#he 100% eats some of the fries when no one's watching

[emotionalsupportgoblin420]

The reference photo

I just imagine Haru laughing his ass off while taking this picture 🤣

[lostinlovingrevery]

"You know how animals have displays to attract mates? Logan is no different. When hes in the mood, hell puff himself out to you, do things he thinks youll like. I mean, i suppose avg males do this too but logan gets repetitive over it until you notice. "

This is too cute 🥹 Could I maybe request a drabble based off this? (Sorry if you already got a message similar to this, my wifi is being weird and I can't tell if it actually sent lol)

A/N: Thank you for this ask!! Aren't drabbles supposed to be 100 words? IDK, but this is more of cute fanfic with 1400+ word count! I hope this is what you wanted!

I imagined a F!Reader but I didn't use any pronouns or describe readers body so it could be GN!

I pictured trilogy! Logan too bc I felt like he was the one most likely to act like this honestly LOL. I tried to use the 4 things you'd see when it comes to mating displays - Looks, Strength, Food, and Gifts. (I just kept picturing him like those birds from birds of paradise video)

Courtship Rituals

Warnings: Just Logan being needy ;), Suggestive ending ;) ;)

It’s been an extremely busy day. 

Aside from the meetings, the classes, chores, and various other activities that had taken up the schedule, it left little time for you to be with Logan. 

Which he was totally fine with by the way. He knew you were busy. 

Still, he’d stop by your study. “You done yet bub?” he’d ask, as he put his palms on your desk, seemingly puffing out his chest, the muscles of his arms bulging out as if he were flexing them. It was hard for you to not get distracted by him, especially since he was wearing a white t-shirt that fit very tightly around his torso; You swore you could make out his pecs through them. He actually looked really good since you’ve seen him early this morning- still asleep in bed. His hair looked especially good today, and he trimmed his beard to look a little neater. Not to mention he had on those jeans that fit his ass snuggly - the ones that you can never stop staring at. 

God he’s so hot

You couldn’t allow yourself to be distracted though- Charles absolutely needed you to finish some research by tonight, so you couldn’t stop. 

“Sorry baby,” You said sympathetically, “It’s gonna be a bit. I’m busy today y’know?” 

You felt so guilty the way he visibly deflated, you reached out to grab his hand. “Later, ok?” You kissed the space between his knuckles, and he forced a smile, before leaving you alone to do your work. 

Later you were in your classroom, getting things set up and preparing for your next class as you write your lesson plan on the chalkboard, you happened to turn your head to the window- where Logan was conveniently outside your classroom window in the yard, working out with nothing but his sweatpants on and his shirt off. You could see the sweat glistening off his skin, once again- you felt an incredible urge to go be with him, but you couldn’t- since your next class is in 20 minutes. 

You went to the window and watched him, where he spotted you eventually after he finished doing a set of pushups- you lost count at 50. He greeted you with a small wave of his hand, a smirk plastered on his face. You gave him a polite wave back, and blew a kiss to him. He waved for you to come out, but you shook your head- tapping your wrists and pointing to the classroom with your thumb. He shrugged, and nodded understandingly- but deflated once again. 

During lunch, you stopped into the kitchen to grab something to eat, finding Logan in there already. He looked up at the sound of you entering, and smiled. 

“Was just about to get you. Made you lunch.” He says, turning around and presenting the plate- one of your favorite lunches. Grilled cheese (Extra cheesy of course with 3 different types of cheeses) Homemade fries with sea salt, and a small cup of tomato soup. Your stomach growled loudly.

“Lo!” You smiled taking the plate, “That’s so sweet, thank you-” You reached down to take a bite of a fry, your eyes rolled back and groaned dramatically. “Oh that’s SO good.” You reached up to peck him on the lips, as he smiled proudly down at you. He figured, if his impressive muscles and body weren’t enough to sway you away from your work - then this would.

The way to anyone's heart - food. 

“You done for the day? Maybe we could spend some time-”

“Professor!” 

The sound of Rogues voice came into the room, distracting you and Logan. “Hi, sorry- you said you would help me out with my science project?” She asks you, you swallowed your fry and nodded. 

“I did, just give me a moment-” You inform her, turning back to Logan who’s deadpan expression made you want to laugh. “Sorry sweetheart, later?” You ask, pecking his lips again with a loud smooch.

“Yeah, sure.” He nods, his very best to not show his disappointment, watching you walk away with Rogue- and the plate of food in your hands. 

You were talking to Jean in the hall, complaining about all the work you had to do. Some of it your fault- stuff you had been procrastinating, but some of it just piled on suddenly. Not to mention it was your turn on the roster to cook everyone dinner, and you had tons of laundry to do- another thing you put off. 

Logan came around the corner, his arm sliding across your waist as he kissed your cheek. “Hey sweetheart.” He says lowly to you in that deep timber voice that drives you crazy- and he knows it too. He gave a courteous nod to Jean. 

“What you got there Logan?” Jean asks, noticing he was holding something behind his back. He pulled his arm from his back, revealing to you a bouquet of wildflowers. You gasped.

“Lo, these are beautiful!” You smiled taking them. Jean chuckled, 

“I’ll leave you lovebirds alone.” She teased, turning and walking away, leaving you and Logan alone. He braced an elbow against the wall looking down at you as you admired and sniffed the wildflowers. 

“Thought you’d like them.” He says. You beamed up at him, leaning up on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek. “I was thinking…” His other hand went to your hip, as he straightened his back out- practically towering over you. “If you got some free time now we should-”

“Hey! You busy?” Scott interrupted, pointing at you, then noticing the flowers, and Logans demeanor over you. Not to mention the absolute scowl Logan was giving him. “Uh, nevermind-”

You laughed, playfully hitting Logans arm. “What do you need Scott?” 

Logan let out an exasperated sigh. He loved you, but boy do you always jump at the chance to help someone out… Guess that’s why he loved you. You were always great at lending a hand. You, however, have been terrible at picking up signals. He dropped his arm from the wall, stepping back to give you space. Tuning Scotts annoying voice out and looking down at you with adoration. It wasn’t just the sex that he was wanting- he was just feeling needy for you today, but you were too busy and had a lot on your plate.

He took the bouquet from you, telling you he’ll put them in a vase while Scott stole you away from him. Rejected twice, and stolen away from him twice. It did not boost his ego. 

Finally, the evening came, and you were in bed, relaxing with a book. You had changed out of your clothes and into Logan's shirt, while Logan was in the shower, the steam and scent of soap wafting through the bathroom door of your shared bedroom. You heard the tap turn off, and you closed your book, setting it on your bedside table- next to the vase of flowers he got you- as you waited for him. 

He came out, towel wrapped low on his hips, droplets of water dripping down his hairy chest and torso, and he looked surprised to see you in bed. “Oh, hey.” He greets. “Didn’t know you when you’d be back.” He mutters under his breath.

“Came in just as you got in the shower.” You smiled, tilting your head and crossing your arms, noticing his slight attitude. He nodded, turning to pull out some clothes. “Logan.” You called out, and he turned his head. You brought your hand up and beckoned him with your finger. 

His grumpy face disappeared and he smiled, turning back to you and walking to the bed, dropping the towel to the floor as he kneeled onto the bed and climbed between your legs, his arms wrapping around your waist and upper back. 

You brought your hands up into his hair, intertwining your fingers through the wet locks and you giggled. “You were missing me today weren’t you?” You smiled. His expression went soft, the corners of his eyes crinkling as his lips upturned to a small smile. 

“Yeah. I was.” He says softly. 

“You were like a peacock. You were totally strutting your stuff around me.” You teased. He rolled his eyes. 

“Didn’t work clearly.” He mutters. 

“So you admit it!” You laughed. “Cause since when did you work out outside my classroom window?”

A deep blush came across his face as he became embarrassed, looking away, before looking up at you with big pleading eyes. You hummed, leaning forward and giving him a soft kiss that he quickly deepened, pressing himself deeper against your body.

Parting with a gasp, you ran your thumb across his cheek. “For the record, I missed you too.”

[nerdlvr]

jisung knew that something was wrong with you since the moment you stepped foot in front of him. don't get him wrong, you're 100% his type, hot. but he could tell that behind that smart ass mouth, something something was off about you. he felt like he had seen this behavior somewhere he just couldn't quite put his finger on it.

.

when you had come out of your dorm building he had leaned in for a hug, typical greeting, and you just walked right past him a loud come on leaving you lips as you walked towards the parking lot. maybe you just hadn't seen him.

.

in the car he had reached over to grab your thigh as the traffic light turned red, to which you immediately slapped his hand away with your purse before throwing him a dirty look,

"watch your hands park jisung."

okay fair enough. maybe he was getting a little handsy too soon.

.

as you both sat in burger king, a nervous chuckle escaping his lips as you glared holes through his head, he playfully picked up a french fry pressing it to your lips so you'd eat. his mouth hung open as he watched the fry fly out of his hand onto the floor. you bent down to pick up the fried potato from the floor a small laugh leaving your lips,

"ha, sorry, saw a fly on it."

hm, wouldn't want you eating a fly right?

.

it was about time he dropped you off, jeno's voice ringing in his head, do not sleep with her park jisung. so instead he opted for a small kiss. you'd think for 50 bucks an hour and free dates you'd at least give him a peck. so as you both stood in the lobby of your dorm he did what any guy would do, lean in. and you did what no girl has ever done to him, you pushed him away leaning back with an awkward smile on your face,

"okayyy now, i think that's enough for tonight, have a good night alright?"

but as you turned around to leave jisung couldn't help the confusion that filled him, reaching forward to grab your shoulder, turning you to face him.

"jisung? what is it?"

"what do you mean what is it? what is wrong with you?"

he watched as your eyebrows creased,

"what is wrong with me? are you actually acting out cause i won't kiss you goodnight? what are you a toddler?"

jisung let out a dry laugh raising his hands in defense,

"ohhh so you think this is cause of the kiss?"

you nodded as he let out a sigh, why are you such a-

"you've been great y/n! I even like your bratty attitude! and wow you're also super hot too! it's like you're the full package, but oh my god what is wrong with you?"

you blinked slowly as you waited for him to continue, where was he going with this?

"you think i haven't noticed? i try to give you a hug, oh okay you're walking the other way. i try to touch your thigh, alright maybe that was too much on my part. i try to feed you a fry, suddenly there's an invisible fly. you even pretended to need two hands to hold that flimsy ass bouquet i got you!"

you gulped,

"i just-"

you waved your hands around trying to find an excuse.

"you just what y/n? you're supposed to act like my girlfriend. what are you some lame ass virgin? you act like you've never even sat next to a man!"

you bit the inside of your cheek as you fidgeted from one foot to another, looking down at your shoes.

"wait-"

you felt his hand on your chin, bringing your head up to look at him. you tried your best to not flinch away from his touch, holding your breath.

"y/n have you actually never touched a guy?"

you slapped his hand away, taking a deep breath,

"so what? is it so bad that not all of us are whores like you?”

he let out a scoff,

“whore? at least i’m not a twenty something year old virgin! do you even touch yourself?”

“park jisung! you- that’s none of your business! you’re the one paying for a girlfriend! who’s the real loser?”

he gave you a look saying okay but you’re still a virgin.

“whatever! thanks for the- the burger! get home safe! i’ll be expecting some form of payment for our first couple argument!”

you rushed away from him not even sparing him a glance as you furiously pressed on the elevator button. he just watched as you left no longer finding the words to describe his shock.

no way he bagged himself a virgin.

ᡣ𐭩 ｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅rent-a-girlfriend.com ~ 5. something is off...

previous ~ masterlist ~ next

notes : i just love writing fuckboys with dumb ass ideas. unlike the mark one this dumbass plan is just adding to the plot it won't be the major issue in the smau... guys in the chat write one k-idol that you wouldn't mind being a villain LMAOOOO

taglist : @bunniin , @neverbeurs , @fakeuwus , @girlz4jaem , @222brainrot , @mystverse , @sk8mrk , @ksywoo , @snowyseungs , @nislost , @nosungluv , @jae-n0 , @peterm4rker , @livingdoll-hara , @doejaejung , @tommina , @413ktz , @aerivrs , @cyjzzl , @dolleyedgirl , @nneteyamss , @mrkleelvr , @4chensungs , @nctrawberries , @multifandomania , @catpjimin , @dudekiss3r , @lvrholic , @yuujiswrld , @slayhaechan , @catdonut657 , @kodasity , @prettybluei , @ohwowzersthatscool , @byeonwooseokabs , @m1ng1swife , @hyucksunset , @rksbae , @hyucktion , @lionzyon , @baobeii55 , @jakesbubu , @axo-l0tl , @sunghoonsgfreal , @strawberrysavi , @hyunjungjae , @xyzsiissnnsnsjs , @kookssecret , @babrieeee , @defzcl

[stellaaarree]

some atsv characters with a reader that dresses bimbo, w/ the makeup and nails ect :)

MIGUEL

instantly your gonna get called “diva”.

loves the opposites looks though

he pays for all your expensive mini skirts.

insert miguel’s shocked face. “mi amor?! this skirt is the size of a belt! £35 for a piece of stripped fabric?? dios mío.” he groans, swiping his card at the register.

will just lean in the door way watching you do your makeup. loves it nowhere near as much as your natural face but if you’re happy hes ecstatic (secretly. we all know he has to keep the badass exterior.)

occasionally pulls your skirt down a little so it’s covering more. that place is only for him to see >:(!

sugar daddy vibes. dropping you off at the nail salon and picking you up all fancy with your starbucks order in hand😚😚

MILES

is way too scared to touch you in fear of messing up your pretty hair or makeup.

ADORES EVERYTHING.

something about you getting cold in your skimpy pink outfit and his black hoodie is going over your shoulder gets him giggling. everyone knows it’d have to be his.

asks his parents for money so he can pay for your nails😭😭

you assure him that he doesn’t have to pay and when he’s not allowed money he’s the one that swipes your card so it looks like its his. delusional king.

will 100% have your starbucks order memorised and when he hears you say for the first time just pauses with a “…how did you say all of that in the span of ten seconds?..”

brags 100%. if he has his other friends round his place and you’ve left one of your bright pink shirts there will go, “oh! sorry guys don’t mind the pink shirt over there.” knowing damn well he doesn’t wear pink..nor baby tees.

GWEN

you’re the reason she dyed the ends of her hair pink. always has a bit of your sweetness around🫶🏻

shopping sprees!!! then after y’all go to mcdonalds and she’s tucking napkins over your shirt so the sauce doesn’t ruin it.

feeding you fries so your lipstick doesn’t smudge.

genuinely just loves to be up close with you.

she’s taking out your perfectly clipped and bumped up hair at the end of the day. being oh so gentle as your head falls asleep by her shoulder.

when you go to her place she empties out all the things she feels you’d like from her closet and now you have your own drawer. spare makeup, hair clips, a mini straightener and her brightly coloured hoodies and jumpers.

y’all share socks. shut up its cute!!!!!!!

she’s got ones with stars scattered on them and you’ve got hearts on yours.

HOBIE

as we’ve noted, he doesn’t believe in consistency so the stark contrast between you two is adorable.

always holding your hand, thumb going over the 3d details on your nails.or he’s straight up staring at the glittery gloss as you talk while making hand gestures.

‘darlin’ and doll’ are now your new names.

you give him hair inspo and he gives you hair inspo😭😭

has a special pink guitar pic that he uses when you’re around!!!!

absolutely enamoured with your nails, you know the questions coming. the dreaded question.

when y’all are comfy, cuddling he speaks the dreaded moment. “doll, …how’d you wipe your arse with those.” and the cute moment is ruined. you obviously where not gonna share your struggles so you hit him back with the “girls don’t poop, idiot.”

PETER B PARKER

when you babysit mayday she always comes back with painted nails + toes. peter always having the same question. “how’d you get her to stay still for that long?!” with a smile you reply. “she makes exceptions for her favourite.”

if you guys are eating and sauce or something gets on your painted lips, he doesn’t even mention it. just straight away wiping it off and going back to the conversation at hand.

is the main funder for your clothes.

miguel and him fight over it all the time. miguel’s usual comeback “spoil your own kid! this ones mine!” and peter rolling his eyes.

peters the kinda guy to fund your usual things. his price range going from £5 - £25. as it happens more oftens.

miguels on the other hand. £35 - £200. and it obviously is a rare occasion.

to give extra thanks to peter you’d kiss his cheek. leaving a pink kiss stain behind and him proudly showing it off.

obsessed with the style. he’s a pretty chill guy so when asking you to come down to the store with him and you walk out in full glam, plans change. “yeah, no, we’re going to dinner instead. cmon pretty.” there was no option that was an order😭

you guys ended up stealing the pink coasters at the restaurant.

BONUS!! you’re maydays personal stylist. nails, done, hair? done, needing an outfit? done. and she sits still and pretty the whole time. completely shocking everyone else how you’ve kept her quiet. she just focuses on your pretty glittered eyelids as your big fluffy lashes bat at her sweetly🫶🏻🫶🏻

you after atsv spoils you rotten😭😭

[i-smoke-chapstick]

Okay so like as I’m writing this, tomorrow is my birthday (I’m gonna be 19 😭) and I was wondering if I could get some birthday headcanons with the legion of horribles (poly but platonic) + (separately) zsasz?🥺

You don’t have to finish this on my birthday so I understand if it will take time but if you can do it that would be wonderful! Don’t feel pressured though!

Thank you so much Cupid!^^🫂

'400 LUX,

-GOTHAM!VILLIANS X READER-

⋆ Characters ↬ Oswald Cobblepot, Jerome Valeska, Bridgit Pike, Jervis Tetch, Jonathan Crane, Victor Fries, Victor Zsasz

⋆ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 ; Birthday HCs with the Legion of Horribles! (+ romantic zsasz)

⋆ tags/warnings. GOTHAM!villains x female reader. PURE FLUFF! They adore reader so so so much! Reader turning 19 :> Age gap for Zsasz! All seven of these idiots. Good luck reader, you will need it!! Suggestive parts in Zsasz's. Reader probably drinking too much tea to be healthy. Also sorry I'm a little late with this, hectic week but happy late bday adal <3 love ya!

𝛰𝑆𝑊𝐴𝐿𝐷 𝐶𝛰𝐵𝐵𝐿𝐸𝑃𝛰𝑇

♫ “We're never done with killing time, can I kill it with you?” 400 Lux by Lorde

Number one spoiler!

No seriously, good luck. You are basically Martin #2. He's buying the most extravagant gifts, and hosting the birthday party. He's getting mad at Jervis and Jerome (anyone who can't keep there mouth shut for the surprise.)

Hectically organizing this whole mess. To his best ability. Eventually he gives up under the stress and you'll notice. Just have a little sit down with him, and he'll HAPPILY celebrate your birthday far away from everyone else.

Once you two have a minute alone, he's making you his mothers tea, telling you all about his birthdays and how she used to celebrate them with him. He really just wants to make this the best day for you possible.

Have a small little laugh with him on the couch, look at baby pictures of him around the mansion, watch him get red in the face and scowl just a teeny tiny bit.

He'll also scroll through your phone (he's horrible with technology) and look at your baby pictures too. You two end up having a good laugh and a semi-serious talk about childhood memories <3

He'll end up giving you his most personal gift when you two are alone, away from the "cretins outside" in his words.

𝐽𝐸𝑅𝛰𝑀𝐸 𝑉𝐴𝐿𝐸𝑆𝐾𝐴

♫ “We might be hollow but we're brave.” 400 Lux by Lorde

The only time he's 100 percent serious is when he's busy with the sheer EFFORT he's putting into this celebration.

Him and Oswald have conflicting ideas. Oswald wants something extravagant, royal, fit for you, like a coming of age. Jerome still wants to throw you a ball, but more like a child's dream chucky-cheese type birthday.

What do you mean he can't get a bunch of arcade machines and a ball pit delivered to the mansion? He's pouting.

He'll be DAMNED if he doesn't book the entertainment and a GIANT cake, though.

Will get Jervis to hypnotize some poor sap to dance for you. You know, if you're into that. Might kill him too if you're a little evil like him. If you aren't into that, he'll let him live. That's your gift :>

Did i say a GIANT cake? Yeah. It's massive. FUCKING MASSIVE. He probably ends up eating more of it then you guys, to be honest.

Makes sure it's your favorite flavor too.

Makes everyone sit down when it's time for cake and candles, if anyone tries to get up he's screaming at the top of his lungs.

Remember that "USE THE TONGS, CARL!" Yeah, he's channeling that energy to the hypnotized people cutting the cake and setting the table.

Fully looks at you like a successor (and like, his only real friend) so he's a bit pushy for this to go well. Not as much as Oswald, but still set on making this a good day for you. He just isn't as overt.

𝐵𝑅𝐼𝐷𝐺𝐼𝑇 𝑃𝐼𝐾𝐸

♫ “And the heating comes on.” 400 Lux by Lorde

Poor baby has never seen, attended, or had a birthday party in her life. It's new for her, it's intriguing. She loves this little strange family you guys have created.

You are LITERALLY her little sister, the only sibling she truly sees as her own!

It's obligatory for her to light the birthday candles (and almost burn the mansion down, chaos ensues)

Similar to Oswald, she gives you one intimate gift. Something she knows you'll love, something personal. You're favorite flowers, gems, or even a nod to an inside joke.

Arguing with Victor (Fries) about who has the better gift and who you like more.

When the day is nearing it's end, she volunteers to clean up to have some time alone with you. Everyone else is winding down, but you and her will get to talk like two best friends.

It's the only time she feels like a normal teenage girl. Just gossiping with you while putting Jerome's confetti in trash bags.

You'll probably have a little slumber party with her in the living room, eating left-over snacks and watching TV, throwing popcorn at each other. Speaking of popcorn....

"Hey, watch this!" She's nudging you, getting you to watch her make her own popcorn kernels with her flamethrower, signature smile on her face :>

𝐽𝐸𝑅𝑉𝐼𝑆 𝑇𝐸𝑇𝐶𝐻

♫ “You drape your wrists over the steering wheel.” 400 Lux by Lorde

He was fighting tooth and nail for this to be a tea party. Still upset it's not. Ended up still hypnotizing someone to make tea for you all. Ah, Small victories.

Also? We saw him in that chauffer outfit. He will gladly be the designated driver.

Similar to the rest of them, he wants some time alone with you. So, he's hypnotizing a limo and pulling up and practically stealing you away.

Takes you on a little shopping spree. Anywhere you want to go, he'll take you there! Even if he doesn't particularly enjoy it. (cough cough, convince stores, cough cough)

Wants to take you to the tea shoppes and bakeries.

He is LITERALLY the most BUSY bee out of EVERYONE. Everyone is so obsessed with planning and whatnot, but he actually has to do EVERYTHING by himself.

Whose hypnotizing the cake maker, the gifts, the decorations, the people, the waiters? Ah, the list goes on and on. He's a bit tuckered out by the time you too are done shopping and he's off his list of errands.

Have a cup of tea with him after <3 he will be infinitely grateful to wind down with you if you find the time during the day.

Sings happy birthday obnoxiously loud for you. He also insists everyone has perfect table manners and etiquette. (Looking at you, Jerome.)

𝐽𝛰𝑁𝐴𝑇𝐻𝐴𝑁 𝐶𝑅𝐴𝑁𝐸

♫ “I can tell that you're tired.” 400 Lux by Lorde

Silent, for the most part. Will refuse to sing happy birthday, and will truly only participate if it's the two of you alone. He...doesn't work well in groups.

He's getting a slap on the wrist from everyone because of it.

He'd MUCH rather steal you away periodically through the day, to just talk to you about your childhood. Congratulate you. He's happy for you, but he's a little scared you're getting older.

Very protective. Always. No matter what.

You might hear him laugh a bit, joke around with you, just simply checking the surroundings and chaos from Jerome.

If you are someone who prefers things more lowkey, you'll find yourself spending the majority of the day with Jonathan. Eventually you two will just pass by each other every now and then, and share a brief respite from the bustling outside.

You are TRULY his best friend. He wants to make this day as good for you as everyone else does. He just doesn't know where to start.

He'll probably end up giving you your favorite gift out of EVERYONE.

Doesn't matter what it is. He'll know. It will be intimate, genuine, and a very heartfelt message on the bottom of a card attached.

"Love you, Y/N." -Jonathan

Okay, not SUPER heartfelt at first look, but for him? It's as close as you'll get to him being vulnerable.

𝑉𝐼𝐶𝑇𝛰𝑅 𝐹𝑅𝐼𝐸𝑆

♫ “We're getting good at this.” 400 Lux by Lorde

Jerome puts him on ice-cream duty and he's reasonably grumpy.

No, but genuinely, this is a VERY special day for him. He's a VERY proud dad!

Always wanted to have kids with Nora. Never got a chance. You really are his second chance at happiness, and he loves you so much. He gets to live out everything he thought he'd never be able too.

Wants to get more involved, but gets a little pushed out between Jerome and Oz.

Jerome probably makes him make ice sculptures. Or Ozzie asks him to freeze the body of your enemies. Perfect gift!

Similar to Jonathan, likes to keep things more lowkey. He'll sneak in a pseudo father daughter bonding moment, even if you don't know.

"So, uh, you're staying out trouble, right?"

He's asking, nudging you when you two finally get a moment alone. His voice comes out in a mumble, obviously not very experienced in this role of being a father. But he can't help it.

Overprotective dad scowling at Zsasz, you know, to get the point across. Zsasz staring riiiiiiight back.

"Just so you know...if you break her heart, I'm freezing yours." Victor #1 says, with a clicking sound, and a raise of his gun.

Victor #2 raises a non-existent eyebrow, and lifts his own gun in return. "Of course..." He drawls. The idle threats are there.

𝑉𝐼𝐶𝑇𝛰𝑅 𝑍𝑆𝐴𝑆𝑍

♫ “You pick me up and take me home again / We're hollow like the bottles that we drain.” 400 Lux by Lorde

He's a loving boyfriend, you just have to get through his layers throughout the day!

Of course, he's your ride to and from the mansion. Driving with him, his hand on your thigh, disco music. Waking you up with kisses and birthday sex

He's grumbling just a bit everyone else wants to steal you away. Que him being a sassy boyfriend, rolling his eyes.

He ends up just standing around the mansion most of the day, sneaking bites of pastries or making idle conversation with the terrified waiters, while you are out with Jervis. He doesn't mind. It's your day. He is more then happy, this is his element. A whole day dedicated to his girl, and free food? Sign him up.

In contrast to everyone, he's the only person to give you a gag gift. Surprisingly, Jerome takes this too seriously to give you one. Victor doesn't, though. He'll give you a whole bunch of small gag gifts, just to see that beautiful smile on your face.

He'll end up getting you a real gift though. Something precious, gorgeous, elegant. Something absolutely killer. Black onyx necklace? Yes. You'll feel the leather of his gloves on your neck while he puts it on you.

Doesn't care if ANYONE looks at the two of you weirdly for the age gap. In fact, he'll become even MORE affectionate. Y'know, just to piss people off.

Speaking of age, he doesn't care you aren't 21 just yet. He's 100% sneaking the two of you some alcohol to drink. (Not without teasing you, of course, for being a downright horrible criminal!)

Oswald, Victor Fries, and Jervis don't appreciate you drinking. They are too protective. But Zsasz doesn't gaf what they say :>

[rottenpumpkin13]

Shinra Floor New Year’s party from hell pretty plz? 🥺

The New Year's Resolution Challenge

• Sephiroth and Genesis arrive at the ballroom. Both of them are dressed in the exact same blue suit.

Sephiroth: Happy new year, director.

• Lazard doesn't reply. He takes one look at them, spits out his drink and starts laughing.

Genesis: Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want. We didn't coordinate this, you know!

Lazard: You look like two penguins—

Sephiroth: We coincidentally had the same suit and chose to wear it tonight.

Genesis: And we could not decide who got to wear it, so we gave up trying to settle the issue.

• Rufus Shinra walks by also wearing the same suit. Lazard absolutely loses his shit.

• Reno and Rude swing by, both with cameras and starts taking pictures of the trio. The camera flash is so strong, Sephiroth is blinded and topples onto Genesis. The two start squabbling on the floor. Reno takes more pictures.

• Lazard watches all of this go down. He looks at his drink sadly.

Lazard: I'm going to need something stronger.

• Later, Zack and Angeal are arguing as they walk up to the table.

Zack: You're so pessimistic!

Angeal: No, I'm not. I just think making "eat healthier" your new year's resolution when your favorite food is a deep-fried donut bacon sandwich is useless.

Genesis: What are you two on about?

Zack: Angeal doesn't think I can keep my new year's resolution! I want to eat healthier food. *he takes a bite out of his fifteenth slider*

Genesis: And I want a robot who slaps Sephiroth on command. Doesn't look like either of us are getting our wish.

Sephiroth: Zack, if you want to keep your new year's resolution, why don't you start tonight? That way, you can assess how well you'll be able to keep it.

Zack: You know what? You're right! *he throws his slider over his shoulder⏤it hits Heidegger on the back of his head* I'm starting now! From now on, no more junk food! I'm a changed ma⏤wait, look! They just brought out the cake!

Sephiroth: Zackary.

Zack: Fine, fine. You're right! I don't need cake!

Angeal: Actually, that's a great idea. Why don't we all start our new year's resolutions tonight?

Genesis: Oh-ho! Do I hear a challenge? The loser who can't keep his resolution until midnight owes everyone else G$1000.

Angeal: The only reason you're so keen on putting money in this is because you don't have a new year's resolution.

Genesis: How can I be any better than I am now?

*Everyone starts talking over each other giving suggestions*

Genesis: Okay OKAY I get it! Goddess!

Sephiroth: My new year's resolution is to be more approachable and friendlier.

Angeal: Mine is to not get stressed out too easily.

Genesis: And I'll take a vow of silence! One whole night without quoting Loveless nor speaking at all⏤

Sephiroth: FINALLY.

*Everyone looks at him*

Sephiroth: I mean *clears his throat* That sounds like a wonderful idea.

• Later, Zack and Angeal are hanging around the buffet table. Angeal is admiring the fruit display (mostly the pyramid of Banora Whites) while Zack looks longingly at the mini hotdogs.

Angeal: Why don't you have some fruit? Zack: Good idea!

• Zack reaches for one of the dumbapples at the bottom of the pyramid. Immediately the display crumbles and crashes to the ground. Over 100 apples roll around all over the place. Angeal goes red in the face and opens his mouth to scold Zack.

Zack: Ah-ah! You can't get mad at me!

*Angeal's eye twitches*

• Meanwhile, Genesis and Sephiroth are walking around the party. Genesis is silently reading his book, trying his best not to talk. They approach Kunsel and a few other SOLDIERs. Sephiroth grins big and wide.

• The SOLDIERs scream and run away.

Sephiroth: What's wrong with my smile? *Genesis opens his mouth to respond, but then the realization dawns on him. He clamps it shut again*

Sephiroth: Hm. I bet you're dying to make fun of me.

Genesis:

Sephiroth: If only someone would point out every single critical flaw of mine.

*A thick blue vein appears on Genesis's forehead*

• Meanwhile, Lazard is showing Angeal some deep breathing exercises.

Lazard: Relax, inhale. Imagine you're walking on a beach...

• A football flies in out of nowhere and hits Angeal in the face, knocking him down. Kunsel rushes up to him.

Kunsel: Apologies! Me and the guys were messing around!

Angeal: *eye twitching* It is fine.

Kunsel: You're blue.

Angeal: IT IS FINE.

• Meanwhile, Zack is watching Reno load up his plate with steak, fries and fried chicken. He's salivating.

Reno: Dude, one slice of pizza won't kill you. It's all about moderation.

Zack: No way! I'm a changed man. I don't need all that heart-attack food to be happy.

*Reno takes a bite out of a chicken wing*

*Zack immediately starts sobbing*

• Meanwhile, Sephiroth and Genesis are back at their table. Sephiroth has Genesis's copy of Loveless in hand and is reciting it wrong on purpose. Genesis is slamming his head on the table.

Sephiroth: Hath the shattered dreams of the morrow.

*BANG*

Sephiroth: Wings are lost, dreams stripped away.

*BANG*

Sephiroth: Mystery in infinite is the goddess of the gift.

*BANG*

Sephiroth: Two friends go into battle. Three of them die.

*BANG* *BANG* *BANG*

• Meanwhile, Angeal is under a table meditating. There's ten minutes to go until midnight. He just has to last ten more minutes.

• Suddenly, there's a commotion outside. Angeal slips his head out to see that Zack has attacked president Shinra. Apparently, the president had a 20lb lobster delivered to his table and Zack went feral. Four turks are trying and failing to pull Zack away from the lobster meat on the president's plate.

• Zack has failed his new year's resolution.

• Angeal rushes out. "I TOLD YOU YOU COULDN'T DO IT! LET GO⏤LET GO OF THE MAN'S LOBSTER, ZACK! ARE YOU GROWLING AT ME!? THAT'S IT *He slips his shoe off to use it as a weapon*

• Angeal has failed his new year's resolution.

• Meanwhile, Sephiroth and Genesis approach Tseng and Rufus. Sephiroth is smiling.

Sephiroth: Good evening, gentlemen. I hope you're having a wonderful new year's eve. How are you both?

Tseng: I'm well, Sephiroth, thank you. You're being awfully sociable,

Sephiroth: It's my new year's resolution.

Tseng: You're doing a good job!

• Rufus notices Genesis's silence.

Rufus: What about you, Rhapsodos? What's your goal for the new year?

Genesis:

Rufus: Do you understand my question?

Genesis:

Rufus: Oh, have I upset you? Are you mad at me?

Sephiroth: Genesis is just shy because he has feelings for you.

*Genesis snaps his head towards him, then looks at Rufus, shaking his head violently*

Rufus: ....Is that so?

Sephiroth: Oh, yes. He's just gone on and on about how attractive and charming he finds you.

Rufus: I had no idea you felt like this, Commander.

*Genesis is glaring at Sephiroth. If looks could kill, Sephiroth would be slaughtered*

Rufus: You don't need to be shy around me, Genesis. We can talk about this like men.

Sephiroth: That would be hard to do. Genesis claims to feel emasculated around me. It appears that my⏤quote⏤strong, unyielding masculine energy provokes his inferiority complex.

*Genesis is turning purple*

Tseng: There's nothing to be ashamed of, Genesis. We all have our flaws, you especially.

• Genesis inhales.

Genesis: THAT'S IT! I DON'T NEED THIS! I DON'T NEED THIS AT ALL. I'LL PAY YOU EACH 1000 GIL! HECK, I'LL PAY YOU 10,000 GIL EACH IF IT MEANS I'LL NEVER HAVE TO GO THROUGH THAT AGAIN!

*he turns to Tseng*

Genesis: HOW DARE YOU CLAIM I HAVE FLAWS. MY FLAWS ARE MY BUSINESS, YOU INSUFFERABLE LAP-DOG!

*he turns to Rufus*

Genesis: AND PLEASE! I AM SO OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE! HOW DARE YOU BELIEVE ALL THAT RUBBISH! THE ONLY FEELINGS I HARBOR FOR YOU, RUFUS, ARE CONTEMPT AND PITY!

*he turns to Sephiroth*

Genesis: WHENEVER YOU SMILE, YOU LOOK LIKE THE SHARK FROM FINDING NEMO!

Sephiroth:

Genesis: AND ME, FEEL EMASCULATED AROUND YOU? YOU, WITH YOUR GIRLY HAIR AND QUADRUPLE-D CHEST?? YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR MIND.

Genesis: NOW, IF YOU GENTLEMEN WILL EXCUSE ME, I'M GOING TO GRAB A MICROPHONE, GET UP ON THAT STAGE, AND TALK FOR AN HOUR!

• Genesis stomps off angrily.

Tseng: He needs an exorcism.

Rufus: By the way, Sephiroth, why did you instruct the turks to deliver a 20lb lobster to the president's table?

Tseng: And why did you have me suggest to Angeal that he meditate under the table right across from the president's?

Sephiroth: Because I am a mastermind.

[betterbemeta]

because I love to cook the youtube algorithm pushes me a lot of food porn videos which I guess are adjacent. But over time, something about them feels cruel to me. The influencers are living in an alternate universe. 'Surf n' turf fried rice?' 40 lbs of it for a tailgate?

I live in the USA, and the absolute cheapest online price for snow crab legs I could find was $10 a lb and I have no idea if the product's any good quality. As of November 2024, the wholesale prices before markup were over $8 a lb. I haven't seen them in my grocery store for under $14 a lb. Online, 10 lb cases of crab like he's carrying there go for almost always over $100. Sometimes over $200. There was a 2018-2019 population collapse due to a marine heatwave that knocked out over 10 billion crabs.

The stated price of a beef tenderloin varies wildly depending on where I look. I can find a USDA report that states that the retail cost of beef tenderloin in my area in 2024 was around $8-$11 per lb but I have NEVER seen it for under $15 a lb on sale in the store, at least recently. Grass-fed beef costs a lot more. Maybe I am not looking hard enough, and there ARE definitely ways to get meat cheaper, like buying a cow share. But like... do you get what I am saying? That meat fried rice guy is holding is potentially over $100 by itself. and why the hell do you need tenderloin to make fried rice, anyway? It's one of the more expensive cow parts, it's filet mignon.

I kind of find it fun to watch videos where a butcher cuts up wagyu beef because it's a luxury that I can't justify spending on myself. But after a certain point this stuff stops feeling like fantasy, and begins feeling cruel. Maybe this guy has special connections where he can get that much crab for below wholesale prices, or has special deals with farmers to get a $60 whole tenderloin when he wants. But its more likely he's just rich, or is projecting the image of being rich using investor or sponsorship money.

The USA has leadership right now that dismantled any agency that can control bird flu and is blaming egg prices on its enemies. Normal people will be watching their grocery bills further skyrocket due to isolationist tariffs, rent, utilities, and medical prices take more out of their food budgets than ever before. And it would not surprise me if the plan to make up the difference after the feds round up low-wage immigrant workers is to send them right back to work but like, even more literally enslaved.

And youtube wants me to see the altreality where some random guy brings the economic collapse of largely indigenous alaskan fishing communities, and cubed filet mignon, to a tailgate??? what 'let them eat cake' bs is this???

[sarahghetti]

going to the carnival hcs; m.k.

pairing: marc spector x reader, steven grant x reader, jake lockley x reader, the gang's all here

summary: the carnival's in town! some headcanons for how you spend your time there with the boys.

warnings: mildly suggestive near the end, but essentially just pure fluff all the way through. reader is called princesa once, no descriptions otherwise.

word count: 2.0k

moon knight masterlist | all masterlists

the carnival rolls into town—of course you’re all going!

and it’s kind of perfect because they all have their favourite parts.

food

marc is your food guy—he won’t be the one to suggest the funky fair foods like frog legs or peanut putter pickle corn dogs, but he will go halfsies with you on anything you want to get so you can try a lot of different things.

you’re giving this look to the deep fried oreos stand that has marc pursing his lips, obviously hesitant even though he offers no resistance when you direct the two of you towards it.

“if you want cookies, I saw a place near the entrance,” he suggests in a placating sort of way, as though he could dissuade you from trying any of the monstrosities at your disposal.

“but…” you gesture at the sign, look at it! and he’s never been more aware of how much you’ve got him wrapped around your little finger because he’s buying an order for you without a second thought.

“it’s… very sweet,” he remarks after his first bite. “not sure if it’s much of an improvement on the original thing.”

“then why do you keep eating it?” you make grabby hands towards the tray in his hand to try one, and he dangles it out of your reach. “wha—hey!”

“just hang on a sec.” he polishes off his cookie, tongue darting out to catch some errant sugar on his lips before pulling you deep into a kiss.

he’s grinning wide at his own cheesiness before he even draws back completely, your face is burning and, yeah—it’s pretty sweet.

meanwhile steven kind of taps out for this. veganism doesn’t exactly pair well with the hodgepodge of carnival foods being offered, but he will take a good sorbet when it gets particularly hot out.

if he fronts after marc or jake eat something non-vegan, steven will find the nearest lemonade stand to wash the taste out of his mouth. he gets a different one every time, and almost drinks the entire bubblegum flavoured lemonade even though he dislikes it.

jake secretly thinks it’s good. marc fronts again near the end of the cup and immediately tosses it in the trash.

jake has simpler tastes but will try to deviate a little in spirit of the carnival. as long as it’s generally something he likes, like fried chicken or a burger, he won’t mind if it comes in a cone or has a shit-ton of cheese piled on top. is the one to pay eight dollars for a cob of corn.

games

marc and steven will only play the fair game scams if you want to, but jake has no qualms about them at all. you mention that there’s a prize plushie you think is cute and he’s already pulling you towards the booth, eyes glinting in a way that you know he’s up to trouble.

jake then proceeds to crush every single game you come across.

skeeball? he’s getting 100 points with every ball he throws. hoops? draft this man into the nba, he’s sinking baskets like your life depends on it.

jake’s bracing a pellet gun against his shoulder, lining up the scope with the targets at the end of the booth when it finally clicks.

he might not be wearing the suit, but that doesn’t mean that khonshu isn’t with him. you lean in over his shoulder. “wait, are you—?”

bam, bam, bam. three shots, three bullseyes. the people around you are whooping and hollering, but jake just turns to you with a smug look on his face.

“didn’t even need him for this one, princesa, but—” his eyes dart to the top of the booth and you can imagine the god sitting up there, watching you. “what is true justice if not scamming a scammer, hm?”

the attendant comes around to give jake his prize, which he presents to you with flourish and a wink.

“now, is there anything else you want? the fist of vengeance—” he drops his voice down to what you know as an imitation of khonshu “—still has a few games left in him.”

marc fronts again to find his wallet much lighter and his arms full of plushies that jake won for you and just sighs.

steven must’ve read a book about the design behind carnival games at some point because boy is he knowledgeable about it.

it’s a bit of diversion from his usual egyptology, but he seems to know all the tricks of the major games like the back of his hand and leans in close to your ear to tell you exactly what’s happening as you watch other people play.

“you see that?” he points towards the ring toss booth, where a handful of people are fruitlessly bouncing rings off the rims of bottles.

you already know what’s coming but still, you ask: “do you wanna play?”

“oh, no, love, now the rings—” he brings the tips of his forefinger and thumb together in demonstration “—they’re barely big enough to fit over the bottles, you’d have to hit it dead on to have a chance. even then, the material isn’t any help, the rings’ll bounce right off like—that!”

he snaps his fingers, and you giggle a little at his theatrics. the sound always makes him blush a little, and he turns back to the game to distract himself before he gets too flustered.

someone puts down twenty dollars for a bucket of rings and he clicks his tongue in disapproval. “poor buggers.”

maybe he says it a little too loudly, catching the attention of some of the players and his face flushes red as he stammers an apology. you shove him playfully, face similarly burning. “steven!”

“sorry!”

the only exception for marc is the horizonal bar game, you know, the one where someone has to hang from a bar for some length of time? it’s practically impossible because it rotates under your hands, yeah, yeah, steven—he knows.

but marc’s a guy with far above average fitness who climbs up walls on the reg. doesn’t even need khonshu’s power to beat it, he just hangs up there, smirking at you as the timer counts down. it’s the easiest prize he’s ever won in his life.

rides

marc’s whole life is a rollercoaster, so he’s ok.

but in all seriousness, the midway rides aren’t really his thing. they’re transported in from who-knows-where, then set up in a parking lot by who-knows-who, and you’re supposed to just let them flip you upside down over and over again while paying ten bucks for the honour? no. he does not trust them.

steven and jake, however, see all the bright lights and loud music and are a little more favourable.

steven probably feels nauseous at the idea of being put upside down, but travelling fast in a circle, or spinning around in teacups? he’s so down. will join you in spinning the teacups to the max or sport a devilish grin as he singlehandedly spins the teacup as you scream.

(will give you a lil kiss on the forehead as an apology if he accidentally takes it too far)

jake sees the crazier rides as a challenge. won’t push you to do them if you really aren’t comfortable, but he gets this spark in his eyes and promises to keep you safe if you ride with him.

what does that mean? it means that he has full confidence that if there’s a failure in any of the safety mechanisms, he can suit up and save you before anything bad happens.

marc is absolutely flabbergasted that jake “protector of the body” lockley even considers going on any of these deathtraps. loudly protests from within as jake tells you about how fast his reaction time is—it doesn’t matter, jake, just don’t take them on the ride in the first place!

the Ferris Wheel SceneTM goes a bit differently depending on who’s fronting at the time.

steven absolutely insists on going on the ferris wheel and will wait any length of line so that you can ride it.

“look at that!” he’s pressed against your side, shoulder to hip, and uses your joined hands to point out landmarks in the distance as you climb in height. the city lights glitter across the horizon, and steven laughs at the spectacle of it all.

he’s probably imagined this very moment happening ever since you told him that the carnival was coming to town—sitting on top of a ferris wheel with you at his side, being able to kiss you at the top.

“did you have fun?” you bump into his shoulder, smiling at how happy he looks.

“fun? love, this is—” he shakes his head. “today has been like a dream. you’re like a dream.”

he says the last part like a confession, grinning, and you feel his happiness when he finally gets to press his lips to yours.

jake suggests you go on the ferris wheel in the same way as when he suggested the two of you cheat at the carnival games, so you’re immediately suspicious.

“stop looking at me like that.” he tries and fails to keep a smirk off his face, giving you an innocent look as he rests a hand on your knee. “isn’t it beautiful outside?”

it is. you take your eyes off him for one moment to admire the view and his hand creeps higher, fingertips pressing into your thigh.

“jake!” your eyes widen, and the bastard has the audacity to laugh. he leans in close, lips brushing against the shell of your ear.

“nobody can see us up here—it’s just you and me.” his lips move down to graze your jaw, and your breath catches in your throat. your heart flutters.

“I like the sound of that.” jake pulls back slightly to see the small smile on your face. “’you and me.’”

it’s like you’ve taken the wind out of his horny sails. he can’t help but to smile back, and when he kisses you again, on the lips this time, you know that he agrees with you.

the ferris wheel is the only ride you can convince marc to go on; no matter what he says, he’s a big softie at heart.

he keeps an arm wrapped around you the entire time, holding you close. the scent of him envelopes you like a warm blanket.

marc doesn’t say a lot, preferring to just enjoy your company as you slowly make your way to the top. you don’t mind—you just rest your head on his shoulder and wait for him to open up on his own.

when you stop at the top, it’s like you’re in a movie. the neon lights spread out beneath you, your quiet breaths in the cabin, the soft kiss he presses to the top of your head.

“I love you,” he murmurs, and it means so much more than you’ll ever know. you smile up at him and he looks back at you with the softest expression you’ve ever seen—like he’s at finally at peace, and you’re the reason why.

you can’t help but kiss him, then—let him taste the words as you say “I love you, too.”

[fernsnailz]

January 2024 Review Roundup

hello everypony‼️ something i want to do through 2024 is a mini review series where i recap some of the media i watched/played/read at the end of every month. this was inspired by tumblr user ponett’s 2023 media wrap-up, it's a great collection of quick reviews so go check it out!

i’m doing this partially as writing/analysis practice, but mostly because my memory is really bad and i want to keep track of what i've seen this year. with that said, my thoughts on everything i finished in january 2024 is under the cut :]

Portal 1 + 2

yyyup i beat Portal and it only took me (checks watch) 13 years

the first time i played Portal 2 was at a friend’s house when i was in middle school, and i had a fuckin blast. but after all that time... it still holds up! i don’t think anything i have to say about Portal will be particularly new since people have been praising this series since it came out. the writing, the level design, even the controls feel tight and engaging the whole way through. i played on switch and expected a bit of jank, but i was pleasantly surprised at how smooth it felt to play. the only part that dragged for me were the levels through the old aperture labs, but i think i would like them a lot more on a second replay. Portal 2 is fantastic and one of my new favorite games, the artistry behind it is truly incredible and i’m really glad i finally finished it. while i was playing Portal 2, i described Glados and Wheatly to a friend and said “they’re like if a ceiling fan could be passive aggressive and if Fozzie Bear was an evil golf ball”

I Think You Should Leave

finally. i can truly understand and appreciate Subspace Dubbed Over

i think one of my favorite things about I Think You Should Leave is how it utilizes horror. beyond sitting slack-jawed in disbelief at the crazy events unfolding before my eyes, a number of the sketches dipped into bits that genuinely kinda scared me. like the one sketch that circulates on here where the guy (pig?) in a mask crawls through a dog door, which is. genuinely terrifying. but so many of the other sketches have slow, nerve-racking pacing leading to crazy shit that would be perfect in a horror film were the context different. idk i like dissecting how horror and comedy are essentially the same thing and I Think You Should Leave was very good at enabling that <3 favorite sketches are probably “then let my wife eat the damn receipt” and “55 BURGERS 55 HOTDOGS 100 FRIES 100 TATER TOTS”

Sonic Prime Season 3

man. ohhhh man. i didn’t go into this with high expectations and i still feel let down. Sonic Prime Season 3 was definitely my least favorite “season” of the batch - abysmal pacing, very few character moments i actually enjoyed, and the things i praised about the show felt very underutilized through these episodes. Nine is the shining star of Sonic Prime and i was looking forward to seeing his more villainous side, but his character took such a sharp turn into pure evil and it felt like he spent the entire season repeating the same three lines. and as much as i praise Shadow’s writing in Prime, it doesn’t really matter when he spends half of the season trapped in a hole that he just… runs out of later.

lastly, i cannot stop thinking about how bad the pacing of this season is. three episodes for a repetitive final battle feels like such a waste of time when you see just how much they rush the emotional resolutions in the last episode. however, there is one thing i truly love about Sonic Prime Season 3 - i love the Sails and Mangey fakeout death. it's so fucking funny. like you really expect me to believe that two cartoon animals in this Y-7 rated show EXPLODED?????? absolute comedy gold.

overall, i just… don’t really know what to think of Sonic Prime. anything i enjoyed in the show was often fleeting, and much of it felt like its only purpose was to waste my time. also Rouge i can’t believe they did you so dirty oh my god

Ghost Trick

i was so proud that i figured out the secret behind Sissel’s memory loss like halfway through the game. however i also kept getting caught during the prison escape sequence like an idiot

Ghost Trick is in a similar situation as Portal where 1. it’s incredible and one of my new favorite games, and 2. there’s nothing i can really say about it that hasn’t already been said or just. shouldn’t be said. Ghost Trick is a fantastic mystery game, and because of that i think it’s best to go into its story as blind as possible. the narrative unfolds in such fascinating ways - even though the actual object manipulation gameplay isn’t directly about solving the mystery (like in Ace Attorney or other mystery games), it still ties wonderfully into the story in some incredibly unique ways.

i also really love the artstyle of Ghost Trick - i love 2D character artwork with that sharp lineweight, it reminded me a lot of Sonic Battle (another game with an artstyle i love). i was also really impressed by the 3D character models and animation - despite the limitations of the camera, you get a wonderful sense of everyone’s personality from the limited body language expressed in the overworld (even though the models lack much facial expression which. i guess they don’t really need? idk that was the only thing that threw me off). anyways yeah everyone should play Ghost Trick so Ghost Trick fans can be freed from their curse and talk about it without having to tag like 10 different spoiler tags. and for Missile

Scott Pilgrim Takes Off

ok bear with me. i went into Scott Pilgrim Takes Off without reading the comics first. and i fuckin loved it

my understanding of Scott Pilgrim before SPTO was mostly from the movie (I KNOW I’M SORRY), but even with my base understanding of the series i really enjoyed this show for what it was. i found myself appreciating the time they dedicated to further develop every single character in the show - especially Ramona. she’s fantastic as the lead, i really loved watching her reconcile with her exes and seeing all of them grow instead of exploding into coins. my favorite episode was probably the one with her and Roxie - not only did i adore the movie-jumping set pieces, but you really understand the weight of Ramona’s mistakes in their past relationship and how much it hurt Roxie. despite the big climactic fight, the flashbacks are quiet, subtle, heartbreaking. Ramona’s apology is genuine, and it feels so wonderful to watch her confront her past throughout the show. also i think it’s really funny that for all these characters to become the best versions of themselves, they had to kill off Scott for most of the story

and holy shit the artstyle and animation. oh my god. i love watching something that makes me immediately go “i need to see the storyboards for this RIGHT NOW.” SPTO is such a visual delight to watch, it elevates the artstyle of the comics while also keeping what makes that style so appealing - i love the line weight on the characters, i love how much forward energy the animation has, i love the fucking. virtual boy section. as soon as i found out Science Saru was also behind Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken, everything made immediate sense. i was destined to love this show.

another worry i had going into SPTO (besides the fact that i hadn’t read the comics lol) is that the original cast from the movie was returning. i think the movie cast is fine, but i wasn’t sure how some of them would fare with voice acting for animation. however, i thought they all did a good job - i think the whole cast loves these characters and would be able to fit into them fairly easily no matter what form their performance takes, and they definitely had a good voice director in the studio with them. the only thing that felt off about the voice performances to me was that sometimes it sounded like some of their mics kept peaking?? idk some of these episodes i watched high as balls and i felt like i could hear and see every single sound and frame of the show. so that might have just been me.

god i did not. expect to have this much to say about Scott Pilgrim. i really loved this show and i’m currently reading the comics to fully catch up on the general Scott Pilgrim experience - i think reading the comics AFTER Takes Off is making me appreciate even more of the character work that went into the show. like they do so much with Mathew Patel in SPTO, a character that was. not originally around for a long time from what i’ve gathered? also i like the funny little robot. oh my GOD i cannot talk about this show anymore whatever it’s good get me out of here

Sword AF Season 1

i put on the Smosh cast’s D&D series to play in the background while i was drawing. i did not expect to think much of it. instead, i had one of the most enjoyable D&D podcast experiences since i listened to The Adventure Zone Balance???

i haven’t really enjoyed other D&D podcasts since i dropped off of The Adventure Zone, and i wasn’t expecting much from Sword AF of all things. then i saw that Shayne was playing as a druid warforged made of plants and his name was fucking Fernie and i sat my ass down and LISTENED. while i think Sword AF is currently lacking in its world and larger story, those things just. aren’t really what Sword AF is really trying to provide at the moment. it’s main focus is comedy, and the players are genuinely such a delight to watch play together and build off of each other. they mostly focus on bits and goofs for the sake of she show's comedic tone, but i still found it thoroughly enjoyable because every player embodies and performs their characters really well. idk Sword AF was an unexpected hit for me this month, i thought it was fun. and i love Fernie so much

Plastic Death - Glass Beach

so originally i wasn’t going to include music reviews in these roundups at all, but then i was entirely surprised by a new Glass Beach album and oh my god. holy shit. oh my fucking god jesus christ. holy shit. its preddy good

Plastic Death gets the low point of the album out of the way immediately. it starts with the “phone call/conversation audio” trope that i don’t particularly enjoy - HOWEVER despite me disliking this opening, 1. it sets up the overall themes of Plastic Death very quickly, and 2. the rest of the album blows this 40 second opening completely out of the water. from there, the album grows into something beautiful and uncontained, and i just. i really like it

Plastic Death captures the beauty of the temporary, asks what it means to be created for a cause you can’t fulfill, questions if you can reclaim yourself from cycles and constraints designed to destroy you. and is also about being transgender. the lyrics are abstract in a way that requires a conversation with the listener, many of the vocals obscured and smooth like waves - this album is definitely one that needs to be listened to a few times. i wasn’t sure how i felt about the vocal style at first before realizing the vocals were the main reason i was relistening to this album, allowing myself to find even more that i loved about it. the instrumentation is also incredible, i love the use of marimba in a number of songs - distant, eerie, almost skeletal. and the fucking. 8-bit section?? which kinda rules???? and that’s the only point in the album it ever shows up??????? incredible. a fleeting, somewhat silly moment that i love every time.

this album left my heart aching, in part from my connection to it and in part from the pure love and joy emanating from this music. i can feel just how much fun this music was to perform and create, a cohesion of time and sound that just clicked for me. Plastic Death made me miss playing music, which is something i haven’t felt in years. all from an album that starts with a conversation about CrankGameplay’s dead youtube channel. good lord

i like this album a normal amount. go listen to it a few times. my favorite tracks are cul-de-sac and commatose

Wish

i watched Wish with a couple of friends and knew i probably wasn't going to like it. with that in mind, i gave myself a challenge: i wanted to find one thing about this movie that i genuinely really loved. it could be anything, and loving it for ironic reasons was allowed.

here's the complete list of things i loved about Disney's Wish (2023):

i love the one shot where King Magnifico stirs an evil caldron evily. i thought it was hilarious. what was he cooking

i loved that the end credits included a reference to Dinosaur 2001 at all, and i loved that they paid homage to Big Hero 6 by showing the forgettable villain of that movie instead of their Baymax cashcow for some reason. my friends and i saw him show up in the credits and were like "who's the trenchcoat guy??"

you may notice that this list is very short and 50% of it is about the movie's credits. so yeah this movie is not very good

Wish is an empty husk of a movie. everything about it feels so, so hollow - lifeless town squares, uninspired character designs (to quote a friend: "i have all of these characters' hairstyles in The Sims"), characters whose existence is only justified to fill empty space or an overused archetype, and an "evil" villain who lacks charisma and spine in a futile effort to remind the audience of previous disney villains with actual character. even the artstyle lacks any sort of sauce, the watercolor effect they were trying to go for only makes the backgrounds and character textures run together, and the dull lighting makes things look even more faded. it's like disney was scared of making a movie that made its audience feel... anything. all to celebrate 100 years of Disney slop, baby!!!

Some YouTube videos I liked in January: 💥 An Exhaustive Look at Pokemon Brilliant Diamond 💥 TomSka's Guide to Plagiarism 💥 Paradise Bombed (this video is a great piece of journalism and i’m definitely not doing it justice by throwing it into the youtube vid list) 💥 Surprising Our Friends with Zoo Animals 💥 Did FNAF Ever Have a Good Story?

thanks for reading! next month’s roundup will be wild because i’ll likely be reviewing House of Leaves and Hazbin Hotel. can you guess which cursed house gives me a worse headache? WHO KNOWS! (hint: it's Hazbin Hotel)

[avocado-writing]

hey! first off, i love your writing so much.

secondly, i’d love to see an aziraphale x reader x crowley fic where the reader has some mental health issues (specifically like anxiety and depression) and they’re going through a really rough time at the moment (maybe they’re just in a really bad headspace or their meds aren’t working so they’re struggling really bad) and they just get support and comfort from aziracrow. (i’m ngl this is kind of a self indulgent ask bc i’m personally going through some bad mental health stuff rn -100/10 i do not recommend). anyways, there’s no rush at all i’m just a sucker for hurt/comfort and fluff.

hope you have an amazing day!

notes: finally getting around to clearing out my requests, sorry this took so long - I was sort of avoiding it for a while because I wasn’t in a great space either. I hope you’re doing better x

pairing: aziraphale x reader x crowley (could be read as platonic)

cw: depression/seasonal affective disorder

rating: T

It’s difficult. 

Some days it feels like the fog won’t lift. The dark months, they always get you and it’s awful - you just want to sleep for a long time and not wake up until you know it will be better. You need to get your meds adjusted, really, but the idea of going outside and dealing with people is just a little bit sickening. 

You can’t. You just can’t. 

The lethargy that can only be brought on with melancholia plagues your every waking moment. You know that you’d forget to take care of yourself if it wasn’t for the two of them. 

God knows they’re wonderful. 

Every morning you wake up to a check-in text from Crowley, gently encouraging you to shower because they’ll be over soon. You find the effort to drag yourself to the bathroom and stand under the powerful jet for long enough that you start to zone out, only leaving the enclosure of water and steam when you hear the two of them walk into your flat. 

You never gave them the key. They manage to get in anyway. 

They bring breakfast - well, Aziraphale brings breakfast, and he eats it with you to make sure that you eat at all. That can be something that you forget. Crowley watches you over the rim of his coffee cup until he’s certain you’ve had an adequate amount, and then a miracle takes care of the washing up. 

Then they’re around you for as much or as little as you want them to be, but never more than a phone call away. 

One day you find yourself crying into your fried eggs, and the two of them look aghast. In a flash they’re by your side, holding you, a hand running up and down your back in comfort. 

“My dear, what’s the matter?” Aziraphale asks, and you can hear him snap his jaw shut quickly because well, the depression is the matter. It’s so ridiculous you end up laughing through your sobs. 

“Sorry. Sorry, I’m being silly,” you manage, wiping your eyes on your sleeve. “I just… you’re so wonderful to me. I don’t deserve it.”

“None of that,” Crowley chastises you, gently, “‘course you ‘deserve it’.”

“It isn’t a burden to look after someone you care about, darling,” Aziraphale adds. 

And you can’t bring yourself to say anything more, so you just let yourself be held very tightly. 

tags: @angiestopit @foolishprincipalitee @smile-eywa @staygoldsquatchling02 @underratedboogeyman @specter-soltare @candlewitch-cryptic @cool-ontherun-world @emilynissangtr @willbedecided @bdffkierenwalker @cool-iguana @ilyatan @civil-groupie @willyoubethepookietomypookster @lxsm2 @clarina04 @wtfhasmy-lifecometo @mrgatotortuga @wereallbrokenangels @night-affiliate @silcosmoke @kimqueenofhell @chewbrry @bajablast23 @h3k3t @am-i-obsessed---maybe @bakerstreethound@a-mediocore-writer@darktealrat @chaospossum @belilwen @rex-ray @hunterispunk

[writing-with-yours-truly]

!FLUFF ALPHABET! Mike Schmidt (FNAF)

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them? -> With his hours at the pizzaria, time together is very limited. When he can though, he makes sure to watch a movie or two, with you and Abby.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them? -> He thinks that your hair is really beautiful. It frames your face perfectly, and makes your features pop. He enjoys running his hand through it. If you don't have hair, he thinks that your nose is cute. How it wrinkles up when you laugh or snort, or how it twitches occasionally.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.? -> Oh, he'd try to be there 100%. He'd be asking if you needed water. He'd give you a hug, rubbing circles on your arm telling you that you'd be okay.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o? -> He wants to move from his current house somewhere nicer for Abby. A house you and her deserve. He doesn't know about kids, but he's thought about it.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive? -> He can play either role, honestly. There's times he sets his foot down, and there's times he lets you be the boss. It just depends on the location and the timing.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them? -> He's very grateful for you. It's hard for him to express it, but he's glad you stay up sometimes to watch Abby, or to listen to his rants. You've been through everything with him, and is glad.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything? -> Mike tries to hide his sleeping pills at the beginning of the relationship, but you ended up finding them. You then offered some better alternatives, like warm milk, or even snuggles. Besides that, he has nothing to hide.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems? -> You've helped him be a better brother to Abby. He used to be distant with her just as he was to him, but then when you began to date Mike, you made dinners to eat together. That brought them closer.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it? -> Oh, boy. He does. He's good at hiding it, but it's obvious. He grits his teeth and balls up his hands. Typical reaction. If he thinks it's getting too far between you and someone, he pulls you away. He does trust you, but he's scared this person is a threat.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like? -> He very much is a good kisser. The first kiss was at the creek. The two of you were hanging out, and looking at the stars. You brought your boombox, playing a Train disc you had. The two of you spun around as if you were children, until "Drops of Jupiter" turned on. And one thing led to another. His hand was on your cheek, and leaned halfway. You leaned in the rest of the way, turning your head slightly right. He tasted like coffee, and a bit of french fries from earlier. When you pulled back, dazed out of your mind.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

N icknames - What do they call their s/o? -> He uses the common ones, like sweetheart and babe. But there's times he calls you bug or honey.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching? -> Besides hand holding, he isn't much about PDA. He loves you, but he doesn't want to brag. He doesn't want you to feel like a trophy.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship. -> He's very snuggly (and strong). After a long day at work, he will just come home and pick you up off the couch and take you to his room to sleep comfortably (even though he always tells you to sleep in there)

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative? -> He's not the most romantic person, but he does take you on morning coffee dates to Sparky's occasionally.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them? -> Depending on the goal, he is pretty supportive. If it's a goal like skydiving, he'll be reluctant about it.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine? -> He likes having something organized. Sure, trying new things out every so often is fun, but in this hectic life, he wants to have one thing organized.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic? -> He knows almost everything about you. Your zodiac, where you're from, your favorite perfume, he knows just about all of it. He knows how you cope with things so he can help with any stress or sadness.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life? -> More important than life itself. You help keep his life "normal".

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon. -> When you don't stay over, he sprays his pillow and blanket with your perfume to help him get to sleep.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle? -> He's not the most affectionate, but he does like to hold you. His favorite spot to kiss you is your cheek or your jawline.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner? -> He does or finds little things that remind him of you. He treasures them, even taking some to work with him.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of? -> He would like something he hated just to see you smile. He loves you dearly.

[tobyyobyy]

carl grimes headcannons because we lack of anything for him and i can (most, if not all, are just non-apocalypse headcannons):

- autistic (we are starting off strong here)

- vocally stims vines sometimes (“road work ahead? uh yeah i sure hope it does”, “look at all those chickens”, “i wanna be a cowboy baby”) (he does that last one in front of rick a lot and rick never understands it’s from vine)

- judith: “daddy?”

- carl: “DO I LOOK LIKE-?”

- glenn taught him a lot of stupid jokes like “ligma” and “joe mama” (the usual college kid jokes)

- would use the “joe mama” joke on judith a lot

- judith would retaliate with ligma jokes (“we have the same mom idiot”)

- no one knows where she learnt that one

- loved science as a kid

- switched between wanting to become a cop like rick or an astronomer

- thought about being a palaeontologist but couldn’t see himself doing it for the rest of his life

- didn’t have a lot of friends but was still liked by other kids anyways (doesn’t mean he’s popular, people are just neutral about him)

- is on a swim team

- just likes swimming in general

- MOMMA’S BOY!!!!!

- then lori died so he made that transition over to his dad…yeah

- keeps his hair long and went through that teenage grunge phase

- listens to bands like oasis, los campensinos, nirvana, foo fighters, etc etc

- his parents music taste would sneak in sometimes tho like fleetwood mac, abba (lori) bob dylan, johnny cash (rick), any 80’s songs and old country (below the 70’s)

- because of that grunge phase he’d 100% play the electric guitar

- his grandpa taught him a bit of acoustic whenever they’d visit

- he plays the acoustic sometimes for judith, or anyone in his family who asks, but mainly judith

- plays more chill songs like something you’d find in the ‘life is strange’ soundtrack (bright eyes, angus and julia stone, iron & wine) (most of those are from enid’s music taste)

- rick and michonne let him use the garage but it still drives them up the walls when he jams out with friends

- doesn’t understand the superbowl but because his dad likes it he makes an effort to watch it with him because no one else will

- jump scares any unsuspecting victim when they turn the corner of a wall

- to calm down whenever he’s stressed/overwhelmed/overstimulated he’ll either go swimming or ask his grandparents to come over (they own a farm) to ride some horses

- allergic to peanuts (not pecans because they had to eat some when they met Gabriel so)

- hates anything deep fried except for fish

- terrible in any form of skating

- roller skating? keeps slamming into the wall

- ice skating? uses those kid-balance-crutches-thingys

- he just has terrible coordination

- obviously gets worse when he looses his eye

- he’s good at bowling tho

- even tho he’s a moody teenager he’s EXTREMELY kind

- switches from sciences to arts and english in high school

- started making little family portraits drawings

- can actually understand old english/shakespeare

- makes blanket forts with judith 24/7

- actually does have a southern accent it’s just more like loris (less noticeable than ricks)

- would 100% watch minecraft youtubers

- bisexual little shit (duh)

- when he was a kid he didn’t have a fear of needles but as he grew up he just DESPISED them like shaking screaming crying and throwing up type deal

- hums a lot to judith, usually the song “baby mine”

- snapchat user

- embarrassingly so. especially when he uses the filters

- has a diary and calls it a diary not a journal

- drops trauma like it’s nothing, like a silly joke (this is basically canon but i’ll still include it in)

- headphones on 24/7 might as well be glued to his head (his ears are too small for earphones and he likes soundproof headphones anyways)

- an entire shelf in his closet is just for comics (and some comics are thin so you can imagine how many he has)

- likes reading other things too instead of just comics

- refuses to wear elastics/tie his hair up even if it gets in his way a lot

- let’s judith put silly hairclips in it

- sometimes forgets to take them out when he gets to school but he doesn’t care much

- would watch: the office, brooklyn nine-nine, the breakfast club & moral orel

[hylianengineer]

I've been having a lot of feelings about the cultural aspects of food recently. Usually, this is a topic that makes me angry because my food allergies and intolerances keep me from participating in a lot of it, but I've had a lot of more positive - if bittersweet - experiences lately.

My grandfather died of cancer just over a month ago. It doesn't feel like it's been that long - I still catch myself talking about him like he's here. But when he got the diagnosis, my sibling and I made cinnamon rolls using his mom's recipe - my great-grandma's. This is The Iconic Dessert in my family. Great-grandma Gladys was a restaurant owner and fantastic cook, and many of her recipes have outlived her by decades already, but this is everyone's favorite. Normally I make it gluten-free and vegan to accommodate various family members' dietary restrictions, but this was 100% traditional, as close to how his mom would've made it as we could manage.

It's been nearly two weeks since the funeral and I'm still eating leftovers. In Midwestern culture - and many others - when shit hits the fan, you bring food. Right after he died, everyone was bringing food to my grandma. More than she could eat, and it was a little overwhelming, but I still find the gesture sweet. Because that's just what we do in our culture. Someone dies, and we make food. So the grieving family doesn't have to. To keep our hands and minds busy. Because we have to find some way to express all the love and pain we're feeling - and so we make food. Or buy food, nowadays - my cousins showed up unannounced with Kentucky Fried Chicken, which I previously could not have imagined my grandmother eating. (She has a home economics degree and the closest she normally comes to eating fast food is Chipotle.) Desperate times and desperate measures, I guess?

One of the fondest memories I have of my grandpa during the last few months of his life is watching him eat the apple pie I made him, with apples off the tree in my backyard. I wasn't expecting to find apples there, it was July and unseasonably early for them, but then this tree has always been a bit odd. I picked the biggest, least buggy apples I could find and then spent hours cutting them up and painstakingly carving worms out of them. It was honestly pretty gross, but there is nothing I would have rather been doing. He didn't have much of an appetite by then, but he did eat the pie with more enthusiasm than anything else in those days. My dad took a photo of him eating a slice of it and it's the last one I have of him - I treasure that photo. It was the last time I saw him alive, and the last thing I said to him was 'see ya.' None of us thought we were out of time, but if we had to be, that's a pretty damn good last memory.

[dandylovesturtles]

Please tell me something about the Shape of Water AU I'm very curious

this is just the doc title for my "100 Feet and a World Away" AU! I have the lore post linked in my pinned.

tldr: the boys get kidnapped young and raised in a lab by humans who aren't aware they have human level intelligence, and they try to escape.

I posted a bit about Donnie (aka Turtle Four) eating french fries awhile ago but here, have the rest of the scene too:

April unwraps something. The smell assaults his nose - greasy meat, cheese, that red vegetable he’s seen sometimes - and he slips into the water and swims over, popping out just shy of the fence.

“I’m sorry, are you eating during our escape planning meeting?”

“Don’t start with me,” she says, holding up a hand. “I had to work through breakfast to catch up on my homework for my morning classes, then work through lunch to catch up on my homework for my afternoon classes, and then I worked through dinner to catch up on everything else.” She takes a bite, chews, swallows. “This is the first chance I’ve had to eat all day.”

“Huff! Fine. But did you have to bring something with so much…” he flails his hands, “smell?”

“It’s just a burger. What, you never had a burger before?”

He stares at her. She catches his eye, and then lowers her gaze.

“Right. Stupid question.”

“Sometimes the humans bring those. The burgers, you said? They eat them around noon.” He thinks of it with distaste. He can remember exactly which of the humans tend to chew with their mouths open, or talk with food in their mouths. It makes him feel slimy when he watches. 

“We call that “lunch”,” April says. She looks at the burger, then back at Four. It’s with an expression he doesn’t understand, but he’s noticed from her more and more. “Do you want to try it?”

He hesitates. He doesn’t know if he wants to or not. The smell is overwhelming, and he isn’t sure how it will taste. How it will feel, in his mouth.

No one ever offers him food, though.

“...I’m perfectly fine with my nutrition blocks,” he finally says.

“Oh come on, Donnie, that’s not food.”

“It is. It gives me all the vitamins and minerals I need. And…” He stumbles over what he wants to say. He hates when he does that, but he doesn’t know the words for what he’s trying to convey. He wishes he had a bigger vocabulary. He wishes he were allowed to read.

Wishes get him nowhere. He has to focus on the task at hand. Only, April doesn’t seem to want to continue with their escape planning unless he makes a decision about the burger.

“...And?” she prompts, startling him.

“...I don’t know… some food… feels weird,” he finally says.

“Feels weird?”

“In my mouth.”

For a moment she just stares at him. He guesses he must have said something weird. Humans must not care about how food feels in their mouth. Maybe that’s just a turtle thing.

Or maybe his brothers don’t think that way either. Maybe it’s just a Four thing.

But then April’s eyes go a little wider, and she says, “Ooooh. You have texture issues, huh?”

“Texture?”

“Yeah. How the food feels. Some people get really bothered by it; guess you do, too.”

Oh. So it’s not just a Four thing. There’s a whole name for it. He learned something new! How exciting!

“Yes!” he declares. He feels more confident about it now. “I have texture issues!”

She laughs at that. It’s not a mean laugh. He’s not sure why what he said was funny, though, but before he can ask she’s tearing off a small piece of the meat on the side of the burger she didn’t bite.

“Here. Just try it.” She slips it through the gaps in the chain-link, where he can get to it. “If it feels bad, you can just spit it out. I won’t be mad.”

She’s always telling him that. That she won’t be mad. He doesn’t know why; he’s never seen her get mad, at least not at him. But she always tells him that anyway.

It makes him feel better, somehow, even though that’s illogical.

He takes the meat gingerly in his fingers and looks at it. It doesn’t look particularly appetizing. The smell is a lot, but not so bad now that he’s getting used to it. He likes meat - not that he’s had it much. Maybe it will be fine.

He puts it in his mouth and immediately knows it isn’t. He doesn’t like the way the meat falls apart. He can’t describe it, he just knows it’s wrong.

He spits it out. April said she wouldn’t be mad.

“No good, huh?” she asks. She doesn’t sound mad.

“No. It was bad, actually.”

“Hmm, alright…” She glances around, then grabs the sack and pulls out something else: a small container of something thin and golden brown. “Wanna try a french fry?”

“A french fry?”

“It’s just a fried potato.” She pulls one of the thin stick-things (french fry) out of the container and pokes it through the fence. “Here!”

He takes it, looking it over suspiciously. It has the same greasy smell as the burger, but it’s not meat, it’s “potato,” so it must have a different texture.

He nibbles the end, and oh.

It’s actually good!

He devours the rest of the fry. She laughs again, and when he looks back at her she’s smiling.

“Alright, so the fries are a winner. Here, have some more!”

She slips a few more through the fence, and then a few more. Four happily eats all the fries she passes him. They taste nothing like the nutrition blocks, they taste better than the nutrition blocks, and they don’t feel bad in his mouth, not even a little.

“When I get out of here,” he says, after downing the last one, “I’ll eat like this every day.”

“Maybe not fries every day. They’re pretty unhealthy.” She shrugs. “But there’s all kinds of other things out there for you to try! We’ll figure out all the foods you like to eat.”

[clavissionary-position]

Ikeprinces Ranked By How Badly They Crave Taco Bell

SARIEL . Taco Bell is the only thing keeping his mind from shattering. The only reason you've never seen the wrappers is because an employee from Taco Bell runs 40 miles to the palace every day to hand-feed Sariel while he does his work

KEITH . And now you know why he's so tall, because every Taco Bell taco produces 0.0005 cm of height in his bones, and those tacos have been adding up since he was fed them in liquid form out of the baby bottle. Jade's fuckin weird, don't ask

LICHT . Keith got him hooked. He's a burrito-supreme man. Swears by it. Prays by it. Dreams of being able to follow a copy-cat recipe at home one day without setting too big of a fire

NOKTO . Licht got him hooked. It's his post-coital meal of choice. He leaves the wrappers on the pillows of his lovers like a honeymoon rose

SILVIO . Nokto got him hooked. But he still retains a sense of self when presented with the golden richness of a chicken quesadillas. He compartmentalizes his drool like he compartmentalizes his emotions, which is to say: poorly. Wants to buy Nokto's shares of Taco Bell but Nokto isn't yielding

LEON . Take the shell, leave the meat. Is it the best meat he's ever had? Not by a longshot, but MSG is heccin hypnotizing. Is ground meat for losers? Absolutely not. Protein is protein, baby. Now go watch Leon flex at the sun while Jin coaches him

JIN . Craves it only if one of his brothers is eating Taco Bell in front of him, but otherwise he much prefers the sweets and desserts available at the palace. Though once in a blue moon, he has been known to go feral for some Nacho Fries.

CLAVIS . Has an intellectual interest in the workings of Taco Bell and its menu. Many a night has he sat in the dark of the kitchen, smiling-ly glaring down a lone soft-shell chicken taco. What makes it tick? What gives it the right to be the temptress that it is? How can he, the savant, engineer an even more supreme Crunchwrap Supreme?

GILBERT . Isn't craving Taco Bell specifically, but if you're not gonna finish that, he most certainly will. Have you ever seen a man mouth-vacuum little beads of taco beef straight from the shell into his mouth? There was no any vacuum sfx involved however; you imagined that part 100%....90%...........75% you imagined that

YVES . Not a fan of Taco Bell after briefly working there in the summer of 1258

LUKE . Always falls asleep waiting at the drive-thru so he has yet to know what it is that he is missing

CHEVALIER . Taco what?

RIO . Is the Taco Bell employee that runs 40 miles every day to hand-feed Sariel his Nachos BellGrande® Combo

a/n: Did someone make fanart of Ikeprinces and tacos or was that one of my cursed dreams? Pls link me if you know what I'm talking about

[maringlechan]

Journaling~~ 2025

Hello 2025!

Here to put down whats happened over the last few days and journal for Jan 1st bc i really wanna try and do as much journaling/recalling events as much as i possibly can this year.

Let's start from last week around Christmas eve/day on Tuesday/Wednesday. Christmas eve i was out shopping for last minute things but didnt really do much for the day.

Christmas day was spent with morning at my moms house at 10am and we all showed up late TT. A nice chill morning with brekkie and mimosas. Mom and Gabe did a brekkie bar that had eggs, potatoes, cheese, bacon, and their little sausage and cream cheese croissants. We played our usual bingo game and i won the last game! The prize was $100!!! Stayed at their house watching Christmas movies until dinner at Uncle Jon's house at 5pm. Stayed there for a bit too for dinner. Uncle made brisket, sliced potato stacks, and so many dessert cookies that Heather and grandma Cheryl made. Packed leftovers and made it home for a quiet rest of the night.

Stayed home to finish out the week as i waited for Morgan to come home from his parents house. He didnt get back until Saturday the 28th. He left down to visit them the 23rd. Since on the 22nd, he was getting gifts for his sisters. He finally came home on Saturday the 28th and i couldnt wait to see him!

I was hanging out with drew on Sunday, just running around doing stuff since i was bored and wanted to see Morgan that night too. I ended up going to his place and when i was about to leave at like 11:30pm, Seven wouldnt start! I tried letting the battery restart by disconnecting the plug sparks on it (probs not the right words). Couldnt get Seven to start to spent the night and waited til morning.

I felt so bad since morgan wanted to have a bit of time to be writing on his story a bit more. But we still had a nice day and made chilled with youtube, gaming, and cooking as I had Seven worked on. I ended up having to call a tow truck and have him towed to the Firestone that was just down the street. I asked them to do an oil change, since I knew he needed one, and also do a battery check and replace whatever they needed to to get him running.

Seven got fixed and Morgan said he wanted me to stay the night tomorrow night. So, I asked Drew if it was ok for me to stay over and he said yes! I stayed over and we had a charcuterie board with the smoked cheeses and summer sausage my mom gave me for christmas. He showed me some ZB1, his latest fav boy group. We watched some old family guy episodes and then played both of the new board games i got, Tippy the Dragon and Pop the Pirate! They were pretty fun! We went to sleep pretty late and had to get up early since Seven wasnt parked in an ideal spot.

We woke up at 7am and left shortly after to avoid getting a ticket. We wanted to eat at this place in Tukwila called, Jony's. It looks like a small mom and pop shop in the corner of the plaza where the 711 is across from the Taco Bell. They ended up not being open so we opted for Neighborhood Cafe, which was a Filipino Cafe next to the Indian Curry Palace which is where me and Morgan usually get our indian food. The food was a little over sweet and mid for both of our dishes. I got a latte with oatmilk, avocado toast (arugula, tomato, avocado, feta cheese) and banana bread french toast (banana slices on banana bread drizzled with syrup). Drew got the chicken fried steak and an ube biscuit. Drew thought it was all very mid. It was a cute little place though. Might take morgan if he thinks the menu looks good!

After that we went to Target, Barnes & Noble and then the mall. I bought my Lion King windbreaker jacket i was looking for, but still didn't get it in the ideal size of a Large. Got a medium instead since it was out of stock everywhere. Didnt really find much else so we went to Auburn instead. We went to the outlet mall and Drew found 2 sets of the little plague doctor plushies that hes been collecting ever since i gave him the original plague doctor in a boo basket. He was looking for a Knuckles plush too! We found one at Spencers, but the plague doctors were ones he wanted a lot more.

After that it was Muckleshoot Casino! I used my bingo win and pulled out about $80. I was up a few hundred until I lost it all TT. Drew was up for a bit too but it sounds like he broke even by the time that we left for the night. Dropped off Drew and then went to Morgans for the night, it was new years eve!!

We stayed up til shortly after midnight and called it a night. We drank a little bit and smoked a little bit but nothing too crazy. We did fall asleep on the futon though and didn't get to the den to sleep until like 4:30 in the morning TT.

We had a lazy wakeup at about 8ish with some <3333 before making brekkie. We had the new coffee i got that was a Lion King anniversary coffee that was cinnamon and brown sugar flavored. We also made chinese broccoli and ate as Morgan played God of War Ragnarok. We drank coffee in our new christmas tree mugs i bought us.

Morgan then opened up all his presents shortly after and i felt kind of bad that i had gotten him a few things since he looked shocked and said he felt bad that he didnt get anything. I never expected him too though, giving gifts is just another way I like to say, I love you to him. I'm gonna try and not do so much gift giving and try other things that show Morgan i love him a lot besides gifts. He really likes acts of service (like when im doing the dishes for him or offer to help out in the kitchen).

After that the rest of the day was pretty chill with just youtube and a run to the store for Ezelles and dairy queen for a sweet treat. We had the chicken curry i helped make the day before so I wanted something else to eat. I ended up leaving my sweet treat in the freezer and didnt realize until i got home! TT He said he'd come by for a kitty sleepover on Sunday <3

I left Morgans at around 9ish and stopped at Drew's since when we went shopping last, he left his new Sabrina Carpenter album and body wash in the car. We chatted a little bit then I went home.

Here i am now writing this journal entry just to make sure its done for the first day of january!!

Anyways, heres to 2025! <3