#halsey stan first human second

[dxllfaces]

don’t talk 2 me

[nightswithkookmin]

Goldy I never thought I would reach out to any Jikook blog but after your last post I have to. I am an east asian american and trans. I have never spoken on this issue, commented or posted about this. I am a Jikook supporter but sometimes Jikook supporting blogs don't feel like the friendliest place. I want to thank you for changing my opinion on that. It is an insult to BTS to say Jikook don't know they seem gay or that they don't know what gay looks like. It is an insult to fans like me to say it would be OK to do the things they do if they were cisgendered straight men. I personally saw a few people say or dance around this and they got intimidated by big blogs for it. I would never name names because I beleive in free speech and the right of people to express themselves, as long as it isn't hate speech. Supporting lgbt people and making sure they don't feel endangered is MORE IMPORTANT THAN STANNING A KPOP BAND and I say this as a 4 year long bts and Jikook stan. So many people don't want to touch this issue and I understand why.

But thank you for supporting ACTUAL lgbt people as well as bts and showing stubborn people that BTS mean gay rights when they say gay rights.

I don't know why but this Ask made me cry...

I've been reading it over and over for the past two days and each time I feel humbled by it. Thanks so much for sharing this with me.

I think the era of the obsessed 'kids' and '13 year old shippers' in this space is coming to an end. I think it's time for a more nuanced mature conversation on what it means to ship and stan our faves in today's sociopolitical climate.

Let's intellectualize shipping and use it as a vehicle for social change not just pleasure. Sabotaging political hashtags is a start. Trending and donating to BLM is equally important. Fighting for gay rights and recognition is the next step and a natural progression from here- and about damn time!

Gone are the days where celebrities and idols were immune to accountability and personal responsibility. We live in a world where everyone is required to be converstant in and sensitive to social issues. Awareness is woven into our collective consciousness and for some of us we cannot divorce that from our pleasure receptors.

Hate to quote my pastor but, 'As a kid, I spoke, thought and reasoned like a kid. As I grew up, chilee darling, I put my ghetto ways aside. You feel me?' Lol. Yea, my pastor hood like that. Lol.

The fact of the matter is, BTS has a higher mature demographics now. Majority of us grew with them, if not past them. They are not seventeen anymore, Jin is almost thirty, the youngest in the group is past twenty three and majority of their fanbase are breaching Young Adult well into Adulthood and beyond.

We simply cannot view them with the same lens anymore. If we did, we would be infantilizing them if not enabling them.

We ought to be able to have certain conversations that reflect our age, hearts, backgrounds, experience, values and beliefs.

We can't sit behind our television sets and smart phone screens in this day and age and assume BTS sat through a performance like this and did not for a second think about what it meant, why the crowd cheered at certain moments or even understand the impact, message and intent behind it- especially not when Halsey, an openly bisexual woman and advocate for LGBTG rights is an acquaintance of thiers.

I don't know how a fraction of this fandom can assume BTS would have a collaboration of this nature and not know anything about the gay rights discourse or what queer baiting is or not consider how their actions may or may not be contributing to the marginalization of persons as these- to not have agency and personal responsibility or empathy.

JK cannot stan a gay artist such as Troye Sivan and divorce his music from his sexuality because it flows from it. Not when Troye has openly spoken about the struggles he went through as a closeted gay man, coming out and how that affected his mental health.

JK knows what gay is, he is aware of the struggles queer people face on a daily. His decision to cover, license and recommend songs by this artist is a deliberate act coming from a place of being informed on the matter.

Jimin knows. RM knows. Suga knows.

BTS cannot prepare a speech like this while oblivious to the plight of the LGBTQ plus community. I refuse to believe that simply because it's not true. Anyone who says otherwise is a scammer. Lol.

And I think they are intelligent enough to have cognisance of the fact majority of the world view certain aspects of their home culture as problematic and non-progressive and that this same world is watching them and what they do in this space matters.

They are part of the conversation. And it's in their interest to present themselves as queer a queer friendly band and company by distinctifying themselves from these 'traditional' Kpop bands.

I believe they know that being woke gives them a competitive advantage as MCs and advocates for the youth in today's world.

I believe they are aware certain things in their 'fan service culture' doesn't fly in the space they compete in and want to compete in. They are competing and rubbing shoulders with top LGBTQ plus advocates, sharing seats with them at awards, standing next to them- they best to look sharp.

It's obtuse for anyone to fall on the 'culture' rhetoric to excuse certain behaviors of their idols when actual queer people from and within that same culture fight against it.

Most S. koreans I know and have come across complain about their 'culture' and some even harbor strong resentments against this whole fanservice culture.

Holland, an openly gay Idol from South Korea, has equally spoken out against the 'fan service' culture prevalent within Kpop on several occasions and laments how it depoliticizes queerness and affects actual queer people within S.K.

And isn't it funny that the same conservative Christian population who strongly oppose homosexuality in S.K often lead online campaigns against Jikook for 'promoting homosexuality' because of certain fanservice and skinship they do?

If skinship is normal and fanservice is culture, why does conservative S.K keep pushing back against it? It's their culture uno?! Lmho.

Queer south Koreans and conservative Christians hate fanservice culture and yet here we are using their culture to defend it as if it's all black and white. Lmho.

Did they or did they not see South Korean's reactions to this performance by Jikook? The mixed feelings most had about it?

Men can nibble on men's ear but God forbid they toss them in the air and catch em💀

South Koreans are not a monolith. Their culture is nuanced like any culture. It's not static and not clear cut black and white either.

It's one thing to respect other's culture, it's another to perpetuate it in ignorance. Perpetuating their culture and being religious about it does not allow for the dynamism inherent in their culture.

Troye Sivan talked about how he'd stop in the middle of his concerts and performances upon seeing the hyper fangirls in the front row and then think to himself, 'I know they know I'm gay, so why are they still here...'

And this was before he came out.

Jikook know we know they are queer or that we think of them as queer. When Jimin talks about 'those that love me for me' he knows exactly what he is talking about or rather who he is talking to- it's not these hets I'm afraid.

Troye also talked about being privileged because he lived in a rather queer friendly neighborhood where everyone is gay and so he'd always felt safe coming out.

Isn't that what JK is doing?

Now this is a person who's without a doubt had a lot of influence on JK in his early formative years as an Idol right down to his decision to move into a much queer friendly neighborhood of Itaewon.

They know we know. Jikook is gay.

Thankfully, there are reports of a rising number of LGBTQ plus in South Korea, a lot of allies, a lot of queer folks coming out and a lot of companies opening up to working with gay idols and aspiring idols.

It's such a relief but a lot of work still needs to be done and I stand with them on behalf of Jikook and any queer folk in SK.

My sister is helping me reach out to an LGBTQ plus advocate from Seoul for an interview for my blog. If everything goes well, I'd love for her to share her thoughts on queer passing, queer baiting and fan service within Kpop and how that affects LGBTQ youth in South K.

It's a conversation I'm really passionate about and interested in.

I love me some ships, but I also love me some queer advocacy and human rights uno? Lol.

Thing is, I may quit BTS one day, but I can never quit being me. Being human. Always put the human first is my motto.

Oh and I hear people are plotting to cancel me? Chilee. Y'all do that but:

Let it echo.

Signed,

GOLDY

[taylorinthetardis]

Wallflowers - A Henry Cavill x Reader fic

So I did a thing! Rather than continue to work on my larger, more complicated Pride and Prejudice fic, I decided to make a fanfic out of the fantasy I had at work the other day!

There will most likely be a part two to this, I just thought I was at a good stopping point and wanted to see what you guys thought about it.

Full disclosure: I didn’t mean for this to whole ass turn into a Bath and Body Works ad, but it kinda did. For those of you reading in countries that do not have Bath and Body Works, its basically just a body and home care store. In the US their scents are legendary. Pretty much every young girl went through a BBW phase where that was all they used for soap and perfume. That all being said, in the interest of further disclosure and covering my ass, I own neither Bath and Body Works nor any of the trademarks on the scents listed herein. I also do not own Henry Cavill because owning human beings is a crime.

This is my first Henry fic so be gentle with me! It’s a bit longer than I had anticipated and un-beta’d.

Warnings: just a lot of fluff. some self-deprecation. loads of swearing. don’t know if I should warn for slight bashing of the religious but I will anyway so no one gets mad at me.

Wallflowers

It was shaping up to be another boring ass day at Bath and Body Works. I had started working here during the Pandemic after I was laid off from my job at the movie theatre. I had planned on it only being temporary, but even after things got better and I got my theatre job back, I decided to stick around. What can I say; a bitch is broke. Nothing wrong with double-dipping.

There was something about Sunday mornings in the mall. Probably because people around here still went to church in the mornings. Like it matters. Sunday mornings are always so slow, here and at the theatre, but the day always picks up after 1, when morning church services finish. It was me and Samantha up in the front room this morning, working out the leftover boxes from yesterday’s shipment. She was one of the first people I really bonded with here, both of us being super into both Marvel and DC, specifically Sebastian Stan and Henry Cavill. They had just started filming the next Superman movie and they were going to be shooting scenes up in Michigan again, like they had for Dawn of Justice.

“I’m just saying, we should really consider asking for a few days off and just going up there and scoping it out. I mean, it’s Henry fucking Cavill. He’s less than an hour away from us. Right now. Less than an hour. When is that ever gonna happen again? I can use some of my vacation time at the theatre, so at least I’m not missing out on money from them. It’ll be a blast. I mean, what’s the worst that can happen? We don’t see him? I mean at least we’d have tried. I’d rather try than stay down in stupid Ohio with the knowledge that he’s that close.”

“Do you really think Ann’s going to give us time off to stalk Superman?”

“We ain’t gonna tell her what it’s for! Just lie, c’mon now.” I laughed. I dropped a box of Gingham body cream into the understock drawer and broke the box down. Out of the corner of my eye I caught movement, oh goodie, a customer. Samantha was quicker to greet them.

“Welcome to Bath and Body… OH MY GOD!” I turned around and was met with the sight of none other than Henry fucking Cavill, sheepishly running his hand through his now jet-black curls, obviously embarrassed at having been recognized. Damn, am I glad I put make-up on this morning. Alright Y/N, this is your fucking chance. For once in your damn life, be fucking cool. You can do this. You look good, you smell like Champagne Toast, you’ve got this. I pulled my hair down from its messy bun and shook it out a bit before walking over to where Samantha was still trying to collect herself. The store radio started playing Halsey’s Bad at Love and I had to bite my lip to stop myself from bursting out laughing at the absurdity of the situation we were now in. Not five minutes ago we were talking about seeking him out and now here he was in all his brick-shithouse-ness. I looped my arm through Samantha’s in a show of support.

“What a wonderful coincidence! We were just talking about you and now here you are! It’s crazy how the universe works, isn’t it? I’m Y/N, this is Samantha; what can we help you with today, Henry?” I smiled my most adorable smile at him, the one that makes my little cheek dimple pop out, and, honestly, they both looked shocked. Samantha was clearly surprised that I was more capable of speech than she was, and to be honest so was I, and Henry seemed shocked that I would openly admit that we had been talking about him before he got there, which probably wasn’t a great thing to say, but I panicked.  

“Well, I was told this was the best place to go for candles and air freshener-y type things. The house I’m renting just has this odd odour that I can’t get rid of. I’ve been airing it out during the day, all the windows open, and I come home and it still smells funky. I know I could just find a different place, but it’s close to a park and that’s been nice for Kal and I don’t want to make a fuss, so…” Henry sort of shrugged, the buttons on his plaid shirt straining with the movement of his broad shoulders, and gestured around the store as if to say “that’s why I’m here”.

“Well, you’ve definitely come to the right place. All of our home care is in the second room, grab a basket, I’m sure we can find you some scents you’ll like.” He walked over to the basket tower to grab one as a couple more customers walked in. Samantha nudged me towards the second room; I was going to have to handle Henry alone for now, it seemed. He followed me over to the Wallflower wall. “So, these are our Wallflowers. They’re sort of like the Glade Plug-ins, I don’t know if you’ve seen those, you plug this diffuser into any power outlet and screw the fragrance bulb in and it diffuses the scented oil into the room. They last for about a month or so. These’ll probably be the best option for you, well these and maybe a room spray or two to start with. The candles are good, but obviously the scent is gonna be strongest when they’re burning and it’s probably not a great idea to light a bunch of candles and then leave for the whole day.”

He chuckled. “No, I’d say you’re right about that. I definitely don’t want to burn the place to the ground. Are there any scents that you’d recommend?”

“Well, I mean, it obviously all depends on your personal preferences. I like sweet scents. I like my space to be smelling like a bakery or a candy shop at all times, so I tend to go for anything like that. We actually still have some of our holiday scents that we’re trying to get rid of and there’s this really great one in that line called Spiced Apple Toddy. It smells like apple pie. I love it. It’s only out during fall and winter so I stocked up. I need it all year long, honestly. I still have so many other scents at home, but like I’m probably never gonna get sick of it, for real, it smells so good. Or I might go every other month swapping between that and Black Cherry Merlot because that’s awesome too. And then there’s Champagne Toast, I mean, that one might be a bit too feminine for you, but I love it. It’s sweet and just a tiny bit citrusy. I can’t do any of the floral or like, outdoorsy scents, they set my allergies off. And honestly there’s some of these that I smell them and I’m like, who is putting this in their house? Like, what nutjob thinks this scent is good? How many people have senses of smell that are this screwed up?” At this point I was rambling, talking excitedly and with my hands, handing him testers to smell and trying to gauge his reactions to know what to hand him next. He didn’t have any bad reactions to anything I gave him until I handed him the tester for Fresh Balsam. His nose scrunched up in the most adorable way and he very carefully set the tester down on the counter as far from him as he could manage. He handled my word-vomit good-naturedly, with a small smile on his face, nodding and chuckling when he thought something I had said was funny. Our fingers brushed a few times as I handed him the testers and after the third time, I began to feel like it was deliberate on his part, but it couldn’t have been, could it? He couldn’t really be interested in me. He’s Henry Cavill. I’m just, well, I’m just me.

Me, with my two minimum wage jobs, still living with my parents, inching ever closer to 30 years old. Why would he want any of that? Why would he be interested in me physically either? I mean, he’s literally flawless and I’m short, overweight, I eat like shit, I don’t exercise, hell, I barely know how to put on make-up correctly. Yeah, I look good today, but that’s not par-for-the-course.    

He put a few each of Cinnamon & Clove Buds, Black Cherry Merlot, Limoncello (for the bathrooms, he said), and Laundry Day (for the laundry room, obviously) in his basket along with enough of the plugs so he’d have one in each room. He also grabbed a Black Cherry Merlot and a Limoncello room spray off the shelf next to the Wallflower display before turning back to me. “So then, where do you keep this Spiced Apple Toddy that you like so much, or did you hide them so you could have them all to yourself?”

I chuckled nervously and ran my hand through my hair, sort of disbelieving that he was actually paying attention to what I had said. Boys never listen to me when I talk, I always have to repeat myself, but I guess that’s because I usually end up talking to the dumb ones. Henry’s not dumb. He really is just fucking perfect, isn’t he? Pretty and he listens? That shouldn’t be such a difficult combination to find, but for me it had been. “They’re on the table over here with the rest of our leftover Christmas stuff. Hopefully the tester is still there somewhere.” I put my hands in my apron pockets and I could feel the jolt of confidence I had had just minutes before leaving my body. His charm had worn me down, bringing me back to my normal, anxiety-ridden self. I caught the toe of my boot on the corner of one of the other tables as we walked towards the center of the room. I stumbled, but before I could fall his arm was already out to steady me, wrapping around my waist to keep me upright.

“Are you alright Y/N?” A look of genuine concern was on his face and I swear to God I swooned. Like, fuck, I just stubbed my stupid toe, it’s not that serious. I mean yeah, I stubbed my toe and then almost fell into a table covered with candles in glass holders, but like, I didn’t fall, you caught me, please stop looking at me like you care. You can’t give me that much hope. It isn’t fair. And goddamnit I love the way my name sounds coming out of your mouth. Like, fuck it’s never sounded so good. This isn’t fair, why is this happening?

“Yeah, Henry I’m fine, just a stubbed toe. Thank you for…you know.” I gestured down to his arm, which was still around my waist. The sound of me bumping into the table drew the attention of the rest of my co-workers, however, who were now coming out of their various positions to see what was going on and to make sure no one had broken anything. Samantha popped her head in from the front room and Kelynn and Mira came out from the cashwrap with Pilar and walked to the edge of the third room to peek in. All they saw was me, blushing profusely, with Henry Cavill’s beefy-ass arm still wrapped around my fucking waist. “Everything’s fine guys. I promise.”

“Holy shit, is that…”

“Mira!”

“But Kelynn that’s fucking Superman!”

“You can’t cuss in front of him Mira, he’s a customer!”

“Will you guys cut it out? You’re embarrassing us in front of the hunky British dude!”

“Hey, I’ve got an idea. How about we all pretend like this isn’t happening right now? Pilar can go back to the cashwrap, you two can go back to whatever it was you were doing, and I’ll go back to what I was doing, namely making a damn sale!” I extricated myself from Henry’s grasp so I could shoo them back towards the cashwrap. They turned and walked away, bewildered looks on their faces. I turned back to Henry who was shifting awkwardly from foot to foot, clearly uncomfortable. He cleared his throat and ran his hand through his curls, leaving them messier than they were before. An errant one fell over his forehead and I wanted to brush it out of the way, but he just left it.

I walked over to the table that I was originally heading for and found the Spiced Apple Toddy Wallflowers. There wasn’t that many left, but there was still a tester. I grabbed it and spun around to bring it to him, assuming he hadn’t followed me, but as I turned, I found myself going face first into his massive chest. I put my unoccupied hand up to steady myself and pushed on his chest to force him back. He was just too close. Why was he so close? He opened his mouth to say something but I beat him to it. “Here. This is what I have in my bedroom right now, this is Spiced Apple Toddy.” Oh god, why did I say it like that? The one I have in my bedroom. Jesus Christ. He quirked his eyebrow at me and cocked his head to the side, smirking a little. Instead of taking the tester from me, he took my much smaller hand in his, guiding it up towards his face so the tester was close to his nose. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. A serene smile spread across his face and I felt my face get hotter. He opened his eyes, looking down into mine. Fuck I could drown in those ocean eyes.

“Oh, I like that very much. You were right. I think that one’s my favourite.”

[that-little-zebunny]

Song Prompt Writing Challenge!

Zephy's 500 Bunnies Celebration 😍💜

Edited post

So I kinda wanna do something for reaching 300 followers that I still can't believe I got! And for my first anniversary with Tumblr and Fan Fic life <3 Thanks ya’ll~!! This is one dissension I did that I’ll never regret because I’ve met wonderful people and I am pretty sure more is to come.

So Here’s what I got, Let’s do some Song prompt Challenge using my (as people around me would say) intensely weird song choices, which I don’t agree with. I just love music that calls to my soul.

PS. Thank you so much to @book-dragon-13​ for letting me use her writing challenge as guide for this is my first time making one. Here’s the link of the challenge if ya’ll want to check it out.

Rules:

Choose a song and a character of the following actors or the actor himself: Tom Hiddleston, Sebastian Stan & Jensen Ackles.

AUs are accepted (Just note it properly)

Send me an Ask of the song you want and the pairing you’ll use.

One song per person only.

Kindly use the Read More code-thingy for fics exceeding 500 words

Strictly NO Incest, Underage/Phedophilia ships, Rape, Non/Dub-con, Cheating and Racist content.

Fluff, Angst and Smut are okay just put up the proper warning if needed.

Tag me @that-little-zebunny and use the hashtag #500bunniesforzephy

Deadline: July2020

Song Prompts:

Alice by Nahko (Nahko and Medicine For The People)

Born This Way by Lady Gaga

Eight by Sleeping at last

Ghost by Halsey

Godzilla by Kesha

Hair by Lady Gaga

Heart by Sleeping at last

Human by Cher Lloyd

Human by Rag’n’Bone Man for Bucky by @marvelgirl7

Hurricane by Thirty Seconds to Mars

Icarus by Bastille

Like Real People Do by Hozier

Little Me by Little Mix

Look what I found by Lady Gaga

Mad Hatter by Melanie Martinez for Jefferson by nano-raptor

Make you mine by Us the duo

One way ticket by One ok rock

Saturn by Sleeping at last for Chris Beck by @jobean12-blog  FOLLOW THE STARS HOME

Take Me Home by Us the duo

Young and Beautiful by Lana Del Ray for Bucky by @cherryblossomskye

[reputationn]

Rules: Answer questions and tag 20 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better.

I was tagged by @ohh-goddamn thx for tagging me Nat <3

Name/Nickname: Aria

Gender: female

Star sign: cancer

Height: 5′4 or 5′5

Time: 2:22

Favorite Bands: 5sos, 1d, P!atd

Favorite Solo artists: taylor swift, selena gomez, ariana grande, halsey, all the pop girlies out there

Song stuck in my head: nothing rn so I have a little peace hehe

Last movie: executive decision

Last Show: gossip girl 

When did I create this blog: like last year but I only became active when folklore came out

What do I post: my stupid thoughts and some edits lol

Last thing googled: dorian havilliard (a character from the tog series) and megan fox (because she’s literally gorgeous)

Other blogs: none

Do I get asks: yeah, mostly during ask games or requests for lockscreens

Why I chose my url: because I am a reputation stan first and human second

Average hours of sleep: usually 8 but since I’m on break like 10

Lucky number: anything divisible by 3

Instruments: piano

What am I wearing: a 5sos t-shirt and sweatpants

Dream job: God I have no idea and it’s stressing me out :)

Dream trip: Japan and Australia

Favorite food: peanut stir fry

Nationality: Indian

Favorite song: uh it changes a lot but rn it’s probably long story short, woman by harry styles, and love again by dua lipa

Last book read: Heir of Fire by Sarah J Maas (technically I’m in the middle of it but whatever)

Top three fictional universes I’d like to live in: the tog universe, the acotar universe, and idk after that.... maybe the six of crows universe

tagging: @readyforit @yourdaisy @wearthesamejewels @liljamess and anyone who wants to do it

[yoong-i]

this was supposed to be a fav D-2 lyrics post but it just somehow turned into me rambling my thoughts about D-2 in regard to life and what he’s said in the interviews so far

So I started this and then my computer decided to restart and I lost all of it. And then when I finally finished it and hit save draft one last time, Tumblr stopped working. So if you see anything formatted weirdly, let me know. The universe was against me on this one.

As always, all translators are linked. Check them out and give them credit, they’re great at what they do. Sometimes they update things, so I really do recommend checking out the links to see if they’ve made any updates since I’ve posted.

I love Yoongi’s writing a lot, so I tend to get a bit wordy. I’d say I’m sorry but really, me doing these lyric posts is entirely self-indulgent so, I’m not.

(OK. I wrote that part before I finished and YIKES this ended up being SO LONG I am SORRY)

I want to point out some of the obvious references first that I know everyone on the internet has already figured out, but as I’ve said, idc. I like to have things in one place so I can look back at it. These ones don’t need much explanation, I feel, so I’m just gonna leave them here. Credits for these are with their songs down below.

“If you think you’re gonna crash, accelerate even harder, you idiot” 

From Moonlight, but also Intro: Never Mind, which is just so Yoongi to me. I think that song gives you an accurate picture of him.

“I got a big house big car big ring, bring anything over, I’ll give it to you” 

From What do you think?, and then No More Dream, Home, and Interlude: Shadow. This gif set breaks the references down nicely. It’s interesting to see the different tones he takes when referencing this line. I think Interlude: Shadow is my favorite, but really, I’m just biased to that song and they’re all truly great.

“I’m a king, I’i m a boss” 

Daechwita to Interlude: Shadow (I am sorry that this song is all I ever talk about all the time). I can’t remember if he references wanting to be the king/top in other songs, and I’m too lazy to check right now. So I’m going to go with no unless someone would like to correct me, I don’t mind.

There’s also the Burn It/Outro: Tear references that are just too much to copy and paste, really. I’m sure an argument can be made that it’s the whole song being referenced, but to me, this is the obvious part being referenced from Outro: Tear:

“Right, it’s there, what are you hesitating for? This is the end you wanted I hope you kill quickly without hesitation Woo yeah yeah burn it, woo yeah yeah yeah burn it, woo yeah yeah yeah burn it So that not even ashes are left. This is the real you and this is the real me We’ve now seen the end and there are not even resentments left Awake now from sweet dreams, I close my eyes This is the real you and this is the real me“

~~

While I didn’t list a lyric from Interlude: Set Me Free, I just want to say that I do really love this song, but there just aren’t many lyrics in it. Additionally, I’m not sure what exactly he’s saying he wants to be set free from, and so it doesn’t feel right to make an assumption about the lyrics. (Which is kinda bothering me, not in an annoyed way, but more or less just nagging at me.) But really, I love any interlude from Yoongi. Set Me Free sounds so beautiful and so calming and I wish the bird chirping didn’t drive my cat so crazy so I could enjoy it more.

~~

“Changes are fated to happen to everyone, perhaps, how we change is what our undertaking is about.”

Moonlight. I’ve said this before, but I really do love a good lyric about growing and changing and this mixtape definitely has a lot of it. I think it is interesting that he talks about change like this in the opening song, and then he talks about change in Dear my friend, which is much different given the tone of that whole song. Here, in the very first song, he poses the idea of “change is good, depending how you change” and then delves into a mixtape that discusses “the present” of his life (he tells Billboard in this article that this mixtape is about the present), which I find interesting. I’ll try to touch on it more in Dear my friend.

//

“What’s after this?  Feeling a strong feeling of reality check, a situation where there’s no higher. I had only looked up, now I just wanna look down and gently land.”

Daechwita. Yes, Interlude: Shadow AGAIN (as your local Shadow enthusiast, it only makes sense I pick a lyric that connects.) Although he says don’t let me down in Shadow, in that song I take it more as “I want to come down but I’m terrified of what’s gonna happen.” Where Shadow is more desperate, the tone of Daechwita is definitely more confident. Plus he has that whole mad king thing going for him (and then the whole killing the mad king thing) which Muish discusses wonderfully in the translation I linked.

This is another thing I love about Yoongi and his lyrics. He’s discussing the same thing in the lines of these different songs, but you get to witness these two battling personas when it comes to the topic. And I guess that is the point of there being a difference between Suga and Agust D, but I do wonder where Yoongi falls between these two. He lets you see his struggle and that’s why I love his writing. (I also love that for this song he says focus more on the visual and auditory enjoyment than the lyrics. The video really does tell a good story.)

//

“Crazy that you’d think that my success has a connection to your failure.”

“I have no fucking interest in those who ask whether idol music is music.”

What do you think? The idol lyric may seem like a weird choice, but as a long time boyband stan I’m so over the way artists who were/are in boybands get disregarded for their talent. I’ve come to realize I just need to stop caring whether or not they are socially accepted by “others” and just enjoy what music they are choosing to share with me and those who support them.

I don’t have much to say about the success lyric. It’s just Yoongi being his usual self and I love it.

//

“Capital injects morphine called hope with dream as collateral“

The first time I read this I did a double take. Much to unpack here, but I think that is even beyond me. Interpret it as you please.

“The one who has his eyes open in the world that has its eyes closed — now they make him blind, isn’t it strange.” 

Namjoon has a similar lyric later, but rather than the second half of Yoongi’s lyric, Joon says “that he has his eyes open alone is so much more strange for me” and I love the contrast between the two. Very on brand too.

“But still, life goes on, somehow, just like this, everyone, in their own chicken coop, says they’re okay.”

Strange. I had to stop myself because it is very hard to just not copy and paste the whole freakin song. I love anything these two create together as they are two of the most wonderful lyricists I have ever seen. Going off of that, this song is very reminiscent of Respect for me. Do yourself a favor and just sit down and read through these lyrics (Strange, but also I always recommend Respect). Songs like these make me wish I was a fly on the wall for conversations between these two.

//

“People change, just as I have, there’s nothing eternal about life, they’re all happenings that pass by”

“Did someone say humans are the animals of wisdom? The way I see it, humans are the animals of regret”

People. I love this song a lot (and NOT just because he sounds like an angel in it...) Despite that, I’m not sure why but I found myself stuck on what he was trying to say with this song as a whole. I enlisted my best friend for help and she gave me some good insight and one of the things she said was “good can come out of living each day like it means something.” While I didn’t see this song as inherently negative, I don’t think I was viewing the song in a way that would have allowed me to see this silver lining. I saw it as more cynical I guess?

//

“Tomorrow will come and go once again, this kind of me, that kind of you are both simply enduring the day, I guess.”

Honsool. Time isn’t real. Am I writing this at 2 o’clock in the morning when I should be asleep? Maybe so. But time isn’t real and the days come and go and we’re all just enduring. I like the word choice there. Not surviving, or getting by, or living. We’re enduring.

//

“I grow older and become to know the world, and yet, would it have been better to not know the world?”

Ignorance is bliss. Kinda. This lyric actually reminded me of Nightmare by Halsey, one part specifically: “'Cause kindness is weakness, or worse, you're complacent, I could play nice or I could be a bully, I'm tired and angry, but somebody should be” And like. Yeah. Would I rather be ignorant to all the world’s problems and not give a shit about anything just to be happy, or should I let myself succumb to believing in cynicism for the sake of the world and caring about things? I used a different translation for this lyric than I did for the other two lyrics in 28.

“To live, live, live just one day without any worries, just one day without any concerns.” 

“I thought it’d change when I turned twenty, I thought it’d change when I graduated, Shit, if I’m thirty like this, this, And so, so, what’s changed with me?”

28. This was another one of those where I had to stop and tell myself, Ahna, please do not copy every lyric. But, just know that I wanted to. We spend so many of our days looking forward because we are so displeased with where we are currently at (reminder: this mixtape is about the present.) There’s the constant thought of “once I achieve this thing, it’ll be better!” We’ve all done it, I’ve done it, and I truly hate it. The difference here is you have someone like Yoongi, who is at the top, who has it “all” and he is still stuck in this mindset. Oh, also, hi he’s talking about change again. 

//

“[Always], the choice and decision is yours to make. I hope you don’t forget that giving up decisively also counts as courage.”

Burn It. It is now 4am and Burn It just came on shuffle and I’ve been staring at this lyric for a bit too long, hating my 2pm fully conscious self for choosing this one and leaving writing about it for last. This lyric is existential crisis content. I don’t think I’ve ever in my life heard someone talk about giving up in this way. Giving up can be so powerless, but thinking about giving up in this way not only restores power, but also praises you for being able to make such a decision bold decision for yourself. Makes you think a lot about Yoongi and how he turned out the way he has.

Yoongi reiterated a similar thought in the interview with TIME: “It’s good to know that it’s fine when things go in an unintended direction, because you can always start over again. Keep calm, take the next-best option and move forward.” And this translator also points out another instance, just a month before he dropped his mixtape, of him saying basically the same thing again to one of the listeners on his Live who said they gave up their dream: “I don’t know what circumstances you were in, but I think you must have had tremendous courage. Giving something up decisively takes lots of courage. And, you’ve worked hard.” Like, is he trying to make me cry? 

//

“Was it you who changed? Or was it me? I hate this flowing time, it's us who changed.”

Dear my friend. First, in regard to the lyric itself, there are so many friendships we look back on, ruined or not, and wonder whose fault it was. Maybe even blame them if it’s easier. While it does vary by friendship, I do think it’s important to step back and question our place in it all going wrong, and how we have changed as well. The “I hate this flowing time, it's us who changed” reminds me of how sometimes there truly is nothing you can do when it comes to changing and growing apart from people. It’s not your fault, it’s not my fault, we have changed in ways we both needed to and we are not compatible anymore. I do think the overarching theme in Dear my friend is different from this, however.

I was not expecting this song at all. I think a lot of stuff Yoongi writes is very open and vulnerable, but this song really took me by surprise because it’s a different kind of open. This song will make you miss friendships and people that went downhill, wondering what more you could have done for them. Why he gotta do me like this.

Going back to the thought I posed in Moonlight, in Dear my friend we witness a change that just... isn’t good. Aside from that, on an album which is supposedly all about the present of his life, this song is not. Maybe it is present because it is something that still clearly bothers him, and something, or rather someone, he thinks about a lot, but I still find it interesting. Maybe it was just a sentiment he felt he really needed to get out. 

He talks about change a lot on this album, yet when they ask him in the D-2 interviews (TIME/Billboard) about how he feels things have changed since the last mixtape, he says he doesn’t feel his life really changed.

If you listen to Intro: Never Mind, he says the only thing he feels that’s different about him is his height, and that he’s mature compared to people his age. That must be very grounding, feeling that despite the whirlwind of his life and fame he is still the same person he’s always been. And then again, 5 years later in 2020, the only change he mentions about himself is that he’s matured. I guess “matured” can be taken different ways, especially in regard to the way he talks about growth on this album. But I respect and admire him talking about himself like this. I appreciate the introspection and I take maturing in this context as a positive thing. I take it as him growing in good ways, becoming better versions of himself, which I feel shows in the art he produces. 

One more thought, and it goes back to the interviews. Yoongi told TIME “what’s good is good” is his philosophy. I think back to 28 and People, and the drastic difference between his life and mine, or as he would say, the difference between our ordinaries and extraordinaries, yet we both have the same bad habits and worries about the future.  

Yoongi seems like a walking hazard sign for wanting more or too much, warning of it not being better and it being lonely to have “everything” you want. Considering how simple the phrase “what’s good is good” is, I have spent too long thinking about it in relation to all of this. He uses it in People when talking about the average ordinary life. In the new Break the Silence docu-series, he talks about not being able to do ordinary things like go out for a coffee or to the movies. It is once again his reminder, things are not better up there. You will still struggle. Be content with what you have. If it’s good, its good, and what’s good is good. Let it be. 

~~

This felt like a good ending note, and then I remembered Billboard asked him, “What is a line or thought you share on D-2 you want listeners to be left thinking about?“ And this was his answer:

“So what, if we live like that, so what My distinction is your ordinary My ordinary is your distinction”

I thought it was funny that I somehow ended this by talking about the one thing he wanted to leave us thinking about. Mission accomplished Yoongi.

~~

In regard to raising questions about norms and how we live, Yoongi said he just merely wanted to raise the question mark - not provide the answers - and boy did he here. I will be thinking about this all for a while. This took me so much longer to write than intended, mostly just because I wasn’t expecting to feel so strongly about all the songs.  Thank you for the art honey my dude.

[akabrookiej04-blog]

K-Pop unpopular opinions

So this is my first post on Tumblr. Cool. 

ME AND THE K-POP GENRE

First thing first, why I like K-pop.

K-pop is not my favorite genre in today’s scene, my favorite genres are Rock, Metal and Alternative. As y’all can see, I’m emo and a hard-die fan of MCR and in general, I love emo groups as P!ATD, Fall out Boy, etc. I also do like a lot of metal and alternative bands, as Rammstein, Metallica, Alice In Chains, Ghost (ik a lot of people don’t like them, but idc I f*ckin love them), Coldplay, Foals, Glass Animals, Alt-J and I can say a lot more, but I don’t think I need to. So as you can see, my favorites genres have nothing to do with K-pop, so let me tell you how I entered this world.

So all of this happened in the summer of 2018 when I just came from Dublin, you know, the moment school has ended and you go traveling with your friends and all that stuff. Still remember it as one of the best experiences in my life tho.

So there I was, again in my country, with nothing to do, bored af, listening to the same music again and again. And I was so tired of listening to the same songs again and again. 

I was listening to “No Drama” by Tinashe and Offset on Youtube when “Fake Love” by BTS appeared in my recommended. I was really bored and wanting to die, so I told myself, “why not”.

And yeah... I spent 4 hours listening to BTS music. It was amusing tho.

By the end of the summer, I was an Army, I knew a lot of K-pop groups, I was into that sh*t. I started with BTS, then Blackpink, Twice, NCT, Red Velvet, Exo... I started with the same as people my age and k-popers in 2019.

At first in k-pop, I was so amused that I liked everything I was seeing, but, you get more experienced and you start to like other things and to dislike some you did love at first.

Now that I’m a little more experienced, I can tell my favorite groups are 2NE1, 4minute, f(x), Big Bang, Dreamcatcher and well, BTS (even tho lately I had been having encountered ideas about them).

But still, I like being honest to myself and I have my opinions. I moved on to other genres like metal and grunge etc. and I left k-pop to the side tbh. Some of the groups that I did like at first now they’re not my sh*t, I find some things kinda annoying now and as consequence I dislike some songs that I used to love.

Now that the introduction is done, and I don’t have anything else to say, let’s start.

These are my opinions, and if you have others I still respect them bro, so respect mines. Let’s get it.

MY K-POP UNPOPULAR OPINIONS

1. Aegyo and cute concepts are cringey.

Dude, 20-year-olds acting like babies is just annoying. These kinda 12-years-old voices that some idols have to fake is just... For example, Rosé from Blackpink. Man, let her sing with her real voice. Being brutally honest, cute concept choreos are all the same, they just don’t tell me anything. The thing I hate the most is that for these concepts some idols are forced to wear clothes that ain’t their style... So annoying, dude. (Groups that follow these concepts and I just don’t like as much as I used to, are Twice and Loona)

2. I think that interviews in English are boring if only one member knows how to speak English. They are idols, they should know at least the basics to communicate. Having to watch and listen to just one idol trying their best to communicate while the others are just doing the m*therfucker ain’t that funny.

3. Dating bans are stupid, they are used as a way to keep fans following their idol. Because if a fan knows their idol is dating it makes them seem unavailable. To childish fans (or most k-popers) being able to dream of dating and marrying their idol it’s more appealing to bias someone and continue dreaming a non-existent future. Real fans don’t care about the dating life of an idol, so they should be able to do whatever the f*ck they want.

4. Sexy concepts and badass ones are the best, fight me.

From what I heard from Korea, the racism and how conservative and close-minded some koreans are, I think these concepts break a Lil’ the rules. Idols like CL, songs as Hate (4minute), Jessi, Hyuna, etc. break korean schemes and rules, and they make me reset my faith in humanity like, come on bro, we all can be open-minded, live and let other people live. 

Also, I think that these concepts have the best choreos, aggresive choreos are just so cool, and as well as they have the best instrumentals, noisy ones are just f*cking awesome, change my mind. The fact that they show 20-years-old as mature, strong people is just high-quality stuff. (Groups that blow my mind with this concepts are for example Ateez and Dreamcatcher)

5. Loona stans are so annoying with their “stan Loona”. B*tches, stop being so annoying. If we don’t want to stand your group we’re not gonna, stop that bullsh*t. Anyway, I’m not hating on Loona or her non-psycho fans.

6. Red Velvet lasts songs, Zimzalabim and Umpah Umpah are just messy. Their recent concepts are messy, they look uncomfortable in their clothes and the choreos ain’t that good neither. Hope their next comeback is better tho, they have the potential to do it.

7. Mamamoo are the real queens of k-pop, people should stop sleeping on them, they’re are amazing and their personalities are brilliant. On stage they are one of the best groups so far, their voices are just so stable and powerful. They have the potential to be as big as Blackpink or BTS, so y’all should stop sleeping on them, homies.

8. There are so many Twice songs that sound the same. Feel Special is not that much of a bop tho, and they have a lot of songs that are just simply a miss. Sorry, my dudes. I think a more mature concept would fit them so well, with a more powerful instrumental, with that, they would conquer the k-pop world.

9. Chung Ha’s songs ain’t that good. Snappin’ aesthetic is gorgeous, the concept is so attractive, but the song itself it’s boring. She’s pretty, she knows how to dance, her aesthetic is f*ckin’ awesome, but I feel like her songs need smth to spice them up. They need that smth that they don’t have to turn them to bops. (Also I hate Chica with all my life, that song just gets me on my nerves).

10. Y’all are gonna hate me with this one, but I think BAAM and BBoom BBoom ain’t the same. Like man, it’s true they sound alike, but to me, they have such different vibes. BBoom BBoom it’s amusing and cheerful, has this kinda vibes that make you wanna dance, and BAAM has this kinda nostalgic, melancholic vibe in the sound of the song that sets your heart on fire. That’s the way I find them, it’s my opinion.

11. I know y’all have been waiting for this moment. Let’s talk about BTS. Armys, say whatever the f*ck you want, but as a real one, I’m gonna spill the tea. Their music now is worse, too commercial and doesn’t transmit any feeling. Come on, let’s admit it dudes, is the reality.

Boy With Luv ain’t good. Halsey is a good singer with so much potential, Nightmare and Without Me are pretty good examples of this, and they did her so dirty. Also, the lyrics are just cringey. I don’t know about you, but Come be my teacher and your one, your two, don’t say anything to me. In general, I feel like Map Of The Soul: Persona ain’t that good of an album. They could’ve used the concept of Dionysus in all the album, I don’t know, something like greek gods flexin’ their money in all the album, and it could’ve be such a bomb. Make it Right, Home and Dionysus are the only remarkable songs of the album, the rest are just meh, I could listen to them 200 times and they won’t stick to me, they’re just basic and boring. They have changed, my dudes. I feel like they’re not who they were once anymore. It’s a fact that they slay on stage and their voices are stable (not all of their voices tho). Their concerts are bomb, the choreos are amazing and that’s something we cannot deny. (But the inflatable castle for Anpanman was a no for me). In conclusion, their music now is just commercial basic pop, they should try to mix their old sounds with smth new.

Well, my dudes, I have more opinions on k-pop but you know, I think this is long enough, in the future I will make a second part of this, but for now, this is all.

Tell me your opinions if you want, and if not it’s also okay.

That’s all folks, bye.

- Brooke.

[hallelujuh]

shay’s favorite albums of 2017

didn’t commit to finishing this until the literal very end of 2018 but whatever fdjhfkjdsnfds

I’m not sure if it was my newfound willingness to explore new genres and artists, but I thought 2017 was a fantastic year for music. Plenty old favorites of mine released new albums this year, and I was lucky enough to discover a lot of music, both from new musicians and old. Here’s my top twenty albums of this year.

20. Divide by Ed Sheeran

19. Fin by Syd

18. Blossom by Milky Chance

17. I See You by the xx

16. Trip by Jhene Aiko

15. Good for You by Amine

14. Future Friends by Superfruit

13. Sacred Hearts Club by Foster the People

12. American Teen by Khalid

11. All We Know of Heaven, All We Need of Hell by Pvris

10. From the Outside by Hey Violet - While I originally only cared about this band because it’s composed of mostly girls, which is rare, I’ve grown to really love them as musicians. They’re very creative, producing catchy pop tracks that aren’t like most pop songs, and their debut album is fun as hell. Each song makes the listener feel badass and sexy and young, and you just kinda wanna dance and enjoy life. Favorite track: Tie between Like Lovers Do and Unholy. The former is distinctive and unique, and reminds me of Emilie Autumn, and the latter is incredibly well-produced and pretty visceral for a pop track by such a young band. 

9. After Laughter by Paramore - Continuing their previous album’s sound so that every song sounds like Ain’t It Fun, After Laughter has a gorgeous aesthetic, a memorable sound, and, notably, follows the trend of most emo artists of today - disguising sad lyrics beneath happy music, as made famous by Twenty One Pilots. Each song is catchy, allow the lyrics all leave you feeling a bit empty, but you’ll be dancing to misery. Favorite track: 26. I’m always a sucker for the one mellow song on an album full of bops, and that rang true once more. 26 is about reflecting back on how you’ve spent your youth, and it’s paired with a bittersweet simplistic guitar. Hayley’s vocals hold pain, but also gratitude.

8. Hopeless Fountain Kingdom by Halsey - I’ve been a huge Halsey fan since before Badlands even came out, when all we had was Room 93 and live versions of then-unreleased tracks. Though her evolving sound was criticized by some, I appreciated that HFK follows the formula so many other sophomore records follow, with the lyrics addressing new-found fame and how the artist is dealing with it, and also how they want their sound to be since they’ve already made it big. This record was clearly more hip-hop driven, with production that sounded heavily influenced by Kanye, but it felt fitting. Furthermore, HFK is the redemption arc to Badland’s heartbreak-themes. It’s really a triumphant album overall. Favorite track: Sorry. While 100 Letters is my most-played track and therefore a close second, because the simplistic beat allows Ashley’s lyrics to shine, and she’s a lyricist and a poet before she’s a singer - I believe Sorry is the quintessential song from this record. Her pain is so tangible in this stripped-down ballad, and it’s such a nice switch from her usual lust-driven upbeat songs. I always have respect for musicians who can bear their sleeve in such an open, honest way, and while Ashley’s always been vocal about her struggles, it’s still nice to hear such a heartfelt track come about even after all her success.

7. Dua Lipa by Dua Lipa - This young pop singer's self-titled debut is a catchy, passionate, and solid record that's earned her a well-deserved place on the charts and in people's playlists. The songs are rather cliched, recycled themes that I've heard from dozens of other young female artists, but there's some emotionally-charged pop ballads that show potential. Dua's vocals remind me of a raspier Ariana Grande mixed with a less-powerful Christina Aguilera. Seeing as those two aforementioned singers can over-do their performances a bit, I enjoyed this mellower newcomer. Don't get me wrong, Dua's unique in her own way, and she's hardly a copycat; but I'm worried her talent will overlooked because there's already others like her. Still, it was a solid album that I enjoy thoroughly, and I had multiple tracks from it on repeat.

6. Beautiful Trauma by P!nk - I've been a P!nk fan since I was very young, and this album was wonderfully nostalgic to me. P!nk's one of the few artists who's never been swayed by a need to stay relevant; she just makes the music she wants to make, and her fans love her for it. This record was, at times, a little generic beat-wise, but still distinctly P!nk. As always, she wore her heart on her sleeve and you can feel how personal every song is; how genuine every word is. It really pays off. Favorite track: Barbies - This is a song I think every girl over thirteen can relate to. I'm twenty years younger than P!nk, but this track really resonated with me. It was the only song on this record I listened to repeatedly. I think every girl wants to grow up as quickly as possible, but once you reach adulthood, you just want to be a kid again. You long for simpler times. The beautiful message of the song (enjoy your youth) is paired beautifully with gorgeous instruments (violin! cello! wow!), which adds a timelessness to the track.

5. One More Light by Linkin Park - Although most, myself included, were unhappy with the pop-driven sound of LP’s seventh effort, the death of Chester added a lot to how meaningful this album is. Listening to it now fills me with a hopeful nostalgia, in contrast with how I listened to it in the days following his passing. What once sounded like a cry for help that no one listened to, now sounds like a triumphant farewell. As usual, these guys put their hearts into the making of this record, and it’s a real bummer that it took Chester killing himself to make people appreciate that. LP is a master at their craft, regardless of what genre they’re feeling at the moment. It’s a solid album, full of truly heartfelt lyrics and Chester’s beautiful voice, and I’ve often found myself listening to it when I’m feeling down. It really helps. And that’s what LP’s music has always been about, I think. Being there for you when you feel like no one else is. This album still felt like that, even though it was through a different genre. They let go of the anger that fueled their signature sound in the beginning, in exchange for a more rounded, reflective take on things. I think that’s comforting, and beautiful, in a way no one seemed to understand. What’s better than someone making peace with the world? Alternatively, what’s worse than someone taking their own life because people didn’t want to see them get better? Favorite track: Talking to Myself. I watched this video the day it was released - hours before Chester’s passing was announced. I enjoyed the bass and the video made me smile. After I found out, and after a few hours of crying, I rewatched this video, and it meant so much more the second time. The song itself is a favorite because it’s such a fun track. The bass line is catchy as hell, and my favorite part of the song is the chorus following the bridge, where Chester does a powerful run and then briefly lapses into Meteora-style vocals (”you keep running like the sky is falling”). That bit is so profoundly incredible to listen to for me, and I’m glad he left us with it.

4. Revival by Eminem - I’m one of the biggest Eminem stans of all time, so I’d probably buy a record that consisted entirely of Marshall shitting - but in all actuality, though he could never disappoint me, I was prepared for the worst, and I was pleasantly surprised. This album felt more solid than MMLP2′s experimental sounds, with Em showing us he really hasn’t fallen off. His usage of words like “lit” and “shook” are admittedly a little cringey, and his take at a more modern sound on Believe (with a trap beat and a Migos-like flow) is questionable, but the lyrics show he’s just as on top of his game than ever. It’s not an instant-classic like MMLP - those days are probably over - but it’s a decent record with several damn good songs. (Edit, 12/2018: Bro I wrote this last year, what the fuck was I on dgfkjdgh.) Favorite track: In Your Head. While the most memorable tracks on this record are definitely the collaborations - my favorites being River with Ed Sheeran and Need Me with P!nk - this rather short track really stood out. I listened to the album for the first time on my CD player, without having looked at the track listing since it was released a few weeks back, so every song was a surprise, and when I heard O'Riordan’s vocals, I got very excited, since Zombie is one of my favorite songs of all time. Though the original song is about war, Em raps over the sample track’s bass line and signature guitar riff and speaks about the skeletons in his closet with a passion reminiscent of The Eminem Show and a flow taken from his Recovery days. The smooth transition to Castle is another nice touch. While his speed in the last thirty seconds of Offended is impressive (with Flight of the Bumblebee in the background! Ha!), this was the song that sold me on this album. It’s everything I love about Eminem. (Note: This was written before O’Riordan’s passing. RIP.)

3. Scum Fuck / Flower Boy by Tyler, the Creator - From the goofy poster boy of a generation of carefree and colorfully dressed punks, to an extremely talented and capable producer and musician, watching Tyler’s growth as an artist and a human has been extremely rewarding, especially as a longtime Tyler/OF fan. While Cherry Bomb failed to impress me in the midst of my emo-craze, I appreciated that it was a turning point in Tyler’s career. SFFB, however, successfully took me right out of my indie-craze. Flower Boy builds upon what Tyler tried to do on CB, and it works out much better. Watching his brilliant NPR Tiny Desk Concert only solidified this belief. Tyler’s a musical genius, and I hope more people come to realize it. Favorite track: 911/Mr. Lonely. The whole record is full of earworms - Glitter, Boredom, See You Again - and it’s truly a feat Tyler was able to pull that off. But I have to go with this single - both songs are catchy, the production is masterful, Frank Ocean and Steve Lacy’s voices are beautiful. Who Dat Boy didn’t particularly excite me upon first listen, but these two tracks did, because they reminded me how talented and incredible Tyler is.

2. DAMN. by Kendrick Lamar - My favorite thing about musicians is getting to watch them mature, both musically and personally. I’ve frequently compared DAMN to J. Cole’s 4 Your Eyez Only, as both records feature Jermaine and Kendrick discussing much more mature concepts within their albums. Kendrick’s always been grounded because of his upbringing, whereas Cole was a little more blinded by fame for the first few albums. However, since their respective last albums, Kendrick has gotten engaged, and Cole got married and had a little girl (EDIT: Apparently he had a boy!), and you can hear how these lifestyle changes have influenced their lyrical content, which is really nice to behold. Kendrick’s always seemed like a very intelligent person, with an understanding of the world many in his field lack, and this album highlights that beautifully.  Favorite track: Humble. While Love’s a personal favorite, Humble’s success reminded me of Control. I still remember the day that dropped - and Humble felt similar, as it was Kendrick reminding us that he’s simply on another level. The simplistic and almost grating beat excellently parodies every single rap song that’s on the radio these days, except Kendrick proves his superiority by showing us that the beat’s not the important part; the lyrics are. It’s genius, and I’ll never get over how iconic it is, honestly.

1. Saturation I, II, & III by Brockhampton - Because this remarkably talented new group released three new records this year, and I can’t pick a favorite, nor can or do I want to rate them separately, they easily earn this spot. With flawless and innovative production, refreshingly creative and intricate lyrics, remarkable versatility, and, best of all, a youthful individuality reminiscent of Odd Future circa 2011, Brockhampton is one of the best things 2017 has offered. I’ve grown attached to these kids, and I’m glad I’ll be able to see where they go and how big they get. Favorite track: Star. While Junky is the most impressive track, and Follow is my personal favorite, Star earns this spot because it’s the song that single-handedly got me into Brockhampton. The name-dropping bop is a good introduction to the band, as it features their signature memorably synth-infused beats, Ameer’s clever wordplay, Ian’s favorite thing to talk about (his sexuality) as well as his penchant for hooks and bridges, Merlyn’s loud and brash vocals, etc. I won’t be compiling a list of my favorite songs of this year, but if I did, this would easily make the top ten. It reminded me exactly why I love rap music, in a time when I was beginning to doubt hip hop.

honorable mentions

CTRL by SZA - Though I’d never heard of SZA aside from her feature on Consideration, this album was hyped immensely by Twitter, so I felt I had to check it out. Unfortunately I was disappointed. Although the album’s masterfully done, and I love the production and her voice, the lyrical content ruined it for me. Of course, this is personal preference, and she’s allowed to write songs about whatever the hell she wants to, but the nature of the lyrics were what kept me from being a fan. To each their own, I guess.

Everybody by Logic - I wasn’t a big Logic fan prior to 1-800. Funny story, actually - I thought he was entirely white, and I’m vehemently against white rappers. He's more like a biracial Kendrick, especially in flow on Hallelujah. The record continues the trend started by Bey’s Lemonade of celebrating black power and beauty, with Logic demonstrating a fresh, biracial perspective on it. Loved that there were actual instrumentals, that was refreshing, considering modern rap beats are often created entirely using synthesizers. Also love that Logic’s cementing himself as the Inclusive Rapper, and accepting that title proudly. Good for him.

I Decided by Big Sean - I’ve been a casual Big Sean fan since Finally Famous (2011), but he’s very rarely impressed me with his lyricism. This album showed that Sean’s matured and grown as a person and a rapper, but the songs didn’t leave enough of an impression on me to be featured on my list.

Lust for Life by Lana Del Rey - Although I’m sure die-hards were more than happy with this record, I didn’t enjoy it as much as I wish I could’ve. Lana’s sound hasn’t changed much, so I don’t think the quality of her music is decreasing, I just think my tastes are changing. This newer stuff hasn’t appealed to me nearly as much as her Born to Die/Paradise stuff did. I think 2012!me would’ve loved this record, but 2017!me was unsatisfied.

Melodrama by Lorde - I can always appreciate growth in an artist, but in Lorde’s case, I couldn’t bring myself to like the change. While there’s traces of the sound that put her on the map, and the music still sounds like teenage rebellion, it just doesn’t invoke the same feelings. It’s less grounded - and not in a good way.

Lovely Little Lonely by The Maine - The pop punk 1D continues to make catchy, solid tunes, but nothing about this record particularly stands out to me. Still, it’s a decent album from an underrated band.

extended plays

they’re too short to be included in my top albums, but i wanted to mention them anyway.

Caught Up by Sarah Close - I found this adorable Brit through her fantastic covers of popular songs, and thankfully I was subscribed when she started posting original music. Caught Up isn’t particularly unique, but the songs are fun, her voice is wonderful, and it’s a solid little EP.

Y.O.U by Dodie - I’ve watched Dodie’s covers for a while, so it’s nice to see she’s making original stuff. Love the style of it. Very excited to see what she puts out next.

dont smile at me by Billy Eilish - The fifteen-year-old, who sounds very similar to the recently-disgraced Melanie Martinez, may talk like an annoying skater boy, but her angelic singing voice keeps pulling me back in. I’m not used to talented celebrities being younger than me. It’s depressing. (EDIT: I spelled Billie wrong jdgdhf she’s in my top 10 artists of this year now too hahh)

Hard by The Neighbourhood - This band has been a favorite for four years now; I even saw them live for my birthday in 2015. They could never disappoint me, but their recent music hasn’t changed much to what long-time fans like myself fell in love with in the days of I Love You, which is nice to see, when so many other artists I used to like are experimenting with their sound in unflattering ways.

[gaykuvira]

I am a Halsey stan first and a human being second and LET ME JUST SAY that she is so fucking sexy in the Strangers music video

[annacoleman]

I am now a halsey stan first and human second

well besties, I’m off to see halsey!💖

[ellalovertay]

According to my birth certificate, I turn 18 this year. It's weird because I am now a legal adult and can do legal adult things… whoa. Through 18 years of my life I've had many ups and downs, mistakes and accomplishments and laughs and tears. So as my “kid” years come to an end and my adult years pave the path ahead of me, I thought I'd share some lessons I've learned before reaching 18. Because it's 2020 and sharing is caring.

1

I've learned (and am still working on) accepting that it is okay not to be okay. When people ask you “how are you doing” there is nothing wrong with the response of “I'm not doing so good.” I know how hard it can be to express honesty and feel vulnerable but that’s human emotion, it's good. There is nothing wrong with not being okay, and you are allowed to experience that, it shouldn't be something that is feared. Next time you feel like that, say, “I'm not fine right now but I am going to be fine soon.”

2

I found what makes me happy. Like not just a, “Oh yeah I’m great today” kind of feeling, but a lifelong happiness feeling. I've been writing songs since I was 9 years old and in the past 6 months, songwriting has been the only thing keeping me on my feet and putting a smile on my face. Lyrics from other artists (shoutout to Taylor Swift Selena Gomez and Halsey) have always spoken and resonated deeply with me. So when things in my life started going downhill, I wrote my own lyrics. I hope one day people will experience my lyrics and they will be able to help someone like they helped me.

3

Trust is important. In any type of relationship with friends, family, pets etc, trust is key. A lot has happened in my life recently. Over the course of 6 months I've completely lost my trust in everyone and everything. I'm slowly working on building it back up again and learning how I can trust... but that is easier said than done.

4

It's okay to be confused about what's going to happen in the future. I have changed what I want my job to be at LEAST 5 times since 9th grade. Some examples include a marine biologist, a BAU member in the FBI, a criminologist, and a neurologist. Of course all of these things strike interest in me and make me happy, but I can't see myself there in 10 years. I've learned music is important to me and I want to study song/lyric writing along with vocals and music industry in college, with hopes to become a singer/songwriter.

5

Halsey has KILLER music. I knew around 3 of her songs before her album “Manic” dropped. I stayed up for release, downloaded the whole thing, listened to it and fell in love. Then tour tickets dropped, I got early access and I bought them in english class. She is really phenomenal and I love her dearly.

6

Some people in life will backstab you, others will stand by your side. But true friends will talk sh!t about the backstabbers and want to kick their asses for you. I've found that person and I'm so glad that she is in my life. And for once in my whole life, I feel like I have a best friend who won't just drop me.

7

I’ve learned you don't owe anybody an explanation. If someone asks,” How are you” and you say, “Not good” you are not entitled to state why. That is for you and your mind to know. If your best friend asks “do you want to come over/” and you say “no” Guess what… you DON'T owe them an explanation as to why! Don't ever feel pressured to explain things to people about yourself or situations you're in.

8

I'm literally a spot on Libra. My star sign is SO COOL! Up until June I never cared about my sign or horoscope, but when I found out the Libra symbol was the “Scales of Justice…” I read up on some stuff. I was SHOCKED by how much I fit my sign. Example being: we get irritated when people ask us stupid questions... Like if that isn't me then what is???

9

Being 18 means I get to vote! With everything going on in the world right now i've taken to educating myself as much as possible before november. I'm undecided (edit: not anymore😆) and excited but scared.

10

When your parents say, “Don't talk to strangers online” don't listen. I've made some of my best friends online (through Taylor, omg shocker) and I don't know what I would do without them. So here's a toast to my real friends: Vivian, Ella, Emily, Jordan, Delaney, Megan, Shannon, Sophie, Lauren, Brooke, Addison, Lexi, Hayley, Ry, Mikayla, Liv, Meghan, Rachel, Kaylee, and so many more <3

11

I've learned that everything happens for a reason. When I got confirmed, the idea that “everything happens for a reason” really stuck with me. The belief only grew stronger after I attended Kairos in November 2019. I truly believe God has a plan and everything happening in my life is going to end up being a part of some greater, master plan. God gives the hardest battles to his strongest warriors and just know that the shadows can’t last forever. Storms help the flowers flourish, and afterwards comes a rainbow.

12

My mom is a warrior.

13

Taylor Swift. That's it. That's the tweet. Very long story short I’ve listened to Taylor since fearless in 2008. Thanks mom! In 2012, when “RED” came out, I memorized lyrics and wanted concert tickets. The same thing in 2014 with “1989.” It wasn't until “reputation” in 2017 that I understood the “fandom” and became a full on swiftie. Fun fact: I have a stan account on twitter, tumblr and instagram where her management team follows me! Taylor has helped me through so many hard times. Her and her music have made me laugh, smile, cry, and dance. She is one of the only constants in my life and she treats her fans like her best friends. I have made so many friends through her that I can't wait to meet. And one day, I will meet Taylor Swift.

14

I can play instruments! I learned the ukulele when I was 12 because Tess was learning guitar. I hated it. I felt so trapped and the instructor was sooo mean. I wanted to play chords and sing Taylor Swift. Nope. He had me playing strings to old folk music. Long story short I quit.About 2 years later i picked it back up from the depths of my closet and taught myself strings. I got bored and put it away. On july 25th 2019, I picked it back up and this time, I fell in love. I quickly learned chords and by september, I was writing my own music. I thought to myself, “guitar cant be that hard” so I went and took tessa's guitar. I hated it. It was way to big and my hands were far too small. Then, a few months later I tried again. No change. Quarantine was now here and I was bored out of my mind. So… guess what I did on March 19th 2020… learned guitar and fell in love. Now, I'll play until my fingers bleed. Guitar and Ukulele make me so happy and the moral of the story is that if at first you don't succeed, try and try again.

15

Karma is real. If someone does something sh!tty to you, it will come back to bite them in the butt. Trust me.

16

I am tiny. Sadly, I'm done growing and I've been done since 8th grade. I'm forever 5 foot ½ inch- the ½ is VERY important. Also my foot size is forever a 4. Basically it sucks. I can't find any shoes that aren't pink, sparkley, have a 1 inch heel and glow up. With that being said s/o to Nordstrom rack for carrying my size.

17

I've learned to take in every moment. You never know when you won't be able to do the simplest things. Everyday we take so many things for granted. So just let every second of everyday sink in and let it resonate with you because there will never be another moment like that one.

18

I learned that I am allowed to format my own opinions. The beliefs that I have and I value don't have to be the same as everyone else's beliefs: especially my family and friends. I have come to the realization that I view situations in a different light than those around me and it's 100% okay for me to speak my mind. As a young girl I am allowed to grow up and base my social, personal and political opinions on what I believe is right and wrong, not what other people push me to believe.