#he had a thing for her - she mates scummy men like him

[leviiackrman]

"Fashion is my second favourite F-word."

more edits || character page || x.x

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[thehighladywrites]

masterlist.

a court of thornes and roses

rhysand

ᜊ Beneath their smiles - your friends turn out to be using you, comfort and hurt

ᜊ Texting Rhysand - smau

ᜊ Sugar daddy Rhysand - big dick daddy rhysand spends cash on you and falls in love, breaking your agreement

ᜊ “Just one more, I know you can do it” - rhys has a massive breeding kink

ᜊ “This isn’t goodbye, this is simply see you later” - ex husband/baby daddy rhysand

ᜊ “I got you, darling…” - Rhys takes care of you on your period

azriel

ᜊ Texting Azriel - smau

ᜊ Texting Azriel pt. 2 - smau

ᜊ Need you so bad baby, please… - ovulation week hits you hard, you need your mate

ᜊ Azzie, I think your mom is super hot… - you meet azriels mother and develop a little crush on her

ᜊ I still remember the third of December, me in your sweater… - angst, just plain angst with a somewhat bittersweet ending

ᜊ “Tell me you’re mine” , “ i’m yours” - you dream that azriel was cheating on you and now you can’t look at him without being annoyed. It’s not really his fault, but still… azriel reassures you, promising that you’re the only one for him.

ᜊ “You can even call me daddy, give you someone to look up to” - sugar daddy azriel spoils you

ᜊ “If it’s so wrong, why does it feel so good?” - azriel is a stalker and pervy guy

ᜊ The sessions masterlist - nerdy azriel x bimbo reader

ᜊ “You were flirting with me?” - you doubt Azriel even likes you since all he does is stare into your soul. Azriel thinks he is very clear when he stares, why do you not understand that he is flirting?

cassian

ᜊ That’s your mother but she’s my wife first… - your kids loose their tempers, cassian reminds them who you are, nsfw, light angst, hurt & comfort

ᜊ The Airhead Chronicles: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5 - cassian is mates to a ditzy reader, and he loves her more than anything. How do they function together? - FINISHED

ᜊ “make her squirt on my balmain shirt” - cassian finds out you can squirt

eris vanserra

ᜊ Professor Eris x reader: part 1, part 2, part 2,5, part 3 part 4 part 5 - you hook up with this delicious older man for one fun night to forget your scummy ex, what do you do when the same man turns out to be your new professor? What do you do when that same professor had a dark secret? - ONGOING

ᜊ Vanserra brothers NSFW Alphabet - nsfw, crack, a sprinkle of angst

feyre archeron

ᜊ “let’s settle this catfight in the ring, let’s settle this in bed” - enemies to lovers, smut, angst, jealousy

elain archeron

soon

lucien vanserra

ᜊ Vanserra brothers NSFW Alphabet - nsfw, crack, a sprinkle of angst

acotar men x reader

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, sneaking out to a bar while you’re drunk - smau, multi men, tiny bit nsfw

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, using doe eyes on them - nsfw, multi men, headcanons

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, putting bows on their things - headcanons, multi men, cute asf

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, you being asexual - smau, multi men, headcanons

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, sassy man apocalypse - smau, multi men, crack

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, being their sneaky link - multi men, nsfw, headcanons

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, banning them from intimacy - multi men, nsfw, headcanons

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, meeting your parents - multi men, headcanons, crack, fluff

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, your child catches you in the act - multi men, headcanons, crack, nsfw

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, sitting on their lap - multi men, headcanons, nsfw

ᜊ ACOTAR men x reader, them as your baby daddies - multi men, nsfw

multi characters

ᜊ Breaking up with the acotar characters as a prank - smau, multi

ᜊ Texting “ She’s busy “ as a prank with the acotar characters - smau, multi

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, ” I had a really fun time yesterday. Oops wrong person ” - smau, multi

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, creepy man hitting on drunk reader - smau, multi, tiny bit nsfw

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, we need to talk - smau, multi

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, sending them nudes/lingerie pics - smau, multi, nsfw

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, asking them for hand pics - smau, multi, tiny bit nsfw

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, “can i get x’s number?” - smau, multi

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, doing elf on the shelf for your kids - smau, multi

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, random texts - smau, nsfw, multi

ᜊ nsfw visual links for them - multi, smut, nsfw,

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, “where’s my treat?” - multi, nsfw-ish

ᜊ ACOTAR characters using twitter; pt 1 | pt 2 - nsfw, swearing

ᜊ ACOTAR characters x reader, forgetting your anniversary - smau, angst, multi

throne of glass

multi:

ᜊ TOG characters x reader, sending them lingerie pics - smau, multi, suggestiveness

[bumbershots]

A CERTAIN ROMANCE

CHAPTER TWO: MONDAY THROUGH FRIDAY

Author’s note: Hello! Thanks a lot to everyone for reading this, I’m over the moon with the messages you sent after posting the first chapter. Keep them coming, and enjoy! ~ Alex

Story Masterlist ** Word count 2.3K ** 

If she was prettier and a bit smarter. If she were special, like the Instagram models that Teen Vogue features in their cover nowadays. She would have the guts to take three steps towards him and ask if he is who she thinks he is.

Harry is standing once again across from her, and she doesn't even know that he is wearing his beloved woolly jumper that has a picture of the planet Saturn on it, just for her. The girl wonders if they've heard of Styles on that planet, too. Of course they have, she scolds herself looking away from him at last, not believing her luck. For the third time on a Thursday, at half past three, he's jumping in the train right after her. The first time could've been luck, second one was a lovely coincidence but a third time? It's a charm. That's what her grandma would say.

But she isn't brave enough to walk up to him, not because of who he is, but the pressure and build up around the entire situation. What if he's a dickhead? She frowns at the thought, knowing it can't be true, not when his eyes, the so-called windows of the soul, are that nice.

They're both in a corner of the train this time, conversations start to sputter around as people try to keep their own talk ticking along on autopilot. He seems to be busy, reading Keith Richards' autobiography, she wants to talk to him about it, it's been a while since she read it though she still remembers it clear as day. The next one is his stop, she sighs in defeat at her own cowardly nature and takes out her mobile only to look busy.

Harry wants to talk to her, this is the third Thursday in a row, he's afraid there won't be a fourth one. He's back from his last meeting with Jack and Fernando, everything is set to start the renovation. He won't be taking this route anymore, it's now or never. But it's harder than he thought, to approach her and that's it, he doesn't know what he's supposed to do once he stands before her.

The speaker announces his stop, but instead of leaning away from the wall and walking out of the train, he flips the page of his book, letting the doors close and stays on the carriage for the next station. He is so nervous, a bit scared of his bold choice to stay on the line without a well defined plan. He's never been this nervous about talking to someone, the butterflies on his tummy at the mere sight of her are restless. Maybe if he scoots closer, little by little, he can nudge her side and mouth her a polite "hello," a warm smile afterwards so she doesn't think it's a come on. Except it is.

Harry closes his book, deciding that it's stupid and honesty is the best way to anything. He will just greet her and ask if he can buy her a cup of coffee someday, easy, breezy like Jack says. His green eyes follow her out of the train, they just reach Colindale station, before he can process what is going on or even move, the doors close and the vehicle is moving back to the tunnel. Away from her and his last chance. His mouth is dry and it's like he stuffed it to the brim with cotton.

He got off on Burnt Oak and switched direction, he was so mad at himself, the deep frown on his face said it all. This was supposed to be his chick flick moment and he ruined it by not doing anything at all. He keeps his face glued to the door closest to him, waiting for her to come up and smile at him in that knowing way. Perhaps then he would stand tall, mention that cup of coffee after introductions are made and she will agree. But she doesn't come back on the next station, or the three following ones. Harry gets off the train with a cloud looming above him, the wind is blowing in that nasty way that announces a storm following suit. The singer hurries to his home, trying to beat it.

The rain comes out of nowhere in full force just as Harry walks through his front gate, dashing to the inside of his house. He decides to fix himself a light lunch to keep his mind from wondering if she made it to her destination before the rain caught up with her. A text message from Jack does the trick, he sent him the address for Freddie's birthday. Harry can't believe that's tonight.

"Hello stranger," Gemma's voice greets the musician after the second ring. "All right?"

"All right, just forgot about plans I had for the evening," he hated to cancel dinner with his sister, "come with me?" Harry's tone is hopeful, she can almost picture his adorable cherub face, eyes sparkling.

"Is it with your teenage friends?" He hums trying to come up with a lie, "Harry we can have our dinner tomorrow night instead, I don't mind." As much as she loves her brother, that doesn't extend to that certain group of acquaintances.

"They're not that bad!"

"Baby brother, have fun with the lads, I'll see you tomorrow, pick me up at eight o'clock." She states before ending the call. Harry huffs before finishing his veggie wrap and jumps in the shower.

Perhaps he should've told Gemma that his mood tonight wasn't the best, that although he wanted to go out and about, he didn't want to do it alone. But her reasons to avoid his less mature group of mates are valid so he grabs his parka and his phone and, a little stooped, heads for the flat where the party is held.

A few years ago, he set himself three tasks: prioritise friends, learn how to be an adult, achieve a proper balance between the big and the small. Harry genuinely loves the fittings of his outfits before tour, playing his music for thousands. But he realised, as well, that the coolest things are not always the cool things. Tonight he's hearing anecdotes of how his friends sold almost everything they owned, to be able to afford a trip to the World Cup in Russia the year before. He knows that England almost made it to the final, but to see the agony and pain reflected on Freddie's eyes as he tells the story is truly humbling and heartbreaking.

"They had to escort me out, an hour after the match ended." The birthday lad finishes with glossy eyes. "I've never felt so powerless in my life, the world just seemed so unfair from then on, you know?" Harry doesn't, but he nods and finishes his drink. "But enough about good old me, what about you?"

"Same old, touring for a while, back in British soil before I take off again." He doesn't like giving rehearsed answers to his friends, but they're surrounded by at least a dozen people carrying out their own conversations while straining to hear what Styles says.

"Thinking about the next album already?" His friend's amazement is genuine, "can't believe what you'll hit me with next!" Freddie was his rocker friend. The one with an expensive vinyl collection, the one to never miss a Rolling Stones show, the one that religiously attended Glastonbury every year. Remembering this, Harry relaxed and decided to share with him a topic that left him vulnerable.

"You can expect a lot of break up songs that's for sure," he tries to joke but Freddie's smile falters a bit.

"How long has it been?"

"It'll be a year next month." He can't believe it still feels so recent and not at the same time. "I'm getting used to it." Freddie sighs and nods in understanding.

"I'm sorry you have to go through a shit thing like that, you're one of the good ones H," the green eyed musician is blushing, waving his hand at his companion in an attempt to dismiss his words. "It's the truth I mean... look around us, Jack has been on and off with Alexis for years," the two men observe the couple they're discussing, nothing seems wrong with them but Freddie's words are true, Jack has a habit of calling it quits with the redhead once she brings up marriage. "Kiera and Mosas cheat on each other all the time, we're not even sure if they're still together at this point... last but not least you have Alf, Christophe, Ruben and myself, four emotionally unavailable men who can't commit because they can't get their shit together." Silence takes over the two friends, it's deafening even though the background music can be heard loud and clear.

"I made some shitty decisions too, that's what drove her away," Harry wants to continue, the tequila shots seemed to have loosened his tongue.

"No, no, no you listen to me," Freddie's hands hold his younger friend's face carefully. "I know you're not a dishonest scummy man, you're allowed to make mistakes in a relationship and learn from them... don't be like Alf," he lets Harry's face go and nods towards the tallest guy in the room, "he had a brief relationship with a Portuguese girl, charmed her socks off and when she planned to move here guess what he did?"

"What?" Harry knew the answer, but he wanted to give his friend the benefit of the doubt.

"He cuts her off! Ghosting is what they call it nowadays. Just like that... and you think he learned, except that he doesn't!" His friend is now sounding too frustrated. "I saw him do the same thing to Al, perhaps it was a bit different she already lived here but she wanted more and just—" he can't finish his thought and Harry feels for his friend. "We all do that, it's a trend."

"Must be something in the water." The curly one tries to joke and he earns a soft smile from the birthday guy, along with a heartwarming hug. "You can always ring me Freddie, to chat and if I'm home see each other." Harry knows this is something new in their friendship, but he feels it necessary, after so many years of knowing each other. He can tell that Freddie is trying to find his way into adulthood, something that Harry had to experience at a much younger age due to his career.

"Thanks mate, I would really like that." Harry is about to ask Freddie about his family's well-being when a figure entering the room caught his eye, she was wearing the burgundy coat like that first Thursday he was lucky enough to lay eyes on her, high-waisted trousers. The newsboy cap was missing though, but he was glad because it gave her curly hair the freedom it lacked before.

Of all the places where he thought they might meet again, his friend's birthday party was certainly not on the list. She was here, greeting Jack and the others, pulling her sleeve to show how uncomfortable she was at making small talk with Alexis and Keira. She has to crane her neck up a bit when talking to, well pretty much anyone in the room.

This is the miracle he's been waiting for, he thinks just as the song changes to The Beach Boys' and a small smirk threatens to expand on Harry's lips, he does want to ask her if she wants to dance like the sixties tune suggested.

"Harry it's nice to see you again!" Fernando stands in the way blocking the view between the musician and the tube girl. He cringes a bit at the nickname and makes a mental note to learn her name, the sooner the better.

"Fer, I have missed you since we last saw each other earlier today," the architect laughs and so does Freddie. "Would you like a beer?" Forever polite Harry asks.

"No, I'm driving tonight but I'll fetch one for my sister," he says stepping around the bar where Harry and Freddie have been leaning against for the past hour, "I'm starving though, do you mind if I order something Fred?"

"I have some pizza in the fridge man, help yourself." Fernando thanks him before nodding to the person standing behind Harry.

"This beer alright?" Harry turns around just in time to meet a pair of chocolate eyes staring at the guy behind the bar and nod in acceptance. "You already know Freddie and this is Harry," the curly guy is speechless, now up close she seems prettier than before and real. "Harry this is my sister Alma." She smiles in a sweet way that makes the pop star wonder if he's about to go into cardiac arrest.

"I saw you in the tube, Hampstead station guy!" Her voice was nothing like he had imagined, it was raspy and a hint of an accent he couldn't quite put his finger on was swimming through her words.

"That's me..." he admitted, the pink blush from his cheekbones migrating to his ears. Alma thought he looked adorable.

"Do you wanna dance?" She asked after a big gulp of her beer. All star by Smash Mouth just started playing, that was definitely not what Harry wanted to dance with her. Not that he had a secret plan to woo her with his moves, he wasn't the best dancer.

But he took her hand and let her lead the way to the unofficial dance floor, that on a regular day was the dining room. Oblivious to all the eyes focusing on them, Harry allowed himself to enjoy the unexpected turn of events, he had already wasted precious time not talking to this marvellous woman. Like Freddie said, he had to learn from his mistakes, instead of repeating them.

///

Let me know if you like the story! *** Join the taglist!

///

TAG LIST: @laurxn-robinson

Next chapter

[quintiliusheartripper]

🤝 - 🙅 - 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦 - 🛡️- 🏙️ for Tryphon Mistsail (HANDSOME....)

he says thank you for the compliment 

;) 

🤝 What’s their opinion of other (playable) races?

Humans: His very best friend growing up was a human girl, a mute necromancer,  and was his co-captain. He is very fond of them even if for awhile they werent of him unless they were also a pirate. He likes to scare them sometimes. His one love is a human ad has a very deep soft spot for humans that do tolerate charr. He also, having grown up in a pirate crew that was so multicultural secretly worships the six that is..untill his feelings were pushed due to events in PoF. Still worships dwayna 

Norn: Great fighters! great drinkers! He loves them. he feels short beside them sometimes though, even though tryphon is 10ft. 

Asura: the asuran pirates hes met he loves! One of his best friends is an asura who believed in him and helped make the ship that he used when he got the resources. It was half airship half watership depending on where he wanted to go- the mists or the rest of tyria. As for non-pirate asura he thinks they are funny and likes to scare them however he has a lot of distrust in them and their ethics (ironic for a pirate)

Sylvari: He has a soft spot for sylvari as he helped free some from asura that wanted to experiment on them ages ago when they were recently discovered. he adores their colors and their curiosity and sense of humor =. many of his crewmates and closest links are sylvari because they stayed when he helped him.

charr arent included but im going to add a note anyway: with charr its complicated. He hates the organizing and he hates the anger and the wars! god he hated the war. He perfers to stay away from the black citadel and will only hang out at nareshes fahrar/home if he has to. He does however enjoy stealing from there... hes only been to the black citadel very recently (post mord death). He hates the air of the city though and hates how charr can be so mean to humans.. He does note however that, as much as he hates they are in a scummy area, it is one of the two cities that actually has homes for people outside of their own species... and he is amused by that. Did i say he hated the war he was pulled into due to the fact that he was considered a Blade warband member with a lot of talent that could help the war? well its made him more sour towards his own kind especially anyone who is dominion. Afterall he grew up in a vibrant multicultural setting!  but he loves naresh and the warband regardless 

🙅 Who do they consider their enemy(ies)?

MMM a interesting question. He has a few being a pirate.... One obvious enemy is other pirates, especially ones that dont have the same ideals as he does. He hates human(tyrian?) trafficking and whenever he finds out another crew does that he will make sure if he runs into them he will destroy them. If your on his crew and he finds out he will brutally give you a slow death. On that note anyone involved in human trafficking he hates and has killed a few nonpirates for it

He hates poeople who are funding the mistwar anjd feels those funds can go to people who are starving and more in need and to actually finding a solution to keep the war from spilling into tyria instead of sending men to die in a battle where their body isnt even able to be laid to rest on tyrian soils. He has stolen battle supplies just to say fuck you to them, with the exception of needed medical supplies.  ironic considering his one boyfriend was employed in the mists as a medic. 

When he was a cub he hated one of the crew mates that was close with the head captain and would abuse him behind his mothers back. Im not going to go into details but it was bad and its me putting down my own trauma that he never brings up anyway.  But hes dead and rightfully so. No one knows who the necromancer was that did it but whoever it was they got dead rats in the ship to eat him alive and tryphon soon left to form his own pirate crew after. 

he has extremely strained ties with those at rata sum and lions arch where he is wanted in rata sum and *was* wanted in lions arch. He hates the inquest and had a knack for slipping things in his pocket  when he harbors there but thanks to his asuran second mate he has been able to skate past the majority of devices they have tried to keep the 10 ft charr down with. Lions arch is a tricky one... theres places hes absolutely welcomed, especially in some of the more shadier areas however he was wanted for the longest time for crimes and while he has paid his fines and used a lover to get him freed he....is still not welcomed by one other person and that is....

Evon gnashblade. Tryphon hates him. Evon hates him back. hundreds and thousands of gems worth of goods...stolen. gone. No matter the ways evon tries to keep tryphons grubby hands off them. Tryphon loves it though! People will buy these goods on the black market and and he gets the gold without feeling one single ounce of being bad...all of it isnt exactly needd items like food afterall. Want a mount license? here you go... This sword stolen from him? yup if you got the gold... Honestly evon is probably absolutely fucking thrilled velak has been keeping tryphon from stealing too much because his profits are staying where they should be. They think of each other as scum And would I draw them hate fucking? yes.

👨‍👩‍👦‍👦  Who is their birth family? Who is their chosen family?

He knew his mother and loved her very deeply till the day she died. He misses her.  He has no clue who his father is but he has the same teal eyes as he does, a blood legion soldier,  and is on the dominion side. as for chosen family its velak and naresh and their warband and they have even started to have cubs via using a warband mates potions to make velak into a charr and to play with gender. While tryphon isnt the one in this pic here is them as kids camping: 

You have the eldest, kalix who looks most like Velak with his brown mane, human like eyebrows and beard. He has tryphons soft grey fur and nareshes stripes. He is a gaurdian like velak and tryphon (pre-revenant. i have a headcanon that revenants can keep some of their previous powers) and deeply cares for his family and loves quite fully. He gets together with one of quints sons, Shattered summit 

Then there is the twins....

Big hulking charr at 13ft like their grandfather and i designed their looks based off chinese stone lions. They arent the brightest but they have big hearts and have taken on to being mercinaries...well...kind of...mostly these jocky himbos just protect their youngest sister and party and eat a lot . They buddy up with quints youngest who is also massive and is also a jocky himbo

then he has his youngest, a smart little girl who is basically a were-charr where she is charr during certain times and human during othertimes (havent decided whether its by season or by moon yet lmfao) She is very smart and brilliant and is a cute calico charr because i wanted something that feels ‘domesticated’ and soft 

🛡️ Weapons? He loves his rapiers... I use the lord faren ones in game since they are beautifully ornate and suit the pirate. 

🏙️ Major city?

thats a hard one... I would say the grove. He often goes there to see some of the sylvari he has saved but also its where he can rest easily without being arrested. He also doenst steal here and actually has his bank here. The second fav would be lions arch for reasons.. obviously because its the pirate capital and its where he makes his money. He also loves going to a burlesque club that he will throw money at two rose sylvari podmates that he helped free from inquest and he basically sees them like his own daughters if im honest lmfao. He is basically my robin hood complexed character 

[goatpaste]

god out here seein butchleopardstar talkin bout their old wc oc and i just have this urge to show my old ones ESPEcially ones i still have

also a fun lil look into my shitty old art 

angel was like my big first MAIN wc oc and she was called angelwing/angelstar and was the leader of demonclan a group of demon monster cats. she was married to a dude named devilheart (who is now a retired oc sorry devilheart) and they had kids and they all fought the forcesss off eeeeviiil. 

i still  own her and love her, my special first oc,,

Devilheart who is a now retired oc he was angelstars mate and was just a demon who was a big softy who loved his wife but had a temper for annoying people

dragonflight another member of demonclan and one of angelstars friends, he had the stupid storyline of being in love with angelstar despite her having a family and then also being in an unhappy marriage with a lady named blizzardlove

hes a retired oc

blizzardlove who was dragonflight mate and had the exact same storyline but with her being in love with devilheart.

she is oc retired now, but if i was smarter then i woulda relized she was in love with angel

brightflower (now just bright) was one of angelstar and devilhearts kids and was just a very sweet big hearted girl shes still that and loves her mom very much shes just not a cat anymore and is like her current moms story and is in lesbians with one of their evil mortal enemies pride

puretime (now just pure) was another one of angelstars kids who was just for the most part a regular cat but like a werewolf became a giant unstoppable monster on a blue moon that attacks everyone. hes very shy and nervous and scared of himself current him i still own and hes just about the same but he’s people, not related to angel and whatever but he still got scary werewolf live monsters livin in him

ghost flower was the third kid of angelstar and devilheart. she was a ghost cat demon thing and was super rowdy and i loved her a lot of the three. she was angelstars deputy.

now she retired having not been used in years

god THIs oc i didnt even remember existed until i saw her on my DA. her name is Applebabble she was apparently Puretimes daughter and has a speech impediment but the ability to copy voices.

she defiantly got retired oops lol

Envy who was the daughter of Angelstars mortal enemy Reborn but envhdsgsdk envy hated being apart of a family of evil and just wanted to be a normal good person. shes TECHNICALLY not retired i still draw her mom and sibling but i also havent drawn her in years

sinborn the first born on Reborn and favirote daughter.

she means and cruel and knows she favorite and plays to it. she steps on her sisters all the time and its a lil bastard

she was retired a long time ago,,,

Pride who was reborns (at the time son) third daughter who was just a typical scummy bastard who fell in love with angelstars daughter brightflower and is just trying to balance being super evil with being smithened by one of the sweetest lil light in the universe and pride still the same except lesbians now

reborn, the big miss bady of my childhood she was just totally evil through and through and loved to be bad and be a pain on angelstars life. now shes still angelstars mortal enemy but with homoerotic subtext

solarspark, this ugly ugly design im so sorry i did that to you apparently he was suppous to be Brightflowers son who had an obsession with know who his mystery father was i guess defiantly a retired oc

Mirrorpool, Solarsparks brother. who was a lot chiller and big ‘no care’ attitude. he loved his mother and was very sure of himself and his skills.

a retired oc that i still do love the design on. simple but cute

god plush was a stupid ass character whos whole thing was that he could stand and was in love with a gang member but in a no homo way and was defiantly homophobic

now hes just plush the guy defiantly and openly gay for the hot gang leader. and he still stands and is just a furry oc now

Nightkit, designed for a wc rp group on DA, drew her once and then forgot she existed lol

Waxwhisker, also made for that group of wc Rp stuff that i immediately forgot about. he meant to be in waterlcan

timetravler who was as his named said, is a timetravler. he would just show up around leafclan who take people on timetraveling adventures. and was V gay he would often turn these adventures into romantic gestures for handsome men.

i still own this one! idk why i felt like i couldnt let him go,,,

east who was apart of my ‘compass ocs’ he was just a fancy cat who raised his adoptive son west and hate siblings of north and west. they really jdshgds didnt have much story beyond that? idk why i made them

hes just a bunny named east now lol

then west to go along with east. he was just baby cowboy supreme.

south who was just big big meany, she was just very grumpy and violent. 

souths brother north who hh is a polar bear now and doesnt have a full up to dte ref, im workin on it lol

but got his old art and design, bad

spookyfire who was apart of my old rp friends clan Hauntedclan and they lived in an abandond mansion. she ws married to the leader lizardstar and they had maNY baby

she is retired U.U

Wickedspell, one of spookyfires many baby

she makes potions and is a lil witch

i tried to revamp her a few times over the years but yknow

things happen

Battlestar, another of spookyfires kids, leader after Lizardstar of Hauntedclan

retired character

Zerogravity anOTher one of spookyfires kiddos she was a sweet lil lady who was with a guy named Arksoul who stood by her after she learned herself incapable of kids.

retired character

wire who was the leader of my own baby version of bloodclan, known as savageclan. wire was an absolute monster who abused those around him and threaten even those he loved to get what he wanted.

his clan was located in a nearby abandoned power plant

his mate scrawnyskull left him with their kids after she realized how horrible he was.

scrawnyskull, Wires ex mate. she and her sister was a pet taken from her home by savageclan cats and raised in their terrible ways. she was later made wires mate. When scrawnyskull realized how far wire was willing to go to get what he wanted, she left behind her life in savage clan to raise her kids in a nearby clan iceclan.

now shes just a big monster lady oc who loves her babies

flora, shes scrawnyskulls daughter

thats about it, and i still have her around

phantum, scrawnyskulls son whos just a lil guy

storm, another one os scrawnyskulls kids, a stubborn lil guy

retired oc

Flare, scrawnyskulls sister who like swanyskull was taken from her home as a pet and made a member of savageclan. she too late realized how bad savageclan is after her sister left 

now she just a kitty cat furry oc lol shes the fun aunt

Force, one of my savageclan memebers she hated savageclanbut leaving wasnt  really an option

retired oc

another savageclan clan oc named scratch, he knew savageclan was bad but figured noone else would have him at this point

retired oc

twitch, another savageclan character. lazy bastard

retired oc

killier, another saveclan kitty who was stolen from his home as a kid and is now one of wires trusted bodygaurds

Fang, lil lady of savageclan

retired oc

badger and wolf, savageclan bastard brothers

oh they irritating

retired oc

Hollow, savageclan cat. saved by savageclan warriors as a child would have died if not for them. feels in dept to them

retired oc

snipe, savageclan warrior taken from his pet home at a young age. learning of his orgins in adulthood came to have a fascination for humans

retired oc

Fox savageclan lady

retired oc

Diamond, pretty savageclan lady

retired oc

leafclan warrior SafariPuma

now hes just a big muscle tiddy kitty

bright?? who was just a cat made of blood?

retired oc

cabbitleap, just a cat rabbit grumpy man

retired oc

icestar, leader of my iceclan i made forever ago

retired oc

rosedew, daughter of icestar and her mate snaketail

ragingstar, first leader of iceclan. spunky loud lady

now shes is named flamingo and is mmm creature!

goddessstar, leader of stellarclan

retired oc

Dim horrible daughter of goddesstar 

retired ocs

silentnight, i think i made her just to have that name

retired oc

his name is fucking coxdream, he was half cat half fox and at age 10 or whatever just DID not relize the motherfucker name sounded like that

now his name is still cox dream and now hes just a horny joke/serious character lol 

Gracie, a loner who easily fell in love and constantly had her heart broken

now shes a zombie and falls in love and then eats the people she likes which sucks

B their a ninja cat

Dagger, cyborg cat who was experimented on

now shes a cool fortune teller with robot parts for fun

wasp was probably one of my first cat ocs when i started being into warriors  i still have him and love him and im currently designing him a boyfriend,,

brown who was friends with wasp 

i think she could technically be said to be one of my first fursonas lol

retired oc

badsmog, never did much wqith her beyond design

still have her as smog and she is creature

[sheepsandcattle]

Chapter 15

It’s almost ten o’clock at night and it’s only his first deal of the day, but he has a party to go to right after this and reckons he’ll get some business there too. His hopes of bringing Jordan along were shattered when he got called to cover a shift all night so he’ll have to stomach it alone.

The deal is dead easy; just some pot for a group of kids downtown. They do his head in a bit, always want him to roll the joints for them before he gets there because they’re shit at it. They never question his prices though (because they’re clueless) and they always buy in bulk (because there's about a dozen of them) so he can’t complain.

He drives to the party right after and parks in an alleyway where cuts a few lines on top of a book of roadmaps before he climbs out of his car. He’ll come back for it sometime tomorrow. Probably.

It’s a group of girls that welcome him inside. They’re gathered in the front yard, cradling beer bottles and leaning against each other as they laugh at whatever it is pretty girls laugh at.

“Curly,” Lola calls, grinning as he makes a detour from the path to approach them on the lawn.

He’s not seen her since that night he hallucinated the devil and black holes. She’d taken his number and swore to get in touch if she needed any gear from him, and now she’s hugging him like they’re best friends and introducing him to the girls around them whose names go right over his head. Doesn’t matter though ‘cause they all wanna buy tabs off him so the conversation drifts from names and “we met at”s pretty quickly.

He fills Lola in on the Jordan situation (she’s not seen him since his initial crisis and she wants to hear every detail) and then at some point he does a bit more coke with Lola’s boyfriend and wins three games of pool before his second line really catches up to him and he begins to see his heartbeat.

Lola and… Dylan? Damon? Dylan. Lola and Dylan’s bed is so fucking soft and when he sits on it he gets sucked up into the sheets and engulfed by the mattress and for a while all he sees is white and all he feels is warmth until Lola tells him to sit up and he’s forced to come up for air.

She says, “have you ever worn make-up?”

Curly leaves the room with purple over his eyes and red on his nails. He’s been wearing nail varnish since he worked at Costa (and got sick of feeling scummy for always having coffee under his nails) but the eyeshadow is all new to him. 

He takes out his phone to text Jordan because he just knows he’d want to know all about it.

“Hello?”

Oh. Wrong button.

“J,” he breathes, humming as he smiles into the phone. “I’ve got eyeshadow on.”

He hears a chuckle on the other end of the line and Jordan says, “no kidding.” A pause. It’s his cue to speak but he’s busy admiring his now-red fingertips. “What colour?”

“Red,” he announces with confidence, and then, “I mean purple.”

“You get mixed up?”

“Yeah,” Curly sighs. “My nails are red.”

He hears ruffling on Jordan’s side and then a long yawn before the man asks, “you got a ride? Want me to come get you?”

“No, you’re at work.” Curly laughs because he can be so daft sometimes. “And y'sound shattered.”

“Curls, it’s 5am. Finished two hours ago.” Jordan clears his throat sleepily and Curly’s just now realising that he’s woken him up. “I’ll get a cab to you and we’ll walk back. M’not sure I’m clear to drive. We’ll get some air, ‘kay?”

5am. He’s lost some time, then.

“Yes please.” He can hear Jordan moving around again.

Curly is sat on a kitchen countertop but reaches out to nudge one of Lola’s friends as he whispers, “hey,” to get the attention of the group of girls. Lola has a hand on his chest just in time to keep him from toppling off the counter.

“Careful,” she giggles, and he has their attention now.

“My boyfriend’s coming,” he says, covering the phone with his hand so Jordan can’t hear him. “My boyfriend’s coming,” he repeats and he knows they heard him the first time but it just sounds mint, doesn’t it?

All the girls are beaming and Curly has to stop to tell them how pretty they all look. One of them asks, “when?”

He repeats the question into his phone and he’s sure Jordan says he’s around the corner.

“That was quick.”

There’s chuckling on the other end. “Not sure I’d call twenty-five minutes ‘quick’, angel,” J notes.

Hm. Losing time.

Angel.

He’s not sure when he got here, but Jordan’s wearing a black bomber jacket that Curly’s never seen before and he wants to bury his face in his neck because, although Jordan entered his sight rubbing his hands from the cold, he looks all warm and cosy and nice in there. His hair’s a bit messy and he scratches his head as he watches in amusement as Curly approaches him. God, he’s fit.

“You’re proper fit.”

Jordan just gives a clouded laugh and buries his fingers in Curly’s hair when he slumps against him. He takes a deep breath against Jordan’s shoulder, cold air rousing his consciousness a little before he leans away to point at Lola and his new (nameless) friends.

“That’s Lola,” he introduces and then gestures to J. “This is Jordan. My — Dylan! My boyfriend’s ‘ere.”

“Alright,” Jord mutters from the side of his mouth, but it’s all light-hearted as he gives him a nudge and nods towards Dylan when it’s too late and they already have his attention. “Hey,” he says a little awkwardly like he’s not sure what Curly expected him to say.

“Hey man, I’ve heard good things,” Dylan chuckles, but Curls doesn’t remember telling him about J. Well, he doesn’t remember much from tonight, really.

Jordan’s laughing too. “I bet,” he says, then turns to Curls to ask, “you had a good night?”

Curly hums.

“Ready to go home?”

He hums again, nods his head.

***

The walk back to J’s doesn’t feel like forty minutes. Walking is easy if he keeps his pace up, but every so often he slows down when he gets distracted and stumbles a little. A bit like riding a bike, he thinks.

He walks with his hands in his pockets at first (which are empty of drugs now: baggies replaced with bills that he’ll have to wait ‘til the morning to count) but soon realises that he needs Jordan’s hand for balance.

They’re three blocks away and he wants Jordan to see the eyeshadow that’s still clinging to his lids.

“Do you like it,” he asks as he sways, caught by Jordan’s right arm, which pulls him into the man’s chest as he chuckles.

“I do.” His voice isn’t sleepy like it was on the phone and Curly’s about to say this, but he remembers that he’s already spoken to him since then. Remembers that some time has passed - some lost and some not.

Jordan pushes him back a bit and holds his cheeks, examining his eyes and most likely just humouring him when he says, “we’ll have to buy more colours, doll.”

“Blue,” Curly whispers.

“Yeah, blue. And—“

“Hey, J.”

The voice isn’t either of their own, and both of their heads turn at once, Jordan’s hands dropping to his sides as Curly wobbles a bit, still smiling.

Jordan’s not smiling.

The guy’s tall but hunched in a black hood. He and Jordan seem to be having some kind of stare-down as another figure in a similar stance looms a few feet back.

Jordan asks, “what the fuck do you want,” which Curly is about to give him a good shove for (because there’s no need to be rude) but Jordan pushes him a few steps back first and he decides not to intervene.

The man takes a step towards them as Curls says, “we don’t want any trouble, mate.”

Maybe it’s because he’s off his face on coke, or because it really does happen so fast, but one minute Jordan’s arm’s guarding him, and the next it’s gone and Curly’s wrists are twisted behind his back. Jordan and one of the hooded men (Lord knows which one) are a blur of fists and faces and he’s almost too distracted to feel the hand of the bloke behind him snake its way into his pocket.

“Stop,” he says pathetically because there’s a flash of red and he doesn’t know whose blood it is - doesn’t even remember why he’s not at the party anymore until he does again. He doesn’t know who he’s talking to either, but by the time the guy behind him is cramming Curly’s money into his own pocket, Jordan’s shoved up against the wall of whatever building they’re outside and Curly doesn’t give a shit about a couple-hundred dollars anymore.

Jordan’s nose is pouring with blood and Curly tries again. He shouts, “fucking stop! What-”

The blond’s head whips to the side when another punch is thrown, Curly’s voice entirely ignored. Then Jordan’s looking down between himself and the stranger like he can’t keep his head up anymore.

Except the stranger is frozen too. Come to think of it, so is the guy behind Curly, holding his wrists a little looser now. The man trips over himself as he steps away from Jordan, who lets him go without a struggle. The hoodie steps back, palm pressed to his stomach as he stumbles, his shadow slipping away and letting the streetlight reflect off the whites of J’s eyes and blood below his nose and blade in his hand. Wait-

Jordan’s still holding the knife up, even now both men have stood down, one doubled over as the other stands shaken on the spot.

Curly’s free from his hold now. Doesn’t remember when the guy let him go but doesn’t remember how to move either.

Using the end of the bade to point between the men, Jordan spits, “give him the fucking money,” and Curly’s not sure how J saw that happen when even he almost missed it.

Regardless, the man is quick to pull the money out of his pocket and shove it into Curly’s chest as he mutters, “alright, alright.”

“And tell Nick that if I see any of you again, I’ll fuckin’ kill you, ‘right?”

They watch one man slump against the other as they stagger back up the street, weaving a little in the middle of the road but never once looking back to check they’re in the clear. Curls and Jordan didn’t want any trouble, he’d told them that.

“Who was that?”

“Nobody.”

“Who’s Nick?” He feels ill.

“Nobody.” Jordan doesn’t look himself at all. His jaw twitches as it tenses and his lip curls sourly as he catches his breath.

“You stabbed him,” he observes, shaken, and Jordan just hums as he wipes the knife on his jeans because, really, what’s there to say? “W-will he be alright?”

J spits blood onto the curb as he tucks the knife somewhere between his shirt and jeans. His nose is still bleeding, dripping onto the pavement until he pulls up his shirt, wipes it over his mouth and neck then lets the fabric fall back over his stomach again.

“He’ll be fine. Barely touched him.”

There are drops of blood on the pavement that don’t belong to Jordan though, and Curly takes a minute to let his eyes follow their trail up the street - at least as far as the orange streetlights let him see.

“Curls. I know what I did,” Jordan promises (it sounds like he’s promising) but he still doesn’t look like himself. Not because of the blood or the welt beneath his left eye, but something else that he can’t put his finger on.

He’s forcing himself not to step back as the man approaches him, but then Jordan asks, “did he hurt you,” and his eyes are soft again and Curly’s not scared.

***

This ‘Nick’ character and his two knob-head mates are still a mystery to Curly, but asking about it makes J go quiet and cold, so he stops after a while.

When they get home that night, Jordan is washing his face over the bathroom sink, shirt left in the living room somewhere while Curly sits on the couch and watches him through the open door. Jordan says, “trust me, it was nobody. I—“ He pauses to splash his skin with water once more, then turns off the tap. “I told you I owed a few favours - shit just gets personal. Those guys shoulda know better than to—“

“I’m not trying to… Have a go,” Curls says, feeling almost entirely sober now. “I just thought you said that stuff was done. I just didn’t… Expect to—“

“I know.” He’s stood in the doorway now, drying his face in a towel. “We won’t see them again.”

Jordan tells Curly that he’s an idiot to be dealing in Brockton without any way to protect himself. He gives him a switchblade, teaches him how to use it without losing a finger and shows him where to hide it without slicing his dick off.

J knows loads of mint knife tricks that put Curly’s one-handed shuffle to shame, but he refuses to teach him because “it’s not safe.” Curls reckons he really just wants to be the only one that can do tricks.

He’s all too aware that he’s taking the entire situation just a little too lightly, but supposes Jordan is right; dealing in Brockton without something to protect himself with doesn’t seem smart. Besides, J talks a big game and Curly believes him when he says those guys won’t be an issue anymore.

They collect his car from the alley the next day and Curly tries not to check on the state of the pavement through his window when they drive through the street three blocks away.

[aw-tryagain]

Wow

People really don’t like hearing the truth about what they do and it shows. How can y’all misinterpret what I was saying THAT badly??

Like this was just my final straw I am done with the fandom. Y’all are all so damn ignorant and petty. Y’all will literally hate on someone for doing what you do! How does that make sense?! I’m just tired of y’all and have been for such a long time now and have been less and less involved in this fandom as time went on because I too began to notice things about how yall act and treat each other and yes y’all really are all so fake and after this whole shit show I just can’t do it anymore. Lol like I knew twilight was shitty but there were still a lot of things I loved about the series and I saw so much potential in it and I recognized the shitty parts and also tried to change them to make it better and that’s what a lot of people or pretty much everyone does in this fandom, but y’all just don’t recognize the shitty parts. Y’all try to excuse it. Especially when it comes to the main characters. Y’all will literally jump through hoops to excuse or just flat out ignore Alices racism and how she treats Bella. Y’all will excuse/flat out ignore Edwards fucked up abusive actions towards Bella yet will turn around and vilify Jacob for kissing her without her permission and guilt tripping/manipulating her too. Yall vehemently hate the shit out of Jacob (and are sometimes really racist about it) and will make posts/headcnons/au’s of the cullens beating him up a native brown boy for basically doing to Bella what they literally do to her through the entire series, take away her bodily autonomy and choices and manipulate her. Yall make posts about old white racist people literally beating up a 16 year old Native American boy and jack off to that shit and be racist all while y’alls precious whites can do anything they want to Bella because nothing the Cullens ever do is wrong. Y’all are literally playing right into the hands of that racist author SM and what she wanted and what she pushed so hard in the series you’d have to be blind not to see.. and you don’t see it.

Y’all still perpetuate the bs Meyer pushed and are all so ignorant because Jacob wasn’t like that at first and was never supposed to be like that. Meyer ruins every character she touches ESPECIALLY when it comes to poc but instead of looking at that y’all would rather act like assholes and treat people who like these characters and want to remake them in their own image like shit. Yet you all want people to stop calling you racist for loving and excusing Jaspers time in the confederacy and let you all redeem him and his actions. There was a whole fandom fight about this exact thing when someone called out the racist shit these people were doing regarding Jacob and the Cullens and guess what y’all did? Y’all tried to not only defend what y’all were doing but also tried to defend the fact that Jasper was a literal confederate soldier. Like, Jasper was one of my favorite characters but that doesn’t excuse what he was. You people are the most hypocritical people I’ve ever met. Y’all can make excuses for Jasper being a confederate and say “oh well he learned from that! He’s not a racist!” and y’all can make headcanons trying to redeem him but don’t seem to wanna redeem him from the problematic things he does in the series to this day which y’all seem to always leave out and forget. Y’all can say “oh Meyers and idiot! She didn’t know what she was doing! Jasper should have been a union soldier!” and all types of shit but nobody can do the same for Jacob who was actually fucked over by Meyer and made to do problematic things not only because he was the rival but also because Meyer loves making poc the villains all the time? How can y’all not see that?

Y’all make excuses up the wall for the precious Cullens fucked up actions and will gladly blame the author and not the character for it and will attack anyone who thinks otherwise but when it comes to anyone else? especially poc? It’s time to hate them and treat them and anyone who likes them and tries to actually redeem them from their racist biased author, like shit. It’s funny how we’re supposed to love the confederate soldier who willingly fought for slavery and quickly rose through the ranks in the army and seems proud of that fact when recalling it in Eclipse and he’s just so smart and practical and calculative and is such a great leader and thinks things through and is able to convince others easily and get them to follow him because he’s so charming but we’re also supposed to feel bad for him and hate the Mexican woman who “manipulated” him and lied to him and of course she’s painted as some kind of evil seductress who manipulates the poor defenseless mindless white man that we all must coddle. I italicized those words bc that is supposed to be his characterization. People who are calculative and smart and good leaders aren’t so easily manipulated and aren’t so easily trusting, and don’t fall for one obvious lie for 100 years! Idc what anyone says nobody can keep up a simple ass lie for that long especially when with just a little more thought put into it, the lie can be debunked so easily bc the truth is right there. Also in the end he had the power. He could do what he wanted with his own body and he chose to do what he did. We’re not gonna blame the woman for the actions of the man. Yes she had a part in it and influencing it but there is no way he couldn’t have felt the deception and do nothing about it or at least feel some type of way about it. If he’s so strong and powerful and dangerous and controlled all those newborns and is so much stronger and better than María why didn’t he stage an uprising or something? Don’t give me that “he didn’t know what he was doing” excuse. It’s the same tired ass excuse y’all use for him being apart of the confederation and it makes no sense. He was able to think for himself (and apparently has a strong smart vampire brain) and do for himself and literally had power over himself and others. This is literally me saying that the shit doesn’t add up from what we know from canon. It doesn’t make sense and I’m calling out the plot holes and why it doesn’t make any sense and why it should be taken with a grain of salt. Because it’s bullshit.

This is NOT me saying “men can’t be abused” or some other shit y’all want to put into my mouth. Like you guys do all the time. But of course he didn’t actively choose to make any of those decisions and act upon it on his own, no it’s all the woman (Maria’s) fault for every single thing he did. He was completely mindless and stupid and didn’t stop to think about anything once. I am in NO way saying that María wasn’t wrong for the lie that she told him or the manipulation or whatever it’s definitely wrong but it’s also unfair that she is the only being hated for it when the main characters do the same shit?! Yet everyone ignores it because it’s not abuse when they lie and manipulate. It’s unfair that people who like her and see the error in the way she was created and want to change that or whatever and ship her with Jasper get hate for it yet you guys can do the exact same thing with your faves and their issues? THATS WHAT IM CALLING OUT! I’m not mad bc y’all “don’t ship abuse” I’m mad because you’re all hypocrites and you all fail to see it. It’s said that she did lie and manipulation and it’s “implied” as abuse and people take that little bit of info and run with it (like they do a lot) and make it out like María is the worst person ever to walk the earth and was lying to him constantly about every little thing ever and was sexually abusing him and was physically beating him even tho NONE of this is EVER stated in canon. Y’all vilify the shit out of her (the hate gets so bad I’ve seen people literally act like she’s dirty and impure and beneath compared to the special white savior and all bc she’s the manipulative colored rival and that’s ANOTHER place where the racist undertones come to play.) bc Meyer painted them as this turbulent problematic relationship with the bad colored promiscuous sexually deviant woman and then Jasper finds a pure white woman and they have the bestest, healthiest relationship ever. They don’t tho. Alice lies to him too. Alice lies to him a lot in the saga and actively keeps things from him. Alice talks down to him and teams up with Edward and is on his side all the time to treat him like a child and basically act like he’ll never be as good as them when it comes to bloodlust (Edward legit says this shit about him but yeah this family is sooo loving and they believe in him soo much blow me.) She kicks him and stomps on his foot when he has thoughts or does something that isn’t ~Cullen like~ and that’s okay? That’s supportive? Jasper himself manipulates her emotions without her permission and tells her to not worry about important people that are supposed to be “family” and manhandles her when she had that vision and this is supposed to be so much better? This is supposed to be one of the best relationships in the saga because ~mates~ and tru wuv?! Their whole courtship and mating doesn’t even make a lick of sense why would he go into a diner? full of people? Especially if he was hungry?! That doesn’t make sense! How could she have possibly had a vision of him? and then automatically assumed she was supposed to be his ~mate~ that makes even less sense, and they’re incompatible and are pretty scummy to each other but it’s disguised as pure mated mystical love, by Meyer.

We’re supposed to like it and it’s supposed to be great but it’s not and I don’t because I see holes and I’m not falling for Meyers bullshit excuses to cover her own ass; we know Meyer has a problem with showing vs. telling but we also know she has a problem with making things that are supposed to be good look terrible. but his relationship with the big bad Mexican is the one that’s completely wrong and supposed to be feared? He has more in common with said Mexican woman and pretty much acts just like her! He went along with her and what she wanted and didn’t stop and think about what the fuck he was doing and he’s known to do this in canon because he literally said that he did the same thing with Alice. He was made to feel powerful and capable even if what he was doing wasn’t morally sound. Also omg over time they eventually began to have some real feelings for each other from their little relationship they had on the side or whatever and to this day they’re still friends with each other and Jasper thinks about her from time to time and wishes her well. They actually GREW to be friends and actually had some kind of development and progress in their relationship. Their okay with each other now even with their turbulent past and Jasper doesn’t hate her. Like at all and you mean to tell me that’s bad? It’s just horribly abusive and people have no right to ship it or even like it and/or indulge in it because they may see some potential with what Meyer did with them and want to build on that and improve it??? We ALL know Meyer creates a lot of things, characters, plot points with soo much potential but always ruins it and people in fandom see that and want to change it and love it and bring out that potential but when it comes to certain characters and ships (mainly involving poc) that’s off limits? Yet y’all do the same thing with yalls boring ass white canon characters and ships or just ignore the ships/characters issues in general??? But feel like y’all got the right to play god and be all high and mighty and holier than thou and viciously attack people for doing what y’all want to do??

Now That’s a fucking joke.

Not only is it a joke it’s also unfair. Who tf are y’all to dictate what someone can and can’t like/indulge in??? and I love how everyone wants to claim “oh I don’t ship Edward/Bella Jasper/Alice etc... bullshit! All y’all do is talk about them and make headcanons and au’s and shit that’s what this fandom mostly consists of, quit fucking backtracking and lying. This doesn’t even begin to explain all things wrong with this hypocritical ass fandom but this rant is more so related to what just happened that was my last straw and made me leave that ignorant ass shitshow of a fandom.

You people read that whole passage that I wrote calling out unfair treatment and fucked up behavior and you STILL just watered it down to “oh they’re just mad because we don’t ship abuse” YES YALL DO! and that’s the problem!!! You guys HATE it when people talk shit about y’all and look down on y’all for liking twilight and tell y’all not to like it bc it’s riddled with abuse and manipulation regarding the main characters and you all come up with your own excuses and reasons (however valid or not they may be) for still liking and indulging in it and trying to fix. Yet you turn around and do the same thing to your own people in the fandom who only ask for/want the same thing y’all ask/want from twi-haters? I was calling out y’all hypocritical actions that is sometimes rooted in racism and how it’s fucked up! I was also calling out how y’all vehemently disrespected, mocked and attacked a real life human person and egged on the op for childishly being a dick to someone for no reason and you all made fun of them for VERY POLITELY requesting something Jasper/Maria related and yet y’all call yourselves nice and accepting? If you didn’t want to do it you could have just kindly told them that you didn’t want to do it. You didn’t have to make a joke moodboard post acting like you’re disgusted (funny how we all must be disgusted with the dirty impure Mexican lol) and the rest of y’all didn’t have to reblog it acting like op was so smart and funny and putting shit in the tags like “why do people ship them lol” “like grow a braincell pls” or “open ur mind” like y’all need to open your minds and realize y’all ain’t shit for that and it WRONG! It was RUDE! Wanna ask “why do people ship them” why do YOU ship shit like Edward/Bella, Jacob/Bella, Jasper/Alice, Victoria/James etc...?? Y’all collectively froth over Victoria and excuse her yet she did. the. exact. same. shit!! Albiet badly, but Come ON! now it’s suddenly okay and excuseable when you throw some white skin on it? Why do YOU even like TWILIGHT if it’s riddled with so much shit?! Racism, sexism, homophobia. If anyone needs to “grow a braincell” it’s y’all. Also yes, let’s attack people and call them dumb and stupid all for what they ship. That’s good. Yet y’all have been attacked your whole lives for liking twilight and can’t seem to make that connection. Once y’all get a little bit of recognition and power y’all wanna act exactly like the people that mistreated y’all to other innocent people that just want to be involved because they think you guys are cool. Y’all are so fucking backwards smh you people suck so fucking hard man.

Fuck the twilight fandom and fuck twilight. Y’all have ruined something I actually used to enjoy by being such nasty hypocritical turds about everything that isn’t white and popular and what you all like. You can’t be different or have different thoughts or unpopular opinions. Though y’all always say that you can, you can’t. The minute you even say anything about the Cullens that yall don’t like or the minute you ship anything that y’all don’t like, or have an opinion on a character or trope that y’all don’t like y’all get to shading and vague posting and mobbing up talking mad shit. You are all so damn fake and I hope and pray y’all get what’s coming to yall for being such nasty disgusting people and yes maybe I did come on a little too strong the first time and should have handled it better and spoken better and been more respectful but after being here for so many years and knowing y’all? That shit wouldn’t have worked. Y’all still would have reacted with viciousness and bullshit and miss the entire point. It’s what y’all constantly do. Look at what y’all do to people who politely ask for something you may not want to do??? If that’s how y’all react to innocent people then imma honestly pray for y’all. I repeat the same energy people give out and I repeated y’all nasty ass energy in my response and if you don’t like it you need to look at yourself and y’all need to stop pointing the fucking finger all the damn time. Grow the fuck up. Also if people really wanna insult me for writing PARAGRAPHS about shit YALL do? Not only is that the dumbest most useless fucking insult I’ve ever seen but it also reflects on y’all because of the simple fact that I have to write paragraphs calling out the shit y’all do and putting it in detail because y’all don’t know how to fucking read and comprehend shit, and YALL STILL MISSED MY POINT!!! That is... just wow. 🤦🏾‍♀️

Imagine being that dumb!

[arosesthorne-blog]

The Crew of the Bloodied Thorn (pt. 1)

“‘f y’think yer ready t’ take one, y���better be ready t’ take two-dozen more, sweetpea.”

Kina can’t crew the Bloodied Thorn alone - so she’s collected a rather bizarre menagerie of criminals, fugitives, swindlers, scumbags, lowlives, sailors, professionals, amateurs, and everything in between, to help her on her misadventures. These’ll come as installments, because I didn’t realize how long each description would be, but they were fun to write so I just kinda kept goin’.

Conner: Though Kinaali’s ego and control-freak tendencies have always prevented her from having a proper ‘first mate’, this intimidating mountain of a highlander has more-or-less filled the role as her bodyguard, right-hand man, disciplinarian, and just about every other role she can think of. A man of immense proportions, Conner stands a towering seven feet, with shoulders broad as a ship’s wheel, packed thick with iron-tough muscle. Signs of battle batter every inch of him - his bald head appears to have been nearly caved-in at least once, and he’s missing an eye - the empty socket of which he bears for the world to see. In spite of his immense size and role as the diminutive captain’s fiercest muscle, Conner is in all actuality more of a gentle giant. A mute, he seems one of the few of the Queen’s crew who genuinely tries to avoid fights if at all possible, communicating with subdued hand gestures.  Like much of the crew, he owes Kinaali his life. Having wound up on a prison ship (for something he refuses to ever speak.. err.. motion about,) Conner watched the vessel - crewed by a small detachment of the Limsan navy - fall victim to a prisoner revolt. He remained quiet and kept to himself during the commotion, primarily concerned with.. well, not dying. When a few of the vile thugs who’d taken over the ship decided to.. ‘take liberties’ with the female Limsan officer they’d captured, though.. Conner didn’t take too kindly to that. Before they managed to beat the giant into unconsciousness and dump him onto a beach to bleed to death, the ‘gentle’ giant had killed nearly two-dozen men. Plucking him off the beach, Kina saw him nursed back to health. Conner has subsequently grown deeply attached and has become incredibly protective of his captain; those with a track-record of upsetting her earn his ire. Threaten the Queen and you contend with her giant. And it isn’t a pretty sight.

Skully: One has to really wonder what good a man like Skully does to a pirate crew full of cutthroats, killers and criminals. He is, by any sensible reckoning, a man faaaar past his prime. A scrawny midlander generously described as a ‘bag of bones’, Skully’s ancient, leathery skin stretches across lanky limbs; his toothless, underbitten jaw flashes its stinking gums in glee far too often for one’s nasal comfort. Stringy patches of gray hair wreathe a skull darkened by decades spent under the sun, and his eyes - faded gray, one bisected by an aged scar, both clearly empty. Blind as a particularly geriatric bat, Skully’s sight isn’t the only sense he’s lost - common sense seems to be on that list, too. Gleefully oblivious, always brandishing a brimming, rotted smile on his face, Skully seems.. well, completely useless. To the uninitiated, that is. In spite of his numerous apparent deficiencies, Skully has a talent for navigation like no other. A life at sea, and the dulling of his sight, have given him an uncanny ability to find north; to sense the flow of the winds. The smell of the sea’s salt and the sound of the waves is enough for him to pinpoint exactly where along the shores of La Noscea the Thorn sits at any given time. ‘The hyuran compass’, Skully’s exacting skill at the ship’s wheel allows the Thorn to travel fast as blazes in any direction, and to any port, in all of Eorzea. To the old bag of bones, sailing comes as easy as breathing, and Kina wouldn’t trade him for fifty young, pretty and handsome, virile navigators. (Okay.. maaaybe, depending on how pretty and handsome we’re talking, here..)

Legs: In spite of his name, Legs actually isn’t very good with his legs. They are quite noticeably long, but a close inspection would also notice them to be atrophied from non-use, and they spend most of their time dangling from the rigging, swaying in the breeze. A black-skinned midlander with a messy head of knotted curls and a devious grin always borne on his face, Legs’s nickname may not have begun as ironic, but it sure seems that way now. Once a sailor press-ganged into the service of a viciously cruel pirate captain, he dared to lead a revolt against his former boss’s tyranny - and when it failed, he had his legs beaten, battered, and smashed into broken, bloodied pieces. They never healed properly (pirates aren’t exactly known for their medical or aetherial talents), and walking even short distances exhausted Legs through sheer, intense pain. While rotting away in the brig of his old master’s ship, Legs acclimated himself to a different sort of mobility - his arms. He spent months in that dungeon, strengthening his arms, until Kina plundered his tyrant-captain’s ship and rescued him from below-decks. Now, Legs uses his arms to climb the rigging - and he does it, faster than anyone. Not dismayed by his disability, Legs always has a grin to share and a cutting little remark to spare, spoken in a cheerily-accented pirate’s guffaw. As the Thorn’s lookout, he tugs himself bottom-to-top along the ship’s masts day in and day out, keeping the crew and its captain safe. He lives amid the tangled web of ropes strung along the Thorn’s sails, and with his peculiar method of travel, he can dart lightning-fast from the bow to the stern and anywhere in-between, like a spider skittering across its web.

Dahj: Dahj insists he’s always gotten a bad rap. I mean, aaaall he did, was kill his tribe’s nunh.. in his tent, with a knife in the back.. aaaand maybe three more men who came to the nunh’s defense.. but he deserved it, Dahj swears! The tribe was starving,with no leadership, no food, no future - Dahj was just doing what any self-respecting Seeker would do - saving his people. Unfortunately, the rest of the tribe didn’t see it that way. Dahj had a long history of jealous enmity towards his tribe’s nunh. In his youth, Dahj - an adventurous troublemaker - had stumbled into the city streets of Ul’dah. The tribe’s leaders saw it flicker in the young boy’s eyes now - envy. Dahj knew outsiders didn’t have to put up with this crap - ‘nunh’ this, social order that. Dahj thought he deserved to be the top dog.. er.. miqo’te. HE had the knowledge and the sexual virility to keep the tribe together. Anytime traders came from the city, Dahj stole anything he could, anything fashionable to city folk - he pierced his ears, wore elaborate Ul’dahn jewelry and fashion. He stole a pair of combat knives and began training himself in their use (his tribe greatly disdained the use of knives in combat). And finally, fed up with what he saw, he acted. While he professed to have his peoples’ best interests at heart, they.. well, didn’t agree, and Dahj barely escaped with his life. Fleeing to the city he had so long coveted, he found himself juuust scummy enough to enmesh quickly with the Ul’dahn criminal underworld. Perhaps permanently insecure about his size, Dahj has built himself into as much of a muscled, sandy-haired, tan-skinned powerhouse as he can manage. With a sunworn wardrobe of clothing that hasn’t been fashionable in Ul’dahn high-society for at least seven seasons, Dahj nonetheless considers himself to be a pinnacle of masculine achievement, dousing himself in ridiculous pomades and perfumes. Arrogant, dirty and dangerous, Dahj is not particularly well-liked among his fellow scalawags - though Kina keeps him around for his fighting skill, which is - all things considered - quite impressive.

Cast-iron: Kina, for good reason, seems attracted to the idea of surrounding herself with giant lugs - and the ship’s cook, Cast-iron, is no exception. A sea wolf broad as a boulder with skin of mossy-green, Cast-iron is.. well, we’ll say dim. He moves slow, he talks slow, he cooks slow; he doesn’t know much of the world beyond the kitchen and the sea, and he’s perfectly, utterly content with that. He leaves plotting and thinking to (intellectually) bigger men; he’ll worry himself with his duties in the mess. With arms marked by years’ worth of scalds and burns, Cast-iron is never seen without his baggy, stained chef’s whites, or the white apron crusted in flour, egg, and a mishmash of other kitchen debris. He rarely ventures out from his kitchen, save to pluck fresh ingredients from plundered vessels; when forced to fight, Cast-iron employs the implements with which he is most intimately familiar - kitchen knives, pots, and pans. One might be surprised at just how much damage a cook can do in his own oeuvre.

Crucius: The Bloodied Thorn is a haven for criminals and fugitives of all stripes, colors, creeds and characteristics - and Crucius exemplifies this perhaps more than anyone aboard. Tall, with long white-blonde hair, a strikingly-strong physique, a handsome face, a brilliant mind - one might wonder what, exactly, earned a man like this a spot among a pirate’s crew. Astute eyes would no doubt see his resemblance to Garlean leadership - and, indeed, Crucius carries Garlean blood in his veins. A promising young engineer and Garlemald native in years past, Crucius learned well from the bloody ambition exhibited by many of his colleagues; he pushed himself to the limit - and did anything he could to get ahead. A genius, he learned a half-dozen engineering and technical disciplines; he’d forged and constructed a ceruleum-powered four-cylinder engine from scratch by his mid-teens, and he’d mastered the smith’s hammer, the draftsman’s pen and the soldier’s blade by the early years of adulthood. Crucius had, however, learned the lessons of ambition drilled into him by his pureblood, disciplinarian father all too well - and where skill couldn’t get him ahead of his engineering corps superiors.. other methods would have to do. A charismatic and domineering presence, Crucius gained the loyalty of several of his colleagues, who embarked on a campaign of shadowy devastation intended to eliminate their rivals and elevate their own station. Deception, sabotage, blackmail and murder saw the sowing of chaos among the Garlean engineers as Crucius and his backroom allies rose rapidly through the corps. Ambitious men, unfortunately, often can’t be trusted - and when a routine skirmish in the outskirts of the Black Shroud went south due to Crucius and his group’s infighting, there was sure to be hell to pay. When one of Crucius’s men wound up captured, Crucius was certain the game was up - and all of his crimes would be exposed. He started walking, away from the Garlean camp and towards the sea. Eventually, he found Kina and her crew - and they sorely needed a shipwright, smith, and technical expert. Recognizing the follies his ambition had wrought, he accepted, content just to be alive - at least, for now.

mooore to come soon

[funface2]

The 50 best jokes from Edinburgh Fringe 2019's shows – and how to watch them all live – iNews

Culture

As the festival enters its final days, we round up the funniest gags on offer this year

Friday, 23rd August 2019, 09:28 am

Updated Friday, 6th September 2019, 16:32 pm

John Luke Roberts: I remember what my grandmother said to me on her deathbed. She said: ‘I wish I’d bought a normal bed.’ (Photo: Natasha Pszenicki)

I remember what my grandmother said to me on her deathbed. She said: ‘I wish I’d bought a normal bed.’ John Luke Roberts, Assembly Studio Two, 5.30pm

I went for my driving test the other day and the instructor said, ‘you’re in the wrong gear’. I said, ‘Why? What’s wrong with this tuxedo?’Nick Helm Pleasance Dome, 5.40pm; read i’s review of the show here

The best thing about being disabled is nobody ever wants you to babysit. In case you drop them. And recruit them. Rosie Jones, Pleasance Courtyard, 7pm

Do you reckon the band Chic ever found any takers for that free cow they were always trying to get rid of?Joz Norris, Heroes at the Hive, 4.40pm

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What do I want played at my funeral? Rugby.Goodbear, Pleasance Dome, 9.40pm

True crime documentaries are the only time the entertainment industry will take a chance on an unknown female lead. Jena Friedman, Assembly George Square Studios, 9.20pm

My teacher told me to make a vacuum – I thought, no pressure then.Leo Kearse Gilded Balloon, 9.15pm

Rosie Jones: ‘The best thing about being disabled is nobody ever wants you to babysit. In case you drop them. And recruit them’

In his job my dad’s never lost a case. That makes him Gatwick’s top baggage handler.Glenn Moore, Pleasance Courtyard, 4pm

I find it hard to believe Melania Trump had a body double for public appearances. It would definitely be for the private stuff. Laura Lexx, Gilded Balloon, 5.15pm

My mate came second in a Winston Churchill lookalike competition. He was close, but no cigar. Goose, Assembly George Square, 5.20pm

My mother doesn’t like the word vagina, so she calls it a ‘Lulu’ which was very confusing when I met my cousin Lulu, who coincidentally is a c***.Janine Harouni, Pleasance Courtyard, 5.45pm; read i’s review of the show here

Do I enjoy randomly appointing people to judicial positions? I’ll let you be the judge of that.Ivo Graham, Pleasance Courtyard, 7pm; read i’s review of the show here

I didn’t have sex at university for religious reasons. God hates me.Phil Wang Pleasance Courtyard, 8pm; read i’s review of the show here

Tiff Stevenson: ‘Jeremy Hunt has said he would lower abortion limit to 12 weeks. That’s funny because I’d raise it to whatever age Jeremy Hunt is’ (Photo: Steve Ullathorne)

My grandad died on April Fool’s Day. Every year for 10 years. Rhys James, Pleasance Courtyard, 6.30pm

I’m pleased to be getting a beer belly, I’ve always wanted a father figureCam Spence, Pleasance Courtyard, 4:30pm

I love Lorraine Kelly. I’m a big fan of her earlier work – the stuff she does before quarter to nine.Martha McBrier, Laughing Horse @ The Counting House, 7.15pm

Jeremy Hunt has said he would lower abortion limit to 12 weeks. That’s funny because I’d raise it to whatever age Jeremy Hunt is.Tiffany Stevenson, Monkey Barrel, 9.15pm

A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, ‘Yes, of course, that’s 20 cows’.Jake Lambert, Pleasance Courtyard, 8.15pm

My new boyfriend told me he’s got my face as his wallpaper, which I thought was cute until I saw his lounge.Steff Todd, Just the Tonic @ The Caves, 2pm

As a Russian, I admire Jeremy Corbyn – he’s tough. The KGB could interrogate him for a week and still not find out what his position on Brexit is.Konstantin Kisin, Gilded Ballon, 7pm

Ivo Graham’s sixth show at the Edinburgh Fringe is about becoming a dad

I fully support the school strikers on climate change. I’m just annoyed that they didn’t call it the minors’ strike.Matt Winning, Pleasance Courtyard, 4.25pm

When applying for a job as an estate agent, the interviewer worried that my CV was a bit small. I said ‘actually it’s really cosy’ and I was immediately hired.Alex Kealy, Just the Tonic at the Caves, 6.40pm 

Did you know the word ‘Ikea’ is actually made up of two Swedish words? “Ika”, meaning “Sunday”, and “Keya”, meaning “f***ing ruined.”The Scummy Mummies, Assembly Rooms, 7.50pm

I won Jewish comedian of the year, my mum was judging, then again, she always does.Joe Bor, Laughing Horse @ The Lockup, Cowgate, 3.45pm

Some people think being working class is a negative thing but I think there’s loads of benefits. I’ve claimed them all.Kelly Convey, Pleasance Courtyard, 7.15pm

I got invited to a gender reveal party – when you invite all your friends over to find out the gender of your child and release pink balloons if it’s a girl or blue balloons if it’s going to earn more.Robin Morgan, The Pear Tree, 4.05pm

They say some people ‘inhale books’. I know someone who injects books right into his veins. Particularly ones with female protagonists. He’s a heroine addict.Izzy Mant, Underbelly Bristo Square, 2.50pm

Adam Hess: ‘It must be annoying for clocks that from their perspective their hands are moving anti-clockwise’ (Photo: Matt Crockett)

I know that Banksy’s my dad, because I never see him.Flo & Joan, Assembly George Square Gardens, 6pm

I tell my friends I’m here for them 24/7 because it sounds better than saying I’m only here for them on the 24th of July.Andy Field, Just the Tonic, 2.10pm

It must be annoying for clocks that from their perspective their hands are moving anti-clockwise.Adam Hess, Pleasance Courtyard, 7.15pm

With enough revs and determination any restaurant is a drive-thru. Tom Taylor, Pleasance Courtyard, 6pm

My name is Sukh, which is short for Sukhjeet, which is Sanskrit for you’re never going to find it on a fucking keyring in a gift shop.Sukh Ojla, Gilded Balloon, 5:15pm

I haven’t looked up the definition of hyperbole in, like, forever.Caitlin Cook, Just the Tonic at the Grassmarket Centre, 5.50pm

British people are like coconuts. Hard on the outside but sweet once you crack us. Also often found full of alcohol and holding an umbrella.Milo McCabe, Underbelly, 5.30pm

Catherine Bohart: ‘I suppose lesbian sex is a bit like cricket, in that it goes on forever and there’s a lot of men watching it at home, alone, on the internet’

I’m making a TV series about the different parts of my gas cooker – I’ve already filmed the pilot.Olaf Falafel, Laughing Horse @ The Pear Tree, 2.50pm

I’m pretty sure Jesus is Gay because every time I go to God’s house he’s got pictures of him on the wall with 12 hot guys having brunch.James Barr, Underbelly, 5.20pm

I suppose lesbian sex is a bit like cricket, in that it goes on forever and there’s a lot of men watching it at home, alone, on the internet. Catherine Bohart, Pleasance Courtyard, 6pm

I look the wrong way when crossing the road, so people think I just got back from Paris.Joe Sutherland, Banshee Labyrinth, 10:10pm

My dad is like a black James Bond: it’d be great to see him, but he’s unlikely to make an appearance.Alexander Fox, Pleasance Courtyard, 6pm

In Poirot you meet six really posh people, and you know one of them is going to be murdered. In real life, you rarely get such good odds.Alasdair Beckett-King, Pleasance Dome, 6.50pm 

In my show we won’t be using things like a Ouija Board. Or if you don’t speak French – a Yesja board.SÉAYONCÉ, Assembly George Square, 10.20pm 

Ahir Shah: ‘The Arab Spring was 8 years ago. I thought “How long can a crisis conceivably last?”, and then I looked at my own personal life and was like “Yeah, that makes sense”’

My girlfriend and I are saving up for a mortgage, but it isn’t going very well – because sadly, all of our grandparents are still alive. Matt Richardson, Just the Tonic at The Tron, 9pm

Devon, the county of the UK where you put the cream on the scone before voting Leave.Ivo Graham, Pleasance Courtyard, 7pm

I was living in my office for a while, until it failed its MOT.Jim Campbell, Just the Tonic at the Caves, 5.20pm

Scotland heckled Boris Johnson so badly he had to leave by the back door, like one of his mistresses.Grace Campbell, Gilded Balloon, 3.15pm; read i’s review here

I like to watch Love Your Garden when I have my tea and then True Crime before bed. I feel really confident about being able to bury a body and know what to plant on top of it.Lucy Beaumont, Pleasance Courtyard, 4.45pm  

Me and my partner were going to go on holiday to Norway this year but we costed it up and in the end we couldn’t af-fjord it. Tom Parry, Pleasance Courtyard, 6pm

The Arab Spring was 8 years ago. I thought “How long can a crisis conceivably last?”, and then I looked at my own personal life and was like “Yeah, that makes sense.”Ahir Shah, Monkey Barrel, 1.45pm

Behind every successful man is me, trying to get his attention.Lou Sanders, Monkey Barrel, 3.15pm; read i’s review of the show here

I find it quite ironic that erectile dysfunction is on the rise.Rob Auton, Assembly George Square, 2.50pm 

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