#he also unfortunately only has one braincell

[a-holiday-ever]

It occurs to me that Krampus Puzzles ref is still on my main and I didn't move it over here. Time to fix that

Character Reference:

Mr.Galaxy/ Mr.Stageplay/ Krampus

BACK COIL IDEA FOR HIS TAIL CAME FROM

@change-name-later and their cool headcannon for how Mr.Puzzles tail would look!!! Thanks for the inspiration!!!

And his minion: Krampus.TM

Literally a walking Teddy Bear

He only sends people who he sees as irredeemable to hell..... (False: he is also super fucking Petty and will send people he doesn't like to hell)

His TV shows and Movies SUUUUUCK

Goes by many names, but ironically does not have a name he could use in a Social Interaction amongst adults. Hes never had to have one for that

He gives people multiple chances to redeem themselves before torturing them to death unless you're a pedophile/dictator/psychopath/genuinely horrible person

He typically never sends Children to hell, and opts to adopt them and raise them as his own until they eventually forget him and move out

He DOES NOT have Cannon!Mr.Puzzles powers

Being a Negative Deity, all these good deeds do absolutely nothing for the man's powers. They just make him happy

That being said, even though he is not as strong as he COULD be ...... He is still one of the most dangerous deities to live

Didnt always have a TV head and doesn't talk about it

Hates the colour Blue (on his own body and on christmas items)

The biggest dork loser you will ever lay eyes on, he is just a little guy

He does have a short temper... But its STILL unlikely that anyone would meet the short end of that stick

If hes being attacked he won't defend himself unless he sees the attacker as irredeemable

#1 Hal Monitor Hater after he finds out what that man is doing (he doesn't start off Knowing in the story. That comic was a peak into the future)

Doesn't like being scary or dangerous so covers his body up.

He is The Poly KING!!! He will date just about anybody regardless of gender or species! He would be one happy man to have 50+ husbands, wives and they/them partners (obviously excludes children)

Unfortunately while he Flirts a BIG GAME.... He won't take a relationship seriously until his partner makes it REALLY OBVIOUS that they are interested. He flirts but he doesn't realize when someone is actually interested in him. You could hand him a wedding ring after years of seeing him and he will not understand what is going on until you make it clearer to him. Then he will break down sobbing and say yes ❤️

Krampus.TM has 2 braincells

Listen to its father

Get hugs from its father

Will not listen to anybody that isnt Krampus but unfortunately does not have the brain power to identify Krampus differently from a stranger opening their arms to the lil guy

Can do Mitosis

[pixelateddork]

Drew a lil comparison of Lupin and Jigen compared to Jupin!

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 7 part 1

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

ah yes, episode 7, a notoriously low stakes one that people are not emotionally invested in whatsoever. a mere 9.1 on IMDB, nothing to write home about.

we start with lilia dying, because life and death are a never ending cycle. and also because the people who made this show are evil

she's like a teardrop. good fucking shot.

meanwhile billy is marching on, puffing his chest, all stone faced. agatha is pretending to be a nice little guy, to make friends.

she's really TRYING, okay?

rio's busy reaping alice's soul, but we don't reveal that until later. and LMAO agatha being all like, I'm gonna be OPEN and HONEST and a good ment- except for that I donwannatalkabouthat

agatha after she babysits a little boy once, scares him shitless and tries to kill his mom: we CLEARLY had a connection there

that poor little dash in the subtitles. fighting for its life to convey the chasm of time she leaves between ex and best friend

LET'S HEAR IT FOR REBECCA WHO RAISED THIS BOY FOR FAR LONGER THAN WANDA OR AGATHA EVER DID

but the unfortunate fact is, wanda still is his mother. or rather, she's the witch who thoughtlessly created him and left a big scar in her wake. he has to deal with all that.

marvel's powers that be: wanda maximoff is definitely dead-dead

jac schaeffer and co. every chance they get: she sure is!!! *big fat kathryn hahn wink at the camera*

if they ever do a 'marvel most iconic line' poll we as a fandom are voting for this one. just to be clear.

I saw some reactors going ooooh it's ho***rts. HOW DARE YOU SIR. that's the wicked witch castle. billy maximoff would never.

I've been asking myself WHY agatha simply doesn't tell billy about the nature of the Road, not even now that everything else is out in the open. the only answer I can come up with is that the Road is real and it's here and deadly, it's not in any way an illusion. and since the Road is linked to billy's emotional state, we dont' want him to go ballistic one he realizes he's been killing witches. agatha has decided she can only soldier through at this point and get herself and billy's home, they can talk about the implications later. yes, she's really scared of what billy can do.

I've also been trying to figure out the moon phases:

Full moon - water phase, blue, Jen.

Waning moon - fire phase, red, Alice.

Blood moon or lunar eclipse (still a full moon): spirit phase, purple, Agatha

Waxing moon: air phase, yellow, Lilia

New moon: earth phase, green, Rio

so we get full moon, waning, full moon again, waxing, new moon. they're completely out of order??

this whole trial is the equivalent of billy calling lilia a slur. no fr it's billy repeatedly beating lilia over the head with a stick and going, reCLAIM IT RECLAIM THE DAMN SLUR YOU WITCH

i find kathryn hahn as the wicked witch of the west alarmingly hot and i don't know what that says about me

billy is like, i effin KNEW I'd look this good. oh god, the Road was just an excuse to cosplay as maleficent all along

i love how these two find themselves alone for five minutes and immediately proceed to BUTCHER a trial. i'm overusing tumblr lingo these days and all, but I still gotta say it: there is one single braincell in this whole coven and lilia has it. it's like leaving two children in charge

a cursory google search tells me the two sphinxes represent light and darkness, you need to learn how to control both for the chariot to move forward

she always is!! sort of. kind of. mostly.

agatha, who's about as spiritual as a q-tip: how hard caN THIS BE

I can totally see her as a con artist counting cards in vegas

somehow I cannot picture evanora homeschooling her. or sending her to school at all, for that matter. you know this bitch is self-taught.

someone with more time than me should totally check if there's any rhyme or reason to the cards these two buffoons drew

I'm gonna end this entry with lilia's eyes again so it's another nice circle. a fun little ouroboros!

damn patti has such big doe eyes

go to episode 7 part 2

[thechekhov]

Dungeon Meshi Quick Reacts: CH38

Rip to these promising mages. I assume they will not survive this massacre.

IS that where her lungs and kidneys are? Because like. She's huge. Her entire body is behind her. Do you really think she'd keep her vital organs in the little human bulb on the front?

I mean, he has a point. What are you going to do? Fight off more hoardes of dragons?

oh noooo, Kabru.... too bad. That's so unfortunate.... anyway.

It's curious that Laios only got knocked away. He was just as likely to have had his head squished like a grape.

Guys, this is absolutely not the time to be concerned for her privacy.

Yes, queen. Free the tiddy. Murder everyone in this dungeon. I support women's rights and women's wrongs.

.......that's. One way to do that. I guess.

.......what's that rock about.

Oh, I see. That's convenient.

This guy dungeons! Maybe he even dragons.

So we got north (tallmen? dwarves?) and then the easterners.... and now the elves of the west?

He's going to give her to the Americans?! ಠ_ಠ

To be fair, at least they HAD a plan. And they executed it. It's more than you did. I don't mean to point fingers but... at least they... ya know... did something.

Kabru's like 'no, no, hang on, I need to hear what batshit fucked up thing this dude is going to say next, this is important'

Laios is so stressed he broke character.

Then again, maybe it's healthy to let them slug it out a bit. Get it out of their system.

It's true. They wore fitbits and everything.

...hey, hold on a second.

Now hold on a minute.

Damn, this is. Kind of even worse because. I guess I could have guessed that Toshi was just pretending to be polite, like you do. Cultural differences.

But the painful thing is, Laios doesn't seem surprised. He just seems resigned. He's been told before that he's difficult to get along with. To the extent that he doesn't even consider Marcille and Chillchuck his friends? Even though they arguably both care about him? But because Toshiro didn't bother to be deadpan about him being a bit odd at times, Laios thought it meant that was fine.

And that kinda hurts. Like damn. Laios just wanted to make a true connection. And I can't really blame Toshiro either, he was just trying to keep the peace but. Damn.

Free her! Let her do her illegal magics! She deserves it! （︶^︶）

Thoughts:

Senshi just being annoyed about that one last harpy looking for scraps.... like "shoo, this ain't the time"

That gnome seems genuinely nice. I'm sorry Falin squished his pet undyne.

Kabru hugging his..... mage? Girlfriend???? Seems very...one sided. Kinda feel bad for her.

Laios and Toshiro still going at it, I see. Get it allout, boys.

Uhhhhhhhhhh ninja girls.

Aww, doggo.

Last question: Where did the cat go?

Senshi: I can fix that.

Are you all worried because he's finally making sense?!?!

Laios and he punched their singular braincells into several new ones, it seems.

F./....Falin... please give the caterpillar some privacy........

My man, maybe lead with that............

I can't believe Marcille was potentially more forward about her feelings.......

"his pupils are dilated" yes, thank you sherlock. You've finally realized what everyone else who meets Laios feels almost immediately. he's a monster freak club card carrying member. Welcome.

p.....pubby......

As long as he was also inside the dungeon with them.... yes.

The issue with Kabru isn't that he isn't trying his best. It's that Laios isn't trying at all.

On a scale of one to Kabru, how badly do you react to being offered a food you don't want to eat?

......oh no. He's so pathetic it's funny. He's growing on me.

Absolute morons, the pair of them. Immovable object meets unstoppable force. The funniest combination ever. Ghost type and normal type pokemon, forever throwing moves at each other that will never hit. Laios thinking he's made a friend. Kabru just barely stopping himself from killing Laios. Best comedy pair. Tom and Jerry in a can.

Anyway. What a great manga.

[tadc-harlequin-au]

Celebratory 1k+ post! (+Official Reveal of "Him.")

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First of all, before I start, I would just like to thanks everyone from the bottom of my heart. I cannot begin to emphasize just how much it means to me that more than 1,000 of you decided that this blog was follow worthy.

The fact that so many people engage with this blog, whether asking a lore-related question to know more about the world of the AU, to joking around and making me laugh makes my heart swell with pride and joy.

This AU's purpose was not only to tell a story, but to also destress myself from my problems so I can keep my head on my shoulders and keep on living. So to know that many people found this passion project interesting enough, well... All I could really say is...

Thank you.

Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to share an incredibly canon-divergent story that is so far removed from the original source, it may as well be considered as a standalone project.

Thank you for sparing a little bit of your time and attention (as well as a few braincells) to learn about the characters, the story, the history, and the world of it.

... And most of all, thank you for continuously saving me from the darkness that attempts to consume me everyday.

No one really knows what happens to me behind the screen, and I'd rather keep it that way because I don't wanna be such a downer. Even here, I want to keep things lighthearted so I won't be delving into that.

Besides that, there's unfortunately something I haven't been entirely honest with you guys. Everyone knows about the B.O.S.S. (B.loodthirsty, O.verburdened S.corned S.ouls) roster, and how they serve as the AU's antagonists, but there is a secret character who doesn't exactly fall into that category.

Rather, he's not just a normal boss antagonist. HE'S THE OVERARCHING VILLAIN OF THIS AU, and has been teased since WAYYYY back to the early poster of the Harlequin AU.

You may know this guy as "???" from the roster list, or "HIM" from the answered lore-related asks. Well, for the sake of a celebratory 1k post that won't provide much strain for me, I've decided to reveal who this is.

Now, without further ado, I'd like you all to meet-

══════☸☸☸════════════☸☸☸══════

"The Patriarch of Puppets" - Official design reveal!

"Adorned in silver and reds, The Patriarch of Puppets (or simply, "The Patriarch") is an untouchable and powerful entity who constantly chases Pomni after she finishes a battle with a Boss."

No one knows what the fuck his problem is, But one thing is for sure: he first shows up after Pomni defeats the Skirmish General, and seems to like tormenting the Combat Harlequin by attempting to separate her soul from her heart and inflicting burning agony.

Pomni, in tandem, feels GREAT DREAD even at her first encounter with The Patriarch; she doesn't know why, but whenever he's in her general presence, her entire soul, AND her fight-or-flight instincts screams TWO THINGS: "DANGEROUS. RUN."

Pomni CANNOT fight him to save her life. Her sword hands starts to tremble and she can't move if she's around him for too long. She knows from the very beginning that this is a fight that she cannot win no matter what. He is the Hunter, and she is the Prize.

Bubble also seems to power off instantly and just crash to the ground with no warning, an immediate telling sign that he's already in the general vicinity. He seems to not care about the blimp in the slightest.

His classification is a King Harlequin; 1) a reference to "king-size", 2) a literal one of a kind Puppet, and 3) the tallest of Harlequins that no one even knew existed in the first place.

Just how tall exactly? Well...... here's the updated lineup.

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I hope that this is a fitting celebratory 1k treat for all you hungry lore eaters and Harlequin AU enjoyers!

[cherishedhope]

Hey there!! Hope you're doing great ! (⁠ ⁠˘⁠ ⁠³⁠˘⁠)⁠♥

Could I please ask platonic headcanons for the tweels with a reader that is the perfect little sister role for them like: She has a diabolic little smile like them, she's mischevious, a bit sadistic (not in a weird way tho!!) but she looks nothing like them !! Like, she's short, 'cute'-looking, wears aaaall pink and kinda behaves like a princess ! 'what is this cutie doing with the eel boys? she's worse than them?? jesus.' ,,

And sorry if this is too specific, but if I would describe reader's personality i'd say the one who would go '🎀 I'll kidnap your family AND your dogs and cats ! 🎀💞' with all sparkles and hearts and bows

Anyways, I thank you in advance! I hope that wasn't too long or specific, sorry about that . . .

Hope you have a nide day/night ! (⁠〃ﾟ⁠3ﾟ⁠〃⁠)

A/N: Awee!! This is soooo cute! Also dw, I loved the fact that it was long and specific. It really helped me out while writing this! :3 May you have a lovely day/night as well and ty so much for the request~! I hope you enjoy! d(･∀･○) Genre: Fluff, platonic. Disclaimer: Characters are likely to be ooc. Not proofread. If there’s anything you don’t like, lmk and I’ll fix it right up! :D Characters involved: Floyd Leech and Jade Leech. Request status: Open!

— The students at NRC should’ve counted their lucky stars while they had the chance. They were blessed to only have the tweels to deal with, but given that there was a new addition to the school? Specifically the tweel’s younger, slightly more unhinged but proper sister? Hoo boy.

— You and Floyd are inseparable. Hell, it’s more like you guys are besties rather than siblings. The two of you are well-known for assisting Azul in his journey on balding at the ripe age of seventeen, being declared the most chaotic and destructive duo on campus, bullying Riddle into throwing a hissy fit, but mostly for how terrifying of a presence you give off. Crowley would tell you two off but he is not taking any chances. mainly because he’s useless but you didn’t hear it from me 🫣

— Floyd constantly teases you about your height and more often than not wonders if you’re adopted. Not to mention how bossy you can be sometimes…. sheesh! Even Jade isn’t that prim and proper. You don’t even look like him! (lowkey side-eyeing his mom rn… ) Then he reminds himself that no, you couldn’t possibly not be blood. You’re literally a tiny version of him! Just with completely different features and shorter legs!! And more spoiled!! I mean, c’mon, there is no mistaking the bone-crushing, chaotic squeezes for someone who isn’t a Leech. It runs in the family.

— Okay, but imagine paying a “visit” to one of Azul’s clients who broke the contract. You threatened to kidnap the poor college student’s family, dogs, and cats and then Floyd pipes up, “AND WE’LL EAT THEM TOO‼️‼️👹👹”

— Finds it hilarious when students do a double-take once you reveal your true colors. Hahaha! They really let the cutesy act fool them? What a bunch of losers! In his humble opinion, they deserved to get squeezed for assuming his younger sister wasn’t as cool as him :)

— Remember how I said you guys were besties? It was a half-truth. With how often he teases you, I could see a fight breaking out. He’ll go easy on you though! He doesn’t want to break any of your fwagile tiny bones 🥺🥺 (kick his ass. 😒 )

— I’d say Floyd is pretty protective. I mean, he follows you around everywhere. That should be enough to repel any idiots from messing with you, but unfortunately some people only possess a crumb of a braincell. If anyone tries to harass you, he’s beating them up on the spot. You wanna join in? All right, he’ll hold the dumbass down for you! Get him where it hurts!!!!

— Overall a decent older brother. I wouldn’t kill him on the spot 👍

— The fact that you are the complete opposite of his brother and him in terms of physical looks and somewhat personality has always been incredibly amusing to Jade. Unlike Floyd, he never questioned if you two truly shared blood. There is not a single person in the entirety of Twisted Wonderland who could replicate that signature devious Leech grin. — Given you two are significantly more mature than Floyd, it is rare that you get into heated arguments. That doesn’t mean it hasn’t happened! Jade just knows when to walk away. Now whether he apologizes or not depends on the situation. Sometimes he will, other times he’ll just give you the silent treatment. — Much like Floyd, he teases you for your short stature, albeit more subtly than his twin. If he’s feeling particularly cheeky that day, he’ll store some of your favorite accessories on a high shelf that is just out of reach for the sole reason of getting on your nerves. There was also this one time he bought you a ladder for your birthday. That was it. Just a ladder. No follow up gifts after that. A three step ladder. In hindsight, it is a good gift for if you needed to reach something that is too high! Or at least that’s the excuse he gives. 😒

— He is relieved that you aren’t as reckless as Floyd whilst still maintaining that Leech family charm. The messes you create are less of a hassle to clean up compared to his obnoxious counterpart. With that being said, Jade will reward you with head pats as a job well done for completing any tasks you may receive! :D The tasks? “Tending” to rowdy customers, helping him out at the Monstro Lounge, intimidating Azul’s clients, etc. You do a splendid job.

— Chuckles when he watches you threaten an unfortunate soul with the capture of both their family and pets all while beaming at them in your bubblegum pink attire. Not only was it highly entertaining, but Jade barely had to lift a finger as you took care of the scum! He has never been more proud in his life.

— Even though you are more than able to protect yourself, Jade keeps a close eye on you. Despite being an elite school, it was still filled to the brim with shady characters. That coupled with the fact that his pure, can-do-no-wrong little sister is attending the same school as them, he’s going to make sure no creeps are lurking around. And if by some chance you do get harassed, the offender is never seen again. — No, he doesn’t play favorites. Certainly not! Why, how could Floyd ever accuse him of such a thing? 😔 you are totally his favorite sibling.

©2024 cherishedhope. do not repost on other platforms, modify, steal, copy, or use without explicit permission.

[trainnster]

A Message for our Dearest Friends ✨

[[ Before anything, I do give a TRIGGER WARNING for those who may not want to read about anymore of Nirmal's escapades, and also who may not want to look into discussions of z!on!sm, harrassment of children, and just general nasty ass behavior from Karen Supreme over here. If you do read though, I very much thank you! ]]

So y'know unfortunately I was not added to The List™. Really sad, might just piss and die from it all. HOWEVER, I care about this fandom and I'm always for being petty, so I guess I'll take the bait and send a nice little message to our dearest friend @gordontheengineswifenirmal and her little bestie boo @drackara for trying to fuck with MY friends!! 😁

FIRST OFF, I am not nor will I ever take shit from some bitch who named herself after that fugly ass grey cat from Garfield, so no I am not scared of you and actually I'm SO happy you chose a fandom I happen to be in to try and be a little prick to so I can go into some of the shit you've done!! Like omg thank you SO much for this opportunity, girl! 😊✨

SECOND, you are old enough to be the parent to about 60% of this fandom yet lack the simple maturity basics that even a 5 year old has, so like idk but maybe you should look into going back to school and doing something with your life, since it's obvious you're just rotting in your friend's basement and don't have any sort of diploma or certificate to your name teehee!! 😘

THIRD, going on with how grossly uneducated you are at your crusty dusty ass age, let me remind you that nobody, I mean NOBODY- Actually, here, lemme add the definition so you can get it:

NOBODY [pronoun] / ˈnoʊ.bɑː.di / : not anyone

(SOURCE: Cambridge Dictionary)

Yeah, so that? Yeah, nobody owes you shit over actual families who are going through one of the worst mass humanitarian disasters we've seen in modern history! There's this other thing called "independence", yeah, and THAT means that we ALLL get to choose where our money goes! Isn't that so great? Yeah so that means… People get to choose if they want to monetarily support you!!! 🥳 Isn't that just so lovely?

And y'know, maybe it's just me, but I dunno if people would want to use their independence over their money to send it to a random 42 year old over helping people escape literal genocide. Doesn't sound so great does it? Yeah, maybe it's kinda like people have hearts and understand that genocide is far worse than some random 42 year old who spews z!onist rhetoric, disrespects sex work, and demands monetary gain from literal kids who she not only calls slurs but also actively exposes to NSFW content on her little confessions blog!

Y'know… maybe THAAAT'S why people don't send you money! Yeahhh it's cuz you're a basement-dwelling prehistoric z!onist toad who actively threatens the safety of literal children in online spaces!! I got it figured out!! And y'know, I got you figured all out too, darlin', because I sure as hell know this ain't your first rodeo and this post sure as hell ain't mine!

And y'know I could just keep going on and on, but considering you're probably red in the face and sobbing like the infant-minded subhuman creature you are over lil ol me simply going over just one single little atrocity you've committed on this fandom, I think I'll spare you from holding you to the mirror for ALL that!

Anyways, I do hope this all finds you just SO well, and maybe you can understand just a teensy bit why people y'know… Don't like you! Yeah, so uh hope your holidays go great, hope the new year treats you better than how you've treated ANY of us, and I do hope that poor single braincell gets some friends in the incoming year because he sure is real lonely in that hollow head of your's! Anyways buh-bye hon, hope you have a fantastic day 🥰

[not-another-robin]

Wayne Manor is an All Autistic Household - AKA I'm projecting

Part 1: states of dress

I've said it before and I'll say it again: if Bruce is left to his own devices he'd never wear clothes. He hates fabric and fabric hates him. He wants to be released from the shackles of human civility but unfortunately he has 6 children he doesn't want to traumatize. He still can be found in just his underwear and robe (and one sock somehow) after a particularly difficult case. Also, he forgets to take the bat suit off often.

Also previously discussed, Alfred needs to wear clothes at all times. He hates being unclothed so much it's unreal. He is also very strict about what clothes are 'appropriate' for what time. The kids can count on one hand the times they've seen him in proper pajamas, if he's woken up in the middle of the night he's decked out in robe and cap and slippers and Night Ascot. Every Christmas they wake up earlier and earlier to get him to come down in his pajamas, it has never once worked.

Dick does wear clothes but he wears any clothing that crosses his path. Steph's workout leggings? Sure. Damians xs hoodie? If it fits over his head why not. He has to expend brainpower to come up with a comprehensible outfit and too often he has no braincells to expend. Also he forgets to wear shoes. He has gone all the way to work barefoot and had to turn around.

Pre-death Jason was definitely "running around in boxers until Alfred scolded him" kid, post-death he's wearing a hoodie AND sweatpants AND fuzzy socks at all times. He runs cold, go figure. He cannot walk around on non carpeted floor without slippers or socks, he hates being barefoot. He sleeps with socks on, the monster.

Tim the pinnacle of teenage boy, He'll wear a shirt if he's already in it but he won't go through the effort to put one on, if that makes any sense. He sleeps shirtless so he stays that way most weekends. He is the prime breaker of the 'please put on a shirt while people are over' rule. Unbelievably specific but: when his hair gets long enough it starts to bother him, he'll use his shirt as a bandana to get it out of his eyes. Yes it looks ridiculous. No he doesn't care.

Damian is the only one who endeavors to remain clothed as he doesn't like not wearing them, but he has problems with changing his clothes. He routinely goes to sleep fully in the outfit from the day. If left to his own devices he would just go a week in the same outfit without changing. They had to have an extensive 'you cannot sleep in a suit' talk. He doesn't change out of his school uniform when he gets home.

Duke is yet another shirtless teenager, but he takes advantage of the Many Robes of the Wayne household. He thinks it looks cool until Damian points out he looks like a stepmom. He still wears them though, they're so soft.

Cass likes to steal hoodies. No hoodie or sweater or robe for that matter is safe, they all end up in Cass's Horde. She also denies her crimes because she thinks it's funny. Other than that she loves soft pajamas, but usually ends up in shorts. She has walked around in a sports bra sparking a lively debate as to what counts as "shirtless"

[theunholybastard]

It's me again! How's your holiday weekend going if you celebrate? If you're up for it, can I get a fic detailing the social hierarchy of the ghouls? I'm curious to see what their social structure looks like. It doesn't matter to me if there is a plot or not. Nor does it matter if there's porn or not.

Hey, lovely! 👋 I'm doing great, besides holiday shopping kicking my wallets ass 😭 I hope everythings going great on your end! Wishing everyone a fun and safe holiday season <3

Tbh I've never given it much thought before, but obvs it would make sense that the Ghouls have a sort of pack structure and hierarchy. And now that you got me thinkin' about it I have a few ideas to share😈🙏

Era 4/5 Ghouls/Ghoulettes Social Structure Headcanons

(for the most part SFW, some brief mentions of the hanky panky)

First off,

Ghoul packs are separated by era. The era 4 and 5 Ghouls are all in one pack, and the era 3, 2, and 1 Ghouls are in entirely different packs of their own. Ghouls are naturally very territorial, so they rarely interact with members of the differing Ghoul packs. I say rarely because Sunshine and Mist actually happen to be girlfriends, and unfortunately for the others, they just have to hold back their instinct to hiss whenever Sunny comes home smelling like a different den, and vice versa.

Roles are an important factor in every Ghoul pack. After being in a pack for a while, Ghouls tend to pick up on each others mannerisms, and even start to think like each other. (AKA, they all share one braincell) This makes it easier to decide on rules and roles within the pack, since they can (for the most part) all collectively decide on it without even having to verbally discuss.

Aether is what you would call their (un)official leader. He's strong, gentle but firm, and despite being a mostly relaxed guy, he isn't afraid of putting his fellow Ghouls in their place if needed. It was easy for all of them to come to the conclusion that he is who they want to follow. He loves being in charge, and the rest love it too!

Well, all of them except Dew, who has made quite the habit of challenging Aether. It's nothing personal obviously, he's just a hard-headed little shit and craves the power and control Aether has. He's never had a very good relationship with authority. Luckily, Aether's able to set him straight real quick when they get back to the den. If you don't hear from Dew for a few days, he's probably stuck in a cage, and not always in a kinky way.

When Aether got replaced by Phantom, though he was still considered the leader back at the Ministry, they needed someone to take over while touring. Finally, Dew gets his chance to take charge! Right? WRONG! That's right, Aether's second in command is Rain! Yeah, Dew wasn't happy about that.

Rain wasn't comfortable with it at first, either. Normally leaning more reserved and soft-spoken, he felt he was in no shape to be in charge of any his fellow Ghouls. But once again, without it even having to be discussed, all other Ghouls seemed to look to him for leadership. And Rain has never been one to disappoint. He ended up adapting to his new role fairly easily, adopting a more confident and outward persona. And Dew, with his sickeningly sweet soft spot for Rain, challenges him a little bit less. Only a little bit though.

Cumulus, at the end of the day, is the glue that holds the pack together, serving as a sort of protector. Shes like the mom friend of the group, a matriarchal like figure who makes it her duty to take care of her pack however she can. She holds such a commanding yet comforting presence, making her perfect for her role. Being level-headed and intelligent, she's also the one they look to for guidance if neither Aether or Rain are available.

If any of them are in need of comfort, she's the one to go to. If any of them are having a fight/dispute, shes the one to sternly scold them and help them make peace. Oh, did Dew cut his finger open again? She's got bandaids ready. Oh, is Rain feeling a bit lightheaded? She's got a bag full of snacks with her at all times. Some creepy guy hitting on Cirrus? They'll never find his body. I have to stop myself from talking about Cumulus now or else this is gonna end up being too long I'm so obsessed with her omg

Ghouls are highly social, and if you were to ask which Ghouls are most commonly seen paired up together, I'd say they all are around each other pretty equally. They form bonds very quickly, especially with other Ghouls, and with their natural separation anxiety, they quite literally need constant companionship. They are hardly, if ever, seen alone, and you will usually see the whole pack together. But that doesn't mean they're always all together.

When Ghouls do split up from the pack, it usually is because one or more Ghouls has gone into heat/rut. And as fun as it is to fuck it out, they can't risk having potential kits to worry about. During this time, they will settle into groups of 2 or 3 to keep them socially satisfied until the whole pack is back to feeling better.

When this happens, Cumulus and Cirrus are inseparable, so they are always paired up, no exceptions. (They're girlfriends, your honor!) Sometimes Rain will pair up with them, since Rain shares a particularly close bond with the Ghoulettes, but more often than not he's with Dew or Mountain, not wishing to be a third wheel.

Aurora has no preference as to who she pairs up with, she quite literally is madly in love with everyone. But most commonly she's seen paired with Swiss, because even though he is ALSO madly in love with everyone, he may be madly in love with her a bit more. Plus, they're both SO insatiably horny, so it works out for the both of them.

Aether usually goes for Sunshine or Moutain to pair up with. They're just so much less chaotic than certain friends of his (*cough* Dew and Phantom *cough*) and Aether enjoys being around a Ghoul he doesn't have to constantly monitor and make sure they don't do anything stupid. Well, besides that one time Mountain tried to hug a bear, but Aether doesn't like to talk about that.

But much like Aurora, Sunshine has no preference as to who she's paired with, and usually just pairs with the first Ghoul who asks her, or join Cirrus+Cumulus. And Mountain likes pairing with Rain, so if Aether is too late to ask either of them, that means he's left to pair with Phantom.

Aether doesn't mind too much, it's not like he hates Phantom, in fact he loves him! But he can be... a bit much sometimes. He's grown used to it though, considering they pretty much grew up together in the Pit, Phantom is practically a younger brother to him. Besides, it's not nearly as rough as pairing with Dew. Though it does get a bit stressful when Phantom sleepwalks...

-

[tamelee]

i just saw a posts about novels that went like

sarada told sasuke he has lipstick stain, sasuke tries to wipes it off and she says he doesn't have one and sakura doesn't wear lipstick.

how do they defend this novels with their lives? it confirms sasuke never kisses sakura and doesn't know if she wears lipstick or not and kisses someone else who wears lipstick. it also confirms naruto likes to wear lipstick XD.

Please. These novels are ridiculous. Kishimoto already confirmed they’ve never kissed in Gaiden. Twice. 

(* something nicer = meant the forehead poke)

Though I wouldn't believe anyone if they said they actually like these novels, because the story (or lack thereof) is complete shit, but it’s fine if they do. A good story isn't the intention unfortunately. I genuinely wish that people understood what exactly it is they are defending. I’m writing a post for someone who asked something regarding canon, but I need to take brakes from it because it pisses me off that this happens constantly to franchises— not just Naruto. 

And in this case it’s even worse, or perhaps it’s just a prime example, because Jun Esaka (writer for some of these novels) made such a fool of herself on twt by making it all too obvious what her intentions were by writing them. (If it wasn’t already obvious.) First, when people pointed out the many flaws, she admitted that it’s “just her story” and “just her interpretation” (she had only read 'Naruto' for the first time a few months before that), but when other ss-shippers started to defend her and said she was a better writer than Kishimoto (as there’s 0 love between SS when he writes), she basked in that glory and went along with it. Even to the point that she completely disrespected Kishimoto, the story, the craft, openly made fun of other characters (mostly Hinata) and ships like NH and demanded her other novels to be animated as well. It’s unprofessional af. And then when fans asked her for a nsfw novel for SS she agreed and told them to harass the company about it. (She didn’t say ‘harass’ exactly, but come on you can’t be that dense given their reputation with staff.)

What are they defending? 

How can you defend anything when the motive is so obviously just personal bias/gain and/or financial profit to a company where both in this case don’t give a shit about the original story. It's not about shipping though, it happens all the damn time to all my favorite franchises and I'm genuinely sick of it. And it's not even about a writer writing about what they want either because I already expected that, but Esaka did her absolute best to try and disprove the bond between Naruto and Sasuke and change narratives completely even for individual cases for the sake of telling her "story". SNS-moments weren’t romantic to her and she quite literally made fun of it by copying them in her story to point out its "irrelevance", but give them to her het-ship and now all of a sudden it is romantic???? She basically calls Kishimoto a liar because ‘Sasuke Retsuden’ in particular is a direct response to ‘Gaiden’ (made by Kishimoto). She blatantly tried to disprove anything he said and indicated about her ship. She wrote about characters that, yes, have the same name as those in ‘Naruto’, but are so out of character it hurts. It took me months to recover my lost braincells. 

I don't think my post about it is still up, but to name a few things in that novel if you're interested: Sasuke resents Naruto and his test-tube daughter because he’d rather travel with Sakura, his wife whom he loves so much. But he has to do stuff just because Hokage Naruto said so and his daughter wants to stay in Konoha so he has no choice but to comply. Being apart from his wife-(did we mention he loves her so much? because he does. so much.)- makes him feel so very lonely and he misses her body so much because he knows it so well. He fails to do anything other than being jealous about the women-deprived prisoners going after the new hot doctor, Sakura, who is his wife btw. that he loves a lot in case you missed it. and he rather stares at trees that remind him of her than helping his friend Naruto who’s apparently dying from his own chakra or whatever kind of bs. Sasuke lets himself be bullied by prison-guards that aren’t even Shinobi, for having long hair and looking like a girl, though Esaka makes sure to mention how so very handsome he is and he looks like a cat. Sasuke loses a battle against an overgrown lizard and tries the same damn jutsu 4 times(!!!!) before realizing it may actually not work, I think because he forgot how to fight, but he can however create anything from ice like Elsa (Frozen), or from dirt like some Gaara-hybrid to make Sakura a ring because he loves her so much ofc… oh and he’s now a healer too. Sasuke sacrifices people’s lives even when it’s not necessary at all bc ig Esaka thinks he's a killer, and also he wouldn’t mind being brought back with Edo Tensei if it means he can stay with Sakura, because fuck everything they’ve been through in the original story, yeah? They also immediately forgive the bad guy cuz he's so relatable even though he just murdered I dunno how many people. SS kiss while an injured Naruto is squished in between them because SS-shippers have some sort of “Naruto has to watch our ship being in love to really make it legit because that’ll learn him for getting in between!”-kink (that's real actually) and according to Esaka, Sasuke is so worried about his daughter and in fact did meet up with them during those 10+ years because he loves them oh-so-much and fuck you Kishimoto that’s why. 

Be so fr right now. It’s such a joke. And these are just the few things on the top of my head that I remembered ;-; ...

Again, what are they defending exactly? It would be nice to just have a genuine fan of the story write an actual story. No other motive other than "I really like the story and would love to explore some options while respecting Kishimoto's work because it'd be fun!" Except, that's unfortunately not very marketable and ffs it's just sad. (I know there's a Kakashi version and I personally really want to know more about his role as Hokage and what he's done etc, but alas.)

[beevean]

Seeing as how the nocturne s2 trailer just dropped I figured I’d ask something I’m a bit curious about

If season 3+4 of the original show ended up following the plot of curse of darkness do you think it could have done that story justice or turned out much better than what we got? With the characterization of Hector and Isaac in season 2 of the show it would have diverged anyways, but it’s interesting to think about.

I just know a lot of critics of the show point out that there was already a story to tell after the events of cv3, but if they’d gone that route would it really have been what Curse fans wanted anyways?

I think this question should be asked to the fans who were following the development of the show in real time lol, because poor things clearly had hope until S4 😂 I remember reading posts of people who were absolutely certain that Hector's story would have ended with him going on a rampage, killing Carmilla and Lenore, running away and meeting Rosaly for his happy ending.

I don't think their characterizations back then would have been an issue. Yes, show Isaac is far calmer and more introspective, but his only personality in S2 is "Dracula simp who thinks Hector is shit under his shoe", which tracks although he's less fun about it. Yes, show Hector is more mellow and trusting, but he was still perfect material for a character arc revolving around him learning empathy for his fellow humans, and learning to think for himself and deciding what he truly wants to do in life, which is more or less his arc in the prequels.

See, the issue is that S2's finale already diverged from CoD's set up. Isaac being yeeted away while stewing in anger? Yes, that could have lead to his descent into madness: I suspect the writers reversed this arc when they realized how... unfortunate it'd look, with their new shiny Isaac. But were they less cowards, sure, I can see Isaac losing his self-important veneer and becoming increasingly unhinged. Maybe his red hair would grow to symbolize it!

But Hector ends S2 tricked, humiliated, beaten and dragged away as a prisoner. A sheer contrast to how, in canon, he ran away after claiming agency. Carmilla's very existence throws a wrench into CoD's story, because the prequels were all about Hector understanding that working for Dracula is wrong, while S2 was all about Carmilla being the only braincell in the castle and dragging Hector along like a dog to cause Dracula's downfall. Had Hector freed himself from her clutches in S3, we could have still had an interesting story maybe (I'm fond of the Hectorcard plot of him running back to the castle and bonding with Alucard over their grief lol), but I'm not sure how this Hector, a Hector who is wracked with guilt over contributing to Dracula's death, one that is so insecure and hasn't spoken with a human being in years (Isaac doesn't count), would fare with a woman who is meant to be a stand-in for Rosaly (because no way they'd write her as the Rosaly we know: we all know how much the show loves its sassy mean women). Plus, the story would be poorer because Carmilla would be just. lost. which is technically what happens in S3 already lmao Lenore snatches her place - you know what I mean

Therefore, the rewrite has to start even before S3. @chumpovodir once had a great idea about how she'd keep Hector and Isaac as the villains of the story and how the plotbeats of CoD could be shoehorned into the show. Another wonderful alternative comes from @notebookofthedead, that also tries to meet the show halfway through, and even includes a fusion of Rosaly and Julia as Hector's new ally and the spark for his character development lol.

[evil8keta]

Mercs with a reader (PLATONIC)

who’s personality is kinda like invader zim? Not exactly like him, but just has that loud, crazy, demeanor?

HELL YEA! I LOVE CRAZY PPL

mercs with a loud and energetic reader

SCOUT

- i'm gonna be honest, scout was probably scared of you at first lol. he thought you're actually insane, but i think over time he would kinda grow a liking for you? so congratulations, you're now his prank buddy. actually, you're pretty much his buddy for any and all stupid shit that scout wants to do

SOLDIER

- oh he LOVES you!! i mean you're kinda like a mini version of him, so from the moment he saw you he pretends he's your dad or something. you two often yell at eachother and soldier is very proud of you and loves your enthusiasm, he thinks you're a fighter. this man does a lot of stupid and dangerous shit with you and hypes you up 24/7. you two are a powerful duo

PYRO

- now, pyro can be a bit immature, but i don't think the're the type to be very loud and eccentric like you. because of this pyro was also probably a bit scared of you at first (having pyro scared of someone is quite an accomplishment might i add). but over time pyro will most likely get used to you. i mean it's not like you're an evil threat or something you're just loud and off the walls lol. you two do get up to a lot of silly shenanigans together

HEAVY

- ughhh...so loud. heavy doesn't like very loud people, but he will tolerate you. eventually he kinda grows a soft spot for you, idk why. maybe he just likes weird crazy people like that (looks at medic). anyway, heavy actually really enjoys having you around despite your high energy. unfortunately for you, he can be a killjoy. he will often talk you out of new fun things that you wanna try if he finds them too dangerous. or he straight up just man handles you and throws you over his shoulder to make sure you dont do anything stupid. anyway he loves you, you're like a little chihuahua to him

DEMOMAN

- oh you two are very similar so i think you'll get along very well. i'm talking buddies in crime, constantly getting up to weird and crazy plans that may or may not result in a few broken limbs or mental trauma (not for you two, but for those watching you). you both literally share one braincell. also he kinda views you as his younger sibling

ENGINEER

- for someone as laidback as engie, he surprisingly doesn't mind people with high energy. he actually thinks you're pretty silly and enjoys watching you do crazy shit cause it's kind of charming to him?? he's just happy to see you have fun. the only thing that he's a bit scared of is letting you in his workshop... like yeah, he trusts you! just.. maybe not THAT much..

MEDIC

- omg he loooves your high energy. you guys can be unhinged together all the time, he definitely hypes you up. however, sometimes he needs his calm moments so he can focus on his work. don't take it personally but he might lock you out his lab so you don't disturb him. but other than that you can bet he pulls you into a lot of crazy shit, even sharing all his strange medical plans and findings with you

SPY

- TOO LOUD TOO LOUD! sorry buddy spy will avoid you like the plague. he does think you're fun to watch but only from a distance. he's got enough maniacs on the team already y'know? it's not that he dislikes you but whenever you try to engage with him he acts irritated and just tries to escape you. get his ass

SNIPER

- same with spy, too loud. you know sniper, he's a quiet guy who keeps to himself and overall prefers silence. he does think you're cool and funny though and even joins in on your crazy shenanigans from time to time. as long as you don't yell his ear off he will definitely like you

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

hello! really new fan (by really new I mean just finished books 1 and 2 new) that decided to hop on here for some lore and I am so endlessly confused :sob:

however, what I am most curious about is all of the different aus involving the legacyverse. stuff like the silent one jesse and whatnot. just curious if you could give a biref rundown on all of the main aus that you have for them, if possible.

Hello!! Welcome to the madness~

For 100% strictly lore that adheres to the Main Story itself, the Elemental Compendium tag is your best bet! Unfortunately the 'Info Tag' has since become my tag for ALL (or most) asks as opposed to directly relevant information itself, but that's the second place I would direct you to regardless.

But! If it's all the different AU's you're after, I can totally help you there!

Cracked!Legacyverse: The very first one, which is essentially an AU with @k1ngtok's OC Jamie + things with Olivia/Harumi not being quite as extreme as they are in the main story. Has a BUNCH of sidestories by myself, King, and others I can direct you to if you're interested in a slightly fluffier take on some S2/S3 events!

Royal!Legacy AU: The 'main' au with actual story to go along with it is what it says on the tin: royalty au! There's a lot of bigger worldbuild-y aspects to it with all the supporting characters to parallel the main story, but otherwise it's just a big fancy love story between Jesse and Cole for people who (like me) want to see them with a relationship without waiting for my agonizing main story slowburn jljhgfdghf

Inverse!AU/LegacyInverse: A totally off-the-cuff Role Reversal!AU where Wu was the one bit/turned evil and eventually "kidnaps" the Core Four for his eventual revenge, Lloyd does not initially have the Green Element thus runs the risk of becoming the Golden Master sooner/easier via only having his Essence, and Garmadon becomes Sensei to the Inheritors of the Outlier Elements/ Elements of Destruction to try and stop save Lloyd—which also inadvertently means Harumi ends up as the legendary Magenta Ninja. Chaos ensues. I still have asks to answer on this hgfdgfd

Mer!AU: Started with me spitballing some vibes I had at the time, turned into a WIP (with art!) that I still have yet to finish, but I keep on chipping away at (I WILL finish it. One Day). It's another Aftershock story though (I have one braincell)

Shark!Nya AU: Started as one of many What If asks from long ago that branched into its own thing -> but it's an AU where Nya as the Samurai joins the Shark Army with Olivia during Book 2 instead of trying to be a third party, and the subsequent falling out that would result all the way into S3. Also doubles as an AU where Plasmashipping (Jay/Kai) ends up canon, but that's neither here or there

Quiet!Jesse: An AU where Jesse goes to help Harumi right away at the end of Book 2 instead of prioritizing Miranda, leading to the death of his sister instead and him being the one injured in the elevator + him being the one to blame Lloyd for it and concocting revenge. (He also dies at the end, rip)

Into the Ninjaverse: Kind of a 'for fun' AU where selves from the Show, the Movie, and Legacyverse (potentially with other variants as well) meet each other and interact with shenanigans. Also doubles as an AU where Stormlightshipping (Jay/Sunni) winds up canon

Volleyball!Harumi: Not actually an 'AU' as I do plan to do something with the concept, but literally everything is the same except Harumi actually joins a non-evil volleyball team lmao. This also kind of goes hand-in-hand with another concept of Harumi writing Ninja/Shark Army fanfiction lmao

DR!Jesse/Dragons Rising-related Stuff: Not actuallyyyyyyy an AU, but it's technically notttttt canon to the mainverse eitherrr, so. Basically this encompasses how certain aspects of Legacyverse would (THEORHETICALLY) work within DR, alongside a (THEORHETICAL) story following how Jesse would deal with all these newfound changes to his life, on top of raising his kid as a single parent. Be mindful if you dive into that tag tho; there do be some spoilers (but those are tagged as well)!!

Next-Gen Jamboree + Alter!Verse: Essentially an AU of the prior AU when everyone's got (at least one) kid prior to The Merge, and the angst that comes with that falling out...except for Lloyd, who only gets a kid thanks to alternate universe shenanigans that rain upon him during his five years alone Post-Merge. It's different from simply "DR!Jesse", as there Jesse's kid is the only one present for DR!events (and thus that's a more """""canon""""" take on things), so anything with the other children is just for fun/speculation and to clear out the brain rot (though I am surprised it got as much traction as it did :d)

Andddd there's probably a bunch of other little-r ones I'm forgetting, but these have been the hot topics in my recent memory hgfhgfd

[14muffinz]

2/?

C1 (and prompt) / C2

It is extremely rare in Wayne manor that someone is completely awake at breakfast. Half the time, Bruce doesn’t even show up until the rest of the house’s residents have gone off to do something else.

Duke is picking at his eggs instead of, y’know, actually eating them, and is focusing extremely hard on not focusing his vision to the point of seeing bacteria that he frankly doesn’t need to be thinking about for anything except an extremely specific kind of case.

Somehow, Damian manages to maintain his proper posture, the only indication of his exhaustion being the occasional slow blink.

They’ve both got their phones on the table, observing and not responding as Steph and Tim lose their singular shared braincell over the fact that it’s not projected to rain at all today. The level of energy involved in the conversation suggests that neither of them have actually gone to bed yet.

He doesn’t process when Cass enters the room. There are more people than usual in the manor in order to greet the new arrival, but knowing that and remembering that are two different things.

Cass pokes him in the forehead, and Duke scrambles, nearly falling out of his chair.

When he collects himself, he’s receiving a smug smile from Damian, and a mischievous smile from Cass. He weakly glares at each of them, then stabs his eggs.

Dick slides into the room on his socks, tries to turn it into a smooth wall lean that really only makes him look cringe, then asks, “Does anyone know if the new kid is up?”

“His bedroom light wasn’t on,” Damian notes, “Though he may be elsewhere in the manor.”

“Cass, did you give him the tour yesterday?” Dick checks.

Cass shakes her head. “He was tired. He wouldn’t remember if I showed him around.”

“Fair enough. I can’t tell where I am in here half the time,” Duke admits.

“You have been here a year, Thomas,” Damian remarks.

Duke crosses his arms. “Time is a lie and we all know it.”

Cass lightly taps the table to draw attention back to her. She declares, “I can go bring him here. Show him that he’s welcome.”

“Good idea,” Dick chirps.

⠀

⠀

Half the time that Jason checks his phone, he wishes that he didn’t. The other half of the time, he’s lucky enough to get a text from anyone other than his adopted siblings.

He feels nothing but disappointment and anger when he checks his phone this morning. He’s resigned to the fact that his family gets into a lot of shit, and unfortunately he’s part of that shit sometimes, but it seems like Bruce has caved and brought in another kid, and this one isn’t even connected to vigilante shit.

Jason can’t even do shit about it. Since he’s legally dead, and had an extremely public grieving period, he can’t exactly show up to the manor without raising questions that will just have to be revised over and over until the kid finally figures out that he’s living with the Bats. It’s more of an annoyance than it is a source of entertainment.

He’s gotta check in on the new kid, though, no question about it. He doesn’t trust Bruce’s parenting skills as far as he can throw the guy, and even if Jason’s a vigilante, he can’t throw people very far.

Looking at the wall of texts on his phone, he observes that getting an ally on the inside is going to be harder than usual. He and Tim are usually on the same page when it comes to Bruce’s parenting, but from the way that he and Steph are texting, he’s indisposed due to exhaustion. Dick’s a decent option, since he’s also got reason to doubt Bruce, but he’d also try to examine Jason’s thoughts from every angle and Jason doesn't need that kind of introspection for what feels like an open and shut issue. Damian’s not an option because he’d defend Bruce, and is likely trying to pretend to hate the new kid for as long as possible.

Good news is, this family is so fucking big that he’s only exhausted about half his options.

Jason calls Cass, and she answers even though she’s in the middle of applying eye liner.

“So, the new kid,” he immediately prompts. “What can you tell me about him?”

“Secretive,” she fingerspells with her free hand. “Closed. Disconnected.”

Great, so yet another extremely traumatised kid for the collection, good to know. “How’d B find him?”

Cass sets down her eye-liner and purses her lips in thought. After a few seconds of waiting, she explains, “He worried CPP. Doesn’t speak. Doesn’t sign. Writes, but not to talk. Knows English, won’t use it. Won’t give name. Worried me.”

“Then he’s a case,” Jason deadpans.

She signs a sharp “no,” frowning. “Bruce wants to protect him.”

“He does that by making kids into cases,” Jason argues.

Cass glares at him through the phone screen. “We did that to ourselves.”

“Just–” Jason pinches the ever-present knot of tension between his brows, and fights to remain in control of his emotions. “Keep an eye on the kid for me, yeah?”

“Of course.”

⠀

⠀

Dick knocks on his new sibling’s door, and does not receive any indication that he’d been heard. Cass will usually knock on the wall or furniture to show that she’s aware someone’s knocking, but either their new sibling – John????? – hasn’t gotten that idea before, or he’s not up.

Right as he’s raising his fist to knock a second time, the door swings open. John – the guy doesn’t look like a John, why is the name they gave him so awkward – is wearing what looks to be the same outfit that he arrived in the day before, based on the picture Cass had snuck, though it’s not at all ruffled by sleep. There’s something dead-looking in his blue eyes that he wants to put up to exhaustion, but an instinct he’s never had a name for insists that it’s different from what he sees in his vigilante friends and family.

He hadn’t gotten the chance to meet John – he’s just going to have to give up, for now – yesterday. Dick had been waiting inside his own bedroom while texting Wally, and by the time he noticed the alert that John had arrived, the kid had already squirrelled away in his room.

That is to say that Dick isn’t at all prepared for how unsettling John really is. He stands completely still, meeting Dick’s eyes impassively, and does not speak a word. It’s only Dick’s hard-earned confidence that saves him from fumbling. “You want to come down to breakfast?”

No known allergies, Dick remembers without really meaning to. Will eat any food given to him, has not indicated any preferences or discomfort.

John blinks. Just blinks, once. He does not nod, shake his head, or do anything else. He blinks, and maybe Dick grew up with Bruce for a guardian, but he still has very little idea what to do with this new person’s nonverbal cues.

Dick takes a step back from the bedroom door, belatedly realising that he might be in John’s personal space, and then adds, “It’s a nice chance to get to know the people who are around the manor the most. A lot of our schedules don’t really line up.”

Aside from patrol, but Dick doubts that they’ll have anyone new joining them over the rooftops of Gotham for a while yet. If he can help it, John won’t get to that point at all.

John steps out of his doorway, reaching back to grab the door but not closing it. He quickly cases the hallway with a precision that turns Dick’s stomach, and then goes back to making unflinching eye contact.

He’s leaving his room, hasn’t ended the conversation, hasn’t frowned or shook his head. Dick’s not really one for physics, but he’s pretty sure that this is a net positive, and he’s clear to lead John to the dining room.

Dick gives a nod down the hall and a soft smile, and starts a mental chant of talk to Cass, talk to Cass, talk to Cass ASAP.

⠀

⠀

DW: Father’s collected yet another stray.

JK: new batkid just dropped?

DW: John.

JK: yeah yeah

JK: wait wtf did you, damian wayne, heir to the bat and the demon’s head and the superior robin, just spell my name wrong?

DW: No, John is the “name” of Father’s newest charge. He has not shared his true name, so his papers refer to him as John Doe.

DW: Also, neither of our fathers would appreciate how many secrets were just disclosed over a public channel, Jonathan.

JK: sorry

JK: so how’d your dad get another one?

DW: I’m uncertain. Likely, it was just to satiate his curiosity about John’s unique case.

JK: idk man, that doesn’t sound like b-man to me. he respects kids too much to use anyone to “satiate his curiosity”

DW: I will take that under consideration.

DW: Whatever the case, there is certainly an investigation to be had. Doe appears to be refusing to communicate for reasons unknown, despite having previously displayed an understanding of English.

JK: i think its UR curiosity that really needs to be satiated lol

JK: but there’s def cause for concern. if u need a lowkey lie detector to help out, just say the word

⠀

⠀

“I’m assembling a file, yeah,” Barbara admits without any fuss. “It’ll be helpful down the line to have everything we know in one place.”

She’s sitting at her at-home setup, nursing a cup of coffee and with a comm line open to Tim.

Tim hums in thought, and lets it drag way longer than is comfortable. Barbara knows that he and Steph have just returned from a steakout which didn’t turn out, and is slightly impressed that he hasn’t collapsed from exhaustion. There was probably caffeine involved. “Can I look at it?”

“Not ‘till you’ve met him,” Barbara insists.

“You haven’t even met him,” Tim argues.

“I’m just putting in what Bruce tells me to,” she tells him, shrugging. “It’s only been one night, anyways. There’s not much to see that wasn’t established before he showed up.”

She hears Tim. “If this has anything to do with a gang in the city—”

“Then we’ll be on top of it.”

“If this has anything to do with a player in the city,” Tim repeats insistently, “and not just the result of some fucked up form of abuse from a previous guardian, we really need to know about it. It’s been a while since I put in any research on the topic, but mutism usually stems from either some sort of brain or vocal cord injury, or is a trauma response, but from how I’ve heard him described, I’m getting a different impression of… refusing. Like in situations where an individual is being tortured, and has been taught not to give their captures anything to go off of, but in a much safer circumstance.”

Barbara purses her lips.

Tim’s not exactly wrong.

“There’s a lot left to rule out,” she replies carefully. “Knowing the Gotham system, there are probably medical examinations that were skipped for him. But I did notice something similar in the reports, yeah.”

⠀

⠀

Cass finds that yet again she does not have the words.

She’s been asked to describe the emotions she noticed in John Doe, but the problem is this: she didn’t notice anything. Nothing that she could call relaxation, surprise, tension, anything she’d expect in his current situation. She’s never met someone capable of completely masking their body language, but there’d been something undeniably wrong in the way that John Doe moved beside her.

There’s no doubt that several members of their family have warned Bruce not to turn this into a case. Yet, Cass still feels the need to watch her newest brother closely.

[cafecourage]

Ooo requests are open?? :D for a writing request, may I ask for platonic snuggles scenario in your Isekai AU with Y/N and each of the boys? Or you can just pick your favorite(s) boy(s) if you’d prefer! 💜

I am going to have to pick my favorite boy’s/ two call outs, only because I have another cuddle adjacent request so technically I will have to write the rest later. XD Sorry if these aren’t that long I am trying to get back to writing for LU again.

Sky:

The night comes slowly some days as you travel. The slower the day the harder it is. Since when time is dragging on your body tends to tire out sooner then later. The whole group understands that its not their first rodeo. However it was yours. Sky was always a tune to your issues unfortunately and has been keeping by your side in case of emergency. You don’t think you where that close to falling over but apparently he thought otherwise.

It was a blessing or a curse.

Sky was a teddy bear but also a momma bird. So as soon as the camp location was established he drags you to away from the commotion. Unceremoniously he sits down taking his sailcloth off in the same action. “Come on.” Was all he said when he gestures down to his side.

“I am not that tired.” You mumbled but its not really like you wanted to refuse this opportunity. Sky is warm and squishy. It’s not like you cuddle with him to often. “Oof.” You plop yourself next to him and claimed his left side. “Your trapped now, your not allowed to leave.” You said with a yawn.

“I thought you said you weren’t that tired.” Sky teased as he drapes the sailcloth on the two of you like a blanket. You grumbled and smack his shoulder which only made him laugh.

Sky’s snuggles are the definition of hiding under the covers from a cold day. Warm and fuzzy.

Warriors:

You frown as this was getting ridiculous, there was a pattern you had notice recently with Warriors. He just wouldn’t wake anyone up until third shift. It’s not really something that would be brought up normally if you hadn’t signed up for second shift multiple times to get some late night internal monologuing done. You slowly get up from your spot where you were journaling and came closer to the fire. Not even asking you take part of the Captains scarf and wrap it around your neck as you lean into him. “Excuse you.” He said not amused by your shenanigans. “Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

“Says the one that doesn’t wake up the next watch.” You fire back opening up your journal ones more. There was obviously something bothering him for him to not want to sleep the past few days. It’s not really good to force something like this out of a person and it doesn’t seem like he was going to talk easy especially this soon in your journey with the boys.

There wasn’t much he could argue with that given the circumstances “doesn’t mean you need to lose sleep,” was his argument. “Don’t suffer for my sake.”

You can’t help but roll your eyes at him “I’m not. I can’t sleep anyway.” There was an attempt to shut down the argument. “I’ll go to sleep when I can.” You then offered.

After some beats of silence and plotting in your braincell to wake up Twilight for his shift, the Captain puts his arm around you “fine.” He brings you closer a bit. Shifting your body you use his shoulder as your headrest. “What are you writing anyway?” He turns the topic to something else. Something less heavy of an topic. And with a smile you started to use this shift to explain to him about the history of Hyrule with some info missing of course.

Honestly? Snuggling with Warriors is rare at the start, but he is protective and sturdy. The Captain is the definition of safety.

Twilight:

Between Wolfie and the man, choosing when to give snuggles is a hard pick to make. There has been many times where Wolfie ends up being a giant heated plushie that you ensnare with your arms and legs. Truly a curse of being a furnace. But hey, you benefit from it.

Wolf snuggles tend to be rare as Twilight can’t really stay long as the longer his person was away the more the other links start to noticed. Which was why he tended to be the blanket or teddy bear replacement.

Cuddling with Twilight, the man, the myth, the not actually legend? Heaven. Absolutely heavnly as because he was a human furnace he mainly ends up as a mattress for you and wild. Playing with your hair braiding it slowly as he attempts to sleep himself as he was trapped. Sometimes he would switch to Wild as to make sure both of you get equal amount of attention from the resident older brother.

He was a magnet to the other boys as well. That always ends up with a cuddle pile since Twilight has this weird case of giving hugs and cuddles that are secure. It’s not in the protective way but more calming. Like he washed it away any issues that were in your mind to begin with.

Thats just who Twilight is though.

He might be annoying with nagging you to be more careful in this adventure, but he really is the definition of home.

Time:

You love the chain. Each Link was amazing and courageous in the own ways. But they are also very, very, chaotic sometimes. Which normally would be fun and fine, if your social battery was on the same wavelength. At the end of lunch there was little for you to do since it was a free day. The boy’s were training to let out some energy that has been built up.

There was a goal in your head though. You were aiming to do one thing the whole day and that was to sleep, and there was one man for that job.

You find Time sitting by the boy’s that had signed up to fight. It didn’t look like he was going to join them today. So perfect for your plans.

“Time.”

Was your only warning before you literally fall on the oldest link’s back. You needed a battery recharge and a hug. Both would be good please. You wanted both. You could feel the sigh from your laying spot as he has to awkwardly shift position to drag you on his lap. As soon as he has you it was Koala time. Time didn’t even blink or acknowledge your presence as he kept watch of the spars in front of him. Slowly thought his hand finds it’s way up to your hair. Not braiding it but just playing with it out of habit.

Time cuddles are the ultimate recharge, it was similar to Twilights but on a bigger scale. Safe probably more softer as its easier to hide from the world in Time’s arms. Plus the warmth of sun and tuning out the clashing of the wooden swords its no wonder you instantly fall asleep.

[wisteriasymphony]

The LuckyBug Miracle Team Sucks - TWEOS AU Analysis

(4 individuals who don't work for their miraculous, and 1 person that does)

Just to start off, yes, I am analyzing my own work. Nobody really has the same depth of information on this other than me, after all. I want to get more into these sorts of things, because I like to organize my thinking behind the choices I make in this fic, and maybe even draw people into my work as well!

Lucky Lucky Ladybug - Viperius - CARA.PACE - Renared - Chat Noir

These are the five main holders of the LuckyBug Team before CN quits at the start of TWEOS. We're going to be talking about why most of them suck at their job (but mostly why Lucky chose terrible miraculouses for her peers), starting from worst to best synergy.

Viperius - Snake of Intuition

The ideal holder of the Snake Miraculous is someone who is level-headed, wise, and capable.

Luka Marcel Couffaine is the exact opposite of all of these things.

In TWEOS, Luka Couffaine is as far removed from empathy as humanly possible, making him a terrible superhero in general, much less one with a power as important as interrupting the flow of time. Luka never goes out of his way to explore his abilities, rarely involves himself in battle unless forced to, and put more thought into giving his superhero form a sexy haircut than into being a good teammate. He is explicitly only a superhero for the money it brings in even though he is already the son of a world-famous rockstar. Luka is not intuitive or wise, he is shallow and self-serving.

More Suitable Miraculous: None of them. Maybe the Mouse so he can multiply and go fuck himself.

CARA.PACE - Turtle of Protection

The ideal holder of the Turtle Miraculous is someone who is stable, sacrificial, and steadfast.

Nicolas Ibrahim Lahiffe, unfortunately, falls short of the mark.

While not as outwardly shitty as Luka, Nino also lacks the right qualities in an effective superhero. Nino is the type of person who, as Quinton Reviews once perfectly put it, "would rather be chill than be right". Nino is laid-back and likes to show off with his Miraculous, enjoying how cool it makes him look while still helping out at the end of the day. ...But he's not exactly protective. If anyone even stood up to Lucky being physically abusive, it should've been him. But Nino does not protect the weak, because he is the kind of person to stand on the sidelines. Nino is not a source of stability, he's too much of a laid-back (and often cowardly) jokester to protect anyone.

More Suitable Miraculous: Monkey, Pig.

Renared - Fox of Illusion

The ideal holder of the Fox Miraculous is someone who is cunning, sly, and witty.

Aaliyah Thérèse Césaire is trying so hard to make it work, but is underserved by what she's been given.

If anyone in the team has the braincells, it's Alya. Alya can draft up plans with her Holo-Illusions like second nature, strategize on the fly, and takes to her ability to make diagrams out of thin air like a fish to water. ...But that's not what the Illusions are for, is it? As natural for her determined nature, she strives to bend her miraculous to her will anyways, rarely ever using her Illusions to actually distract and more to help her with her thankless job of the actual team leader. It makes sense that she would function this way, though! Alya is a proponent of the truth through and through, and is rather blunt often to the point of being brutally honest. Alya is not cunning, she is forthright and stubborn. If only she got a miraculous to reflect that.

More Suitable Miraculous: Ox, Rooster, Bee

Lucky Lucky Ladybug - Ladybug of Creation

The ideal holder of the Ladybug Miraculous is someone who is creative, compassionate, and clever.

Marinette Anne Louise Dupain-Cheng is this in all the wrong fucking ways.

It does take a creative person to formulate a plan to woo your celebrity crush with a perfect version of you. It takes someone who knows how to be compassionate to so effectively deny a shred of it to Chat Noir. It takes a clever person to make up a fake eulogy. And yet, at the same time, Lucky Lucky Ladybug is hindered by her hot-headed entitlement and her need to be the center of attention. She lets her team do the creative work, weaponizes her compassion as something to market herself with, and is somehow so caught up in her own world that she ignores evidence of Adrien being a relationship when it is staring her in the face. Marinette is best described as an embodiment of "creation" only in the sense that she will one day orchestrate her own undoing.

More Suitable Miraculous: Anything would be better than the Ladybug. That way she isn't brainwashing people anymore.

Chat Noir/Errant - Black Cat of Destruction

The ideal— Actually, let's break from convention for this one.

If anyone is fit to embody Destruction, it is Adrien fucking Agresté.

Once you get deep enough into TWEOS, Adrien is by far the most emotionally turbulent character out of any of them. It helps that the narration is so often colored by his input, but his range is exceptional and takes up a significant focus of the story. He is the mostly openly self-destructive and suicidal, romanticizing the idea of dying with his girlfriend, but is equally willing to destroy others in pursuit of his goals.

It's also worth taking into account that TWEOS is essentially a corruption arc. The whole point of the story is to witness his circumstances tear him apart, unearth his traumas, show a version of Adrien that becomes bitter and violent and vengeful. What power would suit a vengeful, violent person better than the power to destroy things?

Conclusion

In short, it's meant to be incredibly ironic that the only holder that truly embodies their miraculous is the one that quits. The entire ordeal is a stageplay put on by higher powers, of course it's more important to them that their puppets are obedient more than anything.

Of course, this isn't to say that synergy between a person and their miraculous is a good thing, either; That's what makes the eventual magic-induced insanity even worse, after all. This is what killed Emilie, what's ruining Marinette's relationships, and what is starting to happen to Adrien as well.