#have loved the touya is dabi theory since day one!

[missrosegold]

someone new

Synopsis: Post-war!AU. It’s the quite moments that Touya enjoys the most. Sometimes he still has a hard time believing they’re real. That you are real.

He has no problems allowing you to remind him of the latter.  

Word count: 16K

Paring: Dabi x Reader (fem!reader)

Warnings: Mentions of post surgical interventions, Touya has hints of survivors guilt and some suicidal idealization if you squint, Smut and additional warnings listed below and on A03 so Minors or Ageless Blogs please DNI. This is rated 18+

Playlist: Omar Apollo - Evergreen (You Didn't Deserve Me At All)

Authors notes: Written for @shibaraki Komorebi collab! Thanks for having me love! Hope you enjoy!

Title is from Someone New by Hozier

**You can read it on A03 here if the formatting on Tumblr is throwing you off! I cross-post all my works onto my A03 account!

Sometimes Touya wonders how he got here.

It’s a loaded question and he knows as much. He knows exactly where he is, and he’s painfully aware of the series of events that led him to this moment in time – but he often finds himself struggling to believe it.

A part of him doesn’t want to believe it – a gnarled, still-angry part of what remains of his soul is convinced that it’s all part of some elaborate dream – one that will fade away and leave him alone and bitter once more as soon as he opens his eyes.

He falls asleep again and again, trying to prove his theory, but every time he wakes back up, he’s still in the same place:

He wakes up in your sun-lit apartment, more often in your bed, with you – always close by, never too far away.

It’s where he is even now: nestled into the soft sheets of your—no, the bed you shared together, even though it’s pushing noon on a Tuesday. Despite his body screaming at him to move, he can’t bring himself to get up just yet.

It’s not like it matters if he stays in bed anyways, he doesn’t have anywhere to be. He doesn’t have his court mandated therapy appointment until Thursday, and it’s not like he has a nine to five job like most people do. Christ, he can’t even leave your apartment building without you or a Pro-hero escort with him. (Who, ninety-five percent of the time ends up being Shoto, since he’s about the only person who wants to deal with him these days aside from you, his mom, and sometimes Fuyumi and Natsuo.)

He rolls over slightly and listens for you, trying to hear the tell-tale tread of your footsteps echoing through the halls, or the sound of you humming a gentle melody under your breath as you do your menial chores around the apartment; before it finally occurs to him that it’s a weekday and you’re at work.

He stifles a groan as he finally pushes himself up, and makes his way towards the bathroom connected to the master bedroom, flicking on the light and shutting the door behind him.

That was his biggest problem these days: not wondering when his next meal would be. Not obsessing over ruining his father’s life as he had done his. Not charring himself past the point of no return as a means of exacting vengeance upon the world of Pro Hero’s that had long since turned their backs on him. No. That was all in the past.

For the first time in his life, it was boredom that was getting to him.

That was a joke if he ever fucking heard one.

Looking at himself now it’s hard to believe that he was once a homicidal serial killer, with a rap sheet several miles long.

He looks different now. He fights the urge to snort as he turns away from his reflection in your bathroom mirror while he goes about his business.

Like a snake that sheds it’s skin every couple of years, he’s changed his form once again; though this transformation wasn’t up to him. He had no choice in the matter; what happened to him after the war was decided for him. His opinions be damned. (Though, if he thinks about it, he didn’t really give All For One and his fucked up scientist permission to piece him back together after he incinerated himself up the first time. The irony almost makes him laugh.)

He forces himself to face his reflection in the mirror as he begins the painstaking task of his skincare routine – burning turquoise eyes staring a little too long at who looks back at him.

The worst of his burn scars are gone, though the shadow of them remains. His two-toned flesh has been concealed by pale, raised skin, but he can still see the lines in his face from his first Escharotomy – a reminder of Dabi; always lingering, never fully gone, even if he wears a different face.

The rest of his body is like that as well. No longer is he marred by wicked burn scars and surgical staples; he is one even skin tone now. He is complete by all accounts, even though he feels anything but whole. The skin grafts aren’t perfect – they’re textured and prone to drying out, and the skin around his eyes always looks bloodshot – but for the first time in years, when he looks in the mirror; the person staring back at him actually looks like Touya.

It's not a perfect visual, but it’s still closer than he ever thought possible.

Truth be told, he still has a difficult time looking at himself in the mirror. It’s jarring honestly. He’d gotten so used to seeing the horrific scarring on himself, that seeing his reflection without them makes him feel like he’s staring at someone new.

The skin grafts he received at some point after his barely responsive body was all but dragged off the battle field, still itch sometimes, but he knows it’s all in his head. He can’t feel anything. He hasn’t been able to feel anything since he was discharged from the hospital he been taken to after he collapsed.

His memories of that time are hazy – he had been doped up on heavy narcotics and other nerve blockers as he was subjected to surgery after surgery in a desperate attempt to fix his scorched body – so much so, that he doesn’t know how long he was out for, or how much time passed while he was in recovery.

He remembers Shoto coming to visit him shortly after waking up from the worst of his many surgeries, and explaining that while the doctors had been able to successfully graft new skin onto him, (how his mangled body had been able to withstand another set of skin grafts was beyond him), they hadn’t been able to fix his damaged nerve endings, and had opted to cauterize the few that still worked; leaving him completely numb to any and all feeling.

Truthfully, he hadn’t cared at the time, he hadn’t been able to feel much of anything for years before that, and the little he was still able to feel was nothing but chronic pain, so at the time he has seen the news as a blessing.

And then he met you.

Shortly after that, he found himself cursing the fact that he couldn’t feel anything at all.

-----

He remembers the first time he met you.

After he had been cleared to leave the hospital, he had been taken to a heavily fortified psychiatric ward, eerily similar to the med-bay in Tartarus: all sterile white walls and armed guards. His room hadn’t been much better: just a mid-sized white box with a cot and a small window for him to look out of, though there wasn’t much of a view outside. He had no idea where the fuck he was anyways.

There he had started his rehabilitation. 

It was hell. The first few months he spent there, he adamantly refused to speak to any of the doctors or physiatrists who came to work with him. Some were more persistent than others, poking their nose into his past (like he hadn’t just aired his dirty laundry out for all of Japan to witness), and those were the ones he got pissed off at the most.

In another life, Dabi would have had no qualms about turning the doctors to ash, just like he had done to everyone else who had annoyed him in the past, only; he wasn’t Dabi anymore. He wasn’t sure who he was now.

It didn’t help he had been hopped up on quirk blockers that canceled out his quirk, otherwise he probably still would’ve tried to incinerate them. But he couldn’t, and for the first time in his life, Touya Todoroki was fucking cold.

Turns out his quirk did a wonderful job of insulating him against the ice he kept hidden inside his chest all along.

He supposed he couldn’t blame them for rendering him quirkless while at the facility. Hell, he’d render himself quirkless if he was a staff member, having to deal with someone like him. Footage from the fight with his father and the all-out brawl with Shoto had been leaked to the public, showing his quirk’s true power in all of its devastating glory.

He had been told the aftermath of both fights had done irreversible damage to the surrounding areas, and no one was sure if they’d be able to fix the carnage he had created.

Good. The bitter, angry part of himself thought when he had been inadvertently told of the news. Suffer like I am.

He had been kept in isolation most of the time as the doctors tried to figure out what to do with him. His family hadn’t been allowed to visit him yet, and for that he was grateful – he hadn’t been particularly keen on seeing them after his recovery anyways. It was still too soon to face them, and he wasn’t ready to deal with the inevitable aftermath of what was to come. In the meantime, he still refused to respond to any of the medical staff who came to try and work with him, outside of sarcastic remarks and biting jabs that made the whitecoats squirm in their seats, much to his enjoyment.

Curiously, during one of the very few times he did speak to one of the doctors responsible for his treatment; he found himself asking about what happened to the rest of the League. Of course, no one would give him any answers aside from the fact they were alive and they were in custody.

He was more relieved than he thought he would be.

More time passed, and he still refused to open up to any of the staff who came to see him, though he had become more vocal with them – aggressively so – to the point he started to notice there was a continuous rotation of people now; it wasn’t just the same staff he was used to seeing when he first arrived at the facility.

Turns out, even the professionals were still scared of him – quirk or no quirk, his fiery reputation preceded him.

Eventually, the facility couldn’t keep cycling through their therapists, so they had switched tactics. Whether it was out of desperation, or the fact he made so many professionals break down after a session with him, he wasn’t sure, but he can’t say he regrets his actions, because in the end, he met you.

He remembers the day you met for the first time.

He had been forced out of his little cell and taken to one of the treatment rooms where he spent most of his time outside his own room. He had been shoved in there before he could make a snarky retort, and then… he saw you.

You had been sitting on the couch adjacent to the spot where he normally sat during his apptioments. He had been so stunned to see someone new, he’d been rendered silent. You’d looked up towards him, and for the first time since he arrived, you smiled at him.

“Hey.” You’d greeted him casually. He hadn’t responded, still unsure of who you were and what you were doing here instead of the usual staff.

You nodded to the couch across from you. “You wanna sit?”

He sat.

He fully expected you to introduce yourself, but you hadn’t. You’d just leaned back into the couch you were seated on and crossed your legs, giving him a content smile as you regarded him casually.

A few beats of silence passed. You didn’t speak and neither did he. A few minutes passed, then a half hour, and then an hour. Finally, one of the assistants came to bring him back to his room.

He stood up to go but you still didn’t say anything. He’d allowed himself to be taken back without a fuss but, he didn’t think anything more about it. The next day it was the same thing. He was taken out of his room back to the same treatment room, and surprisingly, you were already there waiting for him.

You gave him a little grin and nodded to the couch opposite you, and just like the last day, he sat.

Once again, you didn’t say anything, which was unusual, since all of the other doctors had always started off the conversation, but you sat in silence across from him – the gentle smile never leaving your face all the while.

A half hour of silence passed before he finally broke. “So, what exactly is this?” he remembers his voice sounding dry and scratchy after weeks of misuse. “This the part where you try and butter me so I’ll talk to you?”

You’d grinned at his remark. “No.”

“No? Then what the hell are you doing here? Is this some new technique the therapist’s showed you to try and get me to spill my guts to you? Reverse phycology or some shit?”

“Nope. None of that I can assure you. Actually, if I’m being honest, I’m not even a doctor.”

That caught his attention.

“The hell do you mean you’re not a doctor? How the are you in here then?”

“Maybe I’ll tell you later.”

He remembers being completely caught off guard by your answers, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t the slightest bit intrigued by you. He remembers squinting at you carefully – taking you in – and for the first time, he saw you. Really saw you.

He could tell that you weren’t lying to him about not being a doctor. You were dressed casually, though you were still covering up a fair amount of skin – no doubt something they told you to do ahead of time. You looked more alive than the rest of the staff in this place as well.

He was loathed to admit it, but you were pretty.

He remembers you flashing him a knowing grin, clearly able to tell he’s been shamelessly checking you out, and it was enough to make him recede back into his shell; his walls going back up once more, as he rolled his eyes condescendingly at you.

“So what’s your angle then?” He’d asked you. “You’re not a doctor but you wouldn’t be in here with me if you didn’t want something from me.”

“Would you believe me if I told you I was simply here to talk?”

That had gotten a laugh out of him. A short breathless laugh, but it was the first one he’d uttered since he’d tried to incinerate himself along with his father. It felt weird leaving his throat, foreign even, and he’d cut himself off as soon as the sound exited his mouth. So, he settled for snickering instead.

“Really now? You want to talk to someone like me? Why do I not believe that?”

You had sighed, and leaned forward so your forearms were supported on your knees, fixing him with a stern gaze. The intensity of it had made him flinch before he remembered who he was. He returned the look best he could, but it hadn’t deterred you in the slightest. Instead, you sighed again.

“Look I’ll be honest with you: the staff here filled me in on your situation. I don’t know what they’ve told you, but from how it was explained to me; your family wants you back home with them. They’ve made a bunch of deals with the authorities about getting you out of here and not spending the rest of your life behind bars, but you have to successfully go through rehab first. The reason you’re here is so they can determine that you’re not a threat to society or to yourself, but the staff don’t seem to be having much luck getting through to you, and they’re desperate. They sent out a request to bring in outside help and I applied. They picked me because we’re the same age, and well… no one else really wanted to. Turns out most people are pretty scared of you.”

“Fucking figures. And you’re telling me you’re not?”

“Of you? No.”

“You’re shitting me.”

“I’m not. I’m a little nervous maybe, but I’m not scared.”

That had made him pause. He’d swallowed, his mouth suddenly feeling like it was packed with cotton.

“Why’s that?” he’d finally asked you after a moment.

You had gone quiet, seemingly mulling over his question before you finally responded: “I think you have a lot to say. More than you already have, and more then what people think. To be honest, I want to hear it.”

He had laughed again, but this time it sounded forced, even to him.

“If you watched my broadcast then you know it all already.”

“Oh, trust me, I think the whole world saw your broadcast, not just Japan. No one would shut up about it for weeks. But I think there’s a lot more to you. I think a part of you wants to talk to someone else – none of that scripted bullshit – and I want to talk to you. Honestly, I think you’re pretty fascinating.”

He had been very tempted as ask you if you had a thing for villains, but he held off.

“You must be crazy if you find talking to me enjoyable. The other quacks can’t even stomach me, let alone stand to be in the same room as me for more than a few minutes. Just how fucked up are you really?”

You’d grinned and wiggled your eyebrows mischievously at him as you leaned back and spread your arms out along the back of the couch. “The only way you’re going to find that out is if you agree to talk to me. I don’t just give up all my secrets willingly you know.”

It was his turn to go quiet as he thought about your words over and over in his head, taunting him. He hadn’t been in any rush to leave the facility and go back to his old house, even if his mother and siblings were waiting for him. On the other hand, this was the most enjoyable conversation he’d had with anyone since coming to this white hellhole they called a hospital.

He figured maybe he would entertain you for a little while. If nothing else it would get you off his back.

You were lucky you were attractive.

The sound of your voice calling out his surname brought him back to the present.

“Mr. Todoroki?”

“… Fine.” He had finally relented. “We’ll see who you really are, and for fuck’s sake don’t call me that. I’m not my fucking father.”

“What do you want me to call you then?”

“D—” he stopped short. Was that his name any more? Did he get to call himself that after everything was said and done? It was the name he had given himself when Touya died all those years ago, but for some reason, saying it now just seemed wrong.

“…Touya.” He finally muttered. “Just Touya.”

You had smiled at him and for some stupid reason, it made his heartrate pick up. Just a little.

“Okay then. Touya it is. It’s nice to meet you.” You extended your left hand, and he had clumsily fumbled around for a moment before shaking your hand. As soon as your hands touched, and he felt the gentle pressure of your hand in his own, he was struck with the realization that this was the closest to human he’d felt in God knows how long. The other doctors that would come in and out of his cell treated him like he was some kind of feral animal, but you had extended your hand to him without any shred of fear or disgust. 

Once you’d both settled back into your respective couches, he’d shrugged.

“So, what now then?”

“Now we talk I guess.”

“About what?”

“I think that’s up to you. The people who brought me in here didn’t specify what we have to talk about, but I am supposed to tell you that I can’t talk to you about the UA students, politics, current or former hero’s, or the League.”

Fuck. It didn’t seem like he’d be getting any answers out of you regarding his former group either.

“…fine. Ask away, I guess.”

To his surprise, you shook your head. “Can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“Because if I’m the one doing all the asking, then we’re only going to talk about things from my perspective, which isn’t the point. The only way this is going to work is if you talk to me first.”

That’d had thrown him through a fucking loop. Ever since he had arrived at the ward, all the doctors had done is talk at him, hoping he’d respond eventually. You may not have been a doctor, but you made for a better conversation then any of them ever did.

“…Well… Where am I supposed to start?” he’d finally asked, feeling like an idiot. To his immense relief, you’d simply shrugged.

Wherever you want. From the beginning maybe? It might be easier that way.”

He remembered swallowing hard. “Alright… from the beginning then.”

He remembers pausing and looking up at you, taking you in. “What the hell is your name anyways?”

You told him with a smile, and that was how it started.

For the next year, you came to see him almost every day.

He was taken to the same room where you were always waiting for him without fail at the same time every day. Even though at that point, he’d rather choke than admit it; he began to look forward to your visits – finding that they gave him a reprieve from his mundane existence at the mental ward.

He knew the doctors were always listening and recording everything you talked about during the hour you were together, but he found he didn’t care as much as you managed to keep the meetings interesting.

True to your word, you wouldn’t talk to him about current political events, or any news related to heroes (he knew better then to ask anyways), but you were open to chatting with him about anything that he wished to talk about, even though conversations were often hard for him to start – but you were kind and patient with him, more so than anyone had ever been to him for the majority of his miserable life.

He found himself growing found of you, the little smiles you give him when he’d sit across from you, bringing a hidden grin to his own lips, though he was quick to push it down, never letting his passive façade drop for more the a few seconds, lest his supervising doctors notice and assume shit, as they tended to do.

You may not have been a licensed doctor, but you helped him more than any of the ones who worked at the medical ward did.

There was a gradual shift in your relationship as time passed. Around the six month mark he could feel it, and he was almost positive you could too.

Your conversations had become more fluid, more casual. You were relaxed as you could be around him, and he found himself opening up more and more to you without being prompted. Most times he liked to keep the conversation light, but every so often, he’d tell you bits and pieces about his childhood – before everything had gone to shit. He never bothered telling you about everything that happened after Sekoto; he didn’t want to tell you about the years he spent on the streets, or his time in All For One’s medical center with the other children turned Nomu’s, and to his immense relief, you never asked him to.

In return for his openness, you rewarded him with tidbits from your own life growing up. You didn’t name anyone specific (he couldn’t fault you on that one), but you’d tell him about your childhood and some of the adventures you’d had when you were young, well into your teen years.

He learned that you were born an only child to your parents, raised in a caring household. All the idealistic, quaint things that he had wished from his own family. He’d told you as much one day, prompting you to laugh softly.

“Not always.” You’d told him quietly. “I had my own pressure on me when I was growing up. My parents and I fought a lot. We rarely saw eye to eye – they didn’t agree with a lot of choices I made when I was younger, but it was okay aside from that.”

“Still sounds like your parents were better than mine.” He’d told you with a bitter smirk. “My dad’s an abusive asshole, and my mom—”

 It was then he realized that he struggled for words to properly describe her. Broken images from his fire fight with Endeavor had come back to him, and he remembered his mother’s fierce determination to try and cool him down – to save him – even as the heat was melting her flesh. She had thrown herself into the fray to try and stop him from ending it all without a second thought for her own safety. Up until very recently, he would’ve described his mother as weak and submissive, always bending to his father’s whims, even though he knew she didn’t have much of a choice back then, but now… that description didn’t seem to fit her anymore.

“—she used to be a doormat for dear old dad to walk over when I was a kid… but she’s changed. She’s a lot stronger than I remember her being.”

“I saw bits and pieces of your fight with… him.” You’d admitted quietly then. “I saw the aftermath. Your mom, your siblings… they all ran in to save you.”

He’d fallen quiet at that, not truly knowing what to say, but when he looked up again, you had offered him a gentle smile. “I’m sorry if this oversteps a boundary but… they never forgot about you Touya. Even if it felt like they did, they never stopped thinking about you.”

For once, he remembered being grateful that his tear ducts were permanently sealed shut, because he suddenly found himself in danger of crying. The tell-tale prickling behind his eyes caused his face to scrunch up as he pushed the thought of his mom and siblings down. He had quickly forced his expression to go back to neutral, and prayed that you hadn’t noticed the switch, but if you had, you didn’t comment on it – another thing he liked so much about you. 

Instead, you asked him something that caught him off guard.

“Have you seen them? Your family? Since you were placed here?”

“No. Didn’t think they were allowed to come here. Why?”

“I think… maybe you should let them come see you – your mom and siblings I mean. Not you know who. I don’t think you’d be doing yourself any favours.”

“Why?” He remembers pressing you. “Have you seen them?” You’d shook your head.

“No, I’ve never met them, but I think it might help if you sit down with them and actually talk to them one on one. You must be getting so bored just talking to me day in and day out.”

“No!” he remembers saying a little too quickly, causing another one of those knowing smirks to creep up your lips. “I—no, you’re fine. I like talking to you.”

“Do you not want to see them?” you had asked him seriously. “Is it too soon? I understand if you’re not ready. That’s a decision you have to make on your own. No one can make it for you.”

“… I’ll think about it.”

Because in truth: there were things he wanted to say to them, and conversations he wanted to have.

In the end, it was you who finally convinced him to let his family visit. They had been cleared to see him at the faculty a few months prior, but he had always declined a visit from them, not wanting to see them so soon, since the last time they were all together had resulted in him almost melting his mother, Fuyumi and Natsuo.

There had been strict rules set in place for his family’s visitations: only one person could see him at a time so he wouldn’t get overwhelmed. they weren’t allowed to talk about outside events with him, and finally, under no circumstance was Endeavor allowed anywhere near the faculty. He was fine with his mother and siblings coming to see him if they wished, but he didn’t want his father to be anywhere near him.

He wasn’t ready to see him again so soon. Even after his apologies. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever be ready to see his father again.

Thankfully the faculty had minimal difficulty honoring his last wish, as it seemed that Enji didn’t want to be around him either – or maybe he was purposefully keeping his distance. Either way, the old bastard wasn’t around him, and he figured it was for the best.

Once again you had been right; seeing his family again had been as cathartic as it had been terrifying.

There had been tears (from his family – he still was unable to cry), and there had been a lot of long, overdue heart-to-heart conversations with them of things that should’ve been said long ago.

It had been hard to sit down and listen to each of his family members without feeling the intense urge to get up and run when the guilt became almost unbearable, but he had forced himself to sit through it all for their sakes (and even his own), and soon he found himself scheduling more visits with his family, as well as seeing you for your daily interactions.  

You never prompted him to tell you how his now daily visits with his family went, but he’d told you anyways – not what was discussed, that would stay with him – but he had told you about his favourite visit. Hilariously, it had been with Shoto; something he never thought he’d ever say.

He’d told you about how Shoto had brought him lunch from the outside the day before. It wasn’t anything special; just piping hot udon noodles with vegetables in pork broth. They had sat down in silence and eaten together, sharing a meal for the first time in their lives. Nothing had been discussed, and yet everything had been said.

It had been nice. Comfortable, even.

He remembered telling you with a soft smile on his face, and you had pointed it out, causing him to scoff and wave you off.

“It’s better food then the shit they feed me in this prison. Seriously, that was the best meal I’ve had in a long time.”

“Well, once you’re cleared to leave, I’m sure you’ll be able to eat all the udon you want with your brother.” You’d told him as you tucked your feet under you. He’d shrugged, brushing you off, but you were ever observant, and had called him out on it.

“Do you not want to go back to them once you’re able to leave this place?”

It was a simple question in theory, but it wasn’t easy to answer.

He’d shrugged again. “Don’t really know if I can. Not after everything. I won’t go back if he’s there.”

“I don’t think they’d push so hard for you to come back to them if he was.” You reasoned with him gently. “Where would you want to go, if not there?”

You and your questions. Most of the time they were harmless, but sometimes they really made him think. Unfortunately, he hadn’t had an answer for you at that point, and you had quickly switched the conversation topic.

At that point, he’d be lying if he said he was thinking about what he’d do once he was released. Truth be told he hadn’t thought about it much at all. To him, it felt like he’d be in the psychiatric ward for the foreseeable future. He had no real plans for what he’d do once he was out. Maybe he would go back to his old house with his family, or maybe he’d try staking out on his own since that was what he was used to, if he was even allowed to go off on his own. He wasn’t sure what he’d be able to do once he was let out – but he certainly wouldn’t be free, he knew that much.

Maybe he’d try and reconnect with the League – assuming that any of them were even allowed to be released from custody.

It still bothered him on some level that he had no idea about what happened to them after the dust had settled. He had been carted off the battle field before any of them, after his attempt at going nuclear failed, and had been in and out of the hospital and the physiatrist wing ever since.

When he had first arrived, he’d asked the staff about what had happened to the remainder of the League, but they hadn’t told him anything aside from the fact they were alive – but he wasn’t sure how much of that he believed.

The only one he’d really trusted in the whole building was you. He knew you weren’t allowed to talk to him about any villains or heroes, but maybe if he asked you discreetly, you’d be able to tell him something more than what the medical staff had. He didn’t want you to get in trouble, but the curiously was eating away at him. 

Finally, one day he risked it, and asked you if you knew anything about the fates of his former teammates.

You had paused after he’d voiced his question, and went quiet for a moment, seemingly debating on what you could say to him. For a moment you looked like you were almost about to tell him that you couldn’t say anything, but the look on his face must have been desperate enough that you cracked.

You had given the cameras in the room an unreadable look before sighing loudly. “I don’t know where they are exactly. I never looked into it, and it isn’t public knowledge anyways.” You told him gently. “What I do know is that they’re alive, and they’re in different treatment centers receiving help. I know they were beaten badly and some of your friends almost died – but as far as I know, they’re doing okay.”

You’d then sat straight back up on your chair and loudly proclaimed, “I’m pretty sure I’m allowed to say that much to him, right? Don’t take it out on him or me once we’re done here.”

It wasn’t the answer he was hoping for, but at least they were alive, and were in similar situations to him. It made him feel slightly less alone.

When the timer beeped shrilly, signaling that your hour was up, you had stood up to leave just as you always did, but before you could say goodbye to him, he’d quickly lunged forward and grabbed your hand, incasing it with his large cold one.

You’d stared at him in shock, as he’d never made a move to touch you once in the six months, you’d been visiting him, but before any of the guards could rush in and pull him off, he’d let your hand drop, but not before muttering a quiet “thank you” under his breath to you, before backing off and allowing the armed guard to escort you out of the room.

He distinctly remembers feeling the pressure of your small hand in his own, but he hadn’t been able to feel anything else aside from that. He hated it. He suddenly found himself hating that all of the nerves in his body had been severed, rendering him unable to feel anything. He couldn’t feel the texture of your skin against his own, or if your hands were cool or warm like his.

He was forced to admit to himself that for the first time since he’d left the hospital; he wanted to feel something again.

He wanted to feel you. But he couldn’t, and it aggravated him more than anything.

There was another thing he remembered distinctly about that day as you were leaving him behind: For the first time since you had started your daily interactions with him; you had looked back.

You had looked at him like you were seeing him in a different light.

He didn’t see you for a few weeks after that. When he had been pulled from his cell, and into the room where you usually met him, he was instead greeted by several doctors that had overseen his treatment when he first arrived.

He had asked them where you were, and when they refused to answer his question, he had immediately become hostile and threatening. The walls that were slowly starting to lower since he first met you went straight back up, and Touya turned into Dabi once more.

For the first time in roughly seven months, he lashed out (quirk be damned), and was immediately taken back to his room and put on lockdown. He wasn’t allowed visitors, and the only times he was allowed to leave his cell was to go back to the same room with the same doctors who poked and prodded him – asking him increasingly invasive questions, until he shut his mouth and refused to speak to them once more. One last act of defiance on his end since he still didn’t have use of his quirk.

When it had become apparent to the doctors and specialists that he refused to speak to any of them, they stopped taking him out altogether. He spent countless hours staring out the tiny window in his room, basking in the weak sunlight and taking in the menial views he could see from his window.

He had wondered where you had gone; if you had been forcefully sent away after he had asked about the League. He hoped that wasn’t the case – he liked you, probably more then he should if he was honest with himself – and you were just about the only person he could actually carry on a conversation with in this shitty place.

A few more weeks in solitary had him about to snap. He had reached a point where he was about to try and strike a deal with the overseeing doctors about bringing you back if he answered their shitty questions, when one of the armed guards opened up his door and guested for him to follow.

Once again, he had been taken back to the same observation room, but to his pleasant surprise; you were there waiting for him.

You had beamed at him and before he could think about what he was doing, he had crossed the room towards you in three long strides until he was standing directly in front of you. He had begun to lift his hand up towards you, only for his action to halted by a curt bark from the guard who was still standing at the door. You had shaken your head, motioning to the guard you were fine and sent him on his way. As soon as the door had closed, he rounded on you.

“You left.”

You had nodded, a small, sad smile on your lips. “I did, yes. Not really by choice though.”

“Why did you go?”

You’d barked out a laugh. “I’ll be honest, the supervisors weren’t too happy with me when I told you about the League. I broke one of their rules, so they told me I had to go for a bit.”

He’d narrowed his eyes, confused. “But now you’re back.”

You’d given him a slight smirk. You turned to sit down on your usual spot on the couch, but this time, instead of having him sit across from you, you’d gestured for him to sit beside you, which he’d done so embarrassingly fast.

“You’re very stubborn.” You’d told him with a light laugh. “From what I was told, you refused to talk to anyone after I left – heard you got downright nasty with some of the staff, and they put you on probation. They called me a few days ago almost begging me to come back. Guess they felt you made the most progress when you were talking to me.”

You’d given him a look that was hard for him to read. “Why did you snap at them?”

He figured there was no point in lying to you – you’d find out somehow. “Didn’t know where you went. Fuckers wouldn’t tell me, and they kept prying into my shit. Didn’t want to talk to them so they put me in solitary.”

He remembers you looking sad at his answer. “I heard you were in there for several weeks. I’m sorry. I didn’t want that to happen to you. Not on my account. I didn’t… I don’t want to be the reason your release got delayed.”

For some reason, it bothered him that you blamed yourself for what happened, and he reached out to gently take hold of your wrist. To his surprise, you hadn’t stopped him, or made any move to pull your hand away from his, so he allowed himself to rub circles into the back of your hand with his thumb, even though he couldn’t feel it.

“Not your fault. Don’t worry about when I’m getting out. It’s not like it really matters anyways.”

“Do you know why they were pushing you so much?” you’d asked quietly, still not making any more to remove yourself from his hold. He’d shook his head and you’d simply leaned into him, damn near making him freeze up in surprise at your boldness.

“They told me that they’re planning on releasing you soon – with restrictions of course – but they were thinking that you’d be able to leave here sooner than expected. That was before your outburst, but if you’re willing to just hear them out and answer their questions, it’ll help speed up the process.”

“They seriously think that I’m fit to send out into society again?” he remembers scoffing, hardly believing what he was hearing. “Pretty sure the majority of them think I’m an irredeemable sociopath.”

“They’ve seen the way you act around me and your interactions with your family. You’re not perfect, but you’re trying, and sometimes that’s all you can do.”

“You do realize I have killed people, right? I’ve maimed countless others. They’re… not exactly wrong about me.”

Surprisingly, you’d simply rolled your eyes at his statement, acting like he’d just told you the sky was blue. “Of course I know that Touya. I’m not overlooking what you did. But they—your family – are fighting hard to try and get you another chance, a fresh start. They think you deserve it, and they’re out there right now, day and night, trying to convince others that you deserve a second chance too.”

You had twisted your hand in his so your palms were kissing, fingers laced together, and he could feel his heart pounding in his ears as you gave him that damn smile of yours.

“You’re right: the past never dies, but that doesn’t mean that it has to be your future as well.”

That simple statement had stunned him. For the first time in a long time, he hadn’t had anything to say in response to you.

He remembers fighting an internal battle in himself, trying to find something to say to rebuttal what you were telling him. A part of him understood why his family was fighting for his uncertain future outside the psychiatric ward, but on the other hand… he didn’t necessarily believe that he deserved it.

What kind of life would he be able to have even if he was allowed to be released? He had never planned on living this long, as morbid as that was. His original goal had been to go out in a fiery hell-blaze with his bastard of a father, but clearly that hadn’t happened. He was known a global terrorist, the right-hand to the symbol of fear. His quirk was legendary for all the wrong reasons. How could he possibly be allowed to live on the outside? There was no way the rest of Japan wanted him released, let alone wandering around. What kind of future could he possibly be allowed to dream about? Did he even dare to think about it? He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about what he might do if he was ever allowed out of the ward from time to time, but now that his impending release seemed like more of a possibility; he was starting to think maybe it was better for everyone – and maybe even himself – if he stayed locked away.

Thankfully, you and your perspective nature had picked up his internal struggle. You’d leaned into him and taken his hand in both of your own, allowing him to breathe again.

“What do you want Touya?”

What did he want? Christ he wasn’t sure.

“I… don’t know. Honestly: I never planned on living this long from the get go. Everything has always been decided for me. I kinda figured that this would be the same.” He had admitted quietly, the gentle pressure of your hands on his own, grounding his rapid thoughts.

“Do you think you’re ready to leave soon?” You’d asked him gently, prompting him to laugh, a bitter, ugly thing, but you hadn’t flinched.

“No.” he’d admitted after a moment, scrunching up his nose. “Dunno if there’s much of a point. I’ll never be free. No matter where I go, I’ll always be a prisoner. What kind of life could I even have outside of here? I don’t know how to live any other way aside from how I’ve been living since I escaped that damn—” he’d cut himself off last minute, reminding himself that you didn’t know about All For One’s hellish medical facility he had woken up in, and he had no plans on telling you about that.

“I just…” he remembered breathing out hard through his nose as he tried to collect his thoughts, focusing on the faint heat he swore he could feel emanating off your hands and leaching into his cold skin. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do if they decide to let me out. Dunno if I can go back to the old house after everything that happened, and I’m not sure if I could bring myself to live with my mom or my siblings after… well, you saw bits of what happened on TV already.”

He hadn’t needed to say it for you to know that he felt a tremendous amount of guilt towards his mother and siblings – especially Fuyumi and Natsuo – for nearly charring them in the heat of battle. He may have held onto so much resentment and anger towards his family for his mistreatment as a child, but he was also self-aware enough to know that it hadn’t been their faults, and they had tried to help him in the only ways they knew how.

You had been quiet as you let him vent to you. You hadn’t said anything for a while afterwards as you mulled over what he’d told you. Finally, you had nudged his shoulder with your own.

“I think that everything you just told me is proof enough that you deserve a chance to have a life outside of these walls.” You admitted. “What you said isn’t something an ‘irredeemable sociopath’ would say. That’s something a self-aware person says. You’re not perfect Touya, but Christ if you’re not trying. I can see it, your mom, sister and brothers see it, and I think a lot of your other doctors are starting to see it too. I think there’s a point, even if you don’t think there is.”

In that moment he’d been convinced that if he could cry, he would’ve been.

“Yeah? Well, thank you sweetheart.” He’d muttered into your hair, fighting hard with himself to try and keep his voice steady. “I have no fucking idea why you’re so nice to me, but it’s… yeah.”

“I think someone needs to treat you like a normal human being, because I don’t think anyone did for a long time.” You’d looked up at him pointedly, but he’d seen traces of something else in your eyes when you’d asked him, “Did they?”

A simple flat look from him had been answer enough for you, and prompted you to squeeze his hand. “Didn’t think so.”

You’d both lapsed into a comfortable silence aside from the steady ticking of the clock, and he’d known without looking up that your time with him was coming to an end. Now, he was dreading it more then he normally would’ve been. You’d spoken up again, but what came out of your mouth next, had shocked him.

“When you’re released… If you’re still unsure of where you want to go afterwards… I could… if you can clear it with the people overseeing your progress once you’re cleared to leave… Maybe… you could come stay with me.”

He remembered staring down at you, shocked. “Is that even allowed?”

You’d shrugged in response. “I’m not sure. I think you’re going to have to initially stay with your family for a while, but if you’re really having a difficult time staying there… maybe I could work something out with your family, as long as it’s approved. It’ll probably take a while, but I can try.”

He had a difficult time allowing what you were implying to sink in. How? How could you be so trusting? To even suggest the idea of someone like him staying with you? Forget if it was even possible or not, the fact you’d even offered in the first place was mind-blowing. Before he could think about what he was saying, he’d voiced his thoughts to you:

“I’m sure your parents would be thrilled, you bringing a villain back to your home.”

You’d simply given him a small smile. “I’m sure they wouldn’t like it… if they were around that is.”

“Oh. They not in the country, or—”

“We’ll go with that.”

Ah. Seemed like he wasn’t the only one with secrets. That was fair, you were allowed to have your own. He wouldn’t pry.

“Sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. You didn’t know.”

You’d both fallen back into the same silence from before. You were still leaning on him, his hand trapped in your smaller one, yet he’d made no move to remove it from your grasp. Honestly, he was shocked the guards from before hadn’t barged into the room and forced him away from you. The close proximity must have been violating a rule of some kind, and yet no one had made any move to separate the two of you, Maybe the medical staff really had been as desperate as you’d claimed, and were willing to let some things slide. Either way, he wasn’t complaining.

“You’re a lot colder than I thought you’d be… with your quirk being what it is and all.”

He’d glanced down at you, only to see you staring down at your intertwined hands. You’d squeezed the appendage again, prompting him to respond.

“It’s the quirk suppressors. Haven’t been able to use my quirk since before I got here. The quacks made it so I’m hopped up on suppressors around the clock, just in case. Turns out I’m pretty fucking cold without my flames. Must be from the ice side, but I can’t use that either.”

“Well, maybe if you keep being nice, you won’t have to be on them indefinitely.” You had tried to give him a hopeful smile, but he knew what the likelihood of that happening was, and you must have too, since you didn’t say anything else on the matter.

The timer had sounded then, signaling the visit was over. Before the guard could come to collect you, he’d quickly pulled his arm out of your grasp, and had wrapped it around you tightly, much to your initial surprise. He’d begrudgingly let you go so he could help you stand, sending the guard at the door a pointed look as he’d seen him casting an unsure look between himself and you. You hadn’t been the least bit bothered by the anxious glances the guard was trying to send you as you stood slowly and sent him one of your little smiles he’d come to expect from you.

“You’re coming back?” he’d blurted out before he could stop himself.

“I’ll see you tomorrow. Same time.” You’d told him confidently as you’d turned to leave, brushing your knuckles against his. “Don’t worry Touya. I’m not going anywhere.”

For the first time since someone had promised him anything in a very long time, he’d believed you.

In the end, you’d kept your promise.

It had taken close to another year before he was allowed to leave the psychiatric facility (some minor setbacks had pushed his initial release date back), but you had come to see him almost every day at the same time.

Over that time, you’d grown exceptionally close to each other, even more so from when you’d first started visiting him initially. It was almost impossible for him not to grow attached to you – you were his constant source of company, his companion. You were the one person he could tell anything to and not have to worry about being scrutinized for his thoughts. You were his safe space – something he’d never thought he’d ever say about someone else – and once he’d worked out how he saw you; it had been game over. He’d fallen for you fast and hard before he’d realized it, and by the time he did, it’d had been too late. He was hopelessly and utterly drawn to you, like a moth to a flame.

Surprisingly, you’d felt the same as him.

You’d openly admitted it to him one day near the end of his stay at the ward – even at the cost of possibly being prevented from seeing him again, since both of you knew you were crossing boundaries you hadn’t been meant to cross. He’d warned you as such, heart pounding in his ears at your confession, but you’d told him that he’d deserved to know with a simple shrug.

“Besides; if you keep up the good behavior and don’t have any more outbursts, you’ll be out before the end of the year anyways. Even if they don’t let me back after this – you can find me on the outside.” You’d told him matter-of-factly, boldly taking his hand in your own, before sending a shit-eating grin to the cameras set up around the room – knowing the doctors were monitoring every move.

He'd been certain that he could’ve kissed you right there and then.

Surprisingly, the medical staff had allowed you to continue coming back, even though it was apparent both of you cared for each other in ways that crossed professional boundaries. As much as the doctors were against how close the two of you had become, they couldn’t deny how far he had progressed since meeting you. He had gone from being the bitter, angry husk of a man, to someone who was still, and would always be forever scorned by the past, but overall, in a better place mentally.

Not too long after he’d sorted out his own feelings for you, he’d made you a surprising request:

He wanted you to meet his mother and siblings.

The meet up had taken almost a month of careful planning on the medical staff’s end, and had initially been met with some hesitation on both sides, but eventually you had agreed to it, and you’d sat down with him and the members of his family who he kept in contact with.

His father hadn’t been invited for obvious reasons.

The medical staff had allowed him out of his normal room so he could meet with you and his mother and siblings in one of the spacious sitting rooms normally reserved for guests. A row of floor to ceiling windows lined the far wall, allowing him to get a view of the outside gardens. He remembered the outside weather was slightly overcast that day but warm rays of sunshine would occasionally stream through the gray clouds, as you and his family slowly met with one another under his watchful gaze.

His mother had taken to you almost immediately, as well as Natsuo – both seemingly happy he’d bonded with someone who was relatively normal – Fuyumi and Shoto had taken a little more convincing. Shoto was more curious of you, while Fuyumi had been downright distrustful. She’d asked you right off the bat what your intensions were with him, but he’d seen right through her: she was concerned that you were somehow affiliated with the now disbanded League, or maybe even the Paranormal Liberation Front.

Thankfully, you weren’t so easily put off by her upfront questioning. You had been calm, almost amused, as you answered her questions; reassuring her that you were in no way affiliated with any criminal organizations, and how you were someone who’d been presented with an opportunity to help with his rehabilitation, and had taken a leap of faith when no one else would.

“Why though?” he remembered his sister pressing you. “Why would you want to help him even after knowing everything he’s done?”

You and him had shared a look then, and he’d known what you were thinking before you said anything.

“I guess I wanted to understand why things went so wrong.” You’d told her honestly, your shoulder brushing with his as you spoke. “I wanted to get his side of the story – the unscripted one. When the chance to talk to him in person came up, I took it. Everyone deserves to have their story told, and I wanted to hear his.”

“You’re a lot closer than just a support person to him.” Fuyumi had countered, making him bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from snapping at her to back off with her invasive questioning, knowing that he’d only land himself in trouble with the medical staff overseeing their visit if he had any outbursts.

To your credit, you’d simply shrugged, totally unbothered by her statement. “Yeah, well, that tends to happen when you see someone basically every day for over a year. Same time, same place. For as clueless as he is at normal relationships, your brother can be pretty charming when he wants to be.”

He’d been pretty sure the only reason you were outright lying to his sister was to try and make him look better in her eyes, but he almost hadn’t been able to stop the laugh that threatened to escape past his lips. Almost.

His sister had almost deflated then. Whether it was from disappointment in being unable to shake you, or relief, she’d simply nodded; finally accepting your answers.

“Well… if he’s happy… then that’s all any of us really need, I guess.”

The rest of the visitation had gone incredibly well, not that he was complaining. Plans for future meetings had been put in place, and from there, you and him had gotten into a semi-regular routine of seeing his mother and siblings, or whoever was available to come.

He never wanted to admit it to you, but the visitations you helped arrange with his family made his transition from the psychiatric hospital to his eventually moving into his mother’s new house after he’d been cleared for release, far smoother than he thought it would’ve been.

Eventually though, he was proven right about his earlier assumptions on living with his family – or rather – his mother and his siblings, again after so long:

He couldn’t do it. It felt almost wrong.

He’d felt like a ghost, wandering up and down the halls, looking at the pictures that lined the hallways of his mother’s house; comprised largely of his younger siblings. He’d watched as they had slowly grown up in each one, filling him with sense of melancholy.  

He’d missed the opportunity to watch them grow up. They’d done that without him. That was time he couldn’t get back – memories that weren’t there.

He’d felt isolated, and no amount of comfort or reassurance from his mother could change that deep-rooted feeling in him. Not even Natsuo’s constant presence in the home made him feel better, much to his younger brother’s disappointment, though thankfully he understood. 

He’d lasted two months before he’d finally cracked and called your number which you’d given him immediately after he was released. You’d both stayed in contact, texting every day (under strict monetization from police tech sectors), but you hadn’t been able to see him in person since he’d gotten out, as you’d both agreed that it would be better if he focused on trying to settle into his new home. He’d missed you terribly during that period – not used to not seeing you for such a long period of time.

He'd called you in the dead of night, and asked if your offer to have him come stay with you was still open. From there, you’d gotten in contact with the authorities in charge of his release to try and gain permission for him to come live with you, while he had the difficult task of trying to explain to his family why he couldn’t stay with them any longer than he’d already had.

As expected, you’d been met with resistance on both sides, but eventually his overseers had come to an agreement: he would be allowed to live with you, but he always had to have a tracking monitor on at all times, he had to be on constant quirk suppressors, he couldn’t leave your building without you and a Pro hero escort of some kind, and finally, he had to attend mandatory therapy sessions at least once a week, as well as call his probation officer weekly and give them updates about what he was doing. If he failed to meet any of the rules set out for him; he’d earn himself a one-way ticket to Tartarus, no questions asked.

As much as he’d wanted to argue some of what they wanted from him, he’d agreed to their stipulations, knowing full-well unless he agreed to their terms, he’d be stuck at his mother’s for the rest of his life, and while he didn’t hate living with her and his siblings, it was too awkward for him to try and face them every day, knowing his past atrocities towards the rest of the country and even them, would continue to haunt him for the rest of his days.

He couldn’t pretend that he was still the same person he was when he’d burned up at the tender age of thirteen. He was different, older, harder. Things would never be able to go back to what they’d once been, and honestly: he didn’t want them to. He couldn’t go back to living with them after such a long time apart, because he had no idea how to co-exist with them normally.

Thankfully, as much as he knew it hurt his mother to hear him express his innermost thoughts, she seemed to understand how he felt the most, and had simply told him that he was always welcome in her home, and she still wanted him to come stay with her from time to time.

“You’re my son Touya. No matter how old you get or no matter what you do, you’ll always be my baby.” She’d told him gently just before he’d left her house, wrapping him into a tight hug.

Sometimes he found himself grateful he couldn’t cry anymore. He’d just wished this side of his mother had been more prominent over ten years ago. Maybe things would’ve turned out differently if it had.

He’d seen you then for the first time in several months when you’d come to pick him up. He’d managed to keep himself calm while you spoke to his mother, but secretly he was elated to see you again after months apart. His excitement over seeing you again had probably shown on his face, since you’d made it a point to keep yourself close to him as his brothers had moved his important possessions into your car.

It was as you were talking to his mother; he’d learned that you had moved to a new apartment building some weeks ago, following the news that one of Japan’s former most wanted was coming to stay with you. Naturally, the people in your old building hadn’t been pleased, so you’d forced to switch buildings to an apartment located near several hero agencies, where the residents hadn’t been as concerned about an ex-super villain moving in, due to the multitude of patrolling heroes in the area. The change had been frustrating for you, but it was the only way he’d be able to stay with you without anyone kicking up too much of a fuss.

Eventually you’d both been on your way back to your apartment with Shoto in tow to help with moving his things into your apartment. Your new place wasn’t massive, but it had two bedrooms and a decently sized living room and kitchen. Shoto had helped him set his things up in the spare bedroom before departing, but not before giving you his number with instructions to call him if you ever needed help.

As soon as the door had shut, he’d been on you.

He’d slammed you up against the door, causing a started yelp to escape your lips, as he grinned down at you wolfishly.

“What’s the matter sweetheart? Nervous? It’s not like we haven’t been this close before.”

You’d turned beet red as you shyly traced your fingers up his chest. “No, but we certainly haven’t done this.”

He’d grinned as he dipped his head down so you and him were eye to eye. “Tell me no then. Tell me you don’t want this, that you don’t feel the same as me.”

He’d listened to your breath hitch, watching with delight as the flush deepened on your cheeks. “You wanted me to talk right? To be open with you about how I’m feeling? Well, I want you, and I think you want me too.”  

You’d looked up at him through your lashes, reaching up to lace your hand around his neck. “I do.” You’d told him gently, and your simple admission had made up his mind.

“Fuck.” He’d muttered, just before he’d dipped down and captured your lips with his.

The effect had been instantiations. His lips molded with yours, breathing in your air, as his hand cupped your cheek, long fingers curling around the back of your neck to keep you close to him.

You’d slowly peeled yourself off the door and grabbed at the collar of his shirt, pulling him with you further into the apartment, and into your bedroom. You’d managed to slam your door shut, just before he’d pushed you onto your bed – his lips never leaving yours as he pressed you further into the mattress.

He couldn’t keep his hands off you as you helped him take your clothes off. He could touch you, really touch you the way he’d wanted to for so long now. Nothing was there to hold him back, no cameras, no guards, no medical staff dictating his every move. It was just you and him.

He’d almost froze when he’d seen you’d laid out bare beneath him, soft and glowing against the pale sunshine streaming in from your bedroom window, warming your frame. You’d beamed up at him, tracing your hands up his arms.

“You can touch me.” You’d told him gently. “I trust you. Just be gentle.”

Gentle. Now that was a word he was certain he didn’t have in his vocabulary – but for you, he’d try.

He’d traced your curves gently, listening intently as your breath hitched, or how a small moan would escape past your lips when he touched a particularly sensitive area. Finally, you’d reached up to tug at the hem of his shirt, but he’d grabbed at your hands, making you pause.

“It’s not… I’m not… the scars… aren’t much better under there.” He’d tried to warn you. You’d given him a gentle smile, cupping his cheeks with your hands.

“I don’t mind Touya. You know I don’t care about all that.” You’d smoothed your thumbs over the raised skin of his face. “I love you for you. Regardless of what you look like.”

Love. You… you loved him, didn’t you? Even after everything he’d done while he was an active criminal – you’d somehow grown to love him, while most of the world hated him.

He didn’t necessarily think he was deserving of your love, but hell if he was ever going to point that out to you. He’d almost been tempted to ask you if you were a little bit crazy yourself, but you’d even told him when you had first met that he’d have to find that out for himself.

Maybe you were – just a little bit – but that suited him fine.

A normal girl would never have been able to handle him anyways.

He’d allowed you to help him out of his clothes then, and to your credit, you hadn’t batted an eye at the less than perfect skin covering his body. He may not have been held together by surgical staples anymore, and his body may not have been a mess of burnt patchwork skin like it used to be, but the new skin grafts were raised and patchy – never fully settling properly. It wasn’t often that he got self-conscience about how he looked, but you were different.

You had run your hands up and down the length of his body and marveled him like he was some work of art. He didn’t think he was, but you clearly saw him differently. You’d kissed his marred skin, and if he’d been able to cry, he would have.

You had pulled him down onto your bed and climbed on top of him, much to his surprise. He’d tried to prop himself up, only for you to gently push him back down onto your mattress, giving him a knowing smile all the while.

“Let me take care of you.” You’d whispered to him softly. “We’ll go slow. Gentle. It’s just me and you now.”

It wasn’t like he’d never fucked someone before, but it had been a while, and it was just that: he’d fucked, never loved. He wasn’t sure if he knew any other way when it came to sex, but he knew that he didn’t want to be rough with you like he’d been with his past flings, and so he had relinquished control to you.

He had allowed himself to relax into the mattress as you’d hovered above him, lining him up with your entrance. He was already painfully hard, his body reacting to yours as soon as he’d kissed you. You’d bent down to kiss his throat, relishing how he’d let out a shuddering breath as you’d sunk down onto him. He’d cursed as your tight heat had enveloped him, leaving him boneless and shaking.

He’d brought your face down to his to kiss you as you started moving, moaning as you slowly moved up and down on his shaft. You’d knocked the breath out of his lungs as you whimpered against his lips, still moving your hips against his own.

“Shit.” He’d growled as he’d reached up to wrap an arm around your hips. “Fuck baby. You feel so good. You’re so good for me.”

“You feel so good.” You’d sobbed. “I want you – want to make you feel good.”

“You do. Fuck you do. I want you. I need you.” He’d grunted as he planted his feet into your bed, pistoning his hips up into your body.

“Fuck.” You’d cried out, as you continued to bounce on his cock. “Touya!”

“I’m here. Fuck I’m here, with you. I love you.”

He’d remembered your eyes blowing wide at his confession, just before your body had stiffened up, and your mouth had opened up into a silent scream, as your orgasm had ripped through you – your end triggering his own.

You’d both stayed there for a moment, trying to regain your breath, before you’d slowly separated yourself from him. He hadn’t let you go far – pulling you down to lay beside him, and wrapping himself around you as you nestled into the broad expanse of his chest.

“Stay.” He had rasped as he held you close to him, curling around your smaller frame protectively. He’d known what he was saying was nonsensical – he was in your apartment, you weren’t going anywhere, not really – but thankfully, you seemed to understand what he was trying to say without him outright telling you. “Don’t go.”

“I’m not going anywhere Touya.” You’d breathed, placing a kiss on the side of his temple. “You’re home now. With me.”

That simple sentence had brought him more comfort than he’d experienced in recent memory. He’d passed out sometime after with you still nude and curled into him, sharing in his warmth.

That had been the best sleep he’d had in years.

After that, he’d fallen into a steady routine of normalcy with you. You’d go to work, while he’d keep himself entertained during the day. Normally, he’d open up the windows in your living room and perch himself on the couch near them, soaking up the feeling of gentle sunbeams on his face, and watching the outside world go by as he waited for you to return later in the evening. You had set up therapy appointments for him every Thursday, and either you or Shoto would take him depending on your schedules. Life settled down, and the outside world continued on around him, even though his world now consisted of your apartment and what he could see outside from your windows.

It wasn’t a coincidence that three pro heroes moved into the building roughly a month after he had moved the last of his menial things into your apartment.

He couldn’t say that he was surprised by the less then subtle way the newly reformed hero commission chose to keep an annoyingly close watch on him, but he was still allowed some freedoms with you, so he figured he could keep his jabs to himself for the time being. 

All and all, life with you was simple easy. For the first time in his life, he could say he was appreciating the little things he never could’ve before his life had turned into a living hell.

For the first time in a very long time, he had hope – something he’d never allowed himself to have before, because what had been the point? He had fully planned on taking himself out in the final fight against Endeavor… but life was strange, and it turned out that it had different plans for him.

While he couldn’t be sure what those plans were yet, they had brought you to him, and that was enough.

He had you, and in the end, that’s all that really mattered—

-----

The sound of one of his skin care products hitting the floor snaps him out of his reprieve. He blinks, and once again, he is standing in your bathroom with the sink running, halfway through the skin maintenance routine that you forced on him once he came to live with you. 

He swears under his breath as he bends down to retrieve the plastic tube with his right arm, only to freeze as he suddenly remembers:

His right arm is gone. He tore it clean off in the brawl against his dad.

He finds it surprising how often he forgets he doesn’t have both his hands anymore. Half the time he swears that his right arm is still intact because he can feel the damn thing, only to look down and see it’s still gone from mid bicep down. You once called it a ‘phantom limb’ and he thinks you might be onto something with how often he’ll go to do something with his right, only to remind himself the arm doesn’t exist anymore.

It doesn’t bother him as much as he thought it would. Natsuo had offered to set him up an appointment to get him fitted for a prosthetic, but he hadn’t made up his mind on it yet – finding most things pretty manageable even with the lack of his right arm – but he does have days where he wishes he had all of his limbs, and there are certain tasks were having two hands would be more useful than one.

His extensive skin care routine is one of those tasks.

Hilariously, it was one of the conditions of him coming to stay with you initially: for the first time in his life, he was being forced to look after himself.

He had protested initially when you had come back home one day with a plethora of different specialty products for sensitive skin – not seeing the point – but you had insisted that he use them to take care of the newer skin grafts, telling him that if he wanted to continue to stay with you, he’d have to start properly taking care of himself, or you would do it for him.

He had begrudgingly accepted, and he gradually incorporated it into his daily routine. Realistically, he knew he didn’t have much to complain about: he didn’t have many responsibilities as it was, and you had promised him if he kept up with it, you wouldn’t tell his parole officer that you weren’t forcing him take his quirk suppressor medication – one of the conditions of his release.

He grins inwardly to himself as he turns the sink off and pats his face dry. You hadn’t seen the need to enforce that particular rule, seeing how you were quite confident he wasn’t going to burn down your apartment building, and he didn’t have any plans to – lest he be forced to return back to his mother’s home.

Besides, after spending over a year feeling unnaturally cold without his quirk, he was in no rush to return to the weak, powerless state the psychiatric ward had left him in. Even if he couldn’t use his quirk to it’s full, destructive potential like he used to, just knowing that he still had use of his quirk intact was a comfort to him.

He makes his way out of the bathroom, flicking the light off behind him and, pads over to his side of your shared closet, stripping out of his sleep clothes and pulling on a loose shirt and baggy sweats, before heading out into the small living room.

If his younger self could see how he lives now, he’s sure he would’ve turned his nose up in disgust before calling him a sell-out, and a gnarled part of him still thinks that to some level, however; when he thinks back to how he used to live on the streets for close to a decade, he’ll take the easy, comfy life-style you allow him to live in your home in a heart-beat.

He used to wonder about where he would get his next meal – now his biggest inconvenience is that he’s bored whenever you’re not at home. How the times change.

He turns on the T.V. and sets it to a low volume as he moves into the kitchen and opens the fridge, pulling out a few miscellaneous items and setting them on the counter, before getting to work on prepping the food.

He doesn’t eat much, even now his metabolism is still messed up from the years of cumulative damage his body sustained, but he found himself making food for you when he first moved into your apartment as a way to keep himself occupied while you were at work. Most of his cooking attempts consist of cup noodles, and whatever else was easy to make, but every once in a while, he’d put a bit more effort into what he made, so long as you had the ingredients for it.

He curses to himself as he painstakingly prepares an easy meal of miso soup and yaki, his lack of a right arm slowing down his progress. Eventually he finishes his meal prep and puts his creation away as he waits for you to come home, moving to his usual spot by the window on your living room couch, before sitting down and indulging in some mindless reality T.V. show.

He watches the show absentmindedly, barely paying attention to what’s playing on the screen as he basks in the warm sunlight streaming in from outside. He glances over to his left to see his reflection staring back at him from a hanging mirror across the room, and has to fight the urge to flinch at what’s staring back at him.

Even after all of the love and tenderness you allowed him to experience while living with you, he still looked rough, and there were days where he felt it more than others. He may not have been able to feel pain in the normal sense, but his body aches constantly and there are additional issues he deals with daily. 

He’s painfully aware that he probably doesn’t have a lot of time on the earth. He’s in his late twenties, too damn early to be faced with his own mortality, but he knows there’s no use in trying to dance around the subject. With his body being what it is, he’d be surprised if he made it to fifty, but he knows better than to voice that out loud. The one-time he had confessed his inner thoughts to you, you had damn near burst into tears, and he found that he couldn’t stand to see you like that, so he keeps his morbid thoughts to himself.

The sound of the apartment door opening snaps him out of his depressing reprieve. He looks up, only to see you closing the door to the apartment, hanging your keys up and kicking your shoes off.  He gets up off the couch and pads over to you, greeting you with a little smile.

“You’re home early.”

You turn around to face him, smiling. “Yeah, I finished early today. Figured I’d come back and see what you were up to.”

He snorts as he takes your bag from you, setting it down on the small bench you had set up near your front door. “Not much, you know that. S’not like I can leave the building without you or Shoto escorting me.”

You roll your eyes, gracing him with a teasing smile. “How is he anyways? You talked to your family at all recently?”

He shrugs. “Not really. You know my phone usage is heavily monitored anyways.”

“I told them that – your mom reached out to me recently – she was hoping to meet up with you for lunch soon, and she hadn’t heard from you in a bit.”

“Ah. I don’t look at my phone very often. Tell her that I’m down. I’ll reach out at some point.” He nods towards the kitchen. “I made dinner.”

You beam at him. “You didn’t have to do that.” You lean in to press a kiss to the rough skin of his cheek, and he feels his heart speed up in his chest. Even though the physical affection you gave him isn’t anything new, it’s still amazing how much of an effect you had on him.

The fire that he keeps buried in his chest flares to life as you turned away from him briefly, but he doesn’t let you go far. He snakes an arm around your middle, pulling you back to him, causing you to look up at him.

“I’ve missed you.” He mumbles quietly into your hair. You simply wrap your arms around his torso and snuggle into his chest.

“Missed you too.” You tell him quietly. He swallowed thickly, as he allowed his hand to splay further down your back.

“I really missed you; I mean.”

You smile up at him gently, wiggling your eyebrows. “Did you now?”

“Mmmm.”

His hummed response causes your grin to grow wider. “Wanna show me?”

He doesn’t humor you with a response – instead opting to take you by the hand and lead you towards your shared bedroom with teasing grin of his own. He allows you to kick the door closed behind you, before dipping down to bite on the skin of your neck, causing a giggle to escape your lips as his hands wander up and down your frame.

“Off.” He grunts, tugging on your clothes. You smirk at his demand, pulling at the hairs at the nape of his neck to get him to look at you.

“I think you could ask me a bit nicer, right?”

He rolls his eyes at you. “Please.”

“That’s better.” You smile sweetly at him, separating yourself from him long enough to shimmy out of your pants and strip out of your shirt, leaving you in your bra and panties before him.

He kisses the back of his teeth as he closes the distance between you, wrapping a muscular arm around you as he captures your lips with his rough ones. He feels you sigh into the kiss as you wrap your arms around his neck.

It wasn’t often that he initiated physical contact like this – he not shy by any means, but he’s not used to having such close relations with another person. He’d been a loner for such a long time after escaping the hospital, and any physical contact he somehow managed to receive from woman he’d met in sketchy bars during those miserable years had never been meaningful or fulfilling. He wasn’t used to being wanted.

But you wanted him, and you weren’t shy about letting him know just that.

He had no problems letting you remind him of the latter.

He feels your hands travel down from around his neck to the bottom of his shirt, tugging on it. “Off please.” You murmur against his lips, and he separates from you long enough to yank his shirt off, before coming back to embrace your soft body with his own hot one.

He presses you back against the bed, gently pushing you down to lay on the mattress as he hovered above you. He dips back down to seal his lips with yours, as he feels your fingertips trail down the rough skin of his stomach until they reached the waistband of his sweats. He smirks as he feels you undo the drawstrings and push them down his slender hips, pushing them down low enough for his cock to spring free.

“Seems like you’re just as eager as me.” He sniggers as he sits up long enough to shuck them off, giving you a moment to unhook your bra and toss it across the room.

You don’t humor him with a response as you sit up to stroke his cock, causing him to hiss as your fingers wrap around his shaft. He lets you have your way for a moment before gently pushing you back down onto the mattress, causing you to look up at him quizzically as he shakes his head.

“Not today babe, let me do the work.”

He feels his heart pound in his ribcage, as a look of realization passes over your pretty features. A smile pulls at your lips as you open your arms and beckons him down to you, which he eagerly accepts. He nips and kisses the skin of your neck as he makes quick work of your panties, causing you to moan softly as he runs his fingers up the length of your dripping slit.

“God.” He groans as he attacks your lips again. “So, fucking wet for me. You want me, right?”

“Yes Touya.” You breathe against his lips, allowing your fingers to trace patterns into the scarred expanse of his back. “Always. Always you.”

He feels his destroyed tear ducts sting slightly at the sincerity of your confession. Even though you’ve assured him you only want him countless times before, it was something he never quite got used to hearing.

The entirety of his life before you was spent in fire and hardship. Kindness was something foreign to him, and being allowed to be vulnerable with another person was something he never even considered. He never thought he’d live long enough to be able to do so regardless – accepting that he destined to spend what was left of his life alone – and so the thought had never crossed his mind.

But he wasn’t alone. Not anymore. Not since you had unexpectedly come into his life.

He had you. Body, mind and soul, he belonged to you. He knew there was no way he would ever have the words to tell you that, so he hoped that he could convey his message clearly enough by showing you just how much you meant to him.

He taps your leg, getting you to wrap your legs around his lean waist, as he lines himself up with your opening. You thread your fingers through his soft white spikes as he slowly begins to push himself into your pussy, causing you to whimper as he begins to stretch your walls out.

“Fuck, you’re tight.” He growls as he bullies his way into your tight heat. “You’re perfect for me. Just you – you’re the only one I want.”

“Me too.” You gasp as you dig your nails into his shoulder to ground yourself. “I’m so glad I got to meet you. S-so glad you’re here with me—”

Your eyes open impossibly, as he suddenly snaps his hips forward and drives himself home deep inside your walls, causing you both to moan. He barely gives you any time to recover before he starts moving. He fists his hand in the sheets beside your head as he focuses his energy into keeping his thrusts deep and strong, just how he knows you like it.

He grins down at you almost sadistically, watching as your eyes roll back from the force of his thrusts. “S’matter? Don’t tell me you’re giving up already?”

“N-no.” you moan as he gives you a particularly hard thrust. “I just—oh, fuck!” you wail as you feel him hit a practically sensitive spot inside you, causing him to grin wickedly.

“Eyes on me gorgeous.”

“You’re mean.” You huff, but center your attention on him regardless, causing him to chuckle, and reward you with another harsh thrust.

“I know.” He practically purrs as he shifts his weight to his knees. He grabs the meat of your hip, and starts pounding you harder than before, making you keen and fist your hands into the sheets as his pelvis brushes up against your clit deliciously.

“Fuck, Touya! I’m gonna—I’m gonna cum!” you cry out, warning him of your impending release, but it only makes him double down and fuck you harder, determined to see you climax before him.

“Yeah? Well, go ahead sweetheart: come on this cock. C’mon, c’mon; I know you’re going to, I can feel you squeezing me just right, so do it. Let go for me pretty girl, just let go.”

He feels your walls convulse around him and your back arches slightly off the bed as you climax with a desperate cry at his words. The sight of you coming undone beneath him is so hot it does him in a few strokes later, spilling deep inside your walls with a feral growl of his own.

You both stay like that for a few minutes, fighting to catch your breaths, before you unlock your legs from around his waist, allowing him to pull out of you. He pulls back to grin at the combination of your fluids that leak out from in between your legs, and you roll your eyes. He makes a move to the bathroom to grab you a towel, only for you to shake your head.

“Later.” You murmur, as you pat the spot on the bed next to you. “Come lie with me for a few minutes.”

He laughs quietly at your antics, but obliges your request, and climbs over you to collapse into the vacant space on the bed next to you, and you don’t hesitate to move over to him. 

“God, you can be relentless sometimes.” You pant as you curl up into his side. He simply snorts at your assessment as he drapes his arm around you protectively.

“Maybe. I am a villain after all sweetheart.”

“You were.” You manage to grumble as you make yourself comfortable, eventually settling on resting your head on his chest so you can hear his heartbeat. “You’re not now.”

“Yeah, well. Attitude never changed. Surprised you put up with me for as long as you did.”

“You weren’t so bad.” You murmur softly, tracing shapes into the rough skin of his stomach. “If I thought you were, I wouldn’t have come back after we first met.”

“Why did you come back after the first time anyways? I can’t remember if you ever told me.” He suddenly raises his head so he’s looking at you. You meet his blazing turquoise irises with a calm gaze of your own and wink at him teasingly.

“I’m crazy remember?”

“Must be, if you came to see one of Japan’s most wanted almost every day for damn near two years straight. But seriously, why?”

You’re quiet for a moment before you answer him. When you do, you shift your head slightly on his chest so you can see his face better.

“I suppose it’s because all your rage… all your anger towards the injustice of everything you’d gone through up until that point… it reminded me of myself, in a way.” You admit softly, causing him to quirk a snowy brow at your confession.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about all the things you said on your initial broadcast—" you continue on before he can ask. “—like how there were a lot of shitty things about hero society you weren’t wrong about. Honestly, for a long time there, I felt just as pissed off with some of those so-called “Pro’s” as you. Some of them were only doing it for the money and fame, you could tell.” You exhale through your nose.

“But, on the other hand, there were so many good things happening to change those problems that you didn’t see because you were on the outsider.” You fall silent for a moment before adding:

“You just seemed so hurt, so raw with everything you were saying. I told myself there and then, if I ever got the opportunity to meet you, I’d show you not everything is as bad as it seemed. Never thought I’d get the chance honestly, and yet, one day, the opportunity to meet you face to face practically dropped into my lap. How could I not take the offer?”

“Was I what you’d thought I’d be?” he finds himself asking you, not completely sure if he wants to know the answer. You simply send him one of your glowing smiles that sends tingles down to his stomach.

“No, you were better.”

He snorts, shifting his arm so he’s tracing his warm fingertips up and down your nude body. “You don’t have to lie to me.”

“I’m serious. Even now, you’re doing so much better with handling everything then I thought you would. You’re resilient, and you adapt when you need to, but you’ve definitely changed… in a good way. You’re not as hateful anymore… you’re calmer, more accepting.”

“Yeah well, the shrinks have you to thank for that. Far as I’m concerned, they don’t do anything. I just see them so I can stay with you.” He grumbles, prompting you to giggle, before shifting you so you’re lying on your sides, facing each other.

He tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear, inwardly softening as he watches you lean into his warm touch, before dropping his hand back down in between your bodies.

“I know I’m not very good at these sorts of things, but… you know I love you, right?”

He’s hopeful that you understand. He doesn’t say it often to you, and he knows he probably should, but even after all the time he’s spent with you, that involves you showing him what a healthy relationship looks like, it’s still not an easy thing for him to say. Hell, he has a hard enough time saying it to his own mother, let alone anyone else.

He’ll probably always have a difficult time admitting it. Love is an emotion he’s never had a good understanding of, seeing how it was so sked for him a s a child. Even now, the concept is a foreign one for him to understand, but thankfully, you seem to be more aware of this than anyone else.

You find his hand with one of your own and lace your fingers together, squeezing it tightly.

“I know Touya. I’ve always known.”

FIN

[phantasmiac]

au where reader is the typical civilian housing and feeding dabi like a stray cat in most fics but in this au the phoenix quirk theory is canon and dabi “dies” but not really because he’s annoying and refuses to give the reader peace. continued here and here.

tw/cw: spoilers for people who haven’t read chapter 290, no pronouns or gender mentioned, mental health, i am writing this at 4 am i swear this imagine is better in my head

wc: 1.3k

the battle between dabi and shouto ends with a pile of ashes. in the end, shouto couldn’t save his brother. touya realized he was in over his head, that his plans for revenge would always be a manic fantasy; but he’d sooner die than let his little brother come out as a hero. so as his final act, his flames burn the hottest they had since that day up on that mountain, and where he once stood lies a pile of ashes.

shouto is heartbroken and (ironically) defeated, but the war gives him no time to grieve. his friends are still struggling to fight their separate battles, and he doesn’t need any more deaths on his hands. the battlefield is cleared. dabi is dead. most of the public is thrilled; one less psychopath terrorizing the country.

what no one knows is that dabi touya, on a now abandoned battlefield, has somehow found himself butt ass naked, alive and in tact, no staples necessary. suddenly he’s 16 and woken up in a hospital bed again, confused and shaken. but this time, he has some idea of where he is and what just happened. after trying to process everything and putting pieces together, he makes a run for it.

you, on the other hand, find out about his death on the news a day later, and it breaks you. the last time you saw touya he’d been cruel. crueler than usual, insults more vile than in any other argument you’d ever had about him not needing you. he tore you apart like you were the most insignificant thing in the world. you knew he didn’t mean any of it, that he still believed you were in anyway buying his bullshit nonchalant persona. and you know he wanted to make you hate him, and you’d be a little silly to give into it. but he the things he spewed at you were awful, almost unforgivable.

almost. you still felt like someone had tore your heart from your chest when you heard the news. became nauseous at the realization that you would never see your pathetic excuse of a love ever again. for weeks you grieved, numb and lifeless, as if you had died with him. a part of you had, you realized, and it scared you. it scared you how much you needed him, and how he still managed to dictate the state of your being even in death. it wasn’t healthy. so in an impulsive and maybe even manic decision, you ran.

you crossed borders to escape the memories of him. you work to build yourself back up in a new place. you get a new place, a new job, start socializing, put your time and energy into hobbies and volunteer work. you haven’t completely gotten over him. you have the occasional one night stands, go on a few set up dates for the hell of it. you’re not ready yet. but things are looking bright and you know that eventually, you will be.

what you don’t know is that in the country you’d abandoned, touya has been trying to get used to the feeling of anonymity, while still maintaining his cautious nature. after weeks of roaming the streets, he’d gone back to your apartment, ready to renounce his goals, beg for your forgiveness, and commit himself to you, only to find nothing. not a single trace of you or the time he had spent there.

and so began his new goal: to find you. when everything finally began to settle, he reached out to as many people as he could. sketchy but useful people he’d met over the years, under a new guise; people who could help him find the route back to you. over the course of the year, he began getting warmer and warmer. and eventually, he found you.

at first, he watched you from a distance, observing the patterns of your new life, waiting for the right time to approach you. there were no signs that you had moved on romantically. he knew it was twisted and cruel to take pride in the fact, but he relished in it anyway (had someone been in the picture, he would have backed away. with the greatest reluctance of his life, but he would have, for you).

and then one day, he decided it was time. in his usual fashion, he invited himself into your home in accordance to your schedule (when he decided to look for you, he vowed to leave the crime behind, but these were special circumstances!). and as he waited, he looked through the life you had built within the walls of the building, without him. he knew that looking for you was selfish, but now, standing here, he became more aware of the fact than ever.

you come home and immediately feel something is off. years of a certain unexpected visitor has trained you to recognize even the slightest signs of a presence in your home. you hear a floorboard slightly creak, and immediately reach for the nearest heavy object, which just has to be the laptop sitting on the coffee table in the living room. you choose life over the laptop, and slowly approach the turn of the hallway.

another creak. you hold your breath. in the back of your mind, you wish whoever was breaking into your home was someone familiar. a stupid thought to have, especially now when your laptop is the only thing protecting you from an imminent death, and it isn’t even all that sturdy.

you don’t think for another second when a dark figure becomes more apparent in the corner of your eye, and you swat directly at it. the figure falls to the ground, and you wait to express any gratitude to the universe for later, choosing to continue your assault while the burglar is still down, still with your laptop (somehow still in tact) as if he were a pesky fly on the wall.

the person lets out oofs and grunts before they’ve had enough, managing to get out an it’s me

and your stomach flips, because for a second he sounded identical to him. you think you must not be getting as better as you thought you were, seeing as you’re mourning touya to the point of delusions in the middle of a break in. maybe you need to up the therapy sessions.

you push those thoughts aside and put a foot up to the persons chest before stopping your attack in order to give them a proper look. this time, your heart stops. because the voice was one thing, and wow what are the odds that this guy has white hair? but now you’ve looked into his eyes and those blue orbs are unmistakable. you’ve looked into them countless times, whether it be with love, hate, sadness, and everything in between. you’ve pleaded with those eyes over and over again and you’ve seen them in your dreams, a haunt that you haven’t been able to shake off.

“touya?” you manage to croak out. the tightening of your throat might actually kill you. you blink your tears away a few times, just to make sure that what you’re seeing doesn’t disappear and reveal some hallucination that you’re having. “is it…. is it actually you?”

he’s looking back at you, a softness and… hesitance in his gaze. he seems afraid. an emotion you’ve only seen from him during times where he would tremble in your arms. he would never explain the reason for his sudden panic, but you could tell always tell he was reliving something. but this was different. this was real time fear. fear of rejection.

after a moment of silence, he gave a slow nod.

“yeah. it’s me.”

and with that, everything you worked for meant nothing. you are back to square one, hopelessly and pathetically in love with touya.

[dazaiandhislovelybandages]

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒊𝒇 𝑰 𝒂𝒎 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒈𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒏 {𝑫𝒂𝒃𝒊}

A/n: honestly Touya has a hold on me and he is not even my comfort character

Warnings: Well, the reader is a villain so we have some questionable morals here and there..., mentions of scars such as burn marks, slight mention of sh so be careful, I think that's that

Pairing: Touya x villain!reader

News that the missing Todoroki son had been alive all this time were everywhere by that point.

And you weren't meant to be there. Hell, if you hadn't seen the broadcast, you wouldn't even have wanted to go there.

Since you were living in hiding in Japan's underworld, you hadn't really kept in touch with the villains you once used to talk to. However, everyone was talking about a then new organisation, the League of Villains. In a strange turns of events one of the members, q villain going by the name Dabi, had gained your attention.

While everyone was mostly focused on his gruesome appearance when talking about him, you were more interested in the theories they had about his past. At first nothing really made sense, some people were saying that he was born that way -half of his face and most of his body burnt-, others were saying that he had caused them himself and the theories went on.

You knew better, behind every lie there is truth.

Occasionally you would go out just to see how things were going and whenever you felt like it, you would cause chaos and then disappear again. That was how you and him met.

It was just a random night and you had decided it was about time you went out for a walk. With just one word you became invisible and went on with your night, admiring the beautiful empty night sky. After some time you reached a gas station and were met with two options: either pass by it or walk to the alleyway behind it. Since you had been using our quirk for quite a while, you decided to undo the spell, choosing the second option.

But of course someone had to be there and see you. You hadn't seen him at first but turned your head to the left as soon as you picked up his presence, ready to use your ability on him and cast a spell to wipe his memory -your face was on many wanted posters in the town and the bounty was a bit too high to risk getting caught.

"Feisty." You heard him whisper to himself, chuckling.

"Got a problem?"

And that was how it all started. You found out you and Dabi were the same age, had a similar personality and even though you acted as if you hated each other, you were kind fond of him. At first you would only meet 'accidentally' once a week. Not once had it been accidental, Dabi was keeping a close eye on you and vise versa, though both of you acted unaware of it. Then once became twice and as time went on, he would spend most nights at your place.

"The League's house is filthy." He would say even when the League became the Paranormal Liberation Front and consequently had moved into a way bigger house.

You ended up knowing everything about each other. How his real name was Touya Todoroki, his past, his plan... oh his plan. If dedication had a human's face it would be his. Many people had wronged you as well, your family included, but not once had you thought of plotting such a grand plan to take revenge on them, no you had just... hurt them the way they had hurt you.

And of course you told him everything about yourself: how you became a villain because you thought the heroes were corrupted, how your family had abandoned you because of your quirk.

Talking about your quirk, he was fascinated by it and as you later figured out, Touya was rarely fascinated by something. But he loved your quirk. With just one word you could have the most lavished meal in front of you or teleport yourself to another room. What he loved the most, however, were the 'spells' you would use to defend yourself. It would only take one word to raise a shield around yourself, knock your opponent out and all things like that.

But as days passed and the League was preparing for the war with the heroes, Touya and you would not meet as often as you once did. When you saw the broadcast that day excitement and adrenaline filled your veins. You wanted to be there, you wanted to see his grand plan coming to life. And so you did.

You hadn't meant to interrupt anything, infact, you weren't even aware that despite everything going down Touya's eyes were on you. The heroes were so tired that they barely noticed that you weren't a member of the league.

While Touya's attention was split into two: his father and younger brother and you, your attention was mostly on him and what he was saying. With the corner of your eye you caught one of the heroes' quirks coming towards you and you whispered the worlds 'shield'. Even though no one could see it, an invisible wall had taken its place around you, shielding you from the heroes. But Touya had been quicker. A circle of blue flames appeared around you.

Letting out a slow chuckle you lifted your head and looked at Touya on top of Machia. In a matter of seconds you were on his side. You heard a boy with green hair whispering your name.

"You were in jail!" He shouted in disbelief.

"Is that what they told you?" You tried your best to contain your laughter. Your eyes travelled from the shocked faces of the boy and Touya's family to the white haired man. The smell of fire and bleach almost made you throw up. "Consider this a small commercial break." Your attention turned to the hero who had almost used their quirk on you. "I don't like interruptions."

With a snap of your fingers you were in front of him and the fight continued.

On a second thought you had no idea why you were participating in this when you could have just stayed hidden and watched. Be it the excitement and the adrenaline? Maybe the fact that you hadn't been in a fight of such scale since forever? You didn't know but you were left satisfied when the fight ended.

~

The sound of the door opening almost went unnoticed. You already knew who it was. He opened the balcony door and sat on the metal chair, the only thing between the two of you the round table.

"I ruined it. I am sorry."

"You've never said you're sorry before."

"Because I never had to."

"I had finished my plan long before your interruption, doll."

Slowly you let the back of your head touch the wall behind you and you looked at Touya. Despite his calm demeanor and the satisfaction in his eyes you could still sense his adrenaline. Your gaze remained fixed on his half naked body and when you finally made sure that he would be looking at the starlit sky for a while you turned your head as well.

Next thing you knew he was standing before you, his partly burnt hands gripping on the metal arms of the chair. White haired suited him better than black.

"You're making a mistake." You told him.

"Don't you think I know?"

"Go on, kiss me, I will forgive you."

The taste of a vow the two of you had made back then to not get romantically involved with each other was bitter.

"Forgive me or not I don't care."

[savrenim]

This is the second time I've found somebody who got into the mha fandom from Nov 5 within two days of each other, except yours is a reverse reaction XD That OP was someone who understood all the memes EXCEPT "what is a dabi and why is he touya" when Nov 5th first had Dabi trend above the election and all that happened, the rest of us were dying to know the confusion it caused to the non-mha fans and the poor twitter headline writer who had to wonder why a burnt anime boy was trending that day.

hello anon thank you for making my day other five asks below the cut bc this became a Long Post (ur right it's more.... I try to be as considerate as possible to other people on my dash so I've gotten into the habit of readmores for long posts?)

(2) So thank you for sharing your story, even in the form of an insane chunk of tags lol. Some fics updated before canon reveal actually contain crumbs of canon too just because the author goes back and edits it in, usually names since they can't change the entire fic of course. This is the case for Hawks's name, we used to call him "Takahiro Sora(ta)" after a fic first kickstarted the name. But shortened it because birb + sky. And hawk + word that sounds like "hero"

(3) In Dabi's case, it was whatever name related to spring or autumn the author could find, I've seen Haruka used once. (Because the Todoroki sibs are named after seasons, Touya and Shouto are too but vaguely and I forgot which is which.) Their tags are HUGE and I've read so many fics these past 4-5 years, I'll have to get back to you later because not only do I have so many deadlines, but also have to look through them all again 😭 Once you have canon sorted out, do u wanna hear fandom stories?

(4) You really had to go and choose the only two mha characters (Dabi and Hawks, Aizawa is fine) who caused an absolute RIOT in fandom. In so many ways, but we'll stick to one type for now. Dabi??? We been knew who he was, but it actually wasn't his backstory reveal trending that day, it was his name, which was also revealed 100 chapters ago! Just not connected to him. We got EVERYTHING wrong about his backstory, the single thing we got right was the method which was a beloved fandom dream.

(5) And even then some of the "method" caught us off guard, I won't spoil you but boy am I tempted to ramble cause these are all my favs too lol. Hawks? We got everything RIGHT. But in all the worst ways. Every crack theory we had became canon. Everything we thought about his backstory was severely understated or we were outright tricked into thinking it was something else because of how it was drawn. It does NOT help that these two aren't often written accurate and they LIE a lot. Good luck!

(6) Also I would love to know what your osmosis journey has taught you if you're willing to share, it's always funny I want to see if you fell for the same things we did or even the same things other osmosis readers fell for. It shows just how strong fanon becomes XD I could send a really long ask, but decided to send it in parts so you could hide it under a read more, since it looks like you don't like long posts. Also! I can find canon retellings, but how do you feel about canon set fic?

OKAY SO

funny story with (2) actually I have seen something like this happen in the star wars fandom, specifically with Dooku. I read several fics that referred to him as 'Yan Dooku' and there is so much spinoff material that, like, I went 'shrug even though this doesn't appear in the movies it might as well be true' bc it was in multiple fics. and then was brought up in question whether or not that Was His Actual Name and it had gotten into fandom osmosis enough that it made it onto a wiki page it took quite a while for me to convince myself that no.... no this wasn't actually Dooku's name...... canonically he only had one name...... someone had just picked it up and run with it..........

but that's so fun and funny I love it, good job fandom choosing names, that's great

I mean I Do Not Mind Spoilers, I'm already pretty spoiled for this thing and am only going to learn through fandom osmosis and love fandom stories so if you want to give me The True Story Of Trending/ Method, I would love that

also deeply amused that I picked the two most Fandom Rioting characters to love this is GREAT, I would absolutely love any set-in-canon fics mostly, like, 'alternate universe -- no quirks' doesn't interest me very much bc there's less grounding into the things that I find interesting in the setting, but otherwise p much anything goes

alright so the interesting thing with 'things I learned from osmosis' is that you need to understand that I started out this fandom reading a jjk crossover fic where My Fave Character Gojo Who Has Math Powers That Are Ridiculously Overpowered and this fic was 'Gojo Is Reincarnated As Dabi He Keeps His JJK Powers And Just Gets Dabi's Too And Decides Instead Of Being Responsible For The Whole World He'd Rather Just Fuck Around And Have Fun And Kind Of Accidentally Gets Labelled As A Supervillain For This And Doesn't Care And Is Also Adopting Half Of Class 1-A Bc The Teacher Instinct Never Goes Away' but it means that a whole bunch of things that were from the initial osmosis were like.... me knowing the character Gojo and assuming things were him and not BNHA; it took my a few chapters to figure out that Dabi was actually a character and not just the hero/villain name that they decided to give Gojo throwing him into the universe (and also that all the other characters who appeared were actual characters and not OCs)

but anyways some fun weird osmosis things

I at first thought that everywhere having star wars names was 100% just Gojo having fun naming places. the star wars names have come up enough that I'm pretty sure everywhere does have star wars names. this is so weird to me. like I guess if it's set on earth that's a historical reference not copyright infringement but W I L D

I've gotten used to gay canon pairings in a few things and I did legit think Aizawa and Present Mic were married for a little while. I think that's just a popular ship now but a person can dream

given other ridiculous parentage reveals (mostly Dabi) there are a number of fics where All For One is Izuku's father. I am now, like..... 65% convinced this is a fan theory but am leaving a 35% convinced this is canon

I figured out really quickly that Hawks/Dabi is a popular ship, which, like, good for them it's fun with their backstories but then exactly bc of the backstories and the ship, 100% assumed that 'Hawks goes undercover to try to infiltrate the League of Villains' was a contrived reason for them to interact. at this point I'm 95% sure that no that's an actual canon arc not just a fanfic thing

on the opposite end of the spectrum I am fairly sure that Dabi is not the lead singer of a mcr-style emo/punk/rock band but boy did y'all have me going for that one a lot

cannot tell how much the League of Villains are Misunderstood Poor Little Meow Meows who just want to Change Hero Society and Unfortunately Are Somewhat Willing To Murder To Get There and how much they are murdering psychopaths I think it's the latter but it's funny how many fics they seem a lot more willing to be chill in

also having a hard time telling who is currently dead or not as well as whether canon had a Nomu apocalypse arc and canon itself is now in some horrible everyone-barely-surviving setup or if things are more chill there but I hope y'all are having a good time wherever you are

those are most of the ones that I can think of, the rest of the osmosis has mostly been me picking up what the main events of the first few arcs are, general things about how quirks work, I'm fairly certain the reveal that One For All kills you/ages you at an accelerated rate came late enough bc there are a number of fics that are 'Izuku actually has a quirk!' that does not touch that angst at all but yeah out here having a good time mostly

[fragmentoftemptation]

The Spiral

Fandom: BNHA/ MHA

Characters: Shouto Todoroki, Dabi

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Artwork: @tweendeck

It was... Dabi. He had Touya's crystal blue eyes, but Shouto could barely recognize the man in front of him. Instead of bright red hair, he had shorter spiked Raven black hair. His entire lower jaw was covered in an intricate tattoo of black roses and vines that went all the way down his neck and disappeared under his shirt, more peaking out in full sleeves on each arm. He had snakebites and a spiked labret on his bottom lip, matching studs on the outside of each eyebrow, two subdermals at the top of sharpcut cheekbones, and more earrings than Shouto could count. He had thick black eyeliner under each eye, and his bottom lip was painted black to blend in with his tattoo. He was wearing a leather jacket and a tight blank tank underneath.

And he was actually there. In front of Shouto. For the first time in four years.

Hurry up and get in here before anyone else sees you," Touya urged, a note of annoyance in his voice. "And close the door."

Shouto nodded, closing the door quickly, and hurrying to sit down across from his brother. Touya fished a joint out of his pocket, a short burst of blue flame from his fingertips lighting it up. He took a deep hit as he looked at Shouto. Finally, he exhaled the smoke, flashing a lazy smile.

"It's good to see you Shouto," he said. "You look good. Almost too good. I expected you to wear something less like sex on legs."

"I wanted to fit in. I didn't want anyone to recognize me." Shouto admitted shyly, a definite blush rising to his cheeks.

"Well you definitely fit in. Guess I should be glad my old clothes are still being used. I would have thought daddy dearest tossed it all."

"He thinks we did. I had it all moved into storage with mom's stuff. I wanted you to have it for once you come back home." Shouto knew how childish it sounded. Four years later, he knew Touya would never come back to the house, but his stuff had been a way for Shouto to hold onto hope since he disappeared.

Touya's smile dropped. He sighed heavily.

"That's not going to happen. Shouto, that's not my life anymore. I belong here."

"But you don't have too Touya, you still-"

"Shhh..." Touya shushed him, standing up and peaking outside the door. "You can't use that name here. It's dangerous."

"It's your name." Shouto insisted.

"No. It's not anymore. Fuck Shouto. I don't know how you recognized me in the forest. But I know you have been googling me and the league and you have to stop. You are going to stir up trouble if you haven't already. This is all I have. And you don't want anything to do with it."

"Come home," Shouto could feel the tears gathering. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He would not cry. "Just come. Endeavor has the news in his pocket. He will help you twist the story, you don't have to work for the league."

"I can't. It's not that simple."

"Why not."

"You wouldn't understand."

"Try me."

"No. It wouldn't make a difference."

"It would to me!" Shouto yelled, standing up and leaning into Touya's face. Four years! Four years alone in that house with that asshole. "You left me with him. After years of promising me that we would leave together. That we wouldn't have to live in that house forever, and then you just left. You owe me an explanation, dammit!" He sat back down, glaring at his brother and trying to steady his breathing.

"You think you know what happened four years ago. You have no idea." Touya replied quietly, staring into a cup on the table.

"I know more than you think."

"Why? Because you checked out the police record?” His brother’s eyes shot up to meet Shouto’s. Shouto was taken back for a moment by how cold and emotionless they looked. He could see now how some of his classmates had described them that way. Touya’s hands were shaking, and he took another hit. “Yeah, I know about your attempts to find me. Shigaraki has kept an eye on anyone looking for me over the years. You're the only one Shouto. You're the only one who cared that Touya Todoroki was gone. And I don't care if you memorized that case file, you would still have no idea what really happened. Every word was a fucking lie."

"Then tell me the truth. Tell me what really happened!"

Dabi got quiet.

“It's not going to change anything."

"Fine. I still deserve to know the truth."

"Do you remember when Endeavor went on a talk show and told the world that you were training to be his successor despite the weak right side you had inherited from Mom?"

"Yes," Shouto remembered it well. After the accident with his mom, Shouto favored his right side. He barely used his fire during training. Endeavor resented it, and pulled that stunt to try and publicly embarrass him about his ice. After that day, Shouto swore he would never use his fire again. He didn’t need that bastard or his quirk to become a hero.

"It was a few days after that. You and he had gotten into an argument during training the night before. He was pissed. The next day was one of my intern days, and Endeavor decided he was going to be my patrol partner. He bitched and moaned and complained about you. Said he was going to find a way to make you use your left side. Whether you wanted to or not. I told him to shut the fuck up.” Dabi laughed, but it was a cold sound. “He didn’t take that very well. Reported me for aggressive behavior. About an hour later, we got called in for a bank robbery. Biggest crime I had gotten to help with since starting my internship. Endeavor was the highest ranked hero on site, so he became the mission lead. He was fighting with some villain in the bank, but they were a smart group. Two of the others split up, one had over a million yen with him, the other had a little girl as a hostage. Endeavor told me to retrieve the money, that another hero was on his way to retrieve the hostage. So I did. But I had only chased him a block when I found myself facing off against four of them. Even with a powerful quirk, I wasn’t enough to stop them. They beat the shit out of me and left with the money. When I got back to the scene, the other hero hadn’t arrived in time. The little girl had been killed.”

Dabi took a minute. His breathing was heavy. Shouto felt bad. It was clear this was a difficult memory for him. But he had to know. If he had any chance of understanding. He had to know what happened. So he waited, and after a moment, Dabi continued.

“Endeavor was pissed that I hadn’t retrieved the money. When we got back to the agency, I was in bad shape. Any other hero would have gone to the infirmary, but Endeavor handed me an icepack and told me to get to work on the paperwork. When I asked him what for, he told me that as my mistake had both cost the little girl her life and failed the primary objective of the mission, that it was my responsibility to complete all the paperwork for the death and the lost yen. My mistake. My fucking mistake.” Dabi took a sip of his drink, and a hit. His left hand was gripping his cup so hard his knuckles were white. “I knew it was no use arguing. There had been no other heroes around to witness his orders. So I took the paperwork. It took me hours, and I was exhausted by the time I got home.

When I got home, I found Endeavor in the training room. He was sitting in a chair smoking a cigar and staring at you. You were laying on the other side of the room, unconscious with your head resting in a puddle of blood. You had split the back of your head open and had some burns on your chest. It was clear you had tried to fight back, and your right arm had been overused. It was raw and bloody, and looked like dad had pushed you way past minor frostbite from quirk overuse. When I asked him what had happened, he shrugged and told me that one day you would use your left side, one way or another. I started to gather you up to take you to the hospital, and he told me to leave you and go to bed. He said you would never learn your lesson if we healed you.”

“And I snapped. The next thing I knew, I was attacking him with my flames. I don’t really know what I expected to accomplish, but I attacked him with everything I had. But the bastard is strong, and I was already in bad shape from the day. He left me with third-degree burns all over my face and arms. He knew he had fucked up right away, and was forced to call the hospital. But to cover up for his abuse, he said I attacked you because I was on drugs. He paid someone off to falsify a drug test saying I had done LSD. Luckily the hospital was able to minimize the damage, though the burns were too severe to completely heal the scars. The doctors recommended one month in the hospital for healing and physical therapy for my face and arms.”

“A week later, Endeavor checked me out of the hospital in the middle of the night, and drove me to the worst part of town. He said he would never abide to have a child who would raise a hand against him. I had lost the right to be called a Todoroki. He told me to leave town. He said if he ever saw me again, he would have mom killed in the hospital. And he would Shouto. He really would have. He had you, that was all he ever needed from her. He left me there, and reported me as a runaway. He cut access to all my accounts, and closed all of my cards. I had nothing but the clothes on my back. It was Shigaraki who helped me. If he hadn’t taken me in, I probably would have died.”

Shouto felt like he had been punched in the stomach. He thought he might be physically sick. His mind warred between the police report and Touya’s chilling memories. He wanted to say something, but he didn’t know where to begin. He knew Endeavor was low, and he knew the pro hero had paid people off to spin a story in his favor before. But even he hadn’t thought his father was capable of sinking so low. Endeavor had nearly killed two of his children that night. He had left Touya for dead.

Touya laughed, another cold and bitter laugh as he raised the joint back up to his lips.

“Do you feel better, Shouto? Will it help you sleep better at night, knowing the truth?”

Shouto looked up at Touya. At Dabi. This wasn’t fair. Endeavor shouldn’t be able to get away with this.

“We can fix it. If we work together, we can go to the newspaper without him knowing. We can set the record straight. You and I could get an apartment, and we could both escape that asshole.” Shouto was reaching for strings, anything. There had to be a way to fix this.

“That sounds real nice, Shouto. But there is no going back. I have done things in these past four years. I didn’t just run away and sit on my fucking thumbs. I am a member of the League of Villains. If you knew the things I have done, you would be disgusted. There is no more Touya Todoroki, Shouto. Dabi is all that is left.”

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21759583/chapters/51915700

[hotwings0203]

I feel like Dabi would be the type of dude who would bully you incessantly at the LOV and for the life of you you can’t figure out why. He’s always around you and making snarky comments or pulling your hair, trying to catch you messing up on missions. You’re sure he hates you, and you do well to stay out of his way, or sometimes when you feel bold you’ll offer a quip of your own. The bullying increases whenever you talk to other guys at the bar, especially when you make Tomura crack a smile, Dabi’s breathing down your neck the second your leader leaves, calling you terrible names and pushing past your boundaries.

Cw: language, nsfw, noncon, manga spoilers, some angst?

In a perfect world, Touya would not have been abandoned and rejected by his family. In a perfect world, Dabi would not exist, and Touya would be eating dinner with his family right now as he shows his little brother how to properly wield fire to its fullest extent.

But there was no such thing as a perfect world, and therefore Dabi did exist. And Dabi doesn’t care for anyone, or anything.

Or so he tells himself.

“Slut”

“Nothing but eye candy, and shitty eye candy at that”

It’s nothing you haven’t heard before, but it doesn’t make it any easier to ignore him

“What was that all about, huh? The fuck are you and crusty snickering about?”

Fed up with his continuous antics, you decide to mouth off a little too.

“Oh nothing, just talking about how adorable you and Hawks would make as a couple. And wipe that sneer off your face, it looks like some of your staples fell out of your mouth.”

It’s nothing too snarky, but in a second he’s shoving you in some dark room, forearm pinned against your throat as his hand is lit up with blue flames merely inches away from you, snarling in your face.

“You wanna be funny, bitch? I got jokes of my own too, why dont I show you what happens to dumb little girls who don’t know their fucking place? I think that would be real funny.”

But his hand is stopped from drawing near your wide eyes when you both hear Twice and Toga calling everyone for their next meeting.

He pushes you away from him, giving you a murderous look over his shoulder as he leaves the room, not paying mind to the way you slide down the wall in the dark.

You take extra precaution to try avoiding him for the next few days, not even making eye contact with him when you two get teamed up for tasks. He never mentions the room incident, if anything he acts as if it never happens. It’s like whiplash for you, he tries to weirdly talk to you more but all you offer him is mumbles and hums of agreement.

The conversation is never long, but it starts to be less talk of degrading you and more of begrudging questioning of what you’ve been up to. You never engage, opting to pretend like you never heard him, and strangely enough he leaves it be.

You give him a side eye one day as he joins you at the bar (much to your discontent), downing your glass just to fill another.

He says nothing as he slides into the stool right next to you, and pours a glass of whiskey for himself as well.

It’s awkwardly silent, you’re not sure if you should leave or not, but you’d be damned if you try to initiate small talk with this psycho.

But then, he speaks.

“Is Shigaraki sending you on the mission to get that UA kid?”

His gravely voice rumbles and cracks from his usual lack of use, and he clears his throat after he talks.

“No.”

“Oh.”

This is excruciating, you think to yourself as he mulls over the drink in his hand for a silent minute or two.

Toga calls you over thankfully at the exact same moment, and you breathe out an inaudible sigh of relief as you slip off the stool to join her.

“Wait-“ Dabi grabs your arm and you flinch out of instinct, expecting a slap or a burn to come from him.

He sees your reaction and shakes his head dismissively, letting you go and muttering a “Nevermind”. You don’t ponder over it as you trip over your own feet to join the eccentric blond.

A week passes, and then two. With each day you maneuver your way around him, request to be partnered up with different people in private, and busy yourself in random tasks. Every time you pass him by the bar he lifts his head from whatever he’s doing and tries to maintain eye contact with you, even going so far as to open his mouth to say or ask god-knows-what.

You try to ignore the foreign hopeful glint in his glacial eyes as you walk right past him, ducking your head as you do so.

It drives Dabi crazy.

He can’t handle any more rejection, he thought his family would be the last straw for him to ever want recognition or love validation from again. He wants to talk to you, to hear your voice as it snaps back with witty comebacks of your own that he secretly enjoys so much, even if it means he has to force it out of you with hateful words. He wants to feel your hair underneath his scarred hands, even if he has to mask the soft wanting of you in forms of yanking the strands. He wants nothing more than to see your eyes fill up with no other sight than him and think only of him, even if it means he has to corner you and scare you into submission.

But your silence is something he’s not used to.

Well, to be fair, you weren’t silent completely, but the only sentences he was hearing from you nowadays was when you were speaking to Shigaraki or the other League members.

You were the only idiot who didn’t notice the smoke curling from his nostrils and ears comically when he’d finally see you stop your stoic act just to open up to other men apart from him. Spinner, Twice, and Compress backed off almost immediately from talking to you for too long when they’d see the look on his face as he watched you surrounded by them, but Tomura would merely smirk from behind your shoulders and keep a level gaze with his subordinate, knowing fully well why he was so pissed off.

You began to notice the weird energy at the base soon after the rest of the men would keep curt conversations with you in comparison to your long talks about video games, sex, and life after you would all win the war.

So you thought it would be best to ask the most semi-normal person there that wasn’t fueled with testosterone and aggression.

“I just don’t get it, why are they all being weird? I mean, we all used to talk so much and now they just...try avoiding me. Except for Tomura of course, he’s still normal I guess. But he always has this smirk on his face when I’m with him and I can’t figure out why.”

Toga stops cleaning her blood-laced needle to give you a sly look, all fangs and glinting white.

“And Dabi?”

“What about him?”

She sits back on her haunches and cocks her head at you. “You really don’t know what’s happening here, do ya?”

“No,” you roll your eyes in exasperation. “But I’ll gladly take any theories here, since apparently I’m the only one who doesn’t get it.”

“He likes you.”

You gape at her for a moment and then burst out laughing.

“What? That’s crazy, he doesn’t like me, he hates me!” He can barely stand being in a room with me, all he does is talk shit and harass me.”

The blond curiously licks at a bead of red from the top of the weapon and you cringe when her own tongue rips from the sharp point.

“You say he can’t stand being in a room with you, so then why is it that he’s always there? He might talk shit, but he talks to you out of everyone else right? Regardless of if it’s something mean.”

You’re thoroughly flabbergasted. She had a point, but it was too much to wrap your head around. She cheerfully hums and gets up to flounce around the room, cleaning her already-tidy room up to a T.

“And that little silent treatment act you’re giving him isn’t helping either. I swear, Jin told me Dabi almost burned his mouth off that one day you, him and Spinner were talking about GTA. He totally cornered the poor guy and threatened his life if he didn’t stop talking to you.”

“You’re joking.”

“Am not. He wanted to do the same to Tomura but I figure he wants to keep his job, so he won’t. Doesnt make it any better for him when you’re all chummy with the one person Dabi can’t stand the most, though.”

No wonder your leader was so smug whenever you two were in the same room, your attention solely focused on him.

You run your hands down your face, moaning about the whole situation being fucked. It’s just your luck that you couldn’t take a clue, but to be fair, how could you? Being called worthless and a waste of space wasn’t exactly what you had in mind for flirty banter.

“Soooo what’re you gonna do now? I heard he’s gonna try talking to you for realsies like, tomorrow or something.”

“Tomorrow?” You yelp, jumping up to your feet. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I can’t face him!”

“Oops,” she giggles, twirling with outstretched arms around her room and falling down onto her bed.

“Oh god, I can’t do this. I don’t even know if I like him! He’s such an ass, and even when he tries to come off as normal he’s just so..unsettling. I don’t think I’ve ever had a good conversation with him.”

Toga props her elbow up to rest her chin on her hand, frowning in thought.

“Why not just tell him how you feel?”

You snort and fold your arms. “Yeah, because the psycho arsonist is really gonna take the word no well.”

“Hmm.. I see what you mean. Oh well, whatever you choose, I’ll support you!”

And with that she skips out of the room sing songing for Twice to make a clone for her.

You were fucked.

And sure enough, the next day he approaches you, hands stuffed in his pockets and an almost bored look on his face.

“Yo newbie, I gotta talk to you for a second. Come with me”.

You look blearily up at him through eye bags and mussed hair, a direct telling of your sleepless night. Your stomach drops when you hear his words, but you nod your head and take a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself of the speech you practiced till the sun rose.

No one else is bothering you both today, Shigaraki having gone to visit All For One and the rest of the League left to their own devices. It was something you weren’t so comfortable with, but you doubted a hero would come to save you.

He leads you through the short winding hallways, each step of his growing louder and heavier as the space started growing smaller. Finally, he reaches a dimly lit room and stops outside the door, gesturing for you to go in with a casual wave of his patched wrist.

“After you.”

You raise an unsure eyebrow at his uncharacteristic show of consideration, and do as he says. You’re sweating bullets, fists balled so that your nails are digging into your palms, and vision going in and out of focus as your eyes begin to adjust to your surroundings.

A loud bang pulls you out of your stupor, and you whip around at the sound.

Dabi is already staring back at you with lidded eyes, leaning his weight against the door, his arms crossing over each other.

You shift on both feet, picking at your nails nervously.

“So, what did you wanna talk about?”

He says nothing, but just observes you, his head slightly tilted as if you were some abstract art piece.

“Dabi.”

“You got a lot of nerve, y’know that?”

He pushes himself off the wall and advances slowly towards you, hands stuffed in his trench coat pockets.

You immediately back up with raised palms, sputtering indignantly at his offensive movements coming closer and closer. However you thought his ‘confession’ would go, this was most definitely not starting out like how you planned

“Excuse me? What’re you talking about-“

“I know what you’re doing. You think whoring yourself out to ol’ crusty and the rest of the guys here is gonna make everyone forget just how useless you actually are. What the fuck do you even do here? You fuck up half the missions which I have to come bail your ass out of, you constantly put us in jeopardy by being all friendly with everyone, and you can’t even keep your mouth shut when I need to let off a little steam, as I rightfully should.”

In a perfect world, Dabi would be the light of your eyes, the hero of your world. In a perfect world, Dabi would be able to hold your hand in his smooth one and tell you that he wants you so much that it impairs his rational judgement and makes him say things he doesn’t mean. He’d tell you that your presence is like a weight lifted off his chest, your presence means he doesn’t have to think or worry about the outside world, he just wants you all to himself without anyone interfering.

But this is not a perfect world, and Dabi is not a hero, but rather one of the worst villains.

So he does exactly what one does as a villain.

Instead of a loving look that he knows he’s incapable of, Dabi looks down into your horrified gaze as he traps you against the wall between his scarred arms, spewing misplaced venom at you.

“I don’t know what your problem is, but you need to chill out. First you go ballistic on me ‘cause I talked to Tomura for no reason, then you act all weird and quiet as if you’re some decent person, and now you think you can just bring me in here and tell me how worthless I am? Go fuck yourself, seriously.”

You scoff and make your way to push him but stop when he does what he did a couple weeks ago. You hold bated breath as he casually brings an inflamed hand to scratch at his face as if he can’t feel the hellfire emitting from it, and let out a whine of distress as he lowers his head mere inches from yours, lips almost touching.

“Stop talking to the rest of the guys,” he breaths. “Stop smiling, laughing, or going near anyone who isn’t me.”

You wonder if he knows how insane he sounds. He does, but that’s nothing he doesn’t know already. If anything, it solidifies in his mind that if he is to be as bad as the world has made him out to be, then he is acting exactly fit for the role.

“Why?”

“I don’t need to give sluts like you a reason. It should come as easy, right? What’s putting out for one more person?”

Your eyes are brimming with tears now, your stoic facade showing cracks as you sniffle a little bit.

He eats it up and groans watching salty rivers cascade down your cheeks. Suddenly, he feels as though he can no longer hold back anymore, he feels as though if he thinks for one more second he’ll combust.

So, acting on instinct, he surges forward and presses his lips against yours, swallowing your cries of distress and holding your hands above your head in midst of them frantically beating on his chest.

Your lips are so, so soft compared to his and it’s making him sink deeper into this instinctual daze. He puffs against your writhing lips as he thrusts his hot tongue in your mouth.

You try to bite him but when his hands heat up against your skin you resign to your fate and wail, allowing him to pull his hips flush against yours and start humping your thighs.

He draws back and bites your lips, teeth clacking against yours as he does so. You open your terrified eyes and blanch when you see the look on his face.

Lust is clearly drawn everywhere, from his blown pupils to his heaving chest, all the way to his flushed face and wild eyes. He looks as though he’s about to eat you alive and it’s appropriate that you feel like a lamb about to be slaughtered.

“Dabi, wait, please stop-“

But he cuts your pants off again in favor of slamming his hips against yours again and grinding impossibly hard on your legs, the friction of his jeans catching on your clothed cunt and forcing a mewl out of you.

“I’m not gonna stop. I’ve had enough of you teasing. You’re mine now, and if it takes burning our dear leader alive and this whole place down for you to understand that then I’ll fucking do it.”

He thought that terrorizing you would ease the empty feeling in his heart, that continuously berating you would force him to see you as what he always said you were, just another empty headed cunt. He thought that distancing himself from you and focusing on other things would make him forget about the soft feelings he longed to share with you, feelings he thought perished in the fire he was in when he was a young boy .

Even now, there is an ache in his chest as he hears you beg for him to stop, to let you go, that you’re sorry for whatever you did.

But this is not a perfect world, and not everyone gets their way in life.

You should really learn that, because Dabi already has.

And so Dabi will act accordingly to what life has put out before him .

[codenamesazanka]

2/3 of chapter translation to the best of my abilities.

Dabi: The hell is a crazy woman like you doing. Didn’t expect you to have a heart for sentimentality

Toga: Just curious about my home. It's normal.

Dabi: Ha. Are you ready for this?

Toga: For what?

Dabi: What else? Ready for the end of the world.

Toga: A little late for that.

Dabi: Good. No matter who's crying or laughing, tomorrow will come equally. Well, then, Let's laugh, Toga Himiko.

Dabi: Humans live to laugh.

Toga: …They'll discover us, Touya-kun. —You're so nice.

Dabi: The current system doesn't have the strength to catch up to us. Being nice— I want Endeavor to have a difficult time! Let's use it.

Dabi: Transformation. Use for someone you love from the bottom of your heart. Now you can use That Quirk, too, with your blood Before Machia picked me up, I took it from the real thing— Twice's blood. Let the Sad Man’s Parade continue. The ones who'll be laughing at the end… …Will be us.

Spinner: Shigaraki, are you ok—

AFO: There’s no need to worry. Tomura is recovering nicely. He's in the process of transcending the Quirk Doomsday Theory.

Spinner: Shigaraki... What is that?

AFO(?): Ah yes, of course.

Skeptic: Spinner. Within villain offenses, You know how much percentage of the crimes committed by villains are attributed to heteromorphs. To that extent, No matter how many countries and heroes shine, the light can never reach that darkness. There are no shortage of hetermorphs who hold a grudge against those that call themselves Heroes.

Skeptic: Our remnants have pulled in this flow. Since the League of Villains’ early days, you have exposed your form to the public eye and been doxxed. That costume, once just a poor copy, now has become a star that guides the heteromorphs.

Spinner: …A fancy palanquin that’s easy to carry. {A saying, basically means he’s a easily manipulated figurehead.} I don't have such a pretentious motive. I’m just...

Skeptic: The die has been cast. Prison breaks aside, the rioters are waiting for you. You must pull the trigger on behalf of ReDestro.

Spinner, thinking: I’m just a lower-class nobody whose thoughts doesn’t matter. It’s too late to stop the current.

AFO: Your one small step… …will give everyone courage.

Shigaraki: Destroy it.

Spinner, thinking: Well Let's not think about it anymore. Shigaraki I'm only doing this for you—

AFO: That's right, Iguchi-kun. Anyone can be... ...someone's hero!

-

take with grain of salt; esp with some parts like Dabi's description of Toga's quirk and AFO's bit about the Quirk Doomsday Theory. anyways, yeah!!! Woo! Villain Chapter!

[paterprouno]

Headcanons ~ Parent issues

Also partially a theory. All for One parents were likely good people but not good parents. As he was born during the dawning of quirks he would be born in Japanese society of modern day. Which means those that stood out are shunned and outcasted from the group. You are raised to be part of the mold, to fit in, and outliers are bullied until they do.

All for One, being one of the first, had a lot of traits that would make him stand out in society. His crimes in a strict society is ‘selfish’, stands out(white hair), dramatic, hand markings, and basically the things he loves about villain characters. Remember despite the western influence he is still Japanese. So all these things wouldn’t just make him seem ‘odd’ it vilifies him even if he wasn’t actually doing anything malicious.

Now add crazy powers that everyone freaking out about and you have a boy that stands out drastically. His parents might have tried to make him fit in like dying his hair and trying to teach him how to be polite even when wronged. But he would have resisted it since his quirk instinctively makes him selfish and being forced to change is an offense to a young kid. Like how dare you why can’t you just love me? What wrong with how I am?

Yoichi, however, while still had the white hair color had a demeanor that fitted a lot better into society. He was calm, quiet, and was a team player that would work with others. It possible that despite being sickly the parents subtly favored him. Thus why always emphasize AFO to take care of his little brother.

It was the one selfish thing he enjoyed doing that also made him seem like a good person to society. He was praised for taking care of his brother and his little brother appreciated him. His brother found his quirk amazing not something to hide either so he grew very attached.

What does this have to do with parents?

I believe they thought they were doing good because not many people know how to raise a sociopath. Because that is what All for One is and how he able to be so far removed from others despite being human. They only were able to ingrain in him the importance of family but he twisted it into literally trapping family.

I imagine his backstory a mix of ALL the main LOV own. Shunned by parents because something wrong with him(Toga and blood desire/AFO and his lack of empathy), outcasted by peers because stands out by fear(Spinner), neglected and unloved by parents for the surperior offspring(Touya/Dabi), and of course Tomura. His family killing him with kindness while they looked down on all his desires.

Does this justify everything he has done? No, but it explains why he is drawn to other kids fucked over by society. Why he always seems to be there before disaster and his hatred to bad parents despite being a terrible person. To him it’s personal it feels like he’s looking at his own parents.

And that is why he is suddenly Dabi biggest supporter in newest chapter and so hostile toward Endeavor. He’s seeing his parents in him.

[lexxiie]

Random question but, do you think Dabi will be redeemed? I feel like shigaraki will since the possibility has been presented many times but dabi seems to have no remorse at all... idk I would love it if he could be redemeed but I can't see it happening

Manga spoilers ahead

Oh boy... I saw a post talking about this a couple of days ago and I strongly agree with everything that person said. (If someone knows which post I'm referring to, please let me know because I couldn't find it.)

I must admit that I have no idea anon. I am a 100% sure Shigaraki will be redeemed, but with Touya, I have a lot of theories on how his story will end.

We saw that when they refer to Shigaraki, Izuku always uses the word "save", but when the Todoroki's talk about Touya, they say "stop." This throwed me off quite a bit when I noticed. Now, I believe Touya is as much of a victim as Tomura, however, there are many things that we see in Tomura, but not in Touya. "But, Lexie, what are you talking about?" Remorse. Hesitation. Care for others.

I'm a huge Touya stan, but I'll always remember the chapter where Twice dies, not because of the fact tha Hawks killed him, (I think he had no choice) but mostly because what truly surprised me about that chapter was Touya's reaction. He looked happy, ecstatic, actually. We know he plans on killing Shouto and also tried to kill Natsuo, which tell us he has no love left for his family (apparently). His desire for vengance is much greater than anything else. What I'm trying to say is that I'm very confused on how Horikoshi wants us to see Touya (What does he want to represent using him?). I'm afraid that, while Shigaraki represents a person who was ruined by hero society, but who's still a good person deep down, Touya may be meant to represent a person who was ruined by hero society permanently. Two parallels. HOWEVER, Touya is also a parallel to Shouto. Touya is what Shouto would've been if he had kept all his hatred in his heart. In this case, I believe in the whole "Shouto will save Touya."

This leads to my last theory, where Shouto does save his brother but in the end, Touya dies anyway, probably heroically to represent his desire of becoming a hero, proving that Dabi is gone, and the child was still there all along. I HOPE he lives. I totally love his character so, so much and I could do an entire essay on that. I would be very disappointed if he dies a villain, I think that would be very unfair. In conclusion, I believe this can go 3 ways. He is redeemed and lives, He is redeemed and dies, He is not redeemed and is killed by Shouto. (or just killed.) If I'm being completely honest, I think it will be the second option, but my wishful thinking is hoping it will be the first one. I don't know. Too many thoughts. What do you guys think?

[serostuffsmh]

Bnha Villains Morning Headcanons

Anon asked: Can I request headcanons about waking up with the LOV gang? Maybe gender neutral if you want. Thanks

Tomur Shigaraki

- If you weren’t there to wake him up headass would probably sleep into the afternoon

- Hes extra sassy in the morning but don’t take it to heart he’ll snap out of it once he’s eaten

- He can also get pretty clingy in the morning

- You know when you get out of your warm bed and the rest of the house is freezing? Yeah that’s Tomura.

- He will be cozying up next to you in attempt to warm up

- “I didn’t know you were so affectionate.”

- “Shut up. I feel like I’m in an icebox.”

- For his coffee he’d probably have two milk and two sugar (weak)

- For breakfast he’s more into quick meals

- So expect things like cereal or instant porridge (ikr our gamer king eating porridge)

Dabi

- He does work pretty late and sometimes he’s going the bed the same time you wake up

- Even when he isn’t working he’s still not budging when you try waking him up in the morning

- He will either roll over and complain or pull you into his arms and complain

- You’ll have to wrestle out of his arms which will earn you an irritated huff from him

- Let the man sleep in (he deserves it)

- Eventually you should wake him up with some coffee

- A strong take is he doesn’t like that shitty instant coffee instead opting for the expresso machine you both bought

- One of the longest people to get ready since he’s not a morning person

- Ever since you’ve been together he’s actually been eating in the morning (mf would probably just drink coffee)

- He usually likes tradition breakfast in the morning (cause of the dabi/touya theory he was probably raised on traditional breakfast)

- In the morning he’d eat tamagoyaki, rice, and since he doesn’t like fish opt for having pork instead

Himiko Toga

- Himiko would probably wake up late morning and she would need coaxing out of bed

- She’d be super pouty about it but eventually she’d roll out of bed

- When she finally gets up you both spend your morning getting ready to go out

- She loves to go out to eat breakfast but she does have to transform herself so she won’t be recognized

- You both would probably go to a breakfast styled cafe

- For breakfast she is more of a sweets girl

- She’s more inclined to western style breakfast like pancakes and French toast

- Poor kid hates coffee and would probably want boba instead

- If she has to be somewhere for the league she’ll have to skip the café breakfast and have a quick to-go meal

Mr. Compress

- One of the only ones that is responsible enough to wake up at a decent hour

- He might even wake you up if you didn’t already

- would definitely greet you with a peck on the cheek (awe)

- In the morning the first thing he’s doing is making coffee

- If he doesn’t have at least two cups of coffee in the morning he will be yawning throughout the day

- Before the two of you get ready you gotta have breakfast of course

- Like a gentleman would he’ll try helping you

- Try. Everything is burning and over cooked when he’s in the kitchen.

- “You’re suppose to flip the pancakes over.”

- “That would have been good to know beforehand.”

- Hes down for anything in the morning as long as it’s not processed

- would rather keel over then eat instant oats

- If you’re tired of hearing the smoke detector go off when he’s in the kitchen with you

- I’d recommend going to a breakfast café

Twice

- Not a morning person either but it’s easier getting him out of bed (sort of)

- “It’s time to get up, big man.”

- “Alright alright… don’t tell me what to do!”

- He’ll need a few minutes to get out of sleepy haze and what better way then to greet him with coffee

- Dad noises™️

- A true dad when it comes to coffee (he gives off like dilf vibes okay)

- Black coffee with two sugar

- As much as he loves admiring you from the bed he does eventually get up to help with breakfast

- Like dabi before he met you the poor man would probably eat leftover food from last nights dinner or not eat at all

- Breakfast with him would be pretty hardy like an omelette with nori, and cheese and some other protein

- You both spend a lot of time just basking in each other presence it almost feel like your living a normal life

- Mornings with him are literally living the domestic dream

Overhaul

- Mornings with him are pretty lonely considering he wakes up before you get up

- He lets you sleep in because he realizes that you value your rest

- So expect to roll over and find no one next to you

- After your morning routine you have to hunt him down and make sure he eats breakfast

- He has a habit of skipping breakfast and going straight to ‘work’

- You’d be doing everyone a favour since he gets in a foul mood when he doesn’t eat

- He’s pretty traditional so he would most likely have a Japanese breakfast (miso soup, fish, rice)

- His coffee order would probably be black with a little bit of cream (he prefers tea more though)

- He wouldn’t mind if you wanted to eat breakfast of your choice but it’d have to be a balanced, and healthy (a health nut when it comes to his diet)

- Only on a special occasion will he let you go all out for the both of you

- You want to make Crepes? Go for it. Croissants? Of course. Belgian style waffles? He did say anything...

- He won’t admit it to you but he does see the appeal of these types of breakfast

[aimeramie]

001 huwumi + 002 takeyama yuu ✨

Thank you for these, Camie!! 😊

Send me characters or ships.

001 | huwumi

when I started shipping it if I did: around the same time I started shipping dabihawks, sometime after the high-end fight when I jumped completely on board the “dabi is todoroki touya” theory. 

my thoughts: perfect. adorable. would cry if they became canon.

what makes me happy about them: everything! their love languages are similar (sharing meals). they would both love each other and treat each other so well.

what makes me sad about them: their childhoods. the abuse and neglect they endured. it makes me sad to think about keigo, alone, trying to repair the house he lived in, a rundown shack slowly falling apart, knowing fuyumi was also trying to do the same on an emotional level in her own broken home.

things done in fanfic that annoys me: hawks pursuing fuyumi because he realizes he cannot have her father 🤢 

things I look for in fanfic: I take what I can get with huwumi fanfics since there are only like 300 in existence, but getting together stuff~

who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: for fuyumi, definitely iida tensei. for keigo, while I wouldn’t say no to dabihawks canon (it would never happen), I’d rather keigo and touya not end up with anyone. I want to see keigo and touya figure themselves out, and for keigo’s brotherly birb bond with fumikage and touya’s relationship with shouto to be their focuses.

my happily ever after for them: comfortable domesticity and a cute family complete with a precious phoenix baby~ all we need first are some soft and/or flirty exchanges at a todofam dinner! 

who is the big spoon/little spoon: keigo is the big spoon, and he covers them both with his wing, of course!  

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: cooking together :) feeding each other little bites while they move around the kitchen.

002 | takeyama yuu

how I feel about this character: LOVE HER! 

all the people I ship romantically with this character: kamui woods

my non-romantic OTP for this character: hawks, I like the idea of him nesting in her hair when she is big haha.

my unpopular opinion about this character: she is the best female pro-hero? is that unpopular? I mean... she actually has character development.

one thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: honestly, I am completely satisfied with yuu in canon. her interaction with shouto? hilarious. her fight with machia? badass. I was so happy to see her stick around as a hero when all the heroes who became heroes for fame started to quit. she has grown so much since her debut, and I think she’s great.

my OTP: mt. kamui

my cross over ship: don’t have one! 

a headcanon fact: her mother and father paid for some serious property damage the day her quirk manifested 😂

[hamliet]

I’d like to give an explanation for Hawks.

As a child no one aided Hawks. We could argue the commission did , but in the end he not there different from a child solider, the viceversa of Shigaraki: groomed to be an hero. While Hawks could accept this because of his desire to save others, he had little choice in merit.

One of the main narrative I’ve found is that he defined his parents as broken, and he basically put some distance - left them behind - to not be “broken” like them, as to mark an inherent conception of passing down being rotten. My theory is Dabi went there just to film hawks reaction it i hearing his name or the truth. This mean that in his original retoric he also found (or better hori made him say) exactly what Hawks fears: being broken. This also collided with Dabi rethoric : you reap what you sow and you can’t escape from this.

In this chapter Hawks evilly glare at Enji asking about Shoto’s scar. This means while Hawks still has a weak spot for Endeavor , he has started to lose his “idol”. This also bring up another theme similar to Touya: Endeavor “has to be perfect and flawless”. Now hawks is confronting with the reality Enji is extremely far from perfect. However his needs to prove of not being broken, of being useful and in general a good person is starting to falter.

Imo hawks was so (rightly) terrified of being broken and craved for being like Endeavor (flawless and perfect) because he was not for his parents. But Enji was admired , he saved him so... being like him it’s a good thing right? Thought this I think Hawks built a rigid standard of criteria to divide good and bad and to keep on using this values as a moral compass , so that he would always be a good person. If you had the commission way, you’d obtain such a rigidity so hawks is down to do everything to be a “good person”. This is evident when he bow to the commission: he being a good person is even more valuable than his own life and health (a day passed, he’s severely wounded and he had already started to work again).

To me this rigidity is pervasive to anything and matches with the “greater good”: it’s like a chess game and hawks is nothing more than a pawn in his own head, for the greater good, but it is? It’s not changing society , but rather I think it’s to be a good person at core

Part 1

This also matches Dabi: both of them will answer that they do this for something great (stain and heroes vs society sake and greater good) but really, I think that at the base there are their personal issues: being recognised by his father and being a good and useful kid for his mother.

And in fact since his first introduction Hawks always had this type of dichotomy: he’s willing to be stained if it’s for the greater good. And this is contradictory: what is it the great good ? And how can be good if you re stained? And in fact he never accepted such a thing. Yeah we could argue it was the commission , but the reality is that Hawks is not willing to give “his all”: he wasn’t willing to let Dabi attach the city of fukuoka ; he wasn’t willing to kill Jeanist for real. Because if he allows such things he would be a bad person. So greater good is a facade, much like society is Dabi’s facade for craving Enji’s attention (in a pulsion of death style aka the destruction of what it’s loved).

But he met Twice. And twice was the worst to him. Dealing with Dabi is easy: he behaved very evilly, he broke their pact, he asked for someone corpse. So dabi is “evil” and Hawks is “good”. But twice ? He was sweet. Caring. Trusty. Fun. He really felt close to hawks. And once again hawks tries to be a “good person”. But twice is a problem because while he’s a villain (he kills , he steals he kidnaps) but Twice is a good person. I think Hawks never meant to kill him. Instead he was facing a deep crisis: if he left twice alive and he rampaged killing tons of people , hawks would have been a good person? But if he killed a “friend” a nice guy and wonderful friend , someone who welcomed him, would he be a good person? Before dabi arrival I thin hawks was just threatening twice. If he wanted to kill him he could have done sooner.

As fat gum said , there’s only ONE way for an hero to win: no causalties and make the villain lose his will to fight. And this is the route hawks wanted to take : make twice surrender. It was the only way to solve the dilemma : killing twice meant killing a good person. Sparing a villain means to be a bad person. Howeve then Dabi arrived and he posed as a threat. In the first part of the battle hawks saved twice. Meaning that he and twice allign: Dabi is the villain. But this isn’t the case. Exactly because twice is a good person he can’t leave the league. So this is another stall: hawks has to kill twice (he can’t see others right thanks to the commission i think ) but at the same time the reason is the twice is indeed a very good person at his core.

Hawks is capable of incredible speed and cutting power, so I’ve always wonder why he was stalling over twice corpse like that.

There’s a movie , I don’t recall the title, in which a ss soldier asks a Jews teacher to prepare him for an exam in a lager. The teacher knows ethics , philosophy and religion. The teacher takes the occasion to prove the moral law (the universal law inside of any of us to decide if something is right or wrong). The ss answers “you’re are Jews, you are the evil!” But the teacher proves him wrong again and again. Finally the ss pull out a gun but he then is not able to shot. The professor says “this is the moral law. It doesn’t matter what you’ve been taught. Deep down you know it’s wrong”.

I insist hawks is numb to moral law. He instead seeks “greater good” to prove is a good person. But twice tested him. Toga question “So jin wasn’t a person?” It’s fitting : in that moment to hawks jin wasn’t a person. He saved jin. He gave him a chance. He was a good person. But jin refused , high fives dabi he would have killed anyone. It was “Jin” . It was “Twice” and a good person must end a bad person. Especially after this one refuse any “chance of redemption”. However the way he was bent all over twice makes me think he knew it. He knew he had done a bad thing. That was the moral law: he seemed exhausted

Part 2

Thank you for this! I found it very insightful and interesting to read :D

[torilovestowrite]

[18+] Dabi x Reader; Try Again pt. 10.5

Synopsis: Years ago, (Y/n) was left by her villain boyfriend, Dabi after discovering an unexpected news. Ever since then, she never had a lover— focusing on her only son, Yuta. Later on, she meets Todoroki Touya— a new co-worker who seem to be persistent towards winning her heart and attention.

Ship: Dabi x Fem! Reader

❗❗❗Content Warning: Mentions of Abortion, Unplanned Pregnancy, Manga spoilers, Dabi is a Todoroki theory

chapter navigation 

A/N: THIS IS SMUT SOOOO PLS CLICK READ MORE!! 

WARNING: SOFT/VANILLA SECKS WITH OUR VERY OWN TOUYA UwU

"Hey," Y/n greeted Touya who entered her room at the late midnight. "Do you need anything?" 

Two fucking weeks since the kitchen incident. And guess what? Both of them are back together in each others' arms; their love becoming sweeter than the one that was formed in the past. Both of them started to interact sweetly in front of Yuta— Touya placing an arm around Y/n's shoulder while she lays her head closer towards him. The young boy found it odd— but either way, the young h/c-haired lad felt happy for his mother. She started smiling again— which made Yuta think that she was joyful with having a companion. 

If there's something that Y/n loved in terms of Touya's changes, that would be his approach. He was no longer the rough and playful Dabi who never took a thing seriously— but Touya, a good father to Yuta and a great lover towards her. His gentle moves made her heart topple and shake; how he'd be sweet towards their son; no signs of Dabi at all, Y/n thought. 

"Yeah, you." Touya replied, sitting on the space beside her bed and hugging her— putting his arms around her waist. Y/n smiled at this and began to play with his red fluffy hair. "I need you right now." 

The h/c-haired lady chuckled in response as she listened to Touya, asking him a question. "Sweet. What's the deal today?" 

"Nothing really. Just want to cuddle with you a bit, I guess." Touya answered, planting a peck on her lips. "I just miss spending time with you like this as much as before..." 

Touya swore that he could hear every beating of her heart; how fast it is— yet calm. It was a beautiful sound to his ears. The sound even grew louder as they both looked at each others' face; a small smile planted on their lips. 

"Can I..." The red-haired man looked at her to ask for permission, caressing Y/n's face lightly while staring at her lips. "Can I give you a kiss?" 

As soon as the young lady nodded in reply, Touya immediately attacked her lips— giving her a heated and intense makeout session. Y/n glanced to the side to see if the door was locked— and gladly, it was. She swears to god, she'll immediately die if Yuta see them like this. It wasn't too soon until she focused on the beautiful person whose hands were roaming around her body— Touya. Y/n began playing with his hair while kissing back— as they both began to lay on the bed. His body was placed between her legs— which were spread as he was gently tracing circles on her thighs while still kissing her. 

Few more seconds, Touya pulled away from the kiss— only to see a flustered and panting Y/n; the sight was too cute— truly, only for his eyes to see. Her legs were spread while her lips were lightly parted. Her e/c eyes were also half-lidded while both of her hands were clenching on the sheets. No matter how much he tries to be soft and gentle, he always ends up being rough and feral. But tonight, Touya wants to give her the love that she deserves— the love that was taken away from her arms few years ago. 

"Damn, I didn't know this was you meant by kiss." Y/n chuckled as she lightly pinched his cheeks. 

Touya replied, looking down in embarrassment," Sorry. I couldn't help it."

"No. Don't be sorry." Y/n responded and gave him a warm hug. "I also want to feel you tonight, Touya." 

They continued making out— until Touya began living marks from her chest to her neck— rubbing his growing erection on the slit between her legs. Y/n let out small whimpers as he began touching her clit while his lips were sucking on her nipples. 

"A-ah... Touya." Y/n moaned as he continued to make her feel better with his hands and lips. 

In his thoughts, she deserves this after all. Touya knew that he should be compensating for all these years of absence. And this is just one of the ways he could express his gratitude— for raising Yuta well and for giving him a chance to be a better father and make up for all those years that he should have been there. 

Few seconds later, Y/n began to undress him— and he did the same. As she was lying naked on the bed, Touya began to insert a single digit inside her core— earning a light yelp from her. A small smirk appeared from his lips. Just, how much did he miss seeing her like this? He could feel her insides clenching as she began arching her back— but he took his fingers out, which earned a frustrated panting from her.

"You wanted to feel me, right?" Touya whispered lovingly, "I want you to cum on my dick, not on my fingers. Is that okay with you?"��

Y/n nodded in response as the red-haired male positioned himself in between her legs, slowly entering her tight insides; her voice letting out a loud gasp as she tightened her grip around his toned arms. Her eyes were closed— trying to ease herself from the pain. 

It's been years since she did this with someone. And now, it all feels new. But truly, Y/n appreciates Touya's desire to make her feel better. Moments later, when the discomfort on her face disappeared, Touya started to move— the speed of his thrusts slowly increasing every time he moves. The young lady could only let out light whimpers as her back began to arch— immediately cumming from the sensation.

"You came that easy," Touya planted a kiss on her lips. "But that's okay."

This was something new to Y/n. It's been so long since she had loving sex with Touya. During his past Dabi days, they would only have a loving session evert after fights— which rarely happens. Usually, it was quickies or rough sex. This was something unordinary— but the young lady liked this side of him. 

As Touya began to pick up his pace, he began to let out grunts— his grip slowly tightening. He pants, "I-I'm going to cum." 

Her soft thighs began to wrap around his waist tighter, bringing his body closer as he spurted his seed inside her tightening core. It was an amazing feeling for the both of them. The redhead immediately plopped himself on top of Y/n's body— inhaling the scent of the tired woman who pecked his forehead. 

"You can sleep here for tonight." Y/n stated as she was playing his hair with her soft hands as he was laying on the top of her chest.

"Totally," Touya let out an exhausted chuckle in reply. "I'd love that." 

The both of them lay in each others' arms that night— making up for the years of being separated. Things weren't surely easy for the both of them. Y/n and Touya faced the hardships that the world has to offer as individuals; but as soon as they felt the warmth of each others' arms, they knew that everything was designed; and that every obstacle that they went through— were all worth it.

Taglist [OPEN]: @babayaga67​ @marydragneell @xxtrash-kingxx @paranoiac-666 @velvet-kissesss @orenjineki @mermaid-starlet @ikita454 @yo-girl-lunar @pansexual-booknerd @daimiyu @marvelousbakugou @peculiarinsomniac @cutesnakemum @sam-i-am-1025 @lawlesshedgehog @sonderkook @miss-buttersworth @threbony @noonewouldlisten25 @missalicebaskerville

A/N: vanilla secks w touya/dabi should be a thing in the fandom :<< 

[ghoularts]

Let’s talk about the future chapters and fates of some characters!

Oh boy so this is gonna be a long ass post but I just wanted to discuss things about the ‘war arc’!

First, I’ll start off with Hawks/Keigo Takami.

Status: Unconscious/Severely burned, escaped to the forest away from the mansion

Hawks has become quite the controversial character in the fandom. It’s up to the reader to decide whether they believe his actions was right or wrong. There is no correct/clear answer here. I won’t dive into any of that right now, instead I’m going to focus on what his arc holds in the future.

Since he hit his head on the concrete, he was knocked unconscious and could possibly go into a coma. (Because we know Horikoshi likes to drag things out when it comes to the possibility of Dabi being Touya.)

I do not believe Keigo will die. Especially now that he holds important information about Dabi. We also don’t know Keigo’s whole backstory yet nor do we know what really happened with Jeanist. The recorder he had got burned up with his jacket or was destroyed by Dabi in this panel:

You can see a little piece go flying from his hand just above his staples.

What I do believe is Hawks will die. His hero persona. Now that his wings are gone, the Hero Commission will most likely drop him just like that. Keigo will live on with the guilt of killing Twice. He really wanted to save Twice, trying to get him to surrender, only aiming to incompacitate him until, well... you know.

When Dabi calls him dirty, he doesn’t deny it. It’s probably going to impact him a lot when all this is over. The best direction for him is to have a talk with Tokoyami about his actions and break away from the HPSC. He should expose them since they groomed him as a child into a weapon, sent kids into a war, etc.

Personally, I’d love for Keigo to become a vigilante. It suits him much better at this point. I don’t think he’ll be able to regrow/regenerate his wings. There’s nothing left, plus he could only regenerate the feathers when there were his little stubs left. Also if you remember Endeavor talking about his blue flames it makes sense; “Carbonized cells can’t regenerate.”

Next up we have Tokoyami!

Status: Alive, slightly burned, escaped to the forest away from the mansion

I’ve seen many posts about how Tokoyami was brainwashed. This is simply not the case. The Hero Commission seems to kind of despise UA or doesn’t have all to that much influence with the school. Except for the time they didn’t want the cultural festival to take place (at least that’s what I remember). Many of the teachers have their own thoughts about the Hero Commission such as Midnight in the teacher’s conference saying that the kids shouldn’t be put in battles like this. Aizawa has his suspicions about the organization as well.

Tokoyami respects his mentor because Hawks taught him many things about his Quirk and gave him good advice. (“If you’ve got wings, you should spread them out and fly. Don’t be confined to the ground.) Hawks means a lot to Tokoyami so of course he’d come to his rescue. When Dabi points out Twice’s body, Tokoyami looks horrified. When flying away and telling Hawks he did the right thing, he was running on emotions and shock. His mentor needs medical attention and fast. Caleb, a translator for the manga, notes that Tokoyami drops his edgy tone when he says these things to Hawks. Tokoyami is panicking. He just wants Hawks to be safe.

Also, his experience/interactions most likely play a role in his thinking. These villains tried to kidnap him, kidnapped a classmate, killed multiple people and plan to kill many more, and attacked his class on several occasions. Why would he believe Dabi right away when Dabi has burned alive dozens of people, thugs and innocent heroes like Snatch, and is trying to actively kill his mentor and Tokoyami himself?

Again, I think Hawks and Tokoyami will have a talk after this and Tokoyami will have to question Hawks’ actions. Keigo will probably tell him something along the lines of ‘Don’t support what I did’ or ‘Don’t follow in my footsteps.’ Call me crazy, but there’s actually the possibility that the HPSC will take notice of Tokoyami’s power and the risks he took to save Keigo. They might offer him training to be a ‘special hero’ like Keigo was. 

Miruko!

Status: Missing arm/part of leg, bleeding severely, in Jakku Hospital

Oh man where we last left off with the rabbit queen herself was her bleeding on the floor out of energy. Endeavor cauterized her wounds so at least it stopped most of the bleeding. It is worrying to know that she’s still in the hospital when Shigaraki is about to wake up and destroy everything. 

Though I don’t think she’s going to die. Especially since that color page showed mechanical limbs in the same spot where she lost them. Horikoshi also loves drawing her, so let’s hope he likes drawing her enough to keep her alive lol. She’ll probably be in recovery for a while before resuming her hero work with her new prosthetic limbs. 

Endeavor

Status: Alive, in Jakku Hospital

Endeavor was taking on Nomu with Ryukyu in chapter 269. He is also in range of Shigaraki being in the hospital with all the other heroes. Many people believe he has huge death flags, but I seriously don’t think he’ll die this arc until we know what happened with Touya. Hawks might ask him about Touya if the black speech bubble was Dabi saying that he’s Endeavor’s son. This will both crush Keigo’s admiration for the flame hero and make Endeavor realize just how badly his abusive behavior affected his family. Perhaps he’ll go public with it? Or maybe the villains will use it against Endeavor one day and the public will turn on him? 

Gigantomachia/Kirishima/Ashido

Gigantomachia is truly terrifying. He could wipe the floor and completely wreck the heroes. He has finally stood up and will be on the move, heading in Shigaraki’s direction because of his ‘Master’s Scent.’ Since Shiggy now possesses All for One, Giganto will follow his orders.

What’s even scarier is that this guy was introduced way back in Kirishima’s and Ashido’s backstory. Which means those two could possibly face this giant. Kirishima wouldn’t be able to make a dent, but Ashido could wear him down over time with the exposure to acid. I’ve also seen theories floating around about him being Crimson Riot. So Kiri facing his idol?

I’ll touch more on other characters later (Deku, Shiggy, Dabi, Mic, Aizawa, Kaminari etc.) but I’ll tell you guys which characters I think will die:

Xless (I mean, come on, Shiggy’s gonna kill this man)

Crust (we have no attachment to him, plus he hasn’t been fairing well with the Nomu. Not to mention he’s near Shigaraki as well)

Anyways, what do you guys think? Have anything to add like other potential outcomes of their arcs?

[katsukis-sad-angel]

A Chef’s Touch

Dabi x Fem!Chef!Reader Headcanons

Warnings: Dabi being an idiot, cursing, i think a dick is mentioned once

Dabi is used to coming home to a dilapidated apartment, nothing but ramen and Pepsi in his pantry, and using vodka and band-aids to piece himself together after a rough day

Living in your apartment, new dishes every day for him to enjoy, and your agile fingers there to patch him up was definitely an upgrade

Kitchens are very accepting places so you’re used to people of all sizes, shapes, colors, and genders with all types of piercings, tattoos, hairstyles, and scars under one roof, making you an excellent match for Dabi

Pierced to the dick and skin covered in nasty purple scars and shiny silver staples, your boyfriend/fiance/husband is no different than the people you’ve had the pleasure meeting throughout your career

Do you have tats? Badass. Since tattoos don’t show up well on scar tissue, he praises you for braving the needle, and won’t hesitate to kiss them for no reason

Thanks to you, Dabi learns that vegetables don’t actually taste like shit as long as you’re the one who made them

The smell of a home-cooked meal instead of the sickly whirr of a dented microwave is really comforting to him after a long day of villainy

He enjoys watching you cook almost as much as eating the end result

The way you move around the triangle, chop things at lightning speed, season things to perfection, beat the shit out of a slab of beef, and whisk ingredients together turns him on is really fascinating

Although he doesn’t exactly like the fact that you work in a giant room of mostly men, he’s not gonna stop you from doing what you love

He knows he’s got god-level dick game compared to any of those assholes you work with

Dabi/Touya the Food Snatcher: Comes up behind you, wraps his arms around your waist innocently, and then snatches a piece or chunk of something you’re making (especially when you make desserts)

The dangers of raw eggs don’t affect him

One time, while you were sauteeing onions and bell peppers in a skillet, your boyfriend sneaks up behind you, ready to strike

“Dabi. It’s hot.”

Ignoring your warning, Dabi shot out his hand and caught a carmelized onion between your finger and thumb, tossing the treat into his awaiting mouth

It took him about 4 seconds to realize his fatal mistake, spit the scorching onion into the sink after screeching the word:

“HOT!”

You hardly move as he bolted to the fridge and filled his mouth with ice cubes

Plopping down in a stool at your counter, he crossed his arms and pouted, freezing water dribbling onto his shirt from his overstuffed mouth

You had warned him

“I don’t know what you were expecting, babe.” You sigh, walking toward him while forcing down an amused smirk, “I warned you, dummy.”

Dabi slurped grossly at his chilly mouthful, preventing any more drool or water from wetting his shirt. “Thove ossh. I wath hungy.” He jabbered, turning his head defensively.

*Shove off. I was hungry

“I guess you should be more patient and you won’t have to get your tongue fried. Honestly, how many times does this have to happen before you learn that things in a pan are hot?”

Teach him to cook!

Cook food for him to take to the league! I mean, he’ll probably end up crouching in an alley, minutes from an important meeting, and eat it all because he doesn’t like sharing, but that’s just a theory

@seiiblue​ @bean-queen-606​

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 291: The Endeavor Pamphlet

Previously on BnHA: Dabi showed up atop Gigantomachia’s back and was all “you’ll never guess who I really am!” and the readers humored him and were all “who?” and he was all “TODOROKI TOUYA” and we were all “WOW └(・。・)┘ OH MY GOSH I WOULD NEVER HAVE GUESSED”, except for Shouto and Enji who were GENUINELY SHOCKED. Anyway so Touya was all “and guess what I’m doing right now!” and before anyone could even try, he was all, “STREAMING MY EMMY-NOMINATED MINISERIES ‘HELLO, I’M EVIL BUT ALSO TRAGIC AND SEXY, NOW LET ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT MY DAD WHO SUCKS’’, THAT’S WHAT.” And everyone was all “oh my god” and Touya was all “ヽ(⌐■_■)ノ♪” for basically the rest of the chapter, and that’s pretty much it! Oh, wait, except for the part where he also doused himself in bleach in a fit of pure theatrics, which is actually pretty much the main takeaway from the entire chapter really because it was just wild af. ANYWAYS.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi introduces Baby Touya, the world’s most enchantingly sweet character, and is immediately all, “I sure can’t wait to tell you guys all about how his fucking jaw burnt off.” Thankfully he doesn’t (YET), and we cut back to the present pretty quickly, where Dabi explains how he took all of his brain cells that should have been used to stop him from pouring bleach over his head, and instead put them all toward his big brain plot of releasing an elaborate video detailing Endeavor’s various abuses and crimes, and even throwing Hawks under the bus as well because WHY NOT. He then leaps off of Gigantomachia’s back (like I said, no brain cells) all set to blast them with a Prominence Burn, only to be stopped by none other than THE LEGEND HIMSELF, MOTHERFUCKING BEST, PRETTIEST, NICEST, MOST OUTSTANDING MOTHERFUCKING JEANIST. Who’s no doubt outraged by the crime against hair he witnessed only moments earlier. GO GETTIM JEANY BOI.

so I haven’t had time to answer any of them because this has been the stupidest week, but I just wanted to tell you guys that I received no fewer than nine asks about Dabi’s hair. which, in a week filled with election memes and tumblr’s most cursed fandom briefly rising back up from the dead, is a pretty impressive feat for him if you ask me. like, I know I was making fun of it basically nonstop, but it sure did generate a lot of discussion so maybe I should rethink my opinions on Dabi’s PR strategies now, idk

anyway. it’s Saturday. time to catch up on this shit. let’s see how fucked the Todorokis are

OH NO HE’S CUTE

HOLY SHIT THIS IS TOO MUCH TO FUCKING PROCESS. I’M JUST TRYING TO ENJOY MY DAY HORIKOSHI, ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO TRAUMATIZE THIS POOR CHILD RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY SALAD

“thanks for being all right” the fuck

who allowed this child to be so cute. I’m serious. who signed off on this

how could a child this adorable possibly want to murder his equally adorable baby brother. please, your honor. there must be some mistake here

guess how prepared I am to read all about Touya’s tragic past. mm. that’s right. zero ready. none ready

anyway. TWO THOUSAND DEGREES LOLOLOL. NO TRACE OF A CORPSE HOW CONVENIENT. A PIECE OF HIS LOWER JAW BONE FFFFMSGHKLSh. LOVELY. LOVELY

LMAOOOOO

listen you guys. I just want to take a moment to appreciate that Horikoshi Kouhei did one of two things here. either (1) he planned it out FROM THE VERY START that Touya would be born with red hair Because Fire Powers, but would then have his hair turn white due to trauma, thus making the Dabi/Touya connection very slightly less obvious, although Let’s Be Real Who Are We Kidding. OR, (2) the anime got it wrong and gave him red hair, and rather than allowing this plot hole to continue to exist, Horikoshi took it upon himself to concoct this elaborate storyline and pretend it was never a plot hole at all! in which case I sure hope someone at Bones is sending him a VERY nice Christmas card this year. got this man sweeping up all your messes for you. you’re just lucky he has some sort of wild compulsion to address these things

anyways!!

FATHER AND SON. how sweet. :| still zero percent ready for any of this btw

STOP BEING CUTE

THIS IS RIDICULOUS. I’M SO MAD RIGHT NOW. HE IS THE SINGLE CUTEST CHARACTER IN THE ENTIRE SERIES, and do you even know how many other baby characters I’m betraying in order to say that?! baby Kacchan, baby Deku, baby Ochako, baby Shouto, Eri, baby Hawks. I’M LOOKING YOU DEAD IN THE EYE RIGHT NOW AND TELLING YOU THAT BABY TOUYA IS CUTER THAN ALL OF THOSE PLEBS. AND YOU’RE LOOKING BACK AT ME RIGHT NOW ALL “YEAH IT SURE IS A PITY ABOUT HIS JAW MELTING OFF THOUGH.” THAT’S IT, I QUIT THE SERIES

and Enji’s smiling at him. he’s so proud of him. but then Touya won’t be able to do it, and Enji’s gonna stop training him, and Touya’s gonna feel like a failure and keep pushing himself in order to try and win his dad’s affections back, because that’s all kids fucking want, all they want is just love, that’s fucking it, you couldn’t just give him that?? and then he’s gonna immolate himself fflkdlskfh THERE YOU SEE HORIKOSHI, I KNOW THE WHOLE STORY ALREADY, YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO THE WHOLE “SHOW THEM THE DEAD DOG” THING YET AGAIN YOU PIECE OF SHIT

OH SNAP THERE GOES THE TWIN THEORY. R.I.P.

BABY FUYUMI. PRETTY CUTE. NOT AS CUTE AS TOUYA THOUGH. HEY LOOK, NO REASON TO GET MAD AT ME I’M JUST STATING A FACT HERE

YEAH THIS IS GONNA GO REAL WELL OH BOY

I keep pressing the emergency stop button but this industrial tragedy machine just keeps on chugging along anyway, I’m pretty sure this thing is not up to code

:| I am so sorry sweet boy, Horikoshi is only getting started with you

FUCKING HELL WITH THIS NARRATION

but he wasn’t actually a child to you, he was just a little puppet child for you to live vicariously through!! and then you went and did the same fucking thing with Shouto afterwards and never learned your lesson until just six months ago!! fucking hell, Enji

so now he’s all “Touya is dead, that’s an unforgivable lie” fflkdhflk motherfucker does he look dead to you. if you really think that, tumblr and twitter have got a little over five years’ worth of archived theory posts to show you

oh shit Touya’s countering with “it’s an unforgivable truth”, which, damn. I actually think Horikoshi’s dialogue is one of his weaker points as a writer a lot of the time, but that comeback was snappy as fuck

actually guys, now that I’ve seen how ridiculously fucking cute baby!Touya was, I can almost understand why Shouto and Enji never put the pieces together before lol. any passing similarities would have easily been dismissed on account of he’d need to be at least 10x more adorable in order to get the full resemblance

OH MY GOD

NOW YOU SLEEP??? SO YOU POINT BLANK REFUSED TO PASS OUT WHILE YOU WERE BUSY MAIMING ALL OF MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS, BUT NOW THAT THERE’S AN OPPORTUNITY TO SEE YOUR REACTION TO THE “YOUR LIEUTENANT WAS SECRETLY RELATED TO ONE OF YOUR WORST ENEMIES THE WHOLE TIME” BOMBSHELL, YOU FINALLY DECIDE TO GET YOUR FORTY WINKS. I SEE

WOW DABI

I’M SURPRISED YOU DIDN’T ALREADY HAVE YOUR ANCESTRY.COM RESULTS PRINTOUT READY TO FOLD INTO A PAPER AIRPLANE AND ZOOM ON DOWN TO HIM

LOL NEVERMIND

gotta say, so far The Endeavor Pamphlet is just about as spicy as I could have hoped

(ETA: Natsuo’s face as he watches his beloved dead brother come back to life only to literally and metaphorically set everything on fire in one fell swoop is :/. why must you do this to me Natsu. can’t you see I’m trying to throw a Welcome Back Jeanist party here.)

HAVE YOU READ THIS?! TODOROKI ENJI ABUSED HIS OWN HEIR, AND DABI WROTE IT DOWN RIGHT THERE

WELL HE’S NEVER GON’ BE NUMBER ONE NOW / NEVER GON’ BE NUMBER ONE NOW / THAT’S ONE LESS THING TO WORRY ABOUT / THAT’S ONE LESS THING TO WORRY ABOUT

btw I neglected to mention this last week, but yes I do recognize and appreciate that this is Can’t Ya See-kun himself whom Horikoshi has chosen to be the face of this existential crisis which the general public is about to experience. rip CYS-kun

OOF

excuse me. putting aside the implications of Dabi sharing this context-less murder video of Hawks with the entire world for a moment, I just have to pause for a sec here, because when exactly did he get a chance to edit this all in?? complete with voiceover that seamlessly ties in with the prerecorded footage of him with DNA test results sans shirt?? you’re telling me this motherfucker, with all the smoke that was in the room thanks to his own quirk, somehow got a PERFECT SHOT of the PRECISE MOMENT when Hawks drove his feather knife into Jin’s back, using his MAGIC CAMERA THAT HE I GUESS HAD THE ENTIRE TIME IN THE POUCH RIGHT NEXT TO HIS BLEACH BOTTLE, and then immediately somehow got this very next shot as well FROM AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT ANGLE

ALL THE WHILE IMMEDIATELY RUNNING THROUGH SCRIPT REVISIONS IN HIS HEAD, WHICH HE THEN PROCEEDED TO RECORD... WHERE, EXACTLY?? WITH SKEPTIC, WHILST RIDING ON MACHIA’S BACK??

AND THIS IS ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF???

and this after I just wrote that whole long paragraph positively GLOWING about this man’s ability to plug up a plot hole. jfc. just scratch out every damn word I said lol. just forget all of it

are you fucking kidding me, the footage was from the cameras Skeptic planted on Hawks??

that’s... actually... okay you know what, it still doesn’t make any sense in the slightest, but the determination to address it nonetheless... just, dammit... I feel like I’m constantly at war with myself over whether or not I want to shake this man’s hand or slap him lmao. whatever, then!!

anyway, since Shouto and Enji can’t actually see the damage that Touya is dealing to the hero industry even as they speak, Touya is taking it upon himself to give them the highlights

I think it’s a testament to how much Endeavor cares about Hawks that he managed to zero in on that comment even amidst all the craziness of his eldest son returning from the dead to announce how he’s been carefully plotting their destruction for years and years. like, he heard “Hawks” and his face immediately went like that. you think he’s worried that Dabi did something to him? because he’d be right to worry lol

so the Endeavor Pamphlet narration is now explaining all about how Hawks totally killed the Number 3 Hero Best Jeanist as well! yep... he sure did... totally...

OH MY GOD WE’RE CUTTING TO HIM AHHHHH

Hawks, that is. lol. not Jeanist. NO, JUST MY POOR HALF-DEAD WINGLESS BABY SON

NOOOOO HIS LITTLE WING STUMPS. BUT SOMEHOW HIS FACIAL HAIR IS STILL INTACT. OH TO BE AN ANIME PRETTY BOY BEING SET ON FIRE. “HEY, TAKE IT EASY, WATCH THE FACE”

EXCUSE ME WHAT

interesting! we suspected as much, I think, with the clues that Ending dropped, and the little flashback right after the name reveal. still not clear how Dabi found out about it though!

looooool okay here we go, breaking out the heavy-handed holier-than-thou shit now

you know, I do find it interesting how trying to model themselves after All Might’s noble Symbol of Peace image has kind of ended up being the heroes’ undoing here. like, I could write a whole essay on this, but what it basically boils down to is that they were all trying too hard to be perfect. All Might went out there and did his thing and was amazing, and so the powers-that-be built an entire system centered around this seemingly-infallible person, and they acted like the system was infallible as well. and so most of the population ended up becoming complacent over the years, and meanwhile the people who were unfortunate enough to fall through the cracks understandably wound up disillusioned and perceiving the heroes as these false idols

anyway, but I think one positive takeaway from this is that the new up-and-coming generation of heroes represent a breakaway from that system. like, imo what we’re witnessing is the downfall of the Perfect Hero, and the rise of the imperfect hero. and this new generation doesn’t shy away from their failures or pretend like they never happened. they pretty much can’t pretend, because their failures are all right out there in the open for everyone to see. Bakugou Katsuki, just to name one example off the top of my very biased head, has had his own personal character journey basically play out right in front of the media’s eyes. his humiliation at the sports festival, his kidnapping by the League, and all of the fallout afterward. this isn’t someone who can ever go out there and convince the world that he’s perfect. but what he can do, instead, is show the world that he’s trying. that he’s trying with everything he has to do his best, to be the best. rather than this untouchable godlike image, it’s instead the image of someone painfully human who is nonetheless striving with everything he’s got to keep moving forward, flaws and all, and work his way to the top

and ultimately I think that’s going to be a much more positive image to send out to the world when all’s said and done. because rather than merely inspiring awe, heroes like that inspire people to take action themselves. or at least that’s what I hope! and not just Bakugou, but the others as well. we’ve got Shouto, whose own personal trauma is being aired in front of the whole nation even as I sit here ranting. we’ve got Deku, who cries at the drop of a hat, and who fought to become a hero despite being quirkless (and I think it’s only a matter of time before that eventually becomes public knowledge as well). tl;dr because I’m getting way too long-winded here, but these kids have effectively been humanized in a way that the old generation never was, and I think that’ll go a long way towards building trust between them and the people they’ll someday be protecting, and inspiring the next generation in hopefully a much healthier way

anyway so where were we. ...oh yes, Dabi was explaining that heroes only protect themselves, and is presumably building up to his grand conclusion of “therefore you should all just let the villains take over and burn down the world”

omfg. YOU GUYS

DOES CAN’T YA SEE-KUN’S SHARK FRIEND ACTUALLY CALL HIM “CAN’T YA SEE-KUN.” HE HAS A NAME YOU KNOW!! UNLESS HE LEGALLY GOT HIS NAME CHANGED TO CAN’T YA SEE-KUN. OH MY GOD

ALSO, IS THAT CAN’T YA SEE-KUN CRYING IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT THERE OMG. GIVE THIS CHILD A HUG. EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING RIGHT NOW AND HUG HIM

BAKUGOU IS BARELY HANGING ON THERE LOL. GOTTA STAY CONSCIOUS... SO MUCH TEA BEING SPILLED... FOCUS... CONCENTRATE

IIDA’S ANGLING HIS HEAD IN A WEIRD WAY, LIKE DUDE. LOOKING SUSPICIOUSLY SNUGGLY THERE. MMM THESE IIDABAKU CRUMBS

HADOU IS ALL “WHAT EVEN IS ACTUALLY GOING ON” LMAO

LASTLY, POOR SHOUTO OMFG. WHEN YOU’RE ALL FINISHED HUGGING CYS-KUN THIS CHILD NEEDS YOUR ATTENTION!!

so now Dabi’s leaping off of this ninety-foot-tall gargoyle man like that’s a normal, smart thing to do. unless he can fly too now? saw his dad doing it back at Fukuoka and was all “hmm”

OH MY GOD SOMEONE TELL ME RIGHT NOW WHAT WORD SHOUTO IS USING TO ADDRESS ENJI, THESE TRANSLATIONS LOVE TO MESS WITH MY HEAD

ENJI GET MOVING DO YOU NOT SEE THOSE TEARS!!! SNAP OUT OF IT YOU BIG TREE

AHHHHH

OH KACCHAN YOU WOKE UP A LITTLE MORE THERE, HUH

lol he and Deku both look so determined but they’re basically sitting ducks. their “oh shit” faces do look remarkably like their “TIME TO SWING INTO ACTION” faces but don’t be fooled, they have one good arm and about six pints of blood left between the two of them. looks like this one’s all on you Shouto

-- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH --

BAH GOD... WHAT’S GOING ON HERE... THAT’S BEST JEANIST’S MUSIC

y’all. can’t even talk right now, my brain has completely shut down lol. just. ...

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