#hayden’s musings

[peachyspaceslvt]

ANAKIN SKYWALKER

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005) - dir. George Lucas

[headintheselbywall]

[battledroidwrites]

i hope 2005 hayden christensen knows how much we love him.

[ramblingsfromthytruly]

actually fully got through preacher's daughter (including reading the lyrics + genius annotations, replaying each song multiple times, hthaze reaction vid for cathartic purposes) and just ... wow

[kaitlinamberxo]

“Don't lecture me, Obi-Wan! I see through the lies of the Jedi. I do not fear the dark side as you do. I have brought peace, freedom, justice, and security to my new Empire.”

kaitlin's 100 favorite fictional muses — 43/100: Anakin Skywalker

[phoeebsbuffay]

Imagine you work with Hayden Christensen and… you fall in love with him.

Warnings: fluffy, comfort/light reading, filled with old cliches.

***

You are in that moment of your life where daydreaming about men in general has long lost any sense; when flirting happens you sabotage it: when you just enjoy solitude, even though there is this small part of you that never really quit that romantic side.

Nevertheless, at long last you are working hard, so there is little time to think about those things. You work so hard, however, that family and friends warn you about your mental health. But you dismiss their concern. You just like occupying your mind, is all.

Hayden thinks likewise. After divorce, romance has long disappeared out of his sight and mind. Of course, he engages in casual flings every now and then, but even so it’s been… what? Two, three years since he actually got laid?

Not that he minds. His return to “Star Wars” saga, or rather his come back to acting in general, besides his daughter, have been the main reasons to let him busy enough to such nonsenses.

But it so appears that destiny holds something different, though… And so, dear reader, we are invited to investigate how this will roll.

Today is the first day of the filming of a movie that Hayden is starring after finishing his work at “Ahsoka”. So as he arrives and you too, such paths collide.

You, distracted, just tumbled when Hayden, who happens to be nearby, quickly comes to aid you, thus preventing a worse fall to occur.

“Whoa whoa, calm down, take it easy Miss”, so he says, concerned.

“Oh thank you, sir. Disastrous me, uh?”, you joke in response, getting a smile from your savior.

“Aren’t we all sometimes?”, he chuckles. “Glad I could be of help, otherwise that would be such a fall.”

“Indeed. Mondays are…Mondays. Suppose my body has been, well, getting used to the routine”, when you realize this handsome man is talking to you, actually engaging to a silly conversation like this, you start to ask yourself if being that far from the single market got you mental.

But this is not a thought shared by Hayden, who, however, does find you a beauty, quite taken with your y/c eyes and your smile.

“It happens to the best of us", he agrees. "Specially after vacations. I'm Hayden, by the way. What's your name? I'm afraid we have not been introduced."

You smile, somewhat shy mostly due to the embarrassment of the situation. Nevertheless, you offer your hand for him to shake. As he takes and shakes it, you speak:

"Nice to meet you, Hayden. I'm Y/N. Are you working with us on this project?"

"Yeah. I got the main role, in fact."

It's when you realize...

"Oh." You try to mask your shock, but Hayden sees it--and truthfully he finds your disconcert adorable. "Of course. Welcome, welcome. It is indeed not a most appropriate moment for us to meet".

"Allow me to disagree, Y/N. The timing could not be better."

One smiles to the other. This is where the fun begins indeed...

***

You should know by now that if a conversation was merely enough you wouldn't keep every single detail running in the back of your head. What are you, 18? But could you help yourself, though?

When you speak, he actually listens; he does pay attention, he is there. He is not asking nonsense questions or anything of the sort. Because Hayden is interested in what you have to say.

Despite finding himself a handsome man whose company often brings you delights, you don't dare to harbor any sort of feelings mostly because of your old scars.

Yet, there is one detail that keeps hammering your head, bringing you to reason so you don’t get yourself too dreamy about it: he is, for all effects, your coworker. Therefore, all he can be for you is a friend.

And you force yourself to content with that.

“Hey Y/N, can I talk to you?”, he asks you one day. There is concern in his eyes, which leads you immediately to wonder it’s related to work, but the way he smiles at you at the same time makes your knees weak.

Oh, holy shit.

“Of course, what is it?”

“I would like to know what are your thoughts about these lines”, he shows you the script. “I’ve been considering changing some to this. Listen up.”

It’s difficult not to be captivated by his passionate speech. You don’t think you’ve met someone as interesting as him, or as intelligent. He loves what he’s doing and is always seeking to improve. You learn from these traits too, aware that you have always to be the best in what you do, but not in a competitive way: only in one where you overcome yourself by getting better daily.

Unbeknownst to you, Hayden appreciates that you do actually hear him, seeing him as who he really is and what he aims to be. You are sincere, kind and decent: qualities he appreciates in a woman.

But because you two are co-workers, all he can do is find excuses to speak to you because insofar he lacks the courage to ask you out. Specially because he’s still unsure how to get himself in a possible relationship after he got divorced—even though he’s been divorced for a long while now.

“I think you are doing a great job”, you tell him after you two share some ideas. “But I also think you are working too hard. I mean, so am I, it’s been crazy days. Do you like coffee?”

And just like that it comes out. You don’t even think twice, it blurts out naturally. Hayden doesn’t see it coming too, finding rather charming the panic that starts to rise in your eyes once you realize what you said.

So it’s reciprocal.

“I do, yes. This weekend my daughter is staying with her mother because it’s her grandparents’ wedding anniversary, which means I’m good with hanging out after work”, his smile spreads when seeing a blush coloring your cheeks. “Does it work for you?”

“Coffee on a Friday evening? 5pm?”

“Yeah.”

“It works just as fine”, you beam.

“Great. I’ll see you soon!”

***

It’s Friday. You try to act casually, giving double focus in your job. But whether you spot him acting or speaking to someone of the crew, your heart races and your body reacts in a teenage manner that makes you blush violently.

You struggle to be discreet but damn it, that owner of such a pair of blue eyes is too handsome. You sigh deep down and there you have it: the return of your romantic side.

“Hello, hello! Back to Earth, Y/N Y/LN”, you hear your boss teasingly calling you.

You don’t know, but there is already gossip between some of the ladies of the production part, because apparently you are not entirely discreet when it comes to Hayden. Naturally, however, no one is speaking it in front of you even if your boss is tempted to tease you about it.

“I’m sorry. I’ve been a little out of…”

“…the radar? Yeah, I can tell. Is there something amiss?”

“Not at all”, you lie. “It’s been an intense week, is all.”

“You’ve been working hard indeed”, he agrees. “Keep going, you’ll go far, my dear”.

He pets your shoulder before leaving you to your thoughts: certainly you didn’t expect to hear such a thing. But what do bosses know?

You sigh. At least Friday is coming soon.

***

Hayden dresses fancifully for this day, even though the coffeeshop you are going is one like Starbucks. He does want to impress you, though. Curious is how he feels alive after a long time off the market for some silly reasons.

But today is the day. Once his filming ends, he comes after you, praying he’s not entirely antiquing in matters of dating. However, every doubt dies when seeing how big your smile is and how sparkly your eyes are. Clearly you don’t know how expressive you can be.

“Hey, Y/N.”

Your heart races when he addresses you. A smile comes naturally as a result.

“Hey, Hayden.”

“Let’s go?”

“Yeah.” As you two walk side by side, you start to wonder whether you are a grown woman or what, because this man makes you weak every time his eyes are set on you. “How was your day?”

As he side eyes discreetly at you, you cannot know that Hayden is thinking almost the same. Charmed by your presence, your enigmatic aura draws him to you, despite his fears of starting a new relationship—or perhaps is he misleading himself in desiring so?

“It was good, thank you for asking. Had fewer scenes today, but those were more intense per usual. I suppose you could tell that because I didn’t have the time to come to you as the rest of the days…”

He smirks at how adorable you look when going pink.

The coffeeshop is not so far, so it doesn’t take you a long time to reach it. Once you do, you and Hayden pick a discreet table that are not too much at the people’s sight.

It’s not until both of you order for black coffee and a piece of lemon cake that you engage in proper conversation.

“Indeed I’ve noticed you’ve been quite busy. That’s what you get for being the main star”, you smirk in tease, pleased for bringing him to laughters.

“What can I do? I try my best”, he responds in an amusing tone.

Does it feel like it’s going too fast? Neither could tell. You and Hayden speak as if you’ve been more than friends over years. Without your notice—or even his—, he takes your hand and gently locks fingers with you.

Between one exchange of glances here, some laughters there, you just know. It’s scary, it’s frightening for sure, but you know.

He is the one.

So what now? Well, you panic internally and opt not to tell anything. Just in case…

***

“You’ve been dating her for what, five weeks now?”, says Ewan when meeting Hayden for some heads up.

“Yeah, I have. She’s a really nice girl, I mean… I haven’t brought to laughters for a long time”, Hayden smiles as he remembers the last date you two had together. “She’s funny and her wit doubles her beauty, you know.”

He chuckles.

“Hayden, my friend”, Ewan places a hand over his friend’s shoulder. “Why are you wasting your time? Ask her to be your girlfriend. I am surprised she’s this patient, honestly.”

“Well me too”, he admits it. “But I wasn’t entirely sure…”

“It’s always appropriate to have some good sense and caution, but fear only holds back for living… Don’t sabotage yourself. Go for it.”

Hayden looks thoughtful, but in truth… Maybe it’s just time to be impulsive again. Or not so impulsive since he comes to discover he’s in love with you.

***

And here come your insecurities again. You start to question yourself whether you got yourself in this too fast, if there’s something wrong with you, or even if you haven’t learned with your previous experiences in failed relationships yet.

All of this because… you’ve been going on several dates with him and nothing gives you the certainty that he corresponds you. At the same time, if this was casual he’d drop you on the first weeks because you are openly against casual sex.

So today you decide to break things with him. You don’t like uncertainties and your heart is already pained with disappointment when Hayden surprises you by paying you a visit right after you had breakfast on a Saturday morning.

“Hey, Y/Nickname. May I come in?”

“Hayden!”, you cannot conceal your surprise and Hayden may have detected your suspicious, perhaps waiting for the worse. “I wasn’t expecting you coming this early! Is everything all right?”

“Yeah, it is. I know this is unexpected but in truth there is something I wanted to talk to you.”

He hesitates, probably waiting for some reaction from you. As you say nothing, he proceeds:

“I know we’ve been hanging out more than a few weeks. I know it may seem I haven’t made my mind yet about us… The truth is always cliche, too predictable to be denied”, he hurries to short the distance between you two.

“Then tell me if it’s worth the waiting, Hayden”, you whisper, staring down to his eyes as he cups your face. “Or else I will leave…”

“No. I am not losing you, Y/N.” He murmurs firmly. “I love you.”

Your eyes go wide and your mind goes blank.

“You w-what? Are you sure? Are…”

He decides to give you an answer that will shush your doubts, doing so by kissing you fervently as he holds you in his arms.

From that day you both held the certainty in your hearts that you two are meant to be…

***

Epilogue: a year later.

Hayden watches as you take his daughter for a horseback ride, proud of how easily you bonded with her. The scene is precious before his eyes.

“Show me that trick again!”, she exclaims at you as you do some magic with a coin you had in the pocket of your jeans.

You are leading her over her mare in a green scenario, mixed with blue skies and different shades of colors that paint the walls of Hayden’s farm house. There, you live with him, occasionally joined by his daughter, precious Brie Rose, whom you get along just fine—and adore like she was your own.

And to spoil her a little more, you do as requested and she is brought to laughters. Not much later, Hayden joins you two.

“What are my favourite women in the world doing?”, he asks, hugging you from behind as he laces his daughter with a free arm, pressing a kiss on top of her head before doing the same to you.

“Riding a horse”, she tells him excitedly. “All by myself, see? Auntie Y/N taught me well.”

You cannot help at how she calls you and giggle softly. Hayden smiles brightly upon the affection she has developed to you.

“You know what, Brie? Do you think we could do this forever?”

When she turns her face to you two, you see a spark in her eyes.

“Of course! What do you think, auntie?”

You giggle quietly.

“That depends of your father, my darling.”

Hayden gently pulls you against him, a smile growing on his lips.

“Is that a yes?”

“When did I ever see refuse you anything, my love?”

And just like that a new beginning rises in the horizon for this family that you grew devoted to. One kiss and unspoken vows are sealed…

[elliehallers]

Characters who are kind pessimists. They're kind because they've experienced The Horrors. 🥰

[evilgirljesus]

I need to know @mothercain s opinions on Lingua Ignota I NEEEEED

[thehellishtrinity]

AF attack for @sassy-tic-tac but I'm posting them here too.

[headintheselbywall]

[battledroidwrites]

“Hello, Snips. I didn’t expect to see you so soon.”

[thirtecnth]

@ofescapisms / closed event starter / hayden liu setting: the lake

"Trust me, the less you know, the better..."

[sassy-tic-tac]

also have a cute hayden and muse inspired by a pinterest pic :]

[paulagnewart]

Trans40mers Pt. 1/12: Of Movies, Muppets and Madman Mayhem!

The grand space year of 2024 may have closed, but the 40th anniversary celebrations for The Transformers are far from being all over.

Not every country got the series at once. These rollouts took time, particularly during decades past. Regions including Australia, New Zealand, Japan, and parts of Europe had to wait until 1985 before the Autobots and Decepticons brought their conflict to local shores. A delay definitely worth the wait for budding fans and shareholders alike.

Keeping in line with the above nations, Australia has consistently kept Transformers on toy shelves since the beginning. No US-style gap years, for there was always something to see, read or buy out there. It's a testament to the brand's longevity and fandom's enduring passion. As the Transformers Universe trailer attested, "They were always real to me".

As seen elsewhere, rather than belt out another year's worth of rodent-based ramblings, this account instead will highlight a slathering of fascinating yet ultimately useless knowledge from Transformers history in Australia. But unlike elsewhere sharing them bang on their respective dates, this account's waiting until month's end for a single, easy to read post.

There's one from each and every year; some glad, some sad, some outright bonkers including (and far from limited to) Mark Wahlberg's Sydney press tour, Otter Press' Dreamwave reprints, that time comedian Tony Martin crushed an Optimus toy on prime time TV, various VHS and DVD releases, newspaper clippings condemning the series, Happy Meal promotions, that time Beast Wars Airazor and Razorclaw toys topped Christmas sales, exclusive toys, and many more.

Best of all? They're free. Yes, free. No social media influenza mentality begging for dollarydoos at each opportunity to read fan wikis aloud here. The title is hardly the most imaginative or inspiring wordplay, but certainly beats the sad, self-aggrandising trend where anyone with half an ego and aspiration for digital fame make a hashtag using their own name.

11th January 2008: Promoting their new release of The Transformers: The Headmasters on DVD, Madman Entertainment choose three winners in its 'Design a Transformer' contest. Among the entrants was late comic book artist Lindsay Walker, with her fan character Ultra Fairmont.

-=-=-=-=-=-

Kicking off this robotic retrospective is a trip back to early 2008. Michael Bay's first live-action film had been an unprecedented success, and companies looked for a slice of that sweet energon pie.

Retro toys were back in, and it's hard to believe there was a time when Madman were the only game in town for 'classic' Transformers merchandise. Having a keen eye for fans since the early 2000's, they produced a swath of licensed G1 and Beast Wars DVD's and apparel. When time came for catering to Japanese audiences, they went all-in, announcing this contest.

Dozens of fans hoping to be the next Alex Kubalsky picked up their artistic tools, logged into their Madman accounts and submitted venerable masterpieces. Of the 46 entries, all-new characters were order of the day, though a few redesigns of old favourites managed to slip through.

So which lucky fans walked away with the top prizes? In first place stood Channandeller and their time-freezing Decepticon saboteur, Time-Ex. Second place went to davetec, who uncovered a long-lost photograph from 1903 featuring the autonomous horseless carriage, Albion. Rounding out third was Norcinu with their evil, mind-controlling Adminbot representative, Comcall. An outstanding trio of well-deserved winners.

The contest was open to casual and professional fans alike, among the latter was rising star Bendigo artist Lindsay Walker. A fan since the Transformers began, Ms. Walker was by that point making a name for herself in the comic book industry. Illustrating both fan and licensed products, her artistic prowess covered the likes of King Kong, Voltron, Sheena, Street Fighter and Hack/Slash. She developed video games, worked art galleries, and proud advocate for the trans community.

After submitting Ultra Fairmont, Ms. Walker went on to fulfil her dream illustrating her beloved Ghost Who Walks for Moonstone Books, and later for the character's local publishers. A career which abruptly ended in tragedy come late September 2016.

17th January 2021: As Covid weaved its deadly web, Sydney's Hayden Orpheum Picture Palace lights the fandom's darkest hour with a screening of 1986's The Transformers: The Movie. Billed as a one night only experience, the event proved popular enough to run multiple times.

-=-=-=-=-=-

"A rare screening of the 1986 animated classic!" proclaimed those fine folks over at Hayden Orpheum; and true to their word, this fateful night had been a long time coming for local fans.

At a time when licensing issues cancelled an earlier Melbourne screening, to say nothing to rising daily Covid cases placing lives and livelihoods at risk, it looked like Aussies may never see the film score an official rerelease. But now they had, and with jubilation came trepidation. Plus jealousy from hardcore fans in other states who'd face mandatory 14 day quarantines.

Despite the brisk drive, the writer of these posts opted not to attend that first night for obvious reasons. But several hundred other fans did, and they had a grand time. Cheering, booing, even recreating the Junkion dance number. A much-needed escape into summer fantasy for many during a perilous period.

For those technical inclined, this edition of the movie was the US 'star cast credits' version, as opposed to the international 'Star Wars Scroll' variant which played at cinemas here back in 1986, & sourced from Madman Entertainment's Blu Ray released June 2009. Spite of being slightly zoomed in to fit the wider cinema screen, nor the option of a crisp physical 35mm print to load up and play, the video was nonetheless an impressive improvement over previous copies.

Unfortunately cracks began to appear when, rather than go with the old Mono track, they used its "enhanced" Dolby 5.1 edition. It made the dialogue pop, but many sound effects (notably when Optimus Prime transforms & takes down the Decepticons) were suppressed, while others replaced by new "improved" sounds. It only got worse from "Megatron must be stopped" right until the film's end, as the entire audio track was delayed by about half a second. Hardly noticeable with the dialogue, but the action suffered. Moments like the satisfying crunch of Prime's uppercut, or the duel between Hot Rod, Kup and the Sharkticons, were painfully out of sync.

27th January 1995: Agro's Cartoon Connection came to the rescue of parents hoping to peacefully sleep off yesterday's public holiday bender. Alongside new host Terasa Livingstone, Agro dedicated our morning to the last ever public TV repeat of The Transformers: The Movie.

-=-=-=-=-=-

What's the deal with The Transformers: The Movie and public holidays?

For years both were invaluably intertwined. A fascinating partnership enough for some imaginative fan to make quite the venn diagram; much like an unspoken yet underlying overlap between followers of both long-running Archie Sonic the Hedgehog comics, and 2003 Teen Titans cartoon.

One month after the Commonwealth Film Censorship Board ordered Spike's expletive outburst be deleted, The Transformers: The Movie arrived in Australian cinemas on Boxing Day 1986. The Sydney Morning Herald ran a colouring contest through Easter 1987, where six lucky readers won a poster plus copy of said movie on VHS or Betamax. Any fans yearning for a nostalgic new year experience got exactly that on 1st January 1989; Channel Seven heeded their wishes and premiered it at 9am.

Despite one critical slamming of "a long advertisement for the fad toys of the 80's", that didn't stop Seven rolling out their cinematic outing again and again. It aired midday Tuesday 25th September 1990, kicking off the spring school holidays. Another repeat followed on Boxing Day 1991. Fans still collecting were treated to double runs in 1993; first at 11:30am on Mother's Day, followed by (surprise surprise) a 9am repeat on Boxing Day, this time one half of a shared feature with Machine Men: Battle of the Rock Lords.

Fast-forward to 1995. A year had passed since all states and territories agreed to mark 26th January a national public holiday. Fireworks were lit and alcohol guzzled, leading to many-a sore heads the following morning. For kids not tuning in to watch the last TV screening of DiC's The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog among the rotting husk of Tim Bailey's The Big Breakfast, once more Australia's favourite bathmat offered salvation. Kicking off at 6:30am where, following a mandatory repeat of Hanna-Barbera's The Ruff and Reddy Show, Agro and Terasa's Friday morning movie successfully ruined a nation's childhoods one final time.

[gifsbysimplysonia]

Me: reads an alleged account of a fan encounter with a celebrity from a person who is a BNF and has been caught out in LOTS of and HUGE lies (has the celeb's phone number, was hired by and working with the team [even though they still pay for all of their travel/accommodations/experiences at cons])

Me after reading the alleged account:

I know fandoms tend to let these types of delulus alone BECAUSE they provide content (photos, videos, fiction [yes that's a read]) but please believe me when I tell you that there is a reckoning coming for these types of fans sooner rather than later. Content is not worth allowing people to

A) lie on celebrities who are generous with their time and KIND TO EVERYONE, not just some alleged chosen one

B) take advantage of the more gullible and naive members of our fandom

We have GOT to start calling this behavior out and protecting each other from it. Misinformation, lying and manipulation are taking too much from us. And fandom is supposed to be a fun and safe space.

Sigh.

[saiwola]

A thought. But characters with "life" powers laughing. Not soft polite chuckles, but roaring laughter. The kind where they're crying a bit. The image and sound of it bringing forth this added sense of warmth and light that you can only get when the embodiment of life itself is laughing.

That is all.