#having to be the adult when talking to your parents really fucking sucks
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sonechkaandthedynamos · 1 year ago
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pantestudines · 1 year ago
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having a "former gifted kid" type mental spiral
#i say this because the spiral is actually about how much i hate the word and the general culture around giftedness#mostly because its incredibly inconsistent between schools so people often mean different things when they say it#but also because in my specific case its certainly not a gift but like. what am i supposed to call it.#its literally a neurodivergence in my case that has had many effect postive and negative on my life. but its also a school club.#and its also nothing! before the advent of like modern standardized public education i wouldve just been a curious kid#Without modern public education im not sure i wouldve even been different from other kids. maybe a little socially awkward still but idk#and like. Am i really different from other kids? am I now as an adult different from my peers? Occasionally i will get told as such#how the fuck am i suppose to talk about how much being seperated from my peers and held to higher standards sucked#when the name of the reason why this happened might as well be 'gods specialist little boy'#none of the things that make people think im smarter are really all that useful day to day. and most non-gifted people are like. still smar#i happen to be good at memorizing the kind of facts schools test you on as children#but is that just because i was told as a kid to be good at school and so i tried hard to do that?#even if I am uniquely good at that#does that really make me more intelligent than the high school dropouts who can fix cars like its nothing?#in fact i would say they are at least wiser than me for picking something practical to be smart at#at my school being gifted usually implied you were a little neurodivergent and bad at socializing#often our gifted kids were actually failing classes because they were smart enough to realize they didnt matter#(not me but still)#but at some schools being gifted just means you were an avid reader or were pressured by your parents to maintain perfect As at all times#so if i say. wanted to talk about how being 'gifted' has often made some aspects of academia like hating emails and having time blindness#and not having a good friend network and having many unadressed issues around not really knowing how to make friends#if i wanted to talk about that. and i say 'I was gifted growing up and this sucked'#the person on the other end might hear 'oh woe is me im so smart and this makes my life so hard'#AND FURTHER STILL#on tumblr especially 'former gifted kid' has kindve become parlance for 'guy whining about nothing'#or even 'person who they were told was smart but is actually kinda dumb'#which... yeah! theres a reason many former gifted kids are like that! thats kindve my issue with the program in the first place!#it takes otherwise relatively normal if well achieving kids and tells them they are gods specialist little children.#THIS CANNOT BE HELPFUL TO ANYONE? like whatever chance the kids had at seeming normal has been stripped away#and they now also think they are the smartest person in the room in every situation
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ahundredtimesover · 5 months ago
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Hold Me Closer | JJK
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Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader (ft. brother Jimin)
Genre/Tags: brother’s best friends au; slight angst, fluff, smut
Warnings: foul language, alcohol consumption; kitchen emergency; eldest child feels, adulting; explicit sexual content (making out, oral m & f receiving, unprotected sex but be safe please!); Seven JK (18+)
Word count: 19.2k
Read Part 1: Hold Me Close
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Summary: When you're asked to look after your parents' house and meet them before they go on vacation, you, Jimin, and Jungkook take the trip to your hometown of Busan and relive memories of your youth. While your new relationship has you feeling like a lovesick teenager with all the affection that Jungkook shows you, you're still you - a professional trying to make it in the corporate world, and an eldest child trying not to disappoint her parents. And that turns out to be your undoing, as a little blunder causes a rift between you and Jungkook, resulting in a trip that you might as well have messed up... Not if your brother can help it, though.
Listen to 🎵: Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional
Playlist 🎶: High School Playlist
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A/N 1: I know I said I’d be on a break but I reread Hold Me Close and found comfort in this Jungkook 🥹 so I went ahead and wrote this little piece! Whipped and comforting boyfriend JK is what I needed so I hope you enjoy this 💕
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Six - the number of work calls you’ve already taken in the last hour, with each one of them lasting one whole song. Jungkook calculates that you’ve spent half of the entire drive since leaving Seoul talking with your boss about some report that he somehow can’t complete without you, which sucks because Jungkook was really looking forward to this road trip with you and his best friend.
You groan after you hang up and the clackity clack of the keyboard continues. He was hoping to hold your hand while he drove and maybe sing with you some of your favorite songs that he put on but it doesn’t seem like those will happen anytime soon. You’re immersed in your work but he guesses you have to be; the sooner this ends, the sooner your focus will be on him and this present moment.
He finds the positive side of it at least. He gets to listen to you explain things - why the numbers are what they are, what targets you reached, and what risks you managed. It’s quite silly but it’s kind of a turn on, hearing you talk about something you know like the back of your hand, pretty much proving to your crap of a boss how good you are at your job and why you’re an asset to the company. You know your shit, and you have a classy way of making sure they know that you do. 
Six calls, and Jungkook already knows half of your project report. And perhaps he’ll know more, as the seventh one comes.
You let it ring for one, two, three times, as you hold your phone in one hand while you continue to type away with the other. 
“I swear to god, ___. If you don’t pick that up, I’m  gonna throw your phone out of this car,” Jimin, who’s comfortably seated in the backseat, growls. 
The dramatics is understandable because one, it’s Jimin and two, the constant ringing is a little bit much.
“___, I’m not fucking kiddi—”
“Hello, sir,” you finally answer, then proceed to discuss this month’s analytics and projections for the succeeding quarter.
Jungkook predicts it’s gonna take you another whole song to finish, so he instead focuses on the road and appreciates the clear skies and familiar scenery of the drive to Busan. His thoughts go to how these next several days are gonna go. There’s visiting your favorite spots growing up, going to a resort, staying in to eat and play video games, and of course, cuddling with you in your room, as you and Jimin will have your parents’ house to yourselves once they leave for their anniversary trip in two days.
His musings are disrupted though, when he looks at the rear view mirror and sees Jimin’s annoyed face blocking his view. Jungkook can’t help but laugh, especially when he hears his best friend grumbling complaints just behind him.
“Leave her be, she’ll be done soon,” Jungkook dismisses him. “They sound like important stuff.”
“She’s talking so loudly!” Jimin groans. “I just want to reminisce and sing along to our teenage emo music, Kook.”
Jungkook turns the music off. 
“There, I paused it. You can sing along once she’s done speaking on the phone,” he says.
Jimin pouts in response. “You always take her side. You weren’t like this when we were kids.”
“Well, if it means anything, I always took her side. I just never told you,” Jungkook laughs.
“Traitor.”
“I’m literally your most loyal friend.”
It’s a statement that Jimin can’t counter. Jungkook is his most loyal friend. And the most supportive. And the most dependable. And definitely the one who’s never left his side. 
When Jimin casually told their group that he likes girls and boys, Jungkook was the only one who didn’t need time to “warm up to the idea.” Jungkook was also the only one who never disappeared whenever he had a girlfriend. He was also the one who never missed a single one of Jimin’s dance showcases in college and professional shows. 
And of course, Jungkook was the one friend who took up his offer to drink that Friday afternoon, resulting in that infamous gutter incident - as you like to call it - and his subsequent unemployment and homelessness. While you, his beloved sister, were there to pick up the pieces, so was Jungkook, the way he promised he would after they became friends at 10 years old. 
Those months when Jimin was heartbroken and unsure of what he was going to do with his life, his best friend was there to make sure that he wasn’t going to lose his drive and love for dancing. His best friend is also the one constantly cheering him up about this long-distance relationship that he decided to have with Taehyung while others continue to be a skeptic.
Jungkook is that friend, and Jimin supposes he can forgive the other man every time he sides with you.
Jimin is about to complain again when you put the phone down and make one of your restrained cries. He pities you, but it doesn’t change the fact that he wishes you wouldn’t be doing your work stuff while you’re on a trip of what’s supposed to be a mini-break.
“I don’t get why you don’t pick up after the first ring,” he huffs. 
“It’s so Mr. Soo knows that I’m not easily available,” you say. 
“But you are. You answer it anyway,” Jimin rolls his eyes.
“Exactly, I’m gonna answer it anyway. Might as well make him wait for it because he needs me,” you point out. “It’s bad enough that he’s calling while I’m taking the leave he approved, so I’m just pissing him off. He doesn’t know I changed the prompt to leave me a voice message to an annoying song so he’ll have to sit through it to get to me. I already know it’s getting on his nerves.”
“Ooh, petty. I like that,” Jimin hums. 
“I know. I got that from you,” you proudly smile.
“But why are you even working?” He whines, your brother’s tone more of pity than annoyance. “It totally defeats the purpose of a leave. And you shouldn’t be indulging him!”
“Well, Mr. Soo approved this leave thinking that Chul would help him craft this report, which is based on the project that I proposed, only to realize that he doesn’t know shit about it because I wrote everything, and he just took the credit,” you explain. “I don’t want to be doing this, too, but I also just took the chance to show who’s driving the wheel, and it’s definitely me. Plus, I worked hard for that project. Working on the report at least gives me a chance to give myself credit for it.”
“Hmm, I guess you’re right,” Jimin concedes. “Your voice is just so loud.”
“I’m sorry. I just wanted to match his tone,” you say. “But he’ll be in a meeting for the next hour or so and he probably won’t need me again until then. You can turn the music back on.”
“Ugh, thank god,” Jimin groans again. “I missed my favorite song.”
He leans forward and squeezes himself in the small space between you and Jungkook. The proximity causes Jimin to smack his elbow on your face, which you know is intended, considering how much of a brat he is. So you do what you always do - flick the back of his head. 
He yells but gets over it once he manages to press the rewind button and plays the song he’s been wanting to hear. You haven’t been paying attention throughout the drive and hadn’t even known what they were listening to, but once the music comes on, a wave of nostalgia hits you.
You take the CD case you see in the compartment and scan the song list.
“Dashboard Confessional?” You read out. “Mayday Parade? Something Corporate?”
You go through 2 other CDs and look at both men questioningly. 
“These are literally plucked out of my high school playlist that I illegally downloaded,” you state, given that music streaming sites weren’t a thing over a decade ago. “Why do you have them in CDs? And did you even know these songs back then?”
“Yes, because we listened to your playlist when you weren’t around,” Jimin confesses, earning him a flick on the arm. 
“You went through my computer? You were in my room?!” You yell.
“Don’t be dramatic,” Jimin rolls his eyes. “It was a boring room, there was nothing to see. We just wanted your music because they were cool, but I’d never admit it.”
“I’m sure,” you shake your head. “But it was my ex, remember? He was a new kid from the US and he got me into these emo rock bands and I thought they were cool, too. He downloaded them illegally for me and I just jammed to those songs all the time even after we broke up.”
“We know. Jungkook and I could hear it from my bedroom,” Jimin says, “which is why we used to sneak in and listen when you weren’t around.”
“Is that why you put them in a mixtape? So you could listen to them whenever you wanted?” You ask, turning to Jungkook because between the both of them, he’s definitely the one who’d know how to do this.
“Yeah, Kook. Why did you make these mixtapes when neither of us had a portable CD player… but my sister did?” Jimin presses, cocked eyebrow and smug face on display.
You’re looking at him now, and it’s a curious look that Jungkook can’t resist.
“I just thought to put your most played ones in CDs,” he shyly admits, “and uh, planned on giving them to you before you left for college. But I chickened out so I just left them in a box in my room that I brought to Seoul. I’d forgotten all about it until Jimin raided my studio and found them.”
“You… you made me mixtapes? When you were 15?” You ask.
“___, I think I’ve established enough that I had a huge crush on you when I was a teenager,” he turns to you and laughs. 
It’s a little embarrassing even if he’s already dating you. It still feels surreal sometimes, as he thinks of his growing up years and how he always looked forward to sleeping over at Jimin’s place and then catching glimpses of you. There were the times when you’d watch movies with them in the living room, and then he’d help you clean up in the kitchen so he could spend more time with you.
That was over 10 years ago and so much has changed, but the admiration he felt for you never dwindled. There was always that image of you looking happy. He kept that version of you in his mind, even when you had your boyfriends. He just wanted to remember your smile, and now he gets to be the reason for it, like now.
“It’s just… it’s very sweet and thoughtful,” you say softly. 
“I… Well… I took interest in the things you liked. I guess that happens when you like someone.”
“Told you he’s a romantic,” Jimin nudges you. 
Between the fairy tattoo he designed and did on your shoulder, the dinner and picnic dates he takes you to despite both your busy schedules, and the way he holds you so close to him whenever and wherever he can, you can definitely say that Jungkook is a romantic.
It’s only been three months but it feels as if you’ve been dating him for longer, given the overflow of affection he’s been giving you. It’s in the way he always holds your hand and kisses you so passionately. It’s in his encouraging words and the way he spoils you with the littlest things. 
It’s refreshing to be with him. He has boyish charms that have become even sexier with his slightly long hair and the lip ring that he recently got. And whatever he’s wearing, there’s just something so comfortably sexy about him that’s both warm and exciting, and you often find yourself swarmed in butterflies whenever he talks about you.
It’s only been three months but it’s a relationship you’re still slowly being open about. Your friends were definitely surprised. Hoseok fell off the couch with all his body movements; Jin spat out his drink; Yoongi gasped, then followed it up with a teasing smirk; So-Hee and Na-eun gushed over how Jungkook treats you, and took the chance to say how he’s gotten more handsome over the years. 
You asked them if it was that shocking for you to be dating someone younger - and your brother’s best friend at that - and while they said it was a bit unexpected, what really got them was how different Jungkook is from your exes. He’s not some corporate man with ambitions, they pointed out. His life is less structured, too, given his freelancing career and gig at the tattoo parlor. He’s definitely a lot more laid-back and more casual than they’re used to. 
They were short of remarking that Jungkook’s lifestyle isn’t as stable and secure as what you normally go for, and they wouldn’t be wrong. It’s a thought you’ve had before, and something even he brought up because he didn’t want you thinking that he can’t keep up with you. But you’d been the one to point out to your friends that stability can come in different forms. With how Jungkook has been so dependable and assuring, that’s given you more security than you ever thought. 
But it’s not something that’s easy to explain. Maybe your friends could understand. They’ve made careers in different industries, after all, with short term jobs forming part of their resume. But your parents are of a different generation and mindset. Stability for them means one thing, and they raised you to want the same thing in the same way. 
Which is why it’s already been three months, and you still haven’t told them about you and Jungkook. 
“I started young,” he laughs, pulling you out of your thoughts as he takes your hand and interlocks his fingers with yours. “I used to just choose my moments of romance but with you, I’m romantic all the time.”
“Really? Does being a flirt count as being romantic?” You cock an eyebrow.
Because that’s what he is. He likes to tease and call you out when he affects you. He likes to charm and then edge you until you’re pleading for him to do more. 
“Definitely! I mean, I’m out here living my teenage dream, you know?” He winks at you. “Not just anyone gets to say that they’re dating the person they had a crush on when they were 13.”
“Oh god, here we go again,” Jimin groans, earning him a laugh from you and Jungkook.
But even if your brother fake-gags at your not-so private displays of affection, you know deep down that he’s happy for you and his best friend. The two most important people in his life found comfort in each other, and he gets to witness and bask in that. 
He also gets to brag that it all happened because of him. 
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You spend the next hour jamming to all your favorite emo rock songs because Jungkook wasn’t kidding - he really did include all of the ones you had on repeat from your playlist. It takes you back to over 10 years ago of playing the music so loud while you’re in your pajamas, jumping on your bed and singing your lungs out. They don’t really remind you of your ex-boyfriend. That was a short-lived relationship that only really had you appreciating the songs he shared and not much more. 
Your boss doesn’t reach out to you until a half hour later. He’s taken to sending you messages instead, and when he does, you’re back to typing away on your laptop, to the displeasure of both men. 
They don’t call you out this time and instead leave you be. Until, of course, it hinders you from enjoying yourself.
The car has stopped but you’re still on your laptop, double checking figures. Jimin has stepped out after telling you that he’ll throw your laptop in the ocean if you don’t stop, but Jungkook stays with you inside the car. He bops his head and hums to the music that neither of you could barely hear. He picks on his fingers and yelps at the hangnail he pulls out. He opens the window and shoos away a bug, then hangs out his head to feel the late morning sun.
“Kook, you can go out if you’re bored,” you say, your eyes still glued to your screen. “You don’t have to stay with me here.”
“But I want to,” he responds. “I’m not leaving until you do, not when you said we’re spending the week free from work and stress.”
“I just need to get this done,” you sigh, rechecking your stats for the third time and then aligning the table. “I’ll be finished soon.”
“You said that 15 minutes ago,” he points out, not wanting to sound like he’s complaining, although he might as well be. 
“It’s just—”
“You’ve done your part, babe. You’ve encoded the figures and cross-checked the targets and objectives. Writing the rest of that report and formatting it isn’t your job anymore,” Jungkook says. “You weren’t even supposed to do those. You’re not on the clock. You’re on leave, and you deserve this break.”
“I hate that I have to work, too, but it’s not something I just can’t do, not when my boss is calling and expecting me to do all this,” you groan. 
You see his eyebrows furrow and you get defensive. 
“You know what, nevermind. You work solo, you answer to no one, you don’t have to prove yourself to corporate assholes. You won’t get it.”
You sigh once more and return to reviewing the conclusion, but the sudden silence is unnerving. You glance at Jungkook and see the look on his face - it’s not sadness but disappointment, and it’s one you don’t see very often on him.
You’re about to apologize when he speaks, his voice soft and low, as if speaking is difficult for him.
“I work with so many clients on a daily basis, with more than half of them setting deadlines that they don’t even follow and demanding so many things so yes, I get it,” he says. “But I put my foot down when I need to, because I learned a long time ago that I shouldn’t let people walk all over me. I know you’re up against a lot of things and you may feel like your hands are tied but they aren’t. A break won’t hurt you. And you know you deserve it. We deserve your attention, too.”
Your heart cracks at his words. Even more at the way he looks, as you see that all he wants is to spend time with you. He’s been busy, too. He’s spent the last few nights at his studio, buried deep in his projects because he said he wanted to focus on you this week. And you know that he’ll keep his word like he always does. Jungkook is dedicated to his work but he focuses on you when he says he will. You’re the one not loyal to what you say.
“Kook, I’m—”
“Just do what you have to do,” he interjects, his eyes downcast now. “I’ll be outside with Jimin. Come out when you’re done. You like it here, so don’t worry. We won’t leave until you’ve come down.”
Jungkook exits the car before you can say anything. You watch him walk down the stony path towards the ocean.
You hadn’t even realized you’re here. 
You’re at Cheongsapo, with the pebble beach just meters away being one you all went to as kids. Jungkook’s older brother used to drive you here during summer, and you all enjoyed the calmness of the place. You used to bet on who would treat ice cream by playing rounds of stone skipping, with Jimin winning every single time. You remember how you and Jungkook taught each other how to do it, and then tag-teamed against your brother so he could finally treat you both that one time. 
Whenever you’d visit Busan during your college breaks, you’d always come down here with your friends, with Jungkook and Jimin in tow. You’d visit at sunset and hold out your sparklers, then navigate the terrain at night and laugh about who tripped and slipped on the way back. 
Jungkook’s right. You like this place. It holds so many memories of your youth, and you find yourself constantly reminiscing, as you try to recall his place in your life back then. 
You mentally smack yourself. He didn’t deserve your dismissal. He didn’t deserve the way you spoke to him. He’s been trying to help, especially with how busy you’ve been these past several weeks. You were supposed to work from home while you housesat your parents’ house but Jimin convinced you to take your untouched leaves when Jungkook decided to come, and then they both called it a mini-break.
And maybe you need it, considering that all this preoccupation with work has caused you to snap at your boyfriend when all he wanted to do was ease your mind.
So you get out of the car and head to him. 
There’s a small forest to pass through and a steep staircase to maneuver, but you manage. You look out to see Jimin already throwing stones and Jungkook standing by, reacting to every gliding pebble on the water. You spare a few seconds to admire him from the back, with his plain white shirt and light gray lounge pants, accentuating a figure that has you weak in the knees. His hands are in his pockets and his slightly long locks are in a half-bun, and he looks every bit of comfort in this place that holds so much of your years growing up.
You walk to where he is and wrap your arms around him from behind. He stills but he doesn’t say anything. You savor his natural scent and the way the tips of his hair tickle your face. You bask in the taut figure that somehow softens under your touch. Once you feel him relax a little, you tilt your head and whisper in his ear. 
“I’m sorry for snapping at you. You didn’t deserve that.”
He remains quiet and unmoving. All you can hear are the sounds of the waves and Jimin’s cheering from some meters away.
“I just got caught up with work but I’m done with it. It wasn’t right of me to neglect you when I promised I was gonna take a break and spend time with you,” you continue.
Your voice is low and Jungkook could hear your pout. Just a little bit more and he’ll give in.
“You look so hot today and I just want to—”
“Yah!” He whines, finally returning your affection and caressing your arms that are now wrapped around him tightly. “Don’t tease me.”
“Hmm, that caught your attention, huh?” You giggle, lightly kissing his neck.
He shivers at the act, and he laughs at himself for how whipped he is for you, giving in so quickly.
“You know it would,” he huffs, turning around to face you now.
You still have that pout and he just wants to kiss it off you.
“How was walking down the steep staircase?” He asks, knowing that was your only non-favorite thing about this place. 
“I tripped on a step but I’m fine,” you proudly smile now. 
“You should’ve called me,” he frowns now. 
“But you were upset with me!”
“So? Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t help you down the stairs and risk you tripping. You know how those steps are. And the pebbles can sometimes be slippery. You can trip here, too, and— what?”
“Nothing. You’re sexy when you’re worried about me,” you say nonchalantly.
“Ugh, come here,” he groans, pulling you in a hug, one that you fall into immediately. “I’ll always worry about you. And I’ll always help you, even if I’m upset.”
“I know,” you sigh. “I’m sorry again. But I’ve laid off the report now. I told Mr. Soo I shall not be disturbed anymore for the rest of my leave.”
“Good,” Jungkook hums, pulling away to face you now. “Because I really want to know what you wanted to do.”
“Ah, many things, Jeon Jungkook,” you smirk. “But I’ll maybe settle for this first.”
You lean in and kiss him - deep enough to have him moan against your lips, and you suddenly can’t wait until you can do more.
“Oh, my eyes!” Jimin squeals, prompting you to look at him with his arm covering his face.
Jungkook only laughs but you scowl at your brother.
“You’re so dramatic,” you roll your eyes. “You’ve seen worse.”
“And I’ve erased that image of my sister and my best friend swallowing each other’s faces from my mind. Please don’t remind me again,” he groans. “But anyway, are you tolerable again?”
“Yes,” you frown. “I think,” you mutter, turning to Jungkook.
“You’re alright,” he teases, before he wraps his arm around you and pulls you close. “Now Jimin here wants to reassert his dominance as the stone-skipping king. You game for a match?”
“Do I have a choice?” You cock your eyebrow.
“No. So okay, same rules,” your brother announces. “Loser treats everyone to coffee and pastry. We all know it won’t be me.”
“Brat,” you say under your breath. 
But he’s not wrong. He dominates and Jungkook ends up losing. The wink he makes tells you he let you win. And though you like to play fair, you won’t lie and say his teasing smirk definitely turned you on.
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You spend the rest of your morning enjoying iced coffee while overlooking the beach, then you head to your favorite seafood restaurant for lunch. You go to your usual market for ingredients for the week, including tonight’s dinner that your mother will be preparing. She wanted to cook for all of you before they flew out, she said, and that got you excited. 
It’s refreshing to walk through the streets and spots of your childhood and reminisce with your brother and boyfriend. The memories take on different forms this time, as Jungkook tells you things from his perspective. 
You remember that one time you scolded them for sneaking out on a school night and then picking them up at an alley with Jin driving you. Jungkook says he liked how caring and understanding you were then; you said you’d cover for them after flicking their foreheads. 
There’s that summer when you got your friends to buy from Jimin and Jungkook’s ice pop stand so they could buy these skateboards that neither of your parents wanted to get for them. Jungkook recalls how you complimented his recipe and told everyone he made them so that they’d praise him, too. 
There’s that winter when, after your brother’s begging, you had him and Jungkook join you and your friends’ bonfire night at one of your secret beach spots. Jungkook points out that you always made sure that as the youngest ones there, they were warm and well-fed. 
And then there were their sleepovers when you’d join them play video games and watch horror movies in the living room. Jungkook gushes at how pretty you looked and how you’d always prepare them popcorn and drinks. He outs you as the one who puts the blanket over him and Jimin when they fall asleep on the couch. 
“I tend to forget a lot of things but I remember when they’re about you,” he mumbles as he starts the drive to your house. “It’s just always stuck with me. Please don’t be weirded out.”
You giggle but assure him that you aren’t. You understand him - there are things and people and moments that naturally stick with you, and they’re the ones you hold dear, too. 
He was a kid with a crush and his attention was often on you, and you suppose that given how you’d felt comfortable around him then, it was also maybe natural that you’d feel the same way now that you’re both older. It just so happened that he ended up looking as attractive as he did, and that’s just an added bonus. 
Jungkook drops you and Jimin home before he drives three blocks away to his parents’ house. He’ll greet them first before heading to your place, he says, excited for your mom’s cooking that he always enjoyed. 
It’s been some time since you last saw them. They don’t always drive out to Seoul, only doing so to watch Jimin’s shows, and you haven’t had time to go home, either. Plus, you had an injured brother to take care of, and he’s also really the topic of every conversation you’ve had with them these past months. 
And there are no bad feelings there. He’s had injuries and illnesses that had them worried, and you’re pretty much as unproblematic and predictable as any eldest child could get. You think you’re that monotonous or unexciting, too, and you suppose that just meant they didn’t feel the need to check on you as much as they did with Jimin.
But you express your longing once they offer you their hugs. You say how you miss your mom’s cooking and your dad’s baking, which is code for saying that you’ve missed them, too. 
You get your stuff to your room and sigh in relief at the comfort it still gives you. Not much has changed between your double bed, your desk, your beanbag, and the large cork board of photos on your wall. You pin the Polaroids from earlier, deciding to keep the ones of you and Jungkook for your place back in Seoul. 
You huff this time, unsure how you’ll open the discussion of you dating your younger brother’s best friend to your parents. They’ve known him since he was a kid; they watched him get into all kinds of trouble with their son, and were there for his milestones, too. 
Jungkook was always Jimin’s partner-in-crime; they were two peas in a pod who went through everything together. Now it’s you and him and you don’t really know how they’ll take it. 
But you brush it off for now and think it’s a conversation for later, or maybe when they come back from their trip. You intended on telling them in person, which is why they’re still in the dark. It’s just a matter of how you’ll say it.
You head downstairs and take in the scent of seafood soft tofu stew. The two boys are already at the kitchen counter, munching on the rolled omelet that they shouldn’t even be having yet. But your mom lets them, as Jimin talks about his new agency and shows videos of him doing some choreographies.
You stand next to Jungkook, who sneakily feeds you. You don’t know why you get flustered at the act, even more when he whispers in your ear. 
“So, I finally get to see your room with your permission,” he cheekily smiles. “I promised Jimin a few rounds of Overwatch before going to you.”
You merely laugh and tell him that your dad’s asking him something.
“So, Jungkook. How has work been? Jimin tells us you’ve been getting more projects recently,” your old man asks. 
“Ah, yes, uncle,” he responds. “I’m getting more clients and exposure now. It took a while but it’s all going well.”
“That’s good. Although I always wondered why you never thought of joining a firm. Doesn’t that mean a more consistent client base? And better for you financially, too.”
“Well, I get to choose my clients and my projects as a freelancer,” Jungkook explains. “I control my time. And it allows me to take appointments at the tattoo parlor.”
“Oh, right, your hobby,” your dad nods. “I guess having multiple sources of income is the new trend these days.”
Jungkook just hums in agreement, already used to your dad’s frame of thought when it comes to a career. So are you, because it’s often the first thing he picks up on with your boyfriends. Each of your partners just happened to be working in corporate so there was never this line of questioning followed by an awkward silence. 
But Jungkook is just your brother’s best friend, as far as they know. You wonder how they’d react once you finally tell them the truth.
You don’t completely fault your dad, though. It’s less about judgment and more about practicality. He and your mom came from the generation that believed survival and security mattered more than passion. They always thought the latter could come later on in life, which is why they opened their own cafe not long ago, at a time when they were already pretty secure. You suppose it’s his way of looking out for you, which is why he’s always been concerned about your partner’s occupation.
The conversation changes, as the focus now turns to your parents and what they’ve been up to. You assist your mom in the kitchen while the men hang around, helping when they’re called upon. Jungkook stands near you, asking if you need him and attempting to feed you with a dumpling this time, but you manage to feed yourself and he merely looks at you in understanding.
Dinner is finally ready and you all head to the dining table. You take the seat next to your mom, across from Jungkook, and he looks at you curiously but you offer him an apologetic smile. You only told him that you’ll tell your parents about your relationship in person, which you planned on doing. 
That is, until your parents bring up your friends.
“Sweetie, Jin’s son is so adorable,” your mom chirps. “I saw the pictures on Facebook and the little one took after his father so much. I can imagine how happy he and his wife are.”
The topic of your dear friend and his family injects energy into you. You say how Jin’s been bragging about his mini-me but that the nursery you helped put together looks so beautiful. You were all there when his wife gave birth a few weeks ago and though you’re still unsure about having kids, you won’t deny how much it warmed your heart when Seo-yoon’s tiny fingers wrapped around your thumb. It’s not something you say though, as your mom eventually mentions Na-eun and her fiancé. 
“I read that he’s been promoted as Director of their company,” she says. 
Your dad pipes in that So-Hee’s new boyfriend is apparently the son of one of his former colleagues, and you’re quite frankly over the conversations about your friends’ partners. The insinuations aren’t lost on you.
“How do you even know these things?” You groan.
“Facebook,” your mom replies. “Of course I’m friends with all your friends. And it’s nice to know how well they’re doing since we don’t get to see them much anymore. You’ve reached that age of settling down, after all.”
“I guess,” you hum, no longer interested in the conversation. Jimin’s roll of his eyes tells you he feels the same. “Lots of good things are happening for them.”
You don’t mean to sound bitter and you aren’t. You adore your friends and genuinely love that things are looking out for them. You’re not the same person from months ago who felt lost and falling behind amongst them. Sure, things could be better career-wise, but you haven’t felt this much security in yourself and your relationship until Jungkook. Explaining why is a different thing altogether.
“What about you?” Your dad asks. “I know we’ve been calling every week to ask about your brother but we haven’t been checking in on you. I’m sorry, dear,” he continues, his eyes softening. “Is there anything new in your life?”
If the earlier conversations hadn’t happened, perhaps you’d willingly hint on the newest thing in your life, which is the relationship you have with the man currently looking at you with his doe-eyes in anticipation. 
But they did, and you know mentioning your friends’ partners was their way of subtly pressuring you about being with someone of similar stature. And you’re not really in the mood for that right now. 
So you end up doing the stupidest thing you possibly could, and that’s to lie. 
“Not really,” you say, hating the prolonged silence that follows. 
And as you look at Jungkook across from you, you see his face fall, and you hate even more that it’s because of you. 
Your lack of a follow-up prompts your parents to move on. They know that when you’re in the mood to talk, you will and when you’re quite passive, it means you aren’t. 
Your mom turns to Jungkook instead and asks him what else he’s up to other than his various jobs and looking after Jimin. He looks at you before his gaze shifts towards them.
“Not much else, auntie,” he replies. 
The crack of your heart knows you completely messed up, because if it stings like this, then you know it hurt him even more.
“Oh, is there no one special in your life?” She asks, as she often does. Given that she treats Jungkook as part of the family, she’s lost all filter when it comes to him, too. “I recently met with my friend and her daughter. She’s such a lovely young woman, Kook, she’s brilliant and oh so charming. She’s in Busan for the week, too. Do you want to—”
“Is it time for dessert?” Jimin butts in, not wanting this conversation to continue. 
He knows Jungkook wouldn’t know how to turn your mother down, and if he even slightly entertains the idea to appease her, you’d be the one upset, even if you technically put this upon yourself. Jimin already sees you a bit uncomfortable, and if there’s anything he can do to not make this worse for you and his best friend, it’s to be a brat. 
“Oh, yes. Your father made an apple pie and some ice cream,” she says. “Let me—”
“I’ll get it,” you offer, standing up from your seat now.
You don’t want to know what your mom’s other propositions would be. You’re sure she’ll find some person’s son to match you with, given that she’s done that a few times after your breakup with Namjoon. You’re also not ready for Jungkook to agree with her about meeting someone, even if you know he won’t mean it.
Which is really stupid because if you’d just told them the truth, then you’ll be having a completely different conversation, although you’re unsure if you’re ready for that one, too. But at least Jungkook wouldn’t look as upset as he does right now, as he’s resorted to picking on his food instead of finishing it, which tells you that he’s lost his appetite and that’s never a good thing. 
You go to the kitchen to slice the pie and scoop the ice cream. You do it so slowly to lengthen the time before you’re back there, only because you don’t want to know what else they’re talking about. 
You’re in the middle of cursing yourself when you feel the sting of a tiny pinch on your arm, and you yelp in pain and smack your brother’s chest in reflex.
“Ow!” You yell, frowning at the man before you and ignoring your mother’s order to “behave,” even if they’re used to you two quarreling. 
“You deserve that,” Jimin scowls at you. “Because what the fuck was that?!”
“I know,” you sigh, glancing at Jungkook who’s trying his best to be interested in what your parents are saying. “I… froze. You know what they wanted to hear, Chim. All those things about my friends’ boyfriends and what they do? I just didn’t want them to compare them to what Jungkook does if I tell them.”
“Why, what’s wrong with what he does?” Your brother raises an eyebrow.
“Nothing. It’s just… you know how focused they are on career stability and shit like that,” you try to explain. “You heard what dad was telling him earlier. I just didn’t want Jungkook to hear any underhanded comments from them and then feel bad about it.”
“And you think denying that you’re dating is any better?” He chides. “That’s literally worse!”
“I—”
“Jungkook knows how our parents are. And after you got together, he already anticipated that they’d question how he’ll be able to sustain your life together once you told them about your relationship,” Jimin explains. “He was ready for it. I doubt he anticipated this…”
You stand there, the crack in your heart getting deeper and bigger as the seconds pass. You hadn’t realized that Jungkook was already confiding in Jimin about any concerns he’d have about facing your parents. You suppose he would, given that you said you’d tell them when you saw them the one time that Jungkook asked if they knew, and you didn’t raise it again after. Living in your bubble together seemed more important, and you’d forgotten to mentally prepare yourself for this conversation.
“Chim, I fucked up,” you pout. 
If it were about anything else, Jimin would push it. It’s how you always were, and you’ve reached that point  in your relationship where you could call each other out and know it comes from a good place. But he doesn’t want to do this today, not when you’re already sad and guilty and he doesn’t want you to feel worse. He doesn’t want to take sides, even if he’ll admit that you were in the wrong, but he doesn’t want to antagonize you either.
“Hey,” he nudges your arm. “It’s not the end of the world. You’re both gonna figure it out. I don’t know how hard he’ll take this but he’s a really soft-hearted person, so just… keep that in mind, okay?”
You nod, wanting to believe that you’ll be able to fix it. 
“And don’t hate yourself too much,” your brother adds. “He’s really, really into you. I just know he won’t be able to resist you.”
You nod again but you think that just makes it worse. You doubt he expected that out of all the people to disappoint him, it would be you. Yet here you are. 
You and Jimin return to the table with the plated desserts. You hand one to Jungkook but he doesn’t acknowledge you. He doesn’t meet your eyes either when it’s all you try to do. He peacefully eats his apple pie while you feign interest at your parents talking about their recent weekend at a spa. 
When everyone’s done, he helps Jimin clean up. It’s how you know that Jungkook’s considered part of the family, as your parents don’t stop him from doing so, unlike when it comes to other guests or your friends. 
You watch helplessly as he washes the dishes, turning down your offer to help. You take the rest of the plates and walk towards him instead, standing close so you could place them in the sink. He just moves his arms to give you space then returns to his task, not sparing you a glance. 
You stay with your parents in the dining area to talk about their trip. They leave you with important documents and give you instructions should anything bad happen to them while they’re away, as they always do whenever they go on a trip. Everything is your responsibility as the eldest, they remind you. 
They finally go to their room to continue packing and you sit on the corner of the couch where Jimin and Jungkook have just finished watching some video of a guy reacting to other videos. You constantly glance at your boyfriend but he seems to be intent on not giving you attention because he’s not like this - he always wants to be close to you, needing his hand to be touching your arm or your thigh or even your hair, and his pretty eyes locked on you. But not tonight.
You recall how months ago, you avoided him because of what you started to feel. And perhaps this is how he felt then - helpless, unsure, and desperate for you to be next to him again. 
You find the tiniest bit of courage and call out his name, hoping he’d at least turn to you this time. 
“Kook, I’m—”
“Hey, we should probably play now so we finish early,” Jungkook nudges Jimin’s knee. “It’s been a long day; I don’t really want to stay up late.”
Your brother looks at you in apology as he responds to the man on his left in agreement. They both head up, leaving you rooted in your seat, wishing that Jungkook would turn around to tell you that he doesn’t mean creating this distance, but he doesn’t. 
And you wouldn’t blame him. You’d stay away from you, too.
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You end up watching Aliens on your own, crouched on your corner of the couch with the large blanket over you. You give up after an hour, once the movie starts getting intense and scary though. There’s no Jungkook to hold you during the jumpscares, or to tease you about your screaming, or to assure you that he’ll protect you from all types of monsters. 
There’s no Jungkook next to you but you want him there, and it’s another half hour later when you decide that you’re not going to bed without speaking to him. 
You hate sleeping sad and upset. You don’t like ending the day not being on good terms with him. There are so many things you want to tell him but more than anything, you just want to hold him close. He always said he liked that, because even during the times when there’s so much to say or feel, falling into each other’s arms is the easiest thing to do. It says enough. It shows enough. And you’ve both survived misunderstandings and stressful moments by holding each other, and then holding each other closer.
Walking up the stairs and towards Jimin’s room, the nerves kick in. Jungkook has been ignoring you the whole evening and you’re unsure if he’s willing to hear you out. 
But you try, as you knock on the door, your heart beating fast when it slowly opens. Your brother’s downcast eyes meet you and you don’t need to say anything else. 
He opens the door wider then turns to the man lying on a mattress on the floor.
“Kook, my sister’s looking for you.”
You glance at him, dressed in that black tank top that always made you breathless, but once again, he avoids your gaze. But he does stand up after a nudge on the foot from your brother and walks over to you.
“Can we, uh…” you gesture towards the room just across the hallway.
He doesn’t say anything but he doesn’t shut you out, which is a good thing. You take it as your cue to start walking and you hear his footsteps right behind you. 
You let him in then close the door behind him. There’s so much you want to say, like you’re sorry and that you were stupid, that you didn’t mean to deny him but that you didn’t know how to tell your parents, or what you were even nervous about. You want to say that you just want to spend tonight wrapped up in his arms and apologizing in all the ways that you can.
But instead of uttering the words, your throat dries up. Seeing him standing there with that upset and disinterested look on his face breaks you a little. So you reach out, your hands pressing gently on his chest to try to feel him, to be close to him, hopefully to hold him and make your mistake go away. 
“Kook, I…” you tremble, trying so hard to find the words.
Jungkook looks back at you, your face nervous and unsure, unlike his that’s probably still painted with disappointment. 
He still doesn’t know what to make of your denial. He’s been trying to see things from your point of view all evening, but doing so only in his head because verbalizing them, especially to his best friend, makes it sting a bit more. Maybe Jimin can explain on your behalf but that would just confirm to Jungkook one of two things - that you don’t really intend on telling your parents about both of you for whatever reason he can’t comprehend, or you don’t think he measures up to their expectations and for that, you might just think he’s not good enough for you. 
He doesn’t think he’s ready for that, so he shuts Jimin down when he asks. They watched videos earlier to have something to laugh about but he was faking it. He suggested playing a game just so he wouldn’t respond to you calling him earlier but all they’ve done since going to the room is lie in silence. 
Jungkook doesn’t want to talk about it with his best friend. And he certainly doesn’t want to talk about it with you. He doesn’t want an explanation right now. It’s not what he wants to hear. 
And it seems as if it’s something you’re even struggling to give him, as you stand there quivering, your hands slowly trying to pull him closer to you. 
It’s what you usually do when you can’t find the words to express something - when you’re stressed and frustrated, when you want to patch things up after a small misunderstanding, when you want his comfort. And he always loved it when you did. He always willingly gave you that hug and that kiss and those whispers of “it’s okay” and “we’re okay” and “I’m just here.” 
But not tonight, not when there’s this unnamed thing that’s eating him inside, and not even you can fix it. 
“I don’t… I don’t really wanna do this right now,” he mutters, taking your hands to slowly slide them off him. 
The look of hurt in your eyes is one that’ll probably haunt him for a while, but he’ll learn to deal with that. It’s better than talking with you about something that you don’t even know how to express. 
This isn’t like him. It’s not like him to be upset at you like this, to not want to comfort you, to not want to be around you. This messes him up, too, and all he can do is step away and walk out.
He doesn’t really wanna be here, he thinks to himself as he enters the room just across, to the surprise of Jimin who half expected both of you to have made up. Jungkook would go home if he only brought his keys and it wasn’t too late to ask his parents to open the door for him.
But his best friend’s floor mattress will do for now. And so Jungkook puts on his earpods and plays whatever music is loud enough to shut out the thought of you until he falls asleep. 
In the other room, you lay in your bed in complete silence. You don’t want to cry, only because he’s not there to wipe your tears away. And you don’t ever want to know what that’s like, so you don’t. You keep the tears at bay and force yourself to drift away. 
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You jerk awake the next morning to your mother knocking on your door. You promised to do errands with her today, so you get off the bed and yell out that you’ll just fix up.
“No rush, dear. I’m still having breakfast with your father. You can join us when you’re ready.”
You head down and eat the pastries that they brought from the cafe. You don’t have much appetite and these will suffice, but your mind goes to Jungkook and how he was craving kimchi fried rice and spam yesterday. 
So that’s what you make for him and Jimin. You even prepare iced coffee the way they like it. You’re about to set the dish aside for them to heat up when you hear rushed footsteps down the stairs and you know they’ve woken up.
“Wahhh, it smells so good,” Jimin exclaims as he walks over to the counter while his best friend sits on the table. “Did you make something, dad?”
“Oh, your sister cooked for you and Jungkook,” your father hums. “It’s making me hungry now.”
“There’s still some in here if you want,” you call out, with him responding that he’ll get some later.
You serve the dish in two bowls. You hand one to Jimin and then place the other in front of Jungkook without sparing him a glance. 
“Iced coffee is in the refrigerator,” you tell them. 
You hear Jimin’s little squeal before he gets them. “Where you off to?” He asks.
“I’m running errands with mom.”
“Make sure you two make it in time for dinner, okay?” Your father says.
“Of course. I can’t miss your steak, dad,” you give him a small smile. 
“Good. I prepared meat good enough for five Actually, six. I count Jungkook as two people,” he laughs. 
The thought of this comfort and familiarity hurts you because you’re the one who made Jungkook think otherwise. You see him smile at your father’s remark but you turn away when he looks your way. You know he’s still upset and you don’t want to force it if he’s not yet ready to speak with you. You also haven’t gotten over the way he pulled away from you last night, and so looking at him today is a little difficult.
“You’re still joining us at the party, right?” Jimin asks. 
Their friend, Hari, whom you know briefly dated Jungkook in high school, is celebrating her birthday tonight. Their group always looked to you as the cool sister so you’re always invited to whatever they’ve got going, and while the three of you talked about attending later, after what you did, you doubt Jungkook would want you to spoil his evening. You’re also not exactly in the partying mood for obvious reasons.
“I’ll pass, Chim,” you respond. “You guys should have a best friend night.”
You go back to your room to fix up before joining your mother to head out. 
Back in the dining room, Jimin nudges Jungkook’s knee.
“She’s still playing favorites,” he playfully rolls his eyes as he gestures to the generous amount of spam in his best friend’s bowl compared to his decent serving. 
Jungkook just hums, guilt forming that he didn’t even thank you for this because he really has been craving it. Before any of them could say anything more, your father speaks up.
“Your sister okay, son?”
“Uh, yeah? Why wouldn’t she be?” Jimin nervously answers.
“She just doesn’t seem like herself, that’s all,” your old man replies.
“Maybe it’s work. It’s been tough lately,” your brother reasons. 
“But she’s more tired and frustrated when it comes to work but that’s not what she is. Maybe it’s a guy.”
At this, Jungkook chokes on his food, and he’s glad your father doesn’t react.
“What makes you think so?” Jimin asks, his eyes flitting to his best friend.
“Hmm, it just seems different,” your father insists. “Or maybe it’s just wishful thinking on my end. She hasn’t introduced anyone since Namjoon. And I wish she would, just so we know she’s moved on, you know? And that the breakup isn’t still hurting her.”
“She has, and it doesn’t affect her anymore,” Jimin confirms, certain of at least that bit.
“Then why hasn’t she introduced anyone yet?”
“Maybe it’s because you really liked Namjoon, and he seems to be your standard so ___ is just probably just taking her time.”
“Well it’s because he’s smart and stable and very self-assured and—”
“Also very much married. And a soon-to-be father,” Jimin interjects, already being protective of you. 
He wonders now if this is how your parents talk about him to you, and that you’ve always just protected him from all of it.
“Oh,” your father sighs. “It could’ve been her.”
“But it isn’t and that’s totally fine,” Jimin exclaims. “She’s young and she’s got time. And who knows, maybe that’s not the life she wants, or at least not yet? If you could accept my version of happiness, you should be able to accept hers, too. And what does ‘stable’ even mean?”
“Someone with ambition, with a direction,” your old man explains. “Someone who’s secure and financially capable of sustaining this good life that your mom and I gave you both.”
“Those are all the things she is, too, you know?” Jimin frowns. “And also, I love you, dad, but you’re old. By that I mean your thinking is old. It’s outdated. You think stability is about prestige and money and I get that but… that’s not everything. There are other things that matter to her and if you lessened the pressure a bit, you’d see that. She’s your daughter, don’t you want her to be happy? To be loved?”
“Of course I do,” your father sighs. 
“Well then don’t let your version of what a good partner is dictate her life,” Jimin advises. “She’s a grown up, she knows what she wants and how to get it. But she’s also your daughter who doesn’t want to worry or disappoint you. What if she’s found someone who makes her happy and treats her right but she’s nervous of what you’d think because of all these expectations you have of her?”
Jimin’s eyes flit to his best friend again who’s quietly munching on his food but is clearly taking in this exchange. While Jimin still thinks you were wrong to deny your relationship, he at least hopes that Jungkook could understand what was going through your mind and it was all this. 
“Well if she has then I’d want to meet him,” your father insists. 
“And maybe you will, once she stops feeling the pressure of what she’s supposed to be for you and who she’s supposed to date,” Jimin explains. 
“I guess you’re right.”
“Of course I’m right, dad,” Jimin groans. “I lived with her for months and she just… she worries about a lot of things. It would be nice if she doesn’t worry about this. So please, stop with all the projections and underhanded remarks, okay? She sees right through you. Just let her live her life.”
A smile forms on your father’s face. It was never his intention to put all that pressure on you but he supposes you just accepted that it comes with the territory. But he realizes it shouldn’t be. His son’s right - he’s old. He and your mother worked hard so that you and your brother could have a life where you didn’t have to worry about anything, but he supposes the intention got muddled along the way. At least you and Jimin have each other.
“I know you and your sister don’t like to admit it but it’s really touching to see how similar you both are,” your father says.
“Excuse me, I’m cooler and funnier and definitely more talented,” Jimin pouts. 
“Maybe,” your old man laughs. “But she’s sat on that same chair, lecturing me and your mom about letting you live your life and now you’re doing the same. She’s your biggest advocate and your biggest protector. It’s just nice to see how you’re the same for her.”
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Running errands with your mother has always been your responsibility, but it’s once you’ve hit your late-twenties mark that you’ve come to appreciate it. 
You learn a lot about the practical stuff like insurance and emergency funds and inheritance when you accompany her to the bank. You’re also reminded that sometimes you have to spend more to make things last when she drops off her clothes at the laundry service and picks up the bag and shoes she had professionally cleaned. You also remember the important things like buying flowers and leaving them on your grandparents’ graves. 
You’ve just left the shopping center after she bought your father an anniversary gift, and her excitement over the satchel and perfume she got him has you smiling. You wonder how differently she feels for him 30 years later, and if this life they have together is everything she imagined it to be.
“Was it hard at the beginning? Being married to dad?” You ask. 
“Of course, dear,” she answers. “Because it’s how marriages typically go. Your father and I were together for two years before we got married and it was a big change. You just… learn to consider another person, and you get used to someone always being around you.”
“It’s a good thing you can stand each other then,” you chuckle. 
“That’s true,” she laughs back. “You’d be surprised to know how many married couples can’t. But we just always managed. And we had to be on each other’s side, you know? It’s the reason why we’ve lasted as long as we have.”
She looks quite emotional as she says the words and it’s probably because of what they’ll be celebrating soon but she turns to you with a smile.
“Your father’s parents wanted me to become a housewife, a stay-at-home mom who just ran the household,” she continues. “But I wanted to work so I could help my parents, and your father stood by my decision. He saw how working gave him financial freedom and he wanted that for me, too. And we just… worked hard. We fought a lot at the start because we were building our careers and raising a family but we knew it would all be worth it, as long as we stood by each other.”
“Then I suppose that’s what’s important in a partner, isn’t it?” You say. “Being dependable, being supportive, not… not what kind of career they have.”
“Well, a stable career helps,” she points out. “I mean, it’s how your father and I got to afford sending you and your brother to good schools. It’s how we could afford trips as a family and how your father and I can be secure at this age without needing much help from our children.”
“But that’s also because you worked hard, plain and simple. And you and dad had each other and overcame whatever challenges you faced together. You can’t say the same for all married couples,” you push. 
“That’s true. I mean, it wasn’t like this during our parents’ time. I guess people had less options then. The world’s changed so much, hasn’t it?”
“It has,” you hum. “Not everyone cares much about their partner’s upward mobility and stuff like that. They want to savor the good life their parents gave them. And because they work hard, too, they just want someone to enjoy it with them. You know, like me.”
There’s a beat of silence as your mother processes your words. 
“Is that why it didn’t work out with Namjoon?” She asks, reminding you that you’d only given them a general reason as to why things ended.
“We spent too much time planning for our future that we kinda lost our way,” you explain. “I guess that’s when I realized that I wanted someone to enjoy the moments with, regardless of what they do for a living. And we’ll never know what life will throw our way and I need someone who’ll stand by me, the way I’ll stand by them. You know, cheesy things like that.”
You smile to yourself as you think about Jungkook and his shameless affection that he shows in so many ways. You enjoy the cheesiness but you’ll deny it first before admitting it. But then again, he probably knows already. He pays attention to you after all. 
“Well, I suppose that’s why we wanted to give you and your brother a good and secure life, so that you can enjoy it,” your mother hums.
“Exactly. You raised us well, mom. We’re not gonna throw our lives away, however we choose to live it, and with whom,” you assure her. 
She gives you a warm smile. She takes your hand at the stoplight and caresses it. Perhaps it’s the assurance you need, too.
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You return home to your father preparing the meat for tonight’s dinner. There’s a platter of steak, vegetables, and sausages that he’s seasoning to grill, and you can imagine how happy this is gonna make Jungkook. He always liked it when your dad prepared dishes like this paired with your mom’s spicy chicken soup, and you wish you could enjoy it together. 
But you’re giving him space to feel what he feels and you’re doing the same, even if all you want to do is apologize. You haven’t had an issue quite like this, so things are a little unfamiliar to you. You tried to talk to him last night but he wasn’t ready, and you’re unsure when he will be. 
You head towards the counter and cut up the vegetables for the soup before slicing the fruits. You’re focused on your task, knowing how sharp the knives are, but it’s at the same time that your brother and Jungkook arrive. Seeing your boyfriend look as good as he does in that denim jacket-over tank top fit is so sinful; it’s a crime you’re not talking that it distracts you, and it’s what causes you to slice through your finger and yelp in pain.
“Did you hurt yourself, dear?” Your mom asks as she stirs the pot. 
“Yeah,” you say, placing your hand under running water.
You’re about to ask Jimin to get the First Aid kit from the drawer but Jungkook gets to it first, knowing where it is. 
He knows that your brother, who’s terrified of blood, won’t help you, and despite your situation, Jungkook can’t stand not helping. So he lathers an antiseptic once the bleeding has stopped, then he wraps a band-aid around it. Just like him, you focus your gaze on your finger. Or maybe you’re stuck on the way he tends to you. Or the fact that this is the most physical touch you’ve done this past day when you normally can’t take your hands off each other. 
He sighs to himself. If he wasn’t so hung up on his hurt feelings, he’d be able to tend to you better. This might not even have happened if he’d just spoken to you last night. 
But he shakes the thought away. He’s still upset. But he’ll always want to take care of you; that’s the one thing that won’t ever change.
“Thank you,” you mumble, still not meeting his eyes.
“I’ll do this,” he says, waiting for you to step aside before he takes your place. 
“Jungkook dear, do you mind helping me with the glazed potatoes after you finish that?” She asks.
“Sure thing, auntie,” he replies. 
You watch him work around the kitchen the way he’s done so many times before, and your heart stings at the sight because you want to be doing this with him, with your parents, in your family kitchen. But it’s not like you could talk to him right now, not when you don’t know how to say what you want to say. So you head outside to where your dad is grilling the meat and help him instead. 
It’s not long after when dinner is ready, and you’re seated across Jungkook again. It’s a little tense when you look at him when he looks away, but Jimin thankfully finds a way to keep the conversation light and focused on him.
Your parents insist that both men don’t need to help clean up, and Jimin asks you if you’re really not going.
“Yeah I’ll just… stay home, make sure mom and dad are packed well and just get everything in order for tomorrow,” you say, half lying. 
“Gee, you make me look like a useless child,” Jimin pouts.
“You’re alright,” you hum. “You can drive them to the airport tomorrow.”
“But mom asked Jungkook to do that.”
“Well then you could just… make them a card or something,” you shrug. 
Your brother sticks his tongue at you and you do the same. 
“Fine, we’ll head out,” he announces.
“You guys have fun,” you say softly, glancing at Jungkook before walking towards the sink to do your duty. 
You turn to your brother. “Call me if you need me to pick you up. No driving drunk, okay?”
He salutes you in response then heads out after Jungkook.
It’s uneventful after that. You help your parents with last minute packing then have a long shower. You lie on your bed and mindlessly watch some movie on your laptop hoping that you’ll fall asleep soon, and that when you wake up, you’ll find the strength to go to Jungkook and tell him that you’re sorry and that you don’t want to go another day without him. 
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“Hey, Jungkook. Dance with me.”
Jungkook looks up to find Hari and gives the same answer he’s given the last two times.
“Sorry, I’m injured,” he says. 
She raises her eyebrow as if she doesn’t believe him and he can’t blame her; he doesn’t exactly know how to act like it.
“Oh, Jimin. There you are,” she chirps as the said man approaches the table. “Dance with me.”
“Sorry, I'm injured.”
“Great. It’s my birthday and I spot two hot guys in this party without girls around them and they’re fake injured,” she scowls. “What’s up with you two?”
“I’m not in the mood,” Jungkook shrugs.
“I’m babysitting,” Jimin says, gesturing at his friend. “But Mingyu and Eunwoo are right there. Go tell them to dance with you.”
“Fine. I’ll get in line then,” she rolls her eyes then walks away.
“How come no one believes me when I say I’m injured?” Jungkook asks as he munches on the fried chicken wings his best friend got.
“Because you’re a terrible actor. People believe me because I’m believable,” Jimin hums.
“They believe you because you posted all over social media that you hurt your ankle,” Jungkook corrects. 
“Yeah but that was like, half a year ago.”
“Why are you even pretending you’re injured? You don’t have to stay with me, you know? Go to the dance floor and have fun. That’s your thing.”
“Well, maybe I’m also not in the mood because my best friend’s sulking,” Jimin frowns. 
“Gee, I wonder why.”
“You know my sister’s sorry, right?”
“She’s ashamed, that’s what she is. And I’m just supposed to live with that.”
Jimin sighs as he watches his best friend mindlessly stare out onto the dance floor. Jungkook’s probably trying to rid himself of the image of both of you dancing and kissing and having fun if you were here. He could be making sense of what he feels, or his mind could also just be completely blank right now.
But what Jimin knows is that another glass of whiskey is something that Jungkook shouldn’t be having, so he stops his best friend from ordering another one.
“You might get drunk and then you’ll call or go see her and then you’ll say things you’ll regret and then you’ll hurt her and you’ll get even more hurt and you’ll have a harder time fixing things and then it just won’t stop and you’ll feel stupid because you’re not talking over something you could easily fix,” Jimin heaves. 
It’s a lot to process but Jungkook knows that Jimin’s right. He’ll just get too emotional and won’t be able to control himself and despite what he feels, hurting you is the last thing he wants.
So he orders water instead, finishes it, then heads for the door.
“I don’t wanna be here anymore,” he says. “I need to get some air.”
They end up at a park, the one that you used to hang at with your friends in high school. Jungkook knows because he always accompanied Jimin there when you’d tell him where to meet you. It’s peaceful at this time of night and much more beautiful, too. It’s no surprise he keeps thinking that you’re right next to him, with your head on his chest and laughing at his jokes. 
“Why is this affecting me so much?” He wonders out loud. “Why am I so hurt and so stubborn?”
“Because she said something she shouldn’t have. But also because you put her on a pedestal,” Jimin answers. “She made a mistake, and you’re free to fault her for it. I mean, anytime someone we care about hurts us, it sucks like hell. But you also have to think that maybe it’s affecting you as much as it does because she’s always been faultless in your eyes and she isn’t.”
The reality is a slap on the face, but one that Jungkook thinks he needs to have. You were everything he ever wanted and these past three months have been a bliss. But now that reality hits and you have to face the pressure that’s part of your life, your humanness is showing. And that’s what he’s always liked about you, isn’t it? The imperfections and the flaws? Now that those are affecting him, it’s affecting him hard, and he’s having a hard time getting over it.
“Maybe once you accept that she’s human and not just the dream you’ve had since forever, then you’ll realize that things like that happen but she never means to hurt you,” Jimin adds. “You can’t think that she does. You learn to work it out by facing it, Kook. You have to talk about it. You have to tell her it hurts and you have to listen to what she says, and then you forgive. That’s kind of how grownup relationships go.”
“Guess I’ve never had one before, huh?”
“Maybe they just didn’t mean enough to hurt you.”
“This means everything, then,” Jungkook sighs, as things get clearer in his mind. “Because I think what hurts more now is not being next to her.”
“Great! Then can both of you patch things up now?” Jimin beams, feeling hopeful. “I hate seeing both of you sad and so stupid. Plus, my parents are leaving tomorrow and you won’t have a buffer anymore. So please just talk.”
Jungkook admits feeling touched. He knows at the end of the day, Jimin cares about him and you more than anyone, and he probably misses being around both of you at the same time. Jungkook does, too, but he misses you the most and it’s only been a day.
“Tomorrow,” he says. “I don’t know what to tell her and it’s late. She might be asleep and—”
“Now you’re just making excuses,” Jimin crosses his arms.
“Well, what if I expect her to be the one to talk to me?”
“She tried but you didn’t want to, remember?”
“That was last night. The wound was still fresh,” Jungkook pouts. 
“Oh god. I feel like I’m dealing with children,” Jimin groans.
“Imagine how we felt taking care of you,” Jungkook answers back.
“At least I was just one person,” Jimin rolls his eyes. 
“Your dramatics were equivalent to two people though.”
Both men bicker as they walk back to the car. It started to drizzle so they decided to go back to their respective homes. Jungkook could stay over at your place and maybe talk to you if he really wants to but he’s seriously just chickening out over it. 
He’s never had to make up with you because none of your previous arguments ever led to you not talking to each other, or him pushing you away. He’s never had to spend a day ignoring you. And now, there’s so much to say and so much to feel but he doesn’t know how to approach it. He’ll need tonight to sort himself out and then he’ll speak to you, maybe after he drives your parents to the airport. Or maybe on the way back. 
He drops Jimin off; 30 seconds later, he’s home, too. You’re so close but so far away just like you used to be. But at least this time he knows that when the next day comes, he’ll have a chance to just pull you close and tell you he doesn’t want to be like this ever again.
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There’s an incessant knocking on your door, and as you’re about to yell out that you’re asleep, you realize it might be Jungkook. You sit up on your bed and when the door opens and you see your brother instead, your face falls.
“It’s just me, unfortunately,” he says. “Kook’s back at his place.”
“Oh,” you sigh. “Why are you home so early? It’s like, 11.”
“Because after the third girl, his fake injury excuse wore off and people just didn’t believe him. We looked like losers sitting on the table eating chicken,” Jimin chuckles. “So we left after an hour then went to a park and I knocked some sense into him and now he’s not so upset anymore. And I’m here to knock some sense into you, too.”
“I already know I made a mistake, Chim. I’m… I’m so fucking stupid. I just… don’t want him to think that I’m ashamed of him or that I don’t think he’s enough or any of that. I mean I’m—”
“Crazy about him, right?”
“I kinda am,” you smile softly.
“Good, because so is he and he’s hoping you’d go talk to him even if he says he’ll talk to you tomorrow. Don’t waste time anymore and—”
You’re bolting off your bed and putting on your hoodie before your brother could finish his sentence. 
“If mom and dad look for me, tell them I—”
“Got attacked by a clown in the sewer.”
You look at him incredulously then realize you’re wearing yellow then you frown. 
“Just make up some excuse. I’ll… hopefully be back in the morning,” you say.
“Alright. It’s drizzling though so—”
And just like that, you’re gone.
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It takes all but 10 seconds for the rain to pour, and your hoodie and sweatpants are no match for it. You groan at your brother for underselling the weather but then again, you also should be thanking him for telling you what you needed to hear - that Jungkook’s not so upset anymore and that he’s hoping you’d speak to him. 
Much as you think you would’ve taken any chance today to patch things up, you also would’ve frozen in front of him. You suppose you needed to know he was ready for you, and if he wouldn’t tell you, then of course, Jimin would. You just really wish he had the foresight to know it would rain this hard but you’re probably asking for too much. 
But Jungkook’s place is just a few blocks from yours so you power through. When you get there, you realize that you forgot your phone, so you make the stupid decision of climbing over the short fence and then hitting your cut finger in the process. 
You have no time to feel pain though, as the next order of business is getting Jungkook’s attention. But before you can execute your plan of throwing rocks on his window, the front door opens, and you telepathically thank your brother who probably called your boyfriend to alert him that you’ll be arriving at his place wet from the rain.
“___, what are you doing here?” Jungkook asks with worry painted on his face. 
“I just… I needed to come and see you,” you manage to answer.
His face softens and you feel the hope bloom in your chest. He pulls you inside by the wrist and instructs you to quietly go up the stairs. You’re at least not drenched but you still got wet, so he leads you to the bathroom to wash up. He tells you to wait as he gets you something to change in, and he returns after half a minute with a towel and a large shirt.
“Cream and band-aid, for your wound,” he says, placing them on the counter. “My room’s the second door to the right, in case you forgot.”
You take him in, in his black tank top and shorts, his tongue playing with his lip ring the way he always does when he’s nervous. You manage to nod before he heads out, and you take a quick shower and then pull his oversized shirt over you. 
You quietly walk to his room, knocking on the door first before opening it slowly. It’s a bit dim but seeing him is all you need. After placing your clothes on the nearby chair, you look at him again. 
He looks tired and worried. He also looks like he has so much to say but he doesn’t know where to start. There’s a hint of sadness in his eyes but there’s longing, too, and you suppose he’s mirroring how you look. You feel a lot. You also want to say a lot, but you don’t know where or how to start. 
So you do the one thing you know often works. You approach him then wrap your arms around his torso. You fall into his embrace as quickly as he falls into yours, as he seems to have the same idea. You hold him tighter and pull him closer. You flush your cheeks on his chest while he buries his face on your neck. You grip his top and he does the same with yours. Your heart beats fast in longing and you feel his own do the same, too. 
There’s so much to feel and say but this is all you can do. And right now, it’s quite enough. 
You loosen your grip, but only so you could nuzzle his neck while your arms wrap around them. He feels so warm and he smells so delicate and he’s all you need.
“You knew I was coming?” You ask, turning to him
“Jimin said you were on your way without an umbrella and your phone,” Jungkook chuckles. But his face softens as he wipes the lone tear that falls down your cheek. “You’re lucky it wasn’t a typhoon or anything.”
“I had to get to you,” you mumble. 
“He also told me he wasn’t subtle in telling you to come here.”
“Well, he did say you wanted me to talk to you. And I wanted to. I just wasn’t sure if you were ready to hear me out and I was… giving you space.”
“Yeah well, I don’t know what to do with that space without you there,” he sighs, his eyes shy and absolutely adorable.
“Neither do I,” you smile. “So, uh. Will you invite me to your bed, maybe fill that space and more?”
“Of course,” he laughs, taking your hand and leading you there. 
You get under the covers and once he lies next to you, you scoot closer, hugging him again until you’re laying on top of him. But he doesn’t complain. He just hugs you back tightly, pulling you closer until he’s able to bask in your scent and the warm feel of you.
But despite the relief, you know you actually have to do the talking. You pull away and lay on your side. You take in his beauty and his softness and the way they make you feel like all is right again in the world. Your fingers trace his face, from his nose to his cheek to his lips, and he does the boyfriend thing of kissing your hand - including your cut finger - before wrapping it around his waist. He looks like he’s anticipating your words, too, so you try and hope they’re enough.
“Kook, I’m so sorry,” you start. “I… I have no excuse. I was being selfish and cowardly because I didn’t know how to tell my parents. I didn’t want to deal with what they’ll say about your job, knowing how they are and what they value and I just…”
“That’s for me to deal with though,” he says. “Because I chose this. And I’ve always known how they are but I still chose you.”
“It’s for us to deal with, and I did it so terribly,” you shake your head. “I don’t want you to think that I’m ashamed of you and what you do. That freedom, the ability to create… they’re things they don’t really understand. And I thought I knew how to make them. I just ended up denying us and that was so wrong. I’m so sorry.”
“I… I get it,” he responds, caressing your cheek now. “They worked so hard to give you this life and of course they want to make sure you’re taken care of. And for them, they only know of one way that could happen. I’d be naive to think they’ll just accept that the man who’s crazy about their daughter isn’t some corporate dude with secure employment and upward mobility in his career.”
He doesn’t miss your shy smile and the way you nibble your lip and that just triggers the butterflies in his belly. 
“But that’s for me to show them that I can take care of you, and not because you can’t do it yourself but because I want to,” he adds. “I… I wanna be that person who makes things better and easier for you and who makes you happy.”
And who makes you feel loved, he doesn’t say. That’s a conversation for another day, he thinks.
“You do,” you assure him. “And I feel it everyday. You’re good at that, and I don’t tell you enough.”
“I know now,” he smiles, leaning closer to kiss you softly. 
You return it but pull away. “Do you forgive me?”
“Of course I do,” he says, falling into the kiss that he gives again.
“Okay. I don’t wanna hurt you like that ever again.”
Your pouty face tugs his heart and he wants to tell you that none of that matters now because you’re back in each other’s arms, and that’ll always be enough for him. 
He just hums as he goes for another kiss that’s deeper this time. And when you let him push you to lay on your back as you moan against his lips, his heart soars even more. He’s missed you, and it’s definitely going to be a long night.
He hovers over you now, and he shivers when your fingers graze his neck and then his chest. You open your legs to meet his hips, and the feel of your clothed cunt against him has his brain short-circuiting. He gets in the rhythm of grinding against you while he kisses your lips then your jaw then your neck, his hand now sneaking under your shirt to fondle your breast.
It’s when he sucks on that sensitive part near your ear that you yelp in pleasure, and he immediately covers your mouth with his hand while he giggles.
“Gotta keep it down babe,” he whispers. “My parents are in the other room.”
But he doesn’t stop his kissing and you don’t really want him to.
“It’s not like you’re making it any easier,” you moan as he pinches your pert nipple.
“I’m not and I won’t, but you gotta try,” he smirks before his lips trail downward.
You’re unable to say anything once his tongue swirls around your buds. His hands wrap around your breasts that he praises, that he kisses and licks before slowly letting them go to hold onto your waist this time. He presses open-mouth kisses down your torso, his lips in tandem with your underwear that’s teasingly being removed off of you. 
You hear him let out a breathy moan as he spreads your legs wider. 
And while you know that this tender-hearted man has a cheeky streak in him, you didn’t expect for him to have his finger against his lips to shush you, knowing what he’s about to do. His smug face turns you on even more, and your breath is caught in your throat once you feel his tongue flat against your flesh, warming it up before the tip of his wet muscle swirls around your nub.
But you go along with his request, biting back your moan, even as your pussy chases his mouth for more. 
And it’s what he gives, as he dives in and sucks and bites your clit while his two fingers explore your hole. The cold of his lip ring is a contrast to how hot you feel, and it’s a sensation you can never get enough of. You whimper in silence but you manage to look at him, his eyes closed as he buries his face in your cunt. 
“Look at me,” you whisper and he follows, his gaze meeting yours. “Fuu-uuck, Kook. You feel so good,” your voice quivers.
His mouth’s full but yours is hanging open. You cover yours with your free hand while the other pulls on his long locks. He’s enjoying this so much, you can tell with the way he squeezes your thighs and moans against your skin. He follows a pace that has your body shaking, straining in intense pleasure until it gives in. You let out a low scream as your orgasm hits, and he’s right there, riding out your high with you.
He cleans you up with his tongue and then makes a show of licking your essence off his fingers before kissing you again.
“You did good,” he teases, as he caresses your cheek.
You’re about to say that so did he when bucks his hip against yours, and the feel of his hard cock against your still wet cunt ignites another fire in you. He repeats it, and it’s what has you moaning again.
“Fuck baby, I told you to keep it down,” he says, continuing his movements.
You know you can’t help it at this point, not when he’s back to licking your neck and kneading your breast.
“Whatever. Not like this isn’t new to your parents or anything,” you say. 
It’s a guess but you doubt you’re wrong.
“What? Fucking a girl in my room?” 
“Yeah?”
“But you’re the first girl I ever brought in here,” he cocks an eyebrow. 
“That’s uh, that’s kinda sweet,” you reply, your breath steadying now. 
“Yeah and well, who gets to say they fucked their childhod crush in their childhood bedroom?” He smirks again. “I can.”
He’s back to kissing you and much as you enjoy this, the itch to feel him in your mouth overtakes you, and you take the chance when he trails down your neck.
“So, can this childhood crush suck your dick?” 
“Yes, she can,” he chuckles.
He removes himself from you and leans against his bed frame. You get on your knees and pull off his boxers, salivating at the sight before you. You get on top of him, your damp lips gliding against his hard cock and his mouth drops open, an invitation for you to do what you wish.
With your movements on his hips, you focus on his neck, licking up the smooth flesh and the protruding vein that has him biting back his moan. Then you kiss him, desperately and passionately, as you slowly remove his tank top and rest your hands on his chest.
It’s your turn to trail kisses down his torso now and you give every inch of him ample attention. But when you make it further down, there’s one part of him that deserves so much more. You tease him only a little, stroking his length and kitten-licking his slit, before swallowing him whole and swirling your tongue around and all over his cock. He’s hard and thick and everything you want inside of you.
You hold back a gag while he holds back his whimpers. You stroke him relentlessly so you could watch his mouth hang open and his strained body almost folding in pleasure as his thighs tighten in your hold. 
“You like that, baby?” You hum.
“Fuck, baby, you feel so good around me. Fuck,” he keens, his voice quivering now. 
You let his sounds guide you on how hard and how deep to go, but he’s the one who stops you, as he leans close and captures your lips in a searing kiss. He pulls you back on top of him to slide down his cock and the stretch makes you moan in his mouth. 
He’s propped up on his arms for support while you move up and down, loving how he drags inside you in an angle that has your mind going hazy. You wrap your arms around his neck while he pushes upward to meet you, and somehow doing this while trying to be quiet is making the pleasure more intense.
It gets too much for Jungkook and he wants more. He wants to hit your deepest spots. He wants to be as close to you as he possibly can. He wants to swallow your moans and touch every part of your body and pleasure you in every way that he’s able. 
So he pulls you off and lays you on your side, sliding back in from behind, with your one leg raised. The angle has you keening, even more when his one hand finds your breast and the other does its work on your clit. He pushes gently then roughly, no longer caring about the odd sounds the bed is making against his wall. He wouldn’t mind making up a reason to his parents if they ask him about it. Right now, all he wants is to reach his peak with you. 
Your body is shaking in pleasure and overstimulation but you urge him, wanting to feel his seed inside you as well.
You lick his mouth. “Baby please, I want to feel your cum inside me,” you beg. “I want you so bad, fuck fuck.”
He loves it when you plead to him like this. He loves hearing what he does to you. He revels in the way your body molds into his, the way it aches to be close and to be one with him. His movements continue, and with his unrhythmic pounding against your pussy, he comes. You come right after, caused by his intense fiddling of your clit, and you feel like floating, your body in the clouds of pure pleasure.
But like always, he’s there with you, making sure you safely fall into a bed of hugs and kisses and warmth. He stays inside you as he softens, but his arms wrap around you, his face in your neck as he mumbles words of praise. 
“Fifteen-year-old me would never believe this,” he heaves as he turns you over to face him.
You giggle in response. 
“You’re crazy, you know that?”
“I do. It’s how I am with you. In the best way, of course,” he smiles his boyish smile, an interesting mix of innocent and cheeky.
“It’s the same with me,” you whisper, kissing his nose. “And 18-year-old me would never believe this.”
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You wake up the next morning to the alarm that you set on Jungkook’s phone. Your parents are leaving early in the afternoon and they wanted to prepare breakfast for all of you, and it’s a meal with them that you’re excited and a little nervous to have. 
You kiss the chest that your face is flushed against, and this elicits a groan from the man next to you. 
“Good morning, babe,” you greet, shifting up to kiss his nose this time. 
“G’morning,” he grunts.
“So, uh, we’re supposed to meet my parents for breakfast. And uh, I’m going to tell them about us.”
It’s what prompts him to finally open his eyes, and the softness in them makes your heart burst. 
“Okay,” he smiles. “I hope it won’t ruin their trip or anything.”
“It won’t,” you assure him. “I… I tried to get through to my mom yesterday. You know, just telling her the things I value and stuff.”
“Hmm. Jimin did the same with your dad. I guess I won’t be such a disappointment now, huh?”
“Shush, you’re not even that,” you pout. “I think they’ll understand.”
He mirrors your smile and there’s a giddy feeling at finally - hopefully - seeing your parents be happy for you. So you get off the bed and sneak out of Jungkook’s bedroom to go to the bathroom. 
You wash up quickly, only to make it to the hallway and find his parents standing there, wide-eyed as they look at you in surprise. You realize you’re only wearing Jungkook’s shirt that falls just above your knees and you try to cover whatever you can with your hands.
“Hi, uncle. Hi, auntie,” you shyly smile. “This, uh, this isn’t how I wanted to meet you.”
“Well, we don’t really mind,” Jungkook’s mother smiles. “We’re just glad you’re here. It’s been a while since we’ve seen you.”
“I know. I, uh, I wasn’t dating your son yet the last time I was here.”
“And that calls for a celebration, doesn’t it?” She giggles. “That boy has had a crush on you since forever. It’s funny he never believed that we knew. He wasn’t exactly subtle.”
“It’s not the first time I’ve heard that,” you laugh back.
You hear a door open and before you know it, large arms are wrapping around your waist and a mop of hair tickles your cheek. Jungkook grunts against your neck as he says that he’s finally awake, and you cringe at his parents’ amused faces.
“Kook, your parents are in front of us. This is so embarrassing.”
“Nah, they don’t mind. They’re cool,” he says.
“Yeah, and my parents aren’t,” you sigh.
“So, I’m guessing your parents don’t know yet?” His father asks.
Your pout prompts him to explain. “Well, the day after you got together, our lovesick son here told our family about both of you. But he said that you haven't told your parents yet so we’ve kept it from them ever since. It’s hard since we see them all the time but we managed.”
“Kook also told us about what happened,” his mother asks. “He was grumpy all day yesterday and we got him to tell us why he was so upset.”
“I’m sorry,” you pout again. “That wasn’t my finest moment.”
You feel Jungkook’s hold on you tighten, his way of telling you it’s all okay.
“It’s alright, darling,” she smiles. “We know how your parents are, and their reasons come from a good place. We tried to make this boy here understand them and you as well. Firstborns carry immense pressure to meet expectations; he just doesn’t get it because he’s the youngest. But it seems that it’s worked out with both of you, and we’re glad it did.”
“He couldn’t resist me,” you shrug, to his parents’ amusement. 
“Uh, you’re the one who walked through the rain to come see me,” he reminds you, his head popping out of your neck now. 
“You wanted me to.”
He tickles you in response and you’re all laughing in no time. It’s a different dynamic with his parents, as Jungkook always had a very close relationship with them. You saw it as a teenager and now, you get to be part of it, too.
They finally let you go and ask you to have dinner with them tomorrow, and that’s one meal that you’re definitely excited to have. 
You push Jungkook towards the bathroom and then return to his room to dress up. It’s shortly after when you’re both walking the few blocks to your house, fingers interlocked as you give each other comfort.
You make it home and once you unlock the door, you can already hear laughter and clanking pots from the kitchen. You head there, meet Jimin’s smug face, and clear your throat to announce your presence.
“Oh, there you are. We were wondering where you were,” your mother says. “And hi, Jungkook.”
He greets your parents and from behind you, you take his hand again. 
“I went for a walk… with Jungkook.”
He clears his throat and you backtrack.
“I mean, I, uh, was at his place. That’s where I slept.”
“Oh?” Your parents say at the same time, their eyes looking at you in confusion.
“He’s kinda my boyfriend.”
“Kinda? Babe, I think I’m more than ‘kinda’ your boyfriend,” he exclaims. 
Your parents look shocked and next to them, Jimin is laughing in his seat.
“I mean, he is my legit, actual boyfriend,” you correct. “The new thing in my life that I denied is actually him. And the person who stands by me, who makes me enjoy the moments? That’s him, too.”
Their faces soften, and somehow that’s the comfort you need. Perhaps all the talking that you and your brother have done has gotten into them. You wouldn’t be surprised if they talked about it, too.
“Why didn’t you tell us, then?” Your mother asks.
“Because he’s not what you expected,” you sigh. “And I didn’t know how you’d take it.”
“Well, he is your brother’s best friend,” she points out. 
“Who’s had a crush on me since he was a teenager,” you explain.
“That’s… not surprising,” your father laughs. “We could tell.”
“Oh my god, Kook. You are not subtle,” you elbow him. You turn back at them. “But I… I didn’t know how to tell you because you expect me to have a partner who’s part of your world, you know? And Jungkook likes his freedom. He likes his art and… he really likes me. And I happen to really like him, too.”
“He treats you well? Makes you happy? He’s someone you can depend on when things get tough?” Your father asks. 
He smiles tenderly at you and you feel like crying.
“Yes, very much,” you nod.
“Then I think he’s everything we need him to be. A good partner, I’d say.”
You let out a sigh of relief. This is all you needed to hear.
“We’re sorry if you felt like you couldn’t be honest with us,” your mother shakes her head. “I guess we just needed some reminding of what we want for you and your brother. And well, Jungkook’s shown us his heart all these years. He’s always been a part of the family and he’ll be even more.”
They’re words that Jungkook didn’t expect would get him emotional, and he hugs you from behind just to steady himself. But it’s what makes your mother walk towards him for a hug, and your father surprisingly does the same. 
“Alright, I guess it’s fitting to have this family breakfast together,” your mother says.
You all take your seats at the dining table, with yours being next to Jungkook now.
Jimin cheekily smiles. “Well, if this whole dance thing doesn’t work out, I guess I can just be a counselor or family therapist or something.”
“Just don’t call your clients ‘stupid,’” you roll your eyes.
“I won’t. That’s only reserved for you.”
And just like that, everything is as it should be.
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You get through breakfast with lots of laughter, as you and Jungkook tell your own versions of the story while Jimin butts in to tell his own. It’s heartwarming to see your parents this way, especially when they tease your boyfriend about his crush on you growing up. 
But even they admit that they’ve depended on him all these years, too, and that they don’t doubt his loyalty and commitment to you. 
You share a tense moment with him after you all drop your parents to the airport, though. Jungkook has just unloaded all their things and as they hug you goodbye, your father teases.
“Just don’t welcome us home and tell us we're grandparents already.”
Jungkook dry laughs and so do you. That’s another topic for another day, you suppose, and while you’re still unsure of having a family, you just know it’s something you’ll both talk about.
You all get home soon after to wash up. Jungkook’s excited about how you’ll spend the day now that you’re both talking again, and you suggest hanging by the beach and then going out for dinner. 
Jimin says he’ll stay home to let you two make up for the past two days and so he could have that online date with Taehyung, and you agree.
You and Jungkook end up having a really good day. 
You go to a mall and walk around. He gets you a pair of stud earrings to commemorate the day you went official to your parents and you buy him a silver chain necklace for the same silly reason, but also because he looks really good in one and you want him to have more. It pairs real nicely with the shirt and joggers casual outfit he’s been sporting these past days, and the teasing look he makes after he puts it on reminds you of that one time his necklace was dangling on your face when he was pounding into you on your couch.
You get fruit drinks and snacks at the stalls you both used to buy from as teenagers, then you head to the beach where you lounge until sunset. You wade in the water, splash each other, and then make out when there’s no one around. 
You feel so free and light, so young and hopeful. These are the moments you love having with him, the ones you like to enjoy and savor and have more of. And you know you’ll have them for the rest of this trip and when you get back to Seoul. 
Jimin joins you for dinner at a burger place, then you all buy cup noodles and beer and head to your favorite park. It’s just like how most of your nights together go, just in the outdoors. You and your brother bicker and Jungkook referees; there’s also the occasional “you’re so cheesy” comment from you to your boyfriend and Jimin’s gagging sound. 
You confirm plans for the rest of the trip. Your parents will be enjoying Hawaii for close to two weeks, and you have all that time to rest and spend time with your two favorite people. You’ll be off work. Jungkook has some projects to finalize while you do your own thing, and Jimin will be watching dance shows to get him inspired. 
But there are more beaches and parks and villages to visit. There’s also that two-night stay at a resort you’ll be having. There are other sites and restaurants to go to, and you’ll be reliving your teenage years together while making new memories.
You’re now back at home, snug in Jungkook’s arms as he leans against the bed frame in your room, with you in between his legs. 
“Today was a really good day,” you say, turning to him after he kisses your cheek.
“Today was amazing,” he hums.
He smiles as he replays the scenes of you shopping for each other, frolicking on the beach, and walking around your favorite spots. They’re all so simple and things you’ve done before but today felt so much more. There was a look in your eyes that held such tenderness and care for him. You held his hand as if you didn’t want to ever let go, as if you didn’t want him to.
“I really like you, Kook,” you mumble, almost like a confession, as if it’s not known. “I don’t know how else to say it.”
His eyes soften, as does his smile that he’s had on pretty much the whole day. But he just looks at you, and though you know he feels the same way, you want to hear him verbalize it again.
“Hey, say it back,” you nudge him. 
“I love you though,” he says after a beat of silence.
You’re now the one who looks at him, unable to say a word. 
“Are you that surprised?” He looks back at you nervously, nibbling his lip ring. “I mean, I think it’s quite obvious, just like everything I feel about you is.”
“Kook, I…” you try, but you don’t exactly know how to respond. 
You don’t doubt his feelings but somehow you can’t help but think that maybe right now, he loves the idea of you and not you, and there’s a difference.
“I think I always have but I guess I didn’t realize just how much until this whole thing happened,” he continues, wanting you to understand what he feels. “I asked Jimin why it was affecting me so much and he said it’s because I put you on a pedestal. You were this dream I’ve had for so long that I admired from a distance and now I get to be with you and you’re… human, not some flawless being who doesn’t make mistakes. So when you hurt me, I faltered. That’s on me, too. Because I… I expected too much. And I’m sorry.”
His focus is on his hands that are playing with yours before he turns to you again.
“I realized that I wanted so badly for you to want me, that’s why it hurt. I wanted to be that person you cared for and trusted and needed because you’re all that for me. And when I saw you at my door last night, nothing else mattered but you,” he continues. 
“Whatever misunderstanding or mistake or disagreement, I learned to accept them and I just wanted you, in my arms, so I could show you that you’re all I need. I’ve dreamt of you for so long and this version of you is more than I could’ve imagined. And I just… I love you, okay? It doesn’t matter how you feel. I just need you to know that I do, and I don’t think I’ll stop.”
Your heart is about to burst, and all you could do is cup his face in your hands and kiss him, hard and deep until you run out of air. You kiss him eagerly because you’re desperate for his touch. You kiss him passionately because there are things you feel that you can’t put into words yet, and this is how you tell him. 
He’s quick to follow your pace, wrapping his arms around your waist as he helps you sit on his lap. Your fingers comb through his hair and grip his top and pull him closer, all while you grind against him and moan in his mouth. 
But when he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear and caresses your cheek, you go tender. 
“I love you so much,” he whispers against your lips, and all you feel is the warmth of his touch and how it’s all the comfort and security and stability that you need.
You slowly pull away and graze your nose against his. You don’t say anything else and he doesn’t expect you to. But you kiss his cheek and hug him, and you hear him sigh in relief.
He pulls away and cheekily smiles. 
“You know, there’s a song for this.”
“A—what?” You laugh.
“A song.”
He pulls away from you then stands from the bed. “Let me get it from Jimin’s room.”
You stare at him questioningly because you really didn’t think he could surprise you even more. He returns with one of his burned CDs and you ask him if he has a sex playlist or something. 
“I used to daydream about you to this,” he says, as he puts it in the CD player that your parents got you for your 17th birthday. “I listened to it after that very kiss we had and, well, we’re back home rehashing so many memories and I kinda just want to fulfill another fantasy of mine.”
He plays the song and the first notes get you all giddy and excited and nostalgic and very much turned on. 
“This was my favorite song,” you say, as you signal him to come closer.
“I know. You played it all the time, I could hear it from the other room.”
You giggle, and it’s a sound he wants to listen to forever. 
“So, what’s this fantasy of yours?” You ask, as you take your shirt off.
He licks his lips at the breathtaking sight of you, but he softens at the fairy tattoo on your shoulder, the one he customized and that you love showing off.
“Just… make love to you while this plays in the background,” he manages to say. 
Your face softens, too, and it’s a sight he also wants to see everyday of his life.
“I’m all yours, Kook. Do whatever you please.”
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It’s a week later when you tell him. 
You’d just gotten back from that short trip to a resort that had you relaxed and stuffed with food. You video called with your parents during their sunset cruise and your father once again teased about not being grandparents yet and just like the first time, you brushed it off. 
You’re lying on Jungkook’s chest as you laugh about Jimin’s terrible bowling skills. And in the silence, he asks, “does it bother you that your parents expect you to have kids?”
You knew he’d picked up on it the first time, but it’s just now that he’s bringing it up.
“A little. I try not to think about it though,” you sigh. “It’s another one of those expectations, you know? But I guess it’s a harder thing to talk to them about, that I don’t know if I want kids.”
He just hums and combs your hair with his fingers.
“Does it bother you?” You ask, suddenly feeling nervous. You know enough this is a make-or-break for many people. 
“Not really,” he says. “It’s not easy to raise a child, much less carry one, and that’s something I can’t do for you. But I guess, it doesn’t matter. We can have kids. Or not. We can have a dog or a pet tortoise or a fish, really. When I think of a future, all I see is you. The rest is just a bonus.”
He speaks of your future with such certainty. He’s always talked about enjoying the moments but the one version of a future he wants is the one where you’re with him. 
“I just want you to know that whatever you’re worried about, share it with me. I don’t want you to worry about me. We do this together. We figure it out together,” he adds. 
And just like that, the fears and pressure you feel slowly dissipate. He’s the only version of the future you want. Everything else is just a bonus. 
You turn to him with a kiss on his cheek. 
“I love you, Kook. I don’t want anyone else to love me, and I don’t want to love anybody else,” you whisper like a plea, just like a promise. 
“I’m not loving anybody else,” he kisses you. 
And it’s his own promise he makes.
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meyerlansky · 2 months ago
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i'm very 👀 about what bucky's family situation looks like, actually. historically, his dad died in nov '42, so he's only six months out from it at the start of the show, but it never really comes up—he doesn't flinch or offer anything back when gale talks about his dad, which... maybe he had a good relationship with his dad, so he doesn't have anything to offer. but he doesn't look at gale like he's surprised at cleven sr being a bad dad the way i'd expect a character with a fairly happy, uneventful home life to react to "my dad left me sleeping on benches"-level bad parenting. and if he DID have a shitty relationship with his dad, that's the perfect moment to empathize and bond over it. but he doesn't take it.
and then we get the revelation that he doesn't get any letters in the stalag. obviously he's not getting romantic letters, but one of the other guys mentions a letter he got is from his mom, with equivalent relief and comfort to gale's reaction to marge's letters. in so doing the show establishes that letters from family presumably count for the conversation the bucks have wrt having someone to get letters from. bucky's mom is still around. why doesn't he at least get letters from her? he's got two sisters, historically—one's three years older and the other's six years younger. both ages that wouldn't exactly hinder sending letters to your POW brother. but nothing.
initially i was gonna say i have trouble believing that bucky—who wears every emotion he has plain on his face, who's so stupidly easy to read that everyone thinks they know exactly what's going on with him in every scene, and who has a hugely visible downward spiral when his preferred options for coping with STUPENDOUS AND COMPOUNDING traumas are taken away from him—either:
has so solidly processed his dad's recent death inside six months that he doesn't need to externalize any reaction to it, or
is somehow better at keeping the details of how he feels about his family close to his chest than he is about basically every other feeling he's ever had
and it's still possible that his relationship with his family is simply unremarkable and there's nothing deeper to it. or that he had a bad relationship with his dad, but not any worse than your average "my dad and i didn't get along great" kind of deal, not cleven-level bad. but... i dunno, man, i have trouble buying THAT, more than i have trouble buying that the situation is deeper than bucky lets show.
his MOTHER doesn't even write to him. and we don't find this out until he's been stalag'd for over a year. so he... does actually keep it pretty close to his chest. more importantly, he keeps it close to his chest when it's something he could use to strengthen his relationship with gale. that doesn't really fit with the read of bucky as an open book looking for anything he can get from gale. like... it doesn't fit with that read of him at all.
it feels way more likely to me that there's Bad Shit there, and that that Bad Shit extends beyond bucky's relationship with his dad, into his relationship with his mom and even into coloring his relationship with his now-adult sisters. something like being kicked out, or disowned, or bucky deliberately going no-contact. and that's interesting on its own—what could he possibly have done to lose his entire family like that? my personal guess is he got caught with a boy and got kicked out over it, but it could be hetero slutting around too; it could be the drinking or the gambling or not going to school or his parents just fucking suck absolute ass, or any number of things that aren't Picturesque Rural Wisconsin Family appropriate
but also. i'm really fascinated by the sense of... isolation, i guess? that this confers on him as a character. he's such a loud, eye-catching presence In The Moment, and i wonder how long it takes the people around him to realize that he only seems to exist In The Moment, and doesn't have a past he's anchored in enough to discuss it even with the people he's closest to.
like how long does it take gale to realize he's spilled his guts about his dad to bucky, in a way that very clearly carries some level of "i'm letting you see something no one else has seen" feeling with it... and he got nothing back of equivalent weight wrt bucky's family, not just in that conversation but at any point that we see on screen? months? years? does gale EVER realize bucky's hidden/neglected to share his past even after gale's given bucky his?
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impishjesters · 1 year ago
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Comforting a Scared Child Reader
warning(s): Jax, Caine, and Bubble are warning enough... A/N: These turned into less of a direct comfort and more of a how they'd distract them... sorta... though to be fair it wasn't gonna be very detailed given I had to write everyone... I think if I re-did these properly I'd only do a couple of characters to elaborate on. I don't think Bubble was intended, but I included him because of chaos. Needless to say, I think most of them would kinda suck at comforting a scared child, but they'd definitely put on a strong front to try and comfort them. request: Please can you do some seperate prompts of each circus member and ai comforting a scared child reader?
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Pomni
She’s not the ideal person to comfort someone but she knows what it’s like to be new and scared—plus when she finds out you’re only a child??
Pomni tries her best, she really does—it’s like seeing you scared and shaking gives her barely just enough courage to step up and comfort you.
She’s not one for touching but if you need a hug while she’s around she’ll likely give you one.
It doesn’t take a genius to know she’s about as shakey and anxious as a chihuahua, but she tries her hardest to come off as calm and normal for your sake.
Pomni gives off anxious first-time big sister vibes.
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Jax
Also not an ideal person when it comes to comfort, but he can only imagine how terrified you are right now.
The others are adults and can handle his bullshit, you however are a child and he’s not about to bully a child. As tempting and funny as the thought is.
Jax uses his jokes—on a less insulting, more child-friendly level—to try and calm you down. When he gets you calmed down and the two of you start to get buddy-buddy? Oh, it’s over for those suckers.
It takes the whole gang to try and prevent Jax from turning you into a mini Jax, though he does let you tag along for the more minor kid-friendly jokes and shenanigans.
"Who the fuck leaves a child unsupervised to put on some weird sketchy headset??"
Jax gives off the cool, prankster big brother vibes.
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Gangle
She’s just barely holding it together on a good day, but the moment a child shows up scared and crying? Big sister mode activated.
Gangle’s the type to try and calm you down with stuffed animals or art depending on just how young you are. She’s got all sorts of craft stuff and a collection of stuffed animals, she even lets you pick one out to keep for yourself.
While in big sister mode, she’s a little more protective and worrying, trying to keep you from getting hurt by Caine’s little games or away from Jax’s nasty behaviour.
Unlike Pomni, Gangle likes hugs and is always willing to hug you or hold you if you start to miss home or your parents.
Gangle gives off the protective big sister vibes.
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Kinger
Surprisingly, Kinger is the best out of all of them when it comes to taking care of a kid. He’s the quickest to get you to stop crying and the quickest to distract you from those scary thoughts. He’s also the first one to ask for your permission before picking you up with ease.
Out of all of them, he’s the one who watches after you the most—sure it’s a joint effort in babysitting you but he’s the one who watches after you the most.
If you’re particularly young he’ll probably carry you around or hold your hand—even if you could technically walk away with his hand, at least he knows where you are.
Similarly to Gangle, he’ll find something you like and either play with you or talk to you about it. God, if you also have an interest in insects like this man then he’ll tell you all sorts of useless facts and stories, all the gross picture books.
Kinger gives off warm, golden retriever dad energy.
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Zooble
Not surprising Zooble isn’t great with kids, and not great with touch either. It’s not they can’t carry you but they’ve only really got one good arm to carry you with and it’s just…awkward for them.
That said if they see you fidgeting or picking at some part of yourself in an anxious-like fashion they’ll offer up their left arm for you to fiddle with. It’s a little more sensor-friendly to fiddle with if you exclude the pointy claw bits, they make sure you don’t hurt yourself. It’s not the most pleasant feeling having their limb messed with, so it doesn’t happen too often.
Zooble doesn’t really do much with you, but if you find yourself wanting to sit with them instead of play with the others they won’t protest. On occasion, they might play with you, or read you a book or whatever as long as it doesn’t involve them doing much.
Zooble gives off relaxed, lazy big sibling energy.
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Ragatha
Similar to Gangle she gets her shit together when a child shows up, her chipper optimistic shtick comes in handy when it comes to comfort. She hasn’t had to deal with a child in a really long time though—were they always so…loud?
Ragatha’s the second one who watches after you the most, if she had it her way you’d never be around Jax, he’s a bad influence. But if you like playing with him then the most she can do is stay close by and make sure he doesn’t do or say anything badly. (Man’s gonna give her a heart attack)
Similar to Kinger and Gangle, she’ll play with you and let you join in with Caine’s less dangerous games. She’s nervous to play hide and seek with you but if you really wanna play she’ll set an area limit so that you don’t accidentally get hurt.
Ragatha gives off frantic first-time mother energy.
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Caine
Doesn’t know the first fuckin thing about children, well he does but he’s never actually interacted with one.
Thank heaven for the censorship, he doesn’t want that foul language anywhere near your young little ears.
Caine’s the worst person to be left alone with you, not that he’ll be bad to you no, he just won’t understand that while he’s trying to keep you entertained and happy it’s probably a huge safety risk. If the shit the adults experience is dangerous god only knows what he might subject you to by accident.
Despite everything, Caine is actually pretty good at getting you to stop crying. It helps when he can quite literally snap his fingers and poof a random toy you might like or something else he thinks is cool.
Caine gives off crazy Uncle vibes that you only get to see during big family get-togethers because he has a habit of causing trouble on accident.
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Bubble
For the love of all that is holy. Do. Not. Leave. The. Child. With. Bubble.
I take back what I said about Caine being the worst to leave you with, Bubble is the worst. Well, they both are but still.
While entertaining (and disturbing) to watch Bubble do stupid stuff, everyone will tell you not to do what he does—or say what he does, in fact just pretend he doesn’t exist. He’s a bad role model.
NO. STOP. DON’T EAT THE SOAP. I DON’T CARE THAT HE SAID IT WAS TASTY. HE CAN’T TASTE. YOUR GONNA TAKE THE WORD OF A LITERAL TALKING BUBBLE?
Bubble is that dumb dog that eats its own vomit because it can, that’s his vibe. Don’t be a Bubble.
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lizzieisright · 10 months ago
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Trust exercises
Abby, your friend, helps you with some of your therapy homework (just fluff, no smut)
-/-/-/-/-/-
It doesn't happen often, but sometimes before your scheduled meetings (since two adults need to schedule hangouts) you go to therapy, which means you come to Abby's place after therapy.
Sometimes you're happy, sometimes you're sad, sometimes you don't come at all, and Abby understands.
When she first met you, she thought you were the most kind, sunny human being - you were so nice to her, and Abby couldn't help but try to spend more time with you. You gladly let her and soon you two were practically inseparable - Abby trusted you, shared her worries and fears, even the stupid ones, and you supported her through it all. You were soft and kind to her, and you told her the stories of your past which made her cry. This is why Abby didn't notice that you didn't share anything from your present, not anything deeper than a complaint about work.
Abby knew you were in therapy - who wasn't in this economy? - and she thought you were so nice because you were healing. But during one of your shared evenings in Abby's apartment you both got drunk, very drunk, and you spilled something.
"Do you know why I'm in therapy?"
"Because your childhood sucked and your parents can eat shit for that?"
"Well, yeah." You laugh. "I have like, major trust issues."
"You?" Abby stared at you, even though she saw two of you by now. "Really?"
"Yeah." You nodded and even if Abby was super drunk, she noticed how your voice was strained.
"Fuck." Abby sighed, not really having a better response in this state of mind. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"So I can regret it later? No."
It stuck with Abby later, and she couldn't let it slide, so she talked to you about it. You were very reluctant about sharing what are your triggers, but the fact that you told her some things was already groundbreaking. (I won't ever ask for any help and I hate when people baby me, you told her, and it meant that when she bought you coffee you got literally offended - which led to another "you need to tell me if I hurt you because it's unfair" conversation, which led back to "If I could trust you, I would")
So Abby started getting more gentle with you - it rarely worked, but you always reassured her she wasn't the problem, which broke her heart even more.
But slowly, even through you shot her some weird looks when she took care of you in any way, you started to accept it. You started talking to her little by little, and Abby was happy - even if it was "holy fuck I cried me eyes out last night, kill me please" message. You shared some of your feelings, and Abby couldn't help the protectiveness she felt about you. You were so nice and kind to everyone and you were so lonely and broken inside it made Abby angry at anyone who made you feel like this. So she tried to give you everything she was able to.
One day you came from therapy, eyes red and puffy, your face empty and you just asked if Abby could cuddle you. Abby felt like she won life this day - won a glimpse of your trust.
So today you came after therapy as well, grumpy as fuck, which looked cute on you - Abby couldn't help her adoring gaze when she looked at you, even if you gave her a weird look now and then. It wasn't agressive, but Abby knew you struggled to accept she loved you for who you are, even though that was something you desperately needed.
"I have fucking homework." You told her and Abby laughed: you hated when your therapist gave you homework, since it was embarassing and you wanted to throw up.
"What is it?" Abby asked as she heated some food for you: which was also a struggle for you, accepting her care, but you were trying your best. These small things were just a trial before bigger things, and you promised to at least handle this for now.
"Fuckin' trust exercises." You sighed and rolled your eyes, but Abby saw through you: you wanted to do it, wanted to see there was someone you could trust. "You know this shit when you fall back and someone catches you? Disgusting."
Abby laughed and placed the plate in front of you, nodding when you said thank you.
"It's scary."
"It fuckin' is. And I don't want to do it." You grumped and Abby waited. "I mean I do, but I'll hate every second of it. Anyway, the point of this is, will you do it with me?"
Abby saw how it physically disgusted you to say it, and she knew it was your reaction to being vulnerable, so she just smiled: you hated being vulnerable, but she couldn't express how much it meant to her that you chose her to be vulnerable with.
"Of course."
"You don't have to, obviously-" Here you go again, Abby thought.
"I want to. I don't go to gym for nothing, I won't let you fall." Abby flexed her biceps and you got flustered.
You both knew you liked each other, and you flirted all the time, but Abby didn't rush you: you couldn't handle her heating the food for you, you were not ready to be in a relationship by any means. So Abby was waiting for you, calm and sure one day she will get to kiss you and you will accept her love.
"Thank you."
"And don't you fucking dare to do something nice for me in return, I'll kill you."
"...Fine."
You look so uncomfortable with the whole idea, but Abby knows you'll push through anyway - you are a masochist like that. So you stand in the middle of her living room, Abby is relaxed and just waits for you to go through your conflicting emotions.
"I'll catch you, I promise."
"I know that. It's not what worries me." You tell her as you fidget with your fingers. "It's so fucking scary."
"Well, you're not here alone. I'll hold you after."
You struggle again with accepting this, but you don't reject her - every time when this happens Abby feels proud and happy: you are trying to trust her.
"Okay, can we like. Start with smaller distance? I don't think I'll be able to do the whole metre."
"Of course."
You stand awkwardly with your back to Abby, barely twenty centimeters away from her - if Abby leans down, she will be able to put her head on your shoulder. So this is not even the fall exercise, you're going to lean on her.
"Holy fuck." You curse. "Okay."
You're so tense and anxious even like this, and Abby stretches her arms by your sides, letting you see she is supporting you. So you slowly lean back until you feel your back touch Abby's front. She is solid and warm, and she hugs you, holds you, and it's almost too much, and you want to cry. Abby is safe and Abby loves you and really, it's too much.
"I've got you." Abby tells somewhere in your hair and you break. You sob quietly and move away: it's unbearable. "Too much?"
You nod, not ready to talk and embarrass yourself.
"Do you want me to be quiet?"
You shake your hand yes and no, and Abby understands.
"Okay. Want to try again?"
You nod again and go a little further: if Abby doesn't catch you, you will fall, but not painfully. Again, her arms are stretched out and you take a deep breath before letting yourself fall back - the air gets stuck in your lungs from a millisecondary fear, but then you feel solid warm Abby who chuckles into your ear, but keeps quiet, even though she wants to tell you how proud of you she is - and you feel saved. It's strange, but the relief you feel is visceral and you want to cling to Abby's arms around you.
"Okay." You sigh, the anxiety leaves your body as adrenalin gets replaced with dopamin. "Okay, I get it."
"m?"
"Like. I'm so scared when I fall, but because you catch me, I instantly feel safe. What kind of pavlovian shit is this?"
"Are you suggesting we train you into trusting me by doing this every day?"
"It might work. I wanna do it again."
And then you get giddy and giggle when Abby catches you for the seventh time, the dopamin doing its job. Abby is happy to help, especially since she gets to hold you and be there for you and lets you see you are safe with her. It's a long way down the road, but eventually you'll get there, and you will trust her.
Abby can't wait.
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thasugarplumfairy · 4 months ago
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how can I be a better cunt to my boyfriend?
1. Let Him cheat in peace
2. Always be in shape. Never be overweight
3. Don’t bother Him with your emotions
4. Suck and fuck on command
5. Overall shut the fuck up and do what He says
Further Explanation:
1. Men can’t even really cheat. That’s not a thing that applies to them. Polygyny is natural. Men are supposed to be fucking a lot of bitches. Cunts on the other hand are not meant to fuck around. Cunts since the dawn of time have been owned. So cheating is only something a female can do. Which if a bitch cheats she should be subjected to getting her ass beat and humiliated because how dare a stupid bitch ever treat a Man like that. Bitches need to learn respect, some learn by hard knock university. I digress. Modern standards have unnaturally forced monogamy onto Men creating unnecessary misery and hysteria. Females need to learn it’s not her place to control what dick does. It is Men’s place to control pussy though. So if your man wants to go out with his buddies and bring a broad home and give her some dick. This is normal, natural and you shouldn’t mind. You should be happy he’s enjoying himself as a Man. If he wants to fuck his ex. Good for him. Tell him to fuck her balls deep and that you love him. If he wants to text other females cause no issues. But never ever do the same. You’re a cunt. You belong to him. You only talk to him. You only have sex with him. Everything you do needs to be approved by him. Don’t make him beat your ass.
2. No man wants an overweight bitch. Only losers men fuck fat bitches. Keep your weight in check, keep it toned. Be a good looking bitch he’d actually want to show off.
3. If you’re feeling lonely or insecure that’s not his problem. All your emotions are yours to deal with. Be an adult. Every time you feel lonely serve him in some type of way. Do his laundry, make him food, bring him a beer. Compliment Him. Everytime you’re feeling insecure suck his dick and look in his eyes. Give him whatever other hole he wants. Thank him for the privilege to suck dick. I promise you these aren’t pointless this is how to actually connect with your Man. If it made sense to feel lonely you wouldn’t have a Man to serve. If you had a reason to feel insecure he wouldn’t fuck your holes. Whatever you do don’t gripe or whine. Never works the way you want it to. Also remember females are unnecessarily emotional and Men aren’t which is why they shouldn’t deal with your emotions.
4. No matter what no matter when. When that Man wants his royal penis serviced you fucking do what the point of your existence as a female is. You should look at his penis as royalty, deserving nothing but the best attention and care. Public sex, while driving, with your parents in the other room, after he pissed you off, if he disrespected you, beat your ass, humiliated you, just had dick in a bitch you hate- no excuses! You drop to your knees and suck his cock with love and devotion. You bend over or spread pussy however he pleases. And as always thank him for giving you the privilege to experience dick
5. God is a Man. Men truly are the prize. Men have all the power. Men control the world. So when a Man chooses you to be with any cunt should be honored. You should also know He can easily replace you. You can’t replace Him. His life is better without worrying about a cunt. Your life is worse without the presence of a Man. Cunts need to humble themselves and always be thankful for your Man’s presence. So don’t cry like a dumb bitch if you catch him checking out another cunt. Don’t scream and yell if he’s fucking the neighbor cunt. Don’t cause issues if he’s fucking cunts from his past. You need to prove you’re a better cunt by shutting the fuck up. You need to prove you’re a better cunt by cleaning up happily after every mess. Prove you’re better cunt by keeping yourself cute, featherweight & happy to be around him at all times. Only when he wants though, don’t be clingy and annoying that will lead to Him resenting you. Prove you’re a better cunt by obeying his words. Prove you’re a better cunt by keeping his dick wet. If he wants you to look a certain way - obey. If he wants you to cut off your friends and stay home - obey. If he wants dinner ready by 6:30 - obey. If he says he wants to fuck other women while you stay home- obey. I’m sure you get the gist.
Men wants a stress free female they can rely on to be a good cunt.
This list is exactly how you do it.
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what-even-is-thiss · 7 months ago
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Hi roman. I know this is very weird, but i've seen you give some life advice to other people, so i thought i could give it a try too. Don't answer if you don't want to. Anyway
Do you have any advice/tips for a 15 y/o who thinks they just have no control over their life? Like, my concentration is dog shit, i think my grades are slipping. My executive dysfunction so bad and i think i'm disappointing a lot of people. I have no idea how to handle anything in my life. I can't force myself to do the things i need to (not that that'd be any good, i'll immediately cry lol). I just, don't fucking know how i could make things better for myself. And i can't really talk to adults about it, they'll repeat the stuff i already know, and i am the worst person to put their feelings into words, so they'll prob never understand. Not in the edgy way.
Yeah so sorry for half venting into your ask box. Thank you in advance if you'll answer it, if it's too weird and you don't want to do that for whatever reason, that's ok. Peace and love <3
Dude, you’re unfortunately suffering from being 15. And possibly a learning disorder. Godspeed to you.
And I don’t say that to belittle your problems. In many ways as a teenager you don’t have control over a lot of things. You’re still under the control of your parents, you’re still learning how to deal with adult level emotions and ideas. A lot is expected of you and a lot of things are made to seem more important than they are. It’s hard to tell what’s actually important and what’s just adults blowing things out of proportion. It sucks and it’s frustrating!
If you can, you might want to talk to a counselor. If your parents or guardians are anti-counseling you might try to talk to someone at your school like a teacher or administrator or school nurse about the possibility of getting counseling without your parents knowing. Some schools have programs like that.
The adults closest to you might not understand but if you keep looking you’ll eventually find someone who remembers what it’s like to be in your shoes.
And I remember fully feeling like I’d never get control over anything. The end goal of life was graduation from high school and god only knows if I keep existing after that. But the thing is, you do! You keep existing and you figure a lot of stuff out. Wisdom does come with time, it turns out. And legally and practically you end up getting a lot more autonomy as time goes on.
And I know hearing things like this might not feel comforting. When you’re stuck, you’re stuck and no matter how much you logically know it’ll get better right now it sucks.
Just find ways to keep going. And try asking for help sometimes. If your family won’t listen, find someone who will. Take the time to write down your problems and how you feel if you can’t come up with explanations of what’s going on. Or find a friend to talk it out with so you can practice explaining yourself.
If there’s one thing I can promise you, when you’re a couple years into adulthood all of the problems from your teenage years start to feel small. At the time they were big and important though. And that’s what you’re going through right now. And a lot of adults forget about that. Hang in there, and when all of this is behind you, remember how hard it was and maybe someday you can help someone like you.
I’m sorry if all that wasn’t helpful. I don’t know too much about your individual situation. But ask for help when you can. Someone out there understands. You’ll find them.
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myosotisa · 1 year ago
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Hmmm you know, I’m always down for that you’re in a new relationship, just been recently going out, and it’s that first time with a new partner. Can be awkward, can be fluffy, who knows? The world is your oyster. 😏🩷 also love you immensely
your brain is so big and i chose to make it funny. love you so much Luna!!!
3rd Times the Charm
ǁ summary: The 2 times you and Steve tried to have sex for the first time and the 1 time it actually happened.
ǁ tags: mentions of blood and injury (not graphic), mention of needles/stitches, fem!reader
ǁ word count: 1.5k
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The first time you and Steve tried to ‘consummate’ your relationship did not go as intended. You’d planned it in advance – a nice dinner followed by a romantic and cheesy walk in the park. The ending was set for your place because you had a bigger bed and your roommate was supposed to be gone.
Key word: supposed to be.
The two of you had gotten distracted in the hallway. Steve had one hand on your hip, the other on your jaw, and was pressing you flat against the wall with his body as he sucked your lower lip into his mouth just to watch it pop back into place again. You both knew what the plan was and the anticipation to finally fuck your boyfriend of 3 months had been building the entire night.
If the denim erection pressing into your hip was any indicator, then Steve was just as excited as you were.
After some careful coaxing both by your breathless murmurs and your fingers twisting in his hair, you were able to convince him to let you go long enough for you to get your keys out and unlock the door. Although, you really only got halfway through doing so before he was pressing up against you from behind, wide palms settled on either hip, and his mouth teasing at the skin on the side of your neck.
The two of you stumbled into the apartment together, his arms wrapped tight around you as he used his foot to kick the door closed. It only took another scarce few moments before he had you pressed against another wall, this time with your back still to his front, and his hands wandering from the fronts of your upper thighs all the way up to cupping them under your tits. Each graze of his warm palms lit you aflame, forehead pressed to the drywall as you closed your eyes and tried to regain some composure despite Steve intentionally trying to drive you into a frenzy.
That was when the two of you heard the first sob.
As it turns out, the one night you and Steve had planned to have sex for the first time ended up being the very same night your roommate got dumped. The two of you peeked around the corner into the living room, fully disheveled and panting, to the sight of her curled into a ball on the couch. She was completely inconsolable and the moment she saw you, she was begging for a hug and someone to talk to.
There was nothing you could do to weasel your way out of this situation to go try to hook up – not when she was crying face down in your lap with Kelly Clarkson playing on the loudspeaker. And Steve, absolute god tier boyfriend that he is, ran his fingers through your hair to settle it, pressed a kiss to your temple, and shared an understanding smile with you before asking your roommate what kind of ice cream she wanted from the convenience store on the corner. He returned no more than 15 minutes later with a spread fit for a heartbroken young adult and with multiple RedBox DVDs that the 3 of you watched into the night before you all fell asleep on the couch in a mountain of blankets and pillows.
The second time you and Steve tried to “consummate” your relationship went even worse. The idea of ‘Sex sent me to the ER’ is all fun and games until it happens to you.
It was very spur of the moment at a party – one of your mutual friends had planned this huge celebration at their parents fancy lake house. The two of you had gotten suited and lotioned up, drove the hour out of town to the property, and spent the entire afternoon roasting in the sun on jet skis and getting thrown off inner tubes behind a speedboat.
You’d had your eyes on Steve for hours and you were completely unapologetic about it. He was wearing a pair of navy swim trunks, a white linen shirt that was fully unbuttoned to show off his chest hair and golden skin, a pair of aviators perched on his nose, and with his hair sunkissed and windblown.
He’d taken over driving the speedboat with a beer in his hand and the steering wheel in the other, gunning it across the lake and throwing people off their rafts into the water with absolute joy and taunting yells across the wide open spaces. It looked like he was born for this, like this was him in his element, and you had actually never been more attracted to him than you were under that May sunshine.
When the sun set, a bonfire was lit and the speakers came out. Snacks and drinks, alcohol and non, were flowing steadily as people alternated between sitting by the fire and talking, pushing each other into the lake or the pool, and a few people even started dancing down by the water. You were all sunburnt and lazy with the first heat of the summer, heavy and slow with relaxation. And honestly… Horny as hell.
The two of you had stumbled into a shed on the property with greedy hands on warm skin and in slowly drying hair. His mouth was ravenous as it trailed from your own to the salty span of your neck and down to suck bruises into the sensitive skin on your chest. He’d pulled back after a few minutes, chest heaving beneath his open shirt and pupils blown wide as he looked you over. Told you he wanted you more than anything but was worried about your first time being in a fucking shed. You, completely drunk on him and not caring about anything else, informed him you didn’t give a damn and you needed him inside you like yesterday.
The grin that lit up his face was brighter than the summer sun of the day.
It was all blooming feelings and barely contained moans until he knelt down to give you some well overdue attention between your thighs. He had trailed kisses down your stomach as he dropped down without looking before you heard him suddenly hiss out through his teeth at the same time something shifted beside you and he fell away. Still slightly dazed, it took you a few moments too long to realize he had fallen onto his ass and was gently cradling his shin because it was now quickly pouring blood.
He’d knelt down and sliced his calf on a gardening tool in the shed. A blade that, after pulling out a flashlight, you confirmed was covered in rust.
The two of you spent the next 4.5 hours in the emergency room – earning Steve a tetanus shot and 2 other injections as well as 10 stitches and a prescription for antibiotics. As soon as you both confirmed that he wasn’t going to lose his leg or something, you couldn’t help but laugh. The sun and fun had lightened your minds and made something like having to go to the ER because Steve tried to eat you out in a shed feel like a story to tell, and nothing worse than that.
While it probably could have happened sooner, you and Steve finally got your chance the day after Steve’s stitches were removed. He’d shown up to your apartment early on a Saturday with a packet of baked goods for breakfast and a cup of your favorite from the corner store. All completely unprompted and he insisted it was just because he wanted to do something nice for you after your week at work.
The two of you had a slow and comfortable breakfast on your balcony as the morning sun rose higher in the sky. The moment you were both finished eating, you’d wasted no time in climbing into his lap and making up for lost time.
It was slow and thorough; each of you taking your sweet time in learning what made the other tick and shiver. It was hours between your sheets in the late hours of the morning with all the time in the world to explore each other.
And, while it was well worth the wait, you certainly had a lot of time to make up for.
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mehmetminded · 4 months ago
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Turns out I’m not done with Eithan. This has probably been said better by smarter, more sober people, BUT!!!
Eithan is the ultimate burnt-out-former-gifted-kid.
All his life Ozmanthus was the best. He was the smartest, strongest, coolest, most badass dude to ever do it, and he could never be anything less. When he was a kid this was great! All the adults said he was super smart and that was super cool! Sure he left his friends behind, but he’d make other friends at some point! Just as soon as he gets this whole “cultivation” thing figured out…
Can’t be too long…
Any day now…
Fuck…
Now he’s a monarch who focused on being the most efficient cultivator alive and he has a reputation as a cold, friendless, genius that no one really likes and that everyone is super afraid of. Not exactly prime friend material.
“Oh well” says Ozmanthus, “This place fucking sucks and you’re all a bunch of bitches. Later!”
[one ascension later]
“Hey look! A bunch of heavenly people who don’t think I’m a friendless weirdo! I should go talk to them!”
[mass casualties]
“Okay, friends weren’t that important to me! Guess I’ll go back to the ol’ standby of self-imposed isolation and cultivation!”
Oz kept this up until he solved Heaven and became the Grim Reaper. Shockingly, this did not make him any friends and oh look: we’re right back where we were on Cradle with a reputation as a cold, friendless genius that no one really likes and that everyone is super afraid of.
That lasts a couple thousand years before he has a bit of a breakdown and does the judge equivalent of moving into his parents basement.
He goes and tries to fix some “small” problems and finally clean up that pesky hunger madra problem this shithole has. He fucks it up completely, burns down the house, and has to move in with his weird relatives in another state, where he finally makes some friends in the form of a baby gym bro and a knife girl.
I cannot emphasize enough how literally just having friends changed this man’s life. He went from brooding, cynical, anti-hero to goofy, comedic relief/mentor figure in like 3 years.
All it took was numerous life or death struggles, the death of a significant portion of his family, an entire hero’s journey, and a clash for the fate of the multiverse!
The moral of the story is, find someone to match your vibe or you might oops your way into being Death? I guess? Idk I lost track of this one a while ago…
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hobicakess · 2 years ago
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IT WAS THE MONSTERS: 1
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SUMMARY: You were born with the ability to see and spot spirits and monsters. From vampires to werewolves, demons, ghosts, and ghouls. Now, as an adult, you use this “gift” to help your clients overcome their worst demons. The “gift” you had never really caused you trouble now that you’re an adult, but you guess some monsters don’t like psychics who interfere with their fun. 
RATING: 18+ (i am not a babysitter, you are in control of what you consume.)
PAIRING: ot7 x reader | poly!au
Warnings: violence, eventual Polyamory talks of reincarnation, reader is too stunned to speak, destruction of property (damn vmin) inaccurate descriptions of paranormal activity & demon/spirits cursing terrible therapist reader has a purple eye small mention of religion, vmin chaos
A/N: I spent so much time procrastinating this sorry hotties. Only at least 1k word, but It took so much out of me.
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Second sight has been passed along your bloodline from generation to generation. Due to unfortunate circumstances there was a sudden stunt in its flow for at least eight generations, until you were born. Your mother complained throughout her pregnancy that she’d see visions of you in your past life but it was waved off as a delusion. When you finally graced the world, your father says there was a flash of something in your eyes, a purple gleam that danced there as he held you.
At least, that's the story you get when you ask about your eye.
Playful spirits yanked at your puffs and pulled out your barrettes and often caused your silky pressed hair to frizz. Some monsters take their time to torture you by sitting in your closet or under your bed, lurking in the shadows. Middle school was definitely your worst era. You had random outbursts and twitches that caused people to push away from you. It wasn't even your fault, but what could you really say?
Being that you were the first in two hundred years to be sighted, you had no one to teach you how to control this so-called "gift" At least that's what others liked to call it. There are many that call you blessed, and you'd beg to differ. Growing up, this curse always gave you nothing but trouble.
“It’s not me! it’s the monsters!” That's ridiculous really.
Your parents took you to therapy for it but you could see the deceitful demons sucking and clinging onto them, so that never helped you at all. They were so quick to throw you a bottle of pills that it eventually stopped working.
  As you get older, you learn to ignore it along with learning to be patient and more even tempered. During high school you were weird and lowkey, wearing huge black sunglasses from freshman to senior year. They helped block out your sight and question's about your eye.
You managed to make friends with a werewolf though he left unannounced in the middle of senior year.  You guess he shifted early and went away to his home where people like him roamed freely. Graduating as a below-average person, you decided to say fuck college and open your own business.
Identifying the demon. This wasn't hard for you, since you literally saw the demon sucking the life out of a person
A “palm reader” ,  “physic” , “witch”, “Woman Jesus”. There were many terms that your clients and random people called you. Your job was to find your client's demons and attack them.
Any addiction, health issues, relationship problems. These were all caused by parasitic demons and they thrived off sucking the life out of regular people. You didn’t have the qualifications to banish anything by force, so you did help many people in a safer, smarter way with three easy steps. 
Acknowledge them
Taming them
 And the most common among all parasites are lust demons. 
Their job was to suck you completely dry and leave you broken. Most people were too far gone before you could save them, but the ones who weren’t you changed their lives greatly. One night while you were closing your shop, two men walked in, one short and blond, the other dark haired, and taller than the other. They were both dangerously handsome and the energy that came from them was hot, sensual, and angry. The blond stormed up to you hissing, eyes turning an unnatural shade of black. “So you’re the one putting us out of business?” 
Staring at his face, you could definitely tell this was one of the men disrupting the lives of so many men and women in this area. Most of your clients have complained about these two being a one-night stand at some club, then as days go on they invade their dreams, and every single thought. Jimin and Taehyung, the dynamic incubus duo. 
You’ve never had a demon come directly to you for butting into their affairs. You guessed these two were fearless, but fortunately the underworld had rules. If any entity killed someone on second sight, they’d be banished back to hell for eternity, and by their energy you were sure these two parasites have been around for a long time.
“I’m sorry gentlemen, I'm not sure we’ve met?” You tilt your head, clenching your purse strap up on your arm. Taehyung scoffed, walking around your shop touching a few things every now and then, with a flick of the wrist, the shelf on the side of you tumbled to the ground. 
You squeak, moving out of the way, tripping and knocking over a display table filled with tarot cards. “You are the only one in this miserable town with real second sight.” 
While Jimin talked, Taehyung walked through your shop dropping shelf after shelf. 
“No screaming tongues, or holy water.” the crashing of shelves halted and only the thud of Jimin's boots coming towards you could be heard.  “Your banishing is less dramatic, more modern, effective and so you.” 
You jumped at the sound of your crystal ball shattering above your head, making you scream, as tiny shards of glass cut into your hands. “Y/N L/N, that is your name now?”  
When Taehyung spoke your name, the walls began to vibrate as did your body. 
You were speechless, scared, and confused. They talked as if they knew you from another lifetime. You can't say you didn't believe it was possible, since you saw devious things every day, but it was still nerve-racking to hear. ''Maybe we should just keep you little princess, and bring back those old memories ”
“Ah taetae, I don't think this is our little princess, just a sad little human of no morals or knowledge” Jimin appeared in front of you, bending down to you, hand burning into your skin as he lifted your chin up to meet his blood red eyes surveying your skin.
“Though you still possess an untouchable beauty”
 Your shop began to shake and tremble, all the shelves had fallen, glass shattering and books spinning around the three of you. 
Standing, he made himself very loud and clear, “Don’t let us hear your name again,” and for their grand finally the front windows of your shop shattered around you.  
TAGS: @tinymesblog @leilei-9 @starrlo0ver @uarmyhore @mageprincess @lachimolala22019
@eclecticranchzonkcookie @thedarkwinterrose@hey-syia  @djodjom  @scuzmunkie 1  @ilover ubberduckiez-blog  @jamlessstars @rinkud
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risingsoleil · 9 days ago
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does aang, katara, toph, or sokka ever hear or catch Lin and Tenzin going at it in the house?
Toph and Aang overheard them destroying Tenzin's room.
They were in their late-teens (18/19 ish)
Aang wanted to burst in there and put an end to their intense lovemaking. The ground was trembling around his room, almost broke through the floor tbh.
Toph stopped him and said "we're gonna handle this like adults, Twinkletoes."
"Yeah, we'll give them the talk about intimacy and how children happen and--"
"No, we're not fucking doing that. In fact, maybe they want a kid right now."
"No! They're still young!"
"Well, we fought in a war at 12 years old, so I don't see how being 18 and 19 is too 'young' to have kids."
Toph made Aang shut up and they had to kinda stakeout nearby so they could wait for those annoying horny teens to finish.
When Linzin finally comes out, they pale and realize that one of their parents is waiting. Tenzin's face turns red. Lin is nervous, but holds her head up high bc yes, that's right. She just got railed big time and good!
They expect a lecture and to get yelled at, but instead:
"Kid, you should try sucking Junior off in a headstand, and make him eat you out like that too. You get off really good."
"MOM!"
"AUNT TOPH!"
"Toph!"
"Another move you should try is the splits on top of Junior."
"Mom, please! I'll take whatever punishment, but please dont torture us with sex tips."
"Why? You sounded too loud, so I'm worried that you're faking it with him."
"Aunt Toph, pleaaase! We won't do this again."
"Tenzin! Have some backbone!"
"Come on, Lin. You know him. You can be honest if he's not making your legs shake properly."
Aang wants to sneak away and forget this ever happened.
Toph traps Lin and Tenzin with her torture about sex tips, and Tenzin is ready to give up all future sex before marriage.
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soukokumychildren · 8 months ago
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Short stories part two in comin' guys! Idk how much I've made since the last one, so here goes-
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Chuuya: I can't fuckin' hear ya! Kunikida: Well, fine, I'll come clos- Chuuya: IM TOO BUSY NOT LISTENIN' TO YA
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Tachihara: My disguise is flawless! Chuuya: Oh yeah? does not know who this guy is What does it look like? Tachihara: brandishes his signature band-aid Chuuya: Raises brow Tachihara: puts it on Chuuya: jumps like a cat HOLY SHI--TACHIHARA?! WHERE IN THE EVER LOVING FUCK DID YOU COME FRO-
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(Chuuya doesn't like people touching him)
Chuuya: choking on carrots Someone random: I know the heimlich, I know how to help! Chuuya: frantically yelps NO! dies
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Fukuzawa: All I ask is for you to hug them. Chuuya: looks frantically at Shin (I will not give them the high and mighty title of Soukoku) Y-you're kidding. Awkward chuckle. Fukuzawa: Fatherly raise-eyebrow look. Chuuya: Eheheh…eheh…oh come on… Also Chuuya: Slowly looks to Shin and specifically looks at Akutagawa Atsushi: Awkwardly raises arms Chuuya: Stumbles over, tries to raise his arms to hug them both and pulls away last second Nope. Nope. Can't do this. I'd rather vomit. I actually can't look at his face. Jogs over to where Dazai was while watching from the side-lines Dazai: Chicken. Chuuya: Oh shut up, dumbass. You would have killed them had they touched me. Hiss.
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Dazai: Wanna see a magic trick? Chuuya: takes a moment before he understands Oh shit- Atsushi: OOh, sure! Dazai: grabs Chuuya before the avian can escape Guys, c'mere!~ Chuuya: DAZAI NO-DON'T YOU DARE YOU SWORE TO ME- Kunikida, Ranpo, Kenji and Yosano: Wander over grudgingly except for Kenji Chuuya: Fuck fuck fuck fuck let me go- writhing and flapping his wings but iTS NO USE Dazai: Watch, guys. Scratches the back of Chuuya's ear Chuuya: Takes a few seconds of silence but then bursts into a ball of aggressive purring Yosano: Oh my god. Kenji: ✨ 0 ✨ Kunikida: O_O Ranpo: Trying so hard not to laugh Atsushi: QMQ W-w-wh-wha- Dazai: Tehdahh!! Chuuya: Fuck--purrr---you shitty--purrrrr--DAZAI--PURRR somehow gets away with wings flapping in his wake as he runs to the bathroom Also Chuuya: Oh my---purrr---fucking god. That shitass promis-purrr..purrr.. F u c k. I'ma revoke the keeping him alive policy, I--purr--swear to GOD-
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Chuuya: "Fuuuuuck you." Dazai: "Fuck you!" Chuuya: "Fuck me, then, coward!" Dazai: "Sure thing you needy little shit!"
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Bram: There used to be a plethora of werewolves during my time. Such things were most common.
Chuuya: …Hmmmm. I can kinda like…get you something as close to a werewolf as I can.
Bram: Please do, I'd be most grateful. It has felt like a millenia since I've last encountered such a common kind that seems so terribly uncommon in these parts.
Chuuya: Disappears, and from the distance: Yo, Atsushi!
Also Chuuya: drags Atsushi by the scruff back to Bram and throws him on the ground like a sack of potatoes Here he is. He's more of a cat though, really. But he's still got the moon shit goin' on.
Bram: This pathetic mongrel? Looks mildly disappointed
Chuuya: Yeahhh, I know. This guy sucks, but he still got the semi-werewolf going on.
Bram: Do you perhaps have anything more than this…creature?
Chuuya: Er..unfortunately….no.
Atsushi: …I have ears, you know. Still on the ground
Chuuya: Pretend you don't and let the adults keep talking.
Atsushi & Bram: …
Atsushi: Screw this. Sits up and walks away
Chuuya: grabs him by the scruff again He's just a tad stubborn. If he turns into a full tiger under the full moon, do you think that'll help?
Bram: Sigh I suppose…there's certainly only one way to find out.
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Dazai: Addressing Chuuya’s parents your son calls me daddy too ^^ Chuuya: DAZAI WHAT THE FUCK—
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C: Don't make this worse. D: Define worse-
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Chuuya: You’re bullshitting me so hard right now. Dazai: …. Chuuya: claps hands great, when do we start?
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Chuuya: a cowboy? Eh…I’m not big on riding horses. Dazai: but you’re big on riding me? Chuuya: huh? Dazai: Stupid shit eating mischievous look Chuuya: gets it oh—OH FUCK YOU—
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(Opinon: This one is shit)
Chuuya: tries making a nest Dazai: not helping Chuuya: Dazai, ya ass, come here and help! Dazai: but I’m disabledddd Chuuya: oh fuck off. We’ll see how disabled ya are when I make you carry all the shit we’re gonna get from the store. Dazai: blinks since when are we going to a store? Chuuya: since now. Get the fuck moving. 20 minutes later at a department store (I think)
Dazai: Y’know, you remind me of the stereotype I heard on the internet. Chuuya: mmmm? Dazai: where women have a knack for comfort in bed, so they have an exorbanatly large amount of pillows and blankets? Chuuya: comes close and hisses Ain’t my fault that I’m half dragon and in need of a nest! Fuck off about the subject or so help me, damnit!
….so the nest was built afterward, and Dazai served timeout in the corner for 20 minutes instead of snuggling with Chuuya in his new nest
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Chuuya: twittering Dazai: listens to him and knows he's saying something but doesn't know what Atsushi: joins on the conversation, growling and snarling to Chuuya Chuuya: twitters and whistles back Dazai, feeling jealous: You guys have a secret language now!? No fair!!
~~~~~
(Part 2 kinda)
C: Starts twittering to Atsushi A: Growls back to him to start the conversation A few minutes later…. C: Gasps and comes out of animal speak "YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" A: "Nuh uh!" D: Quickly comes in and grabs Chuuya before he could whack the shit out of Atsushi C: "LEMME GO!" D: "Chuuya calm down-" C: "That mother fucker is going to FEEL MY WRATH-"
----------------- (This could be either counted as au or canon, but here's a funny short anyway)
D: I'm gonna fuck you, Chuuya. C: You mean fuckin' kill me, right? D: …. :) C: You…mean fuckin' kill me….right?
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Chuuya to Dazai: Here, hold this gives him his gloves and ring Chuuya: Goes over to Clthulu HEY SQUIDDY! Clthulu: Turns around by jamming its tentacles into the earth and spinning its massive body towards Chuuya Chuuya: I hope you glued those tentacles on tight. Oh grantors of dark disgrace, do not wake me again. Corruption insues
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Chuuya: I identify as an asshole. Grins and puts hands on hips Dazai: And I identify as the dick. Chuuya: … Dazai: … Chuuya: Gets it OH YOU DICK- Dazai: Case in point ;D
-- That's caught up to the most recent ones! Enjoy :))
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restinslices · 5 months ago
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Could you possibly do a scenario where the reader goes to Johnny and asks him for romantic advice because she has a crush on Kitana or Mileena? “Man I’m desperate, I had no idea who else to ask.” Type of scenario.
This kinda short. It only has 1101 words and idk if I fully like this but fuck it, we ball. Idk why I’m so bad at fluff😭
Content Warning: Johnny
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The word “crush” was typically used by children. Almost everyone has had a crush in their younger years. Someone in their class, or a random person in a hall, or someone in a higher grade level. Even celebrity crushes are usually talked about by younger people. Because of this, people tended to foolishly think that having a crush would no longer be a thing when they got older.
You were one of those people. Unfortunately, you found out that that way of thinking was false.
You hoped it was simply attraction when it came to Kitana, but the more time you spent together, the more you realized it went beyond that. Everything about her was perfect. Her hair, her smile, the way she’d scoff when hearing something stupid, her need to protect her family and defend the innocent. That was just a small list of what made Kitana amazing. 
You groaned and put your head in your hands. You were so pathetically in love with her and had no idea if she’d ever feel the same way about you.
”I’m almost done with the story. Relax” Johnny elbowed your arm and smiled at you. For weeks you debated on whether or not you should ask someone for advice. It couldn’t be Liu Kang, because that felt like asking a parent. Kung Lao and Raiden were busy training new recruits, so you didn’t wanna bother them. Any other allies like Syzoth, Ashrah, Kuai Liang and Tomas were busy with other things. Bi-Han… well… you couldn’t ask him for obvious reasons. You probably wouldn't have even if he hadn’t betrayed everyone. 
That left you with one other option that was in Earthrealm. Johnny Cage.
Pros? Johnny had plenty of experience with romance, so he had to have some sort of advice.
Cons? Johnny is Johnny. Johnny tends to blab about his movies, like he was doing now. To be fair to him though, you hadn’t worked up the courage to admit you wanted his help. It just seemed strange to have to ask for help with a crush as an adult. 
You lifted your head and looked at him. You don't know what he saw on the other side of his shades -or why he was wearing shades indoors- but it must've tipped him off that something was wrong. 
“I have a feeling you're not worried about whether or not the movie had a happy ending”. You rolled your eyes at his joke. You hadn't even been listening the whole time he was talking. 
“Absolutely not”. Johnny leaned back against the couch and sucked his teeth. 
“You sure?”
“Positive” He booed at you, which made you swat his arm. “I got serious shit I need help with”. He looked at you as if saying “go on”. So you did before you'd say nevermind and run out of there. You let it all spill out. How much you liked Kitana, how you had no idea how to make a move on her and other pathetic sounding things that came out before you could stop it. When you finished, Johnny sighed and took off his shades. 
“And of course you came to me for help” he said with pride. “I am a love expert”
“Please!” You scoffed. “I just had no one else to go to. You're a last resort Cage-”. He put his finger against your lips to shush you. 
“Shhh… it's okay. I'd ask myself for advice too if I were you- hey!” he pulled his finger back when you tried to bite him. “No biting the love expert”. 
“Already regretting this” you mumbled. Johnny either didn't hear or didn't care. You had your bets on the latter. 
“So you want Kitana? Now that's a woman! You're gonna have to be real smooth to earn her heart”. Those weren't really helpful words but you kept listening anyway. “Kitana seems like she'd love confidence. You can't be all small and scared. You gotta walk with confidence”. He pulled you up to your feet after he stood up. “Puff your chest out”. 
“What?”. Johnny moved to your side and pushed on your back, making you slightly arch and your chest raise. “This feels ridiculous”. Johnny shook his head. 
“Women love confidence. Kitana loves confidence. This gives the image of confidence. Now walk with confidence”. 
Walk with confidence?
You started to walk how you usually did but Johnny stopped you immediately. “No! Walk with confidence!”
“What the hell does that even mean?”
“You gotta walk with long strides but a little slow. Like a model”
“You want me to walk slow?” You looked him up and down with distrust. “Why?”. 
“It'll give her more time to look at you”. You felt stupid, but you did it again and again until Johnny was satisfied. It felt more like bootcamp than love help. 
“Now here comes the confession part. The trick…” you leaned in in anticipation. “Don't”. 
“Wha-”
“No questions without a raised hand”
“I'm gonna raise my hand and beat you with it”
“And I will prosecute you to the highest extent of the law”
“AnD i WiLl-”
“Do you want Kitana or not?”
“Of course I do!”. Johnny put his finger to his lip in a shushing motion. You sucked up your pride and stopped talking. 
“Now, you don't wanna confess. None of that 'oh I love everything about you. I think you're so beautiful and intelligent’ nonsense. You approach her-”. Johnny put back on his shades, put his hands on his hips and got uncomfortably close. “Listen babe, you and I… we could be something. You're diggin’ me and I'm diggin’ you. This Saturday we got a date”. 
“Shouldn't I ask instead of telling her to go on a date with me?”. Johnny shook his head at you. 
“You do that and you don't seem confident! Remember confidence is the key!”. 
This made no sense. So let's recap. Johnny wanted you to puff your chest like a peacock, walk like a model and tell Kitana that you two were going on a date instead of asking? 
Maybe you should've just googled this. 
“Um, okay… great talk Johnny” you patted his shoulder then walked towards the door before he could protest. “Great talk. Brilliant talk. Enjoyed it. I'll remember it!”. You closed the door behind you and sped walked to your car, leaving Johnny alone in his house. 
Once you got in your car, you sighed. Well… that was something that happened. You pulled out your phone and went to the voice notes app. 
“Note to self. Never ever ask Johnny Cage for love advice again”. 
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narcissisticpdcultureis · 7 months ago
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NPD culture is
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YOU ARE AN AUTISTIC KID ENTERING SCHOOL
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DUE TO YOUR DISTINCTIVE AUTISTIC RIZZ KIDS DON'T REALLY LIKE YOU
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KIDS EVENTUALLY START BULLYING YOU BECAUSE YOU DON'T STOP TRYING TO INTERACT WITH THEM
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ADULTS IN YOUR LIFE TELL YOU THAT IF YOU STOP PAYING ATTENTION THEY'LL STOP BUT THIS IS BULLSHIT
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AS A BONUS YOUR PARENTS GIVE YOU MIXED MESSAGES ON THEIR ATTITUDE DEPENDING ON IF THIS DAY YOU'RE A "genius child who knows numbers and can remember 30 facts about sharks every day" AUTISTIC OR A "unfunctional puppet who is out of energy and can't even write 5 words on her homework and only wants some peace and a nap and doesn't want to do any intellectual bullshit" AUTISTIC TODAY
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HOWEVER ONE DAY YOU DISCOVER THAT IF YOU HAVE SOME SORT OF POWER ARTIFACT ON YOU, PEOPLE CAN TREAT YOU LIKE A LIVING BEING AND NOT LIKE A ROTTING PILE OF TRASH
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PARENTS ARE MORE NICE WHEN YOU BRING HOME GOOD GRADES
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CLASSMATES WANT TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOU WHEN YOU GET A PHONE WITH GAMES AND LET THEM PLAY
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TEACHERS DON'T NEGLECT YOU WHEN YOU BEHAVE AND SUCK UP TO THEM
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NPD WIN! NOW YOU KNOW THAT TO BE LIKED BY OTHERS YOU HAVE TO BE SOMETHING YOU'RE NOT AND YOU'LL BE LOVED AND CHERISHED PROPERLY!
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... ONLY FOR A SHORT WHILE THOUGH! REMEMBER, YOU CAN'T WEAR THE MASK FOR LONG! IT STARTS TO SLIP BECAUSE YOU ARE AN IDIOT WHO CAN'T DO THINGS RIGHT! AND WHEN YOU LET THE MASK SLIP AFTER TWO THREE DAYS OF PROPER BEHAVIOUR, THE HATRED IS BACK! THE DISGUST IS BACK! THE ANNOYANCE IS ALL THE WAY IN!
@
It got less intense with time, though. As you grew out of elementary and out of middle school, people became more decent. Sure they don't like you, but they care abouy their reputation now. They know that if you see a weirdo you just have to wait until they're gone, that saying someone that you want them dead is rude, and that bullying is a waste of their precious time.
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BUT YOU KNOW! YOU REMEMBER!
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AND WHEN YOU FAIL A TEST, YOU REMEMBER HOW MOTHER USED TO YELL AT YOU AND TEAR OUT PAGES FROM YOUR NOTEBOOK SO YOU OVERWRITE YOUR HOMEWORK BECAUSE IT LOOKS INCOMPREHENSIBLE!
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AND WHEN YOUR DESK MATE IS NOT SITTING WITH YOU BECAUSE SHE'S. WELL. SICK AND CURRENTLY AT HOME, YOU REMEMBER HOW NOBODY WOULD SIT WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU WOULD DISGUST THEM TOO MUCH FOR THEM TO EVEN TOUCH YOU, LET ALONE SIT WITH YOU OR TALK TO YOU!
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AND WHENEVER YOU SEE A TEACHER THAT ACTS LIKE A TEACHER YOU REMEMBER THAT IF YOU DON'T TRY ENOUGH YOU'LL BE HATED AND NEGLECTED AND HAVE YOUR COMPLAINTS DISREGARDED BUT IF YOU TRY TOO HARD YOU'LL BE HATED TOO BECAUSE NOBODY ASKED AND LET OTHER PEOPLE ANSWER AND SHUT UP PLEASE
@
You will always know that people hate you. They showed you that when you were supposed to learn how to interact, so now that's what you learned. You know that you have to do your best to be treated like a person. You know that everyone still treats you like trash and hates the very existence of you but by occasionally throwing in something redeeming you can try to survive a day. You know that your parents are your friends, as long as you perform well and are a good daughter they can show off like a medal. You know that your peers are your friends, as long as you're funny but not like you really are good but not best not best but not horrible communicable but not clingy but like things they like but don't like them too much but express some emotions but not too much wtf but talk to them but not speak too much and speak enough and do enough but not too much but you know what forget it, just be a comic relief to keep them entertained (but not genuine or they'll hate it). You know that teachers are your friends but... Oh, they're not, sorry. They're like parents, but don't care about your success, they're more unstable than children and more crushing than parents and you have no idea how to suck up to them in a way that makes them treat you well
@
You figured the world out! Except you fucking didn't.
.
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atopvisenyashill · 2 months ago
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Hey! Just wanted to say that I read your post on Jaehaerys and his daughters — pretty horrific, especially in how it really isn’t that much of a stretch to see the evidence of you’re looking for it. I’d always read Jaehaerys as being a monstrous father to his daughters, especially Saera, but your commentary on Gael was particularly convincing.
I haven’t been able to read through all of your thoughts on this, but I was wondering if you noted Jaehaerys’s strange reticence to outlaw the ‘right of the first night’ (F&B, 263-265)? Gyldayn writes the passage as if Jaehaerys treats the issue dispassionately, but he also says that Jaehaerys was “sympathetic but reluctant,” “uncomfortable,” and that Jaehaerys “threw up his hands” when Septon Barth agreed with Alysanne that the practice was vile. Could tie in with your idea that Jaehaerys showed an entitlement over control of his daughters’ virginities, just as he sought to protect his vassals’ ‘right to the first night.’
Another point that stuck out to me on a first read that I didn’t know what to do with until now was Gyldayn’s assertion that “until the reign of King Jaehaerys, the ancient right to the first night had been invoked mayhaps more oft on Dragonstone than anywhere else in the Seven Kingdoms” (F&B 429). Which implies that the practice happened after the Conquest, too. The only possible perpetrators would be Aegon the Conqueror, Aenys I, Maegor the Cruel, Aegon the Uncrowned, and Jaehaerys, as the only male Targaryens old enough to do so before it was outlawed at the end of 58 AC. What do you think?
Thank you for the compliment first. I do agree I think the Saera and Gael parts are the most solid, and of his children, I think they're the ones most likely to have experienced some sort of overt sexual abuse from their father. I guess if you want My Opinion and not just Meta About His Behavior, I think Jaehaerys was likely molesting Saera starting around when Alysanne starts miscarrying and is put on bedrest, and moved onto Gael after the Second Quarrel ended. I think the freaky stuff with Alyssa, Daella, and Viserra was more likely some deeply weird parenting decisions from Alysanne although I cannot stress enough that I do think there might have been like. idk the beginnings of weird behavior with those three (Viserra's drinking, wanting to marry Daella off so young, Alyssa's sex obsession) that was likely cut off before any of the girls would clock it as inappropriate due to their marriages. I also think it's likely he molested Viserys and Alicent; with Alicent it was probably very similar to the Saera and Gael stuff (and...I think it's likely both Alicent and Otto knew when Alicent walked into that room what was going to happen) and with Viserys it was more along the lines of that repeated "older Targaryen takes younger Targaryen out into Flea Bottom to get fucking and sucking" a la show Daemyra, Visaemon, and Aegond, but probably Jaehaerys (being like, old, creepy, lonely, always imagined that when Viserys was young and skinny he looked much more fem which is part of why he starts Eating His Feelings as an adult, because he feels it makes him more masculine looking, that's just me tho) got handsy and Viserys just kinda let it happen figuring it was normal, so it escalated because Viserys wasn't really fighting it.
As for Jaehaerys and prima noctus...yeah, I think it's so fucking weird and not talked about enough that he really needs to be talked around into outlawing it, and he only starts to give on this after Barth, a man, starts to speak up against it. Before that in the conversation, Alysanne and him are really going back and forth and he is not giving her any ground here. He even seems to defend it when it comes to Valyrians (of course) which I also think is nauseatingly glossed over when it comes to discussing how whack Jaehaerys is about sex and women. And people always wanna say like "oh i bet it fell out of favor post-Conquest" yeah we have no fucking evidence of that. It's the same when people are like "Baelon can't be Ulf's father Baelon would NEVER-" Baelon is a paper thin character who canonicly usurps his beloved brother's niece, you cannot say with any sort of certainty that that man wasn't up to some nefarious sex crimes just like 80% of his relatives. As a matter of fact, I have kinda wondered if the show's little brothel escapade thing is a take on this - that perhaps it was incredibly common for Targaryen men to take younger male relatives out into the villages on Dragonstone and find some newlywed maidens to molest. Especially because like, Orys is mentioned as an example of this, and he has his own last name (rather than being called a Orys Waters), so it makes me incredibly suspicious of what in the fuck Aerion Targaryen was doing and teaching his kids. I think its very likely that Maegor, Aenys, and Aegon the Uncrowned were up to heinous shit like that and it's completely glossed over by Gyldayn because it makes them look bad.
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