#he doesn’t care about power dynamics… unless near is the one beating him

[woodohwanedandproud]

@applestorms #HONESTLY. hot take but i think most questionable mello fanon characterization takes like you list here #come from the fact that he just Treats Near Different #like YES so much of this post is so correct #mello does not have an insane temper… unless near is the one setting him off #he doesn’t care about power dynamics… unless near is the one beating him #he’s not harsh or impatient… unless he’s talking to near #mello loses his handle on All of his shit around Near Specifically. it all goes back to him #he is perfectly capable of being a chill mostly well adjusted adult #perhaps with his fair share of flaws and childhood traumas yes #he’s intelligent and calculating and works well in a crisis #his shit just gets Flipped the second near enters the picture #my god. what a man @biscuit-o #also for the gun thing i just rebloged this very informative analysis #that pointed out how mello doesn't have any trigger discipline #(and then he magically develops one during his meeting with near lol) #so who knows if he even has bullets in it #because i don't believe he is careless enough to wave his loaded gun around while his finger is on the trigger #though this would make all his threats quite funny

Not to be some sort giant simp, but because it's his birthday I wanted to write something nice and complimentary for him. But also genuinely and objectively as possible I think Mello is actually a fair bit more humane (or maybe the better term is "less cold-blooded") than get gets credit for?

The evidence:

1. He was very genuinely upset when they are informed of L's death, and doesn't even think about the matter of the successor-ship until Near speaks up alluding to it.

2. After Sayu was rescued/traded from the mafia she's asked to help in the investigation by providing any details of her experience. However she can't because she says she neither saw nor spoke much to her kidnappers. This indicates Mello (as the mastermind of all things related to this project) told the mafia members that they were to stay away from her and generally left her alone. She's a tool to him to achieve his ends but he takes no pleasure in using her this way nor has intention to cause her any additional harm, fear, suffering than is already an unavoidable part of being kidnapped and held hostage across the world.

3. When Soichiro confronts him with the Death Note by announcing Mello's real name and then actually starts writing, Mello could have killed him on the spot faster than Soichiro could write. He had access to the gun next to him in the open desk drawer. You can tell that even in this case he doesn't want to shoot Soichiro, and though Mello's hand hovers over the gun ready to grab it, he does his best to talk Soichiro down instead. Then he apologizes to Soichiro and thinks about how he never intended for Soichiro to die but at the same time he shouldn't have joined up with Kira. There is an important difference here between the anime and the manga; in the anime he tells this to Soichiro aloud which might be interpreted as a way to distract Soichiro while Jose prepares to fire, but in the manga because it's unspoken we know it wasn't meant as a distraction, but genuine regret and remorse.

4. When Mello crashed the SPK, Lidner wasn't really a hostage. She'd already been helping him secretly for a while and continues to do so afterwards; and she -wanted- Mello and Near to work together and was trying to help them do that - meaning she'd have gladly brought them together regardless. But they role-played her like one to cover for her in front of her colleagues, make it seem like she was being forced into it rather than reveal the truth that she was a double-agent.

5. While Mello frequently brandishes his gun as a threat and for coercion, he never actually fires it. Still no one ever doubts that he would use it if needed. Despite fanon often portraying him as a trigger happy nut-job, the canon demonstrates how controlled and coldly resolved he truly is.

6. A pretty commonly repeated sentiment on social media discussions is that unlike Near, Mello doesn't work well with others because he's too much of a lone-wolf and too insecure to work in a team because he would make everything about dominance and power struggle.

I really don't think this is right. Despite stubbornly refusing to work with Near, the evidence shows he's pretty good at getting along and working with other people. Like in the mafia he seems perfectly happy to let Rod Ross be top-dog; he doesn't appear to have any interest in being a big shot and throwing his weight outside of matters directly involving the notebook. Rod Ross is the one to give orders, dole out discipline, and is generally in charge, and he trusts Mello because Mello's proven his value as a loyal team member over time.

He also works well with Halle and Matt who both appear to be there by choice, neither are in the least afraid of or deferential to him and they seemingly work on equal terms together as opposed to a hierarchical boss/subordinate relationship, which is for example so prominently characterizes Near's interactions with his group.

With Matt in particular he's way more patient than is even reasonable to expect, given how it seems like Matt spends a lot of time whining, slacking off, and messing up - no shade meant on Matt (love him dearly) but going by the manga that is what we see. But Mello never scolds him or gets angry or snappy. Mello's internal monologue does show that he's annoyed but he doesn't externalize it, doesn't lash out and is patiently long-suffering when it comes to Matt's shortcomings. He basically just accepts the situation being what it is and moves on. And of course is regretful and sad when Matt dies.

We don't see much of Halle and Mello's interactions as they mostly take place offscreen/off-page but from what there is they seem very casual and comfortable with each other and Halle was very clearly emotionally affected by his death and speaks up for him in 104, believing he sacrificed himself intentionally. Basically, Mello's issues and anti-social behavior stemming from his inferiority complex is SPECIFICALLY centered on and triggered by Near. With everyone else he was able to work very effectively, and they hold him in high regard and can maintain good relationships with him.

7. He seems to have sympathy for Misa and is judgmental about the way Light weaponizes her trauma and idolization.

8. Although she's on his enemy's team, he felt enough pity for Takada provide her a blanket when he orders her to undress, which directly contributes to his own demise. I believe he knew (intended as part of his plan) that X-Kira would kill her to stop her from talking, so it was a small gesture that is practical in that it could make her more willing to quickly cooperate, but also give some small comfort during the short remaining time of her life.

None of this makes him not-evil or villainous, but I do think he's genuinely a more compassionate person than he's typically cast as. Certainly the least villainous of Death Note's wide cast of villains. As it's noted in the Japanese wording of Volume 13 he's "not pure evil" and he "has a pure heart and acts mean to get the attention of the person he likes" (scream). I don't think Ohba intended any of the Wammy's characters to be either pure good or irredeemably evil.

[slasherhaven]

✨Hi✨Can you write a headcanon for slashers' toxic treats in a relationship? (It may their insecurities, being too jealous/overprotective ect..) thank you so much and i love your blog 💖🦄

You mean other than the murder and sadism???? Sure! 😂 (Not all of these are ‘toxic traits’, some are just problems that you might have in the relationship. Not including the whole murder thing...)

The Slashers and their toxic traits:

Thomas Hewitt 

His insecurities. He beats himself up so much about everything and it occasionally gets in the way of your relationship. For the most part you are able to reassure him and he comes around, missing being with you. However, he can start to hide down on the basement and start avoiding you, causing a divide between you both. He’ll comes around or you will march down there and confront him, lovingly, and he’ll feel better for a while. It’s a slow process building Tommy’s self worth but you’re a huge help!

His family? I mean...we all know Hoyt isn’t exactly friendly. Once you’re a part of the family, he expects you to have some sort of part in their chores. He also has a habit of teasing you and Thomas, and not in a very playful way, normally worsening Thomas’ insecurities. Luda May isn’t completely innocent either, though. She does love you but is pretty tough in the early stages of your relationship, like she doesn’t trust you. Once you’re officially a member of the family, she eases up on you though. 

Michael Myers 

Can be very cold. This shouldn’t be surprising. He’s a very stoic, cold man who is mostly unaffectionate. It takes so long to start building physical affection with him that most people would just give up before they get there. Of course, it’s worth it for when he finally starts to open up to it, but it can be draining on you.

Likes to get his way. He’s stubborn and independent. The thought of having somebody rely on him or to rely on somebody else makes him very uncomfortable, he isn’t used to it at all. And yet, here you both are. So, he doesn’t ask before doing most things, he just kind of...does. He doesn’t understand why you explain that you would like for him to mention it in the future. An example of this is just leaving the house without telling you, leaving you looking for him before realising he left for the night. He’ll gradually come around to improving on it, starting small, but that means a whole lot coming from Michael.

Jason Voorhees 

His insecurities. Jason doesn’t pull away from you because of it but the more understanding and patient you are, the better it will be. It takes a long time for him to remove the mask and, naturally, that can cause some tension. He’s too worried about scaring you away while you’re worrying that he doesn’t trust you as much as he claims too. This is something that can be dealt with eventually. Once he’s removed the mask and you make him feel loved, this issue slowly fades away.

Isolation? It’s not really his fault. He lives out in a cabin in the middle of the woods near an old run down summer camp and now you live with him. He’s not purposely keeping you away from other people but it’s something that can’t be helped. Of course he’s not going to stop you from taking trips to visit family or friends even if he would miss you, it’s just now always very easy to do so.

Brahms Heelshire 

Selfish. Brahms has a major case of only child syndrome. He can’t accept ‘no’ as an answer, he demands everything he wants, he only really things about himself, mostly because that’s what he’s used too. Thank his parents. Deep down, he really is a sweetheart but you have to chisel away all that nastiness. It’s hard work and you play more of a caretaker role before a romantic partner.

Get’s extremely jealous. He hates the grocery boy’s guts with a vengeance, all because he flirted with you that one time. But he gets jealous over stupid things as well, just when he decides that you aren’t giving him enough attention, which he wants a lot of.

Uses guilt trips. This one you need to stop as soon as possible. It’s how he got his way with his parents, and now he will try to use it against you. As you try to reign in his selfishness, you have to for the same for his guilt trips.

Bo Sinclair

Can’t take responsibility. It takes so much to get him to sincerely apologise. He really needs to see that he’s done something wrong and has really upset you in order to actually apologise. Otherwise he’ll just brush it off and move on, refusing to admit that he did anything wrong.

Manipulative. It’s almost like being manipulative is Bo’s second nature. He does it all the time with people who come into the town but he doesn’t really mean to do it to you. But when he wants something or he’s irritated, he just slips up and it happens. Big fan of saying things like “you’re overreacting”.

Vincent Sinclair 

His insecurities. Vincent can become very withdrawn from you due to his own insecurities. It can really get in the way of your relationship. Of course you’re understanding and compassionate but it does start to wear you down, making you a little irritated. You never let on to those feelings though, always trying to comfort him. Vincent will come around eventually after some reassurance but it can be a tough time.

His relationship with Bo. This is probably a bigger problem than his insecurities. Bo has a lot of power over Vincent and you don’t like it at all, even if you have developed a fondness for the other twin as well. Most of the times it isn’t a problem but when Bo is in a bad mood, he mostly takes it out on Vincent. It can feel like Vincent puts Bo above you, even when Bo is being awful. You understand it, you really do. Bo is the toxic one, not Vincent. But that doesn’t always make things easier.

Lester Sinclair

His relationship with his brothers. Lester isn’t a very toxic person but any relationship with somebody who has a life like his could become a little toxic. You are incredibly important to him but...so are his brothers. It’s highly unlikely that he would leave Ambrose to live a more honest life, or at least try to. He’s more likely to do so than either of the twins but it’s still very unlikely to happen. Sometimes it can make you question his priorities, but he really really does love you more than anything.

Bubba Sawyer

His family. His family is extremely toxic, this shouldn’t be much of a shock. Bubba is probably the least toxic out of all of them, this man just wants to love somebody and be loved in return. By family, I mostly mean Drayton.

Isolation. Like with Jason, this isn’t really his fault but it’s something to consider. If you have family or friends, you likely won’t be able to see them much at all. You could still call and message but you live with the Sawyers now that Drayton doesn’t like the idea of you coming and going. This probably links back to the toxic family dynamics.

Billy Lenz

Jealous/possessive. He’s pretty much a shut in, he doesn’t like leaving the house even though he probably could. He doesn’t have a problem with you having friends but gets a little pouty if you go out with them for a long time, and when you get back home, he is extra clingy. He won’t stop you but you’re well aware that he would rather you just stay with him. He probably feels more lonely than anything.

Asa Emory (The Collector)

Manipulative. Asa knows what he wants and when he wants something, he will get it. He does genuinely try to not purposely manipulate you since he cares about you. However, manipulation usually comes so easily to him that he might not even realise he’s doing it.

His need for control. Asa likes being in control and he loves when you’re submissive to him. This means that he can find it a little difficult to give up some control in the relationship or around the house. It can be infuriating but can be adjusted slowly but it’s not going to be easy.

Jesse Cromeans (Chromeskull) 

Overprotective/possessive. As soon as another man is talking to you, he will be right by your side, his intimidating figure usually being enough to scare them off. If he had it his way, he’d have you with him at all time, only for him to touch or even look at. However, he won’t resort to that unless it’s something you want...still, it’s obvious and it can become overbearing if nothing else.

Depending on your feelings towards his ‘job’, he can be gone for long periods of times. Unless you are completely okay with what he does and go on the ‘business’ trips with him, you are going to be left home alone for long periods of time. Of course, you might be completely okay with that and if that’s the case, there’s no problem. If you need him around some more...well, you might start to feel a little lonely. He always makes it up to you when he gets home though!

Otis Driftwood 

Very focused on himself. He’s just used to only thinking about himself, ever since he was a kid. Of course he does genuinely care about the family and about you (and he doesn’t express that to you better than he does the family) but he’s nowhere near perfect with it. He also has a tendency of pulling away from you when this gets bad. When he realises that it’s bothered you, he doesn’t really apologise either, but he’ll still offer you some comfort.

Anger issues. This man has a temper. He would never turn you but oh boy is it hard work. Most of the time it’s just ranting and shouting about whatever pissed him off. While it doesn’t turn physical or is ever directed at you, it can be a little draining.

Baby Firefly 

Doesn’t take much seriously. Baby tends to treat everything like a joke or just doesn’t realise how serious the situation is to you. It’s not an constant thing, if you’re upset, she’ll notice and take it seriously as she comforts you. But she still sometimes brushes off your concerns (as well as everyone else’s) because she’s practically bouncing with energy.

Yautja (Predator) 

He. Is. An. Alien. I wouldn’t really call this a toxic trait but it definitely causes some complications. The traditions of his race can be...startling. You find far too many skulls in your home when you start courting. You are also likely the thing to introduce him to monogamy, but he adapts to that very fast because you’re so precious to him.

Pretty possessive. He isn’t the jealous type, just very possessive. You are his mate, his little human, and he wants everyone (especially other Yautjas) to know that. At times it might become a little suffocating.

(Look...I’m bias here okay!)

[onepieceheadcannons]

So this wasn't requested but I wanted to give some random Headcanons

Now this post definitely isn't for everyone's taste,

Now I know quite a bit about ABO dynamics and I haven't seen any headcanons on what each strawhat would be. Now if you do not like ABO, do not worry this will be my only post with it that isn't requested and I won't be offended if you skip this.

This definitely isn't the most detailed it can go but it's like 3 am for me and I just want these HC's outta my mind.

The Strawhats

Luffy;

This man is an Alpha, I mean how else could he become Pirate King.

Now I mean no hate to omegas, I think they should be highly respected. But based on what a society in ABO is like, it makes the most sense for Luffy to be an Alpha.

He is protective and strong, plus conquerors Haki is very similar to pheromones. He would do anything for his crew and he wants them safe.

He wouldn't be appealed to have an Omega, it wouldn't be on his agenda and he'd handle a rut very privately.

He would fight his way to the top fairly and wouldn't discriminate against betas and omegas.

I'm also down to hear anyone's different opinions on any of these.

Zoro;

I can see him in many different ways, I can see him as an Alpha but I can see Omega with insecurities about it, but my most confident answer is Beta.

The reason why is because his undying loyalty to Luffy. He would fulfill the role as a Beta quite well. He would be able to avoid the hormones of others and be quite unbothered by all of it. He would work slightly harder to be the greatest swordsman especially if Mihawk is an Alpha. He wouldn't of presented before his best friend died but if she began showing signs of an Alpha, he would probably feel the extra competitive edge to be better.

He wouldn't care if someone is an Alpha or Omega, why should that shit matter to him.

And he wouldn't really care about what his partner was.

If he was an Omega, he would use suppressants and be damned if anyone knew. He would probably beat himself up over it and would build a high tolerance to pheromones. He would NEVER let someone help through a heat unless a long term relationship. And he would never be caught in an Mpreg situation.

And if he was an Alpha, he would accept Luffy as overall Alpha. He wouldn't feel like fighting it and he has the serious demeanor. He would protect any omegas but refuse to participate in a heat. He would fight himself a shit ton and never let his guard down.

Usopp;

Beta man, there's no way he'd be an Alpha. I mean he would always feel sad about it most likely, wanting to be brave and strong. He would probably have some lingering thoughts about the system, he wouldn't see Omegas as less than but he would probably assume that Omegas and Alphas are meant together and he has to find a Beta.

Until his crush on Kaya, the caring Omega. He would fight himself internally over it but she wouldn't care if he was a Beta. She probably was told she had to find a nice Alpha but that wouldn't affect her, she really cares about Usopp. She even goes to medical school to fix him up.

He would be disturbed by Ruts and Heats, he would get flustered and stay away from whoever was having one at the time.

Sanji;

Just like Zoro I can see any of them,

But I'm leaning Beta/Omega. No offense if you are like 😡 I want an Alpha Sanji don't disrespect my man's like that

Reason why I can see Omega, he is quite loving and I think he'd make a great dad. He loves ladies so much and being an Omega wouldn't stop him. I mean hey, look how much he likes fiesty women. He definitely wouldn't be against a female alpha, as long as he doesn't know about the extra appendage during a rut.

His family storyline would play into this, his dad would've been pissed if all Sanjis siblings are an Alpha but Sanji was a "weak" omega son. He would definitely be an angry and powerful Omega, training his tolerance to pheromones. And oh my god he'd be so angry if Zoro is a Beta/Alpha.

He would avoid Alpha men, I don't see him ever wanting to date one. I think he may be a little fruity but it's so internalized he would never be okay dating any male. He would probably hope for any female, but preferring an Omega/Beta.

If Sanji is a Beta, he'd be right up there with being a supporter of Luffy. He would definitely offer to help Omegas through a heat (and promptly get turned down) . He would be frustrated anytime an Alpha was in a rut and avoid being near them at all costs. It would piss him off especially if they wanted one of the crew.

His preferences would stay the same as if he were an omega.

And as an Alpha, oh my this man would be the most respectful ever. He would be damned before he let himself with an Omega without consent said before the heat was even close. He would protect his Omega at all costs. And he would let them bite his neck back. And he would defend any omegas in a vulnerable position. He definitely has a savior complex about it though. But he definitely would believe he could only have an Omega.

Brook;

He is a skeleton, this wouldn't even affect him.

As a human tho, I could see an Omega with his love of the arts and his love for Laboon and his crew. But I don't have much of detailed one for him. Beta, possibly but that's the easiest to presume someone as.

Chopper;

He is a damn reindeer. I just wanted to include my besties name but yeah he is a reindeer no way in hell would this affect him and he'd just make suppressants for everyone. Even with the human human fruit, that wouldn't add abo to his form.

Franky;

Now there's a chance that now as a cyborg this doesn't affect him. But pre cyborg or if it did, I see him as an Omega.

This man cries his heart out (which I love dearly about him) and he is such a big bro/dad figure.

He wouldn't care what anyone was but as a kid he may have had some trouble with the concept until Tom taught him better. Esp with Ice for Brains, who I could see as an Alpha/Beta so Franky may have felt less than.

Robin;

Alpha or Beta, but she isn't an Omega.

She holds herself up with an air of stoic and dark humor/themes. She would be quite a helpful Beta and she'd protect any Omega friends. She would feel very strongly about Omegas being seen as the same as everyone else. And she would feel very insecure if she was made to submit to anyone unwillingly.

I can see Alpha tho, (esp Frobin <3), she lets Franky let his tears out and she is such a good friend. She would struggle to let her feelings out which would make her line in Enies lobby even more important. She would be experienced and she would probably offer to help an omega she was very close to but she wouldn't settle down unless you are Franky or a very solid partner to her. She wouldn't care if you were another Alpha or Beta though, she'd love you for you.

Jinbe/Jimbei;

Now I don't know if Fish people/men would even be affected but if they were.. he would be...

Alpha, but in a very nonchalant way. He was a warlord, and not just anyone would get that. He wouldn't ever make someone submit and he would fight for rights for everyone esp Omegas in his community. If he did settle down, it wouldn't matter to him. Just as long as he can share his feelings in a safe place.

But beta would work as well, he is quite devoted to his crews and is a loyal person in general and shows alot of care to Luffy during the timeskip.

I also haven't finished Fish man Island yet so I have little to work with.

Nami;

I did save her for last, this is probably the most biased one. I mean as you guys will learn, she's my girlfriend/wife, so I may see her slightly different than someone else would.

Now I feel like as many of the others, she can fit in all three. I mean everyone is going to show traits to each kind which is why I try to explain myself for each.

Alpha, i can see this. She's very fiesty and she sure as hell wouldn't want to submit to anyone. She would be a little embarrassed during a Rut and she would use suppressants. She would be fine with not being top dog but she definitely wants her respect, she's the entire reason they get anywhere.

She isn't looking for romance but she'd be fine with anyone as long as they were worth it. I think an Alpha male would be her least likely pair though, that person would have to be quite honorable and prove themselves to her as good enough.

If she's an Omega, she would be quite angry about it. She wouldn't want to be perceived as weak and sure as hell would use suppressants and she'd be damned if an alpha helped her through a heat. The only way she would, would be after a super solid relationship where there's extreme trust. She would slap the crap out of Sanji if he tried anything or suggested anything, she wouldn't have any patience especially after she had to deal with the bullshit she heard her entire time with Arlong and other crews stealing treasure.

If she was a beta, she'd probably go after another Beta. Keep thing simple. She would eyeroll at any alphas and she would be over the whole alpha/omega bullshit.

[curiousochako]

Evolution on Todomomo (and how its not as a bad as alot of people in the fandom are making it out to be)

Now I’ve been meaning to make a post in defense of Todomomo because from what I see on bnha twt a lot of people just resort to calling the two of them “boring” or making claims that Momo is a lesbian and Shouto as gay (which are fine to head canon if they are a comfort for you) but in the context that most people use to hate on todomomo I see this being used as a way to dismiss the pair 

I first want to link this tumblr post that list some of the todomomo moments (whether they are subtle or moments that mean alot more then what mets the eye)

https://mysterylover123.tumblr.com/post/184164201991/top-todomomo-moments

Todoroki and Momo both got in to U.A by recommendations:

I know that this dosen’t really mean alot in terms of a moment but its just something I wanted to point out in terms of a similarity. Being taken in by recommendations is a huge thing as it shows the audience that both of their skill levels have already been observed by U.A.

Importance of Todoroki praising Momo during the Final Exams:

With this topic I feel that those who tend to claim that the ship is “boring” or just wouldn’t make sense in canon fail to see the significance of that moment. I have to say that I am a bit surprised that alot of the hate comes from Shouto stans. The reason I say this is because that moment of recognition on Momo’s end wasn’t only a benefit for her character (since she finally heard someone tell her that they trust her and believe in her) but Shouto’s as well (since that moment was the first time that the audience saw Shouto taking what he learned from Midoriya at the sports festival about seeing the best in others and using that to help someone else).

For Shouto’s character something such as being able to help others is big for his character since the Final exams arc came in the second season. In specific he told her that he voted for her whenever the class was doing the class representative elections because “I thought you were good at that sort of thing.” that scene showed the audience that Shouto has some admiration for her and that he was one of the only students to analyze Momo’s self confidence issue and try and help her. Because of his honesty she was able to bounce back and find a way for the two of them to beat Aizawa during their final exams

Also going further back from the final exams arc we had a subtle todomomo indication and that was when she was picked to be on Todoroki’s calvary team (that moment showcased Shouto recognizing the strength that Yaoyorozu had hence why he picked her to be on his team) Sure he could have chosen anyone else instead of her but something small and barely much to look into detail will always be a form of foreshadowing on whats to come for later. 

But Deku and Bakugou have more growth with Shouto:

I’ve heard this reasoning many times as well (which no one can deny the importance that Bakugou and Midoriya have in Shouto’s life). Midoriya even emphasis that Shouto is “his friend.” and this might just be me being a bit peeved but its a bit hypocritical whenever Todomomo shippers will just enjoy their moment in the final exams arc and antis will make the “but they only had one moment.” counter argument even though no one says anything when it comes to Midoriya calling Shouto a friend (which isn’t meant in a romantic sense).

Now considering that Midoriya is the main character of the series it makes a lot of sense for him to be involved in Shouto’s character arc (which is about the unveiling of his family). 

I truly wonder where the whole “Bakugou had more growth with Shouto.” argument came into play. From what we know about their bond in canon they bicker and banter (showcasing a playful bond that makes the audience smile) which is a good thing but we never really see the characters either break the others walls to learn more about them or influence each other and make each other stronger. So when I see people compare this to todomomo I kind of just sigh. Sure Todomomo might have less moments then that pair but what Shouto has done to help Momo’s self confidence has carried with her from that point onward in the story. We now see Momo creating plans and being much more confident in herself (I mean when she created the sedative to make Machia go to sleep she showed a side to herself that Shouto already saw in her).

In the case of Midoriya and Todoroki’s bond that same method of helping others has been applied to Shouto’s character during the Sports festival where he tells him that his power “is his not his fathers.” which knowing Izuku thats the kind of person that he is; as a audience we are able to see that he is kind in nature and is known for creating bonds. That moment is truly important for Shouto as a character (which i’m glad the fandom dosen’t tear apart) So my question is for those who stan Shouto is if you are able to accept Izuku’s kind nature of helping Shouto why must Shouto’s moment of helping Yaoyorozu be swept under the rug and just referred to as “boring.”

I mean if anyone truly looked at the final exams moment and only thought that it benefited Yaoyorozu then you skipped over some of the subtle hints Horikoshi has been putting into their dynamic. Yes; it helped Yaoyorozu as a character believe in herself and to trust her decision making but at the same time it showed us that Shouto is perceptive and can give good advice when needed (as well as thinking more about others instead of what he did pre sports festival). 

Kamino Ward arc:

During this arc whenever Bakugou was captured. Trust was built between the two character as Momo tells both Kirishima and Todoroki that she “trusted todoroki” hence her involvement in helping them find their friends. At first she was reluctant but agreed when the two boys asked her. 

Provisional License exams:

Small subtle moment that Hori put in their is whenever the audience saw Midoriya worried for Shouto (since he ended up failing the exams) we got to see Momo’s expression of worry as well. I know this dosen’t mean much but alot of the Todomomo moments that we do get are subtle like that. Even a small facial expression will mean something in the long run. 

Two Heroes:

Again, another small moment of Todoroki using his ice to get everyone to leave the area while he fought some of the movie villains and Momo calling out his name in worry (its a common trope to have one person stay behind while the other is hesitant on leaving them) I am aware that this movie was more Bones heavy rather then Horikoshi but I don’t believe the studio would try any subtle hints of anything unless Horikoshi might of told them something regarding the pair.

Pro Hero Arc:

Like the Two Heroes Todomomo moment we also see Momo look over to Todoroki in worry (as well as the rest of the class) but seeing almost 3 moments where she is present and worried for him whenever Todoroki is either in some emotional state or just focused on something isn’t just for show. Horkoshi could have easily left her out but he wants the audience to see that Todoroki and Momo will have more conversations in the near future. 

Joint Training:

In this arc Todoroki makes small comments during Kendo vs Yaoyorozu 

"If Kendo separated Yaoyorozu from her team out of caution, then I think she's misjudged her."

"If she actually wanted to be cautious of Yaoyorozu, she should have crushed her 4 on 1 with her entire team's power right from the outset."

With these lines he show the audience how perceptive he is about the fight and shows some interest towards it. Shouto also believes in her abilities by making that first statement on Kendo misjudging Momo. However when Yaoyorozu lost to Kendo he comments 

"...I hope she doesn't get all discouraged again." 

Again he shows worry for her as he has already seen her doubts come full circle during the Final Exams arc. It also shows the significance that arc was for his relationship with Momo. He shows concern for her and dosen’t want her to feel discouraged over her loss against Kendo (despite the improvement she has shown us since that arc Shouto still holds a level of care for her).

So to only make claims such as “todomomo only had one moment” that character defined moment wasn’t swept under the rug as we have seen Momo’s insecurities being brought up again by Shouto (who might I add is the only student to know the full extent of them).

Drama CD: Ennichi Festival:

In this drama cd we had Todoroki and Momo spend the night together at the festival that they were at and Shouto opens up about his family to her. In this drama cd he felt like he was bothering her with all this info and Momo is the one to reassure him that he isn’t and that he should be more open about his feelings. Again a moment like this is good for Shouto since he is well known for keeping his feelings to himself (for him to have that type of reassurance would allow him to be more comfortable in his own skin).

You could say in a way that their roles were reversed from how they acted in the Final Exams with this time Shouto showing a bit of insecurity and uncertainty while Momo initiates a method to help him. 

Link to the drama cd on youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ggS9rXS_1ys

Link to all Todomomo moments animated so far:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKr8WOK05RQ

[suckmykawaiidesu]

Compilation of Nessian Moments:  ‘A Court of Wings and Ruin ’ Edition

Hello loves! ♥️

I recently asked for a compilation list of Nessian moments and there doesn’t seems to be one so I decided to hurriedly put one together before the release of “A Court of Silver Flames”. I have probably missed some scenes but these are the ones that I came across during my re-read. I will be making a post for each book and will link them once available:

A Court of Mist and Fury

ACOMAF Target Exclusive Story uploaded by bookofademigod

A Court of Frost and Starlight

Sneak Peak at the end of A Court of Frost and Starlight

A Court of Wings and Ruin

Chapter 15

Nesta had been beautiful as a human woman. As High Fae, she was devastating. From the utter stillness with which Cassian stood beside me, I wondered if he thought the same thing. She was in a pewter-colored gown, its make simple, yet the material fine. Her hair was braided over the crown of her head, accentuating her long, pale neck—a neck Cassian’s eyes darted to, then quickly away from, as she sized us up and said to me, “You’re back.” With her hair styled like that, it hid the pointed ears. But there was nothing to hide the ethereal grace as she took one step. As her focus again returned to Cassian and she added,

“What do you want?”

But Cassian sauntered over to Nesta, a half smile spreading across his face. She stood stiffly while he picked up the book, read the title, and chuckled. “I wouldn’t have pegged you for a romance reader.” She gave him a withering glare. “And, again, why are you here?” She snatched her book from Cassian, who allowed her to do so, but remained standing beside her. Watching every breath, every blink. “Elain’s mate is here,” I said. And it was the wrong thing to utter in Nesta’s presence. She went white with rage. “He is no such thing to her,” she snarled, advancing on me enough that Rhys slid a shield into place between us. As if he, too, had glimpsed that mighty power in her eyes that day in Hybern. And did not know how it would manifest.

“If you bring that male anywhere near her, I’ll—”

“You’ll what?” Cassian crooned, trailing her at a casual pace as she stopped perhaps five feet from me. He lifted a brow as she whirled on him. “You won’t join me for practice, so you sure as hell aren’t going to hold your own in a fight. You won’t talk about your powers, so you certainly aren’t going to be able to wield them. And you—” “Shut your mouth,” she snapped, every inch the conquering empress. “I told you to stay the hell away from me, and if you—” “You come between a male and his mate, Nesta Archeron, and you’re going to learn about the consequences the hard way.” Nesta’s nostrils flared. Cassian only gave her a crooked grin.

Nesta only shook her head, turning toward the chair and her book. “I don’t care. Do what you want.” A stinging dismissal, if not admission that she still trusted me enough to consider Elain’s needs first. Rhys jerked his chin at Cassian in a silent order to leave, and as I followed them, I said softly, “I’m sorry, Nesta.” She didn’t answer as she sat stiffly in her chair, picked up her book, and dutifully ignored us. A blow to the face would have been better. When I looked ahead, I found Cassian staring back at Nesta as well. I wondered why no one had yet mentioned what now shone in Cassian’s eyes as he gazed at my sister. The sorrow. And the longing

Chapter 16 I cringed. “I guarantee Nesta is now guarding Elain. I think she might honestly kill him if he so much as tries to touch her.” “Not without training she won’t,” Cassian grumbled, tucking in his wings as he claimed the seat beside Mor that Azriel had vacated. The shadowsinger didn’t so much as look at it. No, Azriel just walked to the wall beside Cassian and leaned against the wood paneling. But Rhys and the others remained quiet enough that I knew to proceed carefully as I asked Cassian, “Nesta spoke as if you’ve been up at the House … often. You’ve offered to train her?” Cassian’s hazel eyes shuttered as he crossed a booted ankle over another, stretching his muscled legs before him. “I go up there every other day. It’s good exercise for my wings.” Those wings shifted in emphasis. Not a scratch marred them. “And?” “And what you saw in the library is a pleasanter version of the conversation we always have.” Mor’s lips pressed into a thin line, as if she was trying her best not to say anything. Azriel was trying his best to shoot a warning stare at Mor to remind her to indeed keep her mouth shut. As if they’d already discussed this. Many times. “I don’t blame her,” Cassian said, shrugging despite his words. “She was—violated. Her body stopped belonging wholly to her.” His jaw clenched. Even Amren didn’t dare say anything. “And I am going to peel the King of Hybern’s skin off his bones the next time I see him.”

Chapter 17 Not that there was much finery to bother with. I’d opted for my Illyrian leather pants and a loose, white shirt—and a pair of embroidered slippers that Cassian kept snorting at as we flew. When he did so for the third time in two minutes, I pinched his arm and said, “It’s hot. Those boots are stuffy.” His brows rose, the portrait of innocence. “I didn’t say anything.” “You grunted. Again.” “I’ve been living with Mor for five hundred years. I’ve learned the hard way not to question shoe choices.” He smirked. “However stupid they may be.” “It’s dinner. Unless there’s some battle planned afterward?” “Your sister will be there—I’d say that’s battle aplenty.” I casually studied his face, noting how hard he worked to keep his features neutral, to keep his gaze fixed anywhere but on my own. Rhys flew nearby, far enough to remain out of earshot as I said, “Would you use her to see if she can somehow fix the wall?” Hazel eyes shot to me, fierce and clear. “Yes. Not only for our sakes, but … she needs to get out of the House. She needs to …” Cassian’s wings kept up a steady booming beat, the new sections only detectable by their lack of scarring. “She’ll destroy herself if she stays cooped up in there.” My chest tightened. “Do …” I thought through my words. “The day she was changed, she … I felt something different with her.” I fought against the tensing in my muscles as I recalled those moments. The screaming and the blood and the nausea as I watched my sisters taken against their will, as I could do nothing, as we— I swallowed down the fear, the guilt. “It was like … everything she was, that steel and fire … It became magnified. Cataclysmic. Like … looking at a house cat and suddenly finding a panther standing there instead.” I shook my head, as if it would clear away the memory of the predator, the rage simmering in those blue-gray eyes. “I will never forget those moments,” Cassian said quietly, scenting or sensing the memories wreaking havoc on me. “As long as I live.” “Have you seen any glimpse of it since?” “Nothing.” The House loomed, golden lights at the walls of windows and doorways beckoning us closer. “But I can feel it—sometimes.” He added a bit ruefully, “Usually when she’s pissed at me. Which is … most of the time.” “Why?” They’d always been at each other’s throats, but this … yes, the dynamic between them had been different earlier. Sharper. Cassian shook his dark hair out of his eyes, slightly longer than the last time I’d seen it. “I don’t think Nesta will ever forgive me for what happened in Hybern. To her—but mostly to Elain.” “Your wings were shredded. You were barely alive.” For that was guilt—ravaging and poisonous—in each of Cassian’s words. What the others had been fighting against in the loft. “You were in no position to save anyone.” “I made her a promise.” The wind ruffled Cassian’s hair as he squinted at the sky. “And when it mattered, I didn’t keep it.” I still dreamed of him trying to crawl toward her, reaching for her even in the semiunconscious state the pain and blood loss had thrown him into. As Rhysand had once done for me during those last moments with Amarantha. Perhaps only a few wing beats separated us from the broad landing veranda, but I asked, “Why do you bother, Cassian?” His hazel eyes shuttered as we smoothly landed. And I thought he wouldn’t answer, especially not as we heard the others already in the dining room beyond the veranda, especially not when Rhys gracefully landed beside us and strode in ahead with a wink. But Cassian said quietly as we headed for the dining room, “Because I can’t stay away.”

Chapter 17 His focus shifted behind me before he replied—and Lucien shut his mouth. His metal eye whirred softly. I followed his glance, and tried not to tense as Nesta stepped into the room. Yes, devastating was a good word for how lovely she’d become as High Fae. And in a long-sleeved, dark blue gown that clung to her curves before falling gracefully to the ground in a spill of fabric … Cassian looked like someone had punched him in the gut.

Chapter 19 Something drew Cassian’s attention behind me. And even as his body remained casual, a predatory gleam flickered in his eyes. I didn’t need to turn to know who was standing there. “Care to join?” Cassian purred. Nesta said, “It doesn’t look like you’re exercising anything other than your mouths.” I looked over my shoulder. My sister was in a dress of pale blue that turned her skin golden, her hair swept up, her back a stiff column. I scrambled to say something, to apologize, but … not in front of him. She wouldn’t want this conversation in front of Cassian. Cassian extended a wrapped hand, his fingers curling in a come-hither motion. “Scared?” I wisely kept my mouth shut as Nesta stepped from the open doorway into the blinding light of the courtyard. “Why should I be scared of an oversized bat who likes to throw temper tantrums?” I choked, and Cassian shot me a warning glare, daring me to laugh. But I felt for that bond in my mind, lowering my mental shields enough to say to Rhysand, wherever he was in the city, Please come spare me from Cassian and Nesta’s bickering. A heartbeat later, Rhys crooned, Regretting becoming High Lady? I savored that voice—that humor. But I shoved that simmering panic down again as I countered, Is this part of my duties? A sensual, dark laugh. Why do you think I was so desperate for a partner? I’ve had almost five centuries to deal with this alone. It’s only fair you have to endure it now. Cassian was saying to Nesta, “Seems like you’re a little on edge, Nesta. And you left so abruptly last night … Any way I can help ease that tension?”

Chapter 22 The Carver purred to Cassian, “If I tell you a secret, warrior-heart, what will you give me?” Neither of us spoke. Carefully—we’d have to phrase and do this so carefully. The Carver stroked the shard of bone in his palm, attention fixed upon a stone-faced Cassian. “What if I tell you what the rock and darkness and sea beyond whispered to me, Lord of Bloodshed? How they shuddered in fear, on that island across the sea. How they trembled when she emerged. She took something—something precious. She ripped it out with her teeth.” Cassian’s golden-brown face had drained of color, his wings tucking in tight. “What did you wake that day in Hybern, Prince of Bastards?” My blood went cold. “What came out was not what went in.” A rasping laugh as the Carver laid the shard of bone on the ground beside him. “How lovely she is—new as a fawn and yet ancient as the sea. How she calls to you. A queen, as my sister once was. Terrible and proud; beautiful as a winter sunrise.” Rhys had warned me of the inmates’ capacity to lie, to sell anything, to get free. “Nesta,” the Bone Carver murmured. “Nes-ta.” I squeezed Cassian’s hand. Enough. It was enough of this teasing and taunting. But he didn’t look at me. “How the wind moans her name. Can you hear it, too? Nesta. Nesta. Nesta.” I wasn’t sure Cassian was breathing. “What did she do, drowning in the ageless dark? What did she take?” It was the bite in the last word that snapped my tether of restraint. “If you wish to find out, perhaps you should stop talking long enough for us to explain.” My voice seemed to shake Cassian free of whatever trance he’d been in. His breathing surged, tight and fast, and he scanned my face—apology in his eyes.

Chapter 23 “Would you be frightened of her, if Nesta was—Death? Or if her power came from it?” Cassian was quiet for a long moment. He said at last, “I’m a warrior. I’ve walked beside Death my entire life. I would be more afraid for her, to have that power. But not afraid of her.” He considered, and added after a heartbeat, “Nothing about Nesta could frighten me.”

Chaper 24 Mercifully, or perhaps not, Nesta’s retching filled the silence. Cassian gaped at Rhys. “What did you do?” “I asked him the same thing,” I said, crossing my arms. “He said he ��went fast.’ ” Nesta vomited again—then silence. Cassian sighed at the ceiling. “She’ll never fly again.” The doorknob twisted, and we tried—or at least Cassian and I did—not to seem like we’d been listening to her. Nesta’s face was still greenish-pale, but … Her eyes burned. There was no way of describing that burning—and even painting it might have failed. Her eyes remained the same blue-gray as my own. And yet … Molten ore was all I could think of. Quicksilver set aflame. She advanced a step toward us. All her attention fixed on Rhys. Cassian casually stepped in her path, wings folded in tight. Feet braced apart on the carpet. A fighting stance—casual, but … his Siphons glimmered. “Do you know,” Cassian drawled to her, “that the last time I got into a brawl in this house, I was kicked out for a month?” Nesta’s burning gaze slid to him, still outraged—but hinted with incredulity. He just went on, “It was Amren’s fault, of course, but no one believed me. And no one dared banish her.” She blinked slowly. But the burning, molten gaze became mortal. Or as mortal as one of us could be. Until Lucien breathed, “What are you?” Cassian didn’t seem to dare take his focus off Nesta. 

Chapter 27 Cassian had stationed himself by the doorway, I realized, to be closer to Nesta. To grab her if Amren decided she didn’t particularly care for where this conversation was headed. Or for any of the furniture in this room. Precisely why Rhys now placed himself on Amren’s other side—to draw her attention away from me, and Mor behind us, every muscle in her lithe body on alert. Cassian was staring at Nesta—hard enough that my sister at last twisted toward him. Met his gaze. His head tilted—slightly. A silent order.

Cassian casually slid Nesta behind him, his fingers snagging in the skirts of her black gown. As if to reassure himself that she wasn’t in Amren’s direct path. Nesta only rose onto her toes to peer over his shoulder.

Chapter 30 Both males went a bit still. But Azriel sketched a bow—while Cassian stalked for the dining table, reached right over Nesta’s shoulder, and grabbed a muffin from its little basket. “Morning, Nesta,” he said around a mouth of blueberry-lemon. “Elain.”

Cassian finished the muffin, licking his fingers. I could have sworn Nesta watched the entire thing with a sidelong glance. He grinned at her as if he knew it, too. “Ready for some flying, Nes?” “Don’t call me that.” The wrong thing to say, from the way Cassian’s eyes lit up. I chose that moment to winnow to the skies above the House, chuckling as wind carried me through the world. Some sisterly payback, I supposed. For Nesta’s general attitude. Mercifully, no one saw my slightly better crash landing on the veranda, and by the time Cassian’s dark figure appeared in the sky, Nesta’s hair bright as bronze in the morning sun, I’d brushed off the dirt and dust from my leathers. My sister’s face was wind-flushed as Cassian gently set her down. Then she strode for the glass doors without a single look back. “You’re welcome,” Cassian called after her, more than a bite to his voice. His hands clenched and slackened at his sides—as if he were trying to loosen the feel of her from his palms.

Chapter 31 In the terrible silence, Cassian hauled me out—toward the dim center of the pit. Nesta was standing there, arms around herself, eyes wide. Cassian only stretched out an arm for her. As if in a trance, she walked right to his side. His arms tightened around both of us, Siphons flaring, gilding the darkness with bloodred light.

Chapter 32 I wondered what had happened in those initial moments, when he’d found my sister. As if he’d read my thoughts, Rhys sent the image to me, no doubt courtesy of Cassian. Panic—and rage. That was all he knew as he shot down into the heart of the pit, spearing for that ancient darkness that had once shaken him to his very marrow. Nesta was there—and Feyre. It was the former he saw first, stumbling out of the dark, wide-eyed, her fear a tang that whetted his rage into something so sharp he could barely think, barely breathe— She let out a small, animal sound—like some wounded stag—as she saw him. As he landed so hard his knees popped. He said nothing as Nesta launched herself toward him, her dress filthy and disheveled, her arms stretching for him. He opened his own for her, unable to stop his approach, his reaching— She gripped his leathers instead. “ Feyre,” she rasped, pointing behind her with a free hand, shaking him solidly with the other. Strength—such untapped strength in that slim, beautiful body. “Hybern.” That was all he needed to hear. He drew his sword—then Rhys was arrowing for them, his power like a gods-damned volcanic eruption. Cassian charged ahead into the gloom, following the screaming—

Chapter 39 But Nesta was glancing between us all, her back still stiff, mouth a thin line. “Where is he?” “Who?” Rhys crooned. “Cassian.” I didn’t think I’d ever heard his name from her lips. Cassian had always been him or that one. And Nesta had been … pacing in the foyer. As if she was worried. I opened my mouth, but Mor beat me to it. “He’s busy.” I’d never heard her voice so … sharp. Icy. Nesta held Mor’s stare. Her jaw tightened, then relaxed, then tightened—as if fighting some battle to keep questions in. Mor didn’t drop her gaze. Mor had never seemed ruffled by mention of Cassian’s past lovers. Perhaps because they’d never meant much—not in the ways that counted. But if the Illyrian warrior no longer stood as a physical and emotional buffer between her and Azriel … And worse, if the person who caused that vacancy was Nesta … Mor said flatly, “When he gets back, keep your forked tongue behind your teeth.” My heart leaped into a furious beat, my arms slack at my sides at the insult, the threat. But Rhys said, “Mor.” She slowly—so slowly—looked at him. There was nothing but uncompromising will in Rhys’s face. “We now leave for the meeting in three days. Send out dispatches to the other High Lords to inform them. And I’m done debating where to meet. Pick a place and be done with it.” She stared him down for a heartbeat, then dragged her gaze back to my sister. Nesta’s face had not altered, the coldness limning it unbending. She was so still she seemed to barely be breathing. But she did not balk. She did not avert her eyes from the Morrigan. Mor vanished with hardly a blink. Nesta only turned and headed for the sitting room, where I noticed books had been laid on the low-lying table before the hearth.

Behind us, Amren murmured to Nesta, “Cassian has gone to war many times, girl. He isn’t general of Rhys’s forces for nothing. This battle was a skirmish compared to what lies ahead. He’s likely visiting the families of the fallen as we speak. He’ll be back before the meeting.” Nesta said, “I don’t care.”

Chapter 42 Nesta only lifted her chin. “I …” I’d never seen her stumble for words. “I do not want to be remembered as a coward.” “No one would say that,” I offered quietly. “I would.” Nesta surveyed us all, her gaze jumping past Cassian. Not to slight him, but… avoid answering the look he was giving her. Approval—more. “It was some distant thing,” she said. “War. Battle. It … it’s not anymore. I will help, if I can. If it means …telling them what happened.”

Mor sagged a bit, jewelry glinting with the movement, and went to take Cassian’s arm. But he’d at last approached Nesta. And as the world began to turn to shadows and wind, I saw Cassian tower over my sister, saw her chin lift defiantly, and heard him growl, “Hello, Nesta.” Rhys seemed to halt his winnowing as my sister said, “So you’re alive.” Cassian bared his teeth in a feral grin, wings flaring slightly. “Were you hoping otherwise?” Mor was watching—watching so closely, every muscle tense. She again reached for his arm, but Cassian angled out of reach, not tearing his eyes from Nesta’s blazing gaze. Nesta blurted, “You didn’t come to—” She stopped herself. The world seemed to go utterly still at that interrupted sentence, nothing and no one more so than Cassian. He scanned her face as if furiously reading some battle report. Mor just watched as Cassian took Nesta’s slim hand in his own, interlacing their fingers. As he folded in his wings and blindly reached his other hand back toward Mor in a silent order to transport them. Cassian’s eyes did not leave Nesta’s; nor did hers leave his. There was no warmth, no tenderness on either of their faces. Only that raging intensity, that blend of contempt and understanding and fire. Rhys began to winnow us again, and just as the dark wind swept in, I heard Cassian say to Nesta, his voice low and rough, “The next time, Emissary, I’ll come say hello.”

Chapter 44 “You’re insane,” I breathed to Tamlin as Varian bared his teeth. “Do you hear what you’re saying?” I pointed toward Nesta. “Hybern turned my sisters into Fae—after your bitch of a priestess sold them out!” “Perhaps Ianthe’s mind was already in Rhysand’s thrall. And what a tragedy to remain young and beautiful. You’re a good actress—I’m sure the trait runs in the family.” Nesta let out a low laugh. “If you want someone to blame for all of this,” she said to Tamlin, “perhaps you should first look in the mirror.” Tamlin snarled at her. Cassian snarled right back, “Watch it.” Tamlin looked between my sister and Cassian—his gaze lingering on Cassian’s wings, tucked in behind him. Snorted. “Seems like other preferences run in the Archeron family, too.”

Chapter 45 Rhys lifted a brow. “Your staggering generosity aside, will you be joining our forces?” “I have not yet decided.” Eris went so far as to give his father a look bordering on reproach. From genuine alarm or for what that refusal might mean for our own covert alliance, I couldn’t tell. “Armies take time to raise,” Cassian said. “You don’t have the luxury of sitting on your ass. You need to rally your soldiers now.” Beron only sneered. “I don’t take orders from the bastards of lesser fae whores.” My heartbeat was so wild I could hear it in every corner of my body, feel it pounding in my arms, my gut. But it was nothing compared to the wrath on Cassian’s face—or the icy rage on Azriel’s and Rhys’s. And the disgust on Mor’s. “That bastard,” Nesta said with utter coolness, though her eyes began to burn, “may wind up being the only person standing in the way of Hybern’s forces and your people.” She didn’t so much as look at Cassian as she said it. But he stared at her—as if he’d never seen her before.

Chapter 47 Helion paused his debating the wall to survey her carefully, as he had done earlier. Spell-Cleaver. That was his title. She surveyed him with her usual disdain. But Helion gave her the same bow he’d offered me—though his smile was edged with enough sensuality that even my heart raced a bit. No wonder the Lady of Autumn hadn’t stood a chance. “I don’t think we were introduced properly earlier,” he crooned to Nesta. “I’m—” “I don’t care,” Nesta said with a snap of her wrist, striding right past him and up to my side. “I’d like a word,” she said. “Now.” Cassian was biting his knuckle to keep from laughing—at the utter surprise and shock on Helion’s face. It wasn’t every day, I supposed, that anyone of either sex dismissed him so thoroughly. I threw the High Lord a semi-apologetic glance and led my sister out of the room. “What is it?” I asked when Nesta and I had entered her bedroom, the space bedecked in pink silk and gold, accents of ivory scattered throughout. The lavishness of it indeed put our various homes to shame. “We need to leave,” Nesta said. “Right now.” Every sense went on alert. “Why?” “It feels wrong. Something feels wrong.” I studied her, the clear sky beyond the towering, drape-framed windows. “Rhys and the others would sense it. You’re likely just picking up on all the power gathered here.” “Something is wrong,” Nesta insisted. “I’m not doubting you feel that way but … If none of the others are picking it up—” “I am not like the others.” Her throat bobbed. “We need to leave.” “I can send you back to Velaris, but we have things to discuss here—” “I don’t care about me, I—” The door opened, and Cassian stalked in, face grave. The sight of the wings, the Illyrian armor in this opulent, pink-filled room planted itself in my mind, the painting already taking form, as he said, “What’s wrong.” He studied every inch of her. As if there were nothing and no one else here, anywhere. But I said, “She senses something is off—says we need to leave right away.” I waited for the dismissal, but Cassian angled his head. “What, precisely, feels wrong?” Nesta stiffened, mouth pursing as she weighed his tone. “It feels like there’s this …dread. This sense that … that I forgot something but can’t remember what.” Cassian stared at her for a moment longer. “I’ll tell Rhys.” And he did.

Chapter 48 Nesta let out a breathy, sharp noise and surged from her chair. I lunged for her, nearly tripping over the skirts of my dress as she staggered back, a hand clutching at her chest. Another step would have taken her stumbling into the reflection pool, but Mor sprang forward, gripping her. “What’s wrong?” Mor demanded, holding my sister upright as her face contorted in what looked to be—pain. Confusion and pain. Sweat beaded on Nesta’s brow, though her face went deathly pale. “Something …” The word was cut off by a low groan. She sagged, and Mor caught her fully, scanning Nesta’s face. Cassian was instantly there, his hand at her back, teeth bared at the invisible threat.

Chapter 49 Nesta smoothed a hand down her dark dress. “What do I do now?” A purpose, I realized. Assigning her the task of finding a way to repair the holes in the wall … it had given my sister what perhaps our human lives had never granted her: a bearing. “You come with us—to Graysen’s estate, and then travel with the army. If you’re connected with the Cauldron, then we’ll need you close. Need you to tell us if it’s being wielded again.” Not quite a mission, but Nesta nodded all the same. Right as Cassian clapped Rhys on the shoulder and prowled toward us. He paused a foot away, and frowned. “Dresses aren’t good for flying, ladies.” Nesta didn’t reply. He lifted a brow. “No barking and biting today?” But Nesta didn’t rise to meet him, her face still drained and sallow. “I’ve never worn pants,” was all she said. I could have sworn concern flashed across Cassian’s features. But he brushed it aside and drawled, “I have no doubt you’d start a riot if you did.” No reaction. Had the Cauldron— Cassian stepped in Nesta’s path when she tried to walk past him. Put a tan, callused hand on her forehead. She shook off the touch, but he gripped her wrist, forcing her to meet his stare. “Any one of those human pricks makes a move to hurt you,” he breathed, “and you kill them.” He wouldn’t be coming—no, he’d be mustering the full might of the Illyrian legions. Azriel would be joining us, though. Cassian pressed one of his knives into Nesta’s hand. “Ash can kill you now,” he said with lethal quiet as she stared down at the blade. “A scratch can make you queasy enough to be vulnerable. Remember where the exits are in every room, every fence and courtyard— mark them when you go in, and mark how many men are around you. Mark where Rhys and the others are. Don’t forget that you’re stronger and faster. Aim for the soft parts,” he added, folding her fingers around the hilt. “And if someone gets you into a hold …” My sister said nothing as Cassian showed her the sensitive areas on a man. Not just the groin, but the inside of the foot, pinching the thigh, using her elbow like a weapon. When he finished, he stepped back, his hazel eyes churning with some emotion I couldn’t place. Nesta surveyed the fine dagger in her hand. Then lifted her head to look at him. “I told you to come to training,” Cassian said with a cocky grin, and strode off. I studied Nesta, the dagger, her quiet, still face. “Don’t even start,” she warned me, and headed for the stairs.

Chapter 51 On and on they went, until Devlon looked over Rhys’s shoulder—to where we stood. A scowl at Mor. A frown at me—wisely subdued. Then he noticed Nesta. “What is that,” Devlon asked. Nesta merely stared at him, one hand clamping the edges of her gray cloak together at her chest. One of the other camp-lords made some sign against evil. “That,” Cassian said too quietly, “is none of your concern.” “Is she a witch.” I opened my mouth, but Nesta said flatly, “Yes.” And I watched as nine full-grown, weathered Illyrian warlords flinched. “She may act like one sometimes,” Cassian clarified, “but no—she is High Fae.” “She is no more High Fae than we are,” Devlon countered.

Chapter 56 But Nesta had jolted to her feet, staring at Cassian, at the helmet he had tucked into the crook of his arm, the weapons still poking above his shoulder, in need of cleaning. His dark hair hung limp with sweat, his face was mud-splattered where even the helmet had not kept it out. But she surveyed his seven Siphons, the dim red stones. And then she said, “You’re hurt.” Rhys snapped to attention at that. Cassian’s face was grim—his eyes glassy. “It’s fine.” Even the words were laced with exhaustion. But she reached for his arm—his shield arm. Cassian seemed to hesitate, but offered it to her, tapping the Siphon atop his palm. The armor slid back a fraction over his forearm, revealing— “You know better than to walk around with an injury,” Rhys said a bit tensely. “I was busy,” Cassian said, not taking his focus off Nesta as she studied the swollen wrist. How she’d detected it through the armor … She must have read it in his eyes, his stance. I hadn’t realized she’d been observing the Illyrian general enough to notice his tells. “And it’ll be fixed by morning,” Cassian added, daring Rhys to say otherwise. But Nesta’s pale fingers gently probed his golden-brown skin, and he hissed through his teeth. “How do I fix it?” she asked. Her hair had been tied in a loose knot atop her head earlier in the day, and in the hours that we’d worked to ready and distribute supplies to the healers, through the heat and humidity, stray tendrils had come free to curl about her temple, her nape. Faint color had stained her cheeks from the sun, and her forearms, bare beneath the sleeves she’d rolled up, were flecked with mud. Cassian slowly sat on the log where she’d been perched a moment before, groaning softly—as if even that movement taxed him. “Icing it usually helps, but wrapping it will just lock it in place long enough for the sprain to repair itself—” She reached for the basket of bandages she’d been preparing, then for the pitcher at her feet. I was too tired to do anything other than watch as she washed his wrist, his hand, her own fingers gentle. Too tired to ask if she possessed the magic to heal it herself. Cassian seemed too weary to speak as well while she wrapped bandages around his wrist, only grunting to confirm if it was too tight or too loose, if it helped at all. But he watched her— didn’t take his eyes off her face, the brows bunched and lips pursed in concentration. And when she’d tied it neatly, his wrist wrapped in white, when Nesta made to pull back, Cassian gripped her fingers in his good hand. She lifted her gaze to his. “Thank you,” he said hoarsely. Nesta did not yank her hand away. Did not open her mouth for some barbed retort. She only stared and stared at him, at the breadth of his shoulders, even more powerful in that beautiful black armor, at the strong column of his tan neck above it, his wings. And then at his hazel eyes, still riveted to her face. Cassian brushed a thumb down the back of her hand. Nesta opened her mouth at last, and I braced myself— “You’re hurt?” At the sound of Mor’s voice, Cassian snatched his hand back and pivoted toward Mor with a lazy smile. “Nothing for you to cry over, don’t worry.” Nesta dragged her stare from his face—down to her now-empty hand, her fingers still curled as if his palm lay there. Cassian didn’t look at Nesta as she rose, snatching up the pitcher, and muttered something about getting more water from inside the tent. Cassian and Mor fell into their banter, laughing and taunting each other about the battle and the ones ahead. Nesta didn’t come back out again for some time.

Chapter 56

Nesta did not flinch at the clash and din of battle. She only stared toward one blackarmored figure, leading the lines, his occasional order to push or to hold that flank barking across the battle.

Chapter 57 Nesta laid a hand against her bare, rain-slick throat. Cassian began another assault on a Hybern captain—slower this time than he’d been. Now. I had to go now—quickly. I took a step away from the outlook. My sister narrowed her brows at me. “You’re leaving?” “I’ll be back soon,” was all I said. I didn’t dare wonder how much of our army would be left when I did. By the time I strode away, Nesta had already faced the battle once more, rain plastering her hair to her head. Resuming her unending vigil of the general battling on the valley floor below.

Chapter 61 I squinted at the watery light—the very last before true dark. When my vision adjusted… Nesta stood by the nearest tent, an empty water bucket between her feet. Her hair a damp mess atop her mud-flecked head. Watching us emerge, grim-faced— “He’s fine. Healed and awake,” I said quickly. Nesta’s shoulders sagged a bit. She’d saved me the trouble of hunting her down to ask her about tracking the Cauldron. Better to do it now, with some privacy. Especially before Amren arrived. But Mor said coldly, “Shouldn’t you be refilling that bucket?” Nesta went stiff. Sized up Mor. But Mor didn’t flinch from that look. After a moment, Nesta picked up her bucket, mud caked up to her shins, and continued on, steps squelching.

Chapter 62 Nesta still didn’t move. She could not use the bathtub, she’d told me. Because the memories it dragged up— Cassian said to her, “Nothing can harm you here.” He sucked in a breath, groaning softly, and rose to his feet. Azriel tried to stop him, but Cassian brushed him off and strode for my sister’s side. He braced a hand on the desk when he at last stopped. “Nothing can harm you,” he repeated. Nesta was still looking at him when she finally shut her eyes. I shifted, and the angle allowed me to see what I hadn’t detected before. Nesta stood before the map, a fist of bones and stones clenched over it. Cassian remained at her side—his other hand on her lower back. And I marveled at the touch she allowed—marveled at it as much as I did the mudsplattered hand she held out. The concentration that settled over her face. Her eyes shifted beneath their lids, as if scanning the world. “I don’t see anything.” “Go deeper,” Amren urged. “Find that tether between you.” She stiffened, but Cassian stepped closer, and she settled again. A minute went by. Then another. A muscle twitched on Nesta’s brow. Her hand bobbed. Her breath then came fast and hard, her lips curling back as she panted through her teeth. “Nesta,” Cassian warned.

Chapter 63 Cassian chuckled hoarsely, and looked to Nesta, who remained pale and quiet. What she’d seen, what I’d seen in her mind… The size of that army… “Eat or bed?” Cassian had asked Nesta, and I honestly couldn’t tell if he’d meant it as some invitation. I debated telling him he was in no shape. Nesta only said, “Bed.” And there was certainly no invitation in the exhausted reply.

Chapter 64 “We’ll get her back,” Cassian rasped from where he perched on the rolled arm of the chaise longue across the small sitting area, watching her carefully. Rhys, Amren, and Mor were meeting with the other High Lords, informing them what had been done. Seeing if they knew anything. Had any way of helping. Nesta lowered her hands, lifting her head. Her eyes were red-rimmed, lips thin. “No, you will not.” She pointed to the map on the table. “I saw that army. Its size, who is in it. I saw it, and there is no chance of any of you getting into its heart. Even you,” she added when Cassian opened his mouth again. “Especially not when you’re injured.”

Chapter 66 “Good,” Cassian said, glancing at Nesta. “If I end my life defending those who need it most, then I will consider it a death well spent.” Lord Devlon, for once, nodded his approval. I wondered if Cassian noticed it—if he cared. His face revealed nothing, not as his focus remained wholly on my sister.

Chapter 69 During the brief midday break in a large meadow, Nesta and I climbed inside one of the supply caravan’s covered wagons to change into Illyrian fighting leathers. When we emerged, Nesta even buckled a knife at her side. Cassian had insisted, yet he’d admitted that since she was untrained, she was just as likely to hurt herself as she was to hurt someone else.

Chapter 70 Nesta pushed herself onto her elbows, hair shaking free of her braid, lips bloodless. She heaved into the grass. Rhys’s magic shot out of him, arcing around our entire army, his breathing a wet rasp— Nesta’s hands grappled into the grass as she lifted her head, scanning the horizon. Like she could see right to where the Cauldron was now about to be unleashed. Rhys’s power flowed and flowed out of him, bracing for impact. Azriel’s Siphons flashed, a sprawling shield of cobalt locking over Rhysand’s, his breathing just as heavy as my mate’s— And then Nesta began screaming. Not in pain. But a name. Over and over. “CASSIAN.” Amren reached for her, but Nesta roared, “CASSIAN!” She scrambled to her feet, as if she’d leap into the skies. Her body lurched, and she went down, heaving again. A figure shot from the Illyrian ranks, spearing for us, flapping hard, red Siphons blazing— Nesta moaned, writhing on the ground. The earth seemed to shudder in response. No—not in response to her. In terror of the thing that erupted from Hybern’s army. I understood why the king had claimed those rocky foothills. Not to make us charge uphill if we should push them so far. But to position the Cauldron. For it was from the rocky outcropping that a battering ram of death-white light hurled for our army. Just about level with the Illyrian legion in the sky—as the Attor’s legion dropped to the earth, and ducked for cover. Leaving the Illyrians exposed. Cassian was halfway to us when the Cauldron’s blast hit the Illyrian forces. I saw him scream—but heard nothing. The force of that power… It shredded Azriel’s shield. Then Rhysand’s. And then shredded any Siphon-made ones. It hollowed out my ears and seared my face. And where a thousand soldiers had been a heartbeat before… Ashes rained down upon our foot soldiers. Nesta had known. She gaped up at me, terror and agony on her face, then scanned the sky for Cassian, who flapped in place, as if torn between coming for us and charging back to the scattering Illyrian and Peregryn ranks. She’d known where that blast was about to hit. Cassian had been right in the center of it. Or would have been, if she hadn’t called him away. Rhys was looking at her like he knew, too. Like he didn’t know whether to scold her for the guilt Cassian would no doubt feel, or thank her for saving him. Nesta’s body went stiff again, a low moan breaking from her. I felt Rhys cast out his power—a silent warning signal. The other High Lords raised shields this time, backing the one he rallied. But the Cauldron did not hit the same spot twice. And Hybern was willing to incinerate part of his own army if it meant wiping out a strength of ours. Cassian was again hurtling for us, for Nesta sprawled on the ground, as the light and unholy heat of the Cauldron were unleashed again.

Nesta had her brow in the grass as Cassian landed so hard the ground shuddered. He was reaching for her as he panted, “What is it, what—” “It’s gone quiet again,” Nesta breathed, letting Cassian haul her into a sitting position as he scanned her face. Devastation and rage lay in his own. Did he know? That she had screamed for him, knowing he’d come… That she’d done it to save him? Rhys only ordered him, “Get back in line. The soldiers need you there.” Cassian bared his teeth. “What the hell can we do against that?”

Chapter 72 Rhys made to shoot me back down to the ground, where Amren and Elain were still waiting. Nesta said, “Wait.” Rhys obeyed. Nesta stared toward that armada, toward our father fighting in it. “Use me. As bait.” I blinked at the same moment Cassian said, “No.” Nesta ignored him. “The king is probably waiting beside that Cauldron. Even if you get there, you’ll have him to contend with. Draw him out. Draw him far away. To me.” “How,” Rhys said softly. “It goes both ways,” Nesta murmured, as if my mate’s words moments before had triggered the idea. “He doesn’t know how much I took. And if … if I make it seem like I’m about to use his power … He’ll come running. Just to kill me.” “He will kill you,” Cassian snarled. Her hand clenched on his arm. “That’s—that’s where you come in.” To guard her. Protect her. To lay a trap for the king. “No,” Rhys said. Nesta snorted. “You’re not my High Lord. I may do as I wish. And since he’ll sense that you’re with me… You need to go far away, too.” Rhys said to Cassian, “I’m not letting you throw your life away for this.” I was inclined to agree. Cassian surveyed the depleted Illyrian lines, now holding strong as Azriel rallied them. “Az has control of the lines.” “I said no,” Rhys snapped. I’d never heard him use that tone with Cassian, with any of them. Cassian said steadily, “It’s the only shot we have of a diversion. Luring him away from that Cauldron.” His hands tightened on Nesta. “You gave everything, Rhys. You went through that hell for us, for fifty years.” He’d never addressed it—not fully. “You think I don’t know what happened? I know, Rhys. We all do. And we know you did it to save us, spare us.” He shook his head, sunlight glinting off that dark, winged helmet. “Let us return the favor. Let us repay the debt.” “There is no debt to repay.” Rhys’s voice broke. The sound of it cracked my heart. Cassian’s own voice broke as he said, “I never got to repay your mother—for her kindness. Let me do it this way. Let me buy you time.” “I can’t.” I wasn’t sure if in the entire history of Illyria, there had ever been such a discussion. “You can,” Cassian said gently. “You can, Rhys.” He gave a lazy grin. “Save some of the glory for the rest of us.” “Cassian—” But Cassian asked Nesta, “Do you have what you need?” Nesta nodded. “Amren showed me enough. What to do to rally the power to me.” And if Amren and I could control the Cauldron between us… That distraction they’d offer … Nesta looked down to Elain—our sister monitoring the bloodbath ahead. Then to me. She said quietly, “Tell Father—thank you.” She wrapped her arms tightly around Cassian, those gray-blue eyes bright, then they were gone.

Chapter 74 Nesta surged to her feet, staggering across the clearing, blood at her mouth from where he’d hit her, and threw herself to her knees before Cassian. “Get up,” she sobbed, hauling at his shoulder. “Get up.” He tried—and failed. “You’re too heavy,” she pleaded, but still tried to raise him, fingers scrabbling in his black, bloodied armor. “I can’t—he’s coming—” “Go,” Cassian groaned. Her power had stopped hurling the king across the forest. He now stalked toward them, brushing off splinters and leaves from his jacket—taking his time. Knowing she would not leave. Savoring the awaiting slaughter. Nesta gritted her teeth, trying to haul Cassian up once more. A broken sound of pain ripped from him. “Go! ” he barked at her. “I can’t,” she breathed, voice breaking. “I can’t.” The same words Rhys had given him. Cassian grunted in pain, but lifted his bloodied hands—to cup her face. “I have no regrets in my life, but this.” His voice shook with every word. “That we did not have time. That I did not have time with you, Nesta.” She didn’t stop him as he leaned up and kissed her—lightly. As much as he could manage. Cassian said softly, brushing away the tear that streaked down her face, “I will find you again in the next world—the next life. And we will have that time. I promise.” The King of Hybern stepped into that clearing, dark power wafting from his fingertips. And even the Cauldron seemed to pause in surprise—surprise or some … feeling as Nesta looked at the king with death twining around his hands, then down at Cassian. And covered Cassian’s body with her own. Cassian went still— then his hand slid over her back. Together. They’d go together. I will offer you a bargain, I said to the Cauldron. I will offer you my soul. Save them. “Romantic,” the king said, “but ill-advised.” Nesta did not move from where she shielded Cassian’s body.

Chapter 80 My sister had barely spoken, barely eaten these past few days. Had not visited Cassian in his healing bed. Still had not talked to me about what had happened.

- END - 

[sworn-unbeliever]

29 - Paternal

((Last night I thought to do a prompt about Teremy’s Dad and the Nunhship that never got off the ground, I had a dream about exactly what I imagined to happen, and then the prompt is ‘paternal.’ It’s fate. Also, this post for context about Teremy and his father’s somewhat non-existent relationship.))

wc: 1,330

“Your so-called Nuhnship is useless. It’s your territory that we’re after.” snarled a voice from down below.

Or so Teremy heard. He looked down to see a circle of miqo’te surrounding one victim in the middle. Sensing danger, Teremy flew lower to overhear the conversation better. Not that the mob circle or the victim in the middle paid any heed to the lone visitor up above. The hungry baby elephant could wait.

“Then why would you fine gentlemen bother to waste your time on someone you deem useless?” The miqo’te in the middle spread his arms wide. “Surely you have plenty of true Nunhs to challenge for the right if you deem them so much more worthy. To take down a pack one must take down the strongest first to disperse the weak, isn’t that correct?”

Teremy squinted. His eyes may deceive him, but his ears sure didn’t. While Teremy didn’t recognise the miqo’te in the mob circle, he, unfortunately, recognised the one in the middle from audio alone. Now his sight confirmed his suspicions.

In the middle stood George Itsubishi. Useless Tia.

‘This is rich.’ Teremy thought. He had heard about his father’s failed Nuhn attempts and tenures from his mother years ago, back when Teremy had been stupid enough to talk to his family. From what little Teremy knew of tribe dynamics, at the very least, George would have one or two men near him. But no. Nowhere in the vicinity stood life. Just George himself. Part of Teremy wanted to jump down immediately and help. The other half wanted to sit and watch. Years had past since Teremy last saw him. Did Useless Tia learn to fight after all these years? In the end, the part that laid witness wanted to watch. After all, George did accuse Teremy of jumping into the thick of things without thinking. Teremy had the capability to behave once in awhile.

“Regardless, you’re all alone with no one to help you,” said another miqo’te, walking closer towards George. “And it looks like the only one left spoken for is the weakest of the weak.”

George glowered. “You may think so, but a true fighter doesn’t bare their fangs unless necessary.”

The circle closed in. This looked bad. Teremy clutched his dark lanner in an attempt to fly down.

‘Why bother?’ asked a cynical voice in Teremy’s head. ‘All he ever did was put you down. Lie to you about your family for no reason other than to pick on you. You see the way he treats mother. Why stick your neck out for someone like that?’

Teremy had no immediate answer. ‘I…’

The first aggressor stood up close and personal in George’s face. “Then how about you show those fangs instead of barking behind your invisible fence?”

“I see no value in attacking someone who needed a posse to win a one on one fight,” said George.

The answer? A swift punch to the jaw.

Teremy’s instincts jerked him over, ready to pounce. The cynical voice in his head stopped him by a mere shaking of his head.

A posse of the aggressor’s circle shoved George back in across the slowly shrinking circle. Another pushed George back. Then another. George took a swing. Easily telegraphed, all momentum yet no force. The aggressor punched back.

Teremy had seen enough. He shoved aside that cynical side of him that told him not to care. As much as Teremy hated his father, he hated being a passive bystander even more. He clenched a fist. ‘Dammit, Useless Tia! Why do you have to be so damn… useless?!’

Without waiting for his dark lanner to land, Teremy vaulted off of the bird’s back, channeling his qi into his feet. He slammed into the ground with a ground-shaking thud—cats always landed on their feet. Cracks in the ground formed where Teremy landed. Arm of the Destroyer. Everyone in the vicinity teetered off balance but they still remain standing.

Sweeping George to the ground before Useless Tia decided to try anything else stupid, Teremy faced the aggressor and raised his hands in his usual fighting stance—one fist close to his head, the other fist slightly forward with his elbow bent. “How about you pick on someone who can actually fight back?”

The miqo’te aggressor cracked his neck and his knuckles. “Who’re you?”

Teremy held his right fist in his left palm. The very air billowed around him as he charged his qi. “I just hate watching assholes pick on the helpless.” Feeling his battle aura sufficiently fired up, he swung his arms like a whip and summoned the power of wind through his fists. Another stance, flaring his qi into the form of a lotus blossom under his feet. The petals shattered and his aura power surged.

Taking advantage of the temporary surge in power, Teremy slipped his foot under George and flung his father straight up into the air to be seen again at some point in the near future. Hopefully long enough for Teremy to deal with these other losers.

A foot slammed into the ground to knock the gang off balance. A spinning kick with both legs extended like a whirling dervish to knock them out of the way. A leap in the air to vault out of the group’s middle and to the side, where the group lined up all too perfectly. Teremy stamped his foot on the ground and transferred energy to his hands, sending forth a wave of invisible energy that tore up the ground in front of him. The waves of rocks and debris collided onto the miqo’te. For good measure, as they fell, Teremy sent forth a large blast of invisible energy that collided with each member of the group. When they fell, they didn’t get back up.

Except for the initial aggressor. He still had some fight in him.

He charged towards Teremy with one last desperate stab with a blade. If only Teremy had his own gunblade onhand, he’d gladly show this guy a thing or two. Instead, the aggressor never knew what hit him, as Teremy easily sidestepped and slammed his own fist into the aggressor’s head. The other miqo’te fell to the ground, out cold. Seeing how easily this group went down, Teremy felt a small pang of guilt. But only small.

A shadow overhead quickly grew larger. Teremy held out his arms. His father fell neatly into his hands like a damsel in distress. Only Teremy put George back down on the ground before Teremy became the one too distressed from being near George alone.

The two now stood amid a sea of unconscious bodies. Teremy wished they were still conscious. At least he knew he could deal with random losers. Not this man standing before him. Yet, part of him wondered… had things changed? Had absence made the heart grow fonder? Would George say something nice for a change? Not as Teremy suddenly felt his heart beat anxiously in wait to hear George’s words.

“Oh, Teremy. I didn’t expect to see you here.” George said listlessly.

Silence.

Nevermind. No gratitude. Not even a single word of thanks. But no criticism either. Still, Teremy felt a wave of disappointment wash over him as though he had been hit by his own Rockbreaker.

“I waited this time,” said Teremy.

Silence.

“Did you need anything, Jeremy?” George asked.

Teremy closed his eyes and sighed. What did he expect. “Jeremy and Aunt Jocelyn are out on some grand adventure—” airquotes, “—remember? And no. You carry on your business. Sorry to waste your time.”

Whistling for his dark lanner, the purple-winged bird materialized out of thin air. George continued to stare at Teremy blankly as Teremy hopped on his bird’s saddle and flew away. No point in staying or waiting for George to answer. Teremy knew that George would never pat him on the head, and Teremy wasn’t in the mood to hear what George had to say.

[kilerya]

Magryn & Ona

here’s stuff about the two goddesses i made up (and who promptly took a life of their own), i was supposed to make an actual post but you know what, have the bulletpoint notes i made yesterday and then some more from today... under the read more cause it’s long

Magryn, goddess of oracles and tricksters -associated with magpies and has a lot in common with them -can see through their eyes, and see possible futures -very curious, about stuff and people -sometimes makes deal with people, help them with a thing and they serve her a while after their death -gets bored of people after a couple of decades on average and release them (or if they ask her) -they help look after her divine domain (large forest with a castle with very tall spires, keeps all her shinies there and gifts/sacrifices) -they go around the human world (usually in magpie form) to give messages/omens, cause mischief, steal shinies... -real magpies don't steal shinies, Magryn's birds who steal lots are a statistical anomaly and should not be counted -sometimes tag along when she goes around the human world, she loves parties and opportunities for mischief -very opportunistic especially for shinies or souls but also spite -actually a big softy but will plot your death if you tell her (unless you're Ona) -uses the environment to get back at people (gentle push make flowerpot fall on someone's head) or help people she likes -will pick fights with people/things bigger than her, but use all her tricks to beat them/scare them into surrendering -lots of people/things are bigger than her, has a big presence but actually smol -will give some 'luck' to people just cause she thinks they're entertaining -will ruin someone's day because she thinks they're an asshole -big soft spot for outcasts, tricksters and general chaotic good people -lots of spite for bullies, injustice and lawful evil people -technically has brown eyes but they go clear grey/blue when she looks through magpies' eyes or the future -which is 99% of the time, very few people see her brown eyes, very meaningful to have her full attention -does not have the best eyesight when not watching through birds cause it's very different and she's not used to 'human' eyesight -has medium brown skintone and long black wavy hair but has vitiligo so white patches of skin and white stripes in her hair -usually keeps her hair in a bun so it's less bothersome when flying but it's not a very tidy one -has wings, black and white like magpies, but usually keeps them hidden -wears backless dresses and shirts so they don't get torn when she spreads her wings -skirt of dresses are usually shorter at the front and long at the back -tends to go for flowy sleeves or no sleeves at all but always has a feathery short capelet that disappears into her wings when they're out -sometimes gives people a feather from the capelet, it's good to call for one (1) divine intervention from her -wears black and dark blue and green mostly(iridescent that looks black), with silver jewelry -will wear bright colored flower in her hair if Ona gives her one until it starts to wilt (can take months, divine flower) usually gets red -even bigger softy when her divine girlfriend is around, but will Hurt someone if they upset Ona -most likely to trick people into believing in her -very light cause hollow bones like a bird but packs a punch cause goddess -very rarely takes human lovers, not that interested anymore, only 'mortal' that she got really involved with recently (less than a hundred years) is one of her servant she didn't expect to keep so long -did not expect to get so attached to the idiot but he was entertaining and very persistent, is the mortal she's kept the longest so far, gets unexpected powers and character characteristic the longer she keeps him -very different relationship than with Ona, still very caring but different power dynamic, likes to boss him around and mess with him and he's really into that and very devoted -almost incapable of sitting properly, likes to perch on things -hoards her favorite human snacks whenever she or her servants make a trip to earth, recently that's ice cream, has yet to get bored of the never ending new flavours -does not hold her magic alcohol well, giggly trickstery drunk -has mixed opinions on australian magpies (different genus than hers entirely) so far wary respect is winning -will still pretend she can summon some to scare bad people who don't know their birds

Ona, goddess of plants and science (mostly medicine) -can grow anything anywhere, very proud of weeds that break through the sidewalk -no associated animals but is very fond of bees and hummingbirds -does not have a divine domain strictly separated from earth but has blessed plenty of earth spots -if a forest or field seems way too lush it's either fae or Ona, she's a lot nicer than the fae -will bless farms and gardens that are really well taken care of by people, giving really good harvest -in general likes plants more than people but will be nice to people who respect her domain -may cause a landslide to keep people from harming a forest -very supportive of people studying plants to help them survive the ever changing climate conditions -fascinated by all the uses people have found for plants over the millennia but especially natural medicine -will help people grow plants they need to make remedies and give them some divine inspiration to find new cool things -does not take servants but kind of adopts people sometimes while they're still living -is fond of children that take their first interest in botany and growing stuff -will keep their plants alive while they figure out how to properly care for them -big softy when it comes to things living in or near her blessed spots -will have trees move around to protect burrows or grow extra lush to hide nests -may drop a branch on a hunter's head... or a tree if they need more persuasion -but will provide convenient hollow tree and the like as shelter for well intentioned hopeless traveler -generally fond of well intentioned morons -also fond of artists and poets that make beautiful things about plants -has dark earthy skin and thick curly red and orange hair -and SO many freckles, on her face and body -they may or may not be seeds that make beautiful plants and trees that can never die -she's pretty sure Magryn made those stories up, but it's cute -will always have flowers braided in her hair -sometimes she uses those to make very special plants and trees -has amber eyes that go light when it's sunny and darker when it's rainy, very dark when it's snowing -her clothes look a lot like plants, sleeveless green tunic/dress that falls to her knees that has flowers growing on it -the flowers always change colors to fit her moods -also has vines going down her arms and legs, may grow thorns when she's angry -is tall and big, looks very soft and comfy, also very strong, big muscles -does not pick fights unprovoked but will end them -only metal she wears is trinkets Magryn gave her, golden shinies usually -she keeps the one she doesn't use buried under her favourite plants in her blessed spots -had very little in relationships with humans (because she already has a godly girlfriend and that's enough for her) -but likes women better whenever she gets tempted -is very big on symbolism with her gifts, especially flower meanings -makes alcohol from plants growing in her blessed spots, very strong magic alcohol, can get even gods drunk -will give it to Magryn and watch the chaos unfold, makes sure it's harmless chaos -is not good alcohol for humans to drink -walks barefoot while in nature but will wear shoes in cities/unnatural ground (asphalt, cement...) -or will have wild grass and flowers break through to walk on -rarely seen in temperate climates during winter except maybe evergreen forests -shows up every where warm all year long -likes to lay down on the tall grass or moss or forest/jungle floor and feel everything around -never sits straight, usually crosslegged or leaning on things, preferably trees -underwater plants are someone else's domain but she likes visiting them too

Things about about them together: -together very long, millennia -sometimes apart for long periods, by human standards -took some of each other’s habits or interests, Magryn is careful about her tricks not harming plants if possible, Ona uses vines to trip annoying people... -look after each other’s chosen humans -their domain/blessed spots have things for the other, Ona has lots of perching trees in hers, Magryn’s castle has plants growing on the walls everywhere -will show each other exciting new things, usually Magryn shows Ona new human inventions, and Ona shows Magryn interesting places her birds can’t get to -very cuddly, braid each other’s hair and stuff -courtship involved lot of gifts they thought the other would like -both go all soft and heart eyed listening to the other about their interest

[maiji]

“If you could pick 5 members to be on your team in the dark tournament, who would it be?”

So while I was going back through my archives trying to see if I had any incorrectly flagged content (I scrolled all the way to 2015, found three, and gave up/went to bed lol), I kept getting distracted and rereading old posts out of amusement. One of them was this 21 Questions Yu Yu Hakusho meme - and one question in particular made the gears of my brain clank so I thought hey, why not? Let’s answer it.

I'm going to tackle this question from two angles.

A) If I could pick ANY characters in Yu Yu Hakusho to form a team.

B) If I could only pick characters who appear during the actual Dark Tournament.

As soon as you see my first list, you'll understand why I was like, “oh.” and opted to do it again from B lmao.

(Oh yeah my tags spoil everything but oh well. Hope the rationale makes up for it hahaha)

VERSION A: Fun times

Raizen.

I'm sorry, the tournament is over now, thank you for coming. Seriously though, he's Yusuke with a million times more firepower and brains/experience. Also, one of the appeals of Yusuke is that he makes fighting fun, which is why everyone wants to go up against him. Raizen's friends express the exact same sentiment repeatedly. Raizen in his prime in battle would be a sight to see. He'd be all DID SOMEBODY SAY FIGHTING?? YEAH I'LL FIGHT ALL THE FIGHTS WAHOO and nobody would be able to get him off the arena platform. If there is an arena platform left. Or an arena. Or anything.

Enki.

Jolly uncle/all-round good dude, I love him. He also loves fighting, so he is also lots of fun. He seems much more cool-headed and practical than Raizen, and definitely takes the lead in coordinating the rest of Raizen's pals. Thus, he's a great wingman for Raizen. If you somehow actually manage to defeat Raizen- haha, what am I talking about? OK, if Raizen slept in or something, then you can fight Enki. And in that case the tournament is still over.

Kokou.

LOVES FIGHTING AND WILL KICK YOUR ASS. Even Enki was relieved he didn't have to face her. I firmly believe after Raizen she's the strongest - or at least one of the strongest - out of all of Raizen's already insanely powerful friends. Honestly, between Raizen and Kokou they'd probably just take everybody down, including each other, and have a blast. 

My perfect noodle husband Hokushin.

Obviously no one is surprised at this pick on my blog. Also loves fighting, plus super duper reliable, he's perfect support for anything. Along with Enki, he'd help temper Raizen and Kokou's wild party. And somebody needs to clean up after all the mess and make sure everybody gets first aid and whatever. Well, first aid for the other team they just massacred, I guess.

One more Raizen friend: Natsume.

We could put another one of Raizen's friends here, but I pick Natsume because we know a lot more about her and she's so badass and we should have more women. Also, because she's very clearly another great mashup of LOVES FIGHTING and NOT STUPID, as a fifth member, she can easily step in to fill any of the others' shoes, whether it's happily beat the crap out of everything in sight or be calm and strategize. If anybody ever actually needed to be filled in for some reason.

I call this amazingness Team Old People. IMO this team is flawless because they would just be so damn entertaining on so many levels. You have five extremely powerful and smart warriors with centuries of experience who have nothing to prove aside from sheer enjoyment of battle. Every one of them has expressed a passion for fighting because it's simply a joy for them, which means they wouldn't be playing it safe/boring. Seeing a master in action at practically anything is awesome, and not only that but they’d be willing to experiment and take risks and do things that are out there. A tournament is also a form of entertainment for the audience (both the real life audience and the one in the show), and that combined with their expert level combat skills means that I think they'd be so fantastic to watch. And all of them have distinct personalities that balance "I am an ancient demon with wisdom and stuff" VS "I love punching people (or getting punched) in the face!!" in different enough ways that they still offer really interesting character dynamics and interaction opportunities. And they would also be incredibly supportive of each other while still allowing for plenty of snark.

That said, FUN FUN FUN aside, the very obvious problem with this team is that they seriously break the question. And everything else. Even if they don’t intend to flat out obliterate everything, that’s what would probably happen, and that unfortunately can easily head towards its own kind of boring. Everyone would be like "why are we having a tournament, we're going home". So, we must leave Team Old People behind and move on to version B.

VERSION B: Serious business

Dark Tournament characters only. I will exclude members of the Toguro Team from my selection for obvious reasons. NO MORE FUN TIME. This is me pretending that I'm some rich underworld dude or whatever putting together a team I'm betting on to get through the tournament. You're going to see a clear pattern emerging from my picks.

Genkai.

The veteran. Intelligent, experienced, very powerful and pragmatic. I'd shell out big bucks to get her to come back to be my team's captain. No question for me, she's a must, even if all she does is sit on the sidelines and coach the rest of the team. With a group of serious, motivated and talented fighters, she'd be the best mentor and my team would be well-positioned to MAKE ME LOTS OF MONEY SO IN YOUR SMOKY SCARRED FACE SAKYO

Hiei.

Those who know me may find it shocking that I'm including Hiei but not Yusuke, Kuwabara, or Kurama. Hiei doesn't appear on my tumblr very often, and of the four main characters he's probably the one I'm least emotionally invested in. But if you're assembling a team for the Dark Tournament, you're IN IT TO WIN IT!! And Hiei is the best bet. I shall explain.

Hiei is efficient and effective, and his success ratio is the highest out of all Urameshi Team members - the most number of individual fights without a single loss or draw. Granted, he sits out for a chunk of the tournament, but he rarely appears worn out at the end of a fight. The only time he overexerts himself is against Zeru; after his recovery, he never seems to break a sweat. Even against Bui, he had no real issues. From a betting perspective, his odds are very, very good. Kuwabara and Kurama both experience multiple losses - Kuwabara often because he's young and overconfident or becomes so personally involved that he cares more for a positive outcome for other people than for winning; Kurama often because (as Hiei notes) he tends to overcalculate the situation and draw things out so long figuring everything out that it turns into a disadvantage. Yusuke's very strong and has huge potential, but he's also focused far too much on the experience. This makes his battles fun to watch but would give a strategist heart attacks. Many of his fights involve near-misses or less-than-ideal situations stemming from amateur errors. And finally, he gets dinged with a draw in his match with Jin, in part because his dawdling on the field made the deception feasible. Yusuke's great for drama and storytelling, not great for the comfort of my pocketbook. Having him on a team is risky when I know the other underworld bosses I'm competing against are not above using underhanded tactics.

As a result, based on a purely practical evaluation, Hiei is the most reliable choice. He's very focused on, and very good at, the one thing I want - DEFEAT THE OPPONENT UNEQUIVOCALLY. He comes in and tears people apart and there's no chance of an ambiguous referee call. He just needs his team members to be people he can respect to keep him in line. With Genkai as captain, that shouldn't be an issue. Nor with the rest of my picks.

Ryo (Kai in the anime) / M-3.

This is the Dr. Ichigaki member with the invisible claw powers. After their fight, he offers to be a replacement for the seriously injured Kuwabara (Yusuke appreciates it but has to turn him down because it's against the rules unless Kuwabara actually dies). He seems to be the strongest of the three students who were brainwashed by Ichigaki, and without Genkai's intervention and his own struggling against Ichigaki's mechanism, he would very likely have wiped out Kuwabara and Yusuke. He's extremely serious and dedicated, and with someone like Genkai steering the helm I think he'd go far. I'd be comfortable putting money on him. I also like him a lot and wish he had more involvement in the story - I've always felt that if Togashi didn’t need to get Koenma in for story purposes Yusuke hadn't been so freaked out and completely lost mentally when Genkai died, he probably would've asked Ryo to be the replacement fifth member. SOMEONE WRITE THIS

Touya.

Stronger than Gama, less arrogant than Risho, more reliable than Jin (who has many of the same problems as Yusuke), and Bakken sucks and will never be considered by anybody. Touya's powers are also very flexible. Somebody just needs to tell him to NOT TALK TO HIS OPPONENT. Don't talk to them, don't listen to them, don't let them distract you, don't let them get into your head, JUST GET IN THERE AND EYE ON THE PRIZE AND BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF THEM OKAY lol. I also think when Genkai was training everyone for Kurama, Touya was probably the one who gave her the least hard time. I mean, out of Touya, Jin, Chuu, Rinku, Suzuki and Shishiwakamaru who do YOU think would bellyache the least? I thought so.

The fifth member is actually a backup/alternate who doesn't necessarily see action (if you recall, this is why Chuu was mad). For my final pick, I took a while to decide, so I'll tell you about both of the last two people I was considering since I enjoy any excuse to talk about characters I don’t usually see mentioned.

5a is Zeru. 

OK, partly I considered him because nobody remembers him lmao - he was Hiei's first victory, obliterated into a shadow by Hiei's training-wheels Kokuryuuha. But if you look at my other picks, I think you'll appreciate why he's on my radar - he fits the profile of what I'm looking for very nicely. I want someone in control of themselves; who is a reliable, consistent, focused fighter unlikely to get distracted by other things; who clearly demonstrates power and is committed and has potential to grow really fast with the right direction/team captain. The only thing is that with Hiei already on the team, this may be duplicating the skillset and the mental profile a bit too much. And I think it's clear Hiei already has the upperhand in baseline power. So,

5b is Suzuki. 

His strength isn't fighting. It's his ingenuity in adapting, augmenting, and outfitting his team members with really good, really creative tools. He's honestly more a tinkerer and an inventor, imaginatively tweaking things to be even more useful, and whenever he realizes and accepts this about himself instead of trying to be just another fighter in the limelight, he'll be rich lmao. Anyways, this skill makes him a hugely valuable asset. I don't need him to be in the ring, I'm fine having him support with cool gadgets to amplify the rest of the team.

I HOPE YOU LIKED MY PICKS lol

[thesffcorner]

Corrupt by Penelope Douglass

Corrupt is an erothic thriller that’s part of the Devil’s Night series by Penelope Douglas. It mostly follows Erika, daughter to a rich family living in the affluent community in Thunder Bay, who three years ago was involved in an event that sent 3 of Thunder Bay’s most popular and prized boys to jail. Now, they are back, and along with Michael, their best friend and the man Erika has been in love with her entire life, they plan to destroy her and exact their revenge.

This book, is probably the most disappointing thing I have ever read. And I have a lot to say about it, so buckle up; it’s going to be a long review.

First off, this has probably one of the most intriguing premises I have come across in a while; 4 boys who are the richest, most powerful, popular and well protected in an already incredibly rich and affluent community pick one night a year where they do ‘pranks’ that go from stealing trucks to arson and assault, and get away with it, because even though everyone knows who they are, they are so protected by their own community, that they never have to face consequences. Except, because of Erika they do, and now they want revenge, and to complicated things, the one who didn’t go to jail is in love with her. And yet, this book fails to deliver on every possible promise of this premise, which is almost incredible.

PoV Issues:

First off, for whatever reason we have POV’s from both Erika and Michael, which completely takes the mystery out of the book. If the whole premise is Erika not knowing whether Michael likes/hates/wants to sexually assault her, it kind of defeats the purpose of the mystery if we can read exactly what he’s thinking. Having his POV grinds a lot of the book to a halt, and it’s not delivered particularly well either; there’s long stretches of the book where we don’t have his POV, while the ending is almost entirely him, making the book feel uneven; it’s like it can’t decide if he or Erika are the protagonists and as such, character development that should come at the beginning is saved for the very end, at which point I no longer cared.

Pacing and Length:

Second, this book is just way too long. It’s almost 500 pages, and it doesn’t utilize them well. We skip between 3 years ago and the present, and the 3 years ago sections were painful. Everything that happens in the school prior to the actual Devil’s Night is straight out of a poorly written YA book, complete with the ‘popular boy I like doesn’t notice me’ trope, the ‘I think I’m plain, but I’m secretly stunning’, and most infuriatingly dialogue so bad, not only do no teenagers actually speak like that, no humans speak like that.

This was doubly confusing to me, because the one thing Douglas does do well is the banter between the Horsemen (barf); their dialogue and jokes did sound convincingly high school and like boys pretending to be tough and unbothered, but unfortunately we get very little exploring their dynamic.

You’d think that a 500 page book would have time to develop the characters and really flesh out this plan and its intricacies, but no. Instead, we have one scene of MIchael and his dad arguing about trust funds and inheritance, another scene of the guys planning to do something to Erika’s mom (and us not knowing what they did for like 20+ chapters, even though WE CAN READ FROM MICHAEL’S POV), and the rest is just inane bits of I guess character development for Erika, which is delivered in the most blunt, uninteresting straightforward manner. It doesn’t help that in the past sections, it takes about 200 pages for things to actually start getting interesting, because the start is just Erika being tormented relentlessly by all the men around her, and her not standing up, and the present is her series of increasingly dumb decisions, and back and forth between her and Michael. The plot also peaks too early, and the following 100 pages just feel like they are a waste of time rather than building tension.

The Sex Scenes:

The pacing affects even the sex scenes. Some of them are ill placed, and others are so long and drawn out that even if you are reading this book for them, you will be bored out of your mind. Again, this book can’t decide if it’s a genuine erotic thriller with stakes and a plot, and the sex is supposed to play into that, or an erotica with some mild thriller elements. If it’s the former, then the fact that we have no sex for the first 200 pages, and then like 5 or 6 really long scenes near the climax of the thriller plot is not helpful, and neither is the fact that only 2 really contribute to the plot. If it’s the latter, then there are too few of them and they come too late in the book for anyone to care at that point. 500 pages is just too long for an erotic novel, and I was tapped out on caring about the sex by the second proper sex scene.

Writing and Dialogue:

This book is not written… well. Firstly, there are tons of overlong, flat and plain unnecessary descriptions; I don’t need to know the layout of Michael’s family house unless it will contribute to the plot, or every detail of Erika’s childhood if you won’t at least describe it with flare. The point of long descriptions in FP narratives is to give us insight into how the characters see and remember the world; they’ll describe things in their individual way and note what they find important. Here it’s just flat straightforward descriptions of actions or places that tell me nothing about Erika or Michael.

This same style of flat writing permeates the book even in the sex scenes; we get them both from Michael and Erika and they sound exactly the same, there is no difference. In general there is no difference between Michael and Erika’s voices; Michael mentions cocks and boobs more and wants you to know ‘Erika is mine’ and Erika is constantly thinking only about Michael and wants you to know ‘she belongs to no one, except no one is Michael’

She also has these long monologues about wealth, privilege, social pressures and differences between men and women, and it’s almost infuriating, because Douglas is so close to actually saying something meaningful about these things, but it never goes anywhere and it only serves to tell us that yes, Erika is rich, and yes, it sometimes bothers her, but no, she’d never give up the money, even though I guess she wants to feel like she’d survive without it. If it was written better and actually informed Erika’s character, it would be an interesting study of someone who grew up rich and learning how to make it on their own outside of their privileged environment, but like a lot of things, it goes nowhere.

Then there’s the dialogue. It’s bad. I won’t belabor the point, but I will just give you two examples: on page 28:

“Rika,” he lowered his voice, his brown eyes gentle “Baby you’re beautiful. Long blonde hair, legs that no guy in this school can ignore and he prettiest blue eyes in town. You’re gorgeous”

And on page 70:

“What about you?” I finally asked, making him stop. “Did prison change you?”

He turned, looking at me with eerie calmness “I guess we’ll see”

Lack of Genuine Darkness and Consequences:

Like that second example implies, this book is ‘dark’. Unfortunately, that’s probably the biggest missed opportunity. This is hard to talk about without SPOILERS, so skip this part if you still want to read this book.

We are told that Erika did something to put the guys in jail, possibly as revenge for something they did to her; moreover, their plan is to destroy her, which could mean anything. So I was excited to get some genuinely dark stuff, but unfortunately this book has a tendency to whitewash it’s characters, and nothing they do is actually that reprehensible.

First let’s talk about Devil’s Night. I didn’t mind that the pranks the guys pulled were mostly tied to property damage and theft, because, well they are high schoolers. The orgy/sex circle in the catacombs was just… dumb. I can’t imagine why high school students would be down to have sex in an actual CATACOMB in front of a live audience that just so happens not to have phones recording everything but whatever. The only prank the boys pull which is genuinely fucked up was burning the gazebo, but while I didn’t approve, it wasn't anything that was genuinely dark.

What the guys actually do to Erika was also weird. On the one hand, taking her for a ride in a forest and pretending to want to rape her, so they scare her to stay away from Michael is pretty fucked up. But on the other hand, they don’t actually do it, and since it was Trevor pulling the shots, they never even INTENDED to do it. Even Damon, the one guy from the Horsemen who actually participated in the act, had no intention of actually assaulting Erika, which she obviously didn’t know at the time, but it makes his actions much less sinister.

Then there’s Erika. She didn’t actually do it. That’s the big twist; what gets the boys in jail, isn’t actually anything she does. Instead it was Trevor, all along because there is only one true villain and he is Trevor. What lands Damon in jail is a video of him sleeping with the mayor’s daughter, which Trevor sends to the police. Since the girl is underage, it’s legally  not consensual and well… yeah. Again, we can argue all day about consent of minors, but in this book’s universe, Michael is fine for wanting to sleep with a 16 year old Erika, and the book makes sure to tell us that Damon did seduce and consentually sleep with the girl. Even more, the mayor actually hated Damon’s family and used this to destroy him and… can we whitewash Damon a little more please? I don’t think he’s quite saintly enough. He’s the only person who does something in the ballpark of reprehensible, and surprise he’s the other designated villain.

Will and Kai get caught on tape beating up a police officer. Bad, right? Well no, it turns out the police officer they beat up, abused his sister. How noble of them. They are such good people, they went to jail for Will trying to protect his crush (whose gazebo he burned down but… Will makes no sense as a character, don’t dwell on it).

Then the actual plan. First, Michael legally forces Erika’s mother into rehab, which is illegal, but not morally wrong since she is an alcoholic and in essence he’s forcing her to get help. Then Kai, Will and Damon burn down Erika’s house, which was the only part of this plan that I genuinely felt was horrible, but that’s only because we get the one good scene of Michael and Erika bonding over her collection of matches she keeps to remember her father.

Then, Michael takes over as the proprietor of Erika’s estate and freezes all her funds which is again, is a pretty dick move, but didn’t Erika want not to be shackled by her father;s money? Also this is just the last ploy to get Erika to go to the house where the boys are hiding so they can exact their true revenge which is…. To rape her. Maybe.

This part I was really confused by. It seems that’s what they want, but later we are told that they only really wanted to frighten her and make her feel as alone and afraid as they all did when they went to jail. Which again, whitewashes their actions, but even if they did genuinely want to rape her, the plan still makes no sense.

You are telling me that these men, spent 3 years in jail and the only thing that helped them survive it, is a plan to send Erika’s mom to rehab, freeze or destroy her material properties and then rape her? And then what? None of them seem interested in killing her, so do they just… hope she doesn’t go to the police? They all have criminal records, and one of them is probably in the database for sexual offenders! And then, when we find out what had actually happened, everyone just forgives everyone, except Travis the supervillain, who gets MURDERED IN COLD BLOOD.

Now, I want to be very clear. Nothing I say here is something I condone. I do not condone sexual violence, or really any type of violence that isn’t in self defense. But either commit to the characters or don’t damnit!

Commit to the boys assaulting Erika. Maybe don’t go all the way; have Trevor intervene and save her, and maybe he convinces her to use the videos on Will’s phone if you want her to not be solely responsible for sending them to jail. Then the threat of them being in town is genuine because they are actually dangerous people. I would 100% believe that the culmination of their plan is to rape her, if we know they’d done it before, and even more so because of what they had to go through while in prison. It also helps add conflict to Erika and Michael’s characters; he could slowly find out that there was a reason Erika sent them to jail and then he actually has to choose between his friends and her. Erika actually was willing to take justice in her own hands, since she would know first hand how the previous attempt she made to get a rapist to be punished went.

Which leads me to the lack of consequences. As soon as the truth comes out Erika immediately forgives the guys for literary destroying her life, and she especially immediately forgive Michael for not even stopping for a moment to make sure what they guys told him was true, and being willing to let them assault her! Then we have Damon, who gets stabbed, but then completely gets away with helping Travis orchestrate the joyride, assaulting Erika again, kidnapping her, and helping Travis try and kill her. He just fucks off to St Petersburg! (Side note, what kind of person thinks that Damon Torrence is someone who has Russian heritage?)

Travis, a whole mess of a character, kidnaps his ex so he can lure his brother and TRY TO KILL HIM, because his ex is in love with him. He orchestrates a possible rape so he can destroy the relationship between the boys and Erika, sends the boys to jail and why? No reason! And then, he gets shot and killed by Michael, and Michael GETS AWAY WITH IT. There is no trial, no jail time, not scandal in the papers about the son of the wealthiest man in Thunder Bay and a professional NBA BASKETBALL PLAYER killing his own brother! IN WHAT UNIVERSE? That part annoyed me even more than all the other things I mentioned before; there are no consequences and no motivation and this book FAILS as a thriller.

Characters:

Let’s start with actual supervillain Trevor. He is possessive, jealous, arrogant and willing to KILL HIS OWN BROTHER just because the girls he wants is in love with him. Why?

He seems to be their abusive dad’s favorite son, he’s arranged to marry Erika anyway, he gets all of her properties and money and managed to get rid of Michael’s friends. He has everything! All he had to do was just tell his father or Erika that the gang is back and planning something, and none of this would’ve happened. He even gets an evil monologue at the end and tells Erika Damon’s backstory, both of which were straight out of a Bond movie. I hated this stupid waste of a character when he could’ve actually been fleshed out and interesting.

Alex is a character that just exists so Erika isn’t the only girl in this book. There is a very weird and inexplicable implication that she’s attracted to Erika and is maybe bisexual and maybe Erika is bisexual that goes absolutely nowhere and I absolutely hated it. It doesn’t help that this book is weirdly homophobic in some other aspects, and the way all the characters, especially the men treat Alex was just awful.

Out of the three guys, Will was the one I understood the least. He’s an alcoholic and that’s where his character starts and ends. We never learn anything interesting about him, and he barely has 10 lines in total. He might as well not have been there.

Damon we’ve been over; he’s the one that I ended up liking the most, because he was the only actually morally corrupt and interesting character. He outright hates women, has a pretty intense backstory and severe mommy issues, and even gets some interesting dialogue with Erika. He’s the only one I might be tempted to read a book about, but only if it’s much shorter than this.

At first Kai was the most interesting of the group and was the biggest wasted potential. He is closed off, secretive and seems to be the most reasonable one, and I genuinely thought that his big secret was either going to be that he has been in love with Michael this whole time, or that he was also sexually assaulted in jail. We never find out what happened to him in jail, which is a shame, but again, since this is a series it probably something Douglas is saving for the second book. As for his relationship with Michael, without me spoiling anything, it’s exactly the twist with Wentworth Miller’s character from Loft, except if the pool scene actually had actually gone with Miller joining the rest. I never like this type of queerbaity twist, especially, because as I mentioned the representation of anyone who isn’t straight or white in this book is horrendous. 

Michael was both the worst character and the best developed one. I understood where his anger issues stemmed from, why he was so rude and abrasive to everyone, especially Erika and even the hatred he had for Trevor. I wish we actually had time to develop his relationship with Trevor and his father, and actually delved into why they hated each other so much, but we don’t have time for that in this hell. I thought since he was a basketball player, it would actually play a part, but it doesn’t; other than one line about him being distracted because of the plan, the fact that he plays for the NBA is completely irrelevant. His relationship with Erika was infuriating. He supposedly loves her and thinks she’s his match, but he treats her like shit; possessive, hypocritical, controlling and condescending. There is no reason he should have commitment issues but he has those too, and the fact that it takes Erika being in mortal danger before he tells her he loves her was INFURIATING.

Erika was no better. I again, foolishly believed that her being a fencer would have something to do with the plot but other than an excuse for two truly bewildering scenes it doesn’t. She was an incredibly feeble character and the more the book attempted to paint her as becoming this powerful player and ‘corrupt’ girl the more I got Ana Steele and Bella Swan vibes. She is not empowered nor strong; she is constantly pushed around, insulted, yelled at and even physically manhandled by everyone around her. The fact that none of the characters talk to or treat her like an adult, or know how to communicate at all was bewildering, and she herself was just dense. Not only does she make the stupidest decisions, she also multiple times fails to grasp really simple, obvious things and her wanting to be a sociologist because she liked reading people made me scream.

What’s most frustrating, is just like with Michael there are nuggets of a good character here and there; she is sometimes observant and clever, but mostly she just allows everyone to manipulate her and I couldn’t stand it.

Conclusion?

I do NOT recommend this book. It kept me reading only because I was curious to see what had actually sent the gang to jail and when I found out I was too far into the book to justify DNFing it. But it was not good and I have no desire to read any of the subsequent books by her, unless I hear that her writing has drastically improved (which judging by the blurb for Kill Switch, the book about Damon, it doesn’t seem like it).

goodreads

[lethesomething]

Hanamiya... ABO... thing?

So. The good news is, my creativity has somewhat come back, in the form of me spending the entire first half of the day furiously writing. The bad news is, it came back in the form of, uh, this. Which is a Hanamiya x reader weird short set in an omegaverse au. It’s not technically smut, but I wouldn’t call it SFW, either. I suppose it’s more on the angst/comfort scale, with a lot of sexual tension. I know I’m not selling this well, but I’m still trying to get over the fact that my brain handed me an omegaverse story and that I just went and wrote it.

Word count: 2320 !alpha Hanamiya x !omega reader Heat dynamics, Angst, Fear, Comfort, Sexual Tension, Thinly Veiled Rape Threats (no actual violence, sexual or otherwise)

You sit in the back of the tiny uni classroom, trying your best to hide. "Please just come and get me," you whisper into your phone.

Your boyfriend grunts, barely audible over the sound of people talking and some beat playing in the background. "Babe, I'm busy."

Frustration settles into hurt, but you try to keep your voice level. "Listen, I'm about to go in heat and I need you. I locked myself in a friggin classroom and I don't know if I'll make it to my apartment alive if you don't come over."

"Then why the hell did you go out?" he sighs, and his words cut like steel. "You should have just stayed home."

"I had classes," you say, voice going high with a mixture of anger and pain. "It came up a lot faster than I expected."

"It always happens faster than you expected," your boyfriend grumbles, "you always do this. You don't think it's gonna happen, because you don't fucking think. You're always trying to do things you shouldn't be doing."

"Well excuse me for trying to lead an actual life," you growl. Before you can say anything else, however, the call clicks off. You call back. No answer.  Panic rises in your throat and you're left to stare at your phone, numbly watching the animation of a call failing to be connected. You realise that he's left you hanging, but it takes a few seconds before it fully sinks in. You're alone. He left you to deal with this by yourself.

You shift and focus on your breathing as you feel a first wave of heat hit you. It runs a shiver down your skin, electricity racing from the top of your head all the way to the ends of your fingers and toes. You clench your abdominal muscles, stifling a low moan.

It is pure, unfiltered desire coursing through you and it is an absolute bitch right now. You're pretty sure you can sense a group of people gathering, just outside the door. You're hoping it's just your fevered imagination but experience, science even, says otherwise.  Your body, treacherous thing it is, is giving off a sweet, wanton sort of scent, a desperate plea for attention that makes people around you stand to attention. It speaks of untapped potential, of willingness, submissiveness and in any alpha near you it leads to a hunger that's hard to fight against. Whoever came up with this biological marvel was an asshole, you think. You take a breath to compose yourself and spray deodorant in front of you in an effort to at least mask some of your scent it. It's useless, probably, but what else can you do. You already know it's gonna get a lot worse before it gets better, and unless you can find release, you're basically stuck here all night.

"You alright in there?" Someone tries the door handle. Thank god for locks. "Go away, I'm fine!" "You sure about that?" It's a second voice, and it sounds leery. "Get the fuck away!" You briefly ponder calling your parents. Never mind that they're in Osaka and you're studying in Tokyo. How long would it take them to get here? A few hours? Do you even have that long? Clicking around your phone, you search for something like a help line for desperate omegas. An intervention team for people in heat. Surely something like that exists.

The sounds of a disturbance by the door take your attention away from googling. You hear a shuffle, and a curse, the kind of aggression that doesn't bode well. And then, in the silence that follows: a click. Someone picked the god damn lock. You look around for an escape, a closet to hide in, a window to jump out of, even if it's three stories down. But your body is far from done betraying you. You freeze, left to sit on a table near the back wall, as the door slowly opens.

You can smell him, long before you see him. A cloud of scent that proclaims, without hesitance, that he owns the place. It smells of power, of danger, of arrogance. It smells like trouble and your body responds by aching for it. A thrill sparks through your veins and you clench once more, biting your lip. Then the last person you want to see walks through the door, sporting a dark smirk and trailing a cloud of dominance.

"Hanamiya?"

You're lost in a maelstrom of hormones, flitting between desire and fear. You know, you are almost certain, that he'll hurt you if he comes close, and still part of you yearns for it, every back-stabbing hormone in your body screaming to be fucked, no matter the cost. The more lucid part of you grips the hard wood of the table and scoots back against the cool wall. If you could only lose some of the heat radiating off you, you might be able to think.

With an icy calm Hanamiya closes the door behind him and locks it again, pushing back anyone who still dares linger in the hallway, in that stifling cloud of authority.

You swallow hard, sweat gathering in the dip of your sternum, a drop racing down the middle of your chest.

He crosses the room like a villain boarding a conquered ship, long strides taking him right in front of the table, where he stops. Eyes the colour of milk coffee look down at you, taking in the flush of your cheeks, the twitch in your legs, the sheer desperation in your scent. His lips curl into a dangerous smile. "Well, well, __-san. Aren't you in trouble?"

You try to speak but the words die in your throat as he bends down, one hand resting on table next to you.

"They say it's dangerous for little omega's to go out when they're in heat. Makes people crazy, you see."

You press yourself against the wall, lips involuntarily parting.

"And that deadbeat boyfriend of yours? I saw him maybe half an hour ago. Going off to some party."

A knot forms in your chest. It feels like a lie. The kind of cruel thing Hanamiya would say to get a rise out of you. But you're fairly certain it's true, and that hurts all the more.

"Your alpha's not coming to help you, is he?" Hanamiya says, voice deep with mock pity. "He abandoned you."

You shake your head, desperate to protest.

"Pathetic," he says, looking down his nose at you. He stills for a moment, apparently savouring the way you squirm and struggle to hold yourself together before him. "It's a pity, isn't it," he finally murmurs. "Such a sweet smell too. There's a group of people outside just bucking to take care of you."

You grip the desk harder, shaking your head vehemently as a cold dread grips you.

  Hanamiya's face folds into something akin to amusement and he reaches out a hand. Slowly, he brushes a stray lock of hair from your cheek, a touch that, despite the fear, despite the panic, runs a shiver of pleasure through you. His eyes twinkle with mischievous joy as he continues, his finger tracking the edge of your jaw from your ear down to your chin.

It takes everything in you to stifle a mewl, your eyelashes fluttering as you grip the desk harder. You want to wrap your legs around him. You want to cling on and beg him to fuck you, devour you whole if he needs to. Much as you hate the thought, your skin crackles with a need to be touched and he knows. God, does he know. You can see it in the burning of his eyes, the darkness of his smile.

"If only there was some other way," he coos, pinching your chin between his fingers. "Shall I do you a favour, __? Shall I relieve you of this little problem of yours, hmmm? If you beg, I just might." He pushes your chin up, eyes boring into yours as he leans closer.

You force yourself to look away, focussing instead on the way his hair falls off his shoulders when he leans forward, black silk draping down, and you try to find your voice. When it finally comes, it's in the form of a desiccated whimper. "Please," you whisper, and your throat contracts around the word, impossibly dry.

 "Oh?" he hums, lowering his eyes to look at you almost fondly. "Could you repeat that? I didn't quite catch it."

 You swallow and try again. "Please don't," you croak.

  His eyebrows knit together and his tongue clicks, any semblance of warmth gone from his face in an instant. With a sigh, he pushes off of the table and rights himself, hands casually shoved in his pockets. "Stubborn little thing." He turns his back and starts to walk out while you gulp air like a shipwrecked sailor washing up on the shore.

"Hanamiya, wait!" You're not sure what compels you to ask him, of all people, to help you. Perhaps it's because in the two years since you started university , you have come to admire his intelligence, if not his attitude. Perhaps you are desperate, in that moment, to believe that he could at least be bargained with or perhaps it's simply because he isn't actively trying to rape you and you're at the point where you consider that a good sign.  Whatever it is, you can only try, and hope. "Please, Hanamiya, I…"

He turns around, curious. "You what?"

You slump. "I don't know what to do," you mutter. The sheer amount of emotions and chemicals fighting inside of you are taking their toll, and the energy it took to keep yourself together is running dry. "I don't know what to do," you repeat, and the way he looks at you makes any hope you had pack up and flee. "My heat just keeps coming," you say, pushing through your distress. "For normal people it's every three months, just a few days, but with me it's non-stop."

Cold clay eyes regard you, and Hanamiya's face folds into something like disgust.

It's not enough to silence you, however, the words that have taken so long to get through your throat are turning into a stream, a geyser laid dormant too long. "No matter how many suppressors I take, no matter what my boyfriend does," you babble, unhindered by the fact that Hanamiya could probably not care less. "I know I'm supposed to just stay home but I don't want to live my entire life indoors like some caged bird, so you can call me stupid for coming out here when it's dangerous but apparently that's a risk I'm willing to take. I've been fighting this shit for so long, and I'm so tired and if I can just make it home, I could..." You don't know when the tears started, but they're very definitely here now, stinging your eyes and adding to the humiliation of whatever spectacle you're already making of yourself. Frustrated, you wipe at them with clammy fingers. "I just

…"

"God, stop whining already." Hanamiya folds his arms and rolls his eyes. "You're a mess, I get it." He takes a step closer and, without warning, slides his fingers in your hair. You gasp at the rough treatment, but he pays it no mind, pulling your head to the side without a word. Then he licks his thumb and dabs it on your pressure point.

"W-what are you doing?" you squeak, startled. The air around you has changed, a musky scent overpowering everything else in the room. It's not unpleasant, but it's confusing, adding to the whirlwind of smells and emotions already raging around you until it mixes and turns into something else, something almost soothing.

"I'm claiming you," Hanamiya says, simply, pushing your head up again. "Putting a big old 'property of Hanamiya Makoto' sign on you that no one in their right mind is going to ignore." He grins at your shocked face, his voice dropping a tone as he brings his face closer to yours. "You're mine."

Pure adrenaline courses through your veins and you blink up, trying to make sense of it. His hand in your hair causes static electricity all over your scalp, making it hard to think. You're a whirling sea, battered by storms but you manage, somehow, to speak. "I'm not."

  He lets go of your head with a dark chuckle. "My, you're high maintenance. No wonder your boyfriend gave up on you." You give him a hurt look, but he ignores it, instead reaching into his jacket pocket. "Make no mistake, __-chan. I don't do favours without cashing them in. You will be required to pay me back." He pulls out a small spray can and hands it to you. "That scent mark will last for about half an hour. You'd better start running."

Blatantly confused now, you look at the can in your hand. Pepper spray. "And this?" you ask.

 "That's for if you don't run fast enough." He grins and turns again. Walking toward the door.

"Uh… thanks," you say.

"Just remember that you owe me." And with that, he opens the door and strides out, not looking back. In the open doorway, you can see the dark figures of a few stragglers, still lingering in the hallway.

  With a deep breath, you slide off the table and onto wobbly feet. You take a moment to find your balance, and then you grab your bag and secure it around your shoulder, trying your best to stay upright and exude confidence. You clutch the pepper spray in your hand and mentally brace yourself before you finally take a step toward the door. The alpha’s outside lean back as you approach, and you rigidly pass by them, feeling like a deer surrounded by wolves. Swallowing hard, you keep walking, slowly, deliberately, down the hallway, until you round a corner.

Then you break into a run.

[dothewrite]

breaking down my volleyball squad into thought-sized pieces

In a way, you could treat this as a character analysis. Perhaps even as unpopular headcanon, but here are some of my thoughts on the personalities of my favourite Haikyuu characters, past the first, second and third layer into their depths. Not entirely pulled out of my ass, these are just thoughts I’ve gathered from observing them in both anime and manga. Am I right, or am I wrong? There’s no answer, but you’re free to disagree.

Kuroo Tetsurou.

He’s my absolute favourite, but I’m not above picking at his flaws- one of the biggest reasons why I love this character so much. There’s so little revealed in the anime or manga, usually just as the ‘Captain’ or ‘Rival’ figure, but there’s so much underneath that gets glossed over very easily.

How much strength does it take for someone to pull together (and lead) a team that seems to be a gathering of strange misfits? Through in-game dynamics they seem to flow seamlessly, but if you think about it- the personalities of these people wouldn’t be the type to click together in a classroom or anything. Who binds them all? It’s Kuroo. There’s this solid, grounded feeling to him, when he needs to be. The keyword being need.

I have absolutely no evidence of anything I’m going to say next, but it’s a general feeling. Anyone with such prowess at provoking people, yet managing to admit their mistakes (e.g. pissing off Tsukishima), there’s definitely something. To me, Kuroo feels like the type of character that’s been there. He knows what to say, what parts hurt the most and when he needs to apologize because he’s said all these things to himself a thousand times in his head. He remembers the time when he chose not to apologize, or was too afraid to, and the consequences stung afterwards. He’s not a natural born genius at anything, but he has talent, and he’s honed his personality to fit what he has, over time, come to expect for himself. Kuroo Tetsurou knows what kind of person he doesn’t want to be- not necessarily the person he wishes to be- and he works to avoid it.

There’s a solid determination to him that’s malleable. He doesn’t seem to be made out of steel and rock, like Daichi, and he’s not insanely inspirational, like Oikawa. He’s just... him, and he rises to the challenge the best he can when it’s posed to him. He’s not the type to be different on and off court either- I think he just tackles everything with the same frame of mind ‘to do his best, and to solve the problem’. Amidst his moments of insecurity alone, where he probably sits on his bed in his room and wonders what he’s doing with his life and if he’s really good enough, he brushes all those away because he knows that it’s not important. Things he can’t change aren’t important, and what he can do is make the best of things. He doesn’t believe in himself as much as other people thinks he does, and he’s nowhere near as cocky when he’s being truthful, but the thing is, he’s okay with magnifying those aspects of himself when it makes things easier, when it makes people happier. He’s not lying, not pretending to be someone else he’s not, but there are things he exaggerates because it’s better for everyone. I wouldn’t say that he’s untrusting, or untruthful. In fact, he seems like the type to, if he decides you’re a decent person, to answer all the questions you ask him depending on your motive (he’s not going to tell you anything that will affect your performance, e.g. his teammates).

To me, what’s most admirable about Kuroo is the fact that he seems like the type to have moments where he falters, where he doesn’t think he can do it anymore, but he picks himself up, or asks for help when he needs it (thank god for Kenma), and he keeps going. It’s this sense of persistence and a combination of wicked humour and a laissez-faire attitude that keeps him sane, that makes him who he is. So, where does his confidence come from? Is it genuine? Absolutely. He has the ability to be the best middle blocker, he has the ability to rise up to life’s challenges as they come. He knows this, and that’s what makes him confident. He’s quite fine with the kind of person he is right now, and that is more than enough for him to go on.

Bokuto Koutarou.

This boy is probably youth personified. There’s so many people who reduce him to the ‘happy-go-lucky’ character, and it’s such a shame that neither the anime nor manga fleshes out his character much. Bokuto is so much more than just happy. This is a guy who has actually fought for happiness- and for that, you have to choose happiness first, and that’s a difficult choice to make. So many people with any sort of ambition chases it for their own reasons, sometimes it’s success, sometimes it’s fame, sometimes it’s glory and sometimes it’s pride, but I think that because Bokuto has never griped about not being ‘the best’, he honestly plays volleyball because he wants to enjoy the sport for what it is. He wants to feel happy and excited when playing it- and what did he do when he wasn’t feeling that in his junior years? He just kept on practicing, until he finally, finally said ‘volleyball is fun’.

Don’t mistake me, Bokuto has heaps of ambition. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be practicing so much, wouldn’t be fighting so hard for nationals and groaning about Ushiwaka. He just wants to be good! He doesn’t need to be better than everyone else, he wants to get to Nationals because being good is fun, beating people is fun, and everything is just fun. He’s not proving anything to anyone. Would you agree?

Just because someone likes having fun, doesn’t mean they’re utterly high on excitement all the time. In fact, solid practicing until he enjoys it is what Bokuto says, not any other character. Who gave the speech to Tsukishima? Bokuto. Life hasn’t been all great for him, and the fact that he’s able to say all this, to advise someone is because he’s been there too. He’s overcome those obstacles with who he is and his work ethic, and now he’s in a better place to be the happy guy he is. Unless it’s because of sheer luck, there is no character who can be happy-go-lucky and have things go perfectly for them, because then that’s either a comedy, or a mary-sue. We can probably all agree that Bokuto isn’t either.

He isn’t prideful, he doesn’t overestimate himself. You all probably have gathered this from his ‘don’t toss to me anymore!’ drama. He does say ‘I’m the best!!’ and it’s funny, because he’s such a great guy when he’s confident, but do I really think he believes he’s the best? Far from it. Honestly, I don’t think Bokuto cares about being the best. He just cares about being the best version of himself, and that kind of mentality is far beyond his years.

Bokuto Koutarou is an honestly inspirational character. Although everyone in this series is very admirable, he’s a clear picture of what it’s like to power through yourself, power through all the things you can think that will drag you down (he doesn’t mope because his spikes were blocked, he practiced the fuck out of his spikes until they just couldn’t block him anymore). He’s incredibly kind and probably lacking all judgmental tendencies; asking a first year, a stranger from another school to practice with him on equal terms (in Asia, I think that’s a flippin’ miracle), and he has a silly, endearing sense of humour that has his entire team gravitating towards him. They all know what he’s like, what he’s capable of- all the good and bad- and what do they think? They obviously love the shit out of their captain, and it’s high time we were all told why.

Akaashi Keiji.

Here we’re brought to someone who’s often misunderstood and is tied tightly to Bokuto. First, I gotta address all the things people say about him being cold and calculating. I don’t want to diss anyone, but firstly, Bokuto isn’t stupid. He’s a combination of emotion and intelligence that brings him to where he is (volleyball strategy is hard, dude), and someone like that would not be friends with a cold and calculating person. Someone like that wouldn’t give Bokuto shit either, because that’s counterproductive to their goal. Does Akaashi give Bokuto shit? 99.9%, like detergent.

And why settle for Bokuto? Why not move on to someone bigger, someone better? If he’s that ambitious, I think the intelligent thing to do is to make friends with absolutely everyone. Feed them what they want, what fluffs their feathers, latch onto the best people possible. Akaashi, has very few friends, I think, outside of his own team. Every time he appears, it’s with Bokuto (this might be because of panel limits and screen time limits, but I don’t like to think so) and it’s clear that they’re nigh inseparable. Calculating and ambitious? If I were that intelligent and ambitious, I’d take the train to become Sakusa’s next bff. Akaashi literally never caters to Bokuto. He is never shown doing something he doesn’t want to do, and very rarely do you see him actually agreeing with someone, I’ve noticed. He just doesn’t object, or actually does object. 101 for sucking up to people- always agree, even if it’s bullshit. Bokuto has obviously been shot down so many times by Akaashi it hurts. I mean, aKAAAAAAAAAAAshiiiii, it’s a practiced plea. There’s even a compilation on YouTube.

What kind of guy do I think he is? Honestly, just a pretty socially disinterested high school dude who happens to like tossing balls at people. He makes friends, he talks to new people easily, just that he sounds like he doesn’t really want to. He doesn’t avoid people, but he’s not the social butterfly. He talks to Kuroo literally because he’s always around Bokuto, and he talks to Tsukishima ‘cus he’s there. He includes Hinata very quickly in their 3v3 too- there’s none of the ‘you’re short’ or ‘you’re an underclassman, I must address this’ glance. He just goes ‘oh, another person’. Sure, you can call that cold, but sometimes I’m like that too, not because I’m mean but because you’re literally just another human being I will get along with.

Akaashi is pretty much the definition of down to earth. He’s not so down that he’s underground and on the other side of the world, fitted with a VR system like Kenma, but he just gets on with his shit. He’s clearly not slow and steady from the split second decisions he makes on court and the way he sets, but he’s a no-nonsense kind of guy when it comes to himself. Clearly he doesn’t mind with other people, like Bokuto. It’s really cute, actually, because these two characters bring out the best in each other. They’re not a conventional pair, but they’re the opposites attract in every successful way possible. They make each other normal, they make each other human. Without Bokuto to put some silliness into his life, Akaashi would be too serious. Without Akaashi to drag him back down from the clouds, Bokuto would probably forget himself sometimes, and his school bag that he’s probably left in the classroom three days in a row.

If anything, I’d say that out of all the dynamics in the show, Akaashi and Bokuto would be one of the healthiest and happiest out of all of them. Friends or lovers, they don’t need to be shipped. This ship will sail on its own, even in reality.

Oikawa Tooru.

Lastly, the great king appears! The character to end all characters, Oikawa Tooru is, to me, the most fascinating character out of the entire cast. The most facets (even though I’d probably need some new meditating techniques to deal with him irl) and the most interesting backstory, this guy is literally made out of the dreams of fanfiction writers who bash their OCs lovingly with painful pasts.

There are very few people who misunderstand this guy, he’s so well loved because he’s so damaged. Still, I want to include him because he’s like a maze, and even though the end’s been found already, it’s always worth to give it another run through.

So. Quite the legendary character with existing angst about his abilities, he’s got one of the most relatable dilemmas out there: I’m not a genius, and I’m not talented. All I’m doing is trying my best (why, I don’t know), but you’re telling me I’m still gonna be overtaken by some kid prodigy? Fuck that. Okay, the fuck that I added, but that’s that. Yes, it makes a great premise for a complicated character, but the thing is, Oikawa might be less complicated than a lot of people think. Rather than the bad things, I think Oikawa is honestly quite pure at heart. I mean, think about how much dedication you would require for you to, in the face of this truth being a part of your team every day of middle school, relentlessly work yourself to the bone because you want to prove it wrong? Because, despite how unfair life is and how much shit everything sounds, he loves volleyball, it’s what he’s good at even if he can’t be the best, and he’s going to die before he stops working at it. This man is made out of a core of tempered steel, and a single-track mind. I think this character is literally the representation of ‘hard work trumps natural genius’ that gets passed around often. Whether it’s true or not is a different story- one that Oikawa clearly doesn’t believe in- but it’s not stopping him. Nothing is stopping him, because I think he knows that he can’t control anything in this world except for himself, and what he chooses to sacrifice.

Another important thing to note is his specialty. You’d think someone like Oikawa would want to work towards having the best serves, or the most complicated set-ups, or the highest success rate, right? Try to beat the prodigies with what matters? No. He comes up with his own methodology, the same one that makes Ushiwaka tell him he ought to have gone to Shiratorizawa, because he brings out the best in the people he plays with. Kind of strange for someone who seems so selfish, right? That brings us to the next point.

Yet, the thing is, it seems that the only thing he’s solidly believing in are his choices. There’s heaps of insecurity behind the playboy, the arrogant, the petty and mean guy that he literally crafts himself out to be. Is it just an image? Honestly, I think so, because it would be impossible to maintain such cognitive dissonance between his decisions and his behaviour. It’s a coping mechanism, a defense mechanism so practiced since a young age that Oikawa probably believes in it sometimes. Perhaps he has moments in bed alone, when he breaks down because he’s such a mess of opposing things and he becomes disillusioned with all the things he pretends to be because he really isn’t. Oikawa is very kind to the people he plays with, and for someone to ‘cater’ to a play style you have to be intuitively empathetic to predict their preferences. He doesn’t try to bring Kageyama down because it makes him feel better about himself- no, he just gives Kageyama shit ‘cus he thinks he’s allowed to be petty sometimes with the lemons life has given him, and honestly, it doesn’t make him feel a bit better. That’s why on the sidelines, he just bitterly admits that Kageyama’s a good fucking setter, because he really is. Oikawa doesn’t deny the truth. In fact, he just simply breaks through it, because it’s the only thing he can do.

[athousandsouls-blog1]

⚜ atsco: part three

“Someone died here.”

Summary: Bonnie’s first night in New Orleans does not go as planned.

When the bus pulls away there is a sense of finality.  She is in New Orleans.  Stuck (well, until a return trip can be booked).

She can’t very well stand there all night (though there is part of her that thinks it is not such a bad idea).  The strap of her bag is pulled to rest on her shoulder and she begins to walk.  She does not check to see if Kol is behind her. In her head she sees the map she has carefully studied.  Turn right at the end of this block.  

“Where are you going?” He asks.  He is not behind her.  Rather he beside her, slowing his gait so that they walk in unison.  

“Creole Inn,” she answers.  “Approximately twenty minutes from here.”  She glances at him expectantly, as if to indicate he should use the time to explain why she is here in the first place.  Thus far, she has avoided asking him straight out why it is he wants to see his family.  But now that she is actually here, she thinks she deserves a heads up (in fact she will get a heads up before she goes anywhere near Klaus Mikaelson).  

Instead of taking the hint, Kol makes a face.  “Why would you want to do that?”

“What?  Check into a roof over my head?  Walk?”  She retorts.  “In case you haven’t noticed, I am not exactly rolling in money.  This is the cheapest place I could find and I am not splurging on a cab.  This is not a vacation, Kol.  This is me going whatever it takes to get you to leave me alone.”  She stops on the sidewalk which forces him to mimic her movement and narrows her eyes.  “Start talking.”

He cocks a brow.  “Here?  Where anyone can bear witness to you speaking to thin air?”

“I don’t know anyone here.”  Only that is not true.  She knows the Mikaelson’s — she just wants to be fully prepped for when they came face to face once again.  “I don’t care what people think of me.  I just want to get this over and done with.”

“So eager,” he chides.  “In the midst of a historic city and already looking to leave.”  He begins to walk again, his hands stuffed in his pockets.  She watches him for a moment, wondering just what it is that he is doing.  He has backed her into a corner in the name of getting her here.  Wouldn’t he want to get straight to business?   Right now, he looks calm, cool, without a care in the world.  She might hate him just a little bit more because of it.  

“Kol,” she says and that hatred is evident in her voice.

He glances down, nonplussed and gives a jerk of his hand.  “I believe you want to take a right here.  If my memory serves me correctly.”

X

Because she has slept on the bus, she is not tired despite the late hour.  

Bonnie lies back on the bed (too soft for her tastes) and stares at the ceiling.  The inn was just as advertised – a roof over her head in the heart of the Quarter.  There is nothing extravagant or ornate.  Instead she has four walls, a place to lie down and a shower.  Her jacket is tossed and her bag is shown the corner.  She will not unpack.  Unpacking means she is settling for a while.

He is at the window, glancing down at the street below.  He hasn’t said much since arriving, merely quipped about the ‘hideous’ wallpaper before taking his perch.  She has a feeling if this keeps up it will be a long night.

Her fingers drum a beat on the comforter as the silence stretches into uncomfortable territory.  She is tempted to speak but there is no point.  Unless Kol is going to confess everything, she is just wasting her breath.

He on the other hand has no problem wasting his (non-existent as it is).

“This city has so much history.  Even before we came, though we have certainly left our mark on it.” There is a wistful quality in his voice that stills her fingers.  She sits up, her gaze falling on him.  He is still at his post in the window.  He turns his head so that they lock eyes.  “Political intrigue, battles, storms that nearly swept the city under — yet it has always endured.  I think it is fitting that we chose to come here.  Though, admittedly, I had no say in the matter.”

She thinks it over a moment.  “You were daggered.”

“On account of my bad behavior,” he commented wryly.  “I missed the first few decades in this city.  Of course when I had served my time I was able to enjoy the fruits of my brother’s labor.  A prince of New Orleans.”

He needn’t go on.  She can picture just how he would enjoy his ‘title’.  Bodies pile up in her mind.  The look on her face must be one of disgust because he is grinning.  She sits up a little straighter on the bed.  “And just how long before you were returned to your coffin?”

His smile falters.

She counts it as a victory.  Admittedly, she will never understand the dynamics of the Original Family.  She lacks their age and experience.  However — daggering, shoving one another in a box for decades; there is absolutely no logic to that.  Not that she is going to point that out to him though.  He already looks like he is smarting a bit and no doubt she will pay in some manner for her pithy remark.  Despite her earlier comment that this is not a vacation, she’d rather not sit around and wait for him to decide how.  

Bonnie stands, stretching out limbs still cramped from the bus ride.  She reaches for her jacket, which has landed on the dresser.  He doesn’t speak until she is buttoning it up.  “Where to, little witch?”

She turns, her fingers fumbling with the top button.  “Like you said, there’s too much history to be seen.  And considering I am not about to fall asleep — carpe diem.”

X

She could just follow the crowd as it were.  Apparently nighttime is as good as any to explore New Orleans.  Bonnie is tempted, for a moment, to slip into the line that is slowly shuffling into one of the many bars.  Even from her vantage point, she can hear the alcohol infused laughter.  Considering how her life has so easily unwoven in the past few weeks, she could use a bit of that.  

“Do remember that I will not hold your hair when you are sick in the morning, darling.”  His voice is low, spoken directly in her ear.  She shivers and then sends a glare over her shoulder.  He is grinning again.

Apparently Kol can shuck off a barb easily.  Or at least appear to have done so.  She steps around the line with a sigh.  “Throwing up in front of you is taking our relationship a step too far, don’t you think?”

“I sincerely forget that you have some bite to you until it is almost too late,” he states and she thinks he sounds a bit proud of her.  She can do without that — she can do without Kol Mikaelson beaming with pride in her corner.  “Do you speak that way to my brother?”

She doesn’t hesitate.  “Yes.”

“And you still live.  I would venture to say that you and he have some sort of unspoken understanding.”

Bonnie scoffs.  “One that involved my ability to scramble his brain in such a manner that he didn’t have the luxury of killing me.”  She presses her lips together and then turns toward him.  “The night…the night you died I trapped him the Gilbert house.  With your body.  That was the last time I ever stood face to face with Klaus.  He is not going to be welcoming when he sees me again and I can’t hold him back.”  It’s a scary thought.  She has seen Klaus possessed with anger and fury, has seen the aftermath.

“Ah, but you forget.  You are the anchor.  Immortal.  He can’t kill you,” Kol points out, seemingly nonplussed that she has just admitted to pinning his brother in with his remains.

“No, but he can hurt me.”

X

Without any sort of spoken arrangement to the fact, Kol becomes her tour guide.  There had been a few tense moments after her correction of his statement but then he had broken into a cheery grin she is coming to know quite well and announced they were so close to Jackson Square that they may as well venture on over.

It’s nearly deserted at this time of night.  There are few people, wandering in packs (no doubt under the influence) but she is the only one that appears to be alone. She realizes that this sets her apart should anyone think of ‘relieving’ her of her belongs (they will be disappointed as it were).  Still, her lingering nerves can’t take away from the beauty of this place altogether.  In fact, she finds herself sinking down on a bench and just watching.  

“If we had come earlier in the day, you would have found this place much more alive.  Music of all sorts, tarot readers — most full of it but a few with the actual gift, people looking to sell you homemade charms and potions…” He trails off.  Bonnie gets the feeling that no matter how short his time in New Orleans, Kol has formed an attachment to this city.  

“It sounds like a tourist trap,” she tells him and decides she likes Jackson Square better like this.  

“Be that as it may, there are hidden gems among the peddlers. I once found a powerful witch not far from here.  She did not even know what she possessed.  It was something to see…how she came into her own, how others to grovelled…”

Bonnie closes her eyes, her head dipping. That is not what magic is to her.  Reveling in it, using it to force others to cower.  Though it would be hypocritical for her to point it out.  Her use of expression (and how she had enjoyed it) keeps her silent as he prattles on about his little protégé.  Finally she looks to him.  “You like them. Witches.”

He grins as if she has unlocked one of his secrets (though if she thinks on it, it is poorly kept).  “I have always maintained a healthy respect for those who practice magic.”

“Your hands around my neck could speak to the opposite,” Bonnie tells him and her chin is tilted up now, as if she has gotten the better of him.

Kol shrugs.  “Collateral damage I am afraid.  We were at war, on opposing sides and at the time you were the key to everything.  Removing you from the situation seemed the best option.”

Bonnie’s lips quirk at the memory of him on his knees in front of her, his face twisted in pain.  “Seems like you chose wrong.”

Kol’s brows push together and then he too smiles.  “That I did.”

It takes her a moment to realize that this isn’t right.  Him waltzing them around memory lane instead of getting straight to the point.  Her relaxing as she takes in the sights. The two of them sitting side by side on a bench, laughing as if they are old friends (that one seems worst of all, especially since the memory they are caught up in started with his desire to kill her).

Has she really forgotten, even for a second, just why she is here?  

She stands abruptly and he looks caught off guard.  She doesn’t owe him any explanation (in fact it is the other way around) so she starts walking in the general direction that they have come.  He waits and beat or two and then falls in line with her step.  Though she doesn’t owe him, the silence gets to her.  “Look, I am not here so you have someone to relive your glory days with,” she begins.  “I have a life. Things…people I am rather attached to.  I’d like to get back to that.”

His features darken and whatever camaraderie (as twisted as it may seem) they had experienced moments before is gone.  “Think about what you said — you have a life.  I don’t.  Your friends decided that my death was worth that stupid cure that got them no further ahead in the end.”

“Collateral damage.”  

She regrets the words the moment fall off her lips.  It is said with none of the humor that was found in Kol’s explanation.  Instead it appears very much as she meant it to: a chance to throw his words back in his face.

It comes as no surprise to her that his hand snakes out so that his fingers can wrap tightly around her arm.  Not really here, she tells herself immediately as if she needs a reminder of the reality of the situation (perhaps she does because she can feel his thumb digging into her skin).  He appears just short of seething, eyes glittering as he dips his head in. “You’ve been here, Bonnie. Where I am now.  Alone and in the dark, wandering.  Tell me, would you wish that on anyone?”

A year ago she might have said she would.  A year ago she might have thought it a perfect ending for monsters like Kol and his family.  But she has experienced the reality of the Other Side.  Near the end, her mind had practically caved in on itself.  If it wasn’t for Jeremy, if it wasn’t for having someone to cling to she would have gone mad.  “No.”  Her voice is shaky, her eyes wide with memories she’d rather forget.  He seems satisfied with her answer and his hand falls away.

“This is not a leisure trip, little witch,” he tells her.  “You have real purpose for being here.  However, if I want to take a moment to remember what it is like to be alive and walk these streets, surely you will not begrudge me that.”

Bonnie doesn’t respond. Instead she takes a deep breath and begins to walk again.  Though she is still headed for her room, her steps are slower now.  She thinks if she lets him get the nostalgia out of his system then maybe, just maybe, he will finally divulge whatever it is that has caused him to drag her here in the first place.

He follows, giving her some much needed space.  For a moment or two she forgets he is even there.  

That is, until he launches into a story of his dalliance with a lady of the night.

Turns out she was a werewolf.

Of course.

X

She skitters to a stop as she turns a corner.  

It takes her a moment to realize why.  Bonnie’s hand is on her chest and she takes a shaky breath.  Death.  There is death here — or there was.  She sees no one in the empty side street but she can feel it.  The remnants hangs heavy in the air, like a fog threatening to choke her.  Behind her Kol is speaking of what a hairy situation he found himself in but she is no longer paying attention.  Instead she wanders into the thick of it, each step cautious.  Finally she can’t force herself to go any further so she stills.

“Bonnie?”

Her head turns to find Kol standing at the end, regarding her as if she has lost her mind.  She thinks he is a few years too late to be looking at her like that.  “Someone died here.”

“In this city, someone died everywhere,” he tells her.

“It’s more than that,” Bonnie retorts and she swivels as if the reason is going to make itself apparent.

It does.  

Her features knit together as she sees it.  Etched onto the side of a red brick wall in white chalk.  A circle with a symbol dead center — hastily drawn but one she knows.  She moves toward it just as Kol finally decides to follow.  He is muttering something about detours. She is too busy reaching forward to trace her finger over the edge of the circle.  She hisses, pulling back as if she has been burned.  He stops beside her and eyes the creation with an untrained eye and a scowl on his face. “What the bloody hell is this?”

“Magic — and not the good kind,” she answers and she suddenly wishes she had opted to stare at the ceiling of her hotel room instead.  Her hand drops and she turns toward him. “I would have thought someone who knows witches as well as you —-”  

He is not there.

Bonnie spins her head in the opposite direction expecting him to be standing there.  Instead she finds nothing but emptiness.  There is a split second glance at the symbol as if it is somehow to blame.  Then she hears footsteps.  

“Very funny,” she spits.

Only she is not talking to Kol.  Her eyes widen as she takes in the man standing there.  He, too, has a look of surprise on his face.  They eye one another for a moment too long.

Then she finally finds her voice.

“Elijah…”