#he grew up with the ghost crew who express love through teasing

[kanansdume]

It's so sad that Hera and Sabine got distilled down to their entire personalities basically being "snarky." Like Filoni took the fact that Hera and Sabine had senses of humor that could, yes, make them snarky in Rebels, and revolved their ENTIRE personalities around that in the Ahsoka show.

Like in Rebels, Hera is snarky sometimes, sure, but she's also one of the warmest and most nurturing personalities on the show as well as someone who DOES believe in systems (good faith systems like the Rebellion, not like the Empire obviously) and in respecting that the leadership set in place has good reasons for their rules and orders. Hera is the person who gets upset if the OTHER characters choose to just do whatever they want rather than follow orders. So yeah, she's snarky, but that doesn't mean she's someone who just does whatever she wants. It means she's someone who has a sense of humor.

And Sabine in Rebels is snarky, yes, but she has an entire arc where she goes from being a literal bratty teenager who has some issues with authority and blind loyalty to being a merciful, patient, compassionate, mature adult who respects the necessity of making decisions based on the greater good. She does still like explosives, yes, but her snark and her appreciation for a good explosive does not make up the entirety of her personality. She acts like a bit more of a bratty teenager at the beginning because she IS a teenager in the beginning, but she grows OUT of that by the end of the show and over the course of MULTIPLE different arcs per season. The fact that she's snarky doesn't mean she doesn't respect good strategy and tactics OR that she'd abandon a ceremony honoring someone she loves that she's been asked to speak at OR that she's someone who would make the selfish choice that literally undoes someone else's sacrifice. It just means she happens to have a sense of humor.

Snark is not a personality nor is it something you can base a character's personality AROUND. And yet that seems to be exactly what Filoni has done on the Ahsoka show. They're snarky characters so that means that they disrespect authority, do whatever they want, and act based purely on emotion. How interesting. How unique.

[mydearlybeloathed]

𝐆𝐎𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐒𝐏𝐈𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐀 𝐁𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐀

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: zoro doesn't dance, but he has no issue in watching you twirl yourself off your feet. so long as you twirl back to him when your feet get tired.

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: opla!zoro x fem!dancer!reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2k

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: use of Y/N, swearing, dancer!reader, fluff

𝐎𝐏 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

He was terrified, but not terrified enough to deny that you held his very life in your hands. Zoro didn’t mind that, not at all; you were gentle and funny and lovely and kinder than he deserved. Yet, you were real, as he often was reminded when you carded your hands through his hair with a little laugh and a mumbled, “Dumbass.”

No, Roronoa Zoro was terrified of how much he’d grown accustomed to your entire being.

It was also mildly frightening that you knew fully well just what he would do for you. Zoro admitted, he never tried very hard to hide it, not after your quiet little confession of affection some months ago, under the starlit sky, the wind brushing your hair away to reveal your face.

He’d been yours long before then, but only now he didn’t care to hide his adoring stares and relished in the little way you hooked your pinky with his when you were nervous. How your eyes searched him out when you entered a room. How your kisses grew from shy to ravenous as your relationship progressed.

It was safe to say he was certain you were as infatuated as he was, if not more, though that was a heated topic of debate between the pair of you (“There’s no way you love me more than I love you.” “Wanna bet?” “Zo, I literally took a bullet for you.” “Yeah, I’ve been meaning to bring that up… Why the fuck—!”)

A grin ghosted over Zoro’s face at the memory, and how you’d just laughed as he scolded your reckless affection. His grin grew to a smile before he could cool his expression, and then the warmth of your palm was cupping his jaw, drawing his face closer to yours. 

In the low light of the tavern, he swore you glowed. Or maybe it was the three shots of vodka in your system. Either way, you were an angel if Zoro ever knew one. An angel who blessed him with your touch and your teasing little smirk as you asked, “What’s got you smiling?”

“You,” he replied like a reflex. Leaning into your touch, he cast a look around the tavern, scoping out your other crewmates for signs of disturbance. Luffy and Usopp were at the bar, Nami was swindling a woman at the booth across from yours, and Sanji was charming up a brunette in the corner. None of the other patrons minded your crew, so Zoro allowed his shoulders to lose just a bit of their tension, and his hand drifted from his sword to your hand, tugging on it gently to urge you to sit beside him instead of across.

Giddy, you jumped up and hurried to his side, sliding in till your thigh was flush with his. Zoro’s body warmed as you leaned into him, not caring to ask as you took his arm and wrapped it around your shoulder, gazing up at him softly. Your comfortability filled him with confidence; how you moved with such familiarity in his presence, and how it contrasted from when you first met—it was enough to make his ribs crack just to have room for his rapidly expanding heart.

“Good answer,” you teased. You reached up to card your fingers through his hair, gently scratching at his scalp and smirking wider as he grunted and closed his eyes. “Tired?”

Zoro huffed a laugh. “No.” 

It was your turn to reminisce, watching as your swordsman melted before you, guard nowhere to be seen. Yours. Never would you have thought you’d actually get to call him that, but here you were, after all the odds and barriers of character.

You particularly enjoyed how he looked just now, eyes closed as you gazed up at him. Once upon a time, Zoro would whip around to make sure you never stood at his back, always ensuring you were nowhere near his blindspot. Now, you mused, he often slept with his back to your chest, your fingers trailing shivers up and down his arms. 

Now, his dead eyed gaze didn’t instill you with paralytic nerves; you knew he was more bark than bite, at least with you. 

Your dumbass.

“Oi, Y/N!” called Usopp, who had moved from the bar to the wide open space many used as a dance floor. The band of various instruments played a whimsical tune, the rhythm causing your knee to bounce in time.

You raised your brows. “Yep?”

Luffy wrung an arm around Usopp and laughed like a lunatic. “Come dance!”

Your eyes were droopy and honestly, you just wanted some sleep—but who were you to deny your captain? Besides, weren’t you the Strawhats’ resident deathly little dancer? 

Casting your boyfriend a look only to find him pursing his lips, you giggled and kissed his frown away, escaping the booth in his brief surprise.

Zoro watched as you leapt to your feet and practically floated with the grace in your steps. As much as Zoro trained and as hard as he tried, he’d never been as graceful with a sword as you were now. Somehow, that made him love you more.

A fiddle and drum, a flute and dulcimer—from what Zoro could tell with his limited knowledge, the music was exactly your style. A lively sort of sound. 

And as the music blossomed anew, Zoro spotted that tell tale sparkle in your eye; you had something up your sleeve, per usual, and as your toes started to tap against the ground he knew you’d be amazing, per usual. 

Luffy’s enthusiasm drew attention, and soon enough a crowd had formed.

You clapped your hands in a steady rhythm, twirling around in the middle of a circle of people, their gazes trapped by your every move. The crowd soon mimicked your clapping. From the front of the circle, Luffy and Usopp cheered louder than the rest.

Zoro leaned this way and that to keep his eyes locked on you, but it became increasingly difficult as you drew them near like moths to a dancing flame.

With an arabesque leading into a balancé, you glanced over your shoulder and caught Zoro’s eye through the people. His heart stuttered.

You laughed, pure joy in your lungs, and shifted your style from more classical to something looser. You twirled and curved your arms in an “S” shape before pointing your foot and scraping it in the dirt in a wide Rond de Jambe. The movement was swift and agile as you continued to follow the flow of the music, completely in your element. 

Mind elsewhere, Zoro hardly realized he’d stood up, not until he had forced his way through the crowd and stopped between Luffy and Usopp. The clapping all around him was deafening, only made worse by the sweet torture of your laugh. 

Again, your eyes locked him in place as you swept toward him, only to take Luffy by the hands and twirl him around with you. Zoro scoffed and folded his arms over his chest, unable as ever to hide the smirk tugging at his face. 

A giggle left you as Zoro’s face got lost in the whirl of your surroundings. You started a swing dance with Luffy, releasing him a second later to drag a newly approached Nami into the fun.

Your head spun and your feet ached—yet you would never feel happier than when you danced with your friends.

Well, you might’ve been a bit happier when dancing with your special green haired friend, but you knew him well. If you were to drag Zoro into the circle and dance him into the ground in front of all these people, he’d be compliant, but less than pleased.

No. When you danced with Zoro, it wasn’t like this; it was slow and steady, to the rhythm of nothing but the sea. It was deep in the belly of the Going Merry, when the crew was fast asleep, and the moon hung high. When you had the world to yourselves, and could sway in the hold of the other without interruption.

It was simple and plain, but it held a very special place in your heart.

Nami let you spin her around, rolling her eyes before she yelped as you pulled her in and dipped her low. She snorted into a laugh and stumbled a bit, grabbing your arms to keep you from whirling her around again.

Shooting her a wink as she all but ran back to the bar, you danced on light feet once more, starting up a roar of steady clapping. 

Your swordsman stood in awe, his eyes desperate to catch as much of your radiance as he could, like you'd disappear at any moment. He always believed good things never last, but he’d die before he let this one end. Because you were Zoro’s best thing, and he refused to grow a similar policy surrounding best things.

So when you had spun off your balance and teetered off your feet, he was there, his arms scooping under yours and catching you against his chest. Out of breath, you looked up and found his eyes, letting the rest of your weight lean into him as he stood a steady post. 

“Hey,” you giggled. 

“Hi.” Zoro tilted his head. “Ready?”

You were back on your own feet in an instant, thoughts of a warm bed more enticing than dancing through to dawn. So you took his hand and beelined through the crowd, shoving your way through and dragging Zoro along. You winded up collecting Nami by the door, and waited up for Sanji too. The navigator and chef yawned in time, their eyes droopy.

You were no better, your steps lazy as you mindlessly followed after Zoro and the others. It felt as if you’d blinked and you were back on the Merry, gazing up at Zoro who only nudged you with his shoulder. “You up?”

You grunted in reply and promptly led the way to your shared cabin, throwing open the door and letting go of his hand. You plopped into the blankets and at once felt yourself melt into them. The bed dipped a second later. Rolling over, you grinned up at your boyfriend, finding him with his brows met.

“Gonna take off your shoes?” he asked, though it sounded more like an order. 

“Yeah, yeah,” you huffed, lugging yourself back up to undo your laces and rip the offending apparel off. You turned to find him under the blanket, holding up one end to make you room, and you settled in beside him. Your head found its natural place on his chest, sleep just on the other side of the mental door, so to speak.

Lost in thought, you barely registered the words spilling from your lips. “I love you.”

It felt natural, like a breath you needed to survive. You wanted to say it again, then once more, and maybe again just for good measure. 

Zoro stiffened, his face going an embarrassing shade of red, and he was grateful you weren’t able to see it from your place tucked against his side. He barely even breathed, wondering how much time had really passed since you’d uttered those worldbreaking words. It must’ve been longer than a few minutes; you were fast asleep, none the wiser. 

He swallowed thickly and sank deeper into the bed, wrapping his arms tightly around you. He’d deal with figuring out how to say it back in the morning, and decide whether it’ll be the full truth some time later. Or, that was the plan anyhow.

Zoro really couldn’t hold back how you consumed his thoughts—his deathly dancer—and he could deny it all he wanted, but Roronoa Zoro had fallen in love, and apparently, you had as well.

The swordsman grinned, pressing a kiss to your hairline and forcing his eyes shut. How he got so lucky to have you love him, he had no clue. All he knew was you made his life a sweet kind of complicated, and he wouldn’t want you any other way.

[tobiosmilktea]

umpah umpah! smau

↪︎ bokuto x f!reader x iwaizumi

[033] — epilogue!

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a/n: this is definitely not my best writing cause my brain was going brr the entire time i was writing this, but i honestly can’t believed i have finished yet another smau! 🥳 ✨if i’m being completely honest this smau took a complete turn to what i was initially planning,, but it ended up not being that bad. i certainly feel like this smau would’ve been a lot better if i didn’t have school preoccupying me 24/7, but i’m still really proud of this. thank you guys for reading and dealing with this messy, messy smau!! ☺️

a year flew by faster than you had hoped. Two weeks turned into a month, a month turned into six, and six months turned into a year. A lot of things can happen within a year. Hell, a shit ton of things can happen within six months, yet here you were, all glammed up in your best dress at the move premiere of love cemetery.

you hadn’t felt this nervous in ages. the quickening of your pulse, the rapidly beating heart, to your pals that perspired as the seconds ticked on by. akaashi stood by you this whole time as your gaze keeps looking over to the guest list as if it were to magically change if you were too look away for one second. akaashi had been by your side, your moral support and the absolute backbone of your sanity the moment you and the team landed in los angeles a year ago. he noticed everything about you. he was one of your best friends, how could he not notice the way you were suddenly quiet and not excited right now?

he laid a careful hand on the small of your back to comfort you, leaning over to the same list of guests you were worrying about. “are you worried about who i invited again?”

“i’m more worried they’re not coming.” you confess without a single beat missed.

“oh, they will,” he assured you confidently. there was even a rising smirk in his expression when he let go of you, “have a little bit of faith in me will you? i was the one who got you back in touch with them.”

you huff playfully, rolling your eyes as you recalled the strange feeling of isolation over six months ago when you landed in la. it was in no doubt the longest flight of your life, lasting a good fifteen hours if you counted the two hour layover in hawaii due to reckless turbulence (it was one of the scariest flights in your life too). you had read their texts then, drowning in the sudden downpour of emotions when you read their words, i love you.

it almost didn’t seem real. you swore it had to have been the fatigue playing games on you as you couldn’t sleep for the life of you on the plane. yeah, maybe that was it, you excused. you were so desperate for their messages to be a figment of your imagination, you literally tried everything—turning your phone on and off, asking sugawara for eye droplets, and even ignored it until you were back on the plane and landed in los angeles. it had to be fake, please be fake. yet, in the back of your head you knew damn well it wasn’t.

there was a plaguing thought within you, one that’s so destructive and degenerative that you hated the fact you thought this way. but it wasn’t like you could help it. insecurity was a troublesome venom that coursed through your veins everyday and there didn’t seem to be an antidote to your own self-destruction. 

you loved them both, but you weren’t entirely sure if you had enough love to give for the both of them, let alone one. iwaizumi and bokuto’s feelings confused you to the core. you broke their hearts, yet how could they still love you so dearly?

you didn’t know the answer nor did you have time to even find it.

the film crew stayed in los angeles for two weeks and filmed over the course of that time period. days were filled with twelve hour shoots and a tight film schedule. being the author of the work itself, you were a major part of the production alongside the director. he trusted your vision and you’d often find yourself staying on set the entire day while kaori and the rest of the ddd team felt like they were on vacation. your only free time during that time was the ten minute holy grails in between takes that you were able to check social media.

you simply didn’t have the time to think about them. and yet they were like haunting ghosts that followed you relentlessly. every time you checked twitter or instagram, you would see every post, every tweet, every story. all of which would send your heart spiraling and tugging.

you missed them. but it wasn’t like you could do anything about it. you couldn’t possibly strike up conversation with any of them after completely ignoring their calls and texts for weeks. you had to have an odd amount of audacity to do that, and you simply didn’t have the guts to do so. if anything, the only lasting form of communication between you and the boys was the ringing notification that you liked each other’s posts.

it was quite the sad reality.

the film set then transferred to new york city, where the next two weeks would be filled with yet another plethora of twelve hour work days. fortunately for you, the rest of the ddd team were pulling a bit more of their weight, helping you on the creative side of things, yet still having the time to do all the fun touristy things whilst in the city.

you could remember the way your heart lit up seeing iwaizumi and bokuto’s names beneath who saw your story. it was a video of you and your team at the lady liberty statue. in it, kaori and yuko were chomping down on gigantic $2 street hot dogs, sugawara was yelling at semi for getting in the way of his film camera, while akaashi was complaining that the wind kept knocking down his green lady liberty hat.

it was strange thinking how fast things can change. within the first week, you were always up for an adventure in the city when the days were filled with work, but as the week progressed, your social meter decreased more and more. 

loneliness hit you then. it was a peculiar type of loneliness, the type that you felt alone despite being surrounded by your closest friends and working on your dream project. you figured you were just homesick the way everyone else was getting all ready for a night out going bar hopping while you sat in the living room of your hotel room in your pajamas.

“are you sure you don’t want to come with us, (y/n)?” kaori asked you, concern washing over her slightly as you flickered her a tired look. 

you shook your head, a small smile of gratitude melting upon your lips. “no, you guys go on ahead and have fun.”

your friends could only give you a look. they knew why you were being like this and they knew damn well it wasn’t homesickness. semi specifically threw you a look that’s meant to be teasing and oddly persuasive. “it’s been over a month, this can be a chance for you to finally meet someone new!” he exclaimed optimistically.

what was stopping you, anyway? it was clear nothing was, yet you still held yourself back. homesickness couldn’t possibly be to reason for it either. why are am i being like this?

“it’s okay, i’m with akaashi,” you decline once more, “he’ll keep me company.”

“alright then, join us once you feel like moving on.” says yuko with a hint of venom in her tone. you couldn’t blame her for saying that though as it was the harsh reality of it all.

your friends filed out the door, closing it in a thud and once again you felt alone. isolated as if you were in a void of your own silent thoughts that even the loud murmurs coming from the television wasn’t enough to drown out your shallow inhibitions. 

the night continued on like this for a few hours. eating snacks in the dark living room with the remote in your hand, flipping channels every five minutes as your running thoughts couldn’t keep your attention span still. it felt like you were missing something, a part of yourself that you couldn’t exactly pinpoint. you thought of all of the possibilities why you felt like there was a void in your heart, yet the only thing you could properly convince yourself on was that you just missed home. but was that really all that you had missed?

you thoughts are interrupted by steps approaching you. akaashi walks into the living room, flicking on the switches and causing you to grimace at the bright lights. your eyes stung slightly as they adjusted from being in the dark for too long.

“where are you going?” you ask akaashi as you noticed his dressed up attire.

“i got done with all the paperwork and emails,” he answers while he fixes the collar of his dress shirt, “i’m deciding to have some fun tonight with the rest of the group. are you still up for it? i’ll wait for you to get ready if you want.”

the thought occurred within you that you should agree. that the possibility of this unexplainable feeling of isolation you were feeling would disappear if you were to just say yes and go. but as self-destructive as you were on yourself, you continued to hold yourself back—hesitant and always second guessing your actions.

you open your mouth slightly, but you ultimately just shook your head no.

akaashi lets out a sigh. he was genuinely hoping you would come around sooner or later. granted, it had been over a month since you guys left japan and he figured you would be over everything by now, but that obviously wasn’t the case. “you might be receiving a call soon... i suggest you should answer it.”

confusion flushed over your expression, giving him a strange look. but before you could even utter a single question to him, akaashi was already up and out the door.

he left you in a wake of curiosity for the rest of the night. it was nearing one in the morning and you still hadn’t yet received a phone call. it honestly sounded incredibly ominous that you grew a tad bit nervous. there were only so many possibilities on who would call, but it would actually infuriate you if akaashi was just joking around. but then again, akaashi isn’t the type to play something childish like that unless it was kaori or semi’s idea. regardless, the thought kept you awake as you eyes practically weighed like cinder blocks at this point.

you couldn’t believe you wait for two hours for a phone call that might not even happ—it shocked you at first, the ringing of your obnoxious ring tone and the buzzing of the vibrations on the table.

furrowing your brows as you reached over, a gasp left you the moment you read the contact name. your slapped a hand over your mouth to muffle your shock. your hand shook from the growing bundle of nerves in your gut as you hesitate.

the name ‘kou’ shined brightly against your face, coaxing you to answer as if your thumb wasn’t frozen the accept button. out of all the possibilities on who would be calling you tonight, it just had to be him. it wasn’t like you opposed talking to bokuto. if anything, you had spent countless of sleepless nights wondering if you should finally answer that text of his. yet no matter how many different messages you have typed, none of them ever saw the light of day. a hurricane of stupid conversation starters and ice breakers swarmed in your head, all messy and disorganized that if you didn’t just suck it up and answered, you would’ve probably missed a chance to reconnect with him.

fuck it, you thought as you accepted the call.

“(y/n)!” bokuto called out to you, sending your heart running thousands of miles an hour. it had been ages since you heard your name come out of his mouth, “how’ve you been? a little birdy told me you needed a little company.”

you had to hold yourself back from smiling too much as you could already feel your cheeks ache. you wanted to scoff and perhaps groan at the sudden embarrassment of what akaashi could’ve told him. “bo—” you started, but is immediately cut off.

yet another familiar voice emitted from bokuto’s line, almost as if they were shouting, “you’re supposed to say that i’m here too, idiot!”

the volleyball player chuckles, “oh sorry, iwa-chan! here.” muffles and cups clanking against each other travel through to line to what you assume is bokuto handing his phone over to iwaizumi.

“uh... hi.” his voice sounded deeper than usual.

“hi iwa, how have you been?” you chuckle, finding his sudden shyness absolutely adorable.

“good, good. i’ve uhh... missed you.”

“i do too.”

“yeah, yeah, you miss me most though right?” bokuto’s loud voice thunders through the call.

the juxtaposition of how daftly different they were was something you could never get enough of. perhaps it was at that moment you finally understood your loneliness through their bickering. you were in fact homesick, but the home that you were thinking of wasn’t what you were missing the most. you suppose the home you missed was them. they were your home.

you let out an amused laugh, “right.”

“that’s good because iwaizumi and i should be mad at you for ghosting us for the past month, but we understand since akaashi explained to us already.”

your eyes suddenly widen into saucers, panicking what he could have possibly said. “what did he tell you?”

“everything,” bo sings.

you audibly groan in embarrassment, throwing your head back onto the couch in retaliation. you were glad they couldn’t see how flushed and red your cheeks were right now as they even extended out to the tips of your ears.

“you know it would’ve been easier to say that you love the both of us and didn’t want to choose right?” iwaizumi points out in between your panic.

“exactly!” cuts in bokuto, “besides we don’t sharing you, you know. who knew you were such a prude, (y/n).” you could practically hear the smirk in his voice as you couldn’t stop the heat from spreading any further from your face.

now you were really glad they weren’t able to see you at that moment. if they did, you would’ve died from the embarrassment then and there. “give me a break, i was too embarrassed to ask,” you mutter, fearing that they could hear how fast your heart was beating through the call.

“ask what?” iwaizumi teases, “ask if you could date the both of us?”

you were internally screaming at this point. everything that you didn’t think was going to happen, happened all within five minutes and you honestly couldn’t believe it. you were pinching yourself as if you were in a dream, yet no matter how hard you squeezed, this was actually happening. “shut up!” was all you could say.

“even if you did ask... it’s not like we could ever say no to you, (y/n).” says bokuto, his words so enticing that you weren’t sure if you’re heart can handle any more of this.

his words left you absolutely speechless. you honestly didn’t know what to say at this point.

"i’m fine with it and bokuto’s fine with it.” iwaizumi says, “it’s just a matter if you’re willing.” 

bokuto then leans forward towards his phone, “so what do you say, (y/n)?”

you swallowed the lump of nerves forming into your throat as the one question you never thought you would ever be asked was right in front of you. and yet you still hesitated despite everything that had just happened. you loved them both, so why weren’t you answering?

a few beats of silence passed before your gained the courage to push out the the very words, “... i’ll think about it.”

“boo! that’s lame!” bokuto shouts.

“i’ll give you guys an answer when i get back home.” you add, hoping to ease the disappointment they were probably feeling at that very moment.

“that won’t be for another few months, though.” iwaizumi deadpans that you could practically see the pout on both of their faces. “but we’ll promise to wait for you, (y/n).”

and so they waited for you to come back home, but you never did. schedules misaligned even when you were finally back home in tokyo. bokuto was getting progressively more busy now that the olympics were coming up and iwaizumi was just as busy, if not busier with the amount of athletes he had to take care of. there was even a constant flying back and forth from tokyo to los angeles for the film, all of which lasted for a few weeks at a time and you swear your couldn’t catch a break.

this went on for months with the only contact between you and the boys were from texting and phone calls that ended up shorter than you anticipated. and now a year had past since you left and this very movie premiere would be the first time you have seen iwaizumi and bokuto for the first time in a year.

this was so ironic how this all played out. you haven’t even realized you already reached the end of the red carpet when an interviewer calls out your name, microphone in hand and a camera pointed directly at your face.

“ms. (y/l/n)!” the woman shouts over the ruckus of snapping photos and other interviewers asking questions to the actors behind you. “there has been rumors going around about your dating life. are you dating msby’s bokuto koutarou or their athletic trainer iwaizumi hajime, who has been getting a lot of attention from stan twitter just recently! could you share some insight on your live life as love cemetery’s creator?”

“um,” you start, not sure how to answer the question as you nervous chuckled, “that’s a secret i’m afraid i can’t tell.”

before the woman could ask you any other questions, you walked away from the carpet and rushed towards the banquet hall. thankfully, akaashi and kaori was nearby and gratefully took your place in the interview without a second thought.

you let out a relieved sigh as much of the noise from the premiere died down as the only people inside the banquet hall were movie critics, the film crew, and other celebrities who were invited. by now, no one in this room would have the audacity to ask you such a personal question which caused weights to fall off your shoulder. you honestly should be used to those types of questions right now as a webtoon author that literally writes romance, but it always catches you off guard when you least expect it. honestly, you were just glad you didn’t slip up.

as a small little reward for yourself, you grab a flute of champagne from the refreshment table, decorated all fancy that you even hesitated to mess up the display. you turn around to face the growing crowd of mingling individuals, talking and laughing amongst each other as you sipped your drink gently. but as you watch you feel a presence on either side of you, both of which sent your heart soaring and a smile to appeared on your cherry colored lips. you didn’t even have to look them up and down to see how handsome they both looked. to think they were all yours.

“so what did you tell that interviewer?” bokuto asks nonchalantly as if he could just get away from a proper greeting. you were surprised he didn’t just engulfed you into his arms then and there.

instead, you opted to play along, “about what?” you tested with a smirk.

“the question about who you’re dating,” iwaizumi adds in from your other side.

you shrug, taking a sip of your champagne, “you guys probably wouldn’t like the answer i gave her.” you could feel the brazen stares bokuto and iwaizumi were giving each other—competitive and oddly provoking.

“she probably said she was dating me,” bokuto hums in response, confidence radiating off him that it caused you to scoff.

“i doubt it,” debates iwaizumi, giving him the same energy. “she probably said she was dating me.”

“actually,” you cut in before the two could possibly start bickering with each other, “i remember specifically saying that i’d thinking about it.” 

the boys give you a look, downing their drinks as if they were like the shots they swallowed many nights ago at that bar. it was as if they were trying to win your over again like your feelings had changed since then. 

“oh yeah?” bokuto starts, inching closer towards you while iwaizumi rested his arm on the table behind you.

“so what do you think, (y/n)?” says iwaizumi.

they both towered over you, just inches away from your body, but you didn’t cower or back away. if anything there was a playful smirk inevitably resting upon your lips.

now this, was going to be fun.

fun facts! —

sugawara has five rolls of film he had to get developed once they wrapped filming in osaka, each roll is from each city they went to for filming

iwaizumi and bokuto became really close friends when y/n left for la as they bonded over getting ghosted

bc of this,, bokuto posted a pic of him and iwa on his instagram and it got lots of attention that iwa went viral on stan twitter

taglist: (closed!)

@moonlightaangel @elianetsantana @k4tiepie @memorableminds @wheeshllumi @suhkusa @kitsunetea @airybby @noeminemi @truly-a-snitch @keichan @cosmicmermaid25 @bap-kingdom @saturnfarie @kwdflash @ennos-baby @dinablossom @chrisrue15 @seikamuzu @nestlevanilla @chasekudo @yammmers @pixcldust @iwaizluv @h0ngh0ngh0ng @emogrils @tiredandkindaoverworked @tsumue @underratedmage @bokutosuwus @kellesvt @unstableye @oh-tapeworm @scrappyfka @alittlebitofrain @mxngy @tpwkatsumu @atsumuwoah @macchiatoast @dicerawr @kageyamasbabygorl @some-random-stranger-007 @vhskenma @wntrmn @little-plants @stargirlara @kissungjae @je11yfishwriter @sbaepsae @apollochjld

[tae-cup]

Down With The Ship | FINALE

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Female!Reader

Summary: Captain Jeon Jungkook; a beautiful mess of blood and gold. His greatest treasure, may also be his greatest downfall.

Genre: Pirate!au

Warnings: Angst, some fluffy stuff, panic attacks, blood

Rating: T for Teens

A/N: Alexa, play Roslyn by Bon Iver and St. Vincent. aaaaaaand that’s a wrap! I’m honestly in love with this series and kind of want to make some spin offs, but I need to focus on like...my big series now XD 

Thanks for sticking around!

Word Count: 8k Words

Other: Masterlist

Previous 

Up with your turret Aren't we just terrified? Shale, screen your worry From what you won't ever find

           Him had a face. Him had a name. Eun-kyung haunted your dreams. The deep blue of his irises visited you at night and his soft hands touched your waist, your arms, and legs. The most innocent of touches giving you the fluttering of butterflies in your stomach. 

          You were broken out of your trance by a hand waving in front of your face. You blinked, startled. 

“Oh, sorry.” You murmured, brushing back a strand of hair as you met the gaze of the frowning captain. 

“Are you sick? Tired?” The genuine concern that tinged his voice was new to you. 

            You smiled softly and shook your head, turning back to sketching out the map before you. It was so nice above deck where you and Jungkook sat on the planks. He dictated anything interesting he saw and you sketched the coastline. 

“I’m alright, Jungk-Captain.” 

        He paused, looking at you for a moment. Then he turned back to observing the land mass ahead. “You can call me Jungkook. I don’t mind.” 

        His words made you smile a little and you didn’t know how his heart quickened when you smiled. 

“I see a large mountain in the distance. It seems to be of cold climate.” 

“That explains the wind.” You rubbed at the pinkened end of your nose. He noticed you shivering and, in an action that surprised both you and him, he shrugged off his coat and handed it to you. 

“Stay warm, Y/N. And head inside soon before you catch a cold.” He then wandered back below deck without another word. 

             You liked the way your name rolled off his tongue. His mouth moved around it harshly, like a command, while Eun-kyung always spoke it like a soft prayer on his lips. The callous nature of the man did not surprise you, he was a pirate after all and Eun-kyung had simply been your guard. But he was so much more than that. If Eun-kyung was the sturdy land, Jungkook was the crashing sea. And you had always loved the sea more than the land. 

              You stood at the side, biting your lip in concentration. The murky water below reminded you of the day you walked the plank almost a year ago. It had been terrifying and calming at the time, but now it just gave you fond memories. You still weren’t allowed off the boat since you were a wanted woman. The thought sent you back to the weight that had been hanging on your shoulders. Were they still looking for you? Was Haneul getting closer? Every day it felt like you could turn a corner and he would be right there. 

             You gripped the pen tighter as you traced the coast. The air was chill and your ears were freezing, but Jungkook’s coat was wrapped tightly around you, the sleeves rolled up to keep from dragging on the page. You hummed a little to yourself, just admiring the sights before you. 

             It was odd how the ocean, so vast and oppressive at times, could fill you with such joy. The emptiness of the sea, no soul within miles, would put a normal person on edge, but when you loved the salt in the air as much as the crew of BTS, the loneliness didn’t seem all that bad. 

               Jungkook was on his daily rounds to make sure people were on task. He checked in on Jin who was cooking lunch. The older man quickly shooed him out of the kitchen, waving a wooden spoon as the captain shouted his protests. 

           Then he visited Namjoon, his trusty second, but he was busy reading a book. When he had entered the man’s cabin, he had simply peered up at him unamused and went back to reading. Who knew the captain of his own ship could be so easily rejected by his crewmates? He didn’t even bother with Yoongi, fully knowing the man was asleep.

            Surely Jimin will need my help with something? So he went to visit the blonde haired man. But he was busy cleaning and claimed he didn’t need the help. Hoseok was quite obviously steering the ship and Jungkook didn’t really need to help there. So he ended up standing beside you, thoroughly tired of his crew. 

“It’s like every time I try to do something nice for my crewmates, the universe rejects me.” He sighed, feeling a little more melancholic than usual.

          It was nearing the anniversary of the mutiny and though the blood was long washed away, he didn’t really want to spend it on the boat. You made a noise of acknowledgement, still focused on your drawing. 

“Words would be nice, little miss.”

You rolled your eyes at the nickname, but smiled nonetheless. “Oh boo hoo. No one wants to babysit the captain.” You turned to face him, a smirk on your face. 

            His cheeks grew red and he opened and closed his mouth. He didn’t know if he wanted to kiss or slap that smirk off your mouth. Was it scary that the urge to kiss you was stronger? To him it was terrifying. He already had six weaknesses composed of his crewmates, but having a lover? That would be his downfall, he just knew it. So at what point did the pros outweigh the cons? He would see to it that they never did. For his and your own sake. 

             The captain still couldn’t help tracing his eyes over your profile. From the slope of your nose to the outline of your lips. Then he studied your hands, the way you held your pen, the way you focused on the paper. 

“How long are you going to stare at me, lover boy?” You teased, having grown comfortable with the captain.

             You spent most of your time with him to help him navigate and work on the various maps. It was sort of exhausting to have one way conversations with him, but you were okay with it; it was like home. 

“Sorry.” His response made you frown slightly, but you returned to your work. 

“Does Namjoon dislike me, or something?” You asked cautiously, not looking up from your sketch. 

“No...I think he just...has trouble trusting people.” Jungkook huffed, blowing a strand of hair out of his face. 

        The door that led below deck flung open with a crash and Taehyung stumbled out, looking out of sorts. He immediately went to the side and hurled out his lunch. 

“Taehyung, are you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost!” You dropped your pad and pencil onto the deck and ran over to look at him. He was pale and wide eyed. 

“Just a nightmare.” He choked out, squeezing his eyes shut.

            You caught the glistening in his eyes before he left to sit against the wooden siding of the ship. He leaned his head back, brown hair splaying out in all directions, and pulled his knees in close to his chest. The man took deep breaths. 

“Must have been one hell of a nightmare.” You murmured, your tone concerned, and you were. You had never seen the man so disoriented. He was often a wild card between serious and loving, but never had you seen him off guard. 

The man didn’t respond. His hands gripped his knees. The captain watched his crewmate in sympathy. With a sad expression, he tugged on your arm. 

“Y/N, we should leave him be. There are some things you don’t have to know about.” 

“His name was Sam.” Taehyung whispered. Jungkook stopped, glancing back at the gunner with curiosity. When he didn’t continue, Jungkook took that as his cue to leave. He dragged you away, disappearing below deck. 

           His mind was spinning. He went in circles, memories playing on repeat like a video. Taehyung could feel Sam’s warm breath on his neck, the way his hands held his, the way he brushed against him. The man would always claim it was an accident, but Taehyung knew it wasn’t. 

            While the lull of the sea usually brought him peace, today it reminded him of everything he’d done wrong. 

“Aish, you need to let it go already.” Sam sat next to him, his ethereal form hovering above the deck. 

“You died right in my arms, Sam. It was my fault for not shooting the man before he shot you.”

“You were processing, it’s okay.”

“Why did I hesitate the one time it mattered?” 

“Because you’re human.” 

         Taehyung bumped his head against the side several times, trying to make the ghostly spirit go away. It was taunting him with a love he could no longer have.

“How can you forgive me?”

“You did all you could.” 

“Why aren’t you mad?”

             The ghost stood and crouched in front of him, body passing through Taehyung’s knees. He could almost feel the man’s touch, his ghostly fingertips tracing his cheek. Then the wind blew and reminded him of the simple chill that caused it. 

“I could never be mad at you Taehyung.”

              The man swallowed, watching the specter lean in, his ghost lips brushing over his warm ones. 

“How can you say that, Sam?” He said weakly. “When you’re the one with a bullet in your chest.” 

 “If you weren’t a pirate, Hoseok, what would you be doing?” You sat on the railing that overlooked the main deck. Your legs swung back and forth. The pilot thought over your question, his eyes still set on the horizon. 

            Hoseok, despite his sunny personality, could look rather serious, possibly angry, when he thought hard enough. He twisted the wheel, sending the boat closer to the mainland. 

“I think I would be a dancer.” 

“You dance?”

“I wanted to.” He corrected you. Then he released a sigh and placed a pole through one the rungs to hold the steering wheel while he took a break. “It wouldn’t have worked out. It wouldn’t have been a living.” 

“Can you show me?” You asked. He raised an eyebrow. 

“You want to see?” There was hope in his eyes as he spoke, his words holding an excitement. 

“Yeah, for sure!” You smiled widely, eager to see your crewmate either wow you or make you laugh. 

“Alright! But you’re getting in on it too, okay?” 

“That wasn’t the deal.” You crossed your arms. “Besides, I only know some ballroom dancing.”

“I’ll show you!” He exclaimed excitedly, taking your hand and leading you out to the main deck. 

           He bowed lowly, pecking your hand with his lips. You instantly flushed bright red and he looked up at you with a sly smile. 

“May I have this dance?” He asked.

“Most certainly, kind sir.” You played along, curtsying. 

            He chuckled and took your arm in his so you were facing opposite directions. Then he began skipping around in a circle, humming out a beat and melody. You laughed, forced to follow along with his antics. He then switched arms and continued the dance. Then he unhooked his arm, spinning you around in a circle. 

          You fought to regain your balance, the world spinning as you let out more squeals of excitement. He then held up his arm, intertwining his arm with yours. Your hands touched, fingers pointing upwards as he took a step forward, leading you in the new dance move. You both laughed in delight, dancing to the rhythm of the sea and humming a tune only you two knew. 

           There was a loud cough. The entire crew stood there, even Yoongi, watching you with varying expressions. Jimin looked eagerly between the two of you. Yoongi just sighed, but he didn’t move back below deck as he usually would. Jin was holding back a laugh and even Namjoon let his lips twitch into a smile. Jungkook looked the least pleased. 

“Hoseok, don’t you have a job to do?” The captain barked. 

“Sorry, captain.” Hoseok bowed and started leaving. You quickly grasped his arm, pulling him back. 

“Stop it, Jungkook.” You hissed, not bothering with the title. “You’re always trying to ruin the fun, loosen up and live a little.” 

           The crew stood still, glancing between the two of you. Jungkook turned on his heel, letting out a huff of air, his nostrils flaring. The rest of the crew awkwardly shuffled from foot to foot. 

“Jimin! Get over here, I can see you want to get in on it.” You winked, moving around to push the male towards Hoseok. 

         The older man easily took the younger in and started showing him the steps. You then shoved Namjoon and Jin together. Yoongi glanced at Taehyung who smirked. 

“No way.” Yoongi scoffed, ready to go back down below. 

          The others were already getting into the swing of things, switching partners and letting playful banter slip in between the melody they all started singing. 

“As I was a-walking down Paradise Street.” Jin sang, his voice clean without a warble. 

“To me way-aye, blow the man down.” The others chorused.

“A pretty young damsel I chanced for to meet.” Jimin rang out next, his voice like a bell and just as beautiful. 

“Give me some time to blow the man down!” They all sang back, erupting into laughter. 

         Taehyung reached out and grasped the older man’s sleeve. 

“Yoongi, I think it’s about time you joined the world of the living.” He stated firmly and dragged him out to dance with the others.

           It was soon a mess of laughter and drunken singing, although no one was drunk; they acted like it pretty well. Hoseok was clapping in time to the beat. You wanted to throw yourself into the mix, but you didn’t have a partner. The most eligible man was pissed off below deck, most likely brooding. 

           You wouldn’t have it. You marched down below, despite how much you hated the claustrophobic feeling of being below deck. You pounded on the captain’s office door and he responded with a stern come in. 

           You marched inside. 

“Captain Jeon Jungkook if you don’t go out there and dance right now, I’m going to drag you out. You can spend all your life hiding from your crew and holding up in your office when everyone is bonding. And you also need to stop brooding like some edgy man baby! Seriously! Loosen up!” You paced, ranting to the captain who sat looking amused at you. His arms were crossed and his eyebrows shot up at the words ‘man baby’. 

“Excuse me, is that anyway to speak to your captain?” He frowned, effectively cutting you off. “Maybe I have been too lenient with you and the crew.” 

           Then he caught himself in the mirror and sagged, suddenly lost in thought. That was something Captain Rogers would say. Except, when he looked at you, you weren’t shaking and crying, you weren’t flinching at his gaze. Instead, you stood straighter. 

“You need to be more lenient to yourself, Jungkook.” You stepped around the desk and he swiveled his chair around to face you. 

           Jungkook had such a youthful face, it was a shame he spoiled it so often with frowns. You could almost see the stress wrinkles already forming. You reached forward, harmlessly brushing your hands with his. He pulled his hand away like you’d burned him. 

“Is everything...is everything alright Jungkook?” You asked quietly. 

          He couldn’t think. The world was spinning. Being in that office, being touched, watching himself in the mirror, it was already painful enough. When he looked at you, it wasn’t you that stared back, he only saw Captain Rogers. His breaths came out hurried and short. 

“Look, I’m sorry if I’m pushing you to do something you don’t want to do, but going outside your comfort zone is good sometimes, okay?” You reached out once again and firmly held his hand in yours. 

           The brush of skin on skin made him nauseous. Your grip was suffocating. He felt like he was drowning. The room felt stuffy, his breaths came shorter and shorter. His eyes wildly gazed around your face, begging to see you and not Captain Rogers. But he only saw the old man’s yellowed grin staring back at him, his lips spewing your words. The anger was back, a simmering pot of rage. 

“Don’t touch me.” He said softly. 

“What?” You tilted your head, trying to understand what was happening. 

“I said don’t touch me!” He ripped his hand away and stood, staggering back a couple of steps. “You don’t know anything about me!” He barked. 

          His hands trembled and he held his stomach, trying to hold onto its contents. The ghost touches were still there, making him bend over as he tried his best to keep down his lunch. 

“Get out!” He shouted. Then his voice went quiet as he trembled. “Just get out.” 

         He pointed weakly towards the door and you simply nodded and left, as much as you wanted to help him. 

         He crumpled to the floor, taking in deep breaths as he ran his hands over his arms. I am in control. I am in control now. It was a soft chant in his head as he sat in his little office; his cage. 

             You couldn’t sleep. The memory of Jungkook tainted your mind. Your heart had been racing since you left his office. He hadn’t arrived for dinner, but Jin delivered it to his office. He didn’t say his usual goodnights to the rest of the crew and so the day ended bitterly. Everyone knew something was wrong with the captain and you didn’t want to pry, but you knew it had something to do with what happened today. 

              The utter terror he had stared at you with had made your heart drop instantly. The way he flinched when you touched him sent you tumbling into a spiral of self doubt. What mattered was no longer how he made you feel, but how you had made him feel. Was he okay? Did he eat his dinner?

               You took a deep breath. With both Eun-kyung and Jungkook haunting your sleep, you could no longer rest. You stood and made your way out to the main deck. There was no wind tonight. The air was still and the ocean eerily calm. The stars twinkled brightly like a blanket of holes in the dark night. The moon was a perfect circle, providing ample light. You leaned against the side. The waves lapped playfully against the wood of the ship. There was a gentle breeze that blew through your hair every so often. 

              Your nightgown wasn’t the warmest thing to wear, but you didn’t plan on being out for long. It was so quiet your ears rang. There wasn’t a single soul for miles and miles. The peace was nice. 

“Can’t sleep?’ The familiar rumble of the captain’s voice met you in the silence. \

              His soft steps made their way to stand beside you. He leaned against the railing. Your heart thumped. You shook your head in response to his question. Jungkook let out a soft sigh. 

“Yeah, me neither.” He agreed, eyes trained on the dark sea below. 

              You shifted awkwardly, making sure to keep your distance. You turned to him, admiring the way the shadows fell on his face in the moonlight. 

“Look, I’m sorry about earlier, I didn’t know what was happening and I pushed you. It was wrong. I’m really really sorry.” You said earnestly, hands clenched. He inhaled sharply, shutting his eyes and nodding. 

“I know. It wasn’t your fault. You couldn’t have known. I’m not a very open person.” He confessed. “It was just...something that happened in the past.” 

          You didn’t want to pry so you nodded and left it at that. He scooted closer to you. You took a step back. He snorted. 

“I’m not fragile. I just had a moment there.” The captain said, but his tone was a little saddened. 

            You fell silent. He shifted toward you and you didn’t move a muscle. 

“Y/N?” 

“Hm?” Your hair was ruffled by the wind again. He was mesmerized by your beauty. Pros and cons be damned. 

“You make me feel...things I didn’t think were possible.” He admitted. “I think I like you...a lot, but I was never taught love or really kindness at all growing up. So I would probably never be able to love you the way you want because I just don’t know how but-”

“Wait, you...like me?” You froze, eyes widening at the captain. 

          He looked more like a stuttering school boy, clearly having never matured much in the love department. You let a smile break out on your face at his almost nonexistent nod. You resisted the urge to grab his hands. 

“Good, because I like you too.” You confessed, your face heating up. He grinned, then tentatively reached for your hands. 

“I want to learn. I want to try, but you’ll have to be patient with me, Y/N.” He explained cautiously.

          Then he carefully took your hands in his, ignoring the way his skin crawled at the contact. Your wrists. Wrists that had never had a bruise on them. His wrists. Wrists that were a permanent shade of purple and blue. He could try. For you he could try. 

           You returned to your room that night, your heart thumping wildly. The simplest of touches, holding hands, had sent your heart soaring. Your mind was running wild with the picture. That night, you dug the gold wedding ring out of your bag. You held it up to the moonlight, watching it shine and glint of the metal. Then you unlatched the cabin window, letting the cool air infiltrate your room. 

           You stuck your hand out and let go, watching as the golden ring that acted as your chain went tumbling all the way down into the water. It’s impact was a mere ripple in the dark waters. 

            It had been months since you set foot on land. You hadn’t missed it, not really. The swaying of the ship you had become accustomed to and as long as you had your crew, you were happy anywhere. 

          The dashing captain set foot next to you and you released a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Being off the ship gave you a sense of dread. The shackles of social norms and manners were shackles to weigh on you. 

“Hey, you’ll be okay.” Jungkook said calmly and you took that as a sign you should move. The other members accompanying you were Yoongi and Jin. 

           You were paranoid and that was only made a little better by Jungkook being there. You browsed the shops, full well knowing Jungkook could buy the whole town with his money and still have enough left over to last a lifetime. You picked up a necklace, the silver chain was made of delicate links. There was a yellow amulet attached.

         Jungkook leaned over you, his skin still never touching yours. He had revealed very little about his past and even then it was rather cryptic. All you could do was assure him that whatever happened when he was growing up was wrong. From the scars on his back and arms, you could piece together a little bit of his story at least. And it wasn’t a story you wanted to read. 

           Jungkook fingered the jewel for a moment, turning it over in his hands. He then held it up to the sunlight and sucked in a breath. It’s genuine. He thought to himself. Then he handed it back over to you. 

“You should get it.” He said quietly, his breath hot against your ear. “It suits you.” 

             Heat crawled up your neck and he smirked as you paid for the necklace without a second thought. The feeling of being watched didn’t disappear as you continued shopping. 

“Y/N?” An all too familiar voice called. It caught you off guard, your breath hitching. 

             You had always thought Haneul had a similar voice to Eun-kyung. The resemblance was uncanny as your supposed fiance appeared. Jungkook immediately stood on guard, hand moving to his waistband where his gun was holstered. Haneul was not a bad guy. He was stuck in a similar predicament as you. 

“Y/N, I can’t believe it’s you.” The man breathed. “Everyone thinks you died!”

“Good!” You spat, standing firmly next to Jungkook. The crowd had yet to notice the scuffle breaking out. “So where’s your back up, huh?” 

“I don’t have any. I seriously didn’t expect you to be here.” Haneul held up his hands as a sign of mercy. 

          Jungkook didn’t loosen. It was like something bad always happened to you when you went on land. It was a little exhausting at this point. 

“Please, you and I both didn’t want this, but if I don’t bring you back and marry you, I’m going to be disowned. My parents can’t have a bachelor son who couldn’t even keep track of his fiance in their image.” 

           You almost felt bad for him. You had both been forced into the situation and while you fled and started a new life, he was forced to bear the brunt of your actions. And for that I’m sorry. You thought, but you didn’t have the decency to voice your thoughts. 

“There’s no way she’s going to marry you.” Jungkook’s eyes were wild. 

            He began playing the part of the maddened captain everyone saw him as. And you saw it too, just for a moment. Was there any way out of this predicament without violence? Surely Haneul would not let you simply walk away. He had been waiting a little over a year to find you and keep his head from being disowned. There was no way he was about to let you go. 

“If she doesn’t, It’ll cause a massive uproar in the houses!”

“Good.” Jungkook spat. 

            You knew how chaotic that would be. While you were technically a pirate who cause chaos all the time, you were not a crew who did so ‘just because’. This just didn’t have a good reason. Besides, the noble houses were still a part of the hierarchy of society. What would happen if they were thrown into such unrest? 

“You still have a search warrant out for you, Y/N. The prices have been upping since your departure.” Haneul spoke. You frowned in response. “It’s at 500,000 gold shillings. That’s enough to last a man most of his lifetime in comfort.” 

“Yes, I know how many shillings that is.” You said bitterly. 

            You thought over your options. Running was out of the question. There were two of you and one of him. Your disadvantage would be running through the crowd and Haneul was always a fast runner. The second option was to stay and talk to him, but that gave him ample time to call for backup. The third option...was not one that would please Jungkook, but it was also the best way to get Haneul to stand down. 

What can ya say? If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. 

         Jungkook was reaching his breaking point. Your lightest touches were reversing years of mental and physical torture. While he’d never be whole ever again, you filled the space well enough. You were humming softly to yourself, a tune only you knew, as you filled in the key for the newest map. 

          “Y/N?” He called, watching you look up. Your eyes were curious as you stared at him. He felt his breath hitch at the way your hair fell perfectly around your face. 

           “What is it, Jungkook?” You asked. 

           “Thank you.” He said. 

           You tilted your head, eyebrows knitting together in the cutest expression. You set your pen down and reached out, brushing a strand of hair behind his ear. You made sure not to brush your hand against his cheek. 

            “For what?” 

            “Everything.” He said vaguely, years of practiced poise coming in between him speaking earnestly with you. 

             “Are you alright?” You stared intently into his eyes. You placed your hand on his forehead without thinking to check his temperature. Yet, his skin didn’t crawl at your contact. His forehead was warm, but normal, which meant he wasn’t sick. 

              Jungkook had a dam. It was a high wall and it built itself higher every time he held back his emotions. Behind was a swirling tide of tears and pain waiting to be released. The waters swelled once more. He bit his lip and started building the wall higher. His doe eyes widened as he tried to keep the tears at bay. When he looked into your eyes, you seemed to genuinely wonder if he was okay. When was he ever okay? 

             He inhaled shakily. 

            “Do you really want to know?” 

             “Yes.” You said without hesitation, shoving the papers in front of you to the side. The ink rolled onto the floor. He laced his fingers together, knees bouncing as he pondered what to say. 

              “Okay.” He released a breath. “I need to start at the beginning.” 

-

               When his story was told through and through, no detail spared no matter how gruesome, he finally met your gaze. In your eyes were...tears. You looked devastated and as much as you wanted to reach out and hold him, you knew how much he disliked skin on skin. 

                “What they did to you was wrong, Jungkook.” You said firmly, though your voice shook at the very last word. He closed his eyes, leaning back in his chair. 

               “I’ve been trying to convince myself of that since I was 18. But it’s easier said than done.” He felt the dam breaking. The wall was old, cracks letting out small streams of water. 

              “We can help you. We’ll be with you every step of the way.” You cleared your throat. “I will be with you every step of the way.” 

             The captain felt like a small child under your warm gaze. He was once again a vulnerable boy, one who couldn’t understand the evils befalling him. He threw his hands over his face, scooting his chair back and curling over in his lap. His head hit his thighs to avoid your eyes. The dam broke. 

          Haneul was tired. Tired and angry. A year of berating, pitied looks, and whispers behind his back had let the rage build up. He let it brew, blaming it all on you. You were the reason he was being disowned. You were selfish. You put him through this. Yet, he sat next to you, a bowl of soup in front of him and an anxious crew watching. 

           He carefully picked it up, examining the contents. Broth. Carrots. What else was in there? It couldn’t be too bad. You watched him with a smile, knowing he was probably going through the same thought process as you had.

“And there’s nothing else in this?” He said skeptically. 

“Just carrots and soup!” Jin defended. You snickered behind your hand. Jin turned and slapped your arm. “It is!” 

“If that’s just carrots and soup, then I’m just a brain on wheels.” You chuckled. 

“Seriously!” Jin shouted. Haneul sighed and took a sip. 

           He swallowed. The crew held their breaths. Then he went and took another bite. You gaped. 

“Oh it’s not too bad, Jin!” Haneul smiled, but his ears were growing red. “It had a little, achem, kick.” 

Jin puffed out his chest and crossed his arms. “See! You all underestimate me. Or maybe…”

“Don’t say it.” Yoongi groaned. 

“I’m just saying you might just be wusses and Haneul here can actually stomach it because he has the balls.” Jin clapped the young man on his back. 

The captain sputtered at that. “Excuse me?” 

“You heard me.” The older man pointed at the captain. “You don’t have the balls to drink the soup, all of you. You just complain.” 

“I bet I can drink more than you!” Taehyung pointed at Yoongi. The pale man’s face dropped, his expression of neutral impassivity. 

“You’re going to lose that bet.” 

         Haneul watched the crew, still trying to get out of his habits as a nobleman. He needed to blend in, get you to trust him. He cleared his throat, which was still burning. 

“I’m going to get a bit of fresh air.” He declared, his body still sore from spending a night in the jail. You nodded at him and he hated the happy look on your face. 

           Why did you get to be happy when he was miserable? Weren’t you the one who ran away from the problem? He glanced at your ring finger, but there was no glint of gold. The captain had several rings and earrings, but nothing on his ring finger. You and the captain were speaking quietly to each other. Haneul saw the captain smile when he spoke with you. 

          He dropped the message off the ship and prayed the tide would take it where it needed to go. Then he breathed in the sea air. He hated the ocean, always preferred land. He heard footsteps and knew it was you. You stood there, observing him for a moment. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Missing home.” 

            You narrowed your eyes. He had yet to walk the plank, he wasn’t a true crew member yet and you were allowed your reservations. You remembered Jungkook’s words. We all hold a deep love for the sea. Yet, here Haneul was moaning about home. It only helped to set in more of your suspicions. 

“I get that.” You said quietly. You took a place next to him. 

“I don’t understand the universe, Y/N.” He started slowly. You faced him, confusion written on your face, but he didn’t turn to face you. “You’re so happy, so free. You get to do the things you’ve always wanted to do while I’m still constrained.” 

“I followed what I wanted to do. If you don’t want to live a life at sea, then we should drop you off at the nearest village and you can be on your way.” You said softly. 

“You don’t understand! Y/N! You ran away from your problems! Why do I have to be punished for your mistakes?” He trembled with rage, the powerful emotion pulling at him from all edges and bursting at the seams. 

“I’m sorry, Haneul.” you said, seeing how he truly felt. The anger that was dripping off of him like honey had a bittersweet taste. “I’m doing what I love and you should too.”

“I can’t be a nobleman if I’m disowned. There’s not a suitable girl within the houses for another five years.” He bit his lip and looked to the night sky. “Which is why I need to bring you back.” 

          You took a step away from him, itching to go back below deck. 

“You can’t be serious, Haneul?”

“You had your little adventure, you got to be a pirate, yay. Now let’s go back and maybe we can salvage your reputation.” 

“Reputation?” You sputtered. “This has nothing to do with that. I’m never going to go back with you.” You said furiously. “We’ll be dropping you off at the nearest village first thing.”

        He turned to look at you finally. A haunting look was in his eyes. 

“And how far away is the nearest village?”

“A day and night away.” 

“And you really think our parents wouldn’t have sent a ship with both of us missing?” He chuckled darkly. You backed away. 

“What did you do? Haneul what did you do?” You screeched, racing away as he laughed. You flung open the door to the lower deck where the crew was still eating happily. 

           They all stopped talking, taking in your ragged form. Immediately, Jungkook stood and went to you. He didn’t touch you, but he had concern written on his face. His gaze was steely, but you didn’t cower. 

“What’s wrong, love?” He asked, his voice hoarse. 

“Where’s Haneul?” Jimin piped up. 

“He tricked us.” You took a deep breath and met your lover’s gaze. “Haneul tricked us.” 

         Taehyung yawned, his guns resting on his lap. The ghost of Sam hovered nearby. 

“You should get some sleep.” He chided. 

“I know, Sam.” Taehyung grumbled. “But I have night watch and I won’t let my crew down.” 

“Will a ship really attack? I think Haneul may have been bluffing.” Taehyung could almost feel his breath. The gunner shook his head. 

“No can do.” He replied, fiddling with his guns. 

“Then let me rest, Tae, so I don’t have to watch you do this to yourself.” The ghost pleaded. Taehyung smiled a little.

“Nope. You’re staying right here, Sam.” He murmured. The man watched the horizon. No one was in sight for miles. Maybe he would just shut his eyes for one minute. 

        One minute too late. 

        The sound of hushed voices woke him up. He knew those voices were not his crew’s. Then his eyes traveled to the brooding black ship sidled up next to them. Taehyung flung himself up, lurching towards his guns. Sam was gone. How many crews were going to be slaughtered on his watch? His heart quickened. Taehyung didn’t have time to feel the guilt of this information, he needed to act. 

          The gunner opened the door to the lower deck and quietly shut it behind him. Then he raced to the captain’s office. 

“Come in.”

“Captain, they’re here. They’re on the upper decks, we need to attack while we still can.” Taehyung said breathlessly. Jungkook’s eyes widened. 

“How did they board? Nevermind, what matters is that they’re on the ship already.” He stood and opened his drawer that had a gun in it. Then he flung open his office door. “Gather the men. We’re going to battle.” 

-

          BTS had never really been in a battle. They often had the upper hand in a situation and crews went down without a fight. But it was at this moment that you remembered that everyone in the crew could hold their own.

          Yoongi held a harpoon and he was tangoing with an invader. Their figures were mere shadows in the moonlight. You had taken a knife from the kitchen, but you didn’t want to attack in case they were your men. The only sounds were the rhythmic pounding of the sea and the grunts of the men wrestling on the deck. 

           There were a few cracks of light as gunpowder fizzed in the air and stung your nose. It was like an awful hellscape. You stepped in a liquid and prayed it was water and not a puddle of blood. Lifting up your foot to examine, your fears were confirmed. 

            You sidestepped a body that was flung off the side. You knew the man to be an enemy because Jin’s face lit up in the moonlight in front of you. He was breathing heavily, a dried streak of rusty blood down his face. 

“Y/N, get the rowboat ready. We need to leave, they’ve brought too many men and we’re only seven.” He shouted over the commotion. 

         The crack and pop of several guns went off at once, lighting the sky up with gray smoke. 

            Hoseok ran over, looking a little worse for wear. He had a bruise forming on his cheek and a painful gash on his arm. 

“We’ve got to go, now.” He grasped your arm, trying to pull you away.

            His face was serious, angry, pained. All emotions you never expected to attribute to the man. Jungkook. You turned to watch the figures. You recognized Jimin’s blonde hair. 

“Jimin!” You shouted as an enemy approached him with a knife.

          Jimin turned, the sweet boy looking at you with wide eyes. The cabin boy was never meant for battle. 

            A guttural scream of rage came from the side and the hiss of a gun going off lit up the deck. Taehyung’s face was illuminated, thoroughly pissed. He refused to hesitate again. He wouldn’t let another crew member die on his watch. He shot at the would be attacker, but you assumed it must have been adrenaline making his hand shaky. 

           He missed. In all your time on the ship, Kim Taehyung had never missed a shot. Everything was working against you. Taehyung jumped in front of Jimin, resulting in him getting punched in the nose, blood instantly spurting.

            You tore your grasp away from Hoseok. 

“Y/N, stop!”

“Hobi! The crew needs me!” You shouted, racing towards Jimin. 

        You pulled Taehyung up and grabbed Jimin’s arm as Jungkook shot the enemy dead. 

“Tae, get up, Jimin, help him.” You wrapped a dazed Taehyung’s arm around Jimin’s shoulder. 

          The cabin boy nodded at you and you could see the steel behind his eyes. The timid boy was anything but timid. Jungkook ran towards you. 

“Y/N, you need to get off the ship. The others are already going to the rowboat.” He said, his voice hurried and his eyes wide. 

         Your eyes trailed to six familiar shapes climbing into the rowboat. 

“But someone needs to stay behind to release it.” You said quietly. Jungkook nodded.

“I know.” 

“You can’t really be suggesting yourself, you self-sacrificing bastard?!” You shouted, feeling tears pricking at your eyes. His face was sculpted perfectly in the moonlight, a white spotlight beaming down just for him. 

“Please, Y/N, I don’t have any other choice. A captain always goes down with the ship.” 

“No.” You stood firmly, tired of being pushed around finally. You inhaled sharply. “I have nothing to return to. I won’t let you do this alone.” 

“Y/N…I love you�� He sighed and then, out of character, he drew you into a hug. Your breath hitched. His skin didn’t crawl at the touch. “Please don’t do this.” He whispered.

“I love you too, Jungkook, but-” You started, rubbing his back. You looked over his shoulder. “Jungkook!” You screeched. The man tensed in your hold, turning around just in time to see the figure coming towards him. 

         Everything slowed. 

         The captain pushed you away, and faced the man. There was this terrible high pitched noise in the background. The last enemy had found you and you recognized him. Myung-suk. And there were more coming. The glint of steel meeting flesh flashed in your eyes. You reached out for him, your lover. His face went pale. 

        His inky black hair glistened in the moonlight. His blood stained the floorboards and there was still the screeching sound. You met his eyes one last time. His lips mouthed ‘it’s okay’.The man threw the captain’s lifeless body off the side of the ship. The screeching sound, you’d come to realize, were your own screams. His body was nothing more than a ripple in the sea. 

        The world went back into motion. You immediately kicked the young soldier in the chest, effectively winding him like you’d seen Namjoon do once or twice. Then you took a big fistful of his shirt and pushed him off the side of the ship, not hearing his cries over your own. You whispered a prayer for Jungkook and cursed Myung-suk.

            May Jungkook become one with the sea and may Poseidon have no mercy on the man with the bloodied knife. Your hands shook, pain overtaking your mind. You didn’t have time to sob. The ship was headed towards the rocks. The crew was still in the rowboat, waiting for someone to release them.

            Mourning would get you nowhere. Despite the aching cavity in your chest, your crew needed you. He would have wanted that. So you refused the urge to dive right into the sea after him. You just wanted to be one with the sea, to let it wash over your wounds. Instead, you ran down the decks you had spent the last year of your life on. The ghostly memories of your crewmates flooded back to you. 

            You saw Namjoon first, his memory turning to look at you. 

Ah, you’re the new crew member, I see? Welcome to the family. 

             You swiped at your eyes. Yoongi’s ghostly form stood, his harpoon in hand, the memory reminding you of sunny days.

Y/N, stop looking at me like that. If you want to know how to fish, I’ll show you. Here, c’mere. 

               You let another teardrop fall. The wheel sat empty as you passed it. Hoseok’s memory stood there, turning the ship, whispering with Jimin.

Y/N! Want to dance? 

             Jimin smiled, his eyes crinkling wonderfully. 

Y/N, I’m sorry for sleeping on the job last night. Thanks for covering for me!

              His chuckle was beautiful. Seokjin had his hands on his hips.

I didn’t put anything in that soup, you wusses. He argued. 

            Taehyung leaned his head on the side of the ship. 

It’s nothing, just a nightmare.  

             You tried to breathe, but the worst memory was next. 

             The sky seemed to clear as you went through it once more. A well built man stood on the end of the ship. The night of gunpowder fell away. His hair ruffled in the wind. He turned to you, a smile on his face, doe eyes crinkling in delight. Jungkook held out his hand, his captain attire as crisp as ever.

 Are you ready, little miss? 

               And you almost took his hand. 

              You tore your eyes away, turning to where the crew now rested. Six in the boat, one at the bottom of the sea, one staying on the ship. You started lowering the ropes, ignoring the shouts of the crew. You felt a ghostly presence and you just knew it was him. Jungkook placed a hand on your back, guiding you through the motions. 

“Sh, it’s going to be alright. Stop shaking, love. You’re doing so well.” He whispered words of praise. 

“Y/N, stop, just climb aboard.” Namjoon’s words suddenly hit you. You stared incredulously at the man. 

“So we can all die?” You shouted. Tears traced their way down your cheeks. “Namjoon, do you trust me?”

         The man looked unsure, a pain behind his eyes. He looked down at the sea, his eyes drifting to the place his oldest friend perished. He looked devastated. And he was. His heart was breaking open for the young boy who deserved better, the boy who despite all odds, worked to make a name for himself. But above all, he was glad that his body was resting in the waves of the place he loved the most; The sea. He couldn’t mourn, he had to do his job as a first mate. He had to become the leader the crew needed. He couldn’t hesitate and let them all perish. You weren’t budging either. 

          Did he trust you? 

          “Yes.” He responded softly. You nodded and let the ropes fall, placing the boat gently into the water. 

              You couldn’t stop the tremble of your hands. All you wanted to do was cry, fall to the floor and let the sobs overtake your body. The boat drifted into the ocean and the rope fell away. The other ship blasted a hole into the side of BTS. You tumbled to the ground, sobs finally wracking your body. You watched the rowboat headed toward the shore. 

“Get up.” Jungkook urged. “Y/N, get up.” His voice was firm, his ghost as clear as day. 

“Jungkook, I-”

“You shouldn’t have, love. I should’ve been there.” He whispered. “You should find another way out. Don’t sacrifice yourself for a foolish captain like me.” You could almost hear his sheepish smile.  

             You stood, placing your hands on the side of the ship and watching the water come closer. You sniffled, letting your stomach drop as the ship sunk farther. Your eyes were glossy with tears, your heart shattered, so with all the courage left in your body, you turned to face his ghost. You hair flew in the breeze and the moment was of peaceful contrast to moments before. 

“No, I’m going down with the ship.” 

               You were falling. The world seemed to slow, going still as if you had halted in mid air. The waves welcomed you home, embracing you to your bones. Taehyung’s smile, Jin’s laugh, Yoongi’s quiet nods, Hoseok’s dancing, Jimin’s eyes, Namjoon’s voice, Jungkook’s face.

           They held you close, but Jungkook’s ghost held you the tightest as the rest faded away. When you looked up, there was no shadowy figure diving in to save you. It was just dark, the light of the sinking BTS illuminating the water. 

            The ghost of his lips hovered over yours as the sky sank farther out of reach. Your lungs filled with water, body finally being overtaken with the sea. Black ink fell across your vision as Jungkook’s ghost whispered words of praise. A bittersweet ending to the ship of the Bulletproof Boy Scouts. 

             You glimpsed his face, his ethereal body hovering above you, now one with the ocean. The crew had always been a mess, a tragically beautiful mess, but him, most of all.  

Sea and the rock below Cocked to the undertow Bones, blood and teeth erode With every crashing node

Taglist: @lovelyseomin​ @yoongi-sugaglider​  @merakiiverse​ 

[certifiedskywalker]

Dating Ezra Bridger Would Include...

geekgreekgirl submitted:

Hi, do you still write for Star Wars Rebels? If do can I request a simple head cannon of what it would be like dating Ezra Bridger. Thank you

I hope this is good! I haven’t written for any Rebels in a long time!

You knew Lothal.

You knew it before the Empire.

You once ran through the streets of the city without fear.

Now, with the Empire, you couldn’t look out the window without fear.

Now, you struggled to make it through the week.

That was, until, you met Ezra Bridger.

He literally crashed into your life.

Like, while he was running, he crashed through your window.

The shattering sound was enough to wake you, strike fear in your heart.

“Who the Hell are you?!”

“Uh…”

“Who are you!?”

Your constant questioning seemed to scare the blue-eyed boy.

“I um-”

“He went this way!”

“Hide!” 

The boy darted towards you and you both fell into the hallway of your home.

Well, it wasn’t your home.

It was a home for someone, abandoned when the Empire came to power.

You had claimed it as your own. 

Now, it was ruined by a blue-eyed boy being chased by stormtroopers.

He placed his hand over your mouth and you tried to bite it.

Street living had taught you a few things…

...but this boy seemed to know a few things too.

“Shh!”

You were about to try again when you heard the stomping of Imperial issued boots.

“Where did he go?”

“You two, head North. If he took this alley, we can cut him off.”

You waited, chest heaving against the boys.

In the shadows of the home, your breath mingled with his own.

He was so close to you that you couldn’t look anywhere but his blue eyes.

His eyes were so blue.

Once the footfalls of the troopers began to fade, the boy moved off of you.

“Don’t yell at me. Okay?”

You furrowed your brows and the boy slowly removed his hand from your mouth.

“Who...are you?”

“I’m uh…”

You could see it in his face: he was going to lie.

“Don’t.”

His wide blue eyes met your gaze once more.

“Don’t what?”

“Lie to me.”

The boy’s mouth opened and his hand lifted to push through the dark locks of his hair.

“Ezra.”

“Why were they chasing you, Ezra?”

He hesitated again.

You jerked your leg and kicked your foot against Ezra’s leg.

“Ouch! What was that?!”

“Don’t lie to me,” you said coldly.

“Why shouldn’t I? I don’t know you!”

Ezra got to his feet and you did too.

You pressed yourself close to him, hoping to make him uncomfortable.

“You owe me!”

“Owe you! For what?”

You pointed angrily towards the window he had crashed through.

“You screwed up my fort!”

You didn’t mean to say it like that.

Even to yourself, your words sounded like they came from a whining child.

Ezra, unable to keep from smiling, turned his back to you.

You saw his shoulder shake and heard a low, stifled laugh.

Soon, you were laughing too.

From that moment on, you and Ezra became inseparable.

He took you to his tower, showed you his helmet collection.

The two of you would run scams together.

Stealing food for (an from) each other.

You get competitive about who can find the most stuff for that day.

You were with him when he met Kanan for the first time.

“That was close.”

“Too close, Ezra. I think he saw us.”

“We’ll be okay, Y/N.”

He grabbed your hand to comfort you.

It was the first touch from Ezra that made you feel something more than friendship.

“We’ll be okay.”

And you were.

Once you and Ezra were inducted into the Ghost Crew, life became so much better.

You and Sabine grew close.

Zeb, while he likes you more, still is annoyed by your and Ezra’s presence.

“Quiet!”

“Sorry sleep cat!”

Hera becomes your closest confidant.

She teaches you about piloting and shows you all of the Ghost’s quirks.

“She may not be the fastest, but she’s a hearty beast.”

“She’s a good ship,” you agreed.

One day, you were outside, helping Hera with repairs.

It was one of those easy days.

A day when there was nowhere to be or any urge to look for something to get involved in.

There were no battles to fight or trouble to cause.

It was an easy day on Lothal.

There was a soft breeze that rustled the grass and messed with your hair.

For once you felt at peace and-

“Hiyah!”

“Ezra! No!”

You opened your eyes and glared over to where Kanan and Ezra were training.

You watched as their blue sabers swung about, but missed whatever Ezra had done wrong.

What you did see was Ezra.

He was stronger now.

Not as scrawny as when you met him but he was still wiry.

He was still your Ezra.

His hair, the length of which he had been complaining about for the last week, danced in the wind and left his face exposed.

Sweat covered his brow and there was a seriousness in his features that made you stomach twist.

“Y/N?”

When did Ezra become so…

“Y/N!?”

You looked and saw Hera, oil smudged across her green skin, waiting for you to hand her the wrench in your hand.

“Sorry.” 

You passed the tool to her but Hera didn’t go back to fixing the Ghost.

“Distracted?”

You looked over at the Twi’lek with a confused expression.

You weren’t confused by what she meant, you simply didn’t want to give her assumption any foothold.

She rolled her eyes and tipped her head towards Kanan and Ezra.

“He likes you too, ya know.”

“Hera, I-I don’t think that-”

“That’s right,” she said, cutting you off, “don’t think. Thinking is the bane of the heart. Trust me.”

You raised a brow at her and leaned in. 

“You sound like you’re speaking from experience.”

It was now you that tipped your head towards the training Jedi.

Specifically, towards Kanan.

“That’s because I am.”

She turned back to the Ghost and you heard her sigh.

“Now, can you hand me that light?”

After that, you were careful around Ezra.

You wanted to be his friend...well...more than his friend really...

...but you didn’t want to ruin what you already had with him. 

You kept to yourself on missions, told yourself that it was for the best.

Ezra would try to get close to you, more so than before and you shrugged him off.

It always hurt you: the expression on his face after you made yourself too busy to talk to him.

Hera picked up on your tactics and tried to get you to change your mind.

“Do you remember what I said?”

“Yes, but I don’t want to lose him.”

“You may lose him this way too, Y/N.”

It was the night before Ezra and Kanan departed Malachor.

Ezra stood in your doorway as you were sorting through supplies.

“We’re leaving soon, Y/N.”

You turned to face him for a moment and gave him a half-hearted smile.

“Good luck then.”

“That’s it? ‘Good luck then’? What’s wrong? Why won’t you talk to me?!”

Ezra reached and you felt him grab your arm.

You didn’t pull away from his touch.

If anything, you found yourself leaning into it.

“Did I do something wrong, Y/N? Please, tell me if I did. I can’t keep-”

You grabbed his arm with your free hand and pulled him to you.

Your lips melded with Ezra’s and his worries died on his tongue.

The hand he hands holding your arm suddenly let go

Only to move to your waist.

He grabbed at your clothes in an attempt to pull you all the more closer to him.

He couldn’t get enough.

But soon, you pulled away.

“I was wrong,” you murmured.

Ezra’s lips broke into a grin.

“That’s a first.”

When he left for Malachor, you weren’t worried.

When he came back, with Kanan blinded, you were worried.

He cried in your arms that night, told you about how guilty he felt.

He showed you the Sith holocron and begged for you to understand.

He didn’t need to beg.

You understand Ezra Bridger in a way no one less did.

You help him with his hair when he wants to cut it.

“How do I look?”

“Handsome as ever.”

You guys sneak out to watch the stars in Ezra’s old tower whenever you’re on Lothal.

“Do you still think about them?”

“Who?” Ezra was still looking at the stars when he asked.

You were looking at him.

“Your parents.”

When he met your gaze, with those blue-blue eyes of his, you swear you could feel the Force swirl around you both.

“I do, especially when I’m with you. They would have liked you, Y/N.”

You’re all of his impulse control.

“Don’t.”

“You don’t even know what I’m-”

“I do, actually, and don’t.”

Ezra’s hugs are the best.

He wraps his arms around your waist and makes himself as small as he can.

Whenever he needs to rant about Kanan’s training, he plops himself on your bed with his head in your lap.

“I just...I just...UGH!”

“Use your words, E.”

It’s a teasing relationship; one with soft kisses and inside jokes.

Zeb, while he still thinks the two of you can get annoying, loves that you and Ezra are finally together.

Hera jokes around with Kanan about the two of you.

“They’re so sweet on each other. Sabine can’t even look at them or, as she says, she ‘gets a toothache’.”

“I wish I could see them.”

“You don’t have to,” Hera told him, “you can feel their love.”

It’s true.

Your love with Ezra, the love you have for each other, is like the Force.

It’s always there, around you, pushing the two of you together.

It was there from the first moment you looked into his blue eyes.

[glitterandmoondustofficial]

Side To Side

Chapter 197: Nakama

Characters: Law, Ruby, Shachi, Penguin Rating: T Warnings: Language, blood mention, nakedness, kissing Notes: Aaaaaannnnndddddd.....

~~~~~

Ruby stared at the woman in front of her with a nonchalant gaze. She curled her fingers, a couple of them popping. Lillie-Mai breathed heavily, staring at Ruby wildly. Ruby sighed through her nose.

“What...did you do to me?!” Lillie-Mai demanded.

“I poisoned you,” Ruby said simply.

“We agreed on no powers!”

“And? I’m a pirate. I’m not going to just play nice while my captain lays helpless.” Ruby flipped her hair.

Lillie-Mai stumbled to the ground. “How did you even do it?”

Ruby wiggled her fingers. “Rather classily. I coated my finger nails in a paralyzing poison from a plant I once discovered. Don’t worry it won’t kill you.”

Lillie-Mai’s eyebrows rose. “What?”

Ruby rolled her neck. “I’m tired of fighting,” she whined. “Fight fight fight. Break some bones, lose a foot, bleed to death, I’m tired, man. All this fighting and scraps and ugh,” she made a disgusted face. “It’s so not fun.”

“Then why even stay a pirate? On the Grand Line, even. Why fight for this captain of yours if all he does is make you tired?”

Ruby closed her eyes. “He would never make me do something if I really didn’t need to,” she said quietly. “I’m going back.”

“You’re just going to leave me here?”

“Yes. I-”

“Ruby!”

Ruby damn near snapped her neck the way she whipped her head to the side. She blinked twice before frowning deeply. She took a deep breath and looked back at Lillie-Mai. “It looks like our fight was pointless.” Ruby paused. “You have your life, the poison will wear off soon.” Lillie-Mai glared up at her. Ruby sighed and turned.

“Iunia,” Lillie-Mai snapped. “Why keep me alive? I tried to kill you and your captain.”

Ruby stopped. She had an unreadable expression on her face. She sighed. “I guess my captain has a bigger influence on me than I care to admit.” She sighed again. “Killing no longer interests me. If you want to die, do it yourself. I’m done with you.” Ruby started walking towards Law. She stopped in front of him, relief in her eyes. “I see you’re awake.”

“Seems like it.” Ruby gave him a tired smile. “You’re a mess.”

“Well, I was just in a fist fight.”

“A fist fight? No powers?”

“Yep, until I cheated and coated my fingernails in poison of course.”

“Ah.”

Ruby started to walk forward. He followed after her, and when there was an appropriate amount of distance between that woman who caused all this and the two of them, he grabbed her hand tightly.

Ruby smiled warmly. She looked at Law. “Are you okay? You look exhausted.”

“I am.” They stopped and stared at each other. Law wrapped his arms around her tightly. Ruby rubbed his back in comfort. “Thanks for fighting for me.”

Ruby smiled happily. “You’re welcome, mo chuisle.”

~~~~~

Law and Ruby had made it back to the sub quietly, neither of them really needing to speak. Penguin and Shachi were on deck looking pissed as hell. They caught sight of the both of them, both of their arms crossed in anger.

“Ruby,” Penguin shouted. “Hold him still so I can beat the shit out of him.”

Ruby blinked and looked over to Law. Law looked at her sheepishly. “Did you leave before they said you could?” Law didn’t answer. Ruby gave him a tired smile. “What am I supposed to do with you?” She asked him fondly.

Penguin and Shachi ran up to them. They checked over the both of them and Law had to admit that he was definitely exhausted. He sighed tiredly and let Shachi lecture him. He watched Ruby as Penguin pulled her onto the sub, saying that he’d help her clean up.

“Captain!” Shachi snapped. “Are you even listening?”

“No.”

Shachi scoffed. “We were worried about you, you know.”

“Sorry.”

“Are you?”

“Sorry for worrying you? Yes. Sorry for leaving? No. I’d do it again.”

“You’re singled minded and stupid. What would have happened if you had passed out in the middle of that forest? Ruby could’ve waited.” Law didn’t answer him and Shachi sighed. “I know you love her. You love her so fucking much, dude. But, Law, you gotta think things through sometimes. You’re so calculated, but when she’s in danger you just don’t care.”

“It’s not like that,” Law said defensively. “I wouldn’t have gone if I really thought I couldn’t make it.”

“You didn’t think at all,” Shachi grumbled. “Let’s just get you to bed. I’m tired. You’re tired. I’m sure Ruby is exhausted.” Shachi sighed.

“Yeah,” he patted Shachi on the back. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

Law made it up to his room and collapsed on the bed. He was tired, and because he was so tired, he was starting to become depressed.

He missed his family. He frowned deeply and closed his eyes. He wanted to see them, for real. He missed them so much it ached. He was getting lost in his thoughts when he heard Ruby walk into the room. She kicked off her heels, cursing and complaining about the pain. She unzipped her dress and that fell on the ground as well. She grumbled and cursed as she threw off the rest of her clothes.

He heard her walk into the bathroom and turn on the shower. Law opened his eyes and sat up. He stood up and walked towards the bathroom, watching Ruby take her hair down and shake it out.

“You going to join me?” She asked, not looking at him.

“Yeah,” he said, not meaning to sound as tired as he did. Penguin had cleaned her up nicely. She wasn’t bleeding from her nose anymore and the dirt and dried blood that were on her face, arms, and hands were mostly gone.

“You sure? You look exhausted.” She looked over to him, worry evident on her face.

“Yeah,” he said and took off his shirt. Ruby walked over to him and started to unbutton his jeans. Law let out a sigh. This was reality. This was the present time. Ruby was in front of him. She was here. She was real. She was his Ruby and he had never loved someone the way he loved her.

Law took her hands and squeezed them.

Ruby stopped and looked at their hands, and then to his face. She sighed. They embraced. They embraced tightly. Too much fighting without the other by their side. Too many injuries and too many close calls.

Law could tell she was tired. He knew that she wanted to live on an island where no one knew her name. But he knew she would never leave the crew. He knew she would follow him to hell. So he sighed and kissed her hair.

“I love you,” he whispered desperately. “I love you,” he repeated.

Ruby’s fingers pressed into his back. Her breathing was normal, her heartbeat calm. She was fine. She was a little dirty, had a few bruises, but she was fine. She was his. She was alive. She was his lover, his partner. He hugged her tighter.

Ruby snorted. The sound caused him to open his eyes. “Alright.” She patted his back. “Don’t get all emotional on me.” Ruby pulled away with a teasing grin. “I dunno what you saw but-”

He kissed her. He kissed her hard. She didn’t understand. It may have been just a couple hours for her, but it felt like weeks to him. It was weeks without her touch, her kiss, her taste. He missed her so badly even though he didn’t know her. She was so important to him that even when he was forced to forget her, she was still, somehow, part of him.

Law was aware of what a mess he was going to be when he was apart from her when he went to Dressrosa.

Ruby wrapped her arms around his neck. She kissed him deeply, responding to his intensity. He pawed at her body. He felt the sweat and dirt on her skin, not caring about how it covered his hands.

Ruby pulled away, their breaths mingling together hotly. Ruby chuckled. “That’s one hell of a greeting.” Law leaned his forehead on hers. “Come on,” she brushed her lips against his. “Let’s get in the shower.”

Law grunted and removed the rest of his clothing. He followed her into the shower, watching the dirt on her skin wash away. He leaned in and kissed her shoulder, running his hand up her side. He bit her skin slowly and softly. Ruby let out a soft sigh.

“You know,” her melodic voice started. “I still need to wash myself.” She teased him, He could hear the laughter in her voice.

“I’ll wash you.”

“You better.” She giggled.

He washed her diligently, kissing her body when he saw fit. Ruby was enjoying herself, a content smile on her face. He leaned his forehead on hers and closed his eyes.

“You’ve been quiet,” she spoke up. “More than usual that is. What’s on your mind? What did you see?”

“I saw,” he started. “I saw my family.” Ruby waited patiently for his response. “I saw a happy little life. No struggle, no pain. I wasn’t tired, I wasn’t traumatized. I was happy and healthy.”

Ruby was silent for a moment, staring at him. “Well,” she said. “Sounds boring.”

Law grinned and took her face in his hands and kissed her forehead. Ruby grinned widely. “Yeah, you could say that.” Ruby wrapped her arms around him. “I missed you guys.”

“Did you?”

“Yeah. I kept seeing you guys. In bars, in my dreams, in the hospital. My brain was trying to wake me up, saying it wasn’t real.” He sighed. “I was engaged.”

“Engaged? Dream Law cares about marriage?”

“Makes sense I suppose. Grew up in a healthy, safe environment. I had a normal life. Normal people get married.”

“Girl or boy or…?”

“Girl. She looked very different from you.”

“That doesn’t surprise me. I bet she was all soft and curvy and wasn’t as pale as a ghost.”

“Yep. You’re way prettier, though.” Ruby hummed. “Feeling self conscious?”

“Nah. The whole reason this all happened was to upset me. I figured something similar might happen.” She smiled at him. “I know you love me.”

Law felt relief wash over him. She knew. She knew he loved her with a love so fierce that he would die for her. He kissed her. He held her close and tasted her like he hadn’t done it a thousand times before.

Ruby’s hand slid up his stomach and chest. Her thumb rubbed his peck. Her other arm was around his torso, her fingers pressed into his back. They kissed intensely, only parting because they needed to take a breath.

“I don’t know what’s gotten into you but I like it,” she giggled. “I like you paying this much attention to me.” She kissed his bottom lip.

“As if I don’t pay too much attention to you,” he mumbled to her. “Needy woman.”

“Yep! You knew what you were getting into.” She gave him a large, wild grin.

He grinned back at her, palming her back and kissing her again and again. Ruby giggled happily against his lips. “I love you,” he breathed on her lips.

They rested their foreheads together, grinning at each other. That smile. Those eyes. They were everything he could ever hope for. This was real. This was his reality. He missed his family, the sting of their deaths would always be in his heart, but he had a new family that he loved just as much. He had his crew, he had Ruby, he had his past and his future. This was his life, and he’d gladly live through it for the rest of his short life.

[chordstrvck-blog]

sharp gray eyes size up their unwanted companion through a lung-staled waft of smoke. “ ‘ey. ”  a tip of the chin. cigarette ash darts to pavement. crunch. eddie grinds that shit in, real good. nothin’ like a pair of trusty docs to do the trick. “ what the fuck’s your damage ? ”

or alternatively :  yo, yo, whassgood ?  the name’s liana ( she/her/hers ) and i am so friggin’ hyped to bring you my spoopy lil’ music man, eddie williams !!  below the cut you’ll find a big hodge-podged mess of facts, potential connects, and other delicious chips of info. his favorites are hoppin’ jalapeno crunch tators, thanks for fuckin’ askin’. (   imagine how heartbroken he’ll be when frito lay discontinues them in the 90′s... rest in spaghetti never forgetti.    )

— ❝ wait is that THOMAS HAYES ? or is that KEITH EDISON “EDDIE” WILLIAMS who arrived in las vegas TWENTY-THREE years ago? HE is TWENTY-THREE years old. last time i checked they were a GUITARIST IN CRIMSON & CLOVER / ARTIST AT ATOMIC TATTOOS . rumour has it they’re very BEGUILING and very HARUM-SCARUM. the CISMALE reminds me of SAY WHAT YOU WILL BY FASTWAY.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: DEATH, DOMESTIC ABUSE, VIOLENCE, DRUG USE/ABUSE, MENTIONS OF ADDICTION.

eddie is the lovely ivy williams [ @poiseonxivy​ ] ’s older brother !  they grew up in a contentious household here in vegas, with an abusive alcoholic for a father and a complacent/despondent mother. fed up with the abuse and chaos, their mother walked out on them when eddie was 13. he and ivy caught her in the act, and this savage kid called her out for being a coward and opened the fuckin’ door for her. “ die in a ditch, ”  is the last thing he ever said to that sorry waste of a woman.

naturally, things with their father only got worse. he was quick to provoke and impossible to please. the williams siblings had to step up to upkeep their home, make sure bills got paid, etc., all while receiving the worst of it from their father. ivy, as the youngest, was blamed for the family’s downfall. eddie got berated and slurred at for his tendency to peruse his sister’s things, paint his middle fingers interesting colors, ask her to do his makeup on halloween. his father was the first person to ever look eddie in the eye and call him a faggot, and, well... that shit dug deep.

it’s not that he’s overly concerned about it. hell, labels are fuckin’ dumb, alright? he’d sooner be gagged with a spoon than told he has to live his life all boxed up. he doesn’t care that the lady at the bar’s stunning and so is the guy pourin’ her drink, alright? what he does care about is... what if he is that thing his dad said? what if he... what if he is the man his dipshit dad saw in him ?

guitarist in el’s band, crimson & clover !  the band formed several years ago and has been playing gigs ever since. it’s definitely made him grow as a guitarist :  you can frequently find eddie chilling on fire escapes experimenting with new riffs and the like. he’s absolutely got that band aesthetic ––  distressed tees, tight pants, leather, leather, leather. doc martens. beat up sneaks. jaw-length hair, wavy. usually teased on stage and left to its own devices off-stage. music has always been an escape for him, especially from the hellscape that was his childhood home. catch him chillin in el’s record shop, cig in hand, blissed out to the latest rock releases blasting in his headphones.

jake wheeler’s next-door neighbor / best friend !  we have yet to plot about this, but that’s a wc eddie fills & we could do something with that, too!

tw: drugs, abusive tendencies, mild violence.  eddie’s genetics do predispose him to addiction. and, unfortunately, this bitch way more than dabbles in a haphazard lifestyle. he’s BIG into psychedelics, stimulants. alcohol. acid. he’ll pulverize the occasional bar asshole’s face. make fights out of nothing. but s’not a problem, alright ? he’s cool. he’s cool.   (  this guy’s a sinkin’ ship in heavy ass denial.  )

art. tattooing.  art has also played a pivotal role in eddie’s life. from a very young age, he created edgy doodles: skeletons in their sunday best, ghost cartoons carrying guns. the late 60′s/early 70′s saw his school notebooks filling with vietnam-inspired strips, doodles, and sketches. he used to draw “tattoos” on his fellow delinquents during detention in sharpie ink. gave himself his first poke tattoo on his ankle  ( a scrawled so what ? )  in eighth grade. now, he works as a tattooist at atomic tattoos. always flirts with the clientele. and they always leave happy.

tw: death. wears a dharma wheel pendant at all times, tucked beneath his shirt or, if he’s shirtless, just out in the open. he’ll say he found it in the street, but it actually belonged to a guy he started seeing his senior year of high school, in secret.  glenn farley. he was older, around 27, but he offered up the first safe place eddie’d ever known. dude disappeared close to eddie’s graduation. eddie stayed angry for a long time, until his photo turned up in the obits :  glenn was killed in a hit-and-run outside a dive bar.

on the topic of sexuality & gender expression :   eddie honestly couldn’t give a flyin’ shit. he’s of the belief that existence shouldn’t be coded or explained. so, yeah, he’s male. and yeah, he’ll be attracted to whomever he pleases. but in a time where that shit’s not too common? not too accepted? he does feel like he’s playing hide-and-seek. it’s exhausting. and... there’s still something that nags him, at the back of his mind, when he decides to hook up with a guy. it’s all tied up with his family history ( see the stuff about his dad above ) .

eddie is very outspoken & unfiltered. he won’t mince his words; he’ll speak bullets without considering the exit wound. 

he’d much rather have coffee and cigarettes than a meal. but if he’s gotta have food? and you’re forcing him? cinnamon waffles with ten gallons of syrup. delicious.

wears rings because hell, if he’s gonna punch you, he wants that shit to hurt.

smells like tobacco and amber and fresh-fallen rain.

likes makeup. tends to get away with some eyeliner/eyeshadow on stage, but typically doesn’t wear any day-to-day. maybe some eyeliner on his waterline, but... he’s learned how to get by.

cross his sister and he’ll eat your face for breakfast.

default greeting: blinking at you like you’re offending him by taking in the same air.

honestly he’s never thought to leave vegas. he likes it here. his crew? they’re good people. as in reckless. fun.

has almost a full sleeve on his left arm, and two bands curling around his right bicep. one ear pierced, but doesn’t always wear an earring there.

can he offer you a winter green lifesaver in this trying time ??

goes by eddie or williams. call him keith and he can’t be held responsible for what happens to you. the only person who’s got keith privileges is his kid sister.

thomas hayes has brown eyes but eddie’s are a staggeringly light blue-gray. they look like ice. he’s 6′1 and that type of lanky that tends to look sleek, enticing, and mildly emaciated. he does have muscle to him, but the guy doesn’t eat very often and he’s on a steady diet of destructive habits, so... he’s got that matty healy circa 2012 vibe going on

potential connects.

chaos crew. they hit the clubs. they try their hand at scheming and tricking the best poker leagues. chug beers, crush the cans, and toss ‘em in front of cars. experiment with drug cocktails and haunt the town. all laughs and dilated pupils and forgetting, forgetting, forgetting the cracks in their ribs, the scabs on their knuckles. nothin’ hurts when your blood pumps this quick.

diner pal.  eddie rolls up to his favorite diner in the wee hours of the morning. 2am, 3am. when he can’t sleep or he’s comin’ down from a heckish night, he’s there, whole pitcher of coffee and a stack of waffles. mussed hair. an entire encyclopedia of wild stories. one night, he stumbled into this person’s booth high as all shit, and they’ve been inviting themselves to one another’s tables ever since. could be a romantic connection. could be platonic.

ex on bad terms.  kid’s got commitment issues. i’d love to give them a source.

fuckbuddies.  they could just be friends who get fucked and do the deed. maybe there’s feelings. maybe it’s a you service me, i’ll service you situation. either way, they’re indulgent. they’re reckless. and they’ve got no regard for any damage they’ll cause.

people he’s tattooed.  

sworn enemies.  acerbic words, gnashing teeth, icy glares. they’ll cross the fuckin’ street just to avoid being within a ten-foot radius of one another.

caretaker.  a friend ( or even stranger ) who’s taken it on themselves to monitor this maelstrom. all i can say is... good friggin’ luck, kid.

obviously there are so many more but this is just a list to get some juices flowing !

if you want to plot, please feel free to message me !!  i’m headed to the gym now but after that i’ll hit up the starter tags !!  so flipping excited to write with you goons !!

[superherotigerarchives]

Rey Bridger Fanfic: Apart

 This is a fanfic based on these pictures I drew, using the theory that Ezra is Rey's father. It's pretty sad, but hopefully you'll enjoy ;D

Before the Ghost had even touched the surface of the planet Ezra propelled himself off the ramp in a powerful leap.

He was too caught up in his thoughts to hear Kanan shouting his name from behind, rolling onto the soft, damp soil and jumping to his feet. The world was shrouded in darkness, thick rolling clouds storming up above as a slight drizzle of rain hit his features. He couldn’t see much until the dust started the settle, the Ghost landing heavily behind him.

“Ezra!” he heard Kanan call again, the footsteps of his mentor speeding towards him.

But the male wasn’t listening. He was focused only on one thing… He was only focused on her…

When the message had been beamed out of an attack on the New Jedi Temple, the Ghost crew had been the first to act. The idea alone was almost unfathomable. Who would attack Luke’s Jedi order? Especially during a period where peace ran strong with the New Republic.

Ezra couldn’t believe it. He… wouldn’t believe it!

With a push from his legs the man broke out into a sprint, running forward with a fierce determination while reaching out for that presence… any presence for that matter.

But all he felt was the cold, the icy chill that seeped all the way into his core.

In each second that passed Ezra’s search only became more desperate, his boots digging into the mud beneath as he panted raggedly. Kanan’s voice was blown away in the wind as the dark sky above rumbled and growled. And regardless of the fact that he couldn’t see his path in this murky night, he pushed onward, holding his breath and praying to the force she was alright.

Then suddenly, Ezra’s foot snagged on something.

He immediately tripped onto the ground, mud sliding up his side as he stabbed his fingers into the dirt to stabilise himself. Gliding for a few more seconds over the slick ground, Ezra whipped his head back to stare at what he’d fallen over.

He squinted, unable to make out its dark silhouette as the rain fogged his vision.

CRACK!

The lightning flashed above, illuminating the object for a single moment.

But it was long enough for Ezra to finally realise what he’d tripped over, almost screaming in terror as he scrambled back in the mud.

The surroundings grew dark again, but Ezra’s heartbeat raced as the image of a young, lifeless boy with blood smeared all over his face and chest stayed engrained into his vision.

Clambering to his feet in distress, the Jedi whipped around and shifted his gaze to the horizon as yet another streak of lightning brightened the eerie sky.

But Ezra’s face paled when he saw tens, maybe even hundreds of other bodies scattered across the field, figures of various sizes laying there, as still as statues. The world fell into darkness again, but Ezra’s petrified gaze flickered to the enormous shadow a little to his left. He wanted to be wrong, he wanted to be imagining it… But with another crack and flash from above, Ezra’s worst nightmare had finally been confirmed.

The outline of the Jedi Temple, the building that once stood so tall was enlightened, revealing its shattered structure and crumbling walls. This beautiful piece of architecture was stripped, exploded and branded with lightsaber chars, the stone dull and lifeless, just like the many other people, other children of the force were.

It finally dawned on Ezra as he stepped back with a gasp.

He bumped into someone, but he didn’t even notice when Kanan gently placed his hand on his shoulder, his touch so foreign in Ezra’s moment of realisation.

“Ezra,” he spoke solemnly.

The younger male didn’t reply immediately, his mouth opening and closing, but no sound leaving his lips. Until finally, with a hitch in his chest, he stuttered fearfully “T-Tell me I’m dreaming, Kanan… tell me this is a-a nightmare…”

His master said nothing, but simply squeezed his shoulder as a sign of support.

Ezra’s heartbeat picked up again, as he went to step forward and screamed “REY!”

“Ezra,” Kanan’s hand pulled him back, electric blue eyes scanning the sea of bodies for the young child. But his mentor’s tone was low, and gentle, as he murmured with sorrow “We scanned for lifeforms when we landed…”

“I’m sorry…”

Ezra already felt tears forming in the back of his eyes, but it was only when Kanan said the final words that his heart broke into a million pieces.

“There are no survivors…”

Immediately, a raw, painful weep escaped Ezra’s lips, his legs growing weak as he collapsed onto the soil beneath him.

He cried fiercely in that moment, and as if the heavens itself were mourning, the storm grew louder and the rain fell harder. The male’s clothes and skin began to get drenched, but he didn’t even care. His eyes were burning with tears, his heart shattered.

With his head hung low, Ezra’s mind shifted back through his memories, back to the moment he stood in this very place and said goodbye to his little girl…

…

“Luke!” Ezra greeted cheerily.

“Ezra! I got your message! It’s great to see you again!” the Jedi smiled as he stepped forward. He glanced at the figure in his arms curiously and asked “Is this your daughter? My how she’s grown.”

A proud grin pulled at Ezra’s lips as he shifted his attention to the little girl in his arms who hid her face away meekly. “Don’t worry darling,” he cooed warmly. “This is Master Luke. He won’t hurt you.”

The child glanced up at him with her dazzling hazel eyes, her expression pulled into a suspicious pout.

Ezra smiled softly. “Where’s my Rey of sunshine?”

There was a reluctant pause, before Rey flashed a charming, lively grin.

“Ah, there it is!” Ezra teased lightly, pressing a kiss against her forehead and causing the child to giggle. But there was a deep pain in Ezra’s voice as he hesitantly raised his gaze back to Luke, his eyes shadowing over darkly.

“I’m sorry Luke, but I’m afraid I can’t stay for long,” he admitted drearily. “Kanan and I are getting closer to finally destroying what remains of the Sith, but, that comes with lots of unnecessary dangers…”

“I completely understand Ezra,” the master replied encouragingly. “And I can assure you, Rey will be well looked after while you’re away.”

Ezra shot Luke a weary smile, before he gently lowered himself to the ground and placed Rey stably on her feet. On his knee, her father remained eye-level with the girl as he mustered a weak smile and brushed some unseen dust off her shoulder.

“Darling,” Ezra started, his eyes showing a different emotion to his face. “Daddy has to go away for a while.”

The child asked “Can I come with you?”

“I’m afraid not.”

Confused, Rey pried “Why not?”

He sighed sympathetically, replying “Sorry Honey, but it’s very dangerous, and I don’t want you getting hurt.”

Her little brows furrowed tightly as her hand rested on her father’s shoulder, and she gripped onto the fabric of his shirt tightly and mumbled “You’re leaving me?”

“Of course not darling, you’re just… visiting Master Luke for a month or so, that’s all,” Ezra assured her gently. “You’re going to love it here! There’s tons of other kids just like you. I’m pretty sure Luke has a nephew who’d love to meet as well.”

She didn’t seem convinced, her gaze growing anxious as she shifted from foot to foot. It was hurting Ezra too. He loved his daughter dearly, and there wouldn’t be a day in his life where he didn’t think of her… but the risks were too high. He’d never forgive himself if something happened to her while Kanan and him were out hunting for trouble essentially.

She’d be safer with Luke… She’d be safe at the temple…

That’s what Ezra kept telling himself anyway.

So lovingly, the male placed his hands on Rey’s shoulders and kissed her forehead, pulling back and saying “I love you to Lothal and back Rey, and I’ll be back soon. I promise.”

The girl pouted, before she replied uncertainly “Promise?”

Ezra smiled, saying “Of course my darling. I’ll be back before you know it.”

There was a tense moment, before Rey lunged forward, wrapping her arms tightly around her father’s neck in a warm embrace. “I love you Daddy,” she whispered timidly.

Ezra could feel his eyes beginning to sting, but he pushed it away and returned his daughter’s hug fiercely, securing her in his arms one last time before he left.

Luke stepped forward after a few moments, and Ezra reluctantly pulled away, taking one last look into Rey’s gleaming eyes before carefully raising her hand up to the Jedi Master.

Luke softly took Rey’s hand in his, and began to guide her away.

Her expression was one of great sorrow as she hesitantly held her other arm out for her father, unwilling to break their gazes. Ezra, still on his knee, put on a fake façade of confidence and smiled warmly. He held his hand out, and with each step Rey’s small hand slid along Ezra’s arm, until finally, their fingertips parted, their touch absent.

Rey was still looking back at her father with wide eyes and her hand extended back to him, but never the less she didn’t resist Luke’s gentle guidance as he began walking her towards the temple ahead.

The sight of her desperate expression hurt Ezra deeply, but he mustered his courage and held a smile, telling himself she’d be okay…

She’d be safer with Luke…

She’d be safer at the temple…

…

Lies…

I’d fed myself with lies…

And now she was gone… my daughter was gone…

My tears fell from my face and blended into the already muddy soil, the thunder above drowning out the sounds of my pitiful sobs. I reached forward with my hand, as if to reach out to her, as if to get her back…

But she was gone. My Rey was gone forever. And it was all my fault.

So as I cried out in agony, my weeps getting carried throughout the desolate, lifeless temple, I asked myself one question…

Why did I ever let her go?