Here it is BTW) I’ve made my point on who I like, hate, what ships are worthy, and poked fun at all the deaths that happened throughout the series. I think some time has passed that I should say some thoughts on this…um, story. After all, Higurashi is one of my favorite animes.

STORY: Ah shit, here we go again!

Higurashi or When They Cry is about a boy named Keiichi Maebara who recently moved to a place called Hinamizawa. And ever since moving to this town, he’s found his days are filled with fun mischief with fellow friends Rena Ryuuguu, Satoko Hojo, Mion Sonozaki, and Rika Furude. But little does Keiichi know that there’s a little murder mystery that surrounds the town. During a town festival known as Watanagashi (or Cotton Drifting), there’s usually one or two people that go missing or turn up dead. And this year, Keiichi is next. So let’s relive the horrors that plague the town of Hinamizawa and…

One episode later.

Wait, what the…?! It’s episode 2, why are we seeing Hanyuu? I don’t remember that in the manga. The visual! THE VISUAL! WHAT THE FUCK?! ISN’T THIS SUPPOSED TO BE A REBOOT? WHAT THE FUCK?! WHAT THE FUCK?! WHY IS THERE AN ADULT RIKA?! WAIT, IS THAT ADULT RIKA OR BERN? IS THIS GOING TO BE THE PARALLEL UNIVERSE TO THE WITCHES OF UMINEKO?! THE SHADOWS IN THE OPENING ARE TOO FAMILIAR FROM OTHER WORKS! Ryukishi07, you magnificent, fucking troll master for keeping this hidden until the second episode’s air date!

Many of us did not see this coming. When they announced a new Higurashi series that was going to be done by a different studio, many of us speculated whether this was going to be a reboot or a sequel. But then we got the PV trailers and it looked like we were going to get a reboot to correct the mistakes Studio Deen made years ago. Rika’s head doesn’t look like its gonna snap off because her body is so small in comparison. Improvements! I mean, they showed everything we were already used to like the yandere girls, the original soundtrack, the original freakin’ cast, and death by baseball bat. Hell, the first episode ended with an Eiko Shimamiya song! It was on track to being a reboot! A better looking reboot!

Here in lies the sequel aspect! After episode one, we get a scene that isn’t usually seen until the Kai part of Higurashi (a good 4-5 arcs away). And they give away the secret that Rika Furude is repeating the timeline of June 1983 over and over because she keeps dying. And as the series progresses, you notice little things different from the original series. Many of the well-known storylines end much differently than what you remember. Instead of Keiichi killing Rena and Mion with a baseball bat, you’ve got Rena going psycho on Keiichi. And Rika’s fate is somehow worse than the stories of the original series. So let’s head back to Hinamizawa to hear the cicadas cry and watch a murder mystery unfold.

THE SUB: All the original voice actors have returned to voice their respected roles. Perfection in a nutshell!

LICENSING: You’ve gotta be shitting me!

As I’ve mentioned years ago in my review, the original Higurashi anime went through a turbulent time being licensed in the states. It was originally licensed and dubbed by Geneon. But once Geneon collapsed, FUNimation licensed it and did absolutely fuck all with it. Geneon could only manage to squeak out one season. At this point, FUNimation was picking up titles that Geneon used to have before it fell under including Familiar of Zero, Kyou Kara Maou, and yes, Higurashi. All of these titles mentioned here were done absolutely nothing with despite having cult followings, second seasons, and OVA’s.

A year or two after licensing it, the license expired for Higurashi. For nearly six years, the only copies you could get were out of print and estimating at $500 at the very least for a full collection. Single DVD’s could be found in rare shops, but it would take like 13 years to complete the fucking collection if you did it that way. And that was only for the first season. Second season, the best all of us could do was bootleg DVD’s from Japan Town or fansubs with glaring errors for the best season to Higurashi. We had to deal with this shit until Sentai Filmworks licensed and released the first 2 seasons and the Rei OVA’s.

AND NOW YOU’RE TELLING ME FUNIMATION IS CLAIMING HIGURASHI ALL FOR THEMSELVES?!

Where the shit was this love 10 years ago when we were asking politely to release Kai? People ignorantly blew Higurashi off for years because season two was never released in the states until 2016 because they thought the damn anime ended after Rena held up the school. I’m already irritated with FUNimation after the Interspecies Reviewers debacle and I’m still quite butt-hurt over them re-releasing Nichijou with a dub to make a quick buck. Licensing Higurashi just brings back old anger. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy Higurashi is legally licensed and can be seen on at the very least Hulu. It’s just that I hold grudges and this was a big one.

THE DUB: Holy…um, okay! This is a rather big gulp to take in. As I’ve repeatedly mentioned in past reviews, the Higurashi dub was a mixed bag of okay, bad, and oh gasperts kill it with fire. So, not great! The good folks at Geneon (before bankrupting in America) dubbed the first season with a good chunk of folks that put their fake names to the credits. Again, not great! To me, there were some aspects of Megan Hollingshed, Mela Lee, and Grant George’s performances of Mion, Rena, and Keiichi that were okay. SOME! John Snyder and Karen Strassmen as Ooishi and Takano were the best out of that dub. Everything else was just irredeemable! It needed a redub, an overhaul, and a spit-shine. For years, I’ve wondered who would be the dream cast. Sentai Filmworks unfortunately never dubbed the remaining seasons when they released them. Would Luci Christian be the heavenly voice to do Rika Furude? Could we get Hilary Haag to do Satoko? Okay, that never came to pass.

This dub is a breath of fresh air. Rika doesn’t sound like Mihoshi. Satoko doesn’t sound fake, Keiichi doesn’t sound like a weird Sonic the Hedgehog. It’s perfect. ESPECIALLY BRITTANY LAUDA AS SATOKO! I knew the second she was cast as Satoko that she was going to excel the fuck out of this role. And I was not disappointed! The only voice I’m still not quite used to is Michelle Rojas as the Sonozaki twins. Probably because I was somewhat okay with Megan Hollingshed’s voice in the 2006 version that it’ll take some time! And we FINALLY got a voice for Hanyuu. I am super excited that Xanthe Huynh is the voice and I know she’ll do great with this role! With all of that said, here’s what you might recognize these folks from.

*Keiichi is now played by Khoi Dao (known for Kiriyama on March Comes in Like a Lion, Murata on Demon Slayer, Chaka on Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Pt. 3, and Iskhan on SAO: Alicization)

*Rena is now played by Emi Lo

*Mion/Shion is now played by Michelle Rojas (known for Shizu Delta on Overlord, Touka on Assassination Classroom, Minase on Psycho Pass, Kanan on Love Live Sunshine, and Kusakai on Keijo!!!!!!!!)

*Rika is now played by Apphia Yu (known for Rio on Assassination Classroom, Marie on Black Clover, You on Love Live Sunshine, Victorique on Gosick, Natsumi on Danganronpa 3, and Laki on Fairy Tail)

*Satoko is now played by Brittany Lauda (known for Riko on Made in Abyss, Meidri on Interspecies Reviewers, Lessar on Index III, and Ichigo on Darling in the FranXX)

*Hanyuu is played by Xanthe Huynh (known for Menma on Anohana, Haru on Persona 5, Hanayo on Love Live, Hidomi on FLCL: Progressive, PallaPalla on Sailor Moon Super S [redub], and Sachi on SAO)

ANY CHANGES IN YOUR HATE-O-RADE:

Okay Medea, let-a-rip!

*inhales and exhales*

Teppei Hojo is trash. He is ultimate trash. This fucker needs to be murdered in every timeline. He is a turd in a Glenn Quagmire shirt. Him and his wife are trash. And when this pile of trash is cheating on that pile of trash, he sleeps with peak trash named Ritsuko. Teppei Hojo needs to die in every timeline. Whenever Keiichi bashes this cum-burger’s head in with a blunt instrument, I scream at the top of my lungs, “DIE SCUM, DIE”! And nothing, I repeat, NOTHING will change my opinion of Teppei Hojo.

Episode 23.

Oh, fuck you Higurashi Gou!

MUSIC: Okay, thank you for proving me wrong. I did not despise the opening theme. Having Higurashi with no Eiko Shimamiya is like having Pokemon with no Rika Matsumoto. Or Rozen Maiden with no ALI PROJECT. But this new opening is fine by my standards.

That’s right, get the niceness of the review before I get angry down below.

THESE TIMELOOPS: Rika tries to find solutions to end her time-loop in June 1983. Much like the original series, we follow stories from the Onikakushi-hen, Watanagashi-hen, and Tatarigoroshi-hen arcs (the first three stories to Higurashi, although now these have different names). However, all of these arcs have different endings. And after a positive turnaround with Satoko escaping from her abusive uncle, shit goes south when Detective Ooishi, who up to this point has never suffered under the Hinamizawa Syndrome or died a painful death goes on a murderous rampage. Higurashi style! That means, he’s after Rika Furude, will slaughter anyone in his way, and scratching his neck because he sees maggots (part of the hallucination effect).

What the shit? Ooishi for the most part has been a great guy. With the exception of the Tatarigoroshi-hen storyline, he was a nice guy! In the limbo with Hanyuu, Rika now remembers who has killed her. Every time Rika dies up to this point, she never remembers who was the cause of her demise. Hanyuu implanted that power to remember the deaths and a clue for Rika to use and then she disappears.

Now seriously, imagine Rika’s plight here. She has been repeating the month of June 1983 for over a hundred years. And each of these times she repeats, she’s horribly murdered. Rika got the shit-end of the deal in the murder department in the original series, including being dissected on while alive. Then, leaving her bloody, naked corpse out in the open of the Oyashiro altar! She’s tired of this shit! She wants to live a happy life away from Hinamizawa. She wants to grow older, become a teenager, and have fun. And this series made it worse by having her die four times in one episode. Not just that, but murdered by the most unexpected people including Akasaka, Chief Kimiyoshi, Mion’s mother Akane, and Keiichi. Keiichi has never killed Rika in any of the timelines up to this point. He has killed Mion and Rena, but never Rika. Keiichi loves Rika! Welcome back to A Million Ways to Die in Hinamizawa.

I’ll just add decapitation, drowning in a lake, set on fire, drowning in a sewage pipe, and death by…um…

Alexa, play Chandelier by Sia.

ENDING: We all know by now that in the original series, Miyo Takano is the betrayer and the reason behind all the murders during the Cotton Drifting Festival. This time, it’s someone closer to Rika that’s causing Rika so much pain. After we watched the worst kinds of murders happen to Rika, the episode after gave us our answer. Satoko, Rika’s friend and confidant is not happy that Rika is turning her back on Oyashiro and Hinamizawa. All the while pulling out her intestines!

Oh Higurashi, don’t stop being gory!

Yes, Satoko is aware of past timelines much like Rika and is almost on a god-like state. So what the hell happened to her? I know Satoko’s past has been a cluster-fuck of horror with her brother disappearing, her parents dying, and every form of abuse from her uncle. But she was able to prevail after all that. After surviving 1983, a lot has changed in Hinamizawa. The three big families of Hinamizawa put an end to the Cotton Drifting Festival and claiming there is no curse of Oyashiro. Mion and Shion moved on and are going to high school. And Rika decides she wants to move away from this village. By attending St. Lucia! And she wants to do this with Satoko.

Oh, if you don’t recall St. Lucia, Shion attended this academy until she escaped during the Meakashi-hen arc. It was also the same school that Ange from Umineko attended. But of course Ange attended it in the 90’s and we are clearly in the 80’s. Moving on!

Rika and Satoko studied their butts off for years and their hard work paid off as both were admitted into St. Lucia. Now Rika was able to prevail and fit in with everyone. Satoko on the other hand couldn’t do the same as her grades took a dip, her manners are atrocious, and she doesn’t seem to fit in with anyone. And this caused a drift between Rika and Satoko! And so during a trip to Hinamizawa, Satoko went to the old shrine where she ended up getting sent to that limbo place Rika and Hanyuu were at many times before. There, she meets Eua (God, I hope that really isn’t her name). She’s much like Hanyuu except a lot more condescending. Oh, and she’s that mysterious shadow during the opening theme. She bestows the power to Satoko of reviving on death and returning to a certain point in time. In the hopes that Satoko is able to stop Rika from going to St. Lucia! But Rika is not going to budge. She wants out of Hinamizawa no matter what. And Satoko just wants to be with her friend no matter what. Satoko is even shown Rika’s past and still no dent in…Okay, this is bugging the fuck outta me. Pause the Ending portion!

MY GRIPES WITH SATOKO: Satoko, girl, the fuck is wrong with you?! I know Rika is like your main chick and everything, but for fuck’s sake loosen the grip you have with Rika. This season has changed you and not for the better. You made a connection with ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS from Hinamizawa. Big connections! At least in the original series you did. Look at your moments with Keiichi and Shion. Are you just going to shove them off? And what really sets me off is that Satoko literally had the opportunity to learn about Rika’s hundred year’s loop of death. And feels nothing about it! Only that it’s a challenge to break her herself! God damn, at the end of season one, Keiichi learned the truth and he was remorseful. This bitch doesn’t care that her friends were murdered in such a way. And Rika’s been shot in the head, had a live dissection performed on her, and other forms of torture…AND IT DOESN’T FAZE SATOKO!

I know in my original Higurashi review, I felt sorry for Satoko as she did seem to get the short-end of the stick living in Hinamizawa. I mean, her parents died right in front of her, she suffered abuse from her uncle, abuse from her aunt, ostrisized by the town for years, and a myriad of all types of shit to befall her. But Higurashi Gou has ruined this character. Rika didn’t really do anything wrong to Satoko. She didn’t snitch on her when Satoko got in trouble. She offered help to Satoko when she thought her grades were slipping. Satoko just held onto this petty vendetta. Satoko acted like Rika sexually assaulted her and have two other people gang rape her while drugging her. Okay, that’s a call for revenge, not your petty shit.

YOU SEE WHERE I’M AT WITH YOU SATOKO?! Your actions are so bad that you have me siding with the protagonist from Redo of Healer.

REDO.

OF.

HEALER!!!

I’m done with you! Girl, bye! We now return you to my talk about the ending already in progress.

BACK TO THE ENDING: Sorry, had to get that off my chest. Yeah, Satoko is leaving a bad impression on many of us who have been following the Higurashi story for years. And it just gets worse as she uses her new power for petty shit and abusing it at that. I mean, we saw Rika use her power in order to find a way to live past June 1983. Satoko is just using that shit to win some games and have things go her way. What else could this series bless us with? How about an epiphany from Teppei Hojo?

What?!

Teppei changes for the better.

What?!

Look, I admit that these moments with Teppei and Satoko were tame compared to the shit she’s pulled in the last several episodes. But this is Teppei Hojo! The same guy that used Satoko as his personal punching bag! The same guy who fleeced Rena’s father! The same guy many of us who cheer every time we see him on a moped because we know someone’s going to bash his head in with a baseball bat. Even my best friend knows how I am with this guy. When she gave me Higurashi free swag, I took everything except for Teppei. I don’t take trash. So seeing him so remorseful makes me…conflicted.

So now Satoko’s got things turned around for her. Her uncle has…changed?! Add to that, her God-like power. Satoko decides to change the past for her own advantage. This includes changing one of the biggest stories in Higurashi Kai with the kids vs. Miyo Takano. If Rika doesn’t experience the pain in those timelines, she won’t think about leaving Hinamizawa. And if she doesn’t leave Hinamizawa, she’ll stay with Satoko forever.

Oh what a tangled web of crazy Higurashi Gou was! I gotta tell you, Higurashi got me excited all the way up until we learn it was Satoko. And then it went straight to Hell. They turned Satoko into a straight-up selfish monster. Totally unlike the Satoko we’ve all grown to love in the original series. Yes, Satoko had those moments where, yeah, you would want to throw a chair at her and beat her ass with it. But that was only temporary! You would always see the good in Satoko despite that mischievous laugh and those episodes in Higurashi Rei. And God help me, I was a shipper of Rika x Satoko 10 years ago. Not a big one, but a supporter of it. Now, I would rather support Amourshipping from Pokemon than root for this. And I despise the living fuck out of Amourshipping. That should tell you something!

If original Satoko were bestowed the powers from Eua, I think things would be different. Satoko would probably use her powers to prevent all the bad stuff from happening to her friends and to her brother Satoshi. I mean, my goodness, not once did I see her think, hey maybe I should find a way to help my ailing brother. Change a few timelines, make him all better! And of course, feel sympathy for Rika’s plight. Do it for Rika’s sake, not your own selfish desires! Rika has died horrificly for hundreds of years. And I seriously just can’t get over Satoko’s reaction to that when she learned the truth. Instead, she wants to treat Rika like a caged bird. Best friend my ass!

Now can Higurashi SOTSU fix the hot mess of Satoko? Time will only tell! And good on them for having Higurashi air in the summertime. Summertime is for Higurashi! Autum is for Umineko. Speaking of, it’s been since 2009. Any chance you want to give Umineko the old reboot or sequel it sorely needs? Oh forget it! My likeness for this season is conflicted. I was annoyed by it, but I didn’t fully hate it. It’s just that last arc with Satoko really burned my beans. And I’m sure a lot of you all feel the same way.

Guys, if you want to watch Higurashi Gou, do yourselves a favor and watch the original series first. Let that swirl around your heads for a while. I know the creator tricked us at the beginning of this series thinking it was going to be an honest-to-God retelling. It is not! It is a sequel. And a sequel that isn’t based off a game or manga of all things. So fans are jumping into this with eyes closed! And if you’re a fan of Satoko Hojo, I’m sorry. I’m just sorry.

If you want to check out Higurashi Gou, it is available to watch on FUNimation and Hulu. But please, if you haven’t watched the original series, go to HI-DIVE now and watch “When They Cry” and “When They Cry Kai”. I think you can manage without watching any of the OVA’s.

I’d rather watch that Kira OVA where the fanservice is thin, you can practically lick off the whipped cream from the Sonozaki’s tit.

That should tell you something if I’m starting to say something nice about Higurashi Kira.

See you in a few months when Higurashi SOTSU comes out.

#anime review #Higurashi no Naku Koro ni #higurashi no naku koro ni gou #When they cry #when they cry gou #Rika Furude #satoko hojo #mion sonozaki #keiichi maebara #hanyuu #rena ryuugu #miyo takano #eua #teppei hojo

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