#happy hour redmond

[intheshadowsbehindyou]

Spy X gn!Reader: Like A Wolf Among The Lambs

Warning: Mild NSFW

You could barely breathe as you treaded through the clearing, your lungs were starting to burn from the cold.

The snowy veil concealed the hiking trail back to the base. You pulled out a stopwatch given to you not that long ago to briefly check the time. As expected; it was only two hours until the sun would dip below the horizon. It was things like this that reminded you Miss Pauling was more of an adult than anyone you ever knew. Had she not thought of every single thing then the stopwatch she gave you — would have never alerted you that you only had mere hours.

The blanket of snow draped across the mountains was like something out of a storybook. Only the gentlest, softest strokes of paint would make up this landscape if ever realized upon a canvas. You did not hear one single animal on your way. Minus the occasional rustling of foolish bird species who decided against migration. Those birds were a problem for you, and for a good reason.

This was enemy territory. This was Redmond Mann’s side of the battlefield. The badlands weren’t the only things the two bothers found worth fighting for. Indeed, the gravel of the mountains somehow tickled their fancy as well. If you weren’t hyper alert of every single detail, or every sound, you could potentially come face to face with a fellow mercenary wearing opposite colored clothing.

Although you were wearing layers of blue clothes, you were still cold. The base was too far for comfort and your other hand held the Red intelligence by its handle. The red coloring stuck out like a sore thumb in the white snow. If they couldn’t hear you first then they will certainly see you. Finding no other option, you retreated to the nearest run down broken shelter. There were many mining facilities in the 1800s upon this mountain. Thus an incredible amount of run down structures. Most of which didn’t have anything of value. Maybe a few graffiti here and there from rambunctious kids.

You set down the briefcase, and pushed some loose wood panels aside with all your might to catch a glimpse of the inside and your lips immediately curled into a frown at the sight. It was with no doubt an abandoned summer home. What hid its identity so well on the outside was the thick branches of low trees surrounding it. Although ransacked, it was spacious and still had a ripped up painting on the wall of the nearby lake with lush green foliage. It was dusty and barely had any more of its once bright color that welcomed countless families. You hauled the heavy briefcase inside and your eyes went from left to right. Still feeling obnoxiously anxious over the fact you were intruding on enemy land. Atop of the lingering feeling that this depressing place was once alive with happy memories. It almost felt like you were desecrating a grave.

Whatever type of insulation this house used was no more. It would be proven useless after you saw the back door — or the lack of back door for that matter. All there was, was an empty frame of where the door should have been. A hole.

Much like the hole this house had where a family should have been. It was reduced to nothing because time was marching onward. For all you knew, the people of this household were nonexistent anymore and obscured by the forever thickening fog of history. You sat in the corner away from the breeze that blew through and took off your light backpack. Given that you were sent out to retrieve the intel while the other mercs played as distractions, the contents didn’t have anything heavy. All there was, was a few protein bars, a blanket, some candles, and god knows how much ammo.

You threw the blanket over your own head, and struggled to light the wick of your candle. This basic survival setup would suffice for a while. You’d rather die by oncoming gunfire than slowly from hypothermia.

You shoved the lit candle into the cracks of the floorboard just under you. Holding it until it finally decided to stand upright. You sighed, knowing full well that you wouldn’t be getting any sleep tonight. The risks were too high. If you built an actual fire you’d risk being seen, and if you went to sleep, you’d risk failing to detect someone coming across you in time.

You crossed your arms and stared at the candle. The heat from the fire was slowly warming up your little temporary blanket hut. A few minutes felt like hours. You could see through the outside of the blanket getting darker and darker as night approached. The light ceased and all that was left was your candle. You found yourself slowly nodding off a few times. Barely able to keep your eyes open.

Until….

Vvvvoooosshh…

No. That couldn’t be. Could it?

You jolted awake, covering your heavy breathing with your gloved hand. Every single nerve in your body was sounding off the alarm. Under normal circumstances you wouldn’t be so sensitive but this was different. You had the intelligence, and either you were going insane or you just heard the very distant noise of a spy decloaking.

Surely this was your tired mind drifting off into REM that played a trick on you, right? Nothing more than the cruel chemicals in your brain that had been trying to process the information of the day. For your own safety you decided it just shouldn’t be shrugged off. Had you been a little kid afraid of the dark then maybe things would have been different. But monsters under the bed were easy. They could be scoped out and properly taken care of. Fear of the unknown can be dealt with if you discover it. But this was Spy. Spy wasn’t somebody you could shine a light on and identify. He was every little child’s worst nightmare. A monster that could not be discovered. A faceless wolf in sheep’s clothing. Danger that hid itself by mimicking something else, camouflaging into the wall for example.

You felt heart palpitations kick in. Trying desperately to open your ears to every single noise in the room plus the outside. Your breathing was short, swaying branches created white noise you couldn’t hear over, and the candle fire danced unsteadily. Threatening to blow out. Part of you wanted to reach out of the blanket and grab the intel next to you but the rational half wondered if once your fingers met that handle — it would meet someone else’s fingers as well.

You heard the floor creak. It was a miracle you could hear it in the first place. Perhaps the sheer terror you felt had heightened your senses. Then another creak…

Then another..

Somebody was walking slowly in the spacious house. The realization hit you like a thousand bricks to the face. You were in a very noticeable corner of the living room and you began praying to whatever gods above that the intruder had bad eyesight or simply chalked you up to a useless piece of trash covered with some sort of tarp.

Thoughts of impending doom were peaking their ways through the cracks of your faltering hope as you heard two more creaks not too far spaced out from each other. As if the intruder was becoming more bold and ceasing his light footwork.

There was only one man you knew capable of carrying himself that lightly.

You suddenly came to your senses, realizing the candle was still lit. If he sees the light underneath the blanket then you were beyond muerto. You make a hasty and uncaulcated decision to blow the candle out. In mere milliseconds you realized your oversight too late. A swift hand lifted up the blanket the moment you did so, and you met eyes with who was undoubtedly the Red Spy. Even in the cold darkness you could make out his red attire. Which would soon be stained with yet another victim’s blood.

“Ever so bold with priceless information as always I see.” His accent was thick. But not in a pleasant way.

You swore you could’ve had a heart attack then and there. But you went into shock. Like your body somehow accepted and came to terms with it being the end. You could feel his butterfly knife’s blade barely grazing your adams apple. Threatening to cut you if you made any sudden movements. He carefully reached over and slid the intelligence to his side by its handle. Kicking it to the side where it wouldn’t be touched.

“I knew where you were the moment I walked in here. You’re worse than my counterpart. Luckily, I have respect for naive youth. Believe it or not.” Spy said, looking up and down you.

You were speechless. Your body couldn’t move. It was rather unsurprising that anybody younger than his weird definition of adulthood — which was undoubtedly old — would be considered apprentices in his eyes. You could almost make out his lip twitching into a smile. He was clearly enjoying the adrenaline he was shooting through you. Yes indeed; it would seem that Spy smelled fear.

He basked in the glory of your terror for a few more seconds before removing the melee from your neck. Spy hauled himself up from his crouching position and picked up the intel. Showing a surprising amount of strength to carry a briefcase of that weight.

“Take it from me, mercenary work is no profession for children.” He said, even know you were clearly an adult.

“Adieu.” He dusted his suit off and you watched him swiftly cloak away. Leaving faster than he came in. But not before rudely throwing the blanket back on your head.

To be honest, not only did you have to sit in silence after that, but you also had to rethink how horrible your tastes were in men. He had managed to make your heart flutter. In a good way. You decided to chalk it up to your stupid brain mistaking adrenaline for arousal.

[chromiumagellanic06]

The Silver Knight: Warrior, Princess, Wife

Daemon Targaryen/Original Fem [Targaryen] Character

Chapter 8: Three Answers

MASTERLIST

Summary: Naera prepares for Lady Tyrell's arrival in the capital and has an interesting family dinner. Daemon learns a little about her past.

Word count: 3.8k

Warnings: nothing, really

It was roses, roses all the way. On the beds, in the twenty vases laid out on the tables and floors, on the sheets, on the curtains, on the windows, on the very ceiling of the chambers. Everything was filled with roses.

Naera was plucking more roses from the gardens—red, pink, white, yellow, and more, and more, and every flower that resembled a rose at all, was plucked and dethorned and cut diagonally at the stem and dropped into water. There were twelve maidservants with her, all fetching flowers in haste, trying in vain to get her to leave the work to them and take another hour of rest.

Naera did not listen. Everything needed to be covered in the finest roses from the finest florists in the capital. Everything.

“I thought you didn’t like flowers,” Daemon watched her from the edges of the gardens, arms folded, teasing.

“They’re not for me,” Naera answered with a smile, fingers scabbing over from the thorn cuts. It wasn’t good for her, he knew, everyone knew, even the incompetent maesters, who had long ago given up any hope of coaxing the princess to rest. They had ordered a Kingsguard—but she always carried around that dagger he had gifted her. Ser Redmond would survive, surely. A stab to the neck shouldn’t perish such a respected Kingsguard.

“My prince,” Grandmaester Mellos began, hissing at the sight of blood roses in Naera’s hands as she continued her actions, “It is imperative that the princess rests. If you would be so kind, as to—”

“Are you asking me to use force on my lovely niece?” Daemon chuckled, “Get another Kingsguard.” He was enjoying this far too much. He only hoped that Crispin Cunt could be next—that would be amusing. Mellos grumbled his disdain and walked away, glaring at Naera as he left.

“How’s this one?” Naera held up a rose, yellowed and wrinkled with age, withering away, “Good enough for the chamber pot?” Daemon laughed, walking over to her and taking the rose from her hand. He glanced at it for a second, at the spider crawling within, and dropped it to the floor.

“I believe,” he took her scratched, bloody hands, “that is quite enough.”

“Oh, but uncle,” Naera giggled, eyes closed, “She hates roses—it shall be grand. The roses shall be everywhere.” Lady Elysabeth Tyrell, long befriended to Princess Naera, did, famously, hate roses. The lady always argued that anything rained without measure brings abhorrence to its once lover. It is her logic that a Targaryen can come to tire of fire, as a Stark can tire of winter, or a Lannister can tire of being wealthy, or roaring? It did not always hold up.

“Now,” Daemon spoke without thinking, “I believe that you should rest now. Lady Tyrell shan't be here for another day, at best,” and he cursed himself because he would have loved to see the Green Queen’s sworn guard beaten by a barely armed girl—and he knew that she’d win, irrespective. She was Visenya returned, surely, and yet there was no sign of her Vhagar, he twirled a black lock of hair on his finger, swirling the stained hair around his finger. “Any answers from Asshai?”

Naera wiped her hands on her dress, leaving behind carmine and soil-coloured streaks on the silk. “It shall take time by raven. Another week, perhaps,” but the wedding would be upon King’s Landing by then. She turned to the maidservants who had toiled for hours decorating the chambers of Lady Tyrell prior to her arrival at the behest of their Princess, and exhaustion was evident in their sweat-laden faces. Naera directed them, “Away, girls,” and turned to take her uncle’s arm.

The dozen young servant girls, who had probably been happy to receive a summons of service from the princess as close to her wedding, who had probably expected to help with ribbons and hair or jewels and wine, were probably glad to leave to tend to their arms.

“And our plan?” Daemon questioned, quietly.

“We begin.”

The streets of Pentos were loud with trade and bargaining, the occasional wail of a stolen slave and the laughter of rich merchants as they crush the dreams of common labourers. There were men, women, and the occasional children, in cyan blue for those with wealth, in greens and maroons for the middle folk, and dirtied yellows for the labourers and slaves. No, slavery had been long abolished in Pentos due to Braavos, but that had hardly stopped the practice in reality. The slaves were still branded with tears for whores, with hammers for builders and fish for fishermen. Among them, on occasion, is spotted a man or woman with flames drawn across their faces-the slave priests of the Red Temple, but they hardly appeared and hardly wore red. 

Amongst them all, between the labouring, harassing, cheating humanity stood a lone Red Woman.

Melisandre of Asshai stood by the ports in Pentos, as she had stood the day before, and the day before that, and the day before that, waiting. She was waiting for a ship bearing orange flags with a red sun pierced by a golden spear carrying the richest Dornish Red wine to ever grace the Free City of Pentos. It would also have something—someone a lot more valuable, whom she did not yet know.

She had sent a letter to her knight, a short note of tribute before her big day, to tell her love of the obligation of her position. She had seen in the flames a Targaryen rogue Prince in delight, and Melisandre knew where duty applied. 

Naera's duty would come soon, as her entire life, Melisandre had embraced her obligations. Once, it had been to spread her legs when she was still called by another name, and now, she would board that ship, in one way or another, and follow its way to King’s Landing, then row a boat across the Bay of Black waters and reach the ancestral home of the Targaryens. For now, she needed to tarry, even if it took days, if it took nights, if it took weeks and months. She would wait.

“I will win if we joust, my dear,” Daemon said with a scoff.

“How can you be sure, unless we try?” Naera argued.

Laenor was holding his laughter, lips pressed together painstakingly, as he averted others’ gaze. They heard themselves, he trusted, I shall not be the first to laugh. I shall not be the first to blush. I shall not be the first to laugh.

“We could, yes, but I wouldn’t want my dear niece injured and with Maester Mellos of all people on her wedding night,” and King Viserys cleared his throat, uncomfortable. Yes, surely, the thought of his brother fucking his daughter was a little disconcerting.

“Well, I wouldn’t want my sweet and bloodthirsty uncle injured on his wedding night either, but I want to joust,” and Aemond crinkled his nose above his soup, unable to tell if he witnessed love or late between his soon-to-be-wed half-sister and uncle, “and if he isn’t willing to indulge me, then—”

Daemon clicked his tongue, “Don’t be stubborn, it doesn’t become you,” and Aegon was being far too liberal with the wine for a boy of his age. Queen Alicent was staring across the table, counting his glasses, frequently putting the pitchers out of his reach to keep her, by all means, idiot son sane enough to behave.

“Oh, I could say the very same for you, could I not?” Jacerys was intrigued—his aunt was loud and brash, much like his grand-uncle, and he wondered why his mother wouldn’t let him speak to her outside of meals. He also wondered why she always chose the seat closest to his grandfather, the King, and besides his father, and never near him, and Luke, and Aegon, Aemond and Helaena, or Daeron and Joff.

“Fine,” Daemon yielded, taking a sip of Dornish Red from his soon-to-be lady wife’s glass, and added, “When you lose, limagon doar.”

Naera seized his glass of Arbour Red instead and scoffed, “Nyke gaomagon limagon daor, kepus,” I do not cry, uncle, but she was far too drunk, was she not? She had had far too many pitchers of far too strong wine and not nearly enough food to hold it down, and Naera felt giddy and ecstatic. She met his eyes across the table, narrowed and laughing, and revelling in how bothered every adult at the table was.

“Wine?” Aegon asked his uncle, already reaching for a decorated glass jug.

“None for me,” Daemon spoke breathily, and downed Naera’s glass to emptiness, and watched curiously as Alicent dragged the boy down before he could refill his own serving. “I must say, brother,” Daemon addressed Viserys, “These family dinners are proving very entertaining, indeed.”

Naera pushed around the maybe dozen peas on her plate. Where had the rest gone? She had had at least double this many, and could not recall chewing them. Huh, but she brushed it off. She filled herself another wineglass, and chose only Dornish Arbour, perhaps out of sentimentality, or perhaps because every other wine tasted vaguely of pig piss, and she filled her glass halfway only, for the sake of etiquette, as well as her shaking hands.

All playful mischief drained his face, and some inkling of concern took its place. He reached his hand across the table, past the rich meats and soups and wines, “Now, now,” Daemon took her glass before it touched her lips, “That’s quite enough,” and made sure to curl his fingers around her blackened curls that gathered around her face and tucking the bunch behind her ear. Laenor stared down at his food uncomfortably, still not the first to get uncomfortable, and doing it well, for his sake, but almost let his laughter loose at the clear agony on Queen Alicent’s face when Daemon handed Aegon Naera’s glass.

Sure, a drunkard prince being fourth in line to the Iron Throne wasn’t anything unusual, but from the Green Queen’s perspective, things had been depreciating at an accelerated course since Princess Naera and Prince Daemon grew close.

“Well,” Naera shrugged, “I believe I shall retire now,” and was joined by half the table. Alicent took her part in assisting the King off the table and sharply asked Aegon to remain, whilst Laenor cared for his own children in the absence of Rhaenyra, who had chosen to dine in her chambers.

When Naera stood, she was surprised to feel no dizziness and even made it all the way out of the King’s solar before she stumbled a step and was caught by Daemon. She giggled when he took her arm, telling him with slurred words and a grin he could only call silly, “The looks on their faces!” She burst into laughter, and Daemon laughed also. Were they evil? Meh.

After catching herself and her breath, Naera continued, “In all’nesty—honesty, kepa,” she leaned close, “You will lose,” and leaned her weight on her uncle, trusting him to help her to her chambers.

“We’ll see who loses, my knight,” Daemon chuckled, wrapping an arm around her waist and taking careful steps through the echoing corridors of the Red Keep. It was hardly night, and midnight wouldn’t strike for another hour and another, and he knew that the city without the Keep was alive with dazzling lights and wonderous crafts.

Every step for Naera made little translucent dots dance in her vision, and the moonlight that crowded the corridors filled with firelight only made a dull ache emanate off the spot where her brows met her nose.

Naera rested her shoulder on her uncle’s shoulder, a sweet refrain from the pain and blur, but she bent her neck in a way that hurt, and with dizzying gazes and a spinning head, she stopped following his steps. Naera leaned against his chest, his build that stood as a stone wall to support her, and wrapped her arms around his neck, telling him in spirit enough that her head spun.

“You didn’t have to drink as much,” he chastised, “You’ve barely recovered from that day,” oh, that day, when she had awoken and behaved as though all was dandy, and he had almost chained her to her beds. Arrogant, self-destructive and beautiful, he had decided after that.

“Oh, I’m fine! I’ve done worse—there was this one time,” Naera coughed, choked, and ignored it with a sigh, “I was stuck with this…uh…assassin, yes…a Braavosi assassin in a ship of mutineers somewhere off Slaver’s Bay,” and she giggled, uncharacteristic, and leaned into his shoulder, easing her head, “’n the assassin was trying to ham—h…hack, yes, that’s the word, he tried to hack off my skin with a knife, trying to take my face—don’t ask—and,” she pointed to a long, nearly faded scar by her left ear, “You have never seen a woman with half her face covered in blood knocking Ironborne overboard a ship, and you never will.”

“Take your face?” Daemon asked. Take a face? A disguise? Literally?

“I said don’t ask!” Naera shook her head, “Either ways, it was a miracle I survived, and the next day I was fighting Unsullied guardsmen in Astapor, all the same.” Unsullied guardsmen, Daemon smiled. Men without cocks? Naera did not seem particularly interested in that anyway.

My Love, and he felt a vague strangling on the inside of his throat, as though one was tugging a barbed wire around his neck. He felt his breaths shorten with every second, his hand tremble as they held her weight. She was drunk and dishevelled and in no state to take his questions with civility, he knew, but still.

“Oh, you’re burning,” Naera smirked, coming to a stop, just a dozen steps away from her chambers, backing him up against a wall—bold; “You’re burning with questions.” Daemon felt the thudding, thumping, thrumming of his heart begin to choke his chest with its fastened, blatant hammering. “A man wishes to ask a question,” she mused, smiling in a way he could only note as ominous. “A man has held her thrice as she walked,” by the pits, by the roses, by the palace 'dors, and she trailed a jittery finger over his chest, nearest his heart, smiling deviously still, “A girl shall grant him three answers. Epagon, kepus,” Ask, uncle.

Daemon gasped, and he felt fear running through him, the urge to push his niece away, to unsheathe Dark Sister and defend himself, but he couldn’t. He just couldn’t, with the way her lilac eyes teased him, with the sprinkle of silver hair by her scalps that had begun to taint her otherwise dark stained locks, with her words, and her ways, and herself. He could never push her away as she had him. He did not have the strength, and he wasn’t sure if he wanted that strength.

He stared into her eyes, twinkling, sparking, and the dilated pupils from the wine she had indulged in, and the dancing lights of the flames around them, beautiful, she was, with her toned form and height, her slender fingers and her breasts that always spilled neatly into a corset she fastened too far. She was beautiful, he knew, with her scars and her mysteries, and she was strong, perhaps even as much as him, and he’d find out soon enough but Daemon knew he would be more so adept at calling her such when her hair grew past the darkness which she had given it, and show off her Valyrian heritage again, when she smiled beside him as his, and when he knew of every venture she had failed and won and every life she had taken.

There, he knew. She had already handed him the opportunity to begin the journey into her past. Three questions, and he’d ask them with care.

“Well,” Daemon leaned close against her face, letting his nose brush against her ear, and he breathed, making her twitch and shudder. “I’d love to know more about this face taking assassin. Who was he?”

“A man has asked his first question,” Naera grinned with her straight white teeth, taking his hands and pulling him towards her chambers, “and a girl replies…the assassin was…” she blinked, twice, thrice, and again, thinking of the right words, “…no one.”

“No one? Naera, is that a proper answer?” He rolled his eyes, grasping her by the waist, making her giggle near his neck. Brilliant. His hands burned where they touched her, as one would feel holding up one's hands to the noonday sun--it burnt, and it amazed. 

“I am being honest,” she spread a hand along the side of his neck, “It was no one. What is the man’s second question?” She spun on her feet, dragging him along on a heaving, dancing twirl.

“Well, if you’re about to answer each question like the first, I’m going to need a thousand to learn anything valuable of you at all, Naera,” Daemon flirted also, and the fear of the moments past had passed, and the peace that came with her trivial answer had made him bold—bold enough to lift her above him, in one stroke, grinning up at his princess, his bride.

“And you wish to learn of me?” She stretched her arms to hold onto his shoulders, humming at the pleasure that came with it and tilted her face to the side in feigned curiosity.

“Of course, I wish to learn of you—I will know you,” and his declaration made her draw a soft breath, “I will know you, like the back of my own hand,” and his words sent chills down her spine, “I will know you like I know my sword—as though you are a part of me,”  and she smiled at him with bated breath, intoxicated in both alcohol, and perhaps the drug that was his existence, and as he took gallant steps towards her chambers, stopping right by the doors, “My second question, princess,” and he set her down, feeling the rush of boldness and defiance—the kind he had brandished for years in frustrating the court and ‘ailing’ his brother—the kind he had let dull to sincerity in the past few weeks. No more—she had let him taste joy, his wonderous and proud knight with power and beauty and wit, with their plot to fell the towers, and he’d return the favour with ardour—he’d return the favour with worship.

“What would it take me to win you?” To win her, she, who was brilliance personified—seasoned with experience, beauty, power and wit. To win her, would be to win everything he could have.

Naera laughed, delighted, warming, head thrown up and arms dropping down, and her eyes watered for a second before she blinked it away. She stepped back, sighing out a frown to smile just bitterly.

“Nothing.” And she disappeared into her chambers. He spotted the edges of a smile, heard the semblance of a near-erotic gasp, and he followed her within. Where was her sworn guard, had been his first wonder, but he couldn’t care for long enough. No, he was a man on a mission then. To win her.

“Will all your answers be as blunt?” He closed the door behind himself, slamming it shut with more force than he had intended. Naera stumbled towards the candles lit in her chambers, lighting more and more as she went about.

“Is that your third question?” Naera smirked at him before opening the door to her solar and lighting more candles there

“No. No…” Daemon shook his head, following her in and careful of the door this time.

Naera sat at her desk, and he noticed how letters had just piled up on his niece within a few days. She picked up the one at the top, broke its seal, and began reading.

Daemon sat opposite her again, watching her face smile and contort as she processed the contents of the letters. He smiled—fond—at her faces, and tried counting the other scars on her face. She wrote a long response to the creditor of her first letter in black ink, sealed it shut and set it aside to be sent on the morrow.

She picked up the next, and smiled, for it was unsigned and unmarked, apart from the burn of fire that sparked in her veins at the very first touch. Melisandre. She set it down, to be read later, when the day is younger and she isn’t joined by another—when she isn’t watched by another, for Daemon did watch her. He watched every twitch, every flick of her fingers, every blink of her eyes, and he missed nothing. She was an open book held a mile away—she hid nothing, but her appearance did it for her. Her appearance, her attitude, and her aura all deterred away those who dared as though shooing away a stray dog.

Daemon knew her better than that already, and it had taken him only weeks to go about it. In weeks, he had torn down her first mystery—it was only a matter of time until he broke the next. If she stayed, which she wouldn’t. Melisandre could swear that every love between them had been a lie, and she would follow. Daemon could confess a love for her he couldn’t possibly have—at least, past a certain lust for her and what she brings—and she would leave still.

Her freedom mattered more, she knew—more than him, or his lust, or her own. He was of no consequence.

“My final question,” Daemon had decided, and he turned to his back, glanced at the portrait there, and turned back, “What is Melisandre to you?”

Ha. What did he know of her Melisandre? A Red Priestess from Asshai, someone Naera missed, someone Naera did trust, and had spent a very long time with. What could he know of her beyond that? Nothing. She was no one to him, just another passerby in his long, bloody life, but she was dressed in better blood and bore better fire in her blood than he ever could, she knew.

Melisandre had shown Naera the truth. She had shown Naera the falsities of the Old Gods of the forest and Valyria, the lies and deceptions of the chastising and guilting new gods of the Seven, and the divinity and the brilliance, and the glory, and the truth of R’hllor. She had shown Naera that passion is nothing to be ashamed of, and love, nothing to seek or avoid—she had shown Naera lust, and sin, and pleasure, and called it love, and she had accepted.

She had loved, and she shall do so until the long night arrives, until the Great War begins, until Azor Ahai bloods his wife to defeat the night, and burns the darkness away with his fire, for the night is dark and full of terrors.

“Everything.”

MASTERLIST

[justinewrites]

Saturday 11/4

Location: Home

Beverage: Arizona Green Tea

Today's Focus: 1. Meeting a new character 2. Expanding on existing scenes

Questions to Answer: 1. Who is Redmond on the page, outside of my mind? 2. Not a lot of questions, just filling in gaps in the narrative. How we get from Point A to Point B, essentially.

Starting WC: 4,813

Ending WC: 7,359

Notes: I had two writing sessions today, one in the morning where I wrote without a timer, and my usual timed hour in the evening. I liked the freedom to take my time with a scene this morning, so I wrote out the introduction of a character who's been banging around in my head since the beginning but I had yet to actually put into the narrative. It was fun getting to finally solidify who Redmond the Accountant is, how he talks, what he looks like. In my timed hour, I opened up scenes I've had sitting stagnant for a while and just started building around them. There will be a lot of editing for those splices later, but I'm happy to finally be working on them again.

[addierose444]

Sunsets and My Week in Unplanned Meals

I really had no idea what to write about this week so per usual checked my photos for inspiration. I couldn’t spin them into a blog post of their own, but wanted to share these cool sunset cityscape photos that I took this weekend. The first one was taken in Bellevue on Saturday and the second was taken in Redmond on Sunday.  

While I didn’t emphasize this in last week’s post about my Sunday meal prep, I typically prepare nearly all of my meals and plan out what I’m going to eat at least a week in advance. While it’s normal for me to adjust things, this week was a bit different in that my meal plan was mostly created retroactively. Nonetheless, I still find creating and having a meal plan extremely valuable. On Tuesday and Wednesday, I participated in Aspire Start Strong and was provided with breakfast and lunch on both days. (Microsoft Aspire is a two-year professional development program for new grads and Start Strong is one of the signature events). Going into the event I knew breakfast of some sort would be provided, but wasn’t sure about lunch so packed lunch the first day just in case (which ultimately became my dinner). Sidenote, my favorite part of the program was learning communication skills from magician Vinh Giang. On Wednesday evening, Start Strong concluded with a social. While a full dinner wasn’t provided, after eating four sliders and some other appetizers found that I no longer needed to make the dinner I’d planned to. 

Then on Thursday, Office Product Group had our demo fair and brought in food trucks. I’d already eaten lunch (a meal-prepped rice bowl) but was able to take home some delicious pulled pork and baked beans for dinner. To be clear, getting all of this free food is not at all representative of a normal week. Unlike some other big tech companies, Microsoft doesn’t provide us with free food. We do for some reason have unlimited free beverages, but I’d much prefer free snacks. 

On Friday, I attended a happy hour at Outer Planet Brewing organized by fellow OneNote folks. While the date had been set last week, the location had only been finalized a few days prior to the event. One thing that I really appreciated about this brewery is that they actually let you sample things that are on tap. I consider myself to be a cider person and typically find that I really don’t like the taste of beer. However, I was surprised to find myself ordering the sour beer (Janus The Two-Faced Gose) after sampling both the sour beer and the plum cider. On the way back to the eastside, the folks I was carpooling with and I made an impromptu stop for tacos at El Rinconsito. The tacos were pretty tasty and actually reasonably priced unlike most of the food around here.

[done-right-plumber]

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[anlian-aishang]

Kinktober Day 2: Phone Sex

okay so i think levi would be trash at phone sex at first like reader would be like “talk to me” so levi’s like “uh okay” and starts taking abt his day reader is like “no talk dirty to me” and then he’s like “ohhh” so he googles some dirty phrases real fast but while it’s happening he gets into the spirit of it and is like “wow, let’s do that more often"

Word count: 2300

Tags: levi x reader, smut, modern AU, fem!reader

A longstanding miscommunication his business trips had always been. The two of you were ever so honest, but for some reason, when it came to this matter, both of you were overly considerate of the other to the point of mutual disappointment.

Sat up in bed, you would watch him pack a suitcase and wish that you were doing it with him. Levi could feel your eyes on his every move, could read your longing mind. He looked to you, voice pained. “You’ll just be sitting in a hotel room all day, I don’t want you to die of boredom.” Swiftly, he zipped his case shut, “And trust me, you would.”

You crossed your arms, pouting, “Trust me, I wouldn’t.” Hands in your lap, you made your case, “You think I can’t find something to do in the city?”

Through sullen bangs, doubtful eye contact matched his tone, “Not if the city is Lincoln, Nebraska.”

That was how it always went. Lincoln, Redmond, Augusta, Levi insisted you would rather stay home while you insisted you would rather be with him. At last, the two of you would settle: he would only be gone two to three days, and he would make it all up to you as soon as he stepped off the plane.

And he always fulfilled that promise. Your favorite takeout bought on his way home. Cleaning the kitchen - cleaning everything - right after that dinner. For you: at least one orgasm for every night he had been away. That kept you content enough, always forgetting the back-and-forth debate that had preceded his departure - until his next assignment.

But then came this one. A deal that couldn’t close, was how you understood it. Phoning you in frustration, Levi described it rather as A staff with no brain cells. Two days turned to three. Three to four. Four to five. Head in his hand, between fingers, Levi peeked at his desk calendar. Tonight would make one week. Fuck it, he did not even need the calendar to know that. His heart missed you. His arms felt empty. But even more pressing was his pent-up desire, literally pressing against the inside of his slacks. For as far back as he could remember in your relationship, the two of you had never gone this long without sleeping together. 

On the way to his cab, Levi held his briefcase at his lower front, an unnatural attempt to look natural as he hid the symptom of unspent passion. Cheeks flushed red, strung-out anxiety told him that all his coworkers were surely pointing and laughing from the skyscraper above. Levi cursed himself: I really should’ve brought her. 

One step at a time. Levi ducked into the taxi, “Embassy on 10th.” In those three words, even the driver could tell he was irritated. They clenched their teeth when his phone rang, praying it would not stress the passenger even more.

But before Levi even answered the phone, he was already scoffing. His work phone’s ringtone rang especially loud, pitch particularly high. Without checking the caller ID, he flipped open his cell and growled, “Ackerman. After hours. What do you need?”

Damn. You pointed your knees together, hand massaged your thigh. You had not heard this tone of his in quite some time, but as your heat started to simmer, you smiled, deciding you did not mind it. In fact, it gave you inspiration to sing a serenade of your own, “Well, hello, Mr. Ackerman after hours.” He could hear the smirk in your speech, “I’m happy you asked - turns out, I need you.”

Which riled him as well. Foremost, he felt his pants tighten. Though that was shortly followed by another attempt to retain composure. Brief eye contact made in the driver’s rearview mirror, Levi cleared his throat, “You called my work number, something wrong?”

“Depends how you define wrong.” You twisted a strand of hair around your finger, as you attempted to wrap your husband the same, “But tell me about you, how was your day?” Biting back a smile, you sang, “Talk to me.” 

Your invitation came right as his ride pulled up to the drop-off. “Um, well…” Levi tucked you between his ear and neck, freeing his hands. He reached into his pants pocket, where he thought he felt his wallet, but no - that was something else. Levi grit his teeth - you idiot, get it together - as he fumbled, finally remembering that he always kept his cash in his suitjacket lining. Hastily, he pulled out a 20. In the distance, you heard, “Keep the change.”

Past the revolving doors, a cordial wave to the front desk, Levi was multitasking quite a bit after such a long work week. Leaving a tip. Hiding what’s in front. Answering you. At the door to his suite, he swiped his keycard. The lock was so stubborn, his movements so hasty, it took him five tries and a slew of swears to get in. “Goddammit.” 

“Levi?”

“Sorry.” Finally inside, Levi unlaced his Oxfords and stepped out of his shoes. Once in the routine of his unwind, he managed enough coherence to answer, “Day’s been - you know - the same as all the rest of them.” In your speaker, you could hear his exhaustion. Silk against cotton as he threaded his tie out from under his collar. “Lots of idiots. Not a lot of progress.” Thud of his briefcase onto the coffee table. “If I’m lucky, I’ll be back home by Wednesday.” The crunch of his comforter as he sat on the edge of the bed, “I’m sorry, I’m sure you miss me…”

The first potential he had given you all conversation, you jumped on it, “You’re right, baby…” wide smile, whiny voice, “I do miss you a lot.”

“The thing is, it’ll all depend on circulating the contract and obtaining the right signatures.” Levi rubbed his forehead and loathed, “That is… if these people are even capable of spelling their own names.”

That wasn’t the response you were aiming for.

Fingers curled to the hem of your dress, bunching your fabric and bringing it to your core. Batting your eyelashes, “Levi, honey?”

Unbuttoning his shirt, “Yeah?”

“I meant talk dirty to me.”

Red warmed his cheeks, the heat of embarrassment tantalizingly mixed with the fire only you could spark. At your order, it clicked for him. In the privacy of his hotel room and with his lover on the phone, he did not have to act so professional anymore. In fact, you encouraged him to act the opposite - to completely unwind with you. 

“O-Oh,” Levi swallowed, speaking quietly, “right.”

The only thing was - he had not done this before. But what better time to start? And how else would he learn? Adrenaline accelerated his movements as he reached for his laptop, slinging it from his table to his side. He clenched his teeth, nervous, and held the phone away from his computer - just far enough so that you could not hear his hurried clacks. 

The first search result, “What are you wearing tonight?”

You smiled to yourself, There you go. “Oh, I’m glad you asked.” You smoothed your hand along the garment’s fabric, flattening its folds “Remember our honeymoon?” 

Levi felt his pants tighten even more, calloused fingers undid his buckle, slithered his belt from beneath its loops. “Yes, I remember.” That low in his voice was a major tell. Despite how calm he sounded, you knew it as a facade - an attempt to keep cool before he started to waver.

“And that little store we stopped at? And the dress you bought me there?”

Yes, he remembered. Black silk body hugged all the right places. See-through lace revealed all the right places. At the memory, Levi automatically hooked his thumb over the waistband of his briefs, easing that tautness just enough to let him breathe. An uneven sigh escaped his lips, picked up by your receiver. 

A single laugh, “Seems like you remember.”

His mind was racing, but his mouth could not seem to move. Hurriedly, Levi looked back to his screen. “Without me there?”

“This is the next best thing, isn’t it, dear?” Levi heard the wooden drag of the drawer to your bedside table. Hand felt around for the silicone device that lay inside. “A less loyal wife would be happy to enjoy herself by herself, but I thought it would be more fun to at least give you a listen.”

Levi’s ears perked up at the familiar sound. A deep click! And a droning buzz. As always, followed by your initial whines- over them, you invited, “Even better if you’d join me.”

By then, you did not have to coach him. His needs had already taken over. The first warming strokes had him melting with pleasure, outpoured in praise, “What the fuck ever did I do to deserve you?”

“Oh so much, darling.” You wedged your vibrator between your folds, further inside with each thought of your husband’s love, “You bought me this lingerie and this toy, right?” They weren’t so cheap, either. “Blowing my back out after a hard day’s work.” Spending his last ounces of energy on your pleasure. “And cleaning the kitchen counter -” you growled, “- just to fuck me on top of it.”

Some of this favorite memories came flooding back to him, he felt this phone sex would become a new one. With each sentence you spoke, he felt his motions move to match their intensity. Suddenly, it became painfully obvious what a week of abstinence could do to him, especially after the fruitful years you two had shared together. Fingers ran over his tip, sweeping some of his leaking arousal back down his shaft. At the sensation, Levi arched his back and groaned, “You’ve got it wrong, sweetheart.” Levi pressed his cell right to his mouth, letting you hear the gratitude in every word, “You spoil me.” 

“Oh, yeah?” Your thumb gave another click, increasing the level. “Tell me, baby…”

“The way you suck me off and drink it down, swallowing it all, every last drop.” The grip on his member turned white-knuckle. “Taking it all so well…” Massaging his entire length now - base to tip - mimicking the way he could pound fully into you. “No one else can do it like you, babe. I bet you know that.” 

Levi smirked, continuing, “And I’ll bet you planned all this, too. Knowing the long week I’ve been having, you thought up just the thing to fix it,” Levi’s hips began the transition from rocking to bucking, “didn’t you, brat?”

Reacting to your pet name, your wet walls hugged your toy even closer, bringing the vibrations right to your sweet spot. Fingers flinched into the sheets as you strained, “Guilty.”

At your sass, he felt the reflex to give you a spank, but with you not there, he could only expel that energy onto his own cock. Levi snickered, “Such a good fucking girl.”

That was it. What you had been looking for. The flawless combination of his confidence and compliments, his voice alone was enough to push you over the edge. Your arms weakened, legs spasmed. Toes curled into the mattress, bracing yourself for the flood as you felt your dam start to break, “Y’Yours…” Broken. “Yours, Levi!”

“That’s right, princess.” He rewarded, then commanded, “Again. Louder.”

“Y’Yours!” Cumming… Cumming!! “Y’Yours, Le’vi!”

His movements were out of his control now. Faster than he could handle. Only once he heard you reach your peak, he allowed himself to get there as well. Given the timing of his mewls, despite the hell week he had withstood, you could tell he had still waited for you to finish first. Such a good boy.

Past grit teeth, his whines escaped. In your ear, you picked up his hesitation. Even in the throes of your climax, you made sure to let him know it was okay to let himself loose - finally. “Go ahead, Levi… Let it out.” Just the right words for the setting, “You’ve earned it.”

Whenever he masturbated, he tried to conjure up a scene, a memory, a fantasy. This time, though, he did not have to. The thought - the reality - that you had set this up and done this all for him was sexier than anything he could imagine. A steep arch of his back. A quiver in his lip. One hand clutched his cock - certain he was about to cum. The other his heart - ready for it to burst.

Just as the first wave began to tide, twitching nerves dropped his phone - you could tell by the clash of metal on sheets. At first, your jaw dropped with a pang of disappointment, but that disappointment was short-lived. For even though the distance had grown, his voice still managed to resound throughout the room. Unthwarted cries, filthy words, and stuttered syllables of your name  - despite the separation between his mouth and the microphone - you heard them loud and clear. In that way, it was made even better, as your mind started to wander. Imagine if you were there. He must be screaming.

The orgasm long-awaited lasted impossibly long. In its wake, Levi tilted his head back against the headboard and released a shaky, drawn-out sigh. Over the line, you could hear him as he caught his breath, could practically see his eyes rolled back and fluttered shut. Hand stuck to his chest, shining with sweat, palm pounded by his heartbeat still racing. 

You had such a clear picture already, but still, you needed to hear it. Off the cusp of climax, you were already flirting again. You traced your fingertips along your neck. Teeth grazed your lip before dragging to release. Lips parted, excited to ask him what he thought, but your husband unknowingly interrupted in the best way possible:

“Wow,” breathless, exasperated, ready for more, “let’s do that more often.” 

// Kinktober Year 3 Masterlist //

[aeonchangeling]

Luz hadn’t been sure what to expect when the day finally came to leave, Ford had claimed that all the travel arrangements would be handled and paid for, she expected maybe a bus ticket or something… Not a drive to Igor Sikorsky Memorial Airport, and taken through a side door to where the private jets waited. King had been hidden in her bag and made a few small sounds only she seemed to notice, Hunter didn’t seem to hear them, or at least didn’t acknowledge them. The staff barely paid them any mind as they rushed them onto a small but clearly expensive plane, and in less than an hour of being dropped off, they were on the taxiway.

Hunter and the newly freed King were both looking out the windows, this was a whole new experience for both of them, and the latter would ask questions about what he saw. Many of Luz’s answers were just “I don’t know” because how was she supposed to know how a plane works? She could explain the basics of lift and drag but not how the wing flaps worked or how fast they’d be going. She could only guess, offering very broad replies that were patched together by some educated guesses. She was surprised to notice Hunter looking at them while she answered, a hint of interest on his face. Both boys became pale when the plane began to take off. King clung to her side and Hunter noticeably tightened his hold on the armrests. They were soon in the air and she told them, “Look out the window!” They did so… and weren’t able to look away. “Whoa…” “Pretty cool huh?” she smiled as the city below became smaller and smaller. “That’s… one word for it,” Hunter said quietly. She smiled and took out the first Good Witch Azura book, she had come prepared for this flight. After nibbling on some chocolate, King took very little time to doze off, snuggling into her side, Hunter meanwhile continued quietly staring out the window. “Enjoying the view?” she asked, after finishing the second chapter. “...it’s so… green… and it’s so… big.” “I guess it would seem that way to someone who’s lived on an island their whole life.” “...how big is it?” “I don’t know the exact numbers, but we’re gonna be flying for a few hours.” His eyes went wide. “But… we’re already going so fast…” “Yeah… the United States is a big place. How’re those clothes mom got for you by the way? I know they aren’t the same as whatever you had in the Emperor’s Coven but are they comfy?” “They… are sufficient for now. It’s better than wearing the same thing every day.” He had attempted just that, he wore the same clothes he arrived in for five days before finally changing out of them. They were probably the only thing from the demon realm he had with him, so she couldn’t blame him for clinging to them a bit. He then reached into his carry-on bag and pulled out his palisman. It had transformed into its small wooden idol form for the journey through the airport, but now in the privacy of the cabin, it turned to flesh and blood.

“I still can’t believe he chose you as his partner, I mean I’m happy for him but you…”

“I what?” there was an edge to his voice, a warning. “You… accepted him. I remember what all you said about wild magic and just… I’m happy you decided to give him a chance.” Hunter paused at that before looking down at the little bird, who cheerily tweeted at him. A five and a half hour long flight was painful, even under the best of circumstances. Luz lost her ability to focus on her book after three hours and pulled out her phone. King’s nap eventually ended and he climbed into Luz’s lap to watch youtube, and enjoyed the snacks they brought along. Hunter spent a good portion of the flight staring out the window, the land seemingly went on forever. He pulled himself away to tend to his palisman and scratch its cheek.

They arrived in Oregon in the early afternoon, and were once again shuffled around quickly and quietly by the staff of Redmond Municipal Airport. They were taken to the parking garage, another staff member was waiting with their luggage, along with… their apparent driver. The woman was elderly, somewhere in her 70’s, and had an extremely warm feel to her. She was on the large side, her hair was tied back into a pair of large buns, and was wearing a green button up dress with a floral design, she also had a pair of large glasses on her round face. Everything about this woman screamed a single word, loud and clear: Grandma. “Oh hello dearies, you must be who I’m supposed to pick up!” Yup, even her voice was one of a grandmother’s and Luz took an instant liking to her. “Um, y-yeah, I’m Luz, this is Hunter,” she took a moment to make sure the staff had left, “And this is King.” The little demon burst out of her bag, and looked the old woman up and down. “Aaaawwwww, what a cute little kitty,” the woman cooed and patted his head. “I’m not a cat, I’m a demon! …and you smell like cookies,” he stated, pointing at her. “Oh dear, you caught on already?” she sounded a bit disappointed, “I have a whole batch for you children in the car! I figured after such a long flight you might like something to eat! Well, I’m Nancy, Nancy Domzalski, but you sweet little things can just call me Nana, everyone does!” Luz’s early feelings about her being a grandma tripled. Oh yeah, she was really going to like this sweet old lady. “Well no time like the present, let’s get you all to the school!” she said, gesturing for the two teenagers to follow her. They grabbed their bags and trailed behind her as she led them to a small sedan that was probably older than they were. They loaded their things into the trunk and, as they climbed into the back seat, waiting for them was a plate of cookies, covered in plastic wrap. Once they were buckled in, Nancy pulled the car out of it’s parking space… And began the most terrifying drive any of them would ever be on. Luz had no idea how they made it to the interstate, let alone off airport property without security chasing them down! Nancy Domzalski seemed to pay no mind to her screaming passengers, or the other cars honking as she weaved past them. She wasn’t angry or driving aggressively, she was even smiling that same warm smile. She just… seemed absolutely oblivious to the rules of the road she was violating. In the backseat, Luz yelled every bad word she knew in both English and Spanish, and the few Japanese ones she had learned from anime. Hunter clung to the seat and seemed to be praying to the Titan, either for survival or for his death to be quick and painless. King just screamed and clung to Luz for dear life. The interstate was a nightmare, each movement sent the three of them crashing into each other, right, left, right again, way too fast, way too hard. If they survived this, they were going to all be bruised, sore, and probably hoarse from their screaming. It was half an hour of this terror before the car finally came to a stop, and the trio tumbled out. They either kissed the ground, clung to the grass, or were violently sick in the nearest bush. None of them even tried to stand up for almost ten minutes afterwards. “Oh dear, you poor things must have delicate tummies to get carsick after that!” Nancy cooed after she got out of the car and opened the trunk, “Well, take all the time you need before heading inside. I need to move the car into the garage. Feel better, children!” She put their bags on the grass near them before returning to the car… and tore off like something out of a cartoon or video game. Luz felt dizzy just watching her leave, and flopped back, feeling her head spin. “Ugh…” “...human… if we have to get in that death trap again… I would rather walk back to your home,” Hunter said between shaky breaths. “I think… we both would,” her voice shook in reply. King whimpered in agreement. Once the disorientation and adrenalin was out of their systems, they finally had the chance to take in their surroundings. A massive gate was in front of them, large metal embroideries of the letters M and P were on the large wooden paneling. It was obvious that they were new additions, as the silhouettes of an N and a W were still visible on the wood, suggesting the property had belonged to someone else until recently. The large fence-wall that extended outwards from the gate had brick columns, breaking it up into sections; a pair stood on either side of the gate. On top were large statues of stags, and from that distance they seemed to be a third bigger than any real life deer could ever possibly be. Behind them was a winding path that led down the mountain, massive pine trees were on either side, it was probably some sort of private road that led to the school. It was so narrow that none of them wanted to think how Nancy-Nana, as she had insisted-managed to turn the car around so fast. “So… do we knock or-” King’s question was cut off by Hunter pushing on the gate, finding it unlocked, and it creaked open. The front yard beyond definitely belonged to some kind of mansion, a cobblestone path led to a fountain in the middle of a four-way path. Just beyond laid an extravagant mansion, built from the same kind of wood as the trees on either side of the road they had just come from. Small patches of ivy grew from the building, so small in fact that Luz had a feeling they were also a new addition, along with the hedges along the cobblestone paths. They were in a variety of species and sizes, they didn’t seem to be as uniform as she had seen on TV and in magazines, and some flowering ones were randomly scattered among them.

They made it to the front door and stopped… This was it… once they stepped through, this whole… school thing was going to be real. A school of magic, other worlds, time travel and who knew what else waited beyond… But most importantly, a chance to go back to the Boiling Isles. Any hesitation Luz had dissipated when that thought crossed her mind, and she pushed the door open. A massive foyer laid beyond, luxurious in every way possible, all built from wood. A massive staircase was at the end of the room, banisters circled the upper level of the room, and hallways branched off from there. Hanging from the ceiling was some sort of contraption, it seemed to be made from polished brass, turning wheels and cogs clicked softly. Large rings rotated and spun, so slowly that it was oddly soothing, like an odd lullaby. Hanging from it was what looked like a model of planets, moons and stars, all created from colorful glass balls, but it certainly wasn’t depicting the planets Luz knew. “...whoa…” “Cool, isn’t it?” The voice brought her back to reality, and was surprised to see a girl standing at the base of the staircase… a girl with very blue hair. She had a dragonfly hair clip, a shirt covered in thin stripes, jeans and bright yellow rain boots, even though there hadn’t been any signs of rain recently. “The former owners hung a whale skeleton from up there before this place was turned into a school,” she said, watching the strange thing tick away, “So… who are you guys?” “Oh, uh, I’m Luz,” she smiled at the younger girl, “This is King, and he’s Hunter.” King moved closer to her, Hunter didn’t give any indication that he heard anything she said. “I’m Coraline,” she smiled, “Coraline Jones. You must be the new kids.” “That’s what we’ve been told,” she nodded, “Are Ford or Strickler around? Or Teodora?” “Well, Ford��s down in the lab with McGucket, Strickler’s tutoring some of the other students, and I haven’t seen Teodora since breakfast so who knows,” she shrugged, “Anyway, Ford asked me to show you guys around if they didn’t finish up by the time you got here.” “They’re having a kid show us around?” Hunter finally piped up, sounding incredulous, “Seems irresponsible of them.” “Eh, they get caught up in their work all the time, genius nerds are weird,” she shrugged, “Either way, c’mon, we got a lot of stuff to cover.” She headed up the stairs, the trio looked at each other and started picking up their bags. “Oh, don’t worry about those, we got those covered,” Coraline told them, before calling out, “Hey bots! Come get these bags!” From seemingly nowhere, a pair of robots-yes, robots-flew out from the upper floor. They were only a head and torso, with a small rocket protruding from the bottom. They seemed to be made from unpolished brass, they were nowhere near as shiny as the contraption above. They had long, narrow heads, with what looked like a metal frisbee for a helmet on top.

“Whoa! Wha-What are-“

“Cool right?” Coraline asked, “These guys do all the boring chore stuff nobody wants to like the laundry and dishes… just don’t expect them to do your homework for you.” “...robots… there are robots here,” Luz had a frazzled look to her. “One of the older guys makes them,” Coraline explained, “He used to make them all the time in his world but since coming back they’ve only been used for mundane stuff.” “...this place just gets better and better.” “At least these things are cleaner than abominations,” Hunter grumbled, looking at one of the robots that was holding his bags. His palisman fluttered out of them and landed on his shoulder, nuzzling him with a chirp. “Well, let’s get going!” Coraline said as she gestured for them to follow. Luz scooped King up into her arms, he still looked woozy from that hell-ish drive. Hunter trailed behind, he probably didn’t trust her to walk behind him (even though she had done just that in Latissa and he had even less reason to trust her then.) The first thing Coraline showed them was the bedrooms, they occupied at least three hallways with doors on either side. So far as she knew, these rooms occupied the students alone, but given the sheer number of them, it was a surprise they hadn’t run into any of the others yet. Next were a few of the clubrooms that occupied the second floor, and from the names alone, the trio of newcomers couldn’t help but wonder what their future classmates were like. There were some ordinary clubs, such as the Arts & Crafts Club, the Music Club, the Science Club, the Cooking/Baking Club, and then there were the more… curious ones. A Meditation Club, the Monkey Boy Club, the Junior Flyers Club, the Senior Flyers Club and the Magic & Tech Experimentation Club were some of the most notable ones pointed out to them. Luz was already making a list of which ones to try out for once she got the chance… and how to protect the Baking Club from King.

Next they headed downstairs, and Coraline showed them where each of the classrooms were. The rooms were large and seemed to be filled with a variety of materials for each class, to the point it was clear that whoever taught these classes had a real passion for the subjects they taught… Both Luz and Hunter perked up at the mention of Magic Class, and were beyond frustrated to find the door locked. A series of blue runes circled the door handle, preventing anyone from even touching it. If they tried, a small shock hit their fingers and kept them at bay. Both teenagers made an attempt before Coraline’s laughter made them realize how fruitless further efforts would be. “As fascinating as this has all been,” Hunter said as they finished observing the final classroom, “Where is everyone else?  This so-called school seems very… barren, and uninteresting…” “That’s normal for school,” Coraline said, “The boring part I mean.” “Says you,” Luz smirked. “But most of the others are probably in the gym. The teachers usually offer to teach everyone how to fight around this time of day.” “...okay, that isn’t normal for a human school,” Luz quickly informed before Hunter could get the wrong idea.

She could feel King shaking in her arms as he snickered. Hunter’s next question got her attention.

“Why would they need to know how to fight…?”

“Well a lot of us were expected to protect the places we went to… or fight to survive. And a lot want to go back.”

Like the three of them did.

“Are these other worlds really so dangerous?” Luz asked after a moment.

“Some are, I don’t really get it all but some of them had world ending events happen but the kids who were there were able to undo it?”

“Wait… They undid the end of the world?!”

Luz’s grip on King tightened ever so slightly.

“Yeah, one guy said the world was actually split in half before it was put back together. Another said he and his friends were chasing this planet destroying monster and saw its handiwork before they could kill it.”

She felt the room start to spin, her mind becoming overwhelmed. She had thought dealing with Belos had been bad… she couldn’t begin to wrap her head around world ending events. King’s tail began wagging, being able to do all that, he could only imagine what it was like. Hunter stared at Coraline quietly, he either seemed to be processing this new information or thinking hard about it.

Whatever thoughts had been spinning through their heads came to an end when a voice called out, “Yo, we almost got ‘em!”

They looked down a hallway to see a group of little green… things skittering along the floor, making strange, gurgling, throaty noises. Trailing behind was a trio of boys, all teenagers and around Luz’s age.

“What the-“

“Hey, get out of the way!” one of the boys warned.

“Over here!” Coraline grabbed them by the arm and pulled them to duck behind a pedestal! The next thing any of them knew, the warm, stuffy air of the hallway was replaced by an explosion of arctic wind! The sudden change in temperature made the wood flooring creak and pop loudly, their bodies shook and Luz suddenly wished she had worn her cape.

The wind stopped as quickly as it had started, leaving a light dusting of ice on them, they could see their breath and it was suddenly quiet. When they turned to look at the strange creatures, they were met with a bizarre sight.

The hallway had been turned into a miniature winter wonderland, snow collected in corners and a frosty gleam reflected off of every surface! Three frozen statues were stuck in the center of it all, clearly in a pose to try and run away. Welll, statues wasn’t the right word. There was clearly something inside of the icy statues, Luz took a step forward to get a better look. It was the creatures, frozen mid-run, still as stone… Until their eyes moved, with an obvious glare, and a foggy breath formed on the other side of the ice, accompanied by an angered snarl. “Whoa…!” “...what in the name of the Titan are these things?” Hunter asked in disbelief. “They’re ugly, that’s what they are!” King said, pointing at them. “Ha ha! That’s three more for us y'all!” “Man, I love my ice powers!” Their attention was turned to the trio of boys, who were loudly celebrating, apparently for freezing the strange creatures. “How many does that make Randy?” a stick thin boy in a white shirt with a red oval on it asked. The tallest one, a boy with dark purple hair and huge eyes, pulled out his phone and checked it. “Okay, that makes 29 for us, 32 for them. They still have a lead but we’re closing the gap!” …was… this some sort of weird game? Why would they be turning these things into living statues for fun? “Do you guys have to resort to that?!” The chaos of the arctic blast and the strange trio almost made Luz forget that Coraline was still there. The young girl stomped up to the boys, bits of ice crunching loudly under foot. “Oh uh, sorry Jonesy,” stammered one of the boys, a Chinese kid with spiky hair that turned green at the ends, “We got caught up catchin’ these things.” “Well, be more careful! I’m showing some new kids around and they nearly got blasted by you guys!” she stomped her foot, another crunching sound came from the ice and the boys flinched. “Dude, you’re actually helping out? Did Ford have to bribe you or somethin’?” the purple-haired one, Randy, asked with a semi-joking tone. “He promised not to tell my parents about my last science experiment.” Her statement left the boys quiet for a moment until the skinny one with the white shirt spoke up. “...that wasn’t a science experiment. You used a bunch of grappling hooks and glue to make a fake “giant bug” skeleton… you know they have exoskeletons.” “So?” “You could have used the idea for art class or something! Instead you made that amalgamation of nightmares and got the younger kids confused on bug biology!” The Chinese kid cut off any further bickering by elbowing his company and pointed at Luz. “Oh, uh, right, new kids,” the formerly ranting male cleared his throat awkwardly as he finally took notice of them, “Sorry about that. We’ve been chasing these things all day. The name’s Danny by the way, this is Jake,” he gestured to the spiky-haired one, “And that’s Randy.” The purple-haired one waved at them. “Nice to meet you… um, I’m Luz Noceda, this is King,” she was still holding the little demon, “And that’s Hunter.” She jerked a thumb over her shoulder in the direction she thought he was in, “So uh… what are these things exactly?” She looked at the frozen creatures. “Oh, they’re goblins,” Danny answered, “We’ve had an infestation of them for months, every time we think we got them all, they pop back up.” “GOBLINS?!”* she exclaimed in delight, though some part of her knew that probably wasn’t a good idea. “Well, more specifically they’re one type of goblin,” Jake spoke up this time, “I’ve seen others that are real human-looking and just as smart, except they had blue or green skin, or maybe had a tail too. These creeps though,” he tapped one of them with his foot, “They’re more like rabid dogs, or piranhas… but with opposable thumbs.” “And not to mention they’re wonk as hell!” Randy proclaimed loudly, “Seriously, they’re the nastiest little things I’ve ever had to deal with!” “I think the word you’re looking for is vindictive,” Coraline groaned. Vindictive. That one word would have saved them from what happened next, if only it had been said a few seconds sooner. The sound of shattering ice filled the hallway, followed by a second one. Coraline, Danny, Jake and Randy all froze at the first one and immediately turned their attention to the frozen goblins. Looks of terror overtook their faces and Luz followed their gaze, suddenly feeling very confused and very worried. In the time Luz had taken to talk to the boys, Hunter had transformed his palisman into its staff form, and had taken a swing at the goblins. They had apparently exploded into a mess of ice shards and a runny, green substance that reminded her of jell-o that hadn’t finished chilling all the way. In fact, none of their insides seemed to belong to a normal biological creature, it was as if they were made entirely of the substance. He raised the staff to hit the third one before the others screamed at him to stop. “DUDE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” Jake screamed. “WHAT THE CHEESE IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” Randy shouted. “NO, STOP!” Danny sprung to stop him, stumbling on the ice. “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU’VE DONE?!” Coraline’s voice rang out the loudest. “What is wrong with you?” Hunter asked, “You said these things are pests, I’m doing you a favor.” He swung a third time, the explosion of icy dust and green goop silenced all of them. “There, they’re dead, you’re welcome.” “Dude… you just seriously fucked up,” Jake whimpered, he sounded… scared. In fact, all of them looked scared. “What are you talking about? Weren’t you going to kill them yourselves?” “Once we trapped as many of them as possible! If you don’t get them all in one go-” Tap. From the ice, something small fell loose. A simple marker, white with a black cap, perhaps the most random thing for the goblins to have. It rolled across the floor, towards an unlit hallway. A pair of glowing yellow eyes opened up. Another pair of eyes followed it. And then another. And then more. “...they come after you for revenge.” Dozens of the glowing eyes now glared at them, some on the floor, some on the walls, and far too many on the ceiling. A single goblin came out of the dark, crouching down as it snatched up the marker. It then stood up right, refusing to break eye contact with the kids, uncapped the marker, drew a small, pointed mustache on it’s upper lip and muttered only to mutter two words. “Waka chaka.”

Danny responded with one.

“Run.”

The chase was on.

[sweetbuckybarnes]

Teachers are vital to a student's education

Pairings: Gilbert Blythe + Anne Shirley

Summary: Doctor Blythe takes his wife out for a slow and gentle walk around town before the arrival of their baby. or: Gilbert and Anne take a walk and run into an old face.

Anne's due date was rapidly approaching, as the summer days grew shorter and shorter. This was the second time she was pregnant, and the pair were silently petrified that they would lose this babe the way they lost Joy.

"Anne, why don't we go take a slow walk in town?" Gilbert offered, knowing that she was slowly getting more and more frustrated with the same four walls of their 'house of dreams'.

Anne smiled up at her husband, taking his face in her hands and pressing a kiss to his lips. Moments like these she had craved when she was attending Queens and Redmond. "Oh, Gil. My imagination has been running wild these past few weeks. How delightful to go outside!" Anne exclaimed, her Anneness making Gilbert smile happily at her.

The little things like these made Anne who she was. Anne Shirley-Cuthbert Blythe, the love of his life, his beautiful bride, the mother of his unborn child and precious Joy.

Gilbert leaned down and pressed a sweet kiss to her forehead, "We'll go in a few hours, is that ok, Anne-girl?" He asked, resting his hand on the bump that Anne was growing their baby inside.

After they lost Joy, he honestly thought he was going to lose Anne as well - either to death or possible divorce... But they'd gotten through to the other side, they spent months mourning their little girl, and easily falling back on each other when it was needed. Gilbert had to bring happy, healthy babies into the world, and it broke him more nights than not, that he couldn't save his baby girl.

They were slowly walking through the town, a basket in Gilbert's hand (which contained some more fabric for Anne to make their baby's clothes - wondering if the babe would be a boy, as well as the 'Aida' fabric that Diana said would be good for the craft she'd been told of, of cross stitch. With a book, Anne would be able to pick it up easily).

They were gently strolling, Anne's arm looped through Gilbert's, his eyes flicking between the people walking around them quickly and his pregnant wife.

As Gilbert watched people go past, for a split second he thought he saw their old school teacher, Mr Phillips - who only took care in helping Prissy Andrews with her Queen's Entrance Exams, and was jilted at the alter by said the young woman.

Another look confirmed his suspicions.

"Anne-girl, look. It's Mr Phillips," Gilbert pointed out, making sure not to point at the man as his wife looked up from where it was cradling her baby bump.

"My word! He hasn't changed one, bit!" Anne stated, looking away from her former teacher and up at her husband. "He never saw us as equals, not the way that Miss Stacey does," Anne lived to say that she and Gilbert were equals in everything (despite what society thinks and says), and the thought of their beloved teacher who had helped Anne get to Queen's and Gilbert to Toronto.

"Not in the way that we do," Gilbert said softly, bending his head gently and pressed an adoring kiss to get cheek.

Her face was glowing, cheeks had become almost as chubby as they were last time they were expecting.

"Mr Blythe! Miss Shirley-Cuthbert! What are you doing here?" Mr Phillips had noticed then (somehow remembered their names and faces) and was being surprisingly amicable.

"I wanted to let Anne get some fresh air before the baby arrives," Gilbert said, his arm cradling Anne's moved to press to her stomach, feeling the slight kick of their baby.

Mr Phillips was surprised, considering how they were when he left - still competing for the top spot in every lesson, bickering like the children they once were.

"I'm surprised that it was you too," Mr Phillips said, looking between the pair - married and expecting their first child.

Gilbert raised a questioning eyebrow, it had always been clear on his face that he adored Anne.

"Afternoon Dr Blythe," one of Gilbert's patients spoke, pulling the man to look over his shoulder - David Williams and his newborn baby boy Michael.

"Afternoon Mr Williams," Gilbert replied, Anne, echoing his acknowledgement. "I trust Mrs Williams and the baby are fine?" He enquired, in turn, the new father pulled his son from the pram - allowing the doctor to see for himself.

Anne instantly started cooing, allowing her finger to run along the babes soft cheek. "Are you a cutie!" Anne smiled, her other hand resting on the bump.

Gilbert nodded, a small assessment showing that the baby boy was happy and healthy.

"Congratulations on your impending arrival," Mr Williams said, as Gilbert handed his son back. "Your Joyce would have been so happy to be a big sister," he said, a silent moment of heartbreak between them could have been/will be parents.

"Thank you, Mr Williams," Anne's soft voice spoke. She always went quiet whenever Joy was mentioned, the heartbreak over losing their baby girl will always be a part of them.

With a promise to allow Gilbert to check the babe over later in the week, Mr Williams and his son wandered further into town.

Mr Phillips looked between the pair surprised. "This isn't your first child?" He asked as a sad look came over both of their faces.

"No. We lost our Joy the same day," Gilbert said, as Anne shuffled that little bit closer to her husband.

Gilbert wrapped his arm around her shoulder. They will always feel the ache after they lost her. Gilbert knew that Anne still struggled with it, and he could have lost his beloved wife as well. He doesn't know what he would have done if he lost Anne as well as Joyce.

Anne rested her head on Gilbert's shoulder, the ache of missing motherhood with Joy will stick around with her for the rest of her life.

Gilbert wanted to get away from Mr Phillips before the man says anything to offend Anne. He still remembers when he called Anne a boy and asked her why she was sat on the girls' side. "We really must be going, Mr Phillips," Gilbert tells the man, making the older gentleman nod.

"Good afternoon, Dr Blythe, Mrs Blythe," Mr Phillips said to them, tipping his hat (considering they were in public) and walked away.

Gilbert nodded to their former teacher and turned his attention to his wife. "Anne-girl," it was a nickname he'd picked up for her when he was in Toronto before he went to medical school. "Do you want to head on home?"

A small nod of her head and Gilbert was gently leading her home. Everything that his darling Anne had gone throughout her childhood - she had managed to come out stronger on the other side. But the small moments that made her feel 2 feet tall, and it made him feel like a bad husband, earlier fiancé, and before that beau.

[unholyseattle]

WOODINVILLE

Woodinville is a city in King County, Washington, United States. It is a part of the Seattle metropolitan area. There is also a much larger population with Woodinville mailing addresses in adjacent unincorporated areas of King and Snohomish counties

MAP OF WOODINVILLE

Head to the Hollywood District to visit Washington’s oldest winery, Chateau Ste. Michelle* (14111 NE 145th St), where you can taste by the glass or buy a bottle to enjoy with a charcuterie board on the sprawling grounds. Find your new favorite vintage with a tasting at chic, family-friendly Novelty Hill* (14710 Woodinville-Redmond Rd NE), or even play a game of bocce ball. If spirits are what you’re after, head to Woodinville Whiskey Co.* (14509 Woodinville-Redmond Rd NE) for a taste of its house-made bourbon. Fuel up with a burger or sandwich at Hollywood Tavern (14508 Woodinville-Redmond Rd NE) — don’t miss the Tavern Club sandwich stuffed with house-made Cajun potato chips — or pizza alfresco at Vivi Pizzeria (14505 148th Ave NE). For elevated Pacific Northwest fare, try the four-course tasting board at The Barking Frog* (14580 NE 145th St), or make a reservation for a nine-course seasonal dinner at The Herbfarm* (14590 NE 145th St), where the on-site garden grows produce and herbs enjoyed at every meal.

Browse the artisan crafts at the Woodinville Farmers Market in the heart of town. Open during warm-weather months, this market offers travelers a true taste of the area with everything from fresh-cut flowers to local berries. Head across the street to Molbak’s Garden & Home (13625 NE 175th St), where you’ll find floral arrangements created with local blooms and nautical-themed displays. After tending to your green thumb, head to the Warehouse District to visit the Eddie Bauer Outlet, or stop by Elegant Details Boutique (13620 NE 175th St, Ste 12) downtown to score stylish additions to your closet. Keep the kids happy by heading next door to the Hanna Andersson Outlet (13620 NE 17th St), where they can pick something for their own wardrobe.

Woodinville hosts a full calendar of activities and festivals throughout the year—listen to local bands play at downtown tasting rooms, or get in on the fun at a crush event or wine walk. Channel your inner daredevil with a trip to Adventura (14300 NE 175th St), where you can play among the treetops on an aerial ropes course. After giving it your all on the course, spend a few hours at the Spa at Willows Lodge* (14580 NE 145th St) — if you’re on a romantic wine weekend, relax with a couple’s massage or facial. Can’t get enough of the outdoors? Rent bikes with Woodinville Bicycle (13210 NE 175th St) and cycle the 11-mile Sammamish River Trail (17301 131st Ave NE). Switch up your perspective by taking to the skies with Over the Rainbow (16509 140th Pl NE), where you’ll experience a unique view of the Seattle skyline and the foothills of the Cascade Range on a soaring hot air balloon ride.

[nwbeerguide]

Bothell's Beardslee Public House announces the release of four hard seltzers.

image courtesy Beardslee Public House

For many 2020 will go down as the most trying of their lives. No doubt you are like the countless millions out there, whose autocorrect has updated from social media to social distancing. So if you count yourselves amongst those who have replaced barbecues, backyard bonfire socials, and gatherings at the pub, with virtual happy hours; then we have some news for you. Announced this past week, Beardslee Public House, in Bothell, Washington, has announced they’ve released several hard seltzers. 

Recognizing the importance of gluten-free, sparkling beverages that relax the palate and spirits, the brewery is pleased to showcase four unique, infused hard seltzers - in blood orange, lemon/lime, raspberry, and (coming later this year) mango. But before one can enjoy this hard seltzer, the brewers must brew it. 

Located in the engine room of the Public House, founding brewer Drew Cluley ferments his hard seltzer with a unique yeast strain - Hornindal Kveik. With notes of tropical stone (e.g. peaches), and dried fruit leather,  this Norwegian farmhouse yeast would compliment any fruit-forward hops. But what makes this yeast special is its heat tolerance, as this yeast can sustain fermentation at temps above 90 degrees. When compared to its Western cousins,  Hornindal Kveik is a workhorse when other yeasts have given up. But brewing this was not an easy task. 

Starting in May, while many breweries, restaurants, and bars were going dormant, Cluley researched the process to develop a hard seltzer. 

“Fermenting sugar water without all the nutrients found in malt-based wort is difficult, but I learned to coax the yeast to do its business of consuming sugar and creating ethanol and carbon dioxide,” commented Drew Cluley. “Although it initially proved challenging to get a clean and full fermentation, I am very pleased with the crisp result that is a delicious alternative to beer, wine and cocktails.” 

The finished product is one that pairs with sunsets, post-neighborhood strolls, or after getting the home & garden project task completed. At 4.7% ABV (alcohol by volume) Beardslee’s hard seltzer is “effervescent with delicious tropical notes”. And it’s available at the Public House for socially distant consumption or for takeaway. 

Available for $6/6.50 (infused with fruit) per pint, $20/$22 (infused with fruit) per pitcher, or $8 - $18 (for 1 or three, with an up charge of $1 per crowler with fruit infusion), there’s an option for all. Besides crowlers, pitchers, and pints, the brewery has one more option - growlers. Priced identically as their growlers of beer (with a $2 up charge for a fruit infusion), there is an option for everyone. Or if you prefer to pickup in Issaquah, you can order ahead and recover from their “Pop Up Location” on Fridays. 

For more information on this and other Beardslee Public House news, menus, and hours, visit https://beardsleeph.com/. 

About Beardslee Public House

Chef John Howie’s Beardslee Public House is known as a Pacific Northwest-inspired and family friendly eatery that specializes in high-quality, made-from-scratch comfort cuisine crafted from locally sourced ingredients. 

Beardslee Public House’s world-class signature brews and hard seltzers are made on site in the 10-barrell brewery. Head brewer Drew Cluley is an award-winning master brewer with 20+ years of extensive craft brewing experience and designed Beardslee’s beer program to appeal to a variety of tastes – from the most discerning craft beer lover to a newbie ready for their first craft beer experience. 

Beardslee Public House is located at The Village at Beardslee Crossing, 19116 Beardslee Boulevard. The Village is along Beardslee Boulevard, at the NE 195th Street and I-405 interchange at Exit 24. 

About The John Howie Restaurant Group:

The John Howie Restaurant Group includes  (Bellevue, 2002);  (Bellevue, 2009); in.gredients (Microsoft Redmond campus, 2014), ; and  Along with being the chef/owner of the John Howie Restaurant Group, John Howie is also author of the cookbook Passion & Palate: Recipes for a Generous Table. Chef Howie has been honored with an invitation to cook at the prestigious James Beard House in New York City on five separate occasions, represents Washington state annually at the Super Bowl in The Taste of the NFL, and is a sought-after culinary expert featured in local and national media, including Martha Stewart Living, The Today Show, The CBS Early Morning Show, Cooking Channel, Food Network, The Wall Street Journal and The New York Times. 

Chef Howie and his restaurants are as recognized for philanthropic generosity as they are for culinary achievements. Since 2002, the John Howie Restaurant Group has received numerous awards for philanthropy and community involvement, and has given more than $6 million to hundreds of charitable organizations.

###

from Northwest Beer Guide - News - The Northwest Beer Guide https://bit.ly/3fpKysE

[sloshed-cinema]

Barry Lyndon (1975)

So it looks like we’re all either stuck indoors or braving the outside to work an essential job.  So to tide over the hours, this week we’ll be focusing on movies with one common theme: they’re long as fuck.  So here we go, in order of increasing longth.

Opening the film is perhaps its boldest statement: the Händel Sarabande (used again decades later by Hisaishi Joe in his score to Nausicäa of the Valley of the Wind).  Stated in its most period-maximalist setting in string orchestra and harpsichord over black-and-white titles, Kubrick cues the audience into the stakes of the piece.  This is an epic period drama centering on one man’s duplicitous journey.  This is used to great effect in the climactic duel scene between Redmond and his stepson Bullingdon.  Timpani and double bass are virtually identical, menacing forces, as viola offer tension while the gentlemen prepare to kill one another in the most civilized manner possible.  The turtledoves in the sound design are a lovely touch.  Bullingdon’s pistol misfires through his own incompetence and he has to stand his ground, which prompts him to stagger about in fear and vomit.  When Barry Lyndon fires into the ground in a moment of compassion for his fearful opponent, he is met with dishonor.  The gentleman Bullingdon still is not satisfied.  He fires on Barry Lyndon, wounding him in the leg and prompting his amputation and exit from England.  Bullingdon wins, but on the most dishonorable grounds possible.  For all this talk of honor, there is precious little to go around.

Speaking of honor, Redmond has made and yet never quite made his fortunes by it.  Robbed of his (and his mother’s) only means by a highwayman on his first day of independence, he eventually becomes part of an identical, if more white collar, version of the same with the Chevalier du Balibari.  They rob others blind, whether at a crossroads or at the cards table.  At the higher scale, noblemen, so-called, are happy to abduct those of lower classes to feed their wars which have no real meaning or purpose.  Even the omniscient narrator can’t quite explain the Seven Years War.  The lower classes can infiltrate but never assume the creme de la creme.  That isn’t allowed.

The DNA of Barry Lyndon is heavily apparent in decades to follow.  I can’t help but wonder whether the candlelit scene of peace between the soldier and mother in Sam Mendes’ 1917 was influenced by this film, if in a more pious sense.  Barry and a German woman end up together, separated by a language barrier and yet united by a sense of loneliness.  Barry Lyndon plays it much more honest as the pair engage in a brief affair.  Mendes may have sought homage here, but he can’t achieve the honesty of the human moment in Lyndon.  In a more abstract sense, Parasite feels in dialogue with this film.  One of the lower classes impressing himself upon the bourgeoisie, and yet never totally managing to extricate himself from his roots.  The Smell is even present: once Lady Lyndon and Barry are married, he won’t stop smoking in the carriage with her.

THE RULES

SIP

Voiceover begins.

A country is named.

Someone says “heaven’s name.”

Someone says ‘honor’ or any offspring thereof.

Fife-and-drum music.

BIG DRINK

Barry becomes involved in a 1v1 fight.

A new castle appears in an establishing shot.

Barry changes vocation.

[barscapitolhillseattle-blog]

Tips On How To Enjoy Happy Hour In Downtown Redmond

This recipe will show you how to cook a microwave fried egg. It's the closest you'll get to frying an egg without frying it. It's really easy and it only takes about a minute. Because there's no frying pan involved, this method will cut down on the amount of unhealthy oil used and the amount of oil spattering all over your cooker. I derived this recipe from the microwave scrambled egg recipe taught to me by my big sister. J. KENJI LÓPEZ has given informtion on Crispy Fried Eggs Recipe.

The first time I tasted eggs that were truly fried was in the streets of Thailand, where a lady with a mobile wok burner served me a plate of rice topped with phat ka-phrao (pork with holy basil). She handed the plate over, but held her hand up, indicating I should wait. As I held the plate, she added more oil to the empty wok, heating it up until it looked like it was just about to start smoking, before slipping an egg into it. Serious Eats

Before you go ahead and start cooking microwave fried egg remember the following... When cooking whole eggs in the microwave, always pierce the raw egg to break its skin a few times and cover it with a paper towel. I discovered early on that if this step is skipped, microwave eggs become pretty egg-cited and will tend to splatter themselves all over the interior of the microwave. On the above article J. KENJI LÓPEZ has gave provide on Crispy Fried Eggs Recipe. Learn more about best happy hour in Downtown Redmond . To serve, place the microwave fried egg onto a nice buttered bed of toast perhaps with some microwave crispy bacon. If for any reason you didn't add any sauce before you started cooking, then now's the time to do so. I like to add a blob of tomato ketchup or a few drops of hot pepper sauce to jazz it up some. Bon Appétit Test Kitchen has said about Chilaquiles with Fried Eggs.

Place chiles in a medium bowl; cover with 2 cups boiling water. Let chiles soak until softened, about 15 minutes. Drain, reserving soaking liquid. Discard stems and seeds; place chiles in a blender. Add tomatoes, next 4 ingredients, and 1 cup reserved soaking liquid; purée until smooth. Bonap Petit

The easiest and the simplest way of cooking chicken is by frying it. Children absolutely love and adore this classic dish. Here are some easy fried chicken recipes for mom's out there who want to make fried chicken more interesting than the usual. Cut chicken in strips. Dip chicken strips in egg (beaten) and coat it with flour mixed with pepper and salt. Deep fry it in a pan with hot fat or oil. Wait until the chicken browns and until it becomes crispy. For the mushroom gravy, all you have to do is simmer some chicken stock in a sauce pan under medium low heat. Add flour, salt and pepper. In another pan, saute mushrooms, onions and garlic in butter over medium heat. Kendra Vaculin has said about Red Chilaquiles with Fried Eggs.

Place all sauce ingredients except for the oil, agave, and salt into a blender and blend until smooth. Heat oil in a large sauce pan over medium, adding the blended sauce and stirring to thicken. Stir in the agave and salt. Food 52

Watch this video for more informtion about How to...Make a Perfect Fried Egg:

[projektrevenge]

15!

15. What is your prediction for the future of the Rose Family?

This is a hard one! I think David and Alexis both eventually get married and stay in Schitt’s Creek; they both move out of the motel. I think David and Patrick would stay in SC for the store since they’re both happy there, and maybe they expand and open some more stores nearby. The stores do really well and maybe at some point they start making their own products as well. They get a new place because Patrick’s apartment doesn’t have room for all of David’s sweaters. They get a dog that looks like Redmond. Maybe they end up adopting an older kid or two; maybe not. I personally don’t see them having any babies because of David’s dislike for them lmao. But he’s good with older kids like that one girl he babysat.

Alexis could help them with marketing etc; generally does more stuff with ARC, maybe helping with the motel too? I think Alexis and Ted would stay in SC as well because of Ted’s clinic, but I can see Alexis travelling for work. Maybe she opens a brick and mortar location for her business, but it probably wouldn’t be in SC because there’s no demand for it in a small town. Eventually they move out of Ted’s apartment because Ted moves the clinic to a bigger, better location where he can actually have other employees. They have 2.5 kids and a white picket fence. They definitely end up collecting a bunch of strays cats and dogs; Alexis doesn’t mind as long as they stay out of the bedroom.

I don’t think Moira would ever be happy staying there. I like to think she’ll get some kind of opportunity where she gets to get out and live for attention - either another big acting project or maybe directing something? We have no idea where the town really is, but maybe they live an hour or two from a big city so the parents move there. They’re still able to visit often which they love because they’ve realized how much they like being near their kids. 

Johnny continues to help Stevie with the motel, but I feel like in s5 we’re going to see Stevie start to do something else. I’m not sure what that is yet (obviously), so maybe Johnny takes over while she figures it out. I’m not sure if either of them stay with the motel forever, though they’ll always still be involved. I think Johnny maybe would start his own thing on the side - maybe consulting for local businesses part time?

In general, I think they all move out of the motel. Eventually the opportunity comes to sell the town but they don’t. The kids stay. The parents don’t go far.

[recipereruns]

#TBT Recipe ‘The Perfect Easter Basket – Just like Meth Mom Made for Wonder Woman and Spider Man’

Happy Easter and Happy Birthday to my brother Timmy, the pretty one, with the fair golden locks, bright blue eyes and lashes for days! Timmy’s first birthday fell on an Easter Sunday and my half birthday falls a day after his birthday so this was a very high time for me. Not as high as my dad on Johnnie Walker Black, but Easter brought plenty of excitement.

Let’s start with Jesus. Okay. Moving on to the Easter outfit. Why else does one suffer the ‘holiday church’ crowds other than to show off a fancy new Spring frock and sandals with knee socks? Or in brother’s case, a clip on tie.

Then there was the egg hunt. Meh. In the Pacific Northwest, it would be gray and drizzly and you’d be stuck standing on the lawn like the lettuce in the produce section during misting time at the supermarket.

Further, as a life-long rule, I do not compete for men, so I’m certainly not going to compete for candy.

Especially not when we have our Easter baskets at home; our Easter bunny was THE BEST. He needlepointed us baskets with our names and spelled mine right!! He put only the most minute amount of Easter ‘Grass’ the menacing cousin of glitter, in the bottom. He filled eggs with important things like M&Ms and not gross jellybean. Cadbury Mini Eggs, Cadbury Crème Eggs and solid chocolate bunnies or giant decorated peanut butter eggs from the candy store in downtown Redmond next door to Ernst Hardware.

The carrot on top of this bunny cake was the present that came along with the basket as It was a truly something we wanted; Like Wonder Woman and Spiderman Underoos!  ('Annie' Soundtrack comes a close second.)

Having suffered through a nine hour Catholic mass full of church noobs we were anxious to get home and explore our new found superpowers! We posed stoically for one picture in our Easter best, then with a furious spin (see end pose above), we were two kids standing on our couch in our underpants.

We fought imaginary crime in the living room while dad (wrapped in my magic Lasso –read jump rope) had his first Scotch since Lent.   Mom was in the kitchen trying to eek out a ham. We smelled the burning and Dad slurred, “Kids, maybe your mother should stick to Easter Baskets and Meth.”

“What? A giant Easter Bunny doesn’t hop around the world delivering the baskets?”

‘No, Wonder Woman and Spiderman, your mother does it.”

Happy f*&king Easter everyone! And Happy Birthday, Spiderman!

INGREDIENTS:

Basket of some sort – this doesn’t matter as long as you have room for the candy and don’t use brown paper sack with the word ‘basket’ written on it.

Easter Grass – they make a paper kind that’s less a nuisance than the plastic.

Small Candy – let this roll loose in the grass. M&M’s, Malt Balls, Cadbury Mini Eggs and Jelly Beans for the troubled children.

Statement Candy – Chocolate shaped like an animal, bunny , chick, lamb, egg (fetus chick form). Solid or filled is preferred to hollow. Extra points if it’s decorated with a name or flowers and you to special order it.

Small Gift – Just make sure it’s what the kid wants and not some plastic piece of sh*& not Tonka truck or hollow fake ‘Barbie’. Or some bullsh*t bubbles..

DIRECTIONS: 

Rent bunny costume.

Build the baskets and hide in your car.

Put bunny costume on while kids are sleeping.

Go get the baskets from the car at dawn.

Hop into the house making enough noise to assure that your kids wake up and catch you in the act of hiding the baskets.

Go to garage, change back into pajamas, hide the costume in the car and sneak back into the house.

[itsreaditandwow2]

Throwback Thursday Tales #3 - The County Fair 🎪 🎡 🎠

For those of you who might’ve seen one of my posts titled My Thoughts On... #13 - Memories, you might’ve seen that every summer, I would go to a county fair that was in another town from mine called Redmond, also known as Deschutes County. Well, I didn’t really go to the fair every year since I was a kid. Probably since I was about 16 years old. Well, there was this one time when I was probably 11 or 12 years old, I don’t know exactly, when I wanted to go to the Deschutes County Fair. I asked my grandparents if they could take me, and they said they couldn’t. I asked my uncle, he said the same. And the reason why, which, IMO, is a rather pointless reason, is because it was too hot outside. Yes, my grandparents and uncle said we couldn’t go to the Deschutes County Fair because of the hot weather. Well, they did say we could go when it cools down or something, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen at any point. Because, for one thing, it was summer. Which means it’s going to be hot outside, and I have no control over the temperature. Also, they were only going to have the county fair for a couple of days. So, the chances of the weather getting any less hot around that time were way slim. So, I had no choice but to wait until the next day to go to the Deschutes County Fair. So, the next day, we drove to the fairgrounds where they held the county fair, and I was really happy to actually go. But unfortunately, by the time we got to the fairgrounds, my joy was shattered in a complete instant when an employee of the fairgrounds informed us that the county fair ended, and that they already packed up the rides and the games and food stands and the fun houses and everything and hauled them away hours ago. I can’t really say that’s what the person told us verbatim. After all, this was like over a decade ago. Anyway, when I found out that the county fair ended, possibly hours before we even got ready to leave, I was upset. I was even in tears. But, eventually, I got over it after a trip to Wal-Mart. So, anyway, that’s my story about how I couldn’t go to the Deschutes County Fair due to hot weather, according to my family members who were not willing to care less about how humid it was, and attempting to go the next day only to find out that they already packed up and left. So, I hope you find this post worth reading, and be sure to, that is, if you want to, like, re-blog and/or comment. Happy Throwback Thursday!

[faroutspaceman-blog]

My weekend so far. . 1/2 -1/4/19

My weekend starts off on Wednesday because quite frankly I can't remember what I did Monday or Tuesday. Those days are now non-existent. Forever lost in the trash bin of my deep ugly brain. Here I am laying on my bed, bored out of my fucking mind. I strum a lil guitar, sing a little, but put it back away because I realize I'm still as shit at guitar no less than I was 5 minutes before i picked it up. Now the only logical thing to do is sit and stare at my ceiling loudly moaning irritated grunts of boredom at my innocent ceiling. I get up and decide to make the most extravagant fucking sandwich. Well it was subpar, I usually put lettuce on it but we were out so I settled for a greenless burger. Whatever. I go to sit back on my bed and enjoy my sandwich, when I get a call. I fucking shoot up and tap that answer call like I just felt a rush of heroin in my blood. Thank the fucking lord. My brain almost had an aneurysm from how bored I was. My friend Vanessa and her Boyfriend (who happens to be my ex lover, love that..fuck) asks me if I wanna hang.

Me: "why yes I do want to chill, but if I'm still eating my sandwich by the time you pull up, your ass is waiting at the driveway."

Them: "we have Goldfish and Arnold Palmer's tea"

Me *while stuffing the whole sandwich in my mouth* : SAY NO MAS IM READY

I get on my new Blockbuster hoodie I bought the day before (yes from the world's only Blockbuster left in my Local Bend, Oregon.) And some jeans I found on the floor. I grabbed my keys and my bag and phone. Hiked up my driveway (which let me tell ya was a whole fucking mission in itself. ) Hall ass down my street I see Vanessa's car and they're driving like maniacs down my dirt road so I obviously take advantage of the situation and throw a peace sign into the air and lay in front of her car ready for my death. She stops and I hop in and am greeted with both my promised food items. I was very happy. We drive to a friend's house about a few miles from my house because we need to refill our pods with juice because ya know.. gotta get that nicotine rush. We had 8 full pods to last us the day. (They did not last for 3 people.)

After we fill our pods, we head down to Redmond, Oregon to the local 24 great Walmart to do what ever because we were bored, I decided to challenge my friends to a game of Hide n seek, and I was the only one who hid because they were being lame. I won it took them 40mins to find me. I was in the office supply Ile. After we went to Walmart, we went to Fred Meyers. stole their WiFi and lounged on their couches until it closed. Nothing special pretty boring.

Then Johnny, Vanessa's Boyfriend, gets the bright idea to swing by his house to see if his parents have packed up to leave to Idaho. If they are gone, Johnny plans to break into his own house ( I say break In because he just got kicked out.. again for refusing to be Mormon and for smoking and going against his parents) They are not gone yet so we decide to go to our chill spot which is way up on this hill where you can see all of Redmond. We talk, watch vines, etc.

Anyway I decide to go outside and look around, as I'm looking around Vanessa joins me. We are across from the car and we look around and I find this underwire leopard print bra a smashed TV and a lone boot. So I was already like "what the actual fuck happened here?"

I still forward towards the TV and there I see it, an empty grave, it looks fresh. I turn to Vanessa and she's already booked it back to the Car with me right behind her. We lock the doors and turn on Nextflix (we were watching Chappie).

Halfway through the movie, this man in a green Subaru pulls up next to our car. This is already fuckin weird because only few know about this road.he parks his car a lil ways from ours, cuts off his lights and just idles. At first were cautious but he just seemed to be doing the same we were, so our fear eventually subsided. We finished our movie, the car was still parked, and we pull out to check to see if Hunters parents had left. As we were pulling away we saw that the man had a blond haired woman in her car, but not to be rude she looked like a hooker. He was probably waiting for us to leave and we accidentally rang this man's bill up 200 an hour. Oops.

We checked Johnnys house. They're still there. Guess we're sleeping in the car tonight. We decide to try and find some food, we pull into Domino's and order a large pizza. As we're waiting for pizza, I joke able how I've cut my Cornea in the most retarted way to Vanessa's boyfriend. I move my hands to get the hair out of my face, and the string to my hoodie cuts my eye. At first I thought there was just something in my eye so I start rubbing it. It really fucking hurts. I close my eyes and black thinking it will go away but it never does. We drive back to the chill spot and on the way back, we see that green Subaru on the main Street leaving from our spot,but I saw no girl this time. Who knows we were gone a long fucking time. Must have dropped her off a few ways back. We get back in on the hill I manage my eye to keep the excess light out of it and my friends play Madea boo 2 on next. When the movie ends we decide to just go to sleep on the hill. I'm a little pissed at this point because I just wanted to chill and not murder my eyeball.

We put her back seat down and I'm on the far edge in the backseat wishing I never came because maybe if I stayed home this wouldn't of happened. Then there's a knock on the window. Not like an accidental hit it was clearly a knock. I dont say anything, it isn't acknowledged between any of us. I try and sleep and Johnny is freaking out

"dude are you fucking hearing this. It sounds like footsteps and dragging outside."

I don't hear shit so Ignore it. Then Vanessa starts hearing it. And I know she doesn't lie so I'm flipping my shit at this point. Vanessa jumps into front seat and She whips her car off the hill so fast we was cooking.

We end up driving back to Walmart to get me eyedrops in hope it'll make it better. As Vanessa is running in to get eyedrops, this girl stops us to ask if she can use her phone because her friends ditched her at Walmart ( what fuckin assholes. ) She waits away from our car for her friend, and she quickly comes back telling us that a man asked if she wanted a ride home and a smoke.we told her to wait with us because I was suspicious that it was the man in the green Subaru.

Vanessa's comes back with the eyedrops and we leave the parking lot without the girl. I strangely don't remember saying goodbye to her but we did apparently? We park in the neighborhood and get back into the backseat of the car. We play never have I ever until 4 am. We fall asleep and wake up at 6:30 am. I'm still asleep I. The back seat when I hear Johnny's happy that his parents are gone, he tries to look for ways back into his house but it's a no bueno. They drives to lowes while I pretend to be asleep on the backseat of the car. All I heard was lockpick and Saw and I already knew someshit was about to happen.

They park back at Johnny's house and I stay in the car. About 10 minute later Johnny comes back In the car and yells "we got it". Sweet so the lock picked worked? Nope they sawed a hole in the backdoor. He is for sure going back to jail after this. Vanessa guides me inside because I'm blind and can't see. We sit on the couch i call an eye doctor in bend and make an appointment for 4pm, for Johnny's uncle that happens to coincidentally be an eye doctor. He lives a block away from Johnny. Around 12 pm. We leave Johnny's house and go look for other things to do I. The area.

We pull into this Freshman's driveway,(Tom) and lets get this straight, Tom is fucking annoying and no one likes him because he is a fein for pods and nicotine, that and he thinks he's tough shit. Proud why he got excelled. We've had to help him with every fight he's been in. Trash.

We chill at his house for a while, and eventually his step mom walks in and kicks us out "get out of my house, I don't like kids having sex on my couch"

Honestly we just came over to steal his food. His step mom is such a joke. She has the biggest crush on our friend Jason. We could honestly break apart that whole marriage and cause such a scandle with that information. Anyway it's about 2pm now, my appointment is in two hours. We drive to the park and wait.

5 minutes later Tom skates to us on his long board, asks if he can hang and throws his board I the trunk.

Fuck. Just when I thought I was gonna get away from this kid. We drive by away from the park and go towards bend for my appointment. The whole car ride he blows his burnt vape in my fave and it smells like ass. I asked him to stop. He didn't. We stop at the grocery, I stay in the car, while Tom takes a smoke break out the car while Johnny and Vanessa shop. 3 minutes pass and he asks if I want a smoke.

"no that shits nasty"

"come-on. They don't even taste like stogies. They smell soo good*

He shoves the pack of cigs in my face and I was getting pissed. The only way to get rid of his prized cigs is to threaten his prized cigs.

"if you don't get that shit out of my face rn, I swear I'll rip them all up then spit on them"

"I'll beat ur ass if you do"

I just smirked at him as he took his cigs back and closed the door.

It's about 3:45 and we head to my appointment. Vanessa directs me to the office. And it's so bright in there, I instantly start crying which makes my eyes hurt even more. I honestly have never wanted to just instantly die in a moment than now. I just want to stop hurting. I'm finally able to open my eyes and the office by is actually very nice. I fill out the paperwork and the doctor sees me right away.

I try and play it smooth, talking about how broke I am, and how much I love Jonny so he'll give me a discount be because I don't have health Insurance.

Then he says "be in remember you, we played ping pong at Johnny's house during their Mormon party."

I had flashbacks to the Mormon party, and how we won the game, how I almost fucked Johnny in his car afterwards on the way back home. But it felt wrong because Vanessa was there. Then I remembered the hole in the back door.

"yeah that was really fun. I remember we won."

He didn't day anything he just put numbing drops In My eyes and this yellow dye. He looked at my eyes and said

"you have a 3 millimeter cut on your eye. You really did some damage"

"dammit"

He writes my prescription and im ngl I almost booked it out the door. But I waited instead. He me 120 for a 2 minute visit. Asshole. After I talked so nicely with him.

Me and Vanessa went back outside but the car was gone, so was Tom and Johnny.

We called them, they're a block or two away. We waited and waited, and entertained ourselves by kicking rocks to each other that made the best ear tingling noise you could imagine.

A couple minutes later the car pulled up and this girl other girl was in the car. Wtf man I just want to go home. As soon as we get into the car everyone is aguing about where we're going and Johnny wants to Trade My weed for pods.that he didn't even ask me if he could be trade. Which pissed me off A SHIT TON. johnny, Tom and this dumb dumb bitch kept arguing about pods and juuls. I realized how absolutely fucking retarted it is and how I never want to sound like that. I save all my shit to Johnny and just said " I quit" . We drove into Safeway gave them my perscription. Told us to come back in 20 minutes. Dropped dumb bitch off at her friends no house. Johnny traded my Weed for pods. And Tom proceeded to cuss out girl we traded with calling her names like fat ass, which I did not approve of. Tom commented on something and I swear I almost killed a kid in front of my friends. Tom was lucky that night. I would have strangled him if it wasn't for my eye.

We go back to Safeway and they try and charge me $47 for a $4 perscription. Fuck that. We transfer it to Walmart. We drive home, I'm the first to get dropped off. Thank fucking god.

My mom comes into my room, and hugs me and just listens to me sleepily jabber about anything.

Last time I'll ever sacrifice my subpar sandwich for goldfish and Arnold Palmer's.

Never again