#hao angst

[slytherinshua]

MY HEART RETURNS

summary. your love is pursuing his dreams as a violinmaker in italy, leaving you to wait for his return. genre. slight angst. fluff. based on whisper of the heart. warnings. some crying. reader feels lost and alone and like she's not good enough :( not proofread. pairing. zhanghao x fem!reader. wc. 1.3k. request. no. a/n. tiánxīn = sweetheart btw. ofc hao is already perfect for the role of seiji cause he plays violin (also he looks like seiji fight me). for all the other writers out there (even tho i don't ever plan to get properly published) we all relate to shizuku so much :') her struggles are so relatable and i just love whisper of the heart so much i think its such a beautiful and underrated ghibli movie. divider by @/aquazero.

The night air nipped at your cheeks as thoughts swirled in your head. Hundreds of worries, feelings, and uncertainties followed you wherever you went, and all you could wish was to be back in high school when everything felt a bit easier. Back with Hao to occupy all your thoughts and in turn take your mind off of everything.

Sometimes you wondered if waiting was really worth it. You were doing your best to pursue your dreams, do well in your final year of university, and throw yourself and your work at different publishers, hoping that one liked you enough to give you a chance. But you felt like a constant failure in comparison to your boyfriend. You’d always thought opportunities were more beneficial than school. Hao only seemed to prove that to you.

He was working in Italy, getting valuable skills from the masters. You were still stuck in your hometown, going to the same university everyone else in your family had gone to, trapped in the same system. You wanted to get out, prove yourself, do something meaningful with your life. But did you even have the talent to? Were you even worth it?

On nights where your thoughts just wouldn’t leave you alone, you grabbed a handful of Hao’s letters and walked up the hill back to the spot where you used to watch the sunrise with him. You missed him more than anything. Without his presence, you felt lost. There was no one to ground you, no one to reassure you, no one to believe in your flimsy dreams.

You hadn’t received a new letter in a while, and you were starting to wonder if it was a post issue, or if Hao was too busy to write. You hoped you would get one soon. It was the start of Winter already, and a breeze blew past you, causing a chill to run up your spine. You hugged Hao’s old jacket closer on your body. It must be even colder in Italy…

You slid one of the old letters out from its envelope. You were always careful to keep everything intact. From the colourful wax seals to the elegantly written address, to the coarse texture of the fancy paper, everything about it was precious to you. Hao was always meticulous, and his presence could be felt from every detail of the card.

Tiánxīn, how are things back at home? Lonely. 

How is your writing? Did you finish the last 3 chapters you were struggling to write? I finished the final draft last Saturday. Are you proud of me?

I’m doing well here, although I never stop missing you. At least one feeling is mutual. 

It’s the beginning of Spring as I write this, and the flowers are starting to bloom. Every pink bud reminds me of you. How are you always so romantic, Zhang Hao?

I taught some kids how to hold a violin properly the other day— one of them almost dropped it. I swear my life flashed before my eyes. If they had broken it, I could’ve gotten kicked out. They don’t know that they’re handling a piece of wood worth thousands of dollars. As much as it scared me in the moment, spending time with the kids cheered me up. Childhood innocence is an endearing thing, don’t you think? It is. Is it bad that I wished you had gotten kicked out just so I could see you sooner? I want you to tell me everything about Italy with your own voice.

I’m starting to find beauty in things that used to annoy me. It’s a strange feeling, but I think I could get used to it. The flowers used to only make me sneeze, but now they’re a gentle reminder of who I’m living every day for. Children used to get on my nerves, but now I can only think of your baby pictures. I keep working hard every day hoping that I’ll get a break to come visit soon. I’ve been saving up for tickets. Hopefully before Winter, I’ll be back in your arms. It’s Winter now… I miss your arms around me.

Ever yours,

Hao

You could only sigh and blink back the tears that had formed on your waterline. Why did he make you miss him so much? You sniffed, from the emotions and from the cold. It was getting even later in the night, and while you didn’t want to leave your special spot, you also needed sleep.

When you got back to your cheap apartment, you sprayed some of Hao’s perfume on your pillow and changed into pyjamas. It was funny how much time went into hunting for the exact fragrance he wore; but you had been thankful for it every single day since you bought it. Any way you could to bring traces of him back to your home was worth it. You fell asleep hugging the pillow tightly and hoping that he would grace you in your dreams. 

A soft puff of air hit your nose making you scrunch it up. It woke you out of your slumber, but not enough to open your eyes yet. You were in a confused bleary state trying to figure out where it came from. You definitely didn’t leave the fan on in the middle of Winter, so why…?

“Tiánxīn, wake up.” 

You blinked your eyes open slowly, furrowing your eyebrows as the view came into focus. Light from the morning sun shone through the window, cascading down until it hit the side of a face. Hao’s face.

“Am I still dreaming?” You whispered. A lump formed in your throat at the thought that you were— you must be. How could he be right in front of you? He was still far away in Italy.

He shook his head, a smile splayed on his lips. He moved closer, his weight dipping down on the bed. You could only stare, memorising everything about him. His eyelashes fluttered as his gaze dropped to your hand and he reached to hold it. His hands were warm and the skin of his palm was soft, although his fingertips were roughened by calluses after years of playing strings. He cupped your cheek with his other hand, brushing his thumb against your skin.

“I missed you. I’m sorry it took so long for me to come visit.” He frowned slightly as he saw tears start to build in your eyes. You squeezed his hand, as if still deciphering whether he was actually real. It had truly been years since he had first gone for his apprenticeship and then got accepted full time to make violins and teach. Although you had communicated through letters, it could never compare to being with him like this. 

“It’s okay.” You tried to steady your voice, force the lump in your throat down, blink back the tears. But you couldn’t with him right there.

“Don’t cry.” He wiped your tears carefully, his touch soft as always.

“Kiss me. Please?” 

And he obliged. He would always do anything within his power to see you happy. If you told him one day to fly to the moon and bring you back a piece of it, he was sure he would find a way, just to see you smile. The feeling of kissing him again was indescribable. You’d forgotten how it felt to be kissed by his soft lips, how they melded with yours like a dream. As if you two were meant to be.

You knew you always were. Your love story, although it sometimes felt tragic, was like something out of a fairytale. You would never forget the lengths Hao went just to get your attention. How ambitious, determined, and caring he was. He was your constant motivation to keep striving to be better. 

It was hard to live for your dream while being so far apart from him. Part of you knew that he would have to go back. Maybe in a month, maybe in only a week. Maybe sooner than that. Your heart would break once again saying goodbye to him.

But, for now, as he kissed you in the morning sunlight on your bed, you felt your heart healing from his touch. The long years away from him were a small price to pay for moments as precious as these. 

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[cinnajun]

ᵕ̈ ೫˚∗: zb1 when they get jealous

a/n: this is my istj waiting room activity

notes: yujin is not included due to his age, jiwoong’s is set in the real world (aka he’s an idol), did not proofread

wc | 4.2k

jiwoong

i don’t think jiwoong gets jealous often

it’s just not his first thought when it comes to certain things LOL

but, depending on the situation, he absolutely will get jealous, but not in the way most people do

many people digest jealousy/envy as a big emotion but i don’t think it’s very big for jiwoong

and he knows that his jealousy isn’t something you should have to deal with but he doesn’t want to deal with it either so he’ll do his best to get rid of the issue without you knowing, which means making up creative ways to squash the situation

they all incorporate wherever you are

so let’s say you’re at the mall, you’re waiting for him to get out of a store, and a guy walks up to you and starts chatting you up

jiwoong will walk up to you and smile at whatever guy is flirting with you, acting completely fine

and then he’ll dip down and whisper something into your ear, and it’s usually something super unserious

“there’s a 50% sale at the ice cream shop and you get a fun cup for free”

you’re gone, he’s happy, and whatever guy was chatting you up is completely out of the picture

things are different when it comes to his members though

he always knew you liked kids and was well aware that you often volunteered to help out with kids, and he knew that you tutored high school students throughout university

nevertheless, jiwoong never thought han yujin would be his worst enemy

JIWOONG IS NORMALLY the most patient person you know—he can sit with you in a shop for an hour, watching you debate over two different mugs to buy without voicing one complaint. However, for some reason, watching you cook Yujin’s lunch is the worst thing he’s ever had to experience.

You had insisted on it after finding out he was planning on going to school after how long they’d been promoting, saying that it would be hard for him to go to school without anyone to cook him lunch. Jiwoong insisted that Hanbin probably would’ve, but you brushed him off, saying it wouldn’t take you long.

An hour and a half later, he was still sitting there, watching you cut watermelon into flowers. It was nearly 8 o’clock, and the movie you were going to was due to start at 8:45—meaning you had to leave soon.

“Are you almost done?” he asked, putting his down on the counter. You scoffed, putting the lid onto the last section of Yujin’s lunch box.

“What’s up with you?” you asked, beginning to wrap it up. “You’ve asked three times in the last hour.”

“I’m jealous that you’re spending more time fussing over Yujin’s lunch than hanging out with your boyfriend, whom you haven’t seen in a long time.”

“You’re jealous over Yujin?” you asked, exasperated, turning around and putting your hands on your hips. “He’s your kid too! You should help out! What father is jealous of their own child?”

zhang hao

there are 2 men in zb1 that don’t get jealous literally ever and hao is one of them

literally how could he be jealous when he’s zhang hao

most of the time, actually, you’re the one getting jealous (which makes sense, because he’s zhang hao)

and he always mocks you for it, which you hate

he’ll say something like “aw, do you think they’re going to steal me away from you?” and you have to resist the urge to punch him in the stomach

so when he actually gets jealous it is sooooo much fun for you

you milk it to no end. it is an opportunity you CANNOT waste

most of the time, it happens at his fancy violinist events, where you meet other people who are just as talented and impressive as him (and sometimes, they’re pretty attractive, too)

when he’s jealous, he sticks to your side and gets a little bit mean, especially towards whoever he’s jealous of

gets super touchy too

has a hand around your waist and drags you around with him just to make sure everyone gets the big picture

one day, he notices you and hanbin have been hanging out a lot all of a sudden, and it makes him really, really jealous

mostly because he can’t do his little flaunt routine, because he’s flaunted you to him enough

and then you realize he’s jealous that you and hanbin have been spending a lot of time together planning his birthday party

so obviously you capitalize on it immediately

it backfires on you

HAO WASN’T TRYING to be dramatic, but when he swung the door to Hanbin’s apartment open, having dug the spare key out from under the mat, he couldn’t help but march in like a soldier going to war.

You and Hanbin were sitting at his dining table, both of your laptops open. You had a cup of tea on the table, too, in a mug Hao knew he’d gifted Hanbin for his birthday a couple of years back.

“You let him make you tea?” he exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air like he was in some sort of drama. Both you and Hanbin stared at him in a mix of shock and confusion, wondering what in the world had caused him to barge in like that. Sure, you were beginning to pick up the fact that he was jealous of your business meetings with his best friend, but you weren’t exactly aware of how far you’d let it progress.

“Well, I made the tea—”

“You know where he keeps his tea?” he cut you off, staring at you while tapping his foot on the ground. “I am sick of this. How am I being left out by my partner and my best friend? What did I do to deserve this?”

“I think you’re getting the wrong idea,” Hanbin said, slowly closing his laptop. “We aren’t hanging out, per se, so we aren’t exactly leaving you out.”

“Then why have you spent hours upon hours together over the past week?”

You placed a hand over your mouth, trying to stop from laughing. “Hao, please be serious. What’s next week?”

His cheeks turned bright red, and you wished you could’ve got his big outburst on video.

hanbin

i am a believer that hanbin get sooo jealous (have you seen him glare at people's interaction with hao LOL)

he’s like the nicest guy on earth so there has to be one negative emotion that he feels

and it’s quite literally only over his loved ones, nothing else

will get jealous if people spend too much time with hao

will get even more jealous if people steal your attention away from him

he doesn’t even get jealous over things he should be getting jealous over, it’s things he hallucinates

“that guy stared at you a little too weirdly…”

“he was just our waiter?”

“still he was too friendly…i got bad vibes”

when hanbin gets jealous, though, it’s not very serious and never causes a problem between you two

he might hold your hand a little tighter or not be very fond of leaving you alone, but otherwise it’s not an issue

there are instances where his jealousy can get serious, and most of the time it’s pretty warranted (and this is when hanbin leans towards protective)

you’ll be watching one of his performances among a bunch of his peers and someone will get a little too touchy with you

and dancers are very hot so he might get a little insecure too

he will stomp over to you, sweaty and tired, and drag you away without saying a word to whoever was chatting you up

other than that his jealousy is kind of cute

hanbin doesn’t view any of the boys as enemies but sometimes matthew can be super cute

and while he considers matthew one of his best friends sometimes he forgets that matthew is just like that and isn’t trying to woo you

matthew, however, is well versed in the art that is hanbinism and is immune to it

YOU KNOW HANBIN like the back of your hand. He’s sweet, pretty, and enjoys being around the people he loves. And, you know for a fact Matthew is one of the people he loves. Nevertheless, when he skips up to you two with a white rose he picked, Taerae in tow, you can practically see a vein pop out of Hanbin’s head.

“Look at how pretty this is!” he smiled, and you nodded, agreeing with him. “Taerae and I found a bush of them, and I figured I’d pick one to give to you.”

You hear Hanbin scoff, and, feeling panic rush up your throat, you turn to him with horror flowing through you. The look in his eyes is dangerous, and a sort of shallow smile appears on his face—you don’t like it one bit. You turn back to Matthew, who seems completely unphased, and instead keeps talking.

“Here,” he said, holding it out to Hanbin. He stares at it, raising his eyebrows in confusion.

“I thought you were giving it to [First]?”

“Huh? That would be weird,” Matthew replies, tilting his head. You hear Taerae begin to laugh, likely at Hanbin, and you have to hold back a little chuckle as well. “Wouldn’t you be the one to give a rose to them? Anyway, here you go.”

Hanbin, dumbfounded, takes the rose from Matthew’s hand, and he and Taerae disappear off into the distance.

matthew

matthew is #2 of men in zb1 who don’t get jealous often

literally doesn’t have the brain capacity for it

he’s like a universal friend, and universal friends don’t get jealous of anybody, nor do they distrust their significant others

a more appropriate word to use would be uncomfortable

at least that’s what matthew says when he gets jealous LOL

he genuinely doesn’t think he feels jealous because he doesn’t have any worry that whoever is talking to you is going to “steal” you away from him, but he certainly doesn’t appreciate anybody hardcore flirting with you

he can handle a “you’re so pretty” or an “i love your outfit” but if someone is persisting and he can tell you’re uncomfortable (both factors have to be present, or he’ll just let you handle it yourself) he will do his best to shut it down

but in the matthew way

so he walks over to you with a big smile on his face and starts talking to you like he normally would

“hey, babe, i lost you for a second”

whoever’s talking to you literally can’t keep going because of how nice matthew is

“oh, who’s this? it’s nice to meet you! i’m [first]’s boyfriend, matthew”

they’re gone within 2 minutes and matthew is feeling successful

he’ll probably give you a kiss on the cheek afterwards just to hammer home his point

he will, however, admit that he gets jealous of the other members lol

it’s mostly because he considers them his friends, though, so the idea that you’d be into one of them is scary to him

as a result, he gets a little wary when he stumbles upon you chatting with jiwoong at a party

BEFORE MATTHEW LEFT to go get a drink, you were sitting on the couch, playing a game on your phone. He planned to tell you that you could leave after he finished the drink, but when he returned, Jiwoong was sitting across from you, speaking with you.

The smile on your face was genuine, and you seemed overjoyed that you weren’t bored anymore. And, subconsciously, Matthew took it as you being happy that Jiwoong was talking to you, and not because you were glad you wouldn’t have to drag Matthew away from his friends anymore (which was the truth).

He sat back down next to you, sitting on the edge of the seat and putting his cup down on the coffee table. You smiled at him, and Jiwoong said his hellos, to which Matthew replied less than enthusiastically.

“We were just chatting about the new art exhibit that opened up at the museum. You know, the one we went to last week?”

“Yeah, I remember,” he said, taking a long sip of the drink. You raised an eyebrow, finally picking up that Matthew was feeling a bit jealous. “You planning on going again, or something?”

“Nope,” Jiwoong cut in, leaning back in his chair. “Actually, [First] was just talking about how much she enjoyed going with you, as you seemed to like it a lot. She said your eyes were sparkling the entire time.”

Matthew shut up quick after that, and you didn’t mention it ever again.

taerae

taerae’s jealousy is silent

you won’t know he’s jealous until well after the event has occurred

he might bring it up in passing weeks later and you’re absolutely dumbfounded

mostly because you had no clue

“you were jealous?”

“yeah, he kept staring at your lips and was getting super touchy with you. how would i not be jealous?”

you think about the interaction for hours afterward, you skim through all the memories, and you cannot figure out where he conveyed he was jealous

he’s so good at masking any negative emotion that when you manage to notice his jealousy it’s almost a little bit scary

you’ll be talking with someone, it doesn’t matter who, and you’ll look over at him for a second and notice this weird look in his eyes

and then you’ll be hyperaware of how everything he says has this sharp edge to it

little jabs that neither you or whoever you’re talking to would be able to pick up unless they were actively looking for hostility

lowkey it’s kind of attractive LOL

taerae’s usually the picture of “kind” so seeing him go into a lockdown mode is a bit fun for you, even if it’s barely noticeable

after the event that made him jealous he’s super touchy with you which is also fun for you

because taerae gives gooood hugs and is comfortable to lay on

so, long story short, if he’s ever jealous of the boys you don’t know until afterward

sometimes even weeks after the fact

and obviously when you were fawning over zhang hao after his violin recital, which taerae had taken you to, you weren’t exactly aware of the way he was staring at hao

WHEN TAERAE GRABS your hand about a minute into your drive, lacing all of your fingers together and pulling your hand onto his lap, your jaw drops. You turn to look at him with shock on your face, trying to find the words to say. “No way,” you gasped, putting your other hand over your mouth. 

He looks over at you for a brief second, confused as to why you’re suddenly making such a big deal that he was holding your hand. “What? I don’t understand.”

“You were jealous? Of Hao?” you exclaimed, letting your hand drop from your mouth. “Why? I mean, he did well, did he not? Was I too complimentary? Do I need to reel it back next time?”

“What? No, you were just being nice. Where did you get the idea I was jealous?”

“You say that, but in a month and a half, you’re going to be like, ‘You know what made me super jealous?’ and then you’re going to drop three bombs on me,” you replied. “And this is going to be included. So, just say it now, so we can get it over with.”

Taerae blinked a couple of times, tightening his grip on your hand. “Okay, maybe I was a little jealous—”

You wrenched your hand away from his, clapping excitedly. “Oh, I’m a genius! I have a degree in Taeraeology now, seriously.”

“What in the world is Taeraeology?”

ricky

when ricky gets jealous it’s like not a competition

he just shuts the situation down

i mean he’s so tall and so gorgeous that anybody who tries anything with you is immediately so intimidated the moment he does anything, he barely even has to talk

he literally has a neck tattoo like that’s terrifying

as a result he does not have the time to get seriously jealous because anyone who’s flirting with you is sprinting away the moment they lay eyes on him approaching you

most of the time people don’t even try anything anyway because they see you with him before you’re separated

for the few that are willing to stand up to ricky, it’s pretty funny for you to watch

“[first], who’s this?” and you watch the competitor cartoon-gulp right in front of you

they maybe last about 15 seconds before they bid you goodbye out of pure intimidation like good for you ricky

if it’s one of the days where he looks incredibly cute and soft (you know what i’m talking about) things tend to go south because ricky is awkward and his strong suit is rbf

at which point you end up having to be the one to be like “okay, me and my boyfriend are going to head out now!” LOL

among the jebis the only one ricky is going to get jealous of is gyuvin and that’s because they’re the same age and very close

he knows gyuvin will never make a move on you but that doesn’t stop him from getting jealous when gyuvin is taking up too much of your attention

and he’ll straight up tell him to fuck off too LOL

riyangis i get you

GYUVIN LOOKS LIKE he’s about to burst into laughter as Ricky stands next to you, arms crossed and eyes narrowed. He never takes Ricky’s jealousy seriously, which you understand why, given the fact that they’re best friends, and he has absolutely no interest in you whatsoever.

“You should go home now,” Ricky insists, motioning towards the front door. “I think we’ve hung out for long enough today.”

It was partially your fault for introducing a topic Ricky wasn’t versed in, but Gyuvin was the only other person you knew had watched the show you were watching, and you were itching to talk about it with somebody who understood. But, you’d pushed it too far, and he’d gotten a bit upset that you were focusing on Gyuvin when he had barged into your date.

“Aw, but [First] is my friend, too.”

“And, if we were both drowning, she’d choose me over you. What’s your point?”

Gyuvin burst into laughter, clutching his stomach as he wobbled towards the door. You held back your laughter as best you could, nearly losing it as Gyuvin struggled to put on the pair of bright yellow Crocs he decided to wear when he walked over. He opened the door and slammed it shut, yet you could still hear him laughing outside.

Then, you couldn’t hold it back anymore. You laughed so hard that you also had to hold your stomach, and Ricky marched away from you, ignoring the halfassed apologies that fell from your lips.

gyuvin

gyuvin isn’t usually a jealous guy but he can get jealous, as opposed to hao and matthew who virtually never get jealous

when he gets jealous though it’s somewhat upsetting

it usually means something happened that wounded his pride or made him feel insecure, which you don’t enjoy obviously

so 99.9% of the time, if gyuvin is jealous, it’s because one of the members did something to/with you that he wasn’t super okay with

it’s never anything minute, like one of them liking an instagram post or something stupid, rather something happening under his nose

he loves and respects them a lot so the idea that they did something with his s/o without him knowing makes him super duper unhappy

and then he’ll start to think that there’s something they have that he didn’t, so he gets a bit insecure, too

but he absolutely will convince himself it’s not a big deal so then he’s just in an extra bad mood for the rest of the day

you usually have to squeeze whatever’s wrong out of him and, when you manage to, you feel really bad

because usually whatever happened to upset him was something you thought you’d addressed with him and/or thought he knew about

like ricky, he gets most jealous over things that happen between you and ricky

because you’re all close in age and gyuvin and ricky spend all of their time together, you’re obviously friends with him too

and, in ricky’s seasonal instagram wrap up post, he notices a selfie of you two in what he thinks was a hangout you had together without him knowing based on the background

it ruins his day so fast :( but you make sure to patch up the misunderstanding

GYUVIN HATES THE WAY HE FEELS as he gears up to speak, twiddling his thumbs while you sit across from him at the table, a frown painting your face. He doesn’t like it when you look sad, and he doesn’t like feeling this way or addressing that he feels it. So, when the time comes where he has to talk about it, it eats him up from the inside out.

“Did you hang out with Ricky? Without me?”

You immediately furrow your eyebrows, as if you’re confused. “Not that I know of? I barely even text Ricky outside of the group chat the three of us have. Where’d you get that idea?”

Embarrassed, Gyuvin decides to pull up the post, turning his phone to face you. You take it from his hands, bringing it closer to your face so that you can get a better look at it. Then, recognition floods your features, and your frown turns into a smile. “That was when we roadtripped to the beach. Not pictured here are you and Taerae, who were getting us coffee.”

Gyuvin snatches the phone back, feeling even more embarrassed. He zooms in on the background parts, ignoring you and Ricky, quickly realizing that the filter Ricky put on the picture made the water look much bluer than it actually had been, leading him to believe you’d gone on your own separate beach trip. Feeling the blood rush to his cheeks, Gyuvin smiled crookedly.

“My bad.”

gunwook

i actually struggled with this

on one hand i don’t think gunwook would get jealous easily

he’s a very reasonable boyfriend and has quite literally never wronged you

on the other hand i do think he would get jealous somewhat frequently

in the same way as taerae, it’s very quiet jealousy, but you will literally never know with him

he won’t ever bring it up after it happens and will just. move on

he also might get a little snarky with whoever approached you afterwards, but never when you’re around, so you are none the wiser

if you find out gunwook got jealous, you are finding out from other people, which you think is absolutely insane

one day you’ll be like cordially chatting with gyuvin and he’ll bring up this one time gunwook got super mega jealous over one of your guy friends and how it haunted him for months and you’re like ??? what

gyuvin is like you DIDN’T know? and then you learn about every single time gunwook has gotten jealous and then told him + yujin + ricky about it

apparently it was so obvious to the boys that hanbin literally asked him about it

you’re flabbergasted 

so then you approach gunwook like “wtf is this?” and he’s like

“oh yeah”

what do you mean OH YEAH?

you’re actually so shocked

gunwook isn’t the type to get jealous of the boys though like that just straight up won’t happen

doesn’t matter who you’re talking to, how much time you spend with them, etc

he knows they’d never pull something with you ever so you could literally go on a remote vacation to the amazon rainforest with NO cell service with like hanbin and he wouldn’t give a shit

TAERAE WAS BUSY, which meant you’d dragged Hanbin along with you to go shopping for Christmas presents for the boys. You’d been dating Gunwook long enough that you felt like it was a good way to show gratitude for them, and Hanbin agreed to take you to the mall to get the gifts.

Of course, you couldn’t take Gunwook, because you were planning on buying a good chunk of his gift, too, which meant you hadn’t told him where you were going. So, when he called, you were somewhat apprehensive to pick up.

Hanbin, on the other hand, looked terrified.

“Can I come over? I’m bored,” he asked, and you held back the urge to laugh as you stared at Hanbin, who looked like he’d seen a ghost.

“I’m Christmas-present shopping with Hanbin, actually. Sorry.”

Hanbin’s jaw dropped, likely at the fact that you just came right out with it, but you weren’t worried in the slightest. “Oh, okay. That’s cool. Have fun. Tell Hanbin I said hello.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too. Bye.”

He hung up, and Hanbin’s jaw dropped farther. “He just…doesn’t care? Like at all?”

You gave him an inquisitive look, as if you didn’t understand what he was implying. “Is he supposed to?"

thank you for reading !

tags: @happysmileybee

[lovepookie]

Hi i’m not sure if this is where i request but could you do sort of angsty zb1 texts? I also have a couple more ideas in mind if you wanted more requests!!

♡ zerobaseone angsty texts messages — after an argument.

♡ nano note: HELLO ANON! when i tell you this was therapeutic to write 😮‍💨 also, i wasn’t sure where to take this so i decided to do different types of arguments as the topic! i wrote to the above song and balled my eyes out lmao. also yes! that is where i accept requests from! feel free to ask for more specific ideas and i can give you longer texts too!! ty for requesting anon! muah muah muah! 🥹🫶🏻

♡ warnings: heavy angst, fighting/arguments mentioned, mentions of bullying, mentions of outbursts, insecure reader in some and insecure jebes in others, emotional apologies, pet names, yujin’s is platonic/friendship, please lmk if i missed any!

[xzinbdg]

hi love! can i ask for reader x ot9 zb1 are in a group chat and suddenly someone blurts out which one of them reader likes and what are their reaction? thankss in advance I already love your writings and can I be 🍓 - anon?

I AM SO SORRY THAT IM DOING THIS SO LATE 😭😭😭😭 i made it kinda separately??? i hope you like it 🥹 thank u sm and i would love to have you as 🍓 anon! 💕

zerobaseone reaction to you having a crush on them!

୨ৎ jiwoong

୨ৎ zhanghao

୨ৎ hanbin

୨ৎ matthew

୨ৎ taerae

୨ৎ ricky

୨ৎ gyuvin

୨ৎ gunwook

୨ৎ yujin

zerobaseone masterlist

[hannism]

TEXTS WITH JUNIOR YUJIN

synopsis yujin, the junior under you in yearbook always got on your nerves. little did you know he had a reason for always annoying you.

p junior!yujin x senior!reader g profanity, younger yujin reader’s only a few months older tbh, frenemies to lovers

link to navi — PLS REBLOG !

notes ; love love yujin

[starvity]

heyy! you can totally ignore this is ur not comfy but i’m sick (and delusional) rn so how would zb1 react to reader having a nose bleed when they’re hiding their sickness 🫶

anyways i love all your work so farrr <33

— ☆ zb1 reacting to you getting a nose bleed

gn!reader x zb1 (ot9)

genre: slight angst, fluff // warnings: BLOOD obviously, arguments/yelling, tears uhuh. reader is sick and tired...

author’s note: get well soon anon :(( i am once again writing angst today what is happening!!! thank you for requesting though hehe and let me call jebewon real quick and tell them to take care of you!!! (★ω★)/ [requested♡]

ੈ✩‧₊˚ jiwoong

he would totally panic but only internally. in reality, he will try to act composed to take care of you and your nose bleed. will get you some tissues and a warm towel to wipe the blood stains off your nose. once he made sure the nose bleed had stopped, his panic mode will comeback and he's going to ask you thousands of questions!! if you tell him that it's not the first time that it has happened this week he will obviously lecture you and force you to cuddle with him until you get better. "didn't i tell you to stay in bed?" jiwoong asks. "i'm just going to open the door, calm down." you chuckle, trying to get behind your boyfriend who was standing in front of the door, blocking it. a sudden smile breaks the serious look on his face. he lifts you up and throws you on the bed. "i'll be your legs for this week so stay here, will you?"

ੈ✩‧₊˚ hao

very confused when you were casually talking on the couch and he notices the blood dripping from your nose. probably like :O for a few seconds before you kindly ask him to get you some tissues. trips and bumps into furniture a few times on his way to the bathroom because he's confused and panicked. however, when you tell him you've been kinda sick but you were hiding it from him, prepare yourself to get yelled at lmao. of course, not to the point to make you cry but i see him just screaming some incoherent sentences (definitely curses in chinese under his breath lol) about how you need to take your health seriously. in the end, he will softly kiss you and make a promise to never hide anything from the other again :]

ੈ✩‧₊˚ hanbin

leader mode activated!!!! as soon as he noticed your nose was bleeding, he tells you not to panic as he gets a tissue from his bag. he softly places it on your face and explains to you what's happening. you might think he's the calmest one but his eyes can't lie!! he's looking at you with such a concerned face when you tell him your health hasn't been the best lately. you chuckle, letting him know that he doesn't need to worry. he sighs and takes your hands in his, asking you to please tell him when you're sick so he can help you with chores, work, etc. throughout the week, when you get up to cook, clean or even go out instead of resting, he will call your name sternly and point to the bed with a small nod, indicating you to go lie down before he does it himself.

ੈ✩‧₊˚ matthew

super confused n°2. when he notices you rushing to the bathroom from your desk, he doesn't really question it. but when he goes to wash his hands and sees the blood-stained tissues in the trashcan, he knew something wasn't right. matthew comes up from behind you, who was super focused writing on your laptop, and wraps his arms around your torso. he starts pressing some kisses along your jawline, suggesting you to take a break. when you don't seem to move at his words, he turns your chair around and cups your cheeks with his hands. upon seeing the tired look on your face, he asks if you've been sick lately. when you tell him you were but didn't want to tell him, he takes you in his arms and carries you to the bed. you end up talking a bit (mainly matthew ranting about how much he loves you and how you should take care of yourself) before falling asleep.

ੈ✩‧₊˚ taerae

takes it extremely seriously. your nose starts bleeding again and you sigh, grabbing another tissue. the box was almost empty with the amount of times it had happened this week. you reassure taerae that you were used to it as his eyes widen. he cannot believe you've been hiding the fact that you were sick from him and worse, that you lied; saying you were fine whenever he asked you how you were doing. i wouldn't even be surprised if a small argument occured because i feel like taerae would base his relationships on trust and you hiding something from him will definitely hurt him a little. probably gives you the silent treatment for 3 hours (cause he's just dramatic like that) before coming back to your shared room to check up on you. when he discovers that you still haven't taken a break he throws a blanket on your face and drags you to the bed (on the floor, if he has to). wouldn't talk for a good 20 minutes before sighing and telling you to never hide anything from him again. he also apologizes for the small fight and kisses your face over and over again <3

ੈ✩‧₊˚ ricky

like every friday, ricky was taking you on a date. you had fallen sick at the beginning of the week and you kinda wish you could’ve staid home today. but since it was the only day you two could really hang out, you didn't want to cancel your plans. you were sitting on the bed, waiting for ricky who takes forever to get ready. your head starts spinning so you briefly close your eyes in hope that the feeling will go away. you hear him softly call your name, asking your opinion on which tie would suit him better. and you know how they get nose bleeds when they see someone attractive in anime? well today, ricky thought that it could also happen in real life. he starts to laugh, saying how your body can't handle his charm, in a teasing voice. when you tell him it's because you've been sick though, his smile drops immediately. he can't really hide the embarrassing blush on his ears as he apologizes for this bad "joke" (he was completely serious). "then let's stay inside today, yeah?" he suggests, opening his arms for a hug.

ੈ✩‧₊˚ gyuvin

another dramatic one omg... i also see him being kinda terrified of blood so he will probably throw you some tissues from a distance, his face turned away from you and his eyes shut. you can't help but laugh at his behaviour while he screams that it's not something to joke about and that he will call his mom to drop you off at the hospital. "i've just been feeling kinda sick, don't worry about it", you confess but he suddenly grabs your face, shaking it slightly "why didn't you tell me!?", he screams. gyuvin abruptly stops his action, his face growing dark again when he thinks about the possibility of another nose bleed happening from shaking you like this. later, you end up watching a movie together, finally allowing yourself to rest. you can't help but giggle every 5 minutes when you turn your head just to see gyuvin staring at you with big eyes "are you REALLY sure you're okay??". please kiss him and tell him you're alright for the nth time today because my man is STRESSED.

ੈ✩‧₊˚ gunwook

see, gunwook is super attentive so i don't think it would be so easy to hide the fact that you were sick. you noticed how he would check up on you more often, and how he would offer to do the chores for you (even though he would always whine when he had to do them). when you kept telling him that you were alright, he tried to appear less concerned but so many questions were still running at the back of his mind. his assumptions were finally revealed to be true as a drop of blood lands on your sheet while you were studying together. you try to hide your face from him, quickly grabbing a tissue to clean the blood. "let me see." he cups your cheeks, obliging you to look at him. you had never seen him so serious and if you were being honest, the unusual frown on his face was scaring you a little. you spoke first, admitting that you've been sick and apologizing for not letting him know. gunwook shushes you with a peck on your forehead as he sees your eyes water. you spend the entire night talking about your concerns, holding and comforting each other. <3

ੈ✩‧₊˚ yujin

doesn't really make it a big deal. or at least that's how it looks like. yujin has been observing how hard you've working and how you would look a bit more tired than usual. you would reply late to his texts, ignore his calls because you were "sleeping", tell him that you can't meet up because you're busy...again... he was once again having trouble falling asleep tonight as many thoughts were clouding his mind. he had even asked his mom and his friends about how to bring the subject up with you. looking at the time on the clock, he gets up and decides to walk to your house, not knowing if you would even be awake to let him in. you open the door, a tissue stuffed into your nostril and awkwardly greet yujin. he stares at you blankly before letting himself in and closing the door behind him. without a word, he hugs you "you're stupid", his voice sounds weak. you apologize, rubbing his back as you hear his sobs, he must have been so worried to see you like this. "promise me to never overwork yourself again when you're sick", he pulls away and dries his tears. "i promise", you murmurs and interlocks pinkies.

[ivrousae]

✦ Apocalypse

Arguments with ZB1

Hyung line | Read Maknae line version here (on progress.)

- Genre: angst, hurt, comfort, fluff

- Pairings: zb1 x reader

- Warnings: swearing, explicit language, mentions of drinking, etc. ! This writing might be sensitive for some people !

- a/n: someone requested this and i wrote it a while ago..this fic has been ROTTING in my drafts yo😭😭 hope yall like it lol, i’ll write maknae line soon ok

Playlist:

- Jiwoong: Cry - CAS,

- Hao: Anaheim - NIKI

- Hanbin: Understand - Keshi & Seasons - Wave To Earth

- Matthew: Promise - Laufey

- Taerae: Try Again - Jaehyun, d.ear

✧ Jiwoong

- Your relationship with Jiwoong is fine, but there are days when the two of you have your hectic days, and this week is one of them. Jiwoong is busy, making him stressed and often frustrated, and the same goes for you, the whole week would be filled with sudden arguments coming around here and there, and it’s about time that you’ve had enough. “You know, I wish we never-” “Don’t say it, you know you shouldn’t be saying things you don’t mean,” Jiwoong said coldly, cutting off your sentence before you could continue, “Well, what if I mean it?” you forced out a chuckle, “No you don’t y/n, stop it” Jiwoong sighed, piercing your eyes with his strong yet meaningful gaze.

Without realizing it, you were shouting at Jiwoong, releasing all of the emotions you’ve held the whole week, “Why couldn’t you be there? I was there when you were stressed, I was there when you needed me but you weren’t there, Jiwoong? Where were you when I was all alone? Where were you when I needed you the most? Huh?” you said, tears falling from your eyes as you pushed Jiwoong’s shoulder, “Babe…” he slowly said, realizing that he messed up, realizing that he hurt you. Jiwoong placed one of his hands on your shoulders, the other hand placed on your cheeks, wiping off your tears as he kissed your forehead, “I’m sorry, let’s talk it out slowly, yeah?” he said, his tone full of guilt “Give me some time” You stepped away from him, making your way to your bedroom before locking yourself in.

[ read Jiwoong’s text before continuing ]

After replying to his texts, you went out of your bedroom to eat the dish he cooked in the kitchen. As you made your way toward the kitchen, you found Jiwoong lying down on the couch, you sighed, grabbing the plate of food that he prepared and placed it on the table in the living room before sitting down beside Jiwoong, “Hey” you sighed, taking a bite of the food “Hey babe, have you gotten the time you needed?” he asked softly, sitting himself down to sit closer to you, you nodded, avoiding eye contact, “Look, I’m sorry, yeah? I was so carried away with work, that I didn’t notice I was hurting you so much, I’ll be here for you now, so I’m sorry, babe” “It’s fine, I was carried away with work too that I got frustrated, I just don’t want to fight with you again” You looked at Jiwoong who already had his eyes on you “I love you,” he pulled you into a hug, rubbing your back and kissing the top of your head “And I always will”

────────────

✧ Hao

- With the same reason as Jiwoong, you and Hao often fight because one or both of you would get carried away from stress. When Hao is busy with work, and you’d also be busy with your work, the two of you would get sensitive, you’d talk back, and he’d talk back, and then it’d just turn into a big fight.

“Can you not?” Zhang Hao said as he stopped typing from his laptop, his voice slightly raised as his frustration grew “Huh? I was just trying to get something” you replied, it was clear that you were also frustrated and annoyed at that point, “You keep on coming back and forth, I'm trying to work on something, stop being so fucking loud” he spoke out again, his tone filled with anger, “What the fuck, Hao? I’m trying to work on something too right now, I’m sorry for being loud but can’t you say it nicer?” You scoffed, the volume of your voice raising and raising, “No, I can’t say it nicer because you’ve been such a bother this whole time, Y/n.” he shouted “Hao?..” you quietly spoke as his words pierced you straight in the heart “Get out” he firmly said, “Why are you like this?” You said as tears fell down your face, you walked out of the door before slamming it, leaving your boyfriend all alone.

Hao felt a little guilty about his words, but he quickly ignored his feelings and continued with his work, he kept on getting distracted yet again, but this time, it was because of the sobs he heard coming from you in your bedroom.

[ read Zhang Hao’s text before continuing ]

After replying to your text, he went over to the kitchen to make you your favorite drink before knocking on your door “Baby, it’s me” he softly said “What do you want?” you replied, your voice still shaky from crying so much “I want to apologize, I made your favorite drink too” he sighed “Just say it from there, I don’t want to see you yet” you spoke out, Hao took a deep breath, he wanted to see you, but he knew that you needed your space, “I’m sorry, you know how I get when I’m stressed, I’m sure you’re tired of having to deal with me when I get like this babe. I’m so proud of you for being able to be so strong, I’m proud of you for also working so hard, and I’m proud of you for loving me. I’ll treat you better starting from now, so let me hold you, please?” he begged, his voice starting to get shaky mid-way.

As he stood in front of your bedroom door, he saw the door open, showing you with your red eyes, you walked closer to him, pulling him into a hug, and he did the same to you. The two of you hugged each other for a long time before letting go of each other “Let’s get ready to sleep, it’s getting late” Hao smiled, tucking back your hair behind your ears.

“I love you so much” he spoke out, giving your lips a quick peck.

────────────

✧ Hanbin

You had a team dinner after work, but you didn’t tell your boyfriend Hanbin about it because you didn’t think that it would be that big of a deal.

But after the event, you opened the door of your front porch and entered your house late at night. When you walked in, you saw Hanbin sitting down on one of the chairs in the kitchen aisle, his eyes focused on his phone “Hey bin” you quietly said, “Why didn’t you read my messages?” he replied as he looked at you, his voice slightly annoyed and his face straight, his eyes showed mixed emotions, from worried, to anger, to sadness, to tiredness.

You showed a confused expression on your face, “you texted me? I didn’t get the notification I'm sorry” you apologized while checking your phone, realizing that he texted you many times while being worried, “Look at the time, where were you this whole time?” he asked, his tone sounded angry but his volume was still low, “I had a team dinner, I didn’t think that it was a big deal so I didn’t tell you” you replied “Team dinner? You went to a team dinner and didn’t tell me because you didn’t think it was a big deal? Y/n, you could’ve gotten drunk, what if something happens to you? Huh? What if you get hurt, or they do something to you?” he spoke out, his volume getting louder and louder “Hanbin, it isn’t a big deal, I’m here now and nothing happened so calm down” “The least you could do is inform me, is it that hard to text me before hand? It’s already midnight and you just got home a few minutes ago, you know I hate it when you don’t inform me about things like this” he brushed up his hair that was covering his eyes before placing both of his hands on the counter, breaking the eye contact he had with you “Okay fine, I’m sorry, I’m tired right now so just stop making this such a big deal” “This isn’t the first time, y/n” “Oh my god, Sung Hanbin I said I’m tired, leave me alone” You shouted, walking yourself out the door, leaving your boyfriend standing alone.

As you stormed out of your house, you drove yourself to a place that could calm you down, you felt bad for storming out on Hanbin like that, but you were too tired to listen to him, you know he was worried about you, but you still needed time.

You sat down on the bench beside the river, focused on the sight of the night sky before feeling your phone vibrate from notifications.

[ Read Hanbin’s text before continuing ]

You stayed for a few more minutes before driving yourself back home. When you arrived and entered your house, Hanbin rushed over to you before hugging you “I’m sorry sweetheart, I was just worried about you, I didn’t want you to get hurt because I care so much about you and I love you. I’m sure you’re tired so I prepared the bath for you, go clean yourself up and talk with me, yeah?” he spoke softly, placing soft rubs on your back and your head “You didn’t have to do that, Bin” you replied as your chin rested on his shoulders “Well I already did” he laughed “Again, I’m sorry” he sighed “It’s fine, you did nothing wrong” you let go of the hug before rubbing his shoulders

“I love you” he enunciated and pulled you into a meaningful kiss.

────────────

✧ Matthew

Matthew was going out with his friends and he promised to be home by 8 PM, so you stayed up and waited for your boyfriend to come back home. However, it seemed like he had forgotten his promise because the time was already 10.30 PM and there were no signs of Matthew yet.

The time was 00.08 AM and you heard the front door open, by that time, you were already annoyed at your boyfriend who forgot his promise, so you stayed in your room, not wanting to go downstairs and see him. Your bedroom door opened, showing your boyfriend with his black top and jeans, “Hey babe, you’re still awake?” he said lazily as he placed down his hat, you replied with a hum, too frustrated to reply with words, “Forgot I promised to come home earlier, my bad” he said, even with his apology, it seemed like he wasn’t so sincere with his words. “Why did you come home so late?” you asked “I was out with my friends, what did you expect? You could’ve just slept and not waited for me, you know?” he replied “Of course, I waited for you, but then you weren’t home yet and I couldn’t sleep so I continued waiting?” you scoffed “Well I’m home, so just go to sleep and stop being so dramatic” he groaned, leaving you to change in the bathroom.

As he came back from the bathroom, you tried to talk to him about it but he completely ignored you, not wanting to talk to you, “What the fuck Matthew” you sighed, seeing Matthew getting up and leaving the room again.

Matthew, who tried to ignore you, seemed to be struggling when he went downstairs to leave you alone, he tried to distract himself by watching the TV, but he’d constantly fidget with his fingers, or he’d constantly let out a deep sigh, signaling that he had a lot in mind. He gave up on trying to ignore you and quickly pulled out his phone from his pockets to text you

[ Read Matthew’s text before continuing ]

Matthew went back upstairs, knocking on your bedroom door before entering “Babe” he softly said “Hm?” you replied “Can I hug you?” he asked, making you chuckle “Why?” “Look, I’m sorry, I know I was wrong, I just felt tired and I said something that hurt you” he apologized “It’s okay, thank you for apologizing sincerely” you replied, going over to Matthew to hug him “Fuck, I love you so much” he muttered, kissing the top of your head in between your hug

────────────

✧ Taerae

Fighting was never a big thing in your relationship with Taerae. When you guys fought, it was always about something unserious and silly, and there were barely any times where the fight gets BIG.

But the two of you often bicker with each other, especially because you often get sulky with Taerae. This time, Taerae jokingly said something about your cooking, of course, it was a joke, because honestly speaking, he thinks your cooking was so good, but it was natural for the both of you to make joking comments and bully each other from time to time, it’s like your love language with each other. But what he didn’t realize, is that you’ve had a little bit of a long day that day, and you were already in a bad mood before he commented about your cooking. You knew he was just joking, but you were still feeling a little mad, you didn’t feel the best after all.

“Is it that bad?” you asked after Taerae commented on your cooking “Yes” he laughed “I’m joking babe, it’s good” he smiled, patting your shoulder as an apology, but you already felt bad, you showed a sad yet frustrated expression on your face, avoiding eye contacts with your boyfriend “Hey, babe, I was joking, I’m sorry, it’s really good” he apologized again, this time, with words, “Still” you whined “Aw, baby don’t get mad, I’m sorry” he squished your cheeks, but it didn’t make you feel any better “I’m going upstairs, enjoy your food” you rolled your eyes, leaving the table before going upstairs into your room.

“Fuck, I shouldn’t have said that” Taerae groaned at himself when he saw you leave, massaging the temple of his head before finishing the food you have cooked him. He wanted to go upstairs and talk to you but he knew you just needed your time, so he let you stay inside your room before he couldn’t hold himself back anymore.

[ Read Taerae’s text before continuing ]

After reading Taerae’s text, you wiped off your tears and went downstairs to see him after you felt a little better, Taerae immediately stood up from the couch when he saw you walking downstairs “BABY” he shouted, running over to you before hugging you and kissing your lips “I’m sorry, I love you so much, please tell me when you‘ve had a long day, okay?” he comforted you before planting one last kiss on your jaw.

[nyuoqi]

            — EXES ALERT     ౨ৎ     KTR

✸ SYNOPSIS !  : in which you and taerae went all the way back to the last year of middle school where the two of you were painfully in love with each other yet refused to put on any label because you guys thought this was more fun, and it went on all the way to the second year of high school. well that was until you ghosted him

or in which your situationship from four years ago happens to be your partner for a romance drama

PAIRING  𐙚  actor! kim taerae x idol! fem!reader

GENRE  ⊹  socmed + written chapters, celeb! au, kinda exes to lovers, fluff, humour, maybe angst, they have communication issues

FEATURING ⋆ zb1! jiwoong + hanbin + mathew + yujin + hao, cix! jinyoung, aespa! all, leeserafim! chaewon, the boyz! changmin, stayc! seeun, tiot! junhyeon p1h! intak

STATUS  𖦹 completed !

🎞️  devils in misery  .  actors nation  . why are we screaming

001 1 like for taerae

002 cute nerd boy from finance

003 #employmentera

004 jinyoung hate club

005 what the fuck 🔥🔥

006 nurse hes out again

007 bad idea (smau + written 1.04k wc)

008 gay dog

009 jazz music stops

010 kiss my ass

011 i aint reading all that

012 shit 🏃‍♂️💨💨

013 watch ur back

014 yntaeraejunhyeonhanbin

015 dinner at cheonanz (smau + written 1.2k wc)

016 crazy bitch smiling

017 mustard head

018 passenger princess jinyoung

019 jinyoung on the loo

020 taeraenator

021 #DittoSzn (smau + written 914 wc)

022 plan b

023 confession (on-hold) (smau + written 1.5k wc)

024 giselle's not single....?

025 😭cong😭ra😭tu😭la😭tions😭

026 #jinrina

027 a BOYFRIEND

028 nyc (not the city)

029 hitting on her

030 adopting yujin (fin!)

TAGLIST (CLOSED) : @sukirene @lluvjjun @jwielle @francinethings23 @alwayswook @222brainrot @planethyuka @xinxinyy @rikimylove @ilovewonyo @haohyo @euphoriashimkongz @ilovechanhee @wtfhyuck @xxpr3ttyk173rxx @wccycc @replayenthusiast @shotaroswifeyily @stryroses @cosmic-marauder @woncoree @haowonbins @avocarua @147file @i-yeseo @cyberpunksunwoo @chaerybae @wonyoungsvirus @minfolio @07yujin @imsodazed @marshwatz @v-sh

[serejae]

YOU WONDER WHY IM BITTER? | ZB1

WHAT? - you wonder why im bitter trend with zb1, if your confused search up “you wonder why im bitter” on tiktok :)

WHO ! - (a/n) very unfortunate day 4 me today

JIWOONG

you were the first person i imagined my life with

(you wonder why im bitter?)

ZHANGHAO

you were the person i broke my rules for

(you wonder why im bitter?)

HANBIN

you were the person i defended even when people said you were bad for me

(you wonder why im bitter?)

MATTHEW

you were the person i brought you back to meet my family

(you wonder why im bitter?)

TAERAE

you were the first person who i carved their initials into my guitar for

(you wonder im bitter?)

RICKY

you were the first person i let my guard down to

(you wonder why im bitter?)

GYUVIN

you were the first person to make me feel like a first choice

(you wonder why im bitter?)

GUNWOOK

you were the first person who i gave my jersey to wear at my soccer game

(you wonder why im bitter?)

YUJIN

(platonic)

you were the first person i opened up to

(you wonder why im bitter?)

[iwillneverforgiveyousunghanbin]

bully⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

friday, kim taerae— select choir

⋆˙⟡ zbully1 smut series masterlist! hanbin, jiwoong, hao, matthew, and taerae included. game day (group) chapter here. all 7 endings here.

⋆˙⟡ wc: 2.7k

⋆˙⟡ reader: just one gn!reader version for this (no pronouns are used at all to describe reader; reader is describe as having a "pretty" mouth but no gendered or femme language)

⋆˙⟡ series summary: five bullies. six days. it's gonna be a hell of a week, babe. stay hydrated.

⋆˙⟡ friday summary: it's the end of the most bizarre week of your life. last year, you would've been overjoyed to spend time in select choir with your friend kim taerae. but that all went down the drain after hanbin recruited him into his group of incessant jerks... and he's desperate to officially be one of the guys.

⋆˙⟡ warnings: explicit smut. 18+. minors do not interact. please read specific smut warnings under the cut! swearing. angst. slight dub-con. bullying. the lore for taerae is so SAD. i'll make sure his ending is happy, i promise. also we've got a ft. hanbin chapter but just in digital form.

⋆˙⟡ bully scale: ★★★★★ (5.0)

(idk the bully scale is subjective but like imagine your best friend saying this shit about you WHY IS HE DOING THAT OMG jk i know why and soon you will too)

EXPLICIT SMUT 18+ WARNINGS: oral, (taerae receiving), throat fucking (reader receiving), brief handjob and heavy petting (taerae receiving), cumming without warning in mouth, filming of sexual act, voyeur!hanbin, slight dubcon but like for both of them kind of idk you'll see but it's slight, bullying, the usual.

friday.

you should be elated that this week is nearly over. and you are. mostly, anyway. 

but there was an indescribable thrill to all this that you couldn’t seem to shake. all that talk of ravens yesterday had got you thinking...

 why did you dislike ravens in the first place?

thinking. crying. haphazardly finishing all of your assignments due friday that you’d procrastinated the whole week. urgent texts to and from mina after her ✨jiwoong oppa✨ stood her up for their date.

one thing was for certain: you desperately need sleep.

that’s why you’re currently falling asleep sitting up, hard-back music folder open in your hands as professor yoo works with the bass section. the lowest notes of “requiem” are soft and soothing and, for you at this sleep-deprived moment, very dangerous. 

luckily a sharp elbow to the shoulder jolts the drowsiness right out of you.

you look to your left to find kim taerae giving you one of the most judgmental glares you’ve ever earned in your life.

you would expect nothing less from him.

at one time a judgmental glare from taerae was the equivalent of a hug. you returned the gesture happily. and also threw in some hugs whenever he’d let you. he squirmed a bit, but the big smile that would grow on his face made it all worth it.

but there’s no warmth behind his eyes now. just a sharp elbow pointed at you, threatening to strike again if you didn’t shape up quick enough.

“you’re gonna get yourself in trouble,” he warns with a frown.

you roll your eyes. “why do you care?”

“because, unfortunately, some people still think we’re friends,” he says, making thin lines with his pencil on a page of his sheet music. “and i don’t want to suffer the social consequences of your embarrassing actions.”

“mm,” you agree wordlessly. “guess i should’ve thought of that myself.”

he doesn’t respond for a few moments, eyes focused on his sheet music until an audible sigh comes from his direction. “why are you so tired anyway? s’not like you.”

“for all you know, it could be,” you retort with a huff. “maybe i’m a real night owl now. maybe i’m out partying or smoking or... something.”

taerae snorts. “jiwoong hyung was not lying about those tragic acting skills.”

“oh, fuck off,” you reply.

his eyes widen. and then promptly squint with suspicion. “since when did you swear like that?”

you frown, trying to discern what he could mean. hadn’t you always been this uninhibited with your tongue? 

the answer was no. you hadn’t. and this new speech pattern of yours had a very specific origin: monday afternoon. you exhale a chuckle. maybe you had yet to realize the full extent of how this week has changed you.

and how your desire to change back continues to dwindle.

you just shrug, returning your focus to your music. you feel taerae’s eyes on you as you track your vocal section’s part in “requiem”.

you and taerae had purposefully chosen seats next to each other in choir last year so that you could goof off together during every possible free moment. it was also convenient for your parents, who always wanted to get pictures of you two together during concerts ever since high school.

now you wish you went to different universities altogether.

ironically, you might’ve had a better chance of remaining friends if you’d had distance. but you and taerae disagreed quite adamantly at the time.

halfway through your two-hour rehearsal, you’re allowed a fifteen minute break to grab water and stretch your legs. you always wander off down the empty storage hallway, where your favorite vending machine is hidden in plain sight— the one with the oreos and cheez-its and bugles in it. 

pulling out your debit card, you insert the chip into the machine and punch in the number for the snack of your choosing. you watch happily as it falls down from it’s spiral prison into the dispenser below. you start to bend down when a hand reaches in before you and grabs your snack.

“hey, what the—…” you trail off as you come face to face with a cavernous dimple. “give it back. now.”

“you’re so touchy today,” taerae condemns with a click of his tongue. he holds your snack high above his head, dangling it in a challenge. “seriously, what’s gotten into you this week?”

“oh, you know exactly what,” you huff, reaching for the snack in vain.

taerae laughs. “i guess a better question would be: what hasn’t gotten into you this week?”

“you’re so fucking funny,” you snap, fingers finally closing around the wrapper as you yank it down. 

taerae’s brow is raised in surprise, not really caring about the repossession of the snack. “seriously, i’m not used to you swearing like that. i’m not sure if i like it.”

“i assumed there was nothing you liked about me anymore,” you retort, tearing open your snack and shoveling the processed glory down your throat.

“that’s not true,” he replies, hand suddenly reaching to your face. he brushes his thumb across your bottom lip, a crumb transferring from you to him. he brings his thumb to his own lips and tastes it. “i still like your pretty mouth.”

when you finally manage to pick your jaw up off the ground, you shake your head. “i know you don’t think of me like that.”

“uh...” taerae mumbles awkwardly, glancing at the row of shelves behind you. “sure, i do.”

“oh yeah? how about mina’s pool party two years ago? when we—.”

“OH, actually you—,” he interjects urgently, glaring at you to shut up. normally you would. but after this week, you no longer feel bound to quiet compliance. “you don’t need to—.”

“—were playing spin the bottle and it landed on me and you threw up in the pool because you were so disgusted by the mere thought of kissing me—”

his lips crash onto yours, hand cupping your cheek. it’s a demanding, yet tentative kiss and you’re even more confused when it ends.

you take a step backward, folding your arms across your chest. 

“can you just—...” taerae grabs your arm and pulls you closer to him, glancing again at the row of shelves behind you. “yes, that’s perfect.”

“what’s perfect?” you ask with a frown, starting to grow immune to strange behavior after the week you’ve had.

“oh, um.... you,” taerae answers after a moment with a smirk. “you were always so perfect, (y/n). perfect grades. perfect manners. perfect body. i used to jump at the chance to sleep over when your mom would let me. you used to beg her until she finally said yes, because she knew you'd never misbehave. remember, honey?"

eyes wide at the dark shift in his tone, you nod slowly.

“you were so innocent... you slept shirtless, for fuck's sake. peacefully dreaming, while i pretended to be asleep on the floor,” he continues, brushing his thumb across your cheek. “hoping i wouldn't wake you up if i just lifted the covers to get a peek."

when you thought the worst of your pain this week was over…

“tae,” you breathe, eyes watering— pleading for this not to be true. it couldn’t be. at least... not in the vulgar way he was describing it. "you don't mean that."

at the sound of your despair, there's a momentary flash in his eyes. regret. you still know him like the back of your hand.

“why are you doing this?” you ask, hands flying to cup either side of his face. he flinches, trying his best not to look you in the eye again. trying not to let you see. “you don’t have to be my friend anymore if you really don’t want to. but i don’t know why you want to be like them when you’re miles better than they’ll ever—.”

“alright, that’s enough.”

the muffled, tinny voice comes out of nowhere. you look around your immediate surroundings, trying to discern where it came from.

“c’mon, you were doing so well,” the voice rings again. “you said you had this under control, bud. was i wrong to put my trust in you?”

“no, hyung,” taerae answers, shaking his head. “i—… i can do it.”

“hanbinnie?” you ask and then cough awkwardly to cover up the fact you just called your arch nemesis so affectionately. yesterday must’ve gotten to you more than you know. “i mean, hanbin-ah! what the actual hell is going on?”

“no need to worry about it, sweetheart,” hanbin’s voice dismisses again. taerae’s eyes dart towards the shelves behind you once more. you follow his gaze— jaw dropping when you see two camera lenses staring back at you. 

“what—...” you fumble, shaking your head in disbelief as you look at the back of taerae’s phone— propped up with a black music folder. “you’re recording this!?”

“afraid so,” hanbin answers for taerae. “i didn’t really think he could follow through without some supervision. don’t mind me though. unless you just can’t help yourself...”

while at the beginning of this week a situation as perverted and bizarre as this would’ve had your whole nervous system shutting down, you’re still standing tall. present in this strange moment. you smirk.

“aw, tae,” you coo mockingly, turning to your former friend. “how sentimental of you...”

a brow arches in confusion back at you. “what are you––?”

“of course you’d wanna capture such a special moment on camera,” you continue with a patronizing nod. “it’s not every day that you lose your virginity.”

“HEY THAT’S—…” taerae starts to yell at you for sharing this embarrassing personal detail that you’re sure he never disclosed to hanbin. “that’s… that’s not true.”

“oh come on, it’s nothing to be ashamed of,” you twist the metaphorical knife as hanbin stifles a laugh. “i’d be happy to help you out with that, since i was the one who had to listen to you whine for four years about how you were still. a. fucking—”

two fingers are down your throat in an instant. you gag, trying to step backwards, but taerae’s hand finds the back of your head— holding you in place. he removes his fingers slowly, pupils dilating when you whimper in fear.

“i’ve decided i don’t like the swearing,” he says, a sickening hint of sweetness in his tone. any upperhand you had is now gone as he traces your lips with his thumb. “such a pretty mouth. those filthy words shouldn’t be coming out of it.”

“y-you don’t get to decide that,” you stammer unconvincingly.

“so that’s what you really want, then?” he asks, sticking his thumb further into your mouth. you suck obediently. “you wanna have a filthy mouth?”

you nod, his thumb still pressed against your tongue— cheeks hollowed out as taerae bites his lip hungrily.

“then you can have it,” he says before removing his thumb from your mouth and pressing down on your neck and shoulder— forcing you to your knees in front of him. you guess joining the soccer team had really improved his strength. “just remember it’s what you said you wanted.”

taerae unbuttons his jeans, pulling the zipper down. he freezes, clearly unsure of what to do next. maybe this is your opportunity to wiggle your way out of this. if only your curiosity wasn’t equally as strong.

“we––... i have to audition after this,” you protest weakly. “when break’s over, i have to audition for the solo i’ve been prepping for so i want to keep my voice warm right now and—.”

“ah, that’s right. i did forget about that,” he affirms, looking up at the ceiling in thought before smirking back down at you. “but i think i can help keep it pretty warm, actually.”

your attempt to level with taerae only seems to encourage him as he pulls down his jeans and boxer-briefs. you inhale sharply as his hard cock comes to eye-level, so close you can really examine it. though it’s slightly smaller than hanbin’s, it’s thicker and you need to know immediately how it feels in your hand.

“whoah, you—,” taerae stumbles, eyes wide as you take him eagerly in your hand. he stares at you, lips parted as you start to pump him. “holy shit.”

“you’re sure you wanna do this?” you ask, pausing your motion to make eye contact with him. you can tell he doesn’t want you to stop, but there’s conflict lingering there that he just can’t seem to hide.

taerae clears his throat, shaking his head as he resumes his tough guy act. eyes cold once more, he shrugs. “a hole’s a hole.”

after a year of judgmental berating from your former best friend, it was almost comforting to know that he was capable of being even meaner than he already was. it meant that, for whatever reason, he usually didn’t want to be any meaner to you.

he takes both of your hands in one of his, keeping you from using them as his other hand finds the back of your neck again— guiding your face towards his cock. taerae doesn’t need to give much guidance though. you’re aching to get a taste and the way your lips sink down around him nearly knocks the wind out of him.

back pressed against the side of the vending machine, his thumb presses into your cheek— feeling himself inside of your pretty mouth. you swirl your tongue around his tip, causing him to moan softly.

there’s a little bit of rustling coming from where taerae’s phone is propped up on the shelf. you wonder if hanbin’s enjoying this. if he’s touching himself— wishing he was throat deep in you instead.

“c’mon, bud. is (y/n) running this show or are you?” hanbin asks, tone laden with frustration.

“i—... i am,” taerae asserts, grip tightening across the back of your neck. 

he starts to thrust gently into your mouth, an action that you’re not so familiar with. it rattles you a bit— loss of control after feeling like you were gaining it back.

“this is what you asked for, baby,” he reminds you, shallow thrusts starting to venture a bit deeper. “remember? you said you wanted a filthy mouth. so i’m gonna make a mess of it.”

you find the right rhythm to breathe through the thrusts. the tip of his cock is dangerously close to entering your throat, sending another wave of anxiety through you. but it’s not for long. 

your eyes meet taerae’s and, though he’s the one putting you in that danger, you suddenly feel very safe. you let out a sigh, the vibration causing him to mewl. he scratches at your neck affectionately, putting pressure against it to feel himself inside you as he fucks your throat.

“see, keeping that throat nice and warm,” taerae coos as his breathing gets heavier— and his moaning gets louder. “take me so well, i—.”

“shut the fuck up, dude,” hanbin scolds, his own breath growing labored. “do you wanna get caught before you can win the—?”

before hanbin can finish his thought, you feel a warm, sticky liquid begin to pour down your throat. you pull off of taerae, sputtering and coughing as you try to swallow it down. wiping your mouth, you look up at taerae who is looking at you like he wants to dive straight into the han river and never return.

“for fucks sake, are you actually a virgin or something?” hanbin asks angrily. “is that really all you can last for? and, jesus, you’ve gotta warn someone before you do that.”

your throat is starting to burn and you’d love to be able to say something, anything, but the rasp that comes out isn’t pleasant-feeling. you rub at your throat with your now-free hands as taerae’s expression just turns more horrified.

“did i... did i hurt you? fuck, i didn’t mean to—,” taerae starts to babble uselessly until hanbin claps loudly.

“good work, team!” he says as he finishes his round of applause. “mvp definitely goes to me, for coming up with this idea in the first place. i’ll see the campus activities secretary at the big game tomorrow, right?”

“mm,” is all you can croak out. you wish it sounded angrier.

“and i’ll see you at practice tonight, man. i—,” hanbin cuts himself off with a confused look. “wait, where did he go?”

you face forward, expecting to see taerae standing next to the vending machine but... hanbin’s right. he’s vanished.

“that kid’s a piece of work,” hanbin says, shaking his head. “you think he’d be more grateful after i took him under my wing and made him popular. i even got him a spot on the soccer team after a lot of private coaching. i mean, he’s benched for life, but still!”

you’re a saint among men, is what you wish you could say. instead, you just roll your eyes.

“just take his phone and give it back to him in class, will you?” hanbin asks as you stand up and make your way toward the shelves. “and drink some hot tea for that throat, okay? throw some honey in it and you’ll be good as new for tomorrow, i promise.”

you sigh. and you nod. and you pick up taerae’s phone and end the video call. 

and you go back to choir and sit in your black music chair and wait for taerae to come back, but he doesn’t. and when it’s time to audition for the solo you’ve been preparing for, you stay seated and quiet. 

seated and quiet.

like you’ve been for so long.

and when practice ends and the choir room is empty and you remain seated and quiet in your black music chair and tears begin to well up in your eyes, you don’t cry.

you smile.

you stand up.

you shout (briefly, so as not to disturb anyone in neighboring classrooms).

at some point or another, you forgot how to do these things. or you were made to feel like you couldn’t or shouldn’t. 

but that’s who you really are.

who you were always meant to be.

not a juliet. not a violin. not a goalie. not a bird. not a pretty mouth.

you.

you pick up your bag off the floor (and taerae’s) and throw them both over your shoulder, making a beeline toward the door.

absolutely, hanbinnie, you think. you’ll see me at the big game.

[withered-owll]

“Hurtful frustration pt. 1”

Sometimes siblings argue with each other 🤷‍♀️

BEHOLD THE ANGST!! My back is dead and my sanity is gone after the finals but I had this idea planned out in my drafts for a hot while so y’all shall suffer with me >:3

After Wukong and Macaque got imprisoned in the scroll by Azure Lion our two sweet little beans Yan Hao and Liling manage to escape but the atmosphere between them feels heavy.

Yan Hao obviously belongs to @lopsushi >:3

Eat up and see ya next time folks!

*skidaddles*

[astrae4]

MELTING POINT MASTERLIST

IN WHICH Emperor Zhanghao uses the imperial command to wed both you and Prince Shen. Normally, one would be happy to be wedded to a prince and become one of the most powerful ladies in the Empire. However, the young master of the Ducal house of Shen is said to be a cold and indifferent man. Oh! And did I mention that your duchy and his are enemies? Right! The cherry on top—I almost forgot that you have a weak body too haha… How will you survive the harsh Northern lands? Will you get along well with your husband? Will you be treated alright in an unfamiliar environment? Shall you just return back to the comfort of your home?

FEATURING Zerobaseone’s Ricky as the son of Duke Shen, Prince Shen Quanrui and you as the daughter of Duke Han, Princess Han Y/N.

GENRE romance, angst, fluff | historical fantasy, supposed enemies to lovers, forced marriage, northern duke au

WARNINGS non-gender neutral reader (reader will be using female pronouns/titles), forced marriage, infidelity, mild swearing, and miscommunication.

NOTE hi everyone! i’m so sorry for such a long wait, but thank you so much for you guys who did so regardless! this took so long to come out (initially it was supposed to go out during March) due to my health problems…but i’m happy to say that i’m fully recovered and finally going back on track with my writing plans! Thank you so much for your support, I hope you enjoy this series 💗

MORE WORKS — navigation | zb1!masterlist

CHAPTERS.

1 — the hunter and the prey.

It doesn’t really hit you that you’re getting married until your father comes in. The moment you see the tears in his eyes, you also feel your eyes water. You remember being young and dreaming of how you’d marry someone you love. You remember planning your dream wedding. This was it. This was what you had always imagined. Yet, all at the same time, it seemed so different.

2 — an unwelcomed bride.

3 — the past chases.

tba…

TAGLIST. @ja4hyvn @flwoie @sulkygyu @xiaoderrrr @ineedaherosavemeenow @lonewolfjinji @teddywonss @khaelscafe @autumn583 @lvieee @cyberstephzz @cara-rey @cuntserver8000 @yujinified @lowcalmarlboro @moncheriesu @carat-rose @fairyytyunn @taerae-verse @peachyy-moon @kaywhyessssss @cheederzchez @hueningcry @renjuneoo @totalnieparksunghoon @kuromixheartzzz @nerezza1234567891-blog @dilucpegg3r @ohsunnyboy @iraa567 @k-p0p-4ever @slimeclimbtime @paradise-world @sparkcling @fremineth @chickenscoups @kpopandbookschild (ask or comment to be added!)

NETWORKS. @k-labels @zumblrnet

© astrae4 2023 | please don’t copy, translate, or plagiarize my works on all platforms!

[cinnajun]

ᵕ̈ ೫˚∗: arguments with zb1

a/n: omg i posted before midnight this is a big win

notes: yujin is not included due to his age!

wc | 1.9k

jiwoong

the best way i can describe an argument with jiwoong is “mature”

you guys don’t argue often at all so when you do there’s usually a good reason for you to be arguing

perhaps it has to do with your living situation, or you’re not taking an issue jiwoong talked to you about as seriously as he wants you to be, or you feel like he’s spending too much time away from you

whatever it is, your argument will last max 3 days

day one is reserved for sulking, and you might end up staying the night at a friend’s house while jiwoong sits with hao and hanbin and tries to work through what he’s feeling

day two is for thinking—both of you think through things rationally and take mental notes on what you did wrong and what you think was on the other person

then, day three is for talking it out. you’ll decide on a place to meet that isn’t home, and you’ll work through everything while not getting upset or saying something unwarranted.

then, afterward, you’ll go home together and do something light and fun to cheer the both of you up

things go back to normal within four days, and you don’t think about the issue ever again

zhang hao

fights with hao are not fun

hot take but i think he’s the type of person to ghost you when you make him too upset

so whatever you’re fighting over, be it the dishes or something he said, once he gets angry enough he will just walk out and not talk to you for a while

depending on how upset he is it can be anywhere from less than a day to three or four days with no contact between the two of you

so yeah this is kind of a red flag but you don’t fight literally ever so it doesn’t happen enough for it to be a big issue

and his reasoning for ghosting you is that he doesn’t want to say something he doesn’t mean and/or can’t come back from

hao knows he’s the type of person to just say something wildly untrue when he’s mad and his worst fear is doing that to you

he returns from his mental retreat so apologetically, even if you end up thinking you were more in the wrong

will bring you an apology gift (usually it’s flowers or some sort of sweet treat) and always has some big long speech prepared

you also apologize if you feel it’s warranted (which is almost every time)

things will go back to normal in max two weeks

hanbin

fights with hanbin are big and emotional

like super emotional

this man is so in love with you that you being the source of any negative emotions is really hard for him to stomach

and it’s likely that, for the course of your entire relationship, you’ll fight maybe once or twice at most

so the fight you have is big and possibly the result of a lot of pent-up emotions that built up over a long period of time

you’re the one to walk out, and he’s full-blown sobbing by the time that happens

he feels miserable for the next couple of days

you two don’t ghost each other but it’s minimal contact and you can barely look at one another without crying lol

hanbin will probably end up staying elsewhere and you’ll stay home, drowning your sorrows in ice cream while you cry on the phone with your friends

when you’re both sound enough to work it out, you two just kinda cry apologies at each other

when the time comes for you to actually talk it out, it’s pretty easy and you’re left wondering what exactly the fight was over in the first place

hanbin will kiss every single part of you after the wound is patched up

and then he’s attached to you for the next couple of days lol

things go back to normal in maybe three-ish weeks? like that’s when he stops being super clingy and you go back to regularly scheduled programming

matthew

fights with matthew are small

he seems like the type of guy to be able to talk out big issues without it blowing out of proportion

so any larger problems the two of you are like … worked out via controlled and calm conversation

then you will have a blowout argument over you losing one of the sweatshirts you took without asking (your mom took it to the dry cleaners and didn’t tell you)

your arguments are petty and it’s a lot of really fake words thrown back and forth

so it’s not like one of you is being unnecessarily mean to the other, it’s from both of you

you don’t talk for a couple of days (also mutual) and then your mom’s dry cleaning shows up with the sweatshirt in tow

you send him a picture of it with some tear stains on it and he’s like … are you crying

then he’ll show up at your house not even thinking about the sweatshirt, just the fact that he doesn’t like it when you cry

will do anything to get you to stop crying

apologizes 18 times and puts on the tear-stained sweatshirt while going “wow, it’s so clean!” in hopes that you’ll at least laugh

after he fixes the crying situation you apologize too and suddenly it’s like it never happened

things go back to normal in a week

taerae

fights with taerae are quiet

tbh i just think his anger/sadness/any negative emotion is quiet

there’s no yelling, no crying, no insults, no nothing

the argument itself will be a bunch of isolated statements paired with scoffs, rubbing your tumbles, and feeling exasperated

neither of you leaves to cool off, and you just sit in different rooms after the fact

the next day might be a bit awkward and taerae will be somewhat cold towards you (and it would be a lie to say you don’t reciprocate the same exact energy)

but at some point during the day, while you’re sulking and laying down in bed, taerae will come in and lay down next to you

starts off by saying sorry and then you talk things out while just … laying there

he’s neither the type of person to take all the blame nor the type of person to shove all the blame onto you

like you could be entirely at fault but he will distribute responsibility equally between the two of you

he’s just the type of guy who really does not like arguing so he will do whatever he can to fix it quickly

after you’re done talking you’ll go on a long drive together

it’s aimless and quiet, but he holds your hand the whole time :)

things go back to normal within 3 days

ricky

i think fights with ricky are turbulent

you never really know the direction they’re going to go in you know

you don’t necessarily fight often but it’s not like you never fight, either

i think it’s a healthy amount of bickering

somewhat like an old couple LOL

if you have a big argument, though, it’s pretty much the least fun you’ve ever had in your whole entire life

ricky isn’t the type of guy to yell and cry but he’s the type of guy to give you a look that makes you feel like crying

i also think he’d struggle to take everything you’re saying seriously so he might laugh in exasperation from time to time

which obviously makes you angrier

i think if you end up crying, though, ricky will have like a crazy moment of clarity where he’s like … oh shit

cue some crazy introspection

you’ll run off somewhere else in the house and he’ll just sit on the couch and think

he’s practically taking notes on the entire thing, and studying what he thinks was the most out-of-pocket for him to say and what he needs to apologize for

after he’s gathered his thoughts he’ll seek you out and ask if you’re okay sitting down and talking with him

and he will wait however long he needs to if you say no

he essentially says everything he feels necessary, ends it off with an apology and kisses your hand

then it’s over

things go back to normal within the day

gyuvin

you bicker with gyuvin a lot and 99.9% of the time it’s silly and super unserious

that’s the type of couple you are yk

so your fights are born out of your little, unserious arguments actually going a little bit too far, and they last soooo long

and most of it happens in front of your friends which isn’t nice either

it starts out very small, with little jabs at one another

keeps amping up for the rest of the night, and once you both leave whatever hangout you were at, all your friends are like … they’re gonna fight guys get ready

they’re right

you argue the entire way home and when he drops you off he doesn’t even give you a good night kiss, which makes things even worse

you continue arguing over text and into the next few days all while acting like everything is fine

meanwhile, you’re texting your friends (separately) like can you believe that he just said that? can you believe he’s pulling this shit?

finally they lock you two in a room and tell you to figure it out because your arguing is annoying

you will painstakingly be like “okay maybe i went too far” and he essentially does the exact same thing

and then he apologizes for not giving you a good night kiss that one time and everything is fine

things go back to normal in like 2 weeks but just keep in mind for the entire 2 weeks you were just being passive-aggressive with each other

gunwook

arguments with gunwook are born out of stress and aren’t really arguments

he’s a busy guy who’s doing a lot of things and sometimes he bites off more than he can chew

which isn’t nice because he refuses to be like “hey i might have to lay off boyfriend duties for a couple of days so i can work through all these commitments i made without thinking” because he thinks he’ll be a bad boyfriend because of it

essentially you’re not even aware he’s getting upset with you until the stress bubbles over one day

he accidentally tells you to leave him alone and let him work which makes you sad :(

but you do because you pretty much understand that he’s overwhelmed

but you’re still upset so you don’t just forgive him and move on because … idk … if he talked to you it wouldn’t have happened in the first place

is this petty … kind of yes but if you want things to change you need to put your foot down!!!

so you spend the next two or three days missing your boyfriend a miserable amount before he texts you saying “can we talk”

of course you can

you practically sprint to his house

and you talk!! and he apologizes for being mean to you while promising it won’t happen again

and gunwook learns from his actions so it really doesn’t happen again

things go back to normal in 3-4 days

thank you for reading !

tags: @happysmileybee @wtfhyuck

[aectpen]

3 of Us - poly!haobin x reader

m.list

pairing: haobin x reader

genre: angst with happy ending

synopsis: hanbin and hao have a fight that leaves you in the middle

words: .9k

You stared up at the ceiling. Sandwiched between Hanbin and Hao, unable to toss and turn, you found yourself incapable of even catching a wink of rest. Their backs were turned away, oblivious to your restless night.

Earlier that evening, Hanbin and Hao engaged in a heated argument sparked by Hao's perceived "flirting" with an old friend at the market. Hanbin's reaction stemmed from his deep affection for you; he became upset with Hao for appearing excessively friendly towards the girl in your presence. It's true that you experienced a twinge of jealousy, with a tightness in your chest as you observed the way Hao tilted his head and smiled at her—the same way he usually did with you.

Despite all of that, you hesitated to bring it up. After all, he isn’t in contact with her, so why harbor any resentment? However, even though you mentally decided to let it go, your feelings manifested in your expressions and actions. Throughout the rest of the day, a subtle pout lingered on your face, and when Hao inquired about something, your responses were brief. Hanbin took note of all of this, but didn’t want to make a scene.

The moment the three of you reached home, Hanbin immediately pounced on the opportunity to call him out.

“So you’re just gonna act oblivious?” Hanbin raised his voice. Hao only laughed, thinking Hanbin was joking. “That girl. You were so obvious!”

You stayed silent, not wanting to start a fight, nor participate in one.

“She was just a friend that I hadn’t seen in a while.” Hao explained, raising his hands.

“The way you were acting. It was just disrespectful. Do you not notice when y/n is upset about stuff like this?” Tears welled in your eyes. You dreaded sparking a conflict between them, silently praying that Hanbin wouldn't address the underlying reason for your uncharacteristic behavior, devoid of your usual affectionate demeanor.

“Why do you always have to speak for her? Do you enjoy causing problems?” That's when it escalated beyond its initial scope. When you resort to a personal jab, you lose sight of the main issue and attempt to deliver an even more hurtful blow.

The remark ignited a shouting match between the two, spiraling into a confrontation where the original cause of their disagreement became unclear. Anger clouded their judgment, rendering the argument directionless. Despite your plea for them to stop, they remained deaf to reason. Their conflicts were infrequent, only arising from trivial matters.

You just wanted it to end. Even if Hao’s actions hurt your feelings, you knew he didn’t have malicious intent. He was just a friendly person. You also know Hanbin only came at him because of his love for you.  He couldn’t stand to see you upset without an apology.

The remainder of the night unfolded in silence. Not a word was spoken. Tension hung thick in the air, palpable enough to be sliced with a knife. The anger was so intense that neither of them could bring themselves to talk to you. Each person carried out their nightly routine in solitude.

None of you were angry enough to sleep separately. You thought about it, but neither of them raised the idea. Hanbin went to sleep first, followed by you, then Hao. They slept on their sides, both facing away from you.

Sleep eluded you as you dwelled on the unfolding events. You beat yourself up for allowing them to sleep harboring anger. You played out alternate scenarios in your mind, envisioning a timeline where you intervened promptly, and everyone went to sleep in a comforting embrace. Yet, even in that hypothetical situation, you couldn't escape the possibility of making Hanbin feel guilty for defending you.

You tuned into the gentle rhythm of their breathing, observing the subtle rise and fall of their shoulders. Thoughts of the morning ahead invaded your mind, anticipating the impending silence. The last thing you wished for was them waking up with furrowed brows and lingering pouts.

The echo of their hurtful words played on a loop in your mind. You couldn't shake off the realization that your own jealousy had fueled the current situation. A quiet sniffle escaped you as tears traced a path down the side of your face, dampening your pillow. 

The supposedly hushed sniffles didn't escape Hanbin's notice. He shifted to face you. "Trouble sleeping?"

Turning toward him, he glimpsed your slightly puffy eyes and pursed lips, prompting him to tenderly touch your cheek. "Is this about us? God, I'm so sorry, y/n."

"No need to apologize. It's my fault it happened in the first place," you self-criticized.

"It's not," he insisted, shaking his head vigorously. "Things got out of hand. At this point, it's nobody's fault."

“I just want it to be over. I don’t want anyone to be mad.” You held on to his hand.

Both of you directed your attention to Hao, who was now propped up on both elbows.

“I’m sorry. I was being dismissive and mean.” He leaned towards you.

“I’m sorry for not listening to you and being mean too.” Hanbin returned the apology.

“Now kith,” you said, earning a laugh from the both of them.

Hanbin positioned himself between the two of you, encircling his arms around you both, drawing you closer. You and Hao intertwine your hands over Hao’s chest, blowing air kisses at each other. The three of you drifted off to sleep, accompanied by a harmonious chorus of soft snores, just as it was meant to be.

[foreverbase1]

Teardrop ❣ ZEROBASEONE

❥𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: popular!bullies!ZEROBASEONE x bullied!fem!reader (not really tho)

❥𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 5.0k

❥𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: High School AU, slight Fluff, mainly Angst, Reader comes back as a bad bitch tho

❥𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Bullying, name calling (slut, whore, etc), members are complete assholes, Reader calls them names back (doggy, etc), swearing, physical bullying (hair pulling, tripping, kicking the back of Reader's knees lightly), mentions of blood

❥𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐠: Teardrop by Alex Porat

❥𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: bullies!ZB1, IVE's Leeseo & ILLIT's Minju

❥𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Reader is consistently the target of bullying by ZEROBASEONE, a group of very popular boys of her school who typically get away with anything they do to her.

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝, 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬! <𝟑

Decided to try smth a little bit different, so the lyrics aren't really the focus here!

"𝙏𝙝𝙧𝙚𝙬 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙞𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙛𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙣, 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙞𝙩𝙮 𝙤𝙛 𝙢𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙨"

You sat at the front of your class, writing away into your notebook as the teacher continued the lecture. You had a determined and focused look in your eye, but a tiny smirk was placed onto your lips that were coated in a shiny pink lipgloss.

You could feel the eyes of 9 people staring at the back of your head, but they weren't hurtful or mean gazes, they were more obedient? Concerned? Maybe a little scared? Either way, you liked it. Now don't get it twisted, you aren't a nasty person in any way, every other student could agree on that, you were one of the most helpful and kind students in the entire school.

After the bell had signalled the end of the class and the teacher had packed their things up and left. You heard footsteps approach your desk as you were putting away your school supplies, your eyes looked up slowly, staring at the 9 boys that stood in front of your desk. They were the popular boys of your school. Emphasis on 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦. Who were they? They were ZEROBASEONE, a popular self-formed group of friends at your school, consisting of 9 boys; Kim Jiwoong, Zhang Hao, Sung Hanbin, Seok Matthew, Kim Taerae, Shen Quanrui, Kim Gyuvin, Park Gunwook and Han Yujin.

They were popular simply due to the fact every student at your school had a crush on them, mainly cause of their looks and talent, and also wealth. These 9 boys were rich and originally had the school backing them, they would perform at every dance tournament your school held and at school festivals, they were the school's pride.

Now? Now they simply obeyed you, cause you were the first of their victims to stand up against them, fight back and bite them where it hurt. And also cause you had very damning evidence that could ruin each of their futures in the music industry.

"Y/N...." Hanbin was the first of his friends to speak up, your eyes looking at him and a small smile graced your lips. "Hm?" You hummed, but before any more words could escape from his lips, two more figures joined you. It was your best friends, Minju and Leeseo.

"Y/N, hurry! The cafeteria is gonna run out of strawberry milk if we don't get going" Minju pulled on your arm. "Sure, let's get going" You smile up at them, sending a knowing smirk towards the 9 boys in front of you. Exiting the classroom with your two best friends, all 3 of you giggled to yourselves.

Now you might be very confused. So, let me explain, and get prepared, cause this is a long one!

"𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙢𝙮 𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙝𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢, 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙚, 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙚"

Originally, your dynamic was never like this. It was the exact opposite. You used to be the least popular student in the entire school, mainly cause of ZB1's influence on the school and its students. Everyone turned a blind eye when they would call you names, teased you until you cried, hide your supplies so you'd have to run around the entire school building looking for it and they never once dared to rat them out to the faculty. But neither could you, at least, at that time.

The only two people by your side were Leeseo and Minju, they were the only reason you didn't just transfer schools and move on with your life, they were also the reason your entire dynamic changed and they were also the only two that didn't give a flying fuck about ZB1's influence. But they also listened to you, choosing to not turn to the school faculty about the bullying, even if it pained them to see you go through it.

But let's start at the beginning; Elementary school. You used to be best friends with Kim Taerae, the two of you being extremely close. This was up until high school, where you met Leeseo and Minju, and where Taerae met the other ZB1 members. You two drifted apart and lost contact, but at least you still had Minju and Leeseo.

And then everything changed when you and the rest of ZB1 had been put into the same class, thankfully Minju and Leeseo were in it too, so you weren't completely alone. But this was where the bullying began. It was all for a dumb reason too.

By this point, ZB1 had become popular throughout your entire school. You couldn't deny, you were also a fan of them at first. But when Gunwook came up to your desk one day and asked you out on a date, you couldn't help but feel a little self conscious. After all, you could hear his friends snickers in the back of the class and with the smile he wore on his face and his status in the school, the first thought you got was that this was all a joke. A dumb prank to toy with your feelings.

"Sorry Gunwook, i don't think i can" You smiled apologetically at him, you tried to let him down easy, but when the snickers from his friends abruptly stopped and his smile had disappeared and been replaced with a glare within his eyes, you couldn't help but feel your heart drop into your stomach, he shrugged. "Whatever, it's not like you're all that anyway" He said, walking away towards his friends and leaving you stunned. From that day on it got worse.

Gyuvin, Gunwook and Yujin were the main ones from the group that teased you. They shared most of your classes and would tease you whenever they could; At your desk, at your locker, even doing it while the lecture is on going. And it would always resort with you getting into trouble.

You sat in your English class, unfortunately for you, your seat was right in front of Gyuvin, Gunwook and Yujin's seats. Allowing easy access to you. "Pst, Y/N!" Gyuvin whispered, getting light shoves and giggles from Gunwook and Yujin. "Where'd you get your hairband from? It looks cheap" He said, causing you to reach your hand up and fix your hairband. It didn't hurt much, he always targeted your accessories.

Gunwook was the next one to take his approach. "Y/N?" He whispered your name, you hated the fact that your ears tuned in whenever they talked, knowing it'd just result in you being hurt. "I heard you write notes about Hanbin in your notebook, is that true?" He smirked, and with a little maneuvering of his body, he'd peek at the front of you face. "She's blushing, it's true!" He giggled between Gyuvin and Yujin.

You weren't actually blushing because of what he said, it was mainly out of embarrassment. Because the students seated around you were giving you odd looks, as they had overheard what they were saying. You just wanted to melt away, right then and there. But it all got worse when it was finally Yujin's turn. "Y/N" He said, leaning over his desk a bit.

"I heard you still have to sleep with a night light, is it true?" He giggled, it was nothing more than immature, elementary school level teasing. But the glare you sent him was enough of a reaction to feed into them. "She totally does" Gunwook snickered, causing you to turn around. "Can you shut up?" You bit back, but unlike them, you weren't so lucky. "Miss L/N, wanna repeat what you just said?" The teacher said, overhearing what you had said.

Now everyone's eyes were on you and the three boys had gotten what they wanted. You blushed out of embarrassment, fidgeting in your chair. "No, sorry sir" You said, staring directly down, and with a scoff from your teacher, the lesson resumed. Your eyes filled with tears that threatened to fall, you didn't like this, but you had to deal with it. Once class was over, you collected your things and bolted out the door, hoping to find refuge in Minju and Leeseo.

"What assholes" Minju glared at the boys of ZB1 from across the cafeteria. "It's been like this for the past 3 months since you rejected Gunwook, why don't we just go to the principal?" Leeseo said, thinking rationally. She rubbed your back as you ate the small sandwich in your hand. You shook your head in response to her words. "It wouldn't matter, the school adores them, including the principal. They would just dismiss it and if they find out i reported them, it'll get worse" You sniffled, voice quiet.

The bell would soon ring, signalling it was time for your Math class. Probably your most dreaded class of all. Not because you sucked at Maths, it was because Zhang Hao and Shen Quanrui had that class with you. And they were by far the worst of your bullies. Unlike Gyuvin, Gunwook and Yujin with their teasing and tint jabs at you, Zhang Hao and Quanrui threw actual insults at you. They'd call you any name they could think of; Slut, Whore, Dumbass, Loser. You name it, they'd say it.

Sighing, you got up and hugged your friends goodbye. Walking out of the cafeteria with Zhang Hao and Shen Quanrui close behind you.

In your Maths class, you once again had the misfortune of having your desk be placed right in front of Zhang Hao and Quanrui's seats. Once again, allowing easy access to you. As the teacher taught the class about different equations and whatever else she needed to teach the class that day.

And this was when Zhang Hao and Shen Quanrui would start their typical antics. "Hey Y/N?" Quanrui whispered, Zhang Hao snickering beside him already. You tried to drown him out, trying to ignore him, but you also knew that'd make it worse. "Hey, slut" He said again, this time dropping his teasing tone. You breathed in, before slowly turning around. "What's the answer to this one?" He held up his notebook, pointing to one of the equations written down that he couldn't be bothered to figure out himself. "I don't know" You mumbled, and Zhang Hao scoffed. "What are you? A fucking moron?" Him and Quanrui snickering to themselves, the teacher looked over at the noise and instead of targeting the two boys who were clearly making the most noise, her eyes landed on you and your figure being turned towards them.

"Miss L/N, can you answer this one for us?" She raised her voice, causing you to turn around and face the front of the class. You looked around quickly, everyone's eyes once again on you. "Umm, is it....96?" You said, your voice was quiet. The teacher sighed, shaking her head and the class giggled. "Pay attention next time" She scolded you and you nodded, sniffling a little as tears filled your eyes again. "Great job dumbass" Hao said, him and Quanrui snickering to themselves.

Just as quickly as class started, it ended as well. And now it was time for your final class of the day, History class. With Hanbin, Jiwoong, Matthew and Taerae. This was by far your worst class of them all, cause while Gyuvin, Gunwook and Yujin teased you, Zhang Hao and Quanrui called you the meanest insults they could think of. Hanbin, Jiwoong and Matthew were much worse and would resort to physical contact with you.

Thankfully, Leeseo shared this class with you and your seat was with hers. But again, Matthew, Hanbin and Jiwoong's seats were right behind yours. And during this class, was when you finally had enough and reached your breaking point.

"See Y/N, this is where....." Leeseo's voice carried on as you listened to her help you with a certain part you were stuck on, you giggled. "Thanks SeoSeo" you thanked her, earning a smile from your best friend. As class continued, it was actually peaceful, so far the last 4 members of Zerobullyone hadn't bothered you yet. Keyword being yet.

The teacher would leave the class, another faculty member requesting their aid in something. And this was when it all went downhill. You got up to collect some paper from the back of the class, and with a few shared glances between the boys, Matthew got up and followed you.

While you were minding your business, humming to yourself as you picked up a few pieces of paper, Matthew stepped behind you, pulling your hair. Hard. You hissed, your hand quickly reaching behind you to rub over the spot he had just pulled on. "Sorry, my hand got caught" He smirked, giving you a side eye as he got some paper and returned to his seat, earning high fives from Jiwoong and Hanbin.

You breathed in, calming yourself. But next up to make your life a living hell was Hanbin. As you went to turn around and return to your seat, Hanbin walked right behind you, and raising his leg quickly, he kicked the back of your knee. Causing you to buckle and bang your knees against the wall in front of you. You bit your lip to stop yourself from letting out a cry of pain, standing up and wobbling back over to your desk without a second glance back at Hanbin.

But unfortunately for you, you still had one more demon to face. Kim Jiwoong. As you neared your desk, he stuck his leg out, causing you to trip and let out a loud yelp, followed by a loud crash. "Y/N, you okay?!" Leeseo yelled, but before she could get up the teacher walked back in. All eyes we're once again on you. "Y/N, what are you doing on the floor?" The teacher asked, watching as you sat up, letting out a small whimper before reaching up to your head.

Your fingers grazed a spot on your forehead where your head had hit the desk, and with a gasp from a student, everyone's eyes widened. "She's bleeding!" One student shouted, at their words you had pulled your hand back down in front of you, analyzing the crimson red that stained your fingers. "Y/N, are you okay?" The teacher kneeled down and helped you up, you began letting the tears fall, sobbing as you shook your head. "Miss, I'll take her to the nurse" Taerae stood up, a smile on his face.

Leeseo glared at him, her eyes turning to Matthew, Hanbin and Jiwoong behind as the three of them tried holding in their laughter. "Great idea, Taerae. Tha-" "Actually, I'll take her" She cut off the teacher, standing up and earning glares from the 4 boys, she continued. "I finished all my work and i'm sure it'd be better if someone who actually 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘥 went with her. I'm her friend after all and i'm sure Taerae hasn't finished all his work." She finished, a smirk on her face as she stared at Taerae.

"Well, okay. Thank you Leeseo." The teacher said, handing you off into the comfort of your best friend's arms as you left the class. "Crybaby" Taerae muttered to you as you both left. You didn't know why you had to go through his, all because you rejected their friend? It wasn't your fault, you thought it was them trying to mess with you.

"Thank you" You sniffled, thanking the nurse as she patched up your head and called your parents. "SeoSeo, i think i'm gonna move schools" Her eyes widened, and the girl shook her head. "You can't be serious, if you do that, they'll know they won". You looked down, twiddling your fingers. " I know, but, it hurts and i can't take too much more, SeoSeo." She sighs, when you got like this she knew there wasn't much she could do to change your mind.

Leeseo waited with you until your parents arrived and picked you up, before returning to class. Entering back into the classroom, she felt the glares of the 4 boys return to her. The teacher nowhere to be seen. "Just had to get in the way" Hanbin mumbled, and this was when Leeseo snapped. "What are you four, mentally deranged or something? Did your parents drop you when you were kids? You caused Y/N's head to bleed and that's all you have to say? All cause of what, cause she rejected your fragile friend and hurt his fucking feelings? Grow the fuck up." She growled at them, malice in her tone as she collected her things and left once the bell had signalled the end of the school day.

"𝙊𝙣𝙚 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙄'𝙢 𝙜𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙖𝙠. 𝙊𝙣𝙚 𝙙𝙞𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙤𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙚𝙠, 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙖𝙡𝙡, 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙥𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝"

A month had passed since the incident that day and you had refused to go to school, you only let your parents know half of what was going on and it was all they needed to let you stay at home. After school finished, Leeseo and Minju would visit you and help you catch up on all the lessons you missed. Without them, you didn't know how long you could've handled the bullying when it first started.

Two weeks before summer break arrived, Leeseo and Minju had managed to convince you not to go through with the school transfer, instead offering another solution; 𝙍𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙜𝙚.

At first you were a bit cautious, cause you could go into big trouble and the 9 of the ZB1 members were basically untouchable. Well, not entirely. "Since you haven't been at school, they've chosen new targets each time. If me and Leeseo record every incident, they can't turn it down whatsoever." Minju sat up, showing you both two small special cameras and microphones.

"I'm.....not gonna ask where you got those from" Leeseo giggled, as she fixed your hair for you. "What do you say Y/N? I'm down for it if you are" She said, looking at you. Your eyes looked between your two friends and then back at yourself in the mirror. You didn't really want to get on their level, but when there's no one else to turn to, then you have to bite back. Right?. "Let's do it"

And just like that, your mission to ruin ZEROBASEONE's members was initiated. Just as Minju and Leeseo had said, they recorded each incident of the members bullying other students and would then send the recordings to you, where you'd then edit it together into one large video file. This would continue on until summer break rolled around, and you were sure you had everything you needed.

With the video created and ready for whenever you needed it, you decided to move onto the secret phase of your mission. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧. So all of summer break you learned how to do makeup, doll yourself up. You weren't ugly by any means, and this wasn't like a Disney movie where taking your glasses off suddenly made you prettier, but your school's popularity thrived off of visuals. And if it's visuals they wanted, you'd give it to them.

Just as quickly as summer break started, it had ended. On the day of the student's return, you texted Leeseo and Minju to meet you in class and not pick you up, as you had a surprise. They agreed, trusting you. And now here you stood, in front of the school gates, earning glances and whispers from other students around you.

You walked through the halls of the school, greeting each student and teacher that passed. Your hair was nice and neat, curled well. A hairband sat prettily atop your head, your lips shining with pink lipgloss, your cheeks holding a bit of blush and a smile gracing your lips. It was like they were seeing a whole new person, and technically they were.

Standing outside your classroom door, you texted Leeseo and Minju one last time, before opening the classroom door and stepping inside, the sound of the heeled shoes you had purchased during summer clicking against the floor as you stepped inside and shut the door behind you. Everyone was quiet, all eyes on you. Including the ZB1 members. Leeseo and Minju's mouths were open in shock, but a tiny hint of a smirk was hidden within it too.

"Good morning" You said, eyes scanning the classroom. A chorus of slow and quiet good mornings were given back, everyone beginning to whisper amongst each other. This was going all according to plan, just like you hoped. Instead of taking the route to your desk in order to avoid the ZB1 members, you took the route where you had to pass by them instead.

As you walked past, the members quickly sprung into action, with Hanbin pulling on your bag and causing it to drop some of your school supplies. You stood still, everyone's eyes now on you. But you weren't scared, no, quite the opposite. As the members tried to snicker to one another, you turned towards Hanbin and stepped closer. "Pick it up" You said, causing everyone to gasp. "W-what?" Hanbin said back, staring down at you.

You scoffed, grabbing his tie and yanking him down a bit to your eye level, everyone's eyes widened in shock including Hanbin and the rest of the ZB1 members. "I said, Pick. It. Up. Doggy." Each word that left your mouth was laced with venom, and Hanbin swallowed hard. Looking around, he quickly bent down and began picking up your supplies and handing it back to you. "Thank you" You smiled at him.

And now, you may be confused. We went through what each member did to bully you and get to you right? All except Taerae. That was cause Taerae never resorted to teasing, physical bullying or calling you the lowest of insults. Instead he held something much harmful; Your secrets from your now broken friendship.

Determined to make up for the embarrassment you caused Hanbin, Taerae chuckled. "Y/N, remember when you used to have a massive crush on me?" He said, now this was getting juicy, at least for the onlookers. Stopping in your tracks again, you turned towards Taerae and his friends. "Taerae, remember when you peed yourself in the middle of class? Cause i sure do" You bit back, and that caused a chorus of laughter to erupt in the classroom, Taerae shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

Finally reaching your friends, you greeted them with hugs and a smile. But you weren't done, not until you got back at each member.

Your next targets were Gyuvin, Gunwook and Yujin. But they were easy, after all, it wasn't hard getting them to shut up. Your first class of the day was Sports class and luckily for you, the teacher that usually taught the Male students was absent, so both groups would merge this one time.

The teacher decided to play dodgeball, thinking it'd be fun to see how it'd go. Of course, the girls were losing badly. Because most of the time, your group did everything but the actual class during Sports class. But you were determined to use this class to get back at Gyuvin, Gunwook and Yujin. And that you would.

When the teacher was distracted, you used this opportunity to exact your revenge. You threw the ball as hard as possible, hitting Gyuvin right in the genitals and causing him to collapse to the floor in pain. "What happened?" The teacher said after her attention was put back on the class at the sound of the commotion, everyone was silent staring at you.

"Sorry, i accidentally threw the ball a little too hard." You giggled, approaching Gyuvin and offering your hand. He hesitated, but took it anyway. "Don't leave yourself so open next time, duckling" You whispered to him, before returning to your side of the field with a smirk on your face.

Gyuvin had to sit out due to the pain he was feeling and this left two people left to take care of. Gunwook and Yujin. You nodded towards Leeseo, who on cue, began distracting the teacher. "Hey, miss, i was thinking...." She began the distraction as you targeted your next bully; Yujin. Picking up the ball, when Yujin was distracted with dodging two other students attempts at eliminating him, you threw the ball at him, once again with all your strength, hitting him right in the stomach and toppling him over.

The teacher paused, blowing the whistle and signalling that Yujin was out. "Sorry, i guess i don't know my own strength." You giggled as you watched Yujin glare at you, leaving the field. One more to go.

With the last signal to Minju, the girl would start her distraction on the teacher. "Hey, i think i heard......" You drowned out her voice and focused on Gunwook, you two stared at each other, you knew that he had caught onto what you were doing. He wasn't stupid after all, but the poor boy had no idea what you had coming for him.

When you managed to tag Leeseo back into the game, she threw a ball right at Gunwook, who spent his time dodging it. This allowed you to set yourself up, and before the boy could recover, you hurled the ball right at his face. Hard. Gasps erupted the entire sports hall, and the teacher had to stop the class in order to attend to the whimpering boy on the floor holding his nose.

"Gunwook, are you okay?" You said, faking innocence and pretending to actually care. The boy glared up at you, and just as you were enjoying the payback you were giving them, the class ended. But that isn't where it stops, you still had 4 boys left to get revenge on.

Your next targets were Zhang Hao and Shen Quanrui. Math class would be fun this time around. The lesson went normally for the first part, you just waited for the two boys to try and get their egos fulfilled by targeting you. "Y/N" Zhang Hao's voice filled your ears, now the fun part.

Turning towards Zhang Hao, you smiled at him. "What is it?" You said, catching him off guard a bit. But he recovered quickly, holding up his notebook. "What's the answer to this one?" He pointed to the question, you looked at it before looking back at him.

"Why? Can't figure it out yourself? Don't tell me...." You covered your mouth to stop yourself from laughing too loud. "Zhang Hao's actually an idiot" You said loudly, of course, on purpose. The teacher cleared her throat, catching your attention. "Miss, i think Zhang Hao needs help, he can't even figure out what 5 + 5 is. He's asking me for the answer" You explained to her, causing Hao to glare at you from where he sat, giggles filled the classroom as the teacher nodded her head.

"I see, Zhang Hao, i'm quite shocked cause you're usually at the top of this class." She said, and while they were distracted by the teacher, you quickly exchanged yours and Quanrui's notebooks before you spoke up again. "And miss, i think Quanrui is confused too, cause he doodled on his notebook". Quanrui looked down at his (yours) notebook, and just like you had said, the entire pages were filled with doodles.

"I'm disappointed with you two, pay attention, cause i'm only going over it once" The teacher took her place at the front of the class, determined to help Zhang Hao and Quanrui despite them not actually needing help. "Better luck next time, morons" You snickered, facing the front of the class with a smirk as you felt them stare at the back of your head.

Now it was time for your last two targets; Kim Jiwoong and Seok Matthew. But, you weren't gonna humiliate them in front of everyone else, instead you'll let them fear that you would. What better way to break the two cockiest members egos? Make them live in paranoia.

"SeoSeo, Ju, i need you to do something for me" You told the two girls as you sat in the cafeteria. It was time for the final phase of your plan. You were going to ruin ZEROBASEONE.

After lunchtime had finished, you waited in an empty classroom until Leeseo and Minju arrived. When the doors slammed open and the two girls ran in with a group of 9 boys behind them, you knew it was time. Clicking play on the laptop you had set up, the video you had put together played on the monitor. It showcased each bullying event that each member did to a poor student, making sure to blur out the students faces for their privacy.

"Checkmate" You said, smirking as you stared at the stunned expressions on each member's face. After the video ended, you, Leeseo and Minju listened contently to each member beg you not to release the video. It was cute, in a way. You had them wrapped around your finger and begging at your feet. You had ruined them in a day, how easy was that. The 9 men that made your life hell for days on end, cracked in one day.

"Okay, we won't. Under one condition." You said, stepping forward with your arms crossed over your chest. Eyes all on you. "Do as we say." You spoke each word slowly, making sure they heard you.

And that is how we come to the present day. Your revenge worked perfectly, you made all 9 members crack in the span of a day and held a video that could ruin their careers if they so much as tried to step out of line. You smiled to yourself as you stared at yourself in the school bathroom mirror. It was cruel, and sure, you felt bad about it. You had stooped to their level, but as you looked at yourself, you couldn't help but feel content.

You had gotten revenge on the 9 boys that caused you so much pain and hurt, the 9 boys that made you want to run away and hide from the world, the 9 boys who hurt the fragile girl that was still deep inside you. But you avenged her, you protected her. You protected 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧. And now you no longer had to worry or live in fear of them anymore.

𝘊𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘦

"𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙨 𝙢𝙮 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙙𝙧𝙤𝙥 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪."

𝐈 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝 <𝟑 𝐈 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐈'𝐦 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝!

[haesunflower]

soulmates unfortunately series [the prologue]

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genre: romance/fluff with adult themes pairings: reader x park gunwook, reader x kim taerae, reader x seok matthew, reader x shen ricky. word count: 3.2k warnings: drinking, character death, nsfw mention (no actual smut), underage puppy love, and other adult themes. rating is 16+.

ABOUT. here's the thing about soulmates, once you meet the one that is meant for you, you start to age. the biological clock starts to tick, and you are no longer a fresh faced 20 year old. years go by, and next thing you know it, you've grown old and wrinkly – right next to the love of your life. y/n hated this concept.

y/n has had many soulmates in her lifetime. chapter zero explores the soulmates that came before she stopped believing in the concept entirely.

⋆୨♡୧ series masterlist/about the series. ⋆୨♡୧

You used to believe in the concept of soulmates. 

It could be a beautiful thing, really. In theory, you build your entire future with this person, remaining young until you meet the one that is meant for you. In this world, your biological clock remains frozen – physical and mental aging included.

Life doesn’t start unless you have your other half along with you. Your soulmate. 

Growing up, you hear and experience multiple love stories around you. You are taught to look forward to this life changing moment, watching out for the tell-tale signs of your other half. Your chest tightens around them, pulling you closer, drawing you in. Others say it’s as if the universe is physically trying to draw you closer together. But you liken it more to a ‘gut feeling’; There’s no other way to describe it, you just know. 

That’s how you felt about Park Gunwook – the first boy you ever came to love. The first soulmate. 

PARK GUNWOOK. TWELVE YEARS OLD. YEAR 1920.

Gunwook lived in the same farm town as you, and everyone knew him. 

He was the favorite son in his family. He wasn’t the eldest – but he was reliable even from a very young age. He ran errands for the neighbors often and was kind to all the children and elderly. If anyone needed some help with carrying hay bale, starting a fire, or cleaning out the barn, Park Gunwook was the go-to, in which he happily carried out his duties with a large smile on his face. 

You first met on a sunny day when you had trouble with your farmwork chores. You were struggling to wrangle the pigs back to their pen, tripping over the mud, and eventually falling into a large puddle. 

He must have been watching over from a far, as the next thing you know an, arm is outstretched to you. “Need some help, Y/N?” 

You look up to see Gunwook, and you take his hand so he can hoist you up from the mud puddle.

“You know my name?” you ask innocently. Gunwook was fifteen at the time, and you, only twelve. 

“Silly girl, of course I know you.” he says as he fixes the bangs on your forehead, temporarily disheveled by the fall. At that moment, you felt it. The undeniable tug at your chest, drawing you to him. You had a feeling he was your soulmate, and your cheeks warmed at the thought.

You reckon he felt the same. For as the years went by, he stayed as a close friend to you. 

When you reached fifteen years old, marrying age, he started to see you more often. 

He would ask you to join him as he saddled up the horses by the stable, and you’d ask him to accompany you as you picked flowers by the meadow. You often talked about your dreams of seeing the world, leaving this small town and meeting new people. You dreamt of seeing all sorts of buildings, appreciating all kinds of art, trying new food, and experiencing new music. He always listened to you in awe, smiling at how passionate you become when talking about your dreams. He knows it’s your favorite thing to talk about.  

Gunwook on the other hand, spoke about inheriting the farm land from his father. He excitedly spoke about starting a little bed and breakfast inn where he could increase tourism in the area, allowing other folk to come experience the beauty of farm life. He once showed you the blueprint sketches he had of his proposed business venture, and with a gummy smile on his face, pointed to a house right by the meadow where your favorite flowers resided, “and here’s where we would live” he said. his cheeks were flushed red, nervous to see your reaction.

It was beautiful. He had promised to build it for you, confirming that he too, felt the same about you. That the both of you were meant to be together. 

“I know you’ve always wanted to get out of here. So I’ll save up for it, and we can both go on a large adventure someday” he reassures you. 

But you pictured the little farmhouse by the meadow where the two of you would live, running the bed and breakfast, and caring for the horses, pigs, and sheep. You suddenly didn’t mind having this quaint little life at all. 

“It’s perfect, Gunwook. I love it.” You reassured him too. 

Sadly, these were the last words you shared with him. The wedding never happened, the house was never built, and you were unable to experience being loved by Gunwook like you were meant to. 

Gunwook died the next morning, at the age of 18 years old. He was helping out the local lumberjack with a project in the forest, and fell victim to a horrible accident. The townspeople and your family spared you of the gory details, so you never got the full story of how he passed away. 

All you remember from that day was waking up and immediately feeling an emptiness in your heart. The tug at your chest was gone, a confirmation that he was dead. You cried. 

You wondered if the universe was giving you a sign, an out from the farm town life that you dreamed of leaving. And you couldn’t help but think: what a sick, twisted, way to communicate, universe.

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You tried to continue living life as you once knew it. But everything in this small town reminded you of Gunwook. You’d often visit the meadow where your forever house with him was meant to stand, journalling or speaking to the wind – hoping Gunwook would hear you. 

Your family let you grieve for two whole years, allowing the pain to fully wash over you so that you can learn to move on. Gunwook was your soulmate, everyone knew that. And at that time, the concept of having more than one soulmate was unheard of. You had already lost yours, and there was no way the universe would have another one for you. 

You weren’t exactly a widow, so you would have to live life as an unmarried woman – which was difficult in that day and age. This is why your father and mother brought up the prospect of arranged marriage, even if it’s just for the sake of living comfortably. You agreed. 

KIM TAERAE. SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD. YEAR 1925.

You came to know Kim Taerae at seventeen years old, when your father was sorting out marriage candidates. He had visited a local psychic who had given a shortlist of all the eligible bachelors in the area who would be the perfect match for you – insisting that ‘your soulmate would be one of the names on the list’. 

You would have called her a quack if the list didn’t include a certain Kim Taerae, a young gentleman three years older, who had a voice of an angel. You officially met at a chaperoned luncheon, with both your parents and his. He was soft, kind hearted, and had a gentle nature to him. 

You met several times after that before your families settled the marriage agreements. You didn’t mind marrying Taerae, in fact, you were scared to admit that he might actually be your soulmate too after all. You felt it during your first few meetings without your parents, the familiar pull at your chest. Eventually soothed by his singing and soft hums he would whisper into your hair. 

“Do you think we could be soulmates, Y/N?” he asked you one evening, you were both sitting on the porch of your family home with the stars as your audience. While he strongly believed you were his soulmate, you had a hard time. You weren’t sure if the universe allowed such a thing. 

“I don’t know, Taerae. I wonder if the universe is kind enough to gift you as my soulmate” you truly meant your words. He knew about your trauma with losing Gunwook, and would often accompany you as you visited his grave. He’s been patient with you, and was content with spending the rest of his life loving you, even if you weren’t soulmates. You felt the same way. 

That year, Taerae turned 21 years old. He was a year older, no longer frozen at 20. Likewise, you turned 18 years old. He got his blood tested to ensure the aging wasn’t a placebo effect, that there was indeed biological change. 

Everyone celebrated Taerae’s aging, the confirmation that the both of you were truly soulmates. You couldn’t believe it at first, but considered it as the universe’s way of saying ‘sorry’ for the loss of your first one. 

Taerae was excited to build a future with you. He even bought a house for the two of you at the capital of the country, and you were both eager to experience city life as a married couple. But that day never came. He died from a tragic car accident, a drunk driver crashed into his vehicle when he was on his way to see you. 

You woke up that day feeling like you were stuck in a recurring nighmare. You were drenched in sweat, and let out the most gut-wrenching scream of grief. You despised how this was all too familiar to you, the loss of the comforting tug at your chest. Taerae was dead, and you wailed for him.  

The car company gave you a free vehicle as part of the grievance. As if a free car would cure the immense grief and anger you had been feeling. To make matters worse, the community mocked you with a new nickname: soulmate killer. Because the mere idea of being your soulmate was an automatic death sentence. 

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You hated the universe. You were angry at its seeming generosity, rather cruelty of losing two soulmates at only 18 years old. 

After Taerae died, your family felt anguish for you. They had immense sympathy, and let you do whatever you wanted to do. You spent another two years grieving Taerae. Though you mostly stayed at home, staring into empty space. You still visited the meadow, this time with a guitar in hand to strum familiar melodies as you thought about the two men you loved. You felt that it was only fair to Taerae that way – if you had grieved him the same way you grieved Gunwook. 

It took you years before you could even feel like yourself again. 

In 1930, you would have been 23 years old. But you still look, act, and feel like a 20 year old. As if the universe was mocking your unfortunate situation. As if aging was a reward and a privilege you receive after meeting the love of your life. As if the universe was blissfully unaware that you have been ripped away from the opportunity thanks to its cruelty. 

You revisited your journal entries from when you were fifteen, talking about your big dream of seeing the world. You felt cursed, and you were determined to make the most of the seemingly short life you would have. After all, if your soulmates kept dying on you – who is to say that you aren’t next? 

So you took your free car, and set off on a road trip. And that’s when you met Seok Matthew, a man who sadly, understood you a little too well. 

SEOK MATTHEW. TWENTY YEARS OLD. 1930.

Matthew’s soulmate also died in a car accident earlier that year. His chosen method of grieving was to travel the world – discovering new places and meeting all sorts of people. That’s how the two of you met, line dancing somewhere in the south america. 

Matthew wasn’t your soulmate, you knew that for sure. But you spent the next five years traveling the world together, making love in cities he took you, and living life as reckless twenty somethings. With him, you were finally able to live out your dream. 

As you lay naked in the arms of Matthew in a hotel somewhere in Paris, he asked you “what if one day, one of us meets our soulmate?”. You adjust yourself to see him more clearly, fingers softly running through his hair. The thought has crossed your mind before, more for Matthew’s sake than your own. 

“It’s been five years Matt, I highly doubt I’m going to meet anyone else. But you might.” you try to foster a small smile, reassuring him he could still have a chance. Matthew has only lost one soulmate, while you’ve lost two. 

“No, I’d never leave you.” He sits up, a large pout on his face. His stubbornness amuses you. 

“That’s what you say now, sweetie.” you laugh as you kiss his pout away. "and you know it's probably for the best, people in my hometown call me soulmate killer, you know?" you try to play it off as a joke.

"soulmate killer? that's cruel. it's not your fault y/n. you know that right?" Matthew's brows are furrowed. You smile as you hold his face, releasing the tension in his forehead by massaging his eyebrows with your thumbs.

That night, he promised to stay in your life no matter what. 

But this promise turned hazy when on one of your trips to South Asia, he met the actual love of his life. You didn’t protest when he came back to your dingy hotel, head down and in tears. You didn’t argue as you watched him pack his bags, for a trip that you weren’t going to be part of. And you didn’t push him away when he asked to kiss you one last time before he left. You let him go, and you sobbed out of loneliness. 

Kudos to Matthew, he did keep his promise. He sent letters every few months to your PO Box, but you didn’t have the heart to open all of it. Last you’ve heard, they had baby number one on the way – and that was your last straw. You changed PO Box addresses shortly after that, unbeknownst to Matthew, who still sent you letters every year until his eventual death. 

This was the first man in your life to have a happy ending. He died of old age, with 3 children and 10 grandchildren. 

Something changed in the five years you spent with Matthew. More than falling in love with a person who wasn’t your soulmate, you fell in love with the world. You could never, ever imagine yourself going back to the domesticated life at home. The years after Matthew turned you into a cynic, and you didn’t believe in love anymore either. 

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PRESENT DAY. 2023.

“Got anything that’ll get me drunk in the next ten minutes?” 

You plopped down on the bar stool, haphazardly placing your purse next to you. The bartender is eyeing you strangely, as if in disbelief that you’re even inside their establishment. 

You sigh and pull out your identification card, a laminated piece of junk that tells you how old you really are. Scratch that, how old you are meant to be. He picks up the card and raises it up next to your face, comparing the woman in the picture to your face. It reminds you that you need to get it renewed…again. After all, the last time you updated your photo was sometime in the 80s. True enough, your ID card reflects a version of you with big hair and large colorful earrings. You don’t blame him for wanting to double check, contrasting the all black ensemble you have currently. 

“Listen pal, I just buried my daughter today. I would appreciate it if you could get on with it”. You might not blame him, but you are impatient. 

He slides your ID card back and pours you a whiskey on the rocks. “Sorry for your loss ma’am” he solemnly extends his condolences as he places your drink in front of you. You pick it up, raising it and nodding a “thank you” before taking a large gulp. It burns. 

You outlived your daughter. And you wonder if you’ve been going about life in all the wrong ways. Atop the alcohol display at the bar is a small TV, flashing a report about a young woman named Somi who was murdered and found dead at her home – leaving her husband a widower. The news station flashed a photo of the blonde couple, sharing that they had just gotten married a week ago. She was beautiful. A shame. 

As the news report slowly drowns you, your mind confronts you with the memories of your past soulmates and lovers. 

PARK GUNWOOK. The soulmate you never got the chance to fully love, and died in the year 1923. 

KIM TAERAE. The soulmate who was your second chance at life, and passed away in 1928. 

SEOK MATTHEW. Who helped you live out your dreams from 1930 to 1935. 

KIM JIWOONG. A man you married in the year 1940, who died from alcohol poisioning that same year. 

ZHANG HAO. The one who gave you your daughter in 1952, but unfortunately fell victim to a house fire. 

SUNG HANBIN. The husband that raised your daughter like his very own. But experienced a very fatal heart attack on the day of your daughter’s wedding in 1973.

Of course, there were others – flings and boytoys along the way. None of which were worth reminiscing about, except maybe for Kim Gyuvin. 

At that moment, a tall man enters the bar and decides to take a seat next to you. His presence effectively drew you out from the thoughts circling your brain. Other than the fact that he too, is dressed in all black – you feel a deeper sense of similarity. Like kindred spirits, you recognize broken souls like yours. You order two more rounds of the whiskey the bartender gave you. 

“I heard about your late wife in the news, I’m sorry for your loss.” You feign sympathy and slide the glass to the man next to you. 

He looks taken aback at first, but accepts your offer. Now facing you, he raises his drink to you. You do the same. He’s strikingly handsome, with platinum hair and dark eyebrows. You also don’t miss that he’s dressed in Yves Saint Laurent from head to toe. He takes a peek at your ID card still laying on the table, making sure to catch your name. 

“Next one’s on me, Y/N” he says, taking another swig at his whiskey, finishing his glass. He calls on the bartender, and buys an entire bottle for the two of you. The bartender returns his credit card, with the name ‘Shen Quanrui’ engraved. 

“Thank you Quanrui, that’s very generous of you.” 

He puts on a small smile, almost no one calls him by his legal name. “You can call me Ricky” he says as he pours into your glass. 

“Alright Ricky. Here’s to life.” you raise up. It feels inappropriate to be clinking glasses on the day you buried your daughter, but you figured you could make an exemption. Ricky too, seemed to be going through the same thing with his late wife. 

“To life.” he responds, tapping his glass against yours. 

Just two broken souls who had lost someone important in their lives, drinking to fill the hollowness. You almost don’t feel the familiar bloom in your chest, tugging at your entire being like a magnet trying to find its other half. And if you do feel it, you pretend it’s the whiskey burning its place in your heart. 

RICKY SHEN. TWENTY YEARS OLD. 2023. The man who you assume to be your next soulmate. 

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