#he also did the rap in the middle
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
madkiska · 3 months ago
Text
Regularly scheduled reminder that CaptainSparklez himself animated Revenge
14 notes · View notes
alukaforyou · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
sometimes i think about this txt cover of invitation and... that long haired guy is just choso with his hair down TO ME
82 notes · View notes
dyingstarsinyoursky · 8 months ago
Text
Excuse me, but Slash... SLASH!
Bruuuhhhh Stray Kids really come out with another bang, just a few days after a banger like Chk Chk Boom
Like the intro??!?
The instrumental in the intro is insane! Absolutely genius.
And then Felix comes in with that fucking awesome deep rap?!?!
I'm gagged
For real! The whole song is fucking amazing, but the intro has me by the throat.
I can imagine that intro playing in the Deadpool movie, just as a badass fighting scene is about to go down. Like the fight hasn't started yet, but that intro starts playing, and you're like "uuuhhh shit's about to go down"
3racha really did it again! 👌
youtube
2 notes · View notes
frascospecimen · 8 months ago
Text
I’m so charmed by the donkey kong 64 soundtracks use of trombone
4 notes · View notes
sassyandclassy94 · 6 months ago
Text
Some day when I get married I’m gonna wear a pale blue dress instead of a white one. Why, you ask? Because pale/light blue was the color of purity during the Middle Ages and even though I’m a 1930s and 1940s nerd, I’m still and always will be a medieval nerd at the core of my soul.
(Plus every wedding tradition America has COMES from the medieval period. The groom not seeing the bride till she walks down the aisle? That’s because, with arranged marriages, the father of the bride didn’t want the groom to run away if the bride was ugly. Same with the veil. The tradition of bridesmaids and groomsmen? The bridesmaids were there to confuse the evil spirits so they wouldn’t curse the bride. The groomsmen were there to protect the groom from the father during the… ehem… consummation later that day. And you don’t see this is as often as Union candles but the tying of a ribbon around the bride and groom’s joined wrists? Symbolize their lives becoming one.)
1 note · View note
sollucets · 2 years ago
Note
🎶✨️when u get this u have to put 5 songs u actually listen to, publish. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)🎶✨️
ah! more music memes!! i'm delighted to, thank you very much ✨️ spotify didn't want to link anything for me this time, thanks extremely functional website, so these are all youtube links
i can break your heart too / the aces
off the of playlist; i yearn for mess :') and i just like the melody loop
a beginner's guide to destroying the moon / foster the people
this is actually the first song on my akkaye playlist. for you and i, i will breathe in all the truth I can stomach if it keeps you alive
hollow moon / the crane wives
i made a lyric edit to this song recently (spoilers for august 19th c:)
m.i.a. / stray kids
as previously established if i don't listen to at least an hour of skz bsides each week i'll collapse
roses are falling / orville peck
spent a good bit of my last close trying to convince 2 teenagers i work with that there are good country songs, actually
1 note · View note
studioeisa · 4 months ago
Text
is it casual now? (teaser) 🫀 seungcheol x reader.
Tumblr media
★ seungcheol x makeup artist!f!reader. ★ teaser word count: ~8,000 ★ genre/warnings: mdni. 18+ content. situationship/friends with benefits, light angst, use of pet name ('love'). soft dom!seungcheol, making out, biting/marking, protected sex. let me know if i missed anything! ★ footnotes: this has been on my backburner for months. it's admittedly a full-blown story in need of hard editing, and so i'm posting this in hopes of bullying myself into working on the whole thing. should it come down to it, though, i like to think this can stand on its own. enjoy. <3
Tumblr media
Seungcheol has been in the industry long enough to know that everybody had vices.
Trainees, rookies, veterans. It didn't matter. There were dangerous, risky vices. Alcohol, drugs, smoking. There was dating, too, of course. Dating fans, dating fellow idols.
Seungcheol didn't do drugs. He smoked socially, but he would rather not. And he drank, sure, but never to an unhealthy amount. Dating, however—
Did it really count when there was only really ever one person he treated like a vice?
You've been in his life since the group debuted. Nine years, give or take. And then, at one point, he just... tried something with you. And it clicked, fell into place, and now you've been sneaking around for the better half of three years. It's the one place Seungcheol feels like he can breathe, can get away. But it's also the biggest secret he's kept.
You're his makeup artist, after all.
When the two of you started off, you both insisted on nothing serious. To 'keep it casual'.
That worked perfectly for Seungcheol. He likes to think it's still working for him, as he raps at the door of your apartment and waits for you to open up. His wristwatch says that it's midnight, but it doesn't matter. He knocks a little louder, growing a touch impatient.
You open the door, and you're greeted with Seungcheol looking reproachful. "Yah," he chides. "Why haven't you been answering my texts?"
When you rub your eyes with the back of your hands and look over your shoulder to glimpse at your wall clock, Seungcheol almost feels apologetic. Almost. “Cheol,” you say exasperatedly, slowly. “It’s the middle of the night.” 
"So you were sleeping then, hmm?" Seungcheol says. The corner of his lips tilt up, just slightly. He leans against the doorframe, taking a brief amount of time to glance you over. As he does, a small wave of tiredness finally washes over him— just how late had he kept himself up working on new music? "I sent you texts hours ago."
"You didn't even read them." He reaches up, tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. He sighs, the sound almost exaggerated. "How cruel of you."
You let out a low hum at Seungcheol’s fingers brushing against your skin. “Mmm, I fell asleep with my phone in my hand,” you admit, the words coming out more like a soft sigh than anything else.
You seem to finally drag yourself out of your sleepy state to give Seungcheol a once-over. He knows it shows all over— the exhaustion in his eyes, his stance. He’s tired, and you can tell. You’ve always been able to tell. 
You step aside a bit and he takes that as his cue. Seungcheol moves past you, a small hum in the back of his throat. He toes off his shoes and shuts the door behind him with a soft click. In spite of himself, the moment he's inside, he reaches for you. 
One arm is loosely slung over your shoulders, pulling you in close. He rests his chin on your shoulder, the tip of his nose against your neck.
"You fell asleep..." he gripes. "Do you know how many texts I sent you? I sent five.” 
“Five”” you repeat as you bear Seungcheol’s weight. Your hand instinctively raises to stroke the base of his hair behind his neck, and he thinks he could melt then and there— your soothing touch, your light tone. “Oh, how ever will you live?”
Seungcheol huffs into the crook of your neck. The feel of your fingers in his hair does wonders to combat the tired, stressed part of himself. Slowly, his shoulders relax, and he sighs, the sound long and deep.
"Don't get snarky with me," he mutters. But there's no bite to it at all, just a quiet sense of contentment in his voice. "You could've at the very least read the messages." He moves, presses a kiss to your neck. "Would've taken ten seconds."
“I was asleep,” you protest, but— whether or not you notice— your head is tilting around a bit to press a lingering kiss on to the side of his face.Seungcheol's stomach flutters. You're sweet like that. Always have been, always will be. He hums under his breath at the kiss, his hand that's on your shoulder moves up to cup your cheek.
“That’s my penance,” you say drowsily. 
"One kiss isn't nearly enough," he tells you. 
He pulls back from your shoulder to look at you, now. The eye contact, the way he regards you, has a more focused weight. He takes a moment to look you over again— hair mussed, face still flushed faintly from sleep. "Two,” he says in a tone that brokers no argument. 
“Greedy,” you mumble, but both of you know it doesn’t matter. 
Not when your free hand finds purchase at his side and you use your fingers in his hair to pull him down so you don't have to stand on your tiptoes. Not when you press your lips together into a kiss that's soft and sweet, almost sleepy.
All it takes is the sound of your voice for Seungcheol to be pulled in— when you tug at his hair, he follows, his chest against yours. He bends down, his own hands coming up to the sides of your face.
He melts against your mouth, his eyes closing in an instant. But it’s done as quickly as it started. You pull away, your face still inches away from Seungcheol’s, as you smilingly mumble to him, “There. Two kisses.” 
His eyes open again once you pull away, his grip on your face tightening just slightly. "Three," he mutters back, and then he leans back in. 
You hum against his mouth, the sound breaking free from the back of your throat. You’re both so tired from your respective work and it shows in the kiss. No heat, no fire. Your tongue swiping over his lip makes Seungcheol hum, quiet and low in his throat. He's usually so used to being the one who takes control, making the first move, but here with you, in the early hours of the morning— there's something else to it.
He pulls you closer against him, his hands moving down to your hips. Against your mouth, he murmurs, "Four," before his tongue slips in, just to get a taste. Just to linger, just to savor, but not take over.
“Cheol,” you huff, though your reprimand is tempered by the way Seungcheol is intent on keeping the kiss going. “You’re— mmph— being greedy—” 
"Five—" he sighs against your mouth. "Let me be greedy a second more."
One of his hands moves to the back of your head, fingers tangling up in your hair. This is what he likes, this is what he always comes to you for. Something that's simple. This, he can deal with. This, he can handle.
It’s never a second more with Seungcheol. He’s always out the door when he can go, when he has to. He’s never been a glutton for time, and so it’s enough for you to sense that something is wrong. 
You break away from him. 
Seungcheol has to resist a whine when you pull back, his eyes fluttering open in a daze. Your hand has moved to his face and you’re looking up at him with a small frown and a quiet query. “Long week?” 
He lets your question hang in the air for a moment, the hand in your hair loosening its grip, fingers just idly combing through the strands.
He glances at your face— the furrow of your brow, the hint of concern in your eyes— and it makes him sigh. He turns his head to press a soft, quick kiss to your palm.
"Long year," he corrects.
You look like you want to say more. Seungcheol almost begs you not to. This— whatever the two of you have— it’s an outlet that won’t break him, won't ruin him, won't tarnish him or the group's name. He just wants— he needs—
You know exactly what he needs, even if he doesn’t always know himself. “How do you want your fifth kiss?” you ask instead of commenting on his obvious fatigue. 
Your question makes Seungcheol's head empty out in an instant.
It takes him a moment to think, to consider. His mind, hazy and tired as it is, struggles to come up with an adequate answer. All he knows is that he's comfortable, that he's tired, that you're here. And that's all he really needs, in the end.
He lets his hand fall from your hair, to the nape of your neck. "... Soft," he murmurs. "Soft and easy."
You’re back up on your tiptoes to give him what he asked for. A sweet, slow press of your lips against his. It’s a kiss that lovers give each other, even though you’re the furthest from that. 
It's easy, easy, easy for him to fall into the kiss just like that, a shudder running down his spine when your tongue doesn't invade him. It's sweet, it's chaste, it's simple. It's exactly the kind of kiss he needs after a week of work.
His hand on your neck moves to your cheek, his thumb brushing over the skin there. He breaks away for a mere second, a fraction of a beat, to catch his own breath, but he kisses you right back after. 
"Six," he whispers desperately. "Again."
This time, you laugh against his mouth— a slightly muffled sound, not any less amused— but you give in, still. When you separate for air again, one of your hands rests on his chest to keep him away. “You have to let me breathe, Cheol,” you huff. 
Seungcheol has to resist groaning outright when your palm on his chest keeps him from coming in for another kiss. You're adorable like this, in the middle of the night, with sleep in your eyes and annoyance in your voice.
He knows he's being needy, taking advantage, but at the same time? It's all he seems to be able to do. Greedy, he hears you call him, and it's true.
"I'll let you breathe when I get my seventh kiss, then," he grumbles.
He can see the annoyance blooming on your expression, but he’s saved by one thing and one thing alone: The fact that you can get pretty greedy sometimes, too, especially when Seungcheol was involved. 
"Fine," you say haughtily, feigning annoyance. "Just one more kiss."
Seungcheol's eyes glimmer with something akin to mischief. His hands move to your face again, his own lips curving up in a smirk. You give him an inch, he wants a mile. It's his style. "One more kiss. That I can work with."
He brushes a thumb over your cheek again, his grip in your hair loosening only to brush some stray strands away from your face. "Only fair that I get to pick the way, then," he says, his tone low.
He's going to make the most of this opportunity, and you're letting him.
His tongue darts out briefly to lick over his bottom lip. "Open your mouth."
When you let out a noncommittal hom and oblige, parting your lips, he knows he’s gone. Seeing the obedience in your face makes Seungcheol's stomach do a little bit of an excited flip. You're like this, this, even when you're tired, when you're barely awake.
It's a little addicting.
"Good," he says softly. It's all the warning you get before he's got his mouth on yours again.
He kisses you— devours you, his tongue parting your lips, sliding into your mouth, taking. The kiss is almost bruising and seems to throw you off balance, but you quickly recover by pressing flush against Seungcheol and holding the sides of his arms. If he were a better person, Seungcheol would let this be the last one. Would let this kiss end and call it a night. 
But then the smallest of sounds escape you. A whimper, a soft noise that only makes all sense fly right out of Seungcheol's head. It's not fair, he thinks, that you still have a hold on him even in the middle of the night.
All it makes him do is pull you closer— press you up against the wall with his entire body, his hands still gripping your face as he kisses you deep. Harder than he usually would, rougher than he normally did.
He swallows the sound, his tongue still in your mouth.
Your fingernails are pressing into his biceps now. Your tongue is sinking into his lower lip; not quite biting, but enough to drag his focus away for a moment. "Seung," you sigh, and it’s like music to his goddamn ears. 
He was Choi or Seungcheol when he was in your makeup chair. Cheol, when it was just the two of you. But Seung was something different entirely. 
A small moan, low and quiet, gets caught in Seungcheol's throat when you bite into his lip, when you whine out his name like that. He knows what it means when you call him like that— knows what he's in for.
He relishes in it. In moments like these when he gets to be like this. When he doesn't have to be responsible, when he doesn't have to be a leader. He gets to be just Seung.
There isn't a single part of his body that's not on fire right now, not when he's got you pinned against the wall, not when you're all satin and soft against him. His grip on your face tightens, and now his lips are no longer on your mouth, but on your jaw, moving down to your neck, your throat.
A quiet, needy little ah falls out your lips when he nips at that spot on your pulse point, and there, there is exactly when he knows that he's got you exactly where he wants you. Pinned by his body, shaking and shivering like he's touching you for the first time.
If he was feeling a little less riled up, a little less needy, he'd keep up the teasing. But he can't, not now. His hands move from your face to your hips, moving under the satin of your pajamas. It's not enough, never enough.
Every sound that leaves your mouth, every little please, just, already sets a fire in his brain. Every part of his mind turns to static, white noise, as he keeps his lips on your throat, your neck, biting and nipping at your skin.
“Seung,” you hiss, your hands flying to his shoulders as you press your back on to the entryway wall, willing yourself not to crumple. “I’m going to get a noise complaint again—”
“I'll pay the fine,” he murmurs against your skin, his lips against your collarbone now, his hands still on your hips. His brain is starting to grow fuzzy, his thoughts less coherent, but this was the goal.
To get you like this. Soft and shaking and desperate. To make you his for the night, for just a little while. To hold some sort of control over something in his life.
“You can't just keep paying for— ah— the fines,” you’re babbling. “They're going— t-to kick me— Seung, fuck!"
Whatever you’re trying to say dies out when Seungcheol nips at your warm skin. The rational part of him, somewhere deep, deep inside, knows that you're right. He can't keep paying your fines for complaints of loud music and loud sex.
The part of him that's currently working on painting a bruise on your collarbone doesn't seem to care all that much.
"I'll pay," he repeats, between leaving a few more marks on your skin for good measure. "As many times as I have to—"
“Jesus Christ,” you cuss, your chest heaving as Seungcheol’s hand moves higher and higher up your shirt. “My neighbors are so fucking sick of me, and it’s all your fault.”
“My fault?” Even through the haze in his head, Seungcheol can't help the low scoff that he lets out. He wants to say that he couldn't care less about your neighbors— wants to say that your pretty mouth makes up for the noise, but something else catches his attention. The brush of his fingers on bare skin. 
His eyes go wide, his brain suddenly clearing.
"You're not wearing anything underneath your pajamas," he deadpans, his voice coming out in a low drawl.
Of course, that adds up. You hadn’t been expecting Seungcheol, after all, so he can’t blame you for foregoing the underclothes. Still, it only stokes the growing flame in the base of his stomach. Especially when you move your head back against the wall so you’re looking right up at Seungcheol, the ghost of a smirk on your face. 
“Wanna check for yourself?” you taunt. 
A low groan falls out of Seungcheol's mouth as soon as you ask that. Like clockwork, his hands go to the hem of your shirt, pulling the fabric up slightly. Just a little bit, just to see if you're really not wearing anything beneath.
"You always like to tease," he says, his voice low. That hint of a smirk on your face is only serving to drive him that much crazier. "Go on, then. Show me, since you want to act all cocky."
You give him half an eye roll that’s more affectionate than anything else before reaching over to the back of your pajama collar. You pull the top over your head in one deft, swift movement. Seungcheol's eyes go wide for just a moment, taking in the sight of you, undressed, in front of him. It never stops shocking him, never stops making his heart thump a little harder, his breath coming out a little more labored.
“Happy?” you half-joke, your voice low. 
He looks at you, up and down, before his eyes go back to your face. His hands move from your hips to your waist, fingers tracing over the sides of your chest as he shakes his head.
"Not yet," he says. "But I will be."
His hands keep tracing over your skin, his touch light— almost feathery, as he keeps his eyes fixed on your face. There's something about seeing you so exposed like this that's driving him absolutely insane, something about you being entirely at his mercy that's making his eyes grow dark.
He leans in, bringing his lips just past your ear. "Turn around," he murmurs, almost like a command.
He sees how you swallow hard, how you take in the familiar darkness in Seungcheol’s gaze. You know him, have known him for years, and that comes with trust. Unflinchingly, you twist around in his arms to press your chest against the wall. 
He has you practically trapped, all against his chest and the wall. His eyes look at you up and down, taking in your bare shoulders and back, the way you've submitted to him so perfectly.
His hands go to your hips again, and his eyes look over your back, following the line of your bare spine. "What do you say we find a use for this wall besides me just pushing you up against it," he murmurs. "Hm?"
“Yes, please,” you whimper, and as soon as you agree, Seungcheol's hands tighten on your hips, his grip almost bruising as he pulls you a little closer to him. You're not going anywhere, not when he's got you like this.
He leans in, his body practically pressing up against your back, his chest against your skin. He bites down on your shoulder, pulling a strangled whine out from somewhere deep in your throat. "You look so goddamn pretty like this, love," he murmurs against your skin.
His hands move from your hips to your chest, tracing the skin there before he brings them up to your throat. He presses his fingers against your pulse point, feeling the thump thump thump of your heartbeat.
He can feel your heart thrumming against his hand, can practically hear you shaking. It's driving him absolutely insane— you, underneath him, trembling for him. The knowledge that he's got you like this, the fact that you're letting him take control, letting him do whatever he wants.
He moves his mouth to that spot on your neck again, the skin that's so sensitive that it makes you whimper and shiver. He always finds it so easy to tease those sounds out of you, and always relishes in doing it.
His hands stay at your neck, his fingers still pressed against your pulse point. This had always been one of Seungcheol's little habits— a single finger on your pulse point, as if he liked seeing which actions would make your heart rate spike, which words would have it hammering.
Seungcheol presses his lips on your skin again. "You're so loud."
He marvels at the way you ball your hands into fists, the way you shake all over with poorly concealed want and need as he keeps nipping and marking. "‘M not," you gasp, lurching forward against the wall. "‘M perfectly— hng!"
Everything is working in his favor.
You're shaking, and your heart is racing, and every noise you make is just more fodder for him. God, he loves it. Loves being the one to make you absolutely tremble and shiver like this. Loves the fact that he's the only one to make you feel like this.
"You're mine," he says again, bringing his mouth closer to your ear. He bites the shell of it, hard, before letting out a low hum.
This is his favorite place in the entire world— right against your back, feeling your body heat against his chest, his tongue running over your skin. He loves how reactive you are to him, how sensitive you are, how your body just melts under his touch.
"Say it," he mutters against your skin. "Who's in control?"
There it is. The million won question.
The whole reason you started these rendezvouses in the first place. He had been spinning out of control, and you had been lonely, and you clicked into place like magnets. 
You give in, like you always do. The words are a soft whimper, almost a shout in your otherwise empty apartment. "You. You're in control, Seung."
That's all he wants to hear.
He digs his fingers into your jaw and wrenches your head so it's turned to look at him, his lips inches from yours. Even if there's a little pain, nothing in him is stopping. "Good," he mutters, his breath hot against your lips. "Good girl."
The kiss that follows is absolutely messy, the kind of kiss where it's just tongue and teeth and raw need. It's worlds different from the soft and easy kisses that Seungcheol asked for earlier, when he first came in complaining about five unanswered texts.
"Seung," you groan as you pull away for air. "Please—" 
When you moan his name, it's like something snaps.
He growls low, his fingers slipping into the waistband of your shorts, gripping the fabric hard enough that there's a very real chance of them ripping. "Please what?" he mumbles against your neck. "You need to tell me what you need, love. Use your words."
"I hate you," you whine, and Seungcheol nearly smiles. He knows you’re not fond of begging, but he needs to hear it from you. At least, he wants to. 
"You know what I—" you’re saying, but dammit, his control is already razor thin as is. He rips off the last fabric of clothing on you until you’re completely bare, pressed entirely up between the wall and him. 
Somehow, your mind still has some shrivel of coherence to complain, "I liked this set, asshole!"
He grins against your skin at your words, chuckling at your whine, at the way you're just reacting to him. You can act annoyed, you can act like you don't need him, but he knows. "I'll buy you a new one," he hums, finally letting go of your shorts and letting them fall to the floor in tatters. "One for me to rip to shreds all over again."
That thought alone makes his blood sing.
It takes you a great effort to turn around, but somehow you manage. Seungcheol is still fully clothed and so your bare chest presses against the front of his shirt. The sight of you, naked, his hands at your hips, pressed right up against him, against his chest like this— he's gone.
And then you’re asking him, low and sweet as he has you caged in, "Where are you going to fuck me tonight, Seung?"
He can't even manage a word for a moment, his hands holding you so tight that he's definitely going to leave marks on your skin, his eyes fixed on your face.
He swallows hard, his mouth suddenly dry at the question. "You want me to say it out loud, hm?"
You go to steal the upper hand for a minute or so, and you do it so effectively. Your hand rises almost lazily to his neck, your finger instinctively finding his pulse point. He feels his heart rate speed up as he watches, just watches, you do it. You stand on your tiptoes to raise your lips directly to his ear. 
All he can feel is the thunder of his heart racing against your hand. You seem to notice it, too, if the smile on your face is any indication. 
"How about you just show me instead?" you say, and he’s convinced he’ll pass out then and there. 
"You're a brat," he mutters through gritted teeth, his hand moving up from your hips and up your spine. "A brat who needs to be taught a lesson."
He takes a shuddering breath, almost completely lost in your little game, before he snaps back to himself. Seungcheol's hand leaves your hip and goes to your hand, gripping your wrist hard. "On the sofa," he says, and it’s nothing short of a command. 
He practically drags you on to the piece of furniture, watching intently as you fall back with a small oomph. Seungcheol stands on the edge of the couch as you prop yourself up by the elbows to watch him right back. 
The sight of you underneath him— your hair splayed against the cushions, your eyes half-lidded and fixed on him? It's absolutely perfect. It's the kind of thing that he wants to keep in his mind forever, the sight he wants to always be able to remember.
He lets out a noise under his breath as he undoes the button of his jeans, the sound of the zipper going down obscenely loud in the quiet room. "Gorgeous,” he breathes. 
He gets his jeans undone and kicked off, his shirt following them not long after, and then he's on top of you, caging you in, his hands either side of your head, staring down at you.
The look in his eyes isn't something he really gets to show often— that raw need, that want, how desperate he is for you. He wants you, God, he wants you so badly, and you're letting him have you.
He dips his head to your neck, his lips against your skin, his breath hot against your pulse point, still absolutely obsessed with that spot. His hands find your wrists, pinning them back against the couch, while his knee finds its way between your thighs, pressing up against you.
You arch and squirm underneath him, visibly distressed with the facsimile of friction that you’re getting from his knee. “Seung,” you pant, grinding your dripping core against his knee. It sends a jolt of electricity through him. “Please— don’t wanna wait any more—”
“Where’s all that snark now, hm?” he teases, his teeth running over the skin on your neck. But he’s not any better off, his own self-control slipping through his very fingers as his hips grind down against you desperately. 
"Been driving me insane, love," he whispers, pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses along the line of your neck. "Been dreaming about this for days. Missing you—” 
A low keen escapes you, and he can only echo it as you tug at the last piece of material separating you. “Can we get this off already, please?” you huff as you hook your fingers at the waistband of his boxer shorts. 
He groans against your skin, his teeth finally letting go when he lifts his head to look down at you, the expression on his face looking like he's fighting for control. "God, yes," he groans, lifting his hips just enough for you to tug them off him.
He kicks them off once you’ve yanked them down, and his hand— which has instinctively gravitated to your pulse point— feels how the beat absolutely skyrockets. One of your arms goes around his shoulder and the other, surprisingly, clutches his jaw.
You’re looking right at him as you say, "Fast and hard, Seung."
"Yeah?" he says, just the slightest hint of a surprise in his voice. "You want me to be rough with you, love?"
Seungcheol was usually a sweet lover. He liked taking his time, liked being gentle and responsible even in bed.
But there were particularly rough weeks, terrible days, where he just needed a means to an end. Where the sex was an outlet, where the best thing you could be for him was his. 
He waits for your permission, because he still always remembers to ask no matter how far deep you’re in. The agreement comes in the form of the best three words. 
"Ruin me, Seung."
You know him too well. You know how he works, you know how he thinks, and you know him better than anyone.
He groans in response to your words, his head dipping down to drag his teeth gently over your collarbone. He's trying to hang on to his control, he is, but it's a losing effort.
"I will, love." His breath is hot against your skin, his hands finding your hips. "Just give me a minute—"
He shifts, just for a moment, to find the condom in his jean pocket. He goes through the motions until he's back on top of you again, one hand coming up to grip your hip again, the other coming up to rest against your throat. He looks down at you, his eyes almost glowing. 
"You trust me?" he mutters. His hand at your hip tightens; his hand at your throat barely clenches around your pulse point, his eyes never leaving yours.
You can feel it, see it. The way the little threads are beginning to unravel and fray. The way this was no longer Seungcheol of SEVENTEEN; not the leader, not the idol. This was something different entirely, someone else completely.
"I do," you whisper back, your eyes so full of adoration for him that he has to bite back the urge to scream. "I trust you, Seungcheol."
His full name is what really does it for him, because then he's pushing in, and you’re gasping, whimpering, trying to adjust around him and the fact that you’re practically clenching him on the get-go. Seungcheol eases in, nice and slow, because you’re too tightly coiled for him to do more than carefully bottom out. You’re both heaving, your breaths coming out as gasps; your own breaths are sharp, harsh, because Seungcheol is still choking you a little. 
His head dips down to your shoulder because he needs something to hold on to, anything, while his mind spins. His head is dizzy feeling you like this, feeling you around him so tightly. He's trembling, his thighs shaking, but he's holding himself back as long as he can.
When Seungcheol gets as far in as he can possibly get, you let out twin groans. He’s completely sheathed inside of you and you’re fluttering around him in a way that’s dangerous. 
“Y’can move, Seung,” you reassure him after a moment, the words coming out strained with desire. “As fast and hard as you want.” 
You sound strangled, just like he feels, and it's taking him a mammoth amount of control to hold himself back. He groans against your shoulder at the sound of your voice, the words you say. He wants to move, to thrust, but he's trying to have some semblance of composure. 
"Love," he says, his voice wrecked. "I—"
His voice breaks. It breaks, because there is only so much he can take, and he's beyond that point now. There's a tremor in his thighs, his hands clenching in the cushion below you.
You drag him right back down, with the sound that you let out that’s halfway a whine and a sigh. One of your hands goes to rest in the space between Seungcheol’s shoulder blades, as if to steady the two of you. 
Your voice is surprisingly firm when you speak. "Let go," you command. And then, softer, "I need you."
Your words, your voice— it's in complete conflict with the situation you're currently in. And yet, it works. He lets out a sound, one that's somewhere between a growl and a whimper, his breath hot against your skin. And then he's moving and he's holding nothing back.
He's hard, brutal, and he's taking. His teeth on your shoulder; his breath against your neck; his nails digging into you.
It's a relentless, dizzying pace. Seungcheol bullies into your weeping cunt, fast and hard, and it draws out the most obscene sounds from you. Gasps, whines, an occasional scream when he hits a particularly sensitive spot. What has him seeing stars is the fact that you can't seem to settle on a name to moan. "Seung— Seungcheol— Cheol—"
Yes, you're saying, yes.
Seungcheol loses himself, utterly and completely, in you. You're on the edge, he can hear it; he can feel it, and God, he wants to hear you say his name. Every single one of them. 
It almost sounds like a mantra, your voice, as he takes and takes and takes, his breathing harsh, ragged.
You go through all of the names you have for him, breathless and wrecked, until you can't even say anything because his hips are snapping into you with a ferocity that's rare but not unwelcome. Your pornographic moans reverberate in your otherwise empty apartment, and Seungcheol thinks he might go insane. 
"'M close," you choke out. "Cheollie, baby, I'm— ah, fuck— Seung—"
His breath catches at your words, his eyes closing for a moment as he groans. You, you, in all your perfect, glorious, undone state. It’s a sight he wishes he could capture, freeze in time.
He lets out a whimper, his words almost slurred when he responds. "Love— I—"
He's never been this rough, never this intense. You're the only one, the only person he's ever let himself go like this with. The only person who he's ever let see everything, take everything.
He's on the edge, he's there, he's—
"C'mon," he whines, his voice barely above a whisper, his hand clenching hard around your hip. "With me, love, please."
It's a miracle that you can even nod, can even find your voice as Seungcheol keeps on going with his erratic, stuttering thrusts. "With you," you gasp. 
He snaps into you, then, and you arch up with a scream of his name. There’s the familiar white-hot flash of pleasure; the impossibly tight clench of your walls around him.
He stays buried in you for several long moments, his forehead resting against your shoulder, his breath coming in ragged gasps, his heart pounding so hard he can feel it in his ears. He has never felt so utterly spent in his entire life, never been so completely, utterly drained of energy. He's weak against you. He’s weak because of you. 
"God," he finally manages to mutter.
He lifts his head, just enough to be able to look at you, but he can't even muster a grin. He's spent and he knows you know that.
His hand comes up slightly, to brush the hair off of your forehead. "I think..." he says, his voice thick and hoarse, "I think I ruined you, love."
You let out a breathless laugh, one that you have to push out of your heaving chest. "You—" you try to say, but the words don't form, not at first. You take a few moments to take in some air, to gulp past the lump in your throat. "You're a fool."
His lips twitch into a tired but genuine smile at the sound of your laugh. It’s a soft sound that he's always thought sounds beautiful, especially coming from you.
A hoarse, broken laugh of his own escapes; his hand coming up to rest at your jawline, his thumb gently tracing over the warm skin there. He's still catching his breath, but he's slowly gathering himself.
"Am I a fool?" he asks quietly, leaning his forehead against yours. "What does that make you, then?"
You’re a fool, too, he thinks to himself. For letting me have this. 
Instead of answering him, you press a small kiss to the corner of his mouth. It’s the only answer he’s going to get from you for now, it seems. 
He lets out a soft huff, moving his head back just slightly, his eyes closing. "You're beautiful, you know that?" he says quietly, his voice still rough with fatigue.
"Every time," you respond. Your own voice is strained, almost tired, but there's a hint of amused exasperation. "You say that every time, Cheol."
His eyes opened once again to look at you.
"Because it's true," he says simply, his voice soft and sincere, the hand resting at your jaw moving to brush your hair back from your face. "It's always true, love."
He lets out a soft sigh, his eyes tracing over your face, taking in every inch of you. His eyes pause at your lips for a moment, his tongue gently wetting his own, his gaze finally moving back up to meet your eyes.
You thread your shaking fingers through the back of his hair and answer his unspoken question. "Kiss me soft and easy, Cheol," you whisper.
The moment the words leave your mouth, he's in action.
He leans forward without a second thought, the hand not buried in your hair going to rest on your hip, his lips meeting yours in a soft, gentle kiss.
There's no heat in it, no want or need. Just a soft press of his lips against yours, gentle and slow. 
It's languid and unhurried. Like there's nowhere either of you have to be after this. For a moment, you can pretend that this is normal— that Seungcheol will not have to leave, and that you’ll not have to change into new pajamas because he'd broken yours, and that you can be... well, something, anything aside from what you are now.
But it's wishful thinking, you both know, so all Seungcheol can do is kiss you. He lets out a soft sound, almost a sigh, as his tongue slides into your mouth, his hand on your hip tightening slightly. His other hand is in your hair still, his fingers gently tracing over your scalp, his body almost melting against yours.
He will have to leave. He always does. But for now, he's here, with you, and you feel perfect, and—
Five minutes, he bargains. Five more minutes.
And then things end, not really by your own accord.
The sharp, shrill sound of Seungcheol's phone ringing breaks through your haze. You pull away, a bit jolted at the foreign sound— at something other than your words, your breathing, reverberating in the room. It takes you a beat too long to realize someone is calling him— his phone in his discarded jeans— in the godawful middle of the night. 
He lets out a loud groan, the sound tired and drawn out, and he can't help but rest his forehead against your shoulder once again, letting out a resigned sigh.
"God, save me," he mutters, his voice rough. "What time is it?"
You chuckle lightly. "Go on," you urge softly, not because you want to but because you have to. "Answer."
Seungcheol lets out another loud, drawn out sigh, his shoulders slumping in obvious defeat. He reluctantly lifts his head from your shoulder with a grumble, but he can't quite stop himself from pressing a kiss to your cheek just before he shifts up and off of the couch.
Once he’s reached down to grab his phone from where it's stuffed in the pocket of his jeans, he answers without looking at the caller ID. "Yeah?"
"Hyung!"
It's Soonyoung— of course it's Soonyoung— calling.
"Are you still at the company?" the younger member asks. "I think I forgot my headset in one of the practice rooms, and Minghao said you didn't go home with them."
"It's midnight, Soonyoung." 
You shit over on the couch, careful not to make any sound. Not to give Soonyoung any suspicion that Seungcheol might be somewhere where he shouldn't be. You press a small, reassuring kiss to Seungcheol's hip as Soonyoung goes on to whine, "Yeah, yeah, I know. But it's the expensive headset, hyung. If you're still there, could you check? Please?"
Seungcheol lets out a huff— a mixture of resigned affection and irritation— at the feeling of your lips against his skin. He can feel the exhaustion deep within his bones now, and all he wants to do is go back to snuggling into you for the night.
But he can't say no to Soonyoung, especially not at this time of night.
"Fine," he grumbles, letting out a huff. "Which practice room?"
You can hear the moment Soonyoung practically brightens with triumph.
"Third floor!" he says happily, and you bury your face into Seungcheol's side to keep yourself from laughing. "You're the best, hyung! I'll buy you a meal tomorrow for the trouble!"
He reaches down with the hand not holding his phone, pressing his palm to the top of your head, pushing lightly down. A warning of don't laugh. "Just be thankful I'm your hyung, kid," Seungcheol grouses.
Soonyoung ends the call soon enough, saying some things about sending Seungcheol a photo of his headset so he knows exactly which one is missing. When it's back to just the two of you again, you tilt your head up to look at Seungcheol. 
"You're really going back for it tonight?" you ask, even though you already know the answer. 
The corner of his lip twitches into a half smile at the way you look up at him. His eyes takein the sight of you— his hand on the back of your head, his fingers gently twisting strands of your hair.
"Of course I am," he sighs. "I can't say no to him, love."
You shift upward so you can sit side by side with Seungcheol. Both of you have yet to put on any clothes, but you’ve at least gathered your bearings enough to form coherent words now.
"You can't say 'no' to any of them," you tease as you press a gentle kiss to his cheek. There's an almost blinding affection in your tone as you say, "You and your goddamn boys."
Seungcheol reaches out, wrapping an arm around your waist to tug you closer to him. Briefly, he presses his lips against your hair. His eyes are almost tender as he speaks.
"They're my boys," he says, his voice soft.
You let the words hang there for just a moment. It’s an admission, one that both of you have known for the longest time, but it's also a reminder. It’s the reason why you and Seungcheol can never be more than this—because he has his boys, and he would never do anything to jeopardize them.
You press your face against the column of his neck for just one more precious moment. You’ve never been selfish about Seungcheol, but there were nights when you thought about it. Just… thought about it.
The thought never wins.
"Let’s clean up, get dressed," you whisper into his skin. "So you can head to the company sooner."
He lets out a soft, almost painful exhale. He knows what you're thinking, what you're feeling; he's thought about it himself, as well. He hates having to leave you, hates having to say that he has to leave you. But his boys are his boys, and one day all this will be over, and then...
He can't think about it right now, though.
Instead, he nods, pressing a light kiss to your temple. "Yeah."
It takes about ten minutes or so for you both to gather everything together. Seungcheol still looks tired, though for different reasons now. He’s essentially traded one exhaustion for another.
As he puts on the shoes he left in your entryway, you lean against your doorway with your arms crossed over your chest. "I’ll be holding you accountable for my pajama set," you warn him. "And for tomorrow’s noise complaint."
"Yeah, yeah," he huffs, taking a step toward you. "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten."
His face softens as he reaches you, his hands coming up to grab your elbows, gently pulling you closer to him. "Sorry," he says. "Again."
 "You’re not sorry, " you sigh pointedly, more out of spite than anything. It’s the truth—he’s not really that apologetic about losing control every now and then, about your neighbors knowing you’re being pulled close every so often.
When you bury your face into his chest, he lets out a low, gruff chuckle, his chin resting gently against the top of your head. His arms wrap around you, holding you tightly against him, just like every single time before.
"You’re right," he murmurs. A quiet, affectionate admission. “Not sorry. Not even a little.”
He holds you there against him, his eyes fluttering shut as he allows himself just a few more moments before he has to leave. You both stay there, allowing yourselves that moment, until the tension in Seungcheol’s shoulders fades and your annoyance at your torn pajamas ebbs. It could’ve been five minutes, maybe less, but then Seungcheol’s phone pings with a text—surely Soonyoung asking if he’s found his headset.
You’re the one who takes the step back, putting some distance between you. "Drive safe," you tell Seungcheol. "Text me when you’re there."
Resigned. That’s the only way to describe the smile that tugs at his lips. "Yeah," he says. "I will."
True to his word, Seungcheol does indeed send you a text about an hour or so after he'd arrived at the company, informing you that he was there and had found Soonyoung’s headset.
He's still exhausted, and all he wants is to be back. Back inside of you, back with you. But he can't do any of that. At least, not right now. Not at this point.
I miss you already, is the only other thing he adds to his text.
Your text comes in only moments later, like you had been waiting by your phone. 
you're a fool. head home. take care.
A soft sigh escapes him the moment he reads your text, his eyes flickering over the words you'd typed, the harshness of it. It's another layer of protection for the both of you, but it's still not easy to read.
He's about to respond with something snarky, some light-hearted joke to tease you a bit, but he stops himself at the last moment. He knows that you're right.
He needs to head home. He needs to take care.
And he’s an absolute goddamn fool, in more ways than one. 
1K notes · View notes
arcaneauthor · 8 months ago
Text
Skz reacting to you kissing them in front of the other members
Warnings: um some kissing ig? Nothing else really
Tags: established relationships, kissing, so much fluff, seungmin being a little menace like always, I think that’s it
A/n: have this while you wait for my long hyunjin one shot! Also I just started writing skz and don’t fully know how to write their personalities yet so pls be kind🙏
────୨ৎ────
Chan:
Tumblr media
I kinda feel like this would be a normal thing for y’all?
Like you would frequently come by the studio while skz is recording to visit him
And you’d always end up giving him a little hello and goodbye kiss
It was always just a peck but you’d think you two were full on groping each other by the way the members start gagging and groaning
They honestly should be used to it by now but they just can’t help but tease their dad leader
Mainly seungmin
“Ew you like kissing old men?”
But Chan’s used to it by now and just rolls his eyes and focuses back on his work
But he can’t hide the smile on his face
He kinda likes when the members tease him, it really makes them feel like family
Minho:
Tumblr media
Would definitely turn it into a spectacle
Ik he doesn’t normally like skin ship from the other member that much so many people think he wouldn’t like pda from the reader but I think it’d be quite the opposite
Like I feel like he’d be the type that would grab you and pull you in closer when you try to just give him a peck in the dorm
Like we’re talking turning it into a full on make out session
And he’s fully aware the members are there, that’s partly why he does it
He thinks it’s kinda funny to get a reaction out of them
I feel like there’d be a mix array of both groaning an wolf whistling from the others
Either way he’d just throw a middle finger to the members over his shoulder as he smirks into the kiss
Changbin:
Tumblr media
I actually kinda feel like changbin would be a little embarrassed
Like at first he’d kinda forget the other members are there and kinda get into it
And then when he’d hear the reaction from the members he’d pull away with a little blush on his cheeks
Would have that cute little embarrassed smile that he does as he lowers his head a little as he murmurs a “shut up” to the members
(If you’re a stay I feel like you definitely know which smile I’m talking about)
Would totally never admit to anybody that he was blushing
Like the other members maybe Chan would tease him like “aw binnies embarrassed”
And changbin being his loud self would be like “HUH? YOU THINK ID GET EMBARRASSED OVER SOMETHING LIKE THIS?”
Like my mind immediately went to that men in colorful pants vlive he did with Chan and Han when he was yelling at chan for calling him out on rapping his line too fast and he was like “YOU THINK I RAPPED FAST CAUSE I WAS NERVOUS?” Lol
Just imagine him saying it like that if you’ve seen that live
Jisung:
Tumblr media
This man would be SHOOK
Like I’m talking about pulling away like he’s been BURNED
Quokka cheeks are flaming red
Why do I almost feel like this man would let out a surprised yelp as if you’ve just attacked him lmao
Looks between you and the members with wide eyes like “did that really just happen?”
unlike with the others I feel like the members wouldn’t make teasing comments towards you guys
They’d just be on the floor ROLLING at Han for getting so flustered
And even though you were the cause of it he’d still hide his face behind you to escape his embarrassment
Hyunjin:
Tumblr media
Feel like he wouldn’t get too into the kiss knowing the others are there
But also would definitely lean into you a bit
For some reason I just feel like hyunjin would be an amazing kisser
I mean have you seen those luscious lips??
Anyways that’s a story for another fic lol I’m getting distracted
like Chan I’d feel like he’d get his sassy eye roll going on when the members made a comment
With how much it seems that hyunjin and seungmin play around with each other seungmin would definitely tease the shit out of him
And hyunjin would give him that signature bombastic side eye
I feel like seungmin would keep it going to the point of hyunjin just eventually standing up to literally pounce on him
Seungmin would just be laughing like a maniac the whole time
Felix:
Tumblr media
I actually feel like Felix wouldn’t be as embarrassed as you’d think
Like Ik he’s a smol bean but down deep I feel like Felix is actually pretty confident
Not in a cocky way but like he’s sure of himself yk?
Like I feel like he’d just smile into it
Turns it into a bit of a longer but still soft and sweet kiss
Just completely ignoring the noises from the members in the background
Like I think he’d just be in his own little world with you
After y’all pull away he just pulls you to sit facing forward on his lap and hugs you from behind
Has THE brightest smile on his face as he does it
Seungmin:
Tumblr media
I kinda feel like seungmin wouldn’t like you giving him pda
Not like to the point of getting angry or anything
But I kinda feel like he’d pull an “ew” face lol
(And I don’t mean this as being bad or anything, I myself don’t really love pda so I get it lol)
But you probably do it to just playfully annoy him
Which is why you’d probably be giggling with the members at him
“I hate you guys” but he’d say it with a smile on his face so you knew he wasn’t actually upset about it
He’d probably give you a long kiss later in his room to make up for it
Jeongin:
Tumblr media
He wouldn’t go as far as to immediately yank away like jisung
But he’d definitely be a shy baby
Ik he looks all grown up and stuff these days but I feel like little baby bread is still under there somewhere lol
Like his eyes would widen mid kiss when he really processes that you’re kissing him in front of everyone
The members wouldn’t so much as tease him like with the others as they would moan and groan about seeing their little maknae doing “adult stuff” lol
Poor thing would definitely turn red, covering his face with his hands as he sunk down
Would honestly be wishing the couch would just swallow him up
Probably wouldn’t make eye contact with you for the rest of the night because he’d just start immediately blushing lol
Also would probably keep his distance cause anytime your hands so much as touched the members would tease him about y’all making sure you weren’t “moving too fast”
End notes: well I officially finished this at 5am lmao. Guess I better head to bed🫡
2K notes · View notes
shotmrmiller · 1 year ago
Text
need simon to be retired and living in the middle of nowhere with a car-fixing hobby, and you're pulling into his 'shop' because you were road-tripping across the country and now some funky noises are happening underneath the hood.
you tentatively walk towards the open garage, only to spot him under some run-down vehicle that has more rust than sun-faded paint, deflated tires, and a license plate that's also got rust gnawing at the edges, the numbers on it barely discernable.
you rap your knuckles gently on the weathered car, and the wheels of the creeper he's on squeak in protest under him as he rolls out to look at you, filthy gloves smearing the dust on his brow instead of wiping it away.
"err, hi. uh, i was pointed this way by some lovely folk that work in that diner down the way, and they said that you could take a look at my car."
he rises smoothly, even though his joints pop as he does, dark eyes squinting against the sun. he towers over you with broad shoulders and thick arms. a tough-as-teak country man.
you start when he speaks, deep voice echoing off of dusty walls. "they said tha', did they?" he lifts the hem of his grease-stained wife beater to wipe at the beads of sweat on his forehead, and your gaze involuntarily wanders to the thick trail of coarse, dark hair under his navel.
"what's wrong with it?"
if you knew that, you wouldn't be here, blatantly ogling him in some decrepit workshop located in a sleepy corner of the countryside. "i don't know. it's making some scary popping noises and figured that it needed to be looked at, asap."
your grimace is involuntary when he extends an oil-streaked gloved hand. you really hope he's not expecting you to-
"keys."
right. you wordlessly hand them over and walk a few steps behind him as he heads toward the front of your car. "did ya get it looked at before your trip?"
you want to snap at him, that obviously you did. you may not be some car wizard, however, you can do the bare minimum for it but he's your only hope for getting the hell out of here, so you press your tongue against the back of your teeth for a moment before answering.
"yes. i did prepare for it. got new tires, an oil change, and anything else it may have needed."
he hums at your answer, a low sound in the back of his throat, and curls his fingers under the hood and begins to feel for the release. your mind is in the gutter as your eyes linger on his sun-kissed skin, watching the tendons on his inked forearm ripple with each movement.
your mind is snapped back to reality when he mutters, "i hope ya don't think i'm doin' this for free."
"wouldn't dream of it. you don't seem the charitable type."
the latch yields under his fingertips, and the hood springs open. "i'd say i'm pretty charitable, considerin' i'm even helpin' ya with this."
your eyebrows furrow, corners of your lips pulling downward. "what, were you closed or something?"
he gives you a small smirk while his hand searches for the prop rod inside the engine bay. "do i look like a business, sweetheart?"
embarrassment burns your cheeks, and your mouth gapes unprettily as you turn around to truly take in the place. past the grease-smeared floors, there's rust blooming on the only workbench in the garage, a single red toolbox resting on the ground. there's a car jack tossed in a corner, a vibrant blue cooler by the door, and a few firearms on pegboard shelves. it looks like a simple garage. a personal one.
"oh my god," you stammer, "i'm so sorry, i just- the townsfolk, they led me to believe that you're a mechanic." how bloody mortifying.
he ducks his head under the hood, bending at the waist to lean over the engine, eyes swiftly scanning the machinery. "it's a hobby. i fix my own vehicles... and now yours, i reckon."
eventually, he turns the car on and listens to the engine roar to life before it begins to pop, standing over the open hood with thinned lips and furrowed brows.
he tells you that he can fix it, it'll just take a bit for the part to get here, obviously, so he recommends staying at a rented cabin in town for a few days— maybe even a week— and he'll give you a ride over.
he gets you there in no time, unsurprising because he drove the motorcycle far too fast— illegal, really. he helps you off the bike, your clammy hand in his much bigger, roughened one.
you rip off his helmet, pushing it into his barrel chest. "please never drive me around that fast again." he gives you a couple of pats to the shoulder, chuckling under his breath.
"unless you're plannin' on walkin' to get your car back, i can't promise tha'."
grrrreat.
(the issue was the serpentine belt, it was slightly frayed but the man kept you around for 2.5 weeks under the excuse of something taking too long, or the car being under worse condition. maybe he charges you a kidney for fixing it, and since you can't obviously pay that ridiculous amt of money, he tells you to go on a date with him. gross. or maybe he's a sane man and he just sends you on your way in 2 days time. idk. installs a gps in your car? keepin' tabs on ya cuz he plans on passing by wherever you live by complete coincidence.)
2K notes · View notes
thanosscross · 2 months ago
Text
Fake girlfriend, Fake boyfriend, silly! - Choi Seung Hyun/T.O.P x reader
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Summary: After your manager plotted a fake relationship between his two biggest signed rappers, you and Seung get very close, as best friends, but tell me this...would friends treat friends like how Seung Hyun treats you?
Warnings: None :)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Whenever you were first asked by your manager to start a fake relationship with a guy from one of his boy groups you were complexed, Not recognizing any K-pop idol named Seung Hyun. The first time met him was out at a meeting with your shared boss, Seung Hyun was secretly excited about meeting you, while he found it irritating that his boss felt the need to fake a girlfriend for him, he liked the idea of having someone as cool as you around.
"Seung Hyun, this is Y/n, she's going to your show girl, Y/n, this is Seung Hyun, also known as T.o.p, he'll be your show boy" You manager stated, after that you two became close, using the excuse of having to make it believable to spend almost every minute you could with each other. While you were close with all of BigBang, you and Seung Hyun just clicked together, often sharing a hotel room whenever you'd tour with him for your collaborated shows or songs. It didn't take long after the announcement of your fake relationship for people to immediately either hate or love it, you weren't a rapper like your fake boyfriend, but you did rap in some of your songs, even having a few verses with him where you rapped together, but your manager liked to utilize your voice more, liking the way it wasn't too high pitched but still feminine and calming. You had been 'together' now for almost a year, getting ready for your first full tour with BigBang, you were nervous but also excited, this was big for you, hopefully.
Waking up in your hotel bed you groaned, stretching your body as much as you could before slowly crawling out of your bed before slipping on one of Seung Hyun's hoodies, you weren't sure what time it was, but the sun wasn't up yet, so you knew it was sometime in the middle of the night. You attempted to fall back asleep, but everything was making you uncomfortable, the airport lost your luggage, so nothing in the room made you feel like home, no pillow, blanket, nothing, just the smell of the half ass detergent the hotel used to wash the linens, standing up for the second time you slowly made you way to the connecting you, knowing beyond the door all four guys were most likely asleep, you contemplated on going on, not wanting to risk waking anybody up, but right as you started to turn around Seung Hyun's words echoed in your head 'Don't worry about some silly pillow, if you need something that reminds you of back home, we're all a door away' Turning to face the door again you slowly twisted the knob, watching as it slowly opened into their dark room, all the lights were off and from the faint glow from your bathroom light you could faintly see where everybody was. Ji-Yong and Seung Hyun shared a bed, and Dae-Sung and Tae-Yang shared the other. You pressed Seung Hyun's hoodie to your lips slowly making your way over to whom you hoped to be your fake boyfriend and best friend "Seung hyun" You whispered, feeling your anxiety start to creep up inside of you as he turned his back to you, forcing Ji-yong to stir as well. It wasn't that you were scared or scared of the dark, but ever since you were a teenager you would have severe anxiety in the dark if you sat too long, so standing in the basically pitch-black room wasn't helping your anxiety with not wanting to wake anybody or being in a new weird place.
Trying to stifle your whimpered you felt your hands start to shake as you tried to wake your friend up again "Seung Hyun please...I really need you" You whimpered quietly, instead of your intended target, Ji-Yong slowly sat up, turning his head around confused letting his eyes focus on you "What's up, y/n? Are you okay?" He asked, you bit your lip, trying to swallow the lump in your throat in your throat, sitting up more due to your silence, Ji-yong grabbed his cell phone using the screen brightness to see your face. Seeing your upset state he frowned, catching on to what you were trying to do, he tried to help you, and eventually after about five more minutes, you finally woke Seung Hyun up. As he woke up he shot you both a nasty glare, not wiping it off of his face until his eyes focused and he saw your shaking frame slightly in the dark, without saying anything Seung Hyun just motioned for you to go back to your bed, following behind you with his pillow under his arm. "I-I'm sorry" You whimpered, holding onto the cuffs of the hoodie sleeves, trying any way possible to calm your raging anxiety "Don't. Just lay down, dalkomi" He whispered tiredly, as he pulled the blanket back for you, for a moment you thought he was going to go back to his bed, but instead he just shut the connecting door before laying down next to you "Don't steal all of the blankets again" He warned before wrapping his arm around you pulling you close to where your head laid on his chest, his fingers caressing your spine as you rested your hand on his chest, the more he moved his hand on your back the more you could feel the anxiety slipping away and the tiredness starting to slip in. It didn't take long before Seung Hyun felt your slow relaxed breaths, and the way your hand barely rested on his chest anymore.
You both woke up with a startle, your bandmates standing in your room cooing with their phones out "Sooo cute!" Dae-sung cheered as Seung Hyun groaned slamming his head under the pillow, you just shot them all a tired confused look "Come on Lovers! We have an hour until rehearsals!" Tae-yang reminded as he placed two coffees down on the table, before ushering the others out. Tiredly you turned to look at Seung Hyun who was still hiding under the pillow, you absent-mindedly traced your nails up his back "Aein...handsome, come on" You called sweetly, it wasn't odd for you to call each other pet names, you were actually quite flirty with each other even outside of pretending to be together, you weren't sure about Seung Hyun, but you just liked the way you clicked with him, and you liked the way he'd blush anytime you'd call him into another room by calling him Aein. You watched as he slowly lifted his head "Do we have to?..I'm comfortable" He complained, you just laughed offering him a sympathetic smile as you patted his back "Yep, we have to, now come on, handsome" You replied before climbing off of the bed going towards the large costume bag your manager had dropped off earlier "ooo We're going to look hot, Aein" You cooed as you opened the black bag, seeing the deep red fabrics of a suit and dress, on top of other things, giggling as every outfit was coordinated together, Seung Hyun moved to where you stood smiling "You're going to look amazing" He agreed, you blushed slightly as you pulled out your first outfits, handing the suit to Seung Hyun before you disappeared into the bathroom. After a few moments you both called out "Aein?.." "Dalkomi?" Giggling you opened the bathroom door stepping out "Zip me up?" You asked playfully, he walked over, carefully placing his hands above your waist to hold the fabric of the dress, zipping the zipper up and clasping the small latch he smiled "Tie this damn thing for me?" Seung Hyun asked, playfully pouting as he motioned to the black tie "Of course, handsome" You teased tying the tie effortlessly. As you pulled away you both stopped, staring into each other's eyes before hesitantly pulling away, what was that?
As the show started you stood in the center of the boys, the smoke machines layering a thick smoke over the floor of the stage, as you all dispersed you waited for your cue to start singing. You were having fun, completely forgetting all about your moment with Seung Hyun until Fantastic Baby, you had sat down more to the back of the stage to watch considering you weren't singing and weren't required to preform currently, As soon as Seung Hyun started his first verse he made his way to you pulling you to your feet as he rapped, bringing you close to him before finishing, nodding his head along to Ji-Yong, smiling as he followed to chorography facing you, you just laughed at him starting to mimic his movements, he brought the microphone close to his mouth cheering into the mic before moving back to the center of the stage to continue his second verse.
After the song came to an end you smirked hearing you voice layover theirs, the song transitioning into one of your favorites of yours. As you rapped along to it you took notice of Seung Hyun nodding his head along to your words, throwing some of his own chorography in, Seung Hyun rushed over to you, spinning you around before shaking his hips as he jumped around you, obviously having fun with his free time. As the song ended you panting attempting to catch your breath, Ji-yong circling the stage talking to the crowd as you regrouped with Seung Hyun and the others "Fuck it is next, ready for it?" Tae-yang asked, knowing that was the song that required the most interaction and movement between you and Seung Hyun other than Bae Bae and your back dancing with Seung Hyun for Zutter. "I'm already so tired" You mumbled as the track started to play, Seung Hyun just smiled, kissing your cheek as he rushed past, grouping with the guys for the beginning of the song. Other than your small verse towards the end, your main focus during this song was moving with Seung Hyun and the boys, basically bouncing between them all as a long interest.
Whenever the boys preformed If you, you used your opportunity to take a break, sitting down and taking a drink of your water you smiled in awe. You never heard Seung Hyun actually sing often, but you always loved it, you thought it sounded exactly how you manager described your voice. Whenever Zutter came on came on you were proud of yourself, hitting every move and mark perfectly with the music, and even whenever you'd throw you own little moves in with Seung Hyun, he still always knew what to do somehow, you watched as he pointed at you while rapping, you just rolled your eyes as you danced, giggling whenever you felt Seung Hyun press his hips against yours from behind, bouncing his hips with the beat of the music, your face immediately broke out in a blush as you smacked his chest in shock.
Whenever it came to your last song you purposely saved the most sexual and vulgar for last, you liked the chorography a lot, liking how confident it made you feel as you slid on to your knees at the end of the stage, bouncing on your knees for a moment as you sang, letting yourself slowly fall back you slid back arching your back away from the cold stage surface, silently thanking the spandex shorts under your dress, your head arched just enough to see Seun Hyun running his hands up his body and neck, mimicking your song from his spot at the far with the other boys. As the song ended you stayed were you were, waiting a moment for Seung Hyun to make his way helping you to your feet "That move was new" He stated on your walk back "You think the boss is going to like it?" He teased, you just rolled your eyes "I don't care, I did it for you, Aein" You smiled teasingly watching his face go red, as you all made your way to the end of the stage you smiled, standing on your mark on the platform waiting for the boys to reach theirs before you posed, you immediately kneeled down, using your hands to stabilize yourself Seung Hyun moved forward, pressing his fingers to your cheeks for you, causing you to giggle as the bass to Fantastic Baby played one last time before you all made your way towards the exit of the stage. As you approached the mark you slowed down, blushing brightly whenever Seung Hyun's hand quickly touched your ass, you turned around pretending to storm off stage, Seung Hyun looked towards the ground one last time before winking and running after you.
As you got off stage you were a blushing mess, Seung Hyun quick to find you, a bright smile on his face "I knew you'd be amazing! That's why you're T.O.P Best friend" He said proudly, never noticing your face falling as he called out your real title.
Right..Best friend
---
Ooo we love a slow burn with a fake relationship concept PLUS a clueless but cocky Choi Seung Hyun AND the rest of the band loving you? I dunno about you lovelies, but this gal likes a lot.
--
Taglist!!
@ag022123
@acehasmyheart
@heartz4rubyy
417 notes · View notes
muntitled · 9 months ago
Text
Broken Telephones
Tumblr media
Ex!Jake x Fem!Reader | Jay x Fem!Reader
Summary: Despite Jay priding himself on being a good friend, he's done denying himself what belongs to him.
Warnings: Language, Obsession, Jealousy, toxicity, Ex Boyfriend's Best Friend to Lovers, Smut +18 (mdni), Squirting, Manhandling Ownership kink, Semi-Public Sex, Exhibitionist Kink, Dubious Consent, Angry Sex, Threats, Dom/Sub Themes, Hard Dom!Jay
Based on this request by @penny44224 . This gets really toxic, sorry, also I couldn't leave my baby Jake out of this, hope you like it <3
Tumblr media
“What kind of party is this anyway?” You grumble from the passenger seat, your heart sinking behind the glittery confines of your tight collared shirt. Something so tight and so painfully provocative would never have come out of your own closet. You had Jake and his obscene budget to thank for that.
“The normal kind,” he says, “with drinking and sex and smoke-” before he's allowed to continue his blissful rambling, you interrupt Jake with a raise of your hand.
“Need I remind you that I have asthma?” With a firm hand on the steering wheel, Jake's eyes roll into the back of his head.
“I can't go.” You continue, “That's a health risk.”
“You haven't had an asthma attack since you were 6,” he deadpans, “Do not piss me off,”
It was difficult to do much of anything with a pounding heart and a stomach flooded with molten anxiety. What do people do at parties anyway? You've watched enough low budget teen Netflix dramas to know… nothing good.
"I don't think you understand the words leaving my mouth," The dwindling daylight leaves your bones rattling with anxiety. You were supposed to be watching the sun setting over the river skyline from your dorm room. Your notes on autocracy in a Constitutional Monarchy, pending across the page in front of you, ready for submission Monday morning.
Instead, you find yourself arrested in a leather seat, in a shameless chequered miniskirt. Your exposed thighs are sticky with evening humidity. This is not how your evening was supposed to go.
"I need to be studying-"
You're battling fiercely with a Mr Morale tune oozing through the Jeep's speakers while your best friend remains blissfully unaware, rapping along as if your concerns were null and void.
Kendrick's voice was strong but yours was stronger. "Since I am an unwilling participant, this is technically kidnapping. You are illegally kidnapping me this very second. You are aware of that, yes?"
"Nonsense,” Jake chuckles, “I can't kidnap my ex girlfriend-” before you're able to rebut he quickly adds, “And I am aware that you're going to wake up one day realising your stupid ass wasted your college years studying." Jake shoots back while the chorus sails on without him. This was serious business if he took the time to ignore Kendrick's second verse. "I'm aware that in all our time in school you've done nothing but school. I'm also aware that I'm saving you from a life of complete and utter regret.” His big brown eyes narrow in the dark, and you are corralled into a shameful silence.
“Just don't try to sleep with me tonight-” you grumble under your breath.
“I'm a changed man,” he says, “I've only thought about fucking you only once this whole evening!”
“Oh god…” you shake your head slowly as the jeep assumes a safer speed in a residential enclosure. “These are rich people's palm trees, why am I seeing rich people's palm trees?"
"Because I got invited to an event that classifies the attendance of rich-people-palm-trees." His stoney visage cracks into a lazy, triumphant smirk.
“Rugby team.” Is all he says.
Your hand flies to the door handle, for what purpose specifically, remains an utter mystery. The car is still in motion so you did not have the intention of flinging the door open and hurling your body onto the biting tar underneath.
"Stop being so goddamn anxious all the time-”
“Jake, I don't even like Rugby-”
“No but you like me… and I like rugby… ergo…,” the car slows to a nauseating stop in the middle of a packed driveway.
"Let me rephrase that- Jake your friends hate me-"
"If this is about Jay again..."
"He's never liked me!" You huff, "Even when we were dating it's like he had it out for me or something!" Your shoulders are tense and Jake can't help but send a worried glance over. He ventures to lay his one hand on your thigh but stops himself, placing it instead on shoulder to rub out the knots there.
"You're making excuses. Jay hates everyone," he says, “I need you to forget about school for one night.” Jake's pep talk only succeeds in filling the void of your stomach with even more dread. “You think about dead politicians way too much for a 20 year old girl."
And that's how you end up in the backyard of a frat house as the third accessory of Jake and some unnamed girl. He has his arms wrapped around both your necks as he enters the party, like some glorified university replica of Hefner.
You know in this light, you appeared to be one of his girls, but the thought of weathering this party without Jake on standby filled you with unmistakable dread.
It was as if the soles of your feet were melting into the grass with each step you took towards the bonfire, even more so when you saw him already seated at the edge of a log, watching you approach with a smile that eases into an unimpressed frown. Jay's cup is held in mid-air as he watches you plop down beside him.
A single gold chain is tucked away behind a loose button up and suddenly, you wish to burrow into the ground underneath this log, away from the vulnerability of his gaze. You felt naked.
“You're not drinking.” Jongseong observes, glancing away from you and Jake's hand sliding over your hip bone.
“What’s in it?” You ask, eyes drifting over Jay's solo cup.
“Sugar, spice and everything nice,” he whispers back.
Beside you, Jake entertains the rest of his friends, his fingers rubbing unconsciously into your sides.
You don't seem at all impressed.
“What do you want me to say?” He asks with a slight deadpan, “That I put my love and affection into it? You're at frat house. This is probably 90% alcohol-”
“-And 10% mysterious drugs to roofie unsuspecting girls.” You conclude before making an elaborate show of pushing further into Jake's side. Jay doesn't like that one bit.
“If I wanted you to sleep with me,” his lips tickle your ear and you shiver, “I wouldn't need to get you high out of your mind to do it.”
Something in his words sounded vaguely like a promise.
“You'll just fall in line,” Jay said, “Like all the others.”
Before Jay could get another mind numbing word out, you're quickly standing from your post from beside Jake. “Coming here was a mistake. I'm Heading Home,”
Jake's hand tugs at yours as if prompting you to sit back down.
"Not after the game… C'mon, it'll be fun," you let Jake's words anchor you to the floor.
"Actually, Jake," Even under the moonlight you can spot a deep frown setting across his face, "I think I should go home. I've already had way too much to drink,"
"You've had 1 cup, my dear-”
"And a half," you clarify before shaking your head. ‘and your frjend is making me really fucking uncomfortable,’ you choose to leave those unspoken words unspoken.
You play with the string along the seam of your skirt, humming along to the Drake tune oozing out of the unseen speakers.
“Aww, you really don't wanna join our game?” Jay coos, looking up at you with an incriminating smirk as he clutches his heart as if you hurt him deeply.
“I'll pass.”
“Course you will,” he snickers. “Princess can't bear to stay away from her book too long, can she?’ It's that tone, that fucking that has you lowering
“What…” you swallow thickly, “What game?” you find yourself asking with a dignified huff as you plant your butt on the log in Between Jake and Jay once more. Your bones are rattling with unprocessed rage as Jake whispers, “broken telephone,”
He snickers, “just try to be as quiet as possible,- never thought I'd be saying those words to you of all people-” you sit at Jake's arm as the game begins with the first message travelling from Jungwon to Jungwon’s date. Unbeknownst to you, Jay has been zeroed in on your conversation with Jake all evening-his blood simmering at the sound of you and Jake whispering sweet nothings to each other like people who were still very much lovers.
His jaw clenched as he plants his steepled elbow on his knees, his hands hanging lazily in front of him as he tries to focus on playing the game and not the giggles exchanged between you and your supposed ex boyfriend.
Sunoo finally passes the message into Jay's right ear, a very clear and resounding- ‘there is nothing satanic about pineapple on pizza’- Jungwon’s attempt at absolution from an argument they had weeks ago. But instead of carrying this specific message over into your ear, subsequently bringing the game to a victorious end, he stops midway, watching your laugh aimed at the blackened night sky while Jake looks up at you with that expression that was very much not supposed to be reserved for ex's.
Jay decides to throw the game.
“Your turn,” Jay's voice is dripping in monotony, as if he couldn't be bothered to even talk to you, let alone play this game with you.
Your mouth falls open when he slithers his hand to the back of your neck, leading your head to his slightly parted lips until said lips are tickling your ear lobe. Your heart is sinking into the confines of your stomach and for the briefest moment, you fear the world might have stopped spinning as Jongseong carries his next words in your ear. Game be damned.
“First floor. Third door on the left.” His hand is still planted on the back of your neck as he whispers those words at you and you're immediately struck with the severity in his tone.
You weren't an idiot.
In fact you'd like to consider yourself quite smart.
You knew that whatever Jay confessed - or rather implied - was definitely not the contents of Jungwon’s intended message. A broken telephone indeed.
Still, coiling in your stomach is a confusing web of wired tension that needs to be snapped. All night, your banter with Jongseong had been laced with something far more frustrating, something you needed to get out of your system.
“U-Um I need to go to the bathroom-” you don't know why you're following his orders. You don't know why you're walking steadily towards what you know very well was probably Jongseong's room in the frat house- a lamb to the proverbial slaughter. All you know is that your heart speeds up just a little quicker when you hear him excusing himself from the group right behind you with; “I'm going for a smoke.”
Your mind is hazy with not only fear, but insane unmistakable lust as you make your way up the stairs, surfing between bodies as you make it onto the first floor landing. You can feel Jongseong's oppressive presence behind you. You can feel how anxious he is to get you alone.
And when you enter his room, there is almost no time to regret following orders because he has you pinned against the closed door. The sound of the party is muffled outside but all you're concerned with is Jongseong's palm cradling your throat, his hooded eyes holding something so incredibly angry within.
“What the fuck do I have to do to make you forget him?” His voice cracks as he mumbles drunkenly. You'd never seen someone as put together as Jay, appear so wayward, so driven by inhibitions.
His palm slithers tighter around your neck, too late for your brain to process that you need his hands off.
“You've been taunting me the whole night.”
“Jongseong, I don't know what-”
Your words bleed into a yelp as he pulls you in by the neck to connect your lips in a steering and sloppy kiss.
Once he gets even a tiny taste, all inhibitions are thrown out the window. Jongseong's cock hardens in his pants and he's utterly delicious with lust.
“You're such a slut, you know that?” He mumbles drunkenly, words meshing together, “Might as well have walked in with his fucking collar around your throat like he owned you-”
“Jongseong-” a gasp cracks your throat when Jay forces his hand underneath your skirt, immediately cupping your sex until you are arching your back against the door.
“Oh- fuck- Jongseong-”
A snicker slips from his alcohol stained lips as Jongseong drags you from the door to his window, overlooking the backyard.
“You want him to see what a slut you are for me?” Your tits press against the glass as Jongseong looms behind you, sliding your panties to the side before dipping his fingers into your soaked folds.
“I didn't-”
What you wanted to say before the weight of chasing your own lust overpowered your senses, is that you didn't know just how deep Jongseong's infatuation ran. You didn't even know he likes you.
“All he needs to do is turn around and look up, and he'll see you fucking yourself on my hand-” Jay's other hand reaches over to pull down your top, putting your breasts on absolute display. You're moaning wantonly into the air as you push yourself back into Jay's hand fucking into you and you feel like crying real tears.
“You're fucking soaked. Is that for me or for him?”
“Jongseong I'm gonna-” you're squirting all over his hand, your ass pressed against his front before the rest of the words could even leave your lips. Jongseong is utterly mystified by the sight of you arching backwards against him, body writhing as you come undone right there by his window.
“Fuck,” his voice cracks again, he's utterly pained. “You're gonna do that again, but on my cock this time-”
“Jongseong-” you barely made it a whisper before he's flinging you onto his bed. The springs creek underneath your back as he pulls you by the hips to the edge, manhandling you as if you were nothing but property.
“I saw you first, you know that, right?” Jay mumbles to himself as he drags his pants down to pull his aching cock out. “I saw you first and Jake-” he spits on his hand, jerking his cock above you, “That fucker knew I wanted you first but he hit on you anyway-” Before he can continue in anger, a low groan leaves his throat. “Fuck baby, open your legs just like that-” they snap open on command, you're not sure you're able to deny him anything in this state. And what a state it is: braids hanging around you like a halo, your shirt, a mess with your tits hanging out, all while Jay swipes your panties away to make way for his cock already leaking precum. It's like he didn't have time at all to undress you. He needed to be inside you so fucking badly.
“I'm gonna cum inside, I hope you know-” Jay's eyes roll back into his head as he eases his cock in, one hand pressed on the bed at the side of your head as he hovers over you, “You're squeezing my cock, for fuck's sake-” he ruts into you, creating a burst of friction that has your stomach coiling again-”
“Jongseong- baby-”
“Fucking Christ, don't call me that or I'm gonna cum-” he's soon fucking into you with the urgency and frustration that has been building since you and Jake announced your relationship.
It inked his veins and seeped into his habits, whereby he'd crane his neck back in every econ class, just to get a look at you in 10 minute intervals. He loved you and you just refused to see it.
Having you underneath him now, tits bouncing while he fucked you on his bed- it was all proving too much for Jongseong and you moan at the feeling of his cock twitching inside you.
“I'm gonna cum- fuck you're such a slut-”
He squishes your cheeks together, in a vaguely condescending display of power and kisses your forehead before muttering, “Tell me you're a slut for me and not him.” You clench around his cock at the vaguely animalistic quality in Jay’s voice as he squeezes the base of your throat, bringing you dangerously close to the edge.
“Jongseong-”
“Say ‘I'm Park Jongseong's slut-” say it babe and I'm gonna fucking cum,” you’re already slipping into your orgasm, the pressure in your cunt building into the unmistakable feeling of immense fullness.
You're gushing around his cock as you scream. “Your slut- Fuck! I'm Park Jongseong's slut-”
His nails dig into the skin around your neck and his eyes roll into the back of your neck.
“Oh my fucking god-” your squirt threatens to push his cock out but he fucks you through it, muttering, “My fucking girl,” over and over again to guide you both through the storm.
Once it's all over, you're panting with the weight of your actions hanging heavy between you. He's about to speak but you stop him first. “I didn't know.” You whispered. “If I'd known I would've never been with him. You have to believe that.”
Jongseong collapses beside you, pulling against his chest as his hands pat down your hair, “I believe you.” He says with finality.
723 notes · View notes
parfaitblogs · 9 months ago
Text
peace ❀ s. reid x reader
in which you self isolate, and spencer knows better than to let it get too bad. 
pairing: spencer reid x reader genre: hurt/comfort tags: established relationship. suicide ideation? ("i want it to end"). depression. lots of stuff that coincides with that. brief mention of reader not eating/having no food. please be aware of your triggers. i think i mention reader as a girl somewhere? word count: 1.9k a/n: i finished this then relistened to peace (taylor swift) which was the og inspo for this, and added a section in the middle so if it feels weird its because i failed at integrating it! this was supposed to be out two days ago. all my relationship insecurities in a fic. lol how embarrassing here's my heart tumblr dot com!! anyways enjoy ily all
also posted here on my ao3 !
Three consistent raps against your front door was the only sound that got you up that day, pyjamas that you had not shed from your body in a week hanging off a frame that could probably be described as lifeless — with the nearly dead-looking face to match.
In fact, the only thing to prove you were still a living human being aside from your movement, was the pink hue around your eyes, on your nose, and above your lips, indicating how much you had cried recently. 
Usually, it isn't this bad. You just need a day or two of rotting in your apartment and doing nothing but scrolling on your phone until it died, staring at the wall, or — on the better days — watching reruns of a 90s sitcom that you don't really watch. 
But it was exceptionally bad this time around, for some odd reason, and not one part of you actually wanted to get up and out of bed for long enough to be productive about your day. Your phone had died again, after charging it two days ago, which meant you were on day six of no communication with anybody. Which might partly be why it was so bad now. 
You had a blanket wrapped around your body, dragging against the floor as you wiped your eyes and let out a small sigh, unlocking your front door and opening it, completely unsurprised by the person standing on the other side. 
He was the only one who ever paid enough attention to your disappearing act when you were like this. 
His eyes softened at the sight of you — which is kind of amusing, considering you thought you looked like death reincarnate currently. 
Neither of you said anything as you stepped aside to allow him in, the door clicking shut behind him as he placed down the leather bag he had slung over his body, turning back to you as he finally allowed the frown to appear — one you knew he would've had the entire way here.
"Have you eaten today?" was the first thing to break the silence — the question coming out so gentle you were sure you'd break down again at some point in the next few seconds. 
You wordlessly shook your head, and he nodded his own, saying nothing else as he walked into your kitchen, knowing you'd trail behind him no matter what. 
He opened your fridge first, before closing it when he was greeted with the alarming sight of nothing. Doing the same with your pantry, at which he turned around to look at you.
"Angel, you have no food," he said. And while it held no malice in the tone of his voice, you could tell he was slightly annoyed at the fact. Your heart ached. 
"I know. I'm sorry," you mumbled, and his eyebrows creased inwards. 
He didn't mention your apology — arguing with you about your vast use of 'sorry's' is futile. "Do you want a pizza?" he asked instead, and even though you, mentally, did not, you knew he wasn't actually asking. So you only nodded your head, and found a place at your countertop, the blanket falling from your body and pooling to the ground in a heap.
He ordered a pizza, and then he was nudging your knees apart, standing between them while you stayed sat on a stool, his chin atop your head, that was buried into his chest. 
And he said nothing, as he held you like that until the pizza arrived. And then he ensured you had at least eaten two slices, the remainders going in your fridge for the next meal you needed to eat. 
He was so kind to you, with his every movement, as he dragged you into the bathroom to help you shower. 
It was heartbreaking, the love you could see in his eyes. The tenderness in every stroke of his fingers against your scalp as he washed your hair, the softness in his touch as he did the same to your body. He gently dried you, told you to stay there, disappeared, and returned with one of his many t-shirts left in your apartment drawers. 
That was when you cracked. When he pulled the shirt over your head, that smelled so painfully Spencer and you. The mix of his clean scent and your own laundry detergent that you were so accustomed to, triggering something in you.
So, you crumpled to the floor of your bathroom, and he followed soon after, his arms wrapped around your body once more, firm enough to keep you still as you sobbed into his chest. 
You weren't sure how long you stayed like that for. Long enough for your head to hurt, and your eyes to sting, and hideous snot bubbles to stain his cardigan. 
When your sobs subsided, he spoke. 
"You wanna talk about it?" he said, quietly, and you shook your head. 
"Don't know what to talk about," you mumbled, and he knew that all too well.
He nodded his own head. "Did something happen?"
"Lots of little things."
"Yeah? You wanna tell me about them?"
You hesitated, because you didn't know where to begin. But then you nodded your head wordlessly, swallowing the lump — and, by extension, the sob — in your throat. "I fell down on the stairs at the train station in front of everybody. And then I missed my stop, and I was late to work. And I had a huge project due, but I didn't finish it, and I forgot I hadn't finished it, and I was anxious about it all day. And I think my friends are just pretending to be my friends, because I keep trying to make plans with one of them, and she keeps blowing me off for her boyfriend. And I'm just really sick of being sad all the time, Spencer. I want it to end."
With the onslaught of your bad vignettes throughout the past month coming back up, you broke down, again. Another sob escaping your lips as you pushed your fists down into the tops of his thighs.
If it hurt, he didn't say anything; simply continued to hold you against his chest, on the floor of your bathroom, that, if it were any other time, he would be having a field day rambling about the germs you both were currently sitting on. 
He also didn't say anything for a while as you sobbed, instead his fingers entangled gently in your hair, and he peppered kisses along the top of your head. 
"I don't want it to end for you," he finally said. His hands slid down from your scalp to your face, holding your cheeks with such tender, pulling you back so he could look at you. 
You sniffled. "I'm so exhausted."
"I know, my love. I know," he sighed, thumbs caressing over your cheekbones. "Ending it won't fix that. You know, logically, however you die is the state you'll be in, in the afterlife. So if you die while you're exhausted..."
"You don't believe in the afterlife," you answer, but his words still cracked through your tearful expression, and your lips twitched with a small smile. 
He returned the small smile, nodding his head. "That's true. But I also don't know anything about post-death. I could be wrong."
"How terrible," you mutter, and he laughed, quietly. 
"I know," he mused, falling silent for a few moments longer, with only both of your quiet breathing to break the silence. 
His fingers ran through your hair once more, and you sniffled audibly, your brain wandering away from the small content you had felt in that exchange, and back to one of the many reasons why you had isolated in the first place. 
"Why are you still with me?" you said, slicing through the silence all at once. 
You watched the smile fall, and his eyebrows furrowed, and his lips part as he went — and hesitated — to say something. "What do you mean?"
"I'm difficult." Your voice is impossibly small, and it breaks a crack in his heart as his eyes soften. 
"No. You're not," he reassured. 
"Yes I am," you breathed out — and then the tears came back. "I get sad and then I stop responding and stop seeing you, and you don't get any warning even though I know you should, and I feel so awful every time but then that makes me feel worse. And I'm sad all the fucking time, Spencer. I mean, I get upset when you aren't at home and you have to deal with all those messages and calls even though you hate texting, but then you get home and I'm isolating myself because I'm sad, on top of all the other things that make me sad, and you deserve better. You deserve someone who can give you their all and—and—"
"Hey," he cut you off, as did the sob that was ripped from your throat. "No. That's not what we're going to do. Do not sit there and tell me what I do and don't deserve." 
"But you do deserve better."
"No," he sighed, resting his forehead on your own, warm breath fanning across your face that usually made you scrunch your face up and pull away, now comforting you. "Do you love me?"
"What? Yes, of course I do. Why would you even—"
"—That is the only requirement I have for you," he said, oh so simply. When you didn't reply, he pressed, "Okay?"
"Okay," you murmured, and he relaxes a little.
More silence fell between you, your tears subsiding and your shaking body relaxing a little more. 
Then, "Did you hurt yourself when you fell down?"
You nodded your head, reluctantly pulling back from him so you could show him. You pointed to a yellowing bruise just below your knee, and the grazes on the bottom halves of your palms. 
"Oh, wow. Look at these," Spencer said, running a thumb gently over the grazes on your hands. "You're braver than me. These would've taken me out."
You laughed, and you saw his face light up at the progress he was making with you, and your mood. 
He then pulled you back into his chest. More silence, but less anxiety, and you sat comfortably in his arms for a few moments longer. 
"Did I worry you?" you say. "Not responding?"
You were so close to him you could hear his breath hitch, and you prepared yourself for a lie about how he wasn't worried at all. Except; "Honestly? Yes."
"Oh."
He exhaled, shakily, and you were kind of glad he couldn't see your sadder expression, half-buried into his chest. 
"You've never gone that long without checking in," he then explained. "The first two days I got what was going on. By the fourth I figured you still needed space. Today I just had a gut feeling."
"Just a gut feeling?" you echoed, and you felt his head nod against your own. 
"Thought you might need someone."
You sighed. "I hate that you're a genius."
"No you don't."
"No, I don't."
His fingers entangled in your hair again. "I also didn't figure you needed me here because I'm a genius."
"No? Then how?" you asked.
"It's simple," he murmured, tugging your head back oh so gently so he could look at you again — puffy eyed, and tear-stained cheeks and all. "I just know."
"That's the most illogical sentence I've ever heard leave your mouth."
He laughed, and you smiled again.
"Come on," he then said, untangling your limbs and pulling the both of you up to your feet, hands ghosting your waist to hold you steady. "I am willing to sit through whatever awful movie you want me to watch."
your reblogs and replies are always appreciated dearly ♡
985 notes · View notes
theglassofmiddleearth · 12 days ago
Text
Evenfall
Imagine you wake up in Twilight as a random side character. (Part 1)
Nullification!reader Human reader! SideCharacter Bella! Isekai au! Edward Cullen X reader. Eventually Jacob Black x reader. (2 endings.)
Next
Tumblr media
Blinking her eyes open, Y/N’s gaze fixed upon the unfamiliar white ceiling. She wrinkled her nose, sitting up on her bed, feeling the cotton sheets beneath her crumple. The room seemed untouched, meaning that Y/N hadn’t been here long.
‘Where….?’ She frowned, ‘Where the hell am I?’ Y/N ran a hand over her face and swung her legs off the bed, feeling the carpeted floor beneath her toes. Glancing at the suitcase beneath her feet, she gambled that it was full of her personal belongings. This would mean she had most likely just arrived somewhere seeing as the suitcase was haphazardly unzipped, her clothes strewn about.
The plinking of the rain slapping against her glass window was comforting, grounding her from hyperventilating. It was cold and wet, the entire sky was tinted in a greyish blue. She couldn’t tell if it was early morning or evening, but based on the birds chirping, it seemed to be dawn. It also looked like it had snowed the night before. How pleasant. This wasn’t her first time waking up in a different world. However, the knowledge of where she resided was always quite slow to come. It was irritating, to say the least.
Stumbling her way into the bathroom connected to the room, she turned on the faucet and splashed the cool water on her face.
At least all her features were still her own, she noted, staring into her reflection in the mirror. Huh, she looked to be herself when she was in high school? Y/N shook her head and stepped back into her room, looking around somewhat frantically. Which world did she wake up in??
A ringing in her ears began, soft at first, crescendoing into a roar. She always hated this part, the memories, emotions and information, all rushing to cram itself into her mind. Overwhelming as it was, the process was short, swift and very much necessary.
Ah, she was Y/N L/N in this world too. A side character. Just moved in from Australia as a transfer student. Her parents had been friends with Charlie Swan before they moved. She called him ‘Unca’ Charlie when she was young. All her memories from the real world were merging into place.
‘Hey, kid! School starts in half an hour!’ A gruff voice called, flowing into her seem of thoughts.
She had gotten here the night before, she was staying in the room next to his daughter’s, Bella. She was moving in from phoenix apparently and would be arriving not long after Y/N.
Wait
Charlie Swan? Daughter named Bella?
‘Son of a bitch.’ She muttered, ‘Really? Twilight? How am I meant to survive here?’
‘Hey, everything alright?’ The voice was closer now, outside of her door. It was probably Charlie.
‘Yeah, m’fine just have a headache!’ She called through the door, slumping down, head in her hands.
Three raps came from the wood before the door slowly whinged open, revealing a handsome middle aged man.
‘Y/N, do you… is there anything….’ Charlie began, his eyebrows were drawn in concern.
‘I’ll be ok. When did you say Bella was coming back again?’ She sighed out, dropping her hands and looking up at the man helplessly.
‘Tomorrow! Did you wanna just start school with her on Monday?’ He asked with a small smile.
‘It’s okay, I’ll go today so I can at least show her around. After all today is Friday, i'll have the weekend to recover. It’s the least I could do.’ Y/N smiled at him, standing and moving to her suitcase. Charlie was empathetic. Kind. Y/N felt bad for him in this story. Bella wasn’t exactly a good daughter. She hummed, slapping on an appropriate outfit for school. Y/N narrowed her eyes at the drizzly sky before deciding to grab a sweater just in case.
Ah, highschool. What a fucking waste of time.
Charlie had driven her there and offered to take her to the office but Y/N shook her head. She didn't want to inconvenience him anymore than she already had.
‘I’ll be fine Charlie, thank you for the ride, I’ll see you tonight?’ She smiled at him. Charlie had offered for her to borrow the car that he had bought for Bella. Y/N however, did not want to drive to school seeing as she had no idea where said school was, and maps were a hassle.
‘Alright kiddo, give ‘em hell!’ He waved, before shifting gears out of parking and preparing to make his way to work. Y/N waved as he rolled away, allowing her smile to slip when he was well out of sight.
‘Alright Forks, do your worst.’ She rolled her eyes, trudging past the horde of teenagers and into the school building. There were a couple of stares here and there that Y/N fully ignored. She made her way through the pruned shrubbery and a walkway, following the sign that indicated she was going in the right direction.
The office was small, disgustingly warm, and stuffy. It was not so different from the typical office of any other school. The pastel yellow reminded her of hospital walls.
Y/N cleared her throat. Trying to catch the attention from behind the desk of the woman, click-clacking away at a computer.
The red-haired woman looked up, pushing a finger under her glasses. "Can I help you?"
"I'm Y/N L/N," Y/N informed her, watching the light behind the woman's eyes slowly blink on.  Gossips, all of them, Y/N grumbled in her mind. Forks was a small town and she had no doubt that everyone knew that she was an outsider. The girl who left her parents Down Under to come study in America! Hopefully she wasn’t asked any stupid questions.
"Of course," the lady from behind the desk said. She dug through a precariously stacked pile of documents on her desk till she found the ones she was looking for. 
"I have your schedule right here, and a map of the school." She brought several sheets to the counter.
‘Thanks very much ma’am. Have a great day.’ Y/N gave her a polite smile before pushing out of the office doors and into the cold, wet outside.
Following the sea of students, she glanced at her schedule and up at the classroom numbers, filtering through the rooms before finding her own.
Slipping into a classroom marked on her schedule, she slinked, silently to the back and sat down.
Ignoring all the people around her until the teacher would inevitably call out her name and bring the gaze of gossip hungry teenagers onto her.
Great.
She slumped into her table and pulled her hoodie up to cover her head. Y/N was heavily hoping that none of the Cullen's were in her class. ANY of her classes. She didn’t need the mind reading emo in her brain or the still flighty, ex-soldier who was struggling with his cravings. Alice would be alright, she seemed to be the nicest sibling in the family besides Emmett.
‘Y/N L/N?’ The teacher called, raising an eyebrow at the unfamiliar name. She could feel the scrutiny under his gaze, along with the rest of the class. Y/N could hear the whispers
‘Uh yeah that's me.’ Y/N said, in a whisper. Shrinking back into her seat as she felt eyes burning into her silhouette. Now, she felt almost bad for Bella. She would have it worse, being the chief's daughter and all.
Someone was staring, boring their eyes into her form.
Y/N looked up, shifting her gaze from the floor to her left slightly.
Black eyes glinting. Nay, burning a hole into her own. High cheekbones, reddish brown hair and pale perfect skin.
Shit.
The boy jerked his head back slightly, looking as if he had been hit. He gave a quiet gasp, shaking his head and gripping his desk. Y/N was in the same homeroom as Edward Cullen .
The bell rang, a nasally drone. Y/N stood quickly, grabbing her backpack and rushing to her first class. Stealing a look at her schedule she bumped against the crowd of people in the hallway.
She was lost.
‘In what universe does this map even make sense.’ She snarled quietly, as the hallways began to slowly filter out people, leaving her standing at a locker that she didn't own.
‘Are you lost?’ A soft, melodious voice, from behind Y/N snapped the poor girl to attention.
‘What in the flaming-’ Y/N whipped around, brandishing her schedule like a weapon.
‘Are you lost?’ The question was gentler this time, probing for an answer.
Y/N’s eyes widened, looking at the owner of the voice.
Edward Cullen.
Crap
‘I uh, yes but I’ll find my way thanks, don’t let me keep you from class!’ She sputtered out, backing away from the boy who gazed curiously at her. Y/N didn’t give a chance for the boy to respond, power walking away to a direction of which she was only semi-sure was correct. Seeing as Edward Cullen was meant to be a mind reader, Y/N wasn't too sure about being within a five foot radius of him. What if he killed her because she knew he was a vampire?
Finding her way to her classroom ended up proving difficult as she had walked in the wrong direction. She had managed to end up in English without being too late. Luckily for her, she had already finished reading all the books they would be studying. She knew the content and remembered the gist of all her essays. English would be a breeze.
American History on the other hand, would be a different story. However, she was confident that she would pick it up. After all, it wasn’t like she had to study for the other subjects. She had graduated highschool before. 
Lunch came around and Y/N had followed the rest of her gym class to the cafeteria. Edward was in the same gym class as her but she split off as soon as the coach blew his whistle. She ended up trying to think of anything that wouldn't draw his attention.
‘So, you found your way to class alright.’ Edwards' voice came from behind Y/N. 
‘I did, thank you for asking.’ Y/N stiffened, grabbing onto an apple hard, breaking the skin with her nails. She couldn't just dash away from the lunch line. Could she?
‘Hi! You must be Y/N! I see you've met Edward!!’ A girl from behind Edward hummed. She was shorter, hair in a manic pixie cut and a knowing smile. Behind her was another boy, blonde and just as chiselled as Edward.
‘Come sit with us!’ The girl grinned, as she gestured towards an empty table. The boy next to this new girl seemed to be in pain.
‘She won’t be sitting with us.’ Edward snapped, voice strained.
Y/N frowned and sneered at him.
‘Don’t worry, I wasn’t even thinking of it.'
The girl spun around and walked off to return her tray. Y/N had lost her appetite and her temper. She sent Edward one last withering look before grabbing her apple from the tray and storming off. Y/N didn’t need to be friends with the Cullen's to survive. She could just move away right after high school graduation. 
The rest of the day proved to be less interesting, thank goodness. Y/N flew through the rest of the day, avoiding the Cullen's at all costs. She had briefly made friends with Angela, Y/N remembered she was kind in the books. One of the only good friends Bella had. Jessica also proved to be just as much of a gossip as she was in the book. However she did introduce herself politely.
Y/N deflated slightly. Charlie was still at work. She would have to walk home. Not that walking was an issue, it was more like she didn't actually quite remember where home was…
Crossing the car park, she slipped on her earphones and walked towards the road. Bella would be arriving tomorrow and the timeline would continue. Everything would be the same and she woul-
The screeching of tires on gravel. Burnt rubber. Y/N heard a loud cry from in front of her and glanced up to see a vehicle heading straight towards her.
178 notes · View notes
bamfkeeper · 8 months ago
Text
Kurt has a bad night, he asks if he can stay with you.
I have my own thoughts about his past, but a lot of comics and stuff have shown it to be pretty terrible. I wish they'd show it more. Because I'm a freak who lives on angst.
Warnings: Bad dreams, mentions of past abuse/mistreatment, overall sad vibes but with comfort for our boi. Unedited lmao. Gender neutral reader. <3
WC: 2.8k
Tumblr media Tumblr media
You awoke to a soft rap at your door, the grogginess in your head heavy as you slowly sat up from your slumber. The room was still dim as the gentle moonlight filtered through the curtains. You blinked the sleep out of your eyes when the rap repeated, more insistent this time, urging you to rise.
With a sigh, you slipped out of the warm cocoon of your sheets, feeling the chill of the early morning air on your skin. The floor was icy cold under your bare feet as you padded towards the bedroom door, each step making you more aware of the lingering drowsiness that clung to you.
Upon opening the door, you were taken aback to see Kurt standing there, looking quite disheveled and out of sorts. His curly hair was an unruly mess, and his clothes were wrinkled, adding to his overall appearance of exhaustion. He seemed not just tired, but also profoundly sad, or perhaps disturbed in some inexplicable way. You could see the weight of some unspoken burden in his eyes. "Kurt? It's the middle of the night..." you began quietly, your voice tinged with concern as your eyes scanned his entire body, noting every detail that hinted at his distress.
"Ja...ja, I know," he whispered, his voice barely loud enough for you to hear. "Do you mind...if I stay with you tonight?" His question caught you off guard, and you blinked as the sleep faded slightly at his question. He must've had a terrible night if he was asking to stay in your room. You couldn't help but wonder what had happened to make him feel so desperate for comfort.
Kurt had been too nervous to sleep with you before, something about not being able to keep himself under control or...maybe it just made him nervous? You remembered the times he had hesitated at your door, his eyes filled with a mix of longing and fear. Despite his apprehensions, however, you were more than willing to compromise. You loved him deeply and cherished your relationship, and if he wanted to keep separate bedrooms, so be it.
You had always believed that love was about understanding and respecting each other's boundaries, and you were prepared to do just that for Kurt.
As you looked him over, you could see him shaking a bit. His hands trembled slightly, and his eyes darted around nervously. Was he nervous? He seemed really upset, almost like he was fighting back tears, and it made your chest ache with concern. "Of course you can...come on." You moved from the door and let him come in, which he quickly did, almost as if he couldn't wait to get inside.
He stepped into your room and looked around, his eyes scanning the familiar surroundings with an air of desperation. His gaze lingered on the bed, as if it represented some form of comfort or solace he desperately needed at that moment.
"You can get in bed...if you want? Are you sure you're ready to sleep together?" you asked gently, your voice filled with concern and tenderness. You placed a comforting hand on his back, hoping to offer some reassurance in this vulnerable moment. However, you felt him flinch slightly under your touch, causing you to retract your hand quickly, worried that he might react poorly or feel uncomfortable.
"I'm sorry," he responded quickly, almost as if on instinct. His voice was shaky and filled with uncertainty. "I...I didn't mean to..." he rasped out a quick apology, his words tumbling over each other in his haste to explain. He looked at you with wide eyes, like he were on the verge of panicking, his face a mix of fear and desperation. You could see the struggle within him, the conflict between wanting closeness and his fear of vulnerability. You felt a surge of empathy and wished there was something more you could do to ease his distress.
"Hey, hey... it's fine, Kurt..." you reassured him gently, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "What happened... do you want to talk about it? I'm here for you, and you can tell me anything."
He looked uncertain, as if he didn't even know where to begin. His eyes were cast downward, staring at his hands while he absentmindedly fiddled with the fabric of his clothes. After a moment, he glanced up at you, his eyes searching for reassurance. "I... just want to lay down... bitte," he murmured softly, his voice almost a whisper. You could see the weariness in his expression and knew he needed some time to process whatever was troubling him.
You both managed to crawl into your bed, with him making himself right at home, curling up in the sheets and laying down. He curled up like a cat, his legs drawn up close to his body, and his tail wrapped around him as he nestled into a tight ball. The sight of him doing this was both endearing and concerning. You could tell that something was wrong, but you didn't want to push too hard for him to open up and tell you about it. Instead, you chose to give him some space, hoping that in time he would feel comfortable enough to share what was bothering him. You watched him for a moment, your concern growing.
You slipped in next to him, slowly and gently pulling the blankets over the two of you, wrapping you both in a comforting cocoon. He seemed so meek and vulnerable in that moment, which was quite unexpected and strange to see. He murmured an apology to you, his voice soft and filled with regret, looking up from his little spot. As he uncurled ever so slightly, you noticed the weariness in his eyes. "I have not had...the best of nights," he confessed, his words carrying weight you didn't like to hear.
"How so...?" you questioned gently, your voice soft and filled with concern, wanting to be patient, yet also eager to understand what was troubling him. You slowly scooted closer, trying to offer comfort through your presence, hoping that your proximity would provide some solace. Kurt sat up a little more, his posture shifting as he took a deep breath, his chest rising and falling with a heavy sigh. His eyes seemed distant, as if he was searching for the right words to articulate his feelings, the weight of his emotions clearly visible on his face.
"I had a bad dream," he started, cringing to himself at how childish that sounded. He felt embarrassed telling you he had a nightmare, but he wanted to get it out so you understood. "It was when I was still living in Germany, at the circus."
"Oh," you replied gently. You honestly didn't know much about the time he spent there. You only knew of the performances and the random small things he'd mention, like the colorful costumes and the lively crowds, but none of it was ever bad. You had heard anecdotes of the tightrope walkers and the clowns, but never anything that seemed dark or troubling. So you weren't sure what caused the nightmare.
"What was the nightmare of...?" your voice softly broke the heavy silence, causing him to flinch slightly. His mind wandered back to the harrowing treatment he had endured at the hands of the owner. He recalled the brief, haunting flashes of the small, cold cage he was kept in, the suffocating confinement that gnawed at his spirit. He could almost feel the searing burn in his veins from the drugs he had been injected with to keep him quiet, the chemicals coursing through his body, numbing his senses. All the while, he remembered the crowds that stared at him, their eyes cold and unfeeling, regarding him as nothing more than a mere spectacle, just another animal to gawk at and forget.
He hated remembering. How he had been stripped of all humanity, treated like a creature not meant to be. Drugged and caged, it was utterly humiliating.
"I performed...but it was not all good things. After each of my performances, I was given a drug to keep me docile and weak, making it easier for them to control me. Once the show was over, I was kept in a cage where I spent most of my time when I wasn't performing in the big tent. There wasn't anything in the cage besides some sparse hay scattered on the floor, which didn't really do much..." he mumbled. "It was cold and hard, laying on the surface hurt my joints after so long. But...what could I do?"
You listened intently as Kurt began to describe the horrific conditions he was kept in, and your heart ached terribly with every word he spoke. "They didn't give me much to eat," he began, his voice barely above a whisper. "I felt sick a lot of the time. The owner wasn't nice at all... He treated me just like the animals. When I trained, he would use a whip on me, just like he did to them." Kurt's voice was filled with a quiet resignation as he continued to recount the harrowing experiences he had endured.
The pain and suffering he had gone through were evident in his every word, painting a vivid picture of the cruelty he had faced in your mind, making you want to cry for him. You imagined a younger Kurt, being forced to flip around until his feet hurt while an angry man lashed him bloody. It made you angry, your emotions burning you up inside, even if it was all in the past.
Kurt swallowed thickly, pausing for a few moments as he gathered his thoughts. "I just...my dream was about all that," he began, his voice trembling slightly. "I was there again, back in that horrid place. I felt the cold metal of the cage around me, trapping me, making me feel so small and powerless. They were giving me drugs to make me weak, I felt the substances sap my strength and will to move at all. Strangers were surrounding me, faceless figures poking and prodding me through the bars. They were trying to get a reaction from me, as if I were some kind of experiment, as if I couldn't think or speak for myself. It was as if they saw me as less than human, just a creature to be studied and tormented."
It was truly awful to listen to. Hearing the unvarnished truth about his upbringing was absolutely heartbreaking. You couldn't have imagined he had experienced such harrowing things, especially considering that the only things he ever mentioned prior to this were lighthearted and fun. He would occasionally showcase an acrobatic skill or share random knowledge about specific animals, most of which were used in the circus. His stories were always filled with a sense of wonder and excitement, he had a ways with words, the dear showman he was.
But Kurt had never mentioned anything remotely like this before. It was as if a curtain had been pulled back, revealing a world of pain and hardship that he had kept hidden. The contrast between his usual cheerful anecdotes and this sudden revelation was stark and deeply unsettling. It made you see him in a completely new light, amazed at the strength it must have taken for him to carry such a burden while still managing to bring joy to others.
From the little he mentioned, an onlooker might not think it’s that big of a deal, but you had to consider the fact that he endured these hardships almost his entire life. His upbringing, starting from infancy and continuing until the moment Xavier found him, was filled with severe mistreatment. He was beaten regularly, starved to the point of extreme malnutrition, drugged with substances that left him in a constant haze, and kept in captivity as if he were one of those beautiful but tragic animals in a zoo. This cycle of abuse and neglect shaped his entire existence, leaving deep emotional and physical scars that would take a lifetime to heal.
And he somehow still managed to see the good in the world. In everyone.
You could tell he was struggling to continue, his eyes filled with a mixture of pain and exhaustion. Instead of pressing him with more questions that might overwhelm him, you just gently tugged him a little closer, offering silent support. "It's okay," you murmured softly, your voice filled with warmth and reassurance. "You are here now, somewhere safe. I'm here with you, I always will be." You wanted him to feel every bit of your sincerity. As you spoke, you pulled him to lay even closer, deciding that tonight was a good night to be the big spoon, wrapping him in your protective embrace. He needed you right now, and you were more than happy to provide him with the comfort and security he needed.
Kurt scooted closer, his tail wrapped securely around your leg and his face buried deeply into your chest. He loves you profoundly, cherishing not only your presence but also how you allowed him to share something so deeply personal without any judgment or excessive questions. He didn't feel like explaining or answering questions at that moment. He just... needed your comfort, your warmth, and the unspoken understanding that you would be there for him no matter what. Your silent support made him feel safe and accepted, his eyes burned with tears that threatened to pour out, he tried so hard to hold it in.
You could feel his body shake more intensely as he laid there with you, his shoulders racked with silent crying, and you couldn't stand to see him in such pain. The sight of his sorrow broke your heart into pieces. Your hand gently rubbed his back in a soothing manner, and you tugged him closer to you, your arms tightening slightly around him as if to shield him from his anguish. "It's okay," you whispered softly and reassuringly, trying to convey all the love and comfort you could through those simple words.
Your reassurance helped immensely, providing him with the comfort and security he desperately needed. He cried quietly, finally giving in to his overwhelming emotions and letting out everything he had been holding in for so long. For months, he had bottled up all his problems, always putting others before himself and never considering that he should prioritize his own well-being. The weight of his emotions had been building up for so long, and the bad dreams he had been experiencing recently were the final straw that pushed him over the edge. It was a release of months of pent-up emotion.
He needed this release desperately; it was a cathartic experience for him, allowing him to purge the overwhelming emotions that had built up inside. And you were there, steadfast and unwavering, grounding him amidst the turmoil that threatened to consume him. You were his shelter, his rock, supporting him with soothing whispers and tender kisses on his temple as he cried quietly against you. Kurt tried his best not to let his tears fall on you, but you didn't care in the slightest. Your only concern was to keep him close, right against your chest, providing the comfort and solace he so desperately needed.
Kurt's crying gradually slowed down and he finally stopped, his little sobs quieting and his uneven breathing becoming more steady, only hitching every so often as he tried to calm himself. He stayed curled up against you, feeling more comforted and secure than he ever had before in his life. In that moment, he cherished you deeply, more than words could express. "Danke...I..I did not mean to get so...emotional," he whispered softly, his voice tinged with embarrassment about his unexpected breakdown. He glanced up at you, seeing the kindness and love in your eyes.
"It's okay, Kurt. I promise. I'm here for you, no matter what you need. If you need a good cry like this, then so be it," you reassured, your voice gentle and soothing. "I just want you to know that you're not alone, you're safe, surrounded by family now," you continued, emphasizing the word 'family' to remind him that he is in a place where he is loved and cared for. "We all care about you deeply, especially me..." You kissed his forehead lightly while your thumb wiped his cheek. "And we'll get through this together. Whatever happens, we'll face it side by side.”
With your gentle reassurance and comforting presence, he finally found the peace he needed to fall asleep. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, his night wasn't plagued by the harsh and haunting memories of the circus. Instead of being tormented by those painful recollections, he slept peacefully throughout the night. Nestled securely in your arms, he lovingly nuzzled even closer to your chest, finding solace and warmth in your embrace.
Undisturbed rest had eluded him long enough.
Tumblr media
Thanks for reading.
*BAMF*
Tumblr media
dividers by @/adornedwithlight
649 notes · View notes
jinnie-ret · 1 year ago
Text
people pleaser
Tumblr media
stray kids x ninth member!reader (platonic)
genre: fluff, angst
content warnings: toxic friends
word count: 3.6k
summary: in her one kid's room episode, y/n reflects on how it was hard for her not to be so kind and sweet to everyone, because she just wanted them to like her.
MAIN MASTERLIST
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
The music at the start of the video played, cutting between different things the members were saying.
"Ah, she's too kind for her own good," Seungmin shook his head with a slightly sad smile.
"She hypes everyone up, she's like a mood maker of the group," Lee Know added on.
"Y/N is very selfless," Jeongin said turning his head to the others as they nodded.
"One Kid's Room, Y/N!" Y/N smiled into the camera, relaxed into the armchair with her comfy purple fleece on.
••••••
Ever since the group's trainee days, Y/N had been a people pleaser. Not that she realised that fact about herself, until it came to the future where she would reflect on herself.
She remembered when she had seen Han around the practice rooms, and it didn't matter what he did, singing, dancing or rapping... he was talented in all areas. He was even charming to her despite his shyness occasionally. She knew for sure he'd debut soon, he was an ace after all. There were also rumours going around that her good friend Chan was creating a group to join the showcase and have a chance at debuting. She wanted to be like him, so she made a lot of effort to greet him and be kind to him.
"Hi Jisung!" she would wave at him as she passed him in the corridors of JYP Entertainment.
Of course, Han being Han, would wave back without really knowing who she was at first, but he felt too awkward to ignore her. When he spoke to his hyung about a pretty girl always saying 'hello' at him, Chan was quick to tell Han about who his friend Y/N was (and also that she was off limits because he was thinking of adding her to the group but he didn't tell Han that last part).
Soon they became more comfortable around each other and Y/N found herself practising singing songs with Han, wishing she could belt notes like he could too.
"Wow, you're so good at hitting those higher notes! I wish I could do that," Y/N turned her head towards Han, from where they were both lying down on the practice room floor, feet pointed outwards to opposite walls but their heads side by side.
"Hey, you've got a great voice too, you know?" Han quickly moved his head to the side to look at her, but decided against it and stared right back up at the ceiling.
"You really think so?" Y/N's voice wavered. She needed reassurance, she knew that herself. There was still a long way to go, but she'd get to a place she wanted with her voice one day.
"I know so. Maybe one day you could be my backup singer?" Han said casually, before belly laughing when Y/N leaned over and turned to him with a pout.
"Hannnn!" she whined.
"Yah, you know I'm joking, just keep practising, you'll do great, yeah?" Han said genuinely, before standing up and hauling her up himself as they left the practice room.
•••
The next to join the group Chan was preparing for was a boy the same age as her, Jeongin. He was cute, Y/N thought, shy as well and maybe even similar to herself in some ways for wanting the approval of others, especially their future leader.
Dropping her bag in the corner of the room, first to arrive, Y/N quickly exited the practise room realising she needed the bathroom. Only to return to see Jeongin sheepishly standing in the entrance, Han looking away and Chan stood in the middle of the room with his arms folded.
"Jeongin you should have been here ten minutes ago," the Australian guy frowned running a hand through his hair. Ten minutes? Wow, Chan could be scary sometimes, and Y/N didn't regret joining the group lineup so far, but he was pretty strict.
"I-i was just..." Jeongin tried speaking up but clearly didn't have the words to explain why, practice bag in between his legs and hands clasped nervously behind his back.
"Oh that's my fault, Chan," Y/N decided to lie for him and came forward and stood next to Jeongin, resting her hand on his shoulder as they stood at the same height, "I was showing Jeongin this video at the dorms and I insisted he watch it before we leave..." she even looked off to the side awkwardly, and that part was genuine because the moment Chan let out a huff through his nose, she felt intimidated.
"Guys.... ugh, just, get ready for practice, yeah?" Chan sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose as the two youngest rushes to one side of the room.
"Why did you do that?" Jeongin whispered, pulling out his bottle of water.
"Because I want to know why you were really late," Y/N joked and nudges his shoulder, making him laugh.
"Guys, stop messing around!" Chan rolled his eyes. Y/N wasn't so sly, he saw her bag that had already been there, and knew she hadn't arrived at the same time as Jeongin, but he allowed the excuse nonetheless.
•••
Walking back into the dorms after a busy shift at work, with school the next day, hearing a loud argument was not ideal at all for Y/N. And of course, it had to be between Han and Hyunjin. The taller boy had recently been recruited by Chan after his exceptional dance skills and potential. Perhaps Han was jealous? Y/N didn't really know, all she wanted was her bed right now but she hated the confrontation she heard.
"You can't just leave your things around everywhere! You're so messy!" Hyunjin yelled at Han.
Y/N peeked her head round the hallway after taking off her coat and shoes to see them yelling at each other in the lounge. Chan and Jeongin were nowhere to be seen - they must be out somewhere.
"I was here first! You think I care about your complaints? Get over yourself!" Han shouted, fists clenched at his sides.
"Oh so it's not ok for me to complain, but you get to act like a spoilt brat and like you're better than everyone else?!" Hyunjin yelled once more.
"Guys, what are you doing?" Y/N yawned, staring at the shouting boys who immediately flipped round to their dongsaeng.
"Oh, hey Y/N," Hyunjin's eyes softened, and so did his tone as he saw her standing there tiredly.
"What are you doing up so late?" Han questioned, glancing across at her.
"She works, remember? Gosh, you don't care about anyone but yourself and-" Hyunjin shouted before Y/N quietly cut him off with her calming demeanour.
"Stop. Just stop. You ask me why I'm up late but you two are up awake and arguing... If we're gonna be a team we can't go on like this. And that's not fair to Chan," Y/N shook her head sighing. She couldn't even look at the boys, but from the resounding silence there was she hoped her words had gotten through to them.
"I guess you're right," Hyunjin nodded, shifting awkwardly on one leg.
They all looked at Y/N as if seeing her in a whole new way, she seemed more mature than ever in that moment.
"We all have early starts tomorrow, don't we?" Y/N checked with them, chewing on her lip.
"You're right we do," Han sighed and nodded.
"Right, let's sleep then," Y/N nodded and rushed off to her room, not wanting to be in that situation again. She liked offering her advice, yes, but being the voice of reason? That felt like another level of having responsibility.
"Let's not fight again," Hyunjin whispered, tired himself, physically and emotionally.
All Han could do was roll his eyes and nod as they retreated to their rooms.
It may not have been the last time they fought, but they both put in more effort to control their emotions.
•••
3RACHA was completed. Changbin joined Han and Chan in making music and releasing in onto SoundCloud together, and despite his darker aura, the boy was one of the most caring guys she had ever met.
He would check up on her often, noticing her floating away into her own little world. It happened again one day, when Y/N was sat in the studio with the three guys, until Chan and Han went to collect lunch.
"You good, Y/Nnie?" Changbin asked, breaking the comfortable silence that was in the room.
"Hmm, yeah, why?" Y/N wiped sleep out of her eyes as she saw him staring back at her.
"It's ok, you know, to be upset, or tired," Changbin gently spoke, sensing from the start that she was a sensitive, soft soul.
"I'm not upset... I just need to improve, that's all..." Y/N sighed, curling up into a tighter ball on the sofa, tugging a blanket over her legs.
"I saw your face after the staff spoke to you," Changbin informed her, helping to straighten out the blanket.
"They just said that I shouldn't expect to be a part of the group if I'm dancing and singing the way I do and that even a rat would have done a better job," Y/N shrugged, not able to look at Changbin.
"They what? They can't say rude shit like that to you!" Changbin stood up, arms folded.
"I-it was just constructive criticism," Y/N jumped slightly, not expecting the strong reaction from her fellow group member.
"No, they were rude to you, there's a difference between constructive criticism and being rude. How is what they said helpful in any way?!" Changbin growled, shaking his head with a clenched jaw.
"I just caught them in a bad mood-" Y/N shared the thought that was playing over and over again in her head, eyes shining as she looked up at Changbin.
"No, you didn't, ok? It's alright," Changbin side hugged her to him, joining her back on the sofa, "it's ok to feel sad from what they said, I just want you to talk to me about it, I'm here. Now, come on, Chan and Han will be back with food soon."
•••
Next to join the group was a charming freckled boy, also from Australia. He had quickly grown close with Chan from their shared nationality, but Y/N craved to be close with him too. She wanted him to like her, after all, she got on well with her other members, so she found herself worrying when she hadn't really had a chance to bond with him yet.
He was a cute and loveable guy, and with the language barrier, Felix not really knowing a lot of Korean yet, Y/N felt disheartened when her words would be met with a blank look from him. She just hadn't connected the dots yet, not realising it was because her quick ramblings in Korean were an overwhelming whirlwind of incomprehensible words.
"Hi Felix! I'm so glad you joined the group, you've got such a cool voice I think it will really make us stand out!" Y/N gushed to Felix after they all did a vocal practice together.
"Thank you," Felix awkwardly answered before looking away at the ground, smiling bigger only when Chan stood next to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.
That was when Y/N decided she needed to find a better way to communicate with Felix, so she started writing notes, using an online translator to write an English translation below her Korean words, to tell him words of encouragement and show him she was there as a friend.
•••
"Thanks Y/N! See you soon, maybe," Y/N's trainee friends giggled as they left the lobby of JYP, Y/N waving goodbye to them as she zipped her purse back up.
"What was that about?" Seungmin spoke up, leant against the wall opposite her.
"Oh, umm, my friends asked if they could borrow some of my money to get some snacks," Y/N grinned, feeling happy she was able to help her friends.
"You didn't have to do that... give them your money so easily," Seungmin shook his head, walking over and standing closer to her now.
Seungmin was recognised for his polite nature and gorgeous voice, hence his joining of the group.
"It's ok, really, they needed it and plus they said they'd pay me back," Y/N defended her friends, lips pursing when she saw Seungmin frown.
"Whenever I see those friends of yours they ask for money," Seungmin was trying really hard for Y/N to see sense.
"It's fine I have a part time job for a reason," Y/N smiled, trying to brush away Seungmin's concerned but it only made it worse.
"Yeah, not to fund their snacks," his eyes only widened in response.
"They need it," Y/N's voice became higher pitched, as she was desperate for Seungmin to believe her and just leave alone the subject. She didn't want to be in any sort of argument with him but he also didn't want him to be thinking badly of her friends.
"So do you, please be careful around them," Seungmin sighed and patted her shoulder, seeing she wanted to leave the subject alone, as they both left the company.
Later that night at the dorms, Y/N and Seungmin were relaxing on the sofa, with the other members too, as they scrolled through their phones. Looking at her social media, Y/N tapped on her friend's story, only to see they were all hanging out without her, and seemed to be eating at a slightly more expensive fast food restaurant. But they didn't even have enough money for a snack earlier?!
It seemed Y/N had spoke this last thought out loud. Seungmin peered over her shoulder and frowned, recognising the people in the photos as his younger member's friends.
Stopping himself from telling her 'I told you so', Seungmin offered his comfort.
"You've got us, yeah? Don't worry about them anymore," Seungmin swiped off of the story and took her phone out of her hands.
"I don't know what i did wrong..." Y/N bit her lip, wondering how she always went wrong with her friends.
"You did nothing wrong, they took advantage of your kindness, Y/N, now let me order some fried chicken for us, yeah?"
•••
The final member Chan added to the lineup was a guy called Minho, who, very impressively, had completed the basic JYP dance moves in 2 weeks. Y/N was in awe of him.
"I can't believe you completed the moves already! I bet Chan will make you dance leader when we all get to debut together!" Y/N smiled at Lee Know, singing his praises.
"Aha, thank you," Lee Know awkwardly bowed at her, not really saying much after. Y/N just wanted to compliment him and show her appreciation, but seeing his short responses made her feel awkward too, and soon they'd be left in silence.
Y/N found herself sat there thinking, she spent so long trying to get everyone to like her, but maybe what she said, what she did, wasn't good enough?
"Is this too much for you?" Chan sat down next to Y/N, who had isolated herself to sit in the corner of the practice room.
"No it's fine," Y/N waved her hand away, running a hand through her hair.
"Tell me the truth," Chan insisted, shifting his body to look at her, feeling concerned.
"I am, I'm fine," Y/N bluntly said, not wanting to talk about how she truly was feeling, and the thoughts she was having.
"Don't lie to me, I need to know you can do this, I don't want you stressing out, we've got the showcase ahead of us, Y/N," Chan urged her to tell the truth, resting a hand on her knee, patting it gently.
"Look, ok, it is a lot to deal with but I can do it, I promise you. I just, I'm trying to figure everything in my head," Y/N leant her head back against the wall, closing her eyes.
"Thank you for telling me the truth, and, Y/N, that's why we're here, we don't want you feeling like you're on your own when you do so much for all of us, ok?" Chan side hugged her, warmth in his eyes, and some relief there when he finally broke through to her.
"I am? I mean, I do a lot for you guys?" Y/N's voice pleaded for the truth, looking at Chan with hope in her eyes.
"You always do," he smiled and ruffled her hair.
••••••
Back to One Kids Room, Y/N smiled as she thought about how she had come as a person.
"As much as I still look up to my members, my self-esteem has grown so much and I've learnt to value myself. I love them so much, but I need to give myself energy and time too," Y/N smiled at the camera, hands squeezing the long arms of her sleeves and balling them up.
"She's so much more confident now, I remember she used to ask me if this was fine or that but now she's more confident," Changbin commented, the other guys nodding in agreement.
"She used to come to me being like, woahhhhh you're such a good dancer!" Lee Know chucked, thinking of the younger version of Y/N, who would always praise her members.
"Ah yes she'd speak exactly like that! Wow... And she'd look at me like, with these wide eyes being like, I wanna rap like you!" Han laughed as he perfectly imitated how Y/N spoke to him.
"She used to have this really sweet habit, when I didn't know Korean very well, umm, she'd leave these little notes for me, and write the Korean and English translation for me just so I knew what she was saying. There'd always be these words of encouragement, it just made my heart feel warm," Felix told the members, who all 'ooh'ed in response, shocked at this fact because they didn't know that Y/N used to do that.
"Ah, yes, I did used to leave notes for Felix... I wanted to be his friend so badly! He just seemed so cool but whenever I spoke to him he just sort of awkwardly smiled and nodded. I thought he didn't like me, turns out he had no idea what I was saying, so I left notes for him instead... yeah," Y/N felt shy when she admitted this, covering her face.
"I remember back in trainee days, I was late for practice because I overslept. And then when I arrived I thought Channie hyung is really going to scold me but Y/N suddenly appeared, I think she came back from the bathroom or something but she said it was her fault that we were both late, and I thought phew, hyung won't be angry at me now, haha," Jeongin told his own story, remembering Y/N covering for him, and that wasn't the only time she had done that.
"I remember that! I knew she was covering up for you!" Chan gasped, pointing an accusing finger at Jeongin who laughed in response.
"She's so sweet and kind, whenever any of us would argue she'd try and stop it from happening," Hyunjin shook his head in wonder at how selfless Y/N was.
"Oh yeah! She'd try and get us to see from each perspective, even though I felt like I was right I thought wow I can't argue because now Y/N would be sad too if we carried on," Han covered his mouth slightly as he laughed, patting Hyunjin on the shoulder knowing that the argument he was referring to was definitely between the two of them.
"Right! Right! She's really good at seeing other people's feelings, but she used to struggle when it came to herself... She'd look so confused if I said to her that she was acting sad, she looked like a lost puppy..." Changbin said in a more serious tone.
"Oh when she had those puppy eyes! Yeah!" Chan nodded along enthusiastically, knowing the look all too well.
"It made my heart ache, she didn't understand, she's much better now though, I'll get a knock at my door and we'll talk for hours," Changbin confessed, feeling happy he was needed in helping his member feel better.
"Ah yes I talk to Binnie a lot about my feelings these days... I still find it confusing to understand how I feel but it makes a bit more sense when I talk with him, yeah..." Y/N began, still a bit shy in admitting when she needed help but better than she would have been before, "I don't think I look like a puppy? Seungmin is more like a puppy, haha."
"Remember Y/N used to have that part time job?" Seungmin asked the rest of the guys.
"Really?" Felix was shocked, not realising everything Y/N had to balance.
"Yeah she used to work at a cafe whilst training and school, I really admired that," Hyunjin grinned, proud of the younger girl.
"But she'd still have to ask us for money," Chan laughed.
"She'd spend it on her old friends! She wanted to make sure they were ok and then suddenly she wouldn't have any money left!" Seungmin said in disbelief, his voice cutely rising up and down in pitch showing how he was feeling.
"Oh, that makes sense I remember one time we got some boba, and she asked me like oppa, can you get me that please? And I asked her where her money went and she said she spent it on a present for Innie... I think it was near his birthday at the time," Lee Know commented, leaning back against the sofa.
"Woahh, my heart," Hyunjin gasped, placing a hand over his chest, "that's so cute!"
"Ah I love giving gifts! I feel like if I can find someone the perfect gift and they are happy then I'm really happy too," Y/N explained after a staff member asked her the question.
"I think I'm definitely different from debut days... If I could say anything about myself now... It would be... You have grown. Y/N has changed, but in a good way!"
"One Kid's Room, Y/N, finished!"
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
tagged: @skz-streamer @kiraisastay @hannahhbahng @kpopmenace143 @sakufilms @kai-lee08 @arloo00 @dunno-wut-to-do @splat00z @cheesemonky @his-angell @turtledove824 @2minstan @royal-shinigami @yangbbokari
2K notes · View notes
achilles-rage · 2 months ago
Text
Bad Thing Turned Even Better
Tumblr media
part one
summary: months after your encounter with buck at the bar, you confront him at his apartment about what he the hell that night was.
word count: 2.1k
a/n: y'all this is not the trope you think it is, i promise!! please don't click off when you read the first sentence of dialogue!! also, how the hell did a drabble prompt request turn into two parts?? i guess i'm just that feral over buck and hate fucking?? anyway, enjoy<3
warnings: mentions of previous smut (but no actual smut), talk about reader hating shitty men<3, no use of y/n, fem!reader, plus size!reader, race inclusive!reader
Tumblr media
It’s been a few months since you’ve last seen Buck at the bar, and you’ve been avoiding him ever since. 
You can’t exactly say that you regret it; he knew exactly what he was doing, but the more you thought about it, the more it pissed you off even more. Did he have to be so cocky, and smug, and overall infuriating? You can’t believe that you actually gave in to him, and then gave him the satisfaction of not seeing him for months, like some stupid one night stand. It’s probably exactly what he wanted to happen; to use you and throw you away like nothing.
Without thinking any further, you get dressed and make your way to Buck’s apartment with a frown etched onto your face. 
You pull into the parking lot haphazardly, barely putting the car in park before stomping up to his door, knuckles rapping harshly on the wood and your eyes narrowed. He’s in the middle of cooking dinner, so he drops his knife and makes his way to the front door, smirking when he looks through the peephole and sees you.
“I’m pregnant.” is all you say when he opens the door, pushing your way past him and into the apartment before he can react.
The smirk drops from his face as soon as the words register in his mind, and he turns on his heel as he closes the door, his brows furrowed in concern. 
“What?” Buck gets out, eyes travelling down your body, taking a moment to focus on your plush middle. He hates that possessiveness flares inside him at the thought; of you being claimed completely by him, as much as it scares the hell out of him.
“Okay, I’m not. But, did you even think about that possibility when you didn’t pull out?” you question, your arms crossed over your chest as you glare at Buck. You can see the sigh of relief he takes, but then almost immediately, the smirk is back on his face as he takes a step closer to you, eyeing you with a lustful gleam in his eyes.
“You didn’t think about it either, though, did you, sweetheart?” he questions, mirroring your stance and crossing his own arms, making his biceps flex against the tight sleeves of his t-shirt.
You clench your jaw at his accusation, because he’s right. When he was fucking you, all you could think about was him filling you up; you didn’t even have half of a mind to think about the possible implications of your actions.
“This isn’t about me. This is about you being completely reckless. You’re lucky I’m on the pill.” you finally say after a second too long, and he catches on to this. He tilts his head to the side, then takes another step closer to you, effectively closing the distance between the two of you and forcing you to tilt your head up to keep your narrowed eyes locked with his.
“Honestly, I think I would’ve done the exact same thing even if I knew you weren’t. And you wouldn’t have complained, either, would you?” he questions, running his tongue over the inside of his cheek as his eyes dart down to the way your arms push your tits up.
For a moment, you can’t even speak; you’re so angry and, you hate to admit, turned on, that all you can do is clench your jaw and stare up at him. 
Finally, you scoff, shaking your head once before standing up straighter, trying to get into his face.
“God, do you always have to be like this? The only person you think about is yourself!” He chuckles, raising his brows at your outburst, and he leans in even closer as his eyes dart from your lips to your eyes, letting you feel his breath against your skin.
He loves your feisty side. It’s never been something he’s necessarily gravitated towards, but you just look so good when you’re pissed off at him. He’s not exactly sure why you hate him so much, but he does know that he loves to see that look in your eyes. Almost as much as he loves how easy it is to fuck the attitude out of you.
“Actually, I was thinking about you. Being completely mine.” he says in a low, smooth voice, tilting his head further to the side as his eyes narrow slightly.
Your throat goes dry at his words, but you keep your gaze stoic, eyes searching his for a moment as you try not to let the butterflies deep in your belly rise to the surface. You’d love for him to actually mean it, but why would he, you think? You’ve seen the type of women guys like him go for; thin, model-like figure, and absolutely gorgeous. You know you’re pretty, but you know not to get your hopes up with men like him.
“What are you trying to do here?” you finally say, now less angry, and more exhausted. You’ve spent so long hating Buck, and you’re getting sort of sick of having your guard up when he’s around, which is quite frequently with him being in your friend group.
“I think it’s obvious.” he says, the corners of his mouth turning down as he shrugs. You scoff, rolling your eyes. Why does he insist on continuing to toy with you?
“What are you really trying to do? Because we both know it isn’t that.” you ask again, letting your arms fall to your sides. 
“Why are you so sure it’s not?” he questions as his smirk slowly falls. He can see that you’re at your wits end, so he uncrosses his arms as well, letting a sincere look make its way onto his face as he puts his hands on his hips.
“Because I know you! I know guys like you!” you practically yell, throwing your arms up in the air as if it’s obvious. You let out a sigh once you see his brows furrow in confusion, turning and taking a step back as you collect your thoughts for a second without him so close.
“You’re smug, and you’re arrogant, and you’re only nice to people that you think are attractive enough to deserve your attention, which by the way, isn’t all that special of a thing.” you list off, counting each thing on your fingers as you move to stand in front of him again. 
He still looks confused, and you’re not sure if you’re more angry or frustrated at this point. Now that you say it out loud, you feel a little silly, but it’s still what you believe; it’s what you’ve been proven many times in your life.
“Have I done anything to prove to you that I’m like that?” he questions, ducking his head down to better match your height. He brings one of his hands up to your arm in a way to comfort you, because he’s unsure of what else to do. Now that he knows why you don’t like him, he’s confused, and a little upset you think so little of him.
“You didn’t have to. I’ve known enough guys like you.” you say, shrugging away from his grip and taking a step back. You force yourself to look away from him; if you don’t, you’re sure you’ll just end up doing something stupid. Now that he’s not being so confident and cocky, all you want to do is kiss him again.
“Well, maybe that’s the problem. I’ve only ever been nice to you, and you’re acting like this because different guys have treated you like shit.” he tries to reason, wanting more than anything to close the distance between you again. He feels that surge of possessiveness fill his belly again at the thought of men in your past treating you badly enough to turn you into this. It’s cute, and he loves it, but he also feels his blood boiling as he thinks about you having to act like this in order to protect yourself from men.
“Come on, you’re too hot to not be like that. You’re just better at hiding it.” you say, mostly talking to yourself as you look up at him.
“So, you think I’m hot?” he says, the usual smirk making its way back onto his face. He’s not sure how else to show you that he wants you; he’s flirted with you for months. He fucked you for God’s sake, and you still think he’s not being serious.
“Do you always have to be like this? You were finally being a normal person.” you say, letting out an incredulous laugh, fighting back a smile as you look away.
He grabs your chin before your face is hidden from him, though, and he brings your face back up to his, letting his eyes study your face for a moment.
“You’re beautiful.” he murmurs as his eyes dart back up to yours. You feel heat rising to your cheeks at the sincerity behind his words, and the smile finally makes its way onto your face.
He can’t help but smile when you do, loving the sight. He’s sure now that he’d rather see you like this than like you were before.
“Stop.” you whisper, voice cracking and barely audible as butterflies swarm your tummy. He just chuckles quietly, grabbing your hip with his other hand and pulling you into him.
“No.” he whispers back before leaning down, his lips meeting yours in a dizzying kiss. He can feel your plush body against his front, and he hums softly, tilting your head further up into the kiss before his hand moves from your chin to the side of your neck and holds you in place.
He’s tempted to pick you up and bring you upstairs to his bed, but he knows he should take things slower than he did at the bar, as amazing as that night was. He keeps his movements slow, letting his tongue slip into your mouth when you part your lips, and runs his thumb over the sensitive skin on your neck as he holds you flush against him. 
After a minute or two, you try to deepen the kiss, raising onto your toes and grabbing the front of his shirt as your lips speed up, but he pulls back an inch, mumbling “slower” against your lips.
You try to do as he says, but your knees feel weak. Your head is spinning with how he’s kissing you, and all you want is more of him. He has to remind you a few times to slow down before you finally pull back breathlessly, your pupils blown and lips swollen as you look up at him with a pleading look in your eyes.
“Do you believe me now?” he asks softly, keeping you pressed tight against him as his hand moves up your side comfortingly.
You blink slowly, barely even remembering your own name as you stare into his eyes. You can’t even remember what you were talking about before he kissed you, so all you say is a gentle “what?”
“Do you believe that I want you now?” he clarifies, unable to resist the urge to lean down and give you a chaste kiss as your brows remain knit together in confusion.
“That depends.” you say, a small smile making its way onto your face as you shrug.
“On what?” he asks with a smile, his own brows furrowing. He thought the kiss finally got his feelings for you into your head, but now it doesn’t seem so.
“You have enough for two?” you tease, looking over to the kitchen where his half-cooked meal is sitting. He chuckles with a shake of his head. You’re going to be the death of him.
“Absolutely.” he purrs, pulling you impossibly closer, and you laugh softly, nodding.
“Good.” you say, then push him away and make your way over to the kitchen, looking over the ingredients spread across the counter. 
He stays in his spot for a moment, watching the way your hips sway, and he smiles to himself at how content you finally seem in his presence. You’re quick to make yourself at home in his apartment, and it makes his chest fill with pride that he’s finally broken through your walls.
Tumblr media
notes: likes/comments/reblogs would be much appreciated if you liked this<33
click here for my masterlist!
click here to be added to my taglist!
click here to read my request rules!
taglist: @officiallyalbino @wanniiieeee @dreams-encapsulated-in-glamour @buckandeddiesverison @catkight @tatyhend @emilysuperswag @kulteule @korosevren @nyx3028 @sporadicmakerwerewolf @sherlocksbaby2323 @essienoe @p14th0mps0n @celestixldarling @brooke0297 @zelfanswhenshecan @avengersgirllorianna @bingbongsupremacy @nishinoyahhh @alyssanicole01 @outof-spite @supernatural-bangtanboys @x0xchristine @pear-1206 @swanshells @tpwkstiles @lulubelle14 @cannibalhellhound @odetolocksmiths @rafecameronsloverrrrr @charlie-winchester94 @hollandxxmix @evysian @starbyun92939798 @maxinish @uhmidkmuch @theking-mustdie @daeswash @911varietyposts @superlock-in-the-tardis @lilsquatch7898 @hufflepuff-spidey @starboygf @wnbweasley @damndirtylitch @eva-tts5 @alexxavicry @sammiejane22 @boybandbaby (if you interacted with my taglist post and are not on this list, make sure your blog is visible in searches or i can’t tag you!)
184 notes · View notes