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chaotic-on-main · 2 years ago

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Neighbors | ModernAU One-Shot

☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!OC and Hange Zoe x fem!OC

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ alcohol usage, expletives, adult themes, MINORS be cautious and DNI

☾ Author's note ➼ Hey guys, not gonna lie I was feeling it last night and this is the outcome of it. I'm not apologizing for my horny on main behavior, so... Anyways hope y'all enjoy! The February chapter for Unspoken Words is scheduled for this Monday. So if you've missed January, make sure to get caught up! Thanks lovelies!

☾ Word Count ➼ ~3.4k

A rainbow of lights flash in your eyes as you make your way through the writhing crowd. Bone vibrating bass pumps through your whole body and you can’t help but bob your head to the beat while the bar you set out to reach is in sight. It’s a Friday night and you find yourself in the busiest clubs downtown west of main street and you could not wait to drink the night away.

You were alone due to the rest of your very small pool of friends being unavailable, whether it be from working or spending the night with their significant other. Not that you were resentful though, you just wanted an escape and unfortunately that meant you had to go alone. Was it a bad decision? Maybe, but you didn’t care as you threw on your best fitting dress and most comfortable dancing heels you owned.

Flagging the bartender down, you dig through the small wallet you had stashed in your bra for loose cash. After a few moments, the lady behind the bar slides up to you and you shout for a couple shots of the cheapest vodka they have. All alcohol tastes bad but it achieved the same thing, you decided a while ago. There’s no reason to pay out the ass for it. When she returns with the shot glasses, you down them in one go as you slam them into the bar top. You hand her a $5 in tip with a smile and slip back into the crowd. You suddenly remember you hadn’t eaten much today so the alcohol takes effect faster than you intended to.

You couldn’t help but find solace in the heat of the bodies surrounding you. Of the loud music that deafened your hearing as well as your thoughts. You twist and turn to the beat, closing your eyes and feeling the warmth of the alcohol as it creeps its way through your system. You feel like you’re swimming as your head gets heavier and you laugh out loud into the air. This felt great. You felt comfortable.

Now let’s be honest, it’s not like you were on rock bottom. You had a steady job, your friends were great, and you were pretty content with where you were in life. But for as long as you could remember, there was a hole in your chest that you were never able to fill. You determined it was loneliness, but you often wondered if it was more complex than that. So no, you were not out here due to sadness, you know that for a fact. But for what it actually was, you still haven’t figured it out.

You lift your arms to stretch out above you as you move your body to the rhythm, eyes still closed in bliss. The smell of sweat and various colognes and perfumes permeate your senses as you’re pressed up against the people around you, not one of them paying you any attention. Well, except for one.

Someone gently grabs your waist and pulls you in their direction and when you open your eyes, you spot a feminine figure dressed in a tight pantsuit looking down at you curiously, as if they’re asking, ‘Are you okay with this?’ You smile widely at them and don’t fight against it, acknowledging that while you’re pretty tipsy, you’re still fully aware of your environment. They have brunette hair tied up in a messy ponytail and light brown eyes that bore into your own as they dance along with you. You hold on to them as you both sway, closing your eyes again to get lost in the euphoria of the liquor and the company.

After a moment, they lean down to your ear so you can hear them ask, “Can I get you another drink?” Their voice is playful, and you laugh with a nod. Lacing their fingers in yours, they lead you towards the bar again. They lean into the bar and shout something to the bartender, slapping cash down on the wood as they do. The bar isn’t as packed as the floor was thankfully, so when they turn back around to you with drinks in hand in no time, you’re not surprised. They hand it over to you and you smile gratefully at them then pull it to your lips. It’s sweeter and fruitier than you thought it would be, but it was great.

“I’m Hange!” They shout to you with a grin, taking a lengthy sip of their drink.

“Theo!” You yell back, doing the same with yours. Goddamn this is good.

“Slap me if I go too far, but you’re extremely attractive. Are you…?” They raise their eyebrow at you.

“You’re not so bad yourself. And no, I’m not seeing anyone right now.” You��ve had your fair share of crushes come and go, sometimes they went further than that. But for now, you were not preoccupied with anyone else. Their eyes sparkle at your response as they down the rest of their drink, then hold their hand out to you. You’re quick to throw back your own before grabbing their hand, your head now swimming. You follow them in a flushed daze.

You’re pulled back into the dancefloor with them, their arms around your shoulders as they hold you close. Hands travel every which way as your drunken stupor goes deeper. Still aware of your surroundings, but your inhibitions are slowly falling away, and you couldn’t care less. You find comfort in this chaos, of their breath on your face and the sweat rolling down your back. So, you two dance like that, disregarding the sticky skin and hair flying every which way.

Then their face leans down to you, hesitating as they hover above you with their eyes searching into yours. You can’t help but laugh again as you stretch up to meet their lips, using your arms around them to pull yourself up on the balls of your feet. Their lips are soft and filled with so much fervor that could only be a result from drunkenness. Your mouth moves along theirs in sync as you both hold each other close. When you break away, you can’t help but tip your head back in a fit of giggles. The drink Hange had gotten you was stronger than it tasted. And you were succumbing to the liquor faster than you had planned.

“How drunk are you?” They ask, playful but cautious.

“Yes!” You chirp with a laugh. But then after a moment, “The world is spinning.” You close your eyes to try and stop the motion but then open them back up quickly because doing so made the spinning worse.

“Let’s get some air!” They shout at you, and you nod slowly. You don’t fight as they tug you in some direction away from the crowd. Colors and lights blur pass like a long exposure film, and you can’t help but giggle again, though you’re not sure why. They stop after a moment, and you don’t notice quick enough, so you slam right into their back. The music is still reverberating through your whole body.

Hange’s talking to someone in front of them. There’s two people actually, a blonde man and a raven-haired man. You can’t make out what was being said, but they look over to you and you wave at them lazily. Wow, they're really handsome. The raven-haired man narrows their eyes at you, and you feel this itch in the back of your skull like you’ve seen him before. But when you try to rack your brain, the haziness is quick to distract you. Then the world starts spinning even faster and you clutch onto Hange’s arm for support.

“You’re really short.” You mumble and then suddenly they’re all reaching out to you at the same time. Huh, you think. Then blackness.

When you wake up, the first thought you think of is how you wish you hadn’t. Your head is pounding so much that you scrunch your eyes to attempt to make it go away. It doesn’t. The next thought that comes to you is how comfortable the thing you were laying on was, a bed maybe. There was at least a pillow under your head, so soft. The third thought is how wonderful yet foreign it smelled to you. Wait what? Your eyes snap open.

Your vision is blurry, but you blink a few times until you can see again. You see a forest green tapestry with doves hanging off the wall in front of you. This was most definitely not your room, and certainly not your apartment. Slowly, you travel your hands down your body to check if all of your limbs were still intact, discovering you were not in your dress. Instead, you feel a softer texture of a cotton shirt that was much too small for you as well as a pair of sweatpants that hugged your hips and barely reached your ankles. Thankfully your bra and undies were still present as well. At least you were clothed, but whose clothes were these? And who undressed you? The feeling of panic starts running cold through your veins as you wake up even more.

You’re in a bed lined with navy blue sheets and a thick white comforter is splayed across your body. There’s a noise coming from behind the door to your left, like someone was organizing metal pots and pans. You shoot up then quickly regret the decision. Falling back in the bed with a grunt, you flop your arm across your eyes to shield the light that filtered through a window that sat open, letting in the warm summer morning breeze. You peek under your arm to observe the rest of your surroundings.

It was a very simply decorated room. A desk with a couple picture frames placed deliberately on its surface sat in front of you. There’s a dresser and bookshelf off to your right, not a single piece of clutter in sight. Besides the tapestry and curtains, nothing else lined the walls. It was so… clean. The one thing that stands out to you, however, is the neat rack of multicolored skateboards next to the desk. Okay, seriously, where the fuck were you?

As your eyes travel towards the door where you heard the noise, you spot a glass of water as well as a couple of painkillers in a cup waiting on the bedside table. You reach for it slowly as you attempt to sit yourself up again, hands shaking from the hangover that is radiating through your whole body. You end up chugging the whole glass and it wakes your body up. With your mind alert now, you force yourself to swing your legs over the side of the bed. A wave of nausea hits you so hard that you take a moment before standing up. You have to use the wall to steady yourself. You remember the picture frames you saw on the desk, so you stumble over to get a better look at them, hoping to get an answer of where you were.

One of the frames shows a mother and her little boy, you assume. The mother is smiling widely as she holds on to a very toothy-grinned child. His black hair is fanned over his forehead, almost covering his piercing blue-gray eyes. They’re so happy. The other frame you saw had three people in it, arms over each other as they smiled for the picture. There’s a red head with choppy pigtails, a light dirty blonde male, and a raven-haired man which you suspect must be the older version of the boy in the other photo. They’re all wearing graduation caps and gowns. Wait, you've seen this man. Was he… the one from the club? Ugh, everything was so fuzzy.

Pressing your hand on the wall again for assistance, you pad your way to the door. You take a deep breath and pull it open slowly. You’re hit with the smells of freshly cooked bacon and eggs, which make your stomach do hurdles while also growling at the same time. When you make your way out the door, you see the source of the smell as well as the one cooking it. Their back is turned to you and all you see is a short statured man in an apron and some sort of white bandana pulling their hair back. You spot a back tattoo snaking its way up to the bottom of their neck, meeting just at their undercut. A gray long sleeve and black jeans don their lean body. You catch yourself staring without meaning to.

After checking to make sure you weren’t imagining the t-shirt and sweatpants on your body, you clear your throat to get their attention. They turn to you and you’re speechless. This was definitely the man from the club. Like the boy in the photo, their hooded eyes are stark gray in the light. Pale skin showcases heavy dark circles sitting on top of slightly puffy cheeks. His face shows no emotion as they stare at you, their sharp jawline set. You cover your chest with your arms as you’re feeling suddenly exposed at his gaze. They just raise an eyebrow at you quizzically.

“Hungry?” His deep voice bounces off the warm white walls. There’s heavy alternative playing softly from somewhere in the living space you stood in. You just nod, still unable to speak. He points to the dining table that sat in the corner of the small apartment and turns back around to tend to the food. You spot ear piercings climbing up both ears as the metal glints off the morning sun. Something still itched at you; Why did this man seem so familiar to you?

“Uh… we didn’t… do anything last night… right?” You eventually muster out, your face heating up at the insinuation. You plop yourself down on to the seat facing him.

“Tch, absolutely not. You were in no position to ask or receive anything last night.” He grumbles as he plates up the food before walking up to set them on the table in front of you. He has a plate for himself as well. “Eat, you need it.” He then leaves you to grab something out of the fridge. A wave of relief floods over you at the confirmation. You pick up the fork and dig in, reveling in the delicious simplicity of bacon and eggs. Your stomach decides to behave, for now.

He comes back with two glasses of orange juice and sets them down before falling back into his own chair. His white bandana is now forgotten, but his raven hair is slicked back from it, showing his whole face to you. You stop, fork mid-air, as you stare at him in awe. Up close, he was a very stunning man.

“What?” He inquires.

“Nothing, I- uh. Thanks for letting me crash. But who are you?” You take a sip of your juice. Oh my god, is this freshly squeezed?

“Seriously?” He stares at you incredulously.

“Um, yeah. My memory is pretty foggy, if that’s not clear.” You roll your eyes at him, taking another bite of your bacon.

“I’m Levi. You know, your neighbor? We’ve been neighbors for 3 years.” He pokes at his eggs but doesn’t take a bite. He’s staring down at them hard. You nearly choke on your food.

“Neighbors?!” You rack your head. It’s still fuzzy but you think you remember bumping into him a few times as you came and left your apartment intermittently. That’s right, he always had headphones on, and he wore glasses. Oh, this is some Clark Kent type shit, you think to yourself. You eye him carefully, trying to imagine glasses on him. Yeah, that was him.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I’m not one to pay attention to my surroundings.” You chuckle halfheartedly.

“I’ll say.” Levi mumbles. He’s still not looking at you.

“But why am I here? If we’re neighbors, why couldn’t you get me to my apartment?” It’s your turn to raise an eyebrow at him.

“I recognized you, offered to take you home. But then you didn’t have your key on you, and it was two in the morning, so the landlord obviously wasn’t around. And I wasn’t about to make you sleep in the open.” He’s picking at a piece of bacon now, averting his gaze still. Your eyes fall back to your half-eaten food.

“Oh. I- yeah. That’s probably for the best. Thank you.” Silence fills the air between you two again.

After a moment, “So you and Hange?” Memories from last night fill your brain and you actually laugh. Levi finally looks up at you in surprise, eyes widening a little bit.

“Oh that? No no, it was nothing. Just having some fun.” You swat in the air, looking back at him. Something like relief floods his face. He hums in response, then goes back to picking at his food. “Something wrong?”

“No, it’s fine. Anyways hurry up, I need to get to work soon.” You chuckle and shovel in the rest of your food. It really was delicious, as simple as it was.

When you’re finished, Levi takes the dishes to pile them in the sink before turning on you. You shift awkwardly on the balls of your feet as he studies you.

“So where are my clothes?” You wrap your arms around yourself again, thinking again of how little you were actually wearing in front of him.

“I hung them up in the bathroom. I’ll go get them.” He briskly walks off in a random direction. You’re left standing in the middle of the room as you hug yourself. You’re embarrassed for not recognizing him sooner. Or even acknowledging that he lived mere feet away. Then you start to think of how nice this morning was compared to your other post-outings. Bar the shame, you didn’t wake up hungover and empty. Something about this morning with him warmed you to the bone and you relished in it. Levi eventually comes back with your dress ironed out and hanging on a coat hanger as well as your heels neatly polished.

“Did you clean those for me?”

“They were disgusting, of course I did. You also could use a shower but I figured that would be crossing a line.”

Pursing your lips, you grab the dress and shoes from his hands and nod stiffly before muttering, “Yeah, I supposed that would.” After another beat of staring at each other, “Let me go change and you can have these clothes back.”

“No.” Levi raises his hand to stop you. “Just, wash them and give them back to me when you can.” He starts walking to the front door and you’re quick to follow. He hands you your wallet as well as a small silver key. “The landlord came by earlier this morning with a copy of your key.” You stare at it. He not only let you stay in a warm bed for the night, but he washed your clothes and fed you breakfast and now he went out of his way to make sure you had a way into your home. He took care of you. Your chest blooms in heat at such a kind gesture; it was such a foreign feeling.

“Thank you, for everything. And I’m sorry I put you in this position.” You step out into the hallway, making sure you had a tight grip on your things before turning around to face him.

“Don’t apologize, again I wasn’t about to leave you on the doorstep alone.” Alone, that word reverberates through your skull.

“Um. Well. Thanks, again. I’ll see you around, Levi.”

“Yeah, see you Theo.” His sharp eyes linger on yours for a moment, then shuts the door leaving you to your thoughts in silence. You never even told him your name, yet he knew. You’ve never said hello to him that you can remember, nor did you ever spare him a glance longer than 3 seconds. You’re not sure why you didn’t pay attention much before, but you are now. You want to chase the feelings he gave you in the last couple hours for the rest of your life, you decide. The sudden thought startled you.

“Well, shit.” You mumble to yourself

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sevendeadlywhispers · 9 months ago

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7Seals

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Chapter 18

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•Previous Chapter: Chapter Seventeen

•Next Chapter: Chapter Nineteen

•Chapter List

•New chapters every Thursday

•Content: Levi Ackerman × OC female. Slow Burn! Canon verse!

•Word Count: 3.2k

•Warning: This content may not be suitable for all readers. If you've watched all of AOT then you will understand that the show handles heavy subjects such as abuse, racism, violence, and other heavy subjects. This fanfiction will also have the same heavy themes. Chapters with heavy themes will be marked with (*) at each chapter.

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A/N: hey....

So I absolutely hate this chapter with all my soul. It took me a whole month to write. I'm so mad about how things turned out! Totally understand if y'all don't like it. I restarted and deleted this chapter so many times. Also super mad about how I wrote Levi in this chapter. I just want to hurry up and get to the 104th introductions but I have some more writing left before then. bare with me y'all. Sorry for the rant<3 (3-29-24)

I staggered into the pantry, my fingers fumbling over the shelves in search of something to drown out the chaos of my thoughts. But alas, Elenor had beaten me to it, leaving me to grumble under my breath about the injustice of it all. If only I hadn't spilled my flask earlier, I wouldn't be in this sorry state.

Elenor's grip on my ear was like a vice, yanking me away from my futile quest for solace. She muttered something about stains and salvaging, but her words were lost in the haze of my alcohol-addled mind. I stumbled along behind her, my steps unsteady and uneven.

"I can't believe you," she muttered, her disappointment evident in the furrow of her brow. "Do you have any idea how long it'll take to fix this mess?"

"Just dye it black," I suggested with a careless shrug, my focus already drifting elsewhere.

"You are not wearing black to the ball," she insisted, her tone brooking no argument.

"How about we just skip the ball altogether?" I proposed, hoping to evade the impending disaster. "I do it every year. Why change now?"

"You're going and that's an order."

Levi's voice pierced the air, sharp and commanding. Somehow he still managed to slice through the atmosphere even without the precision of a blade at hand. When he spoke, it was all eyes on him no matter where we were.

Startled, I spun around to face him, only to find his formidable figure looming behind me like the specter of authority he was. His expression was etched with a scowl, a silent warning of his displeasure. With his sleeves rolled up, his muscular forearms were on display, revealing how his time and effort had paid off. I couldn't help but notice the way his veins snaked beneath his skin. I watched his finger tap rhythmically against his bicep, a habitual gesture of restraint, he exuded an aura of controlled power that left me momentarily breathless.

I sensed the undercurrent of his pent-up frustration, knowing all too well that I was only adding fuel to the fire. Where had he disappeared to earlier that had left him in such a state of anger? Despite his efforts to conceal it, I could see right through him; after all, I knew Levi better than he knew himself.

"This early?" he remarked, striding closer to inspect the wine stain on my dress. "You're a mess."

"That's rich coming from you," I shot back, my words laced with a hint of defiance as I couldn't help but sneak a glance at the way his arms flexed with each movement. The faint traces of blood stained his sleeves, stark against the crisp white fabric, painting a picture of a man accustomed to trouble. Levi was like a magnet for chaos, and I couldn't shake the nagging thought of whose blood might be clinging to his clothes this time.

"I'm not trying to hide anything," he insisted, his tone laced with irritation. "Unlike you, I wasn't trying to flaunt it."

"Iris," Elenor chided, her voice tinged with exasperation. "Mind your manners. You drunk fool."

"I'm not even drunk!" I protested though the warmth in my cheeks betrayed me. In reality, I had indulged more than I should have, the remnants of last night's revelry still lingering in my system.

"Your cheeks say otherwise," Levi observed, his gaze piercing as he met my eyes. "Not to mention how boldly you're speaking to your captain right now."

"Cry me a river, we're off duty," I shot back, my defiance fueled by the liquid courage coursing through my veins.

"Iris!" Elenor's voice rang out, a note of panic creeping in as she attempted to salvage the situation. "I'm so sorry, Captain Levi. She's been drinking since she woke up. She's been nothing but defiant."

"Let's be honest, she probably never went to sleep after what happened last night. " Levi remarked, his eyes narrowing slightly as he assessed me from head to toe. There was a flicker of something in his gaze, a complex blend of disdain and... another emotion that eluded my drunken mind.

Last night?

"Oh, whatever," I huffed, spinning on my heel to stride away from the brewing tension. I refused to linger and subject myself to their judgmental gazes any longer. After all, it was just a minor mishap with some wine. What's the worst that could come of it?

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The sun hung lazily in the sky, casting a warm glow over our garden as I sprawled on the grass, my mother's voice fading into the background as my thoughts wandered to places they shouldn't dare tread.

"Iris," my mother's voice cut through the haze of my daydreams, pulling me back to reality with a jolt. I blinked, momentarily disoriented, before focusing on her expectant gaze.

"Yes, mother?" I replied, my tone innocent but my mind racing to come up with a suitable explanation for my absent-mindedness.

"What has captured your attention so thoroughly?" she inquired, her curiosity evident in the furrow of her brow. I hesitated, unsure how to articulate the forbidden desires that swirled in the depths of my mind.

How could I tell her that my thoughts had strayed to the forbidden realm beyond our walls? I longed to explore the unknown, to unravel the mysteries that lay hidden in the world outside. The very notion was absurd, blasphemous even. But the urge burned within me, impossible to ignore.

"Iris," my mother's voice snapped me out of my reverie once again, her tone firm but not unkind. I swallowed nervously, my mind still racing as I struggled to find the right words.

"I was just... thinking," I mumbled, my gaze fixed on the ground as I avoided her probing stare.

"About what?" she pressed, her patience wearing thin as she awaited my response. I took a deep breath, steeling myself for her reaction.

"Beyond the walls," I admitted, the words tumbling from my lips in a hushed whisper. My mother's gaze softened, her eyes following mine as we both turned to face the looming structure that cast a shadow over our lives.

The weight of my mother's disappointment hung heavy in the air, she gazed at me, as if realizing a truth she had long hoped to avoid. I could see the reluctance etched in the lines of her face, the weariness of someone who had fought against inevitability and lost.

"I didn't expect you to be interested so soon," she admitted, her voice tinged with a hint of regret as she set aside our books, her movements slow and deliberate.

"But it seems the time has come for you to learn one of life's most important lessons, Iris."

"Are those ugly things truly that important?" I frowned, gesturing towards the looming walls that loomed on the horizon, their imposing presence a constant reminder of the boundaries that confined us. My mother's gaze hardened, her eyes narrowing slightly as she fixed me with a stern look.

"You must take this seriously, Iris," she admonished, her tone leaving no room for argument.

"Yes, Mother," I replied, my voice tinged with defeat as I slumped back against the grass, the weight of her expectations pressing down on me like a heavy burden. Why couldn't this be a simple answer, a straightforward explanation that made sense to my young mind?

"Good, now listen closely," my mother began, her voice carrying the weight of centuries-old wisdom. "Those walls represent safety and security to all of us. They protect us from the dangers lurking beyond. It's only natural to be curious, but it can also be deadly. We must remember the blessings we have within these walls."

"What's out there that's so dangerous?" I interjected, unable to contain my curiosity any longer. The thought of unseen dangers lurking just beyond our reach sent a shiver down my spine.

My mother took a long, deep breath, closing her eyes briefly as if gathering her thoughts. I watched as her hands tensed up before she released her breath, her gaze meeting mine with a solemn intensity I had never seen before. It was a look that spoke of fear, of caution, of a mother's desperate plea to protect her child from the harsh realities of the world.

"Iris, dear," she started, her voice a soft murmur carrying the weight of untold history, "what lies beyond these walls is a realm of nightmares. Creatures known as Titans roam freely, devouring anything in their path. They're not merely monsters; they're the harbingers of chaos, the embodiment of primal fear."

Titans. The word hung in the air, heavy with the weight of the unknown. I felt a thrill of excitement course through me, mingled with a hint of fear. How had I never heard of these creatures before? What other secrets lay hidden within the confines of our walls, waiting to be discovered?

"Have you seen one?"

"Iris," my mother's voice cut through the air like a knife, sharp and cold. It was a tone she rarely used. I felt my excitement retreat, replaced by a somber silence that enveloped us like a heavy fog.

"No, I have not," my mother finally replied, her voice tinged with a hint of sadness. "I've only heard stories."

"Stories?" I echoed, leaning in closer, eager for any scrap of information about these elusive creatures. "What kinds of stories?"

"The gruesome kind," she answered curtly, her gaze distant as if she were reliving memories best left forgotten.

"So these Titans, they're the reason we can't go beyond the walls?" I pressed, my mind racing with questions and possibilities.

"Exactly," my mother confirmed, her voice firm. "That's why we must stay inside the walls. We are safest within the confines of Wall Sina."

"Has anyone ventured outside the walls?"

"Yes, the Scouts."

"Do you think I could ever—?" I began, only to be swiftly cut off by my mother's stern interjection.

"It is forbidden," she stated firmly, her tone brooking no argument.

"But what about Father?" I persisted, determined to uncover the truth behind my father's mysterious comings and goings. "He always talks about protecting the walls. Is this why? Does he go beyond them?"

A shadow passed over my mother's features, her expression clouded with sadness as she spoke of my father's unwavering dedication to his beliefs. "Your father serves the walls in his own way, my dear," she explained gently. "But his duty lies within these walls, among the faithful who uphold the sanctity of our home."

"Swear on your life, Iris, that you will never attempt to breach the walls."

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The wind howled mournfully, chilling me to the bone as I stumbled through the neglected garden. Dead bushes clawed at my clothes, snagging on the fabric as I pressed forward. The iron gate groaned in protest as I forced it open, the rusted hinges screeching in the darkness. The darkness swallowed the stars, leaving me to navigate by instinct alone. Despite the absence of the moon's guiding light, I pressed on, my steps unsteady and my mind clouded by one too many glasses.

I felt like a lost soul navigating the depths of hell. The darkness was all-consuming, swallowing the stars and leaving me to fend for myself in a world devoid of light.

As I collapsed onto the unforgiving marble bench, the cold seeped into my bones, a cruel reminder of my frailty. My mind was a whirlwind of confusion, my thoughts scattered like leaves in the wind.

Why did I drink this much? What was I trying to forget?

"Get up," Levi's voice pierced through the fog of my thoughts, his tone as sharp as a blade but I refused to yield. His hand reached out to help me, but I recoiled instinctively, my body tensing at the thought of his touch.

"No," I protested, my voice a defiant whisper as I clung to the bench for dear life. "I'm fine."

But the darkness pressed in, weighing me down like an anchor, my limbs heavy with exhaustion and regret. With a frustrated grunt, Levi hoisted me to my feet, his grip around my arm as he dragged me from the bench.

"You're a mess. A sloppy fucking mess," Levi muttered under his breath, his irritation palpable as he struggled to keep me upright. I leaned into him, my head spinning with each faltering step.

"You sound just like him," I muttered, my words slurred and barely coherent as I stumbled alongside him. Levi's touch felt suffocating, his fingers digging into my sides like claws as he propelled me forward.

"Let go," I pleaded weakly, but Levi remained steadfast, his determination unyielding as he pulled me closer. "Please."

But my protests fell on deaf ears, Levi's grip unrelenting as he guided me toward the safety of the house. With each step, I felt the weight of my past bearing down on me, the memories clawing at my consciousness like a ravenous beast.

My breath was taken away as I flung myself out of his grip and on the cold cement.

When will I stop flinching at the slightest brush of a hand, my body recoiling instinctively from any hint of closeness? When will I shed this suffocating cloak of fear that wraps itself around me like a second skin, a constant reminder of the horrors I've endured? When will I find the strength to stand tall, to reclaim my body as my own, untainted by the memories of pain and betrayal? When will I stop cowering from a man's touch, and learn to trust again?

After four years, I'm still fighting for peace.

"I said let go," I whimpered, my voice trembling with fear as Levi knelt beside me, his touch gentle against my clammy skin. "Don't touch me."

But Levi ignored my pleas, his patience wearing thin as he lifted me off the ground once more. I felt his strong arms snake underneath me, effortlessly hoisting me off my feet once again. My head bounced against his chest as he carried me, his expression stoic as ever. Despite my resistance, I couldn't help but feel a pang of gratitude towards him, a flicker of warmth in the cold darkness that threatened to consume me.

"God, you smell like a bar," he groaned as he carried me into the house, his voice tinged with annoyance.

Levi's frustration simmered beneath the surface as he carried me up the stairs to my room, his steps deliberate and measured. Despite my drunken haze, I couldn't help but sense the tension radiating from him, like a storm brewing on the horizon. But I was too preoccupied with the swirling chaos in my mind to dwell on his mood.

As he deposited me onto the bed with more force than necessary, I let out an indignant grunt, my limbs splayed out like a ragdoll. Levi's jaw clenched with barely contained anger, his eyes flashing with a mixture of concern and irritation. But I was too intoxicated to notice, too lost in my world of blurred lines and fragmented memories.

"You're a damn fool, Iris," he muttered under his breath, his tone laced with exasperation. "Do you have any idea how dangerous it is to drink yourself into oblivion like this?"

I waved his words away dismissively, my mind drifting in and out of consciousness. "Relax, Captain," I slurred, a lazy smirk playing on my lips. "It's not like I'm the first soldier to drown their sorrows in a bottle."

Levi's expression darkened at my flippant response, his frustration mounting with each passing moment.

"You think this is funny, Iris?" he snapped, his voice sharp and cutting. "You could have gotten yourself killed out there tonight."

I blinked up at him, the severity of his words finally registering through the fog of alcohol. For a brief moment, I saw the worry etched into his features, the genuine concern that lay hidden beneath his gruff exterior.

But then the moment passed, and I was back to see him as just another authority figure trying to control my every move.

I was in Wall Sina, what's the worst that could happen to me? It's not like a Titan is going to appear randomly here.

"Always the overprotective captain, aren't you?" I teased, a mischievous glint in my eye. "What are you gonna do, put me on kitchen duty for a month?"

Levi's reaction was immediate, his jaw tensing as a flicker of annoyance danced in his steel-gray eyes. He let out a heavy sigh, his frustration palpable as he reluctantly took a seat beside my bed.

"Your insolence knows no bounds," he muttered, his tone laced with a fit of simmering anger. "Perhaps scrubbing the mess hall will help rein it in. Your behavior has been unacceptable."

"Do you even realize how reckless you've been?" he chastised, his voice tinged with exasperation. "You're a walking disaster, leaving a trail of chaos everywhere you go. It's exhausting having to clean up after you time and time again."

"Then don't."

"I'm your Captain. It's my job."

I watched him with bleary eyes, the room spinning around me in dizzying circles. Despite my best efforts to focus, everything seemed to blur together in a haze of confusion and disorientation. Levi's presence beside me was both comforting and unsettling, his silent vigil a stark reminder of how much I had let him down.

"Why are you still here?" I slurred, my words barely audible above the pounding of my own heart. "Shouldn't you be off saving the Walls or something?"

Levi's gaze bore into mine, his frustration seeping as he held my drunken gaze.

"We're leaving first thing tomorrow morning," he reiterated his tone firm but tinged with a hint of concern that he couldn't quite conceal.

"I don't have time to babysit a drunken fool."

I chuckled, the alcohol dulling the sting of his words. "Well, lucky for you, I'm a pro at taking care of myself," I quipped, my words slurring slightly as I struggled to maintain my composure.

Levi's expression softened for a moment, a flicker of something akin to amusement dancing in his eyes before it was replaced by a mask of stern resolve.

"This isn't a joke, Iris," he insisted, his voice cutting through the haze of my inebriation. "You need to take this seriously."

I waved him off dismissively, my hand swatting at an imaginary fly as I leaned back in my seat. "Relax, Captain," I replied, a lazy grin spreading across my lips. "I've got it all under control."

Levi's jaw clenched, his patience wearing thin as he struggled to rein in his frustration.

I shrugged nonchalantly, my gaze drifting lazily around the room.

"Hey, we're still alive, aren't we?" I countered, my tone flippant as I brushed off his concerns. "What more do you want?"

Levi opened his mouth to respond, but I was already drifting off, the weight of exhaustion pulling me into its embrace. His words faded into the background as sleep claimed me, leaving me to drift away into a sea of dreams.

When will this end?

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