#he got the moves like jagger

[drugsforaddicts]

You better WERK princess!

[silly-chiroptera]

this is what happened in location 69 right

[epickiya722]

Just saying when Dabi's dance does get animated, I'll be the worse person to talk to about it.

Why?

Because I'm be thinking of all the songs to fit in that scene.

[multiimistakes]

For all his crimes, I think Gavin's biggest is the fact he is an unironic enjoyer of Mar*on 5 and Nickelb*ck.

[samstatsupremacy]

My notes from the 92NY Q&A

Someone from Mayfair Witches is in IWTV S2 and Mayfair S2

Ben Daniels sent a thank-you letter to Rollin Jones re: working with such a beautiful cast and lovely project (and called himself Santi-baby in it). Jacob did his best Ben impression and read the email aloud to us.

The two actors Rolin KNEW they wanted from the beginning were Eric and Ben Daniels, before they even started casting

Jacob refused to pit Loumand and Loustat against each other. Said they have different vibes

Sam insists that we won't see "the real Lestat" until S3. We're only seeing everyone else's perception of him (very tongue-in-cheek). In response, Assad said, "Armand has a very good memory. Maybe the most accurate!"

Jacob said filming the Dreamstat scenes with Sam was like slipping on a glove, or an old sock (cue slightly inappropriate giggles from audience)

Delainey said her chemistry read with Jacob felt like everyone else in the room just faded away, and she bonded with him first on set

Lestat plays Harlequin instead of Lelio this season, and the moderator was so affected by Sam's performance that he said "I got pregnant after watching it." Rollin said it was "moves like Jagger" on that theater stage lol. Sam had trouble reconciling this part but he did have fun

Any time Jacob gets complimented, he tries to brush it off. He's so humble!

Delainey said Claudia knows Louis better than he knows himself, and Jacob* thinks he knows her but he doesn't

Eric said that Daniel's impression of Dubai situation is he's just sick of the lies and games from Loumand. He won't be intimidated, and if you push, he pushes back harder. He will not be bullied (much like himself, he added)

Lots of hype for ep5 of this season. Eric said it was the most traumatizing episode he's seen in his life. Everyone else agrees that it gets pretty heavy re: young Daniel's interview

Eric said "working with Jacob is like flying" and Jacob said "the feeling is entirely mutual" - so sweet!

Assad was so preciously nervous bc he admittedly still gets intimidated by the cast. He was struggling to finish his thoughts. He did praise how open and loving the whole cast and crew are. It was cute.

"When Louis meets Armand, Armand is kind of lost but putting on this facade of power that Louis sees through" (Assad's words)

Question: any fun moments off set that still make you laugh? Response: Sam and Jacob look at each other and just burst into laughter. They really struggled to find an answer that they felt was appropriate to share and barely answered it 😅

Q: What series would your character binge?

Everyone answered as their character:

Armand: Buffy

Daniel: Breaking Bad

Claudia: The OA

Lestat: The Real Housewives

Louis: The Real Housewives ("YOU LITERALLY TOOK MY ANSWER" to Sam)

This doesn't even cover the encounters I saw at the stage door. I'll do a separate post for that, maybe

[pottersolos]

pinky promise ? • Joe Burrow.

summary : joe knows his fiancé, charleigh had a rough day so he try’s to make it better.

warnings : idk.

pairing : fiance!joeburrow x fiance!charleigh.

——————————————————————

“babe !” i shouted through joe and i’s shared house, i had just finished my skincare and was about to brush my teeth but i didn’t know where joe had put our toothpaste.

“yes ?” i could hear his foot steps on the stairs as he walked up them, i met him in the doorway before speaking, “where’d you put the toothpaste ?”

“it’s in the draw” he said, he could tell by the look on my face that my day had been hell, he grabbed my hand dragging me into the bathroom with him, he opened the draw and grabbed the tube out.

he propped up his phone-knowing i like to get moments like this on record-and engulfed me in a tight hug, kissing my wet hair as my arms snaked around his shirtless torso, my head resting on his chest.

his hand begun stroking my head as i rested my eyes, i felt his hand stop on the back of my neck, gently moving my head to look up at him “you okay ?” he question, i nodded my head, sending him a flatlipped smile.

“i ordered chick-fil-a it should be here soon” said joe, i looked up at him and kissed his cheek.

“how ‘bout you get a movie ready in the living room and i go to the store, and i promise i’ll be right back” he smiled at me, i nodded and grabbed one of his hands and held it as we walked down the stairs.

he slid on his tazman uggs and grabbed the keys off the counter, he opened the door, he was standing in the frame and i stuck to the side of the door holding the knob.

“be fast please” i begged, “i will” joe said and placed a passionate kiss on my lips, i wrapped my hands around his neck and hung on to him, not wanting him to leave. “baby i’ll be right back” he pulled away from the kiss.

i let go of him and he walked to the car, i closed the front door and walked into our living room, clicking through peacock before settling on my personal favorite, harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban.

i paused it before it could even start, scrolling through my phone as i waited for joe to come back home. i got bored so i decide to get out the book i’ve been reading.-hunting adeline by H.D Carlton-i relaxed into the corner of the couch, flipping the pages as i read through them.

when the food arrived i grabbed it, thanked and tipped the man before going back into the living room, i set the food down and waited for joe to come back home.

this week has just not been my week, earlier this week joe and i had gotten into an argument, he did something i didn’t like with jagger, my son, when we were fighting i called jagger “my son” and let’s just say joe didn’t like that, but he understood after everything jag has been through he knows i’m overprotective of him.

tonight jagger was with my mom and stepfather, they wanted to see him, i don’t let him go off a lot without me for a few reasons, one he’s only four, two i’m overprotective, three i can’t trust anyone with him.

sooner or later joe came back, he walked in with a basket full of my favorite snacks, a sprite, and some roses, i slightly smiled and got up to go over to him.

before i could even get around the couch he was already at me, putting his long legs to use, “here, these are for you, mama” he kissed my head and sat down i sat beside him cuddling into him.

“i’m sorry” i told him, he sent me a confused look but this is something i need to talk to him about.

“for what baby ?”

“the other day, you know how i am with jag, and i don’t want you to just leave or hurt hi-hurt us” i sat up straight and looked at him trying to read his body language.

“i wouldn’t be here if i planned on hurting either one of y’all, there wouldn’t be a ring on your finger if i planned on leaving, it just hurt a little hearing you call him your son as if i don’t do anything for him” he said his face becoming unreadable.

“i’m sorry” my eyes met his once again before he pulled my head to his chest, he stood up, still holding me and sat in the corner of the couch, i cuddled into his side even more.

“i love you charleigh” his index finger arched under my chin and lifted my head to his view.

“promise ?” i asked him.

“i pinky promise” he stuck his pinky out and interlinked it with my own, i smiled and kissed his cheek, for the rest of the night we sat there, sitting right next to each other, my head rested on his shoulder, watching the movie, eating, and talking every now and then.

“one last thing then we can put this away, okay ?” i said to him, he nodded and put his full attention on me. “do you want to adopt jagger ?” i questioned him, my eyes brimming with tears at the thought.

joe was speechless, his eyes also starting to tear up, i didn’t know if it was a good or bad thing “if you don’t want to it’s fine” i fidgeted with my fingers looking down at my bare feet.

his hand grabbed onto my foot as he began to speak “no. i want to, i wouldn’t want nothing else” the tears in both of our eyes finally falling, i wiped his cheeks as he wiped mine, laughing a little before pulling his head in and placing my lips to his.

[captain039]

PART 8

The lords servant

Astarion x reader

Warnings: plus size reader, light swearing, vampire things, sexual, first times, smut, harassment, sexual harassment, angst, slowburnn, oral f receiving

Previous part <-

Smut!

Morn came and you felt rather woozy, you didn’t want to get up and be awake. You certainly wouldn’t go out again that’s for sure, not after that Bastard. You had to get up though, lying here wouldn’t do any good. You dressed and age before cleaning your room despite it not needing to be cleaned, you needed to do something to keep your mind entertained. The day went by slowly you stayed in your room mostly, by dinner you were ready for bed till you were summoned. Daenan had stopped you in the hall as you were heading back to your room saying the lord needed to see you, you agreed heading there with nerves in your stomach. You knocked listening to the ‘come in’ he said and opened the door. You headed inside keeping your head down and closing the door again.

“You wished to-“ before you could finish you felt lips on yours, desperate. You made a confused noise before your body gave in and you closed your eyes. Your lord pressed you against the door, hands going to your sides, gripping your hips.

“My lord-“ you said brokenly between the kiss, but he didn’t listen.

“Astarion” you said quietly and he stopped, it’d been the first time you said his name alone. He sagged against you head on your shoulder and you felt your heart break, you gently ran your fingers through his hair and rubbed his back, he smelt like wine, could vampires get drunk? You glanced to the table, three empty bottles, well that explains it.

“What’s the matter?” You asked softly feeling his body tremble slightly.

“Has something happened?” You added but got no answer, you hoped there was no real danger involved, he just needed a comforting touch. He smelt though, awfully strange for him, had he not bathed last night? He smelt like wine and dead rats? Gods what was that.

“My lord I think you should have a bath, it’ll sooth your body” you suggested, but he didn’t move from your shoulder.

“Astarion” you whispered gently lifting his head, his eyes looked dull and hallowed, his cheeks lost their light redness they had. You cupped his face and stroked his cheek with a soft sigh. You pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“Come on” you said softly as he followed you to his bathroom. You started the bath opening his cabinet finding many oils and soaps, you faltered over then, reading the different smells for going with something earthy. You poured some in the bath watching it cloud and bubble lightly. You had sat Astarion on the seat in his bathroom, he looked like a kicked puppy, it broke your heart.

“You’ll need to undress” you said as he just looked at the bath. You sighed softly going closer, hands hesitating at his buttons. You undid his shirt and slid off seeing the lean muscles he had, you suppose for two hundreds years you’d need to be fit, living in the shadows.

“Astarion” you said and he finally looked to you some cloud leaving them.

“Hm?” He said as you nodded to his pants.

“Oh” he muttered standing up and unbuttoning them. You turned around to give him privacy as you turned off the water. You waited a bit before you heard him enter the bath and turned around again. You smiled softly, nodding your head before going back to the cabinet. You grabbed a small container and a hair oil before kneeling by the bath, you froze slightly seeing scars jaggered into his back, something done on purpose.

“I can wash my hair” he defended and you flinched slightly at his tone.

“My lord- just, let me” you said as he scolded but nodded, what was going on with him. You filled the container with water before gently touching his head.

“Lean back” you said and he did. You wet his hair before ringing it out slightly making sure nothing went in his face before getting him to sit up again. You put some oil on your hands before rubbing them together then to his hair. You gently massaged it into his scalp seeing his eyes flutter close and a soft satisfied moan leaving his mouth. You smiled briefly making sure you lathered his hair before washing your hands off and picking up the container.

“Lean back again” you said and he did. You washed his hair out making sure no suds remained, the oil made his hair extra soft, how he liked it you assumed. You let him sit up and grabbed a sponge next dampening it in the water before going to wash his arms. He frowned at you and you hesitated slightly before washing his arms and around his shoulders, before going to his chest. He truely had a beautiful form, it matched his face perfectly, you shook those thoughts from your head though as you ran the sponge over his upper chest. You felt his eyes on you the whole time and you felt your body go hot. You sat back on your heels embarrassed before a wet hand cupped your cheek. Your eyes snapped to his giving him a small smile. He didn’t return it though, just looked over your face, going over every detail of it before he pulled you close and kissed you. It wasn’t as desperate as last time, it was slow and warm. You hummed clenching the sponge against the edge of the bath where your hands lay, water spilling over the edge. You didn’t care though feeling your pants get wet, you just leaned into him more.

“I want you” he muttered against your lips and your body tensed as you pulled back.

“You have me” you said quietly as you stood, put the sponge down and grabbed his towel. He stood as well, the water moving with him, you kept your eyes away as he took the towel and dried himself. You drained the bath going to put the oils away till a hand tugged you.

“Cleaning can wait” he said and you stuttered going to say it will only take a second, but let him pull you to him. He had discarded his towel on the floor as he tugged you close, your hands resting on his chest so you didn’t trip. You kept your eyes on his upper chest, feeling your body grow warm, you saw two puncture holes like the ones in your wrist, only more prominent. You looked to him again and he took the chance to kiss you. His hands held your waist as you closed your eyes again. You felt a very faint heart beat in his chest making you frown slightly.

“I still have a heart” he whispered and you froze.

“I didn’t mean-“ you stuttered and he smiled kissing you again.

“I’m not a full vampire” he explained and you frowned.

“Merely a vampire spawn” he added a small sneer on his face.

“I don’t know what that means” you muttered a little embarrassed as his smile returned.

“I have a vampire master, the one who made me, turned me into this” he made a disgusted face.

“You didn’t choose?” You asked and he scoffed.

“Who would choose this?” He said sternly and you winced.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know” you said ashamed and looked away.

“No, I’m sorry, again” he sighed his forehead pressing against yours.

“I was beaten up on the street, left for dead when I was offered a new life for eternity, my master took all my blood that I had left, killed me and turned me, when I woke up I had to claw my way through six feet of dirt” your heart shattered at his words as you felt tears in your eyes.

“I somehow escaped him and his claws, I found home here in Baldurs gate, made a name for myself, made lots of gold” he scoffed lightly lifting his head from yours. You were crying, you hadn’t meant to, it made him frown.

“Why’re you crying?” He asked as you sniffled and wiped your eyes.

“I’m sorry, I, it’s horrible what you went through, I’m sorry I press so much about it, I didn’t realise how much you went through” you said trying to stop your tears as he looked surprised.

“Sweet thing” he muttered as you scoffed lightly wiping your eyes again.

“I complain about my past” you huffed at yourself.

“Just because it’s different doesn’t mean it wasn’t worse” he said and you looked to him.

“As much as I enjoy talking, I meant what I said” he said eyes darkening.

“I want you” he murmured, heat going straight through your body.

“You have me” you said a little nervous.

“Not yet” he whispered pressing his lips to yours more desperately this time. You gave in, pressing yourself against him, hands on his chest again. His hands trailed to the hem of your shirt, tugging gently before he pulled back. You hesitated before lifting your arms up, he lifted your shirt up and over your head before dropping it in the floor. You instantly went to hide your stomach, at least your bra covered your top. He kissed you again, his hands holding your wrists gently and pulling them away from your body. He made you put your hands back on his chest while his untied your bra, you pulled back from the kiss again feeling nerves get a hold of you.

“You’re breathtaking in every way” he whispered pressing his lips to your neck making you sigh and tilt your head. He slipped off your bra while he kept kissing your neck. His hands rested on your sides before they slid up, you tensed a bit, but his hands just went back down to holding your hips, pulling them against his. You didn’t realise he’d gotten aroused in that time, you felt him hard between your body’s and your cheeks went hot. You were unsure as to what to do with your hands, never having touched a person before like this.

“You can touch, explore, I won’t bite unless asked” he teased nibbling your ear gently making you let out a surprised sound. He grinned against your neck continuing to kiss it. You moved your hands across his chest, around his shoulders and up his neck. He hummed against your own neck as you continued feeling him. He was smooth, only hair was on his head, still damp from the bath, he looked funny without it all curled and fluffed up, it made you giggle softly.

“What?” He asked pulling back with a smirk.

“Your hair” you smiled and he pouted.

“What about it?” He huffed and you laughed softly.

“Nothing” you shook your head grinning while he huffed.

“Cheeky pup” he muttered and kissed you again making you moan suddenly. His hands went to your pants, unbuttoning the front slowly. You expected him to shimmy them down, but you felt his hand go under your under wear and downward. Your body tensed before you whined against his lips as he dragged a finger through your folds. He growled then, feeling you, you grew embarrassed instantly.

“I can’t wait to taste you” he whispered breathlessly and you frowned slightly not understanding, before it clicked, he wanted-? On you-? Gods. His finger continued slow strokes making you jolt slightly when he ran his finger over your clit after every pass. You huffed gently against his lips feeling like your clothes were suffocating you.

“Impatient?” He grinned pulling back and you flushed looking away as his hand left your pants and gripped their hem.

“Cute” he said as he tugged down your pants and underwear before you shimmed and stepped out of them. He looked at you, eyes trailing down your body, you wanted to cover yourself quickly, but he was quick to tug you against him and kiss you quickly. You gasped softly finally feeling his cool frame against your whole body. He lead you over to the bed pulling back from the kiss and smirking. You gazed at him as he gently gave your shoulders a gentle push. You landed on the bed with a soft Oof, before you shuffled back slightly and he crawled over you. His lips met yours and his hips ground down into your body, you moaned softly against his lips, hands holding his biceps. The kiss was short as he kissed down your neck and upper chest before shuffling down the bed. He kissed your thigh next eyes on you intently before he pushed your knees open. You looked away embarrassed and put an arm over your eyes as you held your breath. The gasp that left you was quick and loud as a tongue went through your folds. You moaned biting the inside of your cheek as he began to eat you out. Your legs jolted every time he hit a sensitive spot which was everywhere. He hooked your legs over his shoulders and held you still making you whine. You began to pant as he continued, low groans leaving his mouth every once in a while. You gripped the sheets under you, back arching before he stopped. The whine that left you made you feel pathetic, your arm moving away from your eyes so you could see him as he panted and smirked. He licked his lips before wiping his mouth and crawled back up your body.

“Delicious” he muttered kissing you roughly. You moaned tasting yourself on his tongue, the feeling strange. His hips moved against yours gently before his hand went between your body’s again. Your mouth opened with a gasp as his finger pressed against your entrance and slowly slid it, his tongue going to tangle with yours as he did. The feeling was odd, but not unpleasant, different when someone else did it. He slowly moved his finger in and out your hips slowly moving to meet his movements. He smiled against your lips as he added a second finger. You felt the stretch this time, brow furrowing slightly at the intrusion.

“Relax” he whispered against your lips as he kissed down your jaw and to your neck again. You did the best you could to relax as he slowly moved his fingers and spread them. You moaned quietly as his thumb pressed against your clit and moved slowly. He set a pace, enough for you to feel the coil in your stomach. You were moaning quietly with every breath, unable to get words out as he sucked along your neck. You gripped his arm feeling him grin against you before he lifted his head and removed his fingers.

“Are you ready?” He asked your eyes fluttering open and your head nodding.

“I need you to relax” he said pressing soft kisses on your face. You nodded letting your legs relax and your body. You glanced down seeing him giving himself a few slow pumps making you flush before he lined himself up. You held his arm nervously, fingers clenching. He moved his arm though and you frowned as he moved to hold your hand is his. You looked to him, giving him a small nod as he pressed against you. You clenched his hand tightly as he slid in. You whimpered at the stretch while he moaned above you. You felt tears sting your eyes as they rolled down your face, your lord quickly kissing them away.

“Breathe” he said and you realised you were holding your breath. You panted softly as the sting died down a little as you finally relaxed.

“Good pup” he whispered making you flush. He allowed you to adjust before you nodded with a small hum. His hips slowly moved back then forward, you closed your eyes trying to relax your body so it didn’t sting as much.

“It gets better I promise” he whispered, kissing your cheek and you trusted him with a nod. You kept a hold of his hand as he set a slow pace, the sting leaving and small pleasure replacing it. Your face wasn’t scrunched up anymore as he sped up and your breathing quickened.

“So good” he said breathlessly as you moaned softly. Your hips met his without you realising, the feeling making your stomach coil again, you needed something more though. You didn’t know what though, to afraid to ask.

“What’s wrong little pup?” He asked slowing down slightly.

“More” you whispered opening your eyes and he grinned.

“Of course” he said hips moving rather harshly into yours. You moaned eyes rolling into your head again as he quickened his pace. You felt his hand between your body’s again and moaned loudly as his fingers went to your clit. this is what you needed. Your back arched and you clenched his hand and the sheet as he began to rub quicker. You moaned out his name brokenly, hearing him groan softly in response as your stomach tightened. You felt your breath hitch and your back arch as you came. Your body shook with a broken moan as he rode out your high. His hips began to stutter as he mouthed around your neck.

“You can bite me” you whispered and his hips snapped into yours. He growled against your neck hips stuttering more as he bit down and came. You cried softly feeling the shards of ice going through your neck before it numbly throbbed. His hips still moved slowly as he began to feed. He held you tightly, greedily drinking you before you gave a weak moan. He pulled back panting harshly as he slipped free. He licked the wound muttering small praises as your head spun slightly. You were in a daze as he panted above you stood. You frowned making a small whine of complain and he chuckled dampening a cloth and coming back. He cleaned you up, from the blood on your neck to the come dripping from your entrance. You shuddered when he cleaned you, your body over sensitive before he cleaned himself and threw the cloth away.

“Stay?” You said thinking he wouldn’t as he stopped by his desk briefly as you admired his body.

“I’m not going anywhere sweet thing” he said turning and walking back to you.

Next part ->

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[flowersandbigteeth]

Can we have some more omegaverse stuff pretty please? (⁠◕⁠દ⁠◕⁠)

This is sfw, but just an idea I had rolling around in my head...the last one was a little alpha dom heavy, so this one is a little omega dom heavy

Alpha (Jagger) x tough omega female

Word Count: 2.5k

W: omegaverse fluff, threats and descriptions of violence, implication of nsfw at the end, but sfw

“I’d point your nose in another direction if I were you, alpha,” you said, cocking the shotgun you’d bought specifically with rounds that would take down an alpha for this reason. It was also the reason you lived in this far out location, in a cabin in the woods, away from people and anyone who could give you up to someone who would try to take you captive. You were an omega, but you weren’t just going to be someone’s pet. 

The blonde alpha limping up to your porch covered in blood panted a little and leaned on his knee at the base of your porch. Your five bull mastiffs, Biscuit, Waffle, Cake, Toast, and Cookie were barking their heads off but staying where they were trained to stand in front of you. 

“Come on doll face,” he said, flashing you a smile, surprising for his condition, “can’t I come in for just a minute for a cuppa water? I’m a little outta sorts here.” 

A red trail followed behind him. You clenched your jaw and shook your head.

“Stay right there,” you said, “the dogs are trained to maul you if you move after I turn my back.” 

His eyes got wide, looking at them and he nodded. You hurried inside and gathered some of your precious medical supplies. You weren’t cruel, you weren’t going to leave him to die, but you were sure as hell not letting him in your house. The last thing you needed was alpha pheromones fucking your head all up. 

When you got back outside he looked a lot paler, the pool of blood around him growing. The dogs were getting triggered by the blood, starting to tap their paws. 

“Sit! Stay!” you told them and they obediently stopped barking and sat at attention, watching you for your next command. 

You groaned as, with a massive thunk, the fucking alpha collapsed on your front lawn. 

“Motherfucker,” you cursed, dropping your shotgun against the side of your house. 

The guy had to weigh 500 lbs, so when you’d patched up the deep wounds riddling his body, all you could do was use your truck to drag him into your barn. Your lady goats that were milked and in their pens for the night didn’t like his intrusion anymore than you did, bleating their displeasure.

“Chill out girls,” you hollered at them, not that it helped any, “he’ll probably be dead in the mornin’.” 

His presence worried you. Two people knew you were out there, the omega butcher you sold the goats and milk to and her alpha mate. You didn’t believe they would give you up, but without asking him you couldn’t explain the alpha’s presence here or why he was all cut up.

Whoever had worked him over was having fun with him. They weren’t jagged, random wounds from a fight. The cuts were clean and precise, in places that would bleed heavily but not immediately kill him, the worst ones right across his cheeks, marring his pretty face. You were starting to think he’d been dumped out here to die.

While you looked at him passed out in the hay, you couldn’t help but notice how pretty he was for an alpha. Most of them looked like monsters with giant teeth and wide jaws, but this one had more of a pretty look to him, even though his jaw was still wide. His lashes were long and his lips had a nice bow, like a young Vincent Price. You wondered if the two nasty slices running diagonally across his cheeks to take up the most space possible had anything to do with that. Seemed maybe a little intentional. 

You tried to sleep in your own bed after the sun set and you’d eaten dinner, but you were too anxious, wondering about the alpha. What if he died? What if he lived? What were you going to do with his body? Drag it out to the road and dump it? It’d take you days to dig a six foot hole big enough to bury him. The morbid thoughts kept you up and you found yourself in the barn with your shotgun at your side watching him. 

He was still breathing and he stayed like that for the next day and the next. Each night you set yourself up on a barrel of hay and fell asleep watching him with your gun at your side and the dogs piled around you. 

The third day you woke to the dogs growling and you instinctively snatched your gun and cocked it, aiming at the alpha who was sitting up on his elbows smiling at you. 

“Morning doll face,” he said grinning, “looks like I lived motherfuckers! Hahaha! Cock suckers can’t kill me! Jagger’s back from the graaaaave!” 

You had no idea what he was so happy about, he looked like shit. You’d cleaned the blood off of him, but he had hay stuck all over him and his face was half stitches. 

“How are you smiling right now?” you asked. 

He grinned even wider which had to hurt.

“I’m lookin’ at the prettiest face I’ve ever seen, babydoll,” he said, “I’ve never been happier to be breathing!” 

You blinked at him, for once, unsure what to say. Your cheeks warmed just a bit and you shrugged your shoulders, trying to brush it off. 

“What’s your name, alpha?” you barked. 

“Jagger,” he said, “what about you?” 

“You don’t need to know,” you said, “you’re not stayin’. When you can walk you’re carryin’ your ass outta here.” 

He put up a hand, schooling his features. 

“Yeah, okay. The pretty lady with the gun is the boss, I get it,” he said, “you got any food around here?” 

He glanced at the goats.

“Preferably not still moving,” he said, frowning at them. 

“Watch him,” you told the dogs and they took the stance they’d been taught, eyes laser focused on their target. If he moved, they attacked. That’s what you’d trained them to do. 

“Motherfucker!” you growled as you carried a bag of food back to the barn. 

All five of your vicious dogs, who could and had mauled and killed two alphas before you’d moved out here, were belly up around the alpha getting pets. 

“Hey! Attention!” you snapped at the dogs and they reluctantly hopped up, sitting dopily next to him with their tongues hanging out. 

���What’d you do to my dogs?!” you snapped. 

He smirked and shrugged. 

“Everyone loves me,” he said, “it’s a curse, honestly.” 

You rolled your eyes back in your head and counted to five. 

“I brought you food,” you hissed, tossing him the bag, “and obviously somebody doesn’t like you very much. Wanna tell me why you’re half butchered?” 

“Mmm,” he nodded, as he shoved the sandwich in his mouth and chewed. 

“It was all a big misunderstanding,” he said, “I had a very brief, but fiery relationship with an elegant woman and when I happened to be out of town with some of her belongings, she misinterpreted the situation and thought I seduced her and robbed her.” 

You raised an eyebrow. 

“Which you didn’t do,” you said. 

He shrugged. 

“It’s really a matter of perspective,” he said, “it was a torrid love affair and she said what was her’s was mine…so…I took her word for it!” 

“What belongings, exactly?” she asked. 

“Nothing special…just some baubles…jewelry and the like…I think she was a bit more upset at how our relationship ended than exactly what I took. When she found me I happened to be with another woman…for purely platonic reasons. She didn’t see it that way.” 

You rolled your eyes. So he was a con man. 

“So she had you sliced up and tossed in the woods to die, huh? Sounds like a lovely lady,” you said. 

He shrugged. 

“Well she didn’t cut off my cock,” he said, leaning back on his elbow, his blue eyes sparkling at you, “so it’s not that bad, really.” 

You shook your head at him. 

“Look, I don’t like people knowin’ I’m out here, so when you go, keep it to yourself, alright?” you asked, “if I see you again, I’ll shoot you on sight.” 

He smirked at you and pet one of your dogs. 

“But the pups would be so upset,” he said, “they like me.” 

You rolled your eyes, and called your dogs to you. 

“I’ve got things to do,” you said, “stay here.” 

“Wouldn’t want to be anywhere else, babydoll,” he said, putting arms behind his head and laying back in the hay. 

—

Click. Click. 

You pulled the pieces of your gun apart as you cleaned and oiled them, your legs hanging off of your back porch. 

“Even when the sky comes falling, even when the sun don’t shine, I got faith in you and I so put your pretty little hand in mine!” you sang to it.  

“Do you really sing to your gun? You’re too pretty to be lonely, doll.” 

You jumped a foot into the air and spun around to find the alpha behind you. 

“Anybody ever tell you not to sneak up on somebody holding a gun?” you snorted, catching your breath. 

“If you can assemble that fast enough to get me before I get you, I deserve to die,” he chuckled, sitting down next to you. 

“I thought I told you to stay in the barn,” you grunted, putting your gun back together quickly and loading it. 

“Wanted to see if you needed help with anything. Should probably pull my weight if I’m gonna stick around here,” he said. 

You frowned. 

“You’re not staying here,” you said. 

“No?” he asked, looking at your five dogs, totally not trying to intimidate him at all, playing on the lawn, “dogs like me. You like me. Don’t see why I can’t.” 

“I don’t like you,” you pointed out, “you’re a con man and I’m going to shoot you.” 

He shrugged. 

“Can’t be worse than my last girlfriend. At this point a clean shot is probably better than getting sliced and diced,” he grinned at you, “and you do like me, I can smell you.” 

You knew you were putting off omega pheromones. That’s why you’d wanted him to stay in the barn, away from you. 

You lifted your head as your dogs drew to attention. Someone was approaching your farm. 

“Stay behind me,” you snapped at the alpha as you followed your dogs to the front lawn, where you found a beautiful, tall woman exiting an expensive car. 

You raised your gun and your dogs formed a defensive line. 

“Who are you?” you snapped, “this is private property! No trespassers!” 

She scoffed, glancing behind you at your alpha companion. 

“Jagger!” she crooned, “there you are! I was worried you’d died or something. I didn’t find you where I left you…have you learned your lesson? Ready to come back home?” 

A snarl escaped your lips as the omega part of your brain, drenched in Jagger’s pheromones went nuts. Your body was already attaching yourself to him, drawing the two of you together. You instinctively cocked your gun. 

“I told you, no trespassers, lady,” you snapped, “you’ve got five seconds before I start shooting.” 

She frowned, her eyes focusing on you. 

“I’m here for my boyfriend,” the beta woman hissed. 

“You cut all your boyfriends up?” you asked. 

She snorted. 

“Only when they misbehave,” she said innocently. 

“Well you dumped him on my property, so he’s mine now,” you told her in no uncertain terms, kicking yourself even as the words left your lips. 

Behind you Jagger made a noise of approval. 

Underneath your clothes, your skin was starting to burn as Jagger’s pheromones sank into it. As annoying as the sensation was, you were getting more and more agitated. Your omega instincts offended that she was trying to approach your alpha. 

You knew wealthy beta women like her liked to keep the strapping alphas as pets…as long as they could manage to and the thought enraged you. 

“Jagger…” she hummed, turning her attention back to him, “you and I both know you’re not going to stay here with this…farm girl…you have expensive tastes. Let’s get you cleaned up and into a proper set of clothes…” 

Without another word you fired a warning shot close to her feet and she jumped. 

“Your five seconds are up,” you snarled. 

She glared at you, refusing to move. 

“You don’t want him,” she spat, “he’s sneaky…don’t you want to know why he got his punishment in the first place? He needs to be kept on a short leash.” 

“Don’t care,” you said, firing another shot to the other side of her, careful to miss her tires so she could hurry up and go, “find yourself another toy.” 

She huffed, angry she wasn’t gaining any ground. 

“Fine!” she hissed, “keep him! He’ll run out on you just like he ran out on me!” 

She gave you the finger before she got into her car and peeled off, kicking up a cloud of dust behind her. 

By this point your need for your alpha was making your mind hazy. You knew you weren’t thinking straight, but your biology couldn’t be denied. The damn woman had sent your whole body into a state of frantic need. 

“That was amazing!” he beamed at you, his eyes filled with stars, “I’ve never seen anyone talk to her like that before!” 

Your eyes locked onto him and you swung your gun around to him and his hands shot up, the look on his face draining to concern. 

“Strip!” you growled, “and then go inside!” 

His eyes got wide and he hurriedly took off his clothes. 

You marched him into your bedroom and nudged him onto your bed with the barrel of your gun. 

“You’re mine now, alpha, you do what I say when I say it,” you snarled, “run out on me like you ran out on her once I've taken your bite, I won’t bother cutting you up…it’ll be a bullet to the brain. Got me?” 

He blinked at you and a smile formed on his lips as he leaned back on the bed. Jagger had no intention of ever leaving you. You were the most impressive little omega he’d ever come across. He was in love. 

“Yes ma’am,” he agreed, his eyes practically forming hearts. You couldn’t help but notice his rather large cock was growing. 

“Good,” you snapped, dropping the gun, stripping off your own clothes, and stalking across the room to do exactly what alphas and omegas were made for.

[cantcompetewhereudontcompare]

Louis - the Liam Gallagher cosplayer

I said my next project would be Louis as a homophobic bully - with proof. But the hard proof I have is in a hard drive I can't access right now, so I'll leave that for later (but it is coming as soon as I can).

I thought instead I'd tackle a huge thing that's been bothering me, especially in light of the Oasis reunion.

I'm personally a huge fan of Oasis, and everything about Louis regarding Oasis annoys me, but particularly these two things:

He's not an actual fan and never was. Just a casual listener who's marketing himself a certain way to appeal to a certain audience

He's attempting (rather embarrassingly) to be a copy-paste version of Liam Gallagher

I'll divide this into two parts, and this first post will be about point #1, because it'll be too long otherwise.

Anyone who was a fan of One Direction in their early days would know that Louis' Thing, the music he said he enjoyed, was Top 40 radio. He can act like he's an indie rock band enthusiast all he wants, but that's just simply not true. In fact, that was HARRY'S thing throughout his time in the band.

Fans called him a hipster (the whole Frat Harry thing came later, at the time, in 2013, fans said he was a hipster). And Louis LITERALLY mocked him for liking "obscure" bands.

Here, March 13 2013, One Direction's Take Me Home Tour in Dublin. They read Twitter questions and answered them on stage. The question was "What's the number one song played on your iPod?" and Louis introduces the question to Harry with "Harry, got any indie bands we haven't heard of?"

Here's the video. The question is at 2:06, first he talks to Zayn, then Niall, then at 2:36 to Harry.

This isn't a one-time incident, but it's one I distinctly remember (because I went to multiple shows of that tour and followed it closely!) and can physically point out. It happened multiple times. It was a Thing Louis mocked him about constantly. Keep in mind, Louis was 21 when this happened, a fully developed grown adult who had been in the industry for three years and was a professional musician.

Why do I say this? Does it bother me that he mocked Harry? No, that's just banter lmao. But what bothers me is that a few years later, he would rebrand as someone who enjoyed indie music, as an indie musician himself, who enjoyed and propped up unknown bands. And his fans would act like Harry was the popstar who made and enjoyed shallow music and Louis was a rock connoisseur all along.

At 21 Louis... distinctly wasn't that person - he also wasn't that person at 22, or 23, or 24, he started being that person in 2017, when he decided to craft his entire persona around being a Donny chav who gave you a two-finger salute and wore trackies to red carpet events.

Louis didn't even try to act like his musical style was indie rock back then. in the early 2010s there was a type of social media called Ping where you could log in songs that you liked. It was connected to your Twitter account and your iTunes account. Because in late 2012 (Louis was almost 21, might I add), it was about to shut down, a fan (a Larrie) documented the whole thing in screenshots. Here's the post. Of course they make everything about their conspiracy, but the account was legit (connected to his verified Twitter account) and the post made the rounds on normal Tumblr, so I remember seeing it at the time and saving it because it was interesting.

Some of the songs that he added to his Ping:

Thinking of You, Part of Me, Wide Awake, and the entire Teenage Dream album by Katy Perry

Talking to the Moon by Bruno Mars

Look After You by The Fray

Someone Like You by Adele

Far Away by Nickelback (he got this as a tattoo lol)

Who Knew by Pink

Bedshaped by Keane

I'm With You Avril Lavigne

Take Care by Drake

Yellow, Shiver, Talk, Fix You by Coldplay

Moves Like Jagger and Payphone by Maroon 5

It Girl by Jason Derulo

Without You by David Guetta & Usher

Love Story and We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together by Taylor Swift

Domino by Jessie J

Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol

Goodbye My Lover by James Blunt

Titanium by Sia and David Guetta

Somebody That I Used to Know by Gotye

Turn Up The Music by Chris Brown

Let's Go by Calvin Harris

Mr. Brightside and Somebody Told Me by The Killers

We Are Young by Fun.

Stop And Stare by OneRepublic

She Moves In Her Own Way by The Kooks

Basket Case and Wake Me Up When September Ends by Green Day

Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepsen

I Miss You by Blink 182

Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous by Good Charlotte

Bright Lights (the album) by Ellie Goulding

Believe (the album) by Justin Bieber

Naive by Lily Allen

Imagine by John Lennon

How We Do (Party) by Rita Ora

All of these songs are heavy rotation radio hits. I'm not sure how many people will see this post, if any, but if it happens upon any young Gen Z or Gen Alpha eyes, who happen to not know some of these, they're literally just... the most played songs on the radio at the time, and Imagine by John Lennon (which was the only song older than 2000 in his entire Ping).

The only bands he has on this entire log, are Two Door Cinema Club, who you might say "oh wait, that's indie isn't it?" except they reached #2 in the UK albums chart in 2012, when this log happened. Literally following trends once again. Same thing goes for Owl City, it's a somewhat indie project, but they had a big hit (certified Diamond and hit #1 in the UK and the US), Louis logged in the project immediately after this song made it big. A bunch of John Mayer songs, who in 2012 was hyper-mainstream. Or the #1 album Coexist by The XX. And songs from the #1 album in the UK Contrast, by Conor Maynard. That plus the incredibly mainstream hits by some more rockish bands (I'm surprised he didn't log in American Idiot by Green Day) and pop. That's it.

What about Oasis? It's there.

Stop The Clocks - a greatest hits record.

Stop Crying Your Heart out - literally the #3 most popular song of theirs on Spotify

Little By Little - a huge hit off one of their latest albums (33 million YouTube Views, 85 million Spotify plays)

I'm sure he enjoyed himself some Oasis. He was a British boy growing up in the late 90s and early 2000s. It'd be weird if he didn't. But he never talked about going to see them growing up (he was 16 when they played in England for the last time). He logged in just one album, and it was a greatest hits. He logged in two songs, and they were both huge hits. He logged in a ton of songs by Coldplay, or Katy Perry. Hell, he has more songs logged in for DRAKE than Oasis.

It's obviously not definite proof, but he had that Ping account for two years, and all his iTunes purchases or likes showed up. I also don't remember him mentioning them in any particular way throughout his time in the band. Nor him mentioning going to see them. Or wearing their merch. Or...

Despite both Liam and Noel having a Twitter account as far back as 2009/2010, Louis didn't follow either of them until 2017

So that in and of itself is bizarre for someone who in 2017 would give a million different interviews specifically mentioning Oasis and Liam Gallagher, right?

But the most egregious part of his pretend act, is that he's just flat out wrong about Oasis in and of itself.

First of all, in every single interview he mentions Oasis, he singles out Liam Gallagher. You can look it up, because frankly, there's so many interviews where he does this that I could probably be here forever. He talks about Liam Gallagher so much it's almost obnoxious (and we'll get on to that in part 2), but he almost never talks about Noel. Who he mentions is Liam. Even though he says Oasis was a huge part of his inspiration as an artist, who he mentions is Liam. And this is in the context of Oasis, as a band who inspired him growing up, not Liam Gallagher as a solo artist. OASIS. Liam.

To the uninitiated on Oasis, Liam is my favorite because he's great. He's funny, he's charming, he has a distinct voice that makes Oasis stand out. He's a mean tambourine player. But to name Liam as your inspiration when you admire Oasis, as a musician, is akin to doing that with Ringo and The Beatles.

Just so we're clear, this is the writing credits for their debut album:

Their second album

Third album

Shall I go on?

Liam doesn't play instruments, except the maracas or the aforementioned tambourine. Noel:

Just:

You have to actively ignore everything about the band to pretend that your inspiration, musically, as a musician, is LIAM GALLAGHER if you actively like Oasis. What the hell are we talking about?

To be clear, Louis didn't say in these interviews that he admired Liam's vocals (which he could never in a million years imitate, and I beg him not to try), or attitude, or charisma, or fucking tambourine expertise. He talked about lyrics, and music, and songwriting. And yet, he never mentioned Noel Gallagher. IN THE CONTEXT OF TALKING ABOUT OASIS.

Listen, I fucking hate Noel Gallagher. He's a c*nt. But I happen to like Oasis, and I know, despite how much I despise him, that Oasis wouldn't exist without him.

So why did Louis mention Liam??? Well, two main reasons.

His fans don't give a fuck. They don't care about his musical opinions because they're not fans of his music or him as a musician. It's why they don't listen to it. They're fans of his status as a purported underdog or the conspiracy theories surrounding him, or rate him as a part of the band they once liked. Some of them pity follow him. He could say his musical inspiration is Miley Cyrus because of how well she plays banjo and it'd make absolutely no difference for them. Also, most of them are musically illiterate and would find a way to justify anything he says, despite being completely nonsensical, if they even listen to him in the first place.

Because of #1, Louis has been on a quest to capture a specific type of audience. He tried to capture the 1D audience with Just Hold On and Back To You (which are songs that are actually up his alley in terms of the music he consumed). But despite being his best commercially performing songs, they failed to actually and significantly move the needle. And he saw the writing on the wall even in the middle of promo for Back To You. Which is why he gave up trying to be commercially successful with that crowd and has been relentlessly trying to shift his audience.

It's why he wears sweatpants and sneakers everywhere, why he called himself a chav in 2017/2018, why the horrible haircuts, why the constant smoking and drinking in promo pics, why the pivot to "actually, I'm a die hard indie enthusiast" even though four years prior he mocked his bandmate for that exact musical taste. It's why he markets his own music as indie, rock, etc, even though it's decidedly not. It's why he does the photoshoots he does, hires the people he hires, and has the bands he has in his narcissistic "festival."

It's put-up on. I suspect it's partially borne out of deep insecurity and wanting to appeal to the type of guy he went to school with. I think his mates, despite enjoying the wealth of 1D's success, took the piss out of him for being in a boyband. This is pure speculation, but we're talking about the guys who openly retweet Andrew Tate (Nizam Kabir), or mocked his singing voice in his ex girlfriend's posts...

Let's actually expand on that, Hannah Walker, Louis' ex girlfriend, uploaded a video to her instagram account singing with a sore throat. It was captioned "sore throat singing" and this is what one of his "best friends" from childhood, Calvin Rodgers, commented on it:

This wasn't some gentle banter either, this was around a point in time where Calvin and Louis weren't hanging out (2013/2014). I actually saw Hannah's post and the comments a few years ago, but her account has gone private since.

"Calvin (unprompted) In theory, the singing wasn't AS flat as Louis" another friend (Dan Woollet) replies "Fair point" to which Calvin replies "Not only fair, but true." Hannah replies "controversial."

Louis cheated on Hannah with Eleanor (I can do a deep dive on that later), and at first Hannah didn't know, so she and Louis were on good terms, but she has been openly very negative about Louis ever since late 2011.

Calvin is also a musician, by the way. His comment was fair and true. Louis' singing IS flat. I doubt he'd say that to his face when he's on good terms with him, especially because he greatly benefits from Louis' money and status (his friends have mooched everything from access to events, to paid vacations on yachts by being with him, to outright jobs). But from things Louis has said in interviews, such as "I don't have a skincare routine because my friends would make fun of me" or "if I showed up wearing designer clothes my friends would never let me hear the end of it," it does seem like he has this need to fit in and seek approval from these idiots. I'll never understand it, and I'm not going to try and psychoanalyze him (and he doesn't wanna do therapy because he's too good for therapy anyway), but I think he wouldn't be seeking this audience otherwise.

His attempts have clearly failed. His music is consumed less and less. He's at 2.4 million monthly listeners on Spotify. Just so we're clear, Spotify has a chart of the most monthly listeners per artist, where they chart the first 500 artists from 1 to 500. #1 currently is The Weeknd with 107M. #2 is Billie Eilish. Harry is #53 without having released music in 2 and a half years (which is amazing).

The #500 is Lynyrd Skynyrd with 16,147,684 monthly listeners. Louis would have to gain 14 MILLION monthly listeners to be at the bottom of the list. That is SEVEN TIMES the total amount he has right now. That's how bad it is.

His fans don't listen to his music. They're just incredibly annoying online because their idea of stanning him or being his fan is Twitter, and TikTok, and some of them on Tumblr and never shutting up despite having zero actual arguments to back anything up (which is why I'm venting on this blog, and potentially giving Harries tools to shut these idiots up because I know how annoying they are).

I think he's still trying to market himself this way because deep down he still wants the acceptance of his high school buddies and other men like them, and his idea of cool is (deluding himself into believing to) have a career that his buddies would actually respect (as opposed to 1D).

To close off this part of the post, I'll leave with the worst part. How do I know he's not and was never a fan of Oasis? How do I know that he's lying when he says they were his inspiration as an artist?

Well, this:

He said variations of this multiple times in multiple interviews. He bashed metaphors a ton, for instance:

“[So how you classify your genre?] Oh, that’s a big question. Wow, that’s hard. In terms of what I’m looking for from a production point of view, I want things to sound organic and live. Not too many programmed instruments. I want it to feel authentic. From a lyric perspective, almost like indie-pop, very conversational. All these sexy metaphors people put in their music? I ain’t got time for that. I like it straight to the point. It’s hard to classify it as a particular genre.”

Source.

Here's another he gave for MTV:

Though "Back to You" is certifiably pop, Tomlinson grew up loving guitar-based rock bands, he said, and that when it came time to sit down and create solo music of his own, he found inspiration in the acts from his youth: mainly Oasis and Arctic Monkeys, both from Northern England (like Tomlinson). "The way that they write I've always found very interesting because, you know, if you look at a pop song fundamentally, lyrically it's very different to the conversational style that Arctic Monkeys or Oasis might use, and that's exciting to me," Tomlinson said.

All I can say is.. What the actual fuck is he talking about?

Obviously I have a lot more that I can say. But. WHAT?

Let's ignore Arctic Monkeys, because yes, I would absolutely call "honest and to the point" early Arctic Monkeys. Honest meh, because early AM was so conversational and so casual and about such mundane things that honesty wasn't really a factor, but whatever. It was incredibly to the point. BUT OASIS? OASIS??? Honest and to the point? OASIS?? OASIS??

Just so we're clear, the most mainstream song Oasis has ever released is Wonderwall. Everyone knows that song, correct? What the fuck is a wonderwall? That is not A WORD.

The word "wonderwall" came from a George Harrison album. And the lyrics have absolutely nothing to do with it. The song itself is a "Hollywood-esque song" that talks about "some unfathomable crazy love story."

The entire premise of wonderwall is that one person who's always there for you, but told in an abstract metaphorical way. That is by definition the opposite of what Louis said he wanted and liked.

In fact, Oasis FAMOUSLY worship the ground The Beatles walk on. Hell, Liam named his kid fucking LENNON. One of the most known facts about The Beatles was the amount of fucking NONSENSE they wrote in their lyrics. I Am The Walrus?! Like, this is music 101. Louis you are supposed to be a musician (yet play no instruments).

The second most mainstream song by Oasis is Champagne Supernova.

This is a verse from that song:

Wake up the dawn and ask her why A dreamer dreams she never dies Wipe that tear away now from your eye Slowly walking down the hall Faster than a cannonball Where were you while we were gettin' high?

Exactly what part of this is honest and to the point? I thought he hated metaphors?

Remember the songs he Pinged? Let's see those lyrics.

Little By Little

'Cause little by little We gave you everything you ever dreamed of Little by little The wheels of your life have slowly fallen off Little by little You have to give it all in all your life And all the time I just asked myself why, you really here?

I'm gonna go insane. What the fuck did he mean by "honest and to the point" immediately after saying the word "Oasis"? Is he OKAY? Is he having a stroke and smelling colors? How else can he describe this as "honest and to the point"?

The other song was Stop Crying Your Heart Out

Hold up Hold on Don't be scared You'll never change what's been and gone May your smile (May your smile) Shine on (Shine on) Don't be scared (Don't be scared) Your destiny may keep you warm

I'm swimming in directness and honesty here, you guys. I can't believe how to the point these lyrics are! Metaphors? Never knew 'em! Soooo conversational!

But maybe I'm cherry picking songs, and the rest of Oasis' discography actually fits what Louis said, right? RIGHT?!

Let's look at Stop The Clocks, the Greatest Hits album Louis pinged back in 2012. Literally the first verse of the songs in order. Just so we're very clear.

Rock 'N Roll Star

I live my life for the stars that shine People say, "It's just a waste of time" Then they said, "I should feed my head" That to me was just a day in bed I'll take my car and drive real far They're not concerned about the way we are In my mind my dreams are real Now you concerned about the way I feel Tonight I'm a rock 'n' roll star

Some Might Say

Some might say that sunshine follows thunder Go and tell it to the man who cannot shine Some might say that we should never ponder On our thoughts today' cause they hold sway over time

Talk Tonight

Sittin' on my own, chewin' on a bone A thousand million miles from home When something hit me Somewhere right between the eyes Sleepin' on a plane, you know you can't complain You took your last chance once again I landed, stranded Hardly even knew your name

Lyla

Calling all the stars to fall And catch the silver sunlight in your hands Come for me and set me free Lift me up and take me where I stand She believes in everything And everyone and you and yours and mine I waited for a thousand years For you to come and blow me out my mind

The Importance of Being Idle

I sold my soul for the second time 'Cause the man don't pay me I begged my landlord for some more time He said, "Son, the bills are waiting" My best friend called me the other night He said, "Man, are you crazy?" My girlfriend told me to get a life She said, "Boy, you lazy"

Seriously I wanna sit down and ask this man what the hell he was talking about. How can he, with a straight face, say that LIAM GALLAGHER was his musical inspiration growing up because of the lyrics of OASIS, and how straight and to the point, devoid of metaphors, they were. It's the most nonsensical talking point I've ever heard. If he was even remotely relevant the way people would've laughed their head off at him saying this would´ve been diabolical.

He said Oasis and Arctic Monkeys because they fit the persona he wanted to build (even geographically).

There are SO many actual indie bands from up north who write the type of lyrics he claims he likes, but he's too lazy to actually do research into this put-upon image he chose for himself (I hardly think a competent group of people was behind any of it).

He changed his hair, his facial hair, his clothing style, the way he talks, walks, the words he says, how he stands in front of a microphone, his facial expressions, the aesthetic surrounding him, even the people and teams he hired for his career, to cosplay Liam Gallagher. This isn't a case of inspiration. Inspiration is normal. It happens in art every single day. Everything we do is an amalgamation of stuff others have done before. Everything is invented. I want to make it very clear that I don't find any of that problematic in any way.

But Louis is an inch away from wearing the skin of Liam Gallagher as a winter coat. I'll actually dive deep into that in a second part of this post, because it really does go SO deep.

And I sincerely doubt he likes him or his music all that much. He just likes the idea of people viewing him like they view Liam and the "respect" he would get from men.

[slavghoul]

First musical emotion?

TF: I grew up in an environment full of music, with a very open-minded mother who listened to a lot of pop and rock music and, above all, an older brother who was 13 years older than me. That's how much I was immersed in teenage culture as a child. I was 3 years old in 1984 when the glam metal wave invaded the airwaves and TV screens. These bands, like Kiss, WASP or Mötley Crüe, very strong visually for a child, attracted me irresistibly. And let's not forget Twisted Sister. I Wanna Rock is the track that remains the basis, the trigger for everything for me. A song that, at 3, 13, 23 or 43 years old, still has the same effect on me as soon as I hear it: to jump in the air like a madman.

First record bought?

If not Kiss, probably a Rolling Stones album. It didn't make much of an impression on me because my brother used to buy so many of them, so my money was mostly spent on Star Wars stuff. There are tons of bands I love, but I think the Stones are my favourite. Because they embody everything I love about rock, even though they weren't as sophisticated as the Beatles or Pink Floyd. Between 1967 and 1972, in their darkest period, nobody did it better than them: they had the look, the attitude, the style and, on top of that, the songs! Let It Bleed is incredible, with songs like Midnight Rambler and Live With Me. As much as I admire technical singers, virtuosos of harmony, Jagger remains unique. I've never tried to imitate him, but as a performer he is the absolute model.

First concert of note?

My brother used to take me to see local punk bands at a very early age, but I remember B.B. King most of all, when I was about 5 or 6, with my mother. It was a jazz festival, outside in the courtyard of a castle, a very cool atmosphere. As soon as B.B. King started playing, there was electricity in the air. Everyone got up and started dancing, I was blown away. And as I was the only one of my age, I could move around freely, so much so that I found myself in the backstage, in front of B.B. King himself! He invited me into his dressing room: "Do you play the guitar?" - Yes! - so don't stop!" And I took his advice. Even though I sing on stage, the guitar is still my favourite instrument, the one I play and master the most.

The band that best managed to avoid the pitfall of the image taking precedence over the music?

Kiss, unfortunately, was far from being up to the task musically. Alice Cooper, after two minor first albums, went on to make four incredible albums with the original Alice Cooper Group. Above all, he made a phenomenal comeback with Welcome to My Nightmare in 1975. After that, the show took over... The band that managed to stay straight and dignified, without compromising the artistic quality of their work, is undoubtedly Iron Maiden. All of their 80's production is impeccable, and if they had a slump in the 90's, they came back even stronger with the return of Bruce Dickinson, and have been going strong for twenty years! Their work ethic is exemplary. With Ghost, we take up Phantom of the Opera, one of my favourite tracks from their early period, and one of the few where I felt we could add a little something to it.

Best punk song in the world?

There are so many, because I was also brought up on the sounds of the Pistols, the Ramones, the Dead Kennedys... But as a kid, I never got tired of listening to The Great Rock'n'Roll Swindle again, especially the sequence where Sid Vicious sings My Way. His version is one of my favourite songs of all time. What could be more awesome than to see a guy slaughtering this standard while doing the same, shooting the shit, with the audience that came to see him! It was like the ultimate middle finger, and it made me happy, and it showed me the way.

The band that remains the grail for you?

Queen, because the show side, the big show, is the ultimate for me. In the early 70s, my favourite musical period, there were no big shows yet, like the Stones started doing afterwards. Queen is the same. Of course, their best albums are from the 70s, but the peak of their career for me is the Wembley concert in 1986. Magic wasn't a great record, but the show was breathtaking, dantesque, with a repertoire as vast as it was delirious. If Ghost could ever come close to the 1986 Queen, I would be delighted.

The greatest Swedish band?

ABBA, of course. No one will ever be able to stand in their way. The Beatles are the monarchs of English rock, ABBA the monarchs of Swedish pop. Björn and Benny are national heroes. I found myself at a huge, formal party when Benny suddenly sat down at the piano and started Thank You For the Music. There was silence in a second. This guy is a monument. You can't imagine what ABBA has done, not only for pop music, but also for Sweden and the Swedes. This band proved that you can move mountains.

Which Ghost song are you most proud of?

Cirice, probably. I often write my songs by singing into my phone a melody that is in my head. We were about to finish the album Meliora. And the co-producer tells me that a really heavy and powerful track is missing. I tell him I have this heavy, heavy, macabre sounding tune with a long intro and a crushing riff. He suggests I tweak it while he goes for a run. When he came back, I had written a chorus, lyrical, catchy. It wasn't the leaden track he was hoping for. But it won us a Grammy!

The most evil band?

Certainly not Mercyful Fate, as one might imagine. They, like most Norwegian death metal bands, more or less satanic, are the most charming guys I've ever met. They seem more like nice teachers than evil creatures. The scariest band is probably Von, a mythical American black metal band from Hawaii. These guys were really scary, with their terrifying size, they looked really dangerous. But I think the evil is mostly on the side of those who pretend to defend the good. For me, the most evil and unattractive musician is Ted Nugent. He's pro-life, pro-hunting, and claims he's only fighting for freedom. But the world he defends is about as free and tolerant as Vladimir Putin's. I refuse to listen to him.

[rowiewritesstuff]

Hello! I saw you were taking requests and I was wondering if you could write a fic or a small prompt in T.F.P. where the human!reader is new to the team and is very outgoing and flirty but shy around her curhses and she becomes friends with her teammates as an agent herself? Maybe O.P. becomes smitten after a while with her? Hmmm? And everyone just notices and teases them about being a couple when they aren't, but they're both in denial and drunk shenanigans ensue with the reader being drunk and flirty towards him and teasing him? ^^ You can always add anything new of course! I got this idea when reading fluff and the song "Moves Like Jagger" kind of reminded me of the potential dynamic? Especially, the- "Take me by the tongue And I'll know you Kiss til you're drunk And I'll show you"

TFP Optimus Prime X Flirty! Reader

Mentions of Drinking Alcohol! 

Hope this is okay lol

Fowler had brought you into the fold simply out of desperation- the poor man just wanted to take a vacation and all of the paperwork prevented him from doing so. He knew that while you weren’t always professional, you were the best damn agent they had.

When you were introduced to the bots, the first thing you said to Optimus was “What’s cookin’ good lookin’?” while winking.

Agent Fowler immediately face palmed. 

You became quick friends with pretty much all of the bots. Arcee because of your war stories, Bulkhead because you always had time for his ‘stupid’ questions, Ratchet because of your aptitude for Cybertronian medicine, and Bumblebee because you were just generally friendly. Optimus was hard to make friends with at first because of his reserved personality, but you both discovered your shared love for reading.  

You and Optimus often read books at the same time and talked about them- like a book club, but just for the two of you. For someone who takes almost nothing seriously, you are very intelligent. He sees why you are one of the best agents.

While they all became friends quickly, that didn’t mean they supported your flirting. You would often flirt to ease an awkward silence, or lighten the dark mood that so often sets on the base. 

There was a great victory against the Decepticons- a mine was taken right from under their noses which led to a lot being added to their reserves. Some of the energon was of a higher concentration- to which you learned was called high grade. 

Optimus noticed that the morale in the base was low, despite getting a great win against their foes. This led you to suggest a party. So a party he had. All of the kids were sent home early, and you drove with Bumblebee to pick up vodka and some mini-shot bottle shots. 

Once you got back to the base, you all began the party. Somehow, you managed to get the normally serious Prime to have a drinking challenge with you. So there you were: chugging down straight vodka while Optimus chugged an energon cube. The other bots (with Ratchet being the loudest somehow) began cheering. You beat Optimus much to everyone’s surprise. They didn’t think a small thing like you could beat them in any drinking game.

Once the excitement of the drinking game calmed down, everyone but you and Optimus went to bed. 

You both sat across from each other talking about your pasts. What you did before you came to be at the base and all that.

“You used to be an archivist? Like a librarian?” A grin pulled onto your face. "Can I get a reference number?” Optimus blinked a confused look. “So I can, y’know, check you out?” You slurred.

A loud bark of a laugh came from the Prime. “Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you’d never be a free person.”

You nearly spit up your vodka with laughter. “Didn’t know you could flirt, Op!"

An uncharacteristic smirk came across his face as he made his way over to you. He leaned down near your ear, and whispered “There’s a lot I can do.” 

You couldn't help the huge blush that covered your face as you suddenly got shy. "Better cool it before I have to kiss you!" You tried to maintain your cool persona, but when he leaned in and grabbed your chin you just melted into a flustered mess.

In the morning, Ratchet had the worst hangover. He grumbled as he made his way into the medbay, only to freeze. There you and Optimus were. Optimus was laying up against the wall at an angle while you laid on his chest snoring away. 

Ratchet couldn’t help the small smile that wormed onto his face as he left the room, shutting the lights off behind him.

[i0veless]

➛ DATING VINICIUS JR

𖥻 WARNINGS ー [ none ] 𖥻 AUTHORS NOTE ー [ requested by anon "speaking of vini jr because he is a beautiful man, would you write those dating headcanons for him?? he needs more attention, I swear 😓🙏" I would like to thank you, anon whoever you are for brining me out of writer's block city and also writing for my many husbands, hope you enjoy!! ]

➛ previous | taglist | masterlist | next

vini is def a silly goofy bf. lot's of pranks. on you especially. you love them. but you prefer when you pull them together. especially on his teammates and fans. seems like a hugs type a guy. def does it when ever he gets the chance. his love language is also probably physical affection. also gift giving and quality time. even though the last one is quite difficult to do since his busy schedule. but he still loves taking you out on dates.

okay so hear me out. we know vini is the dancing king. I mean, come on. the man got moves like jagger. so he def made serval celebration dances just for you. it's kinda your little thing that when he scores the goal and you recognise the dance. that you know he's thinking of you. and after a match. especially a win. best believe this man is spoiling you like the queen you are. full of kisses and hugs. as you both ignore the rest of the world.

[knickknacksandallthat]

"every boy band dance move i know, I have learned against my will"--Kevin, knowing full well all jeremy had to do was grab his hand and drag him to the center of the living room to TEACH HIM said moves

OMG anon, how did you know that I have an entire headcanon around Kevin being smooth as f*ck on the dance floor? But it's ENTIRELY AGAINST HIS WILL.

Like literally, there's a scene in Once in a Blue Moon that I'm writing where Jeremy is going to drop this knowledge bomb on Jean and blow his freaking mind. (TBD if it makes final cut - if not, I'll come back and post it here.)

But yes. Absolutely. Jeremy knows Kevin's got the moves like jagger. Boy has instinctive rhythm and grace. It's that natural athleticism (and the boy's ability to pop it and lock it.) He takes full and unabashed advantage of this knowledge and drags Kevin into the living room to teach him the entirety of N*Sync's Bye Bye Bye so he can have an absolute MOMENT the next time they're at the club.

[aweirdoandhisfanfics]

Cancelled MLJ x Overload fanfic

It got cancelled because I didn't really liked the direction where the fic was going, I don't think i'm going back to writte it, since I have much bigger projects to do, so i'll be posting here the ideas and the general plot of the fic for any writter looking for ideas to what to writte next, you have my permission to use it.

(TW: small mentions of overdose and drug use)

MLJ full name was 'Marvin Luke Jackes', and if you noticed it, te name sounds really similar to 'Moves Like Jagger'.

Overload civilin name was 'Ash', I don't remember why I picked it, but I think it was because it sounded similar to 'Astley'.

MLJ started his music career really young, at 16 after he won a 'The Voice-esque' show together with his friends, Rasputin, Dario (DARE) and Valencio (Viva Las Vegas).

I never really decided what the name of the boy band would be, but I always called them "The YMCA Boys".

At the start, the TYMCAB, started great, but after some time, things started to get sour between MLJ and Valencio, MLJ wanted to make more "artsy" music, while Valencio really only cared about doing music just to win money, which lead to creative divergences between the two, but Rasputin and Dario were there to keep them together.

Everything changed after Dario's death, MLJ couldn't support the loss of his friend and leaved the group, Rasputin leaved shortly after, and with that the TYMCAB was over after 6 years, and everyone followed their own paths.

The reason why Dario died is a thing much discussed by the Danceverse media, since much of it wasn't revealed for privacy reasons, but the most accepted answer was that he died of overdose.

Ash in the other hand worked in a coffee shop (yes, this was a coffee shop AU).

Ash/Overload worked together with a team of superheroes with Money Man (Alfonso Signorini) and Comics Girl (Break Free).

Money Man is the Batman/Bruce Wayne of te Danceverse, he doesn't have any powers, and uses gadgets and oter equipments to fight crime, as a civilian he works as a TV show host, and as a politician.

Comics Girl is te Wonder Woman of the Danceverse having superhuman strenght, flight, superhuman speed, super durability, etc. As a civilian, her name is Artemis, and she is a college student.

Now for the general plot.

Some months after the death o Dario, MLJ is in a bar grieving when he meets Ash, they talk a little, they exchange numbers, then they part ways.

One year later, MLJ is walking to Dancity cemetary where he goes to place some flowers over Dario's tomb, he encounters Rasputin and Valencio there, there's a minor disagreament between MLJ and Valencio who Rasputin is quick to separate, and they place their homages to Dario, and they part ways

Meanwhile, Ash and Alfonso are discussing superhero things when MLJ enters the coffee shop, Alfonso goes to sit down while Ash and MLJ talk, Ash says sorry because they had a date last night, which Ash didn't showed up (superhero things), MLJ says that it's fine, and they talk a little more, when MLJ was exiting the shop Alfonso stops him and gives him an offer, a friend of his wants to create his own band and he needs members, MLJ accepts which leads to the "Moves Like Jagger" map that we have.

Some months later, MLJ and Ash are fighting, because that's the fifth date in sequence that Ash doesn't come and he is starting to get out of patience, Ash thinks about revealing to MLJ about his secret identity, but he doesn't want to leave his own life and MLJ life in risk, so he runs away, and MLJ tries to run at him, but he's not able to reach Ash and he leaves.

Ash then flies to Artemis appartement since it was the closest nearby in search of what to do now, while MLJ is discussing what just happened with Levi (Moves Like Jagger C1).

This is pretty much everything that I had for the fic, again, if you want you can have this ideas and the general plot for yourself, just don't forget to credit me.

[formosusiniquis]

"I didn't know agreeing to this would mean a private show." Steve's grin is absolutely shit eating as he looks up at Eddie from where he's curled beneath his chin.

"I can stop."

"No, no, no don't you dare, Tom Bombadil. I just wanted to know if you wanted me to call Jeff or Freak to give you a backing track." This was a mistake. 'Oh, Eddie, I just want to know more about what you and the kids like. Oh, Eddie won't you read it to me; cause Robin says I'm dyslexic. Oh, Eddie, please pretty please, you're so handsome and have such a sexy voice, won't you curl up with me and teach me about hobbits?' He should have seen it for the obvious trap it was.

"I'm stopping."

He can't even sit up all the way, because his stomach muscles are still half gnawed and Steve gets heavy the way a cat does once he gets comfortable. But still the minute he starts to move, Steve has his hands on him. "No, Eddie, no! I'm just kidding, I'm sorry, I was just surprised, okay?"

"Okay." He nestles back down in bed, lets them sit quietly for a second so they can both get comfortable.

Another trap.

"Yeah, I mean starstruck really. A private concert from the frontman of Corroded Coffin. I feel like one of those girls that fucked Mick Jagger. I mean normally you play for like tens of people."

"Oh fuck you! That's it, I'm done, goodnight." Fuck the book, fuck his stomach muscles, Eddie rolls out of Steve's hunky arms and turns his back to the bastard.

"No, no, I'm sorry!" Those hunky arms still work though and once he's sitting up Steve can roll Eddie back over to face him like he's flipping his pillow. It is, unfortunately, extremely hot. "I wanna know what happens to Merry and Pippin, keep going." Even worse, that was hot too.

"Fine." He smooths out the cover where it got bent in the manhandling, finds his page once again.

"And you'll do the voices?"

"If you shut up about it."

He doesn't, but Eddie never really expected him to. He gets the last laugh anyway, when Dustin catches Steve singing Ol' Tom Bombadil under his breath while cleaning the pool and demands a full book report.

[jjsmaybank20]

hear me out, would you be interested in writing a fic where reader hasn’t told the team (bau) a lot about themselves and they’re in a band and one of the girl in the team had a crush on them. It can be any girl but if it could be jj i’d be happy :)

Out of My League

Jennifer Jareau x Fem!Reader

Summary: You weren't an open person. But maybe a certain blonde (Not Garcia) can break down those walls? Or when Garcia does her thing and finds out you have a band.

Warnings: Language, Innuendos, mostly just fluff

Word Count: 2.7k

A/N: I'm honestly pretty proud of this one. Lmk what y'all think!

navigation   criminal minds masterlist

---

You were a guarded person by nature. Honestly, it worked out well for you because of the career path you chose.  

Your childhood wasn’t the greatest, and as you got older you developed trust issues. You promised yourself that you wouldn’t fully open up to someone unless you deeply trusted them so you wouldn't get hurt again.

Only a small number of people had broken through your solid barriers. Your bandmates were among the few, along with your best friend, SSA Derek Morgan. 

When you were transferred to the BAU, both you and Derek were ecstatic. He was so excited to introduce you to the team that was like his found family. 

---

“Derek! Quit yanking on my arm! Your like a fucking toddler.” You snap playfully at your best friend. He laughs at you before continuing to pull you towards your new place of work.

Once you get in the elevator, Derek turns to you. “I know you’re a very private person, so I haven’t told them all that much about you. I also haven’t told them that you are joining the team. I’m telling you this so that you can prepare yourself for an onslaught of questions, especially from Penelope and Reid.”

“Penelope and Reid… Babygirl and Prettyboy?” You ask, poking fun at Derek’s nicknames for his favorites on the team.

He nods his head happily before slinging his arm over your shoulder. You exit the elevator and enter the bullpen. 

“Alright, Jagger, I’m going to go put my shit down at my desk. You go up to Hotch’s office to get the basics.” Derek states as he separates from you. You nod at him before making your way up to the big office at the top of the stairs in front of you.

Looking into the office, you see a middle-aged man sitting at a desk. Knocking on the doorframe, the man looks up before saying, “You must be Y/N. I’m Aaron Hotchner, but everybody just calls me Hotch. Come on in, close the door behind you.”

You do as he says before walking over and shaking his hand. You take a seat across from him and he starts briefing you on what working at the BAU would be like. 

Meanwhile, the rest of the team has gathered outside in the bullpen. They whisper to each other, trying to figure out who you are and what you are doing in their boss’s office. Derek stands off to the side, smirking to himself.

Finally, Emily looks over at him and notices the look on his face. “Do you know something we don’t, Morgan?”

Derek just shrugs and smiles to himself. The rest of the team turns to him and starts badgering him with questions until the office door opens and you and Hotch step out. 

You thank Hotch before realizing that the rest of the team is staring at you with a variety of facial expressions. 

Penelope with excitement, Rossi and Emily with slight confusion, Reid with slight understanding, Derek with a smug look, and JJ with her jaw slightly dropped.

You can’t help but spend a little more time staring at JJ. She was the most gorgeous woman you had ever seen. You quickly shake yourself out of your stupor, and move to go stand by your best friend.

He grabs your head and shakes it while saying, “I missed you, Jagger.”

You snort before quietly exclaiming, “It’s literally been 10 minutes.” He laughs at that and puts his arm around you.

The whole team with the exception of Hotch watch the interaction with confusion. 

Hotch then clears his throat to get everyone's attention. “This is Y/N Y/L/N. She’s the newest member of the BAU. Please treat her with respect. I will let you all get acquainted now.” He then walks back into his office to continue his paperwork.

Almost immediately, Garcia descends on you. “How do you know Derek? Where did you guys meet? How long have you known each other? Why are you transferring to the BAU? Do you have any pets? Siblings? Why’d Derek call you Jagger? I need personal details!” 

You chuckle nervously. “Um, Derek and I went to college together. So we’ve known each other since we were both 18. Uh, I have a dog, and um, no comment on the last two.”

Morgan quickly interferes, steering you away, and moving towards the kitchen. Garcia trails behind, still firing questions at you.

 Emily approaches JJ, who is still staring at you. She taps JJ’s chin before teasingly saying, “You got a bit of drool right there.”

JJ smacks her hand away, blushing. She can’t help but drool over you. Your Y/H/C hair falling gorgeously over your face, that button up shirt clinging to your muscles perfectly so she can see everytime you accidentally flex, your tall stature that towers over even Morgan.

“Oh, my god! You’re totally into the newbie!” Emily gushes. JJ goes to deny her statement, but completely loses her train of thought when she catches sight of you picking Derek Morgan up and holding him bridal style, your back flexing making her mouth go dry. 

All of her is focused on your taunt muscles, so much so that Emily has to wave her hand in front of her face multiple times to get her to snap out of it. 

“My new goal is to get you two together as soon as I can!” Emily all but squeals. 

---

A few months have passed, and honestly, you couldn’t love your job more. The team is amazing, and you get to see your best friend and the woman you have developed a crush on almost every day.

During the time in which you have worked at the BAU, you and JJ have gotten significantly closer. You started to bond over pictures of your dog and an 18-year-old Derek Morgan on the plane ride home from a case. 

Even with the newfound closeness with the team, you still let barely anything be known about your personal life. You were fine with them knowing next to no deep details about yourself.

After getting to know Garcia, you should have known that nothing would be a secret for long. You slip up one time and say something too specific, and Garcia is off and deep diving.

That’s what leads to her bursting into the bullpen at 7 in the morning, and practically screaming at you, “You're in a band?!”

You bang your head down on your desk, muttering something about it being too early, before realizing what she said. Your head immediately snaps up and you look at her in shock. 

“Wha- bu- how… Did Derek say something? If he did, I’m going to kill him!” You splutter out. Garcia quickly shakes her head.

“No, no! It’s just, you mentioned the other day that he calls you Jagger because you play an instrument, so out of curiosity, I searched up Y/N Y/L/N music, and lo and behold, you have a whole ass band!” She exclaims.

At this point, the rest of the team gathered around, curious about the loud disruption to their mornings. 

JJ couldn’t help but imagine you playing guitar, sweat dripping down you, intensely focused on what you are playing. Oh god, did that mental image make her feel something.

She was snapped back to reality when you start answering some of the questions that the rest of the team has for you. You had honestly given up on keeping information on your band a secret.

“Yes, I’m in a band. No, we don’t play jazz, Rossi. We mainly play indie and rock. The band name is Clash Compact. We have a couple originals, but we usually do covers. And yes, we do have an upcoming gig.” Just then, Derek walks into the bullpen.

“Ah, did Garcia find the band? Yeah, y’all are playing over at Shaw’s on Thursday, right?” You desperately signal for him to stop talking, but he plows through until he reveals when and where you're playing.

You sigh in resignation. Finally, you nod your head. JJ then pipes up, saying, “What if… I mean we don’t have to if you don’t want us to… but I mean… we could come see you play?” 

You look over at her and see the hope in her gorgeous eyes. There is no way you can say no to her. “Fine. If y’all want to come, have Derek text you the information.”

You then walk away, missing the excitement and slight lust at the thought of seeing you perform in JJ’s eyes. 

---

When Thursday comes around, the team gathers outside of the bar Derek had told them to meet at. You and Derek were already there, so when you spotted them, you welcomed them inside warmly.

You quickly introduced them to your bandmates, who were happy to meet the people you talked about almost constantly. 

The bassist of the band and your good friend, Fay, pulled you to the side. She pointed out JJ and asked, “Is that the one you won’t shut up about?” When you nod your head, she grins at you. “She seems nice. Very pretty.”

You smile at her, and pull her into a side hug. You are distracted enough that you don’t notice JJ jealously glaring your way. Derek makes his way towards her. 

“So how's your crush on Jagger fairing? Asked her out yet?” He teases. She glares at him before frustratedly replying, “Does the whole team know? Also, clearly, not well. She’s totally into Fay.”

Derek laughs loudly at that. “Oh my god! You think she’s into Fay? JJ, they dated a couple years ago, decided they were better as friends, and then Jagger set her up with Rocco. Also, we are profilers, and you are very obvious. The only one who doesn’t know is Y/N.”

JJ looks at him confused. “Wait, who’s Rocco again?”

Derek then moves to point out your bandmates to her. “Ok, so the one you are insanely jealous of is Fay, who is dating the brunette over there, Rocco. He’s super cool. That person over there with the colorful hair, the one who is intensely flirting with Reid, that’s Malik. They’re awesome. We dated for a little while, but our lives got too busy, so now we’re just friends.”

JJ nods in understanding and relief. She can’t help but want you all to herself. 

Soon, the bar is packed. You know you will be going on soon, so you go to say goodbye to your friends.

Playing in front of a lot of people always makes you anxious. You were nervous, but confident. The feeling was good.

You smiled at the encouraging looks from Derek in the crowd as you nodded at him in farewell before moving to the back of the bar and walking toward the stage.

Grouping up with your bandmates, you go over how the night will play out. Soon, you guys were told you were on next. 

Rushing to grab the guitar you had left stored at the back of the stage earlier, you hang the instrument on your torso, and walk to the stage after being announced by the clerk.

Most of the people who have filled the bar are regulars, so they knew your band pretty well. Still, even the general crowd seems excited to see you guys play.

You nodded slightly as your group got adjusted to the equipment on stage already. Raising your hands, you move the microphone in front of you to be level with your mouth.

“Good evening, everyone.” You repeated the standard greeting for all introductions. “I hope you are all well. For those of you who don't know who we are, I’ll introduce us. I’m Y/N, our drummer is Malik, our bassist is Fay, and our keyboardist is Rocco. We are Clash Compact.”

As each of your bandmates is named, they wave at the audience. 

“Today we’re going to start with one of my favorites, and then we’ll take your requests. This goes out to the women I’ve discovered I am really into. I’m pretty sure she’s here tonight! I hope y’all enjoy it.”

You smiled at the applause and looked at your bandmates before you began. Out of My League by Fitz and the Tantrums had become one of your favorite songs over the past few weeks, and because of its rapid popularization, many of the people in the bar recognized the melody and the first few verses quickly, letting out exclamations of excitement.

You smiled shyly as you sang, keeping your eyes closed to enjoy the music better.

When you risked looking into the crowd, you almost hit the wrong notes.

The woman you had been crushing on these past few months was standing almost front row, and your gaze met hers immediately. 

She looked just as beautiful as she did the day you met her, now with a ponytail that left her neck exposed. You shouldn’t think about this now because you were playing in front of one hundred people, but you can’t help it.

Your gaze stayed on her until the song was over, and you knew your legs were shaking because she looked back the whole time.

On the last note, you gave her a wink and she rolled her eyes with a smile, and because of the distance you didn’t notice the redness in her cheeks.

When the music requests began, you could no longer find her in the crowd. Searching for her, you noticed that she had moved to the bar and was standing with her back to the stage, appearing to chat animatedly with a man you didn’t recognize.

---

Once your set is over, you quickly make your way off the stage, jealousy coursing through your veins. Almost the entire time you were playing, JJ was talking to this man.

Moving through the crowd, you approach her at the bar. You greet her quickly with a peck on the cheek that makes her turn bright red, which in turn makes you smirk. 

“Hi! I’m Y/N. And you are…?” You say to the man in an overly friendly voice. “I’m Will! Nice to meet you! You guys were great.” You shake his hand and thank him before putting your hand on the small of JJ’s back, causing shivers to run down her spine.

Will then turns to JJ, and says it was nice to meet her, and that he would love to grab a drink some other time.  You quickly lace your fingers together and practically snap, “Sorry, she’s taken. You seem like a nice guy, though.”

He quickly apologies, and moves away as fast as he can. JJ turns your head towards her, and asks with a little smile on her face, “Girlfriend? Really?” Realization then dawns on her face and she inquires, “Were you jealous?!” You go to deny, but as soon as you look into her eyes, you know you can’t lie to her.

You sigh in defeat. “Yeah, I guess I was. He took all your attention away for the whole damn show! And I really like you, and I wanted to impress you. I even sang a song and dedicated it to you! I mean, I hate sharing things about my life, but you make me want to share everything about me. I want to tell you about my siblings, my pets growing up, my traumas, my everything!”

You finally stop to take a breath. Suddenly you are pulled into a kiss. You quickly melt into it and wrap your arms around JJ. When she finally pulls back, she looks at you softly before quietly stating, “I like you too, you dork. I’m happy you trust me enough to want to share stuff with me.”

You smile at her before pulling her back into a kiss, this one much sweeter than the one before. “Would you want to be my girlfriend?” You shyly ask. She nods her head vigorously. 

Suddenly you hear Derek yell, “Get it, Jagger!” He then gasps, looking to the right of you, before exclaiming, “And Prettyboy! Damn, son!” 

Looking to your left, you see Malik and Reid really getting into it. Laughing with your friends, you look around and realize there is no other place you’d rather be. You are so grateful for these wonderful people in your life.

---

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