#hard to explain!
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hmmmm just messing with color paletes and brushes it's just what i do when i feel like im getting too comfortable in art other ppl like consistency and i just... dont i get so fussy and overthink! this kinda raw messing around helps to sooth the brain worms
#i promise that im still very obsessed with welcome home and im drawing eddie rn!!#just i start seeing the same lines and shapes and its driving me crazy!#hard to explain!#jazzdoodles#abstract#i like the first one tho
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i don't really like when people say dungeon meshi is accidentally good autistic representation, because while i understand not wanting to make conclusions without explicit confirmation from the author, there's always the weird assumption that non-western authors somehow don't know about things like neurodivergency/queerness/etc. (on top of the assumptions that east asian authors are somehow more naive or oblivious to "western" social issues).
given that dungeon meshi started being published in 2014, it's not really a "work belonging to its times"—it's as contemporary as any other media we discuss on this site, which means it should be fair to assume it engages with contemporary topics (and at the very least, you shouldn't say that the representation is accidental with so much confidence)
but anyways, the chapter "perfect communication" in ryoko kui's "terrarium in a drawer" is some of the most straightforward autistic representation I've seen, and from now on I'm going to assume that laios's character writing is absolutely intentional in that regard:
#beepbeep.txt#dungeon meshi#ryoko kui#this is me trying to explain h/ollow knight lore#also yayyyy reading new things. chapter 18 'spring' is basically UFUT if you squint (sorry for the jumpscare if you know UFUT)#but the last two pages were such a surprising gut punch....it's hard not to see it as a metaphor for both the experience of raising childre#and of taking care of your parents in old age....aughh....
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"Do you want a boyfriend/girlfriend?" no i want a best friend/roommate/soulmate that I can go on silly adventures with and hang out with and have deep intellectual discussions with and we can be life partners without any of the romance stuff
#its so hard trying to explain this to other people so maybe the aspec community gets it?#john watson#sherlock holmes#sherlock holmes/john watson#aroacespec#aroace#aromantic#asexual#acespec#arospec#queerplatonic relationship#qpr positivity#qpr#queerplatonic#1k#5k#10k
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I love blocking people I've never interacted with based off their replies on some random popular post. Wow random user on a post with 50k notes with the worst take ever, I hope I never meet you and will make sure we never do
#context: user was complaining about letting 'bad writing' pass#you need to let people write badly#you need to know that what you think it horrible is someone's creation they worked hard on and care about#and i dont know how to explain to you that you need to have empathy towards people#your cruelty towards others is a visible public display and a blockable offense#sara shush
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i have neither a good imagination nor aphantasia, but a secret third thing
#adhd#doodles#show this to your therapist instead of failing to explain it like i did#me: its like i cant control my thoughts like i was trying to think of something earlier today but#all i could think of was this giraffe eating leaves and no matter how hard i tried to focus the thought would just. replay#my therapist: what happens if you try to let the thought just play out#me: ........ i dont know but i dont want it to be there at all when im trying to do simple addition in a maths exam#10k#100k
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LGBTQ+ folk what was your gender/sexuality pipeline?
#For me it was#Cis AroAce -> Cis Biromantic Ace -> Cis Bisexual -> Questioning Bisexual -> Genderfluid Bisexual#Technically still Aspec as I'm Placiosexual as well but people get too confused when I try to explain that#Idk in general my sexuality is really all over the place so its hard to completely set one label for it#also currently wondering if I might be Demiromantic#lgbtq community#lgbtqia#queer#transgender#transfem#transmasc#genderfluid#gender#genderqueer#nonbinary#bisexual#gay#lgbt#questioning#asexual#aroace#aspec#aromantic#demisexual#lesbian
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Made so mucb preogress with the picrew...
#dead to world.. pain... back hurts.. cramps... kinda tired...#and yet it is. so so much fun. and i wanna continue so bad.#oh fuck i judt remembers that i have a project due on wednesday to make a storybook and some turnarounds#i love how easily i shove zampanio into all that i see nowadays#need to make an essay? make it avout zampanio! need to make a story? zampanio awaits! need to do anything in creative writing?#zampanio.#anything in animation?#zampanio!!#it makes it a lot more fun. i actuay want to do things when it involves that i guess!#hard to explain!#so sorry to my math teacher whos whiteboard i keep writing+drawing on with zampaniostuff. it will happen again.#i really love this schedule#im a little scared im going to be knocked out of it because of school#i am. enjoying this little routine ice shoved myself into#i dont remember anything from last week however! hrm#hhrnnnnmmmm#sigh#my back hurts so bad#hugs my electronics. ohh how i love you. the voice youve given me the way youve changed me. kiss kiss#the people youve let me meet and the wonderful things ive seen#i love you electronics.. i love the sounds and lights you give......#so many times i hug phone to sleep. it is cute litttle box that emits lightm how could i not.#its sad that computers are thinner nowadays makes them harder to hug#but on the plus side so very easy to pick up!#you know cuddling up into a plush pile with your favorite ill electronics or objects is so nice :-)#i think i have a broken computer part in my zampanio box and i dont know whether to consider it an eye or part of brain
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It can't be overstated how powerful the catharsis is when a scene of a character connecting with their wounded inner child is done right. The key poses...the expressions...the timing...storytelling like this can help to provide some healing for so many people in the audience.
#(hear it from me as a former therapist --)#I basically have had many sessions with clients where it's WAY easier to visually show them what inner child work is like#rather than verbally trying to break down the concept and explain it to them in mere words#if you show them visually it hits the subconscious right away. bypasses the conscious mind and cold logic#to show this in the form of art drives the concept home that much more#that's why we need stories about healing done right#the How to Connect Lovingly part is soooo hard to do honestly (speaking from my own personal experiences too)#it's so easy to keep loathing your wounded inner kid and finding him/her/them pathetic#arcane spoilers#arcane s2#jinx arcane#isha arcane#arcane#literally like...now that I have seen this scene I want to dig up the old photo of smol me that I used in my own therapy --#to connect with my own horribly traumatized inner kid
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even 2 years ago people still said autism with a whisper. it was also how people sometimes whisper lesbian, like they're afraid of uttering a slur. autistic was either an insult or it was something terrible, a horrible burden only select people endure. "select people" were usually 9 year old boys and skinny white men.
they are not hispanic young adults with a dog and a life and friends. i can make (sustained, calculated, painful) eye contact. with certain people, i don't even have to count how many seconds i am holding their vision - i can just look at them. i can wear clothes that bother me, i will just have a worse day than usual. i might cry about any changes to my schedule - but change is scary! this is normal!
when i was 16 it was OCD. i mean that was the thing everyone said. i totally have ocd. they would arrange 6 colors of gel pen in rainbow order (no worry for indigo feeling left out) and they'd be "so ocd" about it.
if you struggle with intrusive thoughts, be careful at this next paragraph, but. at 16 i developed a compulsion that involved self-harm. my ocd was convinced i was simply forgetting that i'd hurt someone terribly - a thought that persisted for no clear or delineated reason.
at some point i will probably write about how the idea of "morally pure thoughts" was hell for me and others with ocd, but this was the odd dichotomy for many of us: they liked our "aesthetic", but were genuinely repulsed by our lived experience. "intrusive thoughts" now means "cutting your hair in the sink" instead of talking yourself down from believing horrible things. "so ocd" is a label without any true understanding.
it's something i've talked about before - in multiplicity - but i firmly believe in the veracity and necessity of self-diagnosis. i think it saves lives and it saves tragedies from occurring. as someone raised in a house that wasn't safe, self-diagnosis was, for many years, the only viable option. 15 and honestly googling: am i depressed or are there demons affecting my behavior.
but it is not genuine self-diagnosis anymore, most of the time. it is a strange, blanched version of that whispered word autism. now certain traits are constantly seen as "autistic" - any passing intense interest. any flubbed social interaction. people say it while laughing - a touch of the 'tism.
and i like the acceptance! i do. i like that people are talking about it. i like that if i self-identify, more people speak up and say me too, bitch. but there is something-else quietly happening, the way it happened to OCD. the quirky, "fun" parts have been washed and sanitized and removed of all suffering. now it is just something that makes you "a little bit silly."
it took me 27 years on this planet before i learned to make friends. something about me just seems incredibly odd, i guess, some kind of radiation monitoring. someone once (in a way that was almost friendly) told me i am doing the right things, but in a way that's off-putting. i have scoured myself raw attempting to be charming.
someone on tiktok does a deep dive into their particular passion. the top comment says "what kind of autism is this lol". like we are a breed of animal. like it has no influence on our experience. like our life is a fresh breeze, an open meadow.
more often for me, life was a drowning.
#warm up#spilled ink#writeblr#it's hard to explain bc i do like the acceptance but it's like the ocd thing#autism is . an entire neurotype. yes we get 'cool autism powers' but we mostly say that#for OUR sake. on the autism website.#the cool autism powers do come with like. quality of life problems.#girl being in a room with LEDs gives me a headache. so you can kind of imagine how that might#in some way#influence my ability to function#will defend self diagnosis to the death as long as it is CLEAR AND LEGITIMATE. not like.#oooo i struggle talking 2 women i must be autistic#girl what. i struggle with the act of TALKING.
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puppy kitty
#dog#cat#furry#animal#digital art#illustration#tattoo#pdx tattoo#first tattoos start in two weeks YAY#ill post an official update later (hard to explain but the school has schedule restraints making it difficult on my end)#BUT IF UR READING THIS & in/near pdx and are willing to let me practice on you in december please mssg me 😏
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Honrses
#theyre supposed to be used as war montures and also for transportation like irl horses but they are not shy or afraid#so like theyre really hard to tame idk theyre just concepts still#honestly looking at them now they seem too horse like i'll probably redesign them to look more bulky like a rhino#so my idea is that unicorns exist in my setting but they went extinct and these are part of the same genus but lack magic qualities#and instead theyre more about raw force and impaling stuff#i will add them to my bestiary so i'll explain better when its time#wgd#worldbuilding#horse art#art#my art#digital art#dark fantasy
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In short- the bugs of Hallownest did not take it well. Lots of screaming about "The end of the world" and "past sins coming back to haunt them". Elderbug almost had his second heart attack and basically every bug, other than the Pale King children and Quirrel, hid for several hours. (Zote likes to claim he was the first to make contact)
As for why Dewi's Dad is in Dirtmouth? Well, he wasn't very happy when his 11 year old son told him about going into a 'mysterious cave' to see his bug friends. Adult supervision and all that.
#Elderbug: “Guess I'll die”#Dewi is a lot less intimidating than his Dad. (Despite both looking like eldrich horrors to bugs) He's very gentle with his movements#Compared to his dad who has no idea how to handle bugs at all and is frankly terrified that they are crawling all over him#But man. Dewi idolizes his Dad so hard#The Old Stag is here and Also almost had a heart attack. But he likes Dewi and was curious enough to meet his Dad. <3 why not at this point#Hollow is not wanting to explain their first meeting with Dewi to his Dad. Despite being possessed by an evil moth she-demon.#hehe I loved drawing these guys. tho this took wayyyyy longer than it should have. Anatomy is HARD#dewi#dewi's adventures in Hollow Knight#my art#ask stuff
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Cheesy but I do not care
#this comic is just so hard to explain#its apart of my normies universe but like after they started dating? but its also SUPER ooc but at the same time not????#idfk but I cant post it on my comic blog cuz we're not at this point yet in the story#sonic#sonic the hedgehog#sth#sonic fanart#sonic au#shadow#shadow the hedgehog#sonadow#ack attack
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this one actually made me laugh pretty hard im not gonna lie
#morrowind#the elder scrolls#morrowind memes#tes iii#i cant explain it i just started laughing rly hard from everything else around it#idk if itll be as funny out of context
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part 2!!!! [read part one here]
transcript below the cut arranged into stanzas to help show where the rhymes are:
“that’s why they brought gem in? as a failsafe?” as a pawn. we were told to point her at whoever we need gone
“gem won’t hurt her allies. …yet.” the curse she carries will it’s had its eye on her since she lost the other eye she was specially selected for her hunting skill it’s quite the high honor. “wow. how generous.” we try
think about it: why does almost no one fight the curse? “given how fast scott killed skizz last season, i can guess.” [“any pain you spare your friends, you’ll have to suffer worse”?] it’s designed to shut down higher reasoning with stress
#if you still can't see the rhyme scheme try reading it out loud#if that doesn't work uh. idk. can't help you#my art#grian#geminitay#smajor1995#bdoubleo100#inthelittlewood#secret life#grian and his terrible horrible no good very bad eldritch coworkers: the sequel#cant wait to post the next part so i can be like 'my three secret life comics. and yes they all rhyme'#this one narratively doesn't work nearly as well as a standalone compared to part 1#however i accidentally went way too hard and could probably upload the middle page + second to last panel as their own separate art pieces#tbh i'm considering putting an explanation of everything below the readmore buuut i don't feel like it atm. :3 later maybe#me and my 20+ life series headcanons i only allude to without explicitly stating don't need to explain ourselves#still experimenting with this webtoon-esque vertical comic style#still not sure i like it#it gets long too quickly#among other things#but it's very easy to read on a phone so
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Can I interest you in............ Jarmulkes or perhaps........ Jippahs???
#jumblr#meme#personal thoughts tag#i'm trying so hard to understand the appeal of this i'm sorry but.#denim?????????#DENIM kippot?????#DENIM??#can somebody who wears these explain to me like i'm four#i promise this is all in good fun tho
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